#we had to take care of their farm while they were away a bunch of times n stayed there when my parents were gone n he was always Laying The

[tamagotchikgs]

i am so envious of how soft everyone but My eyes look, ,, they r all so pretty n like. smooth. n i just have droopy thick eyelids that make me look like a very sick very old dog that u dont want to look at because it just makes u sad

[lilith-vodkaaunt-of-demons]

In an unmarked laboratory in North Eastern Kansas.

Breathing heavily, Cass stood up and took a look at her handy work, swiping copper curls away from her eyes. It had taken some effort, creativity, and lots and lots of cursing, but the room was finally finished. Mere months ago it had been a vague image of a dream of an idea, but now it was finally complete. Her friends and colleagues all laughed at her. Her parents had even gone back on their word to fund her Graduate School, telling her they had agreed to fund her schooling for a career, not a dead end obsession. But look at her now! In a laboratory! With real equipment! And funding! It didn't matter that she'd never heard of the government department those two bozos in their ridiculous white monkey suits claimed to be from, they'd handed her a functionally bottomless grant, all the equipment and time she needed, and told her only one thing.

"Report everything to us. No matter how miniscule you think it is, no matter how insignificant. If your coffee tastes different after an experiment, report it." What a bunch of weirdos.

"Ha...haha...hahaha hahaha! Finally! Now that the room is finished, all I need to do is start the process!" Cass crowed gleefully, giddy with excitement and anticipation. She once again looked at her work. She had to admit...it looked like the room of a person suffering from unmedicated schizophrenia. In the center of the 15x15 room was a circle, about 4 feet in diameter, inside the circle were symbols, sigils, and diagrams from Alchemy to the Zodiac. Just outside that circle was a ring of solidified salt, pressed into an impression on the floor. Spreading out from that across the floor, up the walls, and even on the ceilings were words in every language from Aztec to Sumerian, and religious iconography from every religion from Christianity to Zunism.

Cass had spent years preparing for this. Using every cent, every favor, every resource and scrap of goodwill she could find in preparation for this. She was finally going to prove to everyone that she wasn't some obsessed lunatic. She was going to prove the existence of Higher Beings. And to do it, she was going to summon a demon. Now all she had to do was start the process.

It was easy. She stepped up to the center of the circle. The focal point of the entire array of binding spells, prays, and words of power she'd inscribed in every surface of the room save for this cirlce, the one clean spot. She pulled out a scalpel and sliced the inside of her forearm, letting the blood bead up, then drip down and pool on the floor. She'd never understood the idea of cutting your hand. You used those. This was much easier to take care of, and you still had the use of both hands. After a few moments of letting the blood collect, Cass wrapped her arm in a towel, pressing down to make the bleeding slow, and stepped back out of the salt circle.

She briefly left the room, going to the first aid kit she left just outside the door to see to the minor laceration. After all, she didn't want dripping blood to ruin her sigils and protection charms. Once the bleed stopped, she returned to the room, a notebook in hand. She opened the notebook and began to chant.

400 miles away, at the Kent's Farm...

A young man, not dissimilar to Clark Kent when he was younger, was helping Pa Kent fix up the old tractor while Ma Kent tended to the animals. It seemed the pair had figured out what was wrong with it, but it was in a particularly hard to reach place.

"Sounds like we're gonna need to pull the whole engine out to fix this." Pa Kent said, a bit of disappointment in his voice, "That's gonna be pricey. Might have to wait a while." He mumbled to himself, one hand rubbing his jaw, leaving a trail of oil along his face, "Gonna be tough getting the crop in without ol' Bessie."

"Naaaah, don't worry about a thing. I can patch her up well enough to get the harvest in, then we can take out the engine over the winter." Danny said, his hand turning opaque. He then slid his hand through the chassi of the tractor, "Hold on," He continued, his face suddenly turned similarly opaque, "Better see what I'm doing here." He said as he shoved his face into the chassi of the tractor as well, "Yup! We were right! Duct busted. I can patch it up nicely, should last until the harvest is brought in!" He called from inside the tractor.

Pa Kent shook his head and chuckled, "Even with everything Clark did, I don't think I'll ever get use to that. Go ahead and patch her up. Then we can head in for lunch before tackling the field." He said, giving Danny a pat on the back. Suddenly a bright green glow emenates from the inside of the tractor before Danny pulled his head and hand back out.

"Let it cool, and it should be good an' patched." He said proudly, soot and oil covering his entire face and one hand.

"You uh, got somethin' on your face, Danny."

"Oh? Where?"

"Uh. there." Pa Kent said, pointing to the entirety of Danny's face before tossing him a rag, and turning to head into the house. Danny began to wipe his face off, then started coughing a bit, "Yeah, that oil can taste somethin' awful if it gets in your mouth." Pa said, thinking Danny had just tasted some of the oil, but Danny kept coughing, and the coughing got worse until Pa turned around to see Danny on his knees, one hand over his mouth, another around his throat like he was choking. Black frost and steam poured from Danny's mouth like he'd just run a mile on a freezing December morning, but it was the middle of the day in early September, nearly 90 degrees out in an open field. Pa ran over to Danny, and knelt down in front of him, "You okay, boy?" He asked, worry plain on his face.

Danny shook his head and gasped, "Something!...Big!...Coming!" Was all he could get out before, in a flash of light, he'd transformed into his alter-ego, Danny Phantom, and in a streak of green, blasted off into the sky, soon followed by the telltale boom of super sonic flight.

Danny was already about a mile above the ground, still coughing up what he could only describe as frost mixed with soot and rotten eggs. It was like his Ghost Sense had gone into overdrive, and happened to run through a Coal Mine and a Landfill on it's way out. Even Pariah Dark hadn't made his Ghost Sense react like that, especially not at this distance. Whatever it was, he needed to get there yesterday, because it, whatever it was, was absolutely massive and even from there, Danny could feel the hostility radiating from it. Bad News didn't even begin to cover whatever this thing was.

Meanwhile, back at the Laboratory...

Cassi began chanting the invocation she'd pieced together. It had been like figuring out a puzzles who's pieces had been hidden all over the world. Words from disparate languages that fit together to make an ancient call to those Outside. But Cass had managed to find the words and put them together. She hoped she'd put them together in the correct order, otherwise who knew what she was calling out to.

At first, it didn't seem to be working. No crack in the ground or air appeared. No red skinned, horned imp appeared in a puff of crimson smoke. The lights didn't even flicker as she read the incantation. Cass was about to stop when she saw a ripple run across the surface of the pool of her blood in the center of the inner circle. First a small ripple, like a drop of water hitting the surface of a puddle. Cass continued chanting. Then another ripple, from left to right, like something skimming the surface. Cass continued chanting. Then it seemed to stop.

Cass chanted for a minute or two, spurred on by the unusual behavior of the blood. Right as her throat was beginning to ache, a hand burst through the surface of the blood, pale skin stained red and rivulets of blood ran down the arm that followed. The hand gripped the edge of the pool of blood like it was much deeper than it could possibly be. Then another hand burst forth, also followed by a pale arm.

Cass stopped chanting, what she had called had obviously already broken through, and was now simply pulling itself out. She watched in fascination that slowly mixed with a bit of fear as she realized that the being that was pulling itself out of a pool of her blood looked exactly like her, save for it's eyes, with black sclera and yellow iris. Cass watched with matched Fascination and Fear as the being continued to pull itself from the pool, and she realized that the more of the doppleganger that was out of the blood, the less blood there appeared to be.

Cass also noticed, with some surprise, that while she had initially the creature to be naked, it (she?) was in facted, clothed. She wore a strapless, low-cut black ball gown that clung to her (Cass's?) body in all the right places to accentuate her feminine form in ways Cass rarely did.

Once the woman (demon?) had completely pulled itself through, and the puddle of blood completely disappeared, she stood up, smiling at Cass in what she assumed was it's purposefully unnerving way. She had to admit, this is not what she had expected. In truth, she hadn't really known what to expect, but this wasn't it. She had thought there might be a chance that whatever she summoned might try to imitate her form, but in a more threatening manner. Boils, pustules, sores, and lacerations, things to make her terrified, or perhaps a more perfect version of herself, with the things she considered defects or unattractive about herself washed away.

She was not prepared for a rather normal looking, though perhaps less desheveled and better dressed, version of herself. She was actually so distracted by the pure mundanity of the entity before her that she jumped and screamed when the creature spoke.

"D̷̺̉o̷͍̎ ̵̥̏y̸͔͗o̸̡̾u̵̹͠ ̶̟̀k̵͎͌n̴͙͗ȯ̶̟ẅ̴́͜ ̶͚̀w̵̭͘h̵̻͝y̶͓̌ ̵͎́p̴͍̿e̸̮͛o̵̠͝p̶̩̓l̶̡̃è̵̮ ̵͖̈́ȃ̵̳l̶̹̂w̵̞̋a̸͛ͅy̷͉͒ş̷̇ ̴̪͐s̶̥̉u̶̞̅m̵̻͑m̷̢͒ò̸̤n̵̬̏ ̸̨̈ǘ̸̳ș̷̃ ̵͙͌b̸͙͑y̵̹͆ ̴̣͐ǩ̷͎i̷͖͒l̶̺͛l̴͎͛ị̴͂n̷̞͗g̵̮̍ ̴̌͜a̷̮͠n̶͕̚ ̷̩͝a̶̧͐n̵̽͜i̴̥̽m̶͉̑a̸͓͌l̴̤̓?̶̼̂" It asked, it's voice like a thousand people speaking almost in unison, making it a bit hard to understand.

Cass, after screaming and jumping so hard she almost fell over, took a deep breath and reoriented herself, "I...What?" She asked, between the synchronicity and her being startled, she hadn't processed the question.

The creature repeated itself, this time the effect is lessened a bit, "D̷o̵ ̴y̶o̵u̶ ̶k̶n̵o̷w̸ ̷w̶h̷y̴ ̴p̵e̵o̸p̸l̵e̶ ̷a̸l̶w̵a̷y̶s̶ ̶s̶u̴m̴m̴o̶n̵ ̵u̶s̵ ̵b̵y̴ ̵k̵i̶l̶l̵i̶n̴g̷ ̶a̷n̷ ̴a̵n̴i̷m̸a̸l̸ i̵n̷s̸t̷e̵a̶d̷ ̶o̶f̸ ̶o̵f̶f̴e̵r̸i̸n̴g̵ ̸h̸u̵m̵a̸n̸ ̸b̶l̷o̴o̵d̶?̷" As it asked the question, it lightly stepped to the edge of the circle, lightly touching something unseen with one of Cass's fingers.

Cass blinked, then looked down at her notebook. She flipped through a few pages before looking back at the woman with her face, "Um...No. Why?" Cass asked. This wasn't what she was expecting at all. Something felt...off. Like maybe she'd made a mistake that she wasn't quite aware of. But whatever that may have been, she was sure she was right about the sigils, the protective charms, the binding spells. There was no way the entity could escape.

Almost as if it could read Cass's mind, it grinned, "Connection. A Goat. A Lamb. A fowl of some sort." Now the entity was speaking in Cass's voice, which only served to cause her more discomfort, "They cut it's throat, release it's....delicious life blood, and summon us. Giving us Horns. Hooves. Wings....mmmmflesh." It purred, running it's hands up and down it's, Cass's, body, "Giving us...Connection."

"Connection to here? To Earth?" Cass asked. She was having trouble following. Her brain was being sluggish for some reason. She couldn't seem to put thoughts together in her head, and the entity wasn't making any sense.

"The smarter ones leave the sacrifice dead in the circle. The less smart ones kill but leave the body out of the circle, and dead bodies are so easy to manipulate." The Entity explained, stepping over the edge of the circle, "But it's the Smartest ones that make the same mistake over and over, because you don't want money, or power, or anything like the rest of them. You just want answers." It continued as it walked up to Cass, wrapping an arm around her waist. Cass, meanwhile, felt a pang of fear jolt through her, but she couldn't quite remember why. Something about words and circles. Boundaries? "In the end, it's your pacifism, your mercy that kills you. Had you just beheaded a chicken, or disembowled some livestock, you might have lived to tell others not to seek these answers." It whispered to Cass, "But you've handed me the keys to your body, and oh, I am going to make myself right at home."

"My...blood...." Was all Cass could say. Demon, Devil, whatever it was, it was exerting some kind of anesthetic influence on her, slowing her body and her mind, but she was still able to make the connection. The sigils, the symbols, the protection charms and spells. None of them had worked because Cass had used her own blood. Whatever it was, it had bypassed them all because Cass was outside the barrier.

Not Cass giggled delightedly, "It makes it all the sweeter that you figured out what you did wrong too little too-"BOOM! Not Cass began to say, but was interrupted by the sound of something that had been moving very fast hitting a Warded Steel Wall. Slowly, as if reaching through thick mud, a white-gloved hand slid through the wall, then another, and a boot, then another. Finally, a very red, very unhappy face slid through after it.

"What in the fu-Whoa!" Danny said, his ghost form flickering, half reverting him to human, "What is up with this room? First, it acts like a non-newtonian liquid despite me being intangible, and now this? What's going WHOA!" Danny shouted, just noticing the pair inside with him. His vision flickered between two women and a woman and some kind of vile chimera beast starting to overshadow the woman.

The Not Woman smiles as she looked Danny up and down, "Well, aren't you an interes-OOF!" It started to say before getting interrupted by Danny tackling it, separating it from the woman it was trying to overshadow. "My, you're stronger than you look, Ghostling!" It cackled, "Maybe we can have some fun!" It struck out at Danny, the human fist reinforced by the power of the beast hiding behind it. It wasn't the hardest Danny had ever been hit, but it certainly wasn't a Box Ghost Punch either.

"Look Lady, I don't know what your whole deal is, but around here, we don't just overshadow people for shits and giggles. And we certainly don't let people with your kind of vibes just hang around, either!" Danny said, wrapping the beast in ecto-energy while fending off the Not Woman. Something not dissimilar to a Ghost Portal was still open on the floor, but Danny could feel from just looking at it that whatever was on the otherside was nothing like the Ghost Zone.

"Oh ho! You really are impressive!" The Not Woman growled, a grin on her face, but it was clear that she was struggling with the ecto-shield he'd wrapped around her true body, "But you don't know what you're meddling with, Daniel. Beings such as yourself are easy to influence!" She said, sucking the strange creature into her body, freeing her from the ecto-shield he'd wrapped around it. She launched herself at Danny, and opened her mouth, a vile, black sludge ejecting all over Danny's face.

"How-Eugh! Forget it, I don't even want to know how you know my name! I've had more than enough of you! Time. To. Go. Home!" Danny roared, wrapping the Not Woman in a bear hug as she continued to vomit the black sludge on him. Then he spun towards the portal, and used all of his might to slam her down into it, knocking her off of him and into the portal. Using his portal powers, he grabbed the edges of the tear, and began to force it shut.

As he's closing the portal, black hands reached through and pull him against the half-closed portal, and a screeching voice shrieked, "You and I are not finished, Child of Thanatos! Descendant of Azrael! You will seek me out soon enough!" It screeched, grabbing at Danny as he struggled to close the portal.

Danny eyes briefly flashed red and he growled back, "Enough! I don't know who you are, but go back to where you came from!" He shouted, slamming the portal shut with all his strength. The entity gone, the portal shut, Danny was suddenly overcome with a wave of exhaustion, his Ghost Form fully reverting back. He fell to his knees, he head swimming as the effects of the room finally began to effect him. Only then did he notice the searing pain from the left half of his face, where the Not Woman had vomited the nasty black sludge on him. Knowing what was coming next, Danny reached into his pocket and pressed the emergency button on his phone before passing out.

Somewhere...

Danny floated in a black void. It wasn't the first time he'd had a dream like this, though he couldn't rightly recall the first time he'd had one. It was actually somewhat of a relief, since most of his dreams had to do with a cavalcade of rogues from his rogues gallery. Or so he'd thought. Something was different this time. This time, it didn't feel like he was alone in the black void. He could hear movement, whispers, feel eyes on him. Something was there with him. He goes to rub his eyes, and feels scale-like skin on his face. Suddenly he's looking at his own face, except half of it isn't his, it's monsterous.

"I TOLD YOU I WASN'T FINISHED WITH YOU, GHOSTLING!" A familiar, shrill voice screeched and cackled. Danny screamed, and sat up from the hospital bed he was in, his heart, ususally much slower than normal, nearly beating out of his chest. He looked around, and quickly recognized the medical floor of the JL Watchtower. His emergency call must have gone through. He sighed with relief, and laid back in the hospital bed. He attempted to relax, but that dream continued to bug him.

Soon enough, a doctor came in, "Well, given your...unique biology, we can't say anything for certain, but now that you've stabilized, you should be fine." The doctor said, looking through some chart, "Though, there is one thing we should probably look into..."

"Hold on." Danny said, holding up a hand, "Stabilized? I passed out because of the funky stuff in the weird room, what do you mean Stabilized?"

The Doctor rubbed the back of his neck, a nervous gesture, "Well, Daniel...when the WatchTower emergency crew found you, you seemed to be having some sort of...episode? You kept changing into a ghost and back to your human form. In fact, you were doing it the entire time you were unconscious, and only stopped shortly before you woke up." The doctor explained, "And then there's..."

"And then there's....what, doc? What's going on." Danny asked, a bit exasperated.

"It might be better for you to see it."

"See. What. Doctor." Danny ground out. The Doctor held out a mirror. At first Danny hesitated, the dream coming back to him briefly, but then he grabbed the mirror from the doctor and held it up and...nothing. He looked completely normal, black hair, blue eyes. Skin was fine, "I look fine."

"Transform, Daniel."

Danny did as he was told, and transformed, then gasped and dropped the mirror, his hands flying to his face. It wasn't the same as the nightmare, exactly, but it wasn't good, either. Starting at about the half-way point across his forehead, the skin of his forehead began to turn black and hard, pulling up until it all came together in an unmistakable black horn coming out from his left temple. The Sclera of his eye partially black, highlighting the neon green even moreso. Whatever that thing was, it had done this to him, whatever this was. And it had been right, that wasn't going to be the last time they saw each other.

[livingdeadblondequeen]

Heated Push

This is the first of a two-part with Daryl/Reader in an ABO universe. Set between S3 & 4; Smut

Chapped lips pressing firmly against yours

Hard muscle smashed against your soft breasts

Warm callused hands running up your inner thighs, spreading them apart

Y/N bolted awake, panting and taking in her surroundings. She was alone in her cell at the prison. It was a dream, yet so much more than a dream. Her body felt hot, her skin sensitive against the bedding, and she was throbbing between her legs. It had been a while since it had happened, but Y/N knew what this meant. “Fuck.”

Throwing off the sheets that were twisted around her body, Y/N swung her legs to the edge of her bunk and got up, throwing on some loose clothes as she did before poking her head around the sheet she used as a door. Typically, she would have just bolted through the opening into the public area but with the pheromones she knew she was putting out, it wasn’t the best idea if she didn’t want a bunch of alphas pouncing on her. No, there was only one alpha that she wanted in particular at the moment or at any time.

Spotting Maggie not far away with Beth and her father, Y/N frantically waved the brunette over. Confusion masked her face until she was within a couple of feet of Y/N and picked up her scent. “Whoa.”

“Tell me about it.” Y/N huffed as she pulled the other woman into her cell for privacy. “I woke up like this.”

“No warning?”

“None,” She replied. Y/N hadn’t had a heat since a month before the world went to hell and the dead rose thanks to the suppressants they had found then the malnutrition from the rough winter they had after the farm fell. Now it seemed her first one after a couple of months of safety and eating well, her cycle had returned with a vengeance. Thankfully, she hadn’t woken up in a full-blown heat, but she wasn’t too far off either. “I need your help.”

Maggie’s eyes widened. “My help?”

“Not like that!” Y/N exclaimed. “You’re beautiful and sexy but…”

“I’m with Glen and I’m not the alpha we both know you want,” Maggie said with a devious smile. “Speaking of Daryl, do you want me to get him?”

“He’s on a run. But I need you to get Carol and help me to one of the heat cells.” Y/N answered as she chewed on her lip, trying not to let the small moan that suddenly bubbled up in her throat as her core clenched at the mention of the Alpha that the omega inside her desperately wanted. 

Her relationship with the bowman was complicated. They had met in the beginning when the Dixon brothers had joined the group in the quarry. Both alphas, especially Merle with all of his crude talk, had been a bit rough and scary at first. Yet they settled into the camp and started helping the group by hunting for food. 

Y/N had felt herself drawn to Daryl, her eyes following him when he wasn’t looking and a few times when she wasn’t watching him, she’d look up and catch him looking at her. Yet he hardly ever approached her, if she wanted to talk to him, Y/N was the one who would have to engage. The first time she did, she picked up his scent; a mixture of the woods, grease, with a hint of smoke. She had a feeling that the last part was due to his cigarette habit, but she didn’t care, the omega in her wanted to roll around in the scent of him. Thankfully Y/N was still on suppressants at the time or she might have done just that though it didn’t keep her from seeking him out.

After Merle disappeared and the camp fell which led them to head to the CDC, Y/N was trying to figure out who she was going to ride with when Daryl came up behind her. He let her know that there was an empty spot in his truck if she wanted to take it. He chewed on his thumbnail as he waited for her answer, and for a moment it was hard for her to remember she once thought he was an intimidating alpha. She nodded quickly before yelling over her shoulder to the others that she would be riding with Daryl. 

It was during that trip that Y/N realized how touch-starved Daryl was. Right after they had said their goodbyes to Jim, she had told Daryl that she was sorry about his brother, reaching out to squeeze the hand not on the steering wheel and saw him jump at the contact. As long as it wasn’t wanted, Alphas and omegas appreciated casual touches, but Daryl’s reaction told her that he wasn’t used to them. As they continued to drive, Y/N ran over the time she’d been around Daryl in her mind. She couldn’t remember one time where someone touched Daryl or he touched them in a kind way. She had seen Merle punch him in his arm or shove him on occasion, and then later there was the fight between Daryl, Shane, and Rick. Those instances coupled with the scars she had seen peeking out of Daryl’s shirt told her a lot, no wonder he had so much anger. 

After that, Y/N made sure that she did what she could to help Daryl. She would sit as close as she could when they would eat meals first at the CDC, then at the farm, brushing her leg or arm against his as they ate. She also offered small touches, not too much to help soothe him as they would sit and talk at the end of the day, him telling her about the search for Sophia and later at his bedside after he had been hurt. When they found out the little girl had been in the barn the whole time, Y/N had given him a hug, only to have him shove her off of him and stomping away.  

Y/N had gotten separated from the group when the herd came through the farm, but thankfully she was able to stumble her way to the highway and found herself engulfed in Daryl’s arms when the group spotted her. He mumbled an apology into her hair as he held her, saying he thought they had lost her. 

After that, when they were on the road, the two of them were always together unless Daryl was hunting, though things remained platonic between them, even with them sleeping next to each other at night. It wasn’t until he had returned after leaving with Merle that he finally admitted that he wanted her as more; he wanted her to be his. They had been ‘together’ ever since but had not had sex nor were they bonded yet. First the Governor, then building the community within the prison had taken precedence. Y/N wished he were there now though because with her heat she knew that both of those things would be happening. 

Maggie nodded in understanding before she disappeared back out of the cell. Knowing she had gone to look for Carol, Y/N grabbed a few things she would need for her heat. Her pillows, her few blankets, her water bottle, and a shirt she had hidden away, not much for an ideal nest but better than a bare floor or bunk.

“Y/N?” Carol called to her from outside her cell door.

Y/N shoved the privacy curtain to the side, coming face to face with the older Omega and she saw sympathy in her eyes. Carol wrapped her arm around Y/N’s shoulders, directing her out of the cell block. “Oh sweetheart, let’s get you out of here and away from everyone.”

Y/N nodded as she let Carol and Maggie lead her out of Cell Block C and to the Administration building. One of the things the group had done when making the Prison their home was to turn the old intake cells in the Administration building into makeshift nests for the few omegas when needed. It allowed for the omegas and their Alphas or, like Y/N, a single omega, to have some privacy during their heats, safely away from the others.

After getting her settled, Carol hugged Y/N one last time. “Is there anything else you need?”

“Daryl,” Y/N replied. Carol’s brows shot up in surprise, but Y/N quickly continued. “He is on that run for a few days, can you tell him what is going on when he gets back? I don’t want him to worry.”

“He’ll do that no matter what when he doesn’t see you, but I will make sure to head him off as soon as he returns.”

“Thanks,” Y/N said before Carol moved to shut and lock the door, leaving the younger omega to her heat.

*Next Day*

Pulling his bike up alongside the car Glen and Rick took on their run, Daryl killed the engine. Those who were nearby and had seen them return all came over to see how it went. They had been lucky, not only did they find a large haul, but they had found it quickly which allowed them to return to the prison earlier than planned. 

Daryl noticed Zack, the kid who had been on gate duty, approached him. “Hey man, Carol left a message for you. Said to come to find her when you got back.”

“She say why?” Daryl asked, wondering if something was wrong. 

“Nope, just find her as soon as you come back,” Zack stated with a shrug of his shoulders. “I don’t think it was anything bad.”

“But sounds important if Carol left word,” Rick commented. “We’ve got this. Go find Carol.”

Daryl nodded in thanks to the man before grabbing his bag and heading to find his friend, hoping it would be quick. While checking in with Carol was something he did usually when he came back from a run, there was someone else he wanted to see first, Y/N. Returning early meant he would be able to see her sooner, something Daryl was happy about. Three days away from his little omega had been plenty. Technically, she wasn’t his, she didn’t bear his mark, hell they hadn’t even had sex, but he had been courting her with the desire to make her his. He had known he wanted her from the first moment he saw her at the quarry. He just wasn’t sure it was mutual. 

Not only was he craving her sweet scent and touch, but Daryl had also found a little surprise for her on the run and couldn’t wait to give it to her. After not seeing Carol anywhere around the outdoor kitchen, Daryl decided to check cell block C. It was most likely that both Carol and Y/N were there anyway. 

Daryl was still a couple of doors away from Y/N’s cell when her scent, wild berries, and cream, hit his nose. His first thought was that he picked it up despite the distance due to their time apart but as he threw back the blanket that covered the entrance he knew that wasn’t it. The scent of ripe berries overwhelmed him and his alpha senses kicked into high gear. His mate was in heat. She was in heat and probably suffering from its effects alone, without him. Her rich scent had gone straight to his cock, and the only thing Daryl could think of was finding her. 

While fainter than within her cell, Daryl was able to follow the scent trail she had left behind, growling slightly when he picked up Maggie’s alpha scent mingling with Y/N’s though it faded quickly and was replaced with Carol’s. He followed the two scents out of the cell house to the administration building. He knew that was where the secured heat rooms were and Daryl was relieved to know that Y/N was safe from the others while she was so vulnerable. 

Between her scent and the sounds of her whimpers, it didn’t take long for Daryl to figure out which cell she was in. The holding cell was the furthest from the entrance, allowing for the most privacy possible. Daryl felt his heart clench when he caught sight of her; Y/N was naked in her makeshift nest, the cot mattress along with a few blankets and what looked like one of his shirts that he knew had gone missing a few weeks before. The alpha within him preened knowing that she had wanted to be surrounded by his scent, even if it was from his shirt. Her hand was between her legs, rubbing frantically in an attempt to get some relief from her heat but Daryl could tell the moment she caught his scent by the way her eyes snapped open and looked for him. When they landed on him, she whimpered. “Alpha, it hurts.”

Hearing her whine snapped Daryl into action. Using his set of keys, he quickly unlocked the door and let himself in. The door hadn’t even closed before he started to strip off his clothes; his poncho, vest, and shirt hit the floor while he kicked off his boots. The room was saturated with her scent and if his cock hadn’t already been hard, it certainly would have been then. As he removed his pants, he gave himself a few strokes to relieve the pressure before he lowered himself to kneel between Y/N’s thighs. “It’s okay ‘mega, I’m here. I’m going to take care of you.”

Though her thighs were coated in slick, her pussy swollen with arousal and need, Daryl laid his body on top of hers, giving her the much needed skin to skin contact. Y/N’s knees rose to cradle his hips as he pressed his mouth against her neck, kissing, nipping, the feel of his scruff brushing against her neck sending shivers through her. He used his left hand to hold himself up while his right cupped her breast, his thumb brushing against her hardened nipple, causing her to moan. 

Daryl teased her breast for a minute before moving his hand away, trailing his fingers down her stomach. His touch felt amazing, leaving a trail of fire in its wake. Y/N jumped when she felt him press his calloused thumb against her clit. She moaned softly, she pushed against his hand as he started to rub firmly. Y/N could feel her eyes wanting to roll back in her head from the pleasure of his thumb sweeping back and forth across her bundle of nerves but it wasn’t enough. “More, Alpha. I need more. I need your knot.”

“You’ll have it sweet ‘mega, but I need to get you ready first before I fill you with my cock.” Daryl mumbled against her skin as he licked and bit at her neck. Not hard enough to break skin, not yet. He needed her less glassy-eyed and foggy with need. 

Moving her hands from their position on his wide shoulders, Y/N threaded her fingers through Daryl’s hair and used them to pull his face away from her neck, up to her mouth. Her lips crashed against his hungrily, as she tried to convey to him the desire she felt for him. He seemed to read her thoughts as his lips pressed against hers greedily before she nipped at his bottom lip with her teeth. His lips parted automatically, and their tongues intertwined. 

Daryl moved his fingers to her opening, sliding one in just a little before drawing it back out and circling her sensitive folds. All of the teasing movements sent Y/N into such a state that when his fingers pushed inside of her in a deep thrust, she arched her back in pleasure. She broke away from his lips and cried out. "Daryl!"

"Come for me Y/N, let me see you…" He whispered as he picked up the pace of his hand. The teasing touch he had started with was gone now, as he fucked her with his fingers. 

Every thrust of them brought her closer to the edge until she honestly believed she might be going insane from it. She felt him push into her one more time before she finally did shatter, shuddering, the waves of pleasure radiating up through her body. Daryl watched her orgasm take her over as he continued to pump his fingers inside of her, working her down from her high. He kissed her tenderly as he removed his hand from inside her. His fingertips ran back up her body, stopping briefly to caress her heaving breasts before he grabbed the arm that had been resting at her side. He laced his fingers through hers, before bringing them to his lips.

Though her body was buzzing and shuddering in the last tremors of her orgasm, Y/N felt her pussy throb again quickly when she felt Daryl roll her over onto her stomach before moving her onto her hands and knees in front of him. Her belly quivered, she craved the feel of him inside of her, she needed to feel his knot inside of her or she was going to combust. She rolled her hips back against him, rubbing herself against his throbbing erection. Daryl growled against her neck at her teasing. Not being able to wait another second, he took his thick length in his hand and guided it between her legs towards her entrance.

"Alpha…" Y/N gasped, as she felt the swollen, slick head of his cock probing her flesh. She bit her lip when he found her opening. Daryl held her hips, and she swallowed a moan when he pushed into her. He was stretching her in the best way possible.  

As soon as he was completely sheathed inside of her, he stopped, and she knew he was letting her get used to the feeling of him. She felt impossibly full, but didn’t need him to be gentle; she needed more. She flexed her thighs, sliding back and forth on him to signal that she wanted him to move. He bit back a moan, as he felt her beginning to move on him. She felt tight around him, her inner walls contracting every time she moved, trying to lock him inside her. His hands gripped her hips to stop her, taking control as he pulled out of her until only his tip was still inside her. She whimpered at the loss of him, but the whimper turned into a loud moan when he thrust back in.

Again, Daryl moved out of her, until just the tip was inside, and then back in fully. He repeated the action a few more times, making Y/N moan. Her thighs trembled, while her body jerked as he rammed into her, the swollen head of his cock pushing and hitting her deep inside. His hips started moving, pumping into her at a demanding, hungry pace. One of his hands left her hip cupping her breast to knead the full mound to try and distract him from her neck. It took all of his willpower not to sink his teeth into the flesh of her throat.

She closed her eyes and let sensations engulf her. Daryl could see her mouth open slightly as a moan escaped her when the friction inside of her was too much, or the head of his cock pushed on a sensitive spot. He gripped her hip harder, moving faster into her, the feel of her around him pushing him further, wanting to go deeper into her for his knot to lock them together. Her face twisted more and more in pleasure as he felt her starting to flutter around him. She felt him grip her hips tighter as his thrusts became faster and more erratic.

Her walls clamped down around his cock, as her orgasm rolled over her. He held her tight when he kept moving against her for his own impending release. He relished the feel of her muscles flexing tightly around his cock. His orgasm coursed through his body as he continued to pump into her, his knot expanding until it was notched inside her. As soon as they were locked, he came hard, filling her completely. His orgasm seemed to go on for hours though he knew it was only minutes. When his body finally came down from his high, he felt like he was going to collapse. Not wanting to crush Y/N, he rolled the two of them onto their sides, wrapped his arm around her, and tucked her head under his chin. “You feel better ‘mega?”

Y/N nodded before yawning, feeling half asleep already. She had been in agony since her heat had come on full force, she tried her best to relieve the ache within her by herself but it wasn’t even close to the satisfaction she was feeling now thanks to the knot now locked inside her. It wouldn’t be too long before her pussy would be throbbing again with need for Daryl. 

“Get some rest Y/N,” Daryl ordered. “I’ve got ya.”

Please reblog or tag a friend to share.

Thanks to @littlegodzilla, & @minervadashwood for their help!

[faegoddessog]

31: Samhain

Well loves, we made it, Every damn day (except that first one, which I'll rectify when I consolidate) Thanks to @slowsweetlove for providing the Austin based jungle-gym for me to play on. And thanks to all ya'll for hanging out with me , and Austin and sometimes Callum for October.. Hawtober? Hmmm...

Those of you that like to read my mind smut, I'll be taking a digital break for a while. Y'know: touch some grass, do some knitting, bake some bread, paint, declutter, put up some preserves or something cool like that.

Enjoy the end of my own creative challenge for #DDofAB- October 2024

Here is my ongoing masterlist of this project. Keep and eye out for the story in full (or at least less parts) to be posted

My other works are here if you are interested!

Warnings: missing the man, finding the man

You haven’t seen hide nor hair of Austin since those two weeks in New York.  He had pretty much moved out of his hotel and into your apartment for the duration of his stay.  He took you to plays, made you dinners and made sure a day didn’t go by without showing you that you mattered to him. That and he made sure your pussy stayed wet. You’d not had so much sex in your entire life. It was amazing. 

Then he was gone.  

Before he left, you two had agreed that, for now at least, you would keep it a ‘no strings attached’ kinda relationship. You had a whole bunch of work in the coming months and he was filming. He had explained that when he is working, he sometimes can’t really do anything else and usually his phone is taken from him.  He had texted you, off and on for a while, but it had been radio silence for some time. You knew he was filming in Hungary then here stateside somewhere. It was surreal and sometimes you felt like those two weeks were from someone else’s life. The lingering fear that it would be another ten years before you saw him again was kept only at bay by Callum. 

Cal had been far more communicative. He even popped into New York a couple times. Honestly he was far better at maintaining a friendship than Austin. 

“Yeah, it’s not like he doesn't care, he just gets caught up in creating character and the artist aspect of it all. Time kinda doesn't mean anything when he gets like that.  If you can handle that, you’ll be ok,” Cal had told you once at dinner. 

Funnily enough, neither of you were as driven to fuck without Austin there. You joked how he was the sexy lynchpin. 

Did you fuck anyway? Yeah, of course you did. But it was way more of a ‘friends with benefits’ feel than it had been with Austin.

Today though you are in the most unlikely of places. You are in Ohio for your cousin’s wedding. It was also Halloween, or Samhain, as she called it.

“It’s pronounced sow-een,” she kept telling anyone near with ears. She had this love affair with Halloween, excuse me, Samhain, so her wedding was gothy and occult themed. It was the only time she felt she could get away with it. Still there were grumbles from the relatives.  Skulls, ravens and ouija boards outfitted each table, complete with Tarot decks and black candles as wedding favors. 

She had arranged a palm reader and fortune teller  the way other people had DJ’s and photo booths.  The venu was out in a barn on her friends’ farm. You had come out that afternoon to help set it all up. The wedding wasn’t until after dark, of course. 

Her little sister, who was in her mid teens, had brought over a Ouija board and plonked down on the table where you were sitting and tasting the special "black widow" cocktail complete with black glitter and a red spherical ice cube. You thought it was a drink that tempted fate, and hoped it wasn't predictive of your cousins marriage to be.

"Play with me," she had asked, "it's not fun alone."

You agreed, what harm could it have really.

She asked things like:

Are there spirits in the barn? 'no'

Has anyone died in here? 'yes'

Am I crazy? 'no'

Have I met the person I'll marry?

The planchet wandered to ‘no’ for her and practically zipped to ‘yes’ for you. 

“Oooo, who is it! You have to spill, I’m dying to know!” she said wagging her eyebrows. She idolized you, living in the big city and making your own way in the world. You had promised her a trip to New York for a graduation present. She was definitely one of those black sheep of your midwestern family. Destined for something far bigger than marrying a local boy and popping out kids. 

“I don’t know, could be anyone,” you laughed, “I live in a city with eight million people.”  

“Ok, ok! Let’s try this. Ouija Board, where is this man?” she asks. 

O-U-T-S-I-D-E came the answer. 

“That’s unhelpful,” she made a sour face, “unless he’s like a forest ranger or something. Know any forest rangers?” 

“No,” You just laugh it off. Ouija Boards were supposed to be for talking to the dead. You are pretty sure that you aren't going to marry someone dead.

It was then that you heard the tell tale sounds of an old motorcycle in the driveway.

“Oh yeah, they said there was a movie being filmed about motorcycles and that they might be using the front drive to turn around in,” your little cousin says, walking towards the barn door. “Isn't that so neat, a movie, here!! I wonder if it has anyone famous in it. OMG that’d be lit! 

“I dunno, I’ll ask” you hear a deep voice outside. 

You turn just to see the silhouette of a tall man in the bright square of the barn door. 

“Excuse me, is there a restroom I could use here?” the timbre of the voice is unmistakable if layered with a Chicago accent. 

“Austin?” his name drops out of your mouth like a spell.

It’s bewitching, the way he strides into the barn, his heels thunking on the old wooden floor. The lights finally uncover his features, and Austin only has eyes for you.

“Is it you? Is it really you,” he says disbelievingly. 

“Me? It’s fucking you!” you retort, or try to. He is on you in seconds, gathering you in his arms. 

 He smells like cold air, motor oil and cigarettes. He kisses you, tasting faintly like whiskey.  The world falls away and it’s only you two. 

“I’ve been missing you,” he says, placing his forehead on yours.

“Me too, so much,” you breathe back, hardly believing this is real.

You stay there for the span of two breaths, until your little cousin squeals, “Oh my god it was right, he WAS OUTSIDE!” 

The End

credit to @strangergraphics for the graphic

Always tag me: @purejasmine, @slowsweetlove, @richardslady121, @austinbutlerslovers, @tadpoleteef, @allittakesisoneflight

"I've been tagged by you before Lumiere!": @thisworldisntrealhoney,  @1nho,  @megangovier, @briaandthephantoms, @andro-inherdreamworld @callumsgirl @blombardo  @fefeisastar @hacunamy @nestito702 @denised916 @jayydep @r0m4nitcl0v3r @heyidc03, @secondchild-2, @flander42 @natural-born-rebel-spirit @lecosymood @kathrynzaragoza @bsunshinexo @jayydep @ifyouloveweedletsgosmoke

[bomberqueen17]

doings

so. I'm home from the farm and now i have to yet again rearrange a bunch of my house. cut for wittering about personal stuff.

Dude's company laid off most of his team a while back, and as a result, decided it was a bit silly to keep renting office space for now just him and one other guy to come into some of the time. Dude genuinely did go in four days a week, but he had to agree it was really pretty dumb to rent an entire office suite for him to sit in sometimes.

the company didn't want any of the furnishings. they wanted some of the networking equipment, but-- the previous company, before it was acquired, had bought most of the office furniture. this company didn't care about it. so they sent dude one of those big foam-padded locking hard-sided cases to load the networking equipment into, and told him to leave behind whatever he didn't want in that office, and they'd negotiate with the landlord about disposing of it. (This is normal; when they moved into that suite, under the previous company, the previous tenants had abandoned it full of furniture and garbage, and dude's folks had just picked out what of the garbage they felt they could use-- mostly, chairs-- and the landlord cleared out the rest.)

Dude of course asked his former coworkers if any of them wanted their desks or chairs. One of them is kind of a hoarder, so he actually rented a Uhaul to get the desks out-- they were super nice work tables actually, very large and heavy, and there were eight. I wanted one, and he was perfectly happy to drop one of them off in our garage, and didn't even want us to reimburse him for part of the Uhaul. He has a use for two more, and the other five are just... in a storage unit somewhere.... if you need a really nice workbench lmk i know a guy who has some. LOL.

(No they're SUCH a pain in the ass to move.)

So anyway yesterday was the day Dude had agreed with the landlord he'd be clearing out the space and turning over the keys. he was going to do it by himself, but I was like.... how are you gonna turn in the parking pass and then get your car out of the garage it's in? well he'd have to pay for parking someplace. hmmm no. and like.... some of that shit is heavy. no.

so I went in with him. I cleaned the fridge really thoroughly, went through the kitchen cabinets and threw out garbage etc., while he took down all the networking equipment and wrapped it all in bubble wrap and put it in the giant hard case.

there wasn't enough packing material. here my years of expertise working in the shipping department of a camera store came into play. We wound up using whole clean rolls of paper towels to fill in around the sides of the case, and then could close it and know everything in it was held firmly and would not rattle.

He inventoried the chairs. Two were still the original expensive Steelcase chairs the first company had bought them, so we took those. There was a really sturdy folding table with adjustable heights that I insisted we take. And then there were the rest of the rolls of (brand-name!!) paper towels, and assorted other things that I thought we'd use. We put all the garbage into a pile near the door for the custodial staff, making sure to put anything that was *not* garbage far away so it wasn't ambiguous. There were a number of large monitors and things around that we had no use for, so we left them. I threw out empty packaging where i found it, and broken power adapters, but left a box of assorted power cords and other cables. We left the whiteboards, markers, and erasers. Left the dish soap, left the clean dishes and wire rack that held them. I threw out most of the huge pile of takeout utensils that had been accumulated, but left a small curated selection including a set of metal utensils someone had obviously brought in from home and abandoned.

It was pouring rain, but we wheeled everything out balanced on the office chairs all down the block in the rain, and went out for pho on the way home. And now we have several nice office chairs and I'm going to throw out my two worst antique-salvage ones that don't roll, once I decide which are my worst two.

And that folding table is going to hold a sewing machine, because I had been using the desk in our home office on the days when Dude was going in to the office, and I obviously can't do that anymore.

I'm also trying like heck to clear out one sorta quadrant of the basement to fit the work table (it was really never ideal as a desk, adjustable-height to Not Quite Low Enough, and it's 30" deep but also 96" long which is ridiculous). I want it as a counter-height workspace for cutting fabric, although I'd prefer something 36" wide.... but it'll do... but that means I need to clear out a bunch of stuff and make room and....

well I seem somewhere to have lost my ability to sort things. I was never great at it, and by now it's just. Gone. Idon't know how to determine what items go together. I'm great at organizing a work kit-- my purse for example, every single item in it has a designated spot and that's fantastic and i am always prepared with the things I need in my purse. My car, I made a seat-back organizer and it works fantastically well and holds every thing I need in it and I have now several times saved the day because i knew right where The THing was.

But that's notably not sorting. I can organize, but i can't sort. I need to distinguish among all these things and put them into large storage containers so that I can later retrieve individual items from larger containers. I don't know what category the items are. All the helpful advice people give me about how to organize things, how to tidy a space, involve doing some kind of sorting. I can't sort things. Poeple are like "just pick one thing you know needs to go X and do it!" and i'm like. That's sorting! That is sorting. I don't know how to sort. I can't categorize items. i can only interact with them individually. "This is a thing I will need. This is a thing I will not." That's sorting. I can make like, one decision like that in a day, and even that I will question. Making piles of objects by category means I have a one-object-deep layer over my entire work surface within a short period of time, and then I take everything I took out of the box to sort, shrug, sweep it back into the box, and give up, having achieved literally nothing except for having wasted the entire time I spent working on it. So all the "can't you just" advice people give me is Not Helpful and unfortunately I am all out of the grace to appreciate the sentiment behind it, which is nobody's fault but is also the incontrovertible truth.

So if you have advice, maybe don't, unless you have a good way to like, reconceptualize the entire exercise, which I have not thought of, and which is NOT "throw it all out", thanks, I don't need that one either and I won't be nice about it. FYI.

I have attempted to recognize things that are actual garbage, and discard them, but that's about as clever as I can manage to be. SO it's a work in progress and it's going slower than I want and mostly, it's just me taking piles and moving them to a different area of the basement, thereby rendering that part of the basement unusable. Blergh.

But if i can get this table into position, then I will have a work surface, and incidentally will have rendered that whole area of the basement, which is lined with huge wire shelves I purchased intending to organize myself with and then never managed to do so and instead filled with unsorted junk, accessible, and so if I ever find either medication that helps me, or a friend to help me, or a new brain lying around somewhere that I can co-opt and use, I will be able to (in fantasy cuckoo-land) organize some of this junk onto those shelves. I can hope. And then it would be a usable workspace. With a nice work table. Isn't that a compelling fantasy???

I've covered the card tables I was using to cut fabric on with boxes in the meantime, meaning I can't work on any sewing projects, but the card tables were at a height such that I could spend about seven to eight minutes cutting fabric on them and then be crippled with crunchy lower back pain for twelve hours, so let's be real here I was not getting a whole lot done with that setup anyway.

Anyway the other new challenge is that both dude and i need to come up with some kind of schedule for our days because we're both cooped up fairly unstructured in this house and it's got to be something or we'll both lose our minds.

[boygiwrites]

Harley D. Dixon 18

An amazing edit inspired by this story! (Cred to Cora_Line99) Harley D. Dixon's Pinterest Board! Harley D. Dixon's Playlist!

📖Chapter List.

Author's Note.

I want to give a shout out to Cora_Line99, who made a beautiful edit inspired by this story! :)

I'm just constantly blown away by all of your support. Buckle up, because this is a crazy one. Enjoy!

We break through the trees just half an hour later. The sky yawns wide and blue, the vibrant pastures cracking open like summer fruit. It's so beautifully weird, prancing through the grass in my soaking wet clothes, hair plastered to my neck, a bundle of Cherokee roses in my hand, the smell of pollen on the breeze. My squeals and giggles ring out through the morning as I race through the tall wheat, toward the farm.

It's the happiest I've felt in a long time.

Dad trails behind me, all the way up the thin path and through the gate, until we reach Andrea standing watch.

She tips her straw-coloured hat at us, looking us up and down with a small, sceptical smirk. "What the Hell happened to you guys?"

"We went swimmin'!" I laugh without explanation, skipping past without a care in the world.

"Sure," She chuckles, watching me go. Dad asks her where we can find Carol, and she points to the RV. "Oh, uh. She's in there, just knock."

Turns out, swimming's real easy. Weren't as scary as I thought, 'cause yeah, I guess I was a little scared, but all I had to do was kick my legs like I was riding a bike and swish my arms like a bird, and then that was it! I can't wait to go with Sophia, when we find her. She gon' love it.

We step up to the RV together. I wait with ants in my pants as Dad knocks on the door. He takes a respectful step back after, giving me a lopsided smile. He tugs on my wet ponytail. I whack his hand away, giggling, and glance over at the main gate, where Rick's car is parked on the gravel driveway. It must be time for them to take Shane, soon. The doors are all open, a couple supply bags strewn across the back seat. Rick and a few others are checking maps and pointing and nodding in agreement around the hood, while Shane leans against the opposite side of the car, head hung. The sight makes my stomach roil strangely and my fingers tighten around the flower stems. I know he deserves this. But did my Momma deserve what happened to her? Before my own thoughts can consume me, my attention is pulled back as Carol's muffled voice calls out, come in. 

I take a deep breath and follow Dad inside.

I notice straight away all the crumpled tissues littered on the floor. Smells like sadness in here. It's so dark from the drawn curtains that it feels like we're in a cave. When my gaze finally lands on Carol, who up until now I thought was just a lump of blankets on the sofa, I straighten. I realize we must look like a pair of idiots. She watches us stand here awkwardly in the narrow walkway, a grown man and a little girl dripping pond-water onto the floor, holding a bunch of white roses in my muddy hands. I think there might even be algae in my hair.

Wiping her wet eyes, Carol mutters, "Sorry for the mess." 

She was scared of my Dad last night. She still looks wary, but maybe she likes flowers, 'cause she cracks the tiniest smile.

"Oh. This is nothin'." Dad assures her, picking his nails so he can avoid lookin' her in the eye. "Should'a seen our old house. We're used to mess."

Sometimes I like to wonder if our paths would'a crossed had the world not ended. Most the time, answer's no. But somethin' tells me Carol ain't lived a life so different than ours. Both had cruelty, and bad people, and suffering. Bet we both shopped at the Dollar General, too.

I like to think we would'a run into each other at some point or other.

"We picked ya some flowers." I tell her, fiddling with them. "Cherokee roses. Found 'em growin' by a pretty lake this mornin'."

Her smiles grows a little bigger.

"Story goes that when the American soldiers were movin' the Indians off their land," Dad starts telling the story, mustering up the courage to meet her gaze, now, "The Cherokee mothers were cryin' and grievin' so much, 'cause they was losing their little'uns along the way to disease and starvation that the elders, they said a prayer; asked for a sign to give 'em strength. Next day, these roses grew right where the mothers' tears fell. I ain't fool enough to think there's any flowers growin' for our family... but I believe these ones bloomed for your little girl."

Holding them out to her, I add, "To make ya feel a little less like the whole world's against ya." 

Her eyes grow shiny with tears. Uh, oh. Did I say the wrong thing?

Peeling the blanket off her body, she stands and comes to kneel in front of me. She takes the flowers, and then hugs me. Even though I'm wet and I must stink like fish and dirt, she hugs me. Pulling back, she places a little kiss on my cheekbone. It makes my skin tingle warmly.

"Thank you." She sniffles, before standing and placing another kiss on Dad's cheek. I swear he goes red as a cherry. "Thank you both."

He begins, "About... yesterday—"

She shakes her head, clutching the flowers to her chest. "You're a good man, Daryl." She says. "Shane's wrong. People can change."

Just like yesterday, all he can do is nod. He ain't the best with words, just actions.

Carol turns to arrange the flowers in a jar, looking a little brighter than before.

Once we're outside, I see the white roses sitting in the sill of the now-open window, soaking up the sun. Across camp, I also see Lori, Jacqui, and Carl sitting at the picnic table together, smiling like they were watchin' the whole interaction. Glenn, sitting near the fire, trying to look angry but not doing a very good job of it. Dale next to him, sending Dad a stern look, and after Dad nods, an accepting look on his face.

"I'm goin' out, now, chicken." Dad calls out from behind the towel I'm changing in front of. I peel off my wet clothes and they land on the ground with a solid slap. Man, it feels good to be outta those. I pull on a blue tank top over my white shirt. "Look for the kid for a while."

"Oh, okay." I hum, and then ask, "Can I come, too?"

"No. You're stayin'." I hear him rooting around for his boots. "I ain't up for losin' another little girl while I'm at it. 'Specially not mine."

I really wanna search for Sophia, but I guess I've had my fair share of wandering around the woods for now.

With a sigh, I agree, "Fine. You gotta come back before dark, though."

Amused, he sarcastically quips, "Yes, boss."

After stepping into my khaki shorts, I push past the towel and head into the tent to look for my hairbrush, but my bag ain't here.

"Dad, you seen my bag anywhere?" I ask with a frown, upturning our blankets and sleeping bags. "I can't find it."

"Should be there." He shrugs. "I ain't touched it."

"Me, neither."

The duffel with our clothes in it is here, and so's Dad's bag, but mine's up and vanished. I swear it was here just this morning. I check the truck, and the truck bed, and even under the truck, and then the tent again, and around the fire. By that time, Dad's about ready to head out.

He hauls his crossbow over his shoulder and places a quick kiss on my hair. "Just keep lookin', you'll find it. I'll see ya later. Be good."

"I will." I mumble out of habit, left standing alone in our camp.

Guess I'll just have to use someone else's brush.

"Hey, Harley." Lori greets me when I reach camp again, after Andrea happily lends me her hairbrush. "Would you like to join us?"

Looks like they're still working on those spelling quizzes, the ones Carl was sayin' his Momma makes him do sometimes. It don't sound very fun, but it'll kill some time 'till Dad gets back, so I take a seat next to Jacqui at the picnic table. They hand me a lined piece of paper and a pencil.

"You know I ain't good at this," I pre-emptively warn them all, to save myself the embarrassment later. "Wait, no. I'm not good at this."

Lori just smiles. "That's alright. That's why we're doing this. Now, Carl's doing some big words, but you were in second grade, right?"

I nod, taking a peek at his page. Survival, Radishes, Difference, Counterpart. Wow, those are big words.

"We'll get you to do some one-syllable words, then; start small." That's what we did back at the quarry. "You wanna put your name at the top?"

"But you know it's mine."

"Just do it," Jacqui winks at me. "She likes to do things the old way."

Shrugging, I carefully pencil in the letters of my name onto the first line. Harley. I ain't done that in months. Looks like shit, kinda. But Lori tells me Well done. Then I gotta try spell Place, which is the weirdest word ever. When since does c make an s sound? And what's with the e?

As I'm working on the next word, Road, Lori asks, "What school did you go to, Harley?"

"Northwood Elementary." I muse, tongue stuck out in concentration. "Didn't go very often, though."

In my last school report, my attendance was at thirty-nine percent. That's bad, apparently. Some lady had to come talk to my Dad about it.

"Is that why you suck at spelling?" Carl giggles, earning a hard kick under the table. "Hey!"

I remind him sassily, "You can't spell, neither."

He wrote 'Harly Dikson' on that Pokémon folder, after all.

"Eyes on your own work, Carl." Lori chides him. "Don't think we've forgotten about that spelling bee we had at the quarry."

Jacqui laughs, "Boy said K-A-T."

"Whatever," He huffs.

"You done there, Harley?"

"Think so." I hold up my page. Rowd. "That right?"

"Almost. It's an A instead of a W." Lori corrects me, making me roll my eyes. Whoever made this language was a real twat. "Try Duck, next."

"Sophia was better than both of us combined." Says Carl, a little sadly. "I wish she was here, already. Dad said we'd find her days ago."

"I know. We just have to be patient, honey."

"I hate being patient."

"It does put a damper on things that Shane won't be around to help search, anymore." Jacqui sighs. "One of our best men, gone."

Lori scoffs. "'Best'?"

"You know what I mean. Crazy, sure, but good with a gun. We need that."

"His heart wasn't in it, Jacqui. You know, he told me the other day that finding her was hopeless. Wanted to quit."

"Really?" She mumbles, "Wasn't that way when Harley went missing."

"He tried convincing Rick to call off the search. He wouldn't hear any of it, though. Rick won't give up. He's not like that."

She shakes her head. "Well, thank God for that."

"My Dad's lookin' for her, too." I add. "He left not long ago."

Lori smiles warmly. "And thank God for him, too."

I mirror her smile. Thank God for Rick Grimes and Daryl Dixon.

It's as I'm writing my final word, Horse, that we hear a shout from across the farm. We all jump at the suddenness of it, whirling to look in its direction. Oh, no. From what I can see, Shane's refusing to get in the car. T-Dog scolds him from the driver's seat; Rick from right in front of him, one hand on his holster, the other on Shane's shoulder. Lori lets out a small gasp when he shoves Rick into the door, his whole head red.

"If you ain't gonna do it, I will." He angers, pointing at the barn. "Them things in there are gonna kill you all, Rick!"

"What's goin' on, Mom?" Carl asks worriedly, his quiz abandoned. "What're they arguing about?"

She mutters, "I-I don't know. Just stay here with us."

"You don't sort this place out, what's the point? Kickin' me out won't solve nothin' if you ain't even gonna keep these people safe, Rick!"

"Please, Shane. This is hard enough as is!" Rick retorts, teeth bared. "This is on you! You brought this on yourself!"

"All I ever did was make sure you were safe. I'm askin' you to do the same!"

"You know I will!"

"Not without clearing out that barn, you ain't. You ain't keepin' nobody safe 'till those things are gone! You know that!"

"I am doin' my best, here!"

"Well, your 'best' is gonna get everyone killed 'fore the day's done!"

T-Dog runs around the car just in time to stop Rick from jumping him, and we watch the scene play out like a distant film, our hair standing on edge, mouths agape. They continue arguing over T-Dog's shoulders as he separates them with two strong arms, urging 'em to chill the fuck out. Others start to emerge from the house, the tents, and the RV, until everybody's standin' around the field, even Herschel and Carol.

If you won't do it, I will, is all I can hear in my head as Shane storms over to the RV and snatches up one of the rifles leaning against it.

Rick's on him like glue, hounding him as he loads it, one bullet, two, three, four, five, and cocks it, snarling, "You know what? To Hell with the Greenes, Rick. They're dumb enough to keep a bunch of killers in their barn, they had this comin'. S'like you said, you got kids here."

"This is not your decision to make!"

He throws the rifle to Glenn, who catches it on instinct, looking panicked. "Take this, man. Take it. You gonna protect you and yours?"

He stammers, glancing at Maggie, who shouts, "You do this, Shane — You hand out these guns, and my Dad—"

"What? He'll kick me out?" He laughs. "Bit too late for that, now. You see that car all packed up? I ain't got nothin' to lose, no more!"

"That's not true!" Rick grabs his shirt but gets pushed off, doing nothing but making him angrier. "You have to stop this!"

Shane loads another rifle, this time throwing it to Andrea.

"Whether I shoot that barn open right now or not won't do anything except keep ya'll safe after I'm gone. Seems pretty simple t'me."

"No. Listen, we could get kicked out, anyway. This would've all been for nothin'!"

"You're wrong. I'm the trade-off, remember. I leave, ya'll stay." He grabs a box of bullets for his pistol. "Listen, it would'a been one thing leavin' ya'll here to sit around pickin' daisies if it was safe, but now we know it ain't. I'm doin' this. I'm doin' it for Harley and Carl, since you won't."

With that, he takes all his anger down to the old barn like a storm.

When Shane makes up his mind, there ain't nothin' short of Hell itself that'll stop him from gettin' what he wants. We all know that by now. Still, Rick tries. We leave the table and bunch in with everyone else, making our way down the hill, anxious to see what'll happen, all yelling over one another, Stop, What are you thinking, Don't do this, Hey, and Herschel, who holds Beth's hand, croaks pleadingly, Stop this!

When we make it to the doors, Rick reaches out at the last second and forces Shane to face him. "Let's talk about this."

Oh, this is bad.

"Whatchu wanna talk about, huh? All you ever wanna seem to wanna do is talk. These things kill. That's the end of the matter."

"Just stop and think about this for a second."

The padlock rattles loudly. Behind those doors, there's a whole, hungry army of walkers ready to come down on us, sick or not.

"I'm not a second-guesser, man." He takes a step closer to Rick. Dale and Jacqui move forward to shield me and Carl. "You might be, but that's not me. They killed Amy. They killed Morales. They killed Otis. They're gonna kill all'a ya'll, if someone doesn't do somethin' about it right now!"

T-Dog holds up his hands. "Put the gun down, man."

Feels like Rick and Shane are about to draw on one another, when a lone walker slips from the broken panel.

"Hey. Herschel, lemme ask you something. Could a living, breathing person walk away from this?" Shane goads, raising his pistol. Before anybody can plead with him to stop, he pulls the trigger over and over again, making the rotten thing stumble around. "That's three rounds in its chest! Could someone who's alive—? Could they just walk away from that? Why is it still coming?" Bang. "That's it's heart!" Beth, squealing, Patricia crying, Rick, on the verge of tears, clutching his revolver. Bang. "That's it's lungs!" Bang. "It's throat. Why is it still coming!?"

"Shane, that's enough." Glenn bravely intervenes, not a single bullet missing from his chamber. "That's enough, man."

"Yeah." He agrees, but I know it's not for the right reasons at all. "That is enough. Enough waitin' around, scared of doing what needs done."

"No," Herschel puffs, barely able to stand. "No."

"If ya'll wanna live — If ya'll wanna survive once I'm gone — You gotta fight for it. No doubtin'. No waitin'. No second guessin'."

"Shane," Rick breathes, trying to keep everybody calm, voice brittle. "We'll do it. I'll do it. Just— Just not now, brother. Not now."

His answer is the cocking of a gun.

He knows what's about to happen. "No. No, please. This isn't the way. You can still leave without doing this."

"Can I?" He retorts, squinting. "I ain't so sure you know what it takes, man. I'm not leavin' just so you can keep puttin' everyone in danger."

"I won't. I promise you that. Please."

"See, I don't believe that. Weren't for me, this barn would stay sealed 'till someone gets killed. That's your problem, Rick. You wait to take action."

"Shane, please. Don't do this."

"You saw how close Harley was to being bitten last night."

"I know. And I promise, I will never let that happen again. Just put the gun down. There's another way to do this."

"Get behind me." Glenn mumbles shakily, herding Maggie in behind us, because he knows, too.

"There is no other, way, Rick." My heart leaps up into my mouth, making it impossible to breathe. "This is what needs to be done."

Rick only has time to let out half a cry before Shane turns, aims, and fires. The lock explodes into hundreds of tiny metallic shards, raining down like shrapnel. I huddle into Jacqui's side, wondering when exactly this whole thing went so wrong. Today? Yesterday? The moment we stepped foot on the farm? The doors whine open like two old, hurt animals, releasing the dead upon us. Then, the groaning. Then, the gunshots. A familiar cacophony. I hide my face, squeeze my eyes closed, and wait for it to be over, 'cause there's nothing else we can do.

When the last of the gunshots die out, I slowly lift my head, peeking out from behind Jacqui, who I think is trembling.

A whole barn of sick-dead people, now laying in puddles of their own blood on the ground.

My stomach drops to my feet when the last of them staggers out.

A distant gasp, "Oh, God."

Sophia.

That's Sophia.

Carol's legs give out.

Rick moves to catch her.

Sophia — Or is it just the walker, now? Is that all that's left? — creeps forward in her small, blue shoes, gazing up at the sky. The feeling drains from my body. I go numb all over. This can't be real. It just can't. Everything else, yes, but not this. She noses at the air like there's a sweet scent on the breeze that only she can smell. I notice now how even walkers can have headbands in their hair, mismatched socks, bracelets their old friends gave them, a face I recognise. I notice how she's much less different than I would have imagined. Just skinnier; slower, paler. Still just a girl.

"Sophia," Carol weeps hopelessly, "Sophia."

A hic leaves my throat, then. My friend, dead. Somehow, I'd convinced myself that this one thing, out of all of it, was impossible.

How long has she been dead for? How long have we been talking about a dead girl without even knowing it?

My Dad's out there searching for her right now.

Rick hands Carol over to Andrea, and like always, steps up to do the impossible.

But this time, he almost can't do it. He tries to raise his gun, but his arm falters, and he has to look away.

I look away, too. I look at the sun, and I think about the pond. I think about how much fun we would've had there. I think about nice things.

BANG.

Her body drops into the dirt with barely any sound.

Another one of our own, dead.

All Hell breaks loose after that. Happens so suddenly, I can't even tell which way is up.

Beth wrestles free from Jimmy's embrace, falling to her knees over one body in particular, one with blonde hair like hers. A few rush forward to try pull her away, a few start crying, but most do nothing. It's in this chaotic moment that Shane chooses to make his next move. A look of pure, unbridled determination on his face, he makes a beeline for me. Shuffling, arguing, but ultimately, a big hand in mine. Shane pulls me from the group and drags me away up the hill. People start to alert each other of what's happening before I can even figure it out myself. Rick runs after us, suddenly, and then Glenn, too. Then, Lori, Andrea, everyone else. We're through the gate, now, halfway across the field and nearing the car.

Wracked with sobs, I try to tug my hand out of his, shuddering hotly, "Wh—? What's goin' on? What're you doin'?!"

His grip is far too strong to escape. He doesn't answer me, doesn't even spare me a glance.

"Shane!" Rick screams, racing up the path. I can't quite tell if he's enraged or terrified. "Stop!"

We reach the car. He grabs me up off the ground, precise as a machine, and shoves me into the backseat.

"Get in the car, Harley."

I don't wanna get in the car. More than anything, I do not wanna get in the car.

He tries setting me down, but I kick, and push, and squeal against him, even beat on him, scratch his arms, anything but get in the car, but nothing stops him from pinning me to the seat. He growls at me to, Stop it, ripping the seatbelt down and over me. He locks me in with a, click.

"No!" I grunt, grabbing for the buckle, but by the time I'm free, the door is already slamming shut. It don't budge when I yank on it. "Shane!"

He rounds the car, locking the second door, and the third. He steals the map from the hood and throws himself in the driver's seat, shoving the key straight into the ignition. The engine comes to life as I climb up to the window. Rick and Glenn are running faster than I've ever seen them run, but still so far away, screaming on the top of their lungs for someone to Stop the car!

"Shane, what's goin' on?" I breathe, petrified, trying to brute force the door open again. "What're you doin'? Let me out!"

He ignores me and orders, "Put your seatbelt back on."

"No!" God damn it! Why won't this door open?! "Let me out!"

Locked in a car, engine on. This can only mean one thing.

He's leaving, and he's taking me with him.

"Put your seatbelt on, Harley!" He shouts, twisting to grab my arm, before something over my shoulder makes his eyes go wide. "Shit! Get down!"

He manages to shove my head into my lap just in time for the entire back windshield shatter all over us.

As I clutch my head, covered in hundreds of little pieces of glass that bite into my skin, Rick screams, "Don't you dare drive away, Shane!"

He must've shot the window.

"Shit," He panics, checking if I'm alright. He glances at the bullet hole in the dash before another one splits the air and hits the radio. He grips the wheel. He steps on the gas. The tyres squeal. He makes a break for the gate, driving over rocks and twigs and even someone's camping chair, which snaps under the tyres and goes flying out behind us. I scramble to look out the broken window. Rick and Glenn, who seemed like they were moving fast as the wind, are now shrinking smaller by the second. I feel my stomach shrink with 'em. They can't outrun a car. I know that, and so do they, but they don't stop for nothin', anyway. They even try shooting the tyres, but they're too difficult to hit like this.

Even after Glenn doubles over, Rick keeps on sprinting after us down the long driveway, drenched in sweat.

But even he has limits. Watching Rick Grimes succumb to exhaustion is like watching the sun stop shining, and all hope leaves me in an instant.

"God damn it!" He cries out, shrinking, shrinking, shrinking, until he's just a little speck of beige in the distance.

"No," I murmur under my breath, realizing the horror of what's just happened. Just like that, everything's been turned upside down. I swear I was standing in front of the barn just a minute ago. I sink down onto the seat, utterly stunned. With each moment that passes, the distance between us and the farm grows larger, and the chances of them finding us grows smaller. Already, I'm trying to imagine all the ways this could end, but none of them are good. I glimpse Shane's paled face in the rear-view mirror. His knuckles are white around the steering wheel. His brow, wet.

I ain't up for losin' another little girl while I'm at it. 'Specially not mine.

What do I do? What can I possibly do?

"Shane," My voice shakes, thin as paper. I don't know what I'm trying to say.

"I know." He mutters, just as shell-shocked as I am, gripping the wheel tighter. "I know. I'm... I'm gonna make this work."

Make this work? Make what work? Are we just going to keep driving until we're lost? Is that it?

He keeps on muttering, "I'm gonna make this work."

Somehow, I think that's been his mantra since the beginning.

Highway 86, Reads the big, green sign on the side of the road, 5 Miles Ahead.

Besides me on the seat, my backpack sits on top of his. 

Oh.

"I'm gonna make this work."

That's where it went.

Sometime after the sun's moved halfway across the sky, Shane pulls onto the side of the road.

As he brings the car to a stop, I try not to let myself panic. I need to steel myself. I remember. Getting outta this — getting back to everyone — means I gotta be smart. I reckon we're about a day's walk from the farm, by now. I can't make that. Not alone. I don't even know where we are, what roads to take, how to get back. A map, then. I'll need a map. Shane's got one. It's laying out across the passenger seat. Maybe I could—

"I know what you're thinking." He suddenly speaks up, tone flat. He's been looking at me in the mirror, I realize. "I can't let you do it."

I try not to let my fear show on my face.

"You wanna go back." He tells me simply. "I'm not an idiot, Harley. Crazy, accordin' to Rick and all the rest of 'em... But not an idiot."

I know that. I think that's why I feel so scared right now.

I ask him, "What are we doin' here, Shane?"

"Startin' over."

"But I don't wanna start over. I want..."

I want my Dad.

He takes a minute to calm himself down, gazing out the window, at the trees. Eventually, he looks at me, again.

"You'll learn to get over it." He says. "There's a lot we can both learn to get over. But you're safer out here, with me. It's always been that way."

"What happened back there?" The barn, Sophia... "Were you always gonna do that? Were you always gonna—?"

"I was." He admits. "Since I walked into that room at the CDC, I've always known what I was gonna do. Just... Happened the wrong way, I s'pose."

I shake my head. "You ain't gonna get away with this."

"Harley," He chuckles, shrugging. "Look around. I've already 'gotten away with it'. It's already done. It's just us, now."

It's just us, now.

I look out the window. Trees, trees, and more trees, and a thin road that stretches for miles. Silence. And nobody but us.

He sees the defeat wash over me and turns to get out. "I need to clean out the glass."

He comes around to my door and helps me climb out. My feet hit the leafy ground. The breeze skirts across my skin. It would be so easy to run. But where am I meant to go? He's right. I'm safe with him. Somehow, the open air and the endless forest makes me feel more trapped than ever.

I sit on a nearby log, staring at a little beetle crawling across my boot, as he uses an old shirt to sweep out the broken glass.

Once he's done, he whistles for me. "C'mon, sweetheart. We gotta move."

We��gotta move, 'cause they'll be looking for us. I let that thought calm me. It's all I have.

I get back in the car and he closes the door behind me.

Dad's gonna raise Hell when he gets back.

Author's Note.

Daryl and Harley have made up. It was time for some more drama. 😼

Don't worry, THIS IS TEMPORARY! Trust me, Daryl's not going to let this slide.

Sorry about Sophia... I know there were some of you who didn't want me to kill her off. I would've loved for her and the other kids to live long lives together, but I just couldn't do it.

Also, when I was writing the first scene, all I could think about was that episode where Daryl just walks up to Leah's cabin and throws a dead animal on her doorstep 😭 No decorum

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this chapter :)

Again, shout out to Cora_Line99 :)

[imaginesofstardewvalley]

could you do a really fluffy piece between a male farmer and Alex, where the latter finally comes to terms with and confesses his feelings for the former. any location or general scenario would be cool :3 (also it'd be great if the feelings were reciprocated, so not one sided pls) x

Feelings (Alex X Male!Farmer)

The sunset in the distance shined brilliantly over my farm, my recent hard work and nearly blinding me. A sudden voice rung out, tearing my gaze away from the natural sight, Alex walked over towards me while waving, I waved back “hey! Come sit next to me” I patted on the porch of my house, he obliged and sat crossed legged by my side. He grinned “thanks for inviting me” I picked up a can of a drink from the cooler next to me, earlier in the day when I had a break I picked up a bunch of stuff I knew he liked, he told me about the drink once and it’s stuck in my mind ever since. I told him “it’s no problem” I paused as I held out the drink to him “here” if it could be possible, the giddy smile on his face became bigger. I noticed a faint blush on his cheeks as he accepted the drink “this is my favourite!” he opened the can and took a sip as I told him “yeah, you told me so I thought I’d get some” he didn’t meet my gaze as he seemed to look anywhere else “wow I can’t believe you remembered” to tease him I joked “I’m not a goldfish, you know”

I looked back over to the farm and his gaze followed, the beautiful blues and oranges blended together creating a lovely scene. Alex spoke up “so how was your day?” I replied quickly “busy. Since the season changed today I had to get the crops, plant em and then water them. While also doing my other chores” without missing a beat he asked “did you take a break?” I shrugged and drunk some of the drink “yeah, that's when I got these snacks” I gestured to the cooler next to my thigh I looked over to him but he was already looking at me with a dejected face “man, you spent your break buying stuff for me? You should relax more often” I shook my head and turned away from him “Alex. I promise you I’m fine I know when I’m too exhausted” I paused for a second, he's not aware how much I wanted to do this. I then added “plus what am I doing now?” He tried to hide his smile by turning away from me but I saw it, I laughed and put my hand on his shoulder “I’m perfectly fine, ok?” He looked at my hand that rested on his firm shoulder, he seemed at a loss for words as he continued to stare. Worried I took my hand back and he finally spoke “yeah I know...just want to make sure. You’re always working hard” I smiled, knowing he cares for me is wonderful, he's always checking up on me and making sure I'm ok, which makes me feel really loved but I'm sure on his side it's completely a platonic thing.

"Have you ever been in love with a man?"

Well I've had similar conversations with straight men before but they've usually never phrased it that way. Genuinely shocked by the sudden question I struggle to find the words before I bluntly spit out "yes" he doesn't say anything, his facial expression remains the same, I get the hint that he's waiting for me to explain further "when I still lived in the city I had a couple of boyfriends, one was serious the other not so much" he nodded and looked to the sunset and asked me "were they out?" he turned back and I nodded. He gulped and he started pulling on each of his individual fingers, is he nervous? "I can't think of anyway to ask this subtley so I'm just gonna be straight" we both laughed under our breath at the irony of the subject mattter and that comment, he sighed before coming out with "would you date someone who isn't out?" I took a sip of my drink and thought about it, relationships where one person is out and the other isn't can get messy, quickly. On the other hand, if there was something potentially there? Why ignore it? I put the can down "if I really liked the person and I thought it could go somewhere, then yes. I think so" the implication if what he was asking me hit me all at once

Why is he asking this?

Does he think he's gay?

Is there someone in town he wants to date is out? Who is that?

Is it me?

I finally met his eyes after having an internal debate with myself, if theres a chance he likes me back, I need to know. "Alex, why are you asking this?" he resumed to playing with his hands "because I think I like you, and I mean like like you" once he started talking, he didn't stop "like the way you're on my mind constantly and the way I think you look handsome isn't the way I think about my friends. It's different, I've never felt this way about a woman before and I have tried but it didn't work because obviously you can't force yourself to like someone you don't like" I'm scared he isn't breathing with how fast he's talking "but I don't want to admit I like you because I'm not sure and I don't want to somehow lead you on but I'm also not out and I'm scared to be out-" I interuppted him "Alex I think you just admitted it" he took a breath in "but I really like you and I'm sorry if you don't like me back and I have made things awkward between us" I shook my head "you haven't, not at all" I placed my hand on his, in hopes to calm him down "in fact, I like you back and I was trying to ignore that" I laughed and gestured to the cooler of his favourite snacks "clearly not doing a good job of it. But I thought I was being silly for liking a straight guy" he smiled softly "so we both like each other then?" I giggled "that's what I gathered" he sighed softly and his gaze stayed focused on my face, his eyes darting to each of my features, lingering as if he is trying to memorise them. Almost instinctively we both inched closer together, is this what I think it is?

"Alex?"

"Yes?"

"Can I kiss you?"

"Yes"

I placed my hand on his knee and moved my head closer to his, tilting as our lips tocuhed. They were soft, the kiss moved slowly as I felt his hand touch my cheek then as quickly as it happened it ended. He spoke under his breath "I've been waiting for this moment" so have I so I didn't hesitate, I went back in and the kiss was harder as his lips parted, making the kiss more passionate than before.

"MOO"

I tore away from him to see a cow standing outside my house "oh god I didn't close the gate" he laughed "come, I'll help you" we both stood up and made our way to the barn.

[dovesnowo]

This Flower Made Me Think Of You

Pairings: Eren x Historia one-shot

Summary: Eren gives Historia flower from Marley. What they don’t know is that the pollen increases one’s sexual desire.

Word Count: 3.6k

Warning: Sexual Themes

My story can be found at ao3 and wattpad under the same pseudo. :)    

Historia was in heat, and it wasn’t because of the weather. Yes, it’s the summer, and it’s hot, but after a while, she got used to it. However, Historia has developed a burning sensation ever since last week. Now that she thinks about it, it didn’t start until Eren came. Last week, Eren came to the farm and brought a peculiar-looking bunch of flowers in a jar.

Historia looks at the blue flower with a yellow-pinkish center in wonder. "You said this is from Marley? What is it?"

Eren scratches the back of his neck. "Well, I don’t know exactly what. It was a ship we took in, and it looked like it had all sorts of flowers. "When I saw those, I thought of you."

She looks up to Eren, and they briefly hold eye contact before she looks down, to hide her blush. "Thank you, Eren. These are lovely."

Eren: "One of the Marleyeans was telling me that it helps one’s vitality, but you can’t consume it."

Historia: "Oh? I wouldn’t want flower soup. I’ll put them in a vase."

He smiles. "Good. I’ll be back next week to make sure you haven’t killed them off."

Once Eren left, Historia put the flowers in a vase in her room. They had an enticing aroma. When she wasn’t smelling the flowers, a burning sensation slowly took root in the pit of her stomach. The more days passed, the more she sniffed them, and now, after a week, she’s lying flat on her back on her bed.

Historia closed her eyes for a few minutes to try and will the burning sensation she was feeling away, but to no avail. 

Historia huffs discontentedly and places her hand on her stomach. Something compelled her to slowly move her hands down to her waistline, under her skirt, and dip her fingers in her underwear. Once her fingers touched her cilt, she breathed deeply. That was it. She felt her burning sensation dissipate as she rubbed her cilt and a moan slipped from her when she inserted a finger inside herself. It was too good, and she inserted two more fingers. She quietly moaned again, but this time for Eren. Eren? Historia closed her eyes and began to imagine him in her room, but her eyes snapped open when she heard loud knocks coming from downstairs. She paused her movements.

She could hear the door being opened and her maid talking with a deep voice in response to it. Historia withdraws her fingers and sits up in time to hear a knock at her door.

Maid: "Your Majesty, Mr. Eren Yeager wishes to see you."

Panic quickly fills the queen’s mind. "Yes, um, give me a moment, and I shall go down."

Maid: "Are you okay, my lady?"

Historia: "Yes, thank you, Cecelia." She rushes to her bathroom, which is connected to her bedroom, and washes her hands. She was about to wipe the fluids that had accumulated in her lower regions when she heard another knock at her door."Yes, Cecelia?"

"It’s me."

Historia’s heartbeat quickened from hearing the familiar sound belonging to her old cadet buddy and the man she was just envisioning as she was masturbating. "I’ll be out in a moment!" She quickly wipes her bottom and straightens her clothes out. She rushes and opens the door. "Eren! Fancy seeing you here!"

Eren looked silently at Historia for a moment until he spoke. "I told you I'd be back in a week."

Historia: "Silly me! The time just flew by so fast!"

Eren chose to ignore Historia’s strange demeanor. "Could I come in? Your maid told me that you have the flowers in here."

Historia opens the door wider. "Yes, of course!" She closes the door after Eren and ushers him to the flowers. 

The flower vase sat on a small table with two chairs. The two sat in the chairs that were facing each other.

Eren lightly touches a flower petal. "Looks like you’ve been taking care of it well."

Historia: "It’s actually easy to manage!"

Eren leans in and deeply inhales the scent. Historia couldn’t help but stare at him as he closed his eyes to inhale. Before she knew it, her body subconsciously moved to the flower to smell it as well. She closed her eyes and inhaled. The blonde slowly opened her eyes and was surprised to see the dark haired man already staring at her. 

Historia: "How does it smell?"

Eren: "It smells really good."

Historia notices Eren didn’t pull back, and neither did she. They were so close to each other, and the only thing separating them were the flowers. There was a look in Eren’s eyes that reignited the flames in her belly. She quickly pulls back, and he does the same.

Historia straightens her posture. "How’s the Titan training?"

Eren: "I can transform into my Titan form about three times in a row now."

Historia: "Wow, that’s amazing. The training is paying off."

Eren nods his head. "How are you? Is the royalty life getting boring yet?"

Historia: "Yet? I think it’s always been bo-UGH!" She falls out of her chair and doubles over in pain.

Eren gets up and rushes to Historia. "Are you alright, Historia?" He grabs her shoulder; which Historia made her feel sensitive?

Historia swats him away and clears her throat. "I'm sorry, Eren; uh, well, I have been feeling ill for quite awhile."

Eren touches her forehead. "Historia, you’re burning up!"

She slaps his hand away. "Eren, please don’t touch me."

Eren’s confusion only grew. "You’re sick, Historia. How long have you been sick?”

Historia: "I-I don’t know." She subconsciously starts rubbing her legs together. "I think something is going on, I-I feel so hot."

Eren gets up. "I’ll get a doctor."

Historia grabs his arm. "No, wait!" She pulls back her hand quickly. "I…" The pain within Historia was starting to become unbearable. No words came out of her mouth as she felt her lungs get tighter and tighter. Out of an instinctive impulse, she opens her legs. She places her hand on her cilt and begins rubbing it.The pain immediately dissipates. She closes her eyes and moans, forgetting that Eren is kneeling by her side.

Eren quietly watches in surprise as Historia masturbates in front of him. ‘Why is she doing this?’ ‘Is this a seduction tactic?’ ‘Why would she randomly act this way?’ ‘Is it the flower?’ He looks over at the flower.

Ever since Eren came into Historia’s room, he has been smacked with a wave of a strange aura. When he sniffed the flowers, the peculiar feeling increased, as did the length in his groin. He could feel himself getting hard watching Historia. He wanted her to stop but couldn’t bring himself to tell her. Instead, he puts his hands in his pants and encloses them around his cock.

Historia opens her eyes when she hears a groan coming from her side. A pang of guilt and shame immediately hits her when she realizes Eren is still in the room. ‘Maybe I imagined him showing up here.’ She stops and glances at him. He was stroking himself and staring at her.

Eren breathes out. "Don’t stop, keep going." 

Historia maintained their eye contact as she inserted a finger in her vagina. They silently jerked themselves off in front of each other, but it wasn’t enough. Historia’s eyes traveled to Eren’s cock and slowly back to his eyes.

Eren blurts out. "The flowers. This is because-"

Historia: "I don’t care." As much as she didn’t want to, she withdrew her fingers and crawled to Eren. She grabs his dick and starts tugging on it. His eyes rolled to the back of his head.

Historia removes her hands and moves atop Eren’s legs, leaning in. They breathe deeply in each other’s proximity, nuzzling each other’s noses until Eren captures her lips. She opens her mouth to taste the velvety nature of Eren’s tongue. Historia reaches her hand back down, but Eren stops her. She breaks the kiss and gasps for air. She goes back in, but he stops her.

Eren: "Sorry, I didn’t mean to..."

Rather than responding, Historia looks Eren right in the eyes and slowly rolls her hips down onto his cock. He curses under his breath, and he latches on to her neck to suckle on it.

"Eren, you can’t kiss me there or someone will know."

"Let them know." He licks and bites at her pulse.

She rolls her eyes at his impulsive words. To solve this little conundrum, she quickly unbuttons her shirt and pulls Eren to her chest. "Do it here instead." He silently complies and massages her clothed breasts. He moves his hands to her bra clasp, but Historia unhooks it before he could try. He then moves his onslaught to her nipples, making her cry out loud. 

"You’re so loud." He said it between kisses.

Historia rolls her hips so she can feel his member. He groans in response. "Shut up and take your clothes off." 

Eren begins unbuttoning his shirt while Historia works on his pants. He gets stripped down to his underwear, and he works on taking off her skirt but can’t since Historia kept lifting his head up to kiss her despite the bumping of their noses and clashing against each other’s teeth.

Eventually Eren was naked and Historia was down to her panties. As they grinded against each other, Eren could feel Historia’s wetness seep through her underwear onto his cock. He moves his hands to her waistband, and before he could pull it down, her hand catches his.

Historia: "Are you sure?"

Eren asks. "Do you want to stop?"

Historia: "I feel like if we stop now, it'll drive me crazy, but we have to."

Eren picks Historia up from the floor and places her on her bed. He kisses her from her shoulders to her breasts. "You’re already driving me crazy; I don’t think I could stop right now if I wanted to."

Historia pants. "I’m the queen. I’m supposed to save myself for the man who will be my husband and the father of my future children."

Eren snorts. "I wouldn’t take you for someone who cares about saving their virginity."

Historia: "Yes, bu-"

He grinds his hips into her. "The guy won’t care whether it’s your first, second, or forty-first time. He’s fucking the queen. Why should you worry?"

She looks into his eyes. They were mostly filled with lust and a hint of jealousy. Knowing this gave her some comfort.

He slowly removes her panties. "What if I got you pregnant?"

Historia tries to think in her haze of lust. "You can't because I'm supposed to."

Eren inserted the tip of his dick inside Historia, enlisting a moan from Historia.

"No one will know."

"Wh-why would you want to get me pregnant?"

Rather than answering, Eren inserts himself deeper but pulls out midway. He continues this slow-breaking process as Historia takes her nails from his chest to the base of his neck.

She attacks his lips and whines.

Eren groans and inserts his entire cocks into the confines of Historia. He examines the space between their hips and her expression, which is contorted with discomfort. He breathes deeply at this new, foreign feeling.

Historia still felt the discomfort, but her lust was too overwhelming for her to care. 

He leans down to her ear to whisper. "You feel so good, fuck."

Historia: "I’m the queen."

Eren: "Yeah?"

Historia: "Yeah, that means don’t hold back."

Eren slowly pulls out halfway once more."Since you don’t want me to hold back, aren’t you worried a lowly soldier like me could get you pregnant?" He rubbed her cilt before harshly snapping his hips back in Historia, and she suppressed a moan.

"Stop talking about getting me pregnant. We’re only doing this once. That’s it."

"Only once?" He nibbles on her ear and growls. "Don’t you know I can’t be satisfied with doing it one time?" He starts thrusting at a faster pace. 

Historia: "That’s not my problem, Mr. Eren Yeager."

"It is when I fuck you so silly. You’re gonna beg me to do it again. After tonight, no one else will be enough. He licks her neck. "No one will be enough to please you." He props her up against her pillows to hit from another angle.

Historia arches her back and hooks a leg around his waist. The feeling of electricity between them was increasing the feeling of Eren inside her. She moans his name and curses the effects he has on her.

Eren leans down and hungrily captures Historia’s lips to suppress his groans. He never expected how good sex could be, and of all people, he had the chance to do it with Historia. It was something he secretly wanted yet never thought he would have.

Historia pushed herself up against the bed frame, unconcerned about how loud their sounds of pleasure would make the bed. She frowned when she noticed Eren was slowing his movements down until they were at a complete stop. Then he withdrew his cock and stared at her. She opened her mouth to protest, but he beat her to it.

Eren: "Tell me what you want?"

Historia: "Eren! Just fuck me!"

Eren: "Is that it?"

The pain in Historia’s abdomen was quickly coming back. "This is not the time to fool around, Ere--"

Eren leaned down so that they were face-to-face. "What do you truly want, Historia?"

"Eren!"

Eren wouldn't budge from his resolve. 

Historia closed her eyes in contemplation and opened them with a definite answer. "I want you cum inside me. I want you to cum inside me so many times tonight that I think I might get pregnant, daddy."

Eren freezes at Historia’s new pet name that she just gave him. She thinks about apologizing to him until he leans down and whispers in her ear. "You want a daddy so bad? I’ll give it to you all night." He groans as she tugs on his cock.

She pumps him steadily. "I do want it all night."

He chuckles. "Look at you, so wet for my cock, aren’t you?"

"Yes." She guides him to her entrance, but he grabs her wrist, restricting her from moving.

"Want it?"

"Yes."

"Beg for it."

She gives him puppy-dog eyes, but he shakes his head. "Tell me."

"Daddy, please, I want your cock so bad! Please fill me up."

He quickly sinks all the way down into her, and she chokes up a surprised gasp. He groans. "I’m gonna fill you up so bad, you’re gonna get pregnant."

She moans. "We shouldn’t."

He thrusts roughly. "I don’t care. Don’t act like you do either. I bet you want me to do that. Huh? You want little Yeagers?"

She smiles. "They’ll be little Reiss babies too."

He snaps his hips into hers. "The way I’m coming inside you, you won’t even know. Eren attaches his mouth to her nipple to bite and then darts his tongue out to lap around and on her nipple. Historia wraps her arms around his head to keep his mouth near her chest. He moves to the other breast to repeat the same action.

She moans lightly. "Eren."

He stops.

Historia opens her eyes and notices he’s glaring at her. "Wh-why did you stop?"

"If you want me so badly, be a good girl and call me daddy accordingly."

She bites her lips and blushes at his dirty talk. When did he become so vulgar? Well, she initiated the dirty talk first, but still. His dirty talking rubbed off on her, and now he seems to have taken a liking to the term ‘daddy’. She clears her throat. "Sorry, daddy."

"Good girl. You wanna know how I reward good girls?"

She nods her head. "Yes, I do."

He smirks and leans down to capture her lips. He bites at her lower lips and starts moving his hips. Once she whimpered in his mouth, he darted out his tongue to meet hers. His thrusts began to pick up tempo, and she arched her back in response. 

She meets his thrusts. "Harder, go harder, daddy."

Eren growls out. "Okay baby." He spreads her legs wider and goes in and out of her swiftly. Historia grips the sheets and cries out. "Oh god, keep going!"

He continues at his pace, and she starts gripping his hair. Then she rubs her hands up and down his chest. 

"Historia, bite me." She looks at him to make sure he’s sure. When she knows he is, she pushes herself up to grab at his neck. She kissed it sweetly and then sunk her teeth softly into him. His hips jerk. "Fu-fuck." Eren begins jackhammering into Historia at an erratic rate. She cried into his neck while she was still bruising it.

They both moan uncontrollably. Historia pants: "Daddy, oh my god, I’m coming!" She arches her back as her walls clench around his cock. Historia disintegrates into pleasures, causing Eren to groan her name until his knees buckled and he threw in one final thrust to empty himself inside of her.He remains inside her as they lie panting heavily. Once his hips stop moving from the aftershocks, he withdraws from her and crashes at her side.

She pants out. "You’re quite skilled at this, Mr. Yeager."

Eren laughs. "You’re not too bad yourself."

Historia giggles.

Eren: "I think the flower has something to do with this."

Historia turns onto her side to face Eren. "Oh?"

Eren: "Yeah, Hange’s research team found one of the flowers from Marley causes an immeasurable amount of anger. Another one causes severe depression. We were foolish to trust their words so easily. I was worried about whether the flowers I gave you were normal or harmful.

Historia: "And what do you think now?"

Eren: "I think it causes already established feelings to intensify. When I came into the room, it felt... off. I was even more drawn to you after smelling the flowers. I could tell in your eyes that you felt the same.

Historia: "Maybe it’s because I think I love you." Her eyes widened and her mouth shut immediately once those words slipped out. There is a brief moment of silence between the two until she hears him say.

"Do you mean it?"

If Historia hadn’t seen his lips move, she would’ve sworn that he didn’t say anything at all. She nods her head earnestly in response to his question. "If what you said is true about the flowers, it only amplified my love for you more."

Eren stayed silent for a moment until he breathed out. "I love you too."

Historia felt her thoughts go haywire when Eren turned to look at her, and she saw a look that she could only describe as one of great affection. She kisses his lips and smiles.

They lie staring into each other's eyes. Historia softly caresses his face while he does the same for her hip.

Eren pauses his movements and whispers. "I haven't done this before, and after this, I don’t think I will again." A look of somberness filled his expression.

Historia is quickly reminded of Eren’s impending fatal destiny. She suddenly gets up and puts on a robe. She rushes out of her bedroom for what seemed like an hour to Eren.

"Historia?" He is met with silence. He sits up in concern until the door opens to reveal Historia with two glasses of water. She gave him one while she drank hers.

"His-"

"I sent everyone home for the night. We’re going to need to stay hydrated."

"Stay hydrated?"

"Did you just think that I'd be satisfied with just one round? Drink."

Eren silently follows her command. When he stops and puts it on the table, Historia crawls back onto the bed. Eren flips her until she is on all fours. From there, he inserts his cock to easily stuff her. She breathed deeply. "This is a new position."

He moved his hips steadily. "First time for everything, right?"

"Do you need any more rest?"

"I recover quickly. You’re going to be so well fucked by the morning."

Historia shudders at Eren’s word and doesn’t hold back her screams for the rest of the night. By morning, Eren was kissing Historia awake. She has bruises all over and a dull pain between her thighs from last night.

With a raspy voice, she pushes Eren away. "I’m tired. No more."

Eren chuckles. "I'm beat myself. Can’t I just kiss you?"

"You said that the last time we did it."

"Point taken." He pulls back and caresses her cheek. "How are you feeling?"

"I lost my voice."

"You were being loud."

She playfully hits his chest. "You were too."

"You love it when I am."

She pecked his cheek.

"Do you want some breakfast?"

She plants her face in the pillow. "I need more rest. God, I’m never doing that many rounds in a night again." She laughs as much as Eren does.

"I’ll cook, and I’ll serve you breakfast in bed."

She turns her head toward him. "Really? You’re so sweet, Eren. I should probably head down there and tell you where things are, but since you'll be here more often, you should learn by yourself."

Eren's eyes widen, and he quickly turns around to cover them up.You're right, I’ll learn." He rubs her back and gets up to leave for the kitchen. 

Historia felt the sense of euphoria that came with being with Eren as one. She touched her stomach, and a ping of pain hit her. Maybe she should throw out the flowers because, despite being tired, she wanted more of him.

[duhdumb89]

A Forbidden Happiness | Chapter 13

"His Majesty gave us the honor of caring for Jiang gui ren, and we failed so soon," cried Yao gonggong, "I deserve to die!"

He wailed in misery, and his compatriots followed suit, slapping their faces and pounding their chests. Jiang gui ren's maids congregated at Xiang gui ren's feet, wailing in miserable unison. Partly because of their guilt and partly because of pain in their hands, which were covered in brilliant red rashes. 

Their mistress was sequestered in the bedroom, asleep as the doctors from the Imperial Hospital worked on her throughout the night. Hours ago, The Emperor's eunuchs returned Jiang gui ren to her rooms. Xiang gui ren wouldn't have known a thing about it if she hadn't heard the other woman moaning and bellowing in pain. The moment that dawn broke, Xiang gui ren rushed over. 

Xiang gui ren clicked her tongue, "Aish. It's not your fault the slaves here are slackers. They should've known better than to use buckets that held poison ivy for the milk in jiejie's bath. Dry your tears, Yao gonggong and get up. Listen to the Imperial doctors and take care of those hands or you'll be of no use to your mistress,"

Old as they were, Jiayi and Molan had to help them to their feet.

"Xiang gui ren is too kind," said a squat woman called Huan momo.

Jiayi watched as the elder servants trickle into Jiang gui ren's bedroom, buzzing with anticipation. Now that other servants were gone, she could tell her mistress about the gift she gave Jiang gui ren. 

Yesterday evening, Yao gonggong and Cui momo had asked if Xiang gui ren could spare one or two servants to haul a few buckets of goat milk for Jiang gui ren's bathwater. Jiayi volunteered, a seed of a plan taking root in her brain. The hard labor camp and the barn weren't far apart. On the road between the two were stubborn patches of poison ivy. Digging out the climbing vines with your bare hands was a common punishment in the hard labor camp. The blistering, burning rash would last weeks if you weren't allowed to go to the Imperial Hospital for treatment. 

Jiayi ripped bunches of leaves with a cloth-covered hand and tied them into a cheesecloth pouch. When all the buckets had been brought to Jiang gui ren's room, she again volunteered to empty the buckets into the tub while the momos warmed the water for the bath. Jiayi dunked the cheesecloth of poison ivy into each bucket before pouring them out. Afraid it wouldn't do much, she let the pouch soak in the tub until Cui momo returned with the hot water, which again she offered to empty. When all was said and done, Jiayi fished out the floating pouch and brought all the buckets and the evidence back to the farm and disposed of the evidence. 

It was a foolish thing to do, but Jaiyi couldn't help herself. His Majesty had obviously learned the truth about Jiang gui ren and what she'd done, and the only thing he did to punish her was take away her maids. Jiayi knew her life was cheap, but what of Xiang gui ren? Of First and Second Princess? Of The Empress? How could he let Jiang gui ren get away with it?

Even if Jiayi risked her life, it was worth it. It was worth it to grasp vengeance–something a maid like her never had the right to touch. The thought of how happy Xiang gui ren would be comforted her rabbiting heart as she did the deed. 

Unfortunately, Xiang gui ren looked far from happy. The sight of Jiang gui ren had caused her to almost faint. She staggered into the receiving room, with Jiayi and Molan as the only things keeping her upright. She called out the servants and asked them shakily what had happened to their mistress.

Now, Xiang gui ren was slumped over in a chair; her head cradled in her hand.

"My goodness," she muttered, "My goodness..."

"Mistress, are you alright?" Jiayi asked, her tongue numb and heavy in her mouth.

"How can I be alright?" Xiang gui ren replied, "Didn't you see her?"

"I think her outsides match her insides now. You shouldn't waste your time feeling sorry for her, mistress," said Molan.

Jiayi agreed. A poisonous woman like Jiang gui ren suited a body swollen with sickness and riddled with itching blemishes. 

"I'm feeling sorry for myself," snapped Xiang gui ren, "Do you know how this looks?"

Jiayi froze and licked her lips, "How what looks?"

"Jiang gui ren suddenly comes down with this strange affliction after I was framed for such a large crime? Not only does it look like I've taken revenge, but it looks like I've done so in the face of His Majesty! If she becomes dead or worse, it would only take one smart mouth to make me the culprit," 

Molan gasped, "Do you think Jiang gui ren did this to herself?"

Xiang gui ren angrily flapped her fan, "Of  course not. She would never let His Majesty see her in such a state even if it meant spiting me. No, this was just bad luck," 

Jiayi's stomach roiled with worry. She hadn't thought about that. All she wanted to was get justice for herself after being wronged. She didn't know it would go so far.

"Don't worry, mistress," said Jiayi, her voice quiet, "It'll be alright,"

"Cui momo," Xiang gui ren called.

The maid presented herself.

"Look after Jiang gui ren well. If there are any changes, inform Her Highness at once,"

Cui momo nodded, "I'll run and fetch His Majesty himself if need be!"

Xiang gui ren gave a strained smile, "Very good,"

The day was bright and sunny. If Jiayi's mood was slightly dampened by Xiang gui ren's worries, then it darkened entirely by the sight of Susu entering the courtyard. The maid's clothes were filthy, while her face was crusted with rust colored splotches of old blood. Her greasy hair was tied in a messy braid and by the way she limped across the courtyard, her time in The Office of Careful Punishment was obviously not easy. 

Everyone had heard that all of Jiang gui ren's former servants were granted death, so how could her partner in crime be back already?

Xiang gui ren didn't look happy at the sight of the treacherous maid either.

"Is that Susu?" Asked Molan, "I thought His Majesty burned her coffin already. Should we be calling a shaman?"

"This lowly servant wishes Xiang gui ren peace," said Susu, lowering her battered body to the ground.

"Back already?" Asked Xiang gui ren.

Susu nodded, "His Majesty said that without me Jiang gui ren may not recover from the shock of her sickness so he allowed me to return," 

Xiang gui ren smiled, "Poor thing. You came all the way here for nothing. Cui momo and Huan momo are taking good care of jiejie. There's no need for you. Bolin can take you back to The Office of Careful Punishment,"

Susu gaped up at Xiang gui ren before clinging to the concubine's skirts. 

"Xiang gui ren, have mercy on me please!" she said as Bolin tried to tear her hands away,  "It was Haoyu and the others who plotted against you! My mistress and I were ignorant of it all!"

"Ping'er," Xiang gui ren said, "What do you think?"

It almost made Jiayi laugh at the way Susu's face fell. Cleary, Susu hadn't forgotten the way she had treated Ping'er many months before.

"Mistress, His Majesty did his very best to rid your palace of this sort of vermin," said Ping'er, "Why invite one back to stay?"

Laughing, Xiang gui ren wrenched her skirts away from Susu, "I didn't know you could be so mean, Little Cutie. No matter. If His Majesty is fond of rats, how could I dare question him?"

----

Jiayi couldn't sleep. 

Actually, that wasn't true. 

Jiayi wouldn't sleep. When her eyes finally closed, and she began to drift away, there was no blissful silence, no comforting darkness. There were only terrible fantasies of what Su gonggong would do when he got his hands on her for good. 

As a maid, sleepless nights were second nature to her but Jiayi hadn't slept soundly for weeks.  Pie'er had mentioned that her skin had transformed into a sickly yellowish gray. There was a constant buzzing in the back of Jiayi's head, and her feet and hands tended to go numb. She would doze off if she sat down too long or stood still in one place. Shadows constantly crept at the corners of her eyes. Even the princesses had noticed, claiming she was slow and her lines shaky. 

Xiang gui ren became more irritable the longer Jiang gui ren was bed bound. The rash had cleared somewhat, but The Emperor had banned her from serving in bed for three months so she could recover fully. More rumors began to swirl concerning Jiang gui ren's fate and Xiang gui ren's hand in it all.  Her mistress had gone to bed miffed that Jiayi misplaced her favorite trinket. If Jiayi ruined her sleep because of her night terrors, Xiang gui ren might punish her for the first time. When Jiayi felt the heavy hand of sleep dragging her down, while she was curled up at the foot of Xiang gui ren's bed, she stumbled to her feet.

A walk would help. It usually did. The closer Jiayi was to exhaustion, the quieter her sleep would be. If she took longer than usual, it would be fine. Molan was curled up on the floor next to Xiang gui ren's bed. Jiayi grabbed a lantern and stepped outside.

At this time of night, The Forbidden City was silent. There was no moonlight or wind to rustle the bushes and trees. Only stillness and peace. It made Jiayi jealous. She wanted nothing more than to grab the night and drown it in. She didn't know how much longer she could continue like this.

So when a hand darted out of the shadows and grabbed her, Jiayi blamed the fatigue for how she reacted.

Static crackling in her ears, Jiayi wrenched herself away and sliced her fist through the air, gritting her teeth when the pain of hitting the meat of a human head raced up her arm. A man groaned and stumbled to the ground.

It was Su gonggong, of course it was Su gonggong. It was the first time she had hit him. He wasn't so tough. He was just a man. Hit any man in the right place enough times, and there's no longer a man, just a corpse.

The static in her head grew louder.

Jiayi would just kill him. Nobody would miss him. Nobody would look for him. It wouldn't be hard. Neither of them was where they were supposed to be. She would need to bring her fist down again.

And again.

And again.

Things would be okay then.

Everything would be okay.

"Have you lost your mind?"

That.

That wasn't Su gonggong.

Jiayi hurried to pick up the lantern that had fallen to the ground and shone it over the body sprawled before her.

It was Prince Han!

"You–I–um," a million thoughts raced through her head, but the only thing that came out, at last, was, "Where's Sang'er?"

Prince Han stared up at her in disbelief.

"You attack me, and the first thing out of your mouth is about my eunuch? Once again, have you lost your mind?"

"Please forgive me, my lord," Jiayi said, falling to her knees, "I was startled and behaved poorly,"

Prince Han said nothing. He picked up his lantern that fell to the wayside and stood up before spitting a mouthful of blood at his feet.

"It's nearly dawn. What are you doing out here?"

"A walk,"

"A walk? A palace maid came for a walk in the dead of night just a stone's throw away from the military barracks to go on a walk?" Prince Han let out a mean laugh, "Do you take me for a fool?"

It took some time, but Jiayi eventually shook the cobwebs out of her head and realized what Prince Han was accusing her of—an affair.

Her.

An affair?

Sometimes The Emperor sounded grave like this, but Xiang gui ren laughed and laughed. Maybe Prince Han was joking.

"Are you joking?"

When the words slipped out, Jiayi wanted to snatch them back.

"I just...I would never do something like that. I've–I haven't been able to sleep since my arrest, so I sometimes take walks. I'd never been to the barracks, so I didn't know to avoid it. Please forgive me,"

Prince pursed his lips before shaking his head, "Fine. Rise. Go back to Xiang gui ren,"

"Thank you, my lord,"

Jiayi stood and backed around Prince Han, intending to obey his orders. She stopped, a thought popping into her head. Jiayi had thanked De gui fei for coming to her aide during her interrogation; it would only be fair to do the same to Prince Han.

"My lord!"

Prince Han turned to her.

"Thank you for speaking on my behalf in front of Her Highness and His Majesty,"

"I didn't do it for you,"

"Oh," said Jiayi, "Then I thank you on Xiang gui ren's behalf,"

"Her Highness is the example for women around the world," said Prince Han, "How would it look if rumors ran rampant that she couldn't govern His Majesty's concubines and let such lewd conduct run wild? What would it look like if the concubine His Majesty dragged from a brothel caused such a scandal right under his nose? Wei guniang, you can consider this a favor if you'd like. But understand that it is the first and last I will do for you,"

✺

"Your Majesty, you've been working all day; take a break, only for a moment,"

Shen huang gui fei gently pried the calligraphy brush from his hands. The Emperor sat down heavily in his chair, mouth pinched with pain. He rubbed at his temple for a moment. Shen huang gui fei quickly continued the massage with both hands.

The last few weeks for Shen huang gui fei had been ever so peaceful. With Jiang gui ren bed bound and The Empress busy preparing for The Empress Dowager's birthday, barely anyone could rival her for The Emperor's attention. Xiang gui ren was there, of course, but since rumors began to run about her poisoning her housemate, His Majesty flipped her tag less and less. He usually called for her on days like this to hear the soothing sounds of her zither, but today he only asked for Shen huang gui fei.

"Is something troubling you, Your Majesty?"

"Duchess Zian  came to greet The Empress today. She told me that Yigue passed away," he said.

So that was the cause of The Emperor's melancholy. The death of his nephew, born to his favorite older brother. 

"Wasn't Yigue only 16?" Asked Shen huang gui fei.

The Emperor nodded, "16 and unmarried. Duke Zian is nearly 60 and his only son is gone. I've told him again and again that a man of his status should take more concubines and let his house flourish but he refuses to listen. The Duchess and his concubines are passed middle aged now. There's no chance he'll have another son now,"

"Your Majesty, please calm down. You'll make yourself sick worrying for him,"

"I want to worry for him. Duke Zian's treated is the only one who never treated me like I was an enemy in fight for The Late Emperor's favor. When I became crown prince, he supported me fully. He deserves to have good life and afterlife but that's impossible to do without a son," 

There.

There was Shen huang gui fei's chance. The one thing Shen huang gui fei lacked was backing. Her clan was small and her father a middling court official and none of her many brothers managed to gain any footholds in places that mattered. The only reason her mother managed to become a wet nurse in the palace was through her friendship with The Late Empress' sister. 

While her brothers had little talent, Shen huang gui fei did have plenty of unmarried sisters at home. A marriage into Duke Zian's household was a powerful match that could spell a promotion for her father or maybe something more. 

"What if you just gift him a few young women?" Asked Shen huang gui fei. 

"There's no point," said The Emperor, "He'd just refuse,"

"The Duke may refuse, but would The Duchess? She must know how her household has failed by not being able to nurture more than one son for The Duke. She wouldn't dare refuse the honor of accepting women of Your Majesty's choice for The Duke's sake,"

The Emperor hummed in consideration, "I would need two good girls. There's no point in upending things to wind up with no children. I'll chat with The Empress. She has an eye for these things. She chose a gêgê from the Fuca clan for my 17th brother, and the girl birthed four children for him,"

Shen huang gui fei transitioned to massaging The Emperor's shoulders, "We don't have to trouble Her Highness with something like this right now, Your Majesty. She's so busy caring for the back palace and The Empress Dowager. Let me assist you in her stead,"

The Emperor ran a hand across his mustache, "Will it be your considerations or yours and Royal Mother?"

"Your Majesty is my number one priority," said Shen huang gui fei, "If The Empress Dowager is displeased by my choices, I will gladly take the brunt of her anger as long as your worries are eased,"

It was the truth. Even if The Empress Dowager disagreed, Shen huang gui fei wasn't going to miss this chance. One day The Empress Dowager will be laid to rest beside The Late Emperor and Shen huang gui fei would only have herself to depend on. If she could make her family more valuable to The Emperor and  more connected in court, even The Empress would have to kneel to her. 

"Fine then," said The Emperor, "Choose wisely," 

"I always do, Your Majesty,"

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

(You can vote for this story on wattpad here)

[grex-statera]

Chapter 4: Crossroads - Spring, Year 1

The door to the saloon flung open and there stood Ellie, in all her five feet glory. Sorry, five feet and ONE inch glory. She looked a bit disheveled but still presentable, as always.

Gus: Hello there, Elliot! Care for a drink?

Oh god, that definitely attracted too much attention. The entire saloon was looking at her the entire time.

Ellie, bashfully: H-hey, guys. Nice evening, right?

With that, the conversations returned to normal and Ellie tried to look around for her new friends. In a corner, her eyes met Elliott's.

Elliott: Ellie! Glad you could come.

Ellie: Ahhh, I'm so sorry for being late. I got caught up in a bunch of stuff. Have you guys been here awhile?

Leah: Oh, don't worry about it. We've just been chatting anyway. So you're the second Elliot, huh?

Ellie: Hahaha, that I am. And you're Leah?

Leah: Yup! I live by the river past Jodi's house. Too bad I didn't get to meet you yesterday but welcome to Pelican Town, nonetheless.

Ellie: That's alright. And thank you, Leah.

Leah: Don't mention it. So, should we get a proper dinner now?

Ellie: Oh my god, you haven't had dinner yet??

Elliott: Ah, don't worry Ellie, we had a bunch of appetizers while waiting for you. Shame, they're all gone now.

Ellie: Oh no!! Yeah let's get something to eat. My treat!

The three of them got Gus' special platter for the night, some wine for Elliott and juice for the two ladies.

Leah: And you just upped and left like that? Wow, I mean yeah I guess I essentially did the same thing but I had to plan it for a long while before doing so, y'know?

Ellie: Yeah, everything was so sudden! They didn't want to let me go in the office but I really had to leave.

Elliott: But why not have your father be the one to take care of the farm?

Ellie: I've asked him that a lot of times before. But I guess, ultimately, grandpa really left the farm to my name so I should be the one responsible for it (sigh)

Leah: Hmm, makes sense. Well if you ever feel lonely out there, feel free to drop by my cabin. It's not too long of a walk.

Elliott: Mine as well, though it IS too long of a walk (chuckle)

Ellie: Thanks a lot guys. Thank you for making me feel so welcome in here.

Leah: Aw, don't mention it! Hey do you play video games?

Ellie: Yeah, I do sometimes.

Leah: Nice. Want to check out the arcade games Gus has?

Ellie: There's an arcade in here?

Ellie looks behind her trying to find the area.

Leah: Yeah, come on, I'll show you.

Elliott: I'll be staying here. Feeling a bit too tipsy to stand for too long. Please, enjoy yourselves.

Leah: (sigh) Alright, Mr. Wine Connoisseur. As if you even play video games. Come on, Ellie.

Leah leads Ellie across the bar. It's pretty lively since it's a Friday night. Robin and Demetrius were dancing and the other older residents are all chatting away.

Ellie: The atmosphere here is so nice.

Leah: Hm? Yeah, it feels very homely. Okay, here we are.

At the other end of the saloon, in somewhat of a backroom, there were two arcade machines and a pool table. Sam, Abigail and Sebastian were there playing pool.

Abby: Ellieeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!! You're here!!

Elliot met Abigail and Sam yesterday and they already decided they were friends with her. Nevermind that she's quite awkward, but there's just something calming about her presence, in general.

Abby jogs a bit to Ellie and gives her a hug.

Ellie: Oh-!

Sam: Hey, Ellie! Nice to see ya here!

Ellie: Hi, Sam! Hey, Seb..

Sebastian was focusing on a ball, calculating his angle for his next move.

Seb: Hey.

Abby: Oh, I forgot to invite you to hang out with us tonight, but I'm glad to see you here, though!

Ellie: That's alright. I'm actually here with Leah and Elliott.

Leah: Heya.

Leah already booted up JunimoKart and was trying - and failing - to get past the first level. Abby was still clinging to Elliot while they watch Leah.

Ellie: Do you guys, uh, hang out here every Friday?

Abby: Yuyup. It's actually been boring with just these two, if I'm gonna be honest.

Sam: Hey, we can hear that, y'know?

Ellie: Hahaha. What do you guys usually do? Just play pool?

Sebastian: (scoff) What else is there to do in this boring ass town?

He has a point but for some reason the way Sebastian talks just ticks Elliot off. What a snob. If you don't want to have fun then just go home, Elliot thought. She held her tongue, though.

Ellie, rolling her eyes: ...Right.

Abby: Eugh, don't mind Seb. He's just trying to be cool by being a jerk again.

Sebastian: I'm not being a jerk. Just telling the truth.

He takes a shot at the pool table.

Sam: OHHHHHH! Damn, I lost again. Gah, I don't wanna play anymore.

Sebastian, grinning: Hmph, spoilsport.

On the other hand, Leah was almost through beating the second level of JunimoKart

Ellie: Yay! You can do it, Leah!

Leah: Oh my god, just a bit more.

Ellie and Abby watch Leah's run intently. Not daring to even bother her until she eventually reached the end of the level

Leah: YESSSSS!!! Now that's a personal best from me!

Ellie: Haha, that was great, man!

Leah: You wanna try it, Ells?

Oh. Suddenly, Elliot was back home at Zuzu City. Sitting in the kitchen, preparing a report. "Hey, Ells", her father would always greet her. Ah, but that was a different time. She can always go back there to visit.

Ellie: Hmmmm, maybe some other time.

Abby: You should try the other one too - Journey of the Prairie King. It's shooter, though.

Ellie: Sure, I'll check it out next time.

Abby: You guys wanna join us for a bit?

Sam and Seb have left the pool table and are now eating pizza on the couch, talking about stuff.

Ellie checked her watch: almost 11 pm.

Ellie: Uhh, actually, y'know what? I think I'll be heading home for now.

Leah: Oh, yeah sure. Wanna walk home together? We should go get Elliott too.

Ellie: Yeah, sounds good.

Abby: Aw, going home already? Are you a homebody like Sebastian too? That's probably gonna make you hard to hang out with...

Sebastian turns to them, hearing his name.

Seb: What do you want?

Abby: Nothing! I was just saying you and Ellie here are so alike. Well, kinda.

Ellie: Well if you wanna hang out you can just tell me. Here, let me give you my number.

Abby: Oooh, I'd like that! Yes, please!

Leah: Wait, can I have it too?

Ellie: Sure!

Sam: Wait, wait, me three. Come on, Seb.

Seb: Ugh.

The group exchanged numbers with each other and then it was time to go home.

Leah: Alright, see ya guys around!

Abby: Byee!!

Sam: See ya!

Sebastian waved goodbye.

Abby: Ellie's pretty cool, no?

Sam: Yeah, chillest person ever. She's like if Seb was actually cool.

Sebastian furrowed his eyebrows.

Seb: What the hell does THAT mean?

Sam: Dude, listen. Alright, yeah, you're cool. But only cus you're like, held together by duct tape with "cool" written all over it. Check out Elliot: she can get along with anybody cus her vibes are immaculate. Yours, though.

Sam gave Sebastian a grimace. Sebastian hit sam with one of the throw pillows on the couch. Abby can't help but laugh.

Abby: That's so real, though. Local emo guy thinks he's so cool cus he's a bitch with daddy issues. And then BAM! Sweet farmer girl out-cools him.

Seb: Hey. Not funny.

Sam: We should totally adopt Ellie into our group. We would be unstoppable!

Seb: No one's stopping us in the first place anyway. And three is already a crowd, don't you think?

Abby: Ugh, shut up, Seb. The more, the merrier! I'm gonna invite her on Wmovie Wednesday.

Seb: Not coming then.

Sam: Whoa, whoa, whoa. No way, dude. You're not 'not coming'. Come on, it's just a couple movies, jeez. What's your issue?

Seb: My issue -(sharp inhale-exhale)- is that you've made her so annoying.

Abby: What the hell?

Seb: Cut it out with this cool vibes talk and I'll reconsider.

Sam: Dude. She hasn't done anything yet and you already dislike her? Man.

Seb: I don't dislike her, okay? Alright, here's the thing I find really annoying about her: she leaves the city -a place where you can go anywhere and BE anyone- and settles into the countryside to be a farmer?? That just doesn't make sense!

Abby: THAT'S your issue with her?

Seb: Think about it, Abby. A lot of us here are bored out of our minds thinking of what to do with our lives and how to get out of this... This stagnant-ass place. And then this guy just wastes a life of opportunity in the city to keep herself in a box! So stupid.

Sam: Sheesh, Seb. That's not stupid, y'know? Maybe she just wants a more peaceful life. You have no idea how hectic it can get in the city.

That's true. Sure, Sebastian has been to the city a lot of times, but it's only to be a visitor for a bit. If he'd had lived in the city, would he have liked the concrete jungle as it is? The rat race that one needs to compete in to make ends meet? This was something that Sebastian has put at the back of his mind, but now that there's someone who's fresh with the experience, it's something he should really be considering if he's dead-set on moving into the city someday.

Seb: Alright, sorry. Maybe I was being too harsh. I'll be there on Wednesday.

Abby: Nice. And dude? Just be nice, okay? Ellie seems like a genuinely good person. We could have more fun with her around, y'know?

Sam: Yeah! She's really chill. Could be good for you.

Seb: Right, right. Maybe I'm just a lil bit more stressed lately. Alright, I'm gonna dip.

Abby: Yeah, let's go home. Mom and dad's probably gonna try to kill me again tomorrow.

Sam: Aight guys, see ya.

+++++

A small candlelight flickers in the Wizard's quarters. It's half past 2 am and he still hasn't slept. A Junimo appears thru the hardwood floor. It started speaking in an ancient language.

Wizard: You encountered the fledgeling yesterday? Ah, so she has received my letter after all. I shall send her my way. Preparations must be started at once.

+++++

Elliot was walking through a forest. She has never been here but it felt so familiar. She kept on walking until there was a clearing. There was a round table and two chairs. For some reason, she felt like this is where she was supposed to go to; that it had been waiting for her for ages; that she had been waiting for so long to sit here. On the table was a tea set and some pastries. She took her seat and poured herself a cup of tea. As she she was savoring her beverage, an old man clad in black robes sat on the other chair.

Ellie: Rasmodius.

Rasmodius: How have you been, fledgeling?

Elliot knew the name of the person in front of her, but she did not know him at all. She felt as if, it were her voice but it's not her who was thinking and speaking the words.

Ellie: I've heed your call. I have returned to the flock.

Rasmodius: I can indeed sense your presence. But this is not yet the flock you shall return to. The Grex Statera is upon us. You must prepare.

Ellie: I understand. Teach me. What do I need to know?

Rasmodius: Find me at the heart of Cindersap Forest. I will show you the path to walk on.

Elliot wakes up in cold sweat. Her heart banging on her ribcage. She looked for her phone: 7:30 am.

Elliot: Ughhhhh what the heck. My head...

She made her way to the kitchen and drank some water. On her small table her community map was laid down.

Rasmodius: Find me at the heart of Cindersnap Forest.

The voice echoed in her head.

Ellie: Okay. So I guess this is where the magic part starts, huh? Lemme just water my crops then.

She puts on her good ol' cap and starts the day.

[adultswim2021]

Xavier: Renegade Angel #7: “Bloodcorn” | December 17, 2007 - 12:00AM | S01E07

Xavier sees an ad for a popular mass-produced cookie which is advertising cookie-tampon combos. Xavier takes the ad’s claim that there was a “mix-up” at the factory, at face value, and becomes overly concerned. He travels there and when he realizes how much pollution comes out of the plant he plugs up a drainage pipe. Toxic sludge backs up into the factory and causes the plant to close. 

Xavier decides to help one of the now jobless workers by going to his farm to perform various dances (a rain dance, which he forgets, a memory dance, which he also forgets, and an irony-neutralizing dance that only works if it’s raining). Fed up, the farmer shoots into the air at god. Blood pours from the sky, which invigorates his crops but turns them into monsters. Xavier saves the day by launching copious cookie tampons into the sky, plugging up the blood rain. 

This one is only hampered by the fact that two episodes ago we had blood Indians and blood cowboys fighting in a similar blood-meets-soil vein. It’s no big deal, really. Both episodes are very strong. It really only makes things confusing in conversation if you were trying to recall which episodes were which. It’s a shallow complaint. For my roommate and myself this was appointment television for us, and I still remember the parts where we laughed hardest. Xavier’s panic when the ad’s “mix-up” claim happens had us in hysterics. I’m not sure if the “mix-up at the factory” trope has aged any since this episode aired. Just in case it has: please know it was a thing. Um... look it up!!!!

There’s another moment that’s notable for perhaps requiring additional context: a sequence where Adult Swim style text supposedly replaces a dream sequence that is too mind-blowing to render. It looks a little bit like the Adult Swim bumpers of the era. The text looks rather large here, and I’m guessing that’s because I’m watching this on HBOMax. The show originally aired letterboxed in a 4:3 image, so I’m guessing the font size was effected by that in the conversion. NOTE: Nobody is allowed to make fun of me for typing the previous paragraph.

There is an early part where Xavier is watching “Darfur Doodles”, a presumably tasteless/wacky program starring malnourished war orphans. An announcer says “Darfur Doodle will be right black”, a joke that I love so much. It’s the kind of thing only a nihilistic POC could write and get away with. This is why we need more nihilistic POC writing comedy. 

Another incredible joke that I think often: I didn’t even really remember that it was in this episode or scene: During one of the cookie ads, they are showing a montage of people giving various testimonials about the new product, and among them is just some dude in a red convertible saying “what do I care?” and driving off while flipping the bird (some of you know what I mean!!!!). So fucking funny. This another joke I can remember bustin’ up laughin’ at. Lookin’ glorious.

More jokes I liked, only because I’m in a mood to remember about jokes: “she’s 14” “nice and legal”. Also the part where the evil blood cloud uses a smokestack to blow cigarette-style smoke onto a bunch of people, causing them to become soot-covered, immediately causing them to be beaten by police officers. Also one last last thing: there is a brief bit where they use a small bit of footage of a dog-faced humanoid looking anguished. This is from the 1981 Clash of the Titans, and this clip was repeatedly over the course of Wonder Showzen, so much so that I almost consider this to be a cross-over.

MAIL BAG

Your Katrina/Soda Pop joke would have cost you your job if you were the Aflac Duck.

If I were the aflac duck I would’ve contracted terminal angel wing from eating all the popcorn and euthanized by the haven humane society (the same people who forced us to kill our dog for being too noisy)

[psychologeek]

I mean, this is more than that.

Because saying "X is bad", while not giving any other option, is useless.

Do I think slavery is bad? Yes. Because it takes away autonomy and self control. Because the chance of abuse is too damn high. Because I don't believe that owning and/or being owned is psychologically good for people.

(Which people seem to care less when it's disabled and "crazy" people. when

But it's still can be better than starving to death, for example. Or your child starving. Or being executed for debts. Or several other things that could be a reason for someone to become a slave.

(That are still, btw, going on in places on this very day. People work in sweat shops for small payments. Mines and farms and constructions and cleaning and all the hard work that just need to be done. Parents would sell their daughters for marriage because they have no money to feed them and the family. People get addicted and do anything for the next part. People doing horrible things for a chance, for their dreams, for a passport, for money, for-)

This is, in a way, like discussions about drugs and sex work.

Are you going to prohibited it?

Or are you going to put regulations about it and standards?

Are we going to illegalise sex work, or put regulations - so if a sex worker is hurt, he/she can put charges. Can ask for sick days and medical help and yes, law enforcement included, without fear of going to prison themselves?

Are we going to say "Ew, no, junkies are evil and bad and outcasts" or are we gonna have things like free needles and needles disposal stations, with help for those who want it? Are we gonna focus on "drugs is bad you're bad", or actually look for fucking HELP? (Bc ppl don't go to drugs for the lolz. Ppl go to drugs bc they are HURT. Bc there's no other options (or so it seems). Bc it's a way out of the pain, and it's available. Bc it's familiar and easier to take a bunch of pills and go to work with a fucked up leg then ask for a day off and being scared you'll be fired being scared you can't afford daycare being just so tired of being in this fucked up cycle).

(Fuck. This is going to be very long if I put all I think and want here.)

~

Another espect you ignored, is that the Torah is ~3,500 years old. Like, there had been SOME CHANGES in the years. And that's why we have the Halacha and Psikot etc. I mean, looking at the Torah about modern stuff is like saying you know the law bc you read the constitution, or the declaration of independence.

I believe there had been some changes in the last centuries in the law system of (whatever country you live in).

So. Let's go back to the time of the Tankh, shall we?

Who becomes a slave?

Have you ever thought about it?

And like. This isn't happening in a vacuum. This is how things going that time.

Okay, so you don't buy the slave. But others will. What good do you do? Does it help the slave? Does it help you? Is it practical for the society?

Now, I'm going to talk about enslaved people (aka were free and no more).

In most cases, that's people who had no money and either sold themselves/were sold for paying debt/to get money for the family.

What the Torah says?

(well, midrash says "bought a slave to himself, bought a master to himself).

But, well: not to abuse. To feed the slave properly. The slave must have a day off once a week. There are strict rules about sex with a slave. (And more).

Like, this isn't perfect. But that was what was possible then.

In case of Eved Ivri, they would be released in a Yovel (I think maybe even shmitta).

That's why it's called "Torah" (from "hora'ah": command, tutorial, guidance).

This isn't some kind of a magic vow one must obey. This is... well, I guess you can call it a life style. It's Halacha, a way of walking.

~

And all I know about slaves in islam is about Um Al-Walid ("mother of child") - if a slave have a child with her owner, the child is considered free iirc, and she gets some privileges about it.

And also some stories from Yemen, about the slaves of the Muslims. But that's mostly from a book written by a Mari.

Why doesn’t the Torah condemn owning human beings as property?

Because they were wrong. We now recognize that they were wrong. Here is a more robust explanation into the context of slavery when Jewish texts permitted slavery, which were quite progressive for the time. Now, why doesn't the New Testament condemn any of the same shit as the Torah beyond vague "we can eat pork because Jesus showed up"? Why doesn't the Qur'an condemn Jihad against the Jews? If you want to come for the Torah you had better be giving equal weight to the immoral shit from other religions.

[engbergsinfinland]

Back from Ruka and a Happy Monday!

Hi all! Well, we are on the train back to Tamepre from Helsinki airport, after a three-day trip to Ruka Ski Resort outside of Kuusamo, and a little trip to Santa's cottage while there. We hade a great time, but I think I may have come down with a touch of a cold! I am not surprised, because this week has been so go-go-go. I was exhausted last night and the night before and felt my eyelids weighted heavily while I was sitting on the couch watching TV.

The Fulbright Thanksgiving at Josh's apartment was so nice! He holds the Bicentennial Chair in American Studies at Helsinki University and with that Fulbright comes a specific apartment and the Bicentennial Chair always has it. It is spacious and very old-style, with built-ins, antique furniture, and even draperies from the '70s ;) But, it was such a lovely setting for the Thanksgiving feast. And what a feast it was! The kids had a great time too, even ending the evening with some Uno with the other kids who were there.

The next day, along with other Fulbrighters, I got to go to the Finnish Parliament and get a tour of the building (completed in 1938), see a session of Parliament in session, and have lunch with two MPs, one from the Åland islands, Mats Löfström (he represents the Swedish-speaking minority in Finland, and their interests), and one from a Centre party, Mikko Savola (he comes from a farming area, Ähtäri, a ways north of Tampere). It was very, very interesting to hear them speak. Both of them take regular trips on government business to the US, trips that (as you might imagine) center around two main themes: 1. defense and security and 2. trade/industry. They spoke about how important the US/Finland relationship is, especially now with the Ukraine/Russia war and Finland's entrance into NATO. We talked about serious topics, like their hopes for Finnish/US defense collaboration, and about lighter ones, like where in the US they liked most. Mats talked about how breathtaking Yosemite is. I have actually never been there!

So, after our time at Parliament, I returned to Risto's apartment to meet Eric and the kids and start getting everything finalized for leaving that place--getting their bedding/towels laundry done, cleaning up, etc. We then went to play a bit of Finnish floorball, as a fun activity planned by Fulbright. Eric and the kids played with a bunch of other Fulbrighters and kids, and I watched, and the Fulbright employee who taught them about the game had her four-month-old baby there, so that was the job I self-appointed myself: caring for that lil' one! So, so cute. Floorball is a very fast-paced game, like soccer and hockey. Like hockey, it has sticks. Like soccer, it's on land ;) After floorball, we scooted (not literally, but figuratively) back to the apartment, got our things, and took an Uber to the airport. Off to Kuusamo we flew! And we flew on a propeller plane! I managed to not lose my sh*t too. It was a smooth flight and I was *sure* that on a clear flying night like that, I'd have a good chance of seeing the aurora out the plane window! No such luck. Once we got the rental car, I was *sure* we might be able to see it in the clear starry sky out to car window, but, nope, no such luck. Although, I think if we'd stopped on our drive to our rental house, in the middle of nowhere, we might have been able to. I think I saw the faint lines vertically across the sky from the car window in the dark, dark night. And if we'd gotten out of the car, away from its lights and the street lights, they might've popped. Alas. No such luck. And the next two nights in Kuusamo were cloudy. We did go out the second night to the snowy forest (which was a bit scary), and there was too much cloud cover for seeing anything. I am still holding out hope!

Our rental home adjacent to the Ruka ski resort was amazing! It was a nice cottage made out of just *massive* logs. It was like living in an actual Lincoln Log home. The kids were so thrilled with the small kids bedrooms upstairs. All of the linens and kitchen tools and appliances were of such high quality. It makes sense that they were, because we had to pay through the nose for the place. I could not find anything at the resort itself when I booked only about 5 weeks ago, but now I know there was that World Cup ski race I mentioned in my last post-- and perhaps that is why lodging was so tight (side note: our flight back to Helsinki Monday morning was full of World Cup athletes from that race and Rowan and I sat next to a ski tech for the German team, who was a former ski jumper himself). Anyway about our rental home, we were absolutely thrilled with the place we had. No bathtub, though! I am so, so eager to get myself in a bathtub. I may just rent a hotel room in Tampere with a bathtub for one day -- and just sit in it all day ;)

Ok -- I see that this post is getting insanely long already -- and I have not even told about our afternoon with Santa at his cottage outside of Kuusamo (Pohjolan Pirtti -- there was tobogganing on a frozen lake! Cookie-making with elves! Singing!) or our ski night and day at Ruka! I'll briefly summarize that the time with Santa was amazing and the kids had so, so much fun, and I really enjoyed talking with a family from Spain that was also there (and the mom and I may go have coffee in Madrid when I go there in March!). The skiing at Ruka was fun too, but I could not see well, with the fog and my googles getting like an icy windshield on a car. And the slopes had lots of icy patches. But, it was all in all very, very fun skiing there.

Alrighty--I will fill in some details in the next post. But, for now, WHEW! What a busy week we had this last week!

[adarkrainbow]

Les Contes du Korrigan (2)

Now let us begin our exploration of these korrigan tales proper... This first one is actually a comic-book adaptation of the Breton version of a quite famous fairytale of France... Or rather a prominent fairy-tale type in France. The Grimm had a version of it in their stories: it is this fairytale-type about people (usually one good person, one bad person) meeting up the "Little Folks" or supernatural "small men", and receiving as a result of their interactions a reward (for the good person) and a punishment (for the bad person). I posted earlier two French variations of this story: the legend of the Little Horned Men, and the story of the felteus. Now let us discover how it goes in Bretagne...

Once upon a time there were two brothers, Kaour and Laouig. They lived with their father in a small farm, and could only earn money as musicians, because they suffered from a handicap that made them ugly in the eyes of men and unproper for physical work: they both had a huge hump on their back. While they looked almost identical, one could easily identify them, for Kaour was a brave and joyful man, while Laouig was a grumpy and arrogant one.

The comic shows the brothers performing at the double marriage of the two daughters of one of the farmers of the area. Kaour is praised by all for his talent at playing the biniou (a traditional musical instrument for Bretagne) and when talking about his hump, he has joyful and uplifting comments, joking around about how the Lord told him once his hump would bring him luck, hence why he takes well care of it. Laouig, instead, gets into trouble because he frightens a little girl who commented on his appearance, then insults the girl's mother when she gets angry at this, and finally gets hit in the face by the girl's father.

Due to the wedding costing him a lot (he must feed the guests coming for the dual marriage for three whole days), the farmer explains to Kaour that he will have to pay them less money than planned, though in exchange he offers to send them large bags of grain by the next harvest. Kaour understand and thanks him, while Laouig is much less pleased by the situation, almost wanting to leave - only for Kaour to beg him to stay, because they promised to keep playing music at least for one more night. We also learn that Kaour is in love with one of the girls working for the farmer, Yvonnaïg - she is the one that encouraged the farmer to hire them as musicians, and in exchange it is her that Kaour wants to please by playing his best at the wedding feast. Laouig keeps telling his brother he will never get his girl, but still agrees to play one more night for his sake - though he does so while insulting in his heart everybody at the feast, considering them to be just cheapstakes and drunkards.

Once the festivities come to an end, the brothers return home by the moonlight (and as they go away Yvonnaïg, asked about her feelings for Kaour, explains that no, she shall never marry him, because he is ugly and poor - she could marry "a monster", yes, but only if he is rich). Laouïg promises to never play again for this bunch of folks, and makes haste to go back home as fast as he could. Kaour, meanwhile, hears a music and sees a fire away in the night - curious, he goes investigating, while Laouig tells him he is just drunk and seeing things.

Kaour climbs on the hill, only to discover that the fire and music comes from korrigans having a party. Frightened, the hunchback tries to flee as fast as he can... only to get caught as the korrigans smelled his human odor. The korrigans first offer to kill and eat him - but their leader, noticing he has a biniou by his side, offers the man to entertain them with some music. Not wanting to be turned into a soup, Kaour plays for the korrigans until he gets exhausted and has no more breath in his lungs... But when he claims he can't do music anymore, the korrigans have flames appear below his feet so he can "dance" for them instead.

Exhausted and half-burned, Kaour tries to find a way to escape the tricks and angers of the korrigans - and hopefully for him he is a quite intelligent man. He notices that the song the korrigans are singing again and again is "Dilun, Dimeurz, Dimercher" (Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday in Breton). So, he gladly offers to tell them the "second part" of their song - and the korrigans are baffled at the idea that there is a part of their own song they don't know about. So Kaour sings "Diriaou ha Digwener" ("Thursday and Friday"), and the korrigans like it, as it rhymes and keeps the tone and format of the song.

To reward the man, the leader of the korrigans offers him to choose between "the appearance of a lord, or the money-pouch of a bourgeois". Kaour explains that his only wish is to please Yvonnaïg, so he would like to lose his hump. The korrigan leader removes the hump, and tells Kaour that he is now as "tall and ugly" as the other humans. Kaour returns home, only for Laouig to be amazed and then angry at his brother's new appearance, threatening him into telling him how he lost his hunch. Kaour tells him what happened, and Laouig immediately travels to the hill of the korrigans. But not to lose his hump... rather he thinks his brother is stupid for not taking the money the korrigans offered, and he wants to be rich.

He appears at the korrigan's party, and offers to play music for them, which they agree to. After a moment, he tells them that their song is too short, and they need to sing the end too. And so he adds "Ha disadorn ha disul", Breton for "And Saturday and Sunday". Except that in Breton language, not only do these words not fit the earlier ones in term of lenghth and rythm (Dilun, Dimeurz, Dimerc'her! Diriaou ha Digwener! Ha Disadorn had disul!), but on top of that it doesn't even rhyme. The korrigans are not very pleased and want to eat the man, but their leader reminds them that it is a tradition to reward any mortal being that participates in their party and helps in their entertainment - for "it is the intention that counts". The korrigan leader offers him the same choice as Kaour...

... But Laouig makes a big mistake. He says that he wants "What Kaour left behind". By this, he meant he wanted the money that Kaour refused to take... but the korrigans take him to his word, and instead gave him the hump that had been removed from Kaour's back.

Kaour, now free from his difformity, ended up marrying Yvonnaïg - because thanks to his good looks, he was now invited much more to various parties and paid better for his music, resulting in him earning enough money to please Yvonnaïg's father, while she enjoyed his new looks. However, Laouig's bad temper worsened now that he had two humps on his back - he kept getting into fights with everybody, including his father and brother. One day he left his farm, wanting to live all on his own, but not taking any musical instrument because he was disgusted by music after the korrigan incident... However he could only wander as a beggar throughout Bretagne, chased by all as a monster and demon, and he became a legend of his own...

... the story concludes that he ended up in Paris, where he had a carreer as a "bell-ringer" in a "quite famous cathedral" and that his life there inspired a "famous author of humans" - turning the lazy, greedy and vain Laouig into a quite "romantic" character.

[kkumahearts]

february 13, 2023

i haven’t updated since december… oops! so many things have happened since then. this is so weiiird!

maybe a month and a half ago philip dmed me blablabla chicken and rice blablabla and we got food. it was cute and we walked around a lot. i've also realized i don't enjoy processing feelings i think i tend to ignore them until they go away or just mold into me. anyways and then new years eve happened and he asked me to come over and we could go to a party. he was like i wanna see you again and all that. i took half an edible and he was kinda fucked bc he took a full one and had a brownie and some shots. the party was literally all upper classmen and i was sooo out of my element. we sat on a bench literally the entire time after he talked to a bunch of guys. oh yeah also!! man party!! ratio was 3:1 guys and girls. so i was REALLY out of my element. and since i was so out of it i started drinking those seltzers like crazy. i had like five like wayyy too many definitely not one my brightest choices. but what can i say. i kissed his cheek somewhere along the night and he said oh u wanna kiss and then kissed me. super messy kisser btw. after that i mean there was the new years kiss duh and emma was texting calling omg my dad called and i was like bruh and also texted perfect viet to him like i was genius in that moment my brain was working so hard.

emma swooped in and i bonked my head on the car. seriously not one my best moments because i kept saying bye to philip and he was really fucking high and emma thought he was pissed. jack and julia were there. oh and before he came to pick me up from beas to go to the party and his house before. i was hyperventilating in the house and jack was like "just go with the flow...?" and i was like ARGHHHAAAHHHHHHHH

wow this is gonna be one long ass entry. anyways. we meet twice after that. the next time i just go to his house for a little. i bussed and we walk his dog enzo who really hates going on walks like the amount of resistance that dog put up was crazy. and then i laid in his bed which made him hop over and cuddle me from the back. and then we lay there and talk for a little but its mostly him talking bc my brain goes blank when i talk to him. he told me so much about farm subsidies. i like the way he thinks.

and then i was like i gotta go philip! and he was like just let me kiss u first ;DDD and i was like yo. this crazy. and it was like heavy we had to take pauses to breathe and i was breathing all over his neck god i rly like his neck. i kept telling him youre so messy and he was like giggle giggle "youre...not" and then he walked me back to beas and i waited for my mom and then bea came rolling up blasting music in her car.

this is literally a whole ass essay but i feel like i should update. i think i use this blog to vent mostly so when i look back at it itll just be depressing. why do i even care if its long... not like future amy will gaf. anyways i was prepared for that to be the last time i saw him for a while because mr is in eugene. but i was talking to emma and mimi and they were like amy there is a whole ass four days we can make this happen!~~ and i was like ur right.... let me beg my parents!! there was tiny drama bc we couldnt go with bea and julia to the market and they ignored us when we waved but moving on...

and then i got to his houseyyyyy and i was so super nervous and emma and mimi were hypign me in the car. i had to be back at like eight so we were on a tight sched. i think he led me up the stairs and held my shoulders but I'm gonna be honest i don't remember. anyways i brought him canes and he put that in the kitchen and we went upstairs and just sit on the bed... and i was like do you wanna eat? like the food is there lets go and he was like nope no no nah nah no. and then i was like okay.... idk put in some filler sentences there and then he said "i feel like i should make a move..." and i said "no pressure...i mean i can make a move... nobody needs to be making moves here.." and then he kissed me while we sat on the edge of the bed. then he takes off his shirt and he's like smirking and in my head im like this has rly escalated.. and we fuuuuucc ccccccckkkkkkk. i’m happy my first time was with him, and it was perfect. we were laughing and silly and he was oh so cute. i am too lazy to. continue updating bc i have memories so it’s not necessary.

[crtter]

Some context: my dad lives and works in Saudi Arabia and he ended up befriending a group of stray dogs that lived near his workplace not too long after he moved. You see, my family rescues and cares for abandoned animals ever since I was a kid, and my dad LOVES dogs, so he started bringing them some kibble every day after he clocked out. One day, he noticed that one of the dogs, a female who was caring for a litter of eight puppies, had died of unknown causes overnight. And my dad couldn't bring himself to leave them to fend off all for themselves, so he just adopted all eight of them. Since he lives in a rental home over there, though, he and my mom agreed that, whenever he'd come visit us here in Brazil, he'd bring some of the puppies to live with us.

Now, we already had dogs and, after taking in some of my dad's new dogs, we pretty much ran out of space. However, after my grandma passed away, her former home, a small farm in the countryside, was left empty. It's not in great shape, but it has lots of space. My parents have been slowly renovating it for a while so we can all eventually move there and they decided that the next time my dad came over, he'd bring one of his dogs to stay in the farm, kind of as a test run of the place. There's already a kennel there and one of the neighbors who was close friends with my grandma agreed to look after him whenever we're not around. The dog in question (now three years old, so no longer a puppy), was this handsome fella:

His name is Alamo. My dad likes cowboy movies.

There's something about the dogs my dad adopted, though: he had no idea and neither did we, but it turns out they weren't your average stray. They're middle-eastern village dogs, a very primitive "breed" that's directly descended from the very first dogs to be domesticated by humans, not unlike Carolina dogs or New Guinea singing dogs! They're very sweet, but they can act pretty undoglike sometimes: some of them don't make eye contact, some don't wag their tails, some only howl instead of barking... and, as we'd find out a single day after leaving Alamo in the farm, some of them are excellent climbers. The neighbor called us in a panic, telling us how he had seen Alamo jump over the kennel fence and disappear in the woods.

We went into a frenzy looking for him. We called the city pound, we called vet clinics, we put a bunch of lost dog pamphlets all over town, l even started straight up researching what kinds of enclosures wild canines are kept in in zoos in order to make alterations to the kennel so, if we got him back, he wouldn't be able to escape again (turns out the top two feet of the wire fence have to be bent inwards). Finally, three weeks later, we got a call: Alamo had approached this lady who owned a hot dog cart to beg for food, miles away from the farm, and she managed to put a leash on him! We were so happy to have him back! He was a bit dirty and hungry but no worse for wear, thankfully.

That was over six months ago. A week ago, | got a message from an unknown number. It was a woman from the small town the farm is located in telling me she has found the dog from the pamphlet. And before I can tell her I had already found him, she sends me a picture of a dog that looks like a little clone of Alamo, except younger and with pointier ears. Then it dawns on me: Alamo hadn't been neutered yet when he was lost for those three weeks. And there are a ton of stray dogs in that town, most of them intact.

Long story short, meet Arizona:

Oh yeah, did I mention that I’m raising my dad’s dog’s bastard daughter?