#we're winning this evening yeahhh

[magnusbae]

Happy news guys, Zag had upgraded from "those" to "little sprout" 😂😂😂

[angel-of-the-moons]

Chocolates vs Aliens Pt. 2

Symbrock x Pregnant!Reader

TW/CW: NSFW, SMUT, PiV sex, unprotected sex, fluff, pregnancy, childbirth, anxiety, mentioned somnophilia (consented), lactation kink(?), oral sex (f! receiving)

MINORS DNI I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR CONTENT YOU CONSUME

Taglist: @yoink-a-doink @jayfall93 @being-worthy @theflamingraven

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Every day passed meant it was another day your baby girl grew, another kick, another day closer to being able to hold her in your arms and see her tiny face.

Of course, Eddie and Venom were excited, too. You guys moved fast, but everything came in stride, as if you were together for years. Despite the strange circumstances surrounding the three of you, you were content. Eddie and Venom treated the baby as if they fathered it, and you couldn't be happier. Even if you and Venom were in a constant battle for dominance when it came to chocolate. (Spoiler: you almost always won.)

You especially loved it when Venom cradled your belly. He did it at every available opportunity he could snag. Eddie meanwhile took care of a few more mundane things, splitting with Venom the duties of helping your changing body as your due date closed in on you.

Eddie would massage your feet and swollen ankles, while Venom's inky body would surround your midsection, taking the weight of the baby up off your hips, easing the strain on your back...

But your favorite day so far has to be today.

Because right now, you were currently watching Eddie and Venom snap at each other as they struggled to assemble the crib you ordered online.

No written directions were included, merely pictures of most of the crib already assembled; and the two already had to take it apart three times to start over.

"No, that part goes to that part and that one goes there!" Eddie snapped as the symbiote held a screwdriver and a piece of the railing in a long inky tendril.

Venom growled deeply, "WE ARE NEVER BUYING ANYTHING FROM IKEA EVER AGAIN!"

"No the fuck we are not." Eddie huffed. "We're better off buying furniture at a goddamn yard sale!"

You giggled from where you rocked on your reclining chair, your belly heavy and rounded out; effectively making you look like you swallowed a melon whole.

Eddie and Venom snap their heads to pout at you.

"What're you laughing at?" Eddie asked.

"Yeah, we'd like to see you try to put something like this together!" Venom snorted.

"Nah, I already have my hands full putting together something waaaay more intricate." You snort back, looking through the cozy baby clothes you'd bought yesterday.

New Years was approaching, and you knew full well you would be due around then, and your poor tiny baby would be absolutely freezing! So you took the preemptive and bought little newborn winter clothes for your girl, including a cute little fluffy teddy onesie with a hood that had cute little ears on it.

"Oh, yeah?" Venom asked, narrowing his eyes skeptically.

"Yep." You pat your tummy, and the skin shifts as a tiny foot kicks from within.

"...Okay yeah fair point." Eddie chuckled, shaking his head.

"Yeahhh, mommy wins again!" You grin, patting your belly once more, earning yet another eager kick as you imagine it to be a high-five.

"What, are you keeping score now?" Eddie sighs, pointing the screwdriver at you.

"Damn right I am." You grin. "Mommy points for the win!"

"And how many points do we have?" Venom inquired, tilting his head.

"Not enough to beat meeeee~"

Both of them snorted and shook their heads, before turning back to the task of assembling the frustrating crib that would soon, very soon, cradle your newborn daughter.

If Eddie or Venom ever put her down, that is.

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Christmas came and went in what felt like the blink of an eye. Your little celebration was small, and you even invited Mrs Chen over to join in on your festivities.

Which mostly consisted of pizza, a sandwich board, and chicken wings, plus a few homemade goodies that Ms Chen brought with her. Not the best meal idea, but it was a party, and damn those wings were good.

You and Venom even gifted Sonny and Cher a nice little seed treat you baked for them as a Christmas present for being "such good birdies".

Baking for chickens, now that was a first. But hearing their happy little clucks as Venom petted them and talked baby to them was absolutely adorable and worth the trouble. As were the large eggs afterwards!

Your mood swings had petered out about two or three months ago (you weren't sure, but Eddie insisted when you didn't break into tears watching a documentary about penguins) and unfortunately, well...

There are other symptoms of a pregnancy that you really thought you could stave off. You tried, you really did, but Venom having such heightened senses and being able to pick up on your scent and hormones? Oh, yeah. You were screwed.

Literally. In several different ways. You'd only had sex once or twice in a previous relationship, and with how disappointing that was, you definitely preferred to handle your urges yourself.

Where your ex-partner previously failed, Venom and Eddie were overachievers.

Taking great care with your belly and baby, they did whatever they could to ensure you were comfortable before making you so strung out your brain could barely form a coherent thought. Between Venom's tongue and Eddie's hands, you were a whimpering, trembling mess when the two would take you to bed.

Venom was especially ravenous in his sexual appetite. After learning more about sex and the pleasure it brought since bonding with Eddie... Where his host was a meal, you were a full-course desert that he would lose himself in.

Some nights, when he would climb through your window, he would immediately seek you out, drawn in by the lingering adrenaline from the hunt and the smell of you.

When you weren't moving about your apartment, Venom could find you in bed, sleeping fitfully. That was when he would crawl up under the blankets and find his way between your legs, not letting up until you woke up a panting mess.

Yeah, definitely the best way to be woken up, in your opinion. There were worse ways. Waaaay worse. Especially because your pregnancy-libido certainly wasn't complaining, the rush of endorphins afterwards would help outweigh the growing anxiety as the days passed.

Every day meant you were closer to your due date. Every day meant you were closer to experiencing possibly the worst pain you will ever feel in your life.

And there was the chance something could go wrong, that your baby could get stuck, or the umbilical cord could wrap around her, or she could be in a breech position...

You feel Eddie's hands gently encircle you, lazily draped over your shoulders as you sat in the shower chair, the warm water pattering over you two. It was New Year's Eve, and you two decided a calm, relaxing shower was a nice way to unwind before you poked your head out of your window to watch the fireworks people would inevitably launch to usher in the new year.

"Hey, sweets." He said to you softly, his thumbs brushing your collarbone softly. "We can feel your pulse jumping like crazy. You okay?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, I just..." You sigh.

"Liar." Eddie chuckled, bringing his large hands to your shoulders to press his thumbs into your weak spots, making you shiver and drag out a soft noise from you.

"C'mon." He urged gently as he massaged you, sending delightful shivers down your back and to your toes and all the way back up again.

"You can tell us, sweets. You thinking about the delivery again?"

You deflate a little, the bliss of his skilled hands drifting away from your grasp as the weight of your baby's birth came back to your mind.

"...Yeah. I'm just... I'm so, so worried, Eddie." You say, feeling your lip begin to wobble.

"I've read so many horrible things online of how it could go wrong, and..."

Venom's head suddenly slinks around you until his strange body is stretched so he could look you in the eyes.

"But there's also good things." He rumbled. "You might have a quick birth, not having to go through it for hours or even days..."

"And hey, you might even be one of those ladies who sneezes and pop! The baby's out!" Eddie added in, making Venom groan.

You can help but chuckle at how absurd it sounded, and you knew Venom was inwardly cringing at such a naive suggestion.

"I doubt I'll be that lucky." You sigh, a smile finally gracing your soft lips.

"Hey! You never know!"

"Idiot." Venom huffed.

"Shithead." Eddie smirked.

You feel your anxieties settle a bit, at least for now.

Your hands trail over your belly, over the thin purple lines crossing your skin, your fingers gently caressing the rising and falling bumps as your baby shifted and rolled around inside your womb.

"...Willow." Venom suddenly said.

You and Eddie blinked and stared at him, brows raised and eyes large, a long silence filling the shower as the water ran over you.

"What?" You ask him.

"For a name. You're gonna be due any day now." He purred, leaning his face closer to your belly.

"Still haven't settled on one."

"Where did you hear that name, Vee?" Eddie asked, shock evident in his tone.

"In some TV show I flicked through when you two were asleep. I like it." He replied simply, pressing his muzzle to your belly, feeling the tiny feet and hands thrash out from within.

"Okay, as far as names go that's... actually a good one." Eddie murmured.

"...Willow." You repeat softly.

It was a beautiful name. And honestly... You liked it. You had yet to pick a name for yourself, indecision being your worst enemy your entire life made the process that much harder.

Picking a name was one of your fears, too. You wanted your daughter to have a wonderful one; one she could carry with pride, and the pressure you placed on yourself to pick the perfect one was what screwed you up on that.

But this name, the one Venom suggested felt... right.

"Yeah." You smile once again. "Yeah. Her name can be Willow."

Venom grinned a shark-like grin and nuzzled his face into your belly like a happy affectionate cat, purring like one, too.

"Well, I'm glad that's a weight off of you." Eddie chuckled, resuming his earlier massage into your shoulders, earning another blissful sigh from you.

Yeah... Things will work out. After all, as long as you had these two with you, you felt like you could handle anything.

You relaxed and leaned into Eddie's touch, a little whimper escaping you as his thumbs knead into a knot in your shoulders.

Venom grinned up at you, and you knew fell the glint in his eyes meant you were in trouble.

And you knew that Eddie had the same smirk.

"No point in hiding it, sweet thing." Venom growled lowly, his tongue laving out to taste the skin on your hip, tracing the stretch marks etched into your skin.

"We know what gets you going." Eddie said quietly, leaning in to whisper in your ear.

You shivered when Venom's tongue slithered lower, past the swell of your midsection and down to your twitching clit.

"It's n-not my fault..." You whined, your voice cut off by a breathy moan as you felt Venom's tongue squirm past your entrance and into your tight, gummy walls.

"Of course not." Eddie hummed, massaging your shoulders as you arched your spine as little as you could; Venom's inky body slinked around you, enveloping you and keeping you from slipping off the shower chair in the process while he proceeded to eat you out with voracious hunger.

Eddie hissed suddenly, his fingers halting in their ministrations to squeeze you softly.

"Eddie, what--" You panted.

But that's when you felt it. The water was getting cold.

"Maybe we should move this to the bed, hm?" Venom cackled.

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"Eddie, fuck..." You whimpered fingers gripping tight into your bedsheets as Eddie rutted his nose against your clit, his lips and tongue dancing through your soaked folds as his hands pawed at your hips, bringing you down closer every time you squirmed away.

As Eddie devoured you, part of Venom's mass was completely surrounding his cock, sucking and stroking in time with his tongue as it pushed and pulled against your weeping cunt.

It was too much, and not enough at the same time. As much as you wanted more, you also wanted to push him away because the sensations were beginning to become too much for you to handle.

Your eyes were rolled back into your head as you felt that blissful feeling begin roll into a roaring crescendo, threatening to overtake you and make your heart patter out of your lungs.

God, you wished your belly wasn't in the way so you could see what he looked like between your legs. One day, soon.

Or, well... At least once you were fully recovered after the birth. Which would probably be a while.

You were so lost in Eddie's mouth working you over that you didn't notice Venom leering at you, saliva dripping around his fangs as his eyes narrowed to barely-there slits, focused intently on your heaving breasts; both long since swollen and sensitive as your milk came in.

You certainly didn't notice the small beads of hazy white liquid beading up and threatening to roll down the soft mounds of flesh as your orgasm approached.

"Oh, fuck--" You gasped, weakly rolling your hips to meet Eddie's eager mouth.

For a split second, you hear Venom snarl softly, before all of a sudden his mouth was on you, latching onto your pebbled nipple, his tongue rolling and squeezing your breast to get out every drop of that sweet liquid he could.

"Fuck." Eddie groaned, pulling back to breathe heavily.

Venom made sure Eddie could taste your milk as he drank from you readily, the flavor coating his tongue and flooding his taste buds to combine with the sweet taste of your nectar that coated his face and chin.

It was an intoxicating combination.

Eddie's eyes rolled a bit as he dove back in, aggressively sucking and nipping at your clit, gently prodding your entrance with his fingers as Venom proceeded to try and drain your breasts of all their milk.

All at once, the combined feelings had your mind blacking out, every muscle tensing as you came; your teeth snagging your bottom lip between them and you made a loud moan, barely able to string their names out of your mouth as they helped you ride out your orgasm.

Eddie pulls his mouth away from you and rises to his knees while Venom pulls himself free (albeit reluctantly) of your breast, licking the stray rivulets of milk that had begun to run down the sides of your tits.

"So sweet, love." He purred, licking his chops. "But we need more."

Venom's head merged back into Eddie's body, his inky mass slinking down his arms until it was comfortably arching your hips and back off the bed while Eddie rutted his sensitive cock against your sensitive cunt, still fluttering and clenching around nothing as the remnants of your orgasm waned.

But every lazy stroke of his hips sent little bolts of lightning arcing through your nerves, stretching out the little aftershocks just a bit farther as he carefully slid his cock into your hungry cunt.

"Fucking tight." Eddie hissed through clenched teeth, his eyes pinching shut.

"Not gonna last long, sweets." He rasped.

Between Venom working his cock over and edging him while he ate you out, and how your silky wet heat enveloped him so wonderfully tight, he could already feel himself getting lost in your body.

"Eddie, please..." You keened, your fingers going to grip at his wrists, your nails digging into his skin with each plunge of his cock into your needy hole.

He was careful with you, trying not to jostle you (and the baby) too much as he fucked you.

You felt the pressure build up low in your belly once more, squeezing down and sending another tight feeling down your spine as you became hyper-aware of every vein in his cock as he glided in and out of your hole.

"Almost, baby, almost..." Eddie breathed, wriggling one of his wrists free so he could brace it in the pillow by your head to give himself a bit of leverage as he rocked his hips into yours.

He could feel his orgasm climbing fast; sweat dripping down his brow as your delicate hands slid over his shoulders. The way you bit your lip and locked eyes with him only drove him further into no man's land.

"Fuck." He moaned weakly, his pace stuttering and dragging out as he felt the first volley of cum shoot out of his sensitive tip.

He had enough control to pull out, rutting his hips over your belly as the rest of his cum shot over your swollen belly and twitching pussy, his cock once more rutting against you as he came hard.

Your teeth grit and your nails dug in as Eddie buried his face in the crook of your neck, panting hard into your damp skin as you feel a sensation you were almost familiar with burst low, a fresh burst of wetness gushing from you are the pressure on your lower spine builds and tingles.

"Oh, fuck." You swallow. "Eddie."

"Yeah?" He asks, pulling back to look down at you with an almost cocky smile on his face.

"I think my water broke."

He and Venom both immediately began to panic.

"WHAT?!"

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The scrambling to get to the hospital moved by you in a blur. One minute Eddie was hastily dressing you in one of your sundresses, slippers, and a pair of panties, the next you were carried like some sort of fairytale princess down to the car park.

Good luck getting an ambulance out to your place tonight...

Eddie and Venom bickered the whole time to your car, your hospital bag prepped and slung over Eddie's shoulder as he guided you down to your car.

They sat you in the passenger seat and helped you buckle in as the first set of contractions ripple through you. As the pain flashed, you couldn't help but be reminded by your earlier concerns.

You read that some women felt pain for days, or hours before their water broke. Why were you only feeling it now? Was that a bad thing? Was something wrong?

Fuck, you knew it would hurt, but... you weren't prepared for the sudden sharp stabbing. You expected it to start as a throb and build from there, not immediately start out like someone was hacking away at your lower half.

When you arrived at the hospital, Eddie had actually slipped and busted his ass on the freshly mopped floor in his haste to fetch you a wheelchair.

You would have laughed, if you hadn't been gripping the safety handle in the car, screaming as another sharp jolt stabbed through you.

A few nurses even chased him out, harping about how he could have a concussion from falling, but quieted when they saw what had him in such a frantic rush.

Your baby girl was coming, whether you were ready or not.

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It had been close to four hours, and you were almost ready to deliver; nearly fully dilated, as your obstetrician cheerfully announced, a smile so cheerful and calm you almost kicked her in the face.

She was less impressed with Eddie, however, as she pulled him out of the delivery room to talk.

"We'll be right back, luv." She assured you sweetly.

"Uh... Is--is everything okay? You were saying they were okay, and--" He blurted out nervously.

"No, no, she's fine." She assured him, pushing her glasses up her nose once more.

"Then what..."

"I couldn't help but notice how hesitant she was to tell me how she went into labor. But I have to know, did she fall? Injure her belly in any way?" She questions.

"No! No, god no." Eddie said, waving his hands and shaking his head. "Nothing like that!"

She crossed her arms and tapped her finger on her bicep, a thick brow quirking upwards on her freckled brow.

"...Were the two of you having sex?"

Fuck.

Shit.

Fuck fuck fuck.

FUCK.

"Uh... I, er..." Eddie put a hand on his hip and scratched the back of his head, casting a look into the room where you were read-faced and sweaty while the nurses wiped your face with a towel while your hands gripped the handles in the birthing chair you were seated in.

He blew a puff of air out of his cheeks.

God, he wanted to crawl into a hole and die. The embarrassment of the situation was too much for him, having this teeny tiny Irish woman stare him down.

"I'm not judging you." She says flatly, not letting him escape her microscopic gaze. "But I have to tell you that there is a reason we tell pregnant patients to avoid penetrative sex, or excessive sex this late into their third trimester. It can make them go into labor."

She clicked her tongue and sighed. "You're lucky that she was so close to her due date that the baby isn't in any real danger. But it was still reckless. Regardless if she consented or not, this sort of thing can be dangerous, you hear me?"

Eddie wilted, feeling very much like a puppy who got caught wee'ing on the carpet, shame and mortification filling every inch of his body. Even Venom felt this way, cringing internally at the truths the doctor spat at them as she gave her lecture.

Her rant was cut short when you made a sharp yelp, jerking and clutching at your belly and one of the nurses came rushing to the doorway.

"Doctor O'Halloran, she's ready. We can already feel the baby's head. Looks like this baby wants out now!" She said, absolutely calm and no concern in her voice. If anything, she sounded excited!

Eddie meanwhile was frantic as O'Halloran clicked her tongue again, checking her watch with an almost bored glance. "Huh. Look't that. Well! Let's get this baby out of her! Adjust the chair so she's a bit more comfortable."

She grinned at Eddie, "Well? C'mon, Papa! You better be in here to see your baby girl!"

He felt his heart surge and flop in his chest when she said that. It was finally settling in.

Papa.

Their baby. Their baby girl.

Eddie had scrambled to behind the chair, leaning forward to wrap his arms around you.

He was glad he had Venom to strengthen his body, because god, could he swear you had suddenly gained incredible super strength as you began to push, crying and screaming as your lungs were squeezed of air, the pain so blinding you had actually fainted for a few seconds, all while not losing your inhumanly tight grip on his hand.

You had shouted more obscenities than Eddie and Venom had ever heard you swear, in between crying and apologizing for saying them and fainting like a messed up cycle.

Doctor O'Halloran assured Eddie this was normal rather calmly as you came to yet again, just to cry and scream again as your body struggled to push the baby free of your birth canal.

The smell of blood immediately had Venom wanting to surge forth, despite knowing there was nothing he could do for you currently except support you from inside of Eddie as you endured the most painful struggle of your life and he bore witness to something he'd never seen with his own eyes.

The bringing of a life into the world.

It hurt the both of them, to see you hurting so badly as you strained to bring Willow out for the world to see. Thankfully, as Venom had hoped earlier in the night, your birth was going quickly.

Not painlessly, of course, oh no. Definitely not painless.

"The moment we get home, I'm bonding with her. I know I can do it." Venom whined within Eddie as you sobbed in pain. "I want to fix her. I don't want her to hurt anymore after this."

Eddie silently agreed, hoping you would consent to melding with the symbiote to heal the damages your body was going through to birth your baby.

They just wished that you didn't have--

All at once, your body went slack and your eyes shut, but before the boys could panic any further, a tiny, ear-piercing wail filled the room.

"A girl! A nice set of lungs on her!" O'Halloran laughed as she scooped up and handed the newborn off to the nurse. She knew that Eddie (and Venom of course) were too preoccupied between staring in awe at the squirming purple body the nurse held to focus on cutting the cord.

All they could think about was her.

She was here. In front of them. Finally.

Those tiny feet that kicked out at them all this time, the little head they could feel shift around in your belly...

The nurses adjusted the chair enough to allow you to lean back, and Eddie covered your face in kisses, waking you up again with a mad grin.

And, heaven fucking bless you; amazing, gorgeous, powerful you, you smiled back. A tired, watery smile as you cried in victory.

Giving birth and being birthed was the closest thing that someone could come to dying and still come out of it. Many were not so lucky, but they were glad you were among the majority that emerged from this bloody struggle with a smile on your face and mirth in your bloodshot eyes.

The nurses wiped your baby down a bit before pulling your gown down to place her squirming, hiccuping body onto your bare chest.

Your hands weakly went to cradle her warm body, kissing the top of her head where a patch of fuzzy hair was.

"Hey, sweetheart." You sniffled, whispering against the wet fuzz.

You could barely get words out as emotions surged out of you all at once, overwhelming your body and mind as you cradled your precious child.

Almost immediately as your voice washed over her, it was as if the angry baby instantly calmed. It was like your soft, happy sobs were a soothing balm to her squirming body.

Neither could tell who moved it first, but Eddie's hand went to cover yours, Willow looking positively teeny beneath his large hand, watching in awe as her tiny, fat little fingers clawed and groped at your chest.

The sounds of loud booms from outside filled your ears, making her jump and wail once more as you coo'd and murmured to your baby.

"Hey, Eddie?" You sniffled, looking up at him.

"Y... Yeah?" Eddie asked, his throat tight as tears began to build at the corners of his eyes.

You tipped your head and kissed his jaw, weak and tired.

"Happy new year."

You were only faintly aware of the nurses cheering; both the healthy baby you birthed and in celebration of the new year ahead of you.

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They kept you at the hospital for another two days after you gave birth. After passing the placenta and remaining viscera of the birth, your body felt like literal tons of strain had been lifted from you.

And of course you, at the same time, felt like you had been tackled unprotected by a professional linebacker.

So, of course as soon as Venom offered to ease your comfort and repair the damage you agreed. It would certainly save on the recovery time. Sure, it would be hard to explain during your next checkup, but you'd cross that bridge when you got to it.

Ms Chen had gone to the hospital, as she was practically the closest thing either of you had to a mother and she wanted to see the baby. She carried an armload of supplies with her, too. Including some kinda balm that frankly stunk of something akin to menthol, but whatever it did, it certainly eased the pain on your poor nethers.

And of course, she gave a shit-eating grin when you named her honorary grandma.

Even Eddie's ex, Anne, came with her fiancee to congratulate him and coo over the adorable little bundle he so proudly cradled in his strong arms.

He certainly had nurses swooning, but you knew their eyes were only for you. Especially after he cried some more when you wanted his name on her birth certificate.

Right now, you watched as Willow suckled on her cute pink pacifier that Anne had slipped down to the gift shop to buy while they were at the hospital.

She was dressed in a soft two-piece to ensure the remnants of the umbilical cord weren't too aggravated, her cute little face pinched as she grunted in her sleep, exhausted from feeding and content as you carefully swaddled her.

Eddie came up behind you as Venom's head emerged from his body, all three of you looking down as your newborn dreamt whatever dreams babies had. Probably about her next feeding time.

"She's so fucking cute." Eddie sighed dreamily.

"I know! And she's so chunky." You giggle. "I had a real meatball of a baby. No wonder I was so big."

"Nah, you're beautiful." Eddie chuckled, kissing the skin of your shoulder that had been exposed by your oversized T-shirt. One of his, for sure, but he didn't mind.

Venom purred in a near-silent content, before turning to look at Eddie with a shark-like grin, sending a thought telepathically for only him to hear.

The thought made Eddie choke and start to laugh as he buried his face in the crook of your neck.

"What? What's so funny, you ginormous dorks?" You snicker.

"Ah. Eh..." Eddie said, grinning widely. "...Vee says he calls dibs on the next one."

"Next one..?" You say, your brows furrowing.

"Yeah... the next one. He wants to be the one to knock you up next time."

"Oh, my god!" You gasped, spinning around to slap at Eddie's shoulder while he and Venom laughed. "You two are horrible! Have mercy on my poor body!"

Venom leaned in, nuzzling the pulse in your neck.

"We didn't hear a no..."

[gubbles-owo]

For the tail rating: Asbestos (arknights), Ho'oleyak (arknights) and W (arknights)

HEAVY HITTERS RIGHT AWAY, HUH??

okay, so like. i want to be fair, right? i'm less interested in ranking tails *against* each other so much as I am in appreciating the variety of them. but like. if i had to choose the best tail in arknights. IF WE'RE ALL BEING HONEST HERE,,, yeahhh Asbestie would win this one absolutely no fucking contest. It's long. It's got volume. It's dexterous. It's WET. if you try getting your grubby little paws on the thing she will bear no hesitation in kicking your fucking teeth in for even thinking about it, so on top of all these amazing qualities it is also FORBIDDEN. lord knows there is only one person on terra who knows how it tastes, and I bet she's addicted to it. Asbestos tail rating: i need to choke on it Next up is- wait oh my fucking god jesus fuck. ign christ holy shit.

sorry to be such a lesbian but. god. fuck. focus here gubby. okay like i said i'm not really ranking tails against one another here, but ho'ol would certainly give asbestos a run for her money. it definitely would win out in the length department, because christ look at this thing

hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it's long as fuck. it's swift and silent, imbued with terrible strength. in her spoken voicelines she DIRECTLY references the doctor (u) choking on her tail. not from her tail or otherwise implying some kind of choke-hold, nonono. ON. this thing is going down your fucking throat and you are going to like it. ...i wonder what it tastes like. admittedly i did not finish lone trail before the event closed, but even from what i saw, the written descriptions of ho'ol's tail. some lucky tail enthusiast had a field day describing how her tail moves about in detail so intricate i can only describe it as fetishistic. and that is a COMPLIMENT goddammit. if this tail does nothing for you then i am sorry bb but there's no saving you. Ho'olheyak tail rating: i need to choke on it. and i suppose with that it's time to bring things back down to earth, because, okay if i'm being honest w's tail is. fine? but like. man given the previous two this just doesn't hit the same way...

The barbed shape is kinda neat, but in general this thing is pretttttty thin. If you know me at all then you know where i stand on the whole thin vs. phat tail debate, so I can't say W's tail impresses me all that much. Very thin, but very light and I imagine pretty quick. I wonder how sharp the end of that thing really is, but I'd guess that's it's likely safe to touch. I'm still in chapter 6 and admittedly don't know much about W as a character yet, but I imagine she'd either cause petty mischief with it in some way or alternatively get all embarrassed pissed if it's accidentally touched. I wonder what it tastes like. W tail rating: i am probably going to step on it (by accident)

[allnightstay]

Day 14 - Lose 🏆

Summary: Yuji, Nobara, and Megumi have all been told to stay inside for their protection. In the meantime, they decide to go head-to-head in Mario Kart 8 to kill their boredom. The consequence for losing is... well, you'll see.

Lee: Nobara

Ler: Megumi & Itadori

A/N: This was actually supposed to be a part one, but then I realized Day 13 is Win, and I wrote it as Lose hehe soooo I'm about to write Day 13 noww. But anyways, enjoy!

"Ugh this sucks!" Nobara didn't want to be stuck in a room with these two fools. She'd so rather be out shopping, but here they are, all together.

"Why don't we play a game? I heard you've got some gaming skills, Nobara." Megumi suggests.

"I have Mario Kart 8, wanna try that?" Yuji asks, motioning to his Nintendo switch. "We can do a whole winner does this or loser does that."

"Ohhoho you don't want to play me, I've mastered the whole game already!" Nobara proudly says.

"Fine. We can play Gojo's way." said Megumi, no emotion behind his words.

"Gojo's way?" Both Nobara and Itadori say, looking at each other and back at Megumi.

"Yeah, and even better. I won't tell you what it is until it happens." A small smile crept on Megumi's face.

"Umm, okay. A little sus but I'm down." Yuji sets up the system, luckily he had 4 controllers so they'd all be able to play.

A three round match begins, and the kids all spout words of anger, cheer, and swearing they'll win.

Until Nobara lost.

"No fair!!! Let me see your character builds!" She yells. "See!! You have your controller safe thing on, I had mine turned off!"

"What is she talking about?" Itadori asks.

"Ohh, I didn't even notice. Yeah she's right. It's the smart steering. I completely forgot to turn that off. Oh well, Nobara, you ready to hear what your punishment is?" Megumi asks, even though she's still protesting.

"No! We should rematch!"

"Hmmm, alright, but you should know what happens if you lose again." He says.

"Fine, tell me then."

"Loser gets tickled for 5 minutes." Again, no emotion.

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?" She yells, "This is Gojo's rule!?"

"Ohhh yeahhh, he does that sometimes haha. It's supposed to motivate us to try harder." Itadori says, scratching the back of his head with a big ol' smile on his face.

"Ugh fine! But I'm not losing this time, you can count on that!" She was confident she wouldn't lose.

But she still did.

"No way!! How!?" Nervousness crept up inside Nobara as she knew what was coming.

"Alright Yuji, ready to do this?" Megumi asks, already moving towards Nobara.

"W-W-Wait!! I-I- You should be asking ME if I'm ready!" She starts backing up.

"Well, a deal's a deal. It's only 5 minutes Nobara. It can't be that bad right?" Itadori says, moving in along with Megumi.

"I mean yeah, no, w-wait! I don't think I can handle thihihis!" She starts giggling because Megumi has grabbed her legs and is now pulling her in. Itadori moves to the opposite side, grabbing her arms to sit on top of them.

"It'll be real quick, don't sweat it!" Yuji says all cheerfully, annoyingly.

Megumi straddles her waist and both boys begin attacking the poor girl whose completely pinned beneath them. Yuji trails his fingers down her arms while Megumi starts making little pokes around her tummy.

"Wahahahait! Ahahaha, no guys plehehehease I'm really tihihiHIHICKLISH!!" Yuji has reached her underarms, and Megumi found a particular spot poking her hips.

The dual sensation of both spots being targeted is what made her lose her composure.

"Well, this will be fun then won't it?" Megumi says, now smiling.

"We're all a lil ticklish, right Nobara?" Itadori unnecessarily teases.

"NAHAHAHA OHOHO MY GOHOHOD!!! *squeal* AHAHHA HEHEHE NOHOHOHO!!"

"No what? You're not ticklish? Come on we can clearly see that you are~" more teases from Itadori.

"SHUHUHUT UP!!"

They continue on until the 5 minutes are up. Both boys climb off and Nobara smacks both of them on the arm.

"Not cool!! Ugh!!" She fixes her hair, grabbing the controller. "I need payback. Now!!"

"Ahaha are you sure about that? You might lose again." A smirking Megumi replies.

"There's no way in hell I'm losing now." Nobara needed that payback asap.

What's funny though, Megumi thinks to himself, she never asked us to stop once. Hmm ....

-----------------------------------------------------

[b4b3tte]

SURPRISE!

Summary ˙✧˖˚꩜ — You and Kano almost shared something very intimate during a mission, but looks like your enemies had intentions on accidentally interrupting

Request ˙✧˖˚꩜ — “ “ you and Kano had some tension between you two before recently you guys almost shared a kiss 2 weeks ago on a mission on a military base but obviously went to shit as it was ruined when Sonya and Johnny made a surprise ambush with Cassie& the others BUT THAT IS BESIDES THE POINT (Imk if u want a singular fic on that) “ YES DO000000 “

Pairing ˙✧˖˚꩜ — Kano!Mk11 X Gender!Neutral!Reader

Authors Note ˙✧˖˚꩜ — Sorry this took so long!! This is a little backstory of one of my other Fanfic Series of “ May The Best Man Win “ so if you’d like you can read them to get a little background on which this was based on!! I hope you enjoy this, if you have anything else you want to request put it in my inbox or if you want to be in my taglist !!

Tag list ˙✧˖˚꩜ — @smokethefatass69

As both of you were called to seek any material assistance from special forces, you out of all people had to be paired with Kano to look privately further into the military base making you think why couldn’t you get paired with Erron or skarlet

but of course Kano didn’t mind, and you wouldn’t either If he wasn’t such a horn dog, you are lucky enough if you could even get him to shut up for 5 minutes, but that is always ruined by another flirt comment towards you, flattering but annoying.

Slight time goes by, the occasional ducking and hiding and whispering, the occasional compliments from Kano, the occasional telling him to shut up and he rarely does, what you didn’t expect was to actually share a moment he earlier suggested during the mission like a hundred times

The air was thick with tension as you and Kano embarked on a clandestine mission, venturing into the dark corners of a military base in the midst of the Kronika Chaos. The night was your ally as you moved silently, shadows concealing your every step.

Kano, always one to seize an opportunity to flirt with you, guided you to a secluded area, away from the prying eyes of your allies who were on the mission with you. His grin was a mixture of mischief and anticipation. "Well, luv, looks like we've found ourselves a little hideaway. Time to make the most of it."

You chuckle at one of his attempts to do something risky at a place of work and say while keeping a look out for anyone coming “ yeahhh, over my dead body Kano. “

As the two of you found cover in the shadows, the tension between you heightened. The gravity of the mission was momentarily eclipsed by the magnetic pull drawing you closer to Kano.

His voice was a low murmur, his breath brushing against your ear. " aww don’t be a sore luv, What do you say we make this mission a bit uhh more memorable?"

The moment hung in the air, the world fading away as Kano's lips accidentally brushed against yours as you turn your head to face him, Time seemed to stand still, and the pressure of making sure you complete this mission without issues ceased to exist in that stolen moment.

As the time both of you realized how serious and intense the air became so quickly, you completely forgot about your surroundings that you guys are in a vulnerable stop to be attacked, so as you guys decide to fulfill in what seemed right

Looks like the universe had other plans. The sudden arrival of Sonya, Johnny, and their allies like Cassie and Jacqui, shattered the clandestine scene. The promise of the kiss remained suspended, a promise interrupted by the abrupt intrusion.

Johnny Cage, ever the obnoxious showman, raised an eyebrow. "Well, well, what's going on here? Our lovebirds trying to spice up the mission?"

That snarky comment earned a embarrassed eye roll from you but a proud smirk from Kano

Sonya's stern gaze cut through the tension since she wasn’t wanting to deal with any bullshit right now. "Save it, Cage. We're on a mission, not a romantic escapade."

Kano, undeterred, grinned at the interruption. "Oi, it's not my fault the universe is conspiring against a bit of fun."

Let’s just say that embarrassing moment that Johnny will never stop bringing up Everytime you see him, certainly made that mission memorable like Kano wanted

As the mission continued, the tension lingered, adding a layer of complexity to your interactions. The promise of the almost-kiss remained unfulfilled, and Kano's sly remarks fueled the unresolved desires.

Occasionally Kano would try to recreate that moment but instead actually get a kiss from you, but after the surprise ambush you realized you couldn’t let your guard down during work again

( better next time Kano💀☝️ )

THANKS FOR READING!! Likes, comments, reblogs, or feedback is appreciated and loved, thank you for reading hope you enjoyed, if you have any requests just type away in my inbox, if you wanna to know what I will or not write just look at my master list it is my first pinned post, thank you so much, Besitos!! 💋💋

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression: Vol.23 - Watching Hanshin vs. Orix in the Japan series.

·Kaoru explaining Hanshin's progress so far, imagining himself doing the ceremonial first pitch, and learning English through the window of the Hanshin Tigers.

J: Ah this is an important moment...whats his name? Dongu?

T: Not Dongu, TONGU.

J: Oh, Tongu! This must be the most important moment of the game so far.

T: Ah, it's exciting!

J: This must be the most important moment so far....go on, go on!

K, J, T: Aghhhh!

J: Eh?! Was that a walk?

K: No, no.

J: Its three balls, one strike??

K: Yes

J: The batter chose not to swing there, right?

K: Yeah

J: Or he just couldn't manage it?

K: Well, it could be either.

J: Come on, come on, come on!

T: Oh, a strike!

J: A strike?! Ohh, interesting from Tongu.

K: Haha, you just wanna say that!

T: Hang on, hang on! The broadcast started!

J: No way! We are on air already?? Leader, do the greeting!

K: Im Tongu.

J: Tongu! And im Hikomaro!

K: No, not Hikomaro, he isn't even there!

J: No, but there is that one who looks like him though, right?

K: Ah, Mune! Are you trying to mock him??

J: No no, the Orix players are...

J, K, T: Ahhhhhhh!

J: Yeahhh, lets go!!

K: This is what I like.

J: Crisis averted, right?

K: Yeah.

J: Easy going from now.

K: Ahh, we're off! At last.

T: Yeah, haha, at last.

J: Yep, and we can finally get started with Niconama too.

T: Oh, we're on niconama today?

J: Yes, we are! Look at all the comments!

T: Thanks for all the comments!

K: But we are also on Youtube too.

J: Yep, so today we are watching the 4th game of the Nihon series on the channel...what is it? Hulu?

K: Yes, Hulu.

J: Yes, so we are watching it on Hulu. We can't show you our screen, so if you have a spare screen, get it on at home too.

*Kaoru reaches behind to update the score on the white board, and writes a big 0 for Orix*

T: Ah, yes. This is Kaoru's job today.

J: What a big zero!

K: Yeah, I wanna fill all the rest like this too! haha

J: Haha, yeah. By the way, today's broadcast is titled 'Go go Tigers! Aiming for Japan no.1 special!!'

*applause*

J: So we are gonna have a drink while watching the game! We will do a toast soon, so everyone at home please have a drink ready too. Ok, Leader, its the 4th game, right? So, could you please explain what that means for people who know nothing about it (myself included), and tell us what has happened in the Nihon series so far.

K: Well, for the Nihon series, the first team to get 4 wins is Japan champion. Today is the 4th game, Hanshin won the first game, Orix won the 2nd game, and Orix won the 3rd game. We'll have to see what happens in the 4th game today.

J: So at this point, Hanshin have won 1 and lost 2?

K: Yeah

J: How did they score in that first game?

K: 8 - 0

J: Yeahhhh!

T: And Kaoru, did you say you were there for that game??

K: Yes, I went to Kyocera Dome to watch it.

J: Ohhhh! Where are our souvenirs??

K: I forgot, haha

J: You forgot to bring us souvenirs??! Thats the most important thing!

K: I left them at the studio, we've just been rehearsing for the tour. I did buy some Hanshin manju type things, but I left them all in the studio for everyone. I didn't bring any here.

J: Ahh, it would have been great to eat those now while supporting the team! Anyway, how was it at the game??

K: It was good, it was my first time to watch baseball at Kyocera dome, so it was quite refreshing.

J: Ahh, were there fewer Hanshin fans there?

K: Hmm, no, about half and half.

J: And it was a thrashing victory with 8-0.

K: Hm, is thrashing the right word? haha

J: Yes, of course it is! I bet you enjoyed it..How did you feel?

K: Oh, I felt great.

T: Haha, I've never seen Kaoru this happy.

J: You can see how happy he is with the way he just leaned back slightly then! haha. We don't see this very often. Look, that comment says 'I'm gad they won when you went'.

K: Yeah, absolutely. Because the next day, the score totally flipped, we lost 8-0.

J: Ahh, that badly? Leader, your presence is good luck for the team.

K: Yeah right?? I need to go to all the games.

J: Thats right! So what happened in the 3rd game?

K: That was yesterday at Koshien. We lost 5-4. We started to catch up towards the end, but couldn't make it in the end. Hanshin have a bit of a self destructive image when they lose. They tend to make a lot of errors and stuff. But they are not like that today...Anyway, in the 2nd and 3rd games, Orix gained the upper hand.

J: Hm, yeah. Hanshin couldn't take it back. And today is the 4th game...what innings are they in now?

K: The third innings.

J: And Hanshin are in attack.

K: Yes...Oyama, he just hasn't got the hang of it yet today.

J: Who is Oyama, what does he do?

K: He is a baseball player.

J: Yes, but what number/position etc?

K: He is number 3, and in first.

J: And despite this, he isn't hitting??

K: I'm not sure whether 'despite this' applies here, haha.

T: He just isn't hitting today.

J: Ah, he is not in good form today?

T: Yeah

J: But Hanshin are in the lead, right? How did they manage that?

T: Oh look, its Neuse!!

K: Ah, yes, good good.

J: Who was that?

K: Neuse.

T: Neuse is in good form.

K: Yeah, he is.

J: So now...

T: What?

J: Hm? Hang on?...Neuse leaves base, bottom of the third innings, Hanshin in attack, 2 out, Neuse hits, passes first base. Won't they score points from here on?

K: Yeah, I think so.

J: Ah, so its still ok.

K: Can't we have a drink yet?

J: Oh, ok.

K: Haha

J: Let me just explain the show quickly! Even if you don't like baseball, you can still enjoy this show. And we are always taking your messages, you all know this, right? Any, thoughts, comments, questions, please send them in. X (formerly Twitter) users can use the tag TFOE. The first part of the show is free for anyone to watch, but the second part is for channel members only, so you need to be a member if you want to watch to the end. If you join, you can watch this broadcast in the archives for 1 year, and there are also members only videos too, so please join using the link at the top of the screen. Also, in the second part of the show today we will be asking Kaoru all about the European tour scheduled for next year.

T: Loads of variety!

J: Thats right. You can't miss it!! Ok, Leader, its time for a toast! Everyone at home, join us too. Just a sec, Leader...ok ready now.

K: Joe, you can do it.

J: No no, you have to.

T: *raises hand* Ok, I'll do it.

K: *raises hand* No, I'll do it. (※This is a reference to a tv comedy skit by ダチョウ倶楽部/Ostrich Club, where the third guy is tricked into raising his hand to volunteer for something after seeing the other two raise theirs first)

J: Eh?! Who? Ok, Leader, you do it.

T: Agghh, haha

K: Agghh, of course, he doesn't watch tv so he doesn't get it!

J: Eh?! What?!

K: Nothing, nothing.

J: Ahh, Im sorry I ruined the joke!...Oh, it was that Ostrich method??

K: Of course, it was.

J: I just saw someone write it in the comments, haha.

K: Anyway, lets have a drink and enjoy watching the Nihon Series...Kanpai!

J, T: Kanpai!

J: So, Leader, they won when you went to the stadium, so we should support them as if we were there in the stadium today.

K: Of course!

J: That way it will help. If we half-heartedly support them, our support won't reach them.

K: Ahh, yes, thats right.

J: We've really got to be out of the ordinary.

K: Haha, you are so excited.

T: Joe, you know the least about baseball of all of us, yet you are the most excited.

J: No, but we've really got to imagine ourselves at Koshien! Is that where this is?

K: Yes...We have to?

J: Absolutely.

T: There is a comment saying Kaoru's hat is cute! Its unusual, right?

J: Was this a specially made item?

K: No, these are regular merch. It comes in different colours, even blue etc. You wouldn't be able to tell it was Hanshin merch just at a glance.

J: No, you wouldn't.

T: Isn't this one an unusual colour though?

K: I bought this years ago.

J, T: Ehh?

J: Ahh, yes, there is all sorts of Hanshin merch. You know, I wanted to wear that Hanshin happi to support the team today, but the staff forgot to bring it.

T: Haha, you should prepare that yourself.

J: I was thinking about wearing that pink happi, so I wore like totally room wear to go under it.

K: Haha, room wear? That doesn't matter.

J: Haha, well, whatever I'm wearing I'm at Koshien in spirit.

K: Yeah. Ah, I'll just update the scoreboard.

J: Oh, yeah. So, last time we had Morikawa Toshiyuki on the show, right? That was fun. What did you think, Leader?

K: Oh, I'm so grateful to him...Coming on a show like this.

J: Yeah, and he supports the Baystars.

K: Yeah, I felt sorry.

J: Yeah, cause they didn't do well, right?

T: Haha, he even came in here singing Rokkou Oroshi.

K: I'm really grateful to him.

T: There are not many people who know as much about professional baseball as he does.

J: He is such a great guy, we had a lot of fun. Yeah, we laughed a lot. If you are a channel member you can rewatch it in the archives. There are comments coming in saying it was incredible, and that Morikawa san was perfect at singing Rokkou Oroshi!

T: It would be good if we could do that kind of thing again sometime.

J: Yeah, last time was perfect though, with those talk topics and Morikawa san's personality. Anyway, today we are watching the Hanshin vs. Orix game, and I'm sure things will get exciting whenever the game heats up, but in the meantime the staff have prepared various fun things for us to talk about. So lets sandwich some of these in while we watch the game. The first topic is 'Dream ceremonial pitch'!

*applause*

J: Don't hold back, everyone! We gotta show our support! Ok, loads of different people have done the ceremonial pitch before, right? So I'm gonna ask both Kaoru and Tasai, if you were to do the ceremonial pitch, how would you do it? What music would you enter to, what would you wear, how would you throw etc, etc. Its a brilliant topic to talk about!

K: Who did the ceremonial pitch today? That rugby guy? The one who never smiles.

T: Was it Inagaki....?

J: Inagaki Goro? (*member of SMAP.....Kaoru is actually referring to rugby player Inagaki Keita*)

K: Not Inagaki Goro! haha

J: Haha, I don't know. Ah! Is it that half Japanese guy who looks like Inagaki Goro??

T: Haha, no no. Ah, *reading comments* it seems like his name is Inagaki though.

J: We just can't remember his given name.

K: Well, anyway, he did the ceremonial pitch today.

J: How do they actually choose who does it?

K: We should have asked Morikawa san this last time!

J: Right! He has done it before, hasn't he?!

T: I guess the team just choose someone.

J: Kaoru, have you ever been asked to do it?

K: Haha, no.

J: Oh, but to have a world famous musician like you sypporting them so much...!

K: No no.

T: What are they thinking by not asking you?!

J: Right?!

K: Guys, stop talking like this! They'll never ask me now, hahaha.

T: Hanshin players, please consider it!!

J: Look, there are comments saying they want you to do the ceremonial pitch! Anyway, Leader, if you did do it, how would you like it to be?

K: Hmm, well, I don't really like it when people try to make it all about them...

J: Ahh, some people are like that when they do this, right? I mean, I havnt really seen many people doing it though.

T: Yeah, it is often like that.

K: So, I would probably just go out, greet the crowd, and simply throw the ball.

T: Yeah, Joe, did you know, celebrities and such who do the ceremonial pitch often get booed if they try to appeal to the crowd to much. Its like, "Just get on with it!"

K: Yeah, cause no-one is there to see that.

J: Its unnecessary, right?

T: Yeah, sometimes that happens. But when Yanagisawa Shingo did it, they crowd was pretty happy....You know who that is, right?

J: Ah, yes, that comedian right?

T: Yeah

K: Well, if its someone very famous who everyone knows, it works.

J: Ah, its tough, it only works with big names. What does that comment say?

T: 'Degawa(Testurō) took his trousers off'...

K: Ah, someone like Degawa san is fun, you'd wanna see that, right?

J: Yeah! But Kaoru, you would just keep it very simple?

K: Yeah.

J: What about you, Tasai? How would you do it? Gyōza themed?

T: Im not all about gyōza, you know!

J: A gyōza shaped glove or something? Oh, what just happened in the game? He is out?

K: Yeh, at second base.

T: I mean, I'd probably want to do something UFO or kappa related. I'd do it with determination.

J: Well, Tokyo Sports are big enough misfits for that to work.

T: Haha, someone wrote 'throw a gyōza'

K: Throw a gyōza??

J: They wouldn't expect that!

T: They'd be asking me to leave! haha

J: Leader, someone just asked in the comments 'Would you do it if you were asked?'

K: Well, yeah, I wanna do it.

T: Hanshin, please consider it!

J: Ahh, so you wouldn't hesitate if you were asked. But, hey, its quite a long throw, right?

K: Yeah, I don't know if my throw would reach far enough. But remember, Morikawa san warned against practicing too much, or you'll be unable to throw on the day.

J: Yeah, but its a bit embarrassing if your throw doesn't reach.

K: Yeah, it might not.

J: What would you do then?

K: Well, yeah, cause most people have never thrown a ball from that kinda raised mound before, right? You have to throw it from above.

J: How high is that mound?

T: Quite high, but it depends on the stadium.

J: Really? So the pitchers have to maintain their accuracy even at different heights in each stadium?

T: Well, pitchers do have preferences about which mounds are easier or harder for them. And teams will even alter the mounds in their stadium to try to put the opposition to a disadvantage.

J: Ahh, to make it harder for them? This is such a grown ups' game!

T: Haha.

J: It all depends on so many factors, even with the top players.

K: Well, I guess because they are only active for a short time.

T: Kaoru, if you did the ceremonial first pitch, would you walk out to a DIR song? Like in that movie 'Major Leage'?

K: No no no, whatever the team preapres in advance is fine with me.

J: No, but I think the team would ask you about the music, since you are a musician.

K: No, I'd be fine with just a normal introduction, then just getting on with it. Playing a song of ours deliberatly, then walking in is really cringe!

J: Haha

K: I'd feel like apologizing!

T: Haha, I see.

J: Ah, whats going on with the game?? Do we need to check it?

T: *reading comments* 'Kaoru can throw towels to the 2nd floor'. Have you done that before??

K: Yeah, I think so.

T: Ehhh?! Do they reach that far?

K: If you drench them in water they do. And you have to throw underarm. Throwing overarm wouldn't work.

T: You are really good at underarm throwing. You throw all those picks too, right?

J: Yeah, and you squirt water out from your water bottle. I like that, its kinda kinky.

T: Haha, really??

K: Yeah, cause thats the only way Joe sees the world.

J: Its true!

K: Haha

J: I'm embarrassingly pervy about everything. Do you have a problem wth that? haha. Anyway, I'm going all out today, remember.

T: Ah yes, right. 'Joe always brings up dirty topics'.

J: Anyway, lets just check on the game.

T: Hirooka is doing well.

J: What doea Hirooka do?

T: He is a baseball player.

J: No, I mean his order and position etc.

T: He is number 8, but...hm, Im not sure.

*K eats cheese and ham snack*

J: This is no time to be eating ham.

K: But I'm hungry.

*J and T discuss the game for a few secs while K concentrates on eating snacks*

K: Mm, this tastes good.

J: Yeah, ham and cheese. I complained that the snacks were too cheap looking before, so now they are a bit more luxurious.

K: Ahh, ham, cheese, and crackers gives off more of a distinguished air, right?

J: Yeah. If people donate to us, we might get even better snacks.

K: Nah, I dont mind..You're the one who makes the most noise about this. Its you who got our bentos changed to curry.

J: Ah, yes! I really love that curry, but there is a yakiniku restaurant on the first floor of this building, right? And before now we've had yakiniku bentos, so today I avoided meat all day in anticipation, I was kinda disappointed we got curry again.

K: You're the one who made them give us curry!!

J: No, but this is the time and place for yakiniku! When are we gonna get yakiniku bentos again??

K: Haha

T: Joe, you are so noisy about food! You were eating more curry than us today!

J: Because I'd been saving myself all day! I was so hungry! You know that nice cafe nearby here? Its closed on wednesdays, so I couldn't go there. But I figured it would be ok if I was having yakiniku later. And then I almost got myself a steamed bun from the convenience store, but I decided not to in the end. And then I got here, and it was curry!! But actually, curry is more like Hanshin colours, so its for the best!

K: Hahaha, what a fuss.

T: You know, that curry comes with potatoes too? He was like, 'Ahh, maybe I shouldn't eat the potatoes..' But then he covered them in butter and ate them anyway.

J: Yes! And that led onto an interesting debate about whether this curry was made in Europe, remember?! Or was it a European style curry made in Japan??

K: Where are you going with this?? haha

T: Deflection, deflection.

J: If Hanshin win today, Kaoru, you should buy us yakiniku.

K: Oh, okay. Who knows what will happen, but thats ok with me.

J: Good, I can't stop thinking about yakiniku today.

T: You never shut up about food, haha.

J: I'm going all out today, remember?

T: Joe, the staff are trying to tell you something.

J: Huh? Ah, ok. Move onto the next topic about the Hanshin dictionary....thats enough about curry, haha.

K: We'll be getting complaints.

J: *reading comments* 'If Hanshin win, please sing Rokkou Oroshi'. Ah, yeah. Ok, so the next topic is about the 'Genius Japanese-English Hanshin dictionary' where many of the example sentences are Hanshin themed. I didn't realise something like this existed!

K: Yeah, I was surprised.

J: There are over 60 Hanshin related sentences. I think a lot of the editors are from Kansai, so thats why they made this version.

K: Oh, I see.

J: Yeah, so lets have a look at some of the examples. Are we gonna show them? No? I just read them out? Ok. For example the word 'atsui'. In English you'd say 'excited' - to be excited about something', right? So, the example is 'kare ha Tigers no koto to naru to, sugu atsukunaru'. Tasai, could you read that out in English?

K: Haha

T: 'He gets excited at any mention of the Tigers'.

J: Thats it! 'Tigers' at the end there, its great! The next one is 'uchimakuru' (hit a volley). I feel like thats not the type of word you'd usually need to look up though.

K: Right.

J: The example is 'Sakuya Tigers ha Giants aite ni hitto wo uchimakutta'

K: You never need to say that though.

T: In English, 'The Tigers got a lot of hits against the Giants last night'

J: Yeah, but with 'uchimakuru' the potential is there to use it. And you can use 'atsui' for people like me getting excited about sports. But the problem comes next, with 'oeru'...'to end something'. There is no reason to use this word about Hanshin, right?

K: Yeah

T: Haha

K: Yeah, its not a good meaning.

J: Yeah, because with hits and things, they still have that potential.

K: 'to end' is difficult to use.

J: The editors have thought hard about this one! The example sentence is, 'Kare ha Hanshin Tigers no guraundo seibiin toshite sono shōgai wo oeta.

K: It can be done! hahaha. But this sentence would probably never be used outside Hanshin fans.

J: No

T: Everyone, please check out this dictionary.

J: Yeah. Tasai could you read out the translation of that last one?

T: 'He ended his days as a groundskeeper for the Hanshin Tigers.'

J: Isn't this show great?! You can study English while you watch!

K: This one is good too.

J: Which one? Leader, which one do you like??

K: 'Tigers no roku senshu ga ponpon to home run'

J: haha

T: 'Six different players cracked....' haha

K: What does that even mean? Do we ever say 'ponpon to home run'??

J: You wouldn't have much need to say that to a foreigner.

K: But!! Today we will need to use it! Hahaha

J: Yehhhy, hahaha. And when that happens, you can say it in English, Leader!!

K: This one too, 'machigainai' (no doubt)

J: What does it say?

K: 'Tigers ga shiai ni katsu koto ha machigainai' (There is no doubt that the Tigers will win the game)

J: Ohhh, yeah. That, and ponpon are good. Leader, you will have to shout 'Ponpon!!' in English later.

T: How do you say it in English?.....'cracked'. It says 'machigainai' is 'on ice'....'The Tigers have the game on ice'

K: Shouldn't it be 'nice'? Or is it supposed to be 'ice'?

J: It might be an English idiom. They use idioms, like for heavy rain, there is an idiom about 'cats and something'

T: Oh, really?

J: Yeh, there is. How about this one.... 'ryūnin'. 'Fan no ōku ga Okada kantoku no ryūnin wo nozondeiru' (Many fans want Manager Okada to stay in office)

K: Well, there's no reason to make him quit.

J: Yeah. Ah, someone commented, 'Kaoru, make an example sentence'.... in Japanese.

K: A Tigers sentence?

J: Yes, and then the staff will use Chat GP and put it into English.

T: Thats a good idea.

K: Hmm..

J: Something that you wouldn't usually expect to see in a JP-EN dictionary. Anything is ok.

K: Hmmm.....uhhhh......'Jama'! (obstruction)

J: Jama?? Hanshin related?　Uhhh...ok.....jama.....uhh, ok.... go ahead...

T:...Uh..

J: Ah, ok, Leader then...

K: .Hm?...What are you asking for?

T: Right? haha

J: I've been talking too much, I'm too tired now, haha.

K: You want me to say the sentence, right?

J: Haha, yeh, I'm exhausted now, I'm just zoning out.

K: He's tired himself out after all that.

J: Haha, I'm 55, leave me alone! Haha, someone wrote 'Its mystery hour'. I don't know what I'm doing any more, haha.

T: Haha, you were so energetic at the start, and now you are totally burned out!

J: Yeah, ahhh, I'm tired. Ok, Leader, say your sentence.

K: Ok, so at their stadium, Koshien stadium....'kousokudōro ga jama de mienai'. (The highway obstructs the view of the stadium)

J, T: Ahhh

J: Really?

K: Yeah, its really close. From here to that wall is the same distance between the wall of the stadium and the highway.

T: Yeah

K: So you can't see the big 'Koshien Stadium' written on the stadium wall. (※TN: But you can if you drive on the highway past the stadium! 😁)

J: Ahhh, ok, well the staff will translate that for us. I think we should send this to the editors at Genius.

T: Someone wrote, 'Joe Yokomizo is the 'jama' haha.....ok, the English is 'Koshien stadium cannot be seen because the highway is in the way'. *laughs/snorts*

J: Ah, 'in the way'... you just snorted.

T: Haha, sorry. Put, 'Joe Yokomizo is noisy' into the translator!

J: Haha, the staff will put Kaoru's sentence and translation in the comments later. So thats how you can support Hanshin and study English.

T: Ah, Kaoru, you forgot to write the score. More 0s.

J: Oh, thats good.

K: Is it the 5th innings already?

J: Is the game running at a fast pace?

T: It is, yeah. Its still the first half of the game, right?

K: Yeah.

J: Mm, this ham is really good.

K: Haha, you've eaten loads.

J: Yeah, it tastes really good. So, for now they haven't changed the pitcher...

K: No, but we are in the lead.

J: There is a one point lead at the moment, but another two or three points wouldn't be bad.

K: Yeah yeah

J: Yeah, another point would be good. Which innings do you think they will really start moving in?

K: Oh, any time now. They are hitting a lot.

J: 86 throws so far, is that a lot for the 5th innings?

K: Hm, yeah well, the fifth innings might decide the game.

T: Just as long as they win.

J: Ah, yeah. Those Orix players are all really good-looking though, right? Like that Hikomaro guy before...

K: Remember who we talked about before though....Chikamoto.

J: Ah, Chikamoto, yes!

T: Hey, but its about time for the first part of the show to end, isn't it?

J: *talking with mouth ful of food' Yeah, so in the second part, we will go all out supporting, and we'll be talking about Dir en grey's...

K: He has no enthusiasm left!

J: *empties mouth* ...and be talking about Dir en grey's upcoming European tour, so please make sure you are a channel member. If you become a member, you can watch this broadcast in the archives for a year, and there will also be members only videos, where we try out lots of different things, so please check those out. Ok, here's how to join. There should be a blue link at the top of your screens now. Leader, please point to it. Please click this link to become a member. After you click it, you wil get a page asking you to choose your preferred payment type. Choose your method, click proceed, then enter your details. If you haven't joined yet, please do so to continue supporting Hanshin with us, and to hear Kaoru talking about the European tour. Ok, Leader, do you have any announcements?

K: The tour starts next week. I was just rehearsing today. It'll be fun!

T: I'm looking forward to it.

J: Kaoru, you said that with confidence.

K: Did I? Well, it will be. haha. Kawasaki is first, with the fanclub lives, I think Nagoya is after that.

T: Someone wrote they are going to Kawasaki, Haneda, Yokohama, and Omiya. Wow, thanks!

J: The merch info is out now too, yeah. Someone says they are going to all the dates!

K: Wow. You know, this really is the end of Phalaris. So please enjoy it.

J: People saying they are going to Wakayama, Niigata, some are joining in December. A question asks who designed the merch?

K: We all did.

J: They are looking forward to Wakayama.

T: Is it your first time playing in Wakayama?

K: Yeah.

J: Someone said its their birthday at Nagoya....Vol.3?

K: Yeah, Vol.3 is the final.

J: What merch do you recommend?

K: Recommend? Hm, the limited tshirt.

J: Is it limited to sale at the venues?

K: Yeah, but saying limited tshirt sounds a bit negative, so just look forward to it anyway.

J: Yeah, please look forward to the merch.

T:*looking at game* Oh no, Tongu.

J: Tongu...like thong sandals?

K: No, its 鈍宮, the kanji for don(鈍) and miya (宮).

J: It sounds like a summery name..

T: Anyway, should we finish here?

J: Yes, lets have a quick break here. The screen will change for a moment, but we will be back shortly with the second part, so please wait there.

T: People watching on youtube, please register on niconama too.

J: We'll be talking about the European tour too, it'll be fun! Ok, bye bye for now.

K: Yep, see you soon!

[strangefellows]

YEAHHH like you pointed out already limbus seems to be heavily focusing on lobcorp rather than lor since we’ve got two lc events compared to one lor event (although they could just be doing it in a pattern and the next one is lor)

I really hope they do start diving deeper into lobcorp lore because what the hell is up with the ordeals. what im getting so far is that ordeals are to abnormalities what peccatulum are to distortions, if that makes any sense. and the fact the white ordeals basically predicted the future with the library, and the midnight of white is an entire ass claw, how the hell did ayin get that?????

im pretty confident that a hypothetical sephirah meltdown event would firmly stick to the upper layer, mayyyybe tiphereth if we push it, but gebura would absolutely kick the sinners asses unless there are other nuggets around, which would be cool since the sinners have never had combat allies before

yeah yeah exactly!!! i think we might get more lor events, but the focus will definitely be on locorp -- that's the origin of the abnormalities, where it all began, and something we know little about in comparison to the library, which we saw built from the ground up firsthand more or less in lor; its lobcorp that still has so many mysteries around it, and given one of those is its ties to the smoke war, of which we have TWO (2) veterans of....it just makes sense to make it come full circle

which, again, ties into my ayin theory given that he is the beginning and so will be the end; the alpha and the omega.

YEAH tho the ordeals are fascinating, and absolutely how the fuck did the white ordeals happen. i think abel says something about them not being ACTUAL fixers/a claw but like. manifestations of the well of consciousness's representations something something. but even in that, like....how did they make them manifest???? and the lore we got in the event about how the ampoules/bullets work, that's delicious, and the bit about the regenerators....like, we're getting more lobcorp lore here then in lobcorp itself in some cases! esp about the agents!

which really really lends itself again to my theory because like, we're learning new things about lobcorp we didn't know IN lobcorp, while in the lor event nothing addressed there iirc was new to us, and that in and of itself says a lot.

yeah that could track bc they're the most straightforward in comparison to others in regards to mechanics. and oh my god oh my god that would be INCREDIBLE since thanks to verg in canto 6 we have precedence for npc assistance in battles. i would love that.

i just saw a post on twt relatedly talking about how strange it would be for ayin to see these randos show up to fight ordeals/etc and die and come back without his interference and god. GOD if we hear X on the intercom at some point i think i might just cease existing because that would be THE FIRST TIME IN THE ENTIRE FUCKING SERIES we hear him speak as a character because he had no voice in lobcorp and the narrator of the meltdown flashbacks was "A" not our boy X/the ayin i think is dante.

but like. fr tho. fr if we get a meltdown and dante does their thing like they do w the sinners thats it right there pack it up i win.

[poems-of-a-lover]

nick watches spiderman. again.

i have done this so much. the first movie was so long. this ones even longer. by like ten minutes but still. ANYWAY LETS GET GOINGGGG IM SO EXCITED

it should be noted that i spent thirteen dollars on this film and its so worth it

the opening music is SOOOO GOOD

this little motif that plays here is played a few times thru the movie and i love when movies do that sjdhfksjd its so fun to have little music cues that carry over thru the film

i heard someone say this was their least favorite spiderman and it breaks my heart i love it sm

anyway. richards killing things.

so basically hes killing the little spiders they worked on and just kinda running off rn

this is a surprise scene thatll help us later

i know what hes doing and why hes doing it but its a secret so i wont say until it comes up

OMG HEYYYY SO REMEMBER IN THE FIRST FILM WHEN THEY WERE PLAYING HIDE AND SEEK. THAT COMES BACK NOW.

he was recording a little video diary thingy =]

okay droppin him off at mays weve seen this part already

i know its important but cmon. places to be.

yippee mary and richard on the plane!!!

DUDE. MARY DIDNT WANT THIS. "did you see his face? hes never gonna understand. hes just a little boy." SHE DIDNT WANT TO PACK UP AND LEAVE HER SON THIS ISNT HER FIGHT AJKGHKJAHGS JUSTICE FOR MARY PARKER

"we're going to spend the rest of our lives looking over our shoulders, never feeling safe. we cant do that to him." funny u say that richard

okay mary is off to the bathroom. in walks flight assistance guy.

i feel like i gotta explain every little detail of this film bc it means so much to me and i need u guys to understand KJGHSKJDGH

flight assistant guy is washing his hands off and theres a little bloodddd on himmmmm yikes

richard sees but doesnt say anything bc obv

oops flight assistant has a gun. and hes locked mary in the bathroom. and he has a parachute. and he stole richards laptop. AND HE HIT MARY WHEN SHE ESCAPED.

fight sceeeene marys down

this scene is fun but theres no way in hell richard parker would be able to fight AND WIN

the planes going down they shot out the window

flight assistant guy is now out of the plane JKGSKJHGJK richard and mary go down with it but marys already gone before they crash, richard dies in the crash as far as i know, like thats whats implied

parents dead. time for spiderman.

PETERRRRRR PETER PARKER GUYS LOOK ITS SPIDERMAN ITS PETER HES ON SCREEN GUYS GUYS LOOK ITS PETER

THIS OPENING SWINGING SEQUENCE. I WANNA BE HIM SOOOOOO BAD U GUYS HAVE NO CLUE.

FUN FACT the movie made a mistaaaake and i caught it like my first watch. so theres this truck carrying plutonium that was stolen from oscorp that peters abt to go catch, right? and they say that plutonium is highly explosive. WELL ITS NOT. PLUTONIUM 238 IS BARELY A DAMN FISSILE ISOTOPE. SPIDERMAN. ITS USED AS A SOURCE OF HEAT AND ALPHA EMITTERS FOR SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH. STUPID MOVIE. and look they couldve just taken the name or something bc it sounds cool but cmonnnn its wronggggg

yeahhh the driver of the stolen truck is aleksei sytsevitch. remember that itll come back later.

this chase music is so good i love the score for this film

another motif here while hes swinging that comes back later ehehe

we are nine minutes in. argh.

"hey, mr criminal? hey, my names spiderman, you can call me webhead, you can call me amazing, just dont call me late for dinner, you get it? not a shaker, areeee you a hugger?" "i am killer!" "woah, okay!"

makes me laugh every time its so dumb

peters banter is so fun in this movie i love it so much

omg max dillonnnnn okay so hes walking with all these blueprints and they fall into the street and no one helps him but peter. guess if thatll come back later.

peter catches all the vials of plutonium. except for one. hes a bit dumb.

okay so peters o the front of this cop car and he looks over into the cop car next to him and who does he see but mr stacy! from the first film! "nick thats impossible hes dead" oh just wait GKHSKJDGHDSKJ

HIS RING TONE IS THE "spiderman, spiderman, does whatever a spider can" AND I LOVE IT

HIIIII GWEN MY WIFE I ADOREEEEEE THIS WOMAN

oh yeah theyre graduating today and peters late bc hes in a high speed chase. if i was allowed to decorate my cap it wouldve been spiderman themed.

HER SPEECH AGH im not gonna quote t bc its so long but it means the world to me

oh yeah aleksei sprays peter with the windshield wiper water thing i love that

gwen stacy the woman u are

again i love how they did gwen like they didnt just make her a basic love interest like in tobys films they actually gave her depth

OKAY SO. PETER RUNS ON STAGE TO GET HIS DIPLOMA. AND HE DOES THE DRAMATIC DIP KISS THING TO GWEN. APPARENTLY THAT WASNT SCRIPTED. it couldve been but its so much funnier to think it wasnt

HIIII AUNT MAYYYYY

theres a deleted scene here where the graduates are with their families where flash runs up to them in his cap and gown all excited and he tells gwen like "i made it i knew i could bc u believed in me" and they shouldve kept it bc it makes me so happy

"i know the next thing your unvle ben would say, dont just follow the path, make your own trail" "ralph waldo emerson" "no" "what do you mean, no?" "ben told me he made it up!" I WISHHHH BEN WERE HERE

ugh the way they both laughed over ben i love these two

aunt may says that she wishes ben were here and peter goes "yeah, and my folks" and mays smile drops a bit, her demeanor changes ever so slightly and she just "...yeah" THIS DOESNT SEEM IMPORTANT AND ITS NOT BUT IT MAKES SENSE LATER

im gonna finish this scene then continue in a rb this is getting long

i love that may tries to take a photo of peter and gwen and gwens like "cheese!! =D!" and peter is so awkwardly stood there like "cheeeeeese 😐"

she invites him to dinner with her family and she says shes gonna do her speech for him "over and over again, all night long" bc he missed ittttt aghhhhhhh

THIS. THISSSSSS. he watches the stacys take their family photo and then mr stacy appears in the background, and we flash back to the first film, his death, where hes telling peter to leave gwen alone. i am soooooo sad.

okay this dinner scene is devastating so! next post! i love this movie i have so many thoughts and were only 17 minutes in

[night-raven-miscellany]

i fear im a lil late for lewis day but LEWIS DAYYY HAPPY BDAY SILLY GUYY !! I COME BEARING SILLY BDAY ASK GAME EMOJIS >:D

can i pls order

🏠 , 🏝️ , 🗓️ , 🌹 , ☀️

for the birthday boyyyyy !!ヾ(≧▽≦*)o

(✨don't worry about it bestie! I literally didn't post the stuff for it until like. Halfway thru the day yesterday bc I was so busy so... Not as much bday time as I would have liked BUT!!! you win some you lose some.)

"Eh, Rusul, right? You're back."

"Well yea I just 'ad to take a short break. I've got more questions for ya so strap in, bud."

🏠

"So for starters, what's your 'ometown like?"

"Oh! Well it's this little (well, not little little but like. Big little) town called Tepartie (Teh-par-tee-aye) on the eastern coast of the Shaftlands. We're primarily known for three things: Tea, hats, and a HUUUUUGE festival we have annually to kinda showcase the different tea blends people have sold that year - like one giant tea party! It's a total blast... I'd love to invite people to go with me and James at some point when it pops up again."

"Sounds like a fun time t'me! 'f ya ever wind up going, make sure to 'it me up about it."

"Sure thing! I like inviting my cute lil underclassmen to experience the world with me, so you got it!"

"cute lil... You're a year older than me. What."

"Eh, don't think about it too hard, yeah? Anyways let's keep going, I'm sure you've got more questions."

🏝️

"Aight. If you were stuck on a deserted island, which of the students 'ere would ya take with ya?"

"hmm... Well as much as it pains me to say it, prolly the Tyrant himself... I could see him being resourceful and knowledgeable enough to help us survive. Granted this is all provided he and I are both willing to cooperate AND that the goal isn't to leave the island, but eh... I think it'd work. Maybe..."

"why would'ja take a guy who ya hate?"

"again, he'd probably just be a good bet for survival... At least he looks and acts like it. Could be super different in real life but eh. It's whatever, I guess."

🗓️

"Ok next question... A simple one, really: what'd'ya wanna do in the next year?"

"Simple indeed, my feathered friend. For me? I wanna boost my ratings, put myself out there for more people. That, and maybe get a good prank or two in on the Tyrant... Least I could do as his least favorite card soldier, y'know?"

"psh- 'f it's pranks ya want, I'm your guy! Can't really help with that first one all'at much, though... But I'll gladly 'elp ya with causin problems, fufufufu."

"Yeahhh, but id rather you not get dragged into collar shenanigans, y'know? Those things are a real drag to wear around."

"Eh. I've got my ways."

"what's that supposed to mean?"

"Moving on...

🌹

What's your fave kinda flower? Any meanin behind it?"

"I really like Irises, even if they don't really match my vibe. They're a flower that reminds me a lot of my bestie, so like. How could I not like it?! I guess I'm a big fan of Poinsettias, too. Nice and vibrant and festive. That's me all over!"

"Nice, concise, and to the point. I like that. Ok last question:

☀️

For the last one, just tell me about your typical mornin routine."

"ah, ok! Well... Usually when I first get up, I'm kinda a mess all over (not that I'm not already, hehehe), so first thing I try to do is just straighten up my hair so it falls in a less chaotic kinda way. My roommate tends to wake up early to get things done, so he's usually already up and about by the time I'm getting started, and he usually likes to make or bring breakfast for us from whatever's in the kitchen that morning. While I'm getting my stuff together, I'll eat, and then I make sure I've got all my stuff for my classes. Then it's just a matter of actually getting there on time."

"What keeps ya from doin that?"

"Being on time? Well. I'm just not a fan of having to rush too much. If I'm rushing or hurrying along, then there's usually a reason for it, and it usually isn't good either."

"Ah. Guess that makes sense.

Well, these answers 'ave been awfully 'elpful, but for now I gotta skedaddle back with 'em... 'ope ya 'ad a good birthday, 'atterson!"

[correctrvbquotes]

Fade in to Grif and Sarge talking

Grif: You wanted ta, see me, Sarge?

Sarge: Yes Grif, I think it's time we buried the hatchet. Started workin' more closely together.

Grif: Say what? Isn't that like a sign of the apocalypse or something?

Sarge: As you know, I've never liked you. Not even a little bit.

Grif: Really.

Sarge: You've always been lazy, insubordinate, and I suspect that underneath that helmet, you're probably extremely ugly to boot!

Grif: No argument here.

Sarge: Over the years I've been so disappointed in your work, I've slowly stopped giving you things to do. Most days, I forget ya even exist.

Grif: Yeahhh, it's been a good run.

Sarge: But I think we all need to realise that Simmons is not comin' back. Red Team is just gonna have to make do with the few worthless soldiers we have left.

Grif: Wait, didn't this start out as a pep talk?

Sarge: We may never know why Simmons left-

Grif: Yeah, maybe he was overwhelmed by all the positive reinforcement you give out.

Sarge: But the fact of the matter is we're at war! If we're gonna win this thing, we need to work together! We need to put aside our disgusting laziness and our constant attempts to kill each other in our sleep.

Grif: I've never tried to kill you in your sleep.

Sarge: Dammit Grif, this is a compromise. I realise I'm gonna have to give up some things as well.

[demonsfate]

ANONYMOUS SENT [T8 SPOILERS] . . .

lmao orz i'm sorry i thought you knew or something....but yeahhh word on the street is that our boy's ending is the good/canon one. or it might be pure guessing. unfortunately yeah, kazuya stans are gonna act up a lot more now.

it's okay! i understand 'cos usually i AM ahead of the spoilers/leaks lol! just as i said... no more (unless i speak about it on my blog lol!) just 'cos i REALLY don't wanna get spoiled more, ESPECIALLY if it's spoilers that are gonna kill my excitement! 🙊

it'll PROBABLY be the canon ending... but i just REALLY hope they make that clear. hell, even if they don't, we KNOW we're gonna get those stans saying "DOES ANYONE ELSE AGREE THAT THIS SHOULD BE THE CANON ENDING?!" and people saying they view that one as the canon. it's gonna be so so annoying. i think i'm just gonna stay AWAY from the fandom other than hanging out around here! :')

i'm really hoping the intention behind this is that they just want a fun "what if the bad guy did win???" ending and NOT because they want to cop out and have it so that both jin and kaz fans can be happy. because like. we've all been anticipating the jin and kaz fight for YEARS NOW. don't end it with "YOU get to choose who's stronger hehe!!! X3" speaking as a major jin fan, i would rather see jin LOSE than for both of them to "win" in alternative endings.

[tonyndum-e]

I just witnessed the best public lobby in the history of public lobbies and lived through 'enemies to best friends' trope so I have to tell you about it

Background: I was playing in the same lobby for at least five games and I was a crewmate every time, i was sussing myself at this point too lmao. I guess most of us were done with tasks so no one had (or wanted) anything else to do and we followed each other to security. There were 4 of us (yellow, orange, white and pink) and 1 impostor left. The party in security went on for like half a minute until pink vented in and out of the same vent, probably on accident. I ran off with someone else to call a meeting. (I'm yellow)

Yellow: it was pink

Yellow: you all saw pink vent in security right, everyone saw it

Orange: yellow vented

Orange: it's yellow

Yellow: howwww i was nowhere near that vent

White: pink vented i saw it

Yellow: see? thx white

Yellow: everyone saw it

Orange: you vented yellow

*we vote and there's a tie between me and pink - orange and pink vote me, white and I vote pink*

*we're all gathered in cafeteria waiting for the button so we're able to call a meeting but impostor calls the reactor and we ran off to the reactor and shut it down, at that time white disappears and orange and I try to get back to cafeteria through upper engine but the door is closed, i get killed by pink there, we lose (i think that's the only time my team lost)*

*on the dropship*

Yellow: ORANGE WHY

Yellow: YOU MUST'VE SEEN PINK VENT

Orange: BUT I SAW YELLOW VENT

Yellow: YOU DIDN'T, I WAS CLOSE TO THE EXIT OF SECURITY

Orange: I SAW YELLOW

Yellow: BUT YOU DIDN'T

(not even joking, that's the exact same conversation)

*the next game i get crewmate as well and i get sussed by orange again*

*the game after that orange and i do tasks together but on accident, at least i wasn't following orange, idk about him*

Orange: yellow is good

Orange: yellow was with me doing tasks

Yellow: yes orange is fine as well

Some color: finally these two are on the same page

*we manage to bond over that; next round i find orange's body in electrical (shocking) and report it*

Yellow: oh nooo orange my buddy

Yellow: i found orange in electrical noooo

Brown: f in the chat

Pink: f

Yellow: f

Brown: f

Everyone: f

Someone: did u see anyone

Yellow: no lol I'm just here to pay respects

*everyone skips (I don't know what happened after but ik we won the round)*

*a few rounds later i FINALLY get to be impostor with my buddy orange and i legit thought to announce to everyone I'm the impostor right away bcz i was too happy i got the impostor but since my partner was orange i kept it a secret and played it cool*

*orange kills and i find the body, i report it for some reason*

Yellow: storage

Yellow: idk i literally saw no one around there

Orange: skip then?

Yellow: yeah skip

*everyone skips*

*he kills again and report it again lmao somehow I'm lucky with finding bodies, we play it cool without getting sussed AT ALL and we get two crewmates voted off even, orange kills two more and we win*

Dropship:

White: i knew it was yellow

Yellow: lmao but i literally didn't kill anyone

Yellow: orange killed everyone

Orange: yeah lol

Yellow: i was gaining everyone's trust :)

Orange: gg tho

Yellow: yeah gg

*i never get impostor again but a few rounds later there's a meeting and orange keeps saying it's red but we already skipped, orange gets killed the next round and i find him*

Yellow: nooooooo orange died sussing red

Yellow: I'm voting red for orange

Red: that makes zero sense

Pink: oh nooo orange

Brown: for orange!

Red: idiots

*we all vote red and we win after getting one more impostor out*

Dropship:

Yellow: WE WON BECAUSE OF YOU ORANGE

Orange: yeahhh, thank you

Epilogue: the last round I did in the lobby, i got killed in electrical and orange found me, they got the right impostor and orange wrote 'avenged' on dropship and i thanked him. I also thanked everyone for being awesome and that that lobby was the coolest one I've ever stumbled upon and that I was sorry I had to go. Everyone was so sweet and it was an emotional goodbye but damnnn it was such a fun experience. And yeah, I really spent like 20 rounds in the same lobby and got impostor only once. I didn't know that was possible lol. Anyways, if i had any talent in drawing comics i would make a comic out of this story bcz it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen and it's 100% true but I still can't believe it.

[frattynattyladdie]

McQueen: OK... Here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. McQueen: One winner. 42 losers. I eat losers for breakfast. McQueen: Breakfast. Wait, maybe I should have had breakfast. A little breck-y could be good for me. No,no,no, stay focused. Speed. McQueen: I'm faster than fast. Quicker than quick. I am Lightning! Mack: (knock-knock)Hey Lightning, are you ready? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Lightning's ready. Song McQueen: Ka-chow! Song Seller: Get your antenna here! Fans: You got that right, Slick. Bob Cutlass: Welcome back to the Dinoco 400. I'm Bob Cutlass, here with my good friend, Darrel Cartrip. We're midway through what may turn out to be a  historic day for racing. Darrel Cartrip: Bob, my oil pressure's through the roof right now. If this gets more exciting, they're gonna have to tow me outta the booth! Bob Cutlass: Right you are, Darrell. Three cars are tied for the season points lead, heading into the final race of the season. And the winner of this race Darrell, will win the season title and, the Piston Cup. Does The King, Strip Weathers, have one more victory in him before retirement? Darrell: He's been Dinoco's golden boy for years! Can he win them one last Piston Cup? Bob: And, as always, in the second place spot we find Chick Hicks. He's been chasing that tailfin his entire career. Darrell: Chick thought this was his year, Bob. His chance to finally emerge from The King's shadow. But the last thing he expected was...Lightning McQueen! Bob: You know, I don't think anybody expected this. The rookie sensation come into the season unknown. But everyone knows him now. Darrell: Will he be the first rookie to win a Piston Cup and land Dinoco? Bob: The legend, the runner up, and the rookie! Three cars, one champion! Song Chick: No you don't. Fans: Oohh. What a ride! Chick: Hahaha Fans: Go get'em, McQueen! Go get'em! Fans: We love you, Lightning! Chick: Dinoco is all mine. Race car: Ahhhh! Darrell: Trouble, turn three! Chick: Haha. Get through that, Mcqueen. Bob: Ouw.. A huge crash behind the leaders! Fans: Wahh!! Bob: Wait a second, Darrell. McQueen is in the wreckage. Darrell: There's no way the rookie can make it through! Not in one piece that is. Mia & Tia: Lightning, ahhh. Darrell: Look at that, McQueen made it through! Bob: Man, a spectacular move by Lightning McQueen. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Fans: McQueen (7X) Fan: Yeah McQueen! Ka-chow! Bob: While everyone else heads into the pits, McQueen stays out to take the lead! Broken car: Don't take me out coach. I can still race! Chick: Haha. What do you think boys? A thing of beauty. Chick's coach: McQueen made it through! Chick: What? Chick's coach: He's not pitting! Chick: Come on! Get me out there! Let's go! Get me back out there! Come on! Bob: McQueen's not going into the pits! Darrell: You know the rookie just fired his crew chief. That's the third one this season! Bob: Well he says he likes working alone Darrell. Chick's coach: Go, go, go! Bob: Looks like Chick got caught up in the pits. Darrell: Yeah, after a stop like that, he's got a lot of ground to make up.Get ready boys, we're coming to the restart! Chick: Come on, come on, come on! McQueen's crew: We need tires now! Come on, let's go! McQueen: No,no,no,no! No tires, just gas! McQueen's crew: What! You need tires, you idiot! Darrell: Looks like it's all gas-and-go's for McQueen today. Bob: That's right. No tires again. Darrell: Normally I said a short-term gain, long-term loss, but it's sure is workin' for him. He obviously knows somethin' we don't know. Bob: This is it Darrell, one lap to go and Lightning McQueen has a huge lead. Darrell: All he's got it in the bag. Call in the dogs and put out the fire! We're gonna crown us a new champion! McQueen: Checkered flag, here I come! Darrell: Oh, no! McQueen has blown a tire! Bob: And with only one turn to go! Can he make it? McQueen's crew: You fool! The King's Coach: McQueen's blown a tire!, McQueen's blown a tire! Go,go,go! Darrell: He lost another tire! The King and Chick are coming up fast! Bob: They're entering turn three! McQueen: Come on. Darrell: I don't belive what I'm watching, Bob! Darrell: Lightning McQueen is hundred feet from his Piston Cup! Bob: The King and Chick rounding turn four. Darrell: Down the stretch they come! And it's, and it's... Bob: It's too close to call! Too close to call! Darrell: I don't belive it! (2X) Mia & Tia: Lightning! Bob: The most spectacular, amazing unequivocally, unbelievable ending in the history of the world! And we don't even know who won! Darrell: Look at that! Security: Hey, no cameras! Get outta here! Kori Turbowitz: We're here in Victory Lane, awaiting the race results. McQueen that was quite a risky move, not taking tires. McQueen crew: Tell me about it. Kori Turbowitz: Are you sorry you don't have a crew chief out there? McQueen's Crew: Hah! McQueen: Oh Kori. There's a lot more to racing than just winning. I mean, taking the race by a full lap... Where's the entertainment in that? No no no... I wanted to give folks a little sizzle. McQueen's crew: Sizzle? McQueen: Am I sorry I don't have a crew chief? No, I'm not. Cause I'm a one-man show. McQueen crew: Whats? Oh, yeah right. Kori Turbowitz: That was a very confident Lightning McQueen. Coming to you live from Victory Lane, I'm Kori Turbowitz. Cameramen: Hey, get out of the shot! McQueen: Yo, Chuck, what are you doing? You're blocking the camera. Everyone wants to see the bolt. McQuenn crew: What? McQueen: Now, back away. McQueen's crew: Ahh! That's it. Come on guys. McQueen: Whoa, team! Where are going? McQueen's crew: We quit, Mr. One-Man Show! McQueen: Oh, OK, leave. Fine. Hahaha. How will I ever find anyone else who knows how to fill me up with gas? Adios Chuck! McQueen's crew: And my name is not Chuck! McQueen: Oh, whatever. Chuck: Hey, Lightning! Yo! McQueen! Seriously, that was some pretty darn nice racin' out there. By me! Hahaha! Chick's crew: Zinger Chick: Welcome to the Chick era, baby! The Piston Cup... It's mine dude. It's mine. Hey fellas, how do you think I'm look in Dinoco blue? Dinoco blue! Hahaha! McQueen: In your dreams Thunder. Chick: Yeah, right. Thunder? What's he talkin' about, "Thunder"? McQueen: You know, cause' thunder always comes after lightning. Pew, Kaka-phow! Chick: Who here knew about the thunder thing? Chick's crew: I didn't. Cameramen: Give us the bolt! Cameramen: That's right. Cameramen: Right in the lens. Cameramen: Show me the bolt, baby! Cameramen: Smile, McQueen! Cameramen: Show me the bolt, McQueen! Cameramen: That's it! Tex: Ohh we, that was one close finish. You sure made Dinoco proud. Thank you, King. The King: Well, Tex, you've been good to me all these years. It's the least I could do. Dear: Whatever happens, you're winner to me, you old daddy rabbit. The King: Thanks, dear. We wouldn't be nothing without you. Mia: I'm Mia. Tia: I'm Tia. Mia & Tia: We're like your biggest fans! Ka-chow! McQueen: I love being me. Security: OK, girls, that's it. Mia & Tia: We love you, Lightning! Some guys far away: We love you more!! The King: Hey, buddy. You're one gutsy racer. McQueen: Oh, hey, Mr. The King. The King: You got more talent in one lug nut than a lot of cars has got in their whole body. McQueen: Really? Oh, that... The King: But you're stupid. McQueen: Excuse me? The King: This ain't a one-man deal, kid. You need to wise-up and get you self a good crew chief and a good team. And you ain't gonna win unless you got good folks behind you, and you let them do their job, like they should. Like I tell the boys at the shop... McQueen: A good team. Yeahhh. Dreaming Song. Mia & Tia: Oh, McQueen. The King: If you figure that out, you just gonna be OK. McQueen: Oh, yeah, that.. That is spectacular advice. Thank you Mr. The King. Speaker: Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time in Piston Cup history... McQueen: A rookie has won the Piston Cup. Yes!! Speaker: We have a three-way tie. Chick: Oh, ho. Hey, McQueen, that must be really embarrassing. But I wouldn't be worry about it. Because I didn't do it! Hahaha! Speaker: Piston Cup officials have determined that a tiebreaker race between the three leaders will be held in California in one week. Chick: Well, thank you! Thanks to all of you out there! Thank you! Hey, rook, first one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ahh! No, not me! No, you rock, and you know that! Balloon: Oh, yeah! Woaah!! McQueen: First one to California gets Dinoco all to himself. Ohh, we'll see who gets there first, Chick. Huh? Mack: Hey, kid! Congrats on the tie. McQueen: I don't want to talk about it. Come on, let's go, Mack. Saddle up. What'd you do with my trailer? Mack: I parked it at your sponsor's tent. McQueen: What? Mack: You gotta make your personal appearance. McQueen: No. No! No,no,no,no! McQueen: Yes, yes, yes! Lightning McQueen here. And I use Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment, new rear end formula! Nothing soothes rusty bumper like Rust-eze. McQueen: Wow! Look at that shine! Use Rust-eze and you too can look like me! Ka-chow! Rust-eze Car: Hahaha. I met this car from Swampscott. He was so rusty he didn't even cast a shadow. Rust-eze Van: You could see his dirty undercarriage. Hahaha. McQueen: Uahh! I hate rusty cars. This is not good for my image. Mack: They did give you your big break. Besides, it's in your contract. McQueen: Oh, will you stop please? Just go get hooked up. Rust-eze Van: Winter is a grand old time. Rust-eze Car: Of this there are no ifs or buts. Rust-eze Van: But remember, all that salt and grime... Rust-eze Car: Can rust your bolts and freeze your... Rust-eze Van: Hey look! There he is! Our almost champ! Victory ran to your rear end in here, kid. Fan: Lightning McQueen, you are wicked fast! Fan: That race was a pisser! Fan: You were booking McQueen! McQueen: Give me a little room guys. Fred: You're my hero Mr.McQueen. McQueen: Yes, I know. Fred, Fred, thank you. Fred: He knows my name. He knows my name! Rust-eze Van: Looking good, Freddie! Rust-eze Car: Thanks to you Lightning, we had a banner year! Rust-eze Van: We might clear enough to buy you some headlights. Rust-eze Car: Are you saying he doesn't have headlights? Rust-eze Van: That's what I'm telling ya. It's just stickers! McQueen: Well, you know, racecars don't need headlights, because the track is always lit. Rust-eze Car: Yeah, well,so is my brother, but he still needs headlights. Hahaha McQueen: Hahaha! Ha!! Hahaha!! Rust-eze Car: Ladies and gentlemen, Lightning McQueen! Fans: Free Bird! McQueen: You know, the Rust-eze Medicated Bumper Ointment team ran a great race today. And remember, with a little Rust-eze...And an insane amount of luck, you too can look like me. Ka-chow. Rust-eze Car: Hey, kid. Rust-eze Van: We love ya. And we're looking forward to another great year. Just like this year. Hahaha. McQueen: Not on your life. Rust-eze Car: Don't drive like my brother! Rust-eze Van: Oh Yeah, don't drive like my brother! Mack: California, here we come! McQueen: Dinoco, here we come! Song McQueen: I needed this. Hello? Harv: Is this Lightning McQueen, the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is this Harv, the world's greatest agent? Harv: And it is such a honor to be your agent and it almost hurts to take ten percent of your winnings and merchandising. And ancillary rights in perpetuity. Anyway, what a race! Hot champ! I didn't see it, but I heard you were great. McQueen: Thanks, Harv. Harv: Listen, they're giving you 20 tickets for the tiebreaker thing in Cali. I'll pass 'em on to your friends. You shoot me the names. You let Harv rock it for you. All right, baby? McQueen: Right. Friends. Yes, there's a... Harv: OK, I get it, Mr.Popular. So many friends you can't even narrow it down. Hey, when you get to town, you better make time for your best friend! You gotta break bread with your mishpoacheh here! McQueen: Yeah, yeah, that'd be great! We should totally... Harv: Ok, I gotta jump, kid. Let me know how it goes. I'm out. McQueen: What? A minivan? Oh, come on Mack, you're in the slow lane. This is Lightning McQueen you're hauling here Mack: Just stopping off for a quick breather, kid. Old Mack needs a rest. McQueen: Absolutely not. McQueen: We're driving straight to all night till we get to California. We agreed to it. Mack: All night? May I remind you, federal DOT regs state... McQueen: Come on, I need to get there before Chick get hang with Dinoco. Mack: Ahh, all those sleeping trucks. Hey kid, I don't know if I can make it. McQueen: Oh, sure you can, Mack. Look, it'll be easy. I'll stay up with you. Mack: All night? McQueen: All night long. McQueen: Zzzzz... DJ Song Snot Rod: Ah, ahh, achowww! Wingo: Hahaha! Boost: Hey, yo, DJ. DJ: What up? Boost: We got ourselves a nodder. DJ: Hahaha. Mack: Pretty music. Boost: Yo, Wingo! Lane change, man. Wingo: Right back at ya! Hahaha. Snot Rod: Yeah! Boost: Oops! I missed. Snot Rod: You going on vacation? Tuner team: Hahaha. Boost: Oh, no, Snot Rod... Wingo: He's gonna blow! Snot Rod: Ahh...ahhh...ahhh...achoowww!!! Mack: Gesundheit! Hoho. One should never drive while drowsy. McQueen: MACK! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Hey,Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack,wait for me! McQueen: Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: Mack! Mack... McQueen:...wait up! Mack. McQueen: Mack! Mack! McQueen: What?You're not Mack. Peterbilt: Mack?I ain't no Mack!I'm a Peterbilt, for dang sake! Peterbilt: Turn on your lights, you moron! McQueen: Mack... The Interstate! Sheriff: Ahh!. Not in my town, you don't. McQueen: Oh, no...Oh, maybe he can help me! He's shooting at me! Why is he shooting at me! Sheriff: I haven't gone this fast in years. I'm gonna blow a gasket or somethin'. McQueen: Serpentine! Serpentine, serpentine! Sheriff: What in the blue blazes? Crazy hot rodder. Filmore: I'm telling you, man, every third blink is slower. Sarge: The sixties weren't good for you, were they? McQueen: What? That's not the Interstate! Ahh ho, Auw, auw,auw! Ahhhh! No, no, no, no! Filmore: I'm not the only seeing this, right? Sarge: Incoming! Filmore: Whoa man. Sarge: No! Ramone: Hey, you scratch my paint! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Luigi: My tires! McQueen: Phoah! Red: Huh! McQueen: Uargh! Red: Huh! Filmore: Fly away, Stanley. Be free! Sheriff: Boy, you're in a heap of trouble. Kori Turbowitz: We're live at the Los Angeles International Speedway as the first competitor, Lightning McQueen, is arriving at the track. Cameramen: Is it true he's gonna pose for Cargirl? Cameramen: Lightning, what's your strategy? Woahh! Mack: What? Did I forget to wipe my mud flaps? News: McQueen's driver arrived in California, but McQueen was missing. News: Racecar Lightning McQueen was reported missing. News: He scheduled to race an unprecedented... News: Sponsor stated they have no idea where he is. Junior: I hope Lightning's OK. I sure hate to see anything bad happen to him. Jay Limo: I don't know what's harder to find, Lightning McQueen or a crew chief who'll work for him! Hummer: Lightning McQueen must be found at all costs! News: They're all asking the same question: Where is McQueen? McQueen: Oh, boy. Where am I? Mater: Mornin', sleepin' beauty! McQueen: Ahhhhh!! Mater: Hahaha! Boy, I was wonderin' when you was gonna wake up. McQueen: Take whatever you want! Just don't hurt me! a parking boot? Why do I have a parking boot on? What's going on here? Please! Mater: You're funny. I like you already. My name's Mater. McQueen: Mater. Mater: Yeah, like "tuh-mater", but without the "tuh". What's your name? McQueen: You don't know my name? Mater: Uhh, no, I know your name. Is your name Mater too? McQueen: What? Look, I need to get to California as fast as possible. Where am I? Mater: Where are you? Shoot! You're in Radiator Springs. The cutest little town in Carburetor County. McQueen: Oh, great. Just great! Mater: Well, if you think that's great, you should see the rest of the town. McQueen: You know, I'd love to see the rest of the town! So if you could just open the gate, take this boot off, you and me, we go cruisin', check out the local scene... Mater: Dad-gum! McQueen: How'd that be, Tuh-Mater? Mater: Cool Sheriff: Mater! What did I tell you about talkin' to the accused? Mater: To not to. Sheriff: Well, quit yer yappin' and tow this delinquent road hazard to traffic court. Mater: Well, we'll talk later, Mater. Haha. "Later, Mater." That's funny! Sheriff: The Radiator Springs Traffic Court will come to order! Ramone: Hey, you scratched my paint! I ought take a blowtorch to you, man! Luigi: You broke-a the road! You a very bad car! Fillmore: Fascist! Commie! McQueen: Officer, talk to me, babe. How long is this gonna take? I gotta get to California, pronto. Sheriff: Where's your lawyer? McQueen: Tuh, I don't know. Tahiti maybe. He's got a timeshare there. Sheriff: When a defendant has no lawyer, the court will assign one to him. Hey! Anyone want to be his lawyer? Mater: Shoot, I'll do it, Sheriff! Sheriff: All rise! The Honorable Doc Hudson presiding. Luigi: Show-off. Sheriff: May Doc have mercy on your soul. Doc Hudson: All right, I wanna know who's responsible for wreckin' my town, Sheriff. I wanna his hood on a platter! I'm gonna put him in jail till he rots! No, check that. I'm gonna put him in jail till the jail rots on top of him, and then I'm gonna move him to a new jail and let that jail rot. I'm... Throw him out of here, Sheriff. I want him out of my courtroom. I want him out of our town! Case dismissed. McQueen: Yes! Mater: Boy, I'm purty good at this lawyerin' stuff. Sally: Sorry I'm late, Your Honor! McQueen: Holy Porsche! She's gotta be from my attorney's office. Hey, thanks for comin', we're all set. He's letting me go. Sally: He's letting you go? McQueen: Yeah, your job's pretty easy today. All you have to do now is stand there and let me look at you. Listen, I'm gonna cut to the chase. Me, you, dinner. Ka-chow! Sally: What the...? Auww! Please! McQueen: I know, I get that reaction a lot. I create feelings in others that they themselves don't understand. Sally: Ohhh, auww! McQueen: Oh, I'm sorry. Did I scare you? Mater: Well, a little bit, but I'll be alright. Sally: OK. I'm gonna go talk to the judge. McQueen: Do what you gotta do, baby. Oh, but listen. Be careful. Folks around here are not firing on all cylinders, if you know what I mean. Mater: Ka-ching! Auww! Sally: I'll keep that in mind. Hey there, Mater. Mater: Howdy, Sally. Sally: Hi, folks! Folks: Good morning! Sally. McQueen: You know her? Mater: She's the town attorney and my fiancee. McQueen: What? Mater: Nah, I'm just kiddin'. She just like me for my body. Sally: Doc, you look great this morning. Did you do something different with your side view mirrors? Doc: What do you want, Sally? Sally: Ah, come on, make this guy fix the road. The town needs this. Doc: No. I know his type. Racecar. That's the last thing this town needs. Sally: OK, I didn't want to have to do this, Doc, but you leave me no choice. Fellow citizens, you're all aware of our town's proud history. Doc: Here she goes again. Sally: Radiator Springs, the glorious jewel strung on the necklage of Route 66, the mother road! It is our job and our pleasure to take care of the travelers on our stretch of that road. Sarge: Travelers? What travelers? Filmore: Ignore him. Sally: But how, I ask you, are we to care for those travelers if there is no road for them to drive on? Luigi, what do you have at your store? Luigi: Tires Sally: And if no one can get to you? Luigi: I won't sell any...tires. I will lose everything! Ohho. Sally: Flo, what do you have at your store? Flo: I have gas. Lotsa gas! Sally: OK boys, stay with me. And, and, Flo, what'll happen if no one can come to your station to buy gas? Flo: I'll go outta business and... we'll have to leave town. Sally: And what's gonna happen to all of us if Flo leaves town and closes her station? Folks: Without gas, we're done for! Lizzie: What? Sally: So, don't you think the car responsible should fix our road? Lizzie: The only guy strong enough to fix that road is Big Al! Ramone: Lizzie, the guy left, like, 15 years ago. Lizzie: Then why are you bringing him up, you lemon? Sally: Oh, he can do it. He's got the horsepower. So, what do you want him  to do? Folks: Fix the road! Sally: Because we are a town worth fixing! Folks: Yeah!!! Doc: Order in the court! Seems like my mind has been changed for me. Folks: Yeah!! McQueen: No! Filmore: Nice rulin'. McQueen: Ohh, I am so not take you to dinner. Sally: That's OK, Stickers. You can take Bessie. Mater: Oh man, you got to work with Bessie! I'd give my left two lug nuts for somethin' like that. McQueen: Bessie? Who's Bessie? Doc: This here is Bessie, finest road-pavin' machine ever built. I'm hereby sentencing you to community service. You're gonna fix the road under my supervision. McQueen: What? This place is crazy! Mater: Hey, I know this may be a bad time right now, but tha, you owe me $32,000 in legal fees. McQueen: What? Doc: So we're gonna hitch you up to sweet Bessie, and you're gonna pull her nice. McQueen: You're gotta be kidding me. Doc: You start there where the road begins, you finish down there where the road ends. Mater: Holy shoot! McQueen: Whoa, whoa, whoa! How long is this gonna take? Doc: Well, fella does it right, should take him about five days. McQueen: Five days? But I should be in California schmoozing Dinoco right now! Doc: Then if I were you, I'd quit yappin and start workin'! Hook him up, Mater. Mater: Okay-dokey. McQueen: Freedom!! Mater: Maybe I should've-a hooked him up to Bessie...and then-a...then took the boot off. McQueen: Wuuuhuuu! Goodbye, Radiator Springs, and goodbye, Bessie! California, here I come! Yeah! Oh, fell that wind. Yes! No,no,no,no! Outta gas? How can I be outta gas? Sheriff: Hahaha. Boy, we ain't as dumb as you think we are. McQueen: But,but,but how did, how did...you...? Sally: We siphoned your gas while you were passed out. Ka-chow. McQueen: Auw,auw,auw,auw,auwww!! Sheriff: Hahaha. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Sarge: Sheriff. Filmore: Hai, Sheriff. Luigi: Why the tires are here? Guido: Sono sempre stati qui. Luigi: They were better well before. Guido: Stai sempre a parlare. Luigi: Guido! Lizzie: Red, can you move over? I want to get look at that sexy hot rod. Mater: You know, I used to be a purty good whistler. I can't do it now of course, on account of sometimes I get fluid built up in my engine block, but Doc said he's gonna fix it dough. He can fix about anything. That's why we made him the judge. Boy, you shoulda heard me on Giddy-up, Oom Papa Mow Mow. Now, I'm not one to brag, but people come purty far to see me get low on the "Mow-Mow". McQueen: Ah? Ah, man, that's just great! Mater: Hey, what's wrong? McQueen: My lucky sticker's all dirty. Mater: Thaah, that ain't nothin'. I'll clean it for ya. McQueen: No,no,no! That wouldn't be necessary. Hey! Hey, big fella! Yeah, you in the red! I could use a little hose down. Help me wash this off. What, where's he goin'? Mater: Oh, he's still a little bit shy, and he hates you for killin' his flowers. McQueen: I shouldn't have to put up with this. I'm a precision instrument of speed and aerodynamics. Mater: You hurt your what? McQueen: I'm a very famous racecar! Luigi: You are a famous racecar? A real racecar? McQueen: Yes, I'm a real racecar. What do you think? Look at me. Luigi: I have followed racing my entire life of my whole life! McQueen: Then you know who I am. I'm Lightning McQueen. Luigi: Lightening McQueen! McQueen: Yes! Yes! Luigi: I must scream it to the world! My excitement from the top of someplace very high! Do you know many Ferraris? McQueen: No,no,no. They race on the European circuit. I'm in the Piston Cup! What? Luigi: Luigi follow only the Ferraris. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Customers. Customers! Customers, everyone! Customers! OK. Lizzie: Customers? Sally: All right, everybody calm down for a long time. Just remember what we rehearsed. Make sure your "Open, please come in" signs are out. And you all know what to do. All right, nobody panics. Here we go! Minny: Van, I just don't see any on-ramp anywhere. Van: Minny, I know exactly where we are. Minny: Yeah, we're in the middle of nowhere. Van: Honey, please. Sally: Hello. Welcome to Radiator Springs, gateway to  Ornament Valley. Legendary for it's quality service and friendly hospitality. How can we help you? Van: We don't need anything, thank you very much. Minny: Whoa, honey ask her direction to the Interstate. Van: There's no need to ask for directions. Minny, I know exactly where we're going. Minny: He did the same thing on our trip to Shakopee. You know, we were headed over there for the Crazy Days, and we... Van: OK,OK. Really. We're just peachy, OK? Filmore: What you really need is the sweet taste of my homemade, organic fuel. Van: No, it doesn't agree with my tank. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Sarge: Good to see you, Soldier! Come on by Sarge's Surplus Hut for all your government surplus needs. Minny: Ohh, honey, surplus! Van: I think we have too much surplus. Sally: I do have a map over the Cozy Cone Motel. And if you do stay, we offer a free Lincoln Continental breakfast. Minny: Honey, she's got a map. Van: I don't need a map! I have the GPS. Never need a map again, thank you. Flo: How 'bout somethin' to drink? Stop at Flo's V8 Cafe. Finest fuel on Route 66. Van: No, we just top off. Luigi: And if you need tires, stop by Luigi's Casa Della Tires, home of the Leaning Tower of Tires. Minny: We're just trying to find the Interstate. Ramone: But you do need a paint job man. Ramone will paint you up right. Hey, anything you want! You know, like a flame job. Minny: No, thanks... Ramone: Maybe ghost flames! You like old school pinstripin'? Von Dutch style ha? Minny: Oh, honey, look. Von Dutch. Van: Oh, ho, OK, no. Ahahaha. We're gonna be going now, OK? Auww! Lizzie: A little somethin' to remember us by, OK? Van: Oh,ha,ha. OK! Sally: Come back soon, OK? I mean, you know where we are! Tell your friends! Van: HohohOK! Yes. You bet. Minny: Thanks again, folks. Bye-bye now. McQueen: Psst! Psst! Hey! Hey, hey,hey! I know how to get to the Interstate! Minny: Oh, do ya? Van: Minny, no. McQueen: Yeah, yeah,yeah. No, not really. But listen. I'm Lightning McQueen, the famous racecar. I'm being held heren against my will. And I need you to call my team, so they can rescue me, and get me to California in time for me to win The Piston Cup. Do you understand? McQueen: No,no,no,no,no. No, It's the truth! I'm telling you! You gotta help me! Don't leave me here! I'm in hillbilly hell! My IQ's dropping by the second! I'm becoming one of them! Sally: OK, don't worry. They know where we are now. They're gonna tell their friends. You'll see. Radio: And we'll be back for our Hank Williams marathon... Sally: That's good. Radio:...after a Piston Cup update. Still no sign of Lightning McQueen. Meanwhile, Chick Hicks arrived in California and today became the first car to spend practice time on the track. Chick: Yeah, well it's just nice to get out here before the other competitors. You know, get a headstart. Gives me an edge. Dreaming Song Chick: Yeah. Chick: Hey, McQueen... Eat your heart out. McQueen: Mater, let me get this straight. I can go when this road is done. That's the deal, right? Mater: That's what they done did said. McQueen: OK. Outta my way. I got a road to finish. Mater: He's done! Doc: Done? Mater: Ahmhm. Doc: It's only been an hour. McQueen: I'm done. Look, I'm finished. Just say thank you, and I'll be on my way. That's all I gotta say. Mater: Weehoo! I'm the first one on the new road! Ahho! It rides purty smooth. Sally: It looks awful! McQueen: Well, it matches the rest of the town. Sally: Ahh. Red: Umph, huhuhuh. Sally: Red. Who do you think you are? McQueen: Look, Doc said when I finish, I could go. That was the deal. Doc: The deal was you fix the road, not making it worse. Now, scrape it off! Start over again. McQueen: Hey, look, grandpa, I'm not a bulldozer. I'm a racecar. Doc: Hohoho. Is that right? Then why don't we just have a little race? Me and you. Sally: What? McQueen: Hohoho. Me and you. Is that a joke? Doc: If you win, you go and I fix the road. If I win, you do the road my way. Sheriff: Doc, what're you doin'? McQueen: Hahaha. I don't mean to be rude here Doc, but you probably go zero to sixty in like what? Three-point-five years? Doc: Then I reckon you ain't got nothin' to worry about. McQueen: You know what old timer? That's a wonderful idea. Let's race. Sheriff: Gentlemen, this will be a one-lap race. You will drive to Willy's Butte, go around Willy's Butte and come back. There will be no bumpin', no cheatin', no spittin', no bittin', no road rage, no maimin', no oil slickin', no pushin', no shovin', no backstabbin', no road-hoggin' and no lollygaggin'. McQueen: Speed. I'm speed. Float like a Cadillac, sting like a Beemer. Luigi: OhHohohoo. My friend Guido, he dream to give a real racecar a pit stop. Guido: Pit stop. McQueen: Aa, haha. The race is only one lap, guys. Uno lappo! Don't need any help. I work solo mio. Luigi: Fine. Race your way. McQueen: No pit stoppo. Comprendo? Guido: OK. Sheriff: Gentlemen. Start your engines! Ramone: Hijole! Check that out! Filmore: Whoa. Flo: Emm, emm. Sally: Great idea, Doc. Now the road will never get done. Sheriff: Luigi. Luigi: Hohoho. On your mark, get set. Uno for the money, due for the show, tre to get ready, and quattro to... I can't belive it. Go!! Hahaha. Doc: Yehaa! Hahaha! Sally: Yeah. Luigi: Huh? Doc, the flag means go. Remember the flag. Here we go. Go. Ramone: Uhh, Doc, what are you doing, man? Doc: Oh, dear. It would seem I'm off to a poor start. Well, better late than never. Come on, Mater. Might need a little help. Mater: Ahh, OK. Doc: You got your tow cable? Mater: Well, yeah. I always got my tow cable. Why? Doc: Ohh, just in case. McQueen: Ahh,auw,auw,auw,no,no,no,no,no! Ramone: Oh, man! Auww!! Filmore: Whoa. Bad trip, man. Doc: Hey! Was that floatin' like a Cadillac, or was that stingin' like a Beemer? I'm confused. Mater: Eh,eh,eh. Doc: You drive like you fix roads. Lousy! Have fun fishin', Mater McQueen: Ahhh! Mater: I'm startin' to think he knowed you was gonna crash! McQueen: Thank you, Mater. Thank you. McQueen: I can make a little turn on dirt. You think? No. And now I'm a day behind. I'm never gonna get outta here! Ramone: Hey, ese! You need a new paint job, man! McQueen: No, thank you. Filmore: How 'bout some organic fuel? Sarge: That freak juice? McQueen: Pass. Flo: Whooh, watchin' him workin' is makin' me thirsty. Anybody else want somethin' to drink? Mater: Nah, not me, Flo. I'm on one of them there special diets. I'm a precisional instrument of speed and aero-matics. McQueen: "You race like you fix roads." I'll show him. I will show him! McQueen: Great! I hate it! Hate, hate, hate, hate it!! Doc: Haha. Music. Sweet music. Sally: Maybe this wasn't such a good idea. McQueen: Radiator Springs, a happy place. Bessie: Peckkk. McQueen: Whoa, OK, Bessie you think that funny? Great! I'm talking to Bessie now! I'm talkin to Bessie!! Mater: Hahaha. Sally: Wow. Mater: Mornin', Sally! Hey, look at this here fancy new road that Lightnin' McQueen done just made! Sally: Yes! Amazing! Ramone: Yeah! Flo: Ohh, Ramone, Mama ain't seen you that low in years. Ramone: I haven't seen a road like this in years. Flo: Well, then let's cruise, baby. Ramone: Low and slow. Luigi: E Bellissima! It's beautiful! Guido, look, it's a like it was paved by angels. Ohhh. Mater: Oh, I tell you what. I bet even the roads on the moon ain't this smooth. Sally: Doc, look at this. Shoulda tossed him into the cactus a lot sooner, huh? Doc: Well, he ain't finished yet. Still got a long way to go. Luigi: Guido, look at Luigi! Hahaha. This is fantastico! Sally: That looks like fun! Mater, I got dibs, next turn! Lizzie: Hey, Luigi, this new road makes your place look like a dump. Luigi: Ahhh, that crazy old devil woman. Ohh, ohh. She's right! Sally: Ohh, ahh! Luigi: Guido! Doc: That punk actually did a good jab. Well, now... where the hack is he? Doc: Sheriff! Is he makin' another run for it? Sheriff: No,no. He ran outta asphalt in the middle of the night, asked me if he could come down here. All he's tryin' to do is make that there turn. McQueen: No,no,no,no! Ohh, great. Perfect turns on every track I've ever raced on. Doc: Sheriff, why don't you go get yourself a quart of oil at Flo's. Doc: I'll keep an eye on him. Sheriff: Well, thanks, Doc. I've been feelin' a quart low. McQueen: Ahhhhh! Phuahh, thahh! Doc: This ain't asphalt, son. This is dirt. McQueen: Oh, great. What do you want? You hear to gloat? Doc: You don't have three-wheel brakes, so you got to pitch it hard, break it loose and then just drive it with the throttle. Give it too much, you'll be outta the dirt and into the tulips. McQueen: So you're a judge, a doctor and a racing expert. Doc: I'll put it simple. If you goin' hard enough left, you'll find yourself turnin' right. McQueen: Ooo, right. That makes perfect sense. Turn right to go left. Yes! Thank you! Or should I say,"No thank you"? Because in Opposite World, maybe that really means, "Thank you"! Tuh, crazy grandpa car. What an idiot! Doc: Ahhh. McQueen: Turn right to go left. Oh. Whoa, auwwww. Oh, that... AUUUUUWWWWWW!!! McQueen: Turn right to go left. Guess what. I tried it. You know what? This crazy thing happened... I went right! Lizzie: You keep talkin' to yourself, people'll think you crazy. McQueen: Thanks for the tip. Lizzie: What? I wasn't talkin' to you. Sally: Oh, Guido, e bellissimo! Guido: Che cosa? Sally: It looks great! This is great! Guido: Ti piace, eh? Si, si, bellissimo. Mater: Ummmph. Oh, lord. Hehehe. Sheriff: Mater! I need you to watch the prisoner tonight. Mater: Well, dad-gum! Wait a minute, what if he tries to run again? Sheriff: Just let him run outta gas and tow him on back. But keep an eye on him. Mater: Yes, sir! McQueen: While I'm stuck here paving this stinkin' road, Chick's in California schmoozing Dinoco. My Dinoco. Whoa, whoa, whoa! Who's touching me? Luigi: You have a slow leak. Guido, he fix. You make a such a nice new road. You come to my shop. Luigi take a good care of you. Eventhough you not a Ferrari. You buy four tires, I give you a full size spare absolutely free! McQueen: Look, I get all my tires for free. Luigi: Hohoho.. I like your style, eh? You drive the hard bargain. OK. Luigi make you a new deal. You buy one tire, I give you three for free! Flo: Aaa... Would you look at that? Ramone, Ramone! Ramone: Hm,hm,hm. Luigi: Then Luigi make you a new deal McQueen: No,no,no,no. Deal me out. Pass. No, thank you. Luigi: No,no,no,no,no. This is it. My last offer. You buy one tire, I give you seven-a snow tire for all free! Done. You interested, you call me. You know where I am. McQueen: Fuuuhhh. Ahhhh. Stop! Let me...Tuhh, puahh!! sally: Oh, Red, you missed a spot. See it right there? On the hood right there. McQueen: No, no! Noooo!! Stop, stop! That cold!! Help! Please! Stop! Sally: Thanks, Red. McQueen: What was that for? Sally: Do you want to stay at the Cozy Cone or what? McQueen: Huh? Sally: And if you do, you gotta be clean. 'Cause even here in hillibilly hell we have standards. McQueen: What,I...? I don't get it. Sally: Nothing I just thought I'd say thank you for doin' a great job. So I thought I'd let you stay with me. I mean, not with me! But there. Not with me there, but there in your own Cozy Cone. And I'd be in my cone, and it's... McQueen: Wait. Wait, you're being nice to me. Sally: I mean if you want to stay at the dirty impound, thats, thats fine. You know, I understand you criminal types. McQueen: No,no,no,no. That's OK. Yeah, the Cozy Cone. Sally: Ehhh. It's newly refurbished McQueen: Haha. Yeah, it's like a clever little twist the motel's made out of caution cones, which, of course, cars usually try to avoid, now we're gonna stay in them. Haha. That's funny. Sally: Figure that all out on your own, did you? Cone number one, if you want. McQueen: Auuhhh. McQueen: Hey, do I spy a little pinstriping tattoo back there? Sally: Auuww. Haha. That's just a... Ahhahaha. Auuww. You saw that? Yeah! Just gonna be going. Gonna...Yeah. Mater: You know, I once knew this girl Doreen. Good-lookin' girl. Looked just like a Jaguar, only she was a truck! You know, I used to crash into her, just so I could spoke to her. McQueen: What are you talking about? Mater: I don't know. Hey, I know somethin' we can do tonight, 'cause I'm in charge of watchin' you! McQueen: No, Mater, I gotta finish this road, and I have to get out of here. Mater: Well, that's all right, Mr. I Can't Turn On Dirt. You probably couldn't handle it anyway. McQueen: Whoa, whoa, easy now, Mater. You know who you're talkin' to? This is Lightning McQueen. I can handle anything. McQueen: Mater, I'm not doin' this. Mater: Oh, come on, you'll love it. Hehehe. Tractor-tippin's fun. McQueen: This is ridiculous. Mater: All right, listen. When I say go, we go. But don't let Frank catch ya. Go! McQueen: Whoa! Wait! Who, who's Frank? Mater. Wait, Mater! Mater: OK, here's what you do. You just sneak up in front of 'em, and then honk. And they do the rest. Watch this. Mater: Hahahaha. I swear, tractors is so dumb! I tell you what, buddy, you don't get much better than this. McQueen: Yep, you're livin' the dream, Mater boy. Mater: I don't care who you are, that's funny right there. Oh, you turn, bud. McQueen: Mater, I can't. I don't even have a horn. Mater: Baby. McQueen: I'm not a baby. Mater: Puuuck, puck, puck. McQueen: Fine. Stop! stop, OK? All right. I'll do something. Mater & McQueen: Hahahahaha!!! Mater: That's Frank. McQueen: Ahhhh!! Mater: Run, hahaha , run!!! Mater: Run! He's gonna get ya! Hahaha!! Sally: Customers! Mater: Tomorrow night we can go look for the ghostlight! McQueen: I can't wait, Mater. Mater: Oh, yeah, I'm tellin' ya! Oh, boy, you gotta admit that was funnn unn! McQueen: Oh, yeah...yeah. Mater: Well, we better get you back to the impound lot. McQueen: You know, actually, Sally's gonna let me stay at the motel. Mater: Aaaa... Gettin' cozy at the Cone, is we? McQueen: Oh, come...No. No, are you kidding? Besides, she can't stand me. And I don't like her, to be honest. Mater: Yeah, you probably right. Hey, look, there's Miss Sally! McQueen: Where, where? Mater: Hahaha. You're in love with Miss Sally. McQueen: No, I'm not. Mater: Yes, you do. McQueen: No way. Mater: Way. McQueen: Come on, look Mater: You're in love with Miss Sally(2X) McQueen: OK, that's real mature Mater, real grown up. Mater: You love her (7X) McQueen: Wait...All right. OK. Mater, Mater, Mater, no. Will you stop that? Mater: Stop what? McQueen: That's driving backwards stuff. It's creeping me out. You're gonna wreck on somethin'. Mater: Wreck? Shoot! I'm the world's best backwards driver! You just watch this right here, lover boy. McQueen: What are you doing? Watch out! Look out! Mater? Mater! Mater! McQueen: Hey take it easy, Mater! Mater: Waaaaaaa! Ha,ha,ha! Hee,hee. McQueen: Hahaha. He's nuts. Mater: No need to watch where I'm goin'. Just need to know where I've been. McQueen: Whoa, that was incredible! How'd you do that? Mater: Rearview mirrors. We'll get you some, and I'll teach you if you want. McQueen: Yeah, maybe I'll use it in my big race. Mater: What's so important about this race of yours, anyway? McQueen: It's not just a race. We're talking about the Piston Cup! I've been dreaming about it my whole life! I'll be the first rookie in history ever to win it. And when I do, we're talkin' big new sponsor, with private helicopters. No more medicated bumper ointment. No more rusty old cars. Mater: What's wrong with rusty old cars? McQueen: Well, I don't mean you, Mater. I mean other old cars. You know? Not like you. I like you. Mater: Nahhh, it's OK, buddy. Hey, you think maybe one day I can get a ride in one of them helicopters? I mean, I've always wanted to ride in one of them fancy helicopters. McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah, sure, sure. Mater: You mean it? McQueen: Oh, yeah. Anything you say. Mater: I knew it. I knowed I made a good choice! McQueen: In what? Mater: My best friend. Mater: See you tomorrow, buddy! McQueen and Sally parked beneath a tree, K-I-S somethin'-somethin'-somethin'-t!! McQueen: Hahaha! Whoa, whoa. Haha. McQueen: Number one. Number one...Ahhh...Number one! McQueen: Ahh, this is nice. Sally: Hey, Stickers. McQueen & Sally: Huh!! Sally: I'm sorry. McQueen: Wohho!! You scared me. You gotta be careful. Sally: I scared myself scaring you scaring me. McQueen: I mean, I wasn't like "scared" scared. Sally: No, of course not. Not. McQueen: I was more... Sally: Just I overheard you talkin' to Mater. McQueen: When? Just, just now? What, what did, what did you hear? Sally: Oh, just something about a helicopter ride. McQueen: Oh, yeah. Yeah, he got a kick out of that, didn't he? Sally: Did you mean it? McQueen: What? Sally: That you'll get him a ride. McQueen: Oh, who knows? I mean first things first. I gotta get outta here and make the race. Sally: Ah, hah. You know...Mater trusts you. McQueen: Yeah, OK. Sally: Did you mean that? McQueen: What? Sally: Was it just a "Yeah, OK", or "Yeah...OK" or"Yea-yeah, OK" McQueen: Look, I'm exhausted. It's kinda been a long day. Sally: Yeah, OK. G'night. McQueen: Oh ah. Hey, thank you. Sally: What did you just say? McQueen: You know, thanks for lettin' me stay here. It's nice to be out of the impund, and this is... It's great. Newly refurbished, right? Sally: Yeah. McQueen: Good night. Sally: Good night. Sally: Huhh. Sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. It's Hendrix! McQueen: Ahh...huh...please...huh... Dreaming Song McQueen: No!! Frank: Uarghhh!! McQueen: Noooo!!! I gotta get outta here! McQueen: Hey, have you seen the Sheriff? Oh! Oh, my gosh. Oh! Doc: Hey, what are you doin'? Sheriff: Get a good peak, city boy? McQueen: I,a..a..I just need my daily gas ration from the Sheriff. Doc: Wait for him at Flo's. Now get outta here. McQueen: I've been trying to get outta here for three days! Sheriff: Hope you enjoyed the show! McQueen: Whoaho, Doc. Time to clean out the garage, buddy, come on. McQueen: What? He has a Piston Cup? McQueen: Oh, my gosh. Three Piston Cup? Doc: Sign says stay out. McQueen: You, you have three Piston Cups. How could you have... Doc: I knew you couldn't drive. I didn't know you couldn't read. McQueen: You're the Hudson Hornet! Doc: Wait over at Flo's, like I told ya! McQueen: Of course. I can't belive I didn't see it before. You're The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! You still to hold the record for most wins in single season. Oh, we gotta talk. You gotta show me your tricks. Please. Doc: I already tried that. McQueen: And you won the championship three times! Look at those trophies! Doc: You look. All I see is a bunch of empty cups. Filmore: You know, some automotive yoga could really lower your RPM's, man. Sarge: Oh, take a car wash, hippie. Flo: Yeah, look at my husband, y'all. Hooo...That's your color! Ramone: Yellow, baby. Hahaha. Flo: Mmm! You smokin' hot! Sheriff: There he is! McQueen: Oh, my gosh! Did you know Doc is a famous racecar? Folks: Hahahaha! Sheriff: Doc? Our Doc? Sarge: Not Doc Hudson. McQueen: No,no,no,no, it's true! He's a real racing legend. He's The Fabulous Hudson Hornet! Flo: Fabulous? I never seen Doc drive more than 20 miles an hour. I mean, have you ever seen him race? McQueen: No, but I wish I could have of. They say he was amazing! He wins three Piston Cups. Mater: Phooah!! He did what in his cup? Sheriff: I think the heat's startin' to get to the boy! Lizzie: Well, I'll say! Look how red he is! Ramone: Yeah, I think he needs a new coat of poly, man. Mater: Are you sick, buddy? Sheriff: You are lookin' a little peaked. Ramone: Yeah, he needs a new coat of poly for sure! Sheriff: Hey, hey! What are you doin'? Sally: It's OK, Sheriff. You can trust me, right? Sheriff: I trust you, all right. It's him I'm worried about. Sally: Mmm... I trust him. Come on, let's take a drive. McQueen: A drive? Sally: Yeah, a drive. Don't you big city racecars ever just take a drive? McQueen: Ahhh...No. No, we don't. Sally: Hey, Stickers! Do you comin' or what? Flo: Ahmm. And you thought he was gonna run. Ramone: Hey, can you believe it, man? He actually thought Doc was a famous racecar! Hahaha... That's so too much!! McQueen: OK, you got me out here. Where are we goin'? Sally: I don't know. McQueen: Whoa! Yes. Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Whoa! Hahaha. Uahh!! Sally: Hahaha. McQueen: Thahhh! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! Sally: Ah.. hahaha! McQueen: Hahaha! Thuhhh!!Thuhh!! McQueen: Wow! What is this place? Sally: Wheel Well. Used to be the most popular stop on the mother road. McQueen: This place? Sally: Yeah, imagine...Oh, imagine what it must have been like to stay here. McQueen: You know, I don't get you. How does a Porsche wind up in a place like this? Sally: Well, it's really pretty simple. I was...an attorney in LA livin' life in the fast lane, and. McQueen: Oh, you were, were you? Were you rich? Sally: What? McQueen: Just...clues to the puzzle. Sally: Yeah, OK. Well, that was my life. And you know what? It never felt...happy. McQueen: Yeah. I mean...really? Sally: Yeah. So I left California. Just drove and drove and finally broke down right here. Doc fixed me up, Flo took me in. Well, they all did. And I never left. McQueen: Yeah. You know, I understand. You need a little R & R. Recharge and old batteries. But you know, after a while, why didn't you go back? Sally: I fell in love. McQueen: Ohh. Sally: Yep. McQueen: Corvette? Sally: No. Sally: I fell in love with this. McQueen: Whoa. Look at that. Look, they're drivin' right by. They don't even know what they're missing! Sally: Well, it didn't used to be that way. McQueen: Oh, yeah? Sally: Yeah. Forty years ago, that Interstate down there didn't exist. McQueen: Really? sally: Yeah. Back then, cars came across the country a whole different way. McQueen: How do you mean? Sally: Well, the road didn't cut through land like that Interstate. It moved with the land, you know? It rose, it fell, it curved. Folk: Mornin'! Folk: Nice day, huh? Sally: Cars didn't drive on it to make a great time. They drove on it to have a great time. Song McQueen: Well, what happened? Sally: The town got bypassed just to save ten minutes of driving. Song McQueen: How great would it have been to see this place in its heyday! Sally: Ohh...I can't tell you how many times I've dreamed of that. But one of these days, we'll find a way to get it back on the map. McQueen: Yeah. Hey, listen, thanks for the drive. I had a great time. It's kinda nice to slow down every once in a while. Sally: You're welcome. Mater: Hey, listen, listen! If anybody asks you, we was out smashin' mailboxes, OK? McQueen: Wha... What? Ramone: Oh, man, the paint's still wet! Luigi: No,no,no,no! Get out of the store! Hey! Don't eat the radial! Here, take-a the snow tires. Sheriff: Mater! Mater: I wasn't tractor-tippin'! Sheriff: Then where did all these gol-durn tractors come from? Mater: Whoa, boy! Whoa! McQueen: Hahaha. Hey! Hey guys. There's one goin' this way. I got it. McQueen: Come here, little tractor, come here. Yeah, that's a good tractor. No,no,no,no, come here. What are you doing? You're not supposed to go wandering off all...alone. McQueen: What are you doin' with those old racin' tires? Doc: Huuhhh. McQueen: Come on, Doc, drive. Doc: Ahhhh. Yeah. McQueen: Wow! You're amazing! What are you doin'? Doc, wait! Mater: Giddup right in there! Come on, Rusty. Weee...heyy! McQueen: Doc, hold it! Seriously, your driving's incredible! Doc: Wonderful. Now, go away. McQueen: Hey, I mean it. You've still got it! Doc: I'm askin' you to leave. McQueen: Come on. I'm a racecar, you're... a much older racecar, but under the hood you and I are the same. Doc: We are not the same! Understand? Now, get out. McQueen: How could a car like you quit at the top of your game? Doc: You think I quit? McQueen: Right. Your big wreck in '54. Doc: They quit on me. When I finally got put together, I went back expecting a big welcome. You know what they said? "You're history". Moved right on to the next rookie standing in line. There was a lot left in me. I never got chance to show 'em. I keep that, to remind me never to go back. I just never expected that that world would...would find me here. McQueen: Hey, look, Doc, I'm not them. Doc: Oh, yeah? McQueen: No, I'm not. Doc: When is the last time you cared about something except yourself, hot rod? You name me one time. And I will take it all back. Ahhuh? I didn't think so. These are good folk around here, who care about one another. I don't want 'em depending on someone they can't count on. McQueen: Oh, like you? You've been here how long and your friends don't even know who you are? Who's caring about only himself? Doc: Just finish that road and get outta here! sarge: Will you turn that disrespectful junk off? Filmore: Respect the classics, man. Mater: He's done. He must've finished it while we was all sleepin'. Doc: Good riddance. Flo: He's gone? Sarge: Well, we wouldn't want him to miss that race of his. Sheriff: Hisk...hisk. Ramone: Oh, dude, are you crying? Sheriff: No! I'm happy! I don't have to watch him every second of the day anymore! I'm glad he's gone! Red: Hahaha. McQueen: What's wrong with Red? Mater: Oh, he's just sad 'cause you left town, and went to your big race to win the Piston Cup that you've always dreamed about your whole life and get that big ol' sponsor and that fancy helicopter you was talkin' about. Mater: Huuhh! Wait a minute! Folks: Hahaha. Mater: I knowed you wouldn't leave without saying goodbye. McQueen: Hahaha. Sheriff: What are you doin' here, son? You're gonna miss your race. Don't worry. I'll give you a police escort, and we'll make up the time. McQueen: Thank you, Sheriff. But you know I can't go just yet. Sheriff: Well, why not? McQueen: I'm not sure these tires...can get me all the way to California. Yeah, does anybody know what time Luigi's opens? Luigi: Ah..haha! I can't-a believe it! Luigi: Four new tires! Grazien, Mr. Lightning. Grazien! Flo: Would you look at that! Luigi: Our first real customers in years! I am filled with tears of ecstacy, for this is the most glorious day of my life! McQueen: All right, Luigi, give me the best set of blackwalls you've got. Luigi: No,no,no,no! You don't-a know what you want. Luigi know what you want. Blackwall tires. They blend into the pavement. But-a this...white-wall tires! They say, "Look at me! Here I am! Love me." McQueen: All right, you're the expert. Luigi: Eh, hehehee! McQueen: Oh, and don't forget the spare. Luigi: Perfetto. Guido! Guido: Peet stop! Song Luigi: Hahaha! What did Luigi tell you, aey? McQueen: Wow, you were right. Better than a Ferrari, huh? Luigi: Aaa, No. McQueen: Wow! This organic fuel is great! Why haven't I heard about it before? Filmore: It's a conspiracy, man! The oil companies got a grip on the government! They're feedin' us a bunch of lies, man. McQueen: OK, I'll take a case. Ramone: Ahh.. Yeah. Ka-chow. Mater: Here she comes! McQueen: Places, everybody. Hurry! Act natural. Folks: Hi, Sally. Sally: All right, what's goin' on? Mater: Ladies and gentlecars, please welcome the neeewww Lightning McQueen! McQueen: What do you think? Radiator Springs looks pretty good on me. Sally: I'll say. Rrr. Ka-chow. You're gonna fit right in in California. Oh my goodness. It looks like you've helped everybody in town. McQueen: Yeah, everybody except one. Hey, is it getting dark out? Lizzie: What? What'd he say? McQueen: Let me say that again. Is it getting dark out? Lizzie: Now, what was I supposed to do after that? Song Sally: They fixed their neon. Flo: Low and slow? Ramone: Oh, yeah, baby! McQueen: Just like in its heyday, right? Sally: It's even better than I pictured it. Thank you. McQueen: Shall we cruise? Lizzie: Oh, thank you, dear. I'd love to! McQueen: No,no,no. Sally: Lizzie! Lizzie: I remember when Stanley first asked me to take a drive with him. Mater: Hey, Miss sally. May I have this cruise? Sally: Of course, Mater. Sheriff: A,a,ah! Lizzie: ...and again and I said, "No," and he asked me again, and I said, "No." But, oh, he was a persistent little burger for a two-cylinder. Finally I said, "All right, one little drive." Mater: Hahaha. McQueen: Hey! Sally: Thanks, Mater. Mater: Good evenin', you two. Lizzie: Oh, Stanley, I wish you could see this. Flo: Is that what I think it is? Sally: Oh, I don't know, Flo. I haven't had a chance to find out. But I am going to find out. Hello. Flo: Not that. That. Sally: Huh. Customers? Flo: Customers, everybody! And a lot of 'em! You know what to do. Just like we rehearsed. Mater: It's the ghostlight! Helicopter: We have found McQueen. We have found McQueen! Cameramen: McQueen, over here! McQueen: Aaa, wait, excuse me. Cameramen: Is it true you've been in rehab? Cameramen: Did you have a nervous breakdown, McQueen. McQueen: I'm sorry, what? Cameramen: McQueen's wearing whitewalls! Cameramen: Are the tires you wearing are turning balding? Sally: Stickers, McQueen! Cameramen: Was Lightning McQueen your prisoner? Mater: Shoot, no! We're best buds! I ain't braggin' or nothin', but I was in charge of huntin' him down if he tried to escape. McQueen: Sally, Sally! Kori: McQueen! Will you still race for the Piston Cup? Sally: Stickers? McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Come on, give us some bolt! Mack: You're here! Thank the manufacturer! You're alive! McQueen: Mack? Mack: You're here! I can't belive it! Oh, hoho. You are a sight for some headlights! I'm so sorry I lost you, boss. I'll make it up to you! McQueen: Mack, I, I can't belive you're here. Harv: Is that the world's fastest racing machine? McQueen: Is that Harv? Mack: Yeah. He's in the back. Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! Mack: Get back, you oil-thirsty parasites! Cameramen: Hey, where's the old McQueen? Mack: Actually, this is my good side here. Cameramen: Show us the bolt! McQueen: Harv! Harv! Cameramen: Give us the bolt! McQueen: Harv? Cameramen: Come on! Harv: Kid, I'm over here! McQueen: How you doin', buddy? Harv: My star client disappears off the face of the earth! How do you think I'm doing? McQueen: Harv, I can explain. Harv: I'm doing great! You're everywhere, baby! Radio, TV, the papers! You can't buy this kind of publicity! What do you need me for? That's just a figure of speech, by the way. You signed a contract. Where are you? I can't even find you on my GPS. McQueen: I'm in this little town called Radiator Springs. You know Route 66? It's still here! Harv: Yeah, that's great, kid. Playtime is over, pal. While the world's been trying to find you, Dinoco has had no one to woo. Who are they gonna woo? McQueen: Chick! Harv: Bingo. In fact, check out what's on the plasma right now. Cameramen: Show us the thunder! Chick: You want thunder? You want thunder? Ka-chicka, ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! McQueen: Hey, that's my bit! Harv: You've gotta get to Cali, pronto! Just get out of Radiation Stinks now, or Dinoco is history, you hear me? McQueen: Just give me a second here, Harv. Harv: No,no,no, wait. Where are goin'. Get in the trailer, baby. Kid! You want, you want a bigger trailer? McQueen: Sally, I...I want you to... Look, I wish...Ahhhh. Sally: Thank you. Thanks for everything. McQueen: Ah. Haha. It just a road. Sally: No. It was much more than that. Mack: Hey, kid! We gotta go. Harv's goin' crazy! He's gonna have me fired if I don't get you in the truck right now! McQueen: Mack, just... hold it for... Sally: You should go. McQueen: I know, but... Sally: Good luck in California. I hope you find what you're looking for. Cameramen: McQueen, come on! McQueen: Sally! Cameramen: Show us the bolt, McQueen! The bolt! Hey, Lightning, show us the bolt! Cameramen: Where's the old McQueen? Harv: Come on, get in the trailer. That's it. That's right kid, let's go! You're a big shining star. You're a superstar. You don't belong there, anyway. McQueen: Whoa... Wait...Whoa,whoa,wait,wait! Cameramen: Hey, guys! McQueen's leavin' in the truck! Kori: Hey, are you Doc Hudson? Doc: Yeah. Kori: Thanks for the call. Sally: You called them? Doc: It's best for everyone, Sally. Sally: Best for everyone, or best for you? Mater: I didn't get to say goodbye to him. Bob: Hello, race fans, and welcome to what has become, quite simply, the biggest event in the history of racing. A three way battle for the Piston Cup! Darrell: There's a crowd of nearly 200,000 cars here at the Los Angeles International Speedway. Tickets to this race are hotter than a black leather seat on a hot summer day! Bob: The King, Chick Hicks and Lightning McQueen in a 200 laps, winner-takes-all, tiebreaker race. Darrell: You know I got a lotta miles on me, but let me tell you somethin' buddy. I never thought I'd see anything like this. Wow! Man. This is exciting! Bob: In fact, the country has almost shut down, to watch what many experts are calling "the race of the century." Junior: Hey, King! Good luck in your last race. You've sure been an inspiration to me. The King: Thanks, Junior. Appreciate it. Dear: Hey, be careful out there, OK? The King: Yeah, mam. Mia: He's hot. Chick: Wanna know the forecast? I'll give you the forecast. A 100 percent chance of thunder! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Say it with me! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Security: Hey, you! No admittance without a garage pass. Fred: Oh, it's OK. Lightning McQueen knows me! Andretti: Hey, Marco, it's a beautiful day for a race, isn't it? Security: Absolutely, Mr. Andretti. Andretti: And good morning to you, Fred. Fred: Mario Andretti he knows my name! You gotta let me in now! Security: Sorry, pal. McQueen: OK, here we go. Focus. Speed. I am speed. Victory, one winner, two losers. Speed. Speed. Speed. Speed... Mack: Hey, Lightnin'! You ready? McQueen: Yeah, yeah, yeah! I'm...I'm ready. McQueen: Mack, thanks for being my pit crew today. Mack: Nahh. Don't worry about it, kid. It's the least I could do. After all, "Gas Can" is my middle name. McQueen: It is? Mack: Nahh, not really. Small aeroplane: A. O. TV Crew: Nelson! Zoom in. Ready, 16? Take 16. Bob: And there he is, Lightning McQueen! Missing all week, and then he turns up in the middle of nowhere! In a little town called Radiator Springs. Darrell: Wearin' whitewall tires, of all things. Chick: Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Hahaha. Hey, where you been? I've been kinda lonely. Nobody to hang out with. I mean, except the Dinoco folks. Ohhh and the twins. Of course. You know the twins the one that used to be your fans, but now they're my fans. Anyway, listen to what the twins think... McQueen: Ahh. Shoot! Fans: Boogity, boogity, boogity, boys! Let's go racin'! Dear: Come on, you can do it! Tex: Come on kid, make us proud, boy! Bob: Fifty laps down, and The King is still holding a slim lead. Darrell: Hey, McQueen's got a run on him! He's lookin' to the inside! Ohh! Chick slammed the door on him! Bob: Chick's not making it easy on him today. Darrell: Oh, man, he lost so much momentum, and now he's gonna have to chase him back down! Bob: Ohhh, McQueen spins out in the infield! Chick: Hahaha! Just me and the old man, fellas. McQueen just doesn't have it today. Mack: Hey, kid, are you all right? McQueen: I don't know, Mack. I..I... I don't think I... Doc: I didn't come all this way to see you quit. McQueen: Doc? Guys: Yey.. Hahaha. McQueen: Guys, you're here! I can't believe this! Doc: I knew you needed a crew chief, but I didn't know it was this bad. McQueen: I thought you said you'd never come back. Doc: Well, I really didn't have a choice. Mater didn't get to say goodbye. Mater: Goodbye!! Okay, I'm good. McQueen: Hahaha! Doc: All right, if you can drive as good as you fix a road, then you can win this race with you eyes shut. Now, get back out there! Hot snot, we are back in business! Guido! Luigi! You're goin' up against professional pit crews boys, you're gonna have to be fast. Luigi: They will not know what bit them! Doc: Kid, you can beat these guys. Find a groove that works for you and get that lap back. Chick's Crew: Is that? Chick's Crew: Oh, wow. That's him! TV Crew: Is that...? That's the Hudson Hornet! Bob, Darrell! The Hudson Hornet's back! Bob: Darrell, it appears McQueen has got himself a pit crew. And look who he has for a crew chief! Fans: Wow... Look, man. It's the Hudson Hornet! Biggest fan: Whoa!! Fans: Well, dip me in axle grease and call me Slick! It surely is. Biggest fan: Hahahahaha! Bob: Wow, this is history in the making. Nobody has seen the racing legend in over 50 years! Lizzie: Hey, Doc! Come look at the fellow on the radio. He looks just like you. Bob: McQueen passes them on the inside! Darrell: But he's still nearly a lap fail. Bob: Can he catch up to them with only 60 laps to go? Doc: You're goin' great, kid. Just keep your head on. Guido: Vai! Vai! Vai,vai! Chick's crew: Hey, shrimpie, where did McQueen find you, huh? Those round things are called tires, and they go under the car! All Chick's Crew: Hahahahaha!!! Guido: Con chi credi di parlare? Ma, con chi stai parlando? Luigi: No! No, no! You'll have your chance. You will have your chance. Chick: Oh, kid's just tryin' to be a hero, huh? Well, what do you think of this? Yeah, that's it kid. Whats?? Mater: Whoa! Git-R-done! Hahaha! I taught him that. Ka-chow! Chick Crew: Auuww! Bob: What a move by McQueen! He's caught up to the leaders. Darrell: Oh, yeah. This is what it's all about. A three-way battle for the lead, with ten to go. Tex: Hahaha! Look at that boy go out there! Chick: No, you don't. McQueen: Doc, I'm flat! I'm flat! Doc: Can you get back to the pits? McQueen: Yeah, yeah. I think so. Doc: Hey, got a yellow. Bring it in. Don't tear yourself up, kid. Mack: We gotta get him back out there fast or we're gonna be a lap down, and we'll never win this race! Doc: Guido! It's time. Chick Crew: Hey, tiny, you gonna clean his windshield? Hahaha! Darrell: I don't believe it! Bob: That was the fastest pit stop I've ever seen! Darrell: It was a great stop, but he's still gotta beat that pace car out! Bob: It's gonna be close. Mater: Yeah!! Biggest Fan: Yeah, baby!! Fans: Yeah... Hahaha! Darrell: Yeah!! He's back in the race! Guido: Peet stop. Luigi: Guido, you did it! Mater: Way to go, Guido! Ramone: Yeah!! Bob: This is it. We're heading into the final lap and McQueen is right behind the leaders. What a comeback! Darrell: A hundred and ninety-nine laps, and, baby, it all comes down to this! Doc: This is it, kiddo. You've got four turns left. One at a time. Drive it in deep and hope it sticks. Go! Chick: We'll see about that! Bob: McQueen's going inside! Bob: Chick and The King are loose! Darrell: I think McQueen is out of the race! Darrell: McQueen saved it! Bob: He's back on the track! Doc: Float like a Cadillac... McQueen: Sting like a Beemer! Biggest Fan: Ka-chow, ka-chow, ka-chow! Fans: Wooowww! Folks: Yeeehaaaa! Hahaha. Darrell: Lightning McQueen is gonna win the Piston Cup! Sally: Come on! You got it! You got it, Stickers! Chick: I am not comin' in behind you again, old man. Dear: Oh, no! Chick: Yeah... Woooww! I won, baby! Yeah! Oh, yeah! Flo: What's he up to, Doc? The King: What are you doin', kid? McQueen: I think The King should finish his last race. The King: You just gave up the Piston Cup, you know that? McQueen: Ahhh. This grumpy old racecar I know once told me somethin'. It's just an empty cup. Bob: Darrell, is pushing on the last lap legal? Darrell: Hey, man. He's not really pushin' him. He's just givin' him a little bump draft. Chick: Whoaa.. Hohooo!! Hey. What? What's goin' on? Fan: That's what I call racin' right there. Tex: Hahaha! Luigi: Bravo il mio amico! Mater: Way to go, buddy! Filmore: There's a lotta love out there, you know, man? Sarge: Don't embarrass me, Filmore. Lizzie: That's my hot rod. Chick: Come on, baby, bring it out! Bring out the Piston Cup! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Yeah! Now, that's what I'm talkin' about! Hey, how come I'm the only one celebrating is me, huh? Where are the girls? Bring on the confetti! Auuww! Auuww! Easy with the confetti. What's goin' on? Come on, snap some pictures. I gotta go sign my deal with Dinoco! Ka-chicka! Say it with me. Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Ka-chicka! Cameramen: Booo! Mia & Tia: Booo! Chick: What's wrong with everybody? Where's the happiness? Hey! This is the start of the Chick era! Dear: Thanks, Lightnin'. McQueen: You're welcome. Fan: Way to go, King! Fan: You're still the car! Biggest Fan: You're The King! Yeah! Rust-eze Folks: Yeah! Hahahaha! Mack: Wahh! Hoo! Rust-eze Car: You make us proud, kid! Mack: Congrats on the loss, me bucko! Doc: You got a lotta of stuff, kid. McQueen: Thanks, Doc. Tex: Hey, Lightnin'. How 'bout comin' over here and talk to me a minute? Son, that was some real racin' out there. How'd you like to become the new face of Dinoco? McQueen: But I didn't win. Tex: Lightnin', there's a whole lot more to racin' than just winnin'. Rust-eze Van: He was so rusty, when he drove down the street. Hahaha. Buzzards used to circle the car! Folks: Hahahaha. McQueen: Thank, you, Mr. Tex, but...but these Rust-eze guys over there gave me my big break. I'm gonna stick with them. Tex: Well, I sure can respect that. Still, you know, if there's ever anything I can do for you, just let me know. McQueen: I sure appreciate that. Thank you. Actually, there is one thing. Mater: Whoah! Hoo! Aaaa! Hey look at me! I'm flyin', by golly! Whoahh! Hoo! I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park! Luigi: I think it's about-a time we redecorate. Michael Schumacker: Chow! Hi, Lightning McQueen told me this was the best place in the world to get tires. How 'bout setting me and my friends up with three or four sets each? Luigi: Huh. Guido! There is a real Michael Schumacker Ferrari in my store. A real Ferrari! Punch me, Guido. Punch me in the face. This is the most glorious day of my life. Michael Schumacker: Wow. Spero che il tuo amico si riprenda. Mi dicono che siete fantastici. Sally: Uh..huh!. Hahaha. Just passin' through? McQueen: Actually, I thought I'd stop and stay awhile. I hear this place is back on the map. Sally: It is? McQueen: Yeah, there's some rumor floating around that some hotshot Piston Cup racecar is setting up his big racing headquarters here. Sally: Really? Well, there goes the town. McQueen: You know, I really missed you, Sally. Sally: Well, I create feelings in others they themselves don't understand and, blah, blah, blah,  blah. McQueen: Hahaha. Mater: McQueen and Sally parked beneath the tree, K-i-s-s...i-n-t! McQueen: Great timing, Mater! Mater: Hep-non, hip-hep, hi-li-lilly! Weeeee!! McQueen: He's my best friend. What're you gonna do? Sally: So, Stickers, last one to Flo's buys? McQueen: I don't know. Why don't we just take a drive? Sally: Mmm. Nahh. McQueen: Yeah! Ka-chow! Mater: Yeeeehoooo!!!!! Song

the entire script of cars (2006)