#we were literally put on this earth to hang out and love each other and make art and sing songs and be kind to each other

[skyburger]

this tweet changed me dude

[mustyrosewater]

𝐩𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐚𝐞𝐚

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐭𝐰𝐨 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐧𝐞𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐚 𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 3,138

𝐀𝐎𝟑

𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: when she went missing, disappeared without a trace, it was almost like a deep seated black hole found it's way into rhetts chest, as he recalls all his time spent with her admist trying to find answers, the deep seated energy of the cursed lands they live on come apart to make way for lovers to find each other again.

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: supernatural elements, reader haunting the narrative except this time its literal, mentions of implied violence, implied native american mythology if you squint, rhett is going through it and doesn't know to to do it without being self destructive.

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: so part two is here a day earlier than promised because i finished it sooner than i thought, the love shown for part one motivated me greatly so thank you so much for that! i think we might have two more parts to this at absolute best, but i hope you enjoy part two. reader has implied native ancestry, but not heavily.

It had never been his place to question the mysteries of the earth, even as a child, when his mother would tell him to stay away from the treeline after the sun went down, not to look out the windows at night unless you wanted something to look back at you. Even if he put little belief into her superstitions, he could at least respect her wishes.

The night played tricks on the eyes, the shadows moving around always seemingly dancing across surfaces with a mind of their own, enough to drive any sane man to a level of insanity.

When he’d met her, it had seemed she held a bounty of superstitions just the same, yet when she’d explained it to him from her place sitting atop of his waist on the cramped single bed in his bedroom, his hands finding their place along the soft skin of her thigh’s, a bemused smile on his face as he allowed her to ramble away about the folk tales she claimed had been passed down in her family for generations.

She’d told him about how her folk had been out in these mountains for almost as long as the mountains had existed themselves, weaving her words out like a poem or a song, painting a picture of bloodied battles and old traditions long lost to history.

Her family traded in their old ways for crosses and churches, explaining that it was simply the way things were, old languages were lost in exchange for testaments and eventually everything was lost to time. 

He could tell by the way she spoke about the land that the connection ran deep, that unlike the other folk in this town, there was a deeper understanding that even she didn’t truly understand half the time. 

Sometimes she’d ramble to him about how sometimes she could have sworn she’d hear things walking around her house at night, couldn’t help but feel like there was something protecting her; she’d joke that maybe it was the spirits of her old ancestors, or maybe that she was just listening too hard to the silence at night and creating sounds that weren’t really there. 

It was always around that time that he’d pull her into his arms, telling her she didn’t have to worry about anything in these mountains while he was around, when he’d place soft kisses on the crown of her head and take in the scent of her that could bring him into pure serenity.

As he recalled the memory now from his place at the dingy bar he was currently in, he stared down at the brown liquid in the glass before him, the pain of the memory only urging him to drink down the whiskey he’d been served before he found himself tearing up in front of all the other patrons.

With her cross now hanging from his neck, hidden under the red tartan button up, he stood from his place at the bar and turned to leave.

“Wouldn’t be surprised if she jumped int’ the wrong fella’s truck and ended up dead in a ditch somewhere.” 

There was a cruel laughter shared inbetween the words, his ear practically pricking at the sound of the group of men at the bar sharing their sentiments with each other.

He didn’t want to believe they were talking about her, wanted to tell himself there was somebody else, but he couldn’t deny himself as he stood and listened, eavesdropping as they continued further.

“Ones like that, goin’ out lookin’ for a little fun, only to end up in a shallow grave.”

“Just wish she’da ended up in my backseat instead, could’a given her something better than a mouthful a’ dirt an’ worms.”

The smoker’s laugh following what the man had said was making rhett’s knuckles turn white with how tightly he was gripping his coat, his heart starting to gather up the pace of a race horse as he turned and stalked over to where the man was sitting, his back facing him as he gripped the fat fuck’s shoulders, pulling him to the ground so hard that his friend’s hardly had time to react before rhett was laying punches against the mans face.

He couldn’t see anything but red, the idea of this monster thinking he could have even come close to being within her eye sight, to talk about the daughter of a grieving mother in such a way, rhett could only thirst for as much pain being inflicted on this man as possible, so that he might feel even a fraction of what rhett was going through, that he might understand what it is to truly lose something and be helpless, be too late.

It hadn’t taken long for the man’s friends to intervene, dragging rhett away from the bleeding man, yelling profanities and raging like a wild animal; he could hardly even fight back against the strength of multiple man as they dragged him out of the bar and into the asphalt parking lot.

The hit’s they laid on him were brutal, blood coming out of his mouth as he hit the asphalt, assaulted by the plethora of kicks and punches till he couldn’t rise from the ground anymore, until his breathing brought nothing but fire against his lungs.

He can feel his coat get thrown to the ground in front of him as the men leave, only able to feel his rage and adrenaline pumping as he turned onto his back, blood pooling from his nose and mouth which he turned to spit onto the concrete. 

Rising slowly, his vision was blurred as he tried to gather himself, unable to do anything while he sat through the pain all over his body, shutting his eyes tightly as he attempted to get a handle on his breathing. 

Even with the pain coursing across his skin, the fire in his lungs, he could still have recognised that same smell of soap and perfume anywhere, the smell of her. 

Maybe he was dying, maybe the punches and kicks had done enough damage for him to finally just lay down and die; he could only lay back and slowly accept any small mercy to the pain he was currently suffering through.

Even when he feel’s the soft hand running against his face, he doesn’t open his eyes, her phantom touch doesn’t bring any pain, even when it’s pressed against the already swollen cheek that would no doubt bruise heinously.

“Why are you doing this to yourself angel.” Her voice is so subtle it almost blends into the wind itself, a whisper above the sounds of everything around him, yet even as quiet as it is, he would always have been able to hear the songbird that she was over even the loudest of commotions. 

Just as fast as he feel’s her touch, takes in her scent and hears her voice, it’s as gone as soon as it came, almost as if she was swept up in the wind. 

The sudden absence causes his eyes to open, realisation hitting that he was still there in that same parking lot, his head whipping in all directions as he sat up, convinced that her touch had felt so goddamn real there was no way that she wasn’t kneeling beside him right then and there.

-

It had taken him well over twenty minutes to get back into his truck, an even further thirty seven minutes to drive home at a snails pace using the eye that wasn’t already starting to swell up.

Even with his headlights illuminating the first road back to his home, his limited vision was providing a much harder drive than he would have liked, the pain in his rib now leaving him with only one hand to drive his truck.

Whatever it had been before in the parking lot, whatever it was that had touched him and called out to him in the darkness, he couldn’t find it in him to embrace the possibility of it being anything other than a head injury, his mind playing tricks on him over the sounds of the wildlife.

He couldn’t admit to himself that there might have even been the slightest chance that it was you, because only then would he have to admit what he didn’t want to believe was true.

Almost as if the universe was listening to him, as if it had heard his unwillingness and was now intending on getting it’s cruel revenge back onto him, it seemed to come in the form of a coyote in the middle of the road.

As it’s shape came into view, he had at least the good sense to hit the breaks, expecting the animal to simply scatter across the road, yet to his confusion, it continued to stare across at him, the glaring yellow eyes of the animal seeming to focus in on his own.

He couldn’t help but be unsettled by it’s gaze, his stomach seemingly growing into a dark pit of dread, his mind recalling her own adverse reaction to coyote’s, the way she’d told him to be wary of them, claiming that they were trickster’s that got enjoyment out of creating turmoil.

-

Even now, he could remember when the day was ending, when he’d been running his hand across her back, finger tips dancing across the soft skin on her shoulder as she laid there in his bed, eye’s shut but a soft smile on her face none the less.

The setting sun allowed for enough of an overcast in his windows to bathe them in a hue of orange light, almost like the room itself was glowing, casting itself across her in a melody of colours that made her look similar to the stain glass portraits of the saints in her church. 

They’d always talk about so many things when they had this time together, on the rare occasions that her parents wouldn’t have been expecting her back till later, when he’d been able to come get her in his truck, and they’d get to spend these precious moments in each others arms.

“Saw a coyote the other day.” he mused softly, his gaze not leaving her at all as he spoke, allowing his vision to wash over her peaceful figure. “Damn thing nearly made me crash.” he laughed softly, recalling the way he’d had to swerve his truck on the way to her house to avoid hitting it as it ran across the dirt road.

“Mhmm.” her soft hum told him that she was listening, even with her sleepyness already beginning to take over. 

He heard her repeat a word he didn’t understand, a language foreign to him; his silence telling her well enough that he didn’t understand. 

Stretching out her arms, she allowed herself a soft groan as she adjusted her tired muscles, moving herself across the sheets so that her chin was resting his chest, her arm placed inbetween them to keep her head up.

“Trickster spirit.” she clarified, her eyes now trained on him as she nodded her head matter a factly. “My father used to tell me not to look them in the eye’s, or they’ll lead you to your demise.” she spoke, sounding as though she herself even didn’t place a huge amount of merit on the story. 

“That true is it?” he responded to her, his voice slightly croaked as the pair evidently grew more and more tired, sleep on the horizon for the both of them. 

Rather than humor his answer, she leaned forward, capturing his lips as she shut her eyes once more, letting his hand run across her cheek, the rough callous’s on his hand against her own soft skin, the pair of them decided to soak up what ever time they had with each other for the night in each others arms. 

-

His recollection of the memory had him even more disturbed by the creature’s gaze on him, the way it’s eyes seemed to move far too intelligently for an animal, almost feeling like he was being analysed, studied.

It wasn’t until he could hear his heart ramming in his chest that he even realised just how terrified he found himself by the creature, feeling his anxiety kick into fight or flight, his body seeming to respond in a way that signalled an unknown danger from the animal. 

Whether it was a smart move or not, he didn’t care; but his only instinct was to hit the gas, his truck lurching to life as he shut his eyes, willing his own body to stop looking into the coyote’s eye’s, preparing himself to feel his truck bump as the creature was torn under it’s wheel’s, only to feel nothing but smooth road as he sent the truck forward.

Opening his eye’s back up as he settled back into a more reasonable speed, the sound of the skidding wheel’s silencing itself, he spared only a moment to look in the rear view mirror, expecting to find a carcass lying on the dirt.

What. the. Fuck. 

To his utter astoundment, the animal still stood, it’s head turned to watch as he peeled away.

Allowing himself only a moment to look back, he reminded himself to look forward at the road, his anxiety and dread seemingly beginning to clear the further and further he became, as if the larger the distance between him and this coyote, the safer he became.

-

Finally arriving back at his home, swinging open his door after stumbling across the parking lot of his apartment building, the comfort of his own home was barely that, his sense still practically on fire, his own heart still beating with a sense of uncertainty.

The encounter with the coyote had felt as if it had left an imprint on his very soul, the way it’s eye’s had glowed against his headlights, the image was still burned into his brain, seeing it each time he closed his eyes, an inescapable curse placed on him.

His own exhaustion had only left him able to stumble over to his bed, the cotton sheets no doubt catching some of the dried blood already starting to settle over his face, yet rhett could find no room to care about it, only allowing sleep to overtake him like a wave of ocean water.

- 

It was the dripping that woke him, a sound so miniscule against the silence, and yet loud enough to have his eyes snapping open, a dull echo against his ears as it continued it’s slow and incoehsive rhythm.

Even from where he was laying, he could it was emerging from the small hallway in his apartment, the kitchen at the other end being the only light that was creeping across the walls. 

He knew the sink had always been faulty, no matter how many times the landlord had sent over handyman to fix it, as well as the times rhett had tried to fix it himself, it persevered, dripping almost every night to the point he’d become accustomed to the sound. 

Whether or not he was even completely awake yet he didn’t know, yet he rose from the bed anyway, only allowing himself a quick glance at his alarm clock as he approached the hallway, the red glowing numbers showing him the time.

4:02 AM.

Just as quickly as he’d taken notice of the time, his head had turned to the entrance of the hallway, his blood running cold within the span of miliseconds, his body going still as he felt his hands beginning to shake.

The dripping was so loud now to the point it almost felt deafening, his eye’s were wide as he stared across at the figure in the hallway, the kitchen light casting a shadow which left him unable to make out any details other than the dark silhouette before him.

The figure was drenched, dripping wet as a puddle settled on the floor underneath them, there was nothing but silence, the only sound audible in that moment being the ever present dripping, falling off of the shadowed figure and onto the floor.

How long he stood there in a terrified silence he didn’t know, it could have been seconds, minutes or even hours, he wasn’t sure, all he could feel in that moment was white, hot terror.

In an instant, the shadow moved faster than his eyes could comprehend, advancing on him from the hallway in seconds as darkened hands wrapped around his throat, sending both of them to the ground.

Yet rather than the feeling of the linoleum floor of his apartment, rhett suddenly found himself thrust under water, the hands holding him under, their grip so strong on his throat that it burned his lungs, his own hands trying to grip at the figure’s wrists, his vision now blurred as his head was held under the water.

As his eye’s did open, his obscured vision painted a picture of daylight above the water, the figure no longer a being of shadow, now the blurry image of what he could recognise to be a man holding him under.

Almost as quickly as it had happened, rhett suddenly commanded the strength to wrench himself up and out of the water, commanding his lungs to breathe in deeply.

Yet now here he was, sitting in the same bed he had fallen asleep in, his lungs gasping in the breath’s of air he’d been fighting for only seconds ago, his heart was hammering to the point it felt like it would burst out his chest any second, the sharp pain in his throat feeling just as real as it had in his dream.

But if it had been a dream, he had no answer for the way his lungs burned as if they’d been deprived for air, why he could have sworn his head and face had felt only slightly too damp to only be sweat.

As his mind ran with questions, he could only find himself quickly jumping from the bed, almost sliding on the floor as he made his way to the entrance of the hallway, his eyes landing on the spot where that same figure had been.

Trying to rationalise with himself had worked so far, each and every occurrence thus far had been something he’d been able to explain to himself, convince himself that his grief had begun to play tricks on him, that his injuries had caused him to hallucinate voices and smell’s that weren’t there.

But as he knelt on the ground, and placed his finger onto the puddle that still remained where the shadow had stood previously; the way that the water itself seemingly reeked on the creek near the church.

He could find little room left in his soul for any further rationalisation.

[rekino2114]

I just thought up a prompt for Kanade otonokoji being proposed to. How about She's hanging out with her boyfriend when suddenly he's says he doesn't wanna be her boyfriend any longer which leads Kanade into having yandere thoughts, when suddenly he says that he wants to be her husband instead. I was hoping you could also do this for Arei and Teruko is possible.

You propose to kanade, teruko, and arei by saying you don't want to be their bf anymore

Kanade otonokoji

"I don't wanna be your boyfriend anymore?"

"Huh?"

Kanade actually felt surprised when you said that, which is uncommon for her to say the least

This wasn't supposed to happen, kanade loved you with her entire being. You had no idea what she would do for you if you just asked her. You were her darling, the most important person on the entire planet. No one else in this world even came close to your perfection. She genuinely couldn't live without you.

What did she do wrong? She treated you like a God on this earth. She would have given you literally anything you could have wanted, just in exchange of you loving her and staying with her forever. If you just told her what she did wrong, she could fix it

Or maybe she could try to fix you, just to change your pretty little head a bit, not as much as hibiki of course, she still wanted you to love her of your own volition but maybe she could just make it so you loved her just as much as she loved you, she would have just put some beautiful thoughts in your brain about her and you wouldn't have even known the difference. Just to ensure that you would never leave her

"I want to be your husband"

Oh.............nevermind

All of her previous thoughts disappeared, and her head was now filled with images of your wedding and life together. She hugged you and ranted about how much she loved you and was glad you weren't leaving her.

She should have never doubted you. Of course, you loved her, and of course you were going to be together forever, and she didn't need to do absolutely anything to you to make sure of that........but that idea did sound pretty fun, maybe she should try it on hibiki next time

Teruko tawaki

"I don't wanna be your boyfriend anymore"

As much as she doesn't want to admit it, teruko knew this day would come.

It was just inevitable. Her luck had taken everything away from her, her family, her health and it would have eventually taken her life. She was used to it at this point.

But there was someone her luck couldn't have taken away from her, her happiness, which was you, the fact that you entered her life alone was the luckiest thing to have ever happened to her, and the fact that you loved her and stayed with her trough everything, that was the best thing in her life period. You were the best thing in her life.....so obviously it had to end.

The worst part about this is that she really couldn't blame you. Who would wanna date someone who, just by being near you, puts your life at risk? She was fine with her luck affecting her even if she hated seeing you sad whenever she got hurt, but the fact that you could be hurt just because you loved her was just so unfair and it broke her heart.....so it was probably for the best to end this

She knew this would happen so she promised herself not to cry......even if it hurt so mu-

"I want to be your husband"

"W-what?"

She was more surprised by your proposal than your sentence from before, but when she fully realized what was happening she obviously said yes and hugged you

"You made me so worried"

"Why?"

"Did you think "I don't want to be your boyfriend anymore" would be a good opening for a proposal?"

"I didn't think you'd instantly assume I'd wanna break up with you, I love you so much teru, I thought you knew, I would never ever leave you"

"..........thank you"

"It's nothing, I'm sorry"

"No it's fine.........I'm just really happy now...... can we stay like this for a while?"

"Of course, anything for you teru"

You stayed wrapped in each other's arms for longer, and teruko could feel herself smiling so wide......she had never been this happy to be wrong

Arei nageishi

"I don't wanna be your boyfriend anymore"

"..........wait what?"

Arei though this was a prank for a few seconds, it had to be, you couldn't have been serious, there was no way you, one of the incredibly few people she actually gave a shit about in the world and that she even loved more than anything would abandon her like this.

There was no way you were just willing to throw away everything you worked towards, all of the talks and help you gave her in trying to become at least a little bit less shitty, she had never wanted to become a so called good person but she wanted to at least be someone who people wouldn't raise their eyebrows at when they saw you together, so that people wouldn't ask you if she was forcing you to date her whenever you announced that she was your girlfriend........even if she would never admit it.......she wanted to become someone worthy of you with your help.

So there was no way you would just give her the hope that she could become less shitty and then just leave her alone like that, did you even love her at all?

Even if she promised herself to beat the shit out of you later for this she knew it would have never happened, she loved you too much to let that happen..........why the hell was she still this soft with you?

"I want to be your husband"

"..........seriously?"

Arei wants to be mad at you for starting your proposal like that, but the genuine happiness in her heart that your words caused didn't leave any anger in her body, so she just hugged you and grabbed the ring, saying "obviously" in the meantime

"That was the worst proposal ever by the way"

"What do you mean?"

"How am I not supposed to think you want to break up with me after you say something like that?"

".......now that you put it like that, I guess you're right"

"You're a dumbass"

"But you still said yes"

"......yeah.....cause I love you"

"I love you too arei.....I can't wait to marry you"

Arei looked at her new ring and then back at you, she flashed you a smile, a pure and genuine smile

"Me too"

[harlowtales]

Jack finds the love of his life who has never been kissed…or anything else 😘

♥️💝♥️

18+ Adult Themes - Romance/Drama/Sex

“Jack stop.” You said, unsure where this was going. You had never kissed anyone let alone had sex. It was time to say something before things went too far. You were saving it for the right person…your husband, and a rapper was definitely not it. You shouldn’t even have taken his invitation to go to the movies but Jack seemed very sweet and down to earth. You figured there was no harm in a movie, but it was going too fast. His hands were starting to go places. You were in the back of an old theatre watching an Alfred Hitchcock movie as they were Jack’s favourite movies.

“Y/N what’s wrong? I thought we were feeling each other” Jack said confused as he sat back.

“Well right here…right now was my first kiss. Jack I…I’m a virgin.” There was no other way than to just tell him. Your palms were sweating and your heart was beating so loudly you thought the whole empty theatre could hear it.

“Say on god.” Jack said in shock

“Swear to god.” You said earnestly “I’m sorry. Can you take me home?”

“If I ruined everything I’m so sorry Y/N.” Jack apologized “I will absolutely take you home if that’s what you really want.”

“I feel so stupid. I usually know better than to waste the time of someone like you. I mean, you’re Jack Harlow. Of course you want to…well you know.” You said in embarrassment.

“Right here, I can tell you I would fucking marry you if I knew it wouldn’t scare the shit out of you.” Jack said in disbelief that he had found a 24 year old virgin. “If you let me be the first, I will be your only.”

“Jack please. I need to go.” All you wanted to do was escape this moment. You weren’t prepared for wanting to do it with him in that movie theatre and that scared you. Jack was incredibly handsome and charming. He was intelligent and funny, tall and distinguished. Everything you ever dreamed of in a man was all in him. You had to get away from him as soon as humanly possible.

You pulled up in front of your parent’s house and your dad instantly peeled the living room curtains back to make sure you didn’t hang out too long in Jack’s car. Jack had to actually introduced himself to your father and ask to take you out in the first place. He saw you with your family at an event his mother put on for charity and knew he had to shoot his shot. Your dad insisted on him coming to the house and properly introducing himself first. It felt like the 1950’s but he appreciated it. Now you being a virgin was all starting to make sense.

“Ughh. He’s literally going to stare at us until I’m in the door. You better walk me to the door or he’ll think you weren’t raised right.” You cautioned.

“Y/N it’s all fine.” Jack laughed “I ain’t going away so pops better get used to me.”

“What? You mean, this isn’t the end?” You said in surprise.

“Why would it be? Cuz I got bitches on speed dial?” Jack said characteristically raising an eyebrow. “If you let me be your first, you would be my only girl. Anything else I had going on would be done for me. Let me make it special for you Y/N.” Jack put a soft hand on your thigh.

You felt a heat rising in you that you never felt before. “Jack call me um…call me later. I have to go. He’s watching us. Open my car door, walk me to the door. Don’t hold my hand. Don’t kiss me on the cheek. Say goodnight to him and shake his hand. Got it?” You said giving Jack the cheat code to dealing with your strict parents.

After some weeks Jack kept calling and spending time with you whenever he could. He FaceTimed you from his European tour and it was no pressure. He never even mentioned sex. You started to think you not putting out had caused him to lose interest in you romantically and it was just turning into a friendship. Jack wanted you more and more, he just didn’t want to scare you away so he was being patient.

The tour was over and he was finally back home. He knew he had to ease you into thinking he was the right one to lose your virginity with. He decided to go to your house and approach your parents about dating you seriously. If that’s what it took that’s what he was willing to do.

Jack was sweating he was so nervous. Your parents came into the living room with just the clock ticking in the background.

“So Y/N tells me you want to date her.” Your dad said

“I know you’re strict. I want to respect that.” Jack said seriously. You were sitting across from him as sitting on the same couch would not have been deemed appropriate by your parents.

“Very protective.” Your mother chimed in “Why does someone in your line of work want to date my daughter?”

“My line of work? You mean a rapper?” Jack said with a tinge of sass. You shot him a look to chill.

“Yes. Entertainment is not for our girl.” Your dad said

“Well I would make sure she’s always with me and protected. I’m very protective as well. You can ask my family that I’m very close too.” Jack explained.

“She can date on a few conditions. She has to check in with us and no sex before marriage. Do you intend on marrying her or is she just one of your many girls?” Your mother asked embarrassing you.

Jack started turning red partly from embarrassment and partly from getting a bit upset. He was sure he would propose at some point or he would have left your house from this grilling by your parents.

“I know I have a reputation but I have intentions of marrying your daughter as soon as she’s ready.” Jack said. A lump formed in his throat. He wasn’t planning on saying that but it came out and he wasn’t sorry. The silence that followed was amplified by the ticking clock.

“Is anyone going to ask me what I want? Do I matter?” You said raising your voice. “I am 24 mom, dad, come on! I’m a grown woman! I’ve done everything you wanted my whole life. I want to date Jack…I will date Jack.”

“Y/N! Really? Hunny you see? He’s influenced her already!” Your father said to your mother like Jack wasn’t there.

“How rude! Jack is right here.” You said

“Y/N please your parents are right. Maybe I should go.” Jack said making s move to leave.

“I’m coming.” You said defiantly

“Walk out the door and don’t come back.” Your dad said.

“Oh fine with me.” You huffed.

“Y/N these are your parents. Please, listen to them.” Jack pleaded with you much to your parent’s surprise.

“Well Jack. Son. I’m impressed with you.” Your dad said “I approve, but talk some sense into her.”

“Will do sir. She’s safe with me.” Jack said assuredly

“What was that? I thought you were on my side?” You said haughtily as you left with Jack to go for a drive.

“I fucking got my hands full.” Jack murmured

“Excuse me?” You said like a spoiled brat.

“Listen princess let’s get one thing straight ok?” Jack said heading away from the park.

“Jack where are we going?” You asked concerned

“Shush for fuck sakes.” Jack said rolling his eyes with a slight giggle

You pulled into the parking of a building and headed into an elevator. When the doors opened to a sprawling condo you realized he had taken you to his penthouse apartment. “Get comfy cuz this is where you’ll probably wind up with your attitude. Geez I feel sorry for your parents. Hungry?”

“Ummm yes. Yes please Jack. Thank you.” You said instantly more polite.

“That’s better.” Jack said kissing you on the forehead. “I want this place to be your place but you have to behave.”

“Ok sir Jack sir!” You said saluting him and laughing.

“Oh yeah? You getting cheeky?” Jack said towering over you. You were like a magnet for him. He pulled you close into a passionate kiss. Your space ached like you had never felt. You longed to be his in every way.

“Y/N I can take you home if…” but you cut Jack off with another deep kiss to his amazement “Take me.” You said looking him right in the eye.

“Y/N come on…” but you pulled Jack towards his bedroom.

“Now? You sure?” He said cautiously

“Please Jack. I need you.” You said in agony

“Baby…I’m scared. I don’t want to hurt you.” He said caressing your hair.

“I know it will hurt but if not now…when?” You reasoned looking up at him.

“Y/N there’s no rush. I meant it. I will marry you.” Jack promised, knowing he was caving in fast. You had a hold on him that was undeniable.

“Come.” He commanded as he sat on the bed and opened his legs for you to stand in front of him. You obeyed and went closer.

He began going up your shirt, fondling your breasts and kissed your bare stomach. You threw back your head and moaned. You saw Jack growing and reached down to touch him but he stopped your hand.

“No. I…I’m sorry Y/N this doesn’t feel right. I’ll take you back.” Jack said. In his mind it was going to happen so differently. He brought you to his place for you to start getting comfortable there. He was used to being around you…wanting you and not being able to really be inside you, he was the one that was hesitant now, and how crazy and special would it be for him to marry a virgin. “We’re not married. This isn’t right.” He couldn’t imagine the looks on your parent’s faces if they found out.

“Are you kidding me? They got to you. They fucking got to you. Wait….you’re not into me anymore are you? I knew it. It felt like a friendship last little while. I should have known.” You burst into tears “I’m not model gorgeous and exciting like what you’re used to.”

“Baby…no no no I have never been in love until now. Did you know that?” Jack said looking at you as you sat on his lap now. “I am very attracted to you. Don’t worry.”

“Then make love to me….Please Jack.” You said softly drawing him into a kiss.

“Ok, I…ok.” He said unable to refuse any longer. You pulled your shirt off over your head and stepped out of your jeans. He was in awe of how perfectly your breasts hung and the curve of your body. “I can’t believe I’m the first to ever see all this and touch you…be inside you.” Jack breathed overcome with emotion.

He gently laid you down kissing and caressing your body. You gasped having never felt such sensations. “Oh god Jack.”

There was no turning back now. He had waited so long.

“It hurts too much and I’m stopping ok?” Jack said lovingly. You nodded in agreement under him, drinking in his aroma and feeling his chest. He tried not to put his full weight on you as your legs opened to take him in. He tested your space dipping in with the head only and pulling back. It was such a foreign feeling you held your breath from the pressure slowly pressing into you.

“You ok?” He asked as he hovered over you about to re-enter a little more.

“Put it all the way in. I’m ok.” You assured him

“We can just play with each other baby. We don’t have to do this all the…” Jack was trying to say

“Can you please just…I want to feel all of you.” You said a bit frustrated and anxious

“Ok baby. Hold onto me ok?” Jack cautioned. He was beyond excited but had to contain himself for your comfort. He held his shaft steadily as he guided it in carefully. You were wet with anticipation but it still was painful. You tried to hide it as much as possible to not make Jack feel bad, but he saw the look on your face and paused afraid to stroke in and out. One thing for sure, your future husband was gifted and it would take getting used to.

“Oh, uhhh, oh my god.” You breathed unable to make sense of the new pain and slight pleasure you were starting to feel as Jack slowly glided partially out and slid back in.

“Ah fuck you feel good baby.” He said breathlessly in your ear. “I’ve waited for this moment” Jack was poised on top of you and concentrating on being as gentle as possible as he went in further and further. Tears started welling up in your eyes with a burning pain radiating through your abdomen and legs as he picked up some speed and put more weight behind his thrusts. You held onto him tightly unable to really move.

After a few moments he suddenly cried out “Uh Y/N!! Baby” You felt your flesh tear apart inside and a warm sensation run down your thighs. There was blood on the sheets from your hymen popping. You were mortified.

“Oh my god Jack!” You exclaimed in tears. He immediately stopped and headed to the bathroom to start the shower and bring you a towel. He wiped you up lifted you off the bed and carried you to the shower. He held you from behind, his arms supporting you as he sung a Bryson Tiller song gently. His smooth melodic voice amplified in the shower filled you with warmth as the pain started to subside.

He wrapped you in a towel and held your hand to his closet where he dressed you in his shorts and hoodie. He combed your hair for you and settled you on the couch. After grabbing you a snack he went to strip the bed sheets and ran back to snuggle with you.

“Are you ok baby?” He asked sweetly “Do you need anything else?”

“Jack please just relax with me. Thank you for looking after me.” You said tiredly. It had been a rollercoaster of emotions your stomach ached, your space hurt, and your legs were like jello. He snuck in behind you and you rested on him as he covered both of you in a blanket.

“After all that you get the remote Mrs. Harlow…this one time ok?” He joked. You giggled snuggling up to him and falling asleep.

@itsyagirljaz @okaaay-mice

[canadianfangirl-95]

Choose One. 

Triple Frontier character x f! reader

Don’t talk to me this was supposed to be a drabble but idk how to stop. No description because this literally feels like I took 4 pages out of a book and threw them down with no explanation.

No specific TF character is the love interest, choose one of them as your fave and enjoy the angsty ride. No description of reader, nicknames Black Widow and princess.

Warnings- mention of smutty stuff but pretty tame, Tom being an SOB, swearing, drinking 

Word count- 2700  

The evening air in the small South American town you were based in was growing cooler as the sun had set. You were seated, squished between two of your teammates, Frankie and Will, while Benny and Santi sat on the floor of the common area building, leaning against a small coffee table. Each of you were putting back beers like they were the last on earth, and just enjoying each other’s company. The conversation had swiftly changed to the favourite subject of the group, Santi’s love life.  

Will commented, “I think we all know the biggest slut around here is Pope. Didn’t you hook up with Tara from scheduling last week? She was only here for 3 days, and you still managed to get her into bed.” he said, leaning past you to give Santi a shit eating grin. 

The group let out a boisterous laugh at Santi’s copious infidelities. He threw his hands up conceding, “Hey laugh it up, if I’m gonna be teased for getting laid the most I will gladly take it.”  

Benny interjected, “Honestly, considering Black Widow is one of the only women at this base, I can’t believe she isn’t the one who’s getting laid the most.” He pointed at you, to which you shrugged and brought your cold beer to your lips with a smirk. You had your fair share of base affairs, but every guy you had tried out failed to truly satisfy you the way you needed, so they didn’t stay on the roster very long. Besides, they were only ever a distraction from what you truly wanted but couldn’t have. 

Santi nodded along, “Yeah why are you hanging out with us all the time when you could be getting it on every minute of the day?” 

You chewed the inside of your cheek in thought before responding, “Maybe that’s the thing, there’s not a whole lot of fun when it’s just like a guaranteed thing. I at least want to work for it a little, cuz in all honestly, I think with all single men considered, you guys are only one’s at this base who haven’t tried to sleep with me.”  

You let out a chuckle as the group went quiet, each of them looking at one another with an embarrassed look on their faces. Frankie’s ears grew red underneath his curly brown locks and baseball hat. You immediately noticed the way Santi downed the rest of his drink and Benny and Will exchanged a knowing glance.  

Your eyebrows furrowed with confusion at the sudden change in demeanor. “What’d I say?” 

 Frankie leaned in and shook his head, “Nothing, you didn’t say anything wrong.” 

“Okay, well then why does it feel like something just happened?” You questioned.  

Benny went to open his mouth but was quickly slapped on the arm by Will, causing him to look away from your gaze toward the dull beige ceiling that was adorned with water stains.  

You perked up in your seat between Frankie and Will on the old leather couch, “Okay, now you guys are freaking me out, what’s up?” 

The air grew thicker as Santi finally turned his attention back to you with a huff, “Widow, now don’t shoot the messenger here,” he said putting his hands on his chest to speak as earnestly as possible, “but when you joined the team, Tom made us all promise not to sleep with you.”  

Your mouth dropped; you had been a part of this team as their sniper for 8 months. Four of the guys had welcomed you with open arms, but not Tom. He had been nothing but a pain in your ass since the moment the Sergeant introduced you. You still remember the day vividly. Being transferred out of your old team after months of belittlement by the macho muscle heads you had been paired with. Each of them had welcomed you with a smile and worked hard to form a personal bond with you. Except for Tom of course, he immediately started calling you princess and continued the belittlement of your previous squad.  

Before you could speak, none other than Tom entered the common area room you were all seated in. Blood boiled to the surface as you rose from your seat and started towards him. Meak calls of protest rang out behind you from the group of men, but it was pointless. Your red face was met with his equally aggressive facade.  

Stopping mere feet in front of him you crossed your arms and raised your head high, “You son of a bitch who do you think you are deciding who I can and can’t sleep with?” You said with a strong tone.  

Tom’s eyebrows popped up with shock, he looked over your shoulder to the four men all seated with their heads down. He smirked and turned his attention back to you. “So, they finally told you huh? That’s fine, it was the right decision then and it’s the right decision now.”  

“I have worked tirelessly for this team for 8 months, and yet you still only have ever seen me as a,- a sexual thing and a fucking distraction. You’ve never seen me as the same as anyone else here on this team.” Heat rising in your voice with each matter-of-fact word.  

Tom scoffs and crosses his arms, “Don’t get all self-righteous on me princess. You’re no better than any of us when it comes to sexualizing your team. As if you haven’t thought about each and every one of us here. Even me I bet; you seem like you’d be into a little hate sex.”  

You stuttered, “In your fucking dreams Tom-,” 

“No, actually, in yours. Don’t think we haven’t heard you. We all share that bunk house.” His voice lowered to a seductive whisper, and you took a deep swallow.  “You really think we haven’t heard the deep breathing, the slight moans, the creak in the box spring, all coming from your bed late at night. Or maybe you wanted us to hear it. Maybe while you do it, you’re thinking about what would happen if one of us heard and decided to slide into bed with you. What would happen if one of us finally broke that boundary, offering to finish you off. So, before you come at me, claiming I only see you as a sexual thing, why don’t you think about how many times you’ve gotten off thinking about one of us in these 8 months.” 

Your body shivered and your hair stood straight on your arms. His words cut through you like a knife, as you knew that most of it was true. The four men behind you were some of the most attractive men you’d ever met and were kind to boot. Of course you had thought about them, who wouldn’t, but it was none of Tom’s business, nevertheless.  

He looked up in thought, enjoying your stunned moment, as the rest of the guys held breaths and chewed fingernails, desperate not to get pulled into the situation. “You know, I told the Sergeant that I’d be willing to make it work with you, but now I’m not so sure. Maybe it’s about time you transfer to another base where there are less, what did you call it? Distractions.” he said pointedly, staring into your eyes with fire.  

You glared back at him, considering your options. Finally, an idea sparked, and you were willing to try it if it meant you would be staying on this team. Not just to continue being a thorn in Tom’s side, but to stay with the guys you had developed so many feelings for. Especially the one you had felt your heart tug toward for months now. Pulling your stern look into a sly smirk, you take a step inward and drop your arms to your sides, caging Tom in with your body to the point that he was doing his best not to touch your chest with his crossed arms. “You know Tom, you actually missed the beginning of this conversation. In which I informed the guys that besides them, every other single man on this base has tried to sleep with me. Give that some thought, and then accept the fact that, I’m not going anywhere.” You bite your lip and step back, turning your back on him and returning to the seated area where the group was sitting. You decided not to make eye contact with them as you collected your drink and phone. Turning swiftly on your heels you started towards the door, calling out just as you were about to exit, “Don’t wait up for me boys, got some business to take care of.” You declare with a wink, flipping your hair over your shoulder as you leave.  

Tom turns his head away from the door and pinches the bridge of his nose, “Is the Sergeant single?” he asks with a deep breath out his nose.  

Nodding his head, looking down at the cool white tile flooring of the room Will responds, “Yeah, got divorced last year.”  

“Son of bitch, isn’t that fucking great.” Tom exhales. “What the fuck guys?” he asks, turning his attention to the men and opening his arms wide. 

Santi’s mouth gapped, “Us? What about you? You’re the one that came up with that misogynistic rule and that fucking violating monologue.” He pointed towards the door you left from, exasperated by the situation.  

Tom waved his hands authoritatively, “You know what, I don’t wanna hear about it. We have a meeting at 8 tomorrow, if she’s not there, she’s out and I don’t care who she’s slept with. I’ll personally escort her stateside if I have to. All of you get some shut eye.” He turned and bound out the door, slamming it closed behind him.  

A chill fell upon the group as they released the breaths they were holding, unsure of what was to come.  

Benny scratched his nose and said in a low voice, “I thought I was the only one.” 

Frankie crossed his arms on his chest and leaned back asking, “Only one for what?” 

He shrugged, “Only one to hear her. Have you guys?” he asked, looking between the three uncomfortable faces around him.  

Santi let out a groan as he stood from his seat on the floor, “We all do it man, keeps us sane. Just supposed to ignore it.”  

Frankie and Benny shared an agonizing glance and stood, all of them retreating to their bunks in silence. Each of them lay there awake, wondering if you were going to come back that night, and when the clock chimed for midnight, they knew they had their answer.  

In all honesty, sleeping with the Sergeant wasn’t something you were expecting would be happening. He was actually quite handsome with a Kevin Costner vibe to him and showed you a good time. Plus, you certainly wouldn’t have to be worrying about Tom medaling in your assignment now that you’ve got his boss wrapped around your finger. When you arrived back to the bunk house it was empty, all of the team had seemingly already left for the morning assignment meeting.  

“She’s gonna be here.” Frankie said sternly, leaning against a desk, bracing his hands on the cool wood top as Benny paced in front of him.  

“I don’t know man she was pretty pissed last night.” The younger man stated, scratching the back of his head and looking sheepishly at the door.  

Will and Santi sat at the desks lined up in the room, arms crossed and giving each other worried glances. Benny startled as Tom entered carrying his clip board of the assignment run down. He glanced around the room and smirked taking notice in your absence.  

“Well, if princess isn’t here in let’s see,” he pulls his wrist to his face to analyze the time on his watch, “30 seconds I guess we’ll be looking for a new sniper again. Shame really, she was a good shot, just couldn’t shut the fu-,” 

“Morning, gentleman, and Tom.” You say as you skip through the open door, brushing past Tom and taking a seat on the desk beside Santi. Crossing your arms and legs and providing Tom with a pointed stare. The rest of the men looked to one another with utter shock and fear of your boldness.  

Tom gave a strong huff, “Just on time, late night?”  

“Late night, early morning. The Sergeant says hi by the way.” You say with a wink.  

He bares his teeth and shifts on his feet, “Alright, I’ve been thinking about our little issue here. I may have over stepped.” He puts on a sly grin and your defenses only triple, unsure where this false change of heart might be coming from.  

“You’re right, you and the guys here should be able to sleep with whomever you want. So, by all means, choose one.” he says, squaring his shoulders with confidence. 

Your eyebrows pop up in confusion, “Choose one?” You repeat.  

He shrugs and gestures to the men, “Yeah, choose one. Clearly you want to otherwise you wouldn’t have thrown such a fit. I’m a reasonable guy, but I do still think it would be a bad idea for you to be toe curling with everyone here. So, as a compromise, you can have one of them.” 

You take a deep breath, considering his proposition. Glancing around the room at the four men, they all look at you with desperate faces. Your eyes meet with the one you’ve been falling for all this time and a shiver runs through your body as his eyes burn into you with desire. All that’s been unspoken between the two of you slowly bubbling to the surface as you both consider what Tom has said. This whole time you thought he wouldn’t be interested. Wouldn’t want you the way you wanted him. Knowing now by the look on his face, the only thing truly keeping the two of you apart was the juvenile rule Tom had thrust upon him. His eyes said a thousand words. I want you. I’ve wanted you this whole time. Choose me. Love me the way I love you. You’ve thought about it a hundred times. What it would be like to finally take his face in your hands and pull him close in for a kiss. What it would sound like for the words that hung in your throat to finally spill out and for him to say the same. How it would feel to have his hand skate up the back of your uniform and settle on the small of your back before falling desperately into the sheets. 

Your daydreams and pining were suddenly cut short when your attention was brought back to the clearing of Toms throat. You shift your weight on the desk, “Interesting proposition Tom, I’ll have to think about it.”  

He grits his teeth, “Oh come on princess, I think you should give us an answer right now. Don’t wanna leave the guys hanging. They deserve to know who is gonna get the absolute pleasure of the Sergeants sloppy seconds.”  

You shake your head and roll your eyes at his derogatory comment, “You had the night to think about it Tom, I think I deserve the same.”  

The group looks to Tom, awaiting his answer. He takes a scan of the room and sees the stern faces. Nodding confidently, “Once again, I’m a reasonable man. We’ll talk tomorrow. Today, we have a day trip to take, and I want everyone focused anyway.” he says, snapping his knuckles on the clipboard in his hand. 

As Tom drummed on about the plan, you stole your last weary glance at the man you longed for, that you may finally have within reach. The one you’ll choose and will choose you, everyday for the rest of your lives. 

[my-castles-crumbling]

hi cas! i hoping you might be able to give me some advice?

my best friend and i have been friends our whole lives (i just turned 24 two weeks ago, she's turning 24 in two weeks) but ive been have some upsetting feelings about the friendship. i love her so, so much and i know beyond doubt that the feeling is overwhelmingly mutual and there's nothing in the world that could ever change that. i feel very lucky to have a relationship like that, and i feel bad for feeling unsatisfied in some ways with our friendship? we only ever hang out when i ask to which means i can usually count on one hand the amount of times i see her in a whole calendar year lol, we don't talk much and when we do its usually me initiating (again) about stuff about my life and i dont hear much about hers in return (to the point that, she's having a baby next month (!!) and i only learned their name from overhearing someone else's conversation, i only learned the baby room theme the same way, she didn't ask me to help with her gender reveal (nor did she tell me beforehand (which is genuinely so fine, but literally everyone in attendance was surprised that i didnt know so i ended upset about it anyways) or her baby shower (she also didn't include me in any plans or keep me in the loop about anything when she got married a few years ago). ive talked to her so many times about how im feeling about our friendship and how much id liked to be as close as we used to be, if you're claiming im your best friend how on earth am i not worth being told your babies name? she never even told me names they were thinking of. nothing ever comes out of talking to her about it, she expresses sympathy and gets better about things for a minute but then by the next week its exactly back to how it was. shes always been like this to some degree, even when we were closer, but its been getting unbearable now that were out of school and don't live in walking distance of each other anymore. i know having your friendships tested is just a general part of growing up and im just as a fragile age, but im really tired of feeling like i have to beg and plead to have a place in her life; but i don't ever want to completely cut her out of my life so im trying to adapt and content myself with this new dynamic. but since she's about to have a baby all i can think about is how that kid is going to grow up barely knowing who i am and i dont know how to get over that.

oh my god you are living my life lol

I honestly have been through something so similar.

I guess the thing I realized is that some people are able to give you different things at different times in their lives. And expecting them to give you more when they can't/aren't willing to is just hurting you, you know? It sounds like right now, this friend just can't give you more. Not in a malicious way, they just can't. So then the question is, are you willing to give them amount you are giving, only getting what you're getting, or do you want to put that effort into some other people too?

It's okay to decide to put less into a friendship if you're not getting what you need. (It's also okay to be the one putting more in RIGHT NOW, if you know they need that. Obviously, there are times in life (loss, breakups, pregnancies) when friends need more than they can give.) But since it seems like it is usually you putting more in, I wonder what it would feel like if you pulled back a bit?

Naming you 24 anon

[werewolfcave]

The Calamity Trio's love for each other shines most on the precipice of conflict. Additionally it is only through their conflicts that they truly define what they mean to each other and when they define who they are to themselves. It is through these moments that they grasp onto who they are. Such is the nature of adolescence and obsession. It is through these conflicts that they manage to break apart from one another and realize what their true natures are, but it is also only in their conflicts where metal meets metal that they are able to make known their own growth and change.

In conflict is when you finally spit out what you can't say, and in a trio of manipulation and repression there is so much that they have not said to each other. There is so much that hangs over their heads, and the one most out of the loop is Anne. It is through these conflicts she is able to truly grasp who her friends are, she finds that Sasha is someone with a rage that burns like fire and has a deep-seated need for control to the point of self destruction, and that he is deeply insecure and cares so much it burns as bright as his rage (See: Reunion, The Third Temple, True Colors, Commander Anne, and Sasha's Angels), and Marcy, who Anne finds out is someone who is deeply analytical and can take care of them self, and that they are someone who would rather run than confront change and is capable of being just as manipulative as Sasha if not more (see: Marcy at the Gates, and True Colors). These conflicts are deeply vital for Anne to understand not only her friends, but the person that she was back on Earth. And it is through Anne's conflicts that we the audience understand Sasha and Marcy, without her we wouldn't see the contrasts of who they were vs who they have become.

This chart made by @sashannes based on a conversation we had puts it very well in which it is through the lens of Anne we understand the shift of presentation and true self's complexity.

But how does Sasha and Marcy as a lens help us, the audience, understand Anne? Well first and foremost it is through Anne that we understand that Anne is Heart. It is through the miscommunication or lack of communication between Marcy and Sasha that we realize the bridge between them is Anne. When encountering Sasha in the Third Temple, Marcy does not question Sasha merely reacts to Sasha in a very friendly manner despite what Anne has told them about Toad Tower, and in True Colors, Sasha does not question Marcy instead simply responds "You've got to be kidding me." with a deep distain. Neither of them feel the need to try to understand the other, they feel they understand enough from their similarities. Matt Braly himself describes the relationship between Sasha and Marcy as "professional." Anne is what connects them, Anne is quite literally the Heart. Matt Braly in that same interview mentions that Sasha and Marcy do not yet know to appreciate Anne being the glue that sticks them together, they are young and don't realize the importance of Heart.

This brings up back to the question at hand, how do these conflicts help us understand Anne? Not only do they help us understand how Anne is Heart, but they help us understand the depth of Anne's role and the person she is deep down. When Sasha is hanging off of Toad Tower, the way that Anne reacts is in such way where it feels as if Anne has done this before. Telling Sasha repeatedly to look at her that everything is going to be fine, it's immediate, it's almost as if it's going through the motions. In a way this tells us that not only was in Anne's job to protect Marcy from themself (making sure they didn't walk or trip into things or generally get hurt by being clumsy or inattentive) it might have also been Anne's job to save Sasha from himself. It is in this way that we further establish Anne as a protector, a guardian of her friends. When Marcy confesses to trapping the Trio in Amphibia, Anne is revolted and distances herself from them. But when Andrias reveals his plan to it's fullest, Anne stands by both Marcy and Sasha who had betrayed her in that same episode and says "The three of us may have made some mistakes, but you, you're evil." In this we see how Anne is able to set aside what has occurred, and face towards something bigger than their issues. Unlike Sasha (who became so consumed by his drive to regain control after a betrayal that he almost killed himself, Grime, Percy, and Braddock), unlike Marcy (who became so consumed by the need for things to stay the same that they sent the three of them into another dimension), Anne sets her feelings aside and turns to the problem at hand. We see that Heart does not just mean that she is the feeling of the group, but instead that she is the connection and she has a better grip ON her feelings. Sasha has such an overflow of emotions they explode out of him frequently, and Marcy's emotions bottle up until they break. Anne through the series to this point has learned the lessons she needs in order to take hold of how she feels and point it towards what is necessary. We see her in contrast to Sasha and Marcy. It is through conflict we see who Anne Boonchuy is, and it is through conflict and the eyes of a King, Anne Boonchuy sees who she is.

"Who Am I?" At the beginning, Anne cannot answer that question, her self in too muddied in being the mediator in being the accomplice at doing what was easy. By the end Anne realizes, who she wants to be with the help of the Plantars, and with the help of the conflict she has gone through on their behalf or with their support. But she is only able to see herself in the eyes of Andrias because of her experiences with Sasha and Marcy. It is in this fight that she talks about both Andrias and herself in the same breath. "A thousand years of suffering, of burying your feelings, of hating yourself..." Anne's eyes are trained on the King as she glows a color similar to his own skin, "that must have been hard."

Learning to love yourself is a hard task, and can't be completed alone. It is through our connections, it is through the impact that others have on us, it is through the love we are shown, and it is through our ability to accept that love that we learn how to love ourselves. Similarly, this is how we learn how to grow.

[chimivx]

Hiii I hope you’re having a great day!!!! ❤️

I was wondering if you think any of your characters in your different series would be friends? If they were placed in the same timeline, same place, same time? I know we have some crossovers already (plumverse) and some age differences lol but for example, would 21 year old nmwid faden be friends with 21 year old home run isla? would 42 year old nmwid soobin be friends with 42 year old taste felix?

I hope you pick up what I’m putting down and this doesn’t sound silly haha

HI THIS IS THE COOLEST ASK EVER OMFG.

Context: PLUMVERSE <3

21 yo. NMWID Faden and 21 yo. h;r Isla!? BESTIES. but not in real good way… they’d hang, they’d shoot the shit, i’m sure they’d make out, but addiction is in the room and they would enable the shit out of each other! in terms of vibes and energy… i feel they’d get each other, they’re both between two guys, one who may not be a good option for them and the other the love of their life… distant parents who didn’t supervise them too much… HELL YEAH. best friends!!! (but someone help them eek)

42 yo. NMWID Soobin and 42 yo. Taste Felix!? Anon, you know my people better than I do!? What do these two have in common??? Emotional maturity and a therapist. Felix is a therapist. Soobin is told numerous times he should’ve been a therapist over a lawyer. Now, while Soobin takes on four kids at once, Felix only has to raise one. Every weekend. Except in the summers, for the entire month of July. Until he’s fifteen. Then Felix has to raise him until he’s moved out. These two both live the sober life for the sake of their partners, but I could totally see them going out to dinner, having a guys night, discussing philosophical things that Faden and Hyunjin just don’t get. Oh geez. Now I love this pair.

Beomgyu and Chan (NMWID), if these two were the same age at the same time in the same bar, look out. Father and son, yes. But, my bestie said, what if they were friends. Beomgyu literally copy and pasted with Chan, his son is him reincarnated and Beomgyu still walks the earth. I can totally see these two getting into trouble, causing problems throughout their hometowns, and like Faden and Isla… enabling each other!

If Yeonjun (NMWID) went to Nasara University at the same time as the current class… Yeonjun would be rubbing elbows with San (NFW). Funny that San is super close to Aurora, right!? Yeonjun and San would legendary. San is already pretty legendary on his own, but add in the OG charm master??? God bless the students at Nasara if they ever encounter that duo.

Keeho (NFW) would be bestie bestie with Dina (Haven/Taste) <3

Mina (NFW) and Jade (Haven/Taste)…. I just… Yeah.

This one gets me…. Yunho (NFW) and Taehyun (NMWID)…. Big brained idiots. Has the girl of his dreams and FUCKS IT UP. For what reason? DOES HE EVEN KNOW? Separation between them and their best friend, losing their soulmate, almost having kids with them, coming up with plot points and plans without even trying, keeping shit hidden even though they want to spill it all, envious of another man, treats their soulmate like shit because they’re pissed off and know that she’s in love with someone else. They’re both actually intellectually smart, but they both burn themselves out in their own ways. Taehyun is an addict, Yunho is an ADHD’er who can’t balance his life properly. They both love hard and deep, they crave their person, but they let her go. And it’s a matter of time before she comes back… but are they willing to let her back in? The question is- would they be friends? Yes. Yep. Definitely. I would pay to hear these two discuss their girls.

Changbin (Haven/Taste) and Yuna (NFW) <3 Two lovers who fight for their friends, with slippery tongues, but huge hearts. These two would get along so well, they’re such emotional pillars for their friends, it would only make sense for them to come together at some point to recharge with someone who understands.

Ryujin (NFW) and Jungkook (NMWID)… Do I need to explain? ‘You’re being an asswipe, get your shit together and stand up straight.’ That would leave both their mouths.

Beomgyu (NMWID) and Tori (NFW) <3 Listen. Both of them at, maybe, 19. Okay??? Beomgyu before his life upturns, and Tori right as she begins her life with ITZ… I wanna be in the room where it happens 🎶… The chaos? The fun? The energy? The drinking challenges? The hysterical bickering? It’s so sibling coded it’s atrocious!! (Tori and Chan get along very well…)

I love you anon 🥺🫶 If I think up any more I will 100% make a post! Thank you for this super fun ask!!!! <3

[gokubrain]

hello!!! so i am the person who asked you about cell arch, and the one who hasn't seen the buu arch,,, well l'm happy to say that that's no longer true! I finally watched it and I have SO MUCH TO SAY ITS CRAZY!!! I don't even know where to start or how to make this comprehensible but l'll try my best, im also really nervous but it's ok:-) this is definitely gonna be very chaotic and i apologise in advance because I don't know how to write so l'lI just be saying everything that comes to mind,,,

SO! let me just start this out by saying that YOU WERE SO RIGHT!!!! this arch literally changed my entire perspective on how I view kakavege and it was so good I watched the whole thing in like 4 days xD, I also needed like a whole week to process everything that happened and go through all my notes to compose all my thoughts xDD but ok, here we go,,,

firstly, I just couldn't believe at first how vegeta was like, actually nicer?? like when they went to the tournament he was actually like hanging out with everyone else? this might seem like not much but to me that was so crazy because up until that point, vegeta would always be standing somewhere in the corner angrily and try not to associate with anyone. but now when goku asked him if he wants to go watch goten and trunks fight he agreed and when trunks wins vegeta puts his hand on gokus shoulder??? since when??? that's was like the first big change I noticed and I just couldn't get over it at all, it just seemed insane that vegeta would suddenly be acting not as aggressively. AND THEN THE FAMOUS SCENE!!! where goku and vegeta just communicate without actually saying any words??? | was just speechless, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I think I was still underestimating just how gay this arch is gonna get.

then vegeta not wanting goku to leave with kaioshin because they were supposed to fight in the tournament??? like him just saying that all he wants to do is fight goku and that that's the only reason he even joined??? man I love that scene so much.

then when they are on babidis spaceship it's just very cute how they both trust each other to be able to defeat the enemies,and then when vegeta gets impatient of waiting for the next opponent to show up, he gets angry and wants to destroy the ship, and then goku grabs his arm and tells him to calm down, then they just look into each other's eyes for a long time and OF COURSE, vegeta calms down,, that was so crazy man,,,

god i don't know if this is a normal way of writing this, like l'm just kinda writing things that I liked in the arch and not an actual review, I don't know what l'm doing really but l'm probably just overthinking xD

ok so now we're getting to the good bit😃

vegeta turns Majin ON PURPOSE??? and he only cares about goku?? And when babidi tries to control him to kill other people he just, refuses??? is vegeta really that gay that even mind powers simply don't work on him????

and the fight itself???? ITS SO UNBELIEVABLY GAY!!!! they hold hands so much man!!! and that one scene where vegeta pins goku to the wall with the rings??? i couldn't believe my eyes xDD

and now here's the thing, l'm not very good at writing so I don't know how to structure this well but I wanna talk about the scene where Vegeta knocks goku out and decides to go fight buu,

in my first attempt of writing this I just straight up described the entire scene and i feel like that's just extremely too long and im just gonna assume that everyone knows that scene and not gonna worry about it anymore,,,

that scene literally made me understand kakavege,,, and it sounds a bit silly but it really did, so here we go

in that scene vegeta literally says that he doesn't care if his family and the entire earth dies, and then, goku says that he doesn't believe him, and that he knows he still has good in his heart and vegeta just looks at him for so long, and I think that's when he finally realised how much of a mistake he had made, like do you know what I mean?? i don't know how to explain this well enough so l'm just gonna say it, when goku and vegeta first fought, goku speared him and gave him a second chance. later in the frieza arch when vegeta is dying he tells goku ever since he was little he always had this one path in life: being evil and killing people, and being with frieza didn't help, he made him what he was, an evil killing machine with no remorse, nobody ever even gave vegeta a chance to be anything else than evil, that's all he knew,,, except for goku, he saw the good in his heart and gave him the opportunity to change and be on a different path, and even now, when vegeta turned majin and is at his lowest, after everything he's done and all the people he has hurt, goku still believes in him and gives him another chance once again, and right in that moment, when he's looking at goku, he realises how much goku has done for him, how he always believed in him when nobody else did, and that's when he decides, he's gonna finally repay goku for all the things he has done for him, that's why he knocked him out, because it's finally time for him to start fighting for other people, not just himself,,,

and so now we have arrived at possibly the gayest scene in all dragon ball: vegetas speech before fighting buu!!! (i was gonna put the whole clip here but apparently you can't do that xD)

first of all, goku WAS someone who would get on your nerves????? I cannot get over this, he's literally admitting he doesn't get annoyed by goku anymore this is crazy, and I just really like the line "after you ended up saving my life, you died on me"🥺 i also can't get over the "have a good, long sleep" line!!! it just sounds so🥺 he's saying like, you've done so much for me, now it's my time to do something selfless for you,,, it's so good man!!!!! i had a mental breakdown the first time I saw that😩😩

BUT THATS NOT ALL!!!

the episode where vegeta dies is called "for those whom he loves, vegeta perishes”, and at the end of the episode when he's about to die he's saying his final goodbye and he says,,, "farewell! bulma,, trunks,„ and you, kakarot!"

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???? so basically what they're telling me is that vegeta is dying for those who he loves and then he lists those people and he includes goku as well!!???! so he just basically confirmed that he loves goku,,, cool😎

god ok I have to say this, I actually cried when vegeta died ×DD I feel so embarrassed to even admit that men!!😩😩 it's the combination of vegeta FINALLY HUGGING TRUNKS!!!, and vegeta literally flinching and looking like he's holding back tears when picolo told him he's not gonna be able to see goku after he dies,,, like I know he's obviously not actually dead for real but still,,, it genuinely made me sob xD i just really fucking liked that whole scene ok??? XDD

OK I THINK THATS ALL FOR NOW!!!

jesus I wrote so much xD in conclusion, thank you so much for encouraging me to watch this arch!!!! if you haven't it would have definitely taken me a lot longer to actually do it and l'm so glad I watched it!!! it genuinely changed my entire perspective on how I view kakavege and it just brought so much joy!!!

also, I already watched fusion reborn and,,, I HAVE EVEN MORE TO SAY ABOUT THAT THEN THIS!!!!!! i literally could analyse every second of screen time that vegeta and goku get together in great detail, so because of that l'm not going to do it here and maybe write another one of these just about the movie.

and if it wasn't clear, EVERYONE SHOULD WATCH THE BUU ARCH IF THEY HAVEN'T ALREADY!!!!!💜

theres a lot here to process and respond to (not complaining i love dbz i love hearing & talking about it i just have adhd) so i’m just gonna touch on a few things u said :3

for starters, i wanted to talk about this thing u said:

“[…] when vegeta turned majin and is at his lowest, after everything he's done and all the people he has hurt, goku still believes in him and gives him another chance once again, and right in that moment, when he's looking at goku, he realises how much goku has done for him, how he always believed in him when nobody else did […]”

this is it man you GET IT. you have figured out exactly what kakavege is at its very core. this concept is the foundation of this ship.. goku has always seen good within vegeta. thats it, at its simplest explanation, that IS kakavege.

it takes so long for vegeta to grasp this, for him to understand that goku sees within him something worth salvaging, because literally no one has ever had that sort of faith in vegeta before. there is nothing quite like being certain you are damned and evil and unsaveable only to have the most amazing and kind person alive believe you are good. its something vegeta doesn’t even deserve frankly, after everything he’s done not only in general but everything he’s done to goku as well���

and of course he knows that, that’s the point of his sacrifice vs. buu… definitely during the fight with goku he realizes he needs to do something to atone, and though dying did absolutely nothing (so fitting with his theme btw), he still felt as though he had to do this as a sorry to goku, even going so far as to namedrop goku in his final words before dying. idk idk i feel pretty normal about it i think

also , no scene will ever top the you are number one speech for me. ever. ever ever ever. its PEAK its peak dbz its peak kakavege its peak anime. it fuckin rules.

to me its the moment vegeta realized his feelings for goku, how all this time he shouldve been adoring him and admiring his strength instead of lamenting him and dedicating his life & fighting career to ending him … aahgg

TL;DR: buu arc kakavege <3

[whoiserenity]

LOVE TO HATE ME ~ Rafe Cameron x Female Reader ~ CHAPTER ONE

contains: alcohol, bad behavior, smoking, fighting, unhealthy jealousy.

trope: enemies to lovers.

credits: introduction is from Outer Banks, season 1, episode 1.

a/n: this is gonna be a mini series and updates are prob gonna be slow.

The Outer Banks, Paradise on Earth.

It's the sort of place where you either have two jobs or two houses.

Two tribes, one island.

All right, so Figure Eight, the rich side of the island. Home of the Kooks. So, guess where we don't live.

And then the south side or the cut. Home of the working class who make a living busing tables, washing yachts, running charters. The natural habitat of... drumroll, please...

...The Pogues.

That's us. Pogues, pogies, the throwaway fish. Lowest member of the food chain. Okay. So the downside of Pogue life is we're ignored and neglected. But the upside of Pogue's life? We're ignored and neglected, which means we do whatever we want, whenever we want.

---‐--------------------------------------------------

One of the things you do daily in Pogue life. Surfing. JJ and John B were betting that whoever surfs the big wave coming in would get cash. Kiara, me, and Pope stayed on shore.

"5 bucks." John B said.

"Seriously, dude? 5 bucks for a big wave?" JJ raised an eyebrow at John B's words.

"I say 10 bucks!" Pope yelled at them from the shore.

"10? No. 20!" Kiara said.

"20?" JJ looked at John B who shook his head. "No? Okay. I say 50." JJ suggested as me, Kiara, and Pope agree.

"Where you gonna get 50 bucks?!" I yelled. JJ slammed his hands together before pointing to Kie.

Kiara's head whipped side to side before pointing to herself. "Me?!"

"Yes, you." JJ replied.

Kiara rolled her eyes before taking her wallet from her pocket and taking out $50 dollars and placing it in front of her.

"Alright, guys, the waves coming!" Pope shouted.

"Man, don't get your panties in a twist when I beat you!" JJ smirked at John B as he prepared himself for the wave.

John B chuckled before replying, "Let's see about that." Once the wave came they surfed it, and surprisingly they both managed to.

JJ looked at John B who smirked at him. "Whoever gets back on shore faster gets the dollar!" Pope laughed, so did me and Kiara as we watched JJ and John B surf back to shore, clearly trying to beat the other.

We cheered as they neared shore, now running to the cash.

JJ landed his hands on the cash first but John B catched up and put his hand on top of JJ's.

"Yo, dude, I laid on it first!" JJ exclaimed, shoving his damp hair away from his face.

John B chuckled and freed JJ's hand. "Alright. It's fair. But next time, I'm laying hands on a hundred." We chuckled at John B's words.

"Well, lookie here." A male voice called out.

We all turned to look at where it came from, only to see Rafe, with his petty little minions, Topper and Kelce.

Each of our smiles faltered at the sight of them. Kooks. People who think they own the island. We all had hatred for them ever since we were born. But my hatred for Rafe stood out.

There was just something about him and his face that tempted me to shove his head down into the ocean and keep it there until he couldn't breathe.

"What are you doing on our side of the island?" Rafe stopped in front of us, squinting his eyes at specifically me.

"Last time I checked, anyone can hang on the beach," JJ replied, glaring daggers at Rafe.

"Last time I checked you live in the cut." Kelce laughed when JJ was about to pounce on him but John B stopped him.

"Rafe, if you've got nothing nice to say, I suggest you leave." John B said, his tone calm but demanding.

Rafe cackled at his words, looking at Topper and Kelce who were snickering. "Oh come on, John B, are you literally kicking me out of my own side of the island?"

"You don't own the island, Rafe," I said, my tone annoyed and aggressive. He turned to me.

He rolled his eyes. "And you do?" He took a step closer to me. "You wasted your beauty by hanging out with... them.." He sneered, looking at JJ, John B, and Pope.

"Back off, man." Pope pushed Rafe away from me, causing him to stumble back and almost fall. Rafe looked shocked for a second before glaring at Pope and walking towards him, landing a punch on his face.

Kiara, and I gasped as John B and JJ tried to pull Pope out of the fight, meanwhile, Kelce and Topper were cheering for Rafe.

Rafe tackled Pope onto the sand and continued to abuse the living shit out of his face. He landed a few punches before Pope did to him. After Pope landed a punch on Rafe's face, John B and JJ took the time to pull him away from Rafe.

Pope glared at Rafe as he returned it. "Come on, Pope, let's go." John B glared at Rafe before walking away, us following behind.

"We're not done yet!" Rafe yelled as he got up from kneeling on the ground.

We finally got back to the Chateau, grabbing ice for the bruise on Pope's head. Kiara came back from the kitchen, handing Pope the cold compress as he took it and placed it on his bruise, muttering something under his breath.

I followed behind Kiara and sat down beside JJ, sighing. "Rafe's definitely not gonna let that go." I said as they all turned to me.

"What- what do you mean?" John B asked as I looked at him. "It's midsummers tomorrow and Pope has to help his dad deliver food there. If Rafe sees him, he's dead."

They all exchanged looks, knowing that my point was right. John B sighed and leaned back on his seat, Kiara looked down and JJ bit the inside of his cheek.

"We-ll?" Pope uttered, his voice voice breaking (he's not crying.)

"Alright, here's the plan." JJ propped his elbows on his knees and put his fingertips together. "You..." He turned to Pope. "You'll stay home, jus' tell your pops a lil' white lie, that you're sick and won't be able to help, then me and John B'll cover for you." JJ looked at John B.

Pope, Kiara, and me turned to John B. He sort of became the leader of the group because he was the most responsible out of the five of us, so we usually seek his approval if we ever suggest anything, specially when it comes to JJ.

John B sighed and took turns looking at the four of us before speaking.

"Fine."

Hi everyone! I'm back! It's been a month and I've been focusing on school but I took my time and finished the first episode of my Rafe Cameron mini series fanfic!

For everyone who has been waiting for it, here it is! Thank you so much for being patient!

That's all! ENJOY!

[weatheredcoffeecup]

@aeriscallanga

Hi! May I request a personality/written ship for Ateez, Enhypen, Seventeen, Stray Kids, and TXT with short explanation each? Thanks!

Hello hello friend!! Thank you for your patience ♡ I just want to say you seem like such a vibe? Your style is so cool just by reading it I'm OBSESSED

Anyways here's your ship!! I hope you like hehe

₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡₊˚⊹♡˚⊹♡₊˚⊹

In ateez I ship you with... Mingi!

Are you kidding me? I imedietly knew it'd be him. He would be so in awe of your style. You'd go shopping together and any outfit you put together he would just babble like an idiot over how incredible you look. "Look at him! Isn't he the coolest?" Like yes mingi we get it. He'd never stop talking about you. On days off he would plan a hole day at the park. Starting with a picnic then taking infamous amounts of photos of you two together.

In enyphen I ship you with... Heeseung!

Heeseung is 100% a homebody so taking him out to do stuff may be a fight but with some convincing he'd finally give in. Heeseung would remember something you pointed out one time at a store and go back to buy it and suprise you with it. He would admire how dependable you were but would make sure you know he's there for you too. He'd always make sure you're doing okay and if something happened, I'm sure a delivery food dinner date and video games would be in the agenda to cheer you up. He'd always buy you guys matching accessories and make sure everyone knew it too. Not in an annoying way but if someone asked he'd never let the opportunity to mention you get away.

In seventeen I ship you with... Wonwoo!

You'd be sleeping in one morning and wake up to this gentle giant bringing you fresh hot coffee (or whatever it is you prefer) along with a home-cooked breakfast. He'd wake you up with some forehead kisses then crawl back into bed just to fall asleep again. Anytime he catches you drawing he just sits silently admiring your talent. He'd always want to ask you to draw a portrait of you two but would be too scared to bother you with it, so one day you'd come home to a blushy shy Wonwoo and his best attempt at drawing you guys. It hangs above your bed now along with a few other pieces you've done.

In stray kids I ship you with... Bang Chan!

Chan would always listen to what you have to say. A new topic you've found interesting, your current concerns, any silly little joke, he's right there for it. This man wouldn't let anything pass by. If someone looks at you they'd probably be gone within seconds from him staring from behind you. Protective mode ON. You are his #1 priority. But he's also going to give you all the hoodies to snuggle up in when he's gone or write you a song. I imagine you two dancing around in the kitchen at 1 am baking cookies and creating loving memories. This man would spoil you to the ends of the earth. Just the perfect boyfriend honestly I could go on forever.

In TXT I ship you with... Yeonjun!

Yeonjun, my dear boy. Get ready to have fun non stop. He always has something planned to do with you. Karaokes, dancing outside when it's raining, shopping, going on nice dinner dates, taking painting classes together- etc etc. You would mention doing something and he'd get so excited. "Absolutely!!! Lets go!!! Right now!!" And that's how you found yourself looking at pandas on a Thursday afternoon. Whenever he's out and about and sees something that reminds you of him he would take a picture to send you. It's honestly adorable to thing this "scary rapper" would burst into the biggest smile at just the thought of you. Also you two being literally the baddest ass couple?? Heads would be TURNING on the streets. Your lowkey famous in your town from how well you two dress.

I hope you like it! Have a good day 🌸

[unknownfrom34]

On Dreaming Clouds of Nine

It continues from here and it will be in @muzzleroars honor as I am writing this. In short summery: Lucifer takes them to his home, they then fell asleep on literal clouds in place of cloud nine.

It is somewhat inspired by a lazy butt part of myself who decides one day will be the day to sleep all day long until becoming more active at night lol.

Enjoy the inevitable cuteness, everybody.

The first top on his back hang on tight; despite being literally on fire, Raphael and Uriel were still able to hang onto their elder brother, a co creator of them as Lucifer told them that he preferred as is. (Elder Brother words is somewhat new to him. He was put in charge of caring for them after all.) while he held Michael and Gabriel in his arms as they both had wrapped their arms around his neck and closed their eyes tightly (on the exception of Gabriel occasionally peaking to see the darkness around him with a few stars sprinkled here and there as its still in progress) as they flew across the Ninth Sphere.

They flew away from their place of birth and into the darkness all around them with the flames burning so bright of love. Word has already spread to the angels as they harken to Lucifer's voice filled with celebration of the birth of the four new Archangels. They all rejoiced with such joy.

And beyond that Ninth, they kept flying across the cosmos and seeing the other Spheres of their home. From the ninth to the first out of nine worlds visible only to the eyes of the divine, they were given a tour of each other, the beauty and the creativity of their Father. Lucifer had decided that Gabriel and Michael earlier that they will be warriors of faith and due to train on Mars, the Fifth Sphere of Warriors of Faith. As for the other two, one will act as a scholar will fall onto Uriel and the Healer will be Raphael's role.

A good decision, Lucifer sensed from the Lord, is a good decision.

Before long, duration of this tour; the four newly born cherubs asked him all sorts of questions on these various topics. How can the balls of Heaven (Spheres) can stay a float without strings? When will they be able to fly like him? Can they create something like the Father? How will they eat?

Questions after questions will pile on without end but with confidence, there will also be an amount of limitless patience he constantly processed.

He answers them, with each one, there will be an answer on the Lord's behalf and his own. As they walked town the path of the First Sphere: The Moon.

Once lifeless lunar planet, planted with seeds and turned into a lush green paradise with endless nights with the Earth taking the Moon's place. Earth long ago was a little bit lacking on life, light brown soil still there and above the crystal blue oceans as they looked up at the endless skies of the cosmos and the galaxy.

"We are meant to bring the light into the darkness?" Gabriel asked, looking at his elder brother. "How will we do that, Lucifer?"

"Only He knows the plan for us all, Gabriel." Lucifer answered as he looked down at the Eagle Archangel, his halo of blue glowed softly in the dark side of the moon. "Even though, I don't even know it."

"Why don't you know it, Lu?" Michael nicknamed him, "I want to know!" He bounced a little, impatient is one of the traits of a childish cherub. "When I am the new chief prince; I would ask Him myself! Like you, Lu."

Lucifer laughed lightly, nicknaming the current Prince of Heaven himself but he must admit that this Michael is confident yet still has yet to learn. "Maybe you should, Michael, but you are still a feisty lion cub that likes to bite. You will grow and mature."

"Hey!"

Gabriel chuckled to himself at Michael's chagrin, hand over his non-existent mouth. Lucifer then looked at the cherubs and somewhat knows that the tour is nearing to a close and these little ones have yet to be clothed.

The light of his flames fluttered gently as he turned towards the Earth once more. "I know that a view is amazing but we must be heading back to the Ninth Sphere now." he looked amongst his brothers, expectedly. "It is now time to put on robes."

"What are 'robes,' Lucifer?" Uriel looked up to the brightest angel as they turned from the planet and began to walk off towards the birch trees, fire trailing behind them due to Lucifer.

"An article of items that you will wear and change everyday." Lucifer gently placed a hand on the back of Raphael's head and giving him a gentle push to go ahead of them. "If you worn them too many a day, they will start to smell." Lucifer turned over to Uriel as they stopped before Lucifer kneeled down and picked up Michael and Gabriel up to bring them both on his shoulders as he looked up. "I will explain more about the helmets you will soon be receiving from the Father after this."

"Wait, helm-?" "Hold my hands, Raphael and Uriel."

The other Archangels held onto his hand as the flames glow brighter, Gabriel and Michael had noticed this and began to say. "Lucifer-?" but then in a flash, they were somewhere else with a frighten yelp with shut eyes but before long; they opened up their eyes and saw their surroundings as the other two were put down to the floor with their siblings.

"This is my home or rather our home now." Lucifer spoke as the four cherub Archangels turned their heads to look up at him. "The Lord had often made sure that we will have the utmost comfortable sleep as possible." Lucifer placed his hands together as he looked at them below before turning towards the entrance to another room, one that has a balcony.

"Our home?" Raphael looked around as he was lost in his own little world while Uriel hold onto his hand and drag him along gently, following along with the others. "I have robes for you all to wear, its not much but I know that these will have to do."

"Why don't you wear any?"

Lucifer remain silent for a moment.

"Michael, if I do, they would just burn instantly." Lucifer spoke up, looking at Michael. "I can try but it will always be the same result in the end. But for now, we need-" A distant boom was heard from a distance. Immediately, Lucifer turned over and hugged all four of them to his chest and wings furled toward and covered the startled Cherubs. From under his wings, they felt the floor under them rumbled violently with a bits of debris of stone had fallen from above as Lucifer shut his eyes tightly.

It lasted for three minutes but the rumbling finally stopped. Lucifer waited for a moment until he opened his eyes and lifted his head up to look around and then to the Archangels who were shaken up from the exprience.

"Is everyone alright?" He immediately asked them as his wings unfurled and came to rest on his back as they fold up. They were holding onto each other as they looked up at the brightest angel and nodded, heads jolting.

"What was that?" Raphael asked him.

"One of the unfinished stars had exploded." Lucifer explained as he sat upright. "The Father was worried that He will get injured if he tries to dispose them so there was no other choice but to wait them out."

"For how long?" Uriel questioned hurriedly.

Lucifer got back on his feet, better to survey the damage it had wrought around their home. "Precisely, in the next eight or nine years. So, we will have to get use to them for a while until then. They were unfinished and unstable but easy to predict when they will go off."

"Like bombs?" "Like bombs." Lucifer looked at Michael once again as he continued to walk towards the blanket and then parts it with his hand, before standing aside to let them past by in a single line before he himself enters the room.

Within minutes, each Archangel were given an article of robe clothing, Gabriel has a white robe with a blue bow on it, Raphael's a light brown with a belt and loops with a slight neutral shade of the brown color, Uriel's white as well but with an tinted orange cloak over his shoulders and lastly, Michael wore a white robe with a gray shirt over it, both have sleeves and cord tied around his waist with tassels.

Lucifer helps them get dress during this, with little trouble one of them will be having and it was solved within minutes. They were then led to the chamber where it was the most comfy for a dreaming angel to have in their sleep. Clouds in forms of a soft surface made from water that then evaporated into cotton, and cotton is soft and squishy to the touch. "Its so soft." Raphael chirped as he rubbed his cheek on the cloud, a yawn left him. "They are very soft. Very soft indeed." Uriel added as he had sat down on one of himself, he sinks down into it as he sat with his legs crossed and soon laid down onto it.

"But we weren't tired yet, besides, how do we know its night here?" Michael looked up at Lucifer who was looking at the angels making themselves well-adjustingly comfortable on their beds. "All of Heaven is in darkness at the moment, but I will wake you all up when I woke up as well." Lucifer patted his protege's shoulder a little.

Michael looked up to his elder brother and one wing on his head flapped a little down, tip pointing at the floor as his eyes colored in royal orange. "What if we don't wake up?" he worriedly asked as he was picked up and then he was placed onto his respective cloud bed. Lucifer's gaze was unchanged but from what Michael could understand as he absorbed the expression on his face plate.

Reassurance.

"Then follow the Light," He finally answered after a minute, "A light in the darkness, I will be here." he continued before petted his head, being careful of the flames of Michael's own Light burning within him.

Lucifer then stands up and then left the room, a trail of fire he left behind him as he gently pushes the tarp away and falling behind him. Michael looked down at the cloud he was sitting on before he turned his attention right away to his brothers.

Gabriel had already grabbed and then pulled the cloud over his form like a blanket and then the flames dimmed a little as he closed his eyes. Back heaved up and down with a little flames grow and then decreased. He had fallen into sleep and then looked over to the other two.

Raphael had already done the same and has already gone to sleep with Uriel following soon afterwards.

Alone. Only one awake in this room, alone with thoughts.

Michael looked around the room around them, exactly it's fifty-percent of the area covered in soft faux fur and soft chiffon, silk, and velvet with clouds sitting nicely on the marbled floor. A gentle breeze came by as he stood still.

A shiver up his spine but soon he threw himself onto the cloud with his grabbed a handful of the evaporated water-cotton and pulled it over him in order to protect himself from the cold air.

He shakes for a moment until the warmth returned. His head, shoulder and the rest of him had laid on the surface of such softness and easement he had ever felt for the first time. Huh. No wonder why they found these clouds soft. His brothers like them, now he likes it.

He wanted to sat back up but his body sinks deep into the bed and eye lids of every single eye are fluttering to a close. A yawn left him as he dug his hands under his head and soon pushed the cloud into a lump for his head to rest on.

Maybe a nap on a soft surface of a cloud wouldn't be so bad afterall.

[thegeminisage]

ok tng update time. this one is four episodes because i let it get away from me. i at some point watched "manhunt," then we caught "the emissary" and "peak condition" together, and finally i sped my way through "shades of gray" earlier today

manhunt: not even majel barrett could save this one. not only did deanna not take a stand against her mother like she did in the last lwaxana troi ep, she went back to acting as though she never had at all. so much for my favorite deanna moment ever. i'm sorry women

riker carrying the suitcase WAS funny. i love how down he is to do literally anything. he is rapidly becoming one of my favorites he's finally coming into his own

husband hunting bc of menopause bad. holodeck WORSE. combine them and i am in agony

the jokes about how ugly those stasis aliens were were also kind of unfunny. the twist about them being assassins and lwaxana knowing all along because she's psychic WOULD have been funny if 1. they hadn't established her telepathy was off and 2. she hadn't been so annoying this episode

i hate when she scolds people for "having naughty thoughts" when it was established last episode that she's making that shit up or at the very least sharply exaggerating it to embarrass them and then it WORKS TO EMBARRASS THEM. shouldn't everyone in the room by now know that she's just inflating her own ego...

anyway it was unwatchably bad.

the emissary: this one was ALMOST good. they got really close. i really liked the half-klingon woman when she was hanging out with deanna...they had genuine chemistry and they should have kissed about it. unfortunately all her scenes with worf were INSUFFERABLE

like, this woman DESPISES klingons. she doesn't say one thing about them that isn't completely derogatory the entire episode. she hates her own klingon half, she hates other klingons, why on EARTH was she 1. put in charge of this mission 2. made to work with WORF even after he asked picard to pick someone else?

like, worf literally spent the entire episode trying to do his job, and she kept bringing up their past drama so she could provoke him into fucking her

and then when he tries to """do the right thing""" by marrying her (WHICH MAKES NO SENSE WHEN COMPARED WITH PREVIOUS LORE...BUT WHATEVER...) she's like haha no silly that's what those silly backward awful KLINGONS do, but EYE am a way more evolved human

and then we don't examine that at all ever.

like, she could have been a fascinating character when foiled with worf - both of them are klingons who operate in a world of humans and feel isolated and othered as a result, but she HATES her klingon half and worf wants to connect more closely with his own klingon heritage. they could have been good for each other but instead she was super annoying and then just left.

i DID like the scene at the end though where worf got dressed in full klingon captain regalia and bluffed his way into captaincy of a klingon warship. GOOD for him. that was fun and sexy of him and for once i didn't mind them using the woman as eye candy.

THAT SAID IF SHE HATES KLINGONS SO MUCH WHY IS SHE THE ONE ABOARD THAT SHIP. IT MAKES NO SENSE. anyway it missed the fucking mark. i loved the poker game though

peak condition: i loved this one. it was so funny and full of shenanigans and hijinks. this is actually the most i have ever liked wesley, who used his dumb annoying kid persona as a cover to CHEAT a metaphorical kobayashi maru. i genuinely unironically thought it was great. eveyrbody was rolling their eyes at him bc he had to go back for his experiment and then meanwhile he's loading antimatter onto the hathaway with a PERFECT fucking poker face behind their backs

i loved the little npc this episode, he was such a ham. he truly was doing the most he was so funny

best plot twist ever is when worf fakes the first enemy ship and then the second enemy ship is the real one. the comedic timing of that was HILARIOUS and riker finding a way to make it work even when that strategy guy said it was impossible bc he had too much charisma was great

my one sour note was pulaski setting data up to do that video game match. she realized her mistake and apologized but i still wanted to kill her. i would have hated it less had data volunteered on his own, because i DID like his little arc about learning sometimes he will make mistakes even if his solution to beating the guy in the end felt like a little bit of a copout. anyway, stellar episode despite that little hiccup, i wish tng was that fun all the time

shades of gray: actually much less horrific than i expected given its clip show nature. some of the clips were ones i liked and the ones i fucking hated i felt no shame in speeding up or even skipping through entirely (i can't believe they wanted us to watch tasha yar die again LMAOOO and that fake girl on the holodeck like come ON).

that said, the part before the clipshow was very VERY charming. riker living it up while everyone else is having kittens about his impending doom, his determination to keep both his dignity and sense of humor while facing death...unironically some of the best riker content hiding in that episode. i feel like i got to watch 12 minutes of cool riker stuff and then a few cool clips.

i guess that was pulaski's last appearance? rip girl, you tried and again women i am so sorry.

anyway, that's it for season 2. we literally fucking made it. tomorrow night we're starting season 3 and doing every episode together until we hit three duds in a row lol.

[teenytinyjournalqueer]

I know I told you I’d stop hating him, but I can’t. I can’t stop hating the person that gets the life with you that I would do absolutely ANYTHING for. The worst part is he doesn’t even care or see the absolute honor being bestowed on him. He can literally do anything he wants and it will forever be okay. He can treat you like absolute shit (which he does literally ALL the time, and yet somehow it’s always okay), he can hang out with you as much and for as long as he likes, hell he even gets to live with and wake up next to you every morning and even that’s okay!

When we hang out (even if we are in your city) your family calls you 100x an hour to “check on you” or make you feel guilty for wanting to hang out with me and not being with them to be their servant, but you spent a literal WEEK with him halfway across the fucking country and NO ONE was allowed to call you for the entire week, NOT ONCE. You’ve told me since day one of us being together that you were too private of a person for anyone to ever know we are/were dating, but anyone/everyone can know about him and that you two are dating.

I will always put you first no matter what is going on in my life, but with him you aren’t even a priority. Don’t worry I’ll do my very best to never let on that I would take his place in an instant, that I’m not sure if I will EVER be able to stop hating him. You said “You can’t love him while I hate him!” And if I’m being honest, that is FINE with me. I don’t want you to love him, not really. Dating him is one thing, but loving him, that’s a whole other. He gets EVERYTHING!!!! Why the FUCK does he deserve the gift of your love too?! He literally does NOTHING to earn it! He was just lucky enough to be born with a fucking penis so he’s “family approved”. Meanwhile, I have to fight tooth and nail, trying to move heaven and earth to even get to spend 5 minutes with you in person.

You keep telling me I’m bad with money because all the insurance money from my apartment fire is gone now, but the truth is I spent almost every last penny I had for that amazing six days we spent together. I didn’t tell you, and I hope you never find out but I did. To me it was worth it, because as MUCH as you deny it, I’d bet my life on the fact that we’ll never get to spend time in person together ever again. You say we’ll always find a way but we both know that’s just a lot of talk to make us both feel better. Your parents will make sure we never see each other ever again!!! You almost killed yourself just trying to survive those six days, especially since I need so much help. You, your happiness, and your safety will ALWAYS be my top priority.

You are hanging out with him in about three hours for the entire day. He gets to see you two weeks in a row, and you two are even going to OUR Thai place. I know you and I can never go back because of the lack of accessibility, but it still FUCKING hurts. He’ll get the cute candle lit dinner with you, and because it’s him it will of course be better than when we went.

Sometimes, I want time with you that’s just OURS. I want places that only WE go to. But no matter what he always manages to cast his terrible fucking shadow over everything and anything we do. There wasn’t a single moment when you weren’t asleep that he didn’t manage to worm his way into every other sentence of our conversations. I’m not sure how but his name kept coming up. I made sure never to mention it even once, and yet every sentence or at most every other somehow led back to him and how brilliant and amazing he is. I don’t even know how that happens. I’m not sure exactly how to put into words exactly how much that hurts, to be trying to spend what little time we are allowed together in person just living in the moment with you, and soak up all the amazingness that is you, only to have our little love bubble burst by his ever looming presence every two minutes. I somehow doubt my name EVER comes up in any conversation you have with him nearly that often, if at all. It KILLS me that he claims to “love you” but continues to treat you like you aren’t even important in his life! Never mind that you should be the MOST important thing in his life!!!

You love to tell me every time I make a mistake that “you’d never put up with any mistakes from a man!” And yet you’ve proven over and over that is a bold face lie. I mean maybe it’s not, maybe he’s not just any man, maybe there’s something that makes him special. I don’t know anymore. There must be something extraordinary about him, because I would bet my life that if push came to shove, I’d be the one who would have to leave.

Especially when you refused to tell me what/who you’d leave behind “if it stopped working” when you were talking to “her”. I know you always say that it’s my mental health that makes me think that he is more important than I am, and maybe I’d believe that if there had been one or two or maybe even a handful of instances that proved he WAS more important than me. But that’s not the case, it feels like there’s some new thing every day or every other that continues to prove that there is a hierarchy of people in your life and I am at the very bottom. Please, don’t get me wrong, I understand not being at the top, that much I get, but to be below HIM?! Someone who if he does have a hierarchy of people in his life, wouldn’t even have you on the LIST?!

You keep telling me that I listen to my emotions more than you and that my emotions lie to me. Maybe that was true in the beginning, but I’m having a harder time believing that as time goes on. Just like I’m having a harder time believing we stand any chance of actually being together. As much as I would move heaven and earth, walk across continents, and swim oceans to try to make that happen, it’s become obvious it’s out of my control. The worst part is, I’d do anything for you, and I’m pretty sure he wouldn’t even raise a finger to help you.

He likes you solely for your looks, it’s so superficial for him. I’ve told you this before. Your looks drew me in but who you are is the reason I stayed and will always stay. I never thought it would hurt dreaming about our future together, but it does now because I know no matter what I do, I’ll be lucky if I ever even get to see you in person again, never mind get the absolute HONOR of spending the rest of my time on this dumpster fire of a planet with you! Our future together is out of reach now, and there’s nothing either of us can do about it. The first domino has fallen and now it’s just a matter of time before I’m pushed out of your life completely and I have to watch your life with him pass me by via your social media posts. I will ALWAYS love you, no matter what. It just kills me that we’ll never get to be together, that the future we wanted, planned and dreamed about has gone up in a puff of smoke.

[dinsbeskar]

Okay my heart is healed and full again, this was absolutely adorable????

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck” he mumbled to himself, the air was so cold his breath came out in puffs. His fingers were red and raw, having insisted that he had no need for your gloves despite your protests. He'd be fine in his jeans and thick flannel, he had argued, but he'd regretted it mere seconds after getting atop the ladder to place these damned lights.

This whole bit, I'm dying, he's a prideful idiot, ofc he's cold but he'll fight through it 😂😂 I'm just picturing halbrand in flannel and jeans which uhhh yeah I might need a minute

He was The Dark Lord. The Deceiver. He had ripped elves apart with his bare hands. He had leveled cities. He had waited and bid his time for ages untold to bring his rule to bring the races of Middle Earth to their knees.

LMFAO WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY

literally a ridiculously powerful ethereal being, reduced to putting up Christmas lights with his bare hands, I love it so much!!! Where is he, I need him!!!

Why? He could wave his hand and make everyone think there were lights, decorations, a goddamn 12 foot Santa.

SHUT UP THIS IS SO FUNNY IM DYING

“Who the fuck even is Santa?” He mumbled to himself.

SHUT UP

I'm fucking dying, who tf even is Santa indeed 😂😂

You. You were the reason for this. The moment he laid eyes on you, he gave it all up. All ambition. All desire for power or control. All sense of immortality. All for you. He had yet to know if you felt the same, but he did know that you were his salvation. You were good, and you were pure and looking into your heart and soul. He realized that his search for perfection ended with you.

Oh goddddddd please me and who when?? Need me some fallen dark lord hanging my lights smh

And, if that meant hanging these stupid fucking lights, then so be it.

I'm fucking cackling, bc Xmas light hanging in our house is a fucking event, my sister and her partner do them and they're hilarious, shouting at each other while the neighbours watch, but it's all in jest

The amount of times we hear "I fucking hate christmas" is innumerable

It took him 20 more minutes and approximately 135 more ‘fucks’ before he he was done and walking back into your shop.

LMFAO BUT HE DID IT!!!

He shook his head, pressing his tongue against his teeth. “Nope. My family had too much…drama. Angst. Fighting.”

Pffffffft they did yeah, and who caused that??? Cheeky fuck.

“Would you, maybe, like…” You inhaled and looked up at him, the butterflies in his stomach exploding into fireworks, “Would you like to come over on Friday? We could order something to eat, I could make cookies, and I could show you my favorites.”

The butterflies exploding into fireworks is just gorgeous, I love this metaphor

And she's so nervous!!! Babe he would do anything for you and you haven't even kissed yet!!! You got him!!!

The way your teeth bit down on your tongue, the blush to your cheeks, how your features scrunched in preparation for his response, all this was kindling to a fire.

Kindling to a fire. Oh boy I love that too, gorgeous.

He watched as your breath caught in your chest. He had to fight the smirk that threatened to spread across his lips. He was a master manipulator, and it was taking all of his prowess to hide his true emotions at this moment.

God he sucks, I love him so much

“ Yeah, a weekend long sleepover. But... you know... just as friends.”

Mmhmm just friends. With benefits. And engagement rings, hopefully.

Despite his words, he couldn't help how his eyes traveled down to quickly glance at your soft, lush lips. Nor could he control how his mind wandered to how they might feel.

Oh god let them kiss!!! Smash them together like barbie dolls!!!

Fucks sake I'm head over heels for a dark lord who is so stupid down bad that he is hanging fucking Christmas lights for a girl he hasn't even kissed yet, that is true love right there

Perfection

"What if....?" Halbrand AU

Pairing: Modern AU! Sauron/Halbrand x bookshop owner!Reader

Summary: What if Sauron was angry sludge for a couple 100,000 more years? What if all that time mellowed him out just a little? What if he meets Sweet One and is still completely unhealthily obsessed with her? And what if she asked him to put up Christmas lights?

Tags: Christmas AU, friends to lovers, romantic tension, two losers in love, short lil drabble

Notes: Yes, this is an AU of my own Fic, but it's happier, and I like happy. I knew this was a bad idea because I wanna keep writing this. There is one of the funniest lines I think I've ever written and was honestly the inspiration for this whole mini drabble.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck” he mumbled to himself, the air was so cold his breath came out in puffs. His fingers were red and raw, having insisted that he had no need for your gloves despite your protests. He'd be fine in his jeans and thick flannel, he had argued, but he'd regretted it mere seconds after getting atop the ladder to place these damned lights.

He was The Dark Lord. The Deceiver. He had ripped elves apart with his bare hands. He had leveled cities. He had waited and bid his time for ages untold to bring his rule to bring the races of Middle Earth to their knees.

Now he was putting up Christmas lights outside a bookshop.

Why? He could wave his hand and make everyone think there were lights, decorations, a goddamn 12 foot Santa.

“Who the fuck even is Santa?” He mumbled to himself.

But he couldn't do any of that because you had asked him to hang lights.

His jaw set as he continued to work.

You. You were the reason for this. The moment he laid eyes on you, he gave it all up. All ambition. All desire for power or control. All sense of immortality. All for you. He had yet to know if you felt the same, but he did know that you were his salvation. You were good, and you were pure and looking into your heart and soul. He realized that his search for perfection ended with you.

And, if that meant hanging these stupid fucking lights, then so be it.

It took him 20 more minutes and approximately 135 more ‘fucks’ before he he was done and walking back into your shop.

“Told ya you'd need gloves,” you spoke with a smirk as you organized a few books.

“I needed no such thing, sweet one,” he spoke, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms.

“Well, either way, thank you. You're very appreciated.”

“Couldn't imagine making you get atop that ladder and do it yourself.” He responded, wetting his lips. He watched as you lit a candle, and the smell of vanilla and peppermint filled his nose.

“You really like this Christmas shit, don't you?”

“You don't?”

He shook his head, pressing his tongue against his teeth. “Nope. My family had too much…drama. Angst. Fighting.”

“Trust me, I know about dysfunctional families. I drowned it all out with old Christmas movies. Frosty the Snowman, the slow-motion puppet movies, there's so many. I love all of em.”

“And see, I've not seen a single one.”

“That's a shame,” You were back to stocking books onto shelves. You looked at one, pursing your lips, and he saw a twinkle in your eye. “What're you doing this weekend?”

He shrugged, eyebrows furrowed, “Nothing planned.” He watched you, fighting a smile and trying to act oblivious. He was nervous, truth be told, but a good nervous. A nervous that bubbled up in his stomach. It felt almost like…

Butterflies.

When was the last time he'd felt this kind of nervous excitement ? Had he ever felt like this?

You were full of surprises. You were an enigma. He didn't understand you, and though he desperately wanted to, he liked that you were different.

He watched the nervous twitch of your fingers, the way your teeth dug into your lip, he could see the thoughts racing behind your eyes as you approached him. You held a stack of thick chapter books to your chest as if to guard your heart. Your tongue ran over your bottom lip, and your eyes focused on the floor.

“Would you, maybe, like…” You inhaled and looked up at him, the butterflies in his stomach exploding into fireworks, “Would you like to come over on Friday? We could order something to eat, I could make cookies, and I could show you my favorites.”

The way your teeth bit down on your tongue, the blush to your cheeks, how your features scrunched in preparation for his response, all this was kindling to a fire.

“ Yeah… but are you sure that a weekend is enough time?” He asked with a tilt of his head. “It sounds like you have a lot of favorites, and I would really hate to make you choose between them.”

He watched as your breath caught in your chest. He had to fight the smirk that threatened to spread across his lips. He was a master manipulator, and it was taking all of his prowess to hide his true emotions at this moment.

“ Well, I mean, I'm not doing anything Saturday either if you wanted to stay the night and watch more in the morning.” Your fingers nervously stroked the top of the pages while your grip on the books got tighter.

“ Well then, I'm all yours,” He smirked down at you. “ I've never really seen a Christmas movie, I'll be glad to finally get some under my belt.” He watched you gently and hoped that you would fall for the bait that he had planted.

And by the way you shifted your weight between your feet and your eyes quickly looked down before making contact with his again, he knew he had won.

“ I am free all weekend,” you told him, your voice stuttering as the words left your lips. “ I wouldn't mind showing you more of the classics.”

He smirked and nodded, feeling victorious at the thought of spending almost three days with you. "Then that sounds like a plan.”

“ Yeah, a weekend long sleepover. But... you know... just as friends.”

“ Yeah, I know, just as friends.”

Despite his words, he couldn't help how his eyes traveled down to quickly glance at your soft, lush lips. Nor could he control how his mind wandered to how they might feel.

[stunads]

can you ever delete memories and feelings from your brain hard drive?

bryan is so interesting

i literally can’t help falling in love with him? scientifically speaking of course

it’s just so interesting

interacting with him from this much more mature place, as someone who understands herself a lot more, and understands life a lot more, and probably him a lot more even though there’s actually so much i don’t know about him now

it’s almost like i can see the past in the present

gosh i wish i could put this in to words

hopefully this is enough for my chronicles

i wonder if we’ll ever get to unlock the mystery of who we are to each other

memories flash in my mind, i can’t see them or conceptualize them but it’s like a feeling

i’ll just randomly smile during the day

and somehow i’ll know it’s because i remembered something about bryan

i mean, i haven’t changed all that much in my core, if anything .. i have become more myself

and that girl is the same girl that fell in love with him

i’m her, heyyyy it’s me

and he’s still so him

so it’s just interesting that after all this time, it feels like no time has passed

and my brain just snaps back to heart eyes, heart boom, smiling at my phone, thinking about .. that thing we used to do

gosh i literally haven’t thought about sex in a minute

that primordial blood oath am i right

let me stop typing

this was supposed to be scientific note taking

i truly need to stress to myself in the future and any potential stalkers or future invited readers that i absolutely do not care about romance at this time in my life

i have absolutely no desire to be in a relationship

i have no relationship gas in my relationship tank

all men are insane

bryan included

i don’t even know if that’s the guy i would even want to be my husband when it’s all said and done

he has on numerous occasions demolished my heart, annihilated my confidence, warped my body image, scrambled my brain to the point where only God knows the extent of how clinically insane that relationship made me, used me for my body? , lied ?, cheated and got away with it ??? , humiliated me, many many more nightmarish things the last of which i will mention here is straight up tell me he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with me lmfao

woof. a lot to unpack still lol

so

when i say scientific i mean scientific

i’m like the most normal genius girl on earth, i know future me will know if she ever needs to go back and review her field notes

that this girl is not tripping over bryan cromwell

just so curious to unravel all of these strange feelings

dreams that feel so real

the unstoppable feeling of wanting to catch up with him if it’s been too long

the undeniable truth that seeing his name pop up on my phone is still in my top favorite feelings

and let’s just say it our fucking sex was bonkers what are we going to do about that

i never want to have sex before marriage ever again stupidest fucking dumb ass idea of my retarded life thanks a lot dumb ass bryan for ruining my fucking life idiot ass

not with the sex that was awesome

by breaking up with me and ruining my life long vow of celibacy until marriage you dumb fucking piece of shit

and then i went insane and had a few accidents because being a girl is very very hard and guys don’t understand this at all and guys are very pressurey and i was raised to perform whatever tasks and fulfill whatever requests were asked of me and there are many other things that contributed to my dumb assfuckign idiot ass being perpetually retarded for a few years

not that you asked or cared piece of idiot shit

sometimes guys threaten you and throw things at you or start screaming or threaten to hurt themselves or start failing out of college if you don’t agree to hang out with them

or get you way more drunk than they got and sometimes even put things in your drink!

or fucking kiss you when you fall asleep in your own house like a fucking freak of nature

so yeah once SOMEONE you ONLY had sex with because he also believed in God and Jesus and also was planning to wait until marriage and then one day he said okay let’s go for it because obviously we are gonna get married we just can’t yet because we’re 16

when that guy dumps you forever right before college starts and he’s going to the same college as you even though he was going to penn state his whole life and said he would never go to tcnj probably just to make sure you don’t fall in love with kevin ramos

because he didn’t see or hear all of the many times you tried to tell him kevin ramos was a dare i say abusive, incredibly manipulative, scary freak that you only fell into the clutches of because aforementioned virginity taker couldn’t decide which of his fan girls he wanted to claim

when that guy dumps you before college, the guy that made you feel guilty about having premarital sex and the imminent afterlife in hell even though he pulled the trigger and you only did it because Jesus personally told you it was totally kosher because we were the most cutest couple ever, married in our hearts and in the eyes of the Lord who knew our hearts

when that guy DUMPS YOU right before you embark on another 4 years of being trapped in the same habitat, and says it’s because he doesn’t like your personality at all he is just using you for your body and that is wrong

when that happens to you, and your sacred seal is broken along with your mind body and soul

and you don’t have the protection of purity any longer

or the will to live lol

welp you get into some precarious situations and girls are taught to fuck their way out of them lest we be stabbed or strangled or punched or something

so anyways woof a lot to unpack there LOL

what was i talking about

oh right

i also only had *** with dumbass mother fucker even bigger idiot evil piece of dumb ass h**** because i thought i was gonna marry his stupid ASS because i’m so fucking RETARDED and i was legally brain dead after my last dumping and as the laws of the realm decree if i get shattered by bryan i have to fall into the hands of a diabolical lying manipulating violent psychopath

but i finally stopped being retarded

so by the power of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ through the grace of God and the guidance of the Holy Spirit i really really really really don’t want to have sex again with anyone on planet earth unless that man is my husband actually ring on, church saw, God saw, locked in

okay but here’s the crux of the issue - what if he’s trash and got a small dick and no stroke and doesn’t have beautiful eyelashes or crooked pinkies or the voice of an angel or makes those cute little faces and noises or grab me and the right way

okay some of those things i can verify pre maritally

i’ve honestly lost track of things a bit got myself a little flustered

it’s so funny how just thinking about how cute bryan is just wipes away any bad feelings i could have lmfaooo now im like girl chill out why did you pop off for 7 paragraphs he can use us for our body that’s fine

LOL i need Jesus to come pick me up fr like i need to hang up my human body in the rafters of this mortal coil like a jersey, i’m at the retarded mall of life and i need a ride home,

anyways i think i made my points for tonight’s field report

to recap

1. i love being friends with bryan

2. i hope one day the nature of our true meaning to each other will become more evident

3. i hope we both find the perfect partner and will be able to each have a beautiful wedding to exact person God made for us and that we can both be at each other’s wedding and God willing that process could happen at the same time so it’s just perfect and we can be truly happy for each other and friends with each others partners and friends together forever

4. life is so beautiful but also so scary and it makes me happy that even though many things change, i can still talk to bryan cromwell and things don’t feel scary anymore