#what do i do.. how do i navigate this? i've never been here before and i feel lost even if it's def not a bad place to be in
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bittersweetsthff Ā· 3 days ago
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Hi hello! do you have any alien stage fic recs??
i most definitely do!!!
I've only read ivantill until now (cus the brainrot is real) so that's what I'll share here but once I'm done scouring the mizisua tag, I'll definitely return!
links below the cut <3
from ashes by petitfives
vampire till and vampire ivan. ivan is deranged and till suffers per usual. rating: explicit
"This is the face of the dog who has killed so many of my fledglings,ā€ Urak says, snapping Till out of his reverie. ā€œRemember it. It might be the last thing you see.ā€ Till has never liked Ivan more than he does right now. Good, he thinks, as viciously as he can. He doesnā€™t think his prayers carry any weight, but he stares hard at the saint wearing Ivanā€™s face and hopes Ivan puts a stake through Urakā€™s unbeating heart. Or, Till gets turned by a vampire, and Ivan is a vampire hunter.
the silhouette in my peripherals by Anonymous
till in the aftermath of r6. rating: explicit
Ivan is gone, but he is still there. Or: how to haunt a person.
till death do us part (so why are you before me again?) by Aminori
ivan and till reuniting in the afterlife. <3 rating: teen
When Ivan had held his belovedā€™s throat, felt the pulse of life as his own ended, he had expected to not see Till again. ā€¦ He had expected Till to live on. Had selfishly wanted it, in fact. But here his beloved was, in his arms, in a place that they were never meant to be reunited in.
And he wasnā€™t quite sure what to feel, anymore.
(or: Ivan dies. He didnā€™t expect to see Till again, but he did.)
break a heart, stitch it right back by yamscooper
till being jealous. rating: teen
If Ivan wants to laugh and giggle and twirl his hair at some girl Till has never met before, thatā€™s none of Tillā€™s fucking business. ā€œI donā€™t think Ivanā€™s hair is long enough to twirl,ā€ Mizi says. ā€œItā€™s a figure of speech,ā€ Till bites out.
a certain ivantill fan's origin story by gustavo
somehow luka becomes the #1 ivantill fan. rating: teen
Over the course of his preparation for the much-anticipated Final Round of the hit dystopian drama, Alien Stage, Luka discovers that he might be a lot more invested in his best friendā€™s love life than heā€™d expected himself to be. or: the fic where luka somehow becomes an ivantill truther.
breathe again in the world anew by aerivel
more ivantill reunions after r7. rating: teen
Till and Ivan reunite one more time. - ā€œI canā€™t say Iā€™m not disappointed.ā€ The sound of a deep, gentle voice cutting through the air startles Till enough to bang his head against the tree behind him. Wincing slightly, he sits up and jerks his head to the slowly approaching man in white. ā€œI thought you would win after all,ā€ the man continues, slowing until he stood a few feet away. The manā€™s attention is stolen by the fluttering of a crimson flower inches away from his foot. Absently, he shifts his shoe and crushes the petals beneath him. Itā€™s enough to spark something within Till. Ivan. Itā€™s Ivan.
your shadow on the wall of my room by ephemeroptera_insecta
ghost ivan haunts till. rating: teen
Till won Round 6. He had his first kiss. Heā€™s one step closer to winning. Heā€™s also, notably, now being haunted. Or : Ivan comes back as a ghost. Till realizes what Ivan has done for him, and the feelings he buried for him out of fear. They navigate life (and death) as a man and his ghost.
what weā€™re allowed to do to each otherā€™s faces by fakekniferealketchup
ivan lives and till escapes. rating: teen
When Ivan had died, the lens through which Till saw the world had fractured, rearranged, and stuck that way, like a broken bone that wasnā€™t set. A bleeding kaleidoscope of the past. A dozen years of memories clamored for fresh attention, to be reexamined, to be cut open so they could show off all the terrible wriggling things that had wormed around inside them and eaten them hollow. He couldnā€™t think of the garden, anymore; only of how stupid he had been. ā€” - ā€” Ivan lives; Till escapes the arena. There's no elegance in their reunion, but there is spit, and blood, and something close to forgiveness.
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kuromi-hoemie Ā· 3 months ago
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i am once again thinking about The Boy
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not the movie lol
#give it up for day 13#how has it just been 13 days since my first time seeing him in so long#šŸ™ˆšŸ’• i like how i haven't had A Crush in a sec and the last person it was on was him lol.#there's a lot of little stuff that's changed since then abt myself and between us ig but good lord i have never been more attracted to him#than i am now šŸ˜µā€šŸ’«šŸ˜µā€šŸ’« seeing him in sweats and a sleeveless turtleneck that first day has just had him in my head every day since#like HELP he's hot šŸ˜­ but then like... so am i omg (ā ļ½”ā ļ¾‰ā Ļ‰ā ļ¼¼ā ļ½”ā ) actually cleaning my place finally so i can have him over lol#i know I'm hot but at the same time i forget ykwim.. until i look in a mirror or see a picture and I'm like oh right i exist.#anyways ms ma'am is getting better at talking to her friends abt these kinds of things Ź•ā Ā ā źˆā į“„ā źˆā Ź” ā™”ā #i say that there's nothing I'd do for a lover that i wouldn't do for a friend and that i just love ppl fundamentally#and i know this is my true selfā€š but I'm somewhat new to living that in practice and on purpose.#I'm a little clumsy i think but no one's seemed to mind šŸ™ˆšŸ’• i am happy that I'm learning and i am happy to deepen my friendship#and i look forward to how much easier this will be to navigate a yr from now ^.^ I've been polyamorous for a year and a half ig#and i feel like I've found my comfort zone yk? :3 ā™”ā  what being polyamorous Means To Me#it's good to be here.. i look forward to the friends i will make after i move and i wish i was more forward w the boy sooner omg#but it's okay. he won't be Too far away it's just a bit of a trip. i wanna have him over a couple times before i leave tho and hopefully#many more at the next place ą«® į“–ļ»Œį“–įƒ ā™”ā  but i will visit him too hehe his family's rly nice
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bunnihearted Ā· 11 months ago
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ā„ļøšŸ‡ā•
#i feel like im going insane and tonight it's esp bad so i need to.... vent :$#some time ago i had the fortune of a very very wonderful person entering my life. and since day one BOOM i think of them every single day#im not even exaggerating.. like every single day i just think and daydream of them. i've had sm extra inabiloty to focus -#bc i just need to constantly stop and think of them.....#there is so much abt them to adore and admire. so much!!!! i didnt know someone like them could exist..#i love talking to them and i just wanna kno everything there is to know abt them!!! everything regarding interests me#there's also the aspect of how i feel talking to them. i know they dont judge the same way as other ppl do so it's easier to talk to them#tho i still have avpd so i often start over explaining myself and get insecure etc etc. i need to get out of my head!!!!#idk.. idk... it has never been like this for me. so im also scared#what do i do.. how do i navigate this? i've never been here before and i feel lost even if it's def not a bad place to be in#every single day... i just wish that i could be with them more and more. this wish never calms down it just gets bigger#but. how? how do i break this loop and make it into reality? is it only gonna stay as a desire and a daydream? :(( i rlly dont want that#im scared too. bc what if i want and can make it my reality but it just wont happen? what if it just wont#im also not the only one in this equation that decides. what if... i have to face rejection.. what if im a disappointment. what if what if#i dont know!! i only know that i think of them all day every day. it gets more nd more intense each day.#i also get more sure that it's what i want...#anywayyyy. im actually.. driving myself insane with how obsessively i think of this#i cant quite put it into words but i had to get at least some of it off my chest#like how. do i express my feelings to them. how do i turn it into reality. how do i face that fear of the unknown and smth i've never done#but also how do i face that fear and prepare for the fact that even if i want smth dreams made into reality cant be certain.#there r so many life things that decide what happens too.... not just my will and desire#but as well as.. how do i prqepare myself to deal with the potential oh whoops maybe im the only one who rlly want this.#maybe this is onesided maybe my feelings just flew out of control nd idk how to reel them back in whoops.#like i dont know at all what could happen.. all i know is what i wish.. hmm gosh this is all just making my head spin every day.
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harrysfolklore Ā· 10 days ago
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we need a fic about carlosā€™ win and piastri sistersā€™ reaction to it
THE LITTLE BITCH WON šŸ„ŗ ahhh im so happy for carlos, i had to write this ! i hope yo like thisss
READ LITTLE BITCH HERE
The Mexico City sunrise painted the sky as you and Carlos made your way to the track. He'd been unusually quiet during breakfast, that focused energy already building.
"Nervous?" you asked, squeezing his hand as your driver navigated through the early morning traffic.
"No," he said automatically, then caught your knowing look. "Maybe a little. Starting from pole hereā€¦ the run to Turn 1 is so long."
"You've got this," you brought his hand to your lips.
"Max will be aggressive-"
"And you'll handle it," you cut him off. "Like the little bitch you are."
That broke his tension, making him laugh. "How do you always do that?"
"Do what?"
"Make me feel better by insulting me."
"It's a gift," you grinned. "Now stop overthinking and kiss me before we get to the track and you go all serious racing driver on me."
He obliged, one hand tangling in your hair as he pulled you close. The kiss was deep and slow, full of everything he wasn't saying.
When you pulled back, his brown eyes locked into yours, a soft edge on them that made you melt.
It was hard to think that those same eyes glared you across the paddock once and now you were about to complete five months of being his girlfriend.
When you arrived at Ferrari, Reyes and Carlos Sr. were already there. Reyes pulled you into a warm hug while Carlos got swept up in pre-race preparations.
"My girl," she kissed both your cheeks. "You look beautiful today."
"Thank you, Reyes," you said, squeezing her hands before your eyes unconsciously drifted to the McLaren area.
"You're going to check on your brother?" she asked knowingly.
"Am I that predictable?"
"No, mi amor. Just a good sister."
You couldn't help but smile at that. Over the months you've slowly learned to not feel like you needed to choose between Carlos and Oscar, it was a slow process but their support made it easier.
You found Carlos doing his final preparations. "I'm going to check on Osc for a bit.ā€
He nodded, already half in race mode. "Tell him I said he's got this. The McLaren's race pace looked good."
"I will," you kissed his cheek. "See you on the podium, little bitch."
His engineer snorted, trying to cover it with a cough.
The walk to McLaren was filled with nervous energy. Early fans were already filling the grandstands, the atmosphere electric with anticipation.
The McLaren garage was quieter than Ferrari, the mood still heavy from yesterday's qualifying. You found Oscar in his driver room, staring intently at track maps.
"Brought you coffee," you held out his favorite pre-race drink. "And Carlos says your race pace looked good."
"Thanks," he took the cup but didn't meet your eyes. "For both."
You sat beside him, studying his face. "Talk to me, Osc. What's really going on?"
He was quiet for so long you thought he might not answer.
"I just..." he set down the coffee, running both hands through his hair. "Sometimes I feel like I'm not good enough for this. Like everyone made a mistake choosing me."
Your heart broke. "Oscar..."
"And I know it's stupid. I know I've earned my place here, but days like yesterday... it just brings all those doubts back."
"Look at me," you waited until he met your eyes. "Do you remember when you were ten, and you came home crying because some kid said you'd never make it to F1?"
A small smile tugged at his lips. "And you made him eat dirt at school the next day."
"Exactly. And what did I tell you then?"
"That I was meant for this," his voice softened. "That you could see it in the way I drove, even in karts."
"And has that changed?"
"No, but-"
"No buts," you took his hands. "You're exactly where you're supposed to be, Oscar Piastri. Bad qualifyings don't change that. Bad races don't change that. You're my little brother, and I've never been wrong about you."
He squeezed your hands. "How do you always know what to say?"
"Big sister superpower," you kissed his forehead. "Now drink your coffee and show them what you can do from P17.ā€
ā€œThank you, sister,ā€ he squeezed your shoulder, ā€œNow go back to your man, heā€™s driving like a beast this weekend.ā€
When you returned to Ferrari, the pre-race energy was at its peak. Carlos was in his final preparations, but his eyes found yours immediately.
"Oscar okay?" he mouthed.
You nodded, giving him a thumbs up. Another side effect of your relationship was that Oscar and Carlos became closer than ever. Oscar looked up to him and Carlos grew so fond of him that he cared about him like an older brother.
It was something not even in your wildest dreams would make sense a year ago. But right now felt like the perfect dynamic.
The garage began clearing for the grid walk. Carlos pulled you aside quickly.
"Para suerte," he murmured, kissing you deeply.
"Little bitch," you whispered against his lips. "Go win this thing."
Reyes and Carlos Sr. were waiting in the garage, both greeting you with warm hugs as you settled in to watch the start.
"Nervous?" Reyes asked, taking your hand.
"Always," you admitted. "For both of them."
The formation lap began, your heart pounding as you watched Carlos lead the field around. The ambient temperature was rising, making tire management crucial.
"He's got this," Carlos Sr. said confidently. "Look how smooth his formation lap is."
The garage fell silent as five red lights appeared above the start line. Your hand found Reyes', both of you holding your breath. The Mexican heat was stifling, but you barely noticed, every nerve focused on the Ferrari at the front of the grid.
"Vamos, hijo," Carlos Sr. whispered, his usual composed demeanor cracking with nervous energy.
The lights went out, and twenty cars launched forward into the long run to Turn 1. Carlos got a perfect start, but Max's Red Bull was immediately in his slipstream, the blue car looming in Carlos's mirrors. Side by side they went into the first corner, neither giving an inch.
"Come on, come on," you whispered, unconsciously leaning forward.
Carlos held firm on the inside line, forcing Max to take the longer way around. Through Turn 2, the Ferrari emerged still leading, and the garage erupted. Engineers who usually maintained professional calm were jumping up and down.
"Tranquila, mi amor," Reyes squeezed your hand. "Look how controlled he is."
The pit stop window approached, tension ratcheting up. Ferrari brought Charles in first, the stop clean but nerve-wracking.
"Pushing too hard on those tires," Carlos Sr. observed as Carlos finally pitted.
When Carlos crossed the finish line first, the garage exploded. You hugged Reyes, both of you crying and laughing. Carlos Sr. wrapped you both in a bear hug, his usual composure forgotten as he shouted "Ā”Vamos!" repeatedly.
Through happy tears, you saw Carlos pump his fist as he drove past, and you couldn't be happier for him.
The podium ceremony felt eternal. When they finally played the Spanish anthem, you saw Carlos's eyes glistening as he sang along. He caught your gaze in the crowd and winked, making your heart flutter just like it did that first time you saw him win in Australia.
Back then, you tried to play it cool, like you didn't care that he won. But right now the story was completely different.
After the ceremonies and media obligations, Carlos finally made it back to the team. He lifted you off your feet the moment he saw you, spinning you around as you laughed.
"Mi amor," he breathed against your lips before kissing you deeply.
"My champion," you whispered back. "My little bitch."
He laughed, pressing his forehead to yours. "Only yours."
Carlos received hugs, cheers and champagne showers from friends, team members and family. After taking some photos and watching him complete more interviews, it was time to head out and celebrate.
"I'm going to check on Oscar one more time," you told Carlos, as you walked through the paddock.
"Tell him to come to dinner," Carlos said. "He drove well today, P8 from P17."
You found Oscar in the McLaren garage, already changed and packing up.
"Hey champ," you smiled. "Coming to dinner with us?"
He gave you a small smile back. "Think I'll pass tonight. Bit tired, andā€¦" he paused. "Just want some quiet, you know?"
You studied his face. "You sure? Carlos specifically asked for you to come."
"I know, and tell him thanks," Oscar squeezed your hand. "But you guys should celebrate properly. I'm good, really. Just going to order room service and study the race data."
You pulled him into a hug. "You drove amazingly today. P8 from P17 is no joke."
"Thanks, sis," he hugged you back tight. "Go celebrate with your winner. Just... maybe not too loudly in the hotel? The walls are thin."
"OSCAR!"
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liked by oscarpiastri, carlossainz55 and 376,528 others
ynpiastri MY LITTLE CHAMPION BITCH šŸ„²šŸ„² iā€™m SO proud of you mi amor, we all are. one more win this season showing everyone the talented driver that you are. the best is yet to come ā¤ļø
also beyond proud of my baby brother as always, your determination and ability to push through every setback never ceases to amaze me. chin up, i know you got this
oh and lando got p2 i guess
GRACIAS MEXICO CITY šŸ˜©
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username1 AHHHH
username2 SIMP PIASTRI
username3 this is still wild to me they used to hate each otherā€™s guts
scuderiaferarri ā¤ļø
username4 this is wild bc she hated him when he won in australia šŸ˜­
nicolepiastri Congrats Carlos! Come visit and bring embarrassing stories of my daughter please
ā†³ ynpiastri MUMšŸ˜©
ā†³ username1 sheā€™s an icon
reyesvdec Te amamos ā¤ļø
ā†³ username2 the sainz love her so much i could cry
username5 HELP THE LINE ABOUT LANDO šŸ˜­
oscarpiastri Love you sis. Congrats to Carlos ā¤ļø
ā†³ carlossainz55 Thank you brother
ā†³ username2 this would send 2023 me into a coma
ā†³ username3 THIS PLOT TWIST
carlossainz55 Te amo
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At the restaurant, Lando was the only driver who joined your celebration with the Sainz family. He fit right in, making everyone laugh with stories about Carlos.
"You know," Lando said, taking a sip of wine, "I used to be Reyes and Carlos Sr.'s favorite adopted son."
"Used to be?" you raised an eyebrow.
"Yeah, then you came along with your whole enemies-to-lovers storyline and stole my spot," he pouted dramatically. "Now I'm like the forgotten middle child."
"Ay, Lando," Reyes laughed, reaching over to pat his cheek. "You're still our favorite British son."
"Small comfort when YN gets all the good Spanish mom cooking," Lando grumbled good-naturedly.
After dinner, it was time for the party celebrating Carlos' win. He claimed that he didn't want to drink much, but that went out the window when his friends lifted him up as 'Smooth Operator' played.
"SMOOTH OPERATOOOOR!" they sang terribly off-key. Carlos was laughing, one hand clutching his drink, the other reaching for you.
"Join me up here, mi amor!"
"Absolutely not," you called back, but you were laughing too.
Hours later, the celebrations were winding down. You stood outside waiting for your car, Carlos' arms wrapped around you from behind, his chin resting on your shoulder. The Mexico City air was cooler now, but his warmth kept you comfortable.
"I still can't believe it," he murmured, pressing a kiss to your neck. "Second win this season."
You turned in his arms to face him, taking in his slightly flushed cheeks and bright eyes. The victory high was still there, mixed with the pleasant buzz from the celebrations.
"You know what's different this time?" you asked, playing with the collar of his shirt.
"Hmm?"
"I don't have to pretend I'm not happy for you," you smiled, remembering Australia. "Don't have to hide how proud I am."
His eyes softened as he pulled you closer. "You were terrible at hiding it even then."
"I was not!"
"Mi amor," he laughed, pressing his forehead to yours. "You called me 'little bitch' with way too much affection."
"That was pure hatred," you protested weakly.
"Sure it was," he grinned. "Just like when you stared at me during the podium ceremony."
"I was plotting your demise."
"With heart eyes?"
"Shut up," you buried your face in his chest, feeling it rumble with laughter.
"Never," he kissed the top of your head. "I love reminding you how bad you were at hating me."
"I'm starting to hate you again right now."
"No you're not," he tilted your chin up, eyes twinkling. "You love me."
Before you could retort, the car pulled up. As you settled into the backseat, Carlos pulled you close again.
"For the record," he whispered in your ear, "I was terrible at pretending too. Ask Charles - he said I talked about you constantly."
"To complain?"
"That's what I told myself," he smiled against your hair. "But I think everyone knew better."
You intertwined your fingers with his, watching the city lights blur past. "We were kind of idiots, weren't we?"
"The biggest," he agreed. "But we figured it out eventually."
"Yeah," you turned to kiss him softly. "We did."
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yellowharrington Ā· 8 months ago
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wildflower and barley -- joel miller x reader
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pairing + fandom: joel miller x reader, the last of us (hbo)
word count: 5k+ oops
warnings/notes: smut smut smut!!! minors DNI, 18+!!! no outbreak!au. age gap (it's implied reader is in her 20s while joel is 45) and mentions of joel being kinda perverted and liking it lol. drinking (both reader and joel, not excessive), use of a dating app like tinder but not specified, unprotected PIV w creampie and oral (m+f receiving), do not fuck your tinder hookups without protection i'm just horny and gross. excessive use of darlin' as a nickname. implied that reader likes men. she/her pronouns used, afab!reader (with mentions of body parts), no use of y/n. if i missed anything lmk!
a/n: heavily inspired by this post by @yesttoheaven about joel's tinder profile!! it has been rotting my brain since i saw it which literally inspired me to write my first fic in the tlou fandom ever so please be gentle with me. i imagined show!joel because i've never played the game so do with that what you will. please reblog and leave comments if u enjoy it <3333
divider by @cafekitsune
summary: after deciding to change your age range on a dating app in hope of a change of scenery, you stumble across joel miller.
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No one likes using dating apps.
Swiping left, left, left mindlessly at troves of men holding fish, showing off their trucks, or with deer heads mounted to the walls behind their selfies holding guns.
This was Texas, after all.
Having just moved here, it was a little shocking, to say the least. But you were getting used to the ā€œeligibleā€ bachelors that were your age generally looking and acting the same. When you did end up finding someone of interest, you were usually turned off pretty quickly by whatever shitty pick-up line they had chosen. Or, your personal favourite, ā€œwanna fuck?ā€
No thanks.
It was an idyllic summer evening, the hot stuffy air of Austin flowing in through your windows. You laid in bed, propped up on the pillows against your headboard and sorting through the faces that adorned your screen. No one particularly interesting, as usual, and every profile was starting to melt together to look the same.
You sighed, looking into your settings, adjusting and increasing different metrics to hopefully change the pool just enough for there to be someone new or interesting.Ā 
Age range: 25-30
Your eyebrow cocked as you looked onto the screen, pulling the slider more to the right experimentally. No one was here to see you, and even though it was slightly embarassing to be interested in older men, youā€™d be lying if you said it didnā€™t pique your interest to imagine it. Even just to try, and see, if they ever really did grow up. You imagined it was wishful thinking, but increased the range anyways.
Age range: 35-45
Feeling the need to throw your phone across the room after doing that, you placed it face down under your pillow and slid out of bed. No use in swiping through them now, and you were getting tired of looking. A pint of Ben and Jerryā€™s and a new episode of your favourite show was waiting for you downstairs.
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
Joel Miller does not use dating apps.
He barely knows how to send a text on his phone, let alone navigate the world of online women. Not to say he didnā€™t explore the options, so to speak, but they usually were not ones that were single, his age, and in his area. Unless the ads on those sites were real, that is.
ā€œItā€™s starting to get sad,ā€ Sarah had remarked at breakfast, when they got on the topic, and Joel feigned hurt. Hand over his heart, he dropped his fork onto the plate. ā€œItā€™s not sad, Jesus. Iā€™m just busy, is all.ā€
ā€œBusy not gettinā€™ busy,ā€ Sarah remarked, and Joelā€™s eyes widened. ā€œHey now! None of that.ā€
A blush spread up his cheeks and ears as they continued to eat breakfast in slightly awkward silence, before Joel took his plate to the sink. ā€œOkay, off to school, you. And no more conversations about my dating life. Ever.ā€
Sarah laughed as she finished off the last of the juice in her glass. ā€œIā€™m just saying, dad. You can if you want to. Might be nice for you.ā€
Joel planted a soft kiss to her head before she bounded out the door, rolling his eyes and calling out a ā€˜love youā€™ before she closed the door swiftly behind her. Joel stared at his cell phone on the table. Maybe it would be nice.
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
The following evening, you were a little too excited to see the dating app specimens you had acquired. Not sure what to expect, really, and you went in with no expectations. Itā€™s not like theyā€™d magically all be tall, dark, and handsome, but some variety never killed anybody.
Paul, 41
Daddy, but not yours. No libs allowed. 6ā€™ because that matters.
You sighed deeply. Some things never change.Ā 
After swiping through much of what you were used to, a profile managed to catch your eye among the sea of disappointment.
Joel, 45
Just a Southern gentleman trying this out for the first time. Contractor of over 10 years. I love my daughter, BBQ, strong coffee, and sleeping in.Ā 
Now that was the most interesting thing youā€™d seen in a while.
He didnā€™t look a day over 40. His eyes creased at the corners when he smiled wide in his photos. He looked tan, a product of the Texas heat and his job, you thought. His features were accompanied by salt-and-pepper facial hair and messy curls that looked soft and pliable. His photos showed off his physique incredibly, tight wash-worn t-shirts pulling over his arms and shoulders, looking big, broad. He was no doubt the most handsome man youā€™d seen on an app, maybe ever.
When you swiped right before you could think too hard, you were surprised to see the green ā€œMatch!ā€ Flash across your screen.
Your fingers ghosted over the keyboard on your phone, thinking of a witty thing to say, probably for too long.
Your phone buzzed as you saw a notification pop up.
Joel has sent you a message.
Hey, darlinā€™. How are ya?
You felt your face warm at the sweet message, when was the last time someone had called you darlinā€™? Ever?
Hey cowboy. Iā€™m great, how are you?
He was certainly an eager responder, taking only a few seconds to reply. You found yourself smiling down at your phone screen.
Cowboyā€¦ I like that. Iā€™m better now that Iā€™m talking to you.
Oh, Joel, who told you to say that? šŸ˜‚
No good?
Not bad. 6/10.Ā 
Only 6/10? Iā€™ll work on it. I like to think Iā€™m better in person.Ā 
I would love to find out.Ā 
You found yourself emboldened by how easy the conversation was flowing. Joel was certainly easy to talk to, easier than the other matches you had going for you, and infinitely more handsome.
Oh, would you? Alright. Iā€™d love to take you to dinner sometime. If you donā€™t mind being seen with an old man such as myself in public. Or meeting a stranger from the internet.
Heā€™s a very handsome stranger. I would love to go to dinner with you. Know any good spots? Iā€™m new around here.
Thereā€™s a great barbecue spot in downtown Austin. If youā€™d prefer something fancier, let me know.
I love bbq. Just tell me where and when, cowboy.
Tomorrow, 7pm ok?
You sent him your phone number in the message. Fuck it.
Sounds great. Text me the address, Iā€™ll be there. :)
Joelā€™s reply didnā€™t come. Instead, a text appeared at the top of your screen with an unknown number.Ā 
Itā€™s Joel. This the right number?
Yup. You found me.
Great. Talk tomorrow sweetheart. Looking forward to it. :)
He texted you the address of the restaurant, right before you opened the contact card, saving his name as ā€œcowboy ā™”ā€.
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
Cowboy. Cowboy. Cowboy. It was playing over in his head like a broken fuckinā€™ record.Ā 
Joel was positively freaking out about this date.
Sarah had managed to secure a sleepover at her friendā€™s place, so the house would be empty for the night. He had been busying himself with cleaning the entirety of the house, even taking the time to mow the grass before work and vacuum the family room. He canā€™t remember the last time he vacuumed anywhere.
Would she even make it back here? How does this work? Will she want to sleep over or hang out on the couch or should he be making a dessert for after?
His mind was brought out of itā€™s craze by Sarah jumping down the stairs. She plopped her bag down on the freshly wiped countertop.
ā€œCareful,ā€ he warned, putting a hand up. ā€œI just cleaned that off.ā€
ā€œI can tell. It smells like the cleaning aisle threw up in here.ā€
He smirked before patting her head with his hand, as she aggressively smoothed out her hair. ā€œDad! Donā€™t!ā€
ā€œWhen do you wanna go to Ellieā€™s?ā€ He asked, more gaging how long he has left to get ready than actually asking.
ā€œProbably soon. Why? Tryna get rid of me?ā€ she poked her dad in the side, but when she flinched away instead, a large smile spread across her face. He was tense.
ā€œWhatā€™s your deal?ā€ Joel hated the way she knew him so well sometimes.
ā€œNothing.ā€œ
ā€œAre you going on a date?ā€
Silence fell over the kitchen between the two of them, as Joelā€™s shoulders slumped in defeat. ā€œHow did you know?ā€
ā€œOh my god, you actually took my advice,ā€ Sarah laughed, watching her dadā€™s face burn red with embarrassment. ā€œJust donā€™t do anything weird on communal surfaces, please.ā€
Joel shook his head at her suggestion, already becoming annoyed with the whole prospect. He was so nervous, about what to wear, how to act, what the expectation wasā€¦ let alone, what would happen if they made it back to his place at all.Ā 
Although, when he was able to shake his nerves for a second, he was just really fucking excited.
ā€œWear those dark jeans, and that green shirt you wore to Tommyā€™s last week. Looks good on you.ā€ Sarah smiled as she put her arms around Joelā€™s middle, while his worries melted away with her touch. ā€œSheā€™ll love you, I promise.ā€
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
It had been such a long time since youā€™d been on a proper date, you were starting to lose your mind at the simple process of deciding what to wear.
Clothes were strewn across every surface of your apartment, shoes matching with jeans that matched with cardigans, tops that matched with belts and jackets.
Itā€™s 87 degrees at 5 oā€™clock, idiot. Youā€™re not wearing a jacket. Relax.
Exhausted of picking out outfits and making decisions, you collapsed on your couch and took a look at your options. You landed on an easy sundress, putting the rest of your clothes back in their respective drawers, and pulling out all of the products you were expecting to use to get ready.
You scrolled through your phone aimlessly as a notification bubble popped up on the screen.
We still on for tonight darlinā€™? Or did you change your mind?
No worries if you did. I respect that.
You let out a cackle at the message, thinking about how he must look right now. Was he nervous? Scared? Was he just looking for a controversially young fuck?
You werenā€™tā€¦ completely against that.
Didnā€™t change my mind, wouldnā€™t in a million years :)
Meet you there. Canā€™t wait to see you.
His eagerness to meet up wouldā€™ve been a red flag if it were any other run of the mill guy, but something about Joel felt special. There didnā€™t seem to be any funny business with him; too sincere to try anything other than just a good old fashioned date.
You too, cowboy.
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
When Joel showed up at the restaurant, he clenched a small bouquet of pink peonies in his right hand and checked his watch obsessively. The minutes ticked away, as he kept a high alert for anyone who could be his potential date. He knew what you looked like, of course, but this being his first time doing anything of this sort is making him hyperaware of anything going awry.
When he does lay eyes on you, his whole gaze softens. A pink sundress, hair pristinely styled and a bounce in your step that reminded him of summer. You looked like an angel, the sunset behind you painting the sky tangerine, which reflected off of the shine against your supple skin. So young, beautiful, it was taking his breath away.
ā€œJoel?ā€
Your voice matched your sweet demeanour, and he was taken out of his waking daydream.
ā€œHi,ā€ is all he can say, letting his breath out as he relaxed. ā€œYes, hi, sorry. Iā€™m Joel.ā€
ā€œHi,ā€ you laugh back, eyes darting to the flowers in his hand. They matched your dress.
ā€œThese are for you,ā€ he gets the hint, extending his arm out, and you can see the veins bulging in his forearm. He looked so much stronger in person, it was making your knees go weak.
ā€œThank you, wow,ā€ you held them up to your nose to smell the sweet aroma. ā€œI love peonies.ā€
ā€œMe too,ā€ he smiled, showing off a string of pearly white teeth, that contrasted with the pink of his lips and the even tan of his skin.
ā€œShall we?ā€ He extended his arm to you for you to grab onto, and you got to feel the warmth of his skin for yourself. Your hand wrapped around his forearm as he opened the door of the restaurant for you, leading you inside and catching a glimpse of the backs of your thighs as you walked in front of him.
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
When you were finally sitting, the conversation flowed easily. He was truly a Southern gentleman, like he had said. It wasnā€™t normal for you to open up so quickly, but Joel was so easy going and smart, he asked the right questions and knew when to listen. He knew how to listen, a warm gaze and a nod along, asking follow up questions to your answers and easily getting to know you.
You asked about his daughter, his family, his work. He was happy to tell you.Ā 
ā€œSo, whatā€™s a man like you doing being single in this city?ā€ You take a sip of the wine in the glass in front of you, burgundy staining your bottom lip.Ā 
He takes a bite of the food in front of him, a napkin pressing to his lips quickly after. ā€œBeen busy,ā€ he started to say, honey brown eyes meeting yours for a second. His gaze sent an electrifying pulse down your spine.
ā€œAnd, well, when Sarahā€™s mom left there was a ton to do,ā€ he says it nonchalantly, as if that should be something normal to happen. ā€œHouse, work, school, she keeps my hands full. Hasnā€™t been a lot of time.ā€ His syrupy drawl is pulling you in, youā€™re enticed by the way he speaks to you. So easy, warm, soft. You wonder what his hands feel like on your body, lips pressed to your neck, torso pressed against yours.
ā€œSorry, thatā€™s a lot of information for a first date,ā€ he laughs to cover the awkwardness, and quietly curses himself for going into so much detail about his precarious family situation and basically admitting to you that he hasnā€™t fucked anything other than his hand in the last 5 or so years.
ā€œNo, itā€™s okay,ā€ you slide your hand across the table, palm up, urging him to slot his hand into it. He takes it, easily, enveloping yours. His fingers find the pulse point on your wrist. You let your eyes drift up to his, drinking in the way his chest fills out the shirt he chose.
ā€œWhatā€™s your story?ā€ He asks earnestly, giving your hand a squeeze. ā€œCanā€™t imagine there isnā€™t a long line of people outside waiting to take my place, darlinā€™.ā€
You blush furiously at the nickname, and let your eyes meet his once again. ā€œYou have no idea theā€¦ mess that is out there,ā€ the wine is calling your name to take another sip at the mere thought, but you refrain. ā€œCertainly not too many I am interested in.ā€
ā€œSo, is that why youā€™re on a date with an old man on a beautiful summer night in Austin?ā€
You could tell Joel, in a twisted way, liked that you were younger than him. It made him feel younger by admission, that youā€™d want to spend time with him.Ā 
ā€œYouā€™re not that much older,ā€ you laugh, not even believing it yourself as the words left your lips. ā€œAnd I like to try new things. Donā€™t you like trying new things, sometimes?ā€
It was his turn to let his face go red at your insinuation. If only you knew how ā€˜newā€™ this really was for him, how much he was pushed out of his comfort zone right now.
You didnā€™t notice.Ā 
A little more polite small talk and exchanging of stories was all you could take before the tension was becoming too much. After another glass of wine and a shared plate of sky-high chocolate cake for dessert, you were enjoying his company and could tell he was enjoying yours all the same. When you met his gaze again, hands still intertwined, you could tell there was a question on the tip of his tongue.
ā€œWould you want toā€¦ā€œ - a nervous pause, with a halo of lust - ā€œcome back to mine for a nightcap? Iā€™ve got an empty house this evening.ā€
You couldnā€™t help but smirk, knowing in your heart that Joel mustā€™ve made arrangements for his family not to be home in anticipation. He had to have planned for you, known in his heart youā€™d say yes.
ā€œIā€™d love that.ā€
ā€§ā‚ŠĖš ā˜ļøā‹…ā™”š“‚ƒ ą£Ŗ Ö“Ö¶Öøā˜¾
Joelā€™s home is unmistakably him. It smells like a pine candle that sits near the front door and a faint aroma of laundry detergent. Thereā€™s photos everywhere, him and his daughter, his brotherā€™s family. Big windows were letting in the twinkling lights of the city outside, the inky sky making them look brighter against its canvas.
ā€œYou have a beautiful home,ā€ you say, although it seems a little formal for the situation. What else do you say to a grown-up in their house?
ā€œThank you,ā€ he takes a bottle of whiskey from the bar cart and pours two rock glasses, handing you one. He flicks on a lamp, ambient light filling the room and painting his skin amber orange, as he joins your side by his kitchen table.
ā€œI did a lot of the construction myself, the decorations are my daughter.ā€ He points lazily to the trinkets on the shelves and photos on the wall. ā€œI donā€™t really have a good eye for that type of stuff.ā€Ā 
You take a sip from the drink and it coats your throat, burning down as you suppress a cough at the taste. You nod along as he explains the design choices he made in the home, and you play along, knowing itā€™s likely out of anxiety.
ā€œWhat about upstairs?ā€
Your eyes are innocent as they meet his, although you understand the implication youā€™re making whole-heartedly. He puts his glass down on the kitchen table and you follow his lead, his strong hand around your wrist as he leads you up the stairs wordlessly.
ā€œItā€™s not anything,ā€ - he clears his throat - ā€œspecial,ā€ he shows you around the second floor, finishing at the door of his bedroom that has been left slightly ajar.Ā 
You step in quietly, leading him inside as you take in the bedroom. Neatly folded clothes, a made bed that looks well loved. Blue sheets and fluffy pillows, big bay windows that let the moonlight in.
ā€œI think itā€™s nice,ā€ you say simply, letting yourself turn around to meet his broad frame. He looks down at you slightly, eyes meeting yours as your hand drops from his grasp and snakes around his neck. His hands come up the sides of your dress, pulling it up slightly, but landing on your waist.
ā€œIs this okay?ā€ He asks tentatively in the dark of the room, his lips so close to yours already you can practically taste the whiskey on his lips for yourself. You answer him by pressing your tentative lips to his, slotting them together easily.
Joelā€™s grip on your waist tightens momentarily as he takes you in, pulling you as close as he possibly can. He can smell the perfume on your neck and the wine on your lips from earlier, and itā€™s making his need for you increase tenfold.Ā 
You pull him into you as you stumble back to let your knees hit his mattress, sitting down and letting your hands come to his belt buckle. Your hands came to undo it as he pulled his t-shirt off to throw onto the floor beside him, bending down to help you pull the dress over your shoulders to meet his t-shirt.
You made quick work of his jeans, pushing them to the ground and looking up at him with a keen glance. You could see the breath making his belly rise and fall, anticipating your touch on him any second.
When your hand wrapped around the base of his cock, his breath hitched and his head rolled back. He was already half-hard only from kissing you, so a few pumps made him easily ready for your mouth.
ā€œYouā€™re so big,ā€ is all you can think to say, head spinning from the sheer size of him right in front of your face. Your mouth watered at the way his hand palmed through your hair, pulling you in closer to him for some relief.
It was intoxicating to him, the way your mouth fit around his cock. Such a beautiful sight to see, your head licking and sucking at his tip, gathering spit there to lubricate him. His knees were going weak as he watched intently, no thought able to cross his mind, other than maybe how long it had been since heā€™d had anyone to do this with. He was going to have to pace himself if it was all like this.
Your mouth constrained around the length of him, taking him deeper and deeper with every bob of your head. Filthy sounds were filling the room now, of your eager mouth pulling him in as best you could. His hand stayed steady at the back of your head, not pushing, just softly pressed there for support. His other hand found your shoulder, pushing down your bra strap.
ā€œGod, darlinā€™,ā€ was all he could choke out, using his hand to pull you off of him. Your hand lazily stroked him as you looked up at him, spit collecting at the corners of your mouth. ā€œIā€™m not gonna last long if you keep doinā€™ that,ā€ his laugh eased some of the tension in the room, as you took your other hand and wiped the spit away.
He leaned down, pressing a fervent kiss to your lips before using his own hands to unclasp your bra and let your breasts free. His lips traveled to the side of your neck, before he was kneeled down between your legs, sucking your nipple into his mouth. He lapped at you, all consuming, as his hand came up to grasp the other breast that wasnā€™t being serviced. He moaned at the noises you were making, lewd whines into the night air that only encouraged him.Ā 
His lips made their way down your body to your clothed centre, your back against his soft sheets. You looked down at him intently, watching as he pulled your panties down your legs and immediately delved into your pussy with broad strokes of his tongue.
Your body jerked upwards at the contact, hand fisting the sheet beside you as he lapped at you, like a man starved. His expert tongue found your clit easily, sucking and licking at you for what felt like hours. You thought about his heavy cock between his legs, begging to be touched, hard as ever as he licked at you desperately.
ā€œJoel,ā€ you whined out, feeling your hand reach down to grab at his curls and push him deeper into you. That only made him moan, one hand lazily fisting his cock as the other came up to dip a finger into you, allowing you to see stars when you screwed your eyes shut.
His fingers were so large, pressed into your core as you fucked yourself on them and his tongue in tandem. He was groaning and grunting, and you hoped his neighbours couldnā€™t see into the window at the desperate filth that was going on in his bedroom.
ā€œFuck, Joel, please,ā€ you begged, but he had no mercy, and your orgasm was creeping up on you. He was ready to watch you come undone, pushing a second finger into you and furiously sucking on your clit. His other hand left his own pleasure and wrapped around your breast, pressing and playing with the hard nub there, pinching to provide a little bit of sting to it. It was sending you into another dimension.
ā€œCome for me, sweetheart,ā€ and his voice is gravely and debauched, enough to send you into your first orgasm, chanting his name and pulling on his hair. He was happily licking at you, fingers still pressing in and out as to not mess up the rhythm, as you rode out your orgasm against his face.Ā 
When you started to come down, he finally detached himself from you before standing up between your legs and pressing his broad palms to your thighs. He stayed there for a moment, cock still hard and heavy between his legs as you gazed up at him, out of breath from his work.
ā€œYouā€™re really good at that,ā€ was all you could think to say, head clouded with arousal. You moved up on the bed a little, opening your legs and pressing your knees apart to show your pussy to him again.
ā€œPlease fuck me, Joel,ā€ you breathe out, letting your hand find your own clit to rub it teasingly for him. It was still so sensitive, but the way he was looking down at you, eyes dark and stormy with need, you could almost come again just from that.
He put a knee down on the bed and crawled on top of you, his lips finding yours once again as your hands found his face. You held him there, savouring the kiss as his tongue crashed against yours, all warmth and spit and the taste of you. His hand found your breast and continued to play with your nipples, softly, coaxing more moans into his mouth from yours.
He leaned back and slipped his cock inside of you, filling you up immediately and making you gasp. He groaned into the side of your neck, tonguing the side of your ear and kissing you feverishly as he pumped in and out of you.
Your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him impossibly close, your moans filling the room as he rocked in and out of you. He kissed your jaw and chest, before reaching down between your bodies and pressing his thick finger to your clit again, using the wetness there to draw circles around your sensitive nub.
ā€œSo pretty,ā€ he smiles into your neck, your hand on the back of his, playing with the now-sweaty strands of hair on the nape. ā€œSo pretty for me, taking my cock,ā€ the dirty talking is welcome as he continues to bring you closer to a second orgasm, your breath hitching once again.
ā€œCome inside of me,ā€ you say it like a whisper, a secret in the stillness of the room, and Joel is unsure he even heard you correctly.
ā€œAre you sure?ā€ He says it not accusingly, but in a way that conveys he feels like he just won the lottery.
ā€œYes, please, fill me up.ā€
You can see the way his eyes darken more, shifting so heā€™s on his knees and using your body to fuck himself on his thick cock. His hand continued to play with your clit, bringing you so close to your orgasm that tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. His cheeks were getting hot as he thrusted in and out furiously, and you could almost see the stress melt off of his face as he came close to his own undoing.
The white-hot feeling washes over you once again, eyes shutting before youā€™re back on your elbows and watching intently. Your whole body feels like itā€™s on fire as his thrusts become sloppy, your name pouring out of his lips like a prayer. Youā€™re clenching around him and letting him ride out his high alongside you, slowing after his hot cum coats your walls and leaves you full of him.
He collapses on top of you, cock softening inside as you both catch your breath together. Your chests are sticky with sweat as you breathe, taking in the smell of him, and the feel of his warmth on your body.
He pulls himself from you and flops beside you, still taking a moment to admire you. You look over at him, a lazy smile on your face as your hand reaches out to caress the skin of his chest. He takes the time to run his fingertips up your arms and back as you lay there in silence together, just soaking in the moment in a post-sex glow.
ā€œI guess I should get going,ā€ you say after a few beats, sitting up to grab your dress off the floor. You cringe at the thought of throwing your underwear on and leaving, this being just another random hookup for you that never lead to anything. Joel was sweet.
A confused look spreads across his features and his brows knit together, before sitting up next to you at the edge of the bed.
ā€œI mean, I donā€™t know how these things usually go,ā€ he laughs, as his hand finds your lower back. ā€œBut you donā€™t gotta run outta here like a scared animal or somethinā€™.ā€
You look up at him again, unsure of what to do next. In your, albeit limited, experience with dating app hookups, you were expected to leave pretty much right after.
ā€œOh, um,ā€ you look around the room at the soft worn-in sheets and the TV across from Joelā€™s bed. You take a look at him again, your eyes meeting his to match his gaze, where you can tell heā€™s mentally begging that youā€™ll stay the night.
ā€œI mean, if you donā€™t mind, Iā€™d be happy to stay.ā€ Joel smiled lopsidedly and let his hand rub soothing circles at your lower back.Ā 
ā€œIā€™ll make it worth your while,ā€ he laughs, stepping over to go into the bathroom and warm up a cloth for the mess spilling out from between your legs. ā€œI wouldnā€™t mind wakinā€™ up and doing all that again tomorrow.ā€
You laugh and lay back onto his bed as he presses the warm cloth to your pussy, his lips once again finding yours to pull you in for a sweet kiss.Ā 
You nod, sliding between the comfortable sheets as Joel runs downstairs to grab your abandoned drinks as well as a couple of bottles of ice cold water. He slips into the sheets next to you, not bothering to throw on any pajamas (not that you were complaining), and settling in beside you. After a few gulps of water, you nestled into his chest and let your hand find his tummy, resting on it as you listened to the even pattern of his breath.
ā€œWe should do this again. Like, after tomorrow morning.ā€ you say quietly as youā€™re drifting in and out of sleep. His fingertips continues to slide across your arm and give you goosebumps as you snuggled closer into him, hearing a laugh exhale out of his nose and feeling a kiss press to the top of your head.Ā 
In his sleepy, deep southern drawl, he replies. ā€œDonā€™t have to ask me twice, darlinā€™.ā€
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cupidbedsy Ā· 2 months ago
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āžŖ summary: after being stood up, y/n was planning on just spending her night crying on the curb before she went home. that was until five boys showed up and took her out.
āžŖ warnings: reader gets stood up, mentions of cheating, trevor is such a flirt, reader has chemistry with all five of them, definitely typos/not proofread
āžŖ word count: 5.3k
āžŖ file type: new fic
āžŖ sunny's notes: the first fic since i've left. guys you have no idea how in love i am with this. i got this idea based on a tiktok (at least the first part was, the fair part was all me) but i love this so so so much and i hope you guys do too. okay two things that i am willing to do with this, write and give you guys the letters each of them write and/or a part two where she gets together with one of them (who, you let me know)
Ā© cupidbedsy (sunflower-lilac42) ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here
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She hadn't meant to end up on the curb, mascara streaking down her cheeks as the city buzzed around her, but here she was, wishing she'd never agreed to the date in the first place. She shoved her phone roughly into the pocket of her jacket, curling herself into it further. She turned her attention to the cracks in the sidewalk, tracing the lines and picking at the grass that grew out of some of them.Ā 
When she got bored of that she wrapped her arms around her knees and just buried her head into them, listening to the cars passing by and the distant music from the bar a couple of buildings down. She could hear muffled laughter and talking drawing closer but she was too distracted to care.Ā 
Meanwhile, the group of guys was walking down the sidewalk laughing about a joke one of them had said. They had just been wandering around trying to figure out what they should do that night. It was Luke who spotted the girl first, he paused once his gaze landed on her. At first he thought nothing of it, merely shrugged it off as just someone who was drunk way too early into the night.Ā 
But as the group neared closer, he could hear the soft sniffles and immediately reached his hand out to stop Jack, who was walking beside him, ā€œWhat?ā€
Jack raised his eyebrow as he followed Lukeā€™s gaze to where the girl was sitting. He looked back at his younger brother and then back at the girl, ā€œWhat is it?ā€
ā€œSheā€™s crying, dumbass.ā€
The conversation halted the other threeā€™s movements, their laughter slowly fading. They made their way back over to the two, making a little huddle as they discussed what they should do, ā€œShould we do something?ā€
Quinn crossed his arms, slightly worried about the girl even if she was just a stranger. He listened to the others talk before walking up to her, ignoring the groupā€™s sounds of protests, ā€œHey.ā€
The girl jumped slightly, rushing to wipe the tears from her face as she looked up at him, ā€œHi.ā€
ā€œAre you okay?ā€
She looked back down, eyes fixed on her sweater covered hands, before she mumbled, ā€œIā€™m fine.ā€ She picked at the loose strings coming from the edge of the sleeves, oblivious to the looks and mouthed words the boys were exchanging.Ā 
When minutes had passed she finally looked back up to see the five now completely surrounding her. She could tell they had been planning on going out somewhere, probably having a lot more fun then she wouldā€™ve had even if her date had shown up. A few of them sent her an awkward smile while the one she had talked to and one of the taller ones sent her genuine ones.Ā 
ā€œWe didnā€™t mean to bother you,ā€ Luke said, ā€œWe were just wondering if you were okay.ā€
Y/n nodded, ā€œIā€™m fineā€¦ just a bad night, I guess.ā€
Trevor raised his eyebrows, ā€œJust a bad night?ā€ Jack hit him in the stomach and smiled at the girl apologetically, ā€œSorry about him.ā€
She cracked a small smile, the first one since she arrived at the shitty bar two hours ago. Cole took this as an invitation to offer what they had been talking about earlier, ā€œWe were going to go get some pizza, do you want to come with?ā€
She moved her eyes to each one, all of them now having a smile on their face, a sincere one. She blinked, slightly surprised at how willing they were to offer her to come with, ā€œI donā€™t want to ruin your nightā€¦ā€
ā€œYou wouldnā€™t be ruining anything,ā€ Trevor chimed in, ā€œWe were just figuring out what to do anyway, no plans whatsoever.ā€
She hesitated, still unsure, but as she looked up at them sheĀ  couldnā€™t deny that going to get pizza with five random guys would be better than sitting on the curb alone in the cold. She nodded and whispered, ā€œOkay. Pizza sounds good.ā€
Luke flashed a grin, holding his hand out to her, ā€œCome on, letā€™s get out of here.ā€Ā 
She took his hand, using it as an aid to stand up. The four immediately fell into step beside them, making small talk with y/n as they made their way down the street. Luke never strayed far from her, occasionally tightening the grip he still had on her hand.Ā 
ā€œWhatā€™s your favorite kind of pizza?ā€ Cole stepped closer to her, leaving Jack behind to continue talking to Quinn.Ā 
She shrugged at first before speaking softly, ā€œJust cheese.ā€
Trevor came up behind her too, wrapping an arm around her shoulders as he pushed Luke out of the way, ā€œPlain cheese. My kind of girl.ā€
She laughed at his comment, catching her footing as Trevor leaned on her. They all continued their walk to the pizza place, stepping in and immediately being hit with the smell of pizza. THey found a table near the back and sat down, placing their drink order with the waiter that came by.Ā 
ā€œSo, what had you sitting on the curb crying?ā€
She tensed slightly, not sure if she should actually tell them but she looked at all of their gazes and noticed how genuine all of them looked so she spoke up, ā€œI was supposed to go on a date tonight. But he stood me up.ā€
They all collectively scoffed, ā€œWhat an ass?ā€
ā€œHe doesnā€™t know what he was missing out on.ā€
She laughed, ā€œYou guys donā€™t even know me.ā€
ā€œSo? It doesnā€™t take a genius to figure out youā€™re a good person.ā€
Quinn, who had noticed the sadness still lingering in her eyes, inserted himself into the conversation, ā€œIā€™m assuming thatā€™s not it?ā€
She smiled sadly, ā€œIt wouldā€™ve been my first date in a monthā€¦ since my ex cheated on me.ā€
The five of them stared at her with wide eyes, ā€œNo fucking way.ā€
ā€œYep.ā€ Before anyone got a chance to say something, the waiter came around and handed out their drinks before taking their pizza order.Ā 
The waiter walked away and she immediately said something before they could, ā€œSo what about you? Who are the five guys that mysteriously decided to take me under their wing for the night?ā€
ā€œWell Iā€™m Jack, this is my older brother Quinn and my younger brother Luke. And these are my best friends Cole and Trevor.ā€
They all waved as Jack said their names, smiling awkwardly in return. They all slowly got to know each other, y/n finding out they all played hockey and which teams they played on. She got told many childhood stories, especially about the three brothers since they had known each other for the longest obviously. Eventually, they got their pizza and continued their conversation as they ate.Ā 
When they were done they slowly headed out the door, paying for their meal beforehand. They all stood outside the pizza place and exchanged glances with one another, ā€œSo now what?ā€
ā€œWell, I should probably head homeā€¦ā€
ā€œNonsense!ā€ Jack screamed, ā€œCome on letā€™s go do something. You still need some cheering up.ā€
ā€œThank you but I donā€™t want to impose more than I already have.ā€
They all shook their heads, ā€œNah, come on. Letā€™s go to the fair.ā€
She was hesitant once again but she saw all of their pleading looks and gave in immediately, ā€œAlright fine. Letā€™s go.ā€
The five of them cheered and immediately took off down the street, y/nā€™s laughter filling their ears.
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They six arrived at the fair, y/n looking around in awe. It had been a while since sheā€™d been to a fair or carnival, the bright lights overwhelming her in the slightest. She followed behind the guys, not knowing where exactly she, or they, were heading. She watched from behind them as they hit each other playfully and laughed before Cole fell behind and walked alongside her, ā€œHey.ā€
ā€œHi.ā€ She looked up at him and furrowed her eyebrows, ā€œWhatā€™s up?ā€
ā€œHow much do you like rides?ā€
ā€œDepends on which one.ā€
ā€œFerris wheel, swings, tilt-a-whirl.ā€
ā€œFerris wheel it is.ā€
Cole called out to his friends, ā€œHey! Weā€™re going on the ferris wheel. Weā€™ll meet up with you later.ā€
The other four waved him off and y/n smiled at him, ā€œLead the way Caufield.ā€
Cole practically dragged her in the direction of the ride, hearing her laugh behind him. She squealed as she almost ran into people, yelling out apologies as they passed by. He never let up, continuing his fast paced walk, or run as y/n called it, through the crowds. She told him to slow down multiple times and even then he would only slow his pace in the slightest.
Once they finally arrived there, she panted, ā€œJeez. Are you trying to kill me?ā€
ā€œNo! I was just really excited. Now come on before the lines get too long.ā€ She nodded and continued her pursuit after him, managing to get in line before the crowd started to gather.Ā 
Cole grinned at her as they stood in line and y/n couldnā€™t help the laugh that escaped her. Cole looked at her and his grin turned crooked, ā€œWhat?ā€
ā€œHas anyone told you how contagious your energy is?ā€
He shrugged, ā€œSometimes.ā€
The two continued to stand in silence, y/n gazing around at the multitude of booths that surrounded her. Some were selling food, deep fried twinkies or churros, she made a mental note to come back later to satisfy her sweet tooth. Others were selling trinkets or shirts or bracelets. She looked around at all the people, some little kids bouncing up and down with happiness as they held their parents hands, a group of teens who were taking pictures on a polaroid camera, and a couple who were holding hands and wearing matching t-shirts. Her smile quickly faded from her face and turned into a frown.
Cole noticed the sudden change in her demeanor and he didnā€™t let it last long, ā€œSo, youā€™ve ever been on a ferris wheel.ā€
She looked back at him, smiling softly, ā€œYeah, a few times, but itā€™s been a while. I forgot how much fun fairs were, I used to go as a kid with my family.ā€
ā€œTheyā€™re the best, especially at night when you reach the top and can see almost the whole fair from up there. Magic or something.ā€
ā€œMagic huh?ā€ A teasing smile played on her lips as she nudged him.Ā 
ā€œHey! Donā€™t judge me. Itā€™s true.ā€
She just continued to smile as she faced forward, watching as the line continued to move quicker and quicker. Before she knew it, it was her and Coleā€™s turn to get on, the two of them quickly sitting in their seats and watching as the worker closed the cabin door. It was just Cole and y/nĀ  in there, sitting across from one another.Ā 
ā€œWhatā€™s your favorite part?ā€ She looked over at him with curious eyes.
He smiled once more before answering, ā€œWhen you get to the top and are lucky enough that thatā€™s where it stops you.ā€
She nodded in agreement before looking out the booth, ā€œThatā€™s my favorite part too.ā€
The two fell into a comfortable silence as the wheel took them around twice before finally stopping at the top. Her breath hitched as they stopped, not expecting it in the slightest. She couldnā€™t help but think back to Coleā€™s words earlier, it was truly magical. Every noise seemed to fall deaf on her ears as she gazed out at the lights shining brightly, the mass of people running around below her.Ā 
ā€œI told you.ā€
She hummed as she looked over at him, ā€œYeah you did. And for the record I never said you were wrong.ā€
A few moments passed before she spoke again, ā€œThank youā€¦ for this, for tonight.ā€
ā€œNo need to thank me, Iā€™m glad we ran into you.ā€
Thatā€™s when the ride started to move again, bringing the two of them back to the ground. The ride worker smiled at them once more as they climbed out and waved goodbye before helping the next group of people in the car. Cole and y/n laughed as they stumbled down the road, his hand brushing up against hers. The two blushed in unison, looking down before continuing to walk down the street.Ā 
ā€œWant to go find the others?ā€ Y/n nodded but slowed her pace in the slightest, ā€œBut letā€™s take our time, hm? Weā€™re not in any rush are we?ā€
Cole grinned again, ā€œNot one bit.ā€
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When they finally found the group of them, they were in the part of the fair that hosted a majority of the carnival games. Jack swung an arm around her, ā€œWell look whoā€™s back. The girl of the hour!ā€
She blushed again as everyoneā€™s gaze fell upon her, ā€œHi.ā€
ā€œSo how was the ferris wheel?ā€ Trevor teased as he took a sip of his drink, his raised eyebrows still visible from behind the cup.
ā€œGood.ā€
ā€œMhm, what y/n said.ā€ He glared slightly at Trevor but kept his cool for the most part.Ā 
ā€œHavenā€™t been on a ferris wheel in a while, it was fun.ā€
ā€œI bet,ā€ Trevor mumbled again and received a smack on the head from Quinn.Ā 
ā€œSo, what do you guys want to do next?ā€ Luke interrupted, slightly ticked off from both Trevorā€™s antics and the blush that was on Cole and y/nā€™s face.Ā 
They all looked at the girlā€™s face as her eyes wandered up and down the street awaiting her decision. Her gaze finally landed back on them before she spoke, ā€œWhoā€™s good at games?ā€
Four of the five of them stepped back immediately at her words leaving Luke the only one standing, ā€œI guess thatā€™s me.ā€
She took ahold of his hand and dragged him down the way to one of the games, Luke only able to send a wave quickly as he stumbled after her. He watched as she talked animatedly about the carnival games, something along the lines of never being able to win one. Something clicked in his brain and he knew he wanted to win something for her.Ā 
They finally reached one of the booths, the two of them coming to a stop immediately, ā€œDo you think you can win?ā€
She looked up at him with hopeful eyes, ā€œIā€™ve been trying since I was a kid.ā€
He nodded, a small part of him knowing there was a chance he wouldnā€™t be able to but he sure as hell was determined to win. She watched as he stepped up to the worker, handing her a few bucks before picking up the miniature basketballs.Ā 
One after another he missed but his confidence never waivered even as he continued to hand the worker money. After the third try, y/n stepped up and placed her hand on his arm, ā€œCome on, Luke. Itā€™s useless at this point.ā€
ā€œOne more. I promise.ā€
She relented and allowed him to hand the worker more money before picking the basketballs up again. This time, all the ones he threw made it into the wooden baskets and he cheered before bringing her into a hug and pointing up at the prizes, ā€œWhich one do you want?ā€
She smiled up at him, ā€œThe purple cow. Please.ā€
The worker nodded and took it down before handing it to the girl who beamed as she took it into her arms, ā€œFinally. After 18 plus years.ā€
He laughed at her, watching as she played with the stuffed animalā€™s floppy ears, ā€œYou know I donā€™t think cows are supposed to have floppy ears.ā€
He wrapped his arm around her shoulder and she immediately found comfort in the gesture, ā€œWhatever, itā€™s cute.ā€
Luke looked down at her and smiled softly, ā€œYeah, sure is.ā€
Oblivious to Lukeā€™s gaze and true meaning of his words, she spoke, ā€œCā€™mon letā€™s go show everyone what you won me. My hero.ā€
He chuckled again before leading her back to the group but going as slow as possible to not have to completely leave her side too early. She looked back up at him with a playful smirk, ā€œSo Luke, is this your secret talent? Winning impossible carnival games?ā€
He laughed, shaking his head, ā€œNot this time. I think I just got lucky.ā€
ā€œLucky huh? Or maybe youā€™re just too stubborn to give upā€¦ā€ She urged.
He shrugged, ā€œMaybe a little bit of both. But it was worth it to see you smile like that.ā€
A new blush rose to her cheeks and she changed her gaze to the ground, letting Luke guide her through the crowds, clutching the stuffed cow even closer to her.
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ā€œLook what Luke won me!ā€ She hopped over to the group of boys who snapped their heads to look at her.Ā 
They nodded, less enthusiastic than the girl but still trying to make it seem like they were. Quinn was the first one, ā€œHow long did it take him?ā€
Luke rolled his eyes at his older brother, ā€œOh shut up.ā€
ā€œI was just asking!ā€
Y/n shook her head at the banter and stepped away as they continued to argue back and forth. She ended up next to Jack who immediately took notice that she was now by his side, ā€œHey there.ā€
ā€œHi.ā€
For a while they didnā€™t say anything, just watching the fight between Luke and Quinn. Then y/n nudged his side and whispered in his ear, ā€œFried Twinkie?ā€
He nodded and grinned walking away with her towards the food. The two made their way down, a lot of the crowd had dispersed to the shows now that they had started. There was a small line forming outside of the food truck that sold the fried twinkies, so the two just stood and made small talk as they waited, ā€œSoā€¦ fried twinkies, huh? Your go-to carnival snack?ā€
ā€œYep, always has been. Itā€™s a classic, too. Iā€™ve been eyeing them since I got to the ferris wheel with Cole.ā€
ā€œAlways has been? How many times have you been?ā€
They moved up with the line and she shoved her hands in the pockets of her shorts, ā€œI used to go all the time with my family when we were kids, but when my siblings grew up and started relenting ā€˜family quality timeā€™ we just stopped kind of going.ā€
Jack nodded, ā€œYeah, I feel that. I mean once we all started to get more serious about hockey we all just kind of forgot to do stuff like that, or at least it was hard to go out without people recognizing us.ā€
They finally reached the front of the line, the vendor smiling at them happily as he rang up the two fried twinkies. Y/n watched as Jack swiped his card, grateful that the boys had been basically spoiling her since they picked her up on the side of the street. It was hard to believe that this all happened because someone stood her up but she couldnā€™t find it in herself to care at this point.Ā 
She jumped slightly when she noticed Jackā€™s hand wave in front of her face, ā€œLost you there for a sec. Here is your fried Twinkie, mā€™lady.ā€
ā€œWhy thank you kind sir.ā€Ā 
The two made their way over to one of the many benches that was set up on the grass. Y/n sat the purple cow on the table next to her, taking a bite of the treat, ā€œI forgot how good these were.ā€
ā€œI forgot how bad for you these are.ā€
ā€œOh come on, you canā€™t tell me you donā€™t indulge in something sweet once in a while, especially since itā€™s the summer.ā€
Jack smirked, ā€œI never said that. I just meant that this is fucking greasy as hell.ā€
She only nodded, taking another bite. The two sat in silence as they ate and then she saw Jackā€™s hand reaching out, ā€œWhatā€™re-ā€
His thumb landed on the corner of her mouth, wiping some of the filling of the twinkie away, ā€œYou got a little something there.ā€
Her cheeks flushed at the action, though she couldnā€™t tell if she was embarrassed or flustered. Once they were done, they threw their trash away and y/n resumed her grasp on her cow, ā€œThanks for coming with me.ā€
ā€œā€˜Course, Iā€™m glad youā€™re having a great time. You deserve it, especially afterā€¦ well you know.ā€
She frowned slightly and nodded, ā€œYeah.ā€
ā€œHey come on. No frowns anymore. The night isnā€™t over yet!ā€
ā€œOh, itā€™s not?ā€
ā€œNope! I heard there was this karaoke or dance thing happening soon, weā€™re definitely going. Letā€™s go find the guys.ā€
She lagged at his words and ran after him.
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The two ran up to the group, Jack practically crashing into Cole, ā€œWhoops sorry.ā€
Cole shoved him back and y/n laughed at the interaction, ā€œAlright so whatā€™s this I hear about dancing?ā€
ā€œWell we were going to go to karaoke, but someone said no.ā€
Eyes turned to Luke who shrugged innocently, ā€œWhat? I donā€™t really want to get on stage and sing in front of a bunch of people.ā€
ā€œBuzzkill. But thereā€™s a band performing right now so we figured weā€™d go check that out.ā€
Y/n nodded, ā€œAkright.ā€
The six of them made their way through the fair, walking to one of the many stages they had there. Y/n reached for the closest hand, which happened to be Quinnā€™s, scared of getting lost in the crowds. Quinn looked down at her and smiled gently, ā€œNervous?ā€
ā€œYeah, just a little overwhelmed.ā€
He squeezed her hand, ā€œWell I got you.ā€
A pink tint covered her cheeks for what seemed like the hundredth time that night. They navigated their way close to the middle of the group, nodding their heads along to the beat of whatever song the band was playing.Ā 
As they settled into the middle of the crowd, the energy of the live music began to seep into Y/Nā€™s bones. The band was playing an upbeat, catchy tune that had the entire audience swaying and moving along to the rhythm. Y/n finally let herself relax into the swing of the crowd.
Quinn, still holding her hand, leaned down to be heard over the music. ā€œFeeling better?ā€
She nodded, giving him a grateful smile. ā€œYeah, thanks. This is actually pretty fun.ā€
ā€œGood,ā€ he replied, his eyes twinkling with warmth.
As the band transitioned into a slower, more melodic song, Y/N noticed that couples around them started to pair off, swaying together in time with the music. She hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do, but before she could overthink it, Jack nudged her playfully.
ā€œCome on, Y/N,ā€ he said with a grin. ā€œYou canā€™t just stand there. Dance with us!ā€
Before she could respond, Jack took her other hand, spinning her around playfully before pulling her into a gentle sway. Quinn didnā€™t let go of her other hand, so she found herself dancing between the two of them, feeling a bit like she was in a scene from a movie.
ā€œSee? Not so bad, right?ā€ Jack said, his voice light and teasing.
ā€œNot bad at all,ā€ she agreed, laughing as they continued to sway together.
Cole, Trevor, and Luke were nearby, each of them doing their own version of dancing, Trevor of course going completely against the rhythm of the music. As the song progressed, Jack eventually stepped back, letting Quinn take over fully. Y/N looked up at him, their eyes meeting in a way that made her heart flutter. The earlier awkwardness sheā€™d felt was gone, replaced by a sense of comfort.
ā€œYouā€™re a pretty good dancer,ā€ she commented, trying to keep the conversation light even as her heart raced.
Quinn chuckled, his hand still holding hers as they moved together to the music. ā€œThanks. I guess all those weddings and family events paid off.ā€
She smiled, feeling a warmth spread through her chest that had nothing to do with the summer night air. ā€œWell, you all are definitely making this night unforgettable.ā€
Quinnā€™s gaze softened, and for a moment, it felt like they were the only two people in the crowd. ā€œIā€™m glad. You deserve it.ā€
ā€œThat is the second time someone has said that to me tonight.ā€
ā€œOh really?ā€ Quinnā€™s eyes shined with amusement, ā€œI guess that means itā€™s true.ā€
As the song came to an end, they slowly stopped swaying, neither of them eager to let go. But the upbeat music quickly returned, and the moment passed, replaced by the lively energy of the fair.
Jack reappeared, playfully pulling Y/N away from Quinn with a grin. ā€œAlright, enough of the slow stuff. Letā€™s see if you can keep up with me!ā€
She laughed, letting him drag her back into the group where they all started dancing together, the worries of the earlier part of the night completely forgotten. They spent the next hour losing themselves in the music, joking around, and simply enjoying each otherā€™s company.
By the time the band announced their final song, Y/N was out of breath, her cheeks flushed from both the exertion and the pure joy she felt. She couldnā€™t remember the last time sheā€™d had this much fun, or felt this free. And as the music wound down, the crowd began to disperse, yet the six of them had stayed together, watching everyone push their way out to the entrance of the fair.
Y/n all of a sudden felt heavy and she could feel herself growing increasingly tired. Trevor was the first to notice this, immediately taking a position by her side and letting her lay against him, ā€œSomeoneā€™s getting tired.ā€ His voice was light and teasing as he looked down at her.
She mumbled something incoherently, digging her face into the boyā€™s shoulder. The five of them laughed at her before agreeing to head back to the car. Trevor and Quinn took the main job of helping her walk back to the parking lot, all of them equally as tired as the girl, their feet aching.Ā 
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When they reached the car, Luke climbed into the back seat and watched as Trevor and Quinn helped the girl into the middle row. Trevor sat in the middle, Y/n on his left and Cole on his right, as Quinn hopped into the driverā€™s seat with Jack in the passenger side.Ā 
Trevor shook her slightly, trying to get her to wake enough so she could tell them where she lived or where to drop her off. Y/n blinked her eyes open slowly, looking up at him, ā€œHm?ā€
ā€œGotta tell us where to take you, pretty girl.ā€
ā€œWanna sleep.ā€
Trevor chuckled, ā€œI know you do and you can once you tell us where you live.ā€Ā 
He slid a phone into her hands and she slowly typed out her address into the search bar of the maps before handing it back to him. He thanked her and handed the phone to Jack who then plugged the phone into one of the charging cords, Siriā€™s voice making its way to everyoneā€™s ears through the speakers.Ā 
Y/n resummed her position laying against Trevor. She shivered slightly, the drastic temperature change affecting her greatly. Trevor let a smile tug at his lips as he reached into the backseat where Luke was to place it around her. She whispered a ā€˜thanksā€™ before resuming her previous action, curling into his side.
Although she was tired, her mind didnā€™t seem to allow her to sleep so she opened her eyes and tried to find something to focus on. Her gaze landed upon Trevorā€™s arm, the one littered with tattoos. She couldnā€™t help but be mesmerized by them and she let her eyes trace up the length of his forearm to his bicep.Ā 
Trevor could feel her stare and finally looked back over to her before speaking softly, ā€œWhatā€™s on your mind?ā€
ā€œNothin.ā€
ā€œI can feel you looking, sweetheart.ā€
She blushed at the nickname although the only tell tale sign was whenever they would pass a street light that lit up her face. He chuckled at her shyness before nudging her again, ā€œYou can touch if you want princess. I donā€™t mind.ā€
Y/n looked up at him, ā€œReally?ā€
He nodded, ā€œGo ahead.ā€
She hesitated at first before letting her hand lay atop his arm, her fingers slowly beginning to trace the ink. She let the silence comfort her and slowly lull her to sleep to start with but then the question burned at the back of her mind, ā€œDo they mean anything?ā€
ā€œYes and no, but mostly no. Just things I thought were cool I guess.ā€
She let out a soft murmur of amusement and continued the path of the shapes his arm had. Slowly she fell asleep and before she knew it they were pulling up to her apartment. Trevor had to be careful with maneuvering her but eventually he was able to pick her up and carry her up the stairs.Ā 
As respectful as Luke could, he reached into her pocket to pull out her keys and unlocked the door. Quinn, Jack, Cole and Luke trailed behind Trevor, all of them finding their way to her bedroom. The five exchanged looks as they stood watching her, ā€œShould we leave or note or something?ā€
ā€œProbably. I donā€™t know how much sheā€™s going to remember when she wakes up.ā€
The others nodded in agreement and slowly filled out of her bedroom but not before kissing her softly on the head and making sure the covers surrounded her entirely and that the curtains in her room were closed all the way.Ā 
They reached the kitchen and searched for pieces of paper, each of them writing their own note with their name and phone number scribbled underneath it. It wasnā€™t the neatest thing they ever wrote, especially considering that it was mostly dark inside the apartment. Soon after they all left, making sure the lock was secure before walking back to the car and driving away.
ļ¾Ÿ+*:ą­Øą­§:*ļ¹¤
In the morning, y/n woke up groaning slightly. She couldnā€™t remember what had happened last night except for the fact that she had been stood up. She sat up in bed and looked down at her arms which were clad in a sweatshirt she didnā€™t recognize. Slowly the memories of the previous night slowly came back to her and she couldnā€™t help the smile that graced her face.Ā 
She got out of bed and walked to the kitchen, now noticing that she didnā€™t know if she would ever see the five again. That was until she noticed the five pieces of paper laid out on her kitchen counter, all in different handwriting.Ā 
She made her way over to the counter, sitting at one of the chairs she had there and taking her time reading each note individually. The smile was predominantly stuck to her face as she typed each number into her phone, creating contacts for each of them.Ā 
Finally, she made a group chat with all of them before sending a text, ā€œHey, this is y/n. Thank you all for last night, it meant a lot to me. I hope it wasnā€™t just a one time thing, I would enjoy seeing you all again.ā€
And within minutes of her sending the text, all of them had hearted her message and sent her each a message.
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heartysworld Ā· 4 months ago
Text
The Deal // Lando Norris
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A/N: I'm literary writing this as the England-Spain final is happening so I've got absolutely no idea whether I'm going to jinx it or guess the winner but I guess we're about to find out!
Lando Norris x Fem!Reader
MASTERLIST
W.C. 2k
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The week between the Silverstone and the Hungarian Grand Prix was a much needed break in the intense Formula 1 schedule. Half the racing season was over, and you and Lando both needed a distraction from the relentless grind of the sport. It was the perfect opportunity to do something fun, to escape the pressure, and enjoy a few days just for yourselves.
ā€œAlright baby, I have a proposition,ā€ Lando said one evening as you both relaxed on the couch in your shared apartment, the remnants of a takeout dinner spread out before you. His fingers were gently running through your hair, and you could feel the tension of the season easing away.
ā€œOh? Do tell,ā€ you replied, looking up at him with a smirk, already intrigued by whatever he was about to suggest.
ā€œYou know how youā€™ve been dying to go see aĀ  Taylor Swift concert?ā€ he began, a mischievous glint in his eye. You could already tell where thus was going.
ā€œObviously,ā€ you replied, excitement bubbling up at the mere mention of it.
ā€œWell, Iā€™ve been thinkingā€¦ What if we make a deal? We go to the Taylor Swift concert in Milan, but the next day, we head to Germany for the Euro Cup final. I'm sure we can figure something out regarding the concert tickets. Deal?ā€ he proposed, his smile widening as he extended his hand towards to as a form of an agreement.
Your heart did a little flip. The idea of seeing Taylor Swift live had been a dream for you, and combining that with Landoā€™s passion for football seemed like the perfect plan for the remaining time before the next race in Hungary.
ā€œYouā€™ve got yourself a deal, Mr. Norris,ā€ you agreed, shaking his hand in a mock-serious manner.
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The days leading up to the trip were filled with excitement and anticipation. You both packed your bags, making sure to include all the essentials ā€“ your Taylor Swift outfit and Landoā€™s favorite football jerseys. For a bit of fun, you had even gotten Lando a shirt that said, ā€œSo many Sainz, so little time,ā€ a playful nod to his friendship with Carlos.
Finally, the day arrived. You and Lando boarded the flight to Milan, the city buzzing with the same energy that coursed through your veins. After checking into the hotel you'd be staying at, you quickly changed into your concert outfits. You wore a beautiful flowy dress that sparkled in pink and blue hues and twirled as you walked, while Lando sported his new shirt with pride.
As you arrived at the concert venue, the atmosphere was electric. Fans were everywhere, their excitement palpable. You grabbed Landoā€™s hand, your eyes sparkling with joy.
ā€œThis is it, Lando! I canā€™t believe weā€™re really here,ā€ you exclaimed, squeezing his hand.
ā€œI know, love. Letā€™s make the most of it,ā€ he replied, pulling you closer as you navigated through the crowd to find your VIP seats.
The concert was everything youā€™d dreamed of and more. Taylor Swiftā€™s voice filled the arena, her energy was infectious. You sang along to every song, your voice mingling with thousands of others. Despite not knowing all the lyrics, Lando joined in with your enthusiasm, dancing and cheering with you.
During ā€œLove Story,ā€ Lando placed his hands on your waist and twirled you around, his eyes never leaving yours. You laughed, your heart feeling light and free. The moment was perfect, a memory youā€™d treasure forever.
ā€œThank you for this, Lando. This means the world to me,ā€ you said, your voice barely audible over the music.
ā€œAnything for you, Y/N,ā€ he replied, leaning in to kiss you softly.
Throughout the concert, fans recognized Lando and started handing him friendship bracelets. By the end of the night, both his hands were covered with colorful, handmade bracelets given to him by enthusiastic Swifties. The sight of Lando, a Formula 1 driver, adorned with friendship bracelets made you smile.
When ā€œShake It Offā€ started playing, you couldnā€™t contain your excitement. You jumped up and down, hugging Lando tightly, and he joined in, laughing and dancing along with you. Unbeknownst to you both, several people in the audience captured photos and videos of you two, sharing your unfiltered joy.
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The next day, you were up early, the excitement of the previous night still lingering. After a quick breakfast, you and Lando hopped on a flight to Germany. Unfortunately, time wasn't on your side and you had no chance to explore the beautiful city of Milan with the love of your life. However, this led to Lando's idea for a vacation in Milan during his summer break.
The Euro Cup final was an event Lando had been looking forward to for months, and you were determined to make it just as special for him as the concert had been for you.
As you arrived at the stadium, the sheer scale of it took your breath away. Fans from all over the world were gathered, their team colors proudly displayed. You wore a jersey in support of Landoā€™s home country, earning an appreciative smile from him.
ā€œReady for this?ā€ you asked, taking his hand as you made your way to your seats.
ā€œAbsolutely. This is going to be epic,ā€ he replied, his excitement evident.
The match was intense, the atmosphere charged with energy. England was facing Spain, and the tension was palpable. You found yourself getting caught up in the excitement, cheering and shouting alongside Lando. When England scored the winning goal, the stadium erupted in celebration. Lando lifted you up in a jubilant hug, spinning you around.
ā€œWe did it!ā€ he exclaimed, his eyes alight with joy.
ā€œYou did it,ā€ you corrected, laughing as you hugged him tightly. ā€œThis was incredible, Lando. Iā€™m so glad we came.ā€
ā€œMe too, love. This has been the perfect weekend,ā€ he replied, kissing you deeply.
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Later, as you made your way back to the hotel, fans also captured moments of Lando jumping and cheering, celebrating England's victory. Videos of his infectious excitement quickly spread online, fans delighted by the sight of him in his element.
Back in your room, you cuddled up on the bed, exhausted but happy. Lando pulled you close, his arms wrapped around you protectively.
ā€œI love you, Y/N,ā€ he whispered, his voice filled with emotion.
ā€œI love you too, Lando. Thank you for everything,ā€ you replied, snuggling closer.
As you drifted off to sleep, you knew that this weekend would be one youā€™d both remember for the rest of your lives ā€“ a testament to your love, your shared passions, and the joy of making deals that brought you closer together.
The next morning, you woke up to a flurry of notifications on your phone. Curious, you opened social media to find that videos and photos of you and Lando from both the concert and the football match had gone viral. Fans couldnā€™t stop talking about how cute you both looked together, enjoying something you each loved.
There were clips of you dancing and twirling to ā€œLove Story,ā€ Landoā€™s hands on your waist, and another of you jumping up and down, hugging him tightly during ā€œShake It Off.ā€ Then, there were the heartwarming videos of Lando cheering and jumping when England won, his pure joy infectious.
ā€œLooks like weā€™re famous,ā€ you said, showing Lando your phone. He chuckled, pulling you into another hug.
ā€œI guess the world likes seeing us happy,ā€ he said, kissing your forehead.
And as you lay there, wrapped up in each other, you couldnā€™t help but feel grateful for these perfect moments you had shared, knowing that you had created memories that would last a lifetime.
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MASTERLIST
749 notes Ā· View notes
raekensluver Ā· 4 months ago
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a guarded romance (2)
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part 1
description: you are a famous billionaire's daughter and your father has hired you a new bodyguard. his name is spencer reid and he used to be a part of the fbi's behavior analysis unit.
pairing: bodyguard!spencer reid x famous!reader
contains: 18+, Minors DNI, talks of parental death, age gap (everyone is 18+), fingering, oral sex (m and f receiving), p in v, p in v from behind, sir kink, unprotected sex.
song rec: shameless by camillia cabello- "i need you more than i want to,"
w.c: 4.5k
an: i'm not sure on how i feel about this but i'm confident enough to post it! i appreciate all feedback! please comment on what you thought!!
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the drive home was quiet, the only sound the hum of the tires on the asphalt. spencer's eyes never left the road, his focus unwavering as he navigated the winding driveway leading to the mansion. the headlights swept across the lush, manicured lawns, casting eerie shadows on the grand faƧade.
once the car was parked in the cavernous underground garage, spencer was out before you could blink, his movements swift and precise. he opened your door with a courteous nod, his hand outstretched to help you step out. the cool air was a stark contrast to the stuffy gala, sending goosebumps racing across your skin.
his hand was firm yet gentle as he helped you out, his eyes scanning the garage before nodding towards the elevator. "after you, miss," he said, his voice a soothing balm to your frazzled nerves.
as the elevator whisked you up to the main floor, you leaned against the cool metal wall, feeling the weight of the evening pressing down on you. spencer remained silent, his eyes on the numbers as they climbed, his jaw set in a firm line.
you took a deep breath, the sudden need to express your gratitude overwhelming you. "reid," you began, your voice shaky. "i just wanted to thank you. for everything tonight."
his eyes met yours, the intensity in them making your heart flutter. "it's my job, miss," he said, but there was something more in his voice, a warmth that didn't usually accompany his professional demeanor.
you felt the elevator come to a gentle stop, the ding echoing in the quiet space. "it's more than that," you insisted, your voice barely above a whisper. "you didn't have toā€¦ lie for me like that."
spencer's gaze remained on the elevator doors, his expression thoughtful. "i didn't lie," he said, his voice even. "i told you i'd support you, and that's what i did."
you felt a lump form in your throat, his words resonating with something deep inside you. "but what about my father?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper. "he'll never believe that i'm engaged."
spencer's eyes flicked to yours, a hint of a smile playing on his lips. "leave that to me," he said, his voice filled with a surprising warmth. "i've dealt with more stubborn people than your dad."
you couldn't help but smile back, feeling a sudden camaraderie with this man who had been forced into your life. "thank you," you said, the words feeling sincere for the first time.
spencer's eyes searched yours, a silent understanding passing between you. "don't mention it," he said, his voice gentle. "now, let's get you inside and out of those uncomfortable shoes."
you stepped out of the elevator and onto the plush carpet of the mansion, the weight of the evening's events slowly lifting from your shoulders. spencer walked alongside you, his stride matching yours, his eyes still scanning the surroundings despite the late hour.
as you reached the grand staircase leading to your private wing, you paused, unable to shake the feeling that something had changed between you. you turned to face him, his gaze meeting yours. there was a moment of silence, the air thick with unspoken words and unexplored feelings.
"reid," you began, your voice tentative. "i know i've beenā€¦ difficult. but i do appreciate you being here."
his eyes searched yours, the corners crinkling slightly with the beginnings of a smile. "you're not difficult, miss carter," he said gently. "you're just trying to live your life on your terms."
his words hit you like a soft punch to the gut, the truth in them resonating deep within you. you nodded, feeling a sudden urge to confide in him. "it's justā€¦ hard, you know?" you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. "being the daughter of such a powerful man, everyone has expectations of me. i feel like i'm constantly being judged."
spencer's expression softened, his eyes searching yours with a gentle understanding. "i know," he said, his voice low. "but you don't have to carry that burden alone. i'm here for you, not just as your bodyguard, but as someone you can trust."
his words washed over you, filling you with a warmth that had been missing for so long. "iā€¦ i think i can do that," you said, your voice shaky. "trust you, i mean."
spencer's smile grew, the warmth in his eyes unmistakable. "i'll do my best not to disappoint," he said, his tone earnest. "now, let's get you to your room."
his hand rested on the small of your back as you made your way up the grand staircase, the chandelier above casting a warm glow across the marble steps. your heart raced, not from fear, but from the unfamiliar feeling of having someone truly on your side. the weight of the evening's events seemed to lessen with each step, his presence a comforting anchor in the sea of uncertainty.
once you reached your suite, spencer paused, his hand lingering for a moment before dropping away. "goodnight, miss carter," he said, his voice formal yet filled with genuine concern.
you felt a sudden pang of loneliness, the grandeur of the mansion feeling more like a prison than a home. "reid," you said, your voice barely above a whisper. "could youā€¦ stay for a bit?"
his eyes searched yours, the question hanging in the air between you. "are you sure?" he asked, his voice gentle. "i don't want to overstep."
you nodded, your grip on the banister tightening. "i'm sure," you said, the words surprising even you. "i justā€¦ i don't want to be alone right now."
spencer's expression softened, the unspoken tension between you dissipating slightly. "of course," he said, his voice gentle. "i'll stay as long as you need."
you walked into the massive walk-in closet, the rows of designer clothes and shoes a stark reminder of the life you'd been born into. the floor-to-ceiling mirror reflected spencer sitting on the armchair by the door, his eyes on the book he'd pulled from his pocket. you felt a strange comfort knowing he was there, his presence a silent reassurance.
the cool air kissed your bare back as you unzipped the dress, the fabric sliding down your body like a whispered goodbye. you stepped out of it, the red fabric pooling around your feet like a lake of regret. you pulled on a pair of comfortable pajamas, the soft fabric wrapping around you like a warm embrace.
sinking onto the edge of the bed, you turned to spencer, his eyes never leaving his book. "it's always been like this," you began, your voice barely above a murmur. "my father, i mean. ever since my motherā€¦ passed."
his eyes flicked up to meet yours, the understanding in them making your throat tighten. "i know," he said gently, setting the book aside. "it's not easy losing a parent."
you nodded, the lump in your throat making it difficult to speak. "my father's always beenā€¦ overprotective," you managed to say. "i've never had a boyfriend who lasted more than a couple of dates because he's always found some reason to not approve."
spencer leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees. "i understand," he said, his voice gentle. "it's his way of trying to keep you safe."
you scoffed, pulling your knees to your chest. "safe?" you repeated, the bitterness in your voice clear. "i feel like i'm in a cage."
spencer's eyes remained on yours, his expression filled with empathy. "i can imagine it's tough," he said, his voice gentle. "but he's just trying to protect you in the only way he knows how."
you sighed, leaning back against the plush pillows. "i know," you said, your voice weary. "but sometimes i just wish he'd let me live."
spencer's gaze never left yours, his eyes filled with understanding. "i'll talk to him," he said firmly. "i'll make sure he understands that you're an adult who deserves the freedom to make your own choices."
his words hit you like a gust of fresh air, filling you with a hope you hadn't felt in a long time. you felt the knot in your stomach loosen slightly. "you will?" you asked, your voice filled with a mix of disbelief and gratitude.
spencer nodded, his eyes never leaving yours. "i will," he said, his voice firm. "you're my responsibility, and i won't let anyone, not even your father, make you feel trapped." he finished, looking back down to his book.
his words were like a balm to your soul, and before you knew it, you had sat up and walked over to him, the fabric of your pajamas whispering against the soft carpet. you stopped in front of him, your heart racing in your chest. spencer looked up from his book, his eyes widening slightly as he took in your approach.
slowly, he stood up, his movements fluid and graceful despite his size. you felt the distance between you shrink, his presence suddenly overwhelming in the quiet of the night. "reid," you said, your voice shaky. "iā€¦ i don't know what to do."
his eyes searched yours, the intensity in them making your heart race. "you do what you want to do," he said, his voice low and steady. "make choices for yourself, not for your father or anyone else."
you took a deep breath, the weight of his words settling heavily on your shoulders. and then, without thinking, you leaned in and kissed him. spencer's eyes widened in surprise, his book slipping from his hand, but his arms came around you almost instinctively, pulling you closer. his lips were soft and gentle, a stark contrast to the firmness of his embrace.
the kiss grew deeper, more urgent, the unspoken connection between you two igniting into something more. you felt his heart racing beneath your palm, his breath hitching in his chest. it was as if all the tension and frustration of the evening had coalesced into this single moment, a silent promise of understanding and support.
spencer's arms tightened around you, his hands sliding down to your waist, pulling you closer. you could feel the heat of his body against yours, the fabric of his suit a stark contrast to the softness of your pajamas. your own heart was racing, the thrill of your sudden boldness mingling with the warmth of his embrace.
his mouth moved against yours, his tongue slipping between your lips, exploring the contours of your mouth with a gentle yet insistent touch. you moaned softly, your hands moving to his chest, feeling the rapid beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. the need to be closer, to feel more of him, overwhelmed you, and you reached down to unbuckle his belt.
his eyes searched yours for a moment, a silent question hanging in the air. when you nodded, he stepped back, allowing you to push his suit pants down. his cock sprang free, thick and hard, and you felt a thrill of desire shoot through you as you took it in your hand. it was a heady feeling, the power to make this strong, stoic man react so viscerally to your touch.
you dropped down, your eyes never leaving his as you took him into your mouth. spencer's hands tangled in your hair, his breath hitching as you began to move your head, your tongue swirling around the tip. the sound of his quiet gasps filled the room, his hips moving slightly in response to your rhythm.
his taste was new and thrilling, a heady mix of desire and need. you took him deeper, feeling him hit the back of your throat, his grip on your hair tightening. you could feel his muscles tensing, his breath coming in ragged pants as you worked him over.
his eyes never left yours, the intensity in them sending shivers down your spine. it was as if you could see every thought, every feeling, every need reflected in the depths of his gaze. you felt powerful, in control, and for the first time in a long time, alive.
his cock was hot and hard in your mouth, and the sound of his quiet moans spurred you on. your hand gripped the base of his shaft, stroking in time with the bob of your head. you felt him swell, his hips jerking slightly with each stroke of your tongue. it was an addictive feeling, knowing you could make this strong man tremble with just your touch.
spencer's pupils dilated with lust, his hands tangled in your hair, guiding you, but never pushing. you could see the struggle in his gaze, the desire to let go and just lose himself in the sensation warring with his ingrained need to maintain control. but tonight, in this quiet corner of the mansion, you were the one in charge.
you moaned around his cock, the vibration making him jerk. his grip on your hair tightened, his hips moving slightly to match the rhythm of your mouth. the salty taste of him was intoxicating, making your own desire pool between your legs. you could feel the wetness of your panties, a silent testament to how much his touch affected you.
spencer's breath was coming in harsh pants now, his eyes squeezed shut as he tried to hold back. but you weren't going to let him. you wanted him to lose control, to feel as alive as you did in this moment. you took him deeper, the tip of his cock hitting the back of your throat, the muscles in your neck straining.
but before he could reach his peak, you pulled away, your eyes meeting his with a fiery determination. "i want you to fuck me," you whispered, your voice hoarse with desire. the words hung in the air, a stark contrast to the gentle sounds of the mansion's nighttime ambiance.
spencer's eyes searched yours, the question in them clear. "are you sure?" he asked, his voice strained. you nodded, the need for his touch overwhelming any doubt that may have lingered.
you took his hand, leading him back to the bed, the plush comforter inviting and warm. your heart raced as you sat on the edge, watching him tuck his cock back into his pants, his hands trembling slightly. the sight of his arousal, so potent and undeniable, made your stomach flip.
spencer followed, his eyes never leaving yours as he approached. his gaze was filled with a mix of desire and hesitation, the weight of his duty to protect you clear in his expression. but as you took his face in your hands and pulled him down for a kiss, the doubt in his eyes faded away, replaced by a fierce need that matched your own.
his lips were soft and gentle, the kiss a silent promise of passion and comfort. your hands roamed his chest, feeling the firm muscles beneath his shirt, the rapid beat of his heart syncing with yours. the warmth of his body was like a brand against your skin, setting every nerve ending alight.
spencer broke the kiss, his eyes searching yours for permission. when you nodded eagerly, he began to kiss his way down your neck, his tongue tracing the delicate line of your collarbone. he reached the top of your pajama shirt, his fingers deftly unbuttoning it, the fabric parting to reveal the soft swells of your breasts.
his mouth moved lower, kissing each inch of exposed skin as he went. the sensation of his breath against your skin sent shivers down your spine, making you arch into his touch. his mouth reached your stomach, kissing the soft flesh with a tenderness that belied his firm grip. his hands found the hem of your shirt, pulling it up and over your head, leaving you in just your panties.
his eyes took in the sight of you, his breath catching in his throat. "you're beautiful," he murmured, the words a barely-there whisper. you felt your cheeks flush, the heat of his gaze warming you from the inside out. his hands trailed up your body, cupping your breasts, his thumbs brushing over your hardened nipples. you gasped, the sensation shooting straight to your core.
spencer's eyes searched yours, the question in them unspoken. when you nodded, he leaned down, his mouth capturing one of your nipples, suckling gently. you moaned, the pleasure of his touch sending waves of heat through you. your hands found his hair, tangling in the soft strands as you pulled him closer, urging him to give you more.
his mouth moved to the other breast, his tongue teasing the sensitive peak before moving lower. his hands slid down your body, his thumbs hooking into the waistband of your panties. you lifted your hips, helping him as he slid them down your legs, leaving you bare and exposed before him.
spencer's eyes took in every inch of you, his pupils dilated with desire. you felt a thrill of power at his reaction, the knowledge that he wanted you just as badly as you wanted him. you spread your legs wider, inviting him closer, the wetness between your thighs a silent plea.
his hand slid down your stomach, his thumb brushing over your clit, making you gasp. the touch was feather-light, a promise of what was to come. you watched as he took a deep breath, his control slipping away. "spencer," you whispered, your voice needy. "please."
his eyes met yours, the hunger in them unmistakable. without a word, he leaned in, his mouth replacing his thumb. the sensation was exquisite, his tongue circling your clit, sending bolts of pleasure through your body. your hands tightened in his hair, your hips rocking against his face.
his touch grew more insistent, his tongue moving faster, his fingers sliding into your wetness. you moaned, the pressure building, your body arching off the bed. the sound of your pleasure filled the room, the tension between you two unbearable.
spencer's eyes remained on yours, watching your every reaction, learning what made you gasp, what made you moan. his other hand found your hip, holding you in place as he feasted on you, his mouth and fingers working in tandem to push you closer to the edge.
the pressure grew, the tension in your body coiling tighter and tighter. your breath came in short, panting gasps, your eyes squeezed shut as the sensation built. and then, with a final flick of his tongue, you shattered. your orgasm ripped through you, your body convulsing as wave after wave of pleasure crashed over you.
spencer's eyes never left yours as you came, his gaze filled with a fierce possessiveness that sent shivers down your spine. as the last tremor of your climax subsided, he leaned back, his own need clear in the dark hunger of his eyes. without a word, he undid his tie and shrugged off his jacket, his shirt following suit.
his body was a sculpted masterpiece of muscle and strength, a stark contrast to the suave exterior he presented to the world. you felt your heart race as he stepped closer, his cock hard and ready. "are you sure about this?" he asked, his voice thick with lust.
you nodded, your desire for him overwhelming any remaining doubt. "yes," you whispered, your voice breathy with need. "i want you."
spencer's eyes searched yours for a moment longer before he reached down and untucked his cock from his pants. the fabric fell away, revealing his hard length once again. you couldn't help but stare, the memory of his taste still lingering on your lips. he stepped out of the fabric, leaving them in a pool at his feet.
his eyes never left yours as he climbed onto the bed, his body moving with a predatory grace. the mattress dipped slightly with his weight, and you felt your heart racing in anticipation. your legs spread wider, inviting him closer, the heat of his body radiating against your skin.
his hand reached out, his fingertips brushing against the wetness of your pussy, making you gasp. "so wet for me," he murmured, the awe in his voice sending a thrill through you. you nodded, unable to form coherent words as he positioned himself at your entrance.
his cock was hot and heavy, the tip nudging against you. you felt a moment of apprehension, but it was quickly replaced by a desperate need to feel him inside you. "please," you begged, your voice a whimper.
spencer's eyes searched yours, his own need reflected in the depths of his gaze. with a groan, he pushed forward, filling you inch by inch. you gasped as he stretched you, the feeling of fullness unlike anything you'd ever experienced. his pace was slow and deliberate, his body moving in perfect harmony with yours.
you wrapped your legs around his waist, pulling him closer, urging him deeper. spencer's eyes never left yours as he thrust into you, his movements powerful yet gentle. the friction was exquisite, the feel of his cock inside you sending shockwaves of pleasure through your body.
his hands held onto your hips, guiding you, as he began to move with a rhythm that had you moaning his name. your fingers dug into the sheets, your body moving in time with his. the room was filled with the sounds of your lovemaking, the heady scent of desire hanging in the air.
spencer leaned down, his breath hot against your ear as he whispered words of encouragement. "you're so beautiful," he murmured, his voice thick with passion. "so responsive."
you couldn't help but let out a soft moan, your body already anticipating his next move. with surprising strength, he flipped you over, his hands gripping your hips as he positioned himself behind you. your cheek pressed into the pillow, muffling your gasps as he entered you again, his cock sliding into your wetness from behind.
his hands found their way to your ass, squeezing and spreading your cheeks as he began to thrust. the angle was new, sending sensations through you that you'd never felt before. your eyes squeezed shut, your breath coming in ragged pants as he filled you completely. the feel of his body pressing into you, his hands holding you firmly in place, was both overwhelming and incredibly arousing.
his hips slapped against your ass with each movement, the sound echoing through the quiet room. your cheeks were flushed, your body trembling with the effort to hold still. but spencer was relentless, his movements growing more intense, his breath hot and ragged in your ear. "you like that?" he whispered, his voice a dark promise of more pleasure to come.
you nodded, unable to form words, your body already on the edge of another orgasm. "yes, sir," you managed to gasp out, the honorific slipping from your lips unbidden. something about the power dynamic, about being with a man who could both protect and pleasure you, sent a thrill through your veins.
spencer's grip tightened on your hips, his thrusts growing more urgent. "you're so good," he murmured, his voice low and gruff. "so fucking good." the way he said it, with such raw, unbridled passion, had you feeling like you were melting from the inside out.
his hand reached around, his thumb finding your clit, the touch making your eyes fly open. you arched your back, pushing back into him, the sensation too much to handle. "sir," you moaned, the word slipping from your lips like a prayer.
spencer's grip tightened, his strokes becoming more erratic as he neared his own climax. "you're going to come for me, aren't you?" he growled, his teeth grazing your ear. the pleasure was building, a pressure that threatened to consume you. "yes," you gasped, your voice barely above a whisper.
his thumb worked in time with his thrusts, the dual sensations pushing you closer and closer to the edge. you could feel his cock swelling inside you, his hips moving with a desperation that mirrored your own. "now," he whispered, his voice hoarse. "come for me now."
you did, your body convulsing around him as you came, the sensation so intense it was almost painful. spencer's own release followed, his cock pulsing as he filled you with his seed. the feeling of him coming inside you was like nothing you'd ever experienced, a claiming that went beyond the physical.
his body collapsed onto yours, his breath hot and heavy against your neck. your heart raced in your chest, the sound of your combined panting filling the room. for a moment, you just lay there, basking in the afterglow, the weight of him comforting rather than suffocating.
but reality soon intruded, the sound of a car pulling up outside jolting you both to attention. "your father," spencer murmured, his voice still thick with desire. "i should go."
you nodded, the spell of the moment broken. with a final, lingering kiss, he pulled away, his body sliding out of yours with a reluctance that mirrored your own. the cold air rushed in to fill the space he'd occupied, leaving you feeling empty and exposed. spencer quickly pulled his clothes back on, his movements efficient despite the tremble in his hands.
before he could turn away, you reached out, grabbing his wrist. "spencer," you said, your voice urgent. "before you goā€¦ promise me you'll talk to my father." you took a deep breath, the words tumbling out in a rush. "about how i need more freedom. about how i'm not a child anymore. about how i need to live my own life." the vulnerability in your voice was stark, a stark contrast to the powerful woman you'd been moments ago.
spencer's eyes searched yours, the understanding in them clear. he nodded, his grip on your wrist tightening slightly. "i promise," he said, his voice firm. "i'll talk to him. i'll make him understand."
you felt a weight lift from your chest, the hope of change fluttering in your stomach. "thank you," you whispered, the words filled with a sincerity that went beyond simple gratitude. you knew he would keep his word, that he would stand by you in this fight for your independence.
spencer leaned down, placing a soft kiss on your forehead, his eyes filled with a gentle concern. "you don't have to thank me," he said, his voice low and earnest. "i'm here to protect you, but that includes fighting for what you want, even if it's against your father's wishes."
his words resonated within you, filling you with a warmth that had nothing to do with the passion you'd just shared. you nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. "i know," you murmured. "that's why i trust you."
spencer's expression softened, his eyes holding yours for a long moment before he gently disentangled his hand from yours. "i won't let you down," he promised, the gravity of his words a silent pledge. with one last lingering look, he turned and slipped out of the room, his footsteps fading down the hallway.
edited 8.21.24
546 notes Ā· View notes
newobsessionweekly Ā· 6 months ago
Text
Puppy
Main masterlist | The Rookie masterlist
Tim Bradford x fem!reader Fandom: The Rookie
Summary: While you visit Tim at the station, you are too nice to a teenager he just arrested. To your boyfriend's exasperation, you pay the bail for the kid and cook him a warm dinner.
Warnings: don't think so, pure fluff, not proofread yet
Fluff Requested: Yes Words: 2.5k
GIF not mine, credits to the owner.
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"So," Lucy began tentatively, stealing a glance at the sergeant. "I saw you the other day. Looking at those rings."
"Chen." Tim warned his aide.
"Are you proposing to Y/N?" she pressed, her excitement bubbling over.
"That's not your business."
But Lucy wasn't about to let it go. "Look," she said eagerly, "If you need help picking the ring, I can help. I can ā€“ I don't know, have a little talk, find out what kind of ring she wants."
"I've got this, thanks," his voice was tinged with a hint of annoyance.
"We both know you don't." Lucy leaned back, "An engagement ring is not just any jewelry she can hide in a closet if she doesn't like it."
"I think I know what she wants."
"Remember her birthday present?" she reminded him, earning an accusing glance from Tim. "Just saying. Please, at least consider it, for Y/N."
Lucy opened her mouth to say more, but Tim's eyes caught something up ahead. His expression shifted to one of relief, a welcome distraction from Lucy's insistence.
"Hold that thought."
She followed his gaze and saw a young boy attempting to break into a parked car. The kid couldn't have been more than fifteen, his hands fumbling nervously with the lock. Tim pulled the shop to a stop and got out, Lucy following closely behind.
"Dispatch, this is Sergeant Bradford. We've got a possible 459 in progress at the corner of 4th and Main."
"Hey! Step away from the car!" Tim called out, his voice authoritative.
The boy froze, his eyes wide with fear. He turned to run, but Lucy was already moving, cutting off his escape route. "It's okay," she said gently, her demeanor softening. "We're not here to hurt you."
Tim approached, his expression softening just a bit."What do you think you're doing?"
The boy stammered, "Iā€”I wasn't going to steal it, I swear. I just... I need some money. My mom's sick, and we can't afford the meds."
The boy looked down at his feet and Lucy sighed, recognising the familiar signs of desperation. "Look, we can help you. But breaking into cars isn't the way to go."
"You need to come with us and tell us everything. We'll figure something out."
The shop was quiet except for the hum of the engine and the sound of Lucy's fingers tapping on her phone. Tim glanced over at her, his focus shifting between the road and his aide's ever-present curiosity.
"TouristPlanet says that Hawaii is number one for proposals," Lucy broke the silence, her eyes never leaving the phone.
"Chen, I don't need help. I've done it before, I know how it works," Tim replied, exasperated but with a hint of amusement.
Lucy ignored his brush-off. "Oh, but I love Y/N! I just want everything to be perfect for her. I mean, it's huge."
Tim sighed, his grip on the steering wheel tightening. "And you don't think I love her enough to make this special?"
"I didn't say that," Lucy replied quickly. "You've done it before, it's not a big deal for you. But it's her first proposal and she loves you."
"It is a big deal," Tim admitted, his voice softer now. "I think I love her even more than I loved Isabel back then. So it's more complicated now."
Lucyā€™s eyes widened in surprise, a soft smile spreading across her face. "You have a heart after all."
"Chen. Shut up." he shot her a warning sideways glance, a hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.
"Yes, sir."
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As you step into the bustling station, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and sugary donuts fills the air, mingling with the sound of urgent radio chatter and shuffling footsteps. You clutch the cardboard tray tighter, a smile playing on your lips as you navigate through the familiar chaos, scanning the faces for Tim's unmistakable handsomeness.
Not finding him among the desks, you make your way to Grey's office, offering a cheery wave before stepping inside.
"Morning, Sarge."
Grey glances up from his paperwork, a faint smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. "Y/N. Always a pleasure to have you around," he responds welcoming.
With a graceful motion, you offer him a cup of steaming coffee and gesture towards the assortment of donuts nestled in the box. The sergeant chuckles softly, accepting the offering with a nod of appreciation.
"Please do come more often," he jests, his eyes twinkling with amusement.
"I'll keep that in mind," you reply playfully but your attention is elsewhere, your gaze still searching the room for that familiar figure. "You know where I can find Tim?"
With a knowing nod, Grey gestures for you to follow him as he leads the way towards the processing room. As you step inside, the atmosphere shifts from bustling activity to a more subdued intensity.
"Bradford. You have a visitor," Grey announces, his voice carrying a hint of amusement.
Tim looks up from his paperwork, his gaze meeting yours, and a soft smile tugs at the corners of his lips. His gaze lifts, his expression softening at the sight of you standing there, a welcome interruption to the monotony of his day.
"Hey," he greets you, a flicker of surprise in his voice. "What are you doing here?"
You set the tray of treats down on a nearby table and close the distance between you, wrapping your arms around him in a tight embrace. "Hey handsome," you reply, your voice muffled against his chest. "You left early and I thought you could use some coffee."
Timā€™s strong arms pulled you closer, the familiar scent of his cologne mingles with the coffee and donuts, grounding you in the moment. You feel his strong, warm body melting in your arms and the steady beat of his heart, a gentle reminders of how much you love him.
Pulling back slightly, you look up into his eyes, which are now filled with a gentle warmth that belies his grumpiness.Timā€™s hand finds yours, giving it a gentle squeeze before he releases you.
"Youā€™re a lifesaver."
Lucy wander into the room, her eyes lighting up at the sight of the treats. "Y/N, you spoil us," she teases, reaching for a donut.
Your eyes drift across the room, settling on a teenage boy obediently following an officer's commands, his shoulders slumped and eyes downcast. Concern wells up inside you.
"Tim," you ask softly, nodding towards the boy, "what's with the kid? What's he doing here?"
He glances over at the kid, his expression hardening. "Kid tried to break into a car. Said he needed the money to pay for his mom's meds."
Your heart aches at the sight of the innocent boy, his face etched with fear and worry. "What's going to happen to him?" you ask, your voice soft with concern.
Tim sighs, rubbing the back of his neck. "He'll probably get away with bail. First offense, and the circumstances are... mitigating."
Moved by the boyā€™s plight, you make a decision. ā€œTim, can I have your card?ā€ you ask, reaching out your hand.
Your boyfriend eyes you warily, his brow furrowing. "Why?"
"Just trust me."
He frowns but doesn't question your request further. He fishes a card from his pocket and hands it to you. As you reach for the box of donuts, his frown deepens.
"Y/N, what are you doing?" he asks, his voice rising with annoyance.
You stop to meet his gaze, "Trust me, please."
Tim watches you walk over to the boy and kneel down, his jaw tightening. "This is ridiculous," he mutters under his breath, his grumpiness evident as he crosses his arms over his chest.
"Can I have a minute with him?" you ask Lucy, who is in the midst of processing the boy.
Lucy looks over at Tim, seeking his approval. His eyes narrow, but he gives a curt nod, though his frustration is palpable. Lucy steps aside, joining your boyfriend as they watch you with a mix of curiosity and concern.
"Hi, there." you say softly, your voice kind and shooting, "I'm Y/N. What's your name?"
"Charlie."
"Well, Charlie, Sergeant Bradford told me you're in some kind of trouble." you say gently, your heart breaking at his situation.
The boy looks up at you, tears welling in his eyes. "I didn't mean to do anything wrong. Iā€“ I just want to help mom."
"I know, sweetheart. You hungry?" you ask, offering him a comforting smile.
Charlie nods, and you hand him the box full of donuts. His eyes widen in surprise and gratitude as he takes it.
You write your name and number on Tim's card and hand it to him. "It's gonna be okay for now. But if you have any other problems, please give us a call. If you don't want to talk to Bradford, you can call me, okay?"
"Thanks. Iā€“ I will," Charlie says, clutching the card like a lifeline.
"Where's your mom?" you ask, wanting to understand more about his situation.
"In hospital. Sheā€“ uh, she has cancer and treatment is expensive."
"You stay with her at the hospital?" you ask gently, your mind already made up to help him.
Charlie nods, tears brimming in his eyes. Determined to do more, you know you'll pay his bail and offer any support you can.
Tim strides over, his expression a mix of annoyance and concern. His grumpiness, which had momentarily melted away, returns in full force. "Alright, that's enough," he says, his voice firm and edged with frustration. "We need to get things moving."
You stand up, giving Charlie one last reassuring smile. "Remember, call me if you need anything," you say before turning to Tim.
He looks at you, his irritation clear. "Y/N, you can't save everyone," he mutters, shaking his head. "This isn't your job."
You meet his gaze, "I know. But I can try to help one," you reply softly.
"You really shouldn't get involved like that," he says, his voice softer now, filled with concern.
"I know."
He sighs, reaching to take your hand into his. "But I love that about you. Just...promise me you'll be careful. For my sake."
You squeeze his hand, smiling warmly. "I promise."
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The end of the shift greets Tim and Lucy walking towards their cars, the sky darkening with the onset of evening. The station is quieter now, the earlier hustle and bustle giving way to the calm of a winding-down day. He's itching to get home, to feel the warmth and comfort of your presence, to escape the relentless grind of the day.
"Hey, Tim," Lucy starts, glancing at him curiously. "Did you pay the bail for that Charlie boy we arrested this morning?"
Tim raises an eyebrow, surprised. "No, why?"
"Because someone did," Lucy explains, frowning. "I checked, and he doesnā€™t have any other family besides his mom. I can't figure out who would have done it."
His eyes narrow, and then it hits him. "I think I know who."
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The drive home is a blur as he processes the day's events. When he finally steps through the front door, heā€™s greeted by the comforting aroma of dinner cooking and the sound of upbeat song playing in the background.
"Sweetheart, I'm home," he calls out, his voice echoing through the house.
You turn around, a bright smile on your face. "Hey, babe. Come, come. Dinner's almost ready."
Tim steps into the kitchen, and his eyes widen in pure shock as he spots Charlie sitting at the island, a plate of snacks in front of him.
"Y/N, a word," Tim says, his voice tight.
"Make yourself at home, Charlie. We'll be right back."
You give the kid a big smile while Tim forces a very strained one, then you follow him to the bedroom. He closes the door behind you with more force than necessary, his frustration evident.
"What the hell is he doing here?" Tim demands, his voice rising in anger.
"I know, I'm sorry. I should've talked to you. But I couldn't let him stay in jail. He's been sleeping in a hospital chair, Babe. God knows when it was the last time he had a proper, warm meal. There's no one to look after him."
Tim runs a hand through his hair, his anger barely contained. "I can't believe you did that. Youā€™ve got ourselves a puppy," he mutters, his tone sharp.
"What?" you ask, confused.
"Nothing."
You place a gentle hand on his arm, your eyes pleading. "Tim, listen to me. This kid needs help. He's scared and alone. I couldn't just walk away."
You step even closer, wrapping your arms around his waist, feeling the tension in his muscles.
"You can't just bring home a stray. This is serious, Y/N. We're not a shelter."
"Charlie is not a stray, he needs help. His mom is in the hospital with cancer, and he's been trying to fend for himself," you explain, "We have the means to help him, at least for one night."
"This isn't just about money or means, Y/N. It's about safety and boundaries. We can't take in every kid with a sob story."
"I get that, but this isn't just any kid. You saw him today, baby. He's not a criminal; he's just a boy trying to help his mom," you argue, stepping closer to him. "We can't turn our backs on him."
Tim's frustration is simmering beneath the surface. "Damn it, Y/N. This is exactly why I worry about you. You have a big heart, and I don't want to see you get hurt."
You rested your head on his chest. "I know. But I can't just turn my back when someone needs help. I get involved because I care," you say softly, meeting his eyes, "And you care too, whether you want to admit it or not."
"I can't say no to you, can I?" he mutters, his voice a mix of exasperation and affection.
You smile up at him, standing on your tiptoes to kiss his cheek.
Tim looks at you, his grumpiness warring with his love for you. "I can't believe I'm agreeing to this," he sighs again, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you even closer, "Just one night," he says, "And then we figure out what to do next."
You nod, relief flooding through you. "I promise. Just one night."
Pressing a kiss to your forehead, his grumpiness is melting away, "You're impossible, you know that?" a hint of a smile playing on his lips.
"I know," you reply, smiling back at him. "But you love me anyway."
He chuckles softly, shaking his head. "Yeah, I do," he admits, his voice tender. "Now let's go see how our guest is doing."
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dumbslvtforethan Ā· 4 months ago
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āˆæ DEVOTED TO YOU ethan landry
ā€” summary: ethan helps you relieve some tension
warnings smut, fingering, pet names, dom!ethan, sub!reader, innocent reader, implications of murder, lmk if i missed anything 1,215 words
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š™š mdni!! ā†“ā†“ š™šą¼˜ā‹†ą³€ą³€
YOUā€™VE BEEN GRUMPY ALL DAY unsure of the reason but pondering the rush that filled your blood whenever you kissed your boyfriend, ethan, puzzled by this new different sort of heat that you've been feeling lately, your panties have been a little wetter than normal when you'd come home, you thought it was some kind of illness.
ethan on the other hand was far from innocent, he knew exactly what you were feeling. he liked having you as his little pet, after all, he looked huge beside you, making his desire of being inside you way more intense. you had very serious attachment issues, having to be close to him at all times to be fully fulfilled and happy. although he tried to use that as an advantage, you were not very fond to touch him sexually, whenever he'd take a step further in you would just push his hand away or make up an excuse, maybe it had to do with what you've been through, which, you never told ethan. it also didn't help that he looked giant beside you, he could easily crush you whole with his hand if he really wanted to.
although you were both happy with the relationship, ethan wanted to take a step further, he wanted to feel you, your body, but he never did, afraid it would crush your fragile melancholy. what you didn't know at the time was that his big hands would help cure your little "illness".
"alright, lets go home" he said taking you by the waist after you've given a bit of an attitude to mindy that was not very usual of you. "why" you whined in his arms not pulling him away just questioning his movements "baby come on" you gave in, following him to the door of mindy's apartment. the walk home was rather unusual. when a girl gave you a disgusted glance at you snapped "you look like a whore in that outfit" you yelled, the girl looked even more disgusted and a bit confused "yeah and your boobs look awfu- " your phrase got cut short when your boyfriend picked you up and put you over his shoulders, a thing that happened more often than you would think. "what is up with your attitude recently?" he questioned his sweet and fragile girlfriend that had recently developed a strange habit of taking back.
you were now sitting on ethan's lap reflecting about what just happened. he would never admit it but your usual straddle of his lap would always leave him rock hard, at first he would just try to hide it but after seeing that you were rather naive he never really hid it anymore. "are you going to tell me what's wrong?" he questioned after a long minute of silence "its just embarrassing" "why would it be embarrassing baby you can tell me everything" you sighed "its just, i've been feeling hot lately, specially when i see you or when you kiss me and when i get home and go to the bathroom im all wet down there" you started to sob in ethan's shoulder convinced that you were sick. ethan on the other hand had a huge smirk on his face, who would've thought that his ego would go up so fast in less than 5 minutes?
"where does it hurt baby?" "here?" he asked putting a hand on your stomach "lower" he lowered his hand playing with the waistband of your shorts "can i take this off?" you nod. that action reveals the sight of your glistening pussy, something he had never seen before but certainly fantasized about it. you unexpectedly take his hand and place it right on top of your clit, you throw your head back and moan at the slight touch. it was at that moment that ethan realized you had never been touched that that was probably the reason why you've always rejected him, rejected his touch. "lets go to my room" he said taking your hand and leading you to your room. he closed the door "do you wanna learn how to relieve this feeling baby? i can teach you" your legs trembled as you eagerly nodded you both sat in front of your mirror you infront of him. "open your legs baby" he whispered in your ear sending you shivers "theres a lot of ways to feel good, you can do it like this" he rubbed your clit fastly. you throwed your head back once again, "you can do this too" he put two fingers in, pumping them up and down "ugh" you moaned already cumming on his fingers releasing a week worth of a horny feeling. "do you want to learn more?" you nod eagerly.
and there you were watching him layed down on the bed with his glistening cock sprung out. "it wont fit ethan" you said concernedly examining his length "come on you havent even tried, you'll feel much better baby" he gestured you to come, you crawled on top of him and aligned his dick with your wet entrance. "just sit on it" and so you did. "e-etha-nn" you moaned the most pornographic sound you've ever heard "its too big, i cant do it" you only had his tip in, but you already felt so full "thats just the tip baby you're not even halfway" you sighed sinking down completely ā€œthere you goā€ he smiled ā€œmy pretty girl took all my cock huh?ā€ you nodded. it was a burning pain at first, after all, practically half of your body was full of his dick. you layed down on his chest hugging him of exhaustion ā€œyou gotta move babyā€ he whispered in your ear.
you started to bounce up and down his dick, loud moans escaping from your mouth each time you made a movement, even the slightest one. you came on his dick in less than 5 minutes and ethan was loving it. he was loving the sight of you cockdrunk milking his dick, gushing out your pussy juices uncontrollably. he quickly switched positions, him being on top of you, he started to move his hips fastly ā€œethan!ā€ you moaned loudly cumming for the second time of the night, only this time you didnā€™t stop, still gushing out cum. ā€œim gonna cum babyā€ he said pulling out and releasing himself on your tits. he layed down beside you breathing heavily and hugged you ā€œso how was it?ā€ he was out of breath ā€œamazing, can we do it again soon?ā€ ā€œof courseā€ he got up and dressed ā€œi love you okay but i gotta go, ill see you tomorrowā€ he gave you a kiss on the cheek and left
and now you were alone and missing your boyfriend, so you called him ā€œbabe?ā€ you said ā€œwhats up baby?ā€ he was breathing heavily ā€œi miss youā€ your eyes started tearing up ā€œremember that teddy bear i gave you? hold on to it, i just gotta do some important stuff here but once im finished iā€™ll come see you, i love you, see you soonā€ and with that he finished the call, sure you heard some screaming in the back and he was breathing heavily but ethan couldnā€™t even hurt a fly, he could never be a killer, right?
- @dumbslvtforethan on tumblr
a/n: heres the request for this one
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libraryofgage Ā· 1 year ago
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Good Vibrations Two
This AU got a lot more attention than I expected actually hfjdks I'm so glad everyone likes it!
Anyway, here's part two! We get some concert, some peeks at how Robin helps Steve navigate social situations, and a little Eddie having an itsy-bitsy crisis over Steve's fashion choices.
Have fun! And, as always, if you see any typos, no you didn't (especially for this one since I wrote most of it on my phone actually lmao)
----
Steve stares at the shirts laid out on his bed, arms crossed over his chest. Choosing jeans had been easy, but choosing a shirt is giving him trouble. What do you wear to a metal show at the local dive bar for a small-town band in which the lead singer is a long-time and way-out-of-your-league crush that you've been holding a candle for since the first time you saw him laugh on top of a cafeteria table?
You definitely don't show up in a plain black shirt, that's for sure.
The lights in the hall outside Steve's room flicker, switching off and on three times. Steve just barely notices, which means he doesn't get his pants scared off when Robin appears in the doorway, grinning at him while pocketing the key to the front door he'd given her months ago into a messenger bag. "Hey, dingus," she says, striding into the room and flopping onto the bed.
Steve rolls his eyes, yanking the shirts out from under her and laying them once more over Robin's stomach and legs. "What shirt should I wear?" he asks.
It takes a few seconds for Steve to look from the shirts to Robin, and she patiently waits until he's staring at her to say, "Just pick one. Nobody's gonna care what you're wearing."
"I care," Steve says, frowning as he looks back at the shirts. For the aforementioned crush reason, Steve cares very much about the shirt he wears. "What says 'Hi, we've never talked before but your music is the only thing I can hear and I think your hair is in desperate need of quality shampoo and also I've been halfway in love with you since, like, sophomore year'?"
Robin considers the question for a long moment before picking up a red sweater. "This one says 'I'm horny'," she offers.
Steve blinks, staring at the sweater for a few beats before laughing. "But I'm not," he says.
Despite looking at Robin, she happens to angle her head toward the sweater, and her response is lost on Steve. He frowns, waits until her jaw has stopped moving, and says, "I didn't get that."
After Robin first learned about Steve's deafness, he'd been overly anxious about asking her to repeat things. Somehow, it was worse to constantly ask when the person knew he couldn't hear well, if at all. But Robin had never shown annoyance; she'd just adjust her posture, make sure Steve could see her lips, and repeat her words. She does all of this now, and Steve gets to read her joking response, "Yeah, but you will be."
And, yeah, she has him there. Steve huffs and collapses onto the bed beside her, sacrificing the shirts. "I'll need a jacket," he says, turning his head to look at Robin so he can read her response.
Instead of words, though, he sees her face light up, and she jumps off the bed. Steve sits up, watching as she digs in her messenger bag before pulling out a t-shirt. "Remember when I stayed over a few weeks ago? And you let me borrow a shirt? You should wear it!"
Thankfully, Robin waits until she's done talking to throw the shirt in Steve's face. Honestly, he only understood a few words ("remember," "borrow," and "wear") but he's gathered enough context clues to get the gist of things.
He spreads the shirt out, humming at the Iron Maiden design. It's not one he wears often; for the most part, it's a shirt he wears on lazy days at home because of how soft it is. But as he's studying the design, Steve is suddenly hit with a stroke of pure genius.
He quickly changes into the shirt and then grabs a varsity jacket (not his letterman, but one he'd seen at the mall and bought on a whim because it used a nice shade of yellow) off his desk, tugging it on over the shirt but leaving it unbuttoned. After a few more seconds of digging around, he finds sneakers under the bed and tugs them on.
"Okay," he says, turning so Robin can see the outfit from every angle. He comes to a stop when he's facing her once more, hands buried in his jacket pockets, and asks, "What do you think? How's it look?"
"I think you'll give Eddie a crisis," Robin replies, wrinkling her nose at the varsity jacket. "Not, like, a bad one. But he'll probably ask where you got the shirt from."
Steve grins, thinking that sounds about perfect, and turns to study himself in the mirror. It's a surprisingly solid blend of metal and jock, and it makes him feel oddly confident, the same way he felt the first time he did his hair just right and everyone complimented it.
"Perfect," he decides. "Let's go."
----
The ride to the Hideout isn't exactly quiet, but it's not like Steve can talk and drive at the same time. So it's filled with music blasted as high as it can go on his car stereo, causing the whole vehicle to vibrate with each beat. When he finally turns the car off after parking, Robin grimaces as she rubs her ears.
She waits for Steve to be in front of her before saying, "We're putting the windows down next time."
"Oh. Sorry," Steve says, rubbing the back of his neck a little awkwardly as Robin dismissively waves off his apology.
"No, it's fine, I'm just saying. Now, let's get inside before they start."
With that, she loops her arm through Steve's and drags him into the Hideout. They're hit with a wave of cigarette smoke, spilled beer, and sweat as they walk through the door, the combined smells making Steve dizzy. He frowns, leaning closer to Robin as she squeezes his arm. He feels her thumb tap him twice, their code for asking if the other is okay.
"I'm fine," he mumbles, nodding to a table in the corner. "Let's go sit. I just need to get used to...everything."
The lights are weird, too. Despite the place being dim, the few lights that are on are flickering, and Steve is having trouble processing all the new information his (working) senses are taking in.
Thankfully, Robin pulls him over to the table he pointed to, a small circle near a stage of dubious sturdiness. It looks like it can barely hold the instruments, much less those plus the people who will play them. There's an amp on the side of the stage near the table, which means they'll have the perfect spot to feel the music's vibrations. Steve slides into one of the chairs there and closes his eyes, resting his arms on a table that is surprisingly not sticky.
He feels Robin move the other chair next to him, slide in, and start pulling things out of her bag. When Steve opens his eyes again, there's a notebook between them and a variety of pens in all different colors spread out across the open pages. Robin has already picked up a red pen and is writing with it as Steve chooses a purple one.
When Robin is done writing, she taps the page so Steve can read, "Want something to drink?"
"I'm not sure we can trust the glasses here," he writes back.
"The fact you're calling them "glasses" tells me everything. Just sit tight."
With that, Robin drops her pen, winks at Steve, and heads over to the bar where a woman is wiping the counter. Steve watches her for a few seconds before looking around at the other people in the place. Most of them are sitting in groups, talking amongst themselves. Most of them also have mustaches or beards, making it downright impossible for Steve to read their lips.
Instead, Steve just gets a dull kind of rush in his ears, an ever-present background noise he can't escape. Soon enough, maybe because he's thinking about it too much, a high-pitched ringing starts up in his right ear, growing and growing in pitch until it's all he can focus on. Steve grimaces and looks down at the notebook, trying to keep his shoulders relaxed so he doesn't look as tense as he feels. The ringing persists, and he rubs his ear like that's going to help.
His ear is still ringing, though it has started to diminish, when a water bottle is placed in front of him. Steve jerks, forcing himself to calm down as Robin slides into her seat again with a mug of beer that's more foam than anything else. "They're about to start," she says, waiting until Steve has nodded once to show understanding before taking a sip.
Steve looks up at the stage and wonders how he missed Eddie and his friends arriving. As his friends are setting up behind him, Eddie is resting one hand on the neck of his guitar and using the other to hold the mic close to his mouth. Steve can't read his lips, but Eddie's grin is a little contagious as he says something to a guy by the bar. The guy must say something back, because Eddie bursts out laughing, his head thrown back to show off a neck Steve wants to bite.
A tap on his arm brings his attention away, and he looks at the notebook to see Robin has scrawled out a transcript:
"Eddie: Thanks for coming out tonight, everyone
Guy: Fuck off, Munson
Eddie: Love you, too, Jeremy"
Steve snorts, looking up to see Robin's equally amused smile as she continues to write on another page. When he glances at the stage, Steve sees Eddie still talking into the mic, his eyes roaming over the audience until they reach Steve and Robin. Eddie seems to grip the mic tighter, and he holds Steve's eyes for a few seconds, giving just enough time for Steve to wave awkwardly before Eddie looks away. But his smile seems a little bigger than before, and Steve is happy to let himself think he caused it.
When he looks down again, Robin has finished writing, and she nudges the notebook closer to him. Eddie must talk fast, because her writing is almost indistinguishable from chicken scratch in dirt that a cat got dragged through. Thankfully, Steve is an expert at this point.
"Eddie: Anyway, you know the drill. We'll start with some Metallica, treat you to Iron Maiden, throw in a dash of Black Sabbath, and then grace you with a Corroded Coffin original. If you don't like it, not my problem."
Steve feels the beginning of the set as he finishes reading. He sits a little straighter, planting his feet firmly on the floor and placing his palms on the table with his fingers spread. Robin is still writing next to him, most likely transcribing the bits and pieces of conversation she can hear for Steve to read later and laugh at. She doesn't try to get his attention while she does, already knowing it won't be worth it after Steve has shifted into Music Mode.
In the same way that people can tell what song is playing based simply on the first note, Steve can sometimes tell based on the strength and length of the first vibration. In the same way people know the lyrics of songs after listening to them enough times, Steve knows the vibration patterns like the back of his hand. In the same way people who hear their favorite songs played live can tell when a note is wrong or a lyric is sung too fast, Steve can tell when the drummer or bassist makes tiny mistakes that wouldn't be caught otherwise.
And Steve loves it. He loves how his entire body thrums with each vibration that travels from the amp. He loves how he can close his eyes and picture a story based on the music, one that probably doesn't match the lyrics but tends to replace them in his heart. He loves that this is something he can still share with his friends, even if most of them don't realize how different his experience with music is.
So, for all the little bumps and dips that occur in the vibrations as Corroded Coffin plays, for all the tiny slips that certainly go unnoticed by anyone else, and for all the fact that Steve doesn't get to hear Eddie's voice, he can confidently say he loves the show. He's never heard the songs played like this before, and it helps diminish the gut-deep desperation for new music.
And then Corroded Coffin starts a new song. It's one Steve doesn't recognize, one with vibrations that are completely foreign to him, and he jerks his head up to watch Eddie play his guitar in an opening solo. It thrums across the floor, climbing up his legs and spreading in waves from his palms on the table. Steve feels goosebumps chase after it, a new wave washing over him when the guitar solo ends with a particularly strong vibration that's immediately followed by the drums and bass.
Eddie throws himself into the music, moving and twisting and strutting around the stage like he's playing to Madison Square Garden. Steve can't look away, the lyrics incomprehensible but replaced by the jerk of Eddie's hips and the tilt of his head and the little half-spin he does on his heel.
It ends too quickly with one final, reverberating strum that lingers in Steve's bones, burrowing into his marrows as Eddie pushes his hair back and grins into the mic. He says something breathlessly, his shoulders rising and falling rapidly as he tries to catch his breath, and Steve knows he's gone.
He's hopeless.
He's desperate.
He needs more Corroded Coffin, more Eddie, in whatever form he can get.
----
For the first time, Corroded Coffin gets genuine applause after playing. Usually, the patrons of the Hideout will politely clap (if they even notice the set is over) for about two seconds. Tonight, however, Eddie and his friends are graced with excited clapping, a few shouts, and one very strong whistle from a small table to the left of the stage. And it spreads because even rough biker dudes can fall to peer pressure when it's that enthusiastic.
So, yeah, genuine applause all because of Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley who, Eddie thinks, is surprising company for the former King of Hawkins High. No matter how unexpected, he should still thank them and ask what they thought of the set now that it's over. He carefully sets his guitar on a stand and glances over his shoulder, catching Jeff's gaze and flashing a grin. "I'll be right back," he says before jumping off the stage and heading over to Steve and Robin's table.
As he gets closer, he notices the notebook and pens spread out, colorful writing filling the pages and Steve grinning with amusement as he reads it. Robin is watching him like she's waiting for him to understand an inside joke already so they can laugh about it together. If Eddie didn't already know Robin was like him (band camp, summer after his junior year, during an unfortunate game of Seven Minutes in Heaven where they awkwardly stood in a closet together before Robin commented on his black bandana), he'd wonder if something was going on between them.
"How'd you like the set?" Eddie asks when he reaches the table, suddenly nervous enough to tug on a lock of his hair and pull it in front of his mouth.
Robin looks up, but Steve doesn't. He's still reading the notebook, snorting at whatever is written there like he didn't hear Eddie. It's not until Robin elbows him that he raises his head, eyes widening when he sees Eddie. "Sorry, could you repeat that?" Steve asks, his gaze dropping to Eddie's mouth (Eddie definitely isn't imagining that) and faltering some.
"I asked if you liked the set," Eddie says, frowning slightly as Robin grabs a pen and scribbles something on the notebook. It's too small for him to read, but he doesn't miss how Steve glances down for less than a second before his eyes light up with realization.
"Oh!" he says, looking back at Eddie and flashing a charming grin. "It was great. You guys are so loud, and I've never f-uh, heard anything like your original song before."
Eddie catches the way Steve fumbles, faltering like he wanted to say one word but forced himself to say another. Something is tugging at the back of Eddie's mind, but he can't quite grab onto it just yet. For now, he leans forward, placing both hands on the table so he can be closer to Steve. "You listen to metal often, Harrington?" he asks.
Steve stares at his mouth for a few seconds before nodding, and Eddie feels the thrill of learning something completely unexpected. "I like Black Sabbath best, but Judas Priest and Guns N' Roses are close seconds," Steve says.
"Yeah?" Eddie asks, "What do you like most about it?" He wants to know. Does Steve Harrington (King Steve, Steve "The Hair" Harrington, Steve fucking Harrington) like metal for the same reasons he does? Does he like the stories and the passion and the heavy theatricality of it all?
Steve seems to hesitate, possibly thinking about how to answer, before finally saying, "I like how it's music I can feel. When I listen to metal, it digs into my bones. Other music doesn't."
Somehow, Eddie's grin gets impossibly wider, and his cheeks are hurting from the sheer force of it. He's about to say more when Robin glances at the clock and swears under her breath. "Shit, I promised Mom I'd be home ten minutes ago," she says, grabbing the pens and recklessly throwing them into her bag.
It's the movement that seems to catch Steve's attention, and he looks down at Robin's hands before looking up at the clock. "Oh, fuck, your curfew," he says, looking at Robin like she hadn't just said the same thing two seconds ago.
"Yeah, no shit, dingus," Robin says, pausing long enough to speak while looking straight at Steve before throwing the notebook into her bag, too. She jumps to her feet and hauls Steve out of the chair, making his varsity jacket fall open to reveal an Iron Maiden shirt.
And Eddie thinks his heart just about stops. He doesn't know why, but seeing Steve in a metal band shirt under an undeniably jock jacket makes him feel....something. This is, like, sacrilege, right? How dare Steve Harrington allow Metal and Jock to meet? Doesn't he know the two styles clash? Or, well, they're supposed to clash, but Steve somehow wears them well, and Eddie thinks he's upset and annoyed by the fact.
Before Eddie can analyze that feeling, Steve says, "Sorry to run, Eddie. You played really well. Let me know when the next show is."
There's a lot to unpack there, too. Steve Harrington wants to come to another Corroded Coffin gig. Steve Harrington is sorry he has to cut the conversation short. Steve Harrington thinks his band played really well. Before Eddie can say anything in response, Robin is dragging Steve away, throwing a goodbye over her shoulder.
Eddie doesn't want Steve to go without something, though, some kind of departing word, so he shouts, "See ya later, big boy!"
Steve doesn't look back, but Robin nearly trips over the doorway. She then pauses long enough to say something to Steve, watching with sheer delight as he splutters and glances at Eddie before dragging her through the door. Eddie couldn't stop the grin if he tried, and he didn't try.
Later, when Eddie is sprawled on the floor of his room, staring up at the ceiling and thinking about Steve's stupid combination of Metal and Jock, he'll be struck by a sudden, consuming thought. What if Steve was wearing just the Iron Maiden shirt? What if he wore just the jacket?
Eddie swallows around the sudden lump in his throat, his mouth going dry as he scrambles to his feet and gets ready to take a very, very cold shower.
----
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kiwriteswords Ā· 27 days ago
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If put to the test, would you step back from the line of fire?
AN:Ā This got out of hand!! But kinda became one of my favorite stories I have written! I was up WAY too late today and in between meetings at work finished it, so I hope you enjoy it!! Let me know what you think!
Other WritingĀ |Ā Ao3
Pairing:Ā Aaron Hotchner x Female!Reader
Word Count:Ā 19k
Rating:Ā Mature
Tags/TW:Ā  canon-typical themes, angst, fluff,Ā injuries, fade-to-black smut, sexual tension, banters, enemies-to-lovers, suggestive comments.
Summary: New to the BAU, you quickly find yourself at odds with the unit's stoic leader, Aaron Hotchner. What starts as a clash of wills and a battle of stubbornness soon transforms into a connection neither of you anticipated. With each case you work, your fire-fueled banter and undeniable tension grow, challenging your carefully constructed walls. As you both navigate the line between professional rivals and something more, you're forced to confront the truth youā€™ve been hidingā€”from each other and yourselves. In a world where control is your armor, letting someone in could be the biggest risk you've ever taken.
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The bullpen buzzed with the usual energy as you made your way to your desk, the new addition to the BAU. You knew the reputation Aaron Hotchner held in the unit: stoic, precise, and tough on new recruitsā€”especially women. Youā€™d heard the stories from the team about how he handled Emily's arrival and Jordanā€™s brief stint. You were determined not to let him rattle you.
But what you didn't expect was how quickly the two of you would clash.
"Agent Y/L/N," Hotch called out from his office, barely looking up from his paperwork. "I need that report on the recent case by the end of the hour. I hope you understand the urgency of deadlines here."
"I've been doing this job for a while, Hotchner," you replied with a clipped tone. "I donā€™t need a reminder on how to meet deadlines."
His eyes narrowed slightly, and a hint of a smirk played at the corner of his lips. "Good. Letā€™s see if your actions match your confidence."
The tension between you two was palpable, and the rest of the team took notice almost immediately.
"They fight like an old married couple," Derek muttered under his breath, nudging Emily as the two of you clashed in yet another heated debate. There was a flicker of surprise in his eyes, watching you stand toe-to-toe with Hotchā€”a rare sight, considering most people didn't dare to challenge his authority so openly.
"She's got guts," Emily said, raising her eyebrows in amusement. "I donā€™t think Iā€™ve ever seen anyone go head-to-head with Hotch like that. And he's actually... engaging?"
Derek let out a low chuckle. "Oh, he's definitely engaging. Usually, he shuts people down in seconds flat, but with her? Heā€™s giving as good as he gets."
Emily grinned, shaking her head in disbelief. "Think they realize they're basically the same person?"
"Not a chance," Derek replied with a smirk. "Theyā€™re too stubborn to see it. And honestly, Iā€™m not sure I want to be around when they do."
The rest of the team exchanged amused, almost disbelieving glances. It was clear theyā€™d never seen Hotch behave like this before. He wasn't just tolerating your defiance; he seemed almost... entertained by it, as if he was finally facing someone who could match his intensity and push back just as hard.
And while you both seemed entirely focused on proving the other wrong, the team couldnā€™t help but notice the way Hotch's lips twitched ever so slightly when you fired back at himā€”a hint of a smile that suggested he was enjoying the sparring far more than he let on.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The case had taken a toll on everyone. It was late, the team was exhausted, and emotions were running high. As you laid out your plan to corner the unsub at the next location, Hotch cut you off mid-sentence.
"No, that won't work," he said firmly, his voice colder than usual. "You're making assumptions without enough evidence to back them up. We need to think this through logically."
You clenched your jaw, trying to keep your temper in check. "I am thinking logically, Hotchner. If we don't act fast, we'll lose any chance we have of catching this guy before he strikes again. We have to take the risk."
"And that's exactly the problem," he snapped, his eyes boring into yours. "You're too impulsive. This job isnā€™t about charging in headfirst without a solid plan."
Your hands balled into fists at your sides, the frustration bubbling over. "I'm not impulsive! Iā€™m trying to save lives, which, correct me if Iā€™m wrong, is the point of this whole job. But you wouldn't know anything about taking risks, would you, Hotch? You always play it safe, no matter what it costs."
A flash of anger crossed his face, and he took a step closer, his voice lowering to a dangerously calm tone. "You donā€™t know a damn thing about what it costs, Y/L/N. Iā€™m not playing it safe; Iā€™m making sure my team comes home alive. Something you might want to consider before throwing yourself into situations youā€™re not ready for."
The team watched in stunned silence. No one dared to intervene as you and Hotch stared each other down, both too stubborn to back down. They were used to disagreements in the field, but this level of intensity was something newā€”even for Hotch.
"Iā€™m not some rookie you can bully into submission," you said, voice shaking with barely restrained fury. "Iā€™m here because Iā€™m damn good at what I do. And maybe if you took your head out of your own ego for two seconds, youā€™d see that."
Hotch's jaw tightened, and for a moment, you thought he might actually shout back. But instead, he spoke in that calm, unnervingly quiet voice of his. "The minute your 'damn good' plan puts any of my team at risk, Iā€™ll pull you off this case so fast, you wonā€™t know what hit you."
The team exchanged uneasy glances. It was clear this wasnā€™t just about the caseā€”it was about control, about power, and about two people who couldnā€™t stand the fact that they met their match in each other.
As you turned on your heel to walk away, you couldnā€™t help but notice the looks on the faces of your colleagues. They weren't just surprised by how fiercely you stood up to Hotchā€”they were stunned that he actually seemed to respect you more for it.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The case wrapped up successfully, just as you had predicted. Your plan, the one Hotch had so firmly shot down, ended up being the key to cornering the unsub. It wasnā€™t without risks, but in the end, it worked, and no one could argue with the results.
As the team gathered their gear, Hotch remained silent, his face stoic as always, though there was a flicker of something else in his eyesā€”a mix of reluctant admiration and irritation that he couldnā€™t quite mask.
Rossi, ever the perceptive one, sidled up to Hotch with a knowing smile. "You know, Aaron," he said, his tone dripping with amusement, "it wouldnā€™t kill you to admit when youā€™re wrong. I mean, it's not every day someone out-thinks the great Aaron Hotchner."
Hotch shot Rossi a pointed look, his jaw tightening just slightly. "I wasnā€™t wrong," he muttered defensively. "I was... cautious."
Rossi let out a chuckle, shaking his head. "Cautious? Is that what weā€™re calling it now?" He cast a glance in your direction, where you stood a little ways off, giving instructions to a local officer. "She was right, you know. And from the look on your face, I'd say you know it too."
Hotch's gaze flicked back to you, the tiniest hint of a smile tugging at his lips before he quickly wiped it away. "She was lucky," he said, more to himself than to Rossi, as if trying to convince himself of that fact.
Rossi raised an eyebrow, smirking. "Right. Lucky.ā€
Hotch opened his mouth to argue, then thought better of it. Instead, he gave a noncommittal grunt and turned his attention back to his paperwork, his expression a mask of irritation mixed with something that looked suspiciously like pride.
"Youā€™re a tough nut to crack," Rossi said, his tone softer now, more serious. "But maybe thatā€™s exactly why sheā€™s the perfect match for you."
Hotch shot Rossi a glare, but it lacked its usual sharpness. "Donā€™t start, Rossi," he warned, though there was no real heat in his voice.
Rossi simply laughed, clapping Hotch on the shoulder. "Just saying, my friend. Sooner or later, you might want to let that wall of yours come downā€”before she knocks it down for you."
As Rossi walked away, Hotch allowed himself one last glance in your direction. He'd never admit it out loud, but in that moment, he couldn't help but feel a grudging respect for youā€”along with a nagging realization that maybe, just maybe, this wasn't the last time you'd get under his skin.
But he wasn't ready to give you the satisfaction of knowing that. Not yet.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
Weeks passed, and while your clashes with Hotch became routine, you couldn't deny that you had developed a strange rhythm with him. You knew each otherā€™s moves like pieces on a chessboardā€”always anticipating, always one step ahead.
Despite your frequent arguments, there was a mutual respect building beneath the surface that neither of you wanted to acknowledge.
During a late-night case discussion, Hotch had his arms crossed, leaning against the table. "Your theory is flawed," he said, his voice laced with skepticism.
You squared your shoulders, refusing to back down. "Itā€™s not flawed. Youā€™re just too stubborn to admit that my way might actually work."
Hotch raised an eyebrow, his eyes glinting with a challenge. "If I admit you're right, does that mean you'll stop trying to strangle me in these meetings?"
Your lips twisted into a smirk. "Don't flatter yourself, Hotchner. If I ever strangle you, itā€™ll be out of pure frustration."
Hotch leaned in, his voice dropping to a low rumble. "Oh, Y/N, I didnā€™t know you were into that."
You blinked in surprise, your cheeks heating slightly at his boldness, but you quickly recovered. "Only if it shuts you up," you shot back, trying to ignore the way your pulse quickened.
The rest of the team watched from a distance, exchanging amused glances. They could see the crackling energy between you two, even if you both stubbornly refused to acknowledge it.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The air between you and Hotch was still charged, the underlying tension refusing to fade. The rest of the team had taken to watching your interactions like a live sportā€”wondering who would land the next verbal blow.
You were in the middle of the bullpen, poring over case files, when Hotch approached, his expression as stern as ever. "Y/L/N," he said, his tone clipped and professional, "I need your analysis on the suspect's profile by end of day. And make sure itā€™s thorough this time."
You looked up, eyebrow arched. "Oh, donā€™t worry, Hotchner. Iā€™ll make it as ā€˜thoroughā€™ as you like," you replied, your voice dripping with sarcasm. "Wouldnā€™t want you to have to redo it when you realize I was right all along."
Hotchā€™s eyes narrowed slightly, a flicker of irritation sparking to life. "This isnā€™t a contest, Y/L/N. Itā€™s about accuracy and professionalismā€”two things you might want to brush up on."
You stood up, matching his gaze with equal intensity. "And maybe if you stopped micromanaging every move I make, youā€™d see that I know exactly what Iā€™m doing."
The tension between you was thick enough to cut with a knife, both of you glaring at each other like two opposing forces locked in an endless struggle. The bullpen went silent, eyes darting between the two of you in surprise at how openly you challenged himā€”again.
Hotch opened his mouth to retort, but then he paused, his gaze softening just a fraction. He seemed to consider his next words carefully, as if he knew he was about to cross a line he wasnā€™t ready to cross.
"You know," he said slowly, his voice dangerously calm, "for someone who claims to know what they're doing, you spend a lot of time second-guessing your decisions. Almost like youā€™re afraid to be wrong."
You bristled, feeling the sting of his words hit a little too close to home. "Iā€™m not afraid to be wrong," you shot back, eyes blazing with defiance. "Iā€™m just not used to being treated like an amateur by someone who refuses to admit when theyā€™re outmatched."
Hotchā€™s lips twitched, a brief flash of something resembling a smile crossing his face before he quickly hid it. "Outmatched? By you?" he said, raising an eyebrow. "If thatā€™s what keeps you motivated, Agent Y/L/N, then by all meansā€”keep believing it."
Before you could fire back, Rossiā€™s voice broke through the tension. "You two done sparring, or should we set up a ring in the conference room?" he quipped, amusement dancing in his eyes.
The rest of the team chuckled, clearly entertained by the ongoing battle between you and Hotch. Despite their jokes, they were all aware that there was something different about the way Hotch responded to youā€”how he engaged with you in a way he didnā€™t with anyone else.
"You know," Morgan added with a grin, "most people donā€™t stand up to Hotch like that. You must really like getting on his bad side."
"Sheā€™s practically setting up camp there," Garcia chimed in with a wink. "Itā€™s like their own twisted form of bonding."
You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest. "Please. If I ever start bonding with Hotchner, you have my permission to stage an intervention."
Hotch cleared his throat, shooting the team a look that was more amused than annoyed. "Alright, that's enough," he said, but there was a softness to his tone that wasn't there before, a hint that maybeā€”just maybeā€”he respected you for pushing back.
As the team dispersed, Hotch caught your gaze one last time. The moment was brief, but it lingered just long enough to make you question whether all this fighting was really about animosityā€”or if it was something else altogether.
And just like that, the fire between you reignited, burning hotter than ever.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The team was in the middle of a tense operation, a situation that demanded quick thinking and decisive action. You had taken a calculated risk, making a call in the field that didn't go as planned. The unsub got away, and while no one was hurt, it set the case back significantly.
The second you returned to the makeshift command center, Hotch was waiting for you, his eyes dark and unreadable. You barely had a chance to open your mouth before he was on you.
"What the hell were you thinking?" he barked, stepping closer, his voice rough with barely restrained anger. "That decision of yours just put everyone at risk, and I'm not sure we can afford that kind of recklessness again."
You shot back, adrenaline still coursing through your veins. "I was thinking that if we didnā€™t take the shot, weā€™d lose our best lead! But of course, you'd rather sit around playing it safe while the unsub walks free!"
Hotch's eyes narrowed, and his jaw clenched so tightly it looked like it might crack. "This isn't about playing it safe, Y/L/N! It's about not acting like a reckless amateur who puts the entire team's lives at risk because they have something to prove!"
Your hands shook with the force of your frustration, and before you could stop yourself, you snapped, "Oh, spare me the lecture, Hotchner! You act like you're the only one who knows how to do this job, but the truth is, you're just terrified of making a mistake. Youā€™re so damn scared of letting anyone in that you push people away the second they donā€™t fit your perfect mold!"
The words seemed to hit Hotch harder than you expected, his eyes darkening even further. He took a step closer, his voice dropping to a dangerously quiet tone. "You think you know me, Y/L/N? You donā€™t know a damn thing. At least Iā€™m not so afraid of being alone that I act like I donā€™t need anyone. You're more isolated than anyone on this team, and the saddest part? You overcompensate by pretending you donā€™t care."
Your breath hitched, but you were too angry to back down. "Oh, that's rich coming from you, Hotchner! The great Aaron Hotchner, whoā€™s too afraid to be human around us because it might make him seem weak. You can't even let people in enough to let them see that you're a father first, can you? You act like this job is all that defines you, but deep down, you know you're failing at the one thing that really matters."
The moment the words left your mouth, you saw the flash of pain in Hotch's eyesā€”a wound laid bare for everyone to see. But before you could take it back, before you could even blink, Hotch struck back, and this time, it was a direct hit.
"You donā€™t get to talk to me about failure," he said, voice shaking with a mix of anger and hurt. "You walk around here like you have something to prove, like if youā€™re tough enough, no one will notice how desperately you need to be part of somethingā€”anythingā€”to avoid facing how alone you really are. But here's the truth: no matter how loud you are, no matter how many arguments you win, youā€™re still just trying to convince yourself that youā€™re enough."
The team collectively held their breath, the weight of the confrontation settling over them like a dark cloud. You could see the shock and discomfort on their faces, how they tried to look away as if that would lessen the impact of the words you and Hotch had just exchanged.
You opened your mouth, ready to deliver one final blow, but something in his eyes stopped you. The hurt, the frustration, the betrayalā€”it was all there, mirrored in your own gaze. And you knew, in that moment, that youā€™d gone too far. So had he.
Before either of you could say another word, a voice crackled over the comms, interrupting the heated exchange. "We have a new lead on the unsub," Garciaā€™s voice came through, urgent and breathless. "I need you back at the command center, ASAP."
The tension snapped, and you both pulled back, breathing hard, eyes locked in a shared look of something like regret. You could see itā€”the recognition that the words youā€™d thrown at each other couldnā€™t be taken back.
Without a word, you turned and walked away, your shoulders tense, refusing to let anyone see how deeply the argument had cut. Hotch stood there for a moment longer, his face an unreadable mask, before he, too, walked in the opposite direction, his movements stiff and deliberate.
As you both moved to your respective corners, the team exchanged glancesā€”expressions of concern, sadness, and a little fear. Even they could tell that this fight had gone way beyond professional differences. It had become personal. Too personal.
"You think they'll be okay?" JJ asked softly, breaking the silence that had settled over them.
Rossi shook his head, his face lined with worry. "Not sure," he said, glancing over at the two of you from a distance. "That was more than just anger. That was hurt. And thatā€™s a lot harder to come back from."
Derek looked from you to Hotch and back again, his face serious. "They both know they crossed a line," he said quietly. "But the question is, can they find their way back?"
Hotch knew heā€™d struck too close to home, just as you did. The damage was done, and as much as you both wanted to pretend it didnā€™t matter, you couldnā€™t shake the feeling that something between you had changed forever.
And for the first time since you joined the BAU, neither of you was sure how to fix it.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
In the days that followed your explosive argument, neither you nor Hotch said a word about what had happened. Both of you were too stubborn to apologize, too proud to admit that you might have gone too far. But even as the tension between you remained thick and uncomfortable, something in the way you interacted began to shift.
Despite your so-called hatred, you and Hotch started doing little things for each otherā€”things that neither of you ever mentioned aloud. He'd leave a coffee on your desk, exactly how you liked it, when youā€™d had a particularly rough night. Youā€™d order lunch for him when he was too buried in paperwork to take a break. It was as if you were both trying to say "I'm sorry" without actually uttering the words.
The team noticed the change, the way you two danced around each other, trying to make up for the damage in the only way you knew howā€”without acknowledging it outright.
And whenever one of you tried to express gratitude, it always came out as an insult wrapped in sarcasm.
"Thanks for the coffee, Hotchner," you said one morning, not meeting his eyes. The words were gruff, but there was a softness beneath them that you couldnā€™t quite hide. "I didnā€™t realize you were capable of being considerate."
Hotch shrugged, a faint smile tugging at his lips. "Donā€™t get used to it, Y/L/N," he replied, voice laced with mock indifference. "Just trying to keep you from falling asleep in the middle of your presentations. Wouldnā€™t want you to embarrass yourself in front of the team."
You rolled your eyes, a reluctant smile breaking through despite your best efforts to stay annoyed. "Oh please, Hotchner. If I did fall asleep, itā€™d probably be because your voice has all the excitement of a tax seminar."
He gave a small chuckle, the tension between you two easing just slightly, even if neither of you would admit it. It was as if every sarcastic comment and light jab carried with it a hidden messageā€”"Iā€™m sorry," "I didnā€™t mean it," "I care more than I should."
And so, the unspoken apologies continued, buried beneath layers of pride and wrapped in your shared rhythm of bickering. The gestures were subtle but unmistakable, a silent acknowledgment that despite the walls you both put up, you were trying to make things right in the only way you knew how.
But even then, the fire between you still burned hot, and neither of you could quite bring yourself to let go of the pretense of animosity. Not yet.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The days were filled with a strange tensionā€”one that wasnā€™t entirely unpleasant. The biting remarks between you and Hotch were still there, but they were laced with something different now, something that had the team raising their eyebrows and sharing knowing looks. The biting anger had started to twist into something that almost resembledā€¦flirting.
One afternoon, you were both standing by the coffee machine, trying to get through another endless stack of case files. You reached for the last cup of coffee at the same time as Hotch, your hands brushing against each other. You snatched it up quickly, smirking in his direction.
"Careful, Hotchner," you said, raising the cup to your lips. "You keep getting in my way like this, and I might just have to pin you to the wall."
Hotchā€™s eyes glinted with amusement as he raised an eyebrow, leaning in slightly. "Bold move, Y/L/N," he replied, a slow smile spreading across his face. "Didn't realize you were in the habit of getting physical on the job."
Your breath caught for a second, but you quickly recovered, narrowing your eyes at him with a teasing smile. "Only when someone deserves it," you shot back, your voice light but your gaze steady. "And trust me, Hotchner, you've earned it."
He smirked, the kind of smile that made it clear he enjoyed pushing your buttons, and that little spark in his eyes hinted at something more than just professional rivalry. "Iā€™ll try to contain my excitement," he said, voice smooth and challenging, the playful banter lingering in the air between you.
You opened your mouth to fire back a retort, but no words came out. Instead, you found yourself laughingā€”a real, genuine laugh that caught both of you off guard. The sound of it seemed to disarm Hotch for a moment, his expression softening as he looked at you.
"Just admit it," he said, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. "Youā€™d miss our arguments if they stopped."
You raised an eyebrow, pretending to think about it. "Iā€™d miss putting you in your place, Hotch. But donā€™t get used to itā€”Iā€™m still keeping score, and Iā€™m winning."
Hotch let out a low chuckle. "Weā€™ll see about that."
The team observed from a distance, exchanging amused glances at the way you two were sparring. But this time, it wasn't just hostilityā€”it was something far more complicated, like the first sparks of a fire that neither of you wanted to put out.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The night had not gone the way youā€™d hoped. The date youā€™d forced yourself to go onā€”an attempt to prove to yourself that you could open up to someone, anyoneā€”ended as all the others did: in disappointment. Youā€™d spent the entire evening trying to connect, trying to be someone you werenā€™t, only to come home with that familiar ache in your chest and a little too much wine in your system.
Stumbling slightly, you sank onto a bench outside the bar, phone in hand, replaying Hotch's words in your mind from your previous argument. "Youā€™re more isolated than anyone on this team, and the saddest part? You overcompensate by pretending you donā€™t care."
The truth of it stung more now than ever. You felt the weight of his words pressing down on you, and you didn't have the strength to fight against it. Maybe he was right, you thought bitterly. Maybe I am going to end up alone because I can't let anyone in.
Before you could stop yourself, your fingers dialed his number, the alcohol-fueled haze making you braverā€”or more foolishā€”than you would have been otherwise. The phone rang once, and then you heard his familiar voice, steady and calm.
"Hotchner," he answered.
You hesitated, suddenly feeling ridiculous for calling him of all people. But then, you let out a shaky breath and said, "I...I donā€™t know why I called you. Iā€™m fine. Iā€™mā€”" Your voice cracked slightly, betraying you. "I'm not fine."
He didnā€™t ask you where you were. He didnā€™t hesitate or question why youā€™d reached out to him. Instead, his voice softened, and you could almost hear the worry in it. "Tell me where you are, Y/N," he said, his tone more gentle than youā€™d ever heard it. "Iā€™m already on my way."
You told him the name of the bar, and before you knew it, Hotchā€™s car pulled up to the curb. He got out, looking every bit the composed leader he always was, but there was something else in his eyesā€”something softer as he took in your disheveled state.
Without a word, he draped his coat around your shoulders and led you to the passenger seat. The drive was quiet, the hum of the car the only sound between you. You kept your eyes on the window, embarrassed by your outburst but too drained to put your walls back up.
When he pulled up to your place, he helped you out of the car, his hand lingering at your back, a silent comfort. You let him guide you up the steps to your door, but when you fumbled for your keys, he stopped you, turning you to face him.
"You didnā€™t have to come get me," you said, your voice small, more vulnerable than you wanted it to be. "Iā€™m just a mess tonight."
He looked at you, really looked at you, and for a moment, you saw the mask he always wore slip just a little. "Youā€™re not a mess, Y/N," he said quietly. "Youā€™re human. We all are."
You laughed bitterly, shaking your head. "You don't get it, Hotch. I keep trying to let people in, and I can't. It's like there's this wall I can't tear down, and I'm starting to think Iā€™m going to end up just as alone as you said."
Hotch's jaw tightened, and he reached out, gently tucking a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "Youā€™re not alone," he said, his voice low, almost tender. "And for what it's worth, I never meant to make you feel that way. Youā€™re tougher than anyone I know, but you donā€™t always have to be."
You looked up at him, feeling the weight of his words settle in a place deep in your chest. For once, there was no sarcasm, no biting remarksā€”just a quiet honesty that took you by surprise.
"Why did you come?" you asked, your voice barely more than a whisper. "After everything I said to you?"
Hotch hesitated for a moment, his eyes searching yours, and then he said, "Because I know you. And I knew that when you finally let your guard down, even a little, it wasnā€™t something youā€™d do lightly." His voice softened even further. "I couldnā€™t just leave you alone tonight."
The silence stretched between you, heavy with unspoken words. He moved closer, his hand still resting on your shoulder, and you let yourself lean into his touch, even if just a little.
He just stood there with you, holding you steady when you couldnā€™t hold yourself up, letting you see that maybe, just maybe, letting him in wasnā€™t as terrifying as youā€™d thought.
"Thank you," you finally said, looking up at him with something that felt like gratitude mixed with a hint of something deeper, something you werenā€™t ready to name yet.
Hotch gave you a small, almost shy smile. "Anytime, Y/N," he said simply. "And for the record, Iā€™m not going anywhere."
You nodded, the walls between you still there, but just a little lower now. And as you stepped into your apartment, you knew that this was the beginning of something differentā€”something you werenā€™t ready to admit but couldnā€™t deny anymore.
The fire between you still burned, but it felt like a fire that could warm you instead of one that would consume you.
The door clicked shut behind you, the weight of the nightā€™s events settling over you like a heavy blanket. Hotch stood in your entryway, his hands in his pockets, looking more out of place than youā€™d ever seen him. This was Aaron Hotchner, the unflinching leader of the BAU, but right now, he looked like a man unsure of what to do next.
You leaned back against the wall, running a hand through your hair and letting out a sigh. "Iā€™m not usually like this," you said, your voice rough around the edges, still tinged with the effects of the alcohol. "I donā€™t usually call for help."
Hotch gave a small, almost reluctant smile, his eyes softening as they met yours. "I know," he said quietly. "Youā€™d rather bite off your own arm than ask for help. Thatā€™s why I came."
You blinked at him, a bit taken aback by the way he said it, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. The honesty in his eyes made something in your chest tightenā€”a mix of frustration and relief that you couldnā€™t quite put into words.
"You think you have me all figured out, donā€™t you?" you muttered, looking away to avoid the intensity of his gaze.
Hotchā€™s lips twitched into a smirk, that familiar fire sparking back to life in his eyes. "Well, you do have a habit of making it a challenge," he said, his voice taking on that dry, teasing tone. "But youā€™re not as complicated as you think, Y/N. I see right through that tough act of yours."
You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest in a weak attempt to shield yourself from the truth of his words. "Oh, please, Hotchner," you said, trying to regain some of your usual bite. "The last thing I need is you trying to psychoanalyze me."
Hotch took a step closer, his gaze never leaving yours. He was close enough now that you could see the concern etched in the lines of his face, the way he was holding back something he wanted to say. "Youā€™re right," he said, his voice gentler now, almost a whisper. "Iā€™m not here to analyze you. Iā€™m here because I care."
Those last words hit you like a punch to the gut, the sincerity in his tone catching you completely off guard. You opened your mouth to say something, anything to deflect, but all that came out was a shaky breath.
"You care?" you repeated, a mixture of disbelief and sarcasm lacing your voice. "Is this the part where you tell me youā€™re my knight in shining armor?"
Hotch let out a small, rueful laugh, shaking his head slightly. "Hardly," he said, a hint of that familiar smirk creeping back. "More like the guy who has to keep you from making a fool of yourself because youā€™re too stubborn to admit youā€™re human."
You wanted to snap back, to put up the walls again, but you were too tired, too raw. Instead, you just looked at him, really looked at him, and saw something in his eyes that you hadn't allowed yourself to see beforeā€”genuine concern, warmth, something that made you feel seen in a way you hadnā€™t in a long time.
"You know," you said, your voice quieter, softer than it had been all night. "Youā€™re kind of infuriating."
Hotchā€™s smirk grew into a smile, the kind that crinkled the corners of his eyes in that rare, almost boyish way that you hardly ever saw. "And youā€™re impossible," he replied. "But weā€™ve established that already, havenā€™t we?"
For a moment, you both just stood there, the air between you thick with unspoken words. You shouldā€™ve felt awkward, but instead, there was a strange comfort in the silence, like you were both finally seeing each other without all the defenses in place.
You let out a deep breath and nodded toward the couch. "Stay," you said, surprising even yourself. "Just for a while. I could use the company."
He didnā€™t argue. Hotch gave a small nod and moved to sit on the couch, his movements careful, deliberate, as if he didnā€™t want to push too hard, too fast. You sat down beside him, not too close but not as far as you might have a few weeks ago.
The two of you sat in silence for a few minutes, your head leaning back against the couch, your eyes closing as you tried to process everything. You felt Hotchā€™s presence beside you, solid and grounding, the quiet rhythm of his breathing strangely soothing.
"Thank you," you finally said, breaking the silence, the words almost too quiet to hear. "For coming to get me. Forā€¦not letting me be alone tonight."
Hotch turned to look at you, and when you opened your eyes, his gaze was softer than youā€™d ever seen it. "Anytime," he said simply. "And I mean that, Y/N. You donā€™t have to go through everything on your own."
You felt something crack open inside you, just a littleā€”a small space where the walls had been, making room for him in a way you never thought youā€™d allow. And maybe, just maybe, that terrified you even more than anything else.
As you both sat there in the quiet, the tension between you still simmering but somehow warmer now, you realized that for all your fights, your arguments, and your stubborn pride, you didnā€™t hate him. Not even close.
You didnā€™t say anything more that night. You didnā€™t have to. The silence said enough, and for once, neither of you felt the need to fill it with words.
The fire between you had shifted, turning into something new, something unspoken but undeniably there. You didnā€™t feel quite so alone.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The next morning, the BAU office buzzed with its usual energy, but everything felt different. The night before lingered in the back of your mind like a half-remembered dream, and you couldnā€™t quite shake the image of Hotch sitting beside you on the couch, his quiet presence more comforting than youā€™d ever expected.
You walked into the bullpen, forcing yourself to adopt the mask of professionalism you always wore, your steps just a touch more deliberate to hide any trace of a hangover or vulnerability. You were determined to pretend like nothing had changed, like the night before was just a glitch in your well-oiled machine of stubborn denial.
But as soon as you stepped into the room, you felt Hotchā€™s eyes on you. He was at his desk, his expression calm and controlled, but there was something different in the way he looked at youā€”softer, more attentive, like he was seeing you in a way he hadnā€™t before.
You met his gaze, and for a second, the rest of the office seemed to fade away. His eyes held yours, and you could feel that unspoken connection between you, the memory of his steadying hand on your back, his whispered words in the dark.
But then you broke the gaze, clearing your throat and throwing up your usual walls. "Morning, Hotchner," you said briskly, moving past his desk like it was business as usual. "Letā€™s hope youā€™re ready to keep up today. Wouldnā€™t want to have to drag you along."
Hotchā€™s lips twitched into that familiar half-smirk, but there was something in his eyes that wasnā€™t there beforeā€”something almost like pride. "Careful, Y/L/N," he said in that smooth, controlled voice of his. "If youā€™re not careful, people might start to think youā€™re actually enjoying this partnership."
You opened your mouth to fire back a retort, but JJ and Morgan chose that moment to walk in, their eyes darting curiously between the two of you. You could see the knowing smiles tugging at their lips, and you knew theyā€™d sensed the shift in the air.
"Everything okay over here?" Morgan asked, a teasing lilt to his voice. "I thought I saw sparks flying for a second there."
You rolled your eyes, crossing your arms over your chest to regain some semblance of your defenses. "Please, Morgan," you said, a hint of sarcasm in your tone. "If I wanted sparks, Iā€™d go rub two sticks together in the woods."
"Uh-huh," JJ said with a grin, not missing the way Hotchā€™s eyes followed you, a little softer than they usually were. "Well, you two seem to have your own language these days. Should we be worried?"
Hotch straightened in his chair, his expression slipping back into that stoic professionalism, but you caught the flicker of amusement in his eyes. "I think you have more important things to worry about," he said evenly, glancing at the case files on the table. "Like solving this case."
Morgan shot you a sideways glance, his grin widening. "Man, they really do bicker like an old married couple," he said under his breath to JJ, loud enough for you and Hotch to hear.
You rolled your eyes dramatically, but you couldnā€™t quite hide the smile tugging at the corner of your lips. "Keep dreaming, Morgan," you said, flicking your gaze to Hotch for a split second before turning back to the files. "If I ever settle down, itā€™ll be with someone who actually listens."
You didnā€™t miss the way Hotchā€™s eyebrow twitched at that comment, the slightest hint of a challenge in his eyes. He gave you a look that said he was holding back somethingā€”something that both of you were too stubborn to acknowledge.
"Who said anything about settling down?" Hotch replied, voice smooth as ever. "I thought you were the kind of person who lives for the argument."
"And I thought you were the kind of person who likes to be right," you shot back, smirking. "Guess weā€™ve both been wrong about each other."
There it wasā€”the unspoken truth lying between you both, hidden beneath the layers of sarcasm and banter. You could feel the shift, the way your arguments had started to feel less like battles and more like dances, each of you knowing the otherā€™s moves before they even made them.
As the day wore on, you found yourself glancing at Hotch more often than you cared to admit, catching him looking at you with that same intense focus that he usually reserved for unsubs. The problem was, this time, you werenā€™t sure whether he was profiling you or trying to figure out how to get past your defenses.
Later in the day, as you grabbed another cup of coffee, you felt his presence next to you before he even said a word. He reached for a file on the counter, leaning in slightly closer than necessary, and murmured just loud enough for you to hear, "I meant what I said last night, you know."
You blinked, momentarily caught off guard. "Which part?" you asked, trying to sound nonchalant but failing miserably.
Hotch's gaze held yours, unflinching, unwavering. "The part about not going anywhere," he said softly. "And the part about you not having to be alone. Not if you donā€™t want to be."
You swallowed hard, the words sticking in your throat. You knew what he was offeringā€”a chance to let him in, to take that next step, whatever that might be. And it terrified you more than youā€™d ever admit.
"Thatā€™s a dangerous game, Hotchner," you said, trying to deflect with a smirk, even though your heart was pounding in your chest.
Hotch gave you that slow, almost maddening smile that seemed to unravel something deep within you. What you couldnā€™t seeā€”what he hid beneath that calm exteriorā€”was the way his mind was still racing with everything that had happened the night before. The way you'd let your guard down, even for just a moment, had left him more shaken than he wanted to admit.
He wasnā€™t a man who let people in easily; it took a lot for his interest to be piqued, to feel something more than detached professionalism. But youā€”you had managed to get under his skin. He hadnā€™t been able to stop thinking about that glimpse into your world, the vulnerability you showed him when you thought no one else was watching. It was raw, real, and it stirred something in him that he didnā€™t want to let go of.
He was intrigued by you in a way he hadnā€™t been in a long time, and now that heā€™d seen that side of youā€”the part you kept hidden from everyone elseā€”he didnā€™t want you to close that door again. He wanted more than just the sharp banter and the fiery arguments. He wanted to see the layers beneath, to understand the person you were when the armor came off.
There was this part of him that saw you as this rare enigma, but also a part that saw a mirror looking back at him--someone who finally carried their world in the same way as he did.Ā 
"Youā€™ve never been one to play it safe, Y/N," he replied, his voice low and warm, the hint of a challenge still lingering. "Why start now?"
There was a flicker of something in his eyes, something almost like hope mixed with determination. He was giving you a choice, but deep down, he knew he didnā€™t want you to pull away, to retreat back into the walls youā€™d built so carefully around yourself.
You didnā€™t have an answer for that. At least, not one you were ready to give him. The truth was, the idea of letting him inā€”of letting anyone inā€”scared you more than you wanted to admit. But his steady gaze, the way he was looking at you as if he was ready to hold that door open as long as it took for you to walk through it, made it harder to hide.
So instead, you just nodded, your walls still there but not quite as high as theyā€™d been before. "Weā€™ll see," you said softly, more to yourself than to him. "Weā€™ll see."
And as you turned away, you couldnā€™t help but feel the weight of his eyes still on you, watching, waiting. Hotch knew that if you closed yourself off now, it would be ten times harder to find his way back in. But he also knew he couldnā€™t push youā€”not yet. All he could do was make sure that when you were ready to open that door again, heā€™d be right there, waiting for you.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
A few days passed since that quiet moment at the coffee machine, and while you tried to push it to the back of your mind, it kept creeping up on you. Hotchā€™s words, the look in his eyesā€”it all felt too real, too close, and you werenā€™t ready to let it unravel everything youā€™d built around yourself.
The trouble was, Hotch wasnā€™t making it any easier.
He was still his usual composed, authoritative self during briefings, but every now and then, youā€™d catch him watching you out of the corner of his eye, as if trying to figure out what was going on beneath your surface. It was disarming, the way he seemed to see straight through you, and it annoyed you to no end that you cared what he thought.
Today was no different. The team was deep into a new case, the type that pulled everyoneā€™s focus with its twists and turns, but you still felt that nagging awareness of Hotchā€™s gaze tracking your every move. You tried to shake it off, to focus solely on the details of the profile you were presenting, but when your eyes met his, you hesitated for a fraction of a secondā€”a slip that didnā€™t go unnoticed.
As you finished laying out your theory on the unsub, you expected Hotch to challenge you like he always did. Instead, he gave a small nod, his eyes never leaving yours. "Solid work, Y/L/N," he said, his voice steady, but there was a trace of something else in itā€”something that felt like he was acknowledging more than just your profiling skills.
Morgan raised an eyebrow at the rare praise coming from Hotch. "Wow, did I just hear that right?" he teased. "Hotch giving a compliment? Are we sure weā€™re not in an alternate universe?"
You rolled your eyes, fighting to keep the blush creeping up your neck from reaching your face. "Donā€™t get used to it," you shot back, forcing a smirk. "Iā€™m sure heā€™ll find something to disagree with in about five minutes."
But when you glanced back at Hotch, you caught the smallest hint of a smile pulling at his lips, like he was amused by your deflection. It was such a fleeting moment that if you hadnā€™t been watching him closely, you might have missed it. But it was there, and it sent a ripple through you that you couldnā€™t quite shake.
Later that evening, as the rest of the team wrapped up for the day, you found yourself alone in the conference room, staring at the evidence board. The case was getting under your skin in a way that you couldnā€™t quite explain, and you were too restless to go home.
"Working late?" Hotchā€™s voice broke through the silence, and you turned to find him leaning casually in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest. He looked at you with that same unreadable expression, and you hated how your pulse quickened at the sight of him.
"Just tying up loose ends," you said, your tone clipped, but even you could hear the exhaustion in your voice. "Canā€™t leave things half-finished."
He nodded slowly, stepping further into the room, his gaze never leaving you. "Youā€™ve been distracted," he said, not as a question, but as a statement of fact. "Is it the case, or something else?"
You let out a humorless laugh, shaking your head. "Always profiling, arenā€™t you?" you said, turning back to the board to avoid looking at him. "Maybe itā€™s both. Or maybe Iā€™m just tired of being stuck in my own head."
Hotch moved closer, close enough that you could feel his presence like a tangible weight in the room. "You know, you donā€™t always have to carry everything alone," he said quietly. "Youā€™re allowed to let someone in."
You turned to him then, your eyes locking onto his, the vulnerability of that night flashing in your mind. "I thought you knew me better than that, Hotchner," you said, your voice laced with a mix of defiance and something softer. "Iā€™m not good at letting people in."
Hotch held your gaze, and this time, he didnā€™t look away. "I know," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "But I also know that when you finally do, you donā€™t want to regret it."
The words hung between you like a dare, and for a second, you saw past the stoic exterior he always wore, straight into the man whoā€™d been just as guarded, just as wary of letting anyone see the cracks beneath his armor. It was unnerving and comforting all at once.
"I donā€™t want to close that door again," he admitted, his voice steady but his eyes revealing a flicker of uncertainty, as if saying it out loud made him vulnerable in a way he hadnā€™t been before. "You let me in, Y/N, even if it was just for a moment. And I donā€™t want to lose that."
You opened your mouth to respond, but the words died in your throat. You could feel your defenses crumbling, piece by piece, under the weight of his gaze, and it scared you. But it also made you feel something elseā€”something you werenā€™t ready to put a name to.
"I donā€™t know what you expect from me," you said finally, your voice softer, almost hesitant. "You know Iā€™m not the kind of person whoā€™s good at thisā€¦ at letting someone get close."
Hotchā€™s lips curved into that maddening, gentle smile, and he reached out, his fingers brushing lightly against your arm. It was a simple touch, but it sent a jolt of warmth through you. "Iā€™m not expecting anything," he said, his voice calm, reassuring. "I just donā€™t want you to shut me out when you donā€™t have to."
For once, you didnā€™t have a quick retort, no sarcastic comeback to throw up as a shield. Instead, you found yourself nodding, the smallest sign of surrender, as if silently agreeing to let thisā€”whatever it was between youā€”take its own course.
"Goodnight, Y/N," Hotch said softly, his hand lingering on your arm for just a moment longer before he turned to leave.
"Goodnight, Hotch," you replied, your voice barely more than a whisper as you watched him walk away.
As he disappeared through the doorway, you let out a breath you hadnā€™t realized youā€™d been holding. The fire between you wasnā€™t just simmering anymoreā€”it was building into something that felt inevitable, something that terrified and thrilled you all at once.
You didnā€™t feel the urge to run away from it.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
It had been a long week for the team, the kind that left everyone mentally and physically exhausted. The case had taken a toll on each of them, but none more so than Hotch. You could see it in the way his shoulders sagged slightly when he thought no one was looking, in the tightness around his eyes that no amount of professionalism could hide.
Heā€™d been quieter than usual, more distant, even with you. It was a stark contrast to the way heā€™d been drawing closer lately, as if heā€™d built up his walls all over again. And for some reason, that made something inside you ache.
You found him alone in his office late that evening, the light dim, a half-empty cup of coffee growing cold on his desk. The tension in his posture was palpable, and he didnā€™t look up when you knocked lightly on the doorframe.
"Hotch," you said softly, stepping inside without waiting for an invitation. "You look like youā€™re about to tear that case file in half. Whatā€™s going on?"
He didnā€™t answer at first. He just kept staring at the paper in front of him, his jaw clenched tight, the muscle ticking in his cheek. For a moment, you thought he might brush you off, that heā€™d snap back into his guarded self and shut you out completely.
But then he let out a slow, shaky breath and finally looked up at you. There was a weariness in his eyes that you hadnā€™t seen before, something raw and unguarded. "Itā€™s Jack," he said quietly, his voice barely more than a whisper. "I missed his soccer game today. I promised Iā€™d be there, and I missed it."
You blinked, surprised by the admission. It wasnā€™t like Hotch to let his personal life bleed into the job. He was the master of compartmentalization, always keeping his professional mask firmly in place. But right now, that mask was slipping, and you could see the guilt and pain beneath.
"Iā€™m sorry," you said, the words genuine and uncharacteristically soft. "I know how much he means to you."
He gave a short, humorless laugh, rubbing a hand over his face as if trying to scrub away the exhaustion. "Itā€™s not just that," he said, finally meeting your gaze. "I try so hard to be there for him, to make up for all the time I canā€™t get back. And every time I fail, it feels like Iā€™m failing him all over again."
You took a hesitant step closer, your defenses lowering in response to his vulnerability. "Youā€™re not failing him, Hotch," you said, your voice firmer now. "Jack knows youā€™re doing everything you can. Youā€™re a damn good father, even if you donā€™t give yourself enough credit."
Hotchā€™s eyes softened as he looked at you like he was seeing something in you that he hadnā€™t allowed himself to see before. "Itā€™s just hard," he said quietly. "Balancing everything. Being there for him and still being the kind of leader this team needs. Sometimes I donā€™t know if Iā€™m doing either one right."
You took another step closer, your hand hovering near his on the desk. "You donā€™t have to be perfect, Aaron," you said, using his first name intentionally, letting it roll off your tongue like a promise. "Youā€™re allowed to be human. To mess up. To let people help you when you need it."
His breath hitched slightly when you said his name, and you saw the way his defenses cracked just a little more, like he was allowing himself to believe you, even if just for a moment. "You say that," he said, a small, wry smile forming on his lips. "But youā€™re not exactly the poster child for letting people in either."
You felt a reluctant smile tug at your lips, even as your heart pounded in your chest. "TouchƩ," you said, your voice gentler now. "But maybe we could both stand to learn a little."
Hotch stared at you for a long moment, his eyes searching yours as if trying to decide whether he could really let you see himā€”really let you in. And then, almost imperceptibly, he reached out, his hand covering yours where it rested on the desk.
"You know," he said, his voice low and rough, "itā€™s easier for me to tell you not to close yourself off than it is to follow my own advice."
You looked down at his hand on yours, feeling the warmth of his touch seeping into your skin, and you squeezed his fingers lightly. "Yeah, well," you said, your voice soft but steady, "lucky for you, Iā€™m not going anywhere either."
His eyes softened even more at your words, a quiet gratitude filling them that made your chest tighten. He was letting you see himā€”not the stoic leader, not the unflinching profiler, but the man beneath all that. The one who was just as scared of opening up, just as afraid of failing the people he loved.
"Thank you," he said finally, his voice thick with emotion. "For this. For not letting me push you away."
You offered him a small smile, one that felt more real than anything youā€™d given him before. "Donā€™t thank me yet," you said, a teasing glint in your eyes. "Iā€™m still going to make your life hell in the field."
Hotch let out a soft chuckle, the sound breaking the tension in the room like a breath of fresh air. "Iā€™d expect nothing less," he said, the warmth returning to his gaze. "In fact, Iā€™d be disappointed if you didnā€™t."
The two of you stood there, hands still linked, the silence stretching out but not uncomfortable anymore. It was filled with a promise, an unspoken understanding that things had changed between youā€”that neither of you was quite as alone as you used to be.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The bullpen was buzzing with the usual chatter as the team wrapped up another case. The mood was lighter than it had been in days, and everyone seemed relieved to have a few moments to breathe. You stood at your desk, reviewing some final notes when you felt that familiar presence beside you.
"Y/L/N," Hotch said in his even tone, but there was a hint of playfulness in his eyes that only you could see. "I noticed a couple of discrepancies in your report. Care to explain?"
You raised an eyebrow, smirking slightly as you turned to face him. "Oh, Hotchner, I didnā€™t realize you were that nitpicky," you said, leaning in just a fraction. "I thought you were more of a big-picture kind of guy."
Hotchā€™s lips curved into that maddening smile, his eyes glinting with mischief. "Details matter," he replied, his voice dropping a notch. "And if I didnā€™t keep you on your toes, whereā€™s the fun in that?"
The rest of the team was watching this exchange with poorly concealed amusement. Morgan exchanged a look with JJ, and Garcia's eyes were practically sparkling with glee.
"You two are at it again," Morgan said, shaking his head with a grin. "I swear, the tension between you two is so thick we could cut it with a knife."
"More like set it on fire," JJ added, nudging Garcia, who was already leaning forward, her mouth wide with anticipation.
"Oh, please," you said with a mock roll of your eyes, but your smirk was undeniable. "If Hotchner could actually manage to light a fire, heā€™d probably try to put it out just to avoid making a mess."
Hotchā€™s eyebrow shot up at that, and he took a small step closer to you, his voice barely above a whisper but loud enough for everyone to hear. "I donā€™t know, Y/N," he said, his eyes locking onto yours with a challenging glint. "I think youā€™d be surprised at how good I am at playing with fire."
The room went silent for a beat, the rest of the team exchanging looks that screamed oh my God, did he just say that?
Garciaā€™s jaw dropped dramatically. "Okay, thatā€™s it!" she exclaimed, pointing between you and Hotch. "There is no way you two donā€™t have some unresolved sexual tension going on here. Spill the beans!"
You opened your mouth to retort, but before you could say anything, an alarm went off on the conference room monitor. Garciaā€™s eyes widened as she quickly typed on her laptop. "Weā€™ve got an urgent update from the field team," she said, all traces of her previous amusement gone. "It looks like the suspect we apprehended escaped during transfer."
Hotchā€™s face shifted instantly into his no-nonsense mode, all traces of flirtation gone as he snapped back into action. "Everyone, gather your gear," he ordered. "Weā€™re heading out now."
As you all hurried to grab your things, you felt Hotchā€™s hand on your arm, his grip just a bit tighter than usual. "Stay close," he said, his voice low and serious. "I donā€™t want any surprises."
You nodded, but there was a fire in his eyes that hadnā€™t been there beforeā€”a look that sent a thrill through you despite the situation. You didnā€™t have time to dwell on it as you jumped into the SUV, your focus shifting to the task at hand.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The stand-off had gone sideways fast. The unsub, cornered and desperate, made a reckless move, and in the chaos that followed, Hotch took a hitā€”a deep gash to his arm from a knife as he shielded you from the unsub. He stayed in control, his face a mask of determination as he secured the suspect, but you could see the pain etched in the tight lines around his mouth.
"Hotch!" you shouted, rushing to his side the second the threat was neutralized. Your heart was pounding in your chest, but you forced yourself to stay focused, your eyes darting over the wound. "You couldnā€™t just dodge or take a step back like a normal person?"
He gave you a half-smile that somehow still had that infuriating charm. "I had to make sure you had a clear shot," he said, his voice calm despite the blood seeping through his sleeve. "Besides, if Iā€™d let you take the hit, youā€™d never let me live it down."
"Yeah, well, now youā€™re stuck listening to me complain about your lack of self-preservation," you muttered, shaking your head even as you helped him over to the waiting ambulance.
The paramedics wasted no time guiding Hotch into the back of the ambulance, their hands moving efficiently as they assessed the wound. You followed closely, trying to keep your expression neutral, but the sight of blood seeping through his sleeve made your stomach twist with worry you couldnā€™t quite hide.
"How bad is it?" you asked the nearest paramedic, doing your best to sound calm even though your insides were in knots.
"Deep cut," the paramedic said as he worked quickly to clean and bandage Hotchā€™s arm. "Heā€™ll need stitches but no major damage. He got lucky."
Hotchā€™s eyes flicked up to yours, a small smirk forming on his lips despite the pain. "Lucky, huh?" he said, his voice slightly strained but still holding that familiar edge of sarcasm. "Looks like Iā€™m harder to get rid of than you thought."
You let out a shaky breath you didnā€™t realize youā€™d been holding, and for a moment, your guard slipped completely. The rush of adrenaline from the standoff was fading, leaving nothing but raw fear and relief in its wake. Without thinking, you reached out and gave his good shoulder a light but frustrated punch.
"You reckless idiot," you muttered, your voice cracking despite your best efforts to hold it steady. "Do you have any idea how worried I was? You scared the hell out of me, Hotch."
The words came out harsher than you intended, your emotions bubbling to the surface faster than you could control them. Hotchā€™s smirk softened into something gentler, more genuine, and he looked at you like he was seeing right through your bravado to the fear and vulnerability beneath.
"Y/N," he said quietly, his tone different nowā€”gentler, sincere. "I didnā€™t mean to worry you."
But before he could say anything more, you felt your chest tighten, overwhelmed by how close youā€™d come to losing him. Hotch reached out slowly, his uninjured hand wrapping around yours, holding on in a way that felt both grounding and intimate. His thumb brushed lightly over your knuckles, and you didnā€™t pull away.
Hotch hesitated, then reached out to gently touch your hand, his voice almost a whisper, "Iā€™m right here, even if you donā€™t know what to do with that."
You blinked rapidly, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill, and you squeezed his hand harder than you meant to.
"You infuriating man," you said, your voice trembling as you tried to hold onto the last shred of your composure. "You just had to go and make me care, didnā€™t you?"
The laugh that escaped Hotch was soft, almost disbelieving, and his eyes were filled with something youā€™d never seen beforeā€”something that made your chest tighten and your defenses crumble even more.
"Iā€™m glad you care," he said, so quietly that it was almost lost in the noise around you. "More than you know."
Your breath hitched at his words, and you bit your lip to keep the tears at bay. Desperate to deflect, you let go of his hand and turned away, taking a deep breath to steady yourself.
"You had to make me feel something, didnā€™t you?" you said, throwing him a wry smile over your shoulder as you blinked back the tears that refused to fall. "Next time, try not to make a mess of it, okay?"
Hotch's eyes softened as he looked at you, the smallest hint of a smile tugging at his lips despite the pain. "No promises," he said, a warmth in his gaze that wrapped around you like a lifeline. "But I'll try not to scare you again."
You nodded, biting your lip to keep your composure, and then without another word, you turned and walked away, each step heavier than the last. You needed to get some distance before you completely fell apart in front of him.
But as you reached the end of the ambulance, you heard his voice, softer and closer than you expected. "Y/N," he called out, making you pause. "You know Iā€™m not going anywhere, right?"
You didnā€™t turn back, but you felt the faintest smile tugging at your lips despite yourself. "Youā€™d better not," you said, voice just loud enough for him to hear. "Youā€™ve got a lot to make up for."
And as you walked away, you realized that letting him in didnā€™t feel like a mistakeā€”it felt like the only choice that made sense.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
Hours later, after a tense and exhausting standoff, the team finally returned to the BAU headquarters. Everyone was drained, their nerves frayed from the adrenaline crash, but there was a palpable sense of relief in the airā€”the suspect had been recaptured, and despite the close call, no one was seriously hurt.
But you couldnā€™t shake the image of Hotch sitting in the back of that ambulance, blood staining his sleeve, his eyes meeting yours with that maddening calmness he always managed to keep. The memory made your chest feel tight, like something was lodged there that you couldnā€™t swallow down.
You headed to the quiet of the briefing room, too wired to sit still. You started pacing, the adrenaline from the night's chaos still buzzing through your veins. All you could think about was how close youā€™d come to losing him and how much that realization had rattled you more than you wanted to admit.
Just as you were about to let out a frustrated sigh, you heard footsteps behind you. Turning around, you found Hotch standing in the doorway. His usually neat tie was loosened, and his composed demeanor seemed a little frayed around the edges.
"You okay?" he asked, his voice softer than usual, his gaze fixed on yours with an intensity that sent a shiver straight down your spine.
"Yeah," you said, but your voice wavered, betraying the emotions that had been building all night. "Just trying to come down from the rush, you know?"
Hotch stepped closer, the space between you shrinking, the room suddenly feeling too small to contain everything unspoken between you. His injured arm was bandaged, but he didnā€™t seem to notice or care. He was looking at you like you were the only thing in the room.
"You handled yourself well out there," he said, his voice steady but tinged with something elseā€”something like pride, mixed with relief and maybe even a touch of vulnerability. "You always do."
You gave a shaky smile, but you couldnā€™t help the words that slipped out next. "You didnā€™t have to get hurt for me to prove it, you know," you said, your voice cracking just a little. "What were you thinking out there?"
Hotch's lips twitched into a faint smile. "I was thinking," he said, meeting your eyes with that steady, unwavering gaze, "that if it came down to protecting you or getting a scratch, Iā€™d take the scratch every time."
You let out a breath, something between a laugh and a scoff, your defenses slipping in a way that was becoming too familiar. "Youā€™re impossible," you muttered, shaking your head. "Always playing the hero, arenā€™t you?"
"Only when it matters," he said softly, taking another step closer. His voice dropped to a whisper, the kind that sent a rush of warmth straight through you. "Youā€™re important to this teamā€”to me."
The air between you was crackling with the kind of tension that had been building for weeks, maybe even months. It was as if all the arguments, the banter, the fire had been leading up to this moment, and you both knew it.
"Hotch," you said, barely more than a whisper, taking a step closer to him. "What are we doing here?"
He took a deep breath, and you watched as his gaze flicked down to your lips for the briefest of moments before returning to meet your eyes. There was a crack in his usual stoic demeanor, the tiniest flicker of vulnerability shining through, like he was finally letting you see the part of him he always kept hidden from the world.
For once, Aaron Hotchner didnā€™t look like the unshakeable leader of the BAUā€”he looked like a man on the edge, torn between staying in control and letting his guard drop completely.
"I donā€™t know," he admitted, his voice rough, tinged with a hint of something youā€™d never heard from him beforeā€”fear, maybe, or hope. "Iā€™ve spent a long time pretending this wasnā€™t happening... I donā€™t think I can anymore."
He took another step closer, and you could see the hesitation in his eyes, like he was terrified of making a move that couldnā€™t be undone.Ā 
His voice softened, almost to a whisper, as he added, "Iā€™ve been trying to ignore this," he admitted softly, his eyes never leaving yours, "but itā€™s not that simple anymore."
The words hit you like a punch to the chest, knocking the air right out of your lungs. Youā€™d always known he was guarded, that he kept his distance as a way to protect himself, but hearing him say it out loud, seeing the raw vulnerability in his eyesā€”it shook you to your core.
For a heartbeat, you stood there, your emotions tangled, your heart pounding so loudly you were sure he could hear it. The weight of his words, the confession in his voice, crashed over you like a wave, breaking down every last wall youā€™d built between you.
"I donā€™t know how to do this either," you said, your own voice barely holding together, a touch of desperation leaking into your words. "Iā€™m so used to keeping people out, and then you come along andā€”" You shook your head, letting out a shaky breath. "You scare me, Hotch. This scares me."
His gaze softened even further, his thumb grazing over your knuckles as he reached for your hand, holding it like it was the most natural thing in the world. "You donā€™t have to be scared," he said, his voice so gentle it almost broke you. "Not with me."
The tenderness in his touch, the way his eyes held yours with so much quiet intensity, like you were the only person who existed in that momentā€”it was more than you could take. And then, with a boldness you didnā€™t know you had, you reached up, grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, and pulled him into a kiss that was anything but gentleā€”fierce, desperate, a release of all the frustration and desire youā€™d been bottling up for so long.
The moment your lips met, it was like the world stopped turning. The kiss was electric, searing, filled with all the unspoken words and pent-up tension that had been building between you. It wasnā€™t just a kiss; it was a collisionā€”a clash of everything youā€™d both held back, all the things you were too afraid to say out loud.
Hotch responded instantly, his good hand sliding to the small of your back, pulling you against him as if he was afraid youā€™d slip away. His kiss was just as intense as yours, almost rough, like he was staking a claim, like heā€™d been waiting for this moment just as long as you had. His fingers tangled in your hair, his breath mingling with yours, and he kissed you like he was pouring everything he had into itā€”all the fear, all the hope, all the need heā€™d been trying so hard to hide.
When you finally broke apart, gasping for breath, you saw that the mask had shattered completely. The intensity in his eyes was unlike anything youā€™d seen beforeā€”raw, open, unguarded. Finally, you saw Aaron Hotchner not as your stoic boss or your sparring partner but as the man who had somehow slipped past every defense youā€™d ever built.
"You," you whispered, your voice trembling with a mix of disbelief and relief, "You make everything so damn complicated."
Hotchā€™s lips curled into a slow, almost wicked smile, his thumb gently stroking your cheek as he held you close. "And you wouldnā€™t have it any other way," he said, his voice low, roughened with emotion.
"Maybe not," you said, a shaky laugh escaping despite the tears welling in your eyes. "But damn you, Hotchā€¦youā€™re going to ruin me."
He brushed his lips against your forehead, soft and lingering, his breath warm on your skin. "Only if you let me," he whispered a promise in his voice that made your chest tighten almost painfully. "And I really hope you let me."
At this moment, you realized that maybe letting your guard down wasnā€™t a sign of weakness; maybe it was the bravest thing youā€™d ever done. And maybe, just maybe, you were ready to be brave with him.
Just as the charged silence wrapped around you both, the door to the briefing room swung open. You and Hotch sprang apart, a little too quickly, both of you turning to see Derek Morgan standing there with an expression that was equal parts surprise and amusement.
Morgan's eyes flicked between you and Hotch, taking in the slightly disheveled look on both of your faces. A grin spread slowly across his face, and he raised an eyebrow in mock innocence. "Whoa," he said, holding up his hands as if surrendering. "Did I just walk in on something, or is this one of those 'don't ask, don't tell' situations?"
You felt your cheeks heat up instantly, your mind scrambling for a response. But before you could even open your mouth, Hotch, ever composed and unreadable, turned to Morgan with the kind of calm authority that only he could pull off.
"We're just wrapping up, Morgan," Hotch said, his voice steady, but there was the slightest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouthā€”one that only you seemed to notice. He kept his gaze locked on Morgan, his posture relaxed yet still protective, as though daring anyone to comment further.
Morgan's grin widened, but he knew better than to push his boss too far. He gave you both a knowing nod, eyes twinkling with mischief. "Alright, alright," he said, backing out of the doorway with his hands still raised. "Iā€™ll let you two get back to 'wrapping things up.' Just remember, Hotch, the teamā€™s got eyes everywhere."
As soon as Morgan disappeared, you let out a breath you hadnā€™t realized you were holding, a half-laugh escaping your lips. You turned back to Hotch, who met your gaze with a look that was a mix of exasperation and reluctant amusement.
"Well," you said, shaking your head with a smile, "that went better than expected."
Hotch's lips twitched into a wry smile, the hint of a challenge in his eyes. "You realize this isnā€™t going to go unnoticed by the rest of the team," he said, his tone a little softer now, almost conspiratorial.
"Oh, I know," you replied, your smile turning playful. "But Iā€™m not planning on making it easy for them."
Hotchā€™s gaze held yours for a moment longer, something unspoken passing between youā€”an agreement, a promise, that whatever came next, youā€™d face it together. And with that, the tension in the room shifted once more, the unspoken understanding between you deepening into something neither of you couldā€”or wanted toā€”deny.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The rest of the night passed in a blur of paperwork, debriefings, and quiet conversations as the team began to wind down after the exhausting case. But no matter how much you tried to focus, your mind kept drifting back to what had happened with Hotch in the briefing roomā€”the way his touch had lingered on your waist, the heat in his eyes, and the quiet promise of something more.
You couldn't shake it. Every glance in his direction sent a fresh wave of heat coursing through you, a reminder of the kiss, of the way his lips had moved against yours, demanding and tender all at once. The tension between you hadnā€™t just simmeredā€”it was boiling over, and the thought of leaving it unresolved made your heart race.
As the rest of the team filtered out, leaving the office empty and quiet, you found yourself lingering by your desk, unable to shake the feeling that tonight wasnā€™t over yet. And then, as if on cue, you felt him before you even saw himā€”Hotchā€™s presence filling the room, his footsteps slow and deliberate as he approached.
When you looked up, your breath hitched at the sight of him. His tie was still loosened, the first few buttons of his shirt undone, and his sleeves were rolled up, revealing the bandage on his arm from earlier. There was a slight shadow of exhaustion around his eyes, but it did nothing to dampen the intensity of his gaze.
He didnā€™t say a word as he reached your desk, his eyes never leaving yours, and suddenly the air between you was thick with everything that had been left unsaid.
"Youā€™re still here," he finally said, his voice low and rough, laced with something that made your skin tingle.
"So are you," you replied, trying to keep your voice steady, but the way he was looking at you made it nearly impossible. You swallowed, the tension between you two practically vibrating. "We need to finish this, donā€™t we?"
Hotch didnā€™t hesitate. His lips quirked into the faintest smile as he nodded, the movement slow and deliberate. "I think we do," he said, his voice dropping an octave. His gaze flicked to your lips for just a moment before meeting your eyes again, and you could see the unspoken question in themā€”are you ready for this?
You were.
He stood close, closer than he ever had before, his fingers brushing the back of your hand in a touch that seemed to linger just a little too long. He didnā€™t say anything, but the way his gaze dropped to your lips and then flicked back to your eyes spoke volumes. It was a silent question, one he wasnā€™t quite ready to put into words.
Without thinking, you leaned in, a slow, tentative movement that felt like testing the waters. His breath hitched, and just as your lips barely brushed his, he hesitatedā€”only for a secondā€”before closing the distance, his kiss soft and controlled, as though he was savoring a secret heā€™d kept locked away for too long.
Hotch responded instantly, his good arm snaking around your waist and pulling you flush against him, his lips moving against yours with an intensity that made your head spin. His kiss was demanding, fierce like he was making up for every moment of restraint, every fight, every time heā€™d held back. His hand slid to the back of your neck, holding you to him, deepening the kiss as his tongue grazed your lower lip.
You let out a soft gasp, and he took the opportunity to take control, his tongue slipping past your lips in a way that sent a jolt of heat straight through you. You pressed against him harder, your hands fisting in the fabric of his shirt, desperate to get closer, to feel every inch of him.
He groaned into your mouth, the sound vibrating through your chest, and it was like something inside you snapped. You reached up, running your fingers through his hair, tugging just hard enough to make him pull back, his breath coming in sharp, ragged gasps.
"Careful," he warned, his voice rough and low, his eyes dark with a mixture of desire and control. "Youā€™re playing with fire."
You smirked, your lips brushing against his ear as you whispered, "I thought you liked that."
His grip on your waist tightened, and before you could tease him again, he spun you around, pressing your back against the nearest wall with a swift, fluid movement that left you breathless. His body pinned you there, his chest rising and falling heavily as he stared down at you with an intensity that made your knees weak.
"I do," he murmured, his lips brushing against your jaw as his hand slid beneath your shirt, his fingers skimming over your skin in a way that made your pulse race. "But I donā€™t think you know just how far Iā€™m willing to go."
You shivered under his touch, your breath hitching as his fingers grazed the curve of your waist, his lips tracing a hot path down the side of your neck. "Then show me," you whispered, barely able to form the words as the heat between you both threatened to overwhelm you.
Hotchā€™s lips curled into a wicked smile against your skin, and without another word, he kissed you againā€”harder this time, more demanding, more possessive. His hands explored your body with a hunger that matched your own, sliding beneath the fabric of your shirt, tracing every curve, every dip, until you were arching against him, desperate for more.
You tugged at his shirt, fingers fumbling to unbutton it as you kissed him back with just as much intensity, your heart pounding in your chest as the desire between you grew hotter, more insistent.
"Y/N," he groaned, his breath hot against your lips as you finally managed to push his shirt off his shoulders, your hands exploring the hard lines of his chest, the warmth of his skin beneath your fingers. "God, youā€™re going to drive me crazy."
You smiled against his mouth, tugging him closer. "Good," you breathed, your voice a mix of teasing and need. "Iā€™ve been waiting for this."
He let out a low, rumbling laugh, his hands sliding down your body until they were gripping your hips, holding you tight against him as he kissed you again, harder, deeper. It felt like you were both caught in a storm, a whirlwind of desire that neither of you could control, and you didnā€™t want to.
You didnā€™t know how long the kiss lasted, how many times you lost yourself in the feel of his lips on yours, the heat of his body against yours. All you knew was that it wasnā€™t enoughā€”it would never be enough.
When Hotch finally pulled back, both of you were breathless, your bodies pressed so close together you could feel the rapid beat of his heart against your chest. He stared down at you, his eyes dark and full of desire, but there was something else there tooā€”something deeper, something that went beyond the heat of the moment.
"You have no idea how long Iā€™ve wanted this," he murmured, his voice rough with emotion, his forehead resting against yours as he tried to catch his breath.
You smiled, your fingers tracing lazy patterns on his chest. "I think I do," you whispered, your voice soft, full of affection and heat.
For a moment, neither of you moved, the intensity of what had just happened settling between you like a silent promise. But the fire was still there, simmering just beneath the surface, waiting for the right moment to burn even hotter.
The air in the bullpen was electric, the tension between you and Hotch almost crackling as you both stood there, chests heaving, lips swollen from the kiss youā€™d just shared. The reality of where you were hit you like a bucket of cold water, and you glanced around, grateful that the rest of the team had already gone home.
"Hotch," you said, voice still breathless, a hint of a smile tugging at your lips as you took in the sight of himā€”tie askew, shirt half-unbuttoned, looking thoroughly disheveled in a way youā€™d never seen before. "As much as Iā€™d love to continue thisā€¦ display, Iā€™m pretty sure the FBI frowns upon public displays ofā€”well, whatever this is."
He let out a low chuckle, the sound rumbling from deep in his chest, his hand still resting on your waist, like he wasnā€™t quite ready to let you go. "You make a good point," he said, his lips quirking up into that maddening smirk that drove you insane. "Wouldnā€™t want to scandalize the rest of the team more than we already have."
You raised an eyebrow, giving him a teasing look. "Oh, I donā€™t know," you said, a sly smile spreading across your face. "I think Morganā€™s probably got a running commentary ready for the next team meeting. Maybe we should give him more material."
Hotchā€™s smirk widened, a flash of mischief sparking in his eyes. "You really are trouble, arenā€™t you?" he murmured, his fingers trailing lightly up your arm, leaving a trail of goosebumps in their wake. "I knew it the moment you walked into the BAU."
"You sure thatā€™s what you thought?" you shot back, your voice laced with challenge. "Because Iā€™m pretty sure the first thing you said to me was how I needed to 'fall in line' if I wanted to survive on this team."
Hotch let out a short laugh, the kind that sounded like he was finally letting himself enjoy this. "And youā€™ve been driving me crazy ever since," he said, his voice softer, almost reverent, as his thumb brushed across your cheek. "In the best possible way."
You felt your cheeks flush, but you couldnā€™t help the smile that broke across your face, the one you couldnā€™t hide anymore. "You know," you said, tilting your head slightly, your tone shifting back to playful, "for a man who claims to be the master of control, you really have a habit of losing it around me."
He raised an eyebrow, his smirk turning almost predatory as he leaned in, his lips brushing just shy of your ear. "Oh, I haven't lost control yet," he whispered, his voice a low, dangerous rumble that sent a shiver straight down your spine. "But keep pushing, and I might just have to show you what that really looks like."
Your breath hitched, and you had to fight the urge to pull him back into another kiss right then and there. Instead, you pressed your hand against his chest, pushing him back just slightly, a teasing smile playing on your lips. "Promises, promises, Hotchner," you said with a wink. "But youā€™re rightā€”we should probably get out of here before this turns into an official FBI incident."
He chuckled, shaking his head slightly, but the fire in his eyes never dimmed. "My place or yours?" he asked, the question laced with a hint of playfulness that made your heart skip a beat.
You pretended to think about it for a moment, your lips quirking up into a sly grin. "Yours," you said decisively. "Wouldnā€™t want you thinking Iā€™m too comfortable letting you into my world just yet. Gotta keep you on your toes."
Hotchā€™s eyes sparkled with amusement, his smirk widening into a full grin. "Ah, so weā€™re back to this, are we?" he said, shaking his head as if he couldnā€™t quite believe how much he was enjoying this. "Fine. But donā€™t think this means Iā€™m going to let you win our next argument."
You laughed, the sound coming out light and genuine, surprising even yourself. "Hotch," you said, leaning in close enough that your lips almost brushed his, "you never had a chance of winning. Iā€™ve been three steps ahead of you since day one."
His expression softened, his eyes locking onto yours with that intensity that always made you feel like he was seeing right through you. "And thatā€™s exactly why Iā€™m not letting you out of my sight," he said, his voice rough with honesty. "Youā€™ve already got me hooked."
Your teasing smile faltered for a heartbeat at the sincerity in his voice, and you felt the air between you shiftā€”deepening into something more than just banter, more than the physical pull you couldnā€™t resist. You reached up, cupping his jaw in your hand, and for a moment, you let yourself just look at himā€”this man whoā€™d somehow become everything you never knew you needed.
"You coming or what, Hotchner?" you finally said, pulling back just enough to flash him a challenging smile, the one he loved to see on your face.
He let out a breath, his smile softening into something almost tender. "Oh, Iā€™m coming," he said, taking your hand in his, lacing his fingers with yours as he pulled you toward the elevator. "And donā€™t think for a second that Iā€™m letting you out of my sight."
As the elevator doors closed behind you, the teasing banter between you faded into silence, replaced by a different kind of tensionā€”one that promised tonight was only the beginning of something that neither of you could walk away from now.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The car ride to Hotchā€™s apartment was silent but not the uncomfortable kind. It was the kind of silence that crackled with tension, filled with every word neither of you dared to speak aloud. Every glance he stole in your direction made your pulse quicken; every brush of his hand against yours made your breath hitch just a little. You were both wound tight, like two live wires sparking dangerously close.
When you finally reached his place, Hotch opened the door with a practiced calm, but you could see the fire still simmering just beneath his composed exterior. He let you step inside first, and the second the door clicked shut behind you, something seemed to shift between youā€”a silent understanding that whatever happened next would change everything.
"You know," you said, turning to face him, your voice teasing but your smile almost too genuine, "I never thought Iā€™d end up here, with you, of all people."
Hotch raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth as he took a slow step toward you. "Trust me," he said, his voice low and rough, "I never planned on it either. But somehow, youā€™ve got a way of turning my plans upside down."
You let out a breathless laugh, the kind that felt like a release of all the pent-up tension between you. "I guess I have a knack for getting under your skin, huh?" you teased, taking a step closer to him, so close now that you could feel the heat radiating off his body.
"Under my skin?" Hotch murmured, his gaze darkening as he reached out, his hand cupping your cheek with a tenderness that made your heart skip a beat. "Youā€™ve done a lot more than that."
He leaned in, his lips just a breath away from yours, the anticipation almost unbearable. But before he could close the distance, you pulled back slightly, a mischievous smile playing on your lips.
"Easy there, Hotchner," you said, a teasing lilt in your voice. "Are you sure you can handle this? I wouldnā€™t want you to lose control on me now."
He let out a low chuckle, shaking his head, and in one swift movement, he had you pinned against the wall, his hands on either side of your head, caging you in. His face was so close to yours that you could feel his breath against your lips, warm and teasing. "Oh, Iā€™m more than ready," he said, his voice dropping to a dangerous whisper, "but donā€™t think for a second that Iā€™m letting you call the shots tonight."
Before you could muster a retort, his lips crashed onto yours, the kiss fierce and consuming, a raw release of everything youā€™d both been holding back. This wasnā€™t the careful, testing kiss from beforeā€”this was a battle of wills, a clash of all the fire and passion that had been building between you for so long.
You responded just as fiercely, your hands fisting in the fabric of his shirt as you pulled him closer, your mouth opening under his, desperate to taste every inch of him. His hands slid to your hips, gripping tight as he pressed his body against yours, pinning you to the wall in a way that left no space between you.
You pulled back just enough to catch your breath, your lips brushing against his as you whispered, "Come on, Hotchner, thatā€™s the best you can do? I thought youā€™d at least make me work for it."
His eyes flashed with something wild and hungry, a grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Oh, sweetheart," he murmured, voice rough like gravel, "Iā€™m just getting started."
Without another word, he scooped you up in his arms, his grip firm yet gentle, and carried you through the hallway, his lips never straying far from yours. He kicked open the door to his bedroom, the darkness of the room swallowed up by the heat between you two. He set you down on the bed with a deliberate slowness, his eyes drinking you in like he was memorizing every detail.
"You have no idea how much youā€™ve messed with my head," he said, his voice a mix of frustration and longing as he leaned over you, his fingers brushing a stray lock of hair from your face. "How many nights Iā€™ve spent wanting you, hating you for making me feel this way."
You reached up, cupping his face in your hands, your thumb tracing the line of his jaw. "Believe me," you said softly, all the teasing gone from your voice, "I know exactly how you feel."
Hotch's expression shifted then, something raw and unguarded flickering in his eyes, and he crashed his lips onto yours again, this time with a desperation that bordered on reverence. He kissed you like he was pouring all his unspoken words into itā€”all the frustration, the longing, the need that heā€™d kept buried for so long.
You tugged at his shirt, pulling it off him in one swift motion, and his hands followed suit, sliding under your top, lifting it over your head with a quick, impatient motion. His fingers traced the bare skin of your waist, sending shivers down your spine as he drank in the sight of you like he was seeing something heā€™d been waiting for his entire life.
"You make this harder than it needs to be," he said, his voice a rough whisper against your lips, his hands caressing your skin with a touch that was both tender and possessive. "But I wouldnā€™t have it any other way."
"Good," you murmured, your lips brushing his as you smiled, that fiery spark still dancing in your eyes. "Because Iā€™m not done driving you crazy yet."
His answering laugh was low and rough, a sound that made your toes curl. "Bring it on," he growled, his mouth crashing onto yours once more, claiming you with a kiss that left no room for doubt, no space for second-guessing.
This wasnā€™t just a moment. This was everythingā€”the culmination of all the fights, the banter, the fire you had both sparked from the beginning. The dance had finally peaked, and you knew there was no going back now.
As he pulled you closer, his hands mapping every inch of your body with a hunger that matched your own, you realized that you didnā€™t want to go back. Not to the arguments, not to the distance, not to the days of pretending this wasnā€™t inevitable.
Whatever this wasā€”this fire, this madness, this undeniable connectionā€”you were both all in, ready to let it burn as bright and as hot as it needed to.
And as his lips moved over yours, the night stretching out ahead of you, one thought echoed in your mind with a clarity that was impossible to ignore: This was only the beginning.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
The first light of dawn crept through the blinds of Hotchā€™s bedroom, casting soft shadows across the room. You blinked awake, a lazy smile spreading across your face as the events of the night slowly came rushing backā€”how it had started with teasing banter and ended with the two of you tangled together in ways that left no room for ambiguity.
You turned your head slightly to see Hotch lying next to you; his face softened in sleep, a look of peacefulness that you rarely saw on him. The lines of stress and worry that usually creased his brow were smoothed out, his breathing even and slow. At this moment, he looked almost boyish, vulnerable in a way that made your heart squeeze just a little.
Careful not to wake him, you let yourself watch him for a moment longer, taking in this rare sight of Aaron Hotchnerā€”not the stoic leader of the BAU, not your sparring partner in the bullpen, but just a man whoā€™d let his walls down for you.
Just then, Hotchā€™s eyes fluttered open, and the soft sleepiness was quickly replaced by that intense gaze that never failed to set your pulse racing. He gave you a small, almost shy smileā€”a look you hadnā€™t seen on him before and one that did dangerous things to your heart.
"Morning," he said, his voice low and rough from sleep, the sound sending a pleasant shiver down your spine. His hand reached out, brushing a strand of hair from your face, his touch gentle, almost reverent.
"Morning," you replied, unable to keep the smile from your face as you met his gaze. "So, about last nightā€¦"
A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips, and he raised an eyebrow in that infuriatingly charming way of his. "You mean the part where you practically tackled me against the wall or the part where you admitted youā€™ve been three steps ahead of me this whole time?"
You let out a breathy laugh, rolling your eyes playfully. "Oh, please," you said, leaning in slightly. "If I recall correctly, you were the one who said you were 'just getting started,' Hotchner."
He chuckled, a low, rumbling sound that made your stomach flip. "TouchĆ©," he said, his fingers lightly tracing circles on your bare shoulder. "But I have to say, if this is what happens when we stop fighting, Iā€™m not sure I want to go back."
You paused, the teasing smile fading slightly as you looked at him, something softer, more vulnerable settling in your chest. "Youā€™re really okay with this?" you asked, your voice quieter now, the question carrying more weight than you intended.
Hotchā€™s expression shifted, the playfulness giving way to something deeper, something that spoke of sincerity and warmth. He reached out, taking your hand in his, his thumb brushing gently over your knuckles. "More than okay," he said softly, his eyes locked on yours. "I know this changes everything, and that scares me a littleā€”but not as much as the thought of pretending this didnā€™t mean something."
You opened your mouth to respond, but he stopped you with a gentle press of his lips against yoursā€”a kiss that was so different from the ones last night. It was soft, slow, like he was savoring the taste of something heā€™d finally allowed himself to have.
When he pulled back, you gave him a lopsided smile, your voice teasing but with a hint of tenderness. "You know, for a guy who spent so much time trying to get me to fall in line, youā€™re awfully good at breaking your own rules."
Hotch let out a breathy laugh, shaking his head. "Maybe Iā€™ve always been a little too good at breaking them when it comes to you," he said, a hint of that old mischief dancing in his eyes. "Besides, itā€™s only fairā€”youā€™ve been breaking down my walls from the start."
You arched an eyebrow, smirking at him. "Who knew all it took to get through to the great Aaron Hotchner was a little bit of sass and a lot of stubbornness?"
"Trust me," he said, his smile turning soft, almost shy again, "itā€™s more than just the sass and stubbornness. Youā€™ve always had a way of seeing through the tough exterior, straight to the heart of it all. Even when I didnā€™t want you to."
The sincerity in his words made your heart skip a beat, and for once, you found yourself speechless. You stared at him, the man who had always seemed so distant, so unreachable, now lying here beside you with his guard completely down.
"You know," you said finally, your voice barely more than a whisper, "I didnā€™t expect this to happen."
"Neither did I," Hotch admitted, his hand tightening around yours, "but Iā€™m not sorry it did."
You let out a soft laugh, shaking your head in disbelief. "Iā€™m not sure how weā€™re going to explain this to the team. You know theyā€™ll never let us live it down."
A slow, wicked smile spread across his face. "Oh, Iā€™m counting on it," he said, leaning in closer until his lips were just a breath away from yours. "Besides, Iā€™m pretty sure they already have us pegged as the bickering married couple of the team. This will just confirm their suspicions."
You rolled your eyes, but you couldnā€™t help the smile that crept onto your face. "Oh great, so now weā€™re giving them material for years to come. Just what I needed."
Hotch chuckled, his lips brushing yours in a kiss that was playful and sweet yet still carrying that hint of fire that never seemed to go away. "Well, if weā€™re going to give them something to talk about," he murmured against your lips, "we might as well make it worth their while."
You raised an eyebrow, your smile turning into a smirk as you gave him a light shove. "Youā€™re impossible, you know that?"
He grinned, pulling you back into his arms, his voice a low whisper against your ear. "And you wouldnā€™t have it any other way."
You realized he was right. You wouldnā€™t have it any other way. The fire, the fights, the laughterā€”it was all a part of what had led you here, to this moment, to him.
And as the morning light continued to filter through the window, warming the room, you knew that whatever happened next, you and Hotch were in it together.
And that was more than enough.
āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦ . 怀āŗ 怀 . āœ¦
Walking into the BAU the next morning felt differentā€”like the air itself had changed. As you and Hotch stepped into the bullpen, you couldnā€™t help the way your shoulders brushed, the way his gaze lingered on you just a moment longer than usual. The two of you had agreed to keep things professional, at least while on the job, but there was an undeniable shift between youā€”like a secret that wasnā€™t much of a secret at all.
As you both moved to your respective desks, trying your best to look like everything was perfectly normal, you were acutely aware of the way the team's eyes tracked your every move. Morgan and JJ were huddled near the coffee station, grinning like they were in on the worldā€™s biggest joke, while Garciaā€™s jaw practically hit the floor the second she spotted you two.
"Well, well, well," Morgan said, straightening up with a grin so wide it looked like it might split his face in two. "If it isnā€™t the lovebirds gracing us with their presence. How was the night, you two?"
You rolled your eyes, a hint of a smirk tugging at your lips. "Please," you said with a dismissive wave of your hand, "you act like this is something new. Weā€™ve been driving each other crazy for months."
"Oh, trust me, we noticed," JJ chimed in, her grin just as wide as Morganā€™s. "But judging by the way you two walked in this morning, Iā€™m guessing the banter took aā€¦ different turn last night?"
Hotch, ever the picture of composure, adjusted his tie as if this was just another day at the office. "Iā€™m not sure what youā€™re implying, JJ," he said in that calm, collected tone of his, though you could see the hint of a smile tugging at his lips.
"Oh, come on, Hotch," Garcia said, practically bouncing on her toes with excitement. "So, anything new happening here that we should know about?
"Remind me to never play poker with any of you," you said dryly, raising an eyebrow at the lot of them. "You canā€™t hide anything."
Morgan leaned against his desk, crossing his arms with a knowing smirk. "And here I thought the toughest thing to crack in this office was the newest unsub," he said, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Turns out, it was the two of you."
Hotch offered a small, controlled smile, giving Morgan a pointed look but saying nothing, his silence more telling than any words.
"Exactly," you said, turning to Hotch with a grin. "Might as well own up to the fact that Iā€™ve been right all along, and youā€™ve been falling behind since day one."
"Oh, is that how you remember it?" Hotch replied, raising an eyebrow in challenge. "I seem to recall you being the one who couldnā€™t keep up."
You felt a laugh bubbling up, the banter between you as natural as ever, but now it was tinged with something lighter, something softer. "Keep telling yourself that, Hotchner," you said, crossing your arms with a teasing smile. "We both know Iā€™m the one whoā€™s three steps ahead."
Morgan let out a loud laugh, shaking his head. "Oh, this is going to be fun to watch," he said. "You two are never going to stop, are you?"
Hotch gave Morgan a look that was both calm and controlled, but there was a slight softening at the corner of his mouth, a hint of a smile that only you would recognize. "Let's try to keep it professional," he said in his usual authoritative tone, though you could see the glimmer of amusement hidden in his eyes.
You couldnā€™t help but smirk at his response, the challenge still present between you even if he wasnā€™t openly saying it. "Of course, Hotch," you said with a touch of mock seriousness. "I wouldnā€™t dream of making things too easy for you."
Hotchā€™s lips twitched ever so slightly, almost imperceptibly, as he turned back to his desk, his expression as unreadable as ever to the rest of the team. But in that brief glance, you saw itā€”the silent promise, the unspoken words that lingered between you: this is far from over.
The rest of the team exchanged amused glances, their smiles wide and knowing. It was clear that this was the moment theyā€™d all been waiting for, the confirmation of what theyā€™d suspected for far too long.
As the team gradually settled back into their usual routine, you felt Hotchā€™s hand brush lightly against yours, a subtle touch that sent a thrill through you. You turned to look at him, and he gave you a small, private smileā€”a look that was meant only for you.
"Think you can handle the rest of the day without causing too much trouble?" he asked, his tone teasing but his eyes warm.
"I donā€™t know," you said, leaning in just a little closer, your voice a soft whisper only he could hear. "Trouble seems to be the one thing Iā€™m really good at."
Hotchā€™s smile widened, and he shook his head slightly, a glimmer of affection in his eyes. "Good," he said softly. "Because I have a feeling weā€™re just getting started."
And as the day carried on, with the team throwing you both teasing looks and sly smiles, you knew that things were never going to be the same again. The banter, the fire, the argumentsā€”they were still there, but now they were wrapped in something new, something deeper.
And this time, you were both all in, ready to face whatever came next together.
The worst-kept secret in the BAU was out, and you wouldnā€™t have it any other way.
Tag List:
@zaddyhotch @estragos @todorokishoe24 @khxna @rousethemouse
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sanguineterrain Ā· 5 months ago
Note
I am FERAL over your knight Jason thought. FERAL!!! Okay check this out: so Jason's ignoring reader because he feels guilty right? Maybe he tried to give them back but the king wouldn't allow it. But maybe the reader misunderstands and thinks they're not doing their "duties" so they make dinner and breakfast and wash his clothes and basically act like a perfect spouse. How would Jason react? šŸ‘€
Dear god... I feel another series coming on...
Idkidk, their dynamic is just really interesting to me! it's probably gonna be a bit of a slow burn here. Feel free to send more thoughts about them. I am rotating these two like a rotisserie chicken in my brain.
knight!jason todd x gn!reader. ambiguous time period but just assume it's olden times *gestures vaguely*. tw arranged marriage/forced relationship but it's complicated! jason is full of angst and self-loathing but he's a sweetie as per usual. original post for context.
****
The soldierā€”Jasonā€”has said four words since you've arrived.
The first was "here," which he said whilst handing you a mug of milk. He didn't look at you as he said it, and that morning, he left for a five-day long station. You only know that because he said, after handing you the milk, "I've been stationed."
You realized it was five days when you heard his horse galloping towards the house... five days later.
You haven't initiated conversation because though you're a commoner, and no one ever had much hope for you to become anything but an old spinster, you know not to challenge knights.
But this is fucking ridiculous.
"Do you like veal?" you ask on your fourteenth day here.
Jason is about to leave, his boots half laced. He freezes at your question and looks up.
You stand tall, chin up. This is a normal question. A question a wife would ask her husband, except you're not a wife, and you're pretty sure this soldier isn't a husband either.
"I like veal," he says carefully, slowly. "Would you like me to fetch some from the market?"
Now, this is where it gets tricky. When the king summoned you, he made it clear that you were expected to care for Jason under his rules. You don't know how to navigate this world. You know what couples in your village do, but you don't know what's expected of you here.
"Actually, I..." Jason looks at you. His eyes are very green. He has a surprisingly sweet face under his helmet. "Actually, I was wondering if I could go. On my own."
"Oh."
You brace yourself for arguing or yelling. True, he hasn't raised his voice once, but he also hasn't said much at all. It's like living with a ghost.
"Yes, of course. Of course you can go." He fishes out a pouch of coins and gives them to you. You take it slowly, waiting for him to realize his mistake. He doesn't.
"Thank you," you say.
He nods and watches you walk.
"Wait."
You stop. Here it comes.
"There's a cargo ship in port today. The guards rotate at noon."
He leaves before you can form a thought. You hold the coins, watching blankly as the door shuts behind him. His horse whinnies, and then he's gone.
The market isn't far from the cottage. It's fantastic to be outside again. No one's noticed your absence, clearly, but that's alright. You've never expected more.
You buy a good cut of veal and potatoes and carrots and apples. Jason gave you more money than any cut of meat would cost, so surely he assumed you would buy other food. Why else would he give you so much?
A ship's horn drones in the distance. You're feeling some oranges when you remember his words. A cargo ship.
The sun is almost at its highest point.
"Oi! Either buy 'em or stop feelin' 'em!" the seller snaps.
You roll your eyes and move on from the orange stand. You can see the horizon of where the sky meets the sea from here. Any moment, the guards will change, and the ship will be...
You stop. Was Jason hinting at your escape?
No, he couldn't have been! That's preposterous. Why would he want you gone? The king took you for a reason.
And where would you go anyway? Once you leave, you'd be a criminal forever. You couldn't make a home on your own. And who knows what could happen in between? Pirates, enemy soldiers, anybody could snatch you up.
This must've been a test. A test to see if you would run. That's why he agreed to you going so easily.
No, your escape can't be planned now. Not when you're so obviously uncomfortable, and Jason knows it.
You ignore the ship and go home with your purchases. You spend the rest of the afternoon preparing veal stew. You warm leftover bread over the fire and set a pot of butter on the table.
Jason comes in louder than he has before, humming quietly. You perk up at the sound, happy for the lack of silence.
You set a bowl of stew at his chair and wait by the fire. As soon as he enters the kitchen, the humming stops.
"Welcome home," you say, wringing your hands. "I made supper."
Jason glances at the table, then back at you.
"You came back," he says.
"Why wouldn't I?" you ask, face neutral as you cut the bread into chunks.
"Thatā€”did the ship come?"
"Yes."
Jason sits. His face is dirty from training.
"I bought more than veal," you say, and hand him the pouch. "I hope that's alright. Weā€”there were no more potatoes."
He takes the pouch, rubbing the string tied around the top. "You went to the marketplace... and came back."
It's not a question, but it sounds like there might be one behind it.
"Certainly," you say. "I'm loyal to you, Jason. I serve you."
He looks up, blinking rapidly. Then he looks back at his stew.
Oh, right. He's waiting for you to ask permission to sit.
"May I join you?" you ask.
Jason flinches. "You don't... you don't have to ask. I would never stop you from eating."
The words hang in the air. It's like neither one of you can speak right.
You watch him, and he watches you as you serve yourself and sit on the opposite side of the table. Jason takes the first bite, and you eat right after.
"Is the supper satisfactory? Have I done well?" you ask.
Jason stops chewing and sets his spoon down. You're struck by his shift in demeanor. You worry for a moment you've screwed up something as dim-wittingly simple as stew.
His eyes are sad as they fall on you. It's akin to grief, the pain he wears, but you don't know why he's grieving. You silently offer him more bread, pushing it toward him. He takes it.
"Yes," he says quietly and eats another spoonful. "You did. Thank you for supper."
Jason cleans his bowl three times. You have no stew leftover, which pleases you.
But as soon as Jason finishes eating, he gets up, rinses his bowl, and wordlessly leaves.
You don't see him for the rest of the night.
Somehow, you feel lonelier than when you weren't speaking.
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changbunnies Ā· 5 months ago
Text
Slow Bloom (18+)
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ā™” Pairing: Inexperienced!Changbin x Experienced Fem!Reader
ā™” Genre: fluff and smut with a lil plot <3 a tiny bit of angst during the build up but it doesn't last long at all!
ā™” Word Count:Ā 8.5k
ā™” Summary:Ā In which a misunderstanding while cuddling leads to discovering exactly how Changbin feels about you.
ā™” Smut Warnings: not intended to have overt dom/sub dynamics but i may have written bin a bit subby lol oops, references to porn watching, kinda pervy bin?, his lack of experience is not outright stated to the reader as it is implied that they already know, nipple play, thigh grinding / humping, fingering (f rec), protected piv
ā™” Notes: so quite a few ppl showed interest in an inexperienced binnie fic after i posted my inexperienced chan fic and i am here to deliver <3 this was also the perfect break from the longer, more plot heavy fics i've been working on as this took a lot less mental effort :') i hope you enjoy this while waiting for those!
ā™” Disclaimer: please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people.
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There aren't many things in life that make Changbin nervous.Ā 
He navigates the world with security and confidence, sure of himself and in the actions he takes. He can speak in tense or awkward situations with relative ease, nerves never eat him up in social settings, and he's never afraid to speak his mind or do what he wishes to.Ā 
But then there's you. You, while laying in bed next to him with an arm draped over his body and one of your legs tucked between his, make him extremely, effortlessly nervous.
It wasn't always this way; at least, not as far as he can remember. You've been friends since forever, and closeness such as this is par for the course. He's used to impromptu sleepovers, to you making yourself comfy in his space, tossing your belongings to the floor without a care before you take over his bed.Ā 
He's used to cuddling while watching tv, to squeezing each other into tight hugs, to limbs tangled under blankets. He's used to the lingering smell of your shampoo mixed with perfume, used to the feeling of your breath tickling his skin when you pull him close, to the feeling of your soft skin beneath his fingertips.Ā 
He's used to it, and it doesn't affect him; or so he thought.
Somewhere along the line, something within him shifted. Whether the reason lies with you or with himself, he doesn't entirely know. What heĀ does know is that he no longer sees you the same way he did when you were growing up together. And it wasn't until that shift occurred that he realized maybe "your friend" isn't the only thing he wants to be.Ā 
Maybe it's a natural, gradual progression from where you both began, a shift in desire brought on by new maturity and life experience. Maybe you've been this radiant and beautiful since the very first day you met, but he was too young and oblivious to realize it then.Ā 
Maybe it's because of that strange, sharp and twisting feeling in his gut every time he sees you with a new partner. If it wasn't for you showing interest in other people, would he have ever realized at all that what he feels for you transcends what he feels in his other friendships?Ā 
While he loves his other friends, he doesn't get jealous when they bring a new partner around, or talk about their love life to him. He doesn't spend every night lying awake thinking about them, nor does he wonder what it'd be like to kiss them. He doesn't dream about seeing their bare skin, or about touching them, about them touching him.
He doesn't imagine their tongue lavishing over him, or of returning the favor to them. He doesn't fantasize about them in dirty, naughty scenarios, during his private moments in bed or in the shower. You occupy his every thought, to the point that even while watching porn he has to close his eyes and imagine it's you making those sounds instead, replacing the scene before him with a mental image of you and him together.Ā 
That's what makes Changbin especially nervous right now. You're cuddled up to him, as you always are when you spend the night at his place, but he can't get his brain toĀ please shut the fuck up and stop pushing him to the brink of embarrassing himself.Ā 
He needs to stop thinking about the placement of your hand on his stomach, just above his waistband. He can't linger on the fact that your tits are pressed against him while you hug him, or about how pleasant the soft, content sighs that leave you sound to his ears.
If he thinks about any of it, he'll get hardā€“ and that'll easily be the most mortifying moment of his life, because you wouldĀ definitely notice with the way your leg is snaked between his and resting between his thighs. It's moments like this when he misses the days of innocenceā€“ when cuddling with you like this didn't feel quite so intimate.
He makes a conscious effort to focus harder on the tv in front of you both, playing some sitcom he has long since stopped paying attention to. He guesses the jokes are landing if your occasional giggles are any sign, but if you asked his opinion on anything going on he wouldn't be able to answer. Changbin has never been the type of person who was easily able to divide his attention, but God, does he fucking try.
Because if you realize he's getting hard, and you feel it, there are very few scenarios he can imagine where you're okay with it. And if you decide to question him on it, he'd be done forā€“ because there's no way he'd be able to outright deny his attraction to you. Playing it off would feel too much like lying, and this is not the kind of scenario he imagines when he thinks about the way he'll admit his feelings to you.
You've noticed since the beginning that his body has been tense; you've been cuddling since you were young, and you're more than familiar with how he feels when he's relaxed. It's almost amazing how someone so muscular can still feel so soft when their body is at restā€“ and right now you can't help but notice that he feels very far from soft.Ā 
You tried to ignore it and focus on the show you're watching, and it worked for some time, but the longer he stays tense the more you can't help but wonder if you've been bothering him lately. It's become a growing patternā€“ you touch Changbin, in some ways small and menial like a passing tap to his arm as you slip past him in the kitchen, or large, in which you hug him tight and envelop him with your entire body.
Either way, the reaction is the same; he instantly tenses. You're not sure if he intends to do so, or if it's an unconscious reaction he doesn't even realize he's doing, but it hasn't gone unnoticed by you.Ā The two of you have always been a match when it comes to being clingy and affectionate, but maybe that isn't the kind of attention he wants to get from you anymore.Ā 
Are you being overbearing? Did you unintentionally do something wrong? Maybe he wants to distance himself from you but is just either too nice or too scared to say it out loud and hurt your feelings.Ā 
When you tilt your head to look at him, his cheeks are pinker than they were just moments ago, with his gaze fixed solely on the tv. You're sure he can feel you looking at him, but he doesn't turn his head to meet your eyes. You want to believe he's justĀ really engrossed in the show, but you can't help but doubt it. YouĀ know him, and you're certain that for whatever reason, he's avoiding your gaze.Ā 
"Am I bothering you?" you ask abruptly, and perhaps a bit more vulnerable than you would've liked. Not that you can help it, really; you just really care about Changbin, and you can't stand not knowing if you've done something to upset him or make him want to separate himself from you. YouĀ have to know, because you can't stand it any longer.Ā 
"What? No, Iā€“Ā what?" Changbin finally looks at you, furrowed brows peeking out between strands of his long, messy curls. You didn't expect him to be so surprised by your question; admittedly, it is sudden, but this has been building for weeks hasn't it? You thought he'd be relieved that you're bringing it up first so that he doesn't have to.
You've never been happier to be wrong, or to see such genuine confusion on his face.Ā Thank God.Ā "Sorry, I just.. You've been acting different lately, and I thought that maybe it was because I did something wrong," you explain, following it with a small, awkward laugh.
Really, you're relieved; at the same time however, you do feel a bit embarrassed and silly to have been questioning what's been happening with him now that he's so clearly taken aback. You jumped to conclusions and got a bit ahead of yourself, itā€™s trueā€“ but.. If thatā€™s not it, then what is it?
Surely thereā€™s a reasonā€“ his behavior wouldnā€™t have changed if everything is really the same as it's always been. If nothing's wrong, why does he tense up every time you try to act affectionate with him? Why does he hesitate to meet your gaze when he never had a problem doing so before? Why does it always feel like he's putting distance between you?Ā 
Changbin swallows, you noticeā€“ a nervous response that you guess is from putting him on the spot. Because if it's not what you've been thinking, you need to be provided with another explanationā€“ an explanation that only he can offer you. He needs to clear up this misunderstanding if he doesn't want you to wrongfully think you've done wrong by him, but what can he say that also omits the truth he isn't ready to admit?Ā 
His cheeks grow pinker, and you can tell he's struggling to find wordsā€“ something you'd typically never expect to see in your charismatic best friend. You've untangled yourself from him enough to lift yourself up, weight propped up by your elbow while you look directly in his eyes. He's slightly beneath you at this angle, eyes having to travel up to meet your own, and again he swallows.Ā 
He's so fucked. There's nothing he can say right now other thanĀ "I really fucking like you and being this close to you all the time is making me crazy."
But he can'tĀ actually say that. Changbin wants his confession to come with a grand, romantic gesture. He wants to say the sweetest, more perfect words he can come up with. He wants to be a man of action, someone as cool as they are sincere, someone who can make you swoon with suave, but genuine effort. Admitting his feelings to you now, like this, would be the furthest thing from charming, or cool, or perfect.Ā 
As if all of that wasn't enough, now he has to make a conscious effort to not let his eyes wander down to look at your chestā€“ because he's been chubbing up since the moment you started cuddling, and if he catches a glimpse of your cleavage now, he's done for. It feels vaguely pathetic to be this affected by you when you don't even realize you're doing it to him.Ā 
Changbin's eyes act against the purposeful efforts of his brain and travel to your chest, met overtly with the sight of your breasts pressed together. Fuck. He looks back up to your face quickly, hoping you haven't noticed where his eyes wandered. He wishes he could reach between your bodies and discreetly adjust his pants to hide his growing erection, but he can't, andĀ God help him, you're going to notice any second now.Ā 
And you're looking at him so sweetly and earnestly, patient and caring, totally unaware of what you're doing to him and what his actual struggle is. He wants to clear everything up, doesn't want you to feel like the fault of what he's going through lies with you, he wants to answer every question you have, he really doesā€“ but he's found himself in a vicious cycle.Ā 
Trying not to think about the position you're both in, of how pretty you are looking down at him, or of your chest that he can't seem to ignore despite how badly he needs to focus onĀ anythingĀ else just makes him dwell on it even more. The more he tries not to, the more space it takes up in his mind, until it's entirely clouded, preventing him from conjuring a thought worthy of being spoken to you.Ā 
Fuck thinking of an excuse or explanation, he can't think of anything other than your tits being so close to his face. He wants nothing more than to kiss them, to feel your fingers running through his hair as he sticks his tongue out to lick your nipples, has thought about squeezing them between his palmsĀ soĀ many times.Ā 
So can he offer you a reasonable enough excuse that hides the truth of the matter? Absolutely fucking notā€“ not when all he can think about is how you'd feel and taste. "Changbin?" your questioning voice snaps him out of it, looking up at you like a deer caught in headlights behind his thick rimmed glasses.Ā 
He looks guilty, face entirely flushed red all the way to the tips of his ears. And you're convinced now that heĀ was trying to spare your feelings, and was stuck on finding the right way to break it to you. He didn't know what to say, and was trying so desperately to think of something that wouldn't crush you.
He can see the hurt wash over you, and he opens his mouth, ready to blurt out anything in a futile attempt at damage control, but you're already speaking before he even gets the chance to try. "You don't have to spare my feelings, you can be honest, just tell meā€“" you say as you start to push yourself away from him, very clearly misunderstanding the situation that's been unfolding.Ā 
Before he can even begin to figure out if he should be relieved or devastated by your incorrect assumptions hiding what he feels, the process of moving your leg from between his causes him to let out a gasp that takes you both by surprise. You feel itā€“ his semi-hard erection brushes against your leg as you attempt to move it out from between his thighs.Ā 
"Oh," is suddenly all you can manage to say. Is Changbin attracted to you..? Is that why for months he's slowly but surely become so different in your presence? When you look back to him, he's covered his face with his hands over his glasses, his pouty bottom lip quivering in what you can only assume to be mortification over his body betraying him.Ā 
The question now is, is this simply a physical reaction to being close or something more than that? Would it happen to him no matter who was pressed against him, or is it you in particular that causes his body to react this way? You won't know until he tells you, but you hope more than anything he wants you as much as you've always wanted him.
The idea that he may view you romantically is not something you ever allowed yourself to consider a possibility, butĀ oh, how you've wanted it. Changbin has always been perfect to you; a gentleman in all aspects, attentive, considerate, thoughtful, your very best friend. You always thought you'd be lucky if someone like him were to love you, and you always held your partners to the standard he showed you.Ā 
You thought that even if you couldn't have Changbin, you could at least have someone like him; and while no one ever made you feel the way he does, disappointing you in one way or another, you still tried. Perhaps it was unfair, as no one can compare to Changbin, but if he wants you then you'll take him in a heartbeat, no questions asked. Even when it wasn't entirely conscious to you, your heart has always belonged to him.Ā 
He flinches when you call his name again; your tone is soft, but he's still afraid to meet your gaze and discover what kind of expression is on your face. He thinks he'll die if he sees anything even remotely resembling disgust or anger. He cares about youĀ so much, and he wouldn't be able to live with himself if you lost your trust in him because of this.Ā 
You reach for his hands, and despite his nerves threatening to eat him alive for perhaps the first time in his life, he lets you take his hands away from his face. The apprehension in his eyes is clear, though there's a flash of relief when he can see that you're not upset with him. "I'm sorry, really," he blurts out quickly, feeling like he should apologize even if you aren't going to chastise him for getting hard simply from being close to you.Ā 
ā€œDoes this happen a lot when we..?ā€ you ask, watching as his blush spreads down his neck while he hesitantly nods. Youā€™ve never seen him so red and shy beforeā€“ and honestly, you like it. Youā€™ve always considered Changbin to be cute, but this is cute on an entirely different level; you hope this wonā€™t be the only time you get to see him this way. But before that can happen, you have a more pressing question to ask him.
"Do you want me to help you?" is the next question to leave you, and fucking hell, does that send him reeling. He canā€™t believe this is really happening, that youā€™re even asking him so casually. And while it isnā€™t the way he pictured something happening between you after his many months of pining, he could never say no to youā€“ he's been obsessively thinking about you all this time, how could he say anything but yes?
Still, he hesitates regardless; not because he's unsure about continuing, or because he doesn't want to, but because what if it means different things for the two of you? For Changbin, it'd be everything. You're the only person he's ever liked this much, he might even be in love with you, and he doesn't think he'd be able to recover from having a casual fling with you. He'd never be able to go back to before and pretend he doesn't feel as much for you as he does.
"If you say no, we can pretend this never happened," you assure him when you see the nervous hesitance in his eyes. It's not what you'd want to hear, but he deserves to be offered an out if he needs it; because as much as you want him, you don't want him to feel stuck and uncomfortable. And then you continue, hoping more than anything that he shares the sentiment of your next words, "But I think you should know, I really like you, Binnie. And I'll be really happy if you say yes."Ā 
With your admission, all his doubts and fears are cleared in an instant. Really, that's all he needed to hear to be sure what he plans to say next is the right thing to say to you. It's not how he ever intended to ask you this question, but heā€™d never dream of passing up the opportunity presented to himā€“ the opportunity to be yours, and for you to be his in turn. "If I say yes, will you be my girlfriend?"
Heā€™s smiling, sweet and cute as he asks, and it makes you smile tooā€“ because this is much more like the Changbin you know and love. He giggles when you accept, and as the word "boyfriend" leaves you in reference to him, absolutely giddy to finally be yours. Maybe this is better than the way he always pictured it would happen; because this is more organically you, what is more natural to your dynamic and the care you have for each other.
Leaning down, you softly press your lips to his, and even just a gesture so small is enough to spread goosebumps over his skin. It's so soft, slow, every sensation lingering even as you pull away to take a breath before kissing him again. No kiss he's ever had before compares to how it feels to kiss you; he doesn't think he's ever felt as positively electric as he does right now.
Is it normal for every touch of your lips to make him tremble so much? And his heart is already beating so fast, thumping loudly against his chest with each additional kiss and tracing touch of your fingers over his body. Down his arms, over his chest, underneath his shirt and across his stomachā€“ all of it adds to the sparks in his veins.Ā 
His hands explore you tooā€“ eager, and a bit clumsy, but you find his enthusiasm infectious. He's so perfectly warm and soft, and you can't resist the urge to squeeze him in your handsā€“ his soft tummy, his love handles, his defined pecs; you squeeze everywhere your hands can reach. Changbin lets out a soft, surprised squeak the first time, but he quickly grows used to it, and finds himself mimicking the way you touch him.Ā 
He starts with the leg not tucked between his thighs, hand trailing up and down the length of it before he squeezes. Then he moves on to your hips before traveling to your backside, then your waist, and finally your breasts. Even just feeling them over your clothes excites him beyond words, eager and happy to be touching you like he's dreamed of so many times before.
He likes the pleased hums and sighs you let out almost more than he likes the act of squeezing you in his palms, each sound just as pretty and soft as you are. He shivers when he feels your tongue swipe across his bottom lip, and he eagerly parts his lips for you. Your tongue slipping inside his mouth and swirling around his own makes him practically vibrate with desire for more.
Changbin follows you when you start to pull away from the kiss, eyes remaining closed for several seconds before he finally opens them to look at you. His pretty lips, still wet and parted, turn into a pout when you've gone further than he can still reach. His pout vanishes, however, when you start to pull up your shirt, and it makes you giggle; he really is just so cute.Ā 
You weren't wearing a bra beneath your shirtā€“ you never do when you're relaxing before going to bed, even at Changbin's place. You always felt comfortable enough around him that you didn't feel like you had to sacrifice your comfort during your sleepovers, assured in the fact that he'd always be respectful towards you even if he happened to notice.
And while you're comfortable and confident, there's still a certain tinge of nervousness that bubbles up in the back of your mind that comes from being exposed to his eyes now. Tits are prettyā€“ doesn't matter who they're on, or what shape they're in, they always look good; but it's almost funny how simply showing them to the person you like so much makes you nervous regardless of this fact.
You're not ashamed to say you've slept with a lot of people, and that a majority of said people have seen you completely bareā€“ but there's none you've ever liked quite as much or in the same way that you like Changbin. It makes it more intimate somehow, so real, and you suppose that's the part that makes you nervous.
But oh, how his gaze fills your stomach with butterfliesā€“ because you don't think anyone's ever looked at you the way he is right now, with eyes sparkling in awe as he takes the sight of you in. He looks at you with pure wonder and adoration, in a way that is as sweet as it is full of lust and desire.
In his eyes, you may as well be one of the 7 wonders of the worldā€“ something worthy of reverence and worship. He'd do it if you'd let himā€“ worship you until the sky itself falls and everything around the two of you crumbles. He'll show you in any way he can, with every kiss and every touch, that you always have been and always will be the only one for him.
"Canā€“ Can I touch them? Please?" he asks, polite, sweet, and full of hope that you won't deny him. It's a little funny, considering how just moments ago he was touching you all overā€“ but it's sweet too, how considerate he's trying to be now that you're bare before him despite how eager and worked up he is.
And really, you'd never dream of denying him anythingā€“ but you do have a request of your own to make too. "If you take your shirt off for me first," you tell him, fingers ghosting over his torso, "I want to touch you too, want to see every inch of you."
"Oh," he blinks, his cock that has been semi-hard for the better part of an hour stiffening more as it twitches in response to your words. "Yeahā€“ yeah, of course, want you to touch me too," he finally breathes, wasting no time in lifting his back off the bed to pull his shirt up and over his head.
You giggle at the urgency in which he gets his shirt off, and he smiles back at you when he falls back against the bed. He knows he's eager and excitable, and he has no shame in showing itā€“ he's wanted you way too much and for way too long to act like this is just a typical Saturday night for him.
Even if he makes a fool of himself, he'll be happy and it'll be worth itā€“ because it's you he's doing it for, doing it with, and that's all he's ever needed. "You're so cute, Binnie," you tell him, and he smiles brighter, cutely scrunching his nose that way you love so much, and does whenever he's truly happy.
His hands reach for you first, cupping your breasts with an adorable pout of concentration and determination on his face. He's careful with his squeezes, well aware of how strong his grip can be and not wanting at all to hurt you. He rubs over your nipples with his thumbs, and then between his fingers, licking his lips as he watches them get hard enough to gently roll them.
He looks to you for approval, blinking up at you with hope for praise and affirmation that you like it, that he's doing it right. It makes you want to coo at himā€“ but you resist, and simply reach your hand to his cheek, stroking it with your thumb as you instruct him to keep going. He all but melts into your touch, nuzzling his cheek into your palm and closing his eyes for just a moment to relish in it before he continues.
Changbin sticks his tongue out next, watching you carefully as he brings it to one of your pebbled nipples. You meet him halfway so he doesn't have to strain his neck from lifting it off the pillow, leaning closer to his face as you move your hand to thread your fingers through his curls.
His eyes stay on you as he alternates between where he licks, one of his hands always playing with the nipple that his mouth isn't giving attention to. The moan you let out when he sucks one into his mouth makes his cock throb, and truly, he's never felt as blessed as he does right now, with one of his many fantasies finally becoming a reality.
Still, he's thirsty for moreā€“ he wants to feel you everywhere, to hear your pretty voice sing him praises, to become so absorbed in each other's pleasure that everything else in the world fall away. He wants to envelop you with his body, he wants your touch to consume him, he wants you to both be equally messy and dirty and engrossed in bliss.
"Touch me now, please, anywhere, want you to," he pleads after releasing your nipple from his mouth with a small pop. His face is flushed the prettiest shade of pink, dark eyes soft and pleading behind his glasses, lips wet and hair a messā€“ you don't think you've ever seen anything more perfect and alluring than this.
It makes you want to dote on him, and you'll do just thatā€“ especially if it's something he wants as badly as you. "Anything for you," you oblige, giving him a quick, sweet peck to the top of his head before your hands are once again traveling over his body. You scoot down just enough to be able to reach his neck, pressing kisses beneath his ear before trailing them down.
Changbin intended to keep playing with your chest as you touched him, but he quickly loses focus, sucking in a breath and eyes fluttering closed as your tongue presses against his sweet spot. It's almost overwhelming for himā€“ your hands squeezing the thick muscle of his arms and pecs while you tongue dotes on him, body squirming when your teeth lightly graze over the sensitive skin near his pulse point.
Similar to when you first squeezed him in your hands earlier, another squeak of surprise escapes him when you brush your thumbs over his exposed nipplesā€“ you guess no one's ever done that to him before. You hesitate a moment before repeating the action, wanting first to make sure it's something he's open to experiencing again. He's biting his lip and looking at you not with apprehension like you half expected to see, but curiosity and excitement.
So you do it again, and he gasps, back arching off the bed as his teeth sink further into his bottom lip. Fuck, he never thought he'd be so sensitive thereā€“ and he whines from deep in his throat when you comment on it. "You're so sensitive, Bin," you whisper in near awe, and he's half tempted to cover his mouth with his hand to suppress the moan you threaten to bring out of him with your soft fingers.
His cock is the hardest he thinks it's possibly ever been. You can feel it prodding against your thigh, and poor Changbin, he's so worked up and eager for stimulation that he can't help but grind it against you as you continue to rub his nipples between your fingers. In a different scenario, it'd be the bed or his own hand he'd be helplessly rutting againstā€“ but your thigh is all he has access to.
It makes him feel positively dirty, naughty, but he can't stopā€“ even when the friction from the fabric of his clothes overwhelms him, his hips don't stop moving against you. You look down between your bodies, watch the wet patch on his pants grow as he continues to rut against your thigh.
You want to take one of his nipples into your mouth, but you don't want him to lose the friction against youā€“ so you bend carefully, conscious of keeping your leg pressed against him between his thighs as you wrap your lips around the nipple easiest for you to reach. He whimpersā€“ a high pitched sound you never expected to hear from him as you swirl your tongue around his hardened nipple.
"Fuck, oh fuck, oh my godā€“" Changbin whines, bringing up his hands to once again cover his heated face. It's so embarrassingā€“ how good it feels, how loud he's being, how he just can't seem to stop himself from seeking the delicious friction your thigh provides him. Overwhelming too, how close he is to cumming already, his body taut and high strung.
His hips begin to stutter, sweat steadily building on his brow, his stomach clenching as he tries his best to hold back the inevitable. "Are you close, Binnie? Gonna cum just like this?" you release his nipple from your mouth to ask him sweetly. Against your expectations, he quickly shakes his headā€“ as if fighting against himself before he lowers his hands and looks at you with glassy eyes.
"Don'tā€“ don't want to," he tells you after another obscene whine, "wanna fuck you first, don't wanna cum until I fuck you." The way he looks at you as he says it makes your heart jolt and stomach twist. Messy hair stuck to his forehead with sweat, pouty bottom lip swollen and red, eyes pleading and desperate.
God, he's fucking cuteā€“ positively delectable. You'll have to save eating him for next time, though; right now, you just want to give him everything he asks for. "You want to fuck me?" you ask him, reaching your hand down to dip under the waistband of his pants and underwear. It's sticky and wet, pre-cum smeared all over the inside of the fabric.
He keens, nodding eagerly as he squirms beneath the touch of your soft, warm hand. It's such a contrast from the prior sensation, but just as equally overwhelming. You stroke him slowly; just enough to keep him worked up, but not enough to make him cum. His eyes are fluttering closed, hands twisting the sheets beneath him, hips jolting up to meet your strokes.
"You're so thick, Binnie," you tell him, and he throbs from the compliment, whining almost helplessly. It's true tooā€“ you're not just saying it to make him feel good. It's not the longest you've ever held, but it's definitely the thickestā€“ you can't even wrap your hand entirely around it. "Think you can help me get ready to take it?" you ask, needing to suppress the urge to giggle when he enthusiastically nods.
"Anything! I'll do anything for you, anything you need," he babbles, and you thank him with a sweet kiss that he happily returns. He whines when you stop touching him and pry yourself away, hips chasing your touch even though he's the one who wanted you to stopā€“ his body just can't help it.
He watches breathlessly as you stand from the bed, sliding your thumbs into the waistband of your pajamas and slowly pulling them down along with your panties. He decides to follow your lead, scrambling to lift himself from the bed and pull the rest of his clothes off in one quick motion.
Both bare, you take a moment to stare at one another. You get a better view of Changbin's drooling cock, while he finally gets a glimpse at your pussyā€“ and fuck, is it the prettiest thing he's ever seen. How did he get so fucking lucky?
You come back to the bed, and instead of letting you crawl back on top of him, Changbin gently guides you to the side of him and onto your back. You spread your legs for him once you're comfortable, and he props himself up on his elbow, looking down at your body, so gorgeous and perfect.
He isn't well practiced, so he mimics the actions taken in one of his favorite, more intimate porn videos. He starts with kissing you, slow but messy, his tongue exploring every inch of your mouth. His hand travels down the length of your torso, and he can't help but gasp and break away from the kiss when he reaches your core, and your arousal coats his fingers.
"Oh my god, do youā€“ do you always get this wet?" he asks, almost mesmerized by how effortlessly his fingers glide between your folds. "Only for you," you answer; you don't know if he believes it, but it's true. The only other times you've ever gotten this soaked were in the privacy of your bedroom, when you touched yourself with Changbin's image at the forefront of your imagination.
He continues to rub his fingers up and down between your folds until his fingers are completely coated, and only then does he finally ask, "Can I.. is- is it okay to put my fingers inside?" He blushes when you smile at him and nod, spreading your legs further apart while telling him exactly what he wants to hear. "Yeah, please, I want you to."
He presses the tips of his fingers to your hole before he slowly pushes one inside, watching in breathlessly awe as it disappears inside your warm, wet heat. You're so slick that it slides in and out easily, and soon enough you're instructing him to add another, and then one more, to which he easily obliges.
He can't decide where he wants to look more; between your legs, where his fingers thrust steadily in and out of you, or to your face, beautifully contorted in pleasureā€“ so he ends up alternating between both. "Is thisā€“ is it good for you?" he asks the next time he looks at your face, desperate to perform well for you.
If there's anything he can do better, anything he needs to do differently, he needs to knowā€“ he'll follow any instruction you give him in a heartbeat. "Your fingersā€“ when they're all the way inside, can you curl them for me, please?" you ask, and he's immediately doing exactly as you tell him, curling his fingers right against your sweet spot.
"Like this?" he asks, sliding his fingers out and quickly pushing them back inside, curling them to hit your spot, and then pulling them back out to repeat the motion. You let out whines and breathless moans, voice quickly growing shakier and shakier as you try to keep talking him through it.
"Y-Yeah, just like that, keepā€“ keep going just like that," you tell him, voice unsteady between your whimpers and moans, but it's easily the prettiest sounds Changbin's ever heardā€“ he just knows he'll become addicted to them.
He's addicted to everything about you, reallyā€“ all of it is so captivating. The sounds you cry out, as well as the ones coming from between your legs as his fingers thrust in and out of you. He's mesmerized by how your thighs tremble and twitch when he picks up his pace, by the rapid rise and fall of your chest, by the way your eyes roll back as he drives you closer to sweet release.
"Bin, Binnieā€“ 'm so close, just needā€“ need a little more," you tell him between quick, shaky breaths. "Tell me," Changbin requests, slowing down the motion of his fingers just enough for you to be able to speak with more ease, "tell me what you need."
"Here, touch me here," you instruct, reaching your hand down to point him to your puffy, neglected clit. "With your thumb," you add after you show him, and he nods, pressing his thumb to your clit as he resumes the previous, quick motion of his fingers inside you.
He can feel you clench tighter around his fingers, while the sounds that escape you soon pick up in volume. Your thighs squeeze together and limit the motion of his hand, so he sticks to simply curling his fingers while rubbing your clit with his thumb. It only takes a few more strokes of his thumb to have your back arching off the bed, his name coming out in a choked sob.
Changbin doesn't slip his fingers out of you right away, instead keeping them inside until your breathing starts to steady and your thighs relax. "Was it.. did I do okay?" he asks after you've caught your breath, and God, the way you smile at himā€“ he's sure he's never seen anything more radiant.
"You were perfect," you answer, leaning up to wrap your arms around him and pull him into a kiss. "So perfect, felt so good," you continue between pressing kisses to his lips, "want you now." A shiver is sent straight down his spine; is this finally, really going to happen after so many nights spent hoping for it? ā€œDo you have protection?ā€ you ask after pulling away, and he pouts as he considers it.
He did have some, but.. how long has it been since the last time he had sex? Heā€™s not confident he even remembers where he put them last; it hasnā€™t really been something pressing on his mind considering he discovered casual flings werenā€™t really his thing, and he thought the only person he wanted to have sex with, you, was unavailable.
ā€œUh, I think so! ..maybe?ā€ he mumbles as he crawls over to his nightstand and starts haphazardly shoving things aside while searching through it. You giggle as you sit up and crawl over yourself, deciding to help him look for one in his messy drawer. ā€œAh, thereā€™s one!ā€ you point to where you see the corner of a packet sticking out from under the book youā€™re pretty sure heā€™s been reading on and off for like, 6 months now.Ā 
ā€œThank God,ā€ you hear him mutter under his breath as he lifts the book up to grab it, and you giggle again; you donā€™t think thereā€™ll ever be a time you donā€™t find him endlessly adorable. It wouldn't have been a big deal if he didnā€™t have one, of course, as you usually carried around spares in your bag, but there was something really endearing about his urgency to find one.
Heā€™s pretty sure that the condoms expiration date hasnā€™t passed, but he still checks first regardlessā€“ better to be safe than sorry, and all. ā€œAll good?ā€ you ask as you watch him check it over, and smile when he crawls back to you and plants a giddy kiss to your lips.
ā€œYep! All good,ā€ he smiles, settling himself between your legs after you rest back against the bed. Heā€™s honestly pretty nervous, but his joy to be with someone he loves so much does wonders for distracting his brain from the fear of not performing to some imaginary standard of perfection in bed.
Changbin stops when itā€™s time to open the condom, staring at it for a moment as if considering what to do. Youā€™re about to ask him if he needs help, but he ends up speaking again before you can. ā€œUh, I know tearing it open with my teeth is sexy or whatever, but I think Iā€™d fuck it up so Iā€™m not gonna do that,ā€ he says, and you canā€™t help but laugh. Your silly boy.Ā 
ā€œDonā€™t worry, youā€™re already plenty sexy without doing stuff like that,ā€ you tell him. ā€œAm I?ā€ he asks, another cute smile spreading on his lips when you nod, and confirm that heā€™s very sexy. Cute too, you tell him, easily the cutest person in the whole world. And his eyes crinkle and nose scrunches in the way you love again as he giggles.Ā 
What amazing duality your boyfriend has; so strong and intimidating in physique, but with the softest, sweetest personality youā€™ve ever known anyone to have. Heā€™s so perfect.Ā 
He rips open the packet with his hands, and the condom slips from his fingers when he first pulls it out, but he thankfully manages to catch it before it falls on you, or the bed. "My bad," he says with a shy, slightly awkward laugh; maybe he's more nervous than he initially thought.
He's suddenly extremely conscious of how fast his heart is beating, and of the tremble in his hands. "Want me to help?" you ask, smiling at him sweetly when he timidly nods. "Ah, yeah, if you don't mind," he mutters, and you quickly sit back up, placing your hands over his.
"Keep this one here," you instruct as you bring his hand to the base of his cock to hold in place and keep still. "And then we're gonna roll it down, like this," you guide the hand holding the condom to the tip of his cock, helping him spread it smoothly down his length with your fingers atop his.
If it were anyone else, he might feel embarrassed or a little ashamed over needing help, and for needing to be guided like this with something he feels most guys his age already have perfected. But with you, it just feels sweet and intimate; he can tell there's no judgment, and you're not going to make fun of him for not quite knowing how best to do things.
He's safe with you. And he's glad that out of all the billions of people in the world that he could've met, befriended, and then fallen in love with, that it was you.
You lay back against the bed after Changbin thanks you for your help with a kiss, but you notice he still looks nervous, so you hold up your hand to offer it to him. He smiles as he takes it in his, and you give him a reassuring squeeze after he intertwines his fingers with yours. He uses his other hand to align himself with your hole, and takes a breath before starting to finally push himself inside.
You both squeeze each otherā€™s hand; Changbin because fuck, it already feels so good even with just the tip inside, and you because even with 3 of his fingers prepping you for his cock, itā€™s still a stretch. Heā€™s pushing inside slowly, and itā€™s thankfully to both your benefitā€“ because heā€™d definitely cum if he didnā€™t, and youā€™re sure thereā€™d be a sting if he pushed it all in at once.
He whimpers as he bottoms out, his hand still squeezing yours as he tries desperately to ground himself.Ā ā€œGod, you feel so good, canā€™tā€“ canā€™t believe how tight you are, oh my god,ā€ he whines, absolutely sure that if it wasnā€™t for the condom he wouldā€™ve cum from the very moment he felt your walls squeezing around him.
ā€œYouā€™re big,ā€ you reply breathlessly, reaching your free hand up to the back of his neck to pull him down, closer to you, ā€œso fucking big, feel so full.ā€Ā ā€œFuck, donā€™t say that, Iā€™ll cumā€“ā€ he groans, and you can feel his cock twitch and throb, as if it to confirm to you he means it. A kiss is the only apology you offer now that his lips are in reach of yours, and he lets go of your hand to prop himself up on his elbows.
He rests his forehead against yours when he pulls away, and slowly, he starts to pull out. ā€œGonnaā€“ gonna fuck you now,ā€ he breathes, pulling out almost completely before slowly pushing back inside, ā€œgonna, ohā€“ fuck, gonna make you feel good too, promise.ā€ You bite your lip, muffling a whine as he continues to build his slow, but steady pace. You donā€™t think youā€™ve ever been fucked slowly by anyone, but fuck, it feels good.
You hold his face in your hands, kissing him deep and messy, with your tongue shoved as far into his mouth as itā€™ll go. Youā€™re both panting by the time one of you pulls away, and oh, when he looks at youā€“ his heart feels like it could stop right then and there. Youā€™re so beautiful, heā€™s so in love with you, and the way you look at him so full of tenderness and adoration makes his head spin.Ā 
He buries his head into your neck as he starts to fuck you faster, genuinely afraid that heā€™ll cry if he looks in your eyes any longer. You wrap your arms around him, clinging to his body as you start to roll your hips to meet his thrusts and help him to hit your spot. He moans your name, one of his hands snaking underneath your body to pull you even closer.
Youā€™re pressed to him, chest to chest, bodies hot and sweaty. His face feels unbearably hot, and when he lifts his face from your neck, the lenses of his glasses have almost completely fogged over. ā€œBin, oh my goodness,ā€ you giggle as you reach up to take his glasses off for him, and he giggles too, though itā€™s quickly cut off by another moan.Ā 
Itā€™s easy to tell that heā€™s getting close, and it really comes as no surpriseā€“ heā€™s been so hard for so long now, and he purposely staved off his orgasm just for this moment. His thrusts become more desperate, the throbbing of his cock more constant as he squeezes and holds you tighter. His pace isnā€™t perfect and his thrusts arenā€™t precise enough, he knows, but he hopes heā€™s still doing well enough to at least uphold his promise to make you feel just as good as he does.Ā 
He can feel you trying to snake your dominant hand between your bodies, and he pulls away from you enough to make it easier for you once he realizes what youā€™re trying to do. He tries to watch, but the very moment your fingers start to rub your clit, you clench around him and it makes his eyes roll back as he moans.Ā 
Changbin whimpers when you moan his name, hips stuttering and thrusts becoming erratic. ā€œC-Close, oh my god, ā€˜m so close,ā€ he whines, begrudgingly letting you go so he can dig his fingers into the mattress instead so he doesnā€™t accidentally hurt you. His knuckles quickly turn white, and though it makes him emotional to do, he looks you in the eye.
Itā€™s now that it really sets in just how much Changbin cares about you. Thereā€™s no one else heā€™d ever do this with, no one in the world he wants more than he wants you, and you can see it in the way he looks down at you. His furrowed brows and watery eyes, his bottom lip that trembles, the desperate, almost pathetic cries of your name. He lets you see his most vulnerable self, because he trusts you and loves you.Ā 
You reach to his face, cupping his face in your hand to guide him down to you. He thinks youā€™re going to kiss him, and you are close enough to, as he's able to feel your breath against his lips. But you donā€™tā€“ instead you whisper words that make his world tilt on its axis, a loud, desperate moan escaping from deep in his chest as he cums.
"I love you.ā€
He fills the condom with long, thick and sticky spurts, his entire body trembling. In turn, it only takes a few more strokes of your fingers to cum again, your eyes rolling back as the white hot pleasure licks over every inch of your skin. Changbin collapses first, careful to fall in a way that wonā€™t completely smother you beneath him.Ā 
He pulls out slowly after he catches his breath, and then carefully removes the condom from his softening length. He leans over your body to toss it in the trash bin near his bed before he falls back down next to you, and wraps an arm around you to pull you closer. You end up in the same cuddling position you were in at the start of the night, with Changbin half on his back, and you with an arm thrown over his body and leg tucked between his.
Youā€™re naked this time, thereā€™s an ā€œAre you still there?ā€ pop up on the tv thatā€™s since gone ignored, and you told Changbin you love him. So itā€™s better, he thinks; everything about where you are now is better. ā€œI love you too,ā€ he finally says, and you giggle, scooching up so you can kiss him. ā€œTook you long enough to say it back,ā€ you say, and he giggles too, happy beyond words to finally have everything heā€™s ever wished for.
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network tags: @skzstarnet @ksmutsociety
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cyle Ā· 1 year ago
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So what is the threshold in declaring whether this experiment is a mistake or not? Do we need to send feedback in daily? Stop using the site altogether? What will actually be counted vs written off as people not liking change?
when we A/B test something, it means that one group of people has the new thing, and one group of people has the old thing. this youtube video is a very quick way of explaining that process, i suggest watching it first here.
in this case, with the new navigation layout, our hypothesis is that the new layout will be more easily understood by more people, meaning we'll see more engagement with the navigation items themselves. like literally, more clicks to the things we now have labels for, when before they were just an icon. and the fact they're in a place that's become more standard across the internet: a left-aligned sidebar.
ideally, that will lead to better retention of new users, and even an "aha" moment for people who have been on tumblr for a long time but never really looked at those different destinations. i've been on tumblr since 2009 and even i've found myself clicking on the inbox and activity more than ever, with the new change.
for us to see the change as a "mistake", we'd need to see statistical evidence to contradict that hypothesis, which we're already tracking automatically for everyone in the test. we'd also need to get an overwhelming amount of feedback to contradict any positive gains we do see. sending in negative feedback daily won't do that.
so if you want the whole thing to go away: we need to see a negative behavior change in potentially millions of peoples' behavior. that has happened before! we've rolled changes back that caused that negative reaction. that's the whole point of these experiments.
and if you want to send us feedback about how the experience is negatively affecting you: please, please do!!! despite the statistical evidence, we want to know if there are accessibility concerns we missed, usability concerns, design considerations, etc etc, because that's why we're running this as an experiment and not just launching it to everyone. that feedback is really important to us, as long as it's constructive.
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raysrays Ā· 8 months ago
Text
Crimson Guardian NSFW
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Kyojuro Rengoku x Wife! Reader
18+ MDNI!šŸš«
CW: NSFW Content, minor angst, controlling/manipulating behavior, fluff-ish.
Y/N POV
Scenario : You've recently married into the respected Rengoku family, and while you continue your work as a demon slayer, life starts to get a bit messy. Balancing your duties becomes a real challenge as you navigate the challenges of married life. You find yourself having to make tough choices just to keep your husband happy, all while debating to stay true to yourself and your calling as a demon slayer.
Marriage. Truly one of the most beautiful milestones a couple can achieve. Marrying Kyojuro has undoubtedly been my greatest accomplishment.
I still remember it vividly, as if it were yesterday. Surrounded by friends, family, and core members, we pledged our lives to each other. Though it wasn't the most glamorous wedding ever seen, it was enough. Because really, all I've ever wanted was Kyojuro, and now, finally, I have him.
For the first few months, our marriage was nothing short of perfect. I moved into the Rengoku estate with Kyojuro's family, assisting Shenjuro with chores and gradually trying to get closer to Shinjuro. Though I'm not sure how successful I was.
It was only six months in that I realized being a demon slayer and a wife wasn't as easy as I thought.
Before our relationship, I was Kyojuro's Tsuguko. He was simply my mentor, and I trained hard under him to get myself where I am today. It was later down the road that we noticed each other's lingering gazes, the occasional flirting, and all the other subtle hints of wanting to be more.
Kyojuro was strong, and I knew he wanted a family, but I simply wasn't ready to give up training and my duties as a demon slayer just yet.
Every day, after helping out around the estate, I would hike over to HQ and pick up where I had left off the previous day, training until the late hours of the night. I would often come home exhausted, which usually caused Kyojuro to worry. As much as I reassured him, he never seemed fully convinced.
Now, here I was, sitting at the dinner table with Kyo across from me. It was a rare occasion for us to eat alone together like this. We made small talk about our day and training, and then he finally stopped eating and put his silverware down.
"Little Flame, I think itā€™s time we have a serious discussion about the way things have been as of late,ā€ his usual happy smile seemed almost nervous.
I set my spoon down on my plate, giving him my full attention.
ā€œYes? What is it?ā€
ā€œSunflower, you have been working so hard as of late, and itā€™s quite admirable. I truly admire your dedication to the demon slayer corps and your training!ā€
ā€œButā€¦?ā€ I ask, confused.
ā€œButā€¦ since our marriage, Iā€™ve found myself in constant worry over you. Every time you go on a mission without me, I have to painfully wait for your return. Not knowing whether or not you'd be injured or even-ā€œ
ā€œDead?ā€ I finish.
I saw his body tense up at the word.
ā€œYes, my love. Dead. I cannot even bear the thought of you never returning to me. It pains me to my core,ā€ he seemed so sad, so worried about me.
I know Kyojuro, I know he didnā€™t mean anything bad by what he was saying. However, I felt almost offended. He too was a slayer, a hashira. I also had to deal with the fear of him returning with serious injuries or even never returning at all.
Did he believe me to be incapable of protecting myself? He was the very one who trained me. Even though I knew Kyojuro was strong, much stronger than me, it just felt like he lacked faith in me.
ā€œYou donā€™t think Iā€™m strong enough anymore? Do you think marriage has made me soft?ā€ I realized I might have come off a little too harsh, but my emotions were getting the best of me.
His expression seemed surprised, but I could tell. While he may not have used those words, that was definitely the gist of it.
I watched him get up from his place at the table and walk over to me. He pulled my chair out from under the table, then grabbed my hands and kneeled down in front of me.
His big, bright eyes were now staring up at me.
ā€œYou are one of the strongest people I know, my love. I know how capable you are, but please rememberā€¦ā€
He brought my hands to his lips, kissing them softly.
ā€œYou are my wife before you are a demon slayer. I cannot risk sending you off only for you to never return.ā€
I could practically hear the desperation and love in his voice.
Kyojuro wasnā€™t someone who would usually discourage anyone from pursuing something they're passionate about. So if he was now, I knew that itā€™s something heā€™s been internally battling with for a while.
ā€œWhat about you? Is it not the same? What about my worry? What if you never come home to me?ā€ I could feel my face start to heat up. Everything he was saying seemed to come from genuine care, but it felt so hypocritical.
ā€œI am a Hashira, my little flame. I have a certain responsibility you do not have to burden yourself with. I shall retire soon, in just a few years. So pleaseā€¦ā€
Thereā€™s no way heā€™d ask me-
ā€œPlease retire your sword, Y/N. Please stay home for me. Please allow my heart to rest easy knowing you'll be here waiting for me whenever I shall return,ā€ his voice was pleading.
I felt so conflicted. Iā€™d worked so hard. All of these years of training to hopefully become a high-ranking swordsman myself. However, at the same time, I never stopped to consider my romantic life and how being married would affect things.
We both sat there in silence for a few moments, and I finally rose up from the chair, pulling him up off his knees along with me.
I looked up at him, reaching my hand up to rest on his cheek.
ā€œKyojuro, you are the only one I would retire my sword for. So please promise me, promise me you will always come home to me. Until the day you yourself retire.ā€
ā€œI promise you, Sunflower. As long as I know you are safe and waiting for me, there is no demon that could ever keep me away.ā€
I felt his hand on my lower back and the other holding up my chin.
We both leaned in, our lips meeting in a tender kiss.
This kiss started so gently, so lovingly at first. As we pulled away for just a moment, staring into each otherā€™s eyes, we realized how long it had been since we really enjoyed each otherā€™s company.
After that, the kiss only grew hotter and more passionate.
Kyojuro swept me off my feet and carried me straight to our shared room at the back of the estate, the most private spot. It seemed fitting for newlyweds, after all.
As he gently laid me back on the soft futon, I couldn't help but stay focused on him. Kyojuro was simply beautiful. His hair, his eyes, his body, everything about him looked like he was perfectly sculpted.
My admiration was interrupted as I felt him begin to kiss me again. One of his hands traveling to my breasts, gently squeezing it.
The other massaging my thigh.
I feel him pull away from me starting to kiss on my neck traveling all the way down to my chest.
Kyojuro had always known my weak points and how to make me say yes to his every request. He knew my body just as well as I did, and now he was taking full advantage of that knowledge.
I could feel him pressing against me as he moved his hand down my body, lightly touching me. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him closer to me, wanting more.
Then I heard, Kyojuro's soft voice whisper these words, almost as a demand. "Enjoy this little flame, you've kept me waiting far too long.ā€
As soon as those words left his lips, I felt myself begin to relax. His movements were so gentle, so careful, so loving.
His fingers trailed down my sides, sending chills through my body. His hands went back up and caressed my neck, making me tremble. He kissed me once more, and I melted into him.
It was as if he had cast a spell over me, and all I could do was obey him. He was completely in control of me.
After a moment, I felt him move back down and remove my underwear, revealing my already wet entrance. His hand slid between my thighs, and I couldn't help but let out a moan as his finger slipped inside me. He was gentle at first, just barely grazing me, but it felt incredible.
"Is this okay?" he asked softly, his breath hot against my ear.
I nodded but I could tell that wasnā€™t enough for him.
ā€œUse your words my love.ā€ He demanded sweetly.
ā€œYes Kyo, itā€™s perfect.ā€ I said, my voice trembling.
He leaned down and kissed my lips before pulling back again, smiling at me.
"I want to be inside of you," he whispered, his voice filled with desire.
"Please," I begged.
He removed his fingers, replacing them with his cock, his tip rubbing against my clit.
"Good girl," he whispered, thrusting into me.
I threw back my head, arching my back and digging my nails into his shoulders. His movements were slow and deep at first and then they became faster and harder, and soon my whole body began to shake. I couldn't stop the moans from escaping my lips, and I couldn't help but beg for more.
When he starts to speed up I know we are both about to reach our limit.
I feel his fingers interlock with mine and his lips pressing against mine again, but this time, he wasnā€™t just kissing me, he was also letting his teeth graze my bottom lip.
He was biting down hard enough to draw blood.
We were both so close and we were both trying to hold back but we couldnā€™t anymore. We were finally going to let ourselves release.
I was the first one to let myself go, arching my back as I moaned his name.
Then he followed not too far behind.
After he finishes, we just lay there for a bit catching our breath.
ā€œI love you, Y/N,ā€ he finally breathed out, turning his head to look at me.
I turned to face him as well. ā€œI love you, Kyojuro.ā€
After that, the two of us drifted off in each other's arms for the rest of the night.
The next morning when I awoke, I was still trapped wrapped in Kyojuro's arms.
After a bit of struggling, I managed to maneuver my way out and make it to the kitchen.
There I saw Senjuro, who was already preparing breakfast for everyone.
ā€œGood morning, Sen,ā€ I greeted with a yawn.
ā€œOh, good morning, Y/N!ā€
ā€œI'm almost finished with breakfast. Is my brother awake yet?ā€
ā€œHe should be awake soon. We both have to see Master Kagaya today,ā€ I said, rubbing my eyes.
He stopped to turn and look at me.
ā€œDid something bad happen?ā€ he asked nervously.
Poor Senjuro always assumes the absolute worst in every situation. Well, I suppose in this case itā€™s somewhat understandable.
ā€œNo, Sen, nothing's wrong. Kyojuro and I are just going to inform Master Kagaya of my retirement. Thatā€™s all.ā€
He gave a puzzled look.
ā€œRetirement? Why? Havenā€™t you been training for years to improve your sword skills to move up in the ranks?ā€ he asked.
He was right. I know I shouldnā€™t go back on my word to Kyojuro, but I really was having second thoughts about my decision.
Senjuro could probably sense my doubt because his next response was:
"If this is something that you're not sure of, then you shouldn't do it. If you have doubts about this decision, then maybe you're not ready for retirement just yet."
His words really struck a chord with me.
Maybe he was right.
Before I could ponder that any further, Kyojuro had made his way into the kitchen.
"Good morning! How are my two favorite people doing?" he said cheerfully.
I smiled.
"Morning, Kyo. Did you sleep well?"
"I did, actually. Thank you, little flame," he walked over to me, giving me a kiss.
I could feel my chest tightening, nervous about what was to come.
The whole time at breakfast, I felt so spaced out. All I could hear was Kyojuro and Senjuro talking and the occasional grunt from Shinjuro drinking away at the table.
ā€œSunflower? Are you okay?ā€
I was snapped out of my daze by Kyojuro waving a hand in front of my face. All three of them were staring at me, kind of concerned.
ā€œOh, yeah, Iā€™m fine. Sorry.ā€
I shook my head a little and looked down at my plate. I felt bad for Senjuro going through all that trouble to cook, but I simply couldnā€™t eat right now.
After we finished breakfast, Kyojuro and I headed out.
The thought that this would be the last time wearing my uniform with my sword by my side was so weird and almost uncomfortable to me.
I knew that this day would come eventually, but I always hoped in the back of my mind that Kyojuro would be the one to retire before me.
I had been so focused on training and my duties as a demon slayer that it had never even occurred to me how my marriage would affect everything.
I was now a wife. My first priority should be the estate, and helping Shinjuro while he was in his state of grief, and being there for Senjuro as well.
It wouldnā€™t be right of me to go against my husband's wishes either. Especially after the intimate moment we shared. Right?
As we made it to HQ waiting to speak with the master I felt my heartbeat racing inside of me.
The room was quiet, I could feel Kyojuroā€™s eyes lingering on me but I couldnā€™t bring myself to face him right now.
Both mine and Kyojuroā€™s attention was shifted as we heard the door open and Master Kagaya entered the room.
"Rengoku, Y/N. It's a pleasure to see you both," Kagaya said, his face as warm as ever.
"It's wonderful to see you too, Master," I replied.
"So what brings you two here? It seems urgent, judging by the fact that you came in so early."
"It is very urgent," Kyojuro began.
He then proceeded to explain our conversation from the night before, and how I was considering retiring.
"Y/N, this is a big decision, and it's important that you feel comfortable and confident in it. Do you think you can fully retire, knowing you won't be able to assist the demon slayers as you are now?" Kagaya asked.
I looked at the master and then glanced at Kyojuro. He seemed so proud and happy that we were here. I could feel the warmth radiating from him.
But, I could also sense the worry in his expression. He was nervous, scared almost.
I couldn't do that to him.
"Master, I've spent most of my life training for the opportunity to become a hashira. To serve the demon slayer corps and protect those who cannot protect themselves. But...I'm no longer just a demon slayer. I'm also a wife, and as such, I think it's only right that I focus on that," I answered.
The room fell silent for a moment.
"If you truly feel this is the right choice, then we support you, Y/N," Kagaya finally spoke.
"Thank you, Master," I bowed.
"Thank you so much, Master! I will never
forget your kindness!" Kyojuro bowed as well.
The two of us left the room and started to head out.
As we exited, we ran into a few of the other Hashira, who asked us about what we had gone to see Master Kagaya about.
They too seemed surprised and a little concerned when Kyojuro explained to them that I would be retiring so soon.
I could tell some of their reactions to the news annoyed Kyojuro. Shinobu used the word ā€œcontrolling,ā€ and you could see his smile almost falter.
"Controlling" was never a word I would have used to describe my husband. He just loves me, right? He wants to protect me. There's no way my sweet and kind Kyo would ever do anything to control or manipulate me.
Right?
Part Two
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