#what if it doesn't even actually move like an actual crank what if it's just Stuck there on its head

[whateveriwant]

Task force 141 reacting to their very pregnant wife still trying to clean, cook etc

This turned more into ‘Task force 141 preventing their very pregnant wife from trying to clean, cook, etc’ lmaooooo I hope that's alright

Price

HA! Good one!

No seriously, it's actually hilarious that you think you'd do anything for yourself when your hubby's around

That man has been waiting on you hand and foot since you first got together. So now that you're pregnant and you think he'd let you so much as lift a finger? You must have a serious case of pregnancy brain, sweetheart

Price is doing all the cooking, the cleaning, the running errands, etc. throughout the entirety of your pregnancy (and at least the first several months postpartum)

He's kept you practically bed bound these last few months to the point where you think there's a perfect indent of your body molded into the mattress

Seven months in, he's suddenly called away to a quick mission halfway across the globe, and you think finally you'll get some of your autonomy back...

Well, think again because who should show up at your door the next morning than your mother-in-law herself, ready to pick up where her son left off

She came at the behest of your husband, of course, and was armed with a detailed set of care instructions

What does your husband think you are? Some sort of one-of-a-kind, priceless artifact that needs special handling? (Actually that's exactly what you are. Price-less… I'll see myself out 🚶🏻‍♀️)

Ghost

When it comes to having some semblance of independence during your pregnancy, Ghost will give you a bit of a longer leash than Price, but only just so

You’re going for a walk around the neighborhood? Hold on, let him grab his coat to join you. Or you're going into the backyard to tend the garden? He'll pull the weeds while you water the plants

But when it comes to letting you do certain things, there are some hard nos that he will absolutely not budge on

You try to use a stepladder to reach the top of the cupboard? Stop! You'll break your neck! You try to pick up anything heavier than 10 pounds? Stop! Give it here! You try to drive?... Don't even fuckin' think about it, precious.

The farther along your pregnancy progresses, the better he gets at predicting (and intercepting) your next move

You were gonna do laundry today? Well, wouldn't you know, he's already got a load going in the washer. You were about to make dinner? Well shucks, he just ordered takeaway from that Greek place you love

His ability to read your mind is honestly impressive once you get past how damn annoying you find it. Just because you're pregnant doesn't mean you're incapable of fending for yourself, and you're tired of him acting as if otherwise

But really, you can never get mad at anything he does for you. After all, what kind of a husband would he be if he didn't take care of his missus and your little one?

Soap

If you take Ghost’s cautiousness, mix it with Price’s thoroughness, and crank it up to an 11, you get Soap

From the moment he found out you were pregnant, he put your house into full lockdown mode, stopping just short of booby trapping the front door in case you got any funny ideas

You want some fresh air? Just open a window. You want to go for a walk and stretch your legs? Just take a few turns about the living room like you're some Austenian heroine

Don't let him catch you doing any kind of physical labor, because so help him Jesus he will grab a spray bottle and use it like you're a feral alleycat he's trying to house-train (he wouldn't really... but don't test him)

You try to unload the dishwasher? Ehrr! Wrong move. You try to remake the bed? Ehrr! Nice try. You try to mop up your own mess. Ehrr! Enough already. You try to– OCH, WOULD YE BLOODY SIT DOWN, WOMAN?!

For nine long months during his requested leave from work, your husband is attached to you like some kind of loving, smothering barnacle

But doesn't he miss his job, or the lads for that matter? What if the world needs saving? What will they do without him?

Well, (in his exact words) fuck the rest of the world! You're his world, bonnie, and he'll give you everything you could ever wish for and then some

Gaz

By far, you have the most independence with Gaz than you would with any of the other three men… at least, at the beginning of your pregnancy, that is

Once you get to around five or six months he becomes just as helicopter-y as all the others; he's just ever so slightly more bearable, perhaps

There's lots of peeking his head around the corner to check on you throughout the day or appearing seemingly out of thin air whenever you're doing something he'd rather you wouldn't

You've lost count of the number of times you've been in the middle of cooking or hanging up the laundry or whatever and his hand has suddenly appeared out of nowhere, gently taking the object from you before directing you to sit and rest

And like, look. He knows you can handle yourself. He knows you could conquer the whole world if you wanted to. That's one of the things he loves about you the most

But seeing you like this – so fragile, so vulnerable, so beautiful and soft and pregnant with his child; his child – it just… It makes him…

He just needs to do these things for you, alright, love? Just let him take care of you, please? Would you let him do that?

You already have so much you have to carry. Let him ease some of the burden off your shoulders. Let him do these small things for you because they don't even compare to all that you're doing for him 🥲

[itshype]

Mansplain Yourself (DC x DP)

Danny decides that attending college and defending the entirety of Earth from ghosts is too hard to maintain alongside a job. He should just get paid to do his hero work!

He shows up on the watchtower with a PowerPoint and printed portfolio proving he's been doing hero work for years. He fought a king from another dimension. He wants some of their money.

"We don't really have a budget? We can't really pay you." Says Superman.

"I am standing in space right now. That guy has a bat-themed submarine, private jet and fleet of automobiles. If you guys aren't rolling in that sweet, sweet USA defence budget cash, how are you affording all of this?"

"Uh, okay, we'll pay you." Says Batman (It's Nightwing subbing in for Bruce tonight and he panics!)

Constantine is cranky. This is a ghost. Ghosts are dead. Why the fuck would he need human money?

Danny's first paycheck clears. He moves out of his parents house and it's all good!

And this is when the trouble begins. Real Batman has noticed the money moving, and questions about the paperwork for the Justice League's 'new employee'.

Constantine is still crank though, and when Danny comes in for a skills assessment he steamrolls the poor guy. Talking over him, correcting him etc.

Danny is tired, he has a paper due before midnight and he doesn't even know what this guy's problem is. So, Danny lets him mansplain his own powers to the Justice League.

The Justice League paperwork for Phantom the Infinite Realms Ghost reads like this:

Senses others of his kind (see appendix 5a)

Intangibility

Self-sustained flight

Knowledge about Infinite Realms (see general database - dimensions, subsection 52), and it's inhabitants.

Danny figures he'll get payback for all his colleges listening to this cigarette-smoking hack over him the first time any of them see him actually fight. But the first fight he's in with them is an easy one, he only really needs to fly and lift some heavy-ish stuff. Then the next one is a false alarm. Then they keep giving the hard jobs to Superman.

Then, about 6 months in - Danny's file now has Super Strength (see appendix 12f) - added. Kal-el goes down. Hard. A single, brutal hit.

…And Wonder Woman takes his place in the plan with ease.

How long is it going to take before Danny gets to (legitimately) show off for once?! He can't wait.

[anyarose011]

"There Must Be Something in the Water" {Aemond x Reader}

Summary: Many men with one eye have followed you home before...but never one with silver hair. What could he possibly want with you?

Part 1 of 3 (Masterlist)

Warning(s): Swearing, vulgar jokes, talk of sex, prostitution, and spice (but not smut)

I jumped on the HOTD bandwagon, and even worse (I don't know how it happened, seriously, I don't), I started loving Aemond "Mommy Issues" Targaryen. I came up with this lovely little mini series, and I hope you enjoy it! If you know where the song in this chapter is from, 100 points to *insert your Hogwarts House*! Also, please don't try and keep a timeline of events (the show for sure doesn't), and if you need help on the Westeros money system, use this.

Word Count: 4.2k

You knew a man was following you one lonesome night. It was like clockwork though; you walking through the empty, darkened streets of King’s Landing, a hollow water jug on your hip as if it were a babe.

It didn’t matter if it was the same one who’d been following you all week; what mattered, was what he had. You hadn’t caught sight of him yet, so perhaps he was a different man. Still, if it wasn’t, then simply from how his eyes must traced over you, he’d plan on coming closer that night.

Wearing only your sandals and a thin dress, you continued down the narrow path. It must’ve been…oh, perhaps three hours before sunrise? If you’d gone any sooner or any later, than members of the City Watch would surely be out.

Whether they wanted to aid or hurt you, it would all be the same.

As faint torches began to appear alongside the walls you walked, and you knew you grew closer to the well, you began to hum lightly at first. Then, you sung even softer; no words, just your voice in its purest form. It was only when you finally made it to the well, and after you sat atop the stones, did you finally add a story to your song.

“Father’s hunting in the forest, Mother’s cooking in the home. I must go to fetch the water, ‘til the day that I am grown.”

You cranked the bucket down into the well, still singing.

“’Til I’m grown, ‘Til I’m grown. I must go to fetch the water, ‘til the day that I am grown.”

You glanced up and saw the shadow of the man who had been following you. He was still peeking out from behind an alley, but once he saw your head move, he stepped out. Yet, you merely kept your back to him, cranking the handle on the well to bring the bucket up.

“Then I will have a handsome husband, and a daughter of my own. Then I’ll send her to fetch the water, I’ll be cooking in the home.”

Taking the bucket off its hook, you poured it carefully into the jug. Setting the bucket back, you then stood up, taking the full jug of water into your arms. Slowly, you began to walk uphill and out of the area of the well, singing quietly.

“My own home, My own home. Then, I’ll send her to fetch the water, I’ll be cooking in my home. My own home, My own-.”

You’d gotten better at making it look like an accident when dropping your jug of water. The first time you’d done it, you glanced back to make sure your unsuspecting victim was watching and let go of it. Needless to say, he was the one that robbed you that night.

The jug rolled down the cobbled hill, and ricocheted off the well, spinning in place. Soon, the silhouette of a man became visible as he came closer to the jug. Your eyes drifted up from the ground. When you saw his face, the first thing you noticed was only one eye; the other, his left eye, covered by a humble patch.

Then, the one thing that frightened you: Long hair that was almost the shade of the sun, it was so light.

This wasn’t a drunken man wandering alone at night, this wasn’t a Kingsguard who had an itch to scratch.

No…no, this was Aemond Targaryen, a prince. A prince who could do anything to you, and you wouldn’t be able to resist; even if you fought.

And he was staring at you from the foot of the hill. You weren’t even at the top, only halfway. In actuality, this wasn’t the most afraid you’d ever been in a situation like this. Still, the way he bent down to pick up the jug without his smile wavering, or his eye never leaving yours, greatly unnerved you.

Then, he turned away from you, approaching the well. Setting down the jug, he began to turn the crank of the well, lowering the bucket back down into the water. This wasn’t the first time a man had done this…yet from a prince?

“Come down now,” he beckoned, not looking at you. “I won’t cause any harm. You look ridiculous.”

You hadn’t any idea at the time what words he would say…but those weren’t what you expected at all. Making a sour face, you slowly trailed down the rocky hill until you were at level with him. Aemond stopped cranking, and finally looked at you.

“I know you aren’t a mute.” He taunted. “You wouldn’t sing so sweetly if you were.”

Still, you refused to speak. Instead, you folded your hands, standing tall as if you were an equal to him. This only widened the smile upon his face. He sat atop the rocks of the well, leaving a space for you.

You approached him, but did not sit. Even as his eyes trailed over your figure (and how little of your curves the dress hid), you remained stoic; at least, as best as you could. It certainly wasn’t the first time a man looked upon you with lust…but it felt stranger now.

“Don’t tell me I have to pay coin solely to have a conversation with you?” He laughed.

“No.” You finally spoke. “But you are the second Targaryen I have witnessed to take comfort in brothels whilst mourning his line in succession.”

…If you were going to die at any point in life, you at least thought you would die in a fight. This wasn’t the one you were imagining, but it would do.

He nodded, his voice returning to what you assumed to be normal; a natural edge to it that one would find difficult to discern if he was angry at them. “I assume my brother was the first to receive your comfort then?”

“He has never laid eyes on me.”

“I have heard the stories of you.” Aemond hissed. “A living siren, luring those thinking with the head between their legs, only to rob them of all they have. How is it possible he has not seen you?”

“Perhaps you underestimate the King’s intelligence.”

“You followed me.” You wanted to say, but only did so in your mind.

He sighed, standing up to be almost toe to toe with you. “If you are not a whore, then how did you come to know I have visited the Street of Silk?”

Dropping your eyes to the ground, they were soon brought back up by Aemond’s hand cupping your jaw. You did not know if it was shock or stupidity, but you weren’t the least bit afraid. He wanted answers, and he wasn’t so pigheaded to kill you before you gave them.

You backed out of his grip, sighing as if he was an inconvenience (he was, but you couldn’t tell him that). “For years I have made deals with the ladies of the night. I come to them in the evening, they tell me what men are still sick with lust, I lure those men, rob them, maim them, kill them if I have to, and share whatever I have taken.”

A smile lurked in the corner of his mouth. “You’ve killed men before?”

You crossed your arms. “Yes.”

“I don’t believe you.”

“It doesn’t matter to me what you believe.”

“Did the women tell you to lure me?”

“They did not tell me it was you.”

“But you knew I was in their attendance.”

“Are you going to fill my jug of water or not?”

Aemond turned back to the well, your empty water jug still resting on the stones. “Answer my question.” He gritted his teeth, yet still brought his hands to the crank and turned it.

You leaned against the basin, watching him and debating your words. “Have you spoken to any women outside your house?”

He snickered (to your surprise and your delight). “You’re very strange.”

“Answer my question.” You teased gently.

“Yes, I have.” The bucket resurfaced, and he took it off the hook. “If my frequent visitations to the Street of Silk haven’t made you aware, then I would say that the gods have cursed you with selective attention.”

“Then you must know that women like to talk.” You sat upon the rocks. “That it would be impossible for them to keep quiet about a silver-haired prince with one eye.”

Aemond said not a word as he poured the water into the jug. When it was filled, he set the bucket back on the hook and walked to stand in front of you. His hands resting on the stones outside of your thighs, caging you.

“Do you favor talking?”

“Only when it brings me favor.”

He brought one of his hands up to your thigh, dancing dangerously close to the inside of it. You sucked in a breath as he asked. “This is what it takes to grant you favor? Dressing yourself up like a doll, singing like a bird for men?”

“Why did you follow me?” You brought your face just a little closer for him to hear your whisper.

“I thought I already told you.” He held your face in his other hand, shutting his eye and hovering his nose above yours. “I have heard the stories; I wanted to see if you were real, and as beautiful as many have claimed.”

You brought your hand to grip onto the wood of the well, steadying yourself as you felt his breath upon your skin. “And what are your thoughts?”

He opened his eye, wearing that same smile. “You’re not…unpleasing to look at.” Pinching your cheek, he drew himself away from you to see the state you contorted your body in. He scoffed. “Seven Hells, you thought I’d push you, didn’t you?”

Relaxing, you hopped down from where you sat, cradling the heavy jug of water into your arms. “You can never be careful around men.”

He hummed. “Especially those who look like the monsters mothers tell their children hide that under their beds.”

“I would’ve thought that if I hadn’t spoken to you.” You tried to pass by him.

His hand came to rest on your bare shoulder; his fingers playing with the thin strap. “And now that you have?”

You felt bold that night (if it wasn’t obvious prior). So, holding the jug on your hip, you brought your other hand over his; softly caressing his knuckles as you smiled. “You’re funny.”

He didn’t laugh, not even smiled. Instead, for a moment, you saw his eye grow. You pulled away from him, your stomach churning at what you had just said and done. You offended him, you must have.

“Goodnight,” your curtsied. “your grace-.”

“-Aemond.”

Now it was your turn for your eyes to enlarge.

“You may call me Aemond.”

He said it as if you would surely see him again. Taking a crisp breath, you smiled shyly. “And what if I were to call you ‘Little Prince’?”

“Perhaps when I hear you sing again, I might allow it.”

 “Then I bid you goodnight, Aemond.” You curtsied playfully, quickly turning on your heel to walk away from him.

You heard his footsteps behind you. “You have not told me your name.”

“Perhaps when you hear me sing again,” you repeated his words. “I shall give it to you.”

You expected him to follow you for the second time that night. To maybe pull you into a dark alleyway and make you tell him your name in the most pleasant way possible. Yet, you did not hear a retort as you walked back up the cobbled hill and turned on the first right to where your home was.

The sound of life soon flooded your ears as you walked through the main part of the city. Even with it being almost sunrise, there were still enough people out and about. It was only when you were nearing close to home, did the events of the night truly dawn on you.

You ran into the prince, and not only had you come out of it unharmed but also liked by him. It couldn’t possibly have been anything more than him wanting to wet his cock again (wet his cock with a girl his own age to put it more accurately, but you could never say that aloud). Despite how much the interaction thrilled and entertained you, you hoped to any gods above you wouldn’t see him again for that very reason.

Whilst turning another corner, a hooded man had tried to do the same, causing the two of you to collide. The jug fell out of your arms and crashed onto the road, the water spilling out.

“Cocksucker!” You cursed, falling to your knees.

You glanced up at the man who caused this, but he quickly pushed past you. For a moment, you thought you saw silver hair.

It was an open secret amongst the Smallfolk how…peculiar the Targaryens were.

Sighing heavily, you pulled yourself up along with the jug. When you began to walk though, you heard soft clinging from the jug. Stopping soon as you started, you glanced into the empty jug, and a faint shining momentarily blinded you. You reached in and pulled out five silver coins.

Stags…they were Stag coins.

You could pay half a years’ worth of food, a somewhat nicer place to live, clothes that were your own…but it wasn’t enough for passage on a ship, none the less, a new life.

Sliding the coins back into the jug, you continued on your way home as if nothing had happened. All the while, pondering if running into the little prince again would do more harm than good.

Not the day after you ran into Aemond, but the day after that, you were in the streets with the other smallfolk, weeping with his sister and his mother.

The same night you first met him was the same night Prince Jaeherys was beheaded. You hadn’t an idea how old he was until you watched his little body wheeled through King’s Landing. There had never been a procession like this, and the whole event made you feel ill.

It felt strange to call it an event; to have the same word used for festivals and celebrations describe a funeral. 

As you attempted to escape the crowds that were reaching out to Queen Halaena, a daunting thought dawned on you: Was it Daemon Targaryen, the traitor to the Crown, uncle and husband to Rhaenyra, that you saw the previous night?

Swallowing down the sickness that stirred within you, you decided to cauterize your doubt with work.

“You know,” one of the brothel workers, Valda, smirked. “a certain, silver-haired dragon keeps asking about you.”

Scowling, you looked at her in the mirror while sitting at the vanity, one of the other girls doing your hair. “And what have you told him?”

“I’ve told him nothing. Chansey though-.”

“-You said you wouldn’t tattle!” Chansey, after running a comb through your hair, threw  it at her.

It was dinner for most of the girls, and every one of them laughed as they ate in one of the sitting rooms.

“What did you tell him?” You interrogated.

She sighed. “When he came last night, he asked for ‘The Woman at the Well’, and if I knew your name. I said you’d have to tell him yourself, and that you left an hour before he arrived.”

“So now he knows I’m here right now.”

Valda rolled her eyes, kneeling to your height and wrapping her arms around you. “If he cared so much for you, why isn’t he here right now?”

“I don’t want to know.”

He was more than likely fucking Sylvi as you spoke.

“What did you do to the Kinslayer to make him act like this?” She jested.

There was that name people were calling him. He killed Lucerys Velaryon, son of Rhanerya and probably the reason there would be a war in the coming month. People said that the boy fell from his dragon, others said Aemond’s dragon ate him, you didn’t know at the time. All you knew was that you wanted the conversation to end.

But, Valda persisted.

“I know you’ve never lain with anyone, but I didn’t know you sucked cock like a goddess.”

“What?!” You shrieked, and the girls howled with laughter. “I did nothing of the sort!”

Chansey giggled. “Don’t tell us you let him nurse on your tits like a newborn babe.”

“…Huh?”

More giggles followed as she said. “That’s what he does to Sylvi-!”

“-Who does what to me?”

Four little words silenced the room quicker than a drawn sword would have. All eyes darted to the opened door, and Sylvi entering. She only looked at Chansey.

She swallowed thickly. “No one, Madame Sylvi.”

“I hope you aren’t shaming the activities that I or other girls have done in this house; considering you have spread your legs and filled your mouth for far longer than half of the women in this room alone.”

“I didn’t intend any harm, Madame.” She dropped her head solemnly. “Please, forgive me.”

Sylvi approached her, caressing her cheek. “All is forgiven unless I hear those ugly words from you again. That goes for the rest of you, understood?”

They nodded and mumbled their agreement. Sighing, Sylvi announced. “Take the rest of your dinner in your quarters. If any men request you, tell him to wait, you still have fifteen minutes left. I need to speak with our ‘Woman at the Well’, as the title has been given to her by the prince himself.”

The girls chuckled, offering sincere goodbyes as they passed by you before exiting. When it was only you and Sylvi, she sat down on the long couch just behind where you were sitting. She looked at you through the mirror and tilted her head. You got up and sat beside her.

“Did you get anything from last night?” She first asked.

Nodding, you took out a small pouch from your boot. “It was the man visiting from Essos.”

“The rich one or his pageboy?” She opened it, revealing two copper Star coins, and one Groat. That answered her question.

“Apparently,” you relaxed further into the couch, leaning against her. “the rich one grew a conscience and decided to go back to his wife instead of fucking Valda. Did she tell you that?”

“You know her.” She stretched her arm to hang behind you. “She doesn’t like being left dry.”

“Does anyone?” You giggled.

Sylvi lightly tugged a piece of your hair. “Don’t slouch, you’ll mess up Chansey’s hard work.”

Playfully rolling your eyes, you sat up. “It’s already dark, is there someone waiting for an innocent woman at a well?”

She shook her head. “No, not that I’ve heard of now, but tonight, perhaps. There’s so much talk of war, I’m feeling ill already thinking of it. Still, it will bring fortune for the both of us.”

“I suppose so.” You sighed, leaning forward.

Her hand came up to stroke your back, her finger trailing your spine. “Is it true you still haven’t fucked anyone?”

“Sylvi!” You laughed.

“Is it wrong I find it hard to believe?!” She shoved you playfully. “You’ve done so much good for us throughout the years; I’m confident there isn’t one handsome fella who wouldn’t want to bed you. Or one of the ladies, if you prefer.”

“I’m alright.” You had told her that a hundred times prior, and you felt as if you would tell her a hundred times more.

She sighed. “Suit yourself. Come back in an hour or two, we should have someone drunk on cunt for you to sedate.”

“Of course.”

You dusted yourself off and stood, heading to the door. Sylvi called your name, and you turned.

“I don’t want you speaking with the prince.” Her face was sullen. “You shouldn’t have to deal with his burdens.”

Nodding, you opened the door. “Tell him to leave me be if he asks again; I don’t want to deal with him either.”

You had decided on not wanting to see him again; even if he gave you a hundred Dragons (…that’s a lie, you would).

So, after wandering around King’s Landing for another hour, sticking close to the well-lit parts of the city and almost enjoying the merry crowds, you went back to the brothel, changed into your thin dress, and applied a light coat of makeup. Valda had been with a boy who turned two and twenty that night; friendless, wanted to do something extraordinary to celebrate his name day, and she had been the first person who made him cum. He didn’t even get to slip his cock in her, he was so overwhelmed.

She said he was sweet; you almost felt bad as you spotted him whilst preparing around the corner.

You began to sing the same song you sang every other night, carrying the jug on your hip. You were bolder that night knowing he was more innocent than you, so you glanced over your shoulder and beckoned him closer.

As you sat on the well, letting the bucket lower, you could feel the boy’s presence grow stronger. When you finished your song, you finally looked at him, grinning from ear to ear. Then, your eyes fell to a figure in the alleyway behind him.

“Does your mother know you’re here, boy?”

Said boy turned to look over his shoulder and was met with the face of a hooded one-eyed man, grinning like the devil. The boy’s jaw quivered and only stammers escaped. Aemond walked closer to him.

“What did you think would happen tonight?” He taunted. “You’d come up behind her and fuck her senseless?”

“N-no, I-I-!”

“-Leave us.”

The trembling boy said nothing more; only kept his head down and walked quickly away from the well. Rolling your eyes, you drew them away from the prince once it was only the two of you.

“You’re welcome.”

‘You’re welcome’ he said.

You looked back at him, your face falling into disgust. “What do I have to be thankful for?”

“I assumed you didn’t take pleasure luring little boys night after night.” He sat beside you. “Seems like a chore.”

“It’s worse.” You sighed, cranking the water bucket up. “It’s a job; something us smallfolk need.”

He snickered. “You believe I’ve never worked a day in my life.”

“For coin? Yes.”

“Is there anything else you do for work? Or are you just a siren?”

You looked at him, halting yourself. “Why did you pay me that night?”

He shrugged. “You gave me a service.”

“Someone to talk to?”

“Entertainment.”

Leaning against the wooden post of the well, you asked. “So will you pay me in gold this time? Considering you entertained yourself so much I lost a quarry?”

“We’ll see.” He stood up and placed his hand on the crank.

Humming, you stood as well, turning your whole body to him. “And no, I don’t just do this.”

“What do you do?”

“I usually tailor, sometimes look after children; many odd jobs.”

“Where do you tailor?”

You smirked. “Try asking me later.”

He took the bucket off its hook once it appeared. “I won’t, if you tell me your name.”

“How much coin do you have for that?”

“You didn’t have to pay for my name.”

“I already knew who you were.”

“Well, then you didn’t have to pay for the privilege to use it.” He poured the water into your jug.

You shrugged. “You made me lose a quarry, so…”

Aemond rolled his eye, but you could still see a smirk playing on his lips as he reached into his pocket and took out three silver coins; Moons. Your own eyes grew, and like a greedy child, you instantly stretched your hand out to grasp them. He was quicker, holding them closer to his chest.

“Ah, ah, ah, your name, and something else…”

That’s what made you lose interest. You forced yourself to stand taller, but your heart was trying to beat itself out of your chest and run away in terror.

“I’m not going to…to…”

He tilted his head, mimicking you. “To…to do what?”

“How plainly am I allowed to speak to you?”

“As if you were my own brother.”

“I’m not going to fuck you.” You forced out. “And I won’t let you do that to me either.”

Aemond chuckled, shaking his head. “Is there a difference?”

“Out of the both of us, you’re the only one who’s been in a pleasure house for its intended purpose. I thought you would know.”

“And you have thought correctly.” He pocketed the coins. “I don’t wish for that; only a walk.”

You furrowed your brow. “To where?”

“Nowhere, just around King’s Landing.”

This was stranger than the first night. The coins were meant to be found after you left, but now there he was, paying you directly for a service. He more than likely had his fill with Sylvi earlier, and after you first mentioned him to the girls, one of them let it slip that Madame Sylvi was the only woman he pleasured himself with.

So, despite how much he would deny it, Prince Aemond Targaryen was paying you to be a friend.

And damn it all, even though you had a feeling it would all end in tears, you couldn’t stop yourself from giving him your name.

[inconveniently-discorporated]

My heart hurts so bad for Aziraphale because I can honestly just relate to him so, so, so much.

(not putting this one under a cut so warning season 2 ahead, I'll tag it at the bottom too)

Aziraphale says, "Nothing lasts forever," but I don't believe for a second he doesn't wish that it did.

He WANTS things to go back to how they used to be. He WANTS the seraphic Crowley squealing with joy as he cranks up the universal machine and sets the stars aflame. He WANTS there to be no sides, he WANTS to believe in the idea of the host united, he WANTS to go back before Crowley got himself in trouble by asking questions. He wants, I think, to be in that moment of creation and adoration forever.

Change seems to frighten him. There's an aspect of uncertainty. There's an element of chaos, the loss of control. I understand this deeply. And what the Metatron offered him was just that: certainty, control, the ability to dictate his own narrative.

I used to be in a toxic job. On top of it, I had intense anxiety and other undiagnosed neurodivergencies that made it even harder to fit in and understand the untold rules I was supposed to follow to get along. When I first got there, it wasn't so bad -- perhaps I was, like Aziraphale, also a bit idealistic. Then there were some changes that brought instability, significant more anxiety, and a lot of nights spent agonizing over my lack of control over it all.

My friends and significant other tried to convince me to leave, but I didn't want to. I didn't know what else was out there. I didn't know if it would be worse. I didn't know what kind of stability it would have.

Then my manager left, so that spot opened up. I had worked there for a long time, and honestly, I never saw myself going into management. I didn't think I could. I wasn't sure I even wanted to. All of that extra stress, on me? Not to mention, getting FURTHER into the job that was taking a massive toll on me? But then...

Then I would have control. Then I could run things the way *I* had always thought they should run. I wouldn't need to worry about who would replace my manager and whether my life would be a living hell -- I would make it what I wanted it to be. Upper management was really pushing for it, so I applied.

To make a long story short: I don't think it went very well. I didn't have the support I needed. I didn't have the emotional skills I needed. I think I did my best, but I'm not fond of those times. At the time, I was SURE that I wanted to move up even more, I was SURE this would make it all better. I thought this was what I REALLY wanted.

But that's not what I needed. What I needed was to get out, and eventually I did. Even as ready as I was to leave, it was absolutely agonizing. I could barely stand to handle the unknown. I was going to work together with my spouse, actually, and I was so excited for that, but I still... I still was upset and worried sick over the dramatic change that would befall my life, after I had made the decision to leave.

That's where I can relate to Aziraphale. I wonder what would've happened if, before I had actually left for good, the head honchos had come up to me and said, "We want to keep you -- how about we offer you (an even higher position)?" -- would I have said no, or would I have wanted to make a difference?

Funny, I said exactly that, too. That's almost why I didn't change jobs in the first place. I said, "But I feel like I'm really making a difference with what I'm doing now." But what pushed me over the edge was realizing that none of that mattered to them, it was all about THEIR control of ME, not the other way around.

I'm so intensely curious to see what happens with Aziraphale next, but I'm sure he will learn what Crowley understands: nothing lasts forever, and sometimes it's good that it doesn't -- even if sometimes we wish it did.

[aimasup]

Spoilers for The March 2024 Welcome Home Update, LONG post warning:

The Eddie Scene

Let's establish two realities: The Neighbourhood (theirs) and The Show (the humans').

(The third is ours, here, actually real, no black gunk and Welcome Home is just a really cool fictional horror project. Irrelevant, just wanted to bring us down to earth)

I like to believe it's an unaware Wreck-It-Ralph situation: The Neighbourhood exists as The Show because that's how they live and what they were created for.

They have a happy home in the commercials and episodes, interviews with humans and playfully leaning on the fourth wall (via Narrator). And when Playfellow Workshop had a really good influential show, they quite literally brought these puppets to life, perhaps too much.

That's where the trouble comes in; we don't know if the puppets being sentient was ever revealed to the public, or what the black rot even is yet. Personally I can't really even guess how much the other puppets know at the moment, not even Home. All we know is that Wally was the first to 'wake up', likely.

So I'm just gonna say what I think about the Eddie segment at the end of the commercial compilation from his perspective alone (bravo to the voice actors and artists my god).

The Neighbourhood...

The Show.

Here's what I assume: both in the Neighbourhood and The Show, Eddie is being given a break from working so hard. Because I believe the script/special was supposed to end here:

Eddie Dear was happy.

[calm jazz music as the title card fades in] And a Happy Homewarming to one and all! Ho Ho Ho!!

End.

Because it makes no sense why The Show staff would spend extra resources to give the puppet Not Quirky Anxiety and end their Christmas special on a worrying note for general audiences.

I think The Show staff wrapped up that scene and left to go check on the rest of the set or something, and the Eddie puppet was left there, alone in Wally's room set because its job is done. Except it isn't, and Eddie became aware somehow.

He sees Home, his friend, and something isn't right

I don't know what this is: my first thought was that it was Home's hand crank, and Eddie was seeing but not understanding the puppets behind the scenes

"Sources say, however, that this puppet’s (Home's) eyes could move through a hand crank on the other side of the prop facing away from the camera."

-(welcomehomerestorationproject.net)

His friend's eyes look dead but they're moving, I thought. But looking at it again, it looks more like a microphone stand a Show staff is holding? Some sort of set equipment. Speaking of the set

Wally's room is too big and leads to nowhere. Is this a visual representation for Eddie's mental state? Did they literally turn the lights off on set? Or can he not see everything right now because his poor fictional brain can't handle our reality just yet?

His hands are fuzzy but there's something in them. Something was under his skin just now. They don't feel like his hands.

"Eddie was a live-hand puppet who required two puppeteers to operate."

-(welcomehomerestorationproject.net)

I imagine he's in a limbo of awareness, he's seeing so many things and not quite understanding what they are, and he's getting more lost and panicked

Can you imagine how overstimulating it must be to go from a clean, happy children's fantasy reality to a world with the laws of physics?

The clock's ticking doesn't quiet down and it's constant. He's sweating when nothing is wrong (?). Gravy was poured on the tree ornament, he's always helped do that, but now it's dripping onto the floor and it's making a gross mess. Little things like that don't have consequences unless the script calls for it. Eddie doesn't know that, and especially he's freaked out by the breathing and the heartbeat.

Maybe it's Home's, or his own, or both, idk.

What's curious is that Frank and Sally are fine and talking about the day's events. This means that Eddie should've been fine after the episode too, relaxed like normal, but he didn't get to. He probably didn't even know when they got there or when Sally left.

This image right here? I think it symbolises the scary clash between both realities by now.

2 (Eddie and Wally) or 4 (counting Sally and Home) out of 9 neighbours being aware is too many. Frank wasn't supposed to have to comfort Eddie. The episode was supposed to end and Eddie can see all of it.

(and yeah maybe romance is an additional factor here)

We don't know if people remember seeing this scene on their televisions. Maybe the episode ended as normal for them. The cameras weren't rolling, so currently, we only get to witness the puppets' descent into decay because someone behind the television is Letting The Neighbourhood In, bit by bit.

Maybe we'll get to see all the other puppets go through the same awareness crisis as the website keeps updating. Personally, I don't think there's an ulterior motive for Home, nor do I think any of the puppets are under strict supervision to behave a certain way for filming episodes, like celebrities.

What freaks me out is that they banter with the narrator and do commercials for real products. They're aware of the fourth wall but only because the fourth wall let them be aware. And it even got me thinking about the nature of existing as a concept (they're fictional characters. they don't really exist? Not in the same way individual humans do anyway. They aren't really supposed to belong to themselves.)

Sorry this turned into ramble rubbish, these are just my thoughts, could be entirely wrong about everything. Welcome Home is just super neat and the amount of effort gone into it shows. Lemme know what yall think, kudos if you read this far

For your troubles 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪🍯🥛🍵☕🍶

Extra note: I don't think they require the puppeteers to function outside of episodes either. They just live their lives chilling, don't even know there's a Show. Maybe there's an explanation but for now I'm content with 'it's magic'.

That being said I've seen other theories about the peas and the isolation of Eddie specifically those are real neat

[bluntblade]

Realised that this never posted, but I stand by it:

It's really weird that Rogue One's aesthetic, which was specifically developed for a Star Wars film which had minimal space wizards and was instead about much more subdued characters and murkier moral themes, has now become the aesthetic which gets slathered over all new live-action Star Wars whether it fits or not.

If you step back, Rogue One isn't just very different to the Saga movies either side of it, it's pretty damn different to what came back, what with the modern war movie influences. It's working to portray how the Galaxy often feels outside the saga, and the visuals are part of that.

Mando mostly works with the same look because while there are some big personalities, they're almost all side characters, while the mains are stoic and reserved except for Grogu (who's the only wizard regular). Andor looks downright great, not least as much of it is shot on actual locations and on full sets.

But apply this to Ahsoka and Kenobi, and it rather cuts against the vibe they're going for. Space wizards, with their operatic cosmic conflicts and connection to a mystic energy, tend to want something a bit more heightened (which I think is an under-discussed problem in the PT which is very muted much of the time, and a major strength in the more stylised Empire and TLJ). The colours are muted, the angles mostly flat, and it ends up being at odds with the story being told.

To extend Kenobi some goodwill, lots of the latter seems to have come from the Volume. You keep seeing where the cinematographer wanted to crank a shot of Vader to be sharper and more impactful, but couldn't because the Volume doesn't permit that. Although I do think there are some baffling bits of blocking like in the chase and the first duel, the floaty shaky-cam is a generally poor look and really, Lucasfilm shouldn't lean so hard on the Volume (I mean, seriously guys, look at Monarch. That looks miles better than anything you've done on TV except for Andor.) But point is, they tried and ran into constraints.

Meanwhile Ahsoka seems exceedingly comfortable with both feet in Gordon Willis' metaphorical bucket of cement. The characters' energy levels are tamped way down from Rebels to match the muted presentation, and things often feel low-energy even just within the context of these shows. Even when the show steps into the World Between Worlds, an explicitly supernatural plane (or goes into Ahsoka's coma dream) there's no real change in look. Contrast the way that Empire employs that low shutter speed in the dark cave, while TLJ steps into something surreal complete with voiceover and an impossible CG camera move. In Ahsoka, though, there's little attempt to make the place feel otherworldly beyond how the scenery looks.

And these are largely missing a vital part of Rogue One's look, which is scale. Both Gareth Edwards and cinematographer Greig Fraser are great at portraying large-scale things in interesting ways, and that's something which will tend to get lost with a move to the small screen and the massive use of the Volume, without shots from locations or physical sets to balance it out and make spaces feel more real. Without that, the Mandoverse keeps feeling... rather pokey.

[stardropsaloongossiptrain]

Bachelor/ettes and Cooking

Gonna rank how I think the marriage candidates would do in the kitchen

----

Bachelors:

Elliott -- it takes a while, but once the man has a real kitchen at his disposal and some encouragement to try, I think he would really enjoy cooking and could be very good at it! I HC him as growing up in a wealthy home where he probably wasn't allowed to cook for himself, and then the cabin has nothing... but he remembers dishes he really enjoyed. I like to think he starts cooking just trying to help out once he moves to the farm, and there is DEF a learning curve... but there's a master chef hiding in there. I can feel it.

Alex -- you do not grow up with Grannie Evelyn and not learn how to cook. Impossible. Now, he's not a fancy chef by any means, but he can make a meal without issue. If you get this man a grill, he will 1000% become Grill Master, Kiss the Cook apron wearing Grill Dad. Also, though he rarely does it, he can bake up a storm. Generally only bakes for birthdays.

Harvey -- He can cook, but only cooks healthy meals. He will need to be taught that it's okay to season your food. Brown rice, steamed veggies, and plain tofu/ chicken breasts type guy. Otherwise, it's pre-packaged frozen food. Maybe he can get better w/ encouragement but he's always going to be checking portions and making sure you eat plenty of fruits and vegetables and watch your sodium intake. The most likely bachelor to be vegetarian/ be willing to go vegetarian. Gets nauseated if he's preparing meat.

Shane -- Mid-tier like Harvey, but even though he's had kitchen access he rarely feels like cooking. He knows what seasoning is-- his usual cooking style is the exact opposite of Harvey, mostly family recipes. All flavor, calorie count who?? Loves making food covered in cheese, sauce, or gravy. His chili would win awards, but he only makes it once a year.

Sam -- He could keep himself alive if the box has directions. Anything more complicated than boxed mac and cheese, though, and he gets a little lost. Can help YOU in the kitchen very well, but to be honest he would rather be doing something more exciting.

Sebastian -- The only one who is a worse cook than him is Abigail. He is NOT allowed in the kitchen even to watch. Could burn iced tea.

---

Bachelorettes

Emily -- Oldest sister + working at the Saloon added together means she's definitely going to be a decent cook, but she genuinely enjoys cooking. She loves to experiment with different cultural dishes. She only cooks vegetarian or vegan dishes.

Penny -- She's pretty self sufficient. I don't think she knows too many recipes, but she enjoys experimenting if she moves to the farmhouse. She's very adapt at stretching a budget, and I think she would enjoy making jams/ pickles. Not the big amount the farmer does, but small batches in special flavors.

Leah -- She's a simple cook. She prefers raw dishes, or things like buddha bowls. A lot of texture and flavor. Loves using herbs and edibles from foraging locally. Leans vegetarian but doesn't mind fish from time to time.

Maru -- Maru is proficient at cooking, but I think takes after her dad too much and is very nutrient focused vs what actually makes a good meal. Occasionally makes questionable decisions in the name of efficiency. Could go from making some sort of casserole if busy w/ a project to Extremely Experimental if she has the time. No in between.

Haley -- I considered putting her higher but no. She has rarely if ever had to cook for herself before, so if she's at the farmhouse she will be surprised if you expect her to do anything in the kitchen. Eventually I think she could be fine. It's not hard. She just hates doing dishes. Enjoys baking somewhat, especially w/ Alex.

Abigail -- She eats rocks as a snack and thinks if you just crank the oven to 600 for fifteen minutes it's better than 350 for an hour. Her stomach is alien to this world. Can and will eat anything without issue.

[lyra-r05e]

Happy Friday! Instead of a chapter teaser this week, I have a bonus chapter instead 🤭

This is how Seb's 8 heart event fits into my story, What Friends are For.

Chapter 14 - Move to the Music will be posted Sunday, Oct 27.

Wash over me

Late Spring, Year 1

What am I doing with my life.

The rain falls heavier as you drag a wagon full of fishing supplies and an empty chest across the cobblestones of the town square. With the weak sun finally leaving the horizon behind dark clouds, visibility is extra poor. You readjust the hood of your rain jacket, annoyed by the vibration of the wagon handle as you roll over the rough terrain. It's going to be worse dragging this thing through the sand, too.

You came to the farm to be a farmer, not a fisher. But crops don't just grow overnight. A fact so obvious, but somehow one you overlooked when starting your journey here. So here you are, trying to make ends meet between harvests by chasing fish that only come out in the rain. Additionally, you need at least one eel from the ocean for the community centre.

And eels only like the nighttime, according to Willy. It's not like you have anything better to do. Staying up as late as possible will only help make the extra cash you desperately need. So long as you don't pass out, of course.

As you lug the wagon from the sand to the dock, your relief is thwarted by the realization that it'll only be ten times harder to do this with a full load on the way home. With a heavy sigh, the wheels clunk along the boards of the dock.

“Farmer?”

You gasp sharply, dropping the handle of your wagon. It bangs loudly on the docks as it bounces off the wood, matching the thumping of your heart as your whole body jolts in surprise.

Sebastian is sitting at the edge of the dock, legs dangling off the edge. His typical black clothing fully camouflaged him from your view. He looks over his shoulder, pale features barely visible. He's just sitting there, in his hoodie. Getting absolutely soaked.

“Shit, you scared me!” You lean down to pick up the handle, moving a few paces closer to him.

“Hey,” you can make out his light smirk, amused by your reaction, "I'm surprised to find you out here in the rain.”

“I could say the same to you. Are you okay?”

“Oh. Yea…are you?”

“Now that my heart rate has calmed down, yes,” you chuckle lightly. “I don't think I've seen you this far south before.”

“Yea, I'm not much of an outdoor person,” he smiles softly.

“What, uh…whatcha up to?” It's a little awkward, standing over him. You debate sitting next to him so he doesn't have to crank his neck to talk to you.

“I actually like this weather. It makes everyone else disappear, you know? Then I can enjoy the beach alone,” he stares back out at the dark clouds over the horizon.

“Ah. Sorry to bother you,” you start wheeling your wagon back up the docks, taking the hint.

“Wait! That's not what I meant, sorry,” he winces. When you turn back to look at him, he pats the dock beside him for you to join him.

You haven't really spent much time alone with Sebastian. Now that you think about it, you've never really talked with just him. Not that you don't talk to him lots, it's just always between Sam, Abigail or both of them. Even the few times you've gone to his house, it's always to talk with his mom. It would be nice to get to know him a little more, without the influence of others.

You sit next to him, tucking your knees to your chest and covering them with your raincoat. You join him in staring out at the horizon for a few moments, listening to the rain fall hard around you.

“So…what are you up to?” He turns slightly to ask you, breaking the silence.

“I'm trying to catch an eel. They only come out at night when it's raining, and they won't be here when summer comes. Gotta seize the moment, you know?” You hug your knees tight, giving him a soft grin.

“Yea? What do you want an eel for?”

You tense up slightly, hoping he doesn't catch your hesitation. The Junimos want it to fix the aquarium.

“I haven't caught one yet. I'm a completionist,” you say with a cheeky grin.

“I respect that,” he gives you a crooked grin, squinting his eyes as he smiles.

You don't see him smile like that often, he's usually brooding or mildly annoyed. But when you do…it warms your heart. It's so genuine, so…cute. It's too dark for him to see the blush that rose to your cheeks at the thought.

Get it together, Farmer. You barely know him, and he's one of the few people here who you might be able to call a friend. You brush away those thoughts from your mind, telling yourself it's just loneliness catching up to you. You've never thought of him, or anyone in town for that matter, as more than that. You just got here, and have barely settled in.

“Aren't you cold?” You look him up and down briefly. The rain isn't letting up anytime soon.

“Not yet. We’re getting soaked, aren't we…” he reaches into his hoodie pocket, pulling out an umbrella. He turns away from you to open it, then holds it up above both of you as best he can. “Here. There's room for two,” he shuffles a little closer to you, motioning for you to do the same.

You really don't need an umbrella, but the gesture is nice. You scoot closer to him, and lift your hood off as he readjusts the umbrella to be more comfortable.

The rhythmic drops bouncing off the umbrella adds to the calming white noise of the storm. Thunder rumbles in the distance where the looming dark clouds roll in over the horizon. You sit with him in silence for a while, content enjoying the moment.

He sighs, barely audible over the noise, and leans a little closer into you. You reciprocate the extra pressure, shoulders pressed firmly against each other. He must be cold, but the extra warmth from your body heat takes the chill off.

“Do you like this weather?” He breaks the silence.

“I don't mind it, mostly. I don't have to water my crops when it rains,” you tilt your head towards him with a grin.

“That's nice,” he returns your grin, then stares back out at the ocean. “For some reason, staring off into the bleak horizon makes me feel…I dunno. Like it's worthwhile to keep pushing on, I guess.”

Your heart pangs at the statement, confirming your suspicions about his poor mental health. He always seems…sad. Lonely.

“I get it. The rain is calming. Weather like this - rain, snow, thunder, heavy winds - it always reminds me how little I can control. Puts things into perspective, you know?” You hug your knees tighter, glancing at him briefly.

“Yea…Sorry for the depressing topic,” he smiles softly.

“Not everything has to be sunshine and rainbows,” you smirk at him, and he chuckles lightly.

“Being around people makes me feel anxious…” he starts tentatively, then meets your eyes. “I don't feel that way around you, though.”

“I'm glad to hear that,” you smile, leaning into him playfully. “You know…I'm always here if you need someone to talk to. I want to be better friends with you. If you want that, that is,” your confidence falters, and you glance away from his dark eyes.

“Thanks, Farmer,” he smiles warmly.

You lift up your hood again, moving out from the umbrella. “Are you ok if I cast this line?” You motion to your fishing rod.

“Of course,” he watches calmly as you stand, setting up your fishing gear.

To your delight, it doesn't take long for the fish to bite. You stand beside him, catching a bunch of eel and a few halibut. Sebastian cheers you on whenever you get a bite.

You stay chatting on the docks long past midnight, until it gets too cold for either of you to ignore. You wish him a safe walk home as you pack up and brace yourself for the long trek home. It's sad, watching him go. The silent void of loneliness returns as he leaves your view.

[raguonmynieceandnephew]

I fucking love Shadowlands and I am tired of being silent

This is probably gonna be long. TL;DR at the end.

Look, Shadowlands is the second worst expansion this game has ever shipped, besides WoD. I know this is a WILD opening sentence for a defense argument, but I am a romantic, not fucking delusional. This is a fact. Point blank period. The content drought was absurd, the legendary system was completely fucked, the maw in general, the lore reduced Arthas and Garrosh quite literally to dust, The Jailer as the main villain and FUCKING THORGAST, the overall alt unfriendliness, borrowed power cranked to a million, and I have expressed how much of a fucking joke I think putting Pelagos as the new Arbriter was.

It was bad.

This has been stablished, not just by me, but by the entirety of the wow community.

But even though I agree, all these things made the game worse, I still enjoyed my experience, and I have a positive outlook on the expansion overall, which seems to be the greatest sin a World of Warcraft player can commit: I liked Shadowlands. I dare to say I liked it more than I did Dragonflight, if I think really hard about it.

You simply cannot say you liked Shadowlands in the any circle of the WoW community online, from what I have seen. I remember Kraken Latte put it in first place in a rank she made of all expansions and got shit on for days on twitter, with people failing to see what she saw in the game.

Now, I feel like I have pointlessly yapping till now, so without further ado, here are some of the Shadowlands features i like the most:

1 - THREADS OF FATE

I am a simple man, who likes to do 2 things in wow: Mythic+ and leveling. That is pretty much it. I don't PvP, I rarely raid and I occasionally indulge in RPing as a Tidesage on Moonguard. And let me tell you, this baby right here was lifechanging.

Threads of Fate is by far, the single best feature (before Warbands, lol) in my entire World of Warcraft experience. I loved it. I loved it dearly. I don't think I have ever had so much fun leveling 60-70 through Revendreth and Ardenweald with ToF. I still have the route I took memorized, it was SO good. So many bonus objectives back to back to back, world quests and that goddamn gorgeous blue forest had the FATTEST questing hubs in the game.

I was so excited to play this combined with Chromie Time, like IT WAS ON BETA, until it was ruthlessly taken away from me for no goddamn reason AT ALL. Like, what the actual fuck blizzard. Y'all don't understand how delightful it would have been to level like that in ardenweald in the mid thirty levels, right after clearing Loch Modan (or the Silverspine and Hillsbrad, for horde). I barely touched SL since it got removed.

BRING IT BACK BLIZZARD, I AM BEGGING YOU, JUST DO THIS ONE SOLID FOR ME.

2 - COVENANT CALLINGS

Speaking of features I thoroughly enjoyed that were pried from my hands, we have the best iteration of daily quests this game has ever had. They actually worked as good dailies that gave actual gold, was a good reliable source of reputation and was amazing for anima and cosmetics.

This + the recent nerfs to the Dragonracing WQs make me feel like blizzard doesn't like when players make their gold independently, like, jesus christ not all of us have time to be profession moguls.

3 - THE 4 ZONES

What inspired this post was the fact that SL raids are now on legacy loot (if you didn't know, now you do) and I had to go to Bastion to buy the weapons with the thingy that drops from Nathria and...look at this. Just look at this.

This place is one of the most beautiful things this game has to offer. Like, the entire zone is gorgeous byt seeing this for the first time since DF came out legit moved me bro, LOOK AT IT.

And while the covenants were kind of a shit show gameplay-wise, in EVERY SINGLE OTHER ASPECT, it was a 10/10 feature, argue with your mom. Aesthetics, themes, everything, simply gorgeous. Also, it got bonus points from me bcs i really do not like to use training dummies in current expansions because of the sheer amount of people blasting them at any given time, so each covenant having their own Dummy Room, was a ++++ for me.

4 - THE NECROLORDS OF MALDRAXXUS

The Necrolords were the best covenant, their campaign was the best and their characters were the best. Like, come on now.

Draka? Mother. Vashj? Mother. Emeni? Mother. Sin'dane? Mother Stradama? Grandmother. Like, are you kidding me? I know lore was one of the Weakest points of SL overall, but you are insane if you include anything involving these guys. Even the Korthia campaign was enjoyable when they had the spotlight. And I only listed the female characters lmao, don't forget The Primus, Krexus's meme death, the five houses, Morgraine, Grahmal, Marileth, like C'MON!

5 - THE DUNGEONS

Except for the Theater of Pain, and arguably the De Other Side (I personaly love it), Shadowlands has the best overall roster of dungeons in the entire game.

Sanguine Dephts is, in my opinion the second best dungeon in WoW, period, behind only Freehold, Tazavesh is the best Mega Dungeon they ever made. Mists is a banger, Plaguefall is a banger except for the tentacles, Halls of Atonement, Spires (controversial take, ik), Necrotic Wake is amazing, like, you can say whatever you want about SL, but you cannot talk shit about its dungeon design.

Except ToP.

Fuck ToP.

Now, it's getting late so imma speedrun the rest of the items:

6 - COSMETICS

SL changed the transmog game, and all cosmetics from it (all the mounts and sets from all sources) look phenomenal, and if you disagree you are simply lying to yourself.

7 - ZERETH MORTIS

The zone was good and had tons of stuff to do and collect, plus, the introduction to the Catalysts was a plus.

also, nothing will be funnier than Taelia fucking Fordragon being the talking quest bubble for WQs in THE REALM OF ULTRA DEATH

8 - RAIDS

CN: Vibes? Immaculate. SoD: Horrible systems, cool mechanics SoFO: Cool systems, mid mechanics overall a positive for me

9 - CHARACTERS

Already mentioned a lot of characters from Maldraxxus, here are my other faves: Lady Moonberry, the gay unicorm, Denathrius, Theothar, basically ever steward, The Accuser, Kael'thas, General Draven, Remornia and many more.

There are probably more reasons to list to justify my love for SL despite all the bad it has in it, but I simply do not have the mental fuel to keep going rn, i need sleep.

TL;DR: I like Shadowlands despite it being bad and would appreciate it if ppl didn't throw a fit everytime someone talks about it in any sort of positive light. I then listed Threads of Fate, Callings, the first 4 zones, dungeon design, the fuckton of collectibles, characters and the beginning of the shift in game philosophy as positive and valid reasons to be a SL enjoyer.

[justwearthegoddamncardigan]

Can you write platonic gladers x child reader (8 - 10), like when their in the scorch trials

AHHH I've been thinking about writing a platonic fic for so long but I wasn’t sure if anyone would read!!!! This request is so good thank you so much

The Heart

Gladers x child! gender neutral! reader (platonic)

Set during scorch trials (movieverse)

Notes: I decided to format this as headcanons to make it easier. Where Teresa is 'The Traitor', Newt is 'The Glue', etc, reader is tattooed with 'The Heart'. This isn't really in the story, just a note for the title and a general headcanon

Warnings: everything that happened in the movie, i.e. violence, Cranks, Winston shooting himself, and one instance of bad language cause apparently I don't have other vocab

Aris

You meet Aris when you've all escaped from WCKD

He's a nice guy

When you're gathering supplies in that abandoned building he picks out a bunch of little sweaters for you

Idk I get a sweater vibe from him

You wear the sweaters when it's night time in the Scorch, and freezing cold

In the days when it's too hot to wear them Aris carries them in his backpack for you

But that's really the extent of your interactions

You've just had more time to build up trust with the people of your own Glade, so it's easier with them, but you're still chill with Aris

Winston

You didn't really know Winston back in the Glade

But it still hurts when the Cranks get him

He shields you away, not letting you see his wound when he shows the others

The Gladers help him do the same, hiding you from him when he starts looking worse

It's like there's some silent pact between everyone to protect you from seeing as many bad things

Your age seems to make them want to preserve your innocence, or something

Anyway, he always looks after you, until the end

RIP Winston :(

Frypan

He always had a soft spot for you back in the Glade

(everyone did)

That kindness doesn't stop when you're out in the Scorch

He always makes sure you've eaten, and he even offers you some of his food, even though he probably needs more than you

Frypan does his best to keep the mood light for you, cracking little jokes and pulling faces to make you smile

Teresa

For Teresa, you're actually a reminder of what the world was like

Look, we all know Teresa betrayed the group, and that was really shitty

But we can get her motivations sometimes

She looks at you and sees the people she should be saving, the people she wants to protect

You're actually a symbol of hope in her mind

She wants to make a cure so that people like you can live in a world without the Flare

Of course, you would rather she just not betray all your friends, but that's just how her mind works

For you, she's kinda like an older sister... or a mother (lol)

You always sleep beside her at night, and she'll hold your hand while sleeping so you don't have nightmares

Thomas

Thomas is actually kind of a role model to you

You admire his relentless no-one-left-behind mindset, and his bravery

He doesn't really have time to look after you like the others, but you always fuel his spirit with your unfailing optimism

He makes the most time with you at the end of the day, when you're resting

He comforts you when you're scared at night, staying awake to talk to you about simple things, or to tell you a story to take your mind off your fears

You cuddle up to sleep between him and Teresa, giving both of them some calm and peace, since you can tell his mind is always moving a million miles a minute

He's kinda like Teresa with you, actually

They both look at you as a hopeful future, something they have to work towards to protect you

But the difference is that Thomas works to get you and the rest of the group to a safe place, while Teresa... you know, gives you all up

Newt

You trigger some strange memories in Newt

He doesn't really remember, but he had a sister before

You remind him of what it's like to be an older brother

He protects you like his own sibling, making sure you get your sweaters from Aris' bag when it gets cold

He also defends you first when you end up at Jorge's warehouse

When the guard people are closing in on you, he shoves you behind him and threatens to kill anyone who touches you

Obviously they have guns and are stronger than the lot of you, so all you end up getting strung up by your feet

But hey, he tried his best, and it was all fine in the end

Minho

Minho is your favourite

(you're his favourite too)

He's snarky and to-the-point with everyone else, but he's always soft with you

Back in the Glade he'd always let you sit in the Runners' hut and chill out, just drawing pictures or messing around with sticks from the Map

Some days when it gets late, you get tired from walking and Minho will give you a piggyback ride

Usually you'll fall asleep on Minho's back like that, and he'll have to gently put you down, trying not to wake you

Minho's actually always carrying you

Like, in the hard situations - it becomes a regular thing

Some bad shit going down? Get on my back

He's carrying you when you're running in to the warehouse, and you almost get struck by lightning with him

Back when you were escaping the Maze, he was carrying you there too

Hope you enjoyed these :)))

Thank you for reading, and requests are open as always ❤

[unsteady-calcium]

Ok, I'm mid season 7 now, and I’ve had a moment to collect my thoughts. Fair warning, this is rambling...

To me, most of seasons 6 and 7 is great actually.

I like Booth’s anger and rage. I get why people don’t, but I do. I think it’s not only understandable and in character and makes me feel empathetic towards him; I actually think it’s a damn interesting narrative choice, and makes Booth a more real character than he has been before.

And I love Brennan’s fear, too. She develops so much, and her "fall back on rationality as a defence mechanism" armour is finally starting to crack. It's damn fascinating to watch.

I like that the two of them had real, emotional, character-driven obstacles to overcome, before they can be together. And that identifying those obstacles doesn't automatically mean that they've overcome them at the same time. It stays true to their characters and the journey they’ve been on together so far, instead of some half-assed “I have to focus on Parker” or “crime solving takes up too much time to try to have relationships”, which most TV couples are reduced to when trying to keep up the tension. I love that they gradually overcame the fear and the rage, their small victories and choices adding up to something big. They rebuilt the trust and faith that has always been their bedrock. It feels like the natural conclusion of their relationship developing for years, with the highs and lows that it has been comprised of.

Granted, the writers fumbled the ball when it came to the actual emotional resolution at the end. It could, with only a few changes, have been improved by coming at the tail end of a case which forced them to confront something about their relationship. Or the bare minimum, make it more implicit how scared they were to lose each other without having even been together first. Just, you know. Any reason why it happened when it did.

But. There’s always fanfic, I guess.

What bothers me the most is actually something else.

I feel like there’s multiple seasons missing between s6 and s7. Obviously there were pregnancy factors and all that, and my heart rejoices at B&B getting the full domestic treatment. And this is hardly a novel take - everyone seems to agree. But there is so much missing before season 7, to the degree that it’s almost hard for me to believe that these are the same characters and not... Well... Pregnancy AU, 13/13 chapters, 45k words, status: complete.

Don't get me wrong: it's a damn good pregnancy AU. They deal with a lot of stuff that is very in character. And honestly? The idea that actually, once these two overcome their fears and decide to try being together, they are rock sollid? is fair. It makes sense.

But still.

They're Booth and Brennan.

They deserved a full year of Temperance “my childhood trauma made me scared of my emotions, prone to discard reasoning based on emotions, and simultaneously desperate to, and terrified of, being part of a family” Brennan.

And a full year of Seeley “my childhood trauma makes me overcommit to romantic partners way too fast and also makes me obsessed with being a Good Man who does the Right Thing regardless of what the people involved actually want or need” Booth.

They would clash at every stage. Every label, every milestone, would be rough and every victory would be a hard-won battle. Defining what they are to each other, deciding whom to tell and when and why, moving in together, overprotectiveness, independence, trust... there is something new to tackle all the damn time.

There would be so much doubt, and so much fear, because the stakes are so high. Because they are Booth and Brennan, and if they lose this, if they lose each other, they lose everything.

And, after a year of trying their damnest to figure all this out and finally getting somewhere, the prospect of an unplanned baby would crank every single aspect of it up to 11. Brennan would be terrified of that baby. Because she wants it so much, and she wants what it means in terms of starting a family. Making something permanent. She would regress into her hyper-rational persona. Their happiness would depend on Booth recognising that, putting his own feelings to the side, and helping her through it. And we know that the more emotionally invested he is, the more he struggles with exactly that...

They would need every ounce of love and support from their friends to get through it. Every bit of faith from their found family. And that would be cathartic as hell, because forming and trusting those bonds has also been a part of the journey to get to this stage.

And they would get through it for the same reason that they have gotten this far in the first place: because despite it all, Booth and Brennan help each other to find faith, and choose to trust. They give each other the strength to risk heartbreak.

They would get through it. And it would be glorious.

Then, and only then, I would like season 7 to happen exactly the way it happened.

[spockandawe]

I'm going to have full cohesive pitches for these books as individual experiences sometime soon, i swear, but since I 1) just finished rereading thousand autumns (first time where it wasn't a third mtl), 2) am rereading peerless for the first time in years, and 3) am reading sleuth of the ming dynasty for the first time ever, I've been thinking a LOT about meng xi shi as an author and trying to scrape together my thoughts. Because I think she's really stunningly good! She's one of those authors whose skill just SHINES through, even when a translation is weak, and that's always something so fascinating to me.

But at the same time, i have a harder time raving about her books than most of my other faves. Trying to pitch thousand autumns to friends was something I really struggled with! The other two are easier, by nature of their central dynamics, while yan wushi cranks this one up to nightmare difficulty mode. But I think that it also provides an example of what I might be having to recalibrate for.

Like, I'm an easy binch. If Hua Cheng is leaving a necklace for Xie Lian early on, or Luo Binghe is noticing Shen Qingqiu's leaves right at the beginning of their books, I'm hootin and hollerin, I'm drumming my heels on the floor. And Meng Xi Shi is NOT about that instant gratification lifestyle. We're not having dessert before dinner, and there is some INTRICATE plot shit happening in all these books that is not getting muscled aside for indulgent ship time.

I'm absolutely certain it's a conscious choice, and one i respect the hell out of, especially since all of these books have the characters woven in with actual historical figures, which always manages yo take me by surprise. I assume details like keeping a wholeass imperial prince secret until he's five are fictional embellishment, but... nope! Actual history! The SCOPE of these plots and the politics they all muck around with means that there are limits to how much an author could spend time on ship bait without trivializing the central conflict. As much as i enjoyed golden stage, i never cared about the politics. And not caring about the politics in meng xi shi's work would be jettisoning SO much nutritional content.

And, that's not to say that there's NOTHING indulgent for me in the earlier parts! Yan Wushi starts delightedly letting people assume he's plowing Shen Qiao as soon as they start traveling together, Feng Xiao spends the second mystery of Peerless totally disguised as Cui Buqu's wife and fighting with him as "this wife", and Sui Zhou and Tang Fan start straight-up cohabiting POSTHASTE. And then. Meng xi shi makes you wait for it.

This isn't bad! The delayed gratification is very GOOD! The tension is delectable. The feeling of 'oh come on now you're just dragging this out on purpose' is mitigated by having characters drag things out in character. Shen Qiao's sense of responsibility pulls him towards Yan Wushi, and then away from Yan Wushi (and yan wushi is also Helping sfhfgdf). Feng Xiao doesn't move THAT fast, but Cui Buqu will Literally Die before he'll admit he has tender feelings. And Tang Fan is textually scared to lose what he has platonically with Sui Zhou by stepping into unknown territory. I'm still howling OH COME ON, but it transmutes into something directed at the characters, not the author.

And the plots we're making space for like this are hefty bois. All of them have heavy political themes, where in my usual diet, i would reluctantly accept a little politics on the side in my ancient chinese fantasy meal. And each of these books has baited me further into caring about mundane politics 😂 In Thousand Autumns, it's very much a balance between lavishly described fantasy martial arts extravaganza and big politics enhanced by the martial arts extravaganza. Peerless, we're down one martial artist in the lead characters, so there's more non-fighting politics happening (and both characters are secret police commanders), but at least one of my boys floats around playing magic music on his guqin. Fourteenth Year Of Chenghua? Goddamn, I'm reading this thing and I'm in the THROES over ancient chinese imperial office politics, like oh noooo oh my god HOW COULD THEY DEMOTE HIM AT A TIME LIKE THIS, fffff, who can possibly intercede with the emepror now-- And i have NO idea how i reached this point, this is so funny to me.

I do think it says a lot for all three of these that they won me over so hard despite not being as tailored to my personal tastes as something like mxtx! I do love all them to pieces. But it's something like... Digging in at the earlier, slower stages of these books was a hell of a struggle. One that paid off, but i worry about people bouncing off them! Something I've said about thousand autumns (and will say again) is that it's a book that asks for a lot of trust from readers. Some of that is PURELY down to yan wushi, but the structure and pace doesn't make that easy. I do think that the trust is repaid by the end, at least in terms of my reading experience, but it makes me worry! I do want people to read these!

Actually that brings me to the last big strong point I want to mention before i get back to reading: the character writing. Because GODDAMN, the character writing. It both contributes to the slow start in these books, I think, but also MASSIVELY enriches the emotional payout as they progress.

Yan Wushi is one of the funniest, most obnoxious characters of all time! He's also cruel, demanding, and overbearing, and a strong, vivid personality like that takes real time and effort to develop. The beginning of the book looks like it could slip into misery porn + stockholm syndrome healing cock = i guess this is a healthy relationship now. And it doesn't! But it's hard to tell how it WILL go, and that makes it hard to commit to a tome like this. Feng Xiao is comparably obnoxious and hilarious, but Cui Buqu is closed up tight as a clam, and both of them deal in secrets professionally, it is HARD to start accessing any hints of emotional sincerity in either of them. And Tang Fan and Sui Zhou are both junior government officials, early in their careers in a volatile work environment, and they present in a pretty reserved, professional way at first, and the subtler/goofier character notes take time and intimacy to properly manifest. wang zhi on the other hand--

I recommend these books! I really recommend them! I don't want to be underwhelming people with 'oh, you won't like it at first, but JUST YOU WAIT.' Because I did like them at first. They didnt elevete me to the same flailing emotional THROES as some novels, but the quiet rich flavor of the relationships in these are FABULOUS. And the sheer scope of the plots she pulls off, I mean, holy shit. I'm not underwhelmed by these books at all, I'm more likely to get overwhelmed, there's a reason I've been savoring the latest reading experience. I like them a lot! I like meng xi shi as a lot! In the sliver of cnovels that I've sampled, her books are doing some really cool things i haven't seen anyone else pull off, especially with such aplomb. I didn't start out LOOKING for books like that, but I'm still really, really glad i found them, and I do highly recommend them, just in general. I'll figure out how to pitch them individually soon.

*holds probably over 1.5M words of meng xi shi tomes* I Just Think She's Neat

[moodymisty]

Bad batch & tooka hybrid reader?

I had the funny idea of the bois cuddling there s/o and then there s/o randomly starts purring

I actually finished reading Neon Junkie's(NSFW) 'In the heat of the Moment' series, and that whole time I imagined reader be a cat/tookagirl-like race(hey its starwars; Anything is possible), so you sent this at the perfect time. Whether you want to be a lil'tooka or your own race is up to you readers, I kept it open <3

✦ Hunter ✦

Hunter has interacted with Lothcats before, so he was vaguely familiar with purring and other cat-like behaviors before you.

It doesn't mean that he really knows why you do the things you do however, but he just figures each one is it's own little quirk.

He internally overjoyed to have another person on board the ship that has better than human hearing he can relate to; Though it's quite a bit cuter when you hear a far away sound and you perk up than when he does.

It's not the only thing he finds cute, however.

At one point during one of their many stints in hyperspace Hunter decides to go take a rest, and walks to the back of the ship when the bunk racks are. When he looks he ends up finding you nuzzled up on his bunk, content as can be as you sleep and audibly purring even over the dull hum of the Marauder's engines.

He ends up just sleeping in the co-pilot's seat, because he feels too much like a monster at the idea of moving you. He could absolutely slip right in there beside you and you wouldn't care, but he only realizes that once it's too late. Missed a perfectly romantic moment, that.

All snuggled up as can be, the only thing better is if you'd done so on his lap. You had once, and he still thinks about it sometimes like it was some sort of ultimate honor.

Over time you end up realizing that he wants you to do that (shuffling closer and making sure his lap is perfectly flat and open), and you'll gladly take the cuddle time with just him, so you end up just getting cozy while he futzes with the navicomputer.

Next time Crosshair makes a joke he's gonna throw something at him, since he can't get up to punch him without moving

✦ Tech ✦

I hope you like being an experiment. Joking. Maybe.

In all seriousness Tech finds species that differ from humans fascinating; Particularly ones that share similar traits but at some point split away from humanity, like the Chiss.

In fact the first time you met you were bombarded with questions, though he pretty quickly leveled off with time.

He just can't help being a curious man, especially when you have so many interesting little quirks that he keeps noticing the closer he becomes with you.

Like when your ears twitch when there's a loud or interesting noise, or when you purr and get sleepy when he cranks the Marauder's climate controls to the max.

(He almost boiled everyone on board alive at one point just so you'd be happy and snug with your head on his lap taking a rest after a rough mission, enjoying the heat while everyone else was sweating buckets.)

It's research(he thinks it's adorable) he brushes it off as, while allowing you to bend the co-pilot's seat from you sitting in it sideways.

It's also a time Tech gets much more lovey dovey than you'd expect, both having a rare rest on his bunk and he gives you sweet kiss to the forehead.

✦ Wrecker ✦

Wrecker is absolutely a fan of the snuggles. It's pretty quickly that you realize Wrecker is the absolute best heat source, and if you need some, all you need to do is cuddle on up near or on him.

Even before you ended up romantic you always stood near him when you were cold, though now you just flop all over him now instead.

The first time you had done it and he heard the purring Wrecker doesn't really quite know what it is, and assumes you snore weird. It's after Tech informs him what purring is that Wrecker loses it.

You have a noise just for being happy? Besides laughing?

It's now sort of a secret goal of his when you're beside each other to get you to purr.

Which is not that hard at all, just just needs to recline back enough that you have space to get on his lap or lay on his chest, and it's game over. Especially if he kisses your cheek, then absolutely. So much love in this cockpit tonight.

Hunter hates it though, because it prevents Wrecker from wanting to do anything. He doesn't want to move you! Or himself.

Especially if you fall asleep, then it is game over. He refuses to wake you up. (He almost punched Crosshair one time when he quietly walked up beside Wrecker then clapped loud enough to startle you awake)

Wrecker is king of the snuggles, all in all. You win the jackpot with this man.

✦ Crosshair ✦

Crosshair is an ass, at first. Who's surprised.

You remember not fondly when he snuck up on you and scared you, causing every hair on your body to stand on end.

He found it hilarious of course, but you notably did not.

He pretty quickly stops however, as once he starts getting attached, he doesn't like seeing you hate him.

But for the first long while however you really couldn't get anywhere near him with him recoiling, given Crosshair's standoffish attitude. As time passes however, he'll eventually let you close. But it's a slooowww process. And even then, he really doesn't want to do anything snugglin' or hugglin' when anyone is in sight. He says it's because he's embarrassed, but reality is you're cute and he doesn't want anyone else to see.

At one point he was working on cleaning his gun after a particularly messy mission, having to take apart multiple pieces to clear out the mud and other gunk.

You noticed him doing so and decided to join him, and he seemed mellow enough.

Since he was a sedentary target, you came over and sat down, tucking yourself in close to his side while he continued working.

He pretends not to notice and react to you doing so, while interning he's melting down.

You're just casually watching him, while you're hands grasp the seam of one of his armor plates to keep him close.

He ends up slowing down his progress to a complete crawl, just so he can enjoy the feeling if you cuddling on him for as long as possible without having to admit it.

✦ Echo ✦

He'll never tell you; But Echo loves the soft little bit of fur by the base of your ear.

it's just so soft...

After a particularly stressful mission, Echo was a little rattled, and in an attempt to give him some sort of company, you laid your head down on his lap, and Echo gently pet that part for what felt like hours.

He's not too much of a talker, at least anymore, so he enjoys that you just cuddle and relax with him and help him mellow out.

It's like your contentment is contagious, as whenever you stay close to him and relax and purr, it isn't long before he 's content too.

It's one of the things he loves about you, and secretly wants you to always do.

Echo is secretly someone who loves and gets greedy for affection, he just often thinks he isn't exactly deserving of it.

If you snuggle up on him he'll usually say that it isn't worth it because of how much colder he feels compared to the others, especially with his metal limbs.

However you usually still end up snuggling with him and purring anyways, and Echo will secretly be the most content man in the galaxy for a bit.

[nkn0va]

i request yuzuriha, hilda and kaguya with an s/o that calls them mommy

Well...I can't say I wouldn't do the same

It's kind hard to write about something like this in a non NSFW context so these are gonna be a bit on the shorter side.

-It comes out on accident, most likely. Yuzu's doting on you as usual, she's the type to dote while joking about taking care of you.

-This happened so much that eventually you soon called her mommy in one of your responses to her to ask her to stop. She freezes like a dear in headlights as her eyes go wide.

-She hadn't actually expected something like that out of you, her teasing is all in good fun. If anything she sorta jokes about being your big sis, as weird as that sounds in the context of your relationship.

-She tries to shake off the awkwardness with a slightly sarcastic yet lighthearted joke that she was supposed to be your big sis, not mommy.

-She'd probably mutter under her breath about you calling her that in 'other contexts', only to deny she ever said anything. Does tease you about calling her mommy again though.

-Hilda gives off big ara ara vibes, let's be honest. It's going to come out sooner or later.

-It eventually does after you start dating. She's teasing the hell out of you, probably with some innuendos and you drop it, whether on accident on purposefully playing into the joke.

Either way, she can't stop the uproarious, amused laughter at your remark. She probably didn't see that coming but it is way too funny to her.

-She cranks up the sexual tension to 11 if it wasn't there already. Lots of jokes calling you her little boy/girl. She's definitely getting some very naughty ideas of what to do in the bedroom when the time eventually comes.

-Even in non-sexual situations she's holding that over your head. Whenever you want her to do something for you she'll hit you with a "please...", expecting you to finish the sentence.

-She'll at least have the decency to only do so in private, but she just can't help herself, especially if you get flustered over it.

-If you've known Kaguya well enough and long enough to start dating her, you're going to have to at the VERY least tolerate her teasing, but an ideal S/O would probably play into the teasing.

-It's another bout of teasing between you two and a remark she makes seems to awaken a devilish little voice in your head. Your next response immediately has you call her mommy.

-This immediately sends Kaguya into a giggling fit, rhetorically asking if that's really how you see her. You answer either with a flat out yes or with a vague "perhaps."

-Either way, she's going to tease you about "mommy" treating her good boy/girl. It doesn't take much to assume where she's going with that.

-If you react in a flustered way and shift gears suddenly at the thought, she'll laugh it off and call it just more teasing before moving on. If you react enthusiastically with a resounding yes, well...

-I think we've all seen enough hentai to know where this is going.

-Either way though, she'll get you in bed one of these days. It's only a matter of time. You both know it.

[meyerlansky]

i think the thing that bugs me most about The Clevencourse, which mostly only exists in my mind when i'm trying to write shit, is... he should be my favorite. stoic, snarky under the stoicism, has a violent streak he keeps very tightly under control because he's terrified of what it would make him, ridiculously repressed romantically/sexually, COMPLETE control freak, sharp as a tack and in a Numbers way specifically, not great with people on a one-to-one basis but understands how groups work and that it's important to know the people you interact with, shorter/smaller than the guy he doms the fuck out of. i should be ALL OVER HIM.

but the narrative doesn't actually give him opportunities to let out that violent streak, it doesn't put his internal tension on display, everyone around him fawns over him CONSTANTLY and he never seems uncomfortable with it but doesn't really do anything with it either. and then the fan reaction to him [on here, i'm not gonna get into the reddit crowd's Wrong Takes because they're just as annoying to me but in a different direction] is either "perfect woobie who can do no wrong and needs to be protected" or "complete and utter freak who outpaces everyone ever for kink and violence and callousness"

and like. neither of those move me. neither of those feel true to me. i am absolutely fucking CAPTIVATED by bucky, who is not at ALL my usual type, but like i've said in other posts, there's a fundamental tension in him between his EXTREME self-centeredness—he doesn't care that curt doesn't want to hit him, he doesn't care that crank is making valid points about the cathedral, he doesn't want to sit on the ground safe while everyone else is fighting—and the fact that he is STILL, EVEN SO, a fundamentally decent dude who cares about keeping people safe, who signed up for a dangerous job to help right nazi germany's wrongs BEFORE pearl harbor, who's the one to say "we SHOULD fold them in" about the tuskegee airmen when gale is like "i don't think anything about them," who rerouted the whole group—at least a dozen crews, 120 men—to keep one fort [piloted by someone he Really Really Likes, at MINIMUM] from going down over trondheim, who very obviously cares about people In The Abstract AND in the directly personal. it's that tension that makes him FASCINATING to me.

and it's not that gale DOESN'T have that tension! he has just as much of it IF NOT MORE, centered aroundthe fact that he Wants and categorically Will Not Allow Himself To Have. he WANTS to beat the shit out of the RAF guys, but lets curt talk him down because he Shouldn't Want To. he snaps at friedkin that they're gonna take the FW gunfire, and then right away is like "you all did such a good job" over the radio so he doesn't look like an asshole to the rest of the crew. he was GOING TO SHOOT THAT KID, and he SHOULD'VE, because it would have been WAY more interesting for him to have a single moment of rage-fueled vengeance that then haunted him for the rest of his fucking life, but he doesn't, because he has to Look Good In The Narrative.

like, curt and friedkin have like the ONLY interesting not-bucky interactions with gale BECAUSE they see that ugly side of him—curt zeroes in on his violent streak and encourages it in the pre-regensburg convo with the "we could do some real damage" as opposed to something more palatable like "we could make a big difference" or something else less aggressive. friedkin is like a kicked dog for the entire rest of the episode after gale gets in his face and won't look at him head on again. everyone else just sees Perfect Major Cleven, including gale, who never really seems to or deal with or even be angsted by his own tension, just sort of goes on acting like he doesn't have some nasty shit in him, and it's so. boring.

[wandaluvstacos]

Drawing Hand Positions on Riders

horse girl tip for artists! This is not how you draw hands on reins!

I think animators draw it like this because it's easier to animate hands in one place, but this would actually be a terrible and maybe dangerous way to ride if your horse is not highly trained to respond to leg/seat cues. ESPECIALLY with your elbows cranked back.

The correct way to ride (with contact) involves a straight line from the horse's mouth to your elbows. There shouldn't be slack in the reins, generally (there are some exceptions, such as some western disciplines, but we're talking generally). This allows you to have a full range of movement with your elbows, either back or forward, to stop your horse or give your horse its head.

Best Practices

In English, reins are held between the pinky and ring finger. This allows the pinky to make smaller, gentler motions as a signal to the horse and is the best way to create that straight line from the horse's mouth to the elbow.

So Western riding presents a lot of exceptions to these rules, but a) Western riders don't always ride without contact, especially during training and b) the same principles apply, just in a different format.

Western riders who use two hands still use the reins between the pinkies and ring fingers

The reason this might change is to neckrein, which doesn't require contact with a horse's mouth. However, it maintains that line from the reins to the elbows, even with these variations. The trick is that one CAN pick up contact if necessary.

The Wrong Way

Reins being primarily held between the thumb and forefinger. This breaks the straight line from the horse's mouth to your elbow. Pulling back this way will force your hands down at the wrist, putting pressure there instead of at the elbow, where you have much better range of movement and strength.

Resting the hands on the horse. When a horse puts its head up, this breaks the straight line from bit to elbow. The reins must be able to move with the horse's head.

JUMPING

I see a lot of people draw riders on horses jumping, and I get that it's a hard thing to draw to begin with, but one important thing to note is that in jumping there's what we call "the release". There are two types of releases.

Automatic Release

This involves never losing contact with your horses's mouth. Generally the hands are to the side of the horse's neck. They will never be on your horse's withers, as shown in the Horseland pic from the top of the post. The thing about jumping is that the horse has to be able to stretch itself forward and back, so you have to be able to let your hands move with the horse's face, all while maintaining contact, because a horse will need balancing over a jump. They don't always get it right.

Crest release

This is considered more of an "amateur" release, for people who don't have the steadiest hands while jumping. But if a horse has an awkward jump, it's better to get your hands off their mouth than it is to sit back and pull, so you can stow them on top of the horse's neck. This allows you to still have contact when you land while also ensuring you aren't yanking on your horse's mouth over the jump.

The position going over the jump depends on what stage of the jump the horse is in. The liftoff will require a forward seat.

At the center of the jump, the position should be more centered.

And the landing requires a leaning back position, with feet swinging forward to brace against the stirrups for landing.

One bonus thing... leg position! There's a straight line, from ear to shoulder to hip to heel. The angle of the knee may change depending on discipline, but even if you look at jockeys, their heels and hips are in line.