#we're all mad here

[starfieldcanvas]

at the same time, you absolutely do run into people who are not just venting, they are actively opposed to taking action that would change their situation. this, too, has a variety of possible explanations!

the first one is that changing the situation involves a risk they don't know how to gauge because they've either never taken a similar risk before or they've only had bad experiences with taking that risk. this can be a Learned Helplessness problem, especially if you're talking about a lesson learned when someone was young and vulnerable; even if they're in a better place to take risks now, their brain doesn't necessarily believe that, and will continue to treat, say, establishing boundaries with their parents as if it's just as risky as when they were financially dependent and living at home.

the second is that they are getting something out of the situation being bad for them. this is what OP alludes to with "they just want you to feel bad about how bad they've got it." Sometimes, that's exactly what's going on, but usually it's more like they want to feel good about what a sympathetic victim they are, because a secure victim status makes them feel like they deserve to partake in certain indulgences—even cruelties. If your wife is a bitch to you, you can justify cheating on her. If you left her for someone else you actually liked, you'd have to be faithful. That's a pretty dramatic example, of course, but look out for the much pettier ways it crops up in your own relationships. You can catch yourself delaying the resolution of minor disagreements because, say, as long as you don't tell your friend you're hurt because they never left a comment on your latest fic, you get a tiny burst of aggrieved adrenaline and self-satisfaction for being a little cold to them when they obliviously reach out to you, or you'll delay getting up in the morning because you're annoyed that your mom sounded so condescending when she encouraged you to get up so you could 'actually make something of the weekend' and now it's 3 pm and you did in fact waste your Saturday and you're hungry and grumpy and still feel like it was your mom's fault even though it was your choice.

The strangest attitude I've ever seen on people about anything is when someone is aware that their situation is bad, and that other people have it better, and not only have their no intention to personally do anything to fix their situation, they'll actively fight you if you try to help them. They don't want their situation to get better. They just want you to feel bad about how bad they've got it.

[effortlesslysweet]

if i saw a white rabbit with a waistcoat and pocket watch running late, i'd follow him too ☁︎.𖥔 ݁ ˖

[autumnsunshine10]

(C)raving

I could spend a month of Sundays

Studying the constellations on your skin

Bathing in the lavender of your baritone

While you giddily storm my shores

Reciting poetry most quixotic

Feeding me pomegranate without seeds

No hide and seek, we're olly olly oxen free

Being who we are without restraint

I only feel at home whenever you're near

Wrap me in warmth to wickedly whisper

"We're all mad here"

[astrid-gallivan]

Playing around with some color design and markers wooooo.

Fire anyone? 🔥

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

hi honey, you look lovely

those hairdressers know nothing, you are absolutely radiant with that hair

Thank you so much!! That's so lovely of you to say xx

In gratitude, have these chats with @howmanyholesinswisscheese when I got back home and had to take an anti-allergen:

You're welcome good omens fandom xoxo

AND DON'T YOU ALL SAY A WORD TO ME, DURING THIS CONVERSATION ABOUT REPTILIAN PENISES, ARTHUR FOUND OUT THAT HEMIPENIS IS A TAG ON AO3 AND THERE ARE FICS. FOR A FANDOM ABOUT THE BIBLE, Y'ALL ARE CURSED. I'M JUST REPRESENTING YOU ACCURATELY AS YOUR MASCOT.

[carrythatwayt]

Lest they be forgot.

[magicaleraser94]

Setting up an Ides of March reminder in my calendar so I don't miss out on Tumblr's favorite national holiday (like I did last year ;-;)

[tvlipsandbread]

we're all mad here

[empress-sophie-pendragon]

I would've really loved to see Aemond and Viserys III together.

[funnytastic]

"Have I gone mad ?"

"I’m afraid so. You’re entirely bonkers. But I’ll tell you a secret. All the best people are."

[ometochtli2rabbit]

[starfieldcanvas]

hi not an expert but i thought i’d say something about the sysmed thing you posted

systems are formed by trauma at a young age causing a child’s personality to not form into one singular personality and instead split into multiple.

but theres also some people who “create” their system because they wanted to be a system, which just really isn’t possible. (or also “will” their system into being)

but i know most systems problems with the people who “create” their system (endogenic or willogenic) is the massive spreading of misinformation

i know people with did or osdd who when first realizing they were a system, and even still now, are told by endos that their trauma “isn’t enough” and that they’re endogenic too which also hurts people just discovering their a system thinking their endogenic because their trauma wasn’t enough or they don’t remember their trauma (which is a big part of did & osdd anyway, systems are typically formed to help the person deal with (by not dealing with) their trauma) and then people aren’t able to get the help they need

so, to someone pretty thoroughly outside the discourse, this largely reads like you've just got two different groups of people with similar conditions, and some people within each of those groups loudly assert that the other group cannot possibly be having the experience that group claims to be having. some traumagenic systems insist endogenic systems are "not really possible" and some endogenic systems think traumagenic systems "aren't really traumagenic" instead of both groups just taking for granted that obviously multiple kinds of experience can coexist without either invalidating the other.

it sounds strikingly similar to transmed discourse, so I understand why the "-med" language got borrowed.

about a dozen years ago I was up to date on the DID wiki page and was therefore fairly confident that so-called "multiple personalities" were all (I had to look this term up just now) iatrogenic, that is, caused by psychiatric leading. So when I came around to accepting that systems did seem to exist even in people who had never been to therapy, I assumed we were all lifting a middle finger to psychiatry's attempt to dismiss the system phenomenon. It's rather odd to learn that now there's a contingent insisting that they have psychiatric legitimacy but their endogenic "cousins" do not. like... y'all trust psychiatry to know what does and does not exist? when they largely didn't think traumagenic systems existed until very recently, and many within the institution still think it's 100% iatrogenic?

(i double checked with my local psychology graduate and indeed he was taught in school a decade ago that DID was a fringe diagnosis that did not really exist in modern practice.)

it's really just like transmeds then, isn't it? traumagenic systems have only barely gained a little bit of respect within the system and are still widely disbelieved, but instead of taking that as a sign that maybe psychiatry has only a very limited understanding of this phenomenon, some have decided to throw their endogenic cousins under the bus in a feeble, futile attempt to legitimize themselves.

whether or not endogenic systems really do "exist" in a meaningful way, i find the insistent rejection of them by people who are also frequently disbelieved by the institution to be shockingly shortsighted.

the primary objection to the possibility that endogenic systems exist cannot really be "some of them are assholes who spread misinformation". as that has literally nothing to do with whether or not they exist.

(and I feel obligated to ask if the "misinformation" in question is more often than not just "it's possible to be an endogenic system." because aphobes used to claim the statement "it's possible to be asexual as a minor" was grooming. so I don't take those kinds of accusations at face value anymore.)

or is it really just "the field of psychiatry has not agreed this experience is possible yet, so I am obligated to argue with anyone who reports their lived experience as counterevidence"? because as I have said, that just sounds like every past failure of the psychiatric imagination. advances in psychiatric research are very valuable, but if you're not familiar with the ways in which psychiatry as an institution tends to fall short of capturing reality, then you can't be trusted to wield its evidence in a responsible way.

are there contingents among the endogenic and traumagenic folks who simply believe in describing their own experience in appropriately limited terms, rather than aggressively insisting their experiences are universal for all systems???

[strawberross]

[eerieeccentrix]

[kneelingshadowsalome]

to show everyone how fucking pathetic (and delulu) i am, i would like to publicly announce that i just had a 20 minute crying session about könig. yes, about fucking könig. this is the first time i cry in 4 years and i was snivelling over the fact that my beloved blorbo doesn't even exist!!

like why can't he just waltz in and scoop me up in his arms like a tiny kitten?? huh??? why's he not here to sit me on his lap, over his massive fucking thighs, and pet me?? why's he not here to fuck me after a hard day? and fondle my tits like a squeezing toy? why's he not here to let me sweetly kiss his soft cheeks?? he's supposed to be showing me his knives!! and take me to the shooting range!! and feed me grapes!! (or blueberries in my case) huh?? HUH???

whERE IS HE?? WHERE DO I FIND HIM

Look, this is a safe space for being delulu 🩷💌 I'm a married adult woman with responsibilites and I'm still thinking about König 24/7 so who's the nutcase here ^^ But umm anyway the main point is that I find it tragic that all the thoughts I have of him are just thoughts since he's not even real. It's not fair!

Still, I find some comfort in the fact that there has to be someone close enough to König out there. Maybe he doesn't work for a PMC or maybe he's hairier than we've imagined or maybe he prefers dogs to cats but there has to be someone who wants to show you their knives, feed you berries and fuck you after a hard day! Call me crazy but that's how my man won my heart, he's not as tall as König and I'm the one who took him to the shooting range but we'll make do with what we have. Perhaps your own personal König is waiting for you somewhere without you even knowing it ❤️ Like seriously ppl, be careful what you wish for, you might just get it sometimes!

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Name at least one sane good omens fan, I'll wait... (you can't, we're all insane cuz we're a hivemind)

THERE ISN'T. NOPE. NOT ONE SINGLE ONE IN EXISTENCE.