#well said as always jules

[lautity]

they are so intertwined.....no one will ever understand them. not even each other. ESPECIALLY not each other......worst luck Ever to fall in love with a girl who is your direct opposite but also the exact same person......and you can never truly love her the way you want or think she deserves but also it is irrelevant what you think because she looks at you like you're her whole world and You Are. and she is yours. and even if you know it is slowly killing you both she will always be there. even when she's not. the absence of something is also its presence. and one night she's sitting on your windowsill smoking and looking out at the streets and you teasingly say "you know that'll kill you" and she looks back at you and says "so will this, though. so will you" but there's no trace of anger or any indication that she wants it any other way.

i didn't say their name but you thought about them didn't you

they sicken me. the thing killing you is also the only thing keeping you alive in a sort of twisted mutual parasitism. i keep thinking about how they feed into each other's worst traits...... steph is an endless void to be filled with attention and lex is kind of drunk on the feeling of being needed + in control. i need them both dead

okay i got extremely off topic just talking about why they're even together. sorry

lex cant stand most people, because most people are painfully stupid. initially, lex likes her because she's cynical. she isn't an idiot, she doesn't sugar-coat shit, she's anti-authority to a fault. lex was basically born an anarchist, obviously she thinks its hot based when the mayor's daughter commits crimes.

steph thinks they're cool. they live in the grunge-punk scene she's always yearned for (from the comfort of her 4-bedroom home). they play music and smoke weed and don't care what anyone thinks. steph cares too much, all the time, so this is quite impressive.

and getting attention from lex is like drawing blood from a stone. it's so rare and so valuable and steph is very quickly hooked on it. half-smiles and smirks and shotgun kisses and their approval after a smooth shoplifting run. it makes her feel special.

i think steph's. consistency? devotion? is a big appeal for lex. she's just there, all the time, she's down to go anywhere or do anything lex wants, just to be around her. nobody has ever been there for her. and steph doesn't leave when things get hard, despite her background. lex appreciates the commitment, even if she thinks it's stupid. she doesn't know what she's done to deserve it. a Lot of people have failed them. like. basically everyone they've ever met. but they know steph is unconditionally reliable*. maybe lex even feels a little safe around her. maybe. i think this trust persists after they break up (and get back together, and break up, ad nauseam), because steph is truly incapable of moving on from anyone, ever. steph won't let her die. steph will bail her out, steph will protect her, steph will find her next hit, steph will drag her out of hell over and over. the love of a dog for her master is notorious, even in the agony of death. * unconditionally reliable... for lex. your mileage may vary.

i Do think they have to sort of confront how toxic this is, after a major fight. probably a physical fight. probably a physical fight that awakens some feelings about violence. conveniently, they have found a fantastic outlet for all this frustration lex has. it sates steph's desire to be useful and to constantly be giving (because it doesn't feel like love if she isn't tearing herself to pieces). the worse lex treats her, the clingier she gets. it's fascinating.

sigh. sorry. i am actually insane about the levels of fucked up they could achieve though. intentionally triggering your partner.... steph has been known to goad lex to anger (because it's hot). lex may have once or twice accidentally-on-purpose caused steph to split, just. to see. things they're both aware of but not discussing. an open secret. because neither of them really mind. even though it hurts

[astrumocs]

If you're wondering why Jules is so different now, that would be the untreated mental illness,

[hemmingsleclerc]

Reaction┃Charles Leclerc

summary: Charles finds out about Emma's interview on DTS

pt 2!!

The racing season had come to an end and Charles was enjoying some well-deserved time off at home with his wife and young daughter.

One lazy afternoon, they decided to catch up on a recently released movie. They settled into the double bed that he shared with his wife, turned on the TV and were ready to spend an afternoon of relaxation.

As the movie started, Charles scrolled through his phone and casually checked social media. Suddenly, the familiar sound of his phone ringing interrupted the quiet afternoon. Confused, he picked it up and saw numerous notifications flooding in. Curiosity piqued, he opened Twitter and found himself tagged in a video from the latest episode of "Drive to Survive."

He clicked on the video and his confusion grew as the scene unfolded. The camera focused on a familiar face, but it wasn't Charles. It was his daughter, Emma Jules, standing in front of the camera with a small microphone and a huge smile.

Charles leaned forward and his eyes widened in surprise. The interviewer began to ask Emma about her father and what he was like outside the track. Innocent but revealing answers came out of Emma's mouth.

"My daddy is the best here," she began saying, her eyes shining with sincerity.''Sometimes he sings very loud in the car or in the shower. But you know what? He's not very good at it!"

''"He likes to dance while he's cooking with mommy, and he snores really loud when he's asleep. It's funny!"

Charles watched in horror as Emma talked about his private quirks and habits.

''He also cries a lot at Disney or animal movies, or is more interested in playing with my toys than I am. ''

Charles exchanged a bewildered glance with Y/N, who grinned, clearly finding the situation amusing. Emma continued, unaware of her father's growing embarrassment.

''Please tell me I'm dreaming, that Emma didn't actually just say that'' Charles said.

''Sometimes we tell mommy that we are going to grand-mére's house but in reality he takes me to buy new dolls or ice cream.''

''!Wait, what did she just say?'' Y/N asked with a frown.

''Nothing mon-amour, you know how children are, they invent everything'' Charles laughed nervously, trying to avoid his wife's accusatory gaze.

''So that's what they did on the weekends, huh?''

''I have no idea what she's talking about, I swear''

''He also likes to help me make friendship bracelets for my friend and also lets me do his hair and makeup with my princess makeup set that santa gave me for Christmas, he always says that he looks very cute.''

''Jesus Christ, this is not happening, I'm gonna die''

By this point, Y/N couldn't contain her laughter and Charles's face turned several shades of red as he tried to comprehend what had just happened. He didn't expect his daughter to become the star of "Drive to Survive" in such an unexpected way.

The camera then panned slightly, revealing Charles in the background, completely unaware that he was being featured in his daughter's candid interview.

"Looks like you've been exposed, my love."

''!Emma Jules Leclerc, come here right now! You're grounded for life!''

@barcelonaloverf1life

@llando4norris

[hs-is-loml]

You Know This. (cl16)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x best friend!Reader

Summary: moments of charles and reader throughout the years that show they are so obviously meant for each other so carlos gives them a small push. (they are basically together but without the title...)

Warnings: mentions of Jules and Hervé so little angst but the majority is fluff! one kiss? lando swears. cute couple moments of two idiots UNEDITED

a/n: almost forgot how to write compared to the social media AUs i've been doing... hope you enjoy :)

all translations of french below

Chérie = darling

masterlist

19 years old

You stared out the window overlooking the streets of Baku until you heard a sigh from across the room.

“I’m so tired. Is it even worth going through this weekend?” Charles admitted as you looked over to him running his hands over his face while he took a seat on the edge of the hotel bed. “I don’t know if I’ll make it through.”

“No one will blame you if you don’t,” you said walking over to stand in front of him. 

“That’s what they all expect isn’t it?” 

“You’re doing more than enough just being here,” you brought your hands to his face and gently rubbed your thumb along his jaw. 

“I miss him, Y/n. How am I supposed to continue without him?” he whispered while he wrapped his arms around your frame and pulled you closer to lean his head against your stomach. 

You could tell that he had finally reached a breaking point from holding out on his own emotions as he helped everyone in the family with theirs. You knew that he was staying strong for Pascale and Arthur while Lorenzo was handling everything for Hervé’s funeral. When he asked you to accompany him for this race, you said yes without any doubts crossing your mind.   

You soon feel his shoulders shake as he lets out soft sobs. “You continue for him. Just like you have done for Jules, they’re going to watch your legacy grow together. One day you’ll be driving in that red car placing poles and winning races. You will make it through this,” you played with the hair at the nape of his neck as you reassured him.

You were aware that he had told Hervé a few weeks ago that he had signed with Ferrari already. In the past few years, it had always been the goal. Everyone understood how crucial it was for him to make that come true.

“You can’t be sure of that.”

“I know, but I believe in you. We all do. It’s only a matter of time.”

“What would I do without you?” he lifted up his head to look at you.

“Well, it’s a good thing I never plan on leaving you,” you leaned down to press a gentle kiss on the crown of his head. 

"I'll never let you go."

20 years old

You were talking with Andrea and Lorenzo near the Alfa Romeo motorhome while you all waited for Charles to finish with media day. “How do you think he’s doing with the news?” you anxiously looked around in the hope of seeing him heading your way. “The media has gone wild when the contact got out that he signed with Ferrari.”

“Probably basking in the attention,” Lorenzo laughed. “You know how long he’s waited for this.”

“That boy never fails to catch the camera either,” Andrea added while you covered your mouth with your hand trying to stifle your laugh when you realized that Charles was finally done for the day. 

Charles came to your side snaking an arm around your waist and teasingly poked you, “What are you three laughing about you?” 

“You,” all of you replied, causing him to gasp in fake annoyance. 

“I know ma chérie would never do such a thing,” he shook his head at the two men. “Enzo, look how bad of an influence you are.” Which was Andrea’s queue to quietly leave before he was targeted by the young driver too. He took Lorenzo along with him as the older brother gaped at the accusation. 

You both started to head to his driver’s room to gather his things before driving back to the hotel. “How was it?” you asked him while you took out his phone from your purse.

“A lot. It feels like it’s never ending and everyone keeps congratulating,” he smiled and reached out for the phone. 

“I’ve only heard of all the good things so far,” you tell him and hand the phone back to him. 

You had begun to look for your jacket, and it was almost as if he had read your mind, “It’s right here, I’ve got it.”

As you two walked out of the paddock, there were still crowds of fans and photographers lingering around the area hoping to catch a glimpse of one of the drivers. People started to whisper and squeal when they saw Charles place his hat on your head allowing you to shield your face from the now flashing cameras. 

“Who is she?”

“Aww, that’s so sweet!”

“They must be dating.” 

“Charles! Over here!”

“Can you sign this for me please!”

You listened to all the hollers from the crowd as you got into the car, “Wow.”

“You okay?” Charles softly asked and glanced at you before starting to drive back to the hotel.

“Were they always like that while you were in F2 and I’ve never noticed?” you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. 

“I’m not sure,” he chuckled at your reaction. 

21 years old

“He has one more corner!” you held onto Andrea’s arm anxiously looking at the screen.

“MERCEDES THREW EVERYTHING AT HIM TODAY… CHARLES LECLERC HAS COPED BRILLIANTLY!” you heard from the speakers.

“HE’S GOT IT!” one of the crew members screamed when they saw Charles shoot down to the line.

“HE WINS IN SPA, HE WINS IN MONZA! CHARLES LECLERC IS THE WINNER OF THE 2019 ITALIAN GRAND PRIX!” David Croft announced as Charles crossed the finish line. He had just won in Monza in front of the infamous Tifosi. 

You felt yourself get pushed to the front of the barrier as people started rushing to see the winner. The momentous scene couldn’t have been better. He had just ended the nine-year winless streak in Monza and scored his second consecutive race win. All you could hear in the hectic moment was the Ferrari crew chanting out in Italian for Charles. The crowds of fans roared out in cheers and the stands filled with raised Ferrari and Italian flags. 

You will never forget the moment he jumped down from on top of his car and made his way over to you. His hands found your sides as you held the sides of his helmet. “You did it,” your smile wide and eyes filled with tears as you focused on him. 

“For them,” he told you tenderly.

“For them,” you repeated and placed a kiss right where you thought the corner of his mouth would have been. The crew reached over to congratulate him, and the cameras were pointed directly at him wanting to capture the moment. 

The podium ceremony was scintillating. The crew, media, and Tifosi all packed in to see their winner. Andrea knew to keep you close to the front knowing that Charles would want to see you more than anyone else. It wasn’t only you looking up at him in admiration though it seemed like the world stopped for a moment when he blew a kiss back down to you from the podium.

Your cheeks flushed from the action and beamed as you met his eyes, “I love you,” you mouthed to him hoping he could read your lips from the stand. 

“I love you,” he replied back.  

22 years old

With COVID delaying the F1 season and everyone having to quarantine. You and Charles had decided to move in together into his apartment to keep each other company. It wasn’t hard to fall into a routine for you two. 

“Y/n! Can you bring me water please?” you heard a yell from Charles’ gaming room.

You got up from the couch and set aside your book heading into the kitchen. Decided to bring him a small pack of crackers as well along with the water since he had been on stream for a while. You brought the plate to him which he thanked you for and gave your hand three small squeezes. 

The simple interaction caused the chat to make tons of new comments flow through regarding you. Over the past few years, you found yourself more comfortable with your life in front of the camera because of his career, and it makes you look back to the times of Charles’ first year in F1. You could now give a small wave to the camera before you planned to head back out to the door.

“That’s not fair,” you heard Lando complain from the screen, causing you to halt in your footsteps to listen closely. “You have Y/n to bring you stuff, and you don’t even need to stop the game.”

“Lando’s just jealous he doesn’t have anybody,” George snickered.

“Damn right, I am,” Lando huffed out. “I want a Y/n.”

Charles noticed you silently laughing and he motioned for you to come back over wanting to tease Lando a bit more. He wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you in closer to be in the frame, “Too bad there’s only one of her.”

Lando started muttering about how it was not his fault that he was alone during these times all while you shook your head at their antics. Alex and George continued the jokes creating a newfound argument that moved the topic away from you and Charles. “What do you want for dinner?” you questioned him softly not wanting to disrupt the chaotic banter from the others.

“Will you make carbonara?”

“DID YOU HEAR THAT??” Lando pointed to the screen baffled. “SHE EVEN COOKS DINNER FOR HIM! WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN? Y/N, WILL YOU COOK FOR ME NEXT TIME?”

“Sure, Lando. Once quarantine ends we can plan something out,” you replied with a sweet smile towards the camera.

“YES!” he cheered out at your response.

“Once we get back to racing, will you bring your cookies again?” George asked excitedly.

“Or the muffins!” Alex added on. 

“I’ll go and bring them if you bring Lily, Alex!” you answered them.

24 years old

You told Charles earlier in the week telling him that you couldn’t make it to the Bahrain Grand Prix due to work. Really you just wanted to surprise him, and you had been in contact with Carlos planning it out.

“I think he is getting suspicious of me,” Carlos told you over the phone as you got your bags together waiting for Carlos’ cousin to come and get you from the airport.

“Well, I’ve only sent him short messages for the past few days and maybe ignored a couple of his calls because I can’t keep lying to him…” you explained which caused the man on the other side of the phone to snicker at your dispense. 

“I swear you want him to kill me, Y/n. Once he finds out.”

“Find out what? Who are you talking to all the time, mate?” you listened to Charles continuously question Carlos.

"No one!" Carlos quipped.

"Is that Y/n?" Charles asked him.

"No, it's my sister..."

“Good luck!” you hung up the call quickly and got into the car with Carlos Oñoro.

“Charles found out?” he started heading to the hotel that the Ferrari team was staying at. 

“Hopefully not yet, but Carlos was talking about how he’s on to him already.”

A notification went off on your phone and you saw it was a text message from Carlos.

You opened your messages with Charles and came up with something quick to text him about.

at the circuit 

“Hermosa! You made it!” Carlos exclaimed when he saw you walking towards the group of the drivers that just got out of the media pen. "I swear he was going to choke me earlier."

You laughed at his remark and went over to his side to whisper to him, “He doesn’t know I’m here yet, right?”

He tugged you a bit closer and kept his hand on your upper back. He spoke into your ear in a hushed tone while carefully looking around, “Not a clue, but you remember what I said over text? You say he’s not your boyfriend yet, so let’s mess with him just a little. It’ll prove something to you.”

“Prove what-” 

You were cut off by Lando as he finally took notice of your presence, “Y/n! Tell me you brought them!”

“Yes, Lando,” you smiled, taking a small packaged bag of cookies out of your bag before you could even hand them to him. He had snatched it and already begun opening the bag. “Yours are back at the hotel,” you told Carlos who was trying to take one from Lando.

“GIVE ME ONE!” George yelled at Lando who took his chance and ran off with his cookies. 

“NO!” causing George to chase after the Mclaren driver. 

Another group of drivers came over as they had just finished with their interviews. You saw Charles talking with Sebastian but he didn’t see you yet. “Sweetheart! A pleasant surprise, Charles was just talking about how you couldn’t make it,” Sebastian said with a smile as he walked past you with Fernando. 

“Hello, Sebastian,” you smiled back and felt a breath near your ear. 

“How long do you think it will take him to drag you away?” Carlos said in a low voice.

“He wouldn’t,” you mutter back.

“Oh, yes he would. Good luck with him,” Carlos grinned as Charles had stormed over to you two and grabbed a hold of your wrist.

“Charlie!” you yelped as you tried to keep up with his pace towards the Ferrari’s motorhome and into his driver’s room. 

He shut the door behind him, “So you can text Carlos but not me?”

"What are you talking about?" you acted confused."

"I know you were on call with Carlos earlier. But you couldn't even answer mine this morning?"

“It was supposed to be a surprise, Charles,” you huffed out.

“What a surprise that you and Carlos are together now?” he scoffed at the mere thought.

You began to laugh aloud which caused him to frustrate even further, “E-ex-cuse me?” you said through your laughter.

“This is not funny, Y/n.”

“Charles, it’s funny you think that I would even do anything with Carlos in the first place,” you pointed out to him while setting your bag down on a chair. 

You heard his footsteps come closer to you until you felt him press against your back, “Are you not?”

You turned around to face him and took his face in your hands, “Of course not.”

“Good,” he placed his hands on your waist rubbing up and down your sides.

“And why is that?” you raised your eyebrow at him.

“Y-you kno-o-ow b-b-because you’r-re…” he trailed off a stuttering mess caught off guard by your question.

You stroke his jaw with your thumbs and brought his face closer to yours, “Charles, I’m yours. You know this.”

He leaned down and closed the gap between your lips in a long-awaited kiss. He kissed you gently as if he were testing the waters. You smiled against his lips and moved to wrap your arms around his neck as his hands moved to your hips. You moved forward slightly to lean more into him and he let out a groan against your mouth. He stilled in the kiss, keeping your hips in place from moving further. 

“No more surprises, okay?" he said as you separated.

"Okay, but no more jumping to conclusions either."

"You are going to give me gray hairs early, Chérie," he exasperated.

[txttletale]

niceys positive anon!! i don't agree with you on everything but you are so clearly like well read and well rounded that you've helped me think through a lot of my own inconsistencies and hypocrises in my own political and social thought, even if i do have slightly different conclusions at times then u (mainly because i believe there's more of a place for idealism and 'mind politics' than u do). anyway this is a preamble to ask if you have recommended reading in the past and if not if you had any recommended reading? there's some obvious like Read Marx but beyond that im always a little lost wading through theory and given you seem well read and i always admire your takes, i wondered about your recs

it's been a while since i've done a big reading list post so--bearing in mind that my specific areas of 'expertise' (i say that in huge quotation marks obvsies i'm just a girlblogger) are imperialism and media studies, here are some books and essays/pamphlets i recommend. the bolded ones are ones that i consider foundational to my politics

BASICS OF MARXISM

friedrich engels, principles of commmunism

friedrich engels, socialism: utopian & scientific

karl marx, the german ideology

karl marx, wage labour & capital

mao zedong, on contradiction

nikolai bukharin, anarchy and scientific communism

rosa luxemburg, reform or revolution?

v.i lenin, left-wing communism: an infantile disorder

v.i. lenin, the state & revolution

v.i. lenin, what is to be done?

IMPERIALISM

aijaz ahmed, iraq, afghanistan, and the imperialism of our time

albert memmi, the colonizer and the colonized

che guevara, on socialism and internationalism (ed. aijaz ahmad)

eduardo galeano, the open veins of latin america

edward said, orientalism

fernando cardoso, dependency and development in latin america

frantz fanon, black skin, white masks

frantz fanon, the wretched of the earth

greg grandin, empire's workshop

kwame nkrumah, neocolonialism, the last stage of imperialism

michael parenti, against empire

naomi klein, the shock doctrine

ruy mauro marini, the dialectics of dependency

v.i. lenin, imperialism: the highest stage of capitalism

vijay prashad, red star over the third world

vincent bevins, the jakarta method

walter rodney, how europe underdeveloped africa

william blum, killing hope

zak cope, divided world divided class

zak cope, the wealth of (some) nations

MEDIA & CULTURAL STUDIES

antonio gramsci, the prison notebooks

ed. mick gidley, representing others: white views of indigenous peoples

ed. stuart hall, representation: cultural representations and signifying pratices

gilles deleuze & felix guattari, capitalism & schizophrenia

jacques derrida, margins of philosophy

jacques derrida, speech and phenomena

michael parenti, inventing reality

michel foucault, disicipline and punish

michel foucault, the archeology of knowledge

natasha schull, addiction by design

nick snricek, platform capitalism

noam chomsky and edward herman, manufacturing consent

regis tove stella, imagining the other

richard sennett and jonathan cobb, the hidden injuries of class

safiya umoja noble, algoriths of oppression

stuart hall, cultural studies 1983: a theoretical history

theodor adorno and max horkheimer, the culture industry

walter benjamin, the work of art in the age of mechanical reproduction

OTHER

angela davis, women, race, and class

anna louise strong, cash and violence in laos and vietnam

anna louise strong, the soviets expected it

anna louise strong, when serfs stood up in tibet

carrie hamilton, sexual revolutions in cuba

chris chitty, sexual hegemony

christian fuchs, theorizing and analysing digital labor

eds. jules joanne gleeson and elle o'rourke, transgender marxism

elaine scarry, the body in pain

jules joanne gleeson, this infamous proposal

michael parenti, blackshirts & reds

paulo freire, pedagogy of the oppressed

peter drucker, warped: gay normality and queer anticapitalism

rosemary hennessy, profit and pleasure

sophie lewis, abolish the family

suzy kim, everyday life in the north korean revolution

walter rodney, the russian revolution: a view from the third world

[starkwlkr]

Ok this is a bit strange but could you do a Ruby fic where she's scared charles and yn are going to get a divorce because she heard them arguing and she's asking uncle pierre what's going to happen

two birthdays | charles leclerc

sorry for the wait!! here’s more baby leclerc <3

Ruby knew what divorce meant. A friend from school had explained it to her one day after she said she had to spend the weekend with her dad. Ruby also knew that her parents would never get a divorce, they were too in love with each other. At least that what she thought.

After coming home from school, Ruby heard her parents’ voice in the kitchen. Pascale had offered to pick up Ruby from school since Y/n had just given birth to Mathéo and Charles was taking care of her. The older woman heard the loud voices and knew that Ruby wasn’t meant to hear that.

“Ruby, ma fille, go up to your room. I’ll come and get you in five minutes.” Pascale instructed.

Ruby always listened to her grand-mère so she did what she was told. She hesitated a bit, but she made her way up the stairs and towards her bedroom. She had never seen or heard her parents fight so she was extremely confused. Was her family going to end up like her friend’s family?

“It’s kinda cool because I get two of everything. I get two birthdays so that means I get more presents!”

But Ruby didn’t want two birthdays. She didn’t care if two birthdays meant having more presents. Ruby would rather have no presents.

Exactly five minutes later, Pascale arrived to Ruby’s room. “Guess what?” The woman tried to put on a smile. “You get to stay with me tonight. We can bake cookies, watch Barbie the mermaid one, you love that movie, don’t you?”

Ruby nodded. “Why can’t we watch it here? Papa and maman love it too.”

Pascale sighed. “Your maman needs rest and your papa has work to do. Remember his race is coming up so he has to focus on winning.”

Ruby nodded once more. She didn’t question her grand-mère again so she just began to pack a bag.

It was summer break for Ruby and for some ‘unknown’ reason (to her) she was on her fourth plane flying to a new location. Each night she would ask Charles to call her maman so she could say goodnight. When she handed the phone back to Charles, she fully expected him to say goodnight as well but he would always end the call.

Silverstone was coming up. Ruby wasn’t sure if her maman and Théo were coming. She wanted them to come since she hadn’t seen them in a while, but it was confirmed by Charles that they were still in Monaco.

When the father and daughter arrived to the paddock, Ruby saw that Kika and Pierre had also arrived. “Papa, Uncle Pierre and Aunt Kika are here too.” Ruby pointed out.

Charles nodded.

Ruby had asked Charles if it was okay if she spent the day with Kika since her maman was home and she knew Charles was going to be busy for a while. Kika happily accepted having Ruby by her side so together the two girls made their way to the Alpine garage.

Kika noticed how quiet the little girl was being. Usually Ruby would run around and talk nonstop, but now she was basically silent the whole time. “What’s wrong, Ruby Jules? Are you cold? I think Uncle Pierre has a jacket you can wear.”

“I’m not cold, Aunt Kika. I’m sad.” Ruby replied as she held Kika’s hand.

“Why? What made you sad?” Kika asked.

“Maman and papa were fighting. Now they don’t talk to each other and I miss my maman.” Ruby said in a low voice.

Kika tried her best to comfort the girl as they arrived to the Alpine garage. She immediately called for Pierre.

“What’s going on? Why are you sad, bébé?” Pierre picked up Ruby in his arms.

“She heard Charles and Y/n arguing.” Kika informed him.

“I don’t want two birthdays.” Ruby admitted.

“What do you mean?” Pierre was confused by what she meant.

“My friend from school said she gets two of everything because her papa and maman are divorced. I know what that means. Papa and maman are going to divorce.” Ruby began to tear up.

“Mon chéri, your papa and maman love each other so much. Sometimes adults argue but your parents are too in love to divorce.” Pierre tried to explain.

“Do you and Aunt Kika argue? Are you getting a divorce?” Ruby wondered.

“Well we have to get married first.” Pierre lightly chuckled.

“When are you getting married?”

“You are very curious today, Ruby Jules.”

[elmushterri]

2K followers on tumblr and 30K subscribers on YouTube! In celebration, here’s my story. Not a rewrite. This is all a work in progress and subject to change.

Being a HEMA fencer, I’ve wanted a story semi-based on actual swordsmanship and actual fencing techniques.. but fantasy.

It’s a story like… Spiderverse meets Steven Universe meets Owl House meets She-Ra.

It’s called

The Knight’s Handbook

——————

It’s modern Earth but there are supernatural people who protect it like guardian angels called Knights: Humans who’ve died via sacrificing themselves for someone else, and have been revived (not by choice). They protect humans from things as small as tripping over to protecting them from demons, dragons and other dangerous entities.

A Knight can pull their weapon from a magical, glowing scar called their Mortal Wound, the injury they acquired and a sign of the end of their mortality, like how SU Gems can pull their weapons from their gems. A Knight’s weapon can be anything including guns and crossbows, but these shoot magic/energy bullets or arrows.

Knights have their own realm to go to just for each other, (Gallantia) but can live on Earth hiding as normal humans if they wish (so long as they hide the magic scar!)

They function a bit like bees in that there is a Queen, chosen instantly when someone dies by sacrifice according to ‘qualifications of their soul’ (So not completely random like other Knights). Of course, this only happens when the former Queen is killed. Never have there been two Queen Knights at once, so written history goes. Like bees, that would create a huge issue!

Here is the main character and the main antagonist. For the first time apparently ever, there are Two Queen Knights. A mistake of nature, perhaps?

Sidra Saiffudeen

Our main enby is Sidra, she/they. A normal teen turned Queen Knight chosen right after her death, impaled through the chest (where you can see her Mortal Wound symbol) by saving her father. Her design is based on a bee! Not all Knights’ designs are, but I thought I’d lean into Queen Bee stuff.

She’s the ‘Acknowledged’ Queen. Most Knights, ones in support of the past Queen who just died (it’s a mournful period), back Sidra, but think she’s a bit immature. Sidra adores her new people though and vows to be a good Queen. Knight Queens don’t just sit back like Earth Royalty, they’re the most powerful and therefore in battle a lot. The past Queens tended to be adults (The Captain of the Royal Guard was in love with the past Queen (sapphics >:) ) and so having Sidra around is painful but they do their best to teach her.

Then there’s Juliana Fontana, always called Jules. She… is also a Queen Knight. You can tell this because a Queen’s mortal wound symbol is always the same as the Knight Symbol, a sword. Some Knights went traitor to back Jules rather than Sidra. Jules is a very very tired and sneaky girl, but more academically intelligent than Sidra. She’d be a very different Queen, and that’s why the Knights that took her side did so! She hasn’t figured out how to access her weapon or knight form.

The twist? They haven’t seen each other for a long long time… but Sidra and Jules know each other.

Info on Weapons, Mortal Wounds and Knight Forms.

Lastly, The Title’s “The Knight’s Handbook”… what are Knight Handbooks?

Well, for Knights, along with a weapon you can pull from your Mortal Wound, you also have your Handbook! Every Knight has a Handbook with their symbol on it. Like I said, Queen Knights don’t get their own unique personalised symbol, rather they get the default symbol representing all Knights as a species (unfortunate!).

Every Handbook is personalised except for the first couple pages and chapters. The first few pages *always* contain The Rules of Knighthood. One of which is that there Cannot Be Two Queens. But… have these Handbooks with their strict rules on who your friends and enemies are and what you can or cannot do always been a part of the Knights? Or did someone *write* these books for their own purposes? Control?

Handbooks also contain info on how to fight/fence, how to defeat certain entities, anatomy, etc (I’ll figure out more). But, Handbooks also serve as phones! You write something in your handbook for someone else and your writings will appear in *their* handbook! Not sure, but I imagine handbooks can also be used as little sketch hologram projectors (you sketch a map for example or a plan and project it into the air using your book.)

Sidra and Jules may have this giant plot going on around them because they happen to be Queens, but that doesn’t mean they’re not teenagers who want to have fun. A lot of Knights are kids and teenagers and still have their senses of fun, much to the dismay of the serious adult Knights. But they’re all immortal so they’ve got plenty of time to grow up before they hit an age to stop. Being a Knight is tough and scary cause you *could* die at any time in a fight, so adult Knights tend to protect the teens from going out before they’ve trained properly. Queens are not afforded such a luxury and besides, a lot of teen Knights are totally reckless regardless of what the adults say!

So yeah!

That’s an intro to The Knight’s Handbook. I’d love for people to join in like they did with GunnTech and make their own Knights for this, if you feel inspired. It’s kinda like a DTIYS but instead of Draw This In Your Style, it’s… Draw Your Sona for this concept? Working title… /j If you wanna do something, I suppose tag it with “The Knight’s Handbook” with the apostrophe and whatnot, but I do not expect anything, you guys already do so so much 🧡.

Any art or ocs of The Knight’s Handbook will definitely be featured on my next YT vid and I’ll be reblogging (Plus I would love to draw you guys’ ocs, and basically consider them canon since there’s an infinite number of Knights in TKH!)

Thank you for all your support, guys!

[sunny44]

Stubborn

Paring: Carlos Sainz x Leclerc!reader

Warnings: mentions of surgery, appendix removed, sickness and maybe other things

Summary: Carlos insists on going to the race even after just having surgery.

This story is the second part of Secret Love, but if you haven't read the first part you'll understand this chapter here without any problem. But I would recommend you read it.

Today was race day and we were getting ready to leave the hospital. Since the surgery went well, they discharged Carlos.

“Honey, I’ve finished packing your things. Can we go to the hotel and…” At that moment, he emerged from the bathroom wearing the Ferrari shirt. “Why are you dressed like that?”

“We’re heading to the Paddock,” he said. I looked at him in disbelief.

“Of course not, are you crazy? You just had surgery and you already want to go back there?”

“Honey, I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not. You have stitches in your stomach and you already want to go there? You’re not even going to race.”

“Babe.”

“No, listen, if you want to go, fine.” I angrily threw the rest of his things into the backpack. “But I’m not going with you.”

“Y/n.”

“No, I went through hell yesterday fearing something might happen to you, only for you to tell me you want to go there to watch the race.” I zipped up the backpack. “I hate this, you and Charles are just the same.”

“What does your brother have to do with this?”

“That you both have this reckless tendency to put your lives at risk for stupid things.” I tried to control myself from crying. “I won’t have another one in my life who makes me go through this.”

Before he could say anything, his father entered the room, and I stormed out, heading back to the hotel.

It’s things like this that makes me angry. I already have two brothers who are always putting themselves in danger and often doing unnecessary things. I never used to be so afraid of these things until Jules’ death. It was a dark moment in our lives, and knowing that he died in a way that my two brothers and now my boyfriend could also die leaves me extremely worried and on the verge of having a panic attack.

So the fact that he wants to go to the paddock to watch the race after surgery makes me furious.

When I got to the hotel, I went straight to take a shower, dried my hair, and put on pajamas since I would be here the rest of the day. I ordered room service and turned on the TV to watch the race, and immediately saw Carlos entering the paddock. He was walking slowly because of the surgery, and I just shook my head and settled back into bed.

Midway through the race, I was packing my bags since I would be catching a flight to Monaco early tomorrow morning when the door suddenly opened scaring me and Carlos walked into the room.

“Hey,” he said, closing the door.

“Hey.” I finished packing my suitcase and placed it on the floor.

“Leaving?”

“We have a flight to Monaco tomorrow morning, so…”

“Are you staying at my place or…”

“I’m staying at my mom’s.”

“I thought you were staying with me.”

“That was before this morning.”

“Y/n…”

“I’m not trying to control you or tell you what to do, but you were extremely irresponsible with your health today by going to the race, which could harm your recovery.”

“I know.”

“And yet you went.”

“But I’m here, I came back because I knew you were right and…” He stopped because he winced in pain.

“Lie down.” I took his hand and helped him onto the bed, lifting his shirt. “Did you changed this today?”

“Not yet.” I sighed and got the things I had bought earlier in the morning, starting to clean the wound. “Ouch.”

“Sorry,” I said, finishing cleaning and applying a new dressing. “Here are your medications, they might make you a bit drowsy, so you’ll probably fall asleep.”

“I’m really sorry,” he said again. “Charles didn’t explain the reason, but he told me this upsets you.”

“Yeah, it does.”

“Do you want to tell me why?” He opened his arms, and I lay down on his chest.

“It’s because Jules died doing what you and my brothers do.” He hugged me tighter. “And I remember vividly the pain I felt when they buried him, leaving only memories and grief.”

“I’m sorry you feel that way and that I contribute to what scares you.”

“I don’t mind your job; I like seeing you do what you love and achieving your dreams. But I can’t help feeling scared every time you, Charles, or Arthur get into those cars.” I sighed and started tracing circles with my fingers on his chest. “It’s just that I don’t know if I could handle it if something happened to any of you. It’s not about the surgery; I just want to prevent anything from happening to you guys over something as trivial as going to watch the race in person after having your appendix removed.”

“I’m sorry for not realizing that and for ignoring your advice to rest.”

“It’s okay, I should have been honest about what was scaring me.”

“Are we okay?” he asked.

“We are.” He smiled and kissed my forehead. “But from now on, if you do something like this again, you’ll have to work a lot harder for my forgiveness. I’m just being nice now because you’re recovering.”

“Okay, that’s fair enough for me.” We switched positions, and he lay on my chest. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Bonus scene!

Carlossainz instagram stories

“Thank you all for the love messages you’ve been sending to me, it has certainly helped me a lot. I'm still recovering but with the help of all my team and my wonderful girlfriend I'm getting better every day." Tagged: Y/nleclerc

[mariclerc]

Hiiii,,

Im in a very angsty mood and was wondering if u could write charles x driver!reader where reader gets in a crash similar to jules’? Maybe have her in the hospital for a bit and charles is scared that he’ll lose her? Thanks ahead of time. Hope u have a nice day!

thanks for this request! I made the effort to write angst, since it is the first time I do it. I hope you like it!!

Fighter | cl16

Summary: where you have a serious accident on the track and Charles's memories of it aren't the most pleasant ones.

Warning: a little bit of angst, a worried and scared Charles, injured reader, some swearing.

a/n: This is the first time I've tried to write angst, so sorry if it's not quite perfect. There's going to be a little point of view from Charles. Let me know if you want a part two of this <3

Part 2

“Are you excited about the race, coeur?” Charles asks you as you enter the paddock. (heart)

You nod. “Yep! I think we can give Red Bull a good fight, and you? Are you excited?” you ask him as you stop to sign some autographs for the fans.

“As long as you don't pass my shiny red car on track, everything's fine.” He says and you roll your eyes with a smile, he giggles.

You two have been a couple for years, specifically since you were both racing in European F4, and although it took you a bit to get up to F1, you finally did it and this was your fifth season. You currently race for Mercedes and there is always that rivalry with the Prancing Horse, a rivalry which you both do not pay much attention to since, if it were up to you, you would support each other on the track as you do off track. You are the most loved and appreciated couple in the paddock, people love the dynamic of the two of you, how you are with each other and so on, and knowing each other from karting and then being a couple and staying together until now is not for everyone.

“Well, I think it's time, see you honey!” you said as you walked up to him to give him a kiss on the cheek. “Be safe, okay?”

“You too chérie!” He said as he also gave you a kiss on the cheek and you both walked to your respective teams. “Love you!”

You enter the Mercedes hospitality and go up to your driver's room and change into your racing suit and then go to the starting grid. Everyone was making the final preparations to start the race and the formation lap, you start in 4th position behind Fernando Alonso and in front of Esteban Ocon, maybe you have to make a good start, but you are confident that you can reach the podium together with Max —who starts first and Charles —who starts second... It's going to be a busy race.

***

So far the race is going well, already in the last part of the race, you are in third place fighting with Max for second place, there is a chance of rain but nothing to worry about...

Or at least that's what you thought...

The track began to get very wet even though it was a "light drizzle" and overtaking became a difficult task, likewise, no driver went into the pits to change tires and there was no warning from the FIA as to whether the drizzle was going to evolve into a storm.

Fighting with Max for second place, you got lost and the car took a turn until the nose was almost inside the net that separates the track from the stands, your head, despite having the helmet, was pushed back... You only remember the big impact against the barrier and your head going numb.

Charles' pov

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, please tell me y/n is okay?” I tell my track engineer as I see Y/n's car under the barrier.

“Apparently not, but they say she's fine.” my engineer answers.

But of course she's not fine, fuck it, she's not fine at all. All the cars line up on the pit line while y/n's strong crash repeats on the screens of the circuit, I get out of the car upset and needing answers.

“Shit, shit shit. Why the hell didn't they report about the rain? They think this is a fucking game?” I say to myself as I take off my helmet and throw it somewhere in the box, Andrea hands me a bottle of water and I take it. “I don't understand, I... The same thing can't be repeated, fuck it.” I murmur as I place my head in my hands. “It's incredible that years go by and the same old fucking shit is always repeated, because of them and their inability.”

Upon hearing over the circuit loudspeakers that the race was not going to resume, Andrea takes me to the Ferrari hospitality and I go up to my driver's room where I change out of my racing suit for my Ferrari t-shirt and a pair of jeans, I don't mind going to the "podium" like that and standing in first place, I just need to know if she's okay.

A couple of years ago I lost important people thanks to the same reason: a racing accident, both were horrible accidents that left a mark on me but none like the one I just witnessed. First it was my sports godfather, Jules, his accident left me scarred for life, thanks to this a new safety device was implemented —which doesn't do much to be honest. He died thanks to an accident that left him in a coma for months... Every day I went with my father to the hospital to see him, to see if he was still with us. Then it was one of my childhood friends thanks to karting, Anthoine, It was in an F2 race on the same circuit where hours later I would take the pole position that would give me my first victory in F1, but what happened to him was instantaneous... The next day they announced that he had passed away, my first victory was dedicated to him.

Just as I'm on my way to the "podium" Fred and Toto pull me from the side. “They take y/n to the hospital.” Fred says looking at me.

“Shit... Fuck, why her? Damn tell me if she's...” I couldn't finish speaking because Toto interrupted me.

“Go with her kid.”

“We'll take care of the rest, but go with her.” Fred says, patting me on the back and I run to Andrea to look for my things in the hospitality so I can go, I feel frustrated with myself and I know it's not my fault, but I wish it hadn't happened to her.

***

The sterile white of the ceiling swims into focus as your blurry vision starts to clear a little but you can't fully open your eyes. A rhythmic beeping cuts through the silence of the room. You try to speak, but your throat feels raw and unused. Strained voices filter in from beside your bed.

“...How long has it been? Do they know anything yet?” says Charles with his voice tight with worry.

A female voice is heard, calm but firm. “Mr. Leclerc, we're doing everything we can. The doctors will be with you shortly to explain the results of the scans.”

”But it's been hours!” says Charles with cracked voice. ”Can't they just tell me if she's going to be fucking alright?”

You hear the soft rustle of clothing and a sigh. The beeping quickens slightly.

“We're doing everything we can, dear. She's a strong girl.” The nurse says leaving the room.

He squeezes your hand again, his voice dropping to a frustrated whisper. His eyes don't leave your face.

“Just like Jules... just like Anthoine... why does this always happen? Why you my dear?” he says to himself. “I wish... I wish it had been me and not you amore.”

The door creaks open and the doctor enters the room. Charles straightens up, a flicker of hope in his eyes.

“Doctor, you have an update?” Charles asks.

“We've run some additional tests. There seems to be a minor head injury causing some swelling. It's putting pressure on...”

Charles doesn't wait for him to finish. “Is it serious? When will she wake up?”

The doctor sighs. “It's difficult to say for sure, Mr. Leclerc. Head injuries are unpredictable. But we're monitoring her closely.”

Charles lets out a defeated sigh. The doctor places a hand on his arm.

“She's a fighter, Mr. Leclerc. Just like you.” The doctor says and then leaves the room and gives way to the nurse.

Charles manages a weak nod, his gaze returning to your still form. He leans closer, his voice barely a whisper.

“Come on y/n, wake up. We have a race to win... together.” he whispers.

A faint flicker of movement beneath your eyelids goes unnoticed by everyone in the room. A single tear rolls down your cheek, tracing a path through the dust collected on your hospital gown. The faint movement under your eyelids becomes more pronounced. Your brow furrows slightly, as if struggling against the weight of unconsciousness. A soft groan escapes your lips.

Charles' head snaps up, his eyes widening in disbelief. He leans in closer, his voice thick with emotion.

”Y/n? Can you hear me love?” Charles says whispering.

Your eyes flutter open, blurry and disoriented. The harsh fluorescent lights of the hospital room assault your vision. You let out a low moan, squeezing your eyes shut again in protest.

“Hey, hey, easy. It's okay, you're safe, you're in the hospital.” he says urgently.

A wave of nausea washes over you. You try to speak, but your throat feels raw and scratchy. ”Charles...?” you say weakly.

Your voice comes out in a hoarse rasp, it's barely a whisper, but to Charles, it's the sweetest sound in the world. A relieved smile breaks across his face.

“There you are! Don't you ever scare me like that again, okay?” His voice slightly breaks.

He reaches out and gently tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear. His touch is warm and comforting, the nurse speaks.

“How are you feeling y/n?” the nurse asked softly.

You try to lift your head, but a sharp pain shoots through it. You wince and let out a small cry.

“Easy, easy, don't try to move princess.” he says concerned.

“What... What happened Charles?” you said with a little confusion in your voice.

“You had a big crash during the race, don't you remember?” he asked softly.

You shake your head slowly, wincing again. Images flash in your mind — the roar of the engine, the blur of the track, the sickening impact...

“The car... The rain... I... I lost control” you whisper.

Tears well up in your eyes, the memory of the crash is terrifyingly vivid. Charles takes your hand in his, his grip strong and reassuring.

“It's okay love, you're okay now. That's all that matters.” he whispers.

He squeezes your hand gently, a silent promise hanging between you. The ordeal is far from over, but for now, the simple act of holding hands speaks volumes. You've survived the crash, and with Charles by your side, you'll face whatever comes next, together. You manage a weak smile at him, the sound of his voice a grounding presence. However, the celebration is short-lived. A dull ache throbs behind your eyes, intensifying with each passing second. You squeeze your temples shut, trying to push the pain back.

“Hey, what's wrong?” he asks, noticing your discomfort.

You open your eyes, a grimace forming on your face. “My head... it feels like it's splitting open.”

The nurse step forward. “That's normal after a head injury, dear. We gave you some pain medication earlier, but it might be wearing off... Let me check your vitals again, okay?”

The nurse bustles around you, taking your temperature and blood pressure. Charles doesn't take his eyes off you, his concern evident.

“Is it serious? Should they give you more medicine?” Charles asked.

“Let's see how she's doing first... Y/n, can you turn your head for me, please? Slowly, to the left and then the right.”

You try as instructed, but a searing pain shoots through your neck, making you flinch and cry out. Tears well up in your eyes again, a mix of frustration and fear.

”See? She can't even move her neck! There's something wrong!” Charles says quite alarmed and almost furious.

“It's alright, Charles. It's likely just muscle stiffness from the impact. We can give her some medication and a neck brace for support.” The nurse says calmly.

“Will I ever be able to race again?” you say a little worried with a trembling voice.

The question hangs heavy in the air, Charles reaches out and strokes your cheek gently. ”Don't worry about racing right now, you need to focus on getting better. We'll figure out the rest later.”

His voice is firm, but his eyes hold a flicker of worry. He knows how much racing means to you... For both of you it is the most important thing in your lives, but now that is in the background.

”Exactly... Right now, rest is the most important thing. We'll get you the medication you need, and we'll monitor your progress closely.” The nurse says as she looks for medicine and the neck brace.

The nurse injects a new pain medication into your IV. The relief is slow, but it gradually takes the edge off the throbbing in your head. The nurse places the neck brace on you, although it needs to be tight, as this prevents neck mobility. You lean back against the pillows, exhaustion washing over you.

“Get some sleep, love. You'll feel better I promise.” he smiles weakly.

You nod weakly, your eyelids drooping. Despite the pain and uncertainty, a sliver of hope flickers within you. You're surrounded by love and support, and that makes all the difference.

As you drift off to sleep, you hear Charles whisper a promise in your ear.

“Everything will be okay baby, I promise... Just stay here with me, okay?” He says and you give a slight thumbs up, you feel your whole body weak and destroyed.

The road to recovery will be long and arduous, but with Charles by your side, you know you can face it head-on, even with a throbbing head and a stiff neck.

The fear of not racing again persists in you, but obviously it is not something you can control, Besides, you don't know exactly if you will spend months off the track. What you do know with great certainty is that you have Charles' constant support and that is enough for you.

[verstappenf1lecccc]

hiya could you write something with Charles x reader where they get into a fight and he then gives her the silent treatment for a few days she tried to talk to him but he blanks her, she eventually cracks a few days later cause she thinks he doesn’t love her anymore and gets really upset infronto of him. But they do make up in the end make it angsty but with lots of fluff and makeup..

Invisible

thank you for this ask!! I love for angst hope you like this first part!!

3,797 Characters 693 Words 🎀

"Prick," the word flew so fast out of your mouth, it almost made you take a double take. You've never been one for profanities; your mother once heard a loud "fuck" come out of your lips and had soaped the hell out of your mouth. So when you did curse, Charles knew it was serious. It had been a week after Charles had revealed that he had decided to renew his contract with the Scuderia, safe to say, you were disappointed.

You've spent the entire winter break trying to convince Charles to move to Red Bull; this didn’t come out of thin air, it came out of Horner offering Charles a seat for the next season, to which Charles had hurriedly said, "I’ll think about it." As his wife, you really were concerned for his well-being and career. The Scuderia was not where it should be or where it was with the likes of Kimi or Michael. You just wanted Charles to have the opportunity to display his true talent. Especially after hearing Fred calling him a "washed-out nepo baby," your blood was boiling since you've heard that. Being with Charles was something you'd never thought you'd be capable of, but with years of convincing and efforts made by him, you couldn’t hold back and fell deeply and madly in love with him.

This was what ignited the first major fight in your relationship. A simple comment that you had made had pissed Charles off; he couldn’t understand why his wife, of all people did not get why he wanted to stay with Ferrari. It was more than a job for him; it was his whole existence.

He wanted to win a championship with Ferrari for Herve and for Jules more than anything. Your comment on how you thought his goal was unachievable with the team made him wonder if you doubted his moves and, most importantly, doubted him. Charles was never a yeller; he was always silent whenever you both had disagreements, always making sure you got your point across before he started. He was never a bad communicator, always making sure he didn’t make you feel less than or below him. But the Charles in this argument was not like the perfect husband he prides himself in being. This Charles was a proper prick, probably the worst he’s ever been.  You knew you had done something to upset him; you could tell from how fast he drove the car, how white his knuckles were, how he didn’t even spare you a glance as you got in the car, how he didn’t remind you to wear your seatbelt, and most importantly, how sharply his jaw was clenching.  You knew you were in for a huge fight; you were just wondering what you had said or done to make him this pissed.  The car rolled to a halt; Charles had just uttered his first words of the night, "go up", no mon angel, no love at the end of his sentence, just blunt words filled with bitter emotion.  You hurried up the stairs, almost tripping over your dress, the dress you wore for him.  When Charles finally entered the bedroom, he failed to notice your slightly shaking figure or your red eyes; all he saw when he saw you was failure.  He’d walked right past you, almost as if you were a wall; he knew what he was doing, he knew that you hated arguments but hated the silent treatment even more, it reminded you of your childhood and of never knowing what you were doing wrong to upset your mother.  That night the bed felt cold, even though you both were sleeping in it, the bed lacked the cuddles and warmth that emitted from the kisses you both often shared. It felt wrong; you tried to move towards your husband but you felt him move away, that was all it took for you to softly cry into your pillow.  You felt like your whole marriage was crumbling right before your eyes and you could do nothing to fix it. All because your husband had decided that you were invisible.

[urhoneycombwitch]

sweet.

Steve x reader smut, 1.3k

foreword: u know that scene from Euphoria where Elliot makes out with Jules’ hand as if it was her pussy… anyways Steve Harrington take it away!!! 🎤 (dedicated to 🦊 anon thank u for your wisdom)

___

Sure, the drinking and the dancing is a good way to pass the time, but you’re partial to the end-of-night rituals you and Steve have settled into over the years. Your personal afterparty usually involves a shitty romcom, occasionally some weed, and always snacks both sweet and salty to soak up the alcohol.

Steve’s parents are out of town again, so the two of you are down in the basement den, passing a joint between fingers sticky with candy film.

From all your years of reading Steve’s body language you can tell he’s pretty high- feet planted on the ground but head lolling against the back of the couch, hands lax at his sides. There’s a dopey grin on his face- practically primed for a shitty joke or annoying comment- and you let the smoke out with a huff, asking on the exhale, “What?”

“You owe me five bucks.” Steve presses the side of his head into the couch, looking at you with red-rimmed eyes, still smiling.

You scoff, leaning in to pass the joint back and swiping a handful of gummy bears from the coffee table while you’re at it. “Since fucking when?”

“Since I bought this from Eddie.” Steve waves the weed for emphasis before taking another hit, smoke curling from his nostrils. “You’re matching me in pace, princess. This joint was ten bucks- ergo, you owe me five.”

You cackle despite yourself- “Ergo? You’ve been watching too many Perry Mason reruns.” You know Steve’s not actually gonna make you pay for the weed, he’s just trying to rile you up, and the fact that it’s not working is getting under his skin.

He shrugs a shoulder, just shy of pouting. “Point still stands.”

“Well, you shoulda let me buy from him. Eddie always gives me discounts. On account of these.” Here, you straighten your spine and gesture to your chest- after all the night’s activity, your boobs are practically spilling out of your bra and t-shirt combo, skin glowing in the muted TV’s light.

Steve blinks, clears his throat, and busies himself by ashing the joint into a spare candy wrapper. “Uh huh. Right. I’ll be sure to remember your tits the next time I’m talking to Munson.”

“At least someone will be thinking of them.” You mean it as a joke, but your voice is a bit too mournful to be taken lightly.

“Ah, and you’ve been picking such winners, recently,” Steve intones, dryly. The pillow launched at his head in your poor attempt to hit him is easily batted away. “C’mon, sweetheart. You’ve been going out with total losers. Aaron Conroy? Jamie Porter? Wouldn’t trust either of those guys to find their own dicks. Let alone your whole… business.”

Steve’s aborted gesture to the general area of your jeans makes you guffaw. “Oh, and you’re the reigning expert on girls’ business?”

“Sure am. King Steve, after all.” Said king juts an overeager thumb into his chest, winces, then gives his hand a little shake.

“Mmhm.” You slide across the couch cushions to take the joint again, knee knocking into Steve’s. “I’m pretty good at it too, y’know.”

Steve stares with wide eyes as you suck smoke into your lungs, blinking owlishly before stuttering- “You- you’re saying you’re pretty good at eating pu- at eating girls out?”

Another cackle looses from your chest along with the smoke, you can’t help it- Steve looks so properly shocked. “No, Steve, obviously I meant sucking dick. Not that I’d be opposed, per se, to a girl’s… business.”

The word drips in irony and Steve scrubs a hand down his face in irritation as you settle against the couch next to him, brushing shoulders as you continue. “Just aren’t enough girls in Hawkins to go for. Who are both out and not my friends,” you amend, before Robin can be dragged into the conversation against her will.

“You wouldn’t go down on a friend?” Steve fidgets a strip of paper Clark Bar wrapper between his fingers, crinkling quietly while he waits for your answer.

The weed has settled in your system now, a haze in your veins as you stub the roach out and leave it on the coffee table. You settle back into the couch, suddenly aware of every point of contact- thigh to thigh, arm to arm, shoulder to shoulder with Steve, who’s seemingly paused his breathing.

“Uhm. Yeah. I’d sleep with a friend,” you say, staring at your lap, empty hands twisting around themselves.

The tension of the moment swells, you can feel it in your chest, even as Steve draws in a breath to muse, “Wonder who’s better at it.”

“Eating girls out?” You look at him to confirm, feeling a pang when you see the lock of chestnut hair that’s flopped from its place to rest against his forehead. “I mean… probably you. Seeing as you’ve got the most experience.”

Steve smiles, lazily, tipping his head in acknowledgement, then says, “I could teach you. If you wanted.”

If Steve feels the way you stiffen in response to his words he doesn’t point it out, instead tossing the wrapper aside in favor of taking your hand into his. “Only if you wanted, though.”

You start nodding before the words can come; a shaky “Okay,” and Steve’s wrapping two warm palms around your right hand, manipulating your fingers into making a fist.

“I like to start with kissing,” he says, voice low, gaze fixed on your combined hands. “Y’know. To work her up, get her wet.”

It’s not even technically dirty talk, but the pitch of Steve’s words make your thighs clench involuntarily, seeking friction. Steve brings your hand to his mouth, pressing a kiss to the base of your thumb, and your breath hitches.

“And then I… usually…” Steve trails off, and you can see the gears turning in his head at how best to teach. Apparently, he pegs you for a hands-on learner, because instead of words, he dips down to lick a stripe up the flat of your thumb.

Your mouth falls open as Steve licks deftly into the crease made by your thumb and index finger, curling the point of his tongue near the base again, your clit throbbing in response as if he was actually between your legs.

Steve makes out with your hand for what feels like hours, all sense of time warped by the heady weed. His mouth is warm and wet, saliva dripping through to your palm as he holds you in place despite your squirming.

What’s really turning you on is how into this Steve appears to be- his eyes are closed as if to savor the moment, brow pinched with pleasure, little noises from the back of his throat sending vibrations down your arm.

You fight the urge to sink your free hand into those silky brown locks; instead, your nails bite into soft skin as you clench a fist at your side, willing the subtle movement of your hips with each stroke of Steve’s tongue to stay subtle.

There’s an obscene squelching noise filling the otherwise quiet basement, and this seems to spur Steve on, suckling at your sensitive skin, heat coursing through your body as you gasp out, “Steve…”

He pulls off your hand with a wet pop, a string of saliva still connecting you both, his mouth a glistening half-moon in the low light before he swipes the back of his hand across it. “So. Yeah. Something like that. You taste good, by the way. Sweet.”

You fight with the hinge of your lower jaw to put it back in its place, breathing heavily as you wipe your slick-coated hand against the leg of your jeans. It leaves a wet patch- likely not the only one, if the heartbeat between your legs is any indication. “Probably the gummy bears.”

“Uh huh. You think you’re any better?” Steve’s got that easy grin back on his face, cheeks rosy, lips flushed with color, too.

A quick glance down confirms that he’s hard as a rock, sizeable outline of his cock visible through the denim, betraying the bravado in his stance.

Oh, you’re gonna wreck him.

With an easy grin of your own, you reach for Steve’s hand. “Dunno. Wanna find out?”

[steddieas-shegoes]

On school picture day, Steve always gets the kids ready. It’s not that Eddie doesn’t want to, it’s that he kind of hates making them dress up for a photo when 99% of the time, they’re just kids.

Except Steve had to go to a training conference for guidance counselors this week and picture day is happening whether they like it or not.

Their oldest, Jules, can do everything herself now. Prefers it, actually. She’s been extremely independent since she turned 10 a few months ago and neither of them try to stop her.

But their twins are only six, and James and Connor are like tornadoes who interrupted a category five hurricane and wore their most stained clothes while doing it.

“Let’s at least brush your hair,” Eddie suggested, already mentally preparing for the arguments that would cause. “Just for the picture and then you can mess it up however you want.”

“But daddy lets us wear it crazy!” Connor lies.

“And he lets us take off our shirts!” James lied even more.

“You guys don’t even know how to lie right,” Jules said as she finished braiding her own hair.

“We don’t lie!” They said in unison.

Eddie used to think the twins talking and doing things at the same time was just coincidence, but now he knows it has to be some kind of evolutionary benefit to outsmart the parents.

“Let’s call daddy then and ask,” Eddie said, immediately being met with silence. “Oh, can we not? If he lets you do that stuff, then it shouldn’t be a problem right?”

The twins shake their heads.

“Great!” Eddie pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and pretends to dial Steve. Steve’s not gonna answer, so he just sends a quick text to let him know it’s fine and to let it ring to voicemail. He holds the phone up to his ear as it rings twice and then goes to voicemail. “Hey sweetheart. You know how it’s picture day? Mhm. Well the twins told me you usually let them just go without brushing their hair or even wearing a shirt! I thought that sounded silly. So you don’t?”

“Wait! Okay we lied a little!” Connor yelled, suddenly panicking at being caught.

“And maybe a lot!” James added, already trying to climb Eddie’s side so he could reach for the phone.

“I’ll go get them ready, love you, bye!” Eddie rushed out and hung up so he could hold James safely. “I think you think I’m a fool.”

“No dad, you just let us be crazy,” James said.

“So does your daddy. Just not on picture day. You know the rules. We do this for him, right? We get nice and handsome and we smile for the camera so we can hang the pictures on the fridge.” Eddie glanced at last year’s school photos, resisting the urge to cry at how big they’d all gotten so quickly. James was missing three teeth now, Connor seemingly lost a ton of his baby fat early, and Jules had started wearing earrings. “He likes seeing your faces on the fridge.”

“But can’t we just wear our regular clothes?” Connor begged from his other side.

Eddie looked down at what they were wearing. It wasn’t that bad. No stains, at least. And no holes. That was rare for them.

“You can wear these clothes if you let me make your hair look nice,” Eddie bargained.

“Daddy’s gonna kill you,” Jules said with her arms crossed.

“He loves me too much. Plus who else would do the dishes every night? He can’t kill me!” Eddie joked, tickling James before setting him down on the floor. “To the bathroom, my princes! Make haste!”

They ran for the bathroom quickly, nearly tripping over each other in the process.

Eddie’s phone vibrated in his hand with a text from Steve that just said ‘if they don’t brush their hair for pictures, Santa won’t come.’

Eddie texted back quickly: so cruel. as his most sexiest elf, I wouldn’t pass over their house.

Steve sent a ‘🙄’ and then a ‘😘’.

Eddie pocketed his phone and went to help the boys with their hair.

When they got the pictures back a month later, Steve shook his head, but couldn’t quite hide the fond smile.

James and Connor both forgot to give normal smiles into the camera.

But their hair looked almost perfect.

[ginnsbaker]

fic: if i bleed (you'll be the last to know) (2/?)

Part summary: Leigh goes on a double date with Jules. You reach a tipping point with Leigh's relentless hostility towards you.

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Fem!Reader | Word count for this part: 5,072 | Warnings/Tags: None for now... smut eventually, enemies to lovers A/N: So... this turned into more than a two-shot. But it will still be a mini-series. It's also kinda slow burn for a mini series (lol). Also, this isn't canon compliant at all. Meaning, I took a lot of liberties and added stuff to Leigh and Matt's relationship, and it doesn't follow the timeline of the show. With that said, enjoy!

Masterlist | Part I | Next Part

-

The vet bills hit Leigh's bank account way harder than she’s willing to admit. 

She knew taking care of pets could get pricey, but she thought that was just for those on their last leg, like Matt's dog, Rogue. Facing those steep costs made her think twice about turning down Drew's offer a while back to bring back her advice column. So, she calls him up as soon as she pays up a quarter of the charges on her credit card for Visitor's medical expenses.

Drew answers on the second ring. “Hey Leigh, what's up?”

Leigh doesn’t beat around the bush. She never has to with her best friend. “Can we meet at the cafe? I need to talk to you about something.”

“Sure. Be there in 20,” Drew replies right away.

The coffee shop they frequent is a small local business that specializes in cold brews. Leigh’s favorite thing about it is not the coffee though, but its interior: mismatched chairs, bookshelves lining the wall, and the temperature that’s always just right. Leigh arrives first, securing their favorite table near the window. Drew walks in a few minutes later, coffee already in hand, and greets her with a warm smile.

“Okay, spill. What's going on?” Drew asks as he takes a seat.

“I've been thinking... about the column. I was wrong to turn it down. I want back in.”

The look of utter surprise on his face tells Leigh this was the last thing he expected. She senses his response won't be a straightforward yes.

“I'd be thrilled to have you back, Leigh, I really would—”

“But?” Leigh cuts in. She doesn’t need to hear a bullshit ‘it’s not you, it’s me’ excuse. She wishes Drew would just be as direct with her as she is with him.

Drew lets out a sigh. Under different circumstances, saying no to Leigh would be as easy as declining an upsell from a McDonald's cashier. However, ever since Leigh became a widow, rejecting her feels significantly harder, even though he's well aware that Leigh values honesty over pity.

“But the thing is, the new writer’s really hitting it off with our audience. She's had a string of articles go viral lately.”

Leigh doesn’t look at all impressed by that. “Yeah, I heard.”

Personally, Drew’s not a fan of the new writer's style, and honestly, he still prefers Leigh. It would just be a hard sell if he brought this up to management. As the saying goes: if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

“Look, I still think you have a unique voice. You know I’d still take advice from you over the new girl.”

Leigh scoffs a little at that, shaking her head. Drew rolls his eyes; it’s typical of Leigh to never know how to take a compliment. He continues, “How would you feel about guest writing? Maybe for the first couple of weeks, we could find a way to incorporate your insights into a series or a special feature.”

It’s not what she hoped for, but she recognizes the olive branch for what it is.

And she’ll take it. 

“I... yeah, I think that could work, Drew. I've got a ton of new ideas, and this... this could be great,” Leigh says. “Uhm, thanks.”

Drew grins. “I thought you'd like that. Let's kick off with a couple of guest pieces, see how it goes.”

Leigh half-heartedly returns his enthusiasm just as her order of cheeseburger and affogato are served.

“Anything new with you?” Drew asks, his voice taking on that tone he reserves for the really good gossip. Knowing Drew's helping her out, Leigh figures a little life update wouldn't hurt as a form of thanks.

That update is about you. And the moment Leigh spills the beans, Drew's face lights up like a Christmas tree. But his excitement fizzles out just as fast when he figures out Leigh's got nothing scandalous to say. All she mentions is how you might've missed the mark by not doing your homework on the guy you were seeing.

“What’s your plan then?”

“Seems like everyone’s asking me that,” Leigh says flatly.

“You took your stray to her place, right? So, there must be some sort of plan. I mean, you could've gone to any other vet if you wanted to avoid her.”

“Yeah, but her clinic's location is so convenient, and I didn't want to shrink my world just for her.”

Drew hums in response. Leigh admits she’s been unusually passive with you. Normally, she'd confront issues head-on, but even almost half a year later, she still hasn’t fully processed Matt’s death, let alone his cheating. She's been trying a new tactic, almost as if by ignoring her problems, she hopes they'll fade away on their own. She seems to be betting on the idea that if she pretends long enough, maybe one day she'll wake up and find those issues have lost their grip on her. 

“I don’t know Leigh, the whole thing’s weird,” Drew says, scrunching up his face a bit.

“It’s not like I’m trying to make a friend or enemy out of her,” Leigh replies with a shrug. “I’m just using her services as a doctor, and she’s getting paid for it. That’s all there is to it.”

“Oh, so that’s why you need your old job back. She’s draining your purse,” he says, smirking as he adds, “Bitch.”

“You don’t have to call her that,” Leigh chides, though the corner of her mouth twitches in amusement. Deep down, she understands the twisted satisfaction in disliking someone without having to justify it.

“The funniest thing that can happen is if you two actually end up being friends,” Drew quips, picking up an accidental curly from Leigh’s plate.

Leigh finds that scenario hard to imagine, almost impossible. She doesn’t think she can be friends with someone Matt liked more than her.

-

Leigh is hunched over her laptop, with sheets of paper and colorful markers spread out on the table, meticulously designing missing dog posters for Visitor.

Jules, leaning against the doorframe with a mug of coffee in hand, watches Leigh for a moment before speaking up. “You know, you should've done that the second you decided to take Visitor in.”

Leigh doesn't look up from her screen. “His leg needed to be taken care of first,” she reasons.

Jules rolls her eyes, pushing off from the doorframe to come closer. “And? How did it go at the clinic?”

Leigh pauses, then lets out an exaggerated sigh. “I already told you about the tests Visitor had to go through. They said he’ll be fine.”

“I mean with the doctor, not the patient,” Jules clarifies with a smirk.

There's a beat of silence before Leigh quips, “No cat fights happened, I promise,” her eyes going back to her laptop.

“Any chance she knocked off a bit of the bill?” Jules asks, moving to sit behind Leigh to take a peek of her work. It looks like an 8th grader’s art project, but she bites back any criticisms.

“Nope.”

“Told you she’s a bitch,” Jules murmurs under her breath.

“It's not like anyone's doing charity work these days, especially not in this economy,” Leigh argues weakly.

“Yeah, right. Like she needs your money, Leigh. Veterinarians are loaded, if you didn’t know.”

“If you say so.”

Jules decides to drop the subject, and Leigh can hear her shuffling and thinking behind her.  

“Hey, there's something I've been wanting to ask you. Don't get mad, okay?”

“Prefacing like that? I'm bracing myself to be utterly scandalized,” Leigh says before smiling and sneaking a glance at Jules.

“Great, you’re cracking jokes again. That’s a good sign,” Jules deadpans but a second later, she’s smiling too. 

“Ask away,” Leigh prods.

Jules takes a deep breath, and then:

“Do you think you’re ready to meet someone new?”

Leigh suddenly stops, her fingers just hanging there above the keyboard, unsure of what to do next. What’s the protocol here? If three months is usually the cooling period after a break-up before one can start dating other people, then what's the deal when it's about a husband who's not only passed away but was also cheating? How does that work?

Before Leigh can come up with an answer, she realizes she's already saying no.

Jules groans. “Come on, it's just a double date. It'll be fun. You and me and—”

“I’m really not in the mood to meet other people, Jules.”

Jules cuts in, laying it on thick. “Leigh, seriously, when was the last time you went out and had a little fun? You're practically turning into a recluse. I won't stand by and watch my sister morph into the neighborhood's infamous dog lady.”

“Dog lady? Really?”

“I'm just saying, it's either try something new or start knitting dog sweaters for fun. Your choice.”

Jules can be a real pest sometimes; it’s an endearing quality except when they seem ready to go for each other's throats.

“You think you’re hilarious, don’t you?” Leigh rests her chin on her hand, seriously considering the invitation for a second. “I don’t know how to meet people, Jules. I stopped meeting people when I met Matt. He was my entire world, you know?”

Jules softens, throwing her arms around Leigh’s shoulders. “I know. And I wouldn't push if I didn't think it could be good for you. Plus, I promise, if it's awful, I'll personally escort you out and we can ditch them for ice cream. How's that?”

Leigh senses that Jules won't give up until she gets a yes, so she decides to concede just this time and get it over with.

“Okay, okay, you win. I'll go on your stupid double date. But if this ends in disaster, you're buying me the biggest tub of ice cream you can find,” Leigh says, shrugging her sister off her.

Jules pumps her fist in victory. “Deal! You won't regret this, Leigh. And who knows? It might actually be fun.”

-

The double date goes surprisingly smoothly, except for the occasional touches coming from her date. To be fair, they are typical for a date and are executed with respect. However, for some reason, Leigh finds herself unusually conscious of every physical contact, making her anxious to move things along and call it a night.

As they step out of the restaurant, Leigh mentally scrambles to remember her date's name. She's bracing for the goodbyes, ready to retreat into the comfort of her room, when Tommy, Jules' girlfriend, suggests they cap the night off at a new bar. It turns out Leigh's date has an investment in the place. He jumps at the suggestion, clearly eager to flaunt this detail, perhaps hoping to impress her.

He does earn a sincere, “That’s cool,” from Leigh, just before she slides into the backseat of his car. Tommy quickly calls dibs on the front seat, leaving the siblings sitting next to each other in the back.

The new bar clearly wants to be the town’s next hotspot, but it seems to be trying too hard. It's got this odd vibe where you're not sure if you should be dancing or just looking around, wondering what it really wants you to do. But Leigh agreed to this, and she won’t embarrass Jules by ditching. 

“Can I get you something to drink?”

She stiffens a bit as he draws near, the heat of Patrick's breath—Jules had reminded her of his name during the car ride—making her uncomfortably aware of how close he is. She shifts, trying to put a polite distance between them without seeming too obvious about it. “Um, just a gin and tonic, please,” she says.

She practically sighs in relief as Patrick heads off to order, her eyes darting around the bar. The 90s R&B background gets her head bopping, but all she’s thinking about is her couch and an episode of Parks and Recreation waiting for her at home. Jules and Tommy are in their own little world, giggling and looking all cozy. Leigh never thought she could feel like a third wheel on a double date.

Patrick is taking his time, and when Leigh cranes her neck to peer over the bar, she catches him striking up a conversation with a blonde. Her eyes narrow into slits as she watches, both of them obviously charmed by the other as Patrick laughs at something she said, enjoying himself in a way he hadn’t all night. 

Leigh feels a prick of irritation. Sure, she hasn’t been giving him the time of his life, but they’re still on a date. Isn’t there some unwritten rule about not flirting with other people when you're supposed to be with someone?

She waits a bit longer, hoping Patrick would remember he was supposed to be getting her a drink and come back. However, he hasn't moved an inch from his spot and is even passing Leigh's drink to the woman as they keep chatting. Leigh’s mind races. She knows she isn’t into Patrick, has been giving him nothing but the bare minimum, yet she can't shake off the feeling of being slighted. It's not like she wanted his undivided attention, but this... this just seems rude.

She catches Jules looking at her, a questioning eyebrow raised. Leigh just shrugs, not sure how to explain the jumble of feelings she's experiencing without sounding petty or jealous. 

When Patrick finally comes back with her drink, the mood has already turned sour for Leigh. She musters a polite smile, accepts the gin and tonic with a thank you, but then heads to the bar on her own without saying anything more. At this point, she's indifferent to what Patrick, Tommy, or Jules might think or say of her; she's finished playing nice for the day. 

Leigh slams her gin and tonic like it's water, the sting barely registering. She signals for another without missing a beat and strangers start sliding over drinks with cheeky grins. She toasts to nothing, to no one, letting the conversations slip away before they can get even one word out.

By drink number six—or was it seven?—everything's spinning, laughter too loud, lights too bright. Leigh’s clinging to the bar for dear life when she thinks she sees you. But as quickly as the figure appears, it's lost again, leaving her questioning her ability to handle her alcohol. Back in her college days, Leigh could hold her liquor like a champ, thanks to endless nights of partying. But now, staring down at her drink, she realizes she might've overestimated her current tolerance. The alcohol hits harder than she remembers, making her head swim more than she'd like to admit. It's been a while since she's gone this hard, and her body isn't shy about reminding her.

The worst part of it though is why, of all the faces her mind could conjure up, it's choosing yours.

Just as she tries to shake off the bizarre vision, your face appears again, this time on the dance floor, writhing in a sea of thick, sweating bodies. You're dancing closely with a man, and it’s—

It’s Matt. 

Leigh blinks rapidly, attempting to dispel the hallucination because it's impossible; Matt is dead—this can't be real. 

But the image of you and Matt refuses to go away. She continues to see the way your grind against him, the way you caress his face as you pull it further into your neck. Anger surges through her, hot and uncontrollable, and before she knows it, her last shot of tequila crashes to the floor. Before the bartender or anyone else can even figure out what's happening, Leigh storms through the crowd, pushing her way to what she believes is you and her husband, and shoves the couple hard. The moment she does it, the fog in her brain finally clears.

She saw wrong. They’re just a random couple, looking as shocked as she feels mortified.

Humiliated and more drunk than she's willing to admit, Leigh doesn't stick around to apologize. Tears start to well up as she pushes through the crowd, dodging empty faces while Jules' calls fade into the background. She shoves through the last of the mob, bursts through the doors into the night, and freedom feels just a breath away. But that breath catches, twists into a violent churn in her gut, and she can barely stagger a few desperate steps away from the entrance before her knees are on the cold pavement, and she’s spilling out onto the ground in front of her. A few groans of disgusts from the people around her doesn’t register as she succumbs to the consequences of her indulgence. Shortly after, she remembers why she’s cut back on alcohol, apart from the fact that Matt abhors it, turns him off more than anything.

“Leigh?”

The voice is familiar, even if she’s heard it only a few times. Her head's spinning as she looks up, the chilly air slapping her face after the stuffiness of the club. She blinks, trying to clear the blur of tears and the aftereffects of one too many drinks, squinting at the figure stepping out from under the streetlights.

Your face, more clearly now under the lamp post is kind of sobering her up a bit.

So, were you actually there in the club, or is Leigh so haunted by thoughts of you and Matt—thoughts she's tried so hard to ignore and bury—that she managed to conjure you as a way to finally confront her true feelings about the entire situation? It’s always the battles with herself she never wins.

“Hey, you alright?” you ask, lowering yourself to get a better look at her but keeping back a bit—just enough space for her to catch her breath or in case she needs to throw up again.

Leigh doesn't respond, doesn't even seem to see you're there. You rummage through your crossbody bag, pulling out some wet wipes and offering them to her. She still doesn't look up, but grabs what you’re offering with a little force. 

She proceeds to wipe her mouth and then her entire face as you continue talking, words tumbling out in a nervous stream.

“I saw you back there, in the club. I wasn't sure if I should come up to you, you know, with everything that's happened... with me being... well, the person I am in all of this,” you explain softly. “And then I saw what happened, how upset you got. Sorry I followed you here, I…I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

Leigh abruptly gets to her feet, and you instinctively step back, giving her more room than probably needed.

“Why?” Leigh fires at you, her tone so icy it almost makes you regret coming after her. You're taken aback, eyebrows scrunching up in confusion. 

Why what?

“Why do you even care?” she clarifies, eyeing you as if you're the densest person on the planet.

You grasp for something, anything that sounds like you're not just here out of guilt. “Anyone who knows you would be worried,” you say before you can think twice about what it could mean.

Leigh's laugh is sharp, cutting. “You don't know me,” she throws back.

“Yeah, I don’t,” you mumble to yourself. You wish you did, so you could fix this.

Leigh’s anger doesn’t let up. “You know what I think? You're playing the good Samaritan to scrub off your guilt. But not knowing Matt was married? That's on you. I bet you never asked too many questions because you wanted him to be Mr. Perfect—single, ready to mingle, the dream guy.”

Opening your mouth to argue, you find yourself at a loss. Leigh’s not entirely wrong. With Matt, you were in a bubble, caught up in the thrill of meeting someone who seemed so right, so honest. You clung to his every word, wanting to believe in this image of him you'd built up. 

The truth is, you never wanted to meet Leigh Shaw; you wanted to believe Matt's only fault was how he ended things with you, by disappearing.

But before you can admit to all of that, Leigh is already storming off. You think about chasing after her, but she spins around so fast at your footsteps, shooting you a threatening look and a low, “Stop following me,” that nails you to the ground. 

You keep staring at the spot she disappeared from, long after she's gone, wondering why Matt felt the need to find love elsewhere.

-

Leigh goes home, but not to an empty house. The second she opens the door, Visitor bounds into her arms, full of wiggles and wet nose kisses. Her mom's off somewhere, doing who knows what—Leigh's stopped trying to figure out where or why. Meanwhile, her phone buzzes with a string of voicemails from Jules, but Leigh's not in the mood to dive into those just yet. She decides they can wait till morning, along with the other missed calls and unread messages from strangers, asking for more information on Visitor.

For now, she peels off her socks and pants, leaving them scattered carelessly up the stairs before passing out on her bed.

-

Visitor’s follow-up check-up rolls around way too quickly for comfort. The moment Leigh steps through the clinic door with the dog in tow, you can practically cut the tension with a knife. Leigh's trying to keep it together, but her attempts at civility are imbued with a coldness that can’t be ignored.

With only a small ‘good morning’ from you and a nod from Leigh, you start the consultation, knowing you’d be doing her a favor if you just get right to it.

“How's Visitor been eating?” you ask as you work your stethoscope. 

“He eats fine,” Leigh drawls.

You nod, jotting down a note before moving on, “And his activity levels? Any changes there?”

Leigh’s response comes laced with sarcasm. 

“Oh, he's just peachy. Running marathons every morning.”

You clear your throat, trying to rein in your mounting annoyance at her childish behavior. “I'm just trying to get a complete picture,” you say.

But Leigh's not having any of it. Her comments grow sharper, her patience thinning, and it's clear she's more interested in taking jabs at you than discussing her dog's health.

Her last sarcastic remark has you drawing the line. “Leigh, you can be upset with me all you want outside of this clinic, but I won't tolerate disrespect while I'm trying to do my job,” you say evenly. “You're welcome to find another vet if you can't keep this professional. I have every right to refuse service if this continues. It's not what I want, but I'm not about to let you treat me any less professionally.”

Leigh goes quiet, yet she keeps her eyes locked on yours, decidedly not backing down. Then, after a tense moment, she mutters a single word, “Sorry.” It's not much, but it's something, and you decide to take it and move on.

“You mentioned something about a blood sample?” Leigh says, steering the conversation back to the reason she came in, and you're all for following her lead on this.

“Yeah, we need to check if his platelets are up and his infections are down, see if the meds are doing their job,” you explain. Then, veering a bit from standard procedure, you add, “Since this is a follow-up visit, I'm going to cut the lab test price in half for you.”

The discount evidently lifts her mood. It's not a perfect truce, but it's enough to get through the examination without any more barbs.

A while later, you're back with Visitor's CBC results in hand. “The infection's gone down, but it's still borderline,” you report, showing her the numbers. “We'll need to keep him on the medication for another week. And I'm adding some multivitamins and a specific diet to his regimen.” 

You scribble down the details, then note at the bottom of the pad about the discount—not just for the lab test, but for the prescriptions too.

Leigh takes the paper, scanning the details before her eyes finally meet yours. “Thank you,” she says, her voice softer than it's been.

“You’re welcome,” you reply with a smile before going back to your notebook, looking deep in thought. 

Leigh feels like you're back to your usual, friendly self. Yet she thinks she prefers the more raw, unfiltered version of you. The version that called her out earlier. These days, she's starving for that kind of honesty. Because having her as your client can’t be all that pleasurable. She's aware of how challenging she's been, and the straightforwardness somehow makes her feel more understood, more seen.

She wishes people would stop seeing her as Leigh: the one with the dead husband.

Then, out of nowhere, she asks, “When did you start working here?”

It's a seemingly insignificant question, yet coming from Leigh, it prompts you to close your notebook and focus entirely on her.

“I—”

“Because a year ago, I remember meeting a different doctor,” Leigh adds, absentmindedly running her fingers through Visitor’s coarse hair as he sleeps on her lap.

“You’ve been here before?”

It’s a painful memory—one that still sometimes brings tears to her eyes whenever it crosses her mind. Back then, the clinic bore a different name, and she and Matt had come together to say goodbye to Rogue.

“I have when it was still called Palm Coast,” she says.

You nod, understanding the context now. “Yeah, that was before my time. I bought this clinic on a whim after spending a few years practicing in Dubai.”

While most would latch onto the tidbit about your intriguing career history, Leigh zeros in on something else entirely, asking directly, “When did Matt start coming here?”

You shift uncomfortably at her question, and Leigh immediately regrets pushing too hard. She’s about to backtrack when you halt her apologies. “It’s okay. I’m open to talking about it, just not here,” you suggest. “How about over coffee?”

Leigh hesitates, then says, “Okay, let me just text my boss that I won't be able to lead the yoga class this morning.”

“It doesn’t have to be now. Tomorrow works,” you say.

Realizing her assumption, Leigh’s cheeks color slightly. “What time?”

Now it's your turn to feel a bit awkward. “Would 7 work? It's the only time I have before the clinic opens.”

“In the morning?” Leigh says again, making sure she heard you right.

You nod sheepishly in reply. 

“Or we could maybe—”

“No, it's okay,” Leigh interrupts quickly. She's usually up before sunrise anyway; the only change would be trimming her morning run a bit. And for a one-time chat to get the answers she's after, she figures she can make such a small sacrifice.

–

“Are you sure you want to return Visitor to his real family?”

True to form, it's Jules who breaks the two-day-long sibling spat. It's usually her who tries to smooth things over with an apology, even on days when Leigh isn't exactly the easiest person to deal with. Her therapist keeps telling her not to always be the one to buckle, especially when she's the one who's been hurt, that Leigh should be the one to step up and make things right for a change. 

But here she is, reaching out first, just like always—because waiting for Leigh to make the first move feels like waiting for snow in July.

“Oh, so you’re talking to me again?” Leigh says as if she's gearing up for another round of conflict rather than welcoming peace.

Jules ignores her and continues, “Have you actually tried to find Visitor's owners, or have you just kinda... kept him because it feels good to have him around?”

“So what if it feels good to have a dog who loves you and is loyal to you?”

Jules shakes her head in a condescending manner, which only serves to irritate Leigh further. As soon as her popcorn is done, she heads out of the kitchen, flops onto the couch, flips on the TV, and kicks her feet up on the coffee table. Jules follows her, opting to stand next to the TV, poised to yank the plug out if necessary.

“Leigh, you do understand that taking care of a dog isn't something to take lightly, right?” Jules starts, but she breaks off when the dog in question trots over, tail wagging, trying to coax Jules into picking him up.

Leigh acts like she hasn't heard a word, her eyes glued to the TV screen.

“I thought you'd learned something from what happened with Rogue—”

That hits a nerve. Leigh's quick to fire back, “Oh, and jumping into a serious relationship is super responsible, right? Especially when staying sober is part of the deal.”

Right after the words leave her mouth, Leigh regrets them deeply. She's painfully aware of Jules' long battle with alcoholism, a struggle that began in college and required more than a couple of tries before Jules could claim any sort of victory over her addiction. Leigh knows it's still a sore subject for Jules, still fighting her demons, making her comment unfairly harsh.

Though the retaliation didn’t come out of nowhere. Leigh caught Jules at the club, discreetly sipping a drink she swore off, and chose to keep quiet then to avoid causing a scene in front of Tommy. She had plans to bring it up later, but then her own slip-up with drinking, bailing on her date, and the fallout with Jules spiraled into one of their nastiest rows in a long while.

“Jules, I’m sorr—”

“Just save it, Leigh.”

Jules heads for the door, her hand clenched tight, barely hanging onto her emotions. Leigh feels the situation slipping further downhill, and she can't just stand back and watch things crumble even more. She's about to chase after Jules when the doorbell rings, stopping both of them cold.

But Jules doesn’t even bother with the door; instead, she veers off, storming upstairs with that telltale slam of her bedroom door echoing down. Leigh sighs, stuck in the aftermath, while Visitor starts barking at the door. Dragging her feet, Leigh heads over to open it, half-expecting another problem but hoping for a distraction.

Leigh definitely wasn't expecting Danny, and seeing him there, she gets the sinking feeling that this storm swirling around her isn’t going to blow over just yet.

[nebuladreamerrr]

“Where is mom?”| Kylian Mbappé x Fem Reader

Summary:  After a day filled with the profound exertion of bringing your second child into the world, a moment of tender anticipation arrives: it's time for your eldest to meet her new sibling.

Warnings: English is not my first language

After enduring six grueling hours of labor, you finally welcomed little Jules into the world—a spitting image of his father. As the nurse reassured you of his perfect health after all the tests performed to check both his heart and hearing, your thoughts drifted to your daughter, Manon, and how she might be feeling on this momentous day.

"Are you okay, my love?" Kylian's concerned voice interrupted your reverie as he made skin-to-skin contact on the couch in the room with Jules.

"Do you think Manon is okay?" you whispered, trying not to disturb the baby sleeping in your husband's arms.

"Honey, everything will be fine. You know she's with my mother, and if she was sick or something had happened, she would have contacted us," Kylian reassured, his voice gentle and soothing.

"Yes, Kylian, but she's not used to changes, and today has been anything but routine. Could you text your mother and ask her to come today instead of waiting until tomorrow to meet the baby? And to bring Manon with her, please," you pleaded, concern evident in your tone.

"Of course, my love. But try to relax and rest. I'm sure she's fine and just eager to cuddle us," Kylian said, gently laying Jules in his cot before enveloping you in a comforting embrace.

Your concern for Manon might have seemed excessive to some, but your motherly instinct told you otherwise. You knew your daughter well, and despite the joyous occasion, something deep down told you she wasn't having a good day. It had been a challenging few months for your family, especially for her. Manon was accustomed to being the center of attention, the youngest grandchild and only daughter of doting parents. Kylian, in particular, showered her with affection, earning her the title of "daddy's girl." Even on days when he had to travel for matches, he made sure she knew she was always his little girl. They had a ritual: before each pre-match training, he recorded himself telling her a story, allowing you to play it for her at bedtime. Often, she fell asleep hugging the mobile phone that displayed her father's face.

When you found out you were pregnant again, you couldn't help but worry about Manon's reaction. However, she surprised you by being thrilled at the news. Her excitement grew when she found out she was going to have a baby brother, and her joy was more than evident at the baby shower, where she participated enthusiastically as the one who popped the balloon revealing the gender of her baby brother.

But not everything had been smooth sailing in the past few months. Manon quickly grasped the concept of becoming a big sister. You couldn't blame her; you knew you and Kylian had indulged her, but how could you resist? So it wasn't surprising when she cried inconsolably as Kylian explained that she would have to stop sleeping in your double bed because the baby would need a lot of nighttime care. If she slept with you, she wouldn't get much rest.

Similarly, there was something you hadn't told Kylian in any depth because what little he knew had broken his heart, and had ended with him clinging to you as you both wept inconsolably, apologizing to her for having to leave home. But your little girl wasn't coping well with having to leave France next year, and you couldn't blame her. She had only just started kindergarten this year and had managed to make many friends at her little school. In addition, this year she had managed to start going to a ballet academy where she felt like a real princess in every class. You completely understood her frustration and understood how everything she knew would quickly cease to exist. There would be no more afternoons in the park, no more afternoons playing with Navas' children, and even your little girl would have to get used to another teacher and other doctors. But you knew that this was the best thing for Kylian and that he deserved to fulfill his dream. So you tried to convince your little girl, assuring her that she could still talk to her friends on your mobile, and you would keep in touch with their mothers so that, as soon as you returned to France for a holiday, your little girl could see her friends.

So when Fayza got that call, she couldn't have been happier. It was customary for her granddaughter to stay at Fayza’s home, but it had been exhausting trying to distract her when her little mind was elsewhere. Fayza had done her best to make the day entertaining, but it had started on a rough note. When your water broke at five in the morning, Kylian took you to the hospital, and they had to make a quick stop at Fayza's house to drop off your daughter. Fayza had prayed that her granddaughter would fall asleep quickly, as she had on many previous occasions, but it wasn't meant to be. Manon stayed awake all day, and by seven in the morning, Fayza had given up trying to coax her to sleep.

She had tried to make the day better by preparing her granddaughter's favorite breakfast, little Mickey Mouse waffles, accompanied by a good session of her favorite cartoons, but the plan failed when she barely took a bite. No matter what Fayza tried to cheer her up, the day wasn't working: not playing princesses, not a Disney movie marathon, not an afternoon with her uncle Ethan, who decided not to go out with his friends to try to improve his niece's mood. But when the clock struck five in the afternoon, the little girl couldn't take it any longer and cried inconsolably missing her mother.

Your daughter was very attached to her father, mostly because he was the father figure she saw the least of in her day-to-day life. As long as Manon felt you were close, everything was under control, but that day you were far away from her. Ethan quickly tried to calm her crying by singing her a little song while holding her in his arms and moving around the house. That calmed her for a moment, but both Ethan and Fayza knew that if the little girl did not see her mother that day, none of the household would be able to sleep that night.

Fayza tried to encourage Kylian about her little girl's state of mind by commenting that if they needed quiet and rest, it might not be advisable to take her to the hospital. However, Kylian played it down, thinking that her mother was simply worrying too much.

With a smile, Fayza turned to Manon and said, "Honey, put your coat on, we're going to see Mommy.”

Your little girl quickly buttoned up her coat and rushed out to the car. During the car ride, Fayza tried to explain to Manon that the hospital room would contain not only her parents, but also her little brother, but she barely paid attention when she sensed that they had arrived at the hospital. Strategically, Fayza quickly sent Ethan to buy a bouquet for you, knowing that when she unbuckled her granddaughter's car seat, she would jump out regardless of whether she was carrying a gift for her mother or not.

So when they asked where the room you were in was, Manon bolted for the lift and led the group as she walked down the corridors of the hospital looking at the different room numbers until she saw it: "Room 350".

She quickly opened the door and, catching a glimpse of your figure, couldn't help but burst into tears as she threw herself onto your hospital gurney, waiting for you to take her in your arms.

"My baby girl," you said as you looked worriedly at your daughter's reaction. You knew that her behavior had nothing to do with how she had been treated at her grandmother's house, where you knew she had been treated like a princess. But even though your maternal instinct had sensed it, you didn't know it was that bad.

Manon's constant crying caused little Jules to burst into tears as she woke him up from his warm sleep, which made your daughter cry even harder.

"Kylian, I think I'm going to go outside with Manon to soothe her. You can stay here while you introduce Jules to your parents," you said, making an effort to get up.

"Honey, you've just given birth. It's not advisable to stand for too long," said Kylian as he stopped you from getting up.

"Well, you're going to explain to me how we reassure our daughter because logically she needs a moment alone," you replied sharply. You hated talking to Kylian like that, but you felt that no one understood how much pain your princess was going through. You knew that with a few sweet lullabies, you could calm Jules down, but your daughter wouldn't be soothed so quickly.

With a short sigh, Kylian exclaimed, "I'm going in the next room with Jules and my family while you try to calm her down, okay? But don't make any sudden moves, please, I beg you. I'll be right back, sweetheart," he said, placing a small kiss on your daughter's head.

When the room fell silent, you couldn't help but ask your daughter why she felt that way and what was going on in her little head. Although many might think it was jealousy, it was quite the opposite. The little girl could not understand that you would not abandon her. So many things were changing in her daily life that she could only expect more changes. When she noticed the absence of both of you, she was frightened. She was used to Kylian's absence, but you had never been gone so long. Even when you were sick, she would lie on your breast while you watched a princess movie and wait for you to recover enough until you had the energy to play again.

After a long time of cuddling and stroking her hair, your little girl managed to calm down, but she stirred restlessly in your arms when she noticed someone opening the door to the room. However, she calmed down again when she noticed it was her father.

"How is my little princess?" exclaimed Kylian before lifting her nimbly into his arms as he gave you a look that begged you to tell him what had happened.

As she gave your daughter little kisses and caresses, you told him what had happened. "She was afraid that we were gone and that we would disappear from her life.

After hearing that, your husband's heart couldn't break more. "My love, that will never happen. Dad and mom love you so much and we will always be by your side. We could never abandon you," he said as he left delicate kisses on her little head.

"You promise?" your daughter asked with teary eyes. 

"Of course, sweetheart," he replied. 

After an hour of cuddling and enjoying a few moments with your firstborn, you decided it was time for her to meet her baby brother.

"Manon, would you like to meet Jules?" you asked cautiously.

Surprisingly, her reaction was a huge smile as she nodded her head repeatedly. Quickly, Kylian allowed his family back into the room as they relinquished Jules so that Manon could hold him in her arms with the help of her parents.

[saintescuderia]

pancakes (pt. 4)

AKA - the story of how the naive australian rookie befriended the gym junkie F1 hospitality worker with the shoe collection - and inadvertently broke the grid's most treasured and unspoken rule: you don't go for y/n.

series masterlist here :) // the pancakes recipe here :)

A/N: apologies if this isn't 100%. i wrote this in between travelling to japan to attend suzuka. and then i got sick and couldn't even go lol.

P4 - L-sits and pull-ups

Charles Leclerc was known for being a nice guy. 

All the boys knew it. Lando experienced it when he saw how Charles was genuine with service staff whenever they went somewhere. Alex had experienced it in how Charles treated his family, leaving the F1 boys to spend time with Arthur whenever F2 joined the schedule - or when his mother visited the Paddock. Whereas George had just done a quick FaceTime to his mother on Mother’s Day, Charles had sent Pascale Leclerc a luxury basket with a surprise yacht trip and a massage.

“She was having a bad week.” The Monegasque reasoned when the boys found out.

Pierre’s PS5 was a result of Charles’ kindness; sourcing it for his upset friend who had missed the drop. Max's apartment was a result of Charles' kindness; helping him look for places in his home city for the Dutchman looking to buy property in the foreign Monaco. Max owed Charles a lot.

If not for his apartment, then for his F1 seat.

Mercedes were taking too long. Charles knew someone at Red Bull's junior team who could help him score an interview with Helmut Marko. And when you told Charles to stop being so nice to Max after all the drama that happened in F2, he shrugged and said it was the nice thing to do.

So you, a Torro Rosso trainer, helped Max Verstappen with an interview.

Because Charles was kind and he asked you.

And there was nothing you wouldn't do for Charles Leclerc.

Charles’ circles especially were all aware of you before he even joined the grid. It was just that sort of thing. Everyone knows everyone in motorsports. All those boys had seen you hanging around him at the karting races. Were it not for the stark difference in appearance, some might’ve thought you were family. Some did. Because for the longest time, that’s what you and Charles were. Family.  

You were always there for him. You celebrated him when he won. You supported him when he didn’t. You were always the first person he went to when he finished his race. Not his parents, not Jules, not anyone - you. 

He would come to you and you would quickly repeat some key English phrases for the interviewers who would surely come for him. You would pat him on the back and offer a warm smile - no matter the result - and offer some feedback based on what you saw. Performance was your speciality after all.

Then, after everything, you guys would finish with a homemade plate of your pancakes. No matter what. That’s how it went and how it would always go. 

Until 2018.

That had been a shit fucking show of a year. The rookie trio had been super confused when they finally arrived at F1 and saw you dressed as Hospitality. Charles gave no answer to Lando, Alex or George, no explanation to why he barely acknowledged you. It had been Pierre, the one who had been there through it all, who had quietly explained to them what had happened.

For a while, Alex had a hard time talking to Max when he found out. 

Charles hadn’t been surprised that the grid had found out. Nothing ever stayed a secret in this fucking place. NDAs were a joke. The whole agreement between him and Charlotte had been unearthed by some lower ranking Ferrari employee who didn’t know how to keep shut. Then again, Charles had expected it to come out eventually. Half the drivers were dating for PR anyway. 

Ferrari were already on his case about finding a new replacement, a pretty girlfriend for him to post boyfriend material pictures with so it can ‘increase his numbers’ with the female fanbase. Since Drive To Survive had done well to popularise the sport with a whole new demographic of F1 fans, teams were trying to capitalise on this as much as possible. Charles quietly suspected that this was part of the reason why Ferrari approached Carlos.

That and they probably wanted to get rid of Seb as quickly as possible after he found out what happened between to you and raged.

Though, Charles could understand Seb’s stance on it. He himself was conflicted about it, half the time unsure if he had made the right call to listen to Mattia. He had just been hurt and upset and his father had just passed away and the press had been vicious and Charles was just desperate to fulfil his dream of getting the coveted seat. 

Well, your joint dream. 

It had been the dream of the both of you. It was why you worked just as hard as he did. You had taught him English. He had taught you Italian. He networked and raced. You built cars and trained. He had helped you get a job in Torro Rosso. You had helped him get a seat in Alfa Romeo. 

Which, of course, led to him getting a spot in Scuderia Ferrari. 

Except by the time he was putting on the red, you two were no longer speaking to one another. Or, he was no longer speaking to you and you finally accepted he had cut you off. Gone were the days where he was searching the crowds for your face, rushing to you after the race finished.

Five years ago, he stopped eating pancakes. 

He knew you still made them, of course. And not because pancakes had been your everyday breakfast since you both turned fourteen and you started weightlifting and tracking your macros. He knew because he had seen some Alpine reserve driver eating them. 

His name was Oscar Jack Piastri. F2 Champion who also won F3 and the Renault Cup. He had more trophies than anyone else his age. For a moment, Charles thought it was because you back training drivers and were working with him.

Arthur later refuted this when Charles was grilling him that no, you weren't training Oscar Piastri. You actually hadn’t had much interaction with him when you would come down to F2. 

“Does this mean you’re talking to Y/N again?” Arthur had asked, assuming that’s why Charles was asking about you. “Can we be friends with her again?”

“No.” 

“You know maman still doesn’t believe what happened.”

Charles was known for being a nice guy, but he hung up on his brother. Charles really was one of the kinder drivers, but when Alex told them about the tweet, he had scoffed and sneered. When Oscar Piastri himself arrived in orange and held his hand out to greet the nice Monacoan driver, Charles glared and kept his arms crossed. Fuck this. He was not going to shake Oscar Piastri’s fucking hand. 

Even though, deep down, Charles knew there was no need for this. Arthur had confirmed that Oscar really was just a really talented driver - Y/N hadn’t trained him. This was no Max Verstappen situation.

Moreover, it wasn’t like Charles was in Daniel Ricciardo’s position.

If it weren't for the million cameras recording the first meeting of the two Australian drivers, Charles could only imagine Daniel's reaction to the rookie. It was one thing that Oscar essentially took Ricciardo's seat.

The other was that everyone had seen him with you.

Admittedly, Daniel had a reason to not want to shake Oscar’s hand, Charles could reason. Even if he still thought Ricciardo was an espèce de putain merde for what he did to you. 

Still, Charles couldn’t explain it. He wouldn’t explain it. He didn’t need to. The grid had so far understood it perfectly fine; you don’t go near Y/N. When Logan had joined the grid, Alex had the good sense to quietly fill him in on what had happened.

Why the fuck couldn’t Lando do the same?

Which brings us to right now: Bahrain 2023. A control unit failure meant a DNF for his first race of the season. When is this bad luck going to end? Charles retired his car, managing to make it past the McLaren garage on his way to the Ferrari red at the end of the Pit Lane.

It was just as well that his car was slowing to a stall. It meant that he managed to catch a glimpse of the McLaren garage - and the naive Australian rookie stood with a plate in his hands, very clearly eating some pancakes. 

Charles almost drove into a mechanic. 

It was 3am. $uicideboy$ was playing through your headphones. You weren’t wearing any shoes. 

This could only mean one thing: you were doing calisthenics. 

Your arms were shaking slighting as you bent your elbows and tucked your legs in before straightening them. Your grip on the parallette bars was slipping but you engaged your core tighter, hoping to keep balanced as you straightened out your legs and held the L-sit position. 

Oscar had DNF’ed on lap 13. The media was already going wild with questions about his decision to ditch Alpine for McLaren and whether or not this was just karma. McLaren looked horrible. Even his teammate had finished 17th. No matter your feelings on the young Brit, even you had to admit Lando Norris was a decent driver. 

During the course of pre-season preparations, wind had carried the gossip that Zak Brown had revealed the car to the team earlier this year with a sub-par level of enthusiasm. Whilst it wasn’t uncommon for cars to arrive at Sakhir with plans for future upgrades… you hadn’t thought it would be this bad. For McLaren. At this rate, the MCL60 was looking like a back of the field car. 

What’s more the team was struggling. One only needed to look at their qualifying session to see how bad it had been. Engineers giving mixed reports. Oscar’s radio not working and getting out in Q1. Lando getting mixed tyres and getting out in Q2. A whole ass clusterfuck, in your opinion.

And Daniel had been there, smiling smug whenever the camera decided to pan to the Red Bull garage.

The song changed in your headphones. Your arm strained. You dropped, fell forward. Cue the stream of expletives that would’ve made even Guenther blush.

You knew that going to the gym after the race had finished up - a night race that - was going to mess up your sleep schedule. However, you were too wired after everything to go to sleep. You needed the dopamine rush. There was too much going on for you to process any other way.

Because, firstly, you needed to get rid of the image of Daniel’s smug smirk that was currently etched into your brain.

You had skipped your post-dinner protein shake and had your coffees black today. You had started your session with a series of HIIT sprints on the treadmill before you did as many pull ups as your body would allow. It had been quite some time since you had done calisthenics training so religiously but you were already internally creating a new program for yourself. 

That is, you were already mentally preparing for the cut you had decided to undertake the moment Daniel Ricciardo had walked into the gym after finding out he'd lost his seat. And blame you for it.

You pushed yourself up off the ground and came to your parallette bars again. You grabbed each one and then lifted yourself up again. You closed your eyes and willed your brain to focus purely on the lactic acid running through your body. 

Because, secondly, you were stressing more than you should about Charles’ DNF.

You had watched the testing sessions carefully. You always did. Always keeping an eye out on the red car with the black T cam. Charles hadn’t done too bad but, obviously, it was hard to give a genuine judge. Everyone always sandbagged.

For example, Red Bull didn’t look as strong in testing, but then came out on race day and finished as they did. You could be happy for Max, especially since Jos was in attendance and knew just what that meant… but you also knew how it would look for Ferrari that Carlos had finished fourth and Charles hadn’t even finished the race. 

The car did look strong through. That was evident by how Ferrari had done in qualifying. Charles had out qualified Carlos, a narrow Ferrari 3-4 behind a Red Bull 1-2. However, your former childhood best friend had a bad luck streak unlike anything you had ever witnessed. 

And even though the word ‘former’ was in the equation, you never liked seeing Charles like this. Even if he was likely the reason no one in the grid spoke to you anymore.

Well, until now.

Because, thirdly, Oscar Piastri threw a spanner in the works.

You knew how it was going to look. You knew. It was one thing for you to interact this closely with a driver. It was another thing entirely for you to unofficially train him. However, as Zak Brown had found out, there was no way you could be allowed to join McLaren as a performance trainer for Oscar.

When the young driver had filled you in about his meetings with Zak Brown and his particular stipulation, you called him an idiot and told him to sign. When Oscar filled you in about his new plan to be able to work alongside you through all the loopholes his father's lawyer found, you called him an idiot and told him it wasn't worth it.

"I beg to differ. If you don't want to, that's fine. But not because of whatever drama happened."

He knew the drama. It was impossible that a team principle had looked into having you as his driver 's trainer and not found out what had happened. It was also impossible that Oscar Piastri, former Prema driver - as in, former Arthur Leclerc teammate - and current teammate to loose tongue Lando, didn't know about you and Charles.

You had honestly just waited for the moment he would bring it up. He never did.

Because Oscar, you were coming to learn, was far more level-headed and mature than most the drivers on this grid. And he was so young. You didn't want to see anyone fuck that up. You really, really didn't.

Still, you said no.

Then a week later you saw that fucking tractor make him DNF.

You leaned forward and brought yourself down into a handstand, counting to ten before bending your elbows and lowering yourself slowly. You lifted yourself up and then tucked your legs once more. Your whole body was shaking more and more know but and you fought to breathe through it. You finally lowered yourself and let out a deep huff. Whilst you weren't pleased with how out of practice you were, you were a little pleased that you finally managed to lower yourself - instead of falling down.

You looked ahead at the mirrors and then saw a familiar face of the driver walking into the gym. Oscar dropped his gym bag near yours and went straight to the treadmill to warm up. You kept your eyes on him as you held yourself up on the parallettes and watched the young driver fiddle with his phone and earphones before starting a light jog.

You took a moment before you pulled yourself up and went over to him. Oscar met your eyes as he continued to jog. He pulled down earphone but you said nothing as you pressed the button to increase the speed. Oscar raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

"45 seconds on. 15 seconds off. 20 repetitions." You said. Oscar nodded and put his earphone back in. You shook your head. He frowned and pulled them down.

"You don't drive with music so don't play anything." You said. "Feeling something in your ear needs to become second nature."

He nodded and you went to his phone and pressed pause. Then you made a voice when you noticed that Ed Sheeran was playing.

"Don't judge me." Oscar said.

"I am. You're working out to fucking Ed Sheeran." You responded with a scrunched nose. Oscar shook his head, smiling slightly, but said nothing else. In the silence, you observed his form and counted his breaths. You noticed slight irregularity with his inhale and exhales and immediately pulled him up on it.

And so you spent the rest of the night training Oscar Piastri.

By the time you both finished, and he gave you a tired and sweaty high five, the clock read five thirteen in the morning.

< prev ch [3] | next ch [5] >

taglist:

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@hiireadstuff @samantha-chicago @fionaschicken @casperlikej @bookstore-of-dreams

@itsjustkhaos @sam-is-lost @laneyspaulding19

[emjayewrites]

The Year I Turned 25 • JK + AT (2/10)

SYNOPSIS: Grammy-winning R&B artist Y/N Y/LN, 25, is closing out the North American leg of her tour, riding high on the success of her sophomore album "The Year I Turned 24" - a raw, emotional project born from her public breakup with an NFL player. As she prepares for six weeks in Europe before the international leg of her tour, she's determined to have her own "hot girl summer," yet she’s unaware that she's about to get entangled with not one but two professional footballers - Jules Koundé and Aurélien Tchouaméni - sparking new public interest in her love life and forcing her to confront her fears about dating athletes again.​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

PAIRINGS: Jules Koundé x Y/N Y/LN (fc: Ayra Starr) x Aurélien Tchouaméni

WARNINGS: cursing, football b.s., not so glamorous life of a celebrity, mentions of mental illness/misogyny/slut shaming/cheating, drug use (marijuana), drinking, rotational dating, eventual smut, paragon partners/polyamory — 18+ only

TAGLIST: @irishmanwhore, @sucredreamer, @whoevenisthiz, @saturnville, @peyiswriting, @greedyjudge2, @alika-4466, @julescpu, @lettersofgold, @hopefulromantic1, @a-moment-captured, @serpenttines-library, @f1-football-fiend, @purplelewlew, @elyseesarchive, @enretrogue, @2serenity0, @yeea-nah, @127hydrangeas, @sunfairyy, @pinkcatcus, @muglermami, @bbgkoo, @greyishbach @sinflowersugar @cranberryjulce @sailurmewn

A/N: I know that I said that I am no longer writing but I promised a mutual that this would happen. There’s changed to actual events in order for this timeline to work (i.e. Spanish Grand Prix happening on June 21st). Let me know if you want to be added/removed from the taglist.

CHAPTER 2: Le Français

"Je suis une femme," YN repeated after her Duolingo owl, spooning mushy oatmeal into her mouth. After that kiss last night, learning French seemed like the logical next step.

The fluffy hotel robe did little to cool down her overheated skin, even after a shower so cold it could rival an Arctic expedition. She was down astronomically bad, and it was all because of Jules Koundé.

"Jules. Koundé." She tested the name on her tongue. Jhool Koon-day. Even his name was sexy, all masculine energy and French sophistication.

They always said French men were the best lovers. Though Enzo had definitely set a high bar for the Italians - especially that night with Carina. YN had gotten more action in the past week than in her entire relationship with Damari.

Don't think about Damari and his boring, porn-educated ass, both her rational and intrusive thoughts agreed. She had to come to a whole different continent to get properly dicked-down without using her beloved Rose.

"Well, RIP Rose," she saluted her trusty vibrator back home. "You served me well, but after this summer? Retirement."

Her phone buzzed twice:

Jules 🇫🇷: 30 minutes. Can't wait to see you 😚

LewLew Bean: How's Germany treating you? 👀 Also - you free July 7th? Silverstone race. We need to catch up

She checked her calendar quickly - no conflict with Jules' matches.

YN to LewLew Bean: Germany is… interesting 😏 And yes! Count me in for Silverstone!

LewLew Bean: "Interesting" = You're already causing trouble aren't you? Good. That's what I taught you 😌

YN to Jules 🇫🇷: Can't wait! See you soon 😘

Sliding off the bed, she rifled through her closet before pulling out a white halter-neck tennis dress. She paired it with Adidas Court Bolds and the "FRANCE" cap she'd bought last night during her post-kiss vape-and-pace session at the corner store (the horniness had been THAT real).

A knock at her door sent her heart racing. One last finger-comb through her hair, another swipe of lipgloss, grab the Constance, make sure she has her phone and hotel key card—

Jules stood there in his national team tracksuit, dreads pulled back in pigtails, looking unfairly cute and sexy at the same time. His eyes did a slow scan from her feet up, lingering on her lips.

"Morning."

"Morn–" was all she managed before his lips claimed hers, drawing a soft hum from her throat. When he pulled back, he nipped her bottom lip, making her gasp.

"You're such a nasty freak," she said in wonderment.

Jules just chuckled. "Let's go, ma belle."

YN let him guide her to the elevator, very aware of his hand at the base of her spine, hovering dangerously close to her ass.

In the lobby, Jules kept one hand on her lower back as they chatted about breakfast ("Mushy oatmeal? I'll take you somewhere proper tomorrow"). Before sliding into the waiting SUV, he opened her door - ever the gentleman - then delivered a firm pat to her ass that was anything but gentlemanly.

Did this man just… That wasn't just a pat, that was a whole statement of intent.

The drive to the stadium was a blur of Jules explaining the tournament structure while YN tried not to fixate on how that simple touch had reignited every nerve ending in her body.

"So quarter-finals next week, then semis next if you win?" She tried to focus on the actual conversation.

"Oui. Then hopefully the final in Berlin." His confidence was infectious.

The Merkur Spiel-Arena rose before them, all modern architecture and gleaming glass. Jules led her through the VIP entrance, up several elevators, until they reached the highest level of the stadium.

"This is my favorite spot," he said, leading her to the edge. The morning sun cast long shadows across the pristine pitch below. "You can see everything from up here."

"It's really nice."

"Your cap is cute," he nodded at her tourist shop purchase. "But we need to get you proper Les Bleus gear. Jersey maybe?"

From their perch, Jules spotted movement below in the corner of his eye. He yelled out something in French that had YN weak in the knees, even if she had no idea what it meant, and the people yelled something back.

"Who's that?" YN squinted at the tiny figures running drills below. "They look like very athletic brown blobs to me. My eyesight is garbage. I'm basically blind past ten feet."

"My teammates," Jules explained, turning back towards her. "Want to meet them?"

Oh wow… now we're being introduced to his teammates? Personal much? her rational thoughts chimed in.

This is solid, meaning he wants to fuck you. For real! Get 'em girl! her intrusive thoughts countered.

After using the elevator to head down, they walked through the tunnel onto the pitch, and the first player to bound over was pure sunshine energy. His micro dreads bounced as he jogged up, grinning like an excited puppy.

"Cama!" Jules dapped him up. "This is YN."

Camavinga was cute - all bright eyes and boyish charm. But her horn-o-meter barely registered a 3. Sweet, but not the kind to make her pussy throb.

And then he approached.

Where Jules gave off "runway model who'll make love to you by the fireplace with a few kinks up his sleeve" energy, this man emanated pure male BDE - the type to choke you out while calling you a worthless little slut and spit in your mouth.

Tall, dark-skin, lean but muscled, shirtless (Lord help her), with hair styled in a high-taper fade and features that belonged in a high fashion campaign. His walk was pure predator, all confident swagger.

Jules dapped him up as well. "YN, this is Aurélien."

Aw-ree-lee-an.

The way Jules said his name, all French pronunciation, had her hot and bothered before Aurélien even opened his mouth. His name matched him perfectly - regal but with an edge, like expensive dark chocolate with a little spicy kick.

Aurélien's gaze fixed on her with an intensity that made her mouth go dry. "What's up?"

YN's brain froze. Actual words failed to form. "I-I…"

Jules giggled (literally!) at her obvious short-circuit while Aurélien's mouth quirked into a knowing smirk. He knew exactly what he was doing and he knew he had her hook, line, and sinker.

Well fuck, her intrusive thoughts swooned. Looks like the roster just got another spot.

"So you're the singer Jules won't shut up about," Aurélien's voice was impossibly deep, his French accent richer and darker than Jules'. Every word felt like honey dripping down YN's spine.

"That's me," she managed, proud her voice didn't crack.

Cama launched into rapid-fire questions about her music, while Jules kept his hand protectively at her waist. But Aurélien… Aurélien just watched.

His tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip, teeth worrying it as his eyes tracked her every movement. Even when she was focused on answering Cama's enthusiastic questions about her tour, she could feel that intense gaze.

"Your song about identity struggles," he suddenly cut in, his deep voice making everyone else pause. "It's really dope."

Lord, even when he's being vulnerable he sounds like he wants to rail you against a wall, her intrusive thoughts screamed.

"The bridge of that song," his tongue made another appearance, "it's tough."

"I-" YN started, but her brain was barely working as he finally broke into a full smile.

Roster status: CONFIRMED, her intrusive thoughts declared. Hot Girl Summer just leveled up.

"We should let you guys get back to practice," Jules said, a note in his voice that YN couldn't quite read. "I'll see you both at dinner?"

DINNER? With both of them?

Aurélien's smirk returned. "Wouldn't miss it."

As Jules led her away, she could still feel those eyes following her. YN's thoughts were still racing about Aurélien - that intense gaze, the way his tongue worried at his bottom lip, how his voice seemed to vibrate through her entire body. The man was dangerous in the best possible way. Maybe she could–

Her internal monologue cut short as Jules suddenly backed her against the tunnel wall, caging her in. His expression was unreadable — a mix of amusement, intensity, and something darker that made her pulse quicken.

"Jules?" she wondered with wide eyes.

"I knew it would happen." He shook his head, letting out an almost skeptical chuckle.

"What are you—"

"You feeling Auré?" YN's lips pursed together. "It's okay if you are, I'm not mad."

"But you're pinning me to a wall says otherwise..."

He removed his hands from either side of her face and moved back. "Désolé."

"'S'fine."

Jules cleared his throat. "Auré and I go way back - we knew each other since teenagers playing for Girondins in Bordeaux. Him and I...it always happens." Another laugh, then his eyes hardened with intensity. "We tend to like the same girl....a lot."

"Oh?" YN said, eyebrows furrowing, encouraging him to continue.

"Our type is the exact same so what can you expect? I just never...well actually no, this makes sense."

"Wait, how did you know that he likes me?"

Jules just gave her a look that screamed Woman, are you fucking blind?

"You're grown, so I won't go off and say it's me or him, that's pathetic as fuck. I just want honesty, however."

"On?" YN asked, sass creeping into her voice.

"If you fuck him or not."

"Why does that even matter?"

Jules moved close again, his brown eyes never leaving hers, except for a brief glance at her lips. "Because I want to fuck you too."

I TOLD YOU, GIRL!!! her intrusive thoughts screamed in victory.

Fuck... her rational thoughts whispered.

YN stood there, thoroughly shook. Summer of YN had just taken an unexpected turn.

_______________________________________________

YN paced her hotel balcony, taking desperate pulls from her CBD vape like it was a lifeline. Her hands were shaking slightly as she pulled up Lewis' contact.

He answered on the second ring. "I know that tone. You got tea." Always the gossiper.

"I'm having a crisis."

"Miles and Roscoe are with me – want me to call back?"

"No, put me on speaker. I need all the guy perspective I can get."

"Huge fan, by the way," Miles' British accent chimed in.

Any other day, two British accents would have her swooning. Today? She was too stressed to even notice.

"Go 'head," Lewis encouraged.

She spilled everything — the kiss with Jules, meeting Aurélien, the tunnel confrontation, her and Jules' heated makeout session before he left for practice. "I should be getting ready for the match but instead I'm out here having an anxiety attack!"

Lewis was quiet for a moment. "Shit. I'm so proud of you, sweetheart."

"Don't mock me!"

"I'm deadass."

"You not gonna fuck 'em both, are you?" Miles asked. "They're best friends."

She heard Lewis murmur something about "like how we shared Corinne…"

"Oh that was fun," Miles reminisced, "but I don't think this is the same, bruv."

"Hello? What about ME?!" YN screeched.

"Fuck them both," Lewis said simply.

YN's eyes bugged out cartoon-style. "Lewis!! Did you not just hear what I said–"

"It's your Hot Girl Summer, right? You're getting your lick back and exploring all the things you weren't given by that limp-dicked motherfucker. Fuck. Them. Both. But use protection."

"Oh fuck, bruv," Miles laughed. "YN, maybe they want you to do that? Usually code for wanting a threesome. You don't have to if you're uncomfortable. Most guys–"

"I already did that, Miles." Another deep inhale of CBD.

"Holy fuck, when?" Lewis demanded.

"In Florence… 'member Enzo? I… uh… kinda slept with him and his friend, Carina…"

"Oh wow, a girl? So 'What They Don't Know' is really true?" Miles asked.

"Well, more bi-curious but Carina's tits were insane and she could even — you know what, let's not get distracted. Yes, I did it before. Now, do I want to do it again? Maybe. Depends how it comes about but I don't want to ruin their friendship."

"If they have the same type, I'm certain it happened before," Lewis reasoned.

"Plus Jules just wants honesty," Miles added. "Said he respects if you sleep with Aurélien. Ball's in your court."

By the time she hung up, YN was somehow more confused than before. But her shoulders felt lighter.

Now she just had to figure out what to wear to this damn match. After two more puffs from her vape, she went back into her room and got dressed.

An hour later, YN studied her reflection, adjusting the Les Bleus jersey Jules had given her. The fabric felt expensive, custom-fit. She paired it with high-waisted jeans that made her ass look fantastic - if she was going to have two French footballers eyeing her, she might as well give them something to look at.

In the car, she deep-dived their Instagrams. Jules' feed was pure fashion editorial — designer fits, artistic shots in Paris and Barcelona, the occasional shirtless workout pic that made her bite her lip. His captions were thoughtful, sometimes poetry in French that had her reaching for Google translate. Meanwhile, Aurélien's grid screamed quiet confidence — training videos where his muscles rippled, candid shots with that intense gaze, photos with his family that somehow made him even sexier. Both their comment sections were thirsty as hell, but neither seemed to engage with the attention.

JULES: Pros:

Those dreads and that smile that haunted her dreams

French model vibes with the fashion sense to match

Already kissed (and LORD what a kiss)

Gentleman in streets, freak in sheets energy

Actually listens when she talks, remembers details

That swagger when he walks

Speaks three languages fluently

Likes her music (actually listens to it)

Cons:

Not usually her type physically

Athlete (still trying to break that habit)

Best friends with potential other dick appointment

Might be too smooth for his own good

AURÉLIEN: Pros:

Tall dark and handsome (her exact type)

That VOICE could make her pregnant just listening

Those EYES that seem to see right through her

Built like a Greek god with abs for days

BDE off the charts

Probably throws it down like a champion

Quiet confidence that screams "I can ruin you"

Has a cute dog (Ocho gets extra brownie points)

Cons:

Athlete

Best friends with current makeout partner

Might be too intense

Haven't even kissed yet (but lord does she want to)

Probably knows exactly how hot he is

The stadium was a madhouse. French fans had taken over one end, their chants echoing across the pitch. She filmed some of the pre-match atmosphere for Big Kyle ("Girl what in the soccer hell are you doing?" he texted back) and her mama ("Get you one of them fine men baby!").

When the teams lined up, her breath caught. Jules and Aurélien stood next to each other, both in their element. Jules caught her eye and winked while Aurélien's gaze was pure heat – a deadly combination that had her squirming in her seat.

The match itself was intense. She found herself actually getting into it, screaming at calls she didn't understand and filming Jules' defensive masterclass and Aurélien's midfield dominance.

"This sport is all edge, no release," she muttered in annoyance during halftime.

France's goal in the 85th minute sent the stadium into chaos. She jumped up with everyone else. The team celebration was pure joy – until she caught sight of Jules and Aurélien, shirts clinging with sweat, muscles pumped from exertion.

I'm in trouble, she thought, crossing her legs.

Her pussy throbbed in agreement.

_______________________________________________

YN waited in the designated area, trying not to stare at the crowd of women who looked like they'd stepped straight out of a Fashion Nova ad. All skin-tight dresses and platform heels, clutching jerseys and phones.

This must be the WAG recruitment section.

Aurélien emerged first, fresh from the showers in ripped jeans and a Dior tee, topped with Virgil's Nike collab.

"RIP Virg," YN said automatically, nodding at his feet. "I've got the same pair."

His eyes lit up. "You know about Virgil?"

"Please, I cried when he passed. The Louis drops were iconic."

They fell into easy conversation about fashion until Jules appeared, also shower-fresh and designer-clad.

"Cama's staying back to play COD with Michael and Ibou," Jules announced.

Aurélien kissed his teeth, saying something in French that made Jules smirk (she really needed to learn ASAP).

Oh god, she realized as panic began to settle at the pit of her stomach. It's just us three.

The restaurant was all mood lighting and exposed brick, with intimate crescent-shaped booths. Of course she ended up sandwiched between them, Jules' thigh pressed against hers on one side, Aurélien's arm brushing her shoulder on the other.

She focused intently on her menu, then the silverware, then counting the exposed beams above - anything to distract from the heat radiating from both men.

Aurélien's throat clearing broke her concentration. "The wine here is excellent."

"Especially with the steak," Jules added, his hand finding her thigh under the table.

Her foot-in-mouth disease struck again: "Isn't this a bit awkward?"

"Only because you're making it awkward," Aurélien's voice dropped lower as his arm settled around her shoulders.

"Very awkward," Jules agreed, fingers drawing patterns on her thigh.

The waitress's arrival was both salvation and torture - salvation because it broke the tension, torture because after ordering her strongest cocktail, she was right back to being trapped between them.

Summer of YN? her intrusive thoughts purred. More like Summer of Getting RAILED.

For once, her rational thoughts didn't disagree.

"The duck here is a good choice," Jules suggested, his hand still drawing lazy circles on her thigh.

Aurélien's touch crept up her arm to the base of her neck, fingers gently caressing. "The fish too."

The dual sensation sent electricity through her body. "I have to pee!"

She practically sprinted to the bathroom after Aurélien let her out, locking herself in a stall and calling her mama.

"Mama, I'm at dinner with both of them and I don't know what to do!"

"Baby girl, listen to me," Sherelle's voice was unusually serious. "Don't make any choices tonight if you're still conflicted – not about one, not about both. Just enjoy the free meal."

"Thanks mama."

After actually using the bathroom and washing her hands, YN stared at her reflection, taking deep breaths.

She returned to find them laughing, speaking French:

"Ce but était fou!" (That goal was insane!)

"Oui, mais ton arrêt était meilleur." (Yeah, but your save was better)

"We were about to send a search party," Aurélien teased, letting her slide back in.

Jules pushed her drink closer. She muttered thanks and downed half of it.

"Damn girl," Aurélien whistled.

Jules chuckled while YN sat up straighter, trying to ignore how their hands found their previous positions - though now Aurélien was playing with her hair.

The waitress returned for their orders, both men responding with "Danke schön."

Four languages, her brain noted. Impressive.

As they ate, Aurélien showed her more pictures of his Belgian Malinois, Ocho. "He's my baby."

But their touches never stopped — Jules' hand on her thigh, Aurélien's fingers in her hair. Their eyes kept finding her, both clearly interested.

The rest of dinner was a delicious torture. YN learned that Aurélien had picked up some Italian during his time at AS Monaco, both men were well-traveled, passionate about their craft, and seemed to genuinely want to know her thoughts on everything from music to politics.

"Your take on identity in 'Quarter Life Crisis' went hard," Aurélien said, his fingers still playing with her hair. "Being Black in predominantly white spaces…"

"The pressure to conform," Jules added, squeezing her thigh gently.

They had dessert – a dark chocolate mousse that had YN trying not to make inappropriate sounds as she ate. Both men watched her lips wrap around the spoon with undisguised longing.

When the check came (which they split, waving off her attempt to contribute), YN's head was swimming from both the cocktails and the constant physical contact.

"Where to next?" Jules asked, helping her out of the booth.

"I should probably head back…" she started, but Aurélien's hand found the small of her back.

"We could get drinks at our hotel," he said, that deep voice making her shiver.

The look Jules and Aurélien exchanged wasn't lost on her. Her mama's words echoed in her head: Don't make any choices tonight if you're still conflicted.

"Rain check?" she managed.

"Sure, chérie," Jules smiled, though his eyes held heat. "Let us at least drive you back."

The car ride was silent but charged. Jules sat next to her in the back while Aurélien took the front, but she could feel both their attention on her.

Outside her hotel, they both got out to say goodnight. Jules kissed her cheek, lingering. "Sweet dreams."

Aurélien's goodbye was a whispered "À bientôt" that made her toes curl.

In her room, YN collapsed on the bed, her skin still tingling from their touches.

Her phone buzzed - a group chat had been created:

Jules 🇫🇷: Thank you for having dinner with us x

Aurélien 🌹: Sleep well, belle

I really am in deep fuckin' trouble, she thought, staring at the ceiling.

YN scrolled through her phone, some German reality show playing in the background. Her Instagram feed was flooded with footage from yesterday's match, but one post made her pause:

[Photos: YN cheering at the match, YN in Jules' jersey, zoomed shot of Jules looking her way during warmup]

Liked by theshaderoom, balleralert, and 394,197 others

PopCultureTeaaa: Grammy winner YN_YLN spotted at France vs Belgium match in Düsseldorf 👀 Wearing Les Bleus jersey and sitting pitch-side… Wonder which French player caught her attention? Sources say she was seen with defender Jules Koundé 🔥 Hot Girl Summer continues!

view all comments….

damari_rushes: Lmao anything for clout 🤡 ↳ tsrfans: You really got the nerve after what YOU did? 💀 ↳ popculture_tea: Not you in the comments when you got caught with 3 different girls ↳ ynglobal: WEREN'T YOU JUST WITH A SWIMSUIT MODEL?? Sir… ↳ chartdata: Her album about you went #1 tho 🤷🏾‍♀️ balleralert: Jules Koundé? Good upgrade sis 👏🏾 complex: W rizz sportsbible: Koundé's defense strong on and off the pitch deuxmoi: Actually saw her at dinner with TWO French players 👀

The DeuxMoi comment made her stomach flip. There were blurry shots of her with Jules, but none with Aurélien… yet. If people found out about both of them…

A knock interrupted her spiral. She adjusted her bonnet, wrapped her robe tighter, and peeked through the peephole – only to find it blocked.

"Just open the door, cherie," Jules' voice called out.

She opened it to find both men holding paper bags. "This has to be a fucking joke."

Aurélien's smirk could melt steel. "Are you gonna let us in or…"

"I'm seriously thinking against it."

Jules chuckled. "We got crepes."

The smell hit her nose and her stomach betrayed her with a growl. "Fine, but no funny business." She moved aside to let them in and watched them unpack enough food for a small army, squinting suspiciously.

They'd clearly planned this.

After washing their hands, they settled at the dining table.

"Come sit and eat, YN," Aurélien said, biting into his bacon.

"Yeah, cherie," Jules added.

YN sat between them again and they ate in silence until Jules shifted toward her. "We want to apologize about last night. We might've come on too strong. We're French, it's unfortunately in our DNA to just–"

"Go off the deep end?" YN finished, spreading jam on her croissant.

"Yeah…" Jules laughed. "Like I told you before. Auré and I have been tight since Bordeaux - that's about nine years of friendship."

"Give or take," Aurélien added.

Jules rolled his eyes fondly. "That's my bro. And dealing with liking the same girl…again… is annoying but it is what it is."

YN blinked. "So…?"

Aurélien interlaced his fingers, placing both hands on the table. "We just trying to see who should talk to you or if you could make it so much easier and just hang out with us both. Separately or together."

"Oh." Then a lightbulb went off in realization: "OH."

"I mean if you want," Jules rushed out, eyes mischievous.

"Or separately," Aurélien added.

"Either way works with us."

"Hold on," YN's mouth moved faster than her brain. "You guys… did… it… before?"

"Once or twice," Aurélien shrugged. "We were young, eighteen and twenty with some girl from Bordeaux."

"We really didn't know what we were doing," Jules admitted. "But Auré and I were talking last night after we dropped you off. Hashed some things out. Decided that if it did happen again, we should talk about it."

"And this is what you guys came up with?" They nodded and she fanned herself with a napkin. "Okay… uh… thanks for the honesty?"

"You're welcome."

"No problem."

"Can I think about all this?" YN asked. "I mean, yes to separately, but the idea of both… at the same time…. I need more time to reflect on all that."

"Sure," they chorused.

"And you guys wouldn't be mad at each other, will you?"

They laughed. "No, Jules and I are brothers for life," Aurélien smiled.

"Okay, whew…" She wiped fake sweat from her brow. "And you know this isn't serious, right? Like don't catch any feelings…" Foot, meet mouth again. "What I mean is that I'm focusing on my career and I don't want to get in any relationship right now–"

"We understand," Jules said.

"100%" Aurélien agreed.

They finished breakfast, Jules and Aurélien clearing the table like they'd done this a hundred times before.

"Got a sponsor meeting," Jules announced. "See you later?"

"Yeah, later," YN agreed before his lips found hers, his hand cradling her head. Even with Aurélien watching, the kiss made her toes curl.

"Prends soin de notre fille," (Take care of our girl) Jules told Aurélien.

Aurélien sucked his teeth, pushing him playfully before dapping him up.

Once Jules left, Aurélien's gaze found her. "Let's chill, bébé." He took her hand, leading her to the bed. He kicked off his sneakers - careful not to crease them - and lounged like he belonged there.

YN's thoughts went into overdrive. The way he moved, all casual confidence and lean muscle, had her brain shorting out. And those hands….Lord, those hands looked like they could...

"Come 'ere," he beckoned, and something about being told what to do made her melt. She lay beside him as he propped himself up on an elbow, studying her. "You're stunning, you know that?" His fingers traced her jawline. "Those eyes... that smile... the way you light up when you talk about music."

"You're handsome," she offered.

"I know." That smirk revealed an unexpected dimple on his right cheek. His cockiness should've been a red flag, but somehow it just made him more attractive.

Maybe athletes aren't ALL bad, she mused. At least these three.

We don't date them, her rational brain warned.

But fucking them? Go 'head girlfriend! her intrusive thoughts cheered.

"What're you thinking about?" His voice was pure sin - deep like aged whiskey, the kind of voice that could talk you into anything and make you thank him after.

"Nothing much." She changed the subject. "What did Jules say before he left?"

"Honest?"

"That's the best policy."

"He said to 'take care of our girl'."

YN blinked. "Wow, you guys really don't waste any time."

"We're French," he chuckled as if that explained everything. "Europeans are a little…"

"Possessive? Handsy?"

"We like what we like," he shrugged. "And we're just going off of you. Like you said at breakfast - separately until you want both. So separate it is. For however long you want to hang out with us, you're our girl."

Something about being "their girl" made her stomach flip pleasantly.

"And if I wanted to 'hang out' with other people?"

He gave her a look. "As long as it isn't anyone on the team, we're cool."

"I don't even know anyone else on the team besides you and Jules–"

"Good, let's keep it that way. No more teammates, but outside of that… sure, why not?"

"Are you going to see other–"

"Nah, I'm fine with what I have in front of me."

"Interesting."

"What can I say? I know how to share," he chuckled. "I'm a big brother, so I guess it comes with the territory."

"I saw the pictures on your IG, the ones with your siblings."

"Are you stalking me?"

"No," she said quickly. Yes.

"Yeah, I have two younger siblings. Anne-Maïsha and Yannis. Do you have any?"

YN shook her head. "Only child… at least from what I know. My dad left me and mama when I was three, so who knows?"

"I'm sorry, ma belle," he said softly, his large hand covering hers and giving it a light squeeze.

YN scoffed as memories of her absent sperm donor flooded her mind. "It's okay. Fuck him."

"Fuck him then."

Her smile had barely formed before his lips found hers. If Jules kissed like he was trying to steal her soul, Aurélien kissed like he already owned it. His lips were soft like the finest pillows, and the way he kissed was pure dominance — all teeth and tongue and promises of what that mouth could do elsewhere. When he pulled back, that smirk was deadly.

"You're going to be a problem. Aren't you?" she asked, but already knowing the answer.

"Maybe a bit," he said, truthfully. "I've been told that I make women go crazy over me."

"Wow...you're a cocky bastard."

"All cock, no bastard," he quipped then pulled her towards her for another kiss.

This kiss was hungrier, deeper. His tongue swept into her mouth as his hand gripped her hip, pulling her closer. She moaned as his teeth grazed her bottom lip, his other hand going inside her bonnet to touch her hair. Every touch felt electric, his fingertips leaving trails of fire on her skin through the thin robe.

When he finally pulled back, they were both breathing heavily. His eyes were dark with want, that dimple appearing again as he smirked at her dazed expression.

Best. Summer. Ever, she thought hazily, already leaning in for more.

The fro-yo place bustled with early evening energy. Jules was loading his cup with toppings - chocolate syrup, Oreos, and caramel gummies.

"You like chocolate?" YN teased.

"I love chocolate," Jules said winking at her and then slowly licking syrup from his fingers in a way that made her mouth water. The sight of his tongue sliding over his skin had her mind wandering to all sorts of inappropriate places - like how that skilled tongue would feel trailing down her neck, her stomach, between her—

"YN?! Oh my God, it is you!"

She plastered on her ‘fan smile’. The teenage girl bounced excitedly while her boyfriend looked bored.

"I love your album! It's on constant repeat!"

"Unfortunately," her boyfriend muttered, earning an elbow to the stomach.

"Can I get a picture?"

"Oh, we're kinda–"

"I'll take it, bébé," Jules offered.

The girl's excited scream nearly burst YN's eardrums. "Sorry," she whispered.

Jules turned into a whole photographer — crouching down for the perfect angle, directing them to move left, then right, catching the best lighting. He even suggested different poses, making the girl giggle as he found her best side.

"Thank you so much," she gushed to Jules, then turned to YN. "You're amazing. And your boyfriend takes great pictures!"

YN choked on air while Jules just smiled, watching them leave. "That's going to blow up online," YN said after they left. "Jules, I'm so–"

"It's okay, don't stress. Let's eat our fro-yo," he said, his accent making it sound like fwo-yoh, and YN doubled over laughing.

"Am I being bullied?" he pouted.

"Boy, don't even."

"What? You're making fun of my accent. You Americans, man," he clicked his tongue, exaggerating his French accent even more.

The cashier eye-fucked Jules as he paid, her eyes trailing over his arms in his fitted tee, but he didn't spare her a glance. YN bit back a smile.

Outside, warm summer air wrapped around them as they walked toward his hotel. Groups of people crowded the outdoor seating areas of restaurants, their laughter mixing with the sounds of clinking glasses and distant music from the bars along the Rhine.

"How was your day?"

She smiled, remembering Aurélien's kisses, how his hands had mapped her skin, the way his teeth had grazed her neck... "It was fun."

"I bet it was."

"Did Auré tell you—"

"No, we don't share details. You just look... satisfied and have a dopey-ass grin on your face."

At the crosswalk, waiting among the evening crowd, she bit her lip. "So Auré and I can do different things, right? Like... sexual stuff without you?"

"Is the world free? Sky blue?"

"Don't be a dickhead."

"Yes, you can do sexual stuff with him. I thought we covered this?"

"We did, but with you two having history–"

"If you're gonna suck his dick, just gurgle mouthwash before kissing me. Fair?"

She nodded, speechless. "What about–"

"Use a condom."

"How'd you know–"

His knowing look said everything.

Jules tossed his empty fro-yo cup in the trash, then turned to her with that devastating smile. "Now, can we stop talking about my best friend and go up to my room so you can let me lick you until you cum?"

Well shit if you put it like that, her thoughts purred. Her thighs clenched at his directness.

"Uh… sure."

"YN, cherie. Yes or no?" His voice dropped lower, making her shiver.

YES YES YES! "Oui." If only Duo could see her now...

"Merci," his eyes darkened with promise.

The hotel lobby was all marble and modern art, their footsteps echoing as they headed to the elevator. The moment the doors closed, Jules had her pressed against the mirrored wall, his lips tasting of caramel and chocolate. His tongue swept into her mouth as his hands gripped her hips, pulling her closer—

Ding!

Someone cleared their throat, making her and Jules jump apart, and Aurélien stood in between the doors wearing black Nike sweats and Bottega slides.

"What's up?" Jules' voice was remarkably steady as they fist-bumped.

"Nothing much. Getting my UberEats." Aurélien's smirk was pure sin. "Have fun."

YN yelped as his hand connected with her ass when she passed him, the sound echoing in the elevator. His deep chuckle followed them down the hall.

Jules' suite was pristine — floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the city, designer clothes carefully hung in the open closet, Rimowa luggage arranged perfectly in a corner.

"Are you good?"

"You guys are so weird."

"Yeah… just a bit." His eyes dropped to her lips, darkening again. "Now, where were we?"

Before YN could even form an answer, Jules closed the distance between them, his lips claiming hers in a kiss that made her toes curl. It wasn’t just a kiss; it was a promise, one that sent heat pooling in her belly and her mind spinning. She gasped as his hands gripped her waist, and to her shock — and pleasure — he lifted her as if she weighed nothing.

Her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist as he carried her to the bed, his mouth never leaving hers. The feel of his strong arms beneath her, his body pressing against hers, made her dizzy with desire. He laid her gently on the soft mattress, hovering above her, his dreadlocks falling forward to frame his chiseled face.

Jules kissed her again, slower this time, his hands beginning their journey across her body. His fingers slid beneath the hem of her top, lifting it inch by inch until it was over her head, leaving her in just her bra. He pulled back, his eyes sweeping over her as though committing every inch of her skin to memory.

When his gaze landed on her bra, his lips quirked into a faint smile. "Take it off for me, bébé," he said, his voice a low rumble that made her shiver.

She reached behind her, fumbling with the clasp before it finally came undone. As the straps fell away, Jules’s breath hitched. Her dark, full breasts were soft and inviting, her deep brown areolas taut with arousal.

"Tu es belle," he murmured, leaning forward to press his lips to her skin. His tongue flicked over one nipple, and YN gasped, her back arching into a bow. He took it into his mouth, sucking gently, his hand kneading the other breast with firm, practiced movements. The sensation sent a jolt straight to her core, and she moaned his name, threading her fingers through his dreads to pull him closer.

Jules’s erection pressed insistently against her thigh, hard and unrelenting, but he wasn’t in a rush. He paused just long enough to coax her hips up and slid her pants down her legs, followed by her panties. Her bare pussy was exposed to him, the soft landing strip above her folds drawing his gaze.

"Mon Dieu," he murmured, his fingers lightly tracing her folds. "So pretty."

YN squirmed beneath his touch, the praise making her cheeks heat even as her arousal grew. He teased her clit with slow, deliberate circles, watching her reactions with a smug grin.

"Jules," she moaned, her voice trembling.

"I’ve got you," he assured her before stepping back to undress.

Her eyes widened as he pulled his shirt over his head, revealing sculpted abs and broad shoulders. His skin was smooth and warm-toned. When his shorts and boxers dropped, her breath caught. His erection stood proud — long, thick, and with a distinct curve, the head glistening with precum. She couldn’t help the thought that raced through her mind.

It looks so delicious.

Before she could think twice, her hands reached out to touch him, her fingers grazing his abs before wrapping around his length. Jules groaned, his head falling back as her grip tightened.

"Careful," he whispered, his voice tight with restraint. "You’re driving me insane."

Tentatively, she leaned forward, her lips brushing the tip. The salty tang of his precum met her tongue, and she whimpered, eager to please. But as she took him into her mouth, her teeth grazed him slightly, and Jules hissed.

"Watch your teeth," he said gently, his fingers threading through her hair to guide her.

She adjusted quickly, finding a rhythm as she bobbed her head along his length. Jules’s groans deepened, his hips rocking slightly in time with her movements. His taste was intoxicating, a mix of salt and musk that made her want more, even as her jaw ached from the effort.

After a moment, he pulled her back, his chest heaving. "I need you to cum first," he said, his voice rough with need.

He gently pushed her back onto the mattress, spreading her thighs as he settled between them. His mouth found her again, his tongue exploring her folds with the same precision and care he’d shown her breasts. YN’s moans grew louder, her hips bucking against his mouth as he worked her clit with steady flicks of his tongue.

His fingers joined in, slipping inside her and curling upward to find the spot that made her cry out. YN’s legs bracketed his head, her muscles trembling as the tension in her belly coiled tighter and tighter.

"Jules, I’m—"

He groaned against her, the vibration sending her over the edge. Her orgasm hit her like a wave, her body convulsing as she cried out his name. Jules didn’t stop, lapping up everything she gave him with a reverence that made her head spin.

When she finally came down, he pulled back, his lips glistening. One hand fisted his erection as the other caressed her breast, his grip tightening as his hips bucked forward. He managed to jerk off two more times then—

"YN....putain," he groaned, his release spilling onto her stomach in hot, thick streaks. The warmth made her moan softly, her body still humming from the aftermath of her climax. Jules was breathless for a moment, his eyes fixed on her as he caught his breath. Then he smiled, soft and satisfied. "Let me clean you up."

"Okay," she said, her voice low and hazy.

He padded into the bathroom, returning with a warm towel to gently clean her. His touch was careful, his gaze tender. When he was done, he tossed the towel aside and lay down beside her, pulling her close.

"Good?" he asked, his lips brushing her temple.

"Magnifique," she murmured, making him chuckle.

"Not bad," he praised.

YN sighed contentedly, her eyes fluttering closed as sleep pulled her under.

_____________________________________________

The morning sun filtered through the floor-to-ceiling windows as YN stretched, her jaw still a bit sore from getting acquainted with Jules' impressive length, her thighs tingling from his expert tongue work. Dominique was right - European men were built different. She reached for Jules but found his side empty.

"Jules?"

"Bathroom," he called back. The toilet flushed, followed by running water.

He emerged in black boxers, morning wood on display, and YN couldn't help but appreciate the view.

"You're saying I'm the freak, but it's really you," he teased.

"I get down sometimes," she shrugged.

"Oh, do you?" He leaned down to kiss her, then trailed his lips to her neck. She moaned softly before he pulled back. "As much as I would love to keep going... I have to get you back to your hotel."

Reality crashed back - Hamburg, quarterfinals against Portugal.

"Got an extra toothbrush?"

"In the drawer, chérie. The blue one's new."

While brushing her teeth, she examined his skincare arsenal: La Mer moisturizing cream, Sunday Riley UFO acne treatment, Drunk Elephant vitamin C serum, and some fancy French brand she couldn't pronounce.

How does this man have better products than me?

Back at her hotel, Jules kissed her goodbye. "Team bus leaves in an hour. See you in Hamburg?"

"Yeah... though I might hang out a bit with Aurélien."

"You should," Jules smiled against her lips. "Just meet me before the match? I'll have someone bring you to the player's area."

"Not worried?"

"About Auré? Never. About Portugal? A little."

"Promise to kick Ronaldo's ass for me."

"With pleasure, chérie." One more kiss, then he was gone.

While on the elevator to her floor, she sent a text to her other French baguette:

YN to Aurélien 🌹 Dinner in Hamburg?

Aurélien 🌹 Perfect. I can give that ass another smack 😈 Been thinking about it since last night

YN You're impossible 🙄

Aurélien You like it though 😏 I'll make it worth your while, ma belle

Rolling her eyes but smiling, YN exited the elevator, walked down to her hotel room, and began to pack for Hamburg.

This summer just kept getting better.

TO BE CONTINUED...