#we are gonna get to watch lucifers descent

[madokakanamereal]

'I will go with hope

Hope will go with you

The miracle that I achieved with you

Will surely guide us'

(from the new walpurgis rising trailer)

[eggsyfired]

I just finished making an animatic about Haymitch w the song “Bug Like an Angel” by Mitski, but Alight Motion is being fucking stupid and won't let me export shit. So in the meantime I’m gonna be breaking down the lyrics of the song and how it connects back to everyone’s favorite sad clown.

There's a bug like an angel stuck to the bottom of my glass with a little bit left

If we wanna follow the religious themes of this song, this could connect to Lucifer, a fallen angel, and the singer. They were both good and well-adjusted people, but became gross and bad or smth after “falling into temptation” (in the singer's case, becoming addicted to alcohol). Haymitch is a very smart dude and could've had a good life, especially with the influence given to him as a victor, but having gone through some insane trauma, he became a joke and “screw up” instead. Also I drew this part of the animatic with a bug literally being in the drink instead of under the glass like Mitski intended lol. 

As I got older I learned I’m a drinker. Sometimes a drink feels like family 

In my HC, Haymitch's descent into crippling alcoholism sort of crept up to him throughout a long span of time instead of the usual “diving head first into a sea of alcohol the moment his family dies” thing I see a lot of people portray it as. He’d try to deny he’s an addict, but as he grows older and his addiction becomes debilitating, he accepts it. He does jackshit about it tho because drinking and being drunk brings him comfort, probably a similar sense of comfort that his (you guessed it) family or community brought. The lyric could also be referring to the singer’s family being prone to addiction, and since I’ve got a HC that Haymitch’s alcoholism was hereditary (cuz why not), it also fits really well with this interpretation in mind.

Hey, what's the matter? Looking like your sticker is stuck on a floor somewhere.

As a kid, Mitski was a huge sticker collector, and the thought of her beloved stickers being abandoned and mistreated on a random floor made her feel sad. A mitski-less interpretation is the singer's heart or even the singer itself being the sticker, getting stuck in a place where they’re getting hurt. Again, both interpretations fit Haymitch. For the former, it relates to him by how he cared about his community, so watching them die every year in horrible, brutal ways made him feel a little sad to say the least. For the latter, it relates to him in the way he’s stuck being a mentor, watching kids he’s expected to look after die year after year.

Did you go and make promises you can't keep? Well, when you break them, they break you right back

This is my fav, mostly cuz this can have 3 completely different meanings if you see this song with him in mind.  1. the original meaning, aka swearing to be sober but end up relapsing, making the singer feel like dookie 2: Haymitch “promising” the loved ones of his tributes that he’ll bring them home, only for them to be consistently killed off. The responsibility of so many lives and families weighs on him, and it makes him feel hella guilty for letting so many people down. If you wanna get hella angsty, maybe D12 felt the same. They thought Haymitch could be a huge help to bring more kids back home compared to the 40 years of D12 tributes not having a mentor, but he couldn't, and it makes some people resent him, making him feel even MORE shitty!! 3: Here’s my favorite version: HIS PROMISE TO KATNISS AND PEETA!! He promised that he’d save one of them over the other, especially swearing to Katniss that he’d prioritize Peeta. In the end, he couldn't and saved Katniss instead because she’s a more popular figurehead for the rebellion. It obliterated his relationship w Katniss for a while, and I can imagine it fucked Haymitch up too that he couldn't save his precious bread boy. I can probably go for another hour defending Haymitch over this decision, but that’s another yap sesh for another time!!!

When I’m bent over wishing it was over—making a variety of vows I’ll never keep—I try to remember the wrath of the devil was also given him by God.

This lyric has 2 meanings. 1) the singer’s suffering is part of God's plan to make them more resilient and 2) God is being a dick and screwing them over so there's really no point in begging. And guess what? BOTH MEANINGS APPLY LOL I’ll start off with the latter. God in this case is the government, especially Snow, since he has a similar kind of power that God holds. Haymitch believes that all his misery is unending, unstoppable, and meaningless, so there's really no point in being optimistic. He should just lie down and wait for liver failure to take its course. THEN Katniss and Peeta come along, which flips his entire world upside down. This could connect with the optimistic interpretation. Haymitch’s 23 years as a victor were given meaning because of how integral they were to the rebellion. Maybe K&P had to show up at just the right time for their impact to be its greatest and for the rebellion to spark (timing that God would have planned), so all that waiting around and suffering was worth it. Haymitch probably doesn't know who tf God is anyway but it's still a fun thought.

In conclusion, Suzanne Collins possessed Mitski in her sleep to write a song about Haymitch and only I’ve been able to decode it because I’m obsessed with him and Mitski’s music in equally deranged levels. Y’all should listen to the song btw its great. Honestly, it took me a couple listens to warm up to it but it really is one of my favorite Mitski songs :>

Yk what while we're in the subject of Mitski songs that fits Haymitch, here's a quick list of songs (which aren't necessarily made by Mitski) I associate w that guy

I Bet on Losing Dogs- Not as well as Bug Like an Angel ofc, but if you view the losing dogs as Haymitch's tributes then shit makes sense a lot more.

Cool About It (Boygenius)- HAYFFIE and a bit of Chaffnathy! I accidentally wrote an essay so maybe I'll make another post yapping about this song, but just know that the 1st verse is Chaff's, the 2nd is Haymitch's, and the 3rd is Effie's.

Over and Over (Rio Romeo) and Alcoholic Friends (the Dresden Dolls)- Both about addiction again, so naturally its Haymitch's song now lol

[maribabyart]

Do you have any Demon Martha headcanons? How do you think her reunion with Mrs. Mayberry (The teacher who paid for her assassination) in hell would go?

 OK YES I HAVE HEADCANONS FOR THIS HERE WE GO --

MARTHA HEADCANONS <3

So, I’m gonna start with her before she died so I can fully get into why every part of her is the way she is as a demon.

Martha is light skinned Latina woman with family coming from Venezuela. Her mother has a much darker skin tone than her, but her father is far more light-skinned, where she gets her complexion from. While she was raised in America, her parents were immigrants. She was born at home, and she didn’t get a birth certificate until she was four, the year before she started schooling.

She has three older brothers. They were very rambunctious with Martha as a child, pulling pranks on her/with her, taking her hunting, etc.

She was raised out on a farm in the middle of a forested area in Kentucky. They raised cattle, sheep, chickens, and horses. Martha’s main job on the farm was to groom/ride horses and feed chickens.

She learned her sharp-shooter skills in a more intense version of something like 4H unique to her area. She was fantastic with a bow and arrow, and even better with her firearms.

Cannibalism was normalized in Martha’s life from a young age. She knew that it must be kept secret from the outside world, and that it wasn’t accepted. However, it wasn’t something she found to be horrid.

Her family -- and their close friends -- came from a long lineage of Satanic cultists that practiced cannibalism to purge any bit of, “soul” remaining in the corpses of their sacrifices. Due to this, Martha had evolved to be able to be immune to the ill side effects of cannibalism, along with the ability to not feel repulsed by the idea of eating human meat.

Her favorite part of the body growing up was the brain, and it still is to this day. She loves the frontal lobe slathered in spices and hot sauce.

She began her cultish killings at age fourteen, when she officially joined the cult of her family’s descent -- Compañerismo de la Fruta Prohibida (Fellowship of the Forbidden Fruit, a refrence to their following of Lucifer)

Martha didn’t love Raphael Peterson, or, “Ralphie”. She was married of to him at age sixteen, when she became a, “Woman” in the cult’s eyes. They were both meant to appear as an ideal couple so that people wouldn’t suspect them, as their parents before them have.

Ralph and Martha always saw each other as friends with benefits.

They moved to Dayton, Tennessee to start their family when they turned eighteen.

In Nashville, Martha started singing to music her husband played in Taverns. Think Dolly Parton style music. She sounded a lot like that.

Their first child was born when Martha was eighteen: Their daughter, Jolene Peterson. Two years later, they had their son, Beau Peterson.

Martha was always really involved with her kids’ school activities, and she was always volunteering to work events, and her kids were in every activity they could be.

She used her physical attractiveness to seduce and kill men.

While sex favorable, Martha is on the aspec -- greysexual (sexual pleasure is irrelevant to her, and she only engages in it to appease her partner generally. She only finds sexual attraction in people while in the act.) Because of this fact, Martha only has affairs for the sake of gaining trust to bring the men home so they can be killed and eaten.

When Martha was shot, the community villainized Mrs. Mayberry because the town darling, Martha Jane Nunez Robles-Peterson, would NEVER cheat, right? The situation was misread: Martha was just talking to Jarold Mayberry that night about t-ball-related things, right? He WAS the the little league captain��for her 6-year-old-son’s league, wasn’t he?

Martha was gifted millions by the community, and people were insanely supportive of her. They wanted the sweet Martha they, “knew” to get better soon. They loved her so -- such a darling woman!

Her music became more well known, and soon, Martha was all over TV. Her big musical break came from when she auditioned for American Idol and made it. Her sob-story propelled her, and she eventually won.

Martha was a hero to everyone around her -- surviving a traumatic event that was uncalled for, while also being so damn chipper and kind.

Hell, did you guys see the background in one of those scenes?! Martha was canonly proclaimed a SAINT! People loved her that much.

She used the public trust to lure in more victims and never be suspected.

Martha was 28 when she died. Ralphie was 28 as well. Jolene was 10, and Beau was 8.

Ralphie managed to survive the explosion, albeit he was completely paralyzed, and the two children went to heaven. Ralphie repented during his last month alive, and confessed to his crimes. He was sent to heaven as well.

Martha and the children were declared to have died in a bear attack, as Compañerismo de la Fruta Prohibida covered up their true demise with ease.

People were heart broken -- Martha’s music was used in sad collages on Youtube, Tik Toks had Martha’s face in them for memorials.

No one ever realized her crimes.

Now! As a demon....

In hell, Martha picked up the alias Hero -- it’s what she was in life, right? I’ll be calling her Hero from now on.

Hero is both different and similar to how she was when she was alive. She’s still the got her kind-hearted, southern mama vibe going for her: She tends to be able to fit into any demonic crowd well, either by attractiveness or by sheer, overwhelming allure -- she’s a very magnetic personality.

As far as powers go, Hero’s are mostly related to firearms. She’s acquired these powers through deal making and soul dealing, as most demons do. Her charming aura very quickly lure people into thinking she’s naive or really just being honest with them.

Her nails can peel back to allow her to shoot from, “finger guns”. Each finger is a different gun, besides her middle and index fingers. They are both shotguns. Together, they make a double barrel shotgun.

When in full demonic form, Hero’s bandages become sentient. They peel away from her wound, revealing a minigun like weapon in the hole in her head. This can rapid fire while the bandages can grab onto things or hoist Hero up. She can make this last for five minutes -- ten at the longest -- before she gives out to sheer exhaustion and needs to eat demon meat to replenish herself.

Within her first week in hell, she was known to be powerful. Not quite an overlord, but powerful enough to hang around overlords. 

She hit overlord status three months later, during the terf war seen in Hazbin Hotel’s pilot: She took several areas of land, and was seen to have several lesser demons flocking to be on her good side.

Hero used her land to build up a bar and grill that serves strictly demon meat and blood, where demons can play music and dance. It’s like a fucked up country dinner. It’s an insanely popular addition to Cannibal Colony, where she lives.

The place is called La Cocina de la Calle Kuru (The Kuru Street Kitchen)

Hero REALLY wants to get her hands on exterminator tools, but she’s not really a fan of black market deals -- it’s too “trashy” for her.

Hero knows Alastor pretty well, as he’s came in for meat and to watch the music. They’ve had pretty decent conversations while she was on break, seeing as they were both influential  southern, cannibalistic serial killers. It’s a running gag between them where they jokingly talk about who was more iconic -- “I bet I took out more belles in a lifetime than you could in your entire afterlife!” “Well hon, at least I could eat the brains without gettin’ Kuru!”

She talks to Rosie a lot about business, and has met Niffty and Mimzy before. (Al hooked a bitch up with some friends lmao)

She REALLY likes Mimzy. She reminds her of Ralphie, and they became super fast friends. 

Vox and Hero have a confusing sort of friendship, as neither really wants to be seen with the other -- In his case, because she’s much lower on the overlord spectrum than him, and in her case, because she’s no stranger to Alastor and Vox’s hatred for one another. However, she often finds herself consoling Vox on sleepless nights after closing up the bar, trying to convince him that Valentino is NOT worth his time. Beyond that and him occasionally paying her back in tech at random hours of the morning, they don’t talk often.

Hero LOVES dancing! Like, a lot.

She’s seen Charlie’s ad for the Happy Hotel. Her and Mimzy watched it, and they both thought it was the stupidest damn thing they’d ever seen. However, Hero said she was happy Charlie got up there, because she was just, “Cute as a button, that lil’ sweatpea was!”

Hero’s best friends are Mimzy and an unnamed demon who specializes in black market, extermination tool selling (the one seen in in Addict -- Cherri Bomb’s former lover).

These two people, and these two people alone, can call her “Martha”

Hero cooks whenever she’s stressed. She also adores sewing and binging soap operas and reality shows on Voxflix.

Hero’s Instagram would be, “HeroicMelodies” in reference to her music career and name.

Hero gets hit on A LOT, and she despises it. She doesn’t need to seduce people anymore to get away with murder, and she doesn’t want to. She dresses the way she does because she LIKES that clothing. People can fuck off.

The reason Hero is white and pink is to show how innocent she looks. Her pitch-black eyes show her dark soul.

Hero sings in Spanish to herself when cleaning up.

Sometimes, Hero and Rosie spend holidays going around with ground demon meat to throw to the hell crows and other critters. They find it peaceful.

Hero, shockingly, holds no hatred for I.M.P., and commonly jokes about how the I.M.P.’s, “Did her a favor” by sending her somewhere she can actually be her. She has no idea who called for the hit, though. 

Hero finds Blitzo’s Instagram posts being poorly spelled to be, “Damn near precious”.

She thinks he’s a teenager, and probably would think it less adorable if she knew he was a grown man with a grown kid.

Hero doesn’t care about Mrs. Mayberry at all. Like, at all. She honestly assumes the woman is in heaven. She knew Mayberry wasn’t bad -- she probably wouldn’t care if she was in hell, though. Oh well. Sucks to suck, bitch.

Husk frequents La Cocina de la Calle Kuru to drink and engage in the gambling scene. Hero finds him trashy, but can’t say she hates him. She finds him funny as hell, and enjoys the business. Just not someone she’d personally hang out with.

[elleonmybeloved]

Field Day

Title: Field Day Author: PinkPerfume Fandom: Shall We Date? Obey me! Pairing: Asmodeus/MC Rating: Teen & Up Chapter: 1/? Tags: Demon & Angel Blood AU, Demons are slightly larger than in cannon by about a foot or two each, Secret Crush, Awkward pining, Asmodeus is hoe-rny as usual, Flirting, Leading up to that explicit rating in the second chapter cause you know me Read on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25145122/chapters/60926767

Summary:

Once a week, the human exchange students, accompanied by the seven demon brothers as well as Lord Diavolo and a few of his subordinates make a trip to a rocky place out in the wilderness of the Devildom to conduct physical testing on the humans’ developing abilities. Mary-Catherine and her fellow once-humans aren't sure why Lord Diavolo injected them with the demon and angel blood that gave them their abilities, but participation in the testing is mandatory. But if you forget the part where they're being tested like lab rats, it feels a lot like a fun school field day! Complete with packed lunches and a friendly sense of competition.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I hope you’re ready to eat my dust this time. I’ve grown two inches since last week.”

“Don’t get a big head. You got dog demon blood, not speed demon. Besides, not being able to spit acid at obstacles in your way is gonna slow you down.”

“I’d really appreciate it if you stopped doing that. Just because you look a lot more like a snake now doesn’t mean you need to act like one.”

“- Demon cobra. Not just a snake.”

“I know you’re proud of that, but honestly, I’m more jealous of the girl who got hawk demon blood. You know she has wings now, right?”

“What?! They shouldn’t let her participate in the race, it’s totally not fair.”

“It’s not actually a race, you guys.”

“Just because they’re testing us doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun with it. Lord Diavolo encouraged us to be competitive.”

Excited chattering and the rumble of the vehicle’s engine made for a charged atmosphere that Mary-Catherine was enjoying listening to, leaning her head against the glass of the window to hide her amused smile at the antics. Choosing to survey the odd shapes of plants and pigmented rock passing by outside as she listened, she angled her head so that the small tightly curled horns at her forehead weren’t scraping against the glass.

Once a week, the human exchange students, accompanied by the seven demon brothers as well as Lord Diavolo and a few of his subordinates made the trip to a rocky place out in the wilderness of the Devildom to conduct physical testing on the humans’ developing abilities.

Piled into some kind of all-terrain vehicle with such ridiculous ground clearance that Mary-Catherine had needed assistance to haul herself up into it, they were shuttled to the testing site. The vehicle was huge and had several rows of seats, so everybody just called it “The Bus.” Before them on the long straight road, the Demon lord’s sleek black limo - driven by Barbatos - led the way down the path.

Turning off on the dirt path, they pulled up to the site. As the passengers - twenty-five strong, counting the brothers - filed out of the vehicle, they cordoned off into groups like a separation of oil and water.

Mary-Catherine confidently placed herself next to the people she knew best. Donte - a young man with horned-toad demon blood who she’d never seen not dressed up in attractive punk outfits that suited his dark brown curls and yellow-green striped horns perfectly. Despite all the purple dust out here, she had yet to see any of it attach itself to his outfit.

Meanwhile, both her thick cargo pants and her usual red tank top already had a few purple smudges.

To his left, Emma, a curvy young woman in all black whose sharp feline teeth glinted against her dark lipstick, and though the pair of furry black ears at the top of head twitched invitingly, you’d have to be stupid to touch them - or any part of her - without her explicit say so. Her claws were just as sharp as her eyeliner and stung quite badly.

Mary-Catherine had never heard her give anyone that say so. Only repeated threats to anybody who would listen about just exactly the kind of dark apocalypse she would continuously rain on Diavolo and the demon brothers & co. until they returned her cat Lucy to her, or vice versa.

Standing aloof with a familiar thoughtful expression to her right, a picture of elegance and maturity that M-C only hoped she’d one day achieve, was Annika. The blonde witch had a silent strength and seemed the least phased about her residency in the devildom of all the humans Mary-Catherine knew. She even stood up to Lucifer on a regular basis.

Mary had to avoid flinching like a startled lamb every time he looked in her mere direction. In her defense, she was part sheep now, and she had no reason to believe demon sheep were any braver than those in the overworld. Though as recent months had attested, they had the same urge for salt and were about 5 times faster than a regular one running at full tilt.

Once given their instructions, and oddly-shaped “evaluators” to attach to their D.D.D.s, the four of them plus a few she was less familiar with made off for the climbing ground. As usual, the groups moved around three areas in a rotation. A rock-littered circuit of road for testing speed, agility, and endurance, a level field of purple grass and several small, dead-looking trees with painted orange Xs on them that served as a combat ground for testing offensive abilities, and a large outcropping of porous green rock to test their ability to scale rough vertical terrain.

Something of a makeshift security team, the demon brothers spread out to stand their usual guard over the three groups. Considering their powers and how each demon towered at least a foot over any regular human even in their “human” forms, on their very first outing Mary-Catherine had foolishly assumed none of the other occupants of this realm would dare try to attack the group.

Grimacing as she tied up her hair and prepared to climb, she tried to blink away the image of the explosion of goop and gore and the charred remains that had been left of the few dissenting demons who’d scarcely touched her human companions before Satan had reduced them to pulp. Though unsure of how Lucifer had torched the ones who’d gone after his group, she was pretty sure she’d never get the image of their blackened skulls out of her mind.

“What’s with the long face? You’re still the reigning champion of this rock, goat-girl.”

Looking up, she recognized the self-proclaimed “cobra” guy from earlier on the bus. Despite his competitive statement, the grin on his face was friendly. His curly black hair and olive skin tone made for a vivid contrast against his vertical pupiled green eyes. She’d seen him a few times at breakfast and wasn’t certain but she thought his name was Kevin?

“Oh nothing. I was just wondering if they were going to make me lick more rocks today. Kind of reminds me of when I used to chaperone church summer camp and all the kids would collect rocks and dare each other to hold it in their mouth for twenty seconds or eat a worm.”

Mary-Catherine paused, “-But my horns alone would’ve been even more scandalous than the time one of the adults caught someone with a Harry Potter book sooo I guess it’s not really that similar!”

“Oh trust me I doubt my mamá would be happy to see what I look like now, but that doesn’t mean I would say no to a chance to become spiderman.”

“Hey, if anybody is becoming spiderman, I think it might be me.” Donte spoke up from behind them, looking incredulously at his hand which was pressed against the wall of rock. “Check this out.”

He then demonstrated how with an odd suction noise, his hands clung to the rock of their own accord. Prying them off and then repeating the motion, he got better at the detachment process with each press.

“Maybe poisonous demon frogs can stick to things?” Mary-Catherine mused. “I watched this discovery channel episode on tree frogs once that explained how their secretion of toe pad mucous-”

“-Mucous?!?” Donte scrutinized his hands in dismay, but after finding no such secretions he breathed a sigh of relief. “The only thing getting on my hands is this rock while I climb it’s ass. See you at the top!”

Pressing the start button on her evaluator, she climbed up after him, hearing Kevin start his descent as well. She’d gotten a bit of experience with this sort of outdoors stuff at previously said church-camp, but that was nowhere near her current condition, as she easily overtook both of her human companions with no regard for the steepness of her path. Back then, she’d needed a hardness and ropes. Now, she sought out each handhold instinctively like the top of the rock was calling her.

“At least I’m not bleating.” She sighed, and from below her Kevin barked out a laugh.

“I imagine it would come out sounding more like a warbled growl.” He said. “I’ve seen the pictures you know.”

“Hey- don’t go looking at a girl’s demon pictures!” A girl lower down on the rock called up to them.

Mary-Catherine blushed and hastily pulled herself up the remaining few feet of the rock and rolled to the side as she clicked stop on her evaluator.

“Not her pictures, the pictures of whatever they injected her with!” Kevin complained, but M-C could hear the mirth in his voice.

Walking over to a smoother patch of rock, she sat down to wait for the rest of them to finish their climb. Gazing at the ground far below her, she noticed Emma and Beelzebub talking next to a couple of camp-chairs.

She had noticed before that as an act of cat-less mutiny, Emma often refused to take part in the tests, but as M-C watched her speaking amicably with the demon beside her, who was eating… something round and dripping a brightly colored liquid she could make out from here, Emma gestured towards the rock several times with a wistful expression.

Rising to get a better look, Mary-Catherine began absent mindedly stretching, catching her ankle and bending her leg with a gentle pull.

It was a bit too far for her to make out exactly what they were saying - though some of her genetically enhanced fellow humans probably could - but M-C imagined that Emma was saying something along the lines of how much she wanted to climb the ‘actual shit outta that rock’ but wouldn’t budge an inch until they gave her back her precious Lucy. Beel seemed to nod sympathetically and despite not halting in his eating process, continue the conversation.

And then he moved to grab another of whatever it was he was eating, revealing the other demon who had come to watch over the climbing group. Having used the absolute swole unit of his demon brother’s body to provide him with shade, the Avatar of Lust reclined elegantly in - well it wasn’t really a camping chair, but it looked like it could be collapsed and relocated - his seat, meticulously painting his nails.

Freezing awkwardly midstretch, both arms clasped high above her head, she was for the hundredth? thousandth? time struck by just how gorgeous of a man Asmodeus was. Not a man, she reminded herself, a demon. Good Lord in Heaven, those arms… he had his sleeves rolled up to his elbows to avoid getting nail polish on his shirt, and it exposed the beautiful lean muscle of his forearms. Burnt amber eyes focused intensely on his handiwork, his pale perfectly shaped lips pursed in concentration… he had an angular face that made him look like both like the dangerous being he was, and a sculpture of an angel at the same time.

As if aware he was being ogled, he paused his preening and turned his head, looking up her way at the top of the rock. Panicking, she hastily looked elsewhere, pretending to continue her stretches as if she hadn’t been meaning to glance in his direction…

Nothing to see here!

Soon the others joined her at the top of the rock, and with the protection of anonymity, Mary-Catherine risked another gaze his way.

Oh good, he’s back to working on his nails.

Getting caught looking at people was so awkward, hopefully he hadn’t thought anything of what he saw of her brief gaze. She was pretty sure she was safe, it was unlikely he was that interested in any measly humans anyways.

“So what was your score?”

Mary-Catherine spooked so hard she jumped, turning to give Kevin a wounded look.

“You’re a jumpy one, huh? Must be those prey instincts. Well, what was it?”

“A minute and forty three seconds.” Mary-Catherine said, wondering what kind of predator hunted sheep demons. Probably had lots of teeth.

“Guess I just need to be a minute and fifteen seconds faster next time.”

“I’m sure you can do it.” She said, giving him an encouraging smile. “If they ever decide to hand out a prize, you’ve got it in the bag.”

“Now there’s an idea.” Donte piped up, moving into step beside them as the group began to descend the smooth sloped side of the rock. “I already know what I want as a prize.”

“What do you want?” She couldn’t really think of anything a demon would have to give as a good present. She’d seen their food. And the mall. They had weird taste.

“Not telling.” Donte said in a cheeky tone that even she could read as being… salacious in nature. Annika gave him one of her disapproving mother looks and it just made him sprout a mischievous little grin.

“I’ve had my eye on a spellbook in Satan’s library I would very much like to have.” Annika said, as if trying to steer the conversation off the downhill path it was otherwise going. It was a good thing Emma wasn’t here or that’d be a moot effort.

“Uhhh, boring!” Kevin crossed his arms. “Come on guys, we’re practically in hell. I want a weapon or something with strong dark magic powers.”

One of the other girls agreed with him, and began a very enthusiastic conversation about swords and axes and other sharp pointy things. Mary-Catherine considered the question herself for a few moments, but the only thing she could think of was for Lucifer to give her her Bible back. He’d taken it away a couple weeks ago after she’d done something he hadn’t approved of and used it as an excuse to confiscate the book. She wasn’t even sure how he’d known she had it, but maybe he’d been under the false impression that she was religious?

Normally she wouldn’t have been upset about such a thing, but even though she was no longer the good devout Catholic girl her parents had raised her to be, her grandmother had given her that Bible. They’d been quite close before she passed away five years ago to lung cancer. She was much too terrified of the fallen angel to even try to get it back though. Regardless, as far as prizes go that was a bit more personal than she was comfortable with sharing.

“I think a week off school would be nice!” She said instead, and was met with a resounding murmur of agreement from the crowd.

“How about a whole month?”

---

Under the protection of Belphegor and Leviathan this time, Mary-Catherine and her group took turns sprinting on the track. Unsurprisingly, Kevin’s dog demon-blooded friend blew all competition out the water. Once that guy got started he was like Usain Bolt on steroids. Though she put in the effort expected of her to avoid getting chided, M-C didn’t bother to run full tilt. She didn’t really like this part anyways. It was the most like a test, grueling and repetitive instead of fun, and reminded her of how she was here against her will.

She was grateful when they broke for lunch, gathering around a few hastily erected plastic tables. Taking the brown bag and two water bottles, she found a somewhat shady spot to sit under a scary looking tree and redid her sagging ponytail, lamenting the state of her side braid. She downed a whole bottle of water before getting into her food.

It was kind of funny, it was the same typical sandwich chips and apple combo she was used to on outdoor events like these, but the meat was purple and the lettuce that poked out at the sides was bright red. The fruit looked like an apple, but tasted like an orange and was the color of a banana.

She’d learned to just trust Lord Diavolo to know what humans could eat, and didn’t ask what everything was anymore. One of the transfer students had been curious at breakfast and as a result she had become aware of the fact that on several occasions she had ingested eggs from a reptilian demon species called an angiphore which looked like a cross between a platypus and one of those monstrous looking fish that lived really deep in the ocean.

The thought made her choke on her mouthful of water and most of it escaped out her lips down her throat to soak into the fabric of her top above her breast.

“Oh, gosh darn it.” Of course she had nothing to dab at it with. Well, at least the cool water felt kind of nice dripping down her neck, as hot as she was after such rigorous exercise.

“Oh my, looks like someone overestimated how much they could swallow~”

Mary-Catherine scarcely had time to process that someone had managed to approach her so silently before, bending elegantly at the waist, Asmodeus himself was already pressing a handkerchief against her neck with a chiding tut.

At her stiff reaction, he smiled, looking very much like the cat that ate the canary. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of sweetie, you’re not the first one to do such a thing.”

Mary-Catherine flushed and searched for a sufficiently indignant reply, realizing he was making fun of her. But before she could come up with something, he moved in closer, dragging the cloth against her bottom lip. It was such a shamelessly demanding motion, silencing her with ease.

“You must’ve been thirsty, poor thing.” He crooned, and M-C decided to swallow her pride and just enjoy the opportunity to get such a close up look at his gorgeous face. At this angle, she could see how long his strawberry-blonde eyelashes were as they brushed the smooth, immaculate skin of his cheeks.

“It’s… pretty hot.” The words were already on her mind, so unfortunately that’s what came out of her mouth instead of denying such an obvious trap.

It was worth it for the delighted, full-teeth grin he made. “I agree.”

His fingers skirted the hem of her tank top, and with a gentle pluck, he lifted the fabric to dab a few times at the wet top of her breast. But instead of lingering, with a simple wink, he retracted the handkerchief and stood up before she could even begin freaking out about it.

“Thanks.” She said when her brain caught up, as he started to leave.

“Any time, honey.~” He replied without turning back, and was soon out of sight.

Mary-Catherine gave a dry swallow and reached for her water bottle.

~~~

The rest of the afternoon proved uneventful. Oviumalum, or the certain species of demon sheep blood she’d been injected with, apparently had the ability to rapidly elongate and thrust out their 4 sets of horns in front of them like some kind of projectile impaler. Their horns were also a key ingredient in a certain type of hallucinogenic drug, when ground to a powder.

The meager set of horns on Mary-Catherine’s forehead was sharp, and made of the same components, but so far showed no signs of developing any projectile abilities. As such, she simply had to hold still while they took a sample of her horns, ears, and tail and then was free to sit on the sidelines for most of the hour.

Lucifer had handed her a textbook about the properties of various demonic plants and encouraged her to study during the downtime.

“Like many here, you would do well to improve your academics. Here.” He’d said in that aloof tone, like she was some filthy human bug under his boot.

“Oh…” She’d said. “Well, actually, that’s-”

“You’re welcome.” He’d cut off her attempt to decline with a glare. “I hope I see an improvement in your grade reports soon.”

Mary-Catherine couldn’t help but shut up after that and bitterly open the book in obedience. His crimson stare, like the blood she was sure he was not hesitant to shed, was just too frightening. But, more interested in watching the increasingly bizarre developing abilities of her fellow humans, she’d just skimmed the pages and pretended to read.

Beside Lord Diavolo’s delight at Donte’s newfound ability, nothing else of note happened. It was amusing to watch Emma claw several inch deep scores into a variety of materials she’d never assume could even be scratched, so that’s what she’d done until they’d blown their whistle to announce that it was time to return to the House of Lamentation.

Now, she was trailing after the gaggle of tired, test-tried students, thinking about whether she was going to bathe, sleep, or eat first when they got home.

“Heeyyy, M-C!”

Looking up from where she’d been zoning out staring at her D.D.D, she glanced around. Had somebody called her name?

“Mary-Catheriiiine!!” A girl was jogging towards her, waving a hand to get her attention. It took her a moment, since it wasn’t someone she was very familiar with, but she connected the face to a name before the girl reached her.

“Yes? - Um, Hoya, right?”

“Yeah.” The girl said, smiling with a - ah. Shark demon blood. - large set of teeth. “Can I ask you a favor?”

“Of course! What is it?”

“I lost my ring up on the rocks.” Hoya said, pointing to the climbing wall. “I can see where it is but I can’t reach it myself. Can you get it for me?”

“Sure!” May-Catherine chirped, but then bit her lip. “Uh, did you tell Lucifer? It’s time to go and I’ll be fast but we’re going to make them wait…”

“Don’t worry, I told him. He said it’s fine as long as I hurry.”

“Oh. Okay!” M-C said, but couldn’t help squinting a little skeptically.

“...He said they’re leaving in ten minutes with or without us.” Hoya admitted. “But it won’t take us that long!”

Mary-Catherine was already moving. “Oh gosh, well I hope you didn’t mention my name…”

Hoya jogged next to her, long smooth grey tail wagging oddly like a dog. “Uh, I did. Sorry!"

Mary-Catherine groaned and high-tailed it to the rock.

[lilithsgayadoptednephew]

Holy Hands

Fandoms: Shall We Date?: Obey Me!   Not Rated Graphic Depictions Of Violence F/M, Other Complete Work

Chapter List

Chapter 37

"You did what?" Mammon had been pacing and yelling for quite a while, and he didn't show any sign of letting up.

"I already answered that," Acacia said in exasperation.

"I just...I can't believe... HIM?! " Mammon pointed wildly at Abaddon who was watching him freak out in mild amusement.

"Yeah we needed help" she shrugged. Abaddon chuckled in low clicks.

"Don't worry Magpie, I'll take good care of her." He winked suggestively and Mammon bared his teeth.

"Grrrrrrrr you won't be anywhere near –"

"Mammamamamman!" Acacia cut him off. "Knock it off, I got this." She smacked his ass as she walked past him to Abaddon. He jumped at the brazen action and his face went completely red as he watched her walk passed.

"We should probably be goi–" Abaddon started.

"Come on we got things to do!" She commanded with a wave as she strode past him. Abaddon rushed her, low to the ground like a centipede. When he reached her he drew up to full height and looked down at her, snarling menacingly.

"You do not make demands pet, you obey me." Acacia just rolled her eyes.

"Come on, now." She repeated.

"You can't just–"

"Ah! Nowwww"

"YOU INSOLENT C–"

"Come on greasy, times a wastin'" she turned on her heel and continued on her path. Abaddon stared flabbergasted after her.

"Hey wait! You can't just walk away from your master" he called pathetically as he ran after her.

Mammon had held in his laughter while he watched the exchange, but seeing the unhinged and widely feared Abaddon brought down to chasing his human was too much. He fell to the ground he laughed so hard.

Obviously Acacia was gonna be just fine.

0Three months ago

If only they had wings of their own, it would make the fall much easier to handle. They'd jumped and aimed for water but it didn't look like they'd be so lucky. The ground grew closer and their heart raced faster, they wouldn't survive the impact.

But they couldn't fail, they had to live, they would do just about anything to ensure their survival. They needed help, oh who could help them now? They prayed for help, any miracle or Deus ex machina to get them out of this.

Naturally, they were answered.

The wind itself seemed to slow their descent, rapping around them like a blanket and promising protection. They slowed to the point that touching down was as soft as a feather landing. Carefully they lowered themself to their knees and thanked whatever entity was their salvation.

They felt an unseen hand give two light pats on their head. A warm smile in the breeze told them exactly who had come to their aid.

Lilith always loved them without restraint.

Now they were safe on Earth, far from the brothers who'd been their family, far from Acacia who probably still needed them. They shook their head, fixating on their decisions would help no one. They had to move forward, a lot of work had to be done if they were to re-acclimate into society.

0The brothers knew their roles. Abaddon and his locusts were at their disposal. Diavolo and Luke hadn't betrayed them so far. There was no getting around it, Lucifer thought to himself.

Now was the time.

MC was given a task, one that was challenging he'd admit, but they'd been gone too long. He'd postponed for too long. Eventually he'd just have to accept that they had failed.

"Family meeting!" He called, and everyone started gathering at the familiar words. "We have all we can get to ensure our victory." He spoke, the brothers looked around at the people they'd managed to gather.

Abaddon was practically bowing he was bent so low, Acacia standing next to him with a smug grin. Diavolo hadn't spoken much to anyone but Lucifer, but his strength would be a serious help. Raphael listened from the edge of the room, not a part of the plan but still curious. All their allies were present except for one.

"We can no longer delay our attack, be ready at dawn."

0As the sun rose on the Celestial plain, Michael was well prepared for the coming attack. He'd been spying on the brothers' proceedings since the day they'd set foot in his land. He was overjoyed when MC decided to run away from the fight.

The brothers thought they were still in the Celestial Realm, but Micheal had followed them and Michael knew they'd fled to earth.

And there they waited for him. Once the battle was over and he had brought the brothers to justice he could go and claim his reward. He was practically trembling at the thought.

Now he waited, sword in hand, angels at his command, for the brothers to dare begin the fight that would surely be their last.

0There were thousands of them. Angels of all Creed's and strengths at Michael's command. Lucifer was the only one standing before them, the rest of his forces scattered across the Celestial Realm ready to make their move.

Michael chuckled down at the fallen angel. The one who'd always been the Father's favorite. The one who He has made to be smarter than Michael, wiser than Michael, purer than Micheal. The Father had created Micheal to match Lucifer only in power, to keep him in check should his pride grow out of hand. Today Michael would prove he was superior.

Today He would see which of them He should have faith in.

"Dominions! Take the Powers of the air and water to meet the demons of envy, gluttony and wrath. Take the Powers of fire and Earth to greet the demons of lust, sloth and greed." As he gave his orders and the Dominions and Powers departed, he turned back to the deceptively solitary Lucifer.

"Principalities, tell the angels we have already won. For Lucifer has come to face me alone."

0Levi sat in wait over the water.

His pets were at his call, yet still he felt vulnerable. His job, along with Beel and Satan, was to draw the Powers to the East. Belphie, Mammon, and Asmo waited to draw the powers West. Separating Michael from his forces was the best way to ensure Lucifer could defeat him, especially when they were weakened by the lack of human support.

He saw the Dominions approaching on the horizon. So many swarmed the air even the heavenly light from the sky was blocked. Like bats swarming and swooping for prey.

Levi stood strong and tried not to be afraid. His pets had never failed him, he had two of his brothers at his side, and if the worst came they could rely on Abaddon's locusts for help and even cover should they need to escape.

"Levi! The serpent!" Satan pulled him out of his thoughts. Levi snapped around.

"He has a name! "

"NOW IS NOT THE TIME!!!"

Geez fine, Levi raised his hands and reached for Henry 1.0s mind. He'd called the loyal snake before many thousands of years ago. He was out of practice, but the snake knew his call. The tide swirled and displaced with the volume of the beast rising from it.

The snake arched up sending billions of gallons spraying, dampening the wings of the assailants and sending many of them plummeting to the punishing depths.

"Yaaah!! Good boy Henry!!! Get em silly noodle." Levi cooed as if he was talking to a puppy and not a trillion ton harbinger of serpentine death. Even with the snakes assault the majority of the angels continued their descent.

And the battle began.

[scrollingkingfisher]

Gabriel Through the Seasons- Control and Self-Deception

An excessively long essay, by me.

Evening peeps! So the topic of Gabriel’s relationship with control came up in the discord last night and it resulted in an entire TED talk which I didn’t even know was in me. So here we go, all tidied up and ready for meta consumption!

So Gabriel’s complex relationship with control is written into his character from the very first time we see him on screen. In Crawford Hall, he orchestrates the whole thing- he punishes people, but it’s always from a safe distance, never getting his hands dirty. He's actively manipulating the Winchesters for the entire time they're there in a similar way. Illusions are one of the first ways that he uses to control situations and keep them at arm’s length- let’s call them his first line of defence. Through them he can distract and confuse, and it means he doesn’t have to get too close to the action, either emotionally or physically. He uses his illusions to give the Winchesters the impression they got the better of him, but really I think that was him sizing them both up, and using his persona as the trickster to keep some emotional distance from the situation- his second line of defence.

Next up- Mystery Spot. Gabriel's control complex comes out big time. The apocalypse is getting closer, Dean's played his cards, Gabriel's family-related trauma is rearing its ugly head from where he'd managed to stash it under all those layers of repression, and the situation is suddenly more immediate than he’d like. So what can he do, both to maintain distance from the situation, get some kind of control over it and to try and avert having to deal with his brothers? Oh look, a convenient vessel of the apocalypse! But he can't just tell him what's gonna go down, because that would require trust, and then the ball would be in Sam's court. Telling Sam what was going to happen would have meant relinquishing control of the situation, and he doesn’t want to get too involved either. Better to stay in his comfort zone of using his alter ego to teach Sam a lesson from a distance. It works out excellently, obviously. Sam is particularly good at cutting to the chase, over the seasons- probably because he has a similar (but not identical) relationship with control and autonomy. And that's the first time we really see Gabriel break character. Then we get to see what imo is probably closer to what he's really feeling. When somebody takes that control of the situation away from him, it makes him either scrabble to get his mask back on, or get incredibly angry and absolutely fucking lose it, or he gets overwhelmed and runs away from the situation. Which is exactly what he does on this particular occasion. Sam calls him out, Gabriel realises that he’s no longer in control here, he gives up on teaching Sam a lesson and he’s off.

Changing Channels is a whole ‘nother ball game. The complete control Gabriel takes over the situation- literally puppeteering them around his own sets- he’s eve controlling their environment. Throwing the Winchesters around and teaching them a lesson like he can't do with their angelic counterparts. Bullying them into playing their roles, because if he can't stop the apocalypse, he needs to feel like he has control over what's happening somehow, yeah? The angry outburst when Dean calls him out. And that anger when provoked is another recurring theme. If I had to guess, I’d say that the anger is another shield, his third and final defence- this time though, it’s a shield against himself, and his own emotions about his situation. Gabriel is not about facing his emotions head on. Repression is the name of the game, and like nearly everybody on SPN, he’s very good at it. And then, finally, the Winchesters know who he is and the layers of deception peel away. Gabriel can't hide any more; they know what he is. He can't run away. And he manages to keep it together, just, but I think it's a close thing, because the bitter resignation as he finally explains to the brothers what's going on? That's as honest as he gets.

Then we get to Hammer of the Gods, and this one's a little different, because as the audience we're seeing Gabriel's shields and attempts to control the situation from a slightly different angle. Gabriel is cool as a cucumber while he's with the other gods, because he NEEDS to be otherwise they'll slaughter him and he knows it (story of his life- he can never trust anyone), but as soon as he's alone with the Winchesters, he drops the act, if not the attempts to control the situation. Then he spends the rest of the episode desperately running around, trying to maintain a series of ever-more-convoluted deceptions, until he finally has to face Lucifer. And as much as I love Gabriel's return, it was absolutely in character here for him to pull one last layer of deception and nope out of the entire thing. He's stressed beyond belief. His brother just nearly stabbed him. He needs some RnR and several liquor stores.

Maybe that's why he lets his guard down with Loki and relinquishes control of the situation. And immediately it's proven why Gabriel can never let his guard down, even with his ‘allies’, because they fucking sell him. Cue eight years of torture. 

 Asmodeus was probably the literal worst thing that could have happened to Gabriel. Because if it had just been pure torture, I think he would have held up quite well. But Asmodeus stripped away Gabriel's control and autonomy. All of it. He’s a slave, but it’s worse than that, they condition him and break him until he doesn’t even run away. And that speech in Unfinished Business? Wow. He felt absolutely violated by what was done to him, and it's never explicitly talked about, but it's made fairly obvious what happened. When he comes back, he has no walls at all, no deceptions, no control over his situation or himself, and he spends the majority of the episode quivering in the back of his own mind. Sam eventually manages to coax him out, but not before showing weakness of his own by basically begging for help, and therefore handing Gabriel a little bit of control back. And then Gabriel finally at the end of the episode manages to gain back a bit of control over his life when he realises there's an opening to kill Asmodeus, and WHAM, the masks are back up, witty quip time, look at me I've got my powers back and I'm gonna burn you in a very Extra way because this rage inside has nothing at all to do with how you ripped my self-control away from me. And then Sam asks for help, and he sees a potential for someone trying to control him again, and obviously, he's gone.

Next up: Unfinished Business. Whoo boy there's a whole lot to unpack here. First off he's hunting the people who sold him. Not because they're posing a threat- they probably still thought he was still with Asmodeus until he started hunting him down- but because they caused him massive trauma and REVENGE SIDEQUEST has a better ring to it than fall-apart-alone-because-I-don't-dare-to-trust-anyone. And Gabriel has to have control over his own reactions even more than he likes to control the people around him. Gabriel never lets himself be vulnerable, even to himself. And he is hurt, and angry, so revenge quest it is! He starts before he's ready, because letting himself wallow is a no-go, so obviously he gets stabbed and ends up with the Winchesters again, because they're his least-worst option. He knows they're hunting for him, but he went to them, so he's in control, right? RIGHT! So he spins the Winchesters a story (dubiously realistic emotional mask of hot babes and decadence ahoy). But obviously Dean's that git who can't keep his fingers out of the emotional cracks, and he pushes a little too far and Gabriel loses control, and we see what Gabriel's feeling again. Or rather, what Gabriel's letting himself feel, and that’s all anger. But under it, reading between the lines, there's the emotions that he can't control, that feeling of incredible vulnerability and violation, of having your control taken from you.  And that carries through to when Loki, who obviously knows him, who Gabriel has obviously confided in previously ("boohoo, Gabriel with his mean older brothers"?), uses his knowledge of that vulnerability to absolutely rip into him, to really grind in the point while he's helpless, and even after he's defeated (by Sam throwing him the sword, not by Gabriel being able to do it himself), there's no celebration, there's no witty quips, because Loki tore down Gabriel's self delusions of control. It's an empty victory. And we see that in the scene outside where he's talking to Sam. The shields are back up, he has control of the situation and himself, and he knows that Sam knows he's faking being "swell" but at least going with the Winchesters provides something to do, a little more control for a little longer. But inside? He's even more vulnerable now, because Loki took away any sort of internal defences he might have had with his little parting speech. This is where his descent begins. His expression when Sam turns away? Absolutely hopeless and dead inside. His self-defence of anger is gone, and that's not a good thing.

I haven't watched the rest of the episodes quite as obsessively, but I'll still do the broad strokes. Getting it on with Rowena? Exercising power and autonomy over his own actions, with a healthy side-helping of "Could a depressed person do this??" He doesn't have as many problems with confronting Lucifer as one might expect, but then again, he's in control. He's got Lucifer drugged up to the nines before he even drops his disguise, and then he takes gleeful advantage of the situation to play with him for a little bit because finally, he's got control over that brother who caused him all that anguish! Revenge is almost second nature at this point. But he never breaks character through the entire confrontation. He maintains that emotional distance. Fast-forward into the apocalypse world, and I think Gabriel is genuinely deeply upset by his inability to heal Sam. One more time where he was absolutely helpless to do shit all, he has no control over the outcome, and he's not raging this time, but he's quiet and withdrawn, and that's a bad sign because he's nearly fresh out of coping mechanisms. Then Lucifer comes back. Gabriel spends the next however long scouting way way out ahead or skulking on the edges of camp, because he knows that this time, the ball will not be in his court, and at the end of the day Gabriel likes to avoid confrontation when at all possible, because why risk it? And we see him slowly sinking deeper into that depression, those thoughts that he'd managed to put off earlier through anger and revenge. He has no power. He has no control over what happens to himself or anyone else. But he manages to hoist the shields up reasonably well when Lucifer corners him, enough to get in a few good quips. But they're pretty damn transparent by this point. He's not cocky any more as he chews Lucifer out. He's just tired. And then Michael attacks, and, well. What do you do when you have no more power over your own trauma, no more leverage or self-belief, and the only control you have is which metaphorical train you throw yourself in front of? 

Gabriel sees one last opportunity to take control of his destiny. 

And he takes it. 

[addictedtostorytelling]

Do you have any favorite lines from ER? I saw your favorite episodes gifset

hey, @amidalas-shadow!

fun question! i am a sucker for er dialogue, so i have many, many favorite lines.

i put a bunch of ‘em under the “read more.”

_____

inspirational lines 

“you set the tone.”—david morgenstern, mark greene, and john carter (at various points throughout the series)

jc: “i thought i was gonna be sick. i’m sorry.”mg: “don’t ever say you’re sorry. see, there’s two kinds of doctors: there’s the kind that gets rid of their feelings, and the kind that keeps them. if you’re gonna keep your feelings, you’re gonna get sick from time to time. that’s just how it works… people come in here, and they’re sick and dying and bleeding, and they need our help. helping them is more important than how we feel.”jc: (nods)mg: “—but it’s still a pain the ass sometimes.”—john carter and mark greene, episode 01x01 “24 hours”

ch: “i just wanna be happy—and i’m so afraid i never will be.”dr: “you will. you will.”—carol hathaway and doug ross, episode 01x25 “everything old is new again”

jc: “it’s not that i dislike surgery. it’s been incredibly challenging. the training has been excellent. you are a wonderful surgeon and a fine teacher.”da: “get to the point, doctor.”jc: “i admire surgeons and surgery, but it’s not the type of medicine i want to practice. i can be a competent surgeon; i can learn the techniques, the mechanics. but i’ll never be a great surgeon. dr. anspaugh, i can be a great doctor—a doctor who spends time with his patients, who’s there for them. i’m good at it. really good. i can make a difference in people’s lives. don’t make me give that up. please don’t make me waste it.”—john carter and donald anspaugh, episode 03x22 “one more for the road”

lk: “i thought we were saving her.”jc: “no. we were giving her her only chance.”lk: “that’s not good enough.”jc: “it has to be.”lk: “no, it doesn’t.”jc: “some patients get to you more than others, i know. but when you do everything that you can—sometimes even more than you thought you could—you gotta walk away knowing you fought the good fight. you fought the good fight, lucy. tomorrow you’ll fight another one.”—lucy knight and john carter, episode 05x08 “the good fight”

ch: “i have to go find out.”lk: “find out what?”ch: “if [doug’s] still in love with me—because i’m still in love with him. i am. i’ve been in love with him since i was twenty-three years old. he’s everything to me. he’s my life. i feel complete when i’m with him, and i feel empty when we’re apart. he’s the father of my children, and he’s my soulmate.”—carol hathaway and luka kovac, episode 06x21 “such sweet sorrow”

“forget superman; i’ll take mark greene.”—abby lockhart, episode 08x20 “the letter”

“be generous—with your time, with your love, with your life… be generous, always.”—mark greene, episode 08x21 “on the beach”

gp: “what’s up, frank?”fm: “you know, i always believed that nothing ever really changed. i’m old enough that i know that there’s always gonna be trouble—war, taxes; bad guys now are pretty much the same as bad guys have always been. but that’s not how i feel today. i feel like the world’s getting worse and worse and worse, and what we’re watching is the slow, steady descent of the human race.”gp: “no. no, i don’t buy that. i think that, um, today was just a rough day for the home team.”—greg pratt and frank martin, episode 13x01 “bloodline”

“you know, nine years ago, i had—my marriage was over, my mother was in a mental institution for the seventh or tenth time—i don’t know—and i drank a lot. a lot. and i had reached this—you know what? i—one morning, i woke up in this apartment, and i had no idea how i got there, next to some guy i didn’t even remember meeting, and he was going through my stuff, looking for money so he and his buddy could get a fix. so i ran out of there, and i went downstairs, and i tried to get a cab, but i had no idea where i was, and it was five o’clock in the morning, and there were no cars on the street, so i just—i just sat down on a stoop, and i just—i waited for something to happen. and at that moment, i’m telling you, i knew—i mean, i was positive!—that happiness was something i was never going to find. i’m just trying to tell you that things can change. they can get better. even if you don’t see it, they can.”—abby lockhart, episode 13x14 “murmurs of the heart” 

sad lines

“a man came in today. he sat there and watched his wife die, and he helped her to die, because she was in so much pain, and he loved her. but we didn’t have that kind of marriage, did we, al? we didn’t love, we didn’t cherish, we didn’t respect, and now you’ve killed me!”—jeanie boulet, episode 03x05 “ghosts”

“doug? i don’t want to wake up alone tomorrow.”—carol hathaway, episode 05x15 “the storm,” pt. ii

“he’s still my baby, peter. i’m supposed to take care of him. i feel like somewhere, sometime, he’s going to be sad or cold or scared. who’s taking care of him? who’s being his mother?”—jackie robbins, episode 08x01 “four corners”

ec: “your brother believed me when i told him he’d get better—it didn’t matter where he was, how he felt, what the doctor said. i told him he’d get better. he died believing me.”jc: “no, he was pretending for you—that was another one of our secrets. i was supposed to not let you be sad. i was supposed to make you forget. to make you happy. he made me promise to make you happy. i’m sorry, mom.”—eleanor carter and john carter, episode 08x14 “a simple twist of fate”

“kem? they’re gonna come down and take us to our new room soon, and when they come, they’re gonna take the baby, and we’re never gonna see him again. i don’t know what the right thing is to say. i don’t know what the right thing to do is. it was an accident! it was nothing that you did wrong. it was nothing that we did wrong. it just happened. i love you, and i wanna spend the rest of my life with you, but we have to say goodbye to our son now. i have to help you to do that, and i don’t know how to do that. please help me. please.”—john carter, episode 10x21 “midnight”

funny lines

mp: “are you married?”sl: “no, i’m a doctor.”—male patient and susan lewis, episode 01x01 “24 hours” 

“what can i say about mark greene that hasn’t already been said? i think everybody knows how he overcame adversity as a child of quakers, his years in exile, his political writings and limericks, his mod period with the turtlenecks, his blue period, and of course his ruthless march to power and the silencing of his rivals.”—doug ross, episode 02x03 “do one, teach one, kill one”

“you are wedges. the wedge is the most primitive tool known to man. that is you. you think you know what you’re doing. believe me: you don’t. breakfast with your senior surgical resident, dr. benton, will begin in fifteen minutes. dr. benton is an intern’s worst nightmare. he’s smarter than you, he never eats, he never sleeps, and he reads every medical journal, no matter how obscure. he is the antichrist, beelzebub, lucifer—a devourer of wedges! you will go to sleep at night wishing plague and pestilence on his unborn children, and you will wake up every morning praying for his approval. you won’t get it. welcome to hell, ladies and gentlemen.”—dr. melvoin, episode 03x01 “dr. carter, i presume”

sidebar: if any of my followers from the csi fandom are reading this, dr. melvoin is played by wallace langham, aka david hodges, so imagine the above spectacular rant being delivered in his voice. also, bonus points ‘cause he’s talking about “wedges.”

sl: “first of all, i order a manhattan, straight up, two cherries. he orders a ‘fruity yet selfless’ glass of carbernet.” mg: “what does that even mean?” sl: “i have no idea! then he talks for forty-five minutes about his ex-girlfriend, whose name also happens to be susan: how much he loved her, how much he wanted to marry her, how he wanted to father her five or six children—and, by the way, do i want children? do i want five or six children?” mg: “okay, tad could be worse.” sl: “i’m not even there yet, mark. i look over, and he has this drop of red wine hanging from his nose.” mg: “what?” sl: “you heard me! this puny, little blob, just hanging there. so of course, i cannot take my eyes off of it! is it gonna fall? is it gonna hang there all night? is his skin going to absorb it?” mg: “how did it get there?” sl: “mark!”mg: “no, really! how did you get your nose that far down into a wineglass? what, was he smelling it, or—?” sl: “mark, please!”mg: “okay, what happened?”sl: “i went to the bathroom and snuck out the window.”mg: “you’re kidding.”sl: “nope.”mg: “wow.”—susan lewis and mark greene, episode 03x02 “let the games begin”

kw: “did you even take the hippocratic oath?!”rr: “i had my fingers crossed.”—kerry weaver and robert romano, episode 07x03 “mars attacks”

sw: “don’t touch me!”nr: “try not to move. i’m a doctor. you may have broken your ankle.”  sw: “if you’re a doctor, i want a second opinion.”nr: (to abby) “okay, dr. lockhart, would you care to give a second opinion?”al: (to snotty woman) “sure. your ankle may be broken—and you’re a bitch.”—snotty woman on l platform, neela rasgotra, and abby lockhart, episode 12x02 “nobody’s baby” 

_____

there are probably tons of others, too.

if you ever want any of these moments—or any others from the show—giffed, lemme know, okay?

thanks for the question!

[renegadesrpg]

Dark Angels: Creation. Part 40. Anchors and Allies. Declan

Solo. *I’d watched as Sin made his preparations to enter the Aether. I’d watched him cast the spell, watched the flames burst upward at the addition of each ingredient, and watched as his soul left this plane. And now I stood guard, both against intruder and as his anchor to this world. His image was still here, sitting on the floor, cross-legged and barefooted in front of the brazier, translucent and flickering. A tiny bit of his soul left behind as he walked the paths of power. For all his power and strength, Sin was not a god and only gods fully entered the heart of the Aether. Sin had told me it was a place where he could lose his way and become trapped if he didn’t have something to help him pull free. After all, he technically was only a disembodied soul. Being Death’s First gave him tremendous power, but not enough to go there and back without a tether. The Creator had made that plane for gods and angels alone. Oh, Sean and the others had risked meeting together at the edge of it when they needed privacy from the Horseman. Even as a dead angel, Zav’s grace and ethereal magick still had allowed them access to the misty edges, but that was as far as they could go and no one else, supernatural or mortal, was getting even that far. Except for Sin. Sin’s unique. He’s not mortal, or angel, or god, but he has tremendous power that owes nothing to either earth or ethereal magick. Death has its own power. The magick he wove to enter the Aether had been taught to him by the Fates, the sisters of the Creator, after he’d rebelled against the Horseman. The Fates had watched Sin from his human childhood some 35,000 years ago. I don’t know it for fact, but I’d bet they’d had a party when he accepted the Horseman’s gig and an even bigger one when Sin rebelled against him. Apparently they hadn’t ever had faith in the Horseman’s deal with the Creator, but had always had great belief in Sin’s ability correct things. Even thousands of years ago they could see the Horseman’s growing corruption through the choices he made. When Sin finally rebelled a thousand or so years ago Clothos, the eldest Fate, had walked in his dreams and given him the spell that enabled him to meet with them on the Aetheric plane and taught him how to use Death magick to power it. There was a risk, she’d warned him, but if Sin remained anchored to another plane, he would be able to return to it. Through the centuries the plane and the anchor had varied. At the moment he was stuck with a ghost wolfen whose soul he owned. Not that I’m complaining. Having my soul belong to him was a better gig than anything else I’d been offered after death. My soul wasn’t ready for ascension and being born into a new life didn’t guarantee I’d find Celia again. Sin had been out of the business of creating reapers and regularly escorting souls by then, but he’d been alerted by the Fates that a bonded pair of wolfen was fighting with our reaper about going to Alyssia for our souls pre-rebirth R&R. He’d warned off the reaper and made us an offer, explaining that staying on earth as unattached souls would result in our eventual descent into insanity. Before his split with the Horseman he could have enlisted us in the reaper corps, our souls belonging to the big boss, he’d said, but now being his servants and companions was the best he could offer us. He would hold our souls, yes, because that was the only way it could work, but his needs were few and he wasn’t demanding. That part had been both true and not true. He didn’t really need us, so the tasks we were assigned were easy enough and generally things we’d enjoyed doing as humans. But when he wanted something, he wanted it NOW. So Celia cooked gourmet meals for a being that didn’t NEED to eat but enjoyed it. I’d started as his man-of-all-work, maintaining his various warded refuges, but that had taken a backseat when he discovered my talent at making weapons. He’d discreetly contacted Aiden and had him teach me the art of making supernatural weapons and, with those weapons I’d covered Sin’s ass when he needed extra security.

Not often, but often enough. And Celia and I’d had the free time to enjoy each other, indulge our fondness for fast bikes without worrying about cracking them up, and do things we loved for someone we’d come to love. He became more than the holder of our souls. He became our Alpha and his inner circle our pack. The only thing missing in our post-death existence were pups. I think Celia regretted that more than I did, but, well, you can’t have everything, and I was just happy to have her. Ripples run through the wavy image seated at the brazier. For a sec I felt a moment of panic. He’s never told me how this anchor stuff worked, but my blood pressure dropped back to normal – well, if I’d HAD blood pressure it would have dropped back to normal – when my heightened senses detected the link binding us. Was this what he felt all the time? I wondered. In over 40 years, I’d never felt the connection until that moment. There was a steadiness to it now but when his image had rippled and I’d felt a strong tug, it was like a current was trying sweep him away. Not gonna say it didn’t’ get the adrenaline runnin’. But as I’d calmed down, I’d realized this was probably normal. He held my soul, but not literally. Hell, a ghost is nothing but a soul. No special powers, no magick, just soul. When we’re strong enough we can project a physical image like reapers can, but that’s it. Can’t literally be “held”. So the link between us was like a cord…a, what’s the word... a metaphysical cord that connects me to him. And when he’s in the Aether communing with the Fates or whatever, it connects him to this plane so long as I’m on it. The ‘tug’ was just me doing what I was supposed to. Being an anchor. The hairs on the back of my neck rise and my hand goes to the .48 at my back as I swiftly turn and crouch, two-handing the gun at the entity stepping through a portal at the ocean’s edge. The beach is the hardest area to keep warded, the constant ebb and flow of the salty water eroding the wards even in the half-world and even Sin can’t ward the ocean. It’s where he’s most vulnerable to attack, and, ironically, his favorite place in this world. As I recognize the being stepping through the portal, I lower the gun and drop to one knee on the wooden lanai, head bowed in acknowledgement. There’s not many I bow to, not even in Sin’s world, but she’s one of them. Lifting my head as she approaches, I stand, looking down from the steps to the sand.* You nearly got yourself shot Lady Freya. It’s not like you to just show up here. Is there a problem? *Freya stops a few feet from the stairs and tilts her head up to look at me, blonde hair streaming down her back, tiny warrior braids framing her face.* “It is just ‘Freya’ these days Declan. I think with all that’s happening you’ve gotten beyond the ‘worshipful obeisance’ phase of knowing me. If you ever had it.” *Offering me her hand as she climbs the steps, she gently chides me.* “Sin’s wards are very thorough and he maintains them even more meticulously in these times I’m sure. You should have known it must be one whom he allows past them. There are only a few of us and only Danu and I travel by portal. It’s good to see you’re vigilant, but you must be very edgy to draw a weapon at the opening of one.” *Taking the offered hand, I give her unneeded help up the stairs. A courtesy I’d learned from Sin.* Edgy is one way to put it, *I admit.* We’re near the time and we’ve had trouble both with the Horseman’s bully boys and demons that we think Lucifer is lending him. Sin’s in the Aether at the moment, La… Freya, looking for some answers. “Ah, and you’re his anchor as well as his guard. I understand your reaction now. But you must not feel you alone are responsible for his safety. Sin is never alone on the Aetheric plane. When he invokes the magick, he calls on help from the gods he trusts. Often it is Danu or I, occasionally Kali or Bastet, but this time I suspect he went higher. We do not have the answers he seeks, only the ability to keep him from losing himself in the eddies and shifts of the

plane. The Fates must be in play, and be assured, they have no wish to see him lost in the currents either.” *As she talks we turn to face Sin’s shimmering image.* That’s kind of relieving to hear. *Grimacing* You know he only tells us, any of us, what he thinks we need to know. He’s been in there a while now. I was beginning to worry I’d need to pull him out but he’s never told me how. *Remembering the courtesies now that I’ve been reassured everything’s going the way it should,* Will you wait for him out here or would you rather go inside? “You would not be able to “pull him out” on your own. Whoever is shepherding him on the other side would lend their power to strengthen your connection from their side. It would help him re-orient and find his way back. You would not find the jolt pleasant, but it would not cause lasting harm. However, it is unlikely that will ever be needed. Sin is stronger than even he knows and he has the Creator’s favor.” Her gaze lingers on the boss for a little longer, like she’s tryin’ to see what he sees, but then she turns back to me. “I did not come to see him. At least not yet. I came to see you. I need you to make some weapons. Weapons that can slay rogue reapers and demons.” *A lesser ghost’s jaw would have dropped. Freya had weapons aplenty, but none that would kill reapers. Only an angel’s blade or a reaper’s steel would kill a reaper and we kept a tight lid on who had them. There were reasons for that, Lucifer’s current fondness for killing reapers being one of them. As for demons…* Your blades can’t kill a demon? *She tosses her hair angrily.* “They should be able to. But we’ve had our own run in’s with Lucifer’s boys lately. He’s getting bolder. I can only assume he thinks the Horseman will be taking over the Creator’s role in the near future. I’m glad to hear from you that the end is near. Sin must challenge him very soon. But until then,” she smiles cagily enough that I know I’m not hearing everything – like Sin, I only get to know what she thinks I need to, “we need to be able to protect the realms. Our weapons have become less effective. I believe Lucifer has found some kind of charm or spell that prevents the weapons of Valhalla from doing lasting damage to his demons. We can wound, but, but short of cutting off their heads, they do not die and they heal incredibly quickly. Even cutting off their heads doesn’t actually kill them,” she snorts indelicately in disgust* Their bodies fall, unable to continue, but the heads live on, spewing venom, both literally and figurative.” At my skeptical look she answers my unspoken question, “Demons on the other plains do not adopt human form. We usually see them in their more natural state. Fangs, claws and all. The bodies of these monsters we can burn, but I must have 20 of the bloody heads locked up in the dungeon.” *My brow furrows in a frown as she talks. Unlike reapers, demons have physical bodies. Cutting off the damned heads should kill the fuckers.* So you need something that can kill demons, but why reapers? *She arches her eyebrow at me* Do you believe that the rogues are far behind? Especially if Sin fails. *She’s not wrong, but I know she’s not telling me everything. Still…* What kind of weapons did you have in mind? And know, I won’t give you anything without Sin’s OK on it. *Her beautiful face smooths back into a smile as she assumes she’s gained my cooperation.* “Swords, daggers, spearheads and arrowheads. We will bind the spearheads and arrowheads to shafts of rowan.” *Dubiously, I answer* The swords and daggers I’ve got. Arrowheads and spearheads I’ll have to cast and that’s going to take a little time. The forge is cold and it will take hours to heat it up enough. Are you sure you wouldn’t prefer metal shafts for them? I have some put back. Or how about just good-old bullets made from melted down reaper weapons? *She laughs at that.* “Guns are such ugly, inelegant weapons. Loud and they stink like demons after they’ve been fired.” Shaking her head* “Thank you, but no. I would not have time to

learn how to use one or to teach my people. And yes, I am sure about the shafts. The rowan will add to the magick. The Rowan tree is sacred to us and runes to make sure they fly true and harm only those with malice towards us will be carved into them. We will add our magick to yours in hopes that the unexpected combination will give us another edge. And do not worry about the forge,” she bows her head and closes her eyes for a moment before raising it and looking into mine. “It is now at precisely the temperature you need and the trough you use to temper the metal is filled with cold water.” *I could argue the “ugly and inelegant” part. Nothin’ prettier than a 9 mil when you’re surprised in an alley, but then, guns hadn’t saved me and Celia or our pack, now had they? Maybe she’s got a point. Quietly nodding at Sin,* Freya, I can’t leave him while he’s like that. I’m his anchor, his guard. “I will stay here to guard him while you work. As for being anchor… you will still be that regardless of where you are. Physical proximity isn’t the determiner of the bond’s strength.” She smiles, “Your commitment to him is. And that is very strong, indeed.” *For a few seconds I just stand there, eyes narrowed as I look into hers. There are secrets there, but no malice. Sin trusts her. But still…*I’ll get to it then, but you don’t get them until he’s back and okays it. I mean it Freya. And the forge is warded against everyone except for Sin and his inner circle. Not even Celia comes in, so you won’t be able to get to them. *She frowns, but there’s amusement in her eyes* Still you do not trust me? *A laugh follows* Well, you would be a poor bodyguard if you did. A good one trusts no one. It’s not a matter of trust, Freya, *shaking my head.* It’s a matter of Pack. I let down my mortal pack once. I won’t let down my immortal one. *The amusement dies from her eyes, replaced with empathy. She understands that this isn’t about trusting anyone. It’s about honor and the Goddess of War knows something about honor.* “I understand. Now go. I will take your place here.” *I watch as she turns from me, taking up a guardian’s stance. All the softness fades from her clean, defined features and her eyes become impassive. No one or thing will get past this warrior. With a nod, I turn and fade out, still feeling the cord that bound me to Sin firmly attached. An ally was standing guard and the anchor was holding firm. #TBC

[mittensmorgul]

Today’s jaunt through the TNT loop hit the part of s11 that points the car toward the finish line and revs the engine. 11.15-11.18  (and really 11.14 is where it starts, but I watched that one yesterday, so it feels weird to include it in a post specifically about what I’m watching today... stupid brain refusing to organize itself more practically) takes the themes of the season spelled out in the triptych of 11.11, 11.12, and 11.13 and begins driving them home with purpose.

Amara and the Darkness hang like a metaphorical raincloud of escalating depression over this run of episodes, contrasted with the light and power of the Hands of God “weapons” that equally elude their grasp. The larger metaphorical and thematic struggle of the season plays out offscreen for the most part, since these two opposing fundamental forces of the universe-- creation vs destruction, light vs darkness, order vs chaos (hello my old friends my s11 meta tags!)-- are where the main a-plot action of the season is happening. We see that cosmic struggle through the lens of what TFW are struggling with.

As above, so below. Gabriel once referred to that concept (in 5.08) to explain why Sam and Dean were the “perfect vessels” for Michael and Lucifer. It’s the same concept as “the river shall end at its source,” as Metatron once said. And it’s the essential narrative structure of the entire series as far as the individual character arcs are concerned. S11 is where this entire concept pivots around and shows us the pivot point-- Dean Winchester, the firewall between light and darkness. Chuck and Amara both literally pointed at him as their exemplar, and in 11.23 he (armed with the power of Humanity) became the vehicle that finally united them both. Such is the power of the duality of humanity the show (and Dean specifically) has been wrestling with for years (hello entire MoC arc summed up in the themes of 10.11).

I know I’ve written about Dean’s descent into depression over the Cas-Lucifer situation, and there are hundreds of posts on my blog in the tags for these episodes detailing all of this already. But I can’t help it. Dammit, s11 let me love you.

in 11.15, we find Dean already packed to head out to The Hangman’s funeral. He’s concerned for Cas, but that concern hasn’t hit DESPERATION levels yet. He’s still rational, still hasn’t really come to grips with what they can do about Cas yet beyond being positive that Cas WANTS to be saved. He’s still at loose ends over his own confession about how incapable he feels in Amara’s presence, but is still confident that Sam is handling that end of the research for now.

11.16 escalates his growing depression and frustration at any lack of progress despite the “win” he’d had in 11.15 and the reaffirmation of the whole “keep grinding” theme. What they believe will be an easy vengeful spirit case turns out to hit very close to home, bringing them back to the comparable feeling of frustrated desperation of the apocalypse era by literally existing in both times at once via the Soul Eater’s nest. It may not have been the easy win Sam had hoped it would be, but it was still a necessary diversion that allowed them to set their own pasts (via saving Bobby from the Soul Eater) to rights. A major theme of s12, as well-- rectifying their own past via Mary’s resurrection and personally coming to terms with their own legacy via the Men of Letters.

11.17 opens with Dean reaching a state of abject depression over their inability to gain any ground on either the hunt for Amara or a way to save Cas, and for the first time he drags his heels on taking on a case that Sam suggests could be a good distraction for them. Sam is clearly concerned for Dean, and despite Dean including Amara, Lucifer, and the Hands of God in the list of things they’re trying to handle, Sam narrows Dean’s reasons for wanting to hand this suspected case over to another hunt to one singular point:

Dean: All right, well, we make a call and we put somebody on it. Sam: Yeah, but... [He sighs, closes his laptop and looks at Dean]. We'll get him back. Dean: How? Sam: I... I don't know. But we'll figure it out. Meantime, we got to get out of here. Clear our heads. I mean, this is a case. Let's do what we do. Let's work it.

None of their other pressing concerns is weighing on Dean like Cas is. That one line is the foundation for the rest of the action in the entire episode. Poor dumb Corbin had no idea just how badly he underestimated Dean in forcing his hand by “killing” Sam, and selfishly using a rational mathematical argument to push Dean into walking away from his brother there. The underlying hesitation and depression Dean had been fighting through BECAUSE SAM HAD ASKED HIM TO HELP ON THIS CASE, because SAM had been trying to help get Dean out of his own head for a few days, essentially washed away when Corbin killed him.

When he finds Sam dead, Dean’s ready to give up everything. It had been SAM who’d kept him going, who’d given him a reason to “keep grinding.” Without Sam, Dean had lost hope for everything else.

It was Michelle who gave Dean a reason to keep fighting right there, and the walk through the woods to save her gave Dean enough time and space to reorganize his priorities. And it was Michelle again reminding him of Billie’s threat of the Empty that spurred him into desperate action yet again. It brought back the reminder that Dean was helpless to deal with Amara on his own, and that it was Sam that the fate of the entire universe was resting on.

And it was his chat with Billie there that finally taught him that the universe didn’t really care about fate... It gave him the push to begin fighting the depression and helplessness that was metaphorically the “thrall” Amara had over him.

11.18 is where Dean begins taking back the reins of his own fate. It’s also the first time he faces Amara and is able to ignore her completely, calling out for Cas instead. He’s begun to disconnect himself from the power she’s had over him since he took the Mark of Cain, because he chose something different. It’s also where we distinctly see the difference between Sam and Dean’s relationship with Cas, and the seeds are sown for expanding on that difference in s12.

Sam: I thought Lucifer had a shot. Apparently, uh, archangel plus God power doesn't trump God’s sister. Dean: But if the thing has to be used by God's chosen, then maybe an archangel who got the boot doesn't qualify. Either way, horn's out of ammo, so... Sam: So, back to square one. Dean: Yep. [Sighing.] Sam: Listen, um... I know I came down on the side of wanting Cas to deal with Amara, so... Dean: Well, that's what he wanted, though, right? Besides, didn't we say that we were gonna swear off getting in the way when one person makes a choice the other doesn't agree with? Sam: Yeah, um... Yeah, we did say that. Dean: So... Sam: Okay. So, that's our policy. Dean: Which sounds damn good. [Sam chuckles.] Well, let's go find that idiot and bring him home.

Yes, their policy is to honor the other’s choices, but Cas’s choice to say yes to Lucifer has played out. He thought Lucifer could defeat her, and Lucifer failed. Cas had been wrong, but that only reinforced Dean’s need to save him now. From what Crowley said about Cas being unreachable because of Lucifer’s control over him, Dean understood that Cas couldn’t just kick Lucifer out on his own, despite now having proof that Lucifer either lied about being able to defeat Amara or was just wrong about it. Cas’s “choice to say yes” hinged on that promise, and now that it was null and void, they could save Cas without wondering if it’s what he’d actually want.

It was heartbreaking for Dean to watch Amara zap Cas away, but it was actually the shot of hope he’d been needing-- the certainty that he needed to intervene in any way he could to rescue Cas.

Okay, I guess that’s enough jibberjabber about stuff I’ve already talked about ad nauseum. :P

[legion1993]

You Are My World, My Life, MY LIght... Forever Be My Queen...

Prompt: (Dialouge prompt) “I’m alive… I can tell because of the pain.” 

Pairing: Gabriel x Reader

A/N: welcome to week 11 of @thing-you-do-with-that-thing’s SPN hiatus Writing Challenge… this also happens to be part 2 of my week 6 fic… I appreciate the love for all these fics and right now I don’t know where this one will take us, but as always give this some love and ignore any spelling grammer and ignorant errors in this fic…

Plot: its been only a few weeks since the day when your heart got torn away from you, your love had been ripped away from you… you now realized with each passing moment that went by you were loosing time… you had to find a way to bring him back… but how????

Part 1

The ring Gabriel gave you has been the key to bringing him back. You discover this about 3 weeks after watching him die.

You have been working with your brothers almost nonstop trying to devise a plan to put Lucifer back in the cage. To do that though you require Gabriel’s help and finding a way to bring him back has been very difficult. Cas didn’t have many options either having never brought an angel back.

You are showering after a restless night of little sleep

You haven’t taken the ring off since you put it on. Every day you look at it and silently cry for a few minutes.

On this particular day having never officially consumated your love you are feeling especially sad. You hold the ring against your cheek and whisper "Gabe I miss you so much, " then you kiss the jewel in the ring. It sparkles and light flashes all around you. Suddenly Gabe is standing in front of you in the shower. You kiss, oblivious to the lack of cover. His hands roam over you and a sigh escapes you..

Gabriel picks you up and holds you against the wall. He sildes himself into you breaking the barrier that held your innocence, for the first time in a long time you felt like you were home. His steady rhythm and intense kissing is all you notice as Gabe gives all his pent-up love to making love to you.

After the shower ends and you both are laying on your bed, Gabriel holds you close but winced as he did so.

You look up at him.

Y/N:  "Are you ok? Are you even alive? How did you come back?"

Gabriel looks down at you.

Gabriel: "Oh I'm alive. I can tell from the pain."

You begin to apologise but he stops you.

Gabriel: "Don’t even think of apologising. You have nothing to apologise for. I enjoyed every second in that shower. It was your constant devotion to me and the kiss on the jewel along with the confession of love that allowed me to come back."

You weren’t even worried at that moment how your brothers would react, I mean you had broken away from them shortly after witnessing the love of your life, your soulmate die…

Y/N: “when you died a part of me died with you… for the first time since that moment I feel like I’m alive again… though my brothers tried to help me cope with that, I left them I ventured off on my own… they haven’t been able to convince me to come back or even let them see me… I can’t go back to living with them not until we find out how to tell them…”

Gabe: “they really didn’t take it well when they found out that I was your soulmate… especially Sam… but I think they only have…”

Y/N: “they only have my best interests at heart but they are my family… and right now I don’t even care what happens to me as long as I have you I can’t be harmed…”

Gabe: “even though that’s true babe you can’t do anything that will alert any of my brothers that I’m back… right now my brothers are trying to convince yours to be their vessels for the apocalypse.. we have to stop my brothers especially Lucifer from gaining Sam as a vessel… if Michael gains Dean things should be ok… if your brothers come in contact with you after being taken over as vessels my brothers will know I’m back…”

Y/N: “but then how do we find out if my brothers have said yes or not…”

Gabe tightened his arms around you as he kissed your forehead…

Gabe: “lets not worry bout that right now… we can worry bout it after we get settled into life together…”

You snuggled in and felt his hands on your sides… you both fell asleep together and happy.. the only thing that would make things worse would be the angels finding out Gabriel was back… they would come after both of you… they wouldn’t be able to harm either of you but they would certainly try…

There was one thing you were certain of: right there you were the happiest that you had been in weeks… everything was perfect…

You got the occasional text from your brothers but it had been days since the last text… you weren’t worried though you knew your brothers would get through whatever mess they were in…

You felt your mind slide into an unconscious state for the first time in a long time you had a peaceful sleep… but in your dream you watched in flashes your brothers getting thrown around and bloody and beaten while being pulled in opposite directions of light and fire…

This dream so vivid so realistic snapped you right out of your sleep… you sat straight up and was heavily breathing by the time Gabriels hands had you turned facing him as you snapped back to the sound of his voice…

Gabriel: “Y/N babe its ok its ok…”

Y/N: “my brothers are in trouble… I had a dream, well more like visions.. they were being beaten, thrown around and they were being pulled away from eachother and it felt so real it looked as vivid as im looking at you right now… it scared me…”

Gabriel had to think for a moment before lifting your chin to gaze into your tear filled eyes and smiling lightly as he wiped your eyes…

Gabriel: “how did it look when they were being pulled apart…”

Y/N: “Dean was being pulled into some sort of bright light, Sam was being pulled into the fire… Gabe it seemed so real…”

Gabriel: “I am too my love, perhaps you should try calling one of your brothers… you know maybe a gesture of some kind…”

You smiled as Gabe handed you your phone and held you close as you dialed Dean’s phone… the other end clicked as you could hear someone else on the other end breathing…

Y/N: “Dean it’s me…”

Ellen: “Y/N…”

You were shocked that it was Ellen who answered the phone… you were now fearful for your brothers safety…

Y/N: “Ellen is everything ok? Where is dean?”

Ellen: “that’s what I would like to know he and Sam were supposed to meet me and Jo at the roadhouse to try and check out those rings they nipped from 3 of the horsemen but they haven’t shown up yet… or well I guess they were here cause the impalas here and so is dean’s phone but they aren’t those boys have disappeared...”

You gasped and held onto Gabe’s hand… you felt the air get caught in your throat, you didn’t know what would come out of your mouth as gabe looked at you and nodded…

Y/N: “Ellen I’m bringing reinforcements and coming to the roadhouse… and I don’t know how much my brothers told you bout my soulmate and who he is but I managed to bring him back from the dead and he is gonna help us… he wants to help for me… plus he is one of the good guys he is just a brother caught between 2 brothers in a war dating back centuries… he would have been forced to choose sides if not for me…”

Ellen: “yes they told me and I say follow your heart sweety but are you sure about all of it I mean both you and your soulmate should be extremely…”

Y/N: “Ellen we know we need to be careful but there are so many things about to happen… ive seen it and that’s part of the reason why I was calling… I wanted to make sure they were ok… I guess I need a sparring partner to make sure im not too rusty to rescue my brothers…”

Ellen: “I think we can work something out… i guess we will see you soon ish… where bouts are you?”

Y/N: “just outside of san Francisco… It was nice place to be for a while I mean I dealt with the occasional ghost thing but that was it… this place is really quiet…”

Ellen: “alright safe travels kiddo…”

You hang up the phone and Gabe gives you a hug.

Gabriel: “great we are both caught in the war between our brothers…”

Y/N: “it’s like we can’t choose sides and we can’t deny eachother seemingly enough from what ellen said it sounded like my brothers were accepting my choice to pursue my soulmate… I guess we need to get dressed in order to go to save my brothers…”

He places a gentle kiss on your forehead to reassure you.

Gabriel: “don’t worry my flower you and I will be together forever… I mean you will be given a chance for immortality once you meet Michael… we have to either be blessed by Michael or we have to have him present at our wedding… which of course you want your little family at our wedding but…”

Gabriel pulls out a ring and looks at you…

Gabriel: “Y/N will you marry me…?”

Y/N: “yes of course I will… and I would love to meet Michael… but we need to save my brothers too…”

Gabe slid the ring on your finger making it official… You both get dressed and you pack your few belongings. Then Gabe snaps his fingers and you are both standing with Ellen and Jo in the Roadhouse, you were instantly pursued by a big hug from Ellen and a huge long lasting hug from Jo…

Ellen: “oh darling its been far too long… really I mean its such a far out of the way place to live hun… don’t worry Jo will help keep you more calm…”

Jo: “its been far too long.. what did you forget how to pick up the phone… come girl let me get you something descent to wear…”

Jo went then for another hug and ran upstairs to grab you something else to wear… as ellen turned to Gabriel and smiled…

Ellen: “you must be Gabriel… im ellen…”

Gabe: “its very nice to meet the person whose been like a mother to my beloved Y/N…”

Ellen: “well im happy that she is happy… I mean ever since that mark appeared on her thigh she had been wondering who was on the other end of that, but now I can see she is in very good hands…”

Y/N: “thank you ellen… I just hope we can find my brothers… when you spoke to them did they say anything, anything at all to try & tip you off that they were being pursued…”

Ellen only shoke her head…

Ellen: “no they didn’t they only said that if anything happened to them at all at any point I was to contact you…”

Y/N: “ill be right back…”

You ran out to the impala and you found: Sam’s laptop, Dean’s keys, and a bunch of papers tracking Pestilence…

You grabbed everything and went inside… you walked in to see Jo coming towards you with a set of clothes… she grabbed your hand and dragged you towards the bathroom and she put the clothes on the counter…

Jo: “ok girl strip down im gonna help you get hunt ready… also we agreed that you would throw those clothes out the next time I saw you… I have had this outfit ready for a while.. go ahead take a look…”

You then looked and saw the most shockingly amazing clothes…

You smiled as you hugged Jo and she started helping you get into your new outfit… this one would forsure knock anyone on their ass… you loved having Jo as your best friend…

You stood in the mirror with everything on except the jacket and you smiled..

Y/N: “jo I love it… but my hair… what are we doing with my hair it cant stay like this…”

Jo: “your hair wont be an issue when im done…turn away from the mirror your not allowed to peak…”

After about 10 minutes of her pulling twisting and braiding your hair, you were finally allowed to look in the mirror…

Jo: “ok you look amazing keep your eyes closed while I come in front of you with a portable mirror… trust me girl, you look amazing…”

You heard her and waited patiently keeping your eyes closed till you felt her right in front of you…

Jo: “ok open your eyes girl…”

You did as told and in the mirror you saw your hair and smiled bigger…

for when you saw this it was like you were seeing you for the first time in months… you hugged Jo instantly and before you walked out she handed you your new jacket and you felt amazing…

when you walked out you knew you would get some longing looks… especially from a certain angel but you didn’t know what Ellen would say…

Jo: “may I present the new and improved hunt/rescue ready… Y/N…”

You came out from behind Jo as Ellen looked like she was about to cry…

Ellen: “oh hon you look so beautiful…”

You turned next to Gabe who was instantly in front of you...

Gabe: “oh babe you look amazing… I think I have an idea for finding and rescuing Sam & Dean but it’s a little risky…”

Y/N: “I’ll try anything no matter how risky in order to save my brothers and lock lucifer back up…”

Gabe: “if your serious about this know this that my plan may drain you of some of your energy…”

Y/N: “Gabe I’ll do anything, what’s your idea?”

Gabe: “I can dip into your thoughts of Sam and Dean use those to track down where your brothers are being held… but like I said babe it will drain you of some of your energy…”

Y/N: “do it, find them I already committed myself to you Gabe how much worse can this get…”

You could never live with yourself if your brothers died. Gabriel kisses you and dives into your thoughts bringing up your memories of your brothers. You just relaxed you weren’t even wanting to try & fight him, you trusted Gabe with all your heart.

Gabriel at the same time, scours the entire planet in seconds, although it feels like an eternity with him in your mind, and locates them.

Gabe: “They are being held in an underground container but it’s a 20 hour drive. I could teleport you all there in seconds but the horsemen would feel my presence the moment we get there."

Gabriel explains.

Y/N: “what do we do then… I cant loose you…”

Then he pauses and looks at you.

Gabe: “Maybe though i can hide my true identity until its action time. Y/N, you will be my hiding place. Our connection is stronger than it’s ever been and so is our love. Especially since this morning. I will take my body and angelic presence back into the ring. You, my beautiful soulmate will have access to my power to teleport to where your brothers are. Once inside you can release me, and we will get your brothers out."

Everyone looks at Gabriel and then at each other. You take a deep breath and nod.

Gabriel kisses you again before disappearing into the ring. Your eyes glow white slightly for a split second…

Then you feel power beginning to surge through your body. In your mind, you can visualize where Sam and Dean are.

You, Ellen and Jo head to the Impala, get in and you snap your fingers.

Instantly you are on the side of a highway with nothing to see for miles except dense forest. You feel your brothers tensing in fear, and you know instantly they don’t have much time left.

Y/N: "This way,"

you shout and wave to the others, taking off across the road into the dark woods.

You glow a little from the power, enough to light the way for everyone. You stop at a fallen pine tree, rotting and full of termites.

Y/N: "Here, under this ground, the container...and Pestilence."

You point towards the ground and it begins to break apart, revealing a hidden cavern. Suddenly dozens of skeltons laiden with beetles and maggots come charging out of the hidden entrance. They attack the three of you and battle ensues. Your borrowed power allows you to ditch two-thirds of the demonic warriors. Jo and Ellen yell over to you.

"We will hold the rest off while you find Sam and Dean."

You didn’t like leaving them with the remaining skeletons but you know this may be your only chance to find the boys.

You nod and rush down into the cavern. It’s a bit dark as you make your way down the only open passage. At this point you figure it’s safe to release Gabriel. You begin to place a kiss on your jewel but are suddenly grabbed from behind by large bony hands covered in insects. You try to scream but a hand covers your mouth.

You have a spelled dagger hidden up your sleeve, and you bring it out and slice at the hand covering your mouth. Pestilence screams and throws you to the ground, at which point you kiss the jewel. Gabriel appears in all his angelic glory and sends Pestilence flying far down the corridor. He helps you up and whispers in your ear,

Gabe: “Go, find your brothers. I will take care of this."

Y/N: “be careful… remember we have to live long enough to get Michael’s blessing…”

You kiss him and run far then you stop. You feel pain and fear through your still lingering connection with Gabriel. Sam and Dean!!

It’s coming through one of the walls. In an instant, feeling your panic, Gabe comes to your side and blasts the wall for you before returning to the battle. You make your way through the rubble and come face to face with a large seemingly unbreakable box. Faintly inside you can hear your brothers screaming for help. You frantically search for an opening to the box but fail to find one. You can’t find any controls either.

Y/N: “Sam! Dean! Hang on!"

You begin to sob and banging on the wall wishing it open. Suddenly Cas appears and in a blink of an eye he has Sam and Dean out of the box. Then as quickly as he flashed in he was gone again, leaving you with your brothers. They are unresponsive and writhing in pain. You yell for help, realizing that whatever was inside that box with Sam and Dean must have infected them.

Gabriel was just ready to wrap up Pestilence when he felt your anguish.

He looks quickly at his adversary, who is seemingly down for the count. Thinking he has a few seconds to spare he flashes to your side and lays a hand on Sam and on Dean. His hands begin to glow and the botflies that had gotten into your brothers are no more. Gabriel looks at you and smiles, much preferring the happiness he now feels from you.

Pestilence was almost gone, but Gabriel underestimated his opponent’s strength. He had quietly followed Gabriel’s essence and waited outside the door for the right moment to strike.

Gabe leans over to kiss you before heading back to his fight. As he does Pestilence sends large Angel blades into Gabriel’s back, and causes a scream of immense pain from your beloved.

Y/N: “I will kill you for that asswipe!"

With that your eyes glow white, and Pestilence screeches as he is slowly turned to dust. Sam and Dean are in awe but quickly recover and scramble to your side.

Sam: “Y/N, I'm sorry. I wish there was something we could do."

Sam places a hand on your shoulder and so does Dean,

You look up and your brothers through your tears.

Y/N: "I know."

You whisper and bend down to hug Gabe who is struggling to breathe and stay alive.

Your tears fall harder and you place wet kisses on his forehead and lips, not caring about the blood that is beginning to ooze from his mouth.

As his hand falls from cupping the side of your face, and his breathing stops, you scream

Y/N: "NO!"

You place your hands over his heart and you begin to glow. The blades disappear and so do the wounds. Within a minute Gabriel is awake and alive and kissing you with such ferver and passion it takes your breath away.

"I knew you were my soulmate, Y/N. Marry me"

to which you immediately reply

"Yes!"

And hug him tight. Sam and Dean, although not fond of your choice of lover, are happy for you both and express their gratitude to Gabe for saving their lives.

It was a while later when you, Gabe, your brothers, Ellen and Jo all got to the roadhouse again that everything seemed to take a greater toll… for inside there was a man, everyone except your beloved was on their guard…

Michael: “hello brother…”

Gabe: “Michael…”

Michael: “Gabriel, its been far too long…”

Gabe: “haven’t seen you round since you took over the god squad…”

Michael: “im here not on business but on the fact that you and Y/N are finally together I knew you may want to talk to me so im here as family…”

Gabriel: “well brother do we receive your blessing to marry???”

Michael looked at you as you stood tall in Gabriel’s arms… he then came over to you and Gabe placing one hand on you and the other on Gabe, he smiles…

Michael: “by the power vested in me by the laws of heaven I hereby bless you both that you may marry and be fruitful… minding now that I am so proud of what was accomplished to try and lock my brother back up so here is a tip… Dean if you don’t want to be my vessel that’s fine there is another who will work just as well… but you need to be mindful… going after death’s ring will be treacherous you will undergo a few trials… but either way stopping lucifer is priority #1…”

You feel Gabe’s arms around you as Michael removes his hand from Gabriel and places both on you and smiles again…

Michael: “now by the power of heaven I charge you… do you Y/N accept the power I bestow upon you???”

Y/N: “I accept the power bestowed to me by you…”

Michael: “and do you swear to rule with grace and beauty to not take anything lightly and not to let war destroy earth heaven or hell??”

Y/N: “I solemly swear so to do…”

Michael: “Gabriel is a prince which means I have one thing to say: long live Y/N the new princess of heaven…”

Everyone in the room clapped and Gabriel looked at you then his brother and smiled..

Gabriel: “thank you brother for the blessing… and for reinstating my title…”

Gabriel approached you and smiled…

Gabe: “well my princess what kind of wedding would we like?”

Y/N: “something festive but we have time…”

Gabriel kisses you…

[turnoftherogue]

The Pool of Tears Part 1

As the light finally blinded them Lacey closed her eyes and reached out to try the door again. There was a moment of complete silence and then a hum as if she was in a crowded room. She slowly opened her eyes and found herself sitting between Sam and Dean on an airplane. "what the…" she exclaimed. "How did we..?" Sam asked looking around them. "Both good questions." Dean replied. The Captains voice rang out over the PA system "Good evening folks we are currently passing over Illchester, then Elliott County before our initial descent into Baltimore." Suddenly a bright white light erupted from the earth arching upwards towards the sky and spreading outwards across the land. "Illchester weren't we just there?" Dean asked. Suddenly the shockwave hit and the plane began to rock. Lacey grabbed hold of both Sam and Dean's hands. "Hold on" She cried and moments later they were back on the ground. "Whoah!" Sam exclaimed as his knees buckled and he landed on the concrete. Dean sat down next to him looking up at Lacey who had managed to stay on her feet."Great timing and not that I'm not grateful but why put us on a plane in the first place?" he asked as he readjusted his senses. Lacey frowned at him "I didn't put us on that plane." Dean's eyes widened. "Are you sure?" "Yes. One I have to be touching you for you to come with me and two I normally only teleport to places where I know where I'm going in case something goes wrong." "Then how the hell did we get there?" Lacey shrugged her shoulders. "Ok then where are we now?" "I took us back to Chuck's. It was the first thing that popped into my mind." Sam stood up off the ground "let's go see if Chuck knows what's going on then" They walked in the direction of the house and came to a halt at the garden path. The house looked like a bomb had hit it. Sam went to where the front door used to be and climbed in followed by Dean and Lacey. As they rounded the corner Sam gave out a yelp as something came crashing down on his head. "Owww!" Chuck poked his head around the corner holding on to a plunger. "Sam?" Chuck asked. "Yeah!" Sam answered disgruntled. "Hey Chuck." Dean called out "so you're OK?" Chuck asked. "Well my head hurts." Sam replied glaring at him. "No I mean my last vision." Chuck clarified. "You went like full on vader. Your body temperature was one fifty, your heart rate was two hundred. Your eyes were black." "Your eyes went black?" Dean asked. "I didn't know" Sam said sheepishly. "Where's Cas?" Dean asked. "Dead or gone or whatever. The Archangel smote him alright, he exploded." Lacey shuddered. "Oh no" Chuck muttered. "What?" Sam asked. "They're coming." Chuck said looking worried. "Thought we'd find you here." They all turned around to find Zachariah standing there. "Playtimes over Dean. Time to come with us." Lacey glowered at him and stepped in front of Dean. Zachariah's eyes locked on to her, finally noticing her. "Well look here. Two for one." "You just keep your distance ass hat." Dean warned. You're upset." Zachariah nodded. "Yeah a little. You sons of bitches jump started judgement day." "Maybe we let it happen. We didn't start anything. Right Sammy?" Zachariah said winking at him "You had a chance to stop your brother and you couldn't so lets not quibble over who started what. Let's just say it was all our faults and move on, cause like it or not it's apocalypse now and we're back on the same team again." "Is that so?" Dean asked. "You want to kill the devil, we want you to kill the devil. It's … synergy." "And I'm jus supposed to trust you? Cram it with walnuts ugly." Dean spat. "This isn't a game son Lucifer is powerful in ways that defy description. We need to strike now, hard and fast before he finds his vessel." "His vessel? Lucifer needs a meat suit?" Sam asked. "He is an angel. Them's the rules. And when he touches down we're talking four horsemen, red oceans, fiery skies, the greatest hits. You can stop him Dean but you need our help." "You listen to me you two faced douche after what you did I don't want jack squat from you!" "You listen to me boy. You think you can rebel against us? Zachariah fumed. He paused a moment as his eyes tracked to Dean's hand. "You're bleeding" he said slowly. "Oh yeah a little insurance policy in case you dicks showed up." Dean said as he slapped his hand against an angel banishing sigil behind the door. "NO!" Zachariah yelled as he vanished into white light. "Learned that from my friend Cas you son of a bitch." Dean muttered. "This sucks ass." Chuck sighed. A while later they had checked into a motel. Sam had gone out for supplies and Dean was unpacking his guns from his holdall. He hissed lightly as he caught the bandage wrapped around his hand. Lacey looked up from where she was sitting on the bed. "Would you like me to heal that for you?" She asked standing up. Dean looked at her surprised. "You can do that?" Lacey nodded. "I've only done it a few times before but its only a small wound so shouldn't be too hard." She took hold of Deans hand and unwrapped the bandage covering it. She gently placed her hand over the wound. Dean felt a warmth and suddenly his cut didn't hurt anymore. "Thanks." He said. Lacey turned her gaze upwards from his hand and her eyes locked with his. He could feel the warmth replaced by the feel of her palm in his. There was a sudden noise as the door opened and Sam walked in. They broke apart and Dean went back to sorting out his guns. "Hey" Sam said as he tossed a small parcel at each of them in turn. "Hex bags." Sam explained. "No angels or demons are gonna find us with those things." "Where did you get them?" Dean asked. "I made them." Sam told him. "How?" "I… I learned it from Ruby." Sam said sheepishly. "Speaking of, how are you doing? You jonesing for another hit of bitch blood or what?" Dean asked. "It's weird. To tell you the truth I'm fine. No shakes, no fever. It's like whoever put me on that plane cleaned me right up." "Supernatural Methadone" "Yeah I guess. Dean…" "Sam it's Okay. You don't have to say anything." "Well that's good because what can I even say? I'm sorry I screwed up? Doesn't really do it justice you know? Look there's nothing I can do or say that will ever make this right." "So why do you keep bringing it up?" Dean snapped. "Look all I'm saying is why do we have to put this under a microscope? We made a mess. We clean it up. That's it. Alright so say this is just any other hunt you know? What do we do first?" "We'd figure out where the thing is." "All right. So we just got to find … the devil." A moment later there was a knock at the door. Dean grabbed his gun as Sam went to open it. A woman was standing on the other side of the door. She looked shocked and seemed to be having trouble breathing. "You Okay lady?" Sam asked frowning at her. "Sam is it really you?" She asked. "And you're so firm." She said putting a hand on his chest. "Uh do I know you?" Sam asked looking confused. "No but I know you. You're Sam Winchester and you're…" She peered around the door at Dean. "Not what I pictured. And who are you?" She asked looking at Lacey suspiciously. "I'm Lacey" She smiled. "I'm Becky" She said glaring at Lacey. "And I'm not with him." Lacey said shuffling away from Becky across the bed. Becky's expression cleared and she turned her attention back to Sam. "I read all about you guys. And I've even written a few…" She stopped and giggled. "Anyway Mr Edlund told me where you were." "Chuck?" Dean asked. Becky nodded. "He's got a message but he's being watched. Angels. Nice change up to the mythology by the way. The demon stuff was getting kind of old." "Right just umm what's the message?" "He had a vision. The Michael sword is on earth. The angels lost it." "The Michael sword?" Dean asked. "Becky does he know where it is?" "In a castle on a hill made of forty two dogs." "Forty two dogs?" Dean asked incredulously. "Are you sure you got that right?" Sam asked. "It doesn't make sense but that's what he said." She stepped towards Sam. "I memorized every word." She put her hand back on Sam's chest. "For you." "Um Becky can you quit touching me?" He asked awkwardly. "No." Becky replied. A few hours later after Becky had finally left Bobby arrived in the Impala. Lacey had gone out on to the balcony to clear her head. So much had happened in the past forty eight hours. Suddenly she heard raised voices coming from within the motel room. As she opened the door she heard Bobby say "This kind of thing don't get forgiven boy. If by some miracle we pull this off I want you to lose my number. You understand me?" Sam nodded looking crestfallen. "There's an old church nearby. Maybe I'll go read some of the lore books there." "Yeah you do that." Bobby told him. Sam turned to go. "I'll go with you." Lacey said following him out to the Impala. As they got into the car Sam turned to her. "You don't have to come with me you know." Lacey shrugged. "It'll be nice to have a change of scenery. Besides I think they have things to sort out." She said inclining her head back to the motel. "Well if you're sure you'll be safe with me." Sam said sadly. Lacey smiled at him. "Whether your safe or not I'm probably the best person to be around." Sam smiled back at her and pulled out of the parking space. After extensive reading Sam called it a day and drove them back to the motel. As they neared the room they heard a smashing sound. Sam broke into a run, crashing the door open, Lacey right behind him. They saw a couple of demons and Bobby attacking Dean. Bobby had Dean by the throat. Lacey flung her arm out and the demons flew across the room and hit the wall. As soon as this happened Bobby loosened his grip on Dean and stabbed himself with the demon knife. "Bobby!" Sam yelled as he rushed towards him. Lacey followed him and kneeled down next to Bobby. Suddenly one of the female demons reared back up from the floor and slammed her foot into Laceys head. Lacey keeled over onto the floor and everything went black. @18crazybutcutealsopsycho

[luciisthebest]

Descent Into Darkness

Pairing: Alistair x Reader

Summary: After the readers death, her descent into darkness begins. 

Warnings: Angst, death, suicide (it’s not graphic), descriptions of torture, torture, descriptions of wounds, some cussing, blood. 

Word Count: 1,336

Song: Way Down We Go by Kaleo

A/N: I don’t know what to say. This is dark and I’m sorry, I’ll probably go to hell for writings this. Please heed the warnings and also I would highly recommend listening to the song while reading. 

“Father tell me, we get what we deserve.

Oh we get what we deserve.”

This was it, today was the day you were going to meet your maker. Well actually you had already met him but minor details. Today, you were going to die and go to hell. Hell was what you deserved and that’s exactly where you were going.

“And way down we go.

Way down we go.

Say way down we go.

Way down we go.”

The best part was it was going to be slow and painful. You had already been laying in the grass for probably twenty minutes and there was no help coming. Guessing by the bruising you could see, you had internal bleeding and you had several deep cuts that wouldn’t stop bleeding. You were going to run out of blood soon enough and then you were going down. Down to eternal pain and torture.

“You let your feet run wild.

Time has come as we all oh, go down.

Yeah but for the fall oh, my.

Do you dare to look him right in the eyes?”

There was no hope. No matter what, you were going to die and the saddest part was it wasn’t even a monster that had done this, instead it was a human. A psychotic human that was still out there somewhere and was probably coming for you. As you gasped for breath you heard it, heavy footsteps where drawing near you and you knew the man was coming. You still had your gun, but the likeliness of you actually getting a good shot were slim to none. The steps grew closer and you felt dread creeping down your spine. Your body was broken and there was no way you could fight him. As he stepped into the clearing, you looked into his eyes and saw your death. Death at his hands would mean excruciating pain, he had the eyes of a monster and he meant to make you pay.

Lifting your gun, your hand trembled with fatigue. The man just laughed at you as he slowly stepped closer. The longer you held the gun the harder you hand shook, there was no way you were going to be able to make a kill shot.

If you were going to hell, then you were going on your own terms. With a swift movement you brought the gun up to your temple and pulled the trigger ending it once and for all.

“‘Cause they will run you down, down til the dark.

Yes and they will run you down, down til you fall.

And they will run you down, down til you go.

Yeah so you can’t crawl no more.”

Now you always thought death would be far more glorious but it was all really quite boring. Your soul was bartered for and of course hell won. From there you were taken to hell and put on the rack. Now this was where the fun began.  Day after day different demons tortured you. Some days they would cut the flesh off you bones, and other days they would use blunt force and beat you till you were unrecognizable.

~~~~~

Today you had met Alistair, he offered you a way out of being tortured but when you said no he made all the previous torture you had experienced seem like child’s play. At the end of his session he stood over you covered in your blood, the pain made you want to vomit but you refused to give him that satisfaction.  

“See you bright and early tomorrow.” Alastair said in a singsong voice as he set his razor on the table. All you could do was lay on the floor, there was no way you were going to last with him as your torturer. You watched as Alastair walked out of the room and you knew it would only be a matter of time before you broke.

“And way down we go.

Way down we go.

Say way down we go.

‘Cause they will run you down, down til you fall.

Way down we go.”

~~~~~

You were on the rack for 45 years before you broke. The day you broke Alastair handed you his razor and without a second thought you tore into the man in front of you. He cried out and begged you for mercy but you gave none. You ended up killing him in your rage, but with the snap of his fingers Alastair had revived him.

Now you were Alastair’s star pupil, today he was going to let you conduct your own torture and you were thrilled. Glancing at the mirror you smirked, to say you had embraced your dark side would be an understatement. Currently you were wearing black thigh high stiletto boots, black jeans, and corset style top. This was your favorite way to tease Alistair, you knew he loved to watch you work in outfits like this and later he always showed you by ripping your clothes off and making you scream his name loud enough for all of hell to hear.

~~~~~

Walking into the room, you watched as Alastair’s eyes roved your body. “See something you like?” You smirked at him as you picked up a blade.

Alistair herded you against the wall, leaning closer to you he whispered in your ear, “‘mmm I’m going to make you pay for teasing me later.” His voice was filled with a dark promise.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” You teased as you pushed him away. A huff of annoyance came from behind you but you ignored him. Swaggering over to the fearful woman on the rack, you smiled at her as terror flooded her eyes. “Oh don’t worry honey, I’m only going to tear you apart.” Raising your blade, you quickly slashed her stomach and smiled in satisfaction as blood gushed out of the wound, splattering your shoes.

A scream escaped the women as pain twisted her face. Leaning down you gently caressed her face, “shhhh don’t scream, we’re just getting started.” You slapped her hard across the face. From that moment on it was a free for all, you used every method of torture that Alistair had taught you on her and you relished in her screams.

Eventually you became bored with the woman, and simply snapped her neck. Alistair laughed from behind and with the snap of his fingers the woman was revived. “I do love it when you work.” You could feel Alistair’s eyes on you as his footsteps grew closer.

“Well you are a kinky bastard, so why am I not surprised?“ You laughed as you began cleaning the blades you had laid out on the table.

Alistair grabbed your arm from behind and spun you around. His eyes were white and he had a devious smirk on his face. “I think I like the idea of you working for me more often. What do ya say to making this your day job?“ He winked at you.

“Really?” You practically squealed in happiness.

Alistair pulled you closer. “I think we should seal the deal with a kiss for old times sake.”

That made you laugh, of course he would suggest something like that. Leaning toward, you closed your eyes. The moment Alistair’s lips met yours, you double over in pain, screaming as a fire tore through you.  

“Oh bab-bab-yeah.

Wow baby.

Baby.

Bab, down we go.

Yeah.”

Collapsing to the ground, you lost consciousness. Even in the stifling blackness of unconsciousness you could still feel pain running through you. And then suddenly it was gone and you were jerked back awake. The first thing you saw was Alistair and you started screaming at him in fury. “What did you do to me? I swear I will kill you, you motherfuc-”

“Look in the mirror, before you threaten to do all sorts of fun kinky things.” Alistair pointed to the mirror in the corner.

Climbing to your feet, you quickly made your way over to the mirror. What you saw made you gasp in shock. Black eyes stared back at you from your reflection. Black eyes that could only belong to a demon.

“Welcome to the fold.” Alistair’s smug voice made you to spin around.

“Oh I’m gonna make you pay.” You growled as you stalked towards him.

Alistair’s eyes turned white, "Oh I do look forward to this, give me all you’ve got little girl.“

"Mmmm you know it does things to me when you call me little girl.” Your voice was huskily from the lust pulsing through you. Finally reaching Alistair, you slammed him against the wall and kissed him roughly. Tonight you were going to show him just how grateful you were. He had been pivotal in your true descent into darkness and you had loved every second of it.

“And way down we go.

Way down we go.

Say way down we go.

Way down we go.”

Tags:

@mogaruke @msimpala67 @percussiongirl2017 @tomorraw @meganwinchester1999 @ria132love @lucifer-in-leather @impala-dreamer @idreamofhazel @wayward-mirage @helvonasche @quiverhope

[gcdgiven]

gcdgiven: ........ i started writing something [at work] but i'm legit holding back tears so i actually have to stop and wait until i get home omg @cellobowsandarrows:  ......... what did you start writing gcdgiven: ...............  somethin'  cellobowsandarrows: .................. what kind of something gcdgiven: ................   a sad kinda somethin' cellobowsandarrows: oh no. WHAT SAD SOMETHING. DONT PLAY GAMES WITH ME gcdgiven: LET'S JUST SAY IT'S SO SAD THAT IT MADE ME WANT TO CRY IN PUBLIC. AND I DON'T DO THAT SHIT IN PUBLIC cellobowsandarrows: WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU WRITING OMGOSH 

TW: Character Death.... my bad....

He wasn't pacing. He had paced in the halls the night before their wedding. He had paced when she was in labour, a restless energy that was felt by everyone that dared to go near. He had moved for the sake of moving, afraid of collapsing into himself like the stars he'd looked after once upon a time.

There was very little difference between the devil and the wolf that walked grooves into the perimeter of his territory. Every step was measured, the deliberate descent into a primitive state. With every step, his shoulders rounded out, his jaw hung a little lower, breathing through his mouth like a canine. Perhaps, finally, the earth had claimed him in his final form. The Beast, alien to the people of Eden, would always prevail of any humanity inside him-

"Dad?"

He turned like he'd been attacked from behind, hands swiping out to snatch at empty air, nostrils flaring, eyes wide and disturbed. It was only at the sight before him that he faltered - remembering that humans didn't take well to the heightened animal. His children stood, frozen in alarm - only seeming to ease when they saw the recognition in his eyes. Lucy was the first to move, averting her gaze from her father's raw emotion to fix her jacket. After a moment, Sam reached out to touch her arm, but didn't turn away.

"We're gonna be at B's house," he said. A moment, hesitating (an opening, vulnerability, now's the time to strike - stop it, your flesh and blood are not the enemy), before he went on, "She asked for you."

"N-" The word became stuck in his throat, and Lucifer gave a little grunt. Apparently, wordless, he gave the slightest shake of his head.

"Don't." It was the first time he'd heard Lucy speak all day. All week, really, "She asked for you. This won't be postponed."

Dark eyes flash over to her brother's gaze, signalling the final decision on the matter. Sam swallowed past the lump in his throat, and looked down at the ground. It took a moment, but he nodded in agreement, and let go of his sister's arm. She didn't move yet, watching, waiting for her father. A stubborn dog reluctantly obeying a command, Lucifer walked towards them - to the door they blocked. Satisfied by the response, Lucy headed for the exit. Sam remained until his father was right in front of him.

He opened his mouth, and that was as far as his resolve would take him. His eyes were turning red around the edges, and he had to swallow once more before he was able to croak out, "Love you, Dad."

Lucifer looked at him, and for a moment - maybe he was there. It was enough exposure to place his hand to the back of his son's neck and pull him in, pressing a kiss to the man's forehead. Sam crumbled under pressure, his breath beginning to shudder out. He lingered in the moment, his eyes slipping shut as his son fell apart. He couldn't do this, not to Sam - he couldn't let his children watch him slip away. By the time he pulled away, he managed to scrape together something of the voice of the father they knew.

"I love you both," he made sure to look at Lucy. He made sure that she knew, before glancing back at Sam, "I'll see you later."

Cheeks stained with tears, the man gave a small nod, and finally followed his sister out. Lucifer was alone in the hallway, waiting to hear the click of the door as they finally left. The beast inhaled, tilting its weary head up as he filled his lungs... and he killed it. It wouldn't be fair, to be so much of something and let that something die in front of her. Lucifer took that breath, and opened the door.

Kate had him locked in her gaze immediately. So much had changed over the years- she seemed so small, so frail, now, and yet those eyes were still able to say so much. She saw right through him. Tired, the crease between her lips tugs up at the corner, a quiet assurance. Simple acceptance. He inhaled, air making every pipe quiver on the way down to his lungs.

"All dressed up for me, darling?" he tried, falling flat on the delivery. But Kate's smile stretched, and it was encouraging enough. He shut the door behind him, crossing the room to place himself in the chair at her bedside. As he did, he went on, "You really shouldn't have. The kids were just in here. Naughty."

"You absolute-"

His hand took her small, withered one, and lifted it to press a kiss to her knuckles. He didn't dare break eye contact as he murmured, "I know."

Kate closed her eyes, her mouth bobbing as she tried to wet her lips. It pained Lucifer more than he could put into words. He'd seen this woman jump off buildings. Now she couldn't get out of bed, was hardly able to speak. Their universe was dwindling, the walls closing in. He knew this day was coming. He knew saving her, that night in the alleyway, was only postponing the inevitable.

Kate Morningstar was going to die.

"How's Sam... taking it?"

It was with numb words that Lucifer told her, "Barely made it out of the room. Lucy's in shock. They're grieving... but they'll be alright."

For Kate, it was too late for tears. But if she would have cried at all that night, it would've been then, in the hesitance before she dared to ask in that warbling voice.

"And you?"

Him? He was sitting at his wife's deathbed, with barely three gray hairs while she had shrivelled under the pressures of time. How was he taking it?

The question drew him out from the cold that numbness provided, though the heat that awaited him wasn't warmth.

"You're dying. How do you think I'm taking it?"

"You'll... you'll be alright..."

"Enough." There was more power to it than he realized he had in him to muster. But there was a spark, and it was burning, "They love you. They love you, Kate."

Almost tired, as if they'd had this conversation a thousand times, she asked, "You didn't?"

It was the past tense that made him snap.

"It wasn't love. I didn't love you. Love is for humans. I gave you so much more. I'm giving you so much more. It's everything, you're everything. Kate-"

"Don't... make this hard."

"What, don't make it hard to die? I think I'll continue to be an obstacle."

"Stop. Lucifer... we talked about this-"

"I lied," It was perhaps the most heartbreaking thing of all. He'd shattered everything he stood for to compromise, and in the e... and now it wasn't enough, "I lied, Kate, I lied, I'm so sorry-"

"Lucifer..."

"I'm not ready. I'm not ready, please. Please stay."

"Won't you... lie down? Lucifer... please?"

"I'll lie down later. Not now-"

"There is... only now..."

He had reached the end of his strength. His whole life was slipping away, and he found himself powerless to stop it. Powerless to do anything except listen. Obey. Finally, the great adversary merely followed the command of his deity. Carefully, he slid his arms underneath her, shifting her over to make room for him. He sculpted himself to her side the best he could without putting his weight on her. He ducked his head down, nudging his nose into the crook of her neck.

Her chin bumped into his head, and she hissed, "Gently, Lucifer..."

Almost in defiance, he bared his teeth and pressed them flat to her shoulder, right where it disappeared under her collar. Kate inhaled, one hand moving to touch his elbow, sliding up along his bicep.

"I said gently."

"You know me. You know this is gentle."

He lifted his head and, as if a fire had been sparked in him, he was angry. How dare she forget? They'd spent a lifetime fighting side by side. He was many things, but softness was a rare trait. He was strong. She was stronger.

Kate's breath rattled in their silence. He was starting to cry - or he only just realized - but he didn't dare look away. Using his first knuckles, he stroked over her face, lingering in the folded lines. They'd lived a life, they'd lived a forever - he'd given her everything he could. Everything he didn't think he could. Against all odds, she'd grown old, and he'd had the honour of being in her life.

Her eyes were glazing over. His breath catching, he dared to nudge himself a little closer, his nose a hair's breadth away from hers. She blinked, focusing once more on him.

There is only now. Swallowing back the sound that was bubbling in his throat, Lucifer told her, "I loved you. I love you. I will always..."

He was close enough that she could bend her elbow, resting her hand on his back. He closed his eyes against the wave of tears, leaning into press his forehead to hers.

"Take... care... of them... Lucy... Sam..."

Lucifer gave a nod. If he whimpered, it was only for them to hear. But he broke through the warble in his voice to promise, "I will. Darling, I will. Everything's arranged, they'll ask for nothing-"

Kate's chest rose and she hummed a laugh. He felt her wrist lift from his back, trailing her fingertips along his spine, "Prawn..."

"Yours," he opened his eyes, pulling back a little to meet her gaze, "Forever y-"

Her eyes had slipped shut, and he could've sworn his heart stopped. But then she nodded, the trace of a smile.

"Lie... lie down..."

Lucifer sat up so she could take her hand back, and lay down on his arm beside her. He grasped her clasped hands in one of his.

"I'm going to find you," he promised, "I'll going to do everything in my power to lift my banishment, and I'll find you in your paradise."

"Luci..."

"I'll find you."

"Love..."

"I love you."

He shifted closer, just enough to kiss her temple. They closed their eyes, and that's how they remained for the hours that slipped past. Her tired, rasping pants kept the silence at bay, distracted them from the fact that maybe, perhaps, they'd finally run out of all the things to say to each other. He was afraid to say something, and watch in horror as she couldn't reply back. She was too far gone. It was only a matter of waiting.

"I should've killed your father. I should've never run away that night after Uriel died. I shouldn't have said the things I said. I was wrong. You were right, you're always... You're always good. You're a hero, Kate Morningstar. Maybe a part of you never believed it, and I know I've always been a prawn... but I'm your prawn. And you... you've always been my hero. And I never thanked you for saving me. Thank you."

Her breath was fading, the space between each one growing longer.

"I will always be grateful for you, my dear. I will always love you."

There was a rattle, from the back of her throat. Lucifer's chest hitched, his grip tightening around her lax fingers.

"I love you. I love you."

A star will seize before its collapse. Kate's lungs clenched, and she exhaled. A silence. Her heart stuttered, as if baffled by the failings of the rest of her body - and eased. She sighed once more, stilling.

One beat. Two beats. Another breath.

And Lucifer was alone again.

[padaheck]

My favourite and least favourite seasons of supernatural ranked

I'm gonna go from least favourite to most favourite. Spoilers for all seasons ahead. 12; S7. The whole leviathan plot line was fairly weak in my opinion and the season itself was pretty forgettable. It's the only season I haven't rewatched in it's entirety. In my opinion the best part of this season was our introduction to the amazing Charlie. Also this is the season where we lost Bobby so... I shouldn't have to elaborate on that too much. 11; S12. I know I probably shouldn't include this season because it isn't over and I don't know how it will end so I can't really judge it but... I'm going to anyways. I'm just flat out not enjoying this season and instead of staying up all hours just to watch new episodes live, I find myself not watching episodes for days or even until the next episode is out. The excitement is gone for me and I really hope this season turns around and pulls me in again. 10; S10. This season (which I can barely remember, I really need to rewatch it) annoyed me for a couple reasons. First off, the writers really wasted Demon!Dean. They should've spent way more than 3 measly episodes exploring this character instead of ending it abruptly for a musical episode. Another reason it annoyed me was the season finale. I couldn't believe they would actually kill off Death. It was such a stupid move. I still can't wrap my head around it. 9; S11. This season really didn't do it for me at all. I didn't really like the Darkness not because she was a bad character (well she wasn't amazing but she wasn't awful either) but because it seemed like the writers were just trying to create the Biggest Big Bad. Confirming Chuck as God was nice but it was just telling us what we all pretty much worked out on our own. The finale, which I live posted about, really pissed me off. Months of showing us how much Amara hated God were wasted when they solved their issues after five minutes of speaking. I won't even speak about Mary's resurrection because then I'll just get mad and this section is already long enough. 8; S8. There was so much going on in this season! I didn't want to put this as low as I did but there were much better seasons than this. That said, this wasn't a bad season at all. It saw many amazing characters (coughAbaddoncough) I loved the finale to this season, it has become one of my favourites and the scene between Sam and Dean in that church where Sam tells Dean he doesn't care if he dies? Breaks my heart every single time. So yeah it's a shame this had to be at number 8 but there's simply better seasons than this. 7; S6. Let me start by saying the reason this comes before S8 is because I fucking adore Soulless!Sam. Like, he's my favourite Sam second only to normal Sam. So that's a big contributor as to why I like this season. I really liked how Dean got a taste of an apple pie life and his relationship with Ben was really adorable. This season also saw the creation of my (and many others) favourite episode, The French Mistake. For me, Samuel really brought this season down and I wasn't Castiel's biggest fan either but of course I have forgiven him. Can't say much for Samuel though. 6; S9. This was one hell of a season, such an emotional rollercoaster. I was actually pretty fond of Gadreel and thought he was a decent character. Metateon infuriates me, even to this day but not in a way that would make me not want to watch episodes he's in. He's a good villain to say the least. Man, that season finale. It really fucked me up, especially that last shot. I joined the fandom about a month after that episode aired because I heard so much about the emotional trauma of that final episode. 5; S3. This season was amazing! It pains me to put it at number 5 but like S8 there's just better seasons. Anywho, watching Sam being lead astray by Ruby was both very frustrating to watch and also fun. Ruby is a character I love to hate, particularly the original Ruby seen in this season. Deans inevitable descent to hell was devastating, especially that finale. God, seeing Sam clutching Dean's mutilated body while sobbing was heart wrenching. It's a shame it only has 16 episodes. 4; S2. Oh man, oh man S2. I love this season more than words can express. I love love love the whole 'psychic powers' storyline and was definitely satisfied by how it played out. That two part finale fucked me up so badly. I can hardly bear to rewatch either of them because it hurts so good. This could easily be in my top 3 favourite seasons if the next season wasn't as amazing as it is. 3; S4. One word: Castiel. One of my favourite characters of all time is introduced in what I consider to be one of the most badass introductions to a character ever. He is such a prick when we first meet him and I love it. I don't think I have one bad thing to say about this season. The finale was brilliant, Ruby's ulterior motives were finally revealed and it felt so good to watch her being ganked. I desperately need to rewatch this season. 2; S5. Wowowow! I don't even know what to say other than I fucking love this season. Lucifer might be my favourite villain of all time so beautifully played by Mark Pellegrini and occasionally Jared Padalecki. The writers really nailed it with this season and so did our boys Jensen and Jared and Misha, with some of their best scenes being in this season imo, especially Jared in the season finals. I am endlessly impressed by this season. 1; S1. This season will always be my favourite no matter what new seasons they come out with for one reason. It was the season that hooked me and got me emotionally invested in the boys lives. I'm so eternally grateful I started watching this show and I know if the pilot wasn't as stellar as it is, I probably wouldn't have continued to watch. I love rewatching this season just to see the fresh faced, squeaky voiced Sam and Dean overcome the monster of the week, a format I truly miss. Not only that but S1 just looks completely different from recent seasons. Everything seems darker and grittier and I love it. So that's it. I didn't mean to waffle as much as I did but hey, shit happens. Feel free to give me your thoughts my dudes

[mittensmorgul]

For the first time in weeks, I had exactly zero messages, anon or otherwise, asking me about the new episode. Let me say, I feel y’all’s apathy. There were a few things that are worth mentioning, though.

First of all I AM THRILLED THAT GAVIN WAS RESTORED TO HIS PROPER TIMELINE. As to HOW and WHY and all the rest of the details surrounding Gavin’s return... I’m just gonna...

BUT IT IS DONE. I am more than willing to just close my eyes to the timey-wimey bullshit fixing their original problem dredged up. It’s just gonna give me a migraine trying to sort through this problem. I just... can’t be fussed to care.

For ~plot reasons~ I’m just gonna... handwave the whole mess and pretend it’s just... not a problem anymore and just move on with my life. Especially since it didn’t really seem like Bucklemming themselves could be fussed to do it much justice. The whole plotline played out with the feeling that they’d been ordered to clean up their mess by Dabb and they went about it in the most perfunctory and grudging manner possible.

Okay. :)

On to the other important plot-related stuff, in order from least disappointing to most disappointing:

Mary’s descent arc is moving along apace. Those BMoL weapons that we find absolutely morally reprehensible (that mutate vampire blood to poison them en masse like some sort of radiation sickness, and now a ray gun that boils rugaru brains at twenty paces), Mary thinks they’re neat and effective tools. Her “training” session with Ketch was a more voluntary and only slightly less horrifying callback to Castiel’s “training” under Naomi to kill a warehouse full of Deans. To an extent, I think when Dean learns the entire truth about Mary’s involvement with the BMoL, it’ll have the same metaphorical impact. Basically a room full of “you’re dead to me” Deans... a la “the face.”

(aside to note that all I could think of when Mary complained about “the face” was Phil Dunphy on Modern Family talking about how “in the know” he is about the kids’ lingo... before listing off the acronyms he knew... including WTF, which he sincerely believed stood for “why the face.” WHY THE FACE. And yes. This was a serious WTF for me... in the correct meaning of wtf...)

So yeah, Mary’s come ~partially~ clean to Sam and Dean. She’s been willing to accept Ketch’s statements about Toni having been a “rogue operative” who wasn’t working within the authority of the MoL, but Sam and Dean have seen just a little bit too far behind their curtain. They’ve also had experience with these sort of shady deals, and unlike Mary, they’ve grown FAR past the “shoot first, ask questions later, just kill ALL THE MONSTERS” mentality. Mary still believes in that definition of hunting. On top of all the guilt she feels personally-- rightly or wrongly-- for the lives her boys ended up leading.

That fundamental core belief is in need of some serious shaking, and I think (I hope!) that 12.14 begins to address that for her. She’s still keeping some secrets (like her role in having been ordered to steal THE COLT in 12.12...) so Sam and Dean are still partially in the dark as to the extent of her shady dealings. There’s definitely more revelations to come to light before they have all the information they need to begin putting the RIGHT questions to Mary...

Dagon’s an interesting character. Kinda relieved she was used so lightly in this episode, so they didn’t have a chance to do anything regrettable with her... but still... both she and the two angels had no trouble finding Kelly, when Cas and Sam and Dean have been looking for her for weeks now with no success. I’m now rolling my eyes at the logic gap with that one, but then I remember Bucklemming and again it’s just easier to handwave it and accept they lack a grasp of narrative continuity and logic. *HEAVY SIGHING*

I’m slightly confused as to how she was able to just annihilate two angels so easily when Ramiel needed to use Michael’s lance on Cas... but then again maybe he could’ve just poofed Cas to death and he just wanted to watch him suffer with the wound from the lance instead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

(I should probably just title this essay *shrug emoji*)

(anyway, moving on)

Rowena was a delight, as usual. I love that she’s developed her own interesting relationship with Sam and Dean, independent of Crowley. And despite the fact that Rowena has worked with Crowley when their motivations were to defeat a common enemy, it’s interesting to see the sort of situation that has the power to drive a wedge between them.

I’m glad that Rowena’s grudge over being forced to kill Oskar has finally gotten a little payback. I also find it interesting that her revenge also including a “child” who had been “displaced in time.” Rowena had given Oskar immortality, which in its own way is just as problematic as Crowley’s desire to give Gavin a shot at a normal life in the wrong time.

Crowley’s weirdly powerful feelings toward Gavin, I believe, stem from just how human and vulnerable he’d been through most of s9 when he was at the peak of his human blood addiction. Granted by 9.21 he’d “recovered” a lot from that, but he was also biding his time waiting for Dean to completely succumb to the Mark. Crowley had some weirdly familial feelings for Gavin, after having largely ignored the boy for most of his life. Getting a chance to give Gavin a taste of normal modern life was probably the least he could do to repent for that... but the fact he STILL seemed to care so much now is just... weird. IDK.

I saw another post complaining that Sam and Dean didn’t “let” Crowley have a proper goodbye, and Rowena had frozen him when he’d reached out to Gavin. BUT CROWLEY WAS NOT ABOUT TO SHARE A TEARFUL GOODBYE. HE WAS ABOUT TO BOOP OUT WITH GAVIN AND TAKE HIM TO PLACES UNKNOWN TO PREVENT HIM FROM RETURNING TO HIS PROPER TIMELINE. So, no. I don’t think their actions there were hypocritical.

Dean’s shirt during the “Send Gavin Back To The Bottom of the Ocean” scene was eerily similar to the ugly plaid couch on which Cas nearly died in 12.12. So, watching Gavin reunited for all time with the “love of his life” while wearing the goofiest look on his face as these people who were brought back together by the power of their love in order to repair a broken timeline and restore a bunch of innocent people to life... *it’s all about the love... and love* and I mean thanks costume and props folks for dressing Dean in Castiel’s 12.12 couch basically. I see what you did there. I only put this so far down the list because it’s interesting, but that’s all it is.

Cas and Dean are still having private phone calls. But after the intensity of 12.12, and the revelations about Cas and his feelings, what we were given as a reminder here was just... underwhelming. There was just no weight to it, as if 12.12 hadn’t even happened. As if Cas hadn’t nearly DIED, and confessed his LOVE and feeling of FAMILY and BELONGING. It’s just... opportunity wasted to have given some sort of (or ANY sort of) emotional punch to the fact that Cas has just ~randomly left the bunker to fruitlessly continue the random Kelly search~ all alone. I mean... ???

Crowley. Oh dear. Can you say, Character Assassination??? I mean, wtf, bucklemming. After one of Crowley’s strongest episodes in YEARS, where we got a plethora of incredible insight into his motivations, his history, his intelligence, and his FEELINGS for the Winchesters-- including Cas-- all of a sudden we get this ridiculous disaster of characterization?

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK.

What was both ridiculous and terrible here:

Crowley really had no idea that the Winchesters had failed to kill the nephilim?

THEY HAD BEEN IN PRISON BUCKLEMMING! REMEMBER? WHERE YOU’D PUT THEM WITHIN MINUTES OF THEM BANISHING LUCIFER IN THE FIRST PLACE?! AND IT WAS YOUR STUPID FUCKING PLOT HOLE THAT ALLOWED THAT TO HAPPEN IN THE SAME MOMENTS THAT KELLY WAS ALLOWED TO “ESCAPE.”

I mean, you could’ve just left her in the White House with the President and had Cas escape safely with Sam and Dean, BECAUSE YOU, CROWLEY, HAD THE ABILITY TO JUST BOOP IN AND PICK KELLY UP TO DO WHATEVER YOU WANTED WITH HER DOWN THE LINE. BUT NOOOOOOOO IT’S YOUR OWN DAMN IDIOTIC CANON ACROBATICS THAT HAVE LED US TO THIS INANE PLOT SITUATION FROM WHICH THERE IS APPARENTLY NO REPRIEVE. YOU STUPID FUCKERS.

So in order to make this entirely idiotic and contrived plot line work, you have to warp a character so far beyond logic that they barely even seem to be the same character we saw the week before... and no. After the brilliant writing, the loving recollection of past canon and the incredibly nuanced characterizations we’ve had over the prior three episodes, this just felt THAT MUCH MORE FUCKING CONTRIVED AND WRONG FOOTED.

I’m not really gonna forgive this bit.

Crowley, Mr. “i’m the only one on the board who doesn’t underestimate those denim wrapped nightmares,” Mr. King of Protecting his own Self Interest, Mr. You’re Good But I’m Crowley... you... bucklemming... want us to believe that in ANY ITERATION OF REALITY that Crowley is not only petty and vengeful enough to have his demons pull the same “resurrect the meatsuit” bullshit they pulled to fix your meatsuit with in 11.01 TO DIG UP AND REPAIR LUCIFER’S FORMER VESSEL NICK, as well as “studying the molecular makeup of the cage” in order to forge some weird dog collar thing strong enough to hold Lucifer, and that you would risk unleashing Lucifer on the world again ENTIRELY OUT OF PETTY VENGEANCE BECAUSE YOU WANT TO FORCE HIM TO CLEAN YOUR FLOOR WITH HIS TONGUE?!

I’m sorry. That’s just... no. That’s too much no.

AND IT GETS WORSE!

Not only is Crowley suddenly behaving idiotically out of character here, HE IS ALSO SUDDENLY MORONIC ENOUGH TO LET INFORMATION SLIP IN LUCIFER’S HEARING? Like the fact that he even had a son at all, let alone was having some sort of ~personal issues~ surrounding this weird parental family dynamic?

AND CROWLEY IS REPEATEDLY PUTTING HIMSELF IN A SITUATION WHERE HE’S LET HIMSELF BECOME COMPROMISED THIS WAY?!

I mean... this is NOT the Crowley we’ve seen lately. The Crowley who would sacrifice the only weapon that could potentially put Lucifer out permanently. One of the FEW weapons that could even protect him from what he should likely expect will be the revenge of Dagon and Asmodeus after Crowley essentially broke his deal with Ramiel... yet he’s too busy being a petty little tyrant toward Lucifer to be concerned about them?

I guess I’m particularly outraged about this 180 degree about face in Crowley’s characterization because after three OUTSTANDINGLY character driven episodes in a row, what we got here was a TERRIBLE FUCKING MESS.

Most of s12 so far has felt so deeply personal, like all of the major plot arcs have been deeply rooted in the characters own feelings and history, and have revolved around the questions of what is family and what is love and who am I and where do I fit in this world.

And in 12.13, it seems like ALL of that was just tossed out the window in favor of a couple of utterly contrived and flimsy plot points.

With a few obvious exceptions as stated above, it just felt entirely out of step with the rest of s12. In the hands of a capable writer, that could’ve been an entertaining and believable episode. But what we were served lacked any of the finesse and character development we’ve grown accustomed to.

Pro tip for writers: You have to make the plot actually fit the characters you’re writing for. This episode is an excellent example of how NOT to do that... >.>