#well at least it came back to bite him on the ass when white made that mini microphone and mini speaker

[wolfgang1097]

In case anybody isn't aware, there's a brief backstory about a certain Spy vs. Spy short

Good evening, folks. The Spy vs. Spy short that had to do with ventriloquism from MADtv is basically another fan favorite besides Defection. Not to mention that it's also the only short where anybody has spoken a single word at all.

I will admit, I do find the raspy voices, and the incomprehensible babble, the spies were given (especially White Spy) pretty interesting and, just like the suppressed snickering they had throughout most of the shorts, it suits them very well to some degree.

I've heard rumors that the spies were probably voiced by Bryan Callen right up until he left the show right after season two. Is this true? I dunno, but it may be possible.

Anyhow, in case anybody isn't aware, this whole incident was actually provoked when Black taunted White by shouting profanities at the latter whilst he was minding his own business, as seen at the very beginning of the original paperback strip.

See?

Geesh, as much I like Black Spy and all, he can be such a huge wise-ass (I kinda did want to slug Black in the gut for straight up taunting White like that, I will admit). Well, it all came back to bite him on the ass when White retaliated by inventing a mini speaker and a mini microphone so that..well I'd see the events unfold in the video if I were you (and/or check out the original paperback strip, too; if y'all happen to have that paperback book with this strip), and the rest is history.

Hope y'all enjoyed finding out about this. Peace.

I do not claim ownership of any content. Spy vs. Spy belongs to the defunct MAD magazine and Antonio Prohias.

[cantstoptheimagines]

All Tied Up (Monkey D. Luffy, Roronoa Zoro, Usopp | One Piece)

Series Masterlist

Summary — Luffy’s dream of tying you to the main mast comes to fruition. Zoro and Usopp join the fun.

Warnings and Other Tags ➳ Another pirate smut for the collection (rough foursome; free use (human fleshlight vibes at certain points); exhibitionism (fucking on deck but no one’s around to see); oral (female receiving); penetration (vaginal); overstimulation; bondage; hair-pulling; fingering and pussy slapping; creampies and facials; spanking; degradation and name-calling; biting and licking).

Notes ➳ Word Count is 2,283. ➳ Reader uses feminine pronouns (she/her).

FAQ | Masterlist | Fandoms | Requests | Coming Soon | Schedule 

Uncontrollable pants filled your ear at the sound of skin on skin echoed in the air. Zoro’s heavy balls slapped your clit with every thrust of his hips, sinking his aching cock deep into your entrance over and over. His efforts were made simply by your position.

It was one Luffy had pleaded to see you in for weeks. In the middle of his ship’s deck, you’re bent over a wine barrel, hips digging into the wood while your legs and feet dangle weakly. Incapable of touching the wooden deck, they swung back and forth with every harsh thrust against your backside. Yours arms have been stretched out in front of you, all so your wrists could be tied to the main mast of the Sunny. The knot securing them there was formed with one of Luffy’s infamous pirate flags. 

The sight of you, according to your captain, was nothing short of delectable. And his description must have been somewhat accurate, given the eagerness in joining the fun both Zoro and Usopp had expressed when they had first wandered onto the deck that morning. And Luffy, being Luffy, was always happy to share. 

On your right, he grinned down at you while stroking his long, twitching cock, “Perfect day for this, isn’t it? Nice and clear, easy to focus our attention on using you.”

Your response is incoherent, muffled by the fabric of your underwear. Usopp, moaning intensely on your left, slapped his own leaking tip against your cheek, and spoke up, “Can’t say anything, huh? Keep quiet next time and maybe I won’t need to shove something in that pathetic mouth of yours.”

Tears welled up in your eyes. Had that really been why Usopp had forced your underwear into your mouth? Did he not like your moans? Were you being too loud this time—?

You let out another muffled gasp after Zoro gave a particularly rough thrust into your core. His large hands dug into the flesh of your ass as he huffed, “Give her a break, Usopp! It’s hard work, taking cum all day. We’ve gotta let her squeal at least a couple times. She’s earned it after letting us bend her over like this.”

One of his hands slapped your backside, drawing out one of those squeals he had just mentioned. Usopp didn’t have much time to think of a response before a wave of pleasure raked over his spine. His orgasm burst from the tip of his cock. Creamy, white ropes of his release splattered onto your face. His length twitched with every spurt. 

Once his release had subsided, Usopp smiled with a deep moan, “Damn, that was good. Bet you like all that cum on your pretty face, huh?”

“My turn! Ah! My—! My turn now!” demanded Luffy.

His hand fiercely stroked his own length, attempting to reach a quicker finish. One squeeze of his balls sent him over the edge. Another wave of cum sprayed onto your sweaty skin. Luffy’s fingers wove themselves into your hair as his other hand aimed his cock’s mushroom head at your face. His release mixed with Usopp’s, leaving white beads dribbling down your forehead and along your nose.

Behind you, Zoro let out an amused laugh. He yanked your hips, roughly dragging your tight entrance on and off his thick length. With his strength, it didn’t require much effort. His teeth filled out a feral grin, “Bet they’re gonna wish they came in your pussy more when they had you to themselves this morning. It’s mine now though, I’m taking it over. Look at ‘em, trying to get it back up.”

He was right. Both Luffy and Usopp were already stroking themselves back to life, desperate for more.

“Fuck!” grunted Zoro, his thrusts becoming more frantic. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum! Get ready, I’ve been saving this for you all day. Gonna fill up that tight womb with my cum, got it?”

He rocked you against the wine barrel, occasionally readjusting your position with a grumble whenever you got knocked out of place. The wood made your hips and pelvis ache with each of Zoro’s unyielding tugs on your body. Even now and then, you’d get a peek at your clenched toes whenever they were forced to swing forward enough. 

“Filthy little cunt, it’s always so damn tight,” he groaned, your muffled cries causing warmth to pool in his tightening abdomen. “Take it! I’m dumping everything inside, take it all! Suck in my load with your pussy, c’mon, taking my fucking cum! Oh, fuck, you little slut! Hah!”

He spread your cheeks for a better view, gritting his teeth at the sight of his cock sinking into you one last time. His balls pulsed, flush against your clit. His cum flooded your walls and painted your insides white. 

“Shit, that’s it. Take it all in there,” he muttered, slowly easing his length out of your entrance. He gripped himself with one hand and then struck the quivering head of his cock against your unused asshole. Still exposed by his other hand groping your plump flesh, your tightest entrance clenched around Zoro’s thumb when it sank inside. “Gonna ruin this one later. Need to get some energy back first.” 

He slapped your sore cheeks a few times before smearing his cum through your sensitive folds as it oozed out of your wet hole. Finally, with another few taps of his leaking cockhead, he stuffed himself back into his pants and sauntered off. 

Luffy wasted no time in taking Zoro’s place. His hips collided with your bare skin as he bottomed out inside you. His hands pressed against your lower back, forcing your spine into a deep arch as he began thrusting at a fast pace. You couldn’t help but whine through your makeshift gag.

“Zoro got you all stretched out! He’s too big for you!” he huffed angrily. “He’ll ruin you for the rest of us if he keeps stealing so many turns with your pussy. Why d’you let him do that, huh?”

“Mmph! Mmph! Mm—Mmph!” was all he got in response. Over and over, his cock sank into you, your wetness squelching out around him with each movement.

Usopp slowly stroked himself to the sight of his friend making you go cross-eyed, “That’s it, pretty thing. Enough about Zoro. You’re gonna cum on Luffy’s cock now, aren’t you?”

His words seemed to only bring Luffy closer to a release upon hearing them. You whimpered when Luffy pressed his chest against your back, restricting your movements even further. One of his hands tightly gripped onto your shoulder. Meanwhile, the other reached around your head, allowing Luffy’s large, sweaty palm to press against your forehead. He forcefully pushed your head back as he panted into your ear.

“Pretty pussy,” he muttered, only seeking the pleasure your body offered him. “My crew’s pretty, perfect pussy, all tied up. Ugh! So good, this pussy’s so good, wanna eat it.”

Still stroking himself, Usopp stepped closer, reached beneath your swaying body, and found your swollen clit, “Let me help ya out.”

“Yes, yes!” cried Luffy.

Although the feeling of Usopp attacking your clit with his fingers was almost too much for you, neither of them seemed to care. Tears welled up in your eyes while your cunt clenched around Luffy’s cock. His speed was so fast, it could be considered inhumane. He offered your pussy no relief.

Instead, he cried and huffed and whimpered into your ear upon feeling the increasing tightness of your sopping entrance. It wasn’t until Usopp struck at your aching clit, pulling your own squirting release from your cunt, that Luffy’s resolve finally broke.

He sank his length deep into your walls while his teeth suddenly dug into your temple. Rope after rope of hot cum shot into your wet cunt. All the while, Luffy’s bite shifted to your cheek and then to the side of your neck as his eyes rolled back. To anyone else, he probably looked akin to a wild animal, desperate to mark and breed its mate.

Usopp gasped, tearing his hand away from his cock before his own release could wash over him. However, he continued his assault on your overstimulated clit, grinning as you twitched and whined uncontrollably.

“What’s that?” he mocked. He then pulled your underwear out of your mouth, and chuckled, “Speak up, cutie. C’mon.”

“Please, please, ugh! Please, wait!” you cried out. A gasp fell from your lips when Luffy’s teeth released your neck, only for his tongue to repeatedly run over your sweaty skin. “Luffy, need you—hah—to slow down! Too much!”

“Almost done,” muttered Luffy, though he listened to your pleas regarding his pace, and pulled his cock out of your entrance. However, it was quickly replaced with his tongue when he knelt behind you, and said, “Still wanna eat.”

Usopp groped your ass, spreading your cheeks for Luffy, who gripped your shaking thighs. His long tongue ran over your folds once, then twice, before it sank into you.

Usopp teased your asshole, much like Zoro had done earlier when he was still on deck, while Luffy took a deep whiff of your arousal. Your captain’s mouth explored your wetness carelessly, panting and slurping. His release from just moments ago, now mixed with your own, dripped into his awaiting mouth. He let out a series of satisfied groans, sinking his nails deep into the soft flesh of your thighs.

“Pussy tastes—yes—so good! Need it! Don’t squirm too much! Put it back in my mouth, c’mon, your clit! There you go! Mmph! Yes, yes!”

“Cum again,” ordered Usopp. “Cum on his tongue so I can put my dick in you already, c’mon!”

Your vision blurs as another orgasm washes over your body. You hardly realize it when Luffy gets in one last lick before he walks away with a satisfied grin, his softening cock swinging between his legs with every step. He toyed with his balls while making his way to the kitchen.

“My chance with you now, pretty thing,” muttered Usopp, disappearing from your sight to take his place behind you. “Talk to me. You still feel good?”

Every part of you lies still, your limbs weak. You’re panting uncontrollably, trying to catch your breath from your time with Luffy. You can only hum in response to his question. Quietly, Usopp laughed from behind you, and you can’t help but shudder when a warm hand runs over your spine.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he said, only to groan when he took a glance at your soaked folds. “Those two always fuck you up, huh? I think you can take another round though.” 

Usopp abruptly shoved into you, stretching you even further. You can’t stop a loud, surprised cry from escaping your lips. One of his hands wrapped itself in your hair while the other reached around to grasp your throat. He quickly yanks your head as far back as he can manage. Your back is arched at an almost impossible angle, not that he seemed to care.

Hunching over you, Usopp cursed and immediately set a quick, unforgiving pace with his thrusts. He resists the urge to choke you every time your throat pulses beneath his palm with a new plea for him to slow down. Instead, he leans over you enough to lick the sweat that beads on your temple. 

“Ours, ours,” he groaned. “Pussy’s ours. Wanna fill you up and leave you tied up for everyone to see. Want every ship passing by to know whose cum is dripping outta your guts.”

“Usopp, ugh!” you whined, gasping each time his hips smacked your aching backside. “Please! Can’t do it again!”

“Can’t do what, huh? Cum?” he chuckled with a deep huff. “You don’t need to worry about it—fuck, baby! I’m taking care of that for ya. Yeah, I’ll make you cum again, just as soon as I’m through with this pussy of yours, m’kay?”

Your eyes squeezed shut and you were unable to do anything but pant and whine as Usopp had his way with you. He hissed into your ear, occasionally licking your skin, as he dug his nose into your temple.

With his eyes rolled back and his teeth clenched, Usopp's hips become a blur. His thrusts are so quick, so rough, that you’re beginning to experience whiplash.

“Gonna do it, fuck!” he panted. “I’m gonna cum in this cute, little pussy! You do it with me, okay? You hear me? I’m going to make you cum!”

One hand forces your head down against the barrel while the other dives between your legs to torture your aching clit. Usopp is practically drooling with pleasure as your release finally overtakes his pulsing cock.

He slaps your clit a few times as you orgasm with a loud cry. He pounds into you harder and harder until he’s flooding your insides with his own release. With thick, white cum frothing out onto his balls, he grunts and pants into your ear, still occasionally licking your sweaty flesh.

He doesn’t pull out until his cock is soft and unable to continue with another round. Not for lack of trying, however. Usopp does his best to stroke himself back to life, slapping his throbbing tip against your twitching asshole upon spreading you open with a large palm, but it’s all to no avail.

Realizing he’s unfortunately spent, he finally gives up on stroking his overstimulated, twitching cock. He runs his fingers through your folds instead, admiring the excessive amount of cum that oozes and drips out of your used body.

“Get some rest,” he said, slapping your backside one last time. “I think Sanji’s got something special planned for you later.”

[n3ptoonz]

'Make It Quick'

Pairing: Sam Wilson/F!Reader

Fandom: MCU

Warnings/tags: Smut; Explicit, dialogue heavy; minor argument, Bucky mentioned, reader is Sam's fiancée, reader got a lil southern in her, cunnilingus, door/wall sex, quickie with a hottie (shout out the sims 4), babe baby and honey used, 3/4 proofread, i had too much fun writing the dialogue

Word count: 1.9k+

Naturally, Sam let Bucky crash at his place. Well, his shared place with you, his fiancée. Bucky had heard a lot about you, but didn't get to meet you yesterday when they were working on the boat. However, Sam wasn't entirely sure if you'd approve, which made it slip his mind to just tell you Bucky's staying with you two for a few weeks until he's is on call again.

You came down the steps, rubbing the morning crust from the corner of your eye in your open robe and sleep scarf. You walked into the living room while stretching your arms before stopping mid-step to Bucky sitting on the couch, mid-bite into what looked like breakfast from a fast food restaurant. You brought your robe together as he quickly looked away, letting you leave at least without being completely embarrassed. He just saw you in a tank top and underwear!

When you went back to the steps, there Sam was with a "I fucked up" expression on his face while he was coming down, forgetting to warn you before you left the bedroom.

All you did was give him a 'care to explain?' look with your arms folded. You were definitely not happy, and very much embarrassed at what just happened in the span of two minutes.

"I was gonna tell you..." he said with his hands up to placate you.

"And just when were you planning to do that?" you asked in a hushed yell. "Before or after your best friend almost saw my nipples?"

Sam sighed and descended to the bottom of the stairs, putting his hands on your shoulders. "Okay, I'm sorry." he said softly. "It slipped my mind and I didn't want this to be a big thing. I didn't think you'd mind him being here."

You blinked at him and pinched the bridge of your nose. "It's like you didn't hear what I just said."

"Nah, I heard you." he lightly teased and let his hands fall to his sides. "I just don't think it's that bad."

"Sam, you know I don't usually walk around fully clothed."

"Yeah, but it's not like you're butt ass naked."

"I may as well have been!"

"Babe, honey, you're acting like he hasn't seen a woman's body before. It's not that serious."

"Sam." you warned. "Your best friend just saw your fiancée in her underwear, and that's what you have to say? You think I care that he's seen a woman before? What that gotta do with me?"

"Hey, hey, listen. I know you're embarrassed, and I feel bad that I didn't tell you beforehand. But you gotta relax because right now, you're making a big deal out of something that isn't. He just saw you in some underwear. Accidentally. I wouldn't trip about this."

"Well, I am! That's not normal!" you replied, "And this is his first impression of me. In a sleep scarf and panties. I don't go around inviting people over with the chance of them seeing your junk."

"Oh my goodness- baby, he's probably not even thinking about those soft, supple thighs of yours anymore." he remarked with a small chuckle.

You narrowed your eyes, not finding that bit funny at all. "It's not just the lack of clothes. You even had him sleeping on the couch when we have a whole ass guest room. Why are you acting without thinking? And without talking to me first?"

"Look- we were both tired yesterday and I didn't think the details mattered. If I knew it was gonna upset you this much, I would've told you. But what's done is done. Just...go get dressed, alright? You can worry about your first impression after you put some clothes on."

Your brow raised as you looked at him. You reopened your robe in front of him, hands on your hips. "Oh, I think I'll be just fine like this. He's already seen half the package anyway," you said, gesturing to the white tank top that was form fitting, another reason you reacted like this. "You're tidying up that guest room and getting your boy off of our nice couch. You know better."

Sam let out a low whistle, almost missing what you said entirely. "I, uh...Damn." he said while looking at you in your glory.

Okay, maybe your reaction was completely valid.

"Yeah I can um, I can do that. Just- hey, look, now, I still need you to put some normal clothes on. Don't need you getting his attention."

"Too late for that now." you closed your robe back up securely and went back into the living room. "Mornin', Bucky," you said as you passed him and walked right into the kitchen. He cleared his throat and gave a short wave.

"Uh, morning." he said, quieter than he intended. But it was almost impossible not to. He overheard maybe a quarter of the conversation and started to feel a little bad. He stood up from the couch to stretch, and to rid himself of the awkwardness plaguing him.

"You sleep alright? Sam was just about to tidy up the guest room for you." you called out from the kitchen as you gathered ingredients and materials to make breakfast with. Sam huffed and started grabbing some cleaning supplies from the hall closet.

"Yeah, I slept alright, thanks," he nodded. "I've slept on worse than a couch, believe me."

He watched as you started preparing food, then looked over to Sam, who was currently moving stuff from the closet to a table, presumably to clean up the space. "Are you sure it's alright for me to stay? I could just go to a motel."

"No, no, it's all good. Even if I wanted to smack my lovely fiancée upside the head, I still have no problem offering some good ole southern hospitality to someone he clearly holds dear. I don't have a problem with you being here, really." you said with a smile.

Bucky nodded and smiled back a bit, not expecting you to be so relaxed and cool with the whole situation after what went down a minute ago.

"Thank you," he said, as Sam came back from the back room, looking a bit tired.

"Yeah, don't even worry about it," Sam patted him on the back as he went over to the kitchen entrance. "Hey, can we talk for a second?"

You looked up from the food splayed out on the counter at Sam and walked past him out of the kitchen. Glancing at Bucky, you gestured vaguely towards the kitchen. "Don't hesitate to get started on something if you feel like it." you said. He gave a thumbs up, watching you two walk back out of the living room and heard your steps ascending up the stairs.

"What was all that?" Sam asked while shutting the door behind him. "You trying to show off for company now, huh? What, cause I said it wasn't that deep?"

You didn't respond as you undid your robe, letting it fall to the floor. He watched you with suspicion and crossed his arms.

"I don't know what you mean," you said with a fake thoughtful expression. "I was listening to what you said. It's not that deep, so, I didn't change." you added with a shrug, the force of your shrug making your breasts bounce for a split second. Sam's mouth went dry the second in happened.

What was he mad about again?

He took a deep breath and took a step towards you. His hands naturally rested on your hips whenever he wanted to talk to you, your name falling from his lips like a spell.

"I don't wanna fight about this," he said, "How about we both change clothes, hm?"

You couldn't help but stare at him with adoration as you placed your hands on his broad chest.

"Yeah, I don't really care about the clothes anymore." you said with a simple kiss to his lips. Hoping he'll get the implication.

And boy did he get it.

Sam looked down at you and pulled you flush to his chest. "We have a guest downstairs." he murmured and idly traced shapes on your side. You just shrugged and said,

"So we'll be quick. And quiet." you put a finger to your lips and whispered. When Sam heard your hushed giggles he shook his head gave you another kiss before backing you up against the door. He got to his knees and started kissing up your body, starting at the top of your foot. If it's one thing Sam is, he's a giver. A mighty good one too.

As he kept on, he inched your underwear down your thighs and down your legs until they were discarded to the floor. He kissed up your knee while his free hand caressed the other leg. When he reached the top of your thigh, he tapped it to signal you to put that leg over his shoulder.

Your head softly hit the door as he went down on you, toes curling already. It didn't help that his beard tickled your inner thighs but it never bothered you.

"Sam," you breathed out as your hand was already resting on the back of his head to push him closer. Your next thought couldn't be completed as he took your silent plea to heart, eating you out faster with a wide smile against your skin.

The leg you were standing on nearly gave out as you struggled to focus; struggled to keep quiet, but damn it was the man working you like you were about to get caught by a teacher.

"I think I'm gonna-" you inhaled shortly after cutting yourself off, a hand coming to cover your mouth. But it wasn't your hand. Your eyes opened to see him standing in front of you and holding his index finger to his lips.

"Turn around." he whispered. You quickly did so and pressed your chest against the door. Now was the real challenge: not making it abundantly obvious you two were fucking on the door.

His hand remained over your mouth as he slid on in, a soft whimper quieted by his palm. He exhaled after he was completely sheathed inside you.

"I'mma make this quick, baby. I promise." he muttered next to your ear and started thrusting at a very steady pace. You had both hands on the door so it would lessen the chance of it making noise.

Sam was no liar. He fully intended to ride out the high as quick as possible and it was working. He didn't need to go super fast and super hard. He knew the exact angle he had to be at the repeatedly hit that spot that always left you breathless no matter what.

You mewled quietly over and over again. Clenched against him as if you wanted to prolong it. Wanted to keep this up for as long as you could--and he could feel it. Every last bit of it.

"C'mon," he whispered and wrapped an arm around you to keep you in place. "You can do it. Can't keep our guest waitin'."

Your body stiffened as you released. Your essence streaming down your leg and some onto his thighs. He let you ride out your climax but he didn't stop. Not until he got some too.

Luckily, it wasn't too long after that he was right behind you. His hips connected to your ass as he slumped over, groaning softly in your ear while pumping you full. You removed his hand so you could breathe. Your forehead resting on the cool painted wood while catching your breath. Sam pulled out slowly and kissed your shoulders, rubbing your biceps to soothe you.

"Let's go get changed."

[the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf]

God made girls lethal, when he made monsters of men.

Jonathan Crane x psycho!reader PART TWO

PART ONE

warnings - blood, gore, attempted sexual assault, death.

Masterlist

REQUESTS OPEN - request here

*************************

You’re sessions with Jonathan began to dwindle. No matter how much you screamed, bit, scratched and attacked the other shrinks, demanding to see Jonathan, no one would let you. Always claiming that he had other patients he deemed more severe.

“BULLSHIT!” You screamed. If he wanted dangerous, boy, was he gonna get dangerous.

That was how Jonathan Crane sauntered down the hall and into your cell where he saw you, straight jacket on, strapped down to a wooden chair, held by three guards. Your smile dribbled blood out of your red mouth.

“There are easier ways to get my attention than biting off a guy’s ear.” He sounded almost bored and this made you whimper.

“Well they clearly weren’t working as I asked for you a million times and you NEVER CAME!” Your voice rose into a shrill scream for the last words. But he didn’t even flinch. Instead he kneeled down in front of your shaking form and stroked your soft cheek.

“Now, now darling. There, there. I haven’t been a very good psychiatrist have I?”

“No.” You softly whimpered out.

“No. I’ve been neglecting you haven’t I?" He cooed. Your body softened at his caring words. You meekly nodded.

The guards around you were confused but one sharp glare from Jonathan shut them up and they daren’t look at your intimate moment any longer.

From then on, Jonathan allowed the two of you to have weekly meetings. But they weren’t designed to analyse you, but rather to court you.

He would come and sit down with you and you would talk for hours. About movies, books, games etc.

Some days he would bring you little treats. Secret chocolates, a teddy bear. One day he even brought a hairbrush and he sat behind you and the whole session consisted of him lightly brushing out the tangled locks of your unkept mane. No words were said. But it was ecstacy.

Your favourite gift was when he presented you with a white rose.

“What are those red splotches?” You enquired looking at the streaks which littered the pure base.

“You see I cut myself on the thorn and some dropped on the rose. I was going to get you a new one but I couldn’t help but be so intrigued by it. It really adds something, don’t you think?”

In lieu of a reply you merely reached forward and grabbed his hand where you could see the healing scar. Without breaking his gaze you leant forward and took the whole finger into your mouth. Jonathan struggled to hold back a moan as you salivated at the still iron taste.

In his time with you, Jonathan had noted the keen interest some of the male guards had in you. He sometimes laughed it off believing their stupidity knew no bounds if they were willing to take you on. But he couldn’t help but worry for you.

“God I wouldn’t mind taking a bit of that ass.”

“Are you serious dude? That bitch is crazy. Proper stone cold psychopath.”

“Don’t worry, she’s being sedated well enough, or at least she will be soon. She won’t give us any problems.”

Jonathan overheard the guards from the outside of the break room door.

Since meeting you he had become enraptured. Enchanted by your very being. He viewed you as the most sacred relic he could ever dare to possess. He knew your strength was unimaginable. But you were his. And no one messed with his Queen.

One day you were being transported from your session with Jonathan, who had now deemed it fit to have the sessions in his office rather than your cell. The two guards, who flanked your sides, spoke over you in silent code. Once they had deemed the corridor completely empty. They grabbed your sides, still held in the straight jacket, and began to drag you towards an abandoned closet. Taking your pants and underwear off on the way. Their intentions clearly immoral.

It took you by such surprise that you barely had time to react. You were not used to being manhandled but the shock of the moment meant you couldn’t clear your head enough to launch a good enough attack.

Before the three of you were over the doors precipice, a loud voice announced their exit from their office.

Jonathan called out to ask the two men a question, to which they responded after manoeuvring you out of a compromising position. He shot you a single glance before explaining how he would prefer to walk you back to your cell as well, as, in his words,

“I don’t want her to give you any problems.” with a knowing glint in his eye.

That night the two same guards were summoned to your cell.

They stood to the side of where you sat slumped in your chair. The previous encounter had scarred you and weakened your own sense of self. They were just men, you had killed them before. Why was it so hard now. What was this weak feeling and why did it make you want to scream.

However, your self-sabotaging thoughts were halted the minute Jonathan’s lean frame entered. His soft smile landed on your frame which appeared to have shrunk in the presence of the two guards. This lit a fire deep within his heart.

He brought his briefcase up to the table and popped it open. He pulled out a macabre clown mask, decorated with black and red. He walked forward, whistling as he went, and placed it on your face. You were unable to resist, but deep down you didn’t want to. You trusted Jonathan.

He returned to his briefcase, sat down, took off his glasses, and looked deep into your eyes.

“Would you like to see my mask.” He condescendingly teased.

He pulled out a ratty burlap sack which you noted had stitching which resembled a face. He placed it on his head and immediately pressed a hidden button which released a sulphuric green gas into the air. It was then you noted the breathing device attached to your own mask.

Jonathan bared his knuckles on the table and used it to raise himself into a godlike stance.

You were startled by the bloodcurdling screams which erupted from the two men behind you. You whipped around to see them collapse to the floor, writhing about in pain. Both looking and pointing up at Jonathan in pure god-fearing terror.

Suddenly, they both seized. Their last moments of fear etched onto their faces like stone. Their hearts had gone.

You tilted your head to look down, interestedly, at the two corpses. You turned back around when you felt a presence at your back.

Jonathan stood over you, masked and all. His hand outreached.

“Scarecrow will never hurt you, my love.”

You carefully lifted up your own mask to reveal a teeth-chattering grin plastered over your sadistic expression.

*************************

PART THREE

taglist: @jonsncws @h-l-vlovesvintage @theethy @fashionki11a @felicity1994 @bearchermer @idkyoutellmesmh @mimimarvelingmarvel @butterfly-lies-chase-them-away @neotanpopper @deliriouslybi @folklorde24 @thefandomdiaries07 @viarosemcmissile @noirrose21-blog @thepoeticfirefly @xoxo-gothic-girl @skeletonwrite @jellyzelek @kaylamarie306-blog @bloodcanbehot @lazybot @raineeace @thearieunhinged @multifans-things @queenofterrasen418 @bey0ndne0 @justanotherkpopstanlol @iamliterallyspidergwen @frozenhuntress67 @alice2612 @slut4thebroken @akiratoro420 @astheni-a

[zepskies]

Okay, I loved the reader smacking Ben's ass, so can we do an uno reverse of the situation, but lmao it would probably not end well because knowing Ben it probably would've been done during a terribly inappropriate time like a meeting or something, also I know that you didn't explicitly say it was BMD ben and reader but I did read it as such, lmao - salvadoreña anon (lmao it feels a little weird to call myself that because Im also desi lol)

Hello my Latina Lovely! 😘 (Wow! Love that you're also Desi. ❤️)

Aw, hell, you done uno-reversed me…

See this imagine for context: Repaying Soldier Boy for a job well done.

(And yes, I had Break Me Down-verse SB x Reader in my head writing that one as well lol. They're ingrained in me. 😂)

Word Count: 350

Imagine: Ben gets a little payback.  

Your heels clacked on the tile floor brusquely as you made your way back to your office, over in Surveillance. You carried a stack of paperwork that had to be sorted through—and on Grace Mallory’s desk by end of day today.

Your hair was falling out of its loosening bun, and you tried in vain to blow a piece of it out of your face. The elevator on the opposite end of the hall dinged. The doors opened, and out came your boyfriend, strutting into the hall in his supe suit.

You smiled. “Wow, that was quick. You caught Metallo?”

“Being booked with bendy straws for arms as we speak,” Ben replied with a cocky smile. He headed toward you down the hall. “Gonna grab a bite to eat. Care to join?”

You raised a brow at bendy straws for arms. He really needed to work on how badly he roughed up these supes when bringing them into custody.

“Can’t right now,” you said, gesturing with your eyes to your workload. “But I’ll let you know when I’m ready to head home, if you want to wait for me.”

While you spoke, Ben was busy taking in your white blouse, the dark red lipstick, the pencil skirt, the sexy little heels. It was straight out of one of his fantasies…

Maybe you’d be down for a round of sexcretary after work. His lips curved at the thought.

But then, he remembered how you’d got him to accidentally shatter a nice crystal wine glass the other night, and it got him contemplating some retribution.

“All right. See you then, baby doll,” he said mildly.

When he finally reached you, he gave you a nice smack on the ass as he passed by.

You jolted with a wide-eyed yelp. Ben smirked at the sound.

He’d gotten you with a little more force than he thought though, as it made you lose your grip on your files. They flew from your hands and scattered onto the floor.

You twisted back to meet him with a glare. Ben’s hand clenched and curled back…

Then he gave you a sly grin.

“Payback’s a bitch, ain’t it?”  

AN: So I don't typically post two new fics within the same day (sorry for the spam), but this one was short and essentially a sequel to the other imagine lol. (And my weird brain doesn't like a packed drafts folder. 😉)

I have at least one more SB imagine coming this week. I got a ton of requests this weekend, so thank you all! I really am so flattered. 🥰🥰

Soldier Boy Masterlist

Main Masterlist

SB Tag List:

@melancholictearz @katherineann83 @sleepyqueerenergy @wayward-lost-and-never-found @tipthejar @ajjustice @thewritersaddictions @samanddeaninatrenchcoat @deanwanddamons @antisocialcorrupt @adoringanakin @theonlymaninthesky @teehxk @midnightmadwoman

@mrshalverson2021 @iprobablyshipit91 @agalliasi @venicesem @waters-2567 @deans-spinster-witch @chriszgirl92 @lyarr24 @ladysparkles78 @solariklees @xsophianicolex @deansbbyx @mimaria420 @candy-coated-misery0731 @curlycarley @sarahgracej @bagpussjocken @ultrahviolentart @skyesthebomb @this-is-me19 @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore

@agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesdeanvessel @foxyjwls007 @wincastifer @emily-winchester @tearsfortheyouth @solo-pitstop-vibes @romaka344 @dope-trope-105 @liuope @beautyvaliant @xxlaynaxx @ades106 @chernayawidow @beskarfilms

[yukidragon]

Sunshine in Hell - Shaun's Cat Family

You know, after my last post, I got to thinking that Shaun definitely grew up in a house with cats. I have no doubts Leticia would've gotten herself at least one black cat to complete her witchy ensemble at some point, and Antwon is definitely a cat guy.

Baby Moon Pie might be Shaun's first furbaby, but he had himself a fair amount of fursiblings over the years. They may or may not be referenced in Sunshine in Hell, but it brought a smile to my face coming up with a few furry family members for Shaun. I figured someone else might find my funny feline indulgence entertaining as well, so I decided to make it into a ramble.

Yes, this is just a blatant excuse to play around with cat ideas and characters. I make no apologies for my undying love of cute kitties.

Duchess Dahlia Briar Binx the Second was the first in her line to greet Shaun upon his grand arrival, as he was born long after Duchess Dahlia Briar Binx the First sadly passed. She was an elegant, classy lady who upheld her title with grace. She was patient with baby Shaun and even treated him like her own kitten, often grooming him when they snuggled. Though she wasn't able to keep up with his high energy most of the time once he started walking.

Duchess Dahlia Briar Binx the Third arrived years later around when Shaun was in his teens. She didn't try to match the class and grace of her predecessor bestowed with the honored title, but she left a mark with her spunk and attitude. Despite being a tripod with only one back leg, she loved to show off her excellent sense of balance by perching high on ledges no one thought she could reach.

Her favorite game to play with Shaun was fetch, and no matter what sort of tricky throw he tried to stump her with, she always managed to retrieve whatever he tossed away, even if he didn't necessarily mean for her to bring it back. It was often a challenge trying to throw away peanut butter cup wrappers with this cunning duchess always on the prowl for a good game.

Ichabod was a sphinx with a few funny quirks. He was around during Shaun's young childhood to young adulthood. He claimed one of Shaun's beloved childhood stuffed animals as his own and would often walk around the house holding it in his mouth while making muffled meows. He would often spontaneously get the zoomies, scampering away for no reason known to anyone but him.

Ichabod got the affectionate nickname of "Thing" by Antwon due to his lack of fur and kooky personality reminding Antwon of the disembodied hand from the Adams Family. Shaun being young and just starting to read, mistook the reference his dad was making. This led to him calling Ichabod "Thing 1" and Duchess Dahlia Briar Binx the Second "Thing 2."

Fortunately the Duchess was in good humor about the association and allowed Shaun the Seuss-inspired nickname. Though she never deigned to answer to it, or to any name really.

Commander Salem came along around when Shaun was in elementary school. He was a bit more standoffish, but a fighter who lived up to his bestowed rank. He was formerly a fully black cat who earned his white streaks and patches through surviving three brushes with cancer and kicking its ass each time. He terrorized any stray or intruder that dared to come too close to his home or family.

When one of the neighbors decided to let their dog run wild, Commander Salem ran it off when it invaded their yard and tried to bite young Shaun. Antwon and Lecitia made sure to reward the commander with extra treats that night for his bravery, and Shaun made him a little gold medal with crayons and construction paper. The medal, sadly, didn't survive too long, as the commander also had a habit of chewing on paper and cardboard.

Gossamer, a chubby and lazy white cat with some gray blotches, earned himself the most nicknames of all the cats, which was a feat in and of itself. Gossy, Glossy, Goose, Goosey, Goosey Loosey, Golly Gosh, God Damn Unit, and Popcorn Paws were just a few of such titles bestowed upon this messy boy. While all of the cats earned a silly nickname or two, none could match his impressive collection of titles.

When Gossamer was not being lazy, he was living up to his nickname of Goose by being quite the terror. On many a lovely day, he could be quite a terrible Goose. (Yes, I had to throw in an Untitled Goose Game reference with that nickname.) Most messes in the house were the result of him getting his sticky popcorn paws into food he wasn't supposed to be eating or shoving stuff off of ledges to make room for him to sprawl.

Sadly, much like Shaun's human family, most of his feline family members are no longer around in the present day, though they all lived long and happy lives with him and his parents.

After Antwon and Leticia passed, their surviving furbabies went to family friends to take care of. Shaun would have taken in his furry siblings if he had the means to do so, but he was a broke college student at the time.

Duchess Dahlia Briar Binx the Third is the last of Shaun's fuzzy siblings alive and kicking in the present day. Shaun debated for the longest time if he should request her current owners give her back to him once he was settled into his own place. In the end, couldn't bring himself to uproot her life again during her golden years when she had bonded with her new family and new home.

Fortunately the duchess' owners servants allow Shaun to visit her whenever he wants for snuggles and a game of fetch or two. Being such close friends of Leticia and Antwon for many years before their passing, they also make sure to share a new story or two about them that Shaun hasn't heard yet. The visits are a bit bittersweet, but they remind Shaun of his life before the accident and help him feel just that little bit closer to his late parents.

Shaun also made sure to introduce Duchess Dahlia Briar Binx the Third to her new little niece, Moon Pie. After a bit of raised hackles and cautious sniffs, the duchess graciously approved of the new addition to their family. Moon Pie warmed up to the duchess immediately, and it wasn't long before they were snuggling together during their first visit.

On that cute note, I think I'll wrap things up here, as that's about all the cat character ideas I have. For now. Maybe I'll have the urge to give Moon Pie a sibling sometime, or at least a friend or two. I know I want to give Alice at least one kitten eventually.

I hope you enjoyed this silly little self-indulgent post about getting to know some of Shaun's funny feline family!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur @kurokrisps

[tobysbliss]

helping the pain

lee!revivedbur, ler!tommy

summary: wilbur has always experienced back pain, but ever since his revival it’s gotten worse. tommy decides to try and help with that.. but of course, it derailed— not exactly in a bad way.

word count: 1,278

this was supposed to be a tickletober fic, i’d never finisbed it until now. and of course, we have to end the year off with some crimeboys tickles. :]

this is officially my LAST fic of 2023! enjoy🤍

During L’manberg times, Wilbur was known for overworking himself.

He did it very often, too often. It was concerning, and many people worried for him. But he didn’t care; it was important work that NEEDED done! He couldn’t just take breaks.

Well, now, all of that came back to bite him in the ass.. Or, more like in the back. Because he always kept such terrible posture with how much he was in the chair, and all he had in limbo was concrete floor and walls?

He came back to life with a shit load of back / shoulder pain and problems.

And there was one person who fell victim to his complaining over it.

Tommyinnit.

Wilbur had a tendency to complain about his back or shoulders hurting when he was around Tommy. He’d attempt to stretch—never ended very well. It just hurt. He did often crack his back, while it did help for about five seconds, the pain would come back not long after.

He was currently with Tommy, which his shoulders were absolutely killing him, by the way. He made an attempt to stretch his arms out to help, before Tommy spoke up.

“You do realize that won’t help, right? Same with cracking your back, you do it too much. You’ll just worsen it.” Tommy spoke flatly as he looked up at Wilbur, setting down a flower he previously held to push his white streak of hair out of his face. Seeing Tommy do this made Wilbur do the same with his own.

“I haven’t got any other options, do I?” Wilbur rolled his eyes. “It’s not my fault.”

“Well.. It is, though. We did tell you, you should have stopped overworking yourself. Or to at least fix your posture; God, that was awful. And it still is! You do not learn, do you?” Tommy was lecturing Wilbur now, which only made the brunette place a finger to Tommy’s lips.

“Shut up, child. I don’t need a lecture from you.” Wilbur glared at Tommy, who just shoved his hand away.

“Okay, well, constantly cracking your back or doing.. whatever that was, isn’t gonna help it. Do you want me to help, or something?” Tommy placed a hand on Wilbur’s back, as if he were comforting him.

“Nothing will help it, I’m sure this has to be permanent by now.” Wilbur’s tone remained monotone, he sounded annoyed in a way. Stressed?

“Uhh..” Tommy thought for a moment. “Would a massage help..? It would at least relax you a little bit.” He offered, but even he sounded unsure.

The suggestion made Wilbur pause; he hadn’t been given a massage in… Well, he didn’t even know how long.

“Maybe? I don’t know..” Wilbur ran his hands down his face, a deep sigh escaping past his lips. This seemed to be bothering him more than Tommy thought.

“Alright- uhm.. Let me just..” Tommy moved from his current position, and sat on his knees behind Wilbur. He gently placed his hands on Wilbur’s shoulders; Wilbur tensed up almost immediately.

“Fuckin’ hell, man,” Tommy muttered under his breath, it was really all he had to say.

“Don’t judge me.” Wilbur rolled his eyes, tensing again as Tommy began massaging the area around his shoulders. Isn’t this supposed to make him do the opposite?

“I’m judging you.”

“Fuck you.”

“Hey, I’m trying to help you, don’t be a dick!” Tommy poked Wilbur in the dead center of his spine, grinning as the man arched forward with a soft squeak. He went back to massaging Wilbur’s shoulders, being as gentle but firm as he could.

After a few minutes, Wilbur finally relaxed a little. This made Tommy smile. He moved his hands a little closer to Wilbur’s neck, his thumbs firmly rubbing the spot in small circles.

Wilbur immediately tensed again, reaching his hands back to grab onto Tommy’s and stop him. Tommy smirked knowingly.

“Really? You can’t even handle a little massage?” He teased, freeing his hands from Wilbur’s hold with ease.

“Shut up, you fucking bitch!” Wilbur smacked Tommy’s hand.

Tommy placed his hands back near the crook of his neck, smirking when Wilbur flinched.

“Tommy, don’t even think abOUT IT!” Wilbur’s voice cracked when Tommy very, very lightly dragged a single finger down the back of his neck. A shiver went down his spine, he was quick to grab onto Tommy’s hand again. This didn’t stop the teen, absolutely not.

“I’m thinking about it. Wanna be a dick again?” Tommy placed his hands back on Wilbur’s shoulders.

“No! No.. Just- Continue, please?” Wilbur sighed, relaxing his shoulders.

“Hmm. Apologize first.” This sentence made Wilbur immediately turn himself around to face Tommy.

“Apologize!?” Wilbur sputtered. “No, I didn’t even do anything! What have I got to apologize for?”

“You told me to shut up, you called me a bitch, and you hit me! Apologize!” Tommy complained as he crossed his arms. Wilbur rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you deserved that. I’m not apologizing.” The look on Wilbur’s face became smug, as Tommy’s fell into a blank stare.

“Hm. Alright then.” Tommy hummed, and didn’t say a word as he latched his hands onto the sides of Wilbur’s ribs, digging his fingers on the spaces between the bones.

He couldn’t help but smile as Wilbur went from being smug and cocky, to panicked and shrieking of laughter.

“You going to apologize?” Tommy moved his hands up, vibrating his fingers under Wilbur’s arms as the man fell to the ground helplessly.

“NOHOHO!” Wilbur pressed his arms against his sides in an attempt to evade Tommy’s stupid, horrible, evil tickling.

“No? Okay.” Tommy easily turned Wilbur over and pinned him down, making him stuck laying on his stomach. Tommy’s hands found their way to the backs of Wilbur’s ribs, and he dug his fingers onto the spot. Wilbur screamed, immediately reaching behind himself to stop Tommy, but finding it to be quite difficult.

Tommy really couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Wilbur like this, a helpless mess of giggles and shrieks. It was adorable.

“How about now? You gonna give up?” The teen kept his teasing tone. It pissed Wilbur off how easily flustered his little brother could make him.

“NOHOHO!” Wilbur was now screaming in laughter, barely being able to muster up any words aside from “FUHUHUCK!” and “NOHOHO!”

“Apologize!” Tommy nagged, clawing his hands up and down Wilbur’s ribs. He even shot one hand up to vibrate on the man’s underarm..

That’s what did it for Wilbur.

“OkaHAHAHAY! I’M SORRY! PLEHEHEASE!” Wilbur pleaded, and Tommy immediately stopped and moved back a little. Wilbur melted against the ground, greedily taking in big gulps of air as he tried to compose himself.

Tommy placed a comforting hand on Wilbur’s shoulder, frowning a little at the way the man tensed.

“I’m done, Wil. I promise,” Tommy’s tone flipped around entirely, switching from teasy and a little pestering, to sweet and reassuring. This relaxed Wilbur.. He hadn’t felt relaxed in a long time.

And Tommy is the one who helped him.

Tommy.

Wilbur took a deep breath and looked up at Tommy. He was quiet as he spoke, “thank you.”

Tommy blinked, then smiled fondly. “You’re welcome.” He looked down at Wilbur.

“..Do you want to get off the grOUND-“ Tommy yelped through his words as he was suddenly pulled down to the ground by Wilbur. Tommy rolled his eyes as Wilbur wrapped his arms around the blonde’s torso, cuddling him close. This wasn’t like Wilbur, at all. But Tommy wasn’t gonna complain about it.

“..You know we can’t just lie here on the ground, right?” “Yes we can.”

“…Alright then.”

A/N: Honestly I cannot believe 2023 is about to be over. Time flies.. a little too much. I just wanted to say that I am incredibly grateful for all of the support I have received this year, and for the friends I’ve made and the friends who have stayed with me throughout everything. I love y’all, thanks so much. Happy New Year 🫶❤️

[inanimatetffantasies]

Roommates make good socks

Based on a old rp i did with @justcockyideas

Jason sighed contently as he pulled up his new sock, the clean new white cotton being snug and fit onto his large size 15 foot. He had just gotten through with telling one of his flatmates that he was going to have to kick him out, and he thinks that conversation went veeery nicely. He let out a chuckle as he flexed his foot, watching the cotton conform to the will of his toes, before suddenly hearing the front door open.

“Hey Corey! Can you come in here man” He said, remembering he had to talk to his other flatmate about moving out too. Corey put his bag down, glad to be home at last. He wondered where his roommate Chris was, he was usually gaming on the sofa at this time. When he heard his other roommate call him in, he shrugged it off and went to see what Jason needed.

“Yoooo Corey" Jason said with a grin as he beckoned Corey closer into the room. “Come on in here man, I gotta talk to you, don’t be nervous I ain't gonna bite” The bearded roomie said with a chuckle, his legs spread out across the floor.

As Corey walked in, he raised a eyebrow, noticing Jason was only wearing one almost pristine sock, like it was only just being worn for the first time. Quickly, though, his focus shifted to his roommates spread legs. Corey always did have a crush on his roommate, even with Jason's annoying frat bro attitude. He tried to divert his attention to talking to his roommate and sat down on the chair beside Jason's bed. "Hey Man, What did you want to talk about?"

“Come on, man, come a little closer” Jason said as he wrapped his arm around his roommates neck, pulling him closer to his chest, his armpits musk somewhat noticeable now, as well his feet. It made Corey weak. Jason knew this, his musk was like a spider web and Corey was his fly. “Dude…ya know you’re my best friend right! Even though you’re gay n all that shit like…you know you’re like a brother to me right? Well, Bro, Its just well…a dude like needs his space you know? And I think its time this apartment like…opens up”

"What do you mean? I don't understand…Open up? I know the place is small but we all have enough space I thought" Now Corey's tone was beginning to sound a bit worried, "You want me to move out? Bro, what the hell?"

Jason, amused at the situation, give a deep chuckle a bit before sighing. “Yep…you sound just like Chris. Ya see he said the exact same thing. Dude got all like…pushy when I told him I wanted him to leave. You know how he is, always with a foot up his ass” He said as he began laughing at his own joke, wiggling his toes in his sock as he did so. “…..but the dude came around…I just had to relocate him, now he's gonna stay in my room! Just tucked in my sock drawer is all” Jason continued, as a shit eating grin spread across his bearded lips.

Corey shuffled away quickly, a concerned and confused look on his face "Wait what? relocate? sock? what are you talking about man?" He stared at his roommates smile and then looked to his feet, with only one wearing that fresh sock, and started to slowly inch away more.

"If this is some fucked up joke, I really don't get it man…"

As Jason saw Corey back away, he let give out a low exasperated sigh. “Why cant you guys have just said yes and just moved out” He say before snapping his fingers. Corey's body suddenly feeling strange as he quickly became very very light. “Jeez…it could have been so much easier, still , at least I don't have to worry about finding a matching sock for Chris now" his voice slightly perking up.

Corey suddenly felt lighter then air, that and a sense of dread "Jason, man, please, I don't understand….what's…happen…" Corey's mouth felt dry, and soft... before it felt like it was being stitched shut, albeit painlessly, Jason made sure of that. Corey started to shrink and in a poof, where he once was, a white, clean sock appeared before falling to the dirty floor.

“Oh be quiet man, I know you're gonna like it” Jason say with a chuckle before reaching over to the sock, picking it up and inspecting it. “Damn…just like Chris, nice and soft” He say with a grin, Corey's body now just a sock in Jason's hand. A sadistic chuckle came from Jason when he flipped his new sock and saw "Corey, Jason's Property, Size 15. Machine Wash Only" embroidered within the fabric. It made his cock bulge and tent in his shorts.

“Man…it really sucks how much of a clean freak you guys both are. You were such nice bros too” I say with a stern face before a grin spreads around his beard “...which makes this even more fuckin hot” before he pulled the new sock over his large foot, his warm smelly feet completely filling Corey up.

“You know…you should be happy dude!” Jason said as he flexed his big, meaty, toes inside the soft, warm sock “You and Chris can finally be my bros for life! Or well…socks for life” he say with a deep hearty chuckle before letting out a satisfied sigh “plus…I know you’ve been obsessed with me since Jr High…now you’ve got a reason to be with the big man for life”

Jason ended up keeping his roommates as his new socks. The two boys absorbed every drop of sweat and musk that came off those two big bad boys. Jason always thought it was insane how clean his roommates were were as people, but after a few days of partying, Jason sat down on his bedroom floor, and flexed both of his favourite socks, noticing how much darker and filthy the socks had became. “Fuck..my sweat really did fuck you guys up huh?” He said, knowing the socks minds were just soggied up, sweat filled, musk reeking, cotton mush at this point, completely corrupted and in love with his mighty feet.

Jason found it so fucking hot, how much of an effect he had on the two, that he began rubbing his meat, leaking precum into his shorts “god…you two are the bestest friends a bro like me could ever have…" Jason took off his shorts, exposing his excited cock, and lay on his bed. He peeled Corey off his foot, and slid him onto the eagerly waiting cockmeat. "lets see how absorbent you are tonight Corey…got a fat load waiting” He starting to rub the browned sock against his shaft as he peeled off Chris from his other foot and starting to sniff him. The socks shuddered, as Jason got ready to truly break in his sock boys.

The Corey sock was rubbed against the massive cock by Jason's sweaty hand, getting cock grime adhered to it's browned fabric, until its owner let out a primal growl, and shot a fat load right into the sock. Jason caught his breath as he watched his sock dampen and darken on his throbbing cock. Jason rubbed the sock across his cock to catch any loose cum, and left Corey on his softening cock, putting Chris back on his sweaty, unwashed foot. He pulled the cover over his body, yawning before falling asleep. Corey and Chris left in darkness under the bedsheet. Corey forced to absorb his masters cooling cum, and Chris being rubbed against Jason's other foot...

images sources are dallasfeet (i think, cant find the image source but that's what i think that watermark says) or otherwise unknown.

[omies-odd-writing-spot]

Doom Prompt 23: Cookies!

A Prompt from my Doom Discord. Based on the Garnets Story, slayer is such a brat, and ass, even to those he loves but not bad to them if that makes sense?

.

23: “Lily is teaching Loral how to make [her] chocolate chip cookies, but John and Heather keep trying to eat the batter”

“Don't you dare!” Lily grabbed one of the baking cups and chucked it at the massive form starting to lean over the bowls set up on the tall counters. The little green cup did nothing but splat a bit of flower on John's shoulder as he caught the cup after it bounced off him.

Looking up, John was highly amused about the defensiveness over what was being made. Lily was glaring at him and had one of the mixing spoons ready to sacrifice if needed to throw at him as well. “Hmm?”

“You don't have an innocent face, big guy,” Lily pointed to his right hand, “And I see that frozen swordfish steak you're chewing on. Don't you dare cross contaminate the batter!”

The not quite man looked down at the frozen piece of meat he had gotten out of the bin in the walk-in freezer that was marked for him. John looked back at Lily, tilting his head and debating on still doing something. Only for the shorter Loral to come up behind the Demigod and with the confidence of an older grandmother and former matriarch of her family. As well as who had learn she can safely get away with things. Loral reached up behind John as she walked by to smack him with the handle of her spatula.

The bigger Demigod grunted, even though it did not hurt he still reached up to rub his neck and turned with a hurt look. Only to scramble away as the spatula was held up again, the older woman shamelessly chased John away from their work area.

“Shoo! No cookies for you if you contaminate everything with raw meat!” Grandma Loral demanded, shaking the spatula like it was the only thing that could defend their cooking project. There were a lot more people on the Doom Fortress itself, and the fortress city was hidden in the broken moon now. 

Frozen? John signed, showing the chunk of fish meat, safely standing behind a corner and looking over. He was chased off, so now John was interested in what they were doing. The Slayer did not seem to take offense, if anything just let the smaller, weaker human ‘bully’ him around the kitchen. It was a lot more life he could see in Loral and Lily then before, and he liked seeing it.

“It's doesn't matter,” the woman crossed her arms, staring up at the taller man as a mixer was turned on behind her. “It's still cross contaminating. If that ice gets in the batter? Taste is ruined. No cookies for anyone.”

John pouted, hunching his shoulders and took a bite out of the frozen steak. Chewing through it as he leaned on the safe counter, watching as Loral walked back to pick up the bowl she set down with the eggs. Chicken eggs, that's what they were called. When Lily looked back, John tried to make a low sound at her. 

He wanted to see what they were doing!

“No.” Lily said firmly, pointing at the Demigod with the mixing spoon. “Finish your snack and wash your hands before you can see.”

John snorted, but stayed in place for a bit, not hurrying with his current favorite snack. It was cold, crunchy and was just a tasty protein! He shifted, got eyed by Grandma Loral and hesitated. It did not matter he was well over 2000 years older than her, she was grandma and John did not seem to mind letting some humans bully him. So when the Demigod did move, he gave the work area a wide berth of space.

At least until he found a new spot on the other side of the big island counter from the two humans. Head tilting back and forth as he eyed all the ingredients, trying to guess what would come out of it.

John recognized the chocolate chips now! There was also an orange-tan bowl that smelled different, and another of white chips? Chocolate chips came in different colors? 

…did they taste the same?

John tilted his head, finishing the fish steak at last and looked around. He stepped away to find a sink to wash his hands as he had been taught to do when around food. The Demigod rumbled in a pleased way out of sight as he found something. When he returned, John had not a something in his grip, but a someone. Heather was settled in his arms and getting nuzzled. The little girl was more than happy to get attention from her new guardian. Grasping the loose shirt John had on, Heather tried to humm back and mimic what she was feeling. 

Heather liked being held by John the most, some of the protective… Sentinels had good hugs too! Grandpa Valen had really good hugs, just not the same as getting a cuddle and hug from John. Her guardian was warm and just felt the safest. Heather looked up and put her hand on John’s cheek, getting his attention back on her, and then a cheek pressed against her head. 

The girl turned to see what was going on. Tilting her head before looking up at her guardian, signing a question. What are they baking?

John carefully set Heather down so she was sitting on the edge of the counter in front of him. Slowly starting to use the human sign, having only just learned it not long ago. Cookie.

Heather gasped at that, turning around and saw Grandma Loral eyeing them. Cookie?

You wait. The older woman signed back as she shook her head. They need to cook first.

Heather pouted, looking up at John. The big man was blinking slowly, thoughtfully before rumbling as he leaned forward. Arms around Heather he snorted against her shoulder and grinned at the little squeal of laughter that resulted. Seemingly distracting the girl from the cookies. 

John did not have to stare at the other side of the counter as he leaned forward to track Lily and Loral’s movements. He reached forward in a moment of distraction, grabbing some of the chocolate chips and shared them with the giggling Heather. The girl was trying to hide her delight so much that Grandma Loral looked over to see her shoving something in her mouth. John doing much the same where he was hunched over.

Far too experienced as a parent, and grandparent, Loral sighed, “Goodness. Watch out Lily, we have some cookie thieves.”

“What?” Lily turned from focusing on fishing that one little egg shell fragment out of the bowl. Blinked and then stood up, “Oy! No stealing ingredients!”

John blinked and tilted his head around Heather, still hunched over the girl to let her finish eating her share of the loot with some cover. “Hmm?”

“Go to the stores to get some,” Lily tossed an egg shell at the demigod. Who reflexively caught it, blinked slowly staring at the shell. Before he looked back, John then ate the shell, looking surprised at the crunchy.

“Oh my gods,” Lily sighed as she turned away to get the little fragment. There was a small sound and a giggle, Lily spun around, and saw John mid-motion of taking the whole bowl of butterscotch chips. “Hey!”

The Demigod grabbed Heather and the bowl, trying to get away, only moving slow enough to not disturbed the little girl was his downfall. As Loral took aim and chucked a heavier ‘glass’ measuring cup. Her aim was true and the old pyrix thing clunked against John’s head, then shoulder, hit a counter on the way down and bounced off the floor. Twice. All the while not breaking

That was actually impressive!

John stared down, after making sure that Heather on his right arm was safe, then grunted in surprise as Lily popped up in front of him. The bigger not quiet man held tighter to the bowl, but his adoptive daughter was a half step ahead and just scooped most of the chips from his new bowl, all into another bowl that she had. Then Lily ran away, John trying to step after, only to get a good smack from  behind.

The Great Slayer King, the only predator of hell, the Beast… he whined at the second smack from a spatula.

“You fiend!” Grandma Loral yelled. “Food thief!”

“Aarh?” John tried to say something, shifting to hide Heather as she was laughing. He flashed a grin but tried to get away with what few little bits of chips left in his bowl.

“Don’t you sass me! Heather! Smack him!” Loral said and signed.

Not sure what was going on, but delighted at the idea of adding to the fun chaos. Heather bapped at John’s neck and shoulder, not hard, but it had him giving a mock bite back with a low fake growling sound. It took a good ten, maybe fifteen minutes before the two calmed down to nibble on the few butterscotch chips left in the bowl. John sat up to look around a corner, debating on if there was anything to steal. 

Eyeing the closer bowl, he rolled onto hands and knees, then rocked up, trying to be stealthy for once and creep closer. It did not help that there was a giggling girl following, but he could work with that. Trying to circle the two cooking and looking for something to steal. His second attempt resulted with John couched behind a counter with a big bowl of… butter? Whipped butter? It tasted good, okay, but was not that sweet.

How did this turn into cookies?

“...JOHN!” Lily yelled, noticing the lack of giggling and now a missing bowl. 

The Demigod grabbed Heather, and the bowl just because, and fed into the dinning room. Grinning the whole time, debating if he can hold the butter hostage for something sweet for him- and Heather!

[geddy-leesbian]

start of my FE Serrennedy AU :3

Goddess, he was so stupid. What was he thinking, chasing a bandit down through a hole in a wall and then down a mysterious tunnel all by himself?

In his defense, what he did had made sense in the moment. If he'd stopped to call for the knights, the bandit would have slipped away. And it was just one thief! Leon would have easily struck him down in a one-on-one. No, the problem was that as soon as the tunnel opened up into a large open cavern, there was a demonic beast. Leon was not ready for that. Why would he have been? He's right under the church! Surely there should be some kind of magical protection keeping these nightmarish monsters away from the monastery. 

Or not. Definitely not, because he definitely did get his ass handed to him by a gigantic worm. He did put up a pretty valiant fight, giving the creature at least one gash in exchange for each bruise and bite wound it dealt to him. It didn't even kill him, it just left of its own accord after one well-timed thrash of its tail left Leon lying on his back with the wind knocked out of him. It could have been one hell of a story– the underdog Leon fighting a demonic beast all by himself and escaping with his life! And it would have been, if he wasn't down in some fucking cavern where no one would ever look for him. 

But he is. And a bite wound is bleeding heavily. He feels dizzy when he tries to get up. He'd survive this if he was anywhere else, with a light magic user able to heal him, or even just someone more run of the mill with a cloth to slow the bleeding and keep him stable until an actual doctor could get to him. 

All alone, goddess knows where, he just lies there and tries not to think about how much everything hurts and how cold he is until he finally slips out of consciousness. 

-

Somehow he wakes up. He's alive? There's still some pain, but he feels it fading, the hurt being replaced by the pleasant warmth of healing white magic. Someone else must have seen him enter the tunnel and got help before it was too late.

“Thanks…” Leon manages to open his eyes, and is shocked to see a tan stranger kneeling above him, mending his wounds with white magic. A stranger. Not a knight, not one of his magically gifted classmates. He panics and his right hand gropes at the… ground? Floor? trying to find his sword. “Who the hell are you?”

“I could say the same to you. Barging into someone else's home, swinging your sword around like you own the place… Bit rude, no? Tell me your name first, intruder, then maybe I'll tell you mine,” The stranger's face twists into a mischievous smile. “One of mine, at least.”

“If I'm a rude intruder, why are you healing me?” Leon gives up on trying to get his sword, it's not like this is a fight he could ever win. He doesn't even know where he is. Just that he's underground and can hear running water. “Could've left me to rot or finished the job yourself if you were impatient.”

“Because you don't seem like an intruder who came here with the intention of causing trouble for the inhabitants of Abyss. You seem like a garden variety idiot, not the type I kill if I can help it. And! Your uniform, you're a student at the Officers Academy. I might get myself a pretty penny for bringing back one of their precious students in one piece.”

“Fine. I'm Leon. Who are you and where am I?”

“Oh. Oh! I know you! Of you, at least. I'm Luis. You're Lord Marvin's adopted kid, right?”

“Yeah,” Leon stares at Luis's handsome face for a minute, until something clicks into place. “I think I saw you once. You're Spencer's adopted son, right? What are you doing down some horrible hole, Spencer must be worried sick about you! We should go back to the surface and get you home, with two of us we'll be fine even if we run into monsters.”

“Home? Spencer? I'd rather die than go back to him. This is my home. It's not a hole, and it's not horrible. This is Abyss. A hidden little city beneath the monastery, a refuge for those who can't live on the surface. Surely you've heard rumors? Maybe heard about the savage mockingbird, the handsome leader and protector of Abyss?”

“Uh, that does ring a bell. Isn't he like, a hardened criminal? Gang leader that's murdered a whole lot of people?”

“I suppose that isn't incorrect, I have done that.”

“You?! How did you go from a noble house, a student at the academy with a great future, to this?” Leon looks at Luis, completely appalled. “A criminal hanging out in a den of other criminals, even leading them.”

“It's a long story. Maybe I'll tell you someday. But for now, you feel like you can walk?” Despite Luis being prolific enough as a cruel murderer to have earned a reputation and a nickname, he helps Leon to his feet with all the gentleness and care of the monastery's kindest priests. When he looks down at himself, he sees the lighter wounds that weren't worth healing magically were still expertly bandaged. “We should get you back up to the surface before anyone notices you've been gone, I'm sure you'd be in a lot of trouble for sneaking off to explore–”

“I wasn't exploring!” Leon interjects. “I was chasing a thief. He got away when the monster attacked.”

“Ah, one of my lackeys. Still, even with your noble intentions I get the feeling your activities would earn you one hell of a lecture for doing something so reckless. I suggest you sneak back into your bed, hide your injuries, in the morning say you're tired because you didn't sleep well, so no one has to know what you were up to.”

“Doesn't that defeat the purpose of you saving me? If you want your reward, you'll have to tell someone about it.”

“Forget the reward. This is just… Some charity work.”

[in-your-skele]

Rex Sloane x Self Drabble

I rolled my eyes as I once again listened to rex drone on and on about how Katie had been bullying him again. I never knew why he ever came crying to me about it like I could do something. Katie just didn't like him, it was quite plain and simple. Everyone on the team knew how much she truly despised him. In the way her dark eyes would narrow just slightly when he would enter a room, how her full lips would part in a silent sigh when he would ask an obvious question, how the brown skin, just a few shades lighter than my own, between her brows would crease anytime she would hear him utter something truly idiotic. Even I found myself at times doing things similar to her whenever my patience was low that day.

Thankfully for Rex, today I was in a better mood, bored, but still in a decent enough mood to listen to his insistent babbling. We were currently in the lounge area of the guardians HQ, no one else was around so we had the entire lunge to ourselves.

What a win

"Gaaaabee! You're not listening again." Rex whined as he leaned across the off white table between us, his long lings easily reaching out to let his fingers tangle along with mine. His cloused finger pads rubbed lightly against my softer and smooth ones. He looked up from our interlocked fingers to meet my dark eyes hidden behind the clear lenses of my glasses. He had that usual pout on his face whenever I would ignore him, sometimes it made me regret being so willing to allow him to touch me.

I huffed rolling my eyes, but I made not action to move my hand away from his in the slightest. My hand shifted closer to his so he wouldn't be leaning across the table like he was reaching for a treat. I DIDINT fail to notice a small smile grace his pretty full lips when I leaned over to allow him to hold out hands in the center of the table between us, allowing him to mess with my fingers and hands like I would him.

"sorry dude, just been in my head a lot recently with all this stuff goin on. Ya know?" I asked, staring at him as if awaiting an answer to the greatest question in the world. Which, with the current stress it was feeling like it.

Rex paused his hands for a moment which had let go of one of my hands to allow me to rest my cheek on. Both of his larger hands closed around my one smaller like he was trying to heat it up in the middle of a cold night. His brows furrowed as if he was searching his often empty mind for the best combination of words in the right order to offer me some form of comfort. He had comforted people before, knowing how to read them and gauge the best way to give them solace.

But that was the issue with me, he could never truly read me. Even despite our turmoil together, our strength together, and our bond as both heroes and friends together, I had never really shown my true self to him. Always keeping up a shield around everyone, only letting them see just a peek into my true self before I would shut the door back.

Sighing he kept his eyes on his hands, noting the light scaring on the warm tan skin of his that encapsulated my own deep caramel brown skin of my own hands. Biting the inside of his cheek his lips finally parted as he spoke.

"yeah, I get it. Cecil hasnt been too hard on ya has he? I know ya told me his training was becoming a pain in the ass to keep up with." He peeked up, a few strands of ginger hair falling from his messy bun. His eyes scanned me over, training on my eyes that stayed hidden behind my glasses, the clear lenses and frames offering a barrier between my soul and those trying to peer inside.

"uh, well, I've gotten stronger, but the training is... Intense to say the least. Cecil wants me to be as close to Mark in power as possible-" I spoke, a tired expression on my face as I turned to look away, resisting the urge to click my tongue and suck my teeth at the distasteful thought of having to train so much to be on par with an alien. However my thoughts were cut short by a click of a tongue.

I glanced at rex and his irritated expression and I couldn't help but chuckle. I used my extra hands and playfully reached over the table to push at his face. He grumbled again before starting to play with my hand again.

"he wants you to be on the same level as mark? The guy who is currently the strongest being on earth, the one with super strength, durability, fli-" he started to use one hand to start to list off the abilities mark has making me roll my eyes before interrupting him with a wave of my hand.

"yeah yeah we all know how great Mark is. But, in Cecil's words, 'he is a double edged sword so he needs a damned good shield to keep him Sharp' or something along those lines. I dunno."

I waved my hand dismissively to him. He stared at me with a dead panned expression to his face.

"look, I have light durability as well! My bubbles and healing aren't my only ability. I have always had more, like I also have flight, but I've never fully used it with my boots so I didn't need to." I shrug like what I was spouting was common knowledge. Everyone assumed I could float and just use my boots to move me wherever I needed but they just give me a boost for my slow flight speed.

"besides T-Rex, on the upside I get to hang out with mark. Ah and get to see him all sweaty and worked up during our training together." I know rex probably thought he saw hearts swirling around my head like a cartoon or something with the way I was talking about mark. It wasn't a secret to the man in front of me or my closest friend Katie with how... Down bad I was for Mark grayson.

Despite our rocky beginning and my sour attitude towards him for making me have to do more work I did warm up to him after he saved me a few times and I took him out for food as a thanks. Ever since I met him I've called him cute but as we got to know one another more the word cute around others has to to hot or sexy even at times when I'm bold around rex and Katie. Katie encourages my down bad tendencies and hell even rex does as well but I assume by the shake of his head he wasn't in the mood to encourage my tom foolery.

"leave it to the great gabe to find the bright side in brutal training is looking at a guy's ass." He rolled his eyes before peeking and smirking at my blushing face. He dramatically sighs before he once again leans all over the table between us, acting like a spoiled dog when the owner gives more attention to another pet.

"but I understand, me and Katie are just some side hoes now huh? All those talks about how you'd do tricks on my shit was it all a lie!" He dramatically pretends to cry over the table like I had just stepped on his toe or something in my boots. Which did happen one time and he swears it still hurts to this day. (Its obviously a lie but he just likes to mess with me.) I sigh as I shake my head before running my fingers through his silky ginger hair.

"yep, I lied. I totally wouldn't do tricks on it, wouldn't bend over and let you even stare at my amazingly voluptuous ass cheeks. You know what." I suddenly stood up, wiping a fake tear from my eye as I moved from behind the table to pretend to walk away.

"you're right we can't keep doing this when Mark is my main bitch. I can't even let you come and cuddle, let alone rest your head on my thighs so close to my sacred punany. Goodbye side hoe." Rex scrambled off the table chuckling for a brief second before fake crying as he quickly ran up behind me hugging me from behind.

"NOOOO! Leave him! Me and Katie are better for you! We can keep a secret, mark doesn't have to knoooww! Just don't leave me! Don't leave us!" He fell onto his knees on the ground behind me. And I tried my hardest to stay in character.

I turned around and stared down at him with a serious expression. "Sigh, you're right. I can't leave my two favorite side bitches. Okay, I won't leave you two for Mark, at least for now." Rex grinned before I chuckled braking character, I pushed his face back roughly making him nearly fall back before he caught himself with a hand planted on the ground. "And get your dog ass up, I only want you on your knees if we fuckin or fighting ya hear boy."

He chuckled before standing up and sitting his hands. He followed me back to the table, grabbing his phone. Just as he was about to sit back in his seat I instead patted the part of the booth beside me. He paused before grinning, pushing the table away just a bit so his head wouldn't be under the table before climbing onto the booth and laying down, his arms wrapping around my thick plush thighs and his head on my lap.

I chuckled as I watched him turn his phone on, checking the time before looking at me. I hummed before I pushed his phone up a bit and unlocked his phone (it was his birthday) before clicking on Instagram to look on reels. "Eh, I'll just have to run a few extra laps and do a few more reps for being late. But I don't mind. Now c'mon get to scrolling slave daddy is hungry for reels." Rex visibly cringed when I called myself daddy before he shook his head and clicked on the reels button.

As he scrolled through reels, giving me a look at his fyp, I pulled his hair tie loose letting his hair fall on my lap. I pulled the hair tie around my wrist before I started to run my hands through his hair, massaging his scalp. I felt him shift to be more comfortable on my lap and lean more into my touch which made me smile a bit. I leaned down and rubbed my nose to his forehead, something similar to how I would rub my cheek against katie's sometimes when I was extra affectionate. I smile a bit as my fangs expose before I whisper lowly.

"thanks for listening and trying to make me relax more. You're better than you hold yourself to Rex. Love ya bro." I felt him sigh before leaning his face to look at mine. Our noses brushed as he stared up at me with a stupid cocky grin he would have whenever I gave him praise for something.

"aw thanks shortcake, and hear I thought you just liked to be around me for my sexy body. Not that I could blame you of course." He winked making me chuckle and pushed his face away before I leaned away from his face.

"ah well that's part of it. I don't like to surround myself with ugly people." I stated confidently, to which rex snickered before looking back at his screen as I went back to massaging his scalp in a way that had him like putty in my lap.

I smiled down at the way the light from the phone seemed to make his best features pop. Not that I minded, nor he, we knew we both most definitely would fuck each other and even stated one day we would.

(pinky promised and everything)

I rolled my eyes at the thought before I looked down at his screen before uttering simple words that always shocked him.

"one day, I'm gonna peg you."

"wait what!?"

[theoceantot]

Chapter 5

(TW! Sanemi being mean, autistic breakdowns, use of r slur)

The day finally came when Y/n had to meet the other hashira and decide if she was a threat or not. Shinobu, Mitsuri, and Giyu knew she wouldn't harm anyone but it didn't stop them from worrying about your safety. You've been getting closer to Mitsuri and Giyu. She would often style your hair and give you yummy snacks and then Giyu would let you play with his hair and let your wear his harori. The biting didn't stop though.

At all

Everyone in the estate has been bit at least once. They didn't hurt the majority of the time but every once in awhile it would draw a bit of blood. Which would make you have a meltdown. Shinobu once lightly scolded you for biting her too hard and not understanding if she was really mad at you caused a crying fit for 20 minutes.

Mitsuri wanted you to look really cute in front of everyone so she picked your outfit and did your hair just like hers.

"Eeeeekkkkk! You're the cutest"

Y/n giggled and reached her arms out to be picked up. Mitsuri held you in the air and spun you around making you laugh loudly. Shinobu watches from the crack in the door smiling to herself. This is the first time she's ever seen you be this happy. Mitsuri carried you out of the room not noticing Shinobu becasue she's too focused on how cute you're being (And that you're trying to put your braids in your mouth)

By the time they got there all the pillars were there with the master. Giyu was getting yelled at by Obanai and Sanemi for 'not killing you when they had the chance'

He just kinda took it not wanting to fight with them and knowing that you weren't dangerous in the slightest. None of the hashira knew anything personal about you or what you looked like. They were expecting this savage demon with razor sharp teeth and claws that looked like they were bound to attack any minute. So imagine the suprise when they see you. 4'7 with an adorable dress on holding the cat plushie Mitsuri got for you closely to your chest.

"What in the fuck" Sanemi grumbled in disbelief.

Shinobu softly chuckled and tried bringing you closer to all of them for a proper introduction but you firmly stood your ground starting to direct eye contact to everywhere but what was in front of you.

Too many people

And they did NOT like you

Well, you weren't for sure about all of them but the white haired man and the guy with the snake looked at you with such hatred that it genuinely terrified you.

"N-no"

No? That was something you rarely ever said. You almost ALWAYS listened to your mama and her friends. And if you didn't it's because you couldn't fully grasp what she was telling you. Shinobu didn't get mad tho like you expected her too for not listening

"Shes not good with new people especially ones that look like they wanna hurt her" Shinobu softly glared at Obanai and Sanemi.

Mitsuri looked at Obanai with disappointment which caused him to look away. Sanemi was a different story though.

"You really expect me to be all goody goody with a demon?! After all they've done to us why would you willingly take one in knowing that it's gonna end up killing you and others in your estate! Shes just trying to manipulate you with this innocent act so she can try to take us out! Let me kill that freak and save us all time!"

Freak?

That was something whe heard all too much of growing up. Going to school nobody including her parents understood why she never made eye contact, didn't like most the food, or threw tantrums when the routine was changed. They called her a "weirdo" "r*tard" 𝐅𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤.

That word hurt the most out of any insult or punch she'd get. All you did was stare at the ground with wide eyes trying not to cry. All the memories started flooding back in her mind. It took everything in Giyu not to kick his ass right there. Shinobu was shaking in anger hardly able to form a smile and Mitsuri quickly ran to you trying to embrace you but you screamed and pushed her away with force. Enough to where she almost fell.

No touching. Not now.

Everything was too much.

Your eyes turned purple a terrified look in your eyes as you ran towards the forest behind everyone. It was dawn and close to being dark. There's no way you can fight off demons on your own.

"Y/N WAIT! PLEASE COME BACK!" Mitsuri yelled after you.

Giyu wasted no time after running after you. Mitsuri dragged Obanai along, and Shinobu kicked Sanemi in the shin making him fall in pain.

"You know it's not a good idea to piss off the woman who takes care of all your injuries. Maybe one day I'll slip up and make a big mistake" Shinobu threatened and cut him lightly on his back.

He hated to admit it but she did have a point.

If he was gonna stay on good terms with Shinobu then he would at least TRY to get along with you. Sanemi let out a "tsk" and followed Shinobu to look with you along with Tengen and Rengoku. Muichiro already forgot what was happening.

Now back to you in the woods. Due to the flashbacks and trauma that was shed to light again you regressed very young where you can't talk or even walk. You've never been regressed this young before and it frightened you a lot. The world felt so big and it seemed like everything and everyone was out to get you. Huddling against a tree and flapping your hands aggressively you crying louder.

This wasn't good as it was not night time and demons were out hunting. Thankfully some of the Hashira with good hearing (aka Tengen) was able to hear and easily locate you. When he got there he didn't know what to do in the situation. You were hitting your head against a tree drawing some blood and crying to the point you were choking.

Obviously you didn't wanna be touched so that was out. What about singing or humming a melody? He's heard some autistic people comfort themselves with music. Worth a try. Tengen started humming a simple tune. Not too loud but loud enough for you to be able to hear it slowly taking your attention away from hurting your head that was still bleeding.

After a few minutes your cries turned into sniffles as you looked up at Tengen with such fascination. Slowly your eyes started to close just wanting to sleep and replenish your energy. Tengen asked if he could pick you up and you just quietly babbled back letting him carry you in his strong arms.

Before you fell asleep he gasped in suprise almost dropping you. Out of love you bit him. Tengen didn't know if he had to be ready to attack becasue well you're a demon but you fell asleep slowly after that.

He sent his crow out to tell everyone she was found and safe with some minor injuries. Tengen waited at the butterfly estate with you being cradled in his arms. Every now and then you'd start whining and moving around but all he had to do was start humming again and you'd calm down.

Mitsuri, Obanai, Shinobu, and Giyu got back in the estate shortly after and ran around looking for Tengen until they found him sitting in your rocking chair. The girls had to hold back laughs as you started biting his arm as you slept.

Shinobu grabbed a purple paci from a draw and put it in your mouth. Much to Tengens relief. He put you in your crib and carefully tucked you under the covers.

They all exited the room and sighed in relief just relieved you were safe.

"I don't know how to thank you Tengen" Shinobu thanked

"I'll definitely think of something" He said and looked to the side like there was more on his mind.

"What is it?" Obanai questioned.

"Its just that she shouldn't have been able to walk out at dawn without getting at least a bit burnt. And the way I found her. She was banging her head against a tree and sobbing like she was dying. I know she's a demon but I can't help feeling a bit of remorse for her"

"I included her being to walk in the sun in the letter. So how did you not know?" Shinobu questioned

"The master said the letter was you saying that you had a demon in your care and the rest was colored over with purple crayon so we didn't know what it said" Obanai explained.

Now she remembered

She left the letter on her desk when you were coloring in her office.

What a little trouble maker

[sinsiriuslyemo]

Title: I Know I'm Pretty

Pairing: Drexyl Spivey/Reader

Rating: NC17 (smut, language, marijuana use)

Summary: You and your roommate get a new weed dealer. As it turns out, he's hot.

Notes: This idea was super random and just sort of sprung up on me. I obviously don't condone anything that Drexyl Spivey stands for if he were a real person.

Warning: marijuana use, dirty talk, explicit sexual content, spanking

Your first impression of Drexyl Spivey came secondhand, when your roommate told you about this new pot dealer in town — some white guy with locs and gold teeth. The image that the short description conjured in your mind was more cartoonish than man, so when she asked if you would accompany her to get some pot from him, you agreed. Your regular dealer had just moved to Colorado, and you figured, best case scenario you would have found a new dealer with quality pot. Worst case scenario, you would at least get some amusement from the cartoonish weed guy.

The last thing you expected when you walked into his decent sized house on Woodward was to be attracted to him.

‘Attracted to him’ seemed way too light, actually.

The man was hot. Lean, with long dark locs that reached past his shoulders, a goatee, a blue right eye, one cloudy left one and a deep scar that circled the cloudy eye. He wore a leopard print silk robe that was left carelessly open to expose his bare chest, loose flannel pants and comfy-looking house slippers.

“Well, well, well…” His gravelly voice crackled on your skin while he slowly looked you over, undressing you with his one good eye as he sucked his front teeth. “What we got here, Marty?”

“These two lookin’ for some Mary Jane,” said the man who had let you both in, standing behind you and your roommate.

Normally you would’ve kept one eye on the doorman, but your attention was completely fixed on Drexyl, who was sitting on the couch, his knees spread comfortably with one side of his lips curled up.

“I’m Alex,” your roommate blurted out, waving awkwardly.

“Well, come on over here then, Alex.” He said her name playfully, his eyes only glancing at her for a moment before they were back on you. “What about you, Sugar? What’s your name?”

You couldn’t help the way you smirked right back at him. “Not Sugar.”

His smile slowly widened, a chuckle trickling up from his chest as he tilted his head to one side as if trying to check out your ass. While your roommate happily took up space on the far side of the couch, you purposely sat in the armchair that was next to it, which he clearly wasn’t thrilled about.

“So what can Drexyl do for you ladies?”

“We were hoping to get a quarter,” you said.

“How do I know you ain’t cops?”

“Oh, we’re not,” Alex said with a smile, holding up two fingers. “Scout’s honor.”

His grin resembled that of a wolf, eyes still planted on you as his tongue grazed over his front teeth. It made a shiver pull from between your thighs, and you pressed your knees together in an effort to calm yourself.

“Prove it,” he said, crooking his finger and beckoning you to him.

You barely managed to keep from rolling your eyes as you stood and stepped toward him, frowning when he patted one of his thighs.

“You think I’m gonna fuck you for some pot?” You arched a brow at him. “I’m not.”

“Girl, relax, I’m not asking you to,” he answered, shifting to the edge of the couch to lift the lid off a box on the coffee table and pull out a joint. “I just wanna see how good you can take a shotgun.” He winked so quickly that you almost wondered if you’d imagined it. “Come here, Not Sugar, I won’t bite. Unless you like that.”

He didn’t light the joint until you started to move again, reclining back against the couch as you sat on his lap, facing Alex, your feet settling between his. He had more, smaller scars on the same side of his face and you fought the urge to trace them with your finger. The hand behind you landed on the small of your back while the other held the joint after he’d taken two healthy drags and beckoned you toward him.

Biting down on your bottom lip, you bent down and pressed your lips against his, opening your mouth to suck as much of the smoke out of his as you could. All the while you ignored the tingle between your thighs and how the seat of her panties grew wet. You gasped when his tongue swept against yours and groaned at the taste of tobacco, sugar and what tasted like pork fried rice. You moved your own to return the favor, licking along two of his gold teeth before retreating back into your mouth. When you couldn’t inhale anymore, you pulled away, holding back a cough before blowing the smoke out steadily, and coughing one more time.

Apparently, he was satisfied with your performance, smiling up at you as he said, “You said a quarter?”

That was three weeks ago, and ever since you hadn’t been able to get the taste of tobacco, sugar and pork fried rice out of your mouth. What was worse was that his weed was the best you'd ever had — smooth, slightly sweet and earthy, much like him, and with an even keeled, full body high.

“He was totally into you,” Alex said, taking a drag from the joint she’d just rolled. “It was crazy, even that Marty guy was like —” She widened her eyes and shifted them from side to side.

“Whatever, he was okay,” you replied in a chuckle.

“Yeah, right, I was surprised when you said you weren’t gonna fuck him. Like, did you suddenly get over your thing with scars?”

You blinked. “What thing with scars?”

“You know, how you’re totally into guys who have scars? Like, remember when we watched Scarface and you were, like, obsessed with Tony Montana for months? Drexyl could be like your Scarface.”

Your mouth opened and closed in guppy-like motions as you tried to think of something to say. But nothing came. And if you were being completely honest with yourself, Drexyl was hot. But he was also cocky, which made you want to fight the fact that you absolutely would’ve let him fuck you, and you didn’t even need anything in return.

“Whatever,” you muttered, shaking your head.

“We’re almost out,” she said with a smirk. “You should totally call him and be like, ‘Oh hey, Drexyl, can we get some more weed?’ And I bet he’d be all, ‘Yeah, Baby, why don’t you bring your fine ass over here and get it?’ And you’d be all…” She giggled theatrically.

“You’re such an asshole,” you muttered, trying to hold back a smile. “He’s exactly the type of guy I should be staying away from. He’s probably dangerous.”

“Yeah, but I bet he’s a great lay,” Alex mumbled, taking an inhale from the joint, holding in the smoke as she added, “Seriously, we should call him and see if we can come get more. I wanna bake cookies.”

“You’re supposed to use skunk for baking,” you reminded her.

“I don't care, I’m doing that gourmet shit. Let’s go, call him.”

“Why do I have to call him?!”

“You’re so annoying, I’ll call him. Jesus,” Alex groaned, picking up her phone from the coffee table. “You wouldn’t even tell him your name, so rude,” she mumbled, hitting a few buttons before she brought the phone up to her ear.

You took the joint from her and took a drag, biting down on your bottom lip as you tried to listen for his voice.

“Hey Drexyl, it’s Alex — Awesome, we were hoping we could stop by again today.” She held her free hand in front of her, inspecting her nails absently. “Oh okay — yeah, that’s fine. I’ll page you. — okay, cool. Bye.” Hanging up, she reached over and plucked the joint from between your fingers.

“So what time are we heading over?”

“Oh he’s running errands so he’s gonna come here,” she replied.

“What?! You invited a drug dealer to our apartment?!”

“Oh my God, relax, it’s not like he’s selling us heroin. Besides, now you can just take him to your room for a quick fuck instead of hoping he’ll invite you into his!” she replied with a happy grin.

“I hate you,” you said half-heartedly, standing up to go change into something cute.

“Put on shorts, bitch! Show off your legs, they’re amazing,” Alex called after you, taking the last few tokes from the joint before putting it out in the ashtray on the coffee table.

It was four hours later that there was a knock on your door, and your stomach did a somersault as you went to it and looked through the peephole.

Drexyl stood in a button down shirt that had most of the buttons undone, with only two fastened in the middle. The top of the shirt was spread, showing off his chest and his black pants slung low on his hips. Behind him was Marty, the stout bodyguard you had met the first time you went to see Drexyl, holding a duffle bag. Running a hand over your hair, you pulled the door open.

“Oh hey,” you said, trying to sound aloof, but Drexyl just smirked.

“Oh. Hey,” he replied, imitating you playfully as he leaned against the doorframe. “You gonna let me in or what, Not Sugar?”

The corner of your mouth began to curl, but you pursed your lips to stop it, stepping aside and letting both of them in. Closing the door, you followed them down the narrow entryway and into the living room, where Alex was flipping through channels.

“Hi Drexyl,” Alex said, sitting up on the couch and grinning up at Marty. “Hey Marty. Come sit!”

Marty looked at Drexyl, who nodded before he looked over his shoulder at you.

“Y/N.”

“What’s that?”

“My name,” you said, walking past him and sitting on the arm of the couch. “Y/N”

“Y/N,” he repeated, as if testing the syllables on his tongue. The growl in his voice sent a shiver over your body, your nipples tightening beneath the sleeveless cotton shirt you were wearing. Brushing past you, he sat on the couch as well, so close that you may as well have been sitting on his lap again. He glanced down at your bare legs, licking his lips before turning to Alex. “So you want the same as last time?”

“I wanna make cookies, so can we maybe do a half?” Alex asked.

“Cookies?” Drexyl replied. “You know you’re supposed to use skunk for that, don’t you?”

“Told you,” you said, earning Drexyl’s attention again.

“Listen to your homegirl,” he said, gesturing to you with his head.

“Oh my God, I literally don’t care, I wanna bake gourmet cookies, damn it. Marty, tell them they’re being super annoying,” Alex groaned, bringing her legs up to tuck under her as she returned her attention to the TV.

Marty, however, just looked at her as though she had spoken in a different language.

“Don’t mind her, she smoked the last spliff before you guys got here,” you said.

Drexyl looked up at you again. “What about you, Y/N? You smoke the spliff too?”

“No,” you answered, this time not caring to keep the smile from forming on your lips. “I know how to control myself.”

“Stop being judgy, Y/N, I’m on vacation,” Alex muttered, reaching for the bowl of pretzels on the coffee table and eating one before she offered some to Marty. “Pretzel?”

“Thanks,” Marty said, speaking for the first time as he reached into the bowl.

“So a half then?” Drexyl asked, his eyes still on you.

You nodded, but Alex was the one who answered. “Yeah, half. You want a pretzel?”

“Nah,” he purred, and his eyes still hadn’t left you. “You got anything sweeter?”

Your lips parted as you considered suggesting he come find something sweeter in the other room with you, when Alex beat you to it.

“Y/N is totally into scars, by the way.”

Your eyes widened as you looked up at her. “Alex, shut up! Jesus fucking Christ!”

Drexyl was chuckling in amusement. He reached into the bag that Marty had come in with and pulled out a freezer bag filled with weed. “Marty, weigh out a half for them.” He looked up at you and pulled out a joint from his front shirt and held it up, gesturing to the hall with his head. “Let’s me and you enjoy this since she’s already smoked.”

You glanced apprehensively at Marty, only for Drexyl to command your attention again.

“Don’t worry, Baby, Marty will be a gentleman, won’t you Marty?” He looked in Marty’s direction.

“Yeah, man, I’ll be a gentleman.”

“Whatever, Marty, I see how it is,” Alex mumbled, belching loudly as she settled on a rerun of Ren and Stimpy. “You better like Ren and Stimpy or I’ll die.”

Drexyl was grinning, standing up and waiting for you to lead the way. You swallowed and stood, reaching to pinch the front of his shirt between two fingers and gently tug him along behind you. You pulled him into your bedroom, closing the door behind him just as he lit the spliff.

“I really am sorry about Alex, she gets kinda weird when she’s stoned,” you said, hoping that he was taking your roommates comments in stride.

“Yeah, I remember, she started singing the Spice Girls the last time,” he replied.

You put your hand over your face and laughed. “Fuck, that’s right, I forgot about that.” You went to the mattress on the floor in the corner of the room below the window, and sat down.

“So, you like my scars?” he purred, blowing out the smoke as he handed the joint to you and got to his knees on the edge of the mattress.

Your lips parted again as you took the joint between your fingers. “Maybe.” You took a drag.

“I got hit with a bottle,” he said, as though leaning into the idea that you were fascinated by it.

“Ouch,” you said under your breath, taking a drag. Your eyes ran over the large, C-shaped scar. “What about these little ones?” you asked, gently stroking the smaller scars between his brows and on the bridge of his nose. “Same incident?”

He nodded. “Mhm.”

Taking another drag, you shifted back and patted the mattress next to you, inviting him to sit as you handed the joint back.

“You got any more?” you couldn’t help but ask as he moved to sit with you.

He smirked and held the joint between his lips, unbuttoning the two buttons of his shirt before he pulled it open to reveal a circular scar on his ribs, just beneath his pec on the right side. Your fingers came to graze over it, a breath leaving you at the feel of the raised skin beneath the pads of your fingertips. He pulled the shirt off and gestured with one hand to his back while the other hand took the spliff out of his mouth.

Moving behind him, you looked over the vast array of scars on the expanse of his back, running your fingers over each of them. Some were straight lines, others more jagged, both deep and somewhat faded. He let you explore them for a moment before he put out the joint on the ashtray you kept by the mattress. You hardly noticed, still entranced by the scar just behind his shoulder when he turned to face you.

“We’ll finish that later,” he mumbled as one hand smoothed over your knee, his eyes taking you in. “God damn, girl, you are so fuckin’ fine.”

You gasped as he leaned forward on his hands and knees, closing the space between you to take your lips in a heated kiss. Groaning against your lips, his tongue flicked against them, demanding rather than requesting entrance. Another moan buzzed against your lips as you opened up for him, pulling him on top of you as you lay back on the mattress, You yanked the various throw pillows from beneath you and threw them out of the way, rocking your hips up against his as he grabbed your breast and pinched your nipple. Biting down on his bottom lip, you dug your nails into his back, holding him in place while your legs curled around him as well.

His lips lowered to leave wanton kisses on your neck, his facial hair lightly scratching against your skin, while one hand worked to unbutton your shorts. A tingle bloomed between your legs, muscles clenching and unclenching as he reached up to pull your shirt off, groaning at the sight of your bare breasts. He wasted no time in taking one nipple into his mouth with his fingers twisted and tweaked the other. You bucked up against him, shivering when you felt his hard cock pressed against the seat of your shorts.

“Fuck,” you whimpered.

“Oh yeah,” he replied, sliding one hand down the front of your shorts. “I’m gonna fuck this pussy so deep you’re gonna feel me for days.”

Your muscles clenched at his words as his fingers slipped through your folds, smearing your essence on your clit in quick, tight circles. Arching your back you cried out, rocking your hips in time with his movements, a light sheen of sweat forming on your neck. When he sucked your other nipple into his mouth and slid two fingers inside you, your eyes rolled to the back of your head, more juices wetting his digits as they curled toward your belly.

“Fuck! Drex!” you moaned, hips bucking wildly against him as one hand held tight to his locs.

“So wet for me,” he purred against your collar bone, thrusting his fingers harder in and out so that the sounds of them moving inside you grew louder. “Cum on my fingers, Baby Girl, come on.” He wiggled his digits against your G spot, earning an elated cry as your back arched again as he egged you on, “Such a good girl. That’s it, Baby, come for me.”

With a final arch of your back, your muscles gripped his fingers again and again, waves of pleasure shooting from the apex of your thighs. Your throat was raw as you screamed his name, begged for more, lifting your head to look at where his hand was shoved down the front of your unzipped and unbuttoned shorts. Your legs twitched, opening wider for him as he moved to sit back on his haunches, his fingers still buried deep inside you. Pulling his hand away, he smirked at your whimper at the loss of his digits and pulled your shorts and panties down and off.

“Fuck, you got a pretty pussy,” he purred, eyes locked on it as he unbuckled his belt.

You immediately sat up and helped, all but ripping his jeans open and shoving them down his hips. You licked your lips at the sight of his thick, long cock whipping from beneath his boxers, slapping his lower belly. Unable to help yourself, you reached for him and stroked his length a few times while he kicked off his jeans and boxers.

“Fuck me, Drex,” you moaned.

He groaned around a smirk and grabbed your hips, flipping you onto your hands and knees.

You yelped when his hand came down on your ass once. Twice. And a third time before he lined himself up with your entrance and pushed inside in one long stroke. His hands gripped your hips, holding you hard against him as he groaned in relief, letting you get used to his girth. After a moment, he slowly pulled out and snapped back in, beginning a steady tap of skin on skin. He filled you so well that your breath caught in your throat, and every time he buried himself to the hilt he was reaching a place inside you that not even your dildo had ever reached. Your legs trembled, the tickles in your pussy reaching a crescendo as he reached for a handful of your hair and carefully pulled your head up, using it as leverage.

“Fuck yourself back on my cock,” he growled, spanking you again with his free hand. “Like I know you wanted to the first day you met me.”

You almost want to give him a snarky response when he snapped his hips forward one, twice, three times as if to get your undivided attention. Then he stopped moving and let you take over, growling low in his chest as you rocked yourself hard back into him. Closing your eyes, you let yourself get lost in the feeling of him filling you over and over,

“Such a tight little pussy,” he whispered, the hand in your hair loosening as it and the other hand grab hold of your hips again, pulling you back against him. Moving with you, he spanked you again, snapping his hips forward until you were sure there would be bruises left behind.

He bent forward to bite the juncture where neck meets shoulder as one arm snaked around you to circle his fingers on your clit again. You whined as the pleasure and pain pushed you over the edge and your pussy hugged him again and again, your body trembling. His fingers didn’t let up, nor did his hips, stroking you through your own orgasm before he slammed into you one last time and you felt the heat of his release spurt deep inside you. He grunted next to your ear, keeping himself buried a moment longer while he reached for the abandoned joint before slowly pulling out and laying next to you.

“Grab that lighter out of my pocket?” he said, rearranging the pillows behind you.

It took you a moment to get your bearings enough to move. You fished the zippo out of his jeans and handed it to him as you laid down. Watching him light the joint, you bit down on your bottom lip as your eyes followed the scar around his eye again. You were still throbbing between your legs, your muscles spasming every few moments as though expecting to still find him inside you, and you realize after a moment that he wasn’t exaggerating when he said that you would feel him for days.

As he passed you the joint, he asked, “You gonna stop pretending you’re not interested now?” with that damned smirk on his face.

Trying and failing to suppress a smile, you rolled your eyes. “I guess.”

He grinned. “Good,” he said, rolling onto his side and drawing indistinct patterns on your stomach with his fingertips. “Cause you weren’t fooling anybody.” He winked. “I know I’m pretty.”

[kyogre-blue]

My best guess about the Agartha thing is that it has some combination of boring explanations that are just... not intuitive enough and not satisfying enough to be easy to keep track of.

Agartha's fall is thousands of years ago, and the entire continent seems to have been rendered nearly uninhabitable in the process. So it's not surprising Rhea and Seteth don't think anyone from that period survived and just assume some other evil cult came to power in the interim to manipulate things from the shadows. There can, logically, be more than one evil conspiracy other millennia. And the old time Agarthans were just humans with technology. They must have modified themselves to be bone white and also shapeshifters in the millennia since then, so of course Rhea and Seteth wouldn't have known about this unless they'd caught one doing it in the time between. Etc, etc.

This isn't even like... surprising, but because the Agarthans are the biggest villains of the setting AND get so much focus in school phase, it feels weird to keep track of how little almost everyone involved knows about them until basically the second to last map of the game. And then we can't even talk about it because the story is over now, I guess.

I actually really wonder about the Enbarr timeline, because Edelgard says at one point that the entire concept of nobility was established 1200 years ago, which seems to suggest that it was made by... Seiros? So like, are we supposed to take this as humans of the pre-Nemesis was period just lived in small tribes with little civilization or government and then Nemesis did a genocide, so Seiros elevated her allies into a proper city and nation and class structure and oops this bites her in the ass a thousand years later...??

In CF, Aymr - Edel's weapon - reveals its secrets, you cannot repair it using Umbral Steel, like other relics, but you have to use Agarthium to repair it. It's a made in Agartha relic copy.

Oh, interesting. Well, logically, it should be the same as zombie Nemesis's creator sword copy, since he uh... has one. Somehow.

I know I joke a lot about Edel's beef against Rhea'n'Sothis, tbh, after playing CF the "their ears are pointy they're not like us" argument felt like the strongest, but I'd be curious to hear what you think about it when you'll tackle CF.

I don't even know what to think, tbh.

On the one hand, the writing is SO blatant about it that I find it hard to believe the writers didn't realize that Edelgard was attributing Agarthan sins to the Church, whether she did this intentionally or out of pure ignorance. They had to know, right? It's meant to be irony, right??

But on the other hand, I always remember how, when Claude finally talks about Church Bad to people other than Byleth, they immediately agree with him and it's not even slightly meant to read as him manipulating them. So it's not that he has a bad take, it's that the writers think he's right.

So I feel like they might actually want to sell Edelgard as being right about Church Bad too...? But Edelgard is SO blatantly evil... I don't even know. I hate it.

Ah yes, that cutscene. She lets her feelings for her teacher take over her cold and emperor persona one last time or... tries to sway Byleth to her side until the end ? Or the devs really wanted to hammer the "feel sad for her" to sell more goodies/alts in fe heroes?

Since Edelgard basically makes no effort to sway you to her side before declaring war or during or in the five year reunion, and it's fairly clear she never believed you'd side with her, I don't think she's attempting to get you on her side, at least. (Especially since lol you get this scene even in VW where you have no support ranks on her.)

Seems to be just a "don't you feel bad for her" play, yeah.

I don't see Hubert as going behind her back, but Hubert wanting to spite Thales even in death, to the point of telling us where to find him to kill him.

I have a really sus view of Hubert, so I 100% believe he'd go behind Edelgard's back if he thought there was reason to do so. Not to her detriment, his obsessive devotion to her is real, but I get the impression that he doesn't necessarily think all that much of her judgement in the micro.

It's just... something, that he will spite-help Byleth+Claude (whatever) and also Byleth+Seteth and Church (Edelgard's most hated creatures) but NOT Byleth+Dimitri....? Hubert hates Dimitri more than anyone else, I guess. Or are we supposed to read it as Hubert thinking that, without Thales, the Agarthans aren't a threat anymore?

The route stuff is badly handled, is what I'm saying.

Quickly dumping out the Enbarr notes, since I'm sure the Shambhala section will have a ton of infodumping to note.

I think the only difference from VW is that we run some weird plan where a lot of our troops sneak into Enbarr ahead of the rest of the army moving in. Because uuuuh I guess we're weaker than the united army with Leicester? Everything else is pretty much exactly the same, including Dedue's part and the Edelgard death cinematic.

tbh I think it actually ends up feeling even weaker here? I thought it would fit better, since this is the "you like Edelgard but can't agree with her" route, but since she appears so little and her writing is so bizarre and confused... It actually feels kinda worse, since her dialogue feels incredibly inconsistent.

I thought I'd have some more appreciation for Edelgard after this route, but uh. I don't. Hm.

Anyway, onto more interesting points, I am starting to get the impression that Rhea and Seteth don't actually know much about the Agarthans. I think they might not actually know that the mysterious "those who slither in the dark" are from Agartha (and that's why they have beef), and it's basically explicit that they don't know who helped Nemesis make the Sword.

Which isn't an issue, but it's hard to remember that they know so little in practice.

Liveblogging:

A priestess mentions that they lost contact with all church personnel in Enbarr when the war started.

A soldier mentions that some of our troops have already departed for Enbarr dressed as merchants and traveling performers. We have an entire plan to have small squads sneak toward the capital and link up with the main army. The Empire apparently thinks we have abandoned our plans to invade (after Merceus).

Sylvain didn't think he's live this long (in the war)... bby. He wants to strike down the empire for Dimtri...

Apparently, we think Rhea is in Enbarr because of a soldier from Merceus. I guess Judith only told us that the Empire captured her. I already forgor.

The pre-battle blurb also mentions the troops moving in secret and our surprise attack on Enbarr. I don't recall this from VW. We were already outnumbered there, so I guess here with just the Church and Judith's troops, we're even worse off.

Based on the map close up during the pre-battle exposition, it looks like Enbarr was built on the delta where a river forks into two, with both ranches leading into the sea on the west.

Oh, Dedue is here! AC lied to me :( (/jk)

The music for his entrance is uh... imo it's a bit too heroic, given that he's here because Dimitri ended up like that.

He came after Gronder field, so... two months ago, since there was Merceus in between but not anything else. He gives us info on the inside of the castle (layout, presumably) and tells us that Rhea is at the palace.

Edelgard's axe, Aymr, is described as "a Crest Stone weapon designed to Edelgard's specifications, allowing her to use Raging Storm."

Edelgard's class, Emperor, is "With unparalleled defense, Edelgard appears as an unstoppable force in the legendary armor of the Adrestian Emperor." Note that her armor is a boobplate. So like... did they modify it for her, or....

Edelgard is so confusing. Even to the last, she goes on about how determined she is to "free this world" from the "vile grasp" of the "false goddess and her minion." But like... Edelgard has NO basis for beef with Sothis or Rhea. It's so puzzling and empty.

Dialogue with Seteth: He tells Edelgard to return Rhea and release her grip on Fodlan. Edelgard says that if we strike her down, "they" will return. So she can't permit what we desire (????? what? like, you'd assume she means the Agarthans, but everything else points to her talking about the Nabateans). She also knows that Seteth is a child of the goddess and thinks he can't be permitted power over the people. This is SO wild.

Anyway, to get this dialogue, I let Seteth get the last hit. The Edelgard death cutscene makes equally little sense on this route, btw. Edelgard was going "fuck you guys, I didn't think you'd make it this far, but I don't care and I'm never giving up" in the battle, but now she's all "you must strike me down to move forward, I wanted to walk with you..." GIRL WHAT

Hubert going behind Edelgard's back to write us a letter where he's basically entrusting the future and Fodlan to us is like....... l m a o This was whatever on VW, but on a route where we are the Church and those lizards Edelgard hates so much... god.

Anyway, Seteth apparently didn't really believe the Agarthans were behind all this, or else even around at all. He's very shocked and unhappy about Hubert's letter.

OK, unlike VW, where Claude is there for the info dumps and Rhea holds at least some stuff back, here she has no reason to hide anything. And she says she does not know where or how Nemesis got the Sword of the Creator. They only guessed that someone must have given him this power and tried to investigate it, but they never found the answer. They only NOW surmise that it was the Agarthans. ...hang on, do they even know that "those who slither in the dark" are from Agartha....

Felix and Sylvain are together at the monastery, cute. Felix even calls Dimitri by name when talking about defeating the Empire and the Agarthans to let him rest in peace.

Catherine backstory: She was born in House Charon in Faerghus > was called Thunderstrike Cassandra > attempted Officers Academy, was saved by Rhea as a student > was implicated in "a plot to kill the king" (seems to be Duscur) > fled to the monastery since she felt it was safe > Rhea hired her > and had her execute Christophe when he tried to assassinate Rhea, though the charges given publicly were regarding Duscur.

Is that right?

Anyway, next time: Shambhala

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

A Million Lives

https://www.patreon.com/empyreaniris?fan_landing=true

https://starr-fall-knight-rise.tumblr.com/post/182501791735/master-post

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jzEIdDAB4omdO2JcQVMObfrhLJ5kX4ONmSsLypM1ks0/edit?usp=sharing

Did he feel apprehension? 

Well, no.

Honestly he was beginning to wonder if he had some sort of identifiable medical condition that repressed his ability to feel fear. Then again, that wasn’t exactly true, he had felt fear before at least twice that he could think of. Once when he had almost died in an ice storm on an alien planet, and another time when he had almost lost his throne and his life to an adrenaline addiction, a fact that he was still deeply embarrassed about to this day. Other than those instances, however, he couldn't think of any other examples.

Still the looks of pity being passed to him by his escort did not go unnoticed.

A billion years?

Would this really be so bad? Had he truly gotten himself into something he couldn’t handle. 

He hoped not.

Maybe one of these days his bravado would come back to bite him in the ass. Maybe today was that day. The guards walked him briskly forward stepping sharply onto an elevator that had no buttons or dials. Symbols appeared in the air at the center of the elevator car along with a cool female voice.

“Seventh Ring.”

“You know, Ted Budy, Hitler, Mornix, and Geeanan are all on the seventh level too.”

“Mornix, huh.” Celex said as they began to move downward, “My great great great great great grandmother.”

“So psychopathy runs in the family I see.”

Celex shrugged, “I’m not a psychopath.”

The guards exchanged a look, “Really?”

He shook his head, “No, I care about those people back on the Empyrean, they’re my friends. I worry about them and I want them to succeed in battle.”

One of the guards snorted, “Or you see them as your property. Are you even capable of remorse, fear, sadness?” The question was accusatory, and the guard had clearly already made up his mind, so Celex don't stoop to answering the question. Didn’t stop him from thinking back to the incredible hurt he had felt when his primary wife betrayed him and set up her coup, the well of anger and sadness that had driven him, in a moment of rage, to destroy a planet just to get back at her.

No one should have that kind of paper, he was sure of that now.

And when that memory was gone he thought of the addiction and the fear that came with it.

Almost losing his life.

And finally, after his death, when he and Kelly had moldered together in darkness. He remembered the friendship they had established there held in each other’s arms to stave off the horror of the blackness. 

Had he shed a tear when they escaped?

Maybe 

Only he and Kelly would ever know the answer to that question.

The door dinged open, and they stepped out into the hallway, cool and grey and lined with prison doors. Didn’t look too intimidating, but it was really what was behind those doors that mattered.

The walk down the hall was a short one, turning towards the second or third door which opened with a soft hiss. The room inside was bright  white, forcing him to raise his hands and squint. When they finally adjusted he found himself looking in on a small, sparse room, white padded walls, a small cot in one corner, a sink, but no mirror, and at the center of the room, a chair.

Looked sort of like those chairs you'd find in a human dentists office,, or an electric chair you would find in a prison.

And with that chair, stood a beautiful woman.

She was tall,

Muscular 

Elegant.

And had a mane of technicolor hair, whose pattern he would have recognized anywhere, “Avix.” He snarled.

Ex Emperor Celex’s ex wife sneered in return, “You have no idea how much I am going to enjoy this.” Celex tried to dig in his heels, but the guards shoved him forward, unfortunately within Avix’s reach. She did not waste time, reaching out with one hand and grabbing him by the jaw, nails digging into either of his cheeks as she pulled him closer.

She squeezed hard, but he refused to make a sud glaring up at her with contempt.

“Don’t try to fight.” She said softly as the two guards retreated from the room, “WHile you are here, you are entirely within my power.” She made that fact clear a moment later with a little demonstration. A wave of ice washed through him, and before he truly understood what was happening, his body began to shrink arms receding, body morphing, until he dangled from her hand by his fur, feet dangling down and kicking helplessly as she held him.

She laughed as she watched him struggle, “I get now why the humans think we are so cute, tiny…. Helpless.”

He swung a foot at her, but that didn’t really do any good.

She let him struggle for a while, a lazy smile playing across her face, “As much as I am enjoying this moment the chair fits you better the other way. The cold ice receded from his body, and before he knew it he was back to his chosen form. She still held him by the hair, her fingers tangled through his roots, pulling at his scalp forcing him to bend over and twist.

She was enjoying this 

Having him in her power.

“Now I ghetto make you pay, for what you did to me.”

Celex snarled, “What I did to you I don’t regret, traitor.” her hand gripped harder but he didn’t stomp, “How was the ninth ring? Cozy I hope.”

She twisted even harder, bringing him to one knee, “You will not speak to me like that, not here.”

“Don’t go playing the victim card. You and I both know you were a power hungry bitch.” He tried tilting his head up to look at her, “But we both know I like that in a woman.” She gritted her teeth at him, “Should have known you were going to stab me in the back, after everything we had been through together.”

She laughed, “Please you had other wives to amuse yourself with, I was nothing important to you.”

He snorted, “The infidelity card only works when your species is monogamous, and you and I both know you had your own “amusement as it were”. As for being important to me, you were. I thought we had something, a similar goal.”

“And that is where you were stupid. I didn’t want to be your companion, I wanted to be emperor.”

“Should have been better then.”

She snarled, shivering him forward and into the chair.

He tried to turn but before he knew it she was already strapping one of his hands into place, 

“I am told, when the Makers designed the Celzex construct, it had the unique issue of causing something they referred to as rage bleed. In layman's terms it means that the celex construct was bad at containing the side of a soul that controlled rage. Construct biologists believe that’s why we were such a callous and warlike race, more so than the Drev or the humans.”

“There a point to this/” Celex grumbled.

“Yes,” She strapped his foot into place, before leaning forward over him. Her hands searched for the buckles over his chest, “It means, I am disappointed to see the true you, weak, unambitious.”

That stung, but he didn’t show her that.

“You’re just jealous I have people that actually like me.”

She laughed, “Your need for validation is amusing to me.”

She stepped behind him, slotting a small half circlet onto his head to rest against his temples, “This device is designed to channel memories and emotions into your brain.” She laughed, “I had to get the newest model in order to calibrate it to your request. The amount of information I will be forced to funnel into your mind is…. Well it definitely leans on the side of cruel and unusual, but you insisted, and I wouldn’t want to disappoint you.” She tapped the side of the device, “With this you will be able to feel and experience the lives of others as if they were your own simultaneously. At such a high rate of flow, this will probably tear your soul into little quivering pieces.” She grinned, “I look forward to watching the show.”

And then she pressed the button.

Celex could not have described in words what happened next, because no words could ever convey the sheer amount of pain and terror that followed. The fear of one, manageable, easy, but the fear of a couple billion stacked on top of each other all at once.

Incredible.

Unfathomable.

Terrible.

Over and over again, he felt the ground shake, the sky turn red. Violent death after violent death plagued him as the planet was ripped apart, billions trillions dying in a matter of seconds, but living just long enough to understand the apocalypse he had brought upon them. His very soul screamed, churned and attempted to escape as it was racked with a billion lives second after agonizing second. Celex had rarely experienced fear, but in that moment, he understood fear more deeply than any creature had ever truly understood because he felt it through the experiences of others.

And finally he realized.

He had never known fear, not in his life, not truly.

And when he thought it would be over, still it came in a torrent, racing through his mind and ripping him apart piece by piece. He couldn’t have screamed even if he wanted to scream, but he couldn’t find his mouth, and the screams of the dying weren’t enough to express the agony of fear and pain that followed.

The children’s fear was the worst, because it came with confusion, and the inability to understand what was happening. All he knew was that the end was coming.

How can one describe the feeling?

He was a glass, and the ocean had been poured into him all at once.

He was the singularity of a black hole, the center of a collapsing universe, an impossibly small point of mass with matter collapsing in around it.

He could not hold the memories, the cumulative experiences that in themselves added up to hundreds of thousands of years of experience, over and over and over again, his soul rubbed raw on sandpaper until there was nothing but a bloody smear left, infinite pain and suffering that seemed it would never end, go on to eternity until the very universe decayed away.

He could have been there for an eternity and he wouldn’t have known the difference.

He didn’t expect it to end.

But was surprised when it finally did.

All at once the pain was gone, and its sheer absence was a relief so incredible, it too could not have been described in words. Light filled his eyes, and for once he was not alone. The room above him was white, the walls around him white. He barely recognized the place, as a distant memory behind a wall of suffering and pain which was so poignant it was hard to see past.

Had he known this place.

He turned his head, looking up into the face of a woman who was barely familiar.

Her eyes were wide.

It was, hard to remember who she was, or where he was, but as the pain trickled slowly away he began to recognize things. She looked….scared, awed maybe, he couldn’t tell, but the pain was gone, evaporated, and behind it left a gaping chasm in his mind where he was unable to process what had occurred.

But still it was gone

Hot tears rolled down his face.

But with them came something else, a certain sense of urgency. He had to…. Help…. Someone?

He pulled at his bonds, “Let me go.:

The words felt foreign on his tongue, but the woman obliged, and it was to his surprise that he recognized her…. He had felt her. And then it came back to him, Avix, and with that realization followed other memoires, ones that were recent to his body if not his mind.

He was here to be punished

That was once his wife.

And there were others waiting for his help to save the universe.

He stumbled to his feet.

She stepped back.

He leaned heavily against the wall, feeling as if his very mind was bleeding, hemorrhaging like a civ, but then he began to laugh. She seemed quite unsettled, and as his laughter continued, two guards burst into the room, freezing in place and backing up as he straightened to his feet, familiarizing himself with the memories of the past few years, before the chasm in his head.

The tears did not stop, not even a little, but still the people who looked on him seemed unsettled 

Terrified.

He knew now

He shouldn’t have come out of that being able to think, remembering who he was at all, But…. he did.

And he knew who he was, and he knew what he had done..

But now…. He had paid for it.

And that made him very dangerous.

He stumbled past the guards and out into the hall, leading himself away, past everyone  who stepped back in shock and confusion, not daring to go near him. The more steps he took, the steadier he became slowly knitting the chasm in his head back together.

Remembering

Until he could almost pretend a thousand years had not gone through his head.

He stepped out into the docking bay watching the faces frozen in shock around him.

He was not supposed to have survived in tact.

Yet here he was, on his feet.

And ready to Kick apollyon’s ass. 

[escapenightmare]

WHEN SOMEONE ASKS THEM IF YOU’RE SINGLE.

― izuku, katsuki, denki, tamaki, shoto x gn!reader

cw. grammar issues probably notes. inspired by this post!

IZUKU knew the guy in the same aisle of the grocery store as you both were kept sneaking glances at you, and it did not sit well with him. when you went to another aisle to get cereal, izuku shuffled around putting the stuff you needed into the cart. the guy who was staring at you earlier walks up to him and asks, "hey, the person you were with, are they single?" the hold he had on the cart tightens and izuku bites his lip, "nope." "ah," the guy nods his head in understanding, "they are so cute i should've expected that." izuku watches him walk away and he sighs in relief, grinning when you come back and he kisses you making sure the guy saw, "what else do we have to get, baby?"

KATSUKI was sitting on a bench in the park, you had gone to throw away some napkins you'd used and your boyfriend, as observant as ever had noticed this random ass guy who was seated on the bench across from you two. while you were gone, the guy walks up to bakugou and sits next to him, asking him, "you know the person who was sitting here, right?" bakugou grunts, "yeah, what's it to you?" and he rolls his eyes when the guy asks, "are they single?" "no. they're my s/o, so fuck off before i make you." at bakugou's warning tone, the guy raises his hands up in defense before he stands up and leaves. bakugou tuts and when you get back, he takes your hand and doesn't let go until you go back home.

DENKI is genuinely confused when this random guy walks up to him, not a minute after you go to the café restroom and takes a seat on the chair you were sitting earlier. before he could tell the guy that the seat was already taken, the guy says, "the person who was sitting here, are they single?" furrowing his eyebrows, denki replies, "uh no? they're in a relationship with me," he says the last part with a certain amount of pride. even once the guy leaves, denki can't help feel awkward because, well, he's a naturally affectionate guy and he did keep holding your hand and looking at you with a pure smile that it was weird the guy didn't get that you were in a relationship. when you come back, he exclaims, "babe you won't believe what happened!"

TAMAKI is overwhelmed to say the least, when this total stranger walks up to him. what made tamaki even more nervous was the fact that he caught this stranger, a guy, sneak glances at you every few seconds a couple of times. the guy, smiles politely, "hey is the person you came here with single? cause they're really cute and i want to ask them out." tamaki literally shudders at the thought of you leaving him for this guy ― someone who was more outgoing and outspoken just as much as he was shy, from what he could tell. "u-um." tamaki couldn't speak and it's not until he hears you say, "i'm back my love!" that he actually starts breathing properly again. the guy just nods when he realizes you were in a relationship before he leaves, and tamaki is left to answer your question about who the guy was.

SHOTO saw the guy look at you a few times with a small smile and shoto was confused as to why this stranger did it. when you leave for a few minutes, the guy walks up to shoto as if they were friends and the red and white haired boy is even more confused when he asks, "the person who was just here. are they single?" shaking his head with furrowed brows, shoto says, "no. they're my s/o, did we not seem like we were together?" the guy backs up, "sorry, my mistake," before he leaves. and shoto is still sitting there, confused and as still as a statue when you get back.