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#what are our thoughts lads
oftenlyshitposting · 11 months
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thinking thoughts about shin and blasters since we haven't seen shin shooting away with a blaster
do you think shin has the obi-wan "so uncivilized" attitude with blasters and much prefer using the force ezra 'hippie space jesus' bridger way when she doesn't have her lightsaber?
or is she suspiciously good with blasters and the reason why she doesn't use them is because she goes danny 'so anyway i started blasting' devito with blasters that it turned sabine on so much?
i mean, we've seen shin fly a starfighter and is a pretty good pilot slash squadron leader which means she's had weapons training beforehand, right?
it'd be so funny if shin and sabine had to reluctantly (but not really) team up against a group of enemies and she goes "fuck it", snatches one of sabine's blasters from her holsters, and shoots away; while sabine is just there completely flabbergasted before finally joining shin
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egophiliac · 4 months
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queen of diamonds, upright + reversed 💎
I've redone this like eighty times, I have to just be done with it now and stop staring at all my mistakes oh no 🫠
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 8 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 8 spoilers#coming in well after the fact but that's what happens when the art doesn't cooperate#and i just HAD to draw something for vil's ob (re-ob?) because i loved it so much#legit put my hand over my mouth and went “oh!” when i realized what was happening#i thought it was just going to be an idia thing because. y'know. closing out his character arc from episode 6 and all#so this was like. oh! oh we're going to get ALL the inky boys!!!!!#i wonder if this is why we got a malleus flashback so early...#not to mention everyone's dreams?!#i am braced for 90% of the dreams to be kind of jokey/inconsequential because we have SO many characters to get through#and most of the time will probably be spent on our lads (literally) dropkicking their emotional problems#but i am excited to see everyone regardless!#and also kind of terrified! what on EARTH will floyd be dreaming about. do i want to know.#i do but do i want to.#man. they're probably not going to get back to it but i do wonder what silver's dream was#what was he doing when he was like 'wait a minute' and noped right out of there#lilia: here silver i made dinner :)#silver: oh boy this looks great! ...YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD#ouuuagh i'm still deep in the blotsauce guys and i'm loving it#come make snowangels in the ink with me it's great
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sweetheartvalle · 1 year
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new dnf kissgate just dropped on twt??
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hella1975 · 11 months
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hiiii haha. hello. exceptionally awkward introduction bc idrk how to start something like this so let's just jump right in. im taking a break from this account for a bit. i know i said i wanted taob out before halloween and currently im fine sticking with that deadline, but if i decide i need longer away then i will take longer away. every time ive reassured people that id never abandon a fic and updates will always come eventually i never once considered that my writing and ability to feel safe and comfortable on this site would be actively taken from me, so im not even going to apologise. i dont want this either and more importantly i dont fucking deserve it. i dont know what it is in the past year, if ive hit a certain amount of followers or 'popularity' that's made it so the natural ratio of positive to negative interactions must in turn go up, but there's been a serious uptick in weird asks for me. the annoying part is that a very small amount of them are actually objectively mean and hateful, the rest are just weird and invasive from people who seemingly dont realise that's what they're being. ive reached a point where i dont care if the intentions are good. it's not my job as a 20 year old tumblr user of all things to defend the morality of someone who couldnt even bother to come off anon. unfortunately, after blocking only one or two anons, the weird asks have decreased substantially, which says all you need to know about the fascinating and exhilarating lives led by these people, but ive also gone on to turn anon asks off entirely. this is something i actively fought against doing and had to be pushed into by my mutuals (who have been the coolest people on planet earth during this entire thing). turning off anon was a big deal to me even if it sounds silly. i felt betrayed and like id been backed into a corner because it was so vehmently something i DIDNT WANT that to feel like i had to do it anyway for my own mental health??? that sucks. so even though ive 'fixed' the problem, im still kind of reeling and uncomfortable every time i come on tumblr. i hope it's just something i need time to ease because i'll truly be devastated if this becomes 'ruined' for me. tumblr exists as the only place in the world where i am honestly every facet of myself without shame or hesitation; losing that would be insanely harmful to me. and to the people who cant appeal to the actual human behind the post, let me put that in words you can understand: we wouldn't get any more writing 😦😦😦 riots and fires and sirens, i know. so yeah. to anyone who has sent me an anon ask and you're now wondering if you were part of the problem, im firmly of the belief that you'll know if you are. when i say 'weird asks' i dont mean 'you sent me a para about your personal life just to vent or ask for advice' or 'you sent me a really deep emotional compliment about the impact me and/or my writing has had on you' - i love asks like that, so much that i put off taking a break and turning off anon solely for the joy they bring me. im sorry that it might feel like you're being punished too bc of the actions of what in reality is a HANDFUL of weird people, but this is what i feel like i have to do to feel safe and not go insane every time i log in. love you guys, hopefully ill see you soon x
#seriously another shout out to my mutuals#id particularly like to say thank you to boom who's always right there for me no matter what's happening or how insane im being#and also everyone in our little discord that wound up having to make a whole new channel for venting#bc i was there so often like 'today's weird ask isssss.... telling me about my cupsize!! rip them to shreds!!!'#hannah and theo especially being there and pushing me to finally turn off anon. war is truly over#and of course rori bc the shamelessness u show when hating on my anon asks has been genuinely really cathartic#sometimes u really do just need a rottweiler mutual to tell random people online to kill themselves 😭#okay weird oscar acceptance speechcore gratitude over. i do just rlly love my mutuals#like i went three years not telling anyone about the worse side of internet popularity for fear of looking spoiled and ungrateful#so for the first time to open up about it and be met with outrage on my behalf and people saying in fact it's MORE fucked up#than i initially realised bc ive grown desensitised to it is. yeah cathartic i guess#they are singlehandedly reassuring me of the good this cursed app still holds#so everyone thank them and send them flowers NOW#okay im done i think. see you guys soon. i truly do want to come back asap bc like i said i NEVER EVEN WANTED TO FUCKING LEAVE#SOME ASSHOLES JUST HAD TO PUT GRENADES ON WHAT I ASSUMED WERE VERY UNIVERSAL AND OBVIOUS BOUNDARIES#if you're reading this like 'ohhh fuck i defo sent something invasive lately. i thought it was a joke/we were friends'#then 1) we arent friends if you're on anon. it immediately creates a power imbalance where you know me and any necessary context#but i have no idea who you are or how much you know about me. that's already a fucked dynamic#and 2) I HOPE YOU FEEL BAD. LIKE GENUINELY I HOPE YOU FEEL AWFUL AND HAVE A GOOD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF#okay i think that's all. ta-ra lads??? how tf do u end something like this#ive queued this to reblog a couple more times throughout the day
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I've only just started chapter 3 of Gaiden but I am absolutely obsessed with the theme of powerlessness and how it's conveyed within the game.
I can't help but notice how often Kiryu says he 'doesn't have a choice' when doing pretty much anything. Even if it's in super banal, low-stakes interactions like doing something for Akame, he's constantly stating that he feels as if he has no agency in his current situation.
In the previous Kiryu Saga games, Kiryu is painfully aware of the consequences of his actions, but he still regards them as choices that he made; not something he was forced into.
His status as a Daidoji agent has basically beaten him into submission. He'll occasionally try to fight against this absolute control over him, but he's eventually returned to his position as a pawn in this huge, shadowy organization. The Daidoji are the first organization/power structure that managed to get control over Kiryu's tendency to burn shit to the ground and good god do they take advantage of that.
But then Kiryu's also painfully aware that this is the reality he asked for. Not only does he outright say this multiple times, but he's telling others that 'they started this' when they're confronting him and it's so obvious that he's talking to himself.
He's constantly bouncing between feeling miserable and powerless and then resenting these feelings and berating himself for having them in the first place. He's grasping at any sliver of control he can still have over his life, not to find meaning in his new existence, but to further punish and abuse himself.
I can't remember the exact post, but I saw someone describe Gaiden as a love letter to the Kiryu Saga and that's the best way to describe it, I think.
Kiryu's arc in his games is an incredibly slow car crash where we witness in painful detail how incapable he is of permanently leaving his life as yakuza to protect his family.
He has this almost codependent relationship with the Tojo Clan and feels a compulsive urge to get involved in the constant crises happening.
Of course, there were outside factors that were trying to pull him into these conflicts. Everyone believes that he's the only one who can fix everything. Kiryu's name carries power. Isn't it disgustingly selfish to refuse to get involved when he was the one who chose the clan's chairmen?
How could he refuse to deliver a single letter after the 5th chairman was shot right in front of him?
How could he ignore the people threatening to take his orphanage away from him and his kids?
How could he tell his daughter that she can't become an idol because of his past?
How could he justify staying alive when it did nothing but bring harm to his family?
What choice did he have?
But remember, you chose this, Kiryu.
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stan: do ford1 and ford2 have actual names? …are those actually their names?
ford: there’s only two of us, so we never needed to come up with names for ourselves. ford1 and ford2 are purely for your convenience, and they’re based off who came first
stan: oh…wait, if ford1 came first, why doesn’t he ever show up by himself? he’s always either with ford2 or ford2’s manning everything by himself
ford: you know when a shy child gets taken to school for the first time and they’re scared of everything so they hide behind their parent the entire time?
stan: yeah?
ford: that’s ford1
stan: oh. how do i…help ford1 not be scared
ford: it’s been nearly fifty years, i don’t know if you can help him not be scared at this point
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outer-edges · 1 year
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bruh apparently my roommate fell down the terf pipeline this summer and proudly told me she is a terf tonight. uh. babe what the fuck do you want me to do with that.
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szappan · 9 months
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also today me and an exchange student i became tentative but earnest friends with over the semester realised we're probably never going to see each other again it's all so strange how quickly you can start missing people
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wilsonpussyindulgence · 8 months
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man i thought i had the worst travel related breakup. i went on a cross country trip with my gf in 2017 only to be dumped before we even made it out of seattle where we were starting (i live on the east coast of the us). getting cheated on during a trip abroad and while planning to move in together... thats some next level shit
TUMBLR ASKS STILL SUCK SO I DIDN'T SEE THIS UNTIL TWO WEEKS AFTER IT WAS SENT
but thank you, that's just the sparknotes of the fucked up shit that guy did to me, lmaooooo. i don't even think i've laid them all out for one person because it's genuinely So. Embarrassing.
i gotta admit though, getting broken up with right after flying to visit but before actually doing the trip is pretty good too (and by good, i mean bad. horrendous. literally what the fuck, actually)
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bluebellhairpin · 2 years
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me before t*itter users came to tumblr:
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me, now they're here:
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kylewalker-peters · 2 years
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Okay goodnight I’m going to dream of a good tottenham that actually wins things
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dordey · 5 months
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🕰️
#thinking on how ??? visceral it is to visit ancestors' graves (& it goes without saying how fortunate i am to visit them)#this person contributed to my own personhood. but they were a person too long before i existed. their purpose here was their own#not to eventuate in me. they went through things i could never fathom & will never experience#they had their own thoughts & feelings & bled & cried & made decisions that impacted them & their families forever#their bones are mouldering in the ground under my feet. a part of me is in the earth here. right here. forever tying me to this place#died so long ago maybe even those bones are dust by now#but they're still living through me & they're still so alive to me even though i'm standing in front of their tombstone#so many questions i want to ask like was it scary coming here & what's it like to die & do you know me do you love me am i anybody to you#what were your grandparents like what was your wedding like what did you feel when your children were born did you worry for them?#& your grandchildren & your great grandchildren & your tenth generation great grandchildren? did you worry for us & our futures?#could you even fathom that parts of you would exist to stand in front of your grave 200 years later?#& can't say anything to them even though i want to#please love me like i love you. please help me gain some purpose and meaning tied to something bigger than myself#please tell me everything will be okay & the decisions i'm making are the right ones & that you're proud of me#in it tonight lads (":
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tojisun · 2 months
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the apple that rolled over to the tree
!! fluff; f!reader; parenthood!!; simon-centric hehe >:3 // divider by @/plutism!
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there is a… kid attached to your hip when simon returns home from a mission, his exhausted body stumbling into the kitchen where he finds you and it.
“what—”
he can’t even fathom the emotion coursing through him at the moment, what with shock triumphing over everything. still, you’d probably need to give him credit for not losing his goddamn mind at seeing a whole child — he couldn’t have been more than two years old with how he’s only three apples tall — clinging to you like a baby koala.
“oh my god, you’re back!” you squeal, unfazed at how dumbfounded your fiance has become, before shuffling close to embrace him.
simon reciprocates the hug anyway.
you step back, your lips still wobbling in your tears as you stare up at him, all awed like you couldn’t believe that he was back and simon wishes he can press his promises to your lips because he will always find a way to come back, he swears on his life, but also—
the child.
“sweetheart?” he begins, soft as to not spook you or the kid. “who’s, uh, who’s that?”
the child shifts, turning his little face from where it was burrowed onto your neck at the sound of simon’s voice. he rests his head on your clavicle, smooshing his already chubby cheek, before the biggest brown eyes that simon’s ever seen stare up at him, all doe-eyed and jarringly innocent, and simon, he—
well, not even babysitting tommy’s kids prepared him for this.
“this is yasha,” you murmur, pulling simon’s attention back to you. “or yakov, or james if he would want an english name.”
the boy reacts to you calling his name, and simon watches as those curious eyes tip up at you in question. you swipe your finger over his nose, the little thing scrunching up at the ticklish feeling, and simon becomes breathless at seeing the unadulterated joy in your face.
it is all parts soft and tender, but also anxious and worried, and simon begins to puzzle out the pieces.
“he’s my foster child. or ours, i guess, now that you’re here.” your voice is so fragile as you reply to him, your hand now beginning to rub soothing nothings on the boy’s back. simon wonders if it’s more to calm yourself down than it is to comfort the boy.
your lips purse, hesitating, and simon waits because while he he’s pieced out what you want to ask, he knows that this is something you would want to truly talk to him about. it is something he knows you have mustered up the courage to bring up so he gives it to you, open and ready, and he hopes that his face and his gait show that whatever it is you would want to say, simon will always support you no matter what.
“si?” you begin, looking heart-wrenchingly small in your worry. “i think i wanna adopt him.”
simon hums, stepping close but also being careful not to crowd yasha, before he curls his arms around you two — his family — and nuzzles his face on your other shoulder. “i’d love that.”
he offers you a smile, and squeezes your arm in comfort, then he watches as the tears come, easily springing up from your eyes. yasha startles, whirling to look up at his mother in worry. simon’s throat constricts at the thought of you being a mother and him, a father; how, now, there is someone else for simon to come home to. someone to fight for.
jesus. he’d need to tell the lads and maybe get wasted as a celebration.
“owies?” yasha asks, chubby fist balling your shirt.
“they’re happy tears, sweetie pie,” you reply, crooning. “i’m just so, so happy.”
yasha hums, nodding, probably already distracted, and simon takes that time to straighten back up. he pushes your hair away from your face, before he pitches forward to press a kiss on your forehead.
yeah, he’s happy too.
.
yasha gets spoiled, not that simon’s complaining given that he’s been the one doing all the spoiling.
“really, si? a new toly?” you ask, arms crossed over your chest in your exasperation.
toly or anatoly, or tory because yasha still can’t speak properly, is the name that yasha gave to all of his new stuffed toys. it all started with a dog plush that simon bought from the supermarket on a whim and gave to the boy. it was laughably quick how yasha had abandoned his blocks to make grabby hands to the toy, before squealing out that name.
the next stuffed toy that yasha received, which was just the softest and roundest penguin plush toy that simon’s ever seen, was also named toly. so was that teddy bear you bought for him. or that reindeer he got for christmas. somehow, every single one had been named toly.
the only thing you and simon can find about toly was that anatoly means sunrise. simon was so sure it was the russian word for animal, because why else would yasha repeat it, but who would have thought that their little fish is so imaginative?
like, of course he’s going to name all of his toys toly because they are as warm as sunrises. see? smart kid.
but this one, this new toly, set off world records. it was a camel plush that simon saw at the airport when he was out, pretending to be a civilian.
(garrick had been assigned with him for that mission, and was quick to spot and mention simon’s on-duty purchase.
“it’s for my boy,” he grunted in reply, forgetting the fact that he’s yet to truly break the news to his squad. garrick had never looked as surprised, and next thing simon knew, the news made its way to their group chat.
price was amiable about the whole thing. mactavish? not so much.
he just about begged to see a picture of yasha — “and yer girl again, if you wouldn’t mind.” — or even visit him. then he invited garrick to come and price invited himself too, so now the guys are going to swing by some time soon.)
when simon gave it to yasha, their boy had stared at it for a solid minute — simon counted — before screaming and then running to snatch the toy from simon’s hold. he hugged the camel close to his person, his little head nuzzling against the plush face of the camel, all the while absolutely vibrating in unabashed excitement.
he picked up thundering footsteps and turned around just enough to see you literally slide into the room. yasha continued to hug the camel, ignorant of the distress he caused, while you looked on in your panic, buzzing with worry because you just heard your boy scream, damn it!
“he’s fine, bub,” simon said before you could ask, and he watched as you came down from your frenzy, your breathing slowing down at the rationalization that if simon was not panicked, then everything’s alright.
then, your eyes landed on the new stuff toy.
“really?” you asked.
in his defence, yasha adores camel-toly.
in your defence, yasha’s room is running out of space for his tolys.
…well, simon does have all that military money. gonna have to spend it on something else, right?
.
[charlie foxtrot]
sriley: link
john2: ????
sriley: new address.
garry: oh? congratulations.
sriley: thanks.
johnp: 👍
.
yasha was shy when saying hi to price, then outright cried when he saw mactavish, which made simon bark out loud in laughter. yasha only stopped sniffling when he saw kyle. in no time, yasha absolutely adored garrick to the point that he would not even let him go.
dinner was prepared and while you called them all to eat, simon ambled out of the kitchen, where he had been helping you, and walked towards kyle and yasha to pick up his son and seat him on his high chair. but yasha had only looked at him, his head tilted in question, before ignoring simon and clinging onto kyle.
hell, he had even let go of camel-toly so that he could use two chubby fists to hold onto kyle. surprised, simon didn’t even know how to react and watched as his sergeant offered him an apologetic smile before carrying his son to the dining room. kyle rounded the table and sat yasha on his high chair, only, yasha made a scene when kyle did so, and he released a lungful of screams and cries, breaking everyone’s eardrums and their hearts.
kyle stood there, worried and confused, and hovered because he did not know what to do. hell, none of them did, and then you walked out of the kitchen, rushing to yasha, and hummed songs to comfort your son.
you crooned when he made grabby hands to be picked up and you did so with no hesitation, your touch soothing the boy into quiet sniffles. but even then, yasha wouldn’t settle down as he wriggled in your arms, short limbs reaching for—
simon glowered.
yasha was reaching for kyle. you were quick to giggle, asking kyle if it was alright that yasha would eat with him, and simon had glared at his sergeant, daring him to deny their son of anything, before reluctantly nodding his approval at kyle’s happy trill of, “of course, ma’am!”
yasha had finally calmed down when you sat him on kyle’s lap, and his boy was even polite enough to actually eat his soft veggies every time kyle beckoned him to open his mouth for a new spoonful.
simon did not startle, but it was close, when your hand landed on his thigh.
“you okay, baby?” you asked, eyes furrowed in your worry.
“yeah,” he remembers replying with, his throat all choked-up because he knows yasha must be excited to have new people to play with, but still, there was something that stung when his boy chose garrick over him.
not that it was kyle’s fault because he is a dear for even doing all that he did for yasha, but simon had hoped that he would always be yasha’s favourite.
too lost in his thoughts, simon had almost missed yasha’s call.
“-ddy? daddy?” yasha asked, startling simon.
it was not the first time yasha called him that, but every time he did, it never fails to make simon melt.
“yeah? what’s up, buddy?”
simon pretended that no one was watching the interaction.
yasha giggled, hiding his food-smeared lips behind his little palms, before turning to use garrick’s front to hide from simon. you snorted, murmuring to kyle how you swear you would wash his shirt before they go, but it’s all buzz to simon because his son — his darling boy — wanted to play with him during dinner.
yasha peeked at him again, before giggling once more when he caught simon’s eyes. this continued on until dinner ended, with simon occasionally miming growling monsters to induce more hearty giggles from his son, and being rewarded with the happiest laughter ever.
simon turned to you, with his heart on his throat, and beamed.
“aww,” mactavish sang from somewhere beside him. “ain’t that adorable— argh!”
simon had swung his arm out and thumped his fist on johnny’s stomach. thank god, yasha had chosen that time to hide his face again on kyle’s stomach.
.
“unca’ john?” yasha asks in a stage-whisper because everyone within earshot just heard him even with his attempt to be quiet. it’s only their training that stopped simon from acting like he’s noticed.
“yeah, bubsy?” john replies, sounding so utterly soft that this version of him is so foreign to simon.
“this tory,” yasha says and simon discreetly peeks to see which toly is being introduced to uncle john — it’s the elephant one.
price gasps theatrically like he hadn’t seen yasha drool all over this elephant toy before, and puffs out, “how cute!”
“mhmm,” yasha says, nodding, then smacks the face of the toy on john’s face. the trunk smooshes against john’s nose, and thank god that elephant-tory is soft because that aim would have been lethal if it wasn’t.
“jesus—” price gasps out.
“language!” simon hisses, and ducks his head back down just before yasha could catch him peeking.
.
yasha is now four and he still gets teary eyed when he sees johnny. simon placates his friend and says it’ll pass soon. maybe.
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basically, i wanted to write a fic wherein simon’s reaction to being presented with a child is “what— oh okay, sure why not” and (literally in 20 minutes) “i will kill everything for this child” and so here we are
a simon spinoff - it takes a rampage (to be a dad)
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infizero · 10 months
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OH MY FUCKIGN GOD JIMMY
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We had one of Steff's comedian friends staying with us on the weekend, lovely lad called Sam from Singapore. He had never been to Wales before, and he requested that we take him to a Welsh restaurant so he could try Welsh food
That's surprisingly difficult, actually. Like a lot of Welsh culture, our culinary traditions have not exactly been applauded over the years, so you don't really see them. But a lucky Google search revealed a brand new one has just opened in SA1 called the Welsh House, so great! Away we went.
Fuck me, they went all in.
It wasn't just the menu (though fuck me, what a menu - one of their 'for the table to share' options was little mini leek and cheddar Welsh cakes with salted butter and they were paralysingly good). It wasn't just that every alcohol was Welsh, even including the wine (surprisingly good btw, called 'Naturiol'.)
The table centerpieces were daffodils. All signs for the toilets were Welsh only. The walls had photos of Wales, modern and historical; the windows had the fleur de lis; the specials board (pork belly in Welsh cider and damson sauce with honey and wild garlic glazed carrots) had dragons on. I realise this is probably normal for country-themed restaurants, but I've never been to one for Wales before.
But the best bit, see, was the music
I clocked, when we walked in, that they were playing If You Tolerate This Then Your Children Will Be Next by the Manic Street Preachers (you always clock the Manics). Ah, I thought. A Welsh song! In a Welsh restaurant! Ho ho ho.
As they seated us, it became What's New Pussycat. Ah! I thought. Another Welsh song! Fu fu fu.
Then they played Monster by the Automatic and I was like my god are they only playing Welsh music?? That's so cool! What an eclectic mix that's going to be. We should suggest to them they should look into Welsh language music too, really mix it up.
And then they played Anrheoli by Yws Gwynedd and lads, Steff and I lost our shit. We lost our fucking shit. Sam's sitting there, utterly bewildered. The staff are nervously edging away from us. We don't care. It's the first time I have ever heard a Welsh language song played outside of a Welsh language setting. We're so excited.
"They're playing Welsh music!!!" says Steff. "Holy shit!!!"
"Imagine if they played Sebona Fi!" I say, humorously.
"Nah," says Steff. "You can't in a restaurant. There'd be a riot, it's faerie music."
"...what?" says Sam
We explain the cultural phenomenon that is Sebona Fi. The song changes: Primadonna Girl, by Marina and the Diamonds.
"She's Welsh??" says Sam.
"She's from Abergavenny!" we beam.
"I don't know what that means," nods Sam, who is from Singapore.
Next: The Bartender and the Thief, by the Stereophonics. We're in high spirits. The extraordinarily Welsh wine arrives, as does the rarebit on sourdough starter. Sam, a gay man, delightedly orders the faggots and peas.
They play Ben Rhys by Gwilym Bowen Rhys, and we lose our shit again. Sam is now used to this, because comedians are adaptable. "They even have daffodils!" I say, misty eyed. "Is that relevant?" Sam asks, fascinated.
They play Hiraeth, by PLU. Hard to explain that one. Very hard to explain the effect it has when it's played in a restaurant, but Sam looks around the suddenly muted room and whispers "Are we in church?"
"It's about Hiraeth," whispers Steff. "So kind of."
Next: the Masses Against the Classes, by the Manics. Utter tonal whiplash. This playlist is not remotely restaurant appropriate. It's perfect.
"You'd think they'd pick like... a genre," Sam says dreamily. "We just went from church to the barricades."
The faggots arrive. "I forgot it would be a western sized portion," Sam says morosely, of what to me is a normal sized plate of food. He tries one, and brightens.
They play Sebona Fi.
The place erupts.
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5sospenguinqueen · 26 days
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He’s Just Ken - Lando Norris x Volleyball! Reader
Summary: Lando tries to tell the Grid that he's dating an Olympic Volleyball player but instead, they publicly accuse him of lying to them.
Warnings: None? Swearing. Fluff.
Requested: Yes by Anon (here)
2024 season, slightly skewed timeline haha
Face claim is Jordan Thompson but also rando pinterest pics used. American Volleyball player to fit in with 'the twist'
F1 Masterlist
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landonorris just posted
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landonorris non-race weekends mean quality time with my trophy and watching the olympics opening ceremony 
2,004 comments
maxfewtrell don’t objectify me like that. i’m more than just your trophy 
→ landonorris you wish you were my trophy 
teamusa can we count on your support?
→ user1 um, he’s british so no..?
logansargeant looking forward to volleyball
→ landonorris absolutely
→ oscarpiastri it’s just sad now
→ user2 he’s not allowed to enjoy volleyball?
georgrussell63 look, guys, he’s trying to act like a wag 
→ alex_albon okay, moving this to social media is a step too far, mate
→ charles_leclerc c’mon, let him have his delusions. he’s not hurting anyone but himself 
→ landonorris they’re not delusions! 
→ user3 what is this about???
mclaren one of our favourite pictures 
→ oscarpiastri can we get him some mandated therapy?
→ landonorris i’m not mentally unwell! 
ynln_usa just posted
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ynln_usa and i thought i looked good. let’s hear a little commotion for ms. eiffel 
3,481 comments
teammate1 okay but you do look good. nothing looks better than team pride
→ ynln_usa AMERICAAAAA 🦅🇺🇸
→ user4 i love how unhinged she is
user5 what is lando doing in the likes 
→ user6 logan is also here
→ user7 yes because she’s a usa volleyball player and he’s patriotic af. lando makes no sense  
→ user8 logan follows the usa volleyball insta account
logansargeant good luck 🇺🇸 liked by ynln_usa
→ user9 this interaction has my whole heart. my two favourite (and only) american athletes 
→ user10 yn and logan meet when?
teamusa that’s our girl! 
→ georgerussell63 lando’s imaginary girl
→ oscarpiastri like he could get her, she’s tall and he’s him (this comment thread has been deleted)
landonorris good luck on your first match
→ user11 sit down vroom vroom boy, not going to happen
→ user12 ha, like lando could bag the volleyball goddess. she’s a real athlete 
→ alex_albon the people have spoken
Group chat texts Twitch Boys + 2023 babies 
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ynln_usa just posted
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liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and others
ynln_usa first match down. my thighs are chafed and my voice all yelled out but i am pumped! 
4,416 comments
logansargeant what a game! looking forward to the rest of the season
→ ynln_usa thanks for the support 
user1 now oscar’s joined the group of drivers following her
→ user2 and charles
→ user3 poor logan can’t gatekeep her anymore
oscarpiastri looks intense 
→ ynln_usa says the extreme driver 
georgerussell63 lads, what’re we thinking
→ alex_albon just further reinforces our point
→ charles_leclerc she looks very cool
→ user4 what are they all doing here
→ user5 why are they all being suspicious
→ user6 nothing better to do on a weekday? 
landonorris i’ve never seen the stars and stripes look so good
→ danielricciardo norizz is back again
→ landonorris don’t you start 
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oscarpiastri just posted
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oscarpiastri lando’s dragging us to the olympics to feed into his delusion
2,814 comments
landonorris i’m not lying! 
user7 anyone else notice that all of the drivers in paris at the moment have been focusing on the usa women’s volleyball team?
→ user8 alex and george both posted this match, and their pic included player 12 as well??
→ user9 put some respect on yn ln’s name
danielricciardo where was my invite?
→ carlossainz55 and mine?
→ landonorris neither of you have publicly called me a liar. this isn’t a fun little trip. this is me proving a point! 
→ danielricciardo so it’s a holiday out of spite?
→ charles_leclerc we are having a great time though
alex_albon i’m willing to go along with his delusions if it gets me more free holidays 
→ logansargeant me too
→ georgerussell63 lads, no. we were supposed to be staging on intervention. i made a powerpoint 
landonorris i hate all of you
mclaren bring us back a croissant 
→ oscarpiastri only if you can find me a sane teammate 
→ mclaren deal
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ynln_usa just posted
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ynln_usa luckily, i look better in silver than gold 
16,812 comments
ynln_usa on a serious note, i am blown away by the immense support i have received this olympic season. a massive thank you to the loml @/landonorris for being at the finals (and bringing along some friends) i could hear you screaming in the stands
→ user10 excuse me!! loml lando norris?? since, uh when
teamusa a silver medal and a hard launch. what a day for our champion
→ ynln_usa help, i’ve been captured by a bunch of men who drive in circles
→ teammate any of them single?
landonorris you look so cute with your medal! my olympic silver medalist, everyone 
user11 i feel like this isn’t reaching enough people because all of the comments are just congratulating her on a silver medal. where are the people freaking out about the pinned comment? 
→ user12 she won a silver freaking medal. that’s more impressive than dating someone below her league 
lilymhe i was on the edge of my seat the whole time! congratulations, girly 🥈 (alex facetimed me the whole time so i could watch the match)
→ ynln_usa you mean, lando didn’t give you a ticket? i’ll tell him off for you
→ landonorris how many times do i have to tell people? i didn’t invite them for a nice trip. i was proving a point! it was a petty trip
→ user13 one hell of a trip 
landonorris @/oscarpiastri @/charles_leclerc @/georgerussell63 @/alex_albon @/logansargeant read the caption, boys 
charles_leclerc amazing match
oscarpiastri what a game! 
logansargeant fuck yeah! USA! 
georgerussell63 i’ve never been so invested in a volleyball match before 
alex_albon well done, team usa
user14 the f1 drivers are being so polite. it’s adorable 
landonorris just posted
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liked by logansargeant, maxfewtrell and others 
landonorris my baby won silver 🩶🪙
3,304 comments
user1 okay but that picture in front of the eiffel tower. slay 
→ oscarpiastri thank you. some of my best work
→ user2 oscar.png when?
→ landonorris it’s only a good pic because he had good models 
→ oscarpiastri *model. she’s barbie, you’re just ken
ynln_usa big wins for us both this year
→ landonorris you’re my biggest win
→ danielricciardo cringe  liked by ynln_usa
→ landonorris stop it. i saw that, sweetheart
carlossainz55 you used to call me baby…
→ ynln_usa do you want him back?
→ landonorris babe, wtf
→ ynln_usa i’m sorry but carlos is my fave driver and i don’t want him to be sad
→ landonorris dumped.
charles_leclerc okay we get it now. we’re sorry we doubted you
→ georgerussell63 yeah. please stop making out in front of us 
→ landonorris vengeance! 
→ ynln_usa have you not learnt that he’s petty yet? he dragged you all to paris just to prove he was dating me
alex_albon her silver medal is far cooler than your miami trophy 
→ landonorris i agree but shouldn’t you be nice to me like the others?
→ alex_albon no. i never outwardly said i didn’t believe you, just that she was out of your league 
→ ynln_usa thank you, alex. it’s amazing what men can do if they make you laugh 
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Bonus
logansargeant just posted
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ynln_usa from toddler terror to olympic silver medalist, you’ve been a pain in my ass since we were kids, and i couldn't be prouder to watch you win big 🇺🇸🍾 tagged: ynln_usa
2,302 comments 
ynln_usa the childhood best friends to professional athletes pipeline is real
landonorris so you knew i was telling the truth the entire time! 
→ logansargeant yeah
→ landonorris why didn’t you tell the others!
→ logansargeant was funny 
oscarpiastri i’m sorry but this reveal is even better than finding out lando was telling the truth about dating yn
→ user3 wait, so all these comments were because they didn’t believe he was dating yn
→ alex_albon would you have until their recent posts?
→ user4 no tbf
charles_leclerc you sly dog! you let us bully him for no reason
→ logansargeant it’s what he gets for just trying to casually slip it into conversation and not introducing her like a gentleman should 
→ landonorris i brought usa volleyball themed cupcakes! 
georgerussell63 this is the best thing i’ve seen all year 
mclaren you’ve caused both our drivers to need a lot of therapy. we’ll send the bill your way 
→ ynln_usa it’s alright, i’ll cover it. i have to deal with them untherapised otherwise
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A/N: So, sorry, Anon. It wasn't until I'd written this up and then realised I'd completely left Max out of it. So sorry but hope you still enjoy!
As always, request open!
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