#well...this sure sucks ass
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beanswithbones · 2 months ago
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that moment you find out you forgot to end the free trial of the "plus plan" on the reader program you use and now have to pay them $110
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All i wanted to do was have a year where I could easily listen to my friends long info dumps abt characters I'm going to explode
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suntails · 3 months ago
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❤️⚔️
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disposal-blueeee · 29 days ago
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VARGASTOBER - day 24 : mirror
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moonkhao · 3 months ago
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hi.
#i know most of you didn’t even realize i was gone#but man…#my mental health was like in a state of 📉📉📉 in the past 30 days like we love being mentally ill and fucking insane <3#it was mostly bc i panicked and started obsessing over possible water damage in my flat kind of out of nowhere#like it started when my landlord came to check my bathroom bc my downstairs neighbours had water stains on their ceiling back in july#which had been caused by their shower curtain apparently but i was already spiraling when my landlord told me so i was sure it was my fault#i was assuming it was bc of me bc i had sometimes been spilling some of my bathwater and i was like WHAT IF IT HAS GONE THROUGH THE FLOOR?#and it didn't help that it has been hot af and very humid in my apartment LIKE WELL OVER 25 DEGREES AND 60% HUMIDITY#anyways i couldn’t shake this not matter what i tried and my fucking insane brain made me think i was going to get arrested for like#flooding the whole building or for causing some sort of mold infestation#i had SO MANY panic attacks; i wasn't able to sleep; i wasn't able to eat; i was on edge and panicky basically 24/7 so fun fun fun :D#and i kept waking up in the middle of the night and HAD to go check my walls or the space below my kitchen#it was compulsory like i couldn't not get up and go check and tbh i would've thrown out all of my furniture if i could've to check for mold#(and shhhh i know how fucking insane this sounds but having a mentally ill brain that's anxious all the time does suck ass sometimes 🥲)#(the worst thing about it tho was that i was SO AWARE of how insane about this i was being and yet i couldn't stop losing my mind over it)#(also i was so ready to move tf outta here bc i couldn't handle being triggered 24/7 which is why my mom let me stay with her last week )#i was so out of it that i couldn't even let myself do the things i usually enjoy... like at all#like watching my shows or spending any ungodly amount of time on tumblr... or replying to messages i got from people who i love#ig this goes to show HOW bad this actually was for me mentally bc usually tumblr and my shows are like my safe place#anyways we finally had a leak detection dude come over today and we had him check the water levels in my walls#and he said everything is fine and he specifically told me i should stop worrying about any water damage BC THERE IS NO WATER DAMAGE#he also said that the weather has just been insanely humid this year so it's not surprising that the humidity levels are higher than usual#i’m still a bit scared about some possible mold but ig this is good enough for now#i am aware how ridiculous this must sound for anyone who's reading this now but couldn't let it go not even with meds so let me live pls :(#TLDR I WAS GOING THROUGH IT BUT I AM BACK I THINK AND I AM MOST LIKELY GOING TO START BOTHERING YOU WITH MY GIFS AGAIN <3#AND I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ANY OF THE HEART KILLERS STUFF YET ASIDE FROM ONE OR TWO PICS LIKE :(#OH AND I NEED TO START WATCHING SUMMER NIGHT ;_;#sabrina talks#@AIRENYAH GIRL I AM SO SORRY I WILL PROBABLY REPLY TO YOUR MESSAGES LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW MORNING ;_;<3
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abyssal-ilk · 28 days ago
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saw your tags on the romance poll dudes edition, im curious how the iron bull romance in your brain differs from the in game one if you wouldnt mind sharing!
hey, thank you so much for the ask!! i'm happy to talk about it, though im not sure i'm going to be the best in wording it, lol
my biggest gripe with the iron bull romance that we have in canon is that i just think its... not pulled off very well. it feels clunky, and a fair bit of the dialogue is more cringe-worthy or red-flagy than it is romantic or hot. i just don't think there were enough moments where the inquisitor and bull sit down and talk about their dynamic for it to be a healthy one to me. they kind of just jump into it with a few vague warnings from bull and then another conversation after they hook-up for the first time. the inquisitor is also locked in as being submissive to bull– he canonically won't switch with the inquisitor and let them take charge because, "it's not what they need.". it feels... idk, icky? for that choice to be made for the inquisitor.
and then, of course, there is the oversexualization/fetishization of the qunari and the racial stereotypes we see attached to them throughout the series. i think making iron bull, the first romancable qunari in the series, have such a sex-focused romance was a mistake. just as i think having taash's romance in datv be the "spicest" is a mistake. no matter how it is written, i think was a mistake. just because iron bull is aware of the stereotypes doesn't mean the fact that he plays into them is written well, i guess is what i'm trying to say. we see this even when dorian and bull get together and their banter surrounding their relationship.
that all being said! the romance In My Brain has more time dedicated to setting up the terms of their dynamic and does not lock the inquisitor in as being submissive. i think there should be some sort of choice between it being strictly sex between bull and the inquisitor, or if it eventually shifts into something else. or even if they start off hooking up and it shifts to not having sex at all but still being in some form of relationship. i know the game is limited for what it can do for various reasons, but i'd like for there to be more choices! and more soft moments. bull actually has a lot of them, but i would like More. i would also like for there to be a proper conversation between the inquisitor and bull about why, exactly, he feels the need to consistently play up the overly sexual/aggressive/clueless persona he presents. or some sort of option to return the care he gives the inquisitor beyond just giving him the dragon necklace. idk! im yapping and im not sure how well im explaining it lol, i'm a better writer than i am an explainer. i just wish it was different
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edlucavalden · 3 months ago
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Southeast asian filipino kabru 🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡 there are so many of you guys omfg
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claitea · 3 months ago
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whoa guys did you see the new cards i really want alto's full art!!
made with this site! art without the text under the cut :D
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#pokemon#pokemon oc#pokemon ranger#pokemon tcg#clai's ocs#oc: alto#clai's art#the thought process during this piece was literally ''NOOO I DONT WANT TO RENDER NOOOOO rendering is fine actually. i dont care anymore''#i tried to come up with a cool card effect? someone more well versed in the tcg please tell me if this is viable or op or sucks ass entirely#i will genuinely change the post if the effect is bad i want my beloved to have ONLY the best#other ideas i considered was smth like. finding a pokemon to play straight away to reference ranger capturing#or an effect that only benefit colorless type pokemon so that alto would pair with flying types that get assigned colorless#but since i wanted the card's name to be alto's Justice it felt more appropriate for the player to gain smth after being damaged#like maybe it depended on the opponents prize cards and how many they'd taken already#the prior effects like the colorless benefit would probably go on a standard ''Alto'' card that doesnt have the extra word appeneded yknow#i put plenty of thought into it haha i was browsing through the bulbapedia articles trying to figure out what a good card effect was#only played like. less than ten matches of tcg i'm still figuring stuff out JDJBFJF#the clouds also!! originally i was drawing generic fluffy clouds#but then it hit me. i named alto after specific clouds. why am i doing generic ones instead of the ones named Alto-Something#so these are meant to be altostratus! i can bearly draw generic clouds though idk how well i pulled off smth more specific HJEHFKF#had a lot to say abt this one i just really liked the idea of an alto card so i made sure it was as perfect as i could get it
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sideblogdotjpeg · 7 months ago
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hey guys does anybody know whats the date today
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waitineedaname · 2 days ago
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hiiii lily what is this ‘orv’ i have been seeing…..
HIIII MIKE. SMILES. orv is Omniscient Reader's Viewpoint! it's a webnovel with an ongoing webtoon adaption and it is making me Fucking Crazy. basically the premise there's this really unpopular really long webnovel called Three Ways to Survive an Apocalypse, and for years, Kim Dokja has been the only reader. when the novel finally ends, the author sends him an email with the txt file of the whole novel, and then suddenly the novel is wiped from the internet and in that instant, the events of the novel begin taking place in Kim Dokja's world. the apocalypse begins and humanity is subjected to cruel scenarios and challenges livestreamed for the entertainment of these powerful entities called constellations, and as the only one who read the story to its end, Kim Dokja is the only one fully equipped with knowledge of how this story goes (or at least, how it originally went)
it is SO good. it lures you in like "ooh this is a normal reverse isekai" and then ends up being CRAZY. it deals with questions about the boundary between characters and Real People and whether that distinction really matters, and it's one of those stories that looks the audience dead in the eye and dares you to look away first. literary devices are made Real (oh fourth wall we're really in it now...) and it plays with narrative voice and pov and unreliable narration in such fun ways. it is ultimately about the value of stories and the value of being a reader and the choice to wrestle with the story that's been written for you in favor of the story you really want to tell. it's also about Kim Dokja having something Deeply Wrong With Him skdlfjlksdjf the journey i went on with him was "okay he's a reader insert who reads novels as escapism, i get it" -> "oh actually he has something wrong with him" -> "oh he has something Wrong With Him" -> "WHAT. WHAT THE FUCK. HELLO. WHAT WAS THAT." I'm obsessed with him.
I read the webtoon first which I think is a pretty effective onboarding point! some of the art had my jaw on the FLOOR it's so cool. the webtoon has adapted roughly the first third of the whole novel so far, and if you want to read the novel just dm me and I'll hit you up with the epub file lol (not just mike but anyone who is interested!)
#asks#puzzlehat#OOOOH YOU WANNA READ ORV SO BAD#i haven't finished it yet btw#according to my ebook app I'm 38% into it which is insane to think about#but YEAH it's so so so so so good so far#the story it's telling is so compelling and the pacing is like. incredibly solid. which is IMPRESSIVE for something this long#i want to gnaw on kim dokja like a dog.#other bonuses: really good supporting cast featuring a LOT of women which is a huge plus for me#soooo refreshing to see so many well written women. god. i love them so much#really interesting character arcs for the supporting cast alongside the main character(s)#im not sure who i'd label the main characters. kim dokja obviously? and the protagonist of the original novel (yoo joonghyuk)#i get the suspicion han sooyoung becomes more of a main character later but i haven't seen her in a while </3#another bonus is that in addition to like. telling a compelling story that is at times emotionally devastating#it's also REALLY funny at times#kdj SUCKS i love him so much <3 he loves being a pain in the ass#he understands blorbo aggression like no one else#kdj reading about yjh for years: this character is so important to me and has gotten me through some really tough times#kdj meeting yjh: i need to KICK HIS ASS!!!! i need to BOTHER HIM!!!!!!!!#anyway. this is a long answer but you should read orv <3 it is changing my life <3#if it helps i think orv has a special appeal for people who enjoy things like hlvrai and homestuck. do with that knowledge what you will.
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miyku · 4 months ago
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ashtonisvibing · 3 days ago
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i've seen the minecraft movie trailer
who was the writer that decided to make steve reference "the children yearn for the mines"
i just want to talk
no ignore the baseball bat in my hands
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cdroloisms · 24 days ago
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Oh I was just haunted by jmah!Dream’s deteriorating mental state
:C my BOYYY
and it's awful, too, because it's not like Dream is in a particularly good state of mind when the prison starts in the first place. and he's in here because he's terrified (and he's in here as punishment) and he's in here because even though Sam hates him--and he's ensured that Sam hates him, and he's planning to do more to make sure of that fact as well (in canon, c!Dream is talking to c!Sam 'all about exile' in those first few days)--Sam will do his job. he trusts him to do his job. he knows Sam, the man that he's worked with for the last month on this project, on making sure this prison is as secure as it can possibly be, one of the final few people to work with him before the events of the green festival, doomsday, staged finale etc. made sure he'd stand alone, just where he was supposed to. this is a Dream that's already been swimming in the lava before Sam travels back in time.
unlike Sam's betrayal in canon, there's nothing slow about what happens in JMAH. there's no ability for him to cope and go yeah, Sam's being kind of serious, but it's no big deal, yeah, this place kind of sucks, but it's survivable, yeah, there's some mistreatment, but I expected that. in an instant, Sam goes from a predictable cog in the machine meant to keep him alive into a stranger hellbent on torturing the fuck out of him, and he has no idea why. Sam is nowhere near as straightforward as Quackity in explaining what the hell he wants out of Dream--he asks for the book, sure, but also for information, also for complete obedience, also for explanations for things he shouldn't know and punishments for things he never did. there is no promise that the revive book will end anything, for this Dream, and no one to give him anything at all but the Warden.
just ,, the lengths to which this Sam is willing to go, the intensity of his obsession, the way he'd be left reeling with no choice other than to endure and wonder why breaks my heart. Dream has no fucking clue to what end this is all for, and i think he struggles a lot with that. worse than just the torture, perhaps, is the familiarity, the sparks of something that is almost fondness, the satisfaction in Sam's voice when he's gotten something and Dream isn't even sure what he's just given away--and maybe it'd be easier to understand if what Sam wanted from him were any more straightforward, if the desire could pan out as something as simple as sadistic pleasure at hurting him or deriving some kind of gratification from making him submit or wanting power or to eliminate a threat or anything, but all that is clear is that Sam wants something from him and will stop at nothing to get it.
c!Dream and identity is already a finicky thing as well as his whole complex about himself and evil--c!Dream thinks he's a person that does evil things to achieve good ends, but he struggles pretty heavily, honestly, with himself-as-evil and being viewed as evil-and-just-evil and actually being the tyrant-villain-monster-snake-that-just-bites, etc, which means that there is a level of vulnerability here when it comes to how he sees himself and builds his identity and the constant, relentless onslaught of . pain and torture combined with Sam justifying it all by Who He Is Innately and monologuing about how he deserves it all, because c!Dream isn't a person that doesn't think that punishment as a concept is wrong and doesn't necessarily disagree that he's evil either. and again. torture self harm box of mental illness. and part of the problem with a Sam that's fresh from Daedalus and then thrust into kind of the worst possible position of reflecting on those conversations by being in a place where he's able to fall hard on old habits to copium his way out of dealing with anything he personally might have done (because obviously he can just Fix It Now) while also having the additional cope of i-am-godsent-to-make-everything-better BY keeping dream in a box, you kind of get a situation where both Dream and Sam are psychologically in pretty vulnerable places and then you're taking a torture machine hammer to those stress points. so it's fun.
i have no clue if that last paragraph made any kind of sense btw.
but ... yeah. even for any character in any kind of state the insane torture contraption of torture efficiency would be. erm. extremely damaging to one's mental health, to say the least. the only good thing for dream i guess is that sam still has his head too far up his own ass to actually git gud at conditioning anyone deliberately and is therefore still largely skating by By Accident, because otherwise his head would've been even more blendered than it already gets.
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bajablastable · 11 months ago
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2 sillies
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misiahasahardname · 3 months ago
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i have no idea how the american school system works so i’m currently trying to figure out what kind of subjects the tales turtles would choose for their highers
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fuckyeahaplatonics · 11 months ago
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Aplatonic culture is feeling kind of smug about the fact that you won't face the struggles people have in friendships because you're nonfriending
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rhaenyra-first-of-her-name · 5 months ago
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Idk what it says about me but the reveal has just made me like Armand more.
Yeah, go commit more crimes, my dear. His sad eyes have bewitched me. I stand with my cancelled wife.
But Armand is absolutely insane. Like he went from abandoning his og plan to rolling with Louis in a matter of days? Never say that this boy wasn't flexible. He is literally sick of everything in his life and is like, whatever 🤷‍♀️
Louis, Louis, Louis...... You are insane too for staying with him for 77 years to spite your ex. You are petty and I love this idea but you are still insane. I think this might be the first time you flabbergasted Armand and me. Love your petty ass, Louis.
Also since Armand let Louis sorta win their divorce fight, after just establishing him as the Big Bad™, for now, this man is forever scheming, 24/7. He is working overtime. Forever a stage director. (Okay, not really. He doesn't have the emotional bandwidth to be an effective manipulator, he's just an opportunist and oh boi, are the opportunities finally opportuniting after the shitstorm of his life so far.)
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