#what i learned from making this post is that i do not know how to review movies

[dear-ao3]

friends, besties, worsties, davids, and meow meows of the jury. i have a tale for you. while i claim to be no bard (like saph, the queen of very long dramatic tumblr stories that make your heart weep), i must spin a wee bit of yarn in the form of a story. what story? a story of the green cake.

we shall, as most stories do, start almost at the beginning.

the date? january 2nd.

the time? late.

the occasion? saph comes home the third.

the problem? i have no butter or sugar.

now, saph's birthday was recently, so like any other best bud i said i was making a cake. i believe my exact words were 'i'm making you a cake whether you like it or not."

now, gang, i must level with you. this is the fourth cake i've made in my life. i am a reasonably good baker (i can bake a Mean Loaf of Bread), but i'm not a very experienced baker. 3/4 cakes were reasonably good, and only one was just slightly off. so, my track record is mixed, but i am hopeful.

now, let me take you to the present.

i am sitting at my dining room table, typing this post. i am wearing a shirt covered in flour, the green cake is in the oven.

how did i get here?

well, we won't go to the beginning. we've already seen what was basically the beginning, with me having no butter or sugar. the real story begins the morning of january 3rd. which is today. which is when saph comes home, expecting a green cake. as most reasonably well adjusted people do when their roommates parents are visiting, i stressed cleaned the entire apartment at 4am, after realizing the mice in my walls are fucking. i did not leave them a condom. i did not have one that would fit them. i can only hope they have plan b. so naturally, i went to bed at 6am.

and i still had no sugar or butter for the green cake for saph.

and i needed to get started on this cake before 10am, or saph would be here before it was finished.

and i went to bed at 6am. so naturally i set my 9:00, 9:02, 9:04, 9:06 alarms, and hoped i'd lock in when i woke up.

friends, i hate to admit it, but i did not lock in. nay, i slept through all of my alarms and woke up at roughly 9:45. it was cold, damp, and the mice were still probably fucking. i threw my hair into a messy bun, and ran downstairs, only to find my mom was selling me to one direction.

jk. it was far worse.

because saph said she had sent me something.

what did saph send me?

a full poster of david malukas! do i know why? no! but he lives in my kitchen now, providing me with mental support. thanks david!

so, i begin to make the cake after laughing for about 10 minutes about why david is now in my apartment. it starts off surprisingly well. i have not forgotten the salt.

everything is normal.

until i remember.

the cake needs to be green.

why? idk thats what saph said she wanted so i am just going to do what i was told to do and make this damn cake green.

but its now late in the process, and if there is one thing i have learned in all my years of watching the great british baking show with my mom, it is to never over beat your cake.

and my cake, right now, was perfect. trust me. i ate plenty of dough to know it was wonderful.

so now i am trying to figure out how to make the most perfect shade of nico rosberg green, feeling a bit like an alchemist. david malukas is staring me down. my time grows shorter and shorter with each beat.

and then, gang, i had to give up on this being nico rosberg green. i did not want to kill my cake. my green cake. my now mint-green cake that i am baking for saph. so naturally i'm like, okay, time to pour this.

easy, right?

WRONG.

so one thing to know about me is i suck at cutting things.

it's unfortunately a key ingredient in cake making that you have a stupid little circle on the bottom of your cake tins. i cut it the best i could. which was bad. so i'm already fighting demons trying to get the stupid parchment paper from sliding every which way, and then, my friends, i realized something horrible.

the batter had not mixed at the bottom. so now i was fighting even more demons and trying not to get loose flour in my cake.

i think i succeeded. only time will tell. david is watching. the cake is almost done.

i am setting the green cake free.

look upon him now, and weep. the green cake prevails! even though he doesn't look very green yet.

and now, for the hardest part. frosting.

let's see how that goes.

david still watches.

[kdgts---zooperz]

Hmm huh. HMM. those seem to be different things. They're certainly different letters. Call me crazy, but I don't think Punkitt's saying all women need to get into a stranger's car if asked. Do you inherently trust everyone who isn't a man? because i doubt that. that's crazy.

If someone says "Oh, its okay I'm racist, I have a good reason" does that... make it okay? We all have biases. Maybe you've been burned by the same kind of person over and over: men, asians, white people. and honestly? removing biases take time. feeling tense might not be avoidable, I certainly couldn't avoid the feeling. but you should understand that you shouldn't avoid-let ALONE treat someone poorly-based on a person's race, gender, disabilities, religion, ethnicity, background, relationship status, genetics, and, much much more.

It's okay i'm sexist, i have a good reason. does not exist. There is no good reason to discriminate against a group of people. Look, the Human brain is really REALLY good at making connections. you ARE going to feel a bias form after that, lets say, the third time in a week someone in full clown make-up and clothes beats you with an iron pipe. "Clown's make me uneasy" yeah. sure that makes sense. "I am not going to go to the circus" makes sense. "I'm going to avoid a clown if i see them in the store" a bit distrustful, but if its only been a month or so i guess "I think all clowns are inherently evil and i wish harm upon them" Okay you see how that's different? how that's crossing the line? I don't know exactly what punkitt was saying. I assume the message is "you shouldn't be sexist" which is uhh, not conversational?

I don't know about the other girls out there? but yeah. a man-sexist would make me feel unsafe. because what, all of those unchecked, encouraged, biases just went away when i told her im a transwoman, not a man?

HATE is HOSTILITY, by definition. so uhh, are y'all really gonna still defend your right to harass people solely on the basis of gender? "That's not what i meant at all!" Then fucking READ BETTER, I don't know what to tell you.

It's okay for me to discriminate against people on a large scale, a few people from those group did some very bad things to me. you know who else thought like that? pretty much everyone who's ever given the order to kill civilians on a large scale.

discrimination can never be okay. NEVER jeez... --AND IF THIS ISN'T ABOUT YOU, IT ISN'T ABOUT YOU??!!??! I've suddenly seen so many people make this about them and then defened that it isn't- or outright say that there arn't people who outright HATE all men? okay. cool. then this post isn't for you??????????????????? Least im learning of people to block i thought were cool.

transgender women who have an irrational hatred of men you GOTTA get over that. Come on now

[jobean12-blog]

Lovestruck

Pairing: Javier Peña x female reader

Word Count: 4.2K

Summary: Little do you know, after being in the wrong place at the wrong time- that you've gotten yourself on the radar of some very bad men. Thankfully, you now have the protection of one very good man (and Steve, also good) but when Javi first lays eyes on you he knows he wants so much more than just to protect you.

Author's Note: Again, I apologize for deleting this post a second time. The tags are just not cooperating. I really hope things work this time! Thank you again to those who gave me notes, hope you can enjoy again! No reason for more Javi other than I can't seem to get over him and I don't want to so yay! He's been on my mind extra lately. Wishing you all a very happy New Year filled with love, health and happiness! Thank you for all the support and much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by the lovely @firefly-graphics thank you Daisy! 🥰

Warnings: lots of tension and flirting, some soft sweetness too, Javi is forward but not in a bad way, he saves the day in more ways than one and might be in a little over his head (which he's not used to), fingering, smut (unprotected p in v- but just for fanfic folks lol)

Pedro Pascal Character Masterlist

“Keep staring like that and you’re gonna blow our cover man.”

Steve’s comment goes unnoticed as Javi continues to do just that. Stare.

You’re standing against the bar, drink in hand and talking with your friend, unaware of the pair of dark chocolate eyes glued to you.

“Hey,” Steve says again.

Javi tears his eyes away from you and pins Steve with a glare.

“What?”

Steve gives him an exasperated look. “You’re not supposed to fuck her. Just protect her.”

Javi grunts before finishing off his drink, his eyes sliding back to you as you saunter over to the juke box.

He’s been watching you for days now, his infatuation only growing the more he learns the little nuances of your body and the brightness of your smile. Barely conscious of his feet moving and Steve’s disgruntled objections, he starts toward you, unsure of his intention but at this point, unable to stop himself.

You shuffle through the songs on the screen, chewing your lip with indecision. His teeth sink into his own bottom lip in response, wishing it were yours. As he gets closer, your startled gaze flies up to meet his.

Lightning rockets through his system. If he thought you were beautiful in the photos and from across the room, it’s nothing compared to what he sees standing in front of him now.

He takes a step closer. Talking to women is like second nature to him, yet he finds himself stranded in silence, second-guessing everything that pops into his head.

And if he doesn’t speak soon, his closeness will begin to alarm you. Exactly the opposite of what he should be doing.

“I can’t let you do that,” he blurts out.

“Can’t let me do what, exactly?” you retort, turning to face him with a raised brow.

Your voice slides like silk across his skin and it takes him a minute to recapture his train of thought. He tilts his head toward the song on the screen of the juke box.

“Not that song.”

You smirk. “Elaborate.”

“Everyone picks that song. Aren’t you tired of it?”

You peek up at him, a laugh flirting around the edges of your mouth.

“Do you have a better suggestion?”

“Of course,” he replies. He tries not to stare at your lips. “I like to dance so for me, something like…”

He leans in and starts to scroll through the song list, his warmth and scent sweeping over you in a magnetic wave.

He stops on a song you don’t recognize but when it begins to play the beat is lively and makes you want to move.

Your eyes meet his once more, humor lurking in their depths. “I like it.”

“Oh yeah?”

You nod and with a sultry smile over your shoulder you head back toward the bar and your friend, an extra sway to your hips that matches the music.

“I can’t believe you just did that,” Steve says when Javi returns with a smug grin. “You could blow our cover.”

“How?” Javi asks before he motions for the bartender.

“I’m surprised you let a woman get to you like this.”

“Like what?”

“Are you just going to answer all my questions with more questions?”

The corner of Steve’s mouth lifts with his last string of words and he waits as Javi just looks at him blankly.

When the song ends Javi turns his attention back to you and he finds you watching him. Without a second thought he walks over.

He smiles at your friend then asks you, “what did you think?”  

“I liked it,” you tell him. “I’ve never heard it before.”

“I should definitely play another one then. And you should dance with me.”

He catches your sharp intake of breath and realizes you might be waiting for a significant other. He feels a sharp jolt of jealousy that surprises him.

“Are you here with someone?” he asks.

Your brow quirks at his growled-out question, but you answer anyway.

“Just my friend here,” and you motion to Samantha.

Relief washes over his expression.

“So why not dance with me?”

“I’m here to spend time with Sam,” you explain, even though you can tell she wants you to go dance with him.

“She can hang out with Steve,” Javi says, throwing a thumb over his shoulder in Steve’s direction. “He’s loads of fun.”

“He’s cute,” Sam chimes in, giving Steve a little wave.

“I wouldn’t go that far,” Javi says, earning a chuckle from both you and Sam.

“So, is that a yes?”

You look incredulous. “No. The only thing I know about you is that you like to dance.”

“What would you like to know about me?” he shoots back as he leans against the bar, looking more than comfortable.

“Nothing. I’m not dancing with you. In fact, how do I know you’re not some creep trying to abduct me.”

At your unintentionally keen words Javi gives up the battle with a smile. “I’ll get you dancing sweetheart.”

“We’ll see about that…”

“Javi,” he finishes and holds out his hand. “Javier Peña”

You hesitate a moment but then hold out your hand and give him your name-even though he already knows it.

“Pleasure,” he croons as he lifts your hand to his lips and kisses your knuckles.

Warmth tingles up your arm and down your spine, rendering you speechless for a moment. Samantha pulls you from your stupor when she nudges you in the side.

“Enjoy your night ladies,” he says but not before looking you straight in the eye and adding, “I’ll be seeing you again.”

When Javi is back at Steve’s side he sighs.

“What happened? She tell you to fuck off?”

Javi practically rolls his eyes. “Not exactly.”

“Well, hope you didn’t freak her out too much because we have a job to do.”

As the night goes on you catch Javi looking your way more than once and you find it hard not to look back. He doesn’t approach you again though and the disappointment you feel is unexpected.

By eleven pm Sam is ready to go so you say goodbye and go to use the restroom before heading out. The night air is damp with impending rain, and you jog quickly to your car, hopping in and setting your bag down on the seat.

You put the key in the ignition and turn it. Nothing happens. No lights. No sound. Nothing.

“SHIT!” you shout and hit the steering wheel. Is it your battery? A faulty starter?

You’re just about to dial Sam when you hear a light rap at your window. You jump but quickly see that it’s Javi and let out a relieved breath.

You press the button to roll down the window.

“Problem?” he asks with a sideways smile.

“My car won’t start,” you sigh.

His lips turn downward. “Shit.”

“That’s what I said.”

“I can try to jump it if you want,” Javi offers.

“Really?”

“Of course.”

Javi pulls his car up close and starts to fiddle around in the trunk for the cables. Once he has everything ready you meet him by the hood.

“How come you were out here anyway?” you ask, watching as his long fingers make easy work of the clamps and wires.

“Just a feeling,” he says nonchalantly.

After following his directions and trying to start your car again you realize it must be more than the battery and let out a string of curses.

“Sorry sweetheart,” Javi says. “I’ll give you a ride home and you can deal with in the daylight.”

“I can just call Samantha.”

“You can, but it’s after midnight,” Javi says, looking at his watch. “I’m already here.”

You study him. His strong jaw, the dark hair that falls boyishly over his forehead, and the way the open collar of his shirt frames his long neck, the tempting hint of collarbone peeking out just enough to make you want to kiss it.

“Ok,” you say without further thought.

He opens your door and helps you out then waits for you to lock it before he opens the passenger door to his car.

“What about Steve?” you ask suddenly.

“Steve?” Javi repeats. “Oh, yeah. He’s fine. Has his own car.”

When he pulls up to your building he frowns when you don’t wait for him to open your door. You ride up the elevator in silence, the atmosphere between you feels charged.

You’d been more than willing to go up to your apartment yourself, but Javi insisted on walking you.

So, when the elevator opens you breeze out and past him, taking quick steps to your door.

“This is me,” you say without turning around.

You unlock the door and open it, stepping inside and setting your bag down. When you turn, Javi is filling the doorway, one hand on his hip and the other casually resting above his head on the frame like he owns the place.

“I don’t live far. If you need anything…” He holds out a card, his name and number printed on it under the Police Department symbol.

“You’re a cop? You could have told me this earlier. I would have been less worried about you murdering me.”

“DEA agent,” he corrects. “And that was never my intention.”

Your eyes meet and you feel a frisson of heat at the intensity there.

“Well, thank you for the ride.”

“Anytime sweetheart. I’ll see you around.”

He throws you a wink and pushes away from the doorframe, his long legs taking him easily down the hall before he rounds the corner and disappears.

The next morning you drag yourself out of bed and get ready to go about your day. Your thoughts are mostly occupied by Javi, and you’re almost done with your coffee before your brain registers the rest of the night and how your car failed to start.

“Shit,” you grit out. “Ughhhh.”

You think about calling Javi and asking him to take you back to the bar to get your car but then you think it might be asking too much after what he did last night. Instead, you call Sam, who is happy to come get you.

Your car is just where you left it and so is an unmarked cop car, parked right next to yours.

Javi steps out into the sunshine, a sleek pair of aviators perched on his nose and a smile on his face.

“There you are sunshine. I was wondering when you’d be back to get your car.”

He walks close and nods a greeting to Samantha.

You stand there like a fish out of water, your mouth hanging open in shock.

“What are you doing here?” you finally ask.

He shrugs with a devious grin. “Working.”

“The bar is closed.”

Ignoring your comment he continues with, “you have someone to fix this?”

“You mean like a mechanic?”

“Yeah sweetheart.”

“I was just going to call the closest shop.”

He shakes his head, clearly not liking your idea. “I got a guy. Come on.”                 

Samantha leaves you with Javi and he takes you to the shop, helping you settle everything and getting you a good price.

“I hope it doesn’t take too long to fix,” you sigh. “But thank you for helping me out.”

“Anytime gorgeous…now how about that dance?”

“You’re still hung up on that?”

He raises his brows with a tilt of his head, his smile devious.

“Fine, but how am I getting back to the bar tonight. No car. Remember.”

“I’ll pick you up. Seven.”

With that he pulls up to your place and practically jumps out of the car before it stops, rushing around the hood to get your door before you can open it.

You step out and he reaches over you to shut it, trapping you against the car.

“Thanks again,” you whisper as you lean into him.

He dips his head, but you can’t see his eyes, so you reach up to pull the sunglasses off his face. He smiles, lifting his eyes from your mouth to meet your gaze.

You hang them on his shirt, the collar open like it always seems to be, and smooth your hand down his chest. He watches you intently, one hand sliding off the car to settle on your waist. He tugs you forward, lining your body up with his using his other hand to cup your cheek and brush a calloused thumb across your soft skin.

“I told you sweetheart,” he murmurs. “Anytime.”

With one final glance at your lips he slowly moves away and you’re thankful for the strong metal of the car at your back, keeping you upright.

With a steadying breath you peel yourself away and head toward your building, looking over your shoulder to find him leaning against the car, long legs crossed at the ankle and his arms crossed along his chest.

His glasses are still hanging from his shirt, and his hair is slightly messy from the breeze. Your eyes linger and he smiles, pointing his long finger in your direction when he says, “you’re mine tonight.”

The knock at your door makes your breath catch in your throat.

“Be right there,” you shout.

You open the door and his hot gaze sweeps over you from head to toe.

“Hi Javi…”

Before the words are completely out of your mouth, he has you spun around and backed against the wall.

“Did you get all dressed up for me sweetheart?”

Biting your lip, you nod, loving the way your answer makes his eyelids lower; his breath quicken.

He dips his head and runs his nose along your neck with a deep inhale, then places a soft kiss just under your ear. His lips move across your cheek and stop just above your mouth.

“Ready to dance?”

Your knees nearly buckle underneath you, but his weight keeps you upright and you manage a nod.

The bar is crowded but you and Javi find yourself an open space at the bar and order drinks. He stays close. A hand always at your back or on your waist and when he sits on the stool, placing his feet on the bottom bar, he pulls you between his spread legs.

Your hands land on his thighs and you dig your nails in.

He growls into your ear and smooths his hand up your spine, grabbing the back of your neck to drag your face closer.

Right when you think he’s going to kiss you, he stands and pulls you toward the juke box, scrolling through the songs until he finds the one he wants. He presses play and holds his hand out.

You place your fingers in his palm, and he closes his hand around yours. With an ease that steals your breath he tucks you against him as the music starts, slow and sultry. The way he moves his hips so sensually borders on inappropriate, but you can’t find it in you to care.

Instead, you lose yourself in the way he moves and the way he feels. It’s the best kind of foreplay and when the song ends you cling to him, wishing the music could go on forever.

You tuck your head against his chest, but he presses two fingers under your chin, lifting your face to his. He’s grinning, and the way it exaggerates the lines around his eyes and softens the angles of his face makes a flutter erupt in your stomach.

A haze of electricity settles around you and you’re unable to look away. His eyes drop to your mouth and his warm breath fans your cheek as he bends, brushing his lips lightly across yours.

His moustache is soft but still tickles your skin and you want nothing more than to feel it along every inch of your body. Your fingernails dig into his shoulders, and you whisper his name just before your lips meet.

But then his mouth is gone, and a rush of cool air fills the space between your bodies.

“Steve,” you say with confusion.

Steve stands next to you with a tight grip on Javi’s arm.

“We have to go. Now,” Steve says.

“Javi?” Your stomach is fluttering for a whole different reason now, nervousness and fear taking over.

“I’m sorry sunshine,” he says, wrapping you up in his arms. “I need you to go home. Right now.”

“But…” you start, clinging to him.

“Please,” he begs. “Just trust me. I’ll come to you as soon as I can.”

“I don’t have a car,” you sputter out.

“Here,” he says and reaches into his back pocket to retrieve his keys before dropping them into your hand. “Right home ok?”

“Ok,” you say while nodding your head vigorously. “But I don’t understand…”

“I know,” he says, grabbing your face with his hands. “I promise I’ll explain later.”

He stares at you, clearly torn between wanting to kiss you and having to leave. You make the decision for him and press a soft kiss to the corner of his mouth, lingering long enough that when you pull away his eyes are still closed.

“Be careful,” you whisper.

“You too,” he says before jogging off with Steve, but not without looking back one last time.

Back at your apartment you wait and pace the floor. There isn’t much more you can do and it’s driving you nuts.

By the time you hear the knock on your door it’s past midnight and you’ve fallen asleep on the couch. You wake with a start and stand on shaky legs. Thankfully, you have enough sense to check the peephole before opening the door.

On the other side stands Javi. His leather jacket hangs open and his hair is messy and hanging loosely in front of his forehead. He looks tired but otherwise ok.

“It’s me sweetheart,” he says quietly.

Your door flies open, and you throw yourself at him. He catches you and lets out a huffed laugh that quickly dies off when you slide down his body and move back, a clear invitation.

 His eyes rake down your body, lingering on the way your dress is rumpled and sitting high on your hips, exposing the soft skin of your legs. With an audible swallow he takes a step inside, and you shut the door with a definitive slam.

“Are you ok?” he asks.

“I’m fine. Are you?”

“Yeah,” he says quietly.

You can’t blink away from his steady gaze and your blood seems to vibrate. After a calming breath you point to the couch.

“I want to know what’s going on.”

He moves past you and takes your hand in his, tugging you toward the couch before he sits. You stand at the edge, waiting.

His head drops and he presses the palm of his hand to his forehead.

“I…you already know I’m a DEA agent.”

You nod.

“And Steve and I work together…we’ve been trying to bust this drug trafficking group for a while now and somehow you got on their list…”

“List?” you repeat, feeling your palms sweat.

He stands again and takes a tentative step closer.

“Yeah, wrong place wrong time type of thing and it got you on their radar. We got tipped off from one of our informants and Steve and I were put in place for protection.”

“So, all the flirting, the dancing…you’re only here because you’re protecting me? Not because…”

He holds up a hand to stop you.

“No sweetheart,” he says. “Well, I mean yes initially that’s all it was but then I saw you and like a dick couldn’t stay away and…I didn’t mean for it to go this far.”

He looks up at you with pleading brown eyes.

“Actually, that’s a lie. I wanted to take you home from the moment I first saw you and it took everything in me not to.”

You can see he’s starting to ramble, and you soften at the way he seems desperate to make you understand.

“I promise this has nothing to do with work…I want to be here…”

“Javi.”

“And you’re safe. I promise that too. I’ll keep you safe.”

“Javi.”

He opens his mouth to speak again but you press a firm finger to his lips. He goes silent and with your gentle push falls to the couch again.

Slowly, you climb over him, settling in his lap on top of his thighs. He stares at you, eyes shadowed, and adjusts his posture to set two large hands on your waist, warm and strong.

You lean in but he meets you halfway, crashing his lips to yours. His mouth is soft but commanding and he tilts his head, coming at you better somehow, and deeper, his lips parting, one hand wrapping around your hip to pull you flush against him, the other sliding up your neck, cupping your face.

You’re undone by the way his breath shakes against your lips and the quiet groans he strangles down when you sweep your tongue across his.

You roll your hips against him, but instead of bringing relief it only makes you wilder. His mouth chases your kiss, swallowing the sound you make when he rocks up, the thick line of his cock pressing exactly where you need him.

His hand roams up your back, around your ribs, cupping your breast while the other drags you down again, pinning you to his body. You’re rewarded with another groan, and another when you grind against him.

He doesn’t stop you as you reach for his jacket, pushing it off his shoulders before going for his shirt, one by one undoing the buttons until you feel the warmth of his skin along your palms.

His mouth is on your neck, his fingers curling around the strap of your dress, dragging it down your shoulder and lower, until your bra goes with it, and you’re bare to his mouth. He sucks and kisses and your fingers find purchase in his soft hair, pulling and tugging when he continues and his lips close around your nipple in a delicate bite.

With soft grunts into your skin, he encourages you to pull harder, moving with the gesture to where you want him. Rough and desperate hands sneak under your dress to slide your panties down.

“Sweetheart?” he asks into your neck, and you nod, because frankly, he has permission to do whatever he wants.

Long fingers wrap imposingly around your thighs and his palm slides back up, teasingly slow, his kiss still rough, and then his fingertips graze over you, slippery and hot for him. His mouth goes soft and overcome against yours before he pulls away a fraction, watching your face as he fucks you with one finger, and then two, achingly slow.

And you stare at his mouth, the way it shapes the groaned curses and then tilts upward in a smug grin when he presses a thumb to your clit, and you let out a low moan.

Under your impatient fingers, his pants are soon loose and down his hips and you slide yourself over him, coating him and teasing you both until you’re a fevered mess, kisses sloppy and biting, the head of him pressing into you.

It’s a slow, perfect torture. His focus is on your expression and the sounds you’re making. But then it goes from careful to starving the second he’s all the way inside you. His grip on you is bruising, the sharp, rhythmic gasps he makes making you feel out of control.

He stares down between your bodies, slowing to watch, moving to touch you, his thumb stroking.

“That’s it gorgeous,” he murmurs. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

You want to hold back, make it last forever, but it’s too good. The pleasure hits you in a wave, his name falling from your parted lips and your body clenching around him until he captures your mouth and finishes with a lewd groan, slowing and holding you against his chest.

Your face falls to his sweaty neck and your fingers curl around his open shirt. After catching your breath, he gently brings your face to his, pressing his lips softly to the corner of your mouth and then running the pad of his thumb across your lower lip.

He lifts you off him, reaching for the tissues on the side table and helping you clean up. His actions are careful and gentle and once you’re settled he takes the blanket off the couch and drapes it over you before he wraps you in his arms and lays down.

You tuck yourself closer and kiss his neck.

“Javi?” you whisper.

“Yeah sunshine.”

“Will you stay?”

“I’m not going anywhere,” he says, kissing your cheek.

His lips tease along your jaw and you shift to give him better access, feeling his cock stir against your stomach. When his mouth reaches your ear he tugs on the soft flesh, running a hand along the curve of your spine to pull you closer and whisper, “I didn’t even get to use my tongue on you. I hate not knowing how you taste.”

Your little gasp makes him smile and his kisses continue.

“But lucky for me,” he murmurs with a brush of his lips, “we have all night.”

[chaostudee]

our little secret, liam lawson.

summary : y/n y/ln is liam's secret girlfriend and when she learns she is pregnant she decides to make a private insta to document her pregnancy. it isn't until their daughter arrives that liam introduces her to the world. faceclaim : zara goedemans warnings : language, pregnancy. a/n : ik alot of people do not like liam at all so i was scared to post this....but to those who do like and appreciate him this is for you 🫶

liamlawson so glad to be back on the grid again

liked by maxverstappen, yukitusonda, francocoplainto and 828,442 others.

user728 daniel should have never been replaced like this

f1fan this sport is a joke

user828 so happy for you well deserved !!

f1lover yessss finally we missed you smmm

justaninchident give him that red bull seat !!

f1girl NO YUKI

user90 christian horner i will never like you

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

y/nusername 🧸

liked by alexandrasaintmleux, kikagomes, liamlawson and 126,829 others.

alexandrasaintmleux i love uuuu

kikagomes your hair omggg girl i'm so jelly tell me your secrets plssss

user62 who is that in the first pic 🤔

username12 imagine having a facecard this strongg

f1fan y/n is the queen on insta because every time she always manages to make her posts aesthetic

y/nusername omggg tyyy 💞

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

messages between alexandra and y/n

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

y/npriv. made this acc to document my pregnancy journey solely for the most important people in my life, i love you all

liked by liamlawson, yourbff, yourmum, alexandrasaintmleux and 431 others.

liamlawson a bit of credit for the photos would be nice 😒

yourbff im so excited for you, you were meant to be a mummy

y/npriv. stopp ilyy

alexandrasaintmleux you are acc the cutest and i can't wait for little one to arrive

yourmum i'm so proud of you my sweet girl 💗

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

y/npriv had cravings again 🙃

liked by liamlawson, yourbff, yourdad and 262 others.

liamlawson i wish i was there to help baby im sry :,(

y/nusername just hurry up and come homeee i miss you

yourbff so so pretty my lord

yourbff and y/n im always here if u need my help literally just ask 🙄

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

y/npriv first gp and i loved it :)

liked by liamlawson, yourbff, yourmum and 320 others.

yourbff the pregnancy glow 😍

liamlawson my angel girl

liamlawson im so grateful for you

liamlawson the first of many gps btw ;)

yourmum my gorgeous daughter ❤️

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

y/nusername i love ice cream

liked by kikagomes, alexandrasaintmleux, liamlawson and 362,992 others.

user56 liam in the likes whattt

user11 he follows her what do u expect

kikagomes i aspire to be you

user45 your aesthetic is so pretty oml

user12 omgg y/n pls start a youtube channel i beg

f1fan i wish i was this pretty

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

y/npriv. baby shower

liked by yourbff, liamlawson, yourmum, alexandrasaintmleux and 407 others.

yourmum my beautiful daughter 🫶

yourbff hope you liked it (i planned it for months)

y/npriv. i loved it!!! i acc lysmmm

liamlawson you're perfect baby

liamlawson how did i get so lucky

alexandrasaintmleux pink is defo your colour

alexandrasaintmleux i can't waitt to meet her 💗

y/nusername

liked by liamlawson, carmenmundtt, kikagomes and 542,927 others.

user73 flowers from who?!?

carmenmundt so happy for you <333

user72 her smile omg im obsessed

username222 awww she looks so happy

username90 girl we know you got a man show us plssss

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

liamlawson the last few weeks

liked by yukisunoda, alexalbon, maxverstappen and 251,639 others.

user67 not liam and y/n both soft launching in the space of an hour.....a coincidence, i think not.

f1fan no.1 lightning mcqueen fan

user23 liam defender forever i fear

user00 i am speed

f1girl soft launch...okay liam i see u 🤭

justaninchident okay im the biggest danny ric fan but honestly how can u hate on liam he is so cutesy

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

liamlawsonfan liam's stream last night!!

liked by f1girl, justaninchident, f1fan and 127,928 others.

user72 at this moment he knew....he fucked up

user782 WAIT SO HE 100 PERCENT HAS A GF

f1fan okay has anyone been on twitter because now everyone thinks that y/n is pregnant?!?! wild.

user62 i wouldn't believ any of it tbh

user00 plsss it was so funny and the way he just carried on right after like nothing happened

f1lover f1 twitter can be so crazy at times because wdym people are saying that liam is going to be a father 💀

f1 BREAKING NEWS

liked by f1fan, f1girl, justaninchident and 237,921 others.

user72 WHY

username56 so strange that they didn't say why??

f1fan okay excuse me CAUSE WHAT

user89 waittt who's going to replace him

justaninchident 👀

user99 *sighs*

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y/nusername mummy loves u sm

liked by liamlawson, alexandrasaintmleux, lilymunihe and 1,628,926 others.

user HOLD ON WHAT?!?

username girl u have some explaining to do

alexandrasaintmleux she's gorgeous y/n you must be so proud 💗

lilymunihe im sobbing acc

user829 is it liam's?!?!

f1fan congrats y/n !!

༘˚⋆𐙚｡⋆𖦹.✧˚

liamlawson i love u sm my sweet girl

liked by y/nusername, maxverstappen, oscarpiastri and 9,620,625 others.

user72 WTF

username WAIT IS THIS LIAM HARD LAUNCHING HIS DAUGHTER

f1fan im so confused rn

user12 huh?!

f1lover chattt what is going on

maxverstappen congrats mate and congrats to y/n aswell

user88 damn ig f1 twitter was right for once

user99 and before gta 6 💀

taglist⭑.ᐟ

@lottalove4evelyn @sweetestgirlintown111 @mxryxmfooty @hadidsworld @llando4norris @heavy-vettel @seonghwaexile @love2readd @nichmeddar @depressedriches

[flowersforthemachines]

Some facts about Lucanis (and also Spite and the Crows) gathered from the banters

I went through all companion banters on DanaDuchy's channel after playing the game to write down all facts about companions/the world that I haven't seen brought up anywhere in the game as a writing reference (and for funsies).

Note: the list isn't 100% exhaustive. I may have missed something or didn't write something down because I had heard about it before or considered it common knowledge. If you think there's something that can be added to the post, please DM me or send an ask! (do specify what banter the information is coming from)

Other characters' posts: Bellara, Davrin, Harding, the rest to be added later this week

About Lucanis: 

Family and the past:

Lucanis learnt to cook while helping the kitchen staff at the villa when he was a little boy. One of his motivations was learning how to make churros

Side note: Lucanis mentions that cioccolata calda was his favourite drink when he was a baby, and he serves churros to a romanced Rook who picks cioccolata calda as their favourite drink. It’s all coming together! 

Lucanis wanted to be a Crow when he was a child (at least most of the time)  

All of Lucanis's relatives were Crows as well, and all of them were killed by a rival Crow house

Lucanis says Caterina would be proud of Illario hiding his plans well, as well as killing her 

Lucanis says that the hard part about setting Illario free would be convincing Caterina 

Lucanis says that nightlife was more of Illario's thing, and he never got out as much

On Crows and Antiva:

Viago still stares daggers at Lucanis for throwing his (Viago's) pet snake out of the window in a dream

Lucanis doesn't like it when people confuse murder and assassination ("Murderers are hobbyists, we are professionals")

Lucanis has taken contracts in Orlais

Lucanis doesn’t know Treviso as well as he once used to 

Heir didn’t train Lucanis

Lucanis says he has never killed an innocent “by his count” (other people may disagree) 

Lucanis doesn’t think of the Crows as a “big organisation” (unlike the Inquisition) because they stab each other too much

Lucanis became a mage-killer at Caterina’s behest (she wanted to tap into new markets)

The nickname “The Demon of Vyrantium” came from Tevinter news-sheets, though Lucanis thinks Viago started it

Lucanis says that there aren't any special tricks to killing mages. Though, if nothing else works, you can try pissing them off, as that could attract a demon that would eat the mage

Lucanis once killed half a dozen venatori while stuck inside an elevator 

Lucanis doesn’t consider himself a gentleman assassin, manners are less important than getting the job done

Lucanis sometimes spares his targets. He mentioned letting go of a servant who killed her master, as well as a 14-year-old boy. He thinks it’s wrong to kill people so young because they still have time to change

Lucanis doesn’t accept contracts without merit, and the merit is decided by the talon of the house

General:

Lucanis can make bread

Lucanis has never been to Ferelden

Lucanis isn’t interested in killing wyverns, just looking at them :)  

Lucanis has a pet snake 

Lucanis stays awake at night by cleaning his gear, exercising, studying Orlesian and knitting ("it’s just another kind of blade work") 

Lucanis doesn’t understand a lot of things people find attractive

(In a conversation with Harding) Thinking about cooking was one of the things that helped Lucanis stay sane in the Ossuary (the other was thinking about killing his enemies) 

(In a conversation with Davrin) Lucanis survived the Ossuary by shutting down and not thinking about anything except escaping

These two points sort of contradict each other. Either an inconsistency or Lucanis describing his experience differently to different people. 

The Wetlands ruined at least one pair of Lucanis’s boots

(If Rook chooses to save Treviso) Lucanis offers to pay for any supplies the Shadow Dragons may need 

Lucanis doesn't get a better bed because he's afraid of accidentally falling asleep 

Lucanis can identify the killer’s weapon and the height difference between them and the target just through the blood splatter left at the scene

Lucanis considers Grey Wardens dangerous 

Lucanis doesn’t like necromancy, because bringing people back to life is a waste of hard work

Lucanis finds the ice coffee from Minrathous offensive (Harding describes it as “snow, but made of coffee, sweet, and with cream and toffee sauce on top”)

Lucanis had never been in a romantic relationship before Rook/Neve

Relationships with other companions: 

Lucanis gets into reading Bellara’s serials (very passionately - they chat about it a bunch)

Lucanis is outraged that the Veil Jumpers don’t get paid for their work and offers Bellara his contract negotiator

Lucanis made biscuits for Assan

Lucanis is sceptical that the griffons will be safe with the Wardens

Lucanis think that Assan shouldn’t go soft (referring to the time he took care of a halla) because he is a predator at heart

(If Emmrich becomes a lich) Lucanis offers to hold a funeral for Manfred

Lucanis and Harding talk a lot about dreams (mostly silly things like showing up naked for the job, getting chased by someone/something etc.)

Lucanis thinks Harding is deadly with her bow

Lucanis offers to pay Harding for being his lookout/aide at the rate of 6000 gold per contract

Lucanis offers the help of his contract negotiator to Neve after he finds out she doesn't have one

Lucanis made deep-fried peppers for Taash

About Spite: 

Emmrich can hear Spite even when he doesn’t take over Lucanis’s body (at least from a close distance)

Spite is impartial to Emmrich, believing him more than Lucanis

Emmrich says it’s impossible to separate Spite and Lucanis without killing them

Emmrich encourages Lucanis to read to Spite to bring them closer. Lucanis agrees to let Spite pick a book

(If Emmrich becomes a lich) Spite asks if he and Lucanis can get rid of their skin too 

(If Manfred is revived at the Necropolis) Spite asks Emmrich to teach him how to use fire magic. Lucanis isn’t thrilled by the idea

Emmrich sets up wards to prevent Spite from leaving the room when Lucanis is asleep

Spite no longer sleepwalks after “Inner Demons” because he apparently understood the concept of space

By the end of the game, Spite has agreed to stop sleepwalking completely

Spite controls the wings (confirmed in banter with Harding) 

Spite wants to try swinging off the astrolabe at the Lighthouse

Spite is very excited about Manfred having hands and feet (Curiosity. Has. Feet!)

Spite finds the wisps in Neve’s room unnerving (as do Lucanis and Neve)

Spite likes to play with whetstones Bellara got for Lucanis (Bellara got them from the Irelin who supposedly got them from somewhere in Arlathan) 

Spite wants to try eating self-lightning candles at Blackthorne Manor

About the Crows: 

Crows frequently visit Nevarra and have received 20 contacts to assassinate the king. The King has been poisoned 7 times

Crows get a lot of contracts for Divine Victoria

Some seers in Rivain are powerful enough that there are contracts on them as well

Caterina once killed a man with a thimble

When Crows kill someone, most of the time they want others to know it was them (rather than presenting the death as an accident) 

The crows buried six different Eight Talons and rarely take contracts in Ferelden after the Zevran fiasco

[birdofmay]

So I know this "Be careful what you say" post is an older post, but I just wanted to show you what making a lot of progress as a "nonverbal from birth" person can look like. Regarding speech.

I don't have regressive autism, my inability to speak was there since, well, forever.

So. I was put in a lot of therapies. Speech therapy to 1. learn sign language and handle an AAC device, 2. to understand spoken language (I didn't understand spoken language until I was 3), and 3. to get more conscious of what my throat does, etc. Music therapy because I always loved music and tried to hum along to songs even back when I didn't understand language.

At some point they checked if I could say single letters or words, etc. And so on. They/we tried a lot.

So, what's the result for me personally now?

I can sing along to songs as long as I know the lyrics by heart and don't have to think about what my mouth does.

I can sometimes say single words as long as I don't have to think about what my mouth does (it doesn't work if someone says "Hey, say [word]").

I can sing melodies using vowels (a, e, i, o, u), as long as these melodies don't contain words.

I have echolalia - which makes sense because echolalia is "automatic" too and not a conscious effort to speak.

So I can do ALL of these really cool things after years of therapy..........

But I still can't speak. At least I can't communicate via speech. After all these years where people tried so much, I still can't speak.

So much for learning how to do something if you just try hard enough ☝🏼

[mothrabu-bu]

◇Metal Sonic design (and the original comic "Born to Fail" from which this is based upon) by @fernsnailz

♡Firstly, thank you fernsailz both for making the comic that inspired me to make my first, full fledged comic after several years of failing to do so, and also allowing me to do what I realize is the MOST self-indulgent and giddy i've ever been.

-----

♧Secondly, I am nervous, to write this. My knowledge of sonic is not vast. My understanding of characters may slip, despite all the research i put into them. My writing & character voice is subpar, but for once I have managed to create something out of love for this franchise and i think I needed this as well.

So even though I'm scared, frightened by the possibilies, every racing future in my mind that says "things will go wrong" "they will hate you" "you will be a failure" i find kinship in this character. Perhaps i too will learn to live. Perhaps i too will learn to love being alive.

So hopefully, this comic isn't too "out of character" or so blastfully horrificly beyond redemption as my anxious ridden brain percieves it be. I know, in my heart its not. But writing this out feels better than keeping the thoughts within me.

----

♤Thirdly, I know Chaos 0 isn't exactly a world-renowed beloved character that everyone does indepth analysis or theory crafting on. Thus, this ship may feel strange, or completely out of left feild to some.

In response, I have created an [ additional blog post ] outlining what I believe Chaos 0's character.

Of course, everyones interpretation of a character (what they represent, themes, and how they are handled) is largely a subjective process. So never take my iteration of him as gospel, and i encourage you (who are curious) to seek out information on him and determine for yourself who Chaos 0 is to you.

(That goes for Metal Sonic as well, but i'm focusing on Chaos because if not, who else will?)

---

☆Lastly, if anyone has tips or critque for me regarding making more belivable character dialouge, i'd be happy to hear. (Also theres a lot of artistic rendering inconsitencies- which is mostly because this took me a few months to make..😓✌️)

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Bonus Short sketch comic under the cut:

[This is supposed to be a quick exploration on how exacly they mightve met in this particular continuity. It was made after the comic above was finalized, but i didnt want to leave the readers questioning as to what was going on.]

[Also some swearing because i am a chronic swearing sailor, and its funny.]

[that-one-p00k1e]

─────〃★ for you, I wouldೃ⁀➷˚ ♡ ⋆｡˚

✧ summary: things they would do for you ft. Ren Kaji, Hajime Umemiya, Haruka Sakura, Hayato Suo, Jo Togame, Mitsuki Kiryu, Akihiko Nirei, Tasuku Tsubakino, Toma Hiragi, Yamato Endo, Chika Takiishi

✧ content: fluff, gn!reader (I think), OOC most likely, established!relationship, not proofread I'm sorry, tsubakino's pronouns are confirmed he/him ✦ a/n: HAAAAPPPYYYYY NNNNNEEEWWW YYYYEEAAARRR BBBBIITTCHHESSSSS😝😝😝😝 six months since I last posted omg-! I'm still alive! 😍 tysm for the support while I'm gone ily'all <33

—REN KAJI would turn off his music and pull down his headphones to listen to you ramble. Though he had his attention to his phone, he'd give silent nods and hums here and there to let you know that he was listening. Occasionally, he'd throw in little comments and questions regarding the topic you were telling. Little to your knowledge, your rambles to him were like taking notes. He'd mentally highlight things that he thought were important, and would keep it in mind in the future. He's the type to look nonchalant, but deep down, he cares more than he lets on. “... What's wrong?” he asked as he heard you abruptly stop talking. “Forget it.. You're not even listening.” You looked away in disappointment, letting out a quiet sigh. “But I have been listening,” he tried to reassure, feeling slightly guilty for making you feel neglected. “Really? Then repeat all the things I've been saying.” He, in fact, did repeat most things you've mentioned and justified his word.

—HAJIME UMEMIYA would gift you random bouquets every week, as if he hasn't gifted you enough already. What's special about his bouquets is that you can never guess the theme for the week. First, he started off classic – flowers, with the consideration of them being fake so that you'd be able to keep them forever. Then, he brought you a bouquet of snacks and sweets that he knew were your favorite. Next thing you knew, he's giving you a bouquet of money he's been secretly saving up on. You felt guilty; guilty for the effort he's been putting, just for you to return it with some unprofessional homemade baked goods. It felt unfair. But does he sail on the same boat? No. He's going to reassure you that he expects nothing in return, and that you being there for him and loving him was what all he ever wanted and needed.

—HARUKA SAKURA would spend his free time struggling to assemble a Lego flower bouquet set after learning about White Day. He wanted to return your gesture of gifting him during Valentine's, despite himself denying such intention. It took a lot of effort, in both figuring out what to get while fearing you wouldn't like it –to the point that he would even call over Nirei and Suo for help – and in building the tiny pieces of bricks after settling on a final decision for the gift. He persisted to build it himself, no matter how much his friends offered to help. He wanted to make sure it was his work purely, done with his own hands. The whole process was frustrating, infuriating, and was basically a test of patience. But after seeing how you kept the received bouquet in a glass vase – delicately treasuring it on your bedroom display – he has never felt so proud yet flustered his whole life.

—HAYATO SUO would waltz into the café without a care in the world while having scattered lipstick stains decorating his face. Moreover, it wasn't your idea in the first place– it was his. Your relationship wasn't out yet, and he thought, what better way to publish it than announcing it wordlessly but gives double the impact? “Hm? Oh, this? It's my beloved’s artwork. Do you like it?” he'll innocently ask when someone questions the visible lip prints. Sakura was a blushing mess, and Suo was very much enjoying the look of bewilderment from others as they received the unspoken news. This was the reaction he wanted. This was what boosted his pride furthermore in being your boyfriend, and he'd shamelessly do it again to show off his love for you to the world.

—JO TOGAME would be your personal walking object holder. He'd take your bag and sling it over his shoulder with you needless to say; he'd keep hair bands around his wrist in case you decided to tie your hair up; he'd hold your shopping bags throughout your journey at the mall. Never were you the one to request his aid first, and never has he complained about being tired. He'd even go barefoot just to lend you his footwear when your feet start to hurt in heels. Moreover, he'd carry you bridal along the way. Despite you worrying over him tiring himself, he persisted to keep ahold of you. He loves seeing you enjoy life without a care in the world, and he'd do anything to carry burdens that dare to get in the way of that enjoyment.

—MITSUKI KIRYU would deliberately lose in a game of UNO and let you take the victory when he could've won decades ago. The whole time the both of you were playing, he's been holding a Wild and Draw 4 but refrained from using them. Instead, he kept drawing cards and just went yolo to buy time. Though he always played fair, seeing your dejected expression after losing many rounds this time was a little too unbearable for him. He promised himself for once, just this once will he let himself take a loss. He knew it wouldn't be fair, but if it meant that he'll get to see you smile in victory, then he doesn't find any problem with that.

—AKIHIKO NIREI would write down even the littlest of details about you that were thrown at him. You'd be casually mentioning a trivial preference as a ramble, but never had he pulled out his notebook and pen so quickly. During his early stages of getting to know you, he made sure to memorize everything you told him about yourself; your favorite color, favorite food, dream place to go, he even looked up your zodiac sign after knowing your birth date. He doesn't mean it in a creepy way. In fact, it was his way to know how to get closer to you. Despite already having the skill to remember it all, he likes to write it down to make sure as well as for keepsake. Thanks to that, now he has a cheat sheet on how to make you smile.

—TASUKU TSUBAKINO would wear himself a nail polish color that reminds him of you. Or, moreover, your favorite color. He loved being stylish, and what better way to do it than having at least a part of you involved in it? He'd walk proudly in his heels that you got him as a gift, and was even more ecstatic if someone complimented them, proud that your taste in fashion was appreciated by others. He'd ask to trade manicures with you for a date, where the both of you choose a nail look for each other. But if you weren't into painting nails, he'll ask you to choose a look for him instead. On special or fancy occasions, he'd often wear your fav lip combo or makeup look, as he treasures your choices and views them as something precious and only to be used when necessary.

—TOMA HIRAGI would pull up to the function wearing either a Hello Kitty or Kuromi tee under his gakuran jacket. Was it his personal choice to do it? Clearly not. Was it his choice to willingly wear it for the sake of his beloved significant other? Very much so. After many attempts of pleading, he caved in and (begrudgingly) agreed to your whole ‘matching outfits’ idea. He ate a pill or two when he saw how he looked in the mirror. Then ate two more when he finally appeared in public, especially at how much Umemiya and the others teased him for it. It was embarrassing, but was it worth it? No questions needed. The beaming smile you immediately wore when seeing him agree to your shenanigans, was enough proof that it was all – undoubtedly – worth it.

—YAMATO ENDO would revel in the feeling of being the center of your attention as you placed stickers and colored in his tattoos or drew silly doodles along his body. He liked the feeling of flexing himself while having you express your inner artist onto him. He'd think of himself as your muse; the art and the artist. Once you were done, he'd be extremely careful with doing activities, afraid of your artwork smudging off at the slightest touch. Even during the shower, he makes sure not to wipe it with full pressure. He considered turning it into an actual tattoo, really. Because it would mean that he'd get to keep something of yours to be a part of him, eternally.

—CHIKA TAKIISHI would let you do his hair as you please. He was one to outright reject the idea of someone touching him, but you – you had the privilege to do as you please to him without him raising a finger to stop you. You had him wrapped around your delicate fingers, his head leaning into your touch as you smoothly ran your hands through his long locks of red that met its ends with yellow. When he saw that you did your hair the same way as his, a flicker of surprise reflected on his eyes. Though he tried to come off as indifferent, he was secretly pleased to acknowledge the fact that the both of you were matching. He'd spend the whole day with you while wearing those matching hairstyles, not caring about how others would think of him. All he could focus on was how ethereal you looked in your current look. In fact, he always thought you looked beautiful in any shape and form of physical aspects.

[trustmypoison]

SVT seeing you do TikTok dance trends

Requested? Yes!

Request: ‘Can do a SVT reaction when they saw Y/N dancing on the tiktok dance challenge called Sticky?’

Is 100% doing the trend with you - Joshua, Hoshi, Mingyu, Chan

Did you think you would be doing this alone?? Not a chance. He’s learning it with you just so you guys can make a cute couple’s TikTok dance video. I know these guys dance for a living and all, but they would really not care for it to just be silly and fun. It’s actually even better if one or both of you messes up or have a hard time being serious. 

Your designated camera guy - Seungcheol, Wonwoo, Seungkwan

The moment he sees you propping up your phone to film something, he’s like, ‘Hmm, whatcha doin??’ When you tell him you want to film a TikTok, he’s simply taking your phone to film it for you. His jaw might drop because he didn’t realize what you were doing at first, but he’s nothing if not a professional about getting a good video for TikTok. 

Bonus: Have you guys seen Wonu’s ‘oooo!’ thing that he does?? You know the high-pitched squeal that should not come out of a guy his size?? It’ll be like that. 

Screaming crying throwing up - Jun, DK, Vernon

Gets the notification and sort of checks out of reality for a minute after watching it. There are varying degrees of drama to this, but expect a call or a flood of texts to let you know how much he enjoyed it. He’ll look for other dance trends that you guys can do together in the future. 

How dare you sneakily post something like this?? - Jeonghan, Woozi, Minghao

Will almost be outraged at the fact that you didn’t tell him you were learning one of these trends. He would have absolutely done it with you, but you might have kept it a secret because you didn’t want him to tease you about it, or you just wanted it to be a surprise. Won’t dare tease you about it from now on as long as you include him on these little trends. 

[eyra]

stuff what I have learnt about writing good

If you've followed me for longer than two minutes then you'll likely know (because I keep going on about it) that I've been working on a novel for the past year. It's always been a dream of mine to write and publish a book and whilst I still have a long way to go before I can even start thinking about querying (whether on this book, or the next, or the next, etc.) I suppose I can now say that a book Exists. I have written A Book.

Now whether or not that book ever sees the light of day, the process of writing it has been truly eye-opening. I went in knowing virtually nothing and came out, still with a huge amount to learn, but with a whole library of tools that I didn't have before. I'm now putting these to use with the first draft of my second book and already the process feels so much more enjoyable, because I've started to figure out how to make it work for me.

I wanted to jot down what I've learnt purely for my own reference so I can keep looking back and reminding myself what worked for me first time around, but given that I get a nice number of asks picking my brain about my own writing process, I thought I might as well share all this with you lot in case there's anyone out there who finds it useful!

So here are the big things that I've learnt so far...

1. Not every trick works for every writer

This has been, by far, my biggest learning. Starting to plan a novel for me felt SO overwhelming - I felt like I was bombarded on all sides with "this is how to write a novel" content, and it felt like there was just too much to learn and like I would never find my way through it. I spent weeks (months...) doing every worksheet, every outlining method, every chart, anything I could get my hands on. Some of them, by the end, proved themselves very useful. A lot of them didn't. There are thousands of voices online that are telling you "this is the right way to write a book" or even "this is the ONLY way to write a book" - don't listen to them. Try things, but don't feel like you have to fit yourself into every single box. Just find the things that work for you.

2. It's possible to overplan

On a related note - sometimes you just need to start writing. I spent WAY TOO LONG faffing about before I put pen to paper with my first book. So, so long planning out characters and plot points, a lot of which I then had to completely reimagine mid-draft because I realised they just didn't work anymore. In hindsight, some of this was down to me being scared to actually start writing - the planning stage was a bit of a comfort zone for me, despite not naturally being a plotter/architect - I have always always always been a pantser/gardener, but I got sucked into the whole "proper authors do it THIS way" narrative.

With my second novel, I did a nice amount of planning but then just bit the bullet and started drafting. I know where my story begins, ends, what my major themes are, I know all my main characters and I know my key plot points. The rest, I'm figuring out as I draft. If nothing else - I'm having a lot more fun this time around.

3. Think about voice and tense before drafting

Yeah duh obvious right? NOT TO ME. If you were following me around April time, you may have witnessed a series of minor breakdowns when I realised that, having written a whole first draft in third person present tense, the entire book should actually have been written in first person past tense. So that meant, basically, starting over from scratch. This was a big learning for me, and not a mistake I'm likely to make again.

4. Stop looking at your word count

For someone who's never really put much thought into word count before - my approach with fanfiction has already been "it'll be as long as it'll be" - I got OBSESSED with the word count of my first couple of drafts. A lot of people will tell you that any good novel "has to be" under 100k words. I constantly see this one post on Pinterest that says "I promise you that you can tell the story you want to tell in 100k words or under." I'm definitely no expert on this (and I'll eat my words when an agent tells me my manuscript needs cutting down), but I'm sceptical - a lot of stories can and should be under 100k words, sure, but most of my favourite books are much longer than this. However, I did get stuck in a "this manuscript has to be between 70k and 100k words" mindset and felt like a failure whenever it was sitting outside of that bracket. Also - keep your genre in mind. If you're writing a rom-com, 70k could work perfectly. If you're writing fantasy, you're probably going to go over that.

5. Know whether you're an overwriter or an underwriter

And related to the above - know whether you tend to write bare bones-style then add to it, or whether you tend to dump it all on the page then cut back later. I'm the first, and I knew this, but I still panicked when my first draft was only around 70k. I felt like it was rushing through the plot at an unreasonable pace and it didn't feel "finished". This was because it was a first draft. By the time I sent my manuscript to my beta reader, it was around 126k.

6. The dumb stuff works

The title of the document for my first draft was "XXX - worst possible version" and at multiple points during the drafting process I changed the font to Comic Sans size 48. It works. Completely takes the pressure off and gives you full permission to write big, write silly, write unhinged, write mad things that you'll cut back by 90% later. But it gets it all on the page. If you're stuck or cringing at yourself in Times New Roman size 12, try Comic Sans size 48.

7. Don't compare your first draft to your favourite book

Like an idiot, I did this. I still find myself doing it. It's possibly my worst writing habit. I'll type out a page at 11pm after a full day at work and no dinner and then I'll pick up a published book and think "ah man, the page I've just written is nowhere NEAR as good as this." Published books are fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh drafts that then go through months and months of editing. Do not compare your manuscript to a published book. Just don't do it.

8. Don't try to be That Author

Good writers are good readers. Absolutely read broadly, read deeply, just read. Fiction, non-fiction, poetry, everything. And it's fine to find yourself influenced by other writers - that's how writing works. But don't try to BE other writers. One of the issues I had to unpick last year was that I was reading a lot of authors whose writing styles are very different to my own. I know my own style fairly well by this point - fanfiction's a great sandbox for figuring that out - but at certain moments during my editing phases I found myself cutting away at my prose because it felt "too different" to the books I was reading at the time. This was a weird thing for me to have done, and I went back and fixed it later.

I think what I'm trying to say with this one is: take inspiration from everywhere, let yourself be influenced by different writing styles, but find your own voice and trust it. Literature already has a Sally Rooney and a Donna Tartt and a Leigh Bardugo. It doesn't need a clone - it needs you!

I'll finish by sharing what I've found to be the most useful plotting template. This obviously isn't the total extent of my planning process by any means, but after trying about a million different plotting techniques for my first manuscript, this is the one:

The 27 chapter method (more examples here)

And finally, two little character tricks that I find invaluable:

AITAH?

Character philosophy

I hope someone out there finds something useful in this post! Although I've been writing in some capacity since I was a teenager, 2024 was definitely the year I realised that I am a writer at my core. I want to be a published author, but I'm already a writer. It brings me happiness like nothing else in the world! And I love to talk about all aspects of writing, so my ask box is always very much open.

Happy scribbling! x

[l0v3r666]

Hii, i read your childhood friend!Azul thing, and i thought it was adorable! If i can, I'd like to request the same thing but for Idia? I love my guy so much, and I think it'd be cute (you don't have to if you don't want to, obviously.)

Tysm!! This was sooooo nice to write

Childhood crush!Idia is tragic no matter how you spin it. As a kid in the Jupiter conglomerate, there’s a very small pool of people your age and of “appropriate status”. It’s not simple to make friends with Idia, but you learn to understand him well enough to love the company.

So you keep doing it. For all the times in your childhood you can’t remember, there’s NO explanation. Your family and staff can’t fill in the blanks either, apparently you were with foreign friends.. But it’s normal, isn’t it? Doesn’t everyone forget things from time to time? “Anyone who comes in contact with STYX goes into the river lethe. No exceptions.”

Attending NRC is one of the most popular teenage dreams, and you’re killing it! You don’t know the housewarden that well (considering you’re his vice), but it’s whatever- he’s a massive shut in, and you’ve done your part emailing him updates.

Childhood crush!Idia that’s fully marinated in the feeling of you in his life, and it makes it so much worse to tear you out of it. He watches as as you make NPC friends that’ll never compare to the “great anime binge” post middle school grad, or the 100% co-op completion achievement on “biggy littly planet” that you can’t recall. He insists to be the one to put you through the process. Just enough for a full data wipe. It’s a reminder to never get close to you again, but he can’t ever stay away.

Childhood crush!Idia loves you. And it’s not weird to say that because he’s known you for years, I promise!! He’d never get bored of getting to know you, but it’s scary to see you change. One moment he’s totally confident on what to say, but his input ≠ output! Atleast not anymore (what teenager is still into doing wall pushups while your friend ignores you?), sometimes he wishes he could preserve you like Ortho, then you’d never have to leave.

But childhood crush!Idia needs to get used to change- because before he knows it everything is flipped on its head. He overblots, even if nobody thought it’d be possible and you take the effort to nurse him back to health! No matter how much he flinches from your touch, you stay with him. It’s almost impossible to believe you remember,, Not the years you spent together, but he doesn’t have to break the “big news” anymore, and he’s so excited to make new memories together. Just like old times <3

[bluesturngold]

i think you genuinely don't understand how what you've posted looks to other trans women who have been in the trenches on this website for years, so let me try and break it down:

'man-hating trans feminists,' also called transmisandrists, transandrophobes, baeddels (based on a group of trans women on tumblr who were frequently harassed and whose interpersonal issues were publicized as the social group fell apart a few years ago — it is fucking unreal the term has come back into use as an insult for trans women who are vocal about transmisogyny), or the most heinous 'trans inclusive radical feminists' — which is frequently shortened to just calling trans women radical feminists or radfems indistinguishable from TERFs because the people using it are doing so with the goal of perpetuating harm against trans women — are not an issue and do not exist in any statistically significant number.

that the group exists at all is symptomatic of just how severe transmisogyny has gotten, and it reads as both naive and insulting to see a popular tumblr trans woman have the audacity to make a post chiding other trans women for — and again, this is the subtext we are reading into this based on the current state of the discourse, which you seem literally entirely unaware of — refusing to be quiet about the way we're mistreated in so-called trans friendly spaces, like among other LGBTQIA+ users on tumblr, but also well beyond just here.

the idea that any significant portion of feminists are irrational man-haters relies on extremely simple misogyny, painting women as unreasonable (read: hysterical, which at least in western cultures was at times enough to get women thrown in asylums for the rest of their lives) for having convictions rooted in our lived experiences under patriarchy which we refuse to articulate in terms that preserve the feelings of the guy saying 'not all men.'

i presume you know this and i promise i'm not trying to condescend because i like you and want you to develop a better understanding of what it's like for lots of trans women who aren't popular on this website, but for the sake of explaining thoroughly, 'not all men' is a reactionary talking point that maliciously attempts to reframe discussion of the systems of women's oppression around whether men as individuals are all misogynists or not, which is not relevant: even when a man's feelings are hurt by a jaded woman proclaiming all men are pigs and she's done with them, there is no systemic oppression that woman is furthering.

every popular argument for 'systemic misandry,' i.e. only men being drafted or fathers having worse outcomes in custody disputes is very clearly and historically based in discrimination against women, i.e. being innately physically and emotionally inferior and thus incapable of fighting in a war or being innately better suited to homemaking and child rearing on account of a mix of biological and cultural factors.

similarly, even when a jaded trans woman gets fed up and says she's tired of dealing with trans men and wishes trans women could have our own spaces, that is not transmisandry or transandrophobia as she has no systemic power over trans men: she is not the doctor or the insurance claims approver or the politician making his medical care difficult to navigate, she is not a cis man threatening him with corrective rape knowing the law will take his side, she is not the arbiter of societal beauty standards suggesting baldness is unattractive — nor is she exempt from any of these examples of transphobia, for that matter, because transphobes treat trans men as if they are women which means a lot of the stuff trans men deal with is rooted in transphobes also being misogynistic.

given we have so much overlapping oppression, it's crazy to me that instead of listening and learning when accused of transmisogyny there has been a campaign by a community of edgelord trans men on this site to brand trans women with the "man-hating feminist" stereotype as punishment for speaking up about mistreatment despite how vulnerable the trans women speaking up are.

this current transmisogyny problem on tumblr has been festering for years, with harassment campaigns here and there against trans feminine users they don't anticipate having the support network to handle it, but it most recently came to a head with the harassment campaign against youtuber and tumblr user patricia taxxon. one of the trans mascs who led it was a less popular youtuber who used his subscriber count to argue the power imbalance was actuallay tipped in her favor (which is totally detached from the reality of being an open and honest mentally ill trans feminine person with a ton of visibility online), and also posted openly about how he was doing kiwifarms lolcow-style harassment to another trans woman on tumblr, lilyorchard. he couched his behavior in mental illness by claiming he 'hyperfixates' on this sort of thing, which was just so dark for me to find out when i was looking into things. this isn't his video, but

^ there are few things that will make you question the ability of trans men and trans women to be in community together more than watching a trans masc youtuber and tumblr user 1. apparently successfully working to further the narrative that a bunch of trans women on tumblr are senseless man haters among an audience primarily consisting of young and less politically savvy trans people, 2. piling onto a trans feminine person who has a feature length film dissecting her life, and 3. drumming up harassment against another trans feminine person who admitted she's cautious around trans men because they navigate accepting trans spaces as men which can afford them privilege, which women tend to be wary of with men they don't know well.

also, vital to understanding the current moment: whenever rita got banned a lot of the people digging up her old posts and saying she deserved it for sexual harassment (making vore jokes about eating transphobes who were harassing her) were trans mascs who happened to be in the same sphere as some TERF blogs where her harassment started and decided to help out.

to be clear, i think trans solidarity is necessary, but i won't criticize the handful of transfeminist separatists on tumblr for disagreeing when there's a cadre of trans mascs and allies who keep hunting trans feminine people for sport (this is deliberate wording referencing a post a trans masc made about trans feminine people who were pointing out that transandrophobia allegations were being used in retaliation to keep them from discussing transmisogyny). i hope they'll mend their ways — even if not everyone will forgive them — or at least lose influence on other people who don't recognize they're malicious transmisogynists.

anyway back to your post:

reblogging the first part with an addition pivoting into denouncing bioessentialism comes across as a clumsy rhetorical maneuver trying to navigate the post away from the discourse, but bioessentialism being bad is such a popular belief in our tumblr sphere that it's hard to believe that's what you were originally trying to convey given the lack of context in the original post.

i also find it troubling how you articulated your point about bioessentialism, because i've never personally felt like a trans woman who's denouncing men is denouncing me, even as a trans feminine person who is early in my medical transition and still closeted, because i know jaded trans women who have gotten fed up such that they denounce men and am familiar with plenty of others in passing, they're a diverse group united by the ways they've been mistreated and aren't interested in mistreating other trans women.

not saying there aren't some trans women whose internalized transmisogyny makes them think of 'bricks' or other cruel things, but that was hot discourse a few years ago, and i don't think there's much overlap between them and trans women who hate men mentioned in the original post.

you picked a bad time to make a post suggesting trans women who view your posts on tumblr (the implicit target audience of that original post you made) are harming each other at a publicly recognizable scale when we have other intercommunity concerns. unfortunately it fits with the notion people have of your politics being underdeveloped and/or vibes based; if i remember correctly several trans feminine people i know or follow weren't huge fans of where you landed with the egg joke discussion given the size of your follower base and perceived ability to influence the discourse. i don't feel as strongly about that issue as i do this one, but the bright side is you can always learn and grow, and developing a deeper understanding of transmisogyny, transmisogynoir, and transfeminism is pretty rewarding

Punkitt please, I know this is the "how dare you piss on the poor" website but I can barely handle all these terfs and purposefully obstinate folks you're replying to

Sorry!!! Sometimes a bitch loves to argue. I would argue nearly all of them AREN'T terfs, tho: a lot of them are transgender women, which is literally why I made the post. My post was never about denying the harm of the patriarchy, it's about viewing masculinity as inherently evil and testosterone as some sort of evil poisoning hormone. It's not TERFs saying it, which I think is the issue. It's people who should know better than subscribe to ANY sort of bioessentialism. I mean why would you perpetuate the very dialogue that kept most of us in the closet?

[wangxianficfinder]

In the mood for...

Jan 1st

~*~

1. New year, new fics ahead, but before that - please rec me ONE fic you read last year ^^

i guess i'll have to change my plan by darjeelinh (E, 42k, WangXian, Modern, Meet-Cute, Falling In Love, Love at First Sight, First Kiss, First Time, Inspired by Before Sunrise (1995) and Before Sunset (2004), soft rom-com vibes, One Night Stands, but not really, Light Angst with a Happy Ending, they both have demi vibes in this fight me about it, Misunderstandings, Separations, Reunions, WangXian canon Elopement™️ shenanigans, now with art)

🔒 A Heart Undying by NonsensicalRambling (M, 114k, WangXian, Undead WWX, Canon-Typical Violence, canon-typical dead things the burial mounds, Fix-It of Sorts, Canon Divergence, Eventual WangXian, No Yīn Tiger Seal, Morally Gray WWX, Animals Eating People, WWX’s questionable choices, Morally conflicted LWJ, Oblivious WWX, WWX Creates a Sect | Yiling Wei, YLLZ WWX, Sect Leader WWX, LWJ & WQ have an Understanding)

Once Patience Bears Fruit by FinallyGotTheInvitation (E, 88k, WIP, WangXian, Immortal LWJ, Immortal LSZ, Mortal WWX, soon to be, Immortal WWX, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Fluff and Smut, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Oblivious WWX, Protective LWJ, Reincarnation, Sex Magic, Top LWJ/Bottom WWX, novel canon, "Straight" WWX, Age Difference, switching POV, Drunken Kissing, Drunken Flirting, Power Dynamics, Light Bondage) For #1 & 13 It’s a wonderfully done spin on the Immortal LWJ x Modern Reincarnated WWX trope. And not only do we have the whole family bonding in the mountains we also have all of WWX’s past loved ones reincarnated as well this time all of them live and they’re all pretty tight knit, this WWX definitely has the support system #13 was asking for, but while it is an important plot point, it’s not the main point of the fic.

Turn Left by kianspo (M, 204k, WangXian, NieLan, Canon Divergence, Fix-It of Sorts, Friends to Lovers, eventually, references to child sexual abuse, not main characters, Neurodivergent LWJ, Slow Build, Lán Family Feels, specifically, Twin Jades of Lán Feels, lwj-centric, Twin Jades of Lán Dynamics, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Angst with Happy Ending)

~*~

2. Hii I’m not sure if you guys take crossover requests? If not just ignore this! But for ITMF, I’m looking for fics that have WWX as a supreme ghost king (mdzs x tgcf). Thanks!!

Back From The Dead by Suibian_613 (T, 44k, WIP, WangXian, XuanLi, HuaLian, XuanXuan, XinQing, Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death, Supreme Ghost King WWX, Canon-Typical Violence, JZX lives and so does JYL, HX is stupid and in love, SQX is the Wind Master, Badass WWX, Not so oblivious WWX, XY is a Brat, he doesn’t kill anyone important tho, WWX has a ghost city, Let the Yunmeng Bros be Bros, Suggestive Themes, obsessive XY, gender fluid SQX)

The Red Ribbon by sanmaci (M, 22k, WangXian, HuaLian, Canon Divergence, Ghost City, Immortality, Cultivation Partners, Juniors, XL and HC find a child who happens to be WWX, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluffy wangxian, WWX is a Supreme Ghost King, First Time)

and thus the crow flies by cloudyrobinwrites (jwyoomi) (M, 39k, WangXian, MXY & WWX, HuaLian, WIP, Ghost WWX, WWX is a Calamity, Sentient Burial Mounds, The Burial Mounds Wants More Kids, Canon Divergence, what happens when a ghost king gets thrown into a murder mystery, WWX picked up MXY and decided he'll be his student now, MXY managed to summon a calamity level ghost what a guy, WWX disguises himself as a rogue cultivator, WWX's crows have adopted MXy, WWX and MXY make a very good duo actually, WangXian are going on a roadtrip, WWX learns how to do ghost mitosis, local newborn supreme ghost wranglers HuaLian, LWJ is not saying much but trust hes coping as well as he can w all these curveballsm hes just happy that WWX is back)

~*~

3. do you guys know any post-(novel)canon fics that focus on the juniors' relationship with wwx?

bespoke by cafecliche (G, 3k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Fluff, LSZ is a very good boy, which is specifically a tag for the fic but also just true in general)

See Me, Feel Me (Listening to You) by Ghost_Honey (T, 29k, WangXian, POV WWX, WWX Needs a Hug, WWX’s Abyssmal Self-Esteem, Emotional Healing, Angst, The Juniors love their Senior Wei, Curses, WWX is an Unreliable Narrator, JC & WWX Reconciliation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Platonic Cuddling)

Trust by FlyingMachine1 (G, 8k, WWX & Junior Ensemble, WangXian, Junior Quartet Dynamics, Junior Ensemble Shenanigans, BAMF WWX, Humor, junior quartet is the wwx fan club)

The following also feature the relationship between Wei Ying & the Juniors but involve time travel

❤️ Tragedy is Not the End by Hobbsy3 (T, 358k, wangxian, Time Travel, Torture, Hurt/Comfort, Golden Core Reveal, Canon Divergence from Qiongqi Pass, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Yunmeng sibling bonding, good dad wwx, good dad lwj, JZX Lives, JYL Lives, Junior Quartet Dynamics)

And They Lived Happily Ever After… by Morgana_avalon (G, 51k, WangXian, Zhuiling, Time Travel Fix-It, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Canon Universe, Canon Related, set before the ambush happens at Qiongqi Path, Canon Divergence, Bunnies, Good brother JC, Good JZX, CQL Verse)

🔒 Forget Myself in Memories by geethr75 (T, 10k, JC & WWX, JC & JL, JL & LJY & LSZ & OYZZ, WangXian, LXC & NMJ, JYL/JZX, Junior Quartet Dynamics, Time Travel Fix-It, Juniors travel to the past, Post-Canon, Canon Divergence, double trouble, Past WWX meets future WWX in MXY's body, Past JC meets future JC, Sect Leader JL, Sect Leader OYZZ, Sect Heir LJY, Fluff and Angst, Mostly Fluff, Happy Ending, JGY dies as Meng Yao, SS and JZn diesn JGS dies, WQ and WN lives, JYL and JZX Lives, no golden core transfer, No golden core melting, The Juniors save the day, WWX saves the day too, Alternate Timelines)

~*~

4. itmf fics where someone kills jgs (and that's a focal point of the fic). thanks! 💙

He Had It Coming by The_Hourglass_Muse (M, 2k, JZX & JGY, JGY & XY, Have to hide a body, Minor Character Death, JGS is dead, Dark Comedy, Revenge, Canon Divergence, Canon-Typical Violence, Warning: XY, Body Horror, Corpse Desecration, Villainous Friends)

Blood is compulsory by april_rainer (tom_bedlam) (T, 3k, LXC & JGY, Major Character Death, JGS is the major character death, no other main characters are harmed, although a lot of background people die, JGY & LXC both have various levels of feelings about killing lots of people, TW:Suicidal Thoughts, (minor but there))

🔒 Ripples in a Pond by Spiraling (Stormwind13) (T, 5k, MS & JGY, MS & Madam Jin, Non-Linear Narrative, Slice of Life, Canon Divergence, Dead JGS)

Cover-Up by nirejseki (Not Rated, 1k, JYL/JZX, Murder, But Justified, JGS dies, does it count as a major character death if no one is upset about it?)

🔒 murder is easy, especially if you're murdering an asshole by ravenditefairylights (Not Rated, 5k, JC & WWX & JYL, Canon Divergence, No Sunshot Campaign, Murder, Violence, Blood, Sibling Bonding, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Protective Siblings, Derogatory Language, really just jgs being himself)

🔒 The Straightest Path by meyari (T, 30k, WangXian, NieLan, MingLi, ChengSang, war and death, Grief/Mourning, Politics, plotting for neuroatypicals, Autistic LWJ, WWX Has ADHD, Non-Canon Relationship, No Yīn Iron, Sect Leader LWJ) it's not the focus of The Straightest Path but the story goes into details of JGS' death in chapters 9 & 10.

Wandering Eyes (That Nie Mingjue will gouge out if he notices, Father, STOP) by AstaraelWeeps (M, 12k, NHS & JGY, NHS & NMJ, 3Zun, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Murder, JGY has no idea, JGY POV, NHS is a scheming schemer who schemes, and we love him for it, Fix-It)

~*~

5. Helloo, good day to all of you mods!

For the next "In The Mood For", can I trouble you with Uncle WWX.

Like WWX raising Jin Ling instead of Jiang Cheng.

Thankss @lil-dusty-rose

~*~

6. I'm in the mood for- A Chengqing arranged marriage AU with a happy ending? Also, no archive warnings or explicit sex, please? Thanks! @greyjedijaneite

~*~

7. Helloo!! For the next ITMF, im looking for a fic which has a little slowburn and pining (wangxian ofc) and lots of jelly lz!! It would be great if there was some sexual tension too 🤭 BUT PLS NO BOTTOM LZ . The universe doesnt matter it can be modern au or post canon anything is alright. As always thank u in advance!! @for13years-i-play-inquiry-foryou

Wrong Turn, Right Place by diamondbruise (E, 71k, WangXian, Time Travel, kind of, it’s more reality travel but there’s modern wwx and cultivator lwj, Mutual Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, Jealousy, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn, Misunderstandings, Cultural Differences)

a light hidden and singing by occultings (microcomets) (E, 48k, wangxian, arranged marriage, pining, getting together, slow burn, misunderstandings, miscommunication, blood & injury, happy ending, smut)

Odd Geometry by maziodyne (M, 116k, WangXian, JC/NHS, JYL/JZX, JYL/WQ, WIP, WWX does not grow up in Lotus Pier, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiangs, Elemental Magic, Healer WWX, Sunshot Campaign, Post-Sunshot Campaign, Slow Burn, letter writing romance, flirting at inopportune times, Crows, Familiars, Homoeroticism, epic divorce incoming, triple agent WQ, lockpicking, communication (but does it change anything?))

🔒 The Promises We Make by Mayarenerose (G, 34k, WangXIan, LSZ & LWJ, LXC & LWJ, WN & LWJ, JC & LWJ, Happy Ending, Slow Burn, Fluff, Angst, Everybody Lives, Canon Divergence, Gratuitous Bed Sharing, LWJ: moves into the Burial Mounds, WWX ??? wtf??? are you??? doing??, Rabbits)

~*~

8. any recs for get lost cave scene lwj pov and/or 33 lashes + what happened after he found out about wwx’s death

~*~

9. Hi! For the next ITMF do you have any recs with intense yearning. Specifically where LWJ does the yearning. Longer fics would be great! Thanks!!!

💖 A Crying Shame by thunderwear (G, 16k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Fix-It, A-yuan to the rescue, Getting Together, Mutual Pining, Sharing a Bed, Domestic Fluff, Love Confessions, First Kiss, LWJ joins WWX at burial mounds, LWJ is soft pass it on, literally all fluff, Marriage Proposal, Oblivious WWX)

It's Only Time by etymologyplayground (T, 8k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, Epistolary, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, It's About The Yearning, Getting Together, Love Confessions, Cuddling & Snuggling, Humor)

Inquiry by incendir (G, 10k, WangXian, LSZ & LWJ)

🔒 so take my hand (take my whole life too) by cicer (E, 92k, WangXian, Modern AU, Accidental Baby Acquisition, oh my god they were roommates, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, this fic is not about trauma, it’s about the yearning, slowburn)

爱不释手; never let me go by yiqie (E, 68k, WangXian, Case Fic, Blood and Injury, Demons, Body Horror, [Podfic] 爱不释手; never let me go by argentumlupine)

~*~

10. Hello!

Could you please for itmf:

Modern aus where both wwx and lwj are older than ~35

Mlm

Thank you!

~*~

11. Okay I just finished reading Prenups and Pelicans byElpie (Horribibble)

And I want more of this is if there any other fic

That is kind of similar to this and has the reactions of all the guests because I want to read the reactions of the Jin and madam yu @constancebloodstone

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12. Do we have any " the help" fusion of wangxian where wwx is miss Celia and anyone else is minnie Jackson? Or something similar to it? Uk where the dynamics btwn wangxian is like the dynamics miss Celia amd her husband have? @jaywuji

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13. hi this is ITMF! im thinking a fic very much so wwx centric. preferably in that he has a strong support system and people who obviously care abt him. hurt/comfort or angst welcome. if there's a focus on wwx being attractive, in looks or in personality that's cool too! tysm for all the hard work and happy new year :)

In Exchange by FlautistsandPeonies (M, 8k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Implied WangXian Ending, The Power of Yiling Laozu Sexy, WWX Canon Memory Loss, WWX gets his original body back, Crack Treated Seriously, not for jc fans, Attractive WWX, WangXian Get a Happy Ending)

the stone-filled sea by yukla (T, 9k, LSZ & WWX, LSZ & LWJ, WangXian, Post-Canon, senior wei defense squad, a study of the way prejudice and injustice and anger trickle down from generation to generation, [Podfic] the stone-filled sea by yukla by Beria1021, the stone-filled sea [Podfic] by BrickGrass)

🔒 Bright Voice Roughly Rendered Softly Silent by Preludian_Staves (T, 26k, WangXian, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, No Golden Core Transfer, Muteness, Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Not JC Friendly, Confessions, Angst, Choking, Red String of Fate, Appearances by Paperman!WWX, Inventor WWX, Good Uncle LQR, WWX goes to Cloud Recesses, Feelings Realization, Caretaking, Supportive Lan Family, Genius WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Protective LWJ, Protective Lan Family, Character Death (not wwx or lwj))

Meet you at a different place by tawaen (M, 57k, WQ & WN, WN & MXY & WQ, WQ & WWX & WN, Eventual WangXian, Ghost General WN, Ghost WQ, Canon Divergence, WQ comes back to haunt the cultivation world, Bad idea to kill the one person who didn’t kill anyone, Cultivation World Critical, Not JC Friendly, Wen Remnants Deserve Better, Sīsī Deserves Better, MXY Deserves Better, POV WQ)

🔒 between the shadow and the soul by Reverie (cl410) (M, 22k, WangXian, JYL/WQ, JC/NHS, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Family, Dark WWX, Feral WWX, Memory Loss, Magic, Magical Realism, Protective LWJ, Protective JC, Protective JYL, Grief, BAMF WWX, POV Alternating)

Once Patience Bears Fruit by FinallyGotTheInvitation (E, 88k, WIP, WangXian, Immortal LWJ, Immortal LSZ, Mortal WWX, soon to be, Immortal WWX, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Fluff and Smut, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Oblivious WWX, Protective LWJ, Reincarnation, Sex Magic, Top LWJ/Bottom WWX, novel canon, "Straight" WWX, Age Difference, switching POV, Drunken Kissing, Drunken Flirting, Power Dynamics, Light Bondage) (link in #1) For #1 & 13 It’s a wonderfully done spin on the Immortal LWJ x Modern Reincarnated WWX trope. And not only do we have the whole family bonding in the mountains we also have all of WWX’s past loved ones reincarnated as well this time all of them live and they’re all pretty tight knit, this WWX definitely has the support system #13 was asking for, but while it is an important plot point, it’s not the main point of the fic.

The most dangerous thing is to love by KatAnni (E, 113k, WangXian, Golden Core Reveal, Fix-It, Everybody Lives, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Canon Divergence, Hurt!WWX, Found Family, Implied/Referenced Torture, POV Multiple, Implied/Referenced Cannibalism, Panic Attacks, PTSD, Golden Core Transfer, Golden Core Transfer Fix-it, Medical Procedures, Fainting, Major Character Injury, Blood and Injury, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Asexual JC, homophobia doesn’t exist here, Marriage Proposal, Marriage, Wedding Night, Whump) This fic is in the Sunshot campaign era, and as such WWX is obviously *going through it*, and he tried to do it with just as much secrecy as cannon. Too bad for him the author had something to say about that and he got found out basically instantly, which causes his support network to start actually supporting him… but the angry grape is still there so it’s done with a lot of caring anger.

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14. Fics about Yiling Wei Sect!! Butttt!! It was already established long ago and wwx was not the one to establish it.

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15. Hello Happy new year Everyone I am currently in the mood for some Switch/Versatile SangYao fics. @thatperson0-0

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16. For the next ITMF, does anyone know of any fics where someone tries to assassinate WWX before he defects from the Jiang clan? (Either during the sunshot campaign or shortly after) thank you in advance ✨️

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17. hi! any fics were lan zhan's rich and pays for anything wei ying needs, buys him lots of stuff, and just spends a lot of money on him? could be a sugar daddy au or just a relationship with this dynamic @ashxi-wx

The Misunderstanding by kisahawklin (T, 9k, WangXian, Modern AU, Misunderstandings, POV Outsider)

For Safekeeping Purposes by ChilianXianzi (M, 2k, WangXian, Modern AU, Gangsters, Crime Boss LWJ, Sugar Daddy LWJ, WWX Has Self-Esteem Issues, Domestic fluff but everyone’s in a crime syndicate, Found Family, Age Difference, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Canon-typical Abusive Jiangs)

🧡 All Old Things are New Again by The Feels Whale (miscellea) (M, 51k, WangXian, Reincarnation, Modern AU, canon still happened, extreme post canon, Sugar Daddy, Kink Negotiation, gentle dom!LWJ, canonical levels of consent play, Modern Cultivators, cultivators can recognize important people from previous lives, vaguely, this started out as a cute sugar fantasy and got just incredibly horny very fast, blame LWJ)

🔒 Snow by kuro (M, 38k, WangXian, Modern, Snow, Sick Character, Caretaking, Fluff, Sugar Daddy, only they're like… bad at it, Angst, Rabbits, Food, Sexy Times, occasionally)

golden when the day met the night by glitteringmoonlight (Not Rated, 95k, WangXian, Slow-ish burn, Sugar Daddy LWJ, Light Angst, Fluff, Developing Relationship, WWX gets all the appreciation he deserves, even if he's a bit confused about it at first, warprize au with a twist, in that everyone thinks WWX is a warprize, but LWJ has only platonic and honourable intentions, at first 😏, Eventual Smut, WIP)

my rivers tilt towards you by perfectlyrose (T, 26k, WangXian, Canon, Canon Divergence, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Fairy Tale Elements, dragonji, mentions of, Madam Yu's A+ Parenting, First Meetings, Romance, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort)

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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

[casscainmainly]

A Deep Dive Into Why Cass Threw Dick Out A Window

If you've been here long enough you've probably seen or heard of this moment, which is super hilarious and iconic. It's mostly discussed in reference to Dick and Cass' relationship. However, in my opinion Cass throwing Dick out a window had very little to do with her opinion of him, or even of Barbara; it has more to do with her understanding of romance and love. I briefly touched on this in my gender/sexuality post, but I'm going to explain more in depth my interpretation of how Dick functions in Batgirl (2000) as a whole. (This moment is very open to interpretation though, this is just my opinion!). So let's try to answer Dick's question: what was that all about?

Love, Language, and DickBabs

While Puckett's run is notable for not having Cass date anyone, romantic love does play a role in Cass' early understanding of the world. It's the impetus that spurs her to write: in issue 2, she sees a wife read a letter from her deceased husband, and her reaction affects Cass so strongly she immediately starts trying to write. (She also kisses the husband on the cheek earlier, which may or may not be a crush). Romance, and the ability to communicate your love, is a fundamental part of Cass' desire to learn language.

So we have Cass, who has experienced neither love nor language, living with Babs, who's in a relationship with Dick. This telephone conversation in #4 (the issue where a metahuman changes Cass' brain into understanding language) again links romance to communication. Dick and Babs are talking on the phone, unable to see each other but understanding each other perfectly; Cass and Babs, on the other hand, live together and can't understand each other at all.

"She can't talk, so it's not all that different [to living alone]." Babs is telling an eavesdropping Cass that her inability to speak prevents her from love and connection - a love and connection symbolised by one of the first romantic relationships Cass is consistently around, Dick and Barbara.

Dick as an Ideal

There's a debate whether Cass likes Dick or not because half the time they're friendly, and half the time she's punching him or throwing him out windows. This disparity makes sense if you consider that Cass strongly associates DickBabs with communication, understanding, love - very idealised notions - but she does not associate Dick as a person with them. Her interactions with Dick (sans Babs) are cute and normal - Batgirl #29 and Nightwing #81 feature some very adorable Dick-Cass moments, with no real tension whatsoever.

It's only when Cass sees Dick in a romantic light (as in associated with Babs) that she makes him into a symbol.

Cass often tries to copy Babs, thinking it's the 'correct' thing to do - in DC First: Batgirl/Joker, she goes after Joker because that's what Barbara did; later in Horrocks' run she'll wear Barbara's outfit. In a way, Cass' affairs with Tai'Darshan and Kon - as much as I do think Tai'Darshan was genuine attraction - is another way to 'copy' Barbara. In #42, Cass stares at a picture of Dick and Babs while asking if Babs likes boys. Obviously Cass knows the answer is yes, but see what she asks next, and how Barbara responds:

She shifts from 'like' to 'love', and Babs responds that she 'care[s]' about him. For Cass, whose arc in Horrocks' run is about parsing out the nuances of attraction, understanding the difference between like, love, and care is incredibly difficult. She struggles to separate familial from romantic (Bruce in #50) or romantic from platonic (Kon, and in somewhat the reverse way Steph). In this conversation, Cass comes to associate Dick with like, love, and care - DickBabs becomes not just a symbol of romantic love, but of any connection whatsoever.

The Old Costume

I've discussed elsewhere that Cass wearing Babs' old costume in #45 is a representation of her desire to be 'girly', and how she associates girlhood with someone other than herself, discarding her own costume for Babs'. But putting on a costume is not the only prerequisite for being a 'girl'. In Babs' speech to Cass, she emphasises being sexually attractive to men, with her final comment being about this "particular look Dick used to give [her]". For Cass, visual language is incredibly important; putting on Babs' costume is not about being or feeling like a girl, but about being perceived as one. Dick is symbolic of the perceiver: the one who can essentially 'grant' women their femininity.

But Cass is disgusted when Tim calls her hot, which adds to her confusion - why should Dick being attracted to Babs make Babs happy, but Tim (who's not a sibling at this time) perceiving her like that grosses her out? Cass' inability to feel good - to feel 'feminine' - through the male gaze is another sign, to her, of her failure to be a woman.

Which finally brings us to issue 46...

That Ableist Kon Comment

Cass finds out Dick breaks Babs' heart and then starts hallucinating on a drug. One of the things she hallucinates is Kon saying "who wants to date a cripple? Ain't that right, Nightwing?" and Nightwing responding "not me--at least, not anymore."

For the first time, we get to the heart of why DickBabs mattered to Cass: it was an example of a disabled person in a loving, romantic relationship. It goes back to that phone call in #4, where Babs implies that Cass is hard to care about because she can't speak. The Kon comment suggests Cass has carried that with her all this time, trying to find proof that she can be loved, no matter her disability. DickBabs showed her it could be done - the break-up shows her now that it can't be done.

Dick's hallucination mocks her disability: "look at her--she can't even read!" Attributing this mockery to Dick (whose real-life counterpart, unlike the other hallucinations, has never said anything remotely like this) shows that this 'Dick-as-ideal' is intrinsically tied to Cass' self-worth.

Honestly this whole post stemmed from me thinking about this one panel. There is no real reason, from Cass' view of Dick as a person, for her to think he's brave and noble and kind (more so than anyone else). But it's in the DickBabs context - that Dick seemed to love, wholeheartedly, a disabled woman - that makes Cass think this way. And now that DickBabs is broken up, it shows that she, too, is rotten to the core; that someone like her cannot be loved.

And so when Dick shows up, she throws him out the window.

Conclusion

In this moment, Cass isn't just reacting to Dick breaking up with Barbara, she's reacting to what it means to her. If Dick can't stay with Barbara, then that means Cass, as another disabled woman, is also unable to be loved. This all leads up to #50, which features another Cass punch to Dick's face, but more importantly is when Bruce and Cass reconcile through Cass' first language. It's a confirmation that though her verbal skills may not be fully developed, she still can communicate, and she can love and be loved.

I don't think a lot of the ideas I touched on here are fully developed, or conclude cleanly. For example, how does Cass' 'failure' to be a woman relate to her inability to be loved? Is she able to have a stable romantic relationship? There are lots more questions, but the role Dick specifically plays in Cass' understanding of romance is probably not going to develop further. I just think it's interesting how Horrocks uses the Dick-Babs relationship to explore Cass' identity.

[abbinurmel]

This whole post and all its concepts is SUCH an awesome idea. For not just Dnd alone, but also ALL fantasy media. I confess I was having my own dorky set of ideas on rebooting lizardfolk. But nowhere as good as this one.

I was considering a very different spin: what if one took ALL of the negative stereotypes associated with lizards? All the problematic irl political reptilian conspiracies, the outdated “cardboard brute savage” inherent in lizardfolk and similar races in DND, all the true and untrue stuff known to science about real dinosaurs, the phobia of modern reptiles and how venomous snake bites work, and the cool lore/less cool but interesting Creationist ideas of dragons, and their depictions in myth, AND the cavemen who lived with Dinos Creationism falsehoods, AND the depictions of lizard kaiju like Jurassic Park/Godzilla…

...what if one was to actually push them ALL into together, into one crazy stew, and made up an absurd tight knit DND origin concept, as the Lizardfolk backstory?…all the eugenics and Nazi propaganda, and Creationist/Aryan theorist dinosaur origins AND the popular myths about reptiles as animals that are false(they are ‘icky’ or ‘slimy’ and they ‘don’t have feelings’)- what if we mix them ALL and yet go in all of the VERY POLAR OPPOSITE OF DIRECTIONS, philosophically? What if we took lies and disinfo and use them from a reverse *positive* slant, as tropes. By going so ABSURD over the top it thumbs the nose at people who make all these bad ideas about reptiles, Jews/gays/the Liberals who they represent them by, both figuratively and literal. What if we steal these bad ideas, creatively mashed them til it becomes unrecognizable, if not wholesome and completely unique fantasy lore, separated from the original inspirations, and one plays it as a means of taking our collective identities back, thinking about different spiritual and secular philosophies, and just mainly for creative funny laughter?

One example: There was once a specific race, of gigantic, scaly, godlike long lived creatures…DRAGONS…they were ‘aliens’ or like angels, or the Urskek from the Dark Crystal. Great mysterious cosmic beings of vast, vast power and knowledge, but still, at heart, an expressive and inherently ‘flawed’ race, not an all knowing divine one. Basically High Elves, with added space travel or dimension hopping. They are a platoon of ‘Space Lizards’, if you will. (Reptiloids)

They came to your fantasy realm using superior tech/magic, and inhabited a world that before our time, was pure wilderness. Then humans, dwarves and other races, of much smaller lifespans and intellect, all started to evolve. The High Ones also start to breed with them….(Angels/Demons in biblical and other religious myth.)…this leads to things like Naga and Kobolds and even goblins and maybe other established creatures.

Some of them abide this, some do not, as wars or schisms of philosophy are thrust upon them. Some squabbles and scandals. Dragons as a whole are often growing less harmonic, less interested in Enlightenment, more so in teams of selfish power, cult worship and pushing who is the real head honcho/has the better fate of humanity idea and the fate of Magic itself. Soon baser, more material desires emerge, and Dragons are fighting each other more, and trying to outdo each other both in forms of magic, enhanced bodies for greater strength, and soon learn of the concept of Greed, and Worship, knowing how having often more gold attracts followers or charity beggars /more bribery of kings and armies/more access to magical artifacts and natural land sources of great power for themselves. The Dragon ideology shrinks in scope as the dragons once ethereal more long lived cosmic forms become ‘baser’, for better or for the worse. They grow to hoard gold, but also now get to understand ideas of Art and Beauty and Flamboyance. They learn to fight and even eat each other. But thru this also understand the concepts of now ‘Standing for the Greater Good in Defense of our beloved humanoids/A noble good god who sacrifices their life in fighting the Evil god’s imperialist destruction/humanoids are NOT inferior or to be made to be our pets or study lab animals, they deserve our Love and Guidance but not OUR WORSHIP and RULE over their life./Individualism vs Collective Spirituality/Equality for All to Mix and severance of old cultural ways and religious ties vs. the need for Ancestral Pride and in more negative way, Bigotry.’

(Fantasy quests, More Ancient Aliens and loose ideas of creation myths, the Fall of Man and Biblical story archetypes, all of real human history, the prehistoric dinosaurs. Human History Misinformation. Evolutionary competition between reptiles and earl tribes.)

Supposed fears of Dragons ‘de-evolving’ and ‘loss of our magics/our pure lizard genes’ concerns arise, both fabricated and grossly exaggerated and yet, some mildly based in fact alike. To a degree, as dragons mix, THEY DO grow small and more humanoid and less long lived, less toughly powerful, both physically and magically….but they ALSO get more CLEVER….they develop war machines, and languages, and technologies that never have been seen before. And let’s not exclude all the actual learned concepts of Love and Carnal Sex that do emerge out of these dalliances with the other creatures.

All of this, it is neither good, or bad, it is just inherently NEW, and for the Old Dragons, the really really BIG ones who still remain of the ancient ones and bear their ways, and those whom are of the younger generations but who admire the ancient ways and the size and powers of the ones before who came to this land, they wonder if the humanoids and/or they can ever ‘ascend’, or return back to the spirituality/might/actual plane of reality they supposedly once held. Some dragons create whole spiritual schools of thought around this, and develop ways of living in harmony with the world, to purify the soul and raise one’s consciousness back to a higher reality and Love for all things. (Founders of major religion and schools of thinking like Taoism, Kabbalah, Buddhism, Christianity, the New Age religious guru figures, martial arts and spiritual meditation and psychedelic practices as rituals to get cosmic oneness or feel linked back with nature/achieve a better sense of identity and wholeness in therapy,…and on the negative side, the dark con artists and cults who manipulate these ideas. There are those whom worship in the service of a god who believe in lifes of simplicity, shunning Hate and Material needs, and in offering constant shelter, aid and merciful kind advice to others, like certain orders of real world monks, and the friars and nuns of the Medieval ages who weren’t concerned with status or war, just being able to harbor the sick and the poor, and the undertrodden… and those who claim to be about this, yet take it so far, it becomes a dragon who demands HUMANOID SUFFERING, mental or physical, to achieve their ‘enlightenment’/bring this dragon its twisted warped idea of ‘being true enlightened overlord beings again.’ Anyone who questions the dragon’s authority or beliefs, shall be brainwashed, sacrificed and eaten or violently tortured to be made an example of.(MesoAmerican human sacrifice, the majority of religious history, witch trials. Evolutionary competing again, predator animals using mimicry and biological trickery such as pheromones, hypnotic voices, other DND magic macguffin plots,to lure followers to their cult and also gain prey.) These deceptions ESPECIALLY work on Kobolds and the eventual denizens of the tinier Lizardfolk, who grew from aforesaid hybrids of Dragon/other monster species.

“WAIT” I hear you ask, I thought ya said Early Dragons are HUGE, cosmic beings. How did they FUCK primitive man….yknow, size wise.

AH, but you see, that’s the beauty of being *magical lore* with SpaceLizards/religious allegory/real world evolution and science. All that shit is GOOFY, and all KINDS OF crazy manifested things happen! …why, just look at starfish and fungi and sea squirts and special worms, tell me HOW IN THE WORLD, do you get US, somehow ALSO being closely by DNA being related to THAT.

And, tell me ALSO another wacky common alien/myth trope?

We don’t actually *fuck* the Dragons. We later fuck their descendants, who bear humanoid organs and size proportions, but the so-called REAL Dragons. These dragons simply mated with us via technology, thru alien SCIENCE(coff I mean magic) aka Grey Aliens aboard a ship we I mea, A COOL FLOATING SKY CASTLE LAIR, probes style OR, as a ritual on a dream plane or psychotropic spirit plane style…. Maybe, maybe, the whole Jesus getting put into the Virgin Mary…IS AN ALIEN DRAGON REPTILOID GOD THING. (YEAH I AM GOING THERE, BRO, COME SHARE THIS BONG WITH ME!)

Just kidding. I do not take any of this seriously. You can like all DND stuff take or leave whatever makes sense and whatever does not.

ANYWHOOZ. These Parents of Lizardfolk. These dragons, they see this crazy debauchery going on, and some see it as an excuse to spread their seed far and wide, establishing whole nations and tribes of Kobold and Lizard people to either far or dotingly worship them/pursue glorious wisdom or science along to honor them, and, for some OTHER ones, all of this stuff is only ‘modern child garbage’ and even frightening. Remember, these guys can live for CENTURIES, so all these games of Humanity, are like, watching someone play GTA all day and all night. Quaint and inoffensive at first, sorta novel and interesting, but by a certain point it gets boring and stupid at lowest, unhealthy and unnerving at the middle end, ans HOLY SHIT STOP WITH THE VIDEOGAMES , I MUST CRUSADE A STOP TO THIS MONSTROSITY THAT IS POISONING OUR YOUTHS….and, like with all things, to some extent, they are correct, to some extent, they are very misguided and very very wrong. Dragons are USED to being the supposed top apex predators, and when the humanoids began to be sapient, as powerful idols of holy guidance. Many of the original cosmic High Council decided ‘Let’s aid these poor struggling souls/teach them not to fuck around with magic SO badly so they don’t present us with a rivaling threat, but, let us teach them enough about the secrets of the universe some of them can still be more useful and propagate ’, and so, they teach them of great ideas, give them language and symbols. Some extra special humanoids even get to flaunt their power or wealth in return for being such a good servant/literal hybrid born bastard child of theirs/religious recruiter. Some could become kings or heads of state, or belong to special enlightened / “enlightened” societies and clubs, that don’t REALLY know everything yet THINK they do, and will behind the scenes pull all the strings of humanity. (Warmongers, Illuminati, Reptiloids again, Cults/pagan societies during the Age of Reason and The Enlightenment Period in Europe, The Masons, Knights Templar and other similar groups, the rise of established universities, corporations, scientists with guarded military secrets, Popes, global alien conspiracy, missionaries, and much, much more….)

We start to rebel against our ‘gods’. Often. A lot. It often isnt pretty. We hunt them, they hunt us. We try to beg for reason, they try to beg us to see reason. Sometimes it works, if a Lizard or Kobold acts as an ambassador/holy priest. Sometimes, the dragon just says ‘fuck off, my ungrateful children, imma gonna eat ya now.’

But remember, the dragons, THEY ARE NOT gods, and the Lizardmen are also not children of gods, they are just LIZARD ALIENS. They do flawed things and lizard folk do flawed mundane things too. They build many different cultures and types of villages, they try to achieve a lack of humanoid emotion, to varying result. And also to varying result, some may have xenophobic ideas about breeding with mammals and some make efforts to be as nonhuman as able by living naturally in the wilds, or in lairs which are spiritual attempts at matching the giant mysterious alien aesthetic and structures and vehicles their ancestry supposedly had. Some might even go so obsessive as to dig up and preserve the bones of their dragon idols and worship them like holy relics, or just put on glorious prominent display, like in science museums, to objectively marvel at and study. (Giant ancient alien chunks again, paleontology.)

They can like real lizards do shed molts, and they and dragons alike need to both eat, and they get weaker without heat source. Hence Lizards I can see flocking to mostly warmer climates, such as deserts, and tropics, with all the inherent tropes associated with such geography irl, and their functions. Cold and food scarcity, and habitat destruction, all these things affect both the macro and the micro, and so, the dragons suffer more and more from the crutches of mortal society and growth, just as much as any great wild beasts do, in real life. When the humans begin to rebel, they lose ground, and habitat, and as result, dragons get small, rarer, meaner. (Bear, sharks, crocs, any larger apex predators being reduced in modern times. The phases of evolution and the modern climate change and other Extinction events destroying reptiles irl.)

As the products of spreading their wisdom and technology changes, so too does the land, and, heck, why not just for completion sake THROW IN A MAGICALLY MANIFESTED ASTEROID OR AN ICE AGE TOO…some human wizard goofed up big time, or maybe some other dragon did, and ruined a lot of people’s days….the dragons start due to the cold going into hibernation, which turns into death, as the permafrost doesn’t leave, all except the mightiest die, who seal themselves in ice, to sleep dormant, for thousands of years….(myths and games again. Actual fossils being discovered of dinosaur and mammoth. Perhaps their bones and preserved remains can be used for DND plot item macguffins.)

As the dragons in this period are dying off, the lizardmen begin to also slow down in brain activity and heighten in aggression and survivalist Spartan qualities. They panic at the way they lose numbers and grow desperate, breeding whenever they can, leading to incest, which makes them MORE stupid…they turn to wandering, bloodthirsting, rough edged brute conquerors, like old classic Orc and Goblin stereotypes, except a bit more cunning, and a bit more magical. Years pass, and their brains are growing more sluggish and stupid, and empathy is stunted, due to the cold, and their once flowering wise cultures, their vast empires, generations crush them into becoming more primitive in style and simple in aesthetic and need, as they go from New Upper Egypt level civilization levels to nomadic tundra climate clans(Mongolian horsemen, Russian pagans, and tiny pockets of hillbilly folk, or cannibal Pulp comic tribes, just little pockets of sneaky predatory buggers, just eating and fucking and scheming and barely struggling to keep their humble rural societies alive, in the face of nonstop filthy human invaders, constant fighting over game, wood to make fires, and shelters to keep sane and alive. All in the face of serving any last straggler dragons who beg and DEMAND worship and fire fuel, to stay alive.

Lizardmen at reclusive because the endangerment of dragons is akin to that of real actual dangerous exotic wild beasts that once roamed and owned the WHOLE PLANET, like sharks, bear, wolves and tiger. They are all now being reduced into smaller wild places in exile, whenever humanoids subvert them, or start to rebel and hunt them, for sport. So Lizardfolk aren’t cold dumb heartless monsters for evil sake. They just are SICK OF THE WORLDS SHIT.

Humans for centuries now are responsible for erasing their gods and destroying their culture, and while it all mostly was for the sake of getting rid of their dragon overlords tyranny, it is also which led to our usual pursuing of gold and the mere spectacle of trophy hunting, and stealing their hoarded precious magical artifacts and inventions…(King Arthurian legends, Eastern Asian myths about certain yokai and forest spirit.) Thus, when dealing among to those who dare show their ass in THEIR FORMER WORSHIPPING TEMPLE RUIN, or THEIR LONELY CAVE SHELTER which is their last resort refuge from both human knights AND other competitive dragons….the more cold hearted ones, who decide to say a big FUCK YOU to the world. Hence, you get ‘chaotic evil’ perceived races, tales like The Hobbit with Smaug.

The bitter dragons get smaller and meaner, more bad ‘clever’ solutions are thought of, and all the while, generations of primordial cosmic wisdom are lost, INCLUDING WHERE THE DRAGONS ALL ORIGINALLY CAME DROM OR WERE LIKE ONCE, IN THE FIRST PLACE. They have come to this planet with the intent to breed and fill it (The Garden of Eden). But instead, they LOST in numbers, as humanoids overtook them and changed them (Replacement theory), and hence MOST dragons, they only grew more solitary and antisocial. More darker magics, more bitter hearts, stupider selfish minds, and more material desires. They know they lost SOMETHING and yet, rarely can claim it, for the very egotistic urge to be MORE, and to pursue, at all cost, to become PERFECT, and never just accept humble surrender, is what clouds the minds most with animalistic behavior and Wants, not Wisdom and Magical Higher Insight. (Buddhism, Monotheism, and Zen again.) Instead of teaching humanity the greatest secrets of the Unvierse….We, made THEM more like US. Dragons, and now as an offshoot, Lizard folk, all follow OUR ideals and act like our fellow wild creatures. Lizardfolk, by extension, are as obsessed with their origins as Dragons, just as clueless, and just as uninhibited as man. All the kinder enlightened unselfish one’s, want peace and harmony, and they share with the humans and other mammalian beings all their wisdom to survive better against their other hateful SpaceLizard enemies. (Eugenics revisionst theories, Ancient Alien Conspiracies, both fanciful and harmless and actually bigoted ones.) They rule over the kingdoms with a dogmatic, parental approach, which like most any council of rulers TRIES to mean mostly well, but like most authoritative figures or parents, gets their charges reaaaaal sick of them telling us what to do and all of their hypocritical other bullshit after a while.

Thus, we generate in their DND world all these cultures and the ideas of ‘Kind Gods’ and ‘Evil Gods.’ (Egyptian and similar animist faiths which use crocodiles and dragons and other elemental beings who act on a spectrum of Kind to Wicked, to Bored Fey/Blue and Orange Ambiguous Mischief.)

…..say where did all the time go, I was supposed to be checking on my car appraisal.

Hey friends, I was thinking of taking a crack at doing an oft requested "monsters reimagined" for lizardfolk in the next little while, but I found myself stalled out on creating an alternative pitch for their lore.

The problem is that there's so little to work with in the " Ignorant primordial savage" role that they've been pigeonholed into that I'm having genuine trouble finding inspiration.

As such, I figured I'd encourage you all to write your own favourite take on the lizardfolk in the replies/comments, and we'll see if we can't brainstorm our way to an awnser.

Here's some of my own thoughts to get you started:

Lizardfolk as they are presented primarily exist to fufill the role of stock primitive antagonists, a one step more fantastical version of the jungle dwelling cannibals often encountered like pulp heroes like Indiana Jones/Doc Savage/Conan the Barbarian.

In many ways they are the epitome of the "fill in the blank baddie", with everything from their culture to their religion to their motivations being wholly based on the fact that they're lizardy lizards who like to do lizard things and could never be anything but. This is flat and boring, and needs to change if we have any hope of doing something with them.

The whole "uninterested in knowledge", " think with their stomachs", "don't have emotions, just instinct" is one of d&d's most glaring examples of biological determinism. It assigns lizardfolk the concept of "spear chucking savages" and then works backwards to justify why they remain savage while detouring through 19th century race science talking points.

When dealing with any kind of anthropomorphic reptile we're inevitably going to get into the "lizard people" conspiracy theory milieu, with all the baked in antisemitism. On top of that, we're also open to ancient aliens style conspiracy theories given how often Lizardfolk are typecast as "ruin dwelling primitives descended from civilizations long before recorded history".

[starfilmz]

THOROUGHFARE | UNSURE FEELINGS, DRUNKEN CALLS

⤷ A JJ MAYBANK SOCMED AU .ᐟ

──── you never expected that swapping socials with your call of duty duo would change your life — whether for better or worse, you're still not sure. friendships are made and something much more begins.

thoroughfare masterlist ──── 05 | 06 | 07

a/n: chap 6 has been a bitch to post bc tumblr couldn’t handle it but VIOLA it has arrived. this chap became a mix of smau and written fic so we doin something here 🤔 ofc it’ll still be social media based do not fret, but i feel like these written ones are needed for this. not betaread obvs so mistakes are everywhere!! lmk your thoughts, expectations, or how u see this fic ending cuz it is soon 😝

john b stood up as soon as he heard the whirring sound of his best friend’s motorcycle. it came to a stop when he stepped out on the château’s porch, leaning against one of the posts with his arms crossed. jj looked disheveled and as much as he wanted to say “as per usual”, the boy walked towards the house as if he ran into several bushes on the way.

he had a frown on his face as he faced john b. “i don’t know what do,” he finally spoke, his expression morphing that tells john b he didn’t want to admit to that. “long distance relationships are weird and, i’ve experienced worst that weird, man, you and i both know that and i—“

“alright, calm down,” john b grabbed the boy’s shoulder before he could go on another self-destructive tangent. “let’s talk about this, okay? pope said he’s on his way with beers.”

jj sighed, running a hand through his blonde hair. “it feels unfair for her that i’m making a big deal about this. it’s the whole rafe thing again! honestly, i genuinely think i overreacted.” he sat on the closest couch on the porch with furrowed eyebrows.

john b followed him, an amused expression on his face. jj noticed this, raising his eyebrows at the boy. “what’s so funny?”

he shook his head, his curls falling slightly to his side as he looked at jj. “when’s the last time you acted this way towards a girl?”

“oh, don’t start, jb.”

“i’m sorry, okay? look, you don’t need to be thinking this hard, man, alright?” the boy chuckled, patting his friend firmly on the back. “yn’s a good person, i can tell, and…” john b looked around as if anyone else but the two of them were around. he leaned closer towards jj, who didn’t think twice to do the same.

“from what i’ve read from sar’s phone, yn’s just crazy for you.”

this changed jj’s solemn expression into a mixture of lovesick, curiosity, and excitement. “i mean, that’s natural, right? she agreed to be my girlfriend so it’s natural for her to like me.” his words sounded defensive which made john b’s eyebrows rose.

“what i’m trying to say, jj, you don’t have to freak out just because you don’t know who’s around her. long distance is weird, i agree, but are you going to be like this every time she hangs out with people you don’t know?”

jj lowered his eyes, a tiny wave of shame washing over him. “no.”

“right, and i’m not trying to say don’t be jealous— you can’t help it, you like the girl,” john b held one of the blonde’s shoulder. “and if i were to give you an advice, man to man, thinking in your shoes, if you find long distance so much, why don’t you do something about it?”

jj looked up at john b, confusion etched all over his face. “what are you—“ and as if something clicked in his mind, john b nodded, confirming his thoughts. “isn’t it too soon?”

“what’s too soon?” both boys visibly flinched as pope made his presence known, beer bottles in hand. “i had to swipe this from my dad’s stack so you guys better fill me in.”

you couldn’t help the smile at john b’s story, giving it a heart as scrolled off the app. you would send a response, something about not leaving him in the streets because you guys still have a game session planned tomorrow, but you decided not to.

they were probably still at the boneyard, a place where they usually throw their parties as you’ve learned previously from jj, and they’ve shared enough stories about those to let you know those parties don’t end easily.

you sighed, sliding further into your bed as you hugged your pillow. was it silly to feel the way you do now?

you aren’t ready to fly out to see the boy you’ve been dying to see, but you want to, and you tell yourself you’re okay seeing them have fun, but as you stare deeper into your bedroom wall, you’re beginning to doubt that.

you took a deep breath, closing your eyes in an attempt to sleep and brush off your thoughts, but as soon as you do, your phone rang beside you. you moved the pillow and raised your phone, seeing jj’s profile picture and username across your screen.

jj was calling you.

you sat up, answering the phone, and placed it on your ear. loud music greeted your first, along with voices you’re not familiar with.

“—you can’t just leave her like that, jayj!” a girl harshly whispered against the speaker and it made you think she was either kiara, cleo, or sarah.

“hello?” you finally spoke, and when you did, everyone on the other side seemed to quiet down. you heard some kind of harsh slap, along with a small ‘ow!’. you didn’t recognize the rest of the voice before, but you were definitely aware someone had slapped jj.

“jj? you there?” you called once more, tone lighter in amusement. “i’m gonna hang up on you if you don’t talk.”

that seemed to catch the boy’s attention as he began sputtering away. “no, no, don’t, hello! look, i’m sorry, i’m being peer pressed right now—“

“don’t say that!” a deeper voice interrupted him.

“—and i just wanted to hear your voice…” from the way jj was talking, you could tell he was drunk, though you did believe that slap before sobered him up a bit. “i missed you, yn.”

“it’s only been a day a whole, jj,” you chuckled, leaning against your pillows. despite your answer, you couldn’t help but feel the same way. “but i missed you too, jay.”

“i’ve been building up the courage to call you all night and, i don’t know, i just wanted to hear from you before my lights go out,” jj laughed at his own words, a drunken expression all over his face you imagined.

“build up the courage? i’m your girlfriend, jay, you could call me whenever you want.” you answered, a small smile on your face.

there was a beat of silence from him and you thought it was a sign that he’s close to getting conked out, but his next words proved otherwise.

“can you say that again?” he whispered, almost like he’s hiding, which was most likely from his eavesdropping friends. “about the girlfriend thing, please?”

you hummed a playful tone, the instinct to tease jj was strong and it almost won if it weren’t the way your cheeks heated up at his voice, the way he sounded so soft and near the phone as if he was saying it directly in your ear.

“i’m your girlfriend, jj maybank. you happy?” you had to roll your eyes despite no one being with you hearing your sappy voice and attitude, anything to keep the butterflies in your stomach at bay.

“so happy, you don’t even know, baby,” the nickname came to you as a shock, but it didn’t felt wring hearing it from jj. if anything, you wanted to make him say it again. “i’m just so— oh my god, so happy. i’m your boyfriend, you’re my girlfriend— oh, bliss!”

you couldn’t help the laugh that bursted from you as jj’s voice doubled in volume. “i have a girlfriend! and she really likes me!” jj’s speaker managed to get the sound of what sounded like a crowd cheering at his embarrassing announcement, making you chuckle even further.

“alright, hands off the phone, okay— john b, take him, please? before he announces more details about yn?” another voice took over the call, and by the way the boy, who you now know is john b, responded with a ‘yes, ma’am’, you assumed it was sarah who came to the rescue.

“hey, sarah,” you greeted her. “having fun?”

“oh, we are, but no so much for jj tomorrow.”

“i can imagine, you’d think he’ll be able to live with that?” you joked.

“babe, he has no choice,” sarah responded with a laugh. “but for now, john b’s taking him back to the château to properly conk out.”

“that’s good to hear.”

“so,” she started and you already picked up the teasing tone in her voice.

“so?” you chuckled, amused at her.

“still unsure of visiting your hopeless boyfriend? was his very public and loud declaration of love for you enough?”

you hugged the nearest pillow, a warm smile spreading across your face. you felt a lot more at ease and mind solely focused on jj. “it’s enough.”

thoroughfare taglist: @yumwhy @beeskisses @callieyanderechan @udpoota @vivian-555 @popesbby @whatisoutside @roryology @readinghoes @mytimeiswaiting @marleymarleymarleymarley @urmotherlvr @fruitcakerafe @bobobellabo @max23b @mirellef2001 @bearbear21 @cassiewritessalot @baocean @ayy1234567 @lmaowhatt @scaroooos @mbella607 @dylsdaily @1mcrazybutcute

big apologies to the peeps that wanted to be tagged but aren’t here cuz i might’ve missed yall bc and for the people that are written on here but weren’t notified pls refer to this post :)