#went to see it with a friend and we almost died at the confession booth scene lmaoo

[fall-dog]

i finally saw the banshees of inisherin and god mutuals you were not wrong abt it!! the claustrophobia!! the despair!! the old man drama!! the humour!! the sorrow!!

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Hi hun! Hope you’re doing well! Could a request a Shikamaru fic! I was thinking maybe it’s obvious to everyone that Shikamaru and Reader like each-other (except themselves of course). But a mission where they have to pretend to be a couple and they finally confess.

😘

Pretenders (Shikamaru x Reader)

A/N: another request. Im not super proud of this one, i really got stuck halfway through and i think that shows here. Thanks for requesting though, and hopefully you still enjoy. Trigger Warning for sexual assault.

word count: 6500

“So, you two set out on a mission tonight right?” Ino asked, leaning her cheek in her hand, nodding toward her two friends across the booth.

“Yep. Supposedly 3 weeks,” Y/N told her. “I won’t get to see you guys for so long.” The girl took a quick sip of her lemonade and sighed. It was a substantial amount of time. It’d been a while since she’d gone somewhere so intensive.

Shikamaru and Y/N had only a couple more hours before they were to be briefed on the details of otheir next mission and whisked away to a far away land for yet another tedious job. Y/N was perfectly fine with the premise of going on a 3 week mission, she’d been home too long and longed for some kind of adventure. She still wasn’t sure the caliber of the mission, nor did she even know where or what they were doing, but she was excited nonetheless.

Shikamaru, of course, wasn’t too fond of the entire idea. Yes, he was more than happy to find out his mission partner was Y/N L/N. Out of all the people he could have been paired with, she was most definitely the least annoying. He really felt like Kakashi had his back lately with missions, giving him ones that were semi decent, and sending him out with his friends. He was certainly grateful for the Hokage’s assignments.

Choji added from his spot near the wall, taking a second away from munching on his lunch. “It won’t be so bad. You guys have each other, after all. How could things get boring when you have your little girlfriend with you, Shikamaru, am I right?”

“Choji…” Shikamaru groaned, pressing his fingers to either side of his temples. These sorts of things borhered the hell out of him. The constant teasing from everyone, not just his teammates, but literally teachers, other squads, his mother, her grandmother. They weren’t dating. They never were dating.

Yet every person in this damned town was under the assumption there was something going on between them. Really, he was just trying to live his life.

Did he want to date her? Yes, a million times over, yes. She was literally perfect, he couldn’t imagine himself with anyone else. But was Y/N at all interested? Definitely not. She was more oblivious than Naruto was with Hinata, and that’s saying a lot. She seemed to ignore everyone when they made jokes, she thought all his measly attempts at flirting were just normal conversation even when he treated Ino completely differently. She wasn’t a dumb girl either. She was smart in her own right.

That’s why he’d begun to think she was maybe avoiding his advances on purpose. That she didn’t like him and she was trying to let him down easy. It was stupid really, and he wished she would just come out with it already, tell him to his face that she just wanted to be friends. It was frustrating, to say the least, but he kept trying.

He could safely say he hadn’t felt this way for another girl in his entire life, and he wouldn’t give up that easily. He really just wanted other people to mind their business. That’s the reason he shot down all the jokes and comments from his friends. They didn’t need to know about his lovelife, that was personal.

Ino smirked, tossing her ponytail over her shoulder and letting a laugh leave her lips. “Come on, Choji. You know how Shika feels about you teasing him.”

“Fine. But you gotta admit it’s funny.”

They continued on with their conversation, Shikamaru groaning at their jokes and the other two laughing the entire time. That was how it usually went. Y/N just listened quietly, sipping away at her lemonade. Those two, his teammates, they always made jokes, it was normal. She was constantly labeled Shikamaru’s girlfriend, and each time he denied it. Over and over again. He didn’t let a single instance slide by.

That’s how she knew to avoid the subject. To keep her feelings to herself. There was no point in confessing to him when he was already so adamant at keeping their relationship out of other people’s mouths. She was a troublesome girl, anyone who thought he saw her as anything different was delusional.

So she kept quiet, just listening.

Each time someone joked, her stomach would turn and she would wait for him to say something, for him to admit they were right, for him to get flushed in the cheeks, for him to reach out and hold her hand and confess his feelings, and each time she was let down brutally. After enough times getting her heart broken, it was only inevitable she give up this false hope. There was no digging her way into his cold heart. He was so closed off, to get inside...it seemed like an impossible feat.

She wasn’t willing to fight for him anymore. It was tiring, and they never got anywhere.

After enough time, she stopped crying herself to sleep. She stopped talking about her crush with Hinata and Ino when the boys weren’t around. She still looked at him with all the love she had to give. He was the best man she knew, how could she not. She just stopped wishing for something that wasn’t going to happen. She stopped investing so much of her time and energy into a useless, pointless dream.

She was tired of running endlessly in circles, over and over again. All because of his dumbass.

Maybe with time, she could try and get over him. With time she could learn to like him the same way as all their other friends. It was always just the little things that would pull her back in every time. It was the walks home at night when she was tired, or she had too many drinks and he’d wrap his arm around her waist and hold her so tight to his side she could feel his heart beating. It was the times he’d lay beside her in the grass and run his fingers through her hair splayed out over the ground. It was the times he would hold her silently as she cried for her mother and father who’d died, and he would rub her back until she could breathe again.

Every single fucking time she got close, the moments she felt she might not be desperately in love with him anymore, he came right in and stole her heart again. It wasn’t his fault, he was just being a good friend, but God, did it hurt sometimes.

And it wasn’t Ino and Choji’s fault for talking about it. It was so fucking obvious she liked him. Y/N followed Shikamaru around like a lost puppy half the time, what else were they supposed to think? They were just wrong in their assumptions that she was anything more to Shikamaru himself. That the boy thought of her as anything more than a troublesome friend who was always needing help with something or another.

She drank the last bit of her drink and set down the glass. “We better be heading to the Hokage tower soon. It’s almost time, and he still has to debrief us and all, “ she told the boy at her right.

“Yeah. I’ll go get my bag from home first and we’ll meet up there?”

“Got it,” Y/N slid out of the booth and waved to her friends. “See you when we get back.”

“Bye, Y/N!” Ino called as the girl left the restaurant with her book bag over her shoulder. She sighed, sinking down into her seat and glaring over at the pineapple head across from them. “You gotta make your move on this mission, Shika. Stop being such a scaredy cat.”

“Listen, you guys don’t know anything about anything, okay? She doesn’t like me that way. She never has.”

“I never thought I’d have to say this, but you’re dumb, man,” Choji laughed. “She obviously likes you.”

“Yeah, yeah. All of you seem to think that but you don’t see how she is with me. We are purely friends. That’s it.”

“Whatever, man,” he waved off the boy’s stern reply and added, “ Have fun on your trip with Y/N. Hope you get lucky.” Those words caused Shikamaru to heat up from his neck to the tips of his ears and he promptly slid out from his seat, straightening his vest as he did so to try and calm himself. That was unnecessary of his friend to say, for sure.

He turned to them once more and nodded his head. “See you around.”

“See you!”

Now all he needed to do was get his things together and meet up with the girl of his dreams for their weeks long mission. Fun times. Especially now that his friends made him annoyed and frustrated with the entire situation again. He’d have to calm down before seeing her soon.

_______

“We’re doing what?” Y/N asked, staring down at their Hokage in disbelief. He’d been detailing their mission and everything seemed normal so far, infiltrating and learning information about a budding coup in a far away nation just on the edge of the Land of Earth and The Land of Wind. It seemed easy enough at first, but then he kept going.

Kakashi sighed. “I said, you two are to be disguised as a princess and her consort from the Land of Sunflowers. The leaders of this land are expecting these royal visitors and you will be taking their place.”

“So, like, he’s gonna be my husband?” she asked for clarification again. It wasn’t that she didn’t understand his words, it was that she didn’t want to believe them. This was her worst nightmare. They would have to pretend to be in a relationship? Shikamaru was going to hate this more than anything and it would be uncomfortable the entire time.

Why did Kakashi have to pick them two, of all his shinobi? Why?

“Yes. That won’t be a problem for two close friends such as yourselves. After all, that’s why I picked you. You have some kind of dynamic going I feel your targets will find believable.” Shikamaru cursed the heavens. Even the fucking Hokage thought they were involved. This was ridiculous. Now this long ass mission he was already dreading was made ten times worse with this awkward situation. “We’re not gonna have a problem, are we?”

It would be okay though. He just had to take a few deep breaths. That’s all.

“No, sir, of course not. I’m ready for anything you throw at me,” she declared, straightening her back and letting the heat fade from her cheeks. She was embarrassed, obviously, but she couldn’t let the Hokage know. It was easier talking to Kakashi though, much easier than Tsunade. Kakashi watched them grow up, he knew them personally from helping them train. That didn’t mean she couldn’t be flustered.

“You’ll take those bags with you. They have some more suitable clothing for royalty. Put them on when you get close to the village. Throw out any indicators you’re from the Leaf as well.”

“Okay.”

“You’re dismissed. Leave as soon as possible,” the gray haired shinobi told them. She nodded and threw the bag over her shoulder, tossing the other one over to Shikmaru who caught it and slung it onto his back. He definitely wasn’t happy about any of this, but maybe it was a sign.

Ino and Choji told him to confess his feelings to her on this mission. Kakashi just told them they would be pretending to be a married couple. As he watched her walking in front of him down the Tower stairs, her head just barely dipped as she absorbed all the information running through her mind, he wondered if maybe this was his opportunity. A make or break type scenario. He had three weeks to figure out how to tell her how he felt in a more direct way than he’d tried before.

He worked out all the scenarios and their outcomes in his head millions of times and every time they ended in disaster. For someone so great at strategy, he sure did struggle with this one.

“So, I guess we’re married now. Should we start kissing or something?” she asked awkwardly as they reached the bottom of the stairs, shifting back and forth from her toes to her heels. He stopped, more like froze, in his path and stared at her.

“Now you're just making it weird,” he replied. “We aren’t even there yet.”

“I know, I was kidding. Trying to lighten the mood, you know,” she grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. Of course he would reply like that. He didn’t like her at all, he couldn’t even take a fucking joke. Had to get all upset over it like a baby, all because he was so set on never dating her ever, never even entertaining the thought. She rolled her eyes, “You don’t have to be so rude about it, geez.”

She kept walking before he could reply. He had a feeling this trip was going to be a lot worse than anyone had anticipated. He was nervous, grumpy, and preparing for the worst. In fact, what he really wanted was a nice long nap.

_________

The dresses that Kakashi packed for her were...extravagant to say the least. They flowed all the way down to her ankles, thick heavy hoop skirts embroidered from head to toe with symbols of the land of sunflowers. She felt strange with her shoulders exposed and her body on display in these outfits which were so unlike the pants and t-shirts she wore when she was back at home or on a normal mission. She wrapped a shawl around her shoulders and sighed, feeling at least a little covered.

Shikamaru had nice clothes, but they were nothing in comparison to her wild dresses and all the bright colors of the fabric. He looked semi-normal. She was jealous, admittedly, that he still got to wear pants and shirts. He said she looked good in the dress, he actually told her about a dozen times, reassuring over and over again that she looked fine, but she didn’t believe him. She wasn’t dainty, how could she look beautiful when she clearly didn't belong in something so delicate?

Still, when they walked up to the gates of the Land of Shadows, they were greeted like the royalty they pretended to be. They were swept away to the main castle to meet with the King and his wife. It was nearly dinner time, and they were to eat with them as a greeting. It made sense, but Y/N felt herself growing more nervous with the second. She didn’t know the first thing about being a princess, or acting like a monarch. All she knew was fighting and joking with her friends.

Not only that, but how could she convince them that she and Shikamaru were in a relationship? Y/N wasn’t sure they possessed the right dynamic and even if they tried, it would be obvious they were uncomfortable with each other. It was all making her heart race, and she had to take a few deep breaths as they entered the dining room.

But her companion...he knew what he was doing. He was going to put on quite the show, take advantage of the situation. If this week and a half was his only chance to hold Y/N in his heart, than he wouldn't let any opportunities slip by.

Without warning, she found that Shikamaru had reached over and wrapped her hand up in his bigger one, clutching at her shaking fingers. He was so steady, she found herself sinking into his touch. It was comforting, more so than she thought it could be, given the circumstances. His skin was just so warm and soft against hers, it was only natural she felt safer.

“Ah, Princess Ayaka, Duke Hisashi. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” a man called from his place at the table. His wife was sitting beside him, her soft smile only reaching her lips not nearing her eyes. Y/N caught that immediately. Her distance. Silently, she took note of that as the King approached them, extending his arms for an embrace.

“It’s an honor to meet you, your highness,” Shikamaru replied with a smile, an obvious fake one, but damn was he good. She watched as he hugged the man so earnestly, as if he’d sunken right into the role of consort without an issue. She’d have to ask him tonight how he was so good at acting.

“And your beautiful wife,” he extended his hand to the girl and she raised it hesitantly, receiving a soft kiss to the back of her palm. “Come take a seat. Dinner will be served soon.”

The pair took their seats beside each other on the opposite side of the table, Y/N directly across from the Queen, who looked up at her for merely a moment only to sigh and go back to fiddling with the curve of her wine glass. "Your highness," Y/N hummed to the woman who nodded.

"Oh what a dream, to be young and in love," she said. "I remember the days."

"Please dear! To me, you will always be my beautiful young wife! We share a love to last a lifetime," the king cheered, placing his hand over that of his wife's as he took his seat at the table. "I apologize for her gloom. She's been going through a rough patch. We are more than overjoyed to have you here."

"It's fine. We all have our bad days," the girl replied softly.

After a few minutes of small talk, just dipping their feet into the conversation, a couple servants brought out plates of food and wine bottles full of vintage drink truly meant for the highest of royalty. Compared to the plain sake she had drank at home, this was liquid gold dripping down her throat. Shikamaru sent her a warning look. Y/N was known to be quite the lightweight, and even a couple glasses of wine could send her into a tipsy stupor. He really knew her too well, so hyperaware of the things she did.

"So, how did you two meet?" their host asked, taking a moment away from the chicken in front of him. "It's said that you married for love, not arrangement. That's true?"

Y/N and Shikamaru hadn't been versed very well on the details, just on the basics. Her heart beat increased, stress building up. Her lies would have to be good.

"Yes. You've heard right. He was my friend before anything else. We met as children." That much she knew for sure after reading the mission summary.

"Oh wow. Childhood lovers. Very sweet," the queen sighed, resting her cheek in her palm.

Y/N would be lying if she didn't feel a bit of similarities between her own story and that of the real princess she was pretending to be. Shikamaru and Y/N grew up together, for as long as she could remember. She started to love him before she even really knew what love was. It only made sense she pretended to be a princess in the same situation.

And when he held her hand again, this time under the table, his thumb brushing over her knuckles so softly she thought she might melt. Her cheeks began to heat up under his touch and she smiled. It was so nice holding his hand, pretending to care about each other this way. Not that she needed to pretend.

Dinner droned on, and she continued to hold his hand the entire time, besides when they were spooning at their food. For once on a mission, it felt like they were completely at peace. Of course, they were both supposed to be analyzing the movements of everyone around them to make sure no one was planning a coup like Kakashi told them. But she couldn’t held but cherish the moments of calmness and warmth between everyone.

The King and his wife were genuinely some of the kindest people she’d ever met, whether they were just acting that way or not. It was a pleasure to have dinner with them, talking and laughing like an uncle would with his nieces and nephews. It had that same energy, talking to him.

“Hisashi, you wouldn’t mind accompanying me to my library? I have some books I think you might enjoy,” the man said, standing from the table. The rest of them slid out of their chairs after him, and she had to brush down her skirts to make sure everything was in line. It was tedious, wearing these outfits without any prior warning. She felt like a clown. The Queen was so effortless in her movements, how could she not feel stupid standing beside someone so regal?

“That sounds great, your majesty-”

“Not necessary. Call me Shoto, that’s my name after all, and you are an honored guest,” he laughed. He reached over and gave his wife a gentle kiss on the cheek before turning on his heel and heading toward the door. She really expected Shikamaru to just leave with just a simple goodbye, or a “I’ll see you tonight” kind of thing.

Definitely not this.

He was gonna go all out this time around.

“I’m going to kiss you now,” he whispered, just loud enough for only her to hear, over her shoulder into her ear. When his warm breath hit her skin, shivers ran up and down her spine. Her eyes widened and she turned to stare up at him, cursing herself when she felt heat rise up in her cheeks and burn the tips of her ears. Was he serious, or just teasing her? He always liked to crack jokes like that.

But when she felt his rough hand pressed to her cheek, lifting her face ever so carefully to meet his, she knew he wasn’t messing around. His eyes met hers for a split second, and she could have sworn he winked down at her before pressing his lips to hers.

Honestly, she thought she might have a heart attack right there in the dining room. Shikamaru was kissing her. It felt even better than she dreamed it would. Chapped lips running against hers, heat pooling in her stomach, heart pounding in her chest.

As soon as it started, though, the kiss was over, and he took a step back. "See you tonight, Princess."

She was keen on catching the smirk on his lips, and the way he laughed to himself as he walked out of the room with the King before him.

Y/N stood there silently, her fingers pressed to her lips, breath caught in her throat. The boy she’d wanted for so long just kissed her like it was nothing, and she was left all alone to deal with this predicament, all the feelings that came rushing in after. All she knew for sure, whether he was serious or not, was that she really, seriously liked him. She liked him a lot more than she thought.

And now they had a whole week and a half of fake kisses and hand holding to endure. Jeez.

__________

“You know, you’re nothing like the other princesses I’ve met,” the guard said to her as she waited for Shikamaru to show up. He was still out with the King practicing archery. Apparently that was a hobby a lot of these rich country men had. So far, she wasn’t suspecting a thing out of the King or any of his closest acquaintances. They were nice as could be and seemed sincere in their intentions toward the village alliances. She had no reason to suspect them, and was beginning to think a coup was just as Kakashi thought, a mere rumor.

That made things a lot easier.

She sighed, tapping her fingers on her wrist. She wasn’t a fan of having a guard watching her every second of the day, especially not the talkative ones. This one was strange. He gave off this energy she couldn’t describe as anything other than creepy.

“Yeah? That’s nice,” she muttered.

“It’s just, usually princesses are pompous, full of themselves, spoiled women. You aren’t the same,” he continued, even if it was obvious she wanted him to shut up and go about his business while she did hers. She felt uncomfortable being alone in this land, without any of her weapons or the ability to fight back if someone was acting sketchy. She was forced to sit by like some little, ditsy princess just watching and observing.

Honestly, though, Shikamaru was probably having a great time. All he had to do was eat with the royalty, play board games, shoot some arrows, and then go to sleep. There was no extensive fighting or thinking going on, just sitting around observing and waiting for something suspicious to happen.

The queen would normally hang out with the female guests but thanks to her bouts of depression she stayed in her room, leaving Y/N completely at the mercy of time. So much time passed, and she was bored of it.

“I’m honestly just another princess. You’d be surprised though. Many princesses are just as modest as I am, it’s not all that uncommon,” she commented, taking a peek over at the man, only to quickly look away. He had quite the hungry look on his face, and if her eyes hadn’t deceived her, his own were trained right on her breasts. Damn these dresses.

Y/N wrapped her arms across her chest and slumped down, trying to hide herself from this weird man watching over her. Only, it seemed impossible. He was so much taller, could just look over her shoulder. She couldn’t run away and raise suspicion. She had to sit here and wait for someone else to break the tension.

She was scared.

“I meant that as a compliment. You say thank you when someone compliments you, yeah?” he mumbled, a firm hand reaching out to snatch her wrist. It hurt, his grip on her arm, and she winced at the feeling. “Say thank you.”

She bit her lip and refused to meet his eyes, instead focusing on his hands. If she needed to, she would defend herself but only to a small extent. She couldn’t blow her cover just because some guard was manhandling her. Take a deep breath, Y/N. It’s gonna be okay. Just calm down.

“T-Thank you,” she gulped, hoping he would drop her wrist. But he didn’t. He only held on tighter.

He smiled, yellow teeth showing through his thin lips. “See, you are a good girl, aren’t you?” he questioned, and she felt his other hand run up her waist. All she could do was whimper, shivers running up her spine and any skin this man laid his hands on. The only hope she had was that another guard come walking around and see them.

It was unlikely, but she prayed for a savior to make their appearance.

His hand worked its way down to her ass, and she felt him squeeze. Vomit rose up in her throat and she squirmed away, pressing herself against the wall as tight as she could so his hands had nowhere to go. Instead, he took to fondling her breasts in his hands. She could only bite her lips and feel the tears bubble up in her eyes as he pushed down the fabric of her top and pressed his filthy palms against her skin.

“What the fuck?” a voice cursed from behind them. The guard was torn off of her form and she brought up her hands to cover herself, tears still dripping thickly from her eyes as she cried, little breathy sobs leaving her lips. Shikamaru stood there, hands shaking at his sides as he glared over at the guard. “What’s going on here?” he demanded. Y/N watched as her friend turned red in the face, burning up with an anger she rarely saw from him, if ever.

“You tell me, your highness. Your wife seduced me!” the guard cried, clearly lying to cover himself and his sins.

The eyes of all three men, the guard, Shikamaru, and the King standing near the footwell of the stairs, turned to her. She just cried harder, shaking like a leaf in front of everyone. “He grabbed me and started to touch me, and-and I couldn’t do anything,” Y/N told them all through her pained cries.

The King marched up the steps and grabbed his guard by the arm, yanking him toward the doorway to enter the castle. He appeared worn from his workout, tired and sweaty, but he was awake enough to realize the severity of the situation. He bowed low to Y/N and her companion.

His apology ran thick from his mustached lips, “This is unacceptable. Honored guests, I apologize for everything that’s happened. I will take care of this, I assure you. Please, don’t hesitate to ask for anything you need tonight.” Shikamaru nodded, and they watched as the pair of men walked into the castle, no doubt to find another guard to incarcerate the guard in question.

Shikamaru turned to her and winced, seeing her dress pushed down below her breasts and the tremors running through her hands desperate to cover them. He watched as hot, heavy tears ran thick down her cheeks and her lips quivered and shook with fear and trauma. Gently, he moved her hands to the side and brought her dress back up to cover her chest. He worked carefully, making sure not to startle her or make things worse.

The woman sunk into his touch, leaning her head against his shoulder and sobbing. “It’s gonna be okay, Y/N. You’re safe now.” He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and tugged her close to his chest, pressing a soft, gentle hand to the back of her head to stroke her hair. “I’m so sorry. I won’t leave you alone again, okay?”

“Shika, “ she whimpered, “I’ve never felt so helpless in my entire life. I couldn’t do anything to defend myself and there was no one else around to help me. I-I didn’t know what to do.”

“I know. You must have been so scared,” he whispered. She just nodded against his shoulder, crying deeper into his chest. He hugged her tighter and swore to himself, even if he couldn't make it happen, that he would protect her. This kind of thing would never happen to her again if he had any say at all. “I promise this won’t happen again.”

"I've just never been in that position before. I always have the upper hand. It was awful. I was so scared and I wanted to cry for you to come help me but I didn't know where you were."

"God, I'm sorry," he mumbled, hugging her tighter in a desperate attempt to calm her shaking. He just wanted for her to be better, even if he knew that wasn't an option right now.

He felt so hopeless, knowing the only thing he could do was promise, to say things without any actual basis behind them. He was just whispering words to the wind hoping they would stick and he was right. He cursed himself for not being there in the first place to protect her, to make sure something like this never happened in the first place. He really was useless when she needed him the most.

He wouldn’t even argue if she said she wanted to go home, if she never wanted to see him again. He let her down. For the first time ever, he let her down in the most terrible, awful way he could think of. And now she was crying and he didn’t know how to make it better. He was really trash.

For now, all he could do though was hug her and promise her the world, all these things that might make her feel safe and comfortable, make her feel less alone and scared. It was the least he could do.

________

Finally, after a long evening of socializing and another huge dinner literally fit for a king, Y/N found herself stripping off her gowns and heavy undergarments, switching into something much lighter and comfortable for the night.

She was tired from the day. From being left alone for the good part of the morning just sitting in the sun waiting around. She was tired from the assault on her body by the guard whom was supposedly in jail right now for his actions. She was tired from all the crying and the shaking. She was just tired.

Shikamaru was out, finishing up drinks with the King and some of his subordinates for the time being, so she sunk down into the mattress near the far wall, curling up under the down covers and pulling a book from the table beside her. Anything to ease her mind for a while. She felt safe being alone in the confides of the bedroom, knowing that her friend was right down the hall if she needed him.

She scanned the pages of the novel quietly, humming each time she turned a page, leaning on her elbow so the pages would be illuminated in the candlelight.

After about an hour, the door slid open and her companion entered, shutting the door silently behind him. "You aren't asleep? I expected you to be after such a long day."

"I'm tired, but I'm not in the mood for sleep yet," she shrugged, still skimming through the pages of her novel. "Did you have fun?"

"Nah. It's such a drag having to hang out with that old man. He's nice but he never stops talking." He took off his coats and tossed them onto a chair, kicking off his heavy boots and thick socks. "Annoying, having to wear all this fancy shit too."

"Trust me, I know." She shifted over in the bed so he had more space to lay himself down, kicking out his legs and crossing his ankles. "Do you know what's on the agenda for tomorrow?"

He nodded, tilting his head ever so slightly to the side to peek at her face. His eyes slid down to the novel turned over in her hands and smirked, "Yeah. You've got book club. Have fun with that." She tossed her book back on the table beside her and instead curled further into the blankets.

His eyes caught hers and he smiled, one of those undeniably handsome intoxicating smiles she loved so deeply. "You know, you look kinda cute like that."

"Huh?"

He shrugged, "All curled up under the blankets like a little baby. It's cute. I'm just calling it how I see it."

If she wasn't flustered before, she definitely was now. He was undeniably making her feel some sort of way, and she was loving the attention. He was being so bold, so unlike him. She questioned what had compelled him to act like this, to say such things. They weren't in character anymore, it wasn't like he had to say these things.

"Thanks, Shika." She felt dumb but what was she supposed to say? She was overwhelmed. "But we're alone now. You don't have to act all lovey-dovey."

He crossed his arms beneath his head and sighed, eyes gazing up at the canopy. He mumbled, just loud enough to reach her ears, “When this is all over, I’m gonna miss you being my princess.” She peered over at him in the candlelit room, making out his faint silhouette in the darkness. Her heart fluttered in her chest at his sweet words. She never imagined in a million years Shikamaru would say these things to her, and now that it was happening she didn’t know how to react.

She dreamed of this moment for a while now. The thoughts of Shikamaru confessing his feelings and then her falling into his arms dramatically. It was a fantasy of hers, a guilty pleasure. Far too dramatic to ever be a reality.

That's why she was too shocked to meet his eyes. His princess. Those words made her woozy.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're not stupid. You know what I'm talking about," he said calmly.

"You don't want things to go back to normal?" Y/N asked, hesitant. She felt nervous, diving into these waters. Each words felt like it held so much weight. It was a puzzle, just finding the right thing to say, how to reply to his statement. "Just friends, like before?"

"Is that what you want?"

And when she really thought about it, he was right. She didn't want to go back to normal. She wanted to continue holding his hand, kissing his cheek and his lips, loving each other with their words and their gazes and all the little touches. She wanted all of this to last and as the mission came to a close, she found herself worrying for the future empty of all those things.

She shook her head, just barely able to bring her eyes up to meet his. He looked bored, but she knew he cared. He cared a lot, actually. "I-I think I'd like if we could stay like this."

"Falling in love with you, Y/N, was one of the easiest things I've ever done. Finding the right time to tell you, that's been troublesome," he confessed, blowing a stray piece of hair from his eyes. "You never seemed emotionally available, really."

"I always was. I was always waiting for you, Shikamaru. Ever since we were just teenagers, I've been waiting for you," she told him, letting her heart finally come out with her words. "I just thought you wanted to be friends. Before this mission, I had completely given up on being with you, but then everything seemed to fall into place on this trip."

"When Kakashi told us we would be married for this mission, I have to admit, I got excited." He rolled onto his side to face her. She was still curled up in her blanket, and he felt like he was melting. The most beautiful woman in the entire world right in front of him, his heart playing right into her hands. He was okay with that. He was okay with this girl having his entire soul if that meant he would see that smile and those eyes peering up at him.

He wasn't a romantic man. Far from it. But she brought out a side of him he'd only heard about from love struck novelists, such kinds Kakashi sensei would read.

"I just knew I'd have to shoot my shot with you," he finished, sending a wink her way. She truly was swoon, like putty in his hands. Her words came faster than she could think to stop them.

"Shikamaru, I think I love you. When you kissed me for the first time, I knew it was true. All these feelings for the past few years weren’t in vain. I love you."

"The feeling is mutual."

The girl crawled out from under the blankets and over to him on the other side of the mattress. Her arms wound around his neck and as best she could, she curled into his chest. Her ear pressed to his heart, beating loud and constant in her mind. He was more than happy to let her cuddle up to him, in fact, he relished in the feeling.

This is what he'd been missing out on all this time. The hugs. The cuddles. The looks in the dark full of love and longing. It was nice, to lay there with someone he knew for sure, without any doubt, loved him to the moon and back. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her tighter to his tired form, letting her sink further into his touch.

Kakashi knew what he was doing sending them. Two lovers with a mask over their emotions, straight into a game full of dancing around their feelings and pretending to be something they always wanted to be. Everything played out perfectly, a happy ending for a couple of worthy shinobi.

He was happy. That's all he could ask for.

[otptings]

You Deserve It

slightly Tsundere!Taeyong

-angst (argument) , smut ( head f receiving, face fucking, emotional sex, unprotected (please wrap it before you tap it)talking during sex) 

angry/makeup sex loosely based off of this post, 

“I fucking hate you.” I stared at Taeyong, eyes filled with tears. I can’t even remember how this argument started. Same argument, different day. I’ve never said I hate you before, but all of my emotions came boiling over and I need him to feel my pain. He’s just been so nonchalant about everything recently. 

We weren’t always like this. The constant arguments, and crying. Screaming at each other for hours on end, until he walked out of the apartment. Stale mates for days until we made up or had another argument, and the cycle repeated. It was tiring and I was tired of not knowing the person who I went to bed with every night. 

Our relationship started off so sweetly. He confessed to me during our 3rd date. I remember the sun was so bright in the sky, beaming down on us. We were at a beautiful restaurant sitting on their terrace enjoying the warm weather. Taeyong was nervous, he complimented about 10 times while handing me the beautiful bouquet. I remember my face burning constantly because he was so sweet. The way he held every door open for me, and pulled the chair out for me. We laughed for hours over our food, just enjoying each others company. How he stopped eating and started up a whole speech just to confess to me.

 He wasn’t truly my type. At least that’s what I thought so. My past relationships spoke for themselves, all of them being rude, cocky assholes. However, the boy with the pink hair who couldn’t meet my eyes caught my heart. 

I couldn’t help but accept his confession. He was so incredibly sweet, and extremely attractive I’d have been stupid to reject him. He was a gentleman in every sense of the word. Our relationship was perfect or so I thought.

 I’d sneak into the music building to bring him coffee, we’d talk in the studio as he excitedly showed me his beats, and lyrics that he was working on. Sometimes I’d walk in on him and his friends as they were recording, and would hear how as soon as he stepped into the booth he exuded confidence. Every time I walked into the studio he would look up at me, his eyes bright and doey as he made eye contact with me. A smile blooming over his face, as he came to me and pulled me into his arms. Always placing a kiss on my right then left cheek in that order. 

He’d come to the library if I forgot to answer his texts. He’d always bring me a fruit smoothie because he knew that I couldn’t have caffeine. Sometimes he’d bring the smoothie along with food, or a snack because he knows that I tend to forget my meals. He’d made some noise before he approached me because he knew that I was jumpy when I was focused. Sitting down beside me he’d wrap his around me. Telling me jokes causing me to cover my mouth to hold in my laugh. Once we even got kicked out of the library because Taeyong kept on telling me telling cheesy pickup lines, and I couldn’t help but laugh.

I don’t know how our relationship became this way. I don’t know what I did to make him stop caring, or when he stopped caring. If I could’ve even stopped it from happening.

“Bedroom now.” I wanted to fight him. Tell him that I refused to listen to him if he didn’t care about our relationship. The other part of me, a different part of my brain knew that this was potentially the last time. The last time of me feeling his love, even if it isn’t truly his love. 

Walking to the bedroom I took a glance behind me to see that Taeyong was staring at me. His eyes were full of fire, and I quickly opened the bedroom door and closed it behind me. I didn’t know what he wanted me to do besides this so I just sat on our bed. 

Looking at the night stand I saw the picture of me and Taeyong from one of our last dates. Before we became like this at least. We were at the amusement park for my birthday trip. His arm is wrapped around my waist, and my arms are thrown around his neck. I have a big smile on my face as I look at the camera, and Taeyong was staring at me. Love shining in his eyes. I wiped the tears away  and looked at the door right when Taeyong walked on.

Any sadness I felt was gone. The tension in the room became incredibly thick. Taeyong pulled his shirt over his head, before making his way over the bed. Grabbing my neck Taeyong pushed me back on the bed, placing my head below where our pillows were. 

Without even talking Taeyong pulled my shorts and panties down in one go, tossing them across the room. Taeyong glared at me, a silent warning to not move, before releasing my neck and spreading my legs.

Taeyong got closer to my pussy, letting his breath ghost over it but didn't make any move. I whined and reached for his hair, but he smacked my hand away. “Don’t touch me.” Contradicting himself he instantly attached himself to my clit. Sucking on my clit causing me to let out a loud moan. I prayed that my neighbors weren’t home. 

Taeyong lightly bit my clit causing me to hiss from the pain, before running his tongue over it. Taeyong’s tongue moved lower, yet never stopped moving or even slowed. Swirling in and around my hole I couldn’t even begin to contain any of my moans. 

“Fuck Taeyong please.” I didn’t even know what I was begging for. I just felt overwhelmed not having him touch me for months, to suddenly him teasing me, constantly moving between my hole and my clit, giving them both equal attention. I didn’t know if it was because of how aroused I was or because of Taeyong’s spit (both) but I could feel myself dripping.

Without warning Taeyong inserted two of his fingers into my pussy as he sucked on my clit. I moaned as I reached for the pillows behind my head, desperate for something to hold on to. Out of reflex I felt my hips lift off of the bed, but Taeyong took his hand that was holding my thigh and pinned my hips down. 

I felt the fire in my stomach start to grow intensely  when Taeyong suddenly pulled away. His fingers never stopped moving, as he stared up at me. Anger and lust present in his eyes. Taeyong’s glare had me so overwhelmed that I came with a loud moan. 

Taeyong never still didn’t stop moving his fingers, continuing his ministrations helping me ride out of my orgasm. As I finally started to come down, I could feel the overstimulation setting in when he finally pulled his fingers out. Tapping them against my lip I opened my mouth. Sucking off all of essence from his fingers, I swirled my tongue around them making eye contact with him. Tae whispered a fuck before pulling his fingers out.

Taeyong quickly took off his sweatpants, before changing our positions so he was laying down and I was in between his legs. Taeyong was pretty in this position.  Looking down at me, hand gripping my hair as he held his tip to my lips. He was incredibly hard, his tip flushed red from the adrenaline of our argument still flowing through him. 

“Open up. Time to put your pretty mouth to good use.” Opening my mouth I made my jaw relax and let him use my throat. His thrust started off slow, but soon he quickened his past. I breathed out through my noise, feeling the tears coming to my eyes. Drool came out of my mouth every time he thrusted him, and I could feel him hit in the back of my throat. I held my thumb in my fist tightly, trying to keep my gag reflex at bay. 

Taeyong slowed his thrust and grabbed me by my throat again pulling me towards him. I straddled his lap when he grabbed my face and caressed it softly, looking in his eyes I saw that the anger had died down. For the first time in weeks he kissed me.

Our lips move in sync. I felt the tears streaming down my face, knowing that this was going to the last time. The last time we kissed, the last time we have sex, the last time I held him in my arms. Pulling away from the kiss Taeyong grabbed my face with both of his hands and wiped away my tears. “Baby I'm so sorry.” 

Taeyong started peppering kisses over my face, I felt my heart swell with joy. It’s been so long since he’s treated me like this, as if he cared that it only made me cry harder. “I’ve been so stressed out with everything recently that I’ve been taking it out on you. I’m sorry I never meant to treat you like that, and I know it doesn’t make up for my behavior but I’m gonna try so hard. I’m gonna treat you the way that you deserve, I love you so much.” Taeyong kissed me on my lips again. I felt butterflies in my stomach, even after 3 years, and this near breakup he still makes me feel the same way.

“I love you, I'm so sorry I don't hate you. I just wanted to make you feel my pain.” 

“You have nothing to apologize for, I'm so sorry. Can I show you that I'm sorry?” Nodding my head Taeyong held me up by my hip, and held his dick so that I could lower myself down on him. 

After not having him for months, the stretch was almost too much. After I got halfway down I laid my head on his shoulder. “You’re doing so good baby.” Taeyong suddenly thrust up causing me to wrap my arms around his shoulders and dig my nails in his back. I whispered a quiet fuck as he apologized before thrusting up in me again. This time the pain lessened and I could only feel pleasure. Holding onto his shoulders I slowly started riding him. Swirling my hips occasionally to get friction on my clit.

Taeyong’s grip on my hips tightened and we made eye contact as I rode him. My breathy moans with his low groans filled the room along with the sound of skin on skin. I clenched around him causing him to let out a loud fuck, and I did it again to tease him. 

Taeyong flipped out positions making sure that my head was resting against the pillows before he slid back in. My legs over his biceps as he held onto my wrist and thrust into me slowly. From this position he was hitting deeper then he was while I was riding him. I could feel his cock dragging against my walls better and I felt my head slowly start to get floaty. The only thing on my mind as he quickened his thrusts was him. 

“Fuck baby you feel so good. It’s been so long.” I nodded my head,

“Too long I missed you.” Taeyong moved his grip to my thighs pushing them further down so that I was almost bent in half. His thrusts slowed down again, but he made sure that every thrust was powerful and hit deeper than the last. I felt him rub against my sweet spot with every thrust. Him pulling out until only the tip was inside before he thrusting so deeply that I could almost feel him hit my cervix.

“I’m so sorry, I love you.” Leaning down to me, Taeyong met my lips again and started to jack rabbit into me. Every time he hit deeper, and his hips meant mine as he thrust. I could feel the fire in my stomach growing at a quicker rate. Along with his steady pace I knew that I was going to cum soon. Grabbing his hand I intertwined our fingers, feeling the knot getting tighter and tighter.

“Fuck I'm gonna cum,” I felt tears coming out of my eyes, the feeling of him consistently hitting my spot along with my previous orgasm had my eyes closing him from the please.

“Cum for me baby.” His free hand reached down to rub my clit, and I felt my orgasm hit me full force. My eyes closed as I came with Taeyong's name on my lip. Taeyong continued to thrust helping me ride out my orgasm, before I felt his thrust stutter, and felt him coming inside of me. I felt his warm come fill me up as I felt my self go in and out of consciousness. 

I flinched awake when I felt a warm rag rub over my face, and pussy (in that exact order). Opening my eyes I saw Taeyong look apologetic as he cleaned me up, and threw the rag on the floor before climbing into bed beside me. Pulling the covers over the both of us Taeyong pulled me into his arms so my head was resting on his chest, and our legs were intertwined. I listened to the beat of his heart as I lulled off to sleep. The last thing I heard was Tae promising me.

“I promise I'm going to give you the world. You deserve it.”

[writseo]

Nathan Prescott | I Can’t Believe My Heart

Word Count: 1.3K 

Tagging: @sacredwarrior88​

Warnings: None

I’ve been taught, I’ve learned the hard way that life and love are never just. 

“Are you okay?” 

You were walking by the trail of lockers, right next to Stella. It had only been a few days since your ex had broken it off with you. You didn’t really like the relationship too much, but it still felt like home. It was filled with security, or at least you thought so. When he tore off the band-aid, confessed how his attraction had died down so drastically for you over the years, you swore to yourself to never go back. To never go back to such a vulnerable place only to let someone take a hit to beat you down. Last night, you had been crying yourself in your pillow for the third time that day. Now, you were numb. Afraid, but mainly numb and just wanted to isolate yourself in your dorm. 

“Are you okay?” You looked towards Stella.

“Yeah, I just need a bit of time to gather myself.” 

That was 8 months ago. Despite the fact that the wounds were just finally healing, the pain still lingered like a bruise. The wounds were okay when untouched but once it was pressed, it ached. 

You were sitting in your desk, waiting for Jefferson to continue on with his lesson and tell you about the project that he had set up for all of you. 

“You will be assigned a partner and an artist. I want you to both work together to try to replicate this historical figure’s work, through a pair of camera lenses, do you all understand?” Some groans and low “Yeah”s filled the room, “Okay, I have a list set up.”

As Jefferson walked over to his desk, you noticed some giggling from the side of the room. Looking over, you spotted a certain teen, speaking to the other students with a similar jacket to his. You didn’t really like him, in fact, you thought he was a bit annoying. Nathan had always been a constant distraction in the classroom. You couldn’t stand him though, you just wanted to pass the class and yet he would somehow make it harder, even though he never really spoke to you directly nor did he probably even know your name. Jefferson reached back to the center of the room, pushing Nathan out of the conversation he had with his friends. 

“Victoria and Taylor, Joseph Nicéphore Niépce… Nathan and (Y/N), Alfred Steiglitz…” Your mind trailed off. You already worked with his people like him before. It wouldn’t be a surprise if he left the whole project for you to do. You looked over to Nathan, seeing him tilt his head. It wasn’t like he was familiar to your name. You were rarely called on, barely spoke to him either. You wished it was the same for you. 

And if you trust, you're just one of the fools.

After several classes of trying your best to get the perfect shot, the one that would end up skyrocketing your grade, you and Nathan had seemed to get… closer. As you worked to get the different angles right, the two of you would make small chats. And when it became darker, so did the small conversations that took place. One minute, it went from living in Arcadia Bay to how his father expects so much from him. You didn’t expect it though. You had always been taught to believe that Nathan Prescott was just another… well, Prescott. You forgot how he was still a person though, with feelings, who suffered from rumours more than anyone else did. The annoyance in your head would soon change towards your stomach, then to butterflies. At first, you thought it was because of the sudden attention. No one listened or looked at you as much as he did, especially in such a tedious manner. You thought that maybe it was just nerves, until you started noticing his fluffy hair. And his blue, sparkling eyes. Or perhaps the way he would always be playing with his fingers in such a tense way. 

“What are you looking at?” He snapped at you from the park’s bench. You were trying to capture a melancholic picture, though your camera was facing towards the streets and your eyes were in a different direction, eyeing a different picture. Even though you had grew a slight friendship with the boy, it never stopped him from giving you the sass that helped entertain you. 

“Nothing, sorry,” You said, shyly. You then went back to your camera, and continued on with your efforts. 

Pull it together, you thought, you already have enough shit going on. Don’t add onto it with this, again. 

And now I can’t believe my heart, is saying I don’t resist him 

Somehow, in his little sociopathic heart, he felt a bit of guilt. All the work was laid on you, Nathan had nothing to take part in it. The least he could do was take you to get some lunch, or even dinner. 

“They have the best pancakes,” Nathan claimed, enthusiastically as he held open the door for you. Even though you felt irritated in a small sense, your heart still jumped when you felt his gaze on your back as you entered the restaurant. 

“Where do you want to sit?” 

“Anywhere.” 

When you made your way to the booth that was all the way in the back, you felt his hand graze against your body. You didn’t want the shiver to pass through your spine. But you did, and you felt how intoxicating the boy was. For a moment, you almost paused. At least until the hand retreated back and you began to miss the sweet feeling. 

Later that night, you would be on your bed, curled up into a little ball, crying your eyes out. You played this game too many times. You couldn’t play it again. 

That I've been on my guard too long.

Even though you wanted nothing more than to be separated from him, that didn’t stop the small happiness from slipping through you when he would come closer. When the project ended and you both had already finished it up, you felt excited when you found him making his way towards you. Nathan didn’t really have a purpose, none that you know of. So it made you smile when you found that he liked you enough to hang out with you willingly. 

Once the class had ended, you found the man making his way towards your table. You pretended to be busy, putting away books and rummaging through your bag so you wouldn’t have to make eye contact. 

“(Y/N)?” you looked up, “Can we meet up at the lighthouse? I want to show you something.”

You nodded and mumbled a small “sure.” Giving you a quick small smile, he walked back off. 

I can't believe my heart~

You walked up the hill, following the signs. It was almost night, stars were beginning to shine. The bench that usually laid empty was occupied by a familiar full head of hair. He then turned around and glanced at you. He stood up and walked himself towards you. With each stride, your heart began to pound louder and louder. You managed to take out a leg and made your way towards Nate.  

“You are here,” he said. You nodded. 

“In the flesh.”

“I want to ask you something,” he nipped at his lips and scratched his top of his head with his left hand. 

“Is everything okay?” You were concerned, especially when he started fidgeting with his hands a bit. 

“I was thinking that we should go out sometime, like as a date?” Nathan looked at you, waiting for your response as a light blush took over his cheeks. 

~Surrendered when I kissed him.

“Sure, why not?” 

[imagineyourworld]

Omg request for tbb echo with 4 and c from the prompt list??

Hey,

Since I said in my original post that the requests should be either a letter or a number, I'm gonna go ahead and just do 4, I hope that's alright with you.

Love, Charlie

-------

Echo x Genderneutral!Reader

Warnings: Mention of death, sickness (nothing serious)

4. Mutual pining

-------

You still couldn't wrap your head around the fact that the man next to you was Echo. The very same Echo who had first come into the diner you worked at almost two years ago with his brother and had come back whenever he could ever since. Until one day he didn't. That day it was just Fives, an unusual sight without his twin, who sat in the corner occasionally sipping his caf and clearly wishing it were something stronger. During your break you had sat down in his booth and he had told you the news that broke your heart. It wasn't until that moment that you realized you had fallen in love with Echo, and now it was too late. Only it wasn't too late, because exactly one month ago the man you thought you had lost forever walked into the diner, missing a few limbs but still with the same gentle smile on his face. Echo had been nervous to tell you who he really was and what had happened, but he should have known that there was no need. You were as accepting and loving as always and when you wrapped your arms around him and pulled him tight Echo could have sworn he really died and had gone to heaven. Heaven, however, wasn't where he was right now, rather his own special hell. Here he was, in his usual booth with his usual drink and usual meal in front of him, but there was one thing missing: you. Someone else had served him, someone who didn't know his order by heart and didn't smile at him the way you did. It took him a while to muster up the courage to ask your colleague where you were, after all he wasn't your boyfriend, he wasn't even really your friend, there had never been any indication that you wanted to continue your relationship outside of work, a thought Echo continued to push deep down and ignore. "They're sick", the other waitress told him. The news hit Echo deep. Of course the rational part of him knew that you might just have a common cold or a headache, but for clones being sick more often than not meant dying. He called out a quick "Thanks" to the waitress before throwing a handful of credits on the table and hurrying out of the diner. He considered himself lucky because he knew where you lived from the few times he had convinced you to let him walk you home after work, so know he was running towards your flat, ignoring the pain where his prosthetics met his body. You were the only thought on his mind.

-------

You hated being sick. Hated it more than anything. Well, almost anything. The one thing you hated more than being sick in general was being sick today. You knew that this was the day Echo would visit the diner before leaving Coruscant again and you wanted to be there more than anything. After losing him once you simply couldn't risk not saying goodbye. Your doorbell interrupted your anxious thoughts. Hesitantly you walked over to the door and pressed the speaker button. "Who's there?", you asked. "It's me, Echo", a familiar voice replied. "Can I come up?" The sound of his voice alone managed to make you feel better, and when you saw him walking up the last couple of stairs from your spot in the doorway you could have sworn your cold was almost gone. "Hi", you said. Even your voice suddenly sounded less scratchy. Echo took a step towards you. He lifted his arm as if to touch you, only to realize that it was his cybernetic one. Quickly he lowered it again. He kept forgetting about his new limbs, especially in your presence, but he refused to touch you with anything other than his real hand, refused to miss the chance to feel your skin against his. "I heard you were sick and I... Maybe this is stupid, but I just had to see you, cyare." There it was, that nickname he had begun calling you shortly before the mission to the Citadel. You were dying to know what it meant, but too afraid to ask, maybe it was something cute and romantic, as you hoped, but maybe it was something like "buddy" or "pal", which you really couldn't take, it would ruin the last bit of hope you had of Echo reciprocation your feelings. "That's so sweet of you, but I really don't want you to get sick as well", you said, even though the thought of him leaving made you feel ten times worse again. Echo just shook his head as he gently pushed past you into the flat, as if to show you that he didn't plan on leaving any time soon. "I won't get sick, trust me. And if I do anyways I guess I'll just have to stay here with you", Echo told you with a slight smile. You laugh at his words, a laugh that quickly turned into a series of coughs. You really liked this new side of Echo, the more confident and bolder side, though of course you were also fond of his sweet and caring side. "I'd really like that", you said, heat risking to your cheeks at your words. Echo looked at you in surprise. Surely you couldn't mean that, it had to be the sickness talking. But he couldn't ignore the little spark of hope that ignited at your words. "How about I make you a cup of tea and you sit down with a blanket?", he suggested. With another cough you moved over to your couch and began to wrap yourself in your comfiest blanket while Echo made his way to what he assumed to be the kitchen. "Or maybe two blanket", he called once he heard you sneezing from the other room.

-------

Just a few minutes later the two of you were sitting beside each other on the couch, you wrapped up in three blankets and Echo without a single one. "Aren't you cold?", you asked him, both because you were concerned and because you sensed what might be your one chance to get close to him. Echo looked at you, a fond expression on his face as he smooth your hair down. "I'm fine, don't worry about me." You looked at him from beneath your slowly closing eyelids. "I always worry about you, I always have. When you're gone I can't sleep because I keep wondering whether you're alright. I can't help but worry that something might happen, that you'll get captured again or die, really die." His expression changed from loving to shocked. You worried about him? Really worried to the point where you couldn't sleep? Was that a friendship thing or did it mean...? "Echo, I'm still cold", you said with a yawn that quickly turned into another cough. That short sentence quickly pulled him out of his spiraling thoughts. He jumped up from the couch and started to look around the room, keeping his eyes out for any more blankets. "Are there more blankets somewhere?" You shook your head as best as you could with shivers now taking over your body. "Cuddle with me", you managed to say. "Body heat helps." Echo tried to ignore the blood he felt rushing into his cheeks and his thoughts telling him that he should just do it, when would he ever get this chance again? "Are you sure? I don't think I make a good cuddling partner with my new limbs and-" "I don't care, just get in here", you interrupted him, your sickness making you moodier than usual. For a moment Echo just stared at you, then the desire to finally be close to you after all these years of longing for exactly that took over. He sat back down on the couch, closer this time, and moved underneath the blankets.  You were hot, literally. Echo was sure you had a fever, and he told you as much. But when he tried to get up again to look for a thermometer you put your arm around his waist and laid your head on his shoulder. Gently he rested his arm, the prosthetic one, on the back of the couch, so the cold metal wouldn’t be in the way, and then he was finally able to relax and enjoy your touch. Enjoy the warmth of your body, the feeling of your breath hitting his throat and the smell of your shampoo, that made its way into his nose.  “We should have done this earlier”, you sighed as you snuggled even closer.  You really didn’t know what Echo had been so worried about, he was more than comfortable and so, so warm. His warmth alone made you more relaxed and sleepy than you already were, though his comforting presence and the soft circles he was stroking along your legs, which had found their way into his lap, helped as well.  “All you had to do was ask, I would have been ready any time”, Echo confessed. He was sure you could hear his heart beating from how close you were, maybe feel it as well, but at least you couldn’t see the colour rising to his cheeks.  “Really?”  You lifted your head from its place on Echo’s shoulder to look at him. He was even more beautiful from up close. With how the light was hitting his eyes just right and the slight colour on his cheeks he looked like a painting, a masterpiece you might see in a museum.  “Really.”  Echo couldn’t help but stare at you. Your eyes were bright, though that may be partly due to the fever, your lips shining and your breath smelled of the tea he had made earlier. He moved his arm from the back of the couch to your shoulder and went to cup your cheek in his hand, only to realize that he had once again used his prosthetic.  “Stars, I’m still not used to that thing. I’m so sorry”, he apologized when he saw you flinch.  Your gaze left Echo’s eyes and focused on his arm instead. There was no fear or disgust in your expression, no pity either, just plain curiosity.  “It’s fine, I was just surprised by how cold it is. But I love it. I love it because it’s part of you and I love every part of you.”  Did you really just say that? Surely Echo had to be dreaming. Any second now he’d wake up to hear his brother’s cursing or complaining about something. Or he’d be back in that hellhole on Skako Minor and realize that not only was this a dream, his rescue had been one as well. But even though he was sure this couldn’t be real, he had to ask.  “You love me?”  Now it was your turn to be shocked. You looked back at Echo’s face, moving your head so fast it made you dizzy. The reaction you had feared was nowhere to be found, instead love and longing were written all over his face.  “Did I just say that out loud?”  Echo nodded, there was nothing else he could do in that moment.  “Damn, this cold must be hitting me harder than I thought”, you mumbled, hoping to get out of this situation by reminding Echo that you were sick.  But no such luck. His hand, the flesh one this time, moved from your thigh up to your waist to pull you even closer. He leaned down to rest his forehead against yours before he whispered the next words.  “(Y/N), please be honest; do you love me?”  How could you ever lie to him? But any words seemed to have left you, so instead you leaned up to close the last few centimeters between your lips.  The kiss was everything you had hoped it would be, everything you had dreamed of these last two years. Sweet and loving and longing, with just a hint of something more, something rougher and more urgent.  To your dismay Echo parted from you sooner than you would have liked.  “You didn’t answer my question.”  You sighed. There was no escaping, not this time. “Yes, I love you. I only realized it when it was too late, or when I thought it was too late, and then you came back, but I didn’t want to burden you with this, not after everything you’ve been through, so I-”  Before you could say anything else Echo interrupted you by pressing his lips against yours again. His hand was stroking along your waist while his scomp was pulling you closer by your neck. Your own hands found their way to his shoulders, and you clung to them to keep you upright. Now it wasn’t just the fever that was making you dizzy.  “I love you too”, Echo told you between two kisses.  He attached his mouth to yours again before he began trailing kisses all over your face and down your neck.  “I think I fell in love with you the moment I first saw you.”  Your eyes widened in surprise. How could he have known all this time and never tell you? Before you could even ask that question out loud he already gave you an answer.  “I was so scared to tell you. I’m just a clone and you’re... you’re perfect. Fives kept telling me to ask you out, but I just couldn’t. On the way to the CItadel he finally convinced me to give it a shot, but you know how that went.”  His words made your stomach turn. You had been so close, so incredibly close, to a happy ending.  “And then I came back and you were still there and still as perfect as ever. If I couldn’t tell you how I felt before, it was even more impossible now. I wasn’t even just a clone anymore, I was less, not even really human.”  Those last words broke your heart. Did Echo really think that’s how you saw him? As some machine? Is that how he saw himself?  “Echo, my love, my darling, I would never think that, and you shouldn’t either. You’ve never been just a clone, you’ve always been Echo. And you’re still Echo, my Echo who I love so very much. It doesn’t matter that your body has changed, your mind and your heart are still the same, that’s what makes you you, that’s why I love you.”  Echo could have sworn that he never loved you more than he did in that moment, not even that one time when you told someone off because they said something mean about clones.  “I... Thank you”, he said and ended his sentences with the sweetest kiss to you cheek.  You wanted to tell him that there was no need to thank you, but all of the sudden the cold took over your body again and your eyes felt heavier than ever before. Echo seemed to notice, because he loosened his grip on you and guided your head back to his shoulder.  “Sleep now, we have all the time in the world tomorrow.”  And sleep you did, in Echo’s arms, snuggled up under a blanket, hoping to wake up next to him after all this wasted time. 

-------

I hope you liked this fic and are alright with the prompt choice I made. I kinda feel like this was more of a friends to lovers/mutual pining story, but it’s just a narrow line between the two that I have trouble writing one without the other...

[redhoodieone]

Wrong Number Part 2

A/N: Here’s Part 2! Uh…I don’t really know what to say other than…enjoy it! Hopefully, I can post Part 3 sometime next week.

Warnings: Language, Sexual Content, Text Message Nudes, and Mutual Masturbation.

I’m in complete shock. I know I’m frozen because I can’t literally take my eyes off the text message Jason sent to me. It’s clear; it’s in black and white, staring right at me.

Do you ever think we’ll meet each other?

He wants to meet me. Jason wants to meet me in person!

I want to text him back, but my mind is full of many ridiculous questions and the fears of Jason being a serial killer, or rapist, or just an insane Arkham escapee blows up in my head.

Before I knew it, I see the three bubbles on my screen.

I’m sorry. That was selfish of me to ask you that even though we’re still practically strangers to each other. Forget I asked, please?

My heart suddenly hurts like fuck. The pain I’m instantly feeling is very familiar. A broken heart?

It’s pure agony when I notice Jason texting me again.

I’m not going to be able to text tonight, sweetheart. I’m working late with my brothers. I’ll text you tomorrow. Have a good night. Sweet dreams.

I can’t believe I did this. How could I do this to a guy who’s been so funny, so sweet, and such a good friend in only just four days through text messages?

I seriously fucked up. And now I have no one to talk to until I fall asleep.

And as strange as it is, I only sleep well after I talk to him.

 ————————————————————————------------------------------

And true to his word, Jason texts me at five in the morning, only to let me know he made it home safe after working with his brothers.

We only spoke about our jobs once. He told me he works alongside police officers and tracks down criminals and helps brings justice to the city. He seemed almost hesitant to tell me and turned the conversation to me as if he doesn’t like talking about work. He made it clear that he would rather keep his work private, and I didn’t push him to tell me more. I didn’t want to ask a lot of questions, even if I’m sometimes curious about it, because I wouldn’t want to make him uncomfortable about it.

I had told him I’m a waitress at the local diner just a block away from GCPD, and how I’m a late-night writer who dreams of publishing my novel on love and loss. And after I confessed about the book I wrote to Jason, I noticed he was very enthusiastic about that and even told me he wants to read it.

And as the shy and insecure person that I am, I became embarrassed and said no.

That only fueled the fire between us. Jason went on to explain he loves to read. His favorite literature consists of Shakespeare (particularly Hamlet), George Orwell’s 1984 and Animal Farm, and even poetry from Edgar Allen Poe.

He even went into depth of how The Tell-Tale Heart mirrors his own reflection of life and stuck with him during a depressing time in his life.

It wasn’t until after we shared our love for literature that I found myself falling for Jason. As ridiculous and insane as that sounds, I couldn’t help but feel as if he’s the missing piece in my life.

It’s as if he’s the words to my story.

Important, but very valuable to a writer.

I was basically on a high that had me grinning like an idiot, giggling like a moron, and jumping in my seat as my stomach twists and turns like a roller coaster, when Jason refused to take no for an answer after I said he couldn’t read my novel. He even said his dad has connections to businesses in Gotham and could even help me get it published.

As much as I would want that, I couldn’t help but feel that it seems too good to be true. What if his dad took my novel and publish it as his own? What if I get cheated out of a contract and didn’t get paid fairly like I should? What if it’s basically a soul-sucking scam to just fuck my entire life up?

Jason must have sensed my hesitation after that, because he then began to tell me about his brothers.

How his older brother Dick still treats him like a kid, even though Jason is taller and stronger than him.

How his younger brother Tim is a computer nerd and often geeks out over the oddest things.

And how his youngest brother Damian is really a demon spawn, who tries to be tough shit, but is really a soft teddy bear.

He even has a sassy but wise butler, Alfred, who frightens him and sometimes reminds him of Vito Corleone from The Godfather. But the older man loves Jason as much as his dad, Bruce.

The stories about Jason’s family are the best. I always find myself excited to see what he texts me about his family.

How he and his brothers fight over their dad’s car, how they wrestle and spar to see who’s the strongest one, and how whenever one’s in trouble, the other three are already finding ways to save or bail the troubled one out.

It all makes me feel good to know they’re a close family. Especially when my cold, harsh reality reminds me I don’t have a family.

My parents died when I was just fifteen years old. I was in the school library alone during afterhours; reading on a beanbag chair because I didn’t want to go home. At that particular time, my parents were hanging around a different crowd. A crowd that was into drugs and gambling, and possibly other illegal activities I don’t even know about.

So, I chose to stay in the school library that night, sitting in my favorite beanbag chair the librarian allows me to use, reading a favorite horror book, munching away on a hot pocket (a snack also from the librarian), and just enjoy the silence but comfortable environment I would call home.

Then I was told they died in a car accident, but after eavesdropping on Commissioner Gordon and the other cops, I heard there could have been a hit on them.

The car accident happened only a block away from our apartment.

The brakes were cut.

The car was burning too much oil.

The airbags were taken out.

Many noticeable factors couldn’t pinpoint the real crime. Eventually, they just called it a “car accident”, and everything fishy about the case was ignored and never brought up again.

I suffered and struggled a lot in foster homes until I turned 18. I didn’t have any other family members to get into contact with, so I had to make do with the foster care system. After being shipped to three unstable and cruel homes, the last family only dealt with me until I turned 18 and I was soon kicked out. I did get lucky enough to get a job at the diner I’m working at since the new manager needed a pretty young girl to serve the customers.

I even went to Gotham Community College for a year but dropped out when I couldn’t pass any math and science classes.

It was fucking hard.

Science was confusing as hell.

Math was just evil and useless.

I hated those classes so much.

I only passed my English classes because reading and writing only made sense to me.

I even took a creative writing class and poetry class only to discover I want to write.

I want to be a writer.

So, I dropped out of college and decided to work full time at the diner as a waitress. Since no one wants to live and work in Gotham, I’m lucky enough to work morning and night without any issues. As dangerous and scary Gotham can be, I have nowhere else to go, so that’s why I stay here.

Maybe that’s why I’m eager to meet Jason. After everything I’ve been through, maybe I do need a little unpredictability.

Chances.

Risks.

The more I consider meeting Jason, the more I can imagine him being my family.

Or being a part of his.

Maybe.

 ————————————————————————--------------------------------

“You’re not going to meet him, right???” Stacey raises her voice at me in sheer annoyance and panic. She crosses her arms and glares at me to answer her. “Right, Y/N???”

I sigh as softly as I can while wiping down the booths and tables for the night. In the midst of a battle, I find myself growling with irritation when I can’t wipe away the sticky maple syrup spills on the hard surface.

“He could be a fat, old man who picks up on teenage girls! He’s probably some 40-year-old loser who still lives on his mom’s basement playing Street Fighter with kids! What if he tricks you into meeting up in a hotel room and has his way with you? Then what, Y/N?! Does that sound like a good idea to you?!” Stacey snaps.

I exhale deeply and stand up straight; after leaning over the table to reach the opposite side for some time. Turning around, I face Stacey Patterson, a tall, petite, pretty blonde, fresh face girl straight out of high school. She’s a waitress like me, and after only working here for a year, we’ve become close friends; always looking after each other in dangerous Gotham City.

“I didn’t say I was going to meet him, Stacey. We’re just talking about it,” I answer timidly.

Despite being five years older than Stacey, she still intimidates the hell out of me. Whether it’s her 5’11 height, loud voice, or natural evil glare, I can never speak up or defend myself. No matter how hard I try, I just can’t take a stand.

Because what if I actually piss her off? What if she stops being my friend?

Because I don’t think I could live in Gotham and not have any friends and not know anyone.

Stacey is like my best friend, and her friends Amber and Holly hang out in our group. Stacey even says they’re my friends, too, even though I clearly know they only put up with me because of her.

And if Amber and Holly aren’t my friends, then I’ll just have Stacey. And if I don’t have Stacey, I’ll only have Jason.

And who knows if Jason is who he says he is, and if he’s even real.

“Don’t give me that bullshit, Y/N! You’re totally thinking about Jason! You’re thinking about meeting up with him because I could see it in your eyes!” Stacey declares. She waves her arms around to emphasize her point. “You like this guy! You have feelings for a guy you’ve never even met!”

“That is not true,” I argue weakly.

“Yes, it is! And we don’t even know if it’s a guy!”

“Jason is a guy, and I can tell!”

“Oh, really? How? Do tell.”

I stare at Stacey with a serious expression, except my cheeks are burning with embarrassment as usual. “He...comes off like a guy. I know he is. I can tell through his text messages,” I say.

“Anybody can sound like anyone through text messages. That’s how people catfish victims online!” Stacey argues.

“I’m a writer, Stacey. I just...have a feeling, okay? I know Jason says who he is, and I believe him,” I say strongly, as I push a lose strand of my hair behind my ear. “I’m doing this the smart way, too. When he and I decide when we should meet up, I’ll let you know. Maybe we can make it a group thing. I bring a friend. He brings a friend.”

Stacey sighs in defeat when she realizes I’m not backing down. She glances up at me with a stern face. “Fine. When you two decide when you’re both going to meet up, I’ll be there. I’ll be there to make sure he’s not on America’s Most Wanted, and to make sure he doesn’t try to lure you to his mom’s basement. BUT...you have to go on a date. A REAL date with a guy we both know, AND who could be good for you,” she states loudly and clearly.

“But Stacey-”

“Hey! Only until this Jason guy comes to Gotham and we meet him! Until then, I want you to give this guy a chance. A fair chance! For me...please???” Stacey pleads. She pouts and gives me her puppy dog eyes, which she knows I always give in to.

I’m too nice. Mom always said I was too nice, and that one day it’ll get me in trouble.

I’m still wondering when that’ll happen.

“Okay, I’ll give this guy a chance. I swear I will,” I promise and salute her. “But who’s the guy?”

Stacey grins in success and hugs me tightly. “Good! Because you’re like my sister, Y/N, and I just want to see you happy. You deserve it,” she says softly. “And it’s Chace. Remember him? He’s the drummer from, WakeHell. He moved in right next door to me, and I know you two will hit it off right!”

Chace????

Oh yeah. I know him.

He’s a total bad boy. A bad boy I don’t even think I could deal with.

I force a smile but then frown, because the only guy in my life who makes me happy is Jason.

Who I only text.

Who I haven’t even met.

 ————————————————————————---------------------------------

The next day is a lazy day since it’s my day off. I spent the majority of it sleeping, doing laundry, and just doing minor cleaning around my apartment until it’s 9:00 P.M.

And Cruel Intentions is on TV.

Lying on the couch with my second glass of Vodka Cranberry, I find myself really buzzed and horny. Ryan Phillippe back then was hot, and him making out with Reese Witherspoon is doing things to me.

My phone bings. It’s Jason.

What are you up to tonight, sweetheart?

Just a night in, a cup of glasses of vodka and cranberry, and Cruel Intentions is on TV.

I barely realize I’m buzzed and texting Jason. But my horny side doesn’t care.

I sorry I’m buzzed right now lol.

LOL no worries. I just came back from the bar with my brothers. We had a successful night and decided to get some drinks. We even had Tim and Damian use fake I.D’s.

I laugh and snort. Thank God no one heard me do that.

That’s good...we wouldn’t want Tim and Damian to be left out. They’re your baby brothers, Jay.

Jay? I really like it when you call me that. And I especially like you buzzed. LOL.

I like me buzzed too! I think I’m way more fun and free!

LOL!!! Exactly, princess!

I smile down at my phone. I love it when he calls me princess.

You said you’re watching Cruel Intentions? I just found it on TV. Wow...this movie’s old LOL.

Shut up!!! I find young Ryan Phillppe sexy in this movie!

You seriously find him sexy??? The guy’s a whiny brat! A pussy! Fuck, this movie woulda been sexier if we actually saw the douchebag eat out Cecile and saw him fuck Annette AND Kathryn!

I gasp out loud and giggle.

Then it would have been a porno! Not a movie! Hahaha!!!!

That’s fine with me, princess!

I softly whimper at just the thought of Jason watching porn. Closing my eyes, I imagine how he would sound, touch himself, and look when he’s pleasuring himself.

My eyes shoot open when I hear Sebastian telling Cecile he wants to kiss her…down there. I quickly turn my attention to the TV and watch the movie. Even though he takes advantage of a clueless, drunk girl in the movie, just the thought of him eating her out makes me clench my thighs.

It’s been too long. WAY TOO LONG!

The last guy I was seeing didn’t like to eat me out; claimed it was disgusting and unnecessary to do before sex.

As if sucking his dick was glamorous AND fun!

My thoughts are interrupted when Jason texts me.

You’re quiet tonight…does this scene turn you on???

The laughing emojis he texts me should hurt my feelings since I can easily be embarrassed over sexual things but…he’s right.

I’m turned on with just the thought of getting eaten out.

I boldly text Jack back. Unashamed and VERY buzzed.

You have no idea. Just imagining him eating me out, writing the alphabet with his tongue, and making me have an explosion is making me wet my panties right now.

I laugh to myself just seeing that Jason read my text message and is responding fast. The texting bubbles have never looked so good.

You’re…you’re wet right now????

Yes. Soooo fucking wet.

A surge of drunken confidence hits me, and I quickly shove off my pajama shorts until they’re on the floor. In just my white tank top and pink panties, I bravely slip my fingers into my damp panties and rub the wetness against my sensitive clit.

And with my other hand, I raise my cell phone and snap a picture of fingers in my wet panties.

And I send the picture to Jason.

I bite my lip in anticipation when I see he read my text message and saw my picture. The texting bubbles do not appear on the screen. He’s not texting me back.

Frowning, I wonder if I freaked Jason out. Maybe I crossed the line. Maybe I made him uncomfortable. Maybe I’m just not sexy.

Suddenly, my phone beeps. Unlocking my cell phone screen, I see two text messages AND a picture.

Oh, fuck sweetheart…that’s fucking sexy. You’re fucking sexy…

Jason sends me a picture of him wearing his boxer briefs, and his hand holding his hard, thick cock, showing me the outline and shape of his boner.

Delicious. I can feel my pussy clench just from imagining Jason fucking me with his cock.

Fuck doll...you’re doing this to me.

I whimper pathetically and can’t help but continue to rub my clit and respond back. I can see my juices staining my panties.

Are you touching yourself too?

Fuck yeah. Just seeing your fingers playing with your wet, pretty pussy got me hard. I’m jacking off to your picture.

Would you want me like I want you?

Fuck yes, sweetheart. I probably want you more than you want me.

I slip a finger inside my pussy and moan. My thumb runs fast hard circles on my clit, and I’m soon pushing in two fingers. I’m fucking myself crazy, but I imagine Jason is finger fucking me because my fingers wouldn’t get me off so fast.

And his fingers are thick. His hands are fucking huge!

I bite my bottom lip. “Fuck...I can’t believe I’m going to do this,” I whisper to myself. I snap another picture of my fingers shoved in my pussy, and how I’ve gotten wetter. I send him the picture with the truth.

I need to cum so bad. I wish it was you touching me.

Yeah? What would you want me to do to you, doll?

Fuck that picture’s so hot.

I’d want you to finger me. Eat me out. Fuck me hard.

Jason sends me another picture of him stroking his cock but with his hand in his underwear. I can see a wet spot where his tip is; stained with his precum. I want a taste of it so badly.

Fuck I would baby. Your pussy looks so good enough to eat. I’d fucking eat you out until you can’t cum anymore. I bet you taste delicious.

Oh fuck…I’m so close. I want your cock so bad, Jay. You’re gonna make me cum…

Rub your clit harder baby. Fuck your pussy fast and hard with your fingers. Imagine they’re my fingers, baby. I’d fuck you so hard and deep. 

I want to see your cum, okay? Take a picture of that pretty pussy and show me what I did to you.

I do what Jason says. Behind his words, I can feel his authority. Even though I can’t hear Jason’s voice, just reading his words makes me burst like fireworks. My thumb rubs my clit harder, and I crook my fingers just right until I push against my g-spot until I cum. My orgasm is intense, and I force myself to snap a picture of my soaked underwear and fingers. I sent it to him with a lazy smile.

My phone beeps. Jason sent me a picture of his thick, juicy, cum covering his abdominal muscles. I smile a little with pride. 

Fuck that was hot, sweetheart. I needed that. 

Me too. Now, I’m sleepy. 

LOL, I’m tired too. Get some sleep, okay? We’ll talk in the morning.  

Okay…goodnight Jay.  

I roll over onto my side and shut off the TV. Pulling my UGG throw blanket over my body, I snuggle up to fall asleep. My phone beeps again. Opening one eye, I reach over to read the text message. 

Goodnight doll. Sweet dreams.  

[imagineaworlds]

I Love You (Part Twenty-Two) -- Aaron Hotchner

Written By: @desperately-bisexual​

Request: None.

Warnings: Cursing. Mentions of smut. Mentions of Dom/sub relationship. Talk of murder, kidnapping, shooting-- literally everything Criminal Minds.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Greenaway!Reader

Word Count: 14289

Timeline: A month after part twenty-one.

When we got back from the case we had just finished, Hotch and I decided to stop at a diner for dinner. I wasn’t necessarily hungry— especially after that case—but Hotch put the option out there, which meant that he was probably hungry, so I accepted for his sake. I could afford to snack on something, I supposed. But, really, how was I supposed to eat anything after that confession? I mean, Morgan practically ran out of the interrogation room to go throw up in the bathroom. None of us expected what Floyd Feylinn was going to admit to. We thought that, if anything, he was going to tell us that he ate Tracy Lambert, and we were going to call it a day. I don’t think any of us stopped to consider that everyone at the search party two days prior had unknowingly consumed Tracy’s remains in the chili he made. Our team hadn’t taken the offer of anyone’s home cooked meal because we were too busy trying to organize the search and build the profile. It was a good thing that we hadn’t. Despite not actually eating anything, though, I could tell that none of us were too keen on the idea of eating— which was why I was so shocked when Hotch offered. Maybe a milkshake or something wouldn’t hurt. I mean, it was cold that time of year, but a milkshake never killed anyone… Geez. Even thinking about it made me sick to my stomach.

At the diner, there were only a few other couples occupying some of the booths, but since it was so late, most of the dinner rush was gone. Hotch and I could pick anywhere to sit, so he took my hand, and he led me over to a booth away from the window, somewhat towards the back of the dining area. He let go of my hand when we arrived at the seat he wanted. We both sat down simultaneously, scooching into the middle of the booths until we were comfortable. Hotch picked up his menu and started skimming. I picked up my menu, but I hid my face behind it so that he couldn’t see how disinterested I was.

Nothing looked good. Nothing sounded good. All I could think about was that chili and the way he laughed when he told us the truth. He didn’t care that he did that to all those people. He didn’t care that he did that to Tracey Lambert. He was a monster. The worst of the worst. And his wicked laugh was still ringing in my ears. I almost wished that Morgan and Hotch would’ve let the preacher strangle Feylinn then and there. He deserved it, didn’t he?

I put my menu down and sighed quietly, just thinking about how I was ready to go home. I was fine with not eating. I wanted to just lay down in his arms. I wanted to feel how his chest moved slowly against my back every time he breathed, and I wanted to feel how his strong, long arms would hold me tight, and how his breath would be hot on my ear, and how he would take random moments to kiss me. I needed simple. I needed him. I needed home.

Hotch finally looked up at me, reading my face. No. Profiling all of me. I looked up at him and did the same. Neither of us seemed happy or hungry. I originally thought that he wanted dinner, which was why he offered it; but I started realizing that he probably thought that I wanted dinner. It was clear that neither of us wanted to be there. What was the point of staying and spending money on a meal that we weren’t going to eat?

“Do you want to get out of here?” he finally asked me. I nodded immediately. He dug into his pocket, fishing out a ten dollar bill as an apology tip for ditching the waitress, then he reached across the table to take my hand. We both stood simultaneously, and he started pulling me towards the door. When we got settled in the car, Hotch leaned over the armrest between us, grabbed my chin between his fingers, making me look at him, and said, “You know what sounds nice?” I shook my head slightly while still being held by him. “Hot chocolate, blankets, and a movie.”

I hummed an agreement before leaning in to kiss him. After he pecked my lips a few times, he settled in his seat to face forward while starting the car. It wasn’t a long drive home from where we were, but Hotch seemed insistent on holding my hand in his lap while his thumb drew circled around my knuckles. His touch was so relaxing to the point I nearly fell asleep in the car, actually. I had been staring out the window, looking up at the sky and the stars that were above, and we were listening to quiet music over the radio. Together, his touch, the sky, the music, it all gave me a chance to forget for a moment just how horrible that case was. I knew that Morgan probably wasn’t taking it as well, since it had been personal for him, for some reason. But I couldn’t even take a moment to ponder his behavior while I was practically falling backwards into tranquility.

When I was little, Elle used to tell me that we would all turn into stars when we died. Now, of course, I knew that was a lie; but for the longest time, thinking that there was some other physical form waiting for us after life brought me comfort. When the world was quiet and life was peaceful, it was nice to think about that. Even now, I liked to think that Elle’s dad was up there in the sky, watching her and protecting her since I couldn’t. It made me feel better sometimes to think that there were people up there who could watch over me, my family, and my friends. When I couldn’t be there to protect people like Jack and Elle, maybe there was someone out there who was doing it for me.

At home, Hotch waited for me to walk around the car and meet me on the path in front of the house. After noticing how he was holding his hand out for me again, I balanced all of my things in my less dominant hand and intertwined my free fingers with his. As we walked up to the house, Hotch kissed my knuckles again. He had an obsession, I was convinced. I didn’t mind, however. I liked the comfort it brought me. I liked that it was a gentle, caring touch that silently told me that he loved me.

“You sure you’re okay?” I asked him.

He nodded.

Hotch put his go-bag down so that he could open the door while still holding my hand. I thought about how Hotch was either going to just tear my clothes off and cuddle me or he’d actually give me the chance to get changed. I really wanted to go upstairs and throw on one of Hotch’s old sweatshirts and a pair of sweatpants to go with it. His obsession was kissing my knuckles all the time, and mine was wearing his clothes around. It was nice.

The door opened and Hotch led me inside. We put our go-bags down on the floor and I sighed. “I’ll make the hot chocolate if you pick the movie.” He agreed by grabbing my hips and pulling me in for a passionate kiss that I had to push him away from before we could lose our breaths. “Pick a movie that we’ll actually end up watching.”

“What if I just pick one that we’ve already seen, that way it doesn’t matter if we miss some of it.” He grinned widely in response to the way I squinted at him. “Fine,” he threw his hands up in surrender. “As you wish.”

After I winked at him, I went to the kitchen. I sighed again as I grabbed two mugs from the cupboard, then two of the instant hot chocolate packets from the box next to the fridge. I turned on the electric tea kettle before leaning back against the kitchen island.

It was late, and I was somewhat tired, but a movie and a night with Hotch was the perfect way to wind down. In the morning, we’d probably call Haley to see if we could have Jack for a few days, and she’d probably say yes. She was good to us like that. She knew that with our unreliable schedules, every moment with Jack was practically borrowed time. She wanted to make sure that Jack got to see his dad as much as possible, and if that included giving him up and taking him in on random days without warning, then she was going to make it work. I liked that about her. It made her strong. It made her a good role model for Jack. It made her a good mom. In a way, I kind of envied her, actually. She had years with Hotch, and she had this connection with Jack that I would never have or be able to understand. If Hotch and I ever had kids, I just hoped that Haley would still be understanding with us. I somewhat hoped that she would actually be able to help. Her and Jessica were practically there at our every beck and call— which was a horrible way to put it, honestly… But I always wondered how they could do it. If Hotch and I got serious like that, I hoped that she could help me understand how to navigate it all.

When the water was hot, I poured equal amounts of water into our two mugs, then sifted in the hot chocolate powder. Hotch liked his hot chocolate scalding, unlike me. If it were too hot, I couldn’t drink it until it was practically room temperature. The way to find the right heat after practically boiling was to throw in a hidden ice cube with the marshmallows. Perfection.

I stepped back into the living room, carefully juggling the mugs while making sure that none of the marshmallows would hop out over the edge. “Alright, one order of hot chocolate for you— hold the ice cubes— and one hot chocolate for me with extra marshmallows and an ice cube.” I slowed my speed as I noticed that Hotch was getting off the phone. I prayed that it wasn’t work. We had just gotten back from that case, and I wasn’t too excited about jumping back into a new case yet. I just wanted to have a night to ourselves for once…

Hotch sniffled away a cry before turning to me with red eyes.

“Aaron?” I questioned worriedly, racing to put the mugs down. “Baby, what is it?” I sat down next to him and ran my fingers through his hair.

He cleared his throat as he found the bravery to say what was on his mind. “Penelope…” He hesitated. He never called her Penelope. Ever. More importantly, however, was the question running through my mind of why was he talking about her right now? What happened while I was gone in the kitchen? “She was shot,” he finally answered the question running through my mind before I could even ask.

I stopped petting his hair for a moment. “What are you talking about?”

“She’s on her way to St. Sebastian’s right now.”

“I—” I hesitated as I pushed myself to my feet, feeling how my head started spinning and my knees felt weak.

Garcia… How did this happen? Why her? When? Of all people, Garcia didn’t deserve to be hurt. Ever. She was the most innocent, precious being I had ever met. She would never hurt a soul. Why would someone shoot her? Our Penelope Garcia. This all felt so unfair. It all felt unreal. We needed to do something. We needed to be there for her. We needed the team to find out what happened—

Morgan.

Hotch reached out for my hand as I tried to stumble onto my feet. “I need to call Morgan,” I croaked, escaping Hotch’s grasp so that I could search for my phone. “Emily, JJ, and Reid went out for drinks, I think. You could, uh…” I brought my free palm up to my forehead while searching for Morgan’s number in my phone. “You can… You can call them—”

“Y/N,” he tried to catch my attention.

I brought the phone to my ear and listened as it rang a few times. Hotch was still trying to make me pay attention to him, but I had my back turned to him, my eyes trained on the floor, my hearing focused precisely on waiting to hear Morgan’s voice. How was I supposed to tell him this? Garcia meant the world to him. I knew that no matter how close Morgan and I would ever be, his connection with Garcia would remain ten times that. That was fine by me. I loved Morgan, and I loved Garcia. Morgan was my partner in the field, and my best friend in the entire world, if we were being honest. Having to tell him that the most important woman in his life had just been shot… It reminded me of when I got that call from Hotch after Elle was shot by Randall Garner.

Morgan and I had similar coping mechanisms. We connected through our traumatic pasts, and we grew close because of how we dealt with it, and how our platonic chemistry made us special. It was fine to work with him, to tease him, to have his back. But it was also a comfort to know that he was always there, no matter what. I knew that he would always understand me, and I would always understand him. When I found out about Elle, I practically shut down until I could hold someone I loved— Hotch, specifically— in my arms; at which point, I broke into pieces. I didn’t understand why it happened. Why Elle? Why us? I remembered feeling so desperate for answers, but there was nothing I could do. When Morgan would inevitably find out about Garcia, I knew that he would have the same reaction. I knew that this call was going to shut him down, turn him into a zombie of worry. I knew that he wouldn’t feel anything until he got to hold someone close, and then all of the questions and desperation would flood in. Why Penelope? Why us? Yet, no one would have any answers.

Morgan’s phone went straight to voicemail.

I cursed under my breath and tried again. Hotch stood from the couch, realizing that he wasn’t going to get me to talk to him yet. My mind was too far into thinking about Elle, Garcia, and Morgan to talk about if I was alright or not. I’d be fine when Garcia was okay. I’d be fine when Morgan would finally just pick up the damn phone. Maybe then I’d be willing to talk about how my head was spinning and I was fearing the worst. But until then, I just needed Hotch to call the rest of the team so that they could meet us at the hospital.

“Reid, Emily, and JJ are going to sober up and catch a taxi to the hospital,” Hotch said quietly from behind me.

I slowly turned on my heels, threw my arms up slightly on my sides in defeat, then whispered, “Morgan isn’t picking up.”

Hotch finally reached out to put a hand on my hip and practically drag me over to him. I reluctantly let him pull me, my feet stumbling under my mindless steps. His fingers dug into my hip slightly. When Elle was shot, Hotch immediately pulled me into a hug, even though our relationship had just gone public (unwillingly), and Gideon wasn’t too happy about it all. But Hotch still did it. He did it because he loved me, and he wanted to comfort a family member who had been put in harm’s way because of the job. But now we had another family member in the hospital, and neither of us were sure what to do. There shouldn’t have been a difference between Elle and Garcia, but there was, somehow. Hotch was paralyzed this time with me. He didn’t know what to do or what to say. But being able to touch me, to hold me, to grab me like he was on my hip, it brought him enough comfort to let his mind sort out all of his racing thoughts.

When we got home from the Feylinn case, we did what we normally did: tried to relax. Home was where we felt safe. Virginia and D.C. were supposed to feel safe, if we really wanted to broaden the area, but… Garcia was home. Garcia was in D.C. and she was hurt when she let her guard down, too. Why? Why couldn’t our team ever catch a break? Why did it seem like the world was always working against us? Why did the world have to go after the most innocent out of all of us?

“There are moments like this…” he whispered, “where I… I just don’t know what to say.” His other hand shook as he brought it to my hand and squeezed. “I—” he hesitated again. His eyes softened before he pressed his forehead to mine. “I love you.”

My free hand wrapped around his bicep. “She’s going to be okay.”

Hotch was always the one to give that reassurance, even if it was sometimes false. But there were times when someone just needed to hold him and tell him that it was going to be alright. With all of the burdens he carried around every day, there probably weren’t even a handful of instances where someone was able to ease his suffering. There were a million times where Hotch put everyone else before himself, but who else was there but me who could recognize his pain in his actions and his voice and understand that he needed comfort, even if he wasn’t going to admit it. Hotch was a stubborn man who had troubles with expressing how he really felt. It took him a long time to accept that it’s important to tell his loved ones every day how much they meant to him because time with them was never guaranteed, but he still struggled to come to terms with everything else. Confessing that he was worried about Garcia wasn’t going to happen, but I knew what he was thinking without him having to say it. I always knew it.

I kissed the end of his nose since our foreheads were still pressed together. “I love you, Aaron.”

Hotch’s hold on my hip tightened like he couldn’t find a better way to express how grateful he was for me. I understood the feeling. Sometimes there weren’t enough words— sometimes the words didn’t exist. “I love you” was a strong affirmation, but even then, it didn’t really convey what we meant. For me, at least, there was this strong urge in the pit of my stomach to constantly be by his side. It felt like this pull towards him that I could never ignore, no matter how hard I tried. That urge in return made his touches electric against my skin, which only made me yearn for him more. I felt like no matter how many times I could touch him or kiss him or tell him that I love him, it was never enough. Sometimes I asked myself if Hotch felt the same way, but then we’d have moments like this, and I knew that he actually felt it twice as hard, yet it pained him that he couldn’t show it as much.

“I’m worried about her, too…” I finally flung my arms around his neck and hugged him. His arms snaked around my waist and he pulled me as close to him as he possibly could. That urge had returned, and it wasn’t going away, especially not now. There was a tug in my heart when he kissed my neck. “Aaron.” I played with the ends of his hair. “Listen to me.” He nodded somewhat against my shoulder. “It’ll be alright. She’s at the hospital. She’ll be okay. I swear it. It’s okay to break, if you need to.” He shook his head. “Okay.” I knew that it wasn’t my place to push him. “I’m going to keep calling Morgan until he finally picks up.”

“We should go to the hospital,” he insisted, trying to part from our hug, but I held on tight.

“I love you, Aaron.” I wasn’t sure why the sudden urge to tell him that washed over me, but it did. We should have been spending all of our time and energy worrying about Garcia, of course, but there was a part of me that needed to stop and appreciate Hotch for a moment.

“I love you, too, Y/N.”

As we pulled up to the hospital, Hotch and I practically jumped out of the car before it was even off. We ran inside, racing around to find the emergency room. St. Sebastian was a huge hospital—bigger than the one that Elle had been taken to when she was shot. It was the hospital closest to our house, which was nice for getting there as soon as possible in situations like this, but finding anything or anyone within it was damn near impossible. You could ask twenty people where something was, and they wouldn’t even know, or they’d keep sending you around the hospital to find someone who did know because they were too scared to admit that they didn’t know.

Hotch searched around frantically, trying to find someone who could help. I turned to my left to look towards the O.R. and spotted a bloodied paramedic walking towards us. My brows furrowed and I ran up to him.

“’Scuse me,” I stopped him in his tracks. He looked up at me with shocked eyes. “Did you just bring in a gunshot victim?”

The paramedic glanced over his shoulder briefly. “I can’t disclose that information—”

“FBI,” Hotch said, flashing his credentials. “I’m her supervisor. What happened?”

The paramedic sighed. “It’s not looking good, if I’m being honest. We got her here just before she bled out, and the wound on her shoulder won’t stop bleeding. We can’t get the slug out until we get the bleeding under control— if we get the bleeding under control.”

I put my palm over my mouth to cover my shock and turned away from them. This wasn’t happening. This wasn’t real. It was like finding out about Elle all over again, only this time there was no reassurance that everything was going to be okay. Instead, we were hit with the worst kind of odds. I hated it. I hated the asshole who did this to Garcia, and I hoped that he would eventually suffer for what he had done. It didn’t matter who he was. He shot an FBI tech analyst— he shot our family; and we weren’t going to just let that slide.

“I’ve gotta go,” the EMT insisted before running past myself and Hotch.

I heard Hotch step away from the hallway, probably to go think to himself. I didn’t blame him. We both needed some space— just for a moment, nothing too serious. My mind was wrapped around Garcia, Morgan, and Elle all at once. This was going to kill Morgan. I mean, rip his heart out of his chest, kill him. How was I supposed to tell him the truth? Maybe it was a good thing that he wasn’t picking up the phone.

I felt a comforting hand grab my shoulder, then the next thing I knew, Hotch was spinning me around and pulling me into his arms. My fingers curled around the back of his suit jacket. “I just talked to the local PD,” he whispered. I pulled back slightly to look at him. “They think it was a botched robbery.” I put my head back on his chest. “There aren’t any leads. As soon as the team gets here, I’ll head there to see how I can help.”

“No—” I begged. I didn’t want him to go anywhere.

This was all too similar to the Fisher King, and I wasn’t sure if I could survive it on my own. I needed Hotch there as a reassurance that he was safe. If he left, I wouldn’t be able to protect him. We were already one teammate short; I didn’t need Hotch to end up in the hospital, too. Even if this were just a one off, robbery gone wrong case, I couldn’t risk it. I couldn’t lose him when things were falling apart.

“Hotch!” Reid called out from the elevator. We tore ourselves off of each other and looked down the hallway to see Reid, JJ, and Emily all running towards us. “Any news?”

“She’s still in surgery. We won’t know anything for another few hours.”

My eyes snapped to Hotch’s cheek, trying to understand why the hell he was holding back on telling them the whole truth. Garcia wasn’t doing well. Things weren’t looking good. The team deserved to know the truth, to prepare for the worst, didn’t they?

“Any word from Morgan?” Emily asked.

I shook my head. “I’ve been calling and calling, to no avail.”

“I’ll try for a bit, just to give you a break.”

“Thanks,” I croaked, smiling shortly.

“Let’s take a seat in the waiting room maybe?” Emily offered up to everyone.

We all silently nodded and followed her to the waiting room just down the hallway. On our way, we saw Rossi come out of the elevator next. He went directly to Hotch for answers while the rest of us went to sit down. Emily and JJ took a seat beside each other, working on trying to get ahold of Morgan, and Reid sat across from them, just watching and listening. I saw on the opposite side of the room, right next to the window. I looked out and up. I took notice of the stars again, thinking about how they were luminating the night just a little dimmer now. It almost felt like they were waiting for a new bright star to join them, and I prayed that it wouldn’t be Garcia. We weren’t ready to lose her yet. The sky wasn’t ready for her.

Hotch and Rossi came in a few minutes later, refusing to take a seat. They stood in their own corner, still whispering between each other. They liked to whisper. The two of them were thick as thieves, and I knew that was bad news for me. I mean, I liked that Rossi and I could exchange stories about Hotch, and it made him red with embarrassment and anger. But I also liked how they were just two friends who had been reunited after years apart, and they had so much to discuss. I didn’t mind that they whispered about things. I especially didn’t mind that they whispered about me. But in times like these, when we were all searching for answers and comfort, their whispers seemed unsettling.

Morgan came running out of the elevator, eyes searching down both ends of the hallway to see if he could spot us. When he found us, he stopped for a moment to register that this was really happening. I stood from my seat and let him stare at me for a moment as he still tried to understand. When I found out about Elle, I felt paralyzed for the longest time. Even when racing around the hospital, I remembered not being able to think about anything. I couldn’t even remember how I got from the parking lot where Hotch gave me the call to the hospital where he held me in his arms. But once I had him, once I heard him tell me that everything was going to be alright, I knew that I was going to be fine. Morgan needed that same comfort. He knew it.

His arms opened slightly as he started running up to me. I caught him in a tight hug, letting him hide his face in the crook of my neck. He was taller than me, but he was fine with leaning down to nuzzle slightly. I told him what he needed to hear, that he was okay, she was going to be okay, and that it was going to be okay.

“Are there any leads?” Morgan asked, forcing himself out of our embrace. He looked over my shoulder for a response from Hotch. There was silence, which meant that Hotch probably told him the truth: we knew absolutely nothing. “Is she going to be alright?”

“The nurses said that we could be hearing from the doctors any minute now,” Hotch answered.

“Speaking of which,” JJ said, nodding to the door.

A surgeon walked in just on time. He was still in his scrubs, his mask on his chin, his cap still tied to his head. We all stood at attention for him, and I grabbed Morgan’s hand while preparing for the worst. He looked around at all of us, taking in our worry, debating on how he should proceed. I wished that he would just spit it out. It was either good or bad news. Just rip the fucking band aid off. Please.

“She’s alive,” he finally admitted. Everyone sighed with relief. Morgan dropped my hand so that he could wipe his face with his palms. “She was shot in the lower shoulder, and the bullet ricocheted into her abdomen, but we were able to stop the bleeding, seal up the wounds, and make sure that there was no damage from the internal bleeding.”

“Will she be okay?” Morgan asked.

The doctor nodded. “Yeah. She’ll be able to leave the hospital in a few days. She’s still in a medically induced coma, but you’ll be able to see her in the morning.”

“Thank you, doctor,” Hotch said with a forced smile, his arms still crossed over his chest. 

He nodded politely with the smallest of sealed lip smiles before leaving the waiting room. We all turned to Hotch. The room felt so much lighter now. With relief having washed over us, we could focus on the next part of all of this: finding the son of a bitch who shot Penelope Garcia. We were ready to work.

“You should all stay here for when she wakes up,” Hotch began, taking note of how we were all waiting for our assignments. “I’ll go with Dave to the crime scene. The lead detective on the case doesn’t think there’ll be anything to find, but we’re still going to try. I don’t care about protocol; I don’t care about whether or not we have new cases to work on. We’re not doing anything until we solve this.”

Everyone agreed silently, taking their seats again in the break room. Rossi gestured to Hotch, and they made a step towards the exit, but I caught Hotch’s sleeve first. He turned slightly to look at me. I know I appeared desperate, my pleading eyes trying to make him stay. We didn’t know if this was a robbery, or a target on Garcia, or a target on the team. He could have potentially been putting himself in harm’s way by leaving the hospital. I didn’t want him to be the next person brought in on a stretcher.

“I’ll be back before you know it,” he whispered, pressing his palm to my cheek. I lovingly nuzzled against his touch. “Morgan needs you.”

“I know. But I need you.”

“You were the one who told me that it would be alright. Do you still believe that?” he asked while tilting his head. I nodded. “Okay. Keep that faith. It’ll be alright. I love you.”

I kissed his palm before taking his hand in mine, then kissing his knuckles. He loved doing that with me, and I was simply curious as to why. I realized that it was so… intimate. So special. It was one thing to kiss someone on their lips, cheeks, neck, face, body; but kissing their knuckles was so humbling in the oddest of ways. It actually made me feel closer to him.

Hotch’s thumb caressed my hand lightly before he carefully pulled away and went with Rossi. He seemed driven, like he was trying to stop himself from coming back and staying with me. Honestly, I wasn’t going to stop him from doing either. I wanted him to stay, but I also wanted him to find who did this. I was just… confused. He probably was, too. I saw how broken he was back at the house, and now he had to bottle all of that up for the team. I couldn’t begin to imagine what it would be like in his position. It was easy for any of us to break, but Hotch always seemed like an immovable, emotionless force at work. While I obviously knew that wasn’t the truth, and I knew that he was suffering inside every time something happened to our team or every time we had a case with kids; no one else knew the truth. I had to share the burden of his silent struggle. I could see with my own eyes that it was killing him, yet no one else, even with all of their profiling skills, could seem to figure it out. To them, Hotch was an enigma, and they were fine with not solving him.

I sighed quietly to myself as I sat down next to Morgan. His head was in his hands, his elbows propped up on his knees. Just as I expected, he was a mess. He had probably put his emotions on pause while racing to the hospital, then when he finally saw that this was all really happening, he didn’t know how to cope. Garcia was his everything. He couldn’t bear to lose her in the way that I couldn’t bear to lose him.

“I miss Elle every day,” I spoke up in a hushed tone. Morgan did move or say anything. “I don’t think Hotch knows how painful it is to go through every second of every day knowing that he was the last person she spoke to before disappearing. He doesn’t tell me anything about her leaving and I don’t ask, but… I still think about her all the time.” I leaned back slightly. “Tonight, when we got home from the Feylinn case, we were in the car, and I looked up at the stars, and I thought about her again. For the first time in decades, I was reminded of a tale she told me where we all turn into stars when we die. I actually thought to myself that we have all of our loved ones up there, looking after us, protecting us, and I thought that nothing bad could happen. And then we got the call… No one was looking after Garcia, no one was protecting her. Something terrible happened and we weren’t there to stop it. I hate Elle for putting that dumb star idea in my head, but even more so because I thought I was over it, and the one time I stop to think that maybe she was right, the whole world seems to come crashing down.”

“Y/N…” he croaked quietly. “I can’t lose her.”

“I know.” I linked my arm with his slowly, somewhat forcing him out of the hunched position he was in. “But they said that she’s going to be fine.”

“I feel like this is my fault,” he finally admitted.

“You can’t believe that—”

“I do. After Feylinn, I’ve been thinking long and hard about God and religion… I prayed for the first time last night, Y/N. For the first time since my dad made me when I was a little kid. What are the odds that I do that, and it ends with Penelope on the table?”

“Derek,” I whispered, snaking my hand down to intertwine our fingers, “this is not your fault. I need you to hear me. No one could have stopped this.”

“I could’ve!” he said a little too loudly. “If I didn’t make her mad, she wouldn’t have blown me off, and I would have been there to save her!”

“Shh…” I cooed, squeezing his hand. I rested my cheek on his shoulder. “I promise it’s not your fault. The guy who did this is the only one responsible.”

“When am I supposed to start believing that?”

I paused and thought for a beat. “When we catch him.”

The sun started peeking over the buildings outside of the hospital when a nurse approached us. The stars that had been taunting us all night were finally gone, and so was the fear that Garcia would be joining them. There was another wave of relief in the room when the nurse came to collect us. We were all eager to see Garcia and to make sure that she was alright.

“Hi, my loves,” Garcia cooed before any of us could say anything. JJ walked up and took her hand. “No tears…” She reached up and wiped JJ’s cheek with her thumb. “I’m glad you guys are here. Thank you.”

We all smiled lightly at her. Her voice was so quiet and raspy, not at all like the Penelope Garcia we knew. Usually, she was loud, bubbly, and optimistic, but the surgery and the drugs had worn her down. I didn’t blame her for not being normal Penelope. In fact, I was glad that she was getting a break for once. After what happened, she just needed to rest. We would ask for our Garcia back when she was better.

“How are you feeling?” Morgan asked worriedly.

Garcia nodded vaguely. “I’m okay. I mean, I’ve been better… but… I’ll be okay.”

I hesitated as I looked around the room. I knew that we needed to ask her about the incident and about the Unsub in order to help Hotch and Rossi at the crime scene, but I didn’t want to push her either. There was a chance that she couldn’t be ready to talk about it, or maybe she couldn’t even remember anything. Either way, we needed to try. As much as it pained me to do it, I had to ask as quickly as possible.

I stepped forward slightly. “Are you up for answering some questions?” Garcia looked at me and nodded again. “Do you remember what happened?”

She cleared her throat, then said, “Yeah… I…” She chuckled to herself shortly. “I never saw it coming. He seemed so… nice.”

“You know him?”

“Mhm.” She looked up at Morgan, “You were right. I should have trusted my gut. I knew that there was something wrong about that guy from the coffee shop, but I just couldn’t put my finger on it, so I tried to ignore it. I just wanted to believe that he was into me.”

“What happened, Garcia?”

“He was dropping me off at home after our date. We were standing just outside, and he went to kiss me… I thought… I thought he was just nervous when he walked away suddenly. And then he turned around, and he shot me.”

“Do you have any idea why he would have done this?” Emily inquired.

“No. I just thought he liked me.”

“Do you have a name?” I asked, taking control of the situation again.

Garcia hesitated. After a moment of looking around at all of us, she nodded, a tear falling down her cheek. “James Colby Baylor.”

As I made eye contact with Morgan, I grabbed my phone from my back pocket. “I’ll call Hotch to let him know.” I stepped out of Garcia’s hospital room and quietly entered the hallway. I leaned up against the wall and dialed Hotch’s number quickly, praying that he would pick up. I didn’t want to chase him around like I had to with Morgan, and I didn’t want to worry about him like I was with Garcia. Thankfully, though, Hotch answered the phone fairly fast. “Hotch?”

“Yeah?”

“We’ve got an I.D. on the guy. He went on a date with her, then when he went to wish her goodnight at her place, he shot her.”

Hotch sighed on the other end. “Makes sense. We weren’t sure why he did it in the courtyard, but that answers that. There’s not much else to find here, unfortunately. He used a revolver, so there’s no—”

“No bullet casing for evidence,” I finished, my shoulders falling in defeat. “If he’s smart enough to clean the crime scene, then the name he gave her is probably just an alias.”

“I know. I’m going to get in contact with another tech analyst back at the office and see if they can start digging around. Send me the name Garcia gave you. For now, just stay at the hospital with Garcia and Morgan. They both need you.”

Someone tapped my shoulder from behind me. I turned, the phone still pressed to my ear, to find that it was Reid. He whispered that Garcia wanted to see me and Morgan, but I shook my head at him. “I’ve gotta go, Hotch.” I hung up the call before he could say anything else and dug it into my pocket. “I can’t go back in there, Reid,” I told him quietly. He cocked a brow. “It reminds me too much of Elle.”

Reid’s face softened. “You know, I heard what you told Morgan last night about the stars…” I bit the inside of my cheek and turned my gaze to the floor. Of course, of all people, the great Dr. Spencer Reid had to hear me talking about stars and afterlife. He was probably preparing himself to give me a whole speech about what actually happens to us when we die and the science of stars and whatnot— “I liked it.”

My attention snapped back up to him. “What?”

“I mean, it’s not realistic, and I think we all know that, but… in times like these, when we need a little hope, it’s nice to hear. So, I just… I wanted to thank you.”

“Reid—” I didn’t know what to say.

The two of us were never close, which was why we never really talked or paired up in the field. It was always me and Morgan— and sometimes Emily— against the world. Reid did his own smart thing elsewhere while we went to go talk to witnesses or look at crime scenes. The two of us never sat around to get to know one another, but we never even got a chance to talk like this, which was so weird considering how I did still consider him as family. Our family included everyone on the team, even the people I didn’t get to chat with too often, like Reid and JJ. Their pain, what they were going through right now, was just as valid as the rest of us. Hell, they had been on the team longer than me, so of course it mattered. I was glad that I could help Reid somehow, even though I didn’t initially realize that was the case.

“I’ll stay with Morgan while they talk,” Reid offered, changing the subject quickly.

“Thank you, Reid.” I searched his eyes for a moment so that he knew I meant it. He smiled and gave a short nod before turning to go back to Garcia’s hospital room while I returned to the waiting room with Emily and JJ. “You guys okay?” I asked them, taking a seat beside them.

“I will be once we find this guy,” Emily answered.

“Same,” JJ agreed.

I stayed silent for a moment, then offered, “We could head back to the office and start building a profile…” They both looked at me. “I’m just saying.”

“You’re right,” Emily said as she stood, “Garcia wouldn’t want us to just sit around and mope. If she could, she’d be in her office right now, searching for who did this.”

“Yeah, but we don’t have any evidence,” JJ scoffed.

“That’s never stopped us before.”

We all looked at each other. We had an alias, we had the kind of gun he used, we knew what happened at the crime scene, Morgan and Reid could do a cognitive with Penelope to build a behavioral profile. To be honest, we actually had more than JJ was leading on. If we looked at this like it was any other case, and we started with victimology, we could make our way from there. And with Hotch and Rossi heading back to the office to meet with another tech analyst for help, we could honestly find the son of a bitch that did this to Garcia. If we just put our mind to it, we could do this. So we left.

Hotch and Rossi were already holed up in Garcia’s office with the new technical analyst that was going to help us by the time Emily, JJ, and I made it back to the office. We snuck by undetected, and we made our way into the boardroom where we started setting up shop. It was like Hotch expected that we would come back to start working the case because evidence photos were spread around the roundtable, and what little physical evidence and files they had were piled in a brown confidential box. I silently thanked Hotch for knowing us all well enough to have this ready for when we got there so that we could just dive right in.

I started by hanging up all of the photos on our board, using string to connect any similarities or clues that I spotted. Garcia lived in an apartment building that was built in the shape of a U around a simple courtyard with a cheap, rip-off, hadn’t-been-turned-on-in-a-decade fountain. Garcia had been led through that courtyard with her date, this James Colby Baylor guy, and all the way up to the front steps of her building. He got her comfortable, made her feel like she could let her guard down for just a moment while he complimented her and nearly made a move to kiss her. When she wasn’t prepared for it, he stepped towards the fountain like he was about to leave, then he turned around and shot her. Thinking that he had done what he needed, he ran away, leaving her to bleed out on the steps.

Emily froze when she saw me hang up the photo of the pool of Garcia’s blood that had still been on the steps when the cops started casing the scene.

“Just remember she’s okay,” I said. She nodded and turned back to keep looking through the files. “Hopefully Hotch and Rossi can find something about James Colby Baylor soon because that’s our only lead so far.”

“How could a random mugger plan to use a revolver and leave no fingerprints at the scene? This all feels premeditated,” Emily said.

 I agreed with her. Things weren’t adding up. I mean, we knew that he wasn’t a mugger because he went on a date with Garcia, but Emily brought up a good point. This wasn’t a date gone wrong or something like that. Whoever did this, whatever his name really was, he chose Garcia on purpose. There was something else that was really going on with this guy and Garcia. Hopefully Morgan and Reid would be able to find out more while talking to her as the morphine wore off.

“Um…” JJ mumbled, staring out the windows of the board room. Emily and I looked up from the evidence. “What’s wrong with Hotch?”

I raised a brow before walking around the table to see what was going on. Hotch had just left Garcia’s office from the left, and he was storming out to the elevators in the hallway. His face was sour and stern as he pressed the floor level button and tried to avoid making eye contact with the three of us in the boardroom as we watched him. Something must have happened when they were in Garcia’s office, but I wasn’t sure what. I had never seen Hotch that angry with a teammate, or with anything at work, before. Whenever I made him really mad, he’d get like that, but I always knew that I had done it and he’d calm down after punishing me. But with someone at work? Especially Garcia? Something had to be very, very wrong.

“Internal Affairs just ended our involvement with the case,” Rossi explained as he entered the room through the back entrance from the break room. We all turned to face him. “Hotch had to alert them about a protected file that Garcia has on her computer.”

“What the hell?” Emily inquired.

“They think that Garcia could be a security risk?” I asked.

Rossi shrugged. “Hotch is headed to the hospital now to ask her about it, but… now that Internal Affairs is involved, we’ve been taken off the case and she’s been suspended.”

“That’s bullshit. Garcia would never—”

“I know,” Rossi nodded, “but we have our orders. When they come to take everything, you need to let them.”

“No way,” JJ insisted. “This is ours.”

“Not anymore.”

We all looked out the windows again to see an agent from Internal Affairs walking up the boardroom. I cringed as he made eye contact with us and actually tried to smile at us. They couldn’t actually believe that Penelope Garcia was a security risk. She was an imperative piece of our unit— and even more so with the Bureau. She loved her job; she loved the agency. Garcia wouldn’t do anything to jeopardize our family. She knew better. And Internal Affairs shouldn’t have been getting involved. I knew that Hotch had to call it in, but he should have waited until he could talk to us or Garcia.

When he came in, he got right to work with tearing down all of the photos I had practically just finished hanging up. As he did so, he explained who he was, why he was there, and how we could help. He instructed JJ and Emily to pack up all of the files and evidence that they had been looking through, and hand it over to him. I watched them hesitate, and they looked to Rossi for the order to not listen to I.A., but he wasn’t giving in. So Emily and JJ started doing as they were told— reluctantly, but they still ended up doing it.

“Is this really necessary?” Emily bit at him quietly.

The I.A. agent let out a disappointed sigh, “Yes, this is necessary.”

“A federal agent was just shot, and you’re choosing to investigate her rather than find the guy who nearly killed her,” JJ said as equally sour as Emily was.

With how things were going with Strauss and the close eye she was keeping on mine and Hotch’s behavior, I couldn’t afford to start an argument with Internal Affairs. As much as I would have loved to have given that guy a piece of my mind, if I overstepped in any way, he could have gone to Strauss, and I would get in trouble again. Strauss told me to be careful because she wouldn’t give me another chance again. While I usually wouldn’t listen to Strauss, she literally held my fate in her hands. For now, Emily and JJ would have to pick this fight alone, unfortunately.

“Look,” the agent gave in, “I am sorry that this has to happen like this, but it is happening. The best thing you can do is just cooperate.”

“We should at least be able to keep working on the case—”

“This is part of the case, Agent Prentiss. We need to know what it is that she’s involved in and if it has to do with why she was shot.”

“She’s not involved in anything,” JJ rolled her eyes.

“You’re sure of that?”

“Yes,” all three of us responded.

The I.A. agent chuckled to himself. “Do you know why it is that the FBI hired her?” We all exchanged a glance of confusion, which he took note of, so he smugly continued. “She tried to hack the FBI, but she was on our radar long before that. The Bureau keeps track of potential problems, and we dictate what to do with them once we have them. Sometimes it’s safer to utilize them rather than lock them in a box and throw away the key.”

“So she was hired because she was dangerous?” I laughed. Garcia wasn’t a danger. She was the furthest thing from that. Garcia couldn’t even hurt a fly, I was convinced. “That’s ridiculous.”

“It’s not. There’s a lot you don’t know about your friend, Agent Greenaway. My suggestion is that you let the people who do know the whole truth do their jobs. It’ll make everything much easier.” He picked up the box of evidence that we had unpacked, and he repacked, and before we could argue anything else, he left.

I looked at Rossi, who was standing to the side, still silent, still trying to blend into the wall. JJ and Emily sat down at the roundtable, left with nothing to do. We had made our way to the office in the hopes of getting to help Garcia, but, of course, the Bureau wasn’t going to make things easy for us. They never made things easy. But now we had nothing to do, and we weren’t even at the hospital to pass time while waiting with Garcia.

Four days after we got that call about Garcia and we still had no new leads. We thought it would be an easy open and shut case because our witness was alive— thankfully— and we had the Unsub’s name. Yet, we were still falling short of finding any actual real answers, and being taken off of the case by Internal Affairs wasn’t exactly helping matters. Any information we did have, and any theories we had built since then were all based around memory, and would all be inadmissible in any case or court.

 Garcia had since been released from the hospital, and Morgan was about to take her home to keep an eye on her. After being sent home early from the office because we were taken off the case and our work hours were over at around four, Hotch and I took the evening to make up for the movies and hot chocolate night we didn’t get after the Feylinn case. I snuggled into Hotch’s clothes, and he got into a pair of pajama pants and a tight t-shirt— which really wasn’t doing any favors for me because I genuinely wanted to stay focused on the movie and not his arms and chest. I made hot chocolate again, this time we actually got around to drinking it, and Hotch just held me in his arms.

By the time we had gone through two movies (one of his choosing and one of mine), we were both exhausted. I thought about just sleeping on the couch, but he complained about being too cold and uncomfortable, so we slowly and groggily made our way upstairs to our room to fall asleep. As we got into bed, Hotch pulled the sheets and comforter up all the way to our chins, then he pulled me close to him so that we were spooning. I smiled to myself and kissed the inside of his left elbow because that was the one trapped under me.

And then his damn phone started ringing.

Hotch sighed in my ear, his arms releasing their hold around me as he turned over to grab his phone. I whined, trying to push my back up against his chest again to coax him back into cuddling me, but he ignored me long enough to answer the call. When I heard him hum a listening tone, he rested his chin on my shoulder and held me in his arms again. We didn’t have any ongoing cases, and with Internal Affairs all up in our business, we weren’t likely to get a new case. So it definitely wasn’t work. The real question was, who was calling so late?

“Morgan, you better have a damn good reason—” Hotch stopped in his tracks, and I could vaguely hear Morgan ranting about something on the other end. Within a startling instant, Hotch sat up, practically lifting me with him. After yawning and wiping the sleep out of my eyes, I pulled the sheet over my chest. “Okay, okay, okay,” Hotch said quickly, yet calmly, like he was trying to get Morgan to slow down. “We’ll be there in a few minutes. Call the rest of the team.” Hotch hung up the phone, and I looked at him. “Someone tried to get into Garcia’s place.”

I pushed the bedding off my body and raced to the closet. “What about the officer outside? And Morgan? Did he catch him?” I asked while throwing on some clothes.

Hotch joined me in the closet and started getting ready, too. “The officer on duty outside her apartment is dead, and Morgan couldn’t catch him in time.”

“Did he get a good look at the Unsub?”

“He says it’s definitely the guy who tried to kill Garcia.”

“Shit,” I mumbled under my breath. “They’re both okay?”

“They sound pretty shaken up, but I think they’ll be fine.”

I went back to the bedroom and grabbed my gun and credentials. Hotch came out of the closet, handing me a pair of shoes, and I thanked him quickly. He grabbed his things, too, and by the time I had my shoes on, we were ready to go. He held his hand out for me, waiting by the door for me to catch up. I took his hand, and he started pulling me downstairs, to the alarm— which I set— and then all the way out to the car. For the brief minute where we settled in our seats, got buckled, and Hotch started the car, we weren’t touching each other, but the moment he started backing out of the driveway, Hotch was holding my hand again.

I lifted his hand to my mouth and kissed his knuckles again. “I love you.”

I could tell that he needed the reassurance while navigating his way to Garcia’s apartment. She had only just gotten home, and we had finally decided to get some rest, and things went to shit again. I was sure that he felt somewhat responsible considering he turned her into I.A., which meant that she couldn’t go back to the office, so her only option was her apartment. But it wasn’t his fault. He had to know that. He didn’t do this. He couldn’t control this anymore than he could have controlled what happened the other night.

This was just another fluke. Our jobs were dangerous, and our lives could get crazy sometimes, but this was just one of those times where it seemed like things kept piling on and we couldn’t stop it. The good news, however, was that we could stop it. There was no way in hell now that we would let I.A. walk all over us and take us off this case. Even if it put mine and Hotch’s jobs in jeopardy again, we were going to find the guy who was doing this to Garcia, and we were going to put an end to it. Hotch just had to keep that in mind and keep his eye on the prize. This wasn’t his fault, and instead of blaming himself, he needed to put his focus into helping Garcia.

When we arrived at Garcia’s place, cops were already barricading off the street to make sure that only officials could get through. Hotch had to roll down his window as we approached and flash his badge at the officer standing by, and then we had to wait for them to move the barricade. Up ahead, it looked like Emily, Reid, JJ, and Rossi were already there, but Rossi was the only one still outside. Hotch parked us in the middle of the road, just in front of Garcia’s building, and Rossi came over to open my door like a true gentleman.

“They’re still barring us from the case,” he told us both as we got out of the car.

The three of us headed towards the courtyard where the lead detective was waiting. We passed the coroners who were bagging up the body of the cop who was killed by the Unsub while he was on duty to protect Garcia. I tried not to look over and think about how that could have been Morgan and Garcia, too.

“The Bureau says they don’t want you here,” the detective said.

“We’re just here to comfort a friend,” Hotch insisted, though we all saw through the lie.

“I don’t care what they say,” he admitted to us. “This guy killed one of us. Any help you can offer, I’ll take it.”

“Thank you,” I said.

“I’m sick of being behind this guy,” Rossi ranted. “We gotta end this.”

We all nodded and continued into the building so that we could see Garcia, and potentially talk to her and Morgan about what happened. When we entered her apartment, everyone was surrounding her, comforting her, trying to talk her through it. She was very clearly shaken. Between hugging her pillow close to her chest, resting her head on Morgan’s shoulder, and listening to everyone’s kind words, she looked like she was trying to calm down, but it would certainly take a while. Hotch immediately interrupted everyone by insisting that we take Garcia back to the hospital because that was where she would be safest, but she, of course, had to argue it.

“No, I want to stay here,” she insisted. “I’m starting to remember more. Maybe if I stay here, I’ll be able to remember all of it, and that can help you guys.”

I looked at Hotch. She was right. If her cognitives were finally starting to work at her house, in a familiar setting, then it might benefit us to keep her at home. As long as the whole team was with her, she’d be safe. We wanted to help her, right? Well, this was the best way to do it. There was no denying it. So Hotch gave in with a nod and let the team continue their questioning.

“Tell us about his car,” Reid encouraged, leaning forward in his seat. “You said it was a white, 4-door, American. What else?”

Garcia closed her eyes, took in a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “His seatbelt was buckled behind his back.”

My eyes widened slightly. Hotch and I exchanged a worried glance. There were only two kinds of people who sat with their seatbelts behind them: reckless people or police. For the most part, Hotch and I were pretty good about using our seatbelts, but if we were in the field and needed to jump out quickly, then we wouldn’t bother with them. If Garcia’s memory was correct, then there was a very good chance that the man who did this to her was a fed.

“Garcia,” Rossi said, sitting down in front of her, “You need to be straight with us right now.” He sounded angry and demanding—not at all as how I had seen him before. I figured that Hotch would be the one to finally snap at her because his fuse was always short, but Rossi surprised me. Garcia seemed taken aback, too, because she looked around to us for help. Rossi caught her with, “Don’t look at them, look at me.”

“I’m not hiding anything,” she said confidently and defensively.

“You got shot. Most people get shot for a reason. You’ve got a room full of people here who love you and are willing to believe that an FBI agent is trying to kill you. Now, I don’t know you all that well yet, so I’m going to need a little more convincing. We need to know everything you do on company time—which includes whatever the hell was on that file you secured.

“I—” Garcia hesitated, trying to look at Morgan, but Rossi wouldn’t let her. “It’s—It’s nothing—”

“Spit it out!”

“Rossi!” I yelled at him, but he held a silencing hand up at me.

“Tell us!”

“It’s nothing bad!” Garcia raised her voice, too, but out of fear rather than anger like the rest of us. “I counsel families of unsolved cases, and sometimes I’ll mark cases as imperative so they get reviewed faster.”

Hotch crossed his arms over his chest and said, “You’re not authorized to do that, Penelope.”

“I know,” she agreed while nodding and her voice shaking, “but I was just trying to help.”

“Yeah, but whoever was working those cases thinks you’re watching them now.”

“I just wanted to put pressure on them so that they don’t slide!”

“How many cases are we talking about?”

“I don’t know… Seven or eight, maybe? I would have to get into my system to know.”

“You can’t. You’re still suspended.”

“Wait a minute,” Morgan interrupted. “Garcia, you said that on your date, this guy was pressing you for information about your job—specifically if you were working murder cases.” Garcia nodded along. “Hotch, we’ve gotta look at those files. Whatever connecting piece there is in them, it has to be our Unsub.”

“We can’t do anything while Internal Affairs is watching us all at the office.”

“Yeah, but if we do it from here…”

Hotch sucked in a breath through his teeth while looking over at Rossi for a hint about what our next play should be. Honestly, it wasn’t a good idea and it probably wasn’t legal, but if Garcia could get into the system at home, find who the Unsub was, then get out before anyone could notice, it would do us some good. The only downside to all of this was that if Garcia did get caught, and considering Strauss’s tunnel vision on him and getting rid of him, she’d fire Hotch without hesitation. But, then again, it was still our best shot. Weighing the options, it could save Penelope’s life vs. Hotch losing his job. Unfortunately, the answer was fairly obvious.

Hotch released his crossed arms. “Alright. Dave, Y/N, JJ, and I will all go back to the office to maintain face and to keep I.A.’s focus on us. In the meantime, Morgan, Reid, and Prentiss, stay with Garcia. Don’t forget to log out of the damn system, understand?” Everyone nodded. He looked to me and Rossi, “Let’s go.”

When we walked into the BAU’s office, I spotted the Internal Affairs agent sitting at the table in the break area. He had cleared off everyone’s stuff, including the donuts Anderson brought in since everyone was going to have a late night, obviously; and he set up all of his work for his investigation into Garcia. It wasn’t right that he was there. I mean, they shouldn’t have launched an investigation into Garcia’s integrity while still searching for the person who shot her. There had to be priorities, right? Why was Internal Affairs taking a sealed file more seriously than an agent getting shot? It made my blood boil.

That being said, we knew we had to keep our cool. If we were going to buy Garcia and the others time, then we needed to proceed as usual. Hotch and Rossi went up to their offices on the balcony, while I stopped at my desk to grab some files. In the car, Hotch and I discussed potentially “reviewing some old cases” in his office, which really just meant that we were going to pretend like we were doing work while anxiously awaiting a call from the team with some news. If we just played this smart, we’d find the Unsub soon— since we were clearly the only ones who cared— and all would be forgiven. The investigation into Garcia and her work with the Bureau would ultimately turn out to be useless. She’d be reinstated soon, and things could just… go back to normal. But first we had to play this torturously long waiting game.

As I took my files from my desk in the bullpen up to Hotch’s office, I saw that the Internal Affairs agent stood from his seat in the break area to meet an officer at the front doors of the BAU. I furrowed my brows. They shook hands, greeted each other professionally, then headed over to Anderson’s desk where the tech analyst helping I.A. was sitting. I rolled my eyes, figuring it probably had to do with burying Penelope’s career rather than actually trying to save her. Assholes.

I stepped into Hotch’s office and closed the door behind me. He nodded towards one of the seats at his desk across from him, a silent gesture for me to get comfortable. As I sat down and put the files on his desk, Hotch tried to grab the top one, but I stopped him by putting my hand over his. We glared at each other shortly, a challenge to see who would let up first. Hotch wanted to work on some of my reports. Of course he did. But he already had a stack of his own, and we didn’t need a repeat of the Mulford case report. So he needed to work on his files, and I needed to work on mine. I get that he was just trying to help since he still felt somewhat responsible for my suspension, and me sub dropping the other day, and he felt like shit for going behind my back; but I wasn’t going to let him make it up to me by doing my work. Hell, he technically already made it up to me. How could he forget my reward the other day? Idiot.

“Come on,” he encouraged, trying to tug the file away from me. I narrowed my eyes and pulled against him. “Y/N.”

“Aaron.”

His glare strengthened. “I don’t want to look at my reports anymore. I’ve hit a wall with all of mine. Let me help you.”

I smacked his hand away playfully, managing to get a better grip on the file after he was caught off guard. I snatched the file and dropped it in my lap. “No.”

“No?”

I gulped. “We’re at work. Rules, Agent Hotchner. Remember our rules?”

He licked his teeth, a sign that he was getting angry and frustrated. “At some point, when this is over, and we’re back at home— where there are no rules, Agent Greenaway— I’m going to put you over my knee and show you what ‘no’ gets you.” He grabbed the next file on the top of my pile. “Don’t ever ask me about the rules again.” I cleared my throat as I looked down at the report I was holding. “What do you say?”

“Yes, Sir. Sorry, Sir.”

“Good girl.”

“I’ve gotta stop locking that door behind me…” I whispered under my breath.

“What was that?”

My eyes shot wide. I hadn’t realized that I said it aloud. I had been thinking about how every time I closed his office door behind me, leaving the two of us to speak privately, Hotch always seemed to forget that we were at work, and he let his dominant personality take over. It wasn’t like I didn’t enjoy it. I loved it. But he was literally the one who made the rules in the first place, and yet he seemed to be the worst about upholding them. I tried my best because I didn’t want the professional or personal consequences that would come with talking out of turn, but Hotch seemed to lose his filter when we were alone. It might’ve been due to the superior aspect that came with his job. Hotch liked having control over me. He liked telling me what to do in the bedroom, around the house, in the field, and in moments like these when we were alone and could speak freely. Being my boss probably allowed him to maintain that excitement of controlling me without being obvious. But being alone with me while at work, it was like a big stirring pot of all the things he loved about our relationship, and he just couldn’t seem to hold himself back.

That was why closing the door was always a bad idea. It gave him the privacy to demand things of me, to talk dirty to me, to tease me endlessly because he knew we were at work, and he knew that we had our rules. Every time he toyed with me like this, it made me want him to the point that I’d jump on him if the blinds on his windows overseeing the bullpen weren’t open. He knew that about me. He knew that I’d get on my knees for him under his desk if he asked me to. But he also knew that the two of us were being extremely cautious since Strauss was watching us like a hawk. He knew that he could torture me privately like this, and I wouldn’t be able to do anything about it. That was the fun of the game. That was what excited him most.

But if I just left the door open… What could he do? Nothing. That was why I thought it, but I hadn’t meant to say it aloud. When Hotch caught me, he knew what I meant, and I knew that I was digging myself into a hole that I could only escape once he punished me for it. He had been playing around with the “no” thing because I practically baited him, but my little slip up wasn’t a game. When he once had enough self-restraint to not flat out start sliding into dom space yet, he was now entirely Sir. I was screwed. Once this case was over, I was sure that I wasn’t going to be let off the bed for… well… until the next case would call us in.

“Sir—”

“Not another word from you,” he said gruffly, looking down at the file he grabbed.

The self-discipline it took to not go over to the windows, close the blinds, then punish me then and there was killing him, I could see it. He had practically involuntarily slid into dom space, and it was going to take him forever to calm down. I almost wanted to apologize, but I had been given my command. With how deep into it I already was, there was no point in pushing back. While I would’ve been bratty about it in the past, just because I could, I knew that we really needed to focus on Penelope. It was fun to forget about reality from time to time. We liked spending a few minutes forgetting about everything going on around us. It was hard being in our field without taking a moment to remember who we were and how much we loved each other. People probably wouldn’t understand our dynamic. They would look down on it and turn their noses up at how we could act like this between talking about work and focusing on cases. But it was hard to take everything seriously all the time. If we didn’t appreciate who we were when things got too dark, then we’d lose our minds.

My phone started ringing. Talk about saved by the bell. I scrambled for it nervously, acutely aware that Hotch was paying attention to my floundering, despite how his eyes were focused on the report. I took a look at the caller ID, Morgan, before answering quickly.

“Sunshine, I need you to listen very carefully,” he said in a panic before we could greet one another. I continued to stay silent, waiting for what he had to say. “The Unsub’s in the BAU. He’s the deputy sheriff that’s standing next to the I.A. agent at Anderson’s desk.” My eyes shot wide. “Stop— Stop reacting.” My face fell flat. “Do you see him?”

I didn’t have to look over to see who Morgan was talking about. When I had been walking up to Hotch’s office, I saw the officer, and originally thought nothing of it. But now he was in the middle of the FBI. “I got him,” I answered calmly. Hotch looked up at me. He was trying to get a read on what was happening. “What do you want us to do?”

“Don’t approach him. Don’t let him know we’re onto him. We profiled him, and he’s a classic narcissist with a hero homicide complex—”

“And he’s spiraling?”

Morgan hummed an agreement. I swallowed hard, still trying to keep my cool.

If he was spiraling, that meant that he was going to go down shooting. The profile of Unsubs with hero homicide complexes included that they were sociopaths that didn’t even care about their own wellbeing if they knew that they were approaching the end. If Morgan was right— which, I trusted that he was— then our Unsub was going to take as many people as possible down with him if he even got a whiff of us closing in on him. Taking him down was going to be hard, especially since he was an armed, trained officer. It didn’t matter that nearly everyone down in the bullpen had guns. If he took even one person hostage, we were screwed.

“I’ll tell Hotch. Thanks.”

“Be careful.”

“Yeah.” I hung up the phone and cautiously put it in my pocket. “Deputy in the bullpen,” I told Hotch.

He glanced out of the corner of his eye, clocking who I was referencing. “They’re sure?” I nodded. “What’s the profile?”

“Hero homicide.”

Hotch let out a quiet breath. “Okay. I’ll get Dave. I want you to go down the ramp just out front, not the one to the side. Go through the bullpen to get to your desk, grab your things, and try to make your way to the doors like you’re waiting for us to join you there. We’re going to surround him quietly and carefully. Understood?” I nodded again. “Go.”

I pushed myself out of my seat and started calmly walking out of Hotch’s office. He was just behind me, opening the door for me like a true gentleman. As I stepped down the ramp just ahead, Hotch took a sharp turn to the left to walk on the balcony. The deputy in the bullpen, along with the Internal Affairs agent and tech analyst, were focused on the computer in front of them. They were too busy to even notice how the office was moving around them… How I was watching them out the corner of my eye.

As I grabbed my purse from under my desk, Rossi opened his office door in response to Hotch knocking politely. They exchanged a few whispers, glancing down in the bullpen to look at the deputy and me. I nodded vaguely, a signal that I knew the plan and I was going to make my move. After taking note of Hotch’s lingering stare, I nervously bit my lip and took a brave step towards the doors. My eyes shifted to the deputy instinctively. When we made eye contact by accident, I cursed under my breath, and kept trying to move, my hands free and ready to reach for my weapon on my hip whenever.

I glanced over my shoulder quickly, noting that Rossi and Hotch had split up to take opposite corners of the room. My eyes met Hotch’s again, and I tried to look for a signal, knowing that I couldn’t make it any further without raising suspicions. The plan was for me to head to the doors, but he already knew. If I stepped any closer, the deputy would probably take the I.A. agent or the analyst hostage, or he would just start shooting without warning. But the signal I needed from Hotch didn’t come. He couldn’t give it yet. The three of us still needed to move into a better position.

“Well, thank you for coming in, Deputy,” the Internal Affairs agent smiled up at the officer.

Whatever it was they had been doing on Anderson’s computer, they were done. Maybe this would work itself out. If the deputy left, we could arrest him down in the parking lot where there weren’t innocent agents Hotch was responsible for in harm’s way. This could actually go well. All of our fretting could have possibly been for nothing, if we were lucky.

“Thank you for hearing me out. I’m sorry about all of this,” the deputy responded in kind.

“Oh, that’s no worries. We’re just happy to help—”

“That’s not what I meant.”

Before we knew it, the deputy reached out, locking the I.A. agent in a choke hold. Just as Hotch, Rossi, and I unholstered our weapons, the deputy pointed the barrel of his gun at the agent’s head. Everyone, including the analyst sitting just in front of them, fell to the ground, trying to find cover under the desks. He got smart, pressing his back against the corner by the glass doors before I could get there. From where Hotch, Rossi, and I were all standing around the office, none of us could get a clear shot. I mean, if we wanted to take the I.A. agent down with the deputy, then, sure, we could make the shot. But we weren’t going to do that. Our only plan of action now was to diffuse the tension— though, it was probably going to be useless if we were relying on the team’s profile. However, we still had to try.

Out of all of us, Rossi was the best negotiator. Hell, he wrote the interrogation and negotiation how-to books for the FBI. In the Academy, we studied his tactics, and we studied his reports. If anyone could get through to the deputy, our best shot was Rossi. We all knew it.

“Don’t do it,” Rossi shook his head. I adjusted my grip on my gun as the deputy wavered. “You’re a cop. You know how this is going to go down unless you drop the gun.”

“I’ll take my chances,” the deputy spat.

“You’re standing in the middle of the FBI… What chances do you have?”

“You think that I’m afraid of the FBI?”

“No,” Rossi shook his head. “You’re afraid of being forgotten, and afraid of being remembered as the villain. You want to be the hero; I know you do. But if you kill that man there, you won’t be the hero. If you kill him, you’ll be locked away and forgotten. It’s your choice. You write the ending. You decide if you’re the hero or villain tonight.”

The deputy chuckled. “They told me you guys were the best minds in the FBI; But that’s the best you have? Pathetic.”

Hotch looked over at me, then to the door over my shoulder, before looking back at me. I raised a brow, wondering what he was thinking. His eyes shifted to my other shoulder, almost like he was telling me to move that way, away from the doors. I took the hint and slowly started backing up. The deputy took notice of my retreat, but he still didn’t make a move or say anything about it.

The thing I knew, a gunshot rang. The glass doors to the BAU shattered as a bullet penetrated them and fired right into the deputy’s head. Since he had been caught off guard by the shot to the back of his head, he didn’t have a chance to press his finger down on the trigger. As his body fell to the ground, his gun flew over by my feet. I quickly knelt down, picked up the weapon, and tucked it in the back of my pants waistband for safe keeping.

JJ stepped in through the doorway of broken glass. Her hands were shaking as she holstered her weapon, the same one she used to shoot the deputy in the back of the head. Everyone started slowly getting up off the floor while Hotch and Rossi moved in. We knew that there was no chance that the deputy was alive, but we all wanted to see it with our own eyes. This was the guy who killed our Penelope Garcia, after all. We needed the reassurance that he was really gone.

“You okay?” I asked JJ, holstering my own weapon, too. She nodded shortly, still staring down at the body. “You sure?” She nodded again, but this time more vaguely, like she was unsure of her answer. “You did good.” I patted her shoulder.

“It’s what he gets for shooting Penelope…” she whispered under her breath. “No one hurts the people we love and gets away with it.”

I nodded and looked over at Hotch. He was staring at me while talking to Rossi. My forehead creased slightly as my eyes softened into a pout. His did the same for the slightest moment. “I love you,” I mouthed to him.

“I love you, too,” he mouthed back when no one was looking.

[chachkayes]

The Confession - Mer x Hayes

I saw something on Twitter saying we were supposed to get a Mermac rain kiss if COVID hadn't happened. I assume it was probably going to be in the finale - I got so sad that we may have been robbed of it because of COVID shutting down production. So, I decided to write it based on how I'd want a Mermac rain kiss to go down. (This is my 5th time reposting this because it keeps posting wrong. Hopefully it’s right this time.)

-------------------------------- 

Cormac Hayes had been wrestling with himself over his feelings for Meredith Grey for months. So much so that he often felt the urge to tell her while they were halfway through a surgery. Every time they worked on a case with each other, he became more in awe of her surgical talent, her kindness, and professional demeanour around patients. It took everything in him to not reveal his feelings after every surgery they performed together. He decided to confide in Link, one of his closest male friends at Grey-Sloan. Link had encouraged him to tell her, of course. He knew the two would make a great pair, and he was pretty sure Meredith was interested as well. Jo, Amelia, and Maggie all felt the same way. They were fully aware of the feelings the peds surgeon was harboring for their sister/ friend – but none of the three dared to say it out loud or confront either of them about it. They did, however, start a bet pool surrounding when Hayes would tell Meredith about his feelings for her. Whoever guessed the closest won $300. Amelia gave him 2 weeks before he broke and told her. Jo was not optimistic he’d hold out even that long and gave him a maximum of 5 days – he had been keeping his act up for months already and she had witnessed him almost breaking multiple times. Maggie figured he’d probably tell her in 3 weeks. She had no reasoning for the guess, other than that it would still probably take him a few weeks to figure out the best way to tell her. He was a sentimental guy, and she didn’t think he’d just want to blurt it out, out of the blue. 

1 week later, Cormac asked Meredith out for drinks. He phrased it in a way that she could assume they were hanging out as friends. He knew he had to tell her that he liked her sooner, rather than later – well before Andrew DeLuca was back at work. The bet pool participants were officially on standby – would Jo’s guess win at 2 days behind 1 week, or would he hold out a few more days and tell her closer to Amelia’s 2-week guess? 

Meredith said yes to drinks, of course. She liked spending time with Cormac, and she liked tequila too. She was excited to see him outside of the hospital for once. As she sat at home, getting ready for her outing, Amelia, Jo, and Maggie surrounded her like excited puppies. Meredith had told them that she was hanging out with Hayes for the night and was incredibly suspicious of her sister’s excitement. They helped her pick out her outfit – a sweater with chains around the shoulders that Jo had lent her, a pair of plaid, high-waisted pants, and a pair of cute little black, suede booties. Maggie had insisted that they do her hair and makeup a little before she left, too. 

Meredith left for the outing around 7pm. She and Cormac arrived at the same time, conveniently. They headed down to the bar, as she ordered her usual. “Tequila – wow. I don’t know if I would’ve expected that from you.” Hayes said with a laugh, ordering a beer. “Don’t worry, I won’t order too many.” Meredith knew full well that the night would not end pleasantly if she drank too much tequila. They grabbed and paid for their drinks, then headed to a booth. 

“You know, my sisters were incredibly excited about us getting drinks tonight, for some reason.” Meredith said with a laugh. “For some reason, that doesn’t surprise me.” Hayes responded with a chuckle. The two had a seamless conversation the whole time they were at the bar – nothing ever felt awkward, and there were never any long periods of silence. 

As the time approached 8:30, Meredith found her legs getting restless. “Hey, Hayes, do you mind if we walk around outside for a little bit? It’s getting crowded in here, and I really need to move around.” She said, with a slight look of plea on her face. “Yeah sure, let’s go.” All Hayes could think was that the timing for revealing his feelings was approaching quickly, and that Meredith didn’t need to have any plea on her face – he’d go wherever she wanted to, no questions asked. 

As the two surgeons walked around downtown, Hayes was conflicted as to if and how he should segue to tell Meredith about his feelings. He knew he wanted to do it tonight. “Hey, Grey, do you still have feelings for DeLuca?” There was really no segue to this question, but Hayes knew that if he pushed off telling her for any longer, he wouldn’t do it ever. “I mean, he’s the first person I said ‘I love you’ to after Derek. I’ll always care about him, but I think I’ve moved on.” Meredith said, pushing her bangs out of her face. 

She stopped in her tracks, and Hayes did too, turning himself to face Meredith. “Why. What’s the matter?” Meredith tilted her head, confused. The seconds of silence that followed felt like an eternity, and as if a sign to go for it directly from Abigail, it began to rain steadily. “You…” Hayes began to say, pausing to reflect and make sure he said everything exactly how he wanted to. “I’m really grateful, to have you, uh, in my life. You amaze me, Grey. When you work, the way you handle yourself, your precision, and the sheer amount of talent you possess. It’s incredible.” Meredith was flattered, and also completely unbothered by the rain falling down around them. 

“I asked you if you had any feelings for DeLuca, because if you did, have feelings for him, I wouldn’t tell you that…” Hayes’s voiced trailed off, planning his next words very carefully. “That what?” Meredith had a good suspicion about what Hayes was about to say, but knew she had to let him finish. “That I have feelings… for you. And I have since I arrived in Seattle. I didn’t want to interfere when you were with DeLuca. I also didn’t think it would be possible for me to feel anything for anyone after Abigail died, but you took me by surprise.”

As Hayes was talking, he hardly noticed Meredith walking closer, and closer to him, until he looked up at her, and found her standing on a few inches away from him. He took her hands in his, in a moment of confidence. “If I’m being honest, I’ve been interested too… for a few months now.” Meredith looked directly into Hayes’ eyes. The rain began to fall even harder, and yet neither of them were phased by it. Meredith placed her hand on Hayes’ cheek, as the tension between them grew. In a split second’s decision, Hayes pulled Meredith forward, wrapping his arms around her waist, kissing her. She immediately fell into it, placing her hands around the sides of his face. Neither of them wanted to break away – everything felt right. As the rain poured around them, the only thing they could focus on was each other. It was as if time stood still, and they were the only people on earth. When they finally broke apart, Hayes had an attractive new confidence to him. 

“I want to take you on a date – a real date.” Meredith shot him a bright smile, kissing him again for a second. “Can I take that as a yes?” Hayes smirked at her. Meredith laughed, responding, “Yes, you absolutely can.” Hayes shot her a sweet smile. The two finished the rest of their date, walking side-by-side as they ate some food-truck dinner. 

Link drove them back to Meredith’s house, and waited in the car as they said goodbye on the front porch. “Grey?” Hayes said, thinking about their kiss and Abigail. “Yeah?” Mer responded, quietly. “I couldn’t have imagined that first with anyone else. You are pretty special.” Meredith smiled at the floor, the looked up again and kissed him once more. “Thanks. You are too.” They stood, staring at each other for a few more moments. “I should probably get going back to my boys. Can’t have them staying up playing video games too late.” Hayes smirked, which made Mer laugh. “Goodnight Hayes, I’ll see you tomorrow.” Meredith said, letting go of his hand that she’d somehow grabbed ahold of, and they parted ways for the night, both on cloud nine. 

Maggie, Amelia, and Jo immediately hounded Meredith when she got inside. “WHAT HAPPENED WHILE YOU WERE OUT TONIGHT?” Amelia exclaimed, her eyes almost jumping out of her head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about” Meredith said, trying to play it off. “What do you MEAN? We saw that kiss on the porch, Mer! Now, spill!” Jo pushed. “Well, we had drinks, walked around downtown, he told me that he has feelings for me, and we kissed in the rain. That’s as much information as you guys are getting.” Jo laughed, looking at Amelia and Maggie. “Looks like you guys owe me $150 each” she bragged. “Were you guys placing bets on my love life?” Meredith said, in shock. “No, we were placing bets on when Hayes would finally admit that he likes you. I guessed the closest, so now they owe me $150 each.” Jo said, which made Meredith laugh. Meredith stayed up another hour, talking with her sisters, before heading to bed. She went to sleep that night with a smile on her face, replaying her incredible, whirlwind night with Hayes in her head.

[loverfighter]

well. i think i’ve finally pinpointed the Thing abt chapter 2 that really digs under my skin / makes me uncomfortable to look at too closely (not the character execution of half the losers which is major and probably reason numero uno why chapter 2 does not live up to the book nor first movie and i Will go on abt later but i’m waiting to finish my reread to do so) and it’s essentially that eddie and richie are almost.... forced apart for a lot of it. in chapter 1 we have so many moments, countless looks and gestures and dialogue to point at and say look! there! that’s why they’re in love! where the impact these characters have on each other holds weight and they’re so deeply intertwined to the degree of siamese twins, one never without the other, never farther than a thought or heartbeat away (physically touching in one way or another anytime they can, a beacon through the walks of hell). it’s clear, on both ends, that whatever love they hold for each other is profound and heavy and embedded six feet deep into each other’s souls, transversing across memory, distance, time. even in the background of a scene in which the main focus is ten feet away, highlighted in red and grasping at your attention, you can spot eddieandrichie⏤together, inseparable, linked. 

with chapter 2, this dynamic is hinted upon, and given to us through flashes, but never through scenes alone (prior to neibolt) or actual context. in fact, the scenes we Do have in which their magnetic pull towards each other is allowed narrative (hammock, eddie taking off the shower cap, eddie looking away smiling after richie’s “what the fuck does that mean”, going into the photo booth separated from the rest + eddie pulling richie in, eduardo! andale, them expressing constant agreement w each other through gestures, all of the jade of the orient stuff, etc) was courtesy of the actors and not the script or (likely) direction. bill even said that He was the one who had to push the clarity of richie’s sexuality, to clearly express that he’s gay (“““movie canon”””), while andy and the rest thought vague would be the best route to go in fear of audience reaction. and even then! it’s not as forward as it should’ve or could’ve been (considering they pulled eddie’s canon death scene w the love confession + more emotional moments between them in that setting + the supposed kiss), and oh! not to mention stripping eddie of his own homosexuality and giving richie the bowers storyline, which was the scene that cemented his sexuality in the movie, making it clear that the crew knew the dynamic and context of the interactions between eddie and bowers. 

the point remains that all of the “official” reddie scenes are... kinda out of nowhere? we are given spare information, but lacking any context, leaving the general audience with no way to complete the puzzle with a dozen missing pieces. during the flashback, we see richie carving r+e on the kissing bridge, set after the events of the arcade, and obviously the e stands for eddie, but that’s it! nothing before or during that flashback gives the average watcher any information besides that, and the ones of us who are invested have little satisfaction from that moment alone, when we’ve been building it up and expecting an actual storyline, rather than 5 secs in a minute long flashback clip (that is to say, the r+e is one of my fav reddie scenes, but maybe they shouldn’t have teased it in the trailers if that was all it was gonna be?). 

richie is the one to calm eddie down, snatch away his inhaler bc it’s meaningless physically and damaging psychologically, and tell him “you’re braver than you think.” but why is it that richie is able to get through to him when no one else can or bothers to, why richie, why does he understand what eddie needs to hear, why does eddie listen and take it to heart, especially when richie is the one emphasized to have a crush on eddie and not vice versa? they’re important to each other (on a deeper level than they individually are with the rest of the losers), it’s clear based on that scene, but that’s what it’s left at, with no scenes or dialogue previous to that moment propping it up, other than the r+e, which doesn’t account for eddie’s reaction. and then, they’re together when they face the doors, parallel to benverly who are shouting their love at each other. again, this is telling us something, which is less surprising based off of the inhaler scene 5 mins prior, but then it swiftly plummets to eddie essentially sacrificing himself / saving richie. again: why? 

to me, it’s obvious. to y’all, it’s obvious. we all know well enough, right. but susan in the seat next to me doesn’t, nor do her two friends, or even my friends (getting new ones) or the majority of people who came out of that theatre. they walked out of there and didn’t understand the relationship as requited bc they weren’t given the context and love and soul of reddie. and i think what upsets me most about that is that i can’t just brush it off as them not understanding the nuance or depth of a stupid clown film (if it was the stupid clown book, sure, or even the first stupid clown film but) bc it was done on purpose. they were afraid of negative responses to the lgbt storyline (and god forbid there’d be two of them in their precious big studio film), and so they strangled the heart out of reddie. and because reddie became canon (or richie’s crush became canon), they had to tone down the “gayness” of their relationship, because now the audience would have a new perception of what they were to one another, and no longer have the cushion to brush it off as a “brotherly relationship” (sorry finn). take bill and mike for example! objectively, they were probably “gayer” than reddie, because they were allowed to touch, to show affection, to say i love you. but of course they can’t be gay, bc bill has a wife and they don’t see mike as enough of a person to give him anything good. 

it’s like. what they (production) Have given us is flashes of moments that they are barely responsible for and bury ur gays (fantastic rep), wherein the sexuality of the character that actually dies is kept vague so that the record breaking number of people that went to see their film (who frankly don’t even care) won’t think the film is too gay. like. LMFAO it’s so dumb and frustrating bc on one hand we’re valid for clocking reddie but on the other we’re Too Wild for thinking that it’s a requited love story. like yes, i’m grateful that richie’s sexuality (re his attraction to men; i think he’s bi, movie canon leans toward gay but whatever) is canon, that the wretched grief he felt at losing the love of his life was Shown if only to paint how deep the emotion he felt went, that r+e is forever carved into history. but that’s hand in hand w me being upset over eddie’s character and sexuality being sidelined, at the graphic depiction of gay men being murdered with no full circle moment as it Should Have Been, at having to defend reddie as canon bc some cowards in the editing room couldn’t handle the negative reviews of a few bigots at the expense of their invested and loyal and passionate audience who care abt this story and the characters within it. 

idk. anyway. this is the result of me going crazy so don’t pay it much mind but. imagine how fucking tired i am

[qtheronie]

Dazais ill-fortune

Warnings; fluff to angst, mention of death, some cuss words.

Yuh girl back at it again with some angst!

And I’m sorry if this is super crappy and if you find grammar errors, the thing I use to help with my writing has disowned me!

My goal in life was to get enough money to buy a cure for my mother's sickness. So that's why I started working at the armed detective agency. I became friends with a man named Osamu Dazai then soon became lovers. I’ve made so many friends and memories apon working here. My first memory was when I first met Osamu

{February 14th, past.}

I pulled the doors open to mine and my boyfriend's favorite cafe. As I walked in, I was greeted by one of my ideal workers, Amani Takahashi. She immediately grabbed two menus and walked me towards my usual booth.

She had sat me down and grinned, she pulled out her little notebook and grabbed the pencil from her ear and asked me what to drink.

“The usual?” she asked, and I nodded in return. “And for the special boy?”

“The usual for him as well, a black coffee.”

Amani smiled and scribbled down the request and ran off to the kitchen. I had pulled out my phone and looked at the time. (7:30) It flashed. I sighed and turned off my phone, waiting for him to come.

Amani came back with our drinks and set them onto the table. She pulled out her little notebook again and asked if I was ready to order. But I told her no and to wait for (Boyfriend's name) to show up. The waitress nodded and put her notebook back into her pants and walked off to more customers.

Thirty minutes had now passed, and they're still was no sign of him showing up. I let out a soft groan and rested my hand on my cheek and looked out the window. ‘He’s going to show up! I know he will, I just need to wait.’

I sighed and looked at my phone, an hour had passed and still no trace of him. Not even a text. The bell on the door to the cafe had rung, making my head peep up. I was hoping that it was him, but it was a boy with shaggy brown hair with bandages wrapped around his arms and face making it look like he was heavily injured. I cringed at the scene and wished that he was doing okay.

He looked over at my way and made eye contact with me; he showed a soft smile as I did in return. I felt a notification go off on my phone, which caused me to break eye contact with the boy and look down at my phone.

I had received a text message from (boyfriend's name). I smiled a bit. I opened my phone and went into his contact and called him, which he picked up seconds later.

“Hey!” I heard his voice from the other line, “I'm sorry that I didn't show up today. I was uh, a little busy.”

The small smile on my face had dropped. Of course, he was busy. He always is.

“It's okay. I should’ve known that you were busy.” I was going to ask him if we could replan, but I heard the faint voice of a woman. “Are you at work?”

“No, I’m at home. Why?”

Now, I didn’t want to be one of those girlfriends who assumes that your partner is cheating on you, but why was there a voice of a woman on the other line? I shake my head at my thoughts and respond to him.

“No reason, just making sure you’re safe.”

There was that voice again, but this time it was louder and was calling out to (Boyfriend’s name).

“(boyfriend’s name), is anyone with you?”

“No.” He responded, “God, you’re getting nosy.”

“Oh- uh sorry, I was just wondering.”

“No, you think I have a girl over don’t I?”

Well yea kinda, I’m not dumb I heard a voice. I thought.

“No! Of course not.”

“I know you’re thinking that I do, you think I'm cheating on you?”

“(boyfriend’s name)-” But I was too late, he hung up.

I set my phone down on the table roughly and curled my hands. Tears threatened to fall out of my eyes as time passed. I folded my arms on the table and let my head fall. I squeezed my eyes shut trying to prevent tears from falling.

“Whats a beautiful lady like you sitting here all by yourself and crying due to boyfriend issues” I heard a voice ask. I lifted up my head to see that same man who I saw earlier. I quickly wipe away my tears and straighten my back.

“How did you-” I started but was quickly cut off.

“Waitress” the strange man called, “Can I get a cup of wine, and this beautiful young lady a?”

“You don’t need to get me anything, i'm good.”

“Please, I hate to see such a pretty face cry. So Please, what would you like?”

I looked at the man shyly and then told him what I wanted, “A strawberry milkshake, please” The waiter smiled and took note and left to the kitchen.

“Why are you doing this? We don’t even know each other.”

“Well, we can solve that problem! I am Osamu Dazai”

Osamu Dazai, I thought. He looks like one. I look at Dazai once again. Now I can see more detail of what he looks like. He had gorgeous brown eyes that somewhat matched the pale color of his skin. He has bandages wrapped around his arms and face. He had also had a little gauze patch on his cheek and was even wearing a black trench coat.

“Well, m’lady, you have a name right?” Dazai asked, breaking me out of my train of thought.

“Oh yea, sorry. My name is (Your name), (Last name).”

{Present}

That was the day that I had met Osamu Dazai, valentines day. Where my boyfriend couldn’t join me because he was busy with some girl or something. I’m almost glad that (boyfriend’s name) didn’t come. Dazai made me realize that I didn’t need such a person that I didn’t need someone who didn’t love me. Cause one day, he's going to wake up and notice that he should’ve tried. And that I was worth the fight.

The only person I needed was Osamu.

That brings us up to the next important memory I had of Osamu.

{ May 30th, past }

“Osamu, how much longer am I going to have to wait?” (Your name) asked, trying to adjust her seat in the car while being blindfolded. “My butt hurts.”

(Your name) heard the man beside her chuckling before the car came to a stop. “You don’t need to wait any longer! I shall come and save you, my belladonna.” Dazai unbuckled his seat belt and got out of his car. He then opened the door on (Your names) side and carefully helped her out.

He grabbed onto her hand and led her through what felt like sand. “Osamu Dazai, I swear if you’re going to try to make me commit double suicide with you, then I am not interested.”

Dazai once chuckled again, “Don’t worry. It’s not going to be a double suicide this time. Though I wish you would just let me die in your arms, then I would be at peace.” he slightly pouted.

“You know, if I wasn’t blindfolded I might’ve just happened to take that offer”

“My sweet belladonna, would you really!?” Dazai’s eyes had lightened up in excitement.

“Just kidding.” Dazai groaned and mumbled a few words under his breath.

After a few minutes of walking they were finally there. Dazai had (Your name) stay in place as he stood behind her and untied her blindfold. The girl felt Dazais fingers slowly untie the knot. Soon light quickly invaded her face making her squint as she slowly started to adjust her eyes to the new light her and mouth dropped.

He had taken her to the beach. He knew that she loved midnight walks on beaches so when he finally got some free time from the agency he would take her to the beach at midnight. And then confess what he longed to do. His love.

“You might wanna close your mouth before bugs get in.”

(Your name) chuckled and slapped his chest playfully, she then felt dazais back press onto her chest. He wrapped his arms around her figure and rested his face between her neck and shoulders. (Your name) rested one hand on top of dazais, and the other went up into his hair. “My, my, someone's affectionate tonight.” Dazai left an “mhm” for a response. His grip onto her waist had grown tighter as if someone were to take her away from him. He buried his head deeper between her neck and shoulders and let out a soft I love you. He wasn’t thinking that he was going to get a response, but when (Your name) said that she loved him too, his world stopped.

Dazai took a deep breath and pulled away from (your name) and made her turn around. Dazai closed his eyes and let out a sigh before starting. “Maybe it was your laugh, or your eyes or your smile. It could’ve been your hair, or your voice, or your personality. Whatever it was, it made me fall. Pretty damn hard.”

“Osamu-”

“I love you. I don’t ask you to reciprocate the feeling. All I ask you is to respect what I feel. Because falling for you was never something I planned.” Dazai had finished, he had a small spark of hope that the girl who he felt so desperately in love with would return the feelings, but her silence was beginning to make him doubt the little faith he had.

“(your name),” He started, “I'm sorry-” But he was quickly cut off as he felt her lips on his.

(Your name) had placed her hands on both sides of his cheeks and pulled away but close enough that she felt his breath on her lips. “I love you,” she said before placing another kiss on his lips before pulling back. “Before I met you, I never knew what it was like to be able to look at someone and smile for no reason.” and she kissed him again but this time it was longer.

Dazai had put his hands on her waist and pulled her closer to him, then he pulled back from the kiss.

“Then would you do me the favor of becoming the one who I can commit a double suicide with?”

“Depends.” (Your name) giggled, “will you become my boyfriend?”

Dazai smirked and kissed her again, “I think you already know the answer to that, belladonna”

{Present}

Now, we’ve come along this far, and you’re probably thinking that I fulfilled the goal I had for my mother and married Osamu.

No.

Everybody has their share of life before they have to leave.

So this is the last important memory I had of Osamu, the day I died.

{June 19th, past}

We were walking down the road hand in hand when it happened. If it wasn’t for (your names) special ability, it wouldn’t have been dazai instead of her.

A white-looking car had sped down the road with the windows down with two men in it, the driver and the passenger with the gun. As the car drove past the two couple (Your names) ability had activated, making the world slow down. She had looked to the left where dazai had been at, which was next to the car. The person in the passenger seat had fired the gun rapidly. The girl let go of dazais hand and latched on to his arm, making him stumble back, making him nearly missing the bullets.

This wasn’t (your names) plan, her plan was to take him home and grant him his wish and start a family with him. It also wasn’t her plan to get shot at either.

(Your names) ability has disactivated making the car sped off and dazai falling to the ground with (your name) on him.

“(Your name)!” She heard dazai scream her name. He quickly got off the ground and pick (your name) up and into his arms.

She had felt dazais chest rise up and down quickly, and his grip on her tighten as he runs. The girl looked up at her boyfriend, gazing at his face that had the sheer look of panic.

“Osamu.” (Your name) whispered, she lifted her hand and caressed his cheek. “I’m not going to make it.”

This caused dazai to look down at the girl, tears running down his face. “No! Don’t say that, we’re so close to the agency! Yasono will help you! She’ll heal you!”

(Your name) smiled and coughed out a little blood, “Osamu, you know I love you. I love you so much, so very much.”

“Please just a little longer! I can see the agency from here!” Dazai cried. He was never like this, but he couldn’t care less that people could see him scream and cry. The love of his life, his girlfriend, his soon to be wife, and his baby (pet name), was dying in his arms.

“Osamu, you’re..so..strong..” (your name) whispered, letting her hand slowly fall from his face.

Dazai got to the building where the agency was, and kicked the door open, “yosano!” Dazai yelled, which to his luck, the doctor rushed out of her office.

She looked at the boy with the girl in his arms and ushered him into her office. Dazai had set the girl onto the bed and backed up, letting the female doctor take over.

It had only been an hour or two, but to dazai, it felt like the entirety. Yosano had opened the door and looked at dazai with pain in her eyes. Dazai stood up from his seat and ran into the room, and there she was. On a bed, she was barely breathing. He knew that it was only going to be a bit until she had to go.

He walked to her bed and sat on the chair beside her. Dazai reached over to (your names) hand and held it. He then placed his other hand on the side that he was holding and brought it up to his head, “Of course I’m strong. I’m your..your Osamu.” He finally spoke, answering (your names) response from before.

He had heard (your name) slightly and quietly giggled. She turned her head and lifted her unoccupied hand and placed it on dazais cheek. “That’s right. You’re my Osamu. Don’t ever doubt your strength even though you don’t feel it.”

“I love you (your name)! You can’t leave me, please. I don’t know what I would do without you!”

“Osamu..”

“If you’re going to leave me, then at least let me come with you!”

“No Osmau..it isn’t your time yet.”

“Please..” he cried out

(Your name) grabbed his hand and pressed his palm agasint her lips, “I love you so much.”

Dazai had let go of her hand and placed his on her cheek, rubbing his thumb on her cheekbone. “I love you too”

“I’m glad that I get to die by your side. I do.” (Your name) smiled, and used the last of her strength to kiss the man she loved so much, dazai quickly pressed a hand on her back and head.

Dazai pulled back to look at the girl “(your name)?” Dazai asked, but got no response. He slowly laid her down. “You promised (your name).” He mumbled, “you promised that you would commit double suicide with me.” Dazai looked down at the women he loved and grabbed her cold hand. “But you forget that you can’t do a double suicide alone.”

{present}

This is the end of my story, the story that took so long to start and finish too fast.

We learn that some stories just don’t have happy endings, and sometimes that’s okay, cause one day you’ll meet again.

END

Haha, thank you for reading this long angst and sucky book. This took me about a week to complete, and this is the longest story I have ever written.

Quotes I used: “you’re..so..strong..” “Of course I’m strong. I’m your..your..” -Mikhail and yuliy, Sirius the jaeger.

“Maybe it was your laugh, or your eyes or your smile. It could’ve been your hair, or your voice or your personality. Whatever it was, it made me fall. Pretty damn hard.” -unknown

“I love you. I don’t ask you to reciprocate the feeling. All I ask you is to respect what I feel. Because falling for you was never something I planned.” -unknown

“Before I met you, I never knew what it was like to be able to look at someone and smile for no reason.” -unknown

(I got all of my quotes on Pinterest)

Big thanks to @xxxlilacskiesxxx skiesxxx for letting me use your Oc, Amani Takahashi.

And a big thanks to @tea-memes for helping me correct this and giving me ideas for this. Big help :)

[mingiswow]

SKZ Reaction | Another member hits on his BFF Crush

⇨Chan

“Y/N~ah” Seungmin screamed when he saw you entering through the door of their dorm and ran to give you a hug.

“Hey, Seungie” you hugged the boy back and played with his hair. “Where’s Chris?” you walked straight to his studio, knowing he was there, Seungmin following you behind, holding your hand.

“He hasn’t left his studio has been days, noona”.

“That’s why I’m here” you simply answered, opening the door in front of you and screaming into the dark place “Everyone out! Let’s breathe some air, get some vitamin D, eat healthy food” the boy was about to get pissed but when he saw it was you, a smile appeared on his face. “I don’t want to hear a single word, Christopher Bang” his smile instantly died when he saw you holding hands with his friend. He was too sleep-deprived that he even thought properly when he stormed out of the studio, pulling you with him. “Chris… Chan” you tried to call him but he just took you to his room, closing the door behind him and sitting in the bed, face between his hands.

“Why were you holding Seungmin’s hand?”

“What?” his question got you by surprise. “You know I like to hold hands and demonstrate my affection to people” you sat by his side, hand gently touching his knee. “Especially when it comes to my babies. You know I’ve adopted them”

“It’s just…” Chan felt the words stuck on his throat.

“You need to stop being such a coward and tell me you like me, Bang Chan” his eyes widened. “Dude! You’re too obvious” you laughed at his cute flustered state. “But I like you too, you doofus”

“If you liked me and knew I liked you, why haven’t you told me anything?” 

“Because I didn't want to scare you away, I didn’t know if you knew you liked me or if you were denying or whatever” his smile appeared again, his dimple showing. “So, would you like to go on a date with me?” he laughed and nodded.

“I’d love to go on a date with you, Y/N”.

fuck gender roles thx

⇨ Woojin

“But I don’t want to~~~” Jeongin whined as Woojin and Chan where -desperately- trying to make the maknae go to school. And you couldn’t blame him. It was a cold winter morning, those that you just want to stay home all day in front of a fireplace drinking hot cocoa and watching silly movies. “I want to stay home and cuddle with Y/N noona! Her cuddles are the best and I love to be with her. Please, hyung! Can I stay home with you?” 

“Jeongin, no! You’re going to school! Your parents and JYP and our manager trusted your education on us, so you’re going to school” Woojin answered, pulling the duvets away from the little boy. 

“Ugh! Ok!” you giggled at the boy, he always acted like a little kid in the early mornings. You looked over to your best friend and gave him a thumbs up. “But I know you want to stay alone with noona because you like her and you know she likes me more” the eldest eyes widened, shooting death glares to the boy.

“Woojin~ssi” you called your best friend, his face red from embarrassment, his jaw clenched. “You like me?” he nodded, hands playing with the hair on the nape of his neck. “Why you never told me anything?”

“You know I’m not very confident with this, Y/N. I was afraid you were going to reject me” a chuckle left your mouth.

“I’d never reject someone like you, Woo. You are... perfect” you gently placed a kiss on his cheek.

“Oh Gosh! Now I have to deal with school and these two?” the maknae groaned from the distance, making you two laugh.

⇨ Lee Know

Minho had invited you for the launching party of their newest full album and you accepted right away, not only for your best friend but also for the other boys. 

You arrived at the party and went straight to look for him, but since he was busy, you looked for the Itzy girls.

“Y/N! You’re looking stunning!” Chan complimented you when he and a few of the boys arrived. 

“Thanks. And congrats on the album” you congratulated him and looked around for Minho, but still no sign of him.

Chan, Felix, Changbin and you kept talking close to the bar. They were telling you about the making of the album and all the concept process, Chan once in a while would squeeze your hand or gently touch your knees with his own. You could feel your body react to it instinctively, shivering every time he touched you. 

“Min!” you screamed excitedly when you saw him but he just sped up and passed by you without even acknowledging your presence. “Hey! Minho!” you called again, going after him, grabbing his arm. “Min. I was looking for you”

“It didn’t look like” he crossed his arms, closing his face. You tilted your head confused. “Why don’t you go back to Chan?” you chuckled at him, making his eyebrows to furrow in annoyance. “What?

“Are you jealous, Lee Minho?” he turned his head to the side and sighed deeply, and you couldn’t help but chuckle at him again. Your hand slowly reached for his, intertwining your finger. “You have nothing to be jealous about, Min” you squeezed his hands, making him look at you again. You lower lip was between your teeth looking at him shyly. “Because I like you and only you” you could swear you saw the whole room light up when he smiled, his eyes closing in two little moons. 

“Do you like me? Like-like me?” you nodded and his arms instantly wrapped you into his chest, your head hidden in it, deep inhaling his perfume. “I like you too, Y/N” he took you of his embrace after a few seconds, his hands holding your face to look at his eyes. “I’ve liked you for quite a while now. Sorry I was too afraid to tell you” you shook your head, the smile never leaving your lips.

“We are here now, aren’t we?” he nodded.

You took a step closer, closing the distance between your bodies and joining your lips together, forgetting you were still on the party. It was just a peck, lips touching each other and enjoying their warmth. It felt like forever but you finally broke the contact, hearing screams and cheers from your friends, making you blush, but nothing would take your happiness away.

⇨ Changbin

Being best friends with an idol was not easy, you could barely see Changbin and the other boys because of their schedule. But when they finished the promotions and you thought they’d have a little free time, boy you were wrong! The boys locked themselves in the studio and Bin never had time for you. Again.

You entered the dorm, greeting the security guard outside and going your way to Chan’s studio.

“Hey, Y/N!” Hyunjin greeted you with his killing smile, walking towards you. 

“Hey, Jinnie. Are you all recording today?” you asked as you looked to him, shifting between him and Changbin inside the booth.

“Yeah. The guys said they had prepared some new songs and wanted to see how’d sound with our voices.

“Oh. Cool!” you shifted your weight on your feet. “Hm… Do you now when Binnie will leave the booth? I’m missing my best friend”.

“Not so soon. But you can stay with me while he’s busy” he added when he saw your face drop. The tall boy snaked an arm around your waist, hugging you by side. “Hey! Don’t be sad. Let’s go to the dorm, yeah? We can watch some movies and stuff our faces with shitty food” you nodded, smiling a little. Hyunjin was the only one who knew about your crush on Changbin, always trying to help you two with it, but, in his opinion, the rapper was too blind and dumb too see your true feelings.

It was already almost 3 am when the boys arrived, finding you cuddling on Hyunjin’s side while sharing a blanket and a long-forgotten Netflix show playing on TV. Chan looked over the smaller one, his face closed and angry.

Changbin walked towards the dancer and flicked his head, making the boy wake up a little scared.

“The fuck Changbin?” he rubbed his head. “You could’ve wake Y/N up too”.

“I ask you that!” he whispered-screamed, not wanting to wake you up but also to show his member how pissed he was. “What are you doing with my best friend in your arms?” the boy chuckled disbelieved.

“Dude, she went to the studio looking for you, but you were too busy working yourself out to even notice her there. You’re just too dumb, hyung”.

“What did you say?” the boy was a little pissed with the whole situation and his friend calling him dumb now?

“I said you’re dumb. Jesus, Changbin! Y/N has been trying to see you for ages but all you do is throw her away for work. Don’t you realize she likes you? And more than a friend” the rapper blinked a few times in complete silence, the only sound being heard was the TV and his heartbeat.

“She… She likes me?” Hyunjin rolled his eyes.

“Goddamn it! Yes! For a while now. So tomorrow, when she wakes up, you’re going to take her on a nice breakfast date and confess to her” he left your embrace and handed you to the other. “And please do it right, dumbass”.

“If I wasn’t so happy I’d beat your ass”.

“Yeah yeah, you would” Hyunjin rolled his eyes and left the room, leaving you on Changbin’s arms.

⇨ Hyunjin 

“When are you going anyway?” Woojin asked as he helped you cook for the boys. You’ve been good friends with the Stray Kids boys since you and Hyunjin joined the company together and were both dancers. You quickly became inseparable when trainees and even after his debut.

“Next week. I still have a few things to work on here before I go” you shrugged. You hadn’t debuted yet and decided to take a few interviews for college as an option.

“I know you’re sad, Y/N. But I want you to know you are a very talented dancer and choreographer” you smiled at the boy.

“Thanks, Woojin~ah” your head hang low, you were trying hard not to cry. “But I guess I’m not good enough to be an idol” you deep sighed and soon your body was wrapped into a bear hug from him. You loved Woojin’s hug.

“Everything will be fine. Everything happens for a reason, yeah?” you nodded and he let a little kiss on your forehead.

You two heard someone clear their throat behind you and turned to meet Hyunjin with a not-so-friendly face. 

“Hey, Jinnie” you greeted, fake smiling and wiping a tear away. “How a-” you tried to speak but were cut by him.

“Are you crying? Woojin did you make her cry?” he was pissed, and you didn’t know why.

“Hyunjin, it’s all good. It’s not-”

“What did you do to my girl?” he took two steps closer to the older one and you blinked a few times.

“Your… girl?” you repeated his words loud enough for only you to hear.

“Hyunjin…” Woojin tried to ponder but the other cut him.

“No! You know I like her and you keep getting closer and closer to her! Haven’t I told you about that, hyung? Haven’t I told you about how I feel uncomfortable when you or the boys get too friendly with her? You know I’m not confident when it comes to Y/N and you keep hitting on her” he said the words all too quickly, almost throwing up his feelings, his chest rising and falling at a fast pace.

Woojin smiled, you could see a little mischief if you squinted, and pointed behind his member. The boy turned, finding you with widened eyes and blinking several times, cheeks burning red and breath as mismatched as his. He kept looking at you, mouth agape trying to say something, but he didn’t know what to say.

He just confessed to you. And not in the way he wanted.

⇨ Han

You two met when he was a contestant at the King of Masked Singer and you were a trainee assistant. For some reason, you two really clicked after a few minutes and have been friends since then. He even said you were his best friend outside his group and you couldn’t feel happier.

But as cliché as it sounds, you were so into him that you couldn’t help your eyes to wander him while he was practicing some dance moves with the boys. His body was so perfect and his smile and laugh matched perfectly with his personality. You were so lost in him that even felt someone sit by your side.

“He’s getting really good” you got startled by Felix's deep voice, making the boy laugh. “Do you want a bucket?” you raised an eyebrow at him. “C’mon! It’s visible you like him, Y/N” the heat got up to your cheeks, tinting it pink.

“Nah! You’re delirious, Lix… I think there’s too much sweat in your brain” you flicked the side of his head, making you two laugh.

“I think you should go for it. You two would look really good together” if it was possible, your cheeks got even pinker. “You are a pretty and nice girl, Y/N. You’d look good with anyone”.

“That’s n-”

“Are you two having fun?” your sentence was cut short by a sweaty Jisung.

“Yeah. I was just telling Y/N how she looks pretty today” the boy by your side spoke, a grin on his face and Jisung cheeks inflated. “I was telling her how lucky the guy that dates her is going to be”.

“Felix” you reprehended the boy, but he kept his grin watching his friend’s next movements.

Han, in a quick movement, sat on your other side, pulling you to sit on his lap.

“J-Jisung… what are you” you were cut again, but this time by the boy’s lips being pressed to yours with a certain rush. 

It took you a little to comprehend what was happening but when your senses came back, you closed your eyes and enjoyed the sensation of his lips. They were soft and tasted a little salty by his sweat, but you didn’t mind it. Not at all. You were finally kissing Jisung.

“Finally!” you two broke the kiss hearing Jeongin talking behind you and, just then, you remembered where you were. “Thank you, Felix. If I had to feel any more sexual tension between these two I’d throw up” the boys laughed at their maknae.

“You’re welcome Innie. And you’re welcome to you two too” he grinned and left the practice room along with the other boys.

Before you could even say a word, Jisung pulled your mouth back to his, kissing again. This time a little more passionate, not just a simple peck.

“Yeah. I’m definitely a lucky guy”.

⇨ Felix 

“Felix, we are fucking lost” you groaned to your best friend as you walked somewhere you didn’t know. “Are you sure you ever camped?”

“Yes” he answered. “I’ve slept in a tent in my backyard in Australia once”.

“I’m going to freaking kill you, Youngbok” Minho said between gritted teeth.

“Now is not time to get stressed, yeah?” Chan reasoned. “Let me see this” he grabbed Felix's map and looked at it. After a few more minutes of walking, you finally arrived at the right destination. And Felix wasn’t so wrong after all.

While the boys put the tents up, you helped Minho with all the food and necessities you brought, dividing it by category.

“No no, Y/N” the dancer spoke taking the object from your hand. “That’s how you open it” he showed and then gave it back to you.

“Thanks, Min” you smiled at the boy, getting back at sorting things out. “Thank you guys for inviting me. I never camped before”.

“Oh. You’re welcome” he never took his eyes out of the seasonings packs he was sorting out. “You should thank Felix, not me”.

“I will, don’t worry mister” you two laughed and he hit your shoulder with his.

“Hm… Minho, Woojin was calling you” Felix appeared in front of you and soon enough occupying the other’s spot. “I don’t like how he talks to you” the Australian boy said, eyes low.

“What? Why?” his words got you by surprise.

“I don’t know. I just don’t like how he touches you”.

“Are you jealous Lee Youngbok?” you joked with him, not expecting his answer and much less his hand caressing your cheek.

“What if I am?” you blinked quickly a few times, eyes widened, making Felix laugh. “You really are blind, aren’t you? I like you, Y/N. For a while now” you drank up his words, trying to process everything. “I will understand if you don’t like me back tho”

“No. I mean. I don’t know. I never thought of this. Of you. Us” you finally spoke, looking down then looking back to his beautiful brown eyes. “I just need a little to sort it out. Ok?” he nodded.

“Anytime you need. But we’ll still cuddle to sleep, right?” you laughed and nodded, laying your head on his shoulder. Thinking about Felix as more than a friend wouldn’t be hard at all.

⇨ Seungmin 

The rain was pouring outside, ruining your plan of doing a picnic in the park. However, you guys decided to do the best out of the situation, doing sheet tents in the living room and doing your picnic and watching movies.

“These cookies are delicious, Y/N!” Changbin said excitedly, taking another bite of your homemade chocolate and chocolate chips cookies. You giggled at his expressions.

“Thanks, Binnie” you moved closer to him and cleaned the corner of his mouth with your fingers. “You look like a kid eating” he started to doing aegyo to you, acting like a kid and making you laugh at him.

Out of nowhere, Seungmin got up and left the tent stumping his feet on the ground, making sure everybody knew he was upset with something. Your best friend could be a little bratty and savage sometimes, it’s not for nothing STAYS nicknamed him Savage Seungmin. You excused yourself and went after him.

“Minnie…” you slowly opened the door of his room, finding him sitting in his bed with arms crossed, cheeks inflated, pouty lips and sulky face. You had to do your best not to chuckle at his cuteness and pinch his cheeks. “What’s up?”

“Why don’t you ask Changbin?” the annoyance in his voice when he spoke his hyung’s name could be heard and sensed from miles away. “You two were oh so friendly”.

“Seungmin… Are you jealous of him?” he didn’t say a word, shifting a little in the bed to turn his back to you. “You have nothing to be jealous about”

“Really? Because it was quite clear he was hitting on you, Y/N”

“And he can’t do it? As far as I remember I’m still single” you provoked him, knowing damn well he’d spill his true feelings.

“Yeah, I know, but I don’t want you to date him or anyone else” by the time he finished his sentence, you were cornered between him and the door. You didn’t know where this confidence of him came, but you liked it. “I want you to date me” your arms snaked his neck, getting on the tip of your toes to look on his eyes,

“I thought you’d never ask” you two smiled, sharing an Eskimo kiss. 

⇨ Jeongin 

You and Jeongin have met at school, you were classmates and you were a trainee in a smaller company, it was a matter of time you two became inseparable, the favorite babies of everyone with your cute and sweet personality. 

The boy invited you to his dorm so you could finish your history project before he started to do the promotions for his new album.

“Hey!” Jisung greeted you happily, as he opened the door. You politely bowed to the rapper. “Stop with this. You’re my friend” he passed one of his arms on your shoulder, leading you inside the place. “Baby I.N is late but you can wait with me, I was playing some games”.

“Thanks, Jisung~ssi. I’m the one who’s early though” you followed him to their room and watched as he skillfully played some game you never heard or seen before.

Soon enough you two engaged some random conversation about their new comeback and their new concept. You were feeling so comfortable in the boy’s presence and his conversation that you even noticed your best friend’s presence until he, exaggeratedly, cleared his throat.

“Hey, Innie” you got up and grabbed your things, bowing politely to the rapper again. “Thanks for the company, Jisung~ssi”.

“For nothing, Y/N. Whenever you need” he blinked and you felt your cheeks to burn as you walked towards the maknae.

“Hum… Wait outside for a little, I just want to talk with Jisung first, yeah?” you nodded and left the boys alone, waiting for Jeongin outside, but they didn’t realize you could hear everything loud and clear. “If you ever hit on Y/N again I won’t answer for my actions, hyung”.

“Why haven’t you told her yet?” the youngest took a deep breath. “You need to be fast or else someone will ask her out soon”.

“I know. I will do it. Soon” you couldn’t help but smile wide when you heard the words spoken, running to his room to squeal happily. All you had to do was wait for him to finally ask you out. However, it wouldn’t hurt if you helped him a little, right? ;)

[lettersinscarlet]

Neighbors (Colby Brock Imagine)

Hey everybody! I hope you all have been having wonderful days. I feel so “eck” right now. Anyway, I’m super excited to get working on my series, but I have no clue what the title is yet. I wish I knew what the title would be, so I could stop calling it “my series,” but that isn’t happening yet. Please send in little scenarios because I need a distraction. My requests are open, but I won’t be working on anything besides blurb until I finish writing the series. I want to have it all written out before I start posting anything, so it might be a little while, but that’s okay. Enjoy!

Request: Can I request one where the reader grew up as next door neighbors with Colby and they were best friends, and the reader had a huge crush on him but was too scared to tell him, but the reader had to move away in 10th grade before she ever told him and they lost touch, but she decides one day to message him and they meet up again finally confesses her feelings. (happy ending!)

——————————————————————————

You sat, staring at your phone screen, wondering if you should go through with it. Staring at Colby’s contact, you sat and relived a few memories.

Back in middle school, you used to live in Kansas. You were best friends with your next door neighbor, and you even went to the same middle school together. Who knew that your neighbor would grow up and be a big YouTube star? Anyway, you and Colby would walk together to school every day and would hang out afterwards. It was just normal for you guys.

Then, high school came around, and you started to develop feelings for him. You weren’t entirely sure, and you weren’t willing to take the gamble, but you thought that maybe he was starting to feel it, too. You guys were getting closer to each other, always hanging out, almost inseparable. You loved going on adventures with Sam and Colby on the days you didn’t have homework, and the days you did, you just blew it off anyway.

That first year of high school was great. And then your second year hit.

In the middle of tenth grade, your parents told you that you had to move at the end of the summer. One of your parents got a new job, and it was going to make you leave Kansas.

The rest of that year was so sad for you, and Sam and Colby tried to make you feel better by packing in a lot more fun stuff to do. They didn’t want you to have to move away either, but there wasn’t anything they could do. So you guys went exploring everywhere. Your weekends were never dull, and you loved thinking about some of the things that you did.

That first weekend of summer was when you had to move, and that Saturday was full of tearful goodbyes. You promised to stay in touch, but everyone knows how that works out. So you left Kansas, heading to the great city of Los Angeles.

You did try and talk to Sam and Colby whenever you could. That went from every day, to ever week, to every other week, to every month, and eventually it just died out.

You still had feelings for Colby after you moved, and you didn’t stop thinking about it.

That was, until you met David.

David was so sweet, kind, and loving, that he blocked out your feelings for Colby. You were pretty sure that you loved David. You started dating during your senior year, and you guys had lasted for a couple years, until the end.

David has fallen in love with somebody new. So he took you out to a nice meal, and then told you that it was over. You made it home before you really started to cry, hearing his explanation over and over in your head, wondering what you could’ve possibly done to keep him around. The truth was, it was nothing that you did or didn’t do. It was just hard to convince yourself of that fact.

So you were here now, sitting on the couch in your apartment, trying to think about everything. Then you remembered just how happy you felt when you were around Colby, and all those dormant feelings slowly started to come back. Now your thumbs were hovering over your keyboard, wondering if you should text him. You weren’t even sure if this was still his number or not.

Before your brain could tell you no, you started typing.

“Hey, It’s me, (Y/N). From Kansas. Remember me?”

You sent the message and then you started to panic. What if he didn’t remember you? What if this was the wrong number? Did you sound weird? Everything started rushing through your head. Your phone buzzed and you looked in your hands.

“Of course I remember you! How are you?”

And just like that, you fell back into the same habits. You were texting non-stop, and things were just like they had always been.

“Are you still in Kansas?” you asked, still catching up with him.

“No. You’ll never guess where I’m at now,” he answered.

“Where?”

“The great city of L.A.” he sent back. You smiled so wide while you were sitting on your couch and you texted him about how cool and exciting that was. You guys talked for a little longer before he pitched out a suggestion.

“Are you doing anything right now?”

“No,” you answered.

“Wanna meet up?” he asked. You checked your clock and you saw it was starting to get late, but you could still go for some coffee.

“Sure!” You suggested your favorite coffee place and he agreed, so you got ready to go there.

You showed up about thirty minutes later, going to sit down at one of your favorite booths in the café. A few minutes later, you saw Colby walk in and you waved him over. He walked over and hugged you before he sat down.

“It’s been awhile,” he said after you said your hellos.

“It really has been,” you replied with a smile. You guys spent a few more minutes catching up, before you started reliving some old memories.

“Those days were the best, weren’t they?” he asked after some time.

“They really were. Do you remember how close we were back then?” you brought up. Thinking about it made your heart flutter a little bit in your chest.

“Yeah, I remember,” he said, his cheeks turning a little red. You took a deep breath, your heart fighting with your brain about saying what you were thinking.

“I wonder what would’ve happened if I didn’t have to move,” you thought aloud, looking down at your hands.

“I think I know what would’ve happened,” he whispered. You glanced up at him and he sighed before continuing. “I don’t know if you knew this, but I sort of had a crush on you back then,” he admitted. “I probably would have told you how I felt, at sometime, and maybe we would’ve dated,” he finished.

“Really?” you questioned. He glanced up at you, his cheeks almost flaming red, and he nodded. “I sort of had a crush on you, too,” you confessed. His eyes lit up for just a moment and he smiled at you. “If only I hadn’t have moved,” you sighed. There was a moment of silence, before Colby looked you in the eyes.

“What’s stopping us now?” he asked. You looked back at him, a little stunned, before he kept going. “We’re both in the same city now, I know that I don’t have a girlfriend, and it just feels like we’ve been given a second chance at this.”

“Do you really still feel that way about me?” you asked, quietly. He reached across the table and grabbed your hand, bringing your attention back to him.

“I haven’t stopped,” he whispered back. He gave you a heart-stopping smile and you couldn’t help but smile back.

“Then let’s give it a shot.”

You guys spent a long time with him, just talking and being excited. Finally, you could be with someone who you knew would make you happy.

Eventually, the night had to come to an end. Colby grabbed your hand and walked with you to your car. When you got to your spot, you turned so you could face him.

“I had a lot of fun tonight, Colbs,” you grinned at him.

“Yeah, me, too. I can’t wait to do it again,” he added. You went to turn around, but he stopped you. Gently, he leaned in and kissed you, softly and sweetly, and then he pulled away.

“Goodnight,” he whispered.

“Goodnight,” you said back. He waited until you got in your car before he walked over to his. You were smiling the whole way home, totally excited to see where this new relationship would take you.

———

Taglist:

@sp00kybrock @yikes-xander @daddydobrock @trapbrock-local @thenameisbabe @far-to-many-bands @lyssaholic @wacky-webber-458 @colbysbaby @katiaw2 @brocks-girl @chesterbenngintonaremylife @frickin-bats @magicxshadows @absolutelynobodyposts @nyctophobics

[a-lonely-ass-hoe]

December 16, 1991

*GIF is not mine all credits to the owner*

Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader 

Warnings: death, sadness ,and some cursing, and alcohol

Word Count: Roughly 1,500 

A/N: Sorry I’m not really good at summaries and writing either lol but enjoy this small blurb that I had written a longgg time ago but the story is basically what happens on December 16th, 1991

December 16, 1991

Tony had said goodbye to his parents, thinking he would see them soon. As they left, he laid on the couch and began to watch t.v. he was falling asleep, but the doorbell rang. You stood there, wearing a coat and the adorable smile Tony had begun to fall in love with. You guys had been together for almost six months.

You were always the type to buy Christmas presents early, having a specialized gift for each important person in your life. Tony on the other hand got his gifts the morning before Christmas. Tony let you in and you gave him a peck on the cheek and began apologizing.

"Sorry for not calling, I just so happened to be walking around the area and remembered you lived here, and since I know you're always stuck in here, I wanted to ask you to come shopping with me. You know to spend more time together, unless you don't want to, I completely understand."

Tony smiled, grabbed your cheeks, and roughly kissed you. He grabbed his coat and keys. "Shall we?" You giggled and walked past Tony. You both walked the streets of New York, mostly window shopping. Tony loved the fact that you had quickly brought his mood up. He loved the way your hair moved with the breeze, the way your eyes and smile shone.

Tony had never really had anyone in his life give him as much love, affection, and attention as you did. He was always amazed at how much love you had to give. You brought him back to reality when you pulled on his arm and pointed toward a small ice cream shop. He smiled and nodded, you ran pulling him into the ice cream shop.

The ice cream shop was warm, weirdly enough. It had a small variety of ice creams along with some hot drinks. You order your favorite ice cream, and Tony orders some hot chocolate. You both sat a small booth, you smiled at Tony and begin to lick your ice cream cone. Tony sipped his hot chocolate. You guys sat at a comfortable silence. He reached his hand out, for you to grab. His thumb rubbed against your hand and you both smiled as you squeezed his hand.

"Why were you so serious when I came by?"

"Oh nothing, my parents were going on a business trip."

"Are you mad, they didn't take you?" You giggled.

He smiled and chuckled, "Yeah, I was incredibly mad."

"Hey, we should have a movie night. I would suggest my place but you always complain about how crappy my movies are and t.v.'s shitty quality."

"Yeah, let's go to my house, you like my couches better anyways."

"You know me so well."

Tony and you walk back to his home. You begin to prepare popcorn and order a pizza. Tony grabs some beer from the fridge. You and Tony decide on Die Hard for the first movie. You also decided on Beauty and the Beast as the second film.

As you guys ate pizza and drank beer, you both cuddled together. Tony laid down with you between his legs, he twirled a piece of your hair in his hands.

"(Y/N) guess what?"

"Hm?"

"I also have a copy of The Last Boy Scout."

"You're fucking with me, are you serious?"

"I am fucking you, but yes I'm being serious."

"What! How!?"

"I have lots of friends." He shrugged.

"You know I'm a sucker for Bruce Willis."

"I know." He laughed and got up to put the new movie in. This time he was between your legs and you played with his hair. For the first time in a long time he could say, he felt happy and filled with love.

You both fell asleep in each other's arms. It was very early in the morning, when Tony got a call. He didn't want to answer and he let it ring. The phone started ringing again. This time you woke up and hit him with your elbow to answer the call. He ignored you and cuddled you harder. After the third time the phone rang, he annoyingly got up and answered the phone.

"Hello is this Anthony Stark?"

"Yes, who is this?"

"Mr. Stark, your parents Howard and Maria Stark have been in a vehicular accident."

Tony felt his heart stop. "Wha--whe--where are they!?!"

"In Long Island Hospital."

Tony hung up the phone and began to get dressed. You got up and stares at him confused.

"Babe, what's wrong?"

He didn't answer as he grabbed the keys and ran to the garage.

"Tony!" No answer. "Tony where are you going? What happened?"

His breath was jagged, he could barely breathe. His hands were shaking and his heart skipping beats. "M-m-my parents...they got in a c-c-car crash."

"Tony I'm coming with you, where are they?"

"L-l-long Island."

"Let's go."

Tony would have argued with you, to not come with him but he couldn't think straight. You drove as fast as you could to the hospital. Tony was still shaking and fidgeting. You held his hand and squeezed it. He calmed down and squeezed your hand back. He looked at you and he knew he was in love with you. He had known ever since you guys had hit the 3-month mark. He would confess his love for you right now, if his mind wasn't so focused on his parent's well-being.

When you had reached the hospital Tony jumped out of the car and ran to the entrance. You ran after him, locking the car. After Tony asked for his parents and he ran through the halls, everything seemed to go in slow motion. All the lights felt blurred, all the noises were just loud beeps in his ear. He saw his parents' bodies laying on the cold hospital operating doors. All he noticed was the flat-line sound and his parents' lifeless bodies.

He sat outside the room, tears didn't run down his face. Nothing. He felt nothing. He felt as if the world just went dark. He felt a void.

Weeks after he had stayed home alone, he had not eaten, bathed, done anything. If it hadn't been for you coming every day, he would have died. Today, was the day of their funeral. You had organized most of it, due to Tony not being mentally prepared for any of it.

You made Tony breakfast and made sure he ate. You told him to bathe, while you got his suit ready and cleaned his bed-sheets. Beer bottles, and other alcoholic beverages laid on the floor around the room. You ironed his suit and you left it on his bed. He sat on the floor, his head on the toilet seat. You grimaced and began to run the bath. You helped him out of his clothes and into the bathtub. You changed into an old t-shirt of his and boxers to bathe him. He closed his eyes and laid in the bathtub. You massaged his scalp and his shoulders. You could hear him sigh, you washed the soap off and drained the bathtub. You dried him off and helped him into his shirt and underwear. You sat on the bathroom counter, and had him between your legs. You began to shave the little bit of scruff he had on his face. When you finished you helped him get dressed and gave him food you had ordered earlier. You then finished getting ready yourself.

Tony was now sitting on the kitchen stool staring at the couch you had both fallen asleep on the night he got the call. You rested your chin on his shoulder and hugged him from behind. You gave his hand a squeeze which he reciprocated.

On your way to the funeral, it was just like a movie. The clouds began to dull and then the rain began to fall. Tony held onto your hand the whole event. He had said his eulogy first, then other friends of Howard's and Maria spoke. You always squeezed his hand to make sure Tony was doing okay. As the event ended Tony didn't bother talking to other people, he wanted to go home.

When you got to his house, he hugged you. You rubbed his back and kissed his cheek. You squeezed his hand one more time and began to walk towards your car. Tony grabbed your hand and squeezed it. You smile sadly and pull him into a hug again. This time he began to cry. It was the first time he had cried in front of anyone after the incident. You cuddled with him all night, you made him tea and played any happy movie you could think of.

Tony regrets not saying goodbye to his parents probably and he knew he would for the rest of his life. He also knew that he had you by his side and that's all he would ever need. You had fallen asleep in his arms again, he finally smiled again.

“I'm in love with you (Y/F/N)”

“I'm in love with you too Anthony Edward Stark”

[pinkbubbles-and-bigtroubles]

Watching You Walking Away

Haven’t posted much original content lately so here’s some Michael smut. Hope you enjoy!! Feedback is much appreciated

Michael kicked back in the booth, enjoying the taste of a pint of Sharp's. He'd always loved British beer, and he was already on round four. Or was it five? It had rained since they touched down in London, and Calum was spending the day with his sister before their show tomorrow. Luke had a cold so it was just Ashton with him in the pub tonight. It was next door to the hotel they always stayed at and had great food. They'd started the night washing down greasy sausages and chips with a couple pints of ale. Ashton, always chatty but worse when he was drinking, was sharing tour horror stories with another drummer in town for the festival they were also playing. Michael laughed at how Ashton always drew a crowd wherever he went. He was about to chime in with some details Ashton forgot when his voice died in his throat.

The way she moved was so familiar but hard to place from across the room with alcohol clouding his brain. Until she laughed, and Michael was suddenly transported back to when he was 17 and she was his whole world.

"What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost," Ashton nudged his arm and Michael, at a loss for words, could only nod towards the table across the room in response.

Ashton followed his eyes, "holy shit is that Lux?" Michael shivered at the nickname he'd given her.  He cursed Ashton silently for being so loud as she looked up at the sound of her name, lighting up in a smile as she saw the drummer. She leapt up and met Ashton halfway as he wrapped her up in a giant hug. Michael watched them chatting unable to hear anything but his pulse pounding in his ears.

He'd met Lucy when they were both skinny 14 year olds obsessed with guitars and punk rock. He'd taught her chords, and she'd taught him how to french kiss. They'd written songs together, and promised they'd always be friends. Hazy memories that now competed with the present of how good she looked tonight. Her hair was longer, and the skirt she had on teased a tattoo on her thigh he was instantly curious to see. Lux was laughing with Ashton when her eyes met Michael's. Her eyes went wide and she grinned at him causing his heart, at least he thought it was his heart, to start doing flips. She rushed over to him and he quickly stood up to greet her. They stumbled into a hug, electricity dancing across his skin as they touched.

"Wow it's been years, you still look decent though. How's everything with the guys?" Lux asked smirking when Michael just stared and couldn't answer right away.

"You look beautiful, but you always have," he stammered out. Oh yeah real smooth Clifford, he thought.

"So you gonna buy me a drink or not?" Lux teased and he nodded, signaling the waitress.

"How's things with your band?" Michael asked trying to keep the conversation neutral.

"Everything is good. We're doing two nights here in London before doing a quick tour of the UK and then it's off to Europe for a couple months. We switched record labels last year, and they're more supportive . They're allowing us more freedom to try new things instead of wanting to remake that first album again and again." Lux eyes flickered away and he saw the pain that still lingered.

Her first album, Sinking Ships, had gone #1 in several countries and even cracked the top 10 in the US. The first two singles, Bruise Me and You, had been fairly successful. She'd followed that with Return To Me, a haunting ballad about a cheating lover, that had been a big hit. The entire album was about their breakup, and Michael still felt gut punched anytime he heard those songs.

"Yeah record labels can be difficult, we just signed a new deal ourselves," he finished his beer in two gulps. He noticed her glass was almost empty as well.

"You want another?" He asked and Lux nodded. After he ordered she leaned in and whispered in his ear, "you probably shouldn't get too drunk if you want to have a chance later."

Michael choked on the breath in his throat and she cracked up knowing the effect she was having on him. Neither were virgins when they slept together at 16 but neither had had a particularly good sexual encounter yet. They learned together, taking time to learn each other's bodies. Sneaking off every chance they got, practicing with hands and tongues before Lux got on the pill and they went all the way.

They were drunk that night too. She'd swiped a bottle of wine from her mom's pantry and Calum managed to get a 12 pack of beer and he snuck the booze and his girlfriend into Michael's. They'd played truth or dare, girls kissing girls, boys kissing boys, tops came off, fantasies discussed until Calum pulled Michael aside. Not long after that Lux and Michael were making out and giggling on Michael's bed at Calum's efforts to keep his girl quiet while they banged. Michael's hands found their way into her jeans and soon they were the ones trying to keep quiet. Before long she was sneaking out every weekend to spend the night with him.

"Here ya go," The waitress brought them both out of their thoughts and back to reality setting down two fresh pints giving Michael a once over and a knowing smile at Lux.

"Truth or dare?" she asked him watching his jaw drop at the question.

"How did you know I was thinking about that?" Michael chuckled.

"We've always been on the same wavelength," she teased back. "Come on darling, truth or dare?"

He took another swallow of beer, pacing himself a bit. "Truth," he said, biting his bottom lip.

Lux almost groaned at the sight. She remembered those lips, and it was taking everything she had not to kiss him right now.

"Did you ever feel bad?" She asked, not caring if it killed the mood. She might never get this chance again.

"Of course I did. I knew I fucked up, but didn't know how to fix it. When Sinking Ships came out I spent an entire weekend listening to it while drinking and sobbing. We'd always had difficulties but that tour just broke everything. We were too young and life was moving too fast," he confessed.

"That's an interesting way to look at it. I hope it really hurt, I stopped hating you, but it took years," Lux looked down but didn't pull away when he took her hand.

"I hated myself, I spent the next two years trying to drink enough to forget. I'm really sorry, if that means anything,"

"Thank you," she nodded. "What do you mean we always had difficulties? I was a delight."

"Says the girl who kissed Calum right in front of me at my own birthday party," Michael reminded her.

"I should've known you'd bring that up," Lux rolled her eyes. "What about when I caught you kissing Jaslene over at Ashton's."

"Completely unrelated, you'd broken up with me and went to your grandma's during school holiday. I had no idea you were even back," he protested.

"I forgot how irritating you can be," she griped.

"You used to think it was cute," Michael smirked.

"Did I? Can't remember that." Lux was defiant.

"Remember that time you thought I was hitting on that girl and you pushed me into the pool." He laughed at the memory.

"What about when I caught you wanking off in my bedroom because you thought I was downstairs talking to my mom," she hit back and he blushed.

"Remember how both those stories end?" His voice husky and low raising chills along her spine.

"I should probably go," she told him scooting away from him as she finished her beer.

"You can't leave yet, it's still my turn," he said and she looked at him puzzled. "Truth or Dare Lux." He saw the answer in her eyes before she opened her mouth.

"Dare." Her dark eyes met his with a challenge.

"Kiss me.” He'd barely finished speaking when her lips were on his. His hands wrapped around her pulling her into him as his tongue met hers. She squeezed his thigh making him moan into her mouth. He broke away to kiss her neck when she stopped him.

"Let's get out of here," she panted, before landing a kiss on his jaw.

Michael paid his tab and followed Lux outside. He trailed behind her silently to the hotel listening to her boots click on the pavement. They got in the elevator and Lux winked at him and licked her lips. He pushed the button for his floor while Lux chatted with other guests. She followed him to his room smacking his ass playfully as he fiddled with his key card.

When he got the door open she pushed her way in, taking off her leather jacket and dropping it in a chair. Michael stood there a minute staring in disbelief that this was actually happening. His brain was cloudy with memories and booze, and suddenly he knew this was a bad idea.

"I have tattoos and piercings you've never seen before," she murmured as she stepped closer to him pushing his jacket off his shoulders and it hit the floor.

That woke him from his thoughts and when her lips met his again he was done for. A surge of desire hit him as he deepened the kiss. His hands wrapped around her waist before sliding down to cup her ass. She pulled back, his bottom lip between her teeth raking it roughly causing him to hiss.

"Weak," she laughed at him while tugging at his shirt and belt.

He pulled his shirt off and reached around her to unzip her dress while he kissed and nibbled his way up her throat thrilling at the gasps she made and the way she was pressing her body against his. Lux kicked her dress to the side.

"Jump,"  Michael whispered in her ear. When she did he caught her wrapping her thighs around his waist, sucking a mark on his neck as he carried her to the bed. Michael laid her on the bed, before stepping back to look at her. Lux smirked at him, pulling her bra over her head causing Michael to groan at the sight of her bare breasts adorned with silver barbells through her dark nipples. He fell upon her sucking a trail from one nipple to another as his fingers crept under the elastic of her panties.

"Oh you've gotten better," Lux moaned as he teased her clit with his thumb while two fingers easily slid inside her wetness. He turned his attention away from her breasts to kiss her while he slowly pumped his fingers inside her.

The whimpers coming from her had his cock straining against his jeans, but he ignored his own needs wanting to focus on her. He returned his tongue to her stiff nipples seeking his attention as his fingers curled inside of her stroking her g-spot at a tortuously slow pace.

"Shit," she yelled bucking her hips needing more from him than his teasing. He moved his head between her legs pulling her panties off, leaving her knee high boots on and pulling one leg so it was resting on his shoulder.

"I thought you didn't eat pussy," Lux teased him but her voice was breathy.

"I'm not a kid anymore." He winked at her before landing a kiss on the inside of her thigh. He sank his teeth into her soft flesh and she thrust her hips up towards him. Michael chuckled pulling his fingers out of her and sucking them clean while looking up at her. He planted light fluttery kisses on her thighs working his way towards her core. Lux bit her lip determined not to beg, but when Michael landed a soft kiss on her clit she shuddered and dug her nails into the duvet.

Michael ignored his own almost painful arousal to concentrate on her dragging his tongue through her slick folds reveling in the sweet taste of her desire. He proceeded to deliver a flurry of kitten licks to her sensitive bud before wrapping his lips around it gently tugging and sucking simultaneously.

"Oh shit," Lux squeezed her eyes shut and he forced her legs farther apart so he could fuck her with his tongue. Despite her thighs pressing against his ears, he could hear her cries becoming louder, more desperate.  Returning his mouth to work on her clit he pushed his fingers back inside of her pumping a steady rhythm.

"Oh God, Yesssss, right there, right there," she moaned watching as the beautiful blonde boy brought her to the peak of pleasure. Her senses tumbled as she bucked her hips uncontrollably against his face clutching at his hair curses of ecstasy spilling from her lips. Michael lapped up the nectar of her orgasm until her thighs were shaking and she begged him to stop.

He stood up and looked down at her, a wicked grin across his face as she caught her breath. Next thing he knew she sat up and yanked his jeans down palming him through his boxer briefs. He moaned loudly as she rubbed the tip of his cock through the increasingly large wet spot on the fabric. She eased his boxers down his legs grazing her nails along his thighs watching his cock twitch against his stomach at the sensation. She ran her tongue along the ridge under the head before parting her lips and taking him in her mouth.

Lux bobbed her head, not taking him all the way down teasing him before releasing his cock with an audible pop. "You're not the only one who's learned new tricks," she smirked up at him batting her lashes innocently. "I want you to pull my hair and fuck my throat."

Michael's jaw dropped at her words but he only hesitated for a second. Grabbing her curls he let out a long moan as she swallowed his cock until her lips brushed the base. He went slow at first letting her adjust until they were moving together. Watching her brown eyes looking up at him while her pretty lips were wrapped around his cock was the hottest thing he'd ever seen. She began to choke a little and he saw tears in her eyes.

"Do you want me to stop?" He asked pulling back.

Lux smacked her lips, "I want you to cum baby, let me taste you." She hummed as she began sucking him off again getting turned on by the grunts Michael was making each time she took him all the way down. She rubbed her nipples getting incredibly aroused as she let him use her for his pleasure. It wasn't long before she felt his cock filling up and his speed increasing. With a shout he threw his head back and erupted down her throat. She swallowed most of his cum but some escaped her lips and began to drip down her chin. Lux pulled back and pumped him a few times rubbing her face against his shaft before he shuddered and pulled back. His eyes went wide as she wiped her chin clean and licked her fingers smacking her lips loudly.

Michael had to sit on the edge of the bed before his legs gave out, and Lux hopped up and walked across the room to pick up her jacket.

"Are you leaving?" He asked a bit embarrassed at how pitiful he sounded.

Lux just laughed and grabbed her wallet it out of her jacket pocket pulling out two condoms. She looked back at Michael, his green eyes glazed over with lust, and his chest rising and falling as his breathing returning to normal. The paleness of his skin contrasting with the black ink of his tattoos and the purple hickeys blooming on his neck. He wasn't the skinny teenager she'd remembered fumbling around in the dark.

He kicked his shoes and pants off quickly unable to stop staring. The way she was so bold and forward was incredibly sexy, and not like the girl he used to know. That girl never had the confidence to walk around stark naked in nothing but leather boots and silver jewelry. He could feel himself already starting to stir again.

Lux tossed him the condoms, "I hope you can get it up again so you can fuck me." She ran her hands up her sides to her breasts tugging her nipples while slightly swaying her hips. His eyes followed her hands across her body and she could see he was starting to get hard again. She stepped closer to him placing one leg between his, her hand reaching behind his head tugging his head back so he was looking up at her.

"Touch yourself, but keep your hands to yourself until I say so," she whispered before kissing him. Her other hand trailed doesn't his chest raising chills under her nails causing him to hum against her lips. Lux straightened up brushing her nipple against his lips which he immediately flicked his tongue across the puckered skin feeling it stiffen for him. He swirled his tongue again this time ghosting his teeth across it causing them both to whimper. She glanced down to see him slowly stroking dick which was now hard and starting to leak.

"Turn your back to the bed and put the condom on," she told him stepping back and he quickly jumped to his feet, ripping the foil open. When he turned back around Lux was on knees and elbows on the bed looking back at him, wiggling her ass in the air.

"I remember how you like it baby," she giggled using her best baby girl voice.

His smile transformed into a smirk as he got behind her on his knees teasing her entrance with the head of his cock. She tried to push back but he wouldn't let that happen riding his length against her pussy. She grunted in frustration and tried again, but he did the same thing.

"Quit playing Mikey and just fuck me," she snapped glaring at him over her shoulder.

"Patience babe, I'm enjoying the view." He smacked her ass grinning at her.

"If you don't get on with--OHHHHHH." Michael waited till mid sentence to push deep inside her in one stroke. He closed his eyes taking a second to savor the feeling before pulling almost all the way out and then drive his cock back inside her. Deep slow strokes so they felt every inch of each other, her walls welcoming and grasping his thick shaft as he hit every pleasure spot. He reached around to allow his fingers to find her clit working slow circles to match his strokes as the sounds of skin on skin and their moans filled the room.

"Harder, harder," she gasped begging him.

"What was that?" Michael wanted her to say it again.

"Fuck me harder daddy, make me cum," Lux whined, "please Mikey."

"Oh hell yeah." He smacked her ass and went harder, pounding her pussy relentlessly. His fingers rubbing her clit giving it a couple little slaps which made her squeal with delight.

"I'm so close, right there, harder dammit," she commanded, the sheets tightly balled in her fists.

He felt her body tense up and squeeze him tightly and he kept fucking her through her orgasm, as she buried her face in a pillow to contain her shreiks. He pulled out admiring and running his fingers lightly along her glistening quivering sex before lying next to her on the bed.

She rolled over so she was on her side pressed against him tracing her nails along his chest down to his happy trail for a minute while kissing his neck. When she'd recovered she slung her leg over his hips hovering above him.

She sank down on his cock digging her nails into his chest as she did making him moan out a curse. Lux threw her head back and began to grind her hips. Michael had one hand on her hip and the other snaked up to her breasts. She began to ride his dick. Bouncing and twerking while she rolled her hips and touched herself. Michael watched her through half open eyes cursing and calling out whenever she squeezed him tighter inside of her. He grabbed her hips, his fingers digging into her flesh as he fucked up into her.

"Oh fuck, oh God, I can't," Lux gasped her legs starting to shake again.

"Yes you can, cum for me again baby. Look at me when you cum," he groaned knowing his own climax was getting closer.

"No, no, no, shit, fuck." She tried to keep her eyes on him as her orgasm hit but her eyes rolled back as she began to shake. Michael grabbed her hips, sat up and pushed her onto her back hooking one arm under her knee. Her nails dug into his shoulders as his hips rutted into her chasing his own high.

"Yes baby cum for me Mikey, feels so good baby," she moaned in his ear leaving kisses on his chest.

"Lux, Lucy, baby." Michael was moaning over her. "FUCK." He slammed into her with a shout as he came hard, his orgasm coursing through his entire body. he lay on top of her trembling while she squeezed around him milking his cock. Afterwards he pulled out carefully and went into the bathroom to dispose of the condom and get her a towel.

He helped her clean up and they laid back on the bed sweaty and still panting, her head on his chest. "That was much better than I remembered," she joked.

"You were pretty amazing then too, but that was amazing," he replied kissing her hairline.

They dozed off together like that and when Michael woke up he was surprised to find Lux up and getting dressed.

"You're leaving?" He sat up and started looking for his clothes.

"Don't get up, I've gotta get up in the morning so I'm gonna go," she found her bra and pulled her dress back on. She turned her back to him, "Can you zip me up?"

He tried to sneak his hands inside her dress but she shook her head with a laugh, "Just zip it."

"At least let me get your number, we can talk or something. I'll take you out to dinner maybe," he stammered pulling his pants on.

"And then what? We become friends? Give it another go? Nah that's not gonna end well, I'm never gonna be able to forget how badly you broke my heart. I even have a Grammy on my mantle to remind me that I still kind of hate you." Lux looked almost sad but she shook it off.

"Then why did you come back with me? Was this out of spite?" Michael stared at her in disbelief.

"No, I came back with you because as much as I still kinda hate you there's part of me that still kinda loves you. I wanted a better goodbye for us. This is better." Lux kissed his cheek and turned to go before she stopped. "I also did it because I really wanted to fuck you and I'm glad I did. That was the best sex I've ever had, no regrets."

He swallowed, nodding, not willing to fight her now when he wouldn’t fight for her then.

Michael watched her walk away, their roles were reversed this time. He wondered if he'd ever see her again, or if it was the best ending they could've hoped for. He pulled out his notebook, and began to write his thoughts. He'd find her again in a song.

@spookymashton​ @h0tsos​ @toofadedtofight​ @kiiiimberlyriiiicker1995​ @kchillout​

[lolas-writings]

Ahh I’m so sorry that happened! But here’s me, asking for your project details again lol

(Man I hate Tumblr a lot these days... Copy and paste here we go) 

Oh buddy, you’re getting a real treat today. I’m putting this under a cut because it’ll be quite long. Enjoy!! All songs have a link included so you can listen to them. (Here’s a preview)

Ships Included:

DabiHawks

TodoDeku

ShinDeku

(Very possible TodoShinDeku)

Single Character Studies Included:

Dabi/Touya

Shouto

(Villain) Izuku

Ship Based Fics:

What A Time (Trilogy):

For this one, I won’t give too much detail because it’s already being written but I will give the general overview

A Hawks Betrayal and Dabi/Touya Rehabilitation concept. Also a mix between a ship based fic and a character study of Dabi

Part 1: [Already posted!! Read here if you’d like] Deals with the immediate aftermath of Hawks betraying the league and getting them all arrested. From Dabi’s POV (the entire trilogy is in Dabi’s POV) he begins to question his and Hawks’ relationship while Hawks is a mere ten feet away acting like they don’t even acknowledge each other’s existence. Maybe 65% angst due to present times and 35% fluff due to flashbacks

Part 2: A few months after Dabi began his rehabilitation. Discusses his therapy, goes into more detail about what exactly the rehabilitation program entails, and Dabi has a major breakdown due to an unexpected visit from Hawks. 100% angst, there is no happiness in this installment.

Part 3: About a year and a half after the league was arrested and Dabi Touya began his rehabilitation. He’s doing a lot better, both mentally and physically, and is slowly accepting his new life. Hawks in under major fire in the news, and Touya decides maybe it’s finally time to talk things out. I’m estimating about 25% angst and 75% fluff for this installment because I’m putting these boys through the wringer, they deserve to be soft. (Also, happy ending guaranteed)

Before You Go:

A childhood friends AU where Keigo and Touya are part of the same hero program. They become good friends and are practically inseparable until Touya has a training accident and is presumed dead (by accidental suicide).

I’ve actually already talked about this in much more detail in this post here so you can just read that. That post is also quite long

Rewrite the Stars:

I’m gonna call out @call1998​ because I just woke up one day, sent her this song, and said that it’s such a DabiHawks song. And then we created a fantastic soulmate AU together so she helped co-create this idea <3

So, as I said, this is a soulmate AU, but DabiHawks are not each other’s soulmate.

Hawks met his soulmate back when they were kids. Merely 12 years old and under the commission’s care because they were both part of their hero program. Hawks was the one to notice first, getting excited when he met his soulmate and wanting to get to know him. But they only got that one day together, because the next day his soulmate was gone and never to be heard from again. The commission had him believe that his soulmate moved to America and entered a different specialized program, but Hawks finds out the truth when he’s around 20 years old and snooping around the commission. He finds old files that they wanted buried, and he learns the commission actually killed his soulmate because they saw them as weaknesses, and since Hawks was the “better specimen” he was allowed to live.

Dabi’s soulmate is an abuser who works for the commission. And since Dabi is Touya, of course, he grew up watching his mother be abused by her own soulmate and thought “oh hell no.” After Dabi meets his soulmate and realizes how abusive he is (not only to him but also the wife and kids his soulmate already has) Dabi tricks him into believing Dabi actually likes him. When he’s able to, he brings his soulmate back to the league and has him turned into a Nomu, because while he’s an abusive piece of shit, his quirk is really powerful and could be of use to the league.

Now, for the DabiHawks part. Their relationship is more of a friends with benefits ordeal, but of course they wind up falling in love eventually. They never mention their soulmates until one day, after a mission left them both tired, Hawks decides to confess. He’s sitting behind Dabi, applying a special salve to the fresh burns that Dabi can’t reach himself because he can’t bring himself to confess if he’s able to be seen. When his feelings are finally out in the open, the only thing Dabi asks is “What about your soulmate?” Hawks recognizes it’s not a flat out rejection so some of the tension in his shoulders dissipates, and he tells Dabi how they met when they were just kids and how cruel the commission is for killing him off, solely to groom the perfect hero.

And Dabi? He’s vulnerable and hesitant, because the man he was supposed to “end up with” was a garbage piece of human trash, so he’s reluctant. And self deprecating, because he doesn’t believe he deserves to be loved. So he tells Hawks about how he killed his soulmate, omitting the very important fact that his soulmate was abusive just like his father was to his mother. And he uses it to try and drive Hawks away. But the thing is, Hawks knows that Dabi is a critical thinker and wouldn’t act without reason, that all of his actions have a purpose. So after that night, he searches. They don’t touch again, either, their meetings reverting back to being strict information swaps, but it only drives Hawks to uncover the truth. And he finds it, and he even remembers who Dabi’s soulmate was because he was one of the people in charge of the program that Hawks grew up in. But he keeps it to himself, he has to make sense of things first.

Then one night comes, where Hawks just has to let Dabi know, let him know that he’s not the bad guy he’s trying to paint himself to be. But when Hawks reveals what he knows, Dabi just tries to deny everything, because he truly doesn’t want to talk about this. And then he snaps, yells at Hawks about how he witnessed the abuse his mother went through, how his father broke her in more ways than one, how he vowed to never allow someone to do the same to him. That he accepted the fact that he was meant to wind up alone after he killed his soulmate because the universe is a cruel place to once kind people.

Hawks is having none of that, though. He stops Dabi, tells him he doesn’t have to be alone anymore, that they’re not explicitly tied to “fate” anymore and can in fact rewrite their own story. It takes a lot of back and forth between them, but ultimately Hawks’ end goal is convincing Dabi that they, the two of them who no longer have a soulmate, are no longer tied to whatever fate was “chosen” for them. That they’re free to go their own route, carve out their own lives how they see fit. And eventually, Dabi gives in, because in truth they both know that they love each other, so why not give it a go?

More Hearts Than Mine/Like We Used To (duology):

Okay, this duology is centered around both Shindeku and Tododeku and in the end one of y’all is gonna hate me and I’m okay with that. As a multishipper, it is so hard for me to chose which ship gets tanked in the end I’m so sorry. ((But honestly, I high key have thought about ending it with all three of them being in a poly relationship and like, ya girl likes poly. It’ll most likely happen to be completely honest))

Also, quirkless AU!!

MHTM: This is the first half of the duology. In this half, it depicts the rise and eventual fall of Izuku’s initial relationship (either with Hitoshi or Shouto, it’s so far undecided). They get together, fall in love, and genuinely have a good relationship, but it all goes downhill when they eventually have to break up due to different life interests and Izuku’s boyfriend having to move away for a few years. They knew long distance wouldn’t work, so they decided to end the relationship, and this fic ends with the aftermath of their breakup and how not only Izuku, but also his mother and step father are hurt by the breakup.

LWUT: In the second half of this duology, this fic will be from the perspective of whichever boyfriend had to end things with Izuku. He returns from his travels a few years later, but he doesn’t tell Izuku just yet. Instead, he’s trying to deal with being back and constantly reminiscing what once was. One day, while getting coffee, he sees Izuku and his new boyfriend sitting at a corner booth and overall acting very in love. And it hurts, seeing Izuku with someone else, and he gets jealous. But as the fic continues, he eventually comes to terms with the fact that him and Izuku did fall in love, but at the wrong time and while they may not ever get a chance again, he just hopes Izuku is happy with his new boyfriend. (And then they meet again at that same coffee shop, and Izuku realizes his first love is back in town and invites him to sit with them. And he does, and it’s awkward, but when Izuku’s current boyfriend leaves to use the restroom, he tells Izuku that he’s glad he found someone. And this is only the beginning of the start of all three dating because while writing this out I’ve decided, yea, I like happy endings too much so they all three fall in love.)

Single Character Study Fics:

King for a Day (warning, kind of screamo):

Dabi/Touya character study.

He’s already a villain at this point, and this fic would be a character study of his feelings throughout his mental collapse, his rise as Dabi, and his thirst for revenge.

I actually don’t have as much for this idea compared to some of the other songs on here, but the basic outline is almost your standard “Touya died then became Dabi, his mental stability is compromised, and his primary goal is bringing down Endeavor”. This song is actually more of a “hey this fits a story that already exists” than using it to create one, that’s why I don’t have much on it.

I do, however, want to share my favorite line that I’ve matched with a scene. “Dying is a gift so close your eyes and rest in piece.” Dabi says this to Endeavor because he believes he deserves to live the rest of his life rotting away in prison, but he has to kill Endeavor to make sure he gets punished. Since Endeavor is rich and famous, he could probably get out of prison with minimal damage to his reputation and life, and what would be the point then? So Dabi believes he has to die.

Modern Loneliness:

Shouto character study.

The title alone I think suits Shouto fairly well, but if you listen to the song it’s about felling alone in a room full of people. About not knowing how to connect to others. The first line alone is very much in line with Shouto. “I’ve been thinking ‘bout my father lately, the person that he made me, the person I’ve become.” I don’t even need to tell you why that line fits so well.

So this fic would be centered around the time the UA students move into the dorms, because I feel that Shouto would still be wary and not understand how to truly connect with his classmates. In the end, eventually he’d come to find that it takes two to put in the effort a relationship requires, and though it’s new and scary, he’s willing to do it.

Let Me Be Myself:

Another Shouto character study.

Again, the title alone already very heavily aligns with Shouto’s character. And, as we all already know, Shouto hates when people compare him to his father or only acknowledge him as his father’s son, and this song is about being allowed to break free from past restraints in order to live your life how you see fit.

With Izuku’s help, Shouto is able to come to this realization sooner and grow the confidence needed to finally fight back and regain control of his own life.

Lovely:

Villain!Deku character study.

I’m not even gonna lie, I saw that multiple people have done animatics of this exact concept and it’s very intriguing to me. I’ve never written villain Izuku so I think it’d be interesting to explore that kind of mindset.

That being said, I just wrote down “villain Deku = lovely” in my phone’s notes and never actually plotted anything so I have nothing more to share on this

And that’s it so far!! Realistically, I probably won’t get around to all of these, and it would take me forever to actually make a dent in this, but I’m having a lot of fun with this project. Also, these don’t go into nearly as much depth as my notes, because I basically annotate these songs in order to create an outline so, this is like the lite version.

[animation-recaps-by-sean]

She Ra and the Princesses of Power Season Five Recap

In the finale season, Catra is forced to reevaluate her life, without the sword Adora discovers new things about She Ra, and Horde Prime makes his move. We’re in the endgame folks. Spoilers below.

I loved this season. I love it to pieces. It’s been awhile since I’ve seen a season finale that was as great as this. This was a packed season, but they did a great job of having everything flow together.

The season begins with Adora throwing herself into battle. She doesn’t really know what to do without She-Ra. The rebellion is left in shatter, with Horde Prime forces running amok. I do wonder what happened with Hordak’s horde. Lonnie, Kyle, and the Lizard guy get a cameo in the last episode but the other ground troops just aren't mentioned. Not important but curious to what became of them.  

Entrapta was big this season. Maybe the writers were making up for her being absent most of last season. It starts with the other princesses pissed at the tech girl as they think she only works for the science. I mean they're not wrong. But Entraptra does care for people she just doesn’t know how to show it. She’s also bad at reading people, as she didn’t realize all the princesses were mad at her until knee deep in a mission.

Meanwhile Adora realizes that thinking about her friends she contacts the power of She Ra without the sword. This could have used just a bit more information on how it works, but I’ve seen a lot of anime, I’m used to this sort of thing. Bow, Adora, and Entraptra blast off into space to find Glimmer.

Speaking of Glimmer, she and Catra find themselves trapped on Horde Prime’s ship. I was worried that Horde Prime would be underdeveloped compared to Hordak or Catra, but he is fantastic. He is absolutely in control of every scene he’s in. I’m in awe with how charming and fighting they make him. That dinner scene was amazing. I am amazed with how quickly they set him up. He’s almost like White Diamond, genocidal lunatic with a light motif, like to hijack bodies, but with actual time to develop. Can you believe I didn’t like Keston John when I first heard him back in season one? He’s so great! He plays each Horde clone with the same voice but his acting makes them distinct from each other. It’s like listening to H. Jon Benjamin in Bob’s Burgers than Archer.

Catra realizes that her game of thronesing doesn’t work in an army made up of drones and clones with a hive mind. Realizing she has nothing left, Catra is focused to be introspective and spend time with Glimmer. Thinking she’s about to die Catra teleports Glimmer back to Adora.

When Adora realizes Ctara did something for someone else, she instantly goes into hero mode. She flies into Horde Prime’s base. They split up; Adora confronts Horde Prime, Bow and Entraptra try to hack his system for info, while Glimmer looks for Catra in the holding cells.

Entraptra sees a clone in a pod who she thinks is Hordak, so she gets him out but the clones freaks out being separated from the hive mind. Hoder Prime shows Adora a mind controlled Catra with shaved hair. He has Adora fight Catra, the chip on the back of her neck gets damaged, giving Catra just enough control to jump off the edge. Adora leaps off to get her but it’s only a few feet to the bottom so the both survive; drama queens. Seeing Catra hit sends Adora all Ultra Instinct.

Adora and everyone escapes, even Wrong Hordak (the name they give the freed clone). Catra acts like, while Catra, and tries pushes everyone away. But she realizes that Horde prime can trace her through the chip. While Entraptra works on the chip, Catra apologizes and the two have a moment. I was worried they would drag Catra’s redemption arc and the series would end on a fight between her and Adora like Saskue and Naruto. I am so glad that is not the case. I love Bow and Glimmer teasing Catra about her sneezes. Or Catra bonding with Glimmer and Bow over bonding teasing Adora. And they changed the opening, when Catra and Adora cross weapons, they’re smiling at each and Catra is in the hero group shot and it’s wonderful. Also Catra rocks that pixie cut.

With Wrong Hordak’s help, they find a planet that Horde Prime gave up trying to conquer. This sends Wrong Hordak into an extensional crisis. I love Catra realizing what idiots the best friend squad actually are. Like, she lost to these guys? They realize that Horde Prime is afraid of magic as he can’t understand or control it. Catra then meets a shapeshifting cat creature called Melog, who is a combination of a one shot shapeshifting mud monster, Catra’s own shapeshifting powers from the original series and her pet lion Clawdeen who looked exactly like Lion from Steven Universe.

Meanwhile back on Etheria, Mermista leads a James Bond heist with Sea Hawk, Perfumia, and Scorpia. They’re looking for a clairvoyant in a nightclub, but it ends up as just Double Trouble. This is properly one of the strongest episodes in the show. Horde Prime has started assimilating everyone; including Mermista, Spinnerella, and Scorpia are all chipped.

It is strange that at the eleventh hour Spinnerella and Netossa are given so much attention, but it works. They actually became characters after four seasons of them being joke characters. The show really sells the heartbreak Netossa feels at Spinnerella’s mind control. Netossa has spent the last four seasons cataloging every princesses weakness, a surprising amount is fire. Catra’s is of course a spray bottle.

This is the environment that The best friend squad find themselves in when they arrive back on Etheria. They get around with the help of Wrong Hordak, it’s hilarious. Perfurma is ecstatic that she doesn’t have to be in charge anymore.

While searching the Fright Zone, Adora and the gang run into the controlled princesses. And now that she is connected to the garnet crystal, so now she has op electric powers. Catra all like why could she do this when we were on the same side. And of course Catra also has to fight the water princess.

Horde prime realizes that he can access the heart of etheria without She Ra, and sets out to do just that. Entraptra runs into the real Hordak this time and tries to awaken him, he doesn’t capture her but he doesn’t go with her either.

Bow’s dads discover that there is a fail safe attached to the heart and destroy it. Shadow Weaver pops up and reveals that she knows where the fail safe is, Mystacor. So the rebellion goes on, and Shadow Weaver gonna Shadow Weaver and starts to be little Catra and needling Adora about getting stronger. She even flat says that Catra is holding Adora back. But when they reach the failsafe, Catra realizes that Shadow Weaver was tricking them. She's been here before and went back for them.

Shadow Weaver realized that the failsafe sucks all the magic out of the heart and sends it to the person, incinerating the user in magic. Only She ra has a chance of surviving. Adora being Adora, jumps at a chance to literally kill herself to save the world.

Catra can’t watch Adora do this so she leaves the group. You can see the heartbreak when she says that Adora will never like her the way that she likes Adora. Shadow Weaver goes to congratulate Adora on Finally getting rid of Catra, but Adora is having none of it. She tells the sorceress off and departs on her own. She even leaves Glimmer and Bow trapped in a hologram so they won’t try to save her.

While sulking, Catra sees Horde prime loudly announcing his plans to hijack Etheria. Fortunately for sour heroes, his control is visible as green light. Catra rushes to warn Adora but runs into a properly drunk Shadow Weaver. They rush off to save Adora. They bump into Glimmer and Bow and warn them of what’s happening on the surface. Glimmer and Bow go off to help the princesses, not both Glimmer and Catra have a really nice moment.

Meanwhile Adora sees Mara. Adora is so weirdly excited to sacrifice herself so everyone will be happy. But Mara sadly points that it didn’t work for her. Adora is attacked by a monster the first ones left to protect the heart. Catra and Shadow Weaver catch up and Catra gets Adora out of there. Shadow Weaver does one decent thing in her life and sacrifices herself to save the children she hurt so much. I’m not thrilled about her face heel turn but at least she died. I think there is something about the inherent narcissism of self sacrifice and how Adora shouldn’t do that but it is a small thing.

Entraptra sneaks into Horde Prime’s headquarters so she can unassimilate everyone. She is joined by Bow while Glimmer helps her remaining friends fight her father. Bow fights Scorpia when Entrapia is captured by Horde Prime himself. Hordak is with them. Entrapia encourages him to remember how he is. Hordak gets control of himself again and throws Horde prime over the edge; declaring himself his own man. But Horde prime just mind hopes right into Hordak’s body.

Back at the heart, Adora has a vision; her, Catra, Glimmer, and Bow old, safe, and having fun on the way to Scorpia’s ball. The real Catra appears; holding her hand out while the real Catra cradles Adora’s unconscious body. She confesses that she loves Adora. Adora awakes and says that she loves Catra too. And they kiss and the moment is perfect and earned and I’m so glad they got this to work. I wasn’t sure if the exces would let them do this and I’m so glad they got this moment. Your shipping getting canon is not always necceriassy but it is a fantastic feeling.

Bow and Glimmer had a moment too where Glimmer said she loved Bow and he kissed her forehead. It’s much more ambiguous than Catradora, but in an interview, Noelle realized that yes it was romantic but it was a last minute call, made literally in the recording booth.

Powered by lesbian love, Adora truns into She-Ra activates the failsafe and survives. But Horde primes figures if he can’t use the heart, he’ll kill everyone including himself, purged in the white light of fire. She Ra confronts him and banishes him from Hordak’s mind; leaving him to die without a body. Hordak remembers finding dear Adora as a baby.

Glimmer meets her dad and Catra reconciles with Scorpia. Razz nods in approval as the magic restores the planet. Adora declares that she’ll travel space spreading magic with her friends and her girlfriend.  

The ending is too abrupt. I don’t need a five year later epilogue but just spending a bit of more time with these characters to say goodbye. Catra and Scorpia and Glimmer and her dad get no time which is a big shame. Razz, a huge character last season, being reduced to a one line cameo is sad.

It was also weird that no one made a move to save Angella, when the show said she was trapped between dimensions not dead, so I thought they were sitting up a save her plot line. Maybe it was a censorship thing and trapped between dimensions meant she was dead.

I don’t know about anyone else, but I would love to see this version of She-Ra meet up with He-Man. I love crossovers and the two characters are literally siblings. Seeing this creative team tackling such ironic characters would be great. However, I don’t know if they could do this with the rights issues or if they would even want to do this. I know the popularity of this show has caused Netflix to greenlight two new He-Man shows; He-Man Revelation, a sequel to the original show helmed by Kevin Smith and a complete reboot. I’m sure both will be fine, but it won’t be the same.

This season and series is a triumph. The series started good but it wasn’t great, I remember thinking Bow and Glimmer in particular were very twee. Bow was basically diet Sokka in season one. But the characters grew and took on a life of their own. I’m glad I watched this show; I’m glad it was in my life.

4/4