#wanted to try this as a “thank you” fanart and a way to enter the competition in hopes of Hori having a quick glance at it lmao

[treloninjaki]

Deku, my Hero 💚🙏

[mooishbeam]

『♡』 Cruel Prince

♡ featuring: villain!diluc ragnvindr x princess!reader

♡ summary: you are forced to marry the manipulative prince of a faraway kingdom. malicious compliance ensues. wc: 3.2k+

♡ cw/tw: afab, forced marriage, forced pregnancy, forced orgasm, hate sex, no foreplay, breeding, heavy choking, spanking, face slapping, spit, creampie, hair pulling, rough sex, diluc is mega possessive

notes: I promiseee im gonna come out with shorter fics im so sorry i couldn't help myself the fanart is so good :(( art by eriimyon on twitter <3

Brilliance freckled through the silk drapes of your extravagant windows and onto your resting face. A silhouette rubs your arm, followed by “You must wake now, Your Grace.” Her amiable tone made your heavy eyes ajar, looking up to see the sweet twinkle of the maid. You sit up and stretch, letting out an exaggerated yawn. “Good morning!” you exclaim. She tucks the straggly hairs aside.   

“Good afternoon, you mean?”  

“Oh. Oops.” She shakes her head and hands you a lukewarm meal. This was a frequent occurrence, staying up late to twirl in your room until your feet ached. Fantasizing about the enchanting gambol you would share with your lover. When you eventually collapsed, you would dream of a man whisking you off to dance in a meadow. Being confined to the limited space of the baroque palace only intensified your curiosity. The kingdom your parent's shoulder is fruitful. Lined with riches and grateful civilians, all you know is comfortability. That comfortability bored you.  

“The king would like to speak with you downstairs once you’ve settled” she states. You give an exasperated sigh and flop onto the featherbed. You weren’t looking forward to this meeting. “M’kay. Thanks. Love you.”    

You make your way toward the dining room after breakfast. Almost every painting you skip by is of your older brother. It was no secret that you weren’t the favorite child. Your father wasn’t particularly fond of having a daughter. You slide down the railing of the grand staircase, entering the still air. Even the sound of your tiptoes carries volumes in complete quiet.  

“Did... someone die?” you say, trying to break the ice. Your brother and mother sit across from each other with their heads down, afraid to interrupt the king who sat at the end of the dining table.  

“No. Have a seat (Y/N).” he says, his hand signaling to the multitude of chairs remaining. You take the middle. Your father looks more stressed than usual, crescent shapes embedded between his eyebrows.  

“There is something we have to discuss” he proclaims, interlocking his fingers. “Sure.”  

“There’s been some disputes... between us. And the kingdom of Ragnvindr. Their king has been ill for many years now.”   

“That’s too bad for them” you say, checking out of the conversation. You know of the Ragnvindrs, but you weren’t interested. “It is. However, their commerce is flourishing. The civilians have an excess of resources. They’re the central hub for wine. If we had access to that, we could provide greatly for the public.”  

“Mm, okay.” Your mind darts to unique spots of detail decorating the ceiling.  

“Do you remember talking to Prince Diluc?” It hadn’t jogged your memory until now, but you recall one time the flaming redhead came to the palace a few months ago. You saw him in passing; exchanging few words in light-hearted conversation before he met with your father. You noted the calm scarlet pupils and his attentiveness when you spoke. He seemed amicable until you uncovered the rumors. Whenever your mother invited her friends, the walls would erupt with gossip. You couldn’t help but listen through the door. “- he tried to kill his father!” Your mother declines but another woman chimed in. “People don’t get suddenly ill like that. He must’ve poisoned him! The poor man can’t talk anymore so Prince Diluc runs everything.”  

“He’ll stop at nothing to get what he wants. Anyone who disagrees with him is beaten. Even death!” you heard the dramatic drawl of another. “Oh please, not with his brother around.” You thought it was funny and went straight to the maid to parrot their pompousness. It wasn’t until his brother died in their home weeks later under “mysterious circumstances”, that you started to take the allegations seriously.  

“He’s shaping out to be an exceptional young man.”  

“I guess. Why are you telling me this?” you ask. Your father sucks in a breath.  

“You are to marry Prince Diluc in a week’s time.” he declares. You freeze, beads of sweat collecting on your forehead. Your heart dropped to your stomach.  

“What? Whe- who decided this?”  

“It was a collective decision from me, your mother, and the Ragnvindrs.”  

“No! I didn’t get to decide. You took away my choice!”  

“(Y/N), this will ensure peace for both of our kingdoms. We shall do what’s best for the-”  

“I don’t know who he is. How could you do that to your own daughter, what kind of father marries their child off to a stranger?” Your voice gets increasingly louder. You were too irate to back down. Your father is seething. 

“We will not argue about this-” he mumbles, the veins on his hands bulging from the tightening fists. 

“Do you even know who he is? He killed his own brother, and his people fear his retaliation. He’ll backstab you at any chance if it means more power. He’s using you-”  

“ENOUGH!” Your father slammed his leaden fists on the table, causing a harrowing bang to ring in your ears. All you can do is look at him, shaking, searching for any semblance of hope. He was unwavering.  

“I hate you.” Your defeated voice falls to a murmur, and you stumble to your room in a haze.  

The next 6 days were vague. You stayed in your room mostly, the maid accompanying you as you cry on and off for hours. Rage burned inside you, it dented furniture and ripped up cushions. You were exhausted and vengeful. An instructor comes by occasionally to teach you for your wedding day, but you find no joy in it.  

You're tranquil in the luxuriant flower garden you once found solace in. A garden you’d never see again after tonight. Suddenly, you hear the gate creak open. Strawberry strands peek behind the sunflowers. It was Diluc. The silence was painful. “Hello.”  

“Hello. I figured it would be considerate to come see you briefly” he returns, grabbing your hand. You catch yourself staring.  

“We are to be married soon.”  

“...Right.”  

“You don’t seem to be happy about this arrangement.”  

“I’m sure you have many requests for your hand in marriage. Why me?”  

“I don’t have a say in it. You don’t either.” That can’t be right, their king is senile you thought.   

“That’s not true. I know what you’re really like.” His eyes narrow into yours. “You could turn this entire kingdom to ash if you willed it.”  

“You know naught of me.”  

“You killed your brother and now you’re after my father, aren’t you?” He’s relaxed despite the accusations.  

“What would you do? As long as we are wedded, you will obey.” You snatch your hand from him.  

“I will do no such thing” you utter, holding your head high. He laughs and lifts your chin with a finger, his thumb softly rubbing your cheek.  

“Such a naïve princess, so far beneath me. You will be mine. Act accordingly.” You want to slap that smug look off his face.  

“I’ll be going now. Don’t stay up too late.”  

Everything about your wedding is opulent. Visitors sport grandiose garments and intricate jewelry, leaving priceless gifts in your celebration. The travel to the kingdom of Ragnvindr was silent, minus the glares you shot to your parents. You disappear the minute you step down the aisle, taking notice of the guests. Faceless people with appropriated smiles and forced words of kindness; a scornful masquerade.  

Your vows are pitiful, and you wear an ingenuine smile for every “aww” in attendance. “I do” is said, and your fate is sealed through a chaste kiss.  

The dance arrived sooner than you thought. The floor was large and elegant, a thousand eyes watching you at the start of the staircase. You almost get stage fright. Diluc waits at the bottom, his gloved hand longing to take yours. You saunter to him. You expected him to be stiff and unprepared, but as you held his hand something changed. He scoops you by the waist with the other and twirls you around, igniting the music. His steps are effortless, bringing you near him and releasing you for another spin. The movements lift you into a different scene, of green pastures and bright blue sky. Only you and Diluc. The tune curled in your ears and whispered radiance. Your stride is loose, guided by the inducing notes and swinging pendant on your neck. Your arms glide past his chest and he steadies you gently in an intimate embrace. Dilucs lips barely hover over your ear.  

“You look stunning.”  

“I know. You look grotesque.” You feel a puff of wind against your ear. Glancing at him, you haven’t paid much attention to his appearance until now. His physique seemed to be chiseled from the finest marble, intentional with each contour. He smelled of musk and bitter vanilla, the warm glow of glittering chandeliers highlighting his rugged features.  

“You like what you see, hmm?” You didn’t reply.  

“Do you like to dance?”  

“It’s not your business.”  

“Well, if I'm right, you can dance here every day if you want. But you must behave.” His honeyed words made you hot, and you looked away. “No. You are my enemy.”  

“Very well, then.” He continued to entrap you, sewing seeds in your brain through the sway of your bodies. You were tangled in a field of thorns, pricked by his fleeting romantic gestures. It confused and enticed you. But the dance came to its end, and reality set in. He leaned down to kiss your hand, his gaze never leaving yours. The music resumes its normal pace, motioning people to return to the dance floor.  

The idea of Diluc displaying you like property tests your pettiness; you need his unruffled persona to snap. He watches you dance into the arms of another man, and you’re sure to make eye contact with him. You flash a mischievous smile as you spin through the exuberant crowd, leaving him behind. You thought you lost him. Just then, shade abruptly comes down on you and the nameless man. He turns first, cowering and slinking into the masses. You don’t face the shadow until your face is grabbed by leather and twisted sharply to encounter the reddening face of Diluc.  

“Have you lost your mind?”  

“If I’m beneath you, this shouldn’t bother you, right?” you say, smiling at your ability to break him.  

He grits his teeth. “You are forbidden from interacting with any man.”  

“By whom? Your words mean nothing.” He gets closer to you; a death stare bore into your pleased expression. “If you’re angry, do something.”  

You’ve never been hauled anywhere this fast. He pulled you through the bustling room and up the stairs with absurd force, not turning to you once. You were nearly hovering off the ground from his strength. He opened the sculpted doors leading to his bedroom and pushed you inside. Before you can see him, he pins you between himself and the ornate vanity. His nails stab into the wood the more he waits for your explanation.   

“What happened to your composure?” you taunt.  

“Who the fuck do you think you are?”  

“Not yours.” His lips share space with yours, noses scarcely touching.   

“Sorely mistaken. You belong to me.”  

“Prove it.”   

Carnal lust washed over you. Your lips instantly collide, cracking dams of yearning through sloppy kisses and smacking teeth. His tongue is demanding and seeks entry, but you deny him. He grabs your neck tightly.  

“Open.”  

“Say please.” Diluc pries your lips open with his fingers, playing with the wet mass while he nips your ear. The foreign feeling in your mouth makes your mind numb.  

“Nasty little minx.” he husks, forcing your tongue to stick out before it contacts his. His kisses are deep and primal, holding you close to the point of merging. He’s squeezing your neck occasionally and teasing the dizzying airflow. The fire cascading down his back envelopes you in a slow bleed, tickling your chest and face. His scent surrounds you, exhilarates you. You pierce his bottom lip with your teeth, looking to regain some sense of control and he groans from the feeling. He promptly hoists you off the ground with your back facing the vanity and his hands on your ass. His greed doesn’t stop, plunging and contorting the organ in unreachable places. You taste sprinkles of metallic flavor. The sensation has your knees weak. You push him away, both breathing heavily with a trail of spit between you.   

“This is nothing like the ceremony kiss.”  

“Don’t you want my full honesty?” he rasped. He dips down to your upper thigh, past the slit in your dress. His pointed fangs catch onto your garter, and he slips it off, groping the plush flesh as he lifts your leg up. Your fingers intertwine with his scalp and tug it, earning a harsh bite on your inner thigh. Rough kisses drag up your body until he makes it back to your lips. You tear his button-down open, navigating the solid muscle under the fabric. Light purple marks are left in your wake that decorate his collarbone. Diluc splits your dress down the back and shreds it off you. You're soaked, relishing in the volatile nature beyond the mask.  

He picks you up and hurls you on the bed, following you on top. You wrestle for dominance, entwined in passion. Somehow, Diluc ends up underneath you, your legs on both sides of him. You take this opportunity to pin his wrists and grind on his throbbing length. He lets you have it knowing that he’s stronger than you are. He kicks off his slacks and you pull down his stained boxers. A sudden fear hits you once they’re removed; his slightly curved cock was impossibly long and girthy, precome trickling down the angry tip. You weren’t sure it would fit.  

“You’re just going to gawk at it?” he says, restless from the ache. Nervousness blends in your gut. You wanted him badly, but you had to make him suffer for at least some time. Hovering over it, you slather his tip in your juices and admire the way he bites his lip. You lower your folds onto him, submerging the cockhead and leave it there, stirring your hips with it inside only to pull it out. Diluc is disheveled, star fished, and spread wildly across the sheets as he grunts from each plunge. He had to feel you, to claim you. 

“You want it?”  

“I don’t beg” he says flatly. You roll your eyes, immersing his shaft halfway. He releases a long shaky groan and attempts to buck his hips, but you rise before he can go further. His cock was covered in syrupy fluids from the moments of friction, and he didn’t know how much more he could take. 

“You won’t get anything with that repulsive attitude” you tease, and start moving at a leisurely pace, carefully stretching yourself out.  

“Repulsive, yet using me for your desires?”  

“That’s all you’re good for.” You’re shuddering from the feeling of your walls molding to the bruising size.  

“Then I’ll be sure to satisfy you.” His calloused fingers break out of your sparing clutch and grab your hips, jerking you down to the hilt with a soggy plap. The wind is knocked out of you, shockwaves through your spine as you heaved over trembling. It hurts, but you can’t help but feel aroused by the desperate look he gave you. “Mm good, you’re sucking me so tight.”   

“Shit- slow down-” you plead. He wraps his arms around your hips, arching your back and leaning you forward. “Quiet.” Diluc bends his knees and begins to bully his way into your cunt.  His thrusts are unforgiving, if he wasn’t holding you in place, you’d be airborne. He slips out completely and rams into you so deep it feels like he's burrowing into your stomach; yet you grip him like a vice, hungry for more. You were melting and all you heard was his quick beating heart and the wet squelching clash of your bodies. Diluc shifts to the vanity mirror opposite the bed, entranced by the violent rippling of your ass and sticky strings your puffy vulva left. You’re teeming on an orgasm, blurring the lines of pleasure and pain. 

“I’m gonna come- ah!” His hands move to your ass, striking each side hard enough to welt numerous times. He digs his nails into the searing flesh, savoring it. “Louder, I want everyone to know who owns you” he says and pushes his fingers in your mouth to pull your jaw slack. You deliver, allowing your erotic wails to echo through the halls. “Come for me princess.” His command sends you over the edge and you’re dissolved into pleasure, zeroing in on his guttural moans, the low fuck’s stuttering out of him. Your nails score his chest. He spreads your backside, enjoying the view of your convulsing heat drenching his balls.  

Diluc flips you over on your back before you’re done gathering yourself. He tosses the damp shirt on the floor and reveals the crisp v-line deliciously carved under his sculpted abs. He manhandles you into a pretzel, securing your sore thighs. He puts his hands on yours and pushes them back further. “Fucking filthy, you’re such a mess” he says, smearing his leaking shaft up and down your hypersensitive clit. He quickly engulfs himself in your gooey warmth again and sighs. “You’re beautiful like this.” He’s pounding hard, foreheads touching and breath mixing. You’re both sweating, mascara running down your cheeks and needy moans leaving either of you from addictive ecstasy. His tip licks your sweet spot consistently and your eyes loll back. “That’s it, take my cock like a good wife.” One hand reaches for your throat while the other flicks your clit rapidly. The firm grip dots your vision black, and you pulse from sick delight. He stops occasionally to slap you across your face. It stings, you hate him, but the spasming veins caressing your walls make you question that belief. “Oh my god - look at you” he moans, staring at the shiny white ring forming at the base of his thrusts. Your hands find passage in his thick tresses and guide his attention to you. The coil threatened to snap at any minute. “Gonna carry my baby, then you can never leave.”  

Your blood runs cold. “Huh? Wait-” You try to budge but he’s stronger than you, sweeping the nub faster with ravenous strokes. Electricity consumes your rational thoughts with a thumping finish, cloudy and fluttering. “Ngh- you’ll look so pretty with a belly” Diluc groans and chases his high. His eyes are glossed over, he throws his head back and finally falls apart, creamy ropes coating your insides with his balls flush against you. He pants as if he’s moved mountains and twitches from slow strokes, trying to get his come as deep in you as possible. His thumb presses upon your lips and you instinctively open your mouth. Spit settles on your tongue and he watches you swallow. You taste his kiss right after. When he pulls out, globs of semen dribble out your slit, but he fingers it back inside.   

“Keep it in” he says darkly. He glances at the pendant you’re still wearing—an invaluable heirloom from your parents—and snatches the chain off your neck. In one devastating hurl, he shatters it on the floor. “I’ll make sure you only have me.” 

[eatmeandbirthmeagain]

Hello there^^

I saw that your requests are open so i wanted to give it a try. There are a lot of fics that show the reader and baldwin being in a relationship or it slowly developing into such. But i dont really see any fics containing what it was like before the romantic aspects ensued.

Which gave me idea of wanting a story about how the reader and baldwin met. I think it would be adorable to see how little reader and little baldwin got along with eachother platonically before realizing that they both love eachother in a different and more intimate way than they already do hehe.

Also, i wanted to say that i love your work. And i really appreciate the amazing people who make fanart, fanfics, and a lot of many other different content for this little fandom. Like you!

Thank you for blessing us with our daily bread and i hope you take care of yourself and have a great day!

♡ The Fireflies - King Baldwin x Reader ♡

♡ Fuff ♡

A/N: Hello Hana! This is such a cute request, thank you for your love and support 🫶. I hope this is what you had in mind! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figures. Enjoy!

TW: Leprosy

Baldwin was nine when he was diagnosed with leprosy.

He was sixteen when he left for battle.

He was twenty when his disease got so severe he was required to wear a mask.

And of all people in his life, it was y/n who was by his side for every single moment. His best friend then wife.

She was outside the royal chambers as the physicians worked on him for the first time, poking and prodding his body with cold metal instruments to test if their fears were true.

She was the one who kissed his forehead before he left for battle.

She was the one who missed his smile the very most when it was replaced with a cold, iron mask.

They were both so young when their worst nightmare came true.

-----------------------

It was early morning when the young boys played in the castle courtyard. Each of them only children.

Y/n sat off to the side in the grass with Sybila, watching the boys play.

The two girls made chains with wildflowers that stuck up out of the grass in abundance while the boys played with pretend swords and shields.

Unbeknownst to y/n, Baldwin watched her from a distance. She looked so pretty sitting there in the grass, her hair spilling around her shoulders, framing her face just right.

“OOOOH BALDWIN HAS A CRUSHHH!” one of the young boys taunted from behind him. “I DO NOT!” he yelled back, striking the boy with the wooden sword, using all his strength.

The boy hit back and in an attempt to block his attack, Baldwin's arm was sliced open with the sharpened wood of the sword. Blood trickled down his arm, hitting the ground in small beads. But he took no notice of this, striking the other boy in the head, knocking him to the ground.

It wasn't until a loud shriek from one of the other boys at the large gash on his arm that he noticed the blood. One of the boys ran off to alert an adult as Baldwin stared at his arm in disbelief.

Sybila ran to her brother and y/n followed to help him inside. Oddly enough, he did not feel any pain.

----------------

When he was taken to the physicians, y/n waited with his sister anxiously, fearing the worst. It had been noted instantly that Baldwin had felt no pain from the wound and this sparked the attention of many.

Soon, the news spread around the castle about the boy's recent diagnosis.

Y/n was permitted from seeing him for the remainder of the day as the physicians worked to ensure that their fears were in fact correct. 

-----------------

By nightfall, y/n was fed up with waiting. She left her chambers and headed silently down the hall to his rooms.

When she eventually reached the large wooden doors, she knocked softly in a pattern that the two had decided would be their “secret code”, so they knew who was at the door.

“Come in” a small, broken voice called out.

Y/n entered to find the boy sitting on his bed, tears stained his cheeks and he looked very tired. “Blondie, are you okay? What's wrong?” she said with worry, her kind yet urgent voice calmed the young boy's heart just a little, as did the nickname she had given him a few years priour.

“I.. I don't know” he muttered as she sat down beside him. The girl wrapped an arm around his shoulder, pulling him close to her. “They haven't told me anything… y/n, am I dying?” he looked up at her, his blue eyes that usually sparkled, were filled with tears and fear.

“You're not dying, I'm sure you will be okay” she gave him a small smile. The boy shrugged and rested his head on his friend's shoulder.

Just then, the girl had an idea. “Hey, why don't you come to my chambers for the night? We could have a sleepover, it would be really fun!” she grinned cheerfully, standing from the bed and offering a hand for him to take. Baldwin's eyes lit up at the idea.

“Yeah that sounds fun!” his voice sounded less broken now. He wiped his eyes and stood up to follow his friend. Taking her hand, they walked as quietly as they could back to the girls chambers. 

------------------

Once inside, they stripped all the covers off y/n’s bed, pushed two couches closer together and draped sheets over the top to create a small cave, just big enough for them to fit inside.

They decorated it with pillows and blankets to make a bed, and finally they were finished.

The two crawled inside and laid down next to each other, giggling at their work. “You were right, this is fun!” Baldwin said, turning to look at y/n with the crooked grin that she loved so much, plastered to his face.

“Yeah, I hope you feel better now” she replied with a smile. The boy nodded, taking a second to admire how pretty she was before speaking again.

“Hey, do you want to hear a scary story?” he said with a smirk. Y/n giggled and nodded, sitting up in preperation.

They stayed up late that night, sharing stories of witches and the undead, scaring each other and giggling at each other's terrified faces until they fell asleep during the early hours of the morning.

-----------------

Y/n was the first to wake.

Her eyes blinked open slowly and she stretched as her body came awake. She smiled as the memories from the night priour came back to her.

Turning onto her side, she saw her friend still sprawled out beside her, sleeping soundly.

Quietly as possible so as to not wake him, she crept out of their makeshift home to get dressed.

Once she was dressed for the day with her hair brushed, she crawled back into the fort to wake Baldwin. She shook his shoulder gently, “blondie, wake up! Its morning now!” she whispered, grinning when he shifted.

Baldwin groaned and opened his eyes, just enough too see her. “Y/n its too earlyyy” he whined, pulling the covers over his face.

“Come on sleepy head its time to get up!” the girl giggled, prodding his shoulder. Begrudgingly, the boy sat up as y/n pulled his arm to drag him out of the fort.

Once he was dressed as well, the two went to the dining room for breakfast.

The day proceeded as usal.

Baldwin carried on with his royal duties as prince, putting the diagnosis in the back of his mind. That was until night fell again and his fathers physicians came to his chambers to check on him.

As the cold, metal instruments poked at his arms and legs, he caught himself wishing that y/n was there to comfort him with a silly joke or a story.

When the men left his room, he finally allowed himself to cry.

He cried for a long time in the cold, dimly lit room.

Was he really going to die? A thousand questions flooded his mind. “Am I really going to die so young? Will I never get married or have children? Will I never get old enough to be king? What will-” a knock came from the wooden door, snapping him out of his thoughts.

But this was not just any knock, it was the secret code that y/n had come up with.

He wiped his tears quickly and called for her to come in. The girl hurried into the room, closing the door behind her.

“Blondie, come quick, you need to see this!” she sounded exited and was fully dressed in a warm looking cloke and day clothes, she also carried a candle stick with her .

The boy did not heasetate to get out of bed and put on his shoes to follow.

As quietly as they could, they crept down the hallway and outside to the castle courtyard.

“Y/n, slow down, where are we going?!” the boy called out too her.

“Just hurry, you dont want to miss this!” she replied, taking his hand to lead him.

Eventually, the two reached the small pond in the castle courtyard that the children were forbidden from going near.

“Y/n, we are not supposed to play by the water! My mother said its dangerous!” Baldwin whispered urgently.

“Stop being such a baby, look at this!” with that, the girl put licked her fingers and put out the candle, plunging the two into darkness.

Or what would have been darkness if it wasnt for the thousands of fireflies that swarmed the pond. The boy was lost for words.

“Theyre beautiful arent they?” y/n said softly, sitting down on the grass. “Yes.. they are wonderful” he replied, joining her on the grass.

The girl chuckled, “are you glad you trusted me now?” she said, moving closer too him.

A grin spread across Baldwin’s face, “yes, this is amazing” he replied, his eyes not leaving the pond and the hundreds of tiny glowing lights.

--------------------

The moment was beautiful and something the two of them would remember for years into the future.

In times of pain, one would often whisper to the other, “remeber the fireflies my love” and the memories would come back to defeat whatever agony plagued the two, as a symbol of their ever lasting love for eachother.

[mrabubu]

Ok so I just enter to Tumblr and the first thing I see are hate comments for a post?...

I honestly loved what you did, I'm relatively new to the fandom and the first thing I saw about Leo was Leosagi fanarts which confused me because they're not even in the same series?... But people defended it so much that I thought that was a normal ship that the entire fandom liked and that's why I would have to get used to it, then I find out your blog and I'm so in love with the way you portray Leo with y/n it means a lot to me! So, in short: thanks for speaking up about it and I just really love your drawings and animations ✨

Thank you, I appreciate your words ~

But, honestly, this is scary to see how much some people downplay Leo and his personality to just him being gay (when he's not and his personality and character arc are MUCH more than that) and deceive others into thinking leosagi is canon... I saw other case like this, and I myself at some point though it was something until I checked everything and realised that, no, it's all just headcanon that some really forcing into others and even creators themselves.

I hope you don't mind if I leave some of my thoughts on this ship under your ask, but I've watched the first episode of Usagi Chronicles because I wanted to a) see what all the fuss is about, b) try not to make people think I'm critical when I haven't even watched the show. I'm going to leave my thoughts below, so, if people want, they can read them. If not, then, please, don't. Those are my personal experience. If you like leosagi and want to continue ship it, do it. It's not my business. Under the line I'll be talking mostly about those people who, again, forcing this ship into fans and creators.

So, I watched that first episode while my friend watched the whole series, and, honestly, my thoughts were "huh..?". Like, Usagi to me felt like diet Leo. They're basically have the same personality, but Usagi is less charismatic and even annoying... Leo to some is also annoying, but he still has his charms and strategic mind. And from what I've heard, even by the end of the season 2 Usagi stays pretty much the same. Honestly, I don't see how this ship can work without heavy fanoning both characters. I wouldn't be surprised if many aggressive shippers haven't even watched Usagi Chronicles and ship leosagi because: a) they need to ship Leo with a male and Yuichi is an easy choice, b) they just look cute together. Because if past movie Leo would meet past season 2 Usagi they wouldn't stand each other. And in a relationship they would get bored of each other pretty quickly, because there would be no dynamic or chemistry. Good friends? Maybe. Partners? No.

I'm not going to talk about Miyamoto because as far as I know he has a canonical love interest and a child.

And all this led me to a question: is THIS what people want...? For creators to butcher a character so they could have their fanservice?

[vanillaavengerlings]

To all Fanfic/fanart/ fandom content writers/creators/artists/anyone creating fandom content

As we enter the week of 22 July, I wanted to write something hopeful for any writers, artists and content creators out there, because let’s face it, things happening around the world is so grim and most of us are trying to survive the days. 

So, here’s something hopeful for any of you who need this.😄

Please reblog this as much as you can as I would love for fandom writers/creators/artists and for fanfic readers to read this. 

Thank you!

A small background about me - I write fanfics, mostly in the Avengers/Stony fandoms. And it’s what I’ve been doing mostly for a few years, despite schooling and transitioning to work.

It’s my escape from reality. When things get rough, I start writing. Writing fanfictions gives me comfort because I know the characters and I love them, so I feel safe in a way and it’s stress relieving for me.

In 2018, I had to attend a compulsory internship so that I could get my diploma and graduate. My course offered a few positions and one of them was writing for television programs at a well known media company in my country. 

I wanted that job so bad because I wasn’t interested in the others, they were too ‘corporate-like’. So I applied for it. They asked for my portfolio of written works.

And then it hit me. My God, all I’ve written so far were fanfics with male pairing. I come from a conservative country so LGBTQ stories are super rare and can be frowned upon. But that’s all I had and it was all I could submit.

Guess what?

I did just that. I took excerpts from my WIP/published fanfics, and added them into my portfolio. I even went the extra mile and typed a short excerpt into a screenwriting format, like a legit script for a show! (TV writing internships pay special attention to your script writing abilities)

I submitted them.

I was called for an interview a few days later. I was advised to bring hardcopy versions of my written work, so I printed out the stuff from my portfolio. I went for the interview and saw my coursemates, some of whom I consider really capable and smart. 

I thought, there’s no way my fanfics and I stand a chance in getting this job.

I went up first and had the usual interview questions. The last bit came, where the interviewer, a prominent executive producer in my country, asked for my written samples. I handed her the file and gave her a brief explanation of my work.

I told her I published my written works online and have a group of audience who read and review them. I also added that I use their feedback to improve my writing as a whole. She was nodding her head and reading the script of my fanfic I had written. I was hiding my smile. Everything she was flipping through were Stony and Avengers fanfic excerpts!

At last, she handed my file back to me and smiled. It signaled the end of my interview. I went back to my campus and sighed, already looking at the other positions to apply to.

Two hours later, I received the email that I had gotten the job, as a television writer intern at a prominent media company. And all I used were my fanfictions I had written!

I couldn’t believe it worked. My fellow coursemates write really good content and I went into the interview with fanfictions and got the job!

To this day, when I think about this, I laugh. Not in a self-deprecating way, but in a way of disbelief, seeing what I can pull off.

To everyone out there who are thinking so lowly of yourself because all you have done are work related to fandoms, I’ve been there, and I’m here to say that you are so talented coming up with unique content from something that is so fixed and rigid. So don’t be hard on yourself. 

You’re not wasting your time just because you post stuff on AO3 or Tumblr. Every written work/art/creative content is a great way for you to practice and work on your skills. I mean, we all have to start somewhere, right?

Seriously, it takes a lot of talent, creativity and hard work to write fanfictions, draw fanarts and create any fandom related content. And it takes so much of courage to put your work out there in the open for anyone to read.

And that’s the thing! It’s a service that you are doing, letting people read your words, your story, letting people see your art and your creativity. 

Don’t be ashamed of your fandom works. And don’t be ashamed of reading fanfictions. They’re a part of you. So don’t think of yourself lowly. No way. You’re all heroes, in your own ways. 

Some of the best written stories I’ve ever read came from AO3, some of the best art works and funniest content I’ve ever seen are fandom related.

You’ve got this, you talented talented human being. Go out there and shine bright! 🌟

[blondbadbitchp]

blood moon

young Remus Lupin x you

Idea: struggling with period cramps and remus comforts you 

Warnings: fluff, period, sry for my bad grammar (english is not my first language, sometimes i randomly change between past and present, and i cannot explain why i am so dumb), not proof read

! NOT MY ARTWORK, but one of my fav remus fanart

Credits: lunopal_ (Instagram)

Note: just a little story to comfort everybody who's on their period right now or just don’t feel well. I’m definitely not the best at writing, just trying my best. Leave a comment if you like and tell me what you think :)

<3 <3 <3

“Hey little dove,” Remus was entering the common room, which was surprisingly empty for a friday afternoon. What he saw brought a worried look to his face. You were laying on the couch with your face buried in a red cushion, your favorite stuffed animal pressed close to your body. The only sound coming from you was an annoyed “mh.” 

“Darlin’ is everything okay?”

You tried to move your body and getting into a sitting position. “I got my period this morning and i just feel so exhausted.” You looked up at him with puppy eyes and said with a more soft voice “my stomach hurts so much and my breasts are so sensitive.”

Your wolfboy knew what to do. He came close to you and kissed your forehead, then your cheek and finally brushed his soft lips against yours. You tasted the honey chapstick he only put on because he knew you loved it so much. (Which he stole from your bag a couple of weeks ago) 

"you need to kiss my belly and cuddle me all night long," you explained to him.

“oh alright i understand, you want me to take care of my girl?” He said with a smirk on his lips. He already knew the answer. 

You didn't need to say more. Remus picked you up bridal style, carried you to the dorms and laid you carefully onto his bed and his soft big pillows. Remus was in front of you, with his large hands he pulled your (his) sweater up your body over your breast. 

"You feel comfortable like this, sweetheart? I need you to say something if you get cold"

“If you touch me with your warm hands in the next minute, Lupin, then i will not get cold” you shot back in a playful tone.

Before you could said anything more, his lips were on yours in a passionate kiss. You couldn’t hold back a smile. With his lips he traveled down your neck, to the place between your tits, then kissed your nipples softly. Meanwhile he put his hand on your hips, caressing the complete sides of your body down to your thighs. You always felt safe with him, he appreciated every part of your body. You never felt ashamed in front of him. Even though you didn’t always liked yourself and the way you looked.

“Darling i love your body, your thighs are beautiful and your belly is so soft. You just look like an angel” While saying that he smoothly grabbed the skin on your legs.

“Can I lay my head down on you?” Remus asked after kissing your stomach after every single sentence he said.

“Of course, I actually love it when you do that.” you answered him smiling.

He laid his head down on your stomach and his body took place between your legs. Honestly, this was his favorite place. His weight on top of yours was like those weight blankets against anxiety - it calmed you down in the best way. Your hands found their way to his slightly curled hair and massaged his scalp. He growled in response, his deep shade of voice sent shivers through your whole body. 

“Do you feel better?” remus asked after a few moments of peaceful silence.

“Yes, a little. My cramps stopped and my back hurts less now. Thank you.” 

“You know i would always take care of you” he paused for a second..”because i love you y/n.” He was now looking up from your body and locked his eyes with yours.

"And i love you” you could feel your own heartbeat so intense that every pain was forgotten.

This was the first time you said it to each other.

[totesnothere04]

Day to Day Norm Pt.1

Norm Spellman x Fem!Quaritch!Reader

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the fanart, screenshots, or gifs used with my stories.

Warnings: Idfk we'll find out when we get there lmao.

Pt.2

I plan in making these chapters shorter, because it's gonna be a longer series. Sorry yall I really don't wanna burn myself out again, especially since I've got multiple fandoms fighting over my last surviving brain cell. 😭

You paced into your dad's office and plopped into the chair across from his and threw your feet up on the table.

"You alright baby girl?" Your Dad asks as he looks up at you.

"I'm exhausted." You admit to him slightly defeated.

"I understand but think about it. After the newbies get their safety briefing you can go back to your bunk and go to sleep. It's only a few more hours sweet pea." Your Dad said with a soft smile reserved just for you.

"I've been awake for 24 hours because Wainfleet didn't want to do his part in getting everything ready for the newcomers." You complained and your dad's back went rigid.

"I gave him orders those were his to follow through with. I'm sorry, baby girl, but you're gonna have to wait until after. Then you can go to bed." Your Dad said then patted your foot. "Get your feet off my desk. How many times do I gotta tell ya?" He jokes as the both of you stand up to head to the mess hall. Zhang jogs up to the two of you and turns to face your Dad.

"I'm sorry sir, but Wainfleet is requesting (Y/n)'s help out on the tarmac." Zhang says and you groan. You turn and make your way to the airlock and grumble all the way out to where Lyle is.

"What the fuck do you want now Wainfleet?" You ask angrily.

"One of the patrols is late reporting in." Lyle tells you.

"Okay. You realize we're the same rank and you could be useful for once and check it out yourself." You say and he shakes his head.

"I've got to be at the safety briefing with the Colonel." He says and you scoff.

"Yeah so do I." You say agitated while you stomp back into the base but you make your way up the control center stairs instead. Once back inside you throw off the exo-pack and march over to the com systems. You find the bird thats late and call it.

"Chacon... Where in the name of everything holy are you?" You ask.

"Sorry, Corporal, Augustine and McCall got caught up collecting samples." She responds.

"Look, as much as I love those two you need to get your asses back asap. You're late and in doing so I'm late." You say as calmly as possible.

"Ma'am I can report them back in when they return." The woman you're bent over says.

"Alright. Thank you." You say and look at the name on her uniform.

"Chacon, Hayward is going to report you back in when you return. I gotta go." You say and don't even wait for a reply as you walk away. You enter the mess hall, clearly agitated but trying to stay calm. However, wheelchair man decided it would be a good idea to just stay in the middle of the walkway. You sigh quietly and step up onto the bench and then the table just to step down on the other side. Your dad lights up when he spots you.

"This is my righthand woman, Corporal Quaritch. You can't find me, find her. Except for the next 24 hours, she'll be asleep." You look at wheelchair man and realize you startled him, but can't bring yourself to care right now. You went to follow behind your dad but made eye contact with a new scientist. Your breath silently hitched and he blushed. You hardened the look on your face into a glare and moved on. You got up to the front and leaned against the window seal. The same scientist from before makes eye contact with you again, but this time you decide to play since you're no longer the center of attention. You wink at him and he blushes again.

'Oh yeah, definitely my type.' You think to yourself as you continue to look around the new people. Your dad wrapped things up and you made your leave. You decided to check up on Grace before you went to sleep since you were her usual off-base escort. When you got there she was still in her pod so you took to her desk and sat in her chair to wait. With the new guys in she would be exiting her pod any minute now. You pulled your cap over your eyes and threw your feet up on her desk. You dozed off in a matter of a few moments but were rudely woken by someone shoving your feet off their perch. You groaned as you sat up and allowed your cap to fall into your hands.

"Good to see you too, Grace." You said jokingly, but you were met with a very angry expression. "Did... Did I ruin some documents or... What did I do?" You asked her.

"You didn't do anything." She said exasperated. "Look. I need you to keep an eye on Sully."

"Who?" You asked in confusion.

"The guy in the wheelchair. He's one of my new avatar drivers." She says and you become more confused.

"But... That guy is definitely a jarhead." You say as you steal a glance at him.

"The other one is cute though." You sit back and Grace looks at you astounded.

"Someone gaining your attention? Unheard of." She says with a laugh.

"Yeah I know right? I don't know how he did it, but he's got my attention. 100%." You say as you steal another glance only to find him already looking at you. You wink at him again and he quickly looks away.

"Seems you've got his attention too." Grace says with a laugh.

"How long was I asleep?" You ask her.

"About an hour. I let you get a nap in before I sent you back to your room." Grace tells you and you lean your chin on your hand. "I went to have a chat with Slefridge. I'm not happy that we got this Sully. We need his brother. The PhD that trained for 3 years for this job."

"Well, why did he back out last minute? There might've been a good reason." You say and a tap on your shoulder makes you freeze. You slowly turn to look at the person behind you and find Sully and the cute guy.

"He died." Sully said and you cringed.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be rude." You said and he shook his head.

"You weren't. We were wondering if someone could show us to our bunks?" Sully asks and I stand up.

"Let me see your room numbers." You say holding out your hand and he hands it to you. "Heh, would ya look at that. You two are right down the hall from me. Come on. I'll see you tomorrow Grace. I look forward to seeing them link for the first time." She waves as she takes the seat you just vacated.

"I wanted to say thanks for not treating me differently just because I'm paralyzed." Sully says and you huff out of your nose.

"My dad was a marine, but according to him, once a marine always a marine. Oorah or whatever." You say and he chuckles.

"Never went into the military?" He asks with a chuckle.

"Nope. Dad wanted me to get my GED at 16 so I could ship out here." You tell him and he looks at you confused.

"If he wasn't watching over you, then who was?" He asks and you scoffed.

"My mother... But I prefer to call that woman my surrogate. She never really learned that once you're a parent you focus on your child's well-being. Instead, she collected the child support my Dad was sending and spent it on her stuff. The RDA was nice enough to allow me to start working for them early. Course back then it was simple tasks. Train, learn, and run things back and forth for Selfridge. Guy took a liking to me and started helping me further my "career"." You tell them then blinked. "Woah. Sorry man didn't mean to info dump."

"It's all good. You seem cool to hangout around." Sully says.

"You too Sully." You say and he laughs.

"You can call me Jake. This is Norm." He introduces cute guy.

"So that's your name. Yeah, you caught my attention earlier." You say without thought of making him feel awkward.

"R-really?" He asks.

"Oh yeah. I like men with a brain." You say as you turn the corner and see Lyle standing at your door down the hall.

"C'mon (Y/n) I know you're in there. Stop ignoring me." He calls and you cough. He turns to look at you then scratches his neck. "Hey (Y/n). What, uh, what are you up to?"

"Showing Jake and Norm to their bunk so I can go to sleep." You say with an edge and he groans.

"(Y/n)-" Lyle starts but you roll your eyes.

"Didn't my Dad give you orders to follow through with? I think you should go do that." You say and he walks away. Once he's out of earshot you turn to the two guys. "That guy? Has one brain cell and it's currently fighting a losing war to steroids." You joke and Jake busts out laughing with Norm chuckling quietly. "This is you guys. If you need anything I'm right down there."

"So we gathered." Jake jokes and you walk away chuckling.

"I'm gonna get some rack. I suggest you do that too." You tell them and then disappear into your room. You quickly shower and dress for sleep and lay down. You fall asleep as soon as your head hits the pillow.

The next day you're happily making your way to the link room and find Max and Grace.

"Hey, you got here just in time. They just went in and it seems lover boy has taken to his avatar well." Grace says. "You want to join me?" Grace asks.

"I don't know. You know my dad doesn't like me hanging around you "science pukes"." You quote him and she scoffs.

"You're 22 (Y/n). You can do what you want." She says and you shuck off your jacket. She smiles and pats the pod next to hers. "We're going in."

"How much you wanna bet that Jake's gonna take off?" You ask her and she glares at you.

"$20 that he doesn't." She says and you laugh.

"$20 that he does." You counter and she shakes her head. You lay down in the link pod and close your eyes. You sit up in your avatar and giggle as you change your clothes. Grace meets you outside of the cabin and you see a blur of blue and white charging toward the two of you. "You owe me $20 Grace." You chuckle and she laughs as she picks a fruit. You pick one too and start eating it.

"Hey marine!" Grace calls out. Jake looks up and seems star struck.

"Grace?" He asks.

"Who else numbnuts?" She asks laughing. "Think fast!" She throws the fruit to him and he catches it. "Motor controls looking good." He bites into the fruit and looks at it astonished.

"They're good aren't they?" You ask him and his eyes snap over to you.

"(Y/n)?" He asks and you roll your eyes.

"Well duh." You say and Grace pinches your arm.

"I thought only scientists had avatars?" He asks.

"Well I'm a special case. Did I forget to tell you that I'm going to college for Pandoran botany and Grace is basically my teacher?" You smirk and he chuckles. The patter of feet behind Jake and a voice.

"Jake! Geez we're not supposed to be- Oh hey Grace!" He says with a wave and he notices you. "(Y/n)?" He says as he looks you up and down.

"In the flesh." You say and Jake elbows him and wiggles his eyebrows. His cheeks dust indigo and he clears his throat.

"So no shoes huh?" He says and you laugh.

"Smooth recovery, Spellman. No shoes. It's the way Na'vi travel, so it's how I travel." You say and he nods. Grace nudges you.

"That's a lie. She likes to feel the dirt between her toes. Reminds her of home." Grace says with a smile and you scoffed.

"Okay yeah that might be it." You say and cross your arms. "Don't they have tests to take or somethin'?" You ask annoyed and Grace leads them to the course.

As eclipse fell on Pandora you laid down in your cot and shut your eyes. When you opened the lid of your pod you were met by your dad's face.

"Hey Dad." You greet him but he scoffs.

"You know how I feel about you hanging around these lab coats." Your Dad says and you sigh.

"I'm literally Grace's student. I'm going to be one of these lab coats one day." You tell him and he sighs.

"I'm sorry. You missed dinner." He says and your shoulders sag.

"Sorry Dad, but Jake kept getting distracted by his tail. I had to teach him how to control it." You laugh as Jake hauls himself out of his pod.

"You'd find it weird too if you had a random tuft of fur keep smacking your arms." Jake complains and you laugh at him.

"Been there, and I got over it." You say as you get up fully.

"Baby girl I saved us a couple of plates so we can eat together like usual." Your Dad says and you nod.

"Thanks Dad." You walk out with him. When you sit down with him to eat he looks up at you.

"Somethin' tells me that there's somethin' goin' on between you an' Sully." Your Dad says and you cringe.

"You know I like my men to have a brain. It's why I refuse to go out with Lyle." You say and he laughs.

"Yeah. I forget you don't want to end up like your ma." He says as he fiddles with his food.

"Yeah, no. I don't want to end up like my pa' more like. That woman has no brain. I don't know what you saw in her." You said and he laughed.

"She was pretty and showed interest." He laughed and you rolled your eyes.

"Gross. If you must know Norm has my attention. He's so easily flustered and he's tall and he's really smart." You say as you blush and look away from your Dad.

"I'm not ready." He says and you roll your eyes.

"Dad. I'm 22." You say and he sighs.

"You're my baby." He says and you laugh.

"Dad... I've been thinking." You say and he sets up straight.

"Uh oh. Thats dangerous." He says with a laugh.

"Ha ha. You've been supporting me my whole life. I need to establish my own career because I need to be independent. It's a hard pill to swallow, but I won't have you forever." You say and he reaches across the table and takes hold of your free hand.

"Kiddo. I know it's been rough going, but I'm gonna be here for as long as I can be. I gotta be able to meet any grandbabies you might give me." He says.

"Grandbabies won't happen if you won't let me be an adult and find a man." You post out and he groans.

"I know. Well kid you've got a busy day tomorrow and so do I. Let's get some rack. Love you baby girl." He says as he lands a peck on the top of your head.

"Love you too Dad." You say as you make it back to your room. You shower and dress for bed and then lay down and sleep takes you over.

You had woken up early and gotten to the link room to connect to your avatar. Helping Trudy load her Samson was always easier this way. As you walked into the hangar your Dad was right next to you immediately.

"Baby girl, what did I say about your avatar bein' in the hangar?" He asks and you groan.

"But it's easier to load the Samson this way. No need for friggin' cranes or anything." You say and he makes a face of agreement.

"Alright but it's not allowed inside unless you're loading a ship." He says and you nod.

"Yes, sir. Understood. Lima Charlie, and all those things you say all the time." You joke and he laughs as he playfully nudges your thigh. "You know you can't push me around while I'm in my avatar right?"

"I know, but you're still my little girl." He says and you groan again.

"Dad!" You complain and he walks away from you heading to the gym. You split off toward Trudy and start helping her prepare for everything. Jake rolls up behind the two of you and stops.

"You must be Jake. I'm Trudy and this is my baby. Hope you don't mind that I have you on a side gun. (Y/n) wants to just be a nerd today." She jokes with you and you roll your eyes.

"Ha ha. Very funny Trudy. I'm just enjoying the view today." You say. "But while holding a gun."

"Follow me Jake. Got someone who wants to speak with you." She says and leads him away and you decide to go back outside.

"See ya in a bit Wainfleet." You call over your shoulder. You go and collect some fruits for snacks and wait for everyone to join you.

[starclast]

Entering gravity falls 📌

Soooo...I've talked about before on how did I first encounter certain games/series or entered certain fandoms and such but...honestly? Out of everyone...how I came to actually enter to gravity falls fandom is (for now) certainly the *weirdest* of them all 😅

To be honest with you, I wasn't interested at all in gravity falls when it was first airing. I was in my, what could be called, *you cant watch cartoon shows, that's childish* face...😑 Back then I kind of knew about gravity falls and had seen some little bits here and there but not really knew anything about it. And the fact that I thought the art-style was *childish* too didn't help me at all to get interested in it. Years passed and my knowledge about it grew...a tiny bit (if knowing that Bill Cipher would bring the apocalypse seems like a tiny bit to you 😶), buuut I was still pretty uninterested so any spoiler that crossed my way just didn't hit hard me at all 😑

More years passed and then I stumbled my way into itchio, where I started to look for games I could play. Then I saw it for the very first time, the fangame: Swooning over Stans ✨✨✨ And then I was like *...What??? Why does these two look so simi-? Oh wait, they are twins. huh...Wait a minute, this one looks familiar to me*. I read that it was inspired by gravity falls and though it didn't click me at first, at the end, I remember that indeed there was a series called gravity falls and so I...kept scrolling 😶 Yep, I still wasn't interested in it or anything related to it aaaand it stayed like that...until last year.

One afternoon I was bored, like BORED to death and nothing, nothing remotely interesting seem to be in my way 😑 Sooo since I didn't anything better to mind, I said to myself: *why not try out that gravity falls fangame? At least it will be good to pass the time* And so, I did.

At first I was jus planning to try out one route, Fords route, to be more specific, because he was the one who got my attention out of the two, and then...it caught me 😆 It wasn't like I fell or find it interesting instantly, but the art-style, humor and characters started to appeal to me more and more as I kept playing (and even though I was spoiled already for some of the stuff that there were mentioned, my mind didn't relate them or kind of forgot about it all together so... My first playthrough wasn't perfect at all, but overall I had an incredibly more enjoyable experience than what I first expected, so I decided to keep playing! 🤗

I tried out Stan's route then, and though I didn't got a perfect, I still had a lot of fun!! Soooo...I kept tryin until I made it 😅

I only made two OCs while playin. First was Misha for Fords route, and then Ann for Stan's route. Their designs came to me surprisingly easily, actually, and though they are pretty simple, I quite like how they look! 😄

After the game, I obviously wanted to draw some fanarts and such...but I struggled a lot because it quite differed from my usual style of drawing (specially the head shape, eyes and nose 😅) But well, as you can see, I managed to do it!!! 🤗🤗🤗

In the end, I liked the game so much so that I couldn't stop myself from wanting to see the series it was based on and till this very day...I don't regret that decision 🤩🤩🤩 So yeah, thank you very much to everyone who worked on this project and gave me an opportunity to finally get into gravity falls!!! ...Though it was in a kind of weird way, haha 😅

[sam-loves-seb]

gallavich questions

thanks for the tag (and the questions) @callivich !!

What’s a fic you’ve read more than once? intro to quantum dating by @spoonfulstar, i think i've read it 3 or 4 times now, it's one of my all time favorites

What’s a gifset you always have to reblog? anytime i see a gifset from that one s5 deleted scene, yeah that one, i have to reblog

What’s a headcanon you can’t stop thinking about? i have a very specific headcanon for a tattoo ian gets post-canon for mickey, and i hesitate to even explain it now bc i think one day i do wanna write a fic about him getting it, but whatever--my headcanon is that he gets an M tattooed on his left ring finger and it's a subtle yet sweet nod to his husband. (i could talk about this for 9 hours but i will limit myself and stop here)

What’s a fanart you love looking at? i've spent an obscene amount of time staring at this fanart by @doodlevich it just checks all my boxes (domestic, husbands, fluff, etc.) and it's so well done, i'm obsessed with this pieces

What’s an idea you’d love to create if you had the time/inspiration? listen, i have this idea for a rock band au that lives rent fucking free in my head, and if i can find the time and the inspiration to actually turn these vibes and unorganized plot points into actual words and a coherent story in the new year, then maybe it'll see the light of day in 2024 but no promises. for now, i leave you with this: four milkovich siblings are in a rock band that is rising to success with the launch of their second studio album and subsequent tour, and ian gallagher is lead singer mandy's (fake) boyfriend--at least in the eyes of the public--and he spends some time that summer touring with the band and hooking up with their lead guitarist in secret until the band's manager/father catches wind of what's going on behind closed doors

What’s something you’ve discovered since entering this fandom? A new trope you love? A different analysis of the show? Something else? i've always been a post-canon enthusiast for almost all of my ships, but i think before gallavich i always envisioned them with a very cookie cutter standard american dream family with the house and the careers and the 2.5 kids, which usually fits a lot of my ships, but with gallavich i... don't have that same vision ?? i think they're actually my first ship that i hc more often than not without kids in their post canon life, which is a new vibe for me entirely but i kinda love reading/writing it. idk if that answers the question you asked, but it definitely answered a question

What’s an underrated trope or concept you’d like to see more of? honestly i want more s9/10 prison era gallavich fics (and/or fanart). i think it's a gold mine era with so much untapped potential, and there are very few fics/series/whatever that really get deep with it and get to the good stuff of these two boys who haven't spent any significant time together in years but still love each other like they did way back when

What’s your favourite season? And has this changed after multiple rewatches of the show? it flip-flops for me between s4 and s5, like right now i think it's s5 but idk if i could actually pick one or the other as my absolute favorite

What’s a plot hole you wish had been answered or resolved? i would give my left arm to know how the fuck (and why the fuck) mickey started rolling with his dad again in post-prison s10 era, like in 10x08 he's going to terry for advice on how to protect ian, just for terry to try to kill him again 3 episodes later ??? make it make sense john wells i'm under your bed

What scene or moment do you feel isn’t discussed enough? personally i think the promise ring scene in 10x09 is criminally underrated and not talked about nearly enough, like you don't understand how happy that scene made me (stay with me here) seeing mickey stand up and fight for the future he really wants with ian and not settling for anything less

What line/dialogue/description from something else (a poem, a book, a tv show, a movie, or something else) do you feel describes Ian and Mickey’s relationship? can i do song lyrics? i'm gonna do song lyrics--i've always thought the song godlight by noah kahan was very gallavich, especially the chorus, and especially during s4/5/6 era and it may or may not be a piece of inspiration for my big bang canon divergent fic

What do you think is next for Ian and Mickey post-finale? i think they take a while to really settle into their new place and and make it their own, and it's a bit of an adjustment (for both of them) to fit in with this new crowd and this new environment, but they're learning how to grow and evolve together and at the end of the day that's all that really matters to the both of them

tagging: literally anyone who wants to play bc my brain is tired and i am too tired to try and remember everyone i probably should tag

[tblsomedoodles]

Now that we're entering into 2024, I'm asking some artists and writers that I follow:

1) What is the one piece you're most proud of from this past year?

2) What are some pieces that you would have liked more people to see? If you can include links, I'd love to go check them out!

3) What were your top three favorite pieces (art, comics, fics, etc) that someone else has made this past year?

(As always, no pressure to respond! Feel free to just ignore, or let me know if you'd rather I not send you these kinds of asks in the future.)

Oh let's see!

1 ) Fic wise, i'm really proud of "Proud Family Tradition". I was actually able to finish it this year, which i'm super excited about and, in general, i just love how it turned out vibe wise.

Art wise, that's a hard one. Um...I'm going to go with the "Non-cannon Leo meets Clara comic" b/c i love how it turned out. The looser render style mixed with the limited dialogue and not-overly-distinct panels look so cool together. and it helped me start experimenting with other brushes by doing so.

2 ) Probably anything with Jenny (from Family Web). For whatever reason she doesn't tend to get very many notes at all, especially compared to anything else really.

For specific things, ummm...probably My Good Omens doodle from september. I redid a panel from an old animatic of mine and I love how the whole thing turned out, but it didn't do well at all. And Maybe my Forever Alone animatic. Again, love how it turned out, but it's for an au that i haven't really done much with beyond this and a donnieverse stop so it didn't get seen as much as i would have liked. It's based on the first thing i wrote for rise (though i haven't quite posted it yet. I've got to get on that) and i learned a lot making that video. Heck, i even got a decent looking fightscene in there lol.

3 ) Only 3?? ok, i'm gonna try lol.

ok, so no particular order (b/c i'm literally just going through my bookmarks on ao3 lol)

"things that ought to Crawl" by mudlarkspur (WisteriaParfait) (AO3). A very good "Draxum finds a little feral donnie and accidentally becomes a parent along the way". Very cute. Love it. Been meaning to do some fanart but haven't gotten the chance (or courage) to do so yet.

"Minor Interference" by bambiraptorx (AO3). Basically The turtles accept Draxum's offer to train them so they can prank him while doing so and everyone starts catching familiar feelings along the way. Super cute. definitely recommend if you want some chaotic shenanigans and occasional fluff : )

oh last one...um....ummm....ummmmmmmmm........Oh!

"Rotten Reflections" by Nicoforlife (AO3). Rise Leo and Donnie end up in 12tmnt, but it's dark/suspenseful, and they're both feral and injured. Idk, i just love this fic in general. I've read it 3+ times over the last year (i don't really reread that much that quickly, so that's significant) and will be rereading again so to catch up. (i'm behind on all my reading atm. it's sad) I just vibe with it. Again, another fic i need to do fanart for but haven't yet.

(this was so hard! There's just so many i love. picking only 3 was very difficult)

Thank you!!

[im-s0rry]

Grimm's Deltarune Secret Boss Masterpost

I've decided to make a Blog specifically for my Deltarune Fanart, Ideas, Concepts, Etc so I decided to make a masterpost for all my Secret Boss OCs.

Get Ready for heeps and heeps of lore and ocs.

Sketchit, Main Secret Boss OC.

TL;DR - Secret Boss for my main Deltarune AU/sidestory about an art studio. She's a forgotten sketchbook and is a conspiracy theorist who needs to prove herself right. Eventually she turns into a sick spider god for her Boss fight thanks to an artifact.

Lore - Sketchit used to be the main bosses apprentice, some would say his favorite apprentice. Well, until she was thrown to the streets when she wasn't useful to him anymore. She was distraught and broken and looking for answers...and someone gave her a sliver of the truth. A mysterious man told her something about the truth...and left her to figure out the rest...and oh boy she's trying. She began making theories and fully believing them until the story she made seemed to devolve and become very, very complex. Eventually, The Fun Gang came along and got split up. Kris and Ralsei took a wrong turn and met her. She explained the truth of this world and Ralsei interjected, saying that she was way off. Sketchit was pissed and, after a fight, told Kris to bring her an artifact in the main boss's fortress. If you break into the Librar(b)y and find the artifact, Sketchit will break through the wall, steal it, and read through it to show she was right...but she wasn't...she was way off...Sketchit didn't know how to feel...but she knew what she had to do. If she wasn't right, then she had to make it right...and Sketchit absorbed the Artifact to turn her into the spider god form I talked about. You get the Purple soul and kick her into the ground until she dies and she can finally rest...

Fredde-E, funni little guy

TL;DR - Fredde-E is THE burnt Ice-E box that was buried in the graveyard and now wants to be the king of fear. He eventually does become the king of fear through a contrived series of events and you kick his shins.

Lore - Fredde-E once wanted to make friends. He was once a humble little guy who just wanted friends...until the friend he tried to make burnt him alive and threw him in a ditch. But he felt something during that encounter, a new feeling. Something bonechilling that he had to share. He felt fear, and he wanted more of it. He took up arms, getting his claw from a...very interesting character...and went to try and scare people. Unfortunately he's adorable and no one found him scary, which really upset him...until the Fun Gang arrived and he found out about something he could do to finally be the "Nightmare-E King"...if you do his side quest he knocks you out and drags you to his lair where you have an epic anime battle with him with the Orange Soul where you kick his shins in until he feels that same feeling he felt all that time ago...but this time I'd be his last...

Tumbal, Your Old Pal

TL;DR - Locked in glass when the show was over / his body stood still and his mind would wander / a mysterious man appeared one day / and took the last bit of sanity away. / unlock the Box the Gods had forgot / and walk inside for his end was for not / one last show would be his last / but this last show would be one hell of a blast...

*snaps from the audience*

Lore - Tumbal was once the sheriff in an old western show, but when the show got canned and the cast left, he stayed behind in that set and was locked behind a pain of glass. His mind was left to rot and wither until he was demented and violent...and a strange crystal from a mysterious man only increased this. Eventually, Kris came alone and saw him behind his glass, and if you do the side quest, you and the Fun Gang will enter the set and get to meet Tumbal for one last show where you use the Green Soul and kill him.

Snakeyes, A new face in the worst of places.

TL;DR - Okay so there's Snake and there's Eyes, they may be the same person but different personalities. Gaster gives Snake a Shadow Crystal which makes him extremely violent, crazy, and obsessed with gambling. After some casual violence and being kicked to the streets, Eyes locks Snake up and he'll only show up if anything gambling were to show up which would never happen...right? They gave him dice, didn't they? Damn it.

Lore - So Snakeyes is the secret boss of a Dark Web "Chapter 2.5" Dark World. He's a "Fluffy Pony" Video. Which if you don't know, watch Cupcakes HD, then you will. Snake actually hit it off with the resident gang of the dark world and was on a hot streak...until the House decided to kick him out and rob him. He was distraught and took a strange crystal from Mr. WD Man and went insane. After beating the living hell out of the gang that threw him out, Eyes took over and was beat up and thrown to the streets. Eyes tried to lock up Snake in their mind and would only get out if anything gambling related was shown to him...and if you want to fight him, you do. Snake shows up and SUMMONS THE DEAD and you have to fight him with the Blue Soul untim you beat him up and he and Eyes die ): .

Other Secret Boss OCs I've made.

-Hattyr - A lost hat that gain the power to control the shadows and wanted to take revenge when The Spooky Bois came in and made his Dark World Spooky. He has a cool Secret boss form and you use the Orange Soul.

-Sadedown - A Reindeer Pez dispenser that Susie bit in half that took revenge by role-playing as Noelle to trick Susie to kill her for mutilating her. She uses the Blue Soul in her fight.

-Shröd - My fursona as a Chapter 2 Secret Boss thats a old folder of bad cat memes. They are definitely not Temmie trust me bro and you fight them in their Paradox Forme with the Light Blue Soul.

And that's a fraction of the secret boss ocs I'm comfortable sharing in this masterpost. I will probably be posting about them here and I hope you enjoyed at least one of my characters (let's be honest, it's Tumbal.)

[firefly--bright]

without home (without you)

jean kirstein x gender neutral!reader

a blooming hearts extra!

warnings : heavy, heavy angst, grief, aot-verse violence mentions, manga chapter spoilers!!!!!! major character death (it's you lmao you're the character-) proceed w caution! can be read as a stand alone piece but reading blooming hearts would help :)

summary : an almost devastating need to be with you. his skin wanted to lay with yours. jean doesn't know what to do with his hands now that you're gone.

a/n : damn this was hard to write. i love writing angst but mmm this was kinda tricky cause it's about poppy, yk? i had to do alot of digging on Jean's character and watched a few videos about it too, just to get this perfect. i hope it was worth it and that you guys would like this :) engagement is very appreciated!

tagging : @a10vely-yutazen taglist is open!

✿ blooming hearts playlist ✿ fic pinterest board ✿ enter my taglist ✿ main masterlist is in pinned navigation ✿ requests are open! ✿

fanart in the middle by @/gemmsen on Instagram.

--

Jean didn’t realise his bones hurt this much.

He knew they’d hurt after all the years being spent in relentless fighting, but he didn’t know they'd hurt this much. He assumed the pain would go away as soon as he lead a more relaxing life, but it seemed to stay.

His mother had opened the door to his childhood house with a wide grin and tearing escaping her eyes. She never cried when he was a kid – a sign jean took for her strength. But when she stood infront of him, head near his weary but beating heart, he heard her sob. And out of all things she could do, she thanked him.

Him. she thanked him.

And what for? For returning empty handed? Returning with less than he had started out with? Returning without bringing you?

He had promised her in those letters he wrote to her almost every other month that he’d bring you along with him when he would finally come back home after all these years. That his mother would love you and show you around jean’s childhood garden and make you his favourite food in hopes you’d love it too. he wondered if his mother was waiting for you as much as she was waiting for him.

But the wait would have been futile anyway. You would never grace his old house, your soft footsteps would never pad along his childhood room that still had his old drawings and sketches and clothes that he bet his mother still kept in his closet, collecting dust.  

He hugged his mother close to his chest. After he was ushered inside by the older woman, she had promptly made him tea with milk the same way he’d drink it as a child and some toast with a little bit of sugar sprinkled on top. The same toast you had tried to make in Marley after he told you about his old favourite treat. he remembered you putting a little too much sugar on it, and when jean complained about it, you just shrugged and told him his bitter attitude would be fixed if he ate the whole thing.

He ate the whole thing. Not to fix his ‘bitter attitude’ but to see your smile on your face as you prepared to make the second piece of toast, this time with less sugar.

His mother talked about all the things he’d missed. She talked about how Mr. Thompson’s boy ran away one time, and how he came back at night after he became too hungry. The boy’s mother had given him a beating after that, jean’s mother recalled. Jean smiled as he blew his tea to cool it, something he had to now get used to doing by himself. You’d always make the tea hot and let it cool down as jean slept through the sunrise. The commander position had been too much for him to handle as he sat through sleepless nights trying to complete the endless paperwork and future plans himself. You’d try to stay up by his side, but ended up passing out after having to help armin with the new train track plans the entire day in the blazing paradis sun. the milky tea would cool down to be a temperature which jean actually enjoyed sipping it in, so in some ways, the sleeplessness would be worth it.

He remembered you trying out coffee for the first time in Marley. Your nose scrunched and eye twitched as you drank the bitter liquid, but you tried to maintain your composure infront of the azumbito who had so kindly offered you the drink. The cup went untouched after the first sip. Jean had to finish it off so you wouldn’t feel bad about being rude to your hosts, and with his stone face as he sipped the wretched thing, he saw your shoulders relax a bit. He remembered thinking he would make you pay him back, but for now, it would be worth it.

his mother knew better than to ask him about his experiences. She remembered when he wrote that letter describing when jean found his dear friend dead. The letter was one of the first he had ever written to her. It was short and to the point, but jean’s mother treasured it nonetheless. His mother told jean how there had been a shortage of apples for a while now, so her horse in the stable hadn’t seen his favourite treat for a long time. She left out the part where she would look at the empty stable next to her own horse, the one occupied by jean’s father’s horse.

Jean’s father had always been a touchy subject in the Kirstein household. Jean himself had his mother’s last name due to the reason, refusing to take his fathers. He’d leave and return at random times of the year, claiming something about “having work” which jean, even as a child, didn’t believe. He would almost always return an ungodly amount of time later, in the late hours of the night, claiming he missed his ‘wife’ even though the ring on jean’s mother’s hand was long gone, kept in the drawer in her closet. She told jean that she would give the ring to him when he decided to get married himself so that it could be like a family heirloom instead of something that made her see the man that she grew to hate.

She had kicked jean’s father out soon after she got better after being sick, when jean had been in the second year of his cadet training. She wrote the news to him in a letter that went unanswered for a long time. Jean didn’t acknowledge it until after the war in trost, when he diligently answered his mother’s letters – new and old – after you had told him to treat his mother better. He realised his stupidity the night you told him that after the close call to his death, he might as well tell his mother he was alive and somewhat well and that his teenage rage bullshit with his mother would only keep hurting the woman.

He detailed his apology in the next letter he wrote to her. She brushed his stupidity aside, saying she forgave him. she then asked about you in the letter.

Jean’s next letter was three whole pages long, front and back.

As he cleaned up from the warm and much needed dinner after a long day's travel, he wondered if she still kept that letter.

Jean wished he could go back. he wished he was here with you instead of alone. He wished you rode your horse alongside his and complained about how your back was hurting because of the long journey. Jean wished he could massage your back to relive you of the discomfort like how he used to after you had been slumped on your desk for too long.

he tried to swallow down the lump in his throat, shifting his attention to cleaning the dishes.

But how could he focus? Your hands weren’t wrapped around his waist, cheek pressed on his back like you used to back in Marley, in your shared apartment supplied by the Azumabito’s as the scouts tried to act like normal Marleyans and somehow gather information about the military and whereabouts of the suicidal maniac. But in your little home, coated in beautiful silence, you and jean were just…that. Just people. Not trying to stay alive on the rooftops of trost while fighting cannibalistic giants, not infront of your friend’s and old commrades’ graves asking for forgiveness, not a commander and his assistant. You were just two people, sharing a house, doing the dishes after eating dinner, with your feet touching the same ground, warm skin touching warm skin.

Jean sighed. The basin was a relatively new invention to paradis, and he was glad for that. He couldn’t imagine dipping his hand in the dirty water like he had to during his cadet days after you had been separated from him to clean up the stables.

Stop thinking, he tried to will himself with futile results.

Missing you would be an understatement. Missing you would be saying that you were only gone for a couple of days. Missing you sounded more like a promise, like a hope that you'd come back to him and he’d stop missing you. he wasn’t grieving you, either. He grieved marco. He grieved sasha. He grieved the commrades that died on his command, and he knew for a fact that grief wasn’t what he felt for you.

No, this felt more like… an ache. Residing deep in his muscles because they couldn’t hold you, residing deep in his lungs because they couldn’t smell the scent you left behind – the freshly washed clothes and the smell of flowers. After you had discovered perfumes in marley, it was over for you. you tried every single one, finally settling on the one marked as “pure blossom” and jean remembered calling it a stupid name because they could’ve just named it “flowers” instead of something pretentious, but the smile on your face made him pull his wallet out anyway.

The ache, as he decided to call it, was more dangerous than the grief. The ache felt more like a habit he had left behind instead of memories that would rush into his head. Habit of seeing you wake up next to him, of seeing you cutting up vegetables alongside him, of you strapping on his ODM gear. Things you had done to him a million times before, things he couldn’t call memories because memories would imply that he was going to forget them soon, or that he was intending to bury them with his countless other memories, but for him it felt like a cycle. Like the spinning of the candy floss he bought for you at your first carnival in the interiors of paradis as a cadet.

He hadn’t notice his mother walking back into the kitchen when she laid a hand on his shoulder. He had subconsciously stopped scrubbing the dishes, his hands frozen under the running water.

“I’ll clean up the rest, jean-bo. I set up your bed, so go and sleep.” She said.

Jean breathed. Nodding, he wiped his hands on the napkin next to him.

His upstairs room, as suspected, had been left untouched. He assumed there would be dirt everywhere, but jean’s mother seemed to have cleaned it. He sighed an affectionate smile.

The air in his room smelt like old wood soaked in rain. He padded his feet over to the window near his closet to let some fresh night air inside.

resting his chin on his palm, he looked out the now open window. The moon was full and beautiful, and under his room was the perfect view of the garden his mother was so fondly and patiently growing.

The moonlight gave just enough light to the flowers she grew. If memory served jean correct, some were tulips with their closed buds. Some were uncanny to white roses, but he wouldn’t know with the dim lighting. His eyes wandered the place, observing the flowers in the different staged of being bloomed, until they landed on them. The poppies.

The red flowers looked almost purple with the moon’s glow and the indigo night sky, but that didn’t stop jean from recognizing them, not after everything.

“poppy.” He whispered.

“poppy. Poppy. Poppy.” He repeated, like he thought saying it enough times would bring you back. he remembered how sasha had told him that if you say a name of a dead person three times infront of a mirror, their apparation would appear infront of you. sasha was from a small village, and the extents of her superstitious knowledge never failed to surprise jean, and he brushed her off saying it was just something her grandmother would have made up.

But although jean didn’t have a mirror infront of him, he hoped the conviction in his voice would do the trick. He hoped his tears would mold you out of the ground you had sank in after death, he hoped his hand pressed to his chest would breathe life to your sculpture and that you'd be here, infront of him, glowing beneath the moonlight, no longer in a pool of your own blood on the cold floor, that your warmth would be yours again.

But all he did was sob and repeat your nickname in between the pleads of your name, soon becoming incoherent and jumbled mush. His right hand was pressed on the centre of his chest where it hurt the most, where the only thing that would heal it would be your signature kisses to it, like your own handmade key. Like how his was on the tip of your nose. His left hand clasped his ear, hoping he would hear the sweet tunes of your voice again, but all he heard instead were his sobs and the gunshot that killed you.

But one of his wishes was granted. If he were not to hear you or touch you or feel you again, he could at least see you as he closed his eyes tightly. He saw the first time he’d seen you without your clothes, only in your undergarments. The curtains of his room were closed, as you both laid on his cool bedsheets. Jean’s eyes roamed your body, marking every bruise, fresh and old, and every scar, new and healing and healed. He remembered asking himself why the priests in the churches prayed to a god in the walls when his god was here, infront of him, breathing, and how they could ever worship something that wasn’t even half as real yet holy as you, how they could plead to the sky when you were intertwining his pinky with yours, and how they could devote to their readings even if they could never find the words you say to him in the scriptures. How could they worship someone who has never touched them the way you had to him, your hands now tracing his jaw, trailing down to his adams apple as he swallowed, then to all the scars on his chest and arms, the ones he’d always kept covered. Did the gods they worshiped make them feel free of all their sins as they claimed to the same way he felt his sins wash away as you held his hand? Jean was never the religious type, but he did remember thinking, no, knowing, that there had to have been some god in you. that you had to be a god. And of course, he couldn’t say these things out loud in a way that would make sense, so he just continued to look at you as his eyes fluttered shut that night.

His mothers hand encircled his shoulders as she sat down beside him, back pressing the wall with the window jean was previously looking out of.

His mothers hand encircled his shoulders as she sat down beside him, back pressing the wall with the window jean was previously looking out of.

his mother guided him to sit at the edge of his clean bed. she sat on the edge of the mattress, and jean instinctively rest the back of his head against her knees.

it was something they used to do - whenever jean would be bullied, which happened quite a lot, his mother would ask him to sit on the floor as she massaged his head and took away all his worries. he'd rant to her about the boys with raspy voices and bruised knuckles would pick on him and him only, while his mother reminded him he was special, that he was okay, that the boys only did that to him because they lacked the confidence jean had.

and when jeans mother, once again, brushed her hand through his hair, his sobs ceased. he still wanted to scream, burst out in the tears that he had already exhausted to an extent, but instead, he sat there with wet eyelashes and cheeks with closed eyes, thinking about you and the things he wished would happen. that's the only thing he could do, he realised. all he could do now was wish and dream and picture a life with you by his side instead of living the horrid reality without you.

his mother broke the silence. "tell me about them," she asks.

she doesn't have to; she knows everything there is to know about poppy from her point of view by Jean's numerous letters detailing his experiences which somehow always consisted you. but she asked anyway. maybe because she wished someone would have asked her about jean's father when he left because not only did she have so much to say, she felt as though if she didn't, then it would be less real. then it would be all in her head. and if her son was anything like her, he was feeling the same way right now.

jeans hands shook, something he had grown used to since being a scout and waking up with nightmares; only this time, you weren't with him, holding his palms with your fingers until they stopped moving feverously. with one of his hands on his chest and the other in his lap, he took seven deep breaths in the same way marco had taught him. inhale, hold for a couple seconds, and then exhale. he repeated that until he gained his voice again, until he was sure the lump in his throat had dissolved a little.

with his mother's hands still in his hair, Jean found the strength to speak. he opened his mouth.

“they… the first time we talked, they called me flower boy.” He said hoarsely, and even if he had exhausted his tears for atleast two weeks, his eyes still burnt from a memory he couldn’t go back to. He saw it clearly, as if it were yesterday; the dining hall was packed, the smell of moist old wood and stale bread and steamed vegetables stained the atmosphere. The fire lamp behind you hit the side of your face, and he heard your voice clear as the night sky outside – “flower boy” you had said and if jean had food in his mouth, he was sure he would’ve spit it out.

“it wasn’t even..” jean smiled sadly, “it isn’t even a romantic nickname like honey or babe or sweetheart but it still made me choke up and blush. I think it was the fact that it was a personal nickname that I knew they wouldn’t call anyone else. and we had this stupid competition where we’d see who could go through the forest faster with our new ODM gear and one time they crashed into me because they lost control and I was on crutches for the next two weeks and they felt so guilty about it that they made me a flower crown every other day. I wasn’t even mad at them, not really. I just wanted them to continue making the flower crowns so I pretended to be mad at them.” He said. His voice regained it’s strength, palms facing upwards on his lap, taunting him as they lay there empty without yours intertwined in them.

His mother hummed knowingly. She knew what it was like to be in the crutches of strong teenage love, feeling like she had an entire world to explore with this newfound vision. How she wished she could go back and tell her younger self to enjoy that rose-coloured feeling while it lasted.

“and they never stopped calling me that. It felt wrong for someone else to call me that,” jean explained, and he felt his hand drift to the centre of his chest, feeling his heart beat. It seemed calm now, he noted, how the rhythmic vibration didn’t seem as erratic as before. maybe his mother was right, maybe all he needed to do was talk about you.

But how long would it take? How long would he have to blabber on about you, which he would do very gladly, for his still beating heart to know that you were no longer here? That you weren’t the reason it would flutter and thrum against his chest? how much longer would he have to keep reminding himself that you wouldn’t stop him in his tracks if you ever spotted a poppy on your way to a bakery in marley?

“I don’t think I can….i don’t think I can live without them, ma. It hurts. It hurts so much.” The cold hand on his chest started shaking again. “I don’t want to open my eyes without them. I don’t want to…I don’t know what to do, ma, what do I do? What do I do with all of what I’ve felt and keep feeling for them?” he asks raspily, desperately, like his mother would know the answers to questions she herself hadn’t been able to answer. Jean turned his head towards her, placing his cheek on her lap as he closed his eyes once more. If his mother couldn’t answer him, surely the darkness would be able to do something, right?

“sweet heart… I will be honest, I don’t know. I wish I did, but I don’t. its like your hands don’t know what to hold anymore, isn’t it?” she paused. “I wont pretend to know what you’re feeling. But all I can say is that you keep loving them, jean-bo. Preserve it. Keep it locked up only for them. And then, when time comes, and when your chest stops aching so, you can let it go.” She says.

Jean shakes his head, “but what if my chest never stops hurting?”

His mother doesn’t answer.

Jean knew at a young age that his mother didn’t always know the answer. Where other boys would spew facts and trivia about the world as their mother told them, jean’s mother would only answer him with an apologetic look and a “you’ll know soon enough jean-bo. And when you do, be sure to tell me.” and sometimes jean would be jealous of the other boys for having a mother like theirs, but he would shake away that jealousy quickly enough, coming home to his mother with an unbuttoned shirt, crying because the button broke off during a rather aggressive play of catch, and his mother would quickly sew on a shiny new button to it’s original place.

He learnt that his mother may not have all the answers to the world, but atleast she’d know how to fix them. How to fill in the cracks of the questions to make it her own wall.

But now he was here, on his mother’s lap, asking her to fix his broken heart, asking her to fix his collapsing lungs and shaking hands, looking for answers he knew he couldn’t find. He knew you took the answers with you, and he knew the threads you so intricately wove into him, into his veins, were unravelling until there would be nothing but a husk of a body he once knew only through your stitches.

His mother took his shaking hands in her own, forcing him to sit up straight. Her thumbs rub over his scarred knuckles. She lets out a sigh.

“I don’t know.” She mutters. Its an apology.

 He doesn’t know either. He’s sorry too.

--

[askingpencilsketch]

Royburn: Hide Away, Hide Away from Me...

Please read the description while you’re looking at this fanart.

I don’t watch the Verbalase 50K Hazbin Hotel animation, but I saw some people doing this meme of Charlie Morningstar from Hazbin Hotel chasing someone on YT since last January and a few fanarts out of this meme on DeviantArt and Tumblr. So I decided to do a trend and joining the bandwagon with my own headcanon ship. Also, this title and fanart is a joke. So please don’t hate me on this. Thank you. 🙏

In this picture, Rayburn Jr. spending 50K wrestling belts from a stadium net or he’ll spend 50K meatballs by someone who’s spending it. Anyways, when he was trying to be a wrestler and earning a belt, there’s a portal next to him and he was entering Monsterdale. Rayburn Jr. was so confused for what he’s been up to this different universe, so he decided to tip toe and saw a yellow monster named Roy who’s standing in the middle of the streets. While he’s tip toeing at him, he was trying to wave at him, greeting at him and touching him nervously. Rayburn Jr. walks back slowly and suddenly, Roy glancing and stared at him while he’s blushing. He’s now frightened for being stalked by him, he decided to runs away from him in the middle of Monsterdale.

I know the meme was already dead, but I just want to have fun for this. By the way, the background was from episode 5 of season one, “Supermarket Match”.

[tetsunabouquet]

Thank you for doing vampire knight headcannons. I've always found the fandom to be boring with the back and forth between the stupid love triangle and the constant over the top analysis it was rare for the fandom to come together and have fun with the characters and the material! I hope to see you do more in the future (especially more on ichiru because he was always my favorite yet he was brushed aside even though his character is way more complex and his personality is so fun and interesting!)

No problem! Yeah, I'll admit whatever is left of the fandom is dull. Like, where is the Aidori content? I'll never shut up how insane it is for the most healthiest and ground-breaking ship to be sequel-only and barely discussed. I've been thinking of making some Aidori fanart myself because of the lack thereof. His love for her literally played such a big role in the cure for vampirism, it was epically bittersweet. And I'm a Kiryu twins girl so I feel you. The twins are hands down such interesting and complex characters, they feel pretty wasted on a typical vampire YA romance. Their dynamic could have been as twisted and wonderful as Darren and Steve from the Darren Shan Saga- It's been over a decade and I am still not over the revelation they turnt out to be half brothers and were set up to lead the two vampire clans into a war that would lead to apocalyptic circumstances. The Kiryu twins have that kind of potential and I am just fuming. Don't even get me started on how amazing Maria's character development is and how I want to strangle Matsuri Hino for not giving that girl the screentime she deserved. Again, she's a character that I could actually also picture as a bad-ass from a Darren Shan kind of story, similar to Debbie who let her love for one person transform her into a war heroine. I will never stop trying to make VK content and reading the sequels even as they enter Riverdale-like territory as we speak, because there are these wonderful crumbs that would have worked for a so much superior story and I just fell in love with the potential. The sweet stuff that is swept under the rug in favor for the love triangle and the Ren&Ai romance that still gives me a bad taste in my mouth because why did Matsuri Hino think more incest was a good idea-, the epic stuff that could have been, the tragic details that deserve to be fleshed out. I want to give VK the proper attention it deserves!

[lingy910y]

Gallavich Questionnaire

Thank you @energievie for tagging me to do this! I get too unhinged when talking about these two boys, so warning for very elaborate ramblings 🙏

1. What’s a fic you’ve read more than once?

This fic is the prime example of why you should write a fic even if you think nobody’s going to read it, because it’s my favorite gallavich fic even though most people don’t want to read about them getting a divorce. But I do, okay, because a normal break-up doesn’t cut it (especially since we already see those in canon, but post-canon is up to our interpretation) and it’s just more serious. I think they will work out their issues before it gets too far in canon but it just hurts so fucking good. The reason for their divorce is so realistic too, in fact it’s not one but a lot of problems piled on top of each other. They think it’s only going to hurt everyone involved including their children, which is arguably true in context, but they can’t resist each other and it’s this back and forth push. There’s parallels to canon, the writing is so good without being drawn out, and there’s so much nuance, emotion, and subtly hinting at something beneath the surface. The pining is just delicious because it’s not “I don’t know if you feel this way about me” or “I’m not allowed to be with you,” it’s “I want to be with you so badly but I’m trying to resist that because it’s going to hurt everyone.” Then the trying so hard not to care because “we’re over, but you’re in trouble and I’m trying to move on and I’m never going to love someone else like I love you” 😭😭😭 anyway I actually had to stop myself from rereading too often for comfort because it was too much LOL

the author said they were going to update it January of this year so I’ll be patiently waiting 😔

3. What's a headcanon you can't stop thinking about?

You know that post abt how when you're sleepy you imagine your favs sleepy? I keep imagining Ian wrapping their comforter around Mickey like a cocoon when he has a nightmare and cuddling him, it's cute

4. What's a fanart you love looking at?

The first image of this by @gallavichonly JUST GETS ME SO FERAL. THEIR FUCKING EXPRESSIONS.

5. What’s an idea you’d love to create if you had the time/inspiration?

I want to draw a character concept art sheet for their outfits/weapons/mechanics for kinda a zombie apocalypse AU. Designing that sounds fun but I need to research more

6. What’s something you’ve discovered since entering this fandom? A new trope you love? A different analysis of the show? Something else?

The jealousy trope, especially jealous Mickey. I guess in other fandoms, people write jealousy in a really possessive, cringy way. Not saying gallavich aren't possessive as fuck but at least they earned it, you know? There's too many ships where one of them is breathing down the other person's love interest's neck but they don't even know you exist, like calm down 😭 Meanwhile gallavich tease and try to get each other to admit it first, and Mickey is biting his tongue trying not to say anything and then "Fucking cheat on me, Ian?!", "Whatcha doin' here then?" AND THEIR EXPRESSIONS WHEN THEY EACH SAY "WHEN YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW" ARUGHHHHHH I'M SO GONE

7. What’s an underrated trope or concept you’d like to see more of?

Touched on this earlier but basically the more tragic/gritty ones—a huge argument, break-ups, unrequited love, falling out of love, hanahaki, amnesia, MCD...

10. What scene or moment do you feel isn’t discussed enough?

Eh I think we've dissected the shit out of every scene lmao, but probably their s4 reunion? The lap dance?

11. What line/dialogue/description from something else (a poem, a book, a tv show, a movie, or something else) do you feel describes Ian and Mickey’s relationship?

Obviously "I'll take care of you. / It's rotten work. / Not to me. Not if it's you."

12. What do you think is next for Ian and Mickey post-finale?

I want Ian to go back to being an EMT no matter what :( but their current security gig fits Mickey a lot. Ian also gets really into gardening, he'll be so good to the point where he'll be known in the neighborhood. And Mickey has a little hobby for drawing. They'll adopt a pitbull because Mickey was actually enthusiastic about that idea, which meets Ian halfway by still giving him something to take care of. Now for the elephant in the room: I think it's okay if Mickey never wants a kid, and there's a lot of issues ingrained in them that unless they go to therapy for a couple of years, hinder them from becoming perfect parents tbh. Now I'm not saying they'll be bad, but will their best be enough? Will they be content? Idk, I don't have any experience and I see them with more issues/flaws than the majority of the fandom? Honestly I just don't see that future for them (but I do enjoy kid AUs because who doesn't.) They'll stay on the West Side because I want them to get out but not stray too far from their family. I also can't think about them getting old or I'll sob, but I wrote a fic about how they'll retire and just live comfortably because it's what they deserve, and they'll take tons of vacations when they save up enough money.

oh my god that was way too much but in my defense i rarely get to rant abt them ok!! anyway now that I went through the whole spectrum of emotions, i'm tagging @michellemisfit, @lupeloto, @jademickian & @softmick 🚶‍♀️

[avartwork]

Thank You

I mostly focus on posting my artwork on here but I genuinely want to say thank you to everyone who enjoys what I do. It's been a big year of healing for me.

Since 2020 my mental health has been the worst it's ever been. Constant battles with the deepest depression, anxiety and self-loathing I can ever recall experiencing in my life. In 2020 I hoped we were entering a time where due to a crisis we as people could come together and be better. I did my best for people. I supported, I shared, I donated but during my time of need most people I knew left me behind for their own gains. I lost touch with people I cared about and thought cared about me. My job was a nightmare. I lost one of the few places I had left to hang out with friends. We lost a beloved family pet. In 2021 I spent a majority of it on suicide watch. I just couldn't function. I was broken and struggling and it was a genuine fight to get to a point where I could feel like I was just "ok" for even a day. In 2022 my job hit at an absolute low where the anxiety, frustration and the constant reminders of how little the world cares about people caused me to have a complete mental breakdown. My wife and I suffered two personal tragedies back to back involving pets. I still struggle with this. Still feel guilt and worry that I didn't do enough. On top of just feeling like people who I thought I could talk to didn't care after a point and I was doomed to just always be a bit part in people's lives. 2023 started off rough. Another family tragedy, getting left out of things from people I trusted...but this kind of broke to a point where I said I was done and started focusing on myself. I started disconnecting myself from the things that made me feel miserable and started focusing on indulging myself in whatever silly nonsense I enjoyed and best of all...people seemed to like it. I've been drawing some of my best works this year, both personal and fanart, that I've been getting nice compliments on. I have a collaboration in the works that I'm excited to share when it gets going. My streams have been a constant bright spot of fun and I can't begin to say how much I appreciate everyone who comes by and hangs out to listen to me talk, draw and hang out. I've been playing the drums again. Friendships have been healing.

I want people to know that you can hit the lowest of low points where you feel like everything is absolutely hopeless and you can survive it. You can come back from what you think is the worst possible scenarios and you CAN move forward and improve. I couldn't have done this without the support of people. Remember the people who care and hold on to them the best you can. Remind them you care about them even in the smallest ways.

I don't know what 2024 is going to bring. I'm dreading the political discourse and just how unhinged everything has become but I'm going to keep doing my best to try and be a positive spot on here and where ever else I am. Doing my best to make people laugh or give them a slight break. But all I can say is that this is probably the first holiday season in years where I haven't been struggling as much and I am grateful for that and everyone who helped me get here.

I try not to vent online anymore but I felt this was at least a more positive one. Nearing the end of the year and just everything I've experienced has had me thinking a lot and I wanted to get things out. I hope everyone can find their way through whatever is plaguing their lives and making them feel hopeless and miserable. If I can do it, anyone can.