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bellexmort-a · 5 years ago

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BELLEXMORT / BLOODYXBEAST’S FOLLOW FOREVER

so lately, i’ve been dealing with some stuff and i really just want to shout out some very important people in my / lydia’s / cam’s lives for being absolutely babes and being not only wonderful rp partners, but wonderfully spectacular humans. i’m grateful for ya’ll.

the first wives’ club:

@mieczlw : lea. you already know how important you are to me. almost ten years later and here we are. where’s the time go? when did we get so old, bitch? i can’t believe it’s already been 5 years since i’ve seen your face in person and i hate that for us. but anYWAY. you’re such a lovely person. inside and out. you keep on bein’ my friend and i really just don’t know what i did to deserve you in my life. despite me running away, you always keep me coming back to you. your stiles, love of lydia’s life just....perfection and excellence. but like mother like son....i guess kind of? idk work with me here. point being is that i love you with my whole ass heart, and wish you nothing but love and happiness always and forever. thank you for lovin’ me (thank u for bein’ there. EVERYBODY’S THANKIN.)

@claustrophobicwerewolf : lizzie bearrrrrr. my love my heart. another person who some how sticks around when all i do is throw crack at you. fr. i’ve seen you grow up basically and like WOW U STUNNAH. you’re not only a gifted writer, but you have a genuine heart and want to make the people you love and care about happy no matter what. you also give such life and love to isaac it just makes my heart so fucking happy. even when you’re hurting me with sparks and wires u fuckin twat. i can’t wait for you to come visit and let me kidnap you to nyc forever and ever and ever.

@codeworn : emmaaaaa. you’re just the lovliest. like? i am v fortunate that i have met you. you are crazy talented, crazy gorgeous, and always up for a fucking adventure. you throw literally everything at me and i do the same and its just a wild ride. i love it so much. you’ve been in my life such a short time, but i have already decided i am never letting you go. please never change, keep on being a bad ass allison, and a wild child of muses. it gives me such joy to see you on my dash, in my ask, on my discord, and just everywhere. you’re fucking amazing and don’t ever forget it.

@hiighking : bee bee bee. one of my first ever wives. MANY MOONS AGO in a land far far away, kaleb brought you to me and we have been friends ever since. my wife and my friend and sometimes my mom. literally the best of everything rolled up into one. you’re always there to remind me to take care of myself and make sure i’m alright when things are very much not. you know so much ab me and my life and have been there through MAJOR ordeals for me and somehow you like...still stick around? i’m sry ur stuck in that hell swamp but know that i love you lots.

husband harem:

@scartissuexx : t re n t. my wonderful bear husband. #1 husband in all the land. another person who has been in my life a short while, but i feel like i’ve know you for forever. the person who reminds me to hydrate every day, who checks up on me when things aren’t right. who keeps me sane and calm when i wanna kill everyone. who for WHATEVER REASON loves me basically unconditionally. i do not know what i did in my life to deserve you to be a part of it. you’re a strong as fuck person who takes no shit, and i adore that about you. you’ve gone through a lot and just like..... idk man daddy af and u know it. not to mention your derek. also the love of my / lydia’s / cam’s lives. you put so much love and care into him, and have basically torn him down to the studs and rebuilt him into what TW never could, what he honestly truly deserves. there’s such depth and fleshed out facets that every day i learn something new, and it’s never ending this journey of derek with you. i adore what you’ve done and keep doing with him. he’s a fucking asshole, but god do we love him. and you. always. let’s move to mars already. love ur bear wife.

@astrepur : kalebbbb. although i’m still heartbroken you left me for bee (doesn’t MATTER YOU WERE ALREADY DATIN WHEN U MET ME AND SHES THE LOVE OF UR LIFE. SHHH. IRRELEVANT.) i forgive u. i miss you a lot always and i know you know that. you also went through some shit with me and got me through a lot of my damaged bullshit and just. wow. such a strong, bad ass individual. you’ve been my husband for as long as i can remember. ok for like 10 years bc thats how long we’ve known each other but whatever. thank you for always being there no matter how long it’s been since we’ve talked. thanks for always returning my texts even when i’m being weird. thanks for the drunk facetimes with bee. thanks for being fucking you, because i wouldn’t be me without you and i rly want you to know that.

@lycanstark : n i k k o. you are just like. how to even begin with you babe? like just....i don’t even know how long we have known each other, i’ve honestly lost track. from the moment you and logan came into my life, it was like the best fucking thing. you’ve spent years keeping me sane more than you really know. another person i talk to basically almost every day. who listens to me bitch. who indulges me with weird crack AUs and pairings. who tortures me with elijah gifs cause she fuckin’ can like. fuck you for that honestly but whatEVER. you always remind me that things aren’t always gonna be shitty. that despite a ton of bullshit, good things (like our friendship) can last. and i really just adore and love you so much.

anyway here’s a thing about these fucking awesome babes that i will follow to the end of my days and ya’ll should too. thank you && goodnight.

#follow forever.#i fuckin love u all u awesome nerds #welcome to my follow forever here in the year 2012

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usergreenpixel · 3 years ago

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MALMAISON MEDIA SALON SOIRÉE 9: THE SECOND EMPRESS (2012)

1. The Introduction

Greetings, my dearest Neighbors. Welcome to today’s soirée here at the Malmaison Media Salon.

Tonight is a special gathering, mostly for two reasons. Firstly, I’m not the only host today - @maggiec70 , @joachimnapoleon , @josefavomjaaga and @count-lero were kind enough to agree to help me out. @suburbanbeatnik is also welcome to chime in, seeing as she writes historical fiction involving Napoleon so I trust her expertise as well.

Secondly, tonight we have a bingo night! Props to @tairin for suggesting that I turn this review into a bingo game. I already posted the images of your bingo cards and sent them to my mutuals in the Napoleonic community personally but, just in case, here they are:

These cards were designed by yours truly and you’re going to need them. Trust me.

The rules are simple. You just need to put a check mark on the square that corresponds to what you just heard. For example, check off “Inaccuracies” when I mention an inaccuracy. Okay?

Anyway, before we begin the bingo game, allow me to introduce the subject of today’s review. It’s a book published by Michelle Moran in 2012 and it’s called “The Second Empress”.

How did I stumble across this book? Actually, I must give credit to @maggiec70 , who suggested that I review it after Imperial Venus, as both the former and the latter feature Pauline Bonaparte as an important character.

Well, after reading the entire thing here, I’m extremely happy with my decision not to purchase it in any format and dig up a free online version instead. Let’s just say that annoying ads were the least of my problems while I was reading this shit, but we’ll get to that later.

Please, prepare to check things off your bingo cards, sip tea and demolish this motherfucking abomination.

Let the soirée commence!

2. The Summary

The following (lengthy) summary comes from Goodreads:

“After the bloody French Revolution, Emperor Napoleon’s power is absolute. When Marie-Louise, the eighteen year old daughter of the King of Austria, is told that the Emperor has demanded her hand in marriage, her father presents her with a terrible choice: marry the cruel, capricious Napoleon, leaving the man she loves and her home forever, or say no, and plunge her country into war.

Marie-Louise knows what she must do, and she travels to France, determined to be a good wife despite Napoleon’s reputation. But lavish parties greet her in Paris, and at the extravagant French court, she finds many rivals for her husband’s affection, including Napoleon’s first wife, Joséphine, and his sister Pauline, the only woman as ambitious as the emperor himself. Beloved by some and infamous to many, Pauline is fiercely loyal to her brother. She is also convinced that Napoleon is destined to become the modern Pharaoh of Egypt. Indeed, her greatest hope is to rule alongside him as his queen—a brother-sister marriage just as the ancient Egyptian royals practiced. Determined to see this dream come to pass, Pauline embarks on a campaign to undermine the new empress and convince Napoleon to divorce Marie-Louise.

As Pauline's insightful Haitian servant, Paul, watches these two women clash, he is torn between his love for Pauline and his sympathy for Marie-Louise. But there are greater concerns than Pauline's jealousy plaguing the court of France. While Napoleon becomes increasingly desperate for an heir, the empire's peace looks increasingly unstable. When war once again sweeps the continent and bloodshed threatens Marie-Louise’s family in Austria, the second Empress is forced to make choices that will determine her place in history—and change the course of her life.

Based on primary resources from the time, The Second Empress takes readers back to Napoleon’s empire, where royals and servants alike live at the whim of one man, and two women vie to change their destinies.”

Okay, I must admit now that the summary itself has breadcrumbs of slander and Anglophone propaganda more blaringly obvious than a neon sign, but let’s not jump to conclusions and unpack this, if only to see what “primary sources” contributed to the creation of said “masterpiece”.

3. The Story

Let’s start with the only thing that I liked about the story - its potential.

Propaganda aside, when you think about it, Marie-Louise was in a difficult situation in reality so I do like the idea of exploring what she had to deal with in a work of fiction. Although courtly drama usually isn’t my cup of tea in fiction, I can see the potential of such a story if it is given a good plot, good characters, good writing style, etc.

Unfortunately, the plot is definitely FAR from good. Multiple inaccuracies aside, it was insufferably boring to me, with flashbacks, filler scenes and the unnecessary inclusion of letters between the historical figures ruining what little immersion I had and making me want to drop the book completely.

The pacing doesn’t help, because it’s slower than a pregnant sloth and, to me, all the attempts to add action (in the form of a love triangle) fall flat quickly.

Plus, with time the happy ending for Marie-Louise (as in, Napoleon being exiled for good and her return to Austria to be with her lover) just becomes more and more predictable! Of course she will get her happy ending and of course the “villains” in her life will lose! Well, that was anticlimactic...

The stakes aren’t exactly there most of the time and it’s really hard to be concerned about the heroine due to this fact. Why should I give a shit if I know everything will work out for her in the end?!

I also hate the fact that the author chose to adopt a “black and white” morality for the story.

The protagonists may as well be candidates for canonization by the Catholic Church, while the antagonists feel almost like cartoonishly evil bad guys from a Disney movie.

We’ll talk more about portrayals of characters later, so here I will only add that, most of the time, the “good vs bad” approach isn’t really fit for historical fiction as a genre.

Heck, even some children’s cartoons know better than do that, so I’m genuinely surprised that this is the approach that a book clearly aimed at a much older audience uses. And by “aimed at adults”, I’m referring to the fact that it has scenes with nudity, an all but stated outright sexual assault and all that fun stuff, so the childish morality really looks out of place in something that is trying to tackle such mature topics.

Oh, and the love triangle between Pauline, Paul (the chamberlain) and de Canouville (Pauline’s lover)? Totally unnecessary sideshow that didn’t need to be there in the first place. And it especially didn’t need to almost end in a duel between the two men but it fucking did. Yay, melodrama... Check it off your bingo cards, everyone.

4. The Characters

Okay, let’s begin with Marie-Louise, the protagonist.

She starts out as someone forced into a difficult and awkward situation, what with being supposed to marry a monarch of the country in which her great aunt got executed and the groom having a horrible reputation because it’s none other than Napoleon himself!

However, the potential to make Marie-Louise a somewhat tragic character is quickly thrown out the window when the author goes out of her way to make her heroine into a perfect saintly angel.

Marie-Louise is hardly ever wrong, she never fucks up, she is almost universally loved by everyone (except the bad guys of course) and, of course, she gets a happy ending.

So, basically our Saintly Marie-Louise ™️ is a textbook case of a Mary Sue character - a character who is perfect in every way, never wrong, almost universally adored, etc. She might also be the author’s avatar and a way to express the author’s views on the historical figures portrayed, but I’m not sure if there is a case of a self-insert at play.

Napoleon.... oh boy. Look, my dear Neighbors, I’m going to preface with the fact that I don’t like him at all, but the levels of demonization he is put through in the book make me feel bad for the guy, which is a big fucking achievement!

In this book, Napoleon is explicitly stated to be unable to love anyone but himself, not even either of his spouses or his own son. He is close with Pauline, but doesn’t seem to care about her all that much either.

He quickly does away with all his charm as soon as Marie-Louise is with him after he gave her the official welcome, shows exactly what he thinks of her by calling her “a birthing cow”, yells in the presence of his toddler son to toughen him up... The list of the misdeeds of Napoleon the Tyrant ™️ continues, but all of this is nothing compared to the stunt he pulls during the wedding night.

(Dearest Neighbors, here’s a trigger warning because the description of the following scene implies assault. Please click away if you don’t want to read this.)

Here’s the deal. So, we have the wedding night and the marriage must be consummated. Marie-Louise is too tired, however, and refuses to undress when Napoleon orders her to do so. Yet he repeats the order and bangs her anyway! Yes, I’m being serious. In this book, he shags his wife without her consent.

I... WTF did I just read?! I wish I was joking when typing all of the above, but nope. I wasn’t. And I regret ever reading this...

Napoleon isn’t the primary villain though, believe that or not. That role goes to Pauline.

Throughout the story, Pauline is portrayed as a possessive femme fatale who is in love with Napoleon and wants him all to herself. Yes, in that way. It’s basically incest here, which is apparently an old chestnut when it comes to lies.

She wants to rule Egypt together with Naps, she does everything in her power to make other women in his life feel inferior to her and is shown to be on her way to becoming outright delusional towards the end.

Oh, and she is ambitious. Ambitious enough to protest her newborn nephew’s status as King of Rome because she wants Rome for herself (even though the real Pauline wasn’t about politics, from what I know).

The author seems to employ a lot of tactics to show how tyrannical and evil (and later delusional) Pauline is, up to the point where, in one scene, she uses one of the ladies serving her as a footstool and dresses her servants as Egyptian slaves. I don’t even know how true it is in the swarm of all the lies, but that scene is clearly there to demonstrate that Pauline is evil and just as bad as her brother.

Paul, Pauline’s Haitian chamberlain, has a much more interesting character arc in the beginning so I would rather read a book about him. He is a mixed race young man who is in love with Pauline and loyal to her until she becomes so evil he can’t tolerate her company and runs off to Haiti, so to me his character felt wasted and the resolution of his arc is a bit too boring. Add the love triangle, and the impression that this character was flushed down the drain along with his potential only amplifies. Shame, really. I kind of like him as a character.

Caroline Murat gets a treatment only slightly better than what her siblings do so she is still slandered.

*Laure Junot has entered the chat*

She is portrayed as a callous, miserable woman who is arrogant with Marie-Louise, is extremely cruel and insensitive when the latter has to leave her dog behind and even wonders why anyone would love a pet. I honestly expected Caroline to kick that dog with how overboard the author’s portrayal of Caroline and Pauline as callous bitches went!

Murat himself, fortunately, doesn’t get slandered but this could be because he only makes a brief cameo. Still, the first impression he has on Marie-Louise is pleasant enough for her to wonder how Murat could be married to Caroline...

Aside from Murat, other characters who don’t get slandered include Hortense. And here she is idealized like Marie-Louise!

They apparently become friends when Hortense is made Marie-Louise’s Mistress of the Robes despite the fact that Hortense is already the Queen of Holland here so she can’t be a lady-in-waiting, making the plot point illogical.

(In reality, Marshal Lannes’s second wife was Dame of Honor to Marie-Louise, but here that woman only makes a brief cameo and is largely left out because the author forgot about her.)

But, all that aside, Hortense is also portrayed as a victim of the cruel Napoleon, the sweetest person ever who was married off to a cruel tyrant of a husband, etc. Oh, Poor Sweet Hortense ™️! 🙄

When it comes to minor characters, I kind of like Metternich, even though I’m not sure how accurate his portrayal is. He is nonchalant, weirdly enthusiastic about Marie-Louise’s wedding and he is implied to be having an affair with Caroline Murat. He is also the one who helps Marie-Louise prepare for her life with Napoleon.

Josephine doesn’t appear and is only mentioned, so I can’t make very accurate judgement on her.

Unfortunately almost every character is smeared with slander so let’s move on.

5. The Setting

Can’t judge the accuracy of costumes and buildings described here, but the descriptions fail at immersion and there are tiny inaccuracies that just make things even worse.

For example, Napoleon is described as having a cup of orange flower water each morning, while in reality orange flower water was mainly used with recipes or drank as a spoonful of tonic to aid with digestion. Supreme Being knows what else is inaccurate, but research has clearly left the chat.

6. The Writing

Oh god, the writing style is atrocious like in a bad fanfiction! There’s a first person present tense narration, which is annoying and sounds like characters are just voicing what they’re doing on the go, making things sound unnatural with this writing style.

There are also gems like Marie-Louise, a Hapsburg princess mind you, saying “What the Hell”, a phrase that would be more appropriate for a commoner or a drunk soldier than her. But at least she isn’t dropping f-bombs.

And also the narration is littered with unnecessary long descriptions of how characters look, their dresses, flashbacks of their backstories and inclusions of letters in their entirety. Like I said, it only breaks immersion and feels completely unnecessary so I don’t understand why all those elements are in the book.

Other than that, though, at least the language used in the writing is comprehensible.

7. The Conclusion

Phew, it’s finally over! As you may have guessed, I would NEVER ever recommend this book. Not just due to propaganda, but also the horrible style, flat characters, wasted potential and an oversimplified, overstretched story.

Okay, it’s time to end our bingo night here at Malmaison Media Salon. You can keep the cards and help yourselves to food and drinks as a reward for sitting through the review of such a monstrosity.

As for me, I gotta go now, but I will post updates soon so please stay tuned.

Your Neighbor,

- Citizen Green Pixel

#history #napoleonic art #napoleonic literature #napoleonic media #napoleonic era #napoleon bonaparte #pauline bonaparte #caroline murat #marshal murat #prince metternich #empress marie louise #the second empress #michelle moran #malmaison media salon #literature review

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atlantablack · 2 years ago

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hiii<3 for the siken ask game, 12. you were drinking sangria and i was throwing oranges at you.

Prompt 12 - you were drinking sangria and i was throwing oranges at you. (which is from I Had a Dream About You, if anyone was wondering)

Heyyy bestieee, pls enjoy this, quite frankly, strangely soft fic my brain gave me for you <3 for the song lyric additions, this is also on Ao3

•

The first year is the worst. Steve had expected that though, so it’s okay. Of course, the first year would be the worst. How could it not be when Bucky had spent so long in Hydra’s grasp, unable to even remember that he’d once had his own life.

Unable to remember Steve.

This is of course the part that stings the most, even if, in the grand scheme of things, it is the least important part.

•

The second year Bucky disappears, again, and Steve punches a hole in the wall of Tony’s gym. He doesn’t follow, as much as he wishes to. He knows Bucky, even if Bucky doesn’t know him. Which means, that he knows Bucky needs the space even if kills Steve to give it to him.

So, instead of following, he fixes the hole in the wall, goes on missions with Natasha, lets Tony teach him how to, properly, navigate the internet, and goes running with Sam. He breathes in, breathes through, receives a postcard from India seven months later, breathes deep, and breathes out.

•

The third year, Bucky comes back, and for the first time since 1945, Steve and Bucky hug. It goes on for far longer than they ever used to allow themselves to indulge. But Steve’s hands have forgotten how to unclench and Bucky is shaking apart underneath his fingertips.

The sky could collapse and he thinks he would stay standing right here, content to die if it meant forever in Bucky’s arms.

They let go eventually. Of course. But Bucky stays close and Steve does his best to stay steady.

•

The third year is hard. Easier than the first, but a challenge in and of itself.

For all that he’d thought to himself, I know him, he does in fact, know very little about this new version of Bucky. And as it turns out, Bucky knows very little of Steve, even with a large portion of his memories once again intact.

They’d both lived and died and lived again, their personalities shifting, mercurial things that no longer match up quite the same.

It doesn’t stop them from clinging to each other but it forces them to, in a way, start again. It feels a little like a curse and a lot like a second chance. A fresh sheet of paper, free of charcoal smudges and dirty fingerprints, just waiting for a masterpiece to be painted in bright, vivid watercolors.

•

The fourth year is the easiest so far, both of them settled into their skin and more confident of where they stand, both, with each other, and in this new time.

Steve had woken up in 2012 and had thought, I will never belong to this era, I will never learn to enjoy this. He’d also thought that he was alone, and maybe the absence of that loneliness is what makes all the difference. Or maybe it is simply that he’s finally accepted that he’s here to stay.

What is the point of being miserable when he can build a home and finally live? What is the point of courting tragedy when some higher power allowed Bucky to find his way back to Steve?

He thinks life is offering him a gift. He would be a fool to not grab it with both hands.

•

The fifth year they leave Stark Tower and return to their roots. A three bedroom brownstone in the heart of Brooklyn, the cobblestone signing beneath their feet, welcome home, welcome home.

Bucky kisses him in the archway and he smiles into it, throws his keys at Natasha when she snickers, and throws rice over them, making a mess all over their brand new floor. He can’t stop smiling, and thinks maybe one day, she’ll have a chance to throw the rice for real. Somewhere green, somewhere warm, both of them endlessly tired of the cold.

They turn their home into an oasis of warmth. A burgundy couch and sunset pillows. A rug shaded like the sunrise and kitchen walls like sunshine. The plants take up every window and Bucky spends hours tending to them, talking in a low voice to them as if they can drag the darkness from him. Maybe they can, he always seems lighter afterward, flushed bright with life.

There’s fresh fruit on the counter and warm bread in the oven. Coffee in the cupboard despite how little it does for either of them.

Bucky takes to making sangria, despite alcohol doing nothing at all for him. Says, I like the taste, I like the colors, what other reason do I need?

Steve bites into an orange, the taste bursting across his tongue, and watches a drop of sangria roll bright red down the column of Bucky’s throat. He throws a second orange across the table, laughs when Bucky catches it too hard and ends up with orange juice sticky in his hair.

“I’ll help you wash it out,” he says, like that hadn’t been his plan from the start.

Bucky grumbles about it, but he still leans in when Steve leans across the table to kiss him. He tastes like sunshine and the ocean and a thousand nights of longing. Which is to say, he tastes like the only religion that Steve has never lost faith in.

fin.

#stucky #tag meme #eva tag #atlanta writes #i don't go here #except i guess when it comes to emotionally harming friends I do go here

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glacial-snowflakes · 4 years ago

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Subtle hum of the Hudson River - part 2 // Loki

A/N: Hi darlings! I'm sorry for not posting but I kind of don't have that much time rn :( I'm so so sorry! I hope you like it! <3

Here is part 1

Pairing: Loki x fem!reader

Word count: 2,5k

Summary: You and Loki take a stroll down the river, letting yourself be honest with each other. The words you spoke have an unexpected result.

WARNINGS: it's all fluff, don't you worry!; parts written like this are retrospection

Likes, comments, and reblogs are greatly appreciated. It’s really motivating <3

Outrage and disgust filled every little whisper he heard. The team's looks were so sharp that they could cut one's skin open. Sighs full of hatred. Snarky remarks, supposedly innocent, yet hurt like hell. Why would anyone care about God of Mischief? Yes, he might live in the Tower, and yes, he might call himself one of the Avengers now, but he would never belong. Never. Not after what he did.

"They will never trust me, won't they?" Loki asked Thor, his sight focused on a cup he was holding in his frozen hands. The tea wasn't hot anymore. It went cold just like his heart that had never known the warmth of love. Trickster raised his eyes to meet Thor's. God of Thunder could swear that for a moment, he saw despair painted onto his brother's pale face. "I thought you didn't care about them nor their attitude towards you."

"I don't." The raven-haired man said immediately but seeing his brother's smile made him speak the truth. "I hate the way they look at me. I know what I did, and I deserve it. It's just— Nevermind." Loki sighed and took a sip of his cold tea. Speaking about his feelings was never his strong suit. Opening up to someone and spilling his guts felt like a nightmare he didn't want to experience at all costs. Runaway was the best choice.

"If you want to gain their trust, start with Lady Y/N. She's the most perfect for being the first one to break the ice with. Believe me." Thor gave his brother a clap on the back and nodded. "Go on."

"She's holding a knife right now. I am the one who stabs, not the one to be stabbed." Loki muttered. Thor's look said everything. In response, God of Mischief just rolled his eyes, stood up, and slowly approached you. You seemed so focused on the meal you were preparing that you didn't even notice him at first. He cleared his throat. "Lady Y/N."

You snapped out of the trance you were in just a few seconds ago. You lifted a knife you were holding in your hand. It was all covered up in ice, even sharper than the kitchen utensil itself. You held it up in front of your face as you were breathing rather heavily, scared of the sudden voice that made you come back to earth with a bump. Loki could swear that for a moment, your eyes turned impeccably white, just like the snow you could summon whenever you wanted.

"I— I'm so sorry, I didn't want to scare you. I truly mean it." Loki said immediately, waving his hands, the visible awkwardness painted onto his face.

"No, no! It's not your fault." You smiled to assure him that everything was fine. "Whenever I'm cooking, I'm in a trance. Just me, food, my mind free of all the bad thoughts that have been haunting me." You waved your hand in which you were holding a knife, and the ice melted away, just like that, not leaving any mark behind. Loki gave you a subtle nod and asked. "What are you cooking?"

"Oh, I won't tell you." You blurted out, which was followed by the awkward silence. "It's because I'm making my secret dish. Y/N's secret delicacy. No one knows what's inside except me." You explained in the blink of an eye. Loki seemed to be a little bit confused. Oh boy, you weren't good at small talks either. "If you want to, you can stay and sit here. We can talk about whatever you want or, if not, we can sit there in silence. It depends on you."

A sweet, delicate smile appeared on your face. You knew it was hard for Loki. You could see that. You noticed these quick looks he was giving whenever someone whispered his name. You noticed his need to be included when you were in a group, but everybody seemed to be ignoring him. Nobody wanted him to participate in meetings or conversations. He was in a crowd, yet he felt like he was all by himself. You saw all of this, and it made you feel bad. You knew what he did, but in the end, he was one of you now. Every god could bleed, and it hurt you to watch.

You wanted to make the raven-haired man feel better. Even if you were the only one to do this and every other person was about to judge you, you wanted Loki to feel included, to feel important. You promised yourself that it would be YOU who will make Loki feel welcomed, welcomed in a place where everyone pushed him away.

"Can I ask what your exact powers are?" Loki started the conversation, and you couldn't help but smiled. He truly wanted to talk with you. How adorable.

"I'm a demigod with cryokinetic powers. It would take a lot to talk about my abilities, but I will tell you that my favorite one is making ice daggers. Quick and simple, though it took some time to master the perfect shape." You chuckled. "Learning to aim ideally in a battle to cut through a chest and freeze someone's heart was the most problematic part."

"I didn't know you are so violent and tough."

"I am not... I guess I pretend to be." You said quietly, not looking upon a cutting board. A deep sigh escaped your mouth. "You know, it's not a job for everyone. Sometimes I'm too gentle for that."

You didn't let the silence last forever, as you immediately asked. "How do you find yourself here? Do you like the Tower?"

"Ah, you know... It has changed since the last time I visited." Loki said, clearly ashamed of all the damage he did back in 2012. Till these days, the thought of the Chitauri ravaging New York gave you the shivers. It was a very demanding and traumatizing first day of work as the Avenger.

"A renovation was a must." You joked; to clear the air and shoo away the atmosphere that was creeping towards you. "What about your room?"

"If you can call a small couch in Thor's bedroom my room, then I guess it's okay."

"You sleep on Thor's couch?" It was something that surprised you and not in a good way. You got that Loki wasn't everyone's favorite member, but there was a ton of empty bedrooms in the Tower in which he could live.

The God of Mischief nodded. "It's not that bad."

"I don't care. I will talk to Tony. You have to have your own bedroom. It's not like you can sleep on his couch forever. It's not comfortable in the long run." Loki opened his mouth to say something, but you cut him off. "I've got it covered, don't worry."

There was something in talking to you that made Loki feel at home. The way you looked at him; gave him the sweetest and prettiest smiles he has ever seen. There was no hate in your voice, no disgust that he's been experiencing on a daily basis since he could remember. You actually treated him like a human being, despite everything he has ever done. There was only one person he knew with such a kind heart, and you reminded him of her; you reminded him of Frigga.

"You know..." Loki begun. "I feel like you are the only one that doesn't want to cut my throat or stab my heart with my dagger."

You smiled gently. "I think you deserve a second chance."

"And why is that?"

"This is a story for another time."

***

"Where do you think you two are going?" Tony asked when you and Loki approached the elevator. God of Mischief gave him a quick stare before pushing the button with an arrow pointing down. You turned your head to face Tony, who was making himself a coffee. "We're going on a walk." You answered with a smile on your face.

"It's almost midnight."

"Said a man with a cup of coffee in his hand." You chuckled. "We're going to be fine. He's a god, and I'm a demigod. Nothing bad will happen to us."

You knew that it wasn't you who Tony was worried about; he still didn't trust Loki. When you joined the Avengers, you were one of the youngest in the group. Fresh blood, you could say. Stark watched you growing from an impulsive, careless kid with ice powers to a deliberate adult, a demigod aware of her cryokinetic strength. Seeing you change over the years, he felt responsible for your life. Even if Man of Iron knew you could handle yourself, Loki was too powerful. Tony refused to believe in his change, and with it, he was afraid that the Trickster was purely playing with you. If only they saw Loki as you did.

A few minutes later, you two were strolling down the New York. Just you, Loki, and the subtle hum of the Hudson River that made your troubled hearts feel at peace. Slowly paced steps. Your knuckles barely brushing each other woke up armies of butterflies in your stomachs that went on war. If you were bold enough, you would grab his hand in yours and intertwined your fingers together, holding him like it was the end of the world. It was something you truly wanted from the moment Thor brought him into the group.

"So..." Loki cleared his throat. "If you want to, we can talk or, if not, we can walk in silence. It depends on you."

"I'm not ready, not yet... I'm sorry."

"Don't you ever be sorry for not being ready to talk about your feelings, Lady Y/N." Loki grabbed your wrist and made you stop your steps. "Ever, okay?"

Something was mesmerizing in his beautiful eyes and a worried smile. Something that made your heart beat faster; palms get sweaty and clammy. Something that made you agree to everything he said. It was like a trick, but not like the ones he did from time to time to piss of Thor or Tony. No.

You snapped out of it and nodded. "Okay." You said and took your wrist from his hand. You began to walk again with Loki by your side when he asked. "Lady Y/N. A few months ago, I had asked why I deserve a second chance. You'd never gave me an answer. I'd still like to know."

You smiled, looking at the tiny waves on the river. "I knew you'd asked that sooner or later. I think I can finally tell you why I think this way." Your eyes focused on his face now. "Okay... Let me tell you something. It's not a surprise that you've made some pretty bad decisions in your life, and you've hurt a lot of people. You think you're a monster, and you don't deserve to be loved. You were never more wrong.

"In this group, you probably won't find one spotless person. We are people that made huge mistakes. You don't have to look far." You grabbed his hand without thinking. It was an impulse that just felt right. "I was a reckless kid when I got these powers. No one was there to guide me through them, learn how to be in control. And to a bullied kid like me, it was something that made me feel better than others. I was the one on the top. With my mortal mum that couldn't handle the demigod kid and my godly father that had so many half-blood children he didn't give a shit about, no one could stop me. The bullied became the bully. I don't like to call myself that, but this is true. I went through hell, and I made sure they felt the same way. I'm not proud of it, but that is who I was.

"So you have me. And then there's former HYDRA's witch, a billionaire who made deadly weapons, former Russian spy, former HYDRA's most famous brainwashed assassin and etcetera. Welcome, you're just as messed up as we are. Being here with us is your chance to become a better man. You belong here, Loki. Trust me."

At that moment, something broke inside of him. For a second, he stopped being a mysterious, private God of Mischief that didn't want to let in anybody. He let go of all the concerns and worries that had been occupying his mind for far too long. He threw away the image of a monster he considered himself to be.

The words you spoke made him realize that as long as you were next to him, there was nothing he couldn't do. You were the key to his pure heart from the beginning. You were the answer he'd been looking for all along. You were the light that could sweep away the darkness that'd been consuming him from within, and he wanted you to shine beside him forever.

When Loki leaned over to your ear, all you could feel was his warm, shaky breath on your neck that sent the shivers down your spine. "Don't hate me for this." He whispered almost inaudibly as his hands found their way to your hips. His long, lean fingers quite roughly pressed onto your skin. Just like electricity, his touch pierced through your whole body, made your knees get weaker. Your senses were fogged, almost like you were under control. All you could focus on was how his mellowy soft lips felt against yours. The kiss was sweet and passionate, yet gentle at the same time. It wasn't hasty and rough like you'd expect it to be, no. There was something else, something special about it. It was Loki's way to describe every little feeling he had for you. Your adorable smiles you'd been giving him, slight touches you didn't even think he noticed, tea and sympathy. It was all for what he wanted to return the favor.

For a moment, you weren't sure if this was real. Was it just a pure imagination of your mind that was thirsty for love and affection? Or maybe it was a trick, fake reality that you'd fallen for so naively? No, it couldn't be. You could feel it. Feel your heart crazily pounded like it wanted to escape the cage in which it was held for far too long. It was the only thing that helped you stay sober.

You didn't want to stop this. You wanted to stay in this moment forever, scared that once it ended, it would never come back.

"Loki..." You started when you two pulled out to catch a breath. "I could never hate you for making my dreams come true."

The raven-haired man didn't say anything. In response, he wrapped his arms around your still weak body and brought you even closer, so there was no space left between you and him. You felt his chin gently placed on the top of your head. With a smile on your face, you embraced him tightly and snuggled your face onto his chest. All that you heard was his heart pounding fast in the same rhythm as yours, as the subtle hum of the Hudson River accompanied your feelings growing for each other at that moment.

tag: @handmaiden-of-mischief @amiechuchu

#loki x y/n #loki x reader #loki x you #loki imagine #loki oneshot #loki fanfiction #loki fanfic #loki #loki laufeyson imagine #loki layfeyson x reader #loki layfeyson x you #loki laufeyson #loki x female reader #avengers x y/n #loki x avenger reader #avengers x you #avengers x reader

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vintage-marina · 4 years ago

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A woman out of time chapter 3

TW: violence, fighting, suicidal thoughts

Wordcount: 2894

Summary: Reader meets James Norrington for the first time

The Black Pearl

The man had his eyes wide open and some spit flew out of his mouth onto your helmet. You furrowed your brows and tried to make as much space between the strange man and you if that was possible, another head came into your field of vision. He was on the top of his head bald but for some reason he still had hair, he was also dirty. "Hmm, she doesn't look like a witch. So I say you're wrong!'' he didn't stared at you anymore but stared at the other man, his face a few centimeters from the other man. ''No Pintel, she is! I swear on my soul'' ''You don't have one, how could you swear on it?'' ''Because I can!''

Around you you heard murmers and sighing in irritation you said: ''Excuse me,'' they were ignoring you and didn't move a muscle while their staring contest was contuining. You lifted your arms and pushed their heads away, the wood underneath you was creaking while you tried to stand up. Around your arm clung a net and you tried to shrug it off. Hearing the sound of metal made you realise that you were in a dangerous situation, you could see men pointing their guns at you or pointing other weapons. You saw what the others were wearing and you felt ridiculous, it was certain that you were not from here or from this timeline. You wished that you could reach for your weapons, but they were safely tucked underneath your timetravel suit. You had two options or you pressed on a button and revealed your normal suit that may scare those people around you or you keep this suit on and may risk a heat stroke.

A man was staring at you and had his hands in the air. It was like that he was doing this pose alot, when he noticed that you noticed that he was staring he walked right at you. His arms swung at his sides and he kept staring at you and for the dramatic affect he pulled his eyebrows up. What the hell am I even doing here, you thought to yourself. A meter from you he stopped and he pulled his face toward you and knocked on your helmet. ''Strange thing, don't ya think?'' ''Thanks'' ''No problem lass, what's yer name?'' ''Why do you want to know?'' ''What do ya say?'' You pushed on a button that revealed your face and said it again, his eyes widened in shock but recovered quickly, around you you could hear gasps ''Well can't a gentlemen know the name of a beautiful woman like you hmm? Especially from a beaut like you that fel from the sky, I could almost swore that ye're an angel'' ''It's nurse Y/L/N'' the man with eyeliner smirked and said: ''Yer given name nurse Y/L/N'' ''Y/N, yours?'' ''Captain Jack Sparrow ma'am.'' The first thing that you noticed is that he looked familiar, you squinted your eyes lightly and said to him: ''Do I know you from somewhere?'' ''Well lass if that was the case then I wouldn't ask from yer name, wouldn't I?'' He had a point, the second thing that you noticed is that he had a compass in his hand. You hummed in agreement, while you looked around you saw that the other men (probably the crew from the man that was facing you) were whispering to eachother and looking frightened but still pointing their guns and weapons. In the crowd you spotted a few women, they also pointed their guns at you but the anxious pit in your stomach was lessening while you saw them.

You turned your focus to his crew and said ''Look I'm not here to hurt you and I hope you are not going to hurt me. It was an accident that I landed here and it was not on purpose, I know that you guys have a lot of questions right now and I will answer it if you guarentee that I'm safe here and can stay. Because I have nowhere else to go.'' the man who you learned his name was Jack shrugged his head and said: ''Fair enough, welcome on the Black Pearl lass'' while he said this you heard his crew protesting. What have I done to myself? ''Now if you will, come with me.''

An older man with a beard walked towards Jack and mumbled: ''Jack I know I shouldn't question you, but I don't think it's a good idea to welcome her on this ship'' You rested your hands on your hips and said: ''You know I can hear you right?'' He ignored you. ''Well that's why I'm in charge isn't it'' and he gave a smile towards the old man. ''Alright then name's Joshamee Gibbs and yours?'' and he held his hand out for you to shake it, you shaked his hand and gave a tight lipped smile ''Y/N Y/L/N.'' ''Now if you don't mind I'm interested in your story so follow me''

You were walking towards his cabin, you admitted his ship was beautiful. He gestured that you could sit down, so you did. You layed your hands in your lap and you asked yourself if you should start or should wait. ''Rum?'' he offered you, ''yes, thank you.'' He gave you a glass of rum and you put it on the table. He sat on the other couch facing you again and you saw that he was bursting from curiosity. ''So, should I start?'' Jack nodded and you continued: ''Alright then, I really don't know where to begin. But what I'm saying should be kept a secret forever and if I know that it's made publicy I'm seriously pissed, you anderstand me?'' ''Aye, me and our crew will keep it a secret,'' ''good.'' ''Alright now I'm starting,'' you took a deep breath and began. ''The world where I came from is in shambles. You probably won 't believe it but an evil creature wiped out half of our population on earth, because it wasn't in 'balance' according to him.'' ''Hold up, an evil creature what do you mean by that? And what do you mean by wiped out half of the population, who could do that?'' ''An alien, extraterrestrials or someone who isn't born on Earth it self. We never thought that anyone could do this, until Thanos came along.'' he choked on his drink and said: ''What the hell mate, ye're saying that those things excist! I never heard of the word alien.'' he mumbeled the last sentence. ''Truth to be told, I didn't believe it either. Until I saw those things, they were disgusting and that man, he was the scariest of them all. I don't even know why I am telling you this, you probably would stab me in the back with this story.'' ''Eh.. probably, but for now not. Ye're telling this because if you didn 't you would look crazy and we would kick you out of our ship and we don't care where, so that's why. But ye're secret is safe with us, if that is what ye're worrying about lass. Now go on with your story, I want to know what happend next.'' You took your glass of rum and sipped it a bit, it was strong but even the strongest liquor in the world couldn't make you drunk and so you explained why you were here.

''So ye're saying that ye 're from the future, precisely 2023.'' ''Yes that's what I'm trying to tell you,'' ''and you wanted to go to 2012 because..'' ''Because for bringing the people back who were snapped away we needed the Infinity Stones.'' Jack nodded with his head, trying to understand it. ''Whoa, the only thing I can say is whoa'' ''Yeah, I know it's a lot to take in,'' he pointed with a finger and said: ''And you need an Infinity Stone but you can't switch timelines because you have one Pym Particle right? So, you have to search for this 'Infinity Stone' in this time, am I right lass?'' ''Yes you 're completely right, Jack.'' ''It's captain for you lass if you don't want to be kicked out of my crew.'' You let out a laugh and said: ''Alright captain.'' ''I still can't believe ye're from 2023, ya know how many years from now that is?''

Captain Jack Sparrow showed you the way to the womens barracks because although he was a pirate, women did deserve privacy. His arm slung over your shoulder and he said: ''Wait here will ya? I'm going to tell my crew what's goin' on. You will sleep here with the others by the way.''

The following days the crew was becoming less and less suspicious of you but the questions didn't ceaze. They were asking why you were here, how you were here, why the hell you didn't return to your time, who's you engaged to, why you always looked tired and questions about your past that you wern't comfortable with answering. You were sewing torn up clothing while you peered into the horizon, the weather was cold, misty and the night slowly climbed up at the horizon. A shiver ran through your spine. Luckily you wore you leather suit but the other's couldn't say the same. Your thread fel out of your needle and you cursed lightly, your cloved hands picked up the thread and you shut one eye close to focus better on the tiny hole of the needle itself, the first, second and third attempt you failed but the fourth attempt did you succeed.

Then you saw something at out the corner of your eyes, you put your needlework down and peered into the horizon again. You squinted your eyes and you could've swore you saw something moving in the mist. You looked around for a few seconds and you saw that nobody saw what you saw, what didn't strange was. You looked again and then you saw the outline of a ship, right sailing to you. You shouted to signal that what you saw and everyone stopped what they were doing and took their weapons. They peered into the horizon and a few seconds later they saw it too, ''the damned Navy found us!'' ''Load the cannons!'' ''Stop firing until there is nothin' left of it!'' those three things you could hear before a cannon was fired. You fastened your medpack and took one of your guns of your belt and grapped it for dear life.

The ship of the Navy became parrallel to Jack's ship and the cannon hit the front deck, splinters flew in all dicrections and you saw a few men were blown away by the force. People from both sides were screaming, you felt a rush of wind behind you and at the cornes of your eyes you saw a rope bouncing back to the Navy. You whipped around and where met with the barrel of his pistol, ''surrender pirate and we would not hurt you.'' ''I'm not a pirate,'' you grunted while you took a few steps backwards. In a matter of seconds he could blow your brain out of your skull and actually you did not want that. If he pointed his pistol on another day, a day where your mental health was on it's shittiest, maybe you would welcome it but now? Now, there was a chance to see your best friend again you didn't want to welcome death. You clicked your gun to your belt and yanked his pistol towards you but he didn't let go. He let out a soft grunt and you slapped with your vibranium hand the gun out of his and kicked it away from him. Now he was defenseless and that was the position that you wanted him to be in. Your face was stoic and you clenched your fist and let it hover at your face to create a defence, he followed your step and let out a laugh to mock you. ''What's so funny hm?'' you grunted at him, ''I just can not believe that I am fighting against a woman, should you not work in the kitchen, instead of trying to fight against us, the Navy?'' The glare you gave him hardened and you spat out: ''Stupid man-thing.'' He didn't react well on your insult and lunched towards your jaw, you crouched down to dodge the hit and gave from underneath an uppercut to his instead. His body flew from the force on the deck and he was flat out cold, you picked up his pistol and tossed it towards your crew. You stepped over his body and kicked his ribs for a good measure. You took your gun again from your waistband and shot a few men down from your left. The cannons from both sides didn't stop with shooting and a ring was forming into your brain. You tightly shutted your eyes for a second and rubbed your hand on your forehead in the hope of silencing the ringing noise.

You looked to your right, onto the waters of the sea and onto the ship of the Navy. You saw a few of your crew on it and you were worried that they would be in minority. You ran towards a rope while you were dodging bullets and red coats to your left and right. With your vibranium arm you grabbed the rope tight and gave it a tug. Firstly you took a few steps backwards and then you ran towards the railing of the Black Pearl. A few Navy man were running at you while some of your crew were running behind them, you shot one in the knee and the other in the shoulder. You sprung on the railing and you lifted yourself up higher in the rope itself. You were flying into the dark blue sky that was freckled with stars. It honestly reminded you of the time that you went into space and the next thing you knew you sprung onto the deck of the Navy. You rolled over to not injure yourself and stood right up. You ran to the group of men who were surroundering the people you were familiar with, from backwards you grapped a full hand of white hair and yanked a body to the back and gave an punch to the temple of another man. An opening was created and there you saw Will, Elizabeth and Jack. The Navy men looked surprised that you were here after not hearing you, especially from a certain man. You stood next to Elizabeth and she said: ''How are you not out of breath?'' ''That's not true, I'm a bit out of breath but not so much.''

The fourth of you made a little circle and were shuffeling around, the medpack on your back never felt so heavy on your back. ''You are surrounded Jack give up!'' the man said who gave you a surprised look a few seconds ago, ''you know that man Elizabeth?'' you murmered to her while you pointed your gun at someone's head while they did the same to you. ''Yes, I know him, a little to well..'' she murmered back, a silence fell between you two while you could hear Jack say with a small grin: ''It's actually Captain Jack Sparrow, commodore.'' '' His name is James Norrington and he was my fiancé,'' ''he was your what?'' You were surprised by that information. ''James is not a bad man you know? He is just not Will.''

At this point you saw more men making their way home to their ship again, bloodied but with will power. ''Guys, you have to leave in a few minutes. More and more men are returning to their ships and it will be not longer safe!'' you shouted above the cannon firing. ''What do you mean, you're not staying here alone Y/N!'' you could hear Will scream at you, ''I will manage it, go! A few meters behind you Jack and Will there are a few ropes, use them and return to the Black Pearl!'' You could hear Will and Elizabeth protesting and even you could hear Jack saying that it would be stupid. ''For Gods sake, you're pirates! Are you not suppose to safe your own life? Go! Just go!'' You shot four men into their legs and pushed Will, Elizabeth and Jack towards their opening. The Navy men sprung into action and tried to capture them while they also tried to kill you. Here and there you knocked a few man out but mostly you maked sure that Will, Elizabeth and Jack were in safety. Elizabeth turned her head and shouted almost incoherently: ''We will rescue you Y/N, don't be worried!''

A barrel of a gun was facing you again and you knew that you were outnumbered. The man who was named James Norrington said: ''Surrender now pirate, you are outnumbered, drop your weapons and put your hands before you.'' You carefully laid your guns, your taser and a few knifes on the ground. The man looked strange at them but said nothing of it, he only kicked them carefully away. ''I'm not a pirate,'' you said to him. ''That's what they all say ma'am. Please put your hands before you.'' You did exactly what he said.

#james norrington #james norrington imagine #james norrington x reader #elizabeth swann #will turner #jack sparrow #potc #pirates of the caribbean #marvel #avengers #the avengers #crossover #fanfic #commodore norrington #commodore norrington x reader #avengers endgame #marvelcrossover

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sitp-recs · 4 years ago

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hello darling, I'd like to thank you for your commit in your blog and your recommendation, that are so precious for the fandom. About that if you don't mind, I'd would like to ask you some raccomandations for ones of my favorite trope: amnesia/lost memory. Thank you again <3 I hope you'l have a great day

Hi friend, thanks so much for the lovely words! I don’t read this trope very often but here are a few recs :) enjoy!

the shape of memory by hogwartsfirebolt (2022, T, 3k)

Harry's brush with death has left consequences. Thankfully, Draco is there to help him navigate the uncertain waters of his mind.

fermata by @onewhodiedyoung (2019, M, 6.5k)

They hit pots with cutlery to keep the quiet away, but they both knew that it would never tire, that it would always come back like a fox to a hen house.

Blue Vase by ivyblossom (2002, T, 4k)

The war is over; Harry has buried himself in the tedium of a job, Draco has lost himself in stale vengeance. When Harry loses his memory, Draco steps in to tell him an alternate version of their lives.

Memories Of You by tryslora (2012, M, 9k)

When Draco is injured and forgets their life together, Harry is willing to do anything he can to bring those memories back to Draco. He promised him forever, and that’s what he’s determined they’ll have.

Ship of Theseus by GallaPlacidia (2020, T, 18k)

When Harry gets amnesia and forgets he and Draco were ever married, he refuses treatment to remember.

Sleeping Dragon by Omi_Ohmy (2012, E, 20k)

When Draco loses his memory, Harry struggles to recognise the man he loves. As they get to know each other again, can Harry overcome his sense of loss? And will Draco ever remember that he loves Harry?

In Pursuit of Lost Marbles by Theartfulldodger (2021, T, 22k)

Every night after work, Healer Malfoy follows the same routine, beginning with a familiar flight of stairs that leads to the Janus Thickey Ward at St. Mungo's. With an air of professionalism, he introduces himself to Harry, his husband of seven years, when a memory curse makes Harry look at him like a stranger.

Haunt the corner of my eye by @harryromper (2020, T, 23k)

Harry’s life is very much on track. After a successful career as an Auror, he’s set to become the youngest ever Minister for Magic. But strange things are starting to happen at Grimmauld Place.

Welcome to the Broom Closet by incapricious (2007, E, 23k)

Harry thinks he knows how his life will go: Become an Auror. Marry Ginny. Have a family. But then he sees an advertisement in the paper that no one else can see, and his life is turned upside-down.

If Memory Serves by @dictacontrion (2014, E, 30k)

Maybe Draco wants to forget. Maybe it’s wrong to make him remember.

The Four Doors by @fluxweeed (2020, E, 48k)

It’s been four months since Harry lost his memory. Four months of dead ends and no answers. With time running out until his memories are gone for good, Harry agrees to a course of Legilimency therapy with a renowned specialist: Mind Healer Draco Malfoy.

Of Fates Entwined: A Story of Love Lost and Found by taradiane (2014, E, 51k)

Harry Potter vanished without a trace from his home on a warm summer morning in June 2004. This is the story of how a random visit in a cafe on the other side of the world, six years later, proved that the ties which entwine our fates together can never be broken.

Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow by November Snowflake (2012, M, 57k)

When the long-missing Draco Malfoy turns up at a Ministry field hospital with amnesia, bitter Auror Harry Potter must confront the shadows of their shared past to shed light on a potentially deadly mystery.

Nor All That Glisters by @sweet-s0rr0w (2021, E, 116k)

Lonely and frustrated on house arrest, with no prospects for the future, Draco begins brewing Felix Felicis in an attempt to improve his lot. Just in the short term, of course. He isn’t a total idiot.

Close Behind by @oflights (2022, M, 134k)

To rescue Draco from the Underworld, Harry has to look forward. Unfortunately, Draco has to look back.

There Is Always the Moon by @firethesound (2016, T, 160k)

Draco's life after the war is everything he wanted it to be: it's simple, and quiet, and predictable, and safe. But when a mysterious curse shatters the peace he'd worked so hard to build, there's only one person he can trust to help him.

Twist of Fate series by Oakstone730 (2012, T, 315k)

Draco asks Harry to help him beat the Imperius curse during 4th year. The lessons turn into more than either expected. A story of redemption and forgiveness.

#asks #abrunettecoffee #drarry reclist #memory loss

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druigsfavwitch · 5 years ago

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Your savior is here- Loki Odinson x Daughter! Reader (Part 2)

Warning: endgame spoilers!! (Kinda switched it up), angst, character deaths, fluff (yay)

When Carol has brought Tony and Nebula back down to earth, the avengers first question was why wasn’t she there the first time. “Not every world has the avengers.” Then, they had found out that thanos had used the stones again and they got in the ship to go confront him. Loki was still angry. How could thanos just live the rest of his life after throwing his daughter off a cliff. What kind of father was he? Loki still wasn’t over it.

When they arrived, Carol had ambused him while he was out and put him in a headlock. Then the avengers came in and asked him where the stones were and he explained that he used them to get rid of them. But before he could say anything else, Thor sliced his head off. “What? I went for the head.” Everyone was discouraged. How were they supposed to bring everyone back if the stones where gone?

———————5 years———————

The rat had set Scott free and he came to the compound. He talked about how he didn’t get dusted because he was in the quantum realm and how fast time went. Then, he started talking about time travel. They all agreed to try and even tony found a way to do it.

Bruce and Rocket were tasked with getting Thor and Loki. They arrived and talked to Valkyrie, who directed them where to go and instructed them that Thor had taken up alcohol and Loki was still the same, just way more meaner.

They arrived and saw Korg playing fortnite. Thor came out and opened a beer with stormbreaker then they told him how they could bring everyone back with time travel. Thor said he’d go and talk to loki.

He knocked on the door and opened it. He saw that Loki was laying in the bed, reading a book. “Go away.” He said. Thor walked over. “Brother, Bruce and the Rabbit are here. They say tony found a way to bring everyone back.” Loki sighed and continued reading. “Go away, Thor.” Thor sighed. “Brother, we could even bring y/n back.” That tipped him over the edge he closed the book and threw it at the wall. “She died. Before the snap! We can’t. She’s gone!” He said with tears streaming down his face. Thor walked over and hugged him. “Even if there is a chance, we have to take it. Everyone needs to come back.” Loki shook his head and agreed.

When they got to the compound they had set out who was going where: Clint and Natasha were going to vormir; Bruce was going to get the time stone from New York 2012; Tony and Scott were also going to New York to try to get the space stone; Nebula and Rhodey we’re going to morag to get the power stone; after the failed tesseract attempt, Steve and tony went to New Jersey 1970 to get the tesseract; Steve fought 2012 Steve to get the mind stone; and rocket, Thor and Loki whet to get the aether from Asgard in 2013

While in Asgard, Loki saw you walk by with your grandmother. He stared at you until Thor pushed him behind a column. “We’re supposed to stay hidden.” Just then, they heard a voice, and turned around to see frigga. “Thor? And Loki?” She gave them one good once over and said “your not the Thor and Loki I know.” Just then, you popped up from behind her. “Definitely not, he’s supposed to be in prison.” She smiled at you. Loki stared at you and frigga followed his gaze. “The future hasn’t been kind to you boys, has it?” Loki teared up and wiped his eyes. She looked at you and you smiled. You walked over and hugged Loki. He masked a sob and held you. Thor looked at frigga. Just then rocket came running out with the aether. “Let’s go!” Thor reached his hand out and called for mjolnir and it came. Loki let go of of and gave you a smile.

When everyone regrouped, they saw they were missing someone. “Nat, where’s Clint?” She shook her head. Everyone seemed to understand. They then made the gauntlet, without the knowledge that nebula was the 2014 one, and Bruce snapped. A few seconds later, clints phone rang. Natasha looked at the caller idea and saw it was Laura.

Just seconds later, the compound got blown up. Scott has to save rhodey and rocket. Thor, Loki, Tony and Steve were staring at thanos. “Is this a trap.” Thor just stared at him. “Possibly.” Loki said. They started fighting and Steve lifted mjolnir. Then Steve’s com came on and sams voice filled it. “On your left.” Then portals appeared, with everyone who got dusted. Loki knew he shouldn’t have looked but he did.

After the battle that ended with Steve snapping thanos and his minions away, costing him is life, they had a funeral for him.

Natasha was with tony to return the stones to their respectful times.

Seconds went by when they returned. Natasha gave tony a look and he called for Loki. “Reindeer games!” Loki looked over at him and tony called him over. He walked over. Natasha gave him and small smile and moved over, revealing you, standing behind her. Loki’s eyes went wide and filled with tears.

“We went to a different timeline and though you could use some love.” Loki pulled you into a hug and started sobbing. He turned around and looked over at tony and Natasha. “Thank you, both of you.” Tony gave him a smile. “From one parent to another, you’re very welcome.” Tony gave nat a look and they walked away leaving you and him alone.

“Hi father. They told me you helped them save the world.” You gave him a hug. “You’re my hero.” You guys sat there for minutes, just holding each other. “I saved the world for you. I wanted to show you how much you meant to me.” You pulled away and looked at him. “You did a great job.” He looked at you and kissed your head. “I know, my love. We all did.” He saw nat and tony staring at him and gave them a smile. He then saw Morgan run to tony and him pick her up. He would forever be eternally grateful.

@woohoney

A/n: it’s done!!! what do you guys think :)

#loki x reader #loki imagine #avengers x reader #avengers x platonic reader #marvel x reader

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doomedandstoned · 4 years ago

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Italian Doomers BRETUS Tell Ghostly Tales on New LP, ‘Magharia’

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

By Billy Goate

Artwork by DamianaMerante

Hailing from the City of the Two Seas, Italian doomers BRETUS return with a new album of ghost stories. Longtimers know that Bretus and Doomed & Stoned practically grew up together. Though the band has been active since the turn of the century, our first exposure came with their debut full-length 'In Onirica' (2012) and subsequently we formed a friendship with the Catanzaro doomers that continues to this very day. It's hard to believe they're already over two decades old (okay, 20 years young, if you like). And what do they have to show for it? A handful of LPs, an EP, and a split with fellow Italianos Black Capricorn.

If you're as much a fan of vintage horror movies, H.P. Lovecraft lore, mysticism, and the occult as Zagarus (vox), Ghenes (guitar), Janos (bass), and Striges (drums), there's a whole world of story and sound awaiting your deep dive into the Bretus catalog. Adding to their already excellent discography, a fifth album now reveals itself: 'Magharia' (2021).

I won't spoil my interview with the band (see below) if I tell you that the album concerns, shall we say, several tales of the supernatural variety. An ominous gong is struck to the backdrop of monastic chant as Magharia opens in epic fashion "Celebration of Gloom," a song characterized by a chugging proto-trash tempo, trve metal stylings, and Gothic vocals appropriate to it's subject. It's a rather grim account of a certain sacrilegious priest and his daliences with young women of the church. As a preacher's kid, I've seen this kind of thing play out a hundred times and can assure you these sweeping romances between clergy and laity never end well. In this case, it winds up with a ghoulish rite and a victim's vengeance.

"In the sky lightning strikes...wicked laments rise from the ground." Welcome to "Cursed Island." True to the spirit of the lyrics, this track really let's it all hang out, with quasi operatic vocals that occasionally erupt in maniacal laughter (reminding me vintage Reagers-era Saint Vitus, with its lusty swagger). And why not? This is after all about the mystery that surrounds one of the most haunted islands on earth.

Thus far, the record's been sporting a pretty up-beat pulse, so surely you're ready for some good old fashion doom? "Moonchild's Scream" concerns a albino girl accused of being possessed by the devil for her appearance. One day, she disappears in the dungeons of a castle and legend has it that her cries can still be heard every five years during the Summer Solstice. Doesn't get more doom than that, folks!

After a brief interlude ("Necropass"), we arrive at my favorite track of Magharia. "Nuraghe" concerns the spirit of a woman judged and condemned for a crime she was innocent of still roams among the ancient stones. Boy, the ancients sure did have a hang-up with free-spirited, independent women, didn't they? The song itself is possessed by the spirit of Pentagram in its biting guitar work and rhythmic attack. Love the riffage on this one! Some of it could have been played out just a little more for my taste, like the all-too-brief Soundgardenesque motif at the two-minute mark. It returns a minute later, again in brief. C'mon Ghenes, let your inner Kim Thayil loose! Maybe we can convince them to improv at this point with a bitchin' guitar solo at their next festival appearance. Then again, perhaps this fits artistically with the song, which speaks of obscure "grim dancing bats" and a ghost that haunts through swift shadows passing over glimmers of light. Once again, Zagrus expressive song style comes through to distinguish this as a gem of the genre. I shall be revisiting it on my personal playlist often.

"Headless Ghost" strikes graceful Goatsnake groove as the yarn is spun about the restless and tormented soul of an ancient Roman warrior who has risen from his place of rest. All he wants is the skull that was looted from his place of burial. Give it back to him! "No one will be spared tonight," the lyrics warn, as the song shifts down to a dire doom dirge as the night unveils a strange moon and the wanderings of a cursed soul, seeking his head and not more. "He is living again in this hell."

"The Bridge of Damnation" is one of the creepiest of the record, said to be about "a bridge, a young boy, and his three torturers." The mood is quite dark, with esoteric atmosphere, reverberating vocalizations, guitar and bass trading off notes. Oh, and did I mention this tale from the crypt involves death and resurrection, as well? The riffmaking and drumming are absolutely on point, as is the singing -- which by now in the record I'm not only am accustomed to, but have grown to admire. Another keeper!

"Sinful Nun" winds and grinds as Zagarus croons about the inner torment of a Sister who has never gotten over her beloved, who died under such unspeakably tragic circumstances that she decided to consecrate herself to God in celibacy. However, her vows are in vain as she still pines for her long lost lover. The verses are sung to the accompaniment of a galloping tempo, which seems to represent the fevered anguish of a soul forever stricken by grief and the haunted memories of lost love. This is juxtaposed in the chorus by a cursed riff that seems to speak as the Hand of Fate itself. "Farewell to this life," are the Sinful Nun's final words.

At last, we reach the album's namesake and though "Magharia" is entirely instrumental, it would be a mistake to assume you know what it's going to do. Around the four-minute mark, I had to check and make sure I was listening to the same album, as dark synth busted out a metronomic rhythm, leading to a declamatory section of keyboards to accompany the math-like guitar play and an improvisation of almost creepy seventies-sounding prog, which after its playful fit dissipates suddenly in a bluesy collapse.

Bretus have cooked up a remarkable horror soundtrack that, though it speaks of ancient lore, is very much a fitting backdrop to the unreality of our own times. Fitting somewhere on the stylistic spectrum between Candlemass and Paul Chain, Reverend Bizarre and Cardinals Folly, Margharia may be the band's finest effort to date. Certainly, it rewards repeated listens, and will haunt you for many years to come. Look for the record to drop this weekend (pre-order here), with multiple physical formats releasing via The Swamp Records (compact disc), Burning Coffin Records (cassette), and Overdrive Records (vinyl). Until then, you can stream it all, right now, right here!

Give ear...

Magharia by BRETUS

An Interview with Bretus

What is the concept behind the new album and what themes do you explore?

Musically the new record is most "in your face" than the previous album. Also our approach to the recording was different. We rehearsed and arranged together more than before. The result is an album more raw to us. It is a concept album born around different italian old ghost tales. Some of these is supposed to be legend or myth, who knows.

When did you write it? Was it during the pandemic lockdowns?

We had more ideas about new stuff long before the pandemia arrived. We spent this time working on the pre-production of the tracks.

Can you give us a track-by-track explanation of each song on the album?

For sure!

"Celebration of Gloom" is a strange song because there are many influences in it. Including a solo flute in the middle of the track. However is a very loud and gloomy song.

"Cursed Island" probably is the most rock 'n' roll song of the album. If you know what I mean. Rock in the attitude. Also the first video of the album.

"Moonchild's Scream" is 100% pure Doom with a heavy mid-section.

"Necropass" is like Caronte travelling the damned souls across the Stige River.

"Nuraghe" is a heavy oriented track with a very dark feeling.

"Headless Ghost" has a more stoner trend than the others and in the end there is a psycho riffing.

"The Bridge of Damnation" includes our '80s dark influences into our sound, probably the most haunted track of the album. The story is based upon an old weird story that happened in our native city, Catanzaro.

"Sinful Nun" is like an experiment and neither of us can explain really what it is... ah ah aha! For sure the most heavy track of all.

Finally "Magharia." You cannot believe it but the idea comes from a Who's album, Quadrophenia. Either of us wrote a part of the song. The result is a kind of horror soundtrack.

Magharia by BRETUS

How do you feel that your basic style or approach to song composition has changed since you first started writing songs in the early days?

You already know a lot of things about us, we know you from so long ago! Please don't ask how old we are. (laughs) Basically our approach is the same from the beginning. Of course we listen to a lot of new stuff during these years so every album brings different "colors."

Where are you most looking forward to playing live once pandemic restrictions are eased?

Everywhere! We are angry for live gigs or simply to drink beers with friends.

Follow The Band

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#D&S Debuts #D&S Interviews #D&S Reviews #Bretus #Catanzaro #Italy #doom #metal #doom metal #horror #occult #stoner rock #HeavyBest2021 #Doomed and Stoned

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coleisunderrated · 4 years ago

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An Important Announcement

It’s been a long time since I’ve made a post and I hope you’re all doing well in these difficult times. I’ve been doing some thinking lately and there were times I feel I’ve been forcing myself to stay in this fandom. I may have had this account for less than a year but I’ve been watching and following Ninjago since 2012. I enjoyed the show and seeing it evolve but now, I feel like it lost its charm. Face it, even in the beginning the show had a ton of issues but with the new direction the show has taken, I feel that the cons have now outweighed the pros and it’s no longer worth watching. I’m still working on my stories on Ao3 and I’ll still make Tales of Ninjago content on my sideblog but other than that, I think it’s time for me to leave the fandom and find others to take part in. You all have been so friendly and welcoming and I will cherish the time I’ve been with you guys. I might not be gone forever and I may come back here one day but only time will tell. For now, it’s been a great time while it lasted and I will cherish the time with you. Thank you and goodbye.

#ninjago #underrated rambles #it's been a good run

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forgadgetsandgizmos · 5 years ago

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What Comes Next

My final piece for Alex Manes Week 2020, written for day 6 | Prompt: The Lost Decade. Also, italics may not show up on mobile. They aren’t for me, not sure why. If that happens, you may want to read on AO3.

Read it on AO3

May, 2009

Alex Manes had lost his virginity to a man.

The to a man part of that statement was important to him. The most important part, if he’s being honest, because six months after basic and it still surprised him. Growing up under Jesse, in Roswell of all places, he had expected to have to bite the bullet with a girl he (hopefully) didn’t hate, therefore crushing of the last thing of he had to fantasize about that his dad couldn’t poison. That, or stay a virgin forever.

Neither were very appealing options.

And it turned out that the poison of his father was far more infectious and lethal than he had imagined.

So yeah, the fact that he had managed to lose his virginity to a man without the world ending was what allowed him to find a bar two days before his first deployment, buy a man a beer, and follow him to his apartment where said man currently laid sprawled out under him, one hand on his chest and another gripping tightly to the headboard.

“Fuck, Alex.” His back arched up as Alex added another lubed finger in his ass, spreading them and stretching him open.

The man – Bryce? No, Boyd, – had started to top, but Alex hadn’t let him get as far as ripping open the condom before flipping him on his back and taking it himself. There was only one person Alex had bottomed for and he wasn’t interested in repeating the experienced for a drunk nobody from a bar he drove an hour to get to. Based off the loud moans coming from the man underneath him, it hadn’t been a problem.

“Just, just fuck me, please,” Boyd begged, spreading his legs further.

Alex pulled his fingers out and pressed his mouth to a nipple instead, flicking it with his tongue. This was his only chance to get laid until after an 8-month deployment.

They were just getting started.

* * *

December, 2010

The beers had yet to stop coming, the cheering and base of the music growing louder with each glass bottom he reached. Alex had raced past drunk 2 hours ago, eager to chase away pangs of regret over the beautiful man at the club’s bar who had caught his eye as soon as he walked in. Half his unit was here, still wearing their t-shirts identifying them as Air Force. Beautiful men weren’t in the cards tonight.

Based off the number of hands clasping his shoulder and inching him towards a group of obviously tipsy, well-dressed women, everyone else hadn’t gotten the memo.

“Come on, Alex, you need to lighten up,” Montgomery yelled over the music from behind him. “I know just the thing.”

And then warmth filled him as soft lips met his and a chest pressed against his own. He wrapped his hands around the hips and was faintly aware of his name being hollered.

The next thing he knew, wind was hitting his face and fingers were fumbling for his belt buckle. Another hand pulled his hair hard and Alex leaned into the touch, eyes closed. The hand on his belt, job completed, pulled up his shirt and pressed a cool touch. Lips hit his own again, a pair of breasts the only thing touching when they did.

Breasts?

Alex flung his open and took in everything he had missed before. He was in an alley, presumably behind the bar. The tug on his hair almost numbed it, but he could feel nails digging into where fingers curled against his skull. Long hair tickled his back where it slipped under his shirt. This was one of the women from the group inside, the one in the tight dress and heels she now teetered on.

Alex pulled back and gently pushed her off.

The dazed woman looked back at him.

“You’re drunk. Go back inside,” he finally said, still flustered. The alley around him seemed to spin.

He ignored the annoyed curses in favor of kneeling over and giving into the churning feeling making its way up his throat. He doesn’t know how long he laid there with a hand pressed against the stained bar wall before the city sounds where joined by faint music from inside.

Rough hands gently lifted him up, tilted his head back, placed something hard against his lips.

“Come on, Alex. Can you drink this for me?”

Cool water rushed down his throat. He grabbed the bottle, chugging the rest in an effort to wash away the taste of beer and cherry Chapstick. It ran down the sides of his chin onto his shirt. He dropped the empty bottle and pressed both hands against the cool concrete, intending to push himself up against the wall.

“Careful,” the voice warned.

Not fast enough. The word had barely registered before what colors he could see in the dark haze swirled together and the building pressure in his head finally popped.

Here, open up.

Light burned his eyes. He squeezed them tighter. The light was gone. It helped, a bit. Something small and round was pressed into his mouth, followed by a straw he slowly sipped from. It tasted strangely metallic.

Voices he couldn’t distinguish echoed.

A blanket was laid over him. He pulled it over his head and the hushed voices faded completely.

The pounding in his head woke him. At least it was dark this time. He curled in on himself and willed it away.

Alex opened his eyes to morning light just barely peeking out from behind his blackout curtains. He was in his bed, tucked under a pile of blankets. A note folded in half was placed on the nightstand.

>>Take these, dumbass

Advil lay beside a glass of water. A trash can was underneath.

Alex moved to sit up and a body in the bed shifted next to him. Jaimie and Nibble’s sleeping forms snored lightly beside him. Across the room, Montgomery slept in a chair, curled up with a blanket Alex recognized from his living room.

They had stayed. Alex did as he was told and laid back down, a ghost of a smile on his face.

* * *

January, 2012

Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell was repealed officially back in September of 2011. He got the news from a friend of a friend while he was deployed in West Africa.

Alex didn’t sleep that night, and it wasn’t because of the heat.

* * *

June, 2013

The couple across from him was laughing. Clay’s old service buddy had told a bland military joke that had sent Clay and the other couple, old friends he’d met before, into a fit of laughter. Clay apparently saw his confused expression over the reaction it had caused and explained: it had been an inside joke from before their unit had split up and the buddy (whose name was currently unknown due to Alex forgetting to listen when the man introduced himself) had retired with an honorable discharge.

To his annoyance, group of 7 isn’t enough to hide in and the wine in front of him couldn’t make up for that or the bland chicken casserole in front of him. Alex consoled himself by remembering that in hour, maybe less, he could excuse himself from the family-and-friends dinner from hell without offending anyone or getting an angry phone call from Dad later about how he had, yet again, disappointed and embarrassed him.

“Don’t like that kind of humor,” a gentle voiced asked. Miranda, Clay’s wife, sat to his right. Clay had taken the seat at the head of the table, leaving Miranda sitting between them.

“You hear it a lot,” he answered. And you did, especially as the youngest of four in a military family where everyone joined a different branch.

“I’ve been a military wife for a decade,” she said with a laugh. “Trust me, I know. But that’s not what I asked.”

Alex tipped his head. “Very astute. And to answer your question, it’s not exactly my niche.”

She hummed. “No date, tonight?”

“I’ve been pretty busy with my station at base. Haven’t had a lot of time for meeting people.”

“Well, we missed you at Christmas.”

It was Alex’s turn to humm. He appreciated the sentiment, but considering he’d had one of the best Christmas’ in years celebrating at Patrick’s place with eggnog, rum balls, and a family that, despite not being his own, had welcomed him with his own stocking hung among the others? He somehow doubted that.

“Okay,” Miranda rolled her eyes good-naturedly. “I missed you at Christmas. You left me alone with a bunch of vulgar boys!”

“I don’t count as a vulgar boy?”

Miranda shot him a sly smile and leaned in until she could speak directly into his ear. “I think we both know you’re the exception to the Manes family, in the best ways possible.” She met his eyes and glanced pointedly down to her stomach and glass of water. “I hope they take after you.”

The wife of Clay’s buddy, who’d brought the bad tasting casserole, caught Miranda’s attention to ask about a fundraiser she was planning.

I hope he takes after you.

Huh. Clay, a father. He felt a twang of regret over the state of his strained relationship with Clay at the idea of missing out on knowing his little niece or nephew.

“It’s for a good cause,” the woman was insisting. “Fundraising is important in times like these. It’ll do good to see a handsome Airman like you supporting them.”

Alex regretting tuning the woman out earlier. Aside from her asking him to involved in a fundraiser, he had tuned out what exactly he was being asked to do, and for what. It must be something military, he supposes. He hadn’t heard them talk about other causes.

“It’ll be good to see you again, Alex.” Miranda nudged his shoulder. “I miss having a brother-in-law around. And you’ll still be placed at Griffiss in December, so it’ll only be a short train ride down.”

“You’re welcome to stay here,” Clay added, almost an afterthought.

Alex took another bite of his chicken casserole, thought about a baby growing up in Clay’s household, with his father and Flint for regular visitors, and agreed.

An hour later, Alex excused himself with fumbled explanations and Clay clasped him on the shoulder. “I appreciate you helping out, baby bro." He leaned in closer to whisper “I know this isn’t your usual style.”

“The department really appreciates your donation,” Clay’s buddy (whose name Alex still hadn’t found out) exclaimed with an obvious wink.

The department?

Oh. Not his style.

This was a Christmas police fundraiser. Fan-fucking-tastic.

He would never admit to it, but for the first time in his life, he sent up a (unanswered) prayer to get deployed.

* * *

December, 2013

“Wear your dress blues,” they said.

“Make sure you’ve got a nice change of clothes,” they said.

“You’ll have to plan on staying for a day or two after the fundraiser,” they said.

At no point did they bother to say by the way, you’re going to be on a stage being auctioned off to woman and wives of the force for a date.

Alex got to find that out from the announcer on said stage.

It wasn’t nightmare-worthy embarrassing, but only because an older woman in her sixties named Barbara had bought him for $600 in auction. She said she had a grandchild who’d appreciate “a man like himself.” What that meant, Alex didn’t know.

He got to see Miranda, 7 months pregnant, waddling around in her dress. She beamed at him and pressed his hand to her stomach. She didn’t tell anyone that his eyes teared up when he felt the tiny kicks.

Barbara insisted Alex accompany her and her grandson, Will, to mini golf. It was innocent enough until the end, when Alex climbed into Will’s car alone after She ditched them for a friend who she ‘coincidentally’ ran into right as the three finished their game.

It seems that ‘a man like himself’ turned out to mean gay.

Will took Alex back to his apartment where Barbara had insisted Alex drove meet them and then leave Clay’s borrowed car.

He had barely shut the door behind him when Will had him pressed against the wall, inches from his face.

“Is this okay,” he whispered.

Alex leaned forward and kissed him.

They didn’t waste any time before making their way over to the bed in Will’s small room. Sitting against the bed while Will stood between his legs, Alex ripped off Will’s shirt and unfastened his belt while Will undid his own.

Alex grabbed Will’s hand seconds before he could pull down his briefs. “I’m a top,” he stated. “Is that okay for you?”

“Lube and condoms are in the top drawer,” Will grinned.

Alex didn’t tease him. After Will was prepped, he turned him around and lined up his cock with Will’s ass. He traced a finger lightly down his spine, feeling Will’s body tremble at the soft touch, and pushed in.

Unlike Alex, Will wasn’t quiet. He came with a shout onto the bed just before Alex, and both men laid on the bed panting.

They exchanged numbers before Alex left.

* * *

February, 2015

The news came that Miranda had filed for divorce.

In October, a judge grants her majority custody of Eugene ‘Tripp’ Manes IV. Clay would have visitation every other weekend.

Alex visited for Tripp’s one-year birthday. It was adorable; Miranda got him this miniature cake that he shoved in his mouth face first.

Clay is there. Miranda says they parted amicably enough, and she wants Tripp to have a father, even if she can’t have a husband.

It’s the best trip there he’s ever had.

Alex visited Will before he left and ended up staying an extra day. They don’t do much talking but agree to meet up when Alex comes down to babysit Tripp for a weekend that Miranda and Clay will both be out of town.

They do. It’s nice.

* * *

April, 2017

Alex got the notice that he’s being deployed via email at midnight two weeks before he’s due to report.

He almost didn’t, but he called Will. They spend the two weeks in bed.

* * *

September, 2017

He’s a codebreaker. He doesn’t go out in the field. It’s what he told Will when he left (It’s as safe as it can be, don’t worry. I’ll call if I can, okay?) He actually does, too.

“Don’t be typing too much, now,” he always says at the end of every call. “Don’t want those fingers cramping up.” He sounds suggestive when he says it and it reminds Alex what they are: fuck buddies that ended up friends-with-benefits. In that sense, he likes it.

On the other hand, him saying ‘other activities’ always makes him picture freezing up when he needs to pull the trigger, and the other guy pulling it first.

He has nightmares about that.

The combatants they’re up against got a new hacker. They must have, because someone had the sense to limit system access to a specific location ping tied to the server that he needs to access.

“What does that mean?” Patrick sounds nervous at Alex’s tone and it’s not fucking helping.

“It means that even if I spoof my location and claim I’m within the vicinity of the system, the server sweeps for a signal to be bounced back within the set perimeters. Since I won’t be there, the signal can’t get bounced back and the system triggers an alarm that shuts it down.”

The team stared at him, silent.

“And?” Patrick again, apprehensive this time.

Alex sighed. “It means I have to go there.”

No one is happy about it, but they have a plan.

Another unit fakes a mission gone wrong on the opposite side of base to draw attention. Montgomery takes out the guards left on side Alex needs access to with a sniper. Jaimie and Nibble drive Alex to the perimeter edge so he can step inside. Ten minutes, and his program gets everything they need. He, Nibble, and Montgomery on sniper can watch Jaimie’s back while he drives away.

Alex got all the way inside the perimeter before things go sideways. With three minutes on the clock, they’re spotted. And for three minutes, everything is fine. He’s dressed like them, they all are, so no one attacks him in his hiding spot in a personal tent. He made it within feet of the jeep when the world explodes. He woke up to screams and a piercing ringing filling his head. Smoke clouds his view of anything past him, but he doesn’t need to see to feel the heavy metal of the jeep railing crushing his leg.

The ringing doesn’t stop, he can’t hear, and if he can’t hear, he doesn’t know if it’s safe to call for help or move or do anything. Bullets flying light up the red-tinged smoke. The red doesn’t make sense at first, but he tried to lift his head, to understand, and the dripping on the ground is clear. His eye has blood over it, from a head wound it seems, and the stinging is so bad that despite his best efforts, they shut.

Private.

Can you open your eyes for me, private?.

He’s hallucinating. Why else would those curls be brushing against his head?

Captain Manes!

* * *

October, 2017

Alex let the darkness take him in Iraq and woke up in Germany.

He’s been in a medically induced coma for two weeks. There are three things that he knows.

Jaimie and Nibble are dead. Patrick’s eyes are rimmed red when he tells him.

He missed the funeral.

And it turned out that he’s missing a lot more than a funeral. It’s not there but he feels it, feels it fucking burning and it won’t stop and he’s screaming and screaming and screaming.

Patrick offered to call Will. Alex remembers trying to shake his head and shooting pain. Whatever happened, Will never called.

When Alex opened his eyes after that first time, Jesse was there. He couldn’t deal with – but he hadn’t seen him yet.

Alex closed his eyes again.

* * *

January, 2018

Physical therapy makes him want to pull out his hair, but he still doesn’t think it as bad as actual therapy.

His PTSD triggers aren’t so black and white as a lost limb, and he isn’t about to unload the drama of his abusive Air Force father onto an Air Force-mandated therapist. It’s a waste of time for the entire eight weeks mandated.

* * *

April, 2018

The news was early, which was unusual. The Air Force is anything but fast acting, and he submitted his request four days ago. Allowing for a week, the earliest he should be getting this letter is Friday.

It was Wednesday.

Alex ripped it open and read the words. And read them again. And again.

But no matter how many times he reads them, the words haven’t changed. Aren’t going to.

Per request, you are assigned to Roswell, New Mexico for the duration of your commitment.

He’s going home.

See it on AO3

#roswell new mexico #alexappreciation2020 #alexweek2020 #Malex #alex manes #roswellnm #roswell nm #rnm #michael guerin #the lost decade

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daesungfmd · 4 years ago

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playlist 1.

seven songs describing different stages of daesung’s life so far.

lights, up we go / 2008 ― 2012.

here, in a familiar place. we got our heads down and we pretend it’s ‘cause the night is dark and running out of space for us to run around, but it’s a dead end and money’s tight. it’s been a long time of this ― something has got to give. everyone here is ready to go, it’s been a hard year with nothing to show. from down this road, it’s only on we go. everyone here is ready to go, it’s been a hard year and i only know from down this low, it’s only up we go.

2008 is the earliest year of daesung’s life that he vividly remembers. before 2008, his life definitely had downsides, but he didn’t have much that he could rightfully complain about; at the end of even the hardest day, things were still… good. but 2008 brought more hardships than daesung was equipped to handle & saw his relationship with his mother deteriorating. they were both struggling, but instead of coming together to support each other, they frequently lashed out and simply made things worse. in the three years that followed, daesung became better at supporting his mother, but he rarely felt supported in return ― internally bitter with the idea that he was having to act as a parent, but in reality, she was so caught up in keeping their family afloat that she often fell short on the emotional side. they were also beginning to struggle financially (which only got worse and worse over the months, with his mom falling far enough behind that it didn’t seem like she’d ever catch up), which added a feeling of helplessness to the loneliness that daesung was (poorly) dealing with. generally a bad time all around, but they both continued to pretend that they weren’t struggling so no one around them would pity them, even though they definitely could’ve used some assistance. this was around the time that daesung became extremely ambitious (surprisingly). set high goals in his personal life, his school life & for his future career because……. life can not suck like this forever!!! it’s gotta be up from here, right?

john the ghost, red house / 2008 — present.

if you’re not everything, you’re nothing ‘til you try to be. nobody needs saving, just a little bit of empathy. you can’t save the ones you love, but who would really want to? who would really want to?

i touched on daesung’s relationship with his mom in the explanation for the previous track, but it goes a lot deeper than a few sentences could ever explain. before 2008, she was outwardly happy and very, very loving — after 2008, she hardly seemed like the same woman. she and daesung endured the same pain, but neither of them coped healthily. neither got counseling, either, so they often took their sadness and pain out on each other in the form of harsh words and accusations. more often than not, they were fighting. the only time they got along was when they were in daesung’s mom’s salon, and even then, they still argued quite a lot, just with softer voices. after the first year, they started to build back the relationship they’d had prior to 2008, but it was a slow process and often involved daesung taking blame for things that (usually) weren’t his fault & having to calm his mom down when she got too angry or sad. things never did fully go back to how they once were and even now, twelve years later, daesung’s still bitter over how things turned out. how he so often had to take on responsibility that he was too young to deserve and how she failed to emotionally support him like he supported her. he realizes that having to provide financial support took almost all of her energy, but still — it doesn’t change the fact that he felt like he was lacking parental love at that time and even feels like he’s still lacking it now. if you get them alone, a fight is almost always sure to occur, even if it’s a passive one that only ends with secretly hurt feelings rather than outwardly hurt ones. they both acknowledge the other’s suffering, but they’re both too clumsy and ashamed to apologize for the past twelve years or even give reminders that they love each other. most of their meetings are confined to her salon; a semi-public place where they can be semi-vulnerable without necessarily viewing it as a bad thing. they spend a lot of time together there, but rarely have conversations of substance and, as a result, they’ve both begun to feel a lot like strangers rather than family.

jimmy eat world, 555 / 2012 — 2014.

i keep my focus on the simple things, trying to find some peace along the way. i wish i knew how long i’m supposed to wait. holding on, but just barely. got the feeling i’ve been talking to a dead, dead line. there’s always a reason to let it change. is there anyone there listening while you cry, cry, cry? there’s always a reason for the pain. i’m doing the things that i’m told every day, every day, every day. then why does it feel like i’m moving in place?

training, in daesung’s opinion, simply sucked. he went into training completely blind, considering he didn’t even fully realize what he was auditioning for — just that it may or may not lead to him being a musician. the competitiveness was what hit him the hardest. he’s not a particularly competitive person, so he was more interested in making friends and having a good time (😔), but he didn’t encounter a whole lot of people who were as nonchalant as he was. he struggled to adjust to the trainee life and harsh criticism from trainers/supervisors hit him hard, being some of the first real criticism he’d ever received. he spent his two years as a trainee feeling really lonely, but he didn’t have anyone outside of the company that he could reasonably turn to — his lack of time meant that most of his friendships had vanished and he cut off all contact with his mom during this time, as well, so he couldn’t turn to her. he tried very hard to stay focused and optimistic, but his strength was wavering. especially because he frequently got scolded for doing things that he didn’t even realize he wasn’t supposed to do. felt like he was getting pushed around by life & the people around him, even though half of that was undoubtedly just self-pity amplified by his loneliness.

blackbear, i feel bad / 2014 — 2016.

you’re so good at making me feel bad, at making me feel terrible about myself, good. you’re so good at making others hurt with only just your words, with only just your words and i feel bad. i don’t feel good.

daesung has a heart made of glass & his tendency to take things personal was a whole lot stronger when he was seventeen. sure, he was supposed to be the ~funny guy~, but constantly being the subject of jokes took a huge toll on his mental health in the beginning. he felt like no one acknowledged the fact that he’s an actual human being with actual feelings and, consequentially, felt like he wasn’t good for much aside from evoking laughter, even at his own expense. it didn’t help that inpulses hadn’t gotten the chance to know him on a more substantial level yet, so they, too, chose to make him into a joke. most comments or interactions at fansigns were ~playful teasing~ but enough ~playful teasing~ loses its humor, as he learned firsthand. eventually, he mastered the art of either initiating the jokes about himself so that they didn’t catch him off guard or swiftly changing the subject to something equally funny but not confidence-crushing. by 2016, he’d matured enough that he realized that’s just variety, baby! sometimes you gotta suck it up and get made fun of a little. learned to laugh at himself & fire back — nowadays, it’s virtually impossible to hurt his feelings with a joke and fans know him well enough to know that he’s more than just a jester.

glass animals, dreamland / 2015 — present.

you’ve had too much of the digital love, you want everything live, you want things you can touch. make it feel like a movie you saw in your youth, make it feel like that song that just unopened you.

less than a year after debuting, daesung had already become bored of idol life. of course, it’s not like the industry itself is boring — it’s an eventful life with seemingly never-ending work hours, but all in all, it lacks the enthusiasm, color and realism that daesung has always, always craved. as a child and teenager, he already knew how big the world was beyond his own day to day life. half the reason he wanted to be a rockstar wasn’t because of his passion for rock music itself, but because of how rock ‘n’ roll is portrayed in the media. you can think whatever you want, but to daesung, their lively and borderline reckless lives appealed to him like nothing else ever had. to live like that — throwing caution to the wind, living for yourself and having fun was something he couldn’t fathom, but he wanted to experience it so bad. skip a few years in the future and he is a musician, but not the kind he wants to be. and nowhere near as free as he’d dreamt of being. his first complaint was backtracks on music shows; thoughts of how rock musicians would be called posers if they dared to perform without… well, actually performing. his second complaint was how strict the rules were. he learned to accept that there are extreme differences between idols and “real musicians” (as daesung himself would put it), but he still isn’t happy about it. you could say that he feels like his life is lacking something and possibly always will be lacking that something, but he tries to live as freely as he can while still avoiding ~controversies~.

grayscale, diamond / 2016 ― 2018.

i know it took some time, but i got my footing right. feeling, i’m feeling so good tonight. can’t stop me from dancing, can’t keep me from blooming. welcome to my, welcome to my — this world is my diamond.

as a public figure, it took some time before daesung was able to earn widespread approval. it’s not like he’s ever done anything controversial, it’s just that the rumors of him bring arrogant from next: origin story stuck around for a hot minute & his loud, impossible to ignore persona after debuting rubbed some folks the wrong way. by 2016, he’d managed to escape the negative opinions almost entirely and was able to ignore any lingering hate comments with ease. although he’s always had a happy and energetic demeanor publicly, any long-term fans could confirm in a heartbeat that he was the happiest from 2016 to 2018. during these two years, daesung felt like he was conquering the world — in retrospect, maybe this is really just the time when fame had him feeling the most invincible. but by 2019, there were other things factoring into his overall outlook, including his strong desire to break into acting versus gold star’s refusal to let him do so. he’s still pretty happy and grateful for where he’s at in life, but the elevated sense of self was left in 2018.

waterparks, lowkey as hell / 2016 ― present.

if you need me now, i’ll be there somehow. i’ll pick you up, we can ride. i’ll fly away like i bought my own airline, i’ll take you with me, we can ride. i’m highkey and lowkey as hell your diva, just wanna see ya. i’m highkey and lowkey as hell your sweetheart, don’t wanna be apart.

as a result from reading far too many hate comments about himself from next: origin story and promoting with songs that really, really embarrassed daesung, it took him a hot minute to fully adjust to idol life. he wasn’t sure what people thought of him (and as much as he tries to come off like he doesn’t care what people think, he definitely does), so he tried to shrink his presence as much as he possibly could. if for no other reason, then to at least get rid of the general public’s idea that he was arrogant. but by 2016, impulse had started making music that only slightly embarrassed daesung & he became more comfortable with the amount of attention that was on him. moreover, he become more comfortable with the love that his fans so readily gave him. he wanted to give them just as much of himself, even though the expected distance between idols and their fans made it hard to do so. since 2016, he’s been walking along a thin line more often than not, trying to get as close to his fans as he possibly can without ~breaking the illusion~ as his managers have so elegantly put it, even though daesung will argue that he’s not a magic trick and there shouldn’t be an illusion to begin with. he loves inpulses very, very dearly and constantly dishes out reminders in any way he can. he wants to be his best self for them ― not because that’s part of his job, but because he genuinely cares about who they are beyond a view count and nameless comments. their love and support is what keeps his spirits up and he wants to give them the same strength, no matter what. (aka daesung will never understand why he has to play a character instead of jus bein able to ACTUALLY be there for his fans)

#𝐃𝐀��𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆. playlist.#2000+ words of pure nonsense tbh #i honestly don't rec reading this BUT #the songs are fire so i do rec listening to those

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chpkns · 4 years ago

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BEST ALBUMS 2020

Some albums I enjoyed during quarantine.

Hon Mentions: Campfire Chords - Arkells, A Written Testimony - Jay Electronica, All In One - Jaunt, Punisher - Phoebe Bridgers, Alfredo - Freddie Gibs and Madlib, Thats What They All Say - Jack Harlow, Western Swing & Waltzes and Other Punchy Songs - Colter Wall, This Place Sucks Ass - PUP, Only For Dolphins - Action Bronson, Black Habits - D Smoke, What’s Your Pleasure - Jessie Ware, 3.15.20 - Childish Gambino, Dedicated Side B - Carly Rae Jepsen, Dark Lane Demo Tapes - Drake, After Hours - The Weeknd, color theory - Soccer Mommy, Circles - Mac Miller, Womb - Purity Ring

10) Future Nostalgia - Dua Lipa

One of the lesser, although still significant, tragedies of the 2020 COVID era was that weddings and sweaty club basements the world over were robbed of Dua Lipa’s prolific output this year. Future Nostalgia is hit or miss in places, but the hits come hot and heavy delivering banger after 80′s-disco-inspired banger. Dominant summer jams “Don’t Start Now” and “Break My Heart” are the highlights here, along with “Levitating” (equally good with or without DaBaby). Sleeper tracks “Cool” and “Hallucinate” round out the year’s best pure pop album.

Highlights: Don’t Start Now, Break My Heart, Levitating, Physical, Cool, Hallucinate

9) Women In Music, Pt. III - HAIM

The third album from LA’s sister act rock trio HAIM delivers consistency and growth for the band. There’s plenty of retro heartbreak rock on Women In Music, Pt. III to satisfy fans of HAIM’s first two albums, but lots of new on offer as well including the jazzy Lou Reed inspired sax of “Summer Girl” and Danielle Haim sounding positively Joni Mitchell-esque on “Man From the Magazine”. The auditory production flourishes of erstwhile Vampire Weekend member Rostam are noticeable throughout and help stretch the bounds of the HAIM sisters’ signature Wilson Phillips meets Fleetwood Mac summer rock sound into something more of the moment.

Highlights: The Steps, Summer Girl, Don’t Wanna, Man From the Magazine, FUBT

8) My Turn (Deluxe) - Lil Baby

I’ve almost given up on trying to enjoy or understand most “new rap” but every now and then something breaks through that I connect with for some reason. Atlanta rapper Lil Baby’s My Turn was that album for me this year. There are many reasons I feel I should not like Lil Baby’s music, from his liberal use of autotune to his mumbling delivery, but something always drew me back to it and, listen after listen, it grew on me. Lil Baby’s flow is persistent when he locks in, with matching driving trap production from Quay Global, Tay Keith and others, mirroring in sound the story of Baby’s rise from the streets to prison to the studio. The standout track is late addition “The Bigger Picture”, Lil Baby’s protest anthem on race in America, policing and the turmoil following the killing of George Floyd by police, a political statement from an otherwise apolitical artist, showing that Lil Baby has much more to offer than bravado and autotune.

Highlights: Grace (ft. 42 Dugg), Forever (ft. Lil Wayne), No Sucker (ft. Moneybagg Yo), Social Distancing, The Bigger Picture

7) Miss Anthropocene - Grimes

The third major studio release from Montreal native Claire Boucher, better known as Grimes, doesn’t reach the same highs as its predecessors - 2015′s electro-pop masterpiece Art Angels (which rated number 1 on this list for that year) or 2012′s Visions, the synth-laden fever dream that introduced Grimes to mainstream notoriety (number 2 on this list for 2012) - but it’s still very much worth the time. The vibe of Miss A falls somewhere between Grimes’ previous two albums, and a little darker and messier to boot. Grimes sounds a bit like she’s playing a concert for the end of the world, which feels a bit prophetic for an album released just before a global pandemic took hold. As always, Grimes is out to flex her muscle as a technician and across the album’s ten tracks she mixes diverse sounds ranging from rave synths to banjos showing how far her craft has come since making Visions on Garageband in her Mile End apartment.

Highlights: So Heavy I Fell Through The Earth, Violence, Delete Forever, 4ÆM, You’ll miss me when I’m not around

6) evermore - Taylor Swift

Spoiler alert, this isn’t the highest ranked Taylor Swift album on this list. Surprise released in December, evermore was an early Christmas present to fans of Swift’s surprise summer album folklore (more on that later). evermore continues Swift’s reinvention from pop star to indie singer-songwriter, assisted by songwriting partner Aaron Dessner of The National and a variety of indie darling guest stars - this time around featuring HAIM, The National’s Matt Berninger and another stunning guest turn with Bon Iver. Speaking of Justin Vernon, the album capping title track might be the single best song on either folklore or evermore. And for fans of Taylor’s earlier catalogue like me, the return to country music on “no body, no crime” is like reconnecting with an old friend. evermore is a little messier and less consistent thematically than its sister album, feeling a bit like folklore’s b-sides. But when your b-sides are better than most artist’s a-sides, why not release another album’s worth?

Highlights: ‘tis the damn season, no body no crime (ft. HAIM), coney island (ft. The National), cowboy like me, evermore (ft. Bon Iver)

5) RTJ4 - Run The Jewels

Walking the streets of my neighbourhood with the first listen of RTJ4 in my earbuds, I found myself actually crying at the thought that I would not get to see Killer Mike and el-P perform these songs live in the summer of 2020. The memories of RTJ festival sets past came rushing over me in a wave. That was my first “damn, I miss live music moment” of the pandemic. The fourth instalment of Run The Jewels’ historic rap partnership is more of the same in the very best way. Like the dynamic duo’s previous three instalments, RTJ4 is in your face, moves at a frenetic clip, and takes no prisoners. There’s even another album highlighting collaboration with Rage Against The Machine’s Zack De La Rocha. The politics of RTJ4′s tirades against inequity and the police state feel even more imminent in 2020 against the backdrop of George Floyd, the ensuing protest movement that gripped America, and the 2020 presidential election. I really hope we get a chance to see Mike and el-P tour these songs in 2021, the world needs it.

Highlights: ooh la la (ft. Greg Nice and DJ Premier), goonies vs. E.T., walking in the snow, JU$T (ft. Pharrell Williams and Zack de la Rocha), a few words for the firing squad (radiation)

4) Saint Cloud - Waxahatchee

The majestically twangy folk-Americana of Saint Cloud, the fifth solo album from Katie Crutchfield (stage named Waxahatchee after Waxahatchee Creek, Alabama, where the singer grew up), is a nostalgic cure for the ails of 2020. The soft bluesy rhythms of Crutchfield’s songs feel like a lazy long summer day spent by the water. That was something we needed this year. The songwriting is just as beautiful. The standout track, “Fire”, speaks to Crutchfield’s journey finding sobriety and reconnecting with her southern roots. It also speaks to a longing feeling “give me something / it ain’t enough / it ain’t enough”. On “Arkadelphia”, Crutchfield croons: “We try to give it all meaning / Glorify the grain of the wood / Tell ourselves what's beautiful and good”. In the chaos of 2020, the calm oasis of Saint Cloud is certainly something beautiful and good worth enjoying.

Highlights: Can’t Do Much, Fire, The Eye, Arkadelphia, St. Cloud

3) Suddenly - Caribou

Suddenly was my first genuine pandemic listen and, in the early days of lockdown, I found myself going back to it again and again. So much so, that the opening haunting notes of “Sister” became a kind of touchstone as I adjusted to a weird new work-from-home lifestyle. The chilled out weirdness of Caribou was an extremely welcome presence in 2020. It had been long enough since 2014′s Our Love (2014′s number 1 on this list) that I’d forgotten how enjoyably quirky Dan Snaith’s floaty pseudo-house tunes could be. Suddenly is a little more laid back than the club ready Our Love, which maybe suits it more to a world where dancefloors are closed. The tunes are also tighter, more economical in their length and soundscape. The lead single “Home” sounds downright commercial (in a good way) with it’s motown sampled chorus. Other parts of the album, like the closing “Cloud Song” venture into more experimental territories. All throughout, however, are Caribou’s signature warm chord progressions inviting you to lose yourself in them. Whether you’re looking for a guided meditation or an at-home dance party, Suddenly was the perfect 2020 album for it.

Highlights: Sister, Home, Lime, Never Come Back, Ravi

2) Cuttin’ Grass, Vol. 1 : The Butcher Shoppe Sessions - Sturgill Simpson

2020 was full of unexpected things, many bad but some surprisingly delightful. Firmly in the latter category is Cuttin’ Grass, Sturgill Simpson’s surprise double album made up entirely of bluegrass covers of his own catalogue. A true product of 2020, Simpson recorded the album with a murderer’s row of contemporary bluegrass artists after recovering from COVID-19 and challenging his fans to raise funds for charity in exchange for recording a new album. That album became Cuttin’ Grass, a traditional bluegrass re-imagination of the greatest hits and hidden gems of a country artist who has always strived to avoid being labelled as a country artist. The songs feel effortlessly at home and are given new life amid the frenetic guitar and mandolin picking, flying fiddles, and twangling banjos. If Simpson’s ode to the revelatory experience of psychedlic drug use “Turtles All The Way Down” felt revolutionary on 2014′s Metamodern Sounds in Country Music, it feels like an old standard here with its tempo pitched up and enveloped in the cacophony of the bluegrass ensemble. There is some good old fashioned heartbreak to slow things down too. Mandolin player and backup vocalist Sierra Hull shines on “I Wonder” (a cover of a song originally recorded by Sturgill’s former band Sunday Valley) as she joins Simpson on the chorus: “Tell me am I the only one / drinking and cursing your name?” The juxtaposition of Simpson’s unconventional country catalogue with the most traditional of country music styles just works and the entire hour can be listened and relistened for days. And if you’re still not satisfied, the companion “Volume 2: the Cowboy Arms Sessions” released in December brings back the same supporting cast to explore more of Simpson’s catalogue.

Highlights: All The Pretty Colors, Breakers Roar, Time After All, Turtles All The Way Down, Voices

1) folklore - Taylor Swift

Well, I told you there’d be more Taylor Swift on this list, and here it is. Your number 1 album of 2020 is folklore, the surprise release pandemic project in which the world’s biggest country star turned pop star reinvented herself again as an indie artist. Unlike anything else Swift has put out since RED, nothing on folklore is designed to be played in a stadium. Rather, it’s all more at home in a cabin by the fire, or in your earbuds on a fall walk... basically, it’s music meant for 2020. Like its companion evermore, folklore is the product of Swift’s songwriting collaboration with The National’s guitarist Aaron Dessner. The melding of songwriting styles seems like an odd match at first but sounds like a match made in heaven. Lyrically, Swift’s songwriting makes an evolutionary leap, almost leaving her primary auto or semi-autobiographical comfort zone behind completely (other than, perhaps, in heavily veiled metaphor) in favour of invented stories and semi-historical world building. After a few listens, you discover that the same characters appear in different songs like the imagined history of Rebekah Harkness, the real life former inhabitant of Swift’s Rhode Island home, on “the last great american dynasty” or imagery of “battleships” that “sink beneath the waves” in the ghost story of “my tears ricochet”. In the so-called “teenage love triangle trilogy” of “betty”, “cardigan”, and “august”, Swift tells different parts of the same story from the perspective of different characters. Each song stands on its own, but the discovery that the pieces fit together is wonderful. “betty” is the standout track for me, as a long suffering fan of “country Taylor”. In style, it harkens back to her earlier work, but in substance it’s something new entirely as Swift sings from the perspective of James, the boy who has done wrong by his lover and is seeking forgiveness. The pinnacle of the album is “exile” Swift’s collaboration with Bon Iver’s Justin Vernon. The call and response interaction of Swift with Vernon’s true to for emma form baritone is chill inducing. Like so many of the unexpected good things in 2020, folklore came from throwing plans out the window and doing what felt right for the moment. This is Taylor Swift making the music she wanted to make. In Dark Knight fashion, it’s the album we needed, if not the one we deserved. It’s the best album of the year.

Highlights: cardigan, the last great american dynasty, exile (ft. Bon Iver), my tears ricochet, epiphany, betty, peace

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mymarvelbunch · 5 years ago

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Be Your Own Hero - Steve Rogers x Reader

This is my first imagine, so feedback is greatly appreaciated!

Masterlist

Summary: (Y/N) has lost all her family and most friends in The Decimation (I refuse to call it The Blip). Refusing to believe their deaths are permanent, she dedicate years to find a way to reverse it. When she finally finds something that might help, she searches for the Avengers. It’s Steve Rogers x Reader, but there is also a lot of Badass!Reader. Also, Non-American!Reader. If you are American, think of a country you’d have loved to be born into :D

Warnings: for now, only a lot of sadness.

Note: Y/Co = your country. Y/Ci = your city

Steve won’t be featured in this part, only mentioned, and not in any romantic light, since the reader hasn’t met him yet.

Part One

A week after The Decimation

A huge memorial was prepared for every inhabitant of (Y/Ci) who dusted away. It was raining, as if Mother Nature was mourning with them. You stood in the far back, black umbrella open, all by yourself. There weren’t many people to keep you company. The few friends who survived had family members to stay with.

The vice-mayor (who was actually mayor now, since the old one was gone) made a heartfelt speech in honor of the fallen ones, but you barely paid any attention to it. Mentally, and in whispers, you recited the names of all the loved ones you lost: your mother, your father, your two older siblings, your sister-in-law, your only uncle and his wife, your 5-year-old cousin, your 89-year-old grandma who blissfully escaped Alzheimer’s. You had around forty friends, close and not-close, but now only twelve remained, and only two of them could be called close friends. Not to mention your college class, cut down from 48 to nine. You haven’t even counted the college staff.

It was surreal. Mass extinctions have happened before in history, but not like this. This wasn’t natural. The Avengers have called international press to explain what happened, but for most it was hard to understand.

For most. Not for you.

You searched Captain America’s video with the full, most detailed explanation and watched a dozen times, writing everything he said down. Apparently, an alien ingrained with Malthusian mentality used powerful items to wipe out half of the universe, believing that it would delay civilization’s self-destruction due to lack of resources. At one point he slipped the term ‘infinity stones’.

You haven’t had time to search about those ‘stones’ or anything else from the video (like the alien’s name, Thanos), but you fully intended to. Because there was surely a way to bring everyone back. Their deaths were result of magic (or whatever they called it), and magic can be reversed.

You refused to believe your family was lost forever.

You refused to believe that so many lives, families, hopes, dreams and achievements were gone for good.

There had to be a way out. And, while she hoped the Avengers would find a way, you decided to take matters into your own hands too. Everyone was mourning; you had the ‘advantage’ of having no one to comfort, meaning more time in your hands.

The memorial ceremony was over. After most people left (around two hours later), you walked over to where your family’s names were. “Mom, Dad”, you whispered, “I’ll do everything in my power to bring you back. I promise.”

A year later

Your graduation party was small and intimate. Your dusted classmates were properly honored, and, thanks to everyone having got closer in the following year, you all had a good time together. It was, overall, incredibly sweet.

You were now a doctor. Not so long ago, you’d be overjoyed by finally getting your medical degree. You were still happy, but the feeling was overshadowed with grief. You wish your family was there to celebrate with you.

At least your two close friends were there. They even brought their remaining parents to help cheer you up.

But now, you had a task: work to save money to keep your research.

The year had been productive, especially given the mess that was college. Thanks to Black Widow’s leaks from 2014, you progressed rapidly.

The so-called Infinity Stones had a few mentions, notably concerning the Battle of New York in 2012. The ‘Tesseract’, which seemingly fell in that category, had been mentioned in SHIELD files since the 50s; apparently, Captain America himself had come in contact with it in his war time. There is a mention of a Captain Marvel and the Tesseract in the 1995 files, but all were vague, as if SHIELD itself didn’t know who were dealing it. Probably an alien.

There was a mention of an Aether in 2013, which seemed powerful enough to be an Infinity Stone. The leaked files, obviously, ended in mid-2014, meaning there is nothing on the incident on Sokovia.

News sites and channels mentioned that the AIs created by Tony Stark had been powered by ‘an unknown object that seems to be a remain of the alien invasion of 2012’. There was no description, but there were pictures of Vision that featured a glowing yellow round-shaped thing. There was no way to be sure, but you’d guess it was also an Infinity Stone. Besides, Captain America’s announced that Vision was destroyed by Thanos right before the Decimation. Wouldn’t it be reasonable that the alien did that to steal a Stone?

Of course, you were far from being the only person researching on the Infinity Stones. In fact, so many were doing it that the Avengers (Natasha Romanov this time) had to make a press conference for a few statements:

1. There were no Infinity Stones in their possession.

2. They would not confirm nor deny whether they were ever in possession of a Stone or not.

3. As it was too dangerous, they would also not disclose information on the Stones.

It meant you had to hack into... somewhere to find more information. That held you back, since you didn’t have time to learn hacking abilities and finish college at the same.

Now that you graduated, you had more free time in your hands. You’d work few hours a week, enough to get money to survive. All your family’s inheritance belonged to you, which granted you more than enough money for you self-assigned mission.

Seating down, you opened your computer and started the next step of your research.

Early 2020

Hacking was useful, but not in the way you expected.

There was little new information concerning Thanos and the Infinity Stones. Most things you found were conspiracy theories, most of which were absurd and didn’t match the knowledge you already had.

However, Deep Web proved useful in one thing: you found out about the Mystic Arts and its Masters.

Information was vague and of questionable reliability, but you managed to gather that they possessed knowledge of many things ancient and alien. You also managed to find out their nearest temple’s location: Y/Ci! Ha! There was even an address!

It was near Valentine’s Day, meaning streets were crowded. You decided it was the best moment to search for that temple (which they called Sanctum). The best to hide, in your opinion, was in a big crowd.

Your first place of search was the given address, of course. Its street was crowded as hell, since it was a commercial one, full of shops that were perfect for buying valentine gifts. Good thing you didn’t find a boyfriend; there was no one to distract you from your goal.

(Were you obsessed? Maybe.)

The number on the address belonged to an oriental-styled house, something not really common in Y/Ci. You knocked on the door of the supposed tarot-reading house, hopeful that there was more about that place.

“Good morning, miss”, the woman who opened the door said. “Are you here for tarot reading?”

You took a deep breath and said, in a low voice, the sentence you read as being the password for entering a Sanctum: “Oh, I’d love to know if I was a Titanic victim in my past life.”

(God, it was such a ridiculous phrase. That was probably why they picked it; not even an insane person would willingly say that in a tarot house.)

The woman arched her eyebrows. You bit your lip, waiting for her to call a psychiatric ambulance, but she simply smiled. “Follow me, sister.”

You released your breath.

Next part

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Hey, everyone! Hope you liked it! Feedback would be greatly appreciated :D

The MCU barely acknowledges the repercussion of Natasha’s leaks in Captain America: The Winter Soldier. I imagine most people wouldn’t read all leaked files, but, after the Snap, many would try to find explanations in those leaks. After all, Thanos was an alien, and everyone knew SHIELD was behind the Battle of New York (among other events). I do suspect there would be little information on Captain Marvel (a codename to hide Carol Danvers’ identity), since there is nothing said about her until the after-credits scene in Infinity War, and no one aside from Nick Fury and Maria Rambeau (who is not SHIELD) really knows what happened in 1995.

I’m not sure whether the events of Thor: the Dark World would actually be on a SHIELD file, since I haven’t watched Agents of SHIELD, but I guess the more information the better! However, there is no indication in the movies that SHIELD ever came into contact with the Master of Mystic Arts, which is why the reader doesn’t find anything on them until she goes to the Deep Web to find answers.

Part Two will be set mostly in the Sanctum and focus on what the reader finds there. If you have any suggestion on what you’d like to read in this part, you’re welcome to tell. The reader won’t meet Steve until part 3, but I think she’ll meet one or two Avengers by the end of part two, so stay tuned!

Taglist is open if anyone is interested! See you next time!

#steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x reader #marvel #marvel cinematic universe #Steve Rogers #captain america #infinity stones #steve rogers x y/n #y/n #imagine #marvel imagine #avengers: endgame

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