#were like. A meaningful desc

[ranvwoop]

not my irl saying they wanted to have a political debate with me irl when i said that they did not know what the personality disorder they said they selfdxed w from tiktok actually entailed and now people with it are just making it up after I've been researching it for like 4 years. hello

[reclinepilled]

needy, e.w.

cw: fluff!!! little angst, pet names (baby, beautiful, sweetheart, princess, gorgeous) like one curse word, reader yells at ellie, reader cries a teeny tiny bit, no masc/fem roles are established

desc: gamer!ellie is glued to her game while your patience runs short. also soft!ellie🙏.

a/n: happy march 1st guys! i wanted to share something i wrote while procrastinating some work. thanks for all the support on my last two posts. also the anon that sent in the request, im working on it <3 thank you for reading and reblogs are welcomed and greatly appreciateddd !

wc: 801 (i think)

PLEASE READ HERE ON INFORMATION ABOUT AND HOW TO HELP PALESTINE!!!

you try not to be so needy, you really do. however, your heart can't help but get a little heavy watching ellie completely ignore your presence on one of your days off. and she's not even ignoring you to study or work, it's to play her stupid games.

sure, you played your fair share of video games, as you had an undying love for that one genre. however, you didn't come over under the impression that you'd be getting lonely in her bed, angry, while occasionally letting out a frustrated sigh. she didn't pay attention to those, too busy yelling at her friends on whatever fps shooter she was glued to.

you got angrier and angrier thinking about it and listening to her mash the buttons on her keyboard and throw insults out into her mic. you swear you can feel the annoyance in your bloodstream. you just wanted to do skincare and facemasks, watch some movies, and maybe even bake with your girlfriend. you decide to put your anger aside and give her the benefit of the doubt. you get up from her bed to remind her of what you two had planned. maybe she forgot?

"ellie, baby?" you say as you grab her shoulder softly to get her attention. she glances up at you then moves her headset off one of her ears, "yea- jesse, what the hell! he was literally one hp!" she yells. "anyways, sorry, what's up?" ellie finally gives you two scoops of her attention. "el, i thought we were gonna spend time together..," you say, shifting your weight to one leg as you cross your arms. "yea, yea, of course. just give me five more minutes," ellie says as she turns back to her game. "you literally said that 30 minutes ago, el," you sigh. "i mean it this time," ellie turns to you, doing a puppy face jokingly.

any other time you would burst into a fit of laughter, however right now, you were genuinely pissed off. you stare at her for a few seconds in silence, she stares back. her face slowly drops as she realizes you're pretty upset. next thing you know, you've reached over and put her pc into sleep mode. "y/n! why!??" she whines like a teenage boy going through puberty. "because, i came over on my day off to spend time with you, i could be getting a manicure or something.. but i've spent nearly an hour and a half watching you play this shitty game!" you yell then you walk out of her room, fed up. you grab your bag next to the couch and start to put your belongings away.

"sweetheart! i'm sorry, i really am!" she says as she follows you out of the room. you ignore her, now putting your bag on your shoulder. "look," ellie comes in front of you and softly slides the bag off of your shoulder, she notices how you're still looking down. she gently grabs your shoulders while looking down at you with an apologetic look on her face, "i am so sorry, i just got caught up in the game. i enjoy you being here, and i find your presence so comforting, beautiful. i never meant to make you feel unappreciated, i'm sorry once again." she takes her hand and lifts your face up, and notices your tear stained cheeks.

ellie's heart quite honestly shattered into a million pieces, she didn't know she made you feel so bad but she understands now. "baby, we can do whatever you want," she pulls you into a meaningful embrace while rubbing your back. "els, i love you, sorry for yelling and overreacting-" she cuts you off, "no don't apologize, it was pretty justified, i was being dumb," she lets out an airy laugh, "i love you back, princess."

she could feel you smile against her chest and it felt like 10 tons were lifted off of her back. she pulls away to place a soft kiss on your forehead, then your nose, one on your cheek, and long one on your lips.

you straddle her on her bed while softly chuckling at the cute fuzzy animal headband you placed on ellie's head. you roll the jade roller all over her face, working in the serum you applied before. you can't help but admire how pretty she is. her constellations of freckles, each one so unique, her breathtaking deep eyes, and her long lashes you were so jealous of. little did you know, she was doing the same. you looked like a goddess from this angle, the light cascading down on your perfect figure emphasizing it. "hey baby?" ellie grabs your wrist. "yea, gorgeous?" you slightly lean back from her face, raising a brow.

"it's really hot when you yell at me."

reclinepilled

please do not plagiarize any of my works or post them on other websites without given permission !

[hyunsusgf]

those eyes.

part 2

synopsis … cha hyun-su was a close friend of yours despite the outbreak you seemed to find yourself in. but he isn’t really just your friend.

pairing … cha hyun-su x gn!reader ༝༚༝༚ featuring bsf!eun-yu

warnings … none really, maybe a lil ooc

lovely notes … first fic omg. this will def have a part two bcs why not? also, listen to those eyes by new west while reading.

꩜ [ 1.1k words ]

“did you see his eyes when he was talking about you?”

“what the hell are you talking about, eun-yu?” you questioned the girl who just so happened to be your only close friend in the mess you found yourself in.

save for hyun-su, of course. the hyun-su who killed monsters for you every time you encountered one without fail. the hyun-su who always went to retrieve items for you whenever you asked. the hyun-su, who was the only person you could have deep, meaningful conversations with. your hyun-su.

“you have the same look in your eyes when you talk about him; you know that, right?” eun-yu interrupted your train of thought.

“and what look are we exactly talking about?” you responded, knowing you had an incredulous look on your face.

hyun-su was simply your friend. simply your friend that you enjoyed talking to and spending time with. nothing more, nothing less.

“it’s like your eyes are so full of,” she paused for a beat. “romance. it’s disgusting. when are the both of you going to own up to your feelings and confess?”

“now you're delusional if you think hyun-su and i are anything other than friends. whatever “romance” you think you see is most definitely your eyes playing tricks on you.” you were quick to respond, not wanting your friend to get any unbelievable ideas about your friendship with hyun-su.

it’s not that you didn't want to think you didn't like hyun-su; you just didn't like him like that. like a crush, or a lover, or a boyfriend, or whatever the hell eun-yu was thinking. you couldn't like him like that.

you didn't like him like that when he killed monsters for you, whenever he got something for you, or whenever you two had conversations you couldn't have with anyone else.

you couldn't like him like that. especially not when neither of you was guaranteed to live another day with the monsters roaming around your apartment.

“right. anyways, talk to me when you finally confess your undying love to him. we all know he won't be the one doing the confessing.” was the last thing she said before sending a teasing wink your way and going off to do whatever it is she does.

though, her words left you thinking, did hyun-su have a romantic look in his eyes when he talked about you? more importantly, did you have the same look in your eyes?

but, those were questions for another time. questions for when you finally figure out the feelings you had for your "friend." if there were any feelings there at all.

the next time you saw hyun-su was when he and eun-yu were talking in the dimly lit stairwell.

you walked up to the both of them on the stairs, curious to see what they were talking about this time (and totally not being in their business).

“speak of the devil.” eun-yu mumbled, although playful, as you approached the two.

you raised an eyebrow at her words but greeted her and hyun-su nonetheless.

“hello to you too, i guess. and hi hyun-su. it’s nice to see you.”

“hi. it’s nice to see you too.” he responded, being his usual awkward self.

eun-yu shared a brief look with you before looking at hyun-su, then getting up.

“i guess i’ll leave you two.” she grinned at you before she walked off to whatever corridor of the apartments.

she was trying to set you up with hyun-su. especially with the prior conversation you two had, she was trying to get you to “confess your undying love to him.” her words, not yours.

but now was not the time to dwell on your past conversation, now was the time to talk to your "friend,” hyun-su.

talking to him always felt weird. not weird, as in, he was weird, but weird in a way you couldn’t describe it. you frankly didn't understand it. your past conversation with eun-yu had you pondering your feelings for hyun-su, and whether it was really as romantic as eun-yu claimed it to be.

“are you okay?” hyun-su’s question interrupted your train of thought, which happened quite regularly.

“yea, i’m fine. how are you?” you responded casually.

“i think i’m fine. as fine as i can be after having to be locked up for however long.” he laughed, trying to make light of the situation.

you giggled in response, glad to see how he could be so positive despite being treated like actual shit by everyone around him.

“i’m sorry, though. that you had to be treated like that.”

“it’s nothing that can be done about it. besides, it’s in the past now.” he responded, uncharacteristically calm about his entire predicament.

“are you sure, hyun-su? we treated you like really terrible.”

“i’m telling you it’s fine. i’m with you now anyway,” he muttered the last part as if he didn’t want you to hear it.

it didn’t matter anyway. he meant it in a friendly, “i’m glad you could be there for me as someone i can talk to” way, right?

after he said that, there was a moment of silence. not the awkward, tense-filled silence. but the type of comfortable silence where you could sit and not feel like you had to talk to fill in the silent gaps.

“but, you know, i’m always here for you, right?” hyun-su asked quite seriously.

“i know. always.” you responded without hesitation.

the third time you saw hyun-su was when he saved you from getting your ass handed to you by a monster. he came in the moment before your life ended.

you were grateful for him saving you, but you hated the fact that he constantly put his life on the line to save people, even if they wouldn’t do the same for him. not to say that you wouldn't do the same for him, but you knew some people just wouldn't.

“hyun-su, what the fuck was that?”

“what?” he responded to your question, obviously caught off guard by your aggressive demeanor.

“you could have, i don’t know, maybe died just now?”

“i’m sorry. i was just trying to keep you safe.” he responded.

you felt bad for blowing up at him, but you couldn’t help it after seeing how he put his own life on the line for you. you knew he couldn’t technically die. but you still didn’t know what you would do with yourself if he lost his life trying to save yours.

“i’m sorry, i just got worried. i don’t want you dying for me.” you said with a sigh.

“i wouldn’t mind dying for you; you know that, right?”

his words caught you off guard, especially with the nonchalance he said them with. like he would actually die for you without any hesitation.

“are you crazy, hyun-su?”

“even worse.”

“what’s worse?”

“in love.”

[ryiju-muunie]

[I] Know it's for the better

Usopp/transfem!Sanji Vinsmoke & Luffy D. Monkey/Zoro Roronoa Warnings: college/university AU, POV Usopp, Nami-Usopp friendship, mutual pining, friends to lovers, fluff and humor, tooth-rotting fluff, light angst, misunderstanding, cuddling, slow dancing, applying lipstick, cheesy romance, ambiguously early 2000s Word count: 18816 DESC: Ever since high school, Sanji and Usopp were the best of friends. Two social outcasts with nothing better to do than talk to each other. But now, he hadn’t thought about his old friend in almost three years, opting to live his life in the present rather than focus on the past. Who needed that jerk who ghosted him anyways? Not him! He was happier now! That was until he got a message on Facebook. //// Usopp mistakens his very intense feelings as misogyny.

Two uploads in one night whaaat

NOTES: I want to thank @pyr0frnzy for helping me with some plot ideas as the god of Sanuso and putting up with my constant DMing for how I could improve scenes! None of this would've been possible if you and I didn't bounce back and forth between different ideas! I've had this idea in my head for so long and it turned into something more meaningful than I could've ever expected. It's so much more heartfelt about love than it was originally going to be. More Rom than Com. And yes, Sanji might be OOC, you'll have to tell me. I'm not too good at writing him as a character, but I really wanted to give it a try in this kind of au. So let me know [politely I will cry] if I can improve! Thank you to Sailor Song by Gigi Perez for being the only thing I listened to, to write the latter half of this story. Especially since my mom texted me to change it because it's been days.

-

They were inseparable. Ever since high school, Sanji and Usopp were the best of friends. Maybe it was because they were opposites who attracted one another, or maybe it was because they were both a bit socially awkward. Two social outcasts with nothing better to do than talk to each other. To anyone else it could have seemed sad or pathetic but having each other was enough. Someone to lean on who understood you. So, when Sanji had decided to leave the country for college, it was devastating. He had told his friend of his plans to become a culinary chef and make a name for himself. He had said how he’d never leave, but instead improve his own community with his food. So, it was a surprise to the brunette when he found out that his best friend would leave, especially to a place with such … little technology.  

Of course, he had assumed it had to be him. Did he stink? Did he smell so bad his friend had to leave across the globe? Oh, maybe he did something so embarrassingly stupid he blacked out! And now the blonde was leaving him because of it! Of course, Usopp knew that it couldn’t be that [he never blacked out]. So, it had to be something else he did. Was he too touchy? Or too honest? He knew that all those late-night talks about their feelings would eventually bite him in the ass! 

Whatever the case was, he bit back his protests in favor of his best friend. When they said goodbye, that was that for three years. Three years had passed, and the brunette had grown. It was apparent from his constant habit to Facebook his whole life, or the fact he started working out as a nervous habit. The once scrawny guy who used to be too scared to even stand up for himself was now … well, still scared to stand up for himself- but he was more built now!  

Sanji wasn’t on his mind anymore. The first few months he tried to Facebook messenger his friend, but the messages would never go through. That, or he was being ghosted. Either way, he had to give up at some point, right, and move on! So maybe that’s why he started working out. Every time his mind would wander to his almost infatuation with his friend, he picked up a weight and crunched until he couldn’t think anymore. Was infatuation the right word? More like, constant-need-to-be-around-him-and-touch-him-and-breathe-in-his-scent-itous! And that was totally normal. Best friends always touched each other, like hand holding or cuddling if it got too cold at a sleepover. He couldn’t help but miss that, yet when he started to yearn- he went to do a few pull ups.  

Now Usopp was 22, almost 23, and taller than before. Maybe he grew muscles in his feet too! He’d have to Google that. He hadn’t thought about his old friend in almost three years, opting to live his life in the present rather than focus on the past. Who needed that jerk who ghosted him? Not him! He was happier now! College was about to start up again, his senior year. He had a future career planned in engineering and the student wasn’t about to let some old memories rupture his plans.  

That was until he got a message on Facebook as he was watching TV on his couch. He wasn’t too good with phones, preferring a laptop instead. But this I-Black-Moto-Whatever would work for now. The man pressed a few buttons on the keyboard and used that strange mouse thing to click into his Facebook app. He hadn’t used that app in, honestly, a few hours. Getting a message this late before school wasn’t uncommon, but it wasn’t typical. Clearly someone needed something from him, probably Zoro. Knowing him, the idiot got lost on his way back to the apartment.  

But instead, it was a blank profile he hadn’t seen active in three years, with one message queued: ‘Usopp, can we talk?’ 

His eyes widened at the sight, letting out a breath. What. Was. He. Supposed. To. Do!? Usopp hadn’t prepared for Sanji messaging him out of the blue! He wasn’t even prepared for his upcoming midterms and his semester hadn’t even started!! Instead of acting, however, he opted to set his phone down. As if it was on fire, he dropped it and covered a pillow over it, then pressed his hand to the center.  

Demon phone, being possessed by such negative energy…  

Then he heard it buzz again from under the cushion. That made the student jump and stare down at the cushion. Two messages in the span of about forty-five seconds was a record. Especially for Sanji. It had to have been important, or at the very least something. I mean, radio silence for three years then two messages back-to-back? If anything, he was kind of lucky. The blonde could have just not ever messaged him again, leaving him to wonder what if for eternity. But he did get a message. Two in fact. It would be rude at that point not to respond with something, or at least not read the other one.  

Slowly, the man pushed the pillow from his phone, letting it fall to the ground. Then he picked up the demon phone and turned it, looking at the screen. Another message had queued on the app, from the same person: ‘It’s Sanji. From High School.’ Before he could dare respond, however [or process what the hell was happening], his phone lit up. Someone was calling him. Was it him? Was it the person he swore he’d never see again if he could help it? Was it the person, though, that he deep down secretly hoped would run into him at the supermarket, so he could beg for him to be back in his life?  

Usopp wasn’t even prepared!! The man never knew what he was going to do if Sanji wanted to come back into his life. Frankly, he assumed this would never happen. He just thought they were done with. Forever. So, the fact this was happening, days before his senior year at college, was very very stressful.  

Without looking at the number or caller ID, to verify if it was the contact he never erased from his phone, he clicked the button and brought it to his ear, “...Sanji?” The brunette’s voice was timid, a soft whisper. Never did he think he was ever going to hear the other man's voice again. Or even think that they’d get to see each other. It was almost surreal, a kind of moment he wanted to photograph and save in his memories forever. It could be the beginning of something more, another chance at their friendship. Or it would tie up the loose ends of their old one, leaving them both satisfied with answers.  

“Who the hell is Sanji?”  

But no, it was Zoro.  

Usopp kind of deflated at the sound of the gruff voice on the other line, contrasting the soft voice he had grown to miss. Sanji’s voice was nice and fluttery, although he knew he could raise it to be rough if he needed too. His roommate was definitely gruff, or less emotional than he was used to. The other man was more in touch with his emotions [anxiety], whereas the moss-headed one didn’t feel nearly as many emotions [anxiety] as his roommate. 

He swallowed, “Uh TV character, whaddya want?” The man placed his phone between his shoulder and his head, adjusting his position on the couch to look at the screen ahead of him. It was some YouTube video he had found, nothing he was really interested in. YouTube was just a glorified ad filled Netflix with weird homemade videos. He’d rather watch anything else than the gardening video he ended up clicking on.  

“I got us Chinese food,” Zoro replied into the phone, shuffling a bit into the microphone before he continued, “And I ran into that chick you liked last year. She’s ugly.” From the way his voice muffled a bit, before becoming clear, his roommate could tell he was probably eating some of their dinner. Great.  

“She isn’t ugly!” Usopp retorted, looking away from the TV to find the remote to shut it off. Maybe some Criminal Minds would suffice… 

His thoughts were interrupted by a loud exhale, “You have the weirdest type in women.’

“She isn’t ugly,” he narrowed his eyes, taking a hold of the remote and clicking the television off YouTube. What a self-centered sword obsessed prick. Zoro was more focused on Luffy’s [their other roommate] muscles than actual women. He just didn’t have taste! To Usopp, all women were pretty! Even that one girl who tried to get some of his blood to sell on the dark web… To be fair he had a crush on her before he realized she was weird like that. 

“She so is,” he bit into another piece of food audibly, “I have Luffy, too.” Zoro passed the phone to the spikey haired maniac as the brunette sighed out an ‘of course you do’. 

“Heyyyy Sopp!” Luffy yelled into the phone, making his roommate pick his own device up and turn it on speaker phone, to hold it away from his ear, “We got Indian!”  

“I thought Zoro said Chinese?” He asked, a bit unsure. When it came to Zoro, though, he was used to hearing the wrong thing. Maybe he was dyslexic or had one too many boxing incidents, but he had no sense of … anything. Direction, spelling, breathing, direction, walking, anything!! He was unsure as to how the moss was able to survive that long without him in order to watch over him.  

“No, I said Indian,” Roronoa spoke into the phone, before it was pulled back to Luffy who giggled, “We got Indian.”  

As Usopp went to reply he heard another faint voice in the background, who he instantly recognized. He let out a gasp and brought the phone to his face, nose pressing against the small screen, “Put Nami on.” Nami wasn’t exactly their roommate, but she was welcome to live with them if she so chose to. She was one of his closest friends, someone who remembered their high school days with Sanji. She’d understand his anxieties and most of all she’d talk some sense into him. Knowing her, she’d tell him to respond politely instead of hiding away forever. Even though he really wanted to hide forever.  

“Usopp?” Her voice cut clearly through the microphone of his cellphone.  

“Go off speaker, I have important business to discuss,” he wasn’t wrong per se, but he didn’t want to outright say it knowing that Luffy and Zoro could hear. They’d probably laugh at him for freaking out so much! It wasn’t his fault this was basically the end of the world for him!  

The man’s friend let out a sigh and he heard a bit of shuffling before she responded, “What’s wrong now?” Of course, she knew something was wrong! It was Nami! Nami knew everything! He knew he could always count on her for advice and more so to calm his nerves. 

“Well,” Usopp hesitated a bit, his voice pitching another octave before he continued, “Sanji Facebooked me.” 

“Sanji Facebooked you?!” She repeated before the student shushed her loudly.  

“No-no! Don’t say it out loud!” He hit the phone against his head. Then he spoke in a more quiet, shaky voice, “I don’t know what to do.” 

It was silent for a moment, but he could tell she was giving him her signature look, “You’re pathetic.”  

“Hey!” He interjected as she then asked, “What did his Facebook say?” 

Oh … what did it say? Usopp had been so caught up in all the drama of it he kind of forgot what the message said. He pressed his lips together and made a small popping sound, “Um… It’s Sanji from high school…?” That was right, right? Probably.  

“And you answered right?” Nami prodded. By this point he knew his roommates were probably listening, or worse had her put him back on speaker. Cat was out of the bag, and the cat had Facebook, apparently.  

“...Was I supposed to...?” He squeaked. What did it matter if he saw the message and didn’t answer yet? It wasn’t like Sanji could see the fact he had read it without answering.  

“Did you click into the message?” Her voice was beginning to sound annoyed, as if she already knew the answer to what she just asked.  

“Yeahh,” he looked away as his phone jolted in his hand from a loud, “YOU IDIOT!” From Nami. Usopp jumped and his cellphone fumbled a bit in his hand before it landed on the floor before him, shaking as she yelled, “Facebook has read receipts now!” Read receipts? He narrowed his eyes at the phone and peered over the couch as it rumbled around.  

Then it went silent as the phone had been clearly taken from her and Zoro’s voice played through the speaker, “Your Sanji can see you saw his message without responding.” Oh! Oh. He knew? He knew Usopp read the message and seemingly ignored it? Oh god! Oh no! He didn’t mean to ignore his old best friend, more so, he was trying to figure out what to do. I mean, if he had it his way, he would ignore it. Not in a mean way, more in a cowardly way. But knowing Nami, she’d never let him live if he didn’t at least respond. Maybe she was in it more for the drama or she was trying to get him to be a better person than she clearly was.  

The brunette climbed down from the couch onto the floor, kneeling over the phone as he let out a breath, “How far are you guys?” Maybe he could wait for them to get back so he could respond with all their help, instead of being left to navigate it on his own.  

“Thirty minutes!” Luffy shouted from the far side of the phone, “We went to the Indian place across town!” Okay, so he could wait thirty minutes.  

Sanji would just have to be patient; he was patient right? But knowing Sanji he was probably concerned. He knew his old friend well enough to know that if he had read a message without responding it meant something was up, even if he didn’t intend it. That blonde always worried for him, even if he didn’t need it. That’s why they were such good friends. Usopp had someone he could lean on who had just enough emotional un-regulation to understand him and his own anxieties.  

He knew Luffy and Zoro were good friends, and they meant well, but none of them were in tune with their emotions. Nami too, she was nice but she wasn’t the emotional type. He needed someone he could cry to, and someone who would know him well enough to know exactly what to do. In some way, the man wanted to come crawling back to his old friend and pretend no time had passed. Pretend everything was okay so he could be held with comfort and fed those rice balls, those delicious rice balls. 

Usopp went to speak but his ginger friend read his mind, “You’re not waiting. Respond to him then call us back.” And the phone clicked, turning the screen off from the phone call to show his Facebook messages. Sanji’s chat was open, and ten minutes had already passed. He seemed to still be online, his profile picture just being a faceless photo of some scenery. His old friend's profile was the same, and it had been for three years. There was one post he made when he started high school of some flowers, with the caption, ‘Just planted these. Hoping they’ll grow by the time HS ends’. That was his only post. Nothing with his face now or his new place.  

He wondered, did Sanji look the same? Did the blonde grow his hair out or keep it short? Did he change his part and finally brush those strands away to show both of his eyes? Or maybe he finally shaved that annoying stubble on his chin that Usopp would always make fun of. Or he grew it out into a long beard. The man squinted his eyes at the thought, shaking his head. His friend wouldn’t do that, he wasn’t the type to like facial hair like that. And a blonde beard? That would just look strange.  

Usopp sighed and picked up his phone, drumming his thumbs against the keyboard. I mean, he could say hi to start. That wouldn’t be rude, right? It set the stage for a nice conversation! It was polite and cordial, and it said nothing about his desperation to hear his friend's voice again. So, he sent the message, ‘hi’. As he went to put his phone down, it buzzed. Oh. His eyes widened slowly at the realization Sanji had been waiting for him to respond for … ten minutes. Well, it wasn’t like he hadn’t done that before.  

Sanji’s message read, ‘Hi, Usopp. It’s Sanji. Can we talk?’ Weren’t they talking now? Or did he mean over the phone? If his friend wanted to call him all he had to do was that, just call. And if he was honest, the brunette was betting on this. He really wanted to hear that man’s voice again. How soft it was, and how calming it could be.  

So, he responded, ‘yeah let’s talk’. To which he instantly got the reply, ‘What’s your number, I got a new phone.’ Is that why they lost contact, because Sanji lost his number? I mean, that would make sense. But why for three years did he neglect to message Usopp and ask for it? Why was it now that he decided to message and break the ice? Unless something happened. Oh god, was he dying? Was his old best friend dying!? He was probably bald and sick, in the fetal position in a hospital bed!  

Usopp sent his number and set the phone down on the floor beside him. It was quiet. No calls or buzzing for a few minutes, to the point where the man had suspected Vinsmoke only wanted his number to block it. I mean, was this it? Was he never going to hear from him again? Was this a taste of something that was going to be taken even quicker than before? So, it surprised him, causing him to jump just a tad, when his ringer went off. There on the screen was an unfamiliar phone number with an even more unfamiliar area code. He did say he was going far… 

The brunette drummed his fingers against the side of his phone before clicking the answer button, turning it on speaker. God, was it always this nerve wracking to talk to him? Well, before all of this they lived practically next door to each other, in a town Usopp never left. Okay technically, he did leave- now he’s in the city over.  

“Usopp?” A light voice filled his ears from the other side of the phone. It was different from what he had remembered of Sanji’s prepubescent voice. It was airy and dainty, something that reminded him of spring, oddly enough. His voice was gorgeous, so pretty he barely even recognized it until he made a sort of strangled noise, causing his friend to laugh. There it was. The same laugh he was so used to it felt so homely to hear. A breathless laugh, the kind where you knew he’d be covering his open mouth with a lazy fist.

“Sanji,” he responded in a whisper, staring wide eyed at the screen. If only he could Skype on such a small device. That would be neat, right? “You’re real…” Usopp didn’t mean to say aloud, but he couldn’t help it. Some part of him really wished this would’ve happened sooner. Some part of him was dreaming about this day for three years. And that part of him had taken over, taking control of his mouth too.  

There was no response for a few seconds, before he heard the other say, “Of course I’m real… I can’t believe you responded to me.” He sounded shocked, as if he was in as much disbelief as the other man was. But they were both tiptoeing around the subject at hand. Why did Sanji leave him in the dark for three whole years? No messages or calls back? Why did he have to go so far away and seemingly never return until now?  

“Why did you go, Sanji?” Saying his name was foreign, but Usopp never wanted to stop. He missed how it felt on his tongue as it rolled off. He missed hearing his own name from his friend's lips, hearing how elegant it sounded compared to anyone else. That’s what he was, the blonde was elegant. In everything he did, he did it with poise and grace. God, in a way he kind of envied that. All that training in manners and etiquette from his dad really paid off, making the brunette look like a slob in comparison to the other. But he didn’t envy his friend's home life.  

What Sanji went through made sense as to why he’d want to leave. Why he’d want to abandon everything and start over in another country. Yet�� he always wondered why he wasn’t asked to come with him. Why didn’t his friend think, maybe my best friend should accompany me? Wasn’t it obvious? Usopp would have followed him to the ends of the Earth if it meant they could’ve been together- platonically that is… With wives. And sex! Yeah… 

It was becoming too quiet on the other end; the student half expected the blonde had hung up on him before he heard a small sniff. Small enough for him to know that he was going to get a loaded answer for his very loaded question.  

“I’m… not the same person,” he heard a shaky voice murmur into the phone, “I was scared you wouldn’t like it…” Wouldn’t like him? Was Sanji kidding? He loved who he was, every bit of it. How could he dislike or even hate him? Even if it had been so long, he couldn’t deny the fact he could never hate his best friend. No matter how hard he tried, Usopp physically couldn’t.  

“I’m happy,” he let out a cry, “I’m finally happy,” there he heard a hiccup, “I miss my home. I’ve been away from home for so long…”  

“Home?” Usopp asked, drawing a blank as to what home his friend missed. Last he checked, he wanted to get out of that house as quickly as possible. How could he miss it? 

“Home is with the people I love,” Sanji inhaled shakily, “I want to go home. I want to,” he hiccupped and sniffed, clearly sobbing more than he had intended to, “I want to go home, Usopp. I’m me and … I want to go home…” It was heartbreaking to hear his friend fall apart, all while he could do nothing but listen. Nodding his head as if the blonde could see it and rubbing the side of the phone as if it was his back. The man didn’t entirely understand all the words his friend sobbed about being himself, but he didn’t care. If he was happy, why was he needing to understand? All he wanted was his best friend back and now he got it, he wasn’t going to lose it.  

“Come home,” he answered, determination rising in his voice, “Please.”  

-

The plan was simple: Sanji and Usopp were going to have a good old-fashioned sleepover. I mean, what's to stop two best friends from sleeping in the same bed after two years? Nothing! If it was too awkward, he’d take the couch and let his guest veg out on his twin XL. Yeah, okay, it was going to be crammed, but nothing that they couldn’t handle!  

Usopp had been counting down the days until his best friend's flight came back, as he had transferred to his college to finish up his last year, Facebooking him any chance he could get. It was truly an addiction. Talking to his friend and being able to hear his voice whenever he so chose to. All the student had to do was pick up the phone and press a few buttons to hear that laugh, that sweet laugh he could trigger with just a few stupid jokes. Now it was the day of, or well, the morning of. Of course, he couldn’t sleep. It was due to a mixture of nerves and pure excitement at the thought of seeing his best friend. Although, his anxiety was beginning to outweigh those bundling feelings of joy, ever since he got the text, ‘When we meet. I need to tell you something important.’  

Okay, so this could have meant about two things: Sanji was dying, or Sanji had a girlfriend. It was more realistic to think his best friend was dying, since he never had luck with women. So that had to be it. I mean, what other major change could he have gone through in three years that fundamentally changed him as a person? At least, that’s what he kept alluding to, that something would be completely and utterly different. It didn’t feel different when they’d sit on the phone and talk into the depths of the night, or text as if no time had passed.  

That’s what scared him.  

What if the change was something more physical that Sanji was insecure about? What if, instead of dying, he had no arms? Or… no legs! That’s ridiculous, he thought, being an aspiring cook detailed a lot of hand work, so he made sure to keep his hands out of danger. So, if he didn’t not have arms or legs … maybe he shaved his head, or did something more permanent. A few tattoos wouldn’t scare him away, or even a lot of tattoos. The thought of his friend with tattoos wasn’t bad actually. As Usopp turned onto his side, trying to sleep, he couldn’t keep that image out of his head. The man who swore he’d quit cigarettes, shirtless with different inking's littering his body- And he sat up. Maybe he should do a pull up.  

It was weird to think of Sanji shirtless! I mean, who did that? Not him. Okay well, occasionally him. It was normal to figure out how time had treated the blonde and how different he would be now. It was normal to imagine how his skin would feel underneath his own hand, tracing small circles against his arm. How soft he was… would he stay that soft? Or has he spent so much time in the sun his skin has turned tougher, like leather. Maybe he did have a few tattoos, something small. Something meaningful in a place he could show off and hide just as easily. Red, it had to be red. If Vinsmoke got anything it needed to be small and with hints of red to contrast his pale skin.  

Usopp had done about twenty pull ups at his door before his roommate had walked out of his room- huh? Zoro had come out of Luffy’s room with a different outfit than what his roommate had seen him go to sleep in. Oddly, they had been becoming so close over the last month and a half. It was strange how they’d exchange glances or longing stares. Was longing even the right word for the types of looks they’d give each other? It was more intimate than that, if that was even a thing that could be considered intimate. Romantic, if he thought too much about it.  

Zoro hadn’t noticed him yet, his back turned to his roommate who was hanging off the pull-up bar in his doorway. He was walking around as if he could trigger a landmine at any moment, making sure each step was quieter than the last to his room. Now that was strange. The guy had never cared about being loud until it was sneaking from Luffy’s room to his own. He never cared until Usopp noticed the strangest looking mark on hi… oh. Slowly, he looked away and began to pull himself back up on the bar. It wasn’t his business anyway, no matter how much the little voice in his head told him to pry. It wasn’t like he wanted to be in on the loop if his roommates were dating each other. Not like he wanted to be the first to know, or anything.  

Was he wrong for feeling bitter? They never owed him anything, but he had assumed all of them were close. He always let Luffy use his fancy coffee maker and Zoro his DVD collection. And Usopp was the one who even suggested the three of them room together, over using the dormitories. They had been in the same English class, in need of roommates. It was a shot in the dark but it paid off. At least, he had assumed. Now, was it even worth it to ask what was up? Would a, “hey I know you guys are boinging but I wanted to know first so I could’ve made you a celebratory sodomy cake” be too weird? 

The student’s thoughts were interrupted by the fifth pull-up when Zoro opened his door, jumping at the sight of him, “How… long have you been there?” His eyes were wide, staring like he had seen a ghost. Usopp blinked a few times and pulled himself higher on the bar, before slowly letting go and jumping onto the floor. He could be honest and tell the truth; say he saw the mark and the fact they were being sneaky. There wasn’t any point in lying when they were both standing and staring at each other. His roommate's face was riddled with sleep, deep in his dark features as they exchanged looks. It would have been more awkward to say nothing, right?  

He went to speak, putting his hand on his own neck, which caused Roronoa to pull at the collar of his shirt. Over the mark. Just that movement alone had spoken more words than he had intended to, speaking volumes. It said, ‘I know you guys have been sneaking around and, yeah, I saw your neck thing’. It also said, ‘I wish you guys would’ve told me instead of hiding.’ Maybe the moss saw it on the others face, from how he frowned with anxiety, or how he darted his eyes to avoid the inevitable words to come.  

“So… You know, don’t you?” Zoro looked away before continuing, “I thought you’d be, I dunno, upset.” Upset? How could he be upset if his friends were happy? Usopp was more upset over the fact he wasn’t told, but it was neither here nor there. He had things to do that day and someone more important was coming, in all honesty. So, not that it didn’t matter. But he wasn’t going to ruin his day with a soured mood. Instead, he was going to take it in stride. Which was harder for him, but for Sanji he would.  

Usopp pressed his lips together and let his shoulders shrug loosely, “Zoro, you know I’d never be upset with you for something like that. I’m just glad you’re happy.” And he meant it. Even if he wasn’t told before, he knew now. That’s all that mattered, he supposed.  

The two heard a bit of shuffling behind the green-haired one as Nami appeared, looking as if she had just woken up from the sounds of their voices. She rubbed the side of her head with a gentle palm, her ginger hair pulled back into a messy bun, “Why the hell are you guys being so loud for 10 AM?” It was 10? How long had he been doing pull-ups? He must’ve miscounted… He swore he had done just 20… 

“Usopp knows me and Luffy are…” He trailed off, which elicited an offended gasp from his roommate. 

“Oh, you told Nami but not me?” Usopp frowned and pointed a finger at him, “I live with you! All she does is leech off our takeout orders!” He wasn’t wrong, she only did come over when Zoro and Luffy were in the city for food. Or when he needed emotional support 

“So mature Mr-I’m-having-my-old-situationship-sleep-in-my-bed-after-three-years!” She retorted, “He told me because I keep my mouth shut.”  

His eyes widened, “I shut my mouth!” He does not.  

Zoro narrowed his eyes, forming a tight smile, “Remember the pineapple?” 

“Yeah, pineapple!” Nami shouted to which Luffy’s door opened and he groggily peaked out, mumbling, “Hmhmgm pine…apple?” His boyfriend beckoned the sleepy student over with one arm and let out a breath as the other slumped into his side, clearly also just waking up.  

“Don’t bring the pineapple into this,” Usopp spoke, pressing his teeth together and restraining his jaw from making them grind together. 

“You did talk for the pineapple,” Luffy mumbled, pressing his face into Zoro’s pectoral, causing his other roommate to roll his eyes.  

“I had to tell the aut- you know what I’m not arguing with you guys,” he placed his hands on either of his hips, letting his foot tap against the wood as he debated what to say. Well, today was the day. His roommates knew vaguely who Sanji was, whereas Nami had had classes with him for several years. They knew he was blonde and liked to cook and, well, that was about it. There weren’t enough words in the human language, across all languages, to describe how truly amazing he was. How utterly fantastic he was to be around, how his company was unlike anyone else's he’s ever been in. So, he instead wanted them to get to know him themselves, rather than have some expectation of him built up.  

- 

“He said he’s at terminal B, with his luggage,” Usopp said as the group headed down the airport, looking for his old friend. Luffy and Zoro had been told to look out for a relatively tall, lanky man, with blonde hair covering his left eye. Simple enough, he supposed.  

Except for the sea of people he was searching through, he couldn’t find him. Where was the man he had been waiting for, for three years to see? He was searching through the crowds, hoping to stop and make eye contact with the person he had been, well, yearning for. Yearning was a very… Well, it wasn’t the word he was looking for but it was the closest one he had! Yearning without the homosexual undertones that he didn’t have because he wasn’t gay.  

“I think we passed term B,” Luffy chimed in, walking on his roommates left.  

The man turned his head, letting his curly hair fall behind him [that he had styled back into a ponytail for this occasion], as he gaped, “What do you mean we passed it!? Sanji’s probably waiting for us!” With that he stopped and turned on his heel, pulling his small cell phone from his jacket pocket to see if there were any new messages. Of course, it had been two minutes since he sent his message so there wasn’t a new notification.  

“I think he’ll be fine waiting,” Zoro gruffed, opting to stay behind the two eager ones with Nami, who enjoyed taking her time as well. It wasn’t a big deal to them if they got to Sanji right as his plane landed, but it was a big deal to the other two. Although Luffy was more so there for the ride. 

Usopp craned his neck to send a glare his roommate's way, “We are not making him wait any longer!”  

“I think an extra few minutes wouldn’t hurt,” Nami attempted to interject but she was slowly stopped by the vicious look that her friend hurled her way. He was so serious, more serious than she had ever seen him in his life.  

“It’s just rude to make people wait when they land from flights. He’s probably jetlagged! It’s really the principle of it,” and he continued on.  

He didn’t want to keep his friend waiting after so long. I mean, a flight that long surely had to have him worn out. Usopp knew all the blonde wanted to do was curl up and sleep, preferably with him. I mean, in the same bed. They always used to nap together in their high school years. It wouldn’t be too weird if they shared a bed again, so napping together shouldn’t be weird either. He just wanted to lie there, feeling his friend's body warmth beside him. Skin brushing against skin as the brunette let his hands trail to Sanji’s hair, lightly running his fingers through it. Combing through the strands.  

As he spoke, he didn’t notice a woman approaching him from behind. She was taller, looming over him with heels adorning her feet. Long blonde hair that was pulled back at the bangs to show two pairs of shining blue eyes. Nami was the first to spot her and when she did her eyes widened just a bit with understanding, before she smiled. Zoro and Luffy didn’t realize, ignoring her to focus on Usopp’s intelligible ranting about proper airline etiquette.  

“Um, excuse me?” The woman asked, lightly tapping Usopp’s shoulder. It brought him out of his words and made him turn his head. They looked at each other and there was an air of familiarity there. Something was different, but something was earnestly familiar. She looked like home, like someone he had waited for all his life finally back to him.  

“Can I help you?” Usopp ended up asking, although he had more questions than that. Who was she? She looked like someone he had known, but that face was long forgotten. This face was the face he had pictured when thinking about his friend, the original image lost to the depths of his mind. It couldn’t be … but it wouldn’t… could it?  He just stared, trying to piece together a growing puzzle before him. All the while her eyes were growing glassy.  

“Do I know you?” He asked, staring at her with narrowed eyes and a hollow expression. She felt so far away from him. Almost as if she was across the terminal and he had to run to see her, to feel her.  

“I’d hope so,” and there was the laugh. The laugh he knew so well.  

Had it just been three years? And was this the change? Only this?  

Why would this make him hate … her?  

It made so much sense now. All those longing glances to women, or their dresses, or the constant twirling of strands of hair between her fingers. The magazines he found underneath her bed, the lipstick she swore was her mothers. The lipstick he always wondered about. How it would look on her, contrasting her skin. She wasn’t the same person, no, she was herself now. Sanji was herself and Usopp couldn’t help but feel incredibly at ease seeing her, with grown out hair and mascara on her long lashes.  

“Usopp?” Sanji murmured, placing her palm against her forehead in disbelief. He nodded slowly, then again, and again until he forced himself into her arms. She wrapped her arms around him as he did for her, bracing her to his chest. She smelt like oranges and other sweet fruits, something homely. It wasn’t the smell he was used to, the one he remembered, but it was something he never wanted to end. His hands entangled in her hair, the strands he had been fantasizing about for days. He missed it, he missed the soft way it felt against his fingers.  

And he missed her. Her. Not anyone else. Not Sanji before, but Sanji now. Whoever he knew before was gone and he was so utterly glad. “You’re real…” He breathed out, pressing his face into her neck, “You’re so real…” The blonde let out a gasp and he could tell she was crying. Was he crying too? Maybe just a bit. Usopp didn’t think about the others watching them, and he didn’t care to remember them. All he wanted to focus on was her. How she felt in his arms and how he never wanted to let go. I mean, friends felt like this right? A protective urge to make sure she would never leave no matter what. She would never leave him. 

-

His roommates insisted on leaving the two of them in the airport cafe to catch up, wanting to look at the souvenirs instead. Although, Usopp wasn’t sure how interesting souvenirs from their home town would be. I mean, how many plush bears could they buy with their state abbreviation on them before it got boring? Either way, he wasn’t focused on that.  

He couldn’t help but stare at her. The way she stood as she ordered coffee for the both of them. She knew exactly what he wanted without having to ask, effortlessly laughing as the barista made small talk with her. Sanji’s lips shone in the pale light, a pretty pink painting them in a way he had never seen before. It was glossy and a bit sparkly too if he looked up closely. Pink was a pretty color, but he wanted to know what that lipstick from their childhood would have looked like. That dark red with hints of berry undertones against her pale skin tone.  

She insisted on waiting for the coffees while he found them a place to sit. Usopp didn’t mind, finding a nice seat by the window that looked out onto the rest of the airport. He sat down and found himself looking out the window for about a minute or so, before his attention drew back to her. Her hair had gotten so long, and it was pushed out of her face now. He remembered when they were younger and the blonde had insisted her hair should cover a bit of her face. He was so glad she had a clip pushing her hair back to show her eyes. Were they always that blue? Was there a chance her eyes had gotten bluer over the years? And that smile, it never changed. Maybe it was brighter now, more authentic. Prettier. Yeah, prettier. It suited her.  

As he watched her, he couldn’t help but notice the barista giving her a certain look. I mean, he knew she was attractive but that was a bit much. The way he almost outwardly flirted with her in an airport of all places made him frown. Okay we get it, he wanted to scoff, looking away to the window with a hand propping his head up. But then Usopp froze. Why was he feeling so … would jealous be the right word? No, protective? No, no. It felt almost like disgust, a visceral reaction to anyone hitting on her. Anyone getting near her… Anyone touching her- Oh god. This was new. He had never experienced this before. In fact, everything she did was making him feel so strange.  

He tried to swallow them as Sanji sat down across from him, two cups of coffee in her hands. She set one down in front of him and the other beside her, smiling nervously, “It was your old order in high school. I don’t know if you still like that stuff…” There was a weird feeling building in Usopp’s throat as she looked away. Everything she did was making him feel just that, weird. The way she pressed her glossed lips together, or how her eyelashes brushed against her cheek. Sure, she was pretty and he could acknowledge that, but she was starting to make him feel itchy in his skin.  

After he didn’t respond for a minute they made eye contact, and he remembered he had to speak, “Oh, uh, I like it. I haven’t had,” he turned the cup over to look at the order sprawled on the side, but his breath caught in his throat. Usopp didn’t realize she remembered every aspect of his order, down to the milk and pumps of syrup. He had assumed she knew the general order of a matcha latte, but he didn’t know she remembered it… all.  

“You remembered,” the brunette whispered instead, not bothering to finish off his sentence.  

Sanji’s eyes met his and she looked away in apparent embarrassment, a pink blush rising on her cheeks and forming down the bridge of her soft nose, “How could I not remember!” She laughed stiffly, “You used to order it all the time after school!”  

“It’s been three years. I didn’t even remember,” Usopp let himself smile, but he was soon overtaken by that weird uncomfortable feeling again. It settled in his stomach and made his smile falter for a moment. The feeling was different than anything he had felt toward his best friend before, causing him to come to a conclusion: He must be misogynistic.  

. 

.. 

… 

I’m misogynistic!? 

The wheels began to turn in his head, clicking as the gears grinded. It made so much sense. He had no issues with Sanji before but now he had issues. The only thing that was different was her gender, so he must have started hating women sometime after she left him. I mean, he always felt weird around Nami and the women he had crushes on, so it made sense that he secretly hated women without knowing he hated women. All the true misogynists were so misogynistic they didn’t even know it, being so deep into their anti-woman rhetoric, you see.  

It made sense. Every movement she made was making his skin burst aflame, as if he’d stop breathing if she kept looking at him like that. So now that he knew he hated women, what was he going to do!? I mean, she was going to be sleeping in his bed for a week! Well, until her dorm was ready for her to move into. It could be a week, or it could be well over a month. Not like he was complaining- oh but he was complaining! He was going to have to share a bed with a woman, the thing he just realized he hated! 

“Usopp?” Sanji’s voice broke through his thoughts, making him blink to remember where he was again. It was silly, he tried to calm himself. Maybe he wasn’t misogynistic but instead nervous to see her after so long! “Did you hear me?” She tilted her head, resting her chin on an open palm. The movement made his stomach do a flip, and he was back to the misogynistic drawing board.  

“Uh, repeat it for me again?” Usopp trailed off, smiling awkwardly.  

She nodded and continued a bit sheepishly, “I’ve been thinking about you for three years. So, I haven’t really forgotten…” The blonde’s finger traced small circles around her cup, not daring to drink it yet. Her eyes were on him, before she spoke again, “I really wanted to contact you, but I felt too scared that you’d-” But she was cut off by a signature awkward laugh from Usopp.   

“Haha! You! Scared? Me? Hah! I’m… bathroom now!” And he got up, darting from the coffee shop around the corner.  

God! How stupid was he! Of course, he’d have a misogynistic revelation right as he reunited with his best friend, totally ruining the moment. I mean, he could swallow it and hope that this wasn’t misogyny but instead pent-up anxiety coming out in the form of women hating, well, hatred. He should swallow it. The worst-case scenario was he could sleep on the couch and hope it would pass as the week went on. Yeah. It would pass. It would pass and he would be able to enjoy his best friend's company without all of these feelings floating around inside his head. Feelings if she got too close to that barista again, if she looked at him through her long eyelashes, or if she smiled. The smile he loved, the smile he still adored, was being tainted with his own women hating feelings now, wasn’t it?  

They got back to his apartment soon after that. Usopp tried his hardest to ignore his very weird outburst and make her comfortable, regaling her with a story about a play he had the honor of being a tree for back in his first year of college. He was able to swallow his hatred for a bit, focusing on anything else but her. Sitting on the couch, he opted to put Luffy in between them. He didn’t need Nami near him either. Two women was something he wasn’t ready to battle yet.  

Sanji got along with his roommates great, better than he could have ever expected. She offered to cook, although she didn’t have to. She practically insisted, begging them to let her try out a new recipe with whatever she could find in their cabinets [which would not be a lot]. As she cooked, she glided with ease across their small kitchen, going back and forth from boiling the rice to cutting the vegetables on a plate [since they didn’t own cutting boards]. The woman looked ethereal, making Usopp look away instantly when she caught him staring. Why was he staring so long? Was it the hatred of women seeping back out making him ultra focused on her movements so he could promptly feel disgusted afterwards? That had to be it!  

“Usopp,” she called, breaking him from his thoughts again. He turned on his heel and watched her smile form, “Could you tie my hair back?” She nodded down to her hands which were busy with raw chicken, doing whatever it was she had to do with that stuff. Usopp wasn’t big on cooking, so truthfully, he had no idea.  

Touch her. Touch her hair. Well, he had done it earlier when he was overcome with joy from seeing her. So, he could do this! He could do this! The student smiled tightly and followed her command, falling into a step to stand behind her. His hands ran through her strands as he had imagined doing so for days. Soft. It was so soft. When they initially met, he didn’t get the chance to truly soak in how soft her hair was. Usopp took a spare hair tie from his wrist and gathered her blonde strands by the base of her head, bringing it up into a soft bun. Something that he figured would suit her. Yeah. It was pretty.  

It was so pretty, as Sanji looked over her shoulder to thank him, a few hairs falling out of place from behind her ear. Without thinking, the man reached out and tucked them back behind her ear, taking his time dragging his fingers down her earlobe. As he realized what he had done, especially seeing her facial expression, he pulled away. Her lips had parted, as if she was about to speak, and her crystal blue eyes were widened. Why would he do that? Why would he go ahead and do that without thinking!? Stupid, stupid, stupid Usopp! He pressed his lips together and took a step back, wanting to apologize but he … couldn’t. He would have never done that to a man, so why did he do that to her? Did his women hating ideologies also mean he had to push their hair behind their ears and caress their earlobes, too!? 

“Usopp,” Sanji began but she was cut off with a nervous noise escaping his lips, followed by a, “HOLD ON!” The man turned away and made a b-line to his room, slamming the door shut behind him. His back pressed against the door, forcing it shut away from the world. No one else saw that, right? No one else should have. It was weird, God, he was so weird, wasn’t he? Of course, he was. No rational person would be misogynistic and no rational person would take it out on the one person he had been so excited to see for weeks. He was being such a bad friend, wasn’t he? Being so weird and thinking these things, and feeling these kinds of ways.  

Usopp turned the lock on his door and stumbled away to his desk. If he couldn’t come up with answers on his own, as to why he was feeling this way, maybe the internet could help him. It was a long shot, as he was never very good at the internet, but he could try. There was anything and everything on those forums he had heard so much about, there had to be something on misogyny, right?  

So, as he logged into Bing, waiting for his computer to load, he thought about what to search. He could go to Wikihow, and figure out how to tell if you’re truly misogynistic or just weird. Or… worst case scenario, both. Maybe he could go to this website he had heard about called Buzzfeed. Take a few quizzes and hope for the best, he supposed.  

The first quiz he found was titled, “Are you misogynistic?” It was straightforward and to the point, which was what he needed. The first few questions weren’t too weird, like do you have women friends and should women have the right to vote, all things he said yes to. Then it got a bit strange.  

“Do you think men are the superior gender…?” He read aloud, squinting a bit at the screen. Wasn’t that what misogyny was about? And if he was feeling uncomfortable around women, he was bound to think that too, right? So, he decided to click yes, moving onto the next question.  

The rest of the questions had that same kind of air to them, all about how men were superior and women being less than. Each question he chose the yes answer to, as he thought that’s what he felt. Clearly, though, as the audience we know better than that. When the answer screen came up, Usopp felt his world shatter. It said he had a probability of 85% being misogynistic, with the other 15% being inconclusive as to if he was or not. So, he was then. That was all the evidence needed. I mean, the internet was always right, right? Especially Buzzfeed, or whatever website he was on at the moment.  

He went to click out of the tab, but the man heard a knock on his door. He grabbed his laptop and slammed the top closed as the door opened, his best friend’s head peering through the door to look at him. Alone, sitting in the dark, panting a bit, was what she saw of him. Well, it was better than if she had seen the tab opened on his screen, right?  

“Are you okay? Dinners done, I brought you a plate if you didn’t want to eat with everyone,” Sanji spoke softly, as she always did. She was quiet as she entered, closing the door behind herself with her hip and lightly turning on a light. How was she always so kind to him, even if he was such a complete weirdo to her? Even in high school she offered him a kind ear and a plate full of food, even when he didn’t deserve it. He never deserved it. He never deserved her kindness, especially with this new revelation about his personal beliefs.  

“I’m okay,” Usopp smiled at her, reaching out for the plate as she handed it to him. Chicken fried rice, and it looked amazing. He hadn’t realized he was hungry until he smelt it, setting it on top of his closed laptop. His bed was in the center of the room, he noted as she sat down on the edge, just on the floor. The student had never thought to splurge on the fancy stuff like a box spring or a headboard. Sleeping practically on the floor was good enough for him, he supposed.  

“Zoro was telling me about a girl you liked last year. He said she was ugly,” she said suddenly, an air of teasing to her voice as she looked over at him, “I didn’t know you had piss poor taste in women.”  

He turned his head to his best friend, scrunching his face in disapproval, “He always brings her up. She was very pretty.” 

“Was?” She raised an eyebrow.  

“Is,” a frown pulled on his lips, “She’s pretty. Just into blood sacrificing stuff.” He shrugged, waving a hand in the air before continuing, “I think all my exes are pretty.” Exes. Usopp couldn’t believe he could even say he had exes. In high school he had always dreamed of being able to say he dated women, and now he could. It was kind of hollow, showing him, he couldn’t hold down a relationship even if he tried. Three ex-girlfriends, all a copy pasta of each other. Was that misogyny, too? Dating women who looked the same? 

“How many exes have you had?” Sanji asked curiously, “I’ve only had maybe … five,” she said, as though it wasn’t a large number. As if it could be larger. That was Sanji for him, always thinking there could be more when it came to romance. More women, more men, or stuff like that.  

“Oh wow, I’ve just had three. I think we went to high school with almost all of them,” and he listed their names, ticking them off with his fingers. Sanji’s eyes hardened as she watched him, her brow slightly furrowing as he continued on, detailing when they dated and when they broke up. “They all wanted me after I, you know, got more fit.” He motioned to his person a bit stiffly, trying to laugh under her intense gaze. Had he said something wrong? Was it weird to talk about exes with your old friend? 

“They’re all blonde,” Sanji murmured after a moment, her lips barely ghosting one another as she spoke. They looked so full in the dull light of his room, glittering from the angle he was at. For a split second, Usopp wondered how they would feel underneath his fingers. Just trailing his thumb across her bottom lip before letting go and pushing away. How would the skin on her face feel under his palm, as he cupped her face. How would she react if he nuzzled his nose against her cheek and inhaled her citrus like scent?  

He hadn’t thought about the fact they were all blonde. I mean, they did kind of look the same. Usopp nodded, “I guess they are. Are your ex's blonde, too?” He raised his eyebrows, still not quite understanding why her gaze was so intense.  

“No,” she breathed out, “Brunette. I like brunettes better.” Usopp’s stomach turned into a knot, panging deep in his body as she spoke. Why did that make him feel so incredibly nauseous? Was just hearing about her type triggering his misogyny!?  

He blinked a few times and pressed his lips together to attempt to form a line, but it was breaking into an awkward smile, “You know I’m tired. I think I’m gonna sleep,” the student stood and motioned to the bed, “You don’t have to go to sleep now if you don’t want.” He just needed and out of these feelings building in his chest, and if it meant sleeping a bit early, he’d do it. I mean, he could always see his roommates tomorrow. And knowing Nami, she’d be staying for as long as she wanted if it involved free food.  

Sanji stood as well, nodding her head slowly, “I’ll get ready.” That was all she said before she exited the room and left the man alone with his thoughts. Well great, he was going to have to sleep in the same bed with the gender he just found out he hated. He had hoped she was going to stay up with his roommates so he would be asleep by the time she went to sleep. But he couldn’t get everything he had ever wanted, right? Instead of complaining, he pulled his shirt off and slid on some pajama pants, plopping down onto the side of the bed he always slept on the most, the right. He laid on his side and covered himself with a few blankets, trying to will himself to sleep before she got back.  

There was a fifteen-minute period where he was alone, where Usopp tried so desperately to sleep. When the door opened again, and he was still awake, he mentally groaned and turned on his back to see her. Sanji was wearing a tank top that framed her body and her new assets well- although he wasn’t staring! He wasn’t a pervert! No, he was a misogynist.  

Quickly, he glanced away and turned on his other side to face where she would be laying. She sat down onto the bed and shuffled onto the mattress, covering her side in a blanket and staring at him. Her face was bare from makeup, showing bits of freckles poking across her cheeks. Her eyelashes looked the same, and her lips did too. They were still pink, maybe stained from whatever product she had worn before. But soft, they looked so utterly soft. He really just wanted to reach out and touch her face, for a moment.  

“Hi,” Usopp whispered, blinking slowly at her.  

“Hey,” she replied, brushing one of her hands past her ear to push some hair from her face, “I missed this.”  

“Staring at each other?” He raised an eyebrow, to which she nodded.  

“Yeah. I like watching you sleep,” a smile pulled at Sanji’s lips as she looked away, “Did you watch me sleep?”  

Usopp looked away as well, trying his hardest to ignore his thoughts and those overwhelming feelings brewing in his throat, “I mean…”  

“Be honest,” she put a hand on his, that had been resting on the pillow before him. It was soft, sending electric waves through his body as she intertwined their fingers, “You’re going to make me sound creepy if you don’t answer, Usopp.” She was always soft, he thought, remembering their old sleepovers. She was soft and warm, and plush, and God, she always smelt good. He had to admit, he wouldn’t just watch her sleep. He’d bask in her everything until she woke and he’d pretend to be asleep.  

He hesitated, before nodding, “Yeah, I have.” Then it was quiet for a few beats before he spoke up again, “If I fall asleep first are you gonna watch me?” Her hand was so warm, almost lulling him into sleep. If only she was just beside him, pressed against his chest so he could bury his face in her hair… Usopp blinked a few more times, quicker than before as he tried to snap himself out of that thought process. God, that was creepy! Clearly, being misogynistic also meant he was bound to be creepy too.  

Sanji smiled, biting down on her bottom lip, “Maybe. Only if I really want to.”  

“If you want to?”  

“I want to lay next to you,” she spoke quietly, squeezing her hand that held his, “Like we did when we were younger.”  

For just one moment, he wanted to pretend nothing had changed. For one night, he wanted to act like they were back in high school, holding each other and talking about nothing until the sun rose. For one night, he wanted to press a kiss to her shoulder while she slept, knowing she was still coherent enough to remember it the next day. And for one night, he wanted to be the one to fall asleep last. He knew Sanji felt the same way. He knew all she wanted was to go back and pretend nothing had changed, that three years wasn’t three years but a day. That she never left but instead stayed, lived with him. Moved in with him at college. Cooked him food every day. Was his- his friend that is. 

But he had to realize that she chose to live her life away from him, instead of what could’ve been. She chose to leave and every day he had to come to terms with the fact that it never would happen. She would never live with him, cook for him, or stay by his side. Because instead of a day passing, as he so desperately wished, three years left.  

He was completely different now. 

“Okay,” Usopp finally said, letting go of her hand forcefully and patting the space between them, “C’mere,” he mumbled, letting a new wave of exhaustion take over his face. He closed his eyes and felt two slender arms wrap around his back and her face press against his chest. This wasn’t the position he had expected her to take, but he didn’t mind. He pulled her in and curled around her form, chin resting atop her head.  

For one night, they were going to pretend like no time had passed. Even if it was so apparent that it had.  

-

Usopp hated waking up that week. It wasn’t anyone’s fault but his own, being thrust out of his peaceful dreams into a misogynistic sweat. Every day, he awoke to see Sanji nestled beside him, snoring lightly. Her hair was splayed across her forehead and her hand was always interlocked with his. Fingers twitching from deep sleep. It was cute for a moment, before that panging anxiety filled him. And he was back to realizing that this wasn’t as he wanted. He was holding her but at what cost? Secretly, deep down, he hated her and her gender. Everything she stood for; his subconscious hated it.  

That’s what he told himself, at least. 

A week had passed and her dorm still wasn’t prepared for her to live. It didn’t matter to her, meaning she got to spend more time with her old best friend. That was all she seemingly wanted, and it pained him to feel these feelings. Every time he saw her, his heart caught in his throat and made the words he wished he could say barely come out. Every time they made eye contact, he forgot where he was and uttered nonsense to cover it up. And every time she touched him, held his hand, brushed her arm against his, he felt like he was burning from the inside out.  

That morning especially, he was on fire. His arm was on the pillow beside him, hooked around the blonde as she clung to it. As if it was just natural to touch him like that. Usopp had been awake for a bit before she stirred, just watching her. He watched as her breathing steadied and her eyes slowly fluttered open. It was anxiety inducing to hear her groan and turn to face him. Her eyes widened just a bit seeing him stare back at her quizzically. 

“Did I wake you?” She murmured, bringing her soft fingers to push blonde strands away from her face. Sanji looked like a dream, painted by the finest oil paints for Usopp to drink in. For a moment he forgot his misogynistic feelings, his anxiety, all of it. He was stuck watching her chapped lips and her tired, sunken eyes with awe. She was beautiful, in every sense of the word. No- she was more than beautiful. She was ethereal.  

“No, I’ve been up,” Usopp breathed out, bringing his right arm to wrap around her waist, resting his hand against her back. It was unconscious, pulling her in and relaxing at her laugh. For a moment he forgot why he was so anxious to be around her. He forgot his anxieties and instead focused on her warmth, radiating off of her body onto his. 

“I had a dream about you,” her voice was quiet, whispering against his skin. 

“Hm? What was it about?” Usopp asked, looking down at his friend.  

“I cooked you eggs and then you exploded. Oh, because it was so good, you know,” Sanji laughed as he looked away to her shoulder, letting his thumb rub small circles into her back. It was quiet as they fell into a nice silence, that she broke after a few seconds,  “Usopp?” The brunette looked down at his friend, “Do you want to do something today?” At that, he glanced away. He never said no to her, at least he tried not to. And hanging out with her was always fun … in a group setting. The truth of the matter was he had been avoiding one on one interactions, even cutting their late-night talks short by feigning sleep.   

“Yeah, I think Luffy’s probably available- oh and Nami. I think Zoro’s working…” Usopp shifted onto his back, as he thought aloud, adjusting his arms to keep his left around her, while the other stretched out to the ceiling, “We could go to the mall. They have a Macys with, you know,” he glanced at her, “Clothes.” 

Sanij sat up, pressing her palm to her brow bone as she stretched her body away from her friend. She always opted to wear loose fitted tank tops when she slept, which Usopp always tried not to stare at. Being a new misogynist, he realized that creepiness was a part of it too. He tried to push away as much as possible. Yet, every time he saw her exposed skin, he couldn’t help but feel sick. A sickness that called to him, begging him to touch her skin. Just feel it beneath his fingers and wonder why it was so warm. 

“What if,” she looked back at him with her voice tight from her ongoing stretch, “We went alone?” Her hand slipped into her blonde hair, fingers entangling by the root. Slowly, she combed down to her long ends, repeating the motion methodically as she waited for an answer. Usopp never wanted to deny her anything her heart desired, truly, but this was going to kill him. If he was alone with her for more than a few minutes, he was fine. But a few hours? The entire day? Oh, he was going to have to plan his funeral now! 

The man looked away, pressing his lips together, “Yeah,” a croak escaped his lips as he sat himself up, “Yeah, let’s do it.” He gave her a tight smile, something he hoped she wouldn’t read into. Something he hoped she wouldn’t try to ask about later.  

Sanji gave him a small look, but it melted away into a smile, “I can make us breakfast.”  

The brunette shook his head, “Nooo, you’ve been making breakfast everydayyyy.” Not that he didn’t love her cooking, but he didn’t want her to overwork herself, cooking every meal for him. Instead, he pulled his phone out and handed it to her, on a Food Delivery app, “Get Chinese.”  

Sanji took his phone and tilted her head, “What about Indian?” She asked, scrolling through the app and pressing the tile for Chinese restaurants in their area anyway. 

“I had that, like, two weeks ago,” Usopp peered over to the phone to watch as she inputted her order, “And I’ve been craving Chinese for, like, two weeks.”  

The blonde looked at him, narrowing her eyes, “What happened two weeks ago?” Well, two weeks ago she contacted him. And two weeks ago, Zoro had promised Chinese food, only to bring home Indian food. Which was delicious, but not at all what he had been craving.  

“Zoro lied to me,” a laugh came from his lips before he could help it, “I think he had an accident at birth that made him, you know, directionally challenged,” Usopp spoke, waving his hand with a slightly limp wrist to convey his point.  

“Oh, he was a preemie?” Sanji handed him his phone, which he saw also had his order on it too. She had remembered it.  

The thought pulled at his heart and caused a wave of nausea, as he replied, “No he was born.” 

She stared at him for a moment, silently figuring out what it meant. Until it clicked and she laughed, leaning back on the bed and putting a hand over the top of her collarbone, “Oh! He was the accident!” 

Sanji’s laugh was incredible. He couldn’t help but stare as she smiled, letting out tumbling breaths of laughter. Strands of blonde hair fell into her face as she leaned forward and brushed her index finger at the corner of her eye, stopping the incoming tears from her joy. It wasn’t even that funny of a joke, let alone Usopp’s funniest joke. But she found it funny. In some way, she found it funny and it did something to him. It pulled his stomach down and then up, stretching it thin in his body as he watched her.  

Oh, he was going to be sick.  

Usopp stood up and made his way to the door as she steadied her breathing, giggling and repeating the joke occasionally to herself.  

“I’m gonna get ready,” he called out, forcing his own body to move as he went into the bathroom and locked himself inside. His brown eyes stared back from across the sink as he hunched over the porcelain. This wasn’t normal. This couldn’t be normal misogyny. Misogyny was a hatred for women, not the gender making you sick! I mean, unless he had unlocked some kind of rare form of true misogyny. Unless he was the ultimate misogynist who felt so much hatred it manifested into sickness.  

His hands gripped the edge of the sink as his breathing came to him in shallow bursts. Never before had he felt like utter garbage, especially because of her. Because she was doing nothing more than laughing, God he was a prick. He had to call someone, tell someone. Ask for help. Pray for help and hope they could save him from this level of pure evil. 

Shakily, the man pulled his phone from his pocket. Who could he call? Nami was probably asleep somewhere in the apartment, Luffy was at the gym at this time, and Zoro was at work. Calling Nami was the obvious answer, but she didn’t answer the phone. He didn’t want to tempt fate and call her multiple times in fear of sparking her rage. Luffy was the next answer, but he wasn’t very good at keeping secrets or truly understanding human emotions. He was a good friend, but not good with feelings. 

So, Zoro was his last resort. He called, and called, until the moss answered exacerbated, “Long-nose you better be dying,” he gritted out through apparent clenched teeth, on the other line. Okay, so that might have been a mistake, the brunette thought as he awkwardly stared back at himself. He couldn’t recognize the disheveled man before him, who looked like he had seen a ghost. 

“Zoro-” Usopp tried quietly, but he was interrupted with a rant.  

“What is so important you had to call me ten times!?” Okay so this was definitely a mistake.  

“Zoro let me-” Cut off again.  

“You’re so lucky I was outside taking out the trash-” Zoro spat as he was cut off by a loud, “I’M MISOGYNISTIC!” 

It went silent on that end; however, he could hear shuffling come from outside. It sent a sinking pang of fear through Usopp’s stomach as he came to the realization Sanji must have heard him. 

The image of her crumbling because of his words- no, his beliefs- it was making him sick. If she cried because of his words, fell apart and sobbed, he would hate himself. He would hate every fiber of his own being if he was the reason she spoke low of herself, or even thought lowly of herself. He never wanted her to hurt, let alone from his stupid actions.  

“Usopp did you say something?” He heard her voice suddenly through the door, knocking gently on the white wood. A wave of relief flooded his features as he realized, no, she didn’t hear him. She probably heard a commotion and went to check on him, because of course she would. Because she was kind. 

The male released a breath and closed his eyes, deflating back against the sink, “No, Sanji,” he called back, placing the phone to his ear to hear more silence, “Zoro…?”  

There wasn’t a response for a bit, until he heard a small groan, “I’ll have Luffy take Sanji out when I get home. So, me, you, and Nami can understand what the hell you mean by misogynistic.” And the line clicked on the other end, leaving him to stare back at himself.  

-

The two drove in silence to the mall, with some soft music playing from the radio. It was a song Usopp didn’t quite catch the name of but Sanji enjoyed it, humming along quietly as she gazed out the window at the large city buildings. Living in the town over from his childhood home, he knew the area like the back of his hand. The roads were slightly congested, but as they delved away from the heart of the metropolis into the outskirts of town, it got smoother.  

“You know, there is something I want to buy,” Usopp began, signaling to change lanes to the right turn lane, craning his neck over to check it was empty. The car ride was comfortable, especially since he knew he would be able to finally get this weight off of his chest. Get this dark secret off and tell someone without consequence. Well, not that many consequences anyway. 

“What are you gonna buy?” Sanji glanced over at him. She had brought her makeup, setting up a small station on the floor beside the full length mirror her best friend had. She could do it in a few minutes, as if it was perfect. And it was perfect. The wing of her eyeliner brown and subtle, with a few coats of mascara, a bit of concealer, and blotted pink lipstick. All of which Usopp had no idea were things until she explained it to him as she went, earlier. 

He looked at her and smiled, “Surprise.” When they were teenagers, he found a bottle of lipstick in Sanji’s room. She swore it was her mothers, as he investigated the tube. It was a dark shade of red forever burned into his cranium, down to the brand and shade name. He had thought about it every night for weeks after he found it, wondering what it would’ve looked like on her mouth. How it would accentuate the fullness of her bottom lip and her pronounced cupid's bow.  

“Oh, come on, give me a hint,” she frowned, lightly pushing his shoulder.  

Usopp laughed, as they pulled into the mall parking lot, not budging, “Nope. I’ll buy it and you can see it afterward,” a promise fell from his lips as he found a parking spot. It was somewhat by the entrance, showing off the old architecture of a mall that was stuck in the decade prior. But it was comforting, it reminded him of his childhood. This was the mall he always went to growing up, especially with her.  

They got out of the car and walked to the entrance, which he made sure to hold the door open for her. She simply shook her head with a smile, trying not to let it take over her face. It hadn’t changed in about ten years since he started coming there when he was about thirteen, everything stuck in a haze of the nineties. It was nice, especially since he saw Sanji’s face begin to light up as she was filled with a sense of familiarity. She slowed her steps and took it in, gazing with wide eyes at the place before her.  

“Do you remember when we went to the Blockbuster and you tried to rent the R-rated movie?” Usopp asked after the silence was stifling, nudging her shoulder with his own, “Kate Winslet had you in a choke hold.” This was easy. If he didn’t think about it, if he forced himself to swallow his anxiety, it was easy. She was … comfortable. She was home. 

“It was pg-13,” she breathed out, slowly turning her face to look at him, “Where’s the Macy’s?” Sanji’s cheeks were a light pink, different from earlier. She hadn’t applied blush in her makeup routine, unless the cold was starting to nip at her skin.  

Usopp led her to Macy's, breaking off from her as she went to look at clothes. He promised he’d return after he found the bathroom, which was a total lie. Instead, he found himself in the makeup section. It was memorized deep in his skull the name, which shocked the woman at the counter when he said, “I need to find MAC Cosmetics Lipstick in Spice It Up.” She hesitated for a moment and then nodded, pointing him to a row of lipsticks all without the tubes so he could pick the color.  

Instantly, it caught his eye. The color hadn’t changed much over the years, although he remembered it looking a bit more vibrant than the slightly dull maroon he came face to face with. The tube was black, as they all were. But it was hers. It was the deep red he had remembered yearning to see contrast against her pale skin, like drops of blood against white snow. He remembered rolling the tube in his hand and imagining how she would apply it, how she would press her lips together and how it would … look. Usopp picked up the box where the lipstick laid in, paying for it almost instantly. The money didn’t matter, the only thing he could focus on was the fact he was going to see her wear it.  

Usopp found Sanji looking at green blouses a few sections over, running her hands over the fabric and feeling it between her fingers. She studied the material with a keen eye, trying to find the best match for her. It would look amazing, he knew it. He approached her, clearing his throat to gather her attention. The blonde looked over at him and he raised the bag that said “Mac Cosmetics” awkwardly, with a small smile.  

Her eyes widened at the sight, “Usopp… What did you get?”  

“A surprise,” his grin widened as he reached into the small bag, pulling out the tube he had unboxed a few minutes prior, “An old surprise.” He waved it a bit then handed it over to her, where their hands overlapped. Sanji held onto his hand for a few silent moments, staring at her hand over his. Her eyes were glassy, fogged over with a hint of nostalgia creeping into her features. She knew. Of course, she knew exactly what it was even from the tube alone.  

“You remembered?” She looked up at him, pulling her hand away and popping the cap off the lipstick. She twisted the container and out came the color. He was right, it was perfect for her. Her hand entangled into her hair, pressing against her scalp, “I didn’t think you’d even remember the color. I didn’t even…” It was a look of disbelief as she lightly tapped the top of her head a few times with her palm, trailing off from her thought.  

“Of course. C’mon, can I put it on you?” Usopp extended his hand, before he truly understood what he had just said. How could he even think that was a good idea? He wasn’t worthy to hold her face, cradle it in his hands, and gently press the stick to her mouth. He wasn’t worthy to be the one who applied it, even though he really wanted to. It wasn’t normal to want it this bad, it had to be the misogyny talking or something like that.  

He hesitated to speak again, but she nodded and handed it back to him, “Do it. But don’t get it all over me, long-nose,” a small fond smile pulled at her lips.  

“Oh, don’t tell me Zoro taught you that,” he frowned and twisted the tube back down a bit, so not as much product was extended. She laughed as a response and he stepped forward, breaking the distance and forcing himself into her personal space.  

Slowly, his left hand cupped her jaw, with his thumb coming to rest on the underside of her chin, tilting her face upwards. Sanji’s eyes darted from the ceiling to the brunettes, watching with stiff eyes as he brought the lipstick to her bottom lip. He had never applied a woman's makeup to their face before, but he knew you had to be gentle about it.  

Methodically, he pressed the tube of red onto her bottom lip, dragging the tip down from the center of her lip to the bottom, before curving it around the edge of her lip and dragging it to the corner of her mouth. He had seen this done in a movie once, many years ago. And Nami had applied lipstick around him loads of times. The student just needed to go into his mind and unlock those memories. 

The top part of her lips was an easy task, following the natural curvature of her upper cupid's bow and connecting it back to the corner. Delicately and carefully, he patted the product into the center of her mouth, continuing until it was darkened enough. He didn’t want it to be too much; It needed to be just right. As he applied it, Sanji’s eyes stared into his face. She stared with a new look of fondness he hadn’t even seen before, and when he asked her to press her lips together, she looked away quicker than she typically would. 

It was silent, as he watched her shyly pull out a compact mirror to admire the color, he knew she had wished she could’ve worn years prior. She looked ethereal if that was even the correct word to capture her otherworldly level of beauty. It brought out the deep crevices of her face and painted in her ways he never once thought about. She was an oil painting that he had slaved years and time away to create, until she was perfect. And she was perfect. She had always been just… perfect. 

“You did good,” Sanji closed her compact, bringing his thoughts back to reality, “For a beginner.” A smirk tugged at her painted lips and he felt a wave of nausea through his body. He tried to push it away, as she continued, “I never let myself wear it back then. I bought it and stared at it for hours but,” she exhaled, “I’ve never been brave enough to wear it.”  

“You look really good,” Usopp replied, before a heat rushed into his skin, burning it with a deep red, “I mean- Not that you typically don’t- You do- You always look good- I mean you know what I mean… right?” His voice trailed off with anxiety, as his eyes squeezed shut. 

His eyes didn’t stay shut for long, as a subtle hand on his upper arm made them flutter open. She was watching him with a wide-eyed expression, that same pink blush caressing her cheeks. In that light, she was prettier than she had ever been. She was glowing. She was an angel from Earth who had come to take him away. In that moment, he forgot everything he was supposed to worry about. His anxiety, that stupid misogyny, all of it. He forgot it and lived in her presence. He forgot it and lived like she was the only thing worth living for. In that split second of time, Usopp even forgot who he was as he stared back at her with a slightly agape mouth.  

“I know…” Sanji smiled at him, pulling his forearm with her as she began to walk toward the escalator. Like a limp rag-doll, Usopp let her drag him with ease. She had always been stronger than him, even if he had a different body all these years later. Maybe it was because he let her throw him around, because he didn’t have the heart to use his actual strength, let alone fight back. He watched her as she stepped onto the first step and began to drift upwards, waiting for him to follow.  

He always would. 

- 

They arrived upstairs, to the home goods section. It was dystopian to walk around in a department store with a girl he didn’t think he’d ever see again, and he wouldn’t have had it any other way. It was silent as she led him, looking at the different furniture with a soft glance. He tried to focus on the chairs or the different couches, but his gaze went back to her. Every time, his eyes found their way back to her face, her hair, her red lips, all of it. As they stood by one couch, looking at it as she prattled on about how it would look good in Usopp’s living room, she slowly trailed off. Sanji’s expression shifted, as if she was holding back a smile. She pressed her lips together, biting down on her bottom lip tentatively. Her thoughts were clear on her face that she was debating something, mulling it over visibly.  

“Sanji��?” Usopp breathed out, looking at her and waiting for a response back to signal she was okay. The blonde looked at him, taking both of his deep hands with hers. She enveloped them with her warmth and pulled him in, both metaphorically and physically. There was no space between them as they watched each other.  

“Do you hear the song?” She asked, in a quiet tone. It was a song playing over the speakers that was barely audible to him at first. But then he heard it and slowly it captured his ears in a rhythmic tune. He had never heard it before, but clearly, she had, as she hummed along. “I love this song,” Sanji continued, beginning to sway slowly, “Will you…?” She looked between them, raising their entangled hands up to his eyeline.  

She wanted him to dance with her in the middle of a Macy’s. The thought made Usopp want to push away and laugh nervously, declaring he couldn’t embarrass himself like that. But the thought made him want to take her close and hum along too, even if he knew none of the lyrics. The thought made him want to hold her and sway, even if it was just to appease her for two minutes. Two minutes he was going to cherish for as long as humanly possible until it was all over and he was back to being riddled with anxiety. Anxiety that was so far away now, he could barely taste it.  

Usopp pulled her in, taking her left hand in his right and holding it out, while his left arm rested on the small of her back. Her head of blonde hair rested against his collarbone, letting his nose brush against the top of her hair. It smelt better than he realized, something fruity. She was a bundle of summer wrapped into a person's body. Like a ray of sunshine, embodied as a person.  

Sanji’s voice was soft against his ears, singing gently along to the song that was barely audible to him. All he could hear was his own heartbeat and that faint singing. The lyrics were barely visible on her tongue, but he cherished it. Her voice was above a whisper, as if she was soothing herself rather than trying to be known. Almost like she didn’t realize she was singing along.  

Then she squeezed his hand, trying to remind herself she was here with him. Like … she was reminding herself he was truly real. Like she wasn’t sure if this moment would fade and she would wake up alone in a room halfway around the world. Like this moment could disappear at any time and they’d both be left to mourn the shattered pieces. 

He realized he couldn’t let her go. As much as he knew they needed to break apart when the song was done, he physically couldn’t let go. His body wouldn’t let him. He’d keep her caged in his arms for as long as he could until she broke from it. Then he realized she wasn’t going to break away any time soon.  

Not at all. 

-

“Okay, so, let me get this straight: You’re a misogynist now?” Zoro’s voice rang into Usopp’s ears and brought him back to reality, where he was sitting on the floor with his back to the couch as his friends sat across from him. Luffy had been kind enough to make up a cooking excuse to get Sanji out of the house so they’d have at least an hour alone with the famed misogynist as he explained his entire thought process. 

Nami’s eyebrow quirked up as she leaned behind on one palm, “Is that why you’ve been acting weird? Did you discover 4chan or something?” She asked, turning her head to watch her friend. 

Just a few hours prior he had forgotten all about it. All the misogyny, all the nerves building up inside his body making him shake. But now it was all out in the open for his friends to dissect and pick through, making the man feel completely naked under their stare. He was baring himself to them with his struggle, a struggle he didn’t even know he had until Sanji appeared back into his life. This could be the answer to help him, to get rid of it once and for all. 

“Well, no,” he inhaled stiffly, “It’s about Sanji. She makes me feel so nauseous and gross, and it’s never been this bad before. So I went onto Buzzfeed-” Usopp began but he was cut off by a snort from Zoro. 

“Buzzfeed? You trust that shit?” He chuckled to himself. 

“Hey,” Nami swatted her pale hand at her friend, lightly hitting the bridge of his nose as he frowned, “Let him continue. Even if it started from Buzzfeed.” Her words were sarcastic and pointed, garnering another laugh from the moss beside her. 

Usopp looked away. They didn’t seem to understand this ran deep. This was affecting him so much and it was all fueled by hate. A hatred he had and harbored, that could easily hurt the one person he cared so much about. He never wanted to be the reason she cried. He never wanted to be the reason she left again. His ginger friend’s face hardened when she saw his anxious expression. Then it hit her. It wasn't just a stupid joke he was going to say, with some stupider punchline at the end. It wasn’t something that was funny. No, it couldn’t be funny. Hurting Sanji would hurt him so much more than anyone would ever be able to understand. It was serious to him so it had to be serious to her too. 

“Go on,” she spoke softly, nudging his knee with her foot so they could make eye contact. Her eyes said more words than she ever could, trying to be comforting in some way. 

“Every time I see her, I feel so sick. And when she touches me my skin gets all hot and itchy… Buzzfeed said I was misogynistic when I put in all my symptoms,” he said low, shame rising in his throat, “A-And I feel terrible. She cares about me and here I am being all hateful.” 

Zoro watched him, blinking slowly. He was silent as he processed this information, trying to fully grasp what Usopp meant. Then he spoke up, “Do you hate women?” Eliciting a smack from the woman beside him. The brunette looked up from his lap and he continued, “Do you really hate women?”

“Can you try and be sensitive?” Nami retorted back to him. 

“I am! It’s good to ask questions when your friend is self diagnosing as a misogynist,” he spoke through gritted teeth, narrowing his eyes at the girl. 

“No,” Usopp’s voice made the both of them look at him, “I don’t really hate anyone. But if I’m not misogynistic how can that explain m-” Before he could explain further, Zoro waved a hand in the air. 

“You have a crush- OW YOU CUNT-” Zoro began but was instantly cut off by a smack from Nami, which sent him falling backward onto the wooden floor.

“You can’t just tell him he has a crush! You have to ease him into it!” She reprimanded, pointing a finger at the moss, “He can’t handle all that in one go!” 

“He’s an adult,” he groaned, propping himself up on his elbows to stare at her, “I think he can handle knowing he’s in love.” 

She pushed his forehead back, “In love and crush are two different things, idiot!” The man fell back, onto the wood, letting out a breath of defeat. He was stronger than everyone in the apartment, although Luffy rivaled him in that area. It was clear from that interaction alone, he was letting her have her way with him. Zoro never really minded letting people hit him, he had no reason to fight back if it was his friends. And half the time it was. 

All the while as they bickered and pushed, Usopp was seated across from them. His eyes began to unfocus and blur the world before him, turning it into street lights on a night sky. Streaky and blurry against his irises, as he sat and took it in. He wasn’t in love, he was the furthest thing from being in love. No, love was different. He had been in love before when he was younger, with one of his first girlfriends. It was intimate, quick, and it was fun; nothing like the torture he was enduring. 

Sanji’s mere presence made him sick, made him unable to think of nothing but her, made him sweaty and prickled with heat on his cheeks, and made him a terrible person. Around her he felt comforted when he was far away from that mindset, but when it came back he could focus on nothing more than his breathing to ground himself. I mean, it was like this when they were in high school, but to such a lesser extent. He was always on edge around the blonde, breathing heavily and clammy. But that was normal. All friends were like that. All friends wanted to be near each other every day. All friends cuddled into the depths of the night, until it was practically suffocating for them to even think about letting go. 

Friends touched each other, against bare skin for practice. Friends would spend nights upon nights talking until sunrise, because there was so much more to say. Friends kissed the skin on their friends neck every night, as a way to say good night. And friends shared intimate moments since they were young and stupid, and, of course, it wouldn’t mean anything in the moment- or the day after. Of course, they’d never speak about it again. 

Of course, they were best friends.

Then it began to click, all the pieces falling into place. He never heard Zoro talk about Nami like that, how they’d steal glances and wish it would last forever. Or how when their hands touched it felt electric. They never spoke about how hard it was to sleep when the person you loved the most was pressed against your chest and breathing softly into the pillow beside you, so quietly you could barely hear her. But you knew she was there, and that was the most comforting aspect. 

Usopp looked down into his lap, frowning deeply. How could he have not seen he was… in love? 

“Guys?” He croaked, causing them to perk up mid-fight to look at his astonished face, “Am I stupid…?”

Nami hesitated as Zoro blurted out, “Yes.” Causing her to tackle him again and punch his frame, which he let her do as the floor was too comfortable for him to fight back.

“God, I’m so stupid!!” Usopp groaned, turning and burying his face into a pillow where he screamed just a little bit. How could he not have seen it wasn’t misogyny but years of neglected and intense feelings coming up to the surface to bite him in the ass? Maybe he shouldn’t have invested in a mechanical engineering degree if he couldn’t even deduce a simple crush.

“Why are you stupid?” A voice rang in his ears, causing the student to raise his head from the pillow. He saw Sanji, standing above him with a curious expression. She came back a lot sooner than he thought, with Luffy dog piling his boyfriend and their mutual friend with ease. Her outfit had changed from this morning, into something more casual. He sat up and pushed the pillow away, so she could sit next to him on the floor. However, she opted to sit on the couch so her legs were beside him. 

With this newfound information bouncing in Usopp’s brain, it was hard to pry his eyes off her frame. She was gorgeous, even if it was in a baggy T-shirt and jeans. Her body was hidden, and he wanted so desperately to put his hand on her back, bringing her into his clutches. He wanted to run his fingers against her skin just to see what would make her pull him closer. He wanted to see how her hair smelt today, how her skin smelt, how her mouth would feel against his. 

It was perverse and it was wrong, to have these thoughts run rampant in his mind. But they weren’t misogyny, they were built off of pure unbridled love. They were built off of innocence and purity. They were built off of his affections for her. The fact he loved her, so deeply and truly. He always had, ever since they were teenagers. He never stopped loving her, chasing her through other women to fill the void she left when she, well, left. 

Sanji watched as he stared at her, eyes wide with curiosity, “Usopp?” Her voice broke into his thoughts, being the thing that caused him to turn away for a moment. He wasn’t being very inconspicuous with his staring, in fact he was being too obvious. How could Usopp not be obvious anymore, when it felt so good to indulge and watch her exist as a god amongst men? 

“Yeah?” The man looked back at her and he saw something in her hand. It was red and white, and the moment he saw it the thoughts of his affection were replaced with confusion. He hadn’t seen her smoke the almost two weeks she was staying. In his mind, he assumed she had quit between the three years they were apart. 

“Come outside with me? I could use the company,” she motioned to the box, shaking it a bit, “Zoro’s been coming outside with me usually before bed, but he looks a little busy,” her blue eyes trailed ahead of her, where he was letting Nami and Luffy punch his body while he laid there, half asleep. It felt like home to be there, watching them fight and sitting beside someone he cared about, without having to feel bad for those feelings. 

“Is that why you get up early? To smoke?” Usopp asked her as they exited the apartment building into the middle of the street, where the crisp night air hit his cheeks and made them prickle with a red blush. She put on a jacket that was his, asking if she could borrow it because all of her’s were dirty. It was brown leather and too big to fit her anymore, loosely hanging from her frame as she lit the cigarette hanging from her bottom lip. 

“I’m surprised you didn’t know,” Sanji looked at him, waving the lighter before placing it back in her pant pocket. She pulled the cigarette from her lips and exhaled the smoke in the opposite direction from her friend, clearing her throat before she continued, “I always think you’re asleep by the time I go to bed, so Zoro comes with me out here. But then I get to your room and you’re still awake.” 

“So that’s where you got long-nose from?” He mused, placing his hands in his own jacket pocket as he slowly walked forward. 

“He did call you that once, yeah,” she smiled and pressed the cigarette to her mouth, inhaling and closing her eyes. It explained the homely scent that lingered on her skin, even if it was covered in citrus. There was something savory to it he couldn’t quite place, but it was the cigarettes. He knew she had started smoking young, it was almost like her thing back in high school. He could even picture her smoking behind the school as he sat on the ground, watching her with keen eyes. 

“You don’t mind the smell do you?” Sanji asked, turning her head to him. 

They made eye contact and he brushed some coils of his own hair from his forehead before he responded, “No. Reminds me of home.” 

“I didn’t know your parents smoked when you were younger,” she flicked a bit of the ash onto the pavement. With the subtle glow of the cigarette then the dim street lamps, she looked like a dream. Something only a painter could capture. Something that if he tried to get a photo of, it would never be the same. It would never have the same effect as living it would. 

Usopp shook his head, causing her brows to furrow, “You smoked when we were younger.” Sanji silently stared back at him as the small stick stuck from her bottom lip. She let it drizzle smoke from the head as she watched him in the darkness that began to surround them as the sky turned dull blue.

“I remind you … of home?” She asked quietly, a pink blush forming at the bridge of her nose and coming to the apples of her cheeks. 

“Sanji,” he breathed out, “I think you are my home.” Before Usopp could catch himself the words came slipping out, telling more of the truth than he wanted to tell. 

Her lips pursed and she pulled the cigarette from her mouth again, to cradle it between two fingers, “You’ve been acting so weird all this week. I thought I did something. You’re always so red and … sweaty,” a small but awkward smile pulled at her lips, “And you look scared, all the time. Like you’re saying the wrong thing.” 

The moment felt right. The moment was right. She was standing in dull light and he was beside her, just a mere foot and a half apart. The night was fading into darkness, the cigarette was almost up, her hair was pushed back in a messy ponytail, and, god, her lips looked beautiful in the faded shade of red he had applied hours prior. There was nothing more that he could do than stare, even though he knew he needed to respond. 

But how could he respond to her? He was being weird, and sweaty, and scared. He was all of it. No matter what he said, it would sound like a stupid lie to cover up an even more stupid lie. Because in truth, it was. It would be a cover up for something he never wanted to tell her. 

“I’m misogynistic.” 

Usopp pressed his lips together as he realized what the hell he just said. Sanji stared at him blankly, the cigarette falling from her fingers as she slowly blinked in thought.

“No- Well I was- well I thought I was! I thought I hated women, because y-you know you’re a,” he awkwardly motioned to her body then his eyes widened, “Not because that makes you a woman- you are a woman- a very pretty woman! And that makes me scared and sweaty- because I thought I hated women!” Usopp inhaled sharply before he continued, “But I don’t hate women- I don’t hate you! I thought I did- an-and I felt so bad, because then that would mean I hate you- but I don’t! I love you- I love you. Oh. My. God. I love you. I love you like- like- It hurts. It hurts so much that I love you and I’m … saying this… out… loud…” 

Sanji stared back at him as he rattled on, eyes becoming glasslike until they started spilling silent tears down her cheeks. He hadn’t even noticed, until his sentence trailed off and she saw her face glisten in the street light. He had done it. He was the one to make her cry with the beliefs he tried to keep from her. Usopp had made the woman he loved more than he could physically bear because of his idiotic words and timing, and because he couldn’t hold a secret for more than five minutes before pouring his heart out. 

He tried to fix it, “Sanji…” But his voice died in his throat when she let out a small sob, covering her mouth. 

“You… idiot,” she looked at him, brushing her fingers by her waterline to try and stop the tears that wouldn’t stop falling. All the while, a wide smile adorned her face. The smile was what made her friend tilt his head and narrow his eyes in surprise. Surely, he had upset her, I mean, she was crying! How could she be smiling at his misogynistic confession? 

“You idiot!” Sanji smacked him on the head, causing him to stumble back a bit before she grabbed the collar of his shirt and forced her eyes to bore into his own, glossy with her tears. Her expression was crumbling with something that looked akin to joy as she held him close, trying to speak but all that would come out were garbled sobs. And at that moment, all he could think about was how beautiful she looked, all messed up. Her eyeliner was slightly smudged at the corners of her eyes, although her mascara wasn’t budging. Her bottom lip was quivering as she tried to hold back a smile she never wanted to hold back. 

“Are you… upset…?” Usopp raised his hands, slowly placing them on her shoulder blades, slowly prying her away from his shirt. She shook her head quickly, to which he responded, “You’re happy?” At that she nodded vigorously, “Why?” He asked, clearly not understanding. 

“Be-e-cause,” Sanji squeaked, hiccuping before her words spilt out, “You love m-me, too.”

“Oh,” he had forgotten that in his confession of past misogyny, he also confessed his feelings a few minutes after realizing them. “Wait, too? You love me, too?” A kind of burning sensation was growing in his chest until it finally exploded, rising in his skin and melding deep into his face. He was on fire, and it was perfect. If she caused him to burn, he���d thank her and ask her to burn him again. Because he loved her, fuck, he loved her so much he couldn’t stand it. 

Sanji nodded, taking her knuckles to her eyes to wipe away the excess of makeup pooling at the bottom of her eyelid. Even with that messed up makeup and tear stained face, she looked like a painting. She looked messy and human, so beautifully human. 

Usopp placed his shaky hand over hers and brought it to his lips, pressing his mouth onto her fingers. Then her finger tips, then down the base of her fingers to her palm, down to her wrist. She hiccuped as he brought her in close and pressed his lips to her neck, pressing a delicate kiss to her skin as she held him closer. 

“I don’t think you understand,” he breathed out, pressing kisses on her face until their noses were mere millimeters apart, “I love you.” Usopp’s voice was barely above a murmur, something that he spoke only for her ears to hear. 

“I- I know, long-nose,” Sanji sniffed, “I’m home… I’m home now…” She spoke as if she was sure this wasn’t a dream, but she needed to be certain. She needed to know she’d never wake up, and this would never end. 

Slowly, he brought his lips to her’s, just to feel it for a moment. It was perfect, it was absolutely right. His lips were carved from the finest clay and made to be molded against her’s, no one else's. He was made to be her’s. Usopp was born to worship her and be there for her. No one else but Sanji. 

His home. 

[the-falling-star]

UghhhHHHHHH i did that all wrong🤡🤡i gave the career condition in love reading wuttt. Im sorry🥲🥲🥲 i guess i have to send it again. I hope you don't mind

My love life- last year, this person and i were dating and later i found he was a fboi🥲and even before that i had my crushes ignore me or insult me. Now i don't really believe in dating or just doing things for fun. Rather I'd wait for my destined partner even if it takes years💞

😭sorry againnnnn

Hello lovely 🥰

Your love life

Scorpio Venus

This is pretty common around Scorpio Venus natives they attract that kind of people.

Having this placement indicates that in a relationship you need Deep and meaningful connection with your lover you won't except the normal connection but you want to drive into your partner soul and know all of their hidden secrets, desires and dislikes.

When in love you tend to put your efforts and focus on the relationship, you're not the kind of lover who'll back up if the relationship isn't working but you'll try to fix.

It's hard for you to trust people but when you i can tell you it's going to be long term.

Capricorn desc

This only strengthen your Scorpio Venus cause you won't enter a relationship if you don't know 70% it's going to work and end up being with the person you like for a long period.

Security, maturity and respect are needed without any questions in any relationship you enter.

You are very patient but the moment you loose it it's over, this can make you have an inner fight your Scorpio Venus will want to stay but your need for a healthy relationship will not let you.

Mind VS Heart

Your desc ruler in the 12th

You appreciate it if your relationship kept private and just between you and your partner.

Probably into foreigner or you'll meet you partner in a foreign land or near water.

With Saturn being the ruler it's either they're wiser than you or older.

Don't forget to give feedback 💜

[tellthestoryofmybrokendreams]

Rollercoaster

Fandom: Avatar: the Last Airbender

Pairing: Zuko/Katara

Status: Complete

Words: 1,927

AO3 Link 

Previous Next 

Desc: Katara has her ups and downs. Sometimes they’re bumps in the road, and sometimes they’re a ride on an Omashu mail cart. Zuko learns more about her everyday as she surprises him and they grow together. But these surprises are the things he loves about her.

(Or, a story of Katara being everything Zuko could ever want or need, and an examination of just how exactly they got together.)

A/N: Hello again my loves! This is second in my new series based on my love of Zutara, my love of Bleachers, and the ways they intertwine. I explain better in the first fic, but these are in track order, not chronological order, and the whole set contains two continuities.

Now, let's get on with Zuko drinking his loving Katara juice lmao. Enjoy!

If someone were to ask Zuko to list Katara’s flaws, he supposes he could. She has a temper, she holds grudges, and she tends to make impulse decisions without realizing the consequences. She cares almost too much, especially about the people she loves, to the point where he thinks if any of Team Avatar had to die to defeat the Fire Lord she might let Ozai and Azula win. Though, really, the same could be said of him.

And it’s not like he particularly cared about or looked for her “flaws” anyway, he’s just heard Toph and Sokka complain about her. Or maybe he got annoyed once or twice at her attempts to help everyone they come across, despite the weight it puts on her shoulders.

Everyone has a flaw or two, everyone has a negative aspect to their personality. He would know, he’s got a top twenty list for himself. And he spent his childhood surrounded by people dominated by their flaws.

That doesn’t mean she’s not incredible, though. He thinks often about their own “life changing field trip”, and how powerful she was, how that trip changed how he saw her and made everything make sense. Before they left, he knew she’d had lessons with a waterbending master, and that she was teaching Aang. But whenever he imagined her, thought of their last fight, he hadn’t even imagined her full power. She’d been good, but he’d thought it surely was just because of the full moon. To see her reach inside someone and take control of the water inside them? That was the moment he recognized that she was a true master, probably one of the best water benders in the world.

That trip overall had been a lot for the two of them, the tension was thick and she went out of her way to avoid touching him. Their last meaningful interaction was weighing on them both.

Unbeknownst to the rest of the team, Katara had come to his room for a second time after he returned from Boiling Rock. She wanted to know exactly what had happened, and her brother refused to tell her. She’d perched herself on his window sill as he sighed, sat on his bed, and thought back to try to give her every detail. Spirits knew he’d want to know everything if she’d brought his mother back to him.

He hadn’t noticed at the time, but as he recounted their daring escape, tears had slowly filled her eyes. She’d curled herself into a ball slowly as she took in the information. And when she heard him describe their final fight with Azula and Ty Lee on top of the gondola, and coming so close to dying, she stood suddenly. He finished explaining how he knew if Azula was there, she’d have a war balloon before looking up, noticing her sudden movement and startling.

She took a tentative step closer to him, then hesitated, “What would you have done? If Mai hadn’t saved you I mean.”

He shrugged, “Well, I’d grab Sokka, Suki, and your father, and try to do that move Azula did. Shoot fire and use it to propel me as I jump. If I couldn’t make it, I’d throw them up, either to the rim of the volcano or so they could grab the other line and climb it.”

She considered for a moment, nodding, before freezing and narrowing her eyes slightly, “If you did that, you’d die.”

“I’d die if I didn’t do it-”

“No, the gondolas are probably built to float.”

“Well either way, it was more important for them to survive. You and Aang need Sokka, Sokka would never forgive himself if Suki died, and I refuse to let the two of you lose your second parent. Aang progressed quickly with firebending, he could have gone on and taught himself decently without me. It would be an honor to die and save some of the most important people in this fight.”

Katara almost seemed to tremble as her mouth fell open. She took a small step, then another, before practically sprinting towards him and throwing her arms around him. Shocked, he almost didn’t return the embrace. After a second she pulled away, still leaving her hands on his shoulders despite the slightly awkward distance between them, and he stared at her in confusion.

She looked conflicted, unsure of herself, as she looked him in the eye before whispering, “Th-thank you Zuko. That was good of you,” she paused, before returning to her normal tone when addressing him, “But I...I still don’t trust you. This doesn’t change that.”

He deflated a little, “I kno-”

And she suddenly shot up on her tiptoes, and pressed her lips to his. This time, it was almost instinctive. He kissed her back fiercely and went to wrap his arms around her waist.

Before he could, she was out of his reach, a look of shock and horror on her face that morphed into anger as she quickly bent the water from the glass by his bed to fall over his head. She turned on her heel and stormed out, muttering under her breath. Her words were rapid and blended together, and his head was spinning, so even his above average hearing couldn’t make sense of it.

They hadn’t discussed it, not even on their expedition, but he knows it’s the reason she was so hostile between then and when they faced Yon Rha. At the time, he was completely bewildered. He was certain she’d kissed him, but then she was so angry and disgusted, like he’d forced himself. He knew he hadn’t, and she probably would have done more than released water over his head if he had, anyway.

And then she was yelling at him about her mother when he tried to talk to her about how she was acting, and he figured out what she was thinking. Really, it was just what she’d said beneath Ba Sing Se. The Fire Nation took her mother, and when she thought of the Fire Nation she pictured him. Throw in her bizarre fury over their even more bizarre...incident, and of course she was cold and angry with him.

He knew he had to make it up to her, make everything up to her, and he figured getting closure for her mother was exactly what she needed. Whatever closure meant to her.

Their adventure to get said closure was...eventful. She proved herself a force to be reckoned with, and he silently thanked the Spirits that he’d switched sides when he did. He was certain she’d now be able to stop his heart with a flick of her wrist if she wanted to.

And when they climbed back on Appa’s back, she’d immediately curled up in a ball in the saddle. He pulled a blanket from his pack and gently laid it over her, before taking the reins and steering Appa toward Ember Island. All this time discussing her past had made him think of his own, and a safe haven it held.

“I know somewhere we can stay for now,” he called back to her, “And I’m gonna take us there and drop you off before I go get the others.”

He thought he saw her nod.

But when they touched down at his family beach house, and he explained what it was and led her to a bedroom to rest, the rain outside became a heavy storm with far too much lightning for Appa to fly safely. So he stayed the night in the house with her, waiting for the rain to let up. He’d given Katara his mother’s room, but as he stood upstairs in the hallway he knew his childhood bedroom was not where he should stay.

He made his way to his father’s old room at the end of the hall and stepped inside. This room had the most dust, despite their servants usually cleaning before a trip, since Ozai hadn’t come to the house with his family for years even before they stopped going altogether. Zuko shook out the bedding before climbing in and falling asleep quickly as his exhaustion hit him.

These circumstances usually led to dreamless sleep, but he was still chased through his subconscious by long, dark hair and beautiful blue eyes, just as he had been every night since his return from Boiling Rock. If he was truly honest with himself, she’d haunted him since he first laid eyes on her at the South Pole.

The next day, the rain was still pounding down outside. He lit a fire and they sat down together in front of it, drinking tea that had probably gone bad. They were silent, until he asked how she was doing and she sighed and turned to face him.

“I’m ok. I feel better than I have in a while. I don’t know if it was weakness or strength that I didn’t kill him, but I don’t think he deserved it anyway. He is a cowardly, empty man, and death would be too kind. I embarrassed him by beating him so easily, and by finding him too pitiful to bother killing. He will suffer with his crimes for the rest of his life, be imprisoned once we win, and die a slow death in his old age, hopefully from a painful disease. I think I did the right thing.”

He smiled, “If you feel it was right, then it was.”

She stared at him all morning, and he pretended not to notice. When he finally was able to leave and get the rest of the crew, she looked at him unabashedly, smiled, and said goodbye.

When the whole Team Avatar came back and saw that she wasn’t in the house, he and Aang went out to look for her on Appa. Finding his favorite waterbender sitting on the dock and swishing the ocean with her feet, he stood back and allowed Aang to talk with her. He wasn’t really listening, it was a private conversation, and probably a repeat of their own exchange. He did tune in when he noticed her stand up angrily.

“I didn’t forgive him. I’ll never forgive him,” she told Aang, hard and direct and letting him know he was wrong this time. But then she softened and turned to him with a smile, “But I am ready to forgive you.”

She walked toward him, and he stayed still, waiting for her next move. And she launched herself at him and threw her arms around him. He felt his inner fire expand as another drive cemented itself in his soul, “Be everything Katara needed him to be.”

And from then on, she was always by his side and he was always by hers. They were Yin and Yang, and they made each other better. Even before they told their friends, they knew they were each other’s one and only. She led him into battle and adventure alike, and he loved every bit of her. She was fun and incredible, his favorite person in the world. She continues to surprise him as she did on that first trip together, and they run free together with no plans to ever stop. Stuffy Fire Nation politics couldn’t even begin to hope to contain them. Each of her flaws only makes her more beautiful, another aspect of the woman he loves. He never knew what would come next with her, but he knew and trusted every bit of this girl with every bit of him.

[silenthillmutual]

Siskin: You must be thinking that you can’t leave this place now. But don’t let it get to you. Daniil: ...Do you have a gun in this house, I wonder? With three bullets?

Morphine note: Relieves fear and pain, leaving you drowsy and numb. Wish I could take some and sleep, but that’s not an option right now.

Name on Paper desc: I am Daniil Dankovsky, a Bachelor of Medicine and fighter of death. I have one last chance to figure out the truth.*

Daniil: [...] You waste your final move sucking the poison from the wound, when you could have strangled the snake once and for all.* Nocturnal Artemy: So this is it? There, ahead of you... lies death. Nocturnal Daniil: Yes. Nocturnal Artemy: But why do you have to go then? Nocturnal Daniil [not pictured]: Because I must. Simple as that.

Pathologic 2: The Inquisitor will take the one who bends reality. They’ll twist them, break them. The person responsible won’t even understand how they decided to put a bullet in their own head. That’s their method. Classic: I’ve made up my mind. If I am not to go back victorious, then I’d rather blow my brains out with this very revolver.[...] Pathologic 2: I think... all these plague days have been leading to me doing something like this. I’ve been accused of all sorts of crimes - but I was innocent. There were rumors that I was a looter, that I walked around with a revolver killing people. I guess... I had to prove them right.

Daniil + his shitty mental health

* to the Town, writing your name down on this scrap paper is getting rid of your name, your face, your identity. the implication here is that Daniil has done this to himself.

* i decided to include this one on here, because Daniil is symbolized by snakes - and, after all, if you pick the ending where you “strangle the snake” by preserving the polyhedron, it results in Daniil committing mass suicide with the others by walking into the steppe to die [Nocturnal Ending]

way back on my old twitter, i wrote a thread about the reason why i related to Daniil being because it’s pretty obvious to me that he has depression. i don’t believe for a second you’re supposed to read him as neurotypical, the idea is just absurd to me. 

until i was about 21 or 22, i had this belief that i was smarter than everyone else and that this made me better than other people. i can’t quite put the word “genuinely” in front of those words, because the belief wasn’t especially genuine. it was a way to prop myself up and keep some semblance of fake self-esteem going. this means that i was difficult to work with, aggravating, and had a hard time making & keeping friends. i still do. 

the thing, is this: even when i wasn’t being insufferable, people still didn’t like me. they didn’t like me when i was trying to be nice and normal or at the very least, not aloof. it didn’t matter, one way or the other, so why not blanket myself in this false confidence? at least then they’d have a reason to dislike me.

so i threw myself into studying. did this all through middle school, high school, and at least the start of college. that’s just what you do when you have no friends. it didn’t help that my mother’s side of the family is very like that - obsessed with academics, with being smart. and of course since i cut off all contact with my mother, i don’t really hear from them anymore. i was made to feel, growing up, that i wasn’t really a part of my family. the only way i ever felt that link was by being insufferable about my “intelligence”.

but a lot of that was also masking severe depression. i spent a large part of my life just wondering when i was going to give in and kill myself, like any little inconvenience made me feel that way. the only thing keeping me going was taking so many classes i didn’t have time to kill myself, or thinking that “if i succeed i’ll get out if it but if i don’t i’ll fail everything”. to this day the only compliments i’m used to receiving are based on how smart others perceive me as being. like, “if i’m not the smart one, who am i? why do i exist?”

or as it’s asked in Marble Nest, “Who are you without [your resolve]? Who would need you?” 

and the answer is nobody. self-importance is the only thing he has left. by the time you reach the end of the game, the only identity he has left and the only thing he knows for certain is that he’s intelligent, and that doesn’t do him any good. the only thing keeping him going in Marble Nest is the fact that he hasn’t figured things out yet, that it’s a puzzle with one piece missing, and if he gives up on this last shred of identity - that’s suicide. he disappears.

people in both classic and marble nest comment to Daniil that it doesn’t look like he’s doing well. it doesn’t help that there’s a rumor that he’s dead. even Artemy in the main game of Pathologic 2 can comment to Daniil that he looks awful and needs to sleep, but both Daniil and Rubin are running themselves into the ground. you do that kind of thing, of course, when you’re busy; but sometimes, you do it because the only other option is being alone with yourself, and that’s just unbearable. and i think for Daniil that it’s a little bit of both, since he’s in way over his head here and any time that he has a break from running other peoples’ errands, he comments about his failures: the vaccine is a bust. he can’t figure out who the carrier is. the Pest keeps changing, so none of his ideas or methods are panning out. the people in power are refusing to help him in any meaningful way. people are breaking quarantine. the guidelines he was given for defeating the plague (which Diurnal ending makes explicit his entire life depends upon) are impossible and getting close to mutually exclusive. what he’s managed to accomplish he’s been told is inadequate and disappointing. everyone is volatile, hostile, lying, misdirecting, or gaslighting him. the only person he really has to talk to is Artemy - which is why he says to you that he doesn’t actually expect anything from you. he’s just sharing. even the people who supposedly invited him there (in Pathologic 2, at least) are going behind his back and telling you they don’t have faith in him. 

i think this fits neatly into his character arc. being depressed, and specifically being suicidal, give you a really weird relationship with death. you get obsessed with it. you want to die. you don’t want other people to die. and then you feel you’re close to death, close to dying, you get really scared. it feels like a great injustice, and it also feels like it can’t come soon enough. i think Daniil’s been on the brink of losing it for a while, and i also think it’s amazing he lived to be 28. 

[bisexual-horror-fan]

The Man of My Dreams - Chapter 31 - ‘A Nasty Little Habit’

Freddy Krueger X Original Female OC

Rating: Explicit. 

Length: 5.9K 

Warnings: Masturbation, edging, dirty talk, dom and sub dynamics.

--- I was 15 years old when I discovered masturbation. For around two years before that I felt hot and bothered and flustered often and didn’t know what to do about it, when I figured it out oh my God it was life changing. It took me over a month to figure out how to orgasm, and once I did, I never stopped, masturbation became the first love of my life. The intrinsically intimate act of expressing my love for myself became an escape from any negative or terrible realities of life. It might sound stupid, talking about the act of self pleasure as such a life defining and life affirming thing but it is that, for me anyway. It really helped me, I cared about myself, took care of myself, and no not just like that, in other important and meaningful ways as well. There is nothing wrong with loving oneself, and I loved myself often.

I would come at least three times a day minimum, sometimes more, often more, my teenage years throughout high school, whenever I was alone I would spend so much time getting myself off, I was obsessed. If there was a place in the house I could lie or sit or rest on you could guarantee that I came at least once on it. The bed and the couch were favorites of course, I made very good friends with the shower head as well, some adventurous experiences happened outside. It kept me to myself a lot, I did have friends of course, hobbies, don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t some hermit, locked up and masturbating the days away, I did other things. However I satisfied myself so thoroughly and often that I didn’t see the point in dating much. I didn’t want to rush into a boy’s bed when I found so much joy in my own.

College kept me busy, as did my social life and hobbies, the first time I hooked up with someone was bland and forgettable. I did realize however that I love to kiss, making out at parties was a good time, I didn’t go to parties often but when I did I would love to find someone cute, talk and laugh with them and end up straddling their lap as we made out, I would get worked up and hot and leave back to my dorm to take care of myself. I kinda got a small reputation as a tease, I didn’t really go further than making out because whenever I did give in from time to time, it wasn’t as good as what I could do to myself. Dates were infrequent, I was just always so busy with other things, my masturbation habits slowed as I got older, they didn’t stop though, peaks and valleys, a week here that I don’t do it at all and another week comes by where I cum multiple times everyday.

I had been at my job for a while, finding a career that fit my degree was wonderful, I liked the work, the office I worked in was fine, co-workers were nice, we would hang out after work sometimes. Soon I found myself settled into adult life, work and friends sometimes and home, once I was settled into my job I had much more time for hobbies. I liked sewing and reading and watching movies. Horror movies were my favorite, in addition to horror movies I would love to look up horror related content online. As you may remember it was during this time I came across the posts about him, nothing else had captivated my attention in such a fashion in what felt like forever.

Freddy Krueger.

Looking up post after post and learning about him, I still remember the first night I found that post that post that had such a profound effect on me. People would include things he said to them in their posts, a lot of the things he said were jokey and crude, an obvious sexual edge to them and I had to admit that I liked it, but this post I found was much more than that.

Some woman had started a new thread on the forum that was meant specifically for posting about him, the inquiry burned in my brain-

“Has anyone else fucked him?”

I clicked on it immediately. She wasn’t the only one who had been with him, many other women talked about it, described what they did, I remember my fingers slipping into my panties, eyes glued to the screen. I came for the first time to him that night, reading a comment from some woman about how he had her bent over a railing in the boiler room, the things he said to her, the way she described how his blades sliced through her flesh so easily, it just did it for me. Woke something up in me that I didn’t know was there, after that first night it became my mission to find every post, comment, story about this, about him, the disgusting and dirty things he did to these women. Some women did it to get him to leave them alone, spare them, it worked, how scared they sounded was exhilarating for me, and I only felt a little guilty getting off on their fear. My favorites however were the ones where the women were into it, very, very into it.

It was just porn, it was just a hot, fun fantasy, it wasn’t real after all.

It didn’t stay that way. Not with how obsessive I could be with something that I enjoyed as much as this.

Soon enough it wasn’t just that, it wasn’t just porn, it was something more than that, I pictured myself in the position of these women. I wanted to be fucked like them, cut and hurt and degraded, debased and used, I had never wanted those things before. The porn I used to consume before stumbling on this was different, I mean I wasn’t a stranger to kink necessarily, I had quite a few things I was into but not anything quite as um violent as this.

Before I knew it it had been almost two months of this, coming home after work and losing myself in this fantasy and wanting it, craving it, and then getting that idea, you know the one, I’ve mentioned it before, that bad, dumb, hot idea. Maybe my brain was melting from how often I was getting off to it but it seemed like the next logical step.

I wanted to try to meet him.

You know how that went.

It worked and I did.

And it was so much better than my imagination, I finally understood, it all clicked into place for me, this is what sex was supposed to be like. I never enjoyed it before this because I wasn’t into it, wasn’t invested, the buttons I needed pushed weren’t even being brushed against in those shamefully vanilla encounters I had throughout college. Kissing which used to be a main event seemed less than secondary, he never even kissed me until our third encounter, something that would have been impossible before, unacceptable even, was now one of the hottest experiences of my life. I would fall into bed every night, hoping to see him, and the nights I was rewarded with a visit from him were blissful, the visits increased, the playroom was a home away from home. I would give myself over and lose myself to him in any way he desired, I found myself feeling different in my life, happier, more confident overall, just better. I would write about our encounters and share them online, people loved what I wrote about, some people just assumed it was fake, just stories but the ones who knew better sent me some messages from time to time. Sharing and swapping stories, some of them curious how he was doing, he certainly had an effect on some of these women, some of them were desperate to see him again. It made me feel important that I was one of his regulars.

I loved what we did, I found myself embracing everything, the cruel words he spat at me, the orders he gave, every little mark and cut he graced my writhing body with, all of it.

And soon. Like an idiot. I fell for him.

I mean fuck how could I not?

It was around 5 months of visits when I told him. I thought I scared him off, days and days with no visit. But then he was back again. Turns out he felt similarly, he isn’t the type to say “I love you.” not seriously anyway but that is fine by me, not everything needed to be said so definitively. I didn’t need to hear him say it, really, I was content, we continued on like that, me visiting often, us getting up to what we always did.

I masturbated less and less, not only because sometimes he ordered me to wait and deny myself, dear Lord was that difficult by the way, but also because I didn’t feel the need to as much. The sex we had was so satisfying that masturbating fell to the sidelines during the time I had been with him.

Until now.

Freddy had oh so graciously gifted me a new piercing for my birthday, the best and yet simultaneously the worst gift I have ever gotten. I felt like a teenager again, discovering myself for the first time, that small curled barbell was controlling me, making me give myself over to my base desires over and over.

It was the day after my birthday. I woke up and rolled out of bed, I did my normal morning routine, a usual Thursday. It was in the shower when I was washing, my hips moved wrong, or rather right I suppose depending on how you look at it, and it rubbed against me in a way that drew a short gasp from me. The sex we had last night was so good, he truly spoiled me for my birthday and I was still sensitive from the multiple orgasms he gifted me, the small piece of polished metal through the hood of my clitoris was here to remind just how raw I was. I made a mental note that I had to be more careful when I was drying myself off.

So. Let me run you through my full Thursday.

8:30: Dressed and ready for the day, left with my bag, walked to work, realized with the height of the heels I chose, not disturbing my piercing as I walked on uneven city sidewalks was a nigh impossible feat.

8:55: Made it to work, feel the first signs of my wetness leaking into my panties, lingered in the break room, Mark was being flirty again and I flirted back, a terrible idea that did nothing to ease my condition and instead, worsened it.

9:00: Started working.

9:35: Finding a sitting position that didn’t put pressure on it was difficult.

9:50: Never mind difficult, I mean impossible.

10:20: I break. I go to the bathroom and with shaking hands I pull my skirt up and touch myself, I tell myself this will help, it will give me some relief, I can focus on the day's tasks better and I truly believe myself when I think about it. I cum quickly with how turned on and stimulated I am, leaned against the stall’s wall with a shiver and biting back his name on my tongue.

10:26: I have righted my clothes and washed my hands. I am back at my desk, hoping that the slight flush on my face goes unnoticed by Mark.

11:30: I get up to get some water and after taking two steps away from my desk I realize just how wet I was and have to fight the urge to make some kind of sound from how good it feels to move.

12:15: I break for lunch, Mark and I eat together in the break room and I find it hard to focus hard on what he is saying, difficult to retain any of it. My clit is throbbing and demanding attention.

12:30: I give in again. Back in the bathroom, in the same stall as before, one arm resting on the wall, my head leaned on my forearm, my other fingers having pushed my soaked underwear aside and rubbing myself. I come so hard my legs shake and my toes curl in my pumps. With my eyes closed like this I of course imagine I am doing this in front of him so it isn’t just for my enjoyment but his, he taunts me in my fantasy and I smile.

1:00: Cleaned up, lunch finished and back to work.

1:30: No one who has ever lived or will ever live is as wet as I am right now, I am sure of it.

2:03: I steal another orgasm, this time in the supply closet. I went in to get some sticky notes and while I was in there the thought of getting fucked in there during work hours was too much. I had a heel rested on one of the low shelves, I was at the back of the closet, watching the door, my heart pounded, the thought that if someone were to open the door at this moment they would see just what I was doing making the pleasure I stole on company time all the sweeter and dirtier. My fingers buried deep inside myself as my palm rubbed over my clit making me see stars and I had to bite the inside of my cheek this time to keep quiet.

2:06: I came frighteningly quick, but I do know that about myself, the more I do it, the shorter the time needed to hit that peak becomes. I am back at my desk, I work and tell myself no more today.

3:00: I managed to last almost a full hour. I tried! Really! I swear! And yet I failed. I went to the bathroom for its intended purpose and while I was there it just ended up happening.

3:40: Again. I did it again.

4:30: A measly half hour before the end of the work day and I couldn’t wait. I felt almost sore by this point but I just couldn’t stop myself.

5:00: Work day done, panties effectively ruined, I packed up to go home. Mark and I flirted a little as I packed up and soon I was out and walking home.

5:40: I had stopped for dinner on the way home, I had take-out with me. The second I was in the door I had it locked, heels kicked off, bags of steaming food dropped near my stocking clad feet. I still had my jacket on for fuck’s sake but my skirt came up and leaning my back against the door I did it again. Being alone in my apartment I allowed myself to moan and gasp and I breathed his name through clenched teeth and came so hard that this time my legs failed to keep me upright. I allowed myself to slide down the length of the door, my fingers didn’t stop as I did, shaking weakly and panting like a wreck.

6:00: I had my jacked stripped off and was sitting on my couch in front of the tv, eating, scrolling through my socials with one hand and I ate Chinese food with the other. I had one foot tucked under me, the other resting flat on the floor.

6:30: Dinner done I had leaned back and stretched, I made the mistake of forgetting where my foot was, as I stretched I was reminded of my little problem and made myself get up to go deal with it.

7:00: Another orgasm taken with me still in my work clothes on top of the blankets that covered my bed. I was sweating and stripped off my work clothes. I have the thought that 8 is enough, more than enough I don’t need to do it again.

7:30: Another. The shower head was right there, I had to.

8:00: Lunch made for the next day, clothes laid out, I read some of a book I have started on the couch.

8:50: I come again grinding the arm of said couch and leave a wet spot behind, even though he isn’t there to order me to clean the soft faux leather with my tongue, I do it anyway and know that he would be proud of me.

10:00: I start getting ready to retire for the evening. I like relaxing in bed for a while before actually sleeping.

10:30: Again. A-fucking-gain. What is wrong with me?

11:00: Sleep takes me, I am utterly beat from the day's events.

So to sum up, I am only on day two of having this little gift of his and I came ten times. Ten fucking times, this is what I am talking about, feeling like a teenager again, I haven’t pulled those kinds of numbers since I was seventeen for fucks sake. We had our standing date on Friday, I woke up determined to hold off, I was in my bathroom, brushing my teeth, staring down my reflection, I pulled the brush from my mouth, pointing it forward and said to myself.

“You will be good today. You will not cum. You will wait until you are with him.” I broke eye contact with myself with a sigh, brush returning to my mouth as I muttered. “Easier said than done.”

I got ready, showered, dressed, a breakfast of tea and toast eaten with me standing next to my counter, my heels next to my feet so I could slide into them easily on my way out the door. I scrolled through my phone, my mind elsewhere, wondering what he and I would do tonight, I shoved the last bite in my mouth and drained my remaining tea, pushing the thought from my head, I shouldn’t linger on that thought too long or it will make today’s task that much harder. Heels and jacket on, I grabbed my purse and headed out the door.

Work. Work today was hard. Mark didn’t make it any easier. He was talkative and friendly and distracting. Looking at Mark reminded me of him which made things worse, I looked at Mark and was reminded of the filth I had gotten up to in front of him. My clit was practically screaming for attention by lunch time, crossing my legs put pressure on it that made me want to bite my lip. I was proud of myself that I even made it to lunch, half way through the day, I could do this, I could totally do this.

Then. I got an idea. Edging doesn’t count right? Of course not, edges are edges, not orgasms.

I still had the taste of leftover chow mein from lunch on my tongue when I snuck off to the bathroom. I still had ten minutes left in my lunch break, I found myself back in the stall and I managed to edge three times in that ten minutes. I was shaking when I slipped the hem of my skirt back down over my thighs, I paused and took several deep breaths before I went back to my desk.

Well that was a bad idea.

It was much, much harder to ignore my need now, edging didn’t do anything but fan the fire between my legs. An hour and a half after lunch I went back to the bathroom and stole a few more edges, it didn’t take much to get there, I would rub quickly and soon be right there, fingers would slow but not stop. Slower and slower and slower until they finally did stop, fingertips still over my clit, pressing, not daring to rub one more tight circle for fear of cumming.

Deep breath.

Again. Quick, harsh, small circles, tugging lightly on that smooth metal, back arching and then I was there, slow, slow, slower, stop.

Repeat.

I hesitate to tell you how many times I managed to edge that Friday afternoon at work. It was too many, I will tell you that one of them was at my desk. I felt so bold, so hot, my chair pulled in as tight as possible, skirt inched up, legs hidden under my desk but if someone came over to talk to me they would see. If they stood next to me they would see the lacy tops of my stockings, the fear of getting caught spurred me on, manicured fingers teased lightly over my underwear, I was so scared of leaking onto my chair.

It felt so good.

I got a little lost in it, it wasn’t until Mark spoke up that I pulled my hand away, he asked some work related question and I jerked my head up from my computer screen to look over to him. He was still mid sentence when he glanced at me and stopped, confused look before asking. “Uh you okay Amber?”

I swallowed and forced a smile. “Yes, fine, why do you ask?”

“You look a little um flushed, are you feeling okay?” Shit. Snap out of it, get your fingers away from your cunt, no more, no more touching today.

“Yes, yes I’m fine I swear.” He didn’t look convinced, he dropped it all the same, I inched my skirt back down and we talked over the issue he was having. I didn’t touch anymore that afternoon, Mark tried to ask me out before I left, I told him I had plans tonight but maybe I would see him later this weekend. And soon I was back at home, I crossed the threshold to my apartment, heels kicked off, purse dropped near the door, I headed right for the bathroom, I felt so wet, so dirty too, I had sweat far too much from all the edging I had done at work, I started to work on freeing myself of my clothing. I stepped into the bathroom, I looked at myself in the mirror. I smiled upon seeing myself, my blouse unbuttoned and untucked from my tight skirt, the bra I had on that day on display. I paused and took my hair down, fluffing out around my shoulders, I thought about how much he would like this look, halfway between professional and slut. I turned on the shower, letting it heat up as I undressed, I took my time in the shower, I was washing my hair when I looked up and thought it over.

I would always cum so quickly from the shower head, was it possible for me to just edge from it? Could I control myself or would it be too good? I had edged so much today I knew I was so worked up, I might not be able to stop.

I was able to stop, but it was a close one, I only allowed myself one edge before backing off, rinsing my body and making myself leave the shower. I made dinner, I edged while the pasta boiled, and when the sauce cooked and when I was done eating. I made myself stop at about 7:30, if I kept going I would be too wound up to sleep, I knew it, I wouldn’t want to make him wait not when I promised I would never do that again. I watched a movie with my legs spread, drinking a glass of wine, not touching or putting any pressure on myself, the ache eased. I ended up in bed on time and fell asleep quickly in just a shirt and panties.

I opened my eyes slowly to the cold familiar feeling of the backs of his blades over my cheek, I hummed leaning into the touch, I was on my side, he was too close to me, I recognized that we were on the sunken bed in the floor of the playroom. “Hey Fred.”

“Amber” He greeted me, my hand reached up and pulled his glove closer, I kissed the back of his gloved hand and smiled. I pulled myself closer to him, arms wrapping around his neck loosely, his hands found my back and I let out a sigh, God it felt right being here, I adored these quiet moments with him, he spoke first. “How’s my pet doing?”

I smiled wider at what he said and leaned up, a kiss placed on his rough skin over his jaw before laying back down, looking up at him. “I’m good Fred.”

“Good.” He was smiling and took a pause and he asked. “Enjoying your present?”

Ah and just like that I was reminded of the wetness between my legs, the ache and how many times I had played with that gift of his over the past two days, fuck had it only been two days since I last saw him? “Very much so.”

Should I tell him just how much I was enjoying it? That it brought me back to feelings of being young and testing the waters of self exploration, it was different than back then obviously, I already knew my body so well this time around but now with this little addition, fuck how to even describe the change it brought on? Before I could even properly think about how to tell him he said. “You’re very wet right now.”

My heart thumped, the brief thought wondering how he knew and he continued. “I can tell. I can smell you.” Fuck was it that obvious? It must be, he pulled me closer, he was nuzzling into my hair, holding me so sweetly as he spoke. “I knew it’d be perfect for you.”

He rolled onto his back, pulling me with him as he went so I was now on top of him, he adjusted me so I was sitting up, straddling his hips, he was already hard. He ground up and my breath caught in my throat from the friction, he gripped my wrists and pulled hard, my arms now straight at my sides, locking me even closer to him, making me unable to move as he moved again, grinding into me and I let out a moan. “That sensitive huh?”

I should be honest and tell him, I took a deep breath and said. “I uh-I may have edged today.”

“Oh?” He seemed to like that, another grind and I moaned softly before saying.

“Yeah I couldn’t help it. Feels so good.” He chuckled, his head fell back onto the bed below and he arched his hips, grip still tight on my wrists and I met him this time, moving my hips as well to get that sweet friction. “Awe, are you telling me that you touched yourself at work?”

I bit my lip and I nodded, he had to feel me by now, had to feel how wet I was, I knew I was leaking through my panties. “So bad, poor little pet just had to touch didn’t she? Had to listen to her greedy little cunt.”

Fuck when he spoke like this to me it was hard to think, I just wanted to feel, just wanted to touch and moan and satisfy that ache. He let go of my wrists, his gloved hand gripped the bottom of my shirt and pushed it up, he gestured with a nod of his head and I took over, I held the hem tight in one fist, shirt held up exposing myself to him. He pushed my panties to the side and looked me over as he said. “Fuck they do look good on you.”

Hands started on my hips but they didn’t linger long, sliding up my sides, thumbs found my nipples and he teased the jewelry there, admiring for a moment. Even when the pressure was light there was an edge to it, his skin itself is so rough, he must have thought that he had lingered and admired for long enough because he started to pinch and pull and my back arched.

“I want to ask if you thought about me while you did it-” Another hard pull that made me whine and he finished the thought. “-But we both know that you did.”

Right again Freddy, as always.

“There is one little thing I am curious about Amber.” His non-gloved hand slid down my front, I was very aware of his destination, he said. “Why just edges? It must have felt so good, would have been so easy to go over, why didn’t you?”

God damn it, we have done so much, so why is it still so hard when he makes me say these things? And why did I love that too? The struggle of trying to get the words out, the hot flush of embarrassment, the man has been in every hole of mine and hell as of this week made a new one in me himself and yet he could still make me trip over my words like some silly school girl. “I-I wanted to wait for you. I...I uhm came a lot on Thursday, wanted to hold off today.”

Interest was certainly piqued, his hand had finally slid down far enough, thumb rubbed over my clit, rolling that polished metal as he went and I tensed with the feeling. “How much is a lot?”

I let out a soft moan as he rubbed, the hand that wasn’t currently holding my shirt up came to rest on top of his glove, he still had my nipple caught between two of his fingers. “Like, ohh, like ten?” I moaned it out like a question, unsure of his reaction, would he like that I did it that much or would it result in a punishment? Hard to say, depends on my behavior, which I must admit as of late has been very good, but it also depends on his mood, thankfully his mood seemed good tonight.

“Ten? No way those were all at home. Cumming at work Amber. What would your co-workers say? Your boss? What would Mark think?”

What would they say? The dirty talk was getting to me, his touches weren’t helping matters. What would they think of prim and proper, professional little Amber as she rubbed her clit practically raw, coming over and over. I liked having this dark and dirty little secret, this nasty little habit of mine, I liked it being just that though, a secret. The idea of being outed was an exciting fantasy but it should be kept that, a fantasy, shouldn’t it? “I love when you pretend that you are so much more than just a whore.”

“Yeah Fred?” I rolled my hips to meet his touch and his fingers pinched the bottom of that curved barbell and he tugged on it making me curse. “Yeah Amber. I know you try to act like you don’t want that. Don’t want everyone to know but your body tells me otherwise.”

“What?” Another tug, harder this time, I am breathless for a moment, pulled nearer to an edge I was unaware that I was approaching until now.

“I see the look in your eyes, feel your clit pulse under my touch, you drip more, heart beats faster, whenever I talk about outing you as a horny little bitch.” He is so fucking observant, I am still unsure if he can see right into my mind but when he can read every subtle sign of my body I don’t think reading my mind is needed.

“You know me so well Fred.” It comes out breathy but not as choked as I was expecting, considering how good he was making me feel, how close he had dragged me to the edge already. “Better than anyone.”

He had been watching me so hungrily this whole time, taking in every labored breath and twitch from me, he spoke so low and deep. My hips shifted, reminding me just how hard he was, reminding me just how badly I needed him inside me already. He must have picked up on this or he wanted it just as badly, he moved his hands off of me, a flick of those blades and my hips rose up, the strong invisible vice grip that had become a staple in our playtime holding me in place. He freed himself from his pants and I felt the head of his cock brush over my folds, I would have shivered if it wasn’t impossible in the strong grip he held me in. Hand gripping the base of his cock, lining up just right he looked up at me, smirking he asked. “Ready?”

And before I even had a chance to respond that hard to define invisible something released and I was impaled on his length all at once making me moan. He let out a groan alongside me and I rested for a moment with him fully seated inside of me. I went to raise my hips up but that certain something was back all too soon. I looked down to him and he had this dark look in his eye, he had an idea, oh tell me Fred, please tell me. God I was so weak for him, I would do anything for him. “You love to touch yourself so much Amber. Don’t you?”

Hands on my hips, thumbs rubbing circles over my hips bones, fuck I wanted to move, to grind, to do something already. “Ye-yes Fred. I love it.”

“Mmm, must feel so good. I want to see you do it.”

“Now?”

“Now.” That tone that sent a pulse of heat through me and made me clench around his cock, I didn’t just want to listen, I HAD to listen. One hand rested on top of his glove, my other hand dipping down, two fingers dragged up over my hood, carefully, piercing between my fingers, tugging gently. I wanted to look away but I knew better than that, my eyes stayed locked on his, my lips parted as I breathed out his name. I personally didn’t include penetration in my masturbation much, nothing more than my fingers anyway, choosing instead to revel and love the sensations of feeling oh so full while my clit was played with for the times I was with him. I found my groove easily, stroking and playing, teasing and tugging on that curved metal, clenching on him. His hands didn’t linger on my hips, my one hand that still held my shirt was shaking, hard, but I still had my shirt pulled out of the way for him, he chose to go back to teasing my nipples as I played with myself. I was moaning his name, I wasn’t going to be able to hold out long, all the edging today was doing me in.

“Don’t tell me you’re close already? You’ve barely gotten started.”

“I-I cah-n’t help it, Fred, it’s too-fuck-too good!” A hard squeeze of my nipples and I gasped, right there now, and he laughed. “Well come on then, do it Princess, come all over my cock.”

I didn’t need to be told twice, a few more rolls of my fingers and I was cumming, slick wet heat tightened around him, strained whines and moans pulled deep from my throat. My eyes were shut tight, back arched, chest pushed into his hands and before I had even finished coming he started to move, I was pulled up and back down. Eyes open once more and on him and he had that damn smirk painted over his mouth as he said.

“Do you think we can beat ten tonight?” “We can try.”

[aka-indulgence]

Moonlit Curtains

Waiting for sleep to take over me and trying to relax ;v; oh and guess who I love? That's right it's Sans but most usually UF!Sans and also in a domestic scenario because I am always weak for that-

Desc: You have a talk after midnight with UF!Sans in bed while you attempt to sleep.

You couldn't sleep. Again.

What a surprise.

Sans shifted beside you, groaning, his voice affected by drowsiness, lethargic. "mmm... sweetheart... ain't asleep yet?" He sounded, wiping his sockets a little, turning in bed so he could spoon you, with you facing away from him, staring blankly to the darkened wall.

"I thought you were already asleep, Sans." You shifted comfortably into him, rubbing your back against the warm red long-sleeved shirt he wore, his face nuzzling into your hair. "i mean," his voice was muffled by your hair, "ya were shifting an' shuffling around, movin' the covers, babe. ain't that easy ta miss." He told you, simple.

You blinked at him. "Oh, Sans," you sighed, twisting your neck a bit so you could face him. "I'm sorry for keeping you up..."

"mmmnah." He drawled lazily, catching you off guard with a quick kiss to your lips, prezzing his teeth onto you before moving back just as quickly as he had come. "don't got nothin' ta do tomorrow. 'sides... ya know how i feel about leaving someone behind, 'specially if it's my dear sweetest." He made a silly smile, sockets opening lazily, the red lights radiating so much warmth, a-and love, you... you couldn't hold them for too long, turning away from him, the nighttime darkness thankfully covering your red tinted cheeks.

"When did you get so sweet and sappy?" You teased, trying to stop your smile from growing on your face, as if it were the first time you started crushing on the flirty, hot handsome skeleton.

"eh. since i met you?" He shrugged, his sockets fluttering close again as he shuffled his way down to your back, taking long, lazy breaths on the back of your shirt, his warm breath spreading through your back like bleeding paint- making you shiver involuntary. He didn't miss that, and he made a breathy chuckle.

"ya like that, don't ya?" He purred, voice reverberating straight through your back to your chest, a new flush on your face.

You quickly spun around much to his surprise- pushing him back on the ribs. "Oh- are you trying to make me sleep or are you trying to make me- well- wake up?!" You asked, red faced and steaming off the cheeks, making such a cute little scowl to him, not so seriously hitting him.

"aww. don't be shy now." He caught your hands, much to your chagrin. "ya know that just riles me up, dearest..." he let his teeth graze your cheek, chuckling, feeling the heat come off of you...

...

"N-no!" You squeaked, pulling your face away from him, what with your wrists still prisoners to his hands, with him finally breaking out into a (not so teasing) laugh. "aw c'mon sweetie, yer breaking all my dreams here." He put your wrists in one hand, if only to wipe a 'tear' out of his sockets. "ya don't gotta be so cruel!"

"I-I'm being cruel?!" You squawked, actively trying to fight your way out of his grip, which... which totally isn't a thing you're into, you weren't going to immediately melt and turn into goop from that, who, you? No! "You're the one doing the- the this," you fumed, gesturing to your your wrists in his large hand, "A-and doing the... sexy voice... thing...." your voice trailed off, mouth wavering at your own words. Shit, that wasn't the right thing to say to the smug skeleton whobhad every right to be smug on what he could do to you with such simple actions.

"... sexy voice?" He asked, purposefuly using said voice. "oh doll- ya flatter me so." He brought your hands to his mouth... where slowly, painstakingly softly, started to kiss them intimately.

You went silent.

...

Before you quickly tried to yank them away, face hot and close to crying from all that he's done to you. "Ohmygodsansthisistoomuchfor3AMi'mgonnadie." You spluttered out, feeling like you could do just that.

Sans smirked before he finally let you go, laughing raucously, apparently very proud of himself. "heheheh- sweetheart, i swear yer the most adorable... thing i've ever had the fortune ta stumble upon."

You've brought our hands to your face, makig high-pitched nothings at hum, trying to rub the flusteredness out of you. Damn him damn him damn him! "Ugh.... Sans... I swear I'm going to die faster because of all that time you made my heart race." You dragged them down your face, still squishing your own cheek.

"ya know it won't actually kill ya..." Sans added, a tint of concern in his voice- which you actually found hilarious.

"Well you're killing me of- well- ssss...." sexiness, you were going to say, but you're not going to keep going through this cycle to sunrise. "... swellness," you settled on, before you tilted your head at yourself. Wait... what-

"ya gonna tell me i'm sexy again?" He winked, his hand now supporting his cheekbone.

"I- ughh..." you deflated, covering your face again, before Sans made a tired chuckle. "all rigt all right dollface, i'll stop tormenting ya... fer now..."

He chuckled again when you made a tiny punch to his forearm, rubbing it a bit. "at least i entertained ya, eh?"

His phalanges slowly wrapped around your wrists, gentle and careful this time, pulling them from your face.

"..." the both of you just stared into each other, before you spoke again. ".... thanks for marrying me Sans." You smiled at him.

You saw his sockets widen and his eyelights dilate, his smile shrinking and through the moonlight passig through the curtains, you could see red tinting his cheeks- before he blinked, looking away with a meek smile on him. "ya know the pleasure's all mine, sweetheart..." he started rubbing the back of your hands.

He pulled you closer, hand around your back while a hand cupped your head, giving you a kiss on the lips, slow and meaningful... pulling away and adding another kiss to your forehead.

"love ya."

"I love you."

[incandescent-eden]

Effervescence

Desc: Sarah finds herself out of her element while attending a party with Evangeline, alcohol, old acquaintances, and stuffy theatre members.

TW/CW: alcohol, rudeness and bullying

Word Count: 2699

Effervescence.

Sarah had never been good at school. She had never been terrible, didn’t cause trouble, but was average, never liked doing math workbooks and vocabulary quizzes. One word, though, she could remember from her school days: effervescence. The state of being bubbly, either physically or in terms of personality.

Like Evangeline now.

Evangeline was stunning in her dusty pink dress with the pink tulle layers that reminded Sarah of a hydrangea, her dark hair spilling over her gossamer-covered shoulder, brushing against her long neck. A gold ribbon glinted against her dark brown locks - in a normal woman’s hair, a cheap ornament, but in Evangeline’s, a crown meant for a queen. Her lips, in their strangely pouting smile, were blazing red as always. She held her head high as she chatted with acquaintances, almost floating above the crowd as she walked.

Sarah watched as she talked and laughed with some of her friends from the theatre group, as well as some strangers. She threw her head back and laughed, her white teeth stark against her smooth, dark skin and red lips. Her cheeks were slightly flushed from the glittering champagne she held in a tall glass in her hand, a dangling bracelet made of seashells and dried macaroni on her slender wrist knocking against the stem of the champagne flute as she laughed.

So Sarah smiled, too, not because Theodore de Munch had said anything particularly funny, but because Evangeline had laughed with such mirth, and it was cute, really, the way she kept tucking her hair behind her ear to show off the dangly earrings.

Earrings, Sarah thought with pride, subconsciously standing a little taller, that Sarah had bought for her. Earrings that Evangeline loved.

Although she had not much to drink, Sarah still felt like the world was spinning, the faces blurring a little too much as she moved past, the music a little too loud. It wasn’t a bad feeling, per se, but it was definitely getting hot wearing a tuxedo jacket, even with her sleeves rolled up. The lights glowed in little orbs around the room, as if the party took place inside a glass of champagne, and the bubbles within glowed and floated about; everything was distorted, curved at the edges, blurry as if viewed through a glass and again through liquid.

But then she’d see Evangeline smile, and everything would focus once more. She didn’t expect to hear her name called. Sarah blinked.

“Sorry, what did I miss?” she asked. To her chagrin, the others in the circle started laughing.

“We were just wondering who this dormouse was that Angie brought in was,” tittered one of the actresses. Jennifer, she thought. Her hair was curled, blond, frizzing at the edges. Standing next to Evangeline, she looked luck a duck next to a swan, an acorn next to a hydrangea. She called Evangeline ‘Angie.’ Sarah smiled, watching the bubbles in her champagne as she rubbed her short hair with her free hand. It really was too hot here.

“Oh, didn’t I tell you?” Evangeline said. “This is Sarah!”

“A friend of yours, Angie?”

Evangeline shook her head.  “Sarah’s my best friend.” She smiled widely at Sarah.

Sarah smiled back, although it felt wrong. Too many eyes on them, Jennifer’s especially, gleaming and probing. She ducked her head, looking in her champagne glass instead. There was her face, yellow and distorted.

Perhaps that was also what she looked like within Jennifer’s eyes, perhaps that was why she stared so intently - to figure out why Sarah looked so out of place.

“You haven’t known her very long,” Jennifer remarked. Her voice lifted and twisted, and she laughed, but there was malice creeping underneath, like a moonlit forest path, brightly lit but unnerving nonetheless.

Evangeline brushed her hair over her shoulder, revealing the smooth curve between her neck and her shoulder. “And yet, she is the person who I feel I know best.” She gave Jennifer a tight smile. “And of course, my girlfriend.”

She took Sarah’s hand, their fingers interlocked. Her hand was warm in Sarah’s, the seashells on her bracelet cool.

“And what is that hideous bracelet?” Jennifer said, sipping her champagne while eyeing Evangeline’s wrist. Her wrist, her plump finger pads against Sarah’s hand, her smooth palm. Jennifer’s gaze burned Sarah’s hand, mingling with the tingling from Evangeline’s soft grip.

“Oh, darling, I wouldn’t say that was the only hideous thing,” Theodore added with a chuckle, eyeing Evangeline’s dress.

Sarah clutched Evangeline’s hand. She wasn’t a confrontational person, really. Truly! Damned if she didn’t want to throw the champagne glass in Theodore’s face and then scream at Jennifer, though.

Evangeline squeezed Sarah’s hand back before letting go. She slipped the macaroni and seashell bracelet up and down her wrist with a demure smile that would have made the Mona Lisa sick with envy. “Oliver made this for me as a friendship charm,” she said. “I don’t think it’s ugly at all. In fact, how can something made with so much love be ugly?” She shook her head, her loose curls falling over her bare shoulders.

There was a split second where her long, dark lashes flashed gold in the light of a random camera flash somewhere in the party when she turned her head. Sarah’s heart jumped. Would that she could keep this image forever perfectly framed in her mind, this moment where Evangeline glowed! To the unobservant eye, perhaps, she was merely an odd woman in a dusty pink tulle mess with a tangled string of dry pasta and shells and glue on her wrist. Sarah knew better.

Perhaps it was the champagne, distorting her vision, or perhaps her glasses were smudged. What else could explain the way Evangeline blurred at the edges when she smiled, her cheeks glowing gently even when not under direct light?

“Oliver the kid from Velveteen Rabbit?” Jennifer asked, eyebrow arched. She couldn’t conceal the small smirk on her face even as she lifted her champagne glass to her lips and took a long sip. Sarah clenched her fist, but Evangeline patted her shoulder gently.

“Oliver, the kid who recites lines masterfully and also likes to make macaroni bracelets and design superheroes in his free time after school,” Evangeline corrected her. “He’s a bright young man, you know. Some of us could stand to learn a thing or two,” she said with a meaningful glance from Jennifer to Theodore and back to Jennifer.

“Well, I wouldn’t know about what little brats like to do, Angie,” said Jennifer, laughing. “But I should think you didn’t want children. You’re, well, you, after all.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?” Evangeline asked, lifting her chin so she stared down at Jennifer, her neck held so high a ballerina would be put to shame.

“Oh, I just mean, you never were the matronly type when we had our little fling,” Jennifer shrugged, sipping her champagne with a bored expression. “Don’t see why you’ve started now,” she said. Her eyes darted  toward Sarah before returning to Evangeline.

Sarah shivered, although her face was hot. “I… I think, actually, Evangeline would be a great mother,” she said, staring at the bubbles in her glass. What was she saying? She had only drank a few sips, surely she could not be drunk? “I don’t know about when you had your… affair, but if you think that way, I’m sure you didn’t know Evangeline very well at all,” she continued, the words bubbling up to the surface and popping out of her mouth with more speed and force than could be stopped.

Evangeline looked at Sarah, red lips parted slightly to reveal white teeth. Proud surprise sparkled in her eyes. She smiled widely, beaming, really, and had just opened her mouth to speak when she was interrupted.

“The dormouse squeaks!” Theodore laughed raucously. “Very large for a dormouse, aren’t you?” he winked, eyeing Sarah’s wide girth.

Sarah’s face grew hotter by the minute. Perhaps they will think I’m drunk, she prayed. She shouldn’t have been so embarrassed. Not by the likes of Theodore with his reedy voice and upturned nose, nor by people like Jennifer, with her narrowed eyes and condescending smirks. And yet, next to statuesque, glowing, seraphic Evangeline, how could she feel like anything but a lump or a mouse, as Theodore put it?

She turned to look at Evangeline, startled to see how quickly her smile had disappeared, how dark her eyes flashed, how deep her snarling grimace was.

“We’re leaving, love,” Evangeline said abruptly, grabbing Sarah’s wrist. Her fingers were cold, but there was rage in the way she shook.

“So soon, Angie?” Jennifer said. “Stay for cocktails, at least! We so rarely get to see each other.”

Evangeline had already turned her back to them as she pulled Sarah behind her, but she snapped her head back just long enough to spit, “Yes, now, Jennifer. In fact, I do believe the year long headache you gave me the last we spent our time together has returned. I can’t say it’s a pity, really, but I wouldn’t want to grow snappy in your presence for the sake of upholding cordiality, so if you’ll excuse me, my current girlfriend and I have other places to be.”

And with that, she spun back on her heel and marched, her long legs a blur beneath her cloud of pink tulle.

It was cool outside on the street. Sarah watched the sky, inky and void. “I’m… Oh god, I’m so sorry, Evangeline,” she said at last, shoving her icy fingers in the pockets of her trousers. “I didn’t mean to cause trouble between you and your friends.”

Evangeline sighed, rubbing her bare arms. “Darling, what are you apologizing for? I hardly consider Jennifer and Theodore friends.” She shook her head, tongue sticking out, as if to clear her mouth of a bad taste. She looked at Sarah. Smiled.

She appeared softer out here in the darkness, with only the club’s neon sign illuminated behind her. Her right cheek was painted bright pink by the light. Sarah’s heart pounded, as if making a mad sprint the four feet from her chest to Evangeline’s arms.

“Still. I didn’t mean to cause trouble,” Sarah shrugged, smiling bashfully. She took her suit jacket off, hung it around Evangeline’s shaking shoulders.

Evangeline smiled gratefully, pulling the jacket closed around herself. “I meant what I said, you know. Jennifer always did give me a headache.”

“She seems... “

Evangeline laughed. It was a barking laugh. Hardly ladylike, but it was Sarah’s favorite laugh: real and bold and open. Maybe it wasn’t the bubbly persona its owner displayed, but it was rich in personality and fearlessness, just like Evangeline. “You don’t have to be polite, love, she’s a real witch, that Jennifer.” She looked at Sarah, and her expression softened.

“I’m sorry for losing my temper in there. It’s just…” she sighed, “The way they talked about Oliver was bad enough. But I couldn’t stand the way they called you dormouse, making fun of you.” She furrowed her brow, stamping her heeled foot on the dirty pavement in frustration. “You know, as if there was something wrong with being quiet or shy in a situation where everyone is making an utter fool of themselves! Or that… that you were somehow diminishing my status in any way!” She muttered some choice words that Sarah would never have repeated in front of Oliver.

Sarah laughed. “I didn’t mind! I mean, not too much, at least,” she said quietly, placing a hand on Evangeline’s shoulder.

Evangeline shook her head. “You are the one who makes me better than I could ever be on my own,” she promised, taking Sarah’s hand on her shoulder and squeezing it gently.

Sarah beamed, sliding her glasses back up her nose. Remembering Jennifer’s words, though, she frowned.

“What is it?” Evangeline asked, concerned.

“It’s nothing!” Sarah said quickly, but Evangeline persisted.

“Tell me.”

Sarah shrugged, self consciously rubbing the close cropped hair on the side of her head. “Jennifer and Theodore called you ‘Angie,’” she said.

“And you were wondering if maybe I preferred that and hadn’t told you?”

Sarah nodded, embarrassed. “I mean, I know it’s stupid, but I just wondered if maybe I had been wrong, and you hadn’t told me, and I didn’t want you to be unhappy, and…”

Evangeline took Sarah’s hand off her shoulder. Kissed it. “I always hated being called ‘Angie,’” she admitted.

“Really?”

She nodded. “‘Angie,’” she said with disgust. “It’s like they couldn’t say my name. Or like they thought it was too big, too grand, too much, and they wanted to contain it. ‘Angie’ is a fine name, of course,” she added, looking around in case any Angie’s were walking by. There was no one out in the night except the two of them and a bag of garbage on the sidewalk next to them.

“Besides,” she continued, that small smile that Sarah loved best returning to her face, “I like the way you say my name. You always pronounce every single syllable. Eeee-VAN-jeh-leen,” she said, mimicking Sarah. “A lot of people say it so rushed, like ‘eh-VAN-juh-lin,’ but not you.” She grinned, kissing Sarah’s hand again. “You make it sound so pretty.”

That’s because you’re so pretty! Sarah wanted to scream. Instead, she blushed. Stammered. “Well… uh… you know…” God damn it, Sarah, she internally screamed. Get it together!

Evangeline laughed. “Shall we go home then, sweet Sarah? I think I’ve had enough of bubbly and small talk tonight,” she said, rolling her eyes.

“One more thing?” Sarah asked. Her voice sounded small even to her in the darkness and uncharacteristic quiet of the city. She could still hear the dance music coming from inside the club, piano and trumpet blaring and laughing.

“Anything,” Evangeline promised. “Although… I rather like wearing your jacket, you may not get it back,” she teased.

“You called me your girlfriend,” Sarah said in awe. She could barely say the word ‘girlfriend.’ “Can you say it again?”

Confused, Evangeline replied, “Yes, of course, my lovely girlfriend.” She smiled uncertainly. “Why, though?”

“I just like the way you say it,” Sarah said softly. Shyly, she added, “And I wanted to make sure I heard you right.”

Evangeline laughed her barking, roaring laugh again. Sarah swore she could see little bubbles erupting from her, golden and sweet and celebratory. “Darling, we live together! I call you all kinds of pet names I would only ever call a sweetheart or a cat! I asked you to be my date to this cast party tonight!” She laughed and laughed, until even Sarah could not help but chuckle.

It was strange, really. If anyone else had done so, Sarah would have hidden away. Run away and never shown her face maybe. But when Evangeline laughed, Sarah thought she might turn to helium, her insides filled with joy, and float away carried by the sounds of an angel’s voice.

Evangeline wiped a tear from her eye. Her finger came away black from smudged mascara. “Yes,” she finally said. “I did mean it, love.” She thought about it, tapping her lower lip. The bracelet Oliver made her slid down her arm, disappearing into Sarah’s sleeve. “I meant that, too. Love. I love you, my girlfriend,” she said with the biggest, brightest smile that should the sun come up right at that moment and turn night into day, Sarah could not have seen it behind Evangeline’s beaming face.

She put her arm around Sarah’s shoulder, pulling her into a side hug, embracing her, then planted a kiss on Sarah’s hair. “You make me feel so… so intoxicated sometimes,” she murmured as she held Sarah close.

If only you knew, Sarah thought as they walked slowly down the street. “Effervescence,” she said aloud, albeit quietly.

“What was that, dear?”

“Nothing,” said Sarah. It was a bit chilly without her jacket, but her face was warm, and Evangeline’s arm around her left her entire left side tingling like she was made of bubbles.

Effervescence, she thought. The state of being bubbly, either physically or in terms of personality.

Effervescence. The way she felt whenever she was with Evangeline.

[fallingforspidey]

Im Way to Good at Goodbye

Desc: Tom and YN have been distant because YN is broken and she needs to heal. Will she leave tom and heal or will she stay? 

(yn)

The night was now vanishing into day. I was laying in our bed. My eyes tranfixed on the rising sun. Tom and I had been in a relationship. When I said the word had I mean the relationship was ACTUALLY good.

Lately, I have been floating off on to others. A piece of my heart will always belong to him, but it wasn’t yearning for him like it did when we were younger. My alarm went off. Tom groaned as I shut it off getting up. My eyes droping with dark bags underneath. I pulled my hair back into a ponytail eyes trained on sleeping Tom. I didn’t want to hurt him, but I had to go. I couldn’t keep pretending I was in love with him. I love him.

I just don’t feel the same way. It was nice when we were young it was better when we were young. I was so used to these things. Saying goodbye. Everyone in my life either left or I walked away. Tom was the only person who I didn’t walk away. Neither were his friends. We all were one big group.

The bad part is even his fans saw that I wasn’t the same cheery y/n. The worst part was his mum knew. She knew my feelings weren’t the same. It destroyed her. I needed her help. I want to feel the love again. I miss the meaningful kisses rather than the meaningless. I changed my pj shorts and top for a shirt and some leggings. Tom was watching me as I changed in the early hours, “Where are you going y/n?” He whispered, “Im going to out really quick. I will bring back breakfast.” I said kneeling down to his face, “Please don’t go. I can see it too ya know. Please don’t” He croaked. My heart sank.

I never got like this. I never felt like this before. I was breaking myself more than I was hurting him, “I promise Im not Im just gonna run a quick errand.” I said pecking his cheek. He gave me a weak smile as I turned and walked away.

My heart still sitting at the pit of my stomach. I sent a text to Nikki knowing she always got up early.

Nikki can we talk? I really gotta get something off my chest..

Of course you can y/n. The door is open I’m in the back.

The walk was short, but today it was like walking through treading water. Every step so heavy as I walked to the Holland house. The red door seen from a short distance became more and more vibrant.

I gulped before opening the door carefully. I knew the boys were still sleep. I walked to the sliding doors watching Nikki drink her morning, “Good Morning” I said softly, “Good Morning. I know exactly what you need.” She said patting her lap, “Come sit.” I walked to her open arms. I sat on her lap as she held my legs with one and supported my back with the other. I was hesitant, but that’s when I felt it. All my emotions that I never expressed flowed through tears. Tears I never cried.

She rocked back and forth whispering words to me. My body was shaking and I was sobbing. My heart hurt so bad. Was it because I gonna say goodbye or because I was just hurt?

Hurt. I had been hurt through the years that I never let myself heal. Both my parents died when I was young my siblings don’t really talk to me, except my youngest sister. She is 15.

“Mum I- yn?” A voice said. I looked up slowly to meet Tom’s concerned eyes. He rushed to my side, “Whats wrong baby? Tell me.” He said quickly. As I started to speak my sobs only got louder. Tom prided me from Nikkis arms holding me in his own. My face resting in his chest as I cried more and more. “Its okay baby. Im here. Im right here.” Was the last thing I heard before just shutting it all out and crying some more.

As most of my emotions had been let out and I was calming down, I heard how fast Tom’s heart was going. Like it was gonna burst out of his chest. I wiped my face a bit and faced Tom. He looked down with these caring eyes I had only seen once or twice.

“Come on. Lets go get you cleaned up.” He said, I took the hand he offered as we stood up. He gave me his hoodie so I could cover my face as we walked through the house. The doors creaking a bit, “Who is that? Did you replace y/n?” A boy asked, “No I didn’t she is literally here.” He sassed. We reached the bathroom. My hands and body still shaking.

I pulled the hoodie down revealing my puffy face. My eyes red, cheeks swollen, lips too. I gulped at the sight of myself.

“You know for someone who just cried for like an one and half you still look beautiful.” Tom teased. I smiled weakly. I think the only reason I wasn’t crying was because I had no more water left in my body.

I took a deep breath before wiping my face and applying some cream. For my face. My eyes still red, lips and cheeks still swollen. I turned towards Tom. Thats when it hit me. I wasn’t in love with him. I was madly, truly, deeply in love with this kid. I pulled his face to mine kissing him. His lips soft and warm. Mine probably dry and salty.

I was all hitting me left and right. I needed time to heal. I needed to love me. I never got that. I had jumped from heart ache to heart ache. Never let myself heal. It was like I have a God Shaped hole and it was infected.

“Tom I’m broken. I’m completely damaged.” I said, “I know. I was waiting for you to let me fix you. But, you never did. You pushed me away.” He responded. He was right I started pushing him and everyone away. 

“Don’t say goodbye YN” Tom said. Now was his time to cry. 

“Im way too at a goodbye tom” i said I tried to push pass him, but was pushed against the wall only to have lips pressed to mine. they were cold and salty. 

“Dont leave me” he said, 

“ok” 

[bomberqueen17]

I shouldn’t be surprised, but-- the reviewer who wrote and posted this review (who WORKS for a PUBLICATION where that is her JOB), who went out of her way to continue playing the game, and in the end wrote a comprehensive and very fair review of the game as well as a GUIDE for how to play it safely if you’re epileptic, but posted this excerpt to her Twitter to warn epileptics--

she’s getting sent a barrage of seizure-trigger media and videos and gifs, much of it deceptively labeled, by Online Gamer Types who seem to believe that harming/killing epileptics is the POINT. (Or, maybe, it’s just more that women should shut up; it’s hard to tell with these types.)

(ALso I’ve seen elsewhere in the reblog chain that closing your eyes won’t prevent a seizure, so don’t rely on that.) (Worth pointing out that some people don’t know they’re prone to seizures until something like this triggers one, and if there’s no one to help this can kill them, so this isn’t just dangerous to people who know they’re epileptic.)

I’m sorry to people who were looking forward to this game, and I’m sorry to people who (like me!) liked Witcher 3 and thought CDPR might be sort of neat. This is so disappointing. And worse, because it seems like yet another thing we’ve decided to “politicize”, where the objectively harmful thing is somehow defensible as a “political” position?

AHH as I was researching this to put in the link to the game reviewer’s Twitter I saw this!

[ID: a tweet from Liana Ruppert, @DirtyEffinHippy, saying “I cried” with the cry and purple heart emojis in a quote-retweet of another user, Elise Favis, whose quoted tweet reads “Booted up Cyperpunk 2077 to see a seizure warning come up at the start of the game that wasn’t there before. Really amazing to see how @DirtyEffinHippy helped make meaningful change happen for the safety of players.” *applause emoji* /end desc]

The thread, here, goes on and Ruppert says she’s been contacted by several other major game studios to tell her this has made them take seizure safety more seriously and re-evaluate their process.

So I’ll link to that instead of combing back to find the Tweet I’d seen from her earlier where she was being sent horrible things. (Ah, and here she asks people to stop commenting on that part because it’s warping into something that thas nothing to do with her work.) We know it’s bad; let’s see that good can come of it too.

How in the world did CDPR get this game past compliance, holy shit

[networkingdefinition]

Goals The Power Line To Success And Achievement

Official Website: Goals The Power Line To Success And Achievement

Objectives give you instructions in all locations of your life Personal, Job, Spiritual, Material, and also Contribution. Objectives offer you an objective in life. A reason to rise early in the morning and also go to bed late in the evening. Objectives will certainly put drive and passion right into your life. Not having objectives is similar to sailing a ship throughout the Atlantic without a map. Goals, like maps, aid you reach your location much faster than sailing though life aimlessly.

– HOW-DO-I-SET-GOALS-?

You must fantasize! Imagine every little thing you desire, as well as have always desired in every aspect of your life. There are no restrictions.

Ask yourself, What would certainly I attempt to do, if I knew I could not fail? What would I desire for my life if I knew I could have it?

Enable yourself to dream like you did as a kid. Compose your concepts down on paper as well as decide which ones are the most crucial to you.

On a fresh item of paper, compose down one objective at a time. Close to the heading, compose down a target date for achieving that goal.

To assist achieve the long term goal, established a time line making use of short term goals. For example, if your long-term individual goal is to loose 60 lbs. in one year, set short term goals leading up to the long term objective. In this example you could establish short term objective to loose 5 pounds. each month. If you have to make modifications to your action plan, this is an efficient way to reviewing your progression aiding you to determine.

– THE-SECRETS-OF-ACHIEVING-YOUR-GOALS-.

1)– Make-your-goals-inspirational-.

You need to set objectives grand enough to test on your own. Remember that if you don’t need to push yourself beyond your present restrictions to reach your goals, you’re not really attaining anything. To genuinely be successful, and reach your real possibility, you must constantly push yourself to relocate beyond your convenience area.

2)– Define-your-goals-with-clarity-.

Be accurate in what you want. The more clearly defined your objective is, the easier it will certainly be to attain. Allow’s state you desire to purchase a residence. To claim you intend to get a house is inadequate. To discover a house you’ll really be happy with, you need to specify exactly what you want. Do you want to reside in the city or the nation? Do you want a 2 story or a bungalow? Do you want a block house or a timber home? How many square feet do you desire? Do you want a pool? How much can you pay for? As you can see there are lots of questions to ask. The more concerns you ask on your own, and also are able to address, the more clear your objective will certainly be. You will be able to produce an activity strategy that will certainly ensure your success as soon as you recognize the exact outcome you desire.

3)– Write-a-paragraph-.

Create a paragraph or 2 defining exactly why you definitely should acquire your goal. Write down all the reasons why you are dedicated to attain your objective.

Just how would certainly you feel one year from now if you were to achieve all your objectives? Just how would that make you really feel regarding on your own? Would your feel proud? Would your self-worth be raised? Would you really feel unstoppable? Would you really feel much more positive in your capacity? What outcomes would you receive from reaching your goals? Would certainly you have higher work safety and security? Would certainly you be up for a promo? Would you be earning even more money? Would certainly your friends and family take pride in you? Exactly how would certainly that make you feel?

4)– Write-another-paragraph-!

This paragraph or 2 needs to explain what will certainly happen if you don’t acquire your goal. Just how will you really feel? The more feeling you can put behind the factors why you need to succeed and why you should not fall short, the a lot more fully commited to achieving your goals you will certainly become.

5)– Constantly-evaluate-your-progress-.

Having an activity plan is inadequate. The captain in the previous instance will need to constantly examine his development in order to make sure he is on target. Unforeseen obstacles make certain to develop, such as a hailstorm, or raised southerly winds. As a result, he may need to boost his speed or guide the watercraft in an extra western direction. To put it simply, observe what is functioning as well as what is not. Don’t squander your time with it if a method is not working. Adjustment your strategy.

6)– Never-lose-sight-of-your-goal-.

When you obtain up and also every night prior to you go to bed, take the time to assess your goals every early morning. This will certainly keep them fresh in your mind. If you think evaluating your goals twice a day is excessive to ask, perhaps you should reevaluate what it is you want. Ask yourself, How important is it to me that I attain my objectives?

7) -Don’t- procrastinate-.

Procrastination is a silent killer. Recognize that the only means to achieve your goals is to take action! If you don’t apply it, expertise indicates nothing. How many individuals have you encounter an astonishing amount of education working a mediocre task? The globe has plenty of people that do not use their knowledge. On the other hand, chances are you know of people with much less instructional background who use every little thing they discover. These people are typically the ones that are most successful in all locations of their lives.

Do something right currently that will assist you to achieve your goals. There is no time like the present! Each action you take brings you one step better to the life you desire.

– THE-BENEFITS-OF-GOAL-SETTING-.

You will certainly observe a boost in your power level as you start to live your life with passion, the interest that having a meaningful objective will certainly provide you. With goals, you develop your fate. Objectives give you a purpose in life.

– PROOF-.

The complying with are instances of individuals that have actually achieved their goals. How has it altered their lives and also possibly the lives of others?

Mom Teresa.

Nelson Mandella.

Michael Jordan.

Mark McGwire.

What objectives have you attained that have changed your life, and also perhaps the lives of others? Perhaps it was,.

Education and learning.

Connection.

New cars and truck.

Job interview.

Weight loss.

Exercise program.

Every little thing you do is a cause instated. Despite just how little the act may appear, it will ultimately have an effect on your life.

– OBSERVATIONS-.

You will quickly notice your mind will become a magnet for drawing in any type of details or chance that can help you achieve your objectives much more quickly. As an example, have you ever played the game, Strike Buggy? Otherwise, it goes something such as this. When driving in an automobile with a friend, the initial individual to see a Volkswagen “Pest gets to punch the various other person in the shoulder while saying loudly the color of the vehicle Punch Buggy Red! Once you begin playing this video game, you will certainly be shocked to find how swiftly your arm ends up being aching! That’s right, suddenly you will certainly become a magnet for Volkswagen Vermin! Everywhere you look, you will certainly see one.

The same point holds true of your objectives. When you know exactly what you are searching for, it will inexplicably occur. This is based upon the sensation that You Obtain What You Concentrate on.

There is little factor in only allowing on your own to appreciate life at the point of accomplishing a goal. Whether you are aware of it or not, the bulk of your time is spent aiming to attain goals. The goals that can truly alter our lives if we commit to pursuing them.

Goals, like maps, assist you obtain to your destination much faster than cruising though life aimlessly.

To assist attain the long term objective, established a time line using brief term objectives. You will discover a boost in your energy level as you begin to live your life with passion, the enthusiasm that having a purposeful objective will certainly give you. There is little factor in just enabling yourself to appreciate life at the factor of accomplishing a goal. The objectives that can absolutely alter our lives if we devote to pursuing them.

[clickbank-storefront-bestselling]

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'a', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_a').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_a img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'e', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_e').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_e img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'i', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_i').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_i img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'o', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_o').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_o img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'u', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_u').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_u img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'y', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_y').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_y img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

[equitiesstocks]

Goals The Power Line To Success And Achievement

Official Website: Goals The Power Line To Success And Achievement

Objectives give you instructions in all locations of your life Personal, Job, Spiritual, Material, and also Contribution. Objectives offer you an objective in life. A reason to rise early in the morning and also go to bed late in the evening. Objectives will certainly put drive and passion right into your life. Not having objectives is similar to sailing a ship throughout the Atlantic without a map. Goals, like maps, aid you reach your location much faster than sailing though life aimlessly.

– HOW-DO-I-SET-GOALS-?

You must fantasize! Imagine every little thing you desire, as well as have always desired in every aspect of your life. There are no restrictions.

Ask yourself, What would certainly I attempt to do, if I knew I could not fail? What would I desire for my life if I knew I could have it?

Enable yourself to dream like you did as a kid. Compose your concepts down on paper as well as decide which ones are the most crucial to you.

On a fresh item of paper, compose down one objective at a time. Close to the heading, compose down a target date for achieving that goal.

To assist achieve the long term goal, established a time line making use of short term goals. For example, if your long-term individual goal is to loose 60 lbs. in one year, set short term goals leading up to the long term objective. In this example you could establish short term objective to loose 5 pounds. each month. If you have to make modifications to your action plan, this is an efficient way to reviewing your progression aiding you to determine.

– THE-SECRETS-OF-ACHIEVING-YOUR-GOALS-.

1)– Make-your-goals-inspirational-.

You need to set objectives grand enough to test on your own. Remember that if you don’t need to push yourself beyond your present restrictions to reach your goals, you’re not really attaining anything. To genuinely be successful, and reach your real possibility, you must constantly push yourself to relocate beyond your convenience area.

2)– Define-your-goals-with-clarity-.

Be accurate in what you want. The more clearly defined your objective is, the easier it will certainly be to attain. Allow’s state you desire to purchase a residence. To claim you intend to get a house is inadequate. To discover a house you’ll really be happy with, you need to specify exactly what you want. Do you want to reside in the city or the nation? Do you want a 2 story or a bungalow? Do you want a block house or a timber home? How many square feet do you desire? Do you want a pool? How much can you pay for? As you can see there are lots of questions to ask. The more concerns you ask on your own, and also are able to address, the more clear your objective will certainly be. You will be able to produce an activity strategy that will certainly ensure your success as soon as you recognize the exact outcome you desire.

3)– Write-a-paragraph-.

Create a paragraph or 2 defining exactly why you definitely should acquire your goal. Write down all the reasons why you are dedicated to attain your objective.

Just how would certainly you feel one year from now if you were to achieve all your objectives? Just how would that make you really feel regarding on your own? Would your feel proud? Would your self-worth be raised? Would you really feel unstoppable? Would you really feel much more positive in your capacity? What outcomes would you receive from reaching your goals? Would certainly you have higher work safety and security? Would certainly you be up for a promo? Would you be earning even more money? Would certainly your friends and family take pride in you? Exactly how would certainly that make you feel?

4)– Write-another-paragraph-!

This paragraph or 2 needs to explain what will certainly happen if you don’t acquire your goal. Just how will you really feel? The more feeling you can put behind the factors why you need to succeed and why you should not fall short, the a lot more fully commited to achieving your goals you will certainly become.

5)– Constantly-evaluate-your-progress-.

Having an activity plan is inadequate. The captain in the previous instance will need to constantly examine his development in order to make sure he is on target. Unforeseen obstacles make certain to develop, such as a hailstorm, or raised southerly winds. As a result, he may need to boost his speed or guide the watercraft in an extra western direction. To put it simply, observe what is functioning as well as what is not. Don’t squander your time with it if a method is not working. Adjustment your strategy.

6)– Never-lose-sight-of-your-goal-.

When you obtain up and also every night prior to you go to bed, take the time to assess your goals every early morning. This will certainly keep them fresh in your mind. If you think evaluating your goals twice a day is excessive to ask, perhaps you should reevaluate what it is you want. Ask yourself, How important is it to me that I attain my objectives?

7) -Don’t- procrastinate-.

Procrastination is a silent killer. Recognize that the only means to achieve your goals is to take action! If you don’t apply it, expertise indicates nothing. How many individuals have you encounter an astonishing amount of education working a mediocre task? The globe has plenty of people that do not use their knowledge. On the other hand, chances are you know of people with much less instructional background who use every little thing they discover. These people are typically the ones that are most successful in all locations of their lives.

Do something right currently that will assist you to achieve your goals. There is no time like the present! Each action you take brings you one step better to the life you desire.

– THE-BENEFITS-OF-GOAL-SETTING-.

You will certainly observe a boost in your power level as you start to live your life with passion, the interest that having a meaningful objective will certainly provide you. With goals, you develop your fate. Objectives give you a purpose in life.

– PROOF-.

The complying with are instances of individuals that have actually achieved their goals. How has it altered their lives and also possibly the lives of others?

Mom Teresa.

Nelson Mandella.

Michael Jordan.

Mark McGwire.

What objectives have you attained that have changed your life, and also perhaps the lives of others? Perhaps it was,.

Education and learning.

Connection.

New cars and truck.

Job interview.

Weight loss.

Exercise program.

Every little thing you do is a cause instated. Despite just how little the act may appear, it will ultimately have an effect on your life.

– OBSERVATIONS-.

You will quickly notice your mind will become a magnet for drawing in any type of details or chance that can help you achieve your objectives much more quickly. As an example, have you ever played the game, Strike Buggy? Otherwise, it goes something such as this. When driving in an automobile with a friend, the initial individual to see a Volkswagen “Pest gets to punch the various other person in the shoulder while saying loudly the color of the vehicle Punch Buggy Red! Once you begin playing this video game, you will certainly be shocked to find how swiftly your arm ends up being aching! That’s right, suddenly you will certainly become a magnet for Volkswagen Vermin! Everywhere you look, you will certainly see one.

The same point holds true of your objectives. When you know exactly what you are searching for, it will inexplicably occur. This is based upon the sensation that You Obtain What You Concentrate on.

There is little factor in only allowing on your own to appreciate life at the point of accomplishing a goal. Whether you are aware of it or not, the bulk of your time is spent aiming to attain goals. The goals that can truly alter our lives if we commit to pursuing them.

Goals, like maps, assist you obtain to your destination much faster than cruising though life aimlessly.

To assist attain the long term objective, established a time line using brief term objectives. You will discover a boost in your energy level as you begin to live your life with passion, the enthusiasm that having a purposeful objective will certainly give you. There is little factor in just enabling yourself to appreciate life at the factor of accomplishing a goal. The objectives that can absolutely alter our lives if we devote to pursuing them.

[clickbank-storefront-bestselling]

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'a', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_a').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_a img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'e', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_e').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_e img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'i', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_i').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_i img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'o', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_o').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_o img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'u', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_u').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_u img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'y', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '4', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_y').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_y img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); );

[yumenosakiacademy]

Capita’s (google translated) christmas english voicelines, desc, and background text! Again, some of these lines translated oddly, but i tried to decipher them the best i could

Description:

The Wonderland · Prince of Wondermare of Forst's caterpillar clan. Has a strong inquiry and has doubts about everything. I am also interested in the Santa Claus I heard from you, and I am planning to explore it.

Background:

You were invited to Capita, and you visited Wondermare. I will go to the city to collect information with him who is interested in the man you spoke of...-

Before Awakening 1 There is such an event. Really interesting ... will not you tell me more?

Before Awakening 2 What on earth is Santa Claus like that? (Note: This translated wrong so i had to guess what it was supposed to be translated to. Maybe it’s “what on earth is santa claus? Why is he like that?”)

Sun 1 Of course it is nice to get a gift, but I don’t think that choosing is very pleasant...

Sun 2 A gift for me? From you? I did not imagine this [would happen].......

Moon 1 When I think of you, my heart is overflowing. Warm, gentle ... abstract, I feel like that (Note: 1st line was originally “The heart to think of you is overflowing” on google translate)

Moon 2 Does Santa Claus come to Forst? ...That's too bad (Note: Forst is where he leaves, in case u didnt kno!)

Morning I should wake up in the morning and look into the socks... But will it go into socks? (Note: he means stockings)

Afternoon It takes time and effort to prepare... However, such an experience is also interesting

Evening Distribute gifts during the night? All over the world? What kind of... [That is...] (Note: that line in [ ] is what i think should’ve been there bc google translate mistranslated the last word but when i google translated the last word alone, it meant ‘it is’ so...)

Prince Display I am sorry to have come bothering you... But I could not suppress my curiosity

Status I was looking forward to seeing you. You will always be attracted to your story (Note: ?)

Status (Sun) It seems that it takes more time to choose a gift for you than to give a gift to many people

Status (Moon) How about that? Was the role of Santa Claus worked [played] well?

Awakening (Sun) This winter we will spend with you ... It is very nice thing. It's a meaningful way to use it

Awakening (Moon) He who’s named Santa Claus... will I be able to act as a substitute

Training I am understanding while participating... the meaning of the event called Christmas (Note: Google translate said “while drowning” but that’s Not Right so i’m guessing it as ‘participating’)

Formation Let's enjoy the mystery of Christmas

Nice Chain With this... I do not think I can meet Santa Claus

Great Chain Its delicacy is like crystals of snow.

Excellent Chain The feelings you put in are transmitted. Thank you

Skill Let's unravel [the] Christmas mystery

Skill (Sun) Let's prepare a gift for you

Skill (Moon) Well? Do you see Santa Claus?

Start Is that not Santa Claus?

Attack It is troublesome.

Damaged No problem.

Recover Much Appreciated (Note: the phrase he says is basically just one of showing thanks/gratitude)

Fever We have to prepare gifts

End Turn Will this be enough?

Clear Where is Santa Claus?

Result Will it be a present?

Community There are various books here. It is likely to encounter many mysteries

Friend Support He often came. Let's be modestly hospitable. (Note: I think the ‘he’ in this line refers to Santa? The hospitable line could be referring to the practice of leaving cookies/goodies out for santa, so he wants to do something similar maybe)

Welcome Party What is this celebration? Welcome party? My……? It is interesting.

Birthday You always give me a nice mystery... Let me give you a special gift from me today

Login Bonus 1 It is a present for you who was a good girl... Is this right for you? (Note: Google mistranslated so i had to partially guess on that first line, and it said good boy but since mc is a girl...)

Login Bonus 2 Merry Christmas. Your world with such customs... it’s really interesting

[networkingdefinition]

Booty Quotes

Official Website: Booty Quotes

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• Actually, the challenge I’ve always had is being too thin, so I love that now I have a booty, and obviously I love showing my cleavage. – Christina Aguilera • As a notorious multi-tasker, I love exercise that serves several purposes. I ride my bike to work, do yoga to relax, and go out dancing to get my booty-shaking on! – Karla Cheatham Mosley • At the moment I am looking into astrology, which seems indispensable for a proper understanding of mythology. There are strange and wondrous things in these lands of darkness. Please, don’t worry about my wanderings in these infinitudes. I shall return laden with rich booty for our knowledge of the human psyche. – Carl Jung

jQuery(document).ready(function($) var data = action: 'polyxgo_products_search', type: 'Product', keywords: 'Booty', orderby: 'rand', order: 'DESC', template: '1', limit: '68', columns: '4', viewall:'Shop All', ; jQuery.post(spyr_params.ajaxurl,data, function(response) var obj = jQuery.parseJSON(response); jQuery('#thelovesof_booty').html(obj); jQuery('#thelovesof_booty img.swiper-lazy:not(.swiper-lazy-loaded)' ).each(function () var img = jQuery(this); img.attr("src",img.data('src')); img.addClass( 'swiper-lazy-loaded' ); img.removeAttr('data-src'); ); ); ); • Baby booty, juicy fruity, truck stop cutie, road side beauty, I’m in love with you. – James Taylor • Belgarath and Garion effortlessly hurdled over the driftwood and loped off into the fog. “It’s going to be a wet day,” Garion noted soundlessly as he ran alongside the great silver wolf. “Your fur won’t melt.” “I know, but my paws get cold when they’re wet.” “I’ll have Durnik make you some little booties.” “That would be absolutely ridiculous, Grandfather,” Garion said indignantly. – David Eddings • Booty is just a ghetto expression, and I’m just a booty star. – Richard Pryor • Boys like a little more booty to hold at night. – Meghan Trainor • Brushing my Grilzz Before I Booty Pop. A Woman’s work is never Done! • Every inch of you is perfect from the bottom to the top. My mama, she told me don’t worry about your size. She says boys like a little more booty to hold at night. Yeah I won’t be no stick figure silicone Barbie doll, so if that’s what you’re into then go ahead and move along. – Meghan Trainor • Everybody knows I have the ratchetest booty tattoo of an ex-boyfriend. – Adrienne Bailon • For women, marriages foreclosed often resulted in an accumulation of booty; for men, these failed projects of implausible optimism were more likely to manifest themselves in material lack. It was hard to resist the metaphorical impression that women got to keep the past itself, whereas men were simply robbed of it. – Lionel Shriver • Here she was, a women who could bolt-load a crossbow in under a second, put half a dozen long arrows in the air in fewer than five, blade a target dead through the sweet spot at six meters, on the run, on an off day; and yet knitting a pair of baby booties seemed completely beyond her power. – Justin Cronin • His sumptuous tents, and those of his satraps, afforded an immense booty to the conqueror; and an incident is mentioned which proves the rustic but martial ignorance of the legions in the elegant superfluities of life. A bag of shining leather, filled with pearls, fell into the hands of a private soldier; he carefully preserved the bag, but he threw away its contents, judging that whatever was of no use could not possibly be of any value. – Edward Gibbon • I ain’t no movie star, man. I’m a booty star. – Richard Pryor • I appreciate the female foot, but I’ve never said that I have a foot fetish. But I am a lower track guy. I like legs’ I like booties’. I have a black male sexuality. – Quentin Tarantino • I do not see how it’s possible to have a “friends with benefits” lifestyle, because if the sex is great, it’s going to naturally expand into a more meaningful relationship. Otherwise, it’s just a booty call. – Jenna Elfman • I don’t have 30 days and 30 nights, to show you why all the hoochies say there’s nothing finer than Scott Steiner, but all I need is one night to have your wife call me for the rest of her life, the big bad booty daddy, so this goes to all my freaks out there, Big Poppa Pump is your hook up, hollar if you hear me. – Scott Steiner • I feel like my figure is a challenge because I’m quite flat chested but I’ve got a booty so I’ve got to look for the right things. – Ellie Goulding • I honestly really, really love Topshop. I’ve bought a lot of booties from there. I think they have a great selection of really funky booties at Topshop. – Adrienne Bailon • I honestly really, really love Topshop. I’ve bought a lot of booties from there. I think they have a great selection of really funky booties at Topshop. My splurge would be a pair of leather Christian Louboutin over-the-knee boots. They’re sick! I would do a really stretchy skinny jean under a black turtleneck and call it a day! – Adrienne Bailon • I learned the hula, so now I know how to shake my booty Hawaiian style. – Sanjaya Malakar • I like Pirate’s Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. – Queen Latifah • I see no women out here, and you’re chanting about a male organ, now tell me who’s the fruit bootie? – John Layfield • I shake my booty all the time! It’s the best workout! – Ashlee Simpson • I think some dogs may like the attention of being dressed up by their humans because they interpret it as affection, but unless it’s something that you’ve made the dog used to from the time it was a puppy, it’s probably going to always feel a little weird and unnatural to the dog. This doesn’t mean I think people should never dress their dogs up as long as they do it for the right reasons. If you’re putting booties and a coat on your dog to protect it from the weather, then that’s a pretty legitimate reason. – Cesar Millan • I was in a very fancy, high-end boutique where the sales associates stand around like mannequins. I walked in and the first thing they said was, “Ooh it smells like booty in here” because they knew me from Scream Queens. – Niecy Nash • I’d love to be in the ’70s. I’d love to have a big, long wig parted down the middle with flat-ironed hair and bell-bottoms. They’re actually very flattering for my figure. The wider the leg, the better for a person with a booty. – Sarah Paulson • If the guy’s a cutie, you’ve gotta tap that booty. – Betty White • If you got a booty, you’re going to dance to disco, funk, you know, whatever’s going on. Funk is going to be involved in it. – George Clinton • If you take a needle and stick her in the booty and take a needle and stick me in the booty, we’re both going to say ouch. – Shaquille O’Neal • I’m Cuban, so I like a bit of curve. I just want my booty to have a little lift! – Odette Annable • Im going to be shaking my booty when Im 55. – Natalie Merchant • I’m not a corny-ass booty freak! I’m the greatest musician of all-time. – Kanye West • It is when Pirates count their booty that they become mere thieves. – William Bolitho • It’s about giving the people what they want. So many people have told me that they’ve made love to my records so what I’ve delivered this time is an album about sex. Pretty much every song has that theme. Straight no chasers, it’s booty music! – Tyrese Gibson • It’s frustrating me – that booty is gonna sag at some point. And if you allow enough people to come inside your physical space, they leave traces. – Jill Scott • It’s kind of cool—and it makes me feel like a badass. I get more girls than my boyfriend. They always tweet me about my booty. – Naya Rivera • Ive always had a booty even when I was a baby, and when I was in high school and was skinny, I still had the booty. In Hollywoods eyes, the perfect women has to be a stick figure, tall, blonde hair, with big boobs. – Coco Austin • Just broke up with somebody. Well, it wasn’t really a break up, it was a booty call I might have took too serious. – J. B. Smoove

• Like your booty don’t stink. – LL Cool J • Lingerie has gotten really cute, with little booty underwear and the cute little bras. They’ve gotten really detailed. I saw one the other day with little baby pearls on the strap. I had to have it. – Britney Spears • Move over just a bit to the right of me, For I cannot see Where the booty is. – The jersey • Nicki Minaj has a better booty; but I have better shoes. – Rihanna • Nothing retains less of desire in art, in science, than this will to industry, booty, possession. – Other Breton • Now a writer can make himself a nice career while he is alive by espousing a political cause, working for it, making a profession of believing in it, and if it wins he will be very well placed. All politics is a matter of working hard without reward, or with a living wage for a time, in the hope of booty later. A man can be a Fascist or a Communist and if his outfit gets in he can get to be an ambassador or have a million copies of his books printed by the Government or any of the other rewards the boys dream about. – Ernest Hemingway • Nowadays, it’s good to eat the booty like groceries, but back then, going down on a woman was sort of “Ew.” – Jensen Carp • One only wishes Wayne LaPierre and his NRA board of directors could be drafted to some of these scenes, where they would be required to put on booties and rubber gloves and help clean up the blood, the brains, and the chunks of intestine still containing the poor wads of half-digested food that were some innocent bystander’s last meal. – Stephen King • Other people write about the bling and the booty. I write about the pus and the gnats. To me, that’s beautiful. – Vic Chesnutt • Party politics in modern democratic society means pandering to a wide variety of different groups and sympathizing with their often quite base motives, such as revenge, power, booty, and spoils, to maintain the necessary level of support. – Randal Marlin • People love their animals so much so that they put little clothes on them and necklaces and booties and things like that. And if you love your animal, then you should feed them something that’s not dangerous for them. There’s a lot of poisonous stuff that they’re putting in a lot of that food, those by-products. – Ellen DeGeneres • Pop stars are sending the message that their sexuality is the strongest thing they have to offer, and that’s confusing and misleading to girls and women, especially since there’s not enough of a counterbalance from those who rely on their other assets, like their music. Also, with the new obsession with all things “booty,” it’s important that women – and it’s often women of color – aren’t turned into mere caricatures. Right now it’s: “Bend over.” That’s all people want to see. That’s crazy. It’s so far from where we should be. – Santigold • Regardless of its purpose, the humpback-whale song is the most complex piece of nonhuman composition on earth. Whether it’s art, prayer, or booty call, the humpback song is an amazing thing to experience firsthand, and I suspect that even once the science of it is put to bed, it will remain, as long as they sing, magic. – Christopher Moore • She had a big ole booty, I was doing my duty. – LL Cool J • Socrates said, the unexamined life is not worth living. My dad said, Booty – mmm mmm. – Christopher Titus • Someone should make a Kickstarter to get Taylor Swift a booty. – Diplo • Soul ties. The thing that can make you hear an old-school slow jam and think of somebody you haven’t seen in years. Soul ties. The thing that makes old people who’ve been together for years finish each other’s sentences. Don’t you wish mama had told you when you were young that, when you lie with someone, you lie not just with her body but also with her soul? And whatever condition the other person’s soul is in, you are guaranteed to take a piece with you—whether you want to or not. Instead of being amazed at her booty, you should have focused on her mind. – Kirk Franklin • The Americans may think they have ‘liberated’ Baghdad but the tens of thousands of thieves – they came in families and cruised the city in trucks and cars searching for booty – seem to have a different idea what liberation means. – Robert Fisk • The art of using troops is this: ……When ten to the enemy’s one, surround him; ……When five times his strength, attack him; ……If double his strength, divide him; ……If equally matched you may engage him; ……If weaker numerically, be capable of withdrawing; ……And if in all respects unequal, be capable of eluding him, ……….for a small force is but booty for one more powerful. – Sun Tzu • The majority of the so-called great powers have long been exploiting and enslaving a whole series of small and weak peoples. And the imperialist war is nothing other than a war for the division and redivision of this kind of booty. – Vladimir Lenin • We be sticking pill up girl’s booty, too! – Lil Boosie • What is it with this American booty culture? It seems to me to be a form of obsession. – Pippa Middleton • What is missing in a lot of urban music is perspective. You hear a lot of regurgitated perspective. It’s a lot of: out at the club. Had drinks. Patrón. Big booties. It’s this regurgitated idea of living in this, I don’t know, one-night-stand moment that always starts at the club and Patrón. And so perspective, perspective, perspective is what I’m an advocate of. – Miguel • When I discovered Gil Scott-Heron, I discovered a musical hero, a man who spoke baritone truth to power over jazzy funk at a time when funky music was primarily about shake, shake, shaking your booty. – Will Hermes • Why can’t a heterosexual guy tell a heterosexual guy / That he thinks his booty is fly? – Jemaine Clement • You can call me gay or a tutti-frutti But I won’t touch it until I know whose booty – Erick Sermon • You have a responsibility to your work, to your choices. Once you get to a certain level of quality and commitment, you don’t want to go back and make Booty Call 7. – Jamie Foxx • You know me. It’s my duty to please that booty. – Samuel L. Jackson

[clickbank-storefront-bestselling]

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