#we adventure to random places we totally should be able to go

[thedorfmirrin]

Following himb

[woso-dreamzzz]

Shopping

Hardersson x Toddler!Reader

Part of The Big Adventures Universe

Summary: You go shopping

It was meant to be a quick trip to get groceries.

Pernille was splitting her time between being your mother, going to training and still somehow finding time to do all the chores.

Magda put it on herself to pick up the slack when she came over to visit which was how she ended up in this situation here.

You sitting in the cart, waving around your girl-swan and your girl-moose happily as Magda considers whether Pernille will be able to tell if she buys the cheaper, own brand stuff.

The cart is pressed right up against one of the shelves to make sure it's not blocking the aisle as Magda wonders what bread to buy.

There's a colourful packet of cakes next to you and you reach for them.

You know what to do when you go grocery shopping because Momma taught you.

You throw your cakes into the cart.

Magda whirls around instantly, frowning at the sudden noise.

"Did you put something in?" She asks, finger reaching out to tickle your chin.

You giggle, kicking your legs out as you shake your head.

"No?" Magda says," I think you did. Because I wasn't the one that put these cakes in. No? I should put this back then."

"No, Morsa!" You say," Keep!"

"Keep? Are you paying, princesse? I don't think you have money."

"Momma money!"

"Momma's money? You're going to spend Momma's money?"

You nod, hand reaching back for a tub of brownies.

"Whoa? We're grocery shopping, not princesse shopping!

You stick your tongue out. "For Momma!"

"Are you sure that's for Momma and not for you?"

"Momma!"

Magda sighs, shaking her head softly as her hand runs over your soft hair. "Alright, princesse, let's make an agreement, alright? I'll let you choose two things from each aisle but-"

You cheer, little arms waving in the air and Magda can't help but smile.

"-But only two things, alright? Otherwise we'll go broke."

"What that mean?"

"Don't worry, princesse."

So, you get your cupcakes and your brownies and Magda finally decides on the slightly fancier bread.

"No, princesse." She intervenes quickly when she sees you eyeing up some sweets and you pout.

"You say two! Know my numbers!"

Perhaps teaching you your numbers this early was a mistake because you can count to five all by yourself and you definitely know how many two is.

"But sweeties make your teeth rot and you have such pretty teeth."

"I do?"

"Very pretty teeth. We don't want them to go bad, do we?"

You look longingly at the sweeties but ultimately drop them.

Magda's feeling quite proud of herself as she ticks everything off of the list while also limiting your grabby hands.

It all goes downhill the moment you get to the miscellaneous aisle.

Magda's never quite sure why so many supermarkets have that random aisle of things like kid's toys and slippers and dog coats but without fail, there's one in every supermarket Magda has ever been in.

But that aisle is the one where your grabby hands can't be contained.

"Hey!" Magda says," I know you know your numbers and I know you know that's more than two!"

She picks the little dressing gown you've chosen out of the cart and places it back on the rack.

You pout, jabbing a finger into your chest.

"Bein' good!" You insist," Momma says special prize for bein' good! Always!"

"You're hustling me!"

"Don' know that word."

"It means...It doesn't matter what it means because Momma isn't here right now. I'm in charge."

You bare your teeth at her like a little kitten with puffed up fur and Magda has to smother her laughter.

"Please, Morsa? Be like Momma?"

"No-No! Don't...Don't start crying! I...No...Please stop...Okay! Okay one extra present for good behaviour!"

You grin at her, suddenly no hint of tears are on your face and you turn to look at your options.

"That one!"

Pernille isn't expecting a lot when she gets home.

Magda only flew in yesterday so while she had offered to do some of the chores around the house, Pernille was totally okay if her girlfriend decided she was much too tired to do anything.

Looking after you can be the extent of anyone's energy sometimes.

But, she's pleasantly surprised to see her cupboards and fridge stocked full of fresh groceries and something simmering on the stove.

The less pleasant surprise is the massive cardboard castle that's been built in her living room.

You're stood in the middle of it, armed with a wooden play sword and a pen that you're using to scribble on the castle walls to make it to your liking.

Magda is outside of the castle in fairy wings and a wooden spoon as a wand.

"What's going on here?" Pernille says, brow raised," Where did we get this castle?"

"Shop," You answer, reaching with your sword to bonk Magda on the head," My gift for bein' good."

"And all of the new snacks we have? Magda?"

Magda, rubbing her head, lets out a bout of nervous laughter. "More gifts for being good?"

"Brownies for you, Momma!" You interrupt, grinning and bonking Magda on the head again," Wanna come into my castle?"

"What about me? Why can't I come in?"

You grin, sword coming down yet again. "You're the mean fairy, Morsa. Mean fairies can't come in!"

[purplerose244]

Headcanons for a Camp Camp season post-David adopting Max

(Because I got back to Camp Camp for no reason at all and it is now everyone's problem. Also apparently new episode incoming? YOOO)

WARNING THERE ARE SWEARS IN THIS BUT I MEAN IT'S CAMP CAMP SO YOU KNOW 😅

Here we go!

No one knows at first

First episode starts with something random (Idk maybe something about change that makes everyone freaking out, you know how CC goes) and the entire time there are hints, like Max arriving at Camp with David and David always being in the proximity of Max. Towards the end Max makes a half-assed comment about it

Neil: Well, I guess some things never change

Neil: This place is still pretty fucked up

Max: Yeah, this is weirder than David adopting me at the end of last summer

(pause)

Everyone: WAIT WHAT?!

Casual episodes have background scenes where David puts a hand in front of Max whenever he wants to do something dangerous, or he picks him up

Max is now enrolled in Camp Campbell for Music Camp. He is never seen actually practicing during afternoon activities, he kinda just stands on his boot, but when no one is watching, especially at night, he does play a bit. He plays a guitar that was the first birthday present he got from David

He's genuinely good, he just thinks that the others will make fun of him for specifically playing guitar and ask him what campfire songs did David teach him

He's right and the answer is ALL OF THEM

Max is back to the plan of making David snap, but the idea evolved from "no way a person can be this happy" to "no way a parent can be this happy". That's totally NOT projection of his own trauma and he DOES NOT expect David to abandon him the moment it becomes too much (wink)

THE AMOUNT OF DAD JOKES ISTG. Max is 100% sure he'll go crazy out of tree puns alone. David is fully convinced that's peak dad behavior and non-negotiable

David: I'd love to take you on a vacation to trees' favourite city!

Max: David no.

David: Montreeal!

Max: DAVID NO.

David: Why so tense, Max? Are you okay?

Max: STOP RIGHT NOW.

David: Should I... leaf you alone?

Max: *groans forever*

A full episode where David is terrified of making preferences for his son and struggles between being a counselor and a father, fearing that the others might feel left out. Ultimately it is pointed out by everyone that Max was always his favourite, therefore he was a shit about it from the beginning and no one really cares (David feels relieved and quite conflicted about this)

Whenever the campers need permission to do something dangerous and there is REALLY no other option, Max sighs and does his best "please I really wanna do this, you are my guardian right?" act. It's embarassing how quickly David caves in

An episode about being a young single father, maybe David going on a date (I'm thinking the cute waitress from the Bonquisha episode and/or the bartender guy from the town episode, just to make some comebacks), having tons in common and getting along, but not wanting to commit with someone with a son. David feels pretty lonely, but he 100% can only be with someone that accepts Max as well (also pan David my beloved 🩷💛💙)

Max discovers David's tipping point when the kid gets seriously hurt because of a stupidly dangerous adventure. Max gets scolded like he didn't think David was able to. It follows a pretty tense period where Max thinks this is it, but David is just very embarassed for snapping like that and while he thinks Max can survive more than he can, he needs him to be safe. After talking they get much closer

David has no idea how to ground someone, especially his son. Usually, when he feels like he has to, he consults Gwen or, heaven forbid, Quartermaster

An episode where the ideal camper arrives. Loves outdoors, loves activities, loves singing along and saluting the flag, so David gets excited. The entire time the campers try to figure out if Max is jealous, but he shows no sign. Obviously the camper is someone evil because this is Camp Camp, and at the end Max stomps the person with a "sorry sweetheart, I'm his favourite"

Max doesn't call him dad, David knows this and never presses him. But the kid slips sometimes and corrects himself quickly, although David never seems to notice

He actually does notice and every night he proceeds to giggle into his log pillow like a high schooler with a crush

An episode where the campers try to figure out how the whole adoption situation happened, since neither Max nor David really explained it. The hypothetical story becomes increasingly crazier and more complex, between alien invations, warlocks and internal monologues. At the end a flashback is shown of Max waiting at camp. Gwen is in the cabin, then David arrives with his cheek red and bloody

David: It took some convincing

Gwen: Oh, David...

David: I'm alright. I knew who I was dealing with, and apparently they're this aggressive only to strangers. It could've been a lot worse, and they said yes anyway

Gwen: So... now what?

David: Now? Now I'm bringing him home

David had everything ready for adoption way before meeting Max, stating that as a counselor you never know what might happen. He thinks it's commendable. Max thinks it's fucking creepy

After The Forest episode David developed a bit of feral instincts, but never really showed them. Since Max can usually defend himself better than David does, there is no need to intervene. Until Daniel comes back, and makes the mistake of kidnapping Max this time, wanting to play with David on how to find his kid. He did not know. David turns into wolf dad, literally growling and hunting for his cub. Imagine a feral David roaring and growling "WHERE THE FUCK IS MY KID DANIEL??". Suffice to say, Daniel is sent to the hospital (praying the ultra lord) and Max starts to think, between Daniel and David, maybe it's his dad the psychotic one

He doesn't mind it that much

Possible outcome is Daniel being astonished by such energy, realizing that David just won't die, and feeling something strong for him, starting to ponder if David is an reincarnation of Xemug... he is giving himself an excuse, he basically just got a crush on David. If that would turn him madder or start his redemption arc, I have no idea, but I kinda like it 😂 (actually I might make a separate post about this, I got an idea for another season sequel to this one and yes, pretty Dadvid 💕💕)

Post this incident that ruined it, Mr. Honeynuts now wears a little Camp Campbell counselor uniform. David made it of course, and while Max voices his contempt, the bear was getting rough to hug and the shirt is soft

Idea gag of Max saying "did you know that *insert disturbing emotional abuse practice* isn't okay? Learned that last year"

They got blackmail material on each other. Max obviously uses it the most, between embarassing underpants and sleep talking, but in extreme cases David is not above pulling out his cute Max photo collection

Yes, he got several of those

Yes, he is waiting for someone to ask about it and show them like the proud parent he is

After David adopted Max, he started to work two jobs to make ends meet (I'm thinking teacher and maybe night guard, very standard). He's actually pretty good at both, but it makes him very exhausted. He once snapped at Max out of exhaustion and since then, he decided to rest whenever he feels tired (you know, like a normal person). Max jokes that he was supposed to make his life a nightmare, not help him develop a better and healthier lifestyle

They got a method for asking permission, "bullshit for fun": David allows him some usually unallowed stuff and he gets to have some cute father-son moments in exchange

Max: Okay, it's a huge concert, so I'm willing to go as far as a full week of tucking in bed

David: I'm not letting you go out of town all on your own that easily, young man! The week of that, and three days of hand holding when we get into a crowd!

Max: Mmm... one hand holding and... urgh... one day of camping together

David: WAIT, REALLY?!

Max: It's a really good concert

David: DEAL!!!!

During a particolarly bad night of Max having nightmares, David spends the night comforting him. Max jokes that perhaps David can get even a hug out of this. David states that their system is a fun thing between them for treating responsibilities and boundaries in a less serious way, but if Max needs comfort, that's always free

An episode in which Max hears David talk to Gwen, saying stuff like "I don't have enough money for him. I don't think I can make it. I'm so sorry, poor Max". He then starts the most effective escape from Camp Campbell plan he has ever put in motion, genuinely making it except he comes back because he misses everything. He screams at David for making him love him only to dump him. At last David understands the situation and hugs him, revealing that... he was talking about a dog he wanted to adopt for Max. Max will never live that down, and David is in absolute glee for the following days because his son loves him

Sometimes Max says "Language!" without realizing. It's horrifying for all people involved, even David

On the other hand, David starts to swear more. The thing is, he's used to Max and it's such a foreign thing to him that sometimes he doesn't realize it was him

David: Hold on, now where the fuck is everyone?

David: Language!

David: ... wait-

Idea crossover headcanon, David's last name is Corduroy, his dad is a cousin of the Corduroys of Gravity Falls. But as a matter of fact, David never calls his father dad, going for either sir or sergeant

I have the idea of introducing this father in an episode flashback from before the adoption. David's father, sergeant Jeffrey Corduroy, comes to the camp to "visit his son and reconnect after such a long time". The man is huge and affable, friendly like David, but David turns into a Max version of himself when he's around. After everyone states that he seems cool, David gets pissed even more and basically ditch camp activities the whole day

Max gets a moment alone with the sergent and presses a little more, thrown off by meeting the first person David seems to openly hate. As Max is being Max, Jeff loses it pretty quickly, revealing the kindness is a mask. As he is on his way to hit Max, David puts himself in between. He scolds his father, mad like never before, stating that one apology won't make up for ten years of hell. Jeff leaves, David is so tired his legs won't hold, Max helps him get back to the cabin and they stay there

When the two are alone eventually, David tells him his story: he actually learned about survival from his dad first, he got trained mercilessly to the point of spitting blood, for ten long years. At some point his parents decided to divorce, and he was sent to Camp Campbell to not be in the way. He felt happy there for the first time, but he spiralled after leaving, as his dad left and his mother was depressed. She sent him to France at the clown school, again to not be in the way, and when he was old enough he simply left his house to find his own way to be happy. The only place where that was, was Camp Campbell

David apologizes for making his first story about camp too cheerful, as he should have been sincere. Max comes to two conclusions that night: that they are way more similar than he expected (something he didn't believe when he first heard the camp story from David), and that... maybe David is kind to everyone because he used all the hate he has on that asshole

Possible last episode of the season is another Parent Day. Everyone is teasing Max over the fact that every day is Parent Day for him, and Max complains but passively shows how he can't wait for it. Obviously David is way too gleeful about it. Then David disappears and no one knows where he is, and Max gets in the worse mood possible, making it everyone's problem. Everyone is actually kinda supportive and that turns him from angry to simply sad, although Gwen states that whatever happened to David, he promised to be there therefore he will be

At the exhibition part, when it's Max' turn, David arrives just in time, running in full survival attire like in The Forest. Basically David had another canoe incident, and was hunted down by two more wolves. It turns out that they're the pups of the wolfie he befriended before, they were hunted by men and that's why they were very aggressive towards him at first. Another adventure ensued, with the pups learning how to survive nature

Of course this is not explained to the people (just like The Forest), David apologizes for the late, Max says "fuck you dad" and hugs him in front of everyone

Follows the most mundane celebration between parents, with David (after taking off the survival look) looking a bit goofy and uncomfortable with so many adults while being a young man, but he does his best. Finally a moment of tranquility for the campers, as they watch their parents

Neil: You know Max, maybe you had to learn to appreciate the hell that is Camp Campbell, to meet a parent that truly cared for you. Maybe it was all a learning experience, and this is your reward

Max: ...

Neil: ...

Max: Well, this place sucks, and my dad is a fucking idiot. Definitely not worth it

(Max scoffs, then he smiles at David waving at him. The other campers hold back laughter, clearly not believing him)

It's implied that from then on Max starts calling David dad full time

[kakhaev-ivan]

dance till you die

so me back to lab. i guess i will just write presentation on NeRF model without camera parameters. I wonder how long it will take me.

tomatos: 🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅🍅

two pomodors takes a fucking eternally. feels like i can do something actually productive instead of what im actually doing, but usually it’s not the case.

words cost nothing, so just write to your heart content.

i can share my insane theories here. do you think that all the things before where so organic and chaotic because ppl did everything with their hands. they just have to build a place where our authentic minds can rest from chaos? where symmetry and precision are ruled? i talking about churches of course. now you can find symmetry and precision everywhere. but i don’t really know history, i just think it’s a interesting thought.

i lived for so long, but it’s feels like i always alone. not sure if that is common thing or not. I like science but don’t really do anything with that, maybe i need to start to make observations on smth… i already living in this world for almost 30 years, hmm counting tiles on buildings are fun but useless. weather just changes. i feel like i can do with my obsessive personality, loneliness and data analysis skills, but not sure what.

all my things screaming “count random things” but i think finding patterns and correlations between things is more interesting. on all my ramblings chatgpt suggested me to join citizen science projects.

maybe i can make a wind speed monitor, or built small submarine to monitor water and see levels? pretty sure i’m not smart enough to do that, but i just tired of sitting and doing nothing while my body is slowly dying.

I remember being a boy in a village without internet and with barely functional TV.  just walking around and try to find things to do. reading was an adventure, even of old crappy books. putting leafs of a tree in a jar of water, too se for how long it will stay green, was a scientific experiment. working in garden was a lot of fun. never thought about my body or grinding work because I will not be able to afford food next month. 

tried to start my scooter, i think the battery is dead.

is money all that matters in this world? maybe i was wrong and all i need to do all along is just to spend all my time and thoughts trying to maximize amount of money i have? is that a good idea? nobody values fucking knowledge or care, or teachers and nurses will be the most valuable people.

***

Silence, no, wind and cars driving through the streets and alarms of the ambulances, this is my silence. your friend became a journalist and covers what is going on in the world outside, meanwhile me covering bullshit that happens in my brain, that no one cares about.

we track ppl across the web, on every website that you going, why not track ppl on a streets then? imagine you can open map and see where each individual person is, ohhh if you can see what they are doing it’s even better. oh well dreams. i wonder how easy right now to track ppl down, now it’s sounds like regular journalism. making same things in different categories makes different types of work.

i guess when ppl write essays about something they dig deep into one thing, like saying everything you can say about fallen leaf. should i do that? it’s sounds kinda a bit more boring then just went out about life. i would never read about other person life, usually it so boring, why do that if we have fiction. talking about the devil, i think i unable to write anything coherent about imaginary people interacting, i guess everything comes with experience, but i don’t really feel like doing that. what i feel like doing is to describe world around me with excessive details. so where do i start? 

comparing urself to others? only yourself

i totally forgot about TIL, so what do i learn today? huh i actually didn’t learn anything, because i didn’t actually seek it. let’s it to be first lesson for me.

what a day

[bigskydreaming]

Okay, so you know “Justice League meets Batman’s kids, who they’d previously been unaware existed” AUs?

So picture that.....but this time, instead of them just having no knowledge of any of these other Gotham vigilantes at all....the Batkids all migrate to various cities as they get older and become known as their protectors - Dick in Bludhaven, Tim in San Francisco, Cass in Hong Kong, etc....

Meaning they’re all established figures, the Justice League are aware of them as solo local heroes who stick to their cities and so they just don’t interact with them much if at all, or else some are members of team lineups but are particularly vague about their histories or life outside of the team’s adventures....

So the big reveal isn’t that they become aware of all these other Gotham vigilantes all at once....its that some big conflict or whatever requires a huge team up of all available heroes, and in the aftermath, they figure out that like.....despite being known as solo heroes who work alone or loners outside of their team settings, 80% of these heroes all not only seem to already know each other, they seem to be related.

And so naturally they all turn to Batman, who has profiles on every known hero and they thus figure had researched these individuals too and just never mentioned this little detail, and they’re like, “Did you know about this?”

And then Nightwing turns to him too, arms crossed and is like, “Yeah Dad, did you know about this?”

And the infamous Red Hood is all: “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I have never met any of these people before in my life. Lives? Whatever.”

And then Red Robin moodily grates out “I have no siblings.” Since he’s nursing a grudge since Dick and Jason broke into his apartment the night before and replaced all his custom Red Robin gear with Darkwing Duck merchandise and his vengeance will be swift and also totally disproportionate because things escalate quickly in this family, that’s true in every universe.

Cass meanwhile has deftly skewered Jason’s lie by walking over to him and brazenly patting down the man with many many guns with no fear whatsoever. He squawks and futilely attempts to bat her hands away as she riffles through his many pockets, but he doesn’t seem shocked, just annoyed. Eventually, she pulls away and triumphantly reveals a box of Hello Kitty themed band-aids.

“So these are yours then? Just for you?” Black Bat asks smugly. Red Hood squints at the box.

“What the fuck? How long have those been in my jacket? Why are those in my jacket? Did you freaking plant them in my jacket just on the offchance you could at some point in the distant future use them at my expense?”

Black Bat frowns, puzzled. “Yes?”

“Oh come on, Dead Hood,” Spoiler says with an exaggerated toss of her head meant to convey she’s rolling her eyes beneath her own mask. She skips her way across the room to Black Bat and then drapes herself languidly all over the smaller woman. Who in turn doesn’t so much as twitch beneath the sudden added mass as Spoiler holds out her hand towards the box of band-aids. 

“One please. I have a boo-boo,” she says with easy familiarity straight into the intimidating cowl of Black Bat. Only then does she deign to finish her train of thought with Red Hood.

“I mean seriously, are you saying you don’t have potential blackmail set-ups, pre-rigged releases of incriminating material, and a random assortment of traps, pratfalls and mortifying scenarios in place for the express purpose of being able to humiliate any and all of your siblings at any given moment, without any need for additional prep time?”

“Is this true, Little Wing?” Nightwing whirls on the larger Red Hood with a faux-scandalized gasp. The founder and leader of the Titans, formerly the Teen Titans, renowned for his stratagems and calm competence when directing squads of supers in the heat of battle while he keeps pace with nothing more than naturally acquired acrobatics and a utility belt that apparently uses the same technology as Wonder Woman’s invisible jet....now appears to be....staggering with the back of his hand pressed to his forehead, moaning about how he felt....faint? 

What is happening right now, several dozen superheroes want to know. Is this a drill? Are they supposed to be checking for signs of a mental ambush from undetected psychic saboteurs? Did they all hit their heads at the exact same time and are now experiencing some kind of shared mass concussion?

Look, that wouldn’t be the weirdest thing to ever happen on the Watchtower. 

“Have I failed you so utterly?” The veteran child hero bemoans with a dramatic twirl - that when contrasted with his stern demeanor of a mere ten minutes ago - makes the fears of telepathic infiltration seem less paranoia and more....concerningly probable. “Did you learn nothing from me? Did you learn nothing from B?”

He stops and jabs a finger up at the sky. “Quick, everyone! What is the very first rule of Living While Batty?”

As if by rote, over a half a dozen voices chime in from all over the room, causing various heroes to jump. Spooked by yet more and more vigilantes joining in some kind of mass recitation like they and they alone have some kind of clue what the hell is going on and everyone else just hadn’t been invited to the party. Which is just rude, honestly. Nobody likes feeling like they weren’t invited to the party. Not even superheroes. 

“If you’re not going to bother preparing for every possible contingency and at least six impossible ones, you might as well just stay in bed.”

Even the Red Hood joins in the Illuminati chant or Cub Scout pledge or demonic ritual or whatever the fuck that just was, though his slumped and exasperated posture gives away every hint of sulkiness his headgear otherwise would have kept safely hidden. He’s surprisingly more...expressive, than most who’d only known of him by reputation had expected him to be. The day continues to yield surprises.

“Of fucking course I do,” he growls out, snatching the box from Black Bat. She doesn’t even fight to hold onto it, just lets it go with a knowing smirk. “I wasn’t surprised by the idea of it, I was just surprised she bothered with such a weak effort. Like yeah whatever, actually those could be mine. I use those all the time at home. So what?”

He aggressively yanks one of the band-aids out of the box, fumbles with the peel-off strips with one hand and he roughly rolls up the sleeve of his jacket with the other. Then just slaps it on his forearm and raises said appendage high, showing it off this way and that. “See?”

“Oh yeah, for sure,” Signal drawls from the other side of the room, nodding his head approvingly. “Totally convincing. Nice job walking that one back, you really showed them.”

Red Hood’s head snaps in his direction with ominous intent. “Watch it, Day-Glo.”

Signal just snorts.

“Yeah, like I’m gonna take constructive criticism on my name and costume from a dude who’s spent the last several years calling himself Red HOOD while running around in a freaking HELMET.”

“Its not meant to be literal, you fucking pedant.”

“So wait, its not literally a helmet? Huh, does it at least protect your head literally, or just like...symbolically? Like if Bane were to clock you across the head, would your concussion just be a metaphor? What’s the treatment protocol for a metaphorical concussion? Fluids, bedrest and a philosophical prescription of two chapters of Chicken Soup for the Soul as needed?”

“Laugh it up, KC and the Sunshine Band,” Red Hood bats back. “You just got yourself disinvited from Thursday night’s poker game.”

Signal just grins and folds his arms over his chest cockily. “Please. You’ve been looking for an excuse to ban me for weeks, cuz you know until you can prove I’m using my ghost vision to cheat, you can’t actually bring suit against me for it in Family Court.”

“That, and also Family Court isn’t a real thing, you toddler. Stop validating Wing-a-ding-ding’s obsession with Shitty TV Nostalgia and just call it that thing where Oracle traps us all in a room until we settle our latest fight without anyone getting stabbed.”

“Yeah, but like, say that five times fast,” Spoiler pipes up. “Its just not practical. Family Court’s way easier.”

“Says the one who’s not even in our fucking family.”

“And yet I grace you all with my sublime presence anyway,” she blows a kiss at him, beatifically unbothered. “You’re welcome.”

The Red Hood scoffs and rounds on his heel, zeroing in on Batwoman in the far corner.

“Hey Auntie B, my siblings are all dead to me and I just helped stop an alien invasion so I deserve nice things like a fun Saturday night. Can you get me into Dad’s fundraiser so I can crash it? He won’t put me back on the list until I promise not to bring any C-4 with me and I won’t promise not to bring any C-4 because he should just trust me that I won’t when I say I’m not gonna and he won’t trust me that I won’t until I admit I shouldn’t have brought any to that sting last month where three tiny little yachts blew up through barely any fault of my own, and I’m just not gonna do that ever because I have convictions and I feel I shouldn’t have to be punished for that. Y’know?”

Batwoman blinks at him. “Kid, I’m not gonna lie to you. You’re my nephew and I love you, but I stopped listening three seconds into all that.”

“Ugh, fine. Can you help me crash Dad’s event tonight so I can teach him a lesson about why he should just trust me not to make a scene so I don’t have to always make a scene to make a point.”

“Tempting as you make that sound,” she says wryly, “I have a strict policy for dealing with you lot and your......everything. I only worry about tolerating one of you at a time, and there’s seven of you, and seven days in the week. You each get your own. You know perfectly well its Robin’s day today. You get me on Tuesday, just like always.”

“Auntie B, we’re not like other families, are we?” Red Robin’s delivery is sarcastically childish and his question clearly rhetorical. Most of his attention is fixated on whatever it is he’s doing with his wrist-mounted computer. 

“No sweetie, we’re all severely fucked in the head and a little bit too comfortable with that.”

“Just checking. Oh hey, Hood, I just emailed you a patch for the hole in your firewall I exploited when replacing all my shit using your accounts just now.”

“You did what?”

“Used your accounts to pay to replace all my stuff that you fucked with last night?” Red Robin says slowly. “Did you not realize that I’ve been sticking within ten feet of you for the past five minutes just so I could clone your devices and do all that while BB and Spoiler kept you distracted? I gotta say, bro, I feel like that’s on you then.”

Red Hood swivels his helmeted head in the direction of the aforementioned two. Black Bat waves. Spoiler shoots him an utterly unrepentant thumbs up.

“You’d side with your ex over me? That’s what its come to?”

“My only allegiance is to chaos,” Spoiler says brightly. Black Bat shrugs.

“Plus he bribes better.”

“Hateful,” Red Hood points at Black Bat, moving on to level the same finger at Spoiler, who curtsies in acknowledgment: “Hateful-er.”

Then the finger rounds the bases to aim judgmentally at Red Robin. “Hateful-est. And that was all Nightwing’s idea anyway, not mine.”

“Oh, I assumed as much,” he says casually. “Your idea of a prank tends to have more of a Carrie vibe. Or be a literal literary reenactment.”

“Its called an homage, 4chan.”

“Whatever, plagiarist. And anyway, I couldn’t go after ‘Wing for payback on this one. He used an Immunity card. If you didn’t want me getting back at you, you should have used one too."

Red Hood looms aggressively. Red Robin ignores willfully. Round and round they go. Superheroes who can survive excessive G-Forces are getting dizzy just watching them have a largely motionless stand-off. That shouldn’t be how that works, but whatever. All the most infamously reclusive and isolated heroes in all hero-dom are apparently part of the same one big reclusive and isolated family of fucked up weirdos and they’re all officially bonkers. Nothing makes sense anymore. Reality broke. Try another stall.

“Okay, but see, in order to have an Immunity card, I would have to participate in one of you losers’ stupid Immunity challenges,” the Red Hood drags out with exaggerated patience. “And I’m just not going to do that, on account of those all being fucking stupid. You see the problem there?”

Red Robin just shrugs. “I don’t know what to tell you, bro. You can have principles or you can have an Immunity card. You can’t have both.”

Meanwhile, on another side of....the same room.....look, its like, an octagonal room, probably. It has a lot of sides. Robin fends off questions from an aggrieved looking Superboy.

“You never told me you had a bajillion brothers and sisters!”

“Yes but I never said I didn’t either.”

Superboy rolls his eyes. “Oh yeah, so I should just assume everyone I meet has a bajillion secret brothers and sisters?”

“Well clearly it would have worked out in your favor in this instance if you had, now wouldn’t it?”

“Assuming of course that you can trust what has been said or implied here today and I am actually related to any of those numbskulls. Which I am not actually admitting to,” Robin tacks on hastily.

Superboy eyes him dubiously. “You joined in the same creepy chant all the others did and then got super self-conscious and looked around to see if anyone had noticed. Which uh. I did.”

“First off, your interpretation of body language is abyssmal. I do not get self-conscious,” Robin says with a delivery that probably could have benefited from being a little less self-conscious. “And second....that proves nothing. I guessed what they were going to say.”

“Word for word,” Superboy says super-skeptically.

“I’m very good at guessing things. You know this.”

“Okay. Guess how much I believe you right now then.”

Robin glares and folds his arms grumpily across his chest. 

“And what was that anyway? Was that like....you guys’ family motto or something like that?”

“Oh no,” Spoiler pipes up. “That’s much shorter.”

Superboy balks at that. “Wait, you guys actually have one of those for real?”

“Yup,” Steph says, counting out the words with her fingers. “He who laughs last....probably works for the Joker. So tranq him just to be safe. See? Only sixteen words. The first rule of Living While Batty is way longer, and what we said was just the abridged version. You should hear the original, before Black Bat put her foot down and refused to memorize it unless sizable edits were made.”

Superboy hovers between her and Robin now, both in mid-air and on the verge of taking Spoiler’s words as an invitation to hear just that. A low growl arises from Robin’s direction.

“Must you?” He asks the older vigilante, with a most put upon expression.

She looks at him pityingly. “Do you actually need me to answer that? Like, we’ve met, right? Hi, I’m Spoiler.”

“Wait, so Robin said that I just never specifically asked him if he had a bajillion brothers and sisters, and that’s why he didn’t tell me, so that means he wouldn’t have just lied and there’s not some code of secrecy that flat out forbids telling other people stuff, right?” Superboy realizes excitedly.

“Yes, excellent direction. Go on,” Spoiler says, steepling her fingers. Robin buries his face in the palm of one hand.

“Soooo, what other stuff could you tell me about Robin’s super top secret family that I wouldn’t think to ask about but that he would tell me about if I knew what questions to ask?”

She claps once, lightly but with emphasis. “Well done. You’ve passed the first barrier. Untold secrets await you behind just a few more.”

“I’ll get you for this,” Robin vows calmly. She waves a hand at him.

“Yeah, yeah. Just make sure you do it before January 1st, remember? You’ve promised retribution like ten times already this year and those don’t roll over, y’know. Rules are rules.”

“Enough!” Thunders a voice then, from the front of the room. Well one of the fronts anyway. Like sides, it has a lot of them, but this is the one where Batman’s standing. All eyes snap to him. Which is kinda just what eyes do when Batman says stuff like that. Its like his superpower, except he doesn’t actually have superpowers, which is what makes it scary. But where the snapping of the eyes (directional) is usually followed by Batman saying something else besides just “hey look at me,” here he pauses in the wake of his own call to attention’s waning reverberations. Uncharacteristically silent.

Not that, y’know, he’s normally Mr. Talkity Talk, but usually his silences feel like he has the words to fill them, he’s just withholding them. This though, this feels more like he doesn’t have any words at all. And he’s as confused by it as any of them, and most everyone else is confused by Batman being confused, and its this whole trickle down economy of confusion and its wrecking havoc on the value of the golden silence standard.

Of course, not everyone present is rendered spellbound with confusion.

“C’mon B,” Nightwing cajoles, leaning forward and practically radiating delight. “I think you know what you have to do now. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Its not likely to come around again.”

Red Hood snickers beneath his helmet and chimes in. “Yeah Pops, go ahead. You do this and you’ll actually have my respect for a whole twenty four hours. No, wait. Sixteen. No! Eight. Yeah, eight. Still a good deal.”

“Carpe diem, B,” Red Robin grins, leaning back as if to enjoy the show.

“Hey! Infringe on my trademark one more time, dude,” Signal throws a faux-glare at the former. Red Robin just quirks an eyebrow.

“And what, you’ll start saying Yum every time you eat a burger? Oh no. I’m hoist by my own petard.”

Signal flips him off with a grin and then redirects his attention back to Batman. “Yeah seriously though B, you kinda gotta do it now. Because if you don’t do it, then you’ll forever be the guy who didn’t do it, and you don’t want to be that guy, do you?”

“Yeah you really don’t want to be that guy,” Spoiler shouts out. “Nobody likes that guy. He’s the worst.”

“Do it, do it,” Black Bat starts chanting beside her, steadily picking up speed and volume. Several others start joining in. Even Robin appears to be slightly anticipatory, albeit trying very hard to hide it.

Batman sighs, and somehow everyone manages to hear it. Stills. Waits for....something? Nobody but them seems to have any clue what, but the air is thick and heavy with portentiousness. Something is about to happen, and all most of the heroes present could say for sure is it was something they never would have in a million years seen coming.

Finally, Batman straightens with the resigned air of a man about to have oh so many regrets. He crosses his arms, shakes his head, and in an absolute deadpan monotone, says:

“You are awful children. You know you’re killing me. You’re killing your father.”

[tinyjeanmarco]

zeke relationship hc’s!

note: this was just going to be zeke as your husband, but it turned into outright zeke relationship hc’s! modern setting! hope you all enjoy! <3

zeke x gn!reader

warnings: none <3

you wouldn’t believe it, but.. zeke hit on you when you were out at the pool with friends on a hot summer day.

listen, he just thought you looked really hot and he didn’t wanna let someone so stunning slip away so easily.

he was so smooth about it too, he would come up to you, water droplets hanging off his golden, glowing skin, and hand you an ice cold lemonade.

you were really taken aback, unsure if you should trust a random bearded man at the pool who was hitting on you.

your friends were egging you on, saying it had been a while since you dated after your last ex, so give it a go.

agreeing, thinking it was time to finally let go, you asked him for his name and began flirting right back with him.

you two spent the rest of the time at the pool together.

your friends didn’t mind if you spent the day with him, thinking it was funny and also very good for you.

for some reason, it was. you had never met this man before, but suddenly  you just felt comfortable with him.

he asked you for your number after you began to feel tired, stating you were going to go. you gave it to him, not reluctant at all.

he asked you out after you exchanged numbers and you had nodded. he said he would text you the deets and gave a wink before turning to also pack his stuff and leave.

you joined back up with your besties, telling them all about him. they were pretty hyped about the whole situation, saying they would help you get ready for your date whenever it was.

you steadily spent more time with him after that date. that date being a trip to an arcade together. it was a really fun first date and you got to know him a lot better.

moving in with him was fun, moving the boxes in became sort of a game of who could carry the most boxes into the apartment. not necessarily at the same time, but overall. 

he unfortunately won that little game, boosting his ego more than you needed.

now, when he proposed to you, he was a mess of nerves, definitely not his regular confident self, which that in itself tipped you off that something was going on.

he took you on a date to the arcade you went to on your first date when he proposed. it was honestly really sweet, he made sure it was at a place with special meaning for you two.

zeke 10/10 ugly cried at your wedding. he just thought you looked absolutely stunning, he couldn’t help it.

he also probably got totally wasted at your wedding too which gave you tons of funny memories. 

you def whipped out your phone and recorded him being silly as well as taking fun pics with him.

the type to wake up before you and make you breakfast in his underwear.

he likes to bring you breakfast in bed whenever he can. 

wakes you up with soft forehead kisses, brushing his thumbs over your cheeks.

sometimes when he wakes up, he just decides to lay with you, watching how peaceful and comfortable you look.

you eventually wake up and catch him just looking at you, so you roll over onto him, just kinda plopping onto him.

he gives a hearty laugh and just wraps his arms around you whenever you do that, making sure you stay close to him and can’t get up. he wants to bask in the warm sunlight leaking in through the window.

don’t ask why, but when you run your fingers through his hair and scratch his scalp, he becomes a puddle of goo. (maybe it’s the monke genes)

if he were a cat, he would purr whenever you did that.

loves holding you in his arms on the balcony of your apartment, just enjoying the fresh air and sunlight.

he’s only allowed to smoke outside, cause we all know this man smokes too much.

you try to get him to stop as much as you can. he does try, but it’s really hard because it’s a stress reliever whenever he is overworked.

you haven’t been able to get him to stop completely but he definitely has cut down on how much he smokes since you’ve gotten together. just one step at a time.

although he is a smoker, i feel like he would have a really nice singing voice. he sings you to sleep sometimes. it’s just really melodic and gentle. 

that’s honestly another reason you try to get him to stop smoking, because it could harm his vocals really bad and then he wouldn’t be able to sing as well as he does now.

you love hearing him hum or sing along to music as he cooks for you.

sometimes you join in and sing duets together, whether you think you’re good or not, he loves your voice when you sing with him. really makes his day when you join in for the chorus!

a married, grown man, but still a literal child. takes you out on a sushi date and then takes you to a railroad track so you can run around being idiots, just talking.

likes to have deep, meaningful chats with you when you’re walking on the train tracks.

don’t worry, you guys are always safe when you visit them, he wouldn’t ever let anything happen to you or even put you in a dangerous situation if he can help it.

please, i see him as being really good at roller skating. he wants to teach you because it’s something he really enjoys. he will not let you do anything related to skating without elbow pads, knee pads, wrist guards, and a helmet.

buys you fun skates that match his.

also, he wont let you skate without safety gear but he’s out here wearing only wrist guards. mister “i’ve been skating for years” is a hypocrite.

to be fair, he doesn’t fall a whole lot.

you get nervous skating at first so he takes you to empty parking lots to teach you before moving on to skate parks.

ngl i forgot indoor skating was a thing so i didn’t mention it, but he would also take you to those places! would make sure you have your indoor wheels on when you go though.

he doesn’t want you to fall because you have your gummy wheels on, or get in trouble for using the wrong wheels.

you’re really good at it before you even notice because you have such a great teacher.

i see zeke also being the husband that wants to travel a lot. you would go to so many places and experience lots of things.

ziplining, sky diving, bungee jumping, cliff diving. all the things.

he loves going cliff diving a lot though, will yell super loud as he jumps into the water.

you’re scared the first time he takes you, never having done daring things like that before. he tells you that there is no pressure and if you want to go back to the cabin, that’s totally okay too.

you tell him with a trembling confident voice that you’re going to do it. he goes first so he can be ready to comfort you after you jump.

you actually had a ton of fun, the adrenaline pumping through you as you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him into a bruising kiss.

laughter surrounds you two as you get lost in one another.

hiking and canoeing are also something he really enjoys with you.

he tells you all the time how he wants to get a cat or dog so you guys can be like those instagram pages where people take their pets with them on adventures.

zeke also seems like someone who would like to go cold plunging! he likes the health benefits that come with it, as well as connecting with strangers.

now, one final thought since we are on adventure zeke who loves taking care of his mental and physical health, man loves to meditate.

he will make you meditate with him and practice mindfulness and breathing techniques.

10/10, zeke is good hubby and partner in life. he loves going on adventures with you and spending time with you. ♡

[dizzydennis]

Sonic x Cream & Cheese Cover Story - English Translation

Translator note: I am not fluent in Japanese. I did my best to bring these translations for Sonic fans to enjoy. Constructive criticism is absolutely welcomed, but please be kind. I hope you enjoy this sweet little story!

It’s the popping and colorful, “Music Plant.”

Tubes of brass instruments weave and wind around the bouncing path of a piano keyboard. This area is entertaining to anybody who listens to  the music within it and it’s become somewhat of a famous attraction for some animals.

In such a cheerful place like the Music Plant, you can see two energetic shadows chasing after something. The blue hedgehog, "Sonic" was ahead of the other two with a large gap between them.

Just behind was the little rabbit girl, "Cream" and her chao friend, "Cheese.” Due to the Music Plant being full of various musical instruments and gadgets, even if they thought they had caught up, they'd be pulled elsewhere soon again. The race between these characters allowed the scales of music to play beautifully like a duet.

Looking back, Sonic couldn't see Cream. Sonic tried slowing to walk to assess the situation, but... Cream then came down softly from the sky and blocked his way.

“Mr. Sonic! Please let us go on an adventure together!”

Cream can fly through the sky by flopping her big ears. She could never beat Sonic in terms of foot speed, but she was always able to catch up with some clever shortcuts. Sonic smiled and sighed.

“Like I said, ‘that’s no good!’ The place I’m heading towards is pretty dangerous.”

Sonic carefully chose his words. As he continued on forward he gave a wink to express an all-too-simple: “I’m sorry.”

Sonic then slipped and said “...for a kid.”

Upon hearing this, Cream puffed out her cheeks in frustration and clenched her fists.

“Urgh, Mr. Sonic! Don’t treat me like a little kid! Hmph!”

“It’s not like that, Cream! It’s not that at all. It’s just a bit...”

-ZUUUUUUUUUN-

Just as Sonic tried to find the right words, a terrifying rumbling sound was heard from a distance that shook the Earth. Sonic gave a serious look. Apparently he had a bit of an idea of what that sound was.

“I gotta go fast! Cream, you get home safely, OK?”

“Ah, Mr. Sonic! Please wait!”

Sonic, who flew off at full speed this time, disappeared from Cream’s view as he ran towards the horizon.

For a few seconds, Cream stared at where Sonic had ran with a frazzled expression, but she soon got blown forward... or rather, she started walking again with a much more excited expression.

“Teehee, we should probably go check out that loud noise. It’ll surely shock Mr. Sonic!”

“Chao, chao?”

Cheese seemed to be questioning why Cream wants to keep up with Sonic so badly.

“Is it alright, Cheese? Wherever Sonic goes, there’s bound to be lots of fun adventures! Of course, there are times when our adventures get tough, but Sonic is strong, kind, and knows all about how to adventure. Everything will be just fine!”

“Chao! Chao, chao!”

Cheese seemed to agree and the two went off!

-BANG!!!-

The air shook from far away, and suddenly a loud roar broke through the air. A very large clump of iron flew towards them while it emitted a thick black smoke. It quickly slammed downwards.

CRASH! CRASH! The keyboard bridge and instruments around it were totaled and collapsed.

“Th-Thi- This is bad!”

It must have come from that dangerous place Sonic mentioned just before. Cream, who had fallen over due to the first impact had gotten up in the chaos of everything and saw the miserable, destroyed surroundings. She tried to dust herself off.

Crumbling bridges, animals fleeing for their lives... is this what constitutes as an adventure?

Meanwhile... on the other side of the Music Plant.

“You wanna play me a number? Heh, this is just a robot from Eggman’s Incredible Interstellar Amusement Park; I guess he won’t play.”

A mass-produced Death Egg Robot about the size of a small mountain had stopped moving and was leaning against a trumpet-like facility. It stopped with black smoke shooting out all over the place.

Through it all, Sonic was making a fool of himself while gleefully playing the trumpets.

The truth is, Sonic came here to take down this mass-produced Death Egg Robot when he had heard it was attacking here. The owner, Dr. Eggman, was nowhere to be seen as this seemed to be a “stray robot” that rampaged at complete random. Even so, it was still strong and dangerous. Sonic had to be careful getting Cream involved.

The robot was defeated without much trouble. Sonic was in a good mood because he had made sure the collateral damage was minimal. With this, fixing things back to normal would be fairly easy. The beautiful scenery of the Music Plant and the beautiful sounds that people loved would soon be restored.

Suddenly...

Sonic noticed black smoke rising from the overpass which was only a short distance away. It seemed like the last explosion from the destroyed Death Egg Robot may have caused a huge clump of debris to fly off. It must have flown far and struck that bridge.

“Oh no!”

There were probably many tourists there and Sonic felt it was the exact area where he split up from Cream. He ran with all of his might and had an absolutely serious look on his face.

Sonic traveled at the speed of sound as he overcame colorful hills, spin dashed through a tunnel of brass instruments, and more to arrive at the scene.

A group of animals seemed to be relaxing after having safely evacuated the dangerous bridge area. Cream and Cheese flew down as she flapped her ears.

“Cream!”

“Mr. Sonic!?”

Cream made an expression that shined brightly as she flew to Sonic. But in the shadows of her shining smile, she was tired... but still happy. She went to rescue the many animals and others who were too slow and left behind on the bridge. She took care of the children who had been separated from their parents.

Sonic talked for a while and noticed that Cream was safe, the damage to the surroundings was not as catastrophic as it first seemed, and there were no major injuries. Cream felt relieved and put her hand to her chest. However, Cream’s expression seemed off.

She then said, “I’m so glad that everybody is safe.”

Cream looked downward and continued to speak in a sweet voice.

“I really wanted to defeat that bad robot and go on an adventure with Sonic.”

Just then, Cream stomped on some pebbles at her feet and turned away from Sonic. She continued to look down at the ground. Sonic spoke softly to Cream with a gentle smile.

“That’s not it at all, Cream.”

Sonic stroke the back of Cream’s head and she slowly looked up. Sonic then took to one knee to be at Cream’s eye level.

“An adventure like today... well, it requires both ‘strength’ and ‘kindness.’ We gotta make sure we have both of them.”

“...?”

“Today, you helped me out entirely with your kindness. It was honestly a huge help if I do say so myself!”

“!?”

“Sure! I defeated the robot that was attacking the Music Plant, but half of this adventure was entirely you, Cream!”

“!!”

Like a soft breeze floating by, Cream’s heart shined.

There are times when things get really tough, but if you have strength and kindness, it will be okay. Isn't that the ideal form of an "adventure" for Cream? Today she had an adventure with Sonic!

For Cream, today’s excitement, her hard work, and the way things turned out are all a shining part of her adventures.

Happiness and pride filled Cream’s heart.

“I... really had an adventure?”

“Yeah!”

“I really used my kindness well?”

“Sure!”

“So... will you... take me on more adventures?”

Of course! Sonic gave a thumbs up as a promise, but as the sun started setting, he thought for a moment and answered:

“That’s fine by me, but... it’s getting late. Isn’t it time to go home? Your Mom must be worried. So, how’s tomorrow sound?”

“Hmph! Please don’t treat me like a kid again.”

Sonic ran off with an expression that showed he knew he hit a nerve. Cream and Cheese gave chase.

Music scales filled the air as they ran through the Music Plant; their performance echoing through the sky.

[intergalacticwanderer]

(Part one, part two. This fic is pretty much a mash up of this post about tiefling virtue names and this post about Molly’s tattoos, because apparently I couldn’t stop thinking about it even after making them. Some small references are made to the prior fics but all that’s really needed is that Kingsley recently got all of Molly’s memories and is dealing with that.)

The weather and the seas that day were remarkably calm - not that good for sailing, but good for tasks that required steadier footing or hands. And if the doldrums did stay longer than was welcome, Fjord and Jester both had some tricks to get them out of it, so, nothing to really worry about. There were plenty of things he could do on a day like today.

In that moment he was in Jester’s cabin, sitting on a cushion beside her bed, while she sat on the bed above him and carded her fingers through his hair.

“So what do you want to do this time? Something fancy? Ohh, maybe adventurous? Beau’s here, maybe we could try shaving it!”

Kingsley chuckled, relaxing back into the touch as she gathered up the hair. “Just the usual trim for now. We’ll see about the rest once that's done.”

“Hmm, if you say so,” Jester said, bringing out her small pair of shears and starting on the bottom of the hair while her tail idly brushed against his own. “I do think you’d look really cool with shaved sides though.”

He gave a little hum, letting his tail wrap around hers. “Probably. But trim first.”

“Okaaaaay,” Jester said, mock exasperated, but he could hear the smile in her voice. Soon enough she settled into her rhythm, pulling up individual sections of hair and the quiet snip of the shears the only sound for a moment.

The first time Jester had trimmed his hair had been, while not a disaster, not the best either. At the time however he’d been too aggravated by his long hair to really care, and soon enough it’d become a regular thing, Jester improving with the additional practice. In the grand scheme of things a haircut might not be a huge deal, but at the same time? That first haircut in Nicodranas had been one of the first times he’d really been able to really take control of his own appearance, feel comfortable in how he looked, and he was forever grateful to Jester for helping him continue that. Plus, it was a great way for them to have some time to gossip. Speaking of which...

“So I heard something from Beau the other day.”

“Ohhh? What kind of thing?” He felt her lean forward a little, tail coming free from his to swing back and forth.

“Well, one thing, she told me to ask about a story, but I'm not doing that part yet.”

“Aww! Why not?”

“Cause I don't want to get accidentally stabbed if I laugh at the wrong time.” As if to emphasize his point he felt the shears trimming some hair closer to his ear. “Besides, I can ask about it afterwards, something to look forward to.”

“But you could still do nowww,” Jester said, and even without seeing her face he could hear her pouting.

“It’s not you, it’s me,” he said dramatically and he was rewarded with a giggle.

“Okay, fine. What’s the other part?”

“She was talking about members of the Nein having different names, besides me?” He stretched out his arms in front of him and bowed his back a little before relaxing again, making sure not to move his head while he did it. “I know about Nott and Veth, and there were those sketchy assassin wizard people calling Caleb Bren when all that went down, but she also mentioned you? Said I should ask you about it.” He did his best to seem blasé but his tail betrayed him, curling and thrashing along the floor. He reached over and stilled it with his hand, hoping she hadn’t noticed.

“Oh!” Her voice was surprised, and the shears stopped for a moment. “Did she. Um. Say what it was?”

Kingsley almost shook his head but stopped himself in time. “Nah. Probably figured it wasn’t her place to share, and I’d agree. Won’t say I’m not curious but up to you.”

Understatement. Painful understatement. But he wasn’t going to force it either, no matter how much he wanted to know. It was less about the name itself and more just... the confirmation that she’d had a different name at some point. Something that could maybe help him feel a little less alone with the tangled mess of two names bouncing around in his head these past couple days.

The sound of the shears started back up again. “... Genevieve. But my name is Jester.”

“Never said it wasn’t dear,” Kingsley said, feeling himself relax. “What made you want to change it?”

There was another pause, longer than he expected. “... do you not know about virtue names? Wait, what am I saying?” He felt Jester shift on the bed and a few moments later she was climbing down onto the floor and sitting in front him, hands settling into her lap. “I forget sometimes that you don’t know about certain tiefling stuff.”

Kingsley blinked a few times at the sudden change in set up. “And?”

“So I guess it’s my job to teach you!”

“Am I still getting the rest of my haircut?” He held up a lock of untrimmed hair.

She swatted his arm. “Yes! But this is important enough that I want to talk to you about it face to face.”

Jester shifted to make herself comfortable then clapped her hands together in front of her. “So! What I know about this I learned from my mama, so I don't know everything but what I do know is preeetty cool. The easy version is that virtue names are naming yourself what you want to be!”

Kingsley raised an eyebrow. “That’s it?”

That earned him another swat on the arm. “There’s more to it than that, silly! Or...” She paused, then shrugged. “Actually, that is pretty much it, but that doesn’t mean it’s not important.”

“See, a virtue name isn’t just what you want to be, it’s thinking about who you are. What you want to strive for, what’s important to you, who you are as a person.” Jester placed a hand on her chest. “For me, Jester was something I thought sounded cool, and I liked that they made other people laugh. And, okay, maybe those reasons are a little simple, but it’s still me, and because it’s me it’s important.”

Kingsley thought over what she’d said. “I... take it Marion isn’t a virtue name?”

Jester shook her head. “Nope, my mama liked the name she had. But she still told me I could choose whatever name I wanted, you know? Even if she didn’t change it herself she wanted me to have that choice. And I did, and I’m happy being Jester.”

“Anyway, that’s tiefling virtue names!” She straightened, about to stand back up when she stopped, something seeming to occur to her. “Wait.” And then Jester pointed at him, face brightening. “Kingsley’s kind of like a virtue name!”

His current confused mess about names did a weird flip in his stomach. “Uh-?”

“You mentioned feeling kingly, and you even have your goal of maybe becoming the Plank King someday! That's so cool!” Jester grinned at him, hands clasped together, but a few moments later her smile fell away. “... Kingsley?”

Even with being addressed directly Kingsley glanced behind him (which, of course, was just the bed), wondering what suddenly had her looking so worried. Was something on his face?

“I’m fine,” he said, maybe a little too quickly. It was when he looked to the side that he caught the culprit - his godsdamned tail again. His hand snapped out, stilling it, but he knew that this time she'd definitely seen it. His heart hammered in his chest.

“Kingsley.” Her voice had softened. “What’s wrong?”

For a split second he considered lying, but the thought died quickly. Jester had already caught him, and... yeah, he didn't like lying to her. Not about important stuff at least. He took a deep breath and exhaled.

“I... I think the name talk might be wigging me out a little.” And he’d even been the one to bring it up in the first place.

“Do you want to talk about something else?”

Kingsley shook his head. “Nah, it’s just- Beau told me about the others changing their names, probably to try and make me feel better?” He ran a hand through his partially trimmed hair, while the thumb on his other hand worried at his nails. “And it helped but right now all I can think about is how I'm different. Caleb was a random alias that stuck, Veth was stuck in a different body, and you-” He gestured at her- “got a chance to really think about what you wanted. And all of you were still, well- you.”

Kingsley let out a sigh, hands dropping into his lap. “It’s... dumb but, I almost feel weirdly guilty about my name right now? I like it but I picked it when I didn’t remember and-”

“Kingsley no.” She reached forward and grabbed his hand with both of hers. “Don't ever feel guilty about that, okay?”

Kingsley jumped a little, surprised at her intensity. “I- okay?”

“You said you like your name, right?” Jester squeezed his hand.

A small pause. “Yes?”

“And you still believe in the reasons you picked your name?”

“...yyyes?”

“Then it's your name.” She held his gaze. “You can add to it if you want, but please don’t feel like you have to change it.” Her face softened again and she gave a small smile. “You’re allowed to like your name and who you are. That’s okay.” She patted the back of back of his hand. “And... maybe you can just think of it as your actual virtue name? If you want to. I was allowed to make that choice, and so can you. And you could totally just have two names if you wanted. It's up to you.”

It took several long moments for him just to process. “...Huh.” Thinking about the name Kingsley. Keeping it, but maybe now as a virtue name, a deliberate choice, showing who and what he wanted to be. Knowing he could still keep the other name too if he wanted. “Huh.” He nodded to himself. “Actually... yeah. I like that. I like that a lot. Thank you Jester.”

Jester finally grinned again, giving one more squeeze to his hand and a small nod in return. “Happy to help.”

She clambered back up to her spot on the bed, brushing his hair back to where it’d been before she’d climbed down. “Anything you want to talk about next?”

“I think I’d like to just relax for a bit, if that’s okay.”

“Sounds good to me!” Jester said.

Things settled into a comfortable sort of quiet, Jester humming a small tune and sounds of the ocean filtering in from the outside. That was one experience he'd never gotten to have before, at least, and it'd helped to serve as a good touchstone these past couple days. An easy dividing line for before and after. But in that moment, with the quiet intent work, someone else changing something on his body on his behalf, a new memory ran through his mind - or rather, new to him.

Sitting backwards on a chair, shirt off and resting his arms on the chair back, hair somehow even shorter than it was now. People talking around him, friendly, asking what he wanted and what he had in mind, before a prickling burning pain started on his right shoulder. The pain continuing down his arm, but there was a satisfaction to it, knowing that this scar, this tattoo was his own mark. Laying claim to a body that was unfamiliar and foreign, blotting out an eye that wouldn't stop staring and wouldn't go away.

That pain was distant now, separated not only by time but death and revival as well, but Kingsley still found himself looking down at the snake tattoo wrapping around his arm, the scales bordered and adorned by numerous scars. He hadn't paid much attention to it when he'd first woken up (outside of wondering about questionable decisions) or even really in the immediate time afterwards. Now it was almost like double vision looking at it - a tangible reminder of someone screaming to the world that he was alive, he was here, he existed.

He gave a quiet snort. A reminder of life, but it'd still stuck around when he was very much not alive and buried in the ground. Then again...

A few tufts of hair dropped onto his shoulder and Jester brushed them off for him, continuing to hum as she worked. Sure, he'd been dead and in the ground, but he wasn't anymore. And even when he hadn't remembered different things, the tattoos had still been there. Proof that Molly had existed.

Kingsley held up his right hand in front of him towards the light shining through the open door, examining the blank spot in the snake’s head, before flipping to his palm and looking at the blank spot there as well. He hadn't ever been bothered by those before - in fact, the sight had been a relief. But right now, those voids on his hand, scattered around other various body parts and tattoos... it was making him itch. It wasn’t complete.

“Hey Jester?” He continued to hold his hand in front of him, tail tapping on the floor.

“Hmmm?”

“You still practicing tattoos?”

Jester gave a little gasp. “Oh my gosh YES! I can-”

“Hair!” Kingsley yelled when he felt her start to move off the bed again. “Hair first!”

“Ack, okay, just-” There was a small scramble as she readjusted course, but soon enough she was back in place, Kingsley mercifully un-stabbed by flailing shears. “But you have to tell me what you’re thinking about!”

He laughed. “Okay, okay.”

His tail continued to tap on the floor as he thought, his left hand coming up to his chin. “So, we were just talking about names, right? And how Kingsley can be my virtue name, but I can still keep the other if I want?”

“Yeah?” Jester hadn't started cutting his hair again yet, too caught up in what he was saying.

He held his right hand up into her view, poking at the blank spot on its back. “I want to see if I can do something like that with these? If that makes sense? It sounded better in my head.”

A pause.

“... okay, I’m really sorry, I know you said hair first but I have to come back down there for this,” Jester said and she slid off the bed to plop down next to him, sketchbook somehow already in her hand. “Cause that idea is amazing and we gotta talk about it.”

Kingsley gave the most over the top sigh he could. “I guess I’m going to have half cut hair forever.”

“I know, I’m sorry, but I don’t want you to forget what you’re thinking about!”

He bumped his shoulder into hers, grinning. “Nah, I getcha. Just know it’ll be even longer until I ask about that story,” he said, winking.

This time, he was actually able to see Jester pouting at that.

“Fiiiine. Now tell me about the tattoos!!”

“Alright, alright, I'm getting there,” he said with another laugh, shifting his position to where it was more comfortable to talk.

“Okay, so, I know part of the reason these tattoos are here was to hide the red eyes.” He held up his right hand and wiggled his fingers. “It's great that they're gone but I kinda want to give them just one more f-you by filling them in with my own thing, make it look like it was supposed to be like that all along.”

“Oooo, I like it,” Jester said, starting to sketch out a replica of the snake on his hand and the associated blank spot. “Do you know what you want in there instead?”

“Hmm. Not really? The idea just popped into my head, so-” He gave a shrug. “We know there's nine of them at least.”

“Neeeeein!” Jester’s response was almost entirely out of habit, but a moment later her eyes widened, Kingsley broke out into a grin, and the two of the pointed at each other at the same time.

“Mighty Nein!” It was together but not at all in unison and the two of them dissolved into muffled laughter.

“That sounded terrible! I love it!”

“I knooow!” Jester said and she broke into further giggles. “But that could be it! Something with the Mighty Nein!”

“Picture this,” Kingsley said, gesturing dramatically with his palms facing down. “Instead of the eyes of nine we have... the eyes of NEEEIN!”

“YES!” Jester pumped her arms into the air. “It could even be in everyone’s eye colors! And little hidden designs inside if we want to get fancy!”

“Oh we always want to get fancy,” Kingsley said, showing off a fanged grin. “That settles it! Operation replace eyes of nine with the Mighty Nein is a go!”

“Awesome!!” Jester whipped her sketchbook up in front of her, poised to start drawing. “Let’s start with your Mighty Nein eye!”

Kingsley lifted his hand, ready to throw out ideas - and hesitated.

“... actually, the red might make things a little weird.”

Jester winced. “Ooooh, right. Maybe not.”

“But!” Kingsley said, perking up, “Yasha has two eye colors. So it’d still work either way. I’ll think about it.”

“Yeah!” Jester nodded, some of her enthusiasm returning. “And we can totally figure out some other stuff for now.” She wrote down a few notes in her sketchbook. “Do you know where you’d want people? Like, matching with tattoos, who’s near each other, that sort of thing?”

“I think I’ve got a couple in mind?” He tapped the back of his neck, where he knew the gap in the all seeing eye tattoo was. “Beau’s can go here. Can’t let her get the last word, after all,” he said, grinning, but there was something vulnerable to it.

The first time he had made the connection between Beau’s tattoo and the one on the back of his own neck his feelings had been... mixed. Weirdly flattered, but also feeling like a bit of a cheat, like he was taking credit for something he didn’t deserve. Now, though, he knew that there was no obligation to it. While they’d had their hiccups the Mighty Nein weren’t going to sacrifice him on the pyre of memory, and they loved him for who he was.

Him adding to the tattoo, wrapping it back around to being a tribute to Beau, assigning his own meaning away from hiding the somnovem? Kingsley rubbed the back of his neck, smile now softer. It would be his. Still building off of who he’d been before, that was still part of him, but now it could be his.

“That’s the only one I know for sure, right now. But I’ll keep thinking on the rest.”

Another nod. “Okay! Do you want to get the tattoos as you think of them? Or all at once? And do you want to tell anyone else about it before you do it?”

“All at once, works better to make sure they fit. Plus I don’t want to get accused of playing favorites,” he said with another grin. “As for the other... hmm. Input is nice, but I do like surprising people. I’d say that’s another think about it.”

“Got it!” Jester said, and he saw her starting to sketch the all seeing eye tattoo beside the snake head. “This is going to be amazing.”

“Of course it will, you’re involved.”

Jester ducked down behind the sketchbook a little but she was smiling as well. “If you say sooo.”

“I do. And Jester?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.” He didn’t specify for what this time, but he figured it’d get through. There was still a lot he needed to figure out but now at least he had some new touchstones, the promise of even more in the future, and good company right in that moment. It was more than enough for him to be thankful for.

It did, however, seem like it was going to be awhile until he finished that haircut. But in the mean time...

“... okay, I’m too curious, Beau said I had to ask you about really early Xhorhas disguises?” Kingsley said and he saw Jester's face absolutely light up.

A few minutes later, over in his own cabin, Fjord swore and almost dropped something on his foot at Kingsley’s sudden loud cackling, and he just sighed and shook his head.

(Part Four)

[ladeaeveld]

Notes on Tevinter Nights

I finished reading Tevinter Nights not so long ago, so here is an overview of what is happening in Thedas. There is probably nothing particularly new since I'm a bit late to the party. However, I find such overviews convenient to refresh my memory when needed. Perhaps it will be useful to someone else!

This overview was meant to be short, but there were so many interesting details... now, it is huge.

Also, since I’ve read the translated version, any help with wording clarifications is greatly appreciated!

The post is under a cut due to Tevinter Nights spoilers (and length).

Global events

- There is a war between the Qunari and Tevinter.

- Three branches of the Qun do not agree with each other. The Antaam, the military branch of the Qun, attacked Ventus and continued the invasion without the permission of the other two. It results in faster progress of the invasion as the other two branches were a moderating influence on the Antaam. The Ben-Hassrath holds a neutral position.

- In Tevinter, the Venatori are still a problem.

- Smaller countries like Rivain and Antiva are under serious threat of the Qunari’s invasion.

- The heads of the Antivan Crows, eight Talons, held a meeting to join their forces, protect Antiva, and withstand the Qunari's invasion. The meeting was disrupted, and four out of eight Talons were murdered. New heads of the Crows will be chosen soon.

- The king of Nevarra is on the brink of death. The Mortalitasi, who have always had great power in Nevarra, continue to interfere in politics.

- All the Grey Wardens were summoned to Weisshaupt.

- We were introduced to a considerable amount of characters from the guild of treasure hunters, the Lords of Fortune.

- Regarding the Inquisition, little is known. All external issues of the organization seem to be handled by Varric Tethras. He gives quests, monitors their implementation, hires new people.

- One of the Executors, or ‘those across the sea’, showed up in the flesh. Solas said they are particularly dangerous and cautioned against interacting with them.

- By now, many have heard rumours of the Fen’Harel’s cult.

Minrathous

- A demon or something far worse is imprisoned under Minrathous. With the help of the Venatori, it is now unsealed (will probably be sealed again later). Yet, to awake it, some blood-magic ritual must be performed.

- The creature was sealed with eight blood-bonded enchanted clay disks. They showed a long and thin four-winged dragon rising from the dark waters.

- It is said that ‘demon’ is not the best word to describe this creature. It is something ancient and mighty, unnamed, something that will subject to god only.

- This ‘demon’ was a part of Corypheus’ plan of making Tevinter great again. According to this plan, Minrathous was to become the cradle of the new world. If Minrathous had not surrendered to Corypheus, the ‘demon’ would have left the city no choice.

- Most of the population of Minrathous could have perished as a result of this creature awakening.

- Enchanted predators and monsters resulting from magical experiments seem to be common in Minrathous.

Elven experiments

- In Nevarra, under a mountain with three asymmetric peaks wrapped around each other, there is a dwarven thaig. This thaig is called Hormak, and it was lost to the darkspawn hundreds of years ago.

- In Hormak, Grey Wardens have found elven halls, where experiments on living were conducted. And it is quite lively in these halls now.

- There is a huge pool with a greyish fluid that reeks of brine. It creates hybrids.

- There were different types of hybrids: darkspawn with other darkspawn, animals with other animals, darkspawn with animals, and even a centipede and a Grey Warden hybrid.

- When a hurlock stepped in the greyish fluid, it was enveloped and then transformed into a drake and a hurlock hybrid.

- The transformed Grey Warden said that the fluid affects ‘them’ (sentient races?) differently. To be transformed, it is not enough to touch it. The fluid should get inside the body.

- All over the place were large repetitive bas-reliefs depicting ancient elven. There were three types of them. The first one showed majestic elven kings and queens with reverent supplicants. The second one showed elven mages healing sick. The third showed big aravels, drawn by herds of hallas, going to distant mountains (one of the mountains had three peaks wrapped around each other).

- Later, those bas-reliefs were described differently. On the first one, elven rulers were arrogant and despised their subjects, who seemed to be in great terror. On the second one, mages weren’t healing sick, but on the contrary, they were injecting corruption into bodies. On the third, a halla had a strange rounded body and very long and ridged horns, and an aravel had bars on its windows, which made it look like a cage.

- Somewhere at the entrance of the halls was one more type of repetitive bas-reliefs. It showed three figures: a supplicant, a priestess, and a monster. On each subsequent bas-relief, a supplicant and a monster were different, while the priestess remained the same. It seemed that with each subsequent bas-relief, her grin grew wider.

- The experiments are directed by some will, which is referred to as a female. ‘She’ is not yet there, ‘they’ are waiting for ‘her’.

- Symbols of horns of a halla are present on each column in the halls.

- According to bas-reliefs, there are twelve such places in total.

The Inquisition members and allies

For completeness, this part should have included information from the comic, but I tried to avoid that.

- According to Tevinter Nights, Varric and Charter remained in the ranks of the Inquisition.

- Charter mentions her lover, Tessa.

- Vaea and ser Aaron show up but without a clear relation to the Inquisition.

- There are two mages, Vadis and Irian, who saved a peaceful Qunari settlement called Kont-aar from an agent of Fen'Harel, thus keeping the chance of subtle peace between the Ben-Hassrath and Tevinter. The Ben-Hassrath returned the favour by directing said mages to Kirkwall, to a certain dwarf, where they intend to go after seeing Val Royeaux.

- Sutherland and Company are still loyal to the ideals of the Inquisition.

- Quentin Calla, who was a bearer of the enchanted clay disk for a while, provided the Inquisition with some information.

- Philliam, a Bard!, (formerly) Sister Laudine, and Brother Ferdinand Genitivi, with the help of the Lord of the Fortune, Mateo, accepted and completed the quest from the Inquisition.

Fen’Harel and the red lyrium idol

- The red lyrium idol's adventures ended. It is now in Solas' hands, or at least he says so.

- There are three descriptions of the red lyrium idol's appearance. The first one, made by the dwarf, the Carta assassin: two figures, too thin to be dwarves, caressing each other. The second one, by Mortalitasi: two lovers or a god mourning the sacrifice. The third, by Solas: crowned figure comforting another one. (Note: I remind you these are not exact quotes but a translation of the translation, and nuances might have been lost.)

- Some qualities of the idol: red lyrium weighs more than the usual one; the idol is liquid inside; it reacts to other lyrium.

- The idol created or revealed a ritual blade.

- Solas calls the idol his.

- The Mortalitasi recounted the events in the Fade in which Solas took a form of a giant wolf the size of a high dragon. He had burning eyes like those of a pride demon and wings of fire which later resolved themselves into lesser demons. The Fade is called his natural home, and it is said spirits serve him gladly.

- Solas pays special attention to the actions of the Inquisition.

- Members of Fen'Harel's cult would rather die than be captured.

- The ritual the Dread Wolf performs already affects the Fade.

Random interesting facts

- The Qunari slowly cut down a part of the Arlathan Forest.

- The Ben-Hassrath are said to know the most about Solas’ actions.

- Among four killed Talons was Giuli Arainai, Eighth Talon, and this might be a good time for Zevran to show up somehow.

- There was a lyrium crystal that produced a light with shades of green and yellow in Hormak.

- Dorian no longer has slaves, only hired labourers.

- Josephine sent Dorian some good Antivan wine. :)

- Vaea now possesses a healing artefact, which seems to be able to heal anything except death.

- There is an example of a dwarven metal prosthetic of a leg, which does not seem to restrict movement in any way.

Since I’ve read Tevinter Nights after the last Dragon Age Day... - Evka became a Grey Warden and did rescue the next one!

- The hunger demon that turned a person into a werewolf in the village called Eichweill was not completely defeated.

- It seems those elven artefacts do strengthen the Veil, after all.

- The Randy Dowager is Ferdinand Genitivi. Five scarves fluttered in shock out of five.

⠀

This is all for Tevinter Nights for now. I did not include plenty of curious facts, probably enough for another post. I hope you enjoyed it anyway!

If you have any corrections regarding facts, or grammar, etc., don’t hesitate to DM me! Or you may leave a comment in my ask box if you want to stay anonymous.

Thank you for the attention, and have a nice day!

[softpine]

Could we get another you don't have to read but it's interesting text post?? 👉👈

omg i hope this is what you meant, but umm here’s some backstory about griffin’s roommates? because even my nameless extras apparently need deep lore in my mind?? fjkjsd

TW: mentions of drug addiction, homelessness, religion, abuse, and biphobia. + me not being able to stop talking ever.

jeremy; 19. gay. [also the guy from this post.] jeremy grew up smack in the middle of the bible belt. his parents wanted him to grow up and be a pastor like all the generations before him. he was a model child and no one expected him to run away, so his parents actually thought he was kidnapped when, on a random tuesday, he left in the middle of the night with nothing but the clothes on his back. the police found him wandering towards the bus stop just a few hours later and dropped him back at home. everyone then repeated the same cycle again and again for years, before jeremy’s parents got fed up and agreed to legally emancipate him if he agreed to just stop embarrassing their family. he finally hit the road on his own when he was 15.

he met griffin at a train station out west a while later. griffin had just left his aunt’s house, and neither of them had any place to be. jeremy is the one that taught him how to pickpocket (although there was a lot less flirting involved in jeremy’s method – he relies heavily on the “dumb tourist desperately needing directions” angle). but jeremy can never stay in one place too long, so he left. a year later, they happened to bump into each other in another state and decided a coincidence like that was too big to ignore. so they started traveling together and eventually ended up in nyc, where they stayed. (well, kinda. jeremy disappears for weeks at a time and comes back with all kinds of stories.)

griffin sometimes gets pissed because jeremy likes to equate their 2 childhoods, but they were really nothing alike. sure, jeremy’s family was oppressive and he could never be himself around them, but they were wealthy, they loved him, they never laid a hand on him, and they’re still hoping he comes home someday. jeremy didn’t leave because he had to, he left because he wanted to. but he can’t seem to grasp the difference. still, he listened when griffin told him he should reach out to his family and let them know he’s okay. now they have scheduled phone calls once a month and they’re all happy with that amount of communication. 

all in all, jeremy is still a kid. he loves comic books, action figures, the atari he & griffin split 50/50, and going to the movies. he’s always looking for the next big adventure or something to make him feel more alive. unfortunately, that’s taken him to some darker places with drugs and alcohol, but he’s doing okay right now. he was worried about moving into an apartment because he thought it would make him feel too trapped, but he actually likes having a place that he chose, that no one is forcing him to be at. oh and no, he and griffin have never dated. jeremy just doesn’t know what personal space means. 

eddie; 34. straight [but probably aro/ace in modern terms]. he’s already been divorced three times, which he assumed is because he's a pushover, never fights for anything or takes his own stance, and seemingly lacks passion in every aspect of his life. for almost ten years, he worked as a personal accountant in the upper east side. his days were mundane: he ate the same breakfast (oatmeal), the same lunch (ham & cheese sandwich), and the same dinner (chicken noodle soup) every day. somewhere around the time of his third divorce, he realized he wasn’t going to find fulfillment unless he searched for it, so he quit his job, cashed out his family inheritance, and traveled through europe. as he was living in hostels and hitchhiking and relying on the kindness of strangers, he started to become well-acquainted with the homeless communities in every place he visited. he realized how out of touch he had become, and how privileged he was to be bored with his life. and thus, he had found his passion.

when he returned to new york, he got a new job in finance for a nonprofit organization for the homeless. that was nice and all, but he never got to see the benefits of his work, so he started volunteering at food banks and shelters. that’s where he met jeremy and griffin. jeremy was fascinated by how truly dull eddie is. he kept waiting for eddie to reveal some deep, wild, secret part of him, but it never happened. eddie never even bragged about his adventures in europe; he would always turn the conversation back around to others. by the time jeremy realized he really is that boring, he was already looking up to eddie as an older brother type (and griffin was just along for the ride).

eddie is the one that’s actually renting the apartment and then renting out the extra space to griffin, jeremy, and vincent at dirt cheap rates while they get on their feet. he agreed to keep doing this as long as they all have jobs (pickpocketing doesn’t count) and try to stay clean in jeremy’s case.

vincent; 21. bi. vincent grew up comfortable, but not wealthy, in queens, with his family who emigrated from singapore before he was born. his parents later got divorced, and now he’s the oldest of a combined total of seven siblings, though he’s always been closer to his mom and stepdad. growing up, his grades were just average, he had a few friends but was too shy to be popular, and he wasn’t particularly athletic either – he was on the swim team for a while, but he hated the competitive aspect. his favorite part was staying behind after practice and having the pool all to himself; he would float on his back for hours, just watching the pool lights reflecting on the ceiling. he struggled to fit in at school. this all changed when he started weightlifting during his senior year. he mainly started doing it as a way to keep himself busy, but he soon realized that the more fit he got, the more attention people paid him. he liked that.

soon after, he started his first relationship with a girl, kelly, who he intended to marry someday. they graduated high school together and both enrolled at the same college – though vincent hadn’t decided a major yet – and things were going great. he even came out to her as bi and she took it really well (especially for the time). they were settled into an apartment of their own at 19.

in his quest to figure out his major, vincent took up all kinds of new hobbies, his favorite being drumming. he even started a garage band with some of his friends. they started playing house shows, which ended up being somewhat popular, though they don’t expect to make it big anytime soon. at one of these shows, vincent ran into griffin and they bonded over their love of rock music. when vincent found out that griffin didn’t have a place to stay that night, he invited him to sleep on his couch – understandably, kelly was angry that he didn’t ask first.

kelly got increasingly more upset as time went on and vincent & griffin became better friends. even though nothing romantic ever happened between them (and i sure hope not, because griffin was like 16 at the start), kelly was convinced that vincent was cheating on her and that she was only there to cover for his “true” sexuality. when they inevitably broke up, vincent was devastated. not only that, but he now had to find a new place to live asap. that’s when griffin mentioned that he and jeremy were renting rooms from eddie and that vincent was welcome to join. and that takes us up to the present! (well, the “present” being 1987).

[lizbotw]

SEVEN MINUTES IN HELL: INTRODUCTON

YOU’VE ENTERED THE FOREST: CHOOSE A PATH (MASTERLIST)

pairing: various (bakugou, iida, jirou, kaminari, midoriya, todoroki) x reader

summary: You go adventuring in the woods with your friends as part of the Halloween spirit, but things don’t exactly go as planned.

a/n: this is the intro post to my collab with kristy! since it’s a choose your own adventure story, check out the masterlist here for additional details and for links to the other routes ♡ i hope you all enjoy and feedback is very much appreciated!

word count: 4.1k

Go exploring in the forest for the hell of it. It’ll be fun, they said. Halloween isn’t complete without late night adventures, they’d said. We’ll only be gone for a few hours. Mr. Aizawa wouldn’t mind.

Well, you know what? They had lied. And by they, you meant Kaminari because of course he had been the mastermind behind this grand idea. He was wrong about all of it and especially that last point because in your heart of hearts, as much as you wanted to believe you were all magically given permission to go perusing on your own, you knew that a detention notice awaited all of you when you got back. Not that anyone seemed to care.

Leaves crunching underfoot, jackets and sweaters wrapped snugly around you, Kaminari’s victims—ahem, your friends that he had roped into this scheme—trudged behind him as he jabbered on about the positives of this bonding experience.

“Do you think we’ll actually find anything?” Midoriya piped up after Kaminari’s latest spiel about this forest being infamous for the random skulls travelers always swore they spotted conveniently resting at the bases of trees or perched upon its branches. There was a barely noticeable tremble in his voice at the prospect.

You heard a scoff. “Slim chance,” Bakugou sneered from next to you as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. His hands had been stuffed into his pockets the entire time, kicking stray rocks in his path at every opportunity. “Who the hell would believe that anyway?”

As much as you wanted to scold him for ruining the Halloween spirit, you had to agree. What were the chances of you finding anything noteworthy during this expedition? There was a reason no one could ever produce actual pictures or evidence of the horrors they had supposedly witnessed.

Kaminari was apt at ignoring skeptics though—maybe a little too good at it—and Midoriya’s interest seemed to have lit a fire in him as he whirled around to face the group now, walking backwards. His expression said it all—Finally, someone believes me! “Duh, we have to carry something back to show the others. They’re totally missing out!”

“I don’t think a skeleton is an appropriate thing to bring back to our classmates. Perhaps they’d enjoy something educational, like a sample of leaves from the different trees or-”

“No one cares, four-eyes.” You’d lost count how many times Bakugou had interrupted Iida at this point. And each and every time it had resulted in an argument—including now. That would be entertaining and all if not for the fact that you were pretty sure your right ear was going deaf from being next to them.

You tuned out the biting remarks (Bakugou) and the gasps of surprise at the vulgarity (Iida), as had become routine to you at this point. What was that saying about groups tearing each other apart during horror movies before anyone even gets killed off? Or maybe you had just made that saying up yourself… hmm… well whatever it was, it definitely applied right now.

“This is stupid,” Jirou mumbled from your other side and you almost groaned. How did you end up sandwiched between the resident pessimists of the group again?

Maybe it was the combination of Bakugou and Jirou that was starting to make you skeptical, or maybe it was the fact that you had been walking for who knows how long and your legs were tired, or the fact that you were hungry and thirsty, or that there was no reception out here, or—or maybe it was just all of it. You wrinkled your nose the more you thought about it. Maybe everyone was right, there really was nothing out here. You suddenly wanted to go home, sick of the whistling wind, the towering trees, and the flits of rapidly fading sunlight that shone through the leaves.

“Kaminari, maybe we should turn back.”

“That’s what I’ve been saying!” Jirou threw her hands up in exasperation. “Why did any of us agree to this anyway?”

“Just for the record, I’m only here to make sure none of you do anything irrational.” That was true. The only reason Iida of all people ended up on this expedition was because he’d heard Kaminari advertising the idea a little too loudly and realized there was no way to talk him out of it. So here he was, playing babysitter.

“Yeah? Well, just for the record, I don’t need you to watch me.” And Bakugou was back to stirring up trouble, just when the latest argument had started to die down and the ringing in your ear had stopped.

You almost felt bad for Kaminari being at the receiving end of everyone’s frustration until you saw that his grin was no where close to faltering and in fact he seemed to take the challenge head on. You admired his drive but you were wondering for the umpteenth time why he didn’t just bring Kirishima, Mina, or Sero on the expedition too—they wouldn't be complaining… much. (Probably because those three were so into Halloween it was insane. Tough chance of getting them away from the yearly Halloween festival planning. They didn’t want to miss anything.)

He clicked his tongue in disapproval, shaking his finger at the others. If anything, you were impressed how he was able to navigate the forest walking backwards while continuing his chiding. On second thought… your eyes darted up ahead to a rapidly approaching object. Wait, was that—

“You guys seriously have to lighten uHHH-AH.” A crash echoed through the trees as Kaminari tripped over a well-placed log, his back hitting the ground and knocking the air out of him. In the distance you saw a few birds fly out of the trees in surprise at the noise, beating wings black against the afternoon sky.

“You really should’ve been watching where you were going,” Todoroki spoke up from the back of the group after a moment of shocked silence from everyone—even Bakugou had shut up.

“Are… are you okay?” Midoriya was the first to check up on him, walking forward and crouching down next to his friend, craning his neck to examine him closer.

Kaminari sat up, rubbing his head. “Yeah, never been better.”

“We should all be more careful. We don’t have a first aid kit to use if something goes wrong.” Please, Iida, it’s not that serious—but also, good point. In the middle of the woods with no first aid kit—way to make this seem way more scary than it actually is.

“Guys, quit worrying—”

“I wasn’t worrying,” both Bakugou and Jirou cut in.

“—I’m fine, see?” He stood up, rustling the leaves at his feet further. He did seem fine, although you were sure he would start complaining later. “I’m tough!”

Kaminari admitting that everything was alright opened the floodgates for the concern from the others to morph back into claims of how you should definitely not be in this forest at all, now paired with chastising him for not being more observant.

“I’m turning back. And you’re coming with me so we don’t get lost.” Jirou took a hold of your arm to pull you after her. “You're the only rational one around here.”

“Wait, but I-”

“I uh… I don’t think it's a good idea for us to split up.” Midoriya’s attempt at stopping Jirou didn’t exactly work as intended.

“Then we should all go.”

“That’s not really what I-”

“It’s probably for the best,” Todoroki said. He shrugged when you looked at him in surprise; he had been fairly neutral about the ordeal up until that point. “Kaminari,” he turned to look at the blond now, “We should get your head checked out too, to make sure you don’t have a concussion.”

“I didn't hit my head,” Kaminari whined, “Seriously guys, you worry way too much.” He shifted his weight to his other foot, crossing his arms as he took a second to think. “...but fine, if you really want to go back, we’ll go. Not just because I fell though.”

“Finally,” Jirou breathed out. You felt her grip on your arm tighten for a second and then she released it.

“So… which way?” Midoriya prompted, eyes scanning the trees that were starting to look a little too similar now that you thought about it.

Everyone turned expectantly to Kaminari, although it seemed that the same idea was already budding in their minds as well.

He blinked at the sudden attention and then a sheepish smile overtook his features and he rubbed the back of his head, averting his gaze. “Well…”

“We’re lost,” Bakugou deadpanned. It wasn’t a question.

Kaminari tried to skirt around the issue, making up half-excuses and telling all of you not to worry, fumbling with his words. He wasn't very convincing. Realizing it was a lost cause a minute into the act, he gave up with a deep sigh. “Okay, yeah, we’re lost. We have been… for a while.” He mumbled that last part.

“We what?”

Kaminari held his hands up in defense. “Woah, woah, Bakugou, calm down. I'm sure I can get us out of here, no sweat.”

“I knew we passed that tree before. We’ve been walking in circles this entire time.” You looked over to see who had said that and found Todoroki, hand on his chin, staring contemplatively at a large tree with a spiral carved into its trunk. Now that you thought about it, it did look familiar.

The quiet that had followed ever since Kaminari fell was slowly falling apart, being replaced with loud, frantic discussions about what the fuck were you going to do. The bordering desperation in some of their voices wasn’t well hidden—it didn’t help ease anyone’s nerves that none of you had told a single soul where you were headed off to, hoping that no one would notice your absence at all. You were starting to realize just how many bad decisions everyone here had made up until this point. Note to self: maybe don’t get mad at horror movies portagonists for acting stupid once you get back to your dorm and flip on a new show to watch (now you were thinking about your dorm and how cozy you could have been in it right now, safe and sound with all of your friends for an impromptu movie night).

You shook your head. No time to think about what you could’ve been doing. Someone around here had to do something about this chaos because it seemed like everyone was seconds away from being at each other’s throats and you're pretty sure that's exactly what happens before things go horribly wrong in horror movies.

You cleared your throat, clapping your hands together. You took a deep breath, filling your lungs with air before opening your mouth and— “Shut up!” The echo of your shout had even more birds in the distance fleeing from their trees (oops?).

Everyone fell quiet, all looking at you now and their pinning stares were not happy. “Um…” You hadn’t actually thought of what to say once you got their attention. What could any of you do? “We need a plan.”

“No, duh.” Bakugou rolled his eyes.

You fixed him with a glare. “I said shut up. Anyway, we’re not going to get anything done at this rate if we all keep panicking.”

“You’re right,” Iida spoke up, “We all need to remain calm. Let’s discuss this properly.”

Looks like your plan to instill some order among the group hadn’t been a complete bust because everyone was nodding in agreement now. Maybe this could work and you all would be safely back at U.A. within a few hours.

That had been until the downpour had started, rain splattering through the trees and soaking into the fabric of your shirt.

A drop of water came from above, landing on your arm and chilling to your core. Then there was another and another, cold and unrelenting. No one had noticed the gray clouds heavy with moisture rolling in and it was like it all came down at once, stunning you all in place before you realized you were getting absolutely soaked.

It was a blur what happened after that, but let’s just say that the sense of order from before didn't last long. Those who had hoods on their jackets pulled them up, and anyone who didn’t held their hands up to shield themselves, or pulled their jackets up and over their heads by the collar. In a frenzy to find shelter, you all took off, feet thumping against the ground, yelling about your horrible luck so far. It was as if the forest had decided that you had been standing around too long talking and that it was time to get a move on.

The canopy of trees darkened the area, and you had to focus on the forest floor to prevent yourself from tripping several times. It was a miracle you all were able to stick together considering that it felt like you ran off in a seemingly random direction. The search for cover was suspiciously short though when Kaminari spotted a cabin in the distance. No one thought to question it much and before you knew it, you had shoved open the unlocked door and collapsed inside. The sound of the rain against the roof was deafening, but once the door was shut the clatter wasn’t as bad.

After everyone had caught their breaths and settled in, they’d gone back to arguing, mostly because no one was expecting to get drenched like that. Cute outfits? Ruined. Kaminari was going to be put on the chopping block for that one.

“It doesn’t make sense for us to be stuck here. Can’t we just use our quirks to find our way out?” you asked. The solution seemed obvious to you and you folded your arms against your chest, trying to keep warm.

Todoroki stood near one of the small windows, dusty from years of disuse, and swiped a hand over the glass to clean it. “I don’t think we should go out just yet. There’s low visibility with all this rain so there’s a high chance we might lose track of each other.”

Grumbles of agreement at that brought you to where you were now, sitting ducks in an ominous building in the woods with some of your best friends. This was starting to seem like some over done, predictable horror movie plot more and more.

“Can you help me carry those?”

You snapped out of your stupor, eyes drawn to the fire blazing in the mantle, and then up at the person who had spoken. Jirou.

She was pointing at a stack of logs near the door that Todoroki was crouched in front of, running his hands over the wooden pieces. You wondered how long you had been sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall for, acutely aware of the ache in your back and the stiffness in your legs now. This was boring.

“Well?” Your eyes snapped back to Jirou, her head tilted expectantly.

You cracked a smile, rising to your feet. “What? Are they too heavy for you?”

She rolled her eyes and pushed your arm lightly in retaliation before walking over to the stack. You followed in her wake.

Up close now, you could see that Todoroki was using his quirk to dry off the wood, the dripping droplets that splattered onto the wooden floor slowly dissipating away under his touch.

Strangely enough, aside from a light coating of dust, the cabin seemed ready to live in (or, er, crash in… for now, until you got back to U.A. and could forget this ever happened) and a small pile of logs had been situated next to an empty fireplace. Todoroki had thrown the wood in and lit it up no problem, casting light over the tiny room and providing some much needed warmth, but there wasn’t enough to keep the flame burning long.

The rain had eased up not long ago and with that Iida had decided to venture out to find more kindling. It didn’t take him long to skirt around the area to find branches and fallen logs that could be lugged back to the cabin with his super speed, and currently he was still out there gathering extra pieces that you’d surely need through the night. Despite the rain no longer pouring down, the sky had darkened significantly and it was decided that it was probably best if none of you went very far out there; same reason as the rain—low visibility. (You’d already been stuck here for a few hours so a few more until sunlight breached the horizon didn’t seem too bad… right?)

Normally wet kindling wasn’t ideal and would be a recipe for disaster once the flames caught ahold of it and the room filled with smoke from the combination, but luckily for you, Todoroki was perfect for survival expeditions. The plan was that he would simply dry off the wood with light heat from his hands, similar to how he had dried off most of your clothes earlier on to prevent anyone from getting sick from the cold.

While Iida went looking for large enough logs outside, Todoroki worked diligently to dry them off, sitting expectantly by the door for the next bundle. Then, one of the others would lug the wood either to rest next to the fireplace for when you needed it, or throw it into the flame when it started to die down. There weren’t exactly perfect pieces of wood laying around the forest, so many of them burned out quickly if they were too small and had to be replaced frequently.

You noticed the flickering light of the current flame starting to die down. Todoroki noticed your footsteps behind him and looked back at you before standing and moving so that you and Jirou could grab either end of a large log, slowly walk it over to the flame and then swing your arms for momentum a bit before throwing it in. You repeated the process with a few more smaller pieces and within no time the flame was back to its healthy, roaring self. The glow it cast would be cozy if the situation was any one but this.

Wiping your brow from the exertion, you had your other hand on your hip as you stared into the fire and admired your work. Jirou lingered a second by your side doing the same before walking off to go slump down in a seat somewhere, and you felt eyes on the back of your head once she left. You spared a glance over your shoulder to find Todoroki still standing in the same spot as before with his arms crossed watching you.

“How long do you think these will last us?” you asked to break the tension, referring to the slowly growing pile of wood.

Todoroki’s eyes shifted away from you and to the pile on the floor. “That should be good. I’ll tell Iida we should be set for the night when he comes back.”

You nodded and looked down. Not able to think of anything else to say, you padded back over to the corner you had been sitting in before and slotted yourself against the wall as had become familiar at this point, leaning your head back and closing your eyes. Maybe if you ignored the situation it would all pass faster.

“This is just plain depressing.” You pried one eye open in exasperation at the interruption—come on, you had just gotten in the “zone” (oh well, not like you had a time limit on doing that anyway). Kaminari was standing right in front of the fireplace at the head of the room, addressing all of you. He was back to giving you that disapproving shake of his head, the same kind he gave when he thought you guys were being boring. Uh oh… where’s this going to go? It was great and all that someone wasn’t feeling down in the dumps over this whole thing, but with it being Kaminari you weren’t sure how high the scale of how great it was actually went.

Bakugou’s eyes were following Kaminari’s movements now, waiting to see what dumb idea he had probably come up with this time—preiovusly, Bakugou had been staring out of the window at the full moon, elbow resting on the window sill and head in his palm (it was nice to see him calm and peaceful like that for a change). Even Midoirya, who had been alternating between sit-ups, push-ups, and planks in the the opposite corner of the room (where he got the energy for all of that right now was beyond you), had sat up to focus on Kaminari, his knees bent and his arms looped around his knees.

“You guys seriously need to lighten up,” Kaminari continued, dismissively gesturing with his hands as if to ward off the negativity all of you were emitting right now.

You saw Jirou quirk an eyebrow. “Yeah? And how should we do that? In case you haven’t noticed, we’re stranded here.”

“Well, yeah, I know that, but that doesn't mean we can't have some fun.” He could tell he was already losing everyone’s attention as you diverted your gazes, each wanting to go back to being solemn on your own. “Why don’t we play a game?” he tried as a last ditch effort.

You let out a huff through your nose. “And that game would be…?”

“Truth or dare! Obviously.”

“Right,” you breathed out to yourself, rolling your eyes, although you couldn’t help but smile a little at the thought.

“I wouldn’t mind that.” Bless your heart, Midoriya.

“Awesome! See, at least someone around here knows how to enjoy themselves.” Kaminari planted his hands on his hips and the light of the fireplace behind him illuminated his outline. “Okay, the rest of you sticks in the mud have to play too. Form a circle in the middle of the room. Chop chop now. You have to admit it beats sitting around like this.”

You looked over to your side when you heard Jirou sigh and then the creak of the floorboards when she got up. “I guess.”

Midoriya had already gotten up from his spot and had lowered himself down to sit near the center. Jirou followed suit.

“Whatever.” Bakugou cast the window one last look before he moved towards the forming circle.

Just as Todoroki stepped forward as well, the door swung open with a creak, and Iida stepped inside, dropping the wooden bundles in his arms to the floor. Just as he moved to go back outside to no doubt collect more, not even sparing a glance further into the room, Todoroki stopped him, reaching out a hand to grasp his arm. “We have enough, Iida. I think we’ll be fine tonight.”

He nodded. “Sounds good then. I guess all that’s left to do now is wait this whole thing out,” Iida said. His gaze flickered from Todoroki’s face to the wood pile near the fireplace in order to see if there really was enough and that was when he noticed the circle forming in the center of the room. “…what’s going on?”

“We’re playing truth or dare!” Kaminari declared from the head of the circle where he’d sat down.

“You don’t have to play if you don’t want to,” Todoroki said.

“Nonsense. I think it’ll be good to lift our spirits. Excellent idea, Kaminari.” Kaminari was absolutely beaming at the praise from Iida.

Iida stepped further into the room and leaned forward to shake his head out from side to side, water droplets flying from his hair—they’d probably dripped down from the towering trees onto him as he moved around outside, even after the storm.

As Todoroki and Iida choose their spots in the circle, you did as well, rising from your place against the wall, stretching, and then situating yourself among the others.

Once everyone was done squirming in their seats and getting comfortable, Kaminari clapped his hands together and leaned forward as if he had a secret to tell you all. A mischievous, almost dangerous glint was in his eye and the fireplace cast shadows over his face. “Let’s play.”

Catching the shine of the full moon in the far edge of the room in your peripheral, you shivered. You had a feeling the night was about to go from humbling to downright horrifying in true Halloween fashion.

TRUTH OR DARE: WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE?

[blackberry-gingham]

The love language concept sounds interesting! I’d say George’s love language/the way he shows love is physical touch, Paul’s is receiving gifts, Ringo’s is positive affirmation mixed with quality time, and tbh I’m not to sure for John. maybe acts or service or quality time for him?

Mwahaha, you've fallen into my trap! The truth is I wanted to do this topic more or less for myself, but felt bad bc I still have a few requests left to do. So thank you for sending in a "request" for me so that I can do one out of order real quick >:3

Lol but really tho, thank you for humoring me and these are good! I could honestly see all of these, but for John I'd say acts of service with you, bc the "To Do" stuff just sounds like his character tbh, but maybe also I feel like there's some physical touch too???

Ik I've heard that John kind of actually didn't like being touched, but I mean... If you look at literally any picture of him with Yoko, he's always at least holding her hand, if not just totally draped all over her lol, so I'm assuming for an S/O it's totally different!

But anyway, here's some headcannons real quick and then back to requests. Thanks everyone!

---

George

Honestly? I feel like George would just not be able to keep his hands off you

Like, not necissarily in a sexual way (although that too, if you're in the mood lol), it's just that he loves to let you and everyone else know you're his

He's not all too shy about it either lol

I mean obviously he saves the more lovey dovey stuff for private places, but in public he still has a lot to offer

Everytime he sees you he kisses you either on the cheek, forehead, or mouth and then pulls you in for a hug

Always

Then the rest of the time, as long as he doesn't have to be working, he likes to hold your hand and play with your hair

And if he's feeling a little risqué, he likes to let you sit on his lap and cuddle against him

In private tho...

Oh, he is all over you!!!

You are his sanctuary and safe haven away from the public eye and the daily grind that comes with being a Beatle

I've seen quite a few quotes from geo lamenting the fact that he and the others had literally no private life thanks to their stardom

So yeah, believe me when I say he could live a thousand years and still never feel like he could repay you for giving him the rest and love he needs

He'd be like a long, giant cat. Wherever you are, whatever you're doing, if he has an opportunity to snuggle up to you, he takes it

And if he's not exhausted, and if you let him !! he likes to just touch and kiss your body and face

Having that closeness and intimacy is so important to him, he wants to let you know how deeply he loves you

All of you

And of course, the best way you can return his love language back to him is by returning the intimacy he does for you!

When in Rome, after all

Honestly, just by accepting his offers when he initiates a request to hold your hand or hug or cuddle, he already appreciates that!

But if you initiate any of those things, he's definitely feeling the love!!

Although, one thing you like to do a bit different is giving massages

Of course George would certainly give you one if you asked!

But since he's usually tired, either mentally or physically, from always being on the go, you like to do him a favor lol

And he loves it

Seriously, you've never seen a man more blissed out then George gets over something as simple as a back or scalp massage

Assuming he doesn't fall asleep under the spell of your skillful fingers, he repays you with kisses or cuddles after :)

John

Ok idk if I'm like projecting, or reaching, or SOMETHING along those lines, but I feel like of all the boys, John is probably the one most looking for a true partner, as in like his other half

Paul is very close behind with his relationship with Linda, but for John it always came off as a need for him, more then like a want or nice thing to have

So anyway, all this to say that as far as acts of service goes, I think he gets a lot of security out of receiving this!

Like, whenever John's feeling particularly stressed or overwhelmed having you there to approach the issues with an objective mindset is a HUGE relief

Really, like I cannot stress this enough

Phrases like, "What can I do to take some pressure off for you?"

Or, "Well what if we just focus on x for now, and then we can take care of y and z tomorrow?"

All give him such a powerful sense of relief

And of course, the way that you, you know, actually follow up on your word, makes him fall even deeper in love with you then he thought possible

Now on the other hand, is physical touch

While this is a part of his love language cocktail, John likes to express this one a bit more then he likes to receive it

You see, unlike George, John is a little more reserved with his PDA

He will kiss you and hold your hand of course! But unfortunately his anxiety is a thing, so as much as he hates it, he has to reserve his physical affection for more private settings

But when you two are alone, he's like puddy in your hands!

He likes to just hold you a lot

It doesn't matter if you're preoccupied with something else, like a book or the telly, he just wants to have physical contact with you

And if you can do any of those things cuddled up on his lap or against his chest, even better!

But also, John definitely loves to get that energy back

He likes it when you give him cute little kisses and pet his head

I think he'd also like it if you rubbed his temples or the bridge of his nose/third eye lol

Wearing glasses all day can get uncomfortable you know!!

I think if you can establish that trust and physical closeness, that's when you'd also get a return on his acts of service

Really, if you've bonded this deeply with John he'd do literally anything for you

Whatever you need, whatever you want, if he can do it he will and if he can't he'll find a way to do it anyway!

He'd be loyal to a fault and love you forever after

Paul

Please tell me why I could see Paul being your sugar daddy on the low 😭😭

Really, like he just likes to spoil you!

Honestly if someone showed me proof that the real actual, 78 year old, 2021 Paul McCartney uses stacks of hundred dollar bills as tinder for his fireplace, I literally wouldn't even blink

Like even back in the day, he's got that Beatles' money baby !!! and he.... Kinda doesn't care for it, actually

I personally don't think any of the boys come across as like money hungry or something like that, but I could see Paul especially figuring that he might as well use all this dumb money to buy you things you like!

It may feel overwhelming to be on the receiving end of so many random, but expensive gifts tbh

You might even tell him to stop or that he doesn't have to do all that!!

I think he'd be able to understand that overwhelming you with nice things kinda has the opposite effect of what he's intending, but....

He just gets a little carried away sometimes lol

I mean growing up he didn't have all that much, and even now, like obviously nice things are nice, but meh

What he really wants to do is make sure you're enjoying the high life too!

I could see him doing more of writing you songs and music instead so that he can still fulfil his desire to give, should you feel uncomfortable with the fancy gifts

But yeah, if you're uncomfortable he totally would get that and dial back the materialism, but if you don't mind, then he doesn't either!!

Now you might be wondering how you, a delightfully average person, could impress Paul McCartney with a gift giving love language...

I mean, what do you give the man who has everything?

Well I'd tell you this... It's simple!

You could bring him literally anything that you find meaningful and be like "This made me think of you!" or "I just thought you'd like this!" and he'll love it!

He would definitely run up some organized collections of the little things you've given him

He has some dedicated display boxes for all the random, shiny rocks and pebbles you've found

A little filing drawer of all the notes you've ever wrote him

And if you like art or photography, he'd decorate his personal spaces with your work!

Of course he'd appreciate traditional gifts too tho

Like a watch or bass strings or a new tie ect ect

But the thing for you to not get caught up on is the price!

That doesn't matter to him :)

He likes your gifts bc they came from you!

Ringo

Ok, positive affirmation is definitely a big thing for Ringo

He gets roasted a lot by the boys and even the media, and all in good fun I suppose, but after a while enough is enough you know?

Not to mention, he just feels a bit... Lesser then?? Compared to the others and their musical talent

So the poor guy really needs a break!

Literally, even just little one word sentences of encouragement mean sooo much to him

"I'm so proud of you Ritchie!"

"That sounded wonderful!"

"You've done a great job today at the studio, good work!"

Stuff like that makes him melt

Of course he also appreciates the more conventional things like "I love you" and when you call him handsome!

And as for the spending quality time, that comes easily!

Ringo looooves to take you out on dates!

Now yes, there's your typical movie date, dinner, dancing, all that

But his favorite things to do is go on little adventures!

He takes you to the park, the beach, out to explore thrift and consignment stores, and anywhere else you want to check out!

However, not everyone wants to run around outside 24/7

So in the house, he likes doing things that you two can do together!

Painting is a big one, seeing as it's his other hobby, but it could honestly be anything, like puzzles, board games, or just watching TV!

I'm trying to think of how he'd return the words words of affirmation side of his love language, but I think it would be a little harder for him to do then expressing quality time tbh

You just make him so darn shy!

What with all your good looks and kindness, he just feels a little overwhelmed

Have you ever seen a work of art, or architecture, or even a landscape so breathtaking that you don't really know where to start when describing it to someone?

Yeah, it's like that

He definitely wants to try tho!

I think he'd stick to simple things like complimenting your outfits and praising your work or personal projects you show him!

He's worried that that comes across as just common decency tho, so he says "I love you" a lot and tries to make up for his bad way with words with quality time

[moonwitchify]

The lonely boy

Green was a lonely boy. He spent most of his childhood training, so he didn't have any time to make friends. There was no one he could befriend there after all. But he was okay with that. He didn't really know what he was missing and, quite honestly, he didn't understand that. It was hard for him to open up, to trust anyone, to let anyone in. He was raised to be a trainer, raised to battle, raised to be alone. He didn't know friendship.

So you can imagine his surprise when some random, impulsive kid, suddenly decided Green would be his rival. The universe also seemed to be having a lot of fun with Green's uncertainty, as they ended up bumping into each other constantly. Red was...a mystery to him. He was like the sun. Optimistic, bright, extrovert, caring, warm... He was the perfect opposite of Green's moon. Yet they always seemed to have some kind of cosmic force pulling them together, and it was starting to drive Green mad.

It was when they accidentally swapped pokemon that he realised he was missing something.

At first, he was confused. What DID Red do to his team? They were acting so...Redly. Green didn't understand. Even Porygon, who kept refusing to follow his commands, was nuzzling to his face happily. Something was missing in his mind but he couldn't quite place it. I mean, his team was acting weird but they seemed...happier. It was a good thing but what WAS it?

As they kept bumping into each other constantly, Red's presence started feeling less overwhelming. Green could only speculate that Red probably realised that he had to be less forceful to get on the rival's good side. Green himself wasn't aware of that at all until he put some thought into it, but he was, undeniably, going soft on Red.

But it was only on their battle that Green finally knew what he was missing.

Red put it clearly on the end of their battle. The battle, it was amazing. Green never felt more alive. He lost, but it was still such a close fight. He was proud seeing how far he's come. And it was obvious that Red helped him get this far. But there was a key feature he was missing. The decisive factor on his loss. "Friendship! But you wouldn't understand...".

Friendship.

Green started at the pokeball in his hand. That was the thing. The thing he couldn't name. He looked up to Red and his rival smiled to him.

Friendship.

Green smiled back.

It was the beginning of a new life for the lonely boy.

He then left to train and everything went wrong: Red disappeared. His mind was in chaos, his heart was in despair. Green never felt so hard the urge to cry. He was surprised at first. Red. The strongest trainer in Kanto. Got kidnapped. Who was so strong to be able to do this?

But then, he realised. Red was gone. His rival was missing. His first and best friend could be...

No.

He immediately stopped the training. He had to rescue Red.

Green wasn't expecting to end up training a young girl in the process. But she had something. A sparkle in her eyes. It was like Red's. Sheer determination that she was taught to convert into battle strength. It was a good way to spend the time he wasn't looking for Red. But every time he looked at her, her smile, her shining eyes. It reminded him so much of Red. Green felt like screaming.

He didn't get a lot of sleep up until Red was safe with them.

They were so busy fighting for their lives that it took Green some time to be hit by the realization that Red was there. His rival was alive. His first and best friend was safe again. He took Red on a walk in the middle of the night and when they were in a safe distance from the girls, Green hugged Red and cried his heart out on his rival's shoulder. He cried all his worries and relieves until he fell asleep. None of the girls questioned the cuddling rivals next morning.

His grandfather got kidnapped because the universe apparently LOVED having Green's loved ones disappearing on him. There was some alien pokemon attacking people and Red apparently fought it. It came as no surprise that Green was worried about Red's situation as it was his first major loss. He tried to comfort his rival, and nowadays he was much more confident on his ability to do so. At this point, they were so close that Red actually was the one and only person that Green went as far as having any form of physical contact with. I know, SHOCKING.

But the whole comfort thing didn't work out and they ended up fighting. Green knew there was a lot on both their heads and that this was probably why the fight happened in the first place, but it still hurt. They were together during most the adventure, but...it wasn't quite right. Green was acting impulsively, had to be held down by Red countless times, they had to do weird stuff so a not-so-sentient old woman would teach them a move and Green was having NO patience with ANYONE for that matter and Red had to keep him from doing something stupid on impulse, which was usually something GREEN would stop RED from. Other than that, their relationship...didn't seem different because of the fight. But the fight was still on his mind.

Despite that, Green was struck with a realization and it felt as if he was struck by lightning. He liked Red. The first thing that gave it away was the way his heart almost stopped as he desperately ran to the ship to see if Red was okay. It came so suddenly that at first he didn't know how to deal with it. On the split second that the possibility that Red could be seriously injured came up, he realised that he couldn't live without his rival.

Then it was the fact that his stupid, idiotic rival, decided it would be a good idea to take off his shirt. Green had NO idea of WHEN he took his shirt off but, ladies and gentlemen, that was the moment the brick hit his head hard. All he could do was try to keep their conversation normal as he not-so-discreetly stared at Red's shirtless body. He wasn't sure if he ended up blushing but he seriously felt like he did. In less than 2 minutes, from the time it took for him to run to the ship and help Red up, he not only realised his feelings were totally NOT platonic, he also had his first gay panic. Why.

And when they thought they could make it, they were turned to stone. And Green. Green just had so much in his mind at this point. But most of it was about Red. Now, he wasn't stupid. He was painfully aware of Yellow's crush on Red. He wasn't sure if she still felt that way, honestly. It was much more obvious when she was younger. Yet Green and Red still had that weird gap between them as a consequence of their fight and he didn't realise how much that was hurting until he noticed how...soft...Red was with Yellow.

It was before they turned to stone.

Red smiled softly as he gave the pokedex to Yellow and Green felt a weird pain on his chest. If Blue noticed, she didn't say a thing, which he was glad for. But then Green was painfully aware that...he might not feel the same. Arceus, it was so much more likely that Red liked Yellow. When Red carefully picked her up and carried her on his arms, Green broke inside. Blue most definitely noticed, but once again, she didn't bring it up. And boy, was Green glad she didn't.

And then, they were petrified, giving Green all the time in the world to think about his recently discovered crush, the fact that it was most probably not mutual and the fact that, for Arceus's sake, they still had that damn fight keeping them apart. It was...horrible, to say the least. He was glad when they were saved and had a fight to deal with. That would keep his mind off the problems that burdened him up to this point. But that was pretty short.

When everything was over and everyone was celebrating their victory, Green found he couldn't bring himself to feel the same joy. Of course, he was glad it was over. But that means that after the storm came the calm. And calm would give Green a lot of time to think about what was breaking him.

Everyone noticed something was off. Green is typically distant, that's pretty normal actually. But not from Red. Red was the exception for everything when it came to Green. However, even from his rival he was distant. Red let the dust set for a bit until he tried talking to him. He sat next to his rival and placed a hand on his back. Green's tense and forced confident posture relaxed immediately and Red smiled softly at him. Green hugged him with all the strength he had left.

-I'm sorry.

Red was confused. Sorry? What was he sorry about? Then, it hit him, and Red found himself feeling incredibly guilty.

-You're...still thinking about our fight?

-Well, I never apologised properly...-Green muttered against Red's shoulder.

Red hugged Green's waist with one hand, the other going to his hair, pulling him closer.

-You dummy. Of course I forgive you. I forgave you a long time ago. We both just had a lot on our minds. It wasn't your fault.

Green smiled a bit. They stayed on each other's arms for what felt like forever.

It would be an understatement to say Green adopted half of Kalos, but mainly a kid named X. He hadn't thought a lot about his crush on Red ever since he arrived on the region. He was busy after all. But the whole situation with X and Pinsir just felt overwhelmingly familiar. The agony in which Pinsir seemed to be in when his rival didn't show up... It reminded Green of when Red was kidnapped.

-That sounds romantic.-X smiled.

Green smiled softly.

-Hopefully one day you'll find someone you can call the one true rival of your life.

-Weirdo.-Shauna replied.

Damn, he's got it bad., they all thought.

Alola. A tropical paradise.

Green hated it.

Okay, he didn't hate Alola, but he hated the heat. Who came up to this- damn 30°C and thought "I should live in here". He WAS dying, that's totally not overreacting.

He was called to be one of the Battle Tree's Battle Legends. He heard the other one would be Red and his heart was totally not jumping out of his chest, thank you very much. He knew his rival would accept, and Green himself thought of the job to be an interesting experience. He only realised what the fact that there were beaches everywhere implied when he got there. Red. A Battle Legend with Green. Runing around in Alola in...small swimsuits...SWEATING.

His heart couldn't take it.

And when Red got to the arranged place, Green realised it was SO MUCH WORSE THEN HE THOUGHT WHY ARCEUS.

Red was so beautiful. Even more than when they last met. Green was taller and slim, but Red. Red gained MUSCLES and the fact that he was only wearing swim trunks was killing Green. He blushed so hard he felt like he could explode. But then, under the Alolan sun, Red smiled at him, and everything just felt like home. They met halfway in a hug and they had no idea how long they stayed like that. Red lifted Green off his feet on the hug like he weighted nothing and they laughed.

Then, they stared at each other and time just seemed to stop. Both leaned forward and their lips met.

And it was the beginning of yet another new life for the once lonely boy.

[crispyflowerblaze]

college tips and thoughts

so i’ve been a college freshman for one semester now, and i feel like that qualifies me to give some of my random tips and thoughts about college! stuff like adjusting to classes and being away from home, roommates and friendships and dating, and more stuff

hopefully this is helpful! this is gonna be broken down into several parts btw

part 1: adjusting

the most important thing to remember is that you can’t do it all, but that’s okay! day to day life is just your new attempt at trying to do however many things you want to do, and in the grand scheme of things it will never feel perfect, but in the moment there’s always something wonderful about that. it seems hard to really live in the moment because of our expectations and plans and goals, but i think the key to living in the moment is to realize that one day can only be composed of so many things. if you can, try to just stay outside a little longer and enjoy the trees and flowers and how the breeze makes everything look. that always helps me destress.

additionally, when you’re stressing about classes or anything else, try to remember that you’re dealing with basically everything you had to deal with in high school, plus the new struggles of living away from home, meeting so many new people and not having old friends, learning to live with a roommate, doing chores and dishes and laundry in less than ideal conditions, and more. there’s so many great aspects to college life and independence, but it’s also super overwhelming! honestly, you can be a little more lax with chores, laundry, etc. than you would be at home, since there’s just so much going on at college.

this is where your choice of college comes into play. every college situation is going to be an adjustment when you’re living on campus, but choosing one closer to home will make it so that you can come home for a long weekend more often, there won’t be huge travel costs, and your parents can potentially come up on the weekend to bring you anything you realize you should have taken with.

if it sounds like this is staying too far inside your own comfort zone, that’s totally valid! i chose a college less than an hour away from home, and i’m very happy with that choice, but it’s also great to go farther away and be more adventurous that way. however, keep in mind that you’ll have that new immersive experience with a city even if it is pretty close to home. i’ve been to my college’s city plenty of times before coming here, but that’s so different from actually living here! i like the familiarity, while also being glad that there’s so many new things to discover.

then there’s homesickness and missing all the people still at home or at different colleges. for me, the homesickness didn’t stay very long. part of that is because i was able to go home for a long weekend a few times during the semester, but even if that wasn’t the case i think i would say the same thing. i think people are better at adjustment than we realize, and that our new daily routines seem to always end up feeling normal. so if it’s the beginning of your college life and everything feels weird and out of place and difficult, try not to worry so much, because i think it’ll even out soon enough.

[itsclydebitches]

How do you feel about the theories on team RWBY falling into the void and spending season 9 in some other realms or something? The imagery of them falling in the OP and I guess some comment about how season 9 will be different from someone at RT is what is making people think it will happen.

I think it would be a really cool idea if this were a show about a huntsmen team who spends their time defending the people from various grimm threats, not a show about a huntsmen team who spends their time fighting a specific war against Salem. If RWBY was in a place where the cast could just go on the next, random adventure, great, but they’re already in the midst of the series’ primary conflict. I don’t think removing them from that is the way to go. Imagine if we watched Harry slowly learn about Voldemort, turn his attention towards fighting him, the attack on Hogwarts happens... and then while Voldemort is temporarily disposed Harry falls through a magical portal that takes him to a totally new place with non-Voldemort things to focus on for a while book. The audience is going to wonder why in the world we left the antagonist of the series, the very heart of the action, the primary showdown, to go on some side mission. It interrupts the flow and pacing of the whole series. Unless Salem follows them somehow — which already feels iffy to me. All of Team RWBY manages to fall off the edge? Potentially New Team JNPR too? Salem reforms in time, goes through a portal, and then falls off as well?  — then it just feels like a bad choice for where RWBY is now. 

So really, I think the bad choice was having Salem outright attack before they were ready for the cast to face and defeat her. The mistake happened a volume ago. We’ve seen now how this choice has forced the writers to come up with unpersuasive reasons why Salem is delayed: she doesn’t feel like attacking just yet, Oscar has a Salem destroying bomb hidden away (we still don’t have an explanation for how Ozpin was able to store energy that only hurts grimm), Ironwood is the real villain here, etc. If Volume 8 had just been a cold emergency + grimm attacks + Ironwood making bad choices, we’d be in a good spot to break up the “Group hops to a new kingdom every 2-3 volumes” with a realm hop instead, but as it stands? I don’t think our heroes should be falling into new dimensions while Salem has their attention and they just warned the whole world, “She’s coming for you next.” Not unless the point is to remove them and have them come back to a dystopian Remnant. 

[turtletimewriting]

Patton’s Adventure- Investigate the cave

Summary: By now I would think you know I’m not going to say!

Note: Thanks to your voting, they have decided to investigate the cave! I know I’ve said this before, but truly thanks for keeping with the story! I know people tend to lose track and stop reading multiple part stories but seeing the same people vote has genuinely made me so happy! Thanks again!

This is based on the tickle forest by fluffomatic, absolutely amazing art and concepts!

Beginning!--- Logan’s Part! 

_._._

Janus managed to squirm out of Patton’s tickles and with a dramatic smoothing out of his cape, he cleared his throat, “Fine, let’s explore the cave then.”

Aw, I knew you would come round!” Patton chirped before running out to the cave. This was very obviously a Remus creation. It was the most stereotypical scary cave you could imagine. There were cobwebs fluttering at the entrance with a hollow whining echo escaping from it’s cold dripping jagged stone walls. Everything about it screamed don’t enter. Janus smirked at that predictable challenge and went to walk in when he felt a hand grip on his back. 

Patton’s eyes were caught on the webs and the embarrassed blush all spoke for itself. “No, you don’t get me for protection after your vicious attack,” Janus muttered as he unhooked Patton’s hand and held it tightly. 

“Not my fault you’re so ticklish...” Patton managed to mumble back but followed him in the cave without any further protest. 

The first thing they noticed was that the cave was freezing. The second was just how many critters were scittering about the place. There was a constant pitter patter sound and the echo really didn’t help things. They truly had just walked blindly into the eye of the storm, huh? 

Welp there was no point in turning around. 

At least the cave system was fairly simple; it was one long tunnel that led to a main chamber. It was no more than a five minute walk to get to the chamber but of course Patton was too busy jumping at his own shadow. It was when Patton screamed only for him to relax as he thought his hand was a spider that Janus snapped, “Why did you suggest we go through this if you truly hate spiders that much?”

“I don’t know. I guess I didn’t think about it,” he at least looked thoroughly embarrassed, “but I stand by this plan. There’s no way they would build such an obvious cave if there was nothing to grab.”

“I agree but we can’t stay in here long. One, I think you’ll have a heart attack if we stay much longer and, two, because I’m freezing.”

“Aw, well actually I know a way to distract me and also warm you up,” Patton’s teasing voice was like a punch but Janus simply couldn’t react in time. 

The next thing he knew was that Patton trapped him in a tight hug and was spidering gentle tickles all across his neck, taking great delight in tracing his scales. Janus tried to squirm away but his grip was way stronger than it had any right to be! “No! Nohot agahain!” Janus squeaked.

“What JJ? I thought you loved some good ol’ Happy Pappy tickles! That’s why you jumped into the big tickle monster plant?” Patton whispered. He was right though. There was nothing better for a distraction than Janus’ squeaky giggles. 

“Naha!” He whipped his head around before giving up and falling limp yet Patton didn’t falter in holding him upright, “Ihi’m still covered in thahat jaauahahahahaaha! PAT! I’m still covered in that junk from the plant ahahahahah!” 

“So?” Patton asked genuinely.

“Ihit makes it more ticklish!” Janus burst out before dissolving once more into his giggles. 

However, as he whipped his head around again, he noticed they had gathered an audience. 

“Pat! Pahaat! Pat wait stop! Look.” He pointed over his shoulder. Now, neither of them could quite make out what they were. There was easily about five of them, maybe more. Put it this way, there was enough of them to probably drive them to tears. Shapes that twisted along the floor to then peer up at them. Now that they had stopped, they now crept forward with eager motions. 

“AH! What are they? Are they spiders!” Patton yelped.

“I d-don’t know!” Janus panickedly answered back as he felt one crawl over his foot. Wait... crawled... 

“Well thanks for that Sherlock Holmes!” Patton squeaked before pinching at his ribs again, causing him to crinkle up again with a shrieky laugh. 

“Hehey! Ihi’m the sarcastic one!” Janus snarked back but he froze at Patton’s face of understanding. Uh oh... If Patton had figured something out before he had then he definitely wasn’t going to like it. Well, he definitely didn’t like it when he felt those same pinches start up again. This time he managed to clamp his mouth shut. 

“No! Laugh!” Patton commanded with an exasperated look before digging violently into his sides. There was nothing Janus could’ve done to stop the avalanche of laughter, “see, they seem in love with your laugh. Aw, I can’t wait to tell Logan that I can scientifically prove that your laughter is the cutest!”

As he said it, he could feel the animal tangled around his ankle stop in its tract. It was now quite obvious what they were. They were snakes. Of course. 

“Wehell nohoho now what!” Janus exclaimed. Patton awkwardly looked around before wincing,

“Well, we still need to look around so maybe if I keep tickling you then nothing will attack us!” Patton cheered like that was at all a sensible plan and so he told him as such (while still frantically giggling), “well mister, can you come up with a  better plan!”

And that was how they started hunting around the cave with Patton keeping one hand permanently squeezing whatever was nearest. The insects scattered mostly at their presence but there were a curious few that sent them flinching away.

They turned over rocks with quick movements and Patton made sure to be extra careful where he stood in case it was just plain on the floor. The unknown draft still whistled throughout the cave in a haunting melody. Janus, of course, didn’t stand much chance. The exhaustion of constantly giggling plus his wet clothes from the stupid plant meant he was wearing thin. The freezing cold only added to this. Eventually even Patton had to call quits. They had found absolutely nothing and his fellow team mate was shivering.

“Aw, c’mere,” Patton whispered and hugged him tightly, rubbing up his arms furiously, “we’ll have to have a chat with our boys later. They totally tricked us into wasting our time, huh?” He meant it all jokingly of course but Janus just took this moment to catch him breath. 

...catch his breath and not laugh...

Uh oh...

They didn’t have time to react before Janus felt a long heavy snake whip up his legs and curl around his waist. It’s long heaving body managed to untuck his shirt and he felt a rug like tickle along his belly. It stretched from side to side and also across his outie. He fell to the floor with a deafening squeal. 

Not that Patton was faring much better. It was a much tinier snake with an obnoxious frilly mane thing cupping its little face with a tail. It lapped itself around his ankles and he tried not to move but then he felt a wiggling feathers across his neck. Snapping around, he startled at the beetle wriggling it’s little feathered feet around. He twisted around so fast that he ended up falling down anyway. The snake immediately grabbed its chance and burrowed its little face into his shoes and worked them off. By that time, another snake had started on the other while the beetle flung itself off the wall clumisly and latched on to the back of his neck. He stared up but Janus seemed thoroughly entangled with his own snake. 

Their laughter rang throughout the cave for a while but even that cave seemed to pick up that one laughter was much more hoarse than the other. 

The massive blue and pink python paused at the taste of tears as he kept flickering his tongue at his chin and cheeks. It gave a moment to think before letting out a shrill hiss and gently crept away. If Janus was even able to pay attention, he would notice it was trying its very best not to tickle as it untangled itself. Instead he was flinching at every move and endlessly begging through his tried giggles. 

Once he was released, he noticed the other insects completely ignoring him and brushing past him to get to his team leader. Patton was practically lighting up the cave with his blush and he was weakly wiggling but the pink snakes did an incredible job at keeping him busy. Janus would have smirked and teased in any other situation but right now his biggest concern was being attacked again. 

He gently peeled the snakes away from his ankles (but not before pausing at just what a cute couple of ladies they were. Probably a Roman creation but then again only Remus knew exactly why he found snakes adorable and be able to create the best snakes he’s ever seen). At that, Patton weakly gave him a thumbs up before jumping to his feet and dragging them out of the cave again. 

Once they finally reached the sunlight again, they collapsed in a pile of giggles. It took a full couple of minutes for them to weakly push themselves upright. 

“Okay... we should assess... just whatever that all was!” Janus pulled himself and slumped over next to Patton who lazily flung his arm over his shoulder. 

“Yeah?” Patton asked.

“Yes. Because that situation was messy! We should have just walked out the second we saw just how many bugs there were!” Janus exclaimed before dramatically thrusting a finger at Patton’s chest, “And you with your sudden ler mood since the stupid plant! We’re on a team here! I don’t think trying to tease or tickle the other is going to help anyone.”

Patton nodded along with him and gave a bashful smile, “Yeah, that was messy. But at least we’re talking about this now. I can’t imagine doing a whole adventure where we’re attacking each other. Sorry. I guess I just got too invested in all this.”

Janus gave him a weird look and pulled him into his chest, “Whatever. Good chat. So, no more random attacks and we will now try to be smart about not getting in danger.”

“Agreed!” 

They finally brushed themselves off and started back down the path but it was now obvious that Janus was still catching his breath and was more weighed down. Patton didn’t take their talk lightly. He would protect his team mate with whatever it would take. 

But they paused once they rounded the corner of the path. Janus hurriedly slammed them up against a tree. It didn’t take much for Patton to figure out why. 

A little ahead of the path was a whole group of bears. They were adorable! But then again even real life bears are breathtakingly cute. You could just tell their fur was huge and puffy and fuzzy and perfect for naps. They had beautiful spots and they were snorting and huffing as they scratched against the trees and napped across the dusty path. 

“We’re not even that deep in the woods! What on earth are they doing here!” Janus whispered. 

“Aww, look at there little ol snorty snouts!” Patton cooed but he made sure to whisper too. Regardless of the cuteness, he had to be strong for his team mate!

“What should we do?” He slumped against the tree with a huge sigh. Patton paused and grimaced as he looked around. 

“Okay, so we have a normal plan and a Patton plan.”

“What’s the normal plan?”

“We go around them. We walk off the path and through the trees.”

“Yes because that went fantastic last time! Plus we have no idea if there’s more!” Janus hysterically butted.

“Well the other plan is to climb the trees and go over them,” Patton winced out. 

“Ugh,” Janus groaned but he did look up to see strong trees that would be steady and easy to climb. 

“I say we go around. You’re too tired to climb!” Patton spoke with all the authority he could.

“I’m fine,” Janus snapped. 

This adventure took 21 minutes!

Total adventure time: 53 minutes!

So there we are! What should they choose? 

A) Go around by walking through the trees

B) Go over by climbing the trees

Now Patton is no longer in a ler mood. But Janus is now tired.