#we literally had a conversation about how i can’t speak when it matters

[adampage]

would rather die than speak openly to people i care about

[lloydskywalkers]

moats and boats and waterfalls

Read on AO3

Post-Crystalized — after surviving apocalypse no. 2 (possibly 3, currently under debate) the ninja now face the unspeakable horrors of budgeting.

(Years late to the Crystalized party but here's part one of my seven billion fanfics about this season because there are Thoughts to be had about this one)

As it turns out, rebuilding a monastery is a whole lot more trouble than rebuilding the Bounty for the eightieth time. 

And by trouble, Cole means incredibly expensive.

“Re-installing central heating costs what?!” 

Kai’s horrified cry reverberates throughout the half-constructed monastery, the echo from the noticeably empty rooms only adding to insult. 

Oh, what Cole would give to have his bed back. 

“I guess we’ll have to use you during the winter,” Nya sighs, patting Kai on the back. “Lloyd, get ready to supercharge him.”

“Forget heating, do you know how much Wi-Fi costs?” Lloyd stares at the estimated summary like it’s personally kicked his pet. “Who even has that much money? God?”

“If god had money, he could’ve given Sensei Wu his inheritance and we’d all be loaded,” Jay mutters. “But noooo, ‘material possessions are the death of the soul’, blah blah blah, we’ll see whose soul is dead when the gas cuts out and he can’t make midnight tea anymore.” 

“It does seem a bit extreme, looking at it all like this,” Zane remarks. Somewhat ironically, as he’s taken one look at the bill then wisely retreated across the room. 

“Well, blowing up the entire monastery with us in it was extreme, so it figures repairs are just as bad,” Nya grumbles. 

They all shift, the mood dampening at the reminder. 

Lloyd opens his mouth. “I’m sor—”

“Do not,” Kai stabs a finger at him. “Even try.”

Lloyd slumps. “If I hadn’t gotten caught—”

“We all agreed to the plan, okay?” Cole says. “Also, no one knew we’d be sending you to Harumi, so the whole thing was doomed from the start.”

While he looks a bit miffed, Lloyd gives it up. Though perhaps that’s mostly in part because he desperately wants to avoid any more conversation about—

“So speaking of Harumi,” Jay starts. 

Lloyd springs for the window. 

Unfortunately for Lloyd, said window is currently boarded up by heavy-duty plywood, since quality window glass fell low on the list of priorities, which gives Kai plenty of time to tackle him before he can even raise his leg to kick it in. 

“No!” Zane cries. “We can’t afford anymore plywood!”

“Or like, Band-Aids at bare minimum, so don’t you dare!” Nya adds. 

“—overdramatic phase has gotta go, what are you, five — hey, no biting!”

Lloyd makes a muffled sound as he wrestles on the floor with Kai. Cole turns, very slowly, to glare at Jay.

“Oh come on, we were all thinking it,” Jay defends, reluctantly standing to help pry Lloyd from the floor. “Fine, hey, I promise we won’t talk about certain loser ex-princesses who are nice and cozy in their prison cells right now, okay? There, there, little gremlin, she can’t hurt you anymore—”

“I’ll bite you next,” Lloyd threatens, but he returns to his seat, wincing as Kai scuffs his hair. 

“Turn Oni again, and that might be an actual threat.”

Lloyd startles terribly, staring at Kai with wide eyes. “That’s — not — I wouldn’t—”

“Kai,” Nya hisses.

“Woah, hey, no, I didn’t mean it like that!” Kai says quickly. “It’s supposed to be positive reinforcement! Easing it into a normal thing, y’know?”

Lloyd growls. “Nothing about this is a normal thing—”

“Except none of us are normal, so therefore it is,” Kai interrupts him smoothly. “Also we already loved you when you were a tiny demon, turning into a literal one is nothing. Give us some credit.” 

Lloyd pulls his hood over his flaming face, thunking his head against the table. Kai pats him cheerfully on the shoulder. 

“Additionally, unless we can swindle someone by selling Lloyd in his Oni form on the black market for cold cash before stealing him back, I don’t see how this helps matters.”

Zane finds himself on the receiving end of five blank stares. Lloyd, successfully having been pulled from his hood, whistles. 

“I forget how evil you can be, sometimes.”

Kai gapes at him. “So that makes you feel better?”

“I mean, in terms of normalizing it—”

“Alright!” Cole slams his hands on the table, silencing them all. He glares them down. “Meeting room in five. We’re figuring out how to make this place livable if it kills us.”

There’s a brief silence, then Jay hesitantly raises his hand.

“Hey, so uh, we kinda don’t have a meeting room right now?”

Cole collapses on the table in despair. 

---

Twenty minutes and one session of shoving chairs into what could have been the living room later — it’s hard to tell, with all the construction markings and plywood still up — they’ve kicked off the official first meeting of the Finish-Making-the-Monastery-Livable plan. 

“Alright,” Lloyd announces, brushing his hands as he steps back from the chalkboard that may or may not have been stolen. “At the top of the list we have Wi-Fi, central air and heating, beds — huh, maybe those should go higher — running water, electricity — that one’s debatable, me and Jay can tag-team it if we get desperate — blankets-slash-pillows-slash-etcetera, stuff to cook with, actual food — y’know what, I’m putting that closer to the top—”

“So basically, we have nothing,” Cole says blankly. 

Lloyd glances at the list, then to the sliver of chalk left in his hands. “Uh. Yeah.” 

“Take the weaponry, sure, but all my albums?” Jay mourns. “I spent years collecting those.” 

“I lost the blanket we stole from that super fancy apartment we lived in for like five minutes when Lloyd was a kid,” Kai sighs. “That thing literally made it through the apocalypse, just to bite it now.” 

“Two apocalypses too many,” Nya says.

“Did the Preeminent count as an apocalypse? Like, a minor one?”

“Three apocalypses. It took three apocalypses to vaporize my closet,” Cole sinks lower in his seat. “Man, the hoodie you got me for my birthday was in there.” 

“All of our photographs are lost, too.” Zane stares at his hands. 

Lloyd murmurs something under his breath that sounds a lot like family pictures and figures. 

The mood plummets a bit more, after that. 

“Motherfu—”

“Alright, this isn’t helping,” Cole claps his hands. “We can all cry again later. Lloyd, overall mission status conclusion?”

“Well, like you said, we basically have nothing,” Lloyd sighs. “So unless Zane wants to stop chickening out and abandon his morals so we can just hack into everything and get it free, we need to find some way to pay for all this.”

“Again, I cannot hack in to rebuilding an entire cooling unit throughout the monastery, much less make the latest clothing line from Gucci materialize,” Zane says. Kai swears. “Also, that is called stealing.” 

“You call it stealing, I call it a charitable donation,” Nya says. “I turned into the ocean for this city, the least they can do is cut me a check.”��

“Besides, even if it is stealing, what are they gonna do, send us to jail again?” Jay scoffs.

Lloyd jabs the piece of chalk in his direction. “Don’t jinx us.” 

“Too bad we wasted our chance at crime and didn’t even get rich,” Kai mutters. “All we got was Nya.”

He yelps as she punches him in the arm. “What, too soon?”

“You should be so lucky to have me,” she sniffs. 

“Hey, but going on the donation thought train — do we know anyone who’s rich?” Jay asks. “Why don’t we have any rich friends?”

“Hey, you know what’s rich? That coming from the son of a billionaire.”

“Hey, you know what else got blown up? My inheritance!” 

“Please, let it go,” Zane says. “We do have rich friends, I’ll remind you, we’re friends with actual monarchy. But we can’t exactly go and ask anyone else for money, since they all already helped out so much in getting the monastery rebuilt.”

There’s a moment of pensive silence. Lloyd draws a little sad face on the chalkboard next to ASK FOR DONATIONS. 

“What if we just…sued Harumi,” Cole says. “Like, there’s gotta be some law that could work in our favor here.”

“I don’t think the court would go for that,” Lloyd mutters. “Since they’re all morally corrupt frauds who hate us.”

“Yeah! Down with the system!” Kai punches his fist in the air. 

“Also, Harumi likely has very little in the way of money, either,” Zane says. “Considering she blew up any and all assets she might have had claim to.”

“Haha, what a loser,” Nya crows.

“What if we sued Garmadon?” Cole tries. “The courts have to hate him more than they hate us.”

Lloyd scowls, scrawling a large NO on the chalkboard. “Not worth the effort. Plus, I’m pretty sure he’s still couch-surfing at Vinny’s, which means also penniless.”

“We could sue Kalmaar,” Nya cracks her knuckles.

“Isn’t he dead?” 

“Oh, yeah.” Nya looks disappointed. 

“Did anyone survive that we can sue successfully?” Jay muses. “And actually get money out of?”

“Vangelis,” Cole snaps his fingers. “Wait. No, we ousted him from the throne, so he’s probably broke too.”

“Vangelis survived?”

As they dissolve into bickering over the status of enemies potentially living-or-dead, Kai squints at the chalkboard, where Lloyd is still scratching out letters despite having completely lost the room. 

“We…are…fu—Lloyd!” 

“Well it’s true,” Lloyd huffs, finishing off his message with a flourish. “Tada. There’s my grand plan.”

“That’s not a plan, it’s a pessimistic estimation at how things are gonna go.”

“It’s extremely rude language, is what it is! I thought we taught you better.”

Lloyd simply looks pleased with himself at having recaptured the room’s attention. It is, of course, then that Sensei Wu walks into that room. He stops, looking from where they’re all frozen in place, then to the chalkboard. 

Lloyd pales. 

Sensei Wu pinches the bridge of his nose between his fingers and closes his eyes. 

“My dearest nephew, you have three seconds to make that disappear, or I’ll be forced to—”

Lloyd springs for the chalkboard in record time, wiping frantically at his writing with the sleeve of his gi. 

“People would kill for that thing, and here he’s using it as a chalkboard eraser,” Jay mutters. 

It isn’t until later, when they’ve all retreated to the collective mass of blow-up mattress and borrowed blankets they’re calling a bedroom, that anyone breaches the topic again. 

There’s a loud rustling as Cole turns over where he’s precariously shoved between Kai and Zane. 

“…can we sue the mayor?”

There’s a noted pause of silence, only broken by the whirring of the cheap oscillating fan. 

“You know,” Zane says slowly. “In terms of slander and defamation…” 

An evil, sharp-toothed smile spreads across Lloyd’s face. “I like the sound of that.”

“Hey, let’s sue the new ninja, too,” Jay grins. “Can Pixal retroactively trademark our vibe?”

“You cannot sue them based on vibe appropriation.”

“Yeah, but I can sue them for impersonation.”

---

They cannot, as it turns out, sue the mayor, because legal work like that costs even more money. 

They can, however, ruin his year by filing (and forging) every possible insurance claim under the sun, so they all walk out of the office a little more satisfied than before. 

“I hope all your socks go missing in the laundry!” Nya yells toward the building as they hit the streets. “I hope you have a rock stuck in your shoe for the rest of your life! I hope you’re plagued with a mildly inconvenient headache every waking moment and never fully enjoy anything ever again!”

“Alright, alright, we’re getting looks,” Cole grabs her arm. “Let it go.”

“As much as I appreciate it, I am not going back to jail,” Jay shudders. “Twice was enough.”

Kai frowns. “Twice? When else did you get arrested?”

“We all did, re—” Jay cuts off, suddenly aware of the absolute daggers Nya is staring at him. “Uhhh…aw, snap, another mental breakdown, haha!”

“Is this the whole ‘we all have missing memories you guys are definitely hiding from us’ thing again? ‘Cause I swear—”

“I said I’m getting to it, it’s a really boring story anyways—”

“Didn’t you say you lost an eye—”

“Oh look, a window!”

This time, Jay is thwarted by Lloyd, who’s simply jumped out enough windows to recognize when someone’s about to try it themselves. Except Jay is aiming to jump inside a window this time, so they both go crashing into Pixal just as she joins them. 

To her credit, she barely flinches. “I thought I heard clown noises nearby.” 

Lloyd stares at her in such utter betrayal, the mental breakdown thing might become valid.  

“Pixal,” Jay simply begs. “Please. Help your clowns scavenge our clown dinners.”

Pixel surveys them all, a fond smile tugging at her lips. “There is a nice pizza place down the block.”

The cheers she’s met with nearly succeeded at knocking her over where Jay failed.  

Dinner that night comprises of actual, warm, take-out pizza, which nearly moves Cole to tears.

“Definitely changing the priorities order,” Lloyd says blissfully through a mouthful of cheese. “Food goes at the top, no questions.”

“Seconded,” Kai mumbles. 

“Thirded.”

“Fourthed.”

“I cannot believe, that after everything we’ve been through, we did not qualify for the post-apocalypse discount,” Zane bites out. 

“Well,” Jay says brightly. “Pixal hacked the card reader, so technically we got a hundred percent discount.”

Zane stares at her, in equally utter betrayal. “Pixal?”

She shrugs. “They can try to send me to prison. They will fail.” 

---

Two days later, Skylor cements herself as everybody’s most favorite person in the entire world by not only saving them from starvation by demanding they sit their butts down in the restaurant and eat for free, but also donating six pillows and a year’s worth of shampoo. 

“I know it’s not a lot, but I’m on the lookout for more,” she tells them. “I’ve asked other people to help chip in, too, so hopefully that’ll make things a little easier.”

“Skylor,” Cole nearly sobs into his new, beautiful pillow. “If Kai doesn’t marry you, I will.”

“H-hey!”

“No marriage necessary,” she snorts. “Consider keeping you all fed my way of saying thanks.”

“But you already helped out with the monastery,” Nya says, around the same time the rest of them assure her there’s no need for thanks, despite the fact that no one has the slightest desire to relinquish their food. 

“Fine, then,” Skyler huffs, her cheeks turning pink. “Make me say it out loud, will you — consider it my way of showing that I care about you all. Very much.” 

“Aww,” Lloyd says. 

Kai makes a face somewhere between melting and heart eyes. 

“I hate all of you,” she mutters. 

“We love you too, Skylor,” Cole grins. 

“Hate you!”

Despite her words, they all leave with six boxes of leftovers and free dessert. 

This, of course, brings another slightly-pressing issue to mind.  

---

They end up getting a refrigerator for a steal of a bargain, which is probably again influenced by Pixal’s criminal extremely generous activity. 

Given how enthusiastic they all are about getting it installed, Kai is half-expecting there to be no work left for him at all by the time he returns from the food run. 

He’s…not entirely disappointed when he walks into the kitchen, though he is rather baffled. 

The room freezes as if on record-scratch. Jay is perched on top of the counters, Lloyd has a sledgehammer raised halfway in the air, and Cole is on the ground beside the refrigerator crying. 

“What?” Kai asks, blankly. 

“The fridge…doesn’t fit…” Cole moans into the floor. 

“We didn’t leave enough space between the cabinets,” Jay informs him through a mouthful of gummy worms. “So the door can’t open.”

Kai looks at Lloyd. “So the sledgehammer is for…?”

“DIY home improvement,” he shrugs.

“Huh.” Kai glances at the cabinets. “Put some safety goggles on first, okay?”

Lloyd only gets about two swings in before Zane descends with the all wrath of the Ice Emperor and adds to the tally of times-the- Green-Ninja-almost-met-his-doom, but it’s fun while it lasts. 

They were ugly cabinets, anyways. 

---

While his love for his family could potentially fuel a nuclear power plant, Kai does grow tired of being the living team space heater rather quickly. 

The effort of keeping his power going all night just gets annoying (and exhausting) — so by the time he’s tagged in Lloyd to use his power to keep him going, they’re up to two moody ninja short on sleep, and no one wants to deal with that. 

While they’ve scrounged up a few dollar-store quality blankets, Jay takes the opportunity to highlight his accomplishments in arts-and-crafts.

“You mean your mom’s accomplishments.”

“Hey, we made it together! It counts.”

The it in question quickly gains the name “god-awful-t-shirt-blanket” simply because the blinding combination of all their cast-off shirts sewn together is impressively terrible. 

“I still think this is a waste of good clothes,” Kai grumbles. “It’s not like we have outfits to spare these days, you know.”

“Do you wanna keep heating the room at night or no?” Nya threatens. 

Kai quickly shuts his mouth and returns to sewing Cole’s old plaid shirt to one of Jay’s neon blue shirts that features a dolphin printed in enough colors to kill a man. 

“So, what do we think?” Lloyd steps back, wiping at his forehead with his arm as he surveys their masterpiece. 

Staring at the multi-colored mess they’ve patched together into a quilt, Nya announces, “It’s the ugliest blanket I’ve ever seen.”

“Harsh.”

“Hey, we did our best!”

“See if I ever sew for you again,” Lloyd huffs. 

“I didn’t say that was a bad thing,” Nya quickly interjects. “It looks a little like us!”

“Are you saying we’re ugly?!”

“Nya, no, our family genes are enough to carry us through this, I promise—”

---

They’re in the middle of figuring out how to steal Wi-Fi from the government when Tox drops by, Karloff in tow. 

“You really…need…to get an elevator…or something,” she pants, red-faced and sweaty as she hauls several large bags behind her.

In contrast, Karloff looks unfazed, casually toting a hideously floral-patterned sofa over his shoulder. 

“Skylor mentioned you need furniture, no?” he says. “It’s not much, but you need somewhere to sit.”

“Karloff,” Jay tells him, very seriously. “This is the most beautiful sofa I’ve ever seen.” 

“Haha! Karloff is right once again,” he brags to Tox. 

Tox stares at Jay in flabbergasted despair. 

“You can’t put that in your home,” she mutters. “You can’t. It’s a crime against eyes everywhere.”

“Well, it’s better than no sofa, and we’re literally turning down nothing these days,” Nya says cheerfully. She leans over to peer at the bags Tox has managed to drag up. “Speaking of…?”

“Oh, yeah.” Tox heaves the bags in front of her. “Skylor said you guys needed help interior decorating? So I brought a couple rugs. She also mentioned something about the ugliest blanket she’s ever seen, so we called up some of the other Elemental Masters and got like, six or seven together. They’re not exactly works of art, but they’re okay?”

Kai tears open the first bag, his eyes lighting up. “They’re beautiful,” he whispers reverently. “Hey, guys, we got blankets! Dibs on the one with a wolf.”

“Oh, no, not that one, it’s from my awful middle school phase—”

“What do you mean, dibs, I want the wolf one!”

“Oh yeah? Down to fight for it?”

“You’re on. Training ground in five.”

“Absolutely not, we are not fighting over a blanket we’ve been so generously gifted,” Zane snaps, snagging Kai and Cole by their collars. 

“Yeah, we also don’t really have a training ground anymore,” Lloyd says, half-buried in a blanket embroidered with countless bug-eyed fish. “It went ka-boom.”

Nya rubs her temples. “Zane?”

“Already factored into the expenses,” he sighs. 

“Oh wow, you guys weren’t kidding,” Tox says. “Do you want, uh, like a keychain? I have some mints here too I can donate…man, Karloff, help me out!” 

“Does the monastery need a metal helmet?”

“We’re really not that broke,” Nya says hastily, pushing away the offered mints. “But thanks.”

“Speak for yourself.” Lloyd snags the mints, clasping his hands together in prayer at Tox before slipping back into the emerging blanket battle. 

Nya sighs. “Do you guys want tea? We’ve got three whole mugs, now.”

Tox glances from the other ninja, where Jay has been successfully rolled into a blanket burrito and is in potential danger of being rolled right down the mountain, to Karloff, who’s the reason said danger is potential. 

“We can spare a minute, I guess.”

The t-shirt blanket is later relegated to the living room, where it lives as a throw blanket over Karloff’s floral sofa. They unanimously decide it’s the perfect home for it, and the only real critic is Skylor, who’s almost reduced to tears the next time she visits. 

---

They celebrate their achievement of having a living room by all eating dinner on Karloff’s floral-patterned couch. This comes with a good deal of kicking and squirming and the tragic loss of Kai’s fortune cookie, but they make it work. 

“This is kind of depressing, though. Sitting in the dark,” Nya remarks. 

A muscle in Jay’s jaw twitches. “Well, maybe if someone hadn’t melted all our candles—”

“You were the one who had the brilliant idea of trying to barbecue with them, genius!” Kai snaps. 

“It was a pretty spectacular fire,” Lloyd admits. Then, hastily, “In a really cool way!” 

“Perhaps a lamp should go next on the list,” Zane says. “Rather than relying on Kai as our light.”

“Hey, I’m a great light,” Kai scowls. “I’m the light of your life. I could light this place up all day!” 

“Yes, and I’m sure it would end similarly to the time you nearly burned down a building under the belief that you were achieving your true potential, but were, in fact, just dehydrated.”

Kai gapes at Zane in betrayal. “You said you’d take that to the grave!” 

Zane carefully laces his fingers together. “Technically, I did.”

“No you didn’t!” Jay interjects. “We never buried you, so you never had a grave! Ha!”

Zane looks affronted. “I didn’t get a grave?”

“You got a statue!” Kai quickly consoles . 

“Yeah, what’d you want us to do, pick your exploded pieces out of the street for half a year then toss ‘em in the ground?”

“Oh, as if that’s any worse than being left to pour your corpse out in cups of water.”

 “It wasn’t my corpse, I was still alive!”

“You were the literal ocean. Fish swam in you.” 

“Ew, does that mean—”

“Finish that sentence and I will drown you where you stand—”

“You’re all in desperate need of counseling,” Pixal mutters. 

“Tell me about it,” Lloyd says, leaning back on the armrest of the sofa. 

Cole shakes his head. “Lost causes, all of them.”

Pixal stares at them both, expression pinched, before deciding to respect the hopelessness of lost causes. 

“Hold on, I think Kai’s crying,” Lloyd moves to sit up, only to wobble, slip sideways, and go crashing to the floor gracelessly.  

“Just like when I fell to my doom off the Bounty,” Cole reminisces.  

 Pixal’s eyes glaze over. 

---

Later that evening, Pixal adds “therapy” to the list of potential expenses on the fridge door. Regretfully, it loses miserably in the debate against hot shower expenses, so it too joins the pile of repressed memories that will undoubtedly haunt them in the future. 

“But hey, a hot shower can cure depression on a good day,” Cole says, and that settles that. 

---

Hot showers, as it turns out, are a hard-won priority. 

It’s less so after Jay, Nya, and Pixal camp out overnight near the pipeline and perform their own less-than-legal maintenance, but one of Zane’s carefully filed insurance claims actually went through the other day, so they’re taking their luck as they can. 

It’s not until they get working on the bathroom itself that the true difficulty makes itself clear. 

“Hey, uh,” Kai stares down at the patch of rotted floor he’s ripped up, wiping at the fog that’s spread across his safety goggles. “Is the base layer supposed to look like that?”

“Look like what?” Cole abandons the tiling he’s been placing to glance over. His face drops. “Uh-oh.” 

“Is that all black mold?” Nya gags, nearly dropping her bottle of cleaning bleach.  

“FSM, no wonder we’re all crazy,” Cole mutters. 

“Alright,” Kai strips off his rubber gloves. “Nothing for it. Back up, guys, I’m barbecuing this baby.”

“Wait wait wait don’t—”

Ten minutes and a good deal of hacking and wheezing through teary eyes later, Cole murders Kai while they all look on. 

Well, he attempts to.

“You filled the monastery with chlorine gas, you absolute moron—!”

“How was I supposed to know that would happen, I’m not a chemist—”

Nya glares ahead darkly as Lloyd gingerly treats the reddened blisters on her hands. 

“None of you,” Zane says, through gritted teeth. “Are touching cleaning chemicals for a year.” 

---

“Not sure I wanna know how you pulled off poisoning yourselves, but I’m kinda impressed you did a better job of it than most criminals would,” Ronin tells them, once the monastery has been successfully de-chlorinated and the bathroom tiles firmly put in place, sans black mold. 

“Maybe we can hire ourselves out to them when we’re strapped for cash,” Nya sighs.

“We’re literally always strapped for cash. We’re broke.”

Ronin laughs, clapping Jay on the back. “Welcome to adulthood, kid.”

“I don’t think normal adulthood gets their home blown up on a regular basis,” Lloyd hisses.

“Fair point,” Ronin nods. 

“Well, thanks for saving us all from a slow and painful death,” Cole scrubs his hands over his face. “We can pay you back sometime in the next century. Maybe.”

“Ah, don’t worry about it,” Ronin waves them off. “It’d be like kicking a dog when it’s down, askin’ you all to pay. Besides, I probably owe you one.”

“You sure do,” Jay glares. 

“Hey, hey, I said I was sorry for the whole human sacrifice thing,” Ronin placates. “Want some good news, at least?”

“Is it actually good news?” Lloyd eyes him shrewdly.

“Lighten up, captain trust issues.” Kai barely snags Lloyd before he lands himself back in jail. “I looked into some more of those insurance claims you filed, and you actually got somethin’ out of it. I, uh, helped the bank along a bit, with the refund.”

“Bank?” Cole whispers.

“Refund?” Jay’s eyes shine. 

“Yeah, got you all your checks right here,” Ronin says, tugging six neat envelopes from his jacket. “Just don’t blow ‘em all at once, okay? Haha.”

Zane looks as if he might propose to him on the spot. 

“Hey, this isn’t too bad!” Kai exclaims. “We got money!”

“Guys,” Lloyd says, staring at his check. “You know we should probably pool all this together and spend it on necessities, right?”

“Yeah,” Cole sighs. 

“It would be the smartest course of action,” Zane adds. 

There’s a noted silence.

“Or,” Lloyd says. 

---

In their defense, they spend exactly two-thirds of their checks on household items. 

Whether or not these are needed household items remains a debate. 

“If we’re all buying lamps for the living room, can we at least attempt to match?” Zane sighs. 

“Booo, where’s your joy and whimsy?” Jay sticks out his tongue. 

“That isn’t even a lamp, it’s a light-up axolotl.”

“The heck’s an axo-lot—”

“It lights up, doesn’t it? Ergo, it’s a lamp.”

“Ergo, what are you, Sensei Wu—”

“We’re never having guests over again,” Cole remarks, as Lloyd and Nya maneuver a five-foot-tall rendition of Godzilla into the shopping cart that may or may not light up. 

“The monastery’s gonna look rad as heck, we’re forcing everyone to come over and look at it,” Kai corrects as he tosses a set of flame-patterned curtains into the mess. 

“Absolutely not.” 

“I actually might like them,” Zane muses. “They would capture the energy of our kitchen perfectly.”

Kai beams. “Flame curtains are a go!” 

In the aftermath, they total around six individual blankets, five mismatching lamps and one light-up axolotl, a table that no one knows how to put together, one set of flame-patterned curtains, another hideous couch, and enough cutlery and kitchenware that no one has to eat out of Sensei Wu’s incense bowls anymore. 

“Alright,” Lloyd says. “We’ve got three hours until the stores start closing. Everyone take the rest of your checks, don’t think about how much of a disaster the monastery still is, and start thinking about how valid retail therapy is.” 

“Aye-aye,” Kai salutes, before immediately booking it for the clothing outlets. 

---

Three hours later, Kai’s happily blown his entire check on a new wardrobe and exactly one pair of name-brand brand shoes. He’s unreasonably proud of himself for his restraint, until he catches Cole with three pairs of his own name-brand shoes, and immediately regrets being responsible. 

He spots Jay going off in the N-Pop section of a music store, Nya investing in a sinfully-priced espresso machine, and Zane walking toward the clothing outlets himself with a high-quality pair of noise-cancelling headphones. 

He doesn’t find Lloyd until well after he’s picked up his own clothes, already sporting an oversized hoodie he could’ve just stolen from Kai. 

He’s more concerned when Lloyd proceeds to blow the last of his check at the sporting goods section of the local convenience store. Considering how long Lloyd spent looking wistfully at the candy aisle, Kai is baffled by the decision. 

He’s even more baffled when Lloyd proceeds to box up his purchase for delivery instead of keeping it himself.

He’s utterly horrified when he sees who it’s addressed to.

“Are you serious?!” he asks shrilly, torn between ripping the box from Lloyd’s hands or immediately calling the mental health hotline. “You’re sending her gifts?”

“It’s not a gift, it’s — look, it’s a long story, you wouldn’t get it,” Lloyd grumbles, plastering another layer of duct tape over the box. “Just help me deliver it to Kryptarium and I’ll show you, okay?”

Kai very much does not help, because he’s not an enabler and he cares about his brother’s mental health, but he does follow Lloyd to Kryptarium Prison and lurk behind him as he eagerly watches the surveillance screens. 

Harumi stares at the box before her, looking every bit as baffled as Kai is. 

“Who would send me a volleyball—”

She freezes, her face going utterly blank. A muscle in her jaw twitches. 

There’s a brief flash of what could be amusement, a brief expression as if she’s eaten something sour, then a fury like no other eclipses her face. 

“LLOYD! I’LL KILL YOU MYSELF, YOU THINK YOU’RE HILARIOUS—”

Lloyd’s still laughing by the time they’re escorted from the premises, hard enough that Kai has to catch him when he trips at the top of the steps. 

“What’d you even write on the note?” Kai finally asks, a bit in awe. 

Lloyd grins. “I told her good luck getting together her villainous volleyball team in jail.”

Kai blinks. “Do I…want to know?”

“Nope!” Lloyd says airily. “But I’ve made my point.”

---

Regardless of some behaviors, the mental health hotline remains a constant idea. It simply happens to come up at inconvenient times, such as when Cole drops a dresser on his foot halfway across the courtyard. 

He swears so loudly the whole monastery echoes with it. 

“Oh geez, Cole, are you okay? Why’d you lift the whole thing on your own?”

“We could have helped,” Zane rushes over. “You don’t have to do it all yourself—”

“Yes I do!” Cole yells. “I’m stronger than that, I’m supposed to be stronger, I have to be stronger or you’re all going to die next time—”

He cuts off abruptly. Zane looks heartbroken. Jay—

Is suddenly busy smacking Cole upside the head. 

“No, you don’t!” he snaps back, even louder. “You don’t have to do it by yourself! None of you do! Every time anyone tries to do something by themselves it all goes wrong and we lose someone, so we’re never — doing that — again!” 

He seizes Cole around the arms, his wild eyes meeting Cole’s wide ones. “No one blames you for the stupid tunnel. I don’t care how strong you are. We’re all here and that’s what matters, so don’t you dare put that at risk.”

“But I—”

“No.”

“Jay, I—”

“No.”

“I—”

“No!” A manic expression overtakes Jay’s face. “No, no, no! No one’s taking the blame. No one’s isolating themselves. No. One. Is. Going. Off. Alone. You hear me?!” 

The others are frozen, halfway outstretched hands caught as if suspended in ice. Kai’s expression is twisted painfully. Lloyd’s eyes are on the ground. Zane is as frozen as the metaphorical ice, and Nya looks devastated. 

“No more being alone,” Jay says, the fire in his voice giving way to something wetter and considerably more sniffly. “No more. Don’t — you can’t—”

“Okay,” Cole whispers. He carefully takes Jay’s hands from his shoulders, grasping them in his own instead. “Okay. No more going at it alone. I promise.”  

 The monastery courtyard seems a little colder, in the silence.  

“Anyone feel like circling back to the whole ‘suing Harumi’ idea?” Kai finally speaks up. 

Jay gives a wet snort. 

“Well, we’re probably gonna need to afford tissues,” Lloyd says. His own voice isn’t exactly dry, either. 

---

The downside to sticking therapy smack at the bottom of their priorities is that they all really are, in fact, not okay. 

Most of the time, they manage. 

There’s a solace in being together, a comfort in having the people you trust and care for most in the world right next to you when the nightmares get bad. When Jay awakens screaming for Nya or clutching at his throat for air, Nya is already holding his hand and Cole’s holding the rest of him.

When Zane lapses into silence too long, emotions a roiling mess that leave him paralyzed, Kai is there with one-two-three’s for breathing and Lloyd is there to draw little cats with him until the world subsides again. 

When Cole’s eyes shadow in training and his hits grow wild, Zane is there to pin him before he bloodies his hands and Jay is there to sing horrible off-key songs he loves until the panic ebbs.

When Nya stares at the water too-long, her eyes misty and her expression dreamy, Jay is there to hold her tight and Kai is there to talk until his voice goes hoarse and hers returns. 

There are other times, though, when it’s harder. 

It hits Kai this time about halfway through painting the walls of the kitchen a cheerful yellow, said paint splattered up to his elbows, courtesy of Lloyd. He glances down — to joke, to laugh, to not think—

And pauses. With the headband he’s stolen from Pixal in place, pushing back the mass of thick blond hair, Kai can just see the purple-red edges of the swollen, irritated wounds that scar Lloyd’s scalp. The twin marks are a better sight than when Kai first glimpsed them, bleeding circles that looked as if someone had drilled into Lloyd’s skull — but not by much. 

“S’fine,” Lloyd mutters, catching Kai’s devastated expression. “I can’t even feel ‘em. Not really.”

“Liar,” Kai rasps. “They look awful.”

Lloyd makes a face. “Gee, thanks a lot.”

“I mean it. What if they get infected, or worse, or — have you had Sensei look at them?”

Lloyd wraps his arms around himself, avoiding Kai’s eyes. “No. I didn’t really…I did what he asked. What they both did. And then screwed the whole thing up, so it was all useless anyways, so I—”

He bites his lip, hard enough to crack the already dry skin. 

“I don’t really wanna hear anyone telling me what else I’m doing wrong with myself, right now.” 

Kai is angry enough to feel sick. 

“That’s stupid. That’s so stupid, he should — it shouldn’t be like that, it’s — why didn’t anyone—” he shakes his head. “Why doesn’t anyone ever ask us if we wanna be — if we wanna—”

Lloyd’s hand closes around his wrist, gently tugging Kai’s own hand from where it’s clawed unconsciously at his arm, leaving ugly red stripes against his skin. 

“You asked,” he says, quietly. “That meant a lot.”

Kai looks away. “Lot of good it did.”

Lloyd’s grip tightens. “It meant the world to me,” he repeats, stronger this time. 

“But I couldn’t—!”

Lloyd abandons his hold on his wrist to wrap his arms around Kai entirely, holding tight. Bony and strong and familiar, Kai’s little brother to the core. 

“Thank you,” he says, fervently enough that Kai can feel the ache in his voice. “Thank you for looking out for me.”

Kai’s voice is a miserable mess of fought-back tears. “I couldn’t even do anything.” 

“You asked me what I wanted,” Lloyd says once again, and Kai can hear the edge of tears threatening his voice, now. “That was everything.” 

Giving in, Kai drops his head into the mess of blond curls and hugs Lloyd back. Lloyd’s hair smells like blood and paint and steel and the strawberry shampoo Skylor gave them, and now it’s gonna smell like Kai’s stupid snot and tears. 

“Hey, having another hug party without me is lame.” 

Kai gives a wet, broken response as Nya throws her arms around them both. 

“Idiots,” she murmurs, resting her head atop theirs. “I love you both, you know that?”

“Ew, gross,” Lloyd snorts wetly. “Hey Kai, Nya loves us.”

“Little jerk, who you callin’ gross? And here I thought you loved us too.” 

“Well obviously I love you guys back, who’s the idiot now—”

Kai simply clutches them both and cries harder, as if holding onto them will stop himself from falling apart.

It works, in the ways that matter, though it’s always because they’re holding back even tighter. 

Later that evening, Zane bathes Lloyd’s head in antiseptic and Jay forces them all to sit through the PowerPoint presentation he’s made with Nya titled “Every Super Cool Totally Good Character with Horns Ranked”. He loses them the minute he brings anime characters into it, as everyone suddenly develops incredibly passionate opinions about the rankees, but Lloyd’s laughing too hard to have his own opinion and Kai doesn’t feel like he’s drowning under inadequacy anymore — just choking to death under the weight of Jay’s elbow for daring to insult Re:Zero as an anime “since it actually has Oni in it, idiot, your opinion is trash—” 

They get things back to being okay, one way or another. 

---

Somewhere in the third month of renovations, they finally scrounge up six whole beds. It takes a good deal of dragging and cursing, but they finally manage to move into their own rooms, the once-empty spaces looking a little less lonely. 

“Now we don’t have to all sleep together in the same room anymore,” Jay announces. There’s no small amount of celebration at that.

The celebration lasts up until sometime around three in the morning, at which point the  consistent nightmares land them all right back in the pile of communal air mattresses. 

“Just for like, one more night,” Kai yawns, as Lloyd curls closer beneath his arm. 

“Totally, yeah,” Nya echoes, one leg spread across Jay, her arm sprawled over Kai. 

“Go to sleep already, FSM’ sake,” Cole begs, before slumping over Zane. 

For all Cole’s begging, he’s still the first to act when Zane suddenly lurches up from the bed, gasping for air like he’s drowning and giving them all joint heart attacks. 

“—hey, hey, it’s okay, it’s just us—”

Cole’s hands hover, non-threatening, as Zane buries his face in his palms, breathing ragged. The others have begun to get up now as well, the slow kind of approach that lets Zane know exactly where each of them are. 

“I despise this,” Zane spits, as his hand drags down to fist over his chest. “I hate feeling like this. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it—”

“I know,” Cole says. “I know.”

“This is why — it’s so much easier—“

“It’s okay, it’s—”

“It is not! I do not need to breathe, and yet I can’t!” Zane bursts out, frustrated and frightened. “I’m not supposed to break down like this, I do not, I do not—”

“You’re not a machine,” Cole says steadily. “You get to break down.” 

“But if I—”

“You don’t,” Lloyd murmurs. “You don’t have to turn ‘em off, Zane. You’re one of the strongest people I know.” 

Zane’s head lowers, his eyes shadowed. “It wouldn’t hurt,” he says, but it’s reluctant. 

“Yeah, you’d never hurt, but you’d never be happy, either,” Kai says. “And that’d suck.”

“It’d suck for us, too,” Cole speaks up. “We’d have to live without your laugh. Without your sassy remarks. Without your kindness.”

“We’d live without you,” Lloyd says, quietly. “And you wouldn’t really be living, would you?”

Zane crumples, his shoulders shaking as he allows Kai to pull him close. 

“If it gets too much, just come to us,” Jay says. “We’ll be more, okay? We’re pretty good at that.”

Zane gives a wet, stifled laugh. 

“Don’t go, even if it’s just your emotions leaving,” Nya murmurs, her head against his. “It isn’t worth it.”

With slowing shudders, Zane lets himself relax, the warmth of their little family pressing around him. Kai is an immovable barrier at his side, save for where Lloyd’s tucked beneath his arm. Jay’s legs tangle with Lloyd and Cole’s, his hand held tightly in Nya’s.  

“Leaving isn’t worth it,” Nya echoes. “Not in any lifetime.”

---

Bit by bit, the monastery comes together. 

The smell of new paint gives way to a familiar scent of mixing elements and laundry soap, one that’s followed them since the first Bounty. They comb through every online shop until they find the exact brand of sheets that feel like the first apartment they ever lived in together. Thrift shops and sales and birthdays stock closets once again, new hoodies that are quickly stolen and passed back and forth. The collection of CD’s and movies rebuilds into stacks once again through shared movie nights and pirated music.

And little by little, with the consistent passage of time, photographs line the walls of the monastery once again.

 A little older, a little worn, but a collection of family all the same. 

---

“Except we still don’t have damn central heating—” 

“Suck it up and light the fireplace, hothead.” 

“No respect in this city. None at all.” 

[the-witch-of-one-piece]

Control 18+ Ft: Shuji Hanma, Taiju Shiba, & Ran Haitani WC:1400+ Resident: @enchantedforest-network Synopsis: You belong to them and they have to remind you that when you start to act out. They will put you in your place and you won't fight them doing so. (I wouldn't fight them not one bit 💀) TW: Masturbation (F! reader receiving), Morally Grey Men, Possessive Behavior, Choking, fingering, finger sucking, pet names (baby girl, brat), slight stalking, degrading names (slut), calling them daddy, strong language, dominating trait from the three men, jealousy, you belong to them.

Hanma

“Tsk tsk like I told you to keep your legs open for me.” Hanma cooed in your ear. Your back pressed against his chest.

Your panties were tossed on the floor. Your legs spread slightly open. The way his fingers brush between your slits causes you to squirm uncontrollably. Hanma leaned over your shoulder, his golden eyes gazing at his tattooed hand between your legs. “Just the slightest touch is making you quiver this much?” the cocky tone left his devilish lips as he could feel your juices on the tips of his fingers. 

The way he did it was always a teasing matter, he knew it drove you crazy. “Stop teasing me so much.” biting back the moans as your eyes closed savoring this sinful touch his fingers could do to you. It was hard to separate yourself from him, he came and went when he felt like it. The consistency was never there when you really needed him. You said to yourself you were finally done putting up with his bullshit and mind games. You even questioned your own sanity wondering if he even loved you? If he did… he had a strange way of showing it to you. When you decided to go out with someone different you wouldn’t have guessed he followed you and your company the entire evening. 

Your company wouldn’t even make it into your apartment when Hanma finally had enough of what he liked to call the ‘little game’ you were playing. The poor guy didn’t know what hit him (literally). Hanma with a look in his eyes you could describe them as dangerous and yet sexy, almost making you want to get on your knees in front of him ready to take your punishment. 

 You were putty in the palm of Hanma’s hands and you hated how vulnerable he could make you feel and yet you wanted him to touch you more. Just like a drug, you couldn’t get enough. 

 “Just remember I’m the only one that can make you feel this good.” his fingers pushing more between your slits “Your pretty little cunt is mines and mines only. You thought I was kidding when I said no one else could touch you?” his long slender fingers sliding into your moisten cunt feeling the warmth of your walls. “See I can’t leave you alone for a few days without you acting like such a little slut….You disappointed me.”

“I’m-I’m sorry.” you whimpered as his fingers were pumping in and out of you. His fingers are getting nice and coated with your sweet nectar. “Oh fuck please don’t stop.”

“And if I do? How badly do you want it, my little slut?” 

“Bad Shuji baby~~” you whimpered.

“Tell me who you belong to?” The possessive tone was making its appearance in his voice. He added another finger into your warm little cunt.

“Shuji Hanma~~~” tossing your head back slightly against the lanky man.

Taiju 

“Look at me when I’m talking to you.” Taiju watched you avoid direct eye contact. “We are not done talking.”

“I’m done talking.” You shot him a quick look and began walking to the shared room. You began undoing the expensive dress he bought you just a few days ago for this special event. Where he was sitting, he clicked his tongue and began rolling up his sleeves getting up from his seat following you to the bedroom. 

‘god damn brat.’ Taiju being the observant man a few hours prior the dress looked great on you but he noticed some more unwanted looks. Even Taiju overheard a conversation about you and your dress with a few men he knew. He fucking hated how they were speaking about you. He just wanted to rip their throats out. It took every inch of him to control himself and not make a spectator of himself just like he did when he was younger. You were enjoying yourself but it was being cut short by him. When you asked him he didn’t give you an answer but simply moved you towards the exit. It frustrated you because he wouldn’t even tell you the reason and that's when you became more sassy with him. You weren’t going to look at him. 

It wouldn’t take long for you to hear his footsteps enter your bedroom. The dress slides down your frame as you reach for your silk robe placing it on. “Like I said we are not done talking you damn brat.”

“And I say we are.” you picked up the dress and placed it on the back of the chair. 

It was driving him crazy that you wouldn’t look at him. The large structure man walks towards you. In a quick motion, you were pinned between him and the wall. His large hand pinning both of your hands above your head. Still avoiding to look at him “Even pinning your hands above your head you still can’t look at me.” his large hand was around your neck applying enough pressure to get your attention. “Apparently, I need to wrap my hand around that pretty neck of yours to have you look at me like a good girl.”  Taiju's eyes focused on yours as they traveled to his hand around your neck. He felt his growing bulge forming in his pants. “Look what you do to me. Getting me all worked up..” his voice was low raspy the hint of his bourbon mixed with the cigarette he was smoking lingered on his breath. 

“Now… Are you going to listen to me when I tell you to do something?” he asked you. You didn’t argue as you nodded. “I can't hear you.” the slightly taunting in his voice. 

“Yes daddy.” your eyes are still on his.

“Good girl… Now get on your knees for me and show Daddy how much you love him.”

Ran

Sitting on his lap, it was becoming more apparent he was looking at your left hand more. His fingers seem to play with the ringless ring finger. Ran began picturing what kind of ring he was planning on placing on your finger. “Something on your mind Ran?” Looking at the violet eye lover. His eyes drifted from your ring finger to your doe-eyed expression. “Thinking about what kind of ring will look good on your finger baby girl. I think it’s been long overdue and I want to get it now.” 

You cocked your brow at him “Really now?” with a playful smirk “What makes you think I will wear it now?”

“As my future wife, it will be suitable. You would want to wear the ring your future husband bought now wouldn’t you?” Your fingers combed through his soft smooth short hair. “If I don't?” 

“You will, I will make sure of it.” He reached for your fingers intertwining them with his. Sliding you off his lap onto the couch, his hand still intertwined with yours. You were sliding lower onto the couch as he was hovering over you. “You and I both know well if I place a collar around your neck you wouldn’t remove it or just like when you ride my face until you cum. No one is capable of taking you from me either.”  

He had you right there. No doubt in his mind and he was right you wouldn’t decline anything he wanted to do. He would be able to convince you to walk down the street in lingerie if he wanted to. He had this sort of power over you and it always made you cave in. “I get it, Ran. You know I’m teasing Ran.” you playfully said, “I’m yours.”

Other than the three words he loved hearing, he also loved those two words  “Say it again baby girl.” Lowering his head lower towards your lips lightly brushing against yours. The light touch of his light sent a tingling sensation throughout your body.  

“I’m yours.”  You lifted your head slightly as your lips pressed against his. 

“That’s my girl~” Ran smoothly said to you. Ran freed his hand from yours, his index finger brushing against your bottom lip. The tip of your tongue lightly brushes against the tip of his finger. With no asking from him, your lips began sucking on his finger. “I bet you would be sucking me off so good just like always a baby girl. Seeing those pouty lips around my cock how you take me inch by inch.” he continued to watch you suck on his finger.

Interested in joining the taglist please fill out the form below to get a notification of your favorite characters when they are being posted! Link here ->taglist

Tagging: @the-haitani-baton, @satanlovesusall666, @galactict3a, @ratlovecat, @niko-ash, @iluv-ace, @captainmycaptainn, @strawberrychrome, @missgab, @anxious-chick, @livefromraleigh, @kei-b-gurlll, @spookiisopium, @bontensbabygirl, @txna04, @intheafterall, @stygianoir, @kira-rrh, @intheafterall, @staygoldsquatchling02, @nightqueensk, @alexanderlightwoodii, , @sintyu, @missgab, @elmakimaki_ , @hana-patata, @ancient-vivarium @livefromnc , @mdibby @chronic-claire-universe @cxrxx @drakensdarling, @stephisokay, @lunatical, @q-the-rockaholic, @istanstraykids, @opchara, @twistedw0nd3rland3acc, @galliardsmaniac, @villsophie, @carixes

[creampuffqueen]

Cover Story

Yangvik Week day 1 - fake dating

Summary: At a party in the Earth Kingdom, Yangchen and Kavik are on a mission. When things don't go to plan, they have to think quick to keep their cover.

Word count: 4248

----

“Traveling alongside the Avatar - what an honor!” The older Earth Kingdom nobleman smiles over his glass of rice wine. Kavik forces a smile in return, swirling the liquid in his own glass to obscure just how little he’s drank. This must be the third time he’s heard the same sentence in the last fifteen minutes. 

“Certainly. I enjoy the work.” The rehearsed words fall easily off his tongue, their smooth and gilded façade right at home inside the splendor of the royal ballroom of Ba Sing Se. “I am grateful to be a trusted companion of Avatar Yangchen.”

He goes to take a tiny sip of his drink, hopeful to avoid as much small talk as possible, but finds the wine frozen solid in its glass. Speak of the darkness. 

A subtle motion with his hand is all it takes to unfreeze his drink, allowing him to actually take a sip - though with the delay he knows it now looks like he just drained the glass. Before the nobleman in front of him can comment, though, his eyes are drawn to something behind Kavik’s back. 

Avatar Yangchen steps into place beside Kavik with gentle, measured steps. In the disgusting display of wealth here in the palace, she’s a yellow-and-orange breath of fresh air, both literally and figuratively. Kavik and the others had to dress up to attend this party. Yangchen, being an Air Nomad with no possessions to her name, did not.   

The nobleman bows deeply before her. “Avatar Yangchen, it is a great honor to see you here in the Earth Kingdom.”

Yangchen bows to him in turn; a smaller motion, but no less lacking in respect. “Please, Lord Bozhou, the pleasure is all mine. I do hope you don’t mind, but I must steal my companion away for a moment. We have something to discuss with Lady Gyeshe.”

Lord Bozhou (how Yangchen can remember all these names, Kavik will never know) nods quickly in response. “Of course, Avatar, please. I will miss his invigorating tales, but you must take care of business.”

“Thank you, Lord Bozhou,” Yangchen replies, hooking one of Kavik’s arms with her own. She pivots on her heel and drags him away. To the average onlooker, her pace looks easy and relaxed, but Kavik can sense the tension in her grip and in the way she steps. 

“He’s not going to miss me,” Kavik mutters quietly, trying to ease her with a bit of humor, “I was positively boring to talk to. And so was he, for that matter. Thanks for the save.”

“I didn’t come and get you just to get your sorry butt out of a conversation,” Yangchen whispers, in that eerie way of hers where her mouth hardly moves. “I just got the signal from Jujinta. We need to move quickly, but act as natural as possible.”

Kavik assumed about as much. If it were up to her, she’d revel in his small-talking misery all night. But they aren’t at the royal palace just to brush elbows with nobility. They have a job to take care of.

“You remember the plan?” Yangchen asks from the corner of her mouth as she smiles and nods at a group of Earth Sages they pass. 

Kavik dips his head in acknowledgement at the delegation from Omashu on the other side of the ballroom. “I do. I’ll wait for three and a half minutes exactly, counting from when the door closes.”

Yangchen doesn’t respond verbally, only squeezing his elbow where their arms are linked. The motion pulls them closer than before. Kavik tries not to notice. 

But as they stop to chat with Lady Gyeshe for a few moments, completing their cover story, he can’t help but notice that Yangchen still stays close, letting their shoulders brush together where they stand. 

She’s done nothing different to her appearance tonight. Her robes are the same as always. Her prayer beads lay in the same spot against her chest. Her hair is in its usual braid, swinging low across her back. And yet, Kavik can’t keep his eyes off her. In this room full of beautiful things, she’s still the most captivating.

“Don’t you agree, Kavik?”

Kavik barely manages to hold back a noise of confusion - something he’s had to train hard to achieve. With only a blink to refocus his thoughts, he manages to pull on his fake smile and nod. “Yes, of course I do.”

Yangchen pats his hand softly, one eyebrow raising a fraction of an inch. Nothing gets past her; she clearly knows he wasn’t listening in the slightest. Still, she plays it off with ease, excusing them once again from the conversation and leading Kavik towards the door of the ballroom, arms still linked. 

“Focus, please,” She admonishes as they exit, “We won’t get another chance as good as this one. If I don’t get Feishan some answers he’s going to get antsy, and we both know how that will end.”

“Sorry, I got distracted. It won’t happen again.”

“Distracted by what?” Yangchen asks lightly as they make their way down the grandiose hallway, “You were only looking at me.”

Heat rises in Kavik’s cheeks. He doesn’t answer. 

Thankfully, they arrive at their destination before Yangchen gets a mind to press for a response. The palace of Ba Sing Se is fancy enough that they have designated rooms just for freshening up; one for men and one for women. Nobles have been using the rooms all evening, keeping their looks fresh for a whole night of royal partying. Now it’s Yangchen’s turn.

“I’ll only be a moment,” Yangchen promises aloud, for the benefit of the guard outside the door and the noblewomen already leaving. 

“Please hurry,” Kavik urges in a similar tone, “I want to hear the end of Lord Bozhou’s story.”

Yangchen gives an exaggerated roll of her eyes. “I’ll be as quick as I can. It won’t kill you to stand outside for a minute or two.”

She steps away, and Kavik feels the absence of her at his side like a gaping hole. He’s so focused on her form retreating through the door that he nearly forgets to start counting, and he clenches his fist in frustration at himself. Keep your head on straight, you fool.

It isn’t difficult to feign boredom as he waits. Time passes so much slower when you’re counting each second. When he gets to three minutes he leans against the wall with a heavy sigh and begins to tap his foot. At three minutes and thirty seconds exactly, he pushes off the wall and heads back the way they came, ignoring the judgemental glare of the nearby guard. He can already imagine the gossip that will come from this. Some companion! Abandoning the Avatar at a royal function?!

Instead of heading back into the main ballroom, Kavik passes the grand doorway and keeps heading straight. He passes a few more rooms before he hangs a left, keeping his expression neutral, showing any onlookers only what he wants them to see: a man who knows where he’s going. A man who’s supposed to be there. Confidence is half the battle in infiltration. Act like you’re meant to be there and nobody will question you. 

The amount of royalty, nobility, and generally important people gathered in the ballroom means that the majority of King Feishan’s guards are close to that area. However, the young Earth King is a paranoid man, keeping guards posted all throughout the palace, just in case. But as Kavik makes his way to the target room, he doesn’t encounter a single one. Jujinta’s part has gone off without a hitch. 

Counting doors carefully to ensure he’s in the right place, Kavik at last stops walking, drawing his hand across the thick wooden door that should belong to the office of Minister Xahu.

That is, if he’s correct. He really hopes he’s correct. 

The door is locked, of course. Not an issue, though. A small pouch at his hip, carefully concealed beneath his clothes, contains enough water for him to freeze two long, thin spikes of ice to use as lockpicks. Kavik unlocks the door easily and slips inside the office, returning the water to its container and shutting the door behind him.

Barely a minute later, two small taps sound through the wooden panel, announcing Yangchen’s presence before she lets herself in. She conjures a flame to her open palm, illuminating the small office room around them, casting their shadows on the wall. 

She doesn’t bother with a greeting. “We need to hurry. Juji can only keep the guards distracted for so long without raising a proper alarm. I’ll take the walls in case the minister used earthbending to conceal anything. You take the desk and the bookshelves. Don’t move anything unless you’re sure you can put it back exactly the way it was.”

“I’m not an amateur,” Kavik reminds her, making his way to the desk. 

Yangchen uses her free hand to start tracing along the walls, feeling with her earthbending for any hidden pockets or seals. “I know that. I mean, this ought to feel natural to you at this point. We basically met in a scenario exactly like this one.”

She punctuates her last sentence by winking at him over her shoulder. Kavik refuses to react, even as he feels his cheeks begin to redden. His fumbling hands very nearly knock over a small carved badgermole statue. 

Kavik makes his way along the ornate desk, feeling with one palm for disguised seals or latches and using his other hand to tap a rhythmic pattern on the wood, listening carefully for any area that sounds hollow where it shouldn’t be. 

Nothing. Kavik grits his teeth, keeping his frustration in check. He moves on to search inside the many drawers, taking care not to disturb the contents. 

“Any luck?” Yangchen asks softly. She’s finished her check of the walls and is now inspecting the floor. The slide of her shoes across the polished stone floor makes a quiet rasping noise that prickles the hair on the back of his neck.

“Nothing yet. But these drawers are pretty full of papers. He might have tried to hide the records in plain sight.”

“Doubtful.” Yangchen peers over Kavik’s shoulder, glancing over the masses of files stuffed inside the drawer he has opened. This close, he can feel the ghost of her breath at the crook of his neck, feel the tiny puff of air she releases with every measured exhale. She keeps speaking, but Kavik finds it hard to focus on her words.

“Minister Xahu is the linchpin of this entire thing. He has spirits know how many people expecting their due, and he’s managed to keep it concealed from the Earth King for this long. Those records would have to be detailed, every copper piece accounted for. And he wouldn’t risk another minister or one of the aids accidentally stumbling upon them. They have to be hidden somewhere in this room.”

Somehow, Kavik manages to find his wits in order to give a proper answer. “You’re probably right. Let’s keep looking.” Yangchen pulls away from his shoulder and it takes everything in him not to utterly deflate in disappointment. 

With the desk proving a failure, Kavik heads to the bookshelves while Yangchen makes another pass around the walls. He lets himself fall into his usual rhythm, one developed years ago during his time as an errand runner in Bin-Er. Move quick. Keep your eyes open. Leave no trace.

Though, his jobs in Bin-Er rarely had such high stakes.

Almost six months ago, King Feishan had contacted Yangchen to report a discrepancy in the amount of gold he was receiving from the shang cities. He’d demanded the Avatar’s presence to prove his claims, so Yangchen and Kavik begrudgingly made the journey to Ba Sing Se. The first of many, as it turned out.

Feishan had the two of them count every last piece of gold he received in his latest payment and compare it to the reports they’d sent alongside it. A non-insignificant portion was missing. The king was furious. 

Now, they’ve nearly cracked the conspiracy. One of the king’s own economic ministers, a man named Xahu, has been allowing the shangs to siphon off city funds for themselves - and making his own pocket significantly heavier in the process. He demands a portion from each shang, as payment for keeping their theft off the records.

However, in order to keep track of exactly how much money is going where, Minister Xahu is certain to have his own set of highly detailed records. It isn’t easy to fool both the Earth King and the Avatar, and if the mission goes as planned, the minister will soon be seeing why.

Unfortunately, in order to justice to be enacted, the mission has to be a success - and the minister must be none the wiser that record of his activity has gone missing. At least, not until he’s put to trial.

Kavik is beginning to lose hope. Yangchen is on her third sweep of the office walls, and the flame in her palm is beginning to stutter. Not with exhaustion, but with frustration. Kavik himself has had even less success. Nothing in the desk, nothing in the bookshelf. The minister keeps his office sparsely decorated. They’re running out of things to search.

Yangchen flicks her wrist and the flame in her palm pulses bright, letting Kavik see the thin line of her lips, the deep furrow of her brow as she decides what they should do next. The glow from the fire makes her gray eyes look like molten pools of silver. For a moment, Kavik nearly forgets where he is.

“The plant. We haven’t searched the plant yet.” Yangchen brushes past him, making a beeline towards the towering fern in the corner by the door. Kavik spins on his heel and follows her, ready to assist in whatever way she needs.

With a swift motion, Yangchen grabs the packed soil in the ceramic pot and lifts, heaving the chunk of earth into the air. Instantly Kavik can see they’ve found their spot. A deep indentation is molded into the bottom of the dirt, roots growing around a distinctly block-shaped empty space. Kavik reaches into the pot and pulls out a dirt-covered wooden box.

Yangchen replaces the plant and the pair get to work, silently in sync. Kavik forms his ice-picks once more to unlock the box, and it opens easily under his practiced touch. The minister clearly thought he hid his secrets well enough that he only needed one lock.

The inside of the box is packed full with papers, an informant’s wildest dream. Kavik takes the top half and Yangchen the bottom, and together they sift through the papers at a breakneck pace, taking only the papers with the most damning evidence. Large sums, locations, actual names. Xahu has tried to play the game, but the older minister clearly knows very little about properly guarding secrets. Even the most amateur broker in Bin-Er knows not to use anything or anyone’s true name unless absolutely necessary. Kavik feels a bit like punching the wall. This is the man that robbed the Earth King right under their noses?

In only a few minutes, they’ve skimmed through the whole stack of records. Yangchen takes their evidence and tucks it into her robes, hiding the bulk of paper beneath the very forgiving outline of her Air Nomad clothing. Kavik puts the rest of the paper back into the box and relocks it. Yangchen lifts the plant again to let him replace the box into its hiding spot, cleans up the spilled dirt, and -

“We got it!”

Her arms are around his shoulders before he even realizes it, flinging herself at him with a wide grin, trusting he’ll catch her. Kavik’s hands land at her waist, holding her close for the brief moment of her hug. A triumphant smile of his own tugs at the corner of his mouth, the euphoric feeling of a job well done warming his chest. 

Still smiling, Yangchen reaches up a hand to tousle his hair fondly, making Kavik scrunch his nose in mock annoyance, even as his grin remains firmly affixed to his face. “Hey, it took me forever to get my hair to look this nice!”

Yangchen just ruffles his hair again, rolling her eyes. “I like it better this way.” 

Any retort Kavik had planned dies on his lips, his tongue suddenly refusing to make words as heat blooms in his cheeks. He watches, almost in slow motion, as Yangchen’s gaze veers away from his face. His ears - she must be looking at his ears, they’re probably bright red now and -

A palm slaps over his mouth. “Quiet! There’s someone outside.”

Kavik could kick himself. We just wasted so much time!

Yangchen steps out of his arms, nearly flattening herself against the door as she presses her ear to it. Kavik follows suit, straining to listen through the thick wood.

Sure enough, muffled voices can be heard, growing louder as the people advance down the hallway.

“Ready to get back to the party?” The first voice Kavik doesn’t recognize, but the accent is Upper Ring; the person must be nobility or close to it. Heavy footfalls nearly obscure the reply of the second person, but Kavik focuses with everything he has and manages to catch the second half of it.

“ - a moment, I need to check something in my office while we’re down here. Don’t wait, I won’t be long.”

Kavik’s stomach falls what feels like the height of the Northern Air Temple. The voice is unmistakable; he’s sat through enough miserable meetings with the man.

Minister Xahu is coming to check his office. The office where he and Yangchen currently are, stealing records that will get him sent to prison if discovered. 

Yangchen turns to face him with a blank stare. She doesn’t have a plan for this. They assumed the minister would stay in the ballroom all night. He’d have no reason to travel this far into the palace, not with all the food, drink, and dancing he could want in one place. 

Evidently, they were wrong. There’s no time to waste.

Kavik grabs the heavy chair from the minister’s desk and braces it beneath the door handle. That should buy them a bit of time as the minister struggles to push open the door. “Yangchen, is there any way you can earthbend us out of here?”

“Not without destroying the palace’s structural integrity,” She hisses in reply, beginning to pace. “And the walls aren’t thick enough for me to seal us inside, either.”

The office is sparse. There’s nowhere to hide. What excuse could they possibly give that would hold up their cover? Kavik’s mouth goes dry at the footsteps outside grow closer.

“Hang on, I’ve got an idea.” Yangchen grabs Kavik by both hands and drags him over to the desk. “You’re not going to like it. But trust me on this.”

“I think we’re a bit past caring about how I feel about a plan; tell me what it is.”

“You need to kiss me.”

“What?!”

Did he drink too much back in the ballroom? Did that plant have some kind of hallucinogen in its leaves? Did Yangchen actually just ask him to kiss her -

The door handle rattles, startling both of them. Yangchen’s head whips back and forth between him and the door. “Come on, it’s the only kind of cover that will make any sense!”

“But - I - what?”

The door handle rattles again. The chair budges a fraction of an inch. They’re running out of time. 

“Oh for spirits’ sake, I’ll do it then.”

Yangchen grabs both sides of his face and crashes their mouths together into the best kiss Kavik has ever had. 

Her lips are soft and warm and plush, pliable as they press into his, one hand coming up to tangle into his hair. Kavik stops breathing for half a second before instinct takes over and he’s kissing her back, imagining, if only for a moment, that any of this is real. Yangchen tugs at his hair and Kavik chokes on a gasp. She pulls him closer; his senses are overwhelmed by her. The scent of lemon on her hair, the heat of her body through her robes. He’s never been close to her like this before. He pushes her against the desk as the door finally swings open. 

“What is the meaning of this?!”

Kavik is loathe to pull away, but he does anyway, wondering what they must look like from the minister’s perspective. Blushing faces, wandering hands, messy hair - every bit the young, overeager couple caught in the act. 

“Oh! M-Minister Xahu!” Yangchen stumbles over her words, face flushed bright red. “What are you doing here?”

Kavik can tell the exact moment the minister realizes who he’s just stumbled upon. His green eyes nearly bulge out of his head and his eyebrows almost disappear into his hairline - impressive, considering how far its receded. 

“Avatar Yangchen! My… apologies for the interruption.” The man’s jaw twitches, clearly unsure of how to proceed. A typical couple would be reprimanded and punished for trespassing in such a high level area. But this isn’t a typical couple. This is the Avatar and her companion.

Finally, the minister seems to have decided to treat Yangchen as the Avatar. He bows deeply before them, the couple still tangled together on his desk, and does his best to sound polite when he next speaks. 

“Well, Avatar, this happens to be my office.”

Yangchen gives a surprised little gasp, covering her mouth with her hand. It’s one of the fakest sounds Kavik has ever heard her make. “Oh, I’m so sorry! I didn’t think - I mean, I didn’t realize this office would be needed this evening. You see, I just needed a bit of time away from the party and I asked Master Kavik to accompany me -”

“I understand perfectly,” Minister Xahu interrupts through gritted teeth. Kavik wonders just how much gossip is going to come from this. How long before news of this reaches the shang cities?

“Well, we should leave you in peace, Minister,” Yangchen says, pushing out of Kavik’s embrace and making a beeline for the door. She smooths her robes out as she walks, a flustered young woman trying to appear respectable - and not at all the spymaster checking to ensure the documents are still secured in her pocket. She gestures for Kavik to follow and he does as quickly as possible, eager to escape the fiery glare of the minister. 

Yangchen bows to him in the doorway, peering up at him with imploring eyes. “I trust this… misunderstanding will not be mentioned to others here at the palace?”

“Certainly, Avatar; you have my word.” Kavik bites his lip to hold back a scoff of disbelief.

“Well, in that case, we must be going. Have a wonderful evening!” Yangchen grabs Kavik’s elbow and leads him away, a strange repetition of the way they walked to the office the first time. 

It’s only after they turn the corner that both benders relax, Yangchen letting out an audible sigh of relief. “Good. He bought it.”

“Yeah. Quick thinking.”

She knocks their shoulders together, a small smile curling at the edges of her lips. “You did well, too. Good job making it look so real.”

Kavik can’t meet her eyes. His heart is still pounding too hard. “It was whatever. No problem.”

Yangchen pats at her outer robe again, making sure she still has the papers. “Now we can bring these to King Feishan, as well as the other shangs. We can finally put an end to this nonsense.” 

She keeps talking, but Kavik isn’t listening, not anymore. His focus is honed in on her lips, on the curve of her smile, on the flick of her tongue as she forms her words. He kissed that smile a few minutes ago. He kissed her because she asked him to, and he wants to etch the memory of it into his brain. 

He doesn’t know if he’ll get to kiss her again. Yangchen is clearly unaffected by it; just another matter of business for her. Kavik wonders if it’s stupid of him to hope she’ll ask him to kiss her again, even just for a cover story. 

“Hey, are you alright?”

Kavik jolts at the question. “Hm?”

“You’re not listening. There’s something on your mind. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong,” he promises, willing himself to believe it. If he believes it, she won’t be able to tell that he’s lying. “I’m just still in shock we pulled that off, even with the hitch in the plan. Things rarely go that smoothly for us.”

Yangchen snorts in agreement, and Kavik’s heart flutters at the sound. “You can say that again. Come on, we’ve been away from the ballroom for a while. I’m sure we’ve been missed.”

They still walk with arms linked, even though the rules of propriety don’t require it at this point. It’s like neither can bear to let go. They step over the threshold of the ballroom as one, back into the gilded room of beautiful lies. Yangchen leans over to murmur something into his ear.

“You know,” She breathes from the edge of her mouth, a whisper of a whisper, “You’re not a bad kisser, Kavik.”

[cherrypieangels]

[clip from episode 8 season 2 “Drive With a Dead Girl”]

INCOMING TRUCOOP SCENE ANALYSIS!!!

this scene always kills me with the angst and not enough people talk about it </3

harry never doubted dale during the entire investigation. no matter how out of the box or weird coop’s methods were he was ALWAYS extremely on board with it all! even going so far as to defend cooper when people pointed it out.

it honestly stunned me a bit seeing harry get to his limit and do the exact same thing everyone else had been doing to cooper the entire series ): it’s so obvious that cooper trusted harry enough at this point to tell him about his dreams without the fear of being looked at like he was crazy…

the way harry speaks to him is still so kind despite how worked up he was getting. he tries to be gentle, even putting his soft hands on cooper to comfort him in some way. he knew that the honesty was going to be too much again. he didn’t really mean what he was saying.

i love how you can tell that it hurts harry to say these things out loud as much as it hurts cooper having to stand there and hear it. you can see cooper taking it in but as soon as harry mentions tibet his heart drops. the way he tries to hide his frown by the end but can’t UGHHH harry was the last person cooper expected to feel misunderstood by.

what’s worst is that dale found so much comfort in the town of twin peaks to the point where he’s ready to move in when he has the chance. he sees twin peaks/the sheriff’s station as a place where he’s openly welcomed so i can totally see why dale makes the “outsider” comment. this was the first time we hear harry not so subtly remind cooper that he’s the one in charge at the station since it’s his home and his job. it was almost as if that entire conversation reminded cooper that he is “out of place”AGAIN!!! i felt so bad for him…especially since it’s obvious that people see him as this off putting/weird person despite him literally just living his horrifying truths & being a good person.

i also think it says A LOT that cooper didn’t stay to try to argue or defend his stance. usually he’d be quick to counterpoint but the fact that he simply agrees so he can leave the conversation is SO SAAD he couldn’t even give him a fake smile before he left the scene ):

i wouldn’t have thought much about it except afterwards you can clearly see regret on harry’s face… he knew he had made a mistake. also i noticed that later that night cooper calls the sky “starless” and speaks to diane about how the ending of the case gets super difficult while a piece of comfort pie sits on his bedside table ):

they care about each other so much WAHHH

[thewulf]

Who Did This To You? Pt 2 || Rafe Cameron

Summary: Request - Rafe fic based on song wait in the truck by Hardy. Basically he sees her one night that he’s going for a drive to calm down picks her up and drives to the house of maybe her dad or boyfriend and shoots them... Read Rest Here

A/N: Had to write a part two. Thanks for the inspo @loving-and-dreaming !!

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Maybank!Reader

Word Count: 1.7k+

“You did what?” You tried, but failed at, stopping your jaw from literally hitting the ground as you looked between your brother and Rafe. Neither looked too terribly thrilled to be in the presence of the other. You would’ve felt the same a night prior. But now? Now all you wanted to do was hide into Rafe’s arms. He made you feel safe, protected, secure. A different kind of feeling than when you were with your friends.

Rafe looked away from you quickly. Almost ashamed? Your head snapped back to your brother who looked terribly uncomfortable.

“JJ?” You asked him.

JJ shrugged only muttering, “Piece of shit got what he had coming for him.” Earning a small huff and grin from the other man in the room. JJ looked back up to your eyes only softening seeing your distressed state. As awful as a human as he was he was still your father. Was your father.

“Rafe?” You asked turning your attention back towards the man you never thought you’d have any good will towards. Yet here you were. Pining over the man. A man that even JJ would have to accept. How could he not? He’d quite literally saved your life last night. There was no way you were going to make it all the way to John B’s place.

Rafe sighed looking back up at you with that same softness that JJ was just exuding, “He almost killed you. I just, I don’t…” He paused, sighing once more before forcing a hand through his tangled hair, “He would’ve killed you if I didn’t get to him first Y/N.” He stated matter of factly as if to justify his own actions.

You sat down on the chair surrounding Rafe’s kitchen table, “Wow.” Your brain couldn’t think of any words to speak as it reeled over the events of the last few hours, “What about you?” The panic kicked in forcing you to jump up from the seat and back over to the much taller boy, “Are you going to get in trouble?” You asked looking at him with pleading eyes. You’d never dream of putting him in this spot. Putting anybody in such a spot.

He shook his head before gently brushing your own tangled hair out of your face, “It’s taken care of, don’t worry about it.” He refrained from going ‘too far’ in front of your older brother. Rafe knew JJ was a hothead, much like himself. Much different than the gentle soul that you were. A natural balance to his chaos.

“Are you sure?” You asked once more, afraid you could lose him just as quickly as you had gotten him.

He nodded, “Positive. Don’t worry about it.”

You turned back towards your brother, “What about us? Where are we going to go?”

“I’ll drop out. Get a job. Be your caretaker.” He shrugged as if it was as simple as that. Oh, how you wish it were that simple.

But you simply shook your head walking back over to him, “You can’t do that JJ.”

He smiled over to you trying his best to stay as calm as possible for you. It was natural that neither of you had felt much for the man. He was simply a body that took care of the bills at this point. But that was now gone. The two of you had to fend for yourself just like John B was currently doing. How in the hell had both your dads died within the span of a few months?

“You and I both know I’m never leaving this island. What’s it matter if I graduate school? I’ll get my GED and call it a day.” He pulled you in for a rare hug. One that he knew you needed by the way you were tensed up. He knew how off kilter your life had just been swung into.

“But JJ…” You started before he shook his head interrupting you mid-sentence. Rafe walked behind you giving you some distance, letting you have this conversation with your brother.

“It’s been figured out.” He finally let his bear hug grip on you go before looking down at his phone before sighing, “Look, gotta go pick JB and Sarah up. Going to fill them in. Don’t worry about it Y/N. Let us handle it, okay?”

You nodded, “I’m sixteen JJ, not five. I can help.” Letting out a frustrated sigh JJ just shook his head again before wrapping you up in another loving hug. He knew you needed it. He reserved these hugs just for moments like these. When your world was threatening to topple down right in front of you. He couldn’t bear it. You were one of the few consistent things in his life that always, no matter what, believed and cheered him on. His own personal ball of sun. He couldn’t let that diminish. No, he’d rather die than let that happen.

“You’re still my little sister. No matter what, yeah?” He grinned while punching you on the arm lightly. He didn’t know where you were hurting but he knew you certainly were. You were bruised and scratched from head to toe. JJ tried not to let his eyes linger on the particularly nasty bruises or scrapes. It should’ve been him. He should’ve been there for you. His worst fear come right to life in front of him. The sunshine that you were had been hit over and over again. JJ couldn’t help to feel like he had failed you.

Bobbing your head up and down you couldn’t help but to smile at him, “Yeah, okay.”

“Atta girl.” He walked towards the front door, “I’ll pick you up later?” He looked back and forth between you and Rafe who finally decided to step in.

“No need. I’ll drop her off at John B’s?” He asked as he walked towards your brother not letting you step in. It was odd having a male figure be so caring towards you. Not that JJ wasn’t. He was just your older brother who made you tough. He wasn’t always the one you wanted to cry to. He wasn’t your shoulder to lean on when everything was tumbling down. He was the one that was always there to build you back up. He was your brother. Your JJ. Your world and your starts. Your best friend. The person you needed most. JJ.

Your brother gave him a quick nod, “Sure.” He turned back towards you as his hand tugged at the doorknob, “Text me when you’re on your way.”

“Sounds good JJ. I’ll see you later.” You waved as he opened and shut the door quickly leaving you alone again with Rafe. He was quick. In and out in thirty minutes. Changing your life in thirty minutes. He might’ve just changed it for the better though. It might be naïve of you to think JJ could pull this off but why couldn’t he? He was always resourceful when he needed to be.

Feeling a gentle hand on your shoulder you were tugged out of your thoughts immediately, “Are you alright?” Rafe asked quietly seeing you stuck in your head.

You turned to look up to him with wide eyes, “I’m… Yeah I’m fine.” You sucked in a breath suddenly feeling incredibly awkward under his gaze. His very intense Kook stare you were terribly used to.

He frowned as he studied your nervous expression. Were you scared of him because he killed your father? JJ left you here so he couldn’t be worried. But were you?

Rafe decided to test the waters and reach out a hand to you. Without a second thought you brought your hand to his bringing his confidence up just a little. He tugged at your arm gently knowing you were in pretty serious pain. You complied following his to the couch. He pulled you into his side. He ran his hand along your back trying to calm your racing heart.

“It’s okay if you’re not okay.” Rafe whispered in your ear as he laid his head atop of yours.

You nodded into his chest feeling him wrap his arms around your waist pulling you ever so much closer, “I’m confused and a little sad. But I’m okay.”

He gave your hip a squeeze, “I’ll be here for you. Every step of the way.”

You let his words process in your head before finally speaking once again, “Why?” You just had to ask. It was eating at you, “Why do you care now?”

He didn’t let you go, only held you tighter, “I’ve always cared. I just didn’t know how to express it. Being uh… mean to you made it easier. My friends stayed away. They’re trouble. I’m trouble. You really shouldn’t want much to do with me Y/N.”

You sighed only letting your head fall completely onto his chest, “Yeah sure, whatever. My life’s already kind of fucked up isn’t it Rafe? Why not got all in?”

He smiled down you cuddled into him, “Because I care for you. Always have. Always will Maybank.” He began brushing your hair wish his fingers trying to tame it from the restless sleep you had the night prior.

You groaned, “I suppose I care for you to Rafe, please don’t go running away from me now.”

He shook his head, “Not unless you ask me. But don’t say I didn’t warn you sweet girl.”

You couldn’t help the creeping blush at that nickname he’d given you overnight, “Well, we’re in luck. Because that won’t happen.” You grinned up at him feeling that warmth you felt earlier spread around again, “Thank you Rafe.” You mumbled feeling sleepiness begin to take over you once more.

He kept brushing your hair hoping you’d fall asleep on him once again. Knowing full well your body needed the sleep to help recover after such an assault, “Anytime pretty. You know that.” He hoped in fact you did know that. Even though you’d been strangers moments prior he hoped you knew how much you really meant to him. He’d admired you from a distance hoping the cold shoulder would lead you away from him. And that worked until he saw you broken on the side of the rode. Rafe could never leave you to fend for yourself like that.

You mumbled something incoherent to his ears as you dozed off once again. He wasn’t sure how long you’d be asleep, but he was sure he wouldn’t move an inch hoping you’d get the best sleep you possibly could. He was a goner and he couldn’t really give less of a damn in that moment as you were curled up on him

Permanent Taglist (Message me or comment below if you want to be added!): @loving-and-dreaming @kmc1989 @memeorydotcom @matisse556 @buckylov3r @taygrls @ah-blossom @hardballoonlove @rosiahills22 @djs8891

Fic Taglist: @starkeysheart @f4ll-for-you @thesnailus

[daryltwdixon]

The Ruins of Us: Chapter 10

Summary: the group begins a full fledged search for Sophia in the woods, when they come up to an abandoned church. You end up overhearing another conversation between Lori and Shane, and finally fess up to Daryl that he'd been right all along. In a flashback, you remember a time you went out during the first few weeks of college with your effeminate roommate, when you see a familiar face in the crowd.

warnings: mentions of ED (not reader), alcohol consumption

The pale blue horizon had streaks of yellow sunlight peeking through the clouds as you opened your eyes the next morning. Your back was killing you–you had stayed in one of the leftover cars on the highway to get a couple hours of shut eye as best you could. You got better shut-eye a few days ago at the CDC, and since then any noise outside the windows jostled you awake at night. You begin to sit up, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes with your fists, when you hear hushed voices outside the vehicle.

“I know how she is— she thinks she can handle things on her own, but I’ve seen her fall apart more times than I can count,” it’s Shane’s voice outside your window, and you keep your head low to keep listening.

“How do you even know that girl, Shane? What happened? She looks familiar, but I can’t place her. Did we speak to her on a patrol together or somethin’?” Rick’s voice comes out in a hushed, curious whisper. You knew he couldn’t have completely forgotten who you were yesterday. At some point his memory had to come back to him, as foggy as it may be after the time that has gone by. You peek your eyes out the window just enough to get a glimpse of Shane’s face, it's contorted in a way you can tell he’s working out what to say in his head. His brows are furrowed, and he runs his hand through his hair while resting the other on his hip. 

“Yeah, I knew her before this all went down. We crossed paths a few times–she’s from around the area. Nothin’ serious. She was stuck in a bad place back then, couldn’t really take care of herself so I kept her out of trouble when I could. Didn’t think it was necessary to explain,” he says. You duck your head back under the window, a tightness rising up your throat. There's a long pause before either of them say anything again.

“That’s it? Just crossed paths? You looked at her like there was a lot more to it than that, Shane. You called her a pet name , dammit. What aren’t you tellin’ me?” Rick sounds more and more aggressive as he goes on. Amazement at how perceptive Rick was flashes through your mix of emotions, although you admit the first time you and Shane saw each other again wasn’t all that reserved when he brought you into a hug that day. God, it felt so long ago already. There’s another long pause, you can imagine Shane is searching his brain for a reason good enough for his facade. 

“She didn’t want me talkin’ about it. You know how people can get about their past. I wasn’t gon’ go around tellin’ stories to anyone who would listen, Rick. It doesn't even matter–what matters is she’s here now and we’ve gotta figure out how to find Sophia. We don’t have time to dig into the past when the dead are walkin’ around.” 

You can hear Rick’s quiet agreement, and their footsteps recede. 

That motherfucker.

After all that time, all that pain, he acts like you were just another face he barely knew. That you were some kid who couldn’t look after herself. How the hell does he explain the tension between him and Daryl then? Your breathing is shallow as the thoughts race through your mind. Protecting his own damn image, taking control of the situation–it was all typical you realize. Looking back at everything, he always kept you hidden away in the dark. Literally in the middle of the night, every single time. Never taking you to busy public places, never introducing you to his friends. The intensity of the emotions hits you like a spark of flame–your fists ball up as you try to keep yourself together. You need to get moving, the search party is about to start looking for the little girl, and you can’t go out there like this. How are you supposed to let him get away with acting like you were nothing to him? I should've known better, you think to yourself. Should’ve listened to Daryl when he said Shane was bad news. But you’re here now, and Shane is right about one thing–it’s too much to bring up when you have to find Sophia. For now, you shove –hard– at the thought, putting it in a neat little box in your brain with a lock on it. 

Your stomach growls loudly, shaking you from your thoughts. Your mind switches back to survival mode, the need for food and water apparent. You shift yourself up into the sitting position, and exit the car. 

As you approach, everyone is gathered around a sedan, Rick laying out a roll of an arsenal of weapons. 

“Everyone takes a weapon,” he announces. You step up next to Daryl, giving him a small smile. His hand comes up to you, offering a piece of beef jerky. You take it with eagerness, ripping a piece off with your teeth. The salty, dry taste feels so good on your tongue. You say a small thanks to him, and face the group.

“These aren’t the kind of weapons we need,” Andrea retorts, looking at the hammers and tools on the hood of a car, “What about the guns?”

“We’ve been over that,” Shane interjects, “Rick and I will be carrying. Daryl too,” his eyes flicker over to you, “we can’t have people popping off rounds every time a tree rustles,”

“It’s not the trees I’m worried about,” she says to him.

“Say someone fires at the wrong moment–herd happens to be passin’ by,” his eyes are back on her, “See–then it’s game over for all of us. So you need to get over it,” he says in an authoritarian tone.

“I’ve been trained to use a gun, why can’t I have one?” you pipe in, looking down at the ground.

“Yeah, shootin’ squirrels in the backwoods of bumblefuck Georgia,” Shane snarks at you.

“Isn’t that where we are now?” you retort, looking up at him with your eyes narrowed.

“Not happening,” he says simply, ending the conversation.

Daryl stares quietly, his jaw flexing as he watches the both of you argue. Rick is looking at Daryl too now, waving him on to tell the plan. Without any other words from you or Shane, he begins to talk about going up the creek to find Sophia. You walk up to the car and grab a hammer, it’s heavy but feels good in your hand. You practice swinging it to get the hang of the weight.

“Stay quiet, stay sharp,” Rick orders as everyone walks away, putting together packs of food and water. You take a generous swig of a bottle before putting it into a small bag over your shoulder. 

You can overhear a heated discussion going on with Andrea and Dale, but feel it’s probably best to keep your distance. You doubt they want another person’s two cents in the conversation. As she joins everyone again, you begin walking, taking up behind Daryl who has his crossbow over his shoulder. Rick is behind you at a safe distance. You all quietly follow in a single line after each other for a while, and after an hour or so of walking at a steady pace, Daryl lifts his hand behind him, getting everyone down on the ground. Crouching, you let Rick go ahead of you to walk with him and see a lone tent up ahead. Shane brushes up against you as he tries to pass as well. The three of them come up to the tent with hesitation, and you hold your breath as Daryl approaches with his knife at the ready. Carol slowly walks up, calling for Sophia. 

With no response, Daryl makes his way into the tent. You grab the wrist of whoever is next to you–you can’t even tell who it is and you don’t care. You have an iron grip on them, pleading for there not to be anything dangerous in the tent. Let it just be Sophia, please. But then Daryl comes out of the tent, standing up straight.

“Not her,” he says simply, a small gun in his hand. You drop your hand, and look over to see Glenn looking at you with wide eyes. 

You offer a small smile, “sorry,” 

He doesn’t respond, and looks toward the other guys by the tent. Turns out the person in the tent “opted out” as Jenner once put it. But suddenly you hear church bells, and everyone stands at attention, trying to search for the source of the sound. Everyone starts to run toward the noise, and out of the clearing in the woods you see a cemetery with a small church attached. Rick sprints to the door, and when everyone is behind him, he begins slowly opening it, ready for the worse. You stay back behind the men, hatchet ready in your hand. There’s a few walkers that turn and hiss when they see the group. Immediately you’re inside, ready to strike. You manage to jump in front of one that Shane is aiming for, slamming your hatchet down in its head. You stand as the walker falls down, looking up at Shane with a challenge blazing in your eyes. 

“Can’t handle myself, huh?” you ask quietly. His eyes narrow on you as well, but when the room is quiet with the lack of walkers snarling, you look back over to Daryl asking the statue of Jesus for requests, which brings a small smile of humor to your face. Why is it in the worst situations, he can make you laugh? You barely can tell if he means to. He screams for Sophia then, and you are reminded to start looking around the place. The short row of pews is empty, there’s no girl here. If she was there’s no way she could have handled those walkers anyway. Shane is approaching Rick, demanding that it’s the wrong church. No steeple, no bells, he tells him. But then the ringing chimes loudly above you and everyone is running outside. Glenn runs to the side of the building to the speaker the noise is blaring from, reaching down to the switch at the bottom.

“Timer, it’s on a timer,” Daryl says, defeatedly. Everyone seems to exhale, but more in despair than relief. Although the bells stopped and the noise is no longer going to draw anything in, you still feel the disappointment fill the air around you. 

Daryl falls to the side of the building, sitting and leaning his head back against the siding, letting his eyes softly shut. Letting out another sigh, you fall beside him, your head resting on the heels of your hands. You sit there for a long moment in silence, before you look at him, contemplating if you want to say what’s on your mind. He looks so defeated, so sad. You can tell the loss of the little girl is getting to him. He’s a tracker, he can find almost anything out in the woods. You wonder if he’s feeling inadequate in moments like this.

He seems to sense that there’s something on the tip of your tongue, “what is it?” he says softly, opening one eye to look at you. When you are still hesitant, he opens both his eyes and turns his head to look at you, “what?” he whispers again.

“You were right,” you admit, looking at him in his blue eyes that match the color of the sky today.

“Usually am,” he smirks, “‘bout what this time?”

Before you can open your mouth to speak, you both turn your heads in the direction you hear Shane’s voice coming from. He’s to your left, in front of the church building stairs. You can see Lori standing a few feet from him. Their voices are coming out aggravated, almost urgent.

“Are you really leaving?” you hear Lori asking.

“Don’t you think it’s best for all of us?” Shane’s voice questions. Daryl looks over at you, eyes searching your face for any kind of answers. You shake your head lightly, as if to say you have no clue what’s going on, and look toward the noise again. You can only see the back of Lori as she speaks to him. You can still only really pick up pieces of the conversation. Shane is completely out of view but you can pick up his voice here and there. Lori seems to want him to leave, but she’s not happy with him.

“Just tryna be the good guy here, Lori,” Shane says so quietly you can barely hear it, and you roll your eyes at that, “none of this was intended ,” he finishes. 

Lori leaves the corner of the building, walking what you assume is Shane in front of the church. Their voices are still in hushed whispers, talking over each other. You hear Rick and Carl’s name come up, but never yours.

“ I’m the one that loses you,” Shane says to her. You start to see Lori coming back into view, but she heads up to the steps of the church instead of around the building. Everything is quiet again.

Daryl looks back at you, his expression hard. 

“About that,” you exhale, closing your eyes and leaning your head back. 

———————————————————————————

“Y’all gonna follow the creek bed back,” Shane announces, “Daryl, you’re in charge,” 

“You’re splittin’ us up?” Daryl asks, his eyes narrowing, “you sure about that?” 

The group has formed back together after a couple of bites of what you all packed in your bags today before you left the highway–you and Daryl shared the rest of the jerky he had and a can of beans between the two of you. The sun was on its way down for the second half of the day. You knew you only had so many hours of daylight left to find Sophia. 

You stand next to the others as Shane and Rick explain they’re going to stay back and keep watch for her to appear–maybe she heard the bells and came running but hasn’t made it yet. Daryl’s voice is worried when he asks Shane about his plan. 

“Yeah, we’ll catch up to you,” Shane says easily.

As you start turning to walk away with the others, he suddenly calls out, “Y/N, you comin’?” 

It takes you a moment to register that Shane is calling your name. You nearly gawk at him, what the hell?

“Sorry?” you say to him, not sure you heard him right. Your tone is laced with disbelief.

Daryl’s jaw tightens as he looks over at you, chewing the inside of his lip. You look between him and Shane, uncertain about the change in attitude towards yourself. You don’t make a move to leave Daryl’s side. 

“Don’t want you wanderin’ off tryna look for Sophia yourself again, now do we? Want you in my sight,” he says to you. 

First of all, you’re amazed he’s trying to demand things of you in front of the group–it’ll put a clear target on you that Shane thinks you’re not capable of handling yourself, although he did make it clear to Rick this morning that was really what he thought of you. And second–since when does he want you around him? Hadn’t he made it clear that you needed to steer clear of anything having to do with him?

“Come on now,” he calls you over, his fingers twitching to beckon you forward. You look up at Daryl, who, instead of focusing on you now, is glaring at Shane. Lori is watching you too, confusion in her eyes. You could swear it looks as if Daryl is about to stop you from moving forward as he begins to lean forward. But he seems to think better of himself from the look on Shane’s face, and stops himself from making any moves. You slowly make your way over to him and Rick. Standing between them with your hatchet in your hand, Carl calls out he wants to come too. Surprisingly, his mom looks to you and the men you stand between, then lets him come along with you. You smile gently at Carl while he makes his way over. He really is a cute kid. 

The group starts to break apart, the women and Glenn heading away. Daryl stands still after handing Lori the extra gun he found, staring down Shane. Both of them are stock still as Rick excuses himself into the church. You reach out to grab Shane’s arm, and you're struck by the ease in which you feel comfortable enough to do it, even after the past few days’ events. You hate that you didn’t stop yourself, realizing it was a mistake. Daryl’s trance breaks as he sees your hand wrap around Shane’s bicep. As you’re pulling his arm away, Shane looks down at your hand, up at you, then to Daryl with a shit eating smirk, and starts walking with you. 

“Wipe the smirk off your face, Shane,” you mumble, releasing his arm once he starts moving.

“You and I both know you still need me, whether you want to admit it or not,” he says with a cocky look in his eye, passing you to walk towards the woods. You’re half tempted to flip him off behind his back. You glance behind you to reassure Daryl, but his back is already turned, walking to catch up with the rest of the group.

x Flashback x

When your roommate Dana said she was taking you to a “dive bar” as you were getting ready to leave on that Friday night, you hadn’t really imagined she meant an actual dive bar. You had met her your first day, naturally, as you were unpacking your only two bags in the dorm room. She immediately took to you like a magnet, making you try on all her clothes and doing your makeup how she thought you’d look best. You were her “little project” as she liked to call you. 

The thing was, Dana was from Fulton County for god’s sake, so you thought she’d keel over when she saw the state of the dive bar you knew well from home. You were surprised when she was the one who mentioned going to Henderson’s Bar. It was well known for never once being cleaned, the music old, but the drinks were cheap. You knew of the place, but never wanted to go in, afraid of creeps that smelled like beer and body odor trying to climb all over you. But when you walked in tonight next to Dana arm and arm with you, you were surprised to see it packed with college students. There was a small DJ stand in the corner playing club music, and a large crowd taking up the majority of the space dancing and grinding together. Your fake ID got you easily inside– Henderson’s wasn’t the type to have a scanner like some of the nicer clubs in downtown Atlanta. You recognize some kids from school before college, but try your best to advert your eyes if any of their gazes linger on your for more than a second. 

Dana led you straight to the bar where she ordered both of you vodka sodas. Dana had taught you all about the calories in things, and what drinks were best to keep you buzzed but thin. You had never really thought about that kinda stuff before, to be honest. You were always living on the edge of starving so the idea of watching your calories hadn’t occurred to you. But Dana was obsessed. She told you every number of calories in every serving of cafeteria food at school, read Weight Watchers and Cosmopolitan Magazines between classes, showing you new ideas for a diet she wanted to try the next day. You let her talk on and on about it, but anytime she asked you to try a new fad with her you usually turned her down, saying you were trying another diet, but you never told her which one. What you really wanted to say was she should relax and just…let herself enjoy food while it was so easily accessible. You definitely did, especially the first time you saw the cafeteria at GSU. The financial support you got from the state allowed you to get free food on campus, and you’d never been so excited to try so many things. The very first meal you had at the school had made you sick, you had eaten so much. You had to remember that this would be available all the time now, and you didn’t need to act like it was going to be taken away anytime soon. At least not ‘til summer, when you’d have to figure out what in the world you were going to do.

In the midst of your run on thoughts, Dana had pulled you into the dance floor, swaying her hips and holding your hand in one of her’s, the other holding the drink up to her mouth. She always looked so pretty, so put together. You wondered what you looked like standing next to her. She dressed you in a tight black tank top and a short denim skirt tonight. You didn’t let her put you in any of her shoes–you were adamant about keeping your comfortable footwear. And in your defense, the boots kind of looked good with the skirt, even if they were pretty beat up. Dana had smeared some eyeliner and mascara on you as well, and your eyes felt twice their usual weight. Throughout the night you weren’t sure if they felt heavy because of the makeup or the drinks in your system. The song suddenly changed as you danced with her, and it made you look up with a smile. You actually knew this one from the radio. 

As you looked up, however, you saw a familiar face across the room. Even through the crowd of dancing party goers–hell, no matter the size of the room or amount of people, you’d always be able to find that face.

Daryl. 

He already had his eyes on you, maybe that’s what made your eyes find him so easily. You could feel him watching. He was bringing his bottle of beer up to his lips when you noticed the blue and purple marks around his right eye. You groaned inwardly, wondering how he got that badly bruised. As he lowered the bottle from his mouth, you saw the healing split in his lip.

“Oh my god, that guy is cute,” Dana said next to you, having to raise her voice in your ear. She had followed your line of sight–you were probably staring–and your stomach sank when you saw her eyeing Daryl, “you know, like farmer boy hot, like he’s been in a fight. Even his black eye is hot.”

“He ain’t a farmer,” you mumbled, but she couldn’t hear you over the bass of the music. She was already making her way over to him, swerving through the people with ease. People always made way for her, maybe because of how pretty she was or just her presence alone. You were starting to wish people saw you the same way. Not until she’s made her way to stand in front of him did Daryl take his eyes off of you. He looked at her with a small smirk, letting her capture his attention. It was always easy for her to keep a guy’s attention, you’d noticed. She batted her eyelashes how girls are supposed to, put her hand on their arm and leaned into them. If only you knew how to do that stuff. Not that you really needed to. You still talked to Shane on the phone most nights, usually he asked how school was and after getting a few short answers about his day it would lead to phone sex, which you enjoyed but it still made you feel lonely when you hung up the phone. Once in a while he picked you up for a late night picnic in his truck or just to take you to a quiet place to have his way with you. You sighed and made your way over to the bar now, away from the sweaty dancers. Leaning against the sticky wooden surface, you stared at the stains on it while you waited for Dana to return. 

“Hey miss Piggy,” you heard a familiar voice in your ear. You turned to see Merle Dixon behind you, leaning in with that shit eating grin he always wore. His eyes seemed heavier than the last time you saw him, with bags under them from lack of sleep. He was also skinnier, which all things combined you had come to know meant he was on a bender–and not from alcohol.

“Miss Piggy is low, Merle,” you scoffed, facing him fully, leaning your elbows back on the bar, “even for you,”

“Aw, don’t be like that,” he lifted his mouth into a smirk, “you know you’ve always been a hottie in my eyes, Y/N. I just mean you’ve been rollin around with the pigs lately, huh?”

You rolled your eyes, “Nice, real nice.” you brought your drink up to your mouth, the bubbles hitting your tongue, burning in the best way. Shane’s face came into your mind’s eye, hating when they called him that. 

“Hey now, why didn’t you and I ever get together, Y/N?” he came in closer to you, “before you met Officer Friendly, how come we never bump’ uglies?”

You let out a laugh, and brought your hand up to his face, patting it gently, “cause you say things like ‘bump uglies’, Merle,” 

He still was smiling, turning to bite your hand. You gave his cheek one last hard pat, making him wince, “c’mon now, we’d have a lot of fuuun,” he teased.

You brought your hand away, rolling your eyes, “not gonna happen,” 

He’ laughed lightly, about to bring his bottle of Corona to his lips when he looks over your head, “well now lookie here, looks like my little brother does know how to score some puss,”

You nearly gagged at his choice of words, but still turned to see what he was on about. Your heart plummeted into your stomach at the sight of Dana and Daryl locked in a heavy makeout against the opposite wall. Daryl’s hand was on the back of her head, pulling her into him. She had her arms up around his neck, pushing herself against him in equal measure. You quickly looked away when you realized you’d been staring too long, and Merle was taking a drink from his beer, his eyes watching you. 

“What?” you snapped at him.

“Nothin,” he chuckled, shaking his head a little, “just looks like you’ll be goin’ home alone tonight,”

[chasingstardustandmoonbeams]

Love Won't Save Us

A/N: Sorry this took so long!

Warnings: Angst & I did not proof read

Word Count: 1.3k

Request: I saw you’re taking Cassian requests 👀 May I please get “ Don’t you see that there are people who care about you? That I care about?” + “I can’t lose you again! Please, don’t make me lose you again.” with lots of angst please and thank you!

Thump thump.

Thump thump. 

Thump thump.  

An endless rhythm of your heart as it pounded through your ears. You were cornered. You thought you had been playing this smart - thought out every possible scenario - everything that could go wrong. Still, you ended up here. 

Your leg was screaming at you. It had been grazed by a blaster shot. Gritting your teeth you tried your best to shift your weight on it. You didn’t have time to dress it - you didn’t have time to do anything but lean against the literal and metaphorical wall that you were pinned against.

Imperial troopers were beginning to close in on you. You took a steadying breath checking your blaster. Your thoughts veering towards Cassian. 

Cassian. 

You should have listened - been less stubborn. Instead you were here. 

You wanted to save him. That’s all you had wanted to do. Save him from what was about to happen to you. You blink roughly as tears start to form in your eyes. Your mind reeling to the last conversation you had with him. That is how he would remember you. Angry, bitter, careless. Maker, the look on his face. 

Your breath left your lungs as a blast threw you against a wall. You let out a shuddering gasp. 

There was only one last word you wanted to speak as blood came dripping out of your mouth. 

“Cass-” 

--------------------------------------------------------------

“When were you planning on telling me?” 

You didn’t need to look up to know Cassian was standing behind you, agitation dripping out of his voice. 

“I wasn’t”, you said simply as you finished putting on your boots. 

You could hear Cassian let out a huff as you turned around. His eyebrows were furrowed, arms crossed. He looked more annoyed and stressed than you had ever seen him. 

“You can’t do this,” he gritted out. “It’s a suicide mission. Let me-” 

“No.” The word left your mouth firmly. You stood your ground, your eyes not wavering from his. “I have to do this alone. It’s the only way.” 

“No- it’s not.” Cassian took a step towards you, but you took a step back. You may as well have slapped him from the expression on his face. 

“It is.” You swallowed down the lump in your throat. “Mon Mothma asked specifically because I am capable. I am expendable. And you, Cassian? You’re not. They need you.” 

“What? What are you talking about? You can’t believe that.” Cassian’s voice grew heated with every word. “Don’t you know? There are people here who care about you.” 

“They’ll get over it.” You shrugged off, trying to make your way to the door. Cassian blocked your path standing directly in front of you. 

“How can you say these things?” He was grabbing your shoulders now, his fingers digging into them so harshly you were sure you would bruise. You could only stare at him dumbly. “You matter,” he took a breath, “you matter to me.” 

You weren’t sure what to say. You could only stare at him, his brown eyes meeting yours in a desperate plea. 

“Please,” he whispered, “don’t do this alone. We can do this together.” His hands left your shoulders and now cradled your face softly. His thumbs running along your cheeks. “I need you. I -” 

You stilled his hands and removed them from your face. “You’ll be okay, Cassian. Whatever it is you think you feel for me will pass. It’s fleeting.” You passed him towards the door. 

“I love you.” 

You paused in front of the door. 

“I love you. That won’t pass.” 

You fought every urge to turn around. Tears had already begun to fall. You swallowed, “I don’t love you.”

“You don’t mean that.” 

“Love won’t save us”, you replied. You turned your head to the side, eyes downcast, “Goodbye, Cassian.” 

You walked through the door, feeling it close behind you. You wouldn't break - not now. You had to see this through. 

You briskly walked through the halls of the base, rounding the corner you ran into Mon Mothma. 

“Lieutenant,” her expression was soft, full of concern. “Are you sure you want to go this alone? I’m sure Andor would be more than willing to join you. I still think the two of you would be able to get the job done.” 

“No, thank you.” You smiled at her the best you could. 

She nodded back. “Good luck, Lieutenant.” 

You waited until you could hear her footsteps drift away, before you let out a shaky breath. 

“I was not aware Cassian was supposed to join you on the mission.” 

Your eyes widened. 

“K-2, you can’t tell him.” You said desperately. Your eyes turning towards the droid. 

“You have a higher success rate if Cassian joins you. You only have a likelihood of 15.25% of success without-” 

“No. No he can’t come and you can’t tell him.” The droid merely looked at you. “You want to keep him safe right? That’s all I want. You can’t tell him - he can never know. Promise me, K-2.”

“I-”

“Promise me.” 

“Very well. Cassian will not know.” 

“Thank you,” you let out a shaky breath. “Keep him safe for me, will you?” 

“You are awfully demanding today.” 

You tried your best to not roll your eyes at the droid. 

“But I will look after him.” 

“Goodbye, K-2.” You didn’t wait for a reply before walking off. You headed towards the direction of your ship. You only needed to get much imperial codes. Something you had done countless times before. This time felt different. You knew it. It was why you had to do this alone. 

It was selfish and stupid, but you couldn’t lose him. You loved Cassian. You would keep him safe, even if it killed you. 

--------------------------------------------------------------

Smoke filled your lungs as you struggled to drag yourself towards cover. Blood coated your mouth, but you wouldn’t give up. If this was really it, you wouldn’t go down without a fight. You blaster had been flung from your hands but you could see it just ahead. 

You let out a grunt as you narrowly escaped being hit with a blaster. Reaching out, your fingers grazed your blaster. Desperately, you reached for it as the sound of troopers grew nearer. 

Grabbing hold of your blaster, you flipped onto your back and fired away. You managed to hit two imperial troopers, still more troopers began to file in. 

Gritting your teeth, you prepared yourself. 

Through the smoke you could see the troopers turn around, distracted by something. Yelling and blaster fire surrounded the area until it became eerily quiet. 

Your arm was shaking from pain as you held your blaster up. You couldn’t see anything. 

A tall figure came closer to you, you gripped your blaster tightly. 

You let out a ragged breath, your eyes growing wide. 

“You promised-” you choked out. 

K-2SO stood clearly in front of you, Cassian running behind him to you. 

“You asked me to protect Cassian. By saving you, I save him.” 

You were left dumbstruck. Cassian slides down next to you, his eyes searching your body for your worst injuries. 

“Cassian,” you started, but the fierceness in his gaze stopped you.  

“You lied to me,” he bit out. 

“I did,” you hissed as his hands checked your leg wound. 

“We were supposed to come together.” 

“We were,” you breathed out. 

“You love me.” 

Your eyes met his, his brown eyes filled with worry. “I do. I love you, Cassian.” 

He pulled you close to him, holding you tightly as if you might disappear. “I can’t lose you,” his voice broke. 

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered, “I couldn’t bear the thought of losing you.” 

“We do this together,” he said firmly. “We get through this together.” 

 You could feel Cassian let out a small laugh. “I guess love did save you.” 

For now, you thought. You held onto Cassian and the thought of being together. That had to be enough for now.

[iheartjameshetfield]

Having kids with early/mid 80’s James 🤭

like yeah he’s young but there’s nothing that makes happier than his little family 💗

AHHH THIS IS SO SWEETTTTT

we all know damn well that the kid would be an accident 💀. he was fucking petrified when you told him the news since he was almost 1000% sure that he would fuck this kid up the same way his dad fucked him up.

you tried to reassure him multiple times throughout your pregnancy that he would be the best father there is, and you’d be there to help him, but he had no trust in himself whatsoever. the only thing that he knew for sure was. that no matter how hard it gets, he would never leave and put you and your kid through the same thing he went through.

even with all this, he was still the best person to have by your side during your pregnancy. he always tried to make sure that you’re comfortable, placing a pillow behind your back, head, and legs or he’d cover you with a blanket. he would get you whatever you’re craving, and if it wasn’t in the house, he would go and get it from the supermarket no matter the time.

he would constantly read books about parenting and pregnancy, making sure you get the best treatment. whenever you’d pat your belly, he’d get worried that you pat a little harder than you should, telling you to be more careful.

i feel like he would be the type of person to talk to your unborn child, like whenever he disagrees with you or just saying smth sweet to the baby like “we can’t wait to see you” or “see that? your mom wants to name you paul” he laughs as he makes fun of you with the baby.

when the child is born, hes definitely the type of dad to force everyone to wash the hands, wipes, and sanitize at least three times each before letting anyone touch the baby, including you.

for the first month or so after you give birth, he would always be the one to get up in the middle of the night for the baby, telling you to get your rest. after a while, he is literally prepared to play rock paper scissors with you at 3 in the morning to see who’ll get up.

you know that trick that almost every dad does when they toss their kid like 5 feet up in the air and catch them, giving all the moms a heart attack? yeah, he invented that trick. you’ve probably seen your baby in the air more than you’ve seen it in someone’s arms or the stroller or smth.

i truly believe that when the baby babbles, he babbles back. like the baby would say smth in gibberish and james would mimic the baby, conversing in their own language. or james would also respond with stuff like an exaggerated “no way!!” or “what else happened, tell me more”

he probably would’ve been rooting for a boy. he would be sooooooo excited if you had a boy, already planning on causing a lot of mischief with him.

he would teach his son how to play sports and guitar and all the stuff he’s interested in. james would race him and play wrestling games with him and pretend to lose.

even though he wanted a boy, when his little girl came, he would instantly change his mind, hoping that every future kid that comes would be a girl.

from day one and he would shower her with kisses and gifts, making sure she gets treated like the princess she is.

james definitely has tea parties with his little girl. he’d let her put hair clips in his hair, paint his nails a messy pink and accessories him in plastic beaded necklaces and bracelets. or whenever they’d play with dolls, he would speak in a high pitched voice like a girl’s voice after his daughter would force him to.

james would show up at every ballet practice and recital ever, refusing to not show up at a single thing. he would pick her up and drop her off at her practices, loving how his little girl comes running to him with open arms during every break she has. he’ll never miss the look his daughter had in her face when she spotted her parents in the crowd during her show, her eyes glinting as her smile brightened.

when she’s done with her dance, she’d leap into her father’s arms, you and james cradling her in a hug. “you were amazing princess. that was awesome!!” james would compliment her.

i feel like no matter what gender the baby is, they would want to be just like their dad in every way. the long hair, the band shirts, his guitar skills. whenever you see james around the house, you’d spot his little carbon copy waddling behind him in a custom ‘Metallica’ shirt and sunglasses that practically swallow your baby’s face.

when his kid is a little older, he’d want you to bring them to one of his shows, wanting his kid to see him on stage. he’d even show off his toddler to the crowd, showing off the newest member of the hetfield clan to the world.

this is me speaking off of real experiences btw

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Wednesday wonderful readers :) Holy hell can’t believe we're at the finale already. Granted only ten eps but still haha They really made these ten eps count. Can only wonder what a full season would’ve been like. But we can’t live in that realm. This finale minus the Monica crap didn’t care about was real good for our ship.

Also SO excited I got to mainly use pretty gifs from our wonderful gif makers in this one. They create them for us to use and I'm forever grateful. I love that I have the option to use my own if I need it. But much rather use these beautiful gifs if I can help it. First one in awhile been able to. Also proud of myself for getting this out right before my road trip. Moving to another state is a struggle. You hate all your belongings towards the end lol Also with Tumblr being a dick and erasing my edits twice.... But here it is despite all that . Let’s get started.

6x10 Escape Plan

For the sake of GIF space, and wanting to focus on the Chenford in this ep, I'm not going to do GIFs of her UC mission. I will do a quick rundown of what went down. Lucy’s priority is to get evidence linking Blair to Monica. They end up getting that link through Blair herself because of Nolan. Lucy finds out about the hit at the laundromat Monica is paying Batista for though. She is offing a former ally cause she's the absolute worst. Lucy is no longer needed as a Nanny after this with the family taking off.

They've decided to go to ground after this. Lucy is convinced it'll be easy to collar them though. Which leads us to this fantastic little moment. Lucy folds into the OP since she isn’t needed as a UC anymore. Tim does not take his eyes off her from the moment she enters the scene. It’s unreal. Be more in love with her Timothy I dare you. Look at that man above. This mini moment is so soft. The wording, the heart eyes, and how Angela is looking between them.

She knows they’re still in love with each other. Anyone with eyes can see that. It literally pours out of these two without them even noticing. Angela sure notices hehe She is the fandom in this moment watching this exchange. Melissa and Eric are damn treasure to make such a mini moment so soft and perfect. Got me squeeing to death over here. You can see he’s much happier with her apart of this OP. It’s so lovely. Brief but beautiful. Love our ship.

This scene is the second best of the episode. It’s the first time they’ve really had alone time together since the breakup. Now this isn’t the adult convo they need to have here. BUT this is a HUGE development in terms of communication. Especially from Tim. He’s the one to start and share. He’s grown so much I could cry. This conversation just shows how far he’s come and he is respecting Lucy’s boundaries in the process of this convo.

He’s opening up to her but also doing it on her terms. He doesn’t want to dump his feelings all over her. Because he lost that right when he broke them up. What he is doing is being vulnerable so Lucy knows what an impact she’s made on him. It’s a massive massive growth scene for Tim. It starts out with him sharing he took her advice about therapy. Lucy looks closed off as she should be at first. Saying and?

Tim makes a crack about her being a blackmailing psychopath. Because the jokes help him be vulnerable with her. We all know how much he hates to be that even with Lucy. So this is such good progress for him. Lucy lets him know that’s not normal what happened to him lol I've had two and that most definitely has not happened to me haha You can tell she’s excited he’s gone and doesn’t want him to sour on it cause of Blair. This convo alone proves how much it’s done for him so she wants him to know that. Always watching out for him, no matter what I love it. *happy sigh*

It's fascinating to watch Lucy soften the more he speaks about it. She remains cautious, and rightfully so. But she is intently listening and absorbing everything he’s saying. Tim letting her know the irony was she was a good therapist. And she was there was no doubt about that. She got him to go and I’ll be forever grateful to her for that. After being in therapy and having it continually make my life better I so relate with his replies.

How she opened doors to things he didn’t even know was there. You can see he is pensive but lighter as he says this. When you unearth stuff and give it room to breathe. Process what it is. You feel so much better. For me always starts out with this uneasy pressure and fire in my belly. The anxiety and uncomfortableness of it.

Then by the time we’re done dissecting it that feeling is gone and I feel noticeably lighter. Guarantee you was the same for him. You can tell by how he talks about it. Look at how Lucy is looking at him as he speaks. She can sense it too. Gah it’s so good. She is so impressed and proud of him. Look at her face in the first two gifs. It says it all to me. Melissa, like Eric, has a remarkable ability to convey so much emotion through her eyes. Why we have a super couple everyone. Our actors who portray them are superb.

Tim goes on to say now those confessions are being dissected. Up in the cloud for some FBI IT guy to come un-encrypt them. I hate that so much for him. No doubt the confessions he had were very raw and vulnerable. To have them exposed has to be so violating. I know I would be feeling incredibly violated if mine were leaked. It’s supposed to be a safe space to work your crap out. Be emotional, vulnerable, and talk your feelings out. Which is so hard for our boy.

Wish we could've seen his sessions. But they didn't have time with ten eps. Maybe S7? Tim continuing on to say how they’re going to be analyzed for evidentiary value. I hate that so much. Tim is putting a light spin on it. But we know deep down how much that bothers him. If they were in a better spot or even together he would voice that. But they’re not there yet. Lucy looks at him with a soft smile though. One betraying her feelings for this man. Telling him she’s sorry. Because she really is. Last thing she'd ever want for him.

Lucy then asks if he said anything revealing about her? Because of course he did. There’s no way in hell that man didn’t talk about her. She was one of the main reasons he sought out therapy. But there’s nothing to be done about what he revealed at this point. What’s done is done as they say. His joke had me cracking up so very much. I know it was misinterpreted by some. Wondering if he was deflecting.

He was not. He clearly said intimate and personal things in his sessions. Like I said earlier supposed to be a safe space to do so. But given where they are right now. The fact that this is their first real convo in almost four episodes he keeps it light. Maybe someday when they’re back together they can dip their toe back in but that time is not now. As I said in the very beginning of this scene. He is respecting her boundaries in this moment.

Doing this for couple reasons. One making light of it because he’s feeling vulnerable in this moment. Two he wants to lighten the mood because this is a serious subject. I wanna cry at how much he’s grown to even be vulnerable enough to share this with her. Her reply reminded me of 5x21 when she asked Tim if he missed her? It’s so cute and such a light hearted way to end this scene. This scene represents significant growth for him and for their relationship. They’re on the road to slowly healing and I’m here for it.

The hit was pops off. Tim sees one of the guys taking a truck to escape. He pursues him alone and jumps in back. Luckily his wife sees this and takes off after her man. Doesn’t waste anytime going after him. I love it sfm. When the chips are down they are just there for each other. I’ll forever love how fiercely protective they are of one another. Makes my heart swell with shippy happiness. Angela joins Lucy in the pursuit of Tim.

We watch as Lucy is having a panic attack watching Tim struggle. He is losing the battle quickly and she cannot just sit there and let him get hurt or worse. The love of her life is being demolished in this fight. She physically can’t stand it and tells Angela to take the wheel. Angela is floored by her determination to get to him. If you weren’t already impressed with the BAMF Lucy Chen has become. You will be now. Look at how she jumps onto that truck.

The music once again perfection as the scene unfolds. She is fueled by the need to protect her person and some adrenaline to go along with it. I love Tim’s face when she appears. So thankful she is there because he was NOT I repeat not winning. He was upside down so quickly. It’s why Lucy is there saving him. They immediately fall back into the well oiled machine they are in the field. Taking down this guy together. Always say they look like poetry in motion at work this scene is continual proof of that.

I love the looks they share in the cab. Tim’s far more telling than hers. Looks like he’s falling in love with her all over again For the second episode in a row. Floored by the cop she’s become. How amazing she was to make that jump and save his ass. He is forever in awe of this woman in front of him. Saying so much with just a look there Timothy. You are at work put those heart eyes away haha Actually don’t I love it so much. You can see the utter reverence in his eyes for her. Does my shippy soul good to see it.

The look Tim gives her outside the truck is EVERYTHING. She just risked her life to save him. That man is in shock. After everything he did. The fact that she would risk her life for him like that.... He can't believe it. That’s the face of a man astonished by the woman standing before him. She did it because she still loves you my silly goober of a man. But we will get there I’m sure of it. Like I said earlier this is a slow healing and I’m ready for the ride. I really am.

So much is being said with these looks and no words are even spoken. That’s the beauty of our ship right here. That silent communication only they have. How they can convey so much with just a look. God I love this ship. There’s a reason they’ve had a stranglehold on me for years. Tim cannot take his eyes off the woman in front of him. I love it so much.

T.O. Tim would’ve lost his mind at her action. In love Tim can’t stop being in awe of her for it. I can’t get over how he is looking at her. It’s so telling. Lucy is reciprocating will a look of her own. Their instinct to reach out to each other but they hold back. *sigh*. Such a an incredible fight scene. Our ship got back to back finales with bad ass fight scenes. I love watching them in the field. That’s where their roots begin. Why I love it so much.

We start off the glorious elevator scene. (And fantastic song in the background. Can't praise the music department enough.)We get back to back goodies in this space too. The scene we’re about to embark on is beautifully done. Eric and Melissa doing what they do best. Knocking it out of the park with their skills and chemistry. I love Tim’s 'Lucy smile' being in full force as she walks up to him. *happy sigh* That man could not be more in love with her if he tried. Lucy isn’t holding back with the heart eyes when he’s not looking either. Her being the one to crack the joke is precious. Lightening the vibe instantly.

Making a crack about his injury. Her way of showing she cares without it getting too personal. Because they just aren’t there yet and ya know that’s ok. This is going to be a slow burn to reconciliation. I’m actually pretty excited about it. Tim returns her affections with a joke of his own. Saying slacker is his middle name haha Ever the gentlemen let’s Lucy go on first. They settle into the elevator with some charged energy. Lucy retreats into the back of it. Not ready to be standing that close to him yet.

Wanting to keep whatever this interaction may be brief. She’s still hurting and it shows. Also, knowing the magnetic pull of theirs too strong for her to tempt fate by being closer to him. Tim feels this too as he settles in. Doesn’t push it. His spatial awareness around her remains considerate. Stays out of her bubble for the most part. The growth train with Tim continues. I’m floored by this scene everyone. Just floored. Also proud and astonished by this man. Opening up to not once but TWICE in the same episode.

Let us delve into this wonderful scene with how Tim opens it up. His back to her still. Respecting this physical boundary she has set up. I wanna start by saying watch Lucy in the background as he speaks. He only slightly turns his body so he can’t fully see it. The look of apprehension present? Yes. She is like a wounded animal, not sure if she can trust the man in front of her fully. But she cannot for the life of her keep the love and reverence out of her eyes. She does it the entire scene.

Just because she can’t trust him yet doesn’t mean she isn’t still madly in love this man. Her actions in the OP proving as much. Tim leads off with her saving his life. Blatantly stating she saved his life. Who are you and what have you done with Tim Bradford? Lucy deflects because she doesn’t know how to handle this new Tim. One who is graciously giving her credit. Lucy is feeling vulnerable herself and pushing it away. Telling Tim he had him. Honey, you don’t jump onto a moving truck out another vehicle in motion if he had him lol

Tim refuses to take ANY credit for this. Telling her basically how fucked he was in that moment. Reminding her of his predicament. Letting her know how much he DID NOT have him. He knows he screwed up in his approach and she saved him from his mistake. The growth here makes me wanna cry. They are happy tears don’t worry. The more I go through this season the more I’m glad we had this all happen. I know you must think I’m crazy for saying that. But it’s true.

Can you imagine S1 Tim acknowledging his mistake and showing gratitude to Lucy for saving him? Hell, even S5 Tim, who is madly in love with her, couldn’t share the credit in 5x05 for her saving his life in the pilot. This is a much different Tim Bradford we are looking at folks. Despite all the crap with Dr. London he has grown. Their fallout brought him to a place where he could. To the point where he is thanking her for saving him. No bravado. No tough Tim. Just vulnerability plain and simple. Not only that but sincere gratitude.

Lucy can see the vulnerability he is displaying to her. She can feel how sincere his words are because she knows this man. Back in 6x09 she asked John how he sounded. Because she can determine everything about where is by the tone of his voice. Lucy can’t even see his face really but can tell how sincere he is being by his voice.

That’s why we get this incredibly soft look from her. Heart eyes galore as she tells him ‘You’re welcome.’ As I stated earlier she may not trust him right now. But god is she is so in love with this man. It’s written all over how she is staring at him as she replies above.

Getting me all in my shippy feels and igniting my excitement. I have no doubt Tim feels she doesn’t love him anymore. If he turned around and saw her revealing look of love he would know. But he doesn’t. Being respectful of her space in this moment he keeps his back turned.

It’s here we see Tim internalizing everything. Gathering up the courage to turn around and tell her what’s been on his heart. Something I’m sure has been rattling around in his head since he started therapy. Their hug in this very elevator likely intensified these feelings even more. The kindness and empathy she showed him. Even though he felt unworthy of it. It stirred something up in him. Realizing again what he once had that he so hastily threw away. Once again Eric be killing me with his expressiveness. Tim finds the courage to turn around and speak his peace.

We watch him be vulnerable and open up to her for the third time in this ep. Second time just in this moment. Once I was shocked and proud enough. But three all together? I’m damn right giddy at this point. He starts off STRONG. Admitting he knows he ruined everything. This is HUGE. Finally admitting fault to her. The fact that he knows this and is acknowledging it. *screams into a pillow* It's everything we've waited for. It’s an incredible start to this part. So many were mad at him in 6x07. It wasn’t fair or just to Tim. He needed time to get here. Lucy may need her own therapy and growth. But is little more evolved in the emotional game than Tim.

Also it's WHY he needed therapy in the first place. Wasn’t fair to expect that out the gate for him pre-therapy. You don’t get his character if that’s what you expected IMO. Sorry if that’s harsh but it’s true. It’s what makes this scene even more satisfying. To watch him make the journey to this moment with her. To let her know he screwed up royally. That he wouldn’t have blamed her for turning on him. He made it easy to. This second line showing he still has growth to do. To get to the place where he knows Lucy love him through anything. But he’s a WIP as we all are lol

Lucy isn’t sure she is ready for this conversation. We can see that she struggles to even make eye contact with him. Like I said earlier, she’s having a hard time trusting him, let alone accepting this newer side of Tim. It’s a lot for her to take in post OP. She’s also still harboring a lot of anger towards him. You can see it percolating all over her expression. Tears forming in her eyes. Threatening to fall at any second. Melissa out here trying kill me with her amazing acting.

That anger is ever present and hasn't really had a chance to breathe or surface at all. I mentioned in 6x09 that she hadn't really dealt with the trauma of their breakup fully. Her reaction above is proof of that. This is why she’s letting him know he doesn’t have to do this. Because, deep down, this is what she’s wanted, but she isn’t sure she is actually ready for it. She hasn't sorted through her own feelings and anger fully about all this. Fingers crossed s7 does that or she is there by then. Also Lucy is trying to give Tim an out he is REFUSING to take with her reply.

Tim isn’t going to let this moment pass by without saying this. He is trying to repair them with something he should’ve done long ago. Communication. Honest communication with her. It’s on his heart to do this and nothing is stopping him. It’s here he says a line that makes us all swoon. Makes us all wanna kiss him for. Also, it's making me incredibly emotional in the process. He’s just so god damn sincere it’s making my heart ache in the best way. Letting her know she will never know how much he appreciates her kindness.

Because to Tim he felt so unworthy of it. He felt that way before they broke up. Her continuing to be the same caring empathetic person to him afterwards? Blowing his mind. Also reminding him of this incredible person he let slip through his fingers. It’s an epiphany he’s having here in this moment. What he’s really thanking her for is far more than just the truck and their elevator hug.

She’s shown him her kindness and big heart since the start of their relationship. When he was a dumpster fire and all she could see was his good heart. The man that was beneath all the damage. Lucy has been a constant source of joy, positivity and love in his life. He would be remiss not to thank her for all that she has done for him. This is extending for their whole relationship IMO. His words holding extra meaning in that regard. Thanking her for their entire relationship.

This next part is friggin EVERYTHING. This is Tim acknowledging he took her choice and voice away in 6x06. He is giving her all the say in this moment. Letting her know he will spend the rest of his life trying to pay her back. Which makes my heart happy on so many levels. Wanting to EARN his spot back at her side. Not just waltzing back in. He wants to demonstrate his commitment and win back his place in her life. Gah it’s so good.

I can't wait to see what does for his small doses in s7. Also, there’s something so beautiful about Lucy just being Lucy that reminds him why he fell in love with her in the first place. About what he has lost as well. Knowing this incredible person needs to be earned back. He then follows it up with whatever small doses she allows. Which is now on HER terms. He’s giving Lucy her voice and choice back.

Things he robbed her of in their breakup. Took away her agency when he did these things. Beautiful thing is he recognizes this and is letting her know. Not only does he have a lot to make up for, but if she allows him to, it’ll be fully on her terms and say. You’re dead inside if you weren’t tearing up in this moment. I was a mess. Also If you can’t see the enormous amount of growth this moment represents I can’t help you lol

Lucy’s guarded but softened look says everything. How she is longing to let him back in but can’t just yet. Almost like how a rescue animal would react. The need to want to trust is there. But it hasn’t been rebuilt yet. She is hesitant to truly trust in it. Lucy is floored by the man standing in front of her though. The myriad of emotions coursing through her is reflected above. Just look at her eyes alone. It’s here we can see her soften a little. Defrost a bit. She’s not there yet but she will be. We all love Lucy for her loving and forgiving heart. I don’t see why she wouldn’t let him back in if he continues this growth. This desire to make things right between them.

Working on himself to be better. Regaining his place in her life. Something he wants so badly but realizes he needs to earn back. There is a great quote from Ted Lasso that fits perfectly here. "I hope that either all of us or none of us are judged by the actions of our weakest moments. But rather by the strength we show when and if we're ever given a second chance." I remember there being a small faction of people being nasty about Tim still. How they never wanted Lucy to forgive him. It was those same people who were terrible about his mental health crisis too. Showing their emotional immaturity once again. Made my blood boil.

I avoided the Chenford tag because couldn't take the outrageous takes they were spewing. Here is what I have to say to those people. One. I hope you never make a mistake in your life then. Because the way you want this man to be treated is with zero empathy or compassion. I highly doubt you'd want that for yourself. Second refer to the quote above. No one should be defined by the actions of their weakest moments. That's not who Lucy Chen is. There is no way she would hold this against someone she loves forever. Tim is going to earn her back I guarantee you that. He is going to show strength when given that second chance. Mark my words.

Tim gives her the sweetest Lucy smile before he turns back around. Feeling better having shared a piece of himself with her. Proud of himself for being vulnerable with her even though scared him to death. Written all over his face in the second gif. But he couldn't let her leave that elevator without letting her know he was going to put the work in. Going to try and fix what he so hastily broke.

It’s once again how Lucy is looking at him when he turns back around that gets me. That longing to reach out to him but keeping herself from doing as such. Keeping herself rooted to that wall in an effort to stop herself from reaching out like she longs to. If you were wondering if she was still in love with him look at her. That is the face of a woman who is still so in love with the man before her.

Tim tops it off with bidding her good night. Nothing more nothing less. He said what he needed to say. It’s up to Lucy to accept it or ignore it completely. It’s her prerogative either way. Which is the impression he wanted to leave her with. Lucy keeping that longing but questioning look up as she follows him out below. We can see her starting to see the change in him as she does. First he tells her he's gone to therapy and now this. I saw a something the other day it said 'An apology isn't one if there isn't changed behavior.' Tim is exhibiting changed behavior here.

Lucy is feeling torn between staying mad or starting to heal. Wanting desperately to believe in his words. That is written all over her face as she exits the elevator. We see her face change into a small smile at the end. It's not in this gif but she does. This was the start to healing everyone. Also was the perfect way to end the season for them IMO. Why you ask? Because it didn’t need to more than this. Anything more would be been a disservice to this SL they created. Would’ve made breaking them up pointless. It had to have a purpose and this was it. Growth. Also this scene is a promise for s7.

I know some wanted a frantic hook up but it wasn't right to do so. They are not ready to be back together yet. Both have a lot of work to do before we get there. How they ended them for the season was *chefs kiss* It ended with Tim acknowledging the wrong he had done and what he’s going to do to make it up. That’s what makes s7 so exciting. I think he will continue therapy. I really do. I also think we’re about to see a determined Tim driven in his quest to make amends. Get to see a side of him we haven’t seen before and that excites me to no end.

Because Lucy Chen brings out the best in this man. And s7 is going to reflect that. As much as this season ripped my heart out. Truly I haven’t been this devastated by a couple in half a decade at least. If not a little more tbh. But rewatching this and having a better insight to it. I’m glad they did this. We all love Lucy rebuilding him and loving him into a better version of himself. Don’t get me wrong I love that. She changed his life dramatically for the better. Thing is she was his safety blanket emotionally.

I said this back in 6x07 that it was Tim’s journey to go on not Lucy’s. It was his problem to fix. She couldn’t fix what was wrong inside him. Only therapy and putting in the work was going to get that done. Their breakup was an eventuality without Tim growing. When they get back together (which they will) we will be grateful for the painful growth this season gave them. Said this before. Rather have them evolve snd grow as characters than be puddle deep like Bailian.

We’re going to get a stronger and even better version of Chenford in s7. Better version of them as characters as well. I cannot wait for the slow burn of their reconciliation. Going to make all the hurt worth it. Because it wouldn’t be right or realistic to rush them back together. I’m ready for the slow burn of s7. I really am. It's going to make when they get back together all the more sweet. I’ll be excited when we lose our minds collectively when it does. Also enjoying the journey it’ll take to get us there. I might do minis for s7 too. I’ll post something when we get closer to that if that’s someone people want.

Until then remember our ship is the best ship on this show. They’ll find their way back to each other. When they do it’s going to make it all worth it ❤️ Also the link above is for the song in the elevator. Whoever is in charge if music is truly gifted at what they do. Every song was lyrically perfect or just musically apt for the moment it was in. Thank you to everyone once again for the likes, comments (please leave comments haha I love them sfm) Reblogs they make all The effort so worth it. Shall see you all in s7 :)

~~~~

Side notes-Non Chenford

More creepy waking up with Bailian. I don’t get get them as a couple. I really don’t. Like watching paint dry.

Loved Aaron's mic drop of a moment with Dr. London. Well done sir. Shall miss you. Come and visit eh? Maybe for a wedding...

[chaifootsteps]

Listen. I know zippy dip about transformers and about Arcee.

It is bizarre AS HELL that internet people keep calling you transphobic because you identify with a fictional character in a different way than other trans people do.

Especially like. When there’s apparently a whole ass canon conversation about Arcee not liking the she/her pronouns??? But w/e either way it doesn’t really matter just pointing out how weird it is b/c I’m ASSUMING it’s not like Arcee was introduced as a transwoman character and you just went “nah”

But even if you did. It’s a fictional character. It’s a giant robot person. Who changes into a car (or truck or smthing again i known zilch about transformers)

Like. I am BEGGING some of ya’ll Chai stalkers to PLEASE just speak to LGBTQ people outside of the internet cartoon discourse world. Literally no one would give a fuck.

Because a trans person having a different opinion on a fictional trans character than you is just. It’s absolutely not transphobia.

(Side sarcastic joke—“I can’t believe chai said Arcee uses he/they and now as a consequence trans people can’t get access to the healthcare they need!!! If ONLY chai used she/her for Arcee, but now we’re all DOOMED!!!”

Oh no, Arcee came onto the scene literally snarling the word "she" through his teeth, pushing back when people called him that. We see a little of his forced transition and he's strapped down, frightened, and in pain.

Arcee's sex reassignment had as much in common with a trans person's experience as an annual cleaning has in common with the scene from Marathon Man. It wasn't a choice, it was an act of horrific sexual violence that they spent the next eight years emphasizing as something that ruined his life, only to suddenly retcon it all in the very last issue of the series.

But even aside from all that, you hit the nail on the head. Arcee, as much as he means to me, is a fictional character, and I'm a real live human being (who happens to be trans.) And protip, if you're placing the feelings and well-being of a fictional character over the well-being of a living, breathing trans person? You're probably not as "trans rights are human rights" as you think.

[anonymous-rendezvous]

Redamancy

💛 Luca Kaneshiro x GN!Reader

✦ — Written by Mod I ✨. Beta Read and Edited by Mod S 👿.

✧ — Contains: Established Relationship, fluff, spicy 🔞

✦ — Word count: 5.8k+ | Ao3

redamancy | pronunciation - ‘red-a-“man-sE(n.) the act of loving someone who loves you back; a love returned in full. — After a night out with friends, Luca can’t stop thinking about his relationship with you. You are his world and he wouldn’t trade it for anything. But he can’t help but wonder, would you want to take your relationship a step further?

First | | next >>

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

“Wait–wait,” Mysta’s eyes blink repeatedly, eyes hazy with alcohol. “Wait. You’re telling me the two of you have been together almost a year and haven’t had sex yet?” From across the table, the mafia boss's hands twitch, eyes locked anywhere but on his friends. 

“Mysta.” Ike immediately chastises the detective, shooting him a disapproving look.

Said brunette nearly yells back, “What!? I’m just surprised! Yeah, they’ve been in a relationship for a year, but he’s had feelings for them long before that. Hell, he’s known them longer than most of us have!” Blue eyes lock back onto the large blonde. “To be clear, I’m not like judging or anything. Just curious. Have you ever asked or talked about it?”

The novelist shakes his head, sighing at the direction this conversation has taken. “There’s always the chance they’re on the ace spectrum, Mysta. You can’t just assume these things.” He raises his drink to his lips. “Or it could just be something neither of them is interested in. Not everyone is interested in sex.”

When Luca finally raises his eyes from the table, ears all red, he finds Shu silently watching him. “We can change the subject if you don’t want to talk about it.” He sends the sorcerer an awkward smile, raising both hands as he starts to speak.

“No, no! It’s, uh it’s fine! We’ve just…” His eyes dart back down to the table again, his face no doubt red as his flush refuses to go away. “We’ve never really talked about it. And I didn’t–.....” Luca paused as he reflected on of his next words. “I didn’t want to seem disrespectful, ya’know? So I figured if they ever wanted to discuss it, we would.”

The Brit across the table scoffed, waving his hand dismissively. “Oh please, you’re incapable of being disrespectful Luca.” He raises a hand to point a gloved finger at the blonde, lips curling into a teasing smirk. “Himbo.”

“What!... I’m not a himbo!” Luca immediately denies. “I’m mean and evil! A big scary mafia boss! I'm not a himbo...” He pouts, eyes looking off to the side as his last statement trails off. 

“I mean… you do check off all the credentials though…” Shu smirked into his glass, trying his best not to choke on a laugh as the blonde’s head turned quickly in his direction, shooting him a betrayed look. “Just saying!” Ike shakes his head with a laugh. Taking pity on his friend, decides to move the topic to the new series he was reading, making the aforementioned mafia boss extremely grateful as the topic finally shifts away from his sex life. Or rather lack, therefore of. Relaxing back into the faux leather of the booth seat, he cradles his drink between his hands, crossing one leg over the other as his eyes trail around the bar.

They had rented the place out for the evening so that they could relax and share a few drinks without having to worry about being recognized. No matter how casually they dressed, it was hard to miss the mystical creatures that the majority of girls were; being so easily recognizable and all. Currently, those same girls were scattered in groups around the bar. Some were tucked away in booths, while the majority were enjoying themselves on the dance floor. Luca can’t help but giggle as he watches Uki quite literally drag Fulgur and Sonny to join the girls dancing; both looking extremely awkward as they’re pulled along. Lilac eyes continue their trek across the room before finally, they come to a stop on you.

He watched as you stood with Vox in front of the sound system, arguing over music choices. “No. Nonono, Vox, you don’t understand–”

“I don’t understand!? You can't simply play ‘Party Rock Anthem’ this late into the night! We either all have to be completely sober or shit-faced to enjoy that song in its entirety!” The voice demon argues.

“And yet you wanna play a song by ‘Queen’? The perfect karaoke band? How is that any different!?”

Before Vox could speak another word, Nina appeared beside the duo. “Alright babies, since I've already collected the next round by myself and you still haven’t decided on a song, it’s mommy’s choice.”

Luca can’t help but laugh as the two of you comedically groan in unison, “But Moooom!”

“Sorry honeys~”

The pair retrieve the trays from the ex-goddess before shuffling their way back to the tables. Once you set your tray down, your hand affectionately reaches up to squeeze your boyfriend's arm. "Doing okay, love?" You wondered aloud, thumb running soothing circles over the fabric of his dress shirt. It's such a simple action, yet every time you do it his heart still skips a beat. He reaches up, clasping his hand over yours before taking your hand and intertwining your fingers together. He gives a soft 'mh-hmm' drawing your hand closer before pressing a light kiss to your knuckles.

His eyes flicker up to you, "How 'bout you? You okay? Hmm?" Your expression softens further, nodding your head with a smile. A disgruntled groan draws both of your attention back to the rest of the group.

"Wow, thanks for reminding the rest of us how painfully single we are." Mysta pouts as he slumps over the table, the only one that actually looks bothered by that fact. The sound of your laughter fills the air, causing an immediate grin to tug at the blonde's lips.

"Awww don't worry Mysta! You'll find the perfect person, eventually; you're an absolute catch after all, despite what you think." You finish with a wink in his direction, which causes the detective to jokingly sob before facing Luca.

"Dammit, man! Why’d you have to steal them away first? Unfair."

Luca can't help but smirk as he leans further back into the booth. "Of course, I had to steal them away. I'm the mean and evil Mafia boss, remember? But…" Lavender eyes trailed up to lock on yours, a flush creeping over his cheeks as he pulled your still-clasped hand back to his lips. “...they stole my heart first. So it's only fair that I pay them back by stealing theirs." Mysta groans again causing Shu and Ike to laugh, the sorcerer patting the detective's back while Nina and Vox coo at the two of you.

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

A couple of hours later, the pair of you stumble through the door of your shared home, hand distractedly waving the Lucub that was your Uber, goodbye. Your hand skims the wall in search of the switch as you try to catch your breath, laughter continuing to shake through you; struggling but being able to close the door with your other hand. Your boyfriend was in no better state.

"Can–can you believe it? I didn't think he would actually climb up and dance on the table!" Luca laughed, clutching at his sides.

"You literally told him he didn't have the balls to do it! You have got to stop being such an enabler!" Wheezing, you place a hand on your chest and try to slow your breathing. The blonde only laughed harder. "We're so lucky we'd rented the place out, we absolutely would have gotten kicked out!" After briefly catching your breath, you use your feet to fumble with your shoes but let out a startled sound when you're suddenly swept up in muscular arms. "Ah–Luca!"

Said man continued to laugh as he pulled you into the living room and out of the entryway, beginning to dance you around the furniture; humming a tune of his own. You struggled to keep up with his sudden movements, but not once did you attempt to stop the impromptu dance. His exaggerated movements eventually slowed before he pulls you closer to him, watching as the smile never left your face. He wraps an arm around your waist to draw you flush to his chest, the other clasping one of your hands in his. Your free hand slides up along his shoulder before resting at the nape of his neck. His face and ears are warm as he feels your fingers play with his hair softly. 

Luca continues to dance you around the room slowly before lowering you in a dip. The way you ease your body into it, trusting him fully not to drop you, sends butterflies fluttering in his stomach. For a moment he feels like he’s in a dream – the way moonlight peaks through the window, bathing your skin in a soft glow. Or maybe, he half thinks, it’s just the residuals of all the drinks he’s had. Yet he just can’t help the way he stares down at you, holding you suspended in that pose; this kind of feeling can’t only be explained away with alcohol. Only he gets to see you like this – completely comfortable in his arms. You are his, and his alone, and he couldn’t be happier with that thought. 

Your eyes flutter open, meeting his awed gaze. The enormous smile that’s been on you since he began this impromptu waltz grows gentle as you take in his expression hovering over you. That fluttering feeling intensifies as he watches the sheer open affection dance in your eyes, and he’s speaking before his brain can even properly process – his tone full of nothing but admiration, “You look amazing.”

Laughing with a hint of shyness, you parrot back at him, “You look amazing.” Your expression grows cheeky as you grip him tighter.

He lets out a little flustered laugh as he shakes his head. “No, really. You look amazing.”

His tone is so serious it catches you off guard, eyes widening for a split second before you pat his chest, letting out a small chuckle. “Okay, we’re both still tipsy.” You pull yourself up while gripping his shoulder; trying to stand up as you regain your footing. Luca quickly realizes and helps with a supporting hand on your back. Though once you’re standing properly, he gets a better look at your face – a chance to see how flustered you are by his words before you duck away, head downcast to hide your sudden rush of shyness.

“Maybe, but–” he slides his hand down your back, pulling you closer by your waist to be against him– “you really are so pretty.” His free hand reaches up to grasp your chin, leaving you no choice but to meet his eyes. There’s definitely alcohol still coursing through his system. He was rarely this bold without some of it in him. As his thumb brushes against your lower lip, his voice gets softer and deeper the longer he continues to speak. “So damn gorgeous...” He leans into you, your noses brushing as his lips ghost over yours; eyes remaining locked. “And you're mine.” His words have weight to them, and it doesn't take long for him to depict it, lips feverishly pressing against yours.

You’re barely able to let out even a sound as his lips mold to yours. Every time your lips part to catch your breath, the more his lips seem to seek yours out. Luca’s chasing yours with something toeing the line of desperation and need. Strong hands clutching at you in such a way that you knew could leave bruises if he so wished, yet his strength was something he was acutely aware of – even with his alcohol-addled mind.

His tongue brushes against your lips and there's not a second wasted before you open your mouth to him, allowing your tongues to brush against each other. You can still taste the drinks on his breath as your hands trail to tangle themselves in golden strands. Pulling out the golden clip, you can't help the content sigh, leaving you at the feeling of his soft hair falling against your fingers. Luca’s own hands began shifting, his hands sliding over your form; slipping their way under your shirt to grasp at your bare skin. The cold leather of his gloves causing you to shiver, his hold on you growing tighter. Yet you suddenly realize where the two of you have been heading, when the hand you have in his hair tugs, and a moan slips from his lips.

You attempt to pull away. However, Luca chases after your lips. “Wai–” You can’t help the noise that leaves you as Luca’s hands grope at your hips, attempting to pull you further against him. Your hands fall from his hair down to his shoulders and attempt to nudge him back. And although he makes another attempt to recapture your lips, he allows you the distance. Breathless from his kisses, you finally say, “Luca wait…” You have a feeling he’s not even aware of the whine he lets out as he finally allows you to take a full step back, his grip loosening but never fully retracting from you. “We’re still tipsy we shouldn’t–I don’t want–” You let out a frustrated breath, head foggy from both the alcohol still in your system and the intense make out you just had. “I don’t want to be tipsy the first time we’re together like that.”

Lavender eyes go from half-lidded to wide-eyed, blinking owlishly at you as the words sink in. You watch as his face shifts from surprise to an emotion you can’t quite depict, before finally settling on serious. With the firm nod he gives, you’d almost believe he was sober if you hadn't seen him down a few glasses at the bar with your own eyes; not including what you could taste on his lips. He tugs at the hem of your shirt lightly, silently asking if you’d move closer. Taking a step forward into his space, he leans in to press another kiss to your lips – much softer than the ones you shared seconds prior. This time, he doesn’t chase after you when you pull away, his eyes looking at you apologetically. 

His flush deepens as you chuckle, lips brushing against his cheek before stepping back once more, lightly patting his chest. “Okay, we should drink some water, maybe get some food in us too.” One of your hands raises to tug the collar of your shirt away from your body; almost having to peel it off your skin with how warm your body has gotten. “Definitely take a shower. I’m so sweaty after all the dancing tonight.” You say with a light laugh.

Luca smiles lazily as he watches you make your way to the kitchen. His head still feels like it’s buzzing; mind racing as he thinks about how your body felt in his hands. As he idles there, still in the middle of the room, his thoughts drift back to his earlier conversation with the boys. He can’t help the way he shifts in place, feeling a mixture of nervous excitement. The conversation wouldn’t be as hard or awkward to broach as he initially thought it could be; the previous minutes playing through his head. Luca’s eyes follow you as you amble back into the room and pass him a water bottle. A quick ‘Thank you.’ escapes his lips before he uncaps it, downing about half of it immediately. There are simultaneous ‘Ah's’ as you both finish drinking, causing the two of you to laugh.

Meeting his eyes, you tilt your head toward the staircase, eyes going between it and him. “Do you want to use the shower first? As sweaty as I feel, I don’t mind waiting.”

The mafia boss tipped his head in contemplation. His eyes mimicked yours by looking back towards the stairs before meeting yours again, mouth opening before closing in hesitation. He takes another gulp of his water before nervously stuttering out, “We–we could both take one, ya’know. Together. Bathe together, I mean.” You're not even given a second to respond before he seems to start backpedaling, shaking his head aggressively. “We don’t have to! I don’t want to make you uncomfortable! You can just take one fir–” His jaw shuts with an almost audible click as your hand rests lightly on his forearm.

“I wouldn’t mind, Luca.” You soothe, looking at him with adoring fondness. “Are you sure you’d be okay with that? I know we typically change in the same room together but…” Your sentence trails off, but he understands what you mean, anyway. He shifts his arm, positioning it so he can clasp your hand.

“I am,” He says with a firm nod, “I want to. I–you know–” He swallows as his voice starts to shake from embarrassment, pausing to collect his words. “I like taking care of you; want to care for you in that way, too.”

Now you can feel yourself growing flustered as well. Taking a deep breath, you nod your head. “Okay.” The smile you receive could rival the sun’s warmth. He pulls your hand that’s still clasped in his up to his mouth, pressing a kiss to your knuckles before the pair of you part ways. Luca heads up to prepare the bath, while you grab extra water bottles, making the mental note to grab clean clothes to sleep in.

You can hear the water running as you walk up to your shared bedroom, the door to your bathroom wide open. Setting the bottles on the dresser, you start digging out some comfortable night clothes for the pair of you before joining him in the adjoined bathroom. Luca already has towels set aside for both of you, along with lighting one of your essential oil candles, filling the room with the smell of eucalyptus and tea. He was currently kneeling beside the large tub, one glove removed, as his bare hand dipped into the water to test its warmth. You’ve noticed he tied his hair back, likely not wanting to get it wet before bed; remembering he took a shower before you left to meet with your friends. Setting the clothes on the counter as the blonde finally turns the faucet off and stands. Though he must have not heard you enter the room, as he nearly jumps when he turns to find you behind him. A tell of how lost in thought he is considering how acutely aware of his surroundings he normal is. 

“Oh, hi–umm…” You can practically feel the nervous energy radiating off of Luca. His hands fidget with the glove he’s still wearing before taking it off. His nervous eyes can only look at you for a few seconds before letting them settle back on the tub. He's out of his element here – unintentionally causing a standstill between the two of you. The awkward seconds you both are just standing there become increasingly long in his head as he tries to think of a way to break it. Should he just start undressing? Should he help you undress? He doesn’t get very far into the thought process before you approach him, hands gripping lightly on his blazer, deciding for him. 

“Need some help there, big guy?” He can practically feel his mind stop working, letting out a flustered noise.

“I–” He pauses, letting his brain process before continuing. “Yes? But shouldn’t I–”

Your hands help ease the white blazer off of his shoulders, letting it slip down his arms before turning and laying it nicely over the counter. When you turn to face him again, his lips are parted in surprise, brain trying to catch up with your actions. “Luca, you already do so much for me. Let me do this for you. Okay, hun?” He’s clearly still flustered, but nods his head in agreement, letting out a shaky breath as your fingers find the top button of his dress shirt. You refrain from making any comment, not wanting to cause your boyfriend to go on a tangent, but you can’t help but admire his pecs as they’re slowly exposed to you. Eyes tracing the lines of the tattoo you’ve seen a hundred times. Once it’s fully unbuttoned, Luca gives a small roll of his shoulders, helping the silky fabric slip down his arms. Before you can catch it, as it slips down to the floor, the blonde's hands move forward, lightly tugging at the bottom of your shirt. Without any preamble, you raise your arms to allow him to pull the fabric off of you.

The Mafia boss can’t help the way his eyes immediately trail down to your chest before coming to a stop at your hips. His hands subconsciously reach out and brush the tips of his fingers along them and he can feel the way your body shivers at the almost ticklish sensation before pulling his hands back as he realizes what he was doing. He’s so unsure of how to proceed, not used to being this intimate with someone. Yes, this is far from the first time he’s seen you in some state of undress. Except this was the first time he’s ever helped undress you. This is one of the very few situations where you are more experienced, Luca never having gotten this far in a relationship before. Hell, this is his first proper relationship. Though he didn't have the time to casually look for lovers when it came to his line of work. He's thankful because you even accept him for who he is, and what he does.

He’s jolted back to the present once more when he feels your fingers tug at the belt on his pants. “Can I take these off too, darling?” Luca lets out a heavy breath, not realizing he had been holding it.

“Yeah. Can I also–” He brings his hands up to thumb at the button of your pants. Giving your consent, you both undo the other pants. Once they were as far as you each could take them, you both stepped back to finish removing them until the two of you were left standing in your underwear. To speed this part up, you both removed them yourselves; placing them in the clothes hamper to clean later.

Once those were set aside, Luca offered his hand to help you inside the tub. Smiling, you thank him as you step in. A satisfied sigh leaves your lips as you sink into the warm water. Making yourself comfortable against the back of the tub, you reach your arms out – gesturing for Luca to join you in the tub. You can practically see the gears start turning inside his head, his mouth forming a small ‘o’ as he connects the dots. There’s a stutter to his movements. However, you can tell it’s from embarrassment rather than hesitation. He joins you in the bath, eyes so focused on the water it almost makes you laugh. Luca sinks into the water and makes himself comfortable between your bent knees; facing you. 

One of your hands rests on his upper arm as you ask, “Is it okay for me to wash you?” The tips of his ears are still a bright red as he gives a quick nod of approval. Picking up the small cup you keep here for baths, you fill it before pouring the cup over his shoulders. You can’t help but watch the way the water rolls over his skin, eyes tracing over his chest and tattoos. Once his skin is damp enough, you reach over to grab his body wash before pausing as an idea strikes you. “Luca, could you turn around for me? I think it’d be easier to start with your back.”

“Oh, uh, okay like–” He does his best to turn around without sloshing the water too much, making sure as well to not bump into you. Once his back is to you, he looks over his shoulder at you and asks, “Like this?”

“Mhm, perfect thank you.” Finally picking up the body wash, you pour a bit of it onto your hand. After you place the bottle aside, you lather the soap between your hands before reaching up to massage it into his shoulders. He grows a bit tense instinctively before relaxing into your touch, his eyes closing briefly in contentment. Working the soap into his skin, you ease the knots out of his shoulders. By the time you reach his lower back just above the water, he's completely relaxed under your touch. You rinse him off before placing your hands lightly on his shoulders, leaning your head forward to speak. “Lean against me, please?”

He looks at you again, a small crease between his brows. “Like against you?” When you nod, he continues. “But won’t I be too heavy?”

“No, it’ll be fine, I promise. Besides, I like it when you're against me.” Your hands gently urge him to lean back against you, rubbing small circles into his shoulders. It takes a moment before his toned back is resting flush against your chest. The warmth of his skin causing you to smile. Luca swallows, still red in the face, and if anything it grows darker. He can feel the way your heart beats against his back and it makes his own feel like it skips a beat. Not to mention the feel of your bare chest against him makes him glad that you couldn’t see his face, knowing there's no way you wouldn’t tease him relentlessly for it.

You pick up the body wash again, soaping up your hands before slowly bringing them to hover over his stomach. His breath hitches even as you just barely brush him before they fully settle against his warm skin; spread fingers dangerously close to his pelvis. When he doesn’t pull away, you allow your hands to start rubbing the soap into his skin. Your fingers edge towards his elevated thighs, swiping lightly over the place where his hips meet said skin. The effect it has on the blonde is instantaneous; letting out a shuddered breath before dropping his head back on your shoulder. His breath fans against the side of your face in quick pants as your hands massage down his thighs, digging your fingers into any soft skin they can reach. Turning your head allows you to press soft kisses against the side of his face; watching him sink into your soft touch.

Luca felt like he was melting, eyes becoming half-lidded as he relished in your touch. Between the warmth of the water, your chest pressed against his back, your mouth– your hands– you. All of you. He couldn’t help but crave more. One of his hands grasps your wrist lightly, resting there as his other hand reaches up to cup the side of your face, turning his so he can meet your lips. Feeling your smile grow against his mouth makes him kiss you deeper, hand moving to the back of your head as he takes in your lips. Luca could kiss you for hours, the taste of your lips intoxicating to him. He wanted to be engulfed in the feeling completely, drinking in the entirety of you, and only you. Of course, he’d be too embarrassed to ever tell you this to your face.

The water shifts as he turns his body towards you, the blonde’s heavy breaths fanning against your lips every time you separate from each other's mouths. He fully sits up, causing you to tilt your head up as he towers over you, your back remaining relaxed against the tub. When his kisses start to grow feverish once more, you break away with a light laugh, pressing your free hand to his chest and pulling back enough to look him in the eyes; voice hushed as you speak.

“Luca, I haven’t even finished washing you yet. Come on big guy,” Your smile widens at the quiet whine he lets out, watching him pout.

“Can I help you?” When your head tilts in question, he clarifies, “Wash you? I want to wash you too.”

“Sure let me–” Your words are cut off as Luca’s large hands grab your waist, lifting you out of the water enough to switch places with you. He settles back against the tub before setting you in his lap, facing him. You shake your head with a fond laugh. “You didn’t even let me finish.”

“I know, sorry, but,” He blinks, pausing to think for a moment. “This way you can finish washing me while I wash you, yeah?” His hands shift from your waist to rest lightly on the top of your thighs. “What do you think? Hmm?”

Instead of responding, you pick up the cup once more; filling it before tipping it over his chest. He takes the cup from you once you're done with it and repeats the process with you. Pouring more soap into your hands, you pass him that bottle as well before finally bringing your hands to his pecs. Although he knew it was coming, a gasp still left his lips as your hands cupped his chest. Part of yourself is slightly jealous of how soft and large his chest is – though that thought is all but overwhelmed by the content feeling of knowing that this man was yours. Your fingers dig more into the muscle, practically groping him at this point, drawing out a huff mixed with both exasperation and shyness from the blonde that's your in the midst of feeling up. “They’re not that big,” He grumbles.

“They totally are.” You snicker. He opens his mouth to protest, but you cut him off by swooping in for another kiss. It’s nothing more than a peck, yet you begin trailing these light kisses from his lips to his cheek, his chin, down his throat, before finally coming to a stop over his fast-beating heart. “I’m not complaining, though. Do you have any idea how beautiful you are? How damn attractive you are, physically and otherwise?” He gasps as your kiss turns into a nip, leaving a pink mark over the place where his heart rests. “I’m so lucky to call you mine.”

He’s unsure how to respond to your words immediately, feeling overwhelmed by his emotions. Biting his lip, he tries his best to return to his initial task; pouring some of the body wash into his hand before setting it aside and bringing his hands to your waist. They hesitate there for a moment before he starts to massage the soap into your skin. He flinches slightly when you cup the side of his face with one of your hands, your thumb forcing his teeth to release his now-swollen lip. His hands tighten their hold on your waist and the resulting groan that falls from your lips stokes the heat twisting in his stomach. 

“You’re so beautiful.” The words are out of his mouth before he can even think. Leaning into you, he buries his face in your neck, brushing his nose back and forth against your collarbone. “So damn gorgeous.” Leaving a trail of kisses, he makes his way to your shoulder. “So gorgeous.” He mutters again. His hands slip further down, gripping the plush of your thighs. Luca feels your hand trail to the back of his neck, playing with the few short strands that have slipped from his ponytail. “You're so sweet to me. Sometimes I really don’t know what’d I do if I didn’t have you. And even if I get embarrassed and don’t have the words to give back to you, you always know how to read me like a book…” He brushes his nose against your skin once more before pulling back to look into your eyes, his gaze glimmering with nothing but pure affection. “I love you…. so, so much.”

Leaning your forehead against his, you smile warmly, returning his gaze with just as much vigor. “I love you too.”

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

The two of you stay in the bath until the water starts to turn cold, wanting to get properly cleaned but also not wanting this new experience to end. After giving yourselves a proper wash, you both drain the water, reluctantly get out and dry off. Pulling on your sleep clothes, the pair of you fall into bed together, getting comfy under your big blanket. Luca takes up his usual position; lying partially on his side with you tucked into his chest, one arm wrapped around your waist while he runs the fingertips of his other hand along your back. One of your arms is tucked under your head while your free hand plays with the now loose strands of his hair.

“Would you really want to?” He suddenly asks; voice lowered into a whisper, believing if he spoke any louder, you'd somehow be overheard. You hum in question, giving him the sign to continue, “Y’know, want to be–” he stops for a moment, before looking down at you. “Do you want to be intimate with me?” 

You're silent for a moment, searching his eyes. He looks utterly serious about his question and, after a moment, as you throw his own words back at him, “Do you?”

“Y–yeah?” His immediate response is hesitant before responding again, firmer this time. “Yes.” He lets out a shuddering breath, focusing on the feel of his hand trailing over your back. “I’ve thought about it for a while, but I know I’m pretty inexperienced. I–” his eyes dart away from you as his expression grows hesitant. “I know it’s dumb since we’ve never really talked about it, but part of me was worried that it would…” His voice trails off, leaving his sentence unfinished. You, however, could pick up what he couldn’t say.

A frown tugs at your lips, wanting nothing more than to shoo those thoughts away. “Luca, please look at me.” His lips purse for a second before he meets your gaze. Leaning forward, you press a soft kiss against his lips. He returns it, sighing contentedly as the tension melts from him. He’s much calmer when you pull back. “I don't need sex to have or want to be with you, hun.” You press another kiss to his lips. “I didn’t fall in love with you with the thought that I’d eventually get sex out of you. That would have just been a bonus. If you had even wanted that, of course.” You say with an easy shrug.

He swallows, before nodding, a small smile finally returning to his face. There’s a quiet moment before he whispers once more, “I’ve never done it before.”

“And that’s alright.” You acknowledge as your hand brushes his bangs back. “That’s why I don’t want to rush into any of this. Or be potentially inebriated.” Snuggling deeper into his chest, you rest your ear against his heart. The consistent thump of his heartbeat is the perfect song to lure you into sleep. “We can talk more about it tomorrow, okay? I’ll answer questions you have.” He agrees with a short hum, pressing a kiss to the crown of your head. “I love you, Luca.”

“I love you too.” He buries his face deeper into your hair. “More than anything.”

─── ⋆⋅☼⋅⋆ ───

It might take a while, but there will eventually be a part 2. I'm just a very slow writer lol.

Likes are nice and we do appreciate them. However, comments/feedback is what really motivates us to continue writing. Even just a keyboard smash or emojis are a joy to see!

[stargirlfeyre]

The most interesting thing about people being upset about Nesta and Rhys’ relationship even after they “made up” in Acosf is we literally told y’all that this would happen and y’all just dismissed it as being Nesta hate.

Let’s break it down.

Rhys and Nesta did not make up. They bonded over their shared desperation for saving Feyre. In that situation emotions were running high and former animosity and resentment were pushed aside for their love for Feyre. This can also be compared to Feyre and Nesta “bonding” over helping Elain and the humans in Acowar. They didn’t have a genuine connection between them but a shared goal. That’s why when that goal was no longer something being worked towards by both of them, their relationship deteriorated once more.

This is the same case for Nesta and Rhys. Saving Feyre was that goal. Rhys was in a situation where he had to rely on Nesta to save his wife and child and now that they’re both out of that situation, there’s nothing binding them anymore. There’s nothing that they agree on anymore. The desperation for Feyre’s life wore off and it’s like “Oh yeah. Now I’m remembering why I didn’t like you”.

And it all boils down to the fact that they had no conversation. No one in these books did. They didn’t talk about their issues, why they resent one another, the hateful things they have said both to each other and to their shared loved ones etc. There was absolutely no closure for that on either end. They spent a year hating one another and said not a word about it after…

And the craziest thing is we said this was needed and y’all dismissed it. We said that these relationships can’t truly heal without a conversation and y’all said “actions speak louder than words”…well not in cases like these babes. Nesta saving Feyre, while admirable, does not change how she treated her and how everyone else disliked her for how she treated Feyre. And your response to that was to call us ungrateful and say that we expected too much from Nesta when really that’s not the case at all.

What we were saying is, this is a group of people with so much hatred and animosity between them that they’re literally threatening to murder one another. That the years of abuse and mistreatment will not be fixed with an action (no matter how big the actions) but with multiple conversations.

Conversations are important.

We told y’all this. Rhys and Nesta do not have a relationship and they never truly healed the hatred between them. That’s why it’s so easy for the both of them to yell at one another or resort to insults when they’re pissed at each other. They don’t understand how the other feels, they don’t listen to one another, they aren’t sympathetic towards one another and all because they didn’t talk.

Yes they both love Feyre but your love for someone can’t be the only thing helping you get along with someone else. And that can go for the relationships with many of these characters. Sjm is afraid of deep verbal confrontations when it comes to these characters and that’s why their relationships seem so stagnant.

[jqmalikhsgib]

beauty and the freak

three

you were pissed! the moment you heard the news about your mom moving into the house right across the street from you. you knew she only did that to piss your father off.

it angered you to your core! who the hell does she think she is?! your dad tried to keep you from blowing a fuse, but it was too late.

by the time eddie arrived to pick you up, you went off, cursing, yelling, and screaming. Eddie’s just hummed along. he was use to you constantly going on about how much distain you have for your mother.

“eddie?! are you even listening to me?”

“im sorry sweetheart, but is it such a bad thing she lives right across the street? its not like you have to see her everyday. im sure she’ll be in her own little bubble just like before.”

you scoffed. “that’s not the point edward!”

eddie sighs. “what is the point baby?”

you didn’t know what to say. mostly because you didn’t know why you were so angry by this. but eddie was suppose to just understand.

“as my boyfriend you’d think you would give a fuck about how i feel.” you roll your eyes.

eddie sighs once more. he really didn’t have the energy to argue with you.

“edward!”

“hey! i understand you have this huge issue with your mom, i do! but you do not talk to me like that. do you understand?!”

you huffed and folded your arms while looking out the window right when eddie parks.

he grabs your face a little roughly. you looked into his eyes before he speaks. “do you understand?!”

“yes, sir.”

“now, may we please have somewhat of a decent day? i canceled dnd tonight to watch my girl cheer today.”

you had been begging him to come see you from the moment the two of you started dating. unfortunately he had a dnd game every friday as well. he refused to cancel it simply because, just like cheer is important to you, dungeons and dragons is important to him.

this week was a very convenient one for him to cancel. gareth was grounded, mike and dustins family was going to visit their friend will, and lucas joined said basketball team, so he figured he might as well cancel tonight’s events.

“really?!”

eddie smirks. “yeah!”

you squealed before hugging him tightly. “you’re gonna enjoy it, i promise.”

“doubt it. couldn’t care less about basketball. but i do like that short little skirt you have to wear.” eddie smirks.

you playfully roll your eyes as eddie gets out of his van and goes to open the door for you. the two of you walk hand and hand, all eyes on you. people still didn’t get the appeal of eddie munson, but you couldn’t give three fucks.

your relationship with eddie was amazing. he treated you like the queen you are. no one else’s opinions mattered.

a few of your friends actually loved eddie once they got to know him. he was funny and charming so they understood. others, not so much.

“yn?!”

your turned and saw your best friend, ariana. “what’s up?”

“did you hear about what happened last night? apparently jason cheated on chrissy again, but she caught him in the act.”

“it was about time. we kept telling her he’s no good.”

“yeah, but that’s not the worst part. she forgave him instantly! he kept apologizing to her all night and she made him promise he’d never do it again.”

“she can’t be that dumb?!”

eddie was already over this conversation. not giving a single fuck about jason fucking carver.

“im gonna go find the guys. see you later, baby.” eddie kisses you passionately before walking away.

“god! you’re so lucky. eddie is literally the perfect man.”

you honestly couldn’t argue with that. eddie was the perfect man! and if this closed minded, dumb fucked town actually got to know the metal head, they’d realize he was the sweetest man on the planet. you were so sick of them judging eddie simply because he liked listening to heavy metal and playing a fantasy game.

eddie made you the happiest. no boyfriend before him has ever treated you the way he did. eddie was the kind of boyfriend to buy you flowers every date, run to the store to buy you pads or tampons when needed, cuddle you whenever you just needed someone to hold, listen to anything and everything you had to say, gives you random forehead kisses, and so much more. he was perfect in your eyes.

not to mention, the only man who could put you in your place. eddie was a very dominant man when it came to the bedroom. it’s something you lacked in the past. most guys just want to get off! they couldn’t care less about your needs. eddie, eddie made sure you came at least once before he fucked you into oblivion.

“i know! god, ari! he’s so romantic! just last night he took me out to this fancy ass restaurant outside of hawkins. he bought me my favorite flowers and spoiled me with anything i wanted! i don’t understand how i got so lucky with him. it still baffles me.” you slowly shake your head as you looked over and spot eddie talking to his group of friends.

“please find me an eddie, girl!”

“his best friend gareth is single!”

“the one with the short hair? he’s cute!”

“mhm! he’s still very skeptical of me. but i can ask eddie to talk to him for you. im sure he’d finally give me the green light as well. so far ive only been able to win dustin over.” you sigh.

it was hard on your relationship with eddie. you wanted—no, needed his friends to like you! you weren’t going anywhere, you let eddie know that the moment you took interest in him. he knew that of course! but his friends would still put things into his head. calling you suspicious, saying girls like you don’t date guys like them, saying you’re using him, calling it a bet like you’re in so basic ass rom-com! it hurt. you love eddie with your whole heart. sure, the two of you were young, but you knew eddie was your person. you wanted to marry him someday and have as many little munsons ruling the world in the future! but winning the friends over was a must! and you’d do anything and everything to try and prove to them you’re not going anywhere.

“set it up! we can double date.”

“texting eddie now,” the first bell rung. you say goodbye to ari as eddie walks over to you and walks you to your first class of the day.

taglist: @lov3withurgency @sunshineandwitchery @melaninjhs @baileebear @am0iur @lovesanimals0000 @pipsqueakkitten @paygurlxoxo @peachy4u2

if anyone else wants to be added to the taglist please kindly let me know <3

[lyrakanefanatic]

MY THE GRANDEST GAME PREDICTIONS PART 4!!!

——————————————————————————

4: brady daniels

closest to in the game: knox landry, odette morales

love interest: odette morales

person he dislikes the most in the game: savannah grayson

personality traits: kind, outgoing, loyal, loud, intelligent, interesting, strong, cheerful, warm, charismatic, and talented

negative personality traits: incredibly insecure, impatient, needy, jealous, irritable, and desperate. he spends a lot of time building up his charisma so people don’t see past it to what lies underneath.

HIS CHARACTER OVERALL HEADCANONS:

• he’s really tall. like, 6’4 tall.

• he has sandy blond/dirty blond hair and tan skin, (he defo gets really dark during the summer) and he’s 22 years old.

• he has a golden retriever personality

• he was definitely that one golden boy at school. did well in class, was popular, and got into many school programs that were extremely difficult to get into as well.

• although he was bullied when he was younger a lot because he had crooked teeth and went through puberty late. he used to go home early every day from ages 8-11 because of stress stomach aches. (if yk how those feel ☹️)

• a lot of kids that knew him at those times always get shocked whenever they realize it’s him because he has straight teeth now and changed himself completely to fit in

• he’s AMAZING at cooking. you best believe he can gordon ramsey up any dish and makes people shed literal tears at how good it is.

• him and libby grow a special bond over it, so sometimes brady cooks dinner and she bakes desserts

• is anazing at math too, and solving questions in his head

• he’s an only child

• he’s actually very strong, but doesn’t really know what to do with the muscle as he can’t fight that well 💀 (although he will if somebody talks crap about the people close to him)

• he does his best to defend his friends and family no matter what and will always speak up for them, even though sometimes it makes him uncomfortable

• forced to listen to kanye west born to listen to taylor swift

• he had a phase where he would get bad grades in school on purpose to fit in. he ended up eventually realizing that it wasn’t worth it so he got his act back together and started getting 100’s again

• he has the bluest eyes you will ever see

• he’s great with parents and can immediately make good first impressions

• he is not great with people if he feels uncomfortable with them, and usually ends up finding an excuse to leave 2 minutes into the conversation (although he tries his best to leave good first impressions with people no matter what)

HIS RELATIONSHIP WITH THE OTHER CONTESTANTS:

• lyra kane: him and lyra actually end up being really close, although brady knew that she distanced herself away from him quite a bit due to the fact that he was close with knox. (and we all know the deal with lyra and knox 🙄) once they do get closer though, they end up being besties. brady always makes fun of her for being short, but never takes it too far bc although he’s a foot taller, she can still beat him up. example:

• “hey i think we finally found the answer to this riddle! it’s: ___!”

• “oh hey we did!”

• “up top!�� *brady reaches his hand way over his and lyra’s head, grinning*

• “fuck you.”

he ends up asking her for advice on how to ask out odette bc her and odette are besties, and lyra is always happy to help (as long as brady doesn’t ever hurt her. if he does, she will reach her hand down his throat and rip his skeleton out. 😊)

• knox landry: him and landry are best friends and spend a lot of time in the game hanging out with each other. although there is a significant height difference, (since brady is 6’4 and knox is 5’10) that’s never stopped knox from kicking his ass in boxing. they spend a lot of time going over clues together, and during these times brady accidentally spills about his crush for odette. knox instantly makes fun of him, but also finds it cute and tries his best to create moments where they can be alone together for brady. brady usually has to drag him out of fights and tries to be the “peacemaker” one in the scenario bc knox will beat anybody up bc he has no chill LMAO

• odette morales: ever since he saw odette, he immediately found her interesting and beautiful. he loves how she can be so quiet and soft spoken and yet still draw people in and make them listen. he also loves how easily he can make her blush. although she only ever has a faint blush, brady can tell when she’s nervous. she darts her eyes away, everytime she smiles it’s a downward smile, and she looks for an opening to leave the room quickly. he finds it’s so adorable but doesn’t do it too often because he wants her to stick around so he can talk to her. i like to think of their relationship as being similar to nick and bree’s from legend born, except nick and brady are the same people and bree and odette couldnt be more different LOL. he loves to call her “smart girl” and has never undermined what she’s been able to do. plus, she gets him to open up his music taste and now he likes SO. MANY. different artists it’s not even funny. odette is semi tall at 5’8, but even then brady towers over her and honestly it’s so new to odette because she’s been taller than, or the same height as, almost everybody in her life.

• savannah grayson: brady and savannah aren’t that close due to the fact that their personalities are way different, but they’re still friends. brady does kind of feel threatened by the fact that grayson is her brother and feels like she might get special privileges from that, but like knox, tries not to hold it against her because she’s like 4 years younger 😭😭 brady grew up playing tons of sports, so they usually find each other in the gym (if there’s one at the house they’ll be staying in on the island) late at night. at those times, they usually 1v1 in basketball, but brady has gotten her to try other sports. although they aren’t that close, they’re still good friends. (even though brady felt the most threatened by her in the beginning)

• gigi grayson: brady definitely got bored one day when it was super slow at the house on the island, and slipped her coffee, and ever since then gigi declared that they were best friends. he also is very much taller than her, although he could not manage her crazy self if he tried. he always tries to cheer her up when he sees that she’s under the weather (like if she can’t figure out a riddle or sum) and makes sure she’s okay. they have done so many karaokes together it’s not even funny, and brady sometimes gets scared of how extroverted he is. AND HE GREW UP BEING THE POPULAR EXTROVERTED KID!! 😪😪

• rohan: he finds rohans quick comments and comebacks funny, but also gets a bit envious at times of his never ending confidence. he felt the same way about rohan as he did about savannah at the beginning of the game, but as they got closer, he started warming up to rohan more. although rohan wins significantly more when it comes to casino games and whatnot, brady still wins the other half of the time because he uses gambling mathematics to win (and whenever he does, rohan calls himself a nerd.) brady has made fun of rohans accent so many times, but stopped when rohan started threatening to beat him up. ☠️

——————————————————————————

OKAY SINCE ALL THE NEW CHARACTERS ARE DONE, THE NEXT ONE IS GOING TO BE ABOUT THE CONTESTANTS WE ALR KNOW

IM THINKING OF DOING GIGI OR SAVANNAH FIRST. WHICH ONE DO U GUYS WANT??

[blurredblu]

Why I made Eggman harsher on Sage in my Frontiers rewrite

A reader left me a review for Sonic Horizons on FFN asking why I wrote Eggman to be harsher to Sage. I think the messages we had are informative enough that I want to transfer them to a post on my blog here.

I've anonymised the reader and only made grammatical-level edits to both our messages for clarity and correctness. The reader's messages are indented whereas my responses are not.

Okay, I've got to ask: why are you making Eggman harsher on Sage? He can’t really hate her when she exceeds her function that he made her for and along with having a intellect to talk with.

Hi there!

Eggman is a narcissistic supervillain who holds nothing but disdain for those who diverge from his vision and has no reputation of working with or respecting others' opinions. Sage is his creation the way that children can have narcissistic parents who grow unreasonably disappointed and angry that their children do not cater and adhere to their specific visions, whims, and emotional states. It doesn't matter that, reasonably and objectively speaking, Sage is intelligent and highly capable, because Eggman is not a reasonable or objective person who holds other in any regard higher than he does himself

His and Sage's relationship isn't meant to reflect two reasonable and well-adjusted people, but an unrepentantly evil megalomaniac and his guileless creation who only has one purpose to her existence, a purpose which Eggman's personality makes nigh impossible to sustainably achieve

But that's why he felt a connection with Sage because he created something that he can be proud of and despite all of Orbot and Cubot mistakes and fumbling he keeps them around for some conversations and people to knock around. The Egg Memo did also show what his childhood was like and the fact he was stuck way longer with Sage to grow to appreciate her. Yeah, he's a Narcissist but he still would have pride in Sage and she gives him that longing he wanted as a child and what he could imagine what Maria was like when she was alive. Sometimes evil people can grow to love someone which gives them a different reason to conquer/destroy the world. Plus, if Joker can fall in love and start a real family (an evil one, mind you) so can Eggman. But this is your story and I'm not here to force change I was just wondering.

Hi again!

I should first dispel any notion that this rewrite is supposed to respect or be faithful to Frontiers' interpretations of the characters. As a matter of fact, I'm writing Horizons specifically because I found the characterisation of all the key characters, including and especially Eggman, to be lacking in some way. If you're reading Horizons with an expectation that I am ignoring what Frontiers has established, it is purposeful, to the point of literally being the purpose of this fic in the first place.

On that point, I find the way that Frontiers 'humanised' Eggman to be very boring, predictable, and not well established according to what we know of his character in all the past games. It is very in line with Marvel/DC superhero/supervillain plot beats, or something parodying those beats like Megamind does, to have supervillains actually, in truth(!), have a kernel of Humanity, Sympathy, Compassion, a Human *Non-Socio/Psychopathic Heart, unlockable finally by fulfilling some Freudian conception of familial love that was lacking in their (obviously tragic and loveless, because how could it be any other way) childhood or some such. This storyline, to me, is an absolute snore. Eggman, I have found, is a very compelling and likeable supervillain who has accomplished being that without very popular and predictable plotlines about discovering the Power Of Love that other villains or characters have been routinely subject to.

If Eggman were the type who valued connections or somehow, some way, wanted connection with a being who was in some sense equal to him, it is (1) not hinted at all in most of his existence and (2) not established in a convincing way in Frontiers given point (1). If he built any statues commemorating Literally Anyone But Himself in Eggmanland or had something other than his own face be his logo on every piece of technology he owns, perhaps I could be a little more convinced of the idea that he actually would like, appreciate, and try to nurture something resembling an equal partnership. As things stand, I'm not convinced.

Horizons starts from after Forces where he tasted success and it was all torn away after he worked with a jackal, another person, who in the end exhausted his usefulness and could not help Eggman's cause, and Eggman was ultimately beaten again despite having won. Horizons follows an Eggman who is pulling out all the stops while still remaining his narcissistic, clownish, unrepentantly evil self while creating and exploiting highly advanced technology and, in some senses, being way in over his head about it while still remaining fiendishly clever. He is not like you, or me, or other supervillains so popularised in comics. He is just evil. Period. To me, that does not mean he is uninteresting or unlikeable; far from it. I like him as he is and I want to tell a story given the way that he is.

*Editorial note (one that I haven't communicated with the reviewing reader but write for the current one)

The idea of goodness and humanity always seems to include the stereotyping of sociopathy and psychopathy as inherently evil, which I do recognise to be false and the realities to be much more nuanced. It contributes to a narrow viewpoint about human nature and humanity that to have a Human Heart is to have a Squeaky Clean Bill Of Mental Health, and that those are the only ways in which villains can be compelling, relatable, or likeable to an audience, none of which I think to be true

On another note, though I use narcissistic as a qualifier, I don't use it to mean that Eggman has narcissistic personality disorder, or NPD, proper. I also don't think that someone having NPD or narcissistic traits automatically makes them evil; reality, again, is far more nuanced than such a flattened picture provides. At the end of the day, though, Eggman is extremely and cartoonishly self-centred and self-loving in all his ambitions to take over the world, which can only be aptly described as him being narcissistic