#we got our doctor & lizard-man

[poobur79]

Star Trek Lower Decks got the job done with Garashir.

I’m looking at you next, kalluzeb! Get on the ball, Star Wars!

[ruthlessrps]

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐍𝐄𝐘'𝐒 𝐌𝐔𝐋𝐀𝐍 (𝟏𝟗𝟗𝟖) 𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒. - feel free to make any adjustments as necessary!

"we're under attack!"

"send your troops to protect my people."

"one man could be the difference between victory and defeat."

"the doctor said three cups of tea in the morning and three at night."

"i'm going to... pray some more."

"how lucky can they be? they're dead."

"we're gonna turn this sow's ear into a silk purse."

"you'll bring honour to us all."

"boys will gladly go to war for you."

"boys want girls with good taste."

"an apple for serenity, a pendant for balance, beads of jade for beauty..."

"help me not to make a fool of me."

"reflect before you act. this shall bring you honour and glory."

"you will never bring your family honour."

"i'm not meant to play this part."

"if i were truly to be myself, i would break my family's heart."

"i cannot hide who i am, though i've tried."

"you dishonour me."

"it is an honour to protect my country and my family."

"so you'll die for honour?"

"i will die doing what's right."

"i know my place. it is time you learned yours."

"you should go after her. she could be killed."

"if you're gonna stay, you're gonna work."

"not a lizard. i don't do that tongue thing."

"if i was my real size your cow here would die of fright."

"i'm just nervous. i've never done this before."

"what are you looking at?"

"i'm gonna hit you so hard it'll make your ancestors dizzy."

"i don't need anyone causing trouble in my camp."

"you forgot your sword."

"for what it's worth, i think you're a great captain."

"you like him, don't you?"

"i should have your head for that."

"the local girls thought you were quite the charmer."

"how about a girl who's got a brain, who always speaks her mind?"

"he thinks he's such a ladykiller."

"i have a girl back home who's unlike any other."

"the only girl who'd love him is his mother."

"you just gave away our position!"

"you are the craziest man i've ever met, and for that i owe you my life."

"a life for a life. my debt is repaid."

"i should never have left home."

"at least you had good intentions."

"are we in this together or not?"

"keep your eyes open. i know they're here."

"your walls and armies have fallen."

"bow to me."

"no matter how the wind howls, the mountain cannot bow to it."

"i've heard a great deal about you."

"you fight good."

"the flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all."

"you don't meet a girl like that every dynasty."

"would you like to stay for dinner?"

"would you like to stay forever?"

[queerbaitingbutikissgirls]

Part 2

Ship: Sevika x reader

Synopsis: Your second day at the clinic, sevika has technical problems with her mechanical arm and we learn more about our OC’s life.

Amidst the chaos of the clinic the break room didn't earned it's name. The charged schedule don't let place to much time.

Morning was to patch up of last night's patrol, midday was body modification something the lizard women seemed to be in charge of, afternoon left place to fighter care. I didn't knew but apparently a lot of the fighter in the ring where silco's man. They bring back part of the reward to silco and if I understood right they also work for him as patrol. I'm not sure how it work but anyway money is money in the undercity.

The day start to slow down as the alarm clock indicates 8pm. I was less exhausted than yesterday but nonetheless I felt like my feet were about to falter under my weight. "Do you wanna go home?" Asked Darius with a sorry gaze. But before I could answer I remembered her words from last night. You didn't last the night. I take a breath it before straightening my back. "No I'm good!" The doctor smiled proudly at me.

I turned around as I heard shuffling. It was the lizard women taking off her brown blouse. "I will then. You don't need two healers at night. I did enough night shift for a life time." She said before grabbing her bag and leaving the room without a goodbye. I turned toward the doctor a confused look on my face. "Don't mind the lack of manner she mean well trust me." I was about to answer him when the door opened stealing both of our attention.

"Right on time." The doctor said trying to hide the glimpse of fear behind his usual smile. She barely glanced at him making her way to one of the hospital bed where she sat making the poor wheel squeak under her weight. She really has no manners, I thought to myself. The doctor nervously followed her to the bed and I followed behind to assist him like I usually did.

The tall women even sat down was half a head taller than me. Darius inspected her mechanical arm carefully. The usual purple light coursing through the metal arm stopped halfway through it around the elbow region. "It seems to be stuck." Observed the doctor. "Find a solution." She said loudly making the poor doctor's shoulders jump. "I need to look at jinx's note." He answered anxiously as I roll my eyes at the brute that was this women. If I found her intriguing before I now only found her irritating.

the doctor walked away to find the shared note book but I kept my gaze on the mechanical arm as the light reflected on something in between two pieces. I suddenly saw a little screw in the inside of her metallic elbow here was the problem it probably belonged somewhere else and fell lose inside the mechanics. Without thinking I try to reach in between the metal to grab the screw but the metal almost close around the tip of my finger pinching the delicate skin. "Ouch don't tense yourself I'm trying to help you you idiot!" I said looking at her entire body flexing away from my touch. I shake my hand before looking at my painfully red finger and sigh. Her gaze seemed even more frustrated than usual. Maybe at the fact I just talked to her so carelessly, but in the moment I didn’t even noticed I had just called silco’s right arm and idiot.

I looked back at the arm where the screw had now fell a bit deeper. "Fuck, don't move I think I can still reach it." She listened and didn't moved but looked at me with an annoyed glance. "What are you talking about." I sigh already annoyed by my previous painful attempt. I didn't though she would be so chatty all of a sudden. "A screw got loose and felt between the mechanism. Now would you stay still so we can both get out of here with all our fingers?" I froze for a second and then looked back and forth at her and her mechanic arm as I realized what I just said. "You know what I meant." I shake my head before focusing back on the task trying to hide the subtle blush creeping on my cheeks due to my thought less sentence.

As I take the screw and put it back in the rest of the arm regained it's glow. I took a step back not sure of how that mechanic work and not wanting to risk any other injuries. "Good job y/n." The doctor said putting a hand on my shoulder and I almost jumped.

Sevika looked down at her arm flexing her fist a few times to make sure it worked properly. What did she expected that I broke it? I thought fighting the urge to roll my eyes again.

As I took another step back to let the doctor take care of her I let out a breath I didn't knew I kept in. another women entered the room with a big cut across her forehead so I left Darius take care of Sevika as I went to take care of the new patient.

____

The clock showed half past two and me and the doctor were both slumped over uncomfortable chair in the break room. "You did good kid you should go home it's late enough." He said before looking at the clock. "When do you go home?" I asked curiously and maybe slightly worried that I never saw him leave this place in the past two days. "I close the clinic around 3" he said with heavy eyes. So it did close I started to worry it was an endless clinic. So it was 10 to 3 quite a long shift.

I stood up from my chair to go grab my bag, he said I could go, plus he would close it in 30 minutes. So I made my way towards the door ready to enjoy a good night of sleep.

My hopes ended up way too high as my sleep was filled with nightmares. Scream and fire and death all of them polluting my brain setting an unavoidable curse on my mind. When I woke up in sweat it was already half past seven. I decided that going back to sleep was useless and stretched my arms before letting out a loud yawn. The house was already filled with footsteps and feminine voices. I climbed down my bunk bed to come face to face with an empty lower bunk. Not surprised at all I exit the room to the smell of cinnamon as two teenager giggling ran down the corridor. As I made it into the kitchen there she was sitting at the table kicking her leg as she put a big spoon of cinnamon oatmeal in her mouth.

"Don't eat so fast you'll choke on it." I say playfully putting a caring hand on her head. Her big eyes sparkled as she looked up at me. She wrap her tiny arm around me. "You're back." She said against my stomach. When she let go of me I get down on my knee to be at her height. "Of course I told you I'll always be there."  I said smiling at my sister.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

hi! i don't know if you're familiar with monsterverse titans (godzilla, kong, mothra etc.), do you think it's possible for them to exist in the same universe as twilight vampires? they would have been around for millions of years, probably longer than vampires have ever existed. pretty much all of them were hibernating so it's technically impossible to encounter one... at least until 1954 when the humans accidentally woke godzilla up

sure a lot of titans are dangerous but since godzilla is basically a one man volturi army but for titans, so aro wouldn't have to worry about human extinction from them

but do you think the volturi might have a branch dedicated to tracking titans' locations, kind of like monarch?

would godzilla deem vampires as threats to the balance of nature or, since the volturi basically keeps them in control, will he just ignore them and think of them as very very durable humans?

human titans. that's pretty much what vampires are. lmao.

and the cullens! can you imagine if they were unfortunate enough to be in a town where two titans picked to be their battleground? or forks. we have carlisle and some doctors and charlie and the quileute tribe hanging around post battle helping injured survivors, meanwhile edward is insisting to everyone in his family that this is absolutely an evil convoluted plan aro cooked up to... to... well he doesn't know what but it's something evil. and then it cuts to aro sobbing in the corin tower because godzilla is using the colosseum as a cat bed (and unintentionally destroying parts of it in the process)

wait wait wait, the cullens might even be able to find better prey if they move to hollow earth! Maybe the prey there would taste better over their usual 'vegeterian' choices

i will probably write the fic like you've suggested to askers many times, i'm just curious about your thoughts if you've watched the films. they've got probably one of my favourite worldbuilding lore.

also i hope you and vinelle are doing okay! i wait in anticipation for any of your stories to be updated. take your time on them though. we've been fed so much the first half of this year which has been amazing

@therealvinelle are doing fine, summering away.

And yeah, my friend, this is a "write the fic" ask, but mainly because it's very clear what you have in mind and you don't need me to say yea or nea. Have fun! Be the captain of your own adventure!

(gif credit @franzias-cave)

That said, I think it's plausible for a number of reasons. Anon's referring to the fact that most of the time someone asks "can X crossover happen" I say no because usually either a) either world would look extremely different and the crossover would not be what we would know b) one would give way to the other. Either we have our vampire overlords wiping out that other threat to humanity/the secret as they did the werewolves in the world of Twilight or the vampires never become the apex predator.

In this case, as you noted, if these creatures hibernate most of the time how the fuck would anyone know they're around? The Volturi are 3500 years old but that's nothing in the scheme of human existence let alone how old the giant lizards are supposed to be.

And that they live in the bottom of the ocean--could be just none of them have surfaced.

They can absolutely exist while the Twilight world exists.

Now upon becoming aware of each other there's a "what are we going to do about this?" but I imagine that the Volturi would let humans handle the tracking. Unless the humans are very bad at it the Volturi are busy enough if Demetri can't find where these things are.

In terms of Godzilla killing vampires... we don't know what vampires are or where they came from in the twilight world, but it seems to have been for a fairly long time. Point is, I don't think they disrupt the balance of nature by existing any more than humans do.

But yes, write the fic! You have my encouragement!

[freewifi-png-exe]

I just had the most fascinating round I have ever played on SS14, it was on Harmony server and I just have to write it out.

I began the shift as Wes Strange, the detective. I printed off a few extra copies of forensics reports just in case I'd need them, and then got off to smoking cigars and looking cool. Typical casework, the clown overdosed in the bathroom and doctors couldn't save him, bit of paperwork but not too bad. At least until a bomb rocks the station, the bar has exploded!

I quickly arrive on the scene to find the dear captain spread all over the walls of the room. A paramedic comes in to pick his brain off the floor and carry it to science while I begin investigating for clues. Not even 5 minutes into my work, however, does a report come in that the perpetrator has turned himself in!

Seeing my work done, I begin investigating other cases. A tourist on vacation is suntanning in the hallway, a thief is caught attempting to make a lair in the bathroom, a cult calling itself "the book club" is operating out of the library, and the halls are crawling with giant spiders!

Meanwhile, Station Command has met in the bridge to determine who should succeed the late Captain. In a complete divergence from SOP, they elect Todd, a talking lizard (not a lizard-person, just a full-on monitor lizard who speaks English) to serve as captain. Captain Todd assumes the position for a good quarter of the shift before Central Command checks their inbox and, enraged, demands that the station Head of Security replace Todd immediately. Todd writes one more sad announcement before stepping into his new life as washed-up lizard at the bar.

It is at this moment that glass all around the station starts exploding. Todd, still wearing his old captain outfit tells me that the cracks on the glass and the ripped up floor panels were due to some supernatural force. I move to the Cargo department and a technician tells me the same story. I have to get to the bottom of this!

As I pace about the halls, lights flicker frantically and crack, terrifying me. I go to the only man I know can help me, Eric, the head of the cult. When I get there, however, he tells me "the book club's been canceled" and that he's "out of the game", that he's "seen too much". I panic. Nobody on this station can save us but him and his occult knowledge! I hastily make a deal with him: If I can return his confiscated scarf from the security department, he will lead the seance to destroy the entity once and for all.

I demand the scarf from the Warden who ultimately relents, and hand it over to Eric who begins preparing the altar. I call out for supporters, and a glitched-out robot, a pianist, and a scientist show up. Each of us places a plunger on our heads like we had seen the cult do before as Eric, now in robes, prepares a needle.

The lights flicker frantically! We hear a voice! The spectre is upon us!! Then, suddenly: the mime, Adeline Garland, stumbles into the room with a knife to her throat and kills herself on the altar. The spectre appears!! We all scream and begin to beat it with whatever weapons we can find and it collapses into a foamy mist. It is defeated.

And that is only act 1 lmfao there was a whole demonic possession after that which i might write about tomorrow

[lesbiandanhowell]

Sam reacts to: Dan and Phil React to Every Phil is not on fire! #2

I am not ready for this in the slightest but here we go

- Why THAT clip from pinof, they made fun of it the whole time in the first video yet they keep coming back to it.

- I still have a sharpie in my drawer...

- The way they continue the dressing alike theme it is so cute, and Dan asking how Phil still has the same shirt when he literally is wearing the exact same mhmh sure.

- WHY AM I SO AFRAID OF PINOF 4

- "because you're 12" They have always known their audience a little too much, like they know that now we're all adults and gay back then they knew we were all just teens.

- I am sobbing with laughter 3 minutes in AND JUST NOTICED IT IT IS 32 MINUTES LONG.

- STOP DAN YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO CALL ME OUT LIKE THIS. I am the number one person that points out little giggles after cuts this is LITERALLY a personal attack. I have done this for almost every single gamingmas video so sadly this is not a call out for past me but very much attacking me right now.

- THE AMOUNT OF ATTACKS IN THIS. Phil making fun of the nose smudge, like they just are coming for us left and right holy shit

- Tumblr mention, Dan if you don't want to see us be obnoxious about you guys touching then don't come on tumblr, let us be weird in peace.

- LMAO THE SUNDAY TIMES TRAUMA FOR DAN

- I am literally crying 11 minutes in and I am kind of glad they just didn't mention the 2012 trauma because I don't think I could go through talking about it.

- Dan reblogging this video but not any other recent gaming video... He's got priorities and it is calling us tf out, I see how it is.

- PHIL TALKING ABOUT THE BEDSHEETS AND JUST TALKING HIMSELF INTO A HOLE. Like I would have thought he meant Sharpie getting on it but he just fully went there and made it sound sexual.

- They keep making fun of us and then they keep doing the neck touch thing and like HOW ARE WE MEANT TO NOT LOSE OUR MINDS.

- "I think the vibes are better in this one" Yes, 2013 PINOF will always be better because 2012 was traumatic in ways we don't talk about.

- "Oh your tongue action there Dan" PHIL WHAT THE FUCK MAN

- Not them leaving out any kind of reaction to the "you are [special]", it would have been too real.

- Dan with the peach emoji for phils bum what

- THE LIZARD DUET AND THE WAY PHIL LOOKS AT DAN FUCK YOU AND FUCK YOU. Genuinely how do you expect me not to comment on that, I am lonely and single and living vicariously through you being sappy.

- The fuck did Dan say to make Phil laugh and me sob with laughter like it was so funny even tho I have no idea what he said. Dan doing a little squeak when he laughs is adorable, like at the very end.

- Phil I will literally fight you if you keep doing an impression of us going they are touching like fuck you let us have some peace. (I won't actually, we deserve this)

- The way Phil looks ACTUALLY sad when Dan explains that the existential crisis branding was just him suffering in silence, now we know this but back then it just seemed funny :(

- The fact they put themselves on the same level as Doctor Who and Sherlock is insane but so real, like they really were.

- NOT THE CATBOY MENTION AGAIN I LITERALLY ALMOST DROPPED MY FAVOURITE MUG. I wish this was a joke but I had such a visceral reaction I almost pulled my favourite mug off my desk.

- THEY PLAYED POPPY AT 4AM WHAT. They have only learned so much since then have they.

This send me places I didn't know I could experience and Dan saying to expect the next one in the next few weeks scares me that it won't be during Gamingmas anymore.

Check #sam reacts for posts about all videos and see you tomorrow!

[pbandjesse]

The nausea is wild today. Last night was really really bad. We reached out to my rhumatologist and our regular doctor today, and was given some advice on something to take. Because this is no joke, it is very very bad.

I ended up laying on our bedroom floor for a while last night. Just so sure I was going to be sick. I was just repeating to myself "please stop" and just trying to breathe. I never actually threw up but it was not a fun time.

Eventually I would move to the bed and was able to fall asleep. The pain subsided a bit and I was able to rest.

I woke up at 7 and didn't tell as bad. James was all smiles and I was really happy to see them. I love them so much.

They helped me get my stuff together and we left the house together. They would end up with a flat tire pretty soon after leaving and would have to go back for the other bike. But they would make it safely to work.

I would have a pretty uneventful drive. I would mostly feel fine all morning. I got to camp and cut the clay for the day. And watched a video. And has my breakfast. I was happy that I wasn't feeling so bad.

I went down to the nurse to update her on how I was feeling. And I found Callie there. She had had a health scare last week and I felt so bad that that happened to her!! We did get to spend a little more time together today when her SSC girls came up to help clean some outdoor chairs and get bracelet string. I hate that our schedules just do not line up this year. And I hate that I've been such a baby and can't stay at camp. But I just truly need the comfort of home. Especially now that I don't feel well.

I would take a walk to go give Heather a hug. And we chatted about some issues I've overheard with counselors and the picnic grove and just the amount of trash people are leaving everywhere this year. We brain stormed a bit but soon I was off.

I had a nice morning. My first group was running late but that was fine. Everyone seemed more tired today. Less creative almost. Like they were struggling with coming up with ideas more then they have been. But everyone seemed to still have fun. I did have one little girl try so hard but did not succeed and after some quiet tears she just asked to make a bead lizard. I was of course like yes absolutely. I felt bad that she felt bad. She was much happier by the end of the class.

At lunch I would stay at arts and crafts and have my little snack. I chatted with SarahMarie. And I tried to stay cool. Because I was so hot and it was not helping the nausea which came back with a vengeance.

Day camp was good. And while it was getting much hotter, I was doing my best to just stay in the shade and support the kids and have a good day. Not let the counselors who were at the picnic grove and letting their kids run crazy bother me. I was doing alright. I was knitting and sipping water and having a good time.

But man was I ready to go home. Stockade was my last group. And it was nice hanging out with Jorge. And teaching some of the boys how to make bracelets. It was fun but I was so ready to go. Me and James had plans to go get dinner and get some things at target.

So I was pretty distressed when Celia texted me she was coming to visit camp at 4! I knew she was supposed to come visit but I thought she was coming during the day so I thought she changed her mind when I didn't get a text. But it turned out I did get a text but I just missed it. And there was a miscommunication about 4pm because that's when our BBQ on Sunday is!! I was so upset but she's going to come to camp tomorrow instead. And I was able to leave and everything was okay.

The pain in my stomach was coming back though. And I was really happy to go home. The traffic wasn't amazing. And it took an extra 15 minutes. When I got back all I wanted was a shower.

So that is what I did. I charged my phone and showered and waited for James upstairs.

When James got home they were so smiley and they were ready to go! So we went out into the world.

We got five guys and it was very good but I started feeling very unwell half way through eating. I still got a milkshake after and would slowly drink that over an hour.

We had a nice meal and talked and laughed and it was just so good to be together. Even when I feel so bad I'm just so happy with my husband.

We went to target next. We got snacks and veggies for Crabcake and new potting soil. We got the recommended meds for my nausea. And some berries. I was quickly losing steam though and was very happy to go home.

When we got back here we were both very very surprised to see Crabcake just walking across the living room floor!! I didn't put the lid on all the way and he escaped! I'm so glad he was just out and about because man I would have been so upset.

We decided to bring Crabcake and Sweetp outside. I laid on the porch swing while James filled the grass pots with more soil. Watered all the plants. I would get to hot though and came inside. James brought everyone in soon after that and went to do their podcast with their friends.

And I worked on this post. I am really looking forward to closing my eyes. It's barely 8 and I am just so very beat. Tomorrow should be a good day. With nice groups and Celia visiting and then we are having dinner (?) with the Fulwilers. It's art scape so it might be crazy. But I truly hope I don't feel to bad. I really hope this medicine works.

Goodnight everyone. I love you all. Until next time.

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

A couple of announcements

//Got a few things I need to make you all aware of.

1 - Unavailability

//First of all I understand that this is very annoying, and frankly I find it annoying too, but I'm not going to be available to post for the next week as of today. This is because basically every day that I post, I'm preoccupied with some other matter.

//I have a doctors appointment on Friday for long lasting health issues, a wedding to attend on Sunday and Monday, and a funeral on Tuesday. So you probably won't be saying any genuine posts from me until Wednesday next week earliest.

//It's frankly very inconvinient, but these are important matters and I hope you can understand.

2 - Warriors of Other Worlds Release Date

//The second is that the beginning of the Warriors of Other Worlds arc, AKA the Danganronpa X Death Battle crossover that I set up at the end of last year will be dropping on the first day of March.

//I've addressed concerns about running the arc alongside the main story once already, but I believe that unlike the previous examples, we shouldn't have any real problems this time, considering this is very much a side spinoff arc and meant for more fun than anything else.

//Also, all the chapters are already pre-written and prepared, so you don't need to worry about delays or anything of that sort. There are a few things I want to make you all aware of in regards to this special event.

These will be the matchups that you all voted for, and unlike the other arcs, they will be available to read on Tumblr and ALSO Wattpad and AO3.

The release dates for the battles and the battles themselves are listed below (or at least the dates I HOPE for these battles to be up in the instance that something bad happens): 1: Makoto Naegi Vs Phoenix Wright (Ace Attorney) - March 1st 2: Mukuro Ikusaba Vs Kaede Kayano (Assassination Classroom) -March 4th 3: Akane Owari Vs Chie Satonaka (Persona 4) - March 7th 4: Peko Pekoyama Vs Right-Hand Man (Henry Stickmin) - March 10th 5: Sakura Ogami Vs Jonathan Joestar (JoJo's Bizarre Adventure) - March 13th 6: Narumi Osone Vs Himiko Toga (My Hero Academia) - March 16th 7: Mikan Tsumiki Vs Fluttershy (My Little Pony) - March 19th 8: Komaru Naegi Vs Katie Mitchell (The Mitchell's Vs the Machines) - March 22nd 9: Kaede Akamatsu Vs Sara Chidouin (Your Turn To Die) - March 25th 10: Seiko Kimura Vs The Lizard (Marvel/Spider-Man) - March 28th 11: Hajime Hinata Vs Izuku Midoriya (My Hero Academia) - March 31st 12: Junko Enoshima Vs Monika (Doki Doki Literature Club) - April 3rd

I did the analysis and created this arc in tandem with two friends of mine in the DB community at university. Let the record say that we are in no way biased towards the Danganronpa characters, and don't intend to give that impression. We personally do not care about the verdict so long as we can make an entertaining display and analysis for you all. But we are a team of three people, so if there are some things we portray incorrectly or get wrong, don't hold it against us. We appreciate constructive feedback given to us calmly and appropriately; but also know that we won't be going back to make changes to the verdicts we've put in place. These are our final says on the matter, and whether you accept that or not is fine and shouldn't matter in the end.

In relation to this, I know how the death battle fandom is and I'm aware that it can be toxic at its worst, so I'm warning you all now that any toxicity will be treated appropriately with a permanent ban from the blog.

I've said this before, but this event is completely unofficial and fan-based. I'm not endorsed by the official Death Battle channel in any way shape or form. I know I don't need to say that, but I will.

//Any other rules that pertain to the event itself will be posted on the day of release. I will be doing regular posts of this event, so I hope you look forward to that.

3 - Clearing the Ask Box

//I haven't quite decided when I will do it, but I have so many asks in the box right now and it's more than I'm physically capable of keeping up with. So pretty soon, I will be clearing the box and starting from scratch.

//So this is just a shoutout that if you have any unanswered asks that date back to a while ago, I won't be overviewing them and if you really want me to answer them, I advise you send them again.

//I will let you guys know when this happens though.

4 - Naegibowl Poll

//The last thing I wanted to talk about briefly is that fairly recently, I made a poll asking the readers of the blog how they would like me to handle the relationship dynamic for Makoto Naegi.

//As things stand, Makoto is under the eye of three different girls; Kyoko, Mukuro and Sayaka, but is already married to one of them; Kyoko.

//People do still like to tease all three for their feelings for him, and I have hinted before, especially recently due to some asks, that the three girls also feel something for each other as well as Makoto, so I put up a poll to ask what I should do with that information: Either leave things as they are and let Makoto have one bride, or go the ploycule route.

//Based on the results, the popular opinion seems to be to give all the girls a happy ending. Which you know what? I'm totally ok with.

//Don't expect anything soon, but I will act upon the results of this poll as soon as I can in the third phase of the story, assuming I actually get there.

//And that's all I have to announce for now. Hope you stay tuned for the updates and look forward to what I have in store.

-Mod

[ourlordapollo]

So earlier this month I put together a plot wheel using three different story theories.

If you haven't seen it, I basically combined 3 different plot skeletons into one wheel because, as an aspiring pubpished author, I found myself struggling with plot structures that focused on things/genres I didn't care about.

Namely, it's REALLY HARD to find plotting advice that doesn't mention "bad guys" in some way, and I'm more interested in writing the kind of introspective, pretentious, philosophical man vs self novels that all the dark academia bloggers drool over.

So I made my wheel and decided to test it on an existing story to see how it holds up. And what did I decide was the best fit for my introspective, pretentious, philosophical man vs self plot wheel?

That's right, famous distant POV sci-fi horror/thriller novel Jurassic Park :)

Spoilers: It still worked. Jurassic Park is also noticeably bereft of "bad guys," and that's what is really important to me.

This will be more useful to you if you've actually read Jurassic Park, jsyk.

Let's begin.

Here's a shitty picture of the wheel for your squinting-at pleasure

The steps along the wheel are as follows:

In the ORDER-LIE realm, we have Hook, Setup, Inciting Event, Buildup, and 1st Plot Point (1st half)

In the CHAOS-LIE realm, we have 1st Plot Point (2nd half), Reaction, 1st Pinch Point, Realization, and Midpoint (1st Half)

In the CHAOS-TRUTH realm, we have Midpoint (2nd half), Action, 2nd Pinch Point, Renewed Push, and 3rd Plot Point (1st half)

In the ORDER-TRUTH realm, we have 3rd Plot Point (second half), Climax Begins, Confrontation, Climactic Moment, and Resolution

Gonna be so real here, I think ORDER shouldn't actually start again until Climactic Moment, but I couldn't resist the allure of diving the page into neat little quarters. At least they're making a solid push toward order once we transition :)

NOTE: This is an argumentative essay, not a statement of fact. I wanted to double-check my opinions against the opinions of others and couldn't find anything, so here I am. Alone with my opinion. I had some trouble fitting Jurassic Park neatly onto the wheel due to the differences in genre, but I think I made it work. I mean, I wouldn't be publishing this if I didn't think I got it right.

—

HOOK: Crichton immediately breaks the first rule of my wheel by opening with a bunch of exposition about scientific research and discovery. This works anyway because genetics was a fashionable topic in that time period— mysterious and dangerous. Jurassic Park was published in 1990 and the first Pokémon Movie came out in '98. The idea of cloning and genetic manipulation had a hold on people.

We move on to a scene that sets up a mystery— what mysterious creature attacked the workman? Why is Ed Regis lying about it? Why did he steal the doctor's camera?

The mystery deepens as we follow a family on vacation. A child is attacked by a mysterious lizard. A partially-eaten lizard of the same variety is obtained and sent to the US (setting up the Setup/Inciting Event later on). What are these mysterious animals? What's going on?

Crichton also establishes a sense of urgency and the grotesque when he shows us a scene of a baby being eaten by these same mysterious lizards. The mystery is established and our disgust is aroused— What the Hell is going on?

SETUP: Drs Grant and Sattler are introduced, each in a characteristic moment that helps establish who they are and what role they will serve in the story. Dr. Grant is studying a velociraptor skeleton and Dr. Sattler is... also there. (Look, this isn't a feminist reading of Jurassic Park okay)

Other important characters (Dr. Malcolm, Donald Gennaro) are mentioned by name. John Hammond is introduced on the phone, also in a characteristic moment: stubbornly bitching about potential interference with his mysterious project

We also learn that a living dinosaur (or something convincingly resembling one) has been found in Costa Rica.

We are compelled to keep reading as we're handed more questions and no answers. Grant thinks of Hammond as an annoying distraction, but we as readers know that nothing is random. Hammond is in some way linked to this dinosaur.

INCITING EVENT: Hammond invited Grant and Sattler to visit Isla Nublar

Refusal of the Call: Grant doesn't want to go, as he believes this distraction this will keep him from his studies. Hammond entices him with the promise of funding a future dig.

SETUP CONTINUES: Gennaro is introduced at work, being reminded of his goals by his boss

We have now identified the major wants of 4 main characters:

Grant & Sattler — keep researching dinosaurs

Hammond — run his project without interference

Gennaro — run Hammond's project safely

We the readers are also presented with a map of Jurassic Park (not yet named). Hammond is properly introduced via flashback, illustrating his character. Dodgson is also introduced, along with his goal to steal dinosaur embryos.

Note: Dodgson plays an incredibly important role in the setup. He solves all pre-established mysteries, explaining that Hammond has successfully cloned dinosaurs. He also introduces a source of conflict, thus ensuring that the story is never without tension, and thus readers are never deprived of a reason to keep reading. Will Dodgson's plan succeed? Is he right?

SETUP CONTINUES: The introduction of Dodgson leads into the introduction of Nedry and the role he will play in the story. (Want: steal dinosaur embryos and make money)

Dr. Malcolm is also introduced. (Want: watch Chaos Theory play out in real tine)

TRANSITION: Grant, Sattler, Nedry, Malcolm, Gennaro, and Hammond arrive at Isla Nublar

Ed Regis, Tim, Lex, Dr Wu, Robert Muldoon, and John Arnold are introduced

The group takes a tour of the grounds

FIRST MAJOR PLOT POINT: The group (Grant, Sattler, Lex, Tim, Regis, Gennaro, and Malcolm) take the car tour of the actual park

The FMPP marks a transition from the familiar world (ORDER) into an unfamiliar world (CHAOS). Notably, this is the point where it becomes difficult or impossible for the protagonist(s)/main characters to extricate themselves from this world and return to normalcy. Interestingly, the phrase "we can't go back" is used multiple times by multiple characters on the tour, in reference to the track the electric cars are following. They literally can't go back.

Tim sees a loose velociraptor while traveling in the car.

Grant finds a velociraptor eggshell while Sattler and Dr Harding are investigating the sick stegosaurus.

This is relatively tame as far as FMPPs go— the plot wheel indicates that something much more severe and shocking should happen here. In fact, the idea of loose velociraptors should be pretty shocking and severe, but we the readers (as well the characters) still believe the LIE that Hammond (et al) have everything under control and all the problems so far will have easy fixes.

REACTION: Grant and Malcolm radio Control and ask them to count the dinosaurs; we learn that they have been breeding. Grant has an idea why, but the audience is left in the dark about this.

1ST PINCH POINT: The weather takes a turn, so the groups separate. Grant, Malcolm, Regis, Tim, and Lex leave; Sattler, Gennaro, and Harding stay.

The Antagonistic Force of Jurassic Park is chaos, nature, things no one could have predicted and things that no one can control. This takes many different forms: the weather, human error, dinosaur attacks, bad luck, etc. It's chaos. In this particular instance, the AF is the weather, and it doesn't seem all that threatening. But it sets off a chain of chaotic events that lead to disaster. This is a thriller novel, so it's the reader's ignorance that provides much of the tension.

Realization: Malcolm explains that, according to Chaos Theory, there may be more danger ahead. He also explains the concept of fractals.

In a way, Jurassic Park (the novel) mimics a fractal. At a macro level, it contains basic story elements (rising action, foreshadowing, climax, falling action). However, each scene is also that structure played out in miniatureJurasdic Park contains countless miniature models of itself.

At this point, everyone (except Malcolm) is deep within the LIE that everything will be fine. There may be some minor problems, but everything is under control. They can work it out. There's no real danger.

REALIZATION, CONT'D: Lex points out that velociraptors have made it onto a supply boat heading for the mainland, thus introducing a ticking clock. The storm interferes with radio connections and Nedry ties up all the phone lines, meaning Grant can't reach Control and ask them to stop the boat (which they couldn't do anyway).

MIDPOINT: Nedry cuts power to the park, which turns off all the electric fences of the dinosaur paddocks.

The t. rex escapes and attacks the cars.

Nedry leaves.

The Midpoint marks the transition from LIE to TRUTH. While the TRUTH, isn't wholly accepted yet, it's beginning to dawn on everyone that there's nothing simple or easy about this. However, they all still believe that the problem is fixable. (Accept for Malcolm. As the author's mouthpiece, Malcolm is afforded a level of genre-awareness that the other characters are not. Malcolm has lived within the TRUTH for the whole story and will remain there.)

This is best exemplified on a micro level: during the 1st half of the Midpoint, Muldoon doesn't believe the dinosaurs are a real threat despite the fences being down. However, he quickly learns how wrong he is when the t. rex attacks.

Note that the Midpoint does not represent a TOTAL accepting of the TRUTH. Everyone has accepted that there is imminent danger and that going back to normal will be more difficult than they'd planned, but everyone is still expecting things to go back to normal.

ACTION: Grant and the kids try to work out how to proceed after watching Regis die

Arnold decides to fix the power issue without Nedry

Muldoon and Gennaro start to search for survivors

2ND PINCH POINT: The t. rex attacks again. While Grant and the children are left unassailed this time, this is a reminder of the imminent danger they're in

Arnold resets the computer system. (Again, the readers' ignorance prevents us from knowing that is actually a bad thing. This is a result of the wheel-book genre mismatch)

RENEWED PUSH: (False victory march)

The power comes back on (seemingly) restoring everything to normal except the phone lines

Malcolm appears to be holding up okay despite his injuries

Muldoon and Harding begin tending to the park and the dinosaurs, repairing damage done by the storm, which has ended

Malcolm is expecting a Malcolm Effect, that is, for everything to suddenly descend into abrupt chaos.

The t. rex nearly kills Grant and the kids, but they escape and find themselves on a fast track back to the Lodge

Arnold finds Nedry's body, allowing Muldoon to retrieve the rocket launcher

Phones come back, doctor is called for Malcolm

Grant and the kids traverse the river and encounter dangers, which they overcome

Muldoon tranqs the t. rex; Muldoon and Arnold now believe that the final complications before order is restored is to return the t. rex to its paddock

3RD MAJOR PLOT POINT: Gennaro points out a low power warning on the computer and Arnold realizes that he was supposed to switch from auxiliary power to main power, and he never did

Power goes out again

Control realizes that the electric fences were never actually turned back on and that velociraptors have been loose in the park for at least 5 hours

Everything goes to shit

Arnold dies before he can get the generator running and get the power back on properly

Grant and the kids return to a wrecked Visitor's Center and total chaos

Velociraptors begin breaking into the Lodge with the express goal of killing everyone inside

Grant only has 30 minutes until the boat reaches the mainland

Now all characters (except Hammond, who never stops believing the LIE) accept the TRUTH— there is no return to normal. They are in an extremely complicated, serious survival situation.

RECOVERY: Note: Jurassic Park is a fast-paced thriller. As such, it skips the "dark night of the soul'" a moment of angst which often occurs after the 3rd Major Plot Point. The closest we get to it is a slower moment where a delirious Malcolm watches velociraptors slowly breach his room, and waxes philosophical about scientific progress

Grant works to get the power and the computers back on

Ellie distracts some of the velociraptors to facilitate this

Lex and Tim escape a raptor attack and make their way through the Visitor's Center

Wu is killed

CMIMAX BEGINS/CONFRONTATION: Grant, Gennaro, Lex, and Tim reach the control room, but they must get past the remaining velociraptors before they can get to work

13 minutes before the ship reaches the mainland. Raptors closing in.

Grant kills them and joins Gennaro and the kids at the computers

CLIMACTIC MOMENT: Tim and Gennaro get the main power back on, stopping the final remaining raptors from breaking into the Lodge— but they still need to stop the boat

Tim reaches the boat and Gennaro convinces the captain to return to Isla Nublar immediately

RESOLUTION: Grant, Sattler, Gennaro, and Muldoon investigate a raptor nest. This is their last chance to learn anything more about dinosaurs before the island is destroyed

Isla Nublar is firebombed and all the dinosaurs are killed

Hammond and Malcolm die

FINAL IMAGE: All survivors are safe in Costa Rica, but unable to return home. We learn that strange lizards have been spotted in the jungles of Costa Rica...

(This leaves us as readers uneasy and concerned)

[legends-of-time]

Thorn Bush (Doctor Who Story)

Chapter 28: The Snowmen Part Two

Masterlist

They run down the stairs, into the entrance hall with the children ahead and Kathy, the Doctor and Clara bringing up the rear.

Captain Latimer, having heard the commotion as well as footsteps coming down the stairs, enters the hall to get to the bottom of it. "Children, what is the expla—" he then notices the extra guests beside his governess, "who the devil are you? What are you doing in my house?" He splutters.

Uh...

Unfortunately, the Doctor has an answer, "It's okay. We are your governess' gentleman and lady friends, and we've just been upstairs having fun!"

Kathy stares at the Doctor wide eyed. Does he not know how that sounds?! She glances over at Clara who's blushing.

Thankfully Alice the maid interrupts. "Captain Latimer. In the garden, there's snowmen! And they're just growing out of nowhere, all by themselves. Look!" Alice runs to answer the front door.

She's confronted by Vastra and Jenny. The former smiles greetingly and says, "Good evening. I'm a Lizard Woman from the Dawn of Time, and this is my wife."

Kathy tries not to laugh as Alice runs back inside, screaming, and back into—

"This dwelling is under attack. Remain calm, human scum." Strax declares.

Alice screams and faints.

"Oh, dear." Kathy sighs as she walks down the stairs and looks over at the maid. Once seeing the woman is fine, she looks back at her friends. "You lot could have handled that a little more delicately you know."

"Not our fault some cannot handle excitement." Vastra says in humour as she and her wife step into the house, shutting the door behind them tightly.

Kathy rolls her eyes in humour but grins all the same.

"So, any questions?" The Doctor casually asks the shaken Captain Latimer.

The man ignores him and turns to Clara. "You have a gentleman and, uh, lady friends?"

The Doctor shrugs and turns to the situation at hand. "Vastra, what's happening?" He darts over to a window, looking out. Kathy smiles slightly at the sight of him getting back into the swing of it.

"The snow is highly localised, and on this occasion not naturally occurring." Vastra replies.

"It's coming out of that cab parked by the gates." Jenny adds.

"Sir, one pulver grenade would blow these snowmen to smithereens." Strax says.

Kathy groans, rubbing her forehead. "Strax, I've told you! They're already smithereens." She turns to the governess, gesturing to the Silurian, Sontaran and Human. "See, Clara? Our friends again."

"Clara? Who's Clara?" Captain Latimer questions doubtfully.

"Your current governess is in reality a former barmaid called Clara." The Doctor explains.

"That's the way to do it!" They all spin around to see the Ice Governess making its way to the top of the stairs.

"Meanwhile your previous governess is now a living ice sculpture impersonating Mister Punch." The Doctor continues. "Jenny, what have you got?"

Jenny acts fast, throwing a portable force field generator (a little ball-like device that glows red) onto the stairs. The force field comes up, trapping the Ice Governess on the stairs. Though this is only a temporary fix as the energy field can only last so long. "That should hold it."

"Sir, this room. One observational window on the line of attack and one defendable entrance." Strax tells them.

"Right, everyone in there. Now. Move it." The Doctor urges.

——

Kathy leads Clara, the children, the recently awakened maid (who is a stuttering mess upon waking) and Captain Latimer away from the hall. Jenny escorts the group as well, holding a katana at her side, ready for a fight. Strax is already in the room, prepared to defend against an attack. They place themselves into a small, study room. Captain Latimer immediately starts downing drinks. The Doctor and Vastra arrive shortly after, locking the door securely behind them.

"Strax, how long have we got?" The Doctor questions.

"They're not going to attack. They made no attempt to conceal their arrival. An attack force would never abandon surprise so easily, and they're clearly in a defence formation." Strax reports.

"Way, aye, aye. Well done, Straxie. Still got it, buddy." The Doctor cries gleefully, noogies him and kisses the Sontaran on the top of the head but immediately regrets it as he pulls a face.

"Sir, please do not noogie me during combat prep." Strax complains.

"So, there's something here they want." Vastra realises.

"The ice woman." Clara says.

"Precisely." Kathy says, nodding in return at Clara. "A mix between their ice and human DNA. Replicate that and they'll have an army of ice warriors that don't ever melt."

"Exactly." The Doctor agrees, he walks over and hands Captain Latimer the drink of whiskey. The Captain seems to need it. The Doctor then looks at himself in the mirror, adjusting his bow tie with a grin. "To live here, the snow needs to evolve and she's the blueprint. She's what they need to become." He turns back around towards the group, rambling on, "When the snow melted last night, did the pond?" He snaps his fingers, pointing at Clara.

"No," replies the governess.

"Living ice. It will never melt." The Doctor says grimly.

"And we can't let them get a hold of her." Kathy adds, standing beside him as they both addressed the room. "They'll take over the whole planet if they do."

"And it will be the last day of humanity on this planet." The Doctor concludes.

At that moment, the front door rings. The expression on the Doctor's face darkens. He cracks his neck to the side briefly before turning to the door.

"Stay here." He grabs Kathy's hand and then promptly slams the door behind them, leaving them all in the study room.

——

No sooner had they left, than Clara steps out of the room.

"Oi, we told you to stay in there." The Doctor admonishes.

"Oh, I didn't listen." Clara shrugs.

Kathy knows now it's too late; she's become attached. "Please Clara, stay in there where it's safe."

"No."

Kathy groans in frustration. "Why don't you listen to me?!" She exclaims.

"It's why you like me." Clara retorts.

Kathy blinks at her. Wait what? "Who said I like you?"

Suddenly, Clara grabs Kathy's face and gives her a long kiss before separating from her. Both are blushing and breathing heavily though the latter is likely because of shock rather than being out of breath.

"I think you just did." Clara says.

Kathy gawps at her. "Right..."

"If you two have finished." The Doctor interrupts causing Kathy to jump as she'd forgotten he is there. He turns and opens the front door, with Kathy and Clara scuttling after him, to reveal Simeon.

"Release her to us. You have five minutes." Simeon turns away and the Doctor closes the door.

"We need to get her out of here but keep her away from them." The Doctor says.

"How?" Clara questions.

The Doctor takes an umbrella from the stand. "With this. Do I always have to state the obvious?"

"Obviously." Kathy remarks with a grin. The Doctor rolls his eyes while Clara giggles.

Captain Latimer has stepped outside the study. "Those creatures outside, what are they?"

"No danger to you, as long as we get that thing out of here," Kathy reassures him. She hates this plan but doesn't know how else to stop the Ice Governess and there's the original Clara they have to think about in the modern day.

The Doctor goes up the stairs and sonics the forcefield.

"What are you doing?" Clara asks as she pushes past Kathy, who tries to stop her as she walks up behind him.

"Between the three of us, I can't wait to find out." The forcefield turns off and then reforms behind them. "Right, Clara, if you look after everyone here, then we can—" he realises then realises Clara is on their side of the force field. "Clara!"

"Doctor." Clara retorts.

They duck under the Governesses' arms as she reaches them, lunging, and run up the stairs.

"That was stupid." The Doctor counters petulantly.

"You were stupid, too." Clara retorts.

"I'm allowed. I'm good at stupid." The Doctor retorts back.

"Glad we've established that cause I've thinking that for ages!" Kathy remarks as she hurries up the stairs in front of them.

"Oi!"

"That's the way to do it!" The Ice Governess mimics.

"Why does she keep saying that?" Clara asks as they all get to the top of the stairs and turn to the creature.

"Random mirroring." Kathy explains. "We need to get on the roof."

"This way!" Clara grabs Kathy's hand, who in turn grabs the Doctor's, and pulls them towards the roof.

"No, I do the hand grabbing. That's my job. That's always me!" The Doctor cries as he gets dragged along.

——

The Doctor steps through the window leading to the roof. Clara tries climbing through next, but her bustle gets stuck halfway through. Kathy shoves the girl through, in a hurry to follow as the Ice Governess is only a few steps away now. She tries getting herself through the window, though suffers the same fate as Clara.

The Doctor and Clara both reach for Kathy's hands, yanking her through. It ends up flinging Kathy through the window as the two lose their footing on the slippery rooftop. The Doctor and Clara land on their backs with Kathy right on top of them.

"You're going to have to take those clothes off." The Doctor then says. Kathy lets out a gasp of alarm at that and the Doctor realises what his statement had implied. "I didn't mean."

"I know. I understand, I do." Kathy quickly reassures him.

"Good."

"Now, what's the plan?" Clara asks.

The Doctor turns his head to look at her. "Who said I've got a plan?"

"Course you've got a plan. You took that." She points to the umbrella.

"Maybe I'm an idiot." The Doctor says as they all pull themselves up.

"You're not. You're clever. Really clever." Clara corrects.

"I'd argue against that sometimes." Kathy says.

"Are you here just to take cheap shots?" The Doctor asks grumpily.

Kathy shrugs. "Someone has to put you down."

The Doctor rolls his eyes and throws Clara the umbrella. "If I've got a plan, what is it? You tell me."

"That's the way to do it!" The Ice Governess reaches the window. Kathy tries to ignore the clenching in her stomach.

"Is this a test?" Clara asks.

"Yes."

"What will it do to us?"

"Hopefully stop that." Kathy says as the Ice Governess turns to snow to get through the window.

"So, come on then. Plan. Do we have one?" The Doctor asks.

"Oh, I know what your plan is. I knew straight away." Clara says, throwing the umbrella back to the Doctor.

"No, you didn't." He chucks it back.

"Course she did." Kathy says, giving Clara a grin and receiving one back.

"Show me." The Doctor demands.

"Why should I?" Clara asks.

"Because we'll be dead in under thirty seconds. Do I have a plan?"

Clara begins pacing around them, thinking aloud, "If we'd been escaping, we'd be climbing down the building. If we'd been hiding, we'd be on the other side of the roof. But no, we're standing right here."

"So?" Kathy smirks.

Clara throws one back. "So!" reaches up with the umbrella and pulls the ladder down. The Ice Governess is reforming on the roof.

"Oh, she's good." The Doctor whispers, grinning at Kathy. "You know how to pick them."

"Do I?" Kathy asks. She's really only been around a couple of the companion meetings so far. She then nods to the ladder. "You first."

"No, after you two." The Doctor counters, waving a hand to the ladder.

"After you." Clara scoffs.

"Remember. Dresses." Kathy says, supporting her and Clara's point by grabbing her skirt and making it bounce.

"Right. Of course." The Doctor mumbles, embarrassed. He starts up the ladder quickly.

Kathy and Clara are just behind him, following along the best they can given what they are wearing.

——

The Doctor helps them onto the staircase before making the ladder come back up. Just in time as the Ice Governess below is about to grab on.

"So, you can move your cloud? You can control it?" Clara asks as they make their way up the spiralling staircase.

"No. No one can control clouds. That would be silly." The Doctor scoffs. "The wind, a little bit."

Clara keeps up with the questions as she, Kathy and the Doctor continue up the staircase. At one point they hear the Ice Governess coming up the staircase as well. Once they are up on the cloud, the Doctor turns and makes it so it will make the Ice Governess trapped right under the super dense vapour cloud.

"Do you actually live up here on a cloud, in a box?" Clara questions them.

"He does." Kathy corrects. "I just pop up for chats. He mostly stays by himself."

Clara raises an eyebrow at the Doctor. "Blimey, you really know how to sulk, don't you?"

"I'm not sulking." The Doctor argues.

"You live in a box!"

"That's no more a box than you are a governess." The Doctor retorts.

"Oh, spoken like a man." Clara scoffs. "You know, you're the same as all the rest." Clara begins to follow them as they unlock and enter the TARDIS. "Sweet little Clara, works at the Rose And Crown, ideas above her station. Well, for your information, I'm not sweet on the inside, and I'm certainly not—"

The Doctor turns on the TARDIS light, eliminating the alterations and the size of the console room in comparison to the outside.

"—little." Clara finishes, gaping.

"It's called the TARDIS. It can travel anywhere in time and space. And it's mine." The Doctor smugly explains.

"But it's. Look at it, it's..." Clara splutters. Okay, Kathy gets why the Doctor enjoys showing people the TARDIS.

"Go on, say it. Most people do."

Clara runs outside, doing the traditional circuit of the outside. Kathy smiles slightly. The only time she's seen a companion see the inside of the TARDIS for the first time was the original Clara. This thought causes Kathy's smile to drop as Clara re-enters.

"It's smaller on the outside."

The Doctor's smug smile drops. "Okay, that is a first."

"Is it magic? Is it a machine?" Clara questions excitedly.

"She's a spaceship." Kathy explains gently. "She's alive and aware as you and I. Say 'hello'!" The controls blink and the ship hums lightly. Though there was not much of a welcome from the ship, Kathy knows why the TARDIS always feels wary of Clara. It is because of the whole paradox behind the girl and the echoes of the girl that follow. Plus, there had always been a conflict of personality between the two from the very beginning.

"Hello." Clara breathes, waving in awe. The young governess shakes her head, laughing as though she feels like she is losing her mind. "I'm speaking with a machine. The machine's a 'she'." She then looks at Kathy and the Doctor in pure excitement and elation. "Is it always like this with you two?"

"Always." The Doctor says with a grin. Kathy does as well though it drops once the other two are not looking.

"Is there a kitchen?" Clara asks then.

"Another first."

"I don't know why I asked that. It's just, I like making soufflés." Clara remarks as she walks towards the door.

Kathy quickly follows, standing next to her. This Clara can't travel with the Doctor but maybe she can still save her.

Clara's statement causes the Doctor to pause. "Soufflés?"

Clara turns to him as he walks over to them by the doors, staring at him thoughtfully before asking, "Why are you showing me all this? You're nearly a foot taller than I am. You could have reached the ladder without this." She holds up the umbrella. "You didn't take this for Kathy cause you could've just gotten the ladder down for her. You took it for me, to test me. Why?" She tosses him back the umbrella and he catches it with ease.

"I never know why. I only know who." The Doctor holds up a key and then puts it in Clara's hand.

"What's this?" Clara asks.

Suddenly, Kathy feels herself being yanked backwards. Clara and the Doctor cry out. The silver key falls with a clang to the floor as the governess drops it as she lunges towards Kathy, who's being pulled to the still open doorway of the ship. Why didn't Kathy think of closing this? But it's okay cause while this is terrifying, she can survive this, it'll be alright.

Clara and the Doctor run after her. Kathy screams in terror as the Ice Governess snarls and pulls her back to the edge of the cloud.

The Time Lord yanks out his sonic screwdriver, aiming it aggressively at the ice creature. "Let her go. Let her go now! Now!" He shouts.

Clara jumps forward and is able to grab Kathy's hand just as she tumbles backwards off the cloud along with the Ice Governess. Hands connected and Kathy watches in horror as Clara begins to also tumble over the edge and begin to plummet to the ground below, along with Kathy and the Ice Governess.

——

Kathy's breath is sucked out of her as she impacts the ground. She opens her eyes slowly and sees the TARDIS materialising around her. She blinks away the last of the snowflakes as she stares at the time rotor in a daze.

"Kathy! Kathy!" The Doctor's face appears above her.

"Doctor.... Clara..." She struggles to be able to see where the young girl is.

"Don't worry, I'll get her help but you need to focus on yourself." The Doctor reassures.

Kathy frowns before she realises there's a familiar warmth spreading across her hands. She looks down to see them glowing orange. Ah, this again. She knew this would be survival but would trigger the need to use the regeneration energy. That's why she let herself be bait for the Ice Governess.

"I need to take Clara inside so she gets help. You stay here and take your time." The Doctor says before disappearing.

——

Since Kathy doesn't actually need to change to survive death, it's more of a healing process. She feels herself coming together, fixing all the broken bones and punctured organs. She feels the energy flow over her as the TARDIS emanates soothing sounds.

Once it's over, Kathy opens her eyes again and hears the TARDIS make a welcoming noise. Kathy groans as she sits up as her body is still tired. She then remembers what happened and begins sobbing.

"Kathy?" She looks up to see the Doctor approaching her sombrely.

"This is all my fault. Sh-she can't die like this. She can't." Kathy sobs.

The Doctor crouches down slowly, placing his hands on Kathy's shoulders. It brings no comfort to her. "You didn't know she'd also go down."

"But I knew she was meant to but I stupidly thought I could stop her falling." Kathy says, sniffling as she stares at the floor.

"She will live, I promise." The Doctor declares, squeezing her shoulders.

Kathy huffs a watery laugh. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

"You've done so much for me, Katherine." His serious tone causes Kathy to look at him. "Let me help. I'll do everything I can." He promises her.

"I need to see her first." Kathy says.

"Of course."

——

Vastra steps inside the TARDIS where the Doctor stays while Kathy goes to Clara. She had left him to scan the ice fragments that had used to be the Ice Governess.

Clara is lying on a table while Strax uses a device as he stands over her, keeping her alive for a while longer. The TARDIS is parked in the corner of the room. Kathy walks over to the young girl causing Strax to step aside. She can see the sombre looks of Captain Latimer, Jenny, the children and Alice watching on.

Clara weakly opens her eyes and smiles softly at the sight of her. "You're okay."

Kathy smiles tearfully, she reaches out her hand and strokes Clara's face softly. "Of course, I'm okay. You're a little worse for wear however."

"Sorry." Clara apologises.

"Don't be." Kathy insists. "You were trying to save me just like you always do."

"The Doctor says I'm not going to die. But you know the opposite, don't you?" Clara says pointedly despite how weak she is.

Kathy nods, tears threatening to spill. "Yes, I'm sorry, Clara. I should've done more."

Clara shakes her head slightly. "It's not your fault. Though, one thing though, before you go."

"What?"

"Ever since we met, I've had the feeling that you already knew me, you acted so familiar towards me. Why?"

"I have met you. Multiple times in fact." Kathy admits.

"How?"

"In another life."

"Do we save worlds?"

"Yes, we will, and will probably save many more." Kathy replies. "But first, let's save this one." She leans forward and kisses Clara on her forehead before departing from the room.

——

Kathy goes back inside the TARDIS and catches Vastra and the Doctor mid-conversation as they stand by the console.

"I don't think the universe makes bargains." Vastra tells him.

"It was my fault." The Doctor says.

"No," Kathy interrupts, "it was mine." She walks over to them.

The Doctor shakes his head. "No, I should've realised when you told her to go back into the study. You usually never truly stop them. That should've been a clue."

"Well then." Vastra interrupts. "Better save the world."

——

Kathy had been thinking on the way over to the institute and as she, the Doctor and Vastra wait for Simeon to arrive. She knows the simplest course of action would be to stop Simeon from being bitten by the memory worm and the Intelligence won't learn to survive beyond physical form but if she does that, it will change too much. It will mean the original Clara and the Doctor don't meet, they then won't be led to Trenzalore by the Intelligence and Clara won't jump and create multiple versions of herself to save the Doctor, leading them here, nor will she be there to help Kathy change the Doctor's mind about destroying Gallifrey. Bar making sure the Doctor doesn't get frozen by Simeon's possessed body, Kathy needs to let it all play out just as it did.

Simeon enters. "You promised us something. Have you brought it?"

"Big fella here's been very quiet while you've been out. Which is only to be expected, considering who he really is. Do you know what this is, big fella?" The Doctor holds up the lunch box.

"I do not understand these markings." The Globe speaks, snow flying around inside and electricity sparking around it.

"A map of the London Underground, 1967. Key strategic weakness in metropolitan living, if you ask me, but then I have never liked a tunnel." The Doctor explains. This almost makes Kathy laugh. She wonders if the Doctor had been intentional with his words, probably not as he doesn't realise his past history with the Intelligence yet.

"Enough of this." The Globe retorts. "We are powerful, but on this planet, we are limited. We need to learn to take human form." The Doctor uses the sonic screwdriver, and the Snowman's voice rises in pitch. "The Governess is our most perfect replication of humanity."

"What's happening to its voice?" Vastra questions.

"He's just stripping away the disguise." Kathy explains.

"No, stop! Stop that. Cease, I command you." The Globe demands, but its words are less impactful now it's accompanied by a child's voice.

"It sounds like a child." Vastra realises.

"Of course, it sounds like a child. It is a child. Simeon as a child. The snow has no voice without him." The Doctor explains. Simeon leans on his desk, shaken.

"Don't listen to him, he's ruining everything." The Globe declares.

"How long has the Intelligence been talking to you, Simeon? Since you were a boy building snowmen?" Kathy questions knowingly.

"Yes. He was my snowman. He spoke to me." Simeon replies shakily.

"But the snow doesn't talk, does it?" The Doctor retorts. "It's just a mirror. It just reflects back everything we think and feel and fear. You poured your darkest dreams into a snowman and look, look what it became."

"I don't understand." Vastra speaks.

"It's a parasite feeding on the loneliness of a child and the sickness of an old man." Kathy explains.

"We can go on and do everything we planned." The Globe insists.

"Oh yes, and what a plan. A world full of living ice people. Oh, dear me, how very Victorian of you." The Doctor sarcastically replies.

Simeon pulls himself together at those words. "What's wrong with Victorian values?" He says and grabs the lunch box, opening it.

"Ah, ah, ah. Are you sure?"

"I have always been sure." The memory worm in the box bites him, causing him to convulse and collapse. Kathy watches on sorrowfully, thinking of all that lost potential as well as a life about to be lost.

"Good. I'm glad you think so," the Doctor crouches, talking to the unmoving Simeon, "since your entire adult life is about to be erased. No parasite without a host. Without you, it will have no voice. Without the governess, it will have no form."

Kathy slowly backs away, knowing she needs to keep away so Simeon won't knock her down when he's animated. She reaches for what seems to be some sort of cane and grabs it, ready.

"What, what, what's happening? What's happening? What did you do?" The Globe panics.

"You've got nothing left to mirror any more. Goodbye."

"What did you, did you..." the snow suddenly fills the Globe and its voice deepens again. "Did you really think it would be so easy?"

"That's not possible. How is that possible? Kathy?" The Doctor turns to her.

Kathy shakes her head apologetically. "I'm sorry. It had to happen. Too many important things won't happen if I had stopped you."

"But you were just Doctor Simeon. You're not real. He dreamed you. How can you still exist?"

"Now the dream outlives the dreamer and can never die. Once I was the puppet," Simeon is reanimated as an icy ghoul, "now I pull the strings! I tried so long to take on human form. By erasing Simeon, you made space for me. I fill him now." It speaks from Simeon's body.

"Hint, don't let him touch you!" Kathy cries.

Vastra draws her sword but Simeon knocks her aside with unexpected, for Vastra and the Doctor anyway, strength but, before it can grab the Doctor, Kathy raises the cane and whacks Simeon on the back of his head. This startles the Intelligence and Simeon's body staggers.

"You think that will stop me." The Intelligence cries. "I am more than snow, more than Simeon. Even this old body is strong in my control. Winter is coming!"

Kathy smirks. "Oh, I know, but even alien snow gets washed away."

It's at that moment that the Globe full of snow suddenly becomes full of water. Simeon's body cries in shock before collapsing and seizing on the ground.

"Doctor, the Globe. It's turning to rain. All of it, the snow, look." Vastra observes as Simeon's body becomes still.

Kathy crouches over Simeon's body. "He's dead." She says sombrely.

"What happened?" Vastra asks as she pulls herself up.

"The snow mirrors, that's all it does. It's mirroring something else now. Something so strong, it's drowning everything else." The Doctor realises. He opens a window and holds out his hand. "There was a critical mass of snow at the house. If, if something happened there..."

The Doctor and Vastra both taste the rain.

"It's salty. Saltwater rain." Vastra observers.

"Exactly," Kathy says remorsefully, "because it's tears, not rain. A family is crying on Christmas Eve. That can drown out any snow."

——

The TARDIS materialises in the study. Kathy, the Doctor and Vastra step out to find everyone else weeping or standing silently around Clara as she lies on the table, breathing shallowly.

"I'm sorry." Strax says. "There was nothing to be done. She has moments only."

The Doctor and Kathy walk over to Clara, crouching beside her. The girl watches them through lidded eyes.

"We saved the world, Clara," Kathy says softly, "you, me and the Doctor. I told you we would."

"Are you going back to your cloud, Doctor?" Clara asks quietly.

The Doctor shakes his head. "No more cloud. Not now."

"Why not?" She then closes her eyes, unable to hold them open any longer.

"It rained." The Doctor then bows his head mournfully but Kathy watches on, waiting.

"Run. Run, you clever boy." Clara opens her eyes as she finishes speaking. "Remember. And keep her safe." The clock chimes midnight as Clara dies.

Kathy stares at Clara with tearful eyes as everyone begins to weep around her. Again, those words, that alteration in the statement.

"It's Christmas. Christmas Day." Jenny murmurs.

——

Captain Latimer is with his children by the graveside while Kathy, the Doctor, Vastra and Jenny stand back.

"And what about the Intelligence? Melted with the snow?" Vastra questions.

Kathy shakes her head, her eyes still red from the tears. While the Clara she knows is still alive, she had gotten to know this version and is still hurt by her death. "No. It learned to survive beyond physical form."

"Well, we can't be in much danger from a disembodied Intelligence that thinks it can invade the world with snowmen." Jenny remarks.

"Or that the London Underground is a key strategic weakness." Vastra adds. The statement lifts a smile from Kathy.

The Doctor takes out Simeon's business card, frowning at it. "The Great Intelligence. Rings a bell. The Great Intelligence." He walks forward to the grave as the family leave with the rest of them following.

The gravestone has already been carved and put in place. Clara Oswin Oswald. Remember me, we shall meet again. Born November 23, 1866, died December 24, 1892.

Kathy watches closely as the Doctor takes in Clara's full name as he crouches by the grave, knowing what this will trigger.

"I never knew her name. Her full name. Soufflé girl. Oswin. It was her. It was soufflé girl again." He says to himself before leaping up and facing Kathy, Vastra and Jenny. "I never saw her face the first time with the Daleks, but her voice, it was the same voice."

"Doctor?" Jenny asks.

"The same woman, twice. And she died both times. The same woman! Kathy, do I find her?"

Kathy looks away from the gravestone to the Doctor with a tired, sad smile. "Spoilers, but I do recall you recruiting a younger me to help."

He beams. "Ah ha! Brilliant!"

"Doctor, please, what are you talking about?" Vastra questions.

"Something's going on. Something impossible, something." He says gleefully. "Right, you three, stay here. Stay right here. Don't move an inch." He backs away before running off.

"Are you coming back?" Vastra calls after him.

"Shouldn't think so!"

"But where's he going?" Vastra questions.

Kathy shrugs, smirking at the two. "What do you think? To find her. To find Clara."

——

A/N: Poor Kathy. She was really hoping to save this Clara, but she still hasn't learnt not everything can be changed, no matter what she hopes. While she is old and mature, she's still naive when it comes to events from DW episodes. She does have small successes (Spider in Thin Ice) but is not always successful with the bigger ones as they have a greater effect on the timelines. Spoiler for you there.

Please leave comments on how you're enjoying this story and what you think.

[paulagnewart]

Sonic the Oz-Hog Act 1/12: Never Forget Your Firsts!

Sonic Super Special issue 3 AU Publication Date: 14th January 1998 Price: $3.95

It's January 1998. The Rural Fires Act had come into effect just in time, for the nation's traditional summer of sports were only superseded by its traditional summer of bushfires. Both east and west coasts had taken a hammering through a combination of record breaking heatwaves and arsonists, leading to at least four preventable deaths. Residents praying for rain got more than they bargained for within days when fires gave way to weeks of floods and cyclones.

Any kids looking to escape the ravaging weather would be disappointed; 1998 was the first summer in nearly 20 years of waking up to a host-less morning show. After one complaint from moral guardians too many, beloved wisecracking puppet Agro was booted from his own program, with Channel Seven instead offering repeats of Gargoyles, The Jetsons and All Dogs Go to Heaven. The lack of Agro meant Channel Ten's rival program Cheez TV had little to worry about, and it showed with their own January lineup of Transformers Generation Two, Spider-Man and The Tick repeats.

Having vowed to never introduce a 10% tax on all goods and services under their watch, John Howard’s conservative Government prepared to backflip on their election promise. A move destined to make teen wallets even lighter when buying CD singles of that month's chart-topping song, Aqua's Doctor Jones. Personally the already high price of CDs was of little concern back then, instead more worried about accidentally sleeping in Saturday mornings and miss another installment of The Dinky-Di's quest to stop Earth's number-one eco enemy Mephisto. Sadly if ratings were any indication, I was the only one waking up early enough to watch anyway.

Names including “Beetleborgs”, “Extreme Dinosaurs”, “Venus DeMilo” and “Pokemon” were unheard of, though would certainly go on to pester parents by year's end. SEGA World Sydney, Australia's largest indoor theme park and last refuge for everyone's favourite rodent, was crawling towards its first anniversary. Two new final volumes of Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog, a series which hadn't aired on TV in years by that point, trundled onto VHS with all the invigoration of an afterthought. In short the high-speed hedgehog's classic heyday was coming to an end.

Yet things weren't all doom and gloom. For fans still yearning that new hedgey action, Archie Sonic continued to thrive among the mass of imported titles jostling for pole position on newsagent shelves. Quantities were plentiful and demand remained strong, even through a whole dollar price increase by year's end.

As the title boasts, life is built on firsts. Those unforgettable turning points destined to remain etched within our minds. Be them first kiss, first job, first concert or even first Star Wars action figure. When we grow old, the urge swells to reflect or even revisit those small, beautiful starting points. It's a feeling Archie certainly shared, with their appropriately first comic to reach Aussie shores that year: Sonic Firsts.

For a publisher who spent decades following the Mad Magazine bread-and-butter approach of constantly publishing past material, it’s surprising Archie took so long adding their best-selling title to the reprint rotisserie. Within its fancy 48 pages, Sonic Firsts offered a quartet of classic adventures invaluable to new readers while attempting to smooth out what eventually became continuity snares. Michael Gallagher and Scott Shaw! kicked things off with the eponymous Don't Cry For Me, Mobius, a fine starting point for the comic if ever there was one. Rabbot Deployment saw Shaw! superseded by Dave Manak and the introduction of Bunnie, who was granted something of a backstory when such things for anyone outside Sonic and Sally was rare. The pair returned for their flatulence flaunting The Lizard of Odd, an otherwise standard tale if not for Super Sonic's debut. Mike Kanterovich and Ken Penders brought it home with This Island Hedgehog, a straightforward misadventure which nobody could've guessed at the time just how important (or bloated, take your pick) a certain Rad Red's life story would become.

For some newsagents the switch to Sonic Super Special's permanently numbered quarterly format proved difficult to grasp. This issue was often solicited by retailers as Brave New World, raising more than a few eyebrows on parents who already forked out for that edition. It was unusual but ultimately humourous in hindsight when years later, the first eight issues of Sonic Universe were billed as Sonic X. But more on that another time.

The Special was a success for Archie. It showed there was a market for reprints among Sonic fans, even if it took several more years to truly milk its potential. Fans could fork out the standard price for their 48 page floppy, or if feeling a little more extravagant, shell out double the price for a comic book shop exclusive 'perfect-bound' edition. Touted by Archie as "Sonic's first ever Trade Paperback", the simultaneously released special boasted heavier cover stock and a minimally-formatted introduction by former editor/writer Paul Castiglia. If that wasn't enough, both versions were later reissued (either 1:1 perfect reprints or just unmoving warehouse stock, you be the judge.) to comic shops among a slew of 'back catalogue' miniseries and specials around late 2004. Marvellous.

In all, Sonic Firsts was a nifty if unintended celebration just in time and right on the mark for Archie Sonic’s 5th anniversary. The future was bright and the only way was up. Juuuuuust pay no heed to one of the Special's writers banging on about reprint royalties when this issue was announced. They certainly did. :P

Next Time: Take a flier to the comic's future as everyone's favourite embattled Echidna faces a deeply personal dilemma. A true clash for the ages which left both fans and editor reeling from its outcome. Will things ever be the same again? Will this description quit with the cheesy song references? Unlikely.

< Previous \ Index / Next >

[blueboxphenomenon]

The Doctor in Myths & Historical Impossibilities

Alongside various other mysteries, the book Myths & Historical Impossibilities collates quite a few accounts of the mysterious Doctor figure.

There are tales of a medic involving himself in the works of Shakespeare, a lewd encounter with a painter in the court of King Charles II, and a botched escape from a German POW camp.

The introductory passage to the chapters relating to the Doctor:

"THE UNNAMED DOCTOR" One of the most intriguing and compelling of all the documented historical impossibilities I have come across in my studies so far is what I like to call "The Strange Case of the Unnamed Doctor." Nearly a dozen incidents of this mysterious man cropping up in wildly varying locations and periods of our history makes this one of the most mysterious cases herein. Some have called him the "Bow-Tied Boy," others the "Time Drifter," but whoever he was, or is, he certainly seems to get around…

This passage gives us a few other names by which the "doctor" is known. These seem to be tied to a specific version of the doctor.

Excerpt referring to the casting of a British movie:

As was often the case with the speedy turnaround of the famous Carry On comedy films, publicity pictures were sometimes taken before the cameras even started rolling. Though the actor pictured here (identified as 'John Smith' on the back of the photograph) did not end up playing the role of the Khasi of Kalabar in Peter Rogers' 1968 camp classic Up The Khyber- the role eventually being filled by veteran Carry On star Kenneth Williams - he clearly got as far as a costume fitting. In an entry from 12 March 1968 in Kenneth Williams's diary, Smith is referred to briefly. "Costume's far too big," complains Williams. "Daft idiots offering the role to Smith. Who's heard of him anyway? Should never have turned it down in first place… Met JS briefly yesterday at Pinewood. Nice looking chap. Checked for him later in Spotlight directory - no trace!" No other clues remain as to why or how this 'John Smith' was hired or fired from the movie.

"John Smith" is another name - believed to be an alias - often associated with the doctor, particularly one "Dr. John Smith" who is counted amongst UNIT staff who many believe to be the original "Doctor". What was he doing auditioning for a role in a 'Carry On...' film?

Excerpt regarding a mass prison break during the second world war:

Six months later, every allied prisoner escaped from Stalag Luft 14 in a single night - during an anachronistic stage production of the musical 'La Cage aux Folles', a musical which had yet to be written. Even the Germans were taking part in the performance, and by the time the Schutzstaffel arrived, the commandant was caught in the middle of performing a solo of 'I Am What I Am.'

While comical, if true, this would add weight to the prevailing theory that the doctor is a time-traveller. In this case, he saves prisoners of war but also seems to have damaged the continuity of the timelines.

Excerpt detailing an appearance in the Bayeux Tapestry:

The Bayeux Tapestry - though, of course, not actually a tapestry - has fascinated scientists, historians and the public alike for centuries. Of all the images depicted in this fascinating commemoration of the events surrounding the Norman Conquest, none is more difficult to comprehend than the seemingly anachronistic figure in the bow tie pointing towards what is now widely thought to be Halley's Comet. Could he be our Unnamed Doctor? And what of the strange words 'Cooee pond"? Certainly not Latin. A joke by the nuns who embroidered this masterpiece, perhaps? We may never know.

This is one of many strange anomalies that can be found within the Bayeux Tapestry, including lizard people and a blue box. The image matches well with one of the reported "doctors," of whom there seem to be many.

Appearance of what is possibly the Doctor in an extended nursery rhyme:

This I stumbled across in an 1819 book entitled Mrs Molbury's Collected Rhymes Both Ancient and Modern. Though the first verse is the same as those usually found in texts of this period, the rest of the tale is very different indeed. What could a 'Sontaran' be? Considering a 'humpty-dumpty' is supposedly a 17th-century beverage of boiled brandy and ale, might this Sontaran too have been an ancient cocktail of some kind? And could the 'Fool' in question be the Unnamed Doctor?: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. All the King's Horses and all the King's Men Couldn't put Humpty together again. But then came a cry, 'twas from the King's Fool: Opining that bow ties look fashionably cool. He stepped from a blue box and said with a grin: "What a terrible pickle you've got yourselves in."

Curiously, not only is this the first time in history Humpty-Dumpty is explicitly referred to as an egg, the illustrations for this edition include a blue box. The language is also anachronistic, and the word "Strax" also appears within reports of the "Paternoster Gang" in reference to a henchman or butler whose "countenance was too abominable to be photographed."

More historical mysteries and references to "the unnamed doctor" are available to read about in Professor Clifford Measey's Myths & Historical Impossibilities, which I highly recommend to all of you. If you don't want to invest money, please check it out at your local library. It really is a fascinating read.

[frost-eyed-autumn]

The stare that he gives Kunikida is carefully guarded, and entirely unaffected by the other man's anger. It might've almost been touching that the other expressed holding his men's lives in such regard, despite that their organizations were bloody enemies under just about any other circumstances -- a sentiment he couldn't really say he shared towards the Agency -- but it also spoke to some of his naivete.

Perhaps to further push his point, or maybe just because he was thirsty, he delayed his response by taking a good, long sip of his drink through the straw before setting it aside again, not so much as flinching or shrinking. Leaning back in his seat, his hands disappear into his pockets, and somehow he manages to look very condescending as he does so.

"What I think about my men is really none of your damn concern." It's the closest thing to honesty Kunikida was going to get out of his response as well. It wasn't as though he really didn't care, but open sentimentality was rather dangerous in his world.

"I know you guys like to be all warm and fuzzy and cuddly with each other, Mr. Goody Two-Shoes detective, but the mafia are entirely different. We're a business of profit and power first and foremost. Nobody joins it because they think its a good place to make friends, otherwise they shouldn't be joining the mafia in the first place. It's a well known fact that most people who join won't last past the first year."

A revelation he had been told himself many years ago, by his friends in the Flags the day they died celebrating Chuuya's own one year anniversary with the mafia.

Now that Chuuya was an Executive himself, it was partially also his responsibility to put those who joined through the pressure cooker and weed out those who were unfit for the life before they got in deep enough to get put on the Black Lizard's Hit List for defecting and knowing too much.

"The ones who do are certainly worthy of my respect, but I'm sure you must realize given how big our organization is and the high turn-over rate we have that getting bent out of shape about every life that's lost is a fast-track exercise in self destruction. If you're not able to live with yourself and that reality, then one way or another, you're just going to end up another one of the dead ones. But then I guess it would be easy to live with that conviction you have when your own casualty rates are so low. Unfortunately unlike you, we don't have the luxury of having anyone in our organization with an Ability like that doctor-lady of yours."

Not yet at least, though with the arrangement between the Agency and Mafia, that very well might change depending on how things played out soon.

@frost-eyed-autumn

“Is that really how you see it? Lives are not just numbers or profit. Human lives are more precious and important than that.”

He should not be surprised. This was the mafia. Their views and ideals were very different but that didn’t stop Kunikida from being angry at what he was hearing.

“Do you really care so little? Those men work with you, fight with you, follow your orders and you feel nothing for their deaths? You are right, losses don’t affect the mafia as much as it affects our agency but to hear that you see your men as replaceable and saving costs like medical leave or ammunition, it…”

Was too cruel and inhumane. He only planned to thank the mafia executive and leave but perhaps this was a mistake. He was starting to think his thanks were wasted.  

“I have never met your men or agree with what they do but I feel really saddened that this is how you think of them.”

[unknownperson-is-not-known]

Rating hunter's weapon/skills

Warning: mentions of broken bones, blood, bruise, gore etc etc.... I'm not a doctor so this is probably not accurate

Hell ember

-its a shark plushie....

-the only way he can kill you is that he suffocate you or have ungodly amount of power

-so 0/10

-but if we're talking about his old weapon then.... Yup. It WILL hurt

-you are alive but not thriving

-yes he can use it to kill you but it depends on his force/where he strikes really. 7/10

-his puppet is made out of metal(?) so yeah you will get bruises

Smiley face

-imma be honest idk how it works but it will probably hurt

-but from his animation he's kinda thrusting so the tip is only hitting you also it's blunt so it's more of a bruise

-this sounds dirty out of context but yeah 5/10

-but old weapon.... 10/10 it's literally a CHAINSAW unless you have plot armor

The ripper

-yeah.... About your back

-rip (no pun intended)

-it depends on how hard he hit you

-worst case scenario is that he hit your nerves and stuff (I'm not a med school student don't ask please)

-best case scenario he just scratch your back lol

-6-8/10

-foggy blade is a different story tho.

-ill assume that it's like a force of wind hitting your back which again, depends on distance/how hard etc.

-so for me i think it's just bruise 4/10

Gamekeeper

-do you see that shit????

-it doesn't hit you

-it doesn't hit your spinal cord

-but that shit goes through you 10/10

-but if he hit you then about 6/10

-now Bear traps....

-you won't die (unless you are left to bleed out) but it will hurt so fucking much

-7/10

Violetta

-bruises

-her arm (legs?) Is made out of metal so it's just bruises 4/10

-her web is just going to make your skin very itchy that's for sure 1/10 unless you cannot tolerate it like me then 3/10

-now cacoon death...

-i think you'll die because of lack of air which kinda explain why you die faster than the rocket chair 8/10 not painful as others but is very unique

-im not going to talk about her throwing web though

Geisha

-the most tolerable out of anyone (except hell ember shark plushie lol)

-yes it's hard but hey you live and it won't hurt much like others 1/10

-no butterflies they don't hurt ya

Feaster

-bruises

-it hurts the next day but not the match lol 6/10

-the is way too short so....

-if we considered that he has so much power then... Some broken bones?

Wu Chang

-more bruises 2/10

-ill just assume that their skill just f with your mental health

Photographer

-ah yes everyone favorite short midget bald grandpa with Donald duck colo(u)r palette

-its a sword

-ALSO he actually have training 7/10

-i won't rate photo world

Mad eyes

-our ACTUAL favorite grandpa

-off topic but if you main Chad eyes i respect you and your dedication so much

-but if we are talking about his walls then....10/10 you are dead

-okay so bruises again 6/10

-EDIT: yeah imma change that to 10/10 bc of the steam... Might burn ur skin off

Dream witch (servant)

-pickaxe

-self explanatory really 7/10

Axe boy

-an axe

-7/10

-BUT remember he's a decapitated child so he won't really have much power so 5ish/10

-fire ball jkjk but 2nd degree burns go brrrrr 8/10

Evil reptilian

-kinda like geisha but sharper so 4/10

-okay....

-anyone forbids that this lizard man get presence

-WILL crush you and step on you (lucky simps)

-10/10 ain't no way you are gonna survive

Bloody Queen

-quick question

-how isn't her finger cut off yet????

-shes pretty much a corpse

-4/10

Guard 26

-spike go brrrrr

-yup that's gonna hurt

-6-7/10

-BUT BOMBS!

-Again 2nd degree burns

-7-8 ish /10

"Disciple"

-shes doesn't outright stab you with that so 4/10

-but if she stabs you instead of slapping you....

-again depends where soooo 6-10/10

-if her cat have rabies then you are dead 10/10

Violinist

-it doesn't hurt much 1.5/10

-bro got scammed by the devil lololol

-his skills literally make people ears bleed

-0.5/10

Sculptor

-my main :D

-she uses telepathy so i can't calculate

-but she seems to be new at it

-ngl at the end of her attack she's like trying to pick her chisel up

-its a shallow stab 4/10

-BUT

-STATUES

-MORE BRUISES

-also by her description you need to be crash into something with her statues

-so assuming that she chips everytime and you crash against the wall then....

-broken bones

-bruises

-internal bleeding

-10/10

Undead

-bro sword is like clouds sword from final fantasy 7/10

-he slug you

-ALSO charge attack skill makes your heart skip a beat 10/10

The breaking wheel

-spikes

-hey um breaking wheel mains out there...

-how tf do you play him?

-i can't even kite him ffs

-anyways there's no hope you are dead 10/10

Naiad

-another shallow stab but this time it's sharper so 5/10

-despite what people thinks

-she doesn't drown people in her abyss (even though it will be pretty cool and horrifying at the same time

-theres just creatures from the sea that bites you 4/10

Wax artist

-bruises y'all know the drill

-2nd degree burns from wax

-3/10

-EDIT: change to 7/10 if the weapon thing is boiling (i forgot what it's called)

-also can someone explain his backstory and why people think he's racist????

Nightmare

-shallow stab gang

-4-5/10

-his crow did nothing at all sooooo-

Clerk

-what is she even holding????

-a cane?

-anyways about 1.5/10

-also what is her backstory and what is her gameplay? I legit can't play her

Hermit (the frog)

-cane 2/10 but he have to hit you like million times to down you/hj

-yall know how it feels like to be paralyze???

-its kinda weird you feel but also don't feel

BONUS

-so about 6/10

Night watch (nagito Komeada/hj)

-I would say 7/10 if he stabs you with it but he kinda slap you with it 4/10 (it's still metal anyways)

-WINDBLADE i mean... Cyclone The wind won't affect you much UNLESS he pulls you in and you got crash into a wall or something.

-again it depends

-0-1/10 if it's just the wind 8/10 if you crash into everything

patroller

-bites you so 8/10 lol

-rabies.

-you can't convince me otherwise so 10/10

A/n this is 1 am so I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense/rating kinda weird

BONUS BONUS:

THOMAS THE TRAM

INFINITY OUT OF INFINITY

THE MOST OP HUNTER

[aiweirdness]

2020 headlines

Midway through 2020, people started suggesting that I train a neural net on 2020 headlines, and I was skeptical that there would be enough weird ones to make a decent project. Then 2020 continued to be 2020. We started to get headlines such as:

Mysterious alien-like monolith discovered in Utah desert What you need to know about 'murder hornets' The Mystery of The Platypus Deepens With The Discovery of Its Biofluorescent Fur Famous Vienna hotel turns to drive-in cake

And by the time we got to December, with more bioluminescent marsupials, mysterious monoliths, and the Galactic Federation, my course was clear.

I decided to use GPT-3, whose internet training data was all collected before October 2019. In other words, before 2020 happened. I gave GPT3 a list of 2020 headlines and let it add more text to the list. Having no data from 2020, would it even treat these as real headlines?

A lot of the generated headlines were from the natural world, in part because my list of examples tended to favor those. I really can’t tell if these are attempts to do novel but realistic headlines, or to completely goof around.

Swarming bears are given deadly slingshots by Russian hunters Good news / Bad news about crows in Burlington schools When Killer Orchids Attack: How the Deadly Corpse Orchid Is Turning Up in U.S. Backyards Apparently There is No Good Photo of the "Melbourne Spider" Desert mystery - what is this rock that looks like a plane ticket? Fears rise of new dwarf hippo public relations disaster after rise in sightings Mysterious Origin of Monster Deep-sea Toads Solved What are 'dragon cats' and why they are getting hyped? Massive radioactive sinkhole continues to grow in Russia Why scientists believe the 'Killer Raccoons of the Pacific Northwest' are responsible for this kill Lycoperdons, the tiny deadly puffballs, are on the march again From deep in the Earth, darkness “boils” to the surface A sassy tardigrade previews new Doctor Who

With other generated headlines, it looks more like GPT-3 assessed the 2020 headlines and went, “Murder hornets? Yeah okay and hellhounds too.” (This is clearly an algorithmic error; hellhounds are MUCH more likely to be found at the Denver International Airport.)

Proof that a hellhound is living at Los Angeles Airport has been provided in the photos below First naked bogman has been found out walking the great British countryside Reports of a '10-foot tall penguin' roaming about on the Family Islands in the Solomon Islands are investigated Albino green sea monster filmed ... at the wrong time Scientists discover the alien ant farm under the Antarctic ice Lizardman: The Terrifying Tale of the Lizard Man of Scape Ore Swamp

I like its science/technology headlines. So many good little bots.

Researchers fear our solar system is being interfered with by alien space lasers Mars rover finds only artificial organic matter on surface Scientists Recreate Giant Liopleurodon In Lab 'Lost' NASA space shuttle repair robot comes back to life after four decades in complete darkness Hey, Curiosity Rover, Don't Go Chasing Shadow Bugs Small drone takes on six killer sharks in Shipwreck (Video) Mysterious Hole Observed On the Sun How did we miss this massive alien spaceship lurking on an abandoned asteroid? Scorpions on the dark side of the moon NASA: Has Earth 'Halted' And Stopped Spinning - If What NASA States is True, We Must All Celebrate! NOW!

i only showed the most interesting sorts of headlines; plenty were just ordinary news from 2019 or earlier. Others were new, technically, but not exactly news:

Breathing Is "Supercharging" Brain Voyager 1 images: See contents of interstellar space Scientists Take Photos In See-Through Scuba Gear, and This Is What They Got Scientists do science… … and then write about it! Scientists say climate change deniers should sit on a beach until it is underwater

Subscribers get bonus content: I tried another experiment in which I tried to produce more targeted headlines, around the theme of… tumbleweeds. (It turns out there were a LOT of dramatic tumbleweed headlines in 2020, due to their habit of descending on various places in apocalyptic numbers).

On the subject of GOOD things that have existed in 2020: please consider my book on AI, You Look Like a Thing and I Love You: Amazon - Barnes & Noble - Indiebound - Tattered Cover - Powell’s - Boulder Bookstore

[sshbpodcast]

We flatter you, sir, we flatter you!: The best Cardassians in Star Trek

By Ames

We’re wrapping up our series of alien species discussions with one of our favorite Star Trek races: the Cardassians! These are a people that are so varied that it’s a relief from more monocultural societies. Instead, we get to see all kinds of individual motivations that make our reptilian friends tick. Whether they’re fascinating villains, redeemed heroes, or (more likely) a little bit of both, these are the best of the best that A Star to Steer Her By has compiled for you!

Cardassians concoct some of the best-laid schemes of the show, even outdoing the best Romulans we discussed previously. Check out our favorite spoon-headed friends below, listen to our discussion on this week’s podcast episode (Cardi chatter at 1:00:08), and pour yourself some kanar as we toast the Cardassian Union!

[images © CBS/Paramount] 

Ames – You knew I was a snake…

Dukat

Mila

Madred

How could I not pick some of the most villainous, secretive, manipulative characters we’ve met in all of Star Trek? I’ll start things off with our favorite gul whose layered portrayal, self-serving motivation, and sexy swagger drive him head, neck, and shoulders (but especially neck) above the competition. Let’s also give some praise to Tain’s housekeeper who has hinted depths that Andy Robinson makes canon in A Stitch in Time, and to the nefarious Orwellian agent from TNG who had Picard seeing who knows how many lights?

—

Chris – Shades of obsidian

Garak

Damar

Marritza

We see in Chris’s favorite Cardassians how a character can go from toady in an evil government to rebel for a good cause on their way to redemption, or at least as close as they can get with the number of literal skeletons in their closets. There is a thick grey area for characters like the former Obsidian Order operative turned simple tailor, for the right-hand man to a tyrant turned revolutionary leader, and to the file clerk turned martyr for the people his kind nearly obliterated, and we salute them!

—

Jake – A few good lizard men

Marritza

Damar

Ghemor

Jake’s picks turn out to be good people at heart, contrary to the totalitarian nature that drives most Cardassians. Early in DS9, we were fans of the lowly file clerk who concocted a needlessly elaborate scheme to bring about some much warranted justice. Later, we got to watch the full realization of one character who sees the Dominion for what they truly are and sacrifices himself for the cause. And pour one out for the rebellious father who tries to save his daughter only for someone who looks like his daughter to save him.

—

Caitlin – Wanna spoon?

Ghemor

Rejal

Garak

Caitlin put together a list of Cardassians who follow their hearts and do what they do for the love of family, romance, and maybe just some lunch with a cute Starfleet doctor. We were fully sympathetic to the secret rebel who formed a fatherly kinship with Kira through their couple episodes together. DS9 gave us some great awkward tomfoolery when a young Cardassian scientist got the hots for O’Brien of all people. And what else can we say about Gar/shir that slashfic all over the internet hasn’t already planted in our wildest imaginations?

—

Those are all the alien races we’re covering for this blog series, so thank you for taking this trip through the galaxy’s family tree with us. There will be plenty more topics for us to explore as we get through more Trek, so continue following along here, keep up with our trip through the Delta Quadrant on SoundCloud, hail us on Facebook and Twitter, and count how many lights you see. We’ll wait…