#what a delight to see him do his thing on stage what a joy

[hongberries]

⋆✧ Hui ♡ 흠뻑 (240118) ✧⋆

[anantaru]

— cute things they do unintentionally

including wriothesley, zhongli, neuvillette, diluc x gn! reader

꒰ genre ꒱ — fluff, established relationship, neck kisses, lots of physical affection

— wriothesley + always walks closest to the street

in the early stages of your relationship, wriothesley has shown the first, out of the many following, indications of his overall protective nature towards you— and do not misunderstand him, because obviously he wasn't making it somewhat overbearing.

he knows you are capable of doing things on your own, but he wants to be the one who does them for you instead. it fills him with joy, and the duke finds himself squeezing his eyes shut, indulging in the memories and thoughts and hope that they would never cease to invade his newfound paradise.

so to speak, it's sort of a way to show you his love in a contrasting kind of sense other than telling you his affection through words or physical touch— with his heart-melting gestures and tender warmth, wriothesley will stop to walk for a split second before softly pulling you farthest from the street as he walks closest.

it was silly— and romantic, and there's a drop of silence before you hear him hum in merriment, his eyes sparkling like the stars.

full of feeling, your cheeks were poignant of a flaming prickle, your whole body burned like fire at his touch as you eagerly listen to what story your boyfriend was telling you about, his smile bringing you the most lustrous light when you entangle your fingers into his arm to press his frame against you.

and suddenly, your lips are tingling with the desire to kiss him, his lips as pink as pink delights. what's the sweetest part about it all was that wriothesley wasn't doing any of this intentionally— in fact, it had always come down to the way he has been all of his life, protective and sheltering, benevolent to the people closest to his heart.

— zhongli + kisses your forehead whenever you meet

"hello, my love," zhongli's face lights up the moment he sees you, and it's a lot more personal by how particularly he smiled at you— because before catching your frame in midst the busy streets of liyue, his facial features were stern and a little frozen, although when he finally finds you, he smiles and it takes away his cold instantly, a slow upturn of his mouth revealing small dimples around his sides.

"i missed you," he admits, and zhongli moves closer before capturing your cheeks in his warm palms, planting a subtle kiss on your forehead as he presses you against his chest firmly— his golden eyes bright enough to make even broken glass glow and shimmer like a treasure on its own again.

you mumble out through a chain of muffled words at the slightly tight embrace of your boyfriend, "i missed you too," and listlessly wrap your arms around his waist, "in fact, i missed you more," you tease as he presses dozen of little kisses on your head.

as much as zhongli would love to hug you for what he sought out to be eternity, he knows he cannot remain like this forever, at least not while being crowded by the people of liyue— although pondering about it more deeply, he figured that theoretically speaking, he could be able to hug you from day to night without letting you go, but people might start looking at you both so that'll be a negative and turn things uncomfortable.

"you know it's impossible for you to miss me more?" he slowly pulls you off his chest before pinching your cheek, "i long for you day and night," as his grin shines in tandem with the dancing joy of his eyes, unable to tear their focus away from you.

— neuvillette + can't stop worshipping you

after a long, arduous day consisting of responsibilities, you plopped onto the giant, comfortable bed you shared with neuvillette before you felt the mattress slightly dip under the added weight of his body as he climbs over to lean one arm around your frame.

as he does this, his face instantly burns into the nook of your neck before he begins to caress it— obviously in those moments he was content with you, starting with a handful of soft, warm kisses until he could feel you smile, or notice your body heat raise.

it's pretty clear his senses were sharp, you cannot hide anything from your boyfriend, even if you tried.

you yawn out, opening your arms for his body to properly nestle in before wrapping your limbs around his frame to keep him close, "what did i do to deserve this?" you whisper sarcastically, squeezing him a little tighter into you, "is something the matter?"

neuvillette hums deeply before smothering one hand from your chest to your hips, his lips stretching into a lazy smile, creating a swirling haven on his handsome face, "nothing at all, everything is fine," he assures you with another kiss, his hot breath fanning over the dampened skin on your neck.

basking into the comfortable engage of your arms around his frame, he continues, "i have simply missed what's mine, that is all,"

"and you deserve this," you hear him mumble, "each and every day to be admired and loved,"

he places a kiss on your shoulder, the softness of his lips compelling, "i want to give you this," as he slowly continues to slide his lips over your collarbone, full of passionate crescendos.

your skin trembles and goosebumps arise on your neck as you unwind to his skilled. tender interludes, precisely in neuvillette taking care of you, shooting you a gentle smile before he searches for your lips next.

— diluc + likes to hold your hand all the time

it doesn't matter where the both of you were or what activity you participated in, because for neither diluc nor you this was something out of the ordinary anymore and began to become a necessity— like breathing, he required your touch, and his heart fluttered every time he felt your energy invade his.

your laugh was his favorite sound and your voice was the last tune he needed to hear before he'd close his eyes, always awaiting the flicker of longing in your caress.

but before you have found each other in this relationship, the master of the dawn winery has never considered himself to be an overly touchy individual, in fact, he was everything else but pleased whenever someone would become way too comfortable with him and overstep any boundaries.

what's funny about love is that how fast it can change things in someone— beyond looks, touches or shared smiles, there were feelings that only you two were able to understand.

diluc hadn't realized how easy and effortless it can be the moment you meet your soulmate, it's transparent and pure and you cannot get enough of them, it's useless to even try and you want to feel them again and again, until their warmth swathes through your skin and intertwines like dancers in a ballet.

in the beginning, it had started with quick and easy placements of his palm on your back or around your shoulders, but after a while, diluc wanted to turn it a little more intimate— he didn't say anything or mention it to you, but one day at a silent night in mondstadt, when he looked at you, really looked at you, he held your hand, his thumb tracing your knuckles in a silent confession of love and affirmation.

to diluc ragnvindr, the act of falling in love was the acknowledgement that he was in the presence of someone so special that it aches his heart, a journey with unexpected twists and turns— for the first time and in that moment, he knew that you were deserving of love to the fullest, without holding back.

©2024 anantaru do not repost, copy, translate, modify, claim as your own

[solxamber]

I love your stories 🥰 they’re so cute. Can I request Malleus Tsum and his S/O’s Tsum dropping in for a visit, but these Tsum’s are from the future so they bring their little Tsum offspring to show off to their non-Tsum counterparts, and the diasomnia crew.

Visited by your Tsums! - Malleus x reader

I loved this ask, its adorable!

The first sign that today was going to be anything but normal was the soft plop you heard at your feet. You looked down to see something small, round, and suspiciously familiar.

“Malleus?” you blinked. "Why are you… tiny?"

At your feet stood a tiny, Tsum version of Malleus, his beady eyes staring back at you as if this were the most normal thing in the world. You were just about to reach down when—plop—your Tsum counterpart appeared right next to him, and before you could even process that, three more Tsums—small, round, and suspiciously dragon-like—plopped right down between them.

“Malleus!” you squawked, eyes wide. “Why do we have Tsum kids?!”

Real-Malleus (the non-Tsum version) was beside you in an instant, looking as bewildered as you felt but also… ridiculously happy? He knelt beside the tiny family, eyes practically glowing. “It appears we’ve been visited… by our future.”

“You mean our future Tsums. With… our Tsum kids,” you added, still trying to wrap your mind around what was happening. “How do Tsums even reproduce?”

Just as Malleus was about to respond, Lilia swooped in, his eyes lighting up at the sight. “Grandchildren!” he squealed, sweeping up the tiny Tsum-children in his hands like they were the most precious things in the world. “Oh, this is wonderful! Look at their little wings! And their tiny horns! I knew this day would come, but not so soon!”

“Grandchildren?!” you yelped, cheeks burning. “Lilia, wait a second—Malleus and I only just started dating!”

Lilia, completely ignoring your flustered protests, was already cradling the Tsum babies like a doting grandfather, eyes misty with joy. “Oh, they’re perfect! Look at these little faces! I always knew you two would make beautiful children!”

You felt your face heat up as you glanced at Malleus, who was watching the scene with an expression that could only be described as giddy.

“Isn’t it wonderful?” Malleus said, voice soft but tinged with awe. “Our future looks… very promising.”

You could only blink at him, your brain short-circuiting. “We’re not even close to that stage yet!”

“Perhaps not,” Malleus mused, “but the future clearly holds… delightful things.”

Before you could respond, Sebek stormed in, his face torn between utter disbelief and something bordering on reverence. “WHAT IS THIS?!” he bellowed, pointing an accusatory finger at the Tsums. “ARE THOSE… LORD MALLEUS’S CHILDREN?!”

“Well, not technically children—they’re more like… future-Tsum-offspring,” you tried to explain, but Sebek’s brain had already short-circuited.

“I… I don’t understand! How could—A HUMAN?! WITH MY LORD?!” Sebek wailed, torn between his intense loyalty to Malleus and his confusion over the fact that his beloved Lord had apparently made mini-Tsum children with a human.

Lilia, still blissfully ignoring the chaos, began bouncing the Tsum babies in his arms. “Don’t you just love it, Sebek? Grandchildren already! They’re perfect, just like I imagined!”

“GRANDCHILDREN?!” Sebek practically choked, his voice hitting a pitch that was probably illegal in most regions. “But—Lord Malleus—human—children—I—I DON’T KNOW HOW TO FEEL!”

“I think it’s lovely,” Silver commented from his spot in the corner, looking half-asleep but clearly entertained. “Though… are they going to stay for dinner?”

You stared at the Tsums, then at Malleus, and then back at the Tsums. “Is this… like a sneak peek of our future? Is that what this is?”

Tsum-you and Tsum-Malleus both bobbed their heads as if to say, yes, of course.

Malleus, positively glowing with excitement, bent down to inspect the tiny offspring, his voice full of awe. “Our children… They take after you,” he said softly, turning to you with a fond smile.

Your heart did a little flip, and you rubbed the back of your neck, trying to fight the urge to melt on the spot. “Yeah, but… we’re not even—y’know—there yet.”

“True,” Malleus mused, but his smile didn’t fade. “But I look forward to that day.”

Lilia, meanwhile, was already planning the family reunion, holding up one of the Tsum-children like Simba “Sebek, take a look! Your Lord’s legacy! His tiny, adorable legacy!”

Sebek, still torn between utter confusion and blind loyalty, managed to sputter out, “Lord Malleus’s children… even if they’re Tsums… Oh my god, it’s my Lord’s children.” His voice dropped to a whisper, and he sank to one knee in reverence.

You couldn’t help but laugh at the sight, shaking your head. “This is the weirdest day of my life.”

“And yet,” Malleus said, stepping closer to you, “I find myself… delighted.”

You glanced up at him, still flustered but starting to feel the warmth of his excitement. “Yeah, I guess it’s… kinda cute.”

Malleus leaned in, his voice a low, rumbling whisper. “One day, we’ll have our own family. I look forward to it.”

You flushed, but you couldn’t help the grin that spread across your face. “Guess we’ll just have to wait and see, huh?”

Tsum-you and Tsum-Malleus squeaked in agreement, as they bounced happily between their future offspring.

“Well,” you said, giving the tiny family one last look, “if this is what the future holds… I guess it doesn’t look so bad after all.”

Masterlist

[riseoftheangstywriter]

How do u think the turtles would react if s/o got the turtles their favorite franchise(Jupiter Jim or Lou jitsu) merch after they attempted to buy it(but they were broke)?

Love this idea! I plan on writing a little scenario for each of the rise turts but part 1 will just be Mikey and Donnie(part 2 coming soon), enjoy!!

Mikey

You're guided through the lair by the heavenly aroma that could only be the result of Mikeys' incredible baking. It was truly a delight to see whatever he was whipping up when you managed to stop by at just the right time.

You practically float into the kitchen, the box turtle in the middle of pulling a tray out of the oven.

"Something sweet?" You hum, watching as his surprise melts into joy at the sight of you, smile matching his grin. You've mistaken it for the sun more than once.

"More like someone sweet." He removes his oven mitts and meets you halfway in a tight hug. "I made brownies y/n!" The syllables of your name slip fondly from his tongue, his enthusiasm enveloping you with warmth.

His head fits right in the crook of your neck, his usual resting spot in an embrace such as this. He smells like chocolate. Feels like home.

"I have something for you." Unable to contain your secret any longer, you pull away, presenting him with a bag, orange tissue paper loosely sticking out.

His eyes light up, fingers dancing in anticipation at whatever this thing might be. "Really?!"

All you can do is nod, holding your breath as he takes it from you, tearing through the packaging with that contagious unconfined energy you adored.

You know the exact moment he sees what it is, his jaw dropping in time with your gleeful giggle. Your hand covers your face, unable to hold back the joyful sounds escaping your throat.

"Is this the limited edition Jupiter Jim cookbook? Which has all the food and beverages from the films and comics?!"

You nod, knowing he had been dying to get it whenever it had come out. Being such a niche piece of merchandise, it sold out almost immediately. Not to mention it wasn't exactly in his price range.

He was a good sport about not being able to add it to his growing collection, but seeing his crestfallen expression for even a second was all it took for you to decide you would stop at nothing to get it for him.

Now that you've gotten it, Mikey could-

"Woah!" Your feet leave the ground as you are lifted in the air, being twirled around multiple times. A reminder of his incredible strength despite his size.

"Ohmigosh y/n! This is incredible! You're incredible!" One hand cradles your face, his other arm wrapped around your waist, holding you up. "I love it!" He repeats multiple times, kissing your cheeks over and over. "I love you!"

"I-I love you too!" You manage to stutter out between the onslaught of pecks, dizzy and lovesick.

Planted back to reality, Mikey shakes your shoulders. "Do you have plans tomorrow? If not, I'm making a three course- no, a five course meal! I have to go shopping, I need to call April!"

"You have all the time in the world." You reply reassuringly, still endeared by his eagerness.

"I know, I know. It's just I've been wanting this for like forever!" He calms, now seeming to finally process what you've done. "...You remembered?"

How could you not? You're already far into that stage of wanting to know every little thing about him, and what you have learned was already committed to memory forever. You knew he was no mind reader; you just wanted to express yourself to him like he did to you. It mattered, really. Deeply.

"Of course." Simple and sweet words were enough for him to understand. He leans into you, your hand pressed against his plastron, tracing the sticker on its' surface.

"You're the best." He swears to you, like a promise he plans to never break.

What ensues next is a playful back and forth, ending in more laughter. Sunshine finds its' way in, even in the underground tunnels of New York.

He leaves you with the brownies, rounding up his family with an extra spring in his step. You take a bite of a corner piece; relishing in its sweetness, it being cooked to perfection as usual. Although it was nothing compared to Mikey's affection.

Not even close.

Donnie

Like clockwork, you arrive to Donnie's lab. A weekly cycle, but the farthest thing from a chore. A highlight seems like a more fitting description.

The doors open for you with a hiss, inviting to you while perhaps ominous to a stranger. His space, and now, in a way, yours too by association.

He's working. Focused. Diligent as ever. He's rarely been irked by your interruptions when they do occur, but out of respect you keep your distance. Besides, you didn't mind observing from afar. Or admiring.

He greets you, like always. The creaking of a nearby chair is indication of your "sitting down and vegging out on your phone after a long day time", so he doesn't shift his attention to you just yet. Wanting to complete his current task first.

You aren't on your phone, however. Instead, you wait patiently. Wanting to get his reaction whenever he sees... it.

It takes around fifteen minutes before you hear a satisfied sigh and a readjust of his googles. Then a pause, an empty space where his first words to you should be.

"..y/n?" He turns in his chair, eyes narrowed and an immaculate eyebrow quirked.

"Yes?" You mirror his questioning expression, feigning ignorance. An attempt to be cute, hoping to add to your charm that got him to fall for you, somehow.

"What did you put on my desk?" A harmless, even logical question; but you have a terrible poker face and are horrible at hiding when you're excited about something.

You focus on the subject of conversation. A gray box, with more height than width. Decorating it is a purple satin ribbon.

You look between it and him. "Oh that? I don't know. Maybe you should open it and see."

For a moment you're sure he'll question it, but to your delight he obliges to your initial request. Your stomach churns; that means he trusts you. That was great, amazing even. Yet..

Going by his side, you watch as he puts the package in his lap, slowly tugging on the fabric of the ribbon, letting it loosen so he can pull it away with ease.

His hands linger over the lid, a silent ask for permission in his subtle glance upwards.

"Well?" You say, sweaty palms concealed behind your back.

A huff in response, and the lid is popped off.

It's quiet for about a minute, Donnie peering inside the box, hands still firmly on its' sides. The suspense is gnawing at you, screaming internally for any reaction at all. Please.

Then he lifts it out, holding it carefully in his skilled fingers. The holy grail itself. An Atomic Lass figurine. Not just any figurine. It's Atomic Lass in her outfit from Jupiter Jim's Pluto Vacation IV, which just so happens to be his favorite film in the franchise. Not to mention this item was so hard to find, not even the soft shell himself could get it in his possession.

Biting your tongue so hard it might bleed, you try to piece together his thoughts by a thorough study of his expression. You knew how particular he was about his well-kept merchandise collection. You polished it yourself, only pleased once it shined like the titanium bust of his head. Desperate to impress him; even now, after all this time. Dreading what would happen if you managed to fail. Had you failed already?

He sets down the figure, staring at it. Then an exhale, as he squares his shoulders, facing you.

"How much do I owe you?"

What? "What? Nothing." That was the last thing you had expected him to say. Your gesture had no price tag, but feeling the need to elaborate just to bring the point home, you add. "Zero dollars."

His eyes are cast downwards, but it's unmistakable. He's thinking. Now you see. He's calculating how much it might have cost you. How many hours you worked at your job in order to pay for it. Classic Donnie overthink. You wouldn't allow that.

With purpose, you bend down to eye level, pressing a gentle kiss on the area between his pinched brows. "It's a gift, Donnie." Fingers meet his chin as you lift his head up. "You don't owe me anything."

It seems to have pained him, how easily you assured him no favor was needed, or even wanted by you. "No. No- you cannot possibly expect me to just take this," his fingers grasp your wrist, hand almost shaking. "This is too much."

His sweetness, yet hypocrisy is extremely adorable. "It is most certainly not. There's plenty of times we've been in this exact situation, just the other way around, and you know what you said every time I tried to repay you?"

Not really asking for an answer, you continue, "You say it's fine, and that your purpose of doing things for me is never to get something in return," you trace his jaw, feeling it clench. "It's the same thing for me."

Using his own principles against him was a killing blow, seeing his conflicting emotions settle into resignation, yet the apprehension was there. "I have no doubt it was difficult for you to find such rare..." He trails off, eyeing the statue and all its' details. "It's magnificent."

His breathless praise fuels your ego, just a bit. "I'm really really glad you think so." You kiss his cheek, pulling yourself out of his loosening grip.

With a surprised gasp he brings you right back in, kissing you with a sudden ferocity that makes your head spin and skin shimmer, a bubbling warmth threatening to boil over. The position you're in is a little awkward, but with Donnie's lips on yours like this you found no reason to complain.

"Please," Almost like a plea, his eyes rake over your contented smile, breath hitching. "Let- Let me do something for you. Anything."

The constant need Donnie had to help you stoked the embers in your heart even more. Falling impossibly further for him just when you think there couldn't possibly be anything else to love, to admire.

Your nose meets his snout with a meaningful nuzzle, and you caress a wrinkle on his forehead with a thumb. "Anything? Well... a movie right now sounds nice. If I may throw out a suggestion here, what are your opinions on Jupiter Jim's Pluto Vacation IV?"

Once he realizes the direction you were taking with his proposition, he scoffs, the familiar sound furthering your fond amusement. "Is that a serious request, y/n?"

"To be honest," you cup his cheek, seeing how youthful he looks like this. Wide eyes and shining pupils. "Just this is plenty, but if you actually feel like you have to repay me, which you don't... then yes, I'm serious."

He sighs into your touch, clearly wanting to argue your "request". That push and pull between you both was always fun to indulge in; but in this case, he accepts. "Very well, even though I do not consider that sufficient in the slightest." He could grumble all he wants, he knew you had succeeded.

Movie night commences shortly after, and you listen as he brainstorms how exactly he'll display his figurine, insistent just setting it alongside the others wasn't enough. Soaking up every word, you cuddle closer. You should surprise Donnie more often. You could get used to this.

[hannie-dul-set]

STAR STUDDED BAGGAGE [3].

SYNOPSIS. the saying “never meet your idols” exists for a reason. you just didn’t expect the reason to be because said idols would end up declaring that you’re their alleged lover from a past life (past lives, rather). now you have three big celebrities vying for your attention, and it’s not as dreamlike as you imagined it to be.

PAIRINGS. choi yeonjun, choi soobin, choi beomgyu x female! reader. GENRES. reincarnation! au, celebrity! au (soloist! yeonjun, actor! soobin, rock band member! beomgyu), slight college! au, slight historical! au, rom-com, angst, reverse harem woohoo. WARNINGS. swearing, talks about stalking, talks about death, data privacy violations, so much emotional whiplash yummy, a very long conversation, google dependent historical information. WORD COUNT. 6.3k.

NOTE. this chapter finally made its way out hell 😭😭😭 per usual, please let me know your thoughts on the chapter! a single comment on ao3 inspired me to finish this, so ur feedback really means a lot! enjoy<3

MASTERLIST | NEXT >

CHAPTER 3 — can we go back to being parasocial?

IF SOMEONE HEARS YOUR SUMMARY OF THE EVENTS THAT UNFOLDED WITHIN THE PAST FEW DAYS, they may accuse you of lying. Delusional, even. You’d think the same had you not been the center of it all— yet the proof is in your pockets. Your phone. In the album Choi Yeonjun failed to sign, stuffed inside your bag at the last minute before you left your apartment earlier.

The summary. Right. Yes.

“Can they stop sharing that video of Yeonjun excessively flirting with a fan?! I’m going to kill myself if I see it one more time.”

You were lucky enough to nab a fansign slot. But instead of getting Choi Yeonjun’s signature, you ended up getting a kiss of a hand instead, along with a scrawl of numbers on your album that you’re far too terrified to try to dial.

“Hey, send me our photo with Soobin the other day,” nudges Huening from beside you. “I’m gonna print it out and put it in a locket and use it as a family heirloom.”

You bumped into one of your favorite actors, Choi Soobin, in the middle of a late night convenience store run with your friends to fuel your group all nighter, stained his shirt with your ice cream, and got a photo with him in the process.

“By the way, have you called the business card yet? What are you gonna do with your broken phone screen?”

And Choi Beomgyu may or may not have professed his undying love for you, asked for your hand in marriage, and started crying in front of you in less than ten fucking minutes.

“She’s zoned out.”

The problem is, you can’t even bask in the delightful absurdity of it all because one common thread from all those three separate instances has been keeping you up for nights. It’s clawing at your brain, lingering in the back of your mind like an incessant stalker— which, mind you, is not a pleasant feeling when the very causes of such disturbance were once the bringers of joy and all things good in your otherwise meaningless life as a cog in the capitalist machinery that is society.

“Hello? Are you awake?”

Said problem being the fact that you’re pretty sure they all called you by your name at one point.

How the fuck do they know your name?

“I deleted Twitter. I Airdropped it to you. No, I have not called it yet. Now please let me think in peace.”

Crazy. This is all too crazy. In the first place, what are the odds that you bump into three celebrities within one week’s time? Is this some sort of prank, or something? Are those three filming a hidden camera show together? No, no. That couldn’t be because there’s no fucking way a company is sane enough to stage a risky hidden camera prank during a fansign knowing full well how obsessive and insane fans can get. You’re lucky your face wasn’t caught in any of the videos circulating online— video of you and Choi Yeonjun, mostly him, acting out a fucking sageuk. You’re lucky you haven’t been doxxed yet.

“Finish your sandwich,” Taehyun clicks his tongue, nudging your food closer to you, and you sigh heavily. Maybe you’re just wrong, you think, taking a bite from the bread. Maybe this is just a misunderstanding. Maybe you’re just overthinking.

You eat your lunch and steal some wet wipes from Gaeul in between. Right. It’s not like you’re ever gonna bump into them again. You live in, as cliche as it sounds, two different worlds after all. You’re just gonna watch their dramas, listen to their music, enjoy their performances, and that’s it that’s it that’s it.

“Prof Jang sent a message. Class is canceled.”

But still—

“Woohoo! Let’s go to the new dessert shop that opened downtown.”

Choi Beomgyu’s voice saying I love you, Choi Soobin’s cologne wafting in the air you were breathing in, and Choi Yeonjun’s lips pressed against your skin.

How can a sane person just forget about all of that?!

“Why do you look like you’re fantasizing about perverted shit?” Woohyun slaps you in the face with a reality check. This is fucking stupid.

“I’m not fantasizing,” you grunt, because they were events that actually fucking happened— they weren’t birthed from your brain’s insanity. “Anyway, dessert? Where is it?” You ignore your burning face, hoping that your friends decide to ignore it too, but Gaeul has her eyes narrowed at you. Crap. She didn’t recognize that it’s you in the videos right? Holy fucking hell, you’d rather die.

“Aren’t you gonna answer that?”

Oh. Well. That’s— that’s something. A good something because she hasn’t suspected you yet, moitioning instead to your cracked phone that has been buzzing under your notice because you’ve been thinking way too fucking much.

You check the caller ID, but it’s an unknown number, and it doesn’t match the business card you got from your run in with the alleged Choi Beomgyu. “Hello?” you answer, and a voice you don’t recognize says your name and asks if it’s you. “Yes, this is her. Who’s this?”

Another item added to the weird as fuck things that happened to your this week. You excuse yourself from your friends, and with knitted brows, you listen to the stranger at the other end of the line. “You met Choi Soobin the other day at a 7-Eleven in Gangnam, right?” The fuck? Did someone see you that day? Is this a stalker? “This is his manager. Lee Byeongho. I would like to speak with you regarding a certain matter.”

Now, hold the fucking phone.

“Is everything alright?”

You respond to Huening’s concern with a stiff smile before turning away from them. “Did I do something wrong?” you fuss into the call. “I didn’t post any of the photos from that day. I never talked about it online either, and I’m pretty sure my friends haven’t either. Wait. Wait a minute. How did you get my number?”

“Yes, it was difficult to obtain knowing only your first name and university.” That doesn’t answer your question. That just gave you more questions. “But, no. You aren’t in trouble. Actually...I called because you’re the only one who can help us— help Soobin— get out of trouble.”

Your face scrunches up.

“I’m at your campus right now. Parking lot. Do you mind meeting me for a moment?”

Just what did you get yourself into?

“You haven’t finished your food. Where are you going?”

“Somewhere,” you reply, quickly snatching your half-eaten sandwich from the table as your friends follow your swift movements with matching looks of confusion. “I’ll be right back. It’s nothing, don’t worry.” However, you are quite worried. You’re pretty sure Lee Manager, or whatever, is committing some data privacy crimes against you, but the one thing you want at the moment is answers. Your brain is about to explode from all the fucking questions and confusion. There’s a sliver of hope that meeting up with this sketchy guy can answer a few of them. You’d take that chance to air out your head.

There’s a black van in the parking lot. It’s the first thing you noticed because one of its doors are open, and there’s a familiar looking guy waiting just in front of the exposed seats. 

He notices you approaching. “It’s nice to finally meet you,” he says. What’s with men you’re meeting for the first time treating you with familiarity? You’re going to rip your hair out and throw yourself into moving traffic.

“Sure, but can you get to the point?” you stiffly say. “I’m a little busy. I still have classes in a bit.”

“Of course, I’m sorry. This whole situation must’ve come off as a shock to you.” Great, now you’re feeling bad. Soobin’s manager (allegedly) looks like he’s been through a whole lot as well. “Anyway. You are a fan of Choi Soobin, correct?”

“Well,” you blink. “Yes.”

“How about the dramas Kang Jaehee has written and directed?” he follows up. “Are you a fan of those as well?”

Your brows furrow. “I guess?” Peach Tree. That Summer. Mogi. Those are the titles that come right at the top of your head. “What does that have to do anything with me?” Manager Lee spares you a look of pity. You feel like this meet-up is just set out to making you even more fucking confused.

“I sincerely apologize. I didn’t want to drag you into this either, but I’m afraid you’re the only option I have,” says Manager Lee despondently. “Since...since you are a fan of Soobin, and I assume that means you also care about his career, so—”

He pauses. Like he’s practicing the next set of words he’s about to say inside his head.

“—do you mind meeting up with him to convince him to take the lead role for Kang Jaehee’s upcoming drama?”

But nothing could’ve prepared you for that.

What.

What the fuck?

“Mr Manager. Sir,” you start, appalled beyond comprehension. “I’d appreciate it if you start making a bit more sense.” 

“Trust me, I can’t believe I’m doing this either.”

You’re speechless. Your mouth is hanging open with no words coming out because, again, what the fuck? Manager Lee looks just as defeated as you, as if he weren’t the one who had just presented that ridiculous proposal. You are, quite frankly, at a discernible loss. 

Manager Lee lets out a sigh and digs a hand into his pocket. “I’m afraid this is all the time I have today. But please contact me once you’ve made a decision.” Another business card acquired. This is just dandy. “I am really hoping for your cooperation, miss. I’m sure you’re aware of Soobin’s inactivity lately, and my intention of approaching you today is simply in order to help my star’s career. Please consider the favor positively, and we will compensate you as much as my authority can allow.”

With that, you’re left with another laminated piece of paper in your hands. Gosh. This is a headache. When you get back to your friends, they notice the distress you’re in, further justifying a visit to the new dessert store, and seeing how your soul has completely left your body, you’re dragged along with them with ease.

“Hey, pick one. My treat,” says Woohyun. You let out a grunt and point at a random pastry on display. Next thing you know, you’re seated in between Huening and Gaeul at the store you don’t even know the name of. 

Huening is force feeding you an eclair. “Eat.” Your scowl disappears when you allow the eclair entry into your mouth. “Seriously, what’s going on with you? Who did you meet earlier?” 

Seeing as you show absolutely no intentions of telling them, they refuse to question you about it further. Good on them, because there’s no way in hell you’re spilling your predicament. Not until you find out exactly what kind of situation you’re in, at the very least. The two business cards feel like they’re weighing your pockets down, a constant reminder of their existence along with the scrawl Yeonjun left behind.  

“I know exactly how to make you feel better.”

The declaration comes from Gaeul, who slides her phone over to you, and when you look down to see what exactly her miracle medicine is to make you feel less manic, you hack out a cough upon seeing Choi Yeonjun’s face on her phone screen. “The hell is wrong with you?” asks Taehyun from across, giving you some water to push down the eclair lodged in your throat. “I know you like him, but even that is an overreaction.”

Jesus, you’re close to losing it. When you’ve avoided choking to death, Gaeul puts an airpod into your ear, and you hear Yeonjun reading out some comments. “Choi Yeonjun, you look really happy lately, did something good happen? someone asked,” he says while having snacks of his own. “First of all, why are you calling me Choi Yeonjun? It’s like you’re putting a wall between us. I don’t like it.”

Gaeul makes a noise of some sort and had you not been subjected to this week’s insanities, you might have reacted the same way too. Instead, you simply listen to his live in caution, feigning disinterest as you watch him nibble on some pretzels and churros through the screen, continuing to answer the slew of questions in the comments.

“Anyway, you’re right! Something good did happen.” Yeonjun hums while picking out a pretzel from the paper bag, rustling noise and a lively tune filling the audio for a moment— a short moment, right before he continues speaking. “That’s because I finally met the love of my life.”

Taehyun has to give you his water again.

“Oh? Oho, what’s with the exclamation points?” he laughs. “Did I meet them the other day? Hmm...that’s a secret. You’re curious? You think it might be you? Well, let’s see. Should I describe her?”

“God, he’s so fucking messy,” says Gaeul from beside you. “This is why I like him. How many calls is he getting for his manager and company this time?”

“What’s going on? Why is she so startled?”

“Yeonjun’s talking about his apparent soulmate, I don’t know. Wanna listen?”

“Didn’t he get in trouble for doing the same thing last time too?”

Now, you’re not one to give a shit about his love life, and you like to stay out of that side of celebrity gossip as much as you can, but Choi Yeonjun himself is droning on about the love of his life right now. You can’t not hear about it even if you want to. However, as much as you want to let things come into one ear and out through the other, you can’t. Because— wait. Wait. His description is eerily familiar. His description is making you double take and second guess what you’re fucking hearing.

“Sounds a lot like you,” Taehyun remarks without much thought, right after Choi Yeonjun says that the girl he likes has a bit of an attitude, but he likes that about her.

Huening lets out a snort. “Yeah, that’s definitely you. Why don’t you go in a wedding dress the next time you attend a fansign? Who knows, you might have a shot.”

You snap them a dirty look. Fuck. This is making your head spin. For the second time, Choi Yeonjun’s tendency of putting himself into headlines and the trending searches for doing something insane is giving you nothing but stress.

“I did give her my number, but she hasn’t messaged me yet, so I’m quite hurt.”

Number. Hold on a fucking second.

“The comments are going crazy.”

You grab your bag from underneath you, dropping it down to your lap.

“Hey, if you’re watching this, pl—eeeeease contact me. Kim Noona thinks I have a phone addiction now because I’ve been dying waiting for your call.”

You quickly get up from your seat.

“Yo, where are you going this time?”

“I need a minute,” you announce, eyes scanning the store for a quiet place alone while hugging your bag to your chest. There’s nowhere. Looks like you have to get out. 

“Damn, we were just joking. As if you have a chance with a celebrity like him.”

Huening’s joke is ignored and you quickly leave outside the doors, making a sharp turn around the corner, slipping through the passersby downtown until you find an empty alley. Your heart is racing. Your heart is racing like crazy and you may be reaching right now. You may be acting crazy, but what Choi Beomgyu said during the interview with Yeong-Il the other day is echoing in your mind, and— in conjunction with everything else that had happened— you’re starting to think that maybe he wasn’t joking.

Your cracked phone screen greets you when you take it out of your pocket. On your other hand is the first business card you got this week.

“Who’s this?”

“Hello. Good day.” You tell them your name, the events that led up to you receiving this number, with the hope that maybe you’re finally on to something. “I’d like to talk about the compensation for my broken phone.”

Whatever that something is, you’re gonna get to the bottom of it.

*

It’s already beyond closing time at Kwiyeomdongmoim Cafe (a mouthful, you know), yet your pink apron is still neatly tied around your waist as you pace back and forth, to and fro, in circles inside the breakroom. The time is half-past nine in the evening. You should’ve clocked out thirty minutes ago, but you’re still waiting. 

The knock on the door signified the end of your wait. You turn to see your boss’s head popping in through the half-open crack. 

“Three guys are waiting for you,” informs Seokmin. “They all seem handsome. Are they your suitors?”

When you ditched your friends at the still unnamed dessert store the other day, you did it to make a few calls. Three, to be exact. Today is the culmination of those calls, which is why you’ve been erratically nervous the entire freaking day. Choi Soobin, Choi Beomyu, and Choi Yeonjun’s managers all answered respectively when you called all the sketchy numbers you got and made some negotiations (apparently, the mess on your album is Yeonjun’s number, but he got his phone confiscated after that livestream). 

“As if,” you say, walking up to the door leading back into the cafe. Suitors, more like stalkers. Fans stalking their idols is common, but the other way around is a pretty fresh idea. “Anyway, thanks, Kyeom. Thank you for letting me use the store for a while.” Because this is the only private place you can think of outside of your own home— and there’s no way in hell you’re letting them in there when you don’t even know how they managed to get hold of your personal information.

“We’re closed anyway.” Seokmin smiles and makes way for you to pass by. “Go ahead and do your thing. Do you want me to stay inside or keep watch?” 

“You can stay inside, it’s alright.” 

He nods. “Call me when you’re done. Scream if you need backup. I can handle all of them.”

You laugh and thank him once more, a pat on his arm before you decide to peek out the door first as a precautionary measure. From your spot, you can see three thoroughly covered men in windbreakers, caps, and masks sitting on three separate tables in the store. The blinds have already been rolled down, so you can’t see anything outside, but there doesn’t appear to be any cameras around, so you take it as a safe sign to finally leave your hiding spot.

The moment you do, the break room door creaks, and all three pairs of eyes immediately fall on you. 

They stand up. They call out your name in unison.

Holy shit.

And when they do, they all look at each other with a sudden flash of hostility in the air.

Um. Well. How are you supposed to do this? “H—hello,” you manage to squeak out, prompting their attention once more. Soobin takes off his cap and removes his mask, the other two following suit, and oh my god. Oh my god. You suck in a deep breath. Today, you are not a fan. You are an interrogator. This is not a fansign. This is an interrogation. 

“I— uh, I asked your managers if I can meet you all to—today for a specific reason.” Wow. Good job. Your hands are shaking and you can’t look up from the floor or else you’d start losing your mind. “But—but, before that— would...would you like some drinks…?”

Interrogation paused. You need to get your shit together first.

“Please enjoy.”

With the help of your boss (because your hands wouldn’t stop shaking and you dropped the first one you made), you managed to whip up four iced teas and settle all three of them into one table at the very back of the store. You send a stiff smile at Seokmin after he placed all the drinks on the table.

God, you owe him so much— especially when he’s being unreasonably glared at by the three men sitting with you right now. Choi Beomgyu to your left, Choi Soobin to your right, Choi Yeonjun directly across from you and holy fuck, you have yet to look at them properly yet for your own safety. They haven’t been talking to each other either, simply sitting and waiting for you to speak. You’re pretty sure they know each other though, at least by name, being in the same industry and all. 

To say that the tension in the air is suffocation would be an understatement. How...how do you start this? The fuck should you say first?

“You know, I was really happy when Kim Noona told me you called.”

Apparently you don’t have to start it. Choi Yeonjun does it for you.

“But why are these two crashing our date?”

And that’s when things also start to get messy.

“Date?” Choi Soobin interjects. He sounds offended. Why does he sound offended. “What are you talking about?”

Choi Yeonjun doesn’t get a chance to make his case. Because Choi Beomgyu from your left suddenly snatches one of your hands from the table, prompting you to look at one of them for the first time tonight, and your eyes fly wide open. “I’d...like to apologize for the other day. I was just overtaken by my emotions. I hope you weren’t too freaked out.”

You are quite freaked out because holy shit, this is too much maybe. Not maybe. Yes. This is too much. Too. Much.“Hey, why are you holding her hand?!” you hear Choi Soobin exclaim from your other side. Choi Beomgyu’s soft expression suddenly disappears into a glare and a sneer the moment he shifts his gaze.

“You’re holding her hand too!”

“Why can’t I?!”

“Hey, this isn’t fair! One of you switch with me—”

Dizzy. You’re feeling dizzy. Your head is spinning and you’re suffocating from the heat emanating from your very face. Whatever they’re arguing about isn’t even reaching your ears anymore. You’re getting lightheaded and your sweaty hands start slipping out from the two’s weirdly tender hold on your hands because your body is physically breaking down.

“Shut up! Oh my god, my head—”

Your vision actually starts spinning for a second so you quickly bring the bottom of your palms to your temples, elbows on the table to balance yourself, only to be wobbled and shaken because the three suddenly jolted off their seats in panic.

“Are you okay?!”

“I’m fine, just please—for the love of god— sit down and shut up.”

They sit down and shut up. You massage your temples in silence. You remove your hands from your face and, after sucking in a deep breath and releasing it thereafter, feel your heartbeat settling into a normal rate. As normal as it can get in this situation.

“Whew. Okay. I think I’m ready. Let’s get down to business.” Finally, you’re the one steering the conversation. You give each of them a once over as quickly as possible because now you know that prolonged eye contact will only hurt you. You settle with looking at the gaps between each of them. That’s fine. You’re fine. “Choi Soobin, Choi Yeonjun, Choi Beomgyu.”

It’s like three bulbs just lit up in succession. Your brain is starting to hurt.

“A—as I was saying, you three are some of South Korea’s biggest celebrities and although I am, in fact, a big fan of all three of you—” Why is Choi Soobin growing pink. Why the fuck is he blushing. “—that— that does not make me fail to recognize the amount of weird shit that’s been happening lately, and I think I need answers.”

They are still sitting down and shutting up. They listen to instructions well, at the very least.

“First, how the fuck did all three of you know my name without any prior introduction. Second—”

The words get clamped in your throat. It’s lodged in there very tightly because you make the mistake of looking one of them in the eye, only to notice that all three of them are looking at you with the same expression. An expression you can only describe as longing.

And your face starts burning.

“Se— second, why…why do you all keep looking at me like I’m an ex you want to get back together with…?”

Maybe you asked the wrong question.

Because for some reason they all look sad now. Really sad. Really fucking sad and it’s making your stomach clench and nerves all numb and funky because making three big celebrities all sad simultaneously is a bragging right at one end of the spectrum, and a national crime at the other.

It’s Choi Soobin who cracks the silence. “I…I had a feeling when I saw you again for the first time at the store.” Again? “Do you not remember me?”

Your face furrows. “No…? Did we ever meet before you became an actor?”

Hurt. The look of sadness has now spiraled into hurt and one might think you just stabbed and twisted a knife into his fucking gut.  “How—how about me?” Your attention turns to Choi Yeonjun who isn’t looking any better. It’s like his entire world view was just proven to be wrong and why does it feel like you’re the one to blame. 

What else can you do but shake your head in denial? Now he looks like he’d just been told he’s adopted!

“You’re…you’re joking,” he tries to laugh it off, but it only comes off as strained and shaky, then, in one fell swoop— desperate. “R—right…?”

“Great!”

Before you start feeling even shittier, Choi Beomgyu finally decides to join in. 

“And here I thought her forgetting about me was the worst case scenario.” His tone is bitter. There’s a snap in his words. “I didn’t think there’d be other bastards in the same situation as me. God fucking damn it.”

There’s a moment of silence. You watch as realization hits the other while you’re still left in the dark. Choi Yeonjun juts his seat closer. Choi Soobin tries to reach a hesitant arm to your direction, but you’re  tugged to the other side by Choi Beomgyu, who’s suddenly a little too, too close.

“Hey.”

Your hands are clamped together. 

“I meant it when I said I love you. I do. I have loved you four hundred years ago and I still love you now, and if whatever god or deity decides to make you meet you for the third time, I’ll still love you then.”

Beomgyu’s holding both of them in between his in a firm grip.

“Second life is about you. Blue Spring is about you. You’re the person I’ve been waiting for from the beginning of this life until the last.”

Now, if this situation wasn’t crazy, your heart would be skipping a beat right now.

But it is crazy. This is fucking insane. And you look around to see that there’s a weird look of sympathy and understanding in the other Choi’s eyes, clearly not recognizing the visceral insanity of this situation, which fills you with a swallowing lump of existential dread. You pry your hands out of Beomgyu’s grasp (you swear you can hear glass breaking), and slowly turn to Choi Yeonjun and say, with a very hesitant, very cautious, “Y...you too…?”

The look on his face says it all. And then you swivel over to Choi Soobin.

“And you?” 

“I’ve lo—”

“No!” you snap. “Don’t finish that sentence. Please. Oh my god.”

You see Seokmin popping his head out from the corner, mouthing an are you okay? and you shakily bring up a weak thumbs up. “Well, isn’t this interesting,” you hear Choi Yeonjun say, which feels like a slap in the face because what exactly is interesting about this. “Here I thought I was special.”

“Get off your high horse,” retorts Choi Soobin, a sneer in his voice. You double take. Choi Soobin is supposed to be sweet and gentle and kind. Who is this man? “Whatever kind of past you had with her doesn’t mean anything. I met her first. I met her at the end of King Danjong’s rule.”

“Ha!” Choi Yeonjun starts. “We got married under King Taejong. I’ve loved her before any of you did.”

Now, what the fuck?

Choi Soobin’s face pales and he chokes over his words. “M—married?”

There’s a smug grin on Choi Yeonjun’s face. He leans back against the chair with his arms crossed in victory. “You heard that correctly. Married. Pack up your bags. Unless you want me to tell you everything we did on our we—”

“Shut up, shut up, I don’t want to hear it!”

Marriage. King Danjong. King Taejong. Second life. The gears are churning inside your head. You don’t like the direction where the gears are pointing.

“What about you?”

Choi Yeonjun raises the question and the attention is now on Choi Beomgyu. He’s been quiet. The other two wait for him to say his piece— a feigned air of disdain and arrogance but there’s an unconcealable undertone of nervousness underneath it all. Your iced teas have been left untouched. Choi Beomgyu simply scoffs and presses his crossed arms against his chest.

“I have no reason to tell you any of that. This is between me and her.”

And at your mention, you receive the undivided attention of three pairs of eyes once more. Your heart rattles. God fucking damn it. Listen, you’re an avid consumer of the entertainment industry. You’ve watched a good amount of dramas and have read a good amount of manhwas to surmise a conclusion with the bits and pieces of stray information being tossed back and forth between the three. And it’s all ridiculous. But you have nothing else to work with unless they come spilling their guts themselves.

“So,” you clear your throat. “Are you three, like…a couple…hundred years old…?”

They all look offended. 

“No!”

Well, maybe you’re wrong about that part. But after a very long, convoluted discussion, the “facts” (if you can even call it that), are finally laid down on your feet.

They say you’ve all met before. Separately, in three separate lifetimes, with this one allegedly being your fourth unless there were lives in between that they can’t remember. One thing for certain is that the three of them remember the life they had while loving you— and they loved you very much apparently because those feelings and memories got carried over even after they got reborn into the present day.

The problem is, you don’t have the same symptoms. You don’t remember anything about your past lives. Hell, you can’t even remember anything in this life before you hit two years old. 

You slump in your seat. The table rattles. They get up from their chairs and come circling around you in concern.

“Are— are you okay, do you need to lie down? You could rest in my van for a while and—”

You swat Choi Yeonjun’s hand away before it could land on your shoulder. You’ve now got your hands on your face in stress, and peeking through you see Choi Soobin on your right, crouching down and looking up at you with furrowed brows and big, sad eyes. On your left is Choi Beomgyu, half-seated on the chair. You let out a very long, very anguished and muffled groan. This is too much. “If— if what you guys are saying is true,” you say. “What does it matter?”

There’s a tense pause in the air. 

“What do you mean…?”

You spring up from your seat and turn around, Choi Yeonjun in front of you. 

“I mean what does it all matter? King Sejeong, Joseon era, or whatever— I don’t care about all of that. We’re in the twenty-first century right now. I’m neither your lover nor your wife. I’m just a fan of your dramas and music and performances and that's it.”

You squeeze your eyes shut. You don’t really want to see their faces right now. You let a huff of air slip past your lips, turning back around to collect the untouched glasses of drinks on the table.

“Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to meet me and explain. I hope it’s all settled. Thanks for clearing everything up today. You can now all leave.”

It’s Choi Yeonjun who races after you when you make your firm and quick strides to the counter. He cuts off your path. “I—I don’t understand,” he chokes out. You make the mistake of meeting his gaze and see the threat of tears glazing his eyes. “What—what do you mean?”

Admittedly, that hurled a giant pang against your ribcage, knocking the air out of your chest, but you move forward. You brush past him, setting the glasses back on the counter, and— after a moment’s pause— you turn around, a heavy weight on your shoulders. It’s like gravity is trying to suck you deep into the mantle. “What I’m trying to say is we should all just get over what happened all those hundreds of years ago and live our lives in the present. I mean, I don’t know any of you. Don’t you think it’s unhealthy to keep clinging onto the past, especially when you guys are nothing but strangers to me in this life?”

Dead silence. You don’t dare look at any of them in the face. You try and retreat to the break room as quickly as you can, hands fumbling to untie your apron along the way, but you stumble over your steps, screeching to a halt the moment you hear someone say—

“Do you think it’s that easy?”

You could hear your heart in your eardrums. 

It takes all the strength in your body for you to look back, to see the pained expression on Choi Beomgyu’s face standing the farthest away from you out of the three. “Do you think I put my name out there so that it’d be easier for you to find me, wrote all those songs about you in the hopes that I could see you again if you’re someone I can just easily forget?”

Your throat tightens. It’s like you’re swallowing a boulder.

“If you wanted me to forget about you, you shouldn’t have died right in front of me then. You shouldn’t have told me you loved me right before you went cold in my arms if you wanted me to fucking forget.”

Oh.

Oh, god.

Choi Yeonjun and Choi Soobin don’t look any better. It hits you that you might have been more than a little bit unfair.

“I’m sorry.”

You don’t know your history. You don’t know what the fuck happened between you and them throughout those years that made them feel so strongly about you. But it must be harder for those who remember than for those who forgot.

It’s not like they chose to live in the present with half of their souls stuck in the past, either. You’ve been acting awfully unfair.

“I was being insensitive. I’m so sorry,” you exhale. Your knees feel like they’re about to buckle. Your head is spinning in circles. “But to be honest, this is all still very overwhelming, and I’m having a hard time comprehending and making sense of everything. It doesn’t feel real.” You try to take a step closer, but your legs give in. Choi Yeonjun quickly rushes to balance you back on your feet.

“Don’t push yourself,” he says, softly. You can’t look at him. God, these guys really know how to bring your guilt all the way home.

“Thanks, um, anyway—” You breathe in. Shit, you can’t believe you’re considering this. “Again, I really can’t and won’t be able to understand the magnitude of your— well, uh— feelings, since I really don’t remember anything. But how about…I spend some time with each of you individually, and maybe…maybe it can help in jogging back my memories?”

The atmosphere shifts. Ah. This feels like a fucking trap.

“You— you mean it?”

To be honest, you’d much rather just not deal with any of this, just stay at home and continue living your life with these three men as persons you only know behind the screen. But those looks in their eyes— hopeful and melancholic— make you feel your organs are being rearranged every five seconds, and you’d feel bad leaving them with the pain of this conversation especially after they poured out their hearts to you.

You can’t deny the joy and escape they’ve given you for the past couple of years you’ve spent as their fan. Maybe entertaining this unreality is the least you can do.

“I mean, well,” you start, clearing your throat. “Choi Beomgyu, you still need to pay for my phone. Choi Soobin, your manager wanted me to talk to you about something, and Choi Yeonjun—”

You look at the guy who still has one arm pressed against your back, two hands in a firm grip on your shoulders. He’s looking at you and batting his eyes expectantly. You let out a sigh and set yourself loose.

“I need to discuss something with you soon, too.” As in, please stop vaguely mentioning me in your live streams because I fear I might find an angry mob in front of my house. “I think I have all your contact information anyway.”

There aren’t any more reactions coming from them. This seems like the best possible solution for all of you. You sigh again. This has been an emotionally draining evening. You can’t wait to get some fucking rest.

“I’ll be in touch with you or your managers soon. For now, let’s call it a day.”

STAR STUDDED BAGGAGE. © hannie-dul-set, 2024.

[nalgenewhore]

give her his onliness

elide x lorcan, canon-divergence/circus era, NSFW + feelings, shifting allegiances, word count: 5347

It’s hot, and the smoke in the air mixes with the humidity to form this oppressive fog. 

Lorcan feels like he hasn’t had a full lungful of air in days. The weather tightens the lead on his temper, and he’s forced to bite back a snappish remark every other minute. 

He’s laying on the riverbank now, his shirt, boots, and socks discarded beside him. Once the sun goes down, he’ll be forced to put on that sticky, dust-collecting oil and go back on that pathetic stage to entertain the peasant masses. He is not a gifted nor humble performer, but that doesn’t deter the bold and foolish few who proposition him after. 

As if he could want any of them. 

He knows now what it means to really desire someone, and not only as a means for his pleasurable ends. Since that night in the oracle’s tent, he thinks of one thing only, dreams of one thing only.

There's rustling in the trees across the river. He slits open his eyes, making no other movement, to find the subject of his desire. 

Elide puts her hands on her hips. His lips twitch - she’s so wondrously stubborn, a trait he would loathe in anyone else. She actually bared her blunt teeth at him once, the brave little thing. 

“I know you’re awake,” she accuses him. “We have work to do, you know.”

Lorcan shuts his eyes again. “I am not eager to return,” he says. “If you are, feel free to go.”

The next thing he hears is a soft splashing, and then she’s standing over him. Elide drops her skirts. “What are you doing?”

“I believe it’s called relaxing.”

She nudges him with her foot, and faster than she can react, he captures her ankle. She gasps, hopping slightly to retain her balance. Lorcan lets go when she stumbles so he can catch her falling. Elide glares at him. “You did that on purpose, you brute.” Her small palms are pressed into the muscles of his chest. 

“Sit,” he says. “Relax.” He sets her down on the rocks beside him. “We have time.”

Elide huffs a humourless chuckle at that. They don’t, really. They can pretend they do, they can carve it out of stone. He sees the tension around her eyes melt; she relents in silent agreement. 

She exhales a sigh that’s too weathered. Lorcan reclines once more and reaches out to press his hand against her back. It may seem casual to an outside view, but the touches between them are never casual. She relaxes when he strokes her spine with his thumb. “It’s too hot,” she complains.

“Take off your clothes.”

“Lorcan!” she snaps, twisting to glare at him. The heat makes her irritable. 

He lifts his hands. “I won’t be anything less than a gentleman.”

“You don’t know the meaning of the word.”

He chuckles, “I am not propositioning you. It’s hot, and the river is cool. Bathe in it.” Her eyes are still narrowed. “I won’t look.”

For some reason, that doesn’t eliminate the irritation lining her face; it switches to something else, equally bothered. Lorcan shuts his eyes, too tired to decipher whatever that means. He listens to her stand, and then articles of clothing drop onto the stones, something landing on his chest.

He keeps his eyes shut as she walks away, her steps uneven. Lorcan sends out a little strand of his magic to brace her ankle. Elide hums a bit, and the water splashes as she runs forward with a laugh he seldom hears.

It makes a crooked smile appear on his face. Her joy, to him, is something precious, which he doesn’t fully understand. For the first time in a while, not knowing something doesn’t bother him; he lets it be as it is.

“Lorcan,” she calls him.

“Hmm?”

She clicks her tongue, “Lorcan.”

She wants something, his attention maybe, and he knows it. He smirks to himself. “Yes?”

Next, she does something he doesn’t expect and splashes him. Lorcan sits up with a raised brow. Elide looks back at him with a coy smile, delight shining in her eyes. She moves her hands to splash him again, and he warns her, “Don’t you dare.”

Elide cocks her head to the side. “No?” She pushes the water harder, some of it hitting his torso. 

Lorcan stands up, fully ready to charge her and make her regret it, but something tears her gaze from his. She backs away, but not from him, with wide eyes. “Lorcan,” she whispers. He turns and sees that snivelling man, Nik, skulking in the brush. 

Anger rolls through him, and no small amount of fear - how did not sense another’s presence? Lorcan moves in front of the mortal man, his lips curling back from his teeth. “What do you think you’re doing?” He looms over Nik, ready to wrench the man off his feet, but Elide as his ever-present observer curbs his murderous urge. “Spying on another man’s wife while she bathes?”

“I- I--”

He reaches down anyway and pulls him to his feet so he can shove him backwards. “Leave, or I will rip your eyes from your skull,” Lorcan seethes. He lowers his voice so Elide can’t hear. “Do not push me, boy. If you think you’ve learned what pain is, I guarantee I can prove you wrong.”

Nik scrambles away, and the scent of his fear makes Lorcan’s nose wrinkle. He watches the man until he’s gone, then faces Elide.

She’s coming out of the river now, stumbling because her arms are wrapped around herself. Lorcan goes to help her. “Elide.”

She shakes her head and lets him pull her close till their bodies press together. Elide won’t look up at him.

“You’re alright,” he tells her.

She doesn’t respond.

Lorcan loosely holds the side of her neck, his thumb brushing her jaw. “Look at me,” he says softly. With a roll of her eyes, she does what he says. He strokes her jaw again. “You’re alright. I’ll always make sure of that.”

Slowly, she nods, her hand lifting to hold his wrist. “I know.” It seems like she means her words.

Whatever peace they found in this oasis has been ruined, and they won’t stay here anymore. He hands her his shirt to dry herself with, but Elide ends up donning it. Lorcan doesn’t let his surprise show as she folds back the sleeves.

He collects the water pails and doesn’t let her carry anything. They’re silent as they return back to camp. Nik avoids them, the only smart thing he’s done today. 

Lorcan has no time to talk with her more because Ombriel steals her away to dress her in that ridiculous costume and Molly snaps commands at him. 

✵✵✵✵✵

Outside, Molly rings the big bell to signal the end of the night’s show. 

Elide wears a brittle smile as she ushers her last customers out of the tent. The minute the fabric doors fall back into place, she rips the gods-forsaken headdress off. She hobbles towards the back where she stashed a jug of water and some cloths. The thick make-up she wears feels like a mask.

She wets a rag and drags it over her cheek, scrubbing at the white paste. She has no idea how something can be both oily and tacky at the same time. 

She’s so wrapped up in her need to feel clean that she doesn’t notice the figure approaching from behind.

A hand lands on her shoulder, and she nearly jumps out of her skin. 

Elide whirls around with a soft shout, her hand dropping to the knife stashed in her waistband. 

“Woah,” Lorcan says, realising his mistake. He backs away with his hands raised. “It’s me, just me.”

Her eyes fall shut. She sighs and reaches out to push his stomach. “Don’t do that.” Elide steps closer to him, needing a refuge. When Lorcan backs away, shirking her presence, she gives him a hurt look.

He shakes his head, explaining, “I’m covered in oil and sweat.” He rolls his shoulders. “I need to clean myself.”

“Here,” she passes him a few cloths and a jug of water.

They work side by side in tandem, cleaning themselves as best they can. Elide wipes at her face until no more white paste comes off. There’s probably more, but she’s too tired to care. She sits down at the table and stares into nothing while Lorcan finishes up.

He joins her a little while later, his long legs stretched out. He’s looking at her, but his gaze is just a little bit off-centred. 

“What?”

“You have some more,” he says. Lorcan reaches under her chair to tug it closer; Elide gasps through her nose at the display of strength. “Let me get it.”

She indeed lets him. He’s gentle with the rag, softly wiping the spot behind her jaw and her ears. 

He watches her face, depthless eyes tracking every emotion even in their absence. “What’re you thinking about?”

She rouses slightly. Her gaze meets his, hopeless and flat. “I can’t stay here,” she tells him in a hushed tone. “I have to leave.” Elide rubs her sternum with the flat of her palm. “I feel it - in here. I’m not safe.”

“Because of him?”

“It’s not just- today.”

“Where will you go?”

Elide swallows. “Anywhere. I’ll make it work, I’ll find another way.” She lowers her voice even more but knows that he’ll hear it just fine. “They look at us like we’re commodities, Lorcan. They’ll sell us out to the highest bidder.”

“So you’re going?”

“As soon as I can,” she vows.

Lorcan looks at her with heavy eyes, saying something she can’t quite decipher. He puts the cloth down. “It’s late. Bed?”

Her lips quirk with an appreciative smile. 

They stand up to leave together, and Elide slips her hand in his elbow. As they walk out, she realises belatedly that her companion is still shirtless. It wrinkles her brow. She asks, “Where is your shirt?”

“Sold it. Got a silver piece this time.”

“Look at you,” she teases, her worry lifted for a moment. “What ever will they do without you?”

Lorcan glowers at the straggling circus-goers that stare at him. They’re shameless, barely even noticing the male’s supposed wife hanging off his arm. His nostrils flare when he sees a familiar piece of black linen clutched against some blushing farm girl’s chest. “Do they have any shame?”

“No, none,” Elide shakes her head.

He mutters something about manners, and she stifles her laughter against his arm. Who would’ve thought that Lorcan Salvaterre could say anything about other people’s propriety? He shrugs off her touch so he can wrap his arm around her. She allows a smirk to show. 

They stroll past the caravan and go further, their tent near the forest line. 

Just as they’re almost out of ear shot, someone stops them. “Where’s your earnings? We settle every night.”

Lorcan looks over his shoulder with flat eyes. “You’ve had my wife working since sunup, and now we will rest. You’ll get your cut in the morning.” He’s almost daring Molly to say something.

Elide tugs on his belt.

He shifts his eyes to her, and she softly shakes her head, telling him to let it go. He lets out a long suffering sigh. She pulls him along with her, too tired for any more conflict. 

Once they’re in the tent, Lorcan puts up a shield of his magic so that it will block any sound or signs of movement from outside even when the candles are lit.

He takes off his boots and pants before reclining on the thick bedroll. Lorcan stretches his arm over his eyes, listening to Elide undress. 

She lets out a long breath as she kneels. She swaps her heavy skirts for his buttoned shirt, bare beneath it. Next Elide begins the painstaking process of taking down her hair. The one kind thing Ombriel has done for her is give her a little bag of pins. She pats her coiled braids to find each little metal twine and pulls them out.

Once she’s sure they’re all out, she tries to uncoil her braid, but it holds fast. Elide tips her head back in exhausted frustration, groaning.

She senses more than hears her companion sit up. He passes his hand up her back till it braces the back of her head. Elide mumbles as she turns into him, “Do it for me.”

Lorcan doesn’t say a word as he looks over her scalp, picking out every pin she missed. Which, as it turns out, is quite a few. She thinks he’s going to stop now, but he also undos her braid. Elide leans her cheek against his chest. They sit in a comfortable silence, and he starts to stroke her hair. It’s slightly awkward at first, like he’s petting something, but it becomes more natural soon enough.

He asks when she hasn’t moved for a while, “‘lide? Are you asleep?”

She hums, “Not yet.” She lifts her head up. “Are you tired, Lorcan?” He raises a brow. “Because I am. I feel like I’ve been tired all my life.”

It’s wrong, he thinks, for someone her age to be wearied. He should not feel that her soul mirrors his. “Lie down,” he says. “I’ll let you sleep.”

They both know that’s not the kind of exhaustion she speaks of. His side prickles, cold now that she’s moving away. He returns to his spot and watches her when she reclines, about a foot of space between them. She curls on her side, facing him. Lorcan reaches out, “C’mere.”

Elide’s eyes open quickly. She looks surprised as she eyes his outstretched arm, the space he’s providing for her on his bedroll. She goes to the protection he’s offering. 

Despite the difference in their size, they fit together so well. The dip between his shoulder and torso provides the perfect crook for her cheek. She hesitates slightly, not sure where to put her arms. Lorcan drags his fingers up her forearm till their hands meet. 

They remain silent now. Elide looks up at his face. The flickering candlelight casts shadows across his harshly hewn features. His cheekbones jut out, just as proud as the aquiline ridge of his nose. She swallows when she stares at his lips, full and round. 

She wants to feel them against hers once more.

Elide moves a hand up to his jaw and turns his face towards hers. His eyes open, just a bit, a question in them. Before he can ask it, she kisses him. It’s a little off - she’s still new at this, unfamiliar with the mechanics of it all. 

Lorcan responds slowly, guiding the embrace into something smoother, less choppy. Elide feels herself sinking into it. She cups his face as he pulls her closer. He shifts onto his side so there’s more room for her to be pressed against him. 

The hand that held hers moulds to her waist. 

Her breath comes faster when he forces them to part. He stays close, though, and they share the same air. “What do you want?”

“You.”

He rubs her side. “Like how you wanted me the other night?”

She nods, drawing her bottom lip between her teeth.

“D’you want to fuck, Elide?”

She recoils at the term, denying its aggression. “No,” she says. Her eyes search his. “I want to be with you,” she presses her palm over his heart, feeling its thunderous beat. “I want you .”

His face softens. Lorcan brings her back to him for a gentle kiss. She doesn’t know why he does that. It’s like he’s trying to force her back by being too harsh.

Elide lets those thoughts float away. She parts her mouth when his tongue slides over her lips. 

His tongue against hers makes that tight, expectant feeling return to her belly and lower. He slopes a hand down her spine to her backside. She inhales through her nose, exhaling with a soft moan. 

When Lorcan pulls his mouth from hers, she lets out a disappointed sound that he quickly soothes, kissing her jaw instead. She tips her head up for further access, her hand curling around the back of his neck. “Yes,” she sighs, biting her lip as he sucks at her skin.

He teases her with the edge of his teeth and finds that one sensitive spot. She shudders slightly. 

Lorcan hums against her throat.

That spark blooms in her centre, making her twist her hips for relief. His hand moves to her thigh so he can bring her leg over his hips. Elide swallows, her breath faster. Slowly, she rocks her hips against him. She could cry at the reprieve it gives her.

“That’s it,” he murmurs. “Take what you want.”

It’s not enough.

She realises she spoke aloud when he lifts his head, now helping her movements. “Is that what you need?”

Elide shakes her head, chasing his lips. “More,” she mumbles against them. The feeling of his shirt against her skin is too warm now, she wants to feel his flesh instead. She scrapes her fingers down his chest, following the dark hair that trails beneath his waistband.

Lorcan catches her hand. In a quick motion, he’s got her flat on her back, wrist pressed against the padded ground. “I can give you more,” he swears. “I can give you everything.”

She nods, wanting that. She thinks he’s going to kiss her again, but he props himself up on an elbow. Elide waits in anticipation.

He fingers one of the buttons on his shirt, asking her permission. Elide nods again, battling against the urge to rut her hips against his thigh. 

As the shirt falls from her body, the cool air makes her shiver. His gaze falls to her chest, as he’s wont to do. She smiles to herself, slightly smug. Unlike the other times that people gawk at her body, she likes seeing the desire force the black of his pupils to overtake his iris. 

Lorcan drags the backs of his fingers up her stomach till he can grasp her breast. She curves her spine into his touch, a gasp falling from her lips when his thumb circles the peak. He lowers his mouth to the other one, lapping at it before pressing it against his teeth. 

Elide moans loudly before slapping her hand over her mouth. 

He looks up, then softly draws her hand away. “They can’t hear,” he promises. “The shield blocks it.” A strand of his magic snakes up her leg from her ankle. It feels cool against her hot skin. The inherent danger behind it makes her grow wet like last time. 

She squirms a bit. He kisses the heavy underside of her breast and then tracks his lips lower, to the cradle of her hips. Elide pushes herself up onto her elbows, “Whatareyoudoing?”

His thumb strokes the inside of her thigh, soothing. “Do you trust me, Elide?”

She nods choppily because she does, but she has no idea what he’s trying to do now, nor why he’s so far down. Lorcan presses his lips to the hollow of her hip, making her head tip back. “Oh.”

“Last time,” he murmurs, brushing kisses across her pelvis to the other hip. “I used my hand, remember?” She huffs a laugh - how could she not? He grins against her skin, then nips at the delicate flesh stretched over her hipbone. “I want to use my mouth this time.”

“People do that?” she asks, purely curious. “You would put-” she gestures, “down there? How?”

“With my tongue,” he says, then drags it over the junction between her leg and centre. “Or my teeth,” he bites her and sucks to create a little mark. “And my lips.” He kisses her then, hands sloping to the undersides of her thighs. 

“But… why?” Elide feels her cheeks growing red. She’s had it in her head her whole life that her own body is something to shy away from, an unfortunate embarrassment to deal with.

“I like making you feel good. And it will, I promise.” 

Elide nods as she breathes hard. “Yes.” She crashes onto her back, her arms giving up. He guides her legs over his shoulders, and when she doesn’t know where to put her hands, he guides them to his hair.

She grips the silken strands with a hum. 

Her eyes fly open when his thumb splits down her slit, his tongue lapping at that spot. She moans a bit, eager to watch him. 

She tries to pay attention as he uses his mouth on her, but with every moment, that arousal within her heightens till he’s stroking her towards that end - the climax.

His tongue dips inside her, curling against the front for a second. Then, he’s pressing sloppy kisses against her cunt. Lorcan’s hum vibrates through her. Elide gasps, not quite sure she’s breathing properly.

Apparently she’s moving too much since he bars a corded forearm across her lower stomach. She tries to push her hips against it, but he holds her fast.

Lorcan sucks on that little bundle of nerves, flicks the tip of his tongue against it. 

She starts babbling, saying all sorts of stuff but what comes out are repetitions of his name and ragged breaths.

Her release catches her by surprise, so much quicker than before. She feels her body tightening again and she stops breathing for a second. Elide pushes up on his arm without realising how tight her legs are around his head. Her fingers find purchase in his hair to pull ; she needs something to keep her on this earth.

“Oh, my gods,” she cries out. “Lorcan, Lor…”

He rises above her, and her legs fall to his hips, calves lying across his backside. Lorcan joins slowly, busy with tracking kisses up her torso. She slips her hands to the sides of his neck when he presses his lips to hers.

Elide blushes, realising she can taste herself. She notices a second or two later that she doesn’t mind it, actually. 

She opens her legs to let his body fit between them. One of his arms slips under her body and he winds his fingers in her hair. Their bodies grind together. She can feel that hardness beneath his undershorts. It makes her bite his bottom lip.

Lorcan chuckles, “Vicious.”

She grins against his mouth. Feeling bold, she trails her hand down his stomach. She relishes the way his body shudders, his head bending to watch her hand. Elide scrapes her teeth against his jaw and pushes her hand lower. 

He groans, pressing into the contact. “Lochan,” he bites out, his voice rough. “I, fuck…”

Elide nods even though he hasn’t asked her anything. “Please,” she says.

They part so they can both rid themselves of all clothes.

When they come back together, he kisses her deeply. Elide holds his shoulders, relishing in the way his weight bears on her. 

Lorcan fists himself to slowly drag his cock up and down her sex. Small noises fall from her lips, muffled by his, as he teases her. She moves her pelvis in time with him. “Please,” she repeats. “I want it.”

He hums, notching the head of his length inside her. Elide swallows. “You want it?”

She nods and is rewarded by another inch. “You want me?” he asks.

“Yes.” The word escapes her throat, desperate.

He continues like that, teasing her with a slow entrance while he asks her questions, only moving when she answers.

Elide feels like her lungs are in her chest when she’s taken all of him. She can feel him in her, and the walls of her sex flutter errantly. She puffs out some air, her eyes unable to focus on anything.

“Breathe,” he tells her, stroking her side. “Elide, breathe.” He inhales and exhales dramatically until she starts to copy him, her gaze locking on him. “Look at me, just me.”

She exhales shakily as he pulls out to thrust back in. Elide swears she’s trying to focus on him, but with every roll of his hips, her eyelids flutter. She wants to lose herself to this feeling. Whatever moment of peace they can steal away, she wants to stay in it.

“Lor,” she moans out.

He slips his arm under her knee and pushes it closer to her chest. He hits deeper now, each stroke rubbing against that spot inside of her. “Elide,” he pants, “Elide, Elide, Elide, darling.”

His breath is ragged and his head bows to press their brows together. Elide arches her back with a moan when he thrusts into her, her hands squeezing his shoulders. 

“‘lide, I promised to keep you safe,” whispers Lorcan, panting. “Elide, don’t go, don’t fucking leave me.” His voice is that of a broken person. It sounds like he’s on his knees before her. The most feared male throughout the kingdom begging her to stay. “I—“ he cuts himself off with a pleasured groan, his hand sliding down from her waist to grab her thigh, “I want—“

She presses her lips to his, hoping her answer was clear through her kiss. It’s hungry and deep like she’s trying to meld them into one being. Lorcan responds similarly, stilling inside of her with his hips pressed tightly against hers. A lump of emotions form in her throat and her eyes sting with tears. No one has ever wanted her to stay, no one has ever pleaded for her the way he does. Nobody, nobody, nobody, in her whole life. 

Tears leak past her lashes, trickling down her temples. He must realise because he draws back with a sharp inhale. Elide makes a sound of protest, wanting to tell him to ignore it, it’s not the time—

“Darling…” he murmurs. He hangs his head in defeat. “Don’t tell me. If you’re going, don’t tell me.”

She blinks up at him, her hands cupping the sides of his face. “Look at me,” Elide says softly. 

Lorcan shakes his head, mumbling something indistinctive. He tries to shift, to pull out of her, but Elide tightens her thighs around his hips. 

“Look at me,” she repeats. 

He slowly drags his gaze up to hers. 

“You are stupid,” Elide says. His brows draw together and she runs her finger over the crease that forms. “You are the stupidest male that has ever existed if you think that I-“ her voice catches and she sniffles, “would leave you .” He raises his head, stricken with wordless surprise. She rolls her eyes, clicking her tongue. “Och, you’re making me cry.”

A small smile glimmers on his lips, and Lorcan dips his face to kiss her soft skin. “Forgive me, darling.” She hums neutrally and he slowly rolls his hips, pulling out and filling her again. 

Elide gasps wetly, still tearful. Her hands immediately grab his shoulders once more as she squeezes her thighs around his hips. She lets out a low moan, her head falling back, “Oh…”

Her arms wrap around his neck to pull him closer. In this new position, she’s barely giving him any room to move, but he makes do. Elide thinks that the last time they did this, her first time ever, it was pleasurable and he satisfied her, but now, this is something else entirely.

She sighs into his ear, then bites the lobe. Lorcan’s teeth press into her neck, long canines almost breaking the skin. It makes her tip her head back again; she wants him to do it. Instead, he simply kisses her pulse and whispers, “Not yet.”

A moan breaks from her throat, maybe it’s the implicit promise or his touch, but whatever it is, Elide wants more. She tries to squeeze her legs tighter, wanting him closer, wanting him deeper. “Lorcan,” she pants. She makes a frustrated sound.

“Mm, what? What d’you need?”

“More.” She swallows. “You, I need you.”

Lorcan swears to her, “You have me.” He’ll give her anything she asks for, go to any length to preserve her contentment. He’ll bleed out to see her happy smile, one she wears in utter serenity. Just to stop himself from telling her, he kisses her. 

Elide arches into him as she inhales sharply. She slides the pink tip of her tongue across his lips, which part on an exhale. Their embrace grows deeper and brings them even closer. 

His weight bears on her when he grinds his hips against her pelvis. Elide shudders a bit, feeling it float out there - it’s so close. She whimpers softly and pulls away to stare up at him. His laboured breaths fan over her cheek. 

An attempt is made to tell him, needing someone to ground her. Her mouth won’t form the words, though, and it gets harder to think, her mind fuzzy. 

Lorcan nods. He understands her. “I know,” he murmurs. “Just feel it, it’s alright, darling.” He fucks into her a little harder, losing his control, and she moans, a wild and loud sound. “Let it come, ‘lide.”

She shuts her eyes when her body starts to tighten. Air doesn’t leave her chest as easily, and she thinks she’s about to faint. “Please,” she sighs. “I,” she swallows, “I want it…”

Elide cries out his name as she finishes. He bites her at the peak and lets his canines break skin. She holds the back of his neck so tight her nails make crescents. Through it, his hips don’t still, which both prolongs her pleasure and overwhelms her scrambled mind. 

She gasps when he reaches his own end, pulling out quickly. Lorcan cums with his face in her shoulder, his fingers digging into her hard. Elide blushes when she feels his spend smearing across her stomach.

The tent fills with the sounds of their uneven breathing. They lie together as sweat and his release cools rapidly. 

Goosebumps appear on the sides of her thighs. She grunts softly, nudging Lorcan. His hand rubs the outside of her leg. “What is it?”

“I’m cold.”

He presses his lips to the purpling skin where he dug his teeth in. He whispers an apology that she shakes her head and pulls his face up to kiss. “Don’t, I wanted it.”

He groans with some frustration. They exchange soft pecks until she knows they must part. Elide hated this part last time. She felt alone the second his back turned, even though he was only fetching her a shirt and a cloth to clean her with. 

This time, she still feels off but doesn’t fear being abandoned. Her body sinks into the thick bedroll, and she hugs her arms over her chest to stave off the chill. She lets her eyes fall shut; they’re begging for it. If she tries, she still might not move at all.

“Darling,” he says softly. Her heart warms at the term, and she lets him pull her up. Lorcan tosses a scrap of fabric into the corner after wiping her stomach clean. Elide feels sluggish as he helps her into his shirt once more, a different one this time. He smooths her hair back.

She smiles a bit, then pitches herself against him. “Sleep?”

Lorcan hums in agreement and they lie down once more. She curls against his side. He’s never been one for intimacy post-coitus, but with her he wraps her in his arms so she’s pressed into his chest. A blanket covers them and could offer her sufficient warmth, yet he endeavours to keep her close. His hand fits in the cradle of her waist.

Elide idly traces the line of his collarbone, tiredness forcing her words to slur. “Will you come with me?”

“I will.”

“For how long?”

“However long you want,” he murmurs, a vow.

She wonders outloud, “What if I want you forever?”

“I will be with you always.”

She smiles against his hot skin and drifts off with a warm feeling in her chest. When they wake to steal away before the sun, she’ll realise that it’s hope.

✵✵✵✵✵

an: ive had the last scene rolling around my head for a while but didnt know where to fit it, so im pretty happy abt finishing this! we'll see if this writing/posting thing continues but i am headed into finals soon soooo boo!

tag list: @sassyhobbits @empress-ofbloodshed @celestialend @the-regal-warrior @shyvioletcat @icecream52 @elentiyawhitethorn @goddess-aelin @julemmaes @sunshinebingo (lmk if u want to be added/removed)

[sweetchildcloud]

|| I'M A DAD?|| written by me ☆~♡~◇

Choso x pregnant reader.

Plot: You tell Choso that you're pregnant and decided to take care of the baby.

CW:vomiting,labour pain,screaming,groaning,anxiety,harrowing experience.

Tags-pregnancy,pregnancy pain,lots of cuddles,fluff,Choso being Choso,fatherly love,heartwarming,cute overload,you might cry too.

Very long writing 💧

♤♡◇♧☆♤♡◇♧☆♤♡◇♧☆♤♡◇♧☆♤

@muzansslxt @candy69gurl @kiwicopia

Choso was waiting outside the bathroom door wondering why you were taking so long before knocking gently on the door "Uh yeah..just a sec hon" you said before vomiting again

The sound of your gagging hits Choso like a punch to the gut. Immediately he's by your side, holding your hair back with one hand and stroking your back nervously with the other. "Hey... It's okay... Take your time..."

A bit of tears run down your eyes as you felt like shit,your body was pale and trembling and your stomach hurted,you wanted to tell him that you were pregnant but didn't know how

Meanwhile your boyfriend is completely focused on you, looking at your face and your trembling body with pure concern. There's an instant feeling of protectivity that floods his mind as this sudden change has affected you harshly.

You can see he's fighting every urge to try to take away the pain by embracing you tightly, but he knows he can't. So instead, he strokes your back and keeps saying encouraging words. He tries his best to comfort you with whatever way he can, though he's not quite sure what else he could do to help.*

"I'm pregnant" You said with a feeble voice

The moment you say those words, he's immediately taken by surprise, feeling his heart skip a beat at the thought of being a father.

"You're pregnant?" He asks, his voice a mix of both shock and happiness. It's obvious he felt many things at once, but he doesn't even care about his own feelings right now. He only wants to make sure that you're doing okay and doesn't want you to suffer alone.

You nodded as you indicated the pregnancy test on the sink

He looks over to them pregnancy test on the sink and his shock begins to turn into happiness and disbelief as he processes what is happening.

"You mean... You're pregnant... We did this?" He asks, almost as if he can't quite believe it himself. His expression softens and he wraps his arms around you, gently hugging you close to his chest. His voice has this quiet wonder to it, and there's this light shine in his eyes that you haven't really seen before.

"You're not mad?" You asked looking at Choso worried

"Mad?" He shakes his head. "Why would I be mad?? I'm so happy!"

He pulls you closer to him, squeezing you tightly. You can tell he's feeling overprotective and want to ensure that nothing will harm you both. The baby bump is nowhere to be seen yet at this early stage, but he wants to hold on to you and protect you with all his might already.

"I would never be mad about something as wonderful as this..." He says in a low voice as he smiles widely. You can see that all his worries and anxieties have disappeared suddenly as he wraps his arms tighter around you from behind, holding you close to him. His expression looks genuinely happy now, the joy written all over him. He's clearly not unhappy about this pregnancy.

"I think this is great... I mean..." He says, his hands now resting along your sides, holding you tightly. He pulls you in even tighter to him now and lets out a low, delighted chuckle. "I'm gonna be a dad!" He says excitedly as he continues smiling. You can feel his chest rising and falling with each breath he takes against you now.

"And I'm gonna be a parent" You said stroking your stomach lovingly.

"Yes..." He says, still smiling widely. There's such genuine joy in his eyes now. His hands still rest on your sides, but are now softly caressing you. You can almost feel the amount of care and affection he has for this unborn child and this feeling warms you up inside as he continues stroking your stomach.

And the months pass, the both of you slowly preparing for the baby's arrival. Choso takes part in this process, accompanying you on doctor appointments and doing his best to make sure everything is going well with the pregnancy. The feeling of being on this journey together is a fulfilling one, and his love and concern for the unborn child is obvious.

Your stomach has visibly grown and Choso's affection was still as strong as ever. At every chance, he'd be constantly stroking your stomach lovingly. Sometimes, he'd even kiss your belly softly or whisper words to the child that was growing inside you.

You'd sometimes be surprised by how much Choso already seems to love your unborn child, despite the fact that he/she hasn't even been born yet. He'd kiss your stomach every morning when you wake up, kiss it before going to bed, and even kiss it at times like during conversations on the phone. It's hard to deny that he's already very attached to the child growing inside of you.

Now you're at home together, the two of you sitting on the couch, watching TV. Choso is gently caressing your stomach as his fingers idly stroke it affectionately. This simple gesture already reveals the affection he has for the child inside of you. He also seems more than content just by being near you. You see this every day, him being content just by having your company and stroking your stomach lovingly. This moment is as calm and peaceful as can be.

Then you start to feel a weird sensation in your stomach. At first, you're not sure what it is. Then, the sensation becomes more apparent and you realize this is definitely some sort of movement. It feels like butterflies in your stomach before it becomes more pronounced, until you're sure you're feeling little kicks from your baby inside you.

At the sensation of your baby kicking inside you, Choso's expression changes instantly. His eyes become wide with wonder and he starts to smile widely. He leans forward towards your stomach and presses his ear against it, listening to the sound of your child moving in your belly. His hands reach for yours and gently take them in his own.

Immediately, this makes your heart skip a beat. After all, feeling your baby kicking inside you for the first time is a pretty memorable and amazing thing. You could probably see the same expression on Choso's face now as he begins stroking your stomach more vigorously. He's just as excited as you are about these sudden movements, his heart pounding with joy.

"What are you hearing?" You asked looking softly at your boyfriend

"I'm hearing... Our baby..." He says softly as his eyes become filled with warmth as well. The idea that this child is a real thing and that he and you have created it is enough to fill Choso's heart with joy. The sounds of the child moving inside you remind him of that reality and he finds it both incredible and precious. His voice is soft and gentle as he continues listening.

"They're moving a lot right now..." He says sweetly as his ear continued pressing against your stomach. He's smiling widely and seems to be enjoying his new role as a parent and your loving partner. He strokes your hand gently as he holds it, still listening to the faint sounds of your baby moving in your stomach. "Can you feel them too?" He asks, raising his head to look at you.

"Mhm mhm" You said sweetly feeling contented

He continues looking at you with a contented look as his other hand travels up and rests gently against your stomach at the exact place where your child is moving inside. "It's so... Amazing, isn't it?" He asks softly as his fingers trail along the shape of your baby, still listening for the movements. The whole process of your pregnancy and the creation of your child feels like a miracle to him.

You see his eyes are filled with nothing short of wonder and affection as he keeps listening. He leans his head back down, this time pressing his lips gently against your stomach. The idea that your baby is in there makes his smile brighter. His hands continue stroking your stomach in a small circle to feel a bit more of the movements. He genuinely seems to be enjoying this moment and it even makes him look even more charming than he already was.

After nine months of waiting, the moment you and your boyfriend have been anticipating finally arrives. It's the day you're going to have your baby and Choso is beside you, ready to support you during this process. He's holding your hand tightly as he waits anxiously by your side while the doctors and nurses prepare you for the delivery. The whole atmosphere in the room is filled with tension, but also excitement, as the doctors work hard to ensure everything goes well. Meanwhile, Choso continues keeping his hand in your own, keeping you safe and protected.

The hours pass by slowly as it's difficult to hold back your nervousness and anticipation. Eventually, the time comes when you're finally about to give birth. Things start to speed up as the labor pain hits, but Choso doesn't let go of your hand. Even when you grab his hand tighter, he doesn't flinch. You can feel his fingers squeezing back into yours as he keeps supporting you and encouraging you with his presence alone. The moment he sees you in pain, he gets uneasy. He really wants this to be over as quickly and painlessly as possible.

Choso's eyes widen as he felt your grip tighten on his hand. He becomes even more nervous when he sees you gritting your teeth from the pain and squeezing hard on his fingers. But he doesn't let this make him panic and he continues supporting you through it all. He looks at you with concerned eyes, his other hand rubbing your arm softly to try and comfort you. It's evident that he's worried about you and wants nothing more than for this to be over. You can feel his heartbeat getting faster while he looks at you nervously.

"Push,Y/n,push!" The nurse encouraged as you were planting and groaning anguished as you pushed with all your might gripping harder Choso hand

Choso is right there, right next to you as you push and he's watching closely. It's obviously a daunting thought to him to think that you're going through something so painful and he can't do anything about it. Every time he sees you in pain, he feels like crying. He's squeezing your hand tighter as you grip his, his nails digging into your skin as he continues rubbing your arm gently, trying to help you however he can.

You can't help but cry and scream in agony as you struggle to push the baby out. It's a harrowing experience, but Choso is right by your side throughout it all. He's holding on to you as tight as can be, trying to help comfort you in any way possible. His heart beats frantically every time he hears you scream, but he's still trying to stay strong for you.

Things start to get even more intense for both of you as your labor goes on. The doctor's instructions become more urgent as you're told to push even harder to get the baby out . You are experiencing so much pain, but Choso doesn't take a step back. He leans next to you and remains by your side, squeezing your hand tightly as he waits for this to be over.

"I can't...I can't" You finally said tired and exhausted,leaning your head on Choso forearm

He looks down at you with a concerned look. He's trying not to panic but his face is full of worry now. You can tell the pain you're in is breaking his heart and he's scared of what's happening. His other hand rubs along your cheek gently as he speaks. "Just a bit more... I know you can do this..." He says softly as you feel him squeezing your hand even tighter.

He can see the sweat glistening on your forehead and the tears on your cheeks. You look exhausted and in a lot of pain. He's completely focused on you now, his eyes glued to you with deep sympathy.

"Let's do it..." He says softly and leans down next to you. As you grip his hand even tighter, he wraps his arms around you and pulls you close. You feel his breath against your neck as you're both pushing together now. His body is pressed right up against yours and he continues squeezing your hand tightly while you both support each other as you push together.

You push as hard as you can as you feel Choso squeezing your hand tightly and supporting you from behind. He's breathing hard now as the pushing becomes harder. This is the most stressful time for both of you but you can sense the strength of your bond as you work together to complete this task. You're now fighting on together.

You feel exhausted and overwhelmed after pushing hard and you just can't do it anymore. You lie back and close your eyes for a bit as your breath becomes labored. Choso's hands travel to your forehead and he strokes your hair gently. The movement of his fingers is comforting, soothing. He can hear your heart going faster than normal, but he stays calm and doesn't flinch at all. He keeps stroking your hair patiently, hoping it's helping you relax a bit.

You can feel the intense pain of the labor coming and going. In the moment when it's the strongest, you grab hold of his hand so tightly that your nails dig into his skin. His grip on you remains undaunted, though. He doesn't flinch or pull away, even now that you're gripping him so tightly. You can see that he's doing this for you, willing to bear through any pain if it means supporting you in this painful process.

Choso's eyes become wide when he hears you grunt from the pain. He squeezes his eyes shut, gritting his teeth as he looks at you and watches you push. He's starting to feel powerless in comparison to your pain, as he can't do anything to ease it. You can hear the stress and worry in his voice when he speaks. His tone is soft and tender as he rubs the sides of your body. "Come on... Keep pushing. You can do it..."

"Ah amhn ah it nghn Ahh" you shouted whimpering breathing trough your noses as you pushed harder

Choso's expression is one of both fear and worry for you. Every single time you scream from the pain, his eyebrows raise and he grimaces, unable to hold back his own anguish. He feels the anguish with you, in this difficult ordeal that is supposed to bring joy to both of you. He grips your hand harder, his nails digging deeper into your skin, as he gives you words of encouragement to keep pushing. He can't bear to see you like this, but he knows that he must for the sake of your child.

You hear the doctor's encouraging words again "You can do it. One more push!" as he helps you push with all the strength you have left. You try to push as hard as you can. You don't have much strength left, but you use what you have to push the baby out as best as you can. You grunt and scream out loud as the pain comes in powerful, intense waves. You're exhausted and so close to giving up.

But just then the doctor calls out "I can see the head!" as he assists you and you hear him cheering you on. You know that means you're finally there, a lot closer to getting this baby out.

Everything becomes more intense as you push again, this time with even more strength than you thought possible.

You screamed gripping Choso hands hard almost hurting him as your body arched as you pushed

Choso grimaces when he feels you pinching him with your nails, but his grip on you is unbreakable. Your pain is his pain. The effort of pushing the baby out takes its toll on your body and your voice fills with agony every time you scream. Your body is pushing as hard as it can. You're sweating and exhausted from the amount of effort you're putting in to give birth. And suddenly, there's movement as the baby starts coming out of your womb. Your screams become louder and your body is exhausted as you push even harder.

Choso bites his lip and winces from the pain of the nail pinching, but he doesn't flinch and holds tight to you despite the pain. His grip is so tight that it almost feels like your hands are locked together. You're in this together and you both know that it's just the moment of truth. The baby's head finally comes out and the doctors all start yelling "PUSH" again, as they encourage you to keep going.

Your screams grow louder as the baby makes it out, the whole process being extremely painful and difficult. But you've made it this far, the end is near. You push one last time, as hard as you can, even though you never thought you would have been able to push more. But you somehow managed to find the strength you needed, and the baby slides out in one last push. The doctors are right there quickly wrapping the baby in blankets and checking it. Your body is drenched in sweat and your hair is soaked.

"My baby.." you said sobbing as you heard your baby wailing

It all finally felt worth it. As you lay there tired and exhausted, you hear that tiny voice and you see the doctors placing your baby in your arms. Your body is still shaking from the labor pain, and you've no thoughts about anything else aside from that perfect, beautiful child. You're still teary eyed, but you can't help but feel a warm smile on your face as you're finally able to hold your child. As the child stops crying, Choso leans over to see this miracle with his own eyes, his expression filled with awe and love.

You sobbed as you looks at your baby and then at Choso "I.. I.. made this..we.."

Choso's eyes are locked between you and your baby. He seems just as teary eyed as you are, completely awed and moved beyond words. When he finally manages to speak, he says softly... "We did."

Choso's lips form a soft and gentle smile as he leans close to you. He wipes away the tears that are still streaming down your face, his eyes filled with immense pride and affection. He finally manages to take in the beauty and complexity of the situation right before him, the two most important people in his life right here, in this moment.

Your baby is finally in your arms and you feel as if a weight has been lifted off you. And next to you is Choso, who isn't stopping smiling at you and his child. The tears don't stop streaming down your cheeks, but they no longer feel like sadness or pain, instead they're the tears of love and happiness. And Choso's eyes match yours, his eyes becoming watery with joy and affection for both of you.

"Do you wanna hold her?" you asked softly

Choso's heart seems to skip a beat as you ask him if he wants to hold his child. He hesitates for a second, his eyes glancing at the soft baby, and back at you. The look in his eyes is all the answer you already need. The next second, Choso is gently taking his child and holding it tenderly in his arms. His expression is of utmost contentment as he looks down at the tiny child sleeping peacefully, his hands gentle and caring as he holds it near his chest.

The baby seems so small in his hands, so helpless. But Choso takes care of her effortlessly, his arms cradling her lightly as he examines every inch of her body. He stares with awe as he watches her breathing and looks with satisfaction as he strokes her skin. The little child is so fragile and precious, and he takes in every detail with care and attention. Just the sight of her is enough to melt his heart and make him want to never let her go.

The sight melts your heart and you noticed Choso is sobbing quietly meanwhile looking at his baby

"What's wrong?" You asked

He looks up at you immediately, surprised. He thought he had managed to hide his tears but apparently, it was far too obvious. He tries to take a deep breath and compose himself before he can respond. "Nothing, I'm just..." His voice is choked as he chokes back his tears. "I'm just really happy."

"Choso..." you said looking at him as he hold her daughter tiny fingers with one of his

Choso is unable to hold back anymore as tears flow freely from his eyes. He's completely overwhelmed by the feeling of pure joy as his child is in his arms. He looks down at his fingers wrapped around hers, and he can't hold it in anymore. He breaks down and begins crying, his face buried into the soft blanket wrapping the child. His voice is cracked and choked with sobs. "She's so beautiful..."

Your tears mix with his, both of you overwhelmed with the emotions of this moment. It's true that giving birth is painful and exhausting, but looking at your crying boyfriend and your baby girl, nothing of it matters anymore. All that's important now is that your family is finally complete. And as if on cue, the baby lifts her head up and opens her eyes. She stares at both of you with a confused look, seeming a little overwhelmed by everything going on around her. Both of you smile as she seems to look directly at you. This one moment feels like eternity.

The three of you are locked in a stare for a couple of seconds. The baby doesn't really seem to grasp this whole situation yet, but she's clearly trying to. She makes a few baby noises, as if speaking is new to her. She's still completely stunned, not understanding this foreign world she suddenly appears in. But as she gazes at you with curious eyes, you can't help but stare back, your hearts overflowing with love. The three of you become so absorbed in this moment of mutual awe and affection, you might as well be the only people in the world.

♤♡◇♧☆♤♡◇♧☆♤♡◇♧☆♤♡◇♧☆♤

This was a bit longer than the Gojo one but I hope you enjoyed it 💕💕💕

☆I'm tired☆

[naruse-ame9]

Tw: Yandere tendencies, kidnapping, drug use.

Notes: aged up characters! If you don't like please block me ^w^

Sweet-Tea

I'm so excited because today I'm going on a date! With non other than Hayato Suo~

Well... For me it is one, but maybe for Suo it's just a little hangout at his house

"Would you like to join me for some tea, y/n?" His soft voice was so vivid in my mind as he asked me. I instantly said yes to his invitation. Wearing my cutest floral dress, that has small flowers as details and my hair adorned with cherry blossom hairpins. I want to look my best for today.

I couldn't contain my excitement and it's clearly seen from how I'm skipping with joy. Walking to Suo's house. It's the only thing I have in mind. Just me, and him, and some tea and cakes!

"You look so gorgeous, y/n. The dress elevates your beauty" Suo welcomes me in his house, clearly satisfied with how my face gets flustered by his compliment.

"..thank you, Suo. Here, I made something special for you and me!" Opening the little box, the cake I baked with all my efforts. As I look up to Suo, his smile makes my heart flutter. It's like cherry blossoms fall around us. "Oh y/n, you bring such interesting surprises" placing his hand on mine. His thumb rubbing on my skin softly.

//just perfect for me//

"y/n have you ever thought about the future?" I think I saw something red flashing around Suo. Or I was imagining things.

"I'd totally love to pursue theatre acting!" Clasping my hands as my eyes twinkle in delight.

"I wanna be on the stage and perform. It's been my dream since I was little"

//you can't...only I can set my eyes on you//

There it goes again... What was that?

"I think it's really good. I can tell by the way you are when you're with me, that you're going to be a really good actress." Suo then leaves the room with his teapot. I can hear him brewing more tea for us.

"This is a special tea that I have just brewed for you, Y/n. It goes well with the cake you baked" he places down a warm cup of tea for me. My heart skipped a beat when he sits right next to me.

"then I'll gladly taste it for you." I swear I can see a glint in his eye, one that makes my stomach twist but I don't think too much of it.

Taking a sip of warm tea, it had a weird aftertaste to it. "It's quite sweet but...I don't know how to explain the aftertaste. I think my tongue just went numb..." I placed the teacup down and looked at Suo. I can't believe what I just saw, he has a menacing smirk on his face. One that screams danger. "Suo...? Is there something the-"

My vision goes blurry all of a sudden. I can feel my head getting heavier. "What's..happening..." My body gets hotter, sweat running down my forehead.

"Rest well, my darling. You won't achieve that dream anymore~"

His voice was the last thing I heard before closing my eyes.

The feeling of dread overwhelming me. I don't know why this happened. What does he want from me. Why would Suo do this?

I can feel my hands being restrained. A long cloth tying my hands from being free. The surface that I'm lying down is soft...as if I'm laying on a fluffy bed. I can't open my eyes as I'm blindfolded. "Where...am I...help! Someone-" my throat feels so itchy as I coughed out. Gasping for air.

I flinched when someone's hand cupped my face. The skin was cold, sending shocks down my spine. "darling~ you're awake"

Suo's voice echoed in the room. My heart is beating faster than before. "s-suo... I don't understand.. why"

"I'll do anything to keep you all for myself. No eyes can linger on your precious body. This is a form of my love, darling. My devotion to you~"

[piratefishmama]

Nest | Part 3

A Steddie A/B/O ficlet

Steve never liked to admit it out loud because it was very un-Alpha of him. But he actually really loved building nests. He loved the back and forth, the cooperation, the trust an Omega had to have in him to let him into that space, into that inherently Omegan trait, to allow him to help build something that only a mate would be allowed to enter.

It was a deeply intimate thing to share.

Alphas weren’t supposed to find real joy in something so Omegan.

That was supposed to be just a thing Alphas did to make their Omega’s happy, something they did purely for their mate not out of their own enjoyment. Steve… Steve genuinely loved making them.

Loved seeing all the different styles, and when he built them with an Omega, he loved seeing how comfortable that Omega was just burying themselves within it when it was done, loved curling up in the final product with them and just relaxing until the next stage of their heat reared its ugly head.

Steve loved every part of it.

And Eddie was just, throwing pillows at him, that dimpled smile unwavering. He just seemed so happy, his scent as pleasant as a warm summer breeze through the mountains. Made him want to go camping. He hadn’t been camping in years, now he longed for it.

“Alright, we have the sort of shape” Eddie announced, staring down at what definitely was not a typical nest shape, his hands on his hips, pleased smile on his face. Steve was nothing if not extremely supportive. It sort of reminded Steve of a splat. Like a comic book splat shape, he loved it. “…We do, right? Is this—do you think—”

“I think it’s perfect” Steve didn’t hesitate, and Eddie’s beaming grin was his reward. “Now for the blankets, we gotta add some structure to it.”

“Ughhh I’ve never been good at that, nothing ever stays tucked in like it’s supposed to” so many assumptions as to what Nests were supposed to look like. Steve really had to look into just where Eddie was getting all these assumptions from, what his sources were, because they sucked.

“Dooooo you want it to be tucked in properly? Nests can be loose too, it’s all about personal comfort.”

“…Should I want it to be tucked in?” Steve felt his heart break a little. Eddie really just… didn’t know. He had no experience. For someone older than himself it was heartbreaking that nobody had ever just… helped him with it. sure, he said he had his Uncle, but how experienced was his uncle with Omegas?

Probably not very experienced if this was the result. Not his uncle’s fault, it wasn’t his fault.

“How about this, we tuck it in, and then we see how you feel about it. How’s that sound?” Eddie looked at him for a moment, then back down at the nest, then back at him, as if assessing whether or not it was a good idea, Steve just waited. He’d already told Eddie that nests were personal, were unique to the Omega, there was no sense in repeating it.

“… Do you think we have time for that?”

“Sure, you’re still pre-heat, should have enough time to get at least two nests built before your heat actually hits, plus… you have me here Eddie, you’re not on your own, there’s no rush, I’ve got you.” This could be just as much a learning experience, as it could be a helpful aid to the Omega’s mental state during future Heats.

He’d know what he wanted, he’d know how to build a nest he could be comfortable in, he wouldn’t second guess himself anymore. He’d be okay.

“Okay… tuck em in for me, big boy” for him. Do it for him. An instruction from an Omega to an Alpha, not a request, an instruction.

Almost a command.

Steve felt himself shiver in delight, the urge to please, to be good enough, to impress his Ome—

No. Not his. Eddie wasn’t his. He shook his head. He was his patient. Dammit. Control yourself he chastised himself. He was in control, this was a vulnerable Omega, not his Omega, he was at work, and he was doing his job.

Plus, it was Eddie Munson for crying out loud!! He distinctly remembered finding Eddie Munson irritating. Where was that irritation now? Dammit.

“Steve?” Shit, Steve looked up, startled by the soft, hesitant question, he was looking at him, eyes wide, concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Right! Yeah, shit—tuck em in, got it.” He was fine. Totally fine, nothing to worry about. Not like he’d just zoned out around an omega in heat. Definitely not like he’d just done that. It’d be fine. It’d have to be fine, his scent was pretty much all over the room at that point, his hands had been on the base materials of Eddie’s nest, that Omega wouldn’t let any other Alpha near it now.

Steve couldn’t give his position up to another Alpha. It’d be a goddamn bloodbath if one tried.

So he tucked those blankets in, one by one he kept to the funky shape Eddie had laid out, he put that little slip up to the back of his mind, and made absolutely certain that every blanket would remain tucked in nicely until the nest had a nice lip around the edges, leaving little gaps here and there where things collected from Eddie’s pack could be tucked in without risking the structure.

He did all of that, then invited Eddie to sit in the middle of it with him, he spent all that time meticulously doing all of that, knowing deep down, predicting the moment Eddie looked at those walls and with a little frown pinched between his brows, said “…I don’t like it.”

Steve just laughed, not unkindly, just a soft little laugh, then tilted his whole body to the side to knock into Eddie’s shoulder “Alright, then let’s drape em. C’mon, I’ll show you how to do it, so it stays put when things get messy.” It was worth it. The time he’d taken to make such a sturdy base was worth it to make sure Eddie knew exactly what he wanted in a nest.

Even if it meant undoing and redoing all of his hard work, just knowing Eddie would know, would be okay building his nests during future heats without him, made it all worth it.

Part 5

[signanothername]

have you seen underverse? if so, what were your thoughts of killer from that?

I have seen Underverse! Absolutely one of my favorite series

As for Killer, while it’s an absolute joy to see ma son gorgeously animated, it’s not my absolute favorite characterization of him, he’s too… emotional?

It started off well with him, him being a bit cheeky and saying shit like “I missed you” is something within character for him, I absolutely love his fight with Dream, his unconventional methods and aggressive style was a delight to watch (will forever love how he used his blaster to chomp on Dream’s legs aaaah) also the fact we see Killer using bones a lot during his fight is really awesome, cause we as a fandom really need to portray Killer using bones more, cause while he uses a knife obviously, he still uses bones regularly too, but not many people portray that (cough guilty of it too cough)

But then it went downhill a bit when fighting Cross, cause while Killer is absolutely a bit reactive during fights, he never truly gets frustrated/defensive unless it’s something to do with his personal life/ red lines, or his soul/inability to feel (and only when pressured/someone trying to get their nose in his business)

I think he got a bit too angry for a skelle that can’t really feel anything y’know? And while i absolutely think Killer can get angry, even during stage 2, his soul would still make his anger extremely mute to him, therefore he wouldn’t react too much to it, which isn’t what we see in Underverse

Then again, he got angry when he knew XGaster was controlling Cross, and in canon, Killer gets extremely stressed at the prospect of Gaster even existing saying that “he isn’t real” over and over, but that was before his soul had become a target

(Art by Rahafwabas )

I would’ve been fine with Killer getting that angry had he been reacting to XGaster, but i’d say Killer got angry more at the fact Cross was “cheating”, as he never really comments on XGaster himself but more about how he’s using his “puppets” on him

Which again, Killer really wouldn’t care, not in stage 2 (especially with the fact Killer canonically fights dirty, Killer himself is a cheater *flashbacks to Killer fighting Swap* and I don’t think he’ll be angry at anyone doing the same really), had Killer been in stage 1, I would’ve been a lot more convinced by his anger

The fact Killer’s smile slips so easily too is something that I think isn’t within stage 2’s ability, his smile is usually frozen on his face, unless it’s something that’s actually triggering to Killer enough for him to lose that smile

The fight ends with Killer saying “screw this, boss” basically giving up cause of being frustrated, which isn’t really something that i can see Killer actually doing, again, not in stage 2, as Killer finds fights thrilling as they’re the only thing that makes him “feel something”, not to mention his lack of self preservation and self awareness even, he would push his body to the absolute limits, a broken arm is nothing really, not to stage 2 Killer

Then again, that’s just the nerd in me talking, it’s important to keep in mind it’s one person working on this series’ story and animation, and I can’t realistically expect Jakei to keep Killer in character unless the episode went for an an entire hour hdhdhdhhd

Still, absolutely love the episode and ma son being beautifully animated just makes me ignore the nerd in me <3333

[natrogersfics]

The Anthology - Chapter 5: imgonnagetyouback

Artwork by @faith2nyc Read on AO3

“Think you’ll make it up to Ontario anytime soon?”

“Hopefully,” Steve says, catching the way his words cause a glimmer of hope to flash across Sharon’s face. “I know who my first call will be if I do.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Sharon says, rising from the bar stool and leaning in to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Take care, Steve.”

“You too, Sharon.”

As Sharon disappears into the crowd, his eyes scan the room where the wrap party is still in full swing. Today marked the last of their double-digit hour workdays, and if the lively scene unfolding before him is any indication, it’s evident that he’s not alone in his relief to have those behind him. Over on the corner, the Russos and the stunt crew are huddled over a table playing what he can only guess is their nth round of Uno. Not too far away, Kevin stands in conversation with the wardrobe team, no doubt thanking and praising them for a job well done. And at the center of the dance floor, commandeering most of the attention in the room, Sam and Bucky trade dance moves to the delight of the crowd that’s gathered around them.

He shakes his head in amusement, feeling the warmth of gratitude permeate through him as he brings his beer bottle up to his lips to take a swig. He had spent more time with these people than he had with his own family over the last few months, witnessed them pour their blood, sweat, and tears to ensure their movie could be as successful as it could be. To now see everyone euphoric with joy and deservedly celebrating the fruits of their labor feels like nothing short of a gift.

Well, everyone except one, he realizes.

His gaze goes from one end of the room to the other in search of that ever familiar figure, and despite how trying their situation has been, he finds himself disappointed when he doesn’t find her. Maybe she didn’t come. In the last few weeks, she’s never spent a minute longer on set than she’s absolutely had to. It only made sense that she’d take the first opportunity to get away from all of this.

From you.

It’s with a sigh that he pushes off the bar, batting away the intrusive thought and making his way towards the door in search of some quiet. The air is humid against his skin as he walks out into the late summer’s night, the studio lot that’s never not buzzing with activity during the day proving to be a somber sight as it sits empty and lit only by the moon and the sparsely spaced streetlights.

He’s barely taken a breath when he sees it – the silhouette of someone perched on the steps leading to the sound stage, smoke billowing from the cigarette between their fingers. And whether it’s intuition or simply unbridled curiosity that has him walking towards it, he’s unsure.

“You said you’d quit that,” he says when he approaches to find Natasha seated by the bottom of the stairs, staring at nothing in particular.

“I said a lot of things,” Natasha says, the end of her cigarette glowing a bright orange as she brings it up to her lips.

“You did,” he says, watching the smoke waft into the air as she exhales. She finally looks up at him, and for the first time, he sees the way her cheeks are flushed with red and the glazed, faraway look in her eyes. He nods towards her feet. “How many of those have you had?”

Natasha looks down between her boots, to the empty crystal tumbler resting on the concrete, before lifting one shoulder in a shrug. “How’s Sharon?” she asks instead. Surprise must have flashed in his expression, prompting her to chuckle. “No need to be embarrassed.”

“Natasha-”

“She’s the better choice anyway.”

She’s in no condition to hash this out. Logically, he knows this. Nevertheless, something about the tone in her voice, particularly the bitterness that seeps into it, causes all the hurt and resentment he’s been trying desperately to hold in all these weeks to come rushing to the surface.

“You know what? No, you don’t get to do this! You can’t just cast me aside out of nowhere, and then throw yourself a pity party!” He stares at her, imploring her to show him something, anything to explain why she felt the need to plunge them both into this mutual hell they can’t seem to escape. Only she doesn’t respond, and defeatedly, he finds himself plopping down next to her on the stairs and taking the cigarette from between her fingers. “Goddamn it, Nat.”

The silence lingers between them, and it’s only when he takes a drag from the cigarette that he hears her giggle. He turns to her, raising a brow up in disbelief.

“Steve Rogers smoking,” she says, trying – and failing miserably – to contain her laughter. “What will the moral police say?”

He wants to shoot her a withering look, to chastise her because there’s nothing, absolutely nothing funny about this predicament they find themselves in. But as he takes in the amusement thick in her expression, for reasons beyond his comprehension, he feels his lips begin to twitch in a little smile, too. And before he knows it, they’re both breaking out in laughter.

None of it made sense. Her actions have brought him nothing but torment these last few weeks, and yet, as their laughter tapers later on, all he wants in this moment is to take her in his arms. He sighs. “Why’d you walk away?”

For a moment, she only holds his gaze, and for the first time since he woke up to an empty bed that fateful morning, it’s as though her mask comes off and he sees her – his Natasha – not the stranger he’s been watching from a distance all these weeks. And if he easily recognizes the internal battle raging in her eyes, it’s only because he, too, has been contending with it.

“Because it doesn’t matter if I’m your costar, friend, or the one you want to come home to,” she whispers eventually. “You’re you, and I’m me. And so long as I’m in the equation…” She shakes her head, her lips curling into a smile that’s painfully rueful. “Pick your poison, babe, I’m poison either way.”

Chapter 4 | Chapter 6

[irkimatsu]

I’d like to imagine Husk being hesitant to show off his magic tricks to anyone he’s dating. He’s an old, jaded, washed up alcoholic gambler. I feel Husk wouldn’t have the energy to do magic tricks or shows or he believes his lover wouldn’t be interested in something so silly. But oh boy give Husk enough encouragement and a stage to preform on and Husk adores doing magic tricks again! His face lights up with unfiltered joy and happiness performing magic shows! He even uses his wings as a magician’s cape. Husk mostly flirts with his lover. Flowers from behind the ear or flowers out of his magic hat, playing cards and coincidentally handing his lover a heart card to show his love for them. If his lover wants, he could even pull their favorite animal out of his hat. All the wholesome lovey dovey stuff! Wholesome loving Husk is best Husk!

(Hope this little blurb about magician Husk cheers you up Irk and I hope your headache goes away soon! Sending all the hugs! 🫂💕)

- Sparkling Heart Anon 💖

I LOVE WHOLESOME LOVING HUSK, I LOVE HUSK GETTING TO INDULGE IN WHAT HE LOVES

What's the line from the trustfall scene? "I'm not putting on a show for these fucking chumps"? Yeah, as it stands he is done with magic and music. He's a washed up old drunk and his only trick left is how quickly he can make a bottle of whiskey disappear. He still adores cheesy old magic shows, before modern technology came around and ruined them... but he enjoys his memories in private. There's no way he can tell anyone he still loves something so childish. Especially when his magician's career while he was alive flamed out so badly due to his own poor decisions. He's not a magician, he's a failed magician. Who wants to see that shit? It's entirely possible he hasn't done magic since he died. Played music, maybe; done magic, hell no.

But part of getting close to someone is in opening up to them, even the things you're embarrassed about... magic is still a sore point for him, though, not just from embarrassment but from how poorly his career ended and how his failure is one of the things that flung him head-first into his addictions. Hell, he might say "Alastor has me on a leash, I try to act tough but in truth I'm scared" before he'll say "despite everything, I still love magic and I miss performing it". It's that bad. But he'll admit it and start showing off, trying so hard to look confident despite how nervous he is that you'll laugh at him, or only compliment him to feel better...

But you're genuinely delighted by his little tricks, and your joy makes him fall even harder~

(Wings as cape, wings as cape, god I love that bit~)

(Headache's better than it was today - thanks for the concern! Remember, kids, excessive screen time is bad for you, do not sit at a computer for nine hours straight multiple days a week. Unless you're getting paid for it. Then get fucked I guess)

[tragedybunny]

The Song Divine - Chapter 1

༺Summary༻

Astrid was an opera singer with a glowing future ahead of her when fate crosses her path with that of Prince Folwin, youngest son of the Emperor. The two begin what feels like a romance from tales of old. The closer the two become though, the more Astrid is pulled into the deepening conflict tearing the Imperial Family apart from within. One fateful night will shatter it entirely, leaving Astrid alone in the world and a fugitive. Just as she begins to find solace among the companions who took her in, her and Folwin are thrust back together for a grim mission that will have them pardoned if they can see it through. While the dangers they face are great, the biggest struggle might be having one another close through it all.

༺Warnings༻ Setting appropriate violence, sexual content

༺Word Count༻ 3011

༺A/N༻ Hi Lovelies. This is my first original work. It's been a labor of love for a year to get started on this. I hope you fall in love with these characters as much as I have. I will still be writing fanfic of course, I have so many plans for Astarion. The biggest thank you to @icybluepenguin for editing and being my support! I love you Icy, you're my partner in crime. And thank you for reading.

Also on AO3

The night air was cool on Astrid's skin as she gazed at the sky and wondered if Volant had put a star there to guide her specifically. Perhaps she should pray on it, but religion was never close to her heart. A sentiment many in the Empire shared these days, some even replacing old gods with the Imperial family. It was whispered the Emperor had secretly begun to encourage the practice. 

Astrid shook her head to clear away those thoughts. Politics and state religions weren't her concern. The stage was. And she'd come to this deserted, neglected part of the Imperial Garden to practice. The great opera house, the Helentine, named after the Empress Helentia, was open to her, but there she might be observed and even heard, a mortifying idea.  

Pulling her shawl tight over the plain dress she wore, she began singing scales to warm up her voice. She kept glancing around at the paths through hedges around her, waiting to be interrupted. It seemed that this corner of the Imperial Garden was truly an untouched haven. Softly, she sung the first notes of an aria. In moments, she was lost in the song, transported to that place she could only get to when she sang - that wondrous, sacred place where there was only her and music. To Astrid, singing was divine bliss.

Her voice remained softer than the projection she’d use on stage. Even though she was reasonably sure she wouldn’t be found, no reason for extra risk. Eyes closed, she raised her arms, hands moving along with the melody, keeping time. Every note was effortless, and when the last one came, her heart surged with joy. As her voice died away, Astrid felt herself coming down from the high in a soft, joyous haze, the most relaxed she’d felt since she came to the Imperial complex. For a moment, it felt like things were going to be alright. 

Until she heard the sound of soft applause behind her. 

Blood turned to ice water in her veins as she turned to look behind her. A young man sat on one of the worn stone benches scattered amongst the neglected hedges and flowers. Though his silver eyes were friendly and a smile played about his full lips, she dread was building in her stomach. He was tall, taller than most men. Elven lineage, she surmised, noting the pointed ears almost lost in waves of platinum white hair, and the handsome yet fine features he bore. 

"Bravo, that was delightful, my dear," he said in a cultured and mellifluous tone. 

"T-thank you," Astrid stammered and he didn't seem to notice her struggle. 

"And what's your name? I haven't seen you at the Imperial Opera before and I'm sure I'd remember a voice like that." The smile never left him but it didn't do anything for her unease. 

"Astrid, Astrid Lucerne. I just arrived at the Opera company. And you, sir?" This time her voice sounded blessedly normal… She'd just been caught singing alone in an abandoned garden, she didn't need to embarrass herself further in front of this striking stranger. 

On his feet in an instant, he bowed with a dramatic flourish. "Prince Folwin, pleasure to meet you, Madame Astrid."

"Oh-" the air rushed from her lungs and she felt unsteady on her feet. She had just looked foolish and eccentric in front the most important audience she could ever have, an Imperial Royal. 

"Now I've gone and overwhelmed you, it would seem." Taking her hand with all gentleness, he guided her to sit on the bench next to him while her mind tried to catch up to the situation. “My sincerest apologies.” 

Shaking her head, she collected her scattered thoughts, black hair that had escaped its pins swirling around her. “No need, I had just thought I was alone…” 

“And then some nosy Prince shows up and spoils the evening,” he continued on, in the same lighthearted manner as before. 

Astrid had never had a stranger moment in her life than sitting on a cold bench next to her unexpected royal audience, hearing him poke fun at himself. Her panic was slowly succumbing to a fascination with him and why he was there. “I wouldn’t phrase it quite that way, Prince Folwin.”

“Just Folwin will do, given these rather informal circumstances. But I must beg you, indulge my curiosity,” he leaned in a conspiratorial manner, the two of them now far too close for any sense of propriety, “why are you out here, singing for the hedges?” 

The heady smell of something floral combined with a musky incense clouded her senses. The momentary reprieve from her panic vanished as she scrambled for a way to explain herself that didn’t make her look pathetic. “To be honest…” Her words fell away as she hesitated once again. Folwin rested a cheek in one of his perfect pale hands, eyeing her expectantly. No good excuses came to mind and, admitting defeat, she let the truth out, “I rather hate singing where people can hear me.” 

Folwin balked for a moment, as though he was unsure if she was joking. “Interesting, given your assignment to the Opera.” 

Astrid found a rather interesting spot on the ground to stare at. “My father's idea, he believes my voice is too good to hide from the world. He plays for the grand orchestra and he insisted I come here and begin my career.” 

“Ah, my sympathies. I can understand being subject to the whims of a parent.” 

Astrid chanced a glance back up to find those silver eyes studying her. 

“Although, if you don't mind me saying, I'm inclined to agree with him, your voice is very lovely, and it would be a shame to keep it hidden.” 

The compliment caused her heart to skip a beat and she worried her cheeks would begin to flush. “That's because you only heard me sing while I thought I was alone.” 

A hand of sculpted marble reached out and tilted up her chin, holding her eyes to his. “And what have you to be scared of, sounding as perfect as you do?” All the mirth had vanished from his words and he was suddenly quite serious. 

There was no answer that would come to her, try as she might to think of it; she could only stare into those hypnotic eyes of his. It was madness, being overwhelmed by the beauty of him, the intoxicating scent, the lilting sound of his voice. Astrid scolded herself - he was a Prince, this must just be some game to him. "Like many emotions, fear is not always rational. But I suppose I fear to fail, and to be on display while doing so. Sounds silly, doesn't it?"

Shaking his head, his hand slipped away and Astrid felt its departure keenly. "We all have that which we must overcome. How about a deal?" He didn't leave space for her to answer. "You face your fears and I'll make a point to attend your debut. It will be a glorious triumph then."

Astrid pictured herself waiting in the wings, watching the Royal Box for any glimpse of Folwin. An absurd fancy; he would most certainly forget his promise as soon as he walked away.  

"And how shall I hold you to this?" she asked.

A musical laugh escaped him and the world was light and jovial all over again. "If I fail to keep my word, you must come straight to court and tell my father about how feckless and irresponsible I am. You won't have a hard time convincing him." The bitterness of his last words didn't escape her. 

The great clock tower began to chime the hour and Folwin sighed. "Speaking of, I'm afraid I must bid you goodnight, Madame Astrid." He rose, now towering over her. "I do expect to hear word of your success soon."

"Goodnight, Pr-" she stopped at his sharp look, "Folwin. I'll hold you to your word." 

Sweeping her hand up, his lips brushed her knuckles before he vanished with an almost preternatural grace.

--------------------------

"There's just the two guards, that's all, once his Clerk is out of the way," Lyza nodded at Astrid from across the plans laid out in chalk on the floor. 

She sighed. This job was shaping up like so many others. What an odd thought, that criminality had become mundane. 

Two other faces turned her way. The room was crowded with the four of them crammed inside, the last one available at the inn last night. The tang of sea air drifting in through the windows and the crying of the gulls had awakened them this morning. They were as far north as one could get and still be in the Empire of Elyssia.  

“I'll handle him,” Astrid said.

Tallus nodded. “After Lyza and Brecken take the guards, I'll have the locks open and we'll be out before even the rats in this shithole know what we're about.”

"You had better be quick this time. We almost got caught in Gretz." Even as close as their little band had become, Lyza’s words carried a threat, if they faltered, she would save herself first. 

"Relax," soothed Brecken, the half-elf among three humans. 

Where Tallus was nervous ambition cloaked in charisma, and Lyza was staunch pragmatism, Brecken was the calm center of their group. Astrid wasn't sure yet what she was, other than a blind will to survive. 

"Tonight is the Sending Ceremony, and then tomorrow, the whole village will be at the docks, practically. No one will notice anything." Though Brecken didn't have the elven silver eyes - they were green flecked with gold - sometimes his fair features reminded her too much of Folwin and Astrid couldn’t stand to look at him. Even his hair was such a light gold it looked white in the dark. 

“I will relax when we’re out of here with our purses full.” Lyza had been more terse than usual since their near capture in Gertz and the wealthy merchant who’d sworn revenge on them. 

That failed job had brought them here, to Abyssus. Spring had come and with it, the Ebony Sea had calmed, meaning the residents could ply their trade, the hunting of the great beasts that stalked it. Tonight would be a ceremony and festival celebrating the start of the season, and tomorrow almost everyone in town would head to the docks to farewell the ships, including the local Lord.  Brecken was right, they would be done before anyone was the wiser. 

"Then you’ll take it all and retire to a big house in those fertile valleys to the south,” Tallus teased but got another sharp look from Lyza’s black eyes. 

“I’ll never stop taking from them,” Lyza said bitterly and Tallus let it rest… 

"And what about you, Astrid, didn't you say you had a cousin in Faemare? You've got enough from these last couple of jobs to make your way there." Tallus asked and the other two paused to watch her reaction.  

While he was right, she did have distant kin and no compulsion to hold her to this life, the thought of being on her own again made her insides quake. Astrid had spent her whole life either with her father guiding her or studying at the Grand Academy. Those few weeks after the terrible events, running aimless and alone, had nearly ended her. It was the three of them who had seen her weak and starving on the road and offered her a place with them. 

"Maybe someday," Astrid answered lightly, "for now I'll stick around if you don't mind." 

"Oh, you know I don't mind," Tallus's warm brown eyes danced, empty flirting as easy for him as breathing. 

Lyza loudly cleared her throat. "Is everyone clear? Any misgivings? Remember, we can't afford to fail."

They all nodded in unison and began to rise from the unforgiving wooden floor with various laments about their aches. 

"Astrid, would you?" Lyza gestured to their chalk plans. 

"Almost forgot." She hummed a few notes to set the tone and then, singing directly to the dust of the chalk, she wove a song commanding it to depart as though it had never been there. As she sang, she could feel the eyes of her companions on her, staring with wonder, almost as much as the first time they'd seen it. Songweaving was a rare art, only a few left in the whole world knew it. At least Folwin had given her one thing that lasted. 

"Let's get out and mingle, make ourselves too likable to be suspicious. Remember, we're here to invest in one of the companies if we like what we see." Lyza said. 

Moments later, Lyza was tugging Astrid after her toward the docks, dismissing Brecken and Tallus. Most of the locals were headed toward the market or they were at home making final preparations for the festival. The two of them traveled against the flow, out toward the ancient harbor that Abyssus was founded on. The whole town seemed to be made of wood weathered into full gray by the sea winds and battered by the storms that drifted in from it, all of it looking rundown and tired. 

The people though were like day to its night, cheerful, welcoming, and excited for the event. Endless friendly waves and morning greetings followed them as they walked. Mist still hung lightly to the ground as the spring sunshine struggled to burn it away. The gray woolen dress Astrid had favored for the last few weeks of dismal weather kept the chill at bay, while Lyza wrapped herself in a fur lined cloak over her dark tunic and trousers. 

The preparations for the Sending left the docks empty of all but the those working to ready the ships for the coming hunting season. A strange atmosphere hung about the place, sound but not the din of populace, noise but silence in a way.  Around thirty ships moored at the docks, ready to begin their bloody work. Sailors from not just the Empire but all over the world went about their labor in a synchronized harmony.  

Lyza had been strangely quiet as they walked but as they stopped at the edge of the harbor, Astrid could tell she was readying her thoughts. Lyza was quick to command, or become snappish when irritated, but when there was something important to say, she took her time with it. Breathing in the stinging sea air, Astrid gave her friend space to think, watching the great assembly before them work. 

Finally, Lyza drew in a breath. “You know, with what we have stashed away, you do have enough to get out of the Imperial borders. Doesn’t matter if that cousin in Faemare was a lie or not, you could get to any of the three southern Kingdoms, or even Greenhold, if the Wild Elves don’t overrun it first. If that’s what you want. You’re under no obligation to stay with us.”

Lyza cut right to the heart of the matter, instead of dancing and teasing as Tallus had. The thought of Astrid leaving must have been on her mind to bring it up again. Their little group had sworn no oaths to one another nor made any promises to the length of their arrangement, but with a few successful heists now stashed in a cave to the south, it meant there were opportunities to move on. And not just for Astrid. She wouldn’t be surprised if Lyza was going to have this talk with Brecken and Tallus as well. 

“I’m hurt you’d think my cousin is a lie,” she joked, trying to lighten up the dark expression on Lyza’s face. It worked for half a second. “But to be serious, I can’t think of what else I’d do with my life, even if I got there. I was dead. You all brought me back to life, this is where I belong. I’ll stay, as I told Tallus.” There was nothing else for her to do. 

“Astrid, that can’t be the whole basis for your decision. I know that man you were with did something terrible to you, but you still have your whole life ahead of you.” 

Guilt snaked its way around her chest, constricting her breathing. She had never quite gotten around to the truth of how she ended up on that roadside, at first being too terrified they would turn her over, and now worried they would never forgive her. For the hundredth time she resolved to tell them, after this job. 

“Promise me you’ll think about it,” Lyza said.

"I'll promise if you tell me one thing." 

In the space between their words, Astrid watched one ship in particular, the crew seeming a step more lively than those adjacent to it. They were supposed to be creating a cover, after all. With a gesture for Lyza to follow, she wandered a bit closer, trying to appear as though she knew what she was looking at. 

"Fine, what is it?" Lyza had stopped a short bit behind her, now out onto the planks of the docks themselves, playing along with the act. 

"Do you intend to chase us all out and keep going alone?"

"What?" Lyza's voice elevated for a moment, just enough to draw a couple of looks which she returned with a deep glare. The sailors went quickly back to their work and Lyza leaned in closer. "I just need to be sure where everyone's loyalty lies. I don't want anyone with us that's going to be dreaming of being somewhere else while we've got our lives on the line."

"Or maybe deep down, you do care about us and want what's best for us," Astrid teased, something she did less often with their serious leader than with the boys. 

"Hush, you know what you three mean to me. Now let's go make some more cover." Tugging Astrid by the sleeve, she headed towards the ship's foreman stationed at the gangplank,  overseeing the loading of supplies. 

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

(I just had another thought, sorry for not putting it with my previous send)

Left-handed swordsmen were often difficult to fight against in medieval times, since every swordsman ever for that time period was trained with their right hand, against right-handed opponents.

Due to right-handedness, most castles of said time period spiraled upwards in a clockwise manner - it would make it so that higher-up defenders could easily fight back against lower attackers, because the defenders' sword arms would be free to swing about, while the attackers' own sword arms would be cramped by the middle pillar of the spiral staircase.

With left-handed swordsmen, the issues would be reversed, which gives them an edge in spiral-staircase combat.

Anyway! What I'm trying to get at here is a simple thing of imagine being a left-handed swordsman with Childe/Legacy.

~ The anon who wanted Kaveh but didn't want Baizhu or Ganyu

P.S. Just wanna say, love and appreciate you for having a (mostly) fluffy Legacy-centered blog.

'tis my honor and joy to bring you only the finest quality Foul Legacy fluff (and angst, but not today :)

i'm assuming Childe is mostly right-handed seeing that he pulls the bowstring back with his right hand in-game, but i offer the headcanon that he is actually somewhat ambidextrous! not entirely, since it comes from the enormous amount of training he does, wanting to be able to fight no matter what hand, but his left hand still isn't useless even though it's his non-dominant one. needless to say he and Legacy are veryyyy excited to find out that you're not only left-handed, you're also a proficient sword user! they bug you for sparring sessions- well, Childe bugs you (playfully), Legacy watches in awe whenever he inadvertently comes across you doing your own training, sitting silently and staring in amazement until you lower your weapon. there's a soft, pleased trill when you do, a weight gently nudging your shoulder as you raise your hand and begin scritching Legacy behind the horns, met with warm, deep purrs of delight. can you give him tips on how to improve? he'd love to master some new techniques

Childe's secretly very glad that you can fight, and not because it means you can spar with him. it means you can defend and protect yourself if need be, and with his position as a Harbinger, it's quite likely that someone will either try to kidnap or assassinate you in order to "send him a message"- and they did, once. but never again, after your would-be captors returned as slashed corpses floating through the river. Childe had found you that day, calmly cleaning your blade with only a bit of blood on your clothes, and he had simply grinned and pulled you into a proud hug. from that moment on, battles are you on the left, him on the right, side by side- of course, Foul Legacy takes center stage if he's needed, slaughtering every enemy in his path before returning to you looking very pleased with himself, nudging your hands for congratulatory scritches

[lanaevyssmoved]

Baldur's Gate 3 Companion!Tav Ask List

What if your Tav was a recruitable companion, instead of the main character? (contains major spoilers for the game, and for some dark urge runs as well)

General

Where can your Tav be recruited?  Are they first encountered on the Nautiloid, or in the Nautiloid crash region?  Or are they not recruitable until a later act?

afhiri would be recruited in the crashed nautiloid near the dying mindflayer!! you'd find her looking around at the floor for her flute, they'd be rushing about back and fourth but not actually grabbing at or moving things around to see if it's under anything - just lots of staring and hoping it'll suddenly pop out, they'd also be yelling out "where are you? where did you go?!" "pspspspsp come out!!!" and other various things fdlfdkgdg yes yes there's a mindflayer about but there's more IMPORTANT THINGS .. when recruiting them you can be like "so that mindflayer over there" and afhiri will let you know they hadn't even noticed it <3

Do the other companions have special comments or reactions upon recruiting your Tav?

scene.. afhiri is still obsessively looking for her flute. its almost like u didnt just recruit them

gale: "well they're certainly.. enthusiastic. we best keep an eye on them else we may lose them... hm." accepting he's about to become a babysitter

shadowheart: "are you sure it's wise to bring them along? they'll be more of a hinderance than a help." literally does not want afhiri here

astarion: "wonderful, you've recruited an actual clown! at least we'll have some on road entertainment." completely sarcastic btw... also doesn't want afhiri here

lae'zel: "chk, if nothing else they will be decent cannon fodder in the battles to come." ALSO doesn't want afhiri here.. fuck man

wyll: "what a delight afhiri is, it's good to have someone around who can find the joy in things despite our predicament." happie :)

karlach: also looking around for the flute now. been dragged into it

Does your Tav have any comments or advice when you recruit other companions?

@ gale: "oh my god he came out of a rock!!!!!!!" eyeing him up intensely.. "A CLOWN!!!!!!!!!!" proceeds to lose her shit

@ shadowheart: "she's quite pretty, isn't she? i like her toy! i wonder if she'll let me play with it too" ^_^

@ astarion: eyes him up and down "i think i've seen him before...." never mentions this again and if u ask them about it they're like huh??

@ lae'zel: doesn't really have anything to say.. "lae'zel looks pretty cool" with a big smile :D

@ wyll: "I'M SO GLAD YOU BEFRIENDED WYLL DID YOU SEE HIM AT THE GATE DID YOU SEE HIM STAB THAT GOBLIN WITH HIS QUIPPY ONE LINER HE'S SOO COOL HE WOULD MAKE SUCH A GOOD PERFORMER I WONDER IF HE'S EVER BEEN ON STAGE BEFORE!!!" bursting at the seams

@ karlach: "it would have been a crime to kill someone so hot..." nods sagely. misses the literal irony in her statement

What sort of general actions raise or lower their approval?

in general afhiri is super easy-going and befriends people who don't even like them.. ^_^ so losing approval will be harder but that doesn't mean raising is super easy! afhiri is just very nice to people in general!

raise:

helping tieflings

helping the poor, the downtrodden and lower class

being disrespectful to authority figures!

making jokes and doing silly things (includes lying)

performing! (you gain a lil bit of approval on performing even if you're bad)

lose:

siding with the goblins (this is the largest approval hit)

hurting + killing animals

not taking new opportunities (refusing to do quests, attacking enemies before letting them talk, etc)

being a stick in the mud with a pole up ur ass!! have some fun!!

scolding her for her antics or otherwise talking down to her

you can honestly view afhiri's approval as similiar to sera from dai if you're aware of her general likes and dislikes !!!

Are there any instances where your Tav can permanently leave the party, depending on player character actions?

no, but afhiri really won't like you killing the tieflings. they don't really give a shit about the druids but heavily empathises with the tieflings and this is the literal only time you can make afhiri genuinely angry at you. it's super easy to convince afhiri to calm down and stay however, and you can even gain the lost approval again depending on how you approach her at the party!!! (manipulation goes a long way <3)

Do they have any secrets that can be revealed?  What are the prerequisites for this secret coming to light?

afhiri doesn't necessarily have secrets, but you CAN learn that the afhiri you know is essentially a persona. it requires maximum approval and very specific dialogue choices - afhiri will reveal to you that they're running from themselves and they don't plan on stopping. if you try to encourage afhiri to accept who they are and stop running, you'll take a large approval hit and afhiri will cut the conversation short and you'll take small approval hits if you ever try to bring it up again ^_^

Do they have their own personal quest that spans the course of the game?  Can it take different branching paths depending on the choices the Player Character makes?

they do but not in a typical sense.

act 1: getting afhiri a flute, once you do this you'll unlock new bardic abilities for gameplay and combat! afhiri will also be seen playing the flute in camp ^_^ you can only pursue afhiri's romance once a flute has been gotten.. other instruments don't work !

act 2: you will get a sweet scene where afhiri tells you she's written a song about you and wants to perform !! afhiri will sing and dance and play their flute for you and the song will be from a selection of pre-made ones based on various decisions made in act 1! at the end of the performance you'll be given options that allow you to continue or end the romance ^_^

act 3: you've forced afhiri to return to where she's running from :) afhiri will, if your approval is high enough, mention her family. you Cannot visit, but if you encourage afhiri to pop in to see them they will Without you. if you ask afhiri how it went they'll be super dismissive and just say it was fine with a smile, afhiri won't say more even if you press the issue. it won't be satisfying and will likely get "i wish they did more with this" "did they cut visiting her family?" "that was pretty shit"

though there is some stuff that kind of counts if you keep reading ^_^

What do they say when the Player Character asks them to stay in camp?  How about when the Player Character asks them to come adventuring again?

stay: the biggest wet eyes and pout you have ever seen. you are going to make the clown cry. their bottom lip is wobbling. oh my god. if you confirm they are indeed staying they snap out of it immediately revealing it was a manipulation and just sulks like FINE

come: THIS PROVOKES PURE JOY!!!! afhiri is bouncing and resisting grabbing you (where their hands instinctively go to grab changes if ur romancing!) biggest smile ever. gonna play their absolute best for you u will NOT regret this!!!!!

Does your Tav have any escalating conflicts with one of the other companions, like Lae’zel and Shadowheart’s knife-fight?

no but afhiri will have escalating flirts :).....

Are there any unique NPCs associated with your Tav that can show up during the course of the game?

hehe.. yeah <3 candor

candor will appear and if you agree, will join as a camp companion! (ideally they'd both be companions but that isn't what this is ABOUT) you get a scene in each act where afhiri and candor interact with each other and you can chime in with your thoughts!!

act 1: they meet again for the first time since tadpole, afhiri jumps into candors arms and they have .. a moment. that feels invasive to watch. this is a scene that makes you think afhiri is Not available for romance ^_^ afhiri asks you to allow candor to come with you!

act 2: you accidentally walk in on them talking quietly by themselves. afhiri is resting her head on candors arm and it has its hand on her leg... another moment where you think afhiri isn't actually available.. extra drama if you're romancing afhiri !! this is the moment where you can ask about them, you learn about afhiri being poly, you're given the option to end the romance if you're not comfortable.

act 3: takes place after afhiri's act 3 quest, meaning you need that approval to see this! afhiri and candor are having a heart to heart about being back in the city and about afhiri's wild magic!! this is when candor confesses to afhiri that it's been protecting afhiri from wild magic for longer than originally thought. you can chime in, side with afhiri, who is upset specifically because she believes candor could have done more, befriended her sooner, helped her with her loneliness and troubled childhood, or side with candor, who believes it wasn't its place to interfere and only chose to eventually interfere because it felt it had to for afhiri's continued survival - it wasn't required sooner because afhiri wasn't in danger despite the hard life they were living. you also have the opportunity to not get involved, either by not taking a side and seeing BOTH their points, or by walking away.

in order to see afhiri's TRUE FULL QUEST!! u need to bring candor as a camp companion :) fuck everyone who refused candor to join. especially if they did it out of possessive jealousy of afhiri!!!!!!! PUNISHMENT!!!!!!! (yeah. gamers wouldn't like me)

Are there any moments in the game that trigger unique dialogue for your character? (Like Gale’s anecdote about the barfight after you save the goblin prisoner) 

the first time you perform ^_^ so it requires you to either be a bard, get the instrument proficiency feat, or just play a random instrument you find very badly! so it's pretty missable!

no matter what, even if you're bad, afhiri gets excited and wants to play with you!! you also gain approval ^_^

Story Specific

How does your Tav advise the player character when it comes to the Dream Visitor?

afhiri has no advice :) it was just a dream man idk. did you eat something funky

How do they advise the player character on Raphael?

raphael looks like a rich snob with too much money so afhiri DOES NOT LIKE. so afhiri will, not really getting what's going on, not want you to take the deal on the fact that he looks like a prick they should rob instead

How do they react to Astarion biting the Player Character?

afhiri, not knowing or understanding what a vampire is, "did you at least ask for consent"

How do they react to the Player Character letting Abdirak whip them?

head tilt of curiousity and naivity until there's blood and you're screaming and then they're looking around like what the fu

How do they react to the Player Character taking their first tadpole power?

afhiri will think it's kinda icky but won't comment beyond that!

Will they stay with the Player Character regardless of siding with the goblins or the tieflings, or is it possible for them to leave the party permanently?

they'll stay!

What can they be found doing at the tiefling/goblin party?

performing! afhiri will be playing her flute in her idle animation ^_^

Do they have comments on who the Player Character chooses to spend the night with? 

i'm gonna say no because i highly doubt afhiri fucking noticed or fucking cares. like if you approach afhiri and you're like HEY.... DID SMTH NASTY LAST NIGHT WITH WHATS ER FACE. yeah afhiri's interested now... but in general afhiri is not shoving nose where nose is not wanted. act 1 too early for afhiri to be a prying bitch

Do they have unique dialogue if the Player Character lets them die when they steal the Blood of Lathander?

probably smth really dumb like. "well that was bright!!!! anyway hi :D"

How do they react if the PC licks the dead spider in the Gauntlet of Shar?

"did it taste good? can i lick it?" you're both dead on the ground

What do they say if the PC tries to force them to go up on stage with Dribbles the Clown?

this is the best moment of afhiri's life. feels kinda nervous because oh my god, oh my god, it's DRIBBLES!!! this is their moment. their moment to prove themselves. FINALLY! FINALLY THEY CAN SHOW DRIBBLES THEY ARE THE BEST CLOWN!!!!! afhiri is PUMPED. this moment is EVERYTHING. this is the afhiri's nightsong moment, afhiri's ritual.. you get the point

Is it possible for your Tav to be kidnapped and replaced by Orin?  How is Orin's deception revealed?  How do they react to the PC rescuing them in the Temple of Bhaal?

afhiri cannot be kidnapped because afhiri would simply dodge orin. u cannot kidnap a circus weirdo. however i could have some insane thoughts about orin ATTEMPTING it and giving up with frustration :)

How do they react to the PC either allowing Astarion to ascend or convincing him to spare the 7000 spawn?

afhiri does not grasp what this means. afhiri cannot visualise 7000 souls as 7000 living breathing people - except they're not they're uh. dead. anyway. afhiri can't do it. so will afhiri react? no. very like "huh?" and no one will take the time to explain . gale might explain later at camp. then its "huh..." and u got nothing else cuz THEY CANNOT VISUALISE IT ......

How does Tav react to the PC becoming a mind flayer?  Can they offer to become one themselves?  Does their reaction change if they’re romanced? 

afhiri would give a very chill oh that's cool!! that's pretty sick!!! ohhhhhh !!!! awesome !!!!!! type of reaction. would not offer however because afhiri don't understand what the fuck goin on thinks ur doing it just for funsies. cuz u wanna. ^_^ romance would get no other reaction beyond maybe a line about being curious how u kiss each other now and also what those tentacles do

How do they react when the Dark Urge first reveals their amnesia and murderous thoughts to them?

afhiri don't rly know what amnesia is. once u explain its very oh..... okay..... F. reaction. emotionally stunted and unavoidable gamer reaction. murderous thoughts? very haha and then what. afhiri doesn't take this Seriously.

How do they react to the Dark Urge killing Alfira?

see this will make afhiri very sad because ALFIRA BARD FRIEND. WEARING A FUNNY JESTER OUTFIT. ALFIRA :HANDSHAKE: AFHIRI!!!!!! so afhiri would be sad to find out alfira is dead but likely would not believe the durge did it because durge is friend :)

If romanced, how do they react to the Dark Urge trying to kill them in Act 2?

i basically just answered this huh. haha and then what :) its so funny how i keep saying afhiri don't take shit srsly. like afhiri would not believe ur actually gonna try and kill them. they're just vibing and think ur being a bit kinky

Romance

Is your Tav a romanceable character?  Are there any specific requirements to romancing them?

afhiri is romanceable and without the flute from her act 1 quest the romance is locked out entirely. if you enter act 2 without giving the flute, romance is locked for good!

Does your Tav need to be flirted with to start the romance, or will they approach the PC themselves if approval is high enough?

afhiri needs to be flirted with at least once for her to see you in that light. if you don't keep flirting, afhiri will approach you!

Are they a polyamorous or a monogamous option?

poly!!! if you ask afhiri to be mono it will ONLY work if you didn't recruit candor or you sought to drive a wedge between them, so they never reached a romantic point, however they will STILL be very close and intimate, otherwise afhiri will say no because candor is too important to them.

afhiri will accept poly with every single companion no questions asked ^_^

Do they have a special romance scene at the tiefling/goblin party?

afhiri does!! you approach them and they're all exhausted and tired but immensely happy and in their element because they've been playing and performing the entire party, and you talking to them is giving them a short break. if you ask, afhiri will come to you after the party when they've finished performing and everyone's going to bed!

the scene will be you and afhiri by the water. u sit down and afhiri gives u a private session thats a much more delicate and gentle song just for u . she doesnt sing its just a tune. (note: if u romance her in act 2 she will play this same tune but this time will start singing a song she wrote for u) u then talk a lil bit about the party and everything uve been thru so far. afhiri is pretty useless during it but its used as a way to show the player how disconnected afhiri is. afhiri acts as escapism for the player from the story!

Does the romance have different branching paths, or just one route to take?

it'll have just one path, but micro changes (like small dialogues) based on candor things!

How do they react to the player character breaking up with them, or choosing another character over them?

hmm.. afhiri would ultimately be very chill about it. theyd be sad about the fact you cant hold hands and cuddle at night and kiss and stuff anymore. and theyd ask if you CAN still do that stuff but as friends (offering a fwb alternative!!!!) if you say no theyll be fine but a tiny bit moopy because they had fun with you and liked being close to u. but ur not gonna get no grand statements or tears from afhiri! and would be happy for you if u found love with someone else c:

What questions can Zethino ask the PC about Tav in the Love Test? 

question one: what kind of performer has afhiri always dreamt of being?

available answers: a bard, a clown, something unique and different

something unique and different is the correct answer! no approval changes.

question two: afhiri has left their life behind on nothing but a whim, what is afhiri running from?

available answers: responsibility, their family, dribbles

dribbles is the correct answer and gains approval! if you select responsibility or their family it will also be considered correct but will gain disapproval.

question three: what does afhiri need the most?

available answers: to grow up and act like an adult, freedom, to become the best clown in the world

to become the best clown in the world and freedom are both correct. no approval changes!

If they’re poly, do they have a reaction to the PC engaging in a relationship with Halsin?

down for it. down to be a polycule. down to also date halsin. down for threesomes. down for it all!!!!!!!! afhiri a free spirit baby.

How do they react if the PC has sex with Mizora? The Emperor?  Haarlep?

GET IT!!!!! GET IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! afhiri doesn't really have any concept of like. sleeping with a devil or an incubus is like, realistically a bad idea, so its just. DAMN YOU FUCKED THAT HOT PERSON?? NIIIICEEEE!!!! high fives!!!!! with the emperor its just the same thing. you got laid? fuck yeah. high fives!

Will they join in with the PC and the Drow Twins, or no?

ABSOLUTELY!!!!!!!!!!!!! AFHIRI IS DOWN!!!!!!!!!! u have got the most giddy tiefling right behind you, going 'eeeeee' with excitement, bouncing up and down looking at you with large pleady eyes CAN WE PLEASE? CAN WE PLEEASSE??? I REALLY WANT TO!!!!!!! if tav says no you bet ur ass afhiri is hanging around there like hehe can i anyway

What are Tav’s plans for the future?  Do they propose to the PC, or is marriage not something they’re interested in?

afhiri is an independent soul .. doesn't wanna get married ... doesnt rlly wanna move in either.. being with afhiri longterm is accepting uve got a partner whos adventurous and wants to explore and see the world and meet new people!!! now afhiri WILL settle down after years together because afhiri will lowkey become commited with you without labels - if YOU involve labels thats just gonna push afhiri away. so just be patient with her.. like a stray cat who sleeps in ur house and eats ur food. one day they'll just stay if you're patient with them!!!!!! also being with afhiri is accepting her free spirited nature... afhiri is gonna date and sleep with other people, AND YOURE ALLOWED TOO!!, so afhiri long term is not for anyone who wants the domestic monogamous life

[lightspringrain]

Tears in the Sea

Summary: What if Tech didn't make it out of Hemlock's lab. What would his funeral on Pabu look like?

Notes: The story and images where created by me (LightSpringRain) and can also be found on A03. This story was edited by @eclec-tech.

The cloudless skies betrayed. There was a stillness in the air. A somber tone. There was no one in the streets of Pabu. There was no one on their boats, no one at the beach. There was no one in the pilot seat of the Marauder. There was only an emptiness and the pain of an open wound that filled the air. For today was not a day of joy but of a day of reflection. A day to say one’s final goodbyes. A day to let go of all the grief and begin to learn how to love again.

Tech knew all the calculations and risks probably before any of The Bad Batch set foot on Eriadu. He knew the probabilities of surviving the fall the second he looked down and deeply sighed. He knew even if he were to survive, he would be in enemy territory, gravely wounded and alone. However, none of that mattered. He knew what he had to do in order to save his family.

His plan worked. His family survived but only to be broken up again by a betrayal, long coming. His probabilities and calculations were right. He did survive but only to be captured by Dr. Hemlock. Tech’s body was broken. Too broken to fix even by the doctor. It was the machines that gave him life. A life of pain and torture. A life forced to do unspeakable things and aid in diabolical plans. However, Tech did believe there was a reason he was alive. That reason came when he saw his brothers again.

Although he was tethered to Hemlock’s lab, he was able to aid his brothers. To his delight and fear, everyone he loved was on Mt. Tantiss. Even Phee, who had not given up on the possibility that he was alive. Tech aided his family while still in the lab as they freed the clones and rescued Omega and Crosshair. When they came to get Tech, he had to inform them that he could not go with them...not in the way they wanted him to leave. He was living on borrowed time.

It was Hunter’s worst nightmare. He was so close to having his family together again, but sacrifices had to be made. It was always Tech that made them, but he never second guessed his decisions. It was Tech that asked them to unplug him from Hemlock’s machines. He insisted it would be mercy for him. Mercy to let him have a moment in time where he was certain of peace.

Although their relationship was new and had its growing pains, it felt like the start of a true spark. Tech wanted to navigate it with Phee and see where it would go, but time was cruel. He only had a minute to say his final goodbyes, but he was glad he got to see her again. Glad he got to tell Phee his hopes and realized they shared the same dream. He was glad he got to see his family one last time, knowing they would be safe soon. His purpose as a soldier was done.

It was Crosshair who unplugged Tech - a death that would forever haunt him. Crosshair had heard how Tech stood up to rescue him when all others doubted him. At first he was angry at Tech, for he did not believe he was worth saving. However, now with the consequences in front of him, it would be cruel to deny the meaning of Tech’s sacrifice. Crosshair had to accept his worth to his family after all.

Circumstance gave The Bad Batch the opportunity to bury their brother this time. His body would not be lost in the battlefield, or be kept in a lab to be used as some sort of science experiment. Months after their escape from Tantiss the day came when all preparations were ready. The day felt so heavy even under the cloudless skies. It was time to lay Tech to rest.

His body was no longer being preserved in bacta. Out on the main pier sat his coffin on a stage. It was white like his armor, with a streak of orange running down the middle. There was a little window where one could look at his face. He looked at peace, like he was having a nice dream. Omega wasn’t sure how she felt about this. She wasn’t sure if it made her feel better or worse.

It was morning and people shuffled as they laid out the tables and chairs all along the beach. Normally Omega was one to help, but instead she was near the shore sticking a stick into the wet sand. She glanced over to the pier where Tech layed and got a sinking feeling in her stomach. It wasn’t as strong as it was before, but it still made her look away quickly.

“Sooo. This is where you've been all morning?” Omega continued to stare at the ground despite Phee’s voice.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she grumbled as she threw the stick into the water. Omega clutched her knees as the sinking feeling returned. 

“I didn’t expect you to,” Phee said softly. She stood next to Omega for a moment and looked out to the sea then to Tech’s coffin. She deeply sighed and asked, “Mind if I join you?”

Omega gently wordlessly nodded, still refusing to look at Phee. The two sat there for a moment, not speaking at all - Omega lost in thought and Phee continuously staring out to the sea.    

“Phee, have you lost someone before?” Omega finally broke the silence. Phee knew Omega would come around with some space. 

“Certainly, people who were close to me and some who were not.” Omega finally was able to look at Phee with this comment. She searched Phee’s eyes for an answer to an unspoken question.  

“Is there any way to…understand grief?” 

“People might think there are paths on how grief travels but there are no maps to these things. We all grieve differently and grief can take many forms.” Omega again returned to looking at the ground and Phee to the sea. “Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.” 

“Am I a bad person because it doesn’t hurt so much anymore?” Omega asked in a broken voice. Phee took a second to respond. She again looked at Tech’s coffin and looked back to Omega. 

“When we love someone, we put a piece of our souls into theirs and vice versa. When they are ripped away, that piece is also ripped and it creates a deep wound. That wound changes things. It may take a long time to heal, but when it does that person stays with us in a new way. It doesn’t make you a bad person. It just means you are ready to love him freely again.”

Omega broke her lock on Phee’s eyes as she tried to process what Phee had said. Slowly she realized something.  

“I once was sad to be even in the Marauder. It feels different now that Tech is not piloting it, but now it makes me smile to remember all our flying lessons … us practicing the Tech-Turn.” There was a faint smile as Omega recalled the memories. There were still tears building in the corner of her eyes but she felt less guilty about the joy returning to her heart. 

“That is the spirit!” Phee put her hand on Omega’s shoulder. Omega smiled at her. “You are able to appreciate the legacy he left behind. We may have lost him, but that doesn’t mean we aren’t able to love him. It may hurt, but to have lost meant you had to have loved. Grief is love expressed through sadness. To heal from grief is to love freely again.” 

“So…I am not a bad person. I am trying to figure out how to love him again.” There was a relief in Omega’s voice as she came to this realization.  

“Remember all the time he spent with us. Let those memories make you smile again,” Phee said while clutching her chest and looking at Tech’s coffin. 

“Isn’t that right, Brown eyes?” she whispered so low that even she could barely hear it.   

The sun was reaching noon. There was a gentle breeze, and a light buzz. Some of the residents gathered at tables set along the beach. The Bad Batch and Phee were at a table directly in front of the coffin. It was a tradition to have one last meal before sending a loved one off. It was supposed to be as if the deceased was with them at the table. Only positive memories are supposed to be shared. It was painful and slow at first. Omega finally broke the awkwardness with the memory of Tech winning the Riot Race. Soon The Batch were drinking and laughing. They remembered things back when they were cadets, they remembered things when they first adopted Omega and they remembered things from Tech’s last few days. Tech always had a sassiness that never left him. When it was all said and done, they raised their glasses up high and cheered, “To Tech!” 

The coffin was moved onto a small wooden boat. One by one, the Batch came up and spoke a couple of words and left something behind in the boat. Hunter left one of his headbands. Omega, her trooper doll.  Wrecker, some of his favorite fruits. Echo, some of his tools. Crosshair, his reflectors and Phee her golden hair bands. They gathered around the boat and pushed it off. 

They watched as its sails caught the wind and took it out to sea. They all wore white except for a black sash around their waists. When the boat reached the horizon, they each took off their black sash and let the wind take it away. They were all ripped away and blown over the water. Like tears in the sea, they all dissolved into the water, carrying all their grief and sadness with it. Leaving only a clean white slate behind. 

Over the horizon the boat began to sink. There were reefs below, a whole ecosystem full of life. Slowly the boat pulled itself apart with the weight of the water. The coffin gently sank, landing on the reef where over time it would become a part of it. There Tech layed, in an eternal peaceful slumber. Forever surrounded by life and the sun-filled waters of Pabu. He was born on the sea and he had returned to it.