#we had a scene where she found out the court had known where was the whole time she was on the run and she went Hey What The Fuck?
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imo good character-establishing things to have for pcs are like
- the usual why are they on this adventure, why are they w this group, etc
- what's one personality trait that drives them to do the stupid but fun thing
- what's one aspect that might make them act in ways contrary to how they do normally (including Not doing the stupid thing if it wouldn't be fun)
that last one is beneficial for the collaborative aspect of ttrpgs: if everyone else wants to do x, & as a player u wanna cooperate but ur pc would be opposed, how can u navigate that? there's still times to dig ur heels in, but often I've found more value in establishing Why or How my character can be convinced to go along w smth anyway
also just. ppl contradict themselves sometimes, & having even a simple sense of that in ur pcs can both make rp richer & assist in collaborating w the other ppl at ur table
#for example one of my fave moments w my first urban shadows pc (sloane - a fae)#was when we visited the winter court as a party & bc shes a winter fae she got to meet the king#mind u. sloane had spent the Entire game hiding from winter ppl bc she ran away & was scared shed get in trouble#but when the option to Go To The Realm Of Winter came up i was like. okay. everybody else wants to do this. ooc i wanna do this too.#it wouldve been perfectly ic for sloane to refuse but that wouldnt have been fun! so instead#we had a scene where she found out the court had known where was the whole time she was on the run and she went Hey What The Fuck?#you couldve dragged me back the whole time and you Didnt? excuse me? am i not special enough for that??#im offended open the fuckin door so i can go tell the king how cool i am & demand why he didnt want me back more#& like that established So much character for her! shes v prideful to the point of recklessness! & not only was playing that up more fun#it also resulted in a rlly cool session that i wouldnt have gotten to play if she just said No#anyway can u tell i have Opinions lmao#esp on that last point <3#as a dm ive had to manage issues amongst my players multiple times bc ppl get stuck in the mindset of 'but its what my char would do'#even as it gets in the way of collaborative storytelling and actively rankles their friends at the table ooc#ur character can do other things too bud. u just gotta be willing to compromise#okay tangents over ive just been Thinkin#sorrel speaks#dnd#<- does tumblr still only put the first 5 tags in search results. god i hope so i want this in my tag not the main one
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SECRET - A . DONALDSON
Sexual Content Ahead
Art Donaldson x Fem!ChubbyReader
Summary: Where you and Art are 'secretly' hooking up without your friends knowing.
Warnings: SMUT (18+), Born with barely any plot, Art is slightly pathetic in this, Reader loves a cheeky ass grab.
Note: This one is a quick one I rushed, because I'm writing a nice long Art fic for yall. So please enjoy this for now.
If you told yourself 3 years ago that you'd be sat on some bleachers watching tennis you wouldn't believe it.
You were never interested in tennis, you knew about it obviously but it was never your thing.
You came to Stanford as an international student due to the fat scholarship you recieved so you packed your bags from London to California.
That is where you met Tashi Duncan, your best friend. She introduced herself to you one day in the library after hearing you tap away to the music playing in your headphones. It was a close call, she saved you from another warning from the librarian.
Tashi and you were inseparable. Learning about eachother more you discovered she played tennis and was quite well known but you had no clue. She found this a breath of fresh air as everyone knew of her some how. She put it down to the fact your from a different country additionally to your lack of interest of the sport.
Tashi coaxed you to come watch her warm ups and games - which you did being a great friend. But you sported to opening your sketchbook and sketching out the scene infront of you additionally. Might aswell do a research project on human posing and what better sport that tennis.
After your first semester you noticed Tashi always hanging out with this tall lanky man. He seemed nice but, you'd never seen him around. She told you he was her 'thing' which made you both laugh over lunch one time. She had mentioned he will be around alot more and he has a friend and that's when you met Art Donaldson, and well. The rest is history.
It had been a good year since you met Patrick and Art and you four were now a little quad. Despite the three of them being raging tennis players and you just sat on the side line they didn't mind.
You did try to take up a sport but it just wasn't for you, after Tashi found you face down in a bush after a 100m sprint.
You were watching Art play against someone from another University - you weren't listening to their name though.
Tashi and Patrick sat beside you, gasping and groaning, cheering and whooping at what was going on in the game but you only knew so much.
In the year you've known Art, you two had a great bond and tend to.. dip into eachothers bonds from time to time. You had no clue if Tashi or Patrick knew about your occasional flings with Art, you both never aired it nor got caught it just happened sometimes.
But as of late, you can't take your eyes off him. The way his shorts ride up his muscly thighs as he jumps from one end of the court to the other. The way his hair bounces but also sticks to his forehead due to his sweat. You were slightly obsessed.
You wouldn't say you had feelings for him, it never got deep enough for that. But you craved him. You craved every single inch of him and how he'd just melt into your hand.
"COME ON!!" You jump slightly as you were ripped out of your daydream as Tashi flew up beside you screaming as you looked at Art celebrating on the court.
You smiled, standing up and clapping as you grabbed everyone's coats and bags as Tashi and Patrick dashed off to see Art.
Climbing down the stairs was tricky balancing everything but as soon as you saw Tashi and Patrick bust through the door of the court as they piled onto Art you smiled. Walking towards them as you put down the stuff.
Art turned to you smiling, walking up to you and pulling you in for a hug. It wasn't unusual just took you off guard.
"We should celebrate! Let's go out for dinner" Tashi smiled.
"I love a good dinner" You smiled as they all chuckled at you.
You got changed for the dinner into a little black dress, you can never go wrong with it. Tashi texted you earlier her and Patrick will be late - which you assumed they were fucking in his car yet again. Dinners cancelled you assumed.
You walked over to Arts dorm, knocking on the door as it swung open to reveal a slightly disheaved Art as he stared at you. Shirtless and in the tightest pair of shorts ever.
"Did you forget we are going to dinner-"
"No- I was just.. working out" He spoke slightly.
You looked him up and down, a knowing smirk on your face.
"You can't hide it from me" You laughed. Art's face contorted as he looked at you confused as you swiped your hand over the very obvious bulge in his boxers before walking past him into his room.
He doubled over, groaning as he shut the door as you laughed, sitting on his desk chair.
"I thought Tashi was taking you to the restaurant?" He dove onto his bed, laying on his stomach as he scrunched a pillow up at leaned against it looking at you. God he looked so pathetic. Ass up and everything.
"Seems she got preoccupied with Patrick, I got this" You pulled up the text and turned it around to show Art.
"We definitely won't make it to the restaurant now" He laughed.
You stood up, dropping your bag on the chair as you walked over to Art, sitting by his head as he looked up at you.
"What do you wanna do then?" You caressed his cheek, smiling down at him.
"I have a few ideas.." His head turned to kiss your palm as his lips made its way up your arm till he was on his knees infront of you.
You stared at him blankly, sucking in your bottom lip as you took in the situation. You both paused for a brief moment staring at eachother.
You leaned in, kissing him roughly as your hands dropped to his back, pulling him closer as his hands slid up the back of your dress as he squeezed your ass. One thing about Art he loved your ass.
The pair of you tumbling with one another as you yanked down his boxers slightly as the back, grabbing a chunk of his ass with his hand as you sucked onto his tongue. A soft moan leaving his lips as you yanked down his boxers completely rolling over as you caged him below you.
"Mm- want you- s'bad" You pulled at his lip as you sucked on it, grinding down against his bare cock as you reached to pull your dress off in one swift motion.
"Fuck- good girl-" He groaned as he unclasped your bra throwing it off as he pulled your neck and pulled you back into another kiss. It was passionate but needy. The way his tongue slipped in and out of your mouth had you yearning for more. You reached down to wriggle out of your panties as you kicked them off to the side before you held the base of his dick. Running it between your slit as you gasped, pulling away from the kiss.
You bit your lip, sighing as you bucked your hips against his tip. Your hands sliding up over your breasts as you peered down at him. "You piss me off how fucking hot you are. Why are you so fucking hot" You groaned, grinding down harder against him as he harshly gasped.
"Shut up" He whined lightly as he grabbed your hip, lifting you up so he could grab his cock and curve it up towards your entrance as he dropped you down against his abdomen as his cock slipped up inside of you. "Fuck-" You both yelped in unison.
You peered down at him, chuckling softly as you let out soft moans as you rocked back and forth against him. "Oh fuck-" You grit your teeth as your hand slid down his chest as you rocked back and forth. Your thighs slightly twitching as your eyes threatened to roll back.
"Such a good girl f'me aren't you" He smirked, sliding a hand up overs your stomach. This was something Art tended to do. You knew you were chubbier that other girls you'd seen him with before but he was definitely into it. His smile grew as he slid them further up to grip your breast as he squeezed and toyed with it.
You smirked down at him, leaning forward slightly, pecking his lips as your ass rebounded against his abdomen as you dropped down on him continously as you rode him.
"Good.." You spoke with breathy moans as light whines escaped Art's lips as he stared into your eyes. It was pathetic. He was pathetic. The way his eyes watched you.
His hands dropped from your breasts, gripping onto the plush of your thighs as he whined slightly, spreading his legs below you.
You could feel his hips thrusting up into your for more, as you bit your lip moaning lightly. "Yessss~ fuck. Art- s-so good" You yelped as his hands gripped your waist before flipping you onto your back. The movement shocked you but the second he got his balance he began to piston into you.
You reached back, grabbing the headboard of the bed as you yelped. Whines and moans pouring from your mouth as Art demolished you. His hips slamming into you. His balls slapping into your ass as the bed creaked below the pair of you. One of his hands, gripping at a chunk of your thigh as his thumb caressed against the skin. The other, reaching for one of yours as your fingers interlocked with one another.
You reached forward grabbing his ass harshly with your free hand, as you squeezed it, looking up at him, biting your lip.
His mouth ghosting over yours as he let out soft whines and groans - just like he does in tennis. Fuck do you love the sounds he makes when he's playing fucking tennis...
"Yes- Fuck Art please.. Harder" you groaned, your hand removing from his as they both flew to his back, your nails scratched down it as he pounded harder into you.
His groans got louder and needier, as his hands returned to your chunk sides, his fingers dug harder into your hip. His thrusts became sloppier, you knew he was close.
Art threw your legs over his shoulders as he slammed back into you. A guttural moan yelping from your throat as you shrieked, his pace quickening as you whined. Your nails digging into his shoulder as your back arched down against him as your eyes rolled back as you drew closer to your climax.
He knew you were close abd so was he. He continue to pump into you as fast as he could till you both came undone. Both cumming together, his head hung low as he watched a mixture of your releases create a ring at the bottom of his cock as he thrusted a few more times, dragging the pair of you through the high.
"Fuck-" He groaned as he pulled out, biting his lip as he leaned back on his legs as he stared down at you panting.
You looked at the disheaved boy infront of you, you couldn't help but let out a breathy chuckle as he panted.
"S'good as always" You smiled, sitting up as you pecked his lips.
Art leaned forward, kissing you deeper as his hand snaked around your neck, pulling you closer as he kissed you. You hummed softly, your tongue swiping over his lips as the kiss grew more heated.
Before the pair of you could even consider a second round a loud string of knocks banged against the door.
The two of you pulled away and froze. Your hand pressed against his chest, your other frozen as you stroked his cock. His hands cupping your face as the pair of you just stared at each other.
After a while no knocks were heard so you were going to continue till another string of loud knocks.
"Fuck" You hissed as the pair of you both stood up, grabbing your clothes as you tried to quickly dress.
Your dress nowhere to be seen amongst the large pile of clothes. "Art where the fuck is my dress-" You whispered shouted.
"Shhh!-" He quipped. You grabbed his dress shirt he was wearing off the floor and threw it on over your underwear. He was scrambling around the room looking for his shirt when he looked at you wearing it.
He quickly pulled on his trousers and opened his wardrobe for a tshirt as he stumbled to the door. You stood behind him.
You don't know what you both expected or who you expected to be behind the door. But the colour drained from both of your faces as the door revealed your two friends.
"I texted you Y/N that we were outside 10 minutes ago but I can see you were occupied" Tashi raises her eyebrow, a sickly smirk across her face.
You gulped as you stared at her, smiling awkwardly.
"Tash- did you figure out where Y/N was-" Patrick's voice could be heard down the hall as he gained closer to the door. Stopping behind Tashi as he stared at you and Art. "Fucking knew it" He laughed.
If you enjoyed this fic and want to buy me a coffee, you can do so here!
#challengers#challengers art donaldson#art donaldson#art donaldson x reader#art x reader#art donaldson smut#tashi duncan#patrick zweig#mike faist#angelfrombenethfics
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the things we do for love
summary: secrets can never be kept for long. eventually, the truth always comes out, and so do the consequences of it.
warnings: mentions of blood, pregnancy, birth, fight, death; there's a flashback scene in the middle.
pairings: helion x reader (platonic); inner circle x reader (platonic)
words: 7.6k
you are a scholar from day court. but you are not just a simple scholar — you are the best.
you were known for graduating at the top of your class and for your impeccable reputation of never failing a project and never leaving a question unanswered.
you have always been a very curious person, and the fact that you grew up in day court gave you the privilege of having access to the best libraries with the best books in prythian.
that's why books were your life and the fact you liked to have an answer for everything, even though helion called you a know-it-all from time to time, and even if that irritated you a little, it was true.
whenever a question arose that you didn't know the answer to, you made it your personal mission to find one.
even if it meant having to read dozens, if not hundreds of books, but that part you never care about.
besides, the libraries were your favorite places, especially the one near the pegasus stables.
the only thing you liked more than books was pegasus.
you thought they were the most magnificent creatures your eyes had ever had the pleasure of seeing.
your favorite was meallan, who was also helion's favorite — it was with him that you learned to ride a pegasus, and he was your favorite partner to fly and enjoy the sky.
besides being curious, you were also a very adventurous person, and it was your sense of adventure that got you into trouble.
one day, you decided that it would be a great idea to combine the two things you love most in this world — books and pegasus.
so you tried flying with meallan while reading one of your romance books, only to get distracted when the scenery in the book started to heat up and lose your balance.
your luck? meallan wasn't flying very high when it happened.
your bad luck? a broken leg and a very big and angry lecture from helion.
when he heard what you did, he banned you from flying with meallan or any of the other pegasus again for months.
which led you to focus on books again for a while, which helped a lot during your recovery.
your reputation caught rhysand's attention.
the high lord of the night court was in the middle of researching the cauldron.
rumors about hybern being in search of it for a new war had reached his ears, and as all high lords should, he began to prepare for war but the truth is that his library could not be compared with those at day court.
even with the help of the priestesses, he was unable to find almost anything.
that's where you entered the equation.
during a meeting between the night court and day court at helion's palace, rhysand mentioned your name.
helion wasn't surprised.
he knew very well what you were capable of, and in that moment, he couldn't hide the pride he felt for you.
he knew what rhysand was about to ask of him.
he wanted you to join him and his inner circle in velaris and help with the research, and if possible, bring some books from your court on the subject for them to read as well.
helion had no problem with you helping them, afterall rhysand was one of his longest friends.
the only thing he didn't like was putting you in the enemy's attention.
if hybern found out, you'd have a target on your back.
helion explained his worries to the high lord of the night court and his inner circle that were seated beside him.
he explained to them how you were not just another citizen of his court.
you were important and very close to him.
he told them how your mother was one of his best friends for centuries, and when she died, he took you under his care.
the night court assured him that they would treat you like family and that they would not let anything bad happen to you.
before helion could respond, your voice filled the conference room, "i'll do it."
all the heads turned in your direction, helion leaned back in his chair and ran a hand over his face, "how many times do I have to tell you not to eavesdrop?"
with an innocent smile, you replied, "i wasn't eavesdropping. i was passing by, and i heard my name."
"really? you were just passing by?" helion didn't believe you for a second.
the inner circle watched the scene unfold in front of them with amusement in their faces.
"hm-hm" was your response.
helion interlaced his hands and with an amused look — one that you knew very well and that meant he was about to corner you — "and where were you going, if i may ask?"
"i. . .hm, i-" you paused to think, before an idea came to your mind "ah, i was going to the kitchen. yes, that's where i was going."
helion chuckled, "the same kitchen that is on the other side of the palace, and you can't access it from this floor?"
your smile fell, and you realized you had been caught.
he was right, this floor was for political purposes only — helion's office, the conference room they were in now, an armament room and the map room which was mainly used by helion's general and his soldiers.
everyone tried to contain their laughter at your expression and when you tried to come up with a quick response and couldn't, you decided to admit defeat.
"okay, okay, i wasn't just passing by. what do you want me to say? you know i'm curious."
"indeed, i do." he gave you a smile.
raising from his seat, he gestured for you to approach him, and when you did, he wrapped you in a side hug. "y/n, meet the inner circle."
you couldn't help but linger your gaze on the shadowsinger. he was stupidly handsome, and no one should look that good.
the laughter caught your attention, and when you looked at them, you noticed that everyone was smiling except helion.
realizing what had just happened, you said, "shit, did i just say that out loud?" a hand coming to cover your mouth that was starting to form into a nervous smile.
"unfortunately," helion replied with a roll of his eyes.
another thing you were also, besides being curious and adventurous — is being honest.
you are not, and you have never been afraid to say what you think and be direct about it.
helion has always really liked that trait of yours but not at the moment, especially when you're using it to flirt with the male in front of you.
"okay, enough." he averted his gaze to azriel, "stop looking at her like that before i regret all of this."
the shadowsinger raised his hand in surrender with a smile playing on his lips.
helion released a sigh before looking at you. "are you sure about this? you don't have to do it if you don't want to."
you gave him an assured smile, "i'm sure, i can do this. besides, it's what i was trained for, right?"
the word 'trained' led you to another thought, one that helion wasn't very fond of "oh, can you train me while i'm there?" you asked the general.
cassian was surprised by the question. no one ever asked him to train them before, and if they did, it wouldn't be a female.
that made him feel a strange sensation in his chest, one that he wasn't used to. was it, pride?
"of course," he had no problem in saying.
"awesome. i'm going to pack my things." you gave them one last smile before exiting the room.
with the door shutting behind you, helion turned to his old friend, "alright. rhysand, i'm trusting you, all of you, with her. so. . .do not fail me. unless you would like to see me very angry." helion added a little of enfase with his high lord voice.
rhysand chuckled at his words, but he knew the male meant every single one of them "we won't."
helion turned to cassian, "oh, and cassian? be careful when you eventually put a weapon on y/n's hands. she's a little curious and clumsy even though she never lost or ruined a book, which is kinda of a surprise, actually."
cassian laughed while crossing his amra over his chest, "it can't be that bad."
helion gave them a nervous laugh before telling them one of your many stories.
"i once tried to teach her archery because she was interested and when i was teaching her how to shoot an arrow, she got distracted with a butterfly that was flying near her and the arrow that was supposed to go into the target, end up going into one of the gardener's legs. who, by the way, was on the other side of the garden."
cassian's smile dropped, and he's arms fell to the side.
everyone else laughed, if it was at your story or at his reaction, cassian didn't know.
"oh, this is going to be fun," morrigan said with a "i already like her," followed by amren.
"no weapons, got it." cassian said before starting to re-think about his life's choices.
•••
you were finishing packing when helion entered your bedroom chambers.
"everything okay?" he asked you.
"yes, i already have everything i need."
you turned to look at him and when you saw his worried look, you gave him a gentle smile "don't worry. i'm going to be fine."
"i know," he reciprocated the smile and approached you.
his hands fond your shoulders and he gave them a tight squeeze "remember, no one can know. it needs to remain a secret."
"yes, i know. i'm not going to tell them." you promised.
"good," helion gave your shoulders one last squeeze before letting them go, "now, have fun but please be careful with the weapons during training with cassian. we wouldn't want you to lose a finger."
"or him," you added, making you and helion laugh.
"or him," he repeated your words with a chuckle, "also, don't forget our agreement," helion reminded you with a stern look.
you rolled your eyes but with a chuckle escaping your lips, "i know."
"four letters during the week," he said while smiling at your antics, warmth in his eyes "deal?"
"deal."
•••
everything was going well.
you had been at the night court for about three months now and the research about the cauldron and hybern had progressed a lot with your help.
you loved velaris and adjusted very well but instead of staying with the inner circle, like rhysand offered, you decided to rent a house near the sidra so you could explore the city of starlight at your own pace.
and because you never lived alone before and decided to try it — 'a new adventure' that's what you wrote to helion in the letter.
he didn't liked it.
you also did that, so you had a reason for the shadowsinger to fly you to the house of wind and then back to yours —but you decide to leave that little detail out of the letter.
the library at the house of wind made you feel at home and helped with your homesickness.
the priestesses adored you and found your presence comforting. the only thing they didn't like very much was when you disappeared for a few hours and they had to alert the inner circle.
they found you on the last floor of the library drinking tea while talking to bryaxis much to cassian's dismay.
when they asked you about it you blamed your curiosity — you had heard some priestesses talking about the creature that lived in the library while searching for a book.
you went to the edge of the stairs and when you looked down, you found nothing, and you needed to know what this creature was like so your feet started moving before you could stop them.
you end up finding that bryaxis was really good at telling stories and you thought he was friendly.
cassian didn't liked it.
you were doing remarkable work, rhysand had complimented you multiple times for it.
you were respecting the agreement and sending four letters as agreed and cassian still had all his fingers and toes but the same couldn't be said about the ear he almost lost when you got distracted during sword training.
two months without any incident — or almost.
but that changed the day a letter from the night court arrived ar helion's office.
•••
helion never winnowed so fast as he did when he received the letter from rhysand explaining about what happened to you.
the moment helion set a foot on the night court's ground, he was quick to make his way to rhysand and grab him by the colar of his shirt.
"what the hell happened?" he yelled.
rhysand's eyes widened, never in his four hundred years of friendship, had he seen his friend reacting like this.
rhysand told him everything.
how you didn't show up in the library this morning and clotho noticed your absence.
how no one had seen you since last night and after checking if you were in the library or the rooftop training which you weren't, they decided to come to your house to check on you.
how they found the door of your house open and when they check the inside. . .
the house was destroyed.
broken furniture, paintings lying on the floor, shattered objects, torn cushions and then, blood.
not just yours but also whoever invaded.
apparently, training with cassian had worked, because you put up a good fight to the invaders.
and then there were the scents.
the scent of qutumn soldiers.
at least five different scents lingered in the air but they were starting to disappear so they suspected you had been taken at least two hours ago.
and when the explanation ended, helion finally released his friend's shirt and took a step back.
helion panicked.
you kidnapped?
autumn soldiers?
helion knew what this meant.
he had found out the truth and came for you.
all the emotions started overwhelming helion — anger, worry, fear, rage.
this couldn't be happening.
it couldn't be true.
helion leaned over to try to ease the pain he felt in his chest.
but it didn't work.
raising his head, the inner circle watched as helion's golden eyes darkened — anger.
he was going to find you, and he was going to bring you home — to him.
even if it meant he would have to destroy the autumn court with his bare hands, like he did once, to some beasts, centuries ago.
"don't worry, helion, we're going to find your scholar," rhysand promised him.
"she's not just my scholar!" the high lord of day shouted.
he shouted so loud that the birds that were posing on the trees nearby flew away as fast as their wings allowed.
feyre moved forward and placed her hand on helion's arm, trying to comfort him as much as she could, "what do you mean by that?"
helion met the high lady's eyes, and all she found in them was pain and fear.
his lip trembled, and after taking a few deep breaths, he told her the truth.
the truth that no one was prepared for.
"she's my daughter."
the inner circle stilled at his words. for a few moments the only sounds heard, was their breathings.
this was unknown to them, helion had never mentioned a child of his own.
"y/n is my daughter, and she's the princess of the day court."
before any of them had the chance to say something, helion raised his hand and signaled his second in command to approach him.
the male had refused to let his high lord come alone after reading that letter "benjen."
benjen approached him and stood to his full height, ready to receive his orders. "yes, high lord?
"i need you to send a letter to rris, tell him what happened and that he needs to come to velaris as soon as he can."
helion paused for a second, very well aware of the gazes the inner circle were sending his way, "and also tell him not to show the letter to anyone, as soon as he finishes reading it, he must burn it immediately."
"of course, high lord." bejen replied and gave a small nod before leaving to carry out his order.
at the exit of one of his most trusted friends, helion looked turned to face the inner circle, and he only had a second to breathe before the shadowsinger spoke.
"why are you sending a letter to eris? What does he have to do with y/n?" he asked him, with worry and confusion on his face.
if autumn had really captured you, he didn't want to waste another minute.
"everything."
tired of his riddles, rhysand spoke, from one high lord to another.
"helion, tell us what's going on? how is y/n your daughter, and why did i never know about it?"
"how is eris connected to her? and why has she taken by autumn soldiers?" cassian added.
helion released a long breath and pitched the bridge of his nose.
he approached his old friend, and with a stern look and a firm voice, he said, "if i tell you, rhysand. . .you and your inner circle can't tell anyone."
rhysand looked back, and with the firm nods of his family, he returned his look to helion before extending his hand to him "i promise."
helion took his hand, and a bargain was made.
a tattoo in the shape of the sun appeared on the back of their necks.
helion gave him a nod before telling him, "y/n's mother didn't die, and she wasn't just a random lover."
the inner circle approached at the sound of the new information the spell cleaver was sharing them.
they formed a circle around helion, as if the keep the information within it.
"y/n is the result of an affair that i had eighty-two years ago."
helion paused, aware of what he was about to say. once his words came out, he couldn't go back.
"she's mine and elowyn's daughter."
several gasps were heard out loud. they froze in their place's with shock spreading through their features.
oh, this was bad.
this was very bad.
"you mean. . .?" feyre wasn't able to finish her sentence, too afraid to say it.
"yes." he said, his eyes locked on the high lady's blue ones, "the lady of autumn is her mother."
helion sighed, and turned with his back facing them "we kept it a secret all these years so beron wouldn't find out, but apparently, he has."
helion took a step back and passed a hand through his long black hair. "that's how y/n is connected to eris. he's her older brother."
mor spoke for the first time since all of this happened. "but how does he know?"
helion looked at her. "because eris was the one who brought y/n to me on the day she was born."
•••
eight-two years ago
the sun had left a long time ago.
the night had already come with it's dark sky, shiny stars, and smooth breeze.
the entire prythian was thankful for it.
every citizen from every court just wanted today's day to end.
no one understood or had an explanation for the events of today.
it didn't make sense.
prythian was in the height of winter — two weeks from the Winter Solstice to be more precise.
and even though the seasonal courts didn't follow the natural course of nature, they, too, were affected.
during the entire day, the sun shined like it had never shined before, releasing an unbearable heat that prythian had never felt before.
not even the summer court or the day court have had a sun like that before.
and these were the two courts best known for their warm suns.
even winter court, known for it's constant cold, and it's land always decorated with snow and ice felt uncomfortable with the sun.
nothing happened differently during the course of today's day to explain the reaction from the sun.
there was no reason for it.
except, there was, they just didn't know that.
—
the letter came a few minutes after helion had finished his dinner.
he, too, was contemplating about the sun's behavior earlier.
he even made his way to one of his many libraries to see if this event had ever happened before but he found nothing.
it wasn't strange for the sun to shine like it did today.
they've had their fair share of hot summers but for the sun to shine like that during the winter?
that didn't make sense.
and with all the libraries and even more the books he owned, there had to be an answer somewhere.
the high lord of day was in the middle of reading a book when the letter appeared on top of it.
the letter had brown tones with leaf patterns and an intense scent of pine — Autumn.
that was the second strange thing that happened today.
why — of all the Courts — would autumn be sending him a letter?
it was then that he noticed that the letter did not come from beron.
the stamped seal did not belong to the high lord.
no, the seal was in the shape of a hound.
the heir's beloved creatures and personal seal.
eris Vanserra sent him a letter — a personal letter.
without further hesitation, helion opened the letter and read the content hidden within.
if he was confused before, he is even more now.
the letter contained three simple instructions: "meet me at the border between day and dawn in twenty minutes. come alone and don't let anyone see you. burn the letter once you finish reading it."
now, this was even stranger than the sun's behavior.
—
helion knew that he was most likely making a mistake.
meeting eris alone at the border could very well be a trap, but on second thought, what reason did the heir have to ambush him?
the answer was none.
he knew that eris was not the cruel and arrogant male he appeared to be.
he knew that deep down eris was good, honest and kind and that the rest was nothing more than a mask that he had created because of beron.
that's why helion followed his instructions.
he just hoped he didn't regret it.
as agreed, eris appeared exactly twenty minutes after sending the letter.
the high lord of day decided to arrive a little earlier as a precaution, just to make sure there were no hidden hounds ready to attack his legs, especially today that he was wearing a new robe.
helion had no idea what this secret meeting was about.
he came to think that perhaps the heir was moments away from asking him for help to take down beron, but he came to the conclusion that if that were the case, it wasn't him that eris would ask for help, but the night court, so he scrapped that idea and was left with no other.
therefore, he had no expectations for this meeting — if it could be called that.
but the last thing he expected was to see eris vanserra with a newborn in his arms.
—
the day was already feeling long, but with the sun shining like that and the unbearable heat that came from it, it only made it seem even longer.
elowyn, lady of the autumn court, had now been in labor for three hours.
the eighth child of beron vanserra and elowyn was about to come into the world.
and like all the other births, beron was far away from the room where his wife was.
but eris was there.
just like he was at all the births of his younger brothers, holding his mother's hand like he always did.
eris loved his mother more than anything, and one of the reasons he wanted to overthrow beron so much was so she could be free and happy.
he also knew that lucien was her favorite son, and although it hurt him, he would still do anything for her.
but what was unknown to eris was that he was her favorite son too.
eris was surprised when his mother announced that she was pregnant again.
after all, lucien had born more than four hundred years ago.
another brother was something that the young heir wasn't expecting.
but he couldn't not be happy.
besides he always liked taking care of his brothers when they were younger, and after everything that happened maybe a baby was exactly what they needed.
as his mother pushed again, eris began to think about all the things he was going to teach the new member of the family — fishing, hunting, fighting, reading, writing, camping but most importantly how to control his powers.
that was something eris didn't have.
no one taught him how to control and use his fire, and that led the healers to treat a lot of burns because of it, and he wasn't going to let this baby go through what he did.
his mother's scream shook him away from those thoughts, and Eris refocused all his attention on her and made sure to hold her hand tighter, assuring his mother that he wasn't going anywhere.
not until his brother was born.
two hours later, after many screams, pain, and sweat — a baby's cries burst into the room, bringing tears of happiness to the eyes of elowyn and eris.
but it was at that moment that the mother made her first turn of events.
"it's a girl, my lady," the head healer that was helping with the labor announced "a very healthy baby girl."
eris froze, not knowing how to react before this new information.
in over a thousand years, the vanserra lineage had never had female descendants.
this couldn't be possible.
"a girl?" elowyn asked, exhaustion in her voice.
"yes, my lady." one of the healers that assisted with the birth and now holding the baby confirmed while walking closer to the bed.
"it looks like you've been blessed, my lady."
eris's grip on his mother's hand loosened, and the male stood up from the side of the bed where he had spent the last five hours crouched.
now raised to his full height, eris saw his baby sister, and his heart stopped.
and that was when the mother made her second turn of events.
the baby didn't look like eris or his mother or anyone in his family.
her hair wasn't red, her eyes weren't russet or brown, and her skin wasn't pale.
she wasn't a daughter of autumn.
meaning she wasn't beron's daughter.
eris took the baby from the healer's arms before speaking to all of them. "leave us."
the head healer asked before making her exit, "should we announce the birth to the high lord, my prince?"
"no," eris was quick to respond.
he looked at the baby in his arms again before meeting the gaze of the female. "i'll tell him myself when he gets back from the meeting. thank you for your help."
"of course, my prince." the healer turned to face elowyn and bowed one more time before leaving the room "my lady."
elowyn gave her a small smile. "thank you, lydia."
now alone in the room, eris finally looked at his mother and took a seat on her left side of the bed, and passed the baby to her arms.
at the sight of her daughter, elowyn cried.
she knew what this meant.
beron was going to kill her and her child.
her love affair had ended after becoming pregnant with lucien, but after seeing helion at the high lords meeting three years ago, all the feelings that she had buried deep down in her heart came to the surface.
and as always, she wasn't able to stay away from the male she's always loved — the love of her life, her mate, and now the father of two of her children.
elowyn ran her fingers over the delicate cheek of her daughter — her only daughter.
and with tears running down her face, she looked at her firstborn and said to him in a low voice "he's going to kill us, isn't he?"
it was eris's turn to have tears in his eyes, but he didn't let them fall.
placing one of his fingers in front of his little sister, eris saw the baby wrap her small hand around his finger, and he could have sworn his heart skipped a beat at the gesture.
he had a gentle smile on his lips as he looked at the newborn now sleeping in his mother's arms.
her hand still wrapped around her big brother's finger.
"she's Helion's, isn't she?" eris asked without taking his eyes from the baby.
elowyn's mouth opened in surprise.
she never mentioned helion to anyone, not even to lydia who wasn't just the court's head healer but also her dearest friend.
"wha-"
"it's okay, mom. i have known for a while." eris gave her a small smile, eyes still directed to his sister.
"since when?"
"since lucien," eris finally looked at his mother.
eris gave a long sigh before revealing his opinion to his mother "if you would like to know, i wish you had married him and not Beron, even if that meant i would never been born."
eris grabbed her hand and give it a tight squeeze before continuing "you deserve to be happy and well treated, mom, and i know that helion does that and so much more. i've never seen you as happy as on the days you returned from your encounters with him."
elowyn gave him a genuine smile before murmuring a small "thank you," she had no idea her son was aware of this.
eris chuckled, now putting the two pieces together, "this is why the sun is acting like crazy today, isn't it? because she's a child of day.
the same had happened with Lucien but it wasn't as strong as today and lucien was born in the summer which didn't raise any suspicions.
his mother nodded her head in affirmation before returning her eyes to her daughter, smiling, "she looks just like him."
and it was true.
everything about you screamed helion — your eyes, your hair, your skin, and even your nose.
there was no doubt in it.
concerned invaded her face, and elowyn found herself holding the baby tighter to her chest.
she looked at her son again, "what are we going to do?"
eris met her gaze before looking at the peaceful baby again, and his head started to work to come up with a plan.
even if you weren't beron's you were still his sister — his baby sister — and he wasn't going to let that horrible male harm you.
after a few minutes and after thinking about all the possible ways, eris understood there was only one option — one that he hated.
but that didn't matter.
what mattered was to keep you safe and alive even if it meant to send you away.
the tears returned to his eyes.
he had to swallow the lump in his throat because he knew he was about to break his mother's heart.
after breathing for a few seconds to calm his heart, he gathered enough courage to tell her, "i have a plan."
and just like that, the mother made her third and final turn of events.
—
the High Lord of Day couldn't believe what was in front of him.
eris vanserra with a newborn in his arms?
things had just gotten far more interesting or dangerous.
the heir of autumn was walking in his direction and looking at his surroundings while doing it.
when he finally stood in front of the high lord, eris asked him, "are you alone?"
with an annoyed look, helion raised his arm to gesture around them, "do you see anyone else here, prince?"
"as far as i'm concerned, you could have soldiers hiding behind the trees ready to attack me at your signal, high lord." eris gave a sarcastic smile.
helion reciprocated his smile while adding, "i could say the same about you."
eris shrugged his shoulders and concluded, "i suppose that's true."
helion winked at him before his eyes moved to the baby in his arms.
trying to act as normal as possible and not let his curiosity take the better of him, helion asked "who's this little one? and why would you bring a baby here?"
helion didn't have a good view of you, only of the top of your head since the rest was hidden by the blanket.
at the question, eris held you tighter in his arms, he looked to the high lord, who was still busy staring at you, probably trying to get a better look.
he wanted to see his reaction when he revealed the truth to him.
"this is my sister. she was born a few hours ago." the Heir said and moved the blanket so helion could finally see you.
when eris removed the blanket and helion finally had a good view of you, confusion settled on his features.
the spell cleaver's features scoffed before telling him, "she's your sister?"
eris nodded before helion continued. "i hate to be the one telling you this, eris, but she looks noth-"
you opened your eyes at the sound of his voice, making the high lord of day freeze in his place.
helion stopped.
his heart did, too.
realization entered him as he put the pieces together.
he raised his head to look at the redheaded male who only gave a nod of affirmation as his response.
helion had to blink his eyes several times to make sure that he wasn't dreaming — that this was real.
you looked just like him.
"it's not possible." helion said, more to himself than to the young heir
"it is. she's the living proof of that." eris told him.
helion's eyes widened in disbelief, "the sun?" he murmured.
"yes," eris confirmed as he passed one of his fingers through your cheek.
helion couldn't tear his eyes from.
you were looking at him with your big golden eyes — his eyes.
he felt weak in his knees.
helion always wanted children, he knew that since the moment he met elowyn but the world hadn't been kind to them.
by the Cauldron, he didn't even know elowyn was pregnant.
the last time they had seen each other was a little over ten months ago, but sometimes that happened, it had happened before.
when Beron was around a lot, it was difficult for her to leave without lifting any suspicions, so they would wait until she could.
sometimes it took weeks, other times mouths, but helion was patient, he would rather wait than risk her safety at beron's rage.
but the wait was worthed because when they were together it was like the rest of the world disappeared and it was just the two of them.
it was perfect.
the room was lit by the first rays of the morning sun and a gentle breeze came through the window.
the two lovers were together in bed. after a long night of passion and romance, the two were in each other's arms with nothing but a sheet protecting them from the breeze.
elowyn laughed again at the tickling sensation.
she hit helion's arm that was holding her against his chest "stop", but she couldn't stop laughing.
"why would i do that when i can hear that magnificent sound?" helion joined her laugh.
but helion was right.
elowyn only laughed when she was with him, and that was one of the reasons why she loved him so much.
the lady rested her head on the high lord's chest and released a long sigh before giving voice to her thoughts, "i wish i woke up like this every morning."
she adjusted her head on the male's chest so she could look at him,"with you."
helion lowered his head to meet her beautiful brown eyes, a sad smile taking over him, "me too."
"do you ever think about that? about how our life would be if we were together?" she asked him.
"of course i do," he placed a hand on her hair and began to caress it as he spoke "the first thing i would do, would be to marry you and after making you my wife, i would make you my high lady."
a smile began to form on her lips, "ehat else?"
he reciprocated the smile and continued, "afterwards, we would have our honeymoon at the summer court because i know how much you would like to visit there. and then, i would show you every place of your new Court. the libraries, the pegasus, the entire palace and my favorite places."
he paused for a second, sadness starting to make its way to his features again "i would make you feel like home, and i would make you feel loved, seen and heard every single day. i would give you anything you asked of me, sunshine."
a tear fell from elowyn's eyes, and her lip trembled a little, "that sounds perfect. ot would be a dream come true."
helion wiped her tears and told her "yes, it would be. . ." he gave her a weak smile.
he, too, felt the pain of what they could only imagine."would you like to hear the best part?"
when she nodded her head, he proceeded "after a few years of being married, if we were blessed enough and if you wanted, of course," he paused, "children."
elowyn didn't know what to say.
she had confessed to helion a long time ago how she wished she had run away from her family and married him instead of her current husband.
how she wished she had been strong enough to stand up to her father and how she wished all her sons were his.
because this last confession was what held her back in autumn, she was not capable of abandoning her sons and leaving them at the mercy of beron.
she couldn't wait for the day when eris killed him so she could finally be what she always wanted — lady of the day court but in this case she would be high lady as helion had told her and she didn't doubt for a second of his words.
but unlike helion, the first thing she would do, wouldn't be to marry him but to accept the mating bond.
that beautiful, golden, and magical mating bond.
she tugged on the bond and a second later helion did the same.
finding the words she was looking for she said to him "of course i would have children with you, helion. that's not even a question."
she giggled, "can you imagine? little versions of you and me running around and causing trouble?"
helion couldn't hold back the laughter that escaped at her words "they would be troublemakers, wouldn't they?"
elowyn laughed even more "of course they would be."
her laughter quieted and a hint of love adorned her face "maybe i would finally have my little girl. i always wanted a daughter."
"me too," helion confessed, "i would name her after my mother in honor of her."
"your mother was a remarkable female. it would be an honor to name our little sunshine after her," she said and dropped an arm around his waist.
"it would be my greatest achievement.'' he gave her a kiss on the forehead.
they spent the rest of the morning in bed talking about the future they wanted more than anything and expressed their love one more time until elowyn had to leave.
what they didn't know at the moment was that it was the last time they would see each other for a really long time.
the memory surged through helion's mind like a wave.
he remembers that day so well after all that day was only ten months ago.
what a coincidence that on the last day they were together they talked about their future and their children and now, right in front of him, was their daughter.
their little sunshine.
with a trembling voice, helion spoke after a long time in silence "can i hold her?"
"of course," eris was quick to answer,passing you to your father's arms.
and that's when it happened.
a moment that neither helion nor eris would ever forget.
in the second that you were in helion's arms, both of your skins started glowing as bright as the sun had just a few hours ago.
the day court glow.
"wow," eris whispered, amazed at what was happening.
"indeed, she really is mine," without taking his eyes from you, helion asked "what's her name?"
"y/n," Eris answered still observing the glow.
once again, the high lord froze on his spot.
his heart started beating faster.
seeing the strange reaction from helion, eris spoke "what is it?"
helion looked at the male with a smile "that's my mother's name. i told elowyn once how if i ever had a daughter, i would want to name her after her."
eris smiled at the kindness of his mother but he wasn't surprised, she was always like that.
"elowyn," the high lord of day whispered.
locking his gaze with the red-headed male, concern all written in his features at the well-being of the female he had been in love for centuries.
he was so focused on you that he didn't remember to ask this earlier, "elowyn. how is she? is she alright?"
eris released a long sigh, "physically? she's fine but exhausted from the birth. emotionally? she's a wreck, but i suppose that's normal considering her only daughter has to be sent away."
"what?"
"that's why i sent you that letter, helion. i came to bring her to you." eris said, a firm look on his face.
"she can't stay in autumn. no matter how much i want." he murmured the last part to himself, but if Helion noticed he didn't show.
"no one can know about her, about who her mother really is, we need to keep this from away from beron's ears."
he nodded his head, agreeing with the young heir.
of course, you couldn't stay there. he didn't even want to imagine what beron would do if he found out about you.
at the thought of the horrible male, confusion settled on his face again, "wait, what about beron? certainly, he's going to notice that his supposed child is missing."
"don't worry about beron, i took care of it." eris tried to be as vague as possible.
"how?"
"you don't want to know, besides that's not important right now. she is." he gestured to you, your skin still glowing and now grabbing one of helion's fingers.
eris gave a long breath, and then directed his gaze to you just for a second before raising it again to the high lord "are you going to take her?"
helion scoffed, "what kind of question it's that?"
eris released a long breath of relief, and a weight had been lifted from his shoulders.
he didn't doubt that the mal3 would refuse you, but he couldn't but be nervous at the same.
the heir reached for the inside pocket of his coat and removed a letter, and helion took his gaze from you to look at it.
"my mother wrote this for you. she told me to tell you to only read it once you're back home," he handed him the letter.
helion's heart ached at the revelation of elowyn calling his court 'home'.
he accepted the letter and thanked the red-headed male, starting making his way to leave.
but before he could, he stopped at the voice of the heir calling for him.
he turned around to face him.
"i want to be part of her life," eris confessed without hesitation.
"what? we just agreed that no one can know about her, eris, and that includes you. she can't know you're her brother." helion explained.
"i know that," seeing the confused look Helion gave him, it was his turn to explain.
"she doesn't need to know me as her brother. a friend will be enough." he paused for a second, "beron just nominated me as autumn's emissary which means i will be the one going to your court for meetings so i want to take that as an opportunity to get to know her and to see her grow. that's my only condition, i already lost lucien, and i'm not going to lose her either.'
"very well, as long as you share those moments with elowyn. that's my only condition too," helion replied.
"consider it done."
without further words, the two males parted away.
one with a heart full and the other with an empty one.
•••
present
helion's heart was no longer full.
how could it be, when you, the best thing that ever happened to him was missing?
he saw the inner circle's face at the big revelation he had just told them.
rhysand broke the silence "why didn't you tell me? i could've helped you."
helion met his gaze, "i couldn't risk it. y/n is my number one priority, and she'll always be, so i did everything i had to do in order to keep her safe. i have no regrets."
feyre interlaced her fingers with rhysand's, asking the high lord, "does she know?"
"only that she's my daughter. she doesn't know about elowyn or eris and the rest of her brothers."
"she never mentioned anything," mor replied.
"i told her not to. y/n knows that she's my weakness and that if my enemies knew about her connection to me, they would use it as leverage. so i made sure no one outside of day knew it, except eris and elowyn, not even her other brothers knew it." helion explained.
"not even lucien?" feyre asked, feeling sorry for her friend.
"no, not even him."
"so how did Beron find out?" azriel said, interrupting their conversation.
"i don't-" helion started, but before he could continue, the autumn heir arrived.
as soon as Eris' eyes met helion's, he marched towards him.
the heir was angry, and he didn't spare a glance at the inner circle.
"where is she?" eris demanded and his heart dropped when he saw the state of the house.
when eris's eyes settle on everyone, all they saw was desperation and fear in his eyes.
"where is my sister?!"
a/n: thank you for reading!
taglist: @emryb @fantasyandshit @azrielover @shadowsingercassia @brieflyclassymortal @lilah-asteria @lure-of-writing @pruvii @olive-main @mybestfriendmademe
*if you asked to be tagged and you weren't, it's because I couldn't find your blog.
the beautiful dividers belong to @cafekitsune
#acotar#acotar fandom#azriel#azriel shadowsinger#azriel x reader#cassian#inner circle#rhysand#feyre cursebreaker#morrigan acotar#amren acotar#high lord helion#helion acotar#helion spell cleaver#eris vanserra#eris acotar#lady of autumn#loa#morrigan#amren#lucien vanserra#acotar fic#acotar fanfiction
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Our Little Secret
Eris x Azriel's Twin! Reader
Summary: Azriel and his sister have always been opposites, she weaved light he bent shadows, he liked the dark and cold, she lived for warmth and light. That led her to Eris Vanserra. The two began secret but not so secret meetups that eventually blossoms into more.
Warnings: 18+, implied semi-graphic smut but not full scenes, attempted murder, injuries, blood, war, death, pregnancy, depression and self-doubt.
Word Count: 8,995
Notes: Shorter but sweet hope everyone enjoys some soft Eris!
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There were several pros and cons to being Eris’s mate and Azriel’s twin sister.
Pros included the ability to claim visits to Autumn as part of my spy job now that we were in an alliance with them as Eris began ascending the throne and needed assistance in weeding out the vermin that had invaded his fathers court.
Cons included that my brother absolutely hated the male, so any interactions we had were either secret or strictly professional in nature with others like my family around us.
However when the tides had turned after a rather eventful week tucked away in the halls of The Forest House, after an advisor had hired an assassin to try and take out Eris, neither Eris or I were prepared for the aftermath.
My brother was able to bend the shadows to his whim, he had always shrunk into the shadows and found peace in them after our half brothers had burned his hands. I however, was the opposite. My brothers and father had clipped my wings from birth, I would and have never known the call of the wind. Where my brother found comfort in the shadows I found my comfort in those small warm rays of light that would peek into our basement cell from the small barred window we were too short to reach. My brother had learned to weave the shadows to his whim, I had done the opposite and learned to weave the light to mine.
Where my brother hated and despised the now High Lord of the Autumn Court, I had come to love and cherish him. Especially when our spontaneous meetings became a regularly scheduled secret.
Eris and I had started at a dance, his piercing eyes had found mine as I stood on the dias with my brothers; he had approached with an eerily attractive atmosphere around him as he stalked up to me, he stood a step below me as he bowed and offered his hand out for a dance. Together we had taken the ball by storm all the onlookers had been mesmerized by the passion and fierceness in which Eris and I brought forward, we had both intrigued the other from the second we both came to an abrupt stop with the end of the pounding, loud, and energetic music and our chests were heaving as we panted trying to catch our breath.
That night had ignited something between us because later that same night he had sought me with the intention of making small chat to get closer, he had approached me with a champagne flute but by the end of it we had defected from the rest of the party and found ourselves rutting against each other in an empty conference room. That would be the first of many times we would end up hidden away in a backroom slotted against each other, just happy to have someone who’s passion matched our own.
It had simply become a normal thing for us, every high lords meeting and every alliance talk, we would wind up in each other without fail. As meetings continued his mask began to fall away and after we had both come undone and beads of sweat had started to form between us he would confess his fears or the things that had troubled him, a recent beating from Beron here or nerves from the threat of war looming over our heads.
When the war did come to a head, I had been using light to mask parts of our armies, rendering them invisible to Hybern and his own army; we ultimately prevailed but not without our own amount of casualties, Eris had come rushing towards the medical tents Beron tossed over the hind quarters of his horse. I had been sitting with Azriel and the rest of the inner circle, a healer stitching a spot on my arm where a sword had gone a little too deep for me to be comfortable with and wasn't healing quick enough for the healers to be comfortable with, when we heard the commotion. I could hear Eris screaming and the second the nurse cut the thread from my arm I was out of the tent, Eris was soaked in blood and trying to pull Beron off the back of his horse; I could hear the grief in his voice as much as the panic was obvious on his face, I helped Eris pull him down and a healer met us halfway to the tent. Just as Beron and the healer made it through the curtain Eris had dropped to his knees, adrenaline finally wearing off, he started crying so I dropped to my knees beside him and pulled him tight against me.
Once his sobs started to garner attention I motioned for him to stand and ushered him out of the way of the crowds into my tent. I pulled him into my chest, running my fingers through his hair while his sobs became hoarse and weak; the metallic smell of his father’s blood clung to him and I slowly stripped him from the stained garments, I grabbed the cloth that was draped over the edge of the small bowl filled with water for washing sat and began cleaning where the smears of blood lingered on his skin. As I dabbed at the blood his sniffling stopped and he stared down at where I kneeled to sponge at a spot on his hip, I looked up at him with a sad smile and his head dropped to let his hair curtain his face.
With one hand tucked into my hair he pulled me tight against his thigh and muttered a small barely audible “Thank you.”
Once I had finished cleaning him he sat on the edge of my bed, a small swirl of light nudged at his hands and he smiled as he let it caress him like how one of his hounds would have, as I was slipping out of my own blood stained clothing one of my light beams presented me with clothing from Eris’s own tent. He took them from the small beam with a smile and slipped on the comfortable night clothing, I slipped into my own comfortable sleeping clothes and climbed onto the bed beside him. He buried himself into my chest and curled around me, I wrapped one wing over the top of us and we laid there for a few minutes before he gave out a shaky breath. He began to tell me how he had found Beron and he fully believed it was his fault the older male had been injured, Eris had left his position in the Autumn Court squadron to meet with Helion and the rest of us on the opposite side of the battlefield, leaving Beron exposed. Apparently somehow Beron and his brothers had been ambushed, the rest of his remaining brothers were dead but Beron was unconscious and breathing; as he moved to check Beron’s wounds he had realized the older male was beginning to bleed out and hauled him up to the horse, someone managing to get him on the beast.
I soothed him, telling him it wasn’t his fault, that the mother had a sick sense of karma; and that was all this was, karma, for his actions towards Eris and his family. We fell asleep an hour or so later, Eris’s soft snores lulling me into my own sleep. It was around midnight when I felt the bed shift, the smell in my tent stung my nose: a sharp Cinnamon and smoke mixed with a spice that reminded me of the autumn court alcohol Eris had given me after one of our usual meetups. It was Eris’s comforting scent amplified a hundred times over, it was only when my eyes adjusted to the darkness and I saw Eris sat up elbows on his knees and hunched over that I realized the stinging was caused by a surplus of magic in the air.
“He’s dead” Was all Eris mumbled as he looked back over his shoulder at me.
Only then did I get a good look at him, his ears seemed more pointed, his eyes more predatorial and enticing, every detail about him that I had noticed before was amplified; from the red of his hair to the freckles that littered the bridge of his nose, I felt myself fall more in love with him with every detail I took in.
“Don’t look at me like that starlight.” A low growl from his voice had goosebumps growing over my skin and every hair standing on end all at the same time.
I couldn't even mumble an apology to the newly made high lord before his eyes widened and his scent thickened with the added addition of his arousal. In a split second he had pounced on me, his lips finding their home on my neck. We spent the rest of the night lost in eachother, he was clearly rougher and more feral with the newly found energy and stamina that had come with becoming a high lord.
Our bond had only grown from there, after the war was over he had asked Rhys for help in discovering which of those in his court wanted his downfall or were members of the illegal markets his father had let the Autumn Court become home to. The Autumn Court was bright at all times of the day, between the actual sun in the day and the fireflies and bonfires that lit up the night, I had been sent to act as Emissary and spy. It had started as miniscule tasks like tracking down and destroying supply carts carrying black market goods or stalking through the castle under my invisible illusion to listen in on private conversations that could have been conspiratorial in nature. It was one of these overheard conversations that sent me rushing to Eris’s room, heart pounding so rapidly I felt it in the back of my throat.
It was late in the evening, Eris would have retired from the throne room or his study and would have been in his private chambers getting ready to wind down for the night, I slipped from the perch where I had heard the alarming news and found the faintest crack of light under Eris’s door; the faintest amount I needed leaked from the door as the lights in the hall began to dim, much like how my brother used the shadows to transport him around I used the light to step silently into Eris’s chambers. The fireplace, the thing illuminating the room so brightly, crackled softly and I took the faintest step forward towards Eris.
He turned quickly, dressed only in a pair of loose trousers with his hair half up and cascading over his shoulders; he had grown it out since becoming high lord. “Starlight? What's wrong, why do you look so panicked? What did you hear?”
“Eris! You have got to be wary! I heard two of the advisors conspiring together to assassinate you! They spoke not of when it was planned but it is coming!” I took a few steps towards him reaching out to grasp at his upper arm, an attempt to convey my desperation to him.
“Thank you Starlight, but remember they know not of your spying capabilities, I have no evidence against them yet. We will have to wait for the assassin before we can condemn those males.” He ran one hand across my cheek, pulling me tightly to him with a dark longing in his eyes.
“Eris I-“ he cut me off before I could continue, his eyes sparkled with that same dark look.
“Look Starlight, I can handle myself but if it would please you and make you feel better about the situation then stay beside me tonight, watch over and protect me darling.” His voice was a soothing melody in my ears, lulling me into a false sense of security with the ever present weight of the assassin hanging above us.
“Please…” I mumbled and buried my head in his chest.
“Of course starlight” he mumbled into my head as he planted a small kiss into my hair.
He curled up in bed and I curled up on the loveseat tucked into the corner of the room with my illusion dusted over me; thankfully the night was uneventful and in the early hours I climbed into the bed beside Eris who wrapped his arm around me in a groggy fog.
After a week the threat had yet to be seen and Eris’s schedule had seemed to become busier, leaving him rarely alone with anyone or even by himself until the very end of the day. My duties as emissary had been paused by Eris himself as he noticed I had become overly exhausted and was becoming increasingly sicker as the days continued, I had fallen asleep in meetings or even had to dismiss myself from some of them due to nausea.
“Until you are cleared by my appointed healer,” Eris had firmly told me, “I’ll be pausing your duties as emissary here.”
I had grumbled but agreed to schedule an appointment with the healer that afternoon to appease him and be allowed to continue with my job. The halls were quiet in the staff wing, most of the servants would be spread out across the rest of the manor at this time, preparing for dinner or guest rooms, or just general cleaning. I knocked softly on the healers office door, a greeting ushered me in from the other side.
Inside was a young eccentric male that reminded me of Helion in a way, he ushered me to sit in a padded seat across from him. Eris had written to him with his concerns about my health and the male asked me if I had any concerns of my own. I just agreed to what Eris had identified with a grumble and he moved on with the exam.
“How long has this been occurring?” The male's hands glowed a faint green as he ran his hands around my body several inches above my skin.
“It’s progressed since the Last night of the war, at first I just assumed it was an after effect of the fae bane exposure.” I was uncomfortable with the males' closeness to me and shifted in my seat.
He nodded and continued his examination, it was rather uneventful as he checked through multiple things.
“Its a long shot but there's one more thing I’d like to check if thats okay?” He asked me with a shrug.
“Yeah why not, that way Eris will be satisfied and I can get back to my duties” I shrugged back at him.
His hands changed from that green glow to a pink glow and his eyes widened, a smile grew on his face. “Congratulations. It seems like my long shot guess was correct.”
He turned from me and back to a small pad of parchment and scribbled a few things down on it before handing it to me, my fave paled as I read the care plan ahead of me.
“I’d like to schedule a week from now to follow up with everything, you will still be in this court correct?” I nodded and he scribbled on another piece of parchment. “Then I'll see you at the same time in a week!” He handed me the second parchment with the next appointment scheduled on it.
The walk back to my chambers had begun as quiet, the setting sun outside the windows a tell of the hours spent in the healers office. The parchment folded up in my pocket a heavy weight as I thought how to tell Eris the news; lost in my thoughts I had taken a wrong turn and ended up in Eris’s private wing, an indication of where my mind was at and whose company it sought out for my distress, except something felt off in the wing as I was several halls from Eris’s room but a foreign sour scent lingered at the edges of the air. Had I not been a trained spy the change in scent wouldn’t have alarmed me but I knew Eris’s scent too well, knew how it both soured when he was upset and how it could be a breath of fresh air when he was in a happy mood, and I knew when someone was trying to hide their scent.
I felt the muscles in my back around the deep scars twitch like they never had before, like I had watched them do when my brother's wings flared. An unease screamed at me and that familiar sense of dread rose in my throat, I tried to swallow it back but a loud shattering noise sent me down the hall at a full sprint. The halls were dark and I was unable to Lightstep into Eris’s room, I rounded a corner to find the door to his room cracked open and I threw it open to find Eris fighting off a bane laced dagger from his throat. My intrusion on their fight was enough of a distraction to gove Eris a one up by shoving the dagger away and throwing the unidentified male off of him, the make retailiated just as quickly sinking the dagger into Eris’s side as borh were scrambling up from the floor. I screamed as I watched Eris howl in pain and collapse on the floor, the intruding male moved towards the windows; there was enough light in the room for me to lightstep right behind him and sink the twin sister dagger of Truthteller into his neck, the adrenaline in my system was enough for me to decapitate the male. I didnt care if it would have looked better to bring him to the dungeons, I had overheard that conversation and knew who had conspired against my Eris.
Once the head hit the ground I turned to Eris who was holding the dagger and his side with shallow breaths, with blood pounding in my ears and tears beginning to well up I dropped to my knees to find him barely conscious.
I pulled his head into my lap and cried over him begging him to stay with me, his faint voice tried to soothe me but the crack in his voice was enough for me to realize I very well could lose him tonight.
“You have to stay with me Eris, you have to! You cant leave me like this Eris! I need you!” I sobbed into his slowly rising and falling chest.
One of his hands found its way into my hair as a soothing gesture. “You’ll be okay Starlight.”
It broke me even more and I shook my head, tears rapidly cascading down my face. “No! I wouldn't be! You can't leave me like this Eris! You aren't allowed to die here! I’m pregnant Eris! Do you hear me! You can’t die, you have to be here for me and the babe!”
I felt Eris stiffen, his grasp in my hair tightening. “Your-“ I nodded and he smiled softly but his breathing became even shallower.
I felt his grasp loosen and drop from my hair, my head shot up only to watch his eyes roll back in his head. I screamed and called his name and when no response came I was hauling him into my arms. Drawing every ounce of power I could spare I folded and weaved the light around us while screaming for Rhys in my mind. He answered almost immediately and I let him see what had happened just as I felt the weave of light complete and I was reappearing in my home court, I was greeted by my brothers and Madja who ushered us into a room with a bed they had me lay him on. I was pulled out of the room into the living room by Rhys and Azriel, my twin wrapping his wings around me as I sobbed into his chest.
I had cried myself to sleep in Azriel’s arms but was awoken by a sudden wave of nausea that had me pulling myself away from him and into the kitchen where I found myself expelling what lunch I managed to eat before the appointment earlier today. Azriel was behind me pulling my hair farther out of the way for me and he rubbed my back softly, a soothing gesture.
“You alright?” His voice was a quiet whisper as the house was in a quiet slumber except for the occasional noise of Madja doing something in Eris’s room.
I nodded and slid my hand into my pocket handing him the folded pieces of paper. He read over them as I rinsed my mouth out with water from the sink and spit it back out.
“By the mother.” He cursed “You're pregnant?” He looked at me quizzically and I nodded toeing my hair into a half up bun in case another wave of nausea hit me.
“Yeah.” I mumbled, throat hoarse.
“It's his isn't it?” A look of sadness and pity crossed his face, a sorrow deep in his eyes. I nodded again.
“How long?” He asked, his voice cracked.
“Me and Eris? Since the first ball we met. The babe? Conceived the night he became high lord. I started getting sick shortly after that.” My own voice cracked as I fought back tears.
“Does he know?” He sat the papers on the counter and extended an arm out to me, I placed my hand in his.
“I told him right before he passed out, I told him it was why he had to pull through.” A sob broke through my lips, and Azriel pulled me into him.
I broke down sobbing into his chest, he wrapped his wings around us until Rhys clearing his throat broke through the air. Azriel pulled me back by the shoulders and wiped the tears from my face, Rhys shifted awkwardly on his feet in the doorway clearly having heard and seen our exchange.
“We’ll talk about this later, okay Starlight?” His voice was soft as I nodded.
We both turned to Rhys who joined our little circle, He took my hand in his as he spoke. “Madja managed to stitch up his wound and said he's stable but still unconscious while his body tries to heal itself, she managed to flush the bane out of his system but it weakened him enough his healing delayed and he lost a lot of blood. She doesn't know how long he will be out but you can go in there now with him if you want.” He pulled me into a tight hug and I thanked him.
I slipped into the room where Madja was bottling up a few potions for Eris, she gave me a small smile and a nod.
I rested one hand on her shoulder the other on my stomach and leaned back against the table she was working on. “Thank you Madja, for saving him for us.”
She nodded her accent heavy as she spoke to me. “You care very deeply for him, it's a good quality to have to love that purely. Your brothers may not recognize why you care but they understand your emotions, It's why Rhys had no restraint in summoning me to work on the High Lord you care for.”
I smiled at her. “Yeah, I'm not gonna lie to you Madja, I think he's my mate. He's always just had an allure that called me to him, since the first time we met we just clicked like a puzzle piece. When I saw him on the floor there, something so deep in my chest I didn't know it could exist screamed and throbbed with a red hot glowing pain. I think I’ve always just known we were mates, in my adrenaline and panic I think the bond finally snapped but I was too overwhelmed and worried to really process everything going on.”
She smiled and nodded at me. “A good bond doesn't need to ring true, like Rhysand told you he simply looked at Feyre and knew. You simply know what he is to you and that is fine, it doesn't have to be a grand realization.”
“Thank you, Madja.” I gave her a soft smile and she pushed a small bottle into my hand.
I looked at her quizzically as she smirked. “For the nausea the babe causes.”
A blush rapidly grew on my face and my eyes widened. “How did you?”
A sparkle glistened in her eyes, she had always been a grandmother to the entire inner circle. “Girl, i’ve been treating you since you and Azriel joined Rhys here, I know your scent and any good healer knows what a babe does to a female's scent. It was entirely too easy to scent it on you for me, hopefully that helps with any and all nausea you have. Just one drop of the vial into any drink you have once a day, it's tasteless so it should mix well with anything.”
“Thank you again Madja. Have a goodnight.” She smiled and nodded at me and slipped out the door.
I turned my attention to the shirtless male in the bed, white bandages wrapped around the lower half of his torso and his breath was a steady rise and fall of his chest, no longer weak and shallow. He laid on his uninjured side with his loose bangs falling in his face, I leaned on the bed to move them out of the way when one of his hands tightened on my wrist and he mumbled something I couldn't make out; but I knew Eris he had done this many times when I’d return from the bathroom to crawl back into bed with him. I smiled softly and kicked off my boots then curled up beside him, he wrapped his arm tightly around my waist while I played with the loose hairs that fell into his face.
A groan coming from Eris was what woke me up just as the light started peaking through the windows, he had tried to sit up and was clutching his side where the dagger had been.
“Woah! careful Eris I don't want you ripping any stitches.” I fussed over him till I was able to get him laying back down.
A sickly smile was on his face as he winced. “Morning Starlight.”
I scowled at him. “Morning Starlight? That's it! You almost died, Eris! You absolute dork. I was worried, you know?”
He smiled at me, still relatively pale and weak as his body used the energy to slowly repair itself. “What you said before I passed out… Is it true?”
I nodded and his hand found mine. “Are you mad?”
His voice cracked. “Darling, why would I be mad?”
I sighed and made my way over to the table where Madja had left a few bandages and busied myself with collecting what I would need to change his bandages. “I just figured since you originally said you didn’t care for children.”
“Darling, come here.” He called for me with his hand outstretched.
I rounded the bed carrying the small collection of medical supplies and set them on the end table. I looked up at him through my lashes and began to slowly undo the wrap around his torso, he winced as we got to the lower bandages that stuck to the edges of the wound where blood was crusted to the cotton.
He winced as I dabbed on some anti infection and pain cream Madja had whipped up. “Darling.” His voice was a bit firmer.
I looked up from the gnarly bruising purple and red wound held closed by black thread and found his eyes, tears welling up in my own eyes as he spoke to me. “Darling I’m not mad. I wish I could get up from this damn bed to hold you and show you what this means to me.”
I smiled at him before I turned my attention back to the wound, the edges had started to seal back together nicely, a faint red scar slowly beginning to emerge was an indicator it would heal nicely.
I began rewrapping the cotton bandages around him as I spoke. “We have plenty of time to make up for it now then.”
I tucked in the cotton and helped him sit up slowly. He grimaced as he spoke, adjusting to the strain in his body. “Thank you Starlight. Because of you I had a reason to keep fighting. I said that I didn’t care for children back then because I was scared I would end up too much like my own father, but because of you I know I won’t,” he laughed softly “You wouldn’t let me. If you have helped me realize anything, it is that everything I do to better myself and my court is only possible thanks to you and how you believed in me. The thought of doing it all for you has helped me through every time I doubted myself.”
Tears welled in my eyes as I looked into his amber ones. “Eris…”
He gave me a smile that was mixed with a wince as he tried to pull me into his arms and lap. “Don’t worry Starlight, I'm not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me whether you like it or not.”
I let out a small laugh as I buried my head in the crook of his neck. “…For both of you…” he added.
“I’m sure you will be an amazing father Eris.” I yawned and curled up closer to him.
I awoke to a wave of nausea, excusing myself from Eris’s arms saying I would bring him some food as we and slipped into the kitchen, the little vial in my hands. I stirred a drop into a warm cup of tea and sipped on it for a few seconds till the nausea dissolved and I was able to actually drink the warm concoction, I reached for a plate in the cabinet and put a couple of warm pastries the house had made for breakfast on it; another cup of tea ,which I had stirred some honey into, for Eris in my other and started my trek back to his room.
I felt Rhys’s talons knock on my mental shield and I let him in with a tired “Good Morning.”
“Morning! How's he doing?” Rhys called back to me.
“Sore but awake.” I answered by showing him the imagery of the wound in my mind.
I felt his grimace as he replied back to me. “I’ll send Madja up in a bit then.”
“Thank you Rhys.” I motioned back to him.
I felt him slip from my mind with a “No problem sister.”
As I neared the room I heard talking coming from inside of Eris’s room, the door was cracked and I could see Azriel glaring down at Eris before he cracked a smile and patted Eris’s shoulder.
“Look I know we have had our disagreements Eris but I want to be a good male here, for my sisters sake not yours, you make her happy and as long as you are trying to be a good male for her and are going to step up and be a good male for the child you two made then I have no qualms with you. Deal?” He sighed and extended his hand out to Eris to shake.
Eris winced and met Azriel halfway, shaking his hand. “Deal. I plan to be your brother in law anyways.”
I had to stop myself from choking on air, as I pushed the door open slowly acting like I hadn't just overheard their entire conversation. “Alright I’m back and I brought croissants and a warmed honeyed tea with me.”
I turned to look at Azriel, faming my surprise to see him, he raised a brow ar me before nodding and moving to help me carry the plates. “Sorry, I was just coming to check how everything was going on in here, I sent some of my spies out to do a sweep of your court in case any other assassins or conspirators were in place.”
I perked up as he said that sitting the plate of croissants on Eris’s lap. “I can get you a list of those who have given me reason to believe they mean ill intents towards Eris or the Autumn Court in general.”
“That would be helpful.” Azriel nodded, “no rush though, I don’t wanna cause you or Eris any undue stress.”
“I’ll write it down here in a bit when we settle in for the day.” I handed the cup to Eris as he took a sip from it.
Azriel gave me a soft smile and a nod as he slipped from the room, the door clicking shut behind him. Eris nibbled at the pastry in his lap and I fixed myself up a spot in a padded chair at his bedside, making the list for my brother. Eventually Eris finished his breakfast and I sat the plate on his end table, he gently pulled me into his lap and tucked me into his uninjured side.
“We have lots to talk about Starlight.” He crooned at me. “Like what name ideas you've had so far for our little flame.”
I sighed softly nuzzling into his warmth. “I haven’t really thought about it, other things have been on my mind.”
“Like what Starlight?” He mused.
“Like what this means for us?” I chirped back at him, thinking of the earlier conversation I listened in on.
“And what do you want for us Starlight?” He inquired with a hint of amusement in his voice.
I hummed back at him. “I'd like to be an us.”
He hummed back at me, mimicking my own. “And what kind of an us would you like to be?”
I smacked his shoulder softly. “. I dunno, something more than what we are right now? Something official? Married? Mates? I don't know, just something more.”
He snorted trying to play off his panic that he may have been planning the same thing. “A bit forward with the marriage part there huh Star-“ he paused and looked over at me quickly, his eyes wide and sparkling. “Wait. Did you say mates?”
I swallowed and nodded shallowly. “Yeah.”
His eyes sparkled brighter. “I was waiting for you to figure it out for yourself, when did you realize?”
I smiled at him adoringly. “I think I’ve always just known, honestly.”
He moved to cup my face in one of his hands. “I realized the night of the war that Beron died, when you were cleaning the blood off of me with such care.” He pulled me deep into a kiss and hummed. “I think I realized then because it showed how much you cared, you have always been the only person to ever care for me to such a degree.”
I pressed my forehead to his,adjusting how I sat against him. “Then we have forever to look forward to.”
Eris groaned and tried to press another kiss to my lips but missed as I adjusted and his lips landed on my neck instead. “The second I can get out of this bed, we are accepting this bond.”
I snorted and he pouted. “Any questions regarding what the healer said about the pregnancy?”
His eyes sparkled again like one of his hounds he favored when Eris would throw them a scarp at the dining table. “How far along are you then, love?”
“Probably about 2 and a half months, if my assumption of the conception date being the night you became High Lord.” I reasoned.
He raised a brow at me, his hand moving from my hip to rest on my stomach. “And why do you assume that night, we have slept together plenty of times.”
I placed my hand on top of his and watched as his eyes dropped to our combined hands. “I assumed that originally because I started getting sick shortly after that, and my second assumption was the added hormonal boost of all that extra magic in the air. But! Now you have just backed up my assumption without even knowing it.”
“How?” He challenged.
“If it was also the night you realized I was your mate then your hormones and instincts were already heightened from the new magic in your veins and on the hormonal and instinctual boost from the mating bond and then boom!” I made a motion with my hands, “Your hormones and instincts were triple, maybe even quadruple what they were before.”
“Okay, yeah, that actually makes sense.” He mumbled.
Eventually Madja came back in later in the evening, she looked over Eris’s wounds and gave him the all clear as long as he took a few days of rest off. She said she would come by Autumn in a few weeks to connect with the healer there and to help monitor my pregnancy, she handed me a few extra vials of anti-nausea potions with a pat on my back and told me to take it easy myself since I had been stressed enough the day before to make up for several months. She applied a salve to Eris’s wound and placed a smaller bandage over it, since the risk of tearing it was less severe. I handed Azriel the list of possible conspirators and he took it with a nod, his spies would continue to investigate thoroughly since I was officially out of the spy commission.
We returned to the Autumn Court where Eris held an emergency meeting for the entirety of the Forest House staff, he called me on stage with him and announced our mating bond, his intention to marry me, and the news of my pregnancy. As I looked over the crowd tucked nicely under Eris’s bad side to provide support I noticed several of my brother’s spies I had grown close to after working with them for so many years, it was bitter sweet seeing them there, knowing that after all these years they were here to watch over me the way I had watched over and trained all of them with brother when we first joined Rhys’s inner court. Then Eris rolled his shoulders and cleared his voice, the atmosphere of the entire court changing with it. He growled out the names of the two traitors that had hired the hit man on him, two of my brother’s spies dragged them forward and they started begging and panicking as Eris told his court of their treachery. Guards dragged them off to the dungeons and their own deaths were ordered by me as Eris gave me the opportunity to pick the punishment, I found it only fitting they be killed for their crimes as they tried to kill my mate.
It was the first of many things Eris would have me decide for the court but we had other matters to handle first. We spent the rest of the week relaxing as the rest of his wound healed till all that was left was an angry red scar and by the end of the week the smallest bump had become visible along with the obvious scent change that let everyone know of my condition, it was barely noticeable but it was enough for Eris to be practically feral. When a craving for one of the Autumn Court’s signature desserts, a pumpkin bread loaf, hit me Eris had slaved away in the kitchens till he presented one he baked himself to me. The bond had been consummated,after everything had settled into place a week or two later we were married in front of his entire court and the rest of our friends and family; after our marriage ceremony he held a second ceremony making me his high lady.
Months passed by and my bump grew quickly, by the fourth month Madja had condemned me to general rest since she knew it would be impossible to keep me in bed but I was to be relaxing at all times, either laying down or sitting on either a bed or a padded couch. Between Madja and the male healer who I learned was named Nicoden’s constant checkups I learned they were mildly concerned with the speed in which the babe was growing, at first I argued with Madja it was probably due to wings from the Illyrian blood but she shot down my suggestion when she made the point Feyre wasn’t nearly as big with Nyx and he had wings. Eventually Nicoden made a suggestion about there being more than one babe, we had caught it too early to discern genders or numbers the first time I had seen him, he cited the fact Azriel and I were twins when Madja tried to disagree; it had come down to Nico and Madja putting money on it and both of them glaring at the other as they checked the babes, my answer came in the format of Madja digging into her pockets to smack a few notes into the males outstretched hand.
“Can we keep this between the three of us? I want to surprise Eris with the news.” I asked.
They both agreed and Nico turned to me excitedly, “Do you want to know the gender of the babes yet?”
When I disagreed he got very smug, knowing something like that and being one of the only two to know. “Anything I can do to help with the surprise?”
Madja kissed my forehead and helped me adjust how I was sitting so I could get a sip from a drink I had mixed my anti nausea medicine in. “Actually Nico, there is. Since I’m on rest could you run into the city for me and pick out a toy for each of the babes? Wrap them all in a box together and I’m sure he will catch the drift.”
Nico was practically vibrating in his seat as he nodded excitedly, Madja congratulated me and dismissed herself to winnow home. Eris was in his last meeting of the day when Nicoden returned with the box and an eager smile on his face.
‘Tell me how it goes.’ He mouthed.
I rolled my eyes and agreed, shooing him out of the room. I sat the box beside me on the padded chair and returned to my book while waiting for Eris to return to our room for the night.
It was about an hour later when my red-headed mate slinked into our room, exhaustion evident in his features. He had been swamped with meetings trying to get everything wrapped up with the investigations and getting the newly appointed ones adjusted to their roles before he would have to take a few weeks off with me when the babes arrived.
He dragged himself over to me, kissing me softly. “Hello darling, I missed you.” he groaned as he sat on the sofa beside me and stretched out.
“I have a surprise for you love.” I mused, closing my book and tossing it to the coffee table.”
“Oh? What’s that love?” He yawned.
“Here, open it, slowly now.” I handed him the delicate box.
He straightened how he was sitting, plopping the box into his lap and pulling two plush toys from the box: one a small fox and the other looked like one of his hounds. “Two toys? Is it for the babe?”
“Babes.” I corrected.
“Babes?” He asked, eyes wide.
“Babes.” I nodded.
“Babes!” He cheered
Tears welled in his eyes as he littered my face with kisses until he suddenly pulled back brows furrowed. “How did you get these? You didn't go into town did you?”
I snorted at his protective nature. “No, I had Nicoden go and fetch them for me after we found out so I could surprise you.”
“Remind me to give him a bonus.” Eris growled out to me with a smile on his face as he pulled me into a sloppy kiss.
I took the toys from him and sat them softly back into the box, he pouted at me but cut himself off by yawning. “Alright Eris darling I do believe it is time for bed. We are all tired.”
Eris stood motioning for me to wait and took a few steps forward as he yawned, the fangs that grew when he became high lord flashing in the firelight. My eyes raked over his body as he began unbuttoning his dress shirt, tossing it in the basket the laundress would take in the morning.
He looked over at me with a feline-like grin on his face. “Do you want to change into anything love?”
I nodded and watched as he kicked the heeled shoes he wore into their place beside the door. “Can I get my black nightgown? The silk one?”
He nodded and stepped into the walk-in closet coming back out with my gown over his shoulder, he had changed into loose silk pants that matched said gown and tossed his slacks into the basket.
“This one right?” He held it up for me to see and when I nodded he sat it on the foot of the bed.
He walked over to me , helping me slowly stand and he escorted me to the bed; I held onto one of the four posters as he helped me out of my daily wear and into the silk sleeping gown. When we were both satisfied with the level of comfy we were at, he helped me into the bed and under our covers; he rounded the bed to crawl into his own side, though he was quick to curl up around me with his hand on my stomach and he was out like a light the second I dismissed the faelights.
The rest of the pregnancy was rather uneventful, but when the babes decided to come several days early they made up for the lack of excitement. Eris had been in a meeting with Rhys, Azriel, Cassian, and the rest of the inner circle discussing heightening defenses for the babes ceremonies and the ball that would be hosted in their honor when they decided to come; while I was simply being helped up from my bed by Madja, who had made her home in the autumn court a week before the babes birth to be prepared for them, to go to the bathroom. I had stood and only taken a couple of steps when my water had broken and Madja told me not to worry, summoning Nicoden who quickly prepared the room for the birth faster than I could blink. Madja had written to my mate and brothers, informing them of the upcoming labors and invited them to sit outside the room but due to the protective natures males got over their mates and spawn were not allowed inside till after everything was completed; Madja helped me into a birthing gown and into bed while Nico summoned the gaggle of top of the line healers he and Madja had picked, in total there was about 6 healers counting Madja and Nico in the room that evening. It had been a rough labor due to tears and cuts from the wings on one of the babes; the smaller of the two ,a male, had a pair of wings equal to the size of his body and the talon of his wing had caught wrong on his way out and cut into me but thankfully my body healed it rather quickly. The blood made the labor seem worse than it was, after the first of the twins, a large wingless female, was out the rest was rather easy until the smaller twin’s wing caught. Madja was focused on me while Nico focused on the babes health, one nurse I remembered as Madja’s apprentice from Velaris was constantly monitoring my vitals, another was at my side dabbing my brow with a wet cloth, one was helping Nicoden with the babes and the final one was stood off to the side writing down whatever he was told too.
Eventually both babes and myself had been cleared, Nico passed them both to me and they curled up right against my chest. Madja had all the nurses off to one side as she and Nico magiced the room clean, a talent I noted I would so have to learn soon. Nico and Madja exchanged looks to each other before both nodded and Nicoden cracked the door open, stepping out to talk with my mate and family. When he came back in, Eris followed, peeking his head in, his eyes fell on me and the babes and I watched as they teared up; he took a few steps into the room softly shutting the door so it wouldn’t wake either sleeping babe and crawled onto the bed beside me. He sat very patiently beside me, his eyes sparkling with tears as he watched the two babes sleep and cling to their plush toys. The nurses, Nicoden, and Madja all dipped into the hall with my family to give us space.
I nodded towards the babe on my left side where he sat”Your daughter, hold her Eris.”
“My… daughter?” His voice cracked and I watched the tears start rolling down his face.
“Yep, she was the first born.” He looked up at me, the complete adoration in his features was the biggest indication of how he was feeling.
“Oh! The mother has blessed us.” He mumbled and sniffled, looking back down at her.
He rocked her gently and she opened her eyes, his bright golden ambers, she cooed and giggled up at him. “Well hello there.” He cooed right back at her, booping her little nose with his finger.
She grasped onto his finger and he looked up at me and looked like he was about to burst at the seams with tears. “Ohhhh Eris!” I mused at them softly.
“Seraphina? For her name?” He asked with a whimper.
“I like it, Seraphina she is then.” I smiled at him, he leaned in to give me a kiss.
“What about your son Eris? Would you like to hold him too?” I asked softly, and he nodded swiftly.
He placed Seraphina back into my arms and took the tiny male from my arms, he fit perfectly in the palm of Eris’s hand and when Eris realized how small he was he broke into tears.
“He’s so tiny, love… He fits in my hand.”I could see the tears run down his cheeks as he held the tiny winged male close.
“Eris, love, its okay. Nothings wrong with him.” I cooed to him.
“He’s just so tiny… What if I hurt him?” he mumbled and sniffled.
“You would never Eris, I know that. You are a gentle and patient male, you can do this.” I mused, extending my free hand to his cheek.
He looked up at me, eyes sparkling with tears. “You name him, I named her.”
I hummed considering a few options before I finally spoke. “Orius?” It's the name of one of the stars above Velaris.”
He nodded softly “Orius and Seraphina, our babes, by the mother.”
He held Orius close and sobbed, fully sobbed. “Eris love, what's wrong?”
“What if I can’t do this? What if I turn out just as bad as Beron? I can't do that to them, look at how precious they are!” His voice cracked as he confided in me.
“Eris,” I called to him softly, my voice barely above a whisper in the intimate setting. “ What did I say about your fear of becoming Beron?”
He hiccuped as he tried to suck in a breath. “That my fear of becoming Beron, is what will keep me from becoming Beron and will help me become a better father than he was?”
I smiled at him and yawned softly. “Exactly, I know you Eris Vanserra and I know you will be the best you can be for me and for them now too.”
I pulled him into a kiss and he managed to pull himself together just enough to thank me. “Think you can handle your family or are you too exhausted?”
“I can handle them, if I get too tired I’ll just fall asleep with them here. They can’t blame me.” I joked and he snorted.
He waved his hand towards the door and snapped, it swung open softly on its hinges and I watched as everyone realized they were invited in. Azriel was the first through the door and the first to my side, the rest of the circle lounged in various seats around the room. Nyx had gone with Madja and Nico so his mother and father could meet the newest editions, but he was still a babe himself so he simply slept in the older female's arms while they made their way back to Nicoden’s office.
I passed off Seraphina to Azriel, his eyes welling up as he looked her over. She was bright eyed and curious, cooing away at him.
“Meet your niece Az.” I yawned and Eris moved up the bed to sit against the propped up pillows with me.
“Well hello there mam.” Azriel whispered at the small female who shook her little fist at him.
I yawned and nuzzled into Eris, I fell asleep rather quickly exhausted from the birth but now comfortable enough with my family around to relax. Everything was going to be okay, I had Eris and we had our Seraphina and Orius. Eris’s spiced cinnamon scent was like a lullaby as I drifted off into dreamland imagining what our future would look like from here on out. No matter what the pros and cons ended up being, I was happy they resolved the way they did, everyone together celebrating.
Taglist: @minaethrym, @melsunshine
#acotar x reader#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#eris vanserra x reader#eris acotar#azriel acotar#acotar fanfiction
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Just read through the MKEgged tag, and where's Redson? I want to see the roller-coaster he goes on of "A baby!? Wait, who's the father If it can't be me? Oh, okay, no other parent. I'll step in and help, what do you mean the pregnancy has a high mortality rate!?"
Just this guy trying to figure out what he's feeling and how to handle things with this baby, because yay baby, but also No you're not allowed to die!"
Prev.
haha yes! XD
Red Son's bull-brain tells him "Whomst is the father!?" immediately, even if him and MK aren't in a fully romantic relationship yet. His infatuation tells him that only *he* can father Noodle Boy's progeny!
The fact that the pregnancy was magical in nature calms him down only a little bit... until he learns that MK's true species have a high maternal mortality rate due to this unique form of reproduction.
Red Son, busting on into MK's prenatal appointment: "Noodle Boy!! Who said that you're allowed to die!? I strictly forbid it!"
Red Son goes out of his way to investigate what knowledge is available on Stone Monkeys so he can devise a way to help MK survive and recover. He knocks on the door of every soul he can think of who would hold some idea of what to do; Lao Tzu, The Gold Star of Venus, and even Guanyin herself.
The alchemist and planet god both only had second-hand accounts of how Stone Monkeys lived, but provided copies of their literature all the same.
Approaching her old master was a little awkward, but the Bodhisattva Guanyin is a patron god of safe childbirth, and Red Son wanted to have their input on the matter. To her surprise, Guanyin was equally concerned for MK's well-being - and had already offered to attend the birth to ensure that they could monitor MK and the baby. Red Son learns from Guanyin that Sun Wukong himself had such questions many centuries ago, but curiously dropped the matter sometime after the Journey. Former master and disciple share a warm goodbye, finally reunited by their worry over a noodle monkey-boy.
Xiwangmu was still mourning the loss of her husband, so Red Son thought it improper to bother her on such a matter - but clearly Lao Tzu or Gold Star blabbed. The very next time Red Son stepped into the Celestial Realm, he found himself swept into a suffocating hug by the Queen Mother of the West.
Xiwangmu, weeping: "Oh, my little fire opal. You are so proactive! Scouring the Heavens and Earth to find a way to save your mate and child!" Red Son, confused: "EHH!?!?"
Turns out, the Queen Mother had a gut-reaction to hearing that her grandson's beloved ("WHO TOLD!?" shrieks Red) Monkey Prince was pregnant. And that reaction was; "GREAT-GRANDCUBS?!?!"
Red Son barely has a second to object. The Queen Mother weeps how the Jade Emperor is to miss the birth of his first great-grandchild, but that the pregnancy is a light in a very dark time for her and the court. She orders her court secretary to give Red Son unlimited access to the celestial library so that he can continue his research.
After the whirlwind of discovering that apparently even Heaven itself blames him for MK's Egg, Red Son turns to only two known members of the Noodle Boy's species.
Sun Wukong and the Six Eared Macaque.
The Macaque was the most difficult to get information out of since he kept slipping into the shadows whenever Red brought up questions on his species. Luckily one attempt/battle (it got out of hand) lead to the appearance of Sun Wukong on the scene.
Wukong: "What's the issue, firecracker?" Red Son, holding thick notepad: "I need to understand your species so I can devise a way to prevent MK's stone egg from killing him!" Macaque, turns off powers: "Oh! Why didn't you say so? I thought you were trying to dissect me or something!" XD Wukong: "We know almost everything there is on our species, so fire away kiddo." Red Son: "Yes! Finally! Question 1; in the case of self-spawned eggs, is the child a genetic clone of the parent?" Wukong & Macaque: (*both shake their heads*) Wukong: "Oh no. Its not a clone. You see, the Egg absorbs Dao from it's surroundings - not just it's parent. So it steals bits of DNA from whatever troop happens to be around. You know like friends, family-" Macaque, slyly: "Former mates." Wukong: "Former ma- hey!" (*glares*) Red Son, thinking: "So an additional source of life energy could supplement MK's own depleted supply?" Wukong: "Yeah... but the healthiest option is usually a dear friend or life partner. Someone who can cling to them and supply the most juice. Also helpful if the pregnant person wants their kid to look like their fave person." Macaque, knowing smile: "Or... whoever they have a big crush on." Red Son: (*hair-flames briefly flicker pink in blush as he imagines a red-furred baby monkey with calf hooves*) Red Son: "Wait. How come you both know so much about this topic? I know Sun Wukong has access to the celestial library, but Macaque has been barred from the palace grounds since the rebellion! Why do you share the same knowledge?" Wukong & Macaque: (*both start spluttering and choking on air*) Wukong, trying to find words: "You see-! We uh...!" Macaque: (*fades into background at 50% opacity, hiding face in scarf*) Red Son, realising: "Ah. I see. Thank you for your input, gentlemen." Wukong: "Where are you going now?" Red Son: "I'm going over to Noodle Boy's place. I have been invited for company." (*Red Son leaves. Macaque phases back in*) Wukong: "Well. The Egg might not be her doing. But she certainly wishes it was." Macaque: "I'm just glad they didn't try getting more out of us." Wukong, cheeky grin: "Like what? How we both know so much about Stone Eggs because once upon a time we wanted some of our own?" Macaque: (*hides face in scarf again*) "Shut up, peaches."
As for the Demon Bull parents? Well..
PIF, calmly writing letters: "Even if the child was not made the traditional fashion, we will both adore them all the same. I expect any grandchildren of mine to be as beloved as a prince or princess ought to be." DBK, arms full of baby shower gifts: "Make sure to note the exact hour, day, month, and year of the child's birth! It's very important for divining the calf's fortune!" Red Son, flames twitching: "Are you two-!? ARE YOU PLANNING A ROYAL BIRTH ANNOUNCEMENT!?" PIF: "Do not shout dear. My mother visited shortly after you left. Seems that a certain child of mine has been asking around about celestial monkeys and safe magical birthing practices, and it's stirred the court's rumour mill. Me and the simians are planning a formal announcement once the child arrives." Red Son, blushing pink: "I would have gone through the same effort if I only considered them a mere ally." PIF: "I know you would. But a mere ally, does not donate so much life energy to the parent in hopes that the child becomes theirs." Red Son: (*blush grows even bigger, flames spit embers onto the surrounding furniture*) PIF, brushes embers off of desk: "Hopefully, Xiaotian doesn't experience the terrible heartburn I did whilst carrying you." Red Son: "Mother!" DBK, wincing with sympathy: "Only exacerbated by your cravings, my love! You had a great desire for charcoal and spiced meat on the bone."
MK texts Red Son a few hours later asking if he'd like to go out for some barbecue; "Just started craving it for some reason. Oh! And we should make sure to get cheese tea too! Acid reflux acting up rn and I need something to quench the flame."
Red is so down bad.
It's not all sunshine and baby monkeys though - there is genuine worry across the families about MK's condition. None more so than the men who raised him.
(*Red is leaving MK's place after a hang out session, when a certain pig-man in the kitchen speaks up*) Pigsy: "Hey... thanks for being there for him." Red Son, surprised: "Huh? Oh! No problem..." Pigsy: "I know you like him. Like, like-like him. I don't exactly approve but.... you've been going out of your way to find ways to help me. Make sure he..." Pigsy: (*trails off, eyes puffy*) Red Son: (*quietly approaches, awkwardly places a hand on Pigsy's shoulder*) Pigsy: "Promise me something." Red Son: "Ok." Pigsy: "If the worst happens... I want you to still be there. For them. Not just because you like him. But because you really care about him and his kid." Red Son, certain: "I do. I truly care for Xiaotian. And I wish to be there for him through it all. And if the unthinkable were to occur, I would still be there for them." Pigsy, wipes tears with sleeve: "Thanks, punk." Red Son: "Again, no problem." Pigsy, changing tone: "Now! What's with this letter I got saying MK and his baby are gonna be presented to the Heavenly and Infernal Court?" Red Son, remembers previous encounters: "oops."
Once he fully explains the misunderstanding in heaven, Pigsy whacks Red with a spatula.
#MKEgged au#stone egg talk#pregnancy tw#stone monkeys#lmk mk#qi xiaotian#lmk red son#spicynoodleshipping#spicynoodles#spicynoodles being parents#lmk demon bull family#lmk dbk#lmk demon bull king#lmk pif#lmk princess iron fan#lmk xiwangmu#lmk queen mother of the west#lmk dadsy#lmk pigsy#sun wukong#six eared macaque#liu er mihou#shadowpeach#lmk aus#lmk#lego monkie kid
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Rich People Problems
This was my tribute to the works of the incredible @callmecallmecrazy (seriously, what are you doing that you haven't read the legend yet?) and the no less amazing dumb-and-jocked, if you're reading this bro know that we all miss you immensely!
Repost with new images and minimal changes to the story.
.....
Cris sighed for what felt like an eternity before stepping into the luxurious and refined ballroom of the Country Club. This was going to be a painful experience. An engagement party, out of the blue. His mother, Carol, had been widowed a few years back and since then had thrown herself into her work as a lawyer. She was a staunch defender of human rights, fighting hard in court for the less fortunate. Cris greatly admired his mom's work and never judged her for her absences; what she did changed lives, and from an early age, he understood the importance of her work. Even so, because of that, he had always been a lonely kid—absent father, distant mother, and a social awkwardness that kept him from making lasting friendships. Books were his greatest companions, ranging from children's classics to true masterpieces, and it was through reading complex political works that he decided to become a journalist to fight against the ills and injustices of the world, just like his mom.
So, you can imagine Cris's enormous surprise when he found out that his mother had decided to marry the notorious multimillionaire Archibald Sutterland III, a guy with a rep for being a hard-ass boss and totally averse to workers' rights. “The Third,” muttered Cris with disdain. Rich people and their pretentious names, he thought, rolling his eyes as he stepped into the room.
He walked through the place, crawling with pretentious people, all dressed to the nines, casting judgmental looks his way. But he didn’t let it get to him; this was, after all, his mom’s engagement, and he’d wear whatever the hell he wanted. Not that he had time to find “appropriate” clothes for the occasion. Having been snatched by a couple of giant security guards from his college dorm earlier that day, bundled into a private jet, and taken to a stately mansion, where a pompous outfit awaited him on the bed of a room bigger than his former home, he decided to ignore the getup despite the protests of his “guardians,” who, finally defeated, dumped him in a freaking limousine and dropped him off in a place that felt totally alien and hostile to him.
“How does crap like this even happen?” he muttered to himself as he searched for his mother, determined to confront her about this madness. Speaking of madness… he finally spotted her, standing by the bar, wearing a dress he could never have imagined, a goofy smile plastered on her face. Just one more piece of info for the list of absurdities of the day.
“Mom? What the hell is going on?” he asked irritably.
“Cristhian, my dear, I'm glad you made it in time! But what are you wearing? Archibald made it clear to the staff that you should be handled properly!”
“Handled? What the hell, Mom! I'm not some puppy to be 'led' around. And what the fuck is going on anyway? What ridiculous idea of marriage is this?”
“Just be quiet, please, Cristhian. Don't embarrass me in front of the society.”
“And since when do you care about ‘society?’” he said, emphasizing the word with obvious disdain. Forcing a smile in hopes no one noticed the altercation, his mother pulled him aside as she spoke.
“Calm down, let’s talk…”
….
Watching the scene from afar was Archibald Sutterland III, accompanied by his longtime partner and friend, Forrest Gordon-Lenox IV.
“You have to admit, the boy’s got some flair, Archie.” Forrest was one of the few allowed to use that nickname since they’d known each other since childhood, but only when they were alone.
“I should’ve seen it coming that the boy inherited some of his mother’s fire, but if I’ve molded her into an impeccable example of a woman, believe me, I’ll get the brat out of the way. In fact, I think this might be the perfect opportunity to test my own heir,” he said as he saw a handsome young man approaching.
“Good evening, Father. Good evening, Mr. Gordon-Lenox. Looks like Carol is having some issues with her son,” said the handsome muscular blond young man with a mischievous smile on his face.
“Good evening, Chadwick. Your father and I were just talking about your future brother’s peculiar ways.”
“Chadwick, the time has come. I could do it myself, but soon you’ll graduate, and you'll need to step up. I don’t care much for society gossip, but something like this could have negative repercussions on business. So I need you to take care of the kid.”
“Yes, Father, with the greatest pleasure,” replied the young man with a sneaky smile.
….
“Mom, it feels like I’ve walked into a bad adaptation of Stepford Wives! This makes no sense. How can you drop everything, years of career, to marry an old man and become a housewife?”
“If I were you, I’d be very careful with words spoken in such an environment, my friend,” said a sassy voice. Turning around, startled, Cris came face to face with a handsome young man in a light blue suit, matching his eyes, which were currently assessing him with a predatory look.
“Who the hell are you?”
“I’m Chadwick Sutterland.”
“So what…?”
“So what, friend, if we’re going to be brothers, we might as well agree on some things.”
“Brothers???”
“Chadwick is Archibald’s son, Cristhian, so after the wedding, he’ll be your brother.”
“How wonderful,” replied Cris, exasperated.
“Indeed, I think we’re going to get along just fine, Cristhian.”
“I wouldn’t bet on it!”
“Cristhian! Enough of that!” Carol whispered, anguished.
“Let me handle this, Carol. Your son and I just got off on the wrong foot, but let’s fix this together. Cristhian, can’t you at least try this for your mom?” Chadwick concluded in an accusatory tone. Seeing the anguish on the face of the most important woman in his life, Cris relented.
“Okay, since it looks like this craziness is going to happen anyway… but I’m not wearing that pompous crap.” He responded, disdainfully eyeing his future “brother’s” attire, not caring if it offended him.
“Apparently, someone always has to be on top. I think I’ll call you Topper, brother, and since we’re among bros, you can call me Chad.”
“You can call me whatever you want; this ‘brotherly’ relationship won’t last long. So come on, I need a drink.”
“Excellent, follow me, please. Carol, if you’ll excuse us!” Chadwick finished, dragging Cris with him across the hall.
….
“Drink this, bro,” said Chad, handing Cris a glass of bourbon. He had pulled him into a locker room near the Club’s gym. The pompous and polite demeanor faded, replaced by a relaxed attitude and carefree vocabulary, which made Cris’s initial dislike for the guy diminish considerably.
“What you need to understand, now that you’re joining our circle, is that appearances are everything—the way you talk, the way you carry yourself, the way you dress… so this behavior won't help you Topper!” He continued, using that stupid nickname, apparently a bond between brothers or something, and no matter how much Cris protested, Chadwick was Chad, and Cristhian was Topper. After some failed attempts, Cris finally stopped objecting; after all, he intended to have as little contact as possible with Chad after that night.
“I don’t give a crap about that, Chad. My mom can commit this madness if that’s what she wants, which I still have a hard time believing. But once tonight’s circus is over, I’m going back to college without looking back.”
“I understand your indignation; I was also blindsided by my dad’s decision. My mom passed away less than a year ago. So understand, you’re not the only one upset here, bro. But my father is used to getting what he wants, and he wants your mother. He met her a few months back in court, oddly enough. She argued her case against one of our companies with such ferocity that it warmed something in the old man’s icy heart. Since then, he’s been courting her relentlessly until she accepted the proposal last week. It might’ve seemed sudden, but as I told you, my dad gets what he wants, when he wants,” concluded the boy, bitterness creeping into his voice. This earned him a few more points with Cristhian. Maybe not everyone there was that awful. But still full of indignation he continued to complain.
“I don’t understand why my mom didn’t tell me anything; it’s not like her.”
“Bro, you know how women are; no one can predict their crap.”
To avoid an unwanted discussion with someone he was trying to create some kind of sympathy with, Cris let the sexist comment slide.
“Still, I don’t understand why I need to wear this!” he said, looking at a suit identical to his future “brother’s.”
“Appearances, brother. Coming here poorly dressed not only tarnishes you, but also your mom, my dad, and our family name. Come on, try it; I bet you’ll feel a lot better.”
With one last sigh, Cris began to undress. As he prepared to put on the pompous outfit he suddenly found himself very close to a grinning Chad, holding a bright red gem in his hand.
“Not yet, Topper; first, we need to make some changes.”
The stone began to emit an intense glow. Afraid of what he was seeing, Cristhian tried to escape. But suddenly, his legs went rigid and immobile, as if glued to the ground.
“What the hell is going on? What are you doing?”
“Silence, now is your time to listen. You will only speak when I say so.” Cris felt his lips tighten, not painfully, but still totally unable to form a sentence; his vocal cords incapacitated from producing any sound.
“I like you, Topper, really, you’ve got some guts. I think we could still be real brothers. But the way things are, it won't work. Do you know why? Because of what you are. Or what the people who matter think you are. And do you know what they think, Topper? I’m sure many in that hall looked at you and thought: a nobody. But what they haven’t thought of is what you really are—an opportunity.” Chad continued, grinning with a disturbing glint in his eyes, reflecting the gem strange glow.
“Have a seat,” he said, pointing to a bench. And Cris felt compelled to sit down, the movement returning to his legs. But when he tried to turn and run, he ended up sitting right where Chad instructed him.
“Such a good boy,” sneered Chad, the red gem held in his hand.
“You know what that is, Topper? That’s why your fierce mother became a trophy wife-to-be. And that’s also the key to the future—mine and yours, bro. So I guess I owe this version of you an explanation.
“This stone has been in my family for generations, passed down from father to son, ensuring our lineage, our money, and our name continue to live on. I wouldn’t be surprised if it was the reason old Dorrance Sutterland, the founder of our line, got his passage on the Mayflower. But I confess, for some generations, the Sutterland men have used it for more… mundane purposes. When you have everything money can buy, it’s hard to find something that really needs the use of this little beauty.”
“I didn’t lie to you when I said my dad met your mom in court a few months ago; that’s the absolute truth. And I wasn’t lying when I said he tried to woo her either; he did… but was rebuffed, which only ignited the fury inside him even more. And the more the fire inside my father grew, the more the desire to dominate and extinguish his mother’s flame consumed him.”
“You see, this stone has power over reality itself; there’s nothing it can’t do, with few limitations. The curious thing is that my dad doesn’t know this; my grandfather never told him all its potential. To him, it’s only capable of influencing people’s minds, shaping their wills, and even redefining their personalities. But he never suspected it could do so much more.”
“It’s all because my dad has always been a huge jerk. With his stupid rules, his obsession with control, his insufferable rigidity—and the biggest problem of all, his boredom. My grandfather would’ve loved to use the stone on him, but that wasn’t possible; that’s one of the limitations of the stone’s power—it doesn’t work on men of our lineage. We’re the only ones who can use it, but never on ourselves, although there are some interesting ways to at least partially circumvent these rules. Furthermore, each Sutterland man can use it only once in his lifetime.”
“So, my grandfather was forced to live with his boring son, who, despite having a great knack for finances, always showed a total inability to enjoy the pleasures of our way of life. So, as a small form of revenge, he withheld essential info from my father but told me everything, as I was a much better heir to our legacy.”
“My father used his chance with the stone to turn your mother into his trophy wife, Topper. After all the speeches, all the scolding, all the talk of responsibility, he used the stone to win over a woman, just a few months after my mother died! How undignified is that? And when he refused to hand me the stone, he even had the audacity to repeat the usual litany.”
“The same litany that isolated me my whole life, that prevented me from having a true friendship, from living the life I’m entitled to. For my dad, everything I wanted was frivolous; everything was a waste. And everyone looked at me with pity, pity for the poor rich boy. Of course, my peers accepted me and never had the heart to do anything to me; I’m a Sutherland, and that name means a lot. But not even that name can create a real bond. Maybe if my dad had put me in a boarding school, things would’ve been different; maybe some real friendship could’ve been established. But no, I needed to be under his constant surveillance.”
“While my buddies are enjoying their holidays in Ibiza or the Alps, I’m stuck sitting next to him in a dusty office! Even my frat brothers, as much as they talk about the unbreakable bond that unites us, don’t really see me as one of the guys; they respect my name and my position, but it’s clear I’m among them because I’m a legacy. Can you imagine how it feels to see all your ‘brothers’ getting ready for Spring Break, knowing you won’t be able to make it? My dad denied me not only my grandfather’s name but also the opportunity to live my life the way it should be lived by our people—with respect for traditions, sure, but above all, with fun. Yes, with fun! What’s the point of having mountains of money if you can’t enjoy yourself? That’s all I want, Topper—fun!
“You don’t have the slightest idea how much I wanted to get my hands on the stone, but the old man took precautions to keep it away from me, as if I didn’t have my own means. And today, thanks to this outrageous engagement dinner, I finally managed to get my hands on it. And thanks to you, Topper, I’m finally going to find a way to enjoy my life the way I deserve!”
So, put a metaphorical smile on that face because you’ll be enjoying everything with me, bro!” he sighed, concluding his long villainous monologue with a maniacal grin.
Christian, motionless, lips sealed, listened to all that madness, unable to believe it. That was impossible. But so was his current situation. And the story, as absurd as it was, provided an explanation for his mother’s altered behavior. Still, that was all impossible, wasn’t it?
“My grandfather informed my father of specific rules and ways of speaking and ordering the stone, instilling a fear of what might happen if those safeguards were not used, in addition to the obvious omission of its full power. My grandfather was diligent in his revenge, Topper. Thanks to him, my dad lost his chance to achieve something truly extraordinary, but I won’t lose mine. The stone doesn’t need specific and detailed orders; those things only limit its functioning. It’s intimately connected to the deepest desires of its bearer, so just ask, and it will provide. Goodbye, Cristhian; welcome, Topper, bro!” he concluded.
The stone began to emit an intense red glow in great waves, which, in Cristhian’s vision, seemed to distort everything around him, with Chad’s hand becoming a blur.
“That shit was real,” was his last coherent thought before being enveloped by the red light.
…..
Memories came in waves—totally alien to his identity but intrusive, forcing their way in. Two blonde toddlers, so alike you’d think they were twins, in an elegant living room, arguing animatedly about whose father owned the bigger yacht, eliciting giggles from two pretty blonde women, their mothers.
“Yes, he and Chad knew each other from the cradle. No, no, what the hell was that?”
“Their mothers were best friends, college roommates, and in the same sorority, and their fathers had common business interests, so it was natural that the friendship extended to their kids.”
“No, his father had been a college professor, not a businessman, and his mother had never been in a sorority. And for God’s sake, what kind of spoiled brat talks like that?”
Seemingly the same kind of kid who spends their afternoons on the tennis courts at the Country Club while their parents excitedly discuss business. Occasionally pausing to flash an approving smile in his direction, in Cris’s… Topper’s case. Or a stern look in Chad’s.
“Uncle Archibald was always a pain in the ass, but spending time with Chad and Dad was awesome.” It was the thought that popped into Cris’s head while that memory solidified.
Thinking about his father brought up an old and painful memory of Cris, which was quickly overridden by the overwhelming power of the stone. The memory of a thin, brown-haired boy, on a cold winter afternoon, feeling lost and alone was replaced by that of a blonde boy, physically active but with the same feelings of sadness marking his face. But that gradually faded when he felt his best friend’s hand on his shoulder, a warm feeling spreading through his body, knowing he had someone with him.
Although that feeling was interrupted by a flash of irritation when he saw his “Uncle” Archibald whisper something in his mother’s ear. His father had just died, and there was ambitious old Archie harassing his widow, no doubt imagining a way to cash in.
Cris struggled with the conflicting and confused feelings inside him; he knew that none of that was real—not the anger at a man he didn’t know, not that great friendship, not that warmth. But at the same time, it would’ve been nice to have a friend by his side when his father passed away… it had been so nice…
After his father’s death, Cris became responsible, at least in name, for the family’s legacy. His mother, contrary to what one might think, was a true lioness; she took over her late husband’s business with great interest, expanding the family fortune and ensuring every wish of the heir was granted. But at the expense of the son’s loneliness. Christopher Lauder Hawthorne IV, Prince Topper, fourth of his name, heir to a fortune, surrounded by everything he could want... and alone. The exception was his friend Chadwick Sutherland, but even if the two wanted to spend all their time together, that wouldn’t be possible. But his mom made it happen! He didn’t know what kind of deal she made with Archibald, but sometime after his dad died, Christopher, along with Chadwick, was sent to a boarding school.
What would have been torment for other boys was liberating for both of them. Away from his father’s stern gaze, Chadwick enjoyed life for the first time, while Christopher found in his friend a true brother. There was nothing Topper wouldn’t do for him. The two formed a beautiful pair—handsome and charming—soon surrounded by a growing group of friends. Topper, with his outgoing ways and the certainties in life that only the very rich or the very foolish possess, and Chad, with a more cunning way of thinking, but still eager to have as much fun as possible. Leaders among their own.
But anyone who thought those boys were stupid was dead wrong; Chadwick could never let his grades slip, under penalty of losing the ironic freedom the school had granted him. As for Topper, well… he had Chad to help him with the complex stuff and a mom willing to overlook her precious son’s academic incompetence. Even more so when it became clear that the boy had a natural talent for sports when they joined the school’s lacrosse team, which soon morphed into a passion for all sports they could participate in. Topper’s tactical ability on the field and court demonstrated something his poor academic record failed to do: he was incredibly intelligent and capable when he wanted to be. The truth is, most of the time he just didn’t care. The exception was sports, which became a true obsession, which Chad shared to a slightly lesser extent.
As a result, the two muscular men who finished school barely resembled the two boys they once were. Topper cherished the photograph taken with his friend after their team winned the intramurals.
No, no, no! I’ve always been a good student; I have no idea what the rules of lacrosse are. I’ve never been to boarding school, and I’m certainly not some pretentious mountain of muscle who thinks he has the world at his feet," Cris thought.
"But I am," Topper replied, making Cris freak out, not knowing where the strange voice inside his head came from, while new memories flowed.
With the end of school and before college, which both boys would attend together, Archibald decided he wanted Chad by his side to instruct him in the truths of life or some such nonsense. As if Topper would let his brother be stuck in an office all summer. Negative. The two of them would have fun, even if he had to kidnap Chad to do so. Which wasn’t necessary, because once again, Carol Lauder Hawthorne used her magnificent powers of persuasion to ensure her beloved son had his best friend with him during those vacations, where they explored the Old Continent together, taking yacht trips through exclusive islands across the Mediterranean, a brief pause to ski in the Swiss Alps, and the cherry on top: the craziest sexual experiences in Eastern Europe.
“Ah man, the flexibility of that girl in Prague,” Topper reminisced fondly about that particular night.
“I’ve never been to Prague, or on a yacht, or in the Mediterranean, and I’d certainly break my legs if I tried skiing,” Cris argued.
“Nonsense, I’m a natural athlete,” Topper replied.
“But I’m not you,” Cris shot back, finally losing the ability to perceive the strangeness of the situation.
“Of course you are, you idiot. Who else would you be if not me? I’m such a dumbass!” Topper laughed inside Cris’s head, echoing:
“A dumbass, he he he.”
And suddenly, he also burst out laughing, their laughter mingling as if they were one.
After an unforgettable summer, college time finally arrived. Continuing the established partnership, the boys rented a luxurious apartment near the campus. Archibald had the nerve to try to send Chad to a shared dorm, as if Topper would allow it. He’d never agree to live in a dorm; he deserved the best, and the best was having Chad by his side. This time, Carol’s intervention wasn’t necessary; Archibald simply wasn’t informed of the arrangement, and what he didn’t know wouldn’t bother him. Of course, such an arrangement would be temporary. Both boys were legacies and would soon be inducted into their parents’ old fraternity.
Chad had no option but to choose business-oriented subjects to study, knowing ahead of time that his major would be in business. Topper briefly considered studying sports sciences due to his love of sports, but it wasn’t like he needed it, so why bother? He then decided to enroll in the same subjects as his friend without worrying much about it. After all, college was much more than listening to half a dozen stilted old-timers; it was about making contacts, having new experiences, and above all, having fun!
“But I’m a great student, and business? I’m going to be a writer, aren’t I?”
“Ha, I couldn’t even write the grocery list if I didn’t have someone to do the list and the shopping for me… and great student? I’m always great, even if the grades say otherwise. If I tried a little harder, I know they’d be a lot better, but it doesn’t make any difference in my life.”
“No, education is important!”
“Of course it is; that’s why I studied at the best schools and went to college. But those things only get you so far. When you want to go further, your name and your contacts do more for you than any major.”
Speaking of contacts, Chad and Topper were perfect fraternity material. The two made it through Hell Week unscathed, quickly rising within the organization.
Now, nearing the end of their junior year, the two held positions on the chapter’s board, strong competitors to assume the presidency.
“Not if I have anything to say about it.” Topper knew that one day he’d have to take responsibility for the family business, but he had no interest in taking on any real responsibility before it was necessary, and he wouldn’t let his best bro do it. Archibald would certainly put pressure on his son, having been president in his day, even if the sour old man never understood anything about what fraternal life really was. No, it was Topper’s duty to make sure his friend had some kind of fun. Helping organize the parties, managing the house, and guiding the newcomers, showing them the path to follow, was more than enough. Man, how he loved to see the terrified looks on the pledges when the blindfolds were taken off, and it was his face they saw first, not knowing they were looking at the guy who would make them men—the right kind of men. They were a family, after all, and he took great pride in being the cool big brother role model.
“It would’ve been nice to have so many friends, to feel part of something.”
“Yeah, man, I love this.”
However, not everything had been perfect; unexpectedly, the angel of death struck the pair of friends again. Sybil, Chad’s mother, died of a sudden illness. And suddenly, Topper found himself in the opposite position from so many years ago. Chad was a grown man and not a boy, yet Topper saw his long-ago image reflected in his friend’s sad eyes on the day of the funeral.
The funeral forced Chad to present himself in a way that his father found appropriate, making him say goodbye to the long hair and stubble he had developed in his time away from him. Topper, as a good friend, supported him, even though he didn't care in the slightest about the grumpy Archie's opinion. Knowing the power of a helping hand, he stayed by Chad’s side the entire time. This was a pain that could only be eased with time, so Topper decided to numb it the best way he knew how. That night, he took Chad to a bar with the intention of drinking him into a stupor.
“Thanks, bro. I don’t know what I’d do without you by my side… Oh god, I’m sounding like a crybaby.”
“Chad, your mom just passed away; today you have the right to look like a crybaby, dude. Which doesn’t justify you being one for all the years we’ve known each other, bro,” Topper replied with a smile.
“Asshole…” replied Chad with a sad smile.
“Speaking of assholes, how’s Uncle Archie doing?”
“Being himself, if you know what I mean? You’d think his wife’s death would soften the old man, but no, he didn’t even give me a hug…”
“I’d hug you, brother, if it put a real smile on your face. But I think I have a better solution.” Topper pointed to a pair of beautiful girls standing on the other side of the bar.
“Oh man, I don’t know…”
“They’re hot, bro. Look, your mom would want you to get on with your life, and right now you need a distraction, soooo… blond or brunette?”
“Both!” Chad replied with his first real smile in a while.
That was a wild night. To avoid unwanted attention from the parents, they took the two women to one of Topper’s apartments in the city, and there, washed down with a lot of alcohol and weed, the four of them ended up in bed in a foursome.
“That was freaking awesome.” Said Topper.
“Yeah, dude, freaking awesome.” Agreed Cris.
Chad spent the next few months in a mood that ranged from depressed to euphoric, usually with a little help from Topper, but gradually improving. Until a new blow hit the duo. On a sunny afternoon less than a week ago, during a college break, as the boys rode through the huge Hawthorne property, they were called by Carol for a chat.
“Boys, an announcement is coming soon, but both Archibald and I would like you to know in advance. This summer, he and I are getting married.”
“What the hell is this, Mom? Are you kidding?”
“Language, Christopher. And no, I’m not kidding. I’d like you to think of it as a… business arrangement—a very beneficial arrangement for both parties.”
“A beneficial arrangement? Mom, we have more than enough money.”
“Christopher, my dear, I raised you better than that; there’s no such thing as enough money.”
“And Aunt Sybil? Your best friend’s body has barely cooled down, and you’re ready to swoop in on her husband. Sorry, bro!” Topper concluded when he remembered who he was sitting next to. But the friend didn’t respond, preferring to direct his attention toward Carol.
“How long? How long have you two been planning this… arrangement, Carol?” The “aunt” was unceremoniously dismissed.
“Archibald and I have been discussing this for some time, and it’s going to be very profitable.”
“Profitable and convenient, isn’t it? You’re still a young woman—not even forty yet. And I must say you hid it wonderfully well, but now looking closely, I can’t help but notice the signs. When can Topper and I expect our brother or sister to be born?”
“Chadwick! How can you say…”
“Drop the act; only something like this would make sense!”
“Okay, I really am pregnant; I never imagined this could happen. Boys, you must understand, nothing happened between me and Archibald while Sybil was alive. Chad, his parents were my biggest source of support after Topper’s dad passed away. Sybil was truly my best friend, and when she left, I felt… empty. Imagine how you would feel without each other? Archibald may seem cold, but he also felt her loss, and in our grief, we ended up supporting each other. One thing led to another, and one night after a few glasses of wine, we ended up…”
“Fucking,” interrupted Topper!
“Christopher, that’s enough; I’m your mother, and I deserve respect.”
“Respect? How can you talk about respect after telling us this?”
“Topper, it’s okay; she’s right; there’s nothing more to be done. Getting rid of the baby isn’t an option; the scandal if this story leaks… I imagine the wedding will be soon, to allay suspicions, although it’ll probably still raise some eyebrows…”
“Yes, it’s the best arrangement we could come up with. Christopher, my dear, I’m really sorry, but it’s for the best. Besides, you always wanted a brother.”
“I already have a brother,” he replied, looking towards his friend.
“Yes, Christopher, and now you will indeed be brothers for real. Think about it. And you, Chad, Topper told me all about how you feel about Archibald, and I’m no idiot despite what anyone might think; I see the way he treats you. I can be a very powerful ally; never underestimate my powers of persuasion, especially when I’m carrying Archibald’s son. You may not believe it, but all his behavior comes from the hopes and expectations he has. It will be very good for you to have someone to share that weight with.”
“Just think about it, brother. We will be real brothers, on paper and in life, and with one more of us on the way. Doesn’t look so bad. Even more so if that way you can get your dad off your back,” Topper said, letting himself be carried away by his mother’s notorious power of persuasion without realizing it.
“Yeah, that wouldn’t be so bad, not really, brother,” Chad concluded, smiling back at his friend.
And so the two ended up at that event at the Country Club, where they had spent most of their lives, commemorating the future union of their parents, which would formalize their status as brothers. Topper arrived late, and accompanied by his friend, went to the locker room to put on appropriate clothes before heading to the ballroom. And now the two of them were there, face to face. Topper looking down at his friend’s distorted hand, the glowing red stone emanating constant waves.
“Quite a… quite a story… but… it’s not real… none of it is… real.” Cris reappeared, gathering what was left of his energy.
“Dude, of course, it’s real. If you want it, it’s real; I want it, and I’m you, so it’s real!”
“No… I’m not you… you’re an… invention, you’re nothing but… a rich asshole… who thinks he owns the world… who thinks… has… the world at his feet… your life is all about money… and… parties and…”
“And fun, and not worrying about tomorrow, and friends, real friends, and a mother who does whatever I want, and a brother—a real brother who was always there for me… how could that be something bad?”
“No… no… no… it wasn’t real… no… it couldn’t… be real…” Still, new memories rushed toward him, like a giant wave of red, flooding every inch of his consciousness until there was no empty space left.
Chad studied the face of the young man with glazed eyes and an empty expression sitting in front of him.
His hand burned with heat as he gripped the stone, and he couldn't help but think that maybe it was too much, that maybe he had messed up beautifully.
“It has to work, it has to work…” he muttered. Then the stone emitted its most wave, momentarily blinding him. Upon regaining his sight, he found himself in front of a completely different man. Sitting naked before him was an example of male perfection. A face that looked like it was carved from marble, golden hair in beautiful curls, with the broad, defined musculature of someone who could easily be a fitness model. For a moment terror dominated him, as it seemed that Christopher tried to resist the process with greater intensity, however it did not last more than an instant as another waves come and soon the gargantuan figure that replaced Cristian began to feel and test his gigantic muscles almost automatically with a distant and unfocused look, gradually being replaced by one of extreme confidence and arrogance. If Marvel ever decided to reboot Captain America, the man in front of him wouldn’t be a bad choice—except for the fact that he’d never put himself in that position… unless he thought he’d have fun with it.
And how did Chad know that? He knew this because he suddenly remembered a whole new life, which made his previous life look pale and gray—all thanks to the man in front of him, Topper, his best friend, his brother! And with a smile on his face, he woke him up to reality:
“Hey bro, you okay?”
“What? Chad, bro, sorry I kind of zoned out; damn jet lag. But it was worth it; you should’ve gone with me; Brazil is everything we were told.”
“Not everyone can afford to fly all the way to Rio and hook up with a supermodel whenever they want, bro.”
“True, but we can.”
“Speak, for you, brother.”
“I speak for both of us. If there's one good thing to come out of this whole situation, it's that my mom will get Archie off your back, and we'll finally be able to enjoy life the right way,” Topper concluded while opening a closet and pulling out some clothes. Putting on pristine white boxer briefs, more immaculate than a virgin's soul, but which ironically would make many virgins fall into sin just by looking at the man wearing them. Before putting the other garments he flexed both arms and admired himself in the mirror. “I’m so swole, man.”
“Something had to make up for the lack of brains, brother!”
“You only say that because you're jealous of me, tiny boy.”
"I wouldn't call anything about me tiny.”
“True, but nothing compares to my size, little brother!”
“Some of us prefer classic beauty, Topper.”
“And some of us decided to be real men, Chad.”
That was Topper's mocking response as he walked past his “brother" and gave him a playful pat in the groin.
“Dude, leave the gems alone!”
"Stop being a whiner, I wouldn't do anything to hurt my future nephews," Topper said as he admired himself... again. “Dude, I’m fucking hot!”
“I didn't know jt lag caused brain damage, bro. I thought we'd already been through this whole discussion about your ridiculous handsomeness. Be careful; you don’t have much brain in that head of yours to waste.”
"Asshole, your envy doesn't faze me, try as you might," he replied, finally putting on his suit, the same shade of blue as Chad's.
“So how are the lovebirds doing? I imagine the news about him having another boy to torment has given Archie a break from his usual boredom.”
“Incredibly, yes. Your mother really has a hold on my father; he pestered me a lot less than usual. Although I don't think he's very happy about your delay."
“I couldn't miss the chance to see Archie's eyes pop, especially since he knows he has no power over me. Soon, he won't have any power over you, and I promise you, he won't have any power over that baby either. When he’s born, you and I together are going to show the little one how to live. Now come here, brother; you may not be as handsome as I am, but we still make a great pair.”
….
The two returned to the hall together, always attracting attention from everyone around, but they were used to being the center of attention, and frankly, they deserved it!
They found their parents sitting together at a table, and to both their surprise, Archibald looked more relaxed than they had ever seen him, while Carol turned to both of them with a Cheshire smile.
“Hey boys, we have news. But since Christopher took up so much time, maybe we should save it for another moment…”
“Carol, boys will be boys, so let them be.” Archibald intervened, making the two boys look at each other in disbelief. His expression seemed softer and less predatory than usual.
“Anyway, what Carol was trying to say is we've decided to have the wedding in early summer in Malta, and the good news is you're going a few weeks in advance to get everything ready. We count on you—don’t hold back on effort or money,” Archibald concluded, not seeing the sly smile that Carol gave behind his back, which made the boys' jaws drop—metaphorically, of course, since neither of them would commit such an indignity in public.
….
And so it was that in early July, Chadwick Sutterland found himself enjoying the best that life had to offer on an exclusive Mediterranean island alongside his lifelong best friend, Christopher Hawthorne IV. Thinking about a red gem and gray fading memories of a reality that, for the world, had never existed. He had done really well, in his own opinion. His father was dominated, so much so that he didn't even bother with his son's behaviour in the last months. He had a fierce ally ahead of his family business, even more so now that she was expecting a Sutherland boy, who, when the moment came, he would deliver that stone to be used in a time of need. An unforeseen but very favorable outcome, the stone indeed acted in the best interest of the wielder if its power was allowed to act freely. And the greatest proof of that was his best friend, the brother he had gained, who was at his side talking to him at that very moment.
“Hey bro, what’s with the serious face? You should be enjoying your first real vacation paid for with your dad's money, dumbass,” Topper said with a smile.
“Fine, you asshole,” Chad replied, assuring himself the stone was safe and looking at his brother. “Let’s have some fun!
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down comes the night
synopsis: on a cold midnight in the dead of winter, gotham city's district attorney is murdered.
pairing: batman!bob floyd x fem!reader (lucky)
warnings: 18+ minors and ageless accounts dni, character death (obviously), mentions of death and mob violence, language (wc: 1K)
note: while i'm not planning to write a full series for batman bob – more like connected one shots and blurbs, because i can only focus on one series – i knew i absolutely had to write this scene, which has been in my head all week.
Tears are frozen in your lashes.
You saw him on Saturday. He was alive on Saturday. You saw him.
He wrapped an arm around your shoulders, mussed your hair like an annoying older brother and smacked a drunken and damp kiss on your cheek. He was alive.
"Did you hear me?" Bradley asks you – no, Commissioner Bradshaw asks you. His coat hangs around your shoulders, overly large on your frame, smelling like leather and coffee and cigar smoke. He doesn't smoke, or maybe Bradley just doesn't smoke around you.
He has always been so delicate around you. You still remember when another officer in the Major Crimes Division made some crass comment in front of you, and Bradley barked out a harsh, "Watch your mouth. You're in the presence of a lady," and silenced the room.
Or at least, until Jake smirked and not even bothering to look up from his paperwork, drawled, "Oh really? Where? I don't see any ladies around here. I only see Lucky."
You shot him a withering look, and Jake grinned, green eyes glittering in the dim yellow light of the office.
Bradley says your name again, breaking you from the warmth of the memory, plunging you back into the cold of the night, like a frozen surface of a lake, cracking under your weight.
You're so cold. Swallowing is almost painful.
You look at him, cheeks cold, eyes dim and lifeless. "How?"
A croak, barely audible, but Bradley pales. He opens his mouth, but Bradley's voice isn't the one that answers your question.
"A single shot to the back of the head."
His voice is low and hoarse and if the circumstances were different, kind of attractive. He sounds like cigar smoke and aged whiskey, deep and solid.
You've only seen him a few times.
You'd come looking for Jake up here once and found him up here – up here with him. He spotted you before Jake did and sidled back into the shadows, ready to disappear, and Jake looked over his shoulder.
"That's just Lucky. She's good," Jake reassured him. He beckoned you forward with a waved palm. You quietly handed him a styrofoam cup of coffee and watched the shadows. He watched you back, silent and watchful.
You've never heard his voice before.
Under different circumstances.
You don't have the luxury of different circumstances. You only have these.
"Execution style?"
He says nothing, which might as well be a confirmation.
"A mob hit?"
You can only see the bottom half of his face in his mask. His mouth looks vaguely impressed, pitched to the side.
You recall, "He slipped a USB into my clutch on Saturday. He must've done it when I wasn't paying attention or something."
You remember Jake's arm around your shoulders, his lips warm on your cheek, on your hairline.
"He left me a video. He said..."
Trust Bradshaw and Batman. No one else. Everyone else is on a payroll, kid. You suck in a breath and do your best not to cry again. Moisture stings your eyes. Damn.
"He knew, didn't he? He was making plans. He must've known."
You know what Jake would say now.
Everyone wants to kill a District Attorney in Gotham, Lucky. We might as well make, 'Mob bosses want me dead,' the new re-election slogan.
You can almost hear his voice, can almost see his grin.
Bradley nods. "Someone always wants to kill a good D.A., but yeah, Jake knew. He always knew."
You scoff.
Of course, Jake knew.
Jake knew and didn't run. Didn't enter protective custody. Didn't do anything but show up in the court room and smile in the faces of the men who wanted him dead. Damn him and his reckless righteousness. Damn him.
"Hey, Lucky..." Bradley looks sideways into the shadows. "You should probably call in sick for the rest of the week." You look at him sharply, and Bradley holds up his hands in a placating gesture. "You could be in danger. These are dangerous people. We don't know who exactly Jake pissed off."
You could almost laugh. Who didn't Jake piss off?
"He'd want you to be safe, is all," Bradley finishes, stuffing his hands in his pockets, shoulders hunched. Moonlight glints off of the silver badge at his hip.
You look at him dully. "Jake didn't run. Why should I?"
"And now Jake's dead," Bradley says softly.
And now Jake is dead.
He won't ruffle your hair or grab you coffee in the mornings. He's dead. He's dead.
You abruptly shake your head, almost robotically. Cross your arms.
"I'm an Assistant District Attorney. I can help."
"No," Bradley responds immediately. "For all we know, someone in the DA's office is crooked. You start poking around all of the sudden and..."
He doesn't need to finish that sentence. You could end up like Jake.
You bite down on your lip and cast your gaze into the shadows. "You. What'd Jake say I'd do?"
Batman looks at you, serious and searching, for a long moment, which feels even longer under his gaze. "You'd help. He said, if something were to happen to him, you'd help."
You hold his gaze. "Then I'll help."
And out of the corner of your eye, Bradley sighs.
Bradley leaves before you. He gets a call and heads downstairs – but not before offering to have one of his men drive you home whenever you're ready, which makes you smile weakly.
You expect him to leave soon after. You're surprised when Batman lingers.
You ignore him, mostly, watching the glittering snow dance and glimmer and fall in the wind, pinpricks of reflected light in the darkness, almost like stars.
"He..."
And Batman hesitates.
And damn, isn't that something? Isn't it something to see a masked vigilante – a feared predator, a scourge of the underworld – measure his words?
"He was... a good man. He was my friend. I'm sorry."
You stare. You don't blink. You barely even breathe.
"Thank you."
He dips his chin in a nod – his strong chin – and in the edges of the brightness pouring from the spotlight on the roof of the GCPD building – which bears his symbol, a sign of hope and fear, depending on who bears witness – you swear you catch a glimpse of blue in his eyes.
Before you can look closer, can step closer, Batman is gone, melting into the shadows again, disappearing into the dark and bleak night in a rush of wind.
Standing here alone – without him – feels even colder somehow.
note: will i wish i'd edited this in the morning? probably. do i care right now? not at all. also, down comes the night is now the official name for this universe, which i love, but of course, batman bob is always acceptable 😌
summoning a few friends who might be interested: @sometimesanalice @roosterbruiser @callsignspark @rhettabbotts @yanna-banana @ryebecca @withahappyrefrain
#batman!bob#bob floyd x reader#bob floyd x you#robert floyd x you#robert floyd x reader#robert floyd fic#fic: down comes the night#bob floyd fic#laracrofted writes
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Why exactly did they decide to make Aegon SA the maid? In the books he never assaults anyone. He is known to have a “large carnal appetite” but it’s never mentioned that these women were forced in anyway. The closest we get is when we hear that he won the virginities of two maidens at an auction in flea bottom. Which, by my understanding, means he paid extra to be a whore’s first customer. It wasn’t some sweet innocent girl like we see in the show. The girls already worked in the brothel learning their trade. They don’t just yoink girls off the street and out their virginity up for sale.
So why include it in the show? Was it because they realized Aegon wasn’t nearly as horrible as Rhaenyra, so they had to do something?
Rhaenyra has 3 bastards that everyone knows about, but can’t say anything. Just committing open treason and no one is allowed to point it out.
She had beef with a literal 2 year old. She had multiple tantrums at her little brothers second name day hunt. Also looked right at him and compared the death squeals of a boar to the crying to children.
Suspected of killing her first husband. In the show, she shows Laenor mercy, but has no problem killing off one of his servants because they needed a body. You don’t understand! She reconnected with her uncle by fucking him on the beach at his late wife’s funeral! She just HAD to marry Daemon instead! Who cares that Laenor was in the process of recommitting himself to their marriage when she sprung this idea on him? He gets to live penniless with his boyfriend in Pentos or something! All he had to do was give up his family, his inheritance, his power, his place at court and all his wealth, along with the life of one of his father’s servants. Sure, he could have kept all those things, but then Daemon would get all broody about how he can’t openly fuck his niece!
Her second eldest is adamant he doesn’t want the Driftwood throne. She forces him to fight for it anyway rather than just quietly sending word that Luke is willing to allow Vaemond to inherit in his place.
Suggesting Aemond be tortured to learn where he heard her sons being called bastards after Luke just slashed out his eye. Not to mention that snobby “Thank you, father” that was totally inappropriate, unnecessary and sent Alicent over the edge.
In comparison, Aegon is a teenage boy who… likes drinking and jerking it. The worst thing he has done was mock his brother with a pig. Alicent corrects this behavior, and from what I can tell, the two boys were friendly towards each other after the time jump. Aemond and Aegon are chatting before dinner. Aemond stands to defend Aegon when Jace acts like he may try something. When Aemond gets punched by Jace and then pushes him to the ground, Aegon grabs Luke before he can do anythjng. Clearly they have grown close.
We see the twins at the fighting pit where Aegon allegedly goes often. How can they know that, though? Earlier in that episode Otto asks his personal guard (either Erryk or Arryk. Their names sound the same and they have the same face, I don’t know who is who) where he is and his guard admits that Aegon exploits his authority to order him away and then evades him. He admits he doesn’t have a clue what he gets up to. Then, later we see a boy with blonde hair and purple eyes, and it’s Aegon’s. No doubt in anyone’s mind. Clearly Aegon is knowingly breeding child fighters for the pit. Weird how he wasn’t there, though.
Matter of fact, the white worm just found him drunk off his ass and stashed him in the sept. That’s what he was getting up to. Getting drunk and likely paying for sex.
Now let’s analyze the scene where Alicent confronts Aegon.
Alicent is IRATE and Aegon is half asleep. Looks like he hasn’t moved in a while, tbh. Aegon asks if something happened. Don’t you think he would know if he did something? His mother reminds him about Dyana, and he seems very nonchalant about it. Not the kind of reaction you would expect from someone that just forced himself on a struggling servants. He saw it as just a bit of fun. His reaction just seems… off.
Now, we know GRRM likes to repeat plot points. One in the original series was Cersei only laying with Robert when he was drunk so she could finish him off some other way, and he wouldn’t remember. Aegon is a known drunk. There were no witnesses. Who’s to say Dyana isn’t a spy or a mole sent to fuck shit up?
She is in season 2. Why bring back an SA victim in season 2 if she doesn’t have more to add to the story? Sure, there could be a revenge arc, but from my understanding, Dyana is at a brothel in season 2. Now, did she wind up there after the Aegon incident (hard to believe considering she was given a pouch of coin to start a new life and she only made it to the end of the palace driveway) OR she went back to where she came from. Back to her mistress, the White Worm. We see she employs young women in her service. Who’s to say they didn’t make the whole thing up to try and sway more people towards Rhaenyra’s cause? Nothing makes a man look worse than SA.
So all the horrible things Aegon has done so far, has been hearsay. We don’t see anything other than him bullying Aemond when they were kids. So either the writers had to do something totally awful with his character, or it wouldn’t be such a landslide siding for Rhaenyra.
You know if they hadn’t decided to assassinate his character, it would be much closer to a 50/50 split. They also had to whitewash the hell out of Rhaenyra to make her more likable. In the books, SHE orders Vaemond’s death and feeds him to her dragon. So in the same episode they blackwashed Aegon and whitewashed Rhaenyra so the audience would root for her. Then they had the balls to say WITH THEIR WHOLE CHEST that they aren’t biased in their writing.
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Geneviève d’Eon & Marie-Jeanne Bertin: Clothing and Gender in 18th Century France
"After being fully dressed by famous designer Rose Bertin for the first time, they ran to their room and cried for hours." ~ Kaz Rowe, The Chevalier d'Eon: the Trans 18th Century Spy
Kaz Rowe throws this story out there in their video on d'Eon as a part of their justification in using they/them pronouns for d'Eon who used she/her pronouns. Rowe never really explains the context for this story. It sounds dramatic on the surface, d'Eon spent hours crying over being forced into women's clothes. But did this really happen?
This story comes from d'Eon's own autobiographical writings that she never finished. Segments of her drafts were translated and published by Roland A. Champagne, Nina Ekstein, and Gary Kates in The Maiden of Tonnerre. The title comes from d'Eon who styled herself la pucelle de Tonnerre after Joan of Arc who was known as la pucelle d'Orléans.
Some things to consider before we start:
D'Eon's autobiographical writings operate under the pretence that she was afab and raised as a boy for inherence reasons. We have to remember that these writings are heavily fictionalised, a necessity in upholding the lie that allowed d'Eon to live as a woman. However that doesn't mean that there is no historical value in these writings. Instead of simply taking these stories as fact we must consider: Why is d'Eon presenting this story in this way? How does this story serve the narrative d'Eon is constructing for herself?
D'Eon in this story claims she had never worn women's clothing before. This is contradicted by d'Eon's own claim of infiltrating the court of Empress Elizabeth of Russia as a woman. While its hard to pinpoint the exact moment d'Eon first wore women's clothes I personally suspect it was much earlier than this.
D'Eon also includes a scene where she is bathed by Bertin's assistants. This scene is almost certainly fictional as if it happened in reality this would reveal that d'Eon had a penis, a fact she wanted to keep secret. This scene is almost certainly included to add to the 'evidence' that d'Eon was afab.
Considering these points we must consider that this story did not take place literally as d'Eon depicts it. Instead of taking this story as an accurate recollection of events I consider it a fictionalised story (based on true events). The goal in my analysis is to ask what is d'Eon trying to communicate though this story.
Some background information to add context:
D'Eon had prior to this incident signed a transaction with Louis XVI in which she was legally acknowledged as a woman and ordered by Louis XVI to wear woman's clothes. D'Eon agreed to "declaring publicly my sex, to my condition being established beyond a doubt, to resume and wear female attire until death," but then adds "unless, taking into consideration my being so long accustomed to appear in uniform, his Majesty will consent, on sufferance only, to my resuming male attire should it become impossible for me to endure the embarrassment of adopting the other". (see D'Eon de Beaumont, his life and times by Alfred Rieu, p174-182 for an English translation of the transaction)
We also must consider that d'Eon did not dispute the fact that she was a woman when signing the transaction, nor does she dispute this in her autobiographical writings. D'Eon was very much arguing that she, as a woman, should be allowed to continue to wear men's clothing (specifically her dragoon uniform) as that is what she was used to wearing and comfortable wearing.
Also mentioned in the following excerpt is the English trial over d'Eon's sex in which it was found that d'Eon was a woman. I'm not going to get too into the topic here as it's a whole other can of worms. However I think it's important to understand that while d'Eon had issues with aspects of the trial she would use the ruling to support her claim that she was afab.
The Maiden of Tonnerre: Chapter VII
Selections from the great interview between Mademoiselle Bertin and Mademoiselle d'Eon in Paris on October 21, 1777 Mademoiselle Bertin. I have come vary early in the morning to spare you trouble and embarrassment. But what else can I do? You must either go through this or through the gates of a convent. Mademoiselle d'Eon. It is easy to do otherwise. Just leave me as I am. I have lived for forty-eight years this way. I cannot live all that much longer. I am impatiently awaiting the great change that will transform us all making all of us eternally equal. Mademoiselle Bertin. The Court in its patience will never have the endurance to wait that long. Remember that it was a deliberate error on the part of your father, your mother, and yourself that resulted in Mademoiselle d'Eon's wearing men's clothing and a military uniform. But since that time things have changed considerably, and today by order of King and the law, the bad boy must become a good girl.
It's interesting that here d'Eon has Bertin distinguish between "men's clothing" and "military uniform". As women were not allowed in the French military at this time all French military uniforms were as such men's clothing. But d'Eon did not simply want to wear men's clothing she wanted to wear her military uniform.
Mademoiselle d'Eon. If I was a boy by mistake, one could inadvertently allow me to continue to be one. While you are correct about the substance of the matter, I am not wrong about the form. Mademoiselle Bertin. That is not possible now. Your trial created too much of a stir. Mademoiselle d'Eon. I am a reliable bugler in my squadron. I am not frightened by noise. The Court's behaviour, by its very decency, has wound up being indecent. I would have thought that the King would have been willing to allow me to wear the uniform of a former dragoon captain, Knight of Saint Louis, and plenipotentiary minister, since he was kind enough to allow me to wear the cross of the royal and military order of Saint Louis on my dress. Do you see how everything at court is so arbitrary? There one could say every day: Contraria contrariis opponuntur [A contrary opposes other contraries].
Again we see the focus is that d'Eon wanted to wear her dragoon uniform. She likens this directly to her cross of Saint Louis which Louis XVI did permit her to wear on her women's clothes. As the cross of Saint Louis was only awarded to men it is arguably also menswear. D'Eon is pointing out the arbitrary nature of this distinction. Why is she permitted to wear an idem of menswear, the cross of Saint Louis, but not another, her dragoon uniform. To d'Eon these both represent her achievements rather than manhood, she is arguing that she, a woman, should be allowed to wear them.
Mademoiselle Bertin. I concede that every day we see in the streets of Paris a tall young woman in the uniform of a dragoon publicly giving lessons on the use if arms. But remember that this girl was a mere dragoon and that she had no other way to earn a living. To do so, she had written permission to dress as a dragoon form the lieutenant general of the Paris police. But the Court would never grant such permission for a young woman from a good family who had been in France and in foreign courts as Mademoiselle d'Eon has been. Mademoiselle d'Eon. In a well-regulated country, the law must not allow preferential treatment to anyone. Mademoiselle Bertin. You can go to Versailles to argue with the Chancellor of France, your former schoolmate. But with Mademoiselle Bertin, it can serve no purpose to argue. Do not take this matter so far as to have a falling out with the King's ministers or the royal Treasury. Remember, Mademoiselle, that in France a maiden who obeys the law and the King must wear her dress and petticoat, whether to remain in this world or to spend her time in the convent. Mademoiselle d'Eon. Your advice is wise and prudent. I would rather follow you into the royal Treasury than into a convent. Mademoiselle Bertin. My honorable captain, don't think that you are dishonored by having been found to be a woman. The discomfiture is temporary, and the glory will be with you forever. But let us not wast uselessly the precious time needed to begin and end your outfitting before the return of Major Varville. Mademoiselle d'Eon. I see that Mademoiselle Bertin is correct about all that she says and does and that a lady-in-waiting to the Queen is thus wiser in her comportment and in her begetting than all the children of the Enlightenment and all the captains of the army. Without delaying further and having followed the instructions of Mademoiselle Bertin, the Dragoon was, in a short period of time, divested of his serpent's skin and transformed into an angel of light. Her head became as lustrous as the sun. Her whole outlook on things changed as much as did her face. No trace of the dragoon remained in her. Mademoiselle Bertin thought she was consoling me by saying: "The Queen doesn't despise bravery in a well-born maiden. But out of duty she prefers to find in her decency, honor, and virtue. If Louis XV armed you as a Knight of French soldiers, Louis XVI arms you as a chevalière of French women. And the Queen crowns your wisdom by commanding me to bring to you this new armor, which must accompany your coiffure and your demeanor so that you may become the leading general of all the honorable women of France. The time has come for us to be edified and not scandalized by Mademoiselle d'Eon's conduct. Why don't you offer up your uniform as a sacrifice at Notre Dame de Paris or in your holy anger throw it out the window in order to stand witness before the people of Israel, the Parisians, the Scribes, and the Pharisees that you are now following the letter of the law that Moses gave us in his commandments." While Mademoiselle Bertin had me get into the bath to be washed, soaped and scrubbed down by her companions, I told her: "Proceed as quickly as possible; do not waste time with the preparations so that I too may keep part of my own dignity as it is joined with yours and that of your seamstresses. Virtuous Bertin, honest messenger form the chamber of the Queen, I fully realize that the hour is at hand for me to follow the directive of the law and the King. As a victim, I am offered up in sacrifice since you do me harm in order to do me good. All women are going to point at me, and all the maidens are going to thumb their noses at me when they see me dressed in style and done up like a doll or at the very least like a Vestal Virgin who is led to the marriage altar."
We see in this excerpt Bertin acts as an authority ushering d'Eon into womanhood, the transformation is painful but ultimately positive for d'Eon; "you do me harm in order to do me good". But there is this real fear of being mocked by other women. At least part of d'Eon's trepidation to don women's clothes comes form the fear of humiliation. We see this fear also reflected in the transaction when she begs King Louis to "consent, on sufferance only, to my resuming male attire should it become impossible for me to endure the embarrassment of adopting the other".
Mademoiselle Bertin. Put aside your concerns about what other will say. Must what the mad say prevent us from being wise? Mademoiselle d'Eon. Alas, at court everything is beautiful. To please the court, does a former captain have to become a pretty boy [demoiseau]? Mademoiselle Bertin. Yes, absolutely, when the so-called "boy" is discovered to be in fact a girl by the systems of justice both in England and in France. Mademoiselle d'Eon. Speaking of justice, is Mademoiselle Bertin, the Queen's servant, also the enforcer of justice? Mademoiselle Bertin was stung. "Don't be angry," I told her, "I simply wanted you to acknowledge, for you are just in all matters, that I cannot fit into the dress you brought me." Mademoiselle Bertin remained disconcerted for a moment. But she soon regained her composure and said to me: "If you are a patient girl, the dress that I made for you in the name of Justice will soon be taken out to fit you. And I predict for you that the certainty of happiness will come form the alleged abyss of your unhappiness." Then, looking pleased with herself, she said to me: "I am glad about having stripped you of your armor and your dragoon skin in order to arm you from head to toe with your dress and finery. In you I have found the power to possess the benefit of simple tonsure without a papal dispensation. Give thanks to God. You can assuredly double your chances of attaining eternal life, for which all of us search amidst this life's sorrows, troubles and suffering. Tomorrow you will suffer less, and the following day you will not suffer at all. In a little while, you will enjoy the relaxation and the joy that are the natural prerogatives of a Catholic girl who loyally follows the breviary of Rome and Paris, which was annotated, revised, and made available to the Daughters of Holy Mary and the Queen's women. You are not yet canonized, but soon you will be beatified when your upcoming marriage is canonically approved. Better this for you than a cannon shot."
D'Eon at this time was considering joining a convent. Bertin is referring to d'Eon's marriage to Christ.
Mademoiselle d'Eon. You can even say that regarding a hail of cannon shots. ... But when I reflect on my past and present states, I will never have the courage to go out in public dressed as you have me. You have illuminated and brightened me up so much that I dare not look at myself in the mirror that you brought me. Mademoiselle Bertin. A room is not lit up in order to hide it or to keep it in the dark, but rather it is placed beneath a chandelier so that those who enter can see the light and be edified by your conversion. Mademoiselle d'Eon. I know that there is nothing hidden that should not be revealed or anything secret that cannot be known. Therefore, I will not seek my own willpower but that of the King who sent you here to Mademoiselle d'Eon to change what is bad into something good. Since he obliges me to choose the best way, it will not be taken away from me. What is worth choosing is worth maintaining. When you came to me, I thought you were bringing me death. Now I go to you in order to be alive, because I am no longer chasing after the false vainglory of the dragoons, but after the solid glory of maidens of pease. I am no longer looking for my own glory. There is another who is seeking it for me and is judging it. This order is the most Christian King following the opinion of his Council and his apostolic Sanhedrin, who grants me glory so that I myself might experience that God's will is perfect, that will of the law is just, the King's will is good, and that of the Queen pleasant, decent, and proper, because the Son of Man came to save what was lost. After this conversation, I quickly left the room and hurried to my bedroom, where I wept bitterly. Mademoiselle Bertin closely followed me and uselessly proposed both a drink and smelling salts in order to console me. I stopped crying only when my tears naturally dried up. Mademoiselle Bertin, as a crafty member of the Court, took advantage of my weekness by saying: "You are certainly not unaware of the joy experienced by the public in Paris when they heard sung the verses about the Heroine from Tonnerre, which were recently printed and are being sung throughout France." That was the only thing that calmed me in my distress, for when a heart is not entirely dedicated to God it is partly attached to this world. Only vanity can console such an individual because this world prefers human glory to the divine.
And so that it. Thats the moment that d'Eon "cried for hours" after being dressed by Mademoiselle Bertin. So what is d'Eon trying to communicate to the reader in this excerpt?
"When you came to me, I thought you were bringing me death. Now I go to you in order to be alive" is a key part of d'Eon's speech to Bertin, it mirrors an earlier moment in chapter VI where d'Eon says to Bertin "You have killed my brother the dragoon. That leaves me with a heavy heart." In order for d'Eon to become a woman the man or more precisely the dragoon must be killed. D'Eon tries to hang onto both womanhood and her identity as a dragoon but she isn't allowed to.
She cries in morning for the loss of the dragoon she once was and is only cheered by Bertin reminding her that she is now a Heroine. However the d'Eon who is narrating this story criticises her past self for vanity. We see this thought continued in the next chapter:
There is no doubt that it would have been preferable, for my happiness in this world and my salvation in the one to come, had my investiture taken place forty years earlier, because the dragoon disease is so deeply rooted in me that I greatly fear that our saintly Madame Louise will unite with our holy Archbishop, the good Marquis de l'Hôpital, and his pious spouse to have me put away in a hospital for the incurable.
D'Eon presents her transformation into womanhood at the hands of Mademoiselle Bertin as a painful experience but ultimately a necessary and good one that brought her happiness in the long term. I'll leave off with d'Eon's words:
That was all I could respond to Mademoiselle Bertin's questions, whether they were hers alone or form on high. I answered them in a satisfactory manner according to my system of moderation, so appropriate to my position and to the disposition that heaven has inspired in me, and not that of the dragoon, which I drove out of my clothes and away from the wardrobe that the honorable messenger of the Queen had brought me. Thus I can say without flattery that Mademoiselle Bertin is the best of the women who can be found at the Court, in the city, in Picardy, in France, and in the world. My dear Mademoiselle Bertin, it will soon be midnight return to rejoin your forty Virtues as if it were midday.
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"But, for at least part of the 1999-2000 TV season, Freaks And Geeks was a beacon to anyone whose high school experience was awkward, boring, humbling, or painful—basically, anything other than the sexy and stylish depictions that had dominated teen-centered movies and shows. It begins with a feint in the pilot episode, one of best series introductions ever. Director Jake Kasdan scans the high school track, seeking out a very blond football player (Gabriel Carpenter, in a role not unlike his appearance in 1999’s Drive Me Crazy) who’s confessing his affection to a very blond cheerleader in the bleachers. This early encounter is the extent to which Freaks And Geeks would engage with the kind of prepossessing teens who were frequently the subjects of these shows. This decision, Feig tells The A.V. Club, was based on having “grown up on such a diet of teen stuff being about beautiful people who were so cool with everything, including sex. It didn’t reflect anything I grew up around. You would see those kids; they were around. But they weren’t my group. They weren’t the majority of the kids that I knew.”
The camera ventures under the bleachers, where Daniel Desario (James Franco) is holding court among the other “freaks,” before panning over to our protagonist, Lindsay Weir (Linda Cardellini), who’s lurking nearby, ever between groups. The camera keeps moving, settling on an altercation between the “geeks”—Lindsay’s brother, Sam (John Francis Daley), and his friends Bill Haverchuck (Martin Starr) and Neal Schweiber (Samm Levine)—and a bully named Alan (The Sandlot’s Chauncey Leopardi). Lindsay comes to their rescue, but inadvertently offends Sam by referencing his diminutive stature. Lindsay is insulted by Alan’s buddies for her trouble, and Sam stalks off. This opening scene is a prime example of the brand of subversion found in Feig’s good-hearted show. A lesser series would have dedicated at least five minutes to Lindsay making up her mind, either in approaching the freaks or standing up for her brother. In Feig’s pilot, Lindsay acts decisively and still gets it wrong, which is not how this is supposed to go—that is, not on network television, and certainly not on the powerhouse network that was NBC in the late ’90s.
That was far from the last time Freaks And Geeks would defy expectations. In the same episode, we learn Lindsay is in the midst of an existential crisis brought on by her grandmother’s death. Hearing from her grandmother, the kindest and best person Lindsay had ever known, that there was nothing waiting on the “other side” leaves her questioning everything. So the former mathlete goes looking for answers in unlikely places, including under the bleachers and on the “smoking patio” with the freaks. Lindsay bonds with the freaks, especially Kim Kelly (Busy Philipps), whose depths were just as filled with teen-girl fury as insecurity. She even manages to win over the caustic Ken Miller (Seth Rogen). But her behavior flummoxes her parents, Harold (Joe Flaherty) and Jean (Becky Ann Baker), and to a lesser extent, her brother. Lindsay’s quest, which unfolded over the course of the season, was probably just as baffling for NBC executives (and possibly viewers). She wasn’t mollified by a new relationship with sweet stoner Nick Andopolis (Jason Segel), nor did she quickly learn her lesson and return to her high-achieving best friend Millie’s (Sarah Hagan) side. The absence of easy answers became a defining element of Lindsay’s life, as well as of the show.
But Freaks And Geeks was always just as optimistic as it was realistic, which is a key part of its enduring appeal. It’s a show about survival, about how a found community can help you muddle through anything. Despite the labels, Feig’s characters are all basically good people—failing that, they’re people who are capable of doing better."
Danette Chavez, "Why Freaks and Geeks Is the Teen Show that Endures"
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A Thousand Ways
Chapter 15: "Bloodlines"
The dream isn't done yet, and neither is the exposing of the extent of their bloodlines.
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Not expecting the cold grass to become hardwood, Legend startled as his surroundings changed. He looked at his new surroundings and covered his mouth, a sob choking his throat.
It was the farmhouse, his grandparents’ farmhouse. There, sitting on the sofa was a woman who looked too much like Dusk, just like how the man—his father, he’d known that the moment he made actual eye contact with him—looked too much like Twlight.
She was holding the infant in a blue blanket, and Legend knew that was him. He knew that blanket, only a month ago it was draped over the back of his desk chair, a few stains and a patch on it, but still in good condition... well worn and well used.
This woman... that was his mother, his actual mother. She was the woman who birthed him, and from the looks of it, she had done so not that long ago. She was paler than even Fable, who spent most of her days indoors.
“You should rest,” Grandma said as she came around with a wooden mug.
His mother shook her head. “He’s so small… Zelda had been bigger than him, though she hasn’t grown that much since.”
“He’ll grow when he’s older, goddesses know his father did,” Grandma gave a warm laugh that contrasted the puffiness and redness of her eyes. “Link grew so fast I never had time to alter his clothes when he was young, I have so many of his old clothes in the attic.”
“You’ll make good use of it, then,” she said quietly.
Grandpa entered the room. “Ya sure about this, Zelda? That boy’s gonna need his Momma.”
“And he’ll have her,” she assured. “But for now, until I can remove Agahnim from Hyrule, he won’t be safe at the castle. That man had my guards under his thumb in mere moments, I must defeat him first, and… And I won’t be ready to do so for some time. Not to mention the already existent stigma for princes… Until then, you must protect him.”
She looked down at the sleeping infant in her arms.
“That cursed wizard told the court my second child will bring about Hyrule’s downfall,” she revealed, “but that is a lie. Every seer I spoke to, every vision of his future I had, was clear—he will save Hyrule, he will be her hero.” She brushed the infant’s face, causing him to squirm slightly. “But until then… he’s just a boy, and even after, he will always be my son.”
“I know,” Grandma whispered. “We will take care of him, he’s our grandson after all. You take care of that usurper, my dear, we’ll be waiting to give this little one back to his mother.”
“Link,” Queen Zelda said, still not looking away from the baby. “His name is Link… isn’t it, my dear kit? You have the spirit of a hero, but that soul is far more sacred.”
Not much more was said until a wolf’s howl could be heard from outside, Queen Zelda sighed as she rose and passed the baby over to Grandma. She hugged her, kissed the baby once more, and hugged Grandpa, bidding goodbyes as she did so before leaving, promising to handle Agahnim and return soon.
“Be safe,” Grandpa told her.
“I will,” she promised. “Oh, I forgot,” she turned back and pulled out a bunny plush the size of the infant, a plush that Legend had tucked away in his bag, a little burnt from the fire that he'd found beneath a roasted chair, “this is his... Zelda picked it out at the markets for him... please, protect him.”
He still had that plush, it survived the fire, it was sitting in his bag--
With that, she opened the door to leave.
Legend tried to chase her, tried to scream, cry out and tell her: "Don’t!" He wanted to tell her that she would fail, that she would die, and leave both him and Zelda orphans.
Legend surged up. He gasped for air. The blankets fell to the floor with a muffled thud as he shoved them off of him. Memories of where he was—an inn, Twilight’s era, Telma’s bar—rushed to him as the scenes of that dream, that vision, dragged him down. Even then, everything around him drowned out, the room itself, his sight of it, any noises, vanished as his heart beat loudly in his chest. His blood roared in his ears, and he tried vainly to fill his lungs with air.
He’d seen his grandparents. He had seen his grandparents who had died in a fire not two weeks ago. More than that, he had seen his parents.
A father he had never seen before today, not even a portrait. Yet he saw the man fighting to his last breath just to protect him. His father who had recognized him despite the son he knew not being alive for more than a day. He met, however briefly, his father who had said he was proud of him. With no knowledge of anything Legend had done, his father took one look at Legend and said he was proud.
Then his mother who he was realizing he had recognized. The way he immediately trusted Dusk, that woman's magical signature felt identical to Dusk's. His mother held him close and promised to return soon. His mother who swore to bring retribution upon the man who caused her husband’s death and put her children in danger. His mother who had just given birth but still rode out to the farmhouse just so she could hold her son... then ride back to the castle and die by Agahnim’s hand.
It went back to Agahnim. It always went back to Agahnim. Everything that went truly wrong in his life went back to that cursed mage. His life had been Agahnim’s fault from the very beginning.
He wanted to sob, he wanted to scream.
Someone grabbed him.
He twisted, fire blazing in his hand as he tried to fight back--and froze.
“Kit, look at me,” his... a man said softly as Legend felt the ground come up to his body too quickly.
Twilight. That was Twilight, his fellow hero. Someone he'd only met a few years ago. It was Twilight, Forest, the Rancher, the Goatherd, their resident country boy and animal lover. It wasn't...
“I am so sorry," Twilight breathed.
He didn't understand. He didn't get it. Why was he sorry? What happened? Did he do something? Did something go wrong?
“We saw it, you couldn’ see us, but we could see you and them,” Twilight told him, one hand cradling his face and the other prying his nails from his palm. “That was yer family, wudinit?”
Legend made a strangled sound trying to speak, “G-Gran—”
“I know,” Twilight whispered. “I know, Kit. It ain’t fair."
Suddenly, all his previous attempts to shove things down, to wait until the quest was over to handle it, they all failed. His weak wall shattered. He threw himself into Forest's arms, seeking some kind of comfort. He needed help. He needed something that didn’t hurt. He needed something that made it stop, that ceased the ripping in his heart. Goddesses please, just make it stop hurting.
They were right there, goddesses above, they had been right there.
His grandparents were right there. Their home, their life, he'd been late by minutes, moments. He had been right there!
How was he a hero? How could he be a hero? How could he save anyone when he always, always failed to save those he loved? How can the goddesses expect him to keep their world safe when he can't even protect his own family?
Wood and straw popped in the fire, flames dancing to some unknown rhythm and song. Flames felt no pain, no loss, no hurt. He watched them dance, watched the rippling shadows they cast against the back of the fireplace, the smoke that trickled up into the chimney, and the ash that stained the mantle. Fire, life as much as death, and right now he didn't know which he wanted it to represent.
They were still at the inn, now taking up the seating area by the warm hearth, and Legend couldn't take his eyes of the flames. Vividly, he could see his grandparents in them; his grandmother releasing that horrid cry she gave when she found her son dead as she was burned alive.
A weight settled beside him, and unsurprisingly Twilight apparently decided not to let him out of his sight since they—because they had seen it too—returned from that awful vision.
Wild appeared too. He offered Legend a mug and he raised a questioning eyebrow.
“Tea,” the champion said, “Miss Telma made it, said it helped with nightmares. Everyone’s getting a cup.”
With the explanation, he accepted the mug and sipped it.
Nobody said a word with the tension as thick as it was, though equally as hard to notice in the first place. Their group wasn't quiet when gathered like this, at least not since the early days of gathering. The only time they were was when Twilight had been deathly injured. It just wasn't how they worked. Legend knew that.
Most were in their own thoughts, others were quietly murmuring or signing to someone else, and Legend wasn't bothering to try and keep up with the rapid movements even if he caught some words and signs just by exposure.
Until Wind decided to break it.
“Hey, Apple?”
Several people tensed, Warriors shot Wind a warning look that cowed the younger hero.
“Yeah?” He ignored the defensiveness from the other heroes.
“I… I wanted to—”
“Sailor,” Wild hissed. Wind pressed on.
“—ask about that… dream… thing.”
“I think it's pretty obvious,” he glared at the smoke-stained mantle. “That was someone’s idea of either a joke or a torture method.”
Twilight and Sky both flinched whilst Warriors grimaced. Noted, they didn't like it when he mentioned torture.
Wind frowned but didn't push.
“Those were my grandparents,” he said in offer of actual explanation. “The older couple, and the house too, or at least, it looked like them. The other two…”
“Looked like the Rancher,” Wild filled in.
“And Zelda,” Twilight added quietly.
Legend didn't respond to that, not for a long minute.
“He was younger than you, Rancher,” he finally said. “And you're alive.”
“We’ve talked about multiple timelines before,” Wind muttered, definitely not intending to be heard by the way he ducked his head when eyes glanced in his direction. “Jus’ sayin’.”
“He's not wrong,” Four agreed. “But we don’t need to know, remember… secrets are our own to keep, even if it's relevant to others.”
“But it is impacting the quest,” Warriors pointed out quietly, which was the one caveat in that agreement.
“Is it that important though?” Sky asked. He cast a wary glance at Legend. Legend finished his drink quickly just to get the burn of the hot liquid down his throat, just for the pain to make him focus. “Clearly it's… sensitive.”
“Captain’s right,” he said, his voice just a bit strained from the roughness in his throat. “It impacted the quest… everyone else ended up sharin’ something at some point, only fair.”
Wild muttered, “Not when you’re breaking down in tears but okay."
Legend shot him a glare and Wild raised his hands in surrender. He sighed and decided to try and explain.
“It's… not as complicated as you think, though I'm not sure how it happened, but…” where was he supposed to start. “There are stories in my era of the Fallen Hero, a young man who helped Queen Zelda the Reclaimer lead the rebellion against the Evil King of Thieves.”
He felt Twilight tense, noticed Wind snap his head up, and saw Time stiffen.
“As the stories go, the Evil King of Thieves was a Gerudo male who killed the Hylian King and plunged Hyrule into ruin. The Hero confronted him after the Seven Years of Darkness, but he failed, the Evil King of Thieves killed him. Queen Zelda took her sages—one from forest, one from fire, one from water, one from shadows, and one from sand—and with their power combined, they managed to seal him in the Sacred Realm.”
“But…” Wind croaked. “That sounds like—That sounds almost like the Hero of Time’s story, the sages and the King of Thieves, the Seven Years of Darkness…”
“I thought so too when I read a book in the Rancher’s era about it, an account of time travel from the Hero of Time.” Legend looked over at Time. “In fact, even the dates lined up perfectly.”
Time paled.
Legend leaned back and let his head hit the back of the sofa. “But apparently, dying didn't stop him from leaving a legacy. My grandpa always said we carried a legacy of knights, that we were descended from the original Knights of Hyrule, and in a way, he was right—but he always referred to Raven when he spoke like that."
"Raven? The man from when we found you?"
"The very same. I found out that Raven's grandfather was none other than the Fallen Hero himself.”
Time snapped his head toward Legend, he saw him do as much from the corner of his eye, but he kept his head directed to the ceiling as he spoke.
“I wanted to ask my grandparents about it. They are--They were my only living relatives... at least, on that side of my family, but clearly that didn't really work.” He would not cry again, thank you. “That doesn't explain the Rancher and why we saw someone who looked like him though, does it?”
“Not exactly,” Warriors admitted. “But I'd guess that that…man we saw was the Rancher, only from your timeline.”
Legend didn't respond, only nodded.
“Wait, if those were your grandparents, and that's the Rancher’s alternate self…” Wild trailed off.
Legend made a startled noise that wasn't a squeak, shut up Traveler. Twilight pulled him into a hug. He tried for a moment to get free because, again, he really needed to not lose his composure in front of everyone, but Twilight just pulled him closer and made an almost wounded noise.
Wild burst into laughter, falling off his stool and continuing to cackle loudly despite his sudden descent.
"That was honestly the best answer we could've gotten,” Warriors said, breathing a sigh of relief.
“What were you expecting?” Sky asked.
“With the Vet these days? Literally anything.”
Legend grabbed his empty wooden mug and threw it at Warriors, nailing him in the head.
“Hey!”
Everyone else broke into laughter and Twilight snorted.
“Good throw, Kit.”
“Oh shut up,” he grumbled, but succumbed to his fate.
Not that he particularly disliked it, there were worse things to be experiencing.
The tension had been cut. Warm laughter and teases echoing through the room until Telma came and told Twilight to herd his ragtag group of kids to bed as it was way too late to be dealing with them, Legend let the rancher in question cling to him.
All he could think as they slowly worked their way upstairs, Hyrule and Warriors teasing one another as bad as Legend would've with the Captain, was that he really hoped he wouldn't lose this family too.
Next>>
#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu legend#lu time#lu linkle#lu warriors#lu hyrule#lu wind#lu twilight#lu wild#lu sky#lu four#fanfic#lu fanfiction#prosie writes#a thousand ways au#y'all have got to remind me to update these more often#my goodness
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Day 4: يقبرني Ya'aburnee (Arabic)
A way to declare your hope that your loved one will outlive you, as it would be unbearable to Live without them.
(Continuation from Day 1: Saudade Entry)
That night after sending the paper plane Neji dreamed about her. There was few different scenes that flashed behind his eyes but there was one he remembered vividly. Probably because it was something that really happened.
It was the day of the infamous Konohagakure Middle School Brawl. Tenten was known around town for being a hardass. Well, not really a hard ass but she liked to fight. After being bullied for years for being an outsider. She got fed up and slapped the shit out of one of her bullies. From about 4th grade and on, this made her target. She ended up fighting all the time.
Her parents enrolled her into martial arts classes to help mitigate some of her anger. That’s where she and Neji meet. The winter between junior and senior year of elementary school. They became fast friends eventually attending middle school together.
Fast forward to the third year in middle school. She had calmed down a bit and it helped that Neji and Lee were there to reign her in and keep her out of trouble-most of the time. Which was a tall task because a lot of people just didn't like her.
On this day in particular. It just so happened to be a school festival day. It was packed and raining on and off the entire time. Neji was in the student council office retrieving some supplies. The door bursts open.
“Neji Ni-san, it's Tenten. Lee needs to come right now. There out back by the tennis courts “
Neji dropped what he was doing. He brushed passed hinata and started running down the hall to head outside as fast as his feet would carry him. When finally did make it out back. The crowd was so thick that he knew he was gonna have a hard time getting thru. But moved as swiftly as he could.
That's when he saw them. Lee held on to both her hands trying to keep her attention. Naruto stood right next to body blocking her. Neji ran over to them out of breath.
“Tenten, are you okay? What's going on” he checked to see if she was injured.
“I'm fine. I just need to go talk to someone for a second. Lee won't let me go”
Neji was confused.
“I'm pretty sure she didn't mention it but we've been having some issues with some of Technical Middle School kids. We found them beating up and robbing some freshmen. Turned out they were low level Anbu gang members. They’ve been taunting us all day” said Naruto
“Okay then, let me take you home” she looked at Lee “Lee, can you let Iruka Sensei know that i’m taking Tenten home. If he asks, she's not feeling well.
“Here, take my bike. It’ll be faster” Naruto tossed, his keys into Neji. “It's blue and orange with a frog lock. “Yelled the blonde as he and Lee rushed off to go find Iruka Sensei.
“Come on Tenten” Neji grab her hand and begin pulling her through the crowd. “Were you planning on telling me any of this”
“No, I didn't want you worrying about me”
“I'm always worry about you. Especially when I’m not around. You do reckless things”
Tenten scuffed
“I’m sorry to disappoint you then if that's the case. But what was I supposed to do? Let the those kids get stomped out”
She had a point
“You did the right thing. But what's been happening today?”
“They been trying to lure me into fighting all day. I'm not sure, how many members are here. But their leader Temari is definitely here. Her second in command I think, his name is Kankuro. He rolled up on me earlier. But Lee scared him off.
“So what’s your plan? Did you plan to fight them all by yourself”
“Yeah, if that's how it's gotta be then that's how it's gotta be”
Neji remembers how much that reveal hurt him.
“This is a suicide mission. Are you trying to die?”
Tenten halted, standing her ground. But I didn't answer him. And when she didn't answer he continued.
“I don't want you to die”
Tenten flinched, and fear flashed through her eyes and Neji let go. She took a deep breath and stood really tall.
“Of course not. I just don't want to be scared anymore”
He hadn't expecting those words out of her mouth. Tenten always seemed so fearless. She was the swing and ask questions later type. That's why Neji had vowed to always protect her. He really didn't know who he was without her.
“How does putting your life in danger fix that? I am seriously trying to understand”
She pondered his words while looking around.
“I'm not sure it does. If I give them what they want. They'll go away. I can take solace in knowing that I'm not a coward”
Tenten was one of the bravest and kindness people he knew. She was a lot of things but a coward, never.
“I understand but I'm still taking you home. We’ll come up with a better solution. "Neji reaches out, to grab her hand again so they continue moving.
But a loud scream echoed behind them. They both swiftly turned around. Somebody had punched Naruto in the back of his head. Two other people started running at him.
Neji went to grab her but missed. Tenten ran across the school yard and kicked one of the attackers right in their back.
Neji found himself running right behind her and grabbing the second attacker by his shirt and judo flipping him.
Tenten helped Naruto up and a group of guys and girls with bats, chains and started running at them. All hell broke was about the brakes loose. The rain started picking up, making visibility almost impossible.
Neji was sure that were going to die that day. Neji made peace with it because at the very least they were together. He wants it any other way. Through some what Neji couldn't only assume was divine intervention, they all survived.
Lee’s broke one of his legs. Naruto broke his hand and a few broken ribs. Tenten tore her. A Achilles tendon and few broken ribs. Loving her had brought really hard lessons and Neji the scars to prove it. But he wouldn't have had it any other way.
Ya'aburnee
#anime#manga#naruto#naruto shippuden#naruto uzumaki#tenten#neji hyuga#nejiten week 2024#nejiten#fanfiction#fanfic#naruto shitposting#team gai#team guy#masashi kishimoto#naruto series#soulcial dreamin ent
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Ryan Wesley Routh, the suspected gunman involved in an apparent assassination attempt on former president Donald Trump at the Trump International Golf Club in Florida on Sunday, was charged with possession of a weapon of mass destruction more than 20 years ago.
“I figured he was either dead or in prison by now,” Tracy Fulk, the charging officer in the case, tells WIRED. “I had no clue that he had moved on and was continuing his escapades.”
According to court records from the Guilford District Court in North Carolina obtained by WIRED, Routh was arrested by the Greensboro Police Department on December 16, 2002.
Local reporting from Greensboro News and Record in 2002 states that Routh was pulled over by police during a traffic stop. Routh then drove to the business United Roofing, where he proceeded to barricade himself for three hours, the police said at the time.
Fulk says he was well known in the area, and that police would get alerts about him allegedly related to, as she remembers, weapons and explosives.
“One night I recognized him in his vehicle,” she says. “I knew he didn’t have a driver’s license, so I stopped him right in front of his roofing shop, which was what used to be on Lee Street in Greensboro. He stopped, and as I approached his truck he pulled a sack away from the center of the seat, and I saw a gun. So of course I drew my gun and started saying, ‘Hey! Show me your hands, show me your hands.’ And he just basically pulled into his driveway and ran into his house. So we ended up having a [Special Response Team] callout and a big standoff for a couple of hours before they went in and we arrested him.”
Routh was charged with possession of a fully automatic machine gun, referred to in court filings as a weapon of mass destruction. He was also charged with carrying a concealed weapon, as well as driving without a valid license and resisting, delaying, and obstructing law enforcement, according to Greensboro News and Record.
While the disposition of the case isn’t entirely clear, Routh did plead guilty to carrying a concealed gun.
Trump was not harmed on Sunday while playing golf. Law enforcement apprehended Routh after a Secret Service agent spotted a rifle sticking out of a perimeter fence on the course and engaged with the threat, firing at least four rounds in that direction. It’s unclear whether the gunman fired a shot. Law enforcement later found an AK-47 style rifle with a scope and a GoPro in the bushes.
The gunman was reportedly seen fleeing the scene and getting into a black Nissan; a witness took photos of the car and license plate, said Palm Beach County sheriff Ric Bradshaw at a Sunday press conference. “We had that information,” said Bradshaw. “Our real-time crime center put it out to the license plate readers, and we were able to get a hit on that vehicle on I-95.” Routh was arrested soon after.
The FBI has said they are investigating “what appears to be an attempted assassination” of Trump. This is the second assassination attempt on the former president; the first occurred on July 13 in Butler, Pennsylvania.
“My resolve is only stronger after another attempt on my life,” Trump wrote in a fundraising email after the apparent assassination attempt. “I will never slow down. I will never give up. I WILL NEVER SURRENDER!”
Fulk says Routh was well known for getting into armed confrontations with police. “I wasn’t the only one who had a standoff with him,” she says. “We always knew he had weapons.” Guilford County court records show Routh was charged dozens of times, often for driving-related offenses, going back to the early 1980s. In regards to why he wasn’t in jail, Fulk says, “All we can do is arrest them, and then obviously it goes into the court system and they decide all of that. It’s frustrating at times.”
The Greensboro Police Department did not immediately respond to a request for comment, nor did a lawyer who represented Routh in his 2003 divorce.
In 2023, Routh told The New York Times that he traveled to Ukraine after the Russian invasion to aid Ukraine and support the war effort. He said he planned to recruit Afghan soldiers who fled the Taliban to fight for Ukraine. There is no evidence that Routh traveled to Ukraine or was successful at recruitment. Social media accounts that appear to be controlled by Routh have been taken down, but were reportedly full of erratic posts espousing Covid conspiracies, threats against Russia, and in support of politicians of a variety of ideologies.
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Snow White Peaks
Cassian x Illyrian!Reader
Summary: Cassian meets a strange female when investigating a random note from her summoning her 'Brother' Rhysand. He falls for her and the two have a child together only he doesn't know it. When he finds out he swears to be there from now on.
Warnings: 18+, implied semi-graphic smut but not full scenes, war, sub!Cassian, bullying, physical violence.
Word Count: 10,113
Notes: There will most definitely be a part two of Cassian bonding with his son and getting his wish of wanting to be there for firsts of a child. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Illyria: The northernmost region of the Night Court. A few barren rocky islets, steppes, mountain ranges, and most importantly the camps.
There were 6 major camps nestled within the mountain peaks: Windhaven and Ironcrest being the most well known; the other four: Blackrock ran by Lord Caston, Snowhollow ran by Lord Edoril, Ebonhold ran by Lord Varyn, and Highgarde ran by Lord Soldril, were all lesser known but still trained members of the Night Courts armies.
However, there was one more major camp, the Angelsrest. Rhysand’s father had commissioned the camp and swore it into secrecy and under protection. It was a camp for gifted Illyrians; he had tried to send Azriel there once but Devlon had his talons into him and refused to send him off. In reality it was a privately funded and specialized unit of powerful illyrians that were trained as a back pocket weapon for the High Lord.
Angelsrest was founded behind the other camplords' backs, Rhysands father had been keeping an eye on the war camps and villages since he had found his mate with her wings about to be clipped. He had found one village hidden back away from the other camps, hundreds if not thousands of miles from any other village or camp. The entire mindset and tradition of these illyrians, while similar to the others at their core, held a much higher regard for gods and their spirituality.
He explored the village and introduced himself to the illyrians there who greeted him with open arms; they showed him around, fed him, let him examine their way of life, They answered any questions he had without hesitation. One thing, however, caught his attention; at the top of the camp where the Lords house normally stood was an elegantly painted and decorated temple like home.
“What's in there?” The High lord had asked a female working on tanning a hide.
“Oh! That's the ladies house, the white mother.” She had chirped back.
“The white mother?” He furrowed his brows.
“She talks to the mother and the night father, the old gods before the Cauldron. They rewarded us for our devotion by gifting us and her with a child from the skies itself. The starchild we call her.” The female explained.
“Why do you call her the starchild?” The High Lord was utterly confused, he had never heard anything like this before.
“There was old legends and lore eons ago when Illyrians first made their homes here that the night father guided every lord at the time to where their village or camp now stands, it's said our first lord was led here, where a star had fallen from the sky and landed amongst the snow. He nursed the star to health and kept trying to return her home to the night father, the stars are his children you see?” She hummed brightly. “As a gift for returning his child, he granted him powers of the stars; however, it turned his wings white in the process. The night father declared that as payment every child of his bloodline would have the gift as well.”
“Ahh, Starchild makes sense now.” the high lord nodded.
“She's the last starchild. Her mother married into the bloodline but her father passed away recently after a hunting patrol went awry.” The female looked down, grief evident in her face.
“Oh, I apologize for the loss.” The lord mumbled.
“I can introduce you to the starchild if you wish? Her mother is out hunting right now so the child is with the elders and other babes.” The female offered, standing from the hide rack.
“Please, I’m intrigued by the story if I am being honest with you.” The lord thanked her.
The two walked silently through the sprawling houses and buildings, till they came to a large hut. Older males and women sat on stools and padded chairs, long since having served their community. The laughter and echoes of children rang out as they ran around the room, at the center a white winged female leading them to their next adventure. Her wings white with a faint purple to the membranes, sparkled like freshly fallen snow; she held them high and proudly, they were much larger than any of the other childrens and she had to adjust them regularly so the tips wouldn’t drag against the wood flooring.
“Stardust, come here please.” The female beside him chirped.
The child apologized and dismissed herself from the group, clearly only around 10 years of age. She approached the two sweetly introducing herself to the lord in front of her, he introduced himself back and shook her tiny hand.
It was the first time he had met her, and it surely wasn’t the last time; he would make regular check-ins with the small community and on the small female, who grew close to him like she was his own daughter. When Rhys was born he brought the babe out for her to meet, she held him excitedly while the lord told her about Velaris and his court and the other war camps and villages he had explored. As she grew so did her wings and personality, she had to hold her wings higher and higher on her shoulders as the tips of the talons started touching the ground; she used it to her advantage though as an extremely fast and strong flier, the day she had beaten all the records in her village she eagerly showed the lord.
Her powers continued to manifest and expand and by 16 she was one of the top in her village, the lord invited her to Velaris and his home for her birthday where she had gotten to see a 5 year old Rhys. The lord offered to have her taught war tactics, to have someone teach her how to fight; she took the offer eagerly and began reporting to a general weekly till she was 20 and had learned everything the male could teach her.
By her 21st year the lord had called her into the mountains above her village and deep into a wooded plateau, she remembered males from her village would be up here for hours working on something; she asked him if their work had something to do with what he had to show her, when he agreed with thoughts she grew excited to see the years worth of work the villagers had put in. The two marched through the powdered snow and worn path till they reached a clearing, a large wooden fence with the sign reading Angelsrest greeted them; she looked eagerly over to the lord, he motioned for her to explore the newly built war-camp.
“Why did you decide to build a camp out here father?” She inquired.
“As a gift. For you.” He replied. “You will be the lady of the camp, the first Illyrian female to run a war-camp.”
She looked back at him, her wings flared slightly then relaxed. “Why me?”
“You have surpassed my expectations, it would be a shame if your talents were to go unharnessed.” He smiled. “I have seen you working with the children in your village, I wanted to give you the opportunity to really train.”
She pulled him into a hug and thanked him, promising her best work for him. From then on the war camp began to take form, a mix of illyrians from her village and those the lord would pull from other camps and villages; those with powers much like his ‘shooting star’ as he called her. The camp was ideal from the get go, wing clipping had been banned, all illyrians within her camp were talented and trained equally.
Then the first tragedy of her life struck, her mother succumbed to wounds like her father had; the lord took her to Velaris and officially adopted her. By the time Rhys was old enough to join Windhaven Angelsrest was in full swing, an assortment of various powerful illyrians making their home there.
Then came the letter, written in a cursive panicked sprawl from the lord she now called father; detailing his plans to avenge the loss of his wife and biological daughter, he apologized for any wrongs he may have cause her and told her he had a bad feeling as he readied himself to go after their killers. He detailed how he had sworn Rhys to keep the camp running and protected under her rule as lord, the lord had his son swear to keep his eye out for talented illyrians and bring them to her for training. Rhys had only met her a handful of times as he grew up and being forced to swear her protection had startled him as he realized how much his father truly cared for his adoptive sister in the mountains.
The day Rhys appeared at Angelsrest and saw how much progress the camp had made with their training, the white winged female had caught him off guard. Rhys had only become high lord a week prior and was touching bases with every camp but the atmosphere was different; every illyrian respected her and even though she stood taller than Rhys did at that point with almost double his wingspan he understood their fathers fascination with the power she possessed, she carried nearly double the siphons he and his brothers did. She commanded respect without actually commanding it, her actions made those around her want to follow her. She toured him around the camp's facilities, showed off their training, and her top warriors.
Eventually a female with tiny wings joined the two as they toured, folders and paperwork in her hands that she passed off to her white winged superior to approve. The small winged female was introduced as her deputy and second in command of the camp, while her wings had stopped growing as a child she had become incredibly intelligent and had adapted to be able to winnow or blink incredible distances.
After Rhys had decided the tour sufficient, he apologized for her loss and swallowed a breath sharply; her wings flared slightly as she tried to keep her composure, her brother's attitude towards their father and his legacy having angered her.
“Like I said, your camp will continue to operate as is and we would like you to remain here unless called to Velaris or another camp for a meeting. If I ever need an update or anything I will send one of my inner circle to check in with you.” The younger male nodded and disappeared from the front of the camp.
The white winged female and her deputy turned back to the lively camp behind them, those in training pausing to greet the two; they climbed the steps of the main building while discussing the matters at hand and how to further continue their training. The meeting with her brother was the start of changing tides.
She wouldn’t see the male she called brother or his circle for nearly 4-5 hundred years, gifted and powerful Illyrians would appear at the front of the camp explaining they were dropped off by the new highlord; she would bring them in show them the ropes and introduce them to the others training at the camp. Then came the silence, 30 years of no new illyrians at their door; so she sent letters to Velaris looking for her brother and summoning him for a meeting, one of his generals came instead.
+
“Ferelith, any update on a letter back from Velaris?” I asked my deputy while looking over several pieces of paperwork from businesses within my camp and village.
“No mam.” She responded looking up from behind her own paperwork, her small wings fluttering quickly behind her.
“Fere, I told you no formalities.” I hummed back to her.
“And you will have to tell me every day my lady.” Ferelith responded back with a chirp.
I snorted and there was a knock on the study door, a younger male I remembered by the name Leander who harnessed some power that was capable of animal communication, stepped into the study looking extremely pale and panicked. He was from a village near camp Windhaven, had been brought to my camp when he was 15 after he had nearly been hanged for stealing a sheep that was in immense pain from improper feed and bloating.
“Mam.” he saluted.
“Leander? What’s the matter child?” I looked up from my desk, watching as the male panted, his wings taught against his back.
“The General! He’s outside, mam. The Lord of Bloodshed.” Leander shifted anxiously from foot to foot.
“Thank you Leander, you are dismissed. Ferelith come, we have a guest to greet.” I stood, pushing the stool under the desk, flaring my wings every so slightly as I adjusted them up my back.
I slipped from my study and pushed the grand doors open, eyeing down the male standing in the center courtyard; his wings were flared out in an intimidation tactic and a grand Red siphon set in the center of his chest.
I took a breath in and squared my shoulders staring down at the male in the center of my camp. “Lord of Bloodshed, what brings you to my camp?”
His eyes widened as he stared back up at me, “So I see the rumors are true my lady. I’ve received your letter meant for the High Lord, he is otherwise preoccupied at the moment.”
I scoffed and continued down the steps till I stood eye to eye with him. “My own brother is too preoccupied to see to his own affairs? Let alone a deal he was sworn into?”
The male tensed, his wings flaring like I had insulted him personally. “If you wish to further discuss the matters at hand, let me pull you aside and we can speak on it in private.”
He still had to look up at me by about a head and a half,my eyes raked up and down the male as a means to size him up; watching as he subconsciously made small movements that told me he found me intimidating: small eye movements between me and the snow covered ground, miniscule movements of his wings to make himself smaller in my gaze, and he turned his head ever so slightly like he would turn and run if I came at him aggressively. It made me want to smirk, instead I decided to test my observation further.
I glared at him a bit harsher than I had before and flared my wings, watching as his throat bobbed. “Fine, this way then.”
I turned to the side, giving him space to climb the stairs beside me. His wings were tight and tense against his back as he climbed them, and as soon as he had passed me I turned to walk beside him up the bath to my house.
After he had stepped through the grand door frame I looked over my shoulder to Ferelith. “Please see to the training regimens and check in with the shops while I attend this meeting.”
She simply nodded and turned; trodding down the wooden steps and towards the training ring. I shut the door behind us, the faelights flickering from the chilled wind blowing in. He stood in the center of the entryway, uneased he shifted on his feet; I motioned to the study I had been sitting in earlier and he shuffled in.
Rounding my desk I pulled the stool back out and adjusted myself on it. I motioned for the padded chair in front of me that was specially made for illyrian wings;He sat and adjusted his wings, I greeted him with a smile and leaned onto my elbows.
“So, Lord of Bloodshed, tell me why my brother is too preoccupied to make good on our deal.” My tone was venomous as I smiled at him.
He straightened in his seat. “There's been some commotion in the Courts of Prythian, Rhys has done his best to keep Illyria out of it so you wouldn't know and wouldn’t have heard anything. He went to a meeting held by some kind of emissary slash general of the King of Hybern. Lots of the high lords and their people did, none of them have been back yet but we know they are alive from what Tamlin, the High Lord of Spring, has told us. She put a curse on him and his court held the rest of the lords hostage. We are waiting to find out more.” Cassian sighed. “We haven't heard from Rhys just as long as you, we didn’t even know about your deal and what it's about or this camp. No one even knew Rhys had another sister till your letter came.”
I sighed and rubbed my temples. “That would explain the radio silence. Ask away.”
“First, why are your wings white?” Cassian questioned.
“My ancestors made a deal with the Night father, surely you've heard the mythology of him?” I asked.
Cassian nodded. “Vaguely yeah, didn't he show the ancient illyrians where to make their homes?”
“Precisely, the village I came from that I’m sure you saw when flying in, has a special connection with the Night Father. I implore you to find our archivist in the village below if you wish to know the lore to the full extent.” I half explained and he nodded intently.
“So, if you're Rhys’s sister and older than him, why didn’t you become lord or lady if you were the heir?” Cassian questioned.
“Adopted sister, my father died before I was born and my mother died shortly after the founding of this camp. Our father took interest in me when I was incredibly young, my powers made an impression on him and it was before Rhys’s birth. He had originally just wanted to see me trained correctly but became invested and we grew a bond like that of a father and his child. I'm not his true heir, even though he expressed his desire for that before he passed.” I motioned to the painting that had been gifted to me with the camp, a picture of father and I that he had painted.
Cassian nodded. “Rhys hasn't told us a thing about this camp or an outstanding deal with it, I've only heard rumors from the other camps I’ve visited.”
I sighed. “The deal is that he and any high lord in the future, as long as this camp is running, will bring gifted and powerful Illyrians here to be trained. The camp has been kept out of major eyes and ears due to the fact it's a back pocket weapon for the high lords.”
Cassian tilted his head in questioning “Then why are you not on our regular camp regulation trips?”
“Camp regulations? What does my dear brother have you check?” I asked.
“Like females being trained, wing clipping is banned, stuff like that.” Cassian shrugged.
“Then that is part of why Rhys hasn’t had any of you do a check here, those have been in place here since before Rhys was born my village never did that and when the camp was built that rule carried over. It's been hard to break some of the males ,who came from camps and villages where that was practice, out of that mindset; and we have females here who were already clipped before they joined us but everyone gets equal training and opportunities as long as they want too. Some opt out and wish to work the shops instead, that is not frowned on either as it supports the camp further.” I said entirely disinterested, turning back to the paperwork on my desk.
“I mean that's true, I was able to tell from mere observation. But! Normally we still check in every so often and observe training or join in on a session of training.” Cassian rebutted
“Your high lord cares not for the camps or real change would have taken place by now. You only check them when you receive a complaint or a rumor reaches your ears.” I retorted without looking up from my desk.
Cassian growled and stormed towards the desk, slamming his hands on the wood. “Quit talking down on Rhys, you have no right! I’m sorry that he got the bigger stick and he ended up being dear ol daddy’s favorite; your not any better than he is, fuck I’d say from the attitude you have given me since the start you are worse than he is.”
My eyes flicked up to him, and I raised a brow at him. “You have 3 seconds to return to your seat.”
He scoffed and as he went to return to his rant. I flared my wings as a warning and stood up quick enough my stool clattered to the floor behind me. I used my speed to gain advantage against him while he wasn't paying any attention, pinning his head against my desk by the side of his neck. His cheek was red squished against the wooden desk and his own wings flared as he struggled against my hold.
“Collect yourself General, before you regret it.” I hissed back at him.
His eyes widened as he looked towards me stunned. I narrowed my eyes on the male.
“You may stay a few days if you wish to conduct your little observation further. But I warn you General if you cross any line here I will correct you. Remember whose camp you are in.” I growled down at him.
He growled back and tried to stand up and fight against my hold, I strengthened my hold and pressed his cheek harder against the desk; splinters threatened his skin and my desk creaked as it threatened to give way, my grip on the male finally loosened when he whimpered. I scoffed and released him walking out of my office and back out into the snowy campgrounds.
+
Cassian’s visit was relatively uneventful, everything checked out regulations wise but he needed to know more about the strange white winged female whose life he had barged into at her request for the male he called brother. He didn’t necessarily like her and her tendency to drag Rhysand but something about her he found intimidating and interesting, like there was something more just around the corner she was hiding. He found any excuse to stay, even if it meant butting heads with her; he often lost the fights if he pushed her boundaries but he was hoping to push her over an edge, hoping it would cause her to mess up and reveal something. He had requested a walk-through of every building in the camp, finding something as simple as a loose board as a cause for concern. He had written to Azriel after a week telling him it would be awhile before he returned; saying the camp needed more observation and he wanted to make sure training was up to date, any excuse in the book really.
It had been a month of Cassian and the Lady of the camp butting heads, when Cassian realized why he was so intrigued at pissing her off.
The first time was when he started his every building must be checked and looked over, he had spent the day being in her way; he followed her room to room looking at every minor detail. He knew he was close when her eyes kept flicking up to him and then shed rub her temples, he finally got her to yell at him by flapping or ‘adjusting’ his wings knocking papers from her desk when she took a drink of hot tea. She had stood abruptly and pinned him to the wall, yelling at him her office was off limits until she had completed her tasks for the day; she had dragged him out of her office and tossed him to the floor just outside it, slamming the doors shut. He had lain on the floor for about 10 minutes with a victorious smile on his face, before he had finally got up to finish his walk through.
The next day he had followed her to a meeting with her own generals, he had learned their names were Saros and Larissa, under the excuse he would like to be able to ask them questions about their regiment. She had agreed with a sigh, and hiked out to the ring with him at her heels. The meeting had started fine but when everything had checked out he had to find some way to annoy her, so questions he would ask. Everytime she would start to ask about something he would interrupt with his own question. ‘How do you specifically train for their powers?’, ‘Do you spend the same amount of time with every individual during personal training hours or is it based on that person's needs?’. All questions that would make sense for him to be asking, but simply inconveniencing her. He watched as her wings tensed and flared but she couldn’t do anything as it was all standard stuff he needed to know. He walked away from the meeting with a smirk and a swagger in his hips.
He would often follow her for about half an hour a day at the start, if she was walking around camp he was at her heel and if she stopped to talk to a member of the camp he was behind her mimicking her every movement. If she was in her office he was making small humming noises while ‘reading’ books from her shelf, ignoring her when she snipped at him to stop the annoying noises, he would kick his feet up on the coffee table much to her annoyance, ask personal questions, and fidget with kick knacks around her office until she forced him out of the office and away from her.
Some of his proudest moments were when he was able to publicly embarrass or aggravate her. The first time he had gotten the rush from his new favorite pastime she had been in a meeting with the shopkeepers in a new conference room he had yet to see, he had been walking around admiring the art and artifacts compiled here. It was a public conference hall anyone in camp could reserve and use, everyone had pitched in to decorate it and it was actually quite a sight Cassian had to admit. They were deep in negotiations when Cassian had stopped paying attention and simply admired the surroundings; he had run into a pillar holding an ornate sculpture of ‘Her Highness’. He had spun on his heels when he realized the statue was falling, he had reached out to stop the fall but was a second late as it clattered to the floor and shattered. Everyone had looked over to Cassian as the shatter had cut off the female he enjoyed annoying ever so much, all eyes were on him and her as her wings flared; she let out a loud sigh, wings pulled closer to her back and she pinched the bridge of her nose.
It had been unintentional but he was delighted when she sighed loudly “Meeting dismissed, we will reconvene later this week”
The second time he had publicly embarrassed her was a night in the mess hall. He had eaten in there with the other warriors everyday since he had arrived and he was a welcomed presence in the hall with his humor and antics. It had given him nostalgia to his days in Windhaven, to which he would tell stories of what he and his brothers had gotten up to in their own camp. She had walked into the mess hall, wings glittering like fresh powdered snow in the faelights, her small deputy at her side. They had both conversed their entire way through the line, paying him and the others barely any mind beside small hellos as they carried on back and forth.
When the two sat down she had taken a bite and hummed, nearly moaning, as she took a bite of the beef. “I'm telling you Ferelith Beef and noodle night never fails to impress. I never miss it, by the father, this is my favorite meal we have, probably the best as well.”
The small female beside her nodded along, chirping back and Cassian took a bite of his own plate, chewing on the egg noodles he smirked at his opening. He cleared his throat, everyone turning to look at him wide eyed.
With a scoff he stood and made his way over to her. “The best? Don’t be ridiculous. If this is the best you have, I feel sorry for your warriors.” He shrugged and took his fork stabbing into her meat. “The meat is tough and you have to chew for ages to get through it. The noodles? Wayyyyy too doughy. Don’t even get me started on the broth, this is probably some of the worst gruel I’ve had.” He popped the piece into his mouth, and the room went super quiet, tension thick enough even Truth Teller wouldn’t have been able to cut it.
To be honest, he was lying through his teeth, but being able to embarrass her like this was well worth it. This was probably one of the best meals he had ever had while in a camp, it was definitely better than what Windhaven called gruel. He looked around a smirk on his face, to see everyone still and tense.
“If you don’t like it, General, you are free to leave at any time.” He didn;t like this he decided, her tone was cold and venomous. A silent anger on her features as she stood, plate in hand and walked from the mess hall.
Ferelith was still before she swiped up her own tray and scrambled after the head of camp. When the doors shut behind the small female he turned to the group of males he had been sitting with.
His brows furrowed in worry, “Why are you all so silent? What did I do?”
One of the males he had recognized as one of the generals from the training ring grimaced as he spoke. “The recipe for the beef and noodle gruel is her mothers, they were incredibly close.”
Cassian winced. “I fucked up didn’t I?”
The males all nodded rapidly till one of them, the small male he had seen when he first landed into camp, an Oleander or something similar if he recalled correctly, spoke up. “Mr. Cassian sir, Lord of Bloodshed sir. If I may ask, what do you have against her? I just have noticed you seem to take joy in making her upset. She's a good leader sir, she doesn’t deserve whatever this is.”
There was a murmur of agreement and Cassian sighed. “To be honest, it started as a game because she looked down on Rhys and I simply wanted under her skin, now though it's just kinda grown into a habit.” A partial lie but he wasn’t going to admit the truth, he could barely admit the truth to himself.
The small male spoke up again. “I just think, Casian sir, that you should maybe apologize to her, she does her best keeping up with everything here.”
“Right, Right. I’ll do it tomorrow and give her some time to cool off. I'm heading to my room. I'll see everyone in the morning for breakfast.” Cassian waved them off, dropping his own plate and tray off with the dishwasher.
She had been nice enough to put him up in the guest room of her own house, he pulled the grand door open just enough to slip inside and moved up the stairs. He slipped into the dark room, not bothering to crawl under the covers, he kicked off his boots and slipped into warm night clothes, laying on top of the bed and staring at the ceiling contemplating everything. He finally had to admit it to himself and accept the fact the entire reason for annoying her was because he enjoyed the change of pace, enjoyed her being able to overpower him and put him in place. The first time she had shoved him against the desk had him realizing it made his pant tighten in the crotch, only seconded by the time she threw him out of her study and onto the floor resulting in the same reaction.
He must have fallen asleep, because hew awoke to a small clatter and a mumbled “Fuck.” from the downstairs kitchen.
He dragged himself out of bed and down the stairs finding her nursing a cut finger and a broken glass.
He leaned on the doorframe with his arms crossed. “You okay?” He yawned.
She turned to glare at him. “What do you want? Come to insult me some more?”
“Honestly? No, I was investigating the loud noise that woke me up. Look I’m sorry okay, I realize I pushed too far.” He shrugged and took a few steps into the kitchen, leaning against the island counters opposite her.
+
I watched Cassian round the islands and lean against the counters, I’ve had enough of his shit this past month.
“Other than that, what the FUCK do you want with me Cassian? You push and push and are only ever satisfied after I lash out at you or you embarrass me. Why?” I hissed at him.
Cassian shifted from foot to foot and sighed before straightening his stance and swiping the hair from his face. He moved to lean over the sink with me, taking my hand in his and rinsing the now dried blood from my finger.
He sighed. “If I’m being 100% honest, this month has made me realize something about myself. It took me awhile to accept it but after I realized I pushed too far tonight I had to face it and figured I’d confront you about it in the morning or just leave tomorrow but seems the mother or the father, I know he's a more important figure to you, have deemed me to confront you about it tonight. Maybe confront is the wrong word…” Cassian rambled on.
“What are you talking about Cassian? Just answer my question already.” I tried to hiss at him but was ultimately stunned by his gentleness.
“Maybe confess is a better word here. Yeah. I wanted to confess to you about it tonight.” He nodded and I furrowed my brows at him.
“What are you on about? What is it you wish to confess, Oh Great General?” I rolled my eyes.
Cassian pulled the hand he was holding to his chest, my palm laying flat against the muscular skin. “I’ve come to realize I like it when you put me in place, I like that you can overpower me with a flick of your wrist. It's haunted me since the day you pinned me to the desk. I had to test my theory and was only proven right when you tossed me on the floor outside of your study, when I had the same reaction I didnt wanna accept it but the thrill of getting you to lash out at me like that; often times physically overpowering me, was incredibly addicting.”
I could feel his heart pounding. “Cassian.” I warned, but his puppy dog eyes as I looked down at him I gave in, a heat beginning to grow in my cheeks and I sighed. “And what was this reaction you speak about?”
Those same puppy dog eyes greeted me with a nervous smile, he pulled at my wrist guiding my hand to the crotch of the sweatpants he wore. I turned my head to look down on him with a half-assed glare, he shifted slightly and I could feel him strain against my hand.
“Ah I see.” I hummed. “And what would you like me to do about it?”
The worry in his eyes turned a bit hopeful. “I’m normally the one incharge in these situations so this is kinda new to me but I’m not afraid to let a pretty and strong girl top me, if I get a request… make me forget my own name?”
He turned his head slightly to the side exposing his neck, a habit of submission and obedience in illyrians. I looked down at him through my lashes with a smirk, id torture him back for what he out me through .
“And why would I do that Cass?” I stepped closer to him, my free hand coming to his chin to make him look up at me.
His eyes widened again and he swallowed an anxious breath. “I can relieve some of your stress. I’ll let you do whatever you want to, however you want me. I can take what you give me and if I get a bit too cocky or bratty just put me back in my place.”
I tilted my head with a chuckledirecred at him, he shifted again and I smirked. “And how do I know you could do whatever I want?”
He licked his lips, his voice heavy with want. “You've seen me train, you know I have enough stamina for it. I’ve been at death's doorstep plenty of times if you are worried about being too rough: Don’t. Look, I can't believe I’m saying this, I can be your good boy if that’s what you’d like. Mam, respectfully, if you'd let me I promise I can blow your back out.”
I smiled down at him and I felt him throb when venom coated every word that fell from my mouth. “Then get upstairs. I want you on your knees by the end of my bed, you have a whole month of torture to make up for. I’ll be up there shortly, be shirtless when I get up there; pants optional since I know you don’t have anything under them.”
I dropped his chin from my hand and squeezed him with my other, he groaned loudly, choking out his words as he tried to maintain his composure. “Yes mam.”
He slipped out of the kitchen and I slipped into my office, scribbling out a small note for Ferelith to reschedule any and all appointments I had as I would be otherwise preoccupied and resting. Sitting the note on her desk pinned it by the corner with her paperweight and stepped out of the study, making sure the door clicking would be audible on the third floor where my room was. The third floor consisted of only my room, and was purposefully made so I could completely stretch my wings out. I slinked up the stairs, not a board creaking under foot. I wanted him on edge like I had been all month since his antics started, he would have heard the door shut and he would know I was coming up the stairs; but he wouldn’t know when and with how my bed was positioned he would have his back to the door.
The halls were dark, and I pushed the door to my room open slowly so it wouldn’t creak. Cassian was sitting facing the bed, his wings flared out and completely stripped. He must have felt me behind him as he straightened up how he was sitting and I heard his breathing stutter. I slipped into the space between his wings and ran my hands from the knuckle in his wings to the base, where the membranous skin met with his tanner skin. His back arched and he moaned loudly, I leaned down behind him and wrapped my arms around his neck.
I ran my hand under his chin and across his throat, I felt his throat bob as I leaned down and whispered in his ear. “Boo.”
My grasp tightened on his throat and from my vantage point over his shoulder I watched his member twitch, satisfied with his reaction I nipped at his ear and pulled back.
He moved to follow me but I gave him a warning look, he begged with his eyes and they would have been enough for me to give in had I not had a plan. “Mam.”
“Now, now, Cassian, you have a lot to make up for. Before I give you the attention you so desperately want you have to apologize for your behavior.” I chastised him.
He whimpered, “I’m sorry for my behavior my Lady. I’ll make up for it I promise.”
I chuckled. “How cute yet how pathetic it is that you think that's all the apology you need to make up for what you’ve done.”
I rounded his frame and sat on the foot of my bed, wings stretched out either side of me. He moved to crawl towards me but I planted my toes into his chest and he stopped to look up at me desperately.
I raked my eyes over him, finally allowing him to crawl towards me with a simple order. “Come here and strip me, I don't wish to do the work myself.”
He nodded. “Yes mam.”
After he stripped me, he spent hours between my legs at my order; hours that were spent between his mouth as a punishment for his slander and when I was satisfied he had made up for that I finally let him use his cock that he was so proud of, he had let it do his thinking for him and would learn better than that. He had spent several hours nestled between my legs pounding into me and seeking my praise, till I grew bored and pressed his back into the comforter. We had finished our night with him below me, wings spread out either side of him and his fingers dug into the flesh of my thighs. His hips followed mine the closer he got to his final release, whimpers, moans, and pleads left his mouth in rapid succession.
I had finally acknowledged his approaching climax with a smile on my face. “That's it baby” I crooned at him, “Now be a good boy for me and cum for me.”
He had roared in response, his hips slamming up into mine, his hands slipping from my thighs and up to the base of my wings; his nails dug into the line where the membrane turned into tougher skin, it had been just enough to push me over the edge for the final time tonight. My head was thrown back and my hips stuttered, my wings flared open to their full extent as I screamed out his name; coming down from the high I panted out goodboy like a mantra to him but he seemed otherwise mesmerized as he stared into my wings, the soft faelights glittered against them and he ran his fingers softly over the pronounced bone.I had pulled myself off of him and collapsed beside him, he curled up into my side with his head resting between my collarbone and breast. We had fallen asleep together wrapped up in the comforter in the early hours of the morning.
It was well past noon when we were woken up by Ferelith knocking at the door. I sat up and moved to climb out of the bed, Cassian deep in slumber grumbled and tried to pull me back into the bed beside him. I pushed his bangs out of his face with a smile and wrapped my robe around my frame, Ferelith was smirking when I opened my door.
“I’ve got a letter for Cassian here.” She teased in a knowing tone.
“And you knew he was up here how?”I quizzed.
“You said you were preoccupied and obviously that letter was from after I had left last night. It only made sense to me.” She chirped back smugly.
I took the letter from her hand.
“Thank you Fere, you are dismissed.” I grumbled back.
She turned and walked away with a hop in her step and I shut the door softly, turning to find Cassian groggy and laying on his stomach propped up on his elbows.
“What's going on, love?” He mumbled and yawned.
“You’ve got a letter, from a…” I looked over the letter and turned it in my hands reading it off to him. “From an Azriel.”
Cassian perked up and pulled himself from bed. “Let me see.”
I passed him the piece of parchment and raked my eyes over his body, noting he could do with putting a bit of weight on, a dad bod would do him some justice.
“Fuck.” Cassian cursed as he read the letter over.
“What's wrong?” I asked, raising one brow.
“Azriel needs me to report back in, or else he's sending a spy team out.” Cassian mumbled.
“So? Go back to Velaris, that's your home you can always swing by the camp when you have free time. I’m not gonna bar you from the camp, many of my warriors and villagers like your presence.” I shrugged, pulling on my day clothes.
“I figured I would have a day or two more before I would have to go back.” Cassian sighed.
“So go report back to the shadowsinger, that's what he is right? My father tried to bring him here once but Devlon refused to release him. Report to him, give it a couple days, and when you get a chance swing up here.” I snapped the buttons on my side closed. “I can clear my schedule for the day with my good boy.” I tilted his chin up and planted a quick kiss on his lips, he pouted when I pulled away.
“You sure? I wouldn't want to get in the way of camp duties.” He looked up at me with those golden hazel puppy dog eyes.
“I’m sure Cass. You are always welcome here, and you are always welcome in my bed.” I tilted his chin up to me with a smile.
He smirked and wiggled his eyebrows back at me. I snorted and pushed him away. I moved to sit on a padded sofa and began lacing my boots back up. He stepped into the space behind me and placed kisses along the edge of my wings till he reached the leathers on my back. I shooed him away and he pouted dramatically as he began dressing into his own leathers.
We slid down both flights of stairs. Ferelith had the door propped the study over, wiggling her own brows at me, I kissed Cassian farewell and slipped into my study while he slipped out the door. Ferelith looked awfully smug as she smiled up at me.
“What are you smug about?” I grilled her.
“Oh just that I definitely called Cassian having a thing for you, and now Leander, Saros, AND Larissa all owe me their cookies for a week.” She replied smuggly.
“You four placed bets on if Cassian liked me? Based on his actions purposely pissing me off?” I gave her a look of disbelief.
“Well there's more logic to it than that. Leander agreed with me but bet it would take longer. The other two disagreed but Saros said you would kick him out of the camp.” Ferelith chirped.
“Over the fucking mess hall’s cookies?” I furrowed my brows.
“Yup.” She smiled.
“Fucking mess hall cookies.” I sighed.
+
Over the next 5 years Cassian visited off and on, his final visit however felt off; he was anxious and on edge the entire three days he stayed with me.
“What's wrong?” I mumbled sitting against the headboard.
Cassian was laying on his stomach with his head in my lap, The silk sheets exposing the upper portion of his naked body as he bathed his wings in the rays of sun that came through the windows.
“Something just feels off, like something wrong is happening. I'm worried about Rhys, it's been 45 years, Az’s spies can't even get anywhere near the mountain yet. I dont know im just a big ball of anxiety and at the same time its making me want to be protective over you and all of my family.” Cassian sighed nuzzling against my stomach and thighs.
I ran my fingers through his hair, “I’m sure it will all be okay Cass.”
Oh how wrong I was on that, it would not be okay. It would not be okay for at least 6 more years. I had ended up pregnant after Cassian's last visit, I had waited to tell him till the next time he appeared at my doorstep; but he didnt show, I got letters from him for sure. After our child had been born, a male that was undeniably ours, with Cassian’s tanned skin, hazel eyes, and black hair but my massive and white wings.
I had ended up never truly telling Cassian, even when I had seen him for a split moment during the war with hybern. I had seen him in passing, dragging Larissa into a medtent while he was dragged into a medtent by Azriel and Rhys. The other two had no clue about the real nature of our relationship, that he had fathered the next heir of the star children’s bloodline.
By the time Rhys had released my squadron to go back to Angelsrest, I had yet to see Cassian but had got the privilege to meet my sister in law Feyre. I missed my boy, I had named him Rigel, after a star in the sky above my camp; and was just ready to go home and have him back in my arms. I dismissed the thought of searching for Cassian and regrouped with my generals.
My wings had ended up being fairly tattered around the edges of the membrane, the flight home was rough with the cold biting at the new wounds. We all landed and Rigel was bouncing beside Ferelith, he called out for me and jumped into my arms. Thankfully my camp suffered no major losses, it was handy being a specialist team with advanced training, our worst injury had been Larissa’s wing: A sword had gone through one of them and ripped a major hole through it, thankfully a healer managed to get the wing to heal itself back together with minor scarring.
Life continued on as it had before the war, before Cassian, with the addition of Rigel in the child classes we held. Everything had been food until Rhysand appeared at the front of camp. Solstice preparations were in progress, headed by a heavily pregnant Ferelith; she had been hooking up with Saros apparently since the bet.
I had come out of my study to force her to take a break when Rhys smiled at me, everyone in camp stilled and watched on silently; my wings flared in warning. The entire camp stayed silent until a loud cry broke out, I knew that cry… it was Rigel. I fought down my panic, as Ferelith waddled forward clutching Rigel in her grasp the best she could. His wings were scratched up and bloody, Saros was heading the children's class and was teaching them how to fly today; Rigel must have had a bad crash. Ferelith stilled when she saw Rhys there, but I motioned for Rigel to be brought up to me.
“Momma!” Rigel had cried in my arms and Rhys’s eyes widened.
“Sister… May we speak in private?” Rhys suggested eyed locked onto Rigel.
I motioned for him to join me in my home, but instead of my office I led him into a toy cluttered living room. I rocked Rigel and looked over his wings, Rhys sat stiffly across from me and his eyes never left Rigel’s tear-stained face.
“He looks inexplicably like Cassian.” Rhys bluntly stated.
“That's because he is Cassian’s” I snipped back at Rhys.
“How?” Rhys mumbled.
“Surely you know how babes are made, Rhys.” I said sarcastically.
“You know what I mean sister.” He deadpanned.
“About 11 years ago now, I sent a letter to you but you were under the mountain. Cassian came instead. We hit it off from there, about 6 years ago now I gave birth to Rigel here.” I replied.
Rigel’s sniffles slowed and he looked over at Rhys. “Rigel baby, this is your uncle Rhysand.”
Rugel waved at rhys and yawned, Rhys waved back and Rigel began rubbing at his eyes trying to fight off the exhaustion crying caused.
“He is astonishing. Does Cass know?” Rhys mumbled again.
“No I tried to tell him through letters but he never showed back up here, then at the war the only time I saw him was when you were dragging him into the med kit. I just resigned myself to keeping silent about it from Cassian.”I shrugged and Rigel nuzzled into my arm, soft snores coming from him.
“Oh. I’m sorry.” Rhys sighed.
“It's fine. You came here for a reason brother, what's wrong?” I changed the subject as quickly as I could.
“Well, originally I came here because both Feyre and I have been on this family united kick, and I suggested we invite you to Solstice. Feyre agreed, you see, it's also her birthday.” Rhys rambled. “But now with Rigel in the picture I believe you should come even more. It would be one hell of a solstice present.”
“Only if Rigel is welcome will I come and I will leave if there is any drama over him.” I stood my ground.
“GREAT! Wonderful! Absolutely! That is expected of you my dear sister, we can't wait to see you there, I’ll show you from the House of the Wind then?” Rhsy stood excitedly.
I nodded in agreement, the solstice was only a week away. I would have to prepare both myself and Rigel for the emotional roller coaster this very well could be.
When the week passed I strapped Rigel into fur covered leathers His wings were large, yes, and he could keep himself in the air for short periods of time and he could glide for sure, but he wouldn’t be able to make the flight between Velaris and our camp by himself, I had instructed him if he was tired to call out for me and I'd carry him. We would stay at the mountain house on solstice eve and Rhys would bring us down on solstice morning. He had written to me to tell everyone to expect to buy a present for a male illyrian child and for his sister. He had told me he bluffed when any of them asked, since he had explained I was his adopted sister who ran a camp for talented illyrians in the mountains and told them I had taken Rigel under my wing. He knew they would know the truth of his parentage the second they saw us but it was easier to bluff until we met them in person, so Cassian would still be surprised and Rigel would get solstice presents. Rigel tired out about a quarter of the way through the flight and I carried him the rest of the way to Velaris.
I had bought Rigel a set of play armor with siphons and a fake sword, for Rhys I had gotten him a sculpture from one of our artists i had seen him eyeing when he invited me to solstice, Cassian's gift was Rigel, i didn't know much of the others so I let Rhys pick out gifts for me.
Rhys was at the house with Feyre when I landed, both of them greeting me happily. Rigel was awake and jumped out of my arms to greet Rhys and Feyre. The latters eye widened as she processed who his sire had been.
“Oh my god he's Cassian’s isn't he?” She asked quickly.
Both Rhys and I nodded.
“Ohhhhhkay well tomorrow is going to be exciting.” Feyre sighed. “Get some rest you two we will see you in the morning.”
Rhys showed us to our rooms before he showed himself out. I tucked Rigel into his bed, and was tucking myself into my own when a knock came from my balcony door; Cassian was standing outside with an eager smile on his face. I motioned for him to enter my room and he did so eagerly, throwing himself into my arms.
“Hey there momma, I figured I should call you that now since you’ve taken that boy under your wing now.” Cassian purred in my arms as I played with his hair.
“Actually Cass, about that…” I mumbled.
“What’s up Momma?” Cass hummed.
“Come with me Cass, I want you to meet him, I think you two will get along.” I purred back at him.
Cassian agreed, and I pulled him into Rigel’s room. Rigel was fast asleep on his stomach, wings neatly tucked over the blanket to hold it in place. Cassian slinked forward and moved Rigel’s bangs from his face.
Cass sat at the side of his bed, running his fingers through the boy's hair. “He’s got your wings, you didn’t just take him under yours he is yours.”
“That he is Cass, but you’ve recognized something else too haven’t you.” I stepped forward lowering myself onto my knees in front of Cassian.
“He looks so familiar yet so different, like looking in a mirror.” Cassian mumbled.
“You know why that is right Cass?” I placed my hand on his knee and he looked over to me with those caramel puppy dog eyes.
“He's mine isn’t he?” Cassian had tears welling in his eyes.
“Yeah, Cassian, he is yours. I wanted to tell you earlier but you weren't able to come to the camp despite all my urging, and then the next time I saw you Rhysand and azriel were dragging you into a med tent.” I replied sadly.
“I could have had so much more time with you, I could have had a life with you earlier… Oh mother, I’ve missed so much of his life that I can’t make up for.” Cassian began quietly sobbing, as to not wake the child he now knew was his son.
“You can still be there for him Cass, I’m sure there is still room in our lives for you.” I mumbled.
“I’d love that. I really would. I’m just so sorry I couldn’t have been there earlier. I’ve been so miserable here doing Feyre and Rhys’s bidding. Feyre’s sister is my mate you see, but I have never wanted anything to do with her, and she's miserable to be around. I’ve thought about breaking it plenty of times and now you have just given me a solid reason to.” Cassian wiped his tears and grasped my hands in his.
“Cass…”I gave him a look of pity.
“You’d still have me then wouldn’t you? There would still be room for me wouldn’t there?” Cassian whimpered.
“Oh Cassian! Of course there is, like I told you there will always be a place open for you with me.” I pulled him down into a chaste kiss.
“I wish I could have been there for his younger years, I’ve missed so many milestones already.” Cassian sighed.
“Don’t worry Daddy, there's always more milestones ahead.” I soother him with an added nickname, he whimpered out a sob.
‘Can we have another one too? I wanna be there for the firsts at least once, I wanna be able to support you through everything at least once.” He begged softly.
“Oh my good boy of course we can, now lets go climb into bed, get some good sleep and in the morning we can go out together to the house. You can take Rigel with you to the snowball fight you told me about.” I mused.
“Rigel? That’s his name?” I nodded to Cassian’s question. “That’s the name of the star above your camp isn’t it? The star the father sent to guide you home?” Cassian sniffled.
“Yes, I named him after that star.” I nodded.
He pulled me up from the floor and spun me around. “To bed then?”
“To bed.” I nodded.
“So we can face tomorrow as a family united.” Cassian smiled brightly and pulled me into a kiss.
I knew from here on out Rigel and I’s lives would change forever, and Cassian would fit right into it as our missing pieces. Tomorrow I would let Cassian introduce himself to Rigel and the two could bond over the snowball fight with Rhysand and Azriel. Everything is going to be okay, and Cassian would make sure of that, he had purpose and reason now; he was excited to move forward with his son and to help bring in a new one and raise it, this time he would be there for the firsts he’d make sure of that.
Taglist: @lilah-asteria
#acotar x reader#acotar#a court of thorns and roses#acotar fanfiction#cassian acotar#cassian x reader
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*rolls into askbox*
🐲🐲🐲🐉🐉🐉🐈🐈🐈🐈⬛🐈⬛🐈⬛🐺🐺🐺
(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
adsklfjl well then 😌 (make me write game)
🐲 Los Angeles Fire Riders
Buck had just come out of the bunk room when the dragons let out calls of greeting and Copia—Chopper, as she preferred—descended into the courtyard. She was a Mauerfuchs, a high-flying courier and she used that for when surveillance and additional eyes on the scene were needed quickly. She also worked together with Tommy Kinard. Tommy, who also happened to be Buck’s boyfriend and a real badass pilot. Pilots worked together with just their dragon partner and if the situation called for it, they went their separate ways. In the middle of the air that was. So Tommy had a specialised harness and always wore a wingsuit and parachute when he was working with Chopper. Chopper herself were a light harness with barely any equipment. “Hey Tommy,” was all he could say before his boyfriend kissed him.
🐉 Would you still love me if I was a wyrm?
So far, Eddie’s first shift as a dragon had been fairly uneventful. There had been no big calls and nothing he could really do to help. They would still have to figure out what he could actually do as a firefighter now. Bobby had made sure he could still work: nothing in his contract had said otherwise and a quick talk with the union rep had confirmed it. Eddie was still a member of the LAFD, just of a different shape. For most of the shift he had found good spots at the firehouse to nap at and to be out of the way and on calls he had taken to perching on Buck’s shoulder. They—he, to be honest—had gotten a lot stares, pointed fingers and of course phones were pointed his way. Dragons were not common in cities at all and so Eddie tried to ignore it but he could not say that he liked the attention either. There was a young child who had come up to Buck and timidly asked to pet his dragons before her father had noticed where his daughter had absconded to and carried her away. “That might become a problem,” Buck said as he gently scratched Eddie behind the horns and drew his fingers along Eddie’s back just the way he liked it. “Then maybe stop petting your boyfriend in public so it actually looks like he is working,” Chimney said with a grin but after Eddie’s affirmative nod he belied his words and let his hand run over Eddie’s back as well.
🐈 Werecat AU
“Give me a moment to wake up properly,” Tommy murmured and got up to pad over to the bathroom. Buck got up too, went down the stairs and sat down at the kitchen island with a glass of water. He was happy with Tommy—he was! They had been courting for a month and it was the happiest he had been in a relationship in a long time, if not ever. There was nothing that was missing, not really. And yet… What Tommy had said had unburied the feelings for Eddie that Buck had shoved deep down and hoped to forget after Shannon had died and they had grown apart. Evidently he was not nearly as ‘over Eddie’ as he had let himself believe and deep down he had known that for a long time. “You are thinking too much,” said Tommy wryly and pressed a quick kiss to the top of Buck’s head. “We have a lot to talk about but I don’t think there’s any need to start catastrophizing just yet, baby.” He sat down on the chair next to Buck and took a deep swig from the water Buck had gotten him. “There are still feelings between the two of you,” he immediately got to the question at hand squeezed Buck’s knee, letting his hand settle there. “And they go both ways even if you pretend that it’s in the past.”
🐈⬛ Cat Burglar
Buck liked the roofs; he felt unseen, unnoticed – which was the point really – he liked the perspective that hadn’t been intended for anybody living in the castle. And this perspective allowed him to see things that he would have otherwise missed. Like the small courtyard at the very edge of the castle – nestled between the storage houses and the castle wall itself. It would have been quite unremarkably if it was only that, but what made it interesting to Buck was what was inside the courtyard. A mountain lion. And it didn’t look like it had gotten into the courtyard by accident – if that was even possible. The mountain lion wore a heavy leather collar, reinforced by iron. It was connected to all three of the courtyard’s walls by strong chains. There was no way that the lion could move more than three feet in any direction. Buck had finished his job – nearly at the very least. All he had to do now was to successfully leave the castle. But this was no way to keep an animal – why did they even have a mountain lion in the first place?
🐺 Werewolf Hunters
“We’ll do you a favour tonight, boys,” Herne sneered at them but Tommy paid him no attention as the hatch between his and Eddie’s cell rose. He did not wait for it to open fully and squeezed through as soon as he could. “Enjoy it while it lasts!” The hatch fell shut behind him but he did not care. Evan joined them a moment later and then the two of them carefully nosed around Eddie to find out how he had been hurt. A hit to the head, certainly, given his sluggish, dazed movement—a low-grade concussion probably. Some bruises all over his body too, like they all had by now. But he still flicked his ears as if to wave away their worry and caught Tommy’s head between his paws to lick his muzzle. With a deep sigh, Tommy settled by his side and started to groom his boyfriends as best as he could stuck in a kennel that was much too small for the three of them. At least he was close to them once again and could hold them. Until the hunters would take them away from him again, but for now he would enjoy the moment as much as was possible.
#oops so many words#i hope you enjoy them hayden! <3#scream back at the universe#cannibalhellhound#make me write game#los angeles fire riders#would you still love me if i was a wyrm?#werecat au#cat burglar au#full moon shift au#buddie#bet#buddietommy#polyfire#my writing
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⭐️ i would love to hear any director’s commentary about point of pride!
Okay, I got this and my mind proceeded to go COMPLETELY BLANK of anything to talk about. So since this one is more general about the AU, I’m going to talk about the Aulendi.
I often tell people that if I could be anything in the world, I would want to be a Ñoldor elf, despite the murder. This is because I love making stuff, and really love how significant it is to their culture and identity. (and problems. I must not forget the problems.) So the majority of the Aulendi either a) do things I really want to do, or b) do things I have at least a little experience with. Which is why I love writing them, and loved building out their world.
TaÞarwen is (I think) the first one that I wrote in, and I sort of made her and that scene out of a combination of things, including: my dislike of fast fashion as an institution, my love of the Gender Neutral Skirt ™ (seriously, so many people wore ‘skirts’ for so much of history. They are SO much easier than pants), and my conviction that making proper clothing takes a whole lot of time and effort.
(You may notice that Findaráto still doesn’t have the custom outfits. Because it takes time to craft something Really Really Nice, and immortal elves who are also devotees of the god of craft most definitely take the time to Do Things Right.
That said, it IS coming up!)
And the other significant ones we’ve seen are Meryanilda and Tiquwen. My experience with harps is definitely on the ‘making’ rather than the ‘playing’ side, but I’m still very new to making them, and have only dabbled. Still, I enjoyed getting to feature them and the sort of interplay between their craft, practiced by the Aulendi, and someone like Makalaurë, who has a competitive AND collaborative desire to work around and with the masters of HIS craft. Which is practiced to less of an institutional degree among the Aulendi.
When I started planning this story and universe, I started from the threesome and worked outward. What safe place could Findaráto find? What made Fëanáro’s family different from the other Ñoldor to such a degree that they had completely separate gender roles and social culture?
…It had to be craft. The fact that there is a culture in which craft is important and respected is still very different from a culture of craftspeople. Historically speaking, however much craftspeople were respected (or not) they were not a ruling class. Ruling classes are generally politicians, by birthright or (more rarely) election, religious leaders, and economic ones. Similarly, in my reading experience, I see few examples of actual craftspeople among the royal Ñoldor. The specific examples are Míriel (dead), Fëanáro (…complicated), Mahtan (among Aule’s folk, not Tirion, not royal), Nerdanel (same as Mahtan, don’t know if/how she fit into the court, but my guess is no), and Curufinwë II and III.
Most of the next generation comes into their own in Beleriand. They’re politicians, rulers, warriors, generals. They build things, yes, like cities (Turgon and Finrod), ships (Eärendil, with clear Telerin influence from Círdan), and Maeglin (half-Sindar, specifically learned smithing from his Sindarin father and not his Ñoldorin mother). There are a few other notable smiths, but still. Not directly in or from the ruling line, save Curufinwës 1-3.
(I'm not saying they aren't a culture of crafters, I'm just saying for the purposes of this story, I engineered a split working off of a potential subdivision in canon. Also, a culture is more than just the ruling line, that's only where we tend to focus because those are the significant and named figures in canon)
So that’s kind of where the split came from, in Point of Pride. The Ñoldor respect craft, and it is what their culture is known for, but most of the people who specifically devote themselves to it as a calling can be found in Aulë’s lands, which I feel has at least a little canonical justification. Even if they wouldn’t see themselves as priests, disseminating the work and ideas formed in his forges to the broader Ñoldorin culture at large is kind of the role they play in this story. And because of the physical and social distance, they had the room to develop in a drastically different way (as much as the two-way unawareness might be a bit unrealistic). I like the idea that the farther one gets from a strict social ‘court’ and the closer one gets to a sort of egalitarian unification of ideals and purpose in proximity to a literal deity, the more protected one gets from strict social consequences. And the less close someone is likely to look. Like nuns, who were allowed/required to eschew the social requirement of marriage for religious purposes (not an expert, don’t quote me on that). I’m not saying the Aulendi are religious figures to that sort of strict level, but by opting into the inner circle of a Vala, they are effectively opting out of the monarchy and the social structure of the Ñoldor, knowingly or not.
(Yes, this will cause problems later.)
Well, that was probably way too much!! Thank you for the chance to (over) explain some thoughts I had! I hope you enjoy reading this excessive wall of text, and thank you for the ask!
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