#warbreaker spoilers

[cosmerelists]

Top 10 Cosmere Fake-Outs: Ranked by How Well they Fooled Me

By "fake-outs," I mean times when the narrative tried to convince me that something had happened or was true (for example: this character is DEAD!) when in fact it was all a lie.

By necessity, THIS POST WILL CONTAIN LOTS OF MAJOR SPOILERS!

Specifically: Major spoilers for Warbreaker, Stormlight Archives, Mistborn Eras 1 and 2, and Yumi & the Nightmare Painter. I won't put character names in the titles of the entries, but if you haven't read all of those listed works, please move on!

#10: A Words of Radiance Death

In Words of Radiance, Jasnah is attacked by assassins while on board a ship with Shallan. Shallan sees Jasnah's lifeless body being stabbed, and then the ship literally goes down in flames. Jasnah has certainly died!

Yeah...I didn't buy it for even one second, to be honest. I was twiddling my thumbs waiting for the reveal that Jasnah had actually survived, because of course she did. (This is not a complaint!)

#9: A Secret Project Death

At the end of Yumi and the Nightmare Painter, Yumi dies, and it's a real fake-out. Sanderson goes so far as to have a secret, extra epilogue that isn't in the table of contents where her death is reversed. I wasn't quite as sure while reading that Yumi would survive--at least, not as sure as I was when Jasnah "died." But I was pretty sure. 

#8: A Mistborn Era 1 Death

Specifically: Kelsier. When Kelsier dies at the end of Book 1 (!), I was shocked...and suspicious. Would Sanderson really kill off a character like Kelsier in Book 1??? Well, as it turns out...yes. But also no. Because Kelsier clings to "life" as a Cognitive Shadow and is still off doing things in future books. So I still count this one as a fake-out!

#7: Another Mistborn Era 1 Death

Another character who "dies" in Mistborn Era 1 is Marsh, Kelsier's brother. They find what they think is his completely obliterated body and are like "oh no." Of course, any time there is a completely obliterated body, we as readers will be suspicious: if it's really Marsh, why no face? But I actually wasn't too very suspicious of this one because Marsh felt like a character who could die, narratively speaking. I didn't, like, drop my book out of shock when he turned back up, but I was more surprised than I had been with the others.

#6: Just An Innocent Old Man in Way of Kings

This is referring to Taravangian, who in Way of Kings is presented as a dottering old man who's well-meaning but not too bright. I'm not going to lie, I bought this one hook, line, and sinker. The villain reveal for Taravangian did take me almost completely by surprise! The impact was only lessened insofar as I wasn't that interested in Taravangian pre-reveal, so I didn't feel, like, betrayed or anything.

#5: Nice Guys in Warbreaker

I 100% believed that Denth and Tonk Fah worked for Lemex, were relatively sad about his totally natural death, and were sincerely working for Vivenna afterwards. This is in spite of the fact that the narrative was not at all shy about dropping hints that this was not true. There's the fact that we're told people with tons of breaths are strong & healthy...yet I was like, "Yeah, makes sense that Lemex died of natural causes." We see Vasher position himself against Vivenna and company, and yet I was like, "Vasher probably has his reasons but it's not like Vivenna and company are doing bad things." This one was a shock especially because I liked Denth & Tonk Fah! 

#4: Dalinar and Amaram are BFFs forever

This one runs the risk of being more of a plot twist than a fake-out...but hear me out. We're led to believe that Dalinar has finished investigating Amaram and has decided not to believe Kaladin; he and Amaram are BFFs forever and ever. Then there's a blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment when Dalinar is "out sick" for a week, but I for one thought nothing of that. Then it turns out that Dalinar was in fact laying a trap for Amaram, which Amaram waltzed right into, and Dalinar finally learned the truth. So I think it counts as a fake-out: I was certainly very surprised when Dalinar called Kaladin up "for an apology" and it turned out to be Amaram who needed to apologize. 

#3: Jasnah's Soulcaster

Shallan's whole plot line in Way of Kings is centered around her trying to steal Jasnah's very real and functional Soulcaster by swapping it for Shallan's broken one. Personally, it did not occur to me for even a second that Jasnah's Soulcaster also didn't work and was also a fake, so Shallan simply swapped one fake for another. In part, this was because I did not understand how any of the magic worked on Roshar at this point. But still. It definitely fooled me good.

#2: A Mistborn Era 2 Death

I will admit, it never even entered into the realm of possibility for me that Wax's old wife, Lessie, wasn't dead. We watched her die in the flashback. She was buried. She felt like just one of those fridged women and I had not even a shred of doubt that her death actually happened. I was so sure that when Bleeder literally reverted into Lessie's form and voice, I just assumed she had eaten Lessie's bones. This one really, REALLY shocked me.

#1: Mistborn Era 1: Follow the Ancient Text

But even so, I think the fake-out that most shocked me was the one at the end of Well of Ascension. Vin knew, per the very accurate ancient writings left behind by Kwaan, that she had to resist the power offered by the Well and give it up--even if that meant letting someone she loved die. This felt like such a classic climax and source of tension, that I was just waiting with baited breath hoping that Vin would give up the power. And she did. And it was a mistake. Because it turns out that if you copy down Kwaan's words--which were inscribed in metal so that they could not be altered--on to paper, then Ruin's gonna alter them and you can't trust the ancient prophecy after all. In following the "prophecy" at great personal cost, Vin was just doing what Ruin wanted anyway.

I'm still not over this one. 

[kaladinstormblessed09]

There are people who don’t like warbreaker 😩. How? Why? It’s one of my favourite cosmere books! I understand it’s a bit slow but the set up is so so worth it for the amazing payoff at the end! And it’s just so so good on a reread. Knowing what you know of denth and Tonk fah. Of Lightsong and Llarimar! It’s just a wonderful book and I get sad when people don’t like it or find it boring.

[hauntedfarfalle]

Siri:

Vivenna:

Lightsong:

Susebron:

[l3st1b0urn3s-707]

Ok, Vasher is the softest grumpy man in the history of the Cosmere and I love it!! He saved that little girl and was so mad with her kidnappers (which almost ended his life, bacuase the anger made him loose control on Nightblood) and then he CRYED for the little girl and the situation she had to endure. And he also has a soft spot for Vivenna, I know he really cares about her and wants to protect her. But it's fun to see the contrast of his usual "I don't care about anything/ anyone" mood and this really cute aspect of his personality. He's surprisingly become one of my favourite cosmere characters!

[humanfox030]

No context Warbreaker Hoid spoiler

[tenebris-lux]

When I first read Warbreaker, I thought it was going to be mainly Siri’s story. I wasn’t expecting Vivenna to have such a strong role in it and have the richer character development. Holy moly, but her whole character arc is a fucking symphony, with movements and everything, because she changes and breaks and grows until she’s someone new. Her story was one hell of a surprise because, going in, I thought she’d just be a side/secondary character, possibly morphing into the antagonist for Siri, but … gods.

[protectionsquad24601]

Branderson's decision to make the God King a babygirl is so valid

[brookeuwo]

The Stormlight archive’s position on deity is “if you squint hard enough everything wrong with society is in some way god’s fault”

Mistborn era 1’s position on deity is “god and god’s edgy lover are both stupid and dying and a personal relationship to faith is way more valuable than whatever an actual higher power could ever give you”

Mistborn era 2’s position on deity is “religious freedom is cool also god is a stupid fucking asshole whose divine attribute is “upholding the status quo” so he didn’t realize all of the people in power were worshipping the same pyramid scheme cult”

Warbreaker’s position on deity is “if god did exist then she’d turn faith into a capitalist nightmare where people sell their souls for the precognition industrial complex because she’s too obsessed with making people look cool to make the world into an actual nice place”

Elantris’s position on deity is “whatever the fuck the Elantrians are doing with their post-scarcity socialist utopia is way cooler than what would be happening if either of their gods were alive, also god is a pyramid scheme made to enforce imperialism” (dubious)

White sand’s position on deity is “the coolest thing god ever did was make someone too cool for god’s bullshit” and “I don’t know I’ve never read white sand”

IN SUMMARY:

The Cosmere’s position on deity is:

God is best when ripped apart violently and divided among the people, if god was one guy that guy would suck and would have a lot of blood on their hands

Shatter all shards 2023

[thedarkspiresofkredikshaw]

warbreaker spoilers.

i know i’m reading this like so slow, but my god. the slow burn. lightsong just gave his breath to the god king, which i assume means he’s dead. r i fucking p. i will miss u so much you joyous bastard

[marvelousmagicalaura]

I read chapter 32 of Warbreaker. This chapter gave a lot of unique implications for Nalthis’ history, and the plans of the Returned’s creator (who seems to be a Shard).

The uniqueness of Hanald’s valley and the Tears of Edgli brought my attention. The valley being the only jungle in the world, and the only place where the Tears can grow. I found it cool that the valley is a place where rain is never cold and food grows spontaneously.

And that the Tears of Edgli ended up being used by Vo’s crew to turn the valley into a global superpower.

The valley’s rain and food growth reminds me of how Harmony made the Basin’s land fertile and its weather calm, compared to the Roughs or Southern Continent. The valley’s uniqueness and Tears of Edgli really reminds me of how Preservation crafted the Pits of Hathsin and its status as the only place where atium manifests.

Vo being Returned, giving the five Visions and dying, then his crew creating Hanald, and his wife starting the royal family with their Royal Locks. It all seems like a butterfly effect foreseen and orchestrated by the planet’s Shard.

Sort of like how Preservation used the butterfly effect of the Pits’ existence, Mistsnapping, and someone being a lerasium Mistborn all for the precisely timed gambit with Ruin’s body. Or how Harmony foresaw and orchestrated Wax’s experiment with harmonium and trellium, knowing atium and lerasium dust could be created from it. In general, the future sight of this planet’s Shard seems much closer to Preservation’s ability than Ruin was.

There’s also four important Returned here - Vo the first Returned, the Returned who predicted the Manywar, Strifelover/Kalad, and Peacegiver. It seems like Kalad and Peacegiver were both Returned with enough Breath to be Awakeners.

Though honestly, I thought the Returned and Awakening were going to be much older phenomena than 400-600 years.

I’m curious about the five Scholars.

[theblackknightofworcestershire]

"average Nalthian is a famous historical figure" factoid actualy just statistical error. average Nalthian is unremarkable. Legends Vasher, who wanders the world & is the story behind every historical figure from Nalthian history at once, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

[knightsgaydiant]

Why does no one talk about how Vasher killed Denth with an orgasm? Like it’s basically just that scene from Scott Pilgrim.

[kainekron]

i don't know where this came from but there was some discussion somewhere about Warbreaker being adapted into a musical and people were talking about what kind of songs we'd have and one of them was Denth and Tonk Fah having a song called "Mercenary Humor" that would be like an upbeat intro to the two about would have an evil reprise during the reveal and though i lake any talent for music my brain still tries to idk honestly just keeps going

"It's just some mercenary humor, just a little joke, we play to the stigma..." and then it trails off

[hauntedfarfalle]

Llarimar:

Blushweaver:

Siri:

Vasher:

also Vasher:

[l3st1b0urn3s-707]

Okokok, I'm really starting to like Vivenna. Not that I didn't like her before, but now that she's working with Vasher I'm really invested in her storyline. I think they have a reather good dynamic. Well, he did try to kill her once (or at least he was considering doing it). But at the same time he saved her from those guys on the streets and took her to a safe place. I think he's actually a sweet guy but he doesn't want to show it. But he treats her really well, even thow he's used to be rude to everyone. I think they'll be very powerfull together, and I'm really curious to see what they'll achieve.

[humanfox030]

"Ah. Her Majesty wishes one of the deep stories, from long before. A story before time began?"