#we write in our diaries here sir

[bunabi]

Thank you for your commentary about Veilguard. You're very thoughtful and full of kind, constructive criticism. I'm very tired of seeing OG fans be called "tourists" (or even fake fans!) for not finding Veilguard perfect. Your commentary makes me feel less alone. I wish you a wonderful New Year's.

Yeah I try not to look at what's happening outside my personal bubble lol. Treating anyone whos put 300+ hours into Dragon Age like they don't know what they're talking about is silly.

Criticism & venting is fine. I only ask that folks direct their frustrations to the right places.

Have a great new year! 🥳🎆

[transformers-nerd-13]

Alrighty, you asked for it, so you got it! Here's my analysis of Transformers G1; More than Meets the Eye: Part Two. I did an analysis of Part one yesterday so go read that if you are so inclined (you can find it on my page; I'm still learning Tumblr so I'm not sure how to link posts lol). Fair warning this is pretty long. Without further ado, let's get into it!

We open with a recap of what happened in the previous episode to remind the viewer of what happened last time. It's pretty rapid fire so I assume some of it had to be cut or it had to be pretty short for episode time. 

We're then introduced to Huffer (unfortunate name sir) who has his arm stuck in some debris. He calls for help and Brawn comes to his aid. Brawn uses a...well, it looks like a welder or a blowtorch but functions more like a laser so I'm not sure what to call this--to free Huffer. As soon as Huffer is free, both Huffer and Brawn fly off because at this point, all the Autobots could fly, ditching the other Autobots. Thanks for your help guys. 

We cut over to Prime who's still trying to free Spike and Sparkplug. Optimus tells Trailbreaker--who's currently helping the oil rig workers escape--to use his force field to suppress the flames. Not sure how effective this would really be, I mean if you trap the flames in a closed space, it'd eventually burn up all the oxygen and burn out, but this is an oil fire so it also has to run out of fuel--maybe I'm overthinking this; this is an 80's cartoon, they didn't care about physics. Wheeljack offers Trailbreaker a hand in suppressing the flames and the two take off. Trailbreaker uses his forcefield, but Wheelack proves that force field immediately redundant by using his built in fire extinguishers on the fire. Why didn't Prime just ask Wheeljack to use his fire extinguishers in the first place?? Why does Wheeljack never have these extinguishers again?? They would've really helped when the Dinobots or Autobot Spike started wrecking the Ark/Teletraan One. Just sayin.

Optimus gets Spike and Sparkplug free and Jazz uses his built-in grappling hook sort of like a fishing line to reel Optimus in, getting them to safety on a somehow steady piece of debris. 

Sparkplug doesn't exactly thank Optimus? He says "I don't know who you are, but you saved our lives." Seeming completely unbothered that he's talking to a giant robot. He should've at least properly thanked Optimus. Manners Sparkplug. Optimus tells them that they're Autobots from the planet Cybertron and that the ones who attacked the oil rig were called Decepticons. Robots in disguise my side function! Spike asks if there's anything he and Sparkplug can do to help the bots. Optimus tells them that the Autobots are the only ones who can stop the Decepticons, but Sparkplug points out that he and Spike know more about earth than the bots do.

Cut to later where the Autobots have apparently taken the two humans back to the ruins of the Ark where Spike is sitting on a nearby rock formation and writing in his diary or notebook about the Autobots. He says that he doesn't know if they're from the past or the future, but they're highly advanced robots who can think and have "real" feelings.

Spike. They literally told you they're from another planet. They are an alien species. You're talking about them like they're a human creation. 

We pan over to see Soundwave spying on Spike not very discreetly from behind a rock. That's gotta be a fragging tall rock. When did Soundwave get here and why is he here?? How did Teletraan not pick him up on the scanners???

Spike puts his notebook in his backpack and starts back toward the Ark, walking towards Soundwave, who transforms into his cassette player mode.

Spike spots his cassette player mode and picks it up, and even though it clearly has the Decepticon symbol on it he picks it up and takes it with him because he’s apparently blind. Spike enters the Ark, his backpack has apparently vanished into the void, and he puts Soundwave near Teletraan. This totally won't bite him in the ass later.

Spike asks Trailbreaker about Cybertron, but asks him why the Autobots transform--it's not a question about Cybertron, it's a question about CybertronIANS. He could've asked about Cybertronians and the question about why they transform wouldn't seem so out of place. Trailbreaker answers that they transform for disguise, and that it beats walking.

Sir, since you've gotten to earth, every single Cybertronian has had all the stealth of an elephant in a room with a floor covered in bubble wrap. Disguise my boron compressor.

Spike asks how they transform. We cut over to Ratchet's medbay where Ratchet is currently fixing Huffer's arm (I guess it got damaged from the debris??), Sunstreaker and Cliffjumper are also there in their alt modes for some reason. Mirage and Hound are also there for some reason. Trailbreaker and Spike have materialized in the medbay and Trailbreaker tells Mirage and Hound that Spike wants to know how they transform. Hound transforms, and that's apparently a good enough answer for Spike. T-cogs hadn't been invented yet, so I guess a demonstration of a transformation was the best answer they had at the time. 

Hound makes a hologram of a man in his driver's seat, and Spike asks "What other tricks can you do?" I don't really like the phrasing of that question; I'm not really sure why, but it just rubs me the wrong way. It would've been better if Spike had asked "What else can you do?" Idk that might just be a personal preference. 

Mirage shows off his invisibility powers before Hound offers Spike a ride and Spike accepts. 

Cut over to Soundwave who transforms into his bot mode (seriously Teletraan how are you not seeing this-) and ejects Ravage so that Ravage can enter Teletraan in his (G1 Ravage was a he because literally everyone was a he in Season 1 of G1) cassette mode to gather information on Earth's resources before Soundwave turns back into his cassette player mode and starts recording again for some reason. There's nobody else in the room, Soundwave. What are you recording?? Also why does Teletraan have a cassette port?? And why does Teletraan already have recorded information of Earth's resources?? When did it have time?? Who gave it that command?? Or did it just do that on its own?? So many questions lol. 

Cut over to Hound and Spike who are taking a drive through the desert where the Ark crashed (side note, are there any deserts with volcanoes??). Hound says that Earth must be a nice place to live. Spike replies that it's okay, but he wants to know more about Cybertron. Spike doesn't realize is that Hound is just as curious about Earth as he is about Cybertron, and while it may have been boring for the kids watching to have them exchange information about their respective home worlds, it would've been a nice bonding moment between the two. Hound tells Spike that before the war, Cybertron was quiet and peaceful. Spike asks if he misses it, and Hound replies "Sometimes" and they move on from this really quickly. Maybe because it’s painful for Hound to talk about. Of course Hound misses it; it was his home. But he can't afford to stay in a state of grief over the loss of his home because there's a war going on; he needs to push through and help the Autobots win the war so that they have a chance of seeing their home world again, even if it'll never be the same as it was. It hurts to think about what his home once was. Or maybe I'm reading too far into this again.

Spike and Hound make it back to the Ark, and Spike finally notices something fishy about that cassette player he brought back since it's recording data from Teletraan. Soundwave decides that the jig is up and transforms into his bot mode, trying to grab Spike, missing horribly as the human ducks to avoid him. Spike hits an alarm that he could somehow reach and Soundwave and Ravage (who ejected from Teletraan at Soundwave's command) make a run for it. Optimus (who appeared from the void) sees them running out of the Ark and says "A Decepticon! Get him!"

One, do you not know who Soundwave is?? Two, “Get him”. That was your whole plan. Get him (If anyone gets the reference put it in the comments). Good plan Optimus.

The Autobots however do not go after Soundwave and he gets away. Bumblebee and Brawn manage to catch Ravage but that lasts for all of two seconds before Ravage gets out of their grasp. Sideswipe and Jazz fire on Ravage but since they have the aim of Stormtroopers, they miss horribly. 

I am now half convinced that the only reason the war has gone on so long is because nobody on either side can aim for shit.

Ravage disappears into the shadows and suddenly nobody can see him anymore. Gears and Hound have suddenly replaced Sideswipe and Jazz. Optimus tells Gears to use his infrared (I guess Cybertronians show up in infrared light??) which just looks like a red flashlight (mhm yep that's definitely infrared) that allows them to spot Ravage. Jazz and Prowl fire a net and capture Ravage (pictured above with Gears’ “infrared” light).

Cut over to the cons where Soundwave is somehow playing back the information Ravage gathered from Teletraan about Sherman (Sherma maybe? If so then Senator Sherma’s—MTMTE—name is a very obscure reference.) Dam without actually having Ravage (no idea how that worked), presenting the dam as a potential power source to gather more Energon. Megatron commends Soundwave for a job well done, while Starscream says that the dam doesn't possess enough electrical power to make the Energon cubes. Megatron tells Starscream that "Your knowledge is only overshadowed by your stupidity" (one of my favorite lines), and that they're going to create a tidal wave big enough to send enough power surging through the dam to make all the Energon cubes they need. At least they're using clean energy I guess?

Cut to the next day at sunrise when the Decepticons arrive at the dam. Soundwave ejects Rumble who goes to the bottom of the river and uses his pile-drivers to create the tidal wave (I don't think this would actually work but I could be entirely wrong) while the other cons take off and head for the power plant (aka the dam).

The employees inside the dam notice that the gauges are going crazy and say something must be wrong while one guy smacks the gauges to try and fix them (solid plan sir that'll definitely work). One of the other employees tells them that the river's rising and tells the others to man their emergency stations. 

Cut over to the Ark where Teletraan tells Jazz and Spike in complete gibberish writing about the tidal wave at the dam and that the power output is ten times what it is normally. Jazz says that it could be the cons (it couldn't possibly be a natural disaster, it must be the Decepticons!) 

Cut over to the cons who have arrived at the dam and Megatron starts making demands, telling the employees who have not manned their emergency stations to do exactly as he says.

Quick cut over to the Autobots who are now on their way to the dam, Optimus telling the others: "Autobots, accelerate!" and they all keep going at the exact same speed they were going at before.

Back with the Decepticons in the dam, the employees say that the dam is gonna blow and that they've gotta get outta there. The Decepticons don't care though and start making their Energon cubes anyway. The Autobots arrive on the scene and Prowl briefly gets Optimus' voice before regaining his own voice again and asks if he really thinks the cons are behind this. Before Optimus can answer, he's cut off by Megatron firing a warning shot at them, telling them that they're too late. The bots take to the air while Hound and Spike find the heart of the tidal wave. Hound goes into the river to investigate and finds Rumble. 

Cut over to Ironhide and Bumblebee who are diverting the water of the river so that it doesn't cause too much flooding (yeah, that's how that works. Also how the heck does Bumblebee fit in the back of Ironhide's Alt Mode???) which they succeed in. 

The other Autobots arrive at the power plant where they all shoot at the plant and finally manage to hit something--that something being Starscream, as well as a tiny Starscream with no wings who never gets addressed--before entering the plant. The bots and cons duke it out while Sparkplug gets the employees out of the power plant. Mirage saves Cliffjumper from Thundercracker and Skywarp and Cliffjumper compliments Mirage’s combat skills.

Megatron and Optimus go one on one with each other and it looks like Megatron has the upper hand until Starscream uses a slingshot and whatever he fires from the slingshot hits the computers in the dam and explodes. The explosion causes Megatron to lose his upper hand. He and Optimus begin duking it out once again while the other cons make their getaway with the Energon cubes. 

Meanwhile, Spike is getting worried about Hound, who is still fighting Rumble underwater. Rumble traps Hound under some rocks and makes his way back up to the surface. For some reason Spike asks Rumble where Hound is, and Rumble just shoves Spike away as he walks off.

Rude.

Spike picks a fight with Rumble and loses in under five seconds. Spike calls for help which distracts Optimus from the fight, allowing Megatron the opportunity to knock Optimus off the dam they were fighting on seconds before and into the river below. Megatron mocks him and makes his escape with the other Decepticons as Optimus is sent down river. Jazz appears from the void and once again uses his grappling hook to get Optimus to shore for the second time this episode.

Cut over to Spike who seems to have been knocked unconscious by Rumble before he left with the other cons off screen and is now waking up. He calls out for Hound, but there's no reply, so he dives into the river to find him. He finds Hound remarkably quickly and manages to gain temporary super strength as he un-buries Hound enough so that Hound can get them both back up to the surface.

Apparently the short time Spike was underwater was long enough for him to almost drown (I guess he didn't take a deep enough breath before going under??) and Hound helps Spike recover from this but....it...it just looks wrong. So we're going to move swiftly onward. 

Cut to the other Autobots. Mirage suggests that they repair the Ark and go back to Cybertron and forget about the Decepticons. Optimus tells him that they can't do that; if Megatron succeeds here on Earth (presumably succeeding in gathering energy), he'll be impossible to beat on Cybertron. Huffer says that the bots aren't fighters like the cons are (haven't y'all been fighting a war for millions of years?? I'd assume you'd at least pick up some fighting skills in that amount of time). Optimus tells Huffer that "We must have courage. We can't ignore the danger; we must conquer it." A very good line. 

Cut to a quick montage of the cons getting more Energon cubes from various sources. Soundwave reports to Megatron that the new space cruiser is almost complete, but they still need 3,000 astroliters of energy (however much that is). They need one more source of energy to get this amount and the cons choose the Ruby Crystals of Burma as their energy source since they're apparently the richest source of energy on the face of the earth. 

Starscream tests their Energon using a giant blaster hooked up to some of Energon cubes and firing on a mountain to ensure that the cubes actually work. Megatron calls him a fool for wasting the energy, but Starscream tells him that he didn't know for sure that they worked because they never tested them. In Starscream's defense, it was a good idea to make sure they actually worked to make sure that their hard work and plundering of resources wasn't for nothing, but it probably should've been done earlier and now they need even more energy to replace the amount that Starscream used by firing that blaster, which, needless to say, annoys Megatron since he's now set them back and they don't have the time to replace it. Except they do because Soundwave informs them of the existence of rocket fuel which they could plunder to make more energon cubes. 

Cut over to a lake not too far away from the cons where Trailbreaker is listening in on the cons plans using his satellite dish and Spike and Sparkplug are calmly drinking tea. They hear the con's plan and go to radio Prime.

Cut back to the cons where Starscream (unprompted) is telling Megatron not to test him and that his desire for power is as great as Megatron's. Megatron tells him that "Power flows to the one who knows how; desire is not enough." How what?? How to use it??? Probably what they meant. Starscream tells him that time makes all things possible, and that he can wait. A strike force of cons (aka every con who we've seen thus far) is assembled and they take off for the crystal mines. This interaction would've been better if it'd been before Soundwave telling them about the rocket fuel because it would give Starscream just cause to be annoyed because Megatron is yelling at him for performing a necessary experiment to ensure that what they'd been doing was actually working. Soundwave could've interjected after Starscream had said that he could wait, telling them about the rocket fuel and thus diffusing the situation. 

Cut to Trailbreaker, Spike and Sparkplug who've decided to drive back to the Ark and report back to Prime in person instead of radioing him off screen for some reason--maybe Trailbreaker's radio wasn't working? Thundercracker and Skywarp attack them on their way back (for some reason--how did they find them??) and since Trailbreaker isn't built for speed, they radio the Ark for backup.

So Trailbreaker's radio was working?? Why didn't you just radio Prime earlier???

Their backup arrives literally five seconds later in the form of Sideswipe and Sunstreaker who either drove at the speed of ZOOM to get there that fast or they weren't too far from the Ark, but if it was the latter, they really didn't need the backup because they would've arrived not long after, so I'm going to assume it was the former. Sunstreaker gets hit but it's only enough to damage his new paint job. He shoots Thundercracker in response (the autobots have good aim this episode) and apparently this is enough to send Thundercracker back for repairs. Skywarp accompanies him back to Decepticon HQ, but it never gets brought up again so we're going to ignore it. Trailbreaker thanks the twins for their help. Sunstreaker complains about his damaged paint job but Sideswipe tells him that nobody will notice if Sunstreaker only makes left turns.

I don't think that's how that works, but okay. 

Cut to the Decepticons who are currently in the crystal mines making Energon cubes. Somehow Skywarp and Thundercracker have already made it here and both are completely fine. Soundwave says that there's enough crystals in the mine to power the whole planet of Cybertron. So you guys don't need the rocket fuel after all??

Cut to the Autobots who've made it to just outside of the mines. Wheeljack suggests using a bomb of his to bury the Decepticons forever. They know the cons are in the mines, they just don't know where. Bumblebee and Sparkplug (who apparently used to work in these mines??) volunteer to go into the mine, find the cons, and plant the bomb. Wheeljack warns them that once they push the button to detonate the explosive, they have exactly one minute to get out of there. Prime tells the two that if there's any problems to get out of there. Sparkplug assures Prime that there won't be any problems.

Foreshadowing.

Bee and Sparkplug make it into the mines without much issue and place the bomb, but when they try to get out, they're caught by Thundercracker and Skywarp who start beating them up. 

Back outside, Jazz comments that the two should be out of there by now and Prime is getting worried. Ironhide volunteers to go check it out but Optimus says he'll go. Backup is offered but he refuses, telling the other bots that if he's not back in five minutes to come get him.

Optimus sends his drone Roller who sounds like R2D2 and will only appear in a handful of other episodes to go investigate just before the bomb detonates.

The bomb goes off and everyone inside of the mine is buried and Optimus is sent barrel-rolling dramatically in slow motion down the cliff side, leaving us with a cliffhanger. 

And that was the second episode of the Transformers. It crams a lot into one episode, but somehow when you watch it, it doesn't feel too rushed. I do wish they'd taken some more time for the humans and the Autobots to learn about and understand each other, but I understand that there was a time limit on the episode and these interactions may have been considered boring by the kids watching at home. Overall it's a very fun watch though.

I hope this was enjoyable! I'll probably be putting out my analysis of Part 3 within the next few days. Hope to see you there!

[areyougonnabe]

I know nothing about polar exploration! Or Shackleton! But you seem excited about it!

Have a favourite fact you'd like to share?!?

well my two favorite facts have already been shared which are the cautionary tale of the toxic polar polycule and the story of the antarctic lovebirds !!!

but here is a contender for #3... the tale of jessamine.

let's start with our homies Deb (left) and Griff (right), aka Frank Debenham and T. Griffith Taylor, the geologists of terra nova's cape evans shore party:

they would both later go onto impressive careers in academia, start families, basically be well-liked hard-working guys (also participants in 20th century imperialism but let's take that as given based on our starting point of this expedition lol)

BUT we are meeting them here, in antarctica, aged 27 and 30, "Early Career Researchers" as we might call them now. trying to keep busy with SCIENCE during the long antarctic winter night of 1911!!!!!

these guys go way back btw. Deb was born and raised in Australia and and Griff moved to Australia when he was a kid, and they both attended the fancy-schmancy King's School near Sydney, the Australian equivalent of british public school (e.g. Eton). according to griff they were family friends at that time although they would have been a few years apart at school.

later around 1908 they both studied at the University of Sydney under leading geologist Sir Edgeworth David, who had been on Shackleton's Nimrod expedition and reached the South Magnetic Pole with Mawson. They both ended up being hired onto Scott's expedition through university connections, Deb via Professor David and Griff through a scholarship to Cambridge where he met Wilson.

okay. backstory established. now one thing you need to know about Griff is that he was a total freak. like Racovitza, he was a Poster before there were online platforms to Post on. if you had that kind of brain back then, and no access to adderall, you had to just sit around inventing new kinds of science instead of deep-frying spongebob screencaps. he was a consummate edwardian memelord who would read a novel per day and still have time to write 20 pages of diary in which he would floridly record the silliest things that happened since the morning, the various quirks and quotes of expedition members, and then complain about captain scott in shorthand.

to say nothing of his passion for CREATIVE WRITING! vitally, Griff was one of the main contributors to the Cape Evans hut magazine, the South Polar Times edited by Apsley Cherry-Garrard. there were 3 issues of this during the winter of 1911 and 1 issue during the winter of 1912, the latter of which included much material written/submitted during 1911 before the polar party met with tragedy.

Griff was a versatile writer, and his pieces (which would sometimes cumulatively make up nearly half an issue of the SPT by page count) ran the gamut from expository nonfiction to speculative poetry to comedic epistolary to magazine pastiche. he had certain motifs that he frequently returned to—none as compelling, in my opinion, as that of Jessamine. or Jasmine, or Jessie, or Jessica, as the case may be...

it all began, according to Griff's diary, early in the austral winter of 1911, when Deb was "christened Jasmine by Titus [Oates]."

where this nickname came from is unclear—many of the men had picked up female nicknames on the voyage down (see "Jane" Atkinson, "Marie" Nelson, "Penelope" Pennell) but Deb had not been on the voyage down because he had gotten picked up in Australia, so this may have been a belated attempt to correct that omission. Griff wrote in his book about the expedition, "We were short of female society—which lack also accounts for Jessie Debenham as an alternative to Deb."

in any case, the name clearly caught on: on midwinter day, a little under two months after the nickname's debut, Griff recorded that during the gift exchange after dinner "Every second present or so was a necklace or earrings for Miss Jessie Debenham."

(deb and titus at midwinter dinner)

THIS GOT REALLY LONG SO CLICK READ MORE IF YOU ARE INTERESTED!!

in the second SPT issue of 1911, Griff's 17-page narrative "The Bipes" describes the inhabitants of the Cape Evans hut from the perspective of a rabbit who lives in the stables. you can read the whole thing here and please do!!! (you'll need a VPN outside the US) BUT here is the relevant bit dealing with Deb:

U. PULCHERRIMA. This Bipe inhabits a strongly defended Bungkh in the Ubdug burrow. It is supported by mighty baulks of timber and can only be reached by means of a dangerous ladder. The Bungkh is supplied with heavy hammers, piles of stones and other offensive weapons. These precautions are, I believe, necessary in the Bipe courtship, for she is often called upon to repel members of other burrows who approach her balcony with blandishments. Her time is chiefly occupied with a primitive quern or handmill, and at this she grinds for long hours every day. I judge that this merely satisfies some primitive habit, for no flour seems to be produced. But it is pleasant to see how strong is the feminine instinct.

the species name "Pulcherrima" is also the species name of the pointsetta flower, and can be translated to "beautiful woman" (i think??)

here's the illustration produced by Bill Wilson (based on Griff's sketch) to accompany the above - yes that's a portrait of Griff in her bunk and Birdie below attempting to woo her:

it must be noted that Meares, nicknamed "Mother," also gets cast in a female role in the Bipes piece, but does not receive the privilege of being drawn in a skirt, rip.

anyway, the next issue of the SPT, vol 3 issue III, is the last one to be produced before the end of winter. Griff decided to one-up himself and write a piece in which Jessamine takes center stage. The Ladies Letter is a pitch-perfect parody of the "Ladies Column" sections that appeared in many periodicals of the era—full of french fashion terms and simpering style suggestions. Griff brilliantly adapts the format for a pastiche on the subject of Antarctic fashion; not free, naturally, from general whiffs of period-typical misogyny, but as those being mocked in specific are fellow expedition members and not any actual women i forgive him.

written in the form of a letter from Jessamine to her absent friend Cynthia (whose identity i'm unsure of BUT i'm tempted to say is supposed to be Priestley, away at Cape Adare), the piece again features multiple expedition members in female roles, including Silas as "American" Sally Wright, Cherry as "Madame Chérie - that dear delightful person - who builds her beautiful creations on strictly scientific principles of hygiene and aesthetics" and Birdie as Madame Berdé, who "finds that for well developed figures it is most distinctive to use a cross-gartering well above the ankle. She herself is naturally a consistent exponent of this latter fashion."

and then of course there is Jessamine's star turn. she is wearing the newest fashion, "a modification of last year's 'tube skirt' [which] even more closely swathes the lower limbs, and it is necessary that the wearer should be rolled along by her maid."

Jessamine reveals that she is planning to induce Titus Oates to bring her a proposal of marriage through the clever use of themed charms on her chatelaine.

All the smartest girls have wreathed chains of mascots around the skirt, and a pretty idea, which I commend to you, is to have silver model made of those articles which interest THE ONLY MAN WHO COUNTS. Breathe this to no one! But Mappin & Webb are making me such a choice set. The cutest little pony; a horse snowshoe (this is very lucky); a dead rabbit; a popgun; and a silver blazon PER MARE PER TERRAM PRO TITO; this will be attached to my 'tube', and then I really do expect to bring him to a proposal.

this scenario was illustrated hilariously by Bill, complete with Jessamine being rolled along, and Titus ignoring her as could be expected, in favor of a pony (Christopher?):

now, Deb is on record saying that Titus was his best friend on the expedition, but it may well be a classic case of "you are not your best friend's best friend," because per other accounts Oates was much closer to Meares and Atch than he was to Deb. that's just an observation to add a little flavor to Jessamine's desperate pursuit as portrayed here...

and not to look a gift horse (ha) in the mouth, but i do feel that Bill's illustrations don't quiiiiiite do the genderfuckery of Griff's text justice—Jessamine describes herself as wearing a frock inspired by the aurora, but Bill instead draws Deb in normal sledging gear plus some non-dress-shaped colorful streamers. a missed opportunity...

also, lest you think that Griff was the only one partaking in the Jessamine joke in the SPT, there is also a sneaky reference in the anonymous feature "My Favorite Book":

(J-SS-- [JESSIE]: "Not like other girls")

BUT WAIT. THERE'S EVEN MORE.

viewing the handwritten drafts of the SPT held at the SPRI (because all of this is going to be an actual academic paper someday hopefully lol), i learned that there were a fair handful of references omitted from the final version, presumably thanks to Cherry's editorial oversight.

one "answer to correspondents" written by "Marie" Nelson went as follows:

Jessica: A single lady cannot be too careful about the respectability of her lodgings or the character of her companions.

(referencing Deb bunking with Griff and Gran, two of the more annoying/messy people in the hut)

and an unused entry in "Songs And Their Singers" by Teddy Evans was:

Oh What’s Womans Duty - Jasmin

lastly, and most importantly, the drafts contained the one instance i could find of deb firing back about this whole thing.

vol IV of the SPT consisted of one issue released during winter 1912, when a lot of people had gone home (including Griff), and everyone left behind knew the polar party was dead and they'd have to go look for their bodies in the spring. it was not a fun time. vol IV contained a lot of material written the previous year but not included, since for obvious reasons folks weren't really up to being silly. one of those pieces was "A Day's Doings, Told By Our Diarist," written during winter 1911 by Deb as a parody of Griff. it's pretty funny in published form (p. 72 of this pdf)—Deb is on-point mocking Griff's dislike of eating ("Breakfast is an unintellectual meal, so gave it a miss. Better a bit more bunk than a bite more breakfast.") and his never-ending theorizing ("Thought out a new theory as to the origin of debris cones: yesterday’s wasn’t good enough").

however, the draft is exponentially more hilarious. Cherry, damn him, cut the absolute BEST BIT:

Made a genre sketch of Jasmine brushing her (his) hair – it’s a fool nickname anyways, mixes up the genders. 

knowing Deb—quiet, patient, chronically non-confrontational—that's about as explicit as he was willing to get, as far as revealing how he felt about the nickname. writing Griff realizing that it's a bit silly, he reveals to some degree his own discomfort. now, was it a "protest too much" situation or had he genuinely gotten fed up with being the Designated Girl Of The Hut? we shall never know!!!!!!!!

however the draft of the piece ends thusly: "[I] got paralysed at chess by the wily Jasmine, it’s a mud game, if ever there was one. Hinc illae lacrimae!"

so despite all the aspersions cast on her honor, and the failure of Titus Oates to accept her proposal, Jessie still triumphs in the end :)))

[burningvelvet]

On this day, 189 years ago: 16-year-old Emily Brontë and 14-year-old Anne Brontë write a diary entry:

November the 24

1834 Monday

Emily Jane Brontë

Anne Brontë

I fed Rainbow, Diamond Snowflake Jasper pheasant this morning. Branwell went down to Mr. Driver's and brought news that Sir Robert Peel was going to be invited to stand for Leeds. Anne and I have been peeling apples for Charlotte to make us an apple pudding and for Aunt nuts and apples. Charlotte said she made puddings perfectly and she was of a quick but limited intellect. Taby said just now Come Anne pilloputate (i.e. pill a potato). Aunt has come into the kitchen just now and said where are your feet Anne? Anne answered On the floor Aunt. papa opened the parlour door and gave Branwell a letter saying here Branwell read this and show it to your Aunt and Charlotte – The Gondals are discovering the interior of Gaaldine, Sally Mosley is washing in the back kitchen.

It is past Twelve o'clock. Anne and I have not tidied ourselves, done our bedwork or done our lessons and we want to go out to play. We are going to have for Dinner Boiled Beef, Turnips, potatoes and applepudding. The Kitchin is in a very untidy state. Anne and I have not done our music exercise which consists of b major. Taby said on my putting a pen in her face Ya pitter pottering there instead of pilling a potate. I answered O Dear, O Dear, O dear I will directly. With that I get up, take a knife and begin pilling (finished) pilling the potatoes. Papa going to walk. Mr. Sunderland expected.

        Anne and I say I wonder what we shall be like and what we shall be and where we shall be if all goes on well in the year 1874 – in which year I shall be in my 54th year Anne will be going in her 55th year Branwell will be going in his 58th year And Charlotte in her 59th year hoping we shall all be well at that time we close our paper

Emily and Anne

November the 24 1834

[exaltedfuzz]

Oh man, that three-part comic you posted. Such wonderful Skye sisters bits.... And making me want to take out Gant's knees with a baseball bat. >:| Really good content, loved the bit with the Snackoos, and the part with "SHE needs YOU?" Gant's notepad is a nice touch! Would you mind transcribing it though? Some of it is a bit hard to read. ^^; (Tiny side-note, but your British is showing; they drive on the right side in America, which means the driver's seat is on the left side of vehicles. :v )

Thank you so much! Really glad I could get both the sisters and Gant across successfully. It was originally a screenplay, so enjoy reading!

(I did realise that about the car. I didn't really want to re-layout everything... Besides, write what you know, right?)

Anyway! Here's my screenplay, under the cut. I figure pages and pages of text isn't fair to make people scroll through on my blog.

(And, in case you haven't seen it, here is my comic!)

SCENE - GANT and LANA’s office. They’re having a meeting. (set shortly after SL9)

GANT

Mighty fine to see you, Miss Skye. (shaking head) You’re always so busy… (looking up) How’s your sister?

LANA

Fine. She’s (looking aside) doing very well at school.

GANT

Such a smart girl. (nodding towards Lana) Like her big sister.

LANA

Thank you, sir.

GANT

I know you took the advanced bar. You ought to have told me yourself, Lana.

LANA

I… I did. I’m waiting on the results.

GANT

Oh, I can tell you. You passed with flying colors. Such a smart girl.

LANA

It’s a relief to hear.

GANT

Oh, Lana, don’t be so tense - we’re friends here. You and me.

Beat

‘Cause, remember, I’m the only one who knows. (uncomfortable smile)

LANA

Yes, sir. 

GANT

Lana, please - Damon. Not sir. I’ve told you before.

LANA

Yes, Damon.

GANT

(claps) That’s right. I’m so very proud of you, you know.

Beat

And I’ve done something for you.

Beat

Oh, you don’t have to thank me.

LANA

…What is it?

GANT

I’ve fast tracked you. Pulled a few strings. Talked to Blaisey, talked to the P.I.C. (very enunciated)

LANA

You didn’t have to, sir.

GANT

Oh yes, I did.  Chief Prosecutor Lana Skye.

LANA

(taken aback) Sir-

GANT

Damon.

LANA

(leaning forward in chair) Police Chief Gant, SIR! I can’t possibly accept that. What of…

GANT

Calm down, young lady. Manny? Oh, he’ll live. The prosecutors’ office needs you. You know I’m all for feminism, women in leadership.

LANA

I’ve never prosecuted in my life.

GANT

Oh, Lana, don’t talk like that. You wouldn’t want anything to happen to Ema, would you?

(Lana sits back in her seat)

Beat

I know you’re raising her on your own.

Beat

On a detective’s salary, no less.

LANA

No. Yes, I mean.

GANT

(laugh) Oh, Lana, you are a funny one. (suddenly serious) But you know what Ema did.

LANA

(chewing her nails) Yes.

GANT

It would be a shame. She’s all geared up to take up a prime position in the lab soon as she’s out of school…

LANA

She doesn’t need any help.

GANT

Oh, but she does. Did you forget? Our very own Neil Marshall…

Beat

What a diligent boy. Little too much for his own good. Maybe. (laugh)

Beat

Oh, whoops! Remind me, who killed Neil Marshall?

LANA

…Joe Darke.

GANT

Come on now. Say it with me, Lana. Ema Skye.

Beat

LANA

It was an accident.

GANT

Well, sure. That’s why we’ve worked so hard to make Ema innocent.

Beat

But I need you in the chief prosecutor’s office.

Beat

You look queasy. Why don’t we go for a swim?

LANA

I didn’t bring a swimsuit.

GANT

(laugh) Oh, you crack me up. Tomorrow, we’ll go swimming. Don’t forget, OK? I’m writing it in my diary.

LANA

I booked tomorrow off. 

GANT

Oh, did you, now?

LANA

It’s Ema’s birthday. And parents' evening.

GANT

Oh, alright then.

Beat

It must be so hard on you. 

LANA

Not at all.

GANT

Oh, don’t lie to me, Lana. Deceit isn’t a good look on you.

LANA

I’m proud to have a sister like Ema. She’s not a burden on me, if that’s what you’re implying.

GANT

Oh, no, no, no. I’d never say anything of the sort. You’re just… always so busy. Maybe it’d be for the best to send her off to a boarding school, or the like.

LANA

SIR! (clearing throat) She… needs to stay with me.

Beat

GANT

My, so animated. Tell me, “she needs to stay with you”, or “you need her to stay with you”?

LANA

(snapping, suddenly) Don’t-

GANT

Don’t what? Go on.

LANA

I do need her. She’s my sister. That doesn’t make me weak.

GANT

Oh, no. Strongest lady in the force. Soon to be strongest lady in the prosecutors’ office.

LANA

(hanging head) Yes, sir.

Beat

Damon.

GANT

Oh, I’m so happy to hear it. You and me, we’ll make sure all criminals get their just desserts. Right?

LANA

(muttered) What is “just” about this?

GANT

Watch your words, Lana. You know I take my job very seriously.

Beat

Let me know how Ema’s parents’ evening goes. Tell her uncle Damon says hi. I’ll be sure to get her a present, alright?

LANA

Since when are you “uncle” Damon?

GANT

Well, Chief Prosecutor Skye, we’re friends here, you and me.

Beat

And I’m uncle Damon.

Beat

Tell me, what does she like?

LANA

…Forensic science.

GANT

(laugh) Oh, surely there’s something a little less morbid.

LANA

(pause) I…

GANT

Surely you know. You’re such a good big sister, after all.

LANA

…She likes lots of things. It’s hard to keep up. She’s in a few clubs.

GANT

Oh, Lana… You’ve been working hard.

LANA

Don’t use that tone with me, sir.

GANT

(laugh) I’ll find her something. Why don’t I take you both swimming? 

LANA

Please don’t worry about it. Ema’s not really big on swimming.

GANT

Oh, so you do know! What a good big sister.

LANA

… Don’t come by the house, please. 

GANT

Aw, Lana. Don’t be like that.

LANA

I mean it. She told me she just wants things to be quiet.

GANT

Mmm. I’ll swing by the school carpark. 

LANA

… Fine.

GANT

Wonderful! Oh, I’m so happy. Really, I am.

Beat

Where is she now, Chief Prosecutor?

LANA

Afterschool hockey.

GANT

Mmm. Is she good at it?

LANA

I think so.

GANT

Mmm. Did you do any sports in high school, Chief Prosecutor?

Beat

LANA

…I did. Netball.

GANT

Oh! How wonderful! We should play a game of beach volleyball sometime.

LANA

Different thing. 

GANT

(laugh) Stubborn as always, Lana!

LANA

(checks watch [6:30] and abruptly stands) Sir.

GANT

Damon.

LANA

Damon - I need to leave.

GANT

Mmm.. Yes… I thought as such. After school clubs seldom run on quite so long as this.

Beat

But you will take up the position?

LANA

… Chief Prosecutor?

GANT

Oh, yes. You’ll be perfect.

LANA

I see no other choice.

GANT

Wonderful, really. I’m so glad we have this partnership, Lana. Sorry. Chief Prosecutor Skye.

LANA

Yes. Damon.

GANT

Now go on, get. Your baby sister’s waiting.

SCENE - EMA is waiting in the rain under a small shelter in the school car park. It’s getting dark, and she keeps looking at her watch. LANA’s car pulls up, and she winds the window down.

LANA

I’m so sorry, Ema.

EMA

… It’s been over an hour.

LANA

Just… Get in the car.

EMA puts her bags in the boot and sits in the passenger seat beside LANA.

LANA

(turning car around) Did you have a nice day?

EMA

Mm.

LANA

What did you have?

EMA

Chemistry. And Biology. 

LANA

And…?

EMA

And lunch.

LANA

You’re not skipping classes, are you?

EMA

No.

LANA

Then what did you have?

EMA

Math.

Beat

And English.

LANA

… How were they?

EMA

Same as always.

LANA

Working hard?

EMA

Mhm.

Beat

Um. What did you do today?

LANA

Well, paperwork, mostly.

Beat

… I have good news.

EMA

Hm?

LANA

I’m getting promoted.

EMA

Oh, what? Cool!

LANA

Mm. So, I’ll buy you something nice with my first big new paycheque.

EMA

How about a lab?

LANA

I don’t know about that… How about some proper tools? To get you started on your big forensic lab?

EMA

…That would be really cool.

Beat

So, you’re what, deputy? Vice deputy?

LANA

… Well, I have some more good news. Do you remember a few months ago when I took the advanced bar?

EMA

Mm…

LANA

Well, I passed! “With flying colors”, says Mr. Gant.

EMA

Hey! That’s great news!

LANA

… So I'm actually district Chief Prosecutor. Isn’t that exciting?

EMA

Huh?

LANA

Mr. Gant says I’ll be perfect for it.

EMA

… Wow. That must be a lot of responsibility.

LANA

It is. I’m sorry, Ema. I was in a meeting with Mr. Gant. That’s why I was so late.

Beat

He’s very insistent.

EMA

Maybe I should start driving myself home.

LANA

Don’t be ridiculous. You’re thirteen.

EMA

… Would you take me to court over it?

LANA

Yes. And myself, for neglect.

EMA

You’re so serious.

LANA

Correct.

Beat

Serious about making sure you have a great time on your birthday. (weak smile )

EMA

(weak laugh) Yeah?

LANA 

Mhm. I got you something today. Just in my bag. Have a rummage.

EMA leans back to grab a packet of snackoos out of Lana’s satchel.

LANA

I hope it’s the right thing. Not much, just from the vending machine at work. I promise I’ll get you something better tomorrow.

EMA

… Thanks. (crinkling packet between hands) I like these.

LANA

Oh, good. I wasn’t sure. Let me try one?

EMA

(opening bag) Alright.

LANA and EMA both eat

EMA

So… You’re Chief Prosecutor Skye?

LANA

Mhm.

EMA

Almost as cool as Dr. Skye, forensic expert.

LANA

… And I’m guessing that’s you?

EMA

Soon.

LANA

… Finish high school first, ok?

Beat

Ema, are you sure you still want to work with the force?

Beat

It’s ok if you don’t. The past few months have been a lot.

EMA

… I’m tough.

LANA

You are. 

Beat

I’m very proud of you, Ema.

Beat

You know what? Let's get a takeaway to celebrate. My promotion and your birthday.

[changingplumbob]

New Goth: Chapter 4, Part 2

Saturday is date night!

Back home Alexander works out his frustrations on a punching bag. Dina always manages to rile him up. He’s also discovered he has ADHD, Cassandra’s diagnosis had him look into it. James may fit in a workout but he does get very tired afterwards. What can turn that frown upside down? A cat! He goes in search of someone fluffy, Hamlet is playing on the cat tree upstairs.

James: Hey boy, can I have a couch snuggle

Hamlet: *meows* Of course dad

James: You look good in that cape. We must get you a special look for Harvestfest, we want to impress the guests

Hamlet: *purrs* We will if I’m there

Settling down with the oldest journal Milton begins to read.

Dear diary, how exciting is that to write! I got 10 out of 10 on my spelling tests all month so daddy bought me the journal I wanted. I’m excited to start keeping proper track of things. Yes I’m 8 but never to early to organise. Michael makes fun of me but I know he’d never peek. Sometimes I think I have the best older brother in the world…

Milton: I know the feeling mummy

Alexander: Can you follow the star Gertrude

Gertrude: *meows* Oh it is so dead

Alexander: Where’d it go? Where’d it go

Gertrude: *meows* I got it! Wait… get back here star!

Alexander: I think I’ve tortured you enough for one day *turns off laser pointer*

Gertrude: *meows* It… vanished???

Alexander: Here, how about a brush. You do look impressive in the armour but we must keep your coat looking as lovely as you

Hamlet: *meows* I am more impressive

Gertrude: *purrs* dream on son

Milton: Alexander?

Alexander: We’re in here

Milton: I wanted to say thanks to you and Uncle James for the new room

James: You’re very welcome

Milton: I know you have your date but when you get back could we maybe… just for tonight… have a sleepover in my room

Alexander: That sounds fun but I don’t know if James’ back will-

James: I would love a sleepover Milton

Milton’s face lights up at this news.

Milton: I’ll see you later then. Come home safe... promise?

Alexander: We will Milton, I promise

We head to Chez Llama where our normal greeter is on duty.

Caleb: Name?

Alexander: There should be a reservation under Goth

Caleb: Under Goth? Are you sure

Alexander: Yes I made the reservation myself

Caleb flicks his eyes over Alexander’s suit, his aged companion and the space where a celebrity shine isn’t.

Caleb: Yes... well we are very busy tonight

Alexander: No one is in the restaurant yet

Caleb: We have many distinguished patrons, we must keep room for them

Alexander: My father was a five star celebrity

Caleb: Yes, he was

Alexander: My parents spent a fortune here

James: Are you sure we’re not on there? Sorry love, looks like we’ll have to take our service elsewhere *sighs*

Alexander: Look- Caleb? I know I made the reservation. We are long time patrons who wish to spend money here. If you have a problem with that perhaps I should ask to speak to your boss

Caleb: *stiffens* That won’t be necessary- sir, here it is

James: Just like magic

Caleb: If you’ll follow me

The two are escorted to a small table just inside the restaurant.

James: What was that man’s problem

Alexander: I guess he didn’t think we were famous enough

James: Well make sure to leave a big tip so he knows we don’t have hard feelings

Alexander: We don’t have to

James: Maybe we don’t have to but we should. If anything maybe it will make him less judging of future guests that don’t have celebrity status

Diaz: Hello there, what can I get you tonight sirs?

Alexander: Nectar. White I think

James murmurs in agreement and the waiter’s pen begins to mark down the order.

James: You order first love

Alexander: Could I please have the… hmm, the tiger shrimp broth sounds good

Diaz: very good sir

James: Can I have a space taco please

Diaz: Of course sir

The waiter speeds off and Alexander looks at James chuckling.

Alexander: Swanky restaurant and my husband orders a taco

James: Space taco. Maybe it’ll make me fly

Alexander: *laughs* Just don’t go getting abducted, they’ll impregnate a handsome man like you for sure

James: I have been thinking pregnancy thoughts lately

Alexander: *chuckles* Of course. We’ll have a science baby with my hair and your eyes and-

James: Actually…

Alexander: You don’t want a science baby with me?

James: I’d love one, don’t misunderstand me. Raising a mini you would be great but we have to be realistic

Alexander: What do you mean

James: Love, I’m not getting any younger

Alexander: Ridiculous! You’re plenty young

James: You’re sweet but we both know I’m not. Humans here seem to live to about 80

Alexander: Joey would say it’s the watchers fault

James: Yes, he probably would. But Alexander, I want a kid who’s going to remember me

Alexander: But… You’re only 74, you’ve got time left

James: Maybe but not enough time for an infant to get to know me properly. Not enough time for me to be able to pass on my life lessons. Not enough time… for me to know them

Alexander: So what are you saying sweets

James: I’d like to adopt a child or even a teen…

James: What do you think

Alexander: It’s just… something we haven’t discussed before

James: I know, and I’m bringing it up now

Alexander: I mean… I’m not against adoption. Not at all. But… a teen?

James: I know how to handle teens from all my years teaching

Alexander: Yes but *quietly* who says I’ll know what to do

James: You’re wonderful with Milton. You're going to make a great dad

Alexander: Yeah but Milton is my brother. How am I meant to be a dad to someone only a decade younger than me?

James: You won’t be doing it alone, I’m going to be here as long as I can

Alexander: You really want a kid that remembers you huh

James: I do. And I want to leave you with someone that can look out for you to

Alexander: What will I do when you’re gone

James: Pretty sure parenting has a pretty steep learning curve. By the time… well you will know more than nothing

Alexander: What if they don’t respect me

James: I’ll teach them to, we’ll teach them to

Alexander: *sighs* I suppose it can’t hurt to look in to it

James: I’ll win you over eventually

Alexander: *winks* You always do

Previous ... Next

[lostfirefly]

Trembling, crawling across my skin, feeling your cold dead eyes, stealing the life of mine (Ch.1)

This fanfiction story is my present for my friend @yujo-nishimura, whose birthday is today! Sending hugs from Russia and wish you a lot of Crocolove!

Two things inspired me to write this fic: One of my fav songs from which the title is taken and Elena and Damon's dance (from The Vampire Diaries, S1). My 1st attempt to write the story about this character.

Description: Yujo is a young girl whom her father has betrothed to Mr. 3. She and her sister come to the ball, where she meets one of the members of the Cross Guild Corporation Sir Crocodile.

Warnings: No warnings

Words: 1307

Sir Crocodile x OC

The title is taken from "Dance with the Devil" by Breaking Benjamin.

English is not my native language, errors may occur. As always, feel free to share your thoughts :)

Taglist: @gingernut1314

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

✎﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏﹏

"I can't believe we're going to the castle ball tonight!" A blonde girl with curly hair and brown eyes was bouncing happily on the bed.

"Helena, calm down," another girl with green eyes sitting by the dressing table answered her in a calm voice. She brushed her brown hair, occasionally glancing in the mirror. 

"I'm so impatient. We're going to see your fiancé, Mr. 3 again, Yujo! He's so cute!" Helena jumped off the bed, spinning around the bedroom. Her light white dress in small florals fluttered beautifully in the air. 

"I don't know. He doesn't seem like a bad person. Writes nice letters and courts quite non-trivially.", Yujo put her hairbrush down on the table, slowly stood up and walked over to the closet. "Stop spinning around, Helena. Our parents are expecting us for breakfast."

The day passed in preparation for the trip to the ball. After breakfast, Helena and Yujo strolled around the large summer garden and talked about many things. Helena could hardly contain her excitement for the evening, dreaming that she would be able to meet a wealthy young man at the ball.

"And I also heard that either all the members from Cross Guild Corporation are expected to attend, or at least just one. They're some kind of tycoons. I bet they're all handsome and young."

"I've never heard of them." replied Yujo calmly, gently running her hands along the branches of the trees. 

Finally the evening came and Yujo and Helena walked down the steps of their house down to the front entrance. It was a warm summer evening, and a large white carriage drawn by two red horses was waiting for them at the gate.

"Oh, my God! Ball, ball, ball, ball!" Helena ran up the stairs faster than anyone else. 

"You're incorrigible!" Yujo laughed as she watched her sister hop into the carriage. She lifted the hem of her mauve colored chiffon dress and sat down carefully next to her sister.

"What if Mr. 3 isn't coming alone? What if he brings someone cute?"

"Who? Mr. 2 or 4?" Yujo put her arm around her sister's shoulder. "Our parents are already there. For all I know, our father was going to discuss some kind of deal with Mr. Jinbe. And mom probably wants to gossip with everyone. 

It was already dark when they arrived at the gates of a large castle made of gray stone. 

"Here we are, here we are!" Helena jumped out of the carriage and adjusted the hem of her mint-colored dress. "Yujo, where are you?" 

"Coming!", Yujo stepped out of the carriage and looked at her sister. "Let's hurry up or you're going to die of impatience. Just please behave yourself."

They walked into a huge spacious hall. There were tables covered with white and gold tablecloths all around. A large crystal chandelier adorned the ceiling. The ladies were dressed in their best clothes, and the men were all in suits. 

There were whispers, negotiations, and girlish chuckles coming from various directions. 

"Good evening, Yujo, Helena!" a skinny man with a funny hairstyle in the shape of the number three, walked up to Yujo and kissed her hand. "It's nice to see you here. I brought you both some wine.”

“Thank you so much!” they both said in unison. 

"Say, Mr. 3, is it true that the owners of Cross Guild are expected to come?" Helena giggled and sipped her wine a little at a time.

"I don't know about the others, they seemed to have some pressing business, but one is definitely coming." said Mr. 3, looking around the room. "And why are you inquiring, Ms. Helena?"

"No reason..." Helena blushed. 

"I'll leave you ladies alone for a moment," Mr. 3 bowed and stepped aside.

"I heard there's a swordsman there and he's available, and he's pretty cute," Helena poked Yujo lightly in the shoulder. 

Suddenly all voices were briefly silenced and heavy footsteps were heard.

"Ladies, let me introduce the member of the cross guild, Sir Crocodile." Mr. 3 turned back to the girls. "This is Yujo, my fiancée. And this is her little sister Elena."

A tall man with purple hair and dark eyes stood before them. He had a coat thrown over his shoulders and a hook hand.instead of one arm. Yujo was surprised, but tried not to show it.  

“Nice to meet you,” Crocodile kissed the girls’ hands. “So young and so beautiful.”

Helena turned red as a lobster hearing these words. She lightly rubbed her sister’s hand. 

“You see? You see? The hook!” Helena whispered to her sister. Yujo lightly stepped on her sister's foot, silencing her.

“Excuse me, ladies. I have to speak with one man and I’ll come back to you,” Crocodile said calmly. 

“Woooow! He’s so.. So handsome.” Helena was so amazed by Crocodile that she seemed to forget how to breathe. “There seems to be another one there, but I don’t remember who. He must be somewhat unremarkable, since I don’t remember him. I wish I could see the swordsman. Who’s better, that guy with the hook or the swordsman? What do you think?” 

“I have no idea. Aren’t there other people there or what? In this Cross Guild,” Yujo quietly asked her sister, watching Crocodile out of the corner of her eye.

Helena shrugged. “Don’t know. I’ve heard about these three.”

Yujo's father, a plump man of short stature with gray hair approached her with Mr. 3. They had a long discussion about the upcoming wedding ceremony, the guest list and the menu. Yujo found herself looking for Crocodile with her eyes the whole time. 

Finally the start of the ball was announced and Mr. 3 took Yujo's hand and led her to the center of the room. The girls had to stand in one line, the man in another. Yujo found herself in front of Crocodile. The music started. Everyone stepped towards each other, touching one palm to the palm of their partner's hand. Holding their palms side by side, they moved smoothly in a circle. After making a couple of circles, everyone put their second palm to the partner’s palm.

"Sorry you have to settle for a hook," Crocodile said dryly.

“That’s ok,” Yujo said and smiled. 

After making a couple more circles, everyone came closer to each other. The men put one hand on the girls' waists. Crocodile hugged Yujo with a hook. 

Finally the dance ended and everyone bowed to each other. At the same moment, Helena ran up to Yujo.

“God, the chemistry between you just killed me!”

"What?" Yujo asked. She felt as if her mind was clouded during the dance.

"I'm so jealous of you. I want it too! You should ask your Mr. 3 to introduce me to a swordsman!" Helena was almost jumping next to her sister.

“Will you calm down? We are at the ball after all. What if someone is looking at you now, and you are behaving inappropriately,” Yujo laughed, noticing how her sister pouted. Yujo looked around the hall and saw how Crocodile approached her father. They shook hands and started talking about something.

“Yujo, this is Mr. Magellan. He will marry us,” she was pulled out of her thoughts by Mr. 3, who approached her with a tall man, his face resembling a mandrill, with very sharp teeth and thick beard. 

“I have to admit, your bride is amazing, Mister 3. Can’t wait to perform your ceremony,” Magellan said and kissed Yujo’s hand. 

While the all-important potential guests were discussing the upcoming wedding, Yujo was catching more and more that she was thinking about Sir Crocodile. What was it? A charm after the dance? Or is it something else?

[neneru-nowhere]

Finding Love - Thavnair

"Dear Diary

Do the gods still speak with us? Until a short while ago, I was not certain they even truly existed."

Neneru sat on the edge of a fountain, charcoals in hand. Smudges smeared her hands as well as the front of her dress where she'd attempted to wipe them clean. The little sketchbook she would soon mail to her publisher back home was nearly full now--the newest volume detailing her most recent months spent abroad in Ilsabard and now Thavnair.

Kugane had been nice, but she felt as though she were staring at an exhibit. It was as though there were always a pane of glass between her and what she saw, as though she were doomed to only ever be the observer. Thavnair broke down those barriers with the abundant warmth of hospitality.

It didn't stop her from feeling like an observer. Rather, it made her yearn to be part of something all the more. Before the riots in Ul'Dah, before Sister Grimalkin, before the Masaraja pits, Neneru found life and love in her work writing down the stories and traditions she learned in her travels. Books full of folklore, recipes, truisms, history, anything people were willing to provide her. And along all of them, simple sketches in charcoal or full portraits from the little watercolor kit she sometimes carried.

But since those last days back home, there was a hole sitting inside her.

Neneru noticed it first when her magic lost its strength. She attributed it to the loss of her beloved staff during the fighting. Her mistress, F'reya, saw something different.

"You need to find that joy again. You've lost sight of what you're using magic for. What you're doing any of this for. My little dove, you used to love traveling before you came to me."

Neneru stared.

"Am I wrong," 'Reya asked.

"No, sir." The Lalafellin apprentice opened her mouth to protest. "But my studies. My work with the Cross. Don't you need me here?"

"That's your lesson. That's your studies." F'Reya Fahl styled herself as the self-appointed 'Wizard Prince,' including the over-the-top regalia of her alleged station. The Miquote gave a shrug of a single shoulder and smiled down at her charge. "Neru, my little bell pepper, I want you to hit the road."

"If it ever happened that my mother found my journals, she would be broken hearted to know that I haven't believed in the Traders--or any of the Twelve for that matter--since I was a little girl. Nald'thal didn't rescue their city when the calamity came. And all the wealth of Ul'dah did nothing for my family and the other refugees who'd lost our homes all about Thanalan when we were hungry and dying.

When I later learned the nature of such constructs as Primals, well, I suppose that sealed it for me. If the Twelve ever truly existed at all, then surely they were Aetherial constructs of fanatical devotion. No true gods. None who could delivery us from evil, least-wise.

So why do I feel so strange about this encounter?"

"Your technique is lovely."

A shadow fell across her, darkening the page. Looking up, Neneru saw a Ciera woman towering above her. The simple size difference between the two made it seem like the older woman eclipsed the very sun. The lines of her face felt familiar as though she could be related to any of the Ciera Nene held dear. But the blue-green hue of her pale hair marked the tall woman as a clearly unrelated individual.

"May I?" She gestured to the fountain lip beside Neneru.

Nene affected her brightest smile--the one she kept on hand for children, stubborn merchants, and unexpected guests.

"Please. Do." The lalafell scooched to one side to give her new companion room. Nene resumed her sketch, now aware of the audience.

The centerpiece of the two pages laid flat across her lap was a detailed drawing of the bazaar's plaza with quick impressions of locals, hawkers, and guards occupying it. Surrounding the tableau, Neneru filled the pages with rough gestures of clothing and architectural details with notes about their cultural, religious, or political significance.

At this moment, however, her hands roughed in a pair of kneeling children she watched playing on the colorful pavers. She'd been watching the game for all of a half hour--since the children first settled to the task--and as near as she could tell it was a distant cousin of the game Jacks.

"Yes," the Viera hummed to herself. "Very good technical skill. Were you perchance a member of some guild?"

Neneru shook her head. "Self-taught." It was a skill picked up during her years at the Ossuary when she suddenly had ready access to more paper than she'd ever seen in her life. The skill proved especially useful when she'd started submitting her travel journals to the publisher. Not many bought the papers with her articles, but it was a thrill to know even a handful of people had copies of her writing.

"Well, you're quite talented."

Neneru did not take her eyes from the children, but the comment made her forced smile loosen with genuine warmth. "Thank you."

Blowing stray charcoal dust from the pages, she closed the book and set it aside. "I sense a 'but' at the end of your sentence."

If the Viera felt called out, she did not show it. Instead, she beamed. "Well, I complimented the technical skill because that seemed your focus. They are practical drawings. Do you not enjoying what you do?"

All technique and no passion. A familiar refrain these days.

"I do." Neneru gave the comment a diffident shrug.

"I sense a 'but' at the end of your sentence," the Viera returned with a wry smile.

A breath of a laugh escaped Neneru's throat. "Guilty. Mm, I suppose I'm just trying to find myself. I've been through much lately, and though I find naught to be wrong with me, there's no more flame."

"No more flame." The Viera woman mulled over the words. She had no other response, and the two of them sat in companionable silence for a time.

Across from them, the children's game was interrupted by the arrival of a hyuran boy. By appearance he seemed to be the big brother of one of their number. When the two hugged, Neneru caught the Viera woman shining with a joyous look.

As if sensing her questioning look, the Viera leaned in and stage whispered, "Don't these scenes always warm you? The love between two people?"

Neneru only smiled politely in reply.

In retrospect, the way she spoke was strange. As though she were the mentor figure in a parable. I told her nothing of my late sister, but I get the impression she knew. It didn't need to be said. I fear I must sound paranoid. Her question after sounded so much like Mistress 'Reya's. Had I not such familiarity with my teacher's glamours as to be able to spot them, I would swear it were her trying to clumsily teach me some moral lesson.

"Is there aught that you love, Miss Neneru?"

Nene regarded her through hooded eyes. "How did you know my name?"

"Did you not tell me?" The woman considered it for a moment. "I am certain you did."

Nene did not feel so confident, but she corralled her protests. To the original question she said, "Certainly I do. We all do, don't we?"

"Not everyone." The woman's smile turned sad now. "We are full capable of forgetting how to love after hard times, and there is something of it that can cause your humanity to wither. Food becomes tasteless, things that once propelled you forward now provide no impelling fuel, things that came so naturally no longer click into place."

The comment thumped uncomfortably close and Neneru looked away, schooling her face and voice to mirror stillness. "Yes, well, is not everyone undergoing hard times?"

"Of course. Interesting times we live in, are they not? Calamities and scions, and the End of Days. Abominations in Thavnair, famine in Garlemald, riots in Ul'Dah. One could easily lose their way in all this despair."

"But it's all over, is it not?" Neneru hated that the question sounded so uncertain. The riots, at least, were over for the time being.

"Like as not, we'll see more trials ahead. And I think people need to remember how much they need each other, need the things and people they love. The passions that push them forward."

Half turning, Neneru fixed the woman with a searching look. "Do I know you?"

"No, I apologize. I think I just lose hold of my tongue some times. Please forgive me if I'm being over-familiar. Say..."

"Yes?"

"Could you perhaps draw me? I'll pay."

Neneru considered it for a moment.

"Please?"

A warmth like the first gulp of a cup of chain heated her smile and Neneru took up her leather sketchbook once more.

We talked for a time, and she said much the same as Mistress 'Reya and even Miss Trachynwyda about needing to remember what I care about. After, she paid me. A handful of gil coins from a scattering of nations. I made to tear the page out to give to her, but she merely asked to inspect the drawing. She smiled and handed it back to me, leaving without another word. Though the entire encounter has left me with the sense of something larger happening beyond my sight, I did not find the last piece until looking back over my day's work before bed. In the footer of the woman's portrait someone had written "There are many kinds of love."

And beside it, a drawing of two circles, one greater and one lesser. The moons Menphina and Dalamud. Though I counted coins from Thavnair, Kugane, and even Sharlyan, the lion's share came from Ishgard. Didn't the archon Louisoix put one of his monuments to the Twelve in the slopes of Coerthas? I will make a note to visit when I return to the Cross. I'm still unsure what good I am to the organization, but I'll keep trying. People I love are counting on me.

Neneru stuffed her journal back into her travel bag and leaned against the walkway's railing, watching people in the plaza below. Two days now she'd come back, hoping for some glimpse of the mysterious pale-haired Viera. But so far she was disappointed. But her time was up. Mistress 'Reya was due to arrive by Aetheryte soon, and she wanted to clean up and look presentable for her mentor.

[thefisherqueen]

Sherlock Holmes: The hound of the Baskervilles chapter X1 - The man on the tor

Another day, another chapter!

The extract from my private diary which forms the last chapter has brought my narrative up to the 18th of October, a time when these strange events began to move swiftly towards their terrible conclusion. Terrible conclusion? I should emotionally prepare myself for tragedy? Oh damn, I was having such a fun time with all those spooky vibes. Guess I should have expected that at some time actual horror would set in

The first impression left by Mrs. Lyons was one of extreme beauty. Her eyes and hair were of the same rich hazel colour, and her cheeks, though considerably freckled, were flushed with the exquisite bloom of the brunette, the dainty pink which lurks at the heart of the sulphur rose. Admiration was, I repeat, the first impression. But the second was criticism. There was something subtly wrong with the face, some coarseness of expression, some hardness, perhaps, of eye, some looseness of lip which marred its perfect beauty. And these 'failings' in her beauty are an indicator of some failings to her character or morality, I suppose? Don't like that type of storytelling at all. But let's see how this continues before I'm judging the hell out of Doyle

“You knew him, did you not?” “I have already said that I owe a great deal to his kindness. If I am able to support myself it is largely due to the interest which he took in my unhappy situation.” “Did you correspond with him?” The lady looked quickly up with an angry gleam in her hazel eyes. “What is the object of these questions?” she asked sharply. Oh she is fierce, I like her! Come on lady, give Watson a hard time! It's his own fault for not planning what he would say

“The object is to avoid a public scandal. It is better that I should ask them here than that the matter should pass outside our control.” She was silent and her face was still very pale. At last she looked up with something reckless and defiant in her manner. “Well, I'll answer,” she said. “What are your questions?” Watson is damn lucky she's going along with this, considering that he has no actual proof whatsoever to start a scandal

“But if you saw him so seldom and wrote so seldom, how did he know enough about your affairs to be able to help you, as you say that he has done?” She met my difficulty with the utmost readiness. “There were several gentlemen who knew my sad history and united to help me. One was Mr. Stapleton, a neighbour and intimate friend of Sir Charles's. He was exceedingly kind, and it was through him that Sir Charles learned about my affairs.” Another good thing we learn about Stapleton. It really is hard to suspect that man of being up to no good “Did you ever write to Sir Charles asking him to meet you?” I continued. Mrs. Lyons flushed with anger again. “Really, sir, this is a very extraordinary question.” “I am sorry, madam, but I must repeat it.” “Then I answer, certainly not.” “Not on the very day of Sir Charles's death?” Watson's not doing bad in his role as interregator at all

“But why at such an hour?” “Because I had only just learned that he was going to London next day and might be away for months. There were reasons why I could not get there earlier.” “But why a rendezvous in the garden instead of a visit to the house?” “Do you think a woman could go alone at that hour to a bachelor's house?” She has a point here. Doyle is doing wonderful again at adressing the difficulties in women's position “My life has been one incessant persecution from a husband whom I abhor. The law is upon his side, and every day I am faced by the possibility that he may force me to live with him. At the time that I wrote this letter to Sir Charles I had learned that there was a prospect of my regaining my freedom if certain expenses could be met. It meant everything to me—peace of mind, happiness, self-respect—everything. I knew Sir Charles's generosity, and I thought that if he heard the story from my own lips he would help me.” “Then how is it that you did not go?” “Because I received help in the interval from another source.” Holy shit - I thought her husband had just abandoned her, not that he was stalking her. Do we have our main villain here, then? If her husband had somehow learnt about Charles Baskerville's willingness to help his wife get a divorce - that is a proper motive for murder. The question remains: from what other source did she get help?

If this man were inside it I should find out from his own lips, at the point of my revolver if necessary, who he was and why he had dogged us so long. He might slip away from us in the crowd of Regent Street, but it would puzzle him to do so upon the lonely moor. On the other hand, if I should find the hut and its tenant should not be within it I must remain there, however long the vigil, until he returned. Holmes had missed him in London. It would indeed be a triumph for me if I could run him to earth, where my master had failed. Watson's sole motivation: approval of his Holmes (by the way, Watson's making a rather large assumption here that this man and the man in London are the same. I still have a suspicion that the mysterious man on the moor is Holmes himself. It such a Him thing to do, and all the facts so far fit)

Here was luck indeed! And yet I suppressed all appearance of interest. A child! Barrymore had said that our unknown was supplied by a boy. It was on his track, and not upon the convict's, that Frankland had stumbled. If I could get his knowledge it might save me a long and weary hunt. But incredulity and indifference were evidently my strongest cards. “I should say that it was much more likely that it was the son of one of the moorland shepherds taking out his father's dinner.” The least appearance of opposition struck fire out of the old autocrat. His eyes looked malignantly at me, and his gray whiskers bristled like those of an angry cat. Watson finally discovers his acting talent! The key to unlock is in getting people angry xD

I meekly answered that I had spoken without knowing all the facts. My submission pleased him and led him to further confidences. No so surprising: that mr. 'here to be used' and 'he's my master' Watson is good at being submissive But down beneath me in a cleft of the hills there was a circle of the old stone huts, and in the middle of them there was one which retained sufficient roof to act as a screen against the weather. My heart leaped within me as I saw it. This must be the burrow where the stranger lurked. At last my foot was on the threshold of his hiding place—his secret was within my grasp. *is just as excited as Watson is* “It is a lovely evening, my dear Watson,” said a well-known voice. “I really think that you will be more comfortable outside than in.” It IS Holmes!!!! I knew it!!!! Welcome back, my silly detective, missed you :)

[littleelephanty]

I want to ask you, what rules do you have with your dom. Do you have any suggestions for rules, that I could use with my sub? We are together since two and a half year, it was more a vanilla thing, but a few weeks ago, she showed me her tumblr and asked, if I´m into kink. I am really interested and it turns me on, but I don´t know where to start the rules and anything... (I´m also a women, if this matters)

Hi, first of all congratulations on having this conversation and that it went so well! I know it's not always easy to share new kinks and passions with your partner, or to listen to your partner when they tell you about something they really want to try. We're also in a romantic partnership, so our rules aren't such a high priority at the moment (and because I've had a lot on my plate with my job and university). But I still have a few ideas (some of them we do, some of them we used to do and some of them I know from other people who live out kink):

Good morning ritual (of course it depends a lot on whether you live together or it's more online): You could introduce the rule that there has to be a good morning message or a good morning picture or that Sub kneels next to the bed after waking up and waits for instructions from the Dom, also something like making coffee or breakfast or an inspection pose could be part of it

No masturbation without permission (and certainly no orgasm)

No sweets, no coffee, no alcohol… without permission (just having to ask subspaces you a lot and the dom has a lot of control)

Use titles: I'm not sure if I used the right word, but a rule about how the sub must address the Dom is very effective. Here it can vary from Mommy/Daddy, Mistress, Goddess, Sir/Lady/Madam, depending on your preference.

Whenever dom comes home, sub must stand up and kiss dom's feet or perform some other ritual like kneeling or taking off dom's jacket etc.

Good evening rituals: Either a message or a certain pose… depending on how it fits

no swearing

Every evening write a diary entry to the Dom about the day, what you experienced, how the relationship and interaction with the Dom was etc.

pet names for the sub

You can also introduce a rule that you can only go to the toilet at certain times or that you always have to ask beforehand

Self-care rules such as the amount of water you have to drink or doing sports or having a routine can also be part of the rules

There are actually no limits to what rules you want to set. Talk to each other, find out which areas of life the sub of the dom can/may/should have control over (some also have the rule that no money may be spent without asking first, etc., but I find that kind of difficult) No matter how you do it: have fun and talk to each other a lot! You will realize that there is a lot to discover!

[stalkersdiary]

Hiiii Sir! I have committed SO MANY SINFUL ACTS because of you. UwU When I saw your most recent post I screamed. YOURE SO HOT.

Congrats on 100 followers! To celebrate I got some of my favorite clips of your voice from streams, that podcast you were a guest on, and even our little phone call and I was wondering if you wanted to check it out. <3 Love youuuu!

Now for the JUICY questions I really wanted to ask. You mentioned a while ago that you had a partner who was "worse that you were" so I have to like ask now what extreme things have you done before for/because of love? OH AND you mentioned you dont have a lot of friends because your awkward and shy and never leave the house and stuff. WOULD YOU ACCEPT RANDOM DMS? CAUSE I WANNA TALK TO YOU MORE AND I FEEL LIKE OTHERS WOULD TOO!

- JATTA Your loyal fuck toy <3 PS.

Solid Warning for anyone reading. Part of this is going to be honest. A little too honest. Hello again Mocha. I start to get used to you and then you break out the term "Loyal fuck toy" and I have to do a double take. Hahaha. To answer all of this, I'll do so in order. I was never really here for the followers or likes but I am happy to entertain and help people feel understood. As for the audios, I just listened to which ones you posted and I'm trying so hard not to laugh. I sound so gross over the phone. Hahaha I'm glad you put up with me during my streams. ^^ I'm amused that people still think I sound like Corpse or Riot. Nat, I don't get a he sounds so nasal in comparison to me but any comparisons are funny. As for the "Juicy questions" I have a few interesting answers you maybe didn't expect. For legal reasons, this is a fictional blog by a "yandere", but you and I both know the truth. We both know that a yandere isn't real even if the concept is. I've committed serious crimes for many reasons aside from love, like self defense, and a few of my hobbies. Many of which could be worse but are extreme to most people. Aggravated battery, aggravated assault, and even non-aggravated Arson. Felonies are linked to my memories but nothing is linked to my name as I was never caught. It's a bit funny. Oh and let's not forget that some thing's titles are a little "tricky..." I have class 1 and f1 violations, first and second degree, and petty theft all hidden in my past. I don't know the laws well enough to know which one is which anymore. I don't do anything these days as I'm not... where I used to be. However the memories are very strong and I know what I used to be capable of... I can't do what I used to because I'm not the person I used to be and I'm glad I'm not. Don't worry, it was so long ago and so unimportant to everyone related to the incidents that there is no way I'm gonna be in trouble now. ^^ As for the possibility of DMing me, go for it! I still don't really have friends but I would love to talk to someone. Anyone can DM me. I just hope they know what they're getting into as I tend to be very awkward and I overthink a lot. I tend to not talk first because I assume everyone has already gotten tired of me. On a funny note, as I was writing this a friend looked over and asked me if I would put the Whump tag and now I have another thing I need someone to explain to me because I have never heard her laugh this hard. Oh dear. Hahaha Thank you for opening the Stalker's Diary.

[lenora-reyes]

Lenora Reyes’s Not-So-Secret Diary, Entry 6: In the Storm's Wake of the Dragon Isles [Warcraft Conquest Intro - Tempest’s Fury]

April 21, 632 K.C.

Dear Diary,

Our arrival to the Dragon Isles was not so smooth. The storms themselves responded to the cry of the protodrakes here. If I knew I was going against the weather itself, I might have re-considered teachings as a shaman or something. But alas, I am a squire that has a reckless death wish. Maybe I'm picking something up from Sir Adamar and that curse of his. Don't tell him I said that.

But the storms themselves seemed to give birth to these creatures. Forging their scales of harden rock, fire, and lightning! It was so chaotic that even the air support was brought from the sky into the ground! So many of us were injured in just the first day of fighting. I think father would have been impressed with how unscathed I was, but he would have made some sort of fuss over the bite from a drake. However, the plus side is... I've made some new friends here. I'm still wary about the number of Dracthyr and Dragons, but seems were on a pretty even battlefield.

I can't write much longer today as we will be departing from camp in a few hours once everyone starts to wake up. After cleaning up the blood and mud, and fixing up some of Yelena's armor - I believe I can fulfill Lady Rosemarri's request to dispense justice to Sir Adamar. And I've thought of the perfect excuse too! I saw him kick a whelp near the end of our last battle, and I can just say a whelp went to get vengeance on his boots by regurgitating muck into them. I even found some scales in the grass here to convince him if he doesn't believe me! I'm just hoping I wasn't spotted by Sir Jonathan or anyone else. Best to make myself sparse at camp before he awakens...

@theborderlandcoalition

[consistantly-changing]

[Image descriptions in order: a series of images that look like a slideshow. The first one is bright red with large white text which says "If I so much as catch a WHISPER that people are trying to monetize FanFiction on AO3".

At the bottom, there is small text which says "A non-selective plan for dealing with the resurgence of blatant Fic Commissions on AO3, inspired by the campus Tik-Tok".]

[The rest of the images are white with black text, which have a title followed by a bullet point list. They say:

If I see Blatant Commissions:

(Capitalized) I will report you

(Capitalized) I will report your ass

(Capitalized) I literally will not give it a second thought, i will just smash that report button

(Capitalized) I didn't survive the transition from LJ, and the purge of ff.net just to see people make ao3's job even harder than it has to be

On the right side of the slide, there is a PNG of a red button.]

[But fanartists...

It's different

(Capitalized) I know, I know

It's technically the same - it's just different

On the right is the meme of Ben Affleck looking tired, smoking a cigarette out of a window with a bottle of alcohol beside him]

[Why you so mad?

Copyright law violation

Copyright law violation = slippery slope to getting sued by OC's

Free Fanfic is made safe by the 'Fair Use' clause – which says that it's okay to transform copyrighted property because no money is being made off of it

When you charge/commission – you lose your ONE defence]

[Learn your history

Fic writers got sued in the not too distant past

Some of them were sued very successfully and made to pay reparations along with their cease and desist orders

The name 'Anne Rice' still gives old fic writers flashbacks

Historically Fic writers have been reminded, viciously, about whose sandpit we play in and on what terms (Not Ours)]

[(Toggle case) but I never said I own the characters

There are several screenshots of disclaimers that authors put on their works, which say:

Crowley, The Book of the Law, 57. Disclaimer: I don't own anything here, except the writing. No profit is intended except the sheer joy I get out of constructing this story.

JK Rowling owns Harry Potter. Fasa games owns Earthdawn.

Disclaimer: Everything belongs to J.K. Rowling and I make absolutely no money with this FF.

Disclaimer: Aragorn is mine! Allllll mine, my precious yessss..... (Just kidding, he belongs to Tolkien, who's probably spinning in his grave at this very moment...)

All characters belong to George Lucas and Lucasfilm Ltd., yadda, yadda, yadda...

Disclaimer: The raven belongs to E.A. Poe. I'm just borrowing the hateful creature for a little bit, okay?

Author's Notes: Sherlock Holmes and all related characters are original creations of the genius of Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. Original characters (meaning mine) will be noted. This fic takes place somewhere between A Scandal in Bohemia and Holmes's retirement. Please R/R.

Disclaimer: The dear boys belong to Victor Hugo, may he rest in peace and not be disturbed by whatever I do with (or to) them. The first names of Marcelin, Francois, and Etienne were Manon Goutal's brilliant idea. Alexandre and Laurent were mine. Claudette Prouvaire, Claude to her friends, is entirely a creation of my own mind (be afraid: oP). I'm not making money off this, nor do I want to. I have nothing. Have mercy on me. Archivists: Feel free to post this on your site, just let me know

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters and/or plotlines and/or dialogue of Jane Austen's Pride and Prejudice nor Henry Fielding's Tom Jones. Duh.

Disclaimer: The Vampire Diaries does not belong to me. New characters, are mine.

-- All the usual disclaimers apply -- I own nothing -- just borrowing these guys for a while --

Learn your history, it's only in the last few years that we haven't had to put disclaimers on EVERYTHING because AO3 protects us]

[but, but, I didn't know I can't charge...

(capitalized) read the terms of service

(Sub bulletted list): "You agree not to make available any unsolicited or unauthorized advertising (defined as solicitations for direct or indirect commercial advantage" [AO3 TOS Section I, D]

"Promotion of commercial products or activities is not allowed." [AO3 TOS, Section IV, B]

"Unsolicited commercial activity is not permitted on the Archive.” [AO3 TOS, Section IV B]

(capitalized) it's literally in the terms of service use your eyeballs

Below is clip art of cartoon eyes that are wide open.]

[(Capitalized) In conclusion

(Capitalized) don't fucking charge for fic

(Capitalized) don't put on ao3 that you're charging for fic

(Capitalized) don't link your ko-fi, patreon, paypal, on ao3

(Capitalized) just don't fucking do it

(Capitalized) thank you]

a non-selective plan for the resurgence of fic commissions

[alexiious]

● S1 E1 Rent Problem

*Justin writing he's diary* "Day 60 living with this...idiot, *looking at him watching TV from sofa* he's unbearable to live with, he's snored so much that we almost got evicted, he was screaming at he's new PC that he paid from he's daddy's money, bragging about how he's smarter them me from some TV show we watched..

G: Hey..what are you writing..on??

J: None of ur business dude, go...and watch ur little show...

*intro song starts playing*

G: Really?? Well I wanna see it dude..

J: Well...fuck off dude...it's my diary...get ur own..

*fighting over the diary, and let diary go*

J: Thank.. you...*whispers* brat..

G: What did u say??

J: Oh. .nothing good...it's just... this was the last straw...

G: What did I do?

J: What?..What did u do?? *laughs out of addusity to say*

J: Well dear "roomate" youv been nothing but pain in the ass!!...

J: Your lucky, your mommy and daddy *says mockingly* have enough money for us..

G: yeah...I forgot to tell u that my parents..did...block my bank account..

J: What??...

*knocks, opens up the door, it was landlord*

N: Hi my is, Nathan *shakes Jamess hand*.. pleaser to meet u *shakes Georges hand*... I'm new here, my previous colleague told me you two had money for rent.. and I heard that yall paid rent last month so.. it will be about 200$

J: Soo...about that...Mr Nathan...my friend had money...but...he...hes parents...blocked he's credit card...

*Nathan was suprised*

N: oh...really??... Aha.. *tries to cope*

J: were....terribly sorry sir...

J: it's he's fault...

*points at him*

G: *gasp* it's not my fault...my parents wants to give me...real job.. for poor people..

J: I'm sorry what did u say??

N: guys...if u both dont get job to pay this rent. .yall gonna be evicted...just like thouse two gay couple...who got evicted becouse..they didn't pay rent...understood?? *says it seriously*

J: yes sir..

G: Whatever dude...

N: great...good luck.. *says it with smile*

J: ok..George like it or not were gonna get a job...ik how you are "allergic" to poor people work.. but I don't care!! You will do it and you will like it!!

G: *grounts* fine!!

*James keeps writing* "Now..I have to work with this brat...God have mercy on my soul.. *closes the book*

*both od them goes to Walmart on a interview*

*stands infront of door*

J: so remember..I will do most of talking and u... *looking at him scraching hes ass*

just knod... *whispers* dear god..

*knocks on door*

Boss: come in..

*comes in*

Boss: Well hello there my name is Kenny *shakes both of they're hands* ...I'm ur menager or boss.. *says it with smile*

J: hello..my name is James.. were here to apply to job..

G: *cough* no shit *cough*

J: *kicks him slightly*

K: oh..are u ok George?

J: Oh no..its ok...it's just a cough..

K: oh..ok.. so I'm gonna ask u few questions to see what can u to do..

*he's finding the papers*

*George whispers* dude..this guy is so lame..

*James whispers back* dude...shut up..

K: here.. found it..here are your papers and you two can work..

*gives them papers*

*they done the papers*

K: all good now watch this video in case something happenes to you to..

*shows the man who worked on forklift and big metal pipes crushes on him*

*Some random man: "Hey new worker were glad your working here with us...just ignore people with dipers, grown unemployed adults who like to joke around.. and makes our life worse... and old women who are yelling at the workers for some random reason... but other then that ur good to go..

*video ended*

K: soo on that note..welcome to Walmart..

*both of them are on shock*

J: dear god...did u seen that guy...throw shit at worker?? *cringed in discust*

G: aha.. *got distracted*

G: *looks at other femail workers*

Also him: maybe this place isnt so much bad..

J: are u insane...did u seen shit that iv seen?? Jesus Christ... were gonna work here..for a rent and thats it..

G: like dude...we have pretty lady's

J: Dude...we came here to work...not date random women..

G: ew oh yeah...don't remind me..

*few hours later*

J: Dude did u throw the trash out..

G: uhh..no u do it...if u want..

J: Well.. I'm cleaning the damn shop...so can u please do it...

G: ew..that's ur job..I'm not touching that dirty thing... I have standards...

J: dude!! *calms down* I don't have time can u please... just throw the fucking trash bag inside fucking trash.

K: what's going on here!?

J: oh nothing George..

*George throws the trash*

K: you see...hes doing he's work.. and u?

J: I will sir..

J: Dude...u almost got me in trouble...

G: it's just trolling...

*James got pissed off*

*next day during the shift*

*George goes smoking outside*

J: are u gonna help me dude??

G: soon... *exhale the smoke*

*20 minutes later*

G: *still smokes*

J: Dude get inside and help me...

G: *sighs* fine!!

J: there is one old lady whos just in middle of a store screaming in the sky..I assume god...about how prices are high or some shit...

G: ahhh...ur talking to much...ur point??

*James slightly pissed off* well Kenny told me that u and i have to remove her...

G: ahh.. fine...

Some old lady: *still sits*

J: lady could u please get up??

Old lady: Excuse me...my name is Karen and im protesting about your high fucking prices

J: *sigh* Dude where are u??

*George left*

*looks like hes fed up with life*

*removes her while she's screaming*

*goes to boss*

J: boss...I have to say something...to complain about my colleague...

K: But why...hes done everything he's been told...hes thrown a trash..hes removed the goods from shelfs... and u did bearly...did anything...

J: me?? But I... *gets speechless*

*James got fed up and goes to the bar*

*goes to the bar*

J: *gets a drink* aahh...what a day..

S: Hey dude... how was ur day??

J: dont ask... and hey thanks for the money yesterday... it would be plenty enough for rent and couple of drinks...just don't tell...you know who.

S: No worries dude...

J: and I'll get u money when my paycheck arrives that is if it arrives...

S: No problem... and why wouldn't it...

*just before Steven would've finished the sentence George arrives*

G: Hey there u are..

J: you!! Becouse of u i almost lost a job...

G: cmon...I was trolling...it's a joke...

J: fuck u!!

G: aha... give me a drink also..

Also George: you know whats the issue dude.. your taking everything to seriously..

G: oh...I'm soory i forgot u get money from ur mommy and daddy *gets a drink* im almost lost my job...because of u and ur complaining about me taking things seriously..

G: ahh...that's what i was talking about...to serious... *gets a drink*

J: Well im sorry...Mr Fun guy . *laughs* i said Fun Guy!! *hes drunk*

G: *laughs also* u...did it dude...u made a joke... *he's also drunk*

J: Hey dont change the subject...Mr Fun *hick up* guy.. but life isnt always fun...

G: Haha...oh god..

J: what??.

G: I...think im gonna puke..

J: here is Steffanny...

G: ahh..where??

J: Just kidding.. haha

G: u jerk... *pukes*

S: Oh god...not here.. on floor..

G: oh im sorry Steven..where would i else puke...

*next day they're woken up on Georges bed*

G: ahh...my head... uhh..

G: let me ask u something...

J: What?? Aahh... my head..

G: where did we get the money for that bar??

J: ohh...well i might have some laying around..

G: *shocked* and u were...wow!!

J: look...the thing is...Steven...gave me yesterday... becouse i was afraid i would be fired...and i didnt wanna tell u...bc u were gonna spend it on some dumb shit...ok.. sorry... aahh

*they were fighting until Nathan came in*

N: Hey guys...it's paying day..

*shows them money*

N: Thank you boys...nice working with u .

*outro song sounds playing*

[plumblossomcafe]

Ch.32: A Herald Without Adherents

Dainsleif: So we meet again, a little sooner than I had expected.

Paimon: Hey, it's Dain!

Dainsleif: Judging by both of your expressions, it seems you guys just experienced something quite strange. Could it be that you encountered an Abyss Herald in those ruins?

Paimon: Huh!? How did you know that?

Dainsleif: I've been on the Abyss Herald's trail. I didn't expect to find you here as well.

Y/n: Actually, the Abyss Herald wasn't all we encountered... There was something even stranger than the Abyss Herald in the ruins.

Y/n tells Dain about the strange statue and deceased thief while using her vision to help visualize what happened...

Dainsleif: An inverted Statue of The Seven... holding Abyssal power in its hands? No, I have never seen such a thing during my time fighting the Abyss... though I have had my suspicions. Tell me the rest of what happened in there. So you escaped the ruin depths filled with Abyssal power, and then?

Paimon: And then, as we got close to the exit, an Abyss Herald suddenly appeared and blocked our way. We fought a big battle with that thing. Maybe it hasn't gotten too far yet...

Dainsleif: Yes, this is a rare opportunity indeed. Come, let's catch up to it.

Y/n: Yes, sir!

Paimon: Let's go! A rare opportunity! With Dain helping out, maybe we'll be able to solve more mysteries about the Abyss!

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After heading to some ruins and defeating the monsters and ruin guard

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Paimon: Those Abyss Mages just now... were they trying to ambush us?

Dainsleif: No, they were just digging through these abandoned Ruin Guards looking for something of value.

Paimon: Oh, is that so... The Traveler here seems to like doing that a lot, too... Looking for Chaos Devices, Chaos Circuits... You know, that kinda stuff.

Aether: Abyss Mages probably weren't looking for stuff like that...

Dainsleif: They wouldn't be searching for such ordinary objects. In fact, I was nearby investigating precisely because Abyss Mages often come out from that ruin to explore. They seem to be searching the remains of Ruin Guards for a certain valuable object to take back to the ruins. However, they look disappointed, so it would seem they haven't found it yet...

Paimon: Well then, why didn't you grab one of them just now and ask what they were up to?

Aether: Yeah, Master Diluc's done that before... You should be rougher with them.

Y/n: Isn't there a more I don't know, gentle way?

Dainsleif: I certainly don't mean to be merciful towards these monsters of the Abyss... But I have a feeling that their plan with this object is of major importance to the entire Abyss Order. One can not discover the truth behind it through interrogation. Or rather, these Abyss Mages likely fear something else much more than they do a painful interrogation...

Y/n: Fear? Hmm, could it be something related to what we saw in the ruins? *writing all the clues down in her diary*

Paimon: Uhh... Paimon is getting goosebumps thinking about all this!

Dainsleif: Alright, we shouldn't waste too much time here. Let's continue our search.

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After repeating the same thing at the other ruins

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Paimon: Wow... Besides the Abyss Order, Ruin Guards sure are active around here... Seems wherever we find an Abyss Mage hideout, there's often a bunch of Ruin Guards roaming around, too. Is that just a coincidence, or...?

Dainsleif: There are no coincidences in the world. Everything is the fruit of seeds planted long ago. Just like both of your appearances in that tavern... Time is just waiting for those seeds to sprout.

Aether: But we only heard about you by chance... I don't really understand...

Dainsleif: Forget it. Just some needless musings. The connection between the Abyss Order and the Ruin Guards is by no means incidental. Rather, they are both branches that have grown out and up from the same roots below.

Paimon: "Branches"? "Roots"? What do you mean exactly?

Dainsleif: Both originate from an ancient nation that was destroyed 500 years ago — Khaenri'ah.

Paimon: Huh? Khaenri'ah!? Really!? The Abyss Order and Ruin Guards are left over from after the destruction of that nation!? Oh... Speaking of Khaenri'ah, that's really a super ancient name...

Y/n: Khaenri'ah?

Paimon: Oh, right. As your guide, Paimon should explain a bit here. A long time ago, the nation of Khaenri'ah was...

Aether: I know about Khaenri'ah...

Paimon: ...Huh?

Aether: Because I have memories of Khaenri'ah.

Paimon: You have memories of being there? But that nation was destroyed 500 years ago...

Dainsleif: ... Is that so? Well, everyone has their secrets. You did not pry into mine, so I shall not pry into yours... But if you would like to tell me, I will listen... So, the Khaenri'ah you saw, what was it like?

Aether: "Well, I can't hide it from him any longer...Dain and Khaenri'ah... It's worth a shot. The person who woke me up... And that sea of flames..."

Aether tells Dain about the sea of flames they saw 500 years ago and that god they encountered...

Paimon: So that's the complete story, huh... Paimon thought that you ran into that unknown god first...

Dainsleif: Hmm... I see... So your first memory after coming into this world was being awoken by your sister from within that meteorite...

Paimon: It seems your sister woke up first, but the question is, how long before you...

Dainsleif: And then your sister told you that the destruction of Khaenri'ah plunged the whole world into chaos and that you two should leave this world called Teyvat?

Paimon: "The destruction of Khaenri'ah"? She said that?

Aether: Correct. That's what I heard at the time.

Dainsleif: That destruction you witnessed, that's... history from 500 years ago. It seems the first time you awoke in this world was indeed during that period.

Paimon: Huh... So your sister must have understood this world better than you did because she woke up first.

Dainsleif: And it was shortly after that that you encountered an unknown god who blocked your path, so you couldn't escape...

Paimon: Oh, Paimon knows this part really well.

Dainsleif: ...I understand. When you awoke at that time and hurriedly tried to leave for another world, you didn't know anything about Khaenri'ah. But now, since you have come to gain some understanding of Teyvat, you are able to guess that the war you witnessed all those years ago must be the war that ended Khaenri'ah... Am I right?

Paimon: Ah! If that's the case, you must've been flipping through all sorts of books during our adventure these past few months. Before going to Mondstadt, you had just looked at some vague materials. Later, we managed to gather a whole bunch of old books from all around Mondstadt and Liyue, but you told Paimon they were useless... So the whole time, you were just trying to learn more about Khaenri'ah so you could find your sister?

Aether: It's the second most promising lead after looking for The Seven. Despite only having a place name to go on.

Paimon: Oh yeah... You can travel around the seven nations to find The Seven, but where can you go to find a nation that was destroyed 500 years ago...?

Dainsleif: I probably know more about Khaenri'ah than both of you. Khaenri'ah was a nation without a god — not because it had a god that died or abandoned them, but because it never had a god to begin with. It was a powerful nation, built purely by humans, an unprecedented flourishing and glorious civilization — it was the pride of humankind.

Paimon: A nation... without a god...?

Dainsleif: Later events unfolded just as you remember — it was all destroyed... by gods.

Paimon: You mean that...

Dainsleif: 500 years ago, the gods descended upon the world and brought desolation to Khaenri'ah. The "pride of humankind" was uprooted and crushed, like a weed removed from the garden of the gods "from what I also remember I heard a faint sound of a baby crying admist the chaos but from what I also remember, that during that time,a child wasn't even born yet"...

Paimon: How could that be...? The history books don't say anything about that...

Aether: That's horrible... What a dangerous world... I need to hurry up and find my sister.

Dainsleif: Yes. Well, continuing to discuss the past now will only dampen our spirits.

Aether: "But, the next time I see Venti or Zhongli... I need to hear what explanation the gods have for their actions."

Y/n: *feels her breath hitch and fall to her knees*

Aether/Dainsleif: !?!

Paimon: Y/n!!! What's wrong!?! Why are you crying all of a sudden!?!

Y/n: I was born 500 years ago...

Paimon: What!?!

Aether: That means that the dream you claimed to sometimes have was in reality...

Dainsleif: An actual memory of when you were a baby when you were first brought into this world

Y/n: *sniffling* The red sky and the destroyed land were in reality Khaenri'ah when it was destroyed...why... why didn't dad or papa tell me anything?... Why did they keep this from me... until I had to find out on my own...

Paimon/Aether/Dainsleif: "They kept the truth from her this entire time"

Dainsleif: Let's give her some time to calm down..

After some time

Aether: Feeling better?

Y/n: *wiped her remaining tear away* Yeah... *gets up*

Dainsleif: Let's keep moving. I will tell you more of what you want to know as we continue our search. After all, Y/n deserves to know the truth after being kept away from it for too long.

Y/n: Thanks...

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Paimon: Over there! It's more Ruin Guards and Abyss Mages. Dain was just saying how these ancient machines are from Khaenri'ah... So... did Khaenri'ah have a lot of ruins that needed to be guarded?

Dainsleif: No. "Ruin Guard" is the name modern people have given these machines. No one called them that 500 years ago. These "Ruin Guards" were known as "Field Tillers" by the people of Khaenri'ah.

Paimon: "Field Tillers"? What a strange name.

Aether: So what's with the lethal weapons...?

Dainsleif: It's not like you think. "Field Tiller" was just a code name. The people of Khaenri'ah liked to give code names to their weapons. "The land is not to be tilled with farming tools, but rather to be fought for with steel and blood." —This is how the "Field Tiller" came about.

Paimon: "Fought for with steel and blood"? Well, that's an interesting way of understanding "tilling."... Paimon doesn't think it's a very positive interpretation.

Dainsleif: ... After the destruction of Khaenri'ah, these masterless "Field Tillers" went completely out of control. They wandered aimlessly over the centuries, gradually spreading to every corner of Teyvat. Perhaps resonating with the sorrow of other civilizations lost to time, they found their way to various ruins across the land, where they lie dormant.

Paimon: That sounds... so sad...

Y/n: Wandering aimlessly for 500 years, how sad...

Dainsleif: Once you understand more, those details won't mean much to you. But no matter their past, all that remains of them now is the danger they pose... so destroy them all.

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Upon defeating more Abyss Mages, a certain one dropped something once it was defeated

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Paimon: Huh? This Abyss Mage dropped a talisman...

Y/n: Could it be a communication of some kind?

Dainsleif: Hmm, this talisman seems connected to the Abyss Herald. But why would an Abyss Mage be carrying it...? Perhaps it really does contain information about their operation.

Paimon: But, Paimon can't read the writing on it... *gasp* Is that the script of Khaenri'ah?

Dainsleif: "...Engulf the faith of the enemy in flame, and bring glory to Her Highness, the Princess..."

Paimon: Wha—!? Is that what it says?

Dainsleif: "...'Loom of Fate,' initial operation." They... the Abyss seem to be carrying out a large operation. The keyword here is "Loom of Fate." It seems like they are still launching the operation, or rather, are still conducting preliminary tests...

Paimon: "Loom of Fate"? What's that? Is it literally a... fate-weaving machine?

Y/n: The Abyss Mage came from those ruins... Is it related to the inverted statue? *writing down more clues*

Paimon: From the horrible feeling Paimon's been getting, those eerie ruins are super likely to be related to this fate-weaving operation. So Dain, what message does this talisman contain?

Dainsleif: I'm reading it now... Hmm... An ambitious operation, but some parts are difficult to understand.

Paimon: How so?

Dainsleif: In short, the first phase of the plan is related to Osial, Overlord of the Vortex.

Paimon: The Overlord of the Vortex!? You mean that god in the ocean?

Aether: We weren't able to destroy it last time... It was just crushed by the Jade Chamber...

Paimon: What do they want with Osial? Ohh...

Aether: Could it be the same as with Dvalin?

Y/n: Probably, if you think about it, the Abyss Order was the one that corrupted and manipulated Dvalin.

Dainsleif: I know both of your past heroics regarding Dvalin, and I also know of the Abyss Order's role in the Stormterror incident. Though you guys may not have been aware of it at the time, you were thwarting an Abyss Order operation similar to this one.

Y/n: What?

Paimon: Last time, it was Venti's old friend. This time, it was a huge ancient god... The Abyss Order keeps setting their sights higher and higher. Will the Abyss Order use their lies and dark magic to corrupt Osial, just as they did Dvalin?

Dainsleif: No... From the contents of the talisman, this operation goes one step further. They won't just corrupt Osial's mind. They also plan to use the ancient technology behind the "Field Tillers" to completely transform Osial's body.

Paimon: Is... that even possible? So wait, the Abyss Order wants to make some sort of... Cybernetic Squid

Aether: Sounds about right.

Dainsleif: Very few people today truly understand the civilization of Khaenri'ah, though of course, the accuracy of that understanding itself is difficult to judge. Only the Abyss Order has consistently sought out the remnants of Khaenri'ah. Despite being far from human, they seek out this lost human civilization quite persistently. The talisman's message states that they will use "the Defiled Statue" as a base, attaching Osial's limbs to construct a mechanized god. And the new core that shall replace the orb usually held by the Statue of The Seven... is the eye of the very first Field Tiller.

Paimon: "The eye of the very first Field Tiller"? ... Ohh, Paimon gets it! All those Abyss Mages are looking for this special eye, right?

Dainsleif: It would seem so.

Y/n: They haven't found it yet. We still have time. Let's find it before they do.

Paimon: This whole thing keeps getting more complicated, but basically, it all has to do with that eerie Statue of The Seven we saw, right?

Dainsleif: Yes. According to the talisman, the eye should be placed in the hands of the Defiled Statue... Thereby imbuing the newly born god with the power to "topple the divine thrones of Celestia."

Aether: "Celestia... Topple the divine thrones..."

Paimon: Oh boy... The Abyss Order sure isn't holding back with this plan. Hmm. Since no one knows where the first Field Tiller is, how about we take the information about the statue as the starting point for our investigation?

Aether: Y/n, does that statue look familiar to you?

Y/n: That statue... It looked like the Anemo Archon....... Should we ask the Church of Favonius about it?

Paimon: Yeah, that Tone-Deaf Bard is too difficult to track down anyway. Let's go to the cathedral first and ask around. Maybe we'll learn something.

Dainsleif: The Cathedral... Hmph.

Paimon: Huh? What's the matter, Dain?

Dainsleif: Nothing. Let's get moving.

Y/n: "Something is off about him like he is hiding something"

[spoonieverse]

Linn's Lore: Goals, Dreams, and Spoonie Strength

Can you believe we’re already a week deep into 2024? I hope this first Sunday gave you a gentle start and that you’re ready for some söndagsmys. See, I’d like to invite you to one of my favourite corners of this world. Isn’t it beautiful here under my tree? Sir Bear made this space for me so I would have a place to contemplate our stories, reflect on whatever life throws our way, and enjoy the simple joys of being. 

I like to sit here and work on something I call Linn's Lore. It’s a diary of sorts, but nothing like the Ship’s Log I keep as the Captain of the Resilience. No, my Lorebook is personal, sometimes even private, and it’s where I can be myself and talk about my life as a spoonie author. Where I can dream, plan, and deep-dive into as many rabbit holes as I like in search of inspiration and knowledge. Today, I’ve got a nice pot of tea and a gorgeous apple cake, and I was thinking we could share them and have a chat about new beginnings, New Year’s resolutions, and the delicate universe we have created here in the space between dreams and reality.

New Year’s resolutions – they’re a bit like a double-edged sword, aren’t they? One side whispers, nay sings, of new beginnings and transformation. The other speaks, rather bluntly, of past failures and resolutions unfulfilled. As someone living with the daily complexities of chronic illness, I've learned to view resolutions not as rigid goals, but as my North Star, gently illuminating a path that's kind to both my aspirations and realities. And I’ve also taught myself that resolutions don’t have to be chores. You can add as many fun and uplifting things as you like - it’s your list!

This year, after a few years of only picking a single goal, I've boldly set my sights on a whole constellation of them. Well, why the heck not, I thought to myself when I sat here chewing the back of my pen. I’ve had the same goal for so long and now that things are beginning to pick up speed I feel like it’s sink-or-swim time. Some of my goals are private, but of the ones I can share, each one is shining its own light on us. In 2024, my goals are to:

Double My Writer's Income: This is a challenge, for sure, and it may sound like a shallow one at that, but hear me out. I’ve not been able to talk about this before, and I’m not going into detail today, but the long and short of it is that 2023 was the first year I made a small sum of money in book royalties. My primary goal is for our stories to reach more hearts and minds, but my secondary goal is to build something that can help me sustain an independent lifestyle as a disabled author. I am frugal and I don’t need much, so I believe this is a SMART goal.

Release 12 New Books: Some stories are waiting to be told, others are waiting to be edited, and I have been a pretty ynklig pet for most of 2023. This year something’s gotta give and I have to believe we will find a way out of here. I write with my Sir Bear. All my stories are his and all his stories are mine. In this world we have created we are one. Between us, 12 books (four of mine, four of his, and four from the Libertalia pipeline) should not be an unreasonable goal, but it all hinges on goal number 3.

Move Into a New Home: The Resilience is my spiritual home, and my heart has found a home in a sweet and very protective Sea Bear. However, as much as I love me ship and me Quartermaster, I do need a place to stay on this peculiar island that has been my home for the past two decades. This is yet another topic I’ve not been able to talk about, but you better believe I’m like a pressure cooker inside and shit wants out.

Focus on Health and Well-being: I need to see a dentist, I need new glasses, and I need to continue the work to find out what’s going on in my stomach. I need to get my meds sorted, and I really need to find a way to get some fresh air on a regular basis. It may not sound as much, but each of these smaller goals is a huge step towards an improved standard of living.

Listen to an Audiobook/Week: I don’t know if this one needs any further explanations, really. I will try to review at least half of them and I’ve made some templates to make it easier to post about it on my socials. For the longest time, I’ve been so bad at posting reviews that it’s almost shameful, but we’ll try to do better this year. I actually have the first short one ready to go. A solid 3-star read that I would love to share with my sidekick later this year.

Get My Crafting Back On: I can’t even begin to explain how much I miss my craft stash. It was boxed up for the better part of last year and it still is. Another reason I desperately need a new home. Sure, impending homelessness is a bigger concern, but sweet baby Fenrir I miss the creative process, the meditative headspace, and the joy of seeing my work find homes in other people’s lives.

Cook and Eat: I can’t even remember when I last cooked something, because of reasons, and I can’t tell you how badly I want to try new foods. Every flavour is a story and there are so many I need to consume. I have this dream, and yes this is more of a dream than a goal, but I would really love to be able to cook with my keeper again. Imagine if I got a new home that was accessible. Imagine a kitchen I could get in and out of. Imagine rooms I could get in and out of! I don’t have much ork on the best of days, but maybe, if we started small, I could…

Get Some Fresh Air: We don’t have it in London, but the dream is to move north and rumour has it people can breathe up there. After close to four years locked up in COVID isolation (yes, some of us are still shielding!) even a quick gulp of fresh air each day to remind myself of the world's vast beauty is something I dream of. And maybe this is the year it will be possible.

Do Something Fun Each Day: This is something of a mantra for me. I am a firm believer in mys, fun, love and faith as the four cornerstones of life. I am blessed in that I get to do the things I love and enjoy every day, but the goal for this year is to do more things I haven’t done before, and more things I’ve not been able to do for a long time. 

As a spoonie author, these goals are meant to lift my spirits and improve my quality of life. They are also my acts of defiance against the constraints of chronic illness and disability. Each day I write, each story I tell, is a testament to my resilience. To the power of my Resilience. In sharing this personal journey with you, I hope I can give you more than just a glimpse of my world. I would very much like to be the person who can hold up a mirror where you can see the reflection of your own resilience. 

If you are a normie who loves to read and/or write, I welcome you to step aboard my ship and sail into the vast unchartered waters we’ll be exploring this year with me. 

If you are a spoonie who loves to read and/or write, I welcome you to enter the vast parallel universe of the unwell with me. You can board my ship and move freely between our worlds.

If you don’t like to read and/or write, you are still welcome to my fikastunder here in this Sunday sanctuary of mine.

Whoever you are, whatever path led you here today, let’s step, roll, or jump into this new year together. May this be a place where our stories can intertwine, where our dreams can get a voice, and where, despite the challenges ahead of us, we can continue to create our own reality, one word, one breath at a time.

Until we meet again, may your days be filled with mys, love, fun, and faith. 

Love always,

//Linn

P.S. 

If you found something that resonated with you in my words, I have more where they came from. You can have my lore, tales from the realm of Ulfrheim and beyond delivered straight to your inbox. By signing up for my newsletter, you'll not only get a regular dose of stories, insights, and updates, but you'll also get an invitation to become a cherished member of our growing community of lovers of books and bookish things aboard my mighty pirate ship, Resilience.

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