#we're making progress but it's still awkward
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
scorpion-flower · 2 years ago
Text
Okay, confession time that's gonna make me sound like a shitty person, but on my trip from Catania back to Athens, I sat next to that lovely Canadian woman and her mother and we were chatting during the whole trip and we went out last night, and we went out tonight again (I was supposed to meet them for dinner, but I got to the wrong place and didn't get to meet the mother, but I still got to meet the young woman). There's a slight chance that we will meet tomorrow as well because she's leaving on Thursday, but I don't want to be that creepy person that always invites themselves.
And she's cute, funny and kind and I didn't know what got over me, but I didn't mention that I have a boyfriend, but I also assumed that she would not be interested anyway, because she mentioned past boyfriends and men she flirted with on her trip to Italy, and she's not gonna stay here for long anyway.
And because there was a miscommunication between the two of us and didn't meet her at the place she originally invited me to, and the messenger app wasn't working on my phone, I gave my FB password to my boyfriend and asked him to tell her to text me because I didn't have her number and couldn't reach her any other way. The boyfriend knows about her and how we met btw (he doesn't know that I think she's cute and hadn't tell her that I'm in a relationship tho, I know, shitty me.) It felt kinda weird asking him to log on my FB and text her, and he of course mentioned that he's my boyfriend, but I couldn't do anything else.
And when we actually saw each other tonight, one of the things the woman told me was "I thought that was weird because you didn't mention a boyfriend." but she said it in a way that I couldn't make sense of. I wonder if she was trying to figure out whether I wouldn't have made mention of it because the relationship is bad or because I had other things in mind. And then I thought "But what if she was actually interested? Now she'll never tell me."
I know I am a shitty person because I shouldn't be thinking this way. It's not fair for my boyfriend. I am probably overthinking things anyway and again, she'll be leaving on Thursday, so...
I don't know, I hope we stay in contact even as friends anyway because I really like her and feel that I want to preserve that personal relationship. I asked her if it's okay to message her on FB just to casually chat, and she said she's okay with it.
Yup, I'm definitely an idiot.
2 notes · View notes
rationaliity · 6 months ago
Text
progression | aventurine blurb
loving aventurine was as easy as breathing to you, something incredibly hard for him to grasp. he didn't get it at all. when he first walked into your life, he had this arrogant mask up, another one of his well preserved fabrications to protect himself. he was snarky to you. not necessarily rude, but he wasn't afraid to bare his fangs and show you that he was capable of hurting you if he needed to. he wasn't afraid of hurting anyone. another gamble he was putting his faith in, that he wouldn't be put in a situation where he would have to hurt you.
you loved him during that stage. every sarcastic 'friend' he tacked on to every sentence like it was more of an insult than anything else, every boundary that he crossed of yours, every little lie he spun to keep you at arms length, trying to protect you from his teeth. words hurt less than his bite. and yet, you were there for him even when he was sure he would have pushed you away, and it unnerved him.
" aventurine ~ " you called out from behind him to get his attention, before lightly jogging up to him, standing by his side. not in front of him, but beside him. " i know you might be busy today with business as usual, but i was hoping that you were free this afternoon ? there's this new coffee shop that opened up, and i though- "
" coffee ? sorry to disappoint you, friend, but i am busy this afternoon, " he shook his head, as if dismissing the idea outright entirely.
" oh, that's okay ! i'm still able to say hi right now while we're walking, so that's enough, " you chirped, but he could hear the unmistakable sound of disappointment and sadness in your tone, making the guilt inside of him at being the one who caused your unhappiness eat him alive. but the look on his face didn't change, his walls too big to penetrate.
he did find you at that coffee shop, though. " oh, hello, friend- " he had called out, approaching your table, sitting next to you without even asking. he saw your eyes light up, and for a second he felt the warmth in his chest burst forward, his heart beating against his ribcage. " what good fortune that i was able to finish my tasks a little while ago. i didn't think you would actually come here alone. " there was a hint of confusion in his voice, but it was masked just as quickly as it came.
after this interaction, aventurine got a little awkward with you. what was he expected to say ? what did he do if he wasn't trying to push you away ? he was clumsy with his words, often just silently nodding along as you talked, and sometimes bringing up tiny points. he wasn't good at conversation when it wasn't to serve an agenda. being in survival mode his entire life, he had no idea how to be social, much less to someone as kind as you.
no matter how much he stumbled and fell over his own words, you treated him the same. he approached you cautiously, as if he was afraid that one day you would get sick of him and throw him out of your life permanently. was his personality too much for you to handle ? was he doing something wrong ? he wasn't sure, this was uncharted territory for him. all he could do was throw his dice and hope for the best outcome, something that was so comforting now unnerving. he could bet every single one of his chips, every possession he owned, including his own life, but you ? betting on you felt like one risk he wasn't willing to take.
" hey- i was at this shop a while ago, and i was hoping that you'd want to visit ? with me, of course, " aventurine asked, trying very hard not to look how pretty you looked right now, how your smile made his heart flutter every single time without fail. " i saw something i thought you might like. i wanted to get it for you but i don't know your size. "
" oh ? yeah, i'd love to go with you ! " you agreed immediately, as if everything that you were doing before this was suddenly unimportant. " but you really don't have to pay for me, honestly. i can take care of myself. "
this through him for a loop, and he hid it well, but aventurine had no idea what that meant. did you not want him to pay for you ? or were you just trying to be modest ? it wasn't like he was hungry for money, it was fine on his pockets, and he didn't mind spending if it meant spending on you, of course. besides, what did you want from accompanying him if it wasn't to buy things ? that's what friends were for, right ? it was a mutual beneficial agreement between two people to be friendly with each other to gain something from another, right ?
he was pretty sure that was how it was to be friends, but you challenged all of that. especially when you bought him a drink from a shop. he'd just mentioned it offhanded that he could go for some boba tea, and you had agreed, saying that it would be really good right now. and then you bought him his ? that's not how that was supposed to work, he was sure of it. why would you go out of your way to pay for something for him that you yourself wouldn't even get to enjoy ? he was willing to buy you things to keep you around him, but you didn't need to buy him anything to keep him around.
the possibility that you didn't want anything from him other than his time and himself was confusion, but refreshing.
eventually late night outs became late nights inside, and aventurine found himself in a precarious position, on your couch, your body on the other side, cuddling up against a pillow. the intimacy of the situation felt like it was choking him. and he finally got the courage to ask you the question that plagued him - why ? why did you care ? why did you try so hard ? what was in it for you ? putting your bets on him was a foolish decision that he couldn't rationalize. even he didn't bet on himself.
" because you're worth it, " you shrugged a little, the answer's simplicity wiping everything from him. all of his fears, his confusion, his doubts, just for this moment. right now, he understood. you never pushed him out of his comfort zone, and let your companionship evolve naturally. he didn't even realize he had let you inside of his shell before it was too late. " because you deserve it. "
he thought you were worth it, too. trusting you, putting his faith in you even though you had the ability to hurt him. it was worth it. you were worth it.
496 notes · View notes
oracle-of-dream · 6 months ago
Note
Hiiii I really like your work and yes so anyway here goes nothing !
Could you maybe write a top!yeonjun x bttm male reader ?
Where the reader is the 6th member of txt and the plot is up to you (the reader does have a praise kink, tho ... but other than that, I will let you do as you wish ! )
Getting Close
Tumblr media
Minors DNI
Summary: You're the 6th member of TXT, a recent addition to the group, and you're having trouble getting comfortable with the members. As the oldest, Yeonjun takes on the job of caring for the newest member...
Warnings: Male Reader, Top!Yeonjun, Blowjobs, Deepthroat, Cum Drinking, Corruption Kink (lowkey)
Wordcount: 1.9k
The day wasn't too bad but you couldn't help but feel exhausted. It was a photoshoot, an interview, and then you had vocal lessons at the end of the day before being released back to the dorm. You did a lot of work with the other members one-on-one and it felt awkward working with them in less than a whole group setting...
At the photo shoot, you had to work with Taehyun. He was so professional and put together, you felt like a stick figure next to the Mona Lisa. You struggled through the shots with him, trying to lean toward him without being so stiff–but his face never gave away how he was feeling... You wondered if we were annoyed by you slowing him down. Then there was the radio interview with Beomgyu. His personality is something... different. You didn't know how to handle his energy or build off him well, so he spoke for most of the interview. The interviewer commented on your silence, asking if you were introverted. You just agreed with their guess so you'd have to speak less, saving yourself more embarrassment than you were already sitting through. You only remember saying "Hello" and "Goodbye".
Your manager had gotten onto you about trying harder to get progressively better with the group but the members were already so close to each other–there was no space for you...
Lastly, vocal lessons with Yeonjun.
You walked into the practice room, ten minutes early to warm up alone. The last thing you needed was to embarrass yourself in front of Yeonjun–Hybe's prodigy.
You wrapped up your vocal exercises just as the door opened. You stood up and bowed at the door, not looking at who walked in. "Hello," You muttered nervously.
"There's no need to bow, it's just me," Yeonjun said as he stepped into the room. He had a white jacket, a green tank top, and a white beanie. He smirked at you. "What are you being so cute for?"
You sat down, feeling your ears get warmer. "Sorry–I thought you were the instructor."
"I am your instructor today." Yeojun patted your head as he moved past you to the other seat. "The actual teacher couldn't make it so he told me what you'd been working on and asked me to help you."
"Like–together?"
"Yes, together! We're a team now." You'd always practiced alone with the teacher, even recording your debut–alone in the booth. You'd sang in front of fans and the members already, but only songs you'd spent hours and hours practicing. Yeonjun noticed you hesitating. "Are you nervous? I won't judge you, we're a team." Yeonjun emphasized the team by putting his hand on your thigh and shaking it.
"I know we're a team but–"
"No, buts! We're a team. Period. It takes time to adjust, but all the members are here for you–especially me."
You nodded silently. When you were still a trainee, you loved TXT and their songs were always the best to you. Even for monthly evaluation, you'd do a TXT song. Any time you'd hear they were in the building you'd silently hope you'd catch even a glimpse of them while they moved through their day. On the day you were told that you'd be joining TXT instead of debuting in a new group, your heart soared–not realizing it meant you'd have to be with your favorites all the time. The day you were moved into the dorm, the members looked surprised to see you. Apparently, they'd only been told you were coming earlier that day. It was probably unfair to them how they worked from the ground up and you were added in after they'd already poured so much work into their careers. It was tough not to feel like you were riding their coattails–even fans commented on how your spot was undeserved... But Yeonjun's eyes made you forget that horrible pit that had been sitting in your stomach.
You took a chance. After a deep breath, you asked, "How can I get closer to everyone?" Your eyes were wide with wonder.
Yeonjun smiled at you. "You're so cute... Maybe I don't want you to be close to everyone–why not just me?"
"Uhh–"
"I'm kidding, y/n. You should be close to all of us!" Yeonjun slipped his beanie off and shook out his hair. "We'll try taking it one step at a time. We can start getting closer and work together on getting the others in, okay?"
You knew Yeonjun was flirty on camera with the members, but you didn't know he was flirty off camera too. You couldn't tell if he was being serious or if it was just his personality... "Sure, that sounds good."
"That's great. And I've got a great way for us to get close fast." Yeonjun put his hand out to you. "If you want, then we can do it too. All the boys have done it to get closer to each other."
"Just tell me what I need to do." You took Yeonjun's hand. He immediately placed it on his crotch, pressing it against his half-hard cock. You took your hand back, eyes wide. "O-Oh I–"
Yeonjun gently leaned forward, sliding his hand over yours as he gently placed his lips on yours. "Easy. Take it slow," He instructed as he moved your hand again. Right back where he wanted it. His hips rolled into your hand, forcing his bulge to brush between your fingers as his hands cupped your face to hold you in the kiss. His plump lips tasted like strawberries, and his breath was cool and fresh with a hint of mint. When he pulled away, he looked you deep in your eyes. "Okay?"
You nodded. You didn't know what to do, but you knew that you didn't want to fight against it either.
"We're still in the building, so we don't need to get too involved today. Want my hands or my mouth?"
Your brain malfunctioned at his proposition, still trying to process the kiss.
"Cutie, stick with me. If you leave, how can I make you happy?"
"I don't know what to do..." You awkwardly cupped Yeonjun's bulge, feeling his pulse in your hands.
"Did you want to see mine first? That will make it easier." Yeonjun unbuttoned his pants and leaned back. "Go ahead, take them off. You've got me wherever you want me." Yeonjun's voice was a little deeper and softer, almost whispering. His eyes glazed over as he looked at you, waiting for you to do something. Following his lead, you tug at his pants–opening them enough to show his underwear. "Good boy, now the rest," Yeonjun cooed.
"Are you sure?" You asked for confirmation, but your eyes were still glued to his bulge. Yeonjun knew he had you.
"Only if you want it. I won't force you." Yeonjun started to zip his pants up when you stopped him.
"No! I–We should be closer because we're a team."
He nodded. "Now you're getting it, you're a part of my team. And everyone on the team does this. We can't date, and bringing people home is problematic, so we take care of each other's needs..." He stroked your ear. "Can you take care of me? Or do you need me to take care of you first?" He placed his hand on your knee, slowly sliding it up your thigh watching your expression for discomfort. You moved to the edge of your seat, matching Yeonjun, forcing his hand to touch you. "At the same time, then?"
You nodded as you slipped your hand into Yeonjun's underwear. He did the same, slender fingers dipping past your waistband. His cock's tip peaked out from his boxers and as you stroked him, it stretched further out until he slid his underwear down enough for all of him to stand proudly. Maybe you felt too shy, but you stopped Yeonjun from taking off your underwear.
"Okay, keep them on. I can still touch you like this..." While still stroking your cock, Yeonjun kissed you, squeezing your member every few moves to make you flinch.
You copied him, matching his pace and pattern.
"Oh, an observant boy? I expected you to be more playful like Beomgyu..." Yeonjun chuckled as he kissed your nose. "Can I have more, please?" He stood up, placing a hand on your shoulder to keep you seated. His cock, dripping with precum, pointed at you. "Can you suck it, please?" The way he said please make your cock twitch. He wasn't begging, it was more like a strong suggestion. He didn't want to force you to suck his dick, but he really wanted you to do it.
"I can," You said shyly as you leaned forward.
"Thank you, baby. Take your time with it, there's no rush." Yeonjun rubbed your head, letting his hand rest on you as you opened your mouth. You instinctually closed your eyes as you wrapped your lips around him. The feeling of his eyes watching you work was too much, you couldn't look back at him. Your tongue made the first move, swirling around the tip. Yeonjun's moans encouraged you, showing how he enjoyed it. You slowly sank deeper, using your hands to stroke the part that you couldn't cover. "Don't push yourself," Yeonjun moaned. You understood he was trying to be kind, but it made you want to push yourself hearing him be so patient for you. You bobbed your head, moving lower each time until the tip of his cock hit the back of your throat. "Jeez, you're so good. It's so deep in there..." His hand that was resting on your head mixed itself in your hair, making you more excited. You deepthroated him, gagging and gurgling on him, making so much noise. "Y/n, p-please, don't hurt yourself. I–fuck," Yeonjun tried to speak but you didn't give him any time to breathe.
You hollow your cheeks, taking him completely.
Yeonjun's eyes bulged as his knees buckled. "I'm cumming, m'cumming! Stop!" He tried to push you off him, even pulling your hair slightly, but you didn't budge as you held him inside your mouth. Yeonjun realized what you wanted and stopped pushing, instead pushing you down. "F-Fine, then drink it all if you want."
You felt his warm cum shooting straight down your throat, his cock pulsing and twitching as his hips rolled his pelvis into your face. Your nose scraped against his stomach a few times and your eyes rolled back–finally opening.
"Such a good boy, so good. The best!" Yeonjun moaned praises repeatedly until you slid him out of your mouth. His knees finally collapsed and dropped him back into his seat. He breathed heavily to catch his breath. "You didn't need to do so much... for me..."
You wiped a few tears out of your eyes. "I wanted to. I liked it. Hearing you tell me how good I did..."
"Oh?" Yeonjun smirked. "Then I'll tell you when you're doing a good job every time. And I'll make sure the others will too."
"The others?"
"Yeah. After today, they'll want to get close to you too..." Yeonjun kissed your cheek. "But remember who's your favorite. And don't forget I was your first in the group."
You nodded, a plush on your cheeks as you cleaned up your own mess. You hadn't even realized you'd stoked yourself to completion while sucking off your bandmate...
551 notes · View notes
aliteralsemicolon · 3 months ago
Text
Been seeing a lot about writing Spencer "accurately" online and idk where this wave of criticism is coming from, but I need every single one of you to be so fucking for real rn. Yapsesh below the cut.
Spencer Reid is a fictional character. Fiction means he's not real. He's a not real character from a not real universe. There's no "wrong" way to write a fictional character.
There is no canon guideline on how to write every part of him. Yes there are certain traits and characteristics we're shown, but people are complex. What we see the character do on screen isn't a complete representation of how they live every aspect their life.
Even the show runners couldn't get him "right" all the time, Hell, Mathew himself deviated from Spencer's canon traits sometimes. For example: his birthday, the fact that he's a germaphobe but you can still see him shake hands with characters when he normally wouldn't and there's SO many more if you just watch the show and pay attention.
Also there are things about Spencer that the fandom has deemed canon when they are not, in fact, canon. Like the converse: it's commonly believed that Spencer has a preference for wearing converse, which is wrong. That's a purely MGG thing. Spencer only wears converse in a few episodes through out the whole show. Most of the time he wears formal/work footwear, like loafers.
Now, there are definitely aspects you can't take away from a character in your writing because that's what makes the character who they primarily are. You'll notice that even in most alternate universe stories, Spencer still has the traits he's known for. IQ of 187, eidetic memory, socially awkward genius. That's literally how he was intended to come across during the initially seasons.
We only got new traits as the show progressed. Like how he's a sassy little shit who isn't scared of authority. The reason we can deviate from those is because they're not his core traits. His personality changes throughout the show. At times he appears like his same socially awkward self, but we also get to see his confident side with strangers at times.
It's literally impossible to label him a black and white character because there's so much we don't get to see. We don't get to see how he acts with love interests in every season (every season is a slightly different version from the last), we don't get to see how he acts when he's home alone, how he changes in so many aspects of his life. I think I'm just repeating myself now, but I think you get the point.
I find comfort in Spencer Reid's character, which is why I write about him. He acts however I want him to act in my writing because that's how I see him. Everyone has their own interpretation of the character. A lot of the interpretations share similarities with each other, so they're deemed as "the right way to write Spencer" by us, but that's not possible because there is no right way.
All this to say: Please stop criticising writers for how they write a character. You don't have to agree with their interpretation. There are other writers out there who you may agree with more. Engage more with them and disengage from the content you don't want to see.
210 notes · View notes
natsgrave · 2 months ago
Text
WHISPERS OF HEARTACHE | angstober
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
╰┈➤ synopsis: one day whether you are, 14, 28, or 65, you will stumble upon someone who will start a fire in you that cannot die. however, the saddest, most awful truth you will ever come to find is they are not always with whom we spend our lives.
Tumblr media
╰┈➤ welcome and short message: main m.list hello, my sweet gravels! i am thrilled to welcome you to "whispers of heartache," a collection of angst-filled one shots centered around the compelling characters of natasha romanoff / scarlett johansson, wanda maximoff / elizabeth olsen, and a female reader. this book is a labor of love, crafted from my deep admiration for these characters and my passion for storytelling. in this book, you will find a series of emotionally charged stories that delve into the complexities of love, loss, and heartache. each one shot will be written in the third person point of view, offering a broad perspective on the intense and often tumultuous emotions experienced by the characters. i must share that english is not my first language. therefore, you may encounter some grammatical errors or awkward phrasing throughout the stories. i appreciate your understanding and patience as i strive to improve my writing skills. my goal is to convey the depth of emotions and the intricate dynamics between the characters, even if my language skills are still a work in progress. angst has a unique power to connect with readers on a deep, emotional level. it explores the raw, often painful aspects of human relationships and personal struggles. through these stories, i hope to capture the essence of what it means to love and to lose, to fight and to surrender. each tale is crafted to evoke empathy and reflection, inviting you to experience the characters' journeys as if they were your own. your reblogs and feedback is incredibly valuable to me. as i embark on this storytelling journey, i welcome your thoughts, suggestions, and constructive criticism. please feel free to leave comments and reviews. your input will not only help me grow as a writer but also ensure that the stories resonate with you, the readers. thank you for joining me in this exploration of the whispers of heartache. i hope that these one shots will touch your heart and leave a lasting impression. happy reading! warm regards, G.J ps: i will be adding the first few angst that i already wrote in this masterlist even though it's technically not part of this masterlist. but, it's angst, so...
Tumblr media
╰┈➤ tolerate it
while you were out building other worlds, where was i? you assume i'm fine, but what would you do if i break free and leave us in ruins? ── .✦ pairing: elizabeth olsen x gf!reader
╰┈➤ new year's day
i want your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on new year's day. please, don't ever become a stranger whose laugh i could recognize anywhere. ── .✦ pairing: sister's bsf!elizabeth x fem!reader
╰┈➤ midnight rain
she was sunshine, i was midnight rain. she wanted a bride, i was making my own name, chasing that fame. ── .✦ pairing: actress!elizabeth x fem!reader
╰┈➤ you're losing me
how can you say that you love someone you can't tell is dyin'? do i throw out everything we built or keep it? and you know what they all say, you don't know what you got until it's gone. ── .✦ pairing: wanda maximoff x fem!reader
╰┈➤ in the next lifetime
but in those photos, i saw us instead and, somehow, i know that you and i would've found each other in another life. you still would've turned my head even if we'd met. you're always gonna be mine, we're gonna be timeless. ── .✦ pairing: general's son!steve x general's daughter!reader, maid!natasha x general's daughter!reader, scarlett johansson x fem!reader
╰┈➤ the manuscript
the only thing that's left is the manuscript. one last souvenir from my trip to your shores. now and then i reread the manuscript but the story isn't mine anymore. ── .✦ pairing: wanda maximoff x fem!reader
╰┈➤ the smallest woman who ever lived
and i don't miss what we had, but could someone give a message to the smallest man who ever lived? ── .✦ pairing: avenger!natasha x ex hydra!reader
╰┈➤ favorite crime
i hope i was your favorite crime, 'cause baby, you were mine. ── .✦ pairing: bsf!wanda x fem!reader
╰┈➤ mean it
on your lips just leave it, if you don't mean it. ── .✦ pairing: scarlett johansson x gf!reader
╰┈➤ love me nicely
i know you love me, but could you love me nicely? ── .✦ pairing: toxic!elizabeth x gf!reader
╰┈➤ if the world was ending
i know, you know, we know, you weren't down for forever and it's fine. i know, you know, we know, we weren't meant for each other and it's fine. but if the world was ending you'd come over, right? ── .✦ pairing: avenger!wanda x fem!reader
╰┈➤ soulmate
what a shame, didn't want to be the one that got away. taking down the pictures and the plans we made. big mistake, you broke the sweetest promise that you never should have made. ── .✦ pairing: fiance!elizabeth x fem!reader
╰┈➤ greatest what if
someday when you leave me, i bet these memories follow you around. ── .✦ pairing: actress!elizabeth x fem!reader
╰┈➤ heart
i knew it from the first old fashioned, we were cursed. should've known i'd be the first to leave think about the place where you first met me. ── .✦ pairing: elizabeth olsen x crush!reader
╰┈➤ too late
words— how little they mean when you're a little too late. ── .✦ pairing: avenger!natasha x avenger!steve, husband!bucky x avenger!reader
╰┈➤ i miss you
now, i fear i have fallen from grace and i feel like my castle's crumbling down. ── .✦ pairing: actress!scarlett x actress!reader
╰┈➤ wedding
sometimes giving up is the strong thing, sometimes to run is the brave thing, sometimes walking out is the one thing, that will find you the right thing. the snaps from the same little breaks in your soul, you know when it's time to go. ── .✦ pairing: elizabeth olsen x event planner!reader
╰┈➤ last memory
if i didn't know better, i'd think you were talking to me now. if i didn't know better, i'd think you were still around. what died didn't stay dead, you're alive, so alive, in my head. ── .✦ pairing: agent!elizabeth x agent!reader
╰┈➤ thank you
why'd you have to lead me on? why'd you have to twist the knife? walk away and leave me bleedin'. ── .✦ pairing: scarlett johansson x fem!reader
╰┈➤ we both had our chance
i persist and resist the temptation to ask you if one thing had been different, would everything be different today? ── .✦ pairing: avenger!natasha x avenger!reader
╰┈➤ i hate you
remembering her comes in flashbacks and echoes, tell myself it's time now gotta let go. but moving on from her is impossible, when i still see it all in my head, in burning red. ── .✦ pairing: shitty!scarlett x annoying!reader
╰┈➤ on bended knee
can we go back to the days our love was strong? can you tell me how a perfect love goes wrong? can somebody tell me how to get things back the way they use to be? oh god give me a reason, i'm down on bended knee. ── .✦ pairing: actress!elizabeth x actress!reader
╰┈➤ the cut that always bleeds
oh, i could be anything you need, as long as you don't leave. the cut that always bleeds. ── .✦ pairing: scarlett x gf!reader
╰┈➤ backburner
i'll always be in your corner, 'cause i don't feel alive 'til i'm burnin' on your backburner. ── .✦ pairing: agent!natasha x agent!reader
╰┈➤ the great war
we can plant a memory garden, say a solemn prayer, place a poppy in my hair. there's no morning glory, it was war, it wasn't fair and we will never go back. ── .✦ pairing: actress!elizabeth x gf!reader
╰┈➤ enough for you
and maybe i'm just not as interesting as the girls you had before but god, you couldn't have cared less about someone who loved you more. 'cause all i ever wanted was to be enough for you and all i ever wanted was to be enough for you. ── .✦ pairing: agent!natasha x insecure!reader
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ to be written:
╰┈➤ 1 step forward, 3 steps back
do you love me, want me, hate me? boy, i don't understand. no, i don't understand.
╰┈➤ better woman
i know the bravest thing i ever did was run.
╰┈➤ strange
isn't it strange how people can change. from strangers to friends, friends into lovers, and strangers again?
╰┈➤ lose you to love me
we'd always go into it blindly, i needed to lose you to find me. this dancing was killing me softly, i needed to hate you to love me.
╰┈➤ almost is never enough
almost is never enough, so close to being in love. if i would have known that you wanted me, the way i wanted you then maybe we wouldn't be two worlds apart, but right here in each other's arms.
╰┈➤ wish you were sober
kiss me in the seat of your rover, real sweet, but i wish you were sober.
╰┈➤ same ground
because i have learned that love is beyond what human can imagine, the more it clears, the more i have to let you go.
╰┈➤ the way i loved you
but i miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain and it's 2 a.m. and i'm cursing your name. so in love that you act insane and that's the way i loved you.
╰┈➤ champagne problems
your mom's ring in your pocket, her picture in your wallet, you won't remember all my champagne problems.
╰┈➤ last kiss
you told me you loved me, so why did you go away?
╰┈➤ maroon
the burgundy on my t-shirt when you splashed your wine into me and how the blood rushed into my cheeks, so scarlet, it was. the mark you saw on my collarbone, the rust that grew between telephones, the lips i used to call home, so scarlet, it was maroon.
╰┈➤ loml
you said i'm the love of your life about a million times.
╰┈➤ consequences
loving you was sunshine, safe and sound, a steady place to let down my defenses but loving you had consequences.
╰┈➤ casual
i thought you thought of me better, someone you couldn't lose.
╰┈➤ illicit affairs
they show their truth one single time but they lie, and they lie, and they lie a million little times.
╰┈➤ forever and always
oh back up, baby, back up, did you forget everything? back up, baby, back up, did you forget everything?
Tumblr media
152 notes · View notes
howthesleeplesswander · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Truth be told, Rhys may or may not have been using Timothy's whole "in need of a replacement hand" issue as a handy-dandy (ha—get it?) way of dodging the mental breakdown chasing at his heels as he stumbled through this situation. (Which was rich, honestly—as if he didn't already have a million things on his to-do list that could distract him from the walking specter living in Atlas HQ.)
Because yeah, it was very, very weird, and Rhys was very, very pathetic, considering that just coming face-to-face with that face again had forced him to realize that he wasn't as over it as he'd convinced himself.
But the thing was? None of that had anything to do with Timothy. Sharing Jack's face didn't make him responsible for Jack's actions. So, yeah, not only was Rhys just toootally not willing to poke the sleeping rakk's nest in the back of his mind labeled Jack Trauma™ with a one-thousand-foot pole, but Tim didn't deserve to deal with any of that anyways. For crying out loud—the guy had Jack's face. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black when it came to having Handsome Jack-related issues. There wasn't even a competition here; nothing came close to beating that.
The only problem was that Rhys had never been the type to just let things lie. Trying to turn a blind eye would only drive him crazy, so instead he focused on an alternative: if he couldn't make things less weird between them, he could at least get Tim's cybernetics taken care of. That was something he could fix; an action that he could take.
"Yeah, ya' know, that's pretty fair," he conceded. Hell, just thinking about how on-edge he'd be if he shared a face with someone so universally hated was liable to fast-track that mental breakdown all on its own.
A short, wheezing laugh answered Tim's gratitude. "Sure, sure—don't mention it." Surprise surprise, the bar for 'good reactions' to the whole 'doppleganger' thing must not be very high, considering the awkwardness thickening the air made him feel the least cool he'd ever felt in his life. "That's kinda my thing, actually: the cool CEO." He flashed a finger-gun to really sell it. Man, if only he still had his siege mustache...
As the conversation (mercifully) turned to a distraction problem he could dig his hands into, Rhys scooted his chair closer with a few harsh screeches on the floor and re-opened a program on his tablet for the dozenth time. "Ah, well, the Vault Hunters kinda saved my ass not too long ago. If it weren't for them, odds are I wouldn't even be here to do this right now." Lucky for both of them; no way would Katagawa have been half as 'cool' with this. "S-so, yeah: any friend of theirs is a friend of mine. Like, sure, I'm busy, obviously, but I wouldn't just foist you off on someone else. Definitely not cool."
Green light emanated from the tablet's face as the scanner program flashed ready. Rhys slid it within reach of his companion. "Just take the bandage off and hold it over this. I've got most of the components of your hand ready to go already, but I need some scans to see what kind of fastening it'll need where it connects. If it's not custom-fitted it can pinch and cause more damage, plus the scar tissue can spread, which—trust me—is not fun, so...yeah, hence the scans to avoid that."
You know, the thing about being the body double of probably one of the most widely known men in the entire freakin’ universe at this rate was that Timothy was . . . uncomfortably used to a smorgasbord of reactions to his face. On one hand, you had the supremely creepy worshippers (like that Nakaya—No thank you: whatever the crap that assface’s name was; Tim preferred forgetting he was an actual person he interacted with). On the other hand, you had hatred. Both the blind, kill-on-sight, “I’m gonna get off on murdering you” type of hatred and the pettier “You cheated on me, dickbag, and for some reason I’m surprised by this” type of hatred that usually resulted in a well-placed slap . . . or blackmail of some kind—
(The funniest thing about those people was that sometimes the handsome bastard himself didn’t even recognize or know who the hell Timothy was talking about if he ever brought it up. So, it’s like . . . did you forget, or did that lady just have a fun time with one of your doppelgangers? . . . God, why do I care—?)
In every single case, no matter who or what it was or how Tim was paying for Jack’s reign of terror, he understood. It wasn’t like he needed details. Any poor sucker had a right to feel some sort of way about the guy even when he was dead, and even when his actions had never been specifically personal to them. What was shocking here, the few times Tim chanced a peek across the desk—made easier by the CEO hardly ever lifting his own eyes—was that the behavior felt so much more . . . intimate.
Like, sure, okay, the phrase “you look like you’ve seen a ghost” was probably the most applicable it could possibly be right now, but it was more like . . . “you look like you’ve seen the ghost of a man who hogtied you, murdered your entire family before your eyes, and strung you up from the tallest cliff on Pandora for the rakks to do whatever the hell they wanted (or maybe the bandits; what was worse?).” This was the look and feel of a man who had a few Jack-shaped demons in his closet . . . Or, uh, Jack-shaped skeletons—? Point is: This wasn’t just awkward because of course it’d be awkward.
It was awkward because . . . C’mon, Jack. What the titty-freakin’ hell did you do to this guy—?
“Yeah, uh . . . Worrying is just kinda what I do at this point—? Y’know, it’s . . . ” A flippant hand (his only flippant hand) fluttered in the air as if to wave the CEO’s reassurance away. “It’s the post-Jackpocalypse package deal, you know what I’m sayin’? I mean . . . Right. You know.” He swallowed one of many lumps that kept forming in his throat, tugged gently at the collar of his sweatshirt that abruptly was way too tight. “But, like, thanks for being . . . cool about it. Cooler, I mean. More, uh . . . More cool than most people.” Which might be a weird thing to say, considering how extremely uncool and totally disastrous this interaction had been so far, but . . . Well, the lack of a gun in his face was pretty much the biggest positive Timothy had seen in a long time.
Take the wins where you can get them, kiddos. (🌈Inspired.)
When the conversation shifted—rather expertly, Timothy might add; good for you, CEO!—to something less about Jack and more about actual solvable problems, Timothy started. Like he’d just been called to attention, he straightened, nodded with the enthusiasm of things totally not being insanely weird since they first set eyes on each other. Yeah, they absolutely had their shit together. “Oh! Sure, I-I . . . didn’t think it’d be the CEO taking the time to— You know, usually the big corporate bosses kind of just . . . hand this crap off to the underlings, don’t they . . . ?”
6 notes · View notes
spread-the-influence · 23 days ago
Note
A kick isn't too much in the circus? That's fair, that's fair. I suppose if Pomni was kicked, her silly cartoon body would just absorb it like ballistic jelly. So how would post influence Ragatha react if Pomni ABSTRACTED. let's go from minor incident to soul crushing incident. Preferably I gotta know how she'd react mid abstraction. During the abstraction. And when she's In the celler.
Mid Abstraction: As Pomnis actively spiraling out of her mind and her body begins glitching. What does the sad doll do?
During the Abstraction: UH OH your crush has turned into a giant multi eyed monster, Ragatha. Are you going to blame yourself or try and do something about it??
In the celler: Whelp there goes your girlfriend. In a deep dark pit of despair for eternity. I wonder if she's fully aware of her surroundings. Must be like hell to be sitting in a dark pit full of monsters with nothing to do. But I'm sure Ragatha will just move on. Maybe the next newbie who shows up will also be a cute jester girl? Or maybe she'll be dead inside forever. Who knows really. Well besides YOU ya puppet master.
i can't stop giggling . i Very much appreciate this essay dropped in my ask anon it just makes me giggle how we're going to think up of angst for the supposed ' comfort ' portion of the au to pay off all the hurt that's done prior . might as well answer this while working on the next pages
if there's one Noticeable difference between ragatha and her post-influence self , it's that she's more ... proactive , to put it ? do not be fooled by her sad puppy aura , she's in the mode of wanting to Repent for her sins ! which means she'll do Anything to be there for her friends , even if it means she'll go on another fucking Coma while doing so .
atoning with her Life basically
mid and during abstraction , ragatha still suffers from a debilitating condition doctors call Cringefail Syndrome , where she still tries to see the light in a situation because what the fuck else is she going to do . so of course she's going to think that she could possibly reverse pomni's abstraction if she tries hard enough .
it's up for debate whether this is going to be successful or not . but hey . i'm sure it'll be fun to imagine ragatha trying to pull pomni out of a mental breakdown without having to speak .
as for the aftermath , it really depends . if this is around the period where ragatha's still trying to ease back into Everything and repairing her bonds with everyone - the first years basically - all of that progress will be snapped away in an instant . around that time , she's hugely depending on pomni emotionally because she's the only thing keeping ragatha from Completely Fucking Losing It . taking away her only anchor will make the entire ship sink down
around the period where everything's fine now and the circus's back together i guess , um ... It'll still be Very bad but it's not the end of the world . ragatha has her friends to support her through it . i mean , kinger coped well with losing his wife , so maybe ragatha could do so too ... even though she and pomni never married . and they're probably awkward about saying they're girlfriends . so they just say they're close frien
72 notes · View notes
goquokka00 · 9 months ago
Text
The Roomie Effect (Pt 2)
Part One | Part Two | Part Three
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Summary: You're roommates with your friend Jisung and his boyfriend, Minho. The downsides? You're attracted to both of them, and they're a fairly...active couple. Little do you know; they're also attracted to you. And they want you to be in their relationship with them.
Pairings: Jisung X Reader (F!) X Minho
Genre: Fluff, humor, non-idol au but Stray Kids still knows each other, smut (MDNI)
Warnings: Mentions of sex and alcohol, "vaping" (reader uses diffuser sticks like pure and cloudy, so no nicotine), reader gets drunk, anal sex (male x male), Sub! Jisung, Dom! Minho, Jisung jerks himself off, cumming inside
Word Count: 6.6K
Tumblr media
"You're actually dumb, you know that?" You told Jisung, looking at the answers he had come up with for your Music Theory homework. It had been a few days since they had...y'know...and everything seemed pretty normal.
It was a little awkward the next day afterward, as Jisung couldn't look at you without blushing. But after reassuring both of them that you didn't hear a thing (you definitely did but you didn't want them to worry), everything seemed to go right back to how it was. Which was good, because you'd hate for things to change between the three of you.
"How?! That's right, that chord progression is right!" Jisung countered, pointing to the sheet of paper.
"No, it's not!"
"Yes, it is!"
"A three chord can't go to a seven diminished, dumbass!"
"Yes, it can! See, look at the chart that YOU made!"
"Bitch, that's going to a four or two chord!"
"Oh, well would you look at that." Jisung said, taking the chart and getting a closer look. "It is, isn't it?"
"I told you, you're dumb."
"Hey! You were the one asking for my help!"
"Hey, quiet down in there or I'm getting the tissues!" Minho yelled, looking into the kitchen from the living room. The both of you flinched at the threat, already knowing that he would 100% do that if given the opportunity.
"Sorry, Min." Jisung apologized. Minho just let out a sigh, rubbing his temples.
"It's fine, don't worry about it. Just...keep the volume down." Minho said, turning back to his work.
You didn't blame him for wanting it to be quiet. Unlike you and Jisung, who had to make music, Minho had to watch people dancing to it.
Minho was a Dance Choreographer Major, wanting to go into making dances for idols and professional dancers. And one of the things he had to do was evaluate different dances that they were assigned to watch. Talk about what the teams do well, what could be improved, and things that the students would take and use for their own choreographies.
And that's what he was doing right now.
"You got it. We'll be as quiet as mice." Jisung told him, giving his boyfriend a thumbs up.
"See, you say that, but my bet is that you're gonna start yelling again."
"Am not!"
"Then what are you doing right now?"
"Oh, wow, real funny, wise guy."
"Oh, this is funny? We're gonna see how funny this is in about 3 seconds-"
"Guys!" You yelled, finally having about enough. Both boys blushed, looking over at you. "If you're gonna fuck, do it already--"
"We aren't gonna fuck!" They both yelled at the same time, faces now red. All you could do was laugh, twirling your pencil in your fingers.
"Then both of you quiet down, please. Minho, we'll stay quiet. Jisung, let's just look at the next problem right here." You said, keeping your eyes on your homework.
"Oh, yeah. Sure." Jisung said, going to look at the problem as well. As the two of you went back to work, Minho watched both of you closely, smiling at the sight of the two of you working together. It was cute, the way that you'd point something out and Jisung would nod, only to explain it to you in a way that you'd understand.
He wanted to see it all the time.
||
"Hey, have you seen Ji's--What are you doing?!"
You almost fell out of your chair in shock as Minho burst into your room, catching you with one of your diffusers in your mouth. You took it out, coughing the vapers as Minho went and took the diffuser from you.
"These are bad for your health, you know that?!" Minho yelled, looking like an angry mom. Well, he was acting like it, too. But you just gave him a pout, crossing your arms as he held the diffuser out in front of you.
"Relax, it's not what you think it is." You said, grabbing the box to the stick and holding it out for Minho to look at it. "It's a diffuser pen, no nicotine. All they have is vitamins. That one specifically has B12 and C."
"You sure?" Minho asked, looking to you. You just nodded, getting up and going over to him, taking the diffuser out of his hands.
"Yeah. I only use them when I'm studying or can't sleep. I have a melatonin one for the sleep problem, but I also use it to keep my mental shit in check." You explained, breathing in a puff, letting it out along with the vapers. Then, you held it out to Minho, smiling. "I haven't used this one for a few days, and I haven't used the melatonin one in forever. So if you don't believe me, go ahead and try it."
Minho gave you an unsure look but took the diffuser. He gave it a quick glance, looking back at you before putting it in his mouth and did what you had a few seconds before. Except unlike how you breathed in and out without a hitch, Minho coughed the vapers out.
"What the hell?! Why was that so cold?!" Minho asked, looking to you as you laughed a bit.
"It's supposed to be refreshing. Honestly, it feels really nice after talking or singing all day." You said, gesturing for him to try again. "Don't worry, I had a similar reaction to it my first time. You get used to it."
"And you're sure I won't get addicted or high or anything?" Minho asked. You just laughed, shaking your head.
"Nope. I don't do that stuff, and if I did, I wouldn't be pressuring you to do it." You told him. Minho nodded, breathing in again. This time, he held it in his lungs for a second, before breathing out the vapers. "See? Not so bad, is it?"
"Actually, it's not." Minho told you, handing the diffuser stick back. "They're actually pretty nice."
"Mhm. They're probably the only things keeping me sane in college besides alcohol, you, and Jisung." You admitted, laughing a bit. Your laugh was music to Minho's ears.
"We keep you sane?"
"Yeah, I mean, you guys might be a bit much sometimes, but honestly, I think I see you guys as some of my closest friends."
"Huh." Minho nodded, though, your words stung a bit. Just friends? Is that really all you saw them as?
It wasn't.
You wouldn't admit it, but it hurt you to say that as much as it hurt Minho to hear it. You really liked both of them, after all. You wanted nothing more than to be with either of them. Hell, maybe even both. But...
You couldn't. They were already together, and they were fucking adorable at that. You couldn't ruin their relationship, no shot. That was a shit thing to do, both as a friend and as a roommate. But there was no use dwelling on it right now.
"So uh, you asked if I've seen something?" You asked, just wanting to move on and forget about that.
"Oh, right. I was wondering if Ji's lyric book was in here."
"Mm... I don't think it is. There wouldn't really be any reason for it to be."
"Huh. Well, he told me that you two were working on lyric writing from one of your classes, and that he had used his lyric book for your drafts."
"Well, knowing Jisung, he probably misplaced it somewhere in Misul." Misul was the Fine Arts building on campus, and it was the building that you and Jisung spent the most time in.
"Yeah, that sounds like him." Minho let out a sigh, running a hand through his hair before smiling to you. "Well, just keep your eyes out, okay?"
"Will do." You said, giving a kind smile to Minho. With that, Minho left you to work on your studies, which you did at your own pace.
Lofi blasted through your earbuds as you worked on chord progressions and writing down intervals for tuning forks. By the time that you had decided to take a break, you looked up to see the time.
2:41 am.
Shit.
You couldn't help but let out a sigh, knowing that you weren't close to done with everything. And since it was a weekend, that meant it was all-nighter time. Again. But not before taking a break for yourself. After all, your brain could only handle so much.
And so, you got up from your chair and stretched, letting out a sigh and looking around your room for no reason. It was something you always did, probably just to take in your surroundings. Who knew? You certainly didn't.
But as you turned back to your desk, you couldn't help but notice a foreign notebook on your shelf. Black cover, silver spiral binds...that wasn't your notebook. You knew your notebooks, as you were really picky about what notebooks you used. It was normally Campus notebooks, or notebooks with covers you found cute. You never had such plain spiral bound notebooks. So it definitely wasn't yours. But it didn't take you long to realize who's it was.
That was Jisung's lyric book.
You stopped your stretch session, grabbing the notebook and looking at the cover. There was no doubt about it, that was his. The cover was slightly beaten up, which would make sense from how religiously Jisung used it. You flipped it over, taking note of the back being almost the exact same way.
And then, your curiosity starting whirling.
You couldn't help but wonder what lyrics Jisung had written. What thoughts were in his words. What stories he was trying to tell. You wanted to peek inside and read some of what he had written, so much so that you didn't realize your hand slowly lifting the front. cover.
That's when you stopped yourself for a second. This was wrong. A lyric book was practically the equivalent of a diary or journal. It was private thoughts. Hell, most of these lyrics probably wouldn't even be turned into songs. That's how it usually worked. Taking a peek into the book was a terrible idea.
But...it was late. Both Jisung and Minho were asleep, and there was no way that they'd know. The only one who would know that you peeked was you, so long as you kept your trap shut. Which you could definitely do.
And so, you opened the front cover.
For the most part, the songs inside showed a lot of different emotions. Some were directed towards his own mental state, others were directed toward confidence or hate from others. Something you took note of was how he had dated everything up in the top corner. Probably so he could look back at it way later and visit what he had written.
And then, you got to more recent dates. The previous encounters were still somewhat evident, but you also started to take notice of a new genre. You assumed romance, something you never thought you'd see Jisung exploiting in.
But here you were.
One of the first you came across was labelled "143". As you read through, you took note of the confusion evident inside of the song. It was still about love, but you interpreted it as more like someone falling in love, but not really understanding why. But there were definitely some lines that caught your attention.
I'm falling for your fatal attraction...
There are no words that describe the perfection...
Why do I keep getting attracted?
I'm drawn to you like a magnet...
I cannot explain this reaction, 1-4-3
I love you...
You couldn't help but raise a brow at the lyrics. What did he mean by that? This could potentially be reflecting on how he felt back when he first met Minho, and not really understanding why he was falling for him, but that didn't make sense.
Jisung was one to write what he was feeling in the moment, not reflecting on the past. That's why he literally carried this lyric book around with him all the time. And you knew for a fact that his feelings for Minho were irrefutable. So him questioning what he was feeling? That was recent.
But who was it for?
That's when you flipped to another song, one he decided to title "Want so BAD". At first, while reading the lyrics, you were almost certain that this was a love song for Minho. Knowing your friend, it wasn't impossible. But then, like before, a few lyrics caught your attention.
I think it's so sweet my baby...
So many thoughts keep me awake every night of you...
I know it's pain, but I really want it so bad...
Up and down, it's a breathtaking roller coaster ride...
Come closer, just the three of us...
Together, we make one whole romantic comedy movie...
I'll hold you tight and say I've always been waiting for this moment...
If I hold it any longer, I might just blow up...
For us, it's you...
That...definitely caught your attention.
For one, Jisung never referred to Minho as "my baby". Hell, you've never heard him refer to anyone as that. So that meant that this was someone new. Someone that you assumed him and Minho both liked, due to the use of mentions of "us" and "three" being used.
Slowly, pieces were being put together. Minho and Jisung found someone they both liked, and you assumed that they were planning on going Polyamorous with. But that left you with the single question of who it could be.
Minho had a lot of friends; you were well aware of that. But he only shared 7 friends with Jisung. You happened to know these people, too.
Chan and Changbin were Jisung's closest friends, as they were both going into the same thing as Jisung: Music Production. You had also met them when you were a freshman, and they were both really nice. But you knew Jisung never saw them as lovers. Neither did Minho.
Hyunjin and Felix were the two who had actually introduced Minho and Jisung, and Jisung had introduced you to them afterward. Hyunjin was going into Dance Performance, and Felix was going into Dance Choreography like Minho. And while they were both beautiful people, you knew that Jisung and Minho didn't see them as love interests either.
And Seungmin and Jeongin, who were going into Music Performance like you, were way too young in their eyes. They saw those two like little brothers. Then again, so did you. And that meant that...
No. No no, there was absolutely no way.
He wasn't...those lyrics...
Fuck.
||
After piecing together that the lyrics that Jisung had written were about you, you immediately took the lyric book out to the kitchen counter and put it underneath some other textbooks, took that melatonin diffuser, went to bed, woke up, and texted Hyunjin and Felix, asking if they'd be willing to go to the bar with you.
You needed a drink. Badly.
When they had texted you back that they'd be willing, you eagerly waited for the evening to roll around. Thankfully, both Jisung and Minho were out all day, going to spend time with each other out in Seoul. Which was good. Really good, mainly because you knew you'd probably combust on the spot if you looked at Jisung right now.
Once 7:00 pm rolled around, you got dressed in clothes that didn't make you look like you rolled out of bed and headed out the door.
Cut to now, with you sitting in between a very concerned Hyunjin and a very tipsy Felix, downing your...well, you don't really know how many shots you've had. You just know you've had a lot.
"Okay, don't you think you've had enough?" Hyunjin asked, watching as you and Felix cackled about some random sentence he had spouted. It was safe to say that you were both feeling the alcohol.
"No, I gotta drink more...'m fine!" Felix said, leaning against you. You just smiled at Hyunjin, patting his thigh.
"We're soooo good, Hyunnie...we're perfect!" You added. Hyunjin only sighed, looking to the bartender and nodding his head, silently asking for the bill.
"I think we need to get you home." Hyunjin told you.
"But I don' wanna! I...I can't go, not when they're there...they're gonna be all lovey dovey an' making me wish I was both of them..."
"Y/n, what--"
"'N they both like me...a-an' I like them, an' I shouldn' know that, but I do...!"
"Come on, let's go."
"NO!"
"Y/n..."
"No! No, don' wanna!"
"Don't make me call Jisung, because I will."
That got your drunk self really quiet. You just let out a huff, crossing your arms. Then, Hyunjin looked to Felix, who had just finished paying for the bill.
"I'm gonna call a taxi. You got it from here?" Hyunjin asked. Felix gave him a salute, going over to you and carefully putting your arm over his shoulder. With that, he gently lifted you off of your seat and guided you to the exit of the bar. Hyunjin was quick to follow, flagging down a taxi while Felix stood with you.
Soon enough, all of you were inside and driving to your apartment.
"I don' wanna go..." You whined, Hyunjin just rolling his eyes at you.
"Why?"
"Cause...I like 'em...an' I think they like me? But...idonknow..."
"Well of course they like you. They're your friends."
"Nononononononono, I think they like-like me...an' I really like 'em..."
"Okay, so?"
"So...idonknow what ta do about that...what would you do?"
"I'd probably see how it plays out? Or confess. If it seems like they like you like that, then you might as well let them know. Get it off your chest."
"...nah." You just crossed your arms, leaning against the now passed out Felix. Just as you did so, the driver had pulled up to your apartment complex, parking close to your building. Hyunjin got out, helping you get out as well and threw your arm over his shoulders, going to the driver's window.
"Just wait here, I'll be right back." Hyunjin instructed, the driver nodding. With that, you and Hyunjin started making your way up the stairs and towards your home. You didn't really try to fight him, since the alcohol in your system made you feel like you were moving in fast forward and slow motion at the same time.
But your drunk brain was absolutely dreading going and seeing Minho and Jisung again.
||
While you had been out with Hyunjin and Felix to drink your concerns away, Minho and Jisung returned to the house from their date day. Overall, it was a great day for the both of them. They went shopping, saw a movie, ran some errands, and went out to eat for dinner.
And when they returned to the house around 8:00 pm, they were a bit surprised to notice that you were missing. Then again, there were times that you went out for late errands or going to the convenience store for snacks or energy drinks. So they weren't really worried.
Instead, they both settled down on the couch, Jisung laying on Minho's chest, and started watching an anime series that you had actually recommended them. They had managed to get through the first few episodes, getting into the setting fairly quickly. But they were soon interrupted by a knock on the door.
"You weren't expecting anyone, were you?" Jisung asked, looking up at Minho as he sat them both up.
"No, not today." Minho said, pressing a kiss to Jisung's forehead. "I'll be right back, stay comfortable. Okay?"
"Okay." Jisung said with a smile, watching his lover get up and go to the door. And when Minho opened it, his eyes widened at the sight of you slung over Hyunjin's shoulder, barely able to hold yourself up.
"Delivery." Hyunjin said, gesturing over to you. Minho just raised a brow as he took you from him, confused.
"Do I wanna know?"
"She's drunk."
"No shit, she's drunk. Why?"
"She wanted to ignore her feelings. That's why."
"How much?"
"Lots of shots, three mixers. She's probably not gonna remember jack squat tomorrow."
"For the love of...Jisung!" Minho called out, turning to his boyfriend on the couch. Jisung immediately sprung up, looking over towards the door to see you, Minho, and Hyunjin. So it didn't take him long to go over to you all with concerned eyes.
"What happened to her?" He asked, Minho handing you to him.
"She went drinking, apparently."
"Without me?!"
"Dude." Hyunjin commented, raising a brow at Jisung.
"What? She usually doesn't go to bars without me." Jisung pouted, kicking at the floor.
"We can figure that out later, just--take her to her room, get her water, get her changed, and get her in bed." Minho instructed. Jisung nodded, knowing that Minho had a point. And so, he started walking you to your room and sat you down on your bed.
"There we go, nice and easy." Jisung said, steadying you before slowly backing away, giving you a kind smile. "Alright, I'll be right back, okay? I'm just gonna go and get you some water--"
"N-No..." You mumbled, reaching out for him. You managed to grab his wrist, keeping him from going any further than your arm length.
"Y/n...you're drunk. You need to sober up a bit, okay? I'm just going to the kitchen to get a glass of water, okay? I'll literally be gone for like, 30 seconds--"
"No! Y'gotta stay! Do-Don' leave, please..."
"Hey, I promise I'll be right back." Jisung told you, giving you a warmer smile than his usual kind one. He carefully peeled your hand off of his wrist, setting it down by your side. "If you let me go, I'll stay with you for the entire night. Deal?"
"M'kay." But it didn't stop your drunk self from pouting. It made Jisung's heart throb, making him feel like he was gonna explode from how you were acting like a child. In a cute way, mind you. But he had a mission to complete.
And so, after knowing that you'd stay put (partly because he didn't think you could even walk by yourself), he quickly went out to the kitchen, grabbing a cup and filling it with some water before going back to your room.
Only to find you shirtless while trying to take your shorts off.
"Oh my god!" Jisung immediately flushed red, covering his eyes at the sight of your nearly naked body, turning around to give you some sort of privacy. "What are you doing?!"
"Gettin'...gettin' comfy womfy....hehe.." You giggled, Jisung just letting out a sigh before setting the cup down and straight to your closet.
He dug through it, finding a pretty big sweatshirt. All of your sweatshirts were oversized, but some didn't get to be quite long enough to hide undergarments. This one would, though.
"Okay, stop stop stop. Let me help you, please." Jisung said, getting your hands away from your shorts you had decided to wear. You stopped, staring at him with wide eyes as he quickly slipped the sweatshirt over your head, trying to keep his eyes off of your beautiful chest and gorgeous curves.
That wasn't his focus right now.
Once the sweatshirt was on, Jisung took hold of the shorts and carefully took them off, ignoring that your eyes were on him. And once that was done, he took the dirty clothes and threw them into the hamper, then grabbing the water and giving it to you. Though, he couldn't help that your eyes were still on him, having not left him once.
"Here, drink that." Jisung told you, watching as you sipped on the water. You let out a sigh, setting the cup down and looking to him again. It was hard to tell what you were thinking. To Jisung, it was already hard to tell, even more so when you had been drinking. "What?"
"You're...sooo pretty..." You told him. Your voice was so soft, which made Jisung's heart throb again. He gulped, not registering your hand that came close to his face, gently feeling his lips.
They were so soft. So plush. You always had a gut feeling that his lips would be that way, due to how pouty they always looked. But in your drunken state, they felt way better than you were expecting.
"You're really pretty. Pretty baby boy." You muttered, leaning forward a bit to look at him closer. Jisung just blushed more, leaning back a bit as drunk you leaned in closely, admiring his face. But he was caught on your words. Did you really think that, or were you just more gone than he thought?
"Um...t-thanks...?" Jisung trailed, almost in a daze. Why was his head spinning? Why was his heart going a thousand miles an hour? Why was his pants getting tighter?
You were drunk. You were drunk, you probably didn't mean half of the shit you were saying, and you certainly weren't meaning everything that you were doing. He wished you weren't, though, because that would mean he could act on his feelings. But that would be wrong if he did that while you were intoxicated. It wasn't right.
Until you got closer. Really close. So close, that if someone were to push either of you, you'd for sure end up kissing. You didn't seem to notice, which made sense. But Jisung sure as hell did. And it didn't help when you put both hands on his thigh, leaning on it to get to be that close.
"W-What are you doing?" Jisung asked, sounding hesitant. It was a good question, that was for damn sure. But you answered it. Just...not with words.
You placed your lips on his, instead.
Jisung's eyes widened, surprised by your actions. You didn't. Did you? He could feel the weight of your upper body, so it definitely wasn't a dream. So then, you were. You were kissing him. Shit. Fuck. What? But-how is he supposed to respond to that? You're drunk, but he wants to kiss back. But he can't because he'd feel like he'd be taking advantage of you. But your lips feel so good against his. They were soft, and they fit perfectly. Lord help him.
Thankfully, you pulled away, the cutest pout ever on your face. It made Jisung's heart wrench. God, what were you doing to him?
"D'ya not wanna kiss?" You asked softly. Jisung took a moment, the words taking a while to sink in, but it didn't take long for him to respond. To the best of his ability, anyway.
"I-I do, but you-and I--and we...but--MINHO!" Again, he tried his best. But in the end, he couldn't do much about the situation. He was too much in shock about what was going on. It didn't take long for Minho to come through the door, seeing both of you.
"What...?"
"She kissed me, and I wanna kiss her, but she's drunk, an-and--"
"Wait, slow down. What?" Minho looked between the two of you, only to see you trying to kiss Jisung again. Instead, you latched onto his neck, leaving open-mouthed kisses. That only made Jisung whine.
"Min!" Jisung whined, looking to Minho. He didn't need to ask any more questions, instead going to you and moving you off of Jisung, and more onto him.
"You gotta be careful, y'know. It's pretty easy to turn Jisung on when you do stuff like that to him." Minho told you, pressing a kiss to your head.
"It is?"
"Yeah. Look at him, you can see his cock through his sweats." Minho was right. You could see the tent forming already. And to your drunk self, it was beyond hot.
"I wan' it in ma mouth."
"Y/N!" Jisung yelled, his face blushing as he moved to hide his boner. Minho just let out a sigh, looking over to your desk to spot that familiar purple box.
"Ji, why don't you go and grab that purple box over on her desk?" Minho asked, Jisung nodding. He quickly went to grab it, while Minho grabbed your water and held it to your mouth. "As for you, you really have to sober up, or your hangover's gonna beat your ass."
"Mm...but I wanna kiss you." You said, looking up at Minho. He just sighed, helping you drink your water while Jisung handed the box to him.
"Tell you what? If you finish this water, I'll kiss you." Minho told you. Oh, intoxicated you was so down. And so, you got right to work on your water, sipping quickly, but not to the point of chugging it. After all, you knew your limits. You knew that if you chugged the water, you'd definitely end up throwing up.
So it was slow and steady.
Soon enough, your water had been downed. You set the glass on the nightstand (You tried, it almost fell off and Jisung somehow managed to catch it), looking to Minho. He already had your melatonin diffuser out of it's box and ready to go for you to take it.
"Good girl." Minho told you, giving you a smile. He was honestly just happy to see you finish your water. You smiled at the praise, knowing what was coming next.
"Kiss?" You asked, Minho complying. He leaned down, placing his lips on yours. His lips were also soft and fit perfectly with yours. But unlike Jisung, who was completely frozen in shock by your actions, Minho took charge of the kiss, leading you through it. He knew what he wanted, and he made sure he got it.
Hot.
But the kiss didn't last long, as Minho pulled away, making you whine. That single sound you made hit both Minho and Jisung hard, going straight to their cocks. The only difference was that while Minho managed to hide the fact that your whine turned him on, Jisung just whined in response, looking to Minho.
"Min..." Jisung whimpered. He just sighed, not looking to Jisung. Instead, he placed the diffuser into your mouth. As if it were an instinct, you breathed in, taking a puff, before letting it out, feeling the coolness of the vapers hit your throat as they left your mouth.
"Go to the bedroom, strip, and wait for me. And you better not fucking touch yourself, or you're not cumming. Got it?" Minho then spoke. His eyes glanced to Jisung, the look alone sending a shiver down Jisung's back. But he wasn't about to pass up the opportunity.
And so, Jisung flew off the bed and went to his and Minho's room, awaiting what Minho had planned for him.
"As for you..." Minho said, looking down at you. You were leaning against his chest, still breathing in the melatonin diffuser, probably on your 4th puff. "How many hits do you have to take in order for the melatonin to kick in?"
"S-Seven, but 'm already tired...wanna cuddle..." You said, looking up at Minho with a pout. Minho smiled, placing a kiss on your forehead.
"Not tonight, okay? I can't keep Ji waiting for so long. Otherwise, he'll get into some trouble." Minho said, moving some hair out of your face. "But I can give you some cuddles tomorrow when you're going through your hangover."
"Fine, but you better keep your word, Minnie." You mumbled, rubbing your eyes. At this point, you were fighting sleep. You didn't want to go to sleep, but between the melatonin and the alcohol, you were pretty close to passing out. Course, Minho was also extremely comfortable.
"I will. Now, let's lay you down." Minho said gently. He helped you lay down so you were comfortable and pulled the blanket over you, placing a kiss onto your forehead. By the time he went back to look at you, you were out. Minho smiled, gently stroking your cheek with his thumb.
You were so precious.
"Sleep tight, baby." Minho whispered to you. He left one last kiss on your forehead, not being able to help himself, before going over to his and Jisung's room, having some sexual frustrations that had to be let loose. Not to Minho's surprise, Jisung did too.
The second that Minho made it into their room, there was Jisung on the bed, completely naked on his hands and knees, looking behind him to meet Minho's dark stare.
"Min... need you..." Jisung whined, Minho smirking. He walked up to Jisung, placing his hands onto his ass and spreading his cheeks, admiring the way his cock jumped at the feeling of his hands, and his tight hole clench.
"Damn right, you do." Minho growled, leaning down and licking his hole. Jisung immediately gasped, his hips jerking back to get more friction. "Before I fuck you, you need to promise that you'll stay quiet."
"B-But why--"
"Y/n just fell asleep, and we both know she's gonna be in for it in the morning. I promise you can be loud some other time, but she needs to rest for now." Minho told him, carefully slipping his fingers into Jisung's ass. To his surprise, he was already stretched out and ready to go. "Jisung, did you--"
"I-I know, I know you said to not touch myself, but I was so desperate, an-and I wanted to be ready for your cock, Min... need it so bad, I--"
"Hm." Minho just sat up, keeping his fingers inside of Jisung, taking his own cock out of his pants. Jisung didn't know what that meant, but it got him both nervous and extremely excited. "I'll let it go this time. But next time, you do exactly what I tell you. That includes no prepping."
"Yeah! Yes, of course, 'm sorry, I just--it won't happen again, promise--" Instead of finishing, Jisung cut himself off with a long moan, Minho's hand going to cover his mouth as he pushed all the way into Jisung's tight ass.
"Remember, quiet." Minho told him. Jisung nodded, putting his hand over Minho's. And with that, Minho began to thrust, going at a pretty moderate pace. Enough to give pleasure to both, but not to the point where it was unbearably slow or ungodly fast.
It was just right.
Minho's brow furrowed at the feeling of Jisung clenching around him, his thighs tensing as he heard Jisung's muffled moans and whines. God, he loved Jisung's noises, but it was too risky to uncover his mouth. If there was anything Minho knew about his boyfriend, it was that Jisung was vocal.
"Good boy, nice and quiet for me. You're doing good." Minho told him, leaning down and kissing his neck. It only made Jisung moan out louder. Not that he could help it, as his neck was sensitive. "She really got you riled up, didn't she? Got your cock all hard, your mind all foggy. You even got to feel her soft lips on yours, didn't you?"
Jisung nodded, agreeing with Minho's words. He did, and he'd love to feel them again. They were addicting, those lips of yours. He wanted more of them. More of you. And Minho felt the exact same way. God, and that whine of yours...it wasn't even because you were horny or needy, it was just because you wanted to kiss Minho more.
If that's how you whined for something so simple, so minuscule, Minho couldn't help but think about how loud you could get if you were being fucked by him or Jisung. And those thoughts went straight to his dick, making that knot in his stomach grow quicker than ever.
"Shit, I'm not gonna last that long, baby. Y'gotta meet me there, stroke yourself." Minho instructed. Jisung instantly followed them, wrapping a hand around his raging cock and quickly stroking it, crying out at the stimulation. Judging by the way Jisung was squirming, Minho could tell that Jisung wasn't gonna last either. "Just-Just cum whenever, baby. Just let go, fuck, I'm gonna--oh, I'm cumming! Shit, I'm cumming!"
And like that, Minho released inside of Jisung, filling him up. The feeling of being so full was what did Jisung in, the boy practically wailing as he shot his load into his hand. Once Minho was sure that Jisung had released fully, he removed his hand from Jisung's mouth, only to be pulled into a kiss.
Their lips locked together, tongues dancing. Jisung was frantic, just like always. But there was also a sense of laziness to it. Minho was lazy too but was more precise. And when they parted, panting into each other's mouths, Jisung smiled, lifting his head up so he could touch Minho's forehead with his.
"Fuck, I love you so much, Min." He told him, Minho smiling at his words.
"I love you too, Ji." Minho replied, kissing his cheek before getting up so he could clean himself off. Jisung just laid, flipping to his back and waiting for him there on the bed.
As Minho stood in the bathroom, gently wiping his softened cock off and getting a warm rag for Jisung, he couldn't help but think about why you had even gone out drinking in the first place. Something about ignoring your feelings? What feelings could they have possibly been?
Jisung was quick to tell that Minho was thinking about it, seeing his brow furrowed in thought as he walked over and started wiping Jisung down. Jisung frowned, watching Minho carefully as he was cleaned, letting Minho take his hand to work on it after his cock had been fully cared for.
"You're thinking about something." Jisung pointed out. Minho sighed, setting the rag somewhere on the counter. When he got back to the bed, Jisung moved his head so his eyes would meet Minho's, giving him a concerned look. "What's wrong?"
"It's just...don't you find it weird that Y/n went drinking without telling us? Or inviting you?"
"Well, we were out on a date. Maybe she didn't want to bother us."
"But she never wants to drink out of nowhere. Let alone without you. Hell, I think the only time I've ever seen her drink was when you were with her. She would've waited, wouldn't she?"
"Maybe something was bothering her and she just needed a distraction? I don't know, it's not worth looking into. We shouldn't question her decisions, y'know?"
"Yeah, I know. But...then again, it's not like her to want to be so physical with us. Even when drunk. It just makes me wonder..."
"Wonder about what?"
"What if she does like us? I mean, why else would she really want to kiss both of us, and be so cuddly?"
"Well, I don't know. But I've never seen her so drunk. Maybe it's because she was wasted when she got back." Jisung just let out a sigh, shrugging. "Like I said, it doesn't make sense to question it right now. We're reading way too much into it."
"Are you sure?" Minho asked, Jisung nodding.
"Yeah. If there's anything I've learned, a drunk Y/n is a hard to read Y/n. It's difficult to tell what she's thinking, what she's feeling." Jisung said, smiling at Minho. He gently guided him up to lay next to him, placing his head onto his chest and relaxing against him. Feeling Jisung relax made Minho relax a bit too. "I think the first step is to see if she even remembers what happened tonight. If she does, we gently tread. If not, we just keep taking things slow."
"Wow, you sound just like me." Minho told Jisung. He just giggled as Minho placed a kiss onto his head, his smile not fading.
"Yeah, well, it's what you've been telling me to do for how long?" Jisung remarked, letting out a yawn. "Let's just focus on helping Y/n out through her hangover, and we'll go from there."
Minho just smiled, pulling Jisung close to him and closing his eyes. Jisung did the same, feeling the comfort and warmth radiating off of Minho.
"Sounds like a plan."
Tumblr media
Hey! Firstly, thank you so much for reading this post, and I really hope you enjoyed! If you did, please like, reblog, or comment so I can see how I'm doing with writing and getting feedback! I hope you have a lovely day! Sleep well, stay in good health, and eat something if you haven't! ❤️❤️❤️
205 notes · View notes
lixie-phoria · 9 months ago
Text
[14.0 sweater weather] BETTER THAN REVENGE !
Tumblr media
◂ previous | masterlist | next ▸
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
the night was loud. between jeongin and han's bickering, changbin's laughter, and chan's occasional reprimands, there was no place for awkward silence. even as the seconds advanced towards midnight, and the rest of the campus fell into a peaceful silence, jeongin's dorm was filled with noise.
and for that, you were grateful.
"you dumbass you didn't boil the ramen enough!"
"I did. This isn't my first time making ramen!"
"no it's still-"
"ok that's enough," chan interjects, throwing an exasperated glare at the youngest boys of the group. "Han if you think the ramen is undercooked just add warmer water to it."
"I don't think that's how it works-"
"oh for fucks sake just eat the damn food!"
you watch in amusement as the boy sinks further into the couch, a pout puckering against his lips as he shoves the chopsticks into his mouth.
"nobody ever takes me seriously here-"
"anyways!" changbin exclaims, meaningfully pinching han's side as his eyes raise to meet yours, "we have more important stuff to discuss than how jeongin makes ramen."
it takes you a second to realize all their eyes have turned to you - although jeongin looks unwilling.
"so yn, innie here isn't giving you too much trouble, right?" changbin teases, digging his elbow into his friend's side.
"of course i haven't-"
"let her speak!"
you laugh at the way jeongin huffs, crossing his arms before falling back into his seat, avoiding your eyes.
"he's a pain. i can't wait for this to be over," you play along - much to han and changbin's excitement as their eyes light up.
"has he? well that isn't acceptable, is it?"
"can you leave me alone?"
but that seemed to be the last thing on any of their minds as they turn their attention towards you again.
"you know when he first told us about your arrangement we were a bit worried," chan adds, "but this seems to be working out for you guys."
chan was by far the only one who hadn't teased the youngest boy, but you could clearly see he was just as interested in the conversation.
"yeah well, we're trying. we'll see how much it's really helped him after our test next week."
"yeah-"
"but has this been helping you as effectively?"
you blink at han in confusion as he leans forwards from the couch.
"what?"
"han drop it-"
"you know with the entire making yeonjun jealous plan? i hope you've been giving his cheating ass a hard time!"
yeonjun.
cheating.
oh.
all the progress you had made came crashing down in that single moment.
han hadn't anticipated the depth of his words, obviously. it was a mistake, and you understood that, but the weight still fell like solid lead down your stomach. your throat clogged up, and you could barely meet any of their eyes as the culprit slapped a hand across his mouth, evidently regretting it.
cheating little slut.
yeonjun's words came breaking through the barriers you had tried so hard to build.
it's your fault.
you didn't think it was possible, but your mother's words pierced deeper than yeonjun cheating on you.
any sensible boy would break up with you.
she was probably right. nobody in their right minds would like someone who couldn't even bring herself to move past the boy who had cheated on her.
you should apologize to him. like your mother expected you to.
your company had obviously picked up on your discomfort, and if you hadn't been so caught up you would be embarrassed at the revelation of the chink in your armor.
"you dumbass," you hear changbin hiss under his breath.
"yn im sorry-"
jeongin was the first to act - slipping his hand into yours to pull you up - sending a sharp glare towards his roommate.
"i think we're done for today," he said, gently guiding you towards the front door, picking up your books on the way.
"you guys clean up, please. i'll drop yn back to her dorm."
he only gave you enough time to bid your goodbye to the three boys - including a forgiving smile towards han - before you two stepped out into the cold night.
"you don't have to walk me back."
"it's past midnight, yn. i'm not letting you go alone."
you were grateful, despite your hesitance. the last thing you wanted was to be alone with your thoughts.
"and i'm sorry about han. he didn't mean to bring him up."
you shake your head, patting jeongin's arm in comfort. "it wasn't his fault, don't worry about it. and please tell him not to feel guilty either. it's alright."
"but are you sure you're okay?"
were you okay?
you didn't know.
until the last match, you and yeonjun were technically still on good terms. there had been no bad blood.
but after your argument? you didn't even know where your relationship stood.
you hadn't broken up officially. you were still together, and the thought was sickening. not because you wanted to break up with him. no. but because it was reassuring. and you hated the little comfort that it bought.
"yn?"
your gaze snaps to the side as jeongin's hand softly brushes yours.
"sorry, i was just thinking," you sheepishly mutter, avoiding his eyes.
he doesn't push any further, and the rest of the walk is spent in silence until you reach your block.
"thanks jeongin."
he shoves his hands into the pockets of his sweats, smiling back as the street light shines down on him, highlighting his features.
"don't worry about it. sleep well, yeah?"
you almost send him away with that, but the cold breeze that flutters past your skin jars you into your senses.
"wait!"
you hastily take off your hoodie, patting down your ruffled hair as he turns to look at you in confusion.
"something wrong?"
"it's cold. take this. you didn't carry yours," you say, thrusting the article at him, avoiding his eyes.
"oh it's fine-"
"we have an important exam coming up. i'd hate it if you fell sick because of me."
he doesn't notice the blush dusting your face as he thankfully accepts the warmer clothing, and you're grateful for the dark.
"thanks yn."
"i should thank you."
he grins at you one last time before he's on his way back, absentmindedly fiddling with the sleeves of your hoodie, sending a kaleidoscope of butterflies fluttering in your stomach. you hoped you weren't imagining the tips of his ears turning red. you hoped he would keep it, and only give it back when it had caught on to his scent.
in a much better mood than with which you had set out from his dorm, you almost manage push away yeonjun to the back of your mind.
that is until your phone notifies an incoming message.
never mind.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
©lixie-phoria, 2024
taglist open! Send an ask to be added :)
taglist 1 @thisisnotjacinta @jiisungllvr @hanjsquokka @abbiestearsricochet @adestayskz @thisrandombitch @adr1an4 @alnex05 @cheesemonky @endlessheadache @tiapatito202278ok @queen-in-the-shadows @heeee24 @chanceonceli @amesification @conwunder @weareapackofstrays @taejun-sunlix @lofasofabread @untilthesunrises @jinnie-ret @darlingz99 @kibs-and-bits @143lix @simp4myself @thisrandomgoofy15 @vixensss @luvkpopp @skz-streamer @luvenus702 @syds-dead
157 notes · View notes
wizzdot · 3 months ago
Text
The Patron Saint of One Way Trips
Ch12
Tumblr media
Description: sorry for the long wait guys! Work has been crazyyyy - anyway. Here it is! Lil bit of progress with Simon - I reckon it’ll be 1 step forward, 2 back for a little while. Simon and Laika are both as fucked up as each other!! It’s a long chapter to make up for the wait. Hope you enjoy!!
Tumblr media
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
I'd been warned during dinner last night that I was going to be 'put through my paces' today. The Captain told me to get a good nights sleep. Kyle and Johnny dropped me off at my room - Kyle said goodnight with a soft kiss to my cheek, and Johnny told me not to let the bed bugs bite. He also kissed me on the cheek, but it was far too close to the corner of my mouth. He must have missed his target. I spent all night trying to brush it off.
*Johnny's POV*
The pizza had been good, Kyle was bold and kissed our little lass on the cheek. I couldn't stop myself, had to one up him.. Her little blush and awkward reaction made it worth the risk. Gaz and I practically ran back to our shared room - we needed to rest up for training tomorrow. We finally get to see what our little Lass is made of.
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
Knock Knock Knock
"Lass? Can we come in..? Y'ready for us?"
I'd just stepped out of the shower. "Uhh - two seconds.. I'm just getting changed" I shout back through the door. I rush to pull on some workout shorts and a black sports bra. I glance at myself in the mirror. I swear that I already look healthier - I'd gone sort of gaunt during my time at the facility. My skin looks brighter, I'm cleaner and relaxed... and happier.
"I'm dressed but still need to braid my hair.." As soon as the words have left my mouth, Johnny barrels into the room, followed closely by Kyle. "Mornin', Lass" - "Hi Johnny" I reply, softly. Kyle puts his arm around my shoulders and smiles brightly at me "ready for today? Cap's in charge of what we're doing.. just need to see where we are at with you.. apparently there's shit going down in Mexico so we might need to step in over there... Just before Christmas too.." he sighs sadly.
I furrow my brows - "Christmas? I thought it was October??" - "Ignore him, Lass, he is one of them crazy people who wants to put the tree up straight after Halloween".
I look at Kyle and giggle. "I thought it was winter when you first found me" - "It's always winter in Russia to be fair" Kyle jokes back. "Yeah but you can't go confusing me like that.. I've not been aware of seasons or dates for years, I was just starting to grasp it again.. so no Christmas stuff until December...?" I explain, feeling more and more relaxed around the two younger Alphas everyday. "You promise to be here for Christmas, then?" Johnny bargains. There's that sad flip in my stomach again. "I - I don't know where I'll be, Johnny.. I don't think I am in control of that decision".
"We'll not let you leave.." Kyle jokes "Aye, hide you away from the others" Johnny continues, nudging Kyle. They both laugh but I just shake my head.
We are interrupted by the Captain who stands in the open door, not stepping inside. "Laika, didn't I tell you that those two shouldn't just let themselves into your room like this...?" - "I - I let them in, Cap- Sorry- John" he huffs a laugh "If you say so. Put your trainers on and let's get to the gym before the basics turn up for the day. Ghost's there already". he grumbles, rolling his eyes at the possibility of basic training turning up mid-session.
"You don't have to worry if the rookies turn up, Lass. They're a bunch of prats, think they're all Billy big baws and like to throw their scents around and show off.. if any of them bother you, we'll sort 'em out" I look at Johnny and nod with furrowed brows. I was nervous.
The Lieutenant is loitering menacingly at the sparring mats when we all arrive at the gym. "Took your fuckin' time" he grunts. I try not to react but I can't help the guilt that washes over me. "Laika, on the mat" he jerks his head toward the mat. I obey and step onto the mat, ringing my hands together nervously, chewing the skin inside of my cheek. "Gaz, I want you to go through basic sparring movements, see what she's made of" the Luitennant orders. Kyle looks between the masked Alpha and myself with unsure eyes. "Are you sure..?" I look up at him nodding "I'll be ok.. orders are orders" I reassure myself, trying to slip back behind my own mask. Trying desperately to become the asset again. Unfeeling, cold and calculated.
My eyes start to take in Kyle's movements, analysing when and how he will move. He is the leanest of the pack of Alpha's, meaning he is probably the fastest. But I'm smaller and, hopefully, smarter. He steps, hesitantly onto the mat and raises his arms into a defensive position. "Gaz, for fuck sake, move!" the Lieutenant barks "She ain't going to throw the first punch!" Something inside of me screams 'NOW'.
I leap forward and slide to the ground taking Kyle's legs out from under him before he has the chance to react. He was too busy concentrating on the upper half of his body.
Kyle falls backwards and lands just beside me, so I scramble to get nearer, using my legs to restrain his arms and placing my forearm over his throat firmly so he couldn't move. I meet his eye, and he looks completely shocked. Then a slow smirk starts to form on his face. He reaches up and taps twice on my back. Impressive, lovie" he chuckles. I release him and clamber away from his body, which is still laying flat on the mat, I start apologising over and over again..
"Soap.. your turn. Try not to get distracted like Garrick did, this is all pointless if you go easy on her.." Ghost barks. I look at Johnny with sad eyes. "C'mon, lass.. you heard the man. Lets have a proper tussle" he wiggles his eyebrows. My body betrays me, as it so often does, falling victim to Johnny's flirtatious comments. I blush and look away. This time Johnny is on me as quickly as I look away. I'm the one caught off guard this time. SHIT.
He gets us both to the ground and I can tell he is attempting to use his weight advantage against me. He just wants to get me pinned which will win him the match. I realise that I need to get back to my feet, and fast. I allow him to roll me far too easily which gives me the momentum to push away from him. I knee toward his crotch while we roll and manage to catch him lightly, just enough for him to curl in on himself slightly, giving me a small enough window to climb back to my feet.
He tries to get up quickly but he is on his knees. I grab his neck and use all of my body weight to pull him to the floor, practically wrapped around his torso like some sort of demented koala bear. He chokes slightly and taps twice on my upper arm, which is currently holding his neck in a headlock. I immediately let go, "Sorry.. I'm sorry. I hate this..." I panic, thinking that I'd pissed him off. "Lass, nothin' to be sorry for. You're a feral little madam on the mats.." He brushes his legs off and grabs me around the shoulders, pulling me towards his chest. He presses a quick kiss to my hair and pushes me gently back towards the mat, not before whispering in my ear "Clever little Lass".
"Not bad" Ghost says. "Tell me what you think of knives.." - "the winner of a knife fight is whoever dies second, or finds help quickly enough to survive. No one stays clean in a knife fight.." I murmur. The luitennant tilts his head and narrows his eyes at me. It's difficult to read his thoughts when he has the mask on, but what I'd said obviously struck a nerve with him. "Show me what you mean by that - here.." he hands me a dummy knife and steps toward the mat behind me..
"Wi-with you..?" I ask nervously. "Problem?" he grunts back at me. I shake my head.
He stands there with confidence. I must look ridiculous. I don't know what to do. The lieutenant suddenly takes a wide swipe with the knife, it narrowly misses my stomach thanks to my quick survival instincts telling my body to jump backwards. I suddenly snap back into the 'asset' mindset. I leap forward and aim for his head. His eyes, to be specific. I see a flash of surprise cross his eyes before he slams the knife from my hand, pain shoots up my entire arm but I ignore it. I react by kicking his outstretched arm so that he is also knife-less. I then leap at him and try to clamber up his back. He grabs me by the shoulder and slams me hard on the ground winding me. I slide backwards, terrified at the behemoth of an Alpha towering over me. I whimper, scared trying to get away, still winded and pain still shooting up my arm.
"Stop. STOP" he bellows. I whimper again, confused and terrified. I can see a storm brewing behind the masked Alpha's eyes. "GAZ - get her up, for fuck sake.." the Lieutenant storms away from the gym, the Captain following closely behind him. My eyes don't leave his form until the gym doors swing shut and Kyle and Johnny are cooing at me, trying to calm me down.
*GHOSTS POV*
FUCK, she's not a trained soldier by any stretch. But Christ, she goes into a desperate survival mode. Kill or be killed is the only description I can think of. Watching how she sparred with Kyle and Johnny, she was scared. Acting out of fear, and fear alone.
I wanted to see her knife skills - I don't know why I decided I should spar with her. She suddenly switched. That look in her eyes. She was feral. She was genuinely trying to hurt me. She had no differentiation between training and real fighting. It was all real to her. Kill or be killed - and she thought I was trying to kill her... She thinks I'm a monster.
I try to stop her by disarming her, I know my thumping blow to her arm must have hurt. It had to, but she barely even flinched. She was in survival mode. She caught me off guard and disarmed me. Clever girl, leveling the playing field - if this was a real fight that is - but I was trying to halt the fight. She needed to cool off before she went even more feral.
I was NOT expecting her to leap at my back and try to choke me. It left me with only one option - to flip her and get her flat on the ground. It worked for a couple of seconds. She paused, the look in her eye no longer murderous. But within a split second, she stunk of pure fear. Like she was staring at death himself. Me. I try to step forward with a hand out to show that I was no longer armed but she backed away, eyes flashing like a cornered dog.
SHIT. Why'd my stomach do that. I'm trying to help her and she's fuckin' terrified of me. Fuckin' hurt her too.
"Stop" I try. It doesn't work. "STOP" fuck Simon, why can't you be fuckin' gentle for once?! Brute - my brain shouts at me.
"Gaz - get her up, for fuck sake.." I shout. She looks helpless but, fuck, I feel helpless as well. I've never felt like this.
The sharp, sour smell of her fear. It makes my eyes water. Makes me want to fuckin' hurl. I turn and leave, not feeling well all of a sudden.
She has two Alpha's she actually likes to help her. Fuck, I hope she isn't hurt.. I don't deserve nice things. My Pack are probably going to drop me now. The fucking brute that you are Simon Riley.
The anger at my own stupidity boils over. I'd almost made it back to the Pack room but my fist meets the wall before I get there. I roar, angrily - or did it sound more broken than that? FUCK. Then I smell Price. He is fuckin' seething. I can already smell him.
I slam the door to the shared room and slide down the wall, grabbing angrily at my mask. I rip it from my face. "ARGRGHHHHHH" I roar again. I grab fistfuls of my hair. Fuckin' prick.
I hear the door close and then a presence sit beside me. It's Price.
"What the bloody hell happened back there Simon?" he growls. I can tell he is holding back his rage.
"She was feral" I grunt. I didn't know what else to say..
"And why was that..? Why did you let it get to that stage..?" he asks. Fuck sake, he is treating me like a fuckin' child.
"Wasn't just me. The girl doesn't know the difference between practice and survival.. She was fighting for her fuckin' life" I growl, pulling at my hair.
I feel his hands pry mine away from my head. "Simon. C'mon. Look at me.." - "Alpha - I need some time..." I break slightly.
"Time for what, Simon?" - "Time to think. I don't understand what is happening.. I can't stand the girl. I can't be near her"
John stays silent beside me, knowing that I needed to find my own way out from this maze.
"But.. but when she had that look in her eye, I needed to protect her. Protect her from me.. It's either me or her, Cap. I can't be near her. I'll kill her".
A warm hand grips my shoulder and squeezes. "Simon. You are too hard on yourself. You are the glue that often holds this pack together. Laika is finding her place in a new world. You've been in a similar position. I have a feeling you two are more alike than you think. Please, give it time. I'm not throwing you out of the pack, Simon. I'm not even angry at you. Never doubt your place or importance here, Simon - Never. Is that understood?"
My eyes furrow. I grab my mask and pull it back over my face. "Yes, sir. Understood" - "good, now come. The boys will have calmed Laika down by now" - "I hurt her" I interrupt. "You didn't mean to. I know you were trying to stop the fight. I saw it" - "she will need the medic.. I hit her hard. Can't do anything gentle. Fuckin' brute" - "Simon.. you did what you had to... she was going feral. C'mon, no more sparring. We will move onto target practice and finish with a five kilometer run - together. That'll be enough to fill in her file. We can make up the rest. She is on the team, I don't care about all of the tests".
I can feel my head clearing, the pack Alpha had successfully dragged me from a dark spiral. My panic attacks were not pretty. I get back to my feet when he offers me a hand to help hoist me up. "Sorry.." - "No Simon, save your apologies. Small steps, yeah? Let's work on chipping away at that wall you put up around Laika first. The boys adore her already.." - "I know. Johnny reeks of her at night time. Felt like I was wakin' up next to a fuckin' Omega this morning" - "Simon, she hasn't presented. I had her tested - results aren't back till next.." - "John - she is a fuckin' Omega. Stunk of honey and oranges since the first time I saw her tied up against the wall when Johnny found her. Can't you smell her..?"
"Faintly. The doctors said her scent will settle once the drugs leave her system. But her scent - it's barely there, Simon. She smells more like Johnny and Kyle right now" he shakes his head at me as if he doesn't believe me. "That's impossible.." - "I'll talk to the doctors tomorrow, Simon. We've got to get through today. I've got Kate on at me about Mexico - we will need to decide what to do about that - so the sooner she is cleared to work with us, the better, understood?" - "Yes, sir" - "Right, screw your head back on and come with me. I'll take the lead for the rest of the day. You sit back with Johnny and cool yourself off, ok?" -
“Affirmative”
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
Kyle and Johnny saw what happened. They saw me trying to kill their pack mate. "I'm sorry - I don't - I don't know what happened.. I'm.." - "Shhh Love, hey, look at us - you need to look at us. We aren't angry at you. The Captain is with Simon, he will be ok. We need to check your back and your arm. You got hit pretty hard.." Kyle explains, stroking my cheek.
"Aye, Lass, c'mon, let us have a wee look, just want to make sure you're ok.." - "I'm fine.. I'm ok.." - "You sure..?" - "Yeah, promise" I assure them, even though I am feeling the aches from Ghost's hits. I jump slightly when the gym doors crash open. It's them. The Captain and Lieutenant. Ghost stops about 10 yards from the rest of us. I try not to look toward him, still feeling nervous. I see the Captain nod Johnny in Ghost's direction and Johnny immediately walks toward the massive Alpha and comforts him.
The Captain steps closer to me. "You're ok to continue? Not hurt?" - "No, Captain" I pretend. "Ok, we are going to the shooting range.. boys, lead the way" He directs toward Johnny and Ghost. They both turn and lead us to the shooting range. It's a huge open field. Targets and metal human-shaped silhouettes peaking out from behind pretend trenches and sand bag walls.
There are a couple of sergeants already shooting when we arrive. I get handed a set of ear protectors from John. He then walks me to a locked metal shed and explains that this is one of the gun-stores on the base.
"You said you were a sniper?" _ "Yes" - "What'd you use..?" - "Uhm.. A gun..?" - "You don't know what model of rifle?" - "Oh.. sorry.. no - I just used what they gave me, just happened to be quite good" I admit shyly. He huffs a small laugh and then grabs a large case and lays it gently on the ground, opening the top to reveal a huge, dark green rifle.
"This is an Accuracy International rifle.. we've used them for a long while now, best you'll get. We can alter sights and scopes to suit you. They're quite lightweight compared to other manufacturers. In all, it's probably seven kilos - give it a try and see what you think, Love". I stare at the piece of metal as if it would jump out and attack me. "This is the L96 model.. I assume that you used a Russian SV-98 type? They're popular over there. Poor mans sniper they are, if you were good with one of them, you'll be impressive with one of these" the Captain rambles. It's all pretty pointless to be honest because I know nothing about guns. I was just thrown one by a guard and told to shoot it, and punished if I missed. You learn fast that way.
I listen to him talk anyway, enjoying the gruffness of his voice and the fact that he seemed quite interested and excited to talk about guns. I nod along as if I understand what he is saying. "Ok, Let's give it a try then, love" -he hands me the gun and stands closely behind me. "See that target over there" he points "I want you to hit that - take your time". I nod and get comfortable holding the rifle. It feels different. Foreign. I lower myself to the ground and eye up the target in the scope. I breathe in and hold my breath. One, two, click.
"Well done - slightly left but hit the target" the Captain says. I furrow my brows, confused. "Can I try again?" I ask, disappointed. He shrugs and nods. I aim again and concentrate more this time. Breathe in. Hold it. One, Two, Shoot... Fuckin' left again.. what the fuck?
"You're doin' well, Lass. Why are you pissed off. It's not like you're missing.." Johnny pipes up. I scoff at him. "It should be hitting dead center.. I don't miss, Johnny.. I can't miss like this.." I rant. "I'm trying again, I think the guns sight is off.." I get into position the same as the last two tries but this time I aim half a line further to the right of the cross hair. One, two, Click. I huff a laugh. "Got it.. I need to aim off to the right to make a clean hit. I'll get used to it.." I mumble, continuing to eye the scope and point the rifle in different directions, pretending to aim at things. "Whoa, lass. Dinnae point it at us, fuck sake" Johnny jokes as I start turning slowly towards the pack. I was totally in my own little world there.
"We can have the sight adjusted if you like?" John offers "although I doubt it's this one that's been off. I reckon the one you've learnt to shoot with is off - so you naturally drop your rest arm to allow for the difference. Have you noticed that..?" John questions. "Uhm, no.. I've only ever used that sniper rifle.. I don't really know much about guns - was just given a crash course to be honest.."
He smiles and pats the top of my head "Well you ain't half bad for just having had a crash course, love - those hits would have passed you as a sniper here anyway, yet here you are complaining that you're a couple of millimeters left of where you wanted it.." I laugh nervously and look down at my feet.
Kyle walks up beside me and removes the gun from my arms and places it gently back in its case. "Better shot than most of us, anyway.. I reckon with a bit of familiarization with the new scope, you'll out-perform LT" I immediately glance back to the ground and feel nervous, scared to feel the wrath of the Lieutenant again. I subconsciously rub my sore arm before the Captain speaks up. "I wanted to end the day with a quick five kilometer run. It'll give Laika chance to see the perimeter of the base and also good exercise for you three lazy buggers!" he jokes. Johnny clutches his chest in false offence, Kyle just laughs and walks himself over to the Captain, giving him a gentle shove. "Lazy, sir? I'm not sure about that.." I blush - was he flirting with his Alpha? I shouldn't be witnessing this. I'm not one of them.. The Captain chuckles darkly and jokingly grabs Kyle by the scruff of his neck and growls softly at him, causing the younger Alpha to groan and blush. I turn away.
Johnny just laughs along, elbowing Simon who still looks pissed off from this mornings encounter.
The gun case gets placed on the floor of the large cabinet, stood upright. The Captain goes and chats to the supervisor and takes a small paper ticket and signs something. I watch from a distance, assuming he was just signing the gun back into storage. He returns to the group and smiles "Right, get your arses in gear. Take the first km steady as the warm up, then we will see who's the fastest. Finish is back here. Full lap of the base.. no cheating, Simon". I furrow my brows again, god I do that a lot, I'm going to get a frown line if I'm not careful. The Lieutenant didn't strike me as the type to cheat on a simple jog. I shake my head and watch the others limber up and stretch. I don't join them. Just watch, confused. I only ever ran when I was forced or chased. Never for.. leisure?
"Right, Kyle - lead us off for the first few hundred meters, just to get us onto the outside loop" - "Yessir'" Kyle chirps back. He strides off quickly. I try to stay with Johnny. Simon and John jogging gently behind. I stay on Johnny's heels for a few minutes but can feel myself getting tired. He keeps looking round at me as if he is surprised I'm still that close to him. Kyle is away out in front. How does he make it look so easy?! He is barely breaking a sweat, looks like he is just floating. I guess he was the best runner of the team. Johnny runs like a man possessed. I huff a laugh, his run matches his personality. All elbows and fast movements. He looked busy but he was still fast. I glance behind to try and spot the other two Alphas.
"Dinnae' look back when you're running Lassie, you'll trip!" Johnny shouts, while running backwards. What a showoff! I scoff and roll my eyes at him before wiping the sweat from my brow. "The two big'uns are slow, lass! Too heavy to be speedy like me and Kyle.." He jokes, speeding up and slowing down. "Johnny!" I pant, struggling to talk while gasping for air "Stop showing off!" - "No, Lass - I'm impressed, you're doing well! Didn't think you'd keep up with me to be honest - Gaz ran track when he was at school, he coulda been a pro runner, fucken bullshit. He has the record on base - as if I didn't almost bust a fuckin' gut to beat him to still lose" he laughs. I glance up ahead and Kyle is barely even trying. In fact, it looks like he is on his phone.. he has slowed right down as if he is waiting for us.
I just concentrate on forcing my feet to keep hitting the ground one in front of the other. I couldn't say that I was enjoying this, but it was better than being forced or chased.. It was weirdly satisfying. My lungs were on fire but I wasn't in danger.. I was just running for the sake of it - something I never thought I'd ever manage to do again. I felt like a child in a playground. The strange nostalgic feeling helps to push the pain and fatigue away. I actually somehow manage to pick up the pace. I glance back behind me and can no longer see the two larger Alphas. Just Kyle a couple of hundred meters ahead, and Johnny about ten meters in front of me.
I fall into a relaxed state, all I could hear was my own breaths and all I concentrated on was keeping them even. In Out In Out In Out. A few meters we turn a corner and I spot the Captain and Lieutenant ahead of us all. HANG ON A FUCKIN' MINUTE - CHEATS. I speed up, as does Johnny. "Ya see that, Lass, fuckin' Cap dinnae even take his own advice. Let's get them!" He shouts back to me mischievously. I giggle and shake my head fondly, but push myself faster.
Kyle goes past them first and obviously makes a comment because Ghost gestures with his hands and John throws his head back and laughs while still jogging slowly. I don't quite hear as Johnny and I are still about fifty meters behind them. C'mon, lass - you jump Cap, I'll get Ghost.."
"Jump... wait Johnny - what do you mean...?" Johnny had already shot off and almost caught up to them. I push myself into a sprint and my face splits into a huge smile. Johnny had leapt onto Simon's Ghost's back and bundled them both to the ground. I don't quite know what came over me in the moment. I laugh and leap at John in the same style that Johnny had with Ghost. John huffs as I hit into his back and stays running for a few strides before eventually loosing his balance and falling to the ground. He rolls so that he is underneath me and takes the brunt of the fall. He grunts as his back hits the grass. I can hear Johnny cackling like a madman and then the Captain speaks from underneath me.
"Johnny's bad behavior is rubbing off on you, love.." I blush and look away, only to meet eyes with Kyle, who is smiling brightly at the scene in front of him. I decide to be very brave. I stop laughing along with Johnny and sit back on his lap and reply back playfully "Bad behavior, Sir? It wasn't us who broke our own rule of not cheating.." I trail off, feeling nervous at how he was going to take my response. He goes silent before growling. I freeze momentarily before I feel his warm arms around me. He stands easily holding my weight and drops me off in Kyle's arms. "Cheeky little thing, you are. I'll need to ask Kyle to teach you some manners, you little minx.." My face heats up and I hide in Kyle's shoulder, giggling. I look over to Johnny who is beaming even though he is pinned by the largest Alpha. Christ, the Lieutenant is massive. Something inside of me makes me whimper, thinking that Johnny is in danger. I wriggle slightly and Kyle turns me away from the scene and whispers into my ear "Simon would never hurt any of us.. trust me on that, yeah?" I whine a reply along the lines of 'mmmhmm'.
*John's POV*
Simon and I decide to treat the final run as a leisurely jog. I already knew that the two young Alphas would shoot off like bloody rockets. They always did the same. What I don't expect is for little Y/N to keep pace with Johnny. Yes, she looks like she is struggling slightly, but the girl has guts. She keeps the pace.
Simon grunts at me around half way through, says that we should meet them at the end so that they 'don't get up to any mischief'. Of course, I agree, and nod in the direction of the best short cut. My knees aren't getting any younger, after all.
Simon and I rejoin the outer perimeter, having cut the top loop out. Kyle jogs by and tells us that our cheating isn't going to go down well with Johnny. Simon tells him to 'do one, Garrick' and something about how we aren't all 'failed athletes' like him which forces a laugh to bellow from my mouth. Such a back handed compliment.
The next thing that I do not predict happening is for Johnny to fell Simon like a fuckin' tree - the boy near on rugby tackles the lad. I watch it all happen from the corner of my eye, laughing as Simon hits the deck and Johnny crawls over him. The boy is like a terrier. Insatiable and endlessly energetic. The next thing I don't reckon on happening is for Y/N to creep around my peripheral vision and leap onto my back.
It's a given, she is much lighter that Johnny, but she also carries herself with much more grace. Her 'rugby tackle' method was rather cat-like. I manage to stay upright for a few strides until her leg taps mine, causing me to trip. It was one of those falls when you know you're going down. It gives me time to spin and take the fall so that I don't land on her, or catapult her, face first, into the grass.
I land on my back and stare back up at her happy face while she is draped across my chest, clung like a Koala. Her walls were down in this moment. She is genuinely happy. I have to move heaven and earth to not grab at her. Her scent is rolling off of her - as strong and sweet as I have smelt it. Control yourself, John!
She blushes like crazy at my comment - about how Johnny is rubbing off on her. She then sasses back at me and Christ, I need to get away from her before I do something that will scare her away. But I'm a greedy man. I stand with her, not quite able to release her yet. I drop her off with sweet Kyle. He wouldn't take advantage of her like I would. I cant help myself. I make an overly sexual remark about Kyle teaching her manners. We all know it wouldn't be Kyle who taught her manners. That job is down to Simon and I. Kyle and Y/N blush, I notice that Kyle nuzzles into her neck when she hides her pretty little blush in his shoulder. Cheeky boy couldn't help himself could he?
Something changes in her expression when she looks up to see Simon pinning Johnny. Then, almost within a split second, her scent changes to a sharper, sour scent. She is scared again. Simon notices the change without even looking. I can tell by his body language. He softens his hold on the younger Alpha and leans down to scent him, Johnny laughs and nuzzles all over Simon's mask. I glance to see how Laika reacts but Kyle had already turned her away. Damn it!
When will she ever see the soft side of Simon Riley?
I take a deep breath, to try and calm myself down from the earlier excitement. As an Alpha, I hadn't had a woman - let alone a possible Omega - sitting on top of me for years now. Of course, my body reacted accordingly. Once I've successfully chilled out, I turn and step back towards a smirking Kyle and a happier Y/N.
I push the loose strands of her hair back behind her ears. "C'mon love".
She giggles and apologises for her earlier behavior. "Don't ever say sorry for having fun, love. I enjoyed seeing you like that. Even Simon chuckled at your little sassy comment.." I wiggle my eyebrows. She blushes again and looks down. She really is unsure of Simon.
I'd - We'd - need to rectify that...
- two days later -
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
Darkness, wet, blood, pain, screaming...
Another nightmare. I thought they were getting better. I cannot get myself out of this one, tossing and turning. I can feel the sweat and tears falling from my face. Was that real or just the nightmare?
*Ghost's POV*
A blood curdling scream echoes the hallway at about 1AM. I was sitting in the kitchen with my feet up on the coffee table, reading a book. I stand up immediately and follow my nose to her room. What the fuck am I supposed to do. The others are all asleep, she is fuckin' terrified of me but she is whimpering and crashing about in there. Fuck it. I'm going in. The annoying Alpha voice inside of my brain is screaming to help her. I wish it would shut the fuck up to be honest. It's been louder than ever since the second she turned up.
I bang on the door - no answer. I step into the strange room hesitantly. Stupid girl didn't even lock the door. I know that Alphas shouldn't intrude Omega's nests, but she needed help.
She isn't on the fuckin' bed. She's ran away, heard me fuckin' coming. She is hiding somewhere. Stupid fuckin' bastard - should never have come in here. She probably thinks I'm coming to kill her.
Over the sound of my thoughts, I hear another pained whimper. The cupboard. Don't tell me that she's-
She is in the fuckin' cupboard. In a fuckin' nest. A nest with Johnny and Kyle's clothes and - is that Cap's missing towel? He lost that yesterday..
I find myself staring at the sight inside of the cupboard. Probably for too long, because I'm drawn back to the situation when she starts breathing erratically.
I try to gently tap her arm. She doesn't wake up. I squeeze her arm now, she flinches, but still doesn't wake up.
"Laika.. it's - fuck - it's me.. Ghost... Wake up..." - nothing. Just more thrashing around.
"Fuckin' hell" I grumble. I lower myself so that I am knelt on the floor in the doorway of the open cupboard. I grab her shoulders and shake. It's the only option I have, having tried everything else.
She snaps out of her nightmare with a shriek, slapping and scrabbling at my chest and face. "Fuck girl - it's me.. I'm - I'm tryin to fuckin' help you" - "DON'T TOUCH ME - GET AWAY" she yells at me.
I'd be lying if my heart didn't freeze over when she says that. Such fear in her voice. Fuck it. Only option left. I grab her around the waist and hold her in one arm, flinging her over my shoulder. She is crying and crashing my back with weak, panicked punches. I hardly feel it. Too numb from her words. I march her out of her room and down the hallway. "Pl-please - please don't" she cries. What the fuck did she think I was gonna do to her?!
I reach the door I was looking for and open in, storming in and dumping her on the bed. She clambers quickly away from me, over the limbs of my pack mates. John wakes up abruptly, instantly in defense mode. She flies towards him and clings to his torso as if she fitted there all too perfectly. She is sobbing now. John growls as he blinks away sleep.
"What the fuck, Simon. What've you done..?" He looks between the sobbing mess clung to him, and me. Great, my own fuckin' Alpha thinks I've 'done' something to her.
By now Johnny and Kyle had woken up too. They move to the space between myself and the girl. Were they creating a barrier?! Didn't they trust me..? Of course they don't. You're a monster.
I sigh, feeling broken, and turn to leave the room. Christ knows where to, but I needed to disappear for a while. I'm almost out of the room. I stop when I hear her. "Si-simon..?"
I don't turn. I just face the doorway, still intending to leave.
Then the Captain speaks up "Answer her, Simon.." I sigh again.
"What?" I snap over my shoulder at her. I see her flinch, "I'm - I'm sorry.." she whines "S'fine" I grunt back, still not turning to face her.
"What happened?" Johnny asks. I don't expect to feel his hand in mine, tugging me back toward the bed. "Get off Johnny" I shake his hand away from mine, but ever persistent, he grabs at my hand again. "Si - what happened?" he asks again.
"The girl was havin' a fuckin' nightmare. Heard her screaming from the kitchen. Didn't even wake up when I banged on the door. She was hiding in her fuckin' cupboard. Didn't even lock her door".
"So.. you helped her..?" Kyle asks hesitantly "what else was I 'sposed to do? Fuckin' let her scream the place down all night?" I snap back - ok fair, that was uncalled for. I have my own fair share of nightmares. Those in glass houses 'n all that bullshit....
"S-sorry.. I didn't mean-" - "I said s'fine" I grunt at her. She hides behind John's shoulder now. She's terrified of me.
"Y/N.. what do you want to do..?" Kyle asks her "Don't want to be a-alone again.." she whimpers back at him. He strokes her cheek. Why can't I be gentle like that?
"Alpha.. can - can she stay here for tonight..?" He asks John nervously. I forgot Johnny was still holding my hand, but he squeezes it excitedly when Kyle asks if she can stay.
"Y/N.. would you feel comfortable here..? I give you my word, we will not touch you.. not hurt you..it's your choice.."
*Laika's (Y/N's) POV*
"Y/N.. would you feel comfortable here..? I give you my word, we will not touch you.. not hurt you..it's your choice.." The captain asks me.. I sniffle into his shoulder. His bare shoulder. "Please.. please, if it's ok - ok with everyone.." I stutter and sniff. "Shhh sweetheart, it's ok.." John reassures me, rubbing my back softly.
He lays me down between him and Kyle. I glance towards Johnny and Ghost. Johnny has finally succeeded in dragging Ghost into the bed. He is as far away from me as he can possibly be on the massive bed. Johnny snuggles up to him and rests his head against Ghost's chest. I can almost see some of the tension leave Ghost's body. I look away and roll to face Kyle. He is already looking at me as I turn around. He smiles softly down at me and whispers "you ok, love?" I nod against the pillow. He motions towards himself and as my eyes meet his motioning hand, I notice that he is also shirtless. Do none of these men wear a shirt to bed?!
I furrow my brows at his gesture "C'mere love, snuggle up to me" he chuckles. "I don't want to be a burden" I sniffle, my face still red and puffy from all of the crying. "Never, now come here" he motions towards himself again. "Gaz.. behave" John warns from his position behind me. "Behaving, sir" - "Better fuckin' be" he grumbles back. His voice was extra gravelly at this time of night. I shuffle towards Kyle and he engulfs me in his arms. He is so warm.. His scent calms me down almost immediately. I push my head so it's resting atop his chest. He slots his chin over the top of my head.
I drift off to sleep, quicker than I had for years. The last thing I feel is a strong, hairy arm wrap around both of us and pull us slightly closer.
79 notes · View notes
mirai-e-jump · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Animage December 2023 Issue ft. Yuzuki Hirakawa Interview (translation below)
Publication: November 10, 2023 (between episodes 35-36)
Tumblr media
"Remain Immovable"
Rita Kaniska, who rules the absolutely neutral country of Gokkan, is both the king and chief judge who passes down judgment on international criminals.
"The Law is the spear that pierces kings. The Law is the shield that protects man. For this reason, Gokkan will remain immovable."
Rita never wavers in their convictions at any time, and judges fairly according to the law.
However, just like anyone else, Rita also has a heart. They get angry at those who resell goods based on their beloved animated character "Moffun," and when their emotions get out of control, they scream in public.
When they tried to seal Grodie with the "Ice Seal," a secret sacrificial technique that's possessed within their right eye, they felt the fear of death. Still, Rita's strength lies in their determination to remain neutral and immovable as the king of Gokkan.
It must have been a positive thing for Rita to have friends who understood their way of living, were concerned about them, and tried to help them.
The current mission of the Royal Sentai, is to reclaim the countries of Chikyu that have been conquered by the Uchu Five Jesters. Goma, who rules Gokkan, is a difficult opponent, once messing around with the kings using a technique that switches bodies. What awaits Rita in the upcoming battle to reclaim Gokkan?
-I want to make use of the sword fighting skills I learned from Hachisuka-san-
"As the story progressed, the number of kings working together increased, but is there anything you're conscious of when expressing these relationships?"
Hirakawa: Basically, I try not to put my personal feelings into it, but after starting the second chapter, I feel like we're closer than ever. I'm not sure if a part of them that unconsciously feels at ease has emerged. However, I think Rita doesn't just think of them as their friends, rather, they're comrades that help protect Chikyu. When it comes to Hymeno, who is the closest to them, rather than being conscious of how I interact with her, I treat her naturally as Rita, reacting timidly to Hymeno's aggressive advances.
"We found it interesting that when they switched bodies with Yanma in episode 28, unlike the other kings, they didn't seem to become closer."
Hirakawa: Everyone else had good interactions, but we were in an interesting frame of, "Huh, what are we doing?" (laughs). In that episode, I also discussed with Director Kamihoriuchi Kazuya that among the kings, Yanma would probably enjoy being swapped the most, and that the most important thing was to enjoy the chaos of the situation. Also, I thought that if I went too hard in my approach, it would be too rough, or that it would come off as lame, so I decided to just do it naturally. The Director told me things like, "You don't have to try doing it like Yanma," so I felt like I played much more as myself
"Have you heard any feedback from Watanabe Aoto-san, who plays Yanma?"
Hirakawa: When we met up, he said, "It was alot of fun!" and "It was cool." But, Aoto's Rita was way too much (laughs). I don't really roll my eyes or cross my eyes or anything like that. "I" did that because I reached a state of maximum irritation due to the stress of being swapped…..if you think about it, could it be possible? When I saw the final cut and realized how he performed, I was surprised and asked myself, "I've been doing this?"
"What do you take into consideration when interacting with Morfonia, your retainer?"
Hirakawa: I try to be as "flat" as possible without being too overwhelming. Like in the kabedon scene in episode 25, when they want to convey their thoughts, I'm always conscious of conveying them clearly, even if it's in their own awkward way. No matter what Rita and Morfonia say to each other, they'll never leave each other, as they know that their relationship won't change, so I feel like they're not hesitant about it.
"Have you had any memorable interactions with Yuichi Hachisuka-san, PapillonOhger's Suit Actor?"
Hirakawa: We usually film separately from each other, so I share information with Hachisuka-san whenever we meet. He incorporates what I talk to him about into his actions after the transformation. When we're fighting unmasked, he's always by the camera man's side, giving me friendly and detailed advice. We also have alot of small talk that's unrelated to acting, so I'm very grateful that he's so open and friendly with me.
"In terms of unmasked action, we think that episodes 32 and 33 depicted some pretty intense action scenes."
Hirakawa: That's right. It was the first time in the second chapter that I had to fight unmasked, and there were quite alot of moves. Rita's fighting style is not to attack the enemy themself, but to cut them down as the enemies approach them, so sword fighting skills are important. It's important to have a sense of balance between stopping your movements and applying force, and Hachisuka-san taught me alot not only during action practice, but also on the set. I've always loved to move my body, and even before King-Ohger I participated in a few practice sessions for action scenes and became interested in it. Hachisuka-san taught me the basics of how to hold, swing, and draw out the sword, and I'd like to continue challenging myself even after King-Ohger is over.
-Overflowing emotions between my mission and fear-
"The cast members of King-Ohger are actively engaged on SNS, but we have the impression that Hirakawa-san especially has frequent opportunities to interact with the fans."
Hirakawa: I'm conscious of doing something on SNS every day. I belong to LDH, which is famous as an artist agency, and their artists have many opportunities to directly interact with their supporters at things such as live performances and release events. However, the acting team doesn't have many opportunities like that, so I wanted to create a place to interact with the fans, so I use the Twitter space to talk and stream on Instagram Live. Also, I wanted to give people a chance to get to know me through Rita. I'm glad that the fans enjoy the gap between me and Rita.
"I see. It sounds like you had some deep thoughts and were communicating them."
Hirakawa: Well, I've always liked talking, so when I'm home alone, I sometimes start saying, "I'm kinda bored," or "I'll talk for abit" (laughs). I feel that I've become better at speaking since I've started streaming, and that my thinking is faster than before. Up until now, I haven't had many opportunities to communicate with the fans, so when I read their comments, it was encouraging to realize that there were so many people who supported me.
"Other than Rita, if you had to name your favorite character, who would it be?"
Hirakawa: Since playing him in the body swap episode, I feel attached to Yanma. I've always wanted to play a role with that kind of cool feel and slightly rough tone. Also, I guess I'd say Gira. I think his charm lies in that he's straightforward, honest, and cute, but the anger he shows and the feelings he has for his friends is also appealing. His face is looking more and more like that of a king, and in episode 29, there's even an effect where lights rush from his eyes, which was super cool!
"Please tell us about some of the most memorable episodes so far."
Hirakawa: In episode 30, the secret of Rita's right eye was revealed, and the culprit behind the "Wrath of God" was revealed to be Grodie, which still leaves an impression on me. I didn't know about the secret of their right eye, so I was surprised when I read the script. Grodie is played by Amano Kousei-san, who is a senior at my agency, and he also performed in Kamen Rider (played Sakuya Tachibana/Kamen Rider Garren in Kamen Rider Blade), so I have fond memories of being able to co star with him.
"Shiono Akihisa-san, who plays Souji Rippukan (Kyoryu Green) in episodes 32 and 33, also comes from the same agency."
Hirakawa: Yes. Shortly after being chosen to play Rita, I happened to have the opportunity to meet Shiono-san in another production, where I told him that I would be appearing in Sentai. I was very happy to be able to work together in the collaboration episodes, with Shiono-san encouraging me with, "Do you best."
"Going back to episode 30, we think it was a major turning point from Rita's perspective."
Hirakawa: The relationship with Karras, the previous king, was explored in depth, and Rita's actions towards their mission and determination to protect their people was depicted, which I thought was cool to play. For the scenes where Rita's emotions were overflowing, I wanted to express them in advance, and wanted to express them within the atmosphere of the scene. The scene where Karras collapsed in front of my eyes was so powerful, that I was surprised at how much emotion I felt inside of me and how much it moved me. The scene where they use the "Ice Seal" on Grodie is especially emotional. It's a secret technique that seals away both yourself and your opponent, so using it will lead to Rita's death. Rita is conflicted between their duty as a king to protect their people, and their fear of dying. I played the role imagining those feelings, but since I had never experienced the loss of a loved one, it became so overwhelming, that I couldn't stop crying during filming, and had to be given time to calm down.
"You played the part with a great amount of emotion."
Hirakawa: When I read the script, I often write down what I'm thinking of at that moment, but for the scene where I use the secret technique, I wrote, "I leave the rest to you." Then, when it came time to perform, I imagined everyone's faces…..I thought, "I don't want to die," and "But" and I cried not only as Rita, but also as Yuzuki Hirakawa (laughs). By deciding to protect the lives of their people and the peace of Chikyu more than their own life, Rita was able to grow even more, and when Hymeno stopped them, I feel that they were able to firmly realize that they were not alone.
"Finally, please tell us about some future highlights."
Hirakawa: In episode 36, Rita will do some interesting things in the scenes regarding Hymeno's marriage matchmaking, but I think episode 38 will be the main highlight for Rita. Filming is about to begin (at the time of this interview), so I know I have to do my best......I really hope everyone will look forward to it (laughs). _
Question to Kaku So-san! (Kaguragi Dybowski's Actor)
Kaguragi often goes to different places alone, like infiltrating other places, without anyone noticing. I'm curious to know how he manages to stay out of everyone's sight with such a large body. I also want to know how he takes care of his long hair. If you look closely, Kaguragi's hair is quite smooth. It's actually a wig, but I'd like to hear Kaku-san's interpretation of how Kaguragi takes care of his smooth hair. (-Hirakawa)
Questions from Murakami Erica-san! (Hymeno Ran's Actor)
Q: What kind of food does Rita like? If you were to make a Gokkan coat for Hymeno, what would you propose?
I have a feeling that Rita likes sweet things. I personally like wagashi, so I think they'd appreciate that (laughs). A coat that's a dress with her legs showing would look cold, so it should be like a poncho and worn over the top. I think a long coat with a hood would be nice. A fluffy white ball (snowman) coat, or a kamikiri (mantis) coat! (-Hirakawa)
180 notes · View notes
lizhly-writes · 7 months ago
Text
staring at my sqh/yqy peak lord fiance ficlet. consider this! sqh is still consorting with demons while this happens because why not. mobei-jun still exists and is fully aware of the whole "haha i'm engaged to my shixiong and everything is so fucking weird" and sqh is muttering about this as he looks through some northern desert stuff.
it's just. come on, yue-shixiong. we're engaged, you don't have to keep chasing after your xiao jiu -- not that sqh minds!!! if you two get along, great, that's everything that great airplane god wanted! but like, it gets really awkward when you run away while you're on a date with lil ole shang qinghua, and then everyone starts feeling very sorry for sqh for having a fiance so obviously in love with another man, which, okay, sqh absolutely took advantage of to get paperwork done at first, but it's starting to get wayyyyy more awkward now --
mbj finds himself in the wonderful position of being able to give sqh dating advice. does mbj date? no. but does he know what dating looks like? hell yeah. it seems a shame that his best spy/advisor/friend(?) doesn't know the answer to this.
"hit him," mbj suggests.
"what," sqh says.
"three times a day."
and then we get into a discussion on demon courting and sqh going "haha that's nice but yqy isn't a demon" and mbj is like "i don't understand why you don't try it, how else are you going to get his attention".
"humans don't court by punching people???"
"you don't appear to be making any progress doing this the human way." and mbj says this super condescendingly, too. like hey, sqh, you're such a loser. you have no game. of course you have no bitches. how can you have bitches if you don't punch people in the face.
well, yeah?? fuck you too, my king! it's not like you've ever had a date, are you not launching a boulder while being precariously balanced on your glass peak (me: i'm paraphrasing bu-ding-talk, check them out)? sqh could totally make progress if he wants to! not that he wants to! who wants to make progress with yqy??
anyway, this gets buried until the next time yqy pays sqq too much attention and sqh had the most resigned fucking look on his face. like come on. this again?
lqg is there. sqh makes incredibly awkward small talk. like haha hey how's your engagement to sqq. good? bad? ahahaha yeah, actually, sqh didn't have to ask, obviously it's bad. look, our fiances are running away with each other. people keep telling sqh that he needs to keep yue-shixiong's attention somehow, but all the advice is weird. in fact this guy last week said that sqh should hit yqy three times a day, not that sqh is going to try that --
"hmm," says lqg. "that's not a bad idea."
sqh is abruptly reminded that he is talking to lqg, a man who probably would be more interested in people if they punched him in the face.
"is that what you're doing with sqq???" says sqh.
the answer is no, of course not, don't be dumb. but like, if sqq WASN'T a poisonous snake of a man and a decent human being, lqg would mayhaps have his interest piqued with a good fight. that's so much better than flowers and haircombs. who wants courting gifts when you can have a good punch in the face.
"hahaha thanks liu-shidi but maybe not i think yue-shixiong could probably kill me if i tried," says sqh and scurries away.
fast-forward a week or two, in which sqh is having a stressful time. maybe it's tax season. maybe it's a shitty night hunt that he has no business being on. either way, yqy is there with him and good god is yqy zoned out.
is yqy actually zoned out? eh, maybe not. perhaps he is actually fully paying attention, but also he takes a look at a stand for fans while sqh is talking to him and sqh is like "shit, is this sqq again?" exasperation turning into anger while sqh is just, super stressed, and he just needs yqy to pay attention to him just this once, and the thought occurs -- well, at least two separate people have told him that he just needs to hit yqy --
all this to say that sqh just fucking decks yqy
115 notes · View notes
spideyhexx · 11 months ago
Note
Still on the topic arranged marriage with Coryo, do you think the first time would come naturally as Coryo and his wife get closer or it would come from like people saying like they must ‘perform their duties’, and it’d be a little awkward at first and then they could get comfortable??
I can see both scenarios, so let's talk about both.
I think it coming naturally would probably make most sense, but it also depends on your dynamic with Coryo.
If you guys had a distaste for each other despite the fact you're in an arranged marriage, there's a possibility that you end up getting to know each other intimately before you're even married. Something would just snap one day and your arguing and bickering turned in rough fucking and loud moans. But then as time progresses and you're officially married, it becomes more personal than that.
On the flip side, if you and Coryo were fond of one another, there could have been a moment before your marriage to him where you. both give in to desire. But this isn't just pure lust, it's a true yearning for one another.
If you guys didn't like one another and haven't touched intimately by the time you're married, I think there would still be some sort of desire between the two of you, but neither of you want to be the first to give into that. And maybe tabloids and your high society friends would start to ask when you're gonna have a baby and the question always sends both you and Coryo into an awkward frenzy of saying, "we're trying," but you're not. I don't think you guys would fully give in to the societal pressures, but it would make things more awkward between you two when you're getting ready for bed.
You'd become more tolerant of one another, used to kissing for photographs and sleeping in the same bed, and Coryo would make the first move, but he'd go about it respectfully because he hates to admit it, but he's pretty nervous.
He'd give you a whole romantic dinner, just the two of you, away from any of the house workers and then you'd be back in bed with him. Every touch is hesitant and the kisses are exploratory, seeing what the other likes.
It would take a bit to shred each layer of clothing and Coryo likes how you check in with him just as much as he checks in with you. It's a little confusing to you both. Your feelings are jumbled. While you may not hate each other as much as you might've previously, it's confusing to watch Coryo touch you so gently and seem to care that you're okay.
Coryo would make it clear that he wants you to feel good and he means it so much more once he sees how you act when you're pleasured.
let's chat about coryo, here :)
256 notes · View notes
urf1lterr · 2 years ago
Text
lovesick | pedro pascal [1]
Tumblr media
"and on this night and in this light i think im falling, im falling for you."
next chapter: [2] series masterlist
summary: in which a 1975-obsessed film student accidentally falls in love with an older man she can't have.
pairing: actor!pedro x intern!reader
genre: acting world!au, big age-gap!, strangers to friends- maybe lovers?? au | angst, mature, awkward, love- eventually
word count: 7.4k
status: in progress
author's note: this was supposed to only be an introduction but i ended up with a chapter lol. im sorry if its lame, i wrote this half asleep and for fun. not edited btw
"So like...are we gonna keep staring at the door or do you mind if I open it and walk inside?"
Swiftly turning your neck, you glared at your friend who was patiently waiting for your reply- probably begging on the inside to go in by how badly cold it was outside on this tuesday, new york morning.
"Just go inside by yourself!" you rolled your eyes as she shook her head.
"Uh no, for one- I can't let you be out here alone, some man could just push you in a van and sell you to the black market," Jules declared. "then I would lose one birthday gift from you-"
"I will push you in the van myself if you keep talking," you groaned, her constant rambling within the hours making your nerves worsen.
Today was the day Jules, your best friend, and you began your internship on a film set. Actually, it was yesterday, but nobody really counts the short orientation and hours of reading rules and responsibilities a real productive work day, right?
If having the worst anxiety wasn't enough, you were blessed to have been given an amazing coping mechanism of meditation- in which would've been fine with if you didn't look like a complete idiot standing up with your eyes wide open breathing slowly.
But to be fair, this really was your first day on the job. You didn't know what to expect and your friend wasn't exactly a helping hand in these situations. As she was more confident and outgoing, there you were being an introverted, awkward female with amazing music taste- that is you ever felt comfortable to let people hear your music outside of your headphones.
"I don't get just why you have to pray while staring at the door as if you wanna stare into its soul, you look weird," Jules whined, placing her hand over her eyes. "We have to be at Finn's office in 10 minutes or else we're dead."
"Fine," you huff, grabbing your bag you had placed on the floor beforehand onto your shoulder. "Let's go."
Excitedly clapping her hands together, she swung the door open before dragging you down the hall of the room towards the elevators. The two of you had to meet at a studio on the other side of the city for this internship in which wouldn't be a problem if you enjoyed traffic and the crowds of people on the street- but you didn't.
Not only did you have to take the subway and a cab one hour before your schedule 8am start, you had to deal with the troubles of waking up your night owl roommate, Jules again, without slapping her silly by how strong her eyes stay shut.
After getting off the elevators and walking closer to his office, you recognized a couple of the other interns standing around his door looking either extremely nervous, tired- or both.
Suddenly, the door opened and Finn, the man who hired you, jumped out with a bright smile.
It's way too early to be this energetic.
"How is everyone doing on this lovely, working morning?" Finn smiled, making sure to make eye-contact with every single person in the hall before continuing on with his dialogue. "I'll take this silence as a way you all express your gratitude to be able to work on a live set."
With the ongoing silence still occurring, Finn continued with, "please follow me to the room next door, that's where we'll discuss minor details before heading towards the stages."
The minor details were simple, don't screw up.
There was also little insights on what we should be prepared for- taking care of the cast and errands as the day went on.
I suppose experience is what is needed for your future so it shouldn't be a surprise that you wouldn't be around a camera for too long. But it was mentioned that overtime you would accelerate your learning to harder tasks such as on-hands work, which you were terrified over but within time you would get over it.
You had to, this was a part of your dream job after all.
The group was informed more about the project we had to assist, some new show coming out called 'The Last of Us.' To be honest, you weren't familiar with it. Some of the guys in the group threw in their input that they played the game, but you didn't know it was also a combined franchise.
You weren't exactly a gamer or horror film person.
It hadn't even come to your mind that you would be interacting with real-life celebrities until you made near a stage and felt Jules grip your wrist hard and start tugging on it to get your attention as she tried to quiet her fan girl squeals.
Looking up, you saw a group of people walking through a set with papers in their hand, laughing and chatting with one another. Truth be told, you didn't recognize any of them. Maybe you should have done more research regarding this show you know nothing about- but you heard some successful directors had openings for extra help and immediately called your friend to join with.
"Is it bad that I don't recognize any of these people?" you whisper to Jules as she screeches in low volume, shocked that you would dare say that.
"You're joking right?!" she whispers with a high-pitched voice. "Everybody knows them! They are-"
"Is that him?" you heard a girl whisper from your group, Jules stopping her almost-started rant from it. "He really is daddy."
"What the fuck?" you heard one of the guy interns whisper in confusion, looking at her as if she was delusional as she waved her hand to him to not distract her from her view.
You weren't sure who she was talking about and you really didn't want to know. She probably had some silly crush on one of the actors which would just distract her from her job, it isn't worth it.
"Yo man, why is there a line of people looking like they are held at gunpoint?" one person laughed, pointing at your group as you tried to hold back your laughter.
You were assuming the people around you guys were majority of the cast as nobody else but the camera and makeup crew were present in the room. Surprisingly enough, even after seeing them closer you still couldn't figure out who any of these actors were.
Were you really that outdated in the films you watched?
"Way to introduce yourself, Gabriel," Finn replied, giving a pat on his back before turning back to the group. "These are the new interns because you know, you guys made the last ones quit."
"Uh no I didn't, that was all Nick!" you heard a small child gasp, pointing at an older looking man. He looked a little familiar but you couldn't wrap your head around it. "He made them pick up his food orders all the way across town everyday!"
The familiar-looking man had longer hair than most of the men around. "I would've done delivery if that was an option!" The man complained, making the girl scoff in return.
Hold on, you knew that voice. You grew up with that voice.
"Wait, I do know somebody, that's Ron Swanson" you gasped, completely forgetting how loud and clear you were in your surroundings by how fazed out you were to be a few feet away from a comedic legend.
You didn't know all eyes were on you until you felt Jules heavy weight of her shoulders hit yours as she hid her face in embarrassment from your last statement causing you to look up. Everybody tried holding back their giggles as Nick just smiled proudly.
Great, you just exposed how you didn't know them in front of them. Not mortifying at all.
"Funny and smart for knowing me, I like her already," you heard Nick proudly declare, turning to Finn with a firm nod. "You better not fire her."
Feeling your face getting hotter by the second, you wished you could just hide under a blanket and stay in there forever if it meant you never had to embarrass yourself like that again. This probably looked so disreputable on your part.
"And what might this oblivious, tomato be named?" you heard a man curiously question, getting your attention by his big framed glasses on his face.
Did he just call you a fruit?
"Be nice, you're intimidating them. It's like a new fish in a big pond," an older woman responded after, trying to bring some extra comfort into the room but it was too late- you were traumatized.
"Okay, okay," the man held up his hand in defense before turning to look at you straight in the eye. "What might this unaware, cherry tomato be named? That sounds cuter."
"Uh, y/n," you awkwardly stated, holding your hands together while terribly trying to defend yourself. "And it's totally not like I didn't recognize the rest of you!" you lie, pointing at a random person next to him before speaking up again, "you're in that one brilliant movie that was so good!"
The man sheepishly smiled at you before saying, "I am just one of the cameramen, but thank you. I do get told quite a bit that I look like Brad Pitt." And that was the moment you wanted to die inside.
That's it, you're never coming back here again. You've made a fool out of yourself.
"Stop talking," you heard your friend hiss before taking a step forward to help lessen the attention on you. "I am Jules. Not fashionable like the one from Euphoria, but still very friendly and fun."
The cast all waved at her from her radiating charm that could make anyone adore her. "Thank you, Jules who isn't from Euphoria, why don't everyone else introduce themselves."
After everyone had their time to shine, you were excused for a small break as rehearsal had yet to start. You weren't complaining, you would rather be out getting coffee on the other side of town if that meant you could avoid the actors and directors at all times.
Sitting on one of the break room's couches, you felt Jules jump next to you before hitting your shoulder rapidly. "I think that one girl intern hates you!"
Trying hard to remove her fast hands off you, you gave her a confused look. "Uh why? Was it because I embarrassed us?"
There couldn't be any other reason why she might dislike you, it's not like you knew her personally or had ever met her before the last few days.
"I mean Pedro did call you cute minutes after she called him 'daddy', what do you expect?" She giggled as you gave her a disgusted glance at the last term she used. Why would she call him that and feel comfortable saying it so freely? "She's in loveeee with him."
Pedro? So that was his name.
"First of all, he doesn't think I'm cute. The name 'cherry tomato' was cute rather than a hillbilly tomato," you defended, making her scrunch her face in confusion by your nonsense. "Second, there's no way a normal woman would be that upset over one small indirect comment not made in that way."
Jules rolled her eyes by how understanding you weren't being, it annoyed her even more how oblivious- like the man had said, you were being. "He called you a cherry tomato because it has an adorable ring to it for a cute person! Therefore, he finds you pretty- end of story."
"I am beginning to think you really are delusional."
"All I am saying is be careful," she whispers seriously. "She's young and I know a lot of people who obsess over him for his looks."
"Why? He's like in his 40s-"
"Daddy issues? Gray facial hair? I have no clue what people enjoy on their free time," Jules cut you off, shrugging while you snickered. Like you never heard that excuse before.
"Can we check out the set though? I'm feeling better and want to be out there to prove how unaffected I am from earlier- but I will be hiding behind your back."
"As always," she sang, following you out the door back to the main room.
Walking out, you were determined to stay focused and think before you said something silly- which was hard. Your whole life you've always been a little dumb when reading the environment, that's not gonna change within a few minutes.
Looking through the racks of costumes, tables filled with devices you had never seen before, and cameras that were bigger than yourself, one of the interns, Joon, came up to Jules and you to inform that it was time to actually 'work.'
"Damn, I kinda liked just walking around and doing nothing but stare at the lights. Now we have to get our hands dirty for minimum wage," Jules sighed as the two of you walked in front of one of the stages.
The stage was practically empty, only a few white walls installed and chairs scattered around.
After a few minutes of hearing one of the lead director's assistant discuss the plan of going over a few scenes, it came to your realization that this was only a rehearsal.
It made sense, this building wasn't necessarily a 'survival mode" vibe. Maybe a few indoor scenes would do the job, but it wouldn't be enough for the series.
"I want you to run along with Kendall to grab some snacks, go around the room and see what we're missing and restock!" Finn brightly smiled to Jules before turning to you. "Now, what should I do with you?"
Man, you wished you could replace Kendall right now because now you were alone
"She can help me with the makeup," a lady spoke up from a few feet away. She was a very tall, black-haired woman with a few facial piercings who looked like she was in her middle 20s. "We still need to practice to see how it'll look on the screen this week"
Finn looked at you and back at her before shrugging and nodding. "Works for me." He was already walking away before he turned back around, "but don't let her apply too much, I don't want them looking caked up in front of the camera." Lightly scoffing, you made your way to the girl as he walked away.
Standing there in discomfort, you waited for her to lead you in any type of direction to make this task go by quicker. Makeup was not your thing, or at least when it came to doing someone else's.
"I'm Violet, by the way," the girl smiled kindly at you as she handed you a black apron. "You must be y/n."
Taking the apron, you opened it to find in white writing 'TLOU Crew.' "How'd you know? Did me not knowing the cast spread that fast "
Giggling, she shook her head. "Yes and no," she grabbed one of her many make up bags and began looking through it. "Your name tag."
Looking down, you forgot they had written your name on the sticker during the short-lived meeting with Finn. Redness filled your face as you averted your eyes somewhere else, too embarrassed to make eye-contact.
"Anywho," Violet chuckled while putting one hand on her hip. "I thought maybe I could do my normal routine while you can just do the small stuff like brush their eyebrows or hair."
Squinting your eyes, you just gave her a confused look. "Brush their eyebrows? Work with their hair? Isn't the eyebrows fairly too easy for you to need the help and don't you guys have certified hairstylists?"
"Would you rather do more complicated things like taking their never-ending customized coffee orders?" She replied, making you immediately reject the idea. "I volunteered you to help me because I feel like working on harder tasks your first day would only be stressful."
How thoughtful of her.
"Plus, today's not a complicated schedule-," she added as she began lining her brushes around her small table. "-think of it as a practice run over a few lines, but for multiple scenes. We probably have like max 5 people I need to work on so no need for many artists."
There was another older lady in the other side of the table on her phone, probably another experienced makeup artist who knew the drill.
"Got it, today is a light day," you responded back, causing her to smile and hand you a hairbrush.
"See, you have the right mindset," she declared, nudging her head to the side. "And you better keep it because you have your first clients coming in."
Eyes widening, you swiftly twisted your body to see two young girls and Nick come in. Three people, that shouldn't be hard.
"You better make me look adorable," Nick pointed a finger at you as he sat down on a chair near you, causing you to let out a shy laugh as Violet motioned you to come closer.
"I'm going to prep his skin, go to Bella and Nico and ask them to do the same," she advised. "They usually do it themselves on these days to make the process faster."
Nodding you walked to the two young girls, not knowing which was who. The girls were chatting with each other before one with big curls noticed your presence before smiling brightly. "Skin routine, huh? Don't worry, we were about to begin."
Immediately, you noticed her beautiful accent that caused you to stare at her in shock.
"Looks like you frightened her," the other girl laughed, making you glance at her right after. They both had the strong accent.
"Sorry!" you blush, trying to avert your eyes away from them. "I just never heard a British accent- or at least one in person before."
The first girl giggled, waving her hand as a way to prove she didn't mind. "We get that all the time when we visit, it's okay- I never really hear your accent unless I am working on a new project."
"I don't have an accent- you have one," you declare, causing them to laugh harder.
"You seem really amazed by it, is it because you fantasize over Harry Potter or something?" the second girl jokingly questioned, making you chuckle.
"I wish, but I only watched one of his movies and never read the books," you sigh before continuing. "But one of my favorite bands are British so I just get a little loss for words whenever I hear one. It's such a beautiful tone- not to be weird or anything!"
"I agree, New Yorker's just sound so...angry," the first girl shivered. "Which band are you into? Maybe we know them"
"The 1975-"
"Aww, did you do your research on me to make up for earlier," you heard a voice boost through the area. Turning around, you noticed it was the man who called you a tomato, Pedro.
He gave you a cheeky smirk with a look in his eyes as if he knew torturing you will never get old- unless of course you started crying.
"No, you idiot-," the second girl rolled her eyes as he sent her a playful glare for the insult. "-she's talking about the band."
"Wait, you were born in 1975?" you lightly asked, your mind all scrambled in your heard trying to figure out how old he would be now. "that m-
"Yes, I am old!" Pedro fake cried, holding his heart with his hand. "You don't need to remind me that these wrinkles will never go away."
"Well if you had a prepped your skin throughout the years your skin would have been as smooth as a baby's butt like mine," you heard Nick comment from his chair, eyes closed as Violet just laughed in agreement while applying sunscreen on his face.
Pedro just rolled his eyes as the first girl began talking again. "By the way, I love the 1975! Never seen them live though, but they are definitely on my playlists."
You smiled, already feeling comfortable within the environment. Maybe being alone wasn't going to be that terrible.
"I heard he makes out with fans during his concerts," the second girl scrunched her nose in disgust. "Isn't he worried he would end up catching something."
"He probably gets check ups all the time, Bella," the first girl commented, or you suppose Nico since you now know which one was Bella.
"I would catch any disease if it meant I got to kiss Matty Healy for five seconds," you replied, causing the girls to stare at you in astonishment that you just said that so freely.
Maybe talking about your favorite band is slowly making you more confident?
You heard Violet let out a loud laugh as Nick disagreed, saying something about how young girls are too adventurous nowadays but it was true. Matt Healy was a very attractive man whose kiss could probably heal heartaches.
"Isn't he like in his 30s? Aren't you a little too young to be kissing an older man like him?" Violet questioned, making you shrug.
"Maybe I have a thing for older men."
"Wouldn't call a guy who constantly makes out with fans a man," Pedro snorted. "That's a boy."
Nick hummed in agreement as you suppressed a laugh. "How old are you anyway?"
Standing up straight you stared at him and he did the same back. "Guess."
"That never ends up good," Violet chuckled before examining you up and down. "But 18."
Shaking your head, you were young but not that young. At least your skin still made you look like a teenager, god bless.
"25," Bella answered in which you denied that as well.
"29" Nico tried but was wrong.
Nick sat up from his seat to really figure out your age before easily answering "32" and becoming shocked when you denied it. "Woah, are we at least going in the right direction?"
"Violet was headed there."
Pedro sat up in shock at your response. "You're a teenager?!"
"Would it be so wrong if I was?" you questioned. "I would love to live longer."
"She's 21," the other makeup artist who was long forgotten during this conversation casually spoke up, eyes lifting from her phone. The rest of us just stared at her as she did the same back, confused. "What? She fantasizes over an older man but is doing an internship- sounds like what every 21 year-old does."
Gasping, you held a hand over your mouth as everyone laughed at how accurate she was. She was indeed right, but you wouldn't necessarily call your crush on Matty Healy a fantasy- just a strong imagination of being his lifelong lover that would probably never happen because he doesn't know you exist.
"She's right, huh" Nico spoke up as she noticed you didn't fight back.
"Sadly."
After that whole fiasco trying to find out your real age, Violet began working on Pedro after she finished with Nick. Nico and Bella were almost done with their makeup with the other artist when Violet called you over.
Walking towards the chair, you noticed that she had already finished his base with an extremely natural look, not wanting to add too much or it wouldn't look realistic.
"Can you brush his brows and apply some powder on places that need it? I need to finish Bella off with a few final touches," Violet asked, in which you nodded as she pointed to the products needed to do so. "Don't worry if you mess up, it doesn't need to be perfect."
That didn't make you feel any better.
Standing awkwardly as she walks off, you searched around her overload of makeup table to grab the items she just pointed at.
You decided to do his eyebrows first which would be extremely weird because you've never done this before- or at least to a man.
Surprisingly, Pedro hadn't teased you at all since you arrived by his side to help. He actually just laid there silent and watched Violet direct you through her moves before she left.
Maybe he was cutting you a break for once.
You were proven wrong when you leaned forward and aimed your hand towards his face before he quickly tried biting your hand, causing you to squeal and drop the brush on his face, jumping back.
"Very unprofessional," he declared, picking up the brush that had fallen down from his face to his neck up before looking up at you. "Do you hit all of your clients?'
"You did that on purpose!" you glared, smacking his arm as he sent you a playful wink.
"And what are you gonna do about it? Tell on me?" he teased until you grabbed the brush from his hands and swiped it across his brows hard, causing him to hiss in pain. "God damn, woman!"
Laughing as he gripped his forehead area, he gave you a dirty look as you begin the process of patting his face, even hitting his face a little harder than usual in some spots to make sure you got your revenge.
Once done, you examined his face to make sure you were pleased with the results- in which you were.
"All done?' Violet asked, walking up beside you, checking out your work. "Nicely done, but why does he look grumpy?" she added, as he huffed. "and why is he holding his face?"
"Who knows?" you shrug as Pedro scoffs, watching you walk away as Violet calls out afterwards that you were free to go.
As you were walking back to find where the rest of the interns were, you turned your head to find Pedro's eyes still on yours. You gave him an evil smirk as he pointed his finger at you before swiping his thumb across his neck.
You giggled, about to respond back but you were interrupted when a hand tapped your shoulder. Turning around, you find that it was two of the interns, Joon and the girl who was supposedly in love with Pedro, her name tag claiming she was Kendall.
Was this the girl that Jules went did her errands with? Most likely.
"Are you done with the makeup? We need help arranging the equipment for what's gonna be used today," Joon softly smiled as Kendall just stared at you with no emotion.
Nodding, you followed after them as they walked towards the other side of the set. Soon, you had forgotten about the actor and your little battle as endless wires and heavy weights distracted you.
It wasn't till you physically couldn't bare holding the strong stands that the three of you were told you could take a lunch break. Pulling out your phone, you hadn't realized half the day had went by with all the work you were too engaged in.
"You wanna grab lunch with us? We were thinking about going to this small cafe down the street, the reviews look great," Joon asked as Kendall just sent you a small nod in agreement.
The three of you got along pretty well during the hours you spent together. You feel closer to Joon as he did talk the most, but Kendall did try to start little talks so it wouldn't be weird.
I mean we all kind had to get along in order for this job to work.
"I would but I should look for my friend-"
"I think she had her lunch already, I saw her walking by earlier eating a burrito," Kendall replied. Of course she ate already.
Going over the idea in your head a few times, you nodded. You were starving and you suppose its better to not be a loner right now. "Why not?"
As the three of you walked through the set, you didn't miss some of the glances you guys received as your footsteps were pretty loud. It looked like they were wrapping up on one of the scenes as the director was in deep focus on whatever he was lecturing to them on.
"I hope you guys like walking because I took a cab here," Joon chuckled, causing you to laugh.
"Don't worry, I did the same."
Putting on your big coat, you waited until Kendall was done tying the scarf around her neck before walking towards the exit. Close to the door, you halted when you heard someone call your name.
"Y/n!" you saw Bella jogging towards you making Joon and Kendall freeze their movements.
Shifting slowly, you gave her a curious look. "Yes?"
"We wanted to know if you wanted to have lunch with us?" she smiled before looking behind you to find the two others. "You guys can come too!"
Swinging your arms in front of you, you reject her offer as fast as she asked you. "Oh no, no- I'm all good," you decline, not wanting to feel like a bother. "You guys enjoy your own thing-"
"C'mon, how else are we gonna tease Pedro if you aren't there to get him riled up first?" she chuckled as you felt your face on fire.
"Maybe next time?" you kindly suggest, watching as she pouts but nods.
Lifting her right hand up, she sways it around. "Alright, but don't be surprised if Pedro haunts you because of this."
"Why would he?" you heard Kendall quickly question, making Bella tilt her head at her fast counter.
"Because he's the one who asked me to invite her-." Bella casually states before turning to you. "-which you declined so I hope he teases you all week for leaving Nico and I hanging."
Ignoring the first part of her last statement, you playfully nudge her before waving your goodbyes as she skips back to the rest of the cast. Beginning your walk to the cafe, the three of you had little talk about where you grew up, which schools you attended, and why you wanted to work for the film industry.
If it weren't for the freezing temperatures you would say you really enjoyed the walk, too bad you couldn't.
It wasn't until you were seated that Kendall decided to speak her mind on what she was really curious about:
You.
"So, I wonder why Pedro specifically asked you to join him for lunch and not the rest of us?" she randomly revealed as you were taking a sip of your coffee, almost choking on it once you heard her clearly. "Do I sense favoritism?"
Joon stifled a laugh, shaking his head at her last comment. "Doubt it, but I did wonder the same thing until I realized she did help with their makeup. That's intimate enough to make her at some level close to them."
You don't really know Kendall but she's been decent enough to be around until the cast comes to mind. Maybe she wants to be close to them? You're not sure, maybe Jules was right about her all along- who knows.
What you did know though was she was very quick to question and jump to conclusions.
"What did you even talk to them about?" Kendall eyed you, making you tense up a bit. She is very intimidating when she's curious.
"Nothing much-,' you shrug, messing with the napkin in front of you. "Mainly about the 1975 since the girls are British."
"You like the 1975?" Joon asked and you nodded. "I love them!"
Ears perking up after hearing this, you smiled hard. This new information just made Joon 10x better.
"I don't know who they are," Kendall intervened, trying to find some voice in the topic.
The rest of the hour was filled with Joon and you playing the 1975's albums to Kendall as she tried her best to hide her annoyance by shoving her food in her face.
She was definitely not a fan of talent.
Going back to work was a bit easier than before after finding comfort with a lot of the people around you. The three of you were still stuck doing the same job as you heard some of the other interns were either picking up props needed for a scene or being a personal assistant to Finn.
In fact, you hadn't seen many people as rehearsal was moved to another building on the lot. Another hour or two went by before Finn went up to Joon and you to cut you for the day.
"At least we don't have to stay late," Joon beamed, taking off the gloves he was wearing before folding them back into his little backpack. "I heard he's making some people stay till 6 for some heavy-lifting duties- thank god I wasn't chosen."
"Why? Because you aren't strong enough?" you laughed as he let out a small gasp in offense.
"To think we were becoming best friends," he pouted. "But I had a back injury over a year ago so they can't really make me lift anything more than 30 pounds."
Feeling bad for teasing him, you immediately tried taking back your horrible joke. "I didn't mean t-"
"It's cool, no need to beg for forgiveness," he smiled. "Just a little something I don't tell many people, it isn't a big deal majority of the time."
Throwing a weak- but sincere smile, you nod along. Sure it wasn't a big deal right now, but later it could get worse. You didn't want him to know you felt bad but you assumed he knew by the pity upon your face.
Waving your goodbyes, you texted Jules to figure out where she was. It was a strange feeling not seeing each other all day despite working in the same building, but you did live together so it wasn't like you were missing much.
Finding her fake laughing at some guy's joke, her eyes met yours once you appeared by the door of the break room. Immediately, she patted the young boy who didn't look a day over 18 on the back before skipping happily towards you.
"I take it you had a fun day?"
"The best," she grinned, flipping a piece of hair behind her back. "I finally know what an affogato is- it really isn't that amazing as it sounds though. Just a shot of espresso poured on top of a drink."
Laughing, both of you continued down the hall in hopes of quickly finding a cab to take you to the subway. With the timing of your release, you were sure there was going to be so much traffic out these doors that you weren't ready to deal with.
Swinging the exit door open, you didn't expect to find Joon waiting outside with his hands in his pockets, looking down the street praying for an available cab to drive by.
"That hard to catch a ride, huh" Jules sighed, pulling out her phone as Joon slumped, bummed out. "Uber it is."
Seconds later you felt the doors behind you open again but didn't bother to turn, Joon and you too focused on peeking at Jules' phone as she complained about why an app that was supposed to be used when in need always took forever to arrive.
Two people walked a few feet to the side of you three and that's when you could see from the corner of your eye their figures stopping. Moving your head, you caught a view of a man scanning his phone and another glancing at you. It was Pedro.
"And what are you doing out here in the cold, you look like a chihuahua shivering to death," he chuckled, taking steps towards you.
"Is that a compliment?" you questioned, tilting your head as he gave you a smug look, making you guess for yourself.
"Pretty sure he's means you look like a rodent," Jules dryly commented, swiping through her phone before groaning loudly. "Goddammit! The nearest driver is 25 minutes away, I don't want to be waiting that long for a ride that's probably gonna be my whole day's pay."
Realizing the situation you and your friends were in, Pedro lifts a hand trying to get attention. "You guys need a ride? I drove here and-"
"No thank-," you intervene.
"-yes, please," Jules cuts you off, sending you a small glare as you gave one back.
You were not going to ask someone you met just this morning for a ride home. It's too much.
Pedro laughed at the sight of you two yelling at each other through your minds. Telepathy really works when it comes to your friends. Joon just stood there, not really caring what decision we came to terms with. He figured since Jules and you stayed with him long enough he could join along with whatever you two did, so it was up to you guys to make the final move.
"Okay, don't kill each other," Pedro joked, making you move your eyes away from Jules back to him. "How about I drive you three home and you can help me with my makeup this week- so you won't feel like you're taking too much from me."
Squinting, you made a face. "But I already have to do that- it's part of my job."
"She agreed! Let's go," Pedro exclaimed, waving his right arm to you guys to follow him, ignoring you as you tried to debate as to why doing your job wasn't helpful enough.
As Jules kept trying to shut your mouth by placing her palms on it during the walk inside the parking garage, Joon kept looking back confused. "Wait, what about the man? Was he leaving with you?"
Taking a quick glance towards the direction Joon was looking at, Pedro shrugged before pulling out his car keys. "His wife is picking him up."
Joon slowly nodded, not completely convinced that was the case but he'd let it go this time.
Hearing a car beep, you saw a very nice black car's light flash quickly. Walking up closer, Pedro went to the passenger side and opened it while staring at you. "Get in, loser."
Awkwardly standing there, you shook your head and look towards the backseat. "Uh, no- I'm fine with sitting in the back. Maybe Joon can have it since he is the tallest one here."
Joon shook his head. "I'm happy with sitting in the back, ladies first."
Pedro agreed with his last comment, lifting his head to get in the car as you continued to reject his kindness. He already offered you a ride home, you weren't able to take the front seat.
You both continued to fight about the seat before Jules flapped her arms and jumped inside instead. "We are not going to argue for hours over a seat, I'll take it."
Lowering your shoulders, you smiled as Pedro sent you a displeased look. Heading towards the door, Joon opened the door for you, kindly sending you a warm smile. You returned one back and moved to the seat behind the drivers.
Joon followed after you and sat behind Jules as you could see Pedro speed walk around the car, quickly jumping in. He turned towards the back, glancing at the two of you. "Where to?"
"Jules," you called out. She pulled out her phone and showed it to him before saying, "this is it."
"City girls," he blurted out. "The rats on the streets must be a sight to see."
"Let me see?" Joon asked before her phone was shoved to his face. "Hey, I live three streets away from here. Nice."
"We're basically neighbors," you nudged him, making him do the same as Pedro and Jules just stared at the both of you.
"Anyway," Pedro let out a small laugh, "let's go before I change my mind."
Putting the car in reverse, drive, and zooming off, we were on our way. The ride was filled with Jules playing with the radio, Pedro nicely trying to get her fingers off his screen, and Joon calling out the different trees he'd seen out the window the entire time.
At one point Joon even handed you his phone and asked for your number in case either of you needed help with the internship or the cheesy joke of one of you needing sugar in the middle of night.
Once he was dropped off, it took less than ten minutes to arrive to your apartment building.
"You can just pull in right there," Jules declared, pointing at an open spot in front of our lobby doors.
Taking a quit scan, you objected. "No, that's for emergencies only. Just go around the block, we can walk."
Jules protested, pleading Pedro to not give in to your nonsense. "This is an emergency- I want to go home already!"
"It's a red line; therefore, no parking."
Pedro laughed as you raised your voice, determined to not let him get away with this. You were not about to pay for a ticket just because she couldn't walk a few feet...and then a few more to get home.
"Is she always this stubborn?" Pedro jested, earning a hard raise of the eyebrows from Jules.
"You should see her when we study. If you aren't there on time you're kicked out of the discord." Smacking her arm, she huffs and smacks you back.
"I need to be apart of this discord," Pedro stated, making you roll your eyes.
"It's for students only, grandpa," you replied, causing him to gasp.
"That's not how you should treat someone who gave you a ride across town, intern," he retorted and pulled up along the red crub, making Jules laugh as you sent him a dirty look.
So he's pulling that card.
Jules opened her side of the door, stepping out before grabbing her bag and leaning down against the window. "Welp, I am going inside before he personally fires me for befriending you. See you inside and thanks Mr. man who can still get me fired even though he's not my boss!"
Next thing you knew, she was opening the entrance doors and sliding right inside them. It was time for you to go as well.
You could see him grab his phone, unlocking it, and then placing it right in front of your face. "Give me your number."
Scoffing, you pushed his hand away. "Not even going to ask?"
"We both know you're too difficult to easily agree to a question like that," he countered, pushing it back towards you, not leaving until you accepted it.
Was it unprofessional to be giving the main lead of a new television series your personal number? Maybe a lot of people do it, you mean there are plenty of workers who end up friends with cast members all the time on sets.
You're sure these workers have given their numbers away on multiple occasions.
Handing him back his phone, he grinned. "Great, now I can directly reach you whenever I need coffee."
"Only during work hours," you replied, shaking your pointer finger at him. "I don't get paid overtime unless I am on the clock."
He chuckled, twisting his body to get a better view of you. "Yeah, yeah. We'll see about that."
With that, he jumped out of the car and opened your car door, allowing you to step outside and be met with the freezing temperatures once again.
How much you hate the cold when its windy.
"See you tomorrow, kid," he scanned over, waiting for you to comeback with some snarky remark for his pet name.
Stepping away from his car and meeting the sidewalk, you turned around towards him to find him leaning against his door now, watching you to make sure you make it inside safely.
"Same with you- thanks for the ride, grandpa," you smirked, making him suppress a laugh as you turned your back to him again, making your way to the entrance doors.
Two feet away, you stopped when you heard him chant out your name. Seeing him inside his car with his passenger window rolled down, he tried his hardest to move his head against it to see you. "By the way," he started, "you don't look like a rodent."
Feeling flustered by the random yet sweet compliment, you tried hiding your big smile by waving him off, trying to hide your face with your hands and sped walked inside.
You hoped he didn't see the tint on your cheeks.
Unfortunately, your hopes never come true.
733 notes · View notes
clubdionysus · 6 months ago
Text
[BAD DECISION #26] January, Still
Tumblr media
warnings: anyone familiar with bd will see the header image and know exactly which chapter we're on lmao, the tie chapter!!!! starluvrs are their lovely awkward selves, dominant jk, oc is tied to.... a pull-up bar? jk is a perv who just likes looking at her lol, kissing is banned!! the word 'baby' is not!! titty worship, titty sucking, fingering, oral (f receiving), clit spitting, babe likes it messy <3, nose nudging, finger sucking (f), gentle kook <3, bratty oc, ass eating (f receiving (minimal tbh (big sad for jk))), prone bone, unprotected sex, he finishes on her ass!! lovely lovely lovely... until the red witch is mentioned!!! argument!! heightened emotions!! the introduction of the cu ajummas!!! big pouty ending :( fluff, smut, angst
wc: 11k
bd total wc: 540k (ongoing)
AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI
Tumblr media
If there's one thing you've learned about Jeon Jeongguk in your time, it's that he's a giggler .
In all situations, of any severity, it's not uncommon to see his nose scrunching with dimples in his cheeks, as he presses his lips together to keep them quiet.
Standing at the end of his bed in a pair of boxers, hair dishevelled and the sheen of your glitter sparkling on his skin in the low light of his lamp, he is, again, giggling.
There's something about Jeongguk's laugh - the way it always sounds different and yet entirely 'him', how he stutters for breath and the way his eyes will squeeze together, little puffs beneath them, nose scrunched like a bunny - that always gets you laughing, too.
In bars, in coffee shops, in the gym - wherever he is, the ambient sound of happiness will surely follow.
You echo it back; join in with him. A melody not unique in composition, but wholly yours nonetheless.
Laughter comes easily with him, in the place of awkwardness or uncertainty.
The uncertainty, at the moment, comes in the form of decision-making. Not a good, nor a bad one - the bad decision is already in progress - but a simply inconsequential one.
In either hand, he holds up a tie; one black, one a mixture of blue and purple paisleys.
"Black is sexier," you consider out loud, and Jeongguk thinks the thought you're putting into the decision-making is ridiculous - but he's also a little nervous so he's letting you take your time. Smiling, because it's more fun than succumbing to the nerves.
"Sexier," he nods in agreement. "But it is also my funeral tie."
Your face contorts with mild disgust, a stunted mumble of objection catching in your throat.
"We are not using your funeral tie," you whisper-shout.
Cross-legged on his bed, there's a glow to you. It's probably the post-sex aura radiating, but Jeongguk thinks you look right at home in his sheets. Thinks that maybe it'd be nice for you to stay the night. He's not sure if you will, yet. Hasn't asked. Probably won't.
It's not that he doesn't want to ask. Just knows that things between the pair of you aren't as simple as they feel.
Yet simplicity bubbles around you both as he giggles (again) and tosses the black tie down onto the floor. Will put it away later. For now, he's getting back onto his bed with you, sitting opposite, mirroring you. "Yeah, that's probably a good shout."
Taking his tie from his hands, you run your fingers over the pattern; feel the ridges, how smooth it is, tug it a little to test out the structural integrity of the woven threads.
"So..." you say somewhat apprehensively. It's like both of you are slightly malfunctioning. Sex in and of itself is not new to either of you. Sex with one another? Again, tried and tested. Happy customers all round. There's no need for tension.
"So..." he repeats back in exactly the same tone.
When your gaze drops to your hands, and the tie that's in them, some of the hair tucked behind your ear falls loose. Jeongguk thinks he should push it back, but doesn't. Is trying to wise up to what you deem intimate, and knows that it would likely count towards it.
"Why are we so terrible at this?" you ask with a smile as you look back up towards him. He's like a mirror in the way he reflects your expression, eyes sparkling as if he has tiny little disco balls in them.
"Fuck knows," he shrugs, forgetting himself, and reaching over to tuck the hair back. Just felt right. He'll probably lament it later. "How'd you wanna do this?"
Jeongguk's headboard is flat and upholstered. There are no bedknobs to tie any wrists to. It perhaps would have been better done at your place, but there's no reason why it can't be done at yours another time.
The only real alternative is just binding your wrists together behind your back or above your head. Both are fine with you, but are also things you've done before. You wanna spice it up a little.
Glancing around his room for an alternative, your eyes land on the pull-up bar above his door. You tilt your head, considering possibilities, and Jeongguk follows your gaze. Clocks what you're looking at. Feels a throbbing pump of blood going directly to his cock. Gets a little plumper.
"Yeah?" he questions, knowing exactly where your thoughts are going. "There?"
You nod. "Yeah. There. I think. Maybe. I don't know. What do you think?"
"What's this then, huh?" Jeongguk grins, nudging your knee a little. "Nerves? From our resident Disco Ball?"
"Oh, piss off," you laugh, nudging him right back, unfolding your legs as you hop off his bed and look him directly in the eye. You pull his shirt over your head. Let it drop to the floor. Don't drop your gaze - but he does drop his jaw a little. Nerves? Please. You hold up his tie. "Now are you gonna put me in my place, or should I put you in yours?"
If there's one thing Jeongguk likes, it's a challenge - and the way you're looking at him? Brows a little raised? A smirk on your lips? You're the human embodiment of a challenge, and the one thing Jeongguk likes more than a challenge? 
Winning .
He stands. Says nothing as he comes to tower in front of you, stiff in his underwear, nodding ever so gently as he looks down at you, bottom lip beneath his teeth. His hand skirts up your waist. Strokes. Squeezes.
Guiding you slowly to his door, Jeongguk worries about Jimin coming home unannounced. There'll be no explaining this away.
Still, he wants to fuck you more than he wants to worry about Jimin getting an eyeful.
He positions you where he wants you. Knows it's gonna force you on your tiptoes. Kind of thinks it serves you right for challenging him.
Jeongguk jokes with you, repeatedly making sure you're okay as he ties your wrists together above your head, and then secures the rest of the tie around the pull-up bar. It's perfect.
His knots are tight, thanks to a grandfather who was keen on teaching him the law of the land when he was younger, but he knows how to get you out of them quickly if needs be. He's surprised he's not really used them before in the bedroom.
Standing back to admire his handiwork, the way you look at him is unlike anything he's ever seen before; wanting, needy, restrained.
Nudging his nose up against yours, Jeongguk is reminded of his own desires. Wonders if you'll let him indulge him again. Knows that he'll have to ask.
"What's the rule on kissing?" he husks against your lips.
You smile. Shake your head, and let your nose nudge up against his. "You only get one vulnerability at a time. Either I'm tied up, with no kisses, or I'm untied with kisses. Your choice."
"You're so fucking mean," he says softly, pulling back with a teasing groan.
Jeongguk looks at you now there's a little distance; down, then up. Smirks.
Doesn't look away as he pulls his desk chair out and spins it to face you. Doesn't look away when sinks down into it. Doesn't look away as he slouches into a recline, legs spread, a hand resting by his crotch as his elbow is propped up on the arm of the chair.
Tongue toying with his lip ring, he looks like a fucking asshole. Arrogant . 
God, he's worthy of it, though. 
If you looked like him, you'd probably be a wanker. Toned abs, strong arms, darling eyes full of cosmic entities. He's equal parts saint and sinner, and the way he's looking at you? As if he's deciding whether or not he wants to drag you down to hell or lift you up to the heavens has you apprehensive.
The music hums from Jeongguk's speaker, and you're thankful for it, 'cause you're sure you're breathing far heavier than you should be. Lips a little pouted, resting ajar, the way your eyes don't drop from his gets him all hot and bothered, too - he's just better at hiding it than you are.
"Are you just gonna stare at me all night?" You question, a little attitude in your voice.
Jeongguk's lips curve upwards. "Maybe."
You go to bite back, but notice the way he's palming his crotch beneath his boxers. They're black, so obscure the hardening length within them, but you know him. Know exactly what he's gripping onto.
"Looking at me gets you hard, huh?" You tease.
Eyes dancing over your body, finding his favourite parts and then finding new ones, Jeongguk feels an overwhelming sense of contentment.
But he simply smirks, instead. Plays it cool. "Maybe - but let's not pretend like I don't get you wet."
With a roll of your eyes, painfully aware how exposed you are, you press your thighs together. The trepidation - anticipation - of what's to come has you excited. Nipples hard, pussy wet. Denying it is a blatant lie, but Jeongguk enjoys the thrill of your chase.
"You're cute, Gguk, but not that cute. Don't oversell yourself."
He laughs now. Stands. Walks towards you; brooding and dark in gaze. Tilts his head.
You expect his hand to dip; to spread your legs and first out how much of a dirty little liar you are.
But he doesn't.
He nudges his nose against yours, smirk present. You're not entirely steady on your feet, the restrictive nature of the position you're in unbalancing you. He senses this. Lets his fingers trail up your hips and stroke against the curve of your waist.
Pulling back slightly, dark eyes on yours in the shrouded gloaming of his bedroom, Jeongguk grips your waist a little tighter.
"You're so mean to me," he simpers, trailing one of his hands further up. He ghosts your chest, and secures it by your neck, thumb stroking over your jaw and onto your cheek. He angles you to face him. You've never wanted to touch him more, the tie keeping you bound away from him your new worst enemy. "You really think I'm that hideous, huh?"
Oh, he's sin . Jet black hair and eyes to match, warm skin and sculpted muscles, artwork embedded in his skin, just like his touch is embedded in yours.
"Repulsive," you simply nod. He smirks.
"Shame," he husks. You half think he might kiss you. He doesn't. "I think you're gorgeous."
It's just sex. Just sex. Just thinking with his cock. Doesn't mean it - oh, but what a nice fantasy to indulge in. Maybe he does mean it.
"Hmm?" he teases when you fail to formulate a response. "Did you hear me, B? Hear what I said?"
You nod. "I heard."
"What did I say?"
"I'm gorgeous."
He nods. "Yeah. You are. So fucking hot. Get me so hard," he grits, gripping his cock over his boxers.
Intrusive, is the thought that wonders if Jeongguk is like this with other people.
You wonder if he showered Jiyeong in compliments; if Hayun received such heavy words of adoration. It's not an idea you want to entertain but you can't seem to help yourself.
And so, vulnerable and a little shy, you edge back. Feel a little stupid being so bare for him. Want control over the situation, but you can't get it. Not when your wrists are bound above your head, kept firmly in place thanks to the knots tied by Jeongguk.
He notices the slight shift, but doesn't realise why. Tilts his head. "Tell me what you want."
You look him in the eyes, a little unsure of yourself. He can sense your nerves. Understands something's not quite right. Draws you closer to him.
The warmth of his skin on yours soothes the cold sweat of comparison. 
"Go on," he encourages. "Tell me, baby."
You nudge your nose up against his. Know that raising your worries about other girls will only make things awkward. Of course, Jeongguk would rather know your discomforts, but you don't think they're worth sharing.
So instead, you just say, "want you to make me feel good."
It's a simple answer, but you really do mean it. You think it will distract your brain.
Jeongguk nods. Presses a kiss against your jaw. Lingers. Repeats, just an inch lower, on your throat. Trails down. Is firm with his pressure, tongue wet, teeth grazing. You moan into his touch; one of his hands pulling your waist closer, the other firmly keeping your neck where he wants it.
Amorous in his display of desire, Jeongguk wants you to know how badly he wants you. Kisses with intent. Breaks from it only when he has to. Mumbles against your skin. Tells you how hard he is. How much he wants to fuck you.
Shameless and brazen, Jeongguk pulls away for just a moment. Looks at you, eyes dark, chest heavy as his heart beats beneath his ribs. Darts his gaze from your eyes to your lips.
You mirror him. Chest heaving, the pressure of his touch lingers on your throat. His hands massage your chest. Thumbs stroke over your nipples. He squeezes. Asks, "Can I?"
Mewling ever so slightly, desperate for more, you nod. "Please."
The second his lips come into contact with your chest - delivering pretty kisses, until his tongue swirls around your nipple - your head leans back.
He smiles when you moan, the movement of his lips so subtle but so heavenly, and strokes his hands up and down your body - waist, hips - until he settles on supporting your tits. He squeezes. Toys. Plays. Makes sure the nipple that isn't in his mouth is still getting attention.
There's something about your moans and the way you can't seem to hold them in whenever he's sucking on your tits that just really excites him. Gets his cock twitching a little harder. Makes him deepen the pressure with which he's sucking on your nipple.
He switches sides. Lets a long, flat, wet, lick of his tongue tease you before swirling around the hardened bud. He's gentle in how he sucks, now. Short. Quick. Feathery. Like little kisses, again and again and again.
The sensation has you pressing your legs together as wetness seeps from your pussy onto your inner thighs. All you want is to put your hands in his hair; keep him fixed in position.
But you can't. You're restricted. Forbidden from touching him. Makes you whimper as he builds momentum, moving from side to side, teasing you, stimulating you in a way that you can't ever remember feeling before. It's too much but also not enough. You want him in your cunt; fingers, cock, whatever. You don't care. Just need something. Anything.
"Fuck me," you beg; hushed in the darkness of sin. "Please."
Jeongguk eases up on his teasing, and looks at you with unadulterated hedonism. He's so hard in underwear; precum pooling at his tip. He wants to fuck himself into you so badly, feel your hot walls clamping around in, but knows as soon as he's inside you he's gonna cum. Is so horny he thinks he might die.
Thing is, he doesn't want this to be over. Wants to fuck you endlessly.
You get him so hard. So firm, and thick. Fat . His cock is never redder , never angrier , never leakier , than it is when he's with you. You make him wanna commit sins all in pursuit of an unholy feeling that somehow feels like heaven on earth.
He's gonna die, and it's gonna be all your fault. He knows this. Knows that fucking you is such a bad decision. Knows that he's struggling to separate how good the sex is from how he's feeling.
But desire is dictating his actions now, and you're begging him. You want this as much as he does.
"You want me to fuck you, huh?" He grits as he pushes his middle finger between your soaked folds. Even he's surprised by how fucking wet you are. Smirks to himself. "Fucking hell, B. You do want it, don't you?" You whimper. "Tell me what you want. Go on. Tell me, baby."
Oh, the dreaded B word. Has your head all fuzzy and tummy all ticklish. Makes you feel all sorts of strange; worries you about what the fuck is happening between you both.
And yet your eyes stay wide and wanting, lips all pouty. His finger strokes between your folds. Isn't aiming for your clit, nor entrance, just teasing. You raise to your tiptoes, fingers grabbing onto the materials of the tie. He's so fucking mean in the best of ways.
"Huh, baby?" he teases again.
"Fuck me," you rasp, because it's all you can manage as he sinks his finger into your entrance. The muscle in your torso tense immediately, the feeling of him entering you both satisfying and yet not enough. "More."
With a lazy smile on his lips, and heavy-lidded eyes looking down on you, Jeongguk pushes a second finger into your soaked hole. "That better?"
You nod. Whine. Chest heaves. "I wanna touch you, too."
He laughs ever so sinfully, lustful in the way he licks his lips. Swallows. Breathes a relieved sigh; and if he's just started breathing again after a minute of holding it.
And then, he shakes his head. He raises his spare arm, and you're confronted with a sight reserved for only the luckiest of girlies - of which right now? You most definitely are.
The muscles in his torso move beneath his skin; tense. Tight. He's sculpted in such a way that you can't believe he's human, the curve of the socket connecting his arm to his body seemingly just as alluring as the rest of him. A small stripe of hair covers the skin, a little damp, the heat of desire forcing him to work up a sweat - not that you mind. Not in the slightest. 
If anything, it just makes you feel even crazier for how badly you want him. He extends his arm upwards and clasps his large hand around both of your wrists.
The position keeps him just inches or so from you.
He thinks it's too far.
So, he closes it. 
Sinks his lips back beneath your jaw. Licks. Trails to your earlobe. Sucks. Nibbles.
God, you'd do anything to touch him. Your body writhes, any sense of balance lost and entirely depending on him. His hand is so close to your fingers, and you're dying to lace yours with his. The restriction makes it impossible. You whine.
"Let me touch you."
He smiles. Shakes his head ever so gently, keeping his lips locked on your neck. Kisses. Says, "No."
And so you bring out the big guns. "Please, Koo."
He pulls away. Looks you dead in the eye. Says, "Don't call me that. I'll fucking cum in my pants if you call me that."
You pout. Tease him, now. "Don't call you what, Koo?"
Oh god, he's gonna die .
Decides you need a little death first, though, so ignores your taunts and drops to his knees. Buries his face in your cunt. Wastes no time.
He knows how much you struggle to formulate sentences when he's eating your pussy, so thinks it's the safest bet to shut you up. He hooks one of your legs over his shoulder for better access, and licks thick slow stripes between your folds. Flicks against your clit. Massages. Sucks.
"Fuck."
Oh, he's pleased . Loves how much you enjoy his mouth. Could eat your pussy for days. Wishes you'd let him do it; just eat you for hours.
Although when he thinks about it, he's got you tied up. He can do exactly that.
But then... an idea brews.
If you were to say that men can't multitask, Jeongguk would take great offence. This, right now? Prime example. He's got leaking on his tongue, pussy wet and plump from arousal, but is also thinking about other ways to get you coming undone. If anything, he's got, like, the biggest brain ever. Very sexy of him.
His tongue toys with your clit, flicking, before his lips press a pretty kiss against it. You need your hands in his hair. Need to hold him close. Need his nose nudging up against you as he dips down to your entrance.
He's got a hand gripping your ass, keeping the leg hooked over his shoulder in place, while the other reaches to massage your breasts. He alternates between them, keeping his mouth busy delivering pleasure to your pussy.
The pressure of his lip ring is almost impossible to feel thanks to the sheer amount of ecstasy you're in, but every now and again, you notice it. It mostly occurs when he's sucking on your clit, and it makes your legs so weak. Gets your pussy leaking so much. Has you whining. Whimpering.
Jeongguk fucking loves it; the way you sound, the way you taste, the way you feel.
His adoration of your anatomy makes it so hard for him to stop. He doesn't want you to cum yet, wants to wait it out - but fuck. He's gotta have it. Gotta steal this orgasm from you. Needs it.
As he sucks on your clit, the hand that had been keeping your leg steady creeps down to your soaked entrance. Doesn't fuck about. Wastes no time sinking two of his fingers into you. The fullness catches you off guard. Almost has you losing your balance.
"Untie me," you moan, desperate for your hands in his hair.
Still sucking on your clit, he shakes his head and pulls away, releasing your sensitive bud from his lips with a pouty squeak. 
"You know the word, B" he reminds you, looking up for the first time in a while. He doesn't think he's ever seen your eyes so wide, lips so pouty. Your chest is heaving, his fingers scissoring inside you. "Say chess."
You wanna whine. Wanna tell him he's mean - but he feels so good. His nose glistens in the low light, drenched in your pussy and his own spit. Chin, too. God, he's pretty, you think. So fucking pretty. Belongs between your legs. Keeps pushing his fingers into you. Gets you moaning.
For all the times Jeongguk has claimed to be an ass guy, he's somehow entranced by the way your tits look from this angle. So round, and tell proportioned, and - fuck - he wouldn't mind sucking on them again. He's got a plan of action, though. Can't let himself get distracted.
"No?" he teases. "No chess?"
You glare at him. "Fuck you."
He laughs. Shakes his head. "Not yet, baby. Gonna make you cum first."
If he doesn't stop calling you baby you're gonna fall in love with him. It's just science. How the brain works. You've never been good at science, but it seems like a plausible hypothesis.
It's exactly why you need your hands free, so you can keep his mouth on your pussy to stop it from saying shit that makes your tummy feel funny.
But then you realise you do have leverage. You have legs - one of which is hooked over his shoulder. You alter its position slightly; hook it further around his back. Pull him in closer.
He laughs. "Needy, aren't you, baby?"
"Gguk," you whine.
Yes , you are needy. Yes , you want him. Yes , you wanna cum - but fuck !
He makes it so hard to just let yourself. You wanna fight . Wanna prove that you aren't weak. Prove that you have just as much control over the situation as he does.
But then his tongue licks between your folds and swirls around your clit. He retracts. Teases, once more, with his tongue. Flicks against your bud. Kisses.
He pulls back, again. Looks at the mess all over your pussy. Grunts in approval. And then? He spits .
"Fuck."
Jeongguk delves back in. Spreads his spit with his tongue. Laps against you like a thirsty dog drinking from a puddle. Doesn't stop. Keeps fucking his fingers into you.
The sensation of pleasure charging through your body is electric. It builds and builds - and then he's sucking again. 
It's too much . Too good . Gets your toes pointing. Your leg clamps behind his back, keeping him in position, as the walls of your pussy do the same to his fingers.
Your whines echo in the room, Jeongguk holding your hip to keep you steady with his spare hand as you begin to shake. Wants to speak. Wants to encourage you. Knows he can't pull away. Doesn't wanna ruin your orgasm.
Instead, he hums as he sucks, lips vibrating. You're almost fucking crying from how good it feels. Moaning his name, cursing to the high heavens, breaths velvety as you whine.
"There," you can barely manage. "There. Gguk, I'm gonna - fuck. Gonna cum."
You don't need to tell him. He knows. Hums again. Yeah, baby. I got you.
The build of electricity reaches capacity. The voltage is too high. Gets you shaking - trembling - as you writhe in position. Your balance is totally gone, Jeongguk is entirely responsible for keeping you in position as your walls throb around his fingers. He keeps his mouth on your cunt, not wanting to part from it, until your body jolts from the overstimulation. He's fucked around with you enough to know when you're spent. Know this is it.
He pulls away slowly. Is gentle as he withdraws his fingers from you. Kisses your thighs as he holds your hips to keep you steady. Gets to his feet gradually, leaving kisses all the way up your body; below and above your belly button, between your ribs, sternum, above the heart of yours that is beating a mile a minute. Stops only when he reaches your lips. 
Instead, he nudges his nose against yours. It's still wet from your pussy, though his chin mostly left the stain of you on your own skin as he journeyed up it.
And then, delicately, he presses a kiss to the tip of your nose. Smiles. "Hey."
As you reply with a small, giggly, exhausted 'hey', he stands up straighter, and presses a kiss against your forehead.
"You good?" he asks.
Nodding, you mumble a response for him. You're so spent. Looks so pretty, eyes glassy, skin sparkly. He's got a hand on your throat, stroking gently, but keeps the other one away. It's covered in your pussy, and he doesn't wanna dirty you - but as you notice it, your lips part. His lip ring? Does the thing
Eyes wide on his, you move your gaze between them and his hand. Don't wanna speak yet - still a little giggly - but want him to know you wanna clean him up. He gets the message pretty easily. Brings his fingers to your lips. Presses his own lips together as yours part.
"Christ," he curses as he watches you suck on his fingers. Can't believe you haven't sucked him off yet. Knows he'll die when it eventually happens.
Jeongguk lifts his spare hand. Fiddles with the knots keeping your arms above your head. They ache. You're pretty sure there's no blood left in your hands. He sort of realises they'll be sore, so doesn't let them fall.
He keeps them bound around the wrist and lowers them gently. Keeps your arms straight, and loops them over his head, your elbows resting on his shoulders for a little extra support. Finally withdraws his fingers from your mouth, and strokes your arms with both of his hands.
"You okay?" he checks again.
"Think my arms are gonna fall off," you pout, but he just smiles. "I mean it. So mean."
"Always couldda said chess," he reminds you - and he's right.
"Didn't wanna."
"Well, then it's your fault if your arms fall off."
"Would you still fuck me?" you hum. "If my arms fell off?"
Jeongguk furrows his brows and shakes his head with a little confusion - but not denial. Instead, he says, "I'd miss your hands - and your wrists - but, yeah? Course I would."
He can't see a reality or version of you he wouldn't wanna fuck. It's the curse of knowing how good your pussy is; hates he can't have it forever, so will bury himself in it as often as he can while he still can.
The certainty of his answer makes you feel all fuzzy. You put it down to the orgasm.
He reaches behind his head to fiddle with the knots around your wrists and loosens them for you. As you pull your hands back around, he rubs at your wrists, making sure you can move them okay. Worries that maybe he tied you up a little too tightly. Tosses the tie on his bed so can be fully present.
Gentle with you when he needs to be, Jeongguk really is the best person to help you through your issues. He's attentive and careful, conscious of your needs while never making you feel like he's sacrificing his own.
The truth of the matter is that he never is. 
The biggest turn-on for Jeongguk is having a partner who enjoys what he does. He likes praise. Likes compliments. Feels fulfilled when a partner cums, and even more so when they give him that look after he's done. The same one you're giving him right now.
Almost as if you know what he needs, you smile and whisper, "thank you."
"What for?" he whispers back, a little obtuse but wanting clarity.
You run your hands up his chest, and settle them by the base of his neck. It's so nice to touch him again. "For making me feel good. You always make me feel so good."
"Yeah?" He asks with a teasing smile, keeping you talking because he can't stop thinking about how much he wants to kiss you. Doesn't realise he's looking at your lips.
"Mhmm," you nod, not noticing his eyes - mainly because you're looking at his lips, too.
The space between you both is so minimal that it would take the smallest of movements to sink into one another. You wanna kiss him so badly, but know that it's unwise to make a habit of it - so you pull away.
He regretfully lets you go. Watches as you walk to the bed, and kneel onto it. Lowering yourself into position, Jeongguk lets a smirk linger on his lips.
Face down, ass up, you're a fucking vixen - and the way you hold your hands behind your back? Encouraging him to tie your wrists again? God . You're a deviant. Hellish. So fucking hot Jeongguk can barely control himself.
Slow as he gets himself into position, Jeongguk grazes the curve of your ass with his fingers. Looks down on you like a man possessed.
"Sure?" he asks. Knows you came hard. Worries this won't actually be all that great for you.
"Do me a favour?" you hum into his sheets.
"Yeah?"
"Shut up and fuck me."
Jeongguk exhales a stunted laugh, the smile on his lips fond as he shakes his head. "You've such a way with words."
"You should see what else this mouth can do," you tease, not looking back at him. Hearing the swipe of the tie being lifted from his sheets, your walls clench . It would be embarrassing how easy it is for him to turn you on, if it wasn't for how much you know Jeongguk likes it.
Fingers clasping around your wrists, Jeongguk takes his time. The fabric is smooth and silky, but there are marks from where it dented your skin before. He doesn't secure you as tightly, but is still firm as he knots the fabric together. Hands secured by the small of your back, Jeongguk knows he isn't gonna last long.
There's a soft sound of cotton against skin; Jeongguk ridding himself of his underwear. You can picture it - how hard his cock is, the slight wobble as he moves, prick firm and standing to attention. You imagine how tight his balls must be, and how leaky his pretty head is, precum seeping from his tip.
Expecting to feel him enter you, you relax your body. Sink into the downward position with a curved arch to your back.
Instead, Jeongguk sinks a single finger into you. Mumbles to himself. "Still so fuckin' wet."
He withdraws. Strokes the supple skin of your ass. Spanks it softly. You squeak quietly, satisfaction lacing your tone, all pleased and purry. Jeongguk might die.
Still, he's determined to take his time. Crouches behind you. Anyone else and you'd probably feel a little insecure, but you know how weak Jeongguk is for ass in all capacities. It's hard to feel shy when he drools at the fucking sight of it. It's not just your ass though. He's pretty sure he's never liked another pussy more. It's just right for him; in how it feels, and how it looks. Exactly the kind of cunt that makes his dreams wet, cock hard.
He licks a thick slow stripe up your folds. Drags his tongue from your clit to your entrance - and then sinks it into your hole. Holds onto your thighs as he gets as deep as his tongue will allow him, stroking at your walls. His nose presses against your perineum, and - fuck .
You'll let him do it, you decide. If he asks to eat your ass, you'll let him. Won't say no.
But the most cursed thing of all? You want it. The anticipation, the knowledge that he wants it, god, it just makes you want it so badly.
So badly, that you have no control when you say, quite out of the blue, "higher."
It's a single word that could be interpreted in many different ways, but he knows. His tongue is still in your cunt, but he knows you're asking for his tongue to be higher.
And so he does it.
He withdraws from your creamy hole and flicks his tongue upwards. Teases your perineum. Gets you moaning even harder than you had been before. Kisses. Moves to your thigh, so he can sink his teeth in a little.
And then, with one slow, flat lick, Jeongguk drags his tongue from your clit, up your folds and past your entrance, until his wet tongue is on your tight muscle. He doesn't press down. Just licks. Spits. Spreads it with his tongue. Gets you feeling all sort of fucked up. He mumbles a groan of satisfaction against you. Is barely even eating your ass. Not like he knows can. Not how wants to. He's saving that. Will eat your ass properly, one day.
He pulls away. Smirks when your moans sound all whiney.
"Fuckin' love your ass," he husks as he stands behind you and lines his cock up with your entrance. Spits down, and watches as it trails over your asshole and down to the tip of his cock. Resting his thumb against the puckered muscle, Jeongguk puts a little pressure on it. He's not gonna penetrate it, but he is gonna think about it.
Just wants you to see how good it can feel; have you imagining how much better it could feel if he did toy with your ass like he wants to.
He sinks his cock into you slowly. It's a miracle you can stretch enough for his girth, but Jeongguk's correct when he thinks that your pussy is made for him. The fit is just right. Snug and warm, all wet and wanting, it's like coming home.
It's so comfortable. Exactly what he needs to come undone, and as his hips buck against your ass, his hand gripping the tie around your wrists, he knows it won't take long. Your pussy strokes him to perfection; and he wants it to. Wants you to make him cum. Wants to return the orgasm he took from you.
He pushes into you, deeper, deeper, until he's mewling. "God, you feel so fucking good."
You wanna encourage him but all you can do is moan. You're still sensitive from earlier and know that It won't take much to get you cumming again - and when his spare hand comes around the front of your body to toy with your clit? You're a goner.
His name lingers in the back of your throat as you whine. He's delirious. Keeps fucking himself into you because he's building and building and is so close to reaching his climax. Can feel everything. The clamping of your walls, the wetness of your cunt seeping around the base of cock, god it's all so good.
"Cum for me again, B," he encourages. "Let me feel you."
Hypnotic in the way his commands have you doing exactly what asks of you, your body unravels like a tie coming loose - but it's not at all. You're fixed in position and it makes you cum even harder.
The pressure of your orgasm around his thick length has Jeongguk cursing. He's there. Can't hold back. Pulls out only cause he feels like he has to, and continues jerking himself over your ass until he erupts with thick spurts of cum.
He paints your hands with his orgasm, every last drop being spent on you. It soaks into his tie, but he doesn't give a fuck. Squeezes his shaft to make sure sure the evidence of his pleasure is all yours. Watches as a white bead gathers at his slit, the final dregs of his cum all yours.
He collapses beside you on his back, a hand over his chest, lungs heaving beneath his ribs. Stares at the birds. Wonders how the fuck he got here.
Your body copies his, your chest and tummy now flat against his sheets, arms still bound behind you. Just as whimpery as Jeongguk is breathless, you can't imagine ever having a better fuck than that. Eyes closed, your lips settle into a pleased smile.
"Fuck," you sigh.
"Again?" Jeongguk jokes. "Don't think I'm ready, B."
You laugh and shake your header further into his sheets. "Think I'll need a few days."
This amuses Jeongguk, mostly because he knows he'll probably wake up with a boner, and you'll probably end up with it in your cunt. Just makes sense.
"You okay?" he asks as he turns to face you. The pleasant hum you nod is ethereal, as if you've just been blessed by an angel, not fucked like a devil. He reaches over to undo the tie, and doesn't care about the fact he gets covered in his own cum. Just tosses the tie to the floor and wipes his hands on his sheets. Will sort it out later.
Flexing your fingers, you turn to rest on your side - again, not giving a shit about the small puddle of cum on your back. Whatever. It's his problem.
"Thanks," you smile.
"For which part?"
"Untying me," you confirm, then adding, "and for tying me up, actually. And the sex. Now that I think about it, especially the sex."
You could listen to Jeongguk's post-sex laugh for hours. It's so breathy and light, free of all stress. A world away from the mood he was in when you arrived, you're so pleased to have Jeongguk back. Happy to exist with, and happy that he seems happy, too.
Reaching over, you push some strands of hair back from his face. He looks sleepy. "Tired?"
He nods, and closes his eyes.
"Sleep?" You suggest.
Again, he nods.
"Where should I sleep?"
He shrugs.
"Here?" You ask.
He nods. You're secretly pleased.
"Am I taking the bed or the floor?"
He pouts. Thinks you don't need to ask. "Bed."
"And you on the floor?" you grin, pleased with how his lips purse, brows scowl, at such a suggestion.
"No," he huffs. "Me. Bed."
"Both bed?"
"Both bed."
Who are you to object when he's all pouty and sleepy, face squishy and dewy in the comedown of a fuck that was way too good to be a fluke?
You're staying.
The pair of you clean yourselves up. Brush your teeth together and grab a glass of water to share. Boundaries seem to be null and void these days. You sleep in his shirt, and he in his boxers, as if that's a totally normal occurrence for a pair of besties. You don't think it's that odd.
As he tries to sleep, Jeongguk questions the morality of what's going on between you. Wonders how healthy it could be, knowing full well the road you're embarking upon rarely ends well.
He thinks he's in a good spot with Hayun, now. Went for coffee with her last week to make sure she wasn't mad at him for the way he spoke to her in the club. She apologised. She explained herself. Said it felt weird to have been replaced. She knows she only has herself to blame, but it still stings.
You've put a lot of trust in Jeongguk. He never wants to hurt you in the way that Hayun hurt him. Never wants to cross those lines, and yet he knows how intimate you think sharing a bed is. The lines are already a little blurry.
If you want to keep things platonic, then outside of the sex, it should be platonic.
He sighs. Stares up at the birds. Doesn't know what the fuck to do.
And so as much as he'd like to, he doesn't hold you in the night. Doesn't shuffle in closer, or rest his arm over your hip like he knows would feel far more natural to him than turning over and away from you.
He showers with you in the morning. Fucks you again, 'cause he remembers that without the sex, it's entirely romantic to share such an intimate space with another person. Makes you both breakfast as a thank you for dinner the night before.
Hair waving around his features, a flannel shirt hanging over his broad shoulders and light jeans hiding away just how toned his thighs are, he's every bit the heartthrob as he insists you leave the dishes.
Your hair is pinned up, and just as dishevelled as his is, but he likes it. You're still in one of his shirts, but it's a smaller one. Fits you better. Is still baggy on you, but he'd watched on as you had tucked the back hem of the shirt up beneath the strap of your bra where it fastens shut.
Was confused at first, but is well aware of how fantastic your ass looks in the jeans you're wearing thanks to the shirt not getting in the way, now.
Large enough that the excess fabric reaches the waistband of your pants, the shirt billows ever so slightly. Untucked at the front, Jeongguk wonders what kind of magic women must hold. He's seen girls wear shirts like this before. Just had no idea how they did it. Thinks maybe he shouldn't know the secrets of womanhood, but likes learning about you, so doesn't think about it too hard.
The shirt is from a concert he went to with Tae while he'd been at uni, and it just reminds him of those days. It's why he never wears it. Reminds him of the early days with Hayun, when there had still been the promise of something great.
You're redefining it, though. Making it brand new. Not changing his past, per se, but altering the way it impacts his future.
"Promise me you won't study too hard?" You plead as you get your shoes on to leave.
He refuses.
"Jimin's keeping tabs on you for me," you tell him. "If you go more than 4 hours without a break, he'll text me and I'll show up and force you to."
"Oh yeah?" Jeongguk entertains your threat. "How so?"
"Dunno," you shrug with raised brows, standing straight now your laces are tied. Tote bag over your shoulder, loose waves framing your face, Jeongguk wonders how many people will give you second glances on your walk to the subway station.
So much so, he doesn't really realise he's putting on his shoes, too.
"Oh?" you hum. "Going out?"
He pauses. Realises. Plays it cool. "Need to get some stuff from the shop. Will come with."
Jeongguk counts four middle-aged men, one girl in her twenties and three teenage boys who look at you a bit too long for his liking. He's not territorial, and especially not over you, but he's very recently fucked you. Maybe he is a little possessive. Sue him . He just doesn't like sharing. It's been well-established.
And in fact, it only gets further established the next weekend, when he picks a sticky note off the wall and reads it aloud: " threesome ."
It's his handwriting, and he definitely did put it up there, but he still looks at it with such shock he can't believe either of you would suggest such a thing.
"Good job Jimin's home," you deadpan. "Will make this a lot easier."
"What! No! Byeol!" And then he whispers, but also kind of shouts when he says, "You're not fucking Jimin again."
"Oh, so you can?" you retaliate, face straight, because you're trying to appear deadly serious. He's falling for it. "But I can't? That's not fair, Jeongguk."
"Wait- What?" He exasperated. "I'm not fucking him either! Neither of us are - Christ Alive. We're not fucking Jimin."
"But it makes sense!"
"We," he signals between you both, eyes struck with horror. "Are NOT fucking Jimin."
"But-"
"Byeol!"
"Koo," you pout, and he thinks if he doesn't die, then maybe he'll just kill you instead. "What if I want it?"
You absolutely do not want it - but you do want to keep winding him up. It's so easy when he's in moods like these, a little stressed and fuse far shorter than usual.
"I- Byeol," he sighs. That's fucking name. Always weakens him. You're a menace, he thinks. "That is beyond the point."
"Please," you pout even more. God he hates how cute you look. So much harder to stand his ground. "Would be so hot."
"How?!" He pushes his head back in disgust. "How would me and Jimin fucking be hot in any way shape or form."
You smirk. "Really want me to answer that?"
"Absolutely not."
And so that sticky note is placed to the side; one to revisit when Jeongguk is less stressed and you're less hellbent on insisting it should be with Jimin.
You know that a threeway with Jimin would probably be fine, but don't wanna risk anything that could impact their friendship. A neutral third party is needed, and as far as you're aware, Jeongguk's preference is girls. It makes sense for you both to seek out someone together that won't impact your daily lives.
You'd rather bring another girl into the mix. Think another guy could maybe give Jeongguk a complex. He's already stated before that he doesn't wanna be cucked, and watching another guy fuck you might make him feel that way. Mutual comfort is needed - plus who doesn't love a good pair of tits?
If he's still spewing bullshit about being an ass guy after watching you play with another girl's tits? Then he'll forever be a liar.
You've also had two mildly disappointing shags with Jimin. You don't need to add a third. Reckon that maybe seeing how well Jeongguk fucks could give Jimin a complex, too.
The topic of conversation comes up again after the next sticky note - spooning sex - is completed. It was ideal because you could remain incredibly quiet given that Jimin is in the apartment, but is also secretly one of your favourite positions. One that always makes you feel so incredibly safe. And the way Jeongguk hugs you afterwards? Doesn't leave you? Presses his torso to your back, not caring for the fact it was where he finished? Oh, god, he's a dream.
"Sorry for being so defensive about it all," he mumbles into your hair. Loves the way it smells, today. Thinks you might have gotten a new shampoo. Doesn't ask cause he doesn't wanna be a weirdo.
"I was only winding you up," you admit. "I don't think it should be with Jimin."
"No?" he confirms, a weight lifting from his chest.
"No."
"Good," he whispers. "It shouldn't be someone we know. I'm no good at sharing."
A laugh catches in your throat. Hardly news.
"I'm not yours," you remind him.
"I know," he says softly. Presses a kiss against your hair. Squeezes you tighter. "Placebo though, init. Sometimes when we're fucking, it feels like you are."
He's not wrong - but it doesn't mean it's right . Both of you know that sex is just sex.
The birds above you watch on with great curiosity. None of them have dropped in quite some time. It's almost as if they're waiting. As if they know something neither of you don't.
You don't think it's safe to indulge in such thoughts. And so you change the topic. Divert feeling of the heart elsewhere.
"Have you spoken to Hayun lately?"
Jeongguk is silent. Doesn't let you go immediately, but eventually rolls onto this back. You stay positioned just as you were; avoidant of his eyes.
"Do you really wanna know?"
You shrug. "As the girl you just fucked? Not really, no. As your friend? Yeah."
It's an answer he can't fault. He's so fucking nosey when it comes to Seokjin but never forces you to talk. Knows that if you started talking about him now, he'd find it incredibly... saddening? Hurtful? He's not sure. Just wouldn't like it.
But you're asking . You want to know.
"Uh, yeah," he admits. "We're fine. She like, apologised for being difficult on New Years, so I sorta buried the hatchet. No point crying over spilt milk."
You nod. 
Feels like the hatchet is in your back, now.
The full details of their argument was never disclosed to you, but it doesn't matter. She was still awful to you. You're never gonna like her. Refuse to play nicely.
Sitting up, you reach down for Jeongguk's shirt to wipe off your back. Would get a tissue or something, but sometimes he has to deal with his own messes, and think that maybe this is one he should have to clean up.
He knew you didn't want to know. Is frustrated with himself for not listening to his gut. Should never have fucking said anything. You grab your underwear and pull them on, hiding yourself away from him as you do so.
"B..." he says quietly, not really sure what he's supposed to do.
"What?" you snap a little, even though you don't mean to. 
It's not fair for you to be mad at him. 
They've got a shared history that runs deep. He was never gonna cut her off, and you never would have wanted him to. All you want, really, is his happiness and - regretfully - she seems to be a big source of it. Not that you've actually seen any evidence of this.
"C'mon," he pleads, as you cover yourself up as you scan the room looking for your bra. It's somehow by the window, so you get out of Jeongguk's bed and head towards it. Don't turn around. Don't wanna look at him with anything you deem to be intimate exposed. "You asked ."
"Well, I shouldn't have," you say quickly, and that's when you realise how fucking mean you're being.
You asked for honesty. You can't punish him for it.
Pushing your hands back through your hair, you sigh. Don't wanna face him, but know you have to. Clasp your bra together for the sake of a little dignity.
"Look," you groan, tilting your head back. Sort of feels like you might cry, and when you turn to face him? Oh, god. It's even worse. Jeongguk watches you with such pain embedded in his features that you can feel his hurt. "She's your friend. I get that. You can talk to me about her... I just..."
Jeongguk considers staying silent, but you can't formulate your words.
"It's just that sometimes when we fuck, it feels like I'm yours," he offers, repeating his earlier thoughts back to you, switching the roles around.
And all you can do is nod. "Yeah. Sometimes it does."
You drop your gaze. Sniff. Apologise. 
Jeongguk's out of his bed, underwear quickly pulled back on, and in front of you within a second.
"Hey," he shushes you, pulling you in for a hug. "B, c'mon. Don't get all soft on me. What's happened to little miss bad bitch? Hey? Where is she?"
God, he's too fucking nice . Skin warm, heart thumping steadily in his chest, he's so soothing. He rubs your arms as he holds you tight. You don't really cry, but it sort of feels like you will at any given moment.
Eventually, you just shrug. "I think maybe I'm bad at sharing, too."
"You're not sharing," he says, and really hopes you know he means it. "And hey, I've seen your ex's name on your phone notifications before. You can't be mad about me being okay with Hayun if you're still okay with him."
And then you realise he doesn't get it. He thinks you're jealous .
You pull away. You look at him with confusion all over your contorted features. "Sorry?"
Now is not the time to say 'forgiven', but he considers it. You look pissed .
"Huh?" Is all he can manage.
"I don't give a shit about you being okay with exes," you exclaim, affronted by the mere suggestion. "Like... I... What ? You could be the best man at their weddings for all I care! We're not together - but you're my friend , and Hayun fucking dickhead to me."
"I know we're not together," he retaliates, defensive now because it seems like you're gunning for him. "But she's my friend, too. I can't throw away years of friendship just because she was mean when she was drunk. Everyone says shit they don't mean when they're drunk."
"Oh fuck off," you say with a little too much gusto. You really don't want to fight - but he's being so fucking obtuse. "She didn't seem to care about throwing away your friendship when she screwed you about! When has she ever done anything remotely friendly?"
Jeongguk rarely looks mad. Rarely looks angry.
But his eyes are black, now.
Your 'welcome' is about to be outstayed and you damn well know it. You grab the dress you had been wearing - one you knew would get him all horny and excited because you were looking forward to hooking up with him again - and pull it over your head.
He mirrors you. Pulls on a pair of sweats. Scoffs.
"I lived a life before I knew you, B. She's got a good five or six years on you. Just because you've not seen any of the good doesn't mean it doesn't exist."
You've got to be kidding me. Your blood is boiling; sizzling up in your veins. ' A good five or six years on you'.
Prick.
The way you laugh is scornful. "You sound like a fucking kid who believes in fairies."
"Maybe I do," he seethes back. "But at least she's making an effort to fix our friendship. What about you? You're still texting your ex. The fuck is Seokjin doing, huh? Other than running off after using you for a quick f-"
He stops himself. Realises just how awful he's being. Looks down. Exhales. Shakes his head.
You're frozen, mouth ajar. Not once has Jeongguk ever been so careless in the way he addresses the Seokjin situation. Never once has he ever made it seem like it's your fault... but he is, now.
Jeongguk fucked himself into you half an hour ago. Whispered shit about how perfect you are for him. And now he's tearing apart your character just to defend some girl who fucked him over for sport.
"What the fuck are we doing?" he asks quietly. Shame washes over him. Good . "Why the fuck are we arguing like this?"
Silence echoes around his room. It's so loud it feels like your ears will bleed. Neither of you enjoy this. Neither of you want to back down, though, either. You're cursed to let it play out.
"Because sometimes when we fuck, it feels like we belong to each other," you say quietly, echoing the sentiment you both felt earlier. "But we don't, and it's pretty clear that there's someone else at the top of your priority list."
"B," he says, with genuine pain in his voice.
You shake your head. Shrug. Lie, when you say. "It's fine. You're not top of mine, either."
He reaches for your hand as you push past him, but you shake him off. Don't wanna stay. Don't wanna look at him. Don't wanna do anything with him.
Jimin's in the kitchen. Sort of looks at you with horror, as fresh, silent tears roll down your cheeks. You wipe them away with the back of your palm, heading towards the door.
You need to put your shoes on, so just say, "please don't ask, Jimin."
He doesn't need to. Heard it all. Is furious with Jeongguk for defending fucking Hayun, yet again. Thought that progress had been made, but apparently not.
"Sorry about him," he just says.
You shrug. Look at Jimin. He can't distinguish your glitter from your tears. "Don't be. Sorry for the noise."
Jimin shakes his head. "Don't be."
Knowing better than to get involved in Jeongguk's disputes, he simply nods. Sends you a text after you leave telling you to check in when you get home so that he knows you're okay. Is aware you'd normally text Jeongguk letting him know, but doubts you'd fancy doing it, now. Waits for a moment, until he hears something smash in Jeongguk's room. Sighs. "Boys."
Rummaging through one of the cabinets for plasters, knowing that Jeongguk most likely needs them, Jimin has no fear as he approaches Jeongguk's room. Knows his frustrations would never be taken out on another person, but has come home to Jeongguk repairing one of his display cases after a particularly bad fight with Hayun once before.
This seems less intense, and yet Jimin can't help but feel like this one is also so much worse. Far more detrimental.
He doesn't knock. Walks straight in to find Jeongguk sitting on the floor against his bed, arms tight around his knees, head down. As predicted, one of the display cases has shattered. He doesn't know how , doesn't really know why Jeongguk thought it would be a good use of energy, but does know that his knuckles are bleeding.
The bed is unmade, and the air is slightly musty but also sweet. Jimin's incredibly familiar with the lingering scent of sex, and knows exactly what will have preceded the argument.
"So," he stays, tossing plasters down to Jeongguk's lap, and taking a seat on Jeongguk's desk chair. Spins lightly. Tries to remain ambivalent. "Still gonna pretend like you're not fucking?"
"Jimin," Jeongguk growls. Doesn't wanna fucking talk about it.
"DB would never do the shit to you that Hayun did to you," he just shrugs. Thinks Jeongguk is in need of some cold hard truths.
"Don't wanna hear it."
"I don't care if you're fucking her or not-"
"Can you shut the fuck up?"
"-but she's done more to help you in the last, what? Eight months? Than any of us could have done for you. She really cares , and if you throw away your friendship with her for the sake of Hay-"
"Oh well, why don't you fuck her, again?" Jeongguk snaps.
Jimin grates his jaw, but doesn't interrupt. Wants to hear what Jeongguk has to say for himself. Kid's clearly hurting, so fuck it. Fine . He'll let him get it all out.
"Third time lucky, right?" He sneers, not looking over at Jimin while he chews him out. " You fuck her again, and you deal with how much she cares , and all her fucking glitter and everything she fucking does for you. Let her hold you to this unreachable standard of being fucking perfect. You can be the one that disappoints her. You can be the one who fucks up. You can be the one that hurts her. You can."
Deep down, in his heart of hearts, Jimin knows that all of Jeongguk's little rant is projection. Rolls his eyes at how much of a baby he's being.
"A little bit of glitter seems like an easy compromise for someone who adores you," Jimin says softly, and that's when Jeongguk finally chokes out a pained sob that he'd been holding in. He doesn't understand why his brain is making him be so fucking mean. He loves your disco ball eyes. "So no, I won't fuck her again, Gguk. And nor should you until you figure this mess out."
Jimin stands up to leave, knowing that Jeongguk needs a little space to breathe. Reminds him, "Hayun's taken, Gguk. She made her choice. Made it over and over again. Fucked you ov-"
"She's single," Jeongguk's voice croaks. He's quiet. Sniffs. Heads all a mess. It's part of the reason he's been pouring himself into his studies. Doesn't know how to cope with it all. "S'why she was here for new years. Is looking for an apartment in the city. Asked me to help next week."
Jimin doesn't know what to fucking say.
A heaviness resides in chest, crushing down on his heart. It hurts.
For Jeongguk, his heart aches.
"Gguk..."
"I don't know what to fucking do."
And though the answer is clear for Jimin, the waters are muddy for Jeongguk. Can't see the sea nor the shore. It's all just murky. Dark. Scary. Out of reach and yet all-consuming; like a tidal wave towering above him, sure to crash down.
"Anyway," Jeongguk sniffs back the tears that reside in his eyes. Shrugs. "Doesn't matter. Got an exam to study for."
For once, Jimin doesn't object. Leaves him be. Texts Yoongi. Code Red. Hayun's single.
Yoongi replies almost immediately.
Fuck. Off. Really?!
It's funny - you think the exact same thing as you get off the subway by your apartment, only to see Tae and Danbi getting on board. Not unusual. You'd say hey, normally.
But it's not normal, not today. Not when Nabi and Hayun are with them, too.
Nabi catches your gaze. Smiles. Waves. You really do like her, just hate the fact that Hayun is her best fucking friend - and why is she still here?! Why can't she just go back to her fucking boyfriend and go live her best life in Seoul? Why does she need to be down here in the city you call home?
She's overstayed her welcome - and as she follows Nabi's smile, she falters when her eyes land on you, just before the carriage rolls away. Pursing her lips, they settle into a smile. Dead behind the eyes, though.
Danbi is facing away from you, so doesn't even notice. She's your best friend - but she's been so busy with Tae and you so busy with Gguk that it feels like you've barely seen her recently.
It feels like you're losing everything you love into the abyss that Hayun is.
"Fucking witch," you scathe to yourself, earning you a confused look from the ajumma beside you. "Sorry. Not you."
She laughs a little. Points to her eyes, then yours. "So pretty," she says, and you know she's talking about your glitter and - oh, you don't mean to be such a mess, but you just can't help yourself when you start blubbering all over again.
Before you know it, you're sat with a gaggle of old women outside the CU, crying over Jeongguk while they give you fucking advice. It's all so mortifying. One of them rushes in and gets you some tissues for your mascara, while another insists on a slice of cake.
All dressed in mismatched florals and gilets, with perms to rival poodles, they're happily talking about your drama because "Eunyeon divorced her husband six years ago and there's only so many times we can hear about his new girlfriend" - although the latest scandal is that he's now seducing the lady who works in the tailor shop around the corner from your apartment. It's why the gaggle of gals are here - they wanted to scope her out.
Instead, they're now cooing over a picture of Jeongguk, agreeing how handsome he is.
"Men like him were made to break hearts," one of them sighs, which earns her a swat against the arm from a friend.
"Oh, shush, Minsu," one of them tuts. Squeezes your hand. " You were made to break hearts too."
They all agree. Nod.
"If I were your age, and I looked like you, I'd have a new boyfriend every week!" Jinnae, the lady who first complimented you and invited you to her gossip session, says.
"I don't even want a boyfriend," you whine. "I just wanted to get over my ex."
This is a fatal error on your part, for they then demand to see Seokjin, too - and if there's one thing Seokjin does better than any other man, it's winning the hearts of women beyond a certain age.
You half think Minsu might have a heart attack when she sees him.
"Men didn't look like this back in my day," she sighs after she's caught her breath. "Oh, honey. I feel sorry for you. I really do."
The pity party continues until one of them notices Eunyeon - the jilted wife - across the road. They make for a speedy escape. Can't be caught spying. Insist you join them for tea next week. Given the fact you've lost both Jeongguk and Danbi to the devil incarnate, what other plans could you possibly have?
When you finally arrive home, you sigh. Kick your shoes off. Get changed, and head straight for the shower. Need to wash Jeongguk off your skin.
And as you take off your necklace and rest the bird by your sink, you can't help but feel disappointed in Jeongguk. A little used.
You've been using one another, granted, that's never been a secret - but you've helped each other. Progressing as people. Healing . Now? Just feels like he was biding his time until Hayun was interested in him again.
Sinking down the wall of your shower, you sit with your knees to your chest, holding them tightly.
Just like Jeongguk still is, in his bedroom, right where you left him.
Your phones both vibrate at the same time - his on his desk, yours by the sink. It's the big group chat. The one with everyone - except Hayun (thank God).
The Usual Suspects [MYG, JJK...(+8)]
Yoongi : May 6th.
Namjoon :... What of it?
Yoongi : You're busy.
Namjoon :...?
Jimin : It's like 4 months away???
Yoongi : So? Keep it free.
Taehyung : ???!!!!!!
Seoyeon : what my darling husband-to-be means to say, is..... save the date!!!
Seoyeon : we've booked our venue!!!!!
Jimin : oh, holy shit
Nabi : AHHHHHHHHHH
Jeongguk : FINALLY!!!!
You : stop, i'll cry omg
Seoyeon : the venue is small - we'll tell you more about it when we see you next, but it means no plus ones :(
Yoongi : You're all single losers anyways...
Taehyung : Ahem.
Yoongi : It's been two weeks.
Danbi : Still counts x
And even though today has proved to you that even the purest of hearts can become weaponised, true love still exists; and what an honour it is to witness it.
Maybe one day, you'll get to experience it.
For now, you'll tuck the bird necklace in your jewellery box and ignore Jeongguk when he finally texts. You've muted your chat. Still check it constantly. Just in case.
You wait all night.
He doesn't text.
Tumblr media
AO3 | MASTERLIST | MINORS DNI
95 notes · View notes
humanpurposes · 5 months ago
Text
Thoughts about Aemond in episode 2 and the Greens as a dysfunctional family (spoilers).
Preemptive apologies because I feel like this is a very ranty post. At the end of the day, none of this is real, it's not that deep, but I have a lot of thoughts. I actually really liked this episode overall, it was a huge improvement from last week for me! :)
There’s something unnerving and uncomfortable about the childlike state Aemond reverts to in the brothel, the way he's curled up in the woman's lap, the way he's trying to brag that Daemon sees him as a threat. The addition of the warm milk was a bit too on the nose for me, yikes.
As we've seen with Aegon and Helaena, Aemond doesn’t get a lot of emotional support from Alicent, especially with the tensions between them after he killed Luke. She obviously cares about her children and wants to protect them. She's the only one who defended Aemond on Driftmark, she tries repeatedly to comfort Helaena, she put herself between Aegon and Meleys, but as we can clearly see, the Green faction fundamentally struggles to connect with each other. Alicent’s failure to offer emotional support to her children has trickled into their relationships with each other. That scene of her walking out on Aegon crying as a mirror of Aegon and Helaena hardly able to speak a word to each other on the staircase… pain.
Just as Otto used Alicent as a pawn for his own political advancement, Alicent's children take on their own roles, Aegon as the heir (now the King), Helaena as his Queen, Aemond as the second son, the fighter.
There's a lack of connection with his family, even with Criston Cole, the only other person Aemond seems close with, he can't fully let go of this facade, which is actually why I love his insane little smile when he talks about Alicent usurping the throne, it's like he slips into saying what he truly thinks but he's still holding back.
What we're seeing in the brothel scene is Aemond seeking intimacy in the only way he thinks he can. It's not sexual, he doesn't seem to desire this woman. He wants to voice his inner thoughts to someone who won't hold it against him.
I do question why the showrunners chose to portray Aemond's vulnerability in such an... awkward way. There are plenty of viewers who already sympathise with Aemond having seen his trauma as a child, just as there are plenty of viewers who despise him for the things he does, so what purpose does this scene really serve?
I wonder if this is an attempt on the part of the showrunners to expose the Greens as hypocrites. Aemond has his "decent men for no taste for depravity" line in 1.9, then PLOT TWIST he likes to be babied by his favourite prostitute. Aemond is my favourite fictional boy, I support him being an edgelord, twink, war criminal, but I can't take this character seriously when his nephew has just been murdered, his sister is traumatised and he's like "omg Daemon wanted to slay me in my beddd 🥰 he's so scared of me 😌😈" Actually, I find it interesting that Aemond doesn't have many moments with his family, even when Jaehaerys has just died, it makes me think that Aemond fundamentally sees himself as an outsider. Maybe he's never brought himself to trust Aegon for bullying him, he has to be protective of himself.
I think I feel a similar way to this scene as I do about every scene with Alicent and Cole. It's not unexpected per se, it seems like a logical progression in their characters and I like the idea in principle, but the execution in both instances hasn't hit the mark for me. Alicent and Cole's sex scenes have cheapened the connection that was clearly there between them in season 1, and the brothel scene to me feels unnecessary.
60 notes · View notes