#we're getting so spoilt right now

[morweneledhwen]

While IQIYI is currently going wild with all its new drama announcements at the iJOY Conference 2024, we're also getting a new poster for The Southern Archives (南部档案).

[nature-played-a-trick-on-me]

Went for a walk w the bf today and he said he's starting to better understand the sort of stuff I've gone through with my dad and his gf and the effects that it still has on me today

[loganlermanstanaccount]

Hello! Could you please write a stubborn, jealous hc for Miguel o'hara? Thank you!!

I had the brainworms, so I hope this is what you were looking for! Thanks for the ask <3

Jealous!Miguel O'Hara Headcanons

(AO3 Mirror), Main Masterlist

pairing: jealous!Miguel O'Hara x reader

summary: stubborn HCs for jealous!Miguel O'Hara. 

a/n: this was meant to be a drabble and i basically wrote a full fic. i have zero self control lmfao

warnings: smut (fingering, f receiving oral, slight brat taming, etc) right at the very end, 18+ from then onwards, the rest is more pg-13

wc: 3.5k ish

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Long story short: he's a stubborn little shit.

Pig-headed as fuck and it shows up in little things. 

Let's say you first met as coworkers, and you were a lab technician at Alchemax. 

Think: unstoppable force meets immovable object. He likes his labs just so, with very specific equipment in a very specific configuration. 

It drives you crazy, regularly having tiffs outside the labs; much to the chagrin of your coworkers. 

"Jesus." Your coworker mutters, wincing at the seemingly heated argument by the water cooler. 

"Ignore it, Maeve." Another coworker rolls their eyes, nudging Mave with a snort. "They're at it again . S'pose they'll tire each other out by the end of the day."

Not that they were wrong. But this time, it wasn't your fault: dealing with O'Hara's bullshit had really taken it's toll. He was insufferable, prone to nitpicking and just plain mean. You could hardly be blamed if you gave him some of your own choice words. 

"My notes were basically paint-by-fucking-numbers!  How could you mess up a simple distillation? When I specify precision glassware , you don't think that's fucking important?" 

"Your notes ," You draw air quotes pointedly at him. "-are illegible, you fucking cretin! Maybe if you didn't write like a goddamn pre-schooler-"

"- preschooler? Oh , fuck you!" 

"Get your nose out of that highschool Chem textbook, O'Hara, this is a fucking job."

"Yeah? Stop using it to wipe your ass and you might learn a thing or two."

"Oh , so that's what we're doing?" You laugh in his face, so angry your hand curls into tight fists. You get close, staring him down as you look upwards through your lashes. His own face is contorted into a grimace; bushy eyebrows furrowed into deep shadows around his eyes. You can feel his steady breathing before he speaks, low and rumbling. 

"I could do this all day, princesa. " 

You scoff, ignoring the way his words weaken your knees. The one time you asked for a break during a long lab and he won't stop calling you a spoilt princess. His laughter then stings in your ears now, the ghost of a smirk on his face as you storm off. Miguel O'Hara: smug bastard. He would be the death of you, you're sure. 

~~~

You spend many a late night with him, unwittingly, and find out he's more than a stubborn little shit. 

You find out he's funny, and shares the same anti-Alchemax tendencies you do: both preyed upon by the company immediately after graduation, young and naive. 

He's kind, even though he'd never admit it, often finishing up the lab notes and doing more than his fair share of work so you can go home at a reasonable time. 

You both still butt heads, but it turns into a tentative friendship - coffees in the morning hidden as blaise convenience, covering for each other at work, and defending the other when office gossip goes too far. 

That's why when he comes back to work after a week-long stint away - something about a blow up with the boss, an issue described as 'miscommunication, promptly smoothed over' by anyone official - you notice… something's different about him. 

You first noticed something was off when he walked in without a snide remark. You left a mug overnight at the counter, something that would usually draw a sarcastic comment at the least , but he gives you… nothing. Blank, glassy eyes as he opens up his workstation - clicking away at the keys without so much as a glance.

"O'Hara?" You call, but he doesn't even look up. You walk to his workstation and knock at the desk. He jumps. God, he looks worse for the wear. Heavy bags under his eyes and a bruise blossoming under his collar. 

"You okay?" 

He rubs his temples, eyes flitting up at you.  "Yeah, just…. just a long week, s'all." 

You put a hand on his shoulder, and you swear he leans into your touch. "We can reschedule, tonight. The calculations can wait, Miguel."

He gives you a weak smile, but a smile nevertheless. "S'okay. Need to make sure you don't fuck it up."

"Don't push your luck, O'Hara."

~~~

As you get closer, you notice just how stubborn he is to admit the growing tension between you two. 

Late nights at the lab turn into takeout at your place, morning coffee turns into a pleasant 20 minutes on the rooftop away from the hustle and bustle - just you and Miguel, talking and joking with a cup of shitty coffee in hand. 

Wholly, he seems more assertive at work, not as quick to roll over. 

It's hot, you have to admit; watching him fight with someone else other than you. 

You're at work drinks with the other technicians and engineers, nursing a watery beer when another colleague makes small talk with you at the bar.

You’ve never been that close to him, and the conversation is amicable enough, but you’re almost bowled over when you see Miguel, in the corner, staring straight at you with a stormy look.

You suppose it's a little pathetic, getting all dressed up for a casual drink. Lips shiny with gloss and gently powdered with makeup, you feel a little out of place. For all your talk at work, actually being here was another thing. Suddenly, your blouse is too tight and your skirt too short. With a manicured finger, you trace the lip of your glass filled with watery beer. You sigh. You don't want to admit it, but you were only here because of Miguel. He said he would come, and now you're sitting on a barstool counting the chips in your glass. 

It was probably for the best. You sink into the absentminded chatter of your colleagues around you, until there's a tap at your shoulder. 

"Is someone-" He clears his throat; a tall man dressed in a sharp suit nodding gracefully towards the empty chair. "-is this seat taken?" 

You shake your head, grateful for the company. He's handsome, sharp features curving into a wry grin as he calls for a drink. 

"...and something other than shitty beer for the pretty girl, too." It makes you laugh, light and lilting in the bustle of the bar. 

He stretches out his hand, and you take it. 

"Eddie Crouch. I work in marketing."

Eddie…. as in… head of the most profitable division of Alchemax? Your eyes widen involuntarily and you try to clamp down your immediate shock, somewhat unsuccessfully. He narrows his eyes as you tumble over your words. 

"Y-Yeah, same! I mean, not same , I just work in the l-labs and I thought it was just for us guys, working behind the curtain, y'know? Not that we're not thrilled to have you here, because we a-are." You spill out, wincing. "....Is this about the performance reviews? Because I know output was down this quarter but our projections are-"

"I'm not here to talk about work." He chuckles. You squint, not convinced. As if to alleviate your concerns, he loosens his tie and undoes his top buttons with a flourish. 

"Can I tell you a secret?" He leans in, and the air becomes thick with expensive perfume. He twirls the signet ring on his finger, a ring probably worth more than your monthly paycheck. 

"Your boss invited me," Discreetly, he stretches a finger at your boss; a man ruddy cheeked and red-faced with alcohol. "Guess he thought it would boost morale. He's a fucking idiot if he thinks having me, the one guy that could fire your entire department without recourse, exchange empty platitudes would boost morale. But, I digress. So here I am, dragging my feet to this bar, thinking I'm gonna get in, read the lines and get out. But then, " He pauses with dramatic effect. "I see the most beautiful person I've ever had the pleasure of laying my eyes on, just sitting by the bar. Like everyone isn't already falling over themselves to talk to you."

The irony is palpable. It's sickly sweet, and a line that wouldn't usually work on you. But usually, you weren't pining over a man so prickly and stubborn, you shouldn't have feelings for. Here you were, bright cocktail in front of you and a moderately attractive man by your side. He wasn't quite Miguel, but in the words of one of the greatest thinkers of the past age: country girls make do. 

And so you make lazy conversation with the man. So lost in a tipsy haze, you barely notice Miguel walk in; dark jacket on his shoulders and deliciously loose slacks. You're drawn to him, his eyes seemingly searching the room, and you sigh into your drink. Technically, he looks like shit: eyes dark-rimmed and sunken, a cut at his brow. You think he is gorgeous, eyes tracing the slope of his nose and plush lips. Like he can sense it, he glances over in your direction and you look away hastily. He's watching , you can feel its burn as you turn, pretending to listen to the man besides you. A little cruelly, you lean into him, not breaking eye contact and curling a hand around his arm to laugh at a stupid joke. Eddie laughs with you, oblivious, as you glance behind him. 

Miguel stands with a drink thrust into his hands, looking straight through him, eyes low and gazing at you. 

~~~

He insists on walking you home, a steady hand on the small of your back as you stumble through the streets of Nueva York.

You make light conversation, tipsy and giggly from the alcohol. Miguel seems a little more put together, but his chest still creaks with rumbling laughter.

He definitely walks on the side of the pavement nearest the street, because he thinks it keeps you safer. 

He walks you up the stairs and by the door of your apartment, like a gentleman. You watch him get nervous suddenly, and he hesitates, stubbornly digging in his heels and pausing you from opening the door and coming in. 

You don't want it to end, opting to take the walk up the stairs as opposed to the lift. It's one of your more questionable decisions as you stumble up the stairs, almost tripping over your own feet. Miguel is quick to catch you even though he was just as drunk. Arm around your waist, he leaves searing touches to your hip. You giggle despite yourself, and he can't help but smile at your clumsiness. 

"If you break your legs I won't carry you, princesa ." A lie and you both know it. He would carry you to the ends of the earth like a blushing bride, if you asked him. 

You both stagger to up the stairs and through the corridor until you reach your front door. You rummage around your bag for your keycard, it's contents click-clacking in the quiet of the hallway. Miguel watches, quieter than he was in the journey. If you looked up now, you would see something else behind his eyes - a storm of apprehension and tension. 

You find your keycard, and look up to find Miguel placing a careful palm on the door. He's surprisingly still, eyes on your lips as he steps closer. You look everywhere but to meet his eyes, tracing the curve of his collarbone, the slope of his exposed forearm, and the tempting juncture of his strong jaw. You watch it tense, as he brings a gentle hand to your chin. His thumb swipes over the fat of your lip. 

"Got somethin' right… there." He mumbles, before tucking his hand away. You can barely breathe. Without thinking you take his hand in yours, lacing your fingers together like a gentle hug. You bring his hand to your waist, and he squeezes, ever so gently. Your hand drops and he moves his slowly, knuckles dragging along the smooth silk of your blouse, and then sending shivers when he reaches your bare neck. 

He has to bite down the plethora of things running through his head - his drunken brain threatening to spill all his thoughts. You are so beautiful and soft it makes him short-circuit, desperate to pull you close. Instead, you do: hand inching up his chest and laying to rest on his shoulders. 

He kisses you, finally ; a little messy and impossibly soft. Like his lips on yours would shatter you both. You deepen the kiss and wrap his arm tighter around you, angling your chin to drink up even more of you. You both come up for air, panting in the heat of one another. Miguel's eyes are full of lust and blown out. 

"Do…do you want to come in?" You whisper. 

Something catches in his throat and his expression changes, like he just woke up from a dream. Do you just want to sleep with him? He's not built for one night stands, can't do just sex, especially if it's you. No matter how much he wants to, he can't, he won't, "....I shouldn't."

The disappointment on your face is palpable. You want to ask why - after he kissed you like that - why doesn't he want you? Instead you nod dejectedly. He gives you a chaste kiss on the forehead, lingering, and a shaky smile. 

You open your door with a buzz, and slam it in his face. 

~~~

It takes Miguel some time to properly put a name to what you two have: not knowing if the kiss was a drunken mistake, animal attraction or something more. 

He's not a grand gestures kind of person, he believes in action rather than words. 

Which is why it takes so long for him to admit just how in love with you he is. 

He steals glances at you all the time at the office, and tries to anticipate  all your needs. 

When you stretch and yawn in the morning, he happens to pass by your favourite coffee place and happens to buy one too many cups of your go-to order. 

So imagine his shock when he arrives from his lunch break, churros and coffee in hand, and there's one of the top brass from the night at the bar perched on your desk - 2 polystyrene cupfuls of something half drunk on the desk. 

He's never been insecure, but he can't help but feel possessive, something tense and tight growing at the base of his stomach. 

"What was it you wanted to talk about?" You step into the equipment cupboard, Miguel close behind you. You rub your temples, anticipating an argument. "O'Hara, if this is about my calibration tests this morning, I swear to God -" 

"No, no , nothing like that." He's quick to say. "They were… okay." He strains. 

You raise an eyebrow. Okay? Since when did Miguel pass up an opportunity for a mindless fight? Your mind races with his actions of the past few days. He has been different since the night at the bar, a little nicer, sure, but nothing this out of the ordinary. 

"That guy you were talking to. I saw him at the bar, and now here. Who is he?" 

Your eyebrows shoot up. "You do not have the right to ask me th-" 

"Are you fucking him?" A pause, and you study his expression, deducing that he is completely fucking serious . 

"Are you insane? You definitely don't have the right to ask me that." You make for the door, and he steps in front of it, blocking it with his body. 

"I need to know. Tell me and then I'll leave you alone, I promise." His voice is low and thick with something. 

You step closer and he wraps his hands around your waist absentmindedly. The pressure feels good, and makes your brain fog up. 

He repeats himself, softer. "Are you fucking him?" 

You look at him for a moment, before shaking your head. His facial expression  is steady, just as unreadable. 

"Do you want to?" 

You hesitate, wanting to be cruel and say yes, just to see his reaction. Perceptive, he sees your hesitance and says something that almost knocks you over. 

"I could fuck you better than he ever could," He kneads your thigh now, lips close to the shell of your ear in the tight space of the cupboard. " Princesa , look at me." 

You look at him, almost whimpering and putty in his hands. He's like a siren and you are lost in the pull of his gaze. It may be the proximity, but you swear you see a tinge of red in his eyes, like deep pools of lust. 

"Will you let me fuck you?" He pulls you closer so the meat of his thigh presses against your clothed cunt. Your stretchy pencil skirt rides up suggestively, and you rock your clit against him, searching for sweet pressure. You nod. 

Miguel titters softly, a hand on your chin pulling your lips to his. You moan into his kiss, body aching. It's hot and heavy like the kiss outside your door, but he swirls his tongue around yours and expertly nips at your lower lip. He guides your hips to rock against his thigh, tensing to make sure it's corded muscle hits the right places. He wants to break you apart, leave you so cock-drunk, you wouldn't think of even glancing at another man. 

You separate and he dips a hand under your skirt. He pulls it up and places a big palm at your pussy, with a well timed slap. You bite into his neck with the pressure. You definitely don't expect it when he rips open your stockings like they were paper. 

"Fuck, Miguel." 

"It's okay, baby, I'll get you new ones." Your eyes roll back as he slips aside the gusset to run a finger through your lower lips. Shamelessly, he slips a finger in, then two, basking in the wet squelch of your heat. You claw at his forearm, as he curls them into that sweet spot. 

You press your forehead to his shoulder, chasing his fingers with your hips. His sharp eyes watch every movement, every stutter and start that his fingers pull from you. He's practical, a man of action, and he is desperate to show you how much he cares. 

"I've thought about you… about this." He hisses as you cover your mouth to dampen your moans. 

"Wanted you for so long, princesa. Want to know how you taste, what this beautiful pussy feels like. What you look like when you cum."

His wrist aches with the back and forth motion but his pace barely faulters. 

" M-Miguel …"

He applies pressure to your clit, and watches in awe as you spasm, nails digging into his forearm. 

" Oh, there it is. Right there, hmm? Does that feel good?" 

You nod frantically with a stifled sob. 

"Not quite, baby. Need to hear you say it. Or I won't let you cum."

"...fuuck you."

" Oh, you'd like that. Still not what I want to hear. Tell me how much you like it when I fuck you with my fingers."

"F-Feels good." You stutter. He stops, wrenching his hand out of your pussy to leave you clenching around nothing.You almost scream.

"You're being a brat, not my princesa , hmm? Only good girls get to cum."

" Miguel , please. I'll do anything." He guides you along his thigh, still lodged between your legs, and licks up your wetness on his other hand. "You m-make me feel so good. So good. And I want you so much it hurts, sometimes. I just want to cum, don't even need your cock. Fuck me with something , please." 

"Miguel? Not asshole? Or fucking idiot, this time?" 

"Please, Miguel ." Your pleas go straight to his cock. He throbs with need, cock rock hard under his slacks. 

He relents, not able to bear your dopey puppy-dog eyes for much longer. He slips three fingers in, without bothering to prep you. He hisses at the tightness of your heat, pounding into you and knuckle deep with his fingers. Shamelessly, you fuck yourself back on them, hips rolling over his thigh. He can't tear himself away from the sight, palming himself through tented trousers. 

You kiss and nip at his neck, as he whispers obscenities at you under his breath. 

"Can you cum for me, princesa? Cum f'me, and I'll take care of you, I promise."

You clamp down on his fingers and moan into a kiss as you ride out your orgasm. It's intense: leg-shaking and leaves you shuddering in the aftermath. You were rusty, sure, hadn't had sex with someone in a while. But Miguel made you cum so hard you saw stars, with only his fingers. Your chest heaves with the thought. 

You thought he would leave you, torn stockings and all, in the little cupboard. But he stays, to sink down to his knees and lap at your folds. You rest a hand on a shelf for purchase, head back in bliss. You cunt is still sensitive, throbbing at the orgasm he's just given you, as you licks you clean. He's taking care of you. You card your hands into his hair, tugging gently as he moans into your pussy. 

He gives your clit a gentle kiss, and swipes up a trailing tear that rolls down your inner thigh. You watch as he pops his fingers into your mouth, cleaning off the cum. Your cum. 

Miguel gives you a lazy grin in the bare bulb of the equipment closet. He seems completely unfazed by the fact his fingers were in you not a moment ago. 

"Are you free after work?" He asks, and it takes a moment for you to process. 

"Uhhh… s-sure. Probably?" 

"Let me take you for dinner, somewhere nice."

All you can do is nod, dumbly, ripped stockings still around your ankles. 

"And then I can fuck you properly, princesa." 

_

_

_

[emotionallyattachednerd]

Stress Release | IDW Rodimus x f!robot reader | NSFW 18+

Word count: 1100+

Warnings: Smut ( desk and rough interfacing ), dom reader, sub Rodimus, control play, mummy kink and licking. NSFW 18+.

Notes: This went completely different to what I had planned from the start but I'm honestly very happy how it turned out. First attempt in writing Hot Rod/Rodimus. I love that flame boy! Also taking notice I've been managing to keep my requests within 1k, for now at least. Enjoy this hot stuff. 🥰

☕ Coffee

"Desk. Now."

Rodimus had barged into your office so suddenly, barking the order so bluntly that it made you snort a giggle. He's horny. Your conjunx is always damn horny in the weirdest of times, you find it quite adorable.

"Why?" You choose to tease as you keep your focus on the data pad in your servos, pretending you didn't notice what the fuss was all about.

"You're kidding, right?" His wounded expression almost makes you cave, but not quite. "Look at me! I'm all heated up and it's bothering me. I need to frag, like right now. Magnus has been up my aft all day!" You have to cover your mouth to stop yourself from bursting out laughing from his poor choice of words. "Not like that! Come on! Just a quick frag, that's all I need."

"Is fragging all I'm good for?" You set the data pad aside and lean back in your chair, leg crossing over the other on top of your thigh as you gave a lingering intense stare at him.

His shoulders slump down, defeated and letting out a heavy vent. "N-no, no, of course not, you're so much more than that. Please I just....please?" You could hear him beg all day.

Standing up you slowly make your way around the table and sit on top of it. Rodimus smiles like a giddy sparkling and skips over to you, though you stop him with the end of your pede, sly smile on your face.

"Easy now cowboy. Mama would like an apology."

"For what? What did I do?"

"You were very rude just then, demanding me to get on the desk like a spoilt brat. Mama doesn't like it when you get all bossy." Your voice was like silk, smooth and tender, yet also very controlling that latches onto him in a vise grip. Rodimus knows what you're doing.

"Really? We're doing this now? Thought that game was only for inside our quarters."

"What's wrong? Afraid for anyone to see just how you fall apart under your mama? Besides, you love it, me being bossy. You can't help yourself."

Gently you rub his heated panel with your pede, earning a startled whimper from him, causing you to smirk softly from his falling apart reaction just by a simple rub. The guy had zero self control over himself sometimes.

When he doesn't say anything, you add on. "Now, are you going to behave?" Though you do enjoy him playing the spoilt brat, you were pretty eager for a good hard frag as well. You just need to teach him some manners first.

"Yes...mama." Rodimus meets your gaze, optics fuzzy and cheek plating heated with a pink hue, giving him such a soft cuteness.

"Good boy."

Moving your pede you move it up against his chassis and rest it in a good flexible position under his chin. One thing he loves about you is just how well you can flex and bend yourself.

"Lick. Apologise to your mama."

Rodimus always wants to please you, and he never fails. Leaning down, he drags his warm glossa against your pede, kissing and licking the area at your command, sliding his glossa over your wheel and making it swivel a little. You smile, giddy with pride, loving the sight of him wanting to keep you happy.

"I'm sorry, mama." He whispers, soft baby blue optics moving up to look at you in the most innocent and cutest way.

"You're forgiven, darling." You move your pede off and sit back down, thighs parted with panel cover retracted and revealing your already soaking valve. "Now, you're after some stress release?"

"Yes, please." He vented heavily, the sight of you almost makes him overload right there standing. "Please mama, I'm begging you."

"Since you asked so nicely." You purr out in delight before taking hold of his waist with both your pedes, tugging him closer against you and grinding yourself against his hot covering. "Come on big boy, fill your mama. Don't hold back."

His broad, goofy smile is something you'll always lust after. You watch as his panel retracts and his throbbing spike bobs out, intensely hot and screaming for action. He doesn't hold back and spreads your thighs even wider, pressing himself against you as you keep yourself on the desk, right before he bluntly thrusts his thick length into your waiting and eager valve.

The desk shakes as he impales you firmly without holding back, just as you commanded. There's no pause and he sets a rough pace, thrusting his cable into you through an intense rut that is boiling through him.

Tightening your thighs, you hold on while letting out rowdy moans that fill the room, mixing in with his rigid grunts and hitched vents. You feel every bumpy ridge running across your channel, pulsing wildly like a rapid fire, sending bursts and sparks up through your entire frame.

"So good! Roddy, oh frag!"

"Oh mama, fragging good mama!"

In the room, you both always got creative, to keep things spicy between you both and the thrill to keep on rolling. You loved him, so much. He deserved the best and you're happy to provide that however possible.

His servos hold firmly at your waist as he drags you back against him with each thrust delivered, your flooding lubricants pooling against the rocking desk and dripping down onto the floor between his thrusts, fragging you thoroughly, and grinding his pelvic plating against your sensitive node.

He buries his face against your neck, dentas nibbling against your neck cables and holding you close as you embrace his roaring heat, thighs clenching tightly as your valve does too, sucking him whole.

Rodimus has been fighting with himself and holding back for as long as possible, until he simply couldn't control it anymore.

"Mama...mama!" He chants, hips rutting firmly against you before overloading, his thrusts still present to make sure you overload yourself, which proved to be easier as you don't keep yourself lingering behind and let out a thundering mewl and clinging onto him.

Your overoad bursts out heavily, your hips still grinding against him as you ride it out as you both let your cooling fans kick in and vent through the intense frag you just had.

His spike remains inside, twitching madly, making you whimper through your desire and reach your servo up to caress his cheek plating. "You're so big Roddy, filling mama so much with your fluids. I think you'll spark me for sure this time."

The talk about sparklings has happened, but with different wars happening, it wasn't the best time to raise one. Though that doesn't slow either of you down from fragging. Anything could happen.

"Oh darling, I fragging love you so much!" Rodimus praises his worshipping over you before taking your face under his servos and kissing you passionately, devouring your lips and coiling his glossa with your own with an intense greed.

Moving away together you let out a silky giggle and nuzzle your face into his neck, embracing the hot mech you call your conjunx endura as you feel his spike nest comfortably inside you.

"I love you too, Roddy, my handosme hot flame."

[writtenbymisunderstoodnerds]

The date (Sofia Huerta x Reader)

As requested this is part two of Not my best idea

I'm hoping to start working through some of my requests, but don't hold me to that, life is a bit busy at the moment.

I'm sick so this is not really edited. Hope you enjoy :)

Warnings: None

Words: 2.2K

There was a knock on my door at exactly 6pm. Sofia was waiting on the other side with a single red rose. I smiled as she handed me the rose, feeling butterflies erupt. Normally, I was the one giving flowers or organising dates. It was a nice change, but not something I wanted regularly. I loved organising dates and spoiling the women I was taking out. It was my love language.

"How long were you waiting outside to get here right on time?" I teased as Sofia blushed.

"Maybe a few minutes. I'm sorry I didn't get you more than one rose. You deserve the best, but the shop I went to only had ones that didn't look great."

"Don't be, I kinda dig the one rose. Let me get my jacket and we're good to go."

"You uh look good by the way."

I took a second to look Sofia up and down, taking her in. She had on black jeans, a plain white t-shirt, and a black leather jacket draped across her arm. Sofia looked beautiful, even though it wasn't anything extravagant. I didn't really like fancy first dates or fancy dates in general so Sofia had reluctantly agreed to a more casual date even though according to Sofia, I deserved to be spoilt. It was a warm night so I followed Sofia's lead, draping my jacket over my arm before taking hers as well.

Sofia protested, telling me she could carry her own jacket, but I shrugged, cutting her off, "You look good too Sof, like really good."

She blushed, clearing her throat, "Thank you. Shall we?"

I laughed, arm wrapping around her shoulder, "You're cute when you're nervous. Let's go."

We walked down the street hand in hand. Sofia was trying her best to hide the nerves, but her twitching fingers, the way she kept wiping her spare hand on her pants, and the way she wasn't speaking, gave away her nerves. "You know I don't bite. Well, unless you're into that."

Sofia turned red, looking away briefly, "Sorry, you just make me really nervous."

"You already embarrassed yourself and I kissed you regardless, so there's no reason to be nervous."

She groaned, covering her face with her free hand, "You don't need to remind me. I just want to impress you."

"Oh no, that'll be my go-to story. I'm just a regular person, you don't need to impress me. If I wasn't already impressed with you, I wouldn't have agreed to go out with you so please just take a breath and try to relax. Think you can do that for me?"

"I can try."

We stopped at a Mexican food truck, each ordering our food. Sofia paid before I had the chance to protest. I hated people buying me things even if it was just food. I pushed that discomfort aside as best as possible to enjoy the date. It was something I could bring up later if needed. 

When we sat down to eat, I asked Sofia a few questions about being a professional athlete and her love for soccer. Knowing she was nervous, I decided to ask easier questions for now until she relaxed a bit. The more in-depth or family questions could wait. Sofia rambled on about her job with me listening intently. I was genuinely interested in what she had to say. The slight rasp in her voice already sucking me in. I knew I could listen to her talk for hours and not get bored.

Sofia's cheeks flushed light pink when she realised my attention was completely on her, "Sorry. Enough about me, what about you? Why did you become a lifeguard?"

"Don't apologise, I like hearing you talk about it. I can see how much you love what you do. Um, I never actually planned on being a lifeguard, it's only been a few months, but I enjoy it more than I thought."

Talking about myself felt awkward, something I was never very good at. I knew I should say more, I just kinda clammed up due to the awkwardness and not knowing what to say. It was definitely easier when more specific questions were asked.

Sofia giggled in response before asking, "What did you do before being a lifeguard? I assume you were doing something being 2- actually, I don't know how old you are. Sorry that was kinda rude wasn't it?"

I laughed at her getting flustered again. Some people probably would have found it rude how she asked. I was just entertained.

"You're okay. I'm 27 by the way. I was a wedding/family photographer before, well I still am and I'll go back to it. I just needed a bit of a break. Being a photographer is great, I do genuinely love it, but I was fully booked most of the time, traveling to many different states constantly. It got a bit overwhelming, I was burnt out and exhausted. Obviously, you need money to live so I couldn't just quit. My aunt owns this hotel and when I confided in her how I was feeling, she offered me the lifeguard job for as long as I wanted it. So yeah, I'll go back soon, maybe experiment with a different kind of photography while I have this job as a backup."

Sofia winked, squeezing my hand, "You make a very attractive lifeguard. Bet you're just as attractive with a camera. Maybe you should try sports photography. In all seriousness, I'm glad you got the break you needed, I understand how exhausting traveling can be. I would love to see some of your work sometime if that's okay?"

"You flatter me Sof. I have actually thought about sports photography, maybe you can be my practice. Also, I have a whole Instagram of my work you can look at."

"I would love to be your practice."

We spent another ten or so minutes at the food truck, Sofia scrolling through my Instagram while I sat there awkwardly due to the compliments. After a while, Sofia took my hand, dragging me away from the food truck. I managed to tone down my excitement when we stopped outside the arcade. "How did you know I liked arcades?"

"Um, I may have stalked your Instagram."

"Stalker."

---

For being a professional athlete, Sofia was surprisingly bad at throwing a basketball. I stood behind her, hands covering her hands, guiding her to throw the ball into the net. Sofia jumped excitedly, picking up the next ball.

"You're not pretending this time are you?"

"Unfortunately not."

My hands trailed down to her hips, settling maybe a little lower than they should. Sofia didn't stop me, instead leaning back into me. "Try yourself now."

Sofia missed again, leaning back into me with a groan, "How are you so good at this?"

I shrugged, guiding her to throw the ball again, "I dabble."

"In basketball?"

"Also volleyball and boxing currently. Soccer when I was a teenager."

"Wow. Where do you play?"

"It's just fun, mostly with my friends, sometimes like a fun community thing. I used to play more seriously in high school."

We spent a few hours at the arcade, playing all the games and getting to know each other. Touches became more frequent and confident on both sides as time went on. There weren't any proper kisses yet, only a few cheek or hand kisses. Don't get me wrong, I really wanted to kiss her and her lingering looks on my lips gave me the idea she wanted to as well. We were in public though so I decided to wait. PDA wasn't really my thing. Sofia was also a public figure which meant we had to be a little more careful.

It was about 10:30pm when we decided to head back. Sofia had the day off tomorrow, but I still had to work from mid-morning so I didn't want to be out too late. Sofia leaned against the wall of the hotel, playing with my fingers. "I had a really good time tonight. Do you want to come back to my room?"

I stepped closer, practically trapping her against the wall. "Me too," I whispered, leaning in capturing her lips with mine. My hand rested low on her hip, hers cupping the back of my neck as I deepened the kiss. Sofia's tongue ran along my lip, trying to coax them apart, but I pulled away before she could. "You are making me blur every boundary I created for pre and post-first dates."

"Sorry."

"No, you're not."

Sofia smirked, leaving a lingering kiss against my lips, "Not really. You're fun to be around and an incredible kisser Y/n, but I also don't want you to do anything you don't want to do or aren't ready to do."

"I never would, you'll soon learn I'm very stubborn. I'll come to your room, but things stay PG 13."

"Deal."

---

"Can I see you again?" Sofia asked, playing with my hair as I lay next to her, head resting on my hand so I could down at her.

"You're fun to be around, I really enjoy spending time with you-"

Sofia frowned before smiling sadly, "There's a but coming isn't there? It's okay if you're not interested in anything more than tonight, I had a great time regardless."

"No, it's not that, I would love to see you again. This isn't necessarily a deal breaker and I probably should have thought about this sooner. I know you're staying in the hotel for camp or whatever, but where do you actually live? Like uh, how far away are you from me?"

She giggled, pecking my lips quickly, "I thought I was the nervous one. To answer your question, about 25 minutes with no traffic."

"Wait really? Why are you staying at a hotel then?"

"Camp rules, better for team morale and bonding."

This time I leaned down, initiating a mini make-out session. It had been a week or so of knowing Sofia and I already knew I was screwed. I was drawn to her, she made me giddy and touchy. She was also a really good kisser, I already didn't want to leave. "In that case, I would love to see you again on one condition."

"What's that?"

"You let me plan the next date."

Sofia kissed me softly, "Anything as long as I get to do that some more."

---

Sofia and I had talked for a while last night before falling asleep cuddled up. Unfortunately, I didn't get to see her this morning because I had to get ready for work. As much as I wanted to wish her a good morning, I had managed to slip out without waking her, sending a text to assure her I had just bailed on her.

About midday, the group of women I was used to seeing entered the pool area, each claiming their lounger. My eyes met Sofia's sending her a soft smile as I approached the group.

"Good morning ladies, how are we today? Can I get you anything?"

"Morning Y/n, all is good. Are the umbrellas out today?"

"That was next on the list, I'll grab them for ya now."

Emily smirked, nudging Sofia's shoulder, "Sof will help."

I guess they didn't know about our date. It wasn't a big deal, I figured Sofia would tell them when she was ready. I chuckled turning to Sofia, "You don't have to, I got it."

Sofia looked at me for a second. A small, slightly shy smile was present before she spoke softly, "I don't mind."

Once we were away from the group, I discreetly squeezed her hand, "How did you sleep beautiful?"

Sofia smiled, squeezing my hand again, "Amazingly. You should know, you were there."

"Sorry, I had to slip out early. I didn't want to wake you up on your day off."

Sofia's hand rest on my arm, seemingly not caring if anyone saw, "It's okay. Was a bit disappointed not to get a kiss when I woke up. Maybe you could make that up to me now?"

"What about them? I assume they don't know about our date."

"They don't, but that was so they didn't annoy me about it while I was so nervous. Please don't tell them about how it happened yet. I can't face that yet."

I laughed, already imagining how much fun it would be to expose that down the line. However, right now Sofia was looking up at me expectantly. I cupped her cheek, lips connecting in a lingering kiss. I heard yelling from behind us as I pulled away, pecking her lips one more time. "That's all you get because you're technically a customer right now and I will get in trouble if I get caught."

Sofia pouted, but I refused to give in, shaking my head in response. Just because my boss was my aunt, doesn't mean I wouldn't actually get in trouble. "Fine. Do you want to come over again tonight?"

"I would love to."

We made our way back with the umbrellas, instantly being interrogated by Emily. "What the fuck did we miss? How did you go from a stuttering, red mess to kissing her overnight?"

Sofia shrugged, "We just talked after you guys left yesterday then ended up on a date last night."

Unfortunately, more people started showing up so I had to go back to my spot. I would have loved staying there with her and her team, but getting to watch her relaxing in a bikini, knowing I got to be with her after work, made it more tolerable. 

[yanderehsr]

Yandere Phantylia who's favorite benefactor is you <3 Paimon reader is surrounded by her platonic yanderes protecting her from Phantylia. Even when Phantylia made a deal to let the luofu live for now but for the price of keeping you with her, Jing yuan lowkey said "no f u we're keeping her! >:("

Paimon sure is popular, can't escape her even in Honkai Star Rail😄

Trigger Warning: Yandere, Obsessive behaviour, Possessive behaviour

Oh, Panthylia couldn't get enough of you, you were her favorite benefactor and favorite entertainment, she would keep you in a cage to entertain her for the rest of eternity, she aslo felt some weird form of connection, like you are favored by destruction.

It got her more curious so she tried to strike a deal with Jing Yuan, she would leave the Luofu alone for the rest of her eternal life and in exchange she would get you. She thought it would be a fair deal, but to her surprise Jing Yuan refused.

Like hell he would get rid of you, number one, it would get him killed by the others that are staring at him right now and second, you are his, there is no way he is giving you up to her or anyone, he has a nice little room waiting at home for you, where you can be spoilt like you deserve to be.

This battle will either end with Panthylia winning and then you will be forced to entertain her, because everything else seems boring to her when you are around. Or Jing Yuan and the others win and you will get your freedom, for a while atleast.

[balkanradfem]

I was trying to explain to my friend how all music from our country that is made by m*n is sexist, and was deconstructing the lyrics of some beloved, popular songs from the 90s. She told me I was the only person who would ever find fault in those songs, and acted like I was, in fact, a lunatic for dissecting every little thing to find offense in it. So I thought, you know what, I will bring this to my blog. Let the tumblrinas decide if I'm right.

So I will translate for you, some of our very beloved songs, in order to tell you what I think is wrong with them. If you're croatian, this will be funny, and you are allowed to correct my translation. I don't even hate these, they're incredibly catchy, but the lyrics are driving me insane.

Mary and Kate (youtube link) (1st verse) I thought the life was restaurants and dreams Friends, pretty women, for love to guide me And wherever I went, I didn't care I loved, never asked, through the world I drifted (chorus) Mary and Kate Where are they, to come back? My beautiful little Anne Who did you sleep with tonight? (2nd) I talked a lot, drank a lot, and laughed a lot I did this and that, everything, and always what I wanted And while I drifted, a crazy fool Pretty girls were all snatched by effortless cretins (chorus) (3rd) Where was I, what I was doing, who did I love? I was having fun, never lost my head I am still the same, I am the real one Real m*n goes, gives, never gets spoilt.

I no longer understand These young girls I am real for them They are not the real ones. I no longer understand What do they want? If only women were what they once were. (chorus) Mary and Kate Where are they, to come back? My beautiful little Anne Who did you sleep with tonight?

So you all can probably tell why this pisses me off, the chorus itself is giving me rage, but then the last bit just goes into full misogyny rant about women. It is obvious that this is a bullshit sicko man! He fancies himself as a 'vagabond' who just drifts around, drinks and has sex with women, and while he was young, it was working out for him and he could get young women to sleep with him, and then some time later, women obviously caught on onto the fact that he is a worthless drunk who doesn't do anything but party and bed women, incapable of being faithful or useful to anyone, and they've settled for males who, I would hope, are at least having a job and don't cheat or do alcohol all day. So as a response to that, he has to go and say 'wow women today are not real anymore, what do they want?? I am the real male obviously, m*n can never go bad, but all these women, they are unreal for not wanting me,' and then he proceeds to try and guilt trip MULTIPLE WOMEN AT ONCE for being on a location he doesn't know of, asking who they slept with! It's literally none of his business! He's literally not invested in any of these and will not contribute to their life in any manner except to give them a horrible time and to then proceed to look for his next victim, but they're being depicted as wrong and unreasonable. It's very obvious why no woman would look at him!

It makes me even more concerned that by the end of the song, he's no longer saying 'women', he's saying 'girls', indicating that now that he's older, he's interested in younger female demographic, but then also a verse later he had the GALL to call them 'not real women', if they're also not interested in him. In the end he even goes 'if only women were what they once were', by which he probably means, without any rights to reject him, without legal protection, only that way he could get whatever he would want from them.

My friend told me I'm supposed to just 'not listen to the lyrics' but m*n are listening to these lyrics! And agreeing! And if we're also acting uncritically, they're taking it as a sign that we also agree! A m*n wrote these!! It got mega popular!! And the song itself is so damn catchy it's been playing in my head all damn day. Someone needs to say something!!!!

The second one I want to criticize is considered one of the most beautiful, most romantic songs in our language, and I too will sing it sometimes because the imagery gets to me, but once I fully analyzed the lyrics I could see that something unsavory and messed up is going on in here and I am going to talk about it.

Empress (youtube link) (1st verse) Golden threads of the summer dawn came to her castle to wake up my love. Light shall kiss her face, beautiful as in an empress, while I can't kiss her. Golden net of her body has captured my soul only to throw it back into the sea. Every morning, before dawn I come to her castle, white castle of my penance. (chorus) All of my life, all I wanted was her. To find the way to her heart. All of my life, my body is without her Like flowers without water.

These are all of the lyrics, and on the first glance, it sounds beautiful, he's describing her as royalty, and without any derogatory terms as well, which is not common, thus the romantic notion. But. If you paid attention, there are clues that tell us that this woman is not even remotely interested in him, and he's depicting himself as this deeply pained, suffering man, and he's suffering because of her appearance.

He's depicting an image of a woman who is hidden from him, by a castle, and he can't get close to her – this is probably because she is unwilling to face him, or to come close to him, she's behind a wall for a reason. He even implies he's jealous of the light kissing her face, which is in the area of insane obsessed stalker, and when you read further on, he mentions he actually comes to her castle, BEFORE DAWN, which means she probably doesn't know he's doing it, he is in fact, stalking this woman. He describes her castle as a white castle where his punishment happens – he is punished by what? Her existing?

The only description of this woman we get is the perceived beauty of her, there's never any insight in who she is, anything she does or says that would imply interest, but he feels deeply victimized. 'Golden net of her body has captured my sol', he imagines that her appearance was a trap to capture him, by which we can assume the poor woman never even said anything to him, he just saw her and decided that she is responsible for his feeling, because he likes appearance and feels he should have her. And here also we can see that she doesn't want him, because she 'threw his soul back into the sea', meaning she did not show any interest in him. He goes on to cry about how his body is 'like flowers without water', implying he is withering at the foot of her castle, because she is not showing any interest in sleeping with him, oh the horrors.

This is clearly a stalker song! She probably never even spoke to this man and he doesn't seem to know anything about her, he never ever mentions anything except for her beauty, we don't know what this woman is like, or what she wants, this is not a love song! The only agency this woman is showing is that she's staying hidden in her castle PROBABLY FOR A GOOD REASON, and he keeps stalking her and claiming she's causing him pain. I would freaking move castles.

The only saving grace of this song is that I do hope he withers completely without ever getting a glimpse of her, and that she never even finds out, which I feel is the correct way for him to go, without bothering her.

These are not the only songs I find issue with, I am actually continually mad about many other songs but I will leave it at this for now. Thank you for coming to my music corner where we point things out.

[moriartyluver]

FALSE LOVERS CHAPTER XXVII

"IVE ALWAYS WONDERED if this day would ever come. I'm sure that some of you have already heard of this.." Albert turned his head from the dark window to face the others, attempting to speak over the thunder outside "The situation has become extremely worrisome..this crisis is the first of its kind that the moriarty family has ever had to face."

Crack

Lightning had hit a tree outside, burning it to ashes dramatically. Rain poured down in typical British fashion, the windows foggy, covering the gloomy sky. 

"Let's work together in order to build strength." The brunette clenched his fist tightly, brows furrowed with determination as they all huddled together, hands upon hands. "we'll overcome this no matter what the cost..! Is everyone ready? All for one and One for All! Let's go!" 

The door creaked open mysteriously, pulling the attention of the men to the entrance. 

"Sorry we're late..what the hell..?!" Bonde had opened the door with (name) and Josephine stood behind him, bags in hands after they had just returned from a shopping trip 

"What on earth is going on?" (Name) asked, her eyebrow raised in suspicion. 

"Tea party...?" 

"That's right Bonde. As you know," Albert informed the trio who were stood in front of him "families hold tea parties on a rotational basis. Tea parties are often held in the day time, opposed to night parties. I've tried my best to hold it off but the other day, Earl Rockwell finally called me out.."

"It was about time," (Name) commented, sitting down with a sigh, legs folded over each other. "Frankly, I think we've been avoiding them for a while now." 

"I was reluctant, but I agreed to host the party at our manor this weekend." Albert added 

Josephine nodded "If the party is to be held on Sunday, we don't have much time to spare. We should get started on preparations as soon as possible, provided there aren't any obstacles in our way." 

"I have business to attend to on Sunday," (Name) said abruptly. 

"Care to elaborate?" Louis asked 

"I..erm.." she hesitated, looking for an excuse to not go to the tea party "I have a research project due in a few weeks for the university." 

"No you don't," William said, debunking her excuse. "I recall you saying you wished to spend Sunday reading-" 

There was a moments silence, all eyes on (Name) who suddenly found her shoes rather intriguing. She lifted her head with a groan "Fine, I don't want to host the tea party. Why on earth would I? All I'd do is have disturbing older men explain concepts of various natures which I am clearly more educated in, or worse, they'll flirt with me and treat me like they do a common harlot." 

"If she's not doing it then neither am I!" Moran exclaimed quickly. 

"(Name), you're attending the tea party just like the rest of us," Louis said sternly, turning to Moran. "We all are." 

"I don't want to," she folded her arms over her chest with a childish frown "You can't make me!" 

Albert sighed, glancing at William as if asking for help. He should've known having his brother marry a spoilt noblewoman wouldn't be easy, regardless of how in love with her he may have been. 

William nodded, scoring over to (Name) and leaning in to whisper into her ear as she listened attentively before sighing, speaking up reluctantly. 

"Fine, I'll do it." 

Albert blinked in surprise, curious as to what he said to make (Name) agree so easily. 

"Despite the whole fake marriage ordeal, many ladies still have been attempting to gain access to Will using various excuses." Albert spoke, continuing after the small issue.  "Such women will use the party as an excuse to approach him which means that you..!" He pointed to the (hair colour)-ette dramatically "Will have to keep them off, alright (name)?" 

"Roger that." She said, much more cooperative than before. 

William chuckled. "In that sense, you're also in danger Albert." 

"Of course I know how to deal with the ladies but when they gather in large groups..they gossip and become impossible to read.." all the men in the room shifted their eyes over to (name), who was still despairing over the thought of socialising against her will. 

"Huh...?" She murmured 

"You're the only one of us who'll be able to outsmart the ladies, (nickname), considering both the brat and moneypenny will be acting as maids." Sebastian said to the confused woman "So we'll need you to keep a close eye on them" 

"Shut your mouth," Josephine frowned in annoyance at Moran "I'm far more capable than you are..you'll probably just go drinking whilst the rest of us are working hard.." 

"Surely you wouldn't place such a grand burden upon only me," (name) said, returning to the point "you all know how difficult it is for me to socialise. I can't even read basic social cues half the time." 

"You'll be fine, (Name)." William placed a hand on hers reassuringly "We wouldn't choose you if we didn't think you were able." 

"The only reason you chose me for anything was because I'm handy with a knife." She said, revoking her hand "But if you insist, I suppose I could always try.." 

"Okay..let's go over our responsibilities one last time." Jack said, pulling out a small folded piece of paper from his breast pocket. He unfolded it, reading aloud from the list "As soon as young Al's toast is over, I will attend to the guests at the main venue."

"I mainly manage the party's progress" said Louis with a nod 

"And as head maid, Josephine and I will take charge of the maids to serve you." Moneypenny stated, adjusting her head piece. 

"I'll be in the garden, talking to a few of the guests while keeping a close eye on the more curious ladies." (Name) sighed. She wasn't a fan of tea parties. Ball room parties were usually much more entertaining, possibly because someone would usually somehow die during them but also because she was able to stand aside without any need to talk to anyone. Even at her own wedding, she refused to speak to any guests who weren't her family or close friends because she had gotten so fed up. 

"Our position is in the garden, William." Albert reminded the blond. 

William nodded, "Yes, brother. Let's monitor the situation and help each other in need." 

"I'm mainly here to protect you two." Spoke a butler-ified Moran. 

"I'll be in the rose garden and entertaining the guests there." Fred murmured, fidgeting with his gloves. 

"And I'm in charge of the guests in all areas of the manor." Bond grinned, too enthusiastically for (Name)'s liking. 

"That's right," Jack nodded "Bond is our so called 'Fighter', because a 'battle field' needs personnel who can respond quickly to unexpected situations." 

"Battle field..?" Fred repeated nervously. 

"It won't be that bad," Josephine reassured him, placing a hand on his shoulder "Believe me, I've had a lot worse with (Name)..once she got carried away and murdered a man in one of the Marquis (Last Name)'s villas during a party, but in my lady's defence, he had deeply offended her with his remarks." 

"what did he say?" asked Fred in a mousey voice

Josephine chuckled nervously "let's just say, you can't insult the female sex without provoking (Name)."

"By the way," James said, changing the topic promptly "What's Herder doing?" 

"Ah, he's already in position," Moran explained. Herder was stuck in the basement, doing puzzles whilst listening out for guests who might find the weaponry. 

The instructor glaced around "Everyone is ready." He confirmed "It's time..!"

Not even a second later, the street outside the manor's gates were filled with carriages, full of noblewomen, their giggles echoing as they stepped out of their carriages  

(Name) flinched upon hearing all the loud noises coming from the ladies leaving their carriages. She noticed there were a few males amongst them but not nearly enough as the noblewomen. A ratio of about 1:8, she had observed, and all her comrades would be counting on her to navigate this all in the appropriate manner.

"Now that we're all here.." Albert started his little toast once all the fawning ladies had surrounded him whilst the young noblmen who were waiting for the toast to be over so they could instantly made a bee-line to the poor overwhelemed (Name)  "It's thanks to Lord Rockwell that we were all able to welcome you here today. As you can see there are many shy people in our family," he side eyed his sister-in-law, resembling her deceased brother for a moment "even standing up here is making me a bit nervous. Please take this as an opportunity to look at our rose garden. It has been blooming very well." 

Albert picked up a glass of champagne carefully and raised it as he ended his toast

"Last but not least, there are refreshments laid out for everyone to enjoy. Please take as much time as you'd like to talk to us," He lifted his glass higher "Well then..cheers!" 

Within seconds of the toast ending, both William and Albert were surrounded by multiple noblewomen. Of course, (name) hadn't had it any easier and was soon approached by multiple noblemen who were exited to converse with her. During her time in University, multiple peers were interested in her but disliked the idea of getting closer to her in fear that she, a woman with an education, would go against their ideals for such a lady, or rather their stereotypes.

How abhorent! A woman with the ability to think for herself!

She had a mysterious charm to some. Usually she would be seen with a blank look on her face, whilst other times, she concealed her ture nature with a polite yet deceiving smile. Although she was 'married' in the eyes of the law, it wouldn't hurt anyone if they merely converse with such an elegant lady.

"I had looked forward to talking to all of you, but I can't talk to any of you if you all are speaking at once.." Albert said, snapping (Name) out of her thoughts. "and I don't think a tea party is supposed to be like this. I was hoping we'd be more elegant and austere..." He trailed off, gently grabbing a lady, who stood beside him, by her chin, guding her gaze to his emerald eyes.

The noblewomen and noblemen had caught onto what Albert had meant and slowly dispersed, allowing others to take their time. Some had headed for the greenhouse, full of flowers that had been cultivated by none other than Fred, whilst others stuck around with the two brothers, batting their eyes and attempting to gain their attention. 

(Name) could only furrow a brow and sigh as she watched, quickly distracted by a young man whwo haad caught her attention with a question once it had all died down, far more unique than the ususal questions about her life in England, even if she had been living there for 8 years, or older men attempting to make her feel like an idiot. 

"My apologies if I am out of line, but what are your opinions on the recent Jack the Ripper case," a man with dark hair hair asked her. He seemed around her age, maybe a little younger, and had a polite smile which made his eyes crinkle slightly in the corners "You seem so knowledge on all subjects of conversation, not just superficial ones like most men may assume.." 

"Well, I as a sophisticated lady of polite society, could never be exposed to such tragedies, I have no knowledge of such a case," She jested, a smile on her lips "Although, I'd say the Yard are trying to cover it up with their recent list of suspects, surely nobody would believe that.." she said under her breath

"Yes, well," He took a glass of wine from a servant, swirling the drink in his glass, "I have a theory that the entire thing was a hoax to promote that Conan Doyle's next story."

"You read the Sherlock Holmes series?" (Name) laughed at his theory"That's interesting, I've actually made his aquaintance, we met on the Noahtic.. and a train to London, both times a murder had occured. He just seems to be riddled with bad luck, it must be something to do with his hair." 

"Is that why he covers it up with that dreadful cap?" the man asked with an amused tone 

(Name) shrugged her shoulders as she bit into a small cake, "Personally, I think he looks better in darker tones, and that cloak does him no justice whatsoever." She paused, realising she was actually having fun "I don't believe we've been formally introduced, dear stranger. Perhaps you could change that?" 

He took her left hand, kissing her knuckles over the silk glove she wore. "Lord Oliver Hastings, first grandson of the Duke of Hastings it's a pleasure to make your aquaintance, Lady Moriarty."

"I really shouldn't be surprised you already are familiar with my name," She smiled, a genuine smile at that 

"Well why wouldn't I? You are rather famous amongst the ton, after all, although, I first saw your name in a research paper you had published in your Almer Mater, Oxford ring any bells?" Oliver reciprocated the smile 

"I'm surprised anyone would read that, I was half asleep whilst I wrote it. Do you still study there?" She asked, her eyes drifting over to William, who stood in front of a group of ladies 

Oliver shook his head with a laugh "God no, do i really seem that naive? I graduated last year, personally, I was more fond of subjects which frequire critical thought rather than just making up numbers to solve, so I studied Literature and Philosophy mostly, but I made an exception for what you had to say in that little thesis of yours, and I must say, I've been dying to talk to you since." 

"Well consider yourself saved from such a tragic fate." She chuckled, glancing again at William who seemed to be struggling with a flirtatious young, no scrath that, she was definitley considered a spinster, woman. 

"Is something bothering you? You keep looking over there." 

"Oh no, I'm fine. It's my husband I'm worried about." She turned back to face him, her (eye colour) eyes on his blue ones "He's even more socially inept than I am." 

"And that's why you're seen so frequently in polite society?" He asked 

She frowned in faux annoyance "Doesn't mean I enjoy it." He laughed once more in response whilst (Name) sighed looking back at William, the damsel in distress needed saving "I'm sorry, I'm going to have to cut the conversation short...I don't think I'm a fan of bigamy." She half joked  before walking away, seeing the look of relief on William's face as he noticed her presence.

"What's this, darling?" A sweet voice, almost unrecognisable, called out to poor William, still embarrassed after that 'subtle' confession. If he had taken any more steps further back, he would have tripped and broken his skull in half. 

"(N-Name)." William, face somewhat flushed, managed to utter. 

He didn't often stutter, rather his speech was always elegant and sophisticated, the 'confidence' he exuded was never not noticeable in his speech and yet, that voice...that siren like voice had The Lord of Crime trembling and nervous. William could feel his heart speeding up, eventually pounding in his chest even though his wife was a good few feet away from him, but of course even the mere mention of Lady (Name) could make his brain numb with overwhelming thoughts. 

(Name) walked through the other noble ladies, admittedly rather jealous now that she had finally come to terms with these feelings she had. She gave a polite smile, whispering a few 'pardon me's and 'good afternoon's 

"Now that I recall," She said, pushing past the woman who had attempted to make advances on William "We really bonded over one particular consultation, didn't we?" 

"We did indeed.." William said, still flustered. His cheeks grew a deeper shade of red as (name) cling to his arm, her frame pressed against his as her fingers caressed his bicep. 

"I really am lucky to have such an intelligent, and not to mention handsome husband," (Name) complimented, using her palm to cup his chin and bring him to face her. She turned to the other ladies, flashing a glare at the woman who seemed to have made her husband uncomfortable and then returned back to her lovey dovey expression, smile from ear to ear. 

"My apologies ladies but it appears you must seek consultation another time. I have something my dearest William and I need to discuss in private." She said with a wink, dragging a stunned William towards the nearest entrance to the manor.

Once they had entered, climbing upstairs, away from the guests, (name) dropped his hand promptly with a groan. 

"A 'thank you' would be nice." (Name) said as they walked down the quiet halls. "I had to practically fight off all the men, no thanks to you involving me in this boring tea party..although I must say, I expected a lot less gentlemen within our age range, I typically would attract the older, perverted sort, rather than the nice ones we had this afternoon." 

William clenched his jaw, fighting back his jealous feelings "You found them attractive?" He managed to say. 

"Well, there were a few handsome ones, I suppose." She put a finger to her chin, lips pressed together in thought. 

Was she aware of the effect that she had on him? William was always so rational and calm and he hadn't ever felt so envious of anyone, not in his entire life. Of course he could be occasionally jealous when he was but a child, often looking towards those more fortunate and wondering 'why not me?'  

The last time he had felt like this was when (Name)'s first lover wasn't 6 feet underground and torn to pieces, whenever he would see her smiling with the older boy or laughing at some very clearly not amusing joke (he often thought he was much more entertaining than that dull man, his personality was like that of a lemon which had been squeezed dry). Once he had even seen him kiss her, not very skilfully and much too rough for someone like (Name), he would be so much better for her.

It was in between some shelves in the library when he was trying to find a book on probabilities of all things. He had to resist the urge to throw it right in his hideous face, at the very least (or murder him but (Name) beat him to something for once). William actually remembered asking himself what the probability that she would rid herself of that fool and turn her attention to him. 

"Actually there was one particular man, dark hair, rather beautiful, very funny...what was his name again..? Oh yes, Oliver..." She was almost giggling like a teenager, hands clasped behind her back in an innocent manner. The description seemed rather familiar. Was she really attracted to 'amusing' dark haired men? 

God, she was aggravating. 

But so beautiful too, and witty of course. And her eyes were so captivating, so enthralling. William had known this since forever. Nobody knew it more than him.He'd often gaze into her eyes, especially if she was enthusiastic or explaining a mathematical concept to him. 

"Is that so?" He choked out, eyes lingering on her as she brushed her gloved hand against the textured wallpaper. 

She hummed with a nod "I was convinced he fancied me, but of course, you being you, you had women practically throwing themselves at you and I had to come to your rescue." 

"Women do not throw themselves at me." He stated curtly. 

"Oh yes they do, professor." (Name) teased "You aren't exactly an eyesore, are you? A nice physique, a pretty face, and a tolerable personality. You're considered desirable amongst the women of the upper class." 

But was he desirable to her? 

He had to take a deep breath. She was doing this on purpose, she had to be. She must have caught onto his attraction for her and now he was being tormented by a higher power for his desperations. 

"More so than this Oliver?" He blurted out. He had meant to say something completely different, but it was as if his brain was no longer thinking for him, rather his heart was. 

Had Freud been well established in 1879, one may call such a mistake a 'Freudian Slip', but of course, he wasn't. He had to wait till the 1900s for that. For now, though, dear reader, we could call this a "Liam-being-a-desperate-man-whore-slip." 

(Name) had to fight back the smirk on her lips, wrestling with her desire to laugh at him for now feeling the same way he had made her felt, although William wasn't flirting with anyone in an attempt to make (Name) jealous, he was just existing and trying to give advice to women who couldn't help but adore him. 

She leaned against the wall, inches away from her bedroom door. "Is someone jealous?" She asked, voice sickeningly sweet. William could never truly hate her, well he did at one point, but it wasn't hate so much as it was irritation at her antics, yet she was only a child, a mere teenager. He couldn't blame her. But God, the way she smirked up at him made him want to wipe that expression off her face, it was so unlike him. 

"Jealous?" He repeated slowly, processing and analysing his own feelings. He had long known how he felt for (Name), that was certain, but he hadn't expected it to become more than simply admiring from afar..and yet here they were. 

"The mere mention of another man seems to be making your blood boil.." she said smugly, eyes shining in the sunlight "I never knew your affections for me were so grand." 

"It's not that," William spoke, trying to articulate his speech when all he truly wanted was to press his lips against hers, his voice slowly raising as he grew more tense. "It's improper in polite society for a married woman to act flirtatiously with other men." 

"I didn't take you as one for polite society, William." She retorted, fingers ghosting over his shoulder "I thought that was something you aimed to destroy, sweetheart."

"You know what I mean." He said, red eyes piercing through her (eye colour) eyes. "What would everyone think knowing you've had extra marital affairs?" 

"Now this really isn't like you," (Name) laughed, hand slowly drifting down to his arm "I thought none of that bothered you? We don't exactly have any commitments to one another-" 

"It was implied." He cut her off, almost aggressively. How dare she bring up the initial regulations for this contract marriage when she knew the lines were blurred so heavily at the point, ever since they had slept together, no, ever since they had even kissed! His palms rested against the wall, just short of (Name)'s ears while she tried to stand straight, unwilling to allow him the upper hand. "During our past two years of marriage, you haven't expressed any interest in any men, and there is no need to change that now."  

There was a short silence. The only thing (Name) could hear was her own rapid heart beat and the sound of William's soft breathing as he lowered his face away from her gaze. The position she was in was truly unfortunate, but not exactly unwelcome. He had both arms caged around her while she leaned against the wall, her knees feeling slightly weak as they bent slightly, making her feel much smaller than she was. She had retracted her hand from him, holding to wall to keep herself steady as she attempted to anticipate his next move. It was like chess, except with just the king and queen. Actually, maybe it wasn't that similar. 

"And it does bother me," William eventually spoke, voice ragged and breathless "Ceaselessly. I hated seeing you with that womaniser. And when I had finally thought he was gone and you would turn your attention elsewhere, more only followed..but once we had both left university, I had to witness you sneaking off at balls, usually with that Lord Henry and-" 

"So you did know who Theodore was?" She asked, irritated by his confession "And you felt the need to pretend you didn't, as if you weren't spying on me the whole time! God you are insufferable!" 

"Not nearly as insufferable as you are!" He glared down at her. 

"You know that they didn't mean anything to me, I don't see why this is even a point of discussion," (Name) defended herself, leaning her head against the wall "Why should I be held responsible?" 

William unconsciously clenched his teeth, eyebrows furrowed together. "Must I make it any clearer to you? Are you really that foolish, that naive?" 

"Perhaps I am, I'm just a stupid whore to you, aren't I?" She spat, a raised eyebrow as she waited for him to speak. "But I think I know jealousy when I see it." 

"It's not that I'm jealous, it's just that.." he almost stammered before snapping, much to (Name)'s surprise.  "You're mine, (Name). My wife, not Oliver's, not Lord Henry's, and certainly not Theodore Arden's." 

Since when was he so possessive..? And why was it undeniably attractive? 

His words hung heavy in the air, realisations to his rudeness hitting him suddenly. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say that.." he apologised, pulling away in embarrassment, averting his gaze.  "I shouldn't have.."

(Name)'s fingers looped through his belt, grasping onto his arm as she  pulled him back in for a fiery kiss. He was quick to return the gesture, his hands making theirway to her back and pulling her closer, seeking more of her. 

"You're so irritating.." She murmured against his lips "I despise you with every breath."

He chuckled bitterly at her words, his lips parting and coliding with hers "And you aren't? Nobody has been on my mind more than you..you're a distraction, an obstacle. I can't believe I was foolish enough to marry you." 

"Believe me, it hasn't been easy for me either," (Name) groaned against his lips, pulling his hair. "Can't you do anything right? Kiss me properly...I hadn't waited that long just for you to learn nothing from our previous encounter, or maybe you've forgotten." 

"I promise, (Name), I haven't..I think about it constantly, to the point it haunts my dreams." He moaned as she bit his lip, twisting the doorknob to her bedroom and opening the door with a creek "But if I didn't, I'd trust you to help me recall." 

She cupped his cheeks in her palms, walking into the room with him as he shut the door behind them, allowing them some privacy. "So I'm better than you at something for once, and you have no feelings of hatred? How underwhelming."

"I hate you." He said as he pressed her against her bedroom wall, the wallpaper contrasting beautifully with her skin. "I hate you so passionately I don't know what to do with myself half the time. I wish I could say I regret meeting you but then I wouldn't be here with you.." 

"Mm.." (Name) hummed, her hand making its way to his hair again, her fingers tangling in those blond locks she adored "I hate you more..if you hadn't bribed me to attend this party, we wouldn't be doing this right now." 

"Then thank God I did," he smirked against her lips, breathless from kissing her so long with barely enough room to breathe. His mind was hazy now, and he was just going to exert himself even further, but he didn't mind. Anything for (Name).

"Yo Patterson," Moran called out to the man in glasses "You- this was a difficult win.." 

"I understand..it seems everyone had a hard time today," He pushed up his spectacles with his pinky

"What about everyone else? And the old man?" 

"Albert and the old man already went to their rooms...William and (Name) left early, and I haven't seen them since, but they're around...and moneypenny's gone home." Moran explained

"Really? I brought some alcohol." Patterson smiled, holding up the bottle 

"Sorry," The colonel smirked 

"It seems Bond is already asleep..and I've come all this way..at least you can join me for a drink, Moran."  Patterson said through the snores of Bond, Fred and Josephine who were curled up on the couch together. 

"By the way Moran," He continued, gazing out of the window "I hope you didn't put your hands on any of the ladies during the tea party." 

"I didn't have time for that! None of us did, we were all doing our jobs." He protested, already starting to get tipsy. 

"Hm? I thought you said William and (Name).." the detective paused, shrugging his shoulders "I see you've finely seen the joy of hard work." 

"You don't think they..?" 

"You never know."

A/N: first false lovers chapter in months lol. The wait was worth it I promise. We’re getting closer to the final problem arc tho and that’s depressing ☹️ Anyways, I have finals soon but during the summer, I’ll be posting a lot more, I promiseee. Let me know if I guys liked this chapter because I made a few slight changes from my normal style soo. Okay bye byeee ‼️

[docholligay]

Every now and then when I watch a kid show, I'll see something that makes me think "Oh, this is a surprisingly kid-friendly way to discuss this topic! Maybe I should see if Doc wants to show this to Midge to open up a conversation about that."

But then I think "If Doc wanted to have that conversation with Midge, she would simply Do So."

You can answer privately if you want (don't wanna make you open up the Children Show floodgates) but would recs like that be welcome? Not for a liveblog or anything, for your usual reasons, but just something to keep on the back burner for subjects like that. (In the example I'm thinking of, it's a child-friendly way to talk about depression and suicide, ITS NOT THE BLUE DOG SHOW I PROMISE)

ahahahah your second paragraph, as I was reading the paragraph I was like, "I bring a real 'addressing the problem directly' vibe the internet doesn't like"

This isn't to say I don't think there aren't incredible ways that fiction can facilitate a conversation, but I am a Direct Individual a solid, oh, 90% of the time? There's still that 10% where I think it might come off meaner than I mean to be if I address it, so I decide to take a 'wait and see' approach, but that's not a 'tough topic' that's usually about a boundary getting close or some shit.

Alongside with that, when it comes to "Something that frames something for my daughter" it's very much I, 'Well, I absolutely need to watch it first, because there is an outside chance it frames the issue in a way I don't agree with and don't intend to teach her" and while I think a plurality of viewpoints is honestly the best way to look at the world, I do of course have my general morals and ideals that I'd like her to have to the best of my ability. Being as I am perfect with every right opinion and all, DocDoc the Blameless.

WOW A LOT OF WORDS TO SAY: If I want something like that, I'll probably ask for that directly! We're into books right now more than we are extended visual narratives, part of which is because I have not encouraged watching screens, so she's not used to it. She's watched like, Moana, twice. (And we all know Moana is very very special)

But yeah I will not show her Bluey, because "Parents will drop everything to make intricate games with you" is not a value *I* am going to set forth in my house, and I am STILL so annoyed with my wife for showing her Peppa because Peppa's a fucking spoilt brat, I don't need something else. Also adults cannot be fucking normal about Bluey.

[kpopsexstories]

Kissing Booth Ep. 5 – Homesick and crying during their trainee days, Jisung crawls naked into Chenle's bed.

‘Kissing Booth’ is a fictional podcast hosted by boyfriends Chenle and Jisung. In it they discuss love, sex and relationships. This Kissing Booth Tumblr series is excerpts from the couple's most sexual conversations on the show.

EPISODE 5: HOMESICK

Jisung: We got a question from a listener.

Chenle: Oh I love those!

Jisung: “Hi Kissing Booth. A couple of episodes ago you mentioned how Chenle used to sneak into Jisung's dorm room when you were trainees. I think I speak for anyone when I ask, can you please tell us more about that? Or would SM end your show if you did?”

Chenle: Hah! I think it's crazy that they haven't ended it already.

Jisung: Yeah… I can't believe they're still letting us do this. But I guess we'll share and see what happens.

Chenle: Whoever sent that question, if the show ends it's your fault.

Jisung: That's unfair, this isn't the worst story we've ever told.

Chenle: You have a specific time in mind?

Jisung: No, I mean in general. During those days we didn't really do anything that bad, did we? I mean, we never had sex before we started dating, and that was years later.

Chenle: True. I do remember a specific time though. And that time it wasn't me sneaking into your bed. You remember you went through a pretty rough time for a while?

Jisung: I try to forget. I haven't thought about that time in my life for a while. I'm happy now. We're happy.

Chenle: Yeah, but I still feel bad about how you felt back then. Actually, we were just talking about this the other day.

Jisung: I was young, away from home, scared. I wasn't lonely but I got homesick really easily back then.

Chenle: You still do. But now you are home, that's the difference. When we were trainees it didn't feel like home yet. It felt like we were away at camp or something.

Jisung: How would you know what camp feels like? You grew up rich and spoilt!

Chenle: Our trainee days was my camp experience.

Jisung: Your mom moved with you though. Your family bought a house in Korea just to be with you! You can't compare that to regular kids going to some summer camp or something.

Chenle: Maybe not, but I feel like I can relate.

Jisung: I'm sure you can't. But whatever. I think I know what time you're getting at now…

Chenle: We had a long weekend off. The others went away to see their own families. Mark and Haechan were still around because they had 127 practice, but none of the other dreamies were in the dorm.

Jisung: Yeah, and you had your mom living with you in the city.

Chenle: But that weekend I stayed in the dorm. You were homesick, I didn't want you to be alone.

Jisung: We were alone in the dorm. You were on your phone. I was trying to sleep.

Chenle: But you couldn't?

Jisung: No, I was actually feeling kind of sad.

Chenle: Yes, this is the time I was thinking of. You were super sad. I think you'd been crying.

Jisung: I… Yeah, not gonna lie, I had been crying.

Chenle: I'm so sorry I didn't realize at the time.

Jisung: Don't worry. You were already there for me just by being in the room.

Chenle: Though clearly that wasn't enough… Wanna tell our listeners what happened?

Jisung: You tell it.

Chenle: *smirks* I'd love to!

Jisung: Wow, stop right there, don't make me look bad okay?

Chenle: What? How could I? You're the sweetest in this story! I think this was the day I fell in love with you.

Jisung: Pfft! That's not true. But whatever, go on, what happened?

Chenle: So, I was on my phone in bed, …

Jisung: Wearing nothing but your underwear and a t-shirt I might add.

Chenle: Are you telling this or am I?

Jisung: …

Chenle: So, Jisung, the cutie I love so much, had just tried to cry himself to sleep and I hadn't even noticed.

Jisung: Mm-hmm.

Chenle: Shut up.

Jisung: Sorry, go on.

Chenle: He was feeling down, and he suddenly got out of bed. I clearly remember because unlike me he wasn't wearing a t-shirt. Just his underwear.

Jisung: You couldn't keep your eyes off me!

Chenle: Oh my god, will you let me tell the story?

Jisung: Sorry babe.

Chenle: So yeah, he got out of bed half naked and walked toward me. I put down my phone and looked at him – and yes, before you interrupt me, I was totally checking you out!

Jisung: So fucking horny before I even got there.

Chenle: Well, it wasn't the first time we shared a bed. I knew what you came over for. Anyway, you crawled into bed with me.

Jisung: We lay close together. You were actually still on your phone at the time. I felt like you were ignoring me at first.

Chenle: I wasn't ignoring you babe. I was just scared. We were so young a d inexperienced. Besides, did you want comfort or sex? I wasn't completely sure.

Jisung: We hadn't had sex at the time though.

Chenle: No, but you already knew I desperately wanted to. I was so turned on by you.

Jisung: Yeah, and when I got in your bed that time you were already horny.

Chenle: Of course I was! I'd just seen your sexy body walk toward me.

Jisung: You thought I was sexy back then? I was so scrawny.

Chenle: Ehm, you've always been the sexiest person I've ever seen. I was so turned on by you! You think I was just on my phone, in my own world, but in reality I was thinking about you the whole time, long before you got out of bed. If you hadn't come to me I would probably have come to you.

Jisung: Hey you didn't put the phone down when I came.

Chenle: No. I was too nervous. I wanted to pretend to be cool and casual.

Jisung: You failed. In that moment I thought you were cold and distant.

Chenle: Whatever dude.

Jisung: But you saved the day. To be fair you did put the phone down once I touched you.

Chenle: I'm glad we agree that you're the one who came on to me first. I thought you'd argue with me on that.

Jisung: No, I was definitely the one to come on to you that day, I can't deny that.

Chenle: And I'm so glad you did. We were so young and naive.

Jisung: Yeah but it also wasn't our first time being intimate. I knew what I wanted and I think you did too.

Chenle: I did. So, you crawled into my bed all naked and horny, and I immediately became horny too. But I could tell you'd been crying. So I held you, and my heart really felt bad for you.

Jisung: I remember that moment so clearly too. Maybe that's the moment when I fell in love with you too.

Chenle: Oh please, you were in love with me from the first time we met!

Jisung: Well, I was always into you. But I wouldn't say it was love.

Chenle: It was love. You loved me.

Jisung: Fine, I've always loved you babe, despite how rich and spoilt and selfish you were back then.

Chenle: That's unfair!

Jisung: I'm only joking babe. When you held me that day, I really did feel loved.

Chenle: And then… this is the part I love and why I brought up this story… you started crying.

Jisung: Yeah, I did. I hate to admit that.

Chenle: Don't worry. It was a really important moment to me. You burried your head in my shoulder and started bawling your eyes out. It was the most heartbreaking, sweetest moment I have ever experienced. You came to me in your time of need, and that meant so much to me.

Jisung: You were the only one around, I'd choose anyone else if I could…

Chenle: Fuck you! I'm supposed to be the selfish one who puts you down, remember?

Jisung: *laughs* I might call you a rich snob all the time, but you're really not. I know that you know that I don't really think that of you.

Chenle: I know. I love you babe.

Jisung: I love you too. But hey, the question was a bit vague. I'm sure a sob story is not what our listeners want. They want to know what happened during our trainee days sexually. Should we get to that point already?

Chenle: Yeah yeah, I'm getting there. So Jisung is in my bed, in only his underwear, bawling his eyes out. And we're both horny as fuck. We've jerked each other off before at this point, but this time felt different.

Jisung: You always knew how to make me feel better.

Chenle: Yeah. You wanna tell them? How did I do it this time?

Jisung: Well, as we were laying there, you touched me. I still remember your hand on my stomach. But then you went down…

Chenle: Yeah, and you were so fucking horny.

Jisung: So were you! Again, don't try to pin it on me.

Chenle: You're right, I'm the one who stuck my hand in. I knew you wanted me to take care of you.

Jisung: I wanted you to fuck me like I was your boyfriend.

Chenle: But we weren't at that time.

Jisung: No, we weren't. And what you did was almost as good. Maybe better. I just needed a friend.

Chenle: You were my friend.

Jisung: And I'm thankful for that. You know, I think that night might have been when I fell in love with you.

Chenle: Oh please, you were just horny. So hard. When I touched you, you kissed me. And we made out.

Jisung: Exactly. I wanted you so bad, but not just sexually. Then you started to feel me up and sat up and took off your shirt!

Chenle: Yes, and you took off your underwear, so…

Jisung: So did you though. We both got naked so fast.

Chenle: For like the millionth time. I really miss that time, the trainee days, when getting naked together was forbidden. It felt so thrilling.

Jisung: It wasn't the millionth time. It wasn't the first either, but we were usually never alone together. The reason this time was so special was not just because I was so sad, but because we actually had the whole dorm to ourselves. Mark and Haechan didn't sleep there that night.

Chenle: Yeah, where the hell were they?

Jisung: That had 127 practice. Or something. I'm actually not sure, I think maybe they slept in the 127 dorm? It feels so long ago, it's all a fuss.

Chenle: I guess. The point is, you and I were young, maybe in love though we hadn't realized it at the time, naked in bed together, horny as fuck, and your eyes were red from all the crying. I wanted you so desperately and you just needed a realease to take your mind off things.

Jisung: And that's exactly what you gave me. I forget how mature you are nowadays. In this story I'm the weak one and you're the hero. It's usually the other way around.

Chenle: Whatever dude.

Jisung: Ahh, but I do remember us together that night so clearly. We found each other's dicks. We jerked each other off. You came first. Then you made me come so hard. Maybe it was the sadness and the feeling of you caring for me and loving me at least as a friend, but you made me bust so hard. And we had the place to ourselves, so this was the first time I can remember that I actually felt unrestricted. I remember I was on my back looking at the ceiling when you made me orgasm.

Chenle: I don't think I've told you this, but this was actually the first time I saw someone else's cum.

Jisung: What?

Chenle: It's true. That's the reason I brought this story up. It was the first time I saw another man… unload.

Jisung: But… we made each other come many times before this day…

Chenle: Yeah, but always in secret, always hidden under a blanket or something.

Jisung: I've never thought about that. I'm pretty sure I saw yours before.

Chenle: Well, I'm sure I hadn't. I'm serious. You were sad and all and that's important to this story, that's why it was so memorable, but I will never forget the day precisely because I had never seen someone else come before.

Jisung: Huh. That's interesting. I always knew you never made Lea come…

Chenle: Shut up! I was talking about sperm! Girls don't count.

Jisung: You've never seen a girl orgasm.

Chenle: I have!

Jisung: Porn doesn't count.

Chenle: Whatever dude.

Jisung: Anyway, the point is you made me feel good that day. I wasn't as sad after that moment. And, we fell in love with each other.

Chenle: We did. Yet we didn't date during that time.

Jisung: No… That happened years later.

Chenle: So did we answer the question?

Jisung: I don't even remember what the question was.

Chenle: You brought it up! “Can you tell us more about how you used to sneak into each other's rooms?”

Jisung: Oh, right! We never actually snuck into each other's rooms. We already shared a room. We snuck into each other's beds.

Chenle: And by the time we got our own rooms we didn't need to sneak.

Jisung: No, by then we were already dating. It sometimes amazes me how far we've come.

Chenle: We're role models for an openly gay Korea.

Jisung: Yeah, I guess.

Chenle: By the way, how come you didn't go home like the others that day?

Jisung: My family were all out of town. I think I've convinced myself that what happened was that the weekend off wasn't planned. We weren't expecting to be off. But I don't think that's true. We knew about it in advance, I just didn't communicate well and took my family for granted. When the time came, they weren't available and had good reasons for it. I told them not to worry, and didn't want to bother them.

Chenle: That's why I love you so much. You always care so much about the people around you. I'm just a selfish jerk.

Jisung: No you're not. You're such a sweetie.

Chenle: I'm your sweetie.

Jisung: Yes, you are. Though the way you just sad that maybe proves that you're not. You are the selfish one. You only let me crawl into your bed because you were horny.

Chenle: Well fuck you!

Jisung: *smirks* Anytime babe. Anytime.

[moni-logues]

The ~engagement 'issue'~

I feel like I'm seeing more and more posts about readers' lack of engagement with writers on here and I now want to say something. I don't say things short so buckle in lmao

TL;DR: idgaf if you, readers, comment on my shit or not. I care that you enjoy it and, if you did, job complete, mission accomplished, well done. I want to be part of a community, not a service provider/'content creator'. I write because I want to and getting to hear people's thoughts and feedback is just a huge fucking bonus to that. Also, readers I love you.

I love my readers. All of them, loud and silent alike. Readers who comment with long reviews, pulling out quotes or bits they liked, reacting with predictions or responding to the characters. Readers who just comment that they really liked it! that it was good! Readers who like. Readers who read and leave no mark at all. Readers who follow me and readers who come across something I wrote another way, who didn't follow me before and don't after. I am deeply grateful that anyone takes the time to read the things I write, whether you've read everything I've ever posted or just one drabble.

I know that all writers are similarly grateful to have this space and to have people here who read their work. I do, to a certain extent, understand the frustration with regards to like:comment ratios.

However.

I know that reviews take effort. I am a chronically unenthusiastic person and it takes a lot for me to summon the energy to respond how I feel I should, in a way that I think would make the writer happy, in a way that I feel is befitting how I actually feel about the fic I read. There are other reasons I have been reading less recently but one of the reasons is that I feel pressure to review every single thing I read. So I just don't read!!! Isn't that stupid???? Sure, I'm putting imaginary presure on myself by thinking I need to respond in a particular way and that is very much my problem (and I'm trying hard to address it and read/review more anyway), but I feel like readers are taking a bit of a bashing right now and I don't ever want readers to stop reading or to have the reading experience spoilt by feeling a pressure to respond.

I write because I enjoy it. When I first started writing, I had no followers. It took me months to get 100 followers. It took almost a year to get to 1k and then I started over with a brand new blog. I wrote all 60k of A Fine Line by myself, with absolutely no one else reading it because I wanted to. I love getting comments from readers; I love hearing people's thoughts about the shit I write; I love this little community here... But that's what it is: community. This is not transactional! or at least, I don't want it to be! I am not writing fics as a service for which I am paid in reblogs. I am being a fan of BTS with other fans of BTS and we are making up little stories and imagining scenarios and having all kinds of fun with each other, whether you write or gif or edit or just consume. We're in this together!

I saw once, I don't remember where or when, a thing that said, if you are feeling miserable, do something nice for someone else and it will lift your mood. This is, in my experience, absolutely correct. Writers, if you are feeling miserable about your engagment, engage with others the way you want people to with you, write a review for someone else's fic that would make your day if you received it. We writers are all readers, too, and we are not exempt from these ~criticisms~ just because we write.

I am not trying to ~call anyone out~ or, in turn, criticise writers. I'm not. I understand. I do. But every time I see one of these posts, it upsets me, because if I were an active, engaged reader, it would make me feel bad. If I were a silent reader, it would make me feel bad. I don't ever want to make anyone feel bad for enjoying something. Readers don't owe us anything! If this issue is ruining the writing experience for you, it is on you to examine that; it is not the fault of your readers. If it means that you no longer enjoy writing, stop writing. Our time on earth is short and precious! Let's spend it, as much as we can, doing things we enjoy! Not doing things that make us miserable!

Fin.

[tinkabelle24]

To Build a Home

Chapter 26: If You Love Her...

A/N: This chapter was gonna be longer, but I'm neck-deep in assignments right now for the very last unit of my degree and really wanted to get this out. Because I doubt I'll be able to update after this for quite a while. I'm about to get myself a big girl job 😁😅

This chapter took inspiration from scenes of a few of my favourite films/TV shows; one from Spider-Man 2, one from S4 of The Vampire Diaries, one from The Corpse Bride and, strangely, I found myself regularly referring to another from Until Dawn.

TW! No trigger warnings.

Masterlist | Chapter 25

--------------------------------

[I'm not reading this shit. Be a man and pick up the fckn phone]

.

.

.

Leo sat in the van, staring at his brother's text for what felt like hours, struggling to psych himself up enough to oblige. He'd anticipated this - no matter how sincere his written apology may be, Raph would never accept anything less than an in-person one.

Of course, Leo suspected at least part of that reason was so he'd be close enough to strangle...

Still, after everything, Raph deserved something.

With a tremulous breath, Leo finally pressed 'call', putting the shell-cell on speaker before bringing it to his lips.

The second ring barely sounded when the receiving line picked up. The leader braced himself for a barrage of insults and death threats, but none came. Only breathing...

After several long moments of this, Leo finally opened his mouth to speak-

"Why...?" Came Raph's quiet, gravelly voice, striking guilt through the eldest brother's heart – he’d been crying.

Leo failed to answer initially, unsure whether to request clarification – for fear of upsetting Raph further – or just assume the specific situation his brother was referring to. To his relief, he didn't end up having to do either.

"Why'd you do this to me...? How could'ya think this little of me, that I-I'd... I've nevah and will nevah... or-or was villifyin' me the only way you could justify to y'self the shit you've put us through...? What the hell was your endgame, Leo? Huh?? Were'ya seriously hopin' she'd leave me for you?? How fuckin' little do'ya think of her-?!"

Leo winced at that. "R-Raph-"

"Y'know," Raph sniffled. "I'd planned on askin' Val to be my forever-"

A shuddered gasp forced its way past the leader's lips as he buried his face in his hand, the weight of those words settling over him, like a lead blanket...

"I had a ring made and everythin’; got it forged outta my old Sai... This weekend – tonight, actually – I was finally gonna give it to her... But'chu couldn't help y'self, could you? You just had to stick your nose where it didn't belong... and now, because of you, dear brothah... it seems I'll be losin’... e-everything-"

No...

"Y-you broke-"

"We're on a break," Raph corrected, venom dripping from his tongue. "And if you value your life, I suggest you stay right where you are; cuddled up with daddy, like the little bitch you are. Cos, believe it or not, Val's angrier with you right now than I am."

Before Leo could respond, he was met with a deafening silence...

On the other end, Mikey levelled Donnie a resolute look as they discreetly listened in on their eldest brothers' conversation – followed promptly by the shattering of glass and plastic against the brickwork, then quiet, mournful sobbing – beyond Raph's locked bedroom door.

"C'mon," Mikey finally muttered as he proceeded up the hallway, beckoning a puzzled Donnie to follow.

"What??" The purple-banded terrapin hissed, too near to the door to want to risk producing much sound. "Mikey...!"

His littlest brother was already halfway down the staircase, shell-cell to his ear. "We're getting our sister back."

---

Leo was spoilt for choice that day – the wildflowers at the forest edge were in full bloom.

After gathering a small posy, the leader trudged back to the great oak where he laid them upon Splinter's grave mound; carefully wiping then rinsing away the dirt and moss from the marker, then finally settling onto his knees in prayer.

"Hey, dad..." He murmured, maintaining the submissive gaze as he soothingly rubbed his thighs. "It's been a while since we've visited - I'm sorry about that... and for not having any good news to share, heh... It's been, w-well-"

Shoulders sagging, he gave a quavering sigh; hot tears pricking his eyes.

"I... T-that woman who came to see you, the last time we were here - her name's Valerie. She's wonderful, dad. She's... she's helped make life a-after you good again. It saddens me that you two never met in this life..."

A tear began creeping down his cheek – he swiped it away with a sniffle.

"I've done something hideous, Master, and I don't know how to fix it... You see, u-um... I've... I've fallen in love with this woman-"

A scoff escaped Leo as he shoved off his now damp bandana, banishing another tear in the process. He'd hoped that by finally admitting it, aloud and uninterrupted, his heavy heart would unburden him, if only just a little...

…It made it infinitely worse.

"But she's with Raph... I tried not to let these feelings get in the way of their relationship, or our friendship, or our family, b-but..."

Raph's question harried Leo's mind; a question he never thought to ask himself until Val – having finally been pushed by him to her limit – spurned him...

As badly as he wanted his intentions to be wholly righteous – protecting a victim, the woman he loved, from her abuser – he knew that simply wasn't the case. Not only was he devastatingly off-base, but a hypocrite to boot.

He knew what his endgame was, and it repulsed him...

"I'll never understand why you never told us what was going on..." The tears were flowing now; Leo no longer had the strength to belay them. "If only I'd just... We weren't ready – I wasn't ready. I've no clue who I am without you... I n-need you, dad... I need this pain-"

He thumped his plastron, where his heart ached beneath.

"-to go away. If not the pain of losing you, then please...! Please, help me stop destroying our family..."

As though on queue, the once gentle breeze passing over him picked up, tossing the oak's branches about like they weighed nary a thing. Coincidence or not, Leo took this as a sign, steadying his breathing as best he could as he settled into a meditative stance...

~~~

("Twice" - Little Dragon)

"Somebody's suspiciously quiet-"

Eyes fluttering open, Leo found himself gazing down at Val's smiling face – back in the dream he awoke from this morning, and many other mornings of late.

Stealing a glance at the family portrait before them, the leader's blood cooled in his veins at the sudden lack of a smile upon his father's greying face...

"Hey, you okay?"

Val's hand had since abandoned his shoulder, and was caressing his cheek now with it. Her touch - it felt so good. So warm, comforting... Though it pained his heart greatly to do so, he plucked it from his scales. He had no choice – he had to put an end to this delusion.

"We need to talk," Leo murmured after finally, reluctantly releasing her.

He forced himself to watch his friend's face as disconcertion befell it, accompanied by the self-soothing encircling of her hands round her body. He granted her a moment to respond, assuming she were contemplating it. Yet her lips never parted. She simply stared. Watching. Waiting.

A mirage, this woman was; identical to the real Val in every way, save for what he hopelessly wished he could change – her feelings for him.

Without an impartial ear nor effective distraction (extra training, meditation, overtime – any excuse to keep himself out of the common areas or, in more desperate cases, the Lair entirely) to help him navigate this tragic situation, Leo finally turned to his dreams - to her.

She became an enthusiastic vessel upon which he'd unburden all his inhibitions; a mouthpiece for his deepest, darkest thoughts. There was certainly a word for it, but he feared he’d be sick if he entertained the thought any longer…

Desperate not to lose the one thing that brought him solace in his lonely world, he'd managed to convince himself that no actual harm was being committed. That, here, he was free to explore his feelings, understand them, then finally resolve them, without risk of destroying his family…

...How fucking naïve.

"I really wish we could've had this conversation in person but, after what Raph told me, I..." Leo swallowed hard, fighting like hell to keep her from seeing him cry. "Val, I'm... I'm so, incredibly sorry-"

“He’s lying to you, y’know.”

There it was – the hook – the fact-defying, ego-inflating siren call that had lured him in, time and time again. Heart still helplessly clinging to the impossible, Leo felt the temptation to bite… initially. “No, he’s not-”

“I’m not mad,” Val countered; tone suddenly forceful, eyes frantic. Like a wounded animal realising it’s being corralled into a corner. “Yeah, things could’ve ended a little less dramatically between Raph and I, b-but… I’m free, now. I-I… I thought you’d be happy about that-”

“No,” Leo whispered, blinking away a tear as he stiffly shook his head. “I’m not happy about that. I’m not happy about that, at all… Val, I’ve ruined everything-”

“But you haven’t-”

“Please-” The leader retreated from her advance, leaving her blinking in befuddlement. “I beg you- don’t… don’t do that.”

At that, the desperation on Val’s face swiftly devolved into distain. Dropping the outstretched hand to her hip, she scoffed at him.

You’re upset – good.

“I’ve not been a friend to you, nor a brother to Raph, for a long time-”

“Oh, save it!” The woman snapped, voice heavy as she, too, had grown emotional. “You used me… W-what, now that you’re facing some consequences, doing the right thing’s ideal??”

That struck a nerve. Jamming his tongue into the wall of his mouth, Leo swallowed the urge to defend himself. To deny. To lie. Val continued.

“Raph was right about you – you don’t give a shit about anyone but yourself… I knew what you were doing from the very start of this, trying to convince me that I was being abused; never mind your blatant boundary stomping I felt forced to overlook to ‘keep the peace’, nor the disgusting things you were doing to me inside your head – your best f-friend, Leo...! Y'know what, I-"

She abruptly faltered, agonising over whether to make known the thought clearly burning the tip of her tongue. The thought won out.

"I'm glad Splinter isn't here to see how far you've fallen!"

Leo damn near keeled over as all the air was unceremoniously forced from his lungs. To think it was one thing, but to put it out into the world, and have it come from her lips... he almost couldn't bare it.

After taking a moment to recollect himself, the leader managed a resigned, "I-I... agree."

Val blinked at him again, the tears pooling in her eyes finally streaking her cheeks. It took everything in him not to reach out, to wipe them away...

...to feel her skin beneath his fingers, one last time.

"You're right - I have been selfish, especially with you. Please, don't take what I'm about to say as an excuse, because it's not. I just... after dad, I... things got very dark for me. I put up so many walls, I pushed everyone out... But you - you managed to tear them all down; make me feel... whole, again. Alive. The fear of losing that's turned me into someone I don't recognise... I started seeing you not as my best friend, but as a prize to be won, and Raph an obstacle..."

She was fading - he could feel it. That weight on his heart was finally lifting. But instead of relief, it was promptly replaced by another kind of pain; the kind he desperately hoped would never return - the emptiness. The chasm in his soul his father had left behind...

Ironically, it felt right.

"This, between us, should’ve never happened – I’m sorry it did, and I’m sorry it's taken this long for me to see the pain I-I'd... You mean so much more to me t-than... this - so much more. And the thought of losing your friendship forever, I d-don't..."

Shakily lifting his gaze, Leo took in his friend's visage a final time, memorising it, before tearfully whispering:

"Goodbye, Valerie. I pray that, one day, you'll be able to forgive me..."

...And just like that - in a blink, she and the zen room were gone, and he was knelt before the grave once again; the gale having conspicuously settled. All that remained were the tears on his face, and determination in his heart.

Collecting the keys and solitary duffle bag from the van, Leo finally proceeded up the driveway to the farmhouse, to make himself comfortable.

--------------------------------

Masterlist | Chapter 27

@android-cap-007 @happymoonangel @miss-andromeda @mysticboombox @sketch-mer-6195 @jasminarts01 @obsessedftshit

[washa]

I listened to Vincent’s and Porter’s audio and here’s my favourite personal comments! (A decent amount of Vincent and Lovely Slander in this one, I mean it with love truly 🙏🙏)

A couple of seconds in and Vincent is already shitting on Porter

“I have tried to live my life these last three years focusing on the good” Lovely cannot relate 

Poor Sam bro why is he always like always involved when everything goes to shit 

NO BC VINCENT IS STRESSING LMFAOO

Lovely being the whole reason that the Solaire's hasn’t lost their minds

DARLIN’ AND VINCENT MOMENT??? FINALLY

Lumberjack??? I can’t get the image of a beaver out of my head

Sam therapy session is required in every second Shaw pack/Solaire video

Strangle. That’s kinky.

Vincent darling. You were an ass. Are we forgetting the whole breaking and entering thing?

Is Darlin’ just kicking their feet in the corner or something

HELP DID SAM INVITE PORTER WHAT THE FUCK IM CACKLING

Porter's jab at Sam clothing style is making me sob

“And here we go..” Now what would you think would happen Sam

“Wine gets better with age. Food, rots.” GAW DAMN PORTER THAT WAS SMOOTH

Loving the mutual hatred. It’s giving every enemies to lover troupe

“Eat shit asshole, Is that better?” Lovely put a muzzle on him.

I imagine Vincent swinging his hands around and pointing like a pixar character

broken found family is radiating off this video

I have never been so attracted to Sam right now (Actually that's a lie, This is Sam we're talking about he's always attractive.)

Porter and Vincent reminds me of those cats fighting in the dumpster in the rain and stirred with daddy issues

Oh poor Porter.. Actually that’s so sad. Is that why he’s like a masochist? Some sort of coping PTSD thing??

Porter has a very good point about Vincent looking like a spoilt brat but it’s clear there’s a misunderstanding

WHY IS THIS SO SAD??? OH MY GOD 

No Vincent… BROOOOO 😭

The silence is deafening

 this is what happens when there’s miscommunication everyone

YO PORTER DON'T BLAME SAM ABT NOT SAYING?? 

What..?

LOVELY???? HOLY SHIT DID THEY JUST PUNCH HIM

What’s wrong Porter? I thought you loved being punched??

For fucking sake this is so damn sad, my heart is crumbling like feta cheese.

Oh thank fuck they are acting somewhat civil people, even if they hate each other

Yes good job Switzerland A+

TREASURE??? NO WAY

Fucking hell this Summit is gonna go to ass isn’t it 😕

[themistressdomme]

hi mommy

this isn‘t related to anything sexual this time and I hope that‘s okay. if not please just delete this

i‘ve been feeling really awful and was wondering what youd do when your sub would feel like that?🥺

sorry if thats weird

-🐻‍❄️

Oh hi, little darling!

That's okay! Of course a non-sexual ask is okay, love!! It is absolutely more than okay 🤗

Thank you for coming to me when you're feeling so awful, darling, it means a lot 🥰 Now let's see how I can help, hm?

It would all depend on what you needed, love. Are you a physical-touch oriented sub when you're feeling like this? If so, I'd ask you if you wanted to climb into bed, where you can lie on my chest - put your ear close to me and feel my heartbeat, love. Let that regulate your breathing. "Deep breaths, in and out, in and out, that's it, you're doing so well." I'd hug you tight and close, giving you tiny kisses on your forehead, rubbing your back in slow circles. We could take a bath or shower together if you wanted, and I promise to take care of you. I'll wash you gently in your favorite scent, and I'd wash your hair, giving you a little scalp massage, if you wanted. All the whilst moving slowly, gently, kissing your little nose.

We can get back into bed and cuddle some more when we're done bathing ourselves, and I'd have changed the sheets so you have crisp, fresh sheets to snuggle into. Maybe we should order some of your favorite food, hm? We can eat whatever you want, and maybe put on a movie; anything to distract you, or entertain you, darling.

Do you just want some quiet time, with no other sounds? We can do that, I'll be sure to hold you close. Do you need words of affirmation? I'll tell you how incredible I think you are, and how perfect you are for me, how you know exactly what I need, and you're always good to deliver. "I'm so proud of you for making it through this hard day, love. I promise it won't feel like this forever. It's going to be all okay, and I'll be right here."

Do you like to be spoilt? Let's get into my car, darling, and I'll drive you wherever you wanted to go and get a little something for you. You want some arts and craft supplies, maybe a puzzle, and we can just put on some quiet music and do that for the rest of the night. Do you want something sweet or savory to end your awful day? Let's go, whatever you want to get, it's on me, doll.

I'm here for you, and I hope you feel like I am, love 🥰 It's never weird to ask for something like this, okay? I want my blog to not just be about sex; I want it to encompass the intricacies of our little community! Whether that be questions unrelated to sex, or even little scenarios like this. I always want you guys to feel cared for by lil ole me! 🤗

I hope tomorrow is a better day for you, my little polar bear darling! 🥰

🐻‍❄️

[saintsir4n]

8

WARNINGS: MENTIONS OF DEATH

"VEE, what the fuck is going on?" Felix asked his sister as he Calypso and Oliver all crouched around the top of the spiral staircase.

Venetia shushed him, "It's Farleigh."

Oliver softly asked, "What happened?"

"He tried to nick something."

Calypso didn't believe that, she could hear the faint arguing and Farleigh pleading with his aunt to believe him.

Felix gasped, "What are you talking about?"

Venetia softly scoffed,  "He's a fucking idiot."

"He's not a fucking idiot, he wouldn't do that," Calypso mumbled.

They heard Duncan demand, "Move!"

And with Elspeth's pleading Farleigh was escorted out.

Felix's soft eyes widened,  "Fuck."

That caught his mother's attention and they quickly dispersed.

___

"I mean, it's outrageous!" Venetia exclaimed, sunbathing on the small dock hovering over the pond.

The heat was even more outrageous, they all were spread out of the green, close to the edge of the pond, wearing swimsuits. Felix sat next to Oliver who had his knees to his chest and Calypso resting on a towel, wearing her prescription sunglasses as she tried to block out the speculation.

Oliver questioned, "What actually happened?"

Felix informed, "He sent an email to Sotheby's to say that he'd 'come by' some Palissy plates."

Venetia scoffed, "I mean, the idiot. He had to have known that Dad went to school with the chairman. I mean, talk about biting the hand. And Mum and Dad would give him anything he asked for."

"Yeah, well, obviously he got sick of asking."

"That's ridiculous. He's more spoilt than we are."

Calypso rolled her eyes, pulling out her phone to text Farleigh that she would try and convince his aunt and uncle to have him back, even though it was likely they would, everything was too stressful right now. She missed Farleigh and it had only been an hour, the guy was a prick but he held a place in her heart. He was the one to give her the nickname River – a bad joke about how it was Felix's middle name but it just stuck.

"I mean, come on, Vee. You... You have to admit. It's a little bit dark, him having to go to Mum and Dad with a begging bowl," Felix huffed.

"Oh, boo-fucking-hoo."

Calypso snapped, "Have a fucking brain. He didn't do anything."

"How would you know, trouble?" they all turned to her.

"He's your cousin," Calypso sat up, eyes darting between the siblings. "he's not thick enough to steal something belonging to any of you or anything at all, I mean for Christ's sake Felix you and him have matching rings," her love sheepishly glanced down at his signet ring. "There are certainly other people in this house more inclined to steal. Farleigh is a shit-stirring prick but not a liar," she targeted Oliver briefly. "Nor a thief. He's your cousin and you're all so quick to dispose of him."

"We're not disposing of him," Felix tried, but she only shook her head.

"You'll probably do the same to me next."

Felix was extremely hurt to hear that, even more, distressed that she was lying so far away from him.

Venetia went to say something but Oliver beat her to it,  "Cali, are you alright?"

She snapped her head towards him, and Felix and Venetia were shocked that he referred to her as that.

"I'm fine. Olly," Calypso muttered bitterly.

Felix didn't like her nickname rolling off Oliver's tongue, not one bit. He tried to get her attention but Venetia quickly warned them to stop speaking about Farleigh after seeing her parents stroll over.

"Guys, guys, guys."

Felix hushed, "Oliver, don't mention it, okay?"

Oliver's brows furrowed, "What happens if they bring him up?"

"They won't."

"What a glorious day," Sir James noted, walking beside his wife with his Panama hat in hand. "Never known a summer as hot as this one. Sweltering. I think it's even hotter than last year. I didn't think that was possible, but here we are again."

Calypso put down her phone when she caught Felix waving at her, she softly waved back annoyed that she couldn't ignore him.

"It's hotter than Barbados, apparently. Barbados!" Sir James said looking around.

Elspeth gushed, "No, I can believe it, darling."

"Honestly, I don't think I've ever been hotter in my life," he remained astonished as his wife collapsed into a lounge chair. "Oh, I need to check with Robert ...to make sure that he's being extra vigilant with the hydrangeas."

"Very wise, my love," Elspeth exhaled, "Oh, bliss. bliss, bliss, bliss." she hummed when she heard the song quietly playing. "Mmm! Oh, this song. God, I haven't heard this song in forever." She sighed, "I used to hang out with them all, actually, when I was modelling," she paused, "Your mother did too Calypso, right before your dad trapped her," Felix noted his love's face drop slightly. "Britpop, Blur, Oasis. God, the parties. Oh, but then, of course, 'Common People' came out and everybody thought it was written about me. Which was completely mortifying and ridiculous. I mean, I barely knew Jarvis."

Venetia called out,  "What? "

"She came from Greece. She had a thirst for knowledge. It couldn't have been me. I've never wanted to know anything." Elspeth groaned, "God, I wish we didn't have to go to London."

"I didn't know you were going to London," Felix said, playing with the grass beneath his feet.

"Pamela's funeral."

He replied softly, "Oh."

"Pamela died?" Oliver turned to him shocked, apparently, he was the only one who didn't know.

"Yeah."

"She'd do anything for attention."

Oliver seemed very affected by her sudden death, guilty almost.

"My love?" Felix called out to her.

"Hmm."

"Where's your necklace?" he noted her neck was bare and slowly she did too.

"Holy shit," Calyspo patted around, to see if it fell off but it didn't. "I think I took it off when I got in the bath, worried it was gonna slip down the drain."

Elspeth waved her off, "It's fine, if you lost it you can just get a new one."

"Fuck," she rushed off and Felix was quick to go after her.

"I don't know what the problem is, Felix will replace it," Elspeth breathed out.

___

"Cali it's okay, we'll find it," Felix watched his Calypso fall apart as she scoured his room, needing to find her necklace.

Her perfect dove necklace.

She didn't want to make a mess, with every movement she put his things back how they were, the same with the bathroom, not wanting to give anyone the excuse to get rid of her.

"I can't – I don't know where it is. I'm sorry," she revealed, with tears pooling in her eyes.

He immediately rushed over, cupping her face, as a way to calm her. Her crestfallen expression made his heart hurt, he couldn't bear to see her like this.

"Why are you apologising? It's fine if we can't find it," he tried, feeling her face tremble as she tried holding back her tears.

Her lip quivered, "How? You brought it for me ages ago."

"Maybe I could get a new one for you."

Her face tensed making him quickly regret the suggestion, she pushed his hands away, staggering back in disbelief.

"What?" she rasped, "It cost a fortune Felix, it has sentimental value you can't just replace it."

"I didn't mean it like that," he promised, he just wanted to find a solution.

One that would calm her down but she was a mess over this necklace.

He only ever saw her like this when her parent's neglect hit her particularly hard and he always knew how to cheer her up. Making her tea – with a lot of milk and three teaspoons of sugar, or buying her a vanilla latte before they took an evening stroll, reading books together or even talking about their day to each other.

But now, his brain was stuck, partially due to his cousin's absence, which clearly impacted her more than him.

"No I can't – you can't just get a new one. I want that one the original one," she stressed, breathing heavily as her glossy eyes darted around the room. "You can't replace something priceless. Please understand that."

"I do, I really do," he vigorously nodded, annoyed that he kept putting his foot in his mouth, "I mean, we'll try and find it. I'll get Vee and Olly to help."

He then saw her pull a face he was unfamiliar with.

It was nasty, nothing like her.

"No, not that freak," she spat, startling him.

Felix sighed, "Don't be like that."

"I don't trust him," she cried out, with a tear finally trickling down her face, steaming her glasses so she pulled them off, letting them drop to the floor. "I don't like him, he shouldn't be here. Farleigh should be."

He slowly approached again, "It's okay."

"It's not, I lost the necklace. I lost the necklace," she sobbed, "help me find it. Just you."

He wrapped his arm around her as tears soaked his chest, "I'll help you, pretty girl. I'll help you."

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

a/n:

my girl is going through it. yes, oliver took the necklace, sneaking into the bathroom after she took it off and left. it's a punishment, just like he set farleigh up after the the public embarrassment. you could say that he wants to make cali look insane in front of felix, but would that really work, considering felix just wants to make her happy and is in love with her?

the fact she had to defend farleigh again proves that not only did she care for him but that she understands that everything to the catton's is replaceable. so her losing her necklace and their solution is to get a new one is only adding to her fear. her fear of being abandoned and replaced like her family continue to do to her.

also, I started watching ugly betty again and I love the fashion from 2006/7 mainly the low-rise jeans and clingy vest tops.

[gabessquishytum]

hi there! long time reader, first time asker, big fan of the blog. I recently discovered this collaborative scifi universe call Human Domestication Guide (they have a wiki! their canon is fascinating) where a benevolent, very intelligent, functionally immortal, shapeshifting alien plant species called the Affini 'domesticated' all humans after the 'terran domestication war' against a capitalist imperialist human government and keep some of the humans as pets and use different kinds of 'xenodrugs' to keep them docile. it's v queer and kinky, with loads of bondage, medical kink, petplay etc.. big potential for monsterfucking tbh.

a majority of the stories in this universe, including the original one, features the relationship between a captured human rebellion soldier and her mistress, and dubcon/noncon brainwashing ensues. BUT, i can't help but wonder what would a war prize!hob & plant!dream HDG AU look like. i personally imagine hob would be just fully on board with such enthusiasm that even baffles dream! meanwhile hob is like nah he never really bought the propaganda of the terran navy anyways and now that he's seen how powerful & altruistic the affini civilisation is? humans never stood a chance. and needless to say the hedonist in hob nearly jumps at the opportunity to become this beautiful shapeshifting plant alien's (have you SEEN dream's plant-adjacent facets in the comics) very, very good human pet (and already halfway fallen in love)

-- 🌳 (if it's not already taken)

Oh I am SO intrigued by this concept!!! Thank you so much for introducing me to this! It sounds right up my street tbh, and I'm definitely going to check out the stories!

I love the idea of an all-powerful alien Dream!!! Especially with plant aspects. Like poppies spreading from his skin, vines twining down from his hair. Like, how is Hob NOT going to fall head over heels? He's been a solider doing shitty soldier things for so long and now he gets to hang out with this beautiful creature who WANTS him??? Literally a dream come true.

I'm imagining incredible potential for sexy outfits here. I mean, latex is usually not top of my kink list, but in a sci-fi universe it feels kind of necessary. Imagine Hob’s upper body beautifully encased in red latex, showing off all his curves and soft edges. He can hardly move but he loves feeling constricted like this. And Dream is so sweet to him when he gets all dolled up, telling Hob that he's the most beautiful pet, the most precious and most obedient.

I love the idea of alien Dream being very fascinated by Hob and his humanness, all his needs to eat and drink and sleep. He's so darling and fragile and Dream just adores taking care of him, keeping him well fed and maybe occasionally dosed up on fun space drugs. Hob loves his life as a spoilt pet who gets nice things and weird alien sex. The way he's gone from muscular, brutalised soldier to pampered well fed pet turns him on so much.

Screw it, if it's Hob, then I DO want to see him covered in latex. Especially the hoboobies. And if we're talking sci-fi, let's not forget the possibilities of oviposition...