#well worth dressing as a completely obscure character

[bioswear]

Hosted my first gathering yesterday 🥴

[morningstargirl666]

Morningstar’s Rec List

Part 1 - Canon Divergence

To celebrate @klarolineauseason I’ve piled together all the fics I know and love into one place, to share with y’all. I’ve tried to include the well-known classics in the fandom that I adore, but also some more obscure ones. Hopefully there are some you haven’t read!

Deal of a Lifetime by Anya-Paradox

One-shot. Caroline meets Klaus when she’s still human, while on vacation with her father. They have a summer fling while she’s still sixteen, and a few years later after going their separate ways, she finds out ‘Nick’ is actually Klaus Mikaelson, the same guy who’s trying to kill her friends. I loved reading this fic, as it captures all the innocence of Caroline at sweet sixteen and falling for her first love, but also the character development that comes in their years apart, and how Caroline is a little older, a little wiser when she meets Klaus next. She’s in love with Klaus, but she’s not about to let him walk all over her. She’s worth being put first. And she knows it.

O’Holy Night by BelleMorte180 / @bellemorte180

One-shot. Another ‘Caroline meets Klaus early’ au. However, this time she’s a freshly turned vampire, confused and alone, forced to relive everything Damon did to her as the compulsion slowly wears off now she’s no longer human. Klaus finds her before her friends do, and it changes everything. At first, Caroline is aware she’s just a pawn in Klaus’ game, but as they spend more time with each other and Caroline learns of what Klaus wants - and he of who Caroline Forbes really is - this begins to change. It’s a beautifully crafted fic, and I loved how it slowly had them fall for each other, even though it’s only around 30k. And hey, because it’s one of Erica’s fics, you know Damon will get his due in the end. 😈

Their Nightly Ritual by bellyamywinchester

Multichap. Complete. Now this? This has to be my favourite canon divergence fic EVER. Dear god, it’s so good. It’s quite an old fic now, and it may not be a 500k enemies to lovers slowburn that you read at 3am, but it gives just as much serotonin for your brain. Set right after 5x11, Caroline is at college and Klaus has kept his promise to walk away and never see her again. But we all know Klaus - he’ll find a loophole if there is one. And fortunately for us, the loophole turns out to be he promised she would never see him ever again - he never specified about never hearing his voice again. And so, begins an exchange of nightly phone calls where Klaus asks Caroline about her day. Both of them are never even in the same room throughout the entire fic, but somehow this author has captured every nuanced aspect of Klaus and Caroline’s relationship, the insecurities on both sides, the struggle Caroline has in allowing herself to love Klaus and the easy love Klaus bestows her in contrast. It’s just a masterpiece. Go read it.

like a wedding dress needs dirt by coveredinthecolours / @definedareasofuncertainty

One-shot. This is so beautifully written, honestly fills me with joy. The concept and ideas behind this fic are so original too - it’s certainly nothing I’ve seen before. Fresh from leaving Stefan at the alter, Caroline spends her wedding day in a graveyard, burying her past life of make-pretend. Klaus is there, simply because she asked him to be, like always, and the fic ends hopefully, promising a new beginning for our favourite otp.

The Way Back by Cupcakemolotov / @cupcakemolotov

Two-shot. Complete. Another treasure. Having spent a near-distant future with Klaus only for it to end in tragedy, Caroline ends up sent back into the past by Bonnie to fix things before they go so very wrong. Little does she know, she wasn’t the only one sent back in time.

the guilty ones by grim grace

Multichap. Complete. Probably one you’ve already read as its a fandom classic, but amazing all the same. Caroline falls in love with Klaus without knowing he’s Klaus, and as always, things spiral from there.

Give Me Love and it’s follow up Love Interruption by idiot-wind89

Multichap. Complete. A classic canon divergence au in the sense it diverges directly from canon, Caroline and Klaus becoming endgame. To this day, I still vividly remember a scene in this fic where Klaus takes Caroline horse riding, when she’s supposed to be distracting him from her friends’ plots. Which is why I blame this author entirely for my obsession to read as many fics with these two interacting with horses, or riding together once more.

Til I Tasted You by KiryTheStitchWitch / @kirythestitchwitch

Multichap. Recently completed! Bonnie completes a spell to find Caroline’s mate, both of them expecting it to be Tyler and well - you already know how this goes. There is a magnificent quote from Klaus in this fic that honestly had me swooning: “As if I could be jealous of a boy who has no concept of what it is like to touch the sun and then spend a millennium looking for daylight in every strangers’ face.” Like. Take a moment to let those words sink in. Like dear god. Klaus you smooth motherfucker - thank you Kiry, for forever ruining my expectations for men, I hope you’re proud.

Blood and a Quick Murder (and isn’t this how it always is?) by KS_Caster / @ks-caster

One-shot. Has to be one of my favourite one-shots in the fandom, due to its originality and the utter brilliance of it all. Through magical hijinks, Caroline ends up human again and goes straight to Klaus, asking for his blood and a quick murder - hers. This fic showcases the differences between Caroline and her friends, how they always hated vamprism while she never regretted becoming a vampire, despite it not being her choice. It also sees Caroline finally arrive in New Orleans. What more could we ask for?

Red Queen by KS_Caster / @ks-caster

Multichap & Series. Part 3 of the series is still a WIP, but parts 1 & 2 are complete and waiting to be read. This was probably one of the first klaroline fics I read, and it still holds up now, years later. I love it immensely, mostly because it explores so much with the characters. There’s some in depth lore of the author’s own making, Klaus doesn’t shy away from his werewolf side which I ADORE OKAY and Caroline is pretty badass too, seeing through Silas’ lies. Klaus also puts Caroline first, seeking The Cure for her in order to save her from dying, rather than for his own ends. It’s an amazing series, highly recommend.

not for him a watery grave by MyLadyElise

Multichap. Complete. This is a lovely what if au for 3x21. The Mystic Falls gang succeeds in dropping Klaus at the bottom of the ocean, and while her friends celebrate the victory, all Caroline can feel is a paralysing wrongness to it all. So she calls Rebekah, and then she plans a rescue. Absolutely love the idea of this one, go check it out.

The Stubborn Grace of Being Loved Regardless by perfectpro / @helpless-in-sleep

One-shot. I will scream about this fic til the end of my days and then I will scream some more because it’s too fucking perfect, seriously Jenn. How did you come up with this piece of pure perfection? Unlike in canon, Caroline doesn’t become a vampire in this fic and instead becomes sidelined from her little group of friends, kept out of the loop about supernatural drama. Which is probably for the best, as there is no way in hell I could see this Caroline Forbes spending any time in close proximity with Damon Salvatore. This fic explores the full extent of what he did to her while she was human, and at it’s heart, the one-shot is about Caroline’s trauma and recovery. Along the way, she falls for Klaus yes, and - slight spoiler here - there may even be some Damon murder involved offscreen, but’s it’s Caroline’s story told here, first and foremost. And it’s beautiful, so bloody beautiful. Never have I read a fic so beautifully crafted with such fine detail and respect. Honestly, leaves me lost for words.

Wayfarer by perfectpro / @helpless-in-sleep

One-shot.  The perfect little fic to cure the woes canon bestowed us. Years in the future, Caroline is travelling the world. But travelling alone isn’t what she expected it to be, and Paris certainly isn’t wowing her either. Almost deciding to call it quits and leave, her mind is changed when a familiar face appears. Perfect for solidifying these two are endgame, this fic is short but packs a great hit all the same.

she’s a rainbow by sunnydaisy / @little-miss-sunny-daisy

One-shot. Original!Caroline. The relationship built between Klaus and Caroline in this just incredible. They’ve been a couple for centuries, but like all relationships, this one has its struggles, and they work through it and come out stronger than ever. The fic is also so much fun. The Mystic Falls gang are oblivious to who Klaus and Caroline really are, which leads to some great moments.

Wisteria by sunnydaisy / @little-miss-sunny-daisy

One-shot. Another ‘Caroline meets Klaus early’ au, and probably my absolute favourite of the trope. This fic is packed with so much fluff and make-you-smile moments you’ll be grinning madly by the end. Carolines flees to the coast to escape Mystic Falls for a few days, saddened by Matt’s rejection and still coming to terms with being a vampire herself. In a bar, she meets Klaus, unaware he is also a vampire, and they hit off from there. It’s so cute guys, I just can’t. She tries to compel him and Klaus goes along with it because you can tell he finds her adorable, this blond baby vampire full of sunshine and- god. Just read it before I start crying again over the perfectness of it all.

Ghost by sunshineandfangs / @sunshineandfangs and it’s sequel Help me, please!

One-shot, or technically a two-shot if you count its sequel. This is my other favourite one-shot of the fandom. IT. IS. AMAZING. Like seriously, drop dead, scream into your pillow a-m-a-z-i-n-g. Go read it. Caroline dies when still human, killed by Damon. She watches as Elena softens to her murderer, as Bonnie helps him and Stefan turns into a similar monster. Hate and anger festers and grows, until she’s strong enough to interact with the world she’s barred from. As a ghost, she meets Klaus, and with any loyalty she held for her friends lost the day they left her to die, she helps him break his curse. Spooky, rife with betrayal and thus revenge, this is a great read for fellow chaos demons like myself.

Pet Wolf by these-dreams-go-on / @these-dreams-go-on

Multichap. WIP. Come for the klaroline, stay for the wolf!klaus who is a menace and an absolute delight. Seriously. The chapters where Klaus is stuck in his werewolf form and Caroline unknowingly adopts him as her pet is pure genius and the true highlight of this fic. He chews her dad’s shoes. He growls at boys. He watches freakin TV, fur and all. Asdfghjkl- It’s amazing go read it.

Wicked Schemes by willowaus

Multichap. Complete. A classic. Caroline inherits some badass powers from a forgotten relative and is pulled into the supernatural political shitstorm that is New Orleans. Looks like the city finally has its new Queen.

...My god that was a lot of recs. You can tell canon divergence is my favourite au, heh. Now go forth and devour them!

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 308: VIBE: CHECKED

Previously on BnHA: Lots and lots of Shindou idk what else to tell you.

Today on BnHA: Tired Nomad Deku rescues Shindou from Muscular, and us from Shindou. Muscular is all “OH BOY I SURE CAN’T WAIT TO FIGHT DEKU AGAIN AFTER HE TOTALLY KICKED MY ASS THE LAST TIME!! I’M SURE THIS TIME WILL GO DIFFERENTLY SEEING AS HE’S HAD ALMOST AN ENTIRE YEAR’S WORTH OF ADDITIONAL TRAINING, AND ALSO HAS SIX FOURQUIRKS NOW, IN ADDITION TO THE CONFIDENCE THAT COMES WITH HAVING EIGHT OTHER PEOPLE’S SOULS CHILLING OUT INSIDE HIM OFFERING MORAL SUPPORT AND ENCOURAGEMENT.” Deku is all, “[kicks Muscular’s ass effortlessly].” Muscular is all, “[gets his ass totally kicked].” I for one am very satisfied with this, and with respect to all, I would like to hereby declare this post a discourse-free zone. I’m just happy to see my son out here making good use of his FOURQUIRKS, and more importantly beating Muscular in less than seventeen pages so we can all go on with our lives lol.

damn Deku since when were you allowed to look this cool

from this perspective and with the smoke, cape, backpack, and mask more or less obscuring his actual profile, he looks less like a sixteen-year-old boy and more like a grownass man

OH SNAP

we got a glimpse of this in the cleaned-up scan of 307, but seeing both of his eyes looking so distinctively All Might-esque here is... whoa. I mean we know that his face still looks pretty normal underneath the mask and he doesn’t actually have the black sclera, but still, this is an awesome look. mini-Might

lol Muscular

you and me both. I mean no offense, but yeah

so Deku is just standing there silently

typical Deku. tight-lipped and expressionless. mum’s the word. quiet as a mouse. silent as a grave

okay no but seriously this is so weird and creepy though you guys. Deku please say something or else I’m just gonna mindlessly say whatever stupid things come into my head in an effort to make things less awkward

so Muscular is all “I should probably make a cool speech about revenge but Horikoshi couldn’t think of anything good so I’m just going to stand here clenching my fist real slowly”

“I’m not here to go on a monologue” he says, as he monologues about not monologuing

okay you guys I confess I have only read through/watched the Deku VS Muscular fight once because the arm-breaking is just way too uncomfortable for me to revisit. and so as a result, I have completely forgotten Whatever The Deal Is with Muscular’s eye lmao so let me go look it up real quick

okay so it’s a prosthetic, obviously, and he changes it out according to his mood. that part does sound familiar. I just can’t remember which eye is supposed to indicate which mood. don’t tell me I actually have to go back and reread this shit

lol I’m skimming through chapter 75 now and remembering/realizing that I hardly paid any attention to this the first time around because as soon as I found out the villains were after Kacchan my brain was like “TIME TO FOCUS ON THIS AND ONLY THIS NOW AND FOREVER” and yeah. ah memories

anyway so he started out with the flower-looking eye, and then later on he was all

which begs the question, how on earth could I have ever forgotten the most ridiculous panel I’ve ever read lmao

anyway, but so after all of that, I'm only just now realizing that this isn't one of his previous eye prosthetics in the current chapter; this is an ACTUAL FUCKING ROCK that he's just randomly shoved into his eye socket fkdsjlk

so basically (1) I did all of that painstaking research for nothing, five whole minutes of my life wasted THANKS A LOT, and (2) what, and I have never meant this more emphatically, THE FUCK

anyway so now he's leaping at the building that Deku is standing on top of. but he’s not aiming anywhere near Deku though, wtf

(ETA: HAHA YOU BROKE ALL YOUR MUSCLES YOU LOSER.)

...huh

lmao okay then. I hope those annoying citizens in the building next door are watching this go down and rethinking their life choices

dlkdkljk

just keep standing there pressed right up against the window, why don’t you. “WHAT’S GOING ON THIS SUPER CLOSE COLLAPSING BUILDING IS BLOCKING OUR VIEW.” well, folks, we’ve long since known there’s a critical shortage of hero and villain brain cells, but what we’re learning now is that civilian brain cells are also in short supply

OH THANK GOD DEKU IS FINALLY TALKING THAT WAS ACTUALLY UNSETTLING AS FUCK

SO HE’S STILL OUR GOOD, POLITE, WORRIED, CONSIDERATE DEKU UNDERNEATH THAT COOL AND MYSTERIOUS VENEER. for real, thank fuck, because I swear to god if he suddenly started acting like the Dekus in all of the vigilante AUs my interest in this series would have dropped something like 50% lol. just because he dropped out of school and ran away from home and is currently dressed like the physical manifestation of a Linkin Park playlist doesn’t mean he’s not still the WORLD’S BIGGEST DORK okay

I MEAN, THIS RIGHT HERE. THIS IS WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT. HE’S APOLOGIZING FOR THE DELAY

PLEASE FIND THE ATTACHED SHINDOU YOU REQUESTED. BEST REGARDS!!!

OH MY GOD WHY IS HE SUCH A BADASS

something about making bold, confident statements while obscured in smoke?? idk but damn it fucking works

ffjkkl

more importantly, should you tell him you actually need your copy of Shindou in excel format and not pdf?? on the one hand you don’t want to sound ungrateful, but on the other hand what are you even supposed to do with this

this chapter so far consists of like 50% smoke, but on the other hand Deku VS Kacchan 2 had a lot of cinematic smoke too so who am I to complain

OMG IS IT HIS ARMS

IDK DID YOU?! TELL ME YOUR SECRETS. PLEASE, AT SOME POINT THIS FIGHT HAS GOT TO ACTUALLY ADVANCE THE PLOT

OHHHHHHH

IT’S EN’S QUIRK!! OH MY GOD OKAY THAT’S ACTUALLY AWESOME

I CAN HEAR THE SOUND OF DISCOURSE RUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND BUT I DON’T CARE LOL. WON’T CATCH ME EVER SAYING NO TO ANOTHER SIXQUIRK. GO AHEAD, BRING THEM ON, I WANT TO SEE THEM ALL but take it easy though Deku. don’t want to give yourself lung cancer or anything

also it’s good to see that in a very real sense he’s not fighting alone. the Vestiges really did mean it when they said they could appear more easily now. this is on a whole other level

so is this whole next page still En talking, or someone else? because whoever it is sure is chatty

okay, several things

pretty sure it is En, because he keeps saying “I suppose.” for someone who never said two words until one page ago, this guy sure never shuts up. we can’t all follow Muscular’s lead I suppose. oh my god now I’m doing it too

really like the suggestion of Deku using the SIXQUIRKS like tools in an arsenal, because that’s what he’s good at! it’s almost like he’s been training for this his entire life. “you value quirks too much” LOOK HE JUST THINKS THEY’RE COOL OKAY IS THAT A CRIME

where the fuck did all this rope come from

not gonna ask what the fuck that thing is sticking out from the back of his utility belt. Horikoshi will surely explain this

is that a fucking jetpack. I’m sorry Deku were six fucking quirks not enough for you. you can fucking float??? but JUST TO BE SAFE, LET’S STRAP A PAIR OF ROCKETS TO OUR SHOULDERS IDK

-- or wait, is this all supposed to be like a visual representation of En’s metaphor?? OH MY GOD AM I JUST STUPID LOL, DON’T ANSWER THAT. NEVER MIND. NEW LIST!!

rope = blackwhip

jetpack = float

radio = danger sense

and so I’m guessing that this ridiculously phallic thing is supposed to be a flare or something?? and that = the new quirk, smokescreen. well that was a fucking ride lmao we now return you to our regularly scheduled chapter

so now Deku is floating to his heart’s content and thinking that he’ll just sneak up on Muscular and vibe check his ass or whatever

WOOOOOOOO DANGER SENSE YESSSS I LOVE THIS FOR HIM

okay guys, I'm gonna press pause here for a sec to make a serious note, because I am loving the shit out of this, but tbh I'm having trouble enjoying it as much as I want to because I keep getting anxious thinking about the discourse. I know that a lot of the fandom has very strong opinions on Deku's character development one way or the other, and I want to respect that. but I also really have no spoons to debate this topic at all beyond what I’ve already weighed in on. so if it’s all the same to everyone, I plan on staying out of this discussion, at least this week

anyway! that said, YEAH BOI GET HIS ASS

VIBE: CHECKED. CURB: STOMPED. HOTEL: TRIVAGO

-- OF COURSE HE’S STILL FUCKING FINE LOL HE CRASHES INTO BUILDINGS FOR FUN IDK WHAT I WAS EXPECTING

dammit Muscular. how many fucking quirks does it take to beat you?! the annoying thing is that even with all of his cool new powers, Deku is still something of a mismatch against him. anyway r.i.p. to all these poor buildings

OOOOOHHHHH

you guys have no idea how intrigued I am at the prospect of watching Deku try to play both good cop and bad cop here lmao

anyway so Muscular says he doesn’t know, go figure

“I’m not here to make small talk or anything” he says as he small talks about not small talking

OH MY GOD DEKU

are you really gonna talk no jutsu all of these villains from now on?? that last battle really did have a profound impact on you, huh! interesting

you guys he’s really doing it omg

Deku this guy tried to murder a five-year-old literally just for fun. I mean more power to you, but holy shit you’re really gonna try to defeat Muscular with anger management therapy huh

I MEAN

WHO COULD HAVE SEEN THAT RESPONSE COMING dlkjslkjk

FUCK’S SAKE DEKU, I KNOW YOU MEAN WELL BUT THEY CAN’T ALL HAVE TRAGIC PASTS KIDDO

but. I have to admit, I do still like that he tried. probably knew just as well as we did what the end result was going to be, but still. he made the effort in good faith and I respect that

uh oh

why do I get the feeling Muscular just got a whole lot deader

oh my god oh my god he’s doing the “powering up” stance ffff don’t fucking tell me you can still use your fucking arms here, Deku

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY WHAT’S THIS??

okay so basically he’s saying that whatever it was he sensed in Tomura, he doesn’t sense from Muscular. which, yeah, that sounds exactly right. good judge of character here lol

AHHHHAHAHA YESS

WHOOPS, GET FUCKED I GUESS

WOOOOHOOOOOOOO

lmao so apparently this is the belated result of Shindou’s attack from chapter 307?? I’ll be damned. good for you Shindou!! I always liked you buddy. please just take my word on that and don’t fact check that statement

okay lol the one tiny bit of discourse I will allow is that it’s bullshit that he just did that with his right arm. like, I’ll fully acknowledge that. that makes no fucking sense, and I demand an explanation from the Great Plot Hole Filler himself. he’s never let us down before when it comes to continuity so I’m trusting him not to suddenly start now

that said, we love to see a rematch against a boring guy settled quickly and decisively within the span of a single chapter. THANK YOU

I like that Deku implies that his power is being a smart nerd who battles villains using the power of ANALYTICS. he basically didn’t do anything except restrain Muscular and wait for Shindou’s attack to take effect while halfheartedly checking to see if he regretted any of that murder and stuff

(ETA: and almost forgot to mention, he made excellent use of all four of his active SIXQUIRKS. it’s like the chapter title said; this is basically him fighting all-out, and it’s a sight to see.)

also, as cool as the mask was, this just feels right. like, we had our fun, now let us see his face, yes good

anyway, I think this was a good start towards establishing What’s Up With Deku Right Now! so if it’s all the same to Horikoshi, I would next like to take some time to explore Why’s Up With Deku. that, and What’s Up With Everyone Else, Especially Kacchan. por favor

[magratpudifoot]

I am so completely uninterested in drama or in speaking ill of artists, but there is some stuff going down on Dragula that has really made me angry, and I cannot sit back and watch without saying a few things. It's going to be kind of long, and I'm going to call out your cis white lady fave by name, so just go ahead and skip over this if you don't want to hear my thoughts on the matter.

I keep thinking back on the moment when Saint tossed to Koco in the Boudoir while the cast waited to see who survived the first extermination.

Saint: Koco, how did you feel about...doing a normally white character as a Black girl?

Throughout the season, we see Saint struggle with disappointment and perceived inadequacy, not for themself, but because they felt themself to be carrying a beacon for all Black alt drag performers. But here, they have another Black performer* to take some of that weight. Later eliminations would see Saint fall into despair upon receiving anything short of a win, and I want to touch on that later, but their Safe here is mitigated by Koco being in the top for their look. So Saint makes space in a crowded room:

Saint: Koco, how did you feel about...doing a normally white character as a Black girl?

Koco: Truly it felt empowering as fuck. Tried to take the essentials that made Black women feel strong, powerful, beautiful, and then take the same things that made Elvira strong, powerful, and beautiful and transgress that.

Koco didn't get to discuss the stunning braids, the fuller figure, the makeup choices. They didn't get to weigh in on Black women in the media, or the importance of Tananarive Due's voice in scholarship. I haven't a clue what they were going to say—and, as a deeply feminist horror fan, I feel robbed, particularly so now that we have had the pleasure of hearing Koco's thoughts in the Last Supper reunion. I can only guess what they would have said further about their Horror Icons Reimagined look, because Sigourney cut them off.

Sigourney: Wait, I thought you were Morticia Addams.

Hahaha! The dumb zombie stripper doesn't even know who they were dressed as! Let's bond over how much more we know about spooky pop culture than this ignorant clown!

You know what? I'm a white lady who knows Morticia Addams from Lily Munster, and knows Elvira from Vampira from Ivonna Cadaver, and I have more than once looked at a picture of Angelica Houston in a black dress and mentally called her Elvira.

Koco: They cousins, sisters, twins and shit. Whatever.

A significant aspect of Koco's look was about how Black women don't have these icons, and I can absolutely see how Koco might have initially planned to do Elvira and then changed tack when Betty chose her. They didn't model their look on their very favorite horror character, they were adapting an aesthetic to their own experience, and they did a phenomenal job. When they swung those braids around, I actually died, and that look will live in my mind as one of my top 5 favorites from the season.

But Sigourney got her shot in and—if the editing is to be believed—reoriented the conversation on how well she thought she herself did, thereby setting the tone for a season characterized by accusations of misogyny that may or may not have had merit, but that ultimately obscured some very real racism and xenophobia from judges, production, and fans:

- Actual slurs and threats were used by fans against cast members of color.

- HoSo was rewarded for Western pop culture references (the Other Mother, Beetlejuice, Mothman) and punished for specifically Asian looks (the water yokai and mudang looks).

- The Boulets stressed that HoSo was up for extermination not because of a lack of professionalism (for all the hay that was made of those damn wipes), but because Asian drag would alienate their established (white) (American) audience, and apparently offering something that might appeal to underrepresented audiences isn't worth considering.

- HoSo's face has “become an iconic part of Dragula history,” according to Dracmorda, and everyone is happy to sell their static image to prove how diverse a cast the show has, but we can't risk them actually getting on a stage and being unpredictably Asian in a form the producers can't control.

- La Zavaleta is “fiery.” La Zavaleta is FIERY. I cannot, y'all.

But here is a cis white woman telling a room full of non-binary people of color how persecuted she is for being a cis woman on a show whose reigning champion is a cis woman.

(...a cis woman who thought Signourney's Hairy Monster look was underwhelming, I would add if I were feeling particularly irritated by cis white women making every good goddamn thing about us, WHICH I AM.)

Is drag an overwhelmingly welcoming place for women? Nope. Does Dragula have a track record of supporting drag performers of all genders? I haven't seen the first two seasons, but open your eyes and open your fucking ears: There are no cis men in this Top 4. There are more pressing issues than your tits***.

And you know that shady confessional about HoSo only having to do a photoshoot? HoSo went through the haunted house and rode the bull, too. It sucks that Sigourney got hurt both of those times, but you can't pretend like those were trials that she went through alone—both of those challenges were things the entire cast had to do.

OH, and that whole bit where Dahli's lack of consent was repeatedly violated in the Boudoir during "Hairy Monsters." That was just a stunning moment of what-the-actual-fuckery that I will never understand.

So, I want to end on a positive note and circle back to Saint, not just because they have become my favorite drag artist**, but also because something clicked for me the other day: I was listening to the Boulet's podcast trying to come to some deeper understanding of what in the world is going on in this season, and their recap of the first half of Season 4 included a bit where they had a lot to say about how bad it looked for Saint to be feeling some kind of way in the Cauldron after placing in the top in “Ghostship Glamour.” It had struck me initially as a weird moment, too, and obviously Dahli had some thoughts, as well.

If we step back and look at what was going on outside of that episode, though, it makes so much sense. Saint has been saying consistently since Resurrection that they are showing out for Black artists in alt drag and other spaces that have traditionally not been especially welcoming. In “Weird Wild West,” they vent some emotions about being up for extermination specifically because it is Koco they are up against, because a Black performer will be going home that episode. Then in the very next episode, Merrie is exterminated after Saint joined every other cast member to name her as the person who should go home. So by “Ghostship Glamour,” the cast is down from having three Black performers to just Saint--which I am sure they feel partially responsible for, having named Merrie--and all of that pressure they have put on themself to represent and to deliver a win for their community is pushing down, and they don't win even though their look is spectacular, and just about every other person in the room is having an emotional meltdown of one flavor or another... So Saint has a moment that I truly believe is because they want A Black artist to take the crown so very badly, and its just them left now, and if they can't deliver what the Boulets want, then they have failed their entire community.

Evidently the producers talked to the cast after that Cauldron to remind them where they were and what they were doing. I think Saint must have recentered after that week and started just enjoying the art, because their reactions to criticism have been much more measured since then. And I am so, so happy for them, if they have in fact been able to enjoy these last few episodes for themself. Regardless of how the finale shakes out, I hope they take pride in everything they have put out there these last couple of years, as an artist, as an activist, and as a human.

Saint, I see you and I hear you, and I see and hear you out here making sure other Black artists are seen and heard.

* The Merrie Cherry of it all is complex, and I certainly will not be speaking to Saint's perception of that dynamic.

** Six months ago, I could count on one hand the number of drag performers I could name. 2021 turned into a weird deep dive into drag for me, and I put every bit of this at the feet of the That's Spooky podcast.

*** A point I make in this way only because she constantly reminds us that she has tits in this season, and in fact refers to herself and to Betty AS “tits” in the first episode.

[thekitschdiet]

my take on the literary masterpiece, the chic diet

Firstly, I am no one. It’s part of my charm. My fifteen minutes of fame was years ago, when I had an instagram niche meme page. I didn’t even take any brand deals! And my posts averaged six thousand likes! Anyhow. I am hardly literate and well hydrated and carry a small sephora-CVS-hybrid worth in my mini tote bag. Here is my guide on how to live like me, the intermediate kitsch-rat, aspiring influencer. But like, in an apathetic, somewhat dissonant, ironic way. I like saying I live by dogmatic principles. But a lot of it, um, is just eating disorder rituals. But that’s not really important. You’re as hot as you say you are, and as much an authority on what you write so long as you say it with, you know, conviction. It’s kind of venerable how fucking delusional I am, actually. Giving any sort of advice like I’m anywhere close to the ritzy ideal of the amphetamine-areyouami label-american. New York, ideally. West Village, preferably. But I guess the kind of guide I can write is better suited to someone living in a suburb, in a house with the twelve-paned windows. I always thought those were so chic. SO quaint, in a somewhat luxe way. Like, Connecticut vibes. My parents used to drive me up there as a child to buy books and ice cream. Nowadays I’d opt for a matcha latte with novelty ice cubes, but I guess at the time it was pretty sweet. 

Because I popped a Vyvanse at like, 10pm, this next little bit could go one of two ways. I will write the most articulate, brilliant piece of literature of my life. Magnum opus, if there was a skinnier word for it. Or, I will get wrapped up doing something like folding all my last-season knits (which is part of my look, okay! I don’t have a job!) and fixating on a paragraph on how a girl’s collarbones are almost as identifying as a fingerprint, or a signature. I’m not a graphologist, but if you write your A’s with the little tail on top (like on a computer), you’re probably a snake. Nothing personal, just an observation. Also, I do have a biology final to study for. Not that I’m super anal, or even particularly committed to academia, but even in my precariously manicured (read that as separate terms; I did a good job on my nail polish, okay? But I happen to also be teetering on the brink of an epiphany or a collapse. Hence the use of the word precarious.) state, I know it’s important enough I can let one of my countless side-quests sit idle for a couple more days. 

The first section seems only natural to be about hydration. And the whole idea of drinking things, really. There was a section in The Chic Diet about Adderall dry-mouth, which deeply resonated with me. Once I bit off a chunk of a Nivea Strawberry Shine (my favorite lip balm, more on that later) and swished it around my mouth. Didn’t help. Really, really didn’t. Anyway, I suppose that even if it served no purpose for combatting my prevacatingly ingenious cottonmouth solution, I was able to milk a sentence or two out of the experience. “Do it for the Vine”, all grown up! And wearing bananapapaya resin hoops too. Side note, that Etsy shop is a parasocial enemy of mine. It stems from jealousy, which sucks, but hating from inside a club I’m adjacent to is much healthier than being a hateful individual towards people I would, you know, interact with. Daily. Or something. I stopped going to therapy because I felt stupid about going and I don’t live in the right kind of town to warrant vacuous $300 hours. Bitching about my well-adjusted parents and how desperately I wished my anxiety would just “go away” was plainly gross, and a waste. Like, pretty sure almost every problem I have could be solved by a couple painful conversations taking place during a hurricane. Such a shame it doesn’t rain much here. Anyhow, I digress. 

Staying hydrated. It is essential to my character, my persona, if you will; to never be without either an elegant metal bottle (I’m loyal to the smooth enamelled S’well ones, printed to look like marble or a semi holographic solid) or a little 16oz tumbler with a metal straw. Hydroflasks were some of the worst things to happen to society. I want to preface this claim with the fact that I wanted one in the same way a teenage girl wants a new iPhone so she can keep up appearances with her dermatologist-dad friends who still have the XR, by the way. But I ended up spending the money on like, a minidress at Brandy Melville before it fled my city. Or maybe a Fresh Sugar tinted lipbalm. For the better, even though the dress has a busted zipper now and the lipbalm tube has inevitably gotten dinged and dented by the other contents of my mini-totebag. Unlike a car, though, a couple scuffs on your laptop or your luxury lipbalm tube looks kind of cool. Like, you’re not someone who values the pristine, unused quality of an item that was ambiguously intended to be used versus displayed on Instagram.  Now, I’m wondering why this paragraph about hydration is so fucking impossible to stay on track for. I literally drink several litres of water a day, and more tea on top of that. And sometimes an almond milk latte if I can budget it in. Not that I’m so anorexic I can’t afford a 45cal latte. They’re just not that important to me. Anyhow. Drinking lukewarm (on the cool side) water is better than ice-cold. Partially because I just get it out of the tap of my ensuite and I can’t be bothered to wait for it to run cold enough every time, and it just seems wasteful. Plus, there is something so.. skinny about drinking water at an “obscure” temperature. Trust me, I want to know why my thought process is like this too. My favorite tea is blueberry tea foraged in a side aisle at my local supermarket. I love a good commercial, high-end steep or fruit infusion as much as the next girl. Maybe more. My pantry is filled with tins labelled with things like “emerald jade organic” and “magic potion”, which is really just currants and butterfly pea flowers. But there is a necessary glamor about drinking dirt-cheap tea on the daily. Seriously, a box of 25 sachets is like, $3. At a higher point with my, um, Adderall problem, I spent like several times that on pills. I didn’t really need to include that, and could have linked the price point to the cost of a drugstore lipbalm, but I wrote it in. And I’m married to it, stubbornly, as all amateur writers should be when they wittle in a somewhat indecorous little joke. This tea is sooo good because it has a strong fruit-reminiscent taste (not as sweet as a fresh blueberry, but who wants that anyway?), it’s zero-calorie, it’s the most GORGEOUS color ever. The latte, the third drink in my little trifecta, is nothing special. But necessary. The trick is to use a milk frother to whip up sugar free syrup with instant coffee and a little bit of hot water in a glass. It’ll make the most luscious foam.. Top it off with almond milk. My dad is a coffee purist, owning both an upstairs keurig AND a downstairs one (among other more analogue methods, but I can’t name-drop, so what’s the point?), so he hates this drink. Now, calling oneself a plebian is so unglamorous and teetering on self-deprecating territory, dangerously close to insecurity. But I can use it here because I am at least posh enough to have a different pair of earrings for every outfit I could possibly come up with, and I only wear Patagonia if I am in a situation where I just have to wear fleece. Like I was saying. It’s such a simple drink, certainly not a delicacy, and… I had a joke about the word plebian but I keep getting up to refill my water and I fear I have forgotten about it. 

Next section; the importance of a good tinted balm

In the intro I alluded to how a girl’s collarbones function essentially as an identifier, the way a signature or fingerprint does. This is a lie, or at least an exaggeration. But one’s ultimate tinted lipbalm is  actually extremely indicative about who you are, as a person, as a member of society, even… 

If you are loyal to Dior Lipglow, I have a couple questions. One; did you shoplift one tube, once, and refill it with cheaper stuff afterwards? I did that. I consider it one of my better-kept secrets, but now you know. Might as well explain the catalyst for my parent’s first separation now, and the horrifying experience that was meeting my dad’s Manhattan sugar baby (?) at the age of thirteen, wearing an overalls dress from, like, Topshop or something else equally embarrassing. .. Kidding. I digress. It’s such a fancy lipbalm, and good too! It smells like thin mints! But I could just never justify cell phone monthly installation payment money on something I will inevitably talk off. I do own three, but two I stole (before I lost the nerve, somewhat unfortunately) and one, a boy(not)friend bought for me. This is not something I feel any remorse about, because his house was easily four thousand square feet and his sisters had a dedicated all-glass room for their shared peloton. Oil money. Ugh!

My personal favorite lip balm, and I have tried a frightening amount, has got to be the Nivea Fruit Shine collection. The frosted one is shit-ugly. Hideous. But the strawberry one is the love of my life. It’s such a pleasant red, looking healthy and rejuvenated and really completes any look. Only downside is it will always, hopefully not always, remind me of Charles. Kissing Charles, specifically. And him asking me what lipbalm it was, because he knew I was somewhat frivolous and definitive and would have a very long answer. But for whatever reason, I simply stated it was from “out of town”. Not really sure why I said that, but it plagues me (minorly) to this day. Of all the things to make up.. .. The peach one is a perfectly demure spring classic shade. Cherry exists too, but the only tube I have ever had the fortune of owning was purchased in Costa Rica and lost somewhere on the way home. Honestly tragic, it was the juiciest shade. Blackberry is perfect too, but I have to layer it with either peach or untinted lipbalm to avoid what I imagine TooPoor would choose if she believed in tinted lipbalm. I don’t mean this hatefully, I think she’s a queen, but super dark, smudgy makeup suits the eyes better in my opinion. Or something. Or something.

Afraid to bore the reader, I have to move on now. Maybe at a later date I will release an addendum on my ultimate lipbalm buying guide. But also, that is so deeply personal (and everyone needs the excuse of “hunting for the perfect staple shade!!”), so it is really not my place to have any authority on something so intimate and subjective. Etcetera. 

Moving on; Decorating your room

Here is a section I lifted out of my memoir document. It fits, because as enigmatic as I hope I am, I am also quite unchanging.

 I just pushed three hangers and two tiny strappy tops with the tags still on, off my bed. Most nights, all, these days, actually; I spend in my large but cluttered bedroom. I have a little ensuite with a jetted tub I’ve never used because I just never get around to it. There’s a plush grey rug, spanning the expanse of the room (covering an ugly cherry wood that doesn’t match the rest of the house; no clue why. I never asked, and the previous owners were eager to sell so they could finally ditch this town and retire in Montreal for the bagels, or Hawaii for the monk seals. Point is, I’ll never know) with loose beads and loose pills and little shards of glass from plier-crushed beads. I vacuum every day. The whole room tells you exactly the kind of person I am; the clutter I possess, the encapsulation of the projects I start, start, start and the hours I don’t sleep for and the clothes I tried on (these to sell, these to cut up with kitchen scissors; thrifted lululemon and aritzia and heaps of knits and plaid fabric..) I would not say the room is a mess. Lived in, maybe. Chopsticks and mugs and gum wrappers. Single dangle earrings. I just finished the last of my Creme Brulee eos lipbalm; disguised as a relic of 2015, I was gifted it Christmas of ‘20. I think my next waxy conquest will be a tinted Burt’s one I palmed a while back, before I lost the nerve. Peering around the room you will see shopping bags strewn about the mouth of my walk-in closet. Every surface has something shiny or colorful stacked up on it. Cluttered, busy, but intentional. Except for the walls, which are bare. Bare and gray and miles-tall when I lie flat on my back, high out of my mind, willing things to change but knowing I’m responsible for a first step I will always be too scared for. Bare, pristine, no gumtack. Empty, Like they’re waiting. I wait around a lot. It makes sense. That was an awful lot of words about my stupid blank walls when truly it does not bother me that much; I really just don’t get around to it. I have other things on the ground to tend to, like post-email nausea, addressing envelopes, marrying wire and bead.  Writing a document I care about because I am determined and I am alive, alive, alive, goddammit. 

Excerpt over. The memoir is coming out when I get famous, or something earth shattering happens. Like I become the world’s least remarkable entrepreneur, and I get retweeted by Colorpop. I don’t want to be the next Elizabeth Wurtzel. I read two of her memoirs one restless night, absorbing it to make up for the nutrients I didn’t that day (you can laugh. I think that is pretty clever), heart breaking a little bit. She writes about her struggles so intrinsically, you either get it, or you don’t. Anyway. She had the books and the fame from it, and she wrote more memoirs than I think a single person should. That is admirable. Aspirational, even. But I do not want to be like her. Where was I? Oh. Yes. Decorating/adorning/filling your room. Your room should serve as the kind of place to watch a movie (if you believe in film. I don’t) and put on ridiculous glittery eye makeup, or smoke an ~artistic cigarette~ or stay up all night on the phone, which is different from staying up all night simply on your phone. Chatting with someone you are tepidly in love with is much more exciting. Not chic as the whole affair is so juvenile, but fun regardless. It’s somewhere to keep your worldly possessions, too. I know I have a lot! Also, it is kind of thrilling to hide things in your room in little crevices only you know about. Now, unfortunately, everyone reading this will know too. But, like, I trust you not to really.. do anything about it. I keep my extra juul pods in the sliding box my apple pencil came in. That box is almost more useful than the pencil itself. I’m somewhat morally opposed to the iPad. Whole culture is so embarrassing! I have a tea tin with an ounce of golden teacher shrums in it. This is tossed in my closet among tins filled with other things, like lace trim and buttons. Which makes it actually a pretty terrible hiding spot, I see now… Anyhow. Keeping benign little secrets like that is so fun. You can tell I don’t have siblings. I sort of wish I did, but it is easier to believe there is something aristocratic about being an only child. Not sure if older-sister me would be egalitarian enough to share things. But that’s prophesying, which is kind of a waste of time. I live in the now, in a room positively cluttered with meaningless things that mean the world to me, chewing on my lip because my mouth is just so dry and 5gum is just not an after-8 indulgence. To live truly kitschly, you have to have somewhat hideous decor. Now, do not confuse dissonant, or incoherent, with what I mean by “hideous decor”. The kitsch room has as many surfaces to look at as possible, while also shying away from too many shelving units. Then you risk your room looking like a storage unit or something. When my mom renovated (re: paid someone to do it) our New York house so we could sell it, all our stuff was stacked up in a Cubesmart self storage. It was sort of horrifying, seeing my childhood home reduced to plastic storage tubs piled what felt like thirty feet high. Anyway. It’s just not an  inviting way to store things; I imagine it makes your room look like your stuff is all trapped in gelatin. The more fussy, tiny things you have out in the open, the better. Nail polish. Earring trees. Bowls full of rings and lighters and water color pans perched on your windowsill. A rack with the tackiest assortment of knits and bucket hats and baguette bags. And so forth.. Quickly surveying someone’s room is so telling. Bonus points if all your books are spine-in, except for your favorite ones, because you don’t want people to get the wrong idea. (that you read). 

[mirobami]

Hello! May I request a kind of sequel? to the bami clan(background and reader being like let’s get yall some teddy bears) fic? Just fluff you know, y/n taking all pf them out to see things and buy them ice cream??? and the song being Runaway-AURORA

Your fics are just *chef’s kiss* ✨beautiful✨

━ TAKING OFF THE MASK

CHARACTER(S): The Bami clan

SONG: Runaway (AURORA)

A/N: Hi hi, THANK YOU SO MUCH!! Honestly, I wanted to write a second part too so >:D you read my mind (this was longer than what I expected), let’s get started! 

The day Y/N had said that they’d be able to go through their childhoods, even for a short time, was arriving sooner than anyone had expected. They were all eagerly waiting for that day, more than any of them had thought. As much as they tried to seem casual, it was clear that they wanted one day in which they didn’t have to worry about money or poison or anything obscure. 

Y/N had given them the place where they had to meet up and the time as well, but what she didn’t expect was them being there earlier than what she had expected. From what she could see, there was still a bit of awkwardness amongst everyone for the sole reason that they had been against each other and now they were all supposed to hang out with one another. It didn’t matter, she’d find a way to break the ice.

“All right! So today’s plan is to go to Build-A-Bear, eat as many sweets as we can, let you buy literally anything that your parents never let you--within reason, we’re not taking home a sword--I’ll pay for it all, don’t worry.” The bright smile on Y/N’s face made them all feel more elated.

With those words, they followed Y/N around like ducklings to see where she’d lead them until she led them to a mall. So many people were bustling around, shopping bags in their arms as they talked with their companions or just bopped their heads slightly to the beat of the music overhead. The songs were completely different than what they all usually heard so they had to stand there for a bit to drink it all in.

“This is a commoner mall?” Miyo asked.

Y/N blinked. “Please don’t tell me your malls are bigger, I’m gonna feel more broke.”

Miyo made a pained expression, as if trying to say no when in reality it was true, their malls were so much bigger. Y/N sighed and pulled them all towards the Build-A-Bear workshop. Inside, there were already a couple of people picking out bears and talking with the cashier. It seemed like the clan had never seen anything like it before so when Y/N let them loose, they all tentatively walked in before walking everywhere. 

Y/N went over to the cashier and watched as they all started talking with one another, mingling for the first time and bonding over bears they wanted. Yumi, Ibara and Miroslava were hanging around the bears before picking up the ones they wanted and walking towards the station where the bear would get stuffed. Rin, Sumika, Erimi and Rei were all talking casually with the bears in their arms, looking through clothes. Miyo, Miri and Nozomi were picking out clothes, showing each other the cute clothes they found. Kirari and Ririka were already dressing their bears up, having chosen the same bear but with different clothes. They all seemed to be having fun, smiles spreading on their faces.

The price was higher than what Y/N had expected, but it was worth it if it meant they’d be happy. Sure enough, they were chattering happily as they walked out of the store. 

“Okay, what do you guys want to do next? I’m thinking playground but if you guys want to buy something else here, we can do that too.”

It was a unanimous vote on the playground. All of them went to a playground that was near Y/N’s home and it was surprisingly empty. Y/N was also surprised, considering there were usually tons of kids playing there, but not today. It’s like the universe had decided to let the clan have fun for that day. Y/N held out her hands. “Give me your stuffed animals and go, I’ll take care of them.”

With the biggest smiles ever, they all let Y/N take their bears and immediately went towards the playground. It seemed like none of them even touched sand on a playground because they were playing with it rather than the structures. Miyo was on the swings with Sumika and it was clear from their laughter that they were enjoying it. Rin and Ibara were making a sandcastle with Terano, who was sitting on the side of the playground, unable to go and play on the structures. She didn’t mind, she was just determined to build a better castle than the boys. 

As Y/N continued watching, she silently told herself that whatever the Elders did to these kids, she’d have a good long chat with them and perhaps hire some people to toss them into a retirement home. It was clear that these kids had never had a real childhood and here they were, having the time of their lives like they never had before. It made her sad at first and then happier because she was the one doing it. No one had done it for them, so it was up to her to do it and she couldn’t be more content. 

Miri and Erimi were on the slides while Yumi and Nozomi were having a battle on the monkey bars. Miroslava was supposedly the judge for the castles along with Rei and they were both grinning as they ever so sneakily poked Rin and Ibara’s castle when they weren’t looking. The castle didn’t crumble but one wrong move and it’d be destroyed. Sure enough, a few minutes later, Y/N heard a cry of agony and it was Rin and Ibara lying face up, their castle destroyed as Miroslava and Rei started laughing with Terano. 

There was a sound of an ice cream truck nearby and Y/N called out, “Do you guys want ice cream?”

The clan suddenly felt bad, considering that she was paying for all of them but it was like she could read them. Crossing her arms, she said, “I wouldn’t be taking you guys out if I didn’t know that I’d have to pay for you. Go and order, I’ll pay for you.”

A few moments later, they were all sitting with their ice creams, happily eating them as they concentrated on the landscape around them. Y/N had a gentle smile on her face as she watched them look at everything with childish wonder, obviously never having been there. Yumi and Rin were sitting near her legs and they both leaned against her, making her heart clench. Tear away their jobs and they were just so adorable. “So what did you guys think?” 

“Can we come here again?” Kirari asked immediately and Terano nodded in agreement. 

Y/N smiled and chewing on her last piece of ice cream cone, she said, “Of course. I don’t mind.”

“Can we go to your house at some point too?” Yumi asked nonchalantly. “We want to hang out with you there!”

It seemed like the clan also wanted this and with a laugh, Y/N replied, “I guess we can do that too and sleepovers. I don’t mind at all, you guys deserve it all.”

Not only did Y/N care for them, the entire clan cared for her just as much if not more. Here she was, doing so much for them and she didn’t even expect anything back. So this was the feeling of love they had never felt. Just a rush of adoration swelled up within them all at this girl who gave them a chance when no one else would. This was the girl who they would be able to call home at some point, just not yet. However, they all already knew from one day with her that they wanted to be around her. That’s exactly what they planned to do. 

Now take me home, home where I belong, I can't take it anymore...

[misterewrites]

Intro to Caitlyn 101 (Mirror’s Edge)

Summary:  Caitlyn is a thief looking for the next big score. Used to taking wristwatches and wallets from rich folk, she's aiming to take down bigger game as she discovers the hidden magical world within her hometown. Her first mark is an unassuming shopkeeper and his collect of ancient relics. All set with a plan, Caitlyn makes her move. Though plans rarely go off without a hitch.

Hello everyone! E here, hoping you are all well and staying safe. So the next chapter of my little side project is here! Honestly wasn't planning on getting back to this so soon but I was having fun worldbuilding and character creating and here we are. You can blame my friend @hains-mae for enabling me.

Right so the next thing I write will probably be the part two to this then the next chapter of the Underground. Umm that's really it for me so have a great week, be safe, wear your mask, take care of yourself and your loved ones. Please feel free to reblog, share, leave kudos or leave comments with things you liked or feedback if you read it on a03. I promised I'd try to promote myself more and it feels weird haha.

E is out, have a great one everyone! and here’s the link to the doobly do 

---> https://archiveofourown.org/works/30599756/chapters/76014323

There was an arrogance that seemed deeply etched into every aspect of the magical world. She stood among valuable, ancient relics from throughout human history: Vases from Greece lined the shelf above her. A row of Roman gladius blades in various states of decay with only a flimsy glass case between them and Caitlyn’s pocket. Tarnished Victorian era slivered lockets left about like loose change.

Millions dollars worth of the past and she, a stranger, was left unattended with it all.

Technically she wasn’t supposed to be in here with the locked door and close sign but the fact in the 5 minutes it took her to pick the lock and scout the first floor without a single soul attempting to stop her really was a testimony to the haughtiness of the ‘shopkeeper’.

It had been only few months since she saw past the false reality that was superimposed onto hers and she was still readjusting: Magic was real. Elves, dwarves, little halfing folk? Real. People shooting bolts of lightning and flames while riding storm clouds? Real. The guy who kept awkwardly hitting on her every time she tried to get a hotdog from the cart at the corner? Just a regular creep BUT could’ve been magical.

Even their currency was a show of their excessive wealth: Sliver, gold, platinum coins Actual platinum traded away like it was nothing! People starving and helpless on the streets and these bastards just walked with some of the rarest metal on the planet in their pockets like chump change.

Anger bubbled within her stomach along with self righteousness and a bit of her breakfast but she took a deep calming breath, closing her bluish gray eyes. ‘Calm down Cait’ she scolded herself ‘This isn’t the first time you’ve seen excessive wealth squandered and wasted. You’re here for a job so do it and never come back.’

She glanced around the waiting room she found herself in. It was off to the side of the shopping front andthere were very few things of interest in the tiny room: Some old, tattered chairs that had seen better days. A very, very tacky abstract painting hung over a bricked up fireplace. There was a scattering of magazines older than her with loose stables and free roaming pages everywhere.

A place of show and very little use.

“Hello my angel.”

Caitlyn seized up. She had been so caught up in her rage she hadn’t been paying attention to anyone coming down the stairs. Three stories with a handful of people about and nary a sound could heard. Must be some sort of magic.

She shook herself out of her stupor, slowly exhaling to calm her nerves. She forced her lips to curve into the cutest, lost smile she could muster. She opened her purple jacket a bit further so the guy could get a clearer view of her tight white tank top and running shorts.

“Helpless. Remember you’re helpless.” She whispered to herself before whirling about, her long black hair with dyed purple coloring flowed behind her gracefully as if she was an actress in those stupid hair product commercials.

“Oh!” she spoke with mock surprise, scrunching her face cutely as possible “I’m so, so, so sorry! I’m lost and the door was open and sorry!”

She leaned forward, sheepishly scratching the back of her neck as she gave whoever it was a better view of her outfit.

Hook, line and sinker.

“No problem sweetie. No need to lie to me.”

Hook, line and sunk apparently.

She blinked, unsure if she heard what she thought she heard. She glanced up to find a strangely dressed man with the goofiest grin.

He was cute in a ‘I dress as an obscure, indie character for cosplay’kind of way: His messy, unkempt black hair sat under a black fedora. He wore a long black trench coat that had seen better days. At least he preferred more colors than black on black. His collared shirt was a nice baby blue with an equally nice light brown vest. Black dress pants because men’s fashion is incredibly boring and shiny loafers to completed the look. Whatever the look was.

She expected him to be taking a good look at her attire.

What she found was him staring at her.

His warm dark brown eyes were soft, gentle and he refused to break his gaze from her bluish grays even though there were more tempting sights on offer.

She was on the back foot. No wandering glances, no self pleasured smiles. Not even a creepy chuckle. Just a strangely dressed, inch shorter guy looking like he just found the love of his life in this moment.

“I…” she cleared her throat “Umm….did you hear me?”

He gave a quick nod “Yeah. You broke in and you were trying to cover your tracks.”

It wasn’t that he guessed correctly what was she up to that threw her off. It was how casually he said it. More discussing the weather than committing a felony.

She raised an eyebrow, not sure how to proceed from whatever this was. There were always some people who caught on about her intentions fairly quickly but no one had ever been so….indifferent about it.

“I don’t work here.” the man offered, slowly closing the distance between them but leaving the doorframe wide open “I really don’t care that you’re here to rob the place.”

This has to be a trap. This had to be. No one was ever this….laidback. Were the other goons on the side waiting to jump her when she bolted? Was she on camera and he was letting her go knowing full well he had all the evidence he needed to track her down?

Or maybe he really didn’t care. He seemed more interested in talking than stopping her and there was this strange presence about him. A calm she’d never felt before even when her parents were alive. It was odd and foreign to her but she felt safe. Protected.

She shook her head, slowly inching closer to the doorway. The man made no attempt stop her. He just stood there, smiling, hands in his pocket.

The rational part of her brain said to run. This whole thing was botched and it was better to cut her losses than find out first hand what magical creatures could do to her. The less rational side of her head told her to wait, to talk this guy. Lying was obviously pointless but she had a feeling he would answer any questions she’d had and she had plenty.

“So…” she rose a suspicious eyebrow “Not gonna stop me?”

He shook his head “I wish you’d stay but I understand if you don’t want to be found in Andor’s shop. He’s one of those new elves. Less honor more power.”

She blinked. He said elves right? Just threw it out there like it was an everyday matter of fact and not a deeply held secret of her hometown.

“Elves aren’t real.’ Caitlyn said matter of fact.

“We both know better than that.” The man gave a bright smile.

“What do you want?”

The words spilled out of her mouth despite her best attempts but this guy was throwing her off so badly she forgot how to function.

“Talk to you of course.”

The worst kind of people were the sincere ones. They were sappy and gooey. They just so happy it was sickening. They had to be up to something. They had to some scheme or scam or something they were waiting to drop on you. No one was that happy, that purely honest. They were the liars who were so good they convinced themselves they were good people. No one was good and everyone had a dark corner in their soul they hid from the world.

Caitlyn knew she had plenty in whatever was left of her ratty soul.

“And if we talk? Will you let me go?”

The man nodded as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Caitlyn licked her lips anxiously “Promise?”

Promise? What was she 12? No one kept their promises. Not even her.

He placed his hand over his heart “Cross my heart.”

“Let’s talk,”

He jerked his head towards the door “Outside. Don’t want you to ruin your heist.”

-----

Today was not going how she was expecting. She was thought she was going to break into an elf ran front, scout the area and come back in the middle of the night. She hadn’t been expecting to have coffee and bread with a random stranger on the street.

Well she had coffee, mystery man opted for hot chocolate.

They stood in a strangely comfortable silence a block from Andor’s. The man offered to pay for whatever she wanted and she took him up on it. Couple of baked goods, a sandwich for lunch, some water and of course her cup of wake up juice. If he was mad at her for her splurging at his expense, he hid it well. He just took his coco and some fancy elvish bread. Looked good but Caitlyn wasn’t up for trying other beings food. She didn’t know how it would sit with her stomach.

The elf who ran the cart, a few months ago human to her, waved goodbye to the pair as he counted the human cash the man gave him.

The trench coat cosplay stood patiently, sipping his drink and waited for her to break the silence.

She refused to break the silence first. Not wanting to sound too eager. Eagerness was a weakness and this guy was already throwing her off her rhythm.

“I’m Finnrick by the way.”

She turned to him, unsure if he was messing with her or not.

He gave her the same goofy smile “Finnrick Drift, private investigator.”

“Ah huh.” She nodded slowly “So you’re a magical P.I.? Like elves cheating on their wives, dwarves dodging their taxes P.I.?”

“Sometimes.” He shrugged his shoulders “Ironically elves like dodging on their taxes more than dwarves.”

“Right.”

“You’re new to the whole other side of Newton Haven huh?”

She glanced at her coffee “Lived here my whole life. Really makes me wonder if I lost my mind.”

“Don’t worry, we’re all mad here Alice.”

Why was she talking to him? Why was she being honest? This was weirder and getting weirder every passing second.

Finnrick changed subject “So, robbing Andor? Any particular loot you are after?”

Caitlyn narrowed her eyes “Trying to fish something out of me Finny?”

“Guilty as charged” He beamed with pure happiness “Don’t want you wasting your time on shiny trinkets he cares nothing about.”

Caitlyn remained silent. She wasn’t used to such transparency. Normally this would be the point where the guy would lie or pretend to not have heard or awkwardly switch the subject but Finnrick answered openly and honestly. So far.

“So” Caitlyn straightened up, pulling her jacket wide open “What do you think? Great outfit right?”

Finnrick turned to her with a grin, his cheeks turning a pinkish hue as his eyes locked onto hers “Your body is absolutely lovely but your eyes even more so.”

Caitlyn could feel the flush coming. She coughed loudly, focusing on her drink as she willed the embarrassment away.

Finnrick chuckled lightly but returned to his drink. The silence returned, still comfortable as before.

This is was bad whatever this was. She needed to regain some level of control and stop acting like a teenage girl on her first garbage fire of a date.

“So” she cleared her throat “Mister P.I. what would you recommend taking if not all those millions of dollars of historical items he leaves about?”

Finnrick crushed the foam cup effortlessly as he gestured to the third floor of the shop “His office has a pretty simple safe. He keeps loads of paperwork. His various contracts, accounts, treasure hoards”

Caitlyn scoffed in disbelief even though her eyes shone with excitement “Treasure hoards? Elves? I thought dragons were the hoarders. Weren’t elves supposed to be above all that lovely corruption?”

“No one is above corruption.’ Finnrick answered “Elves are just like everyone else.”

Caitlyn crossed her arms and leaned back with a cocky swagger “And why, pray tell, would I care about boring paperwork?”

“Because it really hurt him in the pride.”

Damn Finnrick was good. Not only she was eager to learn more, she could already feel the smug satisfaction of bringing a powerful prick down a peg fill her cause.

Finnrick seemed to notice this because he went on “Andor is a young elf. 100 years give or take.”

“A hundred years is young?”

“When you live a thousand years every other race is a child to you. Andor’s old man is a swell guy. He’s one of those good elves you see in Tolkien.”

“Tolkien?” Caitlyn furrowed her brow “He wrote the books that those Lord of the Rings films are based on right?”

“Yeah actually.”

“Oh and the Hob…”

“We don’t talk about that.” Finnrick quickly added “But see the problem is Andor’s old man doesn’t know his son has become the small time crime lord. Thinks he’s running an antique business selling off old junk that was gathering dust in the family’s attic.”

Something clicked into place for Caitlyn “Wait. Junk from the attic? You mean all those relics on the shop floor?! THAT’S OLD JUNK!?”

Finnrick gave a casual shrug “Elves are weird. Andor don’t know shit about selling, all his money comes from his illegal business practices. That’s how he keeps the shop afloat.”

“I see” Caitlyn spoke, her bluish grays sparkling with mischievous intent “If those records disappeared, his shop sinks and he has to run back home to daddy.”

“And out of the city” Finnrick finished with a smile “And those records are pretty valuable to loads of people. Easier to fence and less messy to explain than a long lost Greek vase showing up in someone’s private collection. You’d get good prices for those hoard locations alone. Better than trying to carry tons of stolen and lost treasure back to your house.”

Caitlyn eyed Finnrick carefully “And you’re doing this out of the kindness of your heart? Trying to do your ‘civic’ duty to our fair city?”

“Among other things” Finnrick admitted “But mostly for the greater good.”

“Pfft, greater good? Yeah sure buddy. Like you know what’s the greater good.”

“Will you do it?”

Caitlyn paused, allowing all this information sink in. It was much better than she had planned and while she wasn’t sure of Finnrick’s angle, he seemed honest enough. Of course everyone seems honest enough the first time you meet them.

“Let’s say I do” she spoke, placing her hands on her hips to play the part “What’s in it for you?”

“A favor” He replied simply.

She rose a curious eyebrow “A favor? It’s not date with me, is it?”

“No, I plan to earn that one myself.” Finnrick answered cheerfully.

Caitlyn coughed “Fine, good. Not a date. Least you’re not a creep. But a favor is pretty vague.”

“It’ll be simple I promise.”

Caitlyn narrowed her gaze suspiciously “You promise?”

Finnrick put his hand over his heart again “Cross my heart.”

Caitlyn took a moment, weighing the pros and cons of the situation.

Caitlyn offered her hand towards the trench coat cosplayer “You got yourself a deal.”

He gently took her hand in his own and gave it a firm shake. She was surprised when, as he pulled back, she felt a strange metallic item left behind.

She looked at the crystal butterfly hair clip he placed in her hand: It was a beautiful with sliver hues and multi-colored shards of glass across its wings.

“What’s this?”

“A gift.”

Caitlyn felt uneasy with the ornament in her palm: It felt cold and distant like it was feeling her out and wasn’t liking what it found.

“It’s attuning to you.” Finnrick explained “It’s syncing up to your whole aura.”

“Aura?” Caitlyn shot him a glare of disbelief “This isn’t one of those new age hippie things is it?”

Finnrick shook his head “It’s a magical item. Yours specifically. Everything alive has a deep and very convoluted to explain connection to this plane. The hairclip is trying to match yours so you and only you can use it.”

“It feels wrong.”

“Because it doesn’t know you yet. It will.”

Caitlyn felt unease about whatever this was. Part of her wanted to toss it as far as she could. The worst part was she felt the item probing at her, changing temperatures as if trying find a comfortable setting for both of them. Burning one moment and too cold the next. This was magic and it made her felt like she knew nothing.

But part of her felt it slowly and subtly trying to match her, focusing on her and on her place in the universe. It felt more natural each passing moment and she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t curious what mister detective over here was letting her borrow.

Caitlyn blew a strand of hair out of her face “How long does this usually take?”

“An hour.” Finnrick reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone “Oh shoot I have a meeting to get to.”

He turned to leave and suddenly Caitlyn felt alone. Awkward just standing in the street without someone to talk to.

“Wait!” She reached for him but quickly pulled back when he faced her “….any advice?”

Finnrick scratched his chin for a moment “Red tiles. Avoid them or they’ll blast you off the roof.”

“G-gotcha.” Caitlyn didn’t want to know what blast off the roof was code for “A-and the hairclip? What’s it do?”

Finnrick gave a cheeky grin and Caitlyn could feel her face flush “I guess you’ll have to find out angel. Bye for now. May we meet again soon.”

And like that, he was off. Strolling down the straight with a bounce in his step and humming a tune.

Caitlyn glanced at the ornate hairclip in her hand.

Turns out there was a lot more to this magical world than she thought.

[soyouareandrewdobson]

Andy on Asian Animation or SYAC: The Master Review 2

Let’s talk a bit about anime and Dobson’s work relation with it.

I think we can all agree, that starting from the late 90s and early 2000s on, anime and manga became extremely popular in the western world. Sure, Japanese animation was nothing completely new to us (Speed Racer, Nadia-Secret of Blue Water, Samurai Pizza Cats, Sailor Moon, Kimba and Akira e.g. come to my mind as properties already known in the west before 1995) but it really was around this time that thanks to “mainstream” stuff like Dragon Ball and Pokemon people became aware of how different Japanese animation was from western. Eventually resulting in the really good shit (like Cowboy Bebop, Black Lagoon, Kenshin and Heat Guy J) coming over and enriching nerd culture for more than just a few people who knew of it as an obscurity at that point. Now, if you know anything about Dobson, you likely know that his relationship with anime is rather… complicated to say the least. Or, to let him explain it with his own words…

Dobson essentially likes silly and wacky 90s anime. But later on he hated anime in general, because it got too popular and a bad experience with an anime club in college soured his enjoyment of it. Furthermore, he put the blame on his lackluster art style and storytelling capabilities as seen in the likes of Formera, Patty and Alex ze Pirate, on anime in general, while also claiming that Disney pulling the plug on 2D animation is the result of the “anime inspired” Treasure Planet, meaning anime in a sense deprived him of his chance at working at his dream job and “ruining” western animation.

Which to me has always been ignorant as fuck. For starters, I can understand not liking certain stories or genres, either for objective or subjective reasons. But to hate on an entire nation’s form of entertainment (not just individual shows or genres), depriving yourself of the chance of potentially watching a lot of good stuff while also being rather insulting to these other works and people enjoying them? Especially when the stuff you can supposedly “stomach” has been rather simplistic compared to other things?

 Second, blaming Japan for “poisoning” your art style? What, did the ghost of Osamu Tezuka possess you and FORCE you to put sweatdrops on your characters forehead while also going for the rather simplistic character style of Rumiko Takahashi, as well as emulating the slapstick of the likes as Slayers and Ranma ½?

 Next, if he had emulated them successfully, I say he would have actually managed to tell decent enough stories worth to read online. Not create Uncle Peggy aka “Discount Happosai” or the bland proto-Isekai known as Formera.

I mean, let’s give some context here: There have been people who successfully managed to emulate certain anime and manga aesthetics into western animation and make it work. Otherwise we wouldn’t have gotten the likes of Avatar-The last Airbender, Samurai Jack, the Animatrix, Thundercats 2011, Super Robot Monkey Hyperforce Go, Kim Possible, W.I.T.C.H, Megas XLR and Wakfu. You know, shows that are actually awesome as hell.

Heck, Dobson’s favorite animated show of the last decade, Steven Universe, is heavily inspired by anime aesthetics to the point of being embarrassing.

 But Dobson… well, he emulated anime aesthetics in his work the same way as these crimes against animation did.

Combined with his general shortcomings as a storyteller it is no wonder his initial comics did not do well.

 Lastly, and sorry for digressing here a bit, but if the Wikipedia entry on Treasure Planet is something to go by, there was no real inspiration by anime involved in making this movie.

Supposedly the idea of making an animated Treasure Planet in outer space movie was already pitched by Ron Clements WAY BACK in 1985 but only came to be after Michael Eisner greenlighted stuff in the late 90s. Design wise the movie was supposed to look 70% traditional and 30% sci-fi inspired and people took inspiration for the art style by illustrators associated with the Brandywine School of Illustration. A western style of illustration established in the 19th century, that had a big impact on the illustration styles for many 19th and early 20th century adventure novels and short stories.

What, is anime supposed to be the only form of animation allowed to have sci fi elements or steampunk in it? Fucks sake, The Lion King and Atlantis, which came out one year earlier to Treasure Planet, were likely more inspired by anime. Don’t believe me? Watch Atlantis and then a certain anime by Studio Gainax called “Nadia-Secret of Blue Water”. Or read up on the controversy surrounding the two.

The truth is, it is not entirely clear what caused Disney to shut down 2D feature film animation in the early 2000s. In fact, if anything, most people put the blame on Michael Eisner and a certain change in the publics taste in movies in general, combined with Disney trying to turn almost every movie they had into a franchise via cheap follow up movies on video and DVD.

And even if Disney did not shut down, are we really supposed to believe that a certain guy with fedora would have made it big at Disney to the point Alex ze Pirate would have been made into a feature film?

But Dobson could never quite understand this and instead of “reinventing” himself properly, he would rant about anime and its fans in one form or another…

 And on the peak of his hissy fit create this little art piece he baptized Anime Sux. Alternatively “West vs East”. Or as I like to call it, slap a jap.

Now, the pic was done in 2008 and Dobson claimed sometimes in the last decade, that he no longer holds his old opinions. Unfortunately, by that point he would also more or less use the chance to vent in his webcomic about anime (or rather its fans), which brings us finally back to SYAC.

 While Dobson never outright thematized in more detail WHY he hates anime and manga in SYAC (likely cause if his comic reasoning was even slightly like his reasoning in his blogs, people would have torn him apart like a bag of paper) he did use the format to punch down on anime fans and their preferences.

 For example, for someone who has a 4chan story going around of having been rather arrogant towards others in college for not liking Ranma ½, Dobson has THIS little college related comic to show off, where he portrays an aspiring manga artist as a delusional jackass.

Then in this strip titled manga, his manga fan is essentially portrayed as a young woman dressing up like a very stereotypical high school anime girl, who is in the wrong for even just DARING to draw her comics in the direction manga are read.

On one hand, I get Dobson’s point. She could be at risk of alienating a market of readers as she is obviously drawing for a western audience. Then again, if she doesn’t draw a traditional western comic but a manga, why shouldn’t she? I mean, as long as she enjoys it, which I assume she does as she seems genuinely just happy when stating that she likes manga, why not let her? Plus, this comic was drawn in the late 2000s. I think by then most people kinda knew how to read from right to left, so Dobson’s claim she would alienate or confuse people is kinda redundant. If anything I find a) Dobson getting angry at her just very petty (just let her have fun) and b) portraying a western manga fan as someone who would be confused by the sheer idea of reading stuff from right to left is also in itself just really dumb and insulting. What is Dobson trying to imply? That anime fans are so stuck in the way they consume certain media, they can’t act according to “western standards” again?

Then there is this strip where yet another female anime fan is essentially portrayed as the embodiment of how “ignorant” manga fans are of the idea of different art styles...

Which becomes rather laughable once Dobson describes his style as a mixture of European, American and  Japanese. Why? Because he is the one oversimplifying things, rather than the anime fan.

You see while anime and manga of all sorts do share certain aesthetics (like the black and white art style, emphasize on the eyes of characters, the way hair is drawn, recurring tropes within certain genres and so on) style wise (both in art and storytelling) there can be severe differences, depending on the artist alone. Akira Toriyama’s style differentiates significantly from the likes of Eichiro Oda, Rumiko Takahashi, Kentaro Miura, Tezuka, Kaori Yuki and so forth.

The same also goes for many western artists. Herge had a significantly different style from Uderzo and Goscinny. Don Rosa has a different style in which he drew Scrooge McDuck than Carl Barks did. Rob Liefeld and Jim Lee draw mainstream superheroes differently compared to how Jack Kirby, George Perez and others did. Heck, Ethan Van Sciver and Jim Lee were closely associated with Green Lantern in the 2000s and look how they differentiate.

 Which btw is the kind of skill level Dobson would have needed to have, to make it in the mainstream industry

So when Dobson says “I draw in a combination of American, Western and Japanese” all I can think is the following: THAT DOESN’T NARROW IT DOWN! WHAT THE HECK HAVE YOU LEARNT IN COLLEGE ABOUT COMICS? WHICH ARTISTS, WORKS AND STORYTELLERS DO YOU TRY TO EITHER EMULATE OR HAVE BEEN INSPIRED BY?

Then there is this little thing…

Where do I even begin? How about the fact that Dobson’s hand in the last panel looks like he has lost a thumb? The fact that the little boy, anime fan or not, is aware of Sae Sawanoguchi, a character from a short lived OVA and anime series from the 90s, which considering his age, I kinda doubt he would be aware off. Unlike Dobson, who got into anime in the 90s and admits in fact within the posts I loaded up earlier, that he had watched the anime in particular, known in the west as Magic User Club.

Then there is the implication by Dobson, that anime is so “corruptive” as a medium, little kids don’t even know the most basic characters in western animation because of it. I expect in a next panel, that all of sudden some 50s PSA guy comes along and lectures me that if I want this kind of thing not to happen at MY convention, I need to teach little kids more about the GOOD western animation, instead of the BAD eastern one. Then there is this rather unflattering portrayal of a shonen ai/shojou ai fangirl…

 Which makes me laugh cause honestly, even some of the worst shonen ai and shojou ai can do better in portraying a “realistic” gay relationship than Patty if you ask me.

Also, as much as I think fangirls can be extremely thirsty (I have read my fair share of extremely stupid yaoi and yuri fanfics) I think that in hindsight Dobson is really not anyone to complain about shipping obsession and sex when he himself has KorraSami, the Ladybug fandom and a certain rat pirate under his floppy belt.

As you can imagine, Dobson would get heat for those comics, considering how he himself has been greatly inspired by anime and manga for his major comics. And while I don’t have any explicit deviantart posts of him reacting to criticism in that regard, I do have this comic which addresses it directly.

 And yeah, if I were schoolgirl number 4, I would just sigh and walk away after telling Dobson that his mistakes and shortcomings are not related to having consumed anime, but rather by what sort of anime (and other stories) he had consumed and the amount of effort he had put in creating his stories instead of emulating just something more popular. Plus, if you really want people to draw more from life, how about drawing more from life yourself down the line? And no, tracing Star Wars movie frames does not count.

Finally, Dobson, considering how very little most people think of your work, I say mission accomplished: People have learnt from your mistakes and know not to be a Dobson.

And at last, there is this comic, which kinda wraps up Dobson’s “vendetta” with anime and manga fans within the pages of SYAC.

By trying to mock anime fans and make them look just as shallow as he is. I at least suppose. Honestly, the message of this comic is rather muddled. On one hand, I would say the strawman accusing Dobson hates anime just because it is popular is very simplified. After all, Dobson has made his reasons for not liking anime clear in a few more details. It’s just that the details in and on themselves in real life are still rather shallow and boil down to a lot of personal bias rather than an objective criticism of actual flaws. Which I think is worth pointing out.

But frankly, what is Dobson trying to say or point out here? That the strawman is not so different or even dumber than him, because he hates Justin Bieber for “shallow” and superficial reasons too?

Okay, this doesn’t quite work as well as Dobson wants. First, the argument Dobson’s strawman makes is in huge parts based on some verified statements Dobson made for not liking anime. Second, he just says a name and that triggers the guy to express his hatred for Bieber. We don’t know why the guy hates Bieber and you could make in fact the case, that he hates him not because he is popular, but because he has a genuine issue with the artist, his work or his behavior as a human being. Third, if you want to make yourself look like the better person Dobson, try to argue with the guy and make solid arguments why you don’t like anime. Instead you just deflect the criticism by changing the subject and then try to make yourself look like the “smarter” person in the room by mocking your critic in the most condescending manner.

Which as I think about it, sounds like your modus operandi on twitter and tumblr.

Weirdly enough, that more or less marks the “end” of Dobson tackling anime fans and the beef he has with them within the pages of SYAC. Despite how much Dobson’s negative reputation especially in early years was build around him hating on anime and belittling its fans, he didn’t really do more afterwards in the Dobson focused pages of SYAC. And mind you, those strips were also separated by other strips in-between, focused on Dobson just being at conventions.

Unfortunately for him, the strips didn’t really help in any way to diminish that negative reputation and instead just confirmed for many, that Dobson can’t handle criticism about his flawed opinion on anime. If anything, it just made people think even less of Dobson, as the strips just painted him as someone who would rather portray his critics as strawman he can be “rightfully” annoyed at, instead of fellow humans with slightly different tastes in entertainment, who are still worth listening to.

So, now that we have the anime fan related “annoyances” out of the way, what other sort of silly problems in making webcomics would Dobson cover in his strips and are “relatable” to everyone?

Lets see some of these examples in the next part.

[actonbellworks]

BTS and art-pop; a postmodern analysis of the album Love Yourself: Tear (2017)

this is an essay i wrote for a uni assignment, and i really wanted to post it here, so,,,

The closest definition of postmodern music, by Jonathan Kramer, in his 1996 essay Postmodern Concepts of Musical Time, is described in several characteristics. It is not a repudiation or a continuation of modernism, but contains aspects of both; it is, on some level, ironic, disregards the value of structural unity, and seeks to break down the distinctions between ‘highbrow’ and ‘lowbrow’ music. Postmodern music refuses to be cast into a specific mold, includes detailed references, is pluralistic and eclectic, but above all, it locates its meaning much more in the listener than it does in the actual music and performance. In his essay, Answering the Question: what is Postmodernism? Jean Francois Lyotard defines postmodernism as part of the modern, conceding to perhaps the most influential critic of Postmodernism, Jurgen Habermas, as he writes, “The postmodern would be that which, in the modern, puts forward the unpresentable in presentation itself…”. The phenomenon of the postmodern, as critics have tried to define it, exists in spite of a definition.

This leads us to another, far more important question; can we define ‘popular’ music as ‘postmodern’? Critics still hesitate to attribute the ‘postmodern’ or the ‘art-pop’ tag to mainstream popular music, because they view postmodernist music and art-pop as a genre that is inexorably linked with modernism, which implies that there has to be a predecessor for popular music to be classified as ‘postmodern’. In another definition, one that is, perhaps, far more closer to the hypothesis laid out by Kramer, is that Postmodernist music, and indeed, the postmodernist movement, developed as a reaction to modernism, and as such, incorporates the attributes of modernism as well as defies it to a certain extent.

The genre of K-pop has been popularised all over the world largely due to the influence of the seven-member band BTS (방탄소년단 in Korean), and their detailed musicality, which is perhaps showcased best in their third studio album, Love Yourself 轉 ‘Tear’, widely regarded as one of their most intricate works. True to the definition of postmodern music, the album smoothly shifts genres, sometimes in the gap of a single song, although there is a thematic, sometimes singular focus on the feelings of loss and loneliness. To centre a musical venture around the idea of love and loss is nothing new, perhaps, but ‘Tear’ refuses to play into any of the common tropes.

The term ‘postmodern’ contains an air of elitism with it, as it still refers to practices that developed as a reaction to the modernist methods of the twentieth century. It directly challenges the strict rules of modernist art, a return to pre-modernist era art techniques, and above all, it removes the boundaries between the “classical” and the “popular”. BTS has been termed as ‘popular music’ by critics, and while the label ‘popular music’ is considered restrictive, for many music critics, ‘Tear’ represents how the genre can be pushed to its limits, moving beyond the limitations set by the industry and by music critics in general.

Perhaps one of the most dynamic songs in the LP’s tracklist is the title track, “FAKE LOVE”, the music video for which begins with silence, and the track is completed by a jagged guitar riff that cuts off abruptly to a scene of the seven members, dressed in robes and masks that look eerily reminiscent of the early Greek comedic tradition, in which every character is identifiable by their masks and their choice of costumery. The teaser for the music video, interestingly, had the piece, Waltz in A-flat major, OP. 9, No. 1 by Frédéric Chopin, also termed as ‘The Farewell Waltz’ or ‘Valse de l’adieu’. Chopin’s music and BTS’ song both move in circles, without reaching a conclusion. Chopin’s waltz moves in ¾ beats, until it ends abruptly, and FAKE LOVE reiterates the same line,

Love you so bad, love you so bad

널 위해 예쁜 거짓을 빚어낸

Love it's so mad, love it's so mad

날 지워 너의 인형이 되려 해

널 위해서라면 난

슬퍼도

Which loosely translates to “love you so bad/ I create a beautiful lie for you/ love you so mad/ I try to become your doll by erasing myself.” Both pieces move around the idea of loss, with neither reaching anywhere fruitful. Chopin’s waltz ends where it had begun, in the middle of his heartbreak, and BTS end their song with the refrain of

기쁜 척 할 수가 있었어

널 위해서라면 난

아파도 강한 척 할 수가 있었어

사랑이 사랑만으로 완벽하길

내 모든 약점들은 다 숨겨지길

이뤄지지 않는 꿈속에서

피울 수 없는 꽃을 키웠어

Which again, translates to “for you, I could pretend to be happy even when sad/ for you I could pretend I was strong even when I was hurt/ Wishing that love is perfect as itself/Wishing all my weakness is hidden/In a dream that can’t come true/I raised a flower that couldn’t bloom”.

A particular characteristic of art-pop music and alternative music in general, is the recurring motif that runs through one or more songs. In ‘Tear’, the septet continue to use masks, in order to symbolise what is the loss of one’s self, in the process of another, perhaps more explicitly shown in their introductory music video to the album, ‘Singularity’, where singer Kim Taehyung (using the stage moniker V) sings about losing his voice, trapped in a lake, donning a mask that obscures half of his face, losing all his individuality. ‘Singularity’ is perhaps one of the most complicated songs to translate from Korean, as the songwriter, RM, lays down visual clues of what it feels like to wake up from a dream, only to find oneself trapped. The music video carries forward the baroque imagery, as well as the heavy classical influences in the slow progression of the track; it conjures the powerful imagery of being trapped underwater ourselves, in the lyrics

Tell me 내 목소리가 가짜라면

날 버리지 말았어야 했는지

Tell me 고통조차 가짜라면

그때 내가 무얼해야 했는지

Loosely translated, it refers to someone trapped underwater, who doesn't feel as though their voice belongs to themselves. ‘Singularity’ wonders whether or not it is worth it to sacrifice one’s individuality to mould themselves to fit in. Postmodern art talks about the truth of the artist, especially how difficult it is to maintain one’s sincerity to survive, be it in a relationship, or in the music industry, a sentiment expressed by the septet in the fifth track of the album, ‘Paradise’ (낙원 ), where rappers Suga and j-hope express their dissatisfaction with the world through an intertwined verse,

누군 이렇게 누군 저렇게 산다면서

세상은 내게 욕을 퍼붓네

세상은 욕할 자격이 없네

꿈을 꾸는 법이 무엇인지

(“saying some are living like this,some are living like that/ the world pours curses at me/ the world has no right to pour curses at me/ for it has never even taught me how to dream '')

The song ‘Paradise’ is not only about the futility of the dreams that we are forced to accept and work towards, it also serves as a reminder of the society that we continue to subject the future generations to, in the capitalistic pursuit of wealth and correlating it to happiness, we forget that perhaps, humanity is not defined by wealth. ‘Paradise’ sets a reminder that it is okay to pause the world to remind ourselves that the world does not exist in spite of us, it exists because of us.

Perhaps the strangest, most compelling song on the entire album is the final song, ‘OUTRO: TEAR’. A rap track featuring the three rappers, it has been one of the most lyrically intimidating songs. A direct continuation of the thought process in ‘singularity’, “OUTRO: TEAR’ also muses upon the threads of a broken relationship, and the precipice upon which it all began.

For music critics, the opening six bars of the outro are reminiscent of the sombre tunes in Rachmaninoff’s piano concertos, which reach a crescendo and give way to RM’s introductory verse. It is a song that has remorse at the very core of it, writing for one’s lost love, for which there is still regret. For RM and Suga, this comes with the words

어쩜 내가 너를 사랑했던 적이 아예 없는 것 같아서

(because it felt like maybe I had never loved you anyway)

심장이 찢겨져 차라리 불 태워줘

고통과 미련 그 무엇도 남지 않게끔

(“my heart breaks, please rather burn it, so that the pain and the lingering love disappears”) while RM denotes his regret with rhyming sequences that linger, and for Suga, it is in a series of archaic, perhaps even frightening metaphors to his breaking heart. Both the rappers are talking about their failed relationship, with music, their friends, and their love, how it has an everlasting effect on their lives, one that will never go away, even with acceptance of their fate.

Written at the brink of disbandment, perhaps the coda by j-hope is where the song hits the hardest. The most lyrically dense section of the song is the coda, where j-hope lays down a flurry of rhymes and rhythms, shaken at the prospect of leaving music altogether. Although the song stems from a personal story for the septet, it deals with the very real anxiety and fear an artist has, of having to separate from their art. For j-hope it is akin to a break-up, a sundering with the very people he had thought would be by his side forever, and he writes, “이별은 내겐 그 순간들뿐”(goodbye, for me is only there, just at those moments). He writes,

넌 내 시작과 끝That is all

(“You are my beginning, end, that is all”)

And to him, and to all artists, art is supreme, and the thought of parting from the art that has given them so much, would be akin to severing them from their soulmate. For many music critics, the outro is the most complex song they have heard form the septet, with some going so far as to naming it a magnum opus.

In Love Yourself 轉 ‘Tear’, BTS puts the spotlight on the human condition; something which is fallible, something which is dependant upon others. Postmodernism, and postmodernist art, especially, talks about the complex aspects of humanity, forcing people to pay attention to the world and to their own selves. It isn't the music videos with homages paid to Romantic era composers, neither is it the layered verses with the double entendres of lyrical meanings. ‘Tear’ is a postmodern work of art because it covers multiple aspects of the human condition, while also harkening back to the music that inspires artists to create; and the stories they tell in ‘Tear’ are universal.

(trans cr to @doolsetbangtan)

[pettyprocrastination]

Rip Out Our Seams and Stitch Us Together

Chapter One Word count: 1.9k Warnings: Uhhh brief talk of race, some language.  Chapter summary: You’re a seamstress in dc, with a tiny but successful shop run by your and your spunky cashier. Today you get a visitor that is far out of your usual demographic.

tag list: @captainsamwlsn @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa @readsalot73 @zeldasayer

(yes that’s a marilyn monroe pic she’s a major look for Valerie alright.)

Many believed that the eyes were the window to the soul, your father disagreed with that. He believed the truth of somebody's character was in their hands. 

“Shows a lot about them, little bee.” your father showed his own hands to you, wrinkled and scarred with tiny nics from years of work as a tailor. You were nine at the time, just last week you had completed your first sundress! You spent your afternoons after school in the shop with your father, doing whatever he asked. “-If they're a hard worker or if they don’t do anything at all. These little fellas will show you just that.” He wiggled his fingers at you before poking at your stomach, causing you to burst into a fit of giggles.

Twenty five years later and his words still ring true. When you first meet somebody, you don’t look at their clothes, or their smile, or even their eyes. You look for their character in their hands. 

So the moment the tiny bell rang at your shop door, your eyes were taken away from the pinned gown in front of you and towards the lithe fingers wrapped around the door handle. 

Manicured nails painted a deep red, fingers daintily curled, skin unscarred and void of all blemishes. Absolutely perfect. 

Who would expect any less of Maxwell Lord’s wife?

Your only other employee, Cassandra, a sweet sixteen year old girl you hired to watch the register and sweep floors, squeaked. 

“Hello,” She lifted the sunglasses from her face and set them utop her blonde curls. Her eyes zeroed in on you with an analytical gaze. In comparison to her floor length  fur coat and satin blouse, you suddenly felt flushed in your ripped trousers and patterned button up. “Are you the owner?” She put such infliction on each word you couldn’t tell if she was judging your store or the fact that you owned it.

Either way you felt like you were supposed to be offended. 

“That I am.” 

She slid her coat off, looking at your coat rack with a wrinkled nose before finally setting it on the hook. She walked around your store, taking in the little knick-knacks that lined the counter and the racks of clothing with a judgmental eye. 

Her eyes flicked to Cassandra, who still stood behind the register with her jaw dropped open. 

Mrs.Lord smiled and tapped the underside of her chin and she snapped her mouth shut. 

“You made all of these yourself?” Her voice was smooth like silk, but had a sharp edge to it. You felt as if you were waiting to embarrass yourself in front of her. She took a white sundress into her hands, feeling the fabric between her fingers. 

“Most of them.” You answered. She froze and raised a sculpted brow.

“Most?”

You shrugged your shoulders. “Some of these are thrift store finds, just altered and restyled.” Her ruby lips bent into a frown, glaring at the dress she held with disappointment. 

“That one is an original though.”

She stared at the dress for a moment, face scrunched up in thought before she regained her cool composure and tossed it to you over her shoulder, which landed on your face. “Be a dear and hold that for me, would you?”

You didn’t get a chance to answer. By the time you lifted the lace that obscure your vision, she was already looking at another dress. You followed behind her. 

Why the hell not? You thought to yourself as she handed you a satin blouse. You didn’t have any other customers at the moment, and you aren't being met with for a design consultation for another three hours. 

Besides, how often is it that Valerie fucking Lord walks into your store like a frequent customer?

She continued to walk around your store, red heels echoing throughout as she stopped at certain dresses and tops (mostly those of silk or lace) to admire them, before either adding them to the growing pile in your arms, or setting them back on the rack with a sour look. The entire time she did, you wondered what it was that drew in her to your tiny shop. 

The woman before you had been a big deal since she was born. Before she was Valerie Lord, she was Valerie Ackkerman. Her father had been a Hollywood director in the fifties who married an up and coming actress hot to the scene. The couple dominated the big screen and became a loved pair to America, that is until her mother got a baby bump, got demoted to supporting roles for the rest of her career, and her father continued to go on and  make films many to this day still consider iconic. 

You considered most of them to be a racist and misogynist, but you suppose they were simply a product of their time. 

And a shitty director. 

Valerie Ackkerman became Dr.Ackkerman, psychiatrist with multiple books surrounding a vast majority of subjects that can affect one’s mental state. Such as greed, fame, and the lack of proper paternal figures to shape your childhood.

Which made her choice in marriage all the more ironic. 

Maxwell Lord the fourth was a man as American as apple pie and the corporate greed that came as a table side. He’d taken over his father’s company at the ripe age of sixteen at his passing, having been groomed for the position since he was a child. 

Maxwell Lord was known as a ruthless tycoon, a tech mogul who will smile wide in his commercials before making a grown man cry in his boardroom. His wife was just as feared as him and seeing her before you now, you perfectly understood why. She was prettier than sin itself and just as rich. Which begged the question…

Why in God’s name was she in your shop?

“How long have you been sewing?” A floor length skirt with a slit up the leg was tossed in your arms. 

“Since I can remember.” Her fingers ghosted along the hangers before plucking a pink slip dress off the rack and holding it up against her body. “My father was a tailor. He taught me everything he knew.” She turned to the mirror on the other side of the room and looked at her reflection while smoothing out the fabric of the dress. “When he passed away I took over the shop, but I basically ran it already.”

She chuckled, shaking her head as if your father's death had tickled her so. “Sounds like somebody I know.”  Mrs. Lord turned to you, the dress pressed against her body. “Thoughts?”

Your eyes roamed over her body as you tried to form sentences, but nothing came out in fear of saying the wrong thing in front of a woman so powerful, she could burn your shop to the ground with a single call to her husband. 

Beautiful. You wanted to say. And terrifying. 

“It suits you.” 

She turned back to the mirror, her eyes focused on your reflection instead of her own. She tilted her head to the side and hummed. You felt like you were on display, being examined, picked apart and analyzed by the prettiest blue eyes you've ever seen in your life. 

“I know.”

When she walked past you to the register and you got a waft of her perfume, something sharp and citrusy, most likely belonging to a brand you wouldn’t dream of wearing. 

Cassandra rang her up in silence, nervously looking up from each item to the woman standing in front of her. Her hands trembled so bad you could see the fabric shake when she picked them up. 

You would have taken over for her, but  you were trying to ignore the burning sensation in your face at her judgmental gaze. You’d seen it all before, from women like her. Rich, white, beautiful, and privileged as all hell. You knew the way her eyes scanned your clothes, critiquing your curls, the cut of your jeans and the pattern of your button up that lay partially open against your chest. 

You wish you could say you were sick of it. But mostly? You just didn’t give a shit. 

Cassandra’s shaking hands dropped the bag into the floor before it reached Valarie’s, she looked about ready to cry before you stepped in. 

“Oh god I’m so-”

“It’s fine Cassie.” Her red lips snapped shut at your interjection and blase tone. 

You swiped the plastic bag and held it out to the woman with a neutral face.“Eighty-nine fifty.” You told her. She looked at you as if you had grown a second head. 

She must not be used to being treated like something other than royalty. 

But that look was replaced by a coy smile. She took the plastic bag full of clothes from your hands and handed you a thick wad of cash that was well over the amount she owed. Red, manicured nails trailing down your palm as she did. 

You suppressed a shudder. 

“You know-” She took the lace sundress out of her bag, thumb trailing along the seam. “-Your work is on par with some of the brands I wear.” You weren’t sure why the sight of her stroking something you made felt so damn intimate, but you felt like you needed to look away as if you were interrupting something.“-Maybe even better than them.”

Christ, you needed to get out more. 

“Well yeah.” You shrugged matter of factly and crossed your arms. “That’s because I’m driven by artist integrity. Not making some shoddy dress and slapping a fancy brand on it, in hopes that some trust fund baby will wear it to her next yacht party.”

The moment those words left your lips you realized you had said them to the wealthiest customer you ever had. 

Who laughed. 

Cassandra went pale as a sheet while you spoke, looking between you and the woman worth more than your entire store like she expected an explosion. 

Mrs. Lord smiled at you. “We’ll you're right about that. I have to agree.” Her hands ran down the side of the dress and stopped when she felt a fold in the white fabric. “Are these-”

“Pockets?” You grinned, like it was your greatest achievement. Honestly? It kind of was. “Sure are. Decently sized ones too, can fit your whole hand in and everything.” To prove your point, the heiress stuck her entire hand into the pocket and wiggled it with a laugh. 

“There’s still more room in it!” She sounded so in awe and excited, it reminded you of a child on Christmas. 

Her joy was infectious. 

“Every dress I make has pockets, it’s sort of like my signature.”

“Every dress?”

You drew an X over your heart. “Stitches guarantee.”

Mrs. Lord grinned. “You're certainly one of a kind miss...”

You told her your name, and she repeated it back. The way she said it made it sound like the brand name of a thousand dollar purse. 

“But you can call me stitches.” You said simply. “Everybody does.”

Cassandra looked at you with wide eyes, shocked that you went from accidentally insulting her to being chummy enough to share the silly nickname you got from customers. 

“Do they now?” She walked to the coat rack and slipped her jacket on. “Well tell me this, Stitches-” Mrs.Lord took the glasses off the top of her head and slid them over her eyes. “Do you do commission work?”

You blinked for a moment. “Well I do, but-”

She squealed and clapped her hands. “Oh perfect! We’ll be in touch then.”

“Wait-” You faltered, trying to run from behind the counter after her, but all you succeeded in doing was banging your hip against the corner. “Fuck! Who’s we?”

“Oh don’t you worry about that.” She opened the door and looked over her shoulder. “One more thing though, do you make suits as well?”

A/n:SHE’S HERE BABY WOOOOO. Iv’e been talking headcanons with @ithinkhesgaybutwesavedmufasa for like a week and a half now about this bad boy and im so excited to get the ball rolling! I love max and i love poly ships so HERE WE ARE Valerie lord owns my ass yall. Anyways please don’t feel shy to send me messages about these babes, asks, critiques or just come say hello! Let me know if you’d like to be added to the tag list, i hope you all have a good and safe day <3

[danwhobrowses]

MCU: 10 Ways WandaVision and Falcon & The Winter Soldier are the Same

So now we have 2 of Marvel's Phase 3.5 shows in the books, and both have been pretty great. In the 7 week wait for Loki though we'll have time to mull things over.

When watching the Falcon & Winter Soldier finale though, I started to notice that there were some patterns between it and Wandavision. While two completely different stories they did share some similar beats, so here's 10 I spotted and thus 10 to look out for when Loki comes around.

Spoilers for WandaVision and Falcon & The Winter Soldier, give it a watch before you give this a look

10 - Villains become Memes

While one can contest that Zemo acts more as an antihero in The Falcon & the Winter Soldier, he still provides an antagonistic edge in the story. However, both he and Agatha became villains that had charisma to charm the audience, and their actions brought about multiple memes. On Agatha's side there was the wink, Agatha All Along and her in the fitness outfit, while with Zemo there was the 'it captures the experience', his iconic dancing and Turkish Delight. While not a story beat on the shows, the writers must've known that fans would gravitate to these characters to give them such content to use. Also add a hat tip to John Walker who got his own memes too with him about to embed the shield into a dude's chest, and Wanda herself for her nose scrunch being used as a meme alongside Thor's 'is it though?'.

9 - The Government aren't exactly helpful

While the Government aren't entirely the enemy in the show, they don't do well to stay on our heroes' good side. In WandaVision, they enhance Wanda's grief in the fact that she can't even lay him to rest, SWORD instead deciding that her lover is government property and they are harvesting his 'organs' and vibranium skin as a resource to use for weapons. On Falcon & Winter Soldier, the US Government deliberately deceive Sam by having him hand over the shield to put in a museum, only to then take it out and give it to John Walker without even telling Sam or Bucky about it. In addition when they disavow Walker they try to reclaim the Shield - which, as the Contessa does reveal, isn't technically their property either. While Falcon & Winter Soldier delved deeper into the government's lack of help through the GDC subplot motivating the Flag Smashers, there were still similarities found with how SWORD - which is quite different to its comic version - antagonizes Wanda. In the end all this escalates because of them, and in the end neither of them get to keep the Vibranium.

8 - 'Good Person' is Bad Guy

Although there's a more supernatural threat in both stories, the characters end up having their trust betrayed by people they believed to be decent. For WandaVision it is current Director of SWORD, Director Hayward, who appears adamant in silencing Wanda after using her as a means to power up White Vision as a programmable weapon. For Falcon & the Winter Soldier, it's Sharon Carter - descendant of Steve's beau who he also made out with - the discarded agent who gave up a lot for the heroes only to not get it in return, remaining enemy of the state and becoming the Power Broker. The shows can also have this reserved for 'Agnes' and John Walker but in the end people expected them to break bad from day 1. You could make a statement for Wanda since she looks to be an antagonist for Doctor Strange 2 though.

7 - The MCU add a little history

Marvel has had a habit of changing Wanda's (and Pietro's) origin on a whim, the MCU deciding to source their powers on an Infinity Stone. Doing this however left a gap in the fact that Wanda is a Witch, which they cleaned up in WandaVision. Treading back on the Scarlet Witch being a mantle (though cutting her mother being a Scarlet Witch before her) as it is in the comics, they changed Wanda's powers from being latent and amplified by the stone rather than gifted to the stone itself. Falcon & Winter Soldier added to their history with the impactful Truth: Red, White and Black story, adding Isaiah Bradley into the MCU to further layer the conflict and tragedy Sam faces with being Captain America. Both are welcome additions to the MCU timeline, setting up for newer things to come in Phase 4 Movies.

6 - The hero wins the fight, but not the day

Winning isn't always winning, as Wanda and Sam would discover upon the finale of their respective shows. Wanda defeats Agatha and Hayward is forced to face his crimes, but she has also come to terms with the face that the Hex must go, and in turn her family with it. While the Hex has freed all its residents, Wanda knows that she's not on anyone's good side either with the people she subconsciously enslaved. Sam gets it a little better, he's recognized himself as Captain America and given a patented 'Cap-speech', but he was unable to save Karli Morgenthau from being killed, someone who he was once so close to reaching and sympathized heavily with. Although the Super Soldier threat is neutralized, the Flag Smashers' ideals will live on to further radicalize itself, and its vision will further sow conflict and division.

5 - (Mostly) Bigger Roles for old MCU Side Characters

Never one to shy past their crossovers, Wandavision and Falcon & the Winter Soldier both brought back side characters - some more obscure than others - from older films to gel into the plot. WandaVision brought back Darcy from the Thor franchise and Jimmy Woo from Ant Man & the Wasp to great comedic effect, fans already wanting a spin-off with them and possibly Monica - who may also count but technically not the same actress, the same can be said for 'Pietro' too. Falcon & the Winter Soldier stayed primarily in their lane of Captain America movies; with Batroc and Sharon both debuting in Winter Soldier and Dora Milaje's Ayo debuting in Civil War, while it was less comedic, the story was more interwoven with them since they all had ties to the main two characters.

4 - [Person] is obviously [Character]

Possibly a bit of a narrative backdrop, or maybe years of MCU has clued us in on a plot twist a mile away, but both shows also were unable to hide well that Agnes from WandaVision and Sharon from Falcon & Winter Soldier were in fact Agatha Harkness and the Power Broker. It's not to say that knowing ruined the story, it just felt more of a 'when' rather than an 'if'. The main difference though is that Sharon managed to keep her villainy secret, and remains that way, while Agatha went too far in trying to take Wanda's power rather than help her with it and has now become stuck as Agnes instead.

3 - New Blood coming on the Hero Scene

While the shows already did their job in setting up Wanda and Sam as big league heroes, they also looked a bit more in establishing new blood too. WandaVision established the potential for the twin Maximoff boys to grow into Wiccan and Speed - once Wanda finds a way to re-canonize them, Falcon & the Winter Soldier also made sure to introduce Elijah Bradley, Isaiah's grandson, which may also aid in establishing a Young Avengers team - what with Kate Bishop also soon to appear in Hawkeye. WandaVision also created the origin for Monica Rambeau, having her body altered by the Hex, which will likely be furthered in Captain Marvel 2, Falcon & the Winter Soldier also established John Walker as the US Agent to leave a potential for Thunderbolts, as well as introducing Joaquin Torres - opening the possibility to have a new Falcon. While not a bad thing to set up for the future, it is interesting that both shows had exactly 3 names that could become future heroes.

2 - 'Villain' character partly redeems themselves after a Grief-Fuelled Mistake

Make no mistake, technically speaking Wanda is still a villain in WandaVision: she enslaved an entire town and suppressed them as side characters of a tv show. But the thing is that she didn't really intend to cause pain, it was an impulse action triggered by her grief. The same can be said for John Walker in Falcon & the Winter Soldier, he was already pressured by the standards being Captain America would entail and he was feeling the stress of a string of failures, a Dora Milaje humbling and a frosty reception from Steve's two close friends, juiced up on Super Soldier serum, and then his best friend just got killed because he didn't back him up, in a rage he killed a Flag Smasher with the shield - even though they were fleeing and not the one who killed Lemar, which he would lie about to Lemar's family. Despite this though, they managed to find some form of redemption, even if it was small. Wanda released the Hex and stopped Agatha from going haywire with her chaos magic, John gave up on his revenge seeking to save a truck from falling. Even though it doesn't entirely make up for what they did, it was at least a sign that they had not completely gone off the deep end...yet.

1 - Comic-Accurate Costumes

Comic costumes are always a tough one because some of the older costumes were borderline atrocious. WandaVision at the very least managed to poke fun at it with them dressing up most of the Maximoff/Vision family in their comic-accurate costumes, Speed getting a few more nods in the finale alongside Wanda's revamped and quite on the money look. In Falcon & Winter Soldier, there was accurate costuming for John Walker's US Agent look and Sam's Captain America costume, not to mention Lemar's Battlestar outfit, Zemo's mask and Batroc's jumpsuit.

Overall, it's not a bad thing that they kept these story beats, but it may be worth trying to avoid some of these in later tv show plot points so that it doesn't appear repetitive and formulaic. These shows have been great, so let's keep that momentum going.

[crusherthedoctor]

Sonic Villains: Sweet or Shite? - Part 15: DR. EGGMAN

There are some villains I like. And there are some villains I don’t like. But why do I feel about them the way I do? That’s where this comes in.

This is a mini-series of mine, in which I go into slightly more detail about my thoughts on the villains in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise, and why I think they either work well, or fall flat (or somewhere in-between). I’ll be giving my stance on their designs, their personalities, and what they had to show for themselves in the game(s) they featured in. Keep in mind that these are just my own personal thoughts. Whether you agree or disagree, feel free to share your own thoughts and opinions! I don’t bite. :>

Anyhow, for today’s installment, it’s finally time for him. The bad doctor himself. Gather round ladies and gentleman, for the spotlight is on the arch-villain that shines above them all... Dr. Eggman.

The Gist: It's the dawn of the 90's. A little company called SEGA had an ephiphany. They wanted to make a video game juggernaut that could rival the quality and iconic appeal of the then-unmatched Super Mario Bros, and their current star, Alex Kidd, just wasn't doing it in the way that they hoped. They promptly set about starting anew, as a worldwide phenomenon wasn't going to make itself.

So a gentleman named Naoto Ohshima created a selection of design concepts for this brand new mascot. One of these concepts was President Roosevelt in his pajamas.

Seen here with his catgirl body pillow.

The response to this character was “This is good, but we think kids would prefer kicking the shit out of him”, and so he was given an antagonistic role instead. In the meantime, after juggling the rest of their ideas, they eventually settled on a rabbit hedgehog named Sonic for their main protagonist, knowing his Mickey Mouse-like aesthetic would help endear him to the audience, and the franchise as a whole would have an easier time gaining a DeviantART fanbase later on down the line.

Initially, the character of today's review was but a mere lackey among many, seemingly little more than one of numerous minions working for Sonic's originally intended main villain, the Nonspecific Goblin. He was also dressed as a bee for some reason.

Which is the least weirdest thing in this image.

At some point however, they all got together and decided that actually, the guy with the moustache was the only one worth shit, and so he was upgraded to the role of main villain himself. With a spiffy new attire of red and black, he was given the bold title of Dr. Eggman, because with a shape like that, what else are you gonna call him?

“Funny you should say that”, laughed SEGA of America, as they rebelled like an angsty teen and named him Dr. Ivo Robotnik instead. While this name does make equal sense for the character, as he is indeed a hard worker who also happens to like robots, the reason for this name's existence seems to have been mainly because they thought Eggman was too out there of a name for an egg-like man. Whatever the case, this would confuse a lot of fans for years, and remains a point of divisiveness to this day... Unless you're like me and your first game in the series was Advance 2, in which the manual clears it up right away, and you accept the idea of a character having two names and immediately carry on with your life.

He would have aimed it perfectly if it weren't for the Sonic Heroes Parrot distracting him.

And that was that, really. It didn't take long for them to come up with his characterization, which was that of a cackling fiend with an ego to end all egos. This guy was the Narcissist Alpha, more king than actual kings, no strings attached. Other villains would build statues of themselves, but only Robotnik would deface Ancient Egyptian monuments to improve them with his face. Other villains would think “Nah, refacing all four in Rushmore would look silly”, but only the Eggman, the Eggmyth, the Egglegend, would go “Well fuck you, I'm doing it anyway.” Then he'd do it anyway, and proceed to address to the entire world that he did in fact do it anyway.

It also didn't take long for them to develop his primary schtick. With the dynamic of Sonic VS Eggman, you had a classic rivalry between nature and technology. Interestingly enough however, this turned out to be executed more tactfully than your typical Amish-abiding examples in similar media. Never was technology itself regarded as a corruptive influence that you should never utilise no matter what. Rather, it was only as good or as evil as the person using it, with it just so happening that the villain loved machinery only slightly less than he loved himself, and it was countered by Sonic’s best friend being a techno wiz in his own right anyway. Anyhow, with his machinery, the doctor would make a name for himself among video game baddies by confronting his enemy as the boss of nearly every zone in each game, rather than hide away until the endgame.

And all without a driver's licence.

In his soon-to-be-30 years of activity, he has largely remained the same since his inception. Other characters have been introduced, other villains have came and went, but Eggman has remained THE villain of the franchise, and he's remained a vital part of the Sonic the Hedgehog universe... with a slight redesign along the way.

The only ad I don't want to skip.

The Design: Eggman's design may be more simplistic than the likes of Bowser and Ganondorf, and he may not look as openly threatening at first glance, but it's still a very iconic look no matter what look it is. His original appearance was devised so that kids could have an easy time drawing him, which only makes me feel worse about not being able to do it as a grown adult without it looking like a Sexy Legs Kirby.

Still, it's a classic for a reason. With his to-the-point colour scheme, contrasting heavily with Sonic's blue, and his capelet collar resembling walrus tusks, it was an instant winner and made everyone goo goo for g'joob.

The Emeralds he’s juggling are a metaphor for the divided fan community.

And when it was time to give the cast an update for Sonic's first real 3D adventure (or at least the first one that didn't get axed for being a magic eye seizure), Eggman got a respectable change of his own. He was taller, his getup was militaristic, and his body was more legitimately egg-shaped rather than basketball-shaped. He also gained a pair of goggles that he never uses, except in scenes where he puts them on and then never uses them.

“How do my chicken legs not collapse under the might of my gluttonous mass? Find out in an unrelated tie-in novel that you have to pay additional money for.”

There was also that one redesign from 2006, but...

Be it Classic or Modern, I've always loved his design. Before he even says a word or does anything, you know from his appearance that he's a bit of a clownish sort. But he also has a subtle creepy vibe going on, with the way his glasses often obscure his eyes, and how this only makes the pearly-white, unnecessarily wide grin on his face that much more empty and unsettling. This little bit of eeriness hiding among his cartoonish physique reflects the full extent of his character pretty accurately, as we’ll delve into soon enough.

If nothing else, it's more effective than him having no eyes at all.

GRRRRRRRR FUCK YOU BUNNIES THAT I CAN'T SEE

The Personality: If you've seen my villain reviews, then you'll have gathered that Sonic's rogues aren't known for having much in the way of personality. There are exceptions, but they are indeed the exceptions. More often than not though, whether it's an alien conquerer, an ancient monster, or Dan Green the Recolour, they can be summed up thusly: They're evil, they want to destroy the world, and the heroes stop them because they're evil and want to destroy the world. If they're feeling particularly daring, they might go for a second colour.

Luckily, as if to counter all these cardboard drawings, the central adversary of the franchise makes up for these voids of personality by actually having one. And what a personality it is.

The writers of SatAM looked at this and thought “No, this won't do, there's no character to work with here.”

He really is brimming with comedic charm. Every moment that he's present...

Every moment that he shows off...

Every moment that he basks in his own glory...

Every moment that he unveils a new wicked scheme...

Every moment that he puts his enemies to the test...

Every moment that he challenges the world...

Every moment that he laughs at the world...

Every moment that he lives, nay, every moment that he breathes...

Yes, the man has plenty of humor, and it's part of what makes him so enjoyable and memorable. However, if you think being a clown is all there is to him, then prepare to have your expectations subverted initial assumptions taken in a unexpected direction, because although he puts the goof in goofy, he ALSO puts the “oh...?” in “oh shit”.

For you see, Eggman is by all means the epitome of Laughably Evil, but do not, under any circumstance, take him at face value and write him off as a joke. He is anything but.

For starters, he can swing a planet.

There is a rule of thumb that I personally go by with Eggman’s characterization, one that I believe is an immediate make or break factor in regards to whether or not you understand what makes this villain work. Eggman - when you put all his secondary traits aside - is made up of two prominent halves. There’s the egocentric meme machine that bounces up and down like a kid with his N64 and laughs like Santa... and there’s the monster buried within that remains completely and utterly unrepentant for everything he’s responsible for. This is very important. Despite the character’s simplicity at his core, many writers have failed to grasp this, official writers included, and I for the life of me cannot understand why this is such a recurring problem. Eggman is funny, AND Eggman is evil. Both are equal. When you take away one or the other, you may have a funny character, or you may have an evil character, but you don’t have Eggman. Simple as.

Armchair intellectuals may argue that Eggman’s deeds aren’t that evil, since he tends to be merely callous rather than actively trying to hurt or kill people. Those people are probably the types on TV Tropes who weigh a villain’s evilness and effectiveness purely through the surface-level scale of their goals rather than what they actually do to achieve them. While it is true that Eggman tends to be more apathetic about the aftermath of his actions, that doesn’t - and shouldn’t - negate how dangerous he is. It shouldn’t negate what he’s capable of. It shouldn’t negate how far he’s willing to go. And it shouldn’t negate the consequences and casualties that can and do result from his many schemes.

Seriously, think about this for a second. If you confronted Eggman about his current plan to... I dunno, make a water park in Africa or some shit, and you informed him that there has been unexpected mass suffering as a result of this, how do you think he would truly feel about that? What do you think he would actually say to that?

Spoiler: No fucks.

If anything, that he “merely” doesn’t care either way as long as he gets what he wants is more uniquely horrific and deplorable than if he were a generic baddie who committed his evulz specifically for evulz’s own sake and nothing more. At least you’re inadvertently acknowledging that other people’s lives have value when you act one-dimensionally gleeful over ending them, but when your immediate response to the side-effect of a million potential deaths and environmental disasters is “Oh well, fuck ‘em, Eggmanland time baybeeee”, that’s a new level of cruelty.

Besides, even in the Genesis era, he was carpet bombing Angel Island...

“Good thing I have this shield. Sucks to be this forest!”

And he’s only gotten worse since then, indulging in such acts as going full suicide bomber with a missile, after his initial plot to destroy and rebuild Station Square through the means of Chaos and the Egg Carrier didn’t work out...

But don’t worry, he kept it lighthearted by making it look like a penis.

Making one of Sonic’s friends go insane with power against their will, forcing the Blue Blur to put them down personally...

It’s ironic, cause he’s metal. Or do I have to awkwardly explain the joke two more times before I’m a proper YouTuber?

Capturing thousands of innocent aliens, and forcefully converting them into mindless beasts...

I’m pretty sure I saw Alfred Molina conduct this experiment one time.

He even removed the heroes’ collective IQs so that he could shoehorn a cliffhanger on an already terrible game.

Thanks, cunt.

And honestly? When it comes to Sonic and chums at least, Eggman does let out a more openly sadistic side now and then. Need I mention that time when the doctor forced Sonic and two random buddies to make their way through a trap-infested island of his own creation? Not for the sake of nabbing Chaos Emeralds or anything of the sort mind you, he just wanted the blue motor mouth to suffer.

Images you can hear.

To make matters even worse, as befitting of his manchild tendencies, he’s ridiculously petty. How petty? Petty enough to abduct a little girl’s mother for no other reason than because Cheese completely trivialized his forces the girl was friends with Sonic and helped participate in the latest kicking of his own ass.

He only picked Vanilla because there was no Strawberry.

But at least his captives can admire the sheer variety that their captor has to offer. One of the greatest things about the doctor's style is that anything goes. With all due respect to Bowser, he tends to stick with his fiery castles (although he has been branching out recently), and plenty of other villains in gaming tend to be similarly stuck in their ways when it comes to tastes. Eggman, on the other hand, will create all sorts of fortresses and reside anywhere on the planet and beyond. It can be in the sky, in space, somewhere hot, somewhere cold, under the sea, in a circus... and every now and then, he might combine some of them together and thensome. So long as it's even vaguely mechanical in some way, his ground rules have already been ticked off.

Hang on a minute...

You know what else Eggman is? Relentless.

Persistence is a quality that most villains by their very nature share, lest they cease to be an effective antagonist. But once again, Rrrrrrrobotnik maxes out more than any other, and will often go to insane lengths to keep the current plan going, or if not that, then to spite Sonic.

Exhibit A: Sonic 3 & Knuckles, in which the grand finale consists of the madman throwing a gravity-shifting contraption your way, busting out a Kaiju-sized robo, escaping with the Master Emerald after his defeat, continuing to escape even after the Death Egg has been thoroughly destroyed, getting chased through the asteroid fields in space by Super Sonic, and only finally going down when the escape craft and the piloted mech controlling the escape craft are down. And all of this came after a grand adventure where, among other things, he destroyed an entire level just to kill you.

There are immortal omnipotents that put up less of a challenge.

“Looks like it’s time for Plan... *checks paper*... F.”

His relentlessness also reveals another side of the doctor that is simultaneously admirable and terrifying: He bows to no one. No one. Doesn’t matter who it is. Doesn’t matter how powerful they are. Doesn’t matter how much the odds are stacked against him. If another villain were to demand that he cower before them, the scientist would laugh and show through physical demonstration that this is not the way the egg rolls. Unless he’s absolutely unable to do so, he will give it his all every time, and even if he can’t, he’ll use his crafty mind to find some other way to get around the issue. You can beat him in battle, you can foil his plans, but you absolutely cannot break his resolve.

“Dad said it’s my turn to play with the Ruby. I know this, because I’m your dad.”

What about his relationship with those who actually serve him? Specifically, his own robots? Well for the most part, he treats them like absolute crap, what with verbally abusing them at every corner and being all too willing to go full Vader on them the moment they mess up. He IS capable of expressing fondness and giving praise to his more successful creations, like with Metal Sonic and Gamma, but even then, it’s a roundabout way of praising himself, since he’s the one who made them what they are. So basically, you’re only valuable to him if you make him look good.

Gaming in the Clinton Years in a nutshell.

And as for Sonic? Yeah, like with any legendary and long-lasting hero/villain dynamic, it’s obvious that Eggman has some degree of begrudging respect for his opponent. But if you think this respect would dissuade him from actually going through with his ambitions of rulership...

As the hedgehog’s apparent demise in Sonic Adventure 2 proves, as well as his defeat at the hands of Infinite and the subsequent six months of brutal conquest in Sonic Forces, Eggman is dead serious about his goals. If you think he’d get bored after conquering the world, he would simply expand his resources and have a crack at conquering the rest of the universe. When he says he hates that hedgehog, I’m inclined to believe that he means it, and although he may enjoy his “games” with Sonic to an extent, I also can’t see him wanting to remain stuck on square one forever.

If this were Sonic X, he’d just grieve.

By the way, the scene above? Undeniable proof that for all the doctor’s boasting, he’s not actually lying or exaggerating when he prides himself on his brilliance. Because when you get past his goofy exterior, when you look beyond the occasional, relatively minor mistake (*glares at IDW*), you’ll see that... yes. He IS brilliant. And not just in the science department either, although his countless robots and strongholds over the years are no doubt a testament to his credentials there. While he may prefer to go in big and bold, he can also be shrewd with his strategies when he wants to be.

Sonic’s aforementioned near-death experience, for example, was the result of Eggman turning the heroes’ own cunning plan on its head by being one step ahead of them. And in Sonic Unleashed, he lured his enemy into a trap, culminating with him cancelling out Super Sonic.

“...and pay the price for your Werehog gameplay...”

And after all those years of struggling, he finally got a giant monster under his complete control. “But he had help!”, you say? Yeah, from himself.

Did Flynn sleep through all this...?

Much like his inner nature as an evil bastard, Eggman's effectiveness is likewise commonly underestimated by writers. Yes, he occasionally makes mistakes. Yes, he occasionally overlooks details. Yes, he occasionally lacks foresight. But he is NOT stupid. A hero is only as good as their villain after all, and if Eggman is portrayed as a bumbling fool, then how can Sonic be a truly great hero? Eggman is humorous, sinister, and when the chips are down, competent.

...Did I mention that he's also a master Olympian?

The Execution: There's no surprises here. You knew from the moment you saw this review that my stance wasn't going to be anything less than 100% fanboy adoration. In that respect, this section almost feels redundant, because there's only so many ways I can say “Dr. Eggman is the fucking shit and I'm eternally grateful to Mr. Ohshima for bringing this absolute masterpiece into our world” without it getting repetitive. So to cap this review off, I'm going to very briefly compare his portrayals in other media, and explain why they tend to not be as good as the original SEGA Eggman.

“Cause they’re not balanced, right?” you ask. “Cause they veer too far in a particular direction? You're so predictable,” you add. To that I say:

1. Yeah, basically.

2. ...S-Shut up...

3. While the conclusion may be obvious, it's nonetheless important because as I mentioned previously, despite how straightforward this villain is, writers seem absolutely intent on not getting the point. There are loads of villains out there who share Eggman's talent of mixing hilarity and evil together with a bow of competence on top. Two of those villains are among the most famous supervillains of all time, in fact. You might have heard of them.

Joker can do it just fine. Green Goblin can do it just fine. And plenty of others can do it just fine. So why is it such an issue with Eggman? What is it about a round body and a long moustache that gets people to think “No, this guy is absolutely incapable of being comedic and threatening at the same time, no question, end of.” Is it because he’s a more cartoony franchise? Well, that can't be the case, because even Mario has a couple of beloved examples. Fawful, anyone? How about Dimentio? Cackletta? King Boo? K. Rool? Hell, you could even count Bowser himself depending on the portrayal.

Anyway, the point is, writers tend to miss the mark for one reason or another. With Sonic X for example, he wasn't too bad in the beginning, but as the show went on, he became exactly the toothless non-villain that many people misjudge him as. We all know that scene where he berates Black Narcissus for harming their captives (not for pragmatic reasons mind you, he genuinely took issue with the act on moral grounds, even though his own hands weren’t exactly clean either), but even before that point, he was doing such things as healing an injured Sonic without an ulterior motive, not taking any opportunity whatsoever to start conquering Sonic's world because he was pining for Sonic's attention, and being the Jiminy Cricket to Chris Thorndyke's Pinocchio. Why they thought the goddamn villain should be the moral conscience of this show remains an unanswered question, but at least it no longer influences how he's portrayed in the games.

Then you have the IDW comic, which is a similar tale of starting off decent and then careening wildly into the abyss, but for different reasons. Initially, he was built up to be in-line with his competent, foresight-packed self from Forces, with his inevitable return being met with dread, and a delightfully devilish scheme to match when he finally did so. But somewhere along the way, Ian Flynn thought that Eggman coming back from his amnesiac period and returning stronger than ever with a new minion and a deadly virus wasn't enough to up the stakes... so they decided to “up the stakes” by turning both the doctor and his new minion into massive imbeciles so as to justify their plot getting hijacked by the Deadly Six, a move so predictable yet infuriating that it got even me to turn against the Six. And the reason the Six got invited in-universe is because Starline decided he didn’t like being unique and devolved into Snively 2.0 behind Eggman’s back. All this from the alleged “best writer” for the series...

Yeah, same.

And then you have the Boom version, which shares basically the same issues as Sonic X but in a more mundane fashion. It's easier to dismiss because it's a comedy-centric show and his redesign makes it easier to separate him from mainline Eggman, and I'll gladly admit that he does have a lot of genuinely funny lines that redeem him a little bit. But yeah, too much of not being a true villain for my tastes.

Now this isn't to say that there haven't been portrayals in other media that are up there with the original. The versions that I consider better off than the ones above include...

- The OVA Eggman is pretty faithful all things considered, aside from his romantic feelings for Sara, which feels slightly off since the idea of Eggman loving anyone other than himself is incredibly unrealistic at best. But it doesn't actually soften or undermine his deviousness, so I'm willing to let it slide for an alternate take. Especially since he gave us the best Metal Sonic out there.

- AoStH is far from a perfect show, but there's a reason why even its detractors tend to treat its version of Robotnik like a national treasure. Admittedly most of that is because of the legendary Long John Baldry and the endless memes associated with this incarnation, but despite hailing from a comedy-focused show like Boom Eggman, this Robotnik still had a lot of legitimately dangerous moments, more than you'd think.

- And of course, Jim Carrey's Robotnik in the Sonic movie is just... *chef's kiss*

So obvious aesop though it may be, but you see what the more effective portrayals have in common, I assume?

Granted, this also isn't to say that SEGA Eggman himself has had a perfect track record. The decade's worth of upstagings and backstabbings by other villains should be enough of a counterpoint to that claim, and I've also made it clear now and then that I take issue with certain games regarding what they do with the doc, no matter how revered they may be by other fans. Sonic Adventure 2, for instance. I praised the fake emerald scene, and I do sincerely believe that he has a number of other badass moments in that game, but because Shadow was playing him like a fool the whole time, I can't help but have a bitter taste in my mouth when I look at the bigger picture.

So close to greatness, yet so far...

So in that case, which game do I think has Eggman's best showing overall? That's not in any way an easy question, but lack of dialogue aside, I'm gonna go with Sonic 3 & Knuckles again, as the classic journey through the sights of Angel Island plays out in a way that highlights just how determined, ruthless, and underhanded he is with carrying out his mission to revive the Death Egg by any means necessary. Other games do win out in other areas - SA1 for how bastardly he is, Forces for how cunning he is, Colours for his hilarious announcements, CD for using the scenery to show the effects of his actions, Mania for not letting the other villain walk all over him - but for the purest essence of the doctor at his cartoony yet competent best, I'd say S3&K is a reasonable bet.

And when it comes to all his many traits, which one do I find the most special one of all? Well again, far from easy to answer, but I think the coolest aspect about him is also one of the most overlooked. Robotnik, despite whatever superhuman qualities he may occasionally unveil, is for all intents and purposes a regular guy with a big brain. This might make him appear unimpressive when compared to your average Final Fantasy villain and the like, but if anything, it paints him in a more flattering light than expected, because he doesn't even need to be on their level to still be on the radar. It's easy to be a big bad threat when you're an ancient demon or an almighty god-like being, and you only have to wave a hand to cause armageddon. But when you're just Some Guy™ going up against superpowered opponents, meaning you have to earn your threat level the hard way, and you prove to be a challenge every step of the way regardless, because you're just THAT much of a genius... that's fucking awesome, no other way to put it.

And you know what else is awesome? You may not like Eggman, and you don’t have to like him, but like it or not, he is directly and indirectly responsible for a vast majority of the coolest and most loved moments and aspects of this franchise.

The opening to Unleashed? Eggman set up the scene.

Shadow running around and continuing to be part of the franchise? Eggman released him.

Blaze getting involved with Sonic’s world and continuing to be part of the franchise? Eggman’s half-responsible for that.

Metal Sonic? Eggman made him.

Egg Dragoon? Eggman.

Big Arm? Eggman.

Monkey Dude? Eggman.

That text is missing a blue checkmark.

This review is probably longer than the echidna family tree in Archie at this point, so I better finish it off. If it wasn't obvious from all the paragraphs I've belted out in this post, I'm very passionate about Eggman and the way he’s portrayed. Ever since I got into the Sonic franchise in 2003, I immediately took a liking to the doctor, and to this day, he remains not only my favourite Sonic villain, my favourite Sonic character, but also my favourite character period. Some may find it a weird or lame choice compared to other, “better” characters, but that's the way it is, and I ain't about to change it. I am very unlikely to ever stop enjoying the hell out of this villain, and even if he got irreversibly ruined in some way, I'd still continue to love what he was before that point.

Because yeah, he's not the deepest character ever, but... who cares? Is it not enough that we find something that appeals to us? When I got into Sonic, I was introduced to fantastic games, a likable cast, high quality soundtracks, beautiful worlds, numerous friends on this very site, and of course, the lovely treasure that is my partner. I may not have been with this franchise during the 90's, but it's given me just as much fun, nostalgia, and happiness as those who were. Despite the flawed titles, despite the fandom conundrums, I still love this series.

And I still love this absolute prick.

Crusher Gives Dr. Eggman a: TWO Thumbs Up!

[viktor-noctis]

Servitude (One-Shot)

I have. No. Excuses.

So, I was watching The Three Musketeers (1973), where Sir Lee plays the sexiest Rochefort to ever grace the screen, and got to enjoy his tender relationship with the Lady de Winter (you see like only a few instances of it, but I enjoy it immensely).

Then, of course, I watched The Four Musketeers (1974) in which their relationship has quite a bit more screen time, and Lee even has a kiss! I love it!

Of course, after this I had to watch The Return of the Musketeers (1989) where it's revealed Rochefort and the Lady de Winter had a bastard daughter named Justine. Now, obviously, she wants revenge on the men who killed her mother, but her overall character was just... quite interesting. Not only that, her getting revenge on the main four musketeers wouldn't feel complete without a bit of eerie, weird revenge on her father, whom she also seems to blame for the death of her mother, which inspired this one-shot...

Warning for... uhm... incest. Nothing explicit (for now), but there's implication.

He should have known when he made the offer. She possessed too much of her mother, too much of the same ruthless cruelty that had seen nobility fall, men more powerful, and far more wealthy than himself. Perhaps it was that, just that, the fact that she could have any and every man that had allowed him to convince himself that she cared for him at all. He, the Comte de Rochefort, the one she returned to, the one she asked for, the one she made room in her bed for, whenever she entertained the Parisian court with her majesty. A woman that could level empires, yes... it made sense, why the Cardinal had always regarded her as a threat, a sharp-fanged serpent he allowed to dine at his table, waiting for the opportune moment to orchestrate her downfall. If only he had been faster, had made himself wiser, he might have avoided their combined plummet. Vengeful, beastly woman... It was her own greed for vindication that had done her in, the crushing spite that not even he was capable of assuaging without the blood of those she coveted. There was only one way she could be satiated, his darling, winter moon, bright and golden as the sun in mid-summer. He, along with half the fools in Europe, burned for her, but it was her own splendor that put everything to the torch, and found him submerged in the tortures of the Bastille. "Father," her voice - that voice - entreated him from the half closed door behind him. Rochefort's jaw clenched, nostrils flaring as he inhaled, his brow set and hung as he glared at the far wall. She had already made her demands known, her great plans... she would kill the King in the morning, with her own hands. He swallowed as he turned, forcing the drink, acrid and burning, to slide down the tight, hot expanse of his throat. "What is -" His hand gripped the door handle, pushing against the oak with his other, only to find himself confronted with the pale, naked back of - "Come, help me with this." Her golden hair was swept away, revealing the ivory expense of her shoulders, down, the smooth lines of her shoulder blades, the subtle curves of her vertebrae. The curls he had held, tangled between his calloused knuckles, coiled on the tips of his fingers, were twisted over one shoulder, a ribbon clinging to a few of the strands. Her dress was half peeled off of her, azure petals to compliment her razor blue orbs, narrowed upon him, still standing in the door. "Well?" Justine's voice splintered the illusion, making his heels hiss over the stone beneath them. Rochefort tore his gaze away, his interest growing keen and enraptured by a rather hideous painting on the far wall, obviously made by some simpleton with a brush. "Justine, forgive me, I thought I heard you call and -" He never bumbled like this. Not in front of the Cardinal, long since deposed, or her mother, not even with a grave to mark her... "And so I did." Rochefort's eye widened, ripped from the travesty of oil and pigment on the wall, back to the cut and curve of that face. Yes, they were so alike, in more ways than one, but he had long ago learned to distinguish the bow of the lips, the rise of a cheek and brow, the tip of the nose... But those differences, at once so apparent to his eye, had been obscured in the firelight, the shadows, and the moon. "Why?" He couldn't restrain his rasp, the touch of shock no doubt present in his risen brows, the slope of his mouth, and the slack of his jaw. "To help me dress, of course." She raised a blonde brow at him, lips pinching into a line, though there was no disguising the fullness that awaited within them. "Surely you're capable of that?" Rochefort's teeth clicked, resounding in his ears. His hand felt... hot, knuckles turned to ice around the handle, which dug, unforgiving and harsh into the crests of his palm. "Do you really believe that proper?" The position of a lover, of a husband, not the aging father he had become. He was no handsome rogue anymore, no devilish creature, and though his sinew had not wavered, his hair had faded into steel and sulfur. And there was always the

matter of -

Cyclops. He swallowed, lingering still by the door, held askew only by his lean frame. No, even if those weren't reason enough, the fact it was his daughter kept him bound to the spot. "And since when have you known me to care for what was proper?" His gaze, having slowly fallen to the floor, snapped to hers... that damned sky, bright and dazzling, promising not a shred of rain. But it was that same blue, that same endless expanse that would swallow a man's conscience, make him feel as if he were falling, slamming through the clouds into the maw of the ethereal blackness. "Or you, yourself cared?" That cutting smile should have been his retreat, the glint of pearls to match those around her neck, shining instead, within her full, rose colored mouth. He should chastise her, for once in her twenty years upon the earth, behaving like a whore in front of her own father, but they both knew he had no right, especially when she, like her mother, would only laugh in his face. He should retort, give into that temptation to tease, if only to remember, for she had placed the agony of sentiment upon him, what it was like to hold her attention, that bright, glorious, scorching woman's affection. He should flee, find refuge within a bottle of port or scotch or even English whiskey, to drown out the sight and sound of her, damned to wonder if she smelled and tasted the same as the hellcat that had birthed her from his own loins. Under her gaze, the weight of her expectation, he came forward, swallowing down the lingering burn of the wine on the back of his tongue. Rochefort watched his hands rise. He knew they were his. That knot of scar above his right knuckle, the puncture in the left palm, the slash of white across the back to his wrist, a series of memories lacerated into his skin of battle and victory and defeat. She had tended a few of them, washed and bandaged them, seen and kissed many others. Sometimes, he convinced himself he had forgotten which was which, but - Such lies never lasted long. "Come now, father, I don't have all night." Whispered, breathy, a mixture of exasperation and... anticipation. Rochefort's fingers twitched, reaching forward just to hear her giggle - "Come now, darling, what are you waiting for?" A playful question, the quick dart of her tongue over her teeth, as if to lessen the sting of her bite. "I'm afraid I simply prefer to do the reverse." His reply was easy, even as his fingers pulled with a gentleness that seemed foreign, encasing her body in silk and satin. "This part is far too tedious." Rochefort noted that the strings were lighter, yet didn't fray, a hidden strength to conceal a dignity that she was said to have lost. The proof lay there, disguised under a sleeve or slip of black cloth, the mark of a traitor in one regard or another. "And far less enjoyable. "Is this chore too boring for you, father?" Rochefort's hands paused, knuckles twined with the fabric, grazing the intricate fold of white lace and blue silk. He inhaled, the realization that he had denied himself breath until that point found in the color that speckled his vision, the scent of jasmine invading his lungs, slamming into the chambers of his heart. His chest tightened, expelling that scent, that damned flower back into the evening air with a low rasp. "You said you would come as my servant." Her voice was still too low, too patient for the vixen she had exposed him to back in Paris. "Did you think I would not make use of your services, father?" Rochefort could see the fingers twitching, the palms wavering, the whole of his hands shaking against her gown. He dare not reach out, breach the remaining gap of inches, the tension of the indecency already so close to breaking. "What would they think, if I did not make you earn your keep?"

Have I not done that already? He had given her what she wanted: the names of the men who judged her mother, finding her guilty, and by extension himself. But his own plight, the brush with death, the fall from grace, his imprisonment and now virtual banishment, meant nothing to her. No, he had to accompany her, act as her accomplice in the killing of four men he wanted nothing more than to be as far from as physically possible. And now, now this. What did she gain from it all? What satisfaction was it all worth? Rochefort remained silent, the shift and hiss of her dress as she turned away from him filling the gloom. He pulled to close the space, hiding the smooth arch of her lower back, all the way up to her shoulders, taking the laces in his still quivering palms. Over, under, drawing them taut till they knotted, the twin loops forming a charming bow at the base of her spine. He stepped back, refusing to open his mouth, and she turned to observe his handiwork. "Marvelous work, father." Still that gentle, tormenting tone, the underlying promise of a woman. "I should like you to help me dress from now on." She stepped around him, pausing only when she reached the door. "And tonight as well, when I change..."

×××

For those of you who are wondering, it was quite common in ye-old days, for men - husbands - to help their wives by knotting their dresses (this is also how some adulterers were discovered) or helping them undress, hence Rochefort's apprehension about the situation. Not to mention, knowing her parents were lovers, this is obviously intruding upon the intimacy they must have shared.

There's a lot of psychological stuff to this, some very twisted mind game madness, but yeah... this was an exercise, one I enjoyed. You can actually watch The Return of the Musketeers of YouTube right now (one of those lovely, random fan uploads). It's not as good as the first two (Rochefort doesn't have a single sword fight and they turned him into something of a coward), but still quite enjoyable.

[ravenwolfie97]

2020 Art Summary

Yep, it’s 2021 already. 2020 is finally over. It felt like it lasted forever, and it felt like the end would never come, but here we are. Crazy how the time flew by.

I felt like I didn’t get much art done this year because of Current World Event, but I made a lot more than I thought I did. Even some of my new favorite pieces came out of this year, so I think that’s worth celebrating and looking back upon!

I was insanely productive during the first month of 2020, and looking back I was surprised at all the stuff I did, but then I remembered that that winter season was actually one of the best times of my life! I started being more socially involved, and I think my newfound drive at the time translated into all the art I pumped out this month. This is just a small fraction of what I made in January, but I only have so much space. Quite a few complex pieces in both style exploration and polishing my own style.

Apparently February was a rather intimate month. Things began to slow down in terms of my own art here, with me spending more time in social settings and school work ramping up, I didn’t have as much time to coop up in my room to draw. I did wanna do something for a friend’s Valentine’s Day OC art challenge, so I drew my lovey-dovey couple from Dance of 1000 Words havin’ a dance. Nothing actually came of that challenge, but it was fun to do regardless.

One of the things I was most proud of in the winter season was making more friends, and one of the closest friends I made was completely coincidental. I met a person named Kiri on the bus one night I decided to volunteer somewhere by myself, and we ended up chatting and getting along. They quickly told me their tumblr username, and I shot them a message immediately after they left. A couple days later, we met up for brunch, and we started becoming really close friends and creative partners!

Not much else happened in March cuz that’s when Current World Event started becoming an issue, but Kiri and I still kept in close touch and we randomly started developing a concept for a Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Galar Edition. These are a handful of characters we thought up, with Skipper the Scorbunny and Dross the Dreepy as the main characters, Morgrem as the main antagonist, and some shopkeepers such as those of the Greedent Bank and the Indeedee General Store. This was also my first time drawing all of these Galar Pokemon (except Scorbunny, but I also made Skipper a bit more unique than a regular Scorbunny).

Lots of events happened this month. First of all, Steven Universe Future ended, one of my favorite and most influential shows was no longer continuing. I had to do something as tribute, both as a send-off to one of the greatest cartoons in the world and as a cathartic release for my feelings towards it.

A while later, I got the opportunity to start playing an MMO in beta called Fer.al, by the same people who made Animal Jam, which coincidentally I had also beta tested for back in the day. I ended up getting really attached to my first character, a Senri I named Sasha, and though I’ve made more characters than them since, they’re still my absolute favorite. Though I haven’t touched the game in a few months, I was really engrossed for a long time and enjoyed playing through the beta and early access phases.

At the end of the month, some friends of mine invited to a roleplay group with some mutuals, and we all played characters in a crime syndicate. Just a bunch of ragtag thieves and criminals who ended up together in order to protect an artifact called the Crown of Thieves, which was essentially a flag to be taken by other groups to prove that they are the best thieves in the land. My character was based heavily on my sona (if it wasn’t obvious) and was also influenced by Cloud Strife, since the FFVII Remake had just come out and I was super into watching the cutscenes at the time. My character’s (code)name is Valkyrie, and they are a mercenary, going between multiple different employers to carry out whatever duties they need to do. They have a more complicated backstory, but presently they were recently hired by recommendation of their friend Shark (played by @shmoots-universe​ who is also My friend now ily maya) who works with a group called the Court Cards who are currently in possession of the Crown of Thieves. Valk never really had a place to call home, but staying with this group of people had to be the closest they could get to that feeling. They still sleep with a knife under their pillow because of trust issue but that’s okay.

Okay, so technically these examples started in April, but I continued making content with them in May, and the month was just pretty void of art in general, so here I am addressing them.

There were two main things I worked on this month: a Steven Universe AU of my own and the whole #sixfanarts thing that kicked off around then. Let’s start with the fanart bits. I did two and a half of them (six in April and nine in May), and it was so much fun to be able to draw stuff I don’t normally do! My personal favorites are shown here: Blake Belladonna from RWBY, Roll from Megaman, Yuki Konno from Sword Art Online, and Link from The Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess. The other thing I’d been planning for a while was a Steven Universe AU, probably to cope with the show being over but also because I was inspired by a lot of those SU AU artists I started following at the time. I won’t share the details here because it’s gonna have its own blog at some point, but the example I’ve shown here is of a comic I made loosely in order to introduce a divergence in the plot of the story as well as introduce a character unique to my AU. It was a lot of fun figuring out how to draw the characters and get a feel for the style.

As the year progressed, my amount of art I made per month began to dwindle, this time mostly because school was kicking my ass especially hard with finals. However, I took what time I had to get some backburner pieces finished, like the Tigerlily picture which I sketched out a couple months back, and the Gunvolt picture which I started working on SIX YEARS AGO. I don’t quite know why I got the urge to work on it again after so long, but it was nice to finally realize. The other drawing for DOTS was done in the dead of night but I was really happy with how it came out.

Despite only having two summer classes left of school, this month was really rough because they demanded a lot of my time and attention. I did not have the gumption to do anything digital, so I stuck to my sketchbook to get out what I felt like getting out.

My friends and I did a stream of the game Helltaker, and I really enjoyed the concept, so in following my friends I made my own Helltaker demon OC named Raksha the Ravenous Demon (it’s a pun but also got mythical insp). I also got super into Hazbin Hotel at this point, mostly because the Addict music video dropped and I couldn’t get enough of it, so I doodled Angel Dust cuz I felt like it. The other drawing I did was actually a free commission I gave a friend of mine as a prize for a trivia game show I ran back in June. He along with a couple other friends got some free drawings from me for getting the top three scores, and this one in particular was fun because of how interesting it was. He wanted me to draw a video game reviewer called the Irate Gamer from a specific moment, and I decided to go ham and just make it as dramatic as possible.

University classes finally wrapped up and right after that I was in the process of moving out of my apartment and getting adjusted to living with my parents again. I did a couple of agg.io drawing sessions with my friends from the Court Cards group as well as a new Dungeons and Dragons homebrew group I had joined. I drew some more of Valkyrie and came up with a design for my DND character Qakuqtuq (or Kai for short). He is monkey grandpa and I love him.

My main focus was on finishing a polished piece for my friend Cake, whose birthday was in the upcoming month. I wanted it to be as amazing as possible, so I put a lot of time into getting more detailed and making them look good. In addition to that, I did a few TOME doodles just for fun. The creature on the bottom was for this month’s art challenge on my Discord server where we made original TOMERPG monsters, and I created Hundylow, a Crystal-element monster based on the Grindylow from English folklore.

This month was a lot more productive than the past few had been. I tried to do a 31-day art challenge called Creatober but failed to get past the third prompt because I was still swamped with other work. I’m still happy with what little I did, including the piece with my characters Kyle and Guarudan from DSWD.

I don’t remember how, but I also suddenly rediscovered an old Flipnote Hatena series called Tales of LostClan, a Warriors fan series that I would say was the most obscure thing I’ve ever been super invested in. It was what got me into the actual Warriors books, and I liked it so much I redrew the animations into a comic... twice. Didn’t get nearly as far the second time but clearly my love for this little fanfiction had not waned after nearly a decade. I felt like drawing a book cover/movie poster for the series, just to get it out there and see how much I’ve improved over all that time.

Also I felt like making a vampiresona just before Halloween because I never dress up for Halloween in art (or real life anymore, for that matter), and I wanted to do something like that for once. It was short-lived but I really liked the design!

The focus of this month was definitely on Pokemon stuff. As per usual I contributed to the current Gotta Draw ‘Em All collab, and I was tasked to draw Regieleki. It was really fun to figure out how to make it stand out and look like it was made of electricity.

I also committed a lot of my spare time to my Fakemon Gym Leaders, as I had been working on bringing them to life in the past year or so now. As of this post, I’ve finished rendering their full body poses and gym badges, but I’m still working on completing all eight VS portraits, the first half of which are shown here.

I... didn’t draw anything this month, actually. What I’m showing here was worked on in the last few days but has actually been in progress for a couple of months, and I just finished it earlier today, in 2021. But I needed to show something off, and it’s also about time I mentioned it.

Back in October, I kept seeing people rave about this game called Genshin Impact, and I was interested but not so much as to start playing it... until my friends started playing and I was like “fuck it, let’s download it”. Since that day, I have been super immersed and in love with this game, to the point I came up with my own canon based on my gameplay experiences. This also included the creation of an original player character: Astra, the non-binary Traveller. And now, I’ve finally drawn them and brought them to life.

It has been one hell of a year. I had some of the highest highs and lowest lows in 2020, lots of changes, and I have now officially moved onto the next chapter of my life now that my time at university is finally over. I’m very excited for what 2021 has to offer, and I’m going to go forward with great ambition.

[dramioneasks]

Can you pretty please recommend some of your personal favorite dark!fics (like anything with either non/dub possessive!Draco ect?)

Here are some of mine (Warning: Some of these stories contain graphic depictions of rape):

Her Shoes by margaritama - NC-17, 19 Chapters - Draco Malfoy has demanded Hermione Granger head up an important new Wizard and Muggle venture he’s funding. They’ll be working at his home. Why would he do this? It’s clear he can’t stand her. Isn’t it?

Out of the Silent Planet by ianthe_waiting - NC-17, 39 chapters - Hermione Granger fulfills Severus Snape’s final wish, to journey to Japan to ‘retrieve’ something of importance.

A Slow Cruel Descent by SenLinYu - M, 2 Chapters - The war grinds on and Hermione Granger, the lead intelligence for the Order of the Pheonix, is captured. Unable to crack her through interrogation without risking her mind, Voldemort conceives a cruel method of breaking her that involves a reluctant Draco Malfoy.

The Unbreakable Bond by MrBenzedrine - M, one-shot - One Shot. STRONG THEMES. Very Point? What Point? Hermione forms an unbreakable bond with Draco- Smut to follow! ANGST 3Plus,Abuse,Anal,Angst,BDSM,Bond,COMPLETE,Contro,D/s,Dom,F/F,Fingering,H/C,HJ,Humil,M/s,Oneshot,Oral,Other VERY DARK.

Crumple by MissiAmphetamine - M, 11 chapters - As the war rages on two years post-‘final battle’, Hermione is captured by the other side and Malfoy is the only hope she has of surviving. [“Granger?” His voice is urgent, but she just sits there and breathes for a moment, feeling violated and still radiating pain, her eyes staring blindly at the cell wall opposite her, her brain frozen in what she thinks dully might be shock.]

Pieces by Kyra4 - M, 5 Chapters - Can the same person who broke you into pieces, be the person to put you back together again?

Voices by Kyonomiko - M, 3 Chapters - Hermione has long accepted she might not make it through the war alive, but after years on the battlefield, she never expected to be at the mercy of Draco Malfoy. Not untouched by his own experiences, his manic behavior leaves her living in constant fear of the unknown, suffering both affections and afflictions at his hands.

Stone Dragons by gravidy - R, 3 Chapters - Sometimes there are no right decisions. There are only actions and consequences. Hermione’s only choice now is who to betray.

And So No One Else Can Have You by flipflop_diva - E, one-shot - Hermione may be Draco’s slave, but she is not quite as controllable as Draco would like. And that is something that Draco needs to put a stop to. An AU world set after Deathly Hallows. Based on the prompt Hermione is a war slave. Not only that, she is Draco’s war slave. Draco is a cruel master, but he is also in love with her. She grows to love him back.

The Beggar-Thief by gravidy - NC-17, 8 Chapters - Hermione Granger doesn’t believe in things that have never been seen. But then, she doesn’t believe in a lot of things anymore. Hermione Granger has enough problems without worrying about Pureblood kidnappings and techno-geeks. The last thing she needs is Draco Malfoy breathing down her neck.

The Lions of December by Gravidy - NC-17, 2 Chapters - She calls me Goliath and I wear the David mask. I’d like to believe we could reconcile the past. Resurrect those bridges with an ancient glance. But my old stone face can’t seem to break her down. She remembers bridges and burns them to the ground.–Excerpts from 7Mary3 “Cumbersome”

Uncoffined by lady_of_clunn - E, 13 Chapters - When all is lost, we are willing to do whatever it takes to survive. 2nd place in the category ‘Best WIP’ in the 2009 dramione_awards on LJ.

Cold Side of the Moon by RZZMG - M, 10 Chapters - Released from Azkaban & tossed into the Forbidden Forest, Hermione Granger must escape the predators & survive for 8 days to earn her freedom. She doesn’t expect to make it knowing Werewolf!Draco Malfoy is somewhere in the forest, too, just waiting for the next victim of The Games to arrive. Dramione. 2013 HP-Darkarts Fest entry. Nom’d HPFanficFanPollAwards-Best Dark Fic. COMPLETE!

The Fool, the Emperor, and the Hanged Man by ianthewaiting - M, 28 Chapters - Ten years after the fall of the Dark Lord, Hermione Granger leads of life of self-imposed obscurity, that is, until the day Headmistress Minerva McGonagall is murdered and a certain ‘hero’ is responsible. DM/HG, written originally in 2007-2008, and finally making its debut here! AU, DH-EWE, non-canon elements, time travel, character death, etc.

Utterly Despicable by camnz - M, 24 Chapters - The death of both Voldemort and Harry Potter let the pureblood elite build the world they wanted. One that leaves Hermione in a vulnerable state, which Draco Malfoy is prepared to take full advantage of.

Manacled by SenLinYu - M, 77 Chapters - Harry Potter is dead. In the aftermath of the war, in order to strengthen the might of the magical world, Voldemort enacts a repopulation effort. Hermione Granger has an Order secret locked away in her mind. She is sent as an enslaved surrogate to the High Reeve, to be bred and monitored until it can be accessed. COMPLETE

The Gift by RZZMG - M, one-shot - After imbibing too much on Christmas Eve, Draco Malfoy decides to give himself a gift: Hermione Granger, his war prize slave. Can her gift of love tame the darkness in his heart? One-shot. Dramione/dark Draco x Hermione. A/U,Post-Hogwarts,EWE. COMPLETE!

Every Way You Look At This by tamlane - R, one-shot - Sometimes it’s difficult to tell who is indebted to whom. Which really has little to do with the means of collection, when you’re a Malfoy.

Save You, Save Me by flipflop_diva - R, one-shot - For five years, Draco Malfoy has kept Hermione Granger hidden away from the Dark Lord’s wrath. In exchange for her life, she’ll do what he says. But Hermione is about to find out that not everything is how it seems.

Worth The Risk by scarletladyy - M, one-shot - The world is a dangerous place for Hermione and other Muggleborns, and when she meets the Death Eater’s most infamous torturer in a dark alleyway, she thinks her life is over, until it turns out that this Death Eater may have a conscience after all.

His One Unforgivable Sin by DramioneInLove - M, 8 Chapters - In a world where Muggle-borns are the “lower class”, Hermione Granger works for Madam Malkin’s as an apprentice. When pure-blood women who have bought dress robes from Madam Malkin’s die mysteriously, Draco Malfoy starts the investigation, and Hermione is his first suspect. DramioneLove fest submission. Winner of Mod’s Choice: Best Dystopian Universe Fic. Warnings inside.

Master by AkashaTheKitty - M, one-shot -The war drags on and Hermione Granger is caught and then bought by her old enemy Draco Malfoy. But why did he do that when he obviously isn’t really interested in using her for anything? AU, very ugly themes, ONESHOT!

The Slow Thaw by camnz - M, 21 Chapters - Hermione is serving at Malfoy Mansion after the war was lost. In her bleak existance, she manages to find ways to cope. Contains nonconsentual. COMPLETE.

Subsistence by ratherbsailing - NC-17, 3 chapters - In times of war, people find different ways to survive.

Squirm by MrBenzedrine - M, 28 Chapters - Written for Halloween, 2016. Dramione. Rated M for non-con themes, as well as implied horror. TRIGGER WARNING. Draco Malfoy falls into a strange obsession with Hermione Granger. But it’s a risk -he holds a dark, sinister secret, and if he becomes too close, she just might find out what it is. Dark Fic. WIP. **WINNER: Best WIP 2017 Winter Dramione Awards** *Complete*

Crimson with a Silver Lining by Lady Cailan - M, 78 Chapters - It is six years since the fall of the Ministry to Voldemort. Those other than purebloods are deemed less than human. When Ginny’s daughter ends up in grave danger, Hermione sells herself to the Death Eaters to save her life. Draco/Hermione. Not fluffy.

His Beautiful, Haunting Eyes by thecellarfloor - M, 14 Chapters - Draco pushed her to the wall, kissed her roughly on the lips, then punched the glass window beside her head. It smashed into pieces and the crowd who had parted for him seconds ago gasped. Hermione couldn’t. She couldn’t even breathe. What have you done?

- AgnMag

[ddaenghoney]

chapter eight

masterlist link in blog description.

As a successful songwriter, you want nothing more than the acknowledgment that the chart-topping musical pieces are your own creations. But contracts, relationships, and the difficulty of facing the stakes involved head on, keep your mouth shut until pressure builds too much.

Pairing(s): Park Jimin x Y/N, Min Yoongi x Y/N

disclaimer: any characters depicted do not represent the actual personality of the respected idol in real life.

Series warning(s)/genre(s): Chapter-based written fic, Slow-burn relationship(s), Fake-dating, Unrequited love, Songwriter/producer!oc, idol!Jimin, idol/songwriter/producer!Yoongi, friends with benefits, drama, romance, smut, angst, fluff (updated as needed)

Chapter warning(s): there’s a very small (paragraph and a half) instance of some guy implied to get angry about oc turning him down, but it’s such a short moment.

Word count: 5347

if you enjoy please, please let me know!

The far wall is an expanse of window facing off on the city surrounding the top of the building, lights twinkling yet hazy. Man-made lighting out in the world creating a cast over those inside the dim party of spotlights flashing around on people that become a blur-- something unable to focus. Just Jimin returning a gaze towards you, feeling like a real luminescence even though his irises only twinkled with the passing strobes above.

How long this feeling of longing would attach itself to you whenever you catch wind of Jimin, you don’t know, but hope you are able to move beyond it soon. Whenever you feel as though you make progress, even in the form of a small step, you still find yourself latched backwards by something regarding him. Whether it is the idea of returning to as you and him were, or just the contradicting answers you’ve found about the relationship, you’re still constantly getting stuck. All because Jimin appears in ways around you like now where he reminds your psyche of his importance in your life, and how much yearning still resides in your heart to be with him again.

After realizing your doubletake turned into a present stare, you swallow thickly, and don’t return that ghosting smile of a greeting he’s sending to you, instead turning on your heel and continuing on. A need to speak to him doesn’t exist outside of the workplace any longer. He’s proven to you that nothing can spark between the two of you multiple times now. You shouldn’t dwell, you should only walk away. Like Jimin has let you.

A bartender greets you after two others, though you take a moment to realize he’s done so, particularly not noticing him until a napkin slides in front of you to house a drink when you give him the word. You think against the idea, if only because of the current state of shock you found yourself having not prepared yourself for the idea of seeing Jimin. It isn’t that big of a deal, you try reasoning, you need to settle in the fact that you’ll always run into him. That you shouldn’t be like this anymore; he isn’t, you shouldn’t.

Yoongi said it’s okay to hurt as long as you need, but you don’t want to. The feeling of longing reminds you of the loneliness. You don’t want it anymore. It makes you feel pathetic.

You want to leave, but you ask for your usual, nodding as the bartender mentions they only have Sprite then goes to make it after you tell him to give it a kick. After you drink it, Yoongi will be back, the conversation will be as short as he told you it would be, and you can both get out of there; nothing to worry about when you’re gone and away. Thanking the bartender, you’re left with a large first gulp hitting the back of your throat.  Positioning your body towards the standing bar counter in solidarity you swirl the thin, black straw around to watch the ice in your glass clatter and shake with the strong beverage within it. If you could say whom you are at least then there’d be something to discuss with the people here, maybe even discussion about collaborative work, but that’s a faraway idea. One outside the spectrum of possibility with how things are.

Then you wonder if Yoongi told Hoseok. He’d mentioned that Yoongi spoke of you to him. Unexpected as it was to hear. Though you didn’t think Yoongi is friendless, or closed-off from telling information about himself, you can’t think of an instance at SoundWave where the people around you knew much about him, and neither did you. Maybe at this company he’s decided to keep work and private life completely separate. With the headlines that ended Hoseok’s career swirling in your memory, you could understand why. But with the mutual disdain between Seulgi, someone directly involved, and Yoongi, who is only a friend of Hoseok, you can’t imagine what went wrong between Yoongi and the couple to create that.

On the second drink you are now standing with hardened eyebrows. If you relate your own situation with Yoongi to whatever happened in his past company you can conclude that there are simply things that weren’t shown. In the way that you’re marketing to the public as Yoongi’s girlfriend, his old company could’ve had their own lies that caused whatever went on. You sigh after a particularly stinging sip, then shake your head at your thoughts to dismiss them: it’s not your business. If Yoongi wants you to know, he would tell you.

Your body shifts, straightening slightly as a man never seen before steps to the bar for a drink, hip nearly bumping against your waist at the proximity. A noticeable pace to the side takes you from him as you just give a meaningfully irritated glower at him in the corner of your eye for the rude mannerism.

He catches sight of it; the smirk you didn’t catch on his face when he walked up smothering at your hardened attitude. You think he’s ready to say something, but then he’s obscured from your view. Replaced by styled, richly brown hair and erect posture clothed in a fine midnight blue blazer. Out of your sight, Jimin gives a stronger glare, wordless, but appearing immovable. The man past him doesn’t find the confrontation worth it and turns to the rest of the bar, moving down.

Your expression doesn’t shift, instead your heart thumps loudly in your chest, and you just sigh again. Because he came--eyed you beyond the silent acknowledgement and paid attention to what you would do. Keeping a protective eye on your person. You finish the latter half of your drink when Jimin’s body turns towards you. Checking.

Jimin thinks of his inability to move his eyes from your person when you walked along from him, unreturning of any greeting. Likely trying to avoid, or keep away. Maybe for the fake relationship with Yoongi’s sake, most logically for yourself to not have to deal with anything like the last interaction in the meeting room with him. Jimin planned to give you that distance; not actively trying to involve himself with you when he realizes there’s so much confusion and pain swarming your thoughts towards him right now. He knows that he should have looked away himself, but he’s always captivated by you. Years have gone by of knowing you at this point, and not a day where he’s been able to avoid letting fondness towards you grow whenever he sees you, thinks about you.

“You didn’t need to do that.” Bitter tone like the kick from the drink invaded your speech.

“I know.” He watches you place the glass on the napkin with a clack, ice inside it sliding around.

“Then why did you?” You huff, avoiding eye contact in favor of watching condensation build, waving off the bartender as he offers you another.

Jimin’s posture must show that he’s not interested in a drink as the man continues past him to other guests. His elbow rests on the counter, though his legs are still straightened in an unrelaxed way. He thinks about your question in silence, admiring the way the overhead lights dance across your dress in the passing minute, creating a shine on your dress, pronouncing the curves of your stance. His throat tightens, because he misses you but can’t. Shouldn’t.

“I didn’t think about it.” Your head turns towards the candor. Finding his focused gaze, you consider the idea that Jimin didn’t mean to say that and expose affinity for you. He still feels warm to look at, like the cusp of being pulled into a hug. Knowing the thoughts will just get you hurt, you push them aside facing forwards once more. Your hands cradling the shadow of your drink are only inches from the one Jimin lays on the counter. It’d be so easy to take hold of, and it sounds nice.

But like it’s a memory. An impossibility.

“Don’t you think you should think about it a little.” You murmur in the mix of distant music. “It’s confusing.”

Jimin hears the frailty of your admission, registering that it still stings you to see him. He knows it would, because it’s the same for him, but he’s tugged towards you like he’s left the atmosphere. Floating unstably and hoping there’s a way to land on two feet. A tug-of-war between logic telling him that he should come back to the ground and emotions that say there’s a way to come out of this differently than the course he’s set the relationship too.

But that option isn’t realistic, and at the very least unfair to you because of what it means under the surface of unspoken words.

“I’m sorry.” Simple. Heavy. You hear the sound like it’s a war within himself. The logical side of your mind should also receive an apology from your emotions who don’t want Jimin to apologize at all, instead relishing in the fact that he still remains protective. Something you should do better to not be so happy about.

You blink hard a couple of times and shake your head, trying to keep reality at the forefront of your mind, and gesture a finger to your drink when the bartender from before sends a glance towards you in his rounds. “Congratulations on releasing the mini album, by the way.” Move on, even if it means forcing small talk. It’ll be easier when it drifts into something like normalcy. “The title track did well, I saw.”

Jimin’s head nods as he bites his lip to hide concern, playing along with the direction of the conversation that you’re attempting for the sake of comfort. “Yeah, it did luckily. A lot of the comments were about the lyrics on the last song.”

You can’t tell if he said that for your sake as a way to satiate your desire for ownership like Jimin used to, or if it is a mindless tidbit of information. There’s not a reason for him to feed your want for acknowledgement over the lyrics anymore, because this is the job you had before meeting him and becoming anything at all to him. Back when it didn’t feel like his compliments on the lyrics were meant to satisfy you, that they were just genuine and the grin he used to have about it was pure-hearted. But now it doesn’t give you positivity at all, instead frustration that flourishes in your rib cage.

“Yeah, I liked the way that one turned out after finishing it. I spent two weeks working on it.” When the sentences fall, they feel like an echo between you. There’s spite where you’re usually giddy to receive the feedback of public perception. You never let that sprouted seed flourish into ivy, but before you realize it the thorns slide into the air. Stabbing into Jimin’s ears like they’d cause an allergy, and he thinks back about what Yerin’s told him in the past. He swallows, both of you watching a fresh glass be placed in front of you while the old one is whisked away.

You take a sip as though it were water that would relieve the tension trying to escape in your voice.

“You should be careful how quickly you drink those, Y/N.” It irritates you that the sincere worry of Jimin’s voice is more soothing than water actually would be. The opposite effect occurs with this thought, because you’re frustrated more that he’s beside you, caring about you inexplicitly, but broke everything between you both.

And you don’t know why. It’s senseless given what he’s told you and expressed verbally about how he feels. That there’s no desire to be with you in a romantic way, yet he’s beside you looking out for your interest like a magnet. “If you don’t love me why are you acting like this?”

The glass releases from your grip on the bartop, eyes widening as you look into its fizzy clearness. A still moment passes like a year before you think to see Jimin’s reaction to your blurted question, but you don’t do it. Too afraid you’d see pity, or awkwardness that he’d have to relay the information to you again about not loving you.

Jimin watches you with his own shocked irises while you scoop the drink back up and down it in nervousness. In any other situation it would almost be comical about your method of moving beyond the question, but he recalls the one you just had before it and the worry is simmering back to mask the surprise from your call out. “You’re going to get dizzy if you drink those that fast, lovely-”

“Stop.” You bite your tongue to stop your voice from raising when you turn to face him, still upset and feeling idiotic, more so as his concerned frown registers in your vision. “I’m not that to you anymore. Don’t call me that-- it hurts, okay? It hurts a lot.”

“Wait-” Jimin’s voice isn’t loud, but its volume raises when you take the first step. Gentle hand finding your wrist. “Where are you going?”

“I don’t know.” You huff, tugging your arm from him and it comes easily. “Why do you care? Just let me walk away again.”

But you don’t want that.

As you continue on you think it’d be best for Jimin to follow you, because that seems right. If he cares this much to intercept you and some random guy, to speak up for your lyrics ownership in the meeting, to tell you vaguely that stopping your relationship is for the best-- if he cares about you in all those instances as much as they would entail then you’d like nothing more than for Jimin to follow and tell you why. Maybe that’s why it feels impossible for you to move on, or fake the healing that he’s already managed to go through since the beginning of the year.

Through the ballroom’s archways you turn past the elevators, unwilling to go to the ground floor because you still need to wait for Yoongi. If there was just some kind of quiet and silence away from that stuffy party than at least you could groan out loud and release the frustration that Jimin puts you into his back-handed affections.

So you try the first door you see, testing it’s handle that turns surprisingly, letting you escape into a much smaller party-space. One absent of people, music, and even decor. Just a few tables, chairs, all unclothed and dull under bulbs that aren’t on. The cityscape across the entrance is enough lighting, though its created with some shadowy lines from the downpour of rain outside.

You take it, walking in further and exhaling, happy to be separate from that party where you felt unable to relax. But your muscles tense again as the door behind you shuts with a small thump, and you turn to find Jimin once more. Your heart rate increases, surprised that he came with you. An enjoyable shocked feeling you didn’t expect.

“You came.” You can hear the relief in your own voice, where it had been frustrated seconds earlier because he never had before. Jimin’s always kept the distance, letting you metaphorically wander far from mutual understanding where he should’ve tried more. Talked to you in the ways he said he would but never did.

“Do you want me to leave?” Testing words as he steps towards you, the appearance of his downcast eyes disrupting the flow of confidence his question gives. You face him as Jimin stops just short of you, at an arm’s length, his chest inhaling air more largely like there are nerves, but his expression doesn’t give that away.

“If you don’t care about me, you should.” You continue locking eyes, unwavering in that moment to see his response; show you the honesty you deserve. That feels closer to the surface, if you could just crack through it a bit more. Maybe it could give you clarity. Jimin’s head tilts shaking gently, and his small smile looks sad,

“It’s never been a problem of not caring about you, Y/N. I do.” You bite your lip to try and hold back your confusion at the flowery voice, and how he seems to look at you like you’re sunlight in the midst of this somberly darkened room. “I care about you so much more than I’ve ever told you, lovely.”

The air you inhale feels like it breaks halfway from his unexpected softness. A frown plays at the corner of your lips at the apparent contradiction: if he cares about you then why all of this. Your mouth opens to question just that, but you stop to watch as Jimin’s eyes fall from yours glancing to the tile beneath your feet.

“It wouldn’t be good if we were a couple though.” You swallow back your nerves and feel an overcoming of frustration when he tells you that again, desperation leaking to get him to level with you as you take the step to meet Jimin. Your hand finds his forearm, jolting him in doing so to find your eyes again as you question quietly, yet firmly,

“Why?” Jimin nonsensically stutters, his whole body tensing like he didn’t think he’d actually be asked, because you hadn’t before. Just going along with his whims because you thought it stemmed from his lack of interest to become more to you due to unreturned feelings, but now that he implies that isn’t the case, how could he expect you to not want to know why. Your head shakes when Jimin bites his lip clearly undesiring to tell you. Maybe even scared. “I,” If these words leave it’d be decisive; inescapable to close a chapter though you have no idea where the next one would lead. You don’t want dwell longer. “I love you, Jimin.”

Jimin’s eyes widen, arm growing limp in your grasp from the unabashed shock. Eyebrows furrow, and you can only smile sadly in response knowing this would be the outcome of unreciprocated feelings--

“You wouldn’t--shouldn’t.” His head shakes and you lock onto the tear escaping down his cheek in a path. He chuckles entirely bitter, free hand reaching up to brush back his hair. You’re silent, uncertain of how to react to this development. You expected another dismissal, not him seeming to be upset with himself for this occurring. As he shudders from his emotions you unconsciously move your hand to find his, hoping to help him calm down. Jimin’s hand wraps around yours immediately, holding it strongly, like he’d lose you to currents if he didn’t.

“Jimin,” You frown further, concern washing over you as you cup his cheek, thumb wiping the tears that flow as much as you can. He looks at you again, taking a moment to appreciate how utterly gentle you are with him despite how much crap he’s put you through. How he wishes he wasn’t an idol or you weren’t a songwriter. How he shouldn’t be selfish, and drag you back towards him time and time again. That he needs to let you walk away far so he can’t follow anymore. “What’s wrong?”

“I love you too, Y/N.” Your thumb halts as a tear comes to rest on it, heartbeat thumping once in your ear like it wanted Jimin to hear. You look at him quietly, thinking that you didn’t hear him correctly, that there’s no way considering all he’s done to separate you both. Maybe he was afraid the entire time that you didn’t feel the same.

His hand releases yours as he moves it to your waist, the other mirroring the action. It feels right again; the familiarity you’re used to returning. Puzzle pieces appearing to fit again and things will be on track again. It makes sense being in his arms, Jimin is still haven for you.

You test if the situation is all a dream by means of the hand on his cheek guiding him the tiniest bit forward. If you speak you may wake up, if there’s anything to interrupt it’d fall apart, and if it was a dream you think your luck would make you wake up before he ever kisses you. But you don’t; Jimin’s motions follow the lead of your hand and his lips find yours softly, slotting to your expectant mouth perfectly.

Your arms fall around his neck, pulling Jimin closer to you while his hands rub along your sides, embrading you against his chest as the kiss remains entirely sweet and full from missing each other. In the enamor how it is to kiss Jimin while your love if mutually expressed, you disregard anything about the outside world, wishing this small room could protect you from it all. Ignore that you’re both under obligations to the company-- the thing that’s probably why Jimin was so worried. You just want to be with him like this, even if things return to a similar state of how they were before, if you’re both upfront about loving one another that’d be enough to get through it. You just want to be his, want to be a couple.

“No-” Jimin tugs back, hands releasing you quickly, though they ghost your frame until you’re steady on your feet. You gaze at him in confusion, breaths softly leaving your lips from the length of time spent kissing him. He shakes his head, stepping back one more time, further than a simple grasp forward. Your stomach knots that he may tell you to forget it all. “Lovely, I meant it; you shouldn’t love me.”

“Jimin, if it’s just about having to be a secret-”

“It’s not that, Y/N!” He cuts you off, voice picking up in his frustration. You realize then that he never asked your question of why you both can’t be together. Why you shouldn’t love him. You spine feels cold all of the sudden, worry prickling along it like Jimin is about to admit to murdering someone, but you dismiss that naivety. Watching Jimin continue biting his lip and appearing beside himself as he stares at you, trying to build up the courage to say whatever it is that’s the problem.

You almost say that anything he needs to tell you can’t be that bad, that there’s nothing he realistically could admit to you as you think it over. Perhaps it’s something self-conscious, or worry about Yerin, maybe he thinks the relationship would just be unsatisfying due to his secrecy; it’s all feasible. You could work through something together with him-- if you both handle it together it’s something that you can overcome, you try to assure yourself that positively.

“I’m on Yerin’s side about your job.” You blink. The quiet overtakes the room. The words are simple, they sound trivial on first listen, but then the depth of information takes over your senses. Your lips part, and Jimin sees your eyebrows creasing. He knows it makes sense but you’re likely blocking the meaning away. “I don’t want you to take credit for any of your songs.”

“What,” You blurt, nearly laughing because he couldn’t actually be saying this. The one reason that a relationship with him wouldn’t work out to Jimin is that it’s because he didn’t side with you. He doesn’t think you should be publicly noted as the creator of so much music that they listen to. All along, he never helped you because he actively disagreed with you. “Why?”

It’s not a small reason. The longer his words sit between you both, the implications feel like multiple daggers; how he’s watched you hurt in dissatisfaction of never receiving attention for your work, how the songs are changed and mended without caring about your consent, how difficult it is for you to appreciate any idol’s album because your name is never scribbled into their lengthy lists of credits. Watch you feel insignificant, disposable, and worried that your invisibility will leave you with nothing if there comes a day the company drops you.

“It’d ruin so many people’s careers, Y/N.” Timid to admit the truth that you’re aware of. You’re painfully aware of it, but always battling with yourself that you shouldn’t be held back for that calculation.

“Yours.” Your eyes narrow but your voice shakes that this is about selfishness. That Jimin’s unwilling to search for an ultimatum because it risks his security, despite the love his fans give him and the acclaim he has.

“Yeah.” Not so timid anymore, though there’s an inkling of more sadness; frustration about himself or the situation. You don’t know. Your head shakes and a scoff escapes your lips as you look away from him, unable to reason how he’s immovable on the subject. “I spent five years as a trainee, Y/N. I barely made the cut the year I did to debut. I,” Jimin sighs, fist clenching beside him as he admits the truth, “I can’t lose it all. I’m not going to be anything if I do-”

“So I’m just supposed to be nothing instead!” You spit at him, glaring with your words though the frustration is filling hot tears in your ducts. Jimin recoils in surprise from your voice’s loud volume and its hurt tone. “I’m just supposed to let you lie to the world using me for your whole fucking career? Like everyone else in the company!”

Jimin’s lip stings between his teeth, knowing that your words are exactly what he wants. There’s clear selfishness and unethical implications of everything this choice makes. How it shows that there’s a scale between you and his career, and that Jimin’s found which one weighs more in his heart. But listening to it stings like it has every right to, and he hates the fact that it’s like this, but what you say doesn’t matter because this is the reality of the situation. All depending on you are the careers of himself and every other person involved in SoundWave, and he doesn’t want to lose it more than he doesn’t want to lose you, so he’s adamant in his frustrated outburst as he bites back,

“You made that choice!”

Now you stumble in your conviction, recalling the moment of greed entirely too well. Knowing presently that in the past you should’ve thought better about that contract, or got a lawyer to look over it with you. You should’ve considered future implications, but you didn’t. This is your fault.

If you fought for rights then, you wouldn’t have problems today.

Jimin exhales, shoulders untensing as the raise of his voice resonates with how much that would’ve hurt you to hear, especially from him. His entire expression is a frown, worriedly trying to comfort, “Lovely-”

“Don’t call me that.” Defeated murmur. Jimin hears that quality, knows this is like he thought. He understands that this is where the divide exists-- knew it ever since you started going on about the idea of wanting your name to be seen after your lyrics. He watches tears drip along your cheeks in the silence, wanting nothing more than to wipe them away and fix this, but he doesn’t want what you do in order for the relationship to be fixed. He knows it’s selfish, inconsiderate, but he doesn’t alter his stance. “You let us fall in love when you knew it’d all fall apart like this, Jimin.”

He feels the cool streams on his face when you speak distantly. Hurt and appalled by his thoughts like he knew would be the case. You’re right, Jimin let this go too far when he should’ve stopped it the second the disagreement was seen. But he already loved you then.

“I’m sorry.” There’s nothing else to say. You nod your head once, bitterly. Feeling abandoned by him being uncaring in the one area of the relationship you would wish for his support the most. But the fact fills you with the troublesome conflict that this is also your fault too.

All because of silence in definitive moments, veiling your feelings with bright, accepting sheer to hide words you should have said.

“I am too.” You wipe away your tears, stepping to move past him. And as you walk along Jimin knows this is the goal he wanted to lead you to no matter how much it hurts him to stand still. You’re better off without him following.

As you step out of the room, your stare is heavy towards the ground, listening to the saddening sound of the door shutting behind you. Leaving Jimin separate from you by your own accord, and you wish that you could lock it just so you’d be unable to waver and try again to find a median. One didn’t exist where you’d be happy, you have to remember that, force it into your head at every thought of Jimin from now on. Love isn’t enough.

Your shoulders tense when you catch shiny, black dress shoes at the top of your peripherals. Head rising slowly, you see Yoongi standing against the wall across from you. A frown forms on his face taking in your somber appearance as his arms uncross in front of him where he appears to have been waiting for some time. He lifts himself from the wall, stepping to you as all the emotions inside of you fill up and feel uncontrollably tear-wrenching. Your lip quivers as you duck from his sight, unable to allow him to see you cry so foolishly for what just happened, but he’s absent of a judgemental atmosphere as his hand reaches for your trembling one.

The gentle nature of his actions cause you to look back up at Yoongi, watching the tiniest curls of his empathetic smiles. Whatever happened in his conversation with Seulgi is lost to your mind, just like how you’re unable to recall that you need to keep up appearances with Yoongi at this party.

And he doesn’t bring up those things either, watching the tears spill silently from your eyes. Yoongi doesn’t ask you what happened, already having seen you walk away with Jimin earlier, he can only assume a number of ways that a conversation with him would cause this outcome. From how torn up you’ve been about the waning relationship between Jimin and you since Yoongi’s met you properly, he had a feeling more would have to happen for change to occur. For your sake, he didn’t hope it’d be this; your eyes reddened from frustration and sadness, posture hanging low from being brought down by whatever was said. Obviously broken-hearted because this seemed worse than any other time, as you’re unable to speak to him and attempt to hide away your feelings like you usually try to.

Your mouth opens, though the choppy inhale in your throat stops words from coming out, instead shoving more tears down your cheek. Yoongi shakes his head, free hand wiping them away before he realizes. “You don’t have to try to be okay right now.”

A hurt whimper leaves your lips at the tenderness he speaks with, making you feel like all of your emotions are about to dribble out of you if he continues to be this accepting of everything you are going through. You just want to thank Yoongi for this and dealing with all of the drama you cause keeping Jimin in your thoughts and making any of his stresses related to this fake relationship probably grow more, but you’re completely unable to without feeling like you’d only get out disarrayed words and tears.

While managing to only release your hand for the second to slide off his sleeve, Yoongi quietly drapes his coat jacket over your bare shoulders to cover any sight of trembling. He gives your hand a reassuring squeeze, coaxing your eyes to try and look up at him as he speaks with warmth you don’t feel deserving of, “Let’s go home.”

if you enjoy please, please let me know! i hope you enjoy the series, i’m working really hard on it! : )

tag list (send an ask to be added): @jaiuneamesolitaiire @tsvkino-usagi @xionysus​