#we dont talk about the constant art style change ..

[phewgitoid]

smile 4 the camera !

[heron-iles]

Well I’ve been wanting to write this for a long time. This is going to be a long post so I’ll put a “read more”, but for those who are interested, I want to talk about male characters with dresses and how some people turn that into a fetish instead of normalizing it.

Well first of all, we need to talk about yaoi.

We all know what yaoi is, and if you don’t god I wish I were you. Yaoi acordiding to wikipedia is “a genre of fictional media originating in Japan that features homoerotic relationships between male characters. Though it is typically created by women for women and is distinct from homoerotic media marketed to gay men, it attracts a male audience and can be produced by male creators.” I think the definition is problematic enough to know that yaoi isn’t a genre that features and normalize mlm relationships, and it’s more of a genre for women who look for something they think it’s “morbid”.

Well after explaining what yaoi is and how their fans (fujoshis) are, one of the biggest damages to society that yaoi has done is the “uke/seme” or “top/ bottom” dynamic. Yes we all have done “top/bottom” jokes in the past, but we need to be aware of the connotations. This “uke/seme” thing, basically makes a gay relationship into a straight relationship. Let me explain myself, basically we all know that wlw and mlm relationships are different from straight relationships, but what yaoi fans do is, turn those mlm relationships into basically a straight relationship, putting one of the guys into the “woman” role. This is actually wrong in a lot of ways, from the fact that it stablish a dynamic of “strong man” to “soft uwu boy” to the fact that it’s even  mysoginistic. There isn’t a man and a woman in a mlm relationship. There isn’t a man and a woman in a wlw relationship. Please stop trying to reduce every single lgbt+ couple into a man and a woman.

Now that I’ve explained what yaoi is and the problem of the uke/seme relationship, let’s talk about the issue why I’m writing this: dresses.

We all know that, there is still people out there that think that only women can wear dresses. Yeah, probably most of us know that this isn’t true and EVERYBODY can wear a dress if they want, because a piece of cloth shouldn’t be tied to your gender identity. But you know, we would be living in an ideal world if we all tought that. Out there, there are a lot of wrong ways of representing men in dresses, from genderbenders that are transphobic to  putting that male character into a dress but treating him like a “soft uwu I’m baby please senpai not treat me bad” way. Yes, they are men in dresses but, why do you need to give them a completely different personality? Why do you need to draw them in a more feminine way in comparison to others? I mean, art styles are different, maybe your art style is feminine, but when you draw your men with dresses in a different way to your men with pants, maybe, just maybe, you are fetishizing them.

Wait I mean is, yes men can obviously act feminine or have feminine features but what I’m talking is about the intention of drawing them like that. The intention of completely changing the way you treat a character once he has a dress, the intention of changing their personality, the intention of making a joke out of it.

I don’t want to directly name animes or media where you can see men being fetishized because I don’t want to cause any kind of drama directly with any fandom but instead, I will talk about a character that represents in a good way the concept of “dresses are not assigned to gender”.

Here you have Shirayuki Fuuma, he is an idol from the idol unit Dolce (from honeyworks). I only read the manga once and there are better people in the fandom to talk about him, but he is a boy who wears dresses for his idol persona. He isn’t forced, it’s his own decision (talking specially about this because most of the bad ways or representing men in dresses have somethin to do with being forced) and most important, it’s treated with respect. With respect, I’m not only refering to in universe, I’m also talking outside of the canon. Fuuma wasn’t created with the intention of being a joke. Fuuma wasn’t created as a way to attract fujoshis, Fuuma wasn’t created as an “uwu soft boy in a dress”. Fuuma was created just like any other character. 

I haven’t found good full body pictures of Fuuma without his idol clothes, but here you have a comparison just to show how you can draw a man with a dress without changing anything more than the clothes. (also, one thing I forgot to say, Fuuma also wears dresses outside of concerts).

As you can see, everything is the same, the only difference is the clothes!! But the character is treated with respect!!

There are a lot of characters like him, but some of them are a bit problematic. With problematic I’m not talking about the character, I’m actually talking about the miscommunication between the creator and the fandom. Sometimes creators are lazy, or it isn’t clear if they are trying to be inclusive, or it is a joke. This is when fandom wars happen, because some people headcanon the character as something but other people don’t.

Have you heard about transcoding? Is basically gaycoding but with trans people. Characters who in media are presented as cis, or even say that they are cis but, you can see that there is a subtext there, a subtext that makes you think that they are trans and maybe the creators were not able to make that canon (or they were dumb and wanted to make a cis character, but they didn’t realize the subtext they were creating). This starts a lot of wars in fandoms, the headcanon that someone has against the "canon”. I’m only bringing this up to say two things.

1- Please people have headcanons, shut up if you don’t like it, you don’t need to make a post saying “X IS NOT TRANS BECAUSE LOOK AT THIS SCREENSHOT”

2- Headcanons are valid!!! But never forget that clothes doesn’t have gender, so don’t assume that just because a guy wears a dress or a girl wears boyish clothes they are trans (but I repeat, headcanons are valid!! What I’m trying to say here is that you don’t need these cases of people wearing the clothes of their opposite gender to say they are trans, literally every character can be headcanonned as trans!)

At first, I wasn’t going to talk about this, but I remember the constant wars with characters like Chihiro from Danganronpa or Forrest from Fire Emblem Fates and I thought it was important to talk about this. Headcanons are always valid until they are offensive towards others, so stop creating wars around headcanons.

I can’t actually think about anything more to talk about so long story short, men can wear dresses, dont’ fetishize men wearing dresses, with men I mean ALL men (I’m looking directly at you terfs) and fuck everyone if you like a headcanon it’s your headcanon don’t let people invalidate it.

[cheseyre]

good news, sluts! my brain's no longer being completely stupid (only mostly), i've seen the new asides and...have some thought-y thot thoughts:

*deep inhale*

Okay, first things first: this art style is soooo fucking cUTE and I'm a jealous, squealing bitch. Anyone who knows who the artist is, could you link me to them, stat? I think Thomas mentioned them at the beginning of the ep, but nYeh, brain hurt, doesn't wanna do wooork-

Okay, I'll admit, I was a little...apprehensive when I first saw the thumbnail and title. Part of it's just me being a bitter Remus Stan, but also...okay, deep breaths, controversial opinion time, get ready:

I don't ship Prinxiety.

Like, at all. 

I can see the appeal, and these dorks were so very, VERY cute in this particular ep, but I was honestly turned off by the ship long ago due to how overwhelmingly popular it is and how some fans characterize these two and treat this relationship as if it's the only valid one, y'know, the works—slight tangent, but that's also why I don't ship Logicality or Remile. I honestly vibe much better with ships like Roceit or Analogical, y'know?

Cutting in for another brief tangent: I'm surprisingly okay with Demus/Dukeceit/Receit/Trashnoodle/Whatever-Their-Ship-Name-Is-Oh-God-Why-Do-They-Have-So-Many-Fucking-Names; maybe it's cause they haven't actually interacted in canon and the fan content gives me such good Gay Disney Villain content, idk man im weird—).

Still, their interactions were both hilarious and sweet and like I said, I see the appeal, it's just not my cup of tea. y'all Prinxiety fans got fucking FED and I'm happy for you nerds. Enjoy ze happy boys!

I guess another factor in my...low-key hesitance when I first saw what the ep was about is that...okay, get ready, another controversial opinion, le gasp: well, I'm not a big Virgil fan. In fact, at times, he swaps places with Patton as my least favorite sides—especially with some of his recent behavior in eps like DWIT (the "prohibit your breathing comment" really triggered me, for example). Sometimes, his attitude, especially around other sides like Roman or Janus, reminds me a little too much of my sister, who I don't have...a very good relationship with. Add to that how the more...intense side of the fandom has a disturbing tendency to turn him into the 'uwu precious woobie emo baby who can do no wrong' while unnecessarily villainizing other CERTAIN sides in the process, and...I think you all see where I'm going with this little rant 😅

However, upon actually watching the ep, he wasn't...that bad? I don't think? I enjoyed watching him be a flustered, disaster-y mess and genuinely excited at the end, his interactions with Roman were nice enough, and him literally pushing Thomas to make a move with Nico despite his obvious panic attack was a nice moment of genuine character development. I like seeing that, that's the good shit right there. And him being all flustered and shit, and smiling so much at the end of the vid was just...well, adorable. This man has no fucking right to be this cute, my god

alsoooo 

pURPLE EYESHADOW

PURPLE EYESHADOW HE LOOKS?? SO GOOD?? WTF?? SLAY EMO, SLAAAAAAAY FUCK, DOES THIS MEAN I HAVE TO CHANGE MY HALLOWEEN COSTUME NOW?

alsoooo 

hAPPY ROMAN

YESSSSS~ MAH BOI MAH SON MAH DUMB BITCH HIMBO PRINCE MAH EXTRA MESSY CINNAMON ROLL

ITS  BEEN SO  LONG

AND HIS LITTLE HEART EYES THROUGHOUT THE VID, OH MY GOD-

IMMA JUST IGNORE THAT "ADDING [MISTAKE] TO THE LIST" COMMENT I AM LOOKING AWAY I DO NOT SEE IT LALALALALA

THOMATHY, SIR, YOU HAVE NO RIGHT MAKING THESE TWO GAY IDIOTS SO BAEBY

Okay, but Virgil not realizing that "cyberstalking in real life" is literally just stalking is both a big ass mood and further proof that, yes, Logan is indeed the only one holding the braincell out of this disaster of a lot. God help them all if he ducks out in the next ep.

👀

And Thomas x Trash Can is my new OTP.  I dub thee ✨ "Trashmas" ✨

we sTAN TRASHMAS

Wait, does that mean Remus actually WAS in the ep? Cause, y'know, trash man?

hmmm

👀 👀 

Okay, okay. 

With how much Virgil and Roman were going off about Thomas constantly lying, I was (understandably) a tad bit disappointed my snek son didn't even make a fucking cameo, but y'know what? In hindsight, I'm okay with this it's fineee~

He was just off playing with shadow puppets and stealing money from us desperate, content-starved peasants with his sheer extra-ness and, honestly? Gotta respect the hustle. 

Get that precious, precious coin, dapper snake! Wring us poor losers dryyyy!

*evil snek laugh*

Also, this is a breather ep and adding Janus in probably would've caused unnecessary drama with the Roceit breakup and the constant antagonism between Virgil and him. It probably would've distracted from the point of the ep (flirting with social anxiety, exactly what it says in the tin)—much like it wasn't really Virgil or Remus's place to show up during POF. Does that make sense? I think it makes sense. Sorry, brain going brr-

Still, I can't believe the "Fuck Janus Sanders" Club is actually canon now 😂

God, first Patton in a skirt and now this. 

Thomas Sanders, you delight in fucking feEDING this gremlin nest of a fanbase, don’t you? You RELISH our screams of joy and pain and suffering, dON’T YOU?

What's next, actual canonical Janus and Remus interaction? Patton saying the fuck word? The Dragon Witch comes back? Janus's bowler hat gains sentience and takes over the world, Doris-style? What do you have planned, Thomas? Joan? WHAT ART THOU PLANNING, I MUST KNOW YOU HEATHENS YOU FIENDS-

And Virgil's little "would it be fair to him" comment, tho.

👀

Like, I get in the context of the ep, he was likely talking about Nico and how it wouldn’t be good for a potential relationship with Tomas to be founded on lies, but still...my anxceit heart aches, man. 

Gimme that sweet, sweet angst with a side of mutual regret and possible future reconciliation and maybe something more wink wink nudge nudge on top, pls

...and fries.

Honestly, tho, that entire bathroom monologue was fucking beautiful, man. And relatable, too—i can't tell you how many times I've talked to myself in public restrooms because I just didn't know how to get the words I wanted to say out. It's...kind of embarrassing, tbh

Speaking of embarrassing, uh, crying stall guy.

Just...

Crying Stall Guy

Like, I was expecting someone to come out the bathroom stall after Thomas stopped talking, but...I honestly wasn't expecting that. God, that whole scene was so cringe worthy and fucking hilarious

Honestly, Thomas in the ep in general was a huge ass mOOD and we collective gay/bi disasters ALL related with him, and if you say you don't, you're either lying to yourself or a demon. 

There is no in between 

sorry I don't make the rules

Like, I get this series is literally a gay disaster talking to himself for thirty minutes or longer, but like- EMPHASIS on the 'disaster' part 😂

Like...Thomas, you're lucky you're such a goddamn bean, because GOD, I cringing so hard when he first started talking to Nico

Although, I too have apologized profusely for genuine mistakes and am a flustered bi mess around my crush sooo

😅

And god, Roman's "thirty = old man" jokes made me feel old...and I literally just turned twenty, like, come on, man!

Maybe that's because I was literally watching this ep after finishing my ACT and had been sitting with a bunch of high schoolers, with their tiny fucking desks and tiny fucking water fountains smeh

*clears throat*

Anyways, uh, we STAN Nico Pintrovert Florés in this house

Like

He gives me such big Carlos from WTNV vibes for some reason and this makes me sooo happy

and YESS, he's a WRITER

And he's??? So sweet?? A pure bean?? Just sits on his laptop at the mall food court all day, like a god-fucking iCON?? A Nightmare Before Christmas fan?? weARS GLASSES??

my hEART

*cries*

The fandom seems torn between "Nicomas" and "Karrot Kings" as a ship name atm—personally speaking, I'm casting my vote for the latter

*crosses fingers* please dont be another janus x remus multiple ship name issue guys, please please please I can't keep track of them all-

*clears throat*

On that note, I'm guess I'm gonna go try and whoo over my crush with carrots now. If THIS disaster can do it and make it actually fucking work, god damnit, so cAN I

Meanwhile, in hell, my brain's just screaming "CANON LOVE INTEREST CANON LOVE INTEREST CANON LOVE INTEREST-"

God, I hope Nico isn't just a one-shot character, he's too pure and Thomas and him are adorable gay Disney fans and I stan

Oh, I wonder how the other sides'll react to him.

Wait.

Oh god.

Oh god.

This ep just unleashed a new fresh hell of potential Nico x Sides ships, hasn't it?

Welp, time to prepare for ze incoming flood of fanfics, I guess. I'll get my umbrella and rain boots.

That last shot of Virgil during the endcard was so fucking ominous oh my god mom im scared can you come pick me up-

Goddammit, Thomas and Joan, I'm NOT fucking ready to be traumatized again, fUCK

I wish I wasn't a broke ass university student so I could contribute to Thomas's gloriously extra Patreon—both so I can support my favorite content creators who make this amazing blessed content and also, to join my boi Janus in fucking  destroying society by giving money to the people who actually deserve it, fuck YOU GOVERNMENT-

Okay. 

Okay. 

New headcanon time as to why Patton, Remus, and Logan weren't in the ep: they were helping Jan film that Patreon promotional video. 

Like

Remus directed it, Logan helped with the lighting and script, and Patton was just there as the cheerleader. 

The reason Janus made a dog with shadow puppets wasn't just to flaunt his deity status and prove how he is truly above us mere wretched mortals 

despite that being the absolute truth and we all know it, don't lie to yourselves

No, it was really him trying to do something cute and silly for Patton, because Moceit rights, daMMIT

*inhales*

noww 

guys, gals, and nonbinary pals

it’s time forr

the most wonderful time of the yearrr

WAITING FOR THE NEXT EPISODE

Step right up, folks! Hear ye, hear ye, my prediction for the next episode: Prinxiety v. Moceit! With special guest stars: Karrot Kings vibing in adorable gay and Intrulogical, bitter at being excluded aGAIN

Who will win? Who will lose? 

here’s a hint: we all will because in this sick twisted game they are no winners only losers-

Place your bets, folks! ✨

Haha im not readyyy~

tl;dr

this episode has cleared my skin, watered my crops, and ended my suffering—an adorable calm before the... angsty fucking shitstorm that’s coming far too soon. Prinxiety stans, enjoy your food. Place an 'F' in the chat for me and my fellow grieving Remus stans. Trashmas is the true OTP, but Karrot Kings is cute too I guess. I've only had Nico Florés for 24 minutes, but if anything happens to him, I'll kill everyone in this room and then myself. Purple eyeshadow Virgil makes me question my sexuality aGAIN, and happy gay disney prince rights y'all. Say a big ole 'fuck you' to capitalism by giving your local dapper snake moneys. Concussion makes brain go brr and imma go buy some carrots and be gay now.

psst hey @quarantinevibes2020​ you wanna join me in being disaster-y? i’ll bring my best gay stare and you bring the wine

Until next time, my lovelies! ~ Ches 🖤

[bileshroom]

how do you feel about the new sally face chapter?

Im glad you asked! under a read more for spoilers for chapter 5

Myself and Fox are giving our opinions in this post so it will be very long

There were things i really liked and things i really didnt like

for example, the swapping dimensions and the changing art styles were very neat! i liked some more than others, like the rubber hose style for sal could of been a bit different in my opinion, @shinysnek did an edit/drawing and tweeked the tiniest thing and made the design alot more palatable 

and the minigames were… really repetitive and sometimes very confusing ? esp todds door, the plus’s were almost impossible to notice! slightly darker grey against light grey just makes it look like part of the door :/ and the 3d bits were a bit hard to control during the later part of the game

and the writing,, it felt super rushed as if he just wanted to saddle alot of the damage onto native americans??? that completely came out of the blue, like he couldnt come up with some sort of cop out for why the cult is doing what they do

and still with the weird queer baiting with larry? like he made them brothers but is still pushing it, if steve wanted sal’s love interest to be ash why not have moments like ‘that’ with her instead?? it feels very uncomfortable in my opinion especially with him saying he was still,,comfortable with the ship which REALLY rubs me the wrong way

and the ending,,, dont even,, TALK to me about the ending, it honestly made me so upset?? like, and the epilogue to go with it,,, like okay cool the worlds still fucked over and todds still corrupt and larrys just gone??? for no real reason???????? hes just gone :| okay 

gnome larry was funny tho, didnt really explain why Larry got super old while megan stayed a 7 year old, i suppose you can explain it with like when ghosts arent bound to a place they can wither and age? i dunno whatever chapter 5 sucked and it felt like steve just didnt want to do it anymore

—

my turn! alright im going to be typing my opinion from a fellow writer and programmer’s POV.

the beginning of the game kinda drops you in which was a little surprising, considering the other chapters were very rich with exposition which is one of the things i loved about SF. 

It had this way of bringing you in even though you didnt know what the heck was going on. It made you want to learn more and it felt like you were THERE with sal. 

But this opening with just… ash tossed in fell a little… flat. yeah… graveyard… lets toss in some epitaphs as a reminder of who died, ok… cool. 

next lets talk a little about the general story. im not going to lie, this felt like a TOTALLY different game to me and I played them all in succession again to remind myself of the other chapters. 

It was so… plain. It didnt have the eerie-ness of the bologna incident, it didnt have the intriguing mystery of the first chapter where it started you off in the hospital as a little boy with your face hidden, it didnt have that heart wrenching storyline of the 4th chapter.

it was just…. “i need to end this game quick”. 

there was just a unique feeling to the other chapters, something that made you feel gritty and floaty, like you were a dirty teenager hunting for ghosts.

Saddling the natives on the unexplained reason as well… BIG YIKES, steve. the silent hill movies pulled this crap too, and we can all see how flat that fell in comparison to the actual silent hill 3 game. 

There are so so many things you could do instead of that tired (and lets face it) racist stereotype. 

I thought it was going to have a deeper meaning, like… people have had cults for decades that didnt have to do with the natives. hell, he could have even kept with the weird alien theme he was going for. calling an ancient alien creature? that would be pretty badass.

The ending… fell disappointingly flat. ok… everyones dead? so you tortured sal and his pals for literally no reason? granted i didnt press the c4 button so im not sure how that path goes, but i doubt its any more satisfying. 

not to mention the constant queerbaiting that, at this point, makes me so uncomfortable.

yes we get it, steve. you think adopted brothers can fuck, and yeah, theres nothing TECHNICALLY wrong with it (and im using technically by definition, its still wrong in my eyes), but come on. can any of you tell me that wouldnt make you intensely uncomfortable? Its not ok what he did imo and i know its his characters, but steve? either dont make them brothers or stop fucking pushing their romantic interactions.

oh and lets talk about the only other canonly gay couple with any screen time! he killed the black one.

yep… just… let that sink in for a second. did he need to? absolutely not. at least not in such a pointless way.

didnt even give neil any character development tbh, just… token black gay man that needed to be there to be the motivator to search for todd. ok thanks, steve.

and travis (another not white character. no do not argue that hes “blonde”, sal has fucking blue hair and i WILL color pick travis if i have to). he was the other gay character who… yep, lemme look at my notes… died.

he didnt even get much of a redemption tbh, yeah he was secretly helping them, but… wow. toss him in the hole! we dont want to write gays!!! (unless we’re taunting people to get them to play under the guise of “lgbt representation”)

also larrys a gnome and is just… gone forever. just say you hate larry, steve. you didnt have to do him so dirty man.

now then, lets talk about the gameplay.

i was playing with an xbox controller so im going to be from that POV.

the controls were… ok for the most part. the 3d part was a bit hard to see and i got stuck trying to walk past the trees a lot. 

to be honest, the 3d is my only complaint with controls. the mini game later on where youre 3d and shooting tentacles was very hard to control, half the time it wouldnt move fast enough and the other half it would zip past the diagonals. i DID beat it, but i am a very good gamer. to other people who might not play games constantly, might have a bit more trouble and get frustrated.

the puzzles were bland and repetitive. im a horror puzzle game writer and i would NEVER do something this blasphemous in a horror style game. it removes you from the game to think “wow…. THIS puzzle AGAIN?”. it makes you feel like its insulting your intelligence, like “oh here you go you fucking baby, move the shape to match the other shape”

and one of the only other puzzles was that fucking door number puzzle. he made the pluses almost impossible to see for starts, and i KNOW other people had trouble with this. Wanna know how to fix this? make the pluses easier to see and make it so the input pad can only except the number of numbers that the code it. dont make me sit there like a jackass, typing in every conceivable way to order the numbers given.

all in all though, the gameplay was plain, the storyline was bland, the puzzles were mediocre and the only reason to play the chapter is to close up the story and to find out what happened to sal and his mom (which tbh was the only good part because i was actually surprised and excited that it was that that injured him)

i hope in steves next projects he actually figures out how to write an ending and doesnt rush it (and please keep in mind this was rushed even though he had multiple people helping him)

-fox

[tumblunni]

Ehh i think i finally summed up why all of this steven universe diamonds stuff has been so underwhelming.

YES you can redeem a villain

but you have to

actually

TRY

Yes you can write a story about the world’s most fuckin horrible person being really actually sad at heart

Yes you can write a story about an abusive parent actually being able to change

Yes you can write a story about some wild genocidal alien civilization of asshole space rocks actually only doing it because something something societal pressure DESPITE BEING THE ONES IN CHARGE WHO SET THE DAMN RULES I GUESS

But fucking hell its not gonna be EASY and you shouldn’t treat it that way.

All of this shit was SO fucking quick?? And everything else WASNT!

You spent SO long hyping up these guys you spent SO long convincing us that they WERE evil and that they had entirey different motives for what they were doing and EVEN WITHIN THIS FUCKING EPISODE you spent more time showing us White Diamond being absolutely ridiculously existentially horrifyingly awful and refusing every offer everyone gave her to help and refusing every chance and fucking fucking goddamn violating people’s entire minds and just.. fuck.

After all that you cant just fuckin have steven walk up to blue and yellow and say “hey everything you did was bad” and them go “GEE WE NEVER KNEW!” for some reason this time they’re convinced in a single sentence despite it being the same sentence steven said before in every damn episode and pink said to them years before and every person they abused and enslaved and mutilated and KILLED said while they were DYING

And you can’t fucking have white diamond never redeem herself and never change and never admit she’s wrong and steven SOLVE IT WITH FUCKING FIGHTING WHILE SAYING HE DOESNT WANT TO, WHILE THE ENTIRE SHOW TRIES TO CLAIM THE REASON THEY ARE DOING IT THIS WAY IS BECAUSE OF PACIFISM

because seriously he?? just defeated her?? and this made her?? change???

redeeming a villain shouldn’t be easy. redeeming a villain has to have the villain TRY. white diamond has done nothing to prove she really has a heart, prove that she really did all this for sympathetic reasons, prove that she’s able to change, AND ESPECIALLY NOTHING TO MAKE IT UP TO ANY OF THE PEOPLE SHE’S HURT

she just got defeated and basically admitted she’s wrong cos she has no other choice. and i guess her blushing because steven issued a SICK BURN to her is meant to be enough proof that her entire motivation so far has been because of self confidence issues forcing her to put up a false front aka her entire personality we saw so far. If you wanna tell me she’s entirely different to what we saw so far then please could you please give it more screentime than twelve goddamn seconds.

This is like how yellow and blue just suddenly were accepted as part of the family and steven agreed to go with them to homeworld literally just because they realized he “is really pink diamond”. Like they never fucking repented or actually learned to empathise with humans or ever explained why they dont empathise with humans no nope the only answer we got is that they were sad about their sister/daughter/friend dying even though they were already doing all the same evil stuff before that and its what caused her to leave in the first place. no we’re gonna just completely trust them instantly and not even continue making an effort to convince them? we’re gonna trust them so much we’re gonna trust that white diamond will also change just cos we beat her up? COS SERIOUSLY STEVEN FUCKIN DEFEATED BLUE AND YELLOW IN A FIGHT AND THATS THE END OF THEIR ARC, HOW IS THIS PROVING THE POWER OF PACIFISM!! beating everyone up and then saying the same singular sentence again and somehow now it works!! or saying “my mum was pink diamond” and it doesnt convince them but hey if we say it again with magical proof its true then i guess it works now. wow that sure does argue the power of words i guess

everything EVERYTHING they did was just a fuckin misunderstanding cos they dont UNDERSTAND they were doing bad and thus they dont have to face any form of consequences beyond being mildly embarassed i suppose.

if you wanna make that the ending then you need to work to disprove all the hours you spent implying that.. yknow.. they were doing things because they were evil

and even if theyre sympathetic they still did evil things and they still need to work to prove that theyve changed

and ESPECIALLY if you’re making a show very heavy on subjects like LGBT discrimination it shouldnt be FUCKIN WOW UNEXPECTED that the audience would see this plot as a metaphor for stuff like homophobia and abusive parents and.. yknow.. societal oppression in a law system that forces you to live in the closet in constant fear of being discovered and killed. and all the other apparantly accidental undertones of racism and extermination of indigenous people in stolen land which YOU REALLY SHOULD HAVE EXPECTED PEOPLE TO SEE WHEN THE PLOT IS LITERALLY EXTERMINATING PEOPLE TO STEAL THEIR LAND

all of that means you need to do MORE work to prove that that isnt actually what the plot is supposed to be, and more work to redeem villains who are very heavily goddamn triggering to a large part of the vunerable audience YOU SPECIFICALLY MARKETED YOURSELF TOWARDS

this was just so fucking overwhelming and somehow rushed despite being an hour long episode, and i hate it because the show spent so much effort on so much other stuff yet decided to half ass it at the really important part that NEEDED to have thought and time put into it if it was gonna nail the landing

especially after ALL THAT FUCKIN TIME AND EFFORT INTO THINGS THAT ONLY AMPED UP THE VILLAINY AND TENSION OF THESE GUYS AND MADE IT SO MUCH WORSE

like fucking hell how can you be so tone deaf??? this has been in the planning for so damn long and theyve been working on it forever and THIS is what they chose to rush over? this is the priorities they thought were important? even just within this episode if youre struggling to fit it all in then like seriously cut out some of the stuff like the montage of unseen fusion forms that did basiclaly nothing but a few jokes, and the equally as rushed bad lars and sadie romance resolution. Which is another thing that needed a lot of work to fix when the introduction we got to these two was a really unhealthy relationship and a dude who refuses to change despite being given twelve chances but suddenly changes COMPLETELY on the thirteenth one and i guess cos he died that proves he’s all good now. Except he acts all weird and creepy in the very next episode and endangers his new friends by acting all possessive over sadie again and getting angry that she has other friends????

i hate it because ive had to deal with the fandom telling all the people who were rightfully uncomfortable with how these subjects were handled that oh we’re just overreacting and oh wait and see cos they totally have a big plan for the ending or something that’ll make it all make sense. And comparing people being triggered by child abuse and racism to “huhu those dumb su criticals who hate the art style” or whatever...

god, man, its just a deflection of what the issue really is

“oh youre saying NO VILLAINS can EVER be redeemed and NOBODY can EVER talk about dark stuff in shows without being SECRETLY BAD AND SUPPORTING IT IN REAL LIFE?”

no im not saying that im just saying the subjects are fucking depressing to people who’ve suffered from the real life stuff and the villain redemption should be GOOD and should THINK ABOUT THOSE PEOPLE IN THE AUDIENCE if it wants to make up for it

like fucking hell look at how much zuko from avatar went through before his redemption. look at how long he struggled with his morality and how long it took him to realise he was wrong. look at how much detail they showed us on all the people who negatively influenced him into making the bad choices he did. look at how much he went through to make up for what he did and apologise to everyone he hurt. look at how everyone he hurt didnt believe him at first and it took a while for everything to work out. look at how sometimes he messed up and took steps backward before getting to where he needed to be. and look at how he actually changed as a person and continued learning and growing and trying to be a good person even far into the future after the story ended.

hell, fuckin look at PERIDOT! peridot had a full goddamn zuko arc! peridot had more screentime than all of the diamonds combined, and it was way better utilized! she had a full process from being introduced as a scary villain BECAUSE OF MISUNDERSTANDING WHO SHE REALLY WAS, then being revealed as having a fully rounded personality, flaws and redeemable traits while still being a villain. and moments of her proving that she did indeed only become a villain because she didnt understand what she was doing was wrong, and a personality that matched with that reveal rather than having NO INDICATION she was like that until it suddenly happened only after she was defeated. and her redemption came slowly through friendship with steven and it had moments of the other characters not instantly trusting her and also of her making mistakes and struggling with believing steven’s philosophy when it went against everything she knew about life. and speaking of which it was established that she had a very different life which had negative influences pushing these ideas upon her, and tough stuff that made her scared and pressured. Not just being in a high position of ruling over a planet in the lap of luxury and ONLY AFTER BEING DEFEATED do we learn that they feel pressured by the societal expectation to be perfect and they actually would have agreed all along with dismantling the system but they were just too afraid to be honest. Or whatever the fuck that rushed ending was trying to go for! And man even after peridot joins the team she’s NOT redeemed yet, she’s initially only halfway doubting herself and only teaming up with steven because they’re both afraid of the cluster. And she messes up and says horrible shit to her new friends and feels the consequences of her actions and chooses to change. And her ultimate choice to switch sides is REALLY hard, she gets so close to going back to the diamonds and its a great personal sacrifice on her part when she chooses to give it all up and make an enemy of the person she was so scared of!

and GAHHH that good redemption is one in a million episodes that really set up the diamonds Being Bad and should have been a goddamn tally in the “effort required in the fuckin ending” chart!

could we not have even just had one ten minute episode of blue and yellow going around earth and experiencing human life and realizing there’s things worth protecting? or a few damn scenes foreshadowing white being actually insecure and lying to protect herself, rather than GENUINELY ABUSIVE BECAUSE SHE’S BAD?

and seriously even if you hurt people because you hate yourself YOU STILL HURT THEM

a sympathetic backstory should be a reason why they COULD be redeemed, not proof that they already are redeemed just because the backstory was stated in words and nothing else has fuckin changed.

imagine if zuko just lost one fight to aang and said “yes but my dad abused me” and aang was like “oh no now lets team up with zuko to beat up his dad” and none of the bad things zuko did were ever mentioned again and also he keeps his season 1 personality throughout the entire series

imagine if peridot fuckin.. just changed sides cos she’s funny and we like her. people wantedher to change sides as soon as she acted funny and likeable but they still made the effort to actually prove she had changed! the diamonds didnt act remotely harmless or remotely good until they just suddenly are in the very last episode.

hoo

fucking

ray

also why are we constantly just ignoring all these dark things about homeworld? like the episode with holly blue agate and the famethyst slave caste and all the creepy ways the entire place operated. i totally thought thatd.. yknow.. EVER BE REFERENCED AGAIN?? its never even mentioned that anyone even WANTS to go back and save them?? and the human zoo were outright stated to be like.. unsaveable. “oh theyve never known real human life and theyre happy in their slavery so itd be cruel to take them away from it” One off episode, forgotten about. And the creepy as fuck scenes of gems being BUILT INTO THE WALLS AND DOORS AS SECURITY SYSTEMS and the confirmation that more lapis situations are constantly going on yet somehow that singing hairbrush person doesnt get all the sympathy that she did. And steven going daww at the pebbles instead of being horrified that theyre born to work as servants and forced to live in the walls because the noblewomen dont want to look at them? and he asks them to make him a new outfit?? and theres no plot anything involving them except them puttering around in the background outfitting?? like was none of this meant to be seen as PROOF THAT THE DIAMONDS WERE EVIL and PEOPLE WHO NEEDED TO BE SAVED????

goddddd

please say they were rushed or something please say this is all the faultof being given less time than they expected please say there were other plans for other episodes we didnt see that would have given at least slightly more substance to any of this

also why wasnt this even advertised as the last episode if its the last fuckin episode

hhhh well at least obsidian was a great character design and so were the other fusions and new outfits even if they only appeared for twelve seconds. and white’s whole scary evil mind invasion stuff was really good even if it actually hurt the episode by being good, kinda

man im not even mad or anything i just feel mehh and bored and like im actually glad its over. i never wanted to feel that way about a show that used to be so good. i kinda wish the earliest episodes werent so good if the answers to all those well set up mysteries were gonna have so much less effort than the setup itself

...man i should make a whole post about all the mistaken ways i THOUGHT the show was gonna go that actually would have been way more interesting than the real answer.

i’m just super glad that my last theory was wrong cos wow that would have been the only thing worse than this ending! when white pearl first appeared before we’d actually seen white diamond, and it had all this thing that white diamond hadnt been seen in ages.. well i was worried it was setting up some sort of reverse twist where actually white pearl is bodysnatching white diamond instead of vice versa. So the whole evil empire would actually be run by a member of the slave class that its oppressing, and the diamonds/representative of the upper class would actually be poor victims all along. dear god i am so glad i got that wrong! tho im weirded out by how evil white/pink pearl looked in that first hint that she was originally pink pearl??

anyway basicallly im just so fuckin tired

[svtmatokis]

Closure Part 1

Annyeong~! I’m literally WEEKS away from the end of probation and I am super duper stoked to share with you this next piece. It’s going to be a two parter so look out for the next one soon. 

I’m someone who believes that you shouldn’t live life with regrets and that everything is a learning experience. Everything is meant to happen for a reason and we’re all meant to walk our own paths. Sometimes though, the people that come into our lives are hard to forget. People like your first love for example. 

When I was in grade 11 we had a transfer student from Sask. and he was like that hot new kid that every girl liked. I was lucky enough to have his locker next to mine so we became quick friends.  The thing is, we were on two totally different spectrums of life. He was that popular AP/IB kid who was super smart and took Calculus and wanted to go to top Universities while I was the art student who was involved in a lot of extracurriculars while focusing on Music and Culinary and just wanted to live my life. We were in first aid together and had NOTHING in common. We joked, smiled and shared some special moments while others judged. Why would the hot new kid like someone like me? It didn’t make sense. Eventually, the pressure of his new friends got to the both of us and by senior year, we were nothing more than acquaintances. We talked but it was nothing as in depth as it was before and eventually after graduation, we left with unspoken words and to this day, what if’s still play in my mind.

I’ll never forget him nor will I regret my choices back then. We were young  and if we had stayed the way we were, I dont think I’d be writing this blog right now haha... 

Sorry if this was a bit long, but writing this is closure for me too. I know I’ll probably never see him again but I needed to get this off my chest once and for all. No matter what, he’ll always have a place in my heart. 

NOW TO THE REAL STORY! 

Plot: You were once a trainee with Pledis and had a close relationship with the boys of Seventeen before debut especially Wonwoo. But with the boys debuting so soon and your ambitions changing, leaving was the best choice, but maybe cutting contact from them for five years was not....

Pairing: Reader x Wonwoo

Words: 2565

Genre: A tiny bit of Fluff, lots of reminiscing

“So I’m bringing a friend with me to the meet up tonight” Seungcheol said as the boys finished up practice.

Tonight was a night where all the artists from Pledis got together to hang out. They normally had dinner together before going back to one of the dorms to play games, have dessert and relax outside of their busy schedules. This only happened on rare occasions and were organized by group leaders and their managers so it took a lot of careful planning.

Wonwoo looked up from his phone and raised an eyebrow at his best friend, “Someone we know?”

Seungcheol nodded  his head, “I ran into her a few weeks ago at a cafe and invited her to our get together tonight. I’m going to meet up with her now for dinner so I’ll see you guys back at the dorms.” he said before throwing on a nicer shirt he brought with him and said his goodbyes realizing he was running late.

You sat at the meeting place Seungcheol had told you to wait at so the two of you could have dinner together. You couldn’t believe it had already been close to five years since you last saw him and the rest of the boys. Had it really been that long since you left Pledis?

You thought about each of the Seventeen members, from the oldest but still childish Seungcheol, to the shy gentleman Joshua who you were happy to see had come out of his shell after all these years and of course baby Chan who was still in high school when you left and now he was a graduate and achieving his dreams.

Then there was Wonwoo, the man who no matter how hard you tried, could not rid of from your memories. You leaned back against the bench thinking back to your days with Pledis.

You were one of the older trainees, only being a month younger than Joshua but had entered around the same time Seungcheol had. Not too long later, Jihoon came along and the three of you formed a quick bond both wanting to achieve the similar dream. You and Jihoon became close naturally since composing was something you were both passionate about. Seungcheol was like the big brother you never had, he was always looking out for you but at the same time, he didn’t hesitate to critique you during practices and boy was he harsh sometimes.  

You remembered the day Wonwoo was introduced to the rest of the trainees, it was a few weeks after Soonyoung had joined and you couldn’t help but be intrigued.  He said he was a singer but eventually through Seungcheols influence, he got into hip hop and started rapping.

You remembered the days where you and a few of the other female trainees would sit in on the monthly evaluations and you were mesmerized by Wonwoo’s rapping skills that he had picked up. It complimented his naturally deep voice and his style only added more to his performance.

Eventually as time went on, you two got close since you ran into each other during practices or whenever you were with Seungcheol and Jihoon. Eventually, those group meetings turned into one on one meetings and it was safe to say, you were developing a slight crush on him.

He was quiet and didn’t say much but his actions spoke for him. There were days where practice for you didn’t end till late and Wonwoo would wait for you to finish so he could walk you back to the dorms and stop by for a late night snack along the way. His reason being that it was too dangerous for you to be going home alone though in reality, you normally walked with the girls who lived in your dorm until this habit had picked up.

Other times, he would wait for you outside your dorm building with coffee in hand knowing that you had an early class and he would walk with you to the company all the while enjoying the banter that went back and forth between you two. It was a natural feeling which made your insides warm.

The times you cherished the most were during breaks where a few of you would go to a cafe to relax and it was almost always that you and Wonwoo were together. As the people around you would converse, you would rest your head in your arms while leaning on his arm for support. It brought butterflies to your stomach every time you felt his  fingers gently caress your arm, slowly lulling you to sleep.

But all those moments ended just as quickly as they began. When the boys found out they were going to debut, the boys were on lockdown and working extra hard and all the time that you spent with them was cut short. You didn’t mind because you were working with Bumzu and learning how to compose with Jihoon but because of all that, it meant that you were seeing less of Wonwoo as well.

The two of you always missed each other with timing. Whenever Wonwoo had free time, you would be with Jihoon or Bumzu or at practice and vise versa.

Eventually, the two of you were forced to focus on your respective paths and despite you having feelings for him, had to make that sacrifice and push them aside and soon friends turned into strangers.

You would pass each other in the hallways and greet each other politely but there was never anything more than that. Eventually, as the boys got closer to debut, your own path changed and you found yourself leaving Pledis.

You stated that it was time to move on and that you had other aspirations but deep down, you knew that you were heartbroken and you were running away from your feelings for Wonwoo. Only Seungcheol and Jihoon knew that you had resigned.  There was no big farewell, you had a meal with the two boys on your last day before promising to keep in touch but never did.

As you said goodbye, the memories of you and Wonwoo played back in your mind. The talks, the laughs, the late night walks everything and you had to stop yourself from shedding a tear in front of your friends.

You didn’t think your absence would make an impact on anyone and it didn’t except to Wonwoo who had immediately noticed your absence. When he asked Seungcheol a few months later, a pained look made its way onto his face and the leader only shook his head before walking out of the room not answering.

It was Jihoon who told Wonwoo that you left and cut all contact from everyone and no one could locate you and amongst the boys, Seungcheol was taking it the hardest since the two were practically siblings.

From that day on, you were a constant in Wonwoo’s mind as he was yours.

Five years later, you were a successful composer with Starship Entertainment. The path that you were on with Pledis was different from the one you were on now and looking back, despite what you left behind. You had zero regrets.

Your thoughts were interrupted when someone grabbed you from behind causing you to turn around in shock.

“Seungcheol!” you gasped as the said boy grinned at you before pulling you into a long hug.

The two of you went to a restaurant you both frequented back during your trainee days. It was a small place but had the best Cheesy Korean Chicken and the two of you often found yourselves eating there more often than not.

“Ah...this place feels so nostalgic doesnt it?” Seungcheol asked leaning on the table.

You smiled and nodded your head, “I haven’t been back here in ages.”

“How’s Starship? I heard through Baekho that you left the country for a few years before joining them.”  Seungcheol said after you had ordered.

You nodded your head at his statement. Running into the members of Nu’est had been completely by accident.

After leaving Pledis, you went to do a bit of soul searching and spent three years out in L.A. Nu’est went to film their comeback music video there and it was just pure luck that you ran into them at a restaurant you were at with a few friends Joshua had introduced you to once upon a time. .

Baeko, a member you had bonded with during your trainees days recognized you instantly and called you out.

Once the initial nagging was over, the two of you caught up and you even took him and the other members to your studio your practiced before telling him about the offer Starship had had given you and that you accepted it.

Baekho passed the message on to the others at Pledis and thats what lead to your conversation now.

You and Seungcheol ran into each other backstage at an award show that you attended with Monsta X. They had won an award for their comeback album which you helped produced and wanted to take you in thanks. After the initial shock wore off, you agreed to meet him for dinner the following week..

“I really enjoy working with everyone there” you answered with a smile. “I feel like it was all meant to be.”

Seungcheol nodded his head with a smile. “You looked really happy that night. I can’t believe you helped produce that amazing album. Your skills have seriously improved.”

You blushed at his compliment before thanking him and telling him how proud you were of him and the boys for winning all those awards but also on constantly improving day after day causing him to only grin at you cockily.

There was no anger or tension in the conversation. The conversation flowed like they did back in the day and to anyone who didn’t know the situation, they wouldn’t have been able to tell that you hadn’t seen each other in almost five years. But you also knew that there was a giant turkey in the room and it was no surprise Seungcheol was the one to drop it.

“And you’re one of the most sought after producers in the Korean music industry. Bumzu must be proud. Do you keep in contact with anyone? Outside of Baekho?”

His tone was light but you knew the underlying meaning in his question.

You shook your head, “I only met with Baekho briefly and he gave Bumzu my cell phone number and we only talked on the phone not too long ago. I kind of made it a point to move on with life after I left Pledis.” you explained, “You were all preparing for your debut and I just didn’t feel complete at the agency anymore. I didn’t think it mattered.” you shrugged as Seungcheol shook his head.

“It tore me apart that no one knew where you were after you left. After time passed, I guess a few of the members stopped wondering and moved on with their lives but we can all tell Wonwoo thinks about you alot.” Seungcheol said clenching his hands. “I don’t know what went on between you two before you left but from time to time, when someone brings you up, he gets this distant look in his eyes.”

You sighed, “I’ve thought a lot of about it over the last few years too. What could or should have been. I guess with time, the close friendship we had as trainees faded and we both went our separate ways to walk our own paths. Though at the same time, I feel like there were a lot of things left unsaid between the two of us.” you ran your hand through your hair, “Like we never got any closure you know?”

Seungcheol nodded his head understanding before changing the subject.

“There’s a meet up tonight with a the guys from the company. I said I was bringing someone so I was hoping you’d go with me. I know everyone would be happy to see you again since they heard you were the musical genius behind Monsta X’s latest comeback album.”

You sighed remembering how that was announced. Monsta X had included you in their thank you speech during the award ceremony and you recalled seeing many shocked faces in the area where Seventeen was sitting but remained hidden.

You agreed to go with the promise that if you felt uncomfortable, you would leave and Seungcheol agreed knowing that it wouldnt come to that.

After he paid for the meal, the two of you put your masks on and walked through the streets of Gangnam hand in hand to the Penthouse that the leaders and solo artists had rented out for the get together.

Wonwoo knew the moment Seungcheol walked in and his jaw dropped at who he brought with him.

“No way, is that Y/N-noona?” Mingyu asked shocked as a group started to gather around you and Seungcheol .

Wonwoo couldn’t stop staring from his spot. The last time he saw you was at the monthly evaluation right before you left Pledis though he was sure he caught a brief glimpse of you at the award show the week before sitting with Monsta X’s Shownu.

You felt his eyes on you throughout the night as various artists came to greet you and caught up with those you were once close with. He didn’t approach you but you knew he was watching as if almost waiting for the right time.

Stepping out onto the patio to take a breather, you looked out at the city skyline and let out a sigh. Seeing and catching up with everyone was nice and you were glad they were all doing well. Jihoon had embraced you tightly as soon as he saw you and congratulated you on your success. He even offered to collab on a piece with you one day which you said you would think about.

As you pondered your thoughts, you didn’t hear the door behind you open and shut before feelings someone’s presence next to you.

“It’s been a while…” a deep voice interrupted your thoughts and you turned your head shocked to see the one person who was constantly on your mind.

“It has. How are you Wonwoo?” you asked as he turned to give you a small bow.

“I hear congratulations are in order.” he said with smile looking out at the city skyline.

“Thank you…” you said, “Congratulations on your success. I knew you guys would be great.”

Wonwoo chuckled looking down letting out a hesitant breath, “Listen…” he had to think hard of what he was going to say. Right now, they were treading on light water and he missed when their conversations would naturally flow between them.

“Would...you like to get coffee with me tomorrow?” he asked turning to look at you and he met his eyes before nodding slowly.

“I would like that.” you said with a smile as he grinned knowing he made the right move. The two of you stayed on the balcony in a comfortable silence for a few minutes before you both deemed it too cold and decided to go back inside.

At the end of the night, at Seungcheols insistence, Wonwoo walked you back to your apartment with the promise of seeing you the next day.

Shoutout to @johnaldsuh and everyone else in the Discord chat for the encouragement! - Anna

[ignaviias]

im keeping with last years tradition so here we go for this years big ol gay post im putting it here bc its the place where i can tag the most people since i dont use twitter much anymore anyway the Gay is under the cut

 IRL PEOPLE 

 @edgy-blackberry 

fuck you!!!!!!!!!!! but on a serious note i really love having you as a friend!! im glad we're still in contact even though we cant do the whole sit around the table at lunch shit anymore (bc sixth formers """"""arent allowed"""" . bih. i do what i want) youre really funny nd ald just real nice so like Ideal content you also put up with my fucken Constant shit in the server bc i have zero self control and am too passionate abt bmc and whatever else is my interest at the time heck yeah ALSO I LOVE MILO. TELL MILO I LOVE HIM.

@gaminginfections 

bitch do you even use tumblr anymore??????? idk if youll see this but fuck it anyway!!!!!! ur one of my closest irl friends!!!!! me you and jess are the worst team because we cant be trusted to do anything but thats okay because i love it youre a really nice person like if me and jess are Sad (tm) you always try and help nd thats Excellent i know that sometimes you dont feel as involved bc me and jess have known eachother longer but that doesnt make you any less important to us!! and like above, please tell evie i love her. this is important fuck 

do i know anymore irl people on here that i can tag . fuck it moving on 

 NON IRL PEOPLE 

 im sorry if i miss anyone out!!! dont take it personally im just really fucking shit

@inthenameofsverige 

i dont talk to you often but youre a really chill person!!!!!! youre always there to give nice comments nd i like having you around!!!!! i Love tally and im thankful for the photos and updates you post because i would absolutely die for her love u sweden !!!!!!!!!!

@funkyrooks 

youre!!!  a really good pal!!!!!! youre such a sweet person nd i love you in dnd too !! love bewick!!! and you also make the notes which are life savers bc i have those sweet concentration issues I hope things with uni are going well for you !!! 

@winstoneroticroleplay 

i cant believe i have to have this cursed username in my gay post anyway !! gob!!! i dont speak to you much at all outside of dnd but youre such a chill dm its great - when i first joined i didnt know you but youre the kind of person whos so easy to get along with also you put up with all of our bullshit in dnd and we love you for that 

@enid-is-a-lesbian 

youre another person i dont speak to a lot but youre a really funny person and meeting you at mcm was really fun!! even though i saw you last year we never really all got to talk properly??? i dont count that as much of a meeting but like. this year. good fucken year the chicken incident remains in my heart always and the way that you launched yourself off the chair for that sweet chicken 

@creirdyddlydd 

we literally only met like a few weeks ago but !! heck!! i love rping with you in that chat!! i love the way you play jeremy n im glad that i managed to join it bc its been really fun !! i hope we can keep rping in the future too !! - this applies to like everyone else in that server too but i dont know yalls usernames

okay. okay. these are the Gay ones im putting you two as combined gay then breaking it down to individuals after

 @arvoze and @octovine

 i. love. you two. WUV YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!! youre honestly some of The most important people to me and i wouldnt want to change that for the world youre both so fun to be around and i love how easy it is to talk to you and how easy it was at mcm as well i wish i could go back to mcm and do it all over again because i loved it so much and leaving was so hard and i wont lie i was on the verge of tears while i walked away if im ever in a bad way and things seems so shit just like? talking to you two and pissing about makes everything so much better and im so mad we all dont live near eachother like this is homophobia let me be gay irl

 individuals time

lewis;  YOU. (the temptation to just leave it as this was overbearing) you were one of the first people i ever properly spoke to?? you were so chill and easy to approach so it made it so much easier for me to get closer to everyone else as well i owe you a lot because without you i probably wouldnt have spoken to anyone on that server??? iconic going to present time ; youre always sweet so and nice youre like a fucking dad w the way you reblog my shit i love it youre also always willing to help people even if theyve caused issues and stuff nd i love that!!!!! real fucken mvp!!!! wewis i wuv you 

 jack;  also wuv you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im so glad youre around because i love your sense of humour (you and lewis are the fucken Dream Team) i also Love your art like ?? its a really good style brent. and if i wasnt supposed to be saving money for iceland/uni i would be comissioning you an unfortunate amount of times i know you dont always feel appreciated but trust me when i say you absolutely are nd if you ever need to talk to anyone or just vent shit at then like. hit me up youre really important to me so i want to make sure youre okay!!!!

 --

 like i said earlier sorry if i missed people !! i love you all :* 

[mlm-chanyeol-archive]

you know what? its 2:30 am, im feeling soft and im gonna make a positivity post for all my mutuals. i lov u guys. newer ones at the top n oldest ones at the bottom

@flowerallys we haven’t been mutuals long, but im glad we met because of the dreamie gc! you’re always so happy and i love talking to you <3

@yunjisunq im so happy to have found another ace stan <3 really, thank u for doing my donghun request?? you really made my month and inspired me to make stuff of my own and you’re really sweet and i love when you talk in ur tags!! thats my fave part of following ppl and it makes my dash a little brighter :)

@7deer-ofthe-dawn7 i followed you because one of the nct blogs i follow rbd a mutuals appreciation post bcs i thought i needed more xiuhan on my dash and im rlly glad you followed back!! you’re really nice and even though we dont talk too much its fun when we do! (i hope you’ve enjoyed the fics ive sent you!)

@pcyling man i remember us meeting up on vent and i just decided to message you bcs we both are chanyeol stans and im so glad i did bcs ur rlly funny and nice and we can just thirst over pcy together and just do fun stuff. thank u for not thinking i was weird for messaging you!

@kunpifook we dont talk but i like seeing you on my dash! you reblog a lot of my stuff which makes me smile <3 :)

@hellyeahtd we don’t talk either but thank you for blessing my tag with more topp dogg like it so desperately needs <3

@nctytrack we don’t talk but i remember you asking for more nct mutuals and while when i first followed you i wasn’t a big stan but i am now and i hope im making your dash a little brighter :)

@astros-mom @wonhosassflower maria maria maria ilu <3 im sorry for being a bitch in the gc all the time but ur rlly nice (even tho u blocked me at one point) and ur sweet and i like talking to you. im jealous u got to meet hyungwon tho i can now get a scale of how lanky he rlly is

@live-love-growamoustache niniiiiii we dont talk a lot but i like seeing u in the gc and u post a lot of good stuff <3

@fiizzy-pop tokkiiiiiiii my baby <3 i lov u ur so sweet and nice and helped me out with nct when i was first getting into them and you’re just so sweet and ur our little bun and i hope we can be friends for a long time <3

@youarenotmybias aa i love seeing you on my dash and you post a lot of good stuff!!!! ithinkurinthegcbuticantrememberwhoyouareoops

@99minseok aaaaa i jus lov seeing ur posts on my dash and i lov seeing minseok so much even tho hes not high on my bias list, and just seeing your name makes me smile :)

@ji-hey HEY FUCKER you dont post a lot but we talk a whole bunch and even tho ur mean sometimes to me and al i still love u and i just want to let u know in my time of weakness i think you’re really pretty and im glad we have the relationship we do <3 ur a really good friend soph

@tom-failure aa we dont talk too much anymore but i love seeing topp dogg on my dash and your art is really good and i hope you keep on drawing <3

@flanelltees flan.... mi lov.... you are one of my most treasured mutuals <3 you really mean so much to me and i love seeing you on my dash and i love your deadpan sense of humor and i love helping you start stanning groups and the way you come to me if you need help with something and i love your art, it really is one of the cutest art styles i have ever seen. you’re so talented and im so happy you decided to follow me back because its been so nice talking to you and i love our little jokes and while there are times where we dont talk for a week its always nice to talk to you because you’re so nice :) i lov u flan <3

@brnrnr-prstr we dont talk but again its always nice to see you on my dash :)

@husberttee aleexxxxx my man im so glad i followed you because talking to u was a v good choice :) as a fellow male nakta stan it was rlly nice to talk to you and while its hard to talk bcs of such huge time differences its still fun when we can and even tho you always post abt nugu groups who i have no clue about i still love seeing you on my dash :3

@4jooheon !!!!!! my most sweetest mutual ever!!!! i adore reading your tags when u talk abt jooheon and as a fellow jooheon stan it makes my heart sing bcs same!!!!!! hes our honey bee!!!!!! ive said that so much but its tru!!!!! you really make my dash so much brighter and i love sending you cute asks abt jooheon on anon bcs i love seeing ur reactions!!!!!!! you’re just so soft and i rlly lov u :( thank u for following me back and i hope one day i can reach your level of softness (also i feel relly bad bcs i never learned ur name!!!! ;;;;;)

@annlka annika...... aka sangdo’s wife..... i lov u a lot. your tags brighten up my dash as well and just!!!! i love following ppl who talk in their tags and when you talk abt sangdo it makes me all smiley bcs u just lov him so much and now you’re starting to lov minho just as much and i just LOVE how u tag sangdo as sunshine and minho as moonlight thats just????? so precious i lov ur lov for them and you’re just really nice and understanding too??? and i remember u bringing up the fact that i thought it was a mistake when you first followed me but im glad u did bcs im lucky to have a friend like u annika <3 :)

@dean-winchesters-bootycall even tho ur never on here i fucking.... love you so much ur such a good friend and my best irl friend and im so glad i met you rielle <3

@sweet-jae Al.... Alfie.... The love of my life..... my moon sun and stars.... my entire universe.... words cannot describe how much i love you. When i first followed you i would have never expected us to turn out like this but im so glad we did because it has changed my life for the better. i followed you because you were such a good writer and to this day the choice to go off anon when sending you asks was the best decision i have ever made. you followed me back and we started talking and talking and talking and then we moved over to twitter and when we felt sad we would spam each other pics of our biases and then we moved over to kkt and im pretty sure since that day we haven’t spent a day where we didn’t talk to each other. even if its a simple “good morning’ and “i hope you have a good day today” we still keep talking and along that point i fell in love. now we’re nearing half a year and i just want to say thank you for being there for me. thank you for always talking and updating me on random things because you are the best thing thats ever happened to me. I love you Al <3

@jungjeonkimin we used to talk but we dont anymore but you’re still rlly nice and i love seeing you on my dash!

@ruppels-fox Hi! I know we haven’t talked in like... forever because im not as much into mp100 as i used to be, but you’re a really good friend!!! i loved talking to you and im glad we could bond over mp100 together :) i still love seeing you on my dash

@hybridow1 bro... even tho we never talk and never really have i LOVE seeing you on my dash. you like my kpop posts and you’re a constant presence in my notes and i really i appreciate you dude. im glad we’re mutuals :)

@mushy-mooster Jas.... my baby...... i lov u a whole bunch. ur such a good friend and even though we’ve had our falling outs we’re still friends and the past school year really brought us closer together :) it was always so much fun to help you out with astronomy and i was thankful to have at least one person in the class i knew (and liked cough damien cough) and even tho you post abt dc which i frankly dont like i still love your posts bcs it makes you happy and that makes me happy :) you’re one of my best friends and im glad to have you in my life <3

@bluepandabear329 even if you’re never on here like gabrielle you’re another one of my best friends <3 you helped me through sophmore year and im so glad we became friends mel <3

@rhysymmetra rhys,,,, my man,,,,, we’ve been mutuals for a really long time and i love seeing you on my dash <3 we dont talk but you feel like an old friend and im glad i never unfollowed :) you’re really sweet!

@sanguis-ripam even tho we like... never interact ive been following you since you were trying to boost your go-fund-me for your top surgery, and its been so awesome to see you evolve from that into the man you are today and im really proud. you’re kind of a role model for me and im glad we’re mutuals :) sorry for spamming your dash with kpop lmao

@transmanlukeskywalker god... bro ive been following you since our google plus days. i remember you made a really gay oc like... fuckboy mctrash something and i still have drawings of him... you’re another one of my treasured mutuals and i hope you’re doing okay :) if you ever need anything just talk to me bro! <3

@terezi-py-rope god i think i staarted following you because we had a homestuck roleplay going on??? still we’ve been mutuals for-fucking-ever and even though you still like it and i look back and sigh its good to see you on my dash. hope you’re doing okay :)

@ugh-heterophobia Hey Sky <3 even though we just broke up and you’re not as active i like seeing you and we go way back <3 im glad we’ve stayed together as long as we have <3

@adorkablooderpy like terezi-py-rope im pretty sure we followed because of hs but ive never had the heart to unfollow and like seeing you on my dash :) 

@howmanyletterscaniputinmyurl first, impressive username. it always makes me chuckle. and we interact sometimes, but its always nice seeing you :)

AAAAAAND thats it. all of my mutuals. i just wanted to let you know i appreciate you all even though some of us never talk and others i am really good friends with. okay im done being sappy now ignore me akhdf

[vikab]

p5 thoughts

After having drawn so much fanart of p5 (most of it being Yusuke) before the game even came out, even with my hype when I started playing on the release date, I only FINALLY finished persona 5 OTL

Below will be my mini-review and thoughts on the game?? spoilers are gonna here on the entire game

Total playtime - 87 hours 40 minutes

OK this is gonna be disorganized mess but i will try to be .. not messy Story: The story unfortunately was very weak :(  Like the game had an AMAZING start and it was tackling really important issues. I really started to care about Ryuji and Ann and their goals. Then Yusuke joins and I thought the game was just heading in perfect direction. Then I felt off during Kaneshiro’s arc as Makoto did not really feel .. really into the whole PT thing?? sorry Makoto fans i love her but she felt rly overrated... anyway Futaba’s arc no doubt was my favorite but then the game really started falling apart. like lets not talk about the whole series of events that were Morgana leaving the team that was straight up BAD. the pacing picked up a bit for the Casino dungeon and it was really intense then its Shido and thing kinda... fell back into this weird pacing ... Ah yes, let’s just wait 20 days to see if Shido has a change of heart or we die. After that the pacing was still all over the place then the huge plottwist happens. I knew about it but still liked it! The last arc had on point emotions and feels so it felt like a good ending to the game.  SEVERE PACING ISSUES KILL THE GAME FOR ME THOUGH.   I get that they still wanted the calendar system but honestly i dont think it worked any huge favors for the game . .. anyway yeah the game started amazing then dropped close to death then picked up again but not as good as the beginning Characters: I have not managed to finish a lot of confidants so near the end the parts where confidants help out it was .. very lacking lol .. . if that part wasnt so depended on the confidants that you have finished.... But overall the characters were good. Pacing of the story and the story itself did not do any justice to them I think and it feels bad bc everyone had so much potential but having a big cast it was obvious that not everyone was getting the attention they deserved Ryuji - good bro and I loved him but the middle part of the game and the constant “we gotta get the girls!” moments were so . . ugh ...  confidant rank and beginning of game ryuji was absolute best though Ann - same goes for her as with ryuji that the beginning of the game was best characterization moment for her. I liked her a lot and she’s pretty bro for female heroine! but the constant fanservice kills me guys Morgana - boy did i dislike morgana for the most of the game. he really felt like teddie 2.0 at times and i just did not have a lot motivation to like him. Last arc of the game tho?? i love morgana??? i wanna cry tbh those parts near the end really resonated with me so my final verdict is that i like morgana a lot now Yusuke - I LOVE THIS BOY. while i get the beef that people have with his recruitment arc (the whole nude modeling thing) I thought it was ok since my interpretation is that he was just pissed and really needed that inspiration he found in ann but idk. otherwise his arc was good but goddamn fuck you atlus for continuously treating him like a weirdo?? PT is supposed to be a gang of misfits and yet even the teammates keep treating him like a weirdo. . that was just really bad like come on  let me kiss yusuke and feed him. also will never forgive atlus for not letting yusuke move into leblanc. He’s a very good character and very level-headed so i love him sm. he has really great moments Makoto - I liked her a lot! i do think she’s a bit overrated and that she doesn’t fit well with PT but I think that’s just the issue with Atlus pacing of the story, because her issues during her recruitment were really good (as in i did feel like she would fit into PT well) Futaba - I LOVE THIS GIRL!! I played with jpn dub which I think does much better justice to her characterization. Her entire arc was so so good and I felt like she was a really solid character going through growth. her confidant was very very good. She has a lot of funny moments and I love her antics with Yusuke. they are the blessed characters of this game. too good for this game. Haru - love her too!!!! she was so nice and sweet but damn atlus did not do her justice at all. she is the “last” party member to join and it is so sad she does not get a lof interaction with PT. like I wish PT interacted with her somehow throughout the game before she joins, be it like help her out sometimes or something bc they go to same school so when she joins later the team dynamic can easily accept her. Goro - we dont talk about goro jk but honestly he was handled bad. his link was automatic and I get why but his initial personality just makes me hate him a lot. he was cool as a party member but not for long. I expect him to appear in spinoffs bc wtf was that ending for him goddamn atlus. i like a lot his potential as a character but everything else? hate Sae was for me quite funny during the interrogation (when you start the confidant parts) but after her casino her involvement in the story I really ended up liking Sae. she’s good Also gonna mention Sojiro bc i love that coffee dad. His dynamic with Futaba and protagonist was extremely good!!! such a solid family. I loved that he finds out the truth and how he handled it. love u sojiro Speaking of protagonist, I really really really wish atlus would ease up on the “silent protagonist” a bit more. for a game as huge as this, the silence does not do justice to the protagonist. idk i just wish there would have been a bit more voice to him and solid characterization other than some off-hand comments that imply the underlying personality. i get the whole “self-insert” part but it sucks stop putting it in games Overall character summary: pacing sucked so characterization suffered a lot. a lot of characters don’t get their time to shine and while I love them a lot it really sucks to see how they were treated. Pacing ruined a lot of things including team dynamic. Palaces: (in chronological order) Kamoshida/Castle - IT SUCKED I HATE IT. being the first freaking dungeon it sure was extremely hard and damn long. also not knowing about the calling car system really hurt lmao. i just hate this dungeon and i got stuck there a lot too Madarame/Art Museum - THE BEST ONE! Honestly I think it is the only palace that really did feel like a heist! It is a very beautiful palace and im probably also biased bc its Yusuke’s arc but this palace was legit fun to get through. Kaneshiro/Bank - it was ok, good music. i don’t really feel much for it and I was just mostly annoyed how long the vault part was. Futaba/Pyramid - I loved it  a lot too! 10/10 music I had a lot of annoyances with coffin shadows and the puzzles for a bit but overall the music and aesthetics really made the palace work well with the story Okumura/Spaceship - we don’t talk about the “lunch break” parts.... overall it was ok and I liked its aesthetic. also the implications about the workers there was good sad material. Sae/Casino - 10/10 music. overall i disliked it a lot bc some of the parts really dragged and I hated gambling in there to progress. Shido/Ship - 10/10 music. overall i liked it / it was ok. the mouse mechanic was a bit fun, the last part being ... 3 boss fights in a row without saving was sure something. 10/10 creepy outside aesthetic of sunken city. Mementos Depths - not to be confused w/ p3/4 style dungeon we know as mementos (which were pretty much mindless fun to progress thru), the depths was ... so good. mostly for the creepy aesthetic 10/10 would suffer again. the music track Freedom and Security, that plays during goro’s bad end credits, plays as the theme for this dungeon and jeez did it make me feel so emo. the parts where you can talk to locked up people who are apathetic to the world just gave me depression and i loved it.. . i didnt really like the later part of it (when tokyo merges with mementos) To rank the palaces overall its:  Art museum > Mementos Depths > Pyramid >> Ruse Cruise > Spaceship > Casino > Bank >>>>>> Castle Gameplay mechanics were very solid and fun. Movement a bit could be clunky (or that’s what i felt like) and stealth mechanic in dungeons was ok. The gameplay has A LOT of attention to detail and i appreciated it a lot. UI was cluttered but it worked and was quite Aesthetic. I think the game would have benefited if the stats weren’t so important to the social aspect or if the calendar system was revamped. Final boss imo was not as bad as P4 but still ... sucked. P3′s final boss fight is still ultimately my favorite. P5 comes close but once again, pacing issues. Protagonist summoning freaking Satanael was cool af though. Honestly my big issue with P5 was the PACING that made the story and characters suck a lot of times but overall the game was extremely solid and memorable.  Of the persona entries i played i think P5 is special so I can’t really rank it. I am really attached to the game despite its heavy flaws that kill me. P3 and P2 are still quite my favorites but P5 is like really close to them so I guess it’s a fave too i love those phantom thieves

[shemakesmusic-uk]

Getting to Know...

I The Victor.

Self-proclaimed positivity project I The Victor returns with alternative pop single ‘Hypotheticals’, after supporting Vinyl Theatre and playing multiple dates on the Vans Warped Tour.

I The Victor hit the ground running in 2018 with a co-headlining tour with alt-rockers The Orphan The Poet, direct support shows with Vesperteen and support from Alt Press but 2019 is where the solo project is truly coming into its own, starting with the release of ‘Hypotheticals’.

With hints of Lorde and The 1975, I The Victor is the birthchild of Atlanta’s Rebecca Ramos. Built on silver linings and positive perspectives, I The Victor is based on the branding of ‘Staying Posi’, with the aim to help others with every song released.

We had a quick chat with Rebecca about 'Hypotheticals', her journey so far, Stay Posi and more. Read the Q&A below.

2018 was an incredible year for you! Please tell us a bit about your journey as an artist so far and what you hope to achieve this year.

“Thanks so much, yeah it was an exciting year! I started ITV in late 2015 with an EP, then I really started pursuing music more heavily and writing a style of music I really believed in in late 2017, so 2018 was kind of the year I got to do exactly what I'd been working towards and creating. We also toured a lot and played with some amazing bands like Set It Off, Vinyl Theatre, Vesperteen and more; it was just great to be on the road and taking these songs directly to people and working hard to earn them as fans and members of this community ITV is building. At the end of the year we released ‘Tongue & Stutter’ which was our biggest song yet and two weeks ago we release ‘Hypotheticals’ which is on pace to reach even more people than ‘Tongue & Stutter’. So yeah! It's just a super exciting time and I've fallen in love with the process of being an independent artist and working as hard as I can to get these songs to new places! This year we have a lot more music, visuals and I'm sure we'll be touring as well, so all I can really hope is that we keep meeting new people who enjoy the music and keep ITV going in a really cool direction.”

Speaking of 'Hypotheticals'. What is the track about?

“’Hypotheticals’ is about thinking too much and about making the decisions that you know are right for you, but still having a ton of overthink and second guessing in that process of doing what's right for yourself. It's interesting to me emotionally since the lyrics are so divided - half of me is proud and certain of doing the right thing and half of me is scared and anxious of change or feels sorry for probably hurting the person I needed to let go of. But I think that duality is really real in any tough decision so that's kind of where ‘Hypotheticals’ came from.”

What inspired the video for 'Hypotheticals?'

“We tried to really showcase this analysis paralysis state; how sometimes you can think so much about a situation - real or imagined - that you can freeze up effectively create this non-solution to the problem because you're so overthinking that you can't will yourself to get moving and fix it. Then towards the end, my whole day is reimagined from a state where I'm not so anguished with 'what ifs' and things begin going just as you'd expect rather than going array. For me the whole narrative is just that, perhaps on the other side of overthinking or assuming the worst outcome, you can think 'what if it goes really well or just as it should'? And, while that's not my constant state, it's certainly a less taxing one than fearing for the worst and its a mindset I try to remind myself to be in.”

Please tell us all about Stay Posi. What inspired you to want to write music to help other people?

“The goal has always been to get these songs to as many people as possible, but I started with just writing songs that I needed for a certain time in my life. And I think, because I write them so first-person, they can end up being helpful to others. I think, essentially, we're all in the same boat just pivoting through change or navigating growth and progress. All that.  ITV has kind of provided this banner to talk about anything I need to through as hopeful a lens as possible. So 'stay posi' kind of stems from that space of being hopeful regardless of circumstance and not pretending that problems dont exist, but being able to turn to music or art and be comforted in knowing you're not alone, knowing that things get better and having hope in the midst of heaviness, which is a theme in a lot of my songs.”

Are there any new bands or artists that are having an influence on your music/sound right now? Or any you think we should check out?

“We played with an amazing band called DBMK this past summer. I really love their sound and think they're going to do some amazing things. Definitely check them out! Chelsea Shag is another totally amazing artist out of Atlanta as well doing something super fresh and unique so definitely check her out too! And then some of my personal favorite artists or influences recently have been Hippo Campus, Maggie Rogers, Jaden Smith, The Japanese House and a bunch more.”

We will!

‘Hypotheticals’ is out now.

[symbianosgames]

Game Design Deep Dive is an ongoing Gamasutra series with the goal of shedding light on specific design features or mechanics within a video game, in order to show how seemingly simple, fundamental design decisions aren't really that simple at all.

Check out earlier installments, including the action-based RPG battles in Undertale, using a real human skull for the audio of Inside, and the realistic chat system of Mr. Robot:1.51exfiltrati0n. 

I’m Peter Ilves, one of the co-founders of Stunlock Studios and the Game Director on Battlerite, as well as Stunlock's previous titles Dead Island: Epidemic (Epidemic) and Bloodline Champions (BLC).

I would best describe my role as a wild combination of a producer, game designer, and programmer. I started my career by studying game design at the University of Skövde in Sweden back in 2006. I eventually made some friends at university and together we created a game as part of a development-course. This project eventually turned into Bloodline Champions (BLC) and me and 13 other students that developed the game founded Stunlock Studios.

Battlerite is the spiritual successor to Bloodline Champions, a team arena brawler that is best described as a mashup between World of Warcraft Arena and a traditional fighting game.

[embedded content]

As I’m writing this, Battlerite has been out for less than 3 weeks in Early Access and have already reached an audience of 250 000+ players.

At its core Battlerite shares a lot of the DNA of BLC. We determined that the lack of success of BLC was partly due to factors outside the game itself and partly due to the game not being approachable enough. These include: 

Getting into the game was too hard

Business model didn't work well with the core design of the game

Weak server-infrastructure

Not enough resources for community management

Stunlock Studio's Battlerite.

Bloodlines Champions was a passion project. A group of 14 students coming together to create the best possible arena game out there. Our ambitions were sky-high: a PvP Game with a dedicated server network and a focus on eSport long before the eSports scene exploded. With almost no budget, we started developing everything from our own graphics engine to our own network-solutions. Personal loans and people working with “real” jobs on the side funded the project.

Late in the process, we signed a publishing deal with Funcom that enabled us to eventually launch the game. BLC is an extremely hardcore game but it was critically acclaimed and we managed to build a small but dedicated community.

We received our first paychecks and continued to update the game post launch with new content and new features but BLC never really took off. After more than a year of struggling with making the game fly people were starting to lose confidence and eventually we had to move on to stay alive as a studio.

We were able to sign a deal with Deep Silver and started working on zombie-slasher Dead Island: Epidemic. Everyone was super excited and for the years to come there were very little talk about BLC.

Dead Island: Epidemic was eventually canceled. Having a game canceled after 2½ years into production was frustrating but at the same time, I think it was a relief for many. It had been a stressful project and in the end, it was a work for hire. 

Dead Island: Epidemic

I remember how we sat down with the studio, asking everyone what he or she wanted to do next. I was surprised by the result; we had not talked a lot about BLC during Epidemic but all of a sudden, everyone wanted to do a remake. Everyone still believed in the core values of BLC and what we started back in 2008.

Nothing similar had come up on the market over the years; nothing remotely similar to BLC at least, and we believed there to be a spot on the market for our type of game.

Everyone was aboard, and we were confident that as long as we can make this game on our own conditions we could make it into the best arena PvP game out there. We would not let a publisher hijack this project and thanks to our friends and investors at Coffee Stain Studios, we were able to develop the game on our own terms.

I believe Battlerite’s success is down to the following key points.

1. We knew exactly what we wanted to accomplish

When working on BLC we experimented with different types of gameplay, movement, game modes and so on. We did not really know what game we were making to begin with. For Battlerite we wanted to keep it straightforward, easy and approachable.

We took the core of BLC and decided to stick with that for the entire project. Focus on the Arena and the Champions, nothing else. Instead of investing resources into trying out new game mode ideas or trying to create new types of Champions, we took the best pieces from BLC and iterated, iterated and iterated.

Bloodline Champions

2. Zero Iteration Downtime

As we knew we were going to have an extremely iterative process we set a technical goal from day 1 – Zero Iteration downtime. This was a design goal that permeated every part of our content pipelines.

The toolset we have used to develop Battlerite is built from scratch for this project. We are using Unity as our render-engine while gameplay related elements as collision, network, AI, are all custom-made. We have developed a tool with the fancy name “Game Tool” in which we basically create the entire game.

The Game Tool is used to define objects, constant data, stateful data that change during gameplay, references to graphical assets and scripts as well as relationships between objects. Scripts are attached to objects and can then access the data and state for those objects dynamically, with changes to all of these available instantly without restarting. Scripts are compiled on save, constant & state data is changed in the running gameplay process as they’re made. 

We embed a standalone Unity player process into a Game Tool window that we feed with the game state for rendering. Artists import assets (models, SFX, particles, animations) into a separate Unity editor project where they’re immediately built into bundles and made available for usage in the Game Tool and its embedded Unity process. Artists and coders can add content in an incremental fashion without having to restart, reload or compile unrelated assets or code, which we believe is key to our iteration process. Iterate, save, test, iterate.

Without this toolset, we would never have been able to create the Look and Feel that we aspired to when we set out.

3. Look and Feel

When comparing BLC and Battlerite the difference in visual quality and presentation is obvious. What is not as apparent but maybe even more important is how different the game feels. This has been one of the biggest challenge to us marketing-wise. The game looks like a RTS MOBA but once you get your hands on it you understand the vast differences.

Controlling your Champion with WASD movement is a huge difference and we’ve put a ton of effort into getting the gameplay feel just right. A video cannot sell you on that feeling. We ended up branding it as a Team Arena Brawler (TAB), basically creating our own genre.

This is the biggest improvement when comparing both games. Moving around, striking down your enemy, firing your guns, charging into combat. These are just a few mechanics in the game but we have worked so much on making them feel smooth and satisfying to pull off. 

BLC has a more “choppy” feel to it, every time you use an ability you have to stand still to perform the action while in Battlerite we’ve tried to make combat more fluent. Many attacks allow you to move while using them and every attack has individual settings for how much it affects your movement. How much your champion slows down, different timers for acceleration/deceleration, different amount of post-attack time before you can perform a new action. It certainly has similarities to a fighting game.

As a player you probably will not even reflect on these settings but when balanced correctly it creates a very satisfying flow. This along with the many improvements in presentation (art-style, HUD, animations, SFX & VFX) makes the game more approachable and attractive.

[embedded content]

4. Servers & Net code

BLC is a very latency dependent game and we did not have the server infrastructure to support it. Many players were unable to enjoy the game because they resided too far away from our server locations.

Supporting BLC with a good server infrastructure was however not our obligations at that time. We had signed a publishing agreement and this area of responsibility was on the publisher's side.

With Battlerite we’ve been able to support the game with a worldwide state of the art server solution. We are fortunate to have had the chance to work with great partners that have enabled us to launch the game on a global scale already during Early Access.

When BLC launched we had one server in central Europe and one server in US East and that was it. These are the server options for Battlerite, 3 weeks into Early Access:

Battlerite's current server selection.

Beside server infrastructure, we have also put a lot of effort into optimizing and developing solid net code. With 7 years of experience working on top-down multiplayer games, we had a good understanding of how we wanted to develop the net-code for Battlerite. 

Our goal from the start has been to make Battlerite available to as many as possible. For the netcode, this meant being able to handle a large variety of network environments like high packet loss, highly variable latency as well as just constant high latency. In BLC, the netcode would fall over if a player had even slight packet loss and it wasn't a great experience to play with more than 100ms latency. In Battlerite, a large amount of systems are designed around the reality of networks around the world.

Our current server infrastructure and a more refined net-code is probably the second biggest reason for the success of Battlerite, especially in regions with developing infrastructure.

5. Pricing

BLC launched as a Free-2-Play game with a similar business model as League of Legends. There was a free champion rotation system. Players were able unlock new champions by earning and spending virtual currency and you could purchase a champion or a bundle of champions for real money.

What we realized too late was that this model was fundamentally flawed for a game like BLC. A MOBA free-2-play model did not sit well with a game like BLC. BLC is all about the champions while I would argue that a MOBA is more about the game mode. By limiting access to Champions we made an already content-thin game even smaller. New players could pick up one of four champions and would ultimately face other players with the same champions as everyone had the same rotation.

It grew stale and repetitive very quickly and players quit early as the grind for a new champion was too big.

The Battlerite Early Access grants you access to all champions as well as all future champions for $20. We have not yet decided what model we will use when the game fully launches but know what we want to avoid.

I’d say that our current price-point is a great deal. It is also worth considering how players will react to how you price your game and what reputation you want to build as a studio. We have been taking a few hits over the years due to the pricing of both BLC and Epidemic. Pricing of some items in those games have been on a ridiculous scale but those decisions were often out of our hands.

With Battlerite we are independent and we can right some wrongs from the past and rebuild some trust. A fair pricing model goes a long way in that regards.

6. Community

With BLC we tried hard to build a strong community. At that time, we were still 14 people developing our first multiplayer PvP game and we still took time aside to create webpages, we developed and branded our own community forums, we hosted community events and tried our best with the limited resources we had to stay active with the community.

Many people in the studio felt that we let everyone down when we weren't able to keep this up due to both political and economical reasons.

With Epidemic it was easier. We were actually not allowed to interact with our players via forums or other media. This is another story of course but one of those interesting aspects of working with a publisher. The good side of this was that we had more time developing the game and we were less emotionally attached to the community (which was a good thing for us when Epidemic was canceled).

For Battlerite we are solely responsible for building our community and this time around there are no political reasons keeping us away from our players. We believe in transparency and as we are still a small team (25 people) everyone that can and wants to is able to help out. Answering posts on forums, doing write-ups that explains a features or a decision, helping with support and so on.

Everyone in the studio is allowed to talk to our community. This sometimes results in miscommunications (especially in language as we only have one native English-speaking person in the office) but so far the positive side far outweighs the negative side of this approach.

During our launch week, most people in the studio spent almost all their time helping people out that had technical issues, answering questions on forums and streams and relayed important topics to our coders so we could fix it ASAP.

There are always unforeseen technical issues that will occur once you get a lot of people into your game but we were prepared for it and communicated any issue directly via our in-game messaging system. During the launch week we worked around the clock and I think our ability to respond and fix issues quickly were very much appreciated by our community.

I would say that the most important part about developing Battlerite has been our team spirit and production mindset. We’re constantly iterating on our processes and refining our toolsets to enable everyone to work as efficiently as possible.   Throughout the project we have been comparing ourselves with the biggest competitive games and we never settled for less. We didn’t have the manpower to create this type of game with the level of quality we desired. We had to come up with solutions that enabled us to work as efficiently as possible. Not only am I proud of the game but I’m proud of the toolset and pipelines we’ve developed.   Iterating on a game can be tedious and I think that’s why many settle with mediocre results. Perfecting small variable differences within a game can be very time-consuming if you don’t have the right processes. When you have powerful tools it’s more fun to work and you never end up asking yourself if a change is worth the time investment or not, you just do it. 

In the end, I believe that the commercial success of Battlerite is mostly due to how much better we were able to realize the game on our second try. Battlerite is the result of 8 years of iteration, iteration and iteration on a top-down action multiplayer game.  

[symbianosgames]

Game Design Deep Dive is an ongoing Gamasutra series with the goal of shedding light on specific design features or mechanics within a video game, in order to show how seemingly simple, fundamental design decisions aren't really that simple at all.

Check out earlier installments, including the action-based RPG battles in Undertale, using a real human skull for the audio of Inside, and the realistic chat system of Mr. Robot:1.51exfiltrati0n. 

I’m Peter Ilves, one of the co-founders of Stunlock Studios and the Game Director on Battlerite, as well as Stunlock's previous titles Dead Island: Epidemic (Epidemic) and Bloodline Champions (BLC).

I would best describe my role as a wild combination of a producer, game designer, and programmer. I started my career by studying game design at the University of Skövde in Sweden back in 2006. I eventually made some friends at university and together we created a game as part of a development-course. This project eventually turned into Bloodline Champions (BLC) and me and 13 other students that developed the game founded Stunlock Studios.

Battlerite is the spiritual successor to Bloodline Champions, a team arena brawler that is best described as a mashup between World of Warcraft Arena and a traditional fighting game.

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As I’m writing this, Battlerite has been out for less than 3 weeks in Early Access and have already reached an audience of 250 000+ players.

At its core Battlerite shares a lot of the DNA of BLC. We determined that the lack of success of BLC was partly due to factors outside the game itself and partly due to the game not being approachable enough. These include: 

Getting into the game was too hard

Business model didn't work well with the core design of the game

Weak server-infrastructure

Not enough resources for community management

Stunlock Studio's Battlerite.

Bloodlines Champions was a passion project. A group of 14 students coming together to create the best possible arena game out there. Our ambitions were sky-high: a PvP Game with a dedicated server network and a focus on eSport long before the eSports scene exploded. With almost no budget, we started developing everything from our own graphics engine to our own network-solutions. Personal loans and people working with “real” jobs on the side funded the project.

Late in the process, we signed a publishing deal with Funcom that enabled us to eventually launch the game. BLC is an extremely hardcore game but it was critically acclaimed and we managed to build a small but dedicated community.

We received our first paychecks and continued to update the game post launch with new content and new features but BLC never really took off. After more than a year of struggling with making the game fly people were starting to lose confidence and eventually we had to move on to stay alive as a studio.

We were able to sign a deal with Deep Silver and started working on zombie-slasher Dead Island: Epidemic. Everyone was super excited and for the years to come there were very little talk about BLC.

Dead Island: Epidemic was eventually canceled. Having a game canceled after 2½ years into production was frustrating but at the same time, I think it was a relief for many. It had been a stressful project and in the end, it was a work for hire. 

Dead Island: Epidemic

I remember how we sat down with the studio, asking everyone what he or she wanted to do next. I was surprised by the result; we had not talked a lot about BLC during Epidemic but all of a sudden, everyone wanted to do a remake. Everyone still believed in the core values of BLC and what we started back in 2008.

Nothing similar had come up on the market over the years; nothing remotely similar to BLC at least, and we believed there to be a spot on the market for our type of game.

Everyone was aboard, and we were confident that as long as we can make this game on our own conditions we could make it into the best arena PvP game out there. We would not let a publisher hijack this project and thanks to our friends and investors at Coffee Stain Studios, we were able to develop the game on our own terms.

I believe Battlerite’s success is down to the following key points.

1. We knew exactly what we wanted to accomplish

When working on BLC we experimented with different types of gameplay, movement, game modes and so on. We did not really know what game we were making to begin with. For Battlerite we wanted to keep it straightforward, easy and approachable.

We took the core of BLC and decided to stick with that for the entire project. Focus on the Arena and the Champions, nothing else. Instead of investing resources into trying out new game mode ideas or trying to create new types of Champions, we took the best pieces from BLC and iterated, iterated and iterated.

Bloodline Champions

2. Zero Iteration Downtime

As we knew we were going to have an extremely iterative process we set a technical goal from day 1 – Zero Iteration downtime. This was a design goal that permeated every part of our content pipelines.

The toolset we have used to develop Battlerite is built from scratch for this project. We are using Unity as our render-engine while gameplay related elements as collision, network, AI, are all custom-made. We have developed a tool with the fancy name “Game Tool” in which we basically create the entire game.

The Game Tool is used to define objects, constant data, stateful data that change during gameplay, references to graphical assets and scripts as well as relationships between objects. Scripts are attached to objects and can then access the data and state for those objects dynamically, with changes to all of these available instantly without restarting. Scripts are compiled on save, constant & state data is changed in the running gameplay process as they’re made. 

We embed a standalone Unity player process into a Game Tool window that we feed with the game state for rendering. Artists import assets (models, SFX, particles, animations) into a separate Unity editor project where they’re immediately built into bundles and made available for usage in the Game Tool and its embedded Unity process. Artists and coders can add content in an incremental fashion without having to restart, reload or compile unrelated assets or code, which we believe is key to our iteration process. Iterate, save, test, iterate.

Without this toolset, we would never have been able to create the Look and Feel that we aspired to when we set out.

3. Look and Feel

When comparing BLC and Battlerite the difference in visual quality and presentation is obvious. What is not as apparent but maybe even more important is how different the game feels. This has been one of the biggest challenge to us marketing-wise. The game looks like a RTS MOBA but once you get your hands on it you understand the vast differences.

Controlling your Champion with WASD movement is a huge difference and we’ve put a ton of effort into getting the gameplay feel just right. A video cannot sell you on that feeling. We ended up branding it as a Team Arena Brawler (TAB), basically creating our own genre.

This is the biggest improvement when comparing both games. Moving around, striking down your enemy, firing your guns, charging into combat. These are just a few mechanics in the game but we have worked so much on making them feel smooth and satisfying to pull off. 

BLC has a more “choppy” feel to it, every time you use an ability you have to stand still to perform the action while in Battlerite we’ve tried to make combat more fluent. Many attacks allow you to move while using them and every attack has individual settings for how much it affects your movement. How much your champion slows down, different timers for acceleration/deceleration, different amount of post-attack time before you can perform a new action. It certainly has similarities to a fighting game.

As a player you probably will not even reflect on these settings but when balanced correctly it creates a very satisfying flow. This along with the many improvements in presentation (art-style, HUD, animations, SFX & VFX) makes the game more approachable and attractive.

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4. Servers & Net code

BLC is a very latency dependent game and we did not have the server infrastructure to support it. Many players were unable to enjoy the game because they resided too far away from our server locations.

Supporting BLC with a good server infrastructure was however not our obligations at that time. We had signed a publishing agreement and this area of responsibility was on the publisher's side.

With Battlerite we’ve been able to support the game with a worldwide state of the art server solution. We are fortunate to have had the chance to work with great partners that have enabled us to launch the game on a global scale already during Early Access.

When BLC launched we had one server in central Europe and one server in US East and that was it. These are the server options for Battlerite, 3 weeks into Early Access:

Battlerite's current server selection.

Beside server infrastructure, we have also put a lot of effort into optimizing and developing solid net code. With 7 years of experience working on top-down multiplayer games, we had a good understanding of how we wanted to develop the net-code for Battlerite. 

Our goal from the start has been to make Battlerite available to as many as possible. For the netcode, this meant being able to handle a large variety of network environments like high packet loss, highly variable latency as well as just constant high latency. In BLC, the netcode would fall over if a player had even slight packet loss and it wasn't a great experience to play with more than 100ms latency. In Battlerite, a large amount of systems are designed around the reality of networks around the world.

Our current server infrastructure and a more refined net-code is probably the second biggest reason for the success of Battlerite, especially in regions with developing infrastructure.

5. Pricing

BLC launched as a Free-2-Play game with a similar business model as League of Legends. There was a free champion rotation system. Players were able unlock new champions by earning and spending virtual currency and you could purchase a champion or a bundle of champions for real money.

What we realized too late was that this model was fundamentally flawed for a game like BLC. A MOBA free-2-play model did not sit well with a game like BLC. BLC is all about the champions while I would argue that a MOBA is more about the game mode. By limiting access to Champions we made an already content-thin game even smaller. New players could pick up one of four champions and would ultimately face other players with the same champions as everyone had the same rotation.

It grew stale and repetitive very quickly and players quit early as the grind for a new champion was too big.

The Battlerite Early Access grants you access to all champions as well as all future champions for $20. We have not yet decided what model we will use when the game fully launches but know what we want to avoid.

I’d say that our current price-point is a great deal. It is also worth considering how players will react to how you price your game and what reputation you want to build as a studio. We have been taking a few hits over the years due to the pricing of both BLC and Epidemic. Pricing of some items in those games have been on a ridiculous scale but those decisions were often out of our hands.

With Battlerite we are independent and we can right some wrongs from the past and rebuild some trust. A fair pricing model goes a long way in that regards.

6. Community

With BLC we tried hard to build a strong community. At that time, we were still 14 people developing our first multiplayer PvP game and we still took time aside to create webpages, we developed and branded our own community forums, we hosted community events and tried our best with the limited resources we had to stay active with the community.

Many people in the studio felt that we let everyone down when we weren't able to keep this up due to both political and economical reasons.

With Epidemic it was easier. We were actually not allowed to interact with our players via forums or other media. This is another story of course but one of those interesting aspects of working with a publisher. The good side of this was that we had more time developing the game and we were less emotionally attached to the community (which was a good thing for us when Epidemic was canceled).

For Battlerite we are solely responsible for building our community and this time around there are no political reasons keeping us away from our players. We believe in transparency and as we are still a small team (25 people) everyone that can and wants to is able to help out. Answering posts on forums, doing write-ups that explains a features or a decision, helping with support and so on.

Everyone in the studio is allowed to talk to our community. This sometimes results in miscommunications (especially in language as we only have one native English-speaking person in the office) but so far the positive side far outweighs the negative side of this approach.

During our launch week, most people in the studio spent almost all their time helping people out that had technical issues, answering questions on forums and streams and relayed important topics to our coders so we could fix it ASAP.

There are always unforeseen technical issues that will occur once you get a lot of people into your game but we were prepared for it and communicated any issue directly via our in-game messaging system. During the launch week we worked around the clock and I think our ability to respond and fix issues quickly were very much appreciated by our community.

I would say that the most important part about developing Battlerite has been our team spirit and production mindset. We’re constantly iterating on our processes and refining our toolsets to enable everyone to work as efficiently as possible.   Throughout the project we have been comparing ourselves with the biggest competitive games and we never settled for less. We didn’t have the manpower to create this type of game with the level of quality we desired. We had to come up with solutions that enabled us to work as efficiently as possible. Not only am I proud of the game but I’m proud of the toolset and pipelines we’ve developed.   Iterating on a game can be tedious and I think that’s why many settle with mediocre results. Perfecting small variable differences within a game can be very time-consuming if you don’t have the right processes. When you have powerful tools it’s more fun to work and you never end up asking yourself if a change is worth the time investment or not, you just do it. 

In the end, I believe that the commercial success of Battlerite is mostly due to how much better we were able to realize the game on our second try. Battlerite is the result of 8 years of iteration, iteration and iteration on a top-down action multiplayer game.