rustinged · 2 years ago
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thinking about that post “it’s not intelligent vs unintelligent. it’s curious vs refusal to be curious” thinking about how there’s no harm in saying you didn’t understand a movie you watched, without knocking it for its country of origin and/or the year it was made. for most movies, there’s analysis out there. there are essays upon essays about all types of films out there but refusal to be curious because the fear of looking stupid and the excuse of “movies are meant to be escapism” has clouded your mind
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cetoddle · 6 days ago
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okay. i am going to continue being stupid. and lowkey embarrassing. and a big stupid fucking idiot. i don’t know what’s wrong w me just ignore me forever okay? okay <3
#why why why why why why why why#i don’t even know what to say anymore my brain is going one thousand miles per hour and it’s all STUPID !!!!#why am i lowkey 24 years old a grown ass adult with literally the stupidest circumstantial crush rn#i don’t even wanna admit that’s what it is cause like. girl. why am i the worlds biggest idiot#i want to bash my head into a wall i don’t even know his name! i never spoke to the man! i know nothing! about him!!#im usually rlly good about not letting myself get all worked up over ppl i find attractive#but for some reason this feels out of my control. i’m trying to just like. get over it. but my brain just won’t stop being so FUCKING#stupid and it’s SO embarrassing!!#what i’m about to say is especially embarrassing to admit but like. idk what to do idk why this happening#i keep catching myself like. daydreaming abt what it would be like 2 hold his hand or give him a hug#i just wanna wrap my arms around his neck and feel his hands on my waist and i dont!! know where this is coming from!!!!!!!!#i wish i could spray my brain with a water bottle every time this happens because frankly this is just getting ridiculous#we are not gonna marry the man! we never spoke to him! we’re never going to see him again for the rest of our lives okay!!#get it together dumbass. so we saw a beautiful boy at a wedding reception and became enamored with his mannerisms so what who cares#it doesn’t matter u know! so what if it was attractive how he sat with his leg propped up while he looked at his camera#or how u caught him buttoning and unbuttoning his little jacket over and over. or the way he leaned against the wall to watch the crowd#or his stupid dumb cute lil smile or how the few times you accidentally made eye contact w him ur heart went all pap pap and shit#it was just a fleeting moment! who gives a shit!! get over it!!#god. it’s especially embarrassing cause i’m here obsessed w the man still desperately wishing i could talk to him and idk learn everything#about him. and i know damn well to him i was just some creepy girl who wouldn’t stop staring at him. he probably thinks im like. plotting#his death or something. i’m not. but i should probably plot my own if i don’t get over this soon#idk idk idk i literally don’t know why this is happening!#we’ve seen hot ppl before why is this different! god!!!!!!!#i haven’t felt this way abt someone in such a long time#and it’s just frustrating knowing just how stupid i am sitting here like this#cause i know he doesn’t care. he doesn’t know me. and that’s fine! idk why my brain is doing this!#whats wrong w me genuinely. i can’t control what’s happening is so fucking weird#i truly feel like im going insane i can’t make sense of why this is happening to me#stupid stupid stupid stupid SO embarrassing idk idk#snow.txt
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terastalungrad · 5 days ago
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Today I visited the National Justice Museum in Nottingham, with a group of friends.
I find myself reflecting on the difference between museums and the internet.
Because the internet promises endless riches - so much history and information. What are the advantages of museums? Buildings with a relatively tiny amount of information, that require clothes and travel and negotiation with other people.
Well.
The highlight of the visit was a pair of performances. First, we watched an actor play the part of an executioner. He talked us through the history of hanging, and then introduced us to a woman sentenced to death - a second performer. Plenty of history to be learned - but also a lot of fun to be had from the interaction between the performers and the audience. Little semi-scripted moments, with the performers clearly enjoying the process of selecting audience members for the various jokes along the way. On top of this, the crowd was encouraged to boo and jeer the condemned woman.
The other performance was even more interactive. A reenactment of a trial, specific visitors were selected to play specific characters in the scene, alongside three actors (who'd all played roles in the execution scene as well). The audience roles were reasonably foolproof - but with plenty of scope to shine for those who wanted to throw themselves into the experience.
And this is the thrill of a museum. It's the fact that you're there with other people. The presence of others enhances the experience. The performances were made so much better by the strangers who happened to visit the museum on the same day we did.
And that's true even when it's less obvious. Queuing at the cafe - walking around the exhibits - shopping at the gift shop. Humans are social by nature.
And I wonder. When we watch a YouTube video, is this why we're so keen to read the comments? Is it why, when I watch a new TV show, I'm desperate to talk to other people about it?
The internet lets us curate our lived experience to perfect precision. We needn't be bothered by anyone else getting in the way with their inconvenient humanity.
Museums recognise that humanity's the whole point.
Trials and executions. We love courtroom dramas. Public executions used to attract crowds of thousands. I think we find this ghoulish. But deep down, I think it's that we all crave shared experiences.
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ciderjacks · 5 months ago
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ok I mentioned this earlier and people were sort of confused but I’m gonna try to explain why I think the long AND short lifespan issues were resolved by the end of dungeon meshi. WARNING: DUNMESHI SPOILERS AHEAD
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Part 1: the lifespans aren’t natural
ok so I’m gonna start with that no I don’t think Marcille got her wish, at least not the way she wanted. Marcille wanted to bend the rules of nature so everyone would live an unnaturally long time. However, the lifespans that the races in dungeon meshi have (besides tall-men, but I’ll get to that later) are also not natural. They only had those lifespans because the winged lion was maintaining that lifespan for their race.
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You can see at least 3 different races here that are asking for different life spans, what they’re asking for lines up with what the lifespans are.
the dwarf asked for immortality, the elf asked specifically for a thousand year life, the half foot heard this and said that was too long, and to make it shorter. The only ones who didn’t ask for a lifespan alteration were the (would be) tall-men. The lifespans aren’t natural, they’re caused by the demons magic…
part 2: so what of the demons magic?
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This is I think the most explicit statement, that the demons magic, every wish the demon granted, is lost. This includes lifespans, one of the oldest wishes it granted. And I wanna highlight one thing she says specifically. “We have the luxury of time”. I don’t think that means a long life, I think it means the opposite. The narrative regards these lifespans as unnatural, destructive and soul sucking. The immortal townspeople are cursed, time doesn’t matter to them, and so they have no desires, or drive to continue. This is depicted by them finding food flavourless.
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and when they no longer have immortality look at how they think of food. That is the luxury of time, not to avoid it, but to experience it. This is what the “long-lived” races must learn in the absence of the demon, now lacking the extra hundreds of years the demon had gifted them. That’s why it’s important that Marcille didn’t get her wish the way she wanted, because she wanted everyone to live forever. And speaking of Marcille’s wish.
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She says she’s learned to embrace death, and not because of anything the demon did. She wanted to live forever with her friends, she didn’t want to confront death. With the demons magic gone, she no longer has the extra thousand years. She’s learning to accept her friends mortality, yes, but she’s also learning to accept her own.
part 3: the theme of accepting death
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Like I said earlier, Marcille is afraid of death. So is Delgal/Yaad. The end of the story resolves their acceptance around death and dying. As much as Marcille wanted everyone else to live, there’s a reason she decided everyone should just live a thousand years. She doesn’t want to sacrifice her own lifespan, she wants infinite time with the people she loves. In the aftermath of the winged lion, she instead gets a much shorter amount of time. Delgal/Yaad is similar, in that he feared death. He says he was afraid of dying and losing everything, but now he’s ok with that reality, because the reality of an extended or eternal life was much worse.
part 4: the curse of living and the curse of living too long
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To desire is to eat is to live. Our most primal instincts. The long lived races, while not immortal and desire-less, had an unnatural amount of time on their hands. They were able to forego their humanity because they’d been gifted all the time they wanted, which lead to fighting and oppression of the short lived races (which is why it’s important for Laios to be the king, even though the elves and dwarves have lost the demons magic. Their mindset at that point in time, is of people with too much time on their hands.)
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When Falin speaks to the demon, stripped of all his desire, he describes living as cruel. From his perspective, humans have a limited time and a constant desire, sorrow and anxiety pressing at them. Yet, Falin says it’s delicious. The fear inherent to living is natural, it’s what makes life interesting, and so it’s thematically important that the magic allowing certain races to avoid this reality isn’t maintained. Marcille’s wish was based in truth, it was how she went about it that was wrong.
Part 5: the end of the racial power dynamic
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Obviously the races and cultures are still different, they were different before the winged lion began granting wishes, and will remain different, however what the narrative tells us again and again is that the lifespans are equivalent to a power structure. Elves and dwarves are at the top, because they were granted long lives. This power structure is explicitly not natural, it’s not how the races should be, Ryoko Kui emphasizes this several times. So given this, I think it’s really important that at the end, when the demons magic is gone, all the races become one unit. There is no more power structure, is what this implies. One of humanities oldest desires, the desire to live eternally, is undone.
Ryoko Kui wanted to show that the racism and the power structures weren’t logical, and they weren’t natural, and now the people will have to navigate without those, without differences of lifespan, and without the ability to push away death.
part 6: conclusion
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“Surely your kind exists for no reason but to starve” = “you exist for no reason but to die”
as Laios literally consumes life force itself, destroying the demon and destroying its magic. After he does this, the races are portrayed as one unit. The elves say that while magic isn’t gone, the demon’s and what came with it is, and that things will be different from thereon-out.
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magic will continue to exist, but its been effectively reset, or unraveled, by the death of the demon.
the ability to live hundreds of years is lost, and while the winged lion, an eternal creature, thinks of this as a curse, to humans it’s a secret blessing. The impact of time is what keeps us going.
The structures set up by the ancient lifespan wishes are also undone. No race should get to live longer than any other, humans shouldn’t have unnatural structures like that. It disrupts the natural flow of living. Thats the resolution to the lifespan issue. Not “Marcille has to accept that she’s going to live an unnaturally long life”, but “Marcille has to accept that no one should have that much time, including her”. That’s why I think the lifespan issue is resolved when the demon dies. Thanks for reading, if you managed to read all of this.
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legalkimchi · 6 months ago
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Please learn more than just a Phrase.
I don't expect people to be subject matter experts on issues of global politics.
But false equivalency is rampant in online discourse regarding three major conflicts in the world today. I am using the word conflict in this post, however, when applicable, i will use other words to describe specifics. (Nuance folks... it's a thing)
So i start off with an assumption that most people don't understand the basics of most international events. As an american, i only know some of the stuff that is happening within my own nation. This is not an insult to you, dear reader. Rather, it is a position we all must realize we are in. You do not understand most world issues.
You just don't.
you aren't there. it isn't your life. you don't have the academic background.
I saw a post recently calling for "freedom for Palestine, Sudan, and Congo."
And it bothered me. Not because i am opposed to peace, (how is asking for ceasefire a bad thing?) but rather because i believe simplifying the conflicts with this wording showcases the ignorance of the differences.
Not all conflicts are the same.
In palestine, we have a convoluted mess where two groups claim a territory as home. getting into the in-depth story of this conflict takes time. Foundational elements of it take place thousands of years ago, but the conflict itself is only about 75 years old. So it is a long and short story. Currently, the sovereign state of Israel is engaging in a genocide in Gaza. Asking for freedom for palestinians makes sense. they live in an apartheid state and would like a state of their own. they wish to be free of occupation. you can argue with the details, be pro-israel, or whatever, but that is the basic ask of palestinians. (if you want to get into anti-semetic regional sentiment or the desire of certain groups to eradicate the israeli jewish population or Israel as a nation that's a different topic, not the point of what i'm talking about.)
In the Congo and Sudan, it is a different story.
Let's start with the Congo. First of all, Which Congo?
Let's please understand that there is the Republic of the Congo and the Democratic Republic of the Congo. The Republic of the Congo is a former french colony. Then there is Democratic Republic of the Congo. Some of us might remember this country as Zaire.
the DRC is the congo we are talking about in the news. This was a former belgian colony and the atrocities committed by the belgians there rival any genocide in human history. i've seen estimates between 5 million and 20 million deaths. some estimates state the population of native congolese were cut in HALF. since the turbulent start of the country after their independence in 1960, the country knew relative peace until the 1990s. Then a mixture of a weak central government and the Rwandan Civil war (which had it's own genocide you may have heard about) spilled over into what was then Zaire. Zaire dissolved, and the DRC took it's place, But the wars have been raging off an on since then. earlier this year, more civil war violence erupted AGAIN. This displaced millions, AGAIN. while the DRC is a bit of an autocratic and repressive regime, the rebel groups are groups with ties with the Rwandan government and the other group with ties to Isis. It's awful all the way down.
Sudan has had an ongoing civil war for over 20 years. I remember this because i helped lead some anti-genocide protests regarding Darfur when i was in college 20 years ago. I've been following this conflict for nearly my entire adult life. you may have heard about this with regards to the Save Darfur coalition regarding the genocide in Darfur. Well, that genocide has continued (albeit with less intensity) for 20 years. the civil war lasted until 2021, but restarted in a different form in late 2023. the conflict is now between two different sides of the military government fighting each other.
It is an awful conflict full of awful leaders. Sudan's government suffered a revolution in 2019 from a dictator, only to have that government overthrown in a coup by the current dictator. The Sudanese military is supported by folks like Russia and North Korea. you might see that among the other countries that support sudan, bunch of communist countries, and you might think "hey, maybe al-Burhan is a leftist".
no... no he is not.
He is a military despot. He has no ties to any real ideology. He just runs sudan as a military dictator.
So who is opposing him?
The Rapid Support Forces. and you may be thinking "ok, so they are the good guys? trying to overthrow the dictator?"
No... They are the ones that instigated the Genocide in Darfur.
This is a situation is "no matter who wins, the people of Sudan lose."
So when folks claim these are all the same. Or wonder why folks talk about one and not the other.
there are reasons. These are very different conflicts. Please learn about them. It matters more than spouting some 4 word slogan calling for "freedom."
Find out what the people of these areas actually need. Learn more about what is happening. My description above is incomplete. I may even get some things wrong. I am trying to keep informed, but I am not an expert, nor do i live there. Raise voices from the region and find out if there are ways to help.
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linkspooky · 24 days ago
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If there's a next time, maybe I'll change how I live...
Sukuna's last moment in the manga ends with him accepting that his loss, and showing even the strongest of all time Sukuna, someone powerful enough to do what he wants, when he wants, could not only lose but he could be wrong. This is something considering that you could make an argument that the entire manga, and sorcerer society as a whole is shaped around Sukuna's morality of the pursuit of selfish desire and strength of all else. In fact someone else argues it right here.
What led to this journey of the most irredeemable character in the comics who lived only for selfish pleasure acknowledging the love he rejected in the end? Well, we'll cover that under the cut.
The Cycle
Before analyzing Shinjuku as a whole, I want to start with its conclusion. I'll first break down the final moment in Sukuna's character arc, and then go back to the start and analyze how we got there. That being said, let's get on with it.
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Sukuna loss begins with him contradicting his own nature. I'll explain what I mean by this. If you read the thread above, detective_critics observes characters like Sukuna who live for themselves and characters who embody Sukuna's ideals like Gojo are rewarded in the manga whereas characters like Yuji who fight primarily for others are punished relentlessly.
This is well supported by Yuji's continual losses throughout the manga. Yuji swallows Sukuna's fingers in order to permanently execute Sukuna and stop future people from being harmed by curses, but because of Yuji's decision to swallow the finger thousands die in Shibuya. Yuji's desire to save others only seems to backfire and he's continually presented with those he can't save, Junpei, Nanami, Nobara. He's even robbed of his own purpose of being Sukuna's vessel when Sukuna takes Megumi's body instead.
I mostly agree with this idea that the manga rewards people more true to their desires like Sukuna and Gojo, but I'd like to add an addendum that the manga doesn't specifically reward selfishness, but rather self-actualization.
To backtrack slightly, Sukuna observes that many sorcerers in the past have faced him but they didn't truly believe in their ideals the way that Yuji did. Yuji is punished by the narrative yes, but he's not unceremoniously killed off the way that Toji, and Mahito are. Rather, Yuji's durability, his ability to cling to life instead of just dying off like Sukuna suggests weak people should do comes from the fact that his ideal is unshakable.
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Let's look at Sukuna's words a little more closely. He says that many sorcerers killed him in the past and they all had different ideals, but none of them truly believed in their ideals. Because Sukuna could so easily point out how their idealism was false he came to think of all ideals as worthless. This is shown in the way that he easily picks apart both Gojo and Hajime, two characters who lose because they ultimately don't believe in their own ideals. Sukuna is very easily able to point out the hypocrisy in both of them.
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Sukuna basically points out that Kashimo and Gojo were both happy to bully anyone who came near them, they'll throw around their power all they like and revel in their own superiority and then go back and complain about being lonely. A classic case of wanting to have your cake and eat it too, or as Sukuna said they were being greedy. They were the ones who rejected everyone around them, they were the ones who rejected the love they were shown, and yet they put the blame on everyone else.
Gojo even in death acts like everyone else is a flower, an inferior being incapable of understanding him. Yet, a few panels later he says that the fight with Sukuna the only person who rivaled him in strength and therefore shouldn't be able to understand him didn't satisfy him, and he would only have been satisfied if Geto were there.
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These two statements contradict each other. The thing is, Gojo has at this point long surpassed Geto in strength. People often clown Geto on the fact that he never had a domain expansion, and that Kenjaku seemed to use his cursed technique far better than he ever could. Geto is someone who's far behind Gojo in strength, and yet he's the one who could satisfiy Gojo, not Sukuna. Which means Gojo was the one who was wrong. Gojo was betraying his ideals. He believed he was living to be the strongest, that he was satisfied being the strongest while all along wanting something else and it's that contradiction that killed him.
Let me make a brief comparison to another manga. Aizen from Bleach is a character with a god complex to rival Gojo's, and just like Gojo exists on a different level of power than everyone else. He is not only the strongest soul reaper, but one of the smartest, and has been isolated by that strength since he was a child. Aizen then believes that he needs to become god, because it's his right as a naturally superior being, but Aizen is a fraud.
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Aizen loses becuase the hogyoku the source of his power rejected him right as he seemed to be at the peak of his power. However, Ichigo reflects that maybe the Hogyoku didn't reject him. The Hogyoku is in plot, a wish granting macguffin, that grants your subconscious desire. Ichigo speculates that maybe Aizen didn't truly want to ascend to godhood, but rather he wanted someone like Ichigo to defeat him. That he wanted an equal like Ichigo so he wouldn't have to be alone on the top anymore. Aizen not being fully aware of this desire and clinging to his sense of superiority instead, the very thing that makes him lonely is what causes him to lose. Aizen is cut down by Ichigo, and instead of becoming a god he becomes just another soul reaper.
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Sukuna cuts through Gojo by cutting through the world, bypassing the infinity, and therefore making him just like everyone else. Just as Aizen wished to be just another soul reaper, Gojo becomes just another sorcerer now that his position of the strongest has been taken by Sukuna.
So Gojo's loss came when he betrayed his ideals. His stated ideal of "I am the strongest", but this was contradicted by what he really wanted which was the time of his life when him and Geto together said "We are the Strongest." Strength didn't satisfy him, but rather it was Geto and Gojo's inability to realize the real reason he was fighting leads to his loss.
The manga doesn't reward selfishness, but rather self-actualization. Characters with a strong sense of self are just more likely to be self-actualized, because they possess a deep sense of self awareness.
Sukuna at least is self-aware. He knows you can't be the strongest, to relentlessly bully others with your power and yet want to be close to other people too. He knows that's wanting to have your cake and eat it too, so he rejects love. Sukuna knows you can't have it both ways, so he decides I don't need love, love won't satisfy me, I'll live only to be the strongest.
My main example of a character betraying their ideals is Toji though.
Toji moves to face a newly awakened Gojo. He has not only a solid plan to fight him, curse tools that can penetrate his infinity, but he's also got inside knowledge of the Limitless. Toji believes he can win, and yet at the same time he feels uneasy.
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As he died, Toji reflects that the reason he died is because he deviated from his true self. He believed that he was jumping from job to job, just working for money. That he didn't care about the sorcerer world. He killed sorcerers, got paid, and then gambled it all away.
Yet, when he was faced with the pinnacle of Jujutsu his motivation changed from living to fulfill his own selfish desires, to revenge. Toji wasn't as over the way the Zen'in Clan rejected him as he thought he was. He needed to defeat Gojo in order to affirm himself, and the moment he betrayed his own ideals like that he lost.
Now this moment can be directly paralleled back to Sukuna, who feels a similiar unease the entire time that he's fighting Yuji, an unease that makes him more and more irrational over the course of the fight.
Sukuna betrays his ideals in two ways, one that he's never once cared what other sorcerers think and say and lives only for himself and two that he is merely killing time before he dies. The first leads to his breakdown over the fight as he tries to crush Yuji, but finds himself unable to. The second is as I said above the final nail in the coffin.
When faced with a stronger opponent, or rather opponents as the sorcerers of the modern era all work together to trump the sorcerer of the golden age of sorcerery Sukuna doesn't accept his death. In his last moments he's clinging desperately to Megumi, trying to keep living in his body. At which point Megumi remarks that even someone like Sukuna must fear death too.
You could connect this to Mahito too. Many people even said that Sukuna got the Mahito treatment. Both characters lived freely slaughtering everyone else, and yet when they are about to be killed they try and run away from it. This is obviously deliberate as not only do the words "You are Me' parallel "I am you" but Sukuna's last moment in the manga is a conversation with Mahito.
Mahito also betrayed his ideal. Number one curses don't truly die, Jogo and Hanami and Dagan all accept their deaths because they'll be reborn as different curses but they'll always come back. However, Mahito clings to his own existence. Mahito is also not true to his nature, because he longs to be a true curse, but Mahito is also the most human curse. He's the representative of the fear and hate humans have for one another, and he spends his last moments terrified of the human being known as Yuji Itadori.
Which is why Mahito is appropriate to have this final conversation with Sukuna. Mahito calls out the way Sukuna betrayed his ideals. Sukuna always believed he was only living to satisfy himself and he didn't care what others thought, but Mahito points out that he was really living for revenge towards the people who rejected that unlovable wretch. Sukuna wasn't rejecting people because he was a god towering far above others, but because he had been rejected and hated in the past and then decided to hate them in turn.
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However, unlike Mahito Sukuna is able to grow up so to speak. Mahito doesn't want to be anything else but Sukuna comes to the realization that you can choose your nature. That the decision to hate and reject everyone was a choice, and that he can choose a different path in another life.
You define who you are, that is the literal definition of self actualization. So we see Sukuna having become enlightened about himself escape the cycle, whereas Mahito who's still a curse is still trapped in that cycle. Something that Mahito complains about, that he's just a child unable to grow up while even Sukuna has changed.
Escaping the Cycle
Now that I've shown you how Sukuna has changed, I'm going to go over all of Shinjuku to describe the events that led to this change. This change is brought about everyone, but most of all by Yuji Itadori someone who unlike Sukuna reached self-realization. Yuji is the one who remains true to himself, whereas Sukuna who has only lived for himself is the one who betrays himsellf in the end.
The first hint that Sukuna may not entirely believe his own words comes in his conversation with Kashimo. Sukuna lives for his own self-satisfaction, other people exist for him to amuse himself until he dies. Since he's a complete being who doesn't need anyone else to satisfy him, since he's satisfied then why did he need to divide himself into twenty parts and keep living after death.
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Sukuna doesn't answer this quesiton, but rather just continues on with his monologue. If life to Sukuna is just killing time until he dies then why does he go above and beyond to prolong his life? Why not accept his natural death?
Then after quickly dispatching Higuruma, Sukuna finds himself unsatisfied. Even though he was doing exactly what Kashimo told him, he was tasting an interesting sorcerer and swallowing him whole.
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Sukuna doesn't feel satisfied in his victory. At first he thinks it's just because Higuruma lost too early, and then he realizes that his current disatisfaction comes from Yuji. Sukuna doesn't care what others think, he hates the concept of ideals themselves, at yet the same time Yuji holding an unbreakable ideal bothers him. If Sukuna is being true to himself, then he shouldn't care what Yuji believes in.
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Yet, Sukuna changes for the first time in a thousand years. He acquires a new ideal and that's killing every sorcerer present and then initating the merger. Something that Kusakabe even notes is out of character for Sukuna. He thought Sukuna wouldn't have a need to start the merger, he doesn't care about big picture things like Kenjaku he just wants to strong opponent.
Sukuna begins to drift further and further from his nature because of Yuji over the course of the fight. As I said Sukuna shouldn't have to fight Yuji to prove that Yuji's ideal is wrong. If he rejects all ideologies then he shouldn't even care. Yet the things that set Sukuna off the most in the fight, the things that motivate him to fight the hardest to crush his enemy are people like Yuji and Maki who challenge his beliefs. Yuji by fighting for others instead of himself, and Maki by rejecting cursed energy entirely and instead having a strong body to fight.
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Sukuna who is supposed to be completely satisfied with himself, has something to prove when fighting against these opponents. We learn that Yuji isn't just some boring child like Sukuna suggested. He's actually made from the other half of Sukuna's soul. Rather, Sukuna rejected his twin and ate him in the womb. All of his superiority as a sorcerer, his four arms, the mouth on his stomach comes from this. However, that twin didn't disappear, he reincarnated and mated with Kenjaku to produce Yuji.
So Sukuna is Yuji's uncle technically, but symbolically, Yuji is the other half of his soul. The half that Sukuna rejected. How can Sukuna be someone at peace with all of himself, if he rejects half of himself? It goes along with what Mahito said, Sukuna didn't reject others because he was compeltely satisfied with living alone, but because of revenge. He was born a malformed retch and never shown love so he rejected all forms of love.
Sukuna is not at ease with himself because he's not whole. Yuji represents the love that Sukuna rejectected. Rejecting yourself doesn't work though, because one he tried to reject his twin and his twin's soul reincarnted, and two rejecting yourself is completely at odds with the complete self-acceptance that Sukuna preaches is the source of his strength.
Sukuna's incessant need to reject Yuji, to prove that Yuji is wrong, that he's inferior is what leads to his demise. Not only that, but Sukuna's rejection of Yuji's method of fighting, relying on his allies leaves him blind to several elements of Yuta's strategy. He falls for the copy technique bluff twice, because Sukuna didn't factor that both the original users Angel and Toge could still use their techniques too. He's beaten by the cooperation that Yuta uses in his strategy, because Sukuna rejects that same kind of cooperation and sees it as a weakness.
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Sukuna's proven to be wrong. He told Jogo that working with others limits your individual strength and he should have tried fighting on his own, but Sukuna is continually outfoxed by Yuta's strategy which relies entirely on team coordination.
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It's also a direct parallel to the way that Gojo lost in Shibuya. Gojo was absolutely infuriated that the curses would work together to fight him and they'd rely on a strategy instead of just overpowering him with brute strength. But Gojo lost, precisely because they made a strategy around Gojo's exact weakness, that he's strongest when he's alone.
If Sukuna didn't feel the need to reject the others, then he wouldn't be so blind to Yuta's way of fighting with strategy and cooperation. If he could accept other ways of thinking other than his own he wouldn't have been hoodwinked multiple times in the fight. Yet, it isn't just Sukuna rejecting them on principle, he has to reject companionship otherwise the curses and hatred churning inside of him would burn him up inside. So Sukuna isn't really choosing his nature as he believes, but rather he's a slave to it.
There's also parts where Sukuna just straight up lies. He says he feels nothing, and yet two panels later he's completely enraged.
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You could say that Sukuna is just saying he feels nothing about Yuji's attempts to empathize with him, but that's not the case. He definitely feels something, because that empathy, or rather pity as Sukuna frames it compeltely infuriates him.
if Sukuna lived entirely according to his own desires and didn't care about the opinions of others, as he stated a hundred times above why does Yuji's pity infuriate him? If he was so confident in his godlike superiority to others, why does he feel the need to prove it, by ripping apart all of Yuji's friends right in front of it in a gesture of revenge for being pitied.
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This leads to what is the greatest moment of growth for Yuji, and the greatest moment of stagnation for Sukuna. Yuji's moment of growth isn't just in rejecting the cog mentality, but also in accepting Megumi. Specifically, he accepts the fact that Megumi is different than him, that it's alright if Megumi's not strong enough to keep living.
Sukuna is compelled by his own nature, his desire for revenge to reject everything around him, but the conclusion of Yuji's character arc is defined by acceptance. Not only does he accept that Megumi's own feelings are different than his, but he's willing to accept Sukuna back into his soul.
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I don't think Yuji empathizes with Sukuna. He still doesn't understand him. However, in spite of that lack of understanding, he's willing to accept Sukuna into his soul and keep living with him, because as I said above Yuji and Sukuna are two halves of the same soul. Sukuna is the embodiment of everything he hates, someone who carelessly disregards life and hurts others with a thought, and yet Yuji is willing to give a second chance to that person.
In that moment Yuji lives true to his ideal of saving people, whereas by clinging to life Sukuna was betraying his ideal. I think it's important that Yuji didn't empathize with Sukuna though because Yuji and Sukuna might be two halves but they're meant to represent opposites.
Sukuna also had to learn to accept that Yuji was different than him. He spent the entire story trying to reject him and step on him like a bug. If Sukuna were truly confident in his ideals he wouldn't care that other people had different thoughts, but no Yuji had to be wrong.
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Yuji doesn't empathize with Sukuna but he does change him. He alters Sukuna's fundamental nature "You are me" by showing Sukuna there was a different path he could have taken all along. That Sukuna wasn't the strongest he could be, that someone could have compeltely different ideals and be stronger.
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Uraume says that the main characters didn't win because they were stronger, but because Sukuna was in Megumi's body a thousand years later instead of his own original body. Which basically means that Sukuna being a parasite in the modern era, pointlessly extending his life is exactly what led to his defeat because he couldn't accept his own death.
I think it's significant that it's not Yorozu or Yuji who Sukuna finally decides to accept as someone he can love, but Uraume. Sukuna even references there were people who tried to teach him about love in life. Assuming the one on the right in Yorozu, the way both uraume and Yorozu approach their relationship with Sukuna is compelte opposites.
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Yorozu in the end seemed to recognize Sukuna's isolation, but she projected her desires onto him entirely like everyone else in the manga. Yorozu, Gojo, Kashimo, they don't seek to understand Sukuna but rather to make him understand then. They're in the end kind of self-serving in their love, making Sukuna into a symbol. Specifically Gojo and Kashimo project their loneliness onto Sukuna when Sukuna never asked for it. I mean if you want an example Gojo says this in his dying dream.
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Yet, moments later Sukuna declares that Gojo Satoru cleared his skies. That he would never forget his name. Sukuna was completely satisfied with the fight, Gojo just didn't understand him.
Ironically, the one who Sukuna finally shows love to is the one who never bothered to try teaching love to Sukuna in the first place. Ura Ume spends the entire time at Sukuna's side, and while they seem to have more of a servant master relationship I'd argue that Ura Ume has a better read on Sukuna than anyone else. They can tell when Sukuna is enjoying himself, they can tell when Sukuna is holding back, they don't ever try to make Sukuna into something he's not they just stay by his side and accept them.
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Sukuna's final scene in the manga is a deliberate callback to this scene. Jogo begins to cry and Sukuna says he doesn't undertand the reason why Jogo is crying. Immediately afterwards, UraUme appears in front of him.
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Then, in their final scene together Sukuna is shown musing on how two people showed him there were different ways of living, Uraume and Yorozu. As he decides to go north, and become someone new as Mei Mei once put it in the going north and going south metaphor, he holds Ura Ume's hand and comforts him as he cries.
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There are two people in the manga who showed Sukuna unconditional acceptance, Yuji and Uraume. Through them Sukuna was finally able to accept his own humanity.
So in conclusion: Sukume canon!
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rosenotactuallyquartz · 5 months ago
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i just got involved with the fandom on social media, and i’m surprised that the pearlrose “unrequited” misconception is still a thing, after all these years. i’m also surprised by how hated they are. as a ship, individually, etc.
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even if sugar + burnett didn’t state that pearlrose was requited, i would know from the behavior of their friends.
in the movie, amethyst referred to rose as the “love of pearl’s life.” sapphire told pearl that she “swept rose off her feet.” pearl + rose lived together for centuries, but they also lived with garnet + amethyst. if the love was unrequited, they would have behaved very differently.
pearl herself would have behaved differently, too. she’s incredibly intelligent. many girls crush on her and she’s survived a lot, even prior to rose’s death. i could never picture a situation in which pearl lives with someone she is so clearly in love with for so many years, while that someone doesn’t feel the same way. pearl survived a war, escaped from homeworld, then raised a child & fixed the issues between her & greg during the early stages of grief. she loved and protected someone for thousands of years, and then lost her. if it was unrequited over 5,000 years ago, pearl wouldn’t be saying rose made her feel like she was “everything” and pearl probably would have taken space. rose would encourage this, because pearl’s happiness was always important to her.
their requited love and deep emotional connection that they had with no one else is evident, even without all the clear evidence in the episodes. rose wouldn’t blush and exclaim, “please don’t ever stop” as a response to pearl’s love confession if she didn’t feel the same way. she would simply say, “yes, you should imagine things on your own, but…” and they absolutely would not have nearly fused.
the flashbacks with greg are confusing and there’s information about pearlrose left out *because* this is a story told by greg to his child. of course there are missing perspectives and details left out. and also, there are thousands of years between the war flashbacks and the greg flashbacks. pearl and rose spent centuries together and we only see about ten years in total. the creators confirmation that pearlrose is requited *can* make sense.
every steven universe relationship is complicated with undesirable aspects. pearl and rose were two very traumatized individuals who went through so much together. yet they don’t seem to get much sympathy, from what i’ve seen on some platforms. one or both characters are often viewed as “toxic,” and their relationship being nonexistent and unrequited makes less sense than the opposite. are there some unhealthy aspects? of course! but i also think the unhealthy aspects of so many other relationships in the show are overlooked. just like how the beautiful parts of pearlrose are ignored. the *love* between pearlrose is ignored.
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imaginesmai · 1 year ago
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Something new - Azriel
Another kinktober fic! I've seen this trope SO MUCH lately, I couldn't help myself.
Plot: Azriel proposes something new, and even if you have doubts, you're all in.
Warnings: just porn , facesitting, shadowplay.
Azriel is looking at you with a raised brow, a smug smile on his face. He’s silently daring you to bring up another argument, only so he can dismantle it as easily as the rest of them.
It’s hard enough to deny his petition. Not only it’s unusual for him to ask anything, to be comfortable enough around you to talk about sexual fantasies and desires. It is hard because he is completely naked. You can spend hours staring at his sculped chest, muscles hard and wide, covered in tattoos.
And you don’t even want to drag your eyes lower, where his cock is standing tall, demanding your attention.
Usually, you would be more than happy to give it all the attention you have. But Azriel has stopped you moments ago and proposed something different. Something you have never tried, although it has crossed your mind sometimes. Multiple times, actually.
“I will be fine” he assures you for the sixth time that evening. “I promise, darling. I’m a trained warrior, I push my body each day to the limit in the ring with Cassian. If I can take down Illyrian warriors, I can hold your weight”
“Or not” you rebate. “You can’t compare sparing to Cassian to me sitting on your face”
“Certainly not, I’m sure it will be far more pleasant”
Sex with Azriel is never monotonous, he makes sure of it. Even if the shadowsinger is an introvert and quiet on the outside, inside the bedroom he shows you a different part of him. You are used to playing games, some of them involving his shadows, ropes, and even wax.
You have enjoyed each and every of them, and you know you will enjoy what he is proposing even more. But still, you are doubtful about it.
“I could hurt you without meaning to. And what if you can’t breathe? How am I supposed to notice?” you repeat the questions, and he just blinks unamused. “We don’t know if it’s safe. Maybe someone has died and no one has reported it. Death by asphyxiation, under mysterious circumstances. Maybe their partner was shoving their – “
“What better way to die than between your legs?” Azriel cuts you off with a deep, loud chuckle. Tired of the banter, he grabs your hand and pushes you forward. “My shadows will make sure I live to do this again, don’t worry. Now let me have my dessert”
Any other time, you hope, you would have been more hesitant. But you have been both naked for a long time now, lazily making out and grinding against each other in bed. There are purple spots all over your neck and chest, where Azriel has been buried minutes ago. And your nails are printed all over his back and ass.
Before you can act on your newest fantasy, Azriel brings you close. He presses his lips against yours, as he has done already a thousand times that night.
They are swollen and soft, his hand holding the back of your head to keep you close. It brushes gently your hair, easing your worries away. His tongue traces the edge of yours, as if he hasn’t almost shoved it down your throat an hour ago.
Azriel eases the both of you until you are laying on his chest, wings sprawled under him. All it takes is for your sneaky fingers tracing the membrane of his left one for him to break the kiss.
His left hand gives you a playful smack on your ass and pushes you forward.
“Come on, Y/N” he growls, his shadows pushing you forward too.
“Let me know if it becomes too much” you remind him as you get to your knees.
“Sure”
“And if I’m too heavy, please don’t die” you place your hands on the headboard.
“I won’t die, I promise”
“If you feel like you can’t breathe, you touch my – “
“Get here”
You are still hesitant, hovering over his face with your knees at either side of his head. But Azriel, who has quite patient, doesn’t let you finish. He grips the top of your thighs and pulls down, his shadows fixing your hands on the headboard so you can’t pull yourself up.
And damn.
Any coherent thought leaves your head as he licks a long strip through your soaked folds, parting them without any care. You suck a breath when he reaches your opening and doesn’t stop for a second before digging in.
His shadows are the only thing cold on your body as you almost melt against his face, not caring anymore about asphyxiation or crushing him. Azriel is griping you so hard that there will be purple fingerprints on your legs the next day. And if the shadows holding you in place and his mouth devouring you isn’t enough, one of his hands gropes a handful of your ass and pulls you closer to him.
“You’re so sweet” Azriel mumbles from under you, his teeth grazing your clip and taking a deep moan out of you. “Coul be here all day”
“Az”
“My sweet pussy”
He isn’t possessive, at least not when you are public. Behind closed doors, he owns your body and soul. Your grip on the headboard almost flatters when he sucks hard on your clit, taking the small button between his lips, brushing his tongue underneath.
All you can smell is him, his arousal, and all you can hear is him lapping your juices. You don’t have to look back to know there’s a hand wrapped around his cock, a hand that isn’t his entirely. His shadows must have touched a sensitive spot, because his body is bucking up and you almost fall to the side, if it wasn’t for his hands holding you in place.
You try to get one hand free. Maybe to pull at his hair, to cover your mouth. Azriel doesn’t let you.
“Let me – I need a hand” you moan again when he starts leaving kisses from your clit to your opening, covering any reachable spot. “Azriel, let me go”
“No”
His voice resonates in your cunt and that is almost enough to bring you close to the edge. Only his presence would be enough, the presence of an Illyrian male that falls on his knees in front of you, that is completely yours.
Azriel knows your body and knows you’re close, so instead of letting go of any of your hands, he speeds up. All you feel are his teeth, his lips and his tongue on your pussy, on your folds, on your clit. He rounds the sensitive spot as the shadows rip a moan out of him, and the next second he has his tongue in you, his nose brushing your clit.
Like a madman who hasn’t eaten in days, he devours you whole. You are almost sure he has stopped breathing a while ago, but before you can make sure he’s fine, you’re cumming.
Without your hand to cover your mouth, anyone within hearing range hears you breaking down screaming his name as you cum on his face. He rides through your orgasm without even changing the pace, and black dots appear on your line of sight.
“Az, I can’t – Azriel, stop –“
He doesn’t, and before you know it, your tights are trapping his head between your legs and you’re having the best orgasm of your life. He continues licking any juice that leaves your body, alternating between eating you out and assaulting your clit.
The shadows let go when there’s nothing left in you to give, and Azriel has barely time to catch you as you fall to the side, completely spent.
He manages to pull you back to him, and when you open your eyes again, you’re met with his hazel ones looking down at you with only love and adoration. His lips and chin are shinning with your juices, and without breaking eye contact, he licks them clean.
It’s certainly enough to make you notice the shadows around his shaft.
“I’m alive” Azriel smirked. “Are you?”
“That was the best orgasm of my life”
Your confession drags an ego boost out of him, that you feel through the bond. You smile when his hand finds your cheek and caress it loving. If you asked, you are sure he would turn around and try to sleep with a painful boner. And if you asked, he would totally use his shadows to keep you up and go for a second round.
Before he can propose any of them, you prop up on your elbow and drag your nails down his chest.
They follow the pattern of his tattoos, and he watches you with a raised eyebrow. His expression quickly changes when your fingers find his nipple, your thumb flickering it gently.
“Return the favor?” you propose, with a knowing smile.
The next thing you know, Azriel’s lips are once more on you and his cock pressed against your stomach.
You’re in for a long night.
Want to read more? Check out my side blog @imaginesmaimasterlists, where I keep all the masterlists! Feedback is always appreciated
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graceshouldwrite · 1 year ago
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The Most Powerful Hack to Make Your Readers Cry
You’ve seen it all: show, don’t tell, plant a visceral image in the reader’s brain of the environment/character, write a complex character arc with lots of growth and setbacks, establish deep relationships, high stakes, etc. 
All the advice for making readers cry I’ve seen so far is basically that list. But, while those things are absolutely important, I find that the thing that always does the trick, whether as a tipping point or in and of itself, is this: 
THE CALLBACK! 
Before we move on, this is an ANALYSIS heavy post, so all the book + show examples contain spoilers!!
So, what do I mean by a “callback?” Think of Chekhov’s gun, but, here, you use the gun to pierce your reader’s heart. As a refresher for anyone who needs it, Chekhov’s gun is just a rule in writing that anything you introduce in the book should play some role in the plot.
Specifically, the name comes from the example that if a reader introduces a gun in the first act, it MUST go off later, (maybe, say, in the third act). For example, in the TV show Breaking Bad, the protagonist Walter White prepares a vial of poison (ricin) that he wanted to use to eliminate an opponent early on in the series. After the assassination attempt falls through, the ricin makes an appearance again in the very last episode of the show, when Walt finally uses it to kill another opponent. 
Got that? Alright, onto the examples of successful, tearjerking callbacks: 
1. The Last Olympian (Rick Riordan); “Family, Luke, you promised.” 
Context: The character Annabeth says this line. Years ago, Annabeth had run away from home, and Luke had effectively adopted her into a found family with another kid named Thalia. Common reason for leaving home = parental trauma! Yay! He promised Annabeth that they would be each other’s “family” from now on. 
Now: Kronos, the antagonist titan, has possessed the demigod Luke and uses his body to strike Annabeth, injuring her. She’s also holding a dagger that Luke had given her when she joined his “family.”
Significance: her words + the dagger are a mental + physical reminder to Luke of his promise. They force him to recognize the sheer degree of his current betrayal by bringing him back to a different time. The fact that their found family only happened because of parental trauma bringing them together makes it worse—Luke felt abandoned by his Olympian father, Hermes. Now, he realizes that he basically did the equivalent to Annabeth by joining the titans. 
2. Les Miserables (Victor Hugo); Jean Valjean’s death 
Context:  At the beginning of the book, the bishop had caught Valjean trying to steal candlesticks to sell. Instead of handing him over to the police, the bishop told the police that he had given them to Valjean, saving him from arrest and showing him mercy. This changed his life forever, kickstarting his character redemption arc. 
Now: Jean Valjean dies surrounded by his loved ones, remembered as a benevolent man who bettered thousands of lives. He’s surrounded by light from candlesticks that once belonged to a bishop.
Context: Valjean had once taken in an impoverished woman named Fantine, showing her mercy and promising to take care of her daughter, Cosette, after Fantine died. Valjean then rescued Cosette from abusive quasi-foster parents (it’s a long story), raising her as his own daughter. This furthered his arc by allowing him to finally understand how unconditionally loving someone feels. 
Now: Valjean describes Fantine to Cosette, who never knew her mother. 
Significance: Both examples throw readers back to much earlier points in the story before the completion of Valjean’s character arc. In a way, this final scene feels like an external manifestation of his kindness paying off; both he and the reader feels a sense of accomplishment, relief, and just a general “OMG WE MADE IT.” Readers don’t feel cheated, because they were with Valjean every step of his 1,400 page arc. The weight of it all just crashes down on you...
3. Your Lie in April (anime); Kaori’s letter after she dies
Context: Kaori’s entire plot significance is that she helps Kousei, a piano prodigy who can’t play piano anymore due to traumatic parental memories associated with it, play again—but also, just to help him enjoy life again after a turbulent upbringing. She meets him a year before she dies of a medical condition, and her free spirit + confidence influences him to find beauty in life and music again. They basically do a crap ton of crazy funny stuff together lol
Now: Kaori has died, and she leaves a letter to him. Among other general confessions and thoughts, she references things they did and memories they shared: she says, “sorry we couldn’t eat all those canelés,” reminisces about  jumping with him off a small bridge into the stream below, “racing each other alongside the train,” singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star as they rode the bike together, etc.
Significance: Yes, the nature of the letter is just sad because she’s revealing that she loved him all along, apologizing for not being able to spend more time with him, lying that she didn’t like him (to spare his feelings b/c she knew she would die soon), etc. BUT, these small details highlight exactly how many experiences they shared, and the depth of their relationship. Thus, they emphasize the significance of her death and the emptiness it leaves behind. 
4. Arcane (show); “I thought, maybe you could love me like you used to, even though I’m different.” 
Context: Character Jinx says this in the last episode to her now estranged older sister, Vi. Without going into the crazy complex plot, basically, orphans Vi and Jinx used to care for each other before a bunch of crap went down that got them separated. They then grew up on opposite political sides; Jinx grows up on the side of the underbelly city rebellion, and Vi grows up working on the side of the richer city that essentially oppresses the undercity. Thus begins the development of their opposing viewpoints and work environments, to the point where they always meet on opposite sides of a political battle, never able to come together as a family or understand each other again. 
Now: After a super dramatic confrontation, Jinx reveals that although she wants Vi to love her like she did before their separation, she knows it’s not possible because “[Vi] changed too.” She finishes with, “so, here’s to the new us” before blowing up a political council meeting a few blocks down filled with people Vi sides with. Oops! This cleanly seals the fate of their relationship as something basically irreparable.  
Significance: This callback isn’t through literal flashbacks or items like in the previous examples. Jinx’ lines are enough to bring back images of their childhood to the audience’s mind. Now, the audience subconsciously places this image of: 1) two sisters so different, hurt, and torn apart, right next to 2) the image of two sisters as innocent children who loved each other and would care for each other no matter what. 
Why do callbacks work so well? 
If you’ve noticed something in common with all of them, you’re right: they remind audience of a time BEFORE the characters have come so far on their arcs, developed, and put on so much more emotional baggage. 
Callbacks force the audience to SUDDENLY and IMMEDIATELY feel the weight of everything that’s happened. The character’s anguish and overwhelming emotions become the audience’s in this moment. Callbacks are a vehicle for the juxtaposition of worlds, before and after significant development. 
This works because we, as mortals, fear IMPERMANENCE the most. We fear LOSS. For us, time gone is time we will never get back; callbacks make us face that exact fact through a fictional character. A lost moment, time period, or even part of oneself may hurt as much as losing a loved one, and nothing makes humans grieve more than the realization of a loss. A callback slaps the audience in the face with the fact that something was lost; loss hurts so much because almost 99% of the time, what’s gone is gone forever. 
Of course, a good callback requires good previous character development, stakes, imagery, and all that jazz, but I thought I’d highlight this specifically because of how under covered it is. 
∘₊✧────── ☾☼☽ ───���──✧₊∘
instagram: @ grace_should_write
I’ve been binging general media lately: I finished Death Note, Your Lie in April, and Tokyo Ghoul all within like a month (FIRST ANIMES I”VE EVER WATCHED!!), reread lots of Les Miserables, analyzed a bunch of past shows like Breaking Bad, watched a bunch of My Little Pony, worked to fix up my old writing... and that’s not even all! The amount of times I’ve CRIED while enjoying the above media and so much more honestly just inspired this post. 
Like, no joke, my eyes were almost always swollen during this period whenever I hung out with my friends and it was so embarrassing help 
Personally, I just find that this method works super well for me, and I watched a bunch of reaction videos to these above scenes (and read book reviews on the book scenes I mentioned), and it seemed that just about everyone cried during these parts. That’s when I realizes that the callback might also just be a universal thing. 
Anyway, this post is long and dense enough as is. SORRY! As always, hope this was helpful, and let me know if you have any questions by commenting, re-blogging, or DMing me on IG. Any and all engagement is appreciated <3333
Happy writing, and have a great day,
- grace <3
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thefirstknife · 4 months ago
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Literally every time I tune in for a story update and think "there's no way I'll be taking emotional damage this week" and then I do.
First I really like the added context about what an Echo is, from Ikora:
Genocide. Thousands of civilisations across the universe, all visited by the Black Fleet. All lost to the violence of the final shape. That's where this Echo comes from. At least, that's our theory. Reports from the Pale Heart, readings on the Valence emanating from the Traveler... Everything we faced when we stared down the Witness and broke its fleet. At first, we didn't know what to call them. But Echoes seemed apt. Memories from the victims of the Pyramids, held by the Darkness... then coalesced by the Light into artifacts as sharp and fatal as their pain. If Darkness is memory, and Light is form... What else could they be? But... there's still so much we don't know. Is this the only one? What forgotten people gave form to this Echo? What was their final cry at their end? For control? A means to turn back their oppressors? My Hidden will keep searching for whatever answers the Witness' death can give us... hopefully they number more than the questions it left behind. But we need to stop the Conductor and secure the Echo. Guardian, descend into Nessus. Massive amounts of radiolaria has been diverted beneath the planet's crust. We need to find out what the Vex are building there.
I think it's fair to assume that the memory of the Qugu is what formed this Echo then. That's fascinating also because of what other species we might learn about in the next two episodes.
Psion mention:
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Show us the Psions. What are they doing. Don't throw these hints at me, at the same time with Otzot and OXA hints.
And then the emotional damage??? First Saint on the holoprojector:
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Guardian. I hear that you are hard at work on Nessus, following the Echo and the Conductor. I know you do this in part for me, but... I do not know if I am worth the trouble. I was pulled through Nessus like a toy on a string. The Conductor's words still echo in my mind, "A copy of a copy of a copy." Osiris pushed through time to find his Saint-14. [sighs] He said he was careful, but... he reached blindly, and pulled out... only me. And no... I live a life tat does not belong to me. I am something left over from a broken timeline... a remainder. The Conductor whispered I should be thrown away... A solution as simple as, correcting an error. And maybe... that would- Ah! I-I do not know what to think anymore.
Saint. "Not worth the trouble"? Saint, I personally walked through the corridors of time to get you out. I had to see your dead body with my own two eyes. I need to tell him this. He has to know. Oh my god.
But also. Osiris did not reach blindly. I am jumping off a cliff! He spent so much time and effort trying to find the right one in the right moment. That was the whole point. But Saint doesn't know this because Osiris never told him exactly what he did. If they don't mention everything we've done in Dawn, I am just going to walk into traffic. This Saint knows that we saved him. That we gave him the shotgun. We saw him in several different moments of his life and he carried the shotgun through: this is important because he died with it originally. So we know it's the right one. That's the only reason the Sundial worked out even; because we're tied to Saint via a paradox.
And then the radio. WHAT is happening.
Osiris: You're only doing this to hurt yourself, and I will not be a part of it. Saint-14: Osiris. Answer the question. I need to know. Osiris: It doesn't matter! Not like this. Saint-14: It matters to me. Please. How did I first tell you that I loved you? Osiris: Saint... [sighs] You had asked me for something, some tactical report. I gave it to you, and you thanked me, and-and you said that you loved me. You said it as if you had, already said it a thousand times before. I was not ready to say it in return, but... it was not long until I was. Saint-14: That is not... I do not remember it this way. That is not what happened in my... my simulation. We were together in the Tower, overlooking the City. Talking about... something small. And I said what I felt in that moment. And my Osiris did not hesitate to say the same. Osiris: "Your Osiris?" Saint, you love me. It doesn't matter how or-or where that began. Not in such fine detail. Saint?
I reiterate. What is happening. We know that the story Osiris told is true because we got it as a lore tab. And we also know that we saved the right Saint. We didn't pick one randomly as he thinks, Osiris and the YW went to great lengths to do this. So what's going on. Did the Conductor mess him up? Saint has not, until now, exhibited any issues with memory and has never had different memories from Osiris or anyone else. What did she do to him when he was yoked? Did she use the power over Vex to mess with his memories? Implant memories the Vex might have in the network about him from other timelines? I'm losing it.
Speaking of the Conductor, we got a firm confirmation it's Maya in the lore tab from Polyphony. And it's MSund12 so that also tells us which Maya; one of the copies from the Vex Network. It also details stuff about her shock upon learning about the Collapse and all that was lost and how humanity never truly recovered. She thinks she can... "help" by using the Vex and simulations. This also links to the mysterious lore tabs on the exotic items from the season pass.
Anyway, I'm perishing.
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cassiebones · 20 days ago
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Character Analysis: Rio Vidal
(because Aubrey Plaza currently has a chokehold on my psyche)
It hasn't been confirmed on the show, but we all know that Rio is Death, correct? They're not even being subtle about it, so I'm gonna take it from that angle.
Okay, so Rio is ageless. She prefers to take the form of Aubrey Plaza because Aubrey is a hot motherfucker. Agreed? Okay.
I have no idea when she would have come into existence, only because I have no idea the nature of Death in this universe. Is she one of many deaths? She must be, because people die all over and she has enough free time to build this hate/love relationship with Agatha, whom she finds the second the Darkhold stops hiding her.
I think she may specifically be Death for witches. She ferries magical humans to the other side, and has done since magic was first invented.
She was never a child, never a newborn. She was fully grown and cognizant from her inception, born knowing what her job was for her entire life. She existed in ancient times, seen by many mortals as different gods/goddesses. She took the shapes they'd already imagined her to have. She was Anubis, Hades, Shinigami, Osiris, Hecate, Charon...whom were all different entities, but she took their forms to bring comfort to the recently departed.
I feel like Rio had a lot of empathy for the first thousand or so years of doing this job. She listened to life stories as she ferried magical beings to their next journeys. She learned about society, about expectations, about why one might choose not to stay on the mortal coil, or why one might be taken from it by force.
She comforted the ones reticent to leave their physical bodies. She held the hands of too many young witches, taken too soon because of the fear that surrounded them. That's who she had the most empathy for: young, misunderstood witches.
Her empathy fades as humanity progresses. Witches are still persecuted, but many of them get on her nerves. They think so highly of themselves. They think they Death owes them something, that they deserve a second chance at life.
Nobody gets a second chance at life.
And while it's her job, she starts to kind of resent it. The spirits that won't leave piss her off. They disturb the living as often as they can and Rio gets blamed for it. This is why she hates ghosts.
But there's nothing she can do.
And then she meets Agatha. Agatha who is young and powerful and so scared when they first meet. Agatha, who has just caused the deaths of her entire coven. Agatha, who didn't mean to cause so much destruction; she just needs to be properly taught.
So Rio teaches her. I think they would have this kind of relationship where Rio fosters Agatha's talents, where she takes Agatha to places where she can be as destructive with her magic as she wants and nobody will judge or demonize her. And every time Agatha masters a spell or gives Rio that super proud smile, Rio falls a little more in love with her.
She revitalizes Rio's love for her job. And it's not like it's Agatha's fault that other witches keep attacking her. And it's not like she can truly control that siphoning thing every time it happens. It just is what it is.
Agatha feels bad the first time it happens, too. But then she takes on Rio's logic of "well, they shouldn't have done that then," and all is well.
Agatha is alive and safe and Rio gets more bodies to ferry, more work. She actually really loves her work, especially because it means she gets to spend more time with Agatha, who just can't stop getting attacked for some reason...
There are rules to her job, of course.
First and most important rule: Death cannot kill. It is a conflict of interest. It wouldn't be very fair to give herself more bodies to ferry. Soon enough, there would be none left. In theory, at least. It's like insider trading, in a way.
Another one: Death cannot bring back life to one who has died. That is also not fair, and it's actually not even something she can do. She isn't Life; she's Death.
And: Death must ferry souls as soon as possible to the other life. Souls that linger too long become ghosts and it gets harder for them to cross over. It's considered a failure on her part when a Spirit becomes a Ghost.
She regrets ferrying Nicholas. That was her son, too. I will entertain no other theories. She loved that kid. She was just as much his mother as Agatha was. She knew how much it would hurt Agatha, but she also knew that she couldn't allow Nicky to become a ghost. It would be a torturous existence for them both. And if Agatha had her way and reanimated his body, forcing his soul to remain there, it would be so much worse.
It is her biggest regret and the only scar she has.
She doesn't have to lick wounds to heal them. That's just something she does for Agatha. Agatha either doesn't know this or doesn't fight it. I cannot even decide which one is funnier.
Rio is more than her job, though.
She is also a bottom.
Only for Agatha.
Moving on.
When Agatha uses the Darkhold to disappear, whatever beacon spell they'd had on each other since practically the beginning of their courtship is interrupted. She cannot find Agatha. She cannot even see Agatha, not even if she was two inches from her own face. Agatha makes it so they never run into each other, no matter whom she kills.
And then Wanda gets the Darkhold and it's like a fire alarm blaring in Rio's ear. She goes immediately to Agatha's side.
Yes, immediately. You know that was not a three-season delusion that Wanda put her under. "Agnes" had many, many different TV shows running through the spellbound mind. She just wasn't broken out of it until Teen got there.
Herb was so nonchalant about her little "true crime bug" that there had to have been several different medical series, soap operas, firefighter shows, other cop shows, comedies, home improvement shows, reality shows (The Real Housewives of West View?), and a mockumentary or two that came before it.
And Rio was a guest star in all of them, willing Agatha to just wake up. But Agatha didn't recognize her. She just knew that she hated her, in every single mind show. She just hated Rio Vidal.
And Rio was just in a hell of her own making, trying desperately to break Agatha out but not knowing how.
She loves this woman so much. All the threats to kill her and telling others where to find her? Foreplay. I can totally see them trolling each other as they ran around New England, pointing fingers at one another, calling out "Witch!" and snickering as the torches are lit.
Their sex breaks down houses. They have done it in a grave. Rio attempts to murder Agatha at least twice a day at their peak; it's called flirting, Jennifer.
Agatha, obviously knowing that Rio can't actually kill her (and she cannot kill Rio for obvious reasons), feels safest when she's around. Because Rio defends her. She knows the things that Agatha has done and she loves her (not in spite of them, but sort of because of them. Girl's a freak.) anyway.
And Rio hates her mother-in-law, Evanora, with a passion. She definitely has a list of people she hates from all the souls she's had to ferry. A lot of white Puritan men are on that list for their role in the Salem Witch trials. But Evanora is #1 on that list. It's on sight for that bitch.
And I think that makes Agatha soft for Rio. Because nobody has ever defended her against her mother, for her whole childhood. Nobody except Rio.
Which is why Agatha is definitely the one who proposed.
It was a mundane kind of day. Her powers had just killed another coven. Before they attacked, however, one of the witches called Agatha a "Witch-Killer" and said that her mother had always been right about her. She'd heard of how evil Agatha was as a child and this just proved it.
Rio's hands had glowed green and as she took the woman by the throat, slamming her against a tree, screaming at her, telling her about how the true evil was the woman who hated her own child so much as to plan a whole execution after abusing her for her entire childhood. How Agatha was a survivor and so much more powerful than her mother could ever hope to be. And that witches like her had to wake up to it and--then the witch blasted Agatha and it was all over.
Rio huffed as she dropped the empty husk of a body, glaring at the spirit as it floated above it.
"That was your own fault," she said. "If you had just listened to me, none of this would have happened."
The witch just glared and Rio rolled her eyes, collecting the souls of the other witches who had attacked Agatha along with this dumb with.
"I'll be right back," she promised Agatha, who was still thrumming with magic.
"Marry me!" Agatha said as Rio disappeared.
She was halfway through with the job when the words registered in her mind. She got them across in record time, returning to find Agatha on her knees, waiting for her, a purple ring of something she'd made from magic. She was smiling up at Rio, tears in her eyes.
"What did you say?" Rio asked, her heart pounding.
"Marry me," Agatha repeated, her voice tight. "Rio Vidal, will you marry me?"
"Yes!" Rio dropped to her knees and tackled Agatha to the ground, raining kisses down on her while Agatha laughed.
And then they got married and lived happily for a century or two, until they had a son. I have no idea how Nicholas came to be. I have no idea why he is a Scratch rather than a Harkness or a Vidal. But I know he had two mommies who loved him more than anything. Rio probably never thought that she could be a wife to anybody, let alone a full mother, but she loved that boy. And she loves Agatha.
Rio has a big heart and she's a bit intense, but we love that for her.
11/10 character
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swampgallows · 3 months ago
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i know 'video game lady sameface' is not a new gripe by any means but i cant get over how blatant it is on this war within promo art. for anyone not familiar with warcraft this looks like the 'i can be yuor angle or yuor devil' meme of the same character and it's not. i also love that they couldn't actually overlap the faces here because it would otherwise be giving warcraft 3 arthas implying they are the same person (which, again, they are not, not even in a 4d chess conspiracy theory way; if anything xal'atath designed herself after the npc inanis, chronicler of whispers, rather than alleria).
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even sylvanas on the book cover looks more like two different women than xal'atath and alleria do in the promo art above (and hilariously these are all three different elves. one of which is not actually an elf. and alleria and sylvanas are sisters... oogh). also not sure why they went with the hyper-youthful redesign for alleria, the oldest windrunner sister stuck in some kind of ten thousand year interdimensional time loop fighting demons while maybe 20 years went by on azeroth, who is now constantly grappling with the whispers of the void. like maybe she can look a little haggard. maybe she doesn't need to look like a scrappy teenager in the key art
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why did they moe-ify her
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like maybe it's because i'm in my mid-30s now but like, on one hand, yes sombra overwatch can be 30 and look like that because women don't automatically become decrepit once they exit their twenties. but also maybe we should not be afraid of women who are literally tens of thousands of years old having gone through trauma after trauma (and in some cases literal death and decay) looking a teensy bit cooked. like why are the circles under jaina's eyes darker than sylvanas', who has the tears of anguish of undeath literally scarred into her face and has lived jaina's lifespan ten times over
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chronicallylatetotheparty · 3 months ago
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I think western media has relied on non-human races as shorthand for oppressed groups so much that audiences have been primed to look for that instead of actual imperialist ideology.
One of the criticisms I've repeated about the Dragon Prince is how the writers take the Aesthetics of fantasy imperialism/indigenous people and just switch them without bothering to change anything about their ideology or historical context.
Kenna on TikTok was right when she said that a franchise where the oppressor and oppressed were all the same species makes a better racism allegory.
The fact that the Four Nations were all human added to the themes of imperialism and genocide in ATLA. While on the opposite side of the coin, the Xadians all being different species undermines it.
You can say Fire Nation people were a bunch of imperialists without going into bioessentialism. You CAN'T say humans are a bunch of warmongering monsters without sounding like an eco fascist.
The Sunfire elves textually being the most fantasy racist group is fine because they're elves, therefore oppressed, and the white writers made them superficially based on African-French speakers.
Meanwhile Katolis is "obviously" a Fantasy European Imperialist nation and therefore the oppressor. Never mind that it's had a black, now mixed, ruling family for a thousand years. Or that it's citizens aren't just white.
I remember seeing a post comparing the taboo against Black Magic to Xtian fundamentalism. At first I thought that was a bit much but no. Season six revealed that TDP has a canonical Hierarchy of Beings so that guy was absolutely right.
In Xtian fundamentalism doing something good the "wrong" way is the same as doing something bad.
Save a kingdom from starving? Well you had to kill a rock monster so obviously the right thing to do was let hundreds of thousands of people starve to death. (I've had weirdos go onto my posts and literally say this.)
Break the chains preventing you from saving the people you love? Well it hurt you so the right thing to do was let your friends and loved ones drown I guess.
Your son is dying? Better protect some old man's sense of moral purity than save a child.
All of these actions are not considered bad because they had a negative effect. They're considered bad because they go against the dominant power's desired order.
They're inherently bad because "humans" are inherently bad. Because human ways are not as pure as a direct connection to an Arcanum.
Note: this^ is imperialist ideology.
The idea that a group of people fighting for their survival justifies ethnic cleansing and mass murder is imperialist ideology.
The idea that the scary, blasphemous practices of a people you don't understand makes them dangerous, and therefore justifies you "defending yourself", is imperialist ideology.
The Liberal focus on "cycles of violence" and "both sides are at fault". Instead of on reparations for the people they killed and the homes they destroyed is imperialist ideology.
But Katolis has a pseudo-medieval aesthetic and the elves do not.
I was so angry at the scene where Sol Regem burns Katolis because THIS is the poor helpless dragons the humans "colonized"!? This living air bomber is the "victim" of the big, bad humans? One Archdragon can destroy an entire city single handedly and you expect me to believe the elves and dragons ethnic cleansing of humanity was REASONABLE!?
No. We are past any doubt or rationalization. What Sol Regem did to Katolis was just a small glimpse of what the elves and dragons did during the Human Exile. Just a small glimpse into how imperialist powers treat those that they cannot exploit.
And then demonize them for daring to oppose/question/subvert the imperialist's god(s) given superiority.
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j2hoes · 23 days ago
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A Twisted Romantic Fairytale (Wally Clark x Reader
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Word Count: 3K
A tragic tale of two star-crossed lovers.
Warnings: Death
The homecoming game of 1983 was a tragic tale of two star crossed lovers perishing beside one another. It’s a story for the history books and one Split River High would remember in the years going forward. One that students remember as a devastating if not twisted romantic fairytale. Two young lovers bound together for eternity.
Homecoming Game - 1983.
Excitement runs rampant through the air as everybody floods into the stadium, eager chattering of students combined with the cheerful melodies of the marching band fill me with joy. It’s not as if I haven’t been here before, I’m no stranger to the blinding lights of Split River football stadium. In fact I’ve been cheering on the sidelines at every football game for the past four years or so, but tonight is different. I’m unsure of whether the electricity I can feel within the air has always been there and I have simply never noticed, or if it has something to do with the fact that this is my last homecoming game of my high school career. It’s the one night that counts. After all, it’s hard to miss the countless recruiters already situated within the stands.
“There you are! God, I’ve been looking all over for you!”
Upon hearing the familiar voice, I can’t help but smile. Turning my attention away from the water fountain where I had previously been filling my water bottle, to see the dark haired jock that makes my heart race.
Wally Clark. Where do I even begin to describe this boy? 
I first met Wally on the second day of senior year. My family had just moved to Split River from Amber, Nevada, following my father’s transfer within the police department. Having accepted a promotion, despite the fact it meant we had to uproot our entire lives and move almost two thousand miles away.
It’s fair to say that I had been a complete mess, struggling to find my feet in a town that was the complete opposite to everything I had been used to. Not to mention the constant arguing between my parents caused by the stress of the move. Feeling so overwhelmed by my entire life changing so quickly, I couldn’t bring myself to attend first period and instead found myself tucked away in the bleachers, smoking a cigarette with shaky hands.
It was at that moment that Wally had found me, with a warm smile on his face, he comforted me. Welcomed me to the strange new town of Split River. Offered to sit with me in the cafeteria at lunch despite being a total stranger. However, something about the way things took place felt incredibly natural. As though this was the way things were meant to be.
Wally and I became inseparable from that moment forward, he encouraged me to join the cheerleading team. Insisting that it was only because he knew it was a passion of mine and not because it meant I would be forced to go to the football games that he just so happened to play. And how could I say no to that charming grin?
Throughout the years, we both learnt a lot about one another. He listened and supported me as I discussed my turbulent homelife, detailing how my parents seemed to be getting closer and closer to divorce by the day and how in turn I became practically invisible to them. I was there for him following every argument he had with his mother, reminding him that his sole purpose in life was not just football. Ensuring he knew that he had other talents and qualities that were just as good if not better than his football skills.
We weren’t best friends, we were each other’s rock through thick and thin. So when he kissed me on the field, following yet another win for the team, I felt like I was floating on air. Unearthing all of the feelings I harbored for the jock, even if I had spent all that time trying to bury them.
Wally’s heart is so pure and full of love. Being on the receiving end of that love to the fullest extent is the greatest joy I will ever be able to experience. To have someone be such a bright light in your life is truly a blessing.
So if I had to describe Wally Clark? I’d say he was an angel brought down from heaven just for me.
“Excited for the big game my love?” Wally asks as he finally reaches me, wrapping an arm around my shoulder and placing a soft kiss on my temple.
“More nervous than excited. Kristine’s had us practicing a new move and with all the recruiters, I’m just scared I’m going to let the nerves get to me and mess up.” I admit, reaching my own hand up to hold his that remains over my shoulder as we begin to stroll through the crowds towards the locker rooms.
“You’re a superstar!” Wally exclaims, to which I’m unable to contain my laughter. “I mean it! You’re gonna smash it, honestly. I’ve never seen someone make cheerleading look as mesmerizing as you do. It’s borderline hypnotic, I’m telling you.”
“Sure, yeah, whatever you say.” I reply, tone sarcastic, yet his words of encouragement do make me feel ten times better. “Anyway, what about my favorite player? Are you feeling okay?”
I don’t miss the pained look that flashes briefly crosses his face before returning to his usual winning beam. I’m sure he’s just ready to get the game over with, wanting to return to some sense of normality and let loose at the dance. No longer having to deal with the overwhelming amount of pressure that his mom places on him to be the best.
“I guess I’m a little worried. My knee has been playing up for the past few days and coach said I needed to rest it, which is what I’ve been trying to do. I don’t know, I just don’t want to let anyone down, especially not my mom. Or you.”
As Wally finishes speaking we reach the doors of the locker room and I remove myself from his embrace to stand in front of him. Taking his hands gently in mine as I gaze up at the sweet boy. Noticing the slight gleam of worry and shame hidden deep within his coffee brown eyes.
“Whatever happens out there, you won’t be letting anyone down, I promise.” My voice is soft as I speak to him, wanting him to truly understand how little his performance matters. “Your mom may be disappointed but she’ll get over it. As long as you’re happy, healthy and alive, that’s the most important thing. Just don’t push yourself too hard, I know how important it is to you that you make your mom proud but she’ll be proud of you no matter what. I mean, how could she not be? You’re amazing Wally Clark.”
The footballer smiles, wrapping his arms around me before pulling me into his body tightly. Resting my head against his chest, I close my eyes for a moment, allowing myself to relax in his embrace and breathing in deeply to take in the deep oaky scent that is Wally. He rests his head atop of mine and I can feel him squeeze me gently, hands scrunching up the fabric of my t-shirt as he does so.
“Wally Clark, better get yourself in that locker room right now! It’s almost showtime!” I hear the coach yell and my boyfriend sighs, slowly releasing me from his tight hold.
“Now go show everybody just how amazing you are.” I whisper, lovingly gazing up at him.
He nods as though in confirmation with my previous statement, before taking my face in his hands and slowly leaning down to interlock his lips with mine. Delicately and with the remaining hint of nerves racing through his body, his lips move gently with mine. My cheeks feel burning hot compared to the brisk coldness of his hands, caused by the icy fall winds, though I don’t seem to mind. Embracing the sweetness of Wally’s mouth and the tenderness of every move he makes.
It’s with much reluctance that we pull away from one another, however, after catching a glimpse of the coach’s disapproving look, I know the moment is over. Sending the jock to get himself ready with a swift peck to the cheek, him offering me a cheeky wink in return as we both slink off to our respective locker rooms.
The next time I see Wally is when the team makes their grand entrance onto the field. A big cheesy grin rests on my face as I hear the crowds' screams of support, waving flags and homemade banners to cheer on the team. With a few cheers of my own, a couple of the girls and I begin to hype up the crowd even more, jumping wildly and encouraging their yells.
As I shoot a quick glance over to the field, I’m able to spot my boyfriend easily, even with his helmet on. Smiling brightly at me even as he runs towards his team to discuss their play. My heart flutters knowing that he still makes an effort to look for me even as the game is about to begin.
“Alright girls, you know what to do!” Kristina shouts, alerting us to take up our positions and prepare for the first routine of the night.
Noticing the game is about to commence, I feel myself worrying less about messing up the performance, focusing solely on Wally and his uplifting words from moments earlier. Sharing gleeful smiles with my fellow cheerleaders, I can’t help but feel a sense of excitement as the music roars through the stadium.
The next few minutes pass by in a blur, with the Split River football team taking an early victory and our routine flowing perfectly without a single fault or mistake. It’s almost too good to be true.
With our final move only seconds away, I feel the nerves return once more as I boost myself into the hands of the other girls. Their hands wrapped around my ankles and calves to ensure my safety and support whilst in the air. It’s only when I’m hoisted into the air that my stomach twists. Something doesn’t feel right but I’m unable to do anything. Everything happens in slow motion and as I catch sight of the ground looming towards me, I’m hit instantly by the fact that I’m not going to make my mark. I’m not going to land firmly in the hands of the girls beneath me.
I suppose the one good thing about all of this is that I only have a split second to panic before my body plummets to the hard asphalt below my feet. The thump my body makes as it slams against the ground is enough to make anybody squeal.
Cheerleaders scream. Music cuts off.
Then I simply feel nothing.
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Wally’s the first to notice the chaos unfolding at the side of the field. Distracted by whatever seems to be taking place, he doesn’t notice the opposing team's player bolting towards him. He lands with a grunt, knee buckling and sending a sharp shooting pain through the length of his leg.
As he rises to his feet, he hears the whistle blowing repeatedly, noticing the chaos begin to grow larger. With furrowed brows he finds himself jogging towards the crowd, even if it does cause him a significant amount of pain that he tries desperately to hide.
Pushing through the screaming group of footballers and cheerleaders, it’s at that moment that he sees her. Lay unmoving against the concrete, his heart stops momentarily. Feeling sick to his stomach at the sight of his beautiful girl lifeless, body contorted in ways he didn’t know physically possible. 
Wally drops to his knees, students stepping away from him as he does so. Not knowing how to comfort the poor boy in this time of need. The physical pain he is feeling in his leg is nothing compared to the emotional turmoil he is going through right now. Dragging her body on to his knees and cradling her delicately, in fear of breaking her anymore.
With clouded vision, he stares down at his love, body releasing wails and sobs he had never once made in his life. Blood stains his hands, his jersey, his trousers and yet he doesn’t care. Overwhelmed by his grief, watching the color drain from her skin. He doesn’t think anything could be more painful, nothing in his life could compare to the trauma of his girlfriend sprawled out in his arms.
Wally struggles with the ambulance crew as they begin to remove her body, his coach restraining him as they place her in the back of an ambulance. The jock barely acknowledges his coach telling him that he’s been benched as he watches with heartbreak as the ambulance drives away and in his distress all he can do is cry on the sidelines.
With his mom standing behind him, badgering him about winning a scholarship and needing him in the game, Wally feels nothing but rage. All his life, he’d done right by his mom, wanting her to be proud of him, wanting her to acknowledge his successes but right now, he wanted nothing more than to tell her to close her mouth.
Instead, he finds himself marching over to the coach, begging to be put back into the game, arguing that he needs something to take his mind off what he just witnessed and that he is in fact in the correct headspace to win. And somehow, his efforts pay off much to his surprise. Back in the game, Wally has more strength than ever. Fuelled by his rage and his grief.
Whilst he finds it distasteful and disrespectful that the game continues despite his sweet girl losing her life only moments before, he plays with the knowledge that she’d want him to win. She would want him to succeed and so he tries. He tries for her because if not for her, then he has no other reason to keep going. She was the one good thing in his life that kept him from going off the deep and without her, he doesn’t know how he will continue. So for now, he simply focuses on the game.
The sharp pain in his knee grows stronger and with every passing minute he struggles more and more. Trying desperately to ignore it, he claims the ball, running at full speed towards the touchline and yet as he runs directly towards an opposing player, he makes no effort to slow down. Not thinking about the potential consequences of his actions.
He hits the ground with a devastating blow. World shrouded in darkness almost immediately. However, he feels more at peace than he ever has.
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I watch with bated breath as Wally tumbles aggressively to the floor, the crack ripples throughout the stadium and I can’t help but gasp. Throwing my hands across my mouth as I fixate on the footballers rushing to his aid. My mind races at one million thoughts per minute, why did he go back out onto the field? Why didn’t he move out of the way? How could he be so reckless?
I’m so wrapped up in my own thoughts that I almost miss the tall jock standing watching over his own body as people hopelessly attempt to resuscitate his cold body. Before I can even react, I’m slowly walking towards him, even with his back towards me I can tell he’s in pain. Hands in his hair, tugging slightly as he comes to the realization of what has happened.
My hands are shaking the closer I get, breath caught in my throat as I swallow the lump in my throat. I’m not entirely sure why I’m scared, perhaps simply afraid of what this means for us now?
“Wally.” My voice is small, timid. Hands clasped together over my chest as I anxiously await his reaction.
As though he doesn’t believe it, Wally’s body goes stiff. When he finally faces me, his mouth falls open in shock, eyes holding the same softness that they did in life and I smile hesitantly. He’s the first to break the tension, scooping me up in his arms and holding me tighter than he ever has before.
“I’m sorry Wally, I’m so sorry, I promise I didn’t mean for this to happen.” My voice breaks as I speak, tears staining my cheeks. “I should’ve tried harder and then this would never have happened. You’d still be alive. I’m so sorry.”
“Hey, hey, it’s okay. Darling it’s okay. We’re together now, yeah?” Wally states, placing his arms on my shoulders as he fully takes me in, holding me at arm’s length as if he’s checking I’m okay. Not that it really matters now.
“What were you thinking? Going back out was so stupid and irresponsible and reck-”
“I didn’t want to let you down.” Wally whispers, eyes falling to his feet in shame. “I wanted to make it all worth it, I wanted you to be proud of me because I knew you’d be looking down on me.”
“Wally, I-”
“I don’t think I could live without you sweetheart. I don’t think I’d want to.” He admits, bringing one hand to my face, thumb stroking my cheek softly. “Seeing you there, all limp and lifeless, I didn’t just lose you. I lost something within myself too.”
“I’m so sorry.” I sob, allowing myself to release all the emotions built up inside of me.
“I still thought you were the most beautiful girl in the world.” Wally confesses, smiling adoringly at me. “I still do.”
A quiet giggle escapes my mouth, pulling the tall boy towards me and pressing my lips roughly to his. Wanting, no, needing to feel him against me. To feel the way his mouth dances with mine and the way his hands tenderly caress my waist. I just need him.
“So where do we go from here?” The jock questions, our foreheads restings against one another as we catch our breath
“I don’t know, but as long as you’re with me, I don’t really care.”
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rosenotactuallyquartz · 4 months ago
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things that the sketch rebecca just posted on tiktok, involving rose & bismuth, mean for pearlrose shippers:
if people didn’t believe rose was sapphic before, they should know now. this will (hopefully) be the end of that argument we often have to have with folks who claim rose was straight. so tired of those jokes that are along the lines of “lol pearl fell in love with the only straight gem” like please stop
gem love !! gem relationships !! are not like human relationships !! pearl has no bitterness towards bismuth, in fact, it’s very much the opposite. things like polyamory and open relationships are not labelled, but everyone loves each other and there’s not even a hint of a love triangle. they all explored what love means and how to express it on earth, and pearl was comfortable with her place in rose’s life for thousands of years
this says a lot about pearl’s feelings toward greg. people see this as jealousy because “rose chose greg over pearl.” she uses that term as a gem because rose’s death is very confusing to her and it appears as if rose chose greg because she died having a child with him when pearl believed she would live with rose on earth forever. she doesn’t understand that rose’s death has nothing to do with who she loved more—the reasons behind rose’s death involve a lack of love for herself and her love for steven/the earth. and it takes awhile for pearl to process this. i think she would rather believe that the reasons behind rose’s death involve rose loving someone else more. she doesn’t want to come to terms with the fact that rose didn’t want to live and thought everyone would be better off without her. the thought of rose loving someone more hurts pearl, but the thought of rose not loving herself hurts pearl more. this tells us that pearl was not “controlling” or “possessive” or “needy” as her haters in the fandom say she is. hopefully people can understand why she feels the way she does—everything that happened between rose, pearl, and greg is SO much more complicated than “love triangle.” it’s about death and the differences of human relationships clashing with gem relationships and wondering why certain things happened
this rosemuth kiss can mean anything. i personally think it was something rose only recently learned, as it happened during the war, and she wanted to show bismuth some affection when she was stressed about something. it’s up to you to interpret it how you want, and in this case, there really are no right or wrong answers since the sketch never became part of the show & there’s no further canonical explanation
that being said, prepare for some exhaustion on some other platforms. you know how some people still think pearl + rose is unrequited ?? or that rose never loved pearl as much as pearl loved her, and they completely misinterpret what pearl’s love for rose means? despite all the canon evidence and confirmation that pearlrose was not unrequited?? pearlrose haters might use this sketch as “proof that they didn’t have a relationship” or “proof that rose didn’t care about pearl” and honestly, we’re so tired of this, aren’t we? at least this is a space where we think similar things about pearlrose, and the sketch really doesn’t prove anything other than poly rosemuth + bispearl would be very cute, it reinforces that rose was sapphic, & it proves that pearl’s dynamic with greg is more about bitterness related to grief rather than possessiveness or pettiness. again, gem relationships are different from human relationships, and they simply just love each other and don’t label things. there’s no “cheating” or “fumbling,” just issues such as communication or personal struggles impacting relationships. and those are exactly the issues that pearlrose dealt with. it was never because of any lack of love for each other or loving someone else more.
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sky-is-the-limit · 2 months ago
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Title: Inverness.
Summary: At the end of MW3, we see Price, Gaz and Ghost scattering Soap's ashes into the wind because he had no one back home. What if he did?
TW: Mentions of death, Grief, Angst, just pure sadness.
WC: 2.1k
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You scrubbed the frying pan with an intensity that would have made your hands bleed if you could still feel them. The sponge grated against the metal but there wasn’t a single speck of dirt left to remove.
It gleamed just as it had every morning for the past five months, yet you kept at it, as if scrubbing could erase the nightmare that had become your life.
You didn’t want to think, didn’t want to feel, so you focused on the pan. This useless, spotless pan that he used to make you both breakfast that cursed morning.
The sound of the clock ticking gnawed at your nerves but you welcomed it. It was better than the silence that screamed in your ears, the silence that reminded you of everything you had lost. The same ritual, the same time, 7:05 a.m. Every single day.
Johnny’s face flashed before your eyes. How he looked that morning. Smiling, though you could see the worry in his eyes, deep into his features. You kissed him goodbye, your hands clinging to his uniform.
''Promise you’ll come back to me.'' You whispered, your voice barely more than a breath and he smiled, that crooked smile that always made your heart stutter, ''I always do.''
But promises were lies and you were a fool for believing them.
You hadn’t slept, not really, not since the nightmares began. Two, maybe three hours a night, if you were lucky. But even then, sleep was just another form of torture, bringing images you couldn't escape.
You saw him in your dreams, his body broken, bloodied in a thousand different ways. And no matter how much you screamed, no matter how desperately you reached for him, you could never save him. He was always just out of reach, just beyond your grasp, dying over and over again.
Then your hand slipped and the sponge clattered to the floor but you didn’t pick it up. You just stood there, staring at the wall, your breath hitching in your chest.
You should eat something, you knew that. You should go outside, feel the sun on your skin, breathe air that wasn’t thick with misery. But you couldn’t. The walls of your apartment had become your prison and you were too afraid to leave, too afraid of what waited for you outside.
Your friends had tried to help, bless them. They had come, one by one, sitting with you in that same kitchen, trying to coax you back to life. But nothing worked. Their voices were just noise, their concern an unbearable weight.
So you pushed them away, retreating further into the darkness, until the only company you had was this cursed frying pan and his ghost.
Turning your face to the side, your gaze drifted to the kitchen table, where the letter sat, still sealed, still untouched. What had arrived in his place, delivered by his Captain with a look that told you everything before he even opened his mouth.
The letter that contained words you couldn’t bear to read because once you did, it would all be real. Once you did, Johnny would be gone, truly gone, and you would be left with nothing but the ghost of a promise he couldn’t keep.
They say grief comes in waves and at first, they’re so overwhelming that you feel like you’re being pulled under. These waves hit unexpectedly, crashing into your sense of normalcy and flooding you with tears you thought you’d left behind.
But as long as the letter remained unopened, you could pretend. You could pretend that he was still out there, somewhere, alive and breathing, just waiting to come back to you.
It was a lie, you knew that but it was the only thing holding you together, the only thing keeping you from falling apart completely.
You couldn’t let him go. You weren’t ready. And maybe you never would be.
That day, life felt worth living, as if everything was falling into place without any effort. The sun was warm, the sky clear and your mind blissfully at peace. Johnny’s return was only days away and the thought of it made everything seem brighter.
You woke up that morning after a full eight hours of sleep and greeted the day with a smile, like always. Work had been the usual, nothing out of the ordinary and the evening was spent with friends, savoring every minute at your favourite corner cafe. There had been no reason to expect anything would change, that it would all come crashing down at exactly 6 p.m.
The knock on the door was unexpected, startling you from your thoughts. For a brief moment, you thought that Johnny would walk in but you paused, puzzled.
He had his own set of keys, so it couldn’t be him. Maybe it was the courier with that package you’d been eagerly awaiting, a little surprise wrapped in lace for when your boyfriend would return and so humming to yourself, you crossed the room.
Opening the door, your smile was ready, friendly and sweet, the kind you always wore when greeting strangers. The very first thing that made Johnny fall in love with you when he first met you.
However, the man on the other side wasn’t a courier or a familiar face.
He was tall, in his 40s if not more, though perhaps it was the untamed beard that added those extra years. He stood there in jeans and a black jacket, a beanie pulled low over his head.
For a moment, the thought crossed your mind that he might be a new neighbour, someone coming to introduce himself.
''Hi! Uh, Can I help you?'' You asked, welcoming, completely unaware of what was coming. He didn’t answer right away.
Instead, he stood frozen, like a statue, his expression a mask of unreadable emotions. Something about the way he hesitated, the way he just stared at you, began to chip away at your mood. Then, the envelope in his hand caught your eye and the world started to tilt.
''My name is John Price, ma’am-'' He finally said, tone low and controlled, though you could sense the strain in it. He paused, as if the next words were lodged in his throat, refusing to come out.
Everything after that moment was fragmented, slipping through your fingers like grains of sand. You faintly remembered him asking if he could come inside, his eyes reflecting a sadness that seemed to share in your grief. But it was not the same.
''I’m so sorry.'' The sympathy was genuine but it was also detached.
For him, Johnny was another soldier, a memory he would eventually leave behind.
For you? Johnny was everything. The beginning and the end of your world, the very essence of your existence. His death was not something you could ever move past. It was an abyss that consumed everything.
Price, was it? His name was Price. He placed a hand on your shoulder and squeezed. He kept apologizing, saying something about the funeral but the words were swallowed by pain.
As the door clicked shut behind him, the world around you fell apart. The room felt like it was collapsing in on itself, the walls closing in, pressing you into the earth.
A cry escaped your lips, raw and jagged, repeating over and over,
''No, no, no-'' The sound was guttural, a plea that couldn’t change anything but was all you could manage.
Falling to your knees, the floor seemed to rise up to meet you. Every breath was a battle, each inhale a ragged gasp that barely filled your lungs. Your hands clutched at your chest with a fierce desperation, gripping so tightly that the skin began to tear as memories started creeping through,
//
"I’m gonna take ye to the Highlands next summer." Johnny murmured and the smile in his voice was so vivid, you could almost see it without opening your eyes.
''Mm?'' The only reply you managed, a sleepy whisper against his skin.
"My dad’s side’s from Inverness-" He continued, his tone like a soft melody. "It’s so beautiful, lass. Ye hae to see it. I spent most summers there when I was a bairn."
A soft kiss on his neck was your only response, your eyes heavy with sleep.
''I’m gonna marry ye there.'' He declared, the promise as sweet as his voice.
Sleep had already pulled you under, leaving his words hanging in the air. The last thing you felt was the warmth of his body, the steady beat of his heart and the dream of a future that felt as certain as his arms holding you.
//
Finally, the pan was set aside, the water dripping off your numb fingers. They felt like they were encased in ice after being wet for so long and your throat was parched, having gone without water for hours.
If Johnny was here, he would be furious. He’d lecture you about not eating enough then insist on cooking your favourite pasta dish, all while talking your ears off with his affectionate scolding. He would take care of you, as he always did.
The letter still sat on the kitchen table, mocking you with its presence. No amount of wishing could make it disappear. It was a cruel reminder of what you couldn’t escape. You weren’t sure what was inside. Perhaps a confirmation of his death, or a note from his supervisors but the uncertainty terrified you.
In the quiet, as if Johnny’s presence was a whisper against your ear, you heard his voice, soft and reassuring, ''Dinnae be afraid, lass.. Ye have to open it. Ye have to set me free.''
Tears streamed down your cheeks as you moved closer to the wooden surface and the letter was now within reach, a final step toward confronting the truth you had been too afraid to face. The weight of it seemed almost unbearable before a ghostly encouragement echoed in your mind.
''Ye can do this, baby.''
Listening to him one last time, you reached for the envelope, your heart pounding in your chest. With a deep breath, you ripped it open, pulling out a piece of paper that was clearly torn from a larger sheet. The paper wasn’t formal, it was barely a ragged scrap.
''My Dearest,
I hope this letter finds you well, though I wish I was there to see your smile in person. I miss you terribly.
Every day here in England feels like hell, endless rain everywhere. I swear, the weather’s enough to make a Scotsman lose his patience! I keep dreaming about the day I can sit in that little pub next to our apartment, with a cold beer in hand, and laugh about how much I hate the English… weather, of course.
I wish I could be there right now, to hold you and tell you how much I love you. It’s not easy being away from you, and I’m counting the days until I can see you again.
I know things are hard right now but please remember I’m doing everything I can to stay safe. I have to remind you, though, with this shitty job, there’s always a chance I might not make it back. But I promise, I’m fighting to come home to you.
If something does happen and I don’t make it home, there’s something for you in my nightstand. I was saving it to give to you myself, but if I’m not there, I want you to go into our bedroom and get it.
It’s not meant to hold you back or keep you in the past if I’m not here. It’s a promise—a reminder that I will love you forever, in this life and the next one.
I love you more than words can say and I can’t wait to be with you again.
Yours always,
Johnny."
Sobs wracked your body uncontrollably as you clutched the letter to your chest, desperate to keep your tears from staining its precious words.
With shaky breaths, you began walking towards the bedroom, as if Johnny's voice was gently instructing your every move. You placed the letter gently on his pillow and sat on the edge of the bed. It felt right, a final gesture of love and farewell.
You had to do this, for him and for yourself.
With trembling hands, you opened the nightstand, the drawer sliding open with a hesitant creak. Inside, nestled in the shadows, was a small blue box. Underneath it, a postcard. Inverness.
The sight of it made your breath hitch. You already knew what was inside and the realization cut through you like a knife.
Slowly, with a sense of dread, you opened it.
There it was. A beautiful silver ring, its band engraved with intricate floral patterns on the inside.
With trembling hands, you slid the silver ring onto your finger. The cool metal felt strange but the emerald sparkled softly in the dim light, though you didn't pay it much attention. Instead, you laid down on Johnny’s pillow, you let your tears soak into the fabric. His scent was still there, somehow. Maybe you'd imagined it.
As you closed your eyes, you promised him. You'd carry on, for him and for you. You'd carry on and visit Inverness with him, so he would rest there.
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