#was scrolling thru my photos and went. wait. what the fuck

[sentientsky]

doctor the explorer

[kunderdogs]

Making Out With VAV

Let me start off by saying I've been into VAV since June 2018 and they're coming to my city in a few months. I will fucking die when I see them okay. On an unrelated note the photos with them are like $40 each and if you want one with each member its $250 (which is more expensive than the vvip tickets!) Ugh should I get them all or do 1? I'd feel terrible if one member's line for pics was shorter than another ya know UGH I'M GOING THRU IT PLS HELP ME

I got carried away with some of the members but tried to keep it short so I'm sorry others are longer than some. ^^' I’m not even Baron biased but why does he hurt me so...I’m so sorry Lou.

Thank you to the anon who requested this. As you all can tell, I have a weakness for VAV so I love writing them. - Cookie

St. Van:

I've deadass dreamed about making out with St. Van (who hasn't? you're lying if you said you didn't). He's such a fucking tease LIKE WHY SIR? 

Anyway, I can imagine making out with him is ALWAYS hot and heavy, no matter where you are. 

He'd much rather make out in his room or your place, where no one can interrupt because 11/10 times it's going to escalate to new heights. 

Honestly, he has no preference when it comes to a "make out style". If you want it short and sweet, he's down. Rough with lots of tongue? Sign him up! 

Doesn't like much dialog when he's in the mood, he'll catch your face in his hands and open mouth kiss you so you didn't get any mixed signals. 

Likes to be dominate no matter what but he likes when you're sitting on his lap. 

His hands, without fail, will always be in your hair - stroking, pulling, pushing it from your face. 

If it's up, NOT FOR LONG 'cause he'll take it out the ponytail

That's on hair pulling kinks

Be prepared for lots of noise. 

He's a moaner and WILL moan in your mouth if you nibble his lip or try to take over the dominate role. 

He'll find it so so so hot when you're rough with him - his unoccupied hand will grip your thigh and force you to connect your bodies fully and he'll definitely grind up into you, pushing your hips down into him. 

There's absolutely nothing gentle about making out with St. Van. 

He won't bruise you but ALMOST.

He'll give you bedroom eyes when you pull away and smirk when he notice how turned on you are. 

Leaning back into the couch with his head tilted to the side and breathing just a bit hard, he'll lick his lips disrespectfully. "I like when you're on top, baby girl, but I think we should take this to the bed, hm?"

(FUCK I GTG HOW AM I GONNA LOOK THIS MAN IN THE EYES WHEN I MEET HIM? IDK LORD HELP ME)

Baron:

Ok my sweet baby Baron. 

I feel like he's a low key freak. 

BUT A GENTLEMAN. 

The first couple of make outs are sweet and precious. 

He's very loving and kind so he won't be rough with you, like never. 

Is so shy the first time, but will initiate it about maybe 3 weeks in the relationship - sooner if you're flirty. 

Doesn't know what the hell you're comfortable with in this new step of your relationship. Picture this:

It's been a few weeks since you two made it official, even though you went through a month of the talking phase. You were flirty, but Chungheop was still shy with you on certain things. Today, the two of you had a fun-filled day at the amusement park. He had been eyeing you with heart eyes all day and you to him as well. It was hard not to, especially when you have a boyfriend as cute as him! As you were driving back to Seoul, the rain came down in buckets but Baron didn't want to go back to the dorms just yet. With cute puppy-eyes he asked you if he could come over to hang out for a few hours. There was absolutely no way for you to resist that.

So here you were, walking back into the living room after changing out of those ridiculously tight skinny jeans and into your pajama shorts. You traded your cute blouse for one of Baron's large shirts. He was lounging on the couch, scrolling through Netflix for something to kill the time with. Nothing was particularly catching his eye though. He didn't have to wait long until you flopped directly next to him and snuggled into his side.

As he took in your attire, his heart was pounding a thousand times a minute. You were too cute! When you two mutually decided on a Rom-Com, he got bored pretty quickly and shyly kissed your cheek.

With a smile, you turned to see him gazing at you. He leaned closer to your lips and hesitated only for a second before closing the distance. Softly, slowly would mold his lips to yours. Chungheop tilted his head to the side, softly exhaling while the arm on the back of the couch comes to the back of your neck.

Won't introduce tongue but will groan when you do it first. 

Heavy breathing and a whole lot of gentle caressing. 

His fingers slide down your cheek to cup your jaw before trailing to your cleavage only to settle on your hip. 

He won't have a tight grip, it's always light but never in the same place for very long - boy has wondering hands. 

Typically they're gripping and stroking. 

Will quietly groan if you deepen the kiss or start touching his skin (neck, stomach). 

His lips aren't ever rough with you 

He'll like to take his time tasting you. 

He's a nibbler/biter so expect him to bite gently on your lips a few times. 

Also he'll pull some freaky moves out of nowhere like sucking on your tongue and smile cheekily when you moan into him. 

Likes to keep you on your toes so some times, just to hear you gasp in surprise, he'll throw you on the bed/couch with a playful smirk.

Overall, he’s very sweet to you. “You look so cute like that, baby.”

Ace:

A whole tease. That's it. That's the post.

Jk. But Wooyoung is a big fan of a foreplay, like this is where he thrives! 

He knows how to fuck with you too, so he'll initiate the kisses and will make them so fluttering and lingering that you'll be on the verge of trying to smash his lips to yours. 

He'll pull away and be like "Uh-uh don't be so impatient, baby. We got all night~" 

Might even laugh a little bit if you were getting frustrated with all his teasing. 

He's the type to dominate everything about making out but it's in a sensual way (?) 

like not rough or aggressive at all. 

Will sneak his tongue in to spice it up after a few minutes just to catch you off guard.

Tongue

LOTS AND LOTS OF IT

French kissing

With a lot of moans from him - he’s pretty vocal but he’s not nearly as loud as you

Likes to suck - on any part of skin on your body. He’s not picky

Sloppy kisses since he has less self control than you think he does

He'll pick up the pace only to slow it down again and smile when you make noises into his mouth. 

Lives for the moment that you finally break under all the teasing and yank his hair.

Ace likes to catch you off guard a lot so he'll sneak up on you when you're distracted and spin you around just to give you kisses. 

He's a romantic at heart so back hugs that turn into making out on the kitchen counter are very common for you two. 

Wooyoung wouldn't want to make-out in public spaces but a hello and goodbye peck when he's in disguise is alright. 

He'll be mortified if you were in the middle of a heated make out session, his hands slowly creeping up your shirt only for the members to burst in. 

He would be soooooo red in the face lol so yeah y'all would have to be ALONE ALONE to have any real freaky time.

Ayno:

(first off, how dare I use this gif)

Has zero self control when it comes to his s/o

As mentioned previously, Ayno is an ass man

So if you want him to jump your bones, just wear a flattering pair of skinny jeans or a tight skirt

He’ll literally follow you around like a puppy

Lots of gulping, narrowed eyes stuck to your hips and ass as you walked in front of him

When it comes to making out, he’s the same way

A kiss is never just one and done

NO MA’AM, he wants all the smoke

He knows you like how his lips are so he goes in for the kill immediately

No build up

He’ll catch your wrist and spin you to face him

As soon as you notice his body pressed into you, his lips are pushing and pulling you to fold into him

Who are you to deny him that?

Doesn’t waste any time with teasing - his tongue is already putting in work

Likes to cradle your head and tilt it up to him

Wants to hear you whimper and moan breathlessly into him

Always likes to break the kiss to stare at you with an intensity that has your blood boiling

But is soooo playful

Might smirk and leave you hanging

Some times he’ll purposefully attack your mouth when you two really shouldn’t be kissing like when you went to his parent’s house

Enjoys the thrill of getting touchy when you guys could be caught any moment

A little bit of an exhibitionist 

He’ll tickle you or nuzzle you to cut some of the sexual tension or say something to make you giggle as he’s pressing kisses on your cheeks

Looooves to handle you if you’d let him

REALLY loves when you handle him too!!!

That one time when you pushed him on the couch, straddled him and yanked his hair, he swore that he was in heaven.

He’ll easily submit to you if you want him too

But he’ll make you work for it

Licking your lips, neck

Yoonho will beg you to let him put hickeys on you and when you agree, he’ll jump on you that second

Jacob:

HOt, heavy, messy, passionate all the time with no build up or warning for you at all. 

Jacob likes to keep you guessing so he'll initiate a make-out just about damn near everywhere and at any given time. 

He honestly doesn't care whose in the room, unless it was like yours or his family. 

The members and other staff? 

Yeah, doesn't matter - if he wants to kiss you then he will. 

If they don't wanna see it, they better leave because he won't stop unless you want him to ;)

Making out isn’t just kissing for him - it’s a prelude to the nasty-ness that’s about to come

So if you try to break the kiss to go answer your phone, he’s thoroughly offended and will drag you back to his lips

The type to walk in, no words, and catch the back of your neck with his large hand

Likes to make out with you against surfaces with him standing up

He’ll tell you he thinks it’s really hot when you wrap your legs around his waist

A bit of a size kink because he loves to corner you and pin you to the wall/bed and hover over you

You...have absolutely no complaints so...

He’s the dominate role even in making out

But just so gentle and loving that it makes you swoon

Rarely makes a sound other than breathing heavily, humming or growling

Face grabbing!!!!!

100% of the time will grind into you

Since his body is always smashed against yours, he doesn’t need to move much for you two to feel the friction

Has a habit of biting his lip and looking to the sky to grab his composure 

Likes your attention on him so he’ll grab your jaw

Playful but not as Ayno

Chuckles when he accidentally tickles you but easily refocuses your attention to the matter at hand:

His tongue in your mouth

Lou:

Shy baby won’t initiate any make-outs until later in the relationship

Probably like 3-4 months into it

Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like making out

Exactly the opposite actually

Hosung loves the intimacy of making out with his partner and finds it really romantic

Is very soft about the entire thing

Nearly melts into a puddle when you kiss him out of nowhere, literal hearts in his eyes 

Light pecks - just lips pressed against each other the first few seconds then he’ll slowly move and close his eyes

Hardly any freaky shit until he’s more comfortable with you

When he is comfortable, he’s still very sweet and loving but will be a bit of a tease

Likes to pull away from you and watch you chase his lips

Will play innocent when you get upset that he won’t move against you

Makes you work for it ‘cause he’s a bit of a brat

His hand kink will show during make outs

As soon as your hands touch him under his shirt, he’s a mess

Loud, deep groans and sucking his breath

Wants to watch you so he’ll love it when you’re in his lap

Lots of slow, teasing kisses until he can feel you grind into him

“Do that again.”

Knows how deep his voice can get so when he figures out it’s a turn on for you, he won’t shut up

“If you keep kissing me like that, I’ll have to take you in the room.”

“Unless you want me to strip you right here on the couch?”

“Princess, you’re eager hm? Mhm, I like that~”

You try your best to shut him up but the more you do, the more he’ll do also

He doesn’t prefer boobs over ass or vice versa but he tends to find his hands are constantly caressing your ass and waist a lot

Is hardly ever rough with you but will appreciate a few bites and sharp grips from your hands

Ziu:

Playful then turns hot and heavy. 

Heejun likes to goof off so making out will start off very innocent. 

You two could be just talking and laughing and he'll strike- tickling you and tackling you onto the couch. 

Eventually, it'll die down and as you were giggling and telling him he was crushing you under his weight, he'd be too busy staring at you to hear you. 

In a split second, he leaned down and gave you a soft kiss - something to convey what he was thinking at the moment. 

He had no intentions of going past that but when he felt your arms wrap around his shoulders, thin fingers stroking the back of his neck and down his back, it sends shivers down his spine. 

Ziu knows how big he is, and he is very cautious of you as well so he won't be rough with you unless there's a special reason. 

Usually, his hands stay on your body, running patterns down your sides but they'll always settle on the swell of your hips or your ass. 

He'll definitely man-handle you a bit - pulling you on to him, pushing you into the couch/bed. 

Some times he forgets how strong he is so his kisses suddenly turn very passionate, and in turn kind of sloppy. 

Open mouth kisses with lots of tongue clashing.

Likes a little bit of pain

Your nails scratching his back, yanking on his hair - as long as there’s no blood

He's pretty vocal, groaning and whispering sweet words in your ear. 

Dirty talk is only for rough sex so most times he'll be just a big ball of love and sensual, lingering kisses.

Then, when you want to deepen the kiss, he'll leave you hanging out of literally nowhere and look at you like you're crazy for trying to get freaky in the dorm living room when any of his members could walk in. 

"We're not doing any of what you're thinking on this couch, little lady." 

Finds it hilarious how sexually frustrated he can get you though, so he'll leave you hanging a lot more than you want lol.

Will probably laugh in your face when you pout and curse him for turning you on with no intention to finish

[myhockeyworld87]

Nervous Regrets - Tyler Seguin - Part 29

Word Count: 4,198

POV: Reader

Warnings: Smut, NSFW, Language, Pregnancy Pictures??

Notes: It’s not yet tomorrow, so at least I kept my word and got this one out today as well. We are definitely getting closer to the birth. Can’t wait! Happy Reading!

Nervous Regrets Masterlist

The beach was completely amazing. The water was warm; the sun was shining and everyone was laughing and having so much fun. Tyler wouldn't let you go in the water without him being by your side, for fear that you'd get knocked down by a wave. Which at first you were totally going to protest, but as the first wave hit, you felt yourself lose a bit of your balance. From then on out, you made sure you only went in just slightly above your ankles if he wasn't around.

On day two, Anna finally convinced you to start your pregnancy shoot, while the boys were out golfing in the afternoon. You'd brought several outfits, along with lingerie, to change into for all the photos Anna had in mind. She started off with some cute dress shots of you on the beach, mostly you walking along in the shallow water, some with the waves splashing around. You changed into one of your bikinis, with cute flowy cover-ups, for a couple of the shots. Moving up the pool, Anna did a few unique shots there as well. She then had you put on a few of the lingerie sets and did some sexy shots just for Tyler in the bedroom.

 The lighting was hitting the house perfectly, and they all somehow convinced you to go nude, which was totally out of your comfort zone. The backdrop and lighting created the perfect opportunity for some silhouette shots. "Ok, just lay there and cover your breasts with your left hand. Oh, that's perfect." Anna told you. "Now bend your left knee up and point your toes." You had your hair fanned out behind you, and you weren't sure what made you do it, but you arched your back slightly. "Oh my god, yes, that looks amazing."

 "Seriously (Y/N), you look so beautiful. Tyler is going to freak." This was from Liv, as she and Jenna were standing over by Anna, as she snapped shot after shot.

 After a few more pictures like that, Anna gave you a gauzy piece of material to wrap around you. You kneeled, keeping your feet under you while you brought the material up to cover your breasts, as much as it would allow. "These are so good (Y/N), I can't wait for you to see them." It felt like you did about a hundred more poses in the next thirty minutes, but soon you were all gathered around Anna's laptop looking at all the photos she took.

 "Anna, these are fantastic. How did you make me look so good?" You always knew Anna was an amazing photographer, but each of the pictures she took of you was simply beautiful. She'd even captured some fun playful ones, from when the girls had made you laugh.

 "I'm so glad you like them. I can't wait to do some with both you and Tyler."

 You were scrolling through all the photos when the guys finally got home. "What are you ladies up to? Because from here it looks like no good." Jamie teased you all as he came over to give Jenna a kiss on the cheek. "Oh wow! (Y/N) these are….wow! They're amazing."

 "Awww, thanks, Jame!"

 "Ok Chubbs, why are you complimenting my wife?" Tyler asked and you turned so quick, you could've got whiplash as he called you wife.

 Thankfully, no one but you and Jenna really noticed and she quickly covered it by saying. "We're all looking at the phenomenal photos Anna took of (Y/N) this afternoon."

 "Oh, I want to see." Tyler pushed his way over by you so that he could get a good view on the computer. "Oh my god babe, you look stunning." Anna continued to scroll down thru until she was at the nude ones. Tyler's jaw dropped. "Fuck babe, these are hot."

 "Anna did a great job, didn't she?"

 "Yeah, she did."

 "Thanks, guys, but (Y/N) made it easy. I need to edit them, but I'll do that when we get back home. However, we still have more to take of the two of you." You weren't going to deny that you were looking forward to doing a photo shoot with Tyler and seeing what Anna would do with the two of you together.

 "Let me grab a shower, and we can get started if you want?" Tyler seemed eager, now that he'd seen your proofs, to get some pictures of the two of you. With a quick kiss, he headed off to your room. You and Anna exchanged a knowing glance, then burst into giggles.

 "Are you good to keep doing this or want to finish them up another day?"

 "Are you kidding? I could do this all day. I wish I could make a living doing this. Speaking of which, you don't care if I use some of these to promo my photography business do you?"

 "Oh my god, Anna I'd be mad if you didn't. I'll do anything I can to help you." She was a really great photographer and loved it, so if these pictures could help, you were all in. "So what are you thinking for Tyler and me?"

 "Well, I thought we could start off here and then move out to the beach and hopefully catch the sunset." It sounded perfect and you nodded, then headed into the bedroom to change and check to see if Ty was ready.

 The shower was off, and you could hear the sound of music floating from the bathroom, with Tyler humming along to it as he got ready. It brought a smile to your face. He was splashing a bit of cologne on himself, the one that made you go weak in the knees when you smelled it on him. He saw your reflection in the mirror as you were leaning against the doorframe, just watching him; and he smiled at you. "Hey baby, come here." It was as if your legs had a mind of their own as they made your way over to your husband; where he wrapped you up in his arms. "God I love you." His lips found yours in a searing kiss, that stole your breath away. "Those pictures babe…. you're so gorgeous. I don't think that I've ever seen you look more beautiful. Well, maybe the day I married you."

 "Speaking of which, did you realize you called me your wife out there?"

 He shrugged his right shoulder. "Oh well, I mean you are my wife."

 "I thought we weren't telling anyone? Especially since our family's don't know." You were pretty sure your parents would understand why you and Tyler decided to get married before the baby, but you wanted them to find out from you and not through friends.

 "I know. I know." He pulled you a little tighter to him. "I love you so much and I just forget sometimes that I can't call you my wife all the time." He kissed your forehead. "Now stop distracting me so I can finish getting ready."

 Rolling your eyes at him, you stepped out of his embrace. "Far be it from me to get in the way of your beauty rituals."

 You made your way back into the bedroom, to find the white lingerie set you had on earlier. "Hey babe, what am I supposed to wear?"

 "I brought you khakis and a white shirt for the beach. Anna said something about jeans and a t-shirt for a few, so throw that on now." By the time you put the bra and panties back on, Tyler had a pair of jeans on and was coming out of the bathroom.

 "Woah!" Just then a knock sounded at the door, which was probably for the best because the look in Tyler's eyes told you, you wouldn't be getting photos taken if he had his way.

 "You guys ready?" Anna asked as she swept into your room, camera and accessories in tow. "Ok don't move, the lighting is perfect there." You'd been standing by Tyler, near the sliding glass doors that led outside to the beach. "Well I mean you can pose and stuff, but this will be great."

 Tyler held you in his arms and the both of you looked down at the baby growing inside you, as Anna snapped some shots. "Oh wait, should I put a shirt on?"

 "Nah, I like the idea that your tattoos are showing." You told him.

 "Ok, how about you turn around (Y/N) and both of you can cradle the baby. Yep just like that." She took a bunch more throughout the bedroom before having you lay down on the bed, while Tyler came over the top of you to kiss your bump. In another pose, he was laying on his side behind you, both of you had your hands on the baby while you looked deeply into each other eyes. Tyler would steal kisses every now and then throughout the entire shoot, and you knew Anna captured the whole thing.

 By the time you headed outside the sun was perfect. After having a difficult time finding a wedding dress on short notice, you'd ordered a white flowy dress for the pictures off the internet. Anna took tons of photos on the beach, but one of your favorites was holding hands with Tyler, just walking through the water, as the sunset behind you. All the pictures turned out amazing, and you knew that you were going to owe Anna big time.

 It was a beautiful night, and by the time you were done with the photo shoot, the chef had dinner all prepared. Everything looked delectable and you hadn't realized how hungry you actually were until there was food in front of you. The meal was delicious and the conversation with all your friends even better. Being in Cabo, just made everyone seem so relaxed and at ease; including your husband. He was laughing and joking with everyone; not that he wasn't normally like this, he was just a bit more carefree at the moment.

 As the night went on, all the couples seemed to break off; you and Tyler included. The two of you were just strolling along the beach in the moonlight, enjoying each other's company. "You know babe, we haven't really talked about what we're going to the name the baby."

 Tyler was right. While you were prepared for the little one's arrival in almost every other way, you hadn't even begun to talk about names. "So what are you thinking?"

 You were headed back to the villa, now just sort of taking your time on the way back. "Hmmm. I like the name Chloe for a girl."

 "Eh, I don't really feel that. What about Madison?"

 He scrunched up his nose in distaste. "Nope, I dated a Madison once and she was crazy."

 "Oh, well if we go by all the women you've dated, we'll never have a girl's name."

 His hand that was entwined with yours, tugged you closer to him. "Shut up, I haven't really dated that many women." His lips kissed yours before you could make another smart remark. "Ok, what about boy names then?"

 "How about Braydon?" You'd come across the name in one of your baby books and liked the fact of nicknaming them Bray.

 "It's not bad. I was honestly thinking of something to go with my Greek background, like Adonis."

 You couldn't help it, you burst out laughing. "We are not naming our child Adonis."

 "What, Adonis Seguin has a nice ring to it." Even Tyler was laughing when he said the name out loud.

 "I like the idea of the Greek origin though. I've always loved Liam, is that Greek?" You hadn't really thought about having either of your ethnicity in the name, but obviously, Tyler had.

 "I think that's Irish babe."

 "Well, I'm going to have to look up some Greek names that's for sure. What about Layla?"

 "Oh no, I mean first off, there's the song and no one is going to be getting down on their knees for my baby girl. Plus I can just hear some guy when she's like eighteen asking if she was a good lay."

 "Oh my god, Ty stop! Your imagination is running wild hun." He was really going too far with that one. "I feel like you're speaking from experience on that one." The two of you had finally made it back to the villa and made your way to the lounge outside your bedroom. Tyler sat down, taking you with him so that you were sitting between his legs and leaning on his chest. "Coming up with a name is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be."

 "I know. We are going to have to put some serious thought into this." He was rubbing the baby as you laid back and looked at the stars.

 "I've always liked how your middle name is your dad's."

 "So you want the baby's middle name to be Paul if it's a boy?"

 You looked back at your husband. "No silly, I want it to be Tyler. That is unless you want a Tyler Paul Seguin the second?"

 "Nah. If we have a boy, I want them to have their own name, especially if he decides to play hockey." Tyler had really thought a lot about naming your child. You weren't sure why that surprised you but it did. From day one he'd made everything about you and the baby his number one priority, so this was no different.

 "Well, at least I don't have to worry about calling you big Ty and little Ty."

 "Little Ty already got us into this. Though I will add he's not so little."

 "Oh my god, you are too much." He was gathering up your dress, hiking it up to your hips.

 "Sounds like someone needs a demonstration to prove Lil Ty's size." His lips pressed to the hollow of your neck, a spot that always drove you wild; while his hands slid up your inner thighs.

 "Ty, we're literally outside, in plain view."

 "So…no one will see. The beach is private, and I doubt any of our friends are going to be stopping over." The heel of his hand pressed down on your clit and you arched back against his chest as a moan fell from your lips. "You can leave the dress on if it makes you feel better." His fingers pushed your panties aside so that they could slip between your folds. "Have you been this wet all day, just waiting until we can be alone like this?"

 You hated that he was right. All the photos the two of you had taken, had your mind thinking about when Tyler would touch you just like he was now. You moaned out a yes, as he continued to wiggle his fingers inside of you. His teeth caught your earlobe and he nibbled on it, causing you to shiver in his arms even though the air was still warm. "Turn around and straddle me, babe." He lifted you then, to help you stand. Right as you went to climb back on him, Tyler stopped you. "Panties off babe." He'd had you so hot and bothered, you didn't even register that they were still on. While you stripped off your panties, he undid the fly of his khakis and shoved them halfway down his legs.

 As soon as you were divested of everything that covered the bottom half of your body, you gathered your dress and straddled your husband; sinking down on him as his cock filled you up. His hands were on your hips as you adjusted to him inside you. "Fuck baby, you are so beautiful." Leaning down you pressed your lips to his, as you started to ride him; moving up and down slowly. Your hair fanned around your face, concealing you both from everything outside, and part of you wondered what kind of picture the two of you made in that particular moment.

 His hips thrust up into you and had his mouth not been on yours, you would've screamed out loud. You ground your hips down on him, creating a friction between your bodies that set your body alive. His mouth broke from yours, "Fuck baby, do that again." This time as you did, he held your hips down and pistoned his cock into you. Within minutes you felt your orgasm start to build. "That's it babe, cum for me." The combination of his words and cock thrusting into you sent you over the edge, and you tossed your head back as your orgasm hit, just like the waves crashing on the shore. With a few last pumps into you, Tyler followed you, as you felt his hot cum squirt inside you.

 Your baby bump kept you from collapsing as much as you wanted to on Tyler, and he must have realized that, as he rolled onto his side, taking you with him. The two of you just lay there getting your breathing out of control. Tyler stroked your back, as you lazily drew on his chest. "I love you so much." You softly whispered to him.

 "Not as much as I love you." It was almost surreal, the two of you laying there under the stars. If someone had asked you a year ago where you'd be at; you would've never said married to Tyler with a baby on the way. Yet here the two of you were happier than you ever been. How long you stayed like that, you didn't know. It wasn't until a breeze blew off the water and you shivered in Tyler's arms, that he scooped you up off the lounge and carried you inside to bed. He peeled the dress off your body, then stripped himself naked before crawling into bed with you.

 The following days were spent relaxing on the beach. The boys would play spikeball from time to time. Everyone even joined in a game of beach volleyball, well everyone except you, as you ended up being all-time scorekeeper and referee. There was a lot of lounging by the pool, with mixed drinks in hand, non-alcoholic for you of course; and dinners were always a big event full of great food and lively conversation. Most nights, you and Tyler would take walks on the beach that always resulted in you making love either outdoors or back at the villa. All in all, it was the best babymoon/honeymoon you could ask for. You were all sad to leave but looked forward to when you could all be together over the summer.

 The plane ride home was no different than the one you took down. Tyler making you walk every so often to make sure you kept your circulation going. The following day, you had a checkup with your ob/gyn who assured you everything looked great and that the trip had, had no ill effects on your pregnancy. Which was a huge relief to both you and Tyler.

 The two of you fell back into your normal routine, him going to practices, while you took care of things at the house. You had about four days before Tyler's birthday, and you planned a small surprise party for him at the house. His parents and sisters were able to fly in for the occasion and after an intimate dinner with family and a few friends, everyone headed back to your house where you surprised Tyler. "Babe, when did you do all this?"

 "I had some time on my hands." You said with a coy little wink. "Now go enjoy your party." He kissed you quickly before he got taken away by some of his teammates wishing him a happy birthday and plying him with drinks. When you'd first told him you'd been pregnant he'd totally stayed away from alcohol since you couldn't drink and he'd only drank very few times since then. Tonight was one of those nights, and as you watched a couple people hand him shots, you knew it was going to be a long night.

 About an hour into the party, you lit the candles on the cake you had bought and carried it over to your husband. The entire place sang Happy Birthday, the smile on Tyler's face growing wider as the song ended. "Happy Birthday hun. Make a wish."

 "I already have everything I could ever want." He said it loud enough that the entire place could hear it and you caught yourself grinning from ear to ear. Once he blew out the candles, his mom took the cake from you so that it could be cut for the party; while Tyler grabbed you around the waist. His breath smelled of alcohol and you chuckled as it tickled your ear. "Thank you for this. You're the best wife in the world." His words were a bit slurred as he pressed sloppy kisses to your neck.

 "Did you just call (Y/N) your wife?" Of course, Cassidy was in earshot and would've heard him call you that. Your mind went blank for a minute, and you could tell Tyler had no clue what to say in his inebriated state.

 Thankfully, your brain started to process things and you found yourself saying. "It's silly really, especially since we're not married yet. I think he's practicing so I don't give him hell in the future." She seemed to accept your answer as she headed into the kitchen to help with the cake. Twisting in Tyler's arm, you smacked him playfully before chiding him. "You've got to stop calling me that, or your family is going to find out."

 "I'm sorry," He breathed out. "I'm just so used to it just being us. I'll be more careful." He kissed you then and you could taste the alcohol on his lips.

 "Babe, you might want to slow down a bit." You warned. "You have a game tomorrow, remember?"

 He nodded his agreement. "I know babe. People keep handing me drinks."

 "Well just go a little slower." You kissed him again, before wiggling out of his arms. He frowned at you. "I'm going to go help your mom in the kitchen."

 He grabbed your waist and pulled you back to him. "Babe, she can handle it. Come and just enjoy the party with me. I haven't got to be with you all night." The pouty look on his face, had you giving in to him.

 "Ok, but can we at least have a piece of cake?"

 "If my baby needs cake, then that's what we will get." He kept you locked in his embrace as the two of you waddled over to the island where his mom had set out plates of dessert. You grabbed one off the counter and took a forkful getting ready to bring it to your mouth, when Tyler snuck in, taking the bite from you. "What..it's my birthday." He mumbled through his mouthful of cake.

 "And I'm your pregnant w…." You caught yourself, right as his mom came over. Quickly you shoved a piece of cake in your mouth.

 "You two look like you're up to no good."

 "Nah we did that months ago mom, that's how she got this way." Oh my god had Tyler really just said that; your husband really had no filter when he drank, even with his mother.

 "Sorry Jackie, he's drinking way too much for someone who hasn't drunk in a few months."

 "Oh please (Y/N), that's not the worst he's ever said, that's for sure. How are you feeling sweetie? You've done so much for this party; you need to sit down and prop up your feet."

 "Awe that's so sweet, but I'm fine."

 "Though I'm dragging her away now so that she can spend time with me," Tyler interjected, as he continued to keep his arms wrapped around you, but pulled you away at the same time.

 "Tyler!" you chided him.

 "Babe, it's my birthday." He whined.

 With an eyeroll, you told him, "You've used that excuse already, but I guess I'll let it slide." You gave him a quick little peck on the cheek. "So where exactly are you taking me in this house full of people?" He opened the french doors and slid you both outside.

 The chill in the air caused you to shiver, and Tyler wrapped his arms tighter around you. "I got you, babe."

 "Ty, it's freezing, what are we doing out here?"

 "I just needed a quiet place so I could tell you thank you for the party, but more importantly, I love you." He twisted your body so you were facing him then, peppering you with kisses.

 "Ty, the party?"

 "Can wait for a few minutes." He captured your lips, molding his mouth to yours, and for several minutes you forgot that your house was full of people. When he finally broke from you, you both were breathing heavily. "I plan on thanking you properly once all these people leave. I love you (Y/N), thanks for making all my dreams come true."

 "I love you too, Ty."

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 7

when will one of these chapters start with ‘wow murphy’s gonna love this and rly enjoy themself’ WHEN IT IS. I HAVE TO KNOW.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

okay i am Recognising this chapter so we’re not quite yet in untouched, completely Feral territory which is. nice. thats nice. i like it when i know what im working w/ but who the kell hnows.

Something nagged at her. A forgotten thing. She thought hard, but even so, it took a long moment for her to remember.

me when i go to my room to fetch my dishes for the washing machine but i get sidetracked by my dog being cute and then i forget and go back downstairs and remember the dishes and then i come back up but my dog is still there and i forget again-

i’m just. rly enjoying this glynda. I SAID IT BEFORE BUT IM RLY THRIVING FOR THIS IDIOT WITH ONE BRAINCELL. THE BRAINCELL IS CINDER.

Glynda’s hunting instincts were primed, the only part of her that worked with absolute clarity, even now.

this is why she hasn’t noticed cinder’s flirting, the fool, the blithering idiot,

In the split second before she faded from consciousness, she smelled ash, the foreign Aura within her flaring until she could taste it: burning flesh and steady decay. Then it disappeared, fizzling out.

hm. is it a callout to say this is. romantic. this is kinda romantic. hey is this? gay? i think its gay. im gonna settle on it.

its gay.

When she awoke the next morning, it was like pulling herself from some great void,

H👈A😎H👈

for some reason THAT was the fingergun that made me spill juice all over my keyboard i see how it is

Then she remembered that at Beacon, her blood usually stayed inside her body.

im thriving for this weird observation. you know when you wake up somewhere new like a hotel or smthng and for a moment yr like ‘where am i’ and u figure it out thru like. normal fucking means. like oh thats not my duvet oh thats not my ceiling oh thats not where my window is-

and then glynda has to judge her location by how much blood of hers is spilled in it. this bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHE GOT ONE BRAINCELL AND OFFAL HUNT IS THE THESIS TO PROVE IT-

It was the room she’d all but dissembled in after getting her ass kicked and then saved by Cinder Fall.

sorry im going HOG WILD on quotes but these new lines r SO GOOD and im LIVING for them....................... like until now we’ve had glynda goodwitch, terrifying unstoppable woman and occasional dipshit. now shes all dipshit. just 100% pure dipshit. spread her on a field and you couldnt tell her from the manure. a complete buffoon.

that said its nice to see glynda using her Brainmess for once... i mean she still wont be able to put an otherwise fuck-ton of clues together still because that requires, the ability to multitask, which is surely does not have, but finally she’s taking five fuckin minutes to let herself go ‘well THATS weird’.

There had only been a stirring of life along those red-vein tattoos, swirling just along the cut of Cinder’s dress.

im enjoying the new ‘sexey tattoos’ slant we’re seein in this remaster it was a real shame they didnt get primetime attention last time.

also glynda Why Ya Lookin,

Hello,

she’d be a heretic to the Law of Semblances twice-over,

I May Not Know My Semblances, But I Know A Bitch When I See One!

For the first time in years, Glynda wanted to set everything aside and rest.

we stan a sleepy bitch................ ugh im so glad she’s finally realising she needs 2 give herself some mfing slack!!!!!!!!!!!!!! because as much as im enjoying the Dragfest she rly needs to. chill.

When she finally emerged from the bathroom, a towel around her waist and her dirty clothes balled in her hands,

look i didnt make this blog to lie that my first reaction to this was tilting my head and going ‘tiddy out? tiddy? is the tiddy out? tiddy?’

look women look hotter doing all the things guys do and this is fact i wont sit down and i Wont Shut Up

No more rushing ahead and getting herself torn up for nothing.

H👈A😎H👈!

thats a Good One, Glynda,

Winter Schnee had the pale white hair of her bloodline, and the sharp features of the famously reclusive Willow Schnee.

YES BITCH WE ARE IN IT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! POP THOSE MFING BOTTLES

i have been WAITING. FOR WEEKS. 7 FUCKING WEEKS I HAVE SAT HERE AND WAITED AND IT FINALLY PAID OFF OH MY GOD MY BITCH IS IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

As Ozpin had said, she was twice the age of the younger Schnee daughter, and her blue eyes held all the acuity that age had brought her.

i made a Sound at this i CAN SEE WHAT YOU DID. I SEE IT. I SEE IT,

A single photo hung on the wall next to a placard detailing some kind of award. Glynda pushed her glasses up on her nose to get a better look. Though it had the appearance of a family photo, only the women of the Schnee family were present, Willow and Weiss flanking a newly ranked Winter.

why am i being targeted directly anyway

safdjhgfsdajgh WINTER,....... im still. im Love w/ this main bitch finally... Finally.... i love winter in offal hunt so fuckign much and im so glad she’s here and that we’re getting more details because AAAAAAAAAAAAAA i love her!!!!!!!!!

also i cant.... say anything because spoilers..... but also............. NNNNNNN this convo has just. so much behind it. SO MUCH CONTEXT. its Killing Me,

A strange expression crossed Winter’s expression. It looked like how bruises felt.

im losing my fucking mind rn diesel and kc are going right to hell and they know it but do they care???????????? no. they already are the devil,

okay i went silent for ages and read ahead because i screamed in discord for like ten minutes and it looked like this

so YEAH theres that, i guess,

Instead, it only filled her with deep unease. Glynda didn't know what Cinder’s game was, but it was becoming clear that it did not align with her own. And the more she thought about it, the less she understood. The less she understood, the more wary she became.

cinder: i wanted to tell this girl i liked her so i wrote her a note that said get out of my desert,

im rly thrivin in this chap i already said it but we’re rly jumping into the meat n bones of the Plot now and its a Good Plot so im excited!!!!!!!!!

“Yes, I think you’ll like her!”

“she’s a lesbian, like you, so maybe her distinguished energy will chill your dysfunctional energies out-”

Glynda pressed her lips; she needed a delicate hand here, needed to carefully choose a response which would divert Ozpin away from the topic. “No reason.”

YES MY FAV LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this is Big Me and literally this is MAYBE the best and also funniest line in this entire shitshow remembers the Pasta Bit and /sweats

i also rly enjoy glynda n ozs friendship... i mean im out here remembering the glynda/ozpin/cinder fic so i was already sold on all their interactions but its rly good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GLYNDAS BEST FRIEND MAY BE 200 YEARS OLD BUT GOD DAMN IT WHEN WILL YR BFF EVER BE THERE FOR U LIKE THAT,

theres a Bit here im not gonna go into but. honestly once u kno how offal hunt basically ends? Its Sad and Im Sad. i hate how knowing this whole thing just inflects on everything else and everything glynda wants and honestly this whole fic sucks. why am i reading this AGAIN.

“I have faith in you, Glynda. But there are terrible things that can be done to a person even without killing them.”

👈😢👈

we’ve popped the first sad fingerguns but also What The Literal Fuck, Oz,

“Come and catch me, then.”  

im LAUGHING this is much better than the first version because this is SUCH a cinder-brand of shit to say dsfjhgfds she’s SUCH A SHIT-STIRRER but i love her,

“She’s just sent me something. My Scroll is working fine, but I think it’s safe to assume she knows what we’re discussing.”

“What did she send you?”

“An invitation.”

oh finally glynda works out the whole CCT business JHGDSFSDF i wonder if cinder knew shed figure it out or saw her msgs to oz and went ‘ah shit well’

BUT YEAH..... DATE! DATE! DATE! HOT DATE WITH CINDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i am. VERY excited as many of u will remember i made a prime shitpost abt That Chap back in the day and ill have 2 REDRAW IT!!!!!!!!! POPPIN BOTTLES!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyway this chapter sucked and was also very good in equal measure. as it is Wont,

[ohmcrvel]

Good Luck With Her

Good Luck With Her  Pt 1 Pt 2

masterlist

Hello Loves 💖! IM BACK OMG ! So I’ve been trying to get rid of my writing block for months now and apparently my writing block has come out of tumblr and is now on wattpad so I’ll probably not be updating on there for a while ( sorry neve)! I hope you enjoy this story and if possible please go check out my wattpad @wckdseb and give my stories some love ! Love you guys eternally! Also happy birthday to the love of my life Sebastian, you’ve helped me through the days I thought I should give up so I thank you more than I can ever explain.

-L ☕️

Summary : people say long distance relationships are hard, you would definitely agree, and after your boyfriend of 10 years cheats on you, you are left wondering if that crush on your team member Bucky was actually just your subconscious telling you where your heart actually belongs.

Note: This is a product of months of writing block, my ex cheating on me, and the amazing song Cardi b Thru your Phone

Pairings: Bucky x Reader, avengers x reader

Warnings: I haven’t written in ages this is shit! angst, a lottttt of swearing, cheating ass dicks, fluff, mentions of sex/sexual activities

———————————————

people say long distance relationships are hard, you would definitely agree. You have been with you boyfriend Daniel, ‘Dan’, ever since you were both just silly seventeen-year-olds begging to leave high school together as soon as possible so your adventures could begin but now, that adventure was coming to an abrupt end.

Throughout your nearly 10 year on and off relationship you’ve both been told “your not experiencing the world”, “how do you know you truly love each other” and “ she’ll/he’ll cheat on you when you’re not around.” And many more horrible things but you two didn’t let that stop your love.

That didn’t mean you two didn’t end it sometimes , their was that 3 year break for uni (minus the drunken hookups) so you too could discover yourself, their was the 2 years you did work experience at a marine biology research lab, where he ended up becoming a security guard without even knowing you worked there and that was where you gained your powers and were being helped by you boss so you couldn’t just leave. Don’t forget their was all the blind dates you were set up on which every time turned out to be him, so it just felt like you could never escape each other so the relationship carried on, but now, 4 years later, it’s even more complicated.

After a freak accident in you lab one night you were ‘blessed’ with the ability to control the element of water, that wasn’t in the description of your marine biology degree though, your boss whose wife was born with a similar gift offered to help you and later was the one who introduced you to the one and only nick fury after your powers needed a more professional approach.

So here you are now, 10 years later from once being seventeen, sat around a marble table surrounded by a team of superhero’s eating spaghetti like six-year-olds and everything seemed good, but not for long.

Last week was your high school best friend Jenny’s birthday party but sadly you were too busy with a mission to go, so instead of the 15 hours plane ride straight after a 3 day mission in Russia your other best friend Neveah sent videos and photos of parts of the night so you could see what you were missing. As everyone talked and laughed you placed your phone in you hand with a on EarPod in one ear smiling at all you high school friends dancing and smiling at the camera saying stupid jokes about you throughout, your laughs soon caught the attention of the team who ended up watching your drunk friends with you laughing along, but the laughter was soon cut short by Sam yelling,

“what the fuck is he doing!” He screams angrily as he grabs your phone pausing the video and zooming in, Bucky and Wanda had gone over to look at what he was yelling at and soon Wandas eyes turned ruby red and Buckys fists clenched

“I’m going to fucking kill him.” His voice turned cold and his eyes swirling with rage.

While everyone was trying to calm the three down you managed to get your phone back and your eyes raced across the screen only to be greeted by your boyfriend making out with Jenny, your best friend. Suddenly everything in your life went silent and you lost all ability to function, your body fell back into your chair and the glass of water in your other hand smashed against the tiled floor, you hastily scurried up to your feet and pushed your way through the teams bodies, you began hurrying into the corridor to your bedroom, faint shouts of your name were blocked out by what you think were your tears as your wooden door slammed shut and your body slid down it .

“Miss (y/l/n), you’re in distress, shall I get help.” F.R.I.D.A.Y’s voice broke the tear-filled air.

“No...no F.R.I.D.A.Y don’t le- don’t let anybody in, please.” Your voice no longer cheerful but now breaking and blocked by tears and as you hand shook your now tear stained cheeks glowed in the screen light and your weak fingers scrolled through your contacts to find that dicks name.

You lifted yourself of the ground and placed yourself on the bed as your phone dialled, your friends waited outside the door, Bucky angrily pacing down the corridor as his anger boiled up inside, while everyone just waited to hear him pick up, and well, he did.

“Hey (y/n) ! I just got back from a shift you alri-“Dan’s cheerful voice was soon cut off by a loud sob.

“Ho- how could you.” Pain and hurt was all Bucky and everyone else could hear in your voice as they sat in the corridor snooping into the conversation like teens, wanting to make sure that asshole didn’t hurt you even more.

“Babe wha-“ Bucky scoffed at his nickname, you always hated being called that but you put up with it for him.

“Don’t fucking call me that.” You snapped back at him.

“Okay okay, (y/n) I just need you to calm down I think you having another anxiety attack.” He pleaded with innocence, nearly causing Nat to jump on a plane to snap his neck.

“I’m not having an anxiety attack you dickshit! This is just the effects of finding out your boyfriend of TEN FUCKING YEARS HAS BEEN NECKING ON WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND” you screamed down the phone as the speaker button flickered white in the darkness, all the pain in your heart begin pouring out like a waterfall.

“Babe...I um...I” Lost for words was all anybody would describe what was happening right and it wasn’t good.

“So now you’re lost for words? Bet you’ve been saying a lot of nice shit to Jenny haven’t you? Oh wait your tongue has been too busy down her fucking throat.” Tony couldn’t help silently chuckle at his gals response, he’d taught her well when it comes to dealing with assholes.

“It’s not like that, you don’t understand.” He pleaded, wanting her just to breathe and let him explain.

“Then fucking explain it to me Daniel! Enlighten me with your amazing knowledge.” Sarcasm dripping towards the end of your sentence as you began sorting through your wardrobe and throwing all his hoodies and gifts he gave you onto the floor so that every trace of him was no longer in your life.

“ i know I know I just don’t know where to begin.” Dans head was full of confusion on how you found out but that wasn’t a good enough reason.

“Where to begin ? Maybe begin by telling me if this was a one time thing or have you been fucking my best friend since we were seventeen.” Your heart was rapidly beating with fear and anxiety as you wondered if your whole relationship had been one massive coverup and lie, you wanted to sound scary and intimidating but every time you spoke your voice just turned into a sob of tears.

“It’s been going on for nearly 4 years” and that’s when your heart fully broke and the team sat out side all look at each other in shock at disgust.

“4 years, 4 bloody years.” You whispered as you hastily grabbed and sat in your chair, looking out at the New York skyline as the room began to spin.

“So you’re telling me that you, Daniel River Fucking Brown was cheating on me with my best friend when I was kidnapped by FUCKING HYDRA!” You voice was more filled with sadness than anything as you hand slammed into your table knocking over the picture frame of you too at prom, the whole team heard the shatter of glass and Bucky was so tempted to go in there and wrap in his arms until this nightmare ended.

The memories of the beginning of those four years hurt more then anything due to the fact after the first couple months you joined the avengers your powers had increased beyond belief, you could now control all the elements and were commonly known by the world as Gardien du Ciel or Sky Guardian and it caused you to became a high priority for hydra, and soon you became their prisoner for nearly a year after they took you while you were on your way to visit Dan for your anniversary.

“Yes, yes I am.” His voice was soft and quite now, like he was embarrassed or something.

“After you were taken I was messed up, I was already struggling without you by my side while you were in New York but now you could never come back due to Hydra And i was struggling to live” the whole team brewed with anger as he tried to play victim without even knowing that they already knew the whole truth.

“One night a couple of months after you were taken I got into really bad place, and Jenny came round when she thought something was wrong because I missed work. We ended up talking for hours everyday for weeks and one night one thing lead to another and it’s been happening ever since, she just wanted to comfort me.” He hastily finished explaining like he just wanted this conversation to be over because he couldn’t be bother to keep lying.

“Bullshit.” Was all you responded with

“What.” He questioned with slight anger

“It’s a bullshit excuse, that’s what that is, the whole time i was taken I know you did jack shit, you never called my team when I missed are anniversary dinner, Tony had to call you to tell you I was missing and he was on the other side of the world! My friends told me how you went partying every Saturday like usual, they told me you never came to the searches and light ceremonies they held, you did fucking nothing Daniel! The people I was captured by showed me the news reports and you were never there Daniel! You never were, and I’m tired of pretending like it didn’t hurt!” You could hear your heart breaking through every word as the flashbacks of those 11 months tortured your brain.

“I just couldn’t deal with it.” Was all he responded with

“And you think I could ? You think I was doing just fine getting tortured and abused? Because I wasn’t !” This whole event finally made you realise that you haven’t even been in love with this asshole these pass 4 years and you were tired of faking it.

“I know (y/n) I know !” His voice full of anger now like you were the one in the wrong

“How the fuck would you know? You didn’t even see me in hospital after I was rescued? Bucky was the first one there and was by my side every night through the coma and after while you where partying and fucking Jenny!” Your heart flutter at the memories of hearing his voice everyday until you woke up from that coma and he smiled at the fact you remembered he was even there.

“Oh god don’t bring Bucky Into this.” He groaned with disrespect

“What on earth is that suppose to mean.” You snapped back with disgust

“You know what I mean (y/n), the whole time you’ve been at that tower I’ve seen and heard the way you felt about him” Dans voice was laced in hate with every word he spoke while the team all seemed to look a Bucky with “we all already knew” looks while his face was full of shock.

“Daniel we talked about this last time I was in London, I told you about me feelings for bucky because I wanted their to be trust in are relationship, but I guess you don’t know what trust is, and i think these past 4 years of me growing to love that man was my heart and subconscious telling me that I don’t love your stupid ass at all and I just need my best friend and the man I’m Truly in love with as the guy by my side not the guy who I fucked at prom and only lasted five fucking seconds.” And with that final comment your hung up, falling back into the bed you just cried yourself asleep, not knowing that your team had just heard the whole thing, including Bucky hearing your confession of liking him.

Pt 2 coming tomorrow 💞💞

[kallura-icedcoffee]

golden hour: elegant

You Clean Up Nice

Money can’t buy you love

Allura looked at the body on the bed with disdain, wondering what she did in her life to deserve this. To deserve him. The money was great, but when she took the job she thought she was going to be assistant to fierce business woman and CEO Krolia Kogane, not sometimes assistant to Krolia Kogane and all the time assistant to her rich spoiled playboy son Keith Kogane. And “assistant” is really pushing it because honestly she felt more like a babysitter.

“Mr. Kogane please get up, you have brunch with your mother at 11” she requested while looking at his schedule from the tablet in her hands.

The body, faced down on the bed, didn’t move. She couldn’t be entirely sure he was even breathing and frankly she sort of secretly wished he wasn’t.

“Mr. Kogane” she repeated.

Crickets.

“Keith” she said sternly one final time.

Nothing.

She rolled her eyes and disappeared out of the room, returning with said tablet and a pitcher of ice cold water. She gave him one final chance before dumping the contents onto his bare back. His screams could be heard down the hallway as he flailed and rolled and jolted up in bed.

“WHAT THE FUCK!” he screeched, staring at her through dripping wet hair.

“Good you’re awake. Please get up, you have brunch with your mother at 11” Allura said cheerily with a petty smile.

“I ought to fire you” he hissed.

“You don’t have the authority Mr. Kogane.”

Keith bit his lip bitterly. She was right. After blowing through several  assistants in a very short period of time, the last one running out the front door in tears, his mother decided to take the reins and choose someone herself to help whip him into shape. There was obviously resistance but for the first time since hiring her, Keith fulfilled his commitments, got to meetings and work on time and Allura managed to keep him out of the tabloids for a good month despite his debauchery. Krolia was thrilled. Allura wasn’t going anywhere.

“Perhaps if you’re feeling cold a nice hot shower will warm you up. I’ll lay out your clothes.” She went to his closet.

“I can pick out my own clothes” he grumbled.

He rolled out of bed and stomped to the bathroom, snatching her by the wrist on the way and dragging her with him. She let out a yelp.

“What else do I have to do today?” he asked moments later from the shower.

Allura sat on the counter by the window trying to keep the screen of her tablet from fogging up while simultaneously trying to avoid looking at Keith’s body through the frosted glass. He was an annoying little shit but fit as hell.

“After brunch, you have a ribbon cutting to attend for the new Olkari Research Center at two, a telephone conference with Mr. Kolivan at 4:30 and then the Galra Charity Gala at eight.”

“Excellent. I’ll have time for cocktails with Lance at five.”

He turned off the water and grabbed the towel hanging over the shower door. After drying himself, he stepped out wrapping the towel around his waist and joining her at the bathroom counter.

“Perhaps you could skip the play date with Mr. McClain today. You know how you two get when you’re together.”

“It’s just a drink or two before dinner.” He winked at her before staring into the mirror to work some mousse into his hair and moisturize his face.

“It’s never just a drink or two. May I remind you of the time-” She was suddenly silenced with Keith’s finger to her lips.

“You don’t need to remind me. I’ll be a good boy today. Promise.” He let his finger slide down her lip, staring at her mouth before clearing his throat and going back to his primping. “Is my outfit ready for tonight?”

“Uh y-yes. I’ll be p-picking it up from the dry cleaners while you’re at the ribbon cutting” she stammered, face flushed. “Also remember that we’ll need to make time to pick up Ms. Arus before heading to the gala since the event is red carpet.”

“Ms. Arus?”

“Your date. Romelle Arus” she reminded him as she scrolled on the tablet.

“Oh yeah, about that, she’s not my date anymore.”

“What?”

“It didn’t work out” he says flatly as he continued to fiddle with his hair.

Her eye twitched.

“What did you do?”

He walked out of the room and returned handing her his phone. She pulled up the text conversation and read, already feeling the veins in her temples pulsing.

[9:27 PM] Why am I seeing pictures of you and Acxa from last night? WHAT ABOUT US?

[9:45 PM] I’m not stupid I know you’re ignoring my texts!

[10:00 PM] I DESERVE AN EXPLANATION!!!

[10:05 PM] YOU KNOW WHAT? NEVER MIND. FUCK YOU YOU CAN TAKE THAT SKANK TO THE GALA INSTEAD!!!!!

Allura lowered the phone and glared at Keith who avoided her menacing gaze.

“I’m going to kill you” she growled.

“It’s fine, calm down. I’ll just take someone else. I’ve got options.” He snatched the phone back and went through his contacts.

Half of the girls where bridges that had long since been burned while the other were the kind of girls you didn’t bring to important black tie events with photographers.

“Hmm.” He pursed his lips. “Wait…”

Keith looked at Allura, stared her up and down, his head tilted, then a smile she knew she shouldn’t trust spread across his face.

“No.” She shook her head.

“Allura.”

“No.”

“I have to show up with someone. You know how these things work.”

“No!”

30 MINUTES LATER…

“Frankly I think it’s a lovely idea. She can keep an eye on you and she’s already superior in quality to most of the problematic trollops you date.” Krolia shrugged while sipping from her mimosa filled flute.

Allura cursed under her breath as she sat next to Keith, both of them sitting across from Krolia. Keith smirked at her triumphantly as he drank his screwdriver.

“I agree.” Keith nodded.

“You’ll need a dress. Go to Naxzela, use the company card.”

“Yes Mrs. Kogane.” Allura nodded, sighing in defeat.

After brunch Keith and Allura went their separate ways. He attended the ribbon cutting which he found quite boring. He had his scheduled telephone conference in the town car while waiting in a drive-thru. He met Lance for drinks and strangely enough, kept it at two drinks before heading home to get ready.

When he entered his bedroom his tux was laid out on his bed with freshly shined shoes on the floor. He decided to shower again and got dressed, skipping the bowtie. He always felt like he was choking whenever he wore one and instead unbuttoned his shirt slightly. Normally he took his sweet time getting ready so that he could show up ridiculously late (and leave ridiculously early to wherever the after party was at) but this time around he seemed extra anxious to go check on his date.

He strode down the hallway to the room at the end and knocked on the door.

“Allura?”

“Take someone else.” Her voice sounded from the other side of the door.

“What?”

“I’m not going I’ve changed my mind.”

“You can’t change your mind open the door.”

“I think I’m feeling sick.”

She gave a fake exaggerated cough.

“Open the door” he said in a more demanding tone.

After a bit of a pause she threw it open and Keith’s heart stopped. Allura was a pretty woman, he could admit that, but at that exact moment she was a man killer and Keith was her first victim whether she intended it or not. He never expected her to know red was his favorite color and yet he took it as a personal assault that she chose a blood red low cut mermaid style floor length dress with thin straps that hugged every blessed inch of her body. Her hair was pulled into a low side ponytail with loosely curled strands framing her face. Once he’s studied her from the ground up his gaze landed on her red full lips.

“I look like an idiot.”

That was not the word he’d use. In fact there were a million other words that were better suited, some appropriate, some not so much.

“You look elegant and beautiful” he bluntly replied with a seriousness in his face she didn’t often see.

Allura’s whole body flinched before she nervously brought her hands together and fiddled with the sparkly bracelet on her wrist.

“Thank you…”

“Don’t be nervous. These things aren’t as fancy as they seem. Once you do the silly red carpet part and take some photos it’s all frou frou appetizers, cocktails and pretending to be interested in dull conversations.” He smiled.

She nodded and turned to grab matching red clutch off the bed before joining him and taking his offered arm.

“You look handsome” she muttered.

“Hmm?”

“You heard me.”

Keith smirked. He couldn’t wait to show up to the gala with her on his arm. People were going to talk and he couldn’t wait.

“You know if this works out tonight I should just have you be my date to all these things.”

She looked up at him and squeezed his bicep with a playful grin.

“You don’t pay me enough.”

[baekhvuns]

Omg an essay on meat eating?! How did that go? I watched Terrifier 1 once a few years ago, but went to see the new one and it's definitely bloody, but I'm on my period, some fake blood on the screen won't phase me too much lmao, but it was disgusting and that clown is 💀

That Taemin x Kkoong account is so cute, but they need to release more cartoons 😭 or merch, I'll buy everything

I think all the 94 liners have to go this year/in early 2023 right? 💔 🖐🏻 farewell bald boys...

Syushshshhshshs but why does black salt taste like eggs though it's crazy (egss and soil). You should try some of the stuff if you see them or can order online, there are some misses but to each their own obviously. I'm always searching for new products to try 👀 naaaaaauuuurrrr, but there's fake fish sauce too! If you add enough seaweed/alkgae everything tastes like fish/ocean.

Oooooh congrats on the fic climax then ajheuashshehehsisuegsagaga, hope Hotcheeks will be satisfied!

I noticed the thing with adding members, for bigger groups it's whatever (btw so many people left/got kicked out this year hmmmmm), but Pixy were left with 4.

Bestie I LOVE BOCA SO MUCH "Hold up yeah, I'm a geek the big paradox!!!!"

I saw that people are trying to blame the tragedy on some celebrities who were apparently there and caused people to freak out?! Seriously, that place is full of narrow streets, they need to control it better, but what to do when the government doesn't give a fuck! My friends are fine thankfully, but they were shaken as hell. On the other hand there are people who care more about their kpop content, fucking clowns

Seonghwa looking extra pretty lately - didn't know it was possible - he's glowing and the hair looks so good on him, I'm a blonde Hwa stan rn idc 😭 and his outfits are slaying my existence

So, my friend doesn't even simp or gets wrecked easily, so this brings me so much joy 😍🥰🤗 like I can't believe she's sending me Hwa videos unprovoked or asking for Hwa gifs isysjshdnsjhajsjshashhs she bought one ticket, then changed it for a better one, because she needs to see 👁👁 and shout out to mama Baek I feel you!

Huh Mingo Mango my guy... he's something

Lmao that rap tweet I've never heard that Paramore guy song and I regret it now...

I couldn't open that Sith Hwa photos you sent at first, I have that fansite blocked cause 🔪 but omg he truly is in his villain era

4 years? It seems both so little and a lot 🤨

I wheezed at the name of the quiz: spirit halloween - good thing we don't have those here, so I'm not dying anytime soon (unless I witness Park Seonghwa live)

Btw.... back in October 2019 I attended music shows for Skz and Atz and I CANNOT BELIEVE I SAW WONDERLAND HALLOWEEN STAGE LIVE LIVE 😭😭😭😭 when will my 2019 kpop era come back

I need to boyfriends so I can dress them similarly but it's just Seonghwa

Demon milf vs cute grandpa

Hold on what audusiegesshsvd Park Sieongwa

Look what I saw, Hwa works at LV lol - DV 💖

hi hello!!

Omg an essay on meat eating?! How did that go? I watched Terrifier 1 once a few years ago, but went to see the new one and it's definitely bloody, but I'm on my period, some fake blood on the screen won't phase me too much lmao, but it was disgusting and that clown is 💀

i was defending ppl who don’t eating meat <3 some ppl in my class are truly ignorant bc they really think there’s no way theres other food that can provide nutrient and proteins without the slaughter of an animal 😀JDVWNDBSKC girlie glad u had ur period iVE BEEN WAITING FOR MY PARCEL ON IT 🔫🔫🔫 the clown that bad?? 😭😭

That Taemin x Kkoong account is so cute, but they need to release more cartoons 😭 or merch, I'll buy everything

IT LITERALLY IS I FOLLOWED IT SO QUICK IVE BEEN SCROLLING THRU IT WHOLE no ur so right,, if kkoongi drops merch like zero im pulling up to lee taemin’s estate

I think all the 94 liners have to go this year/in early 2023 right? 💔 🖐🏻 farewell bald boys... //// Syushshshhshshs but why does black salt taste like eggs though it's crazy (egss and soil). You should try some of the stuff if you see them or can order online, there are some misses but to each their own obviously. I'm always searching for new products to try 👀 naaaaaauuuurrrr, but there's fake fish sauce too! If you add enough seaweed/alkgae everything tastes like fish/ocean.

bald boys 😭😭😭🤚🏼 i believe they have to go either dec end or like feb but kai said his enlistment is nowhere neAR SO IM HOPING FBFBFB,, NO U ARE RIGHT IT DOES IT ALSO SMELLS LIKE IT TOO !!!! it tastes so fire tho like,, god just decided im about to drop megatron 3000 spice with the fire-est flavour and just left,,, iLL DEF LOOK INTO SOME BC U GOT ME CURIOUS

Oooooh congrats on the fic climax then ajheuashshehehsisuegsagaga, hope Hotcheeks will be satisfied!

hopefully they are 😭 40k here we go 😭😭

I noticed the thing with adding members, for bigger groups it's whatever (btw so many people left/got kicked out this year hmmmmm), but Pixy were left with 4.

yeah!!! so many did,, so many even passed away this year its so crazy 😭😭😭 OHHH I LOOKED IT UP A LITTLE ITS QUITE SADDENING

Bestie I LOVE BOCA SO MUCH "Hold up yeah, I'm a geek the big paradox!!!!"

BESTIE IMFVWKHDQK THE BIGGEST BOCA ENTHUSIAST FBWM I QUOTE IT EVERY DAY WITHOUT FAIL 😭😭😭 dami’s voice is so pretty!! even in beauty full <33

I saw that people are trying to blame the tragedy on some celebrities who were apparently there and caused people to freak out?! Seriously, that place is full of narrow streets, they need to control it better, but what to do when the government doesn't give a fuck! My friends are fine thankfully, but they were shaken as hell. On the other hand there are people who care more about their kpop content, fucking clowns

yooo literally???? like what does the celebrity gotta do when the guy who won the election is hiding behind his desk 😭😭😭 NO LIKE DO THEY RLY THINK A CELEB CASUED PPL TO FREAK OUT??? omg i hope they get better soon! it must’ve been really hard to take in what happened,,, no bro some ppl really more worried about the contents they won’t get??? ,,, like u don’t gotta relate everything back to kpop??? crazy mfs truly

Seonghwa looking extra pretty lately - didn't know it was possible - he's glowing and the hair looks so good on him, I'm a blonde Hwa stan rn idc 😭 and his outfits are slaying my existence

EXACTLY I NEED HIS SECRET RIGHT NOW WHAT CONDITIONER AND SHAMPOO HE USES 🔫🤚🏼

So, my friend doesn't even simp or gets wrecked easily, so this brings me so much joy 😍🥰🤗 like I can't believe she's sending me Hwa videos unprovoked or asking for Hwa gifs isysjshdnsjhajsjshashhs she bought one ticket, then changed it for a better one, because she needs to see 👁👁 and shout out to mama Baek I feel you!

u after u introduced her to hwa :

PLSSS FBWMDHSK THATS THE ULTIMATE JOY THE POWER SEONGHWA HAS UR FRIENDS DONE FOR FHFHFH ☺️☺️ oh she got a better one ??? she’s gotta see him in ultra hd 4K 2040p she’s gonna ascend

Huh Mingo Mango my guy... he's something //// Lmao that rap tweet I've never heard that Paramore guy song and I regret it now...

LMFAOOOO NO BC WHAT IS THAT 😭😭😭 WHAT WENT WRONG??? EVERYTHING

I couldn't open that Sith Hwa photos you sent at first, I have that fansite blocked cause 🔪 but omg he truly is in his villain era

omg is that fansite problematic???? ayo??? YEAH EXTREME VILLAIN CORE

4 years? It seems both so little and a lot 🤨

four years and now almost five,,, damn growing old 😭😭😭

I wheezed at the name of the quiz: spirit halloween - good thing we don't have those here, so I'm not dying anytime soon (unless I witness Park Seonghwa live)

LMFAOOOO BDWNBDSK i got this…. in my goblin era apparently

Btw.... back in October 2019 I attended music shows for Skz and Atz and I CANNOT BELIEVE I SAW WONDERLAND HALLOWEEN STAGE LIVE LIVE 😭😭😭😭 when will my 2019 kpop era come back

STOP IT DO U HAVE PHOTOS FJQKDJKW LOW QUALITY I DONT CARE RJKAHDKS NEED SEONGHWA A NEED 😭😭😭😭 nO WHEN WILL THE 2019 KPOP COME BACK THAT WAS A GOOD TIME 😭😭😭

I need to boyfriends so I can dress them similarly but it's just Seonghwa //// Demon milf vs cute grandpa

o-oh.

DEMON MILF FBWMFBAMFBQMDJWK HE THE CUTEST BOBA HEAD 😭😭😭

Hold on what audusiegesshsvd Park Sieongwa

HELP???? THATS SO RANDOM???? PLS ????

Look what I saw, Hwa works at LV lol - DV 💖

OH AND IN PARIS???? 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨 its calling for u to go in and buy <3

….

for the first time panchoa is correct 🤚🏼 if u have pink tape im extremely on my way to rOB IVE BEEN TRYING TO GET IT BUT 🔫🔫🔫

bestie its concert era now 😭😭😭 the youtube lives 😭😭😭

im gonna need to marry this man

got another one!

[sheusedtobesassier]

Day 10,115

001. We’re Brangelina, but he’s Angelina because of their unconventional beauty and I’m Brad because of the fur coat he wears in Fight Club.

002. The day we laid in his bed and he told me about his “one that got away” who was really somebody he tried to be with for a long time until she got hurt in a way that I think was hard for both of them to understand.

003. Watching him giggly dance like animated Kermit with Janelle and Genevieve.

004. It’s the way he smells that keeps making me cry. Grabbed his lumpy leafy pillow, but not the other two ugly tropical Christmas pillows because I never liked those. Mm but I keep breathing deeply into the one. Earthy and clean and unlike anything else. Or maybe it’s the way humans smell and he’s just the only one I’ve been so close to. The only one I’ve ever breathed in. I think it upsets me so much because the pillow won’t smell like that forever. Because I’ll forget how he smells. That’s really really upsetting. So every time it does still smell like that I’m startled and relieved but still so upset. Still fresh. Will not stay fresh.

005. The day Kiersten and I quietly sat across from each other while she drew henna on my hand. I asked her if she’d seen us the other night, sitting in his parked car in the rain. She raised her eyebrows because we both knew she had. She said softly without looking up, “I think you two are cute together.”

006. How he’d ask me “Who even are you?” when I was wilding. He would shake his head and say, “You’re really on one.”

007. We talked about death a few nights ago. I talked about how it’ll be a relief to me when life is over and he talked about how that made no sense to him at all. How it felt so important to him, not the dying but the being alive. How he needed to do something important with it. I said it made him more ambitious and more prone to disappointment. It really explained so much.

008. A couple weeks ago I caught me thinking about who would be our flower girl and ring bearer if we ever got married.

009. Passing my water bottle back and forth 100 times on a drive or just getting back or when he would stop by after he got done working or MOSTLY after we’d messed around because we’d worn each other out. Splashing him because I liked to watch him get mad and have to calm himself down. Mm. Telling him to finish it and feeling small joy that I’d been able to meet his need.

010. The night I just watched him doodle things. He doesn’t draw pretty things. He draws strange things that make sense to just him. Unexpected.

011. His face when he would get sleepy or when he’d first wake up. I called it puffy and he didn’t like that but I meant puffy in the sweetest most darling way.

012. I woke up at five o’clock this morning and never fell back asleep. That’s literally never happened to me. I hope it doesn’t last very long because it’s extremely frustrating to not be able to escape, extremely frustrating to be inside my own head currently. Just snapped out of the middle of a safe dream and right away started thinking about him. Goddamn I cannot wait for mornings I wake up thinking about anything else.

013. I don’t want to talk to anybody else right now. Like actually maybe can’t. Just him. Talking to literally anybody else is disappointing. Being around anybody that isn’t him feels so fucking lonesome. Would rather be alone. Would rather take care of me than have anybody else try it. Just him. Don’t want it from anyone else.

014. He never watched my favorite movie.

015. Got me searching for photos of monarch butterflies as I hold back tears.

016. Mm, about to become super fucking conscious of how many spaces I’m in consist of only white people. So many white people. Too many white people. Damn.

017. I think the whole time we were in love he couldn’t stop mentioning Solange’s album. The first time I listened to it I didn’t like it and then I only ever heard it with him after that. Will probably never like it now.

018. The one evening in the Lodge during the first summer. I was stressed out completely, a low 2 on a scale of 1 to 10. He said we could get in his car and he’d drive me anywhere. I told him I couldn’t because of something coming up on the schedule. Mm but I let him put his arm around me. I didn’t fight that. And I let anybody see us as they left dinner and decided not to give a fuck because I was so sad and I liked him so much.

019. I txted Edith and Caleb right before lunch today to let them know what happened. That made me cry. Yeah I won’t be able to write about the sweet moments we’ve had with them right now but I hope I don’t forget them.

020. Prayed the other night that God would help me protect the memories, like to please help me hold onto them, help me be discreet and not let everybody in on them, but I also asked Him to protect me from the memories for at least this first little while. To not let them devastate me. Mm yeah I’m putting a lot of effort into backing up from the things I suddenly remember about him, about us. Cannot wade in too far.

021. He said my issues with my dad were Big Fish. He might be right.

022. He showed me his father on Facebook a couple weeks ago. A whole bunch of his family but yeah wow we came across his dad. Mm. I didn’t say anything because I felt like I shouldn’t. I couldn’t believe he showed him to me.

023. He loved Fat Thor so much, like not in just a make him laugh way, in like a serious meaningful way. He like lol, he deeply understood Fat Thor.

024. It makes me very very very very sad to think that I probably won’t get to make him laugh for a long time, maybe never again. That hurts. I do love when he laughs hard.

025. When we told Bill and Renate. Mm. Bill started asking reasonable questions, ones I hadn’t asked because they’d seemed too obvious but were helpful to hear out loud. But Renate. Mm. That’ll make me cry. Renate just immediately seemed so sad, like so physically saddened. And I think maybe that’s been the kindest moment of this whole thing. The kindest to me anyways. I love her and I really believe she loves me, loved the two of us together.

026. We stayed at Carlsons’s on Thursday night. Their old mattress on their living room floor. Got in a goofy fight right before we fell asleep because Beans had snuggled into Omar’s legs and he was whisper yelling at me not to bother the cat and so I chucked his phone. When I tattled to Bekah the next morning he said, “I fell asleep before I could be nice.”

027. Next time I order sweet tea in a drive thru I know I’ll cry about it.

028. Strawberry tea. He wanted milk in it, but didn’t take any because he didn’t want to offend June’s sensibilities. Mm. I do love him for the ways he would show June respect. He surprised me.

029. The night he got Depop and scrolled forever.

030. I’ve been wearing the earrings Dad gifted all us girls for Christmas since it happened. Keep putting them on as like, a defense. A comfort. A reassurance. A reminder that I’m loved by others outside of this mess.

031. OOH, the itty bitty whozit whatzits he made out of tiny scraps he came across when he was a janitor at that factory. Small faces.

032. The way he was around Elliott.

033. How he reminded me of Dan AND Zion, somehow combined into a troublesome dreamy wonder boy.

034. It’s going to be really hard to do the things we all usually do together without him. Morning devos, eating meals, prepping/cleaning up for them, and cleaning cabins.

035. He’s just my best friend. My actual closer to me than anybody maybe ever best friend. And I don’t know how I’m supposed to just keep being a person if he isn’t going to be somewhere close by. I don’t know how to feel so far away from somebody I love this way. I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know.

036. He was saying last week that like, saying that his greatest fear in all this is that people are going to believe he doesn’t care about me um that I’m going to believe that. And mm, I’m really trying to not let that BS into my head. Trying to believe he would of stayed if he could of. That there was no other option for him. Not one that he could fathom. But it’s hard. It’s hard to put he cares and he left next to each other and understand both.

037. Seeing anybody else kiss makes me painfully aware that I don’t know if we’ll ever kiss again. An uncontrollable pang.

038. Marriage is now gonna be so stupid upsetting to me.

039. Had to edit his contact in my phone from Cool Boyfriend™ to Omar. Mm, I know I’m Ang<3lla in his, something like that. Wonder if/when he will change it.

040. Waiting for him to reach out to me. Can’t talk to him first. Could actually but won’t. If he misses me he should do something about it. Mm but I know it’s not in his nature. Like he’s more likely to say nothing, to not bother me, to let me have the space I need to take to feel okay. That’s what he will consider it. He probably won’t fathom what I consider it. To me it will feel like him being fine without me. And that is something I cannot prove wrong, only he can. If he wants to. If it’s even possible to prove it wrong. To me it feels like a clean cut, like him seeing this as a part of his life that is over now. I do not want it to be over, so if that’s not what he wants I hope he does something about it. Because if he doesn’t do anything, I’m going to take his silence as disregard. I’m going to let him carry on as I try to too.

041. Went to lay in his Prayer Chapel to mourn his going but once I got there I didn’t want to. It was just an empty room. I told it so. “You’re just an empty room he isn’t in anymore.”

042. I will miss what he has to say about God. His questions and his realizations. I will hear other people talking and know what he might say. I will not say it. He would say it better than I ever could.

043. I read his note to Steve. Couldn’t help it. Said something at the end about how he hopes he can come back someday? To Sky Lodge? When he can contribute? I might of killed him if he’d written that in his note to me. Would have had a hard time forgiving him for a scrap of hope. The current silence is a relief because while it isn’t what I would choose it is what I expected. Nice of him behave how my insecurities told me he would.

044. I’m not angry, but if I am it’s because sadness is debilitating and anger gives you somewhere to put the knife.

045. Reading a book on my tummy while he lays his head against my back and plays with his guitar. The sun is shining and nobody cares how close we are except for us and we like it.

046. The stupid fucking rap dance he does when he’s got headphones in. Muted mouthing the words to something cool I probably don’t know.

047. Mm. Soon comes the torturing myself with imagining what it might be like if he surprise came back. If he crawled into my bed like he’d never woke me up from it, never rushed told me he was there to say goodbye, never kissed me before my eyes were really open. He was struggling and started to walk to the front door then turned back around to hold me again to tell me how hard this was and that he loved me? That he loved me so so much? And then he actually left. And I don’t want to describe what I did then because it was fucking awful and I hope I forget about that morning completely. I hope I forget it and replace that part of my head with a sweet fucked up pretending what it could be like when the part of him that loves me so so much convinces him to crawl into my bed. Holding onto the hope that part of him exists.

048. I read his love note again last night and made it through without crying. Already. Just two days have passed and part of me is already harder than I thought it could be. I’m going to resent that note soon if the silence continues. I’m going to hate it for what it says. If you love me then where are you?

049. Jess just asked if I would come over for supper and I said no. Said I couldn’t wait to be in my bed. She seemed hurt but then said, “Can I bring you supper or do you have food in your house?” So I tearfully said that would be nice because it would. This is what I mean. How do I let anybody else take care of me that isn’t him? How the fuck does one go on?

050. I’m glad that he will not be so far away from his mother anymore. I’m so so glad for that.

[almodovarispunk]

I LOVE BEING A HARRIE THIS POST PROVES IT

rules: you must answer the questions till the end and then tag another 10 harrie blogs to do the same! you can use videos/links/gifs/photos to answer the questions.

heyo my fav bb rachel aka @gayanqel​ tagged me in this thingy yay!

i tag my bbs @angelharrie @dunkirque @iusedtobeabaker @styloff @stilesharrystyles @thightat @thereignofsoloharry @harrysimpact @harrysfashioncampaign @harrysoscars @harrysbroadshoulders and anybody else who wants to do this!!!!!!!!! i love u all 💕💜💗💝💞

Favourite look: so it’s probably the see through rose shirt from the osaka otra show because u know... i love his tiddies.....

Favourite tweet: “Baby metal.” 

Favourite interview (Why?): probs i mean does it even count but the track by track for walking in the wind because he talks about paul simon and his inspirations and AHHHH

Favourite Stage Moment: THE POUTINE RANT I LITERALLY WATCHED THIS WITH MY GIRLFRIEND AND SHE WAS LIKE “I THINK I’M IN LOVE WITH HIM” 

Favourite Hair Style: the greasy fuckin long 2016 hair before he cut it OR any 2014 after he stopped wearing headscarves

Favourite Family Member: anne always she posts pics of her cats on instagram how could u not love her

Favourite 1D Bromance: lirry will always have my heart

Favourite Celebrity + Harry: i would say jeff azoff but he doesn’t rlly count as a celebrity so i’ll say nick or if they’re even friends josh tillman (father john misty) because i want them to kiss even though he’s only recently tweeted about him

Favourite Tattoo: the laurels... forever and always

Favourite Quote: “fuck off nigel” 

Favourite Instagram Post: (tru story i just looked to search harry and my two recent searches were harry and asahd khaled lmao) my fav is his ice bucket challenge because it’s so anti-climatic and also the people he tagged? kanye? susan sarandon? IRVING AZOFF? (x)

Favourite Music Video: drag me down bc of the robot tbh

Favourite Another Man picture: the one i like to call The Androgynous Bitch Hoe Portrait Shot™

Your Name: gillian

Your Age: 19

Where You Live: PEI, Canada

Have you ever saw Harry live in concerts or met him? Any special moments?: no i fuckin wish someday

What’s your favourite thing about Harry: ass and tiddies tbh (and his personality i don’t want to get too sappy i have an emoTIONAL WALL BUILT)

What is your favourite line/lyric of Harry’s on 1D album?: any fuckin line from olivia i love that song so much that i BOUGHT THE FUCKIN SHEET MUSIC FOR IT AND LEARNED IT ON GUITAR AND SANG IT FOR MY VOCAL CLASS BECAUSE I’M IN THEATRE SCHOOL AND I HAVE TO SING AND THE ACCOMPANIST WAS LIKE “WHERE’S THIS SONG FROM?” AND I WAS LIKE “IT’S A ONE DIRECTION SONG” AND SHE WAS LIKE OH THAT’S WHY I’VE NEVER HEARD OF IT ANYWAYS I LOVE LOVA VALOVA LOVA OLIVIA

What song reminds you the most of Harry?: wowza so many! i should really make a spotify playlist (my username is emocanadian if ur interested in my music taste) but criminal by fiona apple, pink + white by frank ocean, diamonds on the soles of her shoes by paul simon, i love you, honeybear by father john misty, favourite colour by carly rae jepsen, higher by carly rae jepsen, scenes from an italian restaurant by billy joel

What is the movie that reminds you the most of Harry?: lost in translation because i just REALLY WANT HARRY TO WORK WITH SOFIA COPPOLA AND ALSO I FEEL LIKE HARRY LIKES THE AESTHETIC OF THAT MOVIE A LOT 

For how long have you been a Harrie?: okay so i was like a closeted harry fan from 2010 like i hate listened to all of the boys music and everything and THEN i went to hate watch this is us with a bunch of my friends and i was like FUCK THIS I LOVE HARRY STYLES so yeah a long time (and also FUN FUCKING FACT on my gf’s and i’s first date she mentioned that she tweeted about how harry styles will be great in dunkirk bc she is a film tweeter and a bunch of harries on twitter RT’d and i was like “continue on... i just happen to be.... a fan....” and inside i was like “FUCK SHE RESPECTS HARRY STYLES I HOPE SHE DOESN’T SEE MY PHONE BACKGROUND” god i love that woman)

Where were you when the first Dunkirk trailer came out?: this is the most Classic Theatre Kid Response™ ever but i was in the middle of doing a show and i was waiting in the dressing room for act 2 to start because i did nothing in act 1 of the show i was doing at the time and i was scrolling thru my dash AND IT WAS THERE AND I USED UP ALL OF MY DATA PLAYING IT BECAUSE THE WIFI SUCKED IN THE DRESSING ROOM AND MY BEST FRIEND TOOK VIDEOS OF MY CRYING OVER IT AND ADDED IT TO HER SNAP STORY OKAY IT WAS A MESSY DAY FOR ME AND I LITERALLY WENT ON STAGE WITH THE BIGGEST SMILE ON MY FACE

What do you expect for HS1?: for my dick to rise..... but seriously... whatever he was doing in where do broken hearts go and stockholm syndrome.... i hope he does some of that AND FUCKIN MORE!!!!!! and to THINK THAT LATE APRIL/EARLY MAY IS COMING SOON AHDHASJKFHALISFHALISJFLASKJDLKASHFKJAHFLJADKJFHASLKFJSALJKDF

What are your tags for Harry on tumblr?: yo i need to get more but i mostly tag #tiddie out bc i love harrys tids

Who is your favourite Harry blog?: all of my motherfuckin mutuals!!!!!!

[0225pm]

good morning! it's currently 9:18AM and i'm so damn beat i want to ko already but i'm pooping rn hence i've decided to post something!!!! soOoOoo because i'm an overly attached gf who needs attention like 24/7 i actually went down all the way to han's place because i missed him hahahahahaha like, initially i was contemplating about it because....... 1, i was afraid that he might have fallen asleep 2, he might not be able to leave the house at such timing 3, he might get mad at me for troubling myself before traveling to his place, dayah wanted to meet up after her shift ended for supper and since i haven't really had anything for dinner i thought it was a good idea to fill my tummy first. so i met her at our usual haunt (the mcds near our place) and asked her for some advice about whether i should go over to his place or not. she was rather against it since it was already really late (about 12ish by the time we reached mcds) and even if we're to uber or grab down it will be really really late and she was kinda worried about my wellbeing since his area is rather quiet with little to zero human traffic at such a late timing unlike our area - we have quite a fair bit of shops that are open 24/7. she also said i must be so obsessed with han to the point that i'm willing to travel all the way there so late which tbh is true la hahaha honestly i don't mind traveling anywhere he is, except maybe if i have to buy a plane ticket or smth la bc your girl is broke (；▽；) but anyway i ended up saying fuck it and just decided to go je because i'm gonna make "go je" one of my life mottos now (half kidding about this bc i'm still a coward and i'm forever thinking about the "what ifs"). and booked an uber around 1:45AM almost 2 i guess!! it was considerably cheap!!!! like $9 for the ride after discount. and wah u know how hard it was to try and surprise han HAHAHAHA i was trying to lie my way through to not make him suspicious of me by asking him to play ml together (another tactic to keep him busy so he won't fall asleep!) and then he got a lil mad bc i kept asking him to wait and wait so he played like i think 3 rounds of brawl while waiting for me to come online hahahaha but hoho little did he know!!! during the last round i told him to lemme know when his game was ending and when he finally texted me, i immediately called him and then asked him if he can come out. i'm not sure if he was taken aback bc he said no at first so i asked if his parents were asleep already and he said no LMAO i was soOo shocked but i didn't rly feel disappointed bc i know that was one of the possibility of him not being able leave the house and i actually brought along some things to keep me busy while i wait (my drawing stuff and a book i'm currently reading). then he asked me come out where? if go out he won't able to so i told him to just come down then cus i'm here and he was like "ok u wait there" AND TADA!!!!! my surprise visit was a success???!?!!!?! he asked me what i was doing there while grabbing me into a tight embrace hehehehe he looked genuinely happy and i'm happy too!!!!! he even brushed his teeth (i could smell the mint) before he left the house so that his "breath won't stink" quoted bc that's what he said hahaha lmao so cute rly!!! oh how i've missed him :') 3-4 days felt so longgGgGgg uGhhH and then we walked towards 7-11 cus i told him my breath prolly stinks since i just had macs so i wanted to get some candies to mask the grossness of the spicy nuggets i had hahahaha but he wasn't even bothered and leaned in for a kiss haisSSssssSss i spent a fortune (ok not rly) at 7-11 man like from just wanting to get candies, i ended up getting all sorts of things - a drink, ice cream, an onigiri. the amount u pay for convenience sake :') and then we decide to sit around mccafe and played a round of ml which we lost bc he didn't realised that his data was all out *rolls eyes* HAHAHAHA and then bc we were trying to conserve both our phones battery lives, we decided to stop playing and that was when i could really look at his face sighHh idk how he can look so good all the time wtf meanwhile i look like a kentang (this is true i have gained the weight i lost hahahha but good la this shows that i'm happy right) and then he went on and said "now dunno what to do right cus cannot play ml alr" and i was like nahHhh it's fine and then he looked at me and went all "is it you bored?" and i shook my head hahahah yallllllll idk about him but i don't think there will ever be a time that i will feel bored just looking at his face and basking his in presence sia like i can't get enough hahaha and then he took my phone and went through my camera roll of junk (i have 12k over photos) so i asked him for the password to his phone and he just went like this ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (damn taik rly) so i kept asking again and again and he just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯!!!! and finally said "theres some past stuff i haven't deleted yet not bc i want to keep them for memories but bc i'm lazy and idw u to see them there since it's not deleted" and i was like???? why?????? didn't u delete them???? then????? then he wanted to unlock his phone for me to let me see but i was like nah u kno what i'm not gonna get my feelings hurt bc maybe there are intimate photos inside too so i rather not look at them and he was like "no there's no intimate photos la" but it was like it's ok!!! :) and then i snatched my phone back from him since i felt like it was kinda unfair that he could see all the photos i have with no secrecy. but then he took his phone and went on a "deletion mode" clearing unwanted photos in his phone while showing me photos he had of me in his gallery!!!! i looked so!!! cute wtf HAHAHAHA like there was a few photos where i actually think i look quite cute and which i've never seen before bc he didn't send it to me wah damn selfish keep for himself HAHAHA JKJK but ya most of them were during my blonde/silver hair days tho sighhhh i rly miss having light colored hair tbvvvvh :( and then he gave me the password to his phone!!!!! wowowoow i never knew that such a day would come (no i'm not being loyar buruk ok hahahaahah) and gave me the freedom to look through his phone (but i never did actually hahaahha bc i was busy scrolling thru my 12k worth of photos instead wth i missed my chance!!!!) even when he went outside for a smoke and left his phone with me i didn't even look through his gallery wth so dumb i could have sent the photos to myself!! but ok ya then i wanted to pee so i asked him to accompany me (bc the toilet is the one at the food court and even though it's relatively clean, the atmosphere was still quiet since it was only around 4+AM in the morning). then we walked back to his place and sat at the void deck - he told me stories about his encik at the station and showed me a few diss track videos between some youtubers and this one really cool short stories videos of which i've forgotten the name of, i will have to ask him later!! and then around 630-7AM i decided to leave the place and instead of taking grab or uber back home i insisted on taking the train and bus bc i wanted to listen to an updated playlist of music that i had synced earlier on BUT LOL WTF apparently ZERO music got synced into the phone and my journey was kinda half shitty bc i thought that i can finally listen to some new tracks but i ended up just listening to the 200+ old music in my phone. not that they're bad music but it has been about 3 months since i last updated my playlist so i've been listening to the same old tracks for quite some time already. but anyway!!!! i still had a great time bc at least i managed to see han today ^^ i guess it's something to get me through the rest of the day and till tomorrow's shift. ok this took like rly long to write and i'm actually done pooping. time check: 10:09AM!! i'm gonna shower and remove my makeup before hitting the hay!