#we are aware of the slang

[norwegianrailwaystories]

I think that the person who said “Granfos is a king” is just using slang to say that they think Granfos is really awesome.

"Granis IS really awesome! That's a fact we all know about."

[aibidil]

I’d like to suggest that we allow “necking” and “petting” to remain archaic, but bring back “to spark it” as more evocative than “making out” or “getting off” (and more clear than the ever-confusing British vs American usage of “to get off”)

[bbeelzemon]

okay first of all was anyone going to tell me that ac/dc is an australian band. and second of all was anyone else going to tell me that they're apparently colloquially referred to as "acca dacca" in australia

[jitteryjive]

idk maybe this is just me being a baby but i don’t like at all how extremely common it is as slang now to call people slow or r*tarded/restarted or ask if someone’s autistic/acoustic/afflicted with the tism/insert gross euphemism for not understanding the lightest of things. ok yeah it’s always been a problem but i feel like it dipped until people remembered being ableist is cool

[kashverse]

imagine the horror on sukunas face when his daughter starts saying the slangs he uses 😭

it was bound to happen. sukuna’s vocabulary was always going to come back to bite him in the ass. you just didn’t think it would be your sweet, precious angel who would be the one to scream—

"FUCK!"

—in the unusually quiet sukuna household.

you froze. sukuna froze. the houseplants probably froze. there was a pin-drop silence as you slowly turned to look at your sweet baby girl, standing in the middle of the living room with her tiny fists clenched, an identical scowl to her father’s on her face.

"…baby," you said carefully, "what did you just say?"

"FUCK!" she repeated, as if testing out the weight of the word, her face scrunching in concentration. you gasped. 

"sukuna."

"why the fuck are you looking at me?" sukuna hissed, then immediately winced. "shit—fuck—damn it!"

"papa said a bad word!" babykuna pointed, looking gleeful.

"you just said it first!" sukuna yelled, looking personally betrayed. you rubbed your temples, already feeling a headache coming on. “where did you even learn that word?” 

your baby girl blinked at you. "from papa."

you turned your head so slowly towards your husband that you swore you heard your neck crack.

"of course she did."

sukuna was silent.

"baby," you knelt down in front of your daughter, taking her tiny hands in yours. "we don’t say that word, okay?"

her little face fell, eyes glistening with tears as she realized you weren’t pleased. "did i…" she sniffled, voice wobbling, "did i dis’point mama?"

oh. oh no. you felt actual heartbreak rip through your chest as you scooped her up, hugging her tight. "no, no, no, baby, you could never disappoint me—"

but before you could fully reassure her, she burst into tears, wailing, "i don’t wanna make mama sad—!"

"shit," sukuna muttered, running a hand down his face. "now look what you did."

"what i did?!" you shot back, eyes blazing. "you're the reason she knows that word in the first place!"

"it's a normal word!" sukuna argued, throwing his arms up. "people say it everyday!"

"SHE'S FIVE!"

as you continued to yell, sukuna slowly retreating into the corner of the room, crouching down, his arms wrapped around his knees. he was silent. too silent. you paused mid-rant, suddenly aware of the existential crisis happening behind you.

"…sukuna?"

he didn’t respond. just stared into the abyss, eyes vacant. "i failed as a parent," he muttered to himself, voice hollow. "my baby girl… my princess… she swore before she even learned to spell properly. i—i’ve corrupted her—"

you blinked. "sukuna, what the hell—"

"don't cuss in front of her!" he snapped, looking devastated.

"ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS RIGHT NOW?!"

"mama said a bad word!" babykuna gasped.

"oh my god." you wanted to scream.

[starlvcied]

THINGS THEY DO THAT YOU FIND CUTE (CLASS 1-A) - [PT. 1]

characters ; izuku midoriya, katsuki bakugou, shoto todoroki, eijiro kirishima, denki kaminari, tenya iida, hanta sero, mina ashido, tsuyu asui, ochaco uraraka, kyoka jirou, momo yaoyorozu

g/n reader, no warnings.

✮⋆˙ - izuku midoriya : izuku physically cannot stand still. he has to be moving somehow, but he isn't really aware of this. he tends to have a habit of playing with his hair, whether it's running his fingers through it or twirling his finger around a few strands, you find it being the cutest thing ever. you never point it out though, because you know he would burst into a flustered mess and stop whenever he catches himself doing it. you find it cute, but he would find it so embarassing.

✮⋆˙ - katsuki bakugou : we all know this man is great in the kitchen. so, whenever you catch him cooking a meal for you, (or himself, mostly himself...) all you could do is smile. on one occasion, you were out running errands. you had come across an apron with the lettering "kiss the cook" on it. you picked it up with a smirk, imagined how he'd look in it, but you had figured he would just scold you for it. so, you put it back.

✮⋆˙ - shoto todoroki : he's so chronically offline. whenever you ask to do something trendy with him, he tilts his head at the idea and raises a brow at you. whenever you use any form of slang, he's just as confused. you try to explain, he still doesn't get it. urban dictionary is his best friend. the reason you don't explain this kind of stuff to him is because of that silly, clueless face he makes when he has no idea what you're talking about. it's a foreign language to him, but he tries his hardest to understand you.

✮⋆˙ - eijiro kirishima : kiri loves to manhandle you. tossing you over his shoulder, tackling you, throwing you onto the couch, anything like that leaves you a giggling mess. he knows you love it, too. he enjoys it just as much as you do.

✮⋆˙ - denki kaminari : he is always smiling. that has to be one of your favorite things about him. he has the teethiest smile after he does literally anything, especially when he does things to impress you. he has the most contagious smile you've ever seen. you love to see him smile, and you would do anything to make sure he's always cheesing.

✮⋆˙ - tenya iida : he is so damn respectful. i know we all are aware of this fact already but i want to put emphasis on it. walking down the street, he'd always help an elderly person. walking in/out of a store, of course he'd hold the door for the person behind you. he never forgets his manners. this is your favorite part about him, all you can do is admire.

✮⋆˙ - hanta sero : sero is not afraid to make things for you. you having a bad day? oh, he actually made you guys matching bracelets. he has a bead and string collection because he knows you love jewelry. he's also great at origami, he's always available to give you something. he can definitely crochet. you still sleep with the fat elephant he made you. you think its adorable, and you keep everything he gives you.

✮⋆˙ mina ashido : you love it when she asks to dance with you. she holds her hand out to you with a grin before pulling you into a tight embrace. it doesn't matter what the fuck kind of music is playing, megan thee stallion or lana del rey, you two will be dancing. she asks you so unexpectedly, but you don't complain. there will never be a boring moment with mina.

✮⋆˙ : tsuyu asui : tsu isn't much of a talker, but that definitely changes once she's with you. you guys have occasional yap sessions, some of them pertaining to nothing specific at all, you two just talk just to talk. you wanna gossip? she's all ears. you have something on your mind you think is stupid? she needs to hear it. she always listens to you, even if what you say makes no sense. she's so interested in what you have to say, you never feel like you're talking to a brick wall when you're with her.

✮⋆˙ - ochaco uraraka : karaoke. car karaoke is your guy's personal favorite. only one of your hands on the wheel, all four windows down, music to the max. usually, you would find this embarrassing. but ochaco always seems so happy singing with you. katy perry, wave to earth, laufey, taylor swift, red velvet, any artist of your choice. she loves listening to music with you, often sharing earbuds. but she definitely prefers borderline screaming in the car with you. you secretly admire each other, taking short, (maybe not so short) glances at one another. the way she's enjoying herself makes your heart melt knowing how comfortable she is with you.

✮⋆˙ kyoka jirou : she obviously plays her instruments to you. you love when she shows you snippets on some things she's been working on. the way she's so passionate and absolutely amazing at the thing she enjoys leaves you in a trance. her voice is music to your ears, and a soft smile grazes her lips when she notices how hard you're staring at her. if she could play you songs forever, she definitely would.

✮⋆˙ momo yaoyorozu : like sero, her love language is gift giving. since she's rich, she used to often travel before attending U.A. she has countless souvenirs from a variety of other countries, some you didn't even know existed. she also loves taking you on shopping sprees, she doesn't mind at all. momo does so much for you, and all you can do to return the favor is show her an endless amount of affection. you feel guilty she does all this stuff for you, but she assures you that it's okay and she loves doing this for you and seeing you happy. your heart drops to your knees. (in a good way, of course. <3)

[themultifanshipper]

nobody gets me when i say daniel x oscar x reader but i need it desperately

“What's an Aussie kiss?” 

Or, the story of how Mark Webber’s existence led to a series of very fortunate events. 

Warnings: smut, threesome, mention of alcohol, oral, brief anal play, the sloppiest two person blowjobs, just pure filth, anti FIA propaganda lmao, also bad dirty talk? 

Being Daniel's ex-teammate, and current best friend, you knew a lot of Aussie slang. 

And you'd learned even more upon becoming Oscar's teammate. 

You were in a club, and for some godforsaken reason, you were squashed in between Mark and Oscar, with Daniel on the other side of the table in the small booth. 

And then you'd met Oscar's manager Mark, and, well… whenever the three of them found themselves together, your head would start pounding within minutes of them starting a conversation. 

“F1 has gone soft!” Mark slurred, already halfway into a coma. “And it wasn't even that long ago that we could swear freely and make dirty jokes without FIA cunts breathing down our necks!” 

His drink sloshed around his glass as he spoke, and you managed to dodge the spills despite being in the splash zone. 

Daniel laughed and added “Yeah, you couldn't talk about Aussie kisses nowadays without being fined!” 

The three of them laughed freely, taking sips of their drinks. 

Everyone had seen the famous clip of Mark. 

Unfortunately, you had not. And that delightful little nugget had never come up in conversation before. 

So you turned to Mark, and drunkenly asked “What's an Aussie kiss?”, much to the delight of your two fellow drivers. 

“You'll find out when you're older, kid” he smirked and you scoffed. 

When he tried to get up to order more drinks, he swayed so badly that Daniel had to catch him to avoid him falling onto the table. 

“Okay old man” he chuckled “let's get you an uber while you're still conscious” 

He led Mark through the crowd towards the exit, leaving you and Oscar to laugh at their retreating figures. 

“He's such a lightweight” Oscar giggled. 

"You're one to talk!” you slapped him on the shoulder “Your cheeks are redder than a fucking Ferrari” 

“Oh yeah?” he smiled at you, “At least I know what an Aussie kiss is” he bit his lip teasingly. 

The way he said it made a shiver run down your spine. Despite not knowing what it meant, you felt the urge to ask him to show you. 

You were suddenly very aware of how close you were, and the heat of his thigh against yours made your stomach clench. 

You cleared your throat, breaking the awkward tension and took a shy sip of your drink. 

“Don't suppose you’re going to tell me, are you?” 

He chuckled and bumped his knee against yours under the table. 

“Like the old man said, you'll find out when you're older” he teased. 

Even though there was only a year between you two, you always felt like he was the mature one of the team. The older and wiser teammate. 

You found that quite attractive, if you were fully honest. And with the amount of alcohol in you system, you definitely wouldn't hesitate to say so if asked the question. 

“Fine, I'll just ask Daniel, I'm sure he would be happy to show me” 

Oscar rolled his eyes dismissively, absolutely hating the idea of you going to someone else, just as Daniel stepped back into the booth and sat down where Mark had been a few minutes before. 

His thigh was now firmly pressed against you, and you suddenly felt very overwhelmed by their presence. 

“Dannyyy” you whined “Oscar won't tell me what an Aussie kiss is!” 

Daniel just laughed. 

“That's because he probably doesn't have much experience in that domain. I on the other hand-“ 

“Uh, actually I have more than you think!” Oscar interrupted and Daniel grinned at him. 

“Sure you do Piastri, but I’ve had at least a decade of practice more than you so-“ 

Oscar scoffed and gave him the finger. 

“Guys!” You slapped the table to grab their attention. “Just tell me and I’ll be the judge!” 

Oscar hesitated. He was slipping into dangerous territory right now. 

He was very attracted to you, and would love nothing better than to spend the night showing you his uhh… kissing abilities. 

But you were all far too drunk to make any rational decision making, and Daniel's presence was making him uneasy. 

Not to mention you were his teammate and friend. 

Daniel was thinking along the same lines. You were his drunk best friend, and the last thing he wanted to do was take advantage of you. 

“I'll tell you what” he piped up. “If you ask again when you're sober, we'll show you” 

They nodded at each other. They both wanted you, but they needed you to be clear headed. 

There was absolutely no chance you would remember this tomorrow, so this was their safest bet. 

You warily agreed, and the subject was quickly changed. 

What they didn't know, is that that night, before you went to bed completely hammered, you set a reminder on your phone. 

“lok up Ausie Kiiis on gogle” 

Well, at least it was readable to you the next day. 

And you did look it up. And found the video of Mark, which made you laugh. 

But as the night before came flooding back in your mind, you remembered Daniel's offer. 

They wanted you. They wanted to do that to you.  

Butterflies erupted in your stomach as the thought of the two of them between your legs made you gasp. Yep, it had to happen. 

Daniel and Oscar really thought they were out of the woods when they didn't hear from you all day. But then, in the evening came a text from a group chat you'd created with the two of them. 

There was a screenshot of the urban dictionary result, and few simple words that made both men twitch in their pants. 

“Instructions unclear, demonstration necessary. Room 312” 

Oscar being only a few rooms away in the same hotel meant that he got there within two minutes of his phone buzzing. 

As soon as you opened the door your were lifted by your thighs and carried over to your bed. 

He crawled over you, not giving you so much as a hello before he captured your lips in a bruising kiss. 

He was going to make the most of Daniel’s delay. 

You couldn’t help but gasp into it when you felt his hands wandering over your body teasingly, making quick work of your outer layers. 

“Jesus Osc” you panted as his lips travelled downwards, sucking and nipping at the skin of your neck. “If you were this desperate to touch me you could have just asked” 

He grunted into your skin, continuing his descent and leaving soft kisses over your barely covered breasts. 

“Didn't know you'd be into it too.” He mumbled “I didn't want to make anything awkward” 

Any response you had quickly died on your tongue when you felt a fingers brush against your clothed cunt. 

“Soaked through your panties already?” he chuckled darkly, rubbing against you with more pressure.  

You blushed, hips bucking against his hand. 

“Please, Oscar” you whimpered into your hands that were covering your face. 

“Please what?” he teased, sliding a finger under the fabric and ghosting it over your sensitive skin. 

“Fuck me, please” you whined. 

He laughed softly. “But darling, that's not why you invited me here, is it? And in any case I think we should wait for Daniel, don't you?” 

You huffed impatiently. 

“If you're that wound up, why don't you come here and let me use that pretty mouth of yours, hmm? It'll give you something to do while we wait…” 

Daniel almost broke his neck by tripping in the stairs while running as fast as he could to get to you. 

When he wrenched the door to your room open he scoffed at the sight of you on your knees at the foot of the bed. 

“Couldn't even wait for me, could you. Bastards…” 

He ripped his shirt off and made his way over to the bed. 

“I had to shut her up somehow, she's so fucking needy” Oscar pulled you off his cock and helped you to your feet. 

Daniel cooed and leaned down to kiss you, and expertly unclasped your bra while Oscar dragged your underwear down your legs. 

The kiss with Daniel quickly turned filthy, and he walked you slowly towards the bed and pushed you down on it. 

“So who gets first dibs?” Oscar asked, eyeing your body and smirking at the goosebumps appearing on your flesh as you gazed up at the two men. 

“How about Oscar first, since he was gentlemanly enough to wait till you got here?” you offered and they shrugged in agreement. 

“Works for me, that way I'll get to prove I'm better afterwards” 

You and Oscar both rolled your eyes at Daniel's statement, and the younger man quickly spread your legs and kneeled in between them. 

You were dripping already, and at the first swipe of his tongue through your folds, Oscar thought he'd died and gone to heaven.  

He groaned, lapping up your juices, and then alternated between fucking you with his tongue and circling it around your sensitive clit. 

You were moaning freely, gasping at every change of pace and pressure.  

There was definitely no denying it, he knew what he was doing. 

When he sucked on your clit your back arched, letting out whiny little moans as he made your legs tremble in no time, your thighs trying to close around his head. 

Daniel, despite not touching you, was having the time of his life. 

He was sitting next to you on the bed, and from this angle he could see every tremor, every micro-expression as you writhed under Oscar's undeniably skilled mouth. 

You were exquisite in his opinion, and he hungrily watched your breasts heaving as you tried to catch your breath after Oscar made you come all over his face. 

The younger man licked his lips hungrily as he stared up at Daniel, eyes challenging him to do better. 

You barely got any reprieve before Daniel was pushing Oscar out of the way and bending your legs at the knees. 

“Hold yourself open for me, darling” 

You did as you were told, and looked down at him while he nosed along the crease of your inner thigh. 

He pushed his tongue inside you, and you let out a gasp when his nose brushed against your clit as he moved. 

The tip of his nose was quite cold, and the difference in temperature was surprisingly pleasurable. 

But Daniel didn't plan on staying there for long, he'd come to win, even if that meant playing dirty. 

He gave your clit a teasing suck before releasing it with a pop, and slowly, his tongue made its way lower, exploring your taint, and eventually making contact with your tight rim. 

The new feeling made you shudder, and he brought a hand up to thumb at your clit in a steady rhythm while he worked his tongue against your ass. 

Your nails were digging into your own thighs where you were holding them open, and a quick glance at Oscar's expression told you he was not happy, despite being obviously turned on. 

Once Daniel could feel you loosening, he prodded his tongue inside you a little, and the sensation was so foreign to you it forced a shaky moan from your throat. 

You felt Daniels smirk against your skin and he quickly retracted his tongue, and slowly made his way back up. 

You were rapidly approaching the edge now. And the renewed attack of his mouth on your cunt was promising a spectacular finish. 

Then you felt a slight pressure lower down. 

He was rubbing his thumb against your asshole, aided by your dripping juices. 

He applied some pressure, and his thumb easily slipped inside, carefully massaging your walls while his tongue lapped at your clit hungrily. 

It took you seconds. 

You came with a loud cry as you arched your back, riding out the waves of your intense orgasm, through which Daniel helped you gently by slowing down his movements until you were shaking under him. 

He sat up and grinned at you from above. 

“So? Who was better?” 

“That's not fair, you cheated!” Oscar huffed indignantly. 

“I did not! It isn't specified how low we're allowed to go”  

“But you used your fingers! I didn't”  

“Well yeah, you gotta make use of all your assets” he wiggled his brows. 

They looked at you expectantly. 

“If one of you isn't inside me in the next 30 seconds I am kicking you both out” you muttered at the ceiling. 

They chuckled and shuffled around the bed. 

You ended up on top of Oscar, sinking down on his surprisingly thick cock while Daniel sat next to Oscar's head. 

You leaned down to take him into your mouth and he grabbed your hair in his fist in a makeshift ponytail. 

“So eager to please, isn't she Oscar? I think we’ve struck gold with this one” 

Oscar started thrusting into you slowly, and your deep groan around the cock in your mouth made Daniel mad with need as he watched you take him down eagerly. 

He then noticed Oscar was eyeing his cock with something akin to hunger in his eyes. 

“You look jealous, Oscar” he teased. “Fancy a taste?” 

He pulled you off him, and Oscar licked at his tip teasingly. 

You didn't feel like stopping though, so soon Daniel had two mouths on his cock, licking and sucking at his shaft. 

“Jesus Christ, you two are so fucking hot, what the fuck” 

You and Oscar worked in tandem, lips making brief contact as you made out with the cock between you. 

It was truly a porn worthy performance and Daniel could feel his composure slipping. 

“Fuck- stop, I'm gonna come too soon” 

He pulled you off and shuffled backwards, taking a quick breather, and Oscar laughed meanly. 

“The old man's gonna come first, that's funny” 

He was obviously just goading Daniel, but the evil glint that suddenly appeared in the older man's eyes as he got an idea made his stomach churn. 

“Wanna swap then?” he grinned, and Oscar nodded eagerly. 

Daniel lay down so you could climb on top of him, rolling your hips slowly to get used to the slightly lengthier cock, and Oscar kneeled next to him, mirroring the position from before. 

You took him down to the base first, the taste of your own slick making your eyes roll back in your head, and Oscar couldn't resist thrusting into your mouth a few times. 

“Fuckin’ hell, why were we arguing over who's better when her mouth is clearly superior”  

He gasped when you swallowed around him and used your tongue to trace the underside of his cock. 

Then you let him go with a pop, and looked at Daniel with a smirk. 

The two of you got to work, worshipping Oscar's cock with your mouths and he marveled at the sight. 

But then Daniel decided he needed to prove his superiority. 

He licked down the vein on the underside, slowly inching towards Oscar's balls. 

He licked over them, and took one into his mouth, gently sucking on it just to make Oscar lose his mind. 

“Jesus, Daniel… fuck-“ 

With Daniel working wonders down there, and you making your way up his body, currently scraping your teeth over one of his nipples, he was scared of coming before he'd even had a chance to savour the experience. 

Daniel huffed under him, drawing his attention.  

Apparently his tongue could just about reach behind Oscar's balls, but the position didn't allow him to go any further. 

“Sit on my face”  Daniel panted. 

“What?” Oscar squeaked, sure he'd misheard. 

“You heard me, come here”  he slapped Oscar's thigh to get him to move. 

Oscar didn't hesitate for long, he swung a leg over Daniel's head and hovered, facing you as he bit his lip to hide just how aroused he was at the idea. 

Daniel wrapped his arms around Oscar's thighs and slammed him down onto his eagerly waiting mouth. 

Oscar let out a high pitched moan and had to stabilise himself with a hand on Daniel's chest. 

You grabbed his hair and pulled him in for a rough kiss. 

Daniel somehow had the dexterity to pound into you from below while eating Oscar out like his life depended on it, and all the two of you could do was pant into each other's mouths as Oscar came untouched all over Daniel's chest and his own hand. 

He crawled away, and Daniel grabbed your waist to pull you down onto his cock while he rolled his hips up into you. 

“You close, beautiful? You gonna come all over my cock?” 

You nodded desperately, the new angle and speed was making you cry out in pleasure as it built up rapidly inside you. 

“Do it then, show Oscar what a good girl you are and come right now, baby” 

How you managed to stay upright will always be a mystery. The force with which your orgasm washed over you was enough to make your voice crack and your vision go momentarily dark while you rode out the most intense pleasure you'd ever felt before. 

While you waited for the feeling in your legs to come back, Oscar went to grab a washcloth to clean you all up. 

You were lying on the bed, limbs akimbo while Daniel’s cum dribbled out of you. 

“Remind me to thank Mark Webber” you said and the other two guffawed in disbelief. 

“You want to thank him? What about us, we actually fucked you!” 

You laughed. “You're right! Maybe I should ask Mark to fuck me!” 

The other two groaned. 

“Never say that again” 

You all got into bed, you in the middle, facing Oscar while Daniel spooned you from behind. 

“Well at least now I know” Daniel muttered. 

“Know what?” you asked. 

“That Piastri likes getting his ass ate” he chuckled and you burst out in a fit of giggles. 

“Fuck you” Oscar groaned. 

“In your dreams Piastri” Daniel chuckled. 

“Next time, I'm fucking you” 

“Ha!” Daniel laughed “As if !” 

But you saw the defiant look in Oscar’s eyes. 

You knew him in and out, he was not going to back down from a challenge. 

[hersterical]

I’ve put a little too much thought into atla slang for gay people tonight so here’s this.

Kyoshi Island:

Speaks about sexuality openly on Kyoshi Island but knows to be more careful around outsiders.

“Is she, you know…a student of Rangi?” (gay/lesbian)

“No. But she does follow in the footsteps of Avatar Kyoshi. She prefers the versatility of the fan over the sword or the shield.” (bi)

Water Tribe:

More “traditional” than the other nations so it’s a bit more subtle and reliant on accompanying eyebrow movements, hand gestures, and tone of voice.

“He’d rather go sailing than stay in the village.” (mlm)

“She’s shown some interest in ice fishing.” (sapphic)

“I personally prefer to fish in the same waters as Avatar Kuruk.” (bi)

“He’d rather spend the winter months alone.” (ace)

Earth Kingdom:

“Are you a member of the Flying Opera Company?” (lgbt+)

No one, including the Kyoshi Islanders are aware of the origins of this particular phrase

Fire Nation:

“I’ve dabbled in dragon’s fire before.” (This phrase specifically would be something like ‘I did some experimenting in college’ but the reference to dragon’s fire/breath would mean lgbt+)

“He wears a crown of fire lilies.” (lgbt+)

Even before the hundred year war they were one of the more intolerant of the nations (based on the Kyoshi novels) and they probably only got worse during the hundred year war. I’m sure they would’ve come up with more slang by the time we get to Korra’s time but I’m out of ideas for the Fire Nation.

Air Nomads:

As they are totally open and accepting to all genders and sexualities they wouldn’t feel the need for coming up with specific labels, let alone weird secret codes and slang. When nomads begin exploring the world and start to learn about the other nation’s ideologies and slang and everything they’re always confused but respects the other nation’s traditions and cultures.

bonus

Swamp benders:

Even more open about gender and sexuality than Kyoshi Islanders. They’re super casual and blunt about it without being disrespectful but also not trying to be respectful because why would anyone be disrespectful about this? There’s a polycule consisting of roughly ten people who all connected through an asexual tribe member that each member of the polycule has a qpr with. Darryl over there is interested in folks of all sorts. His spouse is all the genders. Not to be confused with Jim over there who is none of the genders. Not to be confused with Junjun who is the third gender… (etc)

I didn’t do a big deep dive into each nation’s culture and history. This is just from the top of my head and is just for fun. Let me know if you guys have any other ideas!

[lukolathoughts]

Nicola loves the girls, the gays, and Luke Newton.

Dearest gentle readers,

Well! What an interesting few days. I'm not sure where to even start. I just want to let Jakeholes know, this isn't the blog for you, so it's best you move along now before you start foaming at the mouth.

In my first blog, I touched on subtext and reading between the lines. This is something I teach to my students and encourage their critical thinking skills. I will give out a photo and ask my students to 'infer' from what they can see in the photograph. 'Inference is a process of deriving logical conclusions from premises known or assumed to be true. It is also a guess or an opinion that is formed based on the information that you have.' In an exam, if I gave the students a photograph and they simply told me that all they could see was that the sky was blue, the grass was green, the lady is wearing a green coat and the man a hoodie and a baseball hat, they would not get very many marks.

However, if they described what they could 'infer' from the photo, such as that handhold does not look genuine and his fingers are stiff, their laughter seems over the top, the man isn't wearing a coat in January. They seem to be looking directly at the photographer, they never make eye contact in any of the photos. This would get them some more marks. Then if they went that one step further and asked WHY to all these points and backed it up with a statement explaining why - they would get even more marks. For example, why isn't the man wearing a coat in January? This could suggest the weather is not that cold in London at the moment, or the this picture might be from an earlier time period. They could look at the shop displays for evidence. Why does the lady never make eye contact with the man, could it infer that she is uncomfortable doing so or the thought never occurred to her? Why are they looking directly at the photographer? Could it possibly indicate they knew the paparazzi were there? And why would they want the paparazzi to take their photo's? What do you say to that class? Are they a couple happily in love? Write me a story on it, one, two, three go! They say a picture paints a thousand words.

Now since Deux Moi dropped the photos just as I was cooking the kid's tea (British slang for dinner) I have once again been glued to Twitter. I had to take a break for a bit and ensure my offspring didn't starve, but I thought oh god another shitshow and the day isn't even over. But I open Instagram and I swear I had the best laugh I have had all day really. I'm not sure when these photos were taken. The weather does look mild to be January and Jake is wearing a hoodie, but my husband is stupid like this and walks around in board shorts. In January. In Wales. When I tell you it's baltic cold, I mean it. But men apparently don't feel the cold especially if you're 24 and plastered to the side of your bestie or PR girlfriend, however you prefer. Us Brits love analysing the weather, probably because it's so shit here. So the timing is not really the issue for me. What made me laugh was was those two belly-laughing in some London alleyway looking like, 'look at us, we're so funny, everything is hilarious haha.' This was quite surprising to me as I genuinely did not realise Jake had a sense of humour, especially around Nic. What did she say that was so funny? We know she has the ability to make Luke belly laugh just by scratching her nose really. It was almost as if it was all a bit orchestrated for the cameras they were staring directly at. 'Smile and laugh for the camera Jake! You've been framed!'

So what was this? A PR set up that Nic and Jake were clearly aware of? Call me sceptical, but I've never seen anything so obviously fake and staged in all my life. Well except the motorbike segment on Graham Norton on the 13th of December last year. I have thought a lot about this and I know I might get some hate, but it's my opinion and I'm sorry Nic if you ever read this. Another thing us English teachers like to do is DESCRIBE things. Describe it to me Peter, or it didn't happen. Touch, smell, sound, taste, sight. Those are the five senses and if you write me a story, you bet your ass they better be in it or it's an F for you. So Nicola, describe to me how it felt racing through London on the back of a motorbike driven by a geriatric, Guinness drinking granddad (do you like my use of alliteration here fellow English teachers?). Graham Norton - 'we have a picture of you on the bike!' Erm, no you have a picture of Nicola stood next to the bike with her thumbs up. There was a video released by her PR company simultaneously that shows Nicola in a STUDIO sitting on the bike and it moving very, very slowly. We do not see her whizzing away up the road on the back of said bike into oblivion, screaming like Michelle Phieffer in Grease 2, clutching on to cool rider Guinness granddad for dear life. In fact, when asked about the experience she recalls literally nothing. If it was me, I'd have been like OMG Graham I almost died! The wind was howling, I was freezing, all I could hear was the rush of wind and the honking horns of cars. All I could see was the glare of lights and traffic and I tasted my own tears through fear.

Watch it if you don't believe me. There was nothing. Am I positive it didn't happen? Actually yes, show me the footage and I'll believe. Why did she go through this elaborate scheme? I have my theories and I will not share them here. I have said enough. But I did get an image in my mind of Luke in Rome rubbing his forehead and thinking, what is she up to now? He was probably secretly a bit proud.

Ok back to tonight's debacle. After the shit show that was Luke's disastrous family weekend than had more taps dripping than the Leaky Cauldron in Harry Potter, I find it highly convenient these photos drop today of all days. I know that Nicola HATES Deux Moi and the feeling I believe is mutual. Wouldn't DM have looked at these photos logically and thought, well these two look like besties out for a stroll? I suppose she does not care, whatever sells right? Was this to yet again spite Nicola?

Or was this Nicola who saw everything that Luke endured this weekend, and quietly told her PR team to 'drop' the photos of me with Jake to divert some attention away. Did she come charging in on her white horse (motorbike) to save the day? There is also the highly suspicious tanned photo of Nic at the WT premiere and then Luke's photo from the funeral, (I do not condone this by the way and I was upset for him this morning and his invasion of privacy) which also shows a bit of a red, sunburned face. Did Nicola once again panic and try to control the narrative? I am lately still picking up on her nervous, scared energy in my readings. She is very nine of swords in her head. Losing sleep etc.

I do love a good mystery and folks, I guess if you are reading this and nodding and not screaming obscenities at me through your screen, I guess you are stuck here with me on the ship for the long haul. I actually loved these photos tonight as it gave me a good laugh and and it proved to me even further that Jake is to Nic what Kurt Hummel is to Rachel Berry. Besties. It is also quite ironic that the first pap pics of them last October dropped the week his trailer for WT dropped and these photos land the week his film is released! What are the chances! Coincidence, Sherlock?

PS. No I do NOT believe Antonia was at Luke's family member's funeral. We have to stop treating this girl like the bogeyman. Let her go and live her life. Luke is living his I have no doubt.

PPS. It is not homophobic to recognise someone is gay. I INFER this from his own Instagram and his friends and partner's posts. I am fed up of being called homophobic when I have a lot of gay friends and two gay cousins.

PPPS. Luke and Nic sitting in a tree, KISSSING. I see you Nic, you savvy little mamma ;,)

[mymoshangthoughts]

okay, okay, okay, bear with me

mobei jun already knows about shang qinghua as airplane

oki ive decided to take advantage of the fact that WE NEVER GET A MOBEI JUN POV AND I'LL BE FORVER SALTY ABOUT THAT SHIT

but like, shen yuan figured airplane out REAL fast, right? they barely spent time together before the immortal alliance and then it takes one surprise before airplane is saying stupid shit, right?

and i cant help but think, mobei jun aint dumb and he's been spending How Many Years crashing at shang qinghua's leisure house whenever the fuck he feels like it?

he also finds shang qinghua to be Hella Sus because come on, ofc he does. a human just declares their undying loyalty to you after one fucking meeting??? even if he believes shang qinghua is being sincere in the moment, the fact that he was so quick to betray his sect doesnt speak of a loyal servant

so why wouldnt he snoop? why wouldnt he pay extra close attention when shang qinghua says shit that doesnt make sense? why wouldnt he notice when shang qinghua speaks or writes in a language that he doesnt recognize? airplane canonically isnt fluent in english so if he used a bit of it, especially chinglish, wouldnt mobei jun be able to learn some of the meanings of the words just by context clues? especially when he has YEARS to decode it? like if airplane was fluent, maybe he could hide the meaning, but a limited vocabulary adapted to another language isnt actually super hard to decode. it's the same reason that you can generally understand what slang means before you look up the definition. you might not know what 'rizz' means, but you can pick up the meaning from context clues.

anyway im over explaining the linguistic aspects ALL IM SAYING IS what if airplane kinda depends heavily on chinglish to be his Secret Language that Theres No Way That Anyone Here Can Get. and sure, for most people, it does seem like gibberish. but again, mobei jun has YEARS at his side and reasons to nitpick at it and decode it.

like what if airplane had a habit of writing out pidw plot points in chinglish bc look he is Going to forget shit no matter what, he wrote that novel a lifetime ago, but theres some info thats pretty important for him to Not Forget. so mobei jun is just left with a huge stash of Impossible Information that shang qinghua writes about

everything ranging from future events to obscure demon world facts that theres just no justifiable reason for shang qinghua to know about and just everything in between.

but also what if shang qinghua wrote his feelings? his thoughts? his issues? like cmon, he literally has NO ONE to consult with about the insanity of his life before cucumber-bro, and his life is really crazy, and he used to be the person who wrote out his feelings via novel but look dude he's not about to tempt fate by writing out another novel rn so a diary makes sense. or at least like, random venting

and again, this isnt even mentioning airplane having some potential verbal fuckups that mobei jun can add to his ever growing file of "shang qinghua has something fucking going on"

and like, maybe mobei jun hasnt actually figured out the exact truth but he has some eerily close guesses. or maybe airplane wrote a lengthy journal explaining literally his entire fucked up life and mobei jun knows Everything.

look im just a little bit obsessed with mobei jun casually being aware for YEARS that shang qinghua is from another world and might have once had god-like powers over this world. i think this is very funny and i think it could work in a canon compliant way. cuz i also like to think that some of mobei jun's aggro at shang qinghua was a mixture of

you literally wont tell me who you really are. you claim to be my loyal subject but you wont even tell me your real name and Yes I'm Upset About That

you fucking fucker, you literally PLANNED that horrible event to happen???? you suck so bad omfg. THAT WAS TRAUMATIZING FOR ME YOU JERK NO I DONT CARE IF YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT IT NOW

your handwriting sucks and im mad that i didnt just have to decode your weird other language, i also had to decode your fucking horrendous handwriting and i dont know if i can ever forgive you for that

you barely ever show your real personality in front of me and i have to learn how you really feel by reading this fucking notes and YES IM UPSET ABOUT THAT

i also just love the idea of Something Happening to do with the multiverse and basically mobei jun is the only one who isnt remotely surprised lmfao. binghe is in crisis mode, cucumber thinks he's gonna die, airplane is freaked out, and mobei jun is just like "yeah, figured some dumb shit like this might happen. you didnt know binghe? dont you pay any attention to your husband :/ dude, they're not even good at hiding it, i thought you were supposed to be smart"

also the simultaneous heartattacks that cucumber and airplane would have that mobei jun just KNOWS like thats hilarious. imagine they need to talk about something secretly in public and its super urgent and mobei jun just starts using chinglish or webspeak or something perfectly and cumplane are FREAKING THE FUCK OUT

mobei jun: that mofo is hella sus, but keep it on the dl. ttyl i need to do a vibe check

cumplane: ?!?!?!?!?!?

[ghostbsuter]

This is the fourth time damian brought the college student over.

Damian, despite being 14, has been accepted to a gifted school as he had already been taught in the most subjects one usually learns at a slower pace.

(He still gets a headache over the fact his son won't get a normal childhood.)

Which is how he befriended the 17 year old Daniel, an overworked and sleepdeprived college student, getting dragged along and following with no complaint.

Bruce is, even if he wanted damian to befriend someone more around his own age, very welcoming of the student.

Alfred made sure the boy took enough food with him home, always leaving the mansion at point 4 pm.

It really shouldn't have been surprising when Bruce Wayne, yes, THE Brucie Wayne, summoned him to his office.

Danny entered the room fidgeting, giving a nervous smile to the man behind the desk and questioning what he did wrong to offend the patriarch of the family.

(Lies and slander, we, the readers, are fully aware that Alfred is the patriarch.)

"Uh— hi, Mr. Wayne." He sat when gestured to the chair, shitting bricks with how nervous he's.

The man nods in greeting, smiling. "Hello Danny–"

"Please don't kill me!" The teen in question blurts out, flushing in embarrassment once registered.

Taken aback and startled, Bruce snorts, stifling laughter by putting a hand against his mouth.

Shit.

"I don't know what I did! Very sorry if I offended someone!" He rambles, panicking and waving his hands around.

"Danny—"

"I must have done something! Why else would you call me? Oh god– I'm gonna be murdered by THE Brucie Wayne!"

At this point, the rich guy in front of him is barely restraining himself from laughing, trying his best to stay professional.

"Danny–! I- I won't murder you." He reassured, eyes crinkling from smiling.

"But–" he sniffs, both embarrassed and teary.

"I'm not gonna— danny." Bruce sighs, which sounds a lot like a choke, really. "Look, I just wanted a 1-on-1 talk with you about your friendship with damian and some concerns."

"Oh."

"Yes, oh."

Danny sighs in relief at this. "I can do some good old interrogation–" "it's not an interrogation–" "totally interrogation."

He huffs lightly, getting comfortable in his chair and preparing himself mentally.

"Alright Mr. Wayne! Shoot me!"

(Was that a pun? A joke to murder? Really?)

The man clears his throat, straightens his back and looks serious as he was before the accusations of murder.

"What are your intentions with damian and why become friends in the first place?"

Blinking, the teen brightens. "Oh, that's easy! Damian needs a friend. We just kinda clicked after I scared away a few pesky bullies."

Then he shrugs. "Besides, it's great training."

"Training?" Bruce asks, curious, tone light in the way that shows he's very interested.

"Yes. Despite his badly hidden murderous tendencies, love for knives, and slight lack of slang language and knowledge, he's still a kid." He nods.

"A young teen that goes through teen stuff that I barely remember going through and now get to relearn will be handy once Ellie becomes a teenager herself."

Batman was filing the information away, but Bruce kept going.

"Ellie?" He questions.

"My daughter– has damian not mentioned her? We always leave around 4 to get her from my sister. Sometimes, dami stays over for a few hours!"

Ah. Well. Seems like Alfred will have to make more food for the teen now.

"Would you like to stay for dinner today?" He asks, "Bring your daughter too. We won't mind you joining us." smiling and already planning for the new adjustments to make.

"On another note, what are your and your daughters preferences? Any allergies?"

Danny didn't even agree yet, not that he was gonna— mind you.

"No allergies, soft foods only, easy to eat." He answers, listing the stuff from the top of his head.

In a whirlwind of– of planning dinner?? Danny is out of the door and wide eyed.

"What just happened?"

(On the other side, Bruce face-palms, having forgotten to ask what age Ellie is. Damn in Bruce.)

—

On the fifth visit, Danny stayed for dinner.

Damian must know the age, for there are bowls with freshly cut fruits, yoghurt, and rice mixed with veggies and chicken.

On that note, where is damian?

Dick meets his eyes, asking the same quetsion with a look.

Just as Bruce was gonna ask, the door opened, and the cutest picture to ever exist was created.

(Dick RIPPED his phone out of his pocket, swiping a picture of the scene as fast as possible.)

Steph can't hold back the coos at the sight of Damian walking with a toddler into the dining room, her tiny feet propped up on his and in hand together.

She's wearing a Robin onesie and he is wearing his (stolen) Nightwing hoodie.

"Sorry, hope we aren't late!" Danny waves with a grin from behind the pair.

"You aren't, just perfect, in fact." Bruce reassures, waving the teens over to the free seats.

Damian leads the two to his seat, making sure they're next to him.

The conversation during dinner is one spoken fondly, Cass likes to make Ellie laugh with silly faces, Duke and Steph "secretly" feed her tiny pieces of strawberry and Dick is in a rather passionate discussion with both Tim and Danny.

Damian, once he makes sure no one is watching him, wipes the mess from Ellies face.

(Bruce was watching, looking away once damians face snapped to him. He wasn't aware his youngest had such a soft spot for toddlers.)

(It takes a while, but Danny and Ellie become family like every other person, while having not slept over yet, Alfred already has prepared a room for the two in the Family wing.)

(It's barely a week after that everyone bought and gifted him onesie's of their hero personas, with the excuse of them being the gotham vigilantes when questioned. After all, the Robin can't be a one man team.)

—

The Nightwing and his Robin.

[love-bitesx]

: ̗̀➛ PROTECTOR. hobie brown x reader

summary: spider-man makes a point of walking y/n home every night, but after befriending them as hobie brown as well, his feelings get complicated. words: 3.5k REQUESTS OPEN ! warnings: non-explicit sexual harassment (a man is very creepy to reader), reader isn't gendered! but be aware, author is female, so possible afab bias, i tried my hardest i swear. all characters are adults :) author is british so this is my interpretation of his silly little slang from what ive experienced hehe also divider credit: cafekitsune a/n: may feel a little ooc, but in my headcanon, when he's pining the way he is for reader, he's so soft. also, spider-man and hobie r completely different personalities u cant tell me otherwise. first time writing hobie so pls give me opinions ty. enjoy!!!!!

“is it home-time already, darlin’?”

there he was. the familiarity of routine washing over you, turning your head to see him propped up against the brick, spikes on display and guitar pick flipping in between his clothed fingers.

“spider-man, my hero,” you sighed and clutched your non-existent pearls, a smirk on your lips.

“you know i hate that,” kicking off from the wall of the pub you just clocked out of, he stuffed his hands into his patched up jacket, his bouncy stride meeting yours on the pavement.

“i know,” you smiled, allowing your bag to fall from your shoulders and into his outstretched hand, as always.

it had become a routine, over the course of a few months, that the one-and-only spider-man would escort you home from work in the late hours. at first, it didn’t seem real. why would he decide to spend valuable time most days walking you home, when he could be out fighting whatever darkness lurks in the shadows? you’ve asked him, almost every time, but he always gives the same, vague answer;

“who else is gonna keep you safe, love?”

his legs were longer than yours, by a mile. so he had to slow his usual pace for you. naturally bouncy, his booted feet tapped against the pavement like a kick drum, and you wondered whether that was the radioactive blood in his veins, or his natural energy.

laughter flittered through the dark streets as you caught up, it had only been a day since you last saw him, but being a crime-fighting, fascist-killing superhero, there was quite a lot to pack into a 24 hour day.

he bounced off the walls of passing buildings, recreating his fights with the air that hung between you both, throwing in some exaggerated punches here and there, to elicit an extra giggle or two from you. you almost got lost following his animated recreations, but he kept an eye out for the roads ahead. he’d memorised all the paths leading to your apartment.

it had all started a few months prior, after a particularly long shift at work. constantly over the span of a few hours, this guy would not leave you alone. no matter how many times you refused his advances, a smile on your face, masking the unsettling pit in your stomach at the sight of his grin. drink, after drink, after drink, he ordered just to stare at you the whole night, crude gestures and words thrown your way.

you’d gotten used to it, working at a pub in the depths of london, it wasn’t ever unusual to get unwanted advances. but something about this guy, you couldn’t shake it. ~

“what time do you finish, ay?” his accent was thick, you placed him somewhere up north.

“i’m not sure,” you muttered back, forcing a smile.

“oi, come on! ‘course you know what time you finish,” his words were slurred, and his eyes hadn’t left yours once, “was thinking we could ‘ave some drinks together, tha’s’all.”

“sorry, i can’t tonight, i have to be up early tomorrow,” you giggled, and if he wasn’t so drunk, he’d definitely have picked up on the nerves lacing your words.

“come on,” vowels drawn out, he made an attempt to stand up to meet your height, the proximity of him sending a shock of fear to your heart, until a strong hand clapped against his chest, the force almost sending him backwards.

“pack it in, dickhead, they said ‘no’,” a deep, almost calming voice spoke, contrasted completely with the stern, threatening tone of his words.

you looked to meet your protectors gaze, and it almost stunned you. he was tall, taller than you, for sure. dark, smooth skin with an aura of pure mayhem, silver piercings protruding from his face. adorned with a ripped, skin-tight plain top and denim vest, littered with badges, patches and just about any accessory known to man.

his eyes were what really held you. a heavy look, dark brown with the most unique feeling of strength and power that you’d ever seen. you could’ve easily gotten lost.

deciding you’d stared at him long enough, though, you broke the eye contact, diverting it back to the man who looked a humorous combination of terrified and offended at the same time.

“‘s alright mate, we were just talking, back off, yeah?” his liquid courage built up, ignorant of the taller man’s hand still pushing against his chest, ring-clad hands seeming to leave an imprint.

“think it’s time for you to leave, mate,” he spat back, mimicking his slang.

a moment of silence followed. you’d fully expected the drunken creep to swing a punch, or at least bite back, but under the weight of the taller man’s stare, he seemed to lose all fight he had in him. with a final murmer of something you couldn’t quite hear, and unsure you really wanted to, he stumbled backwards, slipping into the crowd.

“thank you,” you broke the silence, to which the man shrugged.

“he was a pig,” he brushed it off like nothing, and you couldn’t help but smile at his attitude. raising his newly free hand, he stretched it towards you, tight in a fist.

“hobie, hobie brown,” he greeted, and his accent completely erased the ‘h’ from his name.

“y/n l/n,” you smiled, accepting his offer and spudding him, the cold metal of his rings against your knuckles. you couldn’t help but grin at the oddity of his presence.

hobie kept you company for the rest of the night, ranting about his thoughts and opinions of various important subjects, ranging widely from drinks of choice to the existence of capitalist propaganda in modern media, all of which you hung onto every word of.

it wasn’t long until he’d managed to book him and his band into a few slots on the pub’s makeshift stage that stood empty on the other side of the room, smiling to himself at how authentically excited you seemed to hear his music.

when he left, his vacancy was immediately obvious. the booming pub feeling oddly silent without him.

after closing up for the night, you grabbed your bag and slung it over your shoulder, switching the lights off with one hand and fiddling with the keys in the other, shaking the door to double check you locked it well enough. body aching from being on your feet all day, you yawned, stepping autopilot into the darkness. the night air was chilling, causing you to wrap your jacket tight around your body. cursing at yourself for not bringing another layer, or pre-ordering a taxi home.

“oi,” you heard from your right, turning quickly to the familiar call.

stumbling on the pavement, the drunken creep from earlier pointed towards you.

shit.

you hadn’t expected him to actually wait for you. it’d been hours since he left, he was insane. what was he thinking?

grabbing the keys from your pocket, you gripped them in your freezing hands in defense.

“where’s your little friend, huh?” he spat, clearly enraged by hobie’s interruption earlier. he stepped closer, and you stepped back, trembling as you tripped slightly on the pavement.

“ay, is this twat bothering you?” a voice called from above.

wait, above?

craning your neck up, you made eye contact with possibly the last person you expected.

“spider-man?”

and from that night, he’d met you every time. waiting outside the pub doors, no exception, to walk you home.

“hey!” spider-man’s upbeat calling snapped you instantly back to him, jumping slightly as you finally noticed he was directly in front of your face, white eyes narrowed on your demeanor, “where’d you go, huh?”

“sorry,” paying him an apologetic smile, “just thinking.”

“wanna clue me in, darlin’?” his tone was playful, but the soften of his masks expression felt genuine.

“just thinking about the day i’ve had,” you lied, unsure whether his spidey senses could tell. not that it was rare for you to think about how you met, but you didn’t want to bring it up again. if he could tell, he didn’t let on.

“whataboutit?” he sped up, slipping back to your pace and slinging his lanky arm over your shoulders, basically hanging onto you as you walked. he liked walking with you like this. it made him feel powerful, like he was keeping you extra safe.

“hobie’s band played again!” you exclaimed, and if he’d been paying attention, he would’ve seen the way your face lit up at the memory. unfortunately for him, his eyes were trained on webbing a chocolate bar from a passing vendor. god knows why it was still open, but he was glad it was.

“hobie, again, huh?” taunted spider-man, punching your arm playfully with the fist that gripped the newly stolen snickers bar, “starting to think you’re replacing me, love.”

“never,” you teased back, elbowing his side, hearing the jingle of his badged vest, “hobie’s just…”

ears pricking, he clung onto the words you were speaking, anticipating possibly hearing something he didn’t want to.

“he’s just so cool,” you breathed with a smile, and he almost verbally sighed in relief, stopping himself in order not to rouse suspicion. he smirked under his mask, “just got this feel about him, so easy to talk to, and he’s so talented! you know, i’ve almost learnt all the lyrics to his songs.”

his heart just about exploded. in fact, he thinks he could pinpoint the exact moment it did.

he played off his burning cheeks, clearing his throat and incredibly glad his mask hid his flustered expression.

“you should come see him, you know,” you looked up at him, and though you knew his answer was ‘no’, it was worth a try, “i can hide you in the back if you don’t wanna be seen.”

“come off it, love,” he dismissed, avoiding your gaze, but his back was tingling like pins and needles under the warmth of it, “i’m not keen to meet the man stealing you from me.”

“fuck sake,” you laughed and pushed his arm off you, brushing off his playful flirting.

his confidence was excelling. the friendship you had formed over the prior months had stemmed from his childish charm, and it hadn’t faltered once.

“well, here i am,” you brought your pace to a halt, hovering in front of the door to your apartment building.

“i’ll miss you tonight,” he fell against the wall, eyes stuck on you. you couldn’t see it, but you could feel his smirk.

“i’ll see you tomorrow, i finish at 11,” you stepped towards him.

“i’ll be waiting,” he kicked off from the bricks, raising his hand to ruffle your hair, much to your protest, before practically disappearing in front of your eyes.

you were left grinning to yourself, much like every night.

“what’s up, bruv?” hobie’s friend elbowed him harshly in the ribs, causing him to rip his eyes from you.

“nothing,” he huffed, but by the lack of sustenance and playfulness in his reply, his friend was less than satisfied. hobie was a carefree, reckless guy with a constant spurt of irony, and seeing him with a sullen expression and no bite back, was worrying.

“come off it, hobie,” another one piped up, sitting across from him with an empty pint in one hand and cigarette in the other, pointing the latter in his face. he huffed, “you’ve been slumping for like 3 months now, and you’ve only been writing sappy love songs.”

the table snickered, and even hobie’s lips curled into a smirk. his friend was right, he wasn’t even nearly like his usual self. he blames you for that.

“who is it then, huh?” his friend pushed, cigarette still hanging in front of hobie’s face, ash crumbling off the end, “has our ol’ hobie brown got himself a partner?”

“oi, you know i hate labels,” he smirked again, knowing he was lying. not that he didn’t usually hate them, but he couldn’t avoid the fact that every time you made your way to the front of his mind, he was urged to call you his. his partner. his person. his love. just his.

he always did hate consistency, anyway.

“another round, guys?” your voice ripped him from his thoughts, your scent somehow drifting above the sticky smell of beer and cigarettes, he pinned that down to his spider abilities, but he’d be a fool to ignore that he had simply just memorised the aroma.

“please, darlin’,” hobie’s friends chirped up, grinning at you thankfully. he cursed the burning feeling in his chest.

“i could do you guys a deal,” you smirked playfully, and he looked up to meet your eyes. you looked beautiful tonight, like usual. he was fucked.

“if you lot give us a song, it’ll be on the house,” you smiled hopefully, taking note of their usual orders just incase they agree.

“sounds like a plan,” hobie reached his hand out to you, open for a handshake, to which you took. soft hands falling into his calloused ones, he couldn’t help but notice how nice it felt.

turning away, you left to get their usual set up sorted, feeling him still watching you, to which you threw him a smile over your shoulder.

it wasn’t unusual at all. his eyes would always find you. at the table with his mates, his gaze would swim through the crowd to yours. even on stage, lost in the moment with himself and his guitar, it was you he always found his eyes trailing back to. it wasn’t like the other men in the bar, it wasn’t predatory desire or lust, but it was warm. it was safe.

he had three options, really; confess himself to you as hobie brown, coming clean about the way he felt about you, the warmth in his heart that spread across his spine whenever you smiled at him, eventually having to come clean about his alter-ego. he could confess as spider-man, to which he’d have to come clean about his actual identity. or option three. stay silent and suffer in his own pity. bite his lip and pretend his heart wasn’t yearning for you.

but, he prided himself in being able to speak his mind without hesitation. confident in his word, suffocated in his silence. he would always say: if he ever bit his tongue, to kill him there and then. well, here he is; begging for mercy at the barrel, his tongue bleeding from keeping his heart locked in his chest.

he was fucked. well and truly.

“anything special happen today?” spider-man nudged you, taking a worried note of your unusual quietness recently. it was the same night, he’d picked you up like normal, and hopped along beside you.

“the band played again,” a swelling smile bloomed on your lips, “other than that, not really.”

your voice was hollow tonight. easily mistakable with your naturally soft tone, but to his trained ears, it didn’t feel right.

stopping immediately in his path, his bouncy steps ceasing, you quickly copied him. confusion slipping behind your eyes.

“what’s up?” you questioned.

“you know you wanna tell me,” he stepped around you, arms falling over your shoulders from behind, heavy with his full weight. something about the mask, it gave him a confidence with you that he’d quenched as hobie.

you sighed and rested your head back against his chest, taking him by surprise. there was something intimate about the way your eyes were closed, body resting against him. your brain was hectic, he didn’t need his spidey senses to see that.

“there’s just…” you spoke, eyelids feeling heavy as you opened them, looking up to see him. head split in two, you were unsure if you even wanted to say it out loud, “there’s this guy.”

it was almost cruel how fast his heart dropped, plummeting like a boulder into the pit of his stomach. body stiffening, his head was spinning so fast he didn’t even have the conscience to mask it.

“i just can’t get him out of my head, it’s so stupid,” if your wistful look wasn’t answer enough, the outpour of dissonance he could feel from your body told him it was serious.

“not another fella tryna steal you from me,” he chuckled, but his voice was weak, vulnerable. you hadn’t heard it like that before.

untangling yourself from his weighted grip, you leant against the wall of the building you were stood in front of, staring up into the night sky. there was something so embarrassing about admitting a silly little crush.

“not another one, technically,” you spoke softly, a hint of a smile tickling your lips at the thought of him, he stepped closer, “i’ve already told you about him.”

and he stopped dead in his tracks. mind racing a million miles an hour, picking apart every word you said. was he stupid? was he reaching? seeing something that wasn’t there? he was the only one you’d spoken about, but surely not, right?

shifting closer again, his body begun to feel the heat radiating off you, barely an inch between you both. he towered you, as always, the spikes on his jacket and mask hitting the streetlights perfectly, giving him an orange glow. you bought yourself to look at him, and though you couldn’t see the eyes beneath, you felt his gaze.

insufferably close, closer than you’ve ever been, you could feel your heart in your chest. a tension that you hadn’t quite felt before, bubbling in the air between you.

“say his name, love,” his voice was low, lower than normal, and a twinge of familiarity hit your chest hearing the deeper tone, one you couldn’t quite pinpoint. chills dripped down your spine at the new found feeling.

gulping, you could feel his name in your throat, struggling it’s way out.

“hobie.” your voice was barely above a whisper, but considering he almost had you pressed against the brick, he heard every syllable. and god, did it sound good.

“again?” he croaked, just wanting to confirm, needing to hear it again, needing to hear you say it, relish in every beat.

“hobie,” you repeated, louder this time, more conviction in your chest, “i like him, like a lot.”

he went silent. dead silent, barely moving. heat radiated from him, and you could’ve sworn in the vacancy of sound that you could hear his heart pounding against his chest. reaching up, your hand trembling slightly, you placed it there. on his chest, feeling the material of his suit, the humanity of his heartbeat. he melted into it.

“are you o—“

“i need to tell you something.” he interrupted you.

it was your turn to be silent, eyes heavy with intrigue, begging him to continue.

without a word, his ring-clad hand ghosted your skin, drifting past the air between you and to the base of his mask, sliding along his neckline for the seam, and dragging it up over his face, revealing the man within.

your heart stopped, a thousand things flashing through your head, through your heart, surging in your bloodstream. you didn’t even know what to say, what to think, how to comprehend it.

“hobie?” your voice was small again, shrunk beneath the look in his eyes, the desire.

embarrassment waved through you for a moment, a sudden panic of the earlier confession, your chest pounding at the possible rejection.

he didn’t even leave the thoughts enough time to fester, however, because his hand that was holding his mask was suddenly flush against your jaw, the material falling softly onto your neck. thumb trailing the comfort of your cheek, revelling in the feel of your skin, warm against his hands, he leaned forward.

his lips were on yours, without a word. gentle, but rough. the tension escaping through the feeling of him pressed into you, desire leaping out of every shared breath. his other hand fell to your waist, and yours stayed firm on his chest, bunching the fabric in your hand to bring him closer. he obliged, of course, and the kiss deepened. his head spun.

pulling away for breath, you kept your eyes on his lips, disbelief swimming around your brain, colliding with the need to kiss him again.

“y/n,” his hand brought your eyeline to his, “i like you, too.”

you couldn’t help but smile, relief washing your body out.

“like, a lot.”

he kissed you again. and again.

a/n: hope u enjoyed!! pls let me kno if ur did, this is my first time writing for him <3 thanku!!!

[olderthannetfic]

Normally I don't do the "he would not fucking say that" thing but when I hear 2025 slang come out of the mouth of someone who is in the 1980's. I don't know if "a touch of the 'tism" was a way to refer to autistic people earlier than I became aware of it but I can promise you, if it's coming out of the mouths of the most terminally online people you can find in 2025, it's not period-accurate to 1982. I don't demand every song be period accurate or every reference be accurate to the month in which a thing takes place but can we fucking get the decade right, at least?

--

*cackling*

Also, in the way that "a touch of the 'tism" typically gets used, at least that I've seen, there is no period-accurate way to express that. People were not aware of neurodivergence where you're still functional and it's fine in that way in 1982.

...

Wait, I lie.

It would be phrased as "I love Worldcon."

[puc-puggy]

really fascinated with deadpool & wolverine less as a movie and more as a corporate response to the growing insecurity in relating to and creating meaningful art. like, never have we been more aware of the impact that the relationship between art and artist is oppressively mediated by Corporation than right now with marvel, whose movies grow continually worse and more forgettable under growing corporate control, and this movie bears the weight of a particularly complicated and contentious merger. what they decided to do about it is just. fascinating. disturbing, but fascinating.

the movie is incredibly aware that it is a Product and seems to have completely sidestepped any attempt at meaningful storyline in lieu of packing as much Content into 2.5 hours as possible. and I mean Content. they broke him up with his girl & separated him from all his meaningful character connections, then sent him through a very funny but disjointed and lackluster plot, putting all the meat in nostalgic character interactions or gratuitous fan-pleaser match-ups that can work as tiktok clips. don't get me wrong, i'm a basic x-men bitch. wolverine is one of my all time favorites, especially early angry fucked up alcoholic logan. i gasped at elektra and straight up screamed when wesley snipes came into frame. I laughed out loud at the list of cocaine slang terms disney apparently has. it was fun! it succeeded in making me not mind that it was barely a movie.

and that's the rub, isn't it? it was barely a movie, and it knows it’s barely a movie. but it still has to connect with its audience somehow. and that, i think, is what's really fascinating. it forges its connection with the audience not by building characters or stakes and giving any of them genuinely grounded emotional arcs but by using a fourth-wall breaking character to commiserate with the audience about the impact of corporate ownership & profit on their relationship and access to the stories we love. while being the impact of corporate consolidation on stories you love.

deadpool makes jokes about his stupid villain and mcguffin machine, but the plot is still motivated by a stupid villain and a mcguffin machine. he jokes about being banned from doing cocaine on screen & does not do cocaine on screen because he can't. the corporation that now owns his IP has deemed it against their values. he jokes about what things "have to happen" in the movie because there is actually a list that they were given. as a friend pointed out, “the climax was exactly as contrived as it needed to be to make it a statement: ‘you see how this barely-fleshed-out villain character is just gonna kinda stand there in front of the macguffin machine for as long as we need her to so that we can have the conversations and tropes and results we want? yeah we're just gonna do that. we're gonna keep cutting back to her just standing there going Mmmmm mwah haha to specifically highlight how dumb it is. On purpose.’”

by embedding it in the plot with a character that breaks the fourth wall, the movie stops being “about” the plot on screen and starts being “about” the collective relationship to the characters, embodied by ryan reynolds, whose personal desire for a good deadpool & wolverine movie motivated by his pure love for deadpool is the mythological origin of the movie, and who was allowed to break character and say as himself to hugh jackman as wolverine “you have no idea how long i’ve been waiting for this.” he’s turned into a sort of avatar of the pure fan, who’s there to love the character and have fun and isn’t too bothered by logistics and legalities. it wants you to feel like deadpool also hates it when stories get shuffled because of corporate stockowners, like this extremely expensive bullshit is his personal protest and he's going to give them a proper sendoff & ryan reynolds was around to hold everyone up to standard. the corporation soothing the audience and fan that people who love the stories are ‘in charge’ enough to create a good time, lowering your standards and expectations of a story to what’s profitable for them to create.

kind of genius.

[kanmom51]

Pool fun Jeju day 2 (Episode 5)

Or

What JM gets up to when he has a proper wall to hide behind

or

JK is JM's toy - he told us so himself

or

Do we play the "find the couple" game again?

With those three alternative headers do I really need to write a post? 🤣🤣

Probably not. But where's the fun in that?

I guess we need to cut this into 3 parts. In the pool, out of the pool and back in the house. Or, during, after and after after, or, and this is the one I love the most, naughty JM, payback JK and double payback JM.

In the pool

There aren't enough WTFs in the world to throw at whatever was going on with those two in that pool. And yes, I am very much aware of the fact that there were actually 3 people in that pool. Not sure JM and JK were though, lol.

What strikes me funny is that we got to see way more sus Jikookery when Tae was around than when he wasn't. Maybe it was because having Tae there as a buffer made it easier to play the deniability card, maybe it was because they allowed themselves to be like that, again, because of that buffer called "the guest", lol. And maybe, just maybe, any "too friendly" activity on the first night found it's way onto the editing floor, figuratively, because, once again, it was way harder to explain it away.

Basically, with "the guest" involved in the games it's easier for all parties involved to push the boundaries without it being too much for the audiences 'allergic to queer' sensitive stomachs.

Whatever whichever, JM was in a mood. Clearly feeling MUCH better than he did the day before and out to get HIS!

Oh JM darling, your naughty naughty side is showing.

Same side a glass wall prevented us from seeing just the night before.

He was all in. Deep.

What was he up to there?

Why? Why the cut????

The amount of cuts going on. Dudes, enough with denying us!!

and this one.

Funny how there is no need to cut out the parts JK is going for Tae, lol.

And this cut here.

Once again JM getting handsy there. And if there was any kind of 'retaliation' the editors decided it was not meant for our eyes, lol.

It's bad enough those two (as in JM and JK) made sure to do his naughty behind a wall. Do they have to cut all the fun out? Well, not all the fun, but the juicy parts of it?

And then, after all those cuts this is what they decide to leave in?

Wtf was this all about?

On second thought, perhaps it's better you don't tell me, lol.

But before I do move on, do I mention that the way JK went for JM's hair like that and the way JM had no problem with it feels like this isn't their first rodeo?

Do I mention that?

🤔

Oh, and btw did JM and JK exchange their swimming trunks here? Either they did or they each got 2 pairs to start with (I'm going with option 1).

There was much more fun going on in that pool, much of which we didn't get to see. A lot of it just the two of them with their shenanigans and Tae being a spectator and some with Tae playing the games with them as well. Tae leaves the pool with the two still in it, we don't know if they stayed and for how long as that's when the editors decide we've seen enough pool play for one episode, lol.

Out of the pool

This is the JK payback part of things, lol.

See, JM needs to be punished for being such a tease.

JK locking JM out. making sure he locks every single door.

The playfulness.

The cheekiness.

For instance, what was this?

Was JM saying something? Mouthing something? Or was that him trying to flirt his way in?

And that wink.

And let's talk about this:

The 5412.

I really wasn't going to talk about it, but seeing that I've had a couple of asks about it, I'll sum it up in a couple of words.

I'll start by saying that I don't speak Korean, nor do I have knowledge of Korean slang. And as such all I can do is rely on others translations.

There are a couple of versions as to what it meant.

JM clearly signed 5412. There is no confusion there.

The question is what does it mean, or what did JM mean by it in the context of the situation?

Of course I've seen the "I love you" explanation. But other than the original account posting this explanation, not only have I not seen corroboration to it, but mostly other accounts either outright contradict it or just give another possible explanation.

Like this one:

And this is basically the same:

I can only assume that if indeed JM was saying "I love you" that the K-JKKs would be going wild (in their own cryptic way of course), which they aren't. Well, not about the 5412 thing in any case. So, I will be playing it safe here and going with it either being a way to signal JK to open the door or some other message that is for them to know and us to not.

But those two and their sus behaviour were enough to drive us wild anyway.

Back in the house

Towel battle.

And yes, JK supposedly started this.

But did he?

And I ask that because of this here:

Did you see it?

That was the full scene.

So I will tell you the 2 things I see here.

This is the 1st:

Look carefully.

JM is hitting JK's back.

When you watch the original with the sound you can literally hear the smack on JK's skin.

OMG < the abused becomes the abuser>

Bull bloody crap.

This is them being their own playful self, JM's response to being locked out by his naughty bf.

So yeah, maybe JK was the first to throw in the towel, or more so to throw the towel at JM, but he definitely was not the first to smack. And low and behold, he doesn't flinch from that smack.

And then there is this too:

JM looking JK over with intent, hands lifting towards JK and.... cut!!

Again they deprive us.

Going from JK drying himself to JK's towel suddenly all rolled up and ready to strike.

And then the 'battle' begins.

It amazes me time and time again how those two manage to find joy in just about anything, even supposedly mundane moments. Calm joy, just sitting there with each other. Chaotic joy, with their playfulness and outright chaos and mischief.

JM the trickster, lol.

And what do we make of JM commanding "STAY" to JK ?

I think I'll leave you with that. Food for thought.

I will just say one thing before I go:

People need to stop looking at them like cardboard cutouts. These are two complex human beings. Fully grown adults. Young adults, but still adults. And they are both of strong character. They know what they want and who they want. And they know how to express themselves and stand up for what they want. Even more so with each other. Those two know each other through and through. Anyone that thinks they have the right to insert themselves into those two's relationship and call out one of them for their behavior with the other need to just go...

Away...

Maybe get a life...

Maybe touch some grass...

Maybe just piss off.

Whichever it is, they need to leave these two alone. Because they can scream blue murder as much as they want, at the end of the day these two will choose each other over anything and anyone.

And let me say that once more with feeling:

They CHOSE and will keep on CHOOSING each other.

[shaunamilfman]

Being Jackieshauna's Controversially Young GF

pairing: jackie taylor x r / shauna shipman x r note: yes, i will always manage to make it about jackieshauna.

Jackie definitely brings a “we saw you from across the club and loved your vibe” energy to the party, and you’re just kind of glancing at Shauna glaring at you over her shoulder. like, does her ass know that? Shauna’s all for it, but the glower takes breaks for no one.

Shauna loudly refers to you as their daughter at least once to embarrass Jackie. preferably right after she’s kissed you in the grocery store. Jackie tells her off for the whole drive back, but Shauna's ass does not care. hands at ten and two on the wheel and the smuggest fucking look on her face. loses the attitude when Jackie starts throwing blankets on the couch, but it’s over for her at that point.

Jackie’s introducing you to all her friends without shame, and Shauna’s just daring someone to say something.

You start to wonder if Shauna’s main reason for dating you is all the opportunities it gives her to embarrass Jackie. One of their friends asks where you met, and Shauna says something like, “Jackie stole her from the cradle.” Jackie’s over there doing a spittake as she nearly chokes on her wine. she just loves to make Jackie squirm.

Now, if someone else makes a comment about it? Jackie’s going to have to drag her out of there or blood’s going to be spilled.

Jackie insists on making you watch the "classics," but it’s mostly just beaches over and over again. she refuses to move on. Shauna’s three glasses of wine in before the movie even starts. she’s seen it so many times she can recite it line by line.

Shauna throws Star Wars in there, but it’s mostly just because she knows Jackie's sick and tired of watching it. Shauna's got to get revenge somehow.

Shauna comes up behind you and just stands there, glaring at anyone that tries to approach you. God forbid you mention having to meet someone at the library for a project. you’ve never heard a more terrifying “Oh?” in your entire life. she’s dropping you off in her little minivan like your a child. talking about “I’ll be back in two hours.”

Jackie consistently tries to match your schedule to stay up with you, but it's always lights out for her at 10 PM sharp, no matter how hard she tries. she’s so competitive with it though, so sometimes the two of you just have to pretend you’re going to sleep so that Jackie won’t be an absolute nightmare in the morning. she wakes up once to find you in the living room doing something else after you've “gone to sleep” and won’t speak to you for at least a day.

Shauna likes to teach you how to cook (spices who? ), but Jackie always hovers around giving bad advice. They end up bickering about it every time, and the food gets burned. Shauna’s so frustrated she can barely look at Jackie, and Jackie’s ass is skipping over to the takeout menu drawer.

Jackie and Shauna have separate bank accounts just so Jackie can make Shauna pay for dates still. It’s the small things.

Shauna’s more self-conscious about initiating PDA, given that she’s a lot more aware of the age difference in a way. Jackie’s always the one to initiate it first; whether it’s holding your hand or practically climbing on top of you, trust that Jackie does not care.

Jackie’s way too invested in any of your friend group gossip. she’s expecting daily updates. Shauna “doesn’t care” and yet still knows every detail. interesting.

Any argument Jackie is losing, she pulls the “listen to your elders” card. It’s the only time you’re ever allowed to acknowledge that she’s older than you, unless it’s to call her a milf. she’s partial to that, no matter how much she pretends not to.

Shauna tries to give you advice that you barely listen to because her life is a train wreck. Let's be honest, she pulled Jackie by accident. Who else was going to match her freak?

Jackie’s embarrassedly knowledgeable about slang for her age. you’re not sure what's worse: Shauna purposely using it wrong to embarrass you, or Jackie using it correctly at her advanced age.

Every gift you’ve ever received from the two of them has been one that Jackie bought and put Shauna’s name down on. It’s not to say that Shauna can’t get thoughtful gifts, but if it’s from the both of them, it’s really just from Jackie. Jackie thinks you don’t notice, but she always overexaggerates Shauna’s bad handwriting when signing the card. it goes from being slightly unreadable to looking like a five-year-old wrote it.

Jackie tries too hard with your friends and always comes off as the like “cool mom” type. she’s out here offering snacks. shauna’s making it awkward by asking one with a Nirvana shirt to name five songs.