#walter mckeys x female reader

[etfrin]

replacement | Keys x plus sized! fem! reader | teaser

okay guys, i am really nervous and excited to write/specify a certain (my own) body type in a fic and i really, really don't wanna fuck up. my fics don't describe body types, leaving it vague but i always wanted to write plus sized reader, something specific for me and people like me and since i am new at this, i am open to suggestions, any and whatsoever is helpful, but please for the sake of love, don't be mean abt it! and here's a Joe Keery gif because he cute af

it's the glasses ugh fuck

[beelicious-and-fictitious]

Getting Off

❤ A Valentine's Day Special! ❤

Summary || [Walter “Keys” McKeys X Female Reader SMUT] the cop arresting you is wearing a cock ring and you get out of trouble by bending over for him. 

Free City AU | 3.5k words | NO BETA/ SELF- EDITED, Swearing, Valentine’s Day Theme, Prompt: “Day Three + Walter McKeys + Ring,” Dubious Consent, Impersonating A Police Officer, Car Theft, Mentions of Toxic On-And-Off Relationship, Infidelity, Vibrating Sex Toy, Public Sex, Exhibitionism, Manhandling, Torn Clothes, Size Kink, From Behind, Hair Pulling, Rough Sex, Creampie (Please Use Protection IRL Use Condoms), Cockwarming

More Valentines! | Other Keery Fics | Main Masterlist 

Stupid fucking car. Stupid money hustling boyfriend. How hard is it to give a fuck about Valentine’s Day? It's one day a year! You have tried everything: begging, screaming, dropping hints like an anvil, sending yourself your own fucking flowers, making the dinner reservations and handing him the fuck details just so he shows up, fucking his best friend. But year after year, February 14th rolls on and your boyfriend does nothing. He was either stealing away to a basketball game, cajoling a client at his day job to buy into one of his entrepreneurships (which would fail like all the others had, or refused to leave the house gym because he had to “get swole.” 

The entrepreneur shit pisses you off the most– you are professional bank robbers! Who needs a legitimate job when crime pays so well?! 

So this year, you stole his favorite car! This particular make and model of super car went from 0 to 90 in a second flat, though you could tell from the way it accelerated and decelerated was weighed down by all the added armor plating. The paint job is obnoxious neon colors with the graphics from his shitty mandom podcast.

Now you could have stepped on the gas when the cop car behind you turned on their lights. You could probably make it by crossing over county lines and out of his jurisdiction. But you have had enough of car chases for a while and pull over instead. As long as your boyfriend hasn't reported it as stolen yet, you’re probably fine. 

A set of knuckles wraps on the window and you roll it down. “Afternoon officer, how can I–” 

“Turn the ignition off,” he interrupts you gruffly and leans down to glare at you. This part of Free City is flat and dry, no shade to hide you from the burning rays of the sun and air conditioning is the only thing keeping you from fainting, but you turn it off anyways, hoping he'll be quick about this stop given he should also be extremely hot, too. 

Slicked back chestnut brown hair and a comb for a mustache. His eyes were hidden by a pair of reflective aviators (of course), his shirt collar was open at the throat in the heat and his white undershirt glowed pristinely. His big, meaty hands were tucked by the thumbs into his utility belt, and your eyes dragged lustfully back up his lean torso to his freckled, handsome face– well he would be handsomer if he wasn’t wearing the meanest fucking scowl. 

“Got a hot date?,” he asks with sarcasm dripping from his voice. “That why you’re driving so fucking fast? 60’s not enough for you?” 

“‘M so sorry officer,” you say, distracted by a light buzzing sound (was that his radio maybe?). “I, like, dropped my phone and stupidly tried to pick it up and my foot pressed down on the gas and, and…” 

His uniform makes you double take. It’s tight on him– you only need to look at the bulge of his crotch to see that– but it’s also the wrong color for this area. That shade of navy blue is reserved for Free City’s urban jurisdiction… but he pulled you over in the sticks, nothing but desert and meth dens and old highways like the one you’re on. He should be wearing khaki, he should be a state trooper or something, right? And what the fucking is that buzzing! 

“Hey,” the weird cop snapped, “I said. License. And registration, ma’am.” 

Shit, shit, shit. It’s not your car and you were driving twice the speed limit and you can get in trouble anyways. “Yeah! Grabbing it! My license… but I should tell you this is my boyfriend's car, that’s why I'm not on the registration.” 

The cop– his name tag says Keys– hums mockingly. He snatches your wallet from your hands and walks back to his patrol car (also weird looking, might be missing decoration on the door but it could just be your position in the sun) without waiting for you to fumble for the registration. Fuck, fuck– this wouldn’t be the first time a cop fucking robbed you, how much cash did you have in that thing this time?!

You check the rearview mirror and see nothing but the cop's head looking down in the driver's seat, possibly entering something into his laptop– fuck again. You’ve got a record– who the fuck doesn’t have a record in this fucking city– so there’s no way you’ll get away with just a warning. Even a speeding ticket was seemingly unlikely given Officer Keys shit attitude. You need to have the registration before he gets back or he’ll become insufferable. 

“Okay,” you take a deep breath to calm down and pull the glove box handle, only to have it fall open and dump paper, dime bags, and guns into the passenger seat and onto the floor. “Oh, motherfucker!” 

There’s a gun– there’s two guns laying on the floor of the car in plain sight and a pissy cop who will be back any minute looking for probable cause to arrest you. You rip your hand back like the guns were going to explode and your blood pressure only raises more when you realize there’s no way to dig anything resembling a registration out of that mess without getting your ass shot. 

Defeated, you cover your face with your hands. Maybe you could get out of the car and drop straight to your knees. It would piss the cop off as he didn’t tell you to get out and he’d obviously fucking shoot at you but maybe he’d just graze you for climbing out instead of unloading his whole fucking clip if he finds you staying– 

A shadow falls over your body, one you feel rather than see as you the boiling directness of the sunlight washes away. “UHm…” 

You hear the cop sigh and pull your car door open. “Step out of the vehicle slowly and with your hands out.” 

The curses flooding your brain overwhelm you. It’s fucking Valentine’s Day! You should be sipping champagne and getting your back blown out in a luxury sized bathtub, not harassed by a city cop in the desert and taking the fall for your loser boyfriend’s coke and unregistered weapons. 

“I said get out of the car!” The cop grabs you with his thick hands (hands that you had, for half a second, wanted on you before you remember he’s a damn cop) wrapped around your thighs to drag you out faster.

“Okay, okay! I’m sorry, stop!” Shaking, you hold your hands out in front of you and try your best to roll your body off of your back on the very edge of the seat. He was the one who commanded you to move slowly, but now he was impatient and this time his big hands capture your waist, making you flinch a second before you are ripped upwards into his chest, nearly hitting your head on the low rise of the car cabin door. “I didn’t know that was in there! Jesus Christ!” 

You never expected to feel hatred when a hot man’s body was pressed against your back, but today you’ll make an exception for this prick. High off his authority, officer Keys kicks the car door closed with so much force that a cool breeze kicks up among the dust. Then he slams you bodily into the hot car body and probably delights in the angry shriek that leaves you. 

“You fucking asshole!” All the fear that had been bubbling in you earlier turns to anger for a moment and you try to push off the hot car to free yourself unsuccessfully. 

The cop groans in response– probably the weirdest thing about this exchange, it almost sounds… sexual? “Keep talking, baby. Maybe the courts will give you a nickel and a dime to serve!” 

He forces your arms up and behind your head and starts patting his belt for his handcuffs. He grunts, and this time it sounds repressed, like he was trying to keep it down… that’s when you realize the bump in his tight pants is pressing hard into you… and vibrating. 

Your mouth falls open and dries up instantly in the dry desert air. “...are you wearing a cock ring?” 

“What?” You can still hear him fumbling for the handcuffs, his other hand so tight on your wrists that it hurts. “Shut up.” 

You push back with your hips and feel him counter you– and you would have believed it was just him being pissy about you not holding still, if it weren’t for the way his hips roll at the end. Effectively rubbing his very hard cock into your ass to get some friction. It’s embarrassing when it suddenly feels like the hot air around you is suddenly inside of you, spinning into a ball and writhing like fighting cobras in your gut. 

You desparately need a way out of this dilemma and you may have found it. “Fuck me…” 

The cop hummed, slapping a silver cuff on your wrist. “What did you say?” 

“I said–” you pull your arms until your elbows graze the painfully hot roof of the car. Because your motion was unexpected, the cop startles and freezes when he feels your head lay on his shoulder. You can peer past his sunglasses at his indignant, brown eyes. “Fuck. Me. I don’t want to go to jail for my trash boyfriend, and you don’t want to be suspended for sexual deviancy on the job, do you? Win–Win.” 

“Who said I wanted to fuck you, huh?” The cop, less angry and more amused now, tightens the other cuff to your wrist and braces his hand on your chest. “If you’re stupid enough to steal your boyfriend’s car full of illegal shit and get pulled over, who’s to say you're not stupid enough to give me a venereal disease, you little slut?” 

You pout. “... I didn’t steal his car and I don’t have a disease. And don’t fucking call me a slut!” 

But officer Keys just laughs at your indignance. “Open your mouth for me, cupcake.” 

You do what he says cautiously and are instantly gagged by his fingers. You can taste dust on his dry skin as well as something foul like oil. It’s entirely reactionary when your teeth close around the intrusion, and officer Keys grunts and draws them back but not fully out. Now that you know what to expect, it only takes a second to relax and allow him to press his fingers deeper into your mouth again, struggling to fight back your gag reflex and remember how to take it. He’s testing you but it doesn’t take long for you to ease into it, even sucking on them and swirling your tongue for him. 

“Atta girl,” the cop purrs, “yeah, yeah. Oh, I can work with this. You can deepthroat, right? You’re gonna need to be able to swallow the whole sword.” 

You nod your head and then find yourself suddenly unbalanced. The officer’s fingers pull free with a wet pop and he takes a massive step back from where he was crushing you against the car. You are stopped from falling by the very strong grip that takes hold at the back of your neck and he commands you to drop to your knees. Hot car, hot pavement, by the end of this, you’re going to have burns and bruises. You delicately squat instead of kneeling, wishing you had your knee pads or a jacket to throw down for protection but Keys is already unbuckling his belt. 

Your lip curls impatiently as you wait for him to finish pulling his dick out. A part of you wants to smack the sunglasses right off his face or pull his gun and shoot him, but you know it’ll do you no good in the long run. And as he uncovers his junk, the sound of vibrating gets louder. There's a wet patch on his underwear that you immediately forget about when he pulls the waistband down and his fat cock pops up. 

"Jesus Christ–"you gasp and try to protect your mouth, turning away from the sight before you but unable to tear away completely. 

It appears Keys is a meticulous groomer below the belt, too. The cock ring is glittery cyan blue, a ring around his balls and another around his cock making them both flushed red and veiny. You watch him twist the vibrating plate around his swollen flesh and use his other hand to pull back his foreskin. 

"Hey! Tick tock, cupcake," he says as he winds his hand in your hair and starts to pull you forward. "I'm on the clock and we're running out of daylight." 

Time to work for your freedom.  

Gathering saliva in your mouth, you wrap a hand around the base (fuck, your fingers don’t touch your thumb) and with your other hand still cuffed, you push the vibrating plate to his balls. Keys pulls his phone from his pocket and turns up the vibe via remote app, causing his hips to jerk and leave a wet smear of pre-cum under your nose. 

“Okay deep breath, baby.” The hand in your hair pushes you forward and despite the warning, you still gag when he slides right back and hits the back of your throat. “Uho, more.” 

He barely pulls back to let you suck in a new breath before he’s back at it, pushing you down on him despite your squirming resistance until your nose is buried in his short pubes. Your hands drop to his thighs and your nails leave red scratches on the pale white skin, tears gathering on your lashes until you are able to take one shaking breath through your nose. 

You should be mad, but the simpering whine he makes fills you with pride instead. It was impressive for you to take all that cock on one go. Your sex pulses with need and you don’t even notice your knees are on the hot pavement. 

“Swallow, baby, come on,” he praises as he looks down at you, his sunglasses moved off his sweaty nose to his head so he can better. 

Your jaw aches fiercely but you manage to obey and Keys’ moans at the feeling of your throat constricting his length. “Good girl, fuck.” 

Finally, Keys releases you and you’re able to gasp and cough and catch your breath while you stroke him to keep him happy. Your preferences for servicing him begin to shift as you feel your underwear slicken and stick to your outer lips. The last time you had good dick was probably that bank bathroom mid-heist (that janitor was packing just like this). This cop may be a complete asshole and a pervert, but damn it a huge dick was always going to do something for you! 

“Officer?” Keys looks down at you with slight disdain. He does admire the glistening drool on your chin and the wetness of your lashes, and he’s quickly distracted by your leaning back to squeeze your breast over your top. You’re going to ask him for something he fully intends to deny you until… 

“I’m so wet, please please…” you bite your lip unconsciously and make him watch you touch yourself to tell him about your soaked panties. “You can fuck me as hard as you want, don’t even need a condom, baby, please…” 

Officer Keys seemed to like the sound of that very, very much. He hauls you to your feet and walks you backwards twenty feet to his patrol cruiser. Still handcuffed, you can’t do much except obey and try not to trip over your own feet and fall. He keeps a tight hand on your arm as he swings open a door in the back before shoving you in halfway. You feel him yank your bottoms down your thighs and spit on your slick and puffy folds. 

“O-ho, baby,” he cooes almost mockingly and runs a calloused thumb over your clit, “how bad did you need to be fucked? You are one lucky girl that I pulled you over, aren’t you?” 

You try to answer him but he smacks your pussy and you shriek instead. 

“Just breathe, sweetheart,” he says, stroking his length still dripping with saliva, “nice and easy…” 

And then you feel the head of his cock pressed against your entrance and realize he is not going to stretch you out first even with that monster. On a long exhale, you force your body to relax but still you squeal a little as you feel him begin to fill your channel. For all his perverse snarling and coldness, he does exhibit some level of mercy as he doesn’t make you take too much all at once. It’s still a bit of a painful stretch but he moves slowly right up until he bottoms out inside you and growls loudly. 

“Goddamn!” You feel him grind against your hips and the cock ring vibe bumps your clit adding pleasure over the slight pain. “Haven’t fucked a pussy this tight since the Penris Bank robbery.” 

He starts moving in you, but your mind is somewhere else. Penris Bank has only ever been successfully robbed once in thirty years. You did that– I mean, you and your crew did that. Walked away with 20 mil each. Okay, your crew robbed the bank while you got your back blown out in the executive office bathroom suite. Hold the fucking phone– 

“Oh my god, you’re not a fucking cop!” In the blink of an eye, you realize how blind you’ve been. How could you forget that dick? Just because it was cosplaying as a police officer? So stupid. “Fucking asshole!” 

You try to struggle out of his grasp, but Janitor Keys adjusts his grip on your hips and lifts you up until your legs are kicking uselessly and he’s spear heading his cock into your g-spot. And as angry as you are, you can’t resist the coiling fire in your gut turning your arms to jelly or punching some high pitched moans out of you. 

“That’s it, kitten, purr!” Keys laughs and fucks you faster. “You missed this dick, huh baby?” 

You grumble and he smacks your ass so hard it stings. “I can’t hear you, bitch, did you miss this dick?!” 

“Yes,” you cry and drop your chin to your chest and throw your head back when he starts furiously circling your clit. “Yes, fuck! No one fucks me like you do–” 

“Fucking A’ right, baby…” 

Your feet find purchase on the car floor allowing you to brace against the heavy assault and push back, taking him even deeper. If a car packed full of people wolf whistling and shouting obscenities drove by, you hardly noticed, except for Keys' prideful wave as they disappeared. 

"Fuck, fuck," your stomach tightened painfully and tears gathered on your lashes. The bumping of the cock ring vibe slapping against your clit does you in and you collapse, gushing all over your partner's cock and soaking his pants. 

You feel lightheaded as you are gently laid out in the backseat of the faux cop car on your stomach with Keys cock still deep inside you. It only takes him three or four thrusts before he stills with a grunt and pumps you full of his cum. One of his hands rubs your back just like he had done when he finished on your stomach at the bank. 

Damn, you really had missed him. 

Catching your breath, you lift your head and turn a bit, then smack him across his face. Keys looks at you wide eyed, sunglasses gone and fake mustache peeling off his upper lip. 

"Ow…" He swallows and ducks his head to mumble, "okay, I guess I deserved that. Sorry."

You lay your head on your arms, feeling exhaustion wash over you as the role play ends. 

"...you know if you want, you can come over to my place and uh," Keys voice drifts off as he traces shapes on the soft skin between your shoulder blades. "I've got this huge bathtub in my penthouse thanks to the cut you gave me. We can, I dunno, throw some rose petals everywhere and drink champagne since it's Valentine's day." 

You lift your head again and give him a puzzled look. "Why would you do that?" 

Keys is a great actor because the way he blushes now is so sincere that you almost forget he was manhandling you not five minutes ago. 

"Because I like you, and you deserve it…?" 

Well, if your shit boyfriend wasn't going to spend Valentine's day with you… "fuck it, sure. But you need to clean this up and tell me what the fuck you are doing in a cop uniform!" 

Keys finally pulls his overstimulated cock out, leaving you empty and leaking but he massages your sore flesh to ease the slight pain. "Happy to tell you everything! We've got all night, if you want." 

And he leans over you one more time to plant a kiss on your temple before climbing back to eat his cum out of you. 

It looks like you are in for a great Valentine's day!

More Valentines! | Main Masterlist

So I was deadass going to scrap this entire fic several times, but I feel like I managed to work around the whole "fucking a cop" aspect. Drop a like if you liked this and leave a comment or anon ask if you wanna let me know what you liked about it!

[blckbrrybasket]

𓆩 𓉸 𓆪 Kinktober 2024

• MDNI! porn with little plot

• all of these are x reader with no use of y/n

• both female and gender neutral readers featured

꒰33k+ words total꒱

1st. — “Hotter than a Burning Fire”

        -> Face sitting + Inexperience, Robin Buckley

2nd. — “Give and Take”

        -> Squirting + Edging, Steve Harrington 

3rd. — “Bite her Hip”

        -> Caught + Hate Sex, Nancy Wheeler

4th. — “Yer Killin’ Me”

        -> Boot Worship, Arthur Morgan

5th. — “Girls on Film”

        -> Being Filmed, Mickey Altieri

6th. — “Heaven in Your Mouth”

        -> Throat Fucking + Breath Play, Rafe Cameron

7th. — “Closer”

        -> Mutual Masturbation + Forbidden, Robin Buckley 

8th. — “Oh Honey”

        -> First Time + Domination, Kurt Kunkle

9th. — “Hearts a Mess”

        -> Public Sex + Gag, Art Donaldson

10th. — “Ghosting”

        -> Under the table, Javier Peña

11th. — “Burning For You”

        -> Sleepy Sex + Cockwarming, Sejanus Plinth

12th. — “She’s in Parties”

        -> High sex, Rafe Cameron

13th. — “Melting With You”

        -> Double Penetration, Stu and Mickey

14th. — “As You Are”

        -> 69, Ellie Williams

15th. — “Of Love For Love”

        -> Cream Pie + Cum Play, John ‘Soap’ MacTavish

16th. — “Maneater”

        -> Dacryphilia + Masochism, Kurt Kunkle

17th. — “What I Need”

        -> Degradation + Cum Eating, Ethan Landry

18th. — “I was made for loving you”

        -> Praise Kink + Body Worship, Steve Harrington 

19th. — “Takin’ Time”

        -> Spanking + Orgasm Denial, Joel Miller

20th. — “Sweet As Whiskey”

        -> Blood Kink + Period, Vampire!Eddie Munson

21st. — “Wind You Up”

        -> Hair Pulling + Rough Sex, Trevor (Hellraiser)

22nd. — “Eyes On Me”

        -> Bondage + Femdom, Agent Whiskey

23th. — “Show and I’ll Learn”

        -> Sex Toys, Robin Buckley

24th. — “If You Knew”

        -> Overstimulation + Wet Dream, Joel Miller

25th. — “Hell And You”

        -> Mask Kink + Knife Kink, Stu Macher

26th. — “You’ve Got Me Now”

        -> Dry Humping + Tipsy Sex, Eddie Munson

27th. — “Happy Birthday, Baby”

        -> Lingerie + On The Counter, Walter ‘Keys’ McKey

28th. — “Quit While Ahead”

        -> Pussy slapping, Rafe Cameron

29th. — “Love My Way”

        -> Scissoring, Tara Carpenter

30th. — “Suck It Up”

        -> Marking + Possessiveness, Love Quinn

31st. — “Body Electric”

        -> Cucking + Breeding Kink, Eddie Munson and Steve Harrington

taglist closed!

[writethrough]

Requests Closed

Hey all!

My requests are closed for the time being so I can focus on getting through my inbox. Please ignore the below information until requests are reopened.

Updated: January 8, 2024

Characters I write for:

DC's Titans - Conner Kent

Castlevania - Adrian "Alucard" Tepes, Hector, Trevor Belmont, Vlad "Dracula" Tepes

Free Guy - Walter "Keys" McKey

Howl's Moving Castle - Howl

Lucifer - Lucifer Morningstar

Prodigal Son - Malcolm Bright

The Sandman - Morpheus

Stranger Things - Billy Hargrove, Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington

9-1-1 - Evan Buckley

I will slowly add more as I narrow down my WIP.

Content I will write:

SFW / Suggestive Situations

Female / Gender-Neutral Readers

Fluff / Angst (Angst will most likely end in fluff)

Content I will not write:

NSFW

Real Person Fics

Character x Character

Physical Descriptions of Reader

Reader Pregnancy / Having Children

I think that's all I wanted to cover. I will update this post when requests are closed or if any of the above criteria expands and/or changes.

As always, thank you to those who've requested fics and who will request them in the future. I love doing this! It makes me so happy to see your ideas and I'm glad I can have a small hand in making them come to life!

[heresathreebee]

Walter "Keys" McKeys | Free Guys (2021) || Group Sex // Overstimulation 

Established Relationship (coworkers); 2.3k words; NO BETA/ SELF- EDITED; Swearing, Work-Related Stress, Public Bathroom Sex, Anal Plugs, Overstimulation, Creampie

Previous | Masterlist | Next: Prince Paul Bath/ Shower Sex & Intercrural Sex

Crunch time at Soonami Games was killer on its programmers but especially Keys. He's the type of workaholic who already puts in double the hours of an average person and still proves time and time again that that is only a fraction of his power. He forgets he’s still human and is therefore required to provide maintenance on his body like shower, sleep, eat etc in order to function. 

He is getting better at it– for your sake. As long as he clocks off on time and showers before bed every night, he is allowed to wake up as early as he wants to get back to work. You also work at Soonami modeling characters and have started talking shop in your sleep to your boyfriend’s concern (and partial amusement). 

“...the rig is fucked, he’s walking like a horse…”

Half asleep, Keys turns his head to find you drooling on your pillow. “...what?” 

“...if I catch you again, I'm going to throw you down the job hole…”

Keys snorta as he rubs sleep sand out of his eyes. Ah yes, the job hole. You’ve told him in a few of your work dreams, getting fired involves people either getting ‘sacked’ (hit in the face with a bag of hay) or ‘canned’ (thrown down an endless hole in the middle of the bullpit office). It was funny, but it also meant you were stressing out to the point that work was never off your mind. 

Plus, you weren’t wearing your bonnet to bed and he knew how pissed off you got when you had to detangle your hair. 

“Babe,” Keys said hoarsely and gently shook your shoulder. “Hey, get up.” 

You swat his arm away and roll over but it’s too late– you’re awake now and unlikely to get back to sleep. The best way Keys knows how to get you to relax is sex or a spa day, but neither of you have time for that with a dozen looming deadlines over your heads. He changes into day clothes while you use the bathroom and digs through your shared closet looking for a good belt to use. Instead, he stumbles upon your toy chest which neither of you have gotten to play with in an age. Maybe there’s something in here you two can use to relax.

…

You exit the bathroom with a sigh and start to pull on a new shirt. 

“Wait,” Keys slides your shirt back off and hands you a different outfit. “Can you wear this today?” 

You glare between him and the floral romper. It’s short on you, with a plunge neckline, flouncy sleeves, and zippable pockets. “Why? Need some eye candy for when you’re slacking off?” 

“I never slack off,” he pretends to scold you. Then he wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you close, a move you can never resist. “I was thinking we could… play a game today?” 

“Does this game involve locking Antwon in a closet and taking over the company?,” you ask as you brush your lips against his chin. 

“Even better,” he says and dips his head to give you a real, passionate kiss that, realistically, neither of you have time for. “Now put it on. I have one other thing I want you to wear.” 

…

Never in a million years would you have expected your mild mannered, code obsessed boyfriend to suggest wearing remote control vibrating buttplugs to work (yes, he has one too. It wasn’t a part of his original plan, but you felt it was only fair). The controller feels heavy in your pocket and you keep adjusting it suspiciously, like a boner you’re trying to hide. Your phone text tone chirps and you look to see a new message. 

Keys: Stop touching your hip you look like youre hiding a weapon lol

Annoyed, you turn around to where you know Keys' desk is only to find it empty. A sharp tingle shocks your spine as the plug you’re wearing comes to life and just as quickly disappears again. The girl at the coffee pot next to you stares. 

“Sorry,” you chuckle nervously, “ghost walked over my grave.” 

Her eyebrows wave and she scrambles away, and you finally find the culprit you were looking for hiding behind a load bearing pillar and muffling his laughter with his hand. 

Dickhead, you use text-to-speech and send a message back. 

“What did you call me?” 

You whip around to find your fucking boss. “I didn’t call you anything, Antwon. I didn’t even know you were there. Do you need something?” 

You squeeze your thighs together as Keys turns the plug back on and sets it to a whispering buzz that only you can hear. This fucking toy has some range on it, at least 20-30 feet, you’ll give the creators credit for that. Antwon yammers on about production and deadlines and you respond with the same boring employee drivel about making good progress. 

“I want those rigs fixed,” he says and pokes your chest dramatically. It annoys the hell out of you and you have to bite your lip to stop from punching him in the jaw. Especially because the plug has your arousal rising– making your thin underwear sticky and your nipples hard. “Have them turned into me by tonight, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” you reply through gritted teeth. 

As you are walking back to your desk, you feel the vibe pulse– short short short short, pause, short long, pause, short short short short, pause, short long– then turn completely off. You pull up a wiki page for morse code and try to ignore the needy pulse of your sex and the pleasant pressure of the plug moving once you sit down. 

The wiki informs you that your boyfriend says “H A H A”

You glare at him over your screen and watch his self-satisfied smile drop. 

…

Keys forgot how competitive you got during simple games. He goes to take a drink of his coffee and yelps as the plug that he’s wearing comes to life on the highest setting possible, loud and strong and borderline painful, forcing him to spill his drink all down his shirt (which thankfully grew cold while it sat on his desk for two hours). Mouser laughs at Keys from the other side of the desk and slaps his knee. 

“Man, what the hell is wrong with you, dude?” 

“UH, I saw a SPIDER,” Keys face flushes beet red and his cock hardens just before the vibe gradually turns down and off with somehow only the victim as the wiser. “Thought I saw… thought I saw a spider. It’s uh gone now… or it wasn’t uh really there.” 

“I’m gonna go get cleaned up,” he sighs and heads off to the bathroom. 

Keys tries to catch your eye at your desk, but you pretend to be engrossed in the work on your monitor and he leaves to try and wipe the coffee stains out of his good button up. The vibe resumes, this time at a pleasant bump, bump, bump that is tolerable but would make him walk funny if he moved too fast. 

It’s not long before the bathroom door swings open and you appear in the mirror, smug as you caress your greedy hands around the clean parts of his shirt. 

“That was uncalled for,” he complains, “I liked this shirt!” 

You kiss up and down his neck, paying extra attention to his sweet spots and none to his words. Your hand gives the outline of his cock a gentle squeeze before it slips into his pocket and withdrawals the secondary remote. Keys finishes undoing the buttons on his shirt and takes it off, giving up on getting his khakis cleaned but grateful he wore a black shirt underneath. 

“I know you tested these the day we got them,” you hum thoughtfully. “Which setting do you think would be my favorite?” Keys hits the button like he’s already thought about it– always known– and a thrumming sensation which ebbs and flows like a tide fills you. You hum in approval and meld your body to his back, “when you’re right, you’re right.” 

Playing this game at work was turning out to be a real production killer. It wouldn’t be long before Antwon’s little yes man comes crashing down on Keys head asking why his typing was at half speed the average. You both need to get your heads in the game, and maybe you’ll just make time for a couple quickies in the shower. 

Keys tangles his fingers into yours and leans back to whisper in your ear, “I need to be inside you, right now.” 

You fight the urge to moan and pull him into the nearest stall. Once the door is locked, he’s pressing up against you and the wall and kissing you feverishly. Getting Keys riled up before sex always leads to the most satisfying fucks of your life and you cream a little more knowing neither of you are going to last long. 

“Fuck. Turn around.” Keys hand coaxes you to face the wall and you both reach down to fix your clothes out of the way. You hold the crotch of your flowy romper and drenched panties aside while he grips himself by the base of his cock and slides in. Your left hands meet at the lip of the divider wall and tangle over one another, you groan simultaneously as he bottoms out in your pussy. His voice in your ear alone almost sends you over the edge. “Fuck, always so ready for me, and still so tight… I’m not gonna be able to pull out, ok?” 

You’re already walking around with uncomfortably tacky shorts, what’s one more fluid mixed into the mess? “Ok, ok. Now fuck me, baby…” 

Keys pounds into you as much as he can while trying to be quiet. The vibrating plugs pick up the slack and drive you both closer and closer to climax together. It’s just as his right hand is covering your mouth to muffle your pitchy moans that the bathroom door gets kicked open. 

“- CAN’T BELIEVE THIS, JERR BEAR, I REALLY CAN’T” 

Both of you freeze as you hear Antwon’s voice booming off the walls. The last thing you wanted to be was caught getting dicked down by your boyfriend, who also happens to be Antwon’s favorite programmer, in the middle of the busiest time of the year.

You hear the sink turn on and peek through the gap in the door to see Antwon’s back to you and a bluetooth wireless earbud in his ear. He’s on the phone, not coming to fire you (yet). 

“YOU TELL JAMIE LEE CURTIS THAT SHE AND HER DOG ARE UNINVITED TO MY BIRTHDAY PARTY. YES I’M SERIOUS–”

Keys hisses through his teeth and rests his chin on your shoulder. It’s a struggle to stay still, but he’s worried pulling out would be worse. He bites back a groan when he feels your pussy clench on him and your free hand frantically tapping his thigh. He crushes you into the wall to try and convey that he needs you to stay still, but you ignore him and turn your face and whisper shout, 

“You left the remote on the counter, you idiot!” 

Keys doesn’t even have time to panic as he feels you clench in his arms– this time he can feel the end of your plug, which is pressed into his pelvic bone, as the vibration doubles in intensity and forces you to come instantly. 

His hand clamps over your mouth and nose to keep your scream silent, your boss hasn’t left yet. He’s actually gotten closer, as in he has entered the stall next to you. There are not enough expletives in the English language to convey how absolutely fucked the two of you are. 

“I’m just saying, Jerr, that if Madonna and Katy Perry can rock cone-shaped brassiers, than so can I…” 

Keys releases your face to let you breathe, and due to the endless pulsing of your pussy, he has to bite your shoulder as he comes too, pumping his seed in your warmth that splatters against the floor as he accidentally slips out. His eyes roll back in relief and embarrassment as all it would take to notice the mess is for Antwon to accidentally look down. 

“Hey,” the dread voicecame again.

You were laying your head back on Keys’ shoulder, exhausted, but opened your eyes wide when you heard somebody address you from above. Antwon looks down at you from over the wall, his hand inches from where yours and Keys was tangled. Keys looks up too and freezes. 

“... While I admire the enthusiasm you two have for kinky office sex–” he points an accusatory finger at you, “save it for after crunch time!”

You both nod stupidly but can’t really move, still in disbelief. 

“That means get back to work!” 

…

You don’t talk about it until you’re getting out of the car in front of your shared apartment. “I cannot believe we weren’t fired today!” 

Keys laughed with you. “I know!” 

You got in the apartment and kicked off your shoes, shuffling to the bedroom and flopping down face first. 

“Did you ever get the remote back,” Keys asked as he shucked off his clothes. 

“Nope,” you said into the comforter, “I tossed the plug into the garbage at lunch. That’s $40 down the drain…” 

“At least you could have had some mercy for me,” he said, and peeled his boxers off of his crotch where a few of his loads were drying. “I came so many times I had nothing left to give! It was a ghost load!” 

You rolled over like a lazy cat and stretched with an evil laugh. “Good. I loved watching you get up to get another coffee. Legs shaking like a newborn deer.” 

“Fuck, you.” He leans over you on his hands and kisses you deeply. “So what do you say? Bath, takeout, bed?” 

“We’re calling in sick tomorrow,” you say. 

“No way,” he reprimands you, “we’re going to fuck all night after work and then we’ll call out sick on Friday. Deal?” 

“Deal.”

Previous | Masterlist | Next: Prince Paul Bath/ Shower Sex & Intercrural Sex

Antwon "I can look past kinky sex on my public property but I can NOT excuse fucking during work hours" LastNameHere

[munsster]

Hi again! I have this idea for a Walter Keys (x fem!reader) fic where Keys buys the reader a puppy for her birthday and he has to go and get this puppy and all its toys and then hide it before she gets home from work. I can just imagine Keys running around his apartment chasing a little chocolate Labrador puppy or something and then the reader gets home and he surprises her with it but it's just CHAOS.

of course, you don't have to write it, but I thought it was a cute idea!

keys surprising you with a dog

A/N: THIS IS SO CUTE IM BLUBBERING LIKE A LITTLE BABY OVER IT (also i did it in headcanon format bc it felt right) SORRY I FORGOT ABOUT THE BIRTHDAY PART but it can still b read that way!!

Warnings: just fluff, cursing, a kiss, pure chaos and i love it

he definitely felt like you were dropping hints and you were NOT subtle about it

“omg look at that perfect little puppy” + *bombards his messages with pics of little doggies* + “DOG!” x100 + “don’t you just love dogs?”

but he’s pretty sure you don’t know that he knows that you know what you’re doing

tldr; he’s getting you a dog

he’s spent WEEKS scrolling thru adoption ads online and scouring shelters for the bestest boy and then

looking for a loving home: misha! chocolate lab, 7 month old, friendly/affectionate/playful, vaccines up-to-date

with the sweetest little face and a picture of him playing catch

like COME ON

you know keys immediately called the number and sped on over to the address they sent for this pup

misha sat in the passenger’s seat the whole way home, and keys quickly found out he likes the spice girls

they’re already best friends and it was only a four hour drive

……. he’s committed

only he didn’t consider: food, bowls, a bed, toys, leash, etc.

so the journey is back on, and you’re off work soon

lets misha trot around the store picking out his favorite toys (chooses the loudest, most squeaky ones and is grinning like a bastard the entire time)

picks out a matching collar + leash and a fluffy bed and like 100 pounds of dog food

needless to say, he may or may not have spent almost $1000 that day

no matter ‘cause the look on your face is gonna be priceless, he can already tell

then he lets misha off his leash and into the apartment

and he’s off

sprinting into the bedroom and out again, barking at nothing, bouncing off the walls, he’s got the ZOOMIES for sure

and keys is just standing in the front doorway, leash in hand like……. what have i done

apartment: trashed

so now he’s chasing after the ball of energy, picking up knocked over books and a lamp and trying to get the shoe out of his mouth when he hears

“… i’m home”

all while he’s crouched by the arm of the couch, eyes wide, and turned over his shoulder to smile at you

“surprise?”

and the dog comes SPRINTING out of nowhere, completely mowing him over, flattening him on the carpet

and keys just groans because he can hear you laughing while the dog laps at his face

you set your stuff down and kick the door closed and are DOUBLED over looking at this fully grown man with a dog wiggling around on top of him and nearly suffocating him

and you’re just kneeling down next to them and scratching the dog’s head while keys is playing dead and you’re like

“who’s this little guy?” “the devil” “awww, such a good boy, what’s your name, bub?” “it’s misha. and he’s insane” “hi, misha!!”

and the puppy hops into your lap and you have to hold him back from climbing you like a tree

he’s such a sweetie, and keys is still recovering

then misha sits down in your lap and is panting and nudging your hand until you pet him more 🥺🥺

“so who are we dogsitting for?”

“we’re not”

and you just laugh and shake your head while keys wipes the slobber off his face and sits up

“ha ha very funny. who?”

but keys just stares at you with that little stupid smirk and you look up from the dog and your face go so serious

keys is scared

“he’s ours?” “mhm”

and you just hug the little puppy and are literally on the verge of tears and grabbing keys by the back of his neck to give him a big kiss

and misha starts barking up at the two of you

and you pull away laughing with keys holding your hand

“he’s ours”

masterlist

taglist:

@milkiane

[piastrinorris]

Individuals I will write:

Eddie Munson ♥

Steve Harrington ♥

Robin Buckley ♥ (provided reader is female-coded)

Nancy Wheeler

Jonathan Byers

Argyle (provided the story isn’t heavily based upon getting high)

Eden Bingham (provided the story isn’t heavily based upon getting high)

Chrissy Cunningham

Jim Hopper

Joyce Byers

Dr Alexei

Dmitri Antonov/“Enzo”

Polycules I will write:

Steve/Eddie x Reader ♥

Jonathan/Nancy x Reader ♥

Nancy/Robin x Reader ♥

Argyle/Eden x Reader

Jonathan/Argyle x Reader

Joyce/Hopper x Reader

Ships I will write:

Steve x Eddie

Robin x Nancy

Jonathan x Argyle

Steve x Chrissy

Eddie x Nancy

Robin x Vickie

Jonathan x Chrissy

Argyle x Eden

Jonathan x Nancy

Chrissy x Robin

Joyce x Hopper

Smut will only be written under the context that characters are 18+.

Please do not ask for anyone who is not on this list. I will happily write The Party as side characters, but I WILL NOT write any of them as love interests.

Non-Stranger Things characters I will write:

Ralph (Timewasters) ♥

Tom Grant (Make Up)

Kurt Kunkle (Spree) ♥

Walter "Keys" McKey (Free Guy)

Genres I will write:

fluff ♥

smut ♥

hurt/comfort

angst (it’s a bit of a weak spot but I’ll give it a go)

fix-it fics

AUs

NSFW - Kinks I won’t write:

Rape/CNC/Dubcon

Anything involving any bodily functions that don’t come naturally with sex (piss/scat/blood etc)

Knife/gun/weapon play

Dacryphilia

Ageplay/incest (but I might throw the occasional “daddy” in there for you if you really want it)

Raceplay

I’m down to write most other things, in pretty much any D/s dynamic. I still reserve the right to turn down requests if my forgetful ass hasn’t included it in the list, though.

[etfrin]

TIME FOR THE RAGING CONFESSIONS AND THE HUNGRY KISSES | TEASER | <3 | replacement [keys x fem! reader]

[etfrin]

replacement | keys x plus sized! fem! reader | teaser

WE'RE CLOSER TO THE SMUT YAY :D

also i am gonna get busy soon with school acting up so yay (not) to that too

[etfrin]

angst, soft, fluff, angry confessions and smut coming soon

<3

i love being an author especially at times like this, i start to hyperfixate on a character and imagine shit and wow?? i can write it out?? and be as self indulgent as possible because i am the author?? damn

it's the damn glasses for me, as a person who wears glasses, i love when men wear glasses fr and he's a coder (is that a word?) so he's smart and that's incredibly attractive

and what a surprise, it's not only villains i can have a crush on (this was sarcastic dbdjsjj)

i need to finish my damn homework and come back from my tutors' first, gonna write this whole night if i have too

[beelicious-and-fictitious]

Joe Keery Character Masterlist

Main Masterlist

This is a collection of my all of my fics written as pairings for Joe Keery’s characters. All NSFW fics are marked as SMUT!

This list is currently just Kinktober prompts, however I am actively writing new Keery and Quinn fics as we speak!

Reader Insert Fics

Steve Harrington from Stranger Things (2014-present)

Day Four: Breathplay & Missionary | 2.5k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | you are sexually repressed and obsessed with Steve Harrington

Clinomania | 2.5k words 🔥 SMUT 🔥 | You're having trouble leaving the comfort of your bed, but best boyfriend Steve is happy to start Valentine's Day anywhere

My Big Shot, My Star | 5.6k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Your movie star boyfriend Steve takes you out for a date on Valentine's day in Hollywood

Day Seven: Costumes & Sex Toys | 2.5k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Steve gives subbing for his girlfriend (you) in a dress one more time

Day Eight: Creampie | 1.6k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | riding your boyfriend Steve in his parent's garage

Day Nine: Double Penetration (+ Eddie Munson) | 3.6k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | you and your boyfriend Steve take Eddie to a secluded campsite with a sexy ulterior motive

Day Eighteen: Bondage & Lingerie (+ Eddie Munson) | 4.2k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | you and your boyfriends Eddie and Steve roleplay a darker version of your D&D characters

Day Twenty Three: Orgasm Denial | 1.6k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | tutoring your high school crush Steve in your college dorm room

Kurt Kunkle from Spree (2020)

Day Fourteen: Love Bites/Marks | 2.2k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | helping the Kunkles move and playing a super perverted game with their adult son

Fire Hazard | 5.3k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | It's Valentine's Day and you are having second thoughts about what you want from your boyfriend

Day Twelve: Hate/Angry Sex | 1.9k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | alone with a dangerous, bored, and very horny convicted murder

Day Twenty One: Nipple Play | 2.5k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | sequel to Day 14; getting braver with your game and touching each other with his parents in the room

Day Twenty Two: Object Insertion & Phone Sex | 2.6k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Camboy sub Kurt preforms a special livestream

Day Twenty Five: Sex Pollen | 4k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Kurt contracts a temporary medical condition, and as his best friend, you are determined to help him through it

Day Twenty Eight: Formal Wear & Strap-Ons | 2k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | getting kinky at an influencer costume party

Stuck | 2.3k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | you drop something and get stuck grabbing it, but your boyfriend Kurt's here to give you a hand (and then some)

Walter "Keys" McKeys from Free Guy (2021)

Day Fifteen: Overstimulation | 2.3k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | you and your boyfriend Keys do some semi-public sex shit at the office

Getting Off | 3.5k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | The "cop" arresting you is wearing a cock ring and you get out of trouble by bending over for him

Day Five: Leather/Latex | 1.1k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Keys gets some one-on-one with his favorite camgirl

Day Seventeen: Licking | 2.2k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Keys pays for the girlfriend experience

\\Return to Main Masterlist for more fics by yours truly//

Day Twenty Six: Wax Play | 3.8k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | Keys is nervous about a date and asks for help with some hair removal

Nurse Jack from Alter's How To Be Alone (short film 2020)

Spicing Things Up | 5.3k words 🔥SMUT🔥 | You introduce your boyfriend Jack to your extraterrestrial appendages

-------------------------------------------------------

[heresathreebee]

SHAMELESS SELF REBLOG:

Hello sinners! ❤ If you haven't seen this already, I am posting Valentine's Day Smut on my writing blog @beelicious-and-fictitious daily until the 14th!

This week is Joe Keery themed and next week is Joseph Quinn! You can check them out if you need a good read and leave some love in the comments or just reblog them to share ❤

Getting Off

❤ A Valentine's Day Special! ❤

Summary || [Walter “Keys” McKeys X Female Reader SMUT] the cop arresting you is wearing a cock ring and you get out of trouble by bending over for him. 

Free City AU | 3.5k words | NO BETA/ SELF- EDITED, Swearing, Valentine’s Day Theme, Prompt: “Day Three + Walter McKeys + Ring,” Dubious Consent, Impersonating A Police Officer, Car Theft, Mentions of Toxic On-And-Off Relationship, Infidelity, Vibrating Sex Toy, Public Sex, Exhibitionism, Manhandling, Torn Clothes, Size Kink, From Behind, Hair Pulling, Rough Sex, Creampie (Please Use Protection IRL Use Condoms), Cockwarming

More Valentines! | Other Keery Fics | Main Masterlist 

Stupid fucking car. Stupid money hustling boyfriend. How hard is it to give a fuck about Valentine’s Day? It's one day a year! You have tried everything: begging, screaming, dropping hints like an anvil, sending yourself your own fucking flowers, making the dinner reservations and handing him the fuck details just so he shows up, fucking his best friend. But year after year, February 14th rolls on and your boyfriend does nothing. He was either stealing away to a basketball game, cajoling a client at his day job to buy into one of his entrepreneurships (which would fail like all the others had, or refused to leave the house gym because he had to “get swole.” 

The entrepreneur shit pisses you off the most– you are professional bank robbers! Who needs a legitimate job when crime pays so well?! 

So this year, you stole his favorite car! This particular make and model of super car went from 0 to 90 in a second flat, though you could tell from the way it accelerated and decelerated was weighed down by all the added armor plating. The paint job is obnoxious neon colors with the graphics from his shitty mandom podcast.

Now you could have stepped on the gas when the cop car behind you turned on their lights. You could probably make it by crossing over county lines and out of his jurisdiction. But you have had enough of car chases for a while and pull over instead. As long as your boyfriend hasn't reported it as stolen yet, you’re probably fine. 

A set of knuckles wraps on the window and you roll it down. “Afternoon officer, how can I–” 

“Turn the ignition off,” he interrupts you gruffly and leans down to glare at you. This part of Free City is flat and dry, no shade to hide you from the burning rays of the sun and air conditioning is the only thing keeping you from fainting, but you turn it off anyways, hoping he'll be quick about this stop given he should also be extremely hot, too. 

Slicked back chestnut brown hair and a comb for a mustache. His eyes were hidden by a pair of reflective aviators (of course), his shirt collar was open at the throat in the heat and his white undershirt glowed pristinely. His big, meaty hands were tucked by the thumbs into his utility belt, and your eyes dragged lustfully back up his lean torso to his freckled, handsome face– well he would be handsomer if he wasn’t wearing the meanest fucking scowl. 

“Got a hot date?,” he asks with sarcasm dripping from his voice. “That why you’re driving so fucking fast? 60’s not enough for you?” 

“‘M so sorry officer,” you say, distracted by a light buzzing sound (was that his radio maybe?). “I, like, dropped my phone and stupidly tried to pick it up and my foot pressed down on the gas and, and…” 

His uniform makes you double take. It’s tight on him– you only need to look at the bulge of his crotch to see that– but it’s also the wrong color for this area. That shade of navy blue is reserved for Free City’s urban jurisdiction… but he pulled you over in the sticks, nothing but desert and meth dens and old highways like the one you’re on. He should be wearing khaki, he should be a state trooper or something, right? And what the fucking is that buzzing! 

“Hey,” the weird cop snapped, “I said. License. And registration, ma’am.” 

Shit, shit, shit. It’s not your car and you were driving twice the speed limit and you can get in trouble anyways. “Yeah! Grabbing it! My license… but I should tell you this is my boyfriend's car, that’s why I'm not on the registration.” 

The cop– his name tag says Keys– hums mockingly. He snatches your wallet from your hands and walks back to his patrol car (also weird looking, might be missing decoration on the door but it could just be your position in the sun) without waiting for you to fumble for the registration. Fuck, fuck– this wouldn’t be the first time a cop fucking robbed you, how much cash did you have in that thing this time?!

You check the rearview mirror and see nothing but the cop's head looking down in the driver's seat, possibly entering something into his laptop– fuck again. You’ve got a record– who the fuck doesn’t have a record in this fucking city– so there’s no way you’ll get away with just a warning. Even a speeding ticket was seemingly unlikely given Officer Keys shit attitude. You need to have the registration before he gets back or he’ll become insufferable. 

“Okay,” you take a deep breath to calm down and pull the glove box handle, only to have it fall open and dump paper, dime bags, and guns into the passenger seat and onto the floor. “Oh, motherfucker!” 

There’s a gun– there’s two guns laying on the floor of the car in plain sight and a pissy cop who will be back any minute looking for probable cause to arrest you. You rip your hand back like the guns were going to explode and your blood pressure only raises more when you realize there’s no way to dig anything resembling a registration out of that mess without getting your ass shot. 

Defeated, you cover your face with your hands. Maybe you could get out of the car and drop straight to your knees. It would piss the cop off as he didn’t tell you to get out and he’d obviously fucking shoot at you but maybe he’d just graze you for climbing out instead of unloading his whole fucking clip if he finds you staying– 

A shadow falls over your body, one you feel rather than see as you the boiling directness of the sunlight washes away. “UHm…” 

You hear the cop sigh and pull your car door open. “Step out of the vehicle slowly and with your hands out.” 

The curses flooding your brain overwhelm you. It’s fucking Valentine’s Day! You should be sipping champagne and getting your back blown out in a luxury sized bathtub, not harassed by a city cop in the desert and taking the fall for your loser boyfriend’s coke and unregistered weapons. 

“I said get out of the car!” The cop grabs you with his thick hands (hands that you had, for half a second, wanted on you before you remember he’s a damn cop) wrapped around your thighs to drag you out faster.

“Okay, okay! I’m sorry, stop!” Shaking, you hold your hands out in front of you and try your best to roll your body off of your back on the very edge of the seat. He was the one who commanded you to move slowly, but now he was impatient and this time his big hands capture your waist, making you flinch a second before you are ripped upwards into his chest, nearly hitting your head on the low rise of the car cabin door. “I didn’t know that was in there! Jesus Christ!” 

You never expected to feel hatred when a hot man’s body was pressed against your back, but today you’ll make an exception for this prick. High off his authority, officer Keys kicks the car door closed with so much force that a cool breeze kicks up among the dust. Then he slams you bodily into the hot car body and probably delights in the angry shriek that leaves you. 

“You fucking asshole!” All the fear that had been bubbling in you earlier turns to anger for a moment and you try to push off the hot car to free yourself unsuccessfully. 

The cop groans in response– probably the weirdest thing about this exchange, it almost sounds… sexual? “Keep talking, baby. Maybe the courts will give you a nickel and a dime to serve!” 

He forces your arms up and behind your head and starts patting his belt for his handcuffs. He grunts, and this time it sounds repressed, like he was trying to keep it down… that’s when you realize the bump in his tight pants is pressing hard into you… and vibrating. 

Your mouth falls open and dries up instantly in the dry desert air. “...are you wearing a cock ring?” 

“What?” You can still hear him fumbling for the handcuffs, his other hand so tight on your wrists that it hurts. “Shut up.” 

You push back with your hips and feel him counter you– and you would have believed it was just him being pissy about you not holding still, if it weren’t for the way his hips roll at the end. Effectively rubbing his very hard cock into your ass to get some friction. It’s embarrassing when it suddenly feels like the hot air around you is suddenly inside of you, spinning into a ball and writhing like fighting cobras in your gut. 

You desparately need a way out of this dilemma and you may have found it. “Fuck me…” 

The cop hummed, slapping a silver cuff on your wrist. “What did you say?” 

“I said–” you pull your arms until your elbows graze the painfully hot roof of the car. Because your motion was unexpected, the cop startles and freezes when he feels your head lay on his shoulder. You can peer past his sunglasses at his indignant, brown eyes. “Fuck. Me. I don’t want to go to jail for my trash boyfriend, and you don’t want to be suspended for sexual deviancy on the job, do you? Win–Win.” 

“Who said I wanted to fuck you, huh?” The cop, less angry and more amused now, tightens the other cuff to your wrist and braces his hand on your chest. “If you’re stupid enough to steal your boyfriend’s car full of illegal shit and get pulled over, who’s to say you're not stupid enough to give me a venereal disease, you little slut?” 

You pout. “... I didn’t steal his car and I don’t have a disease. And don’t fucking call me a slut!” 

But officer Keys just laughs at your indignance. “Open your mouth for me, cupcake.” 

You do what he says cautiously and are instantly gagged by his fingers. You can taste dust on his dry skin as well as something foul like oil. It’s entirely reactionary when your teeth close around the intrusion, and officer Keys grunts and draws them back but not fully out. Now that you know what to expect, it only takes a second to relax and allow him to press his fingers deeper into your mouth again, struggling to fight back your gag reflex and remember how to take it. He’s testing you but it doesn’t take long for you to ease into it, even sucking on them and swirling your tongue for him. 

“Atta girl,” the cop purrs, “yeah, yeah. Oh, I can work with this. You can deepthroat, right? You’re gonna need to be able to swallow the whole sword.” 

You nod your head and then find yourself suddenly unbalanced. The officer’s fingers pull free with a wet pop and he takes a massive step back from where he was crushing you against the car. You are stopped from falling by the very strong grip that takes hold at the back of your neck and he commands you to drop to your knees. Hot car, hot pavement, by the end of this, you’re going to have burns and bruises. You delicately squat instead of kneeling, wishing you had your knee pads or a jacket to throw down for protection but Keys is already unbuckling his belt. 

Your lip curls impatiently as you wait for him to finish pulling his dick out. A part of you wants to smack the sunglasses right off his face or pull his gun and shoot him, but you know it’ll do you no good in the long run. And as he uncovers his junk, the sound of vibrating gets louder. There's a wet patch on his underwear that you immediately forget about when he pulls the waistband down and his fat cock pops up. 

"Jesus Christ–"you gasp and try to protect your mouth, turning away from the sight before you but unable to tear away completely. 

It appears Keys is a meticulous groomer below the belt, too. The cock ring is glittery cyan blue, a ring around his balls and another around his cock making them both flushed red and veiny. You watch him twist the vibrating plate around his swollen flesh and use his other hand to pull back his foreskin. 

"Hey! Tick tock, cupcake," he says as he winds his hand in your hair and starts to pull you forward. "I'm on the clock and we're running out of daylight." 

Time to work for your freedom.  

Gathering saliva in your mouth, you wrap a hand around the base (fuck, your fingers don’t touch your thumb) and with your other hand still cuffed, you push the vibrating plate to his balls. Keys pulls his phone from his pocket and turns up the vibe via remote app, causing his hips to jerk and leave a wet smear of pre-cum under your nose. 

“Okay deep breath, baby.” The hand in your hair pushes you forward and despite the warning, you still gag when he slides right back and hits the back of your throat. “Uho, more.” 

He barely pulls back to let you suck in a new breath before he’s back at it, pushing you down on him despite your squirming resistance until your nose is buried in his short pubes. Your hands drop to his thighs and your nails leave red scratches on the pale white skin, tears gathering on your lashes until you are able to take one shaking breath through your nose. 

You should be mad, but the simpering whine he makes fills you with pride instead. It was impressive for you to take all that cock on one go. Your sex pulses with need and you don’t even notice your knees are on the hot pavement. 

“Swallow, baby, come on,” he praises as he looks down at you, his sunglasses moved off his sweaty nose to his head so he can better. 

Your jaw aches fiercely but you manage to obey and Keys’ moans at the feeling of your throat constricting his length. “Good girl, fuck.” 

Finally, Keys releases you and you’re able to gasp and cough and catch your breath while you stroke him to keep him happy. Your preferences for servicing him begin to shift as you feel your underwear slicken and stick to your outer lips. The last time you had good dick was probably that bank bathroom mid-heist (that janitor was packing just like this). This cop may be a complete asshole and a pervert, but damn it a huge dick was always going to do something for you! 

“Officer?” Keys looks down at you with slight disdain. He does admire the glistening drool on your chin and the wetness of your lashes, and he’s quickly distracted by your leaning back to squeeze your breast over your top. You’re going to ask him for something he fully intends to deny you until… 

“I’m so wet, please please…” you bite your lip unconsciously and make him watch you touch yourself to tell him about your soaked panties. “You can fuck me as hard as you want, don’t even need a condom, baby, please…” 

Officer Keys seemed to like the sound of that very, very much. He hauls you to your feet and walks you backwards twenty feet to his patrol cruiser. Still handcuffed, you can’t do much except obey and try not to trip over your own feet and fall. He keeps a tight hand on your arm as he swings open a door in the back before shoving you in halfway. You feel him yank your bottoms down your thighs and spit on your slick and puffy folds. 

“O-ho, baby,” he cooes almost mockingly and runs a calloused thumb over your clit, “how bad did you need to be fucked? You are one lucky girl that I pulled you over, aren’t you?” 

You try to answer him but he smacks your pussy and you shriek instead. 

“Just breathe, sweetheart,” he says, stroking his length still dripping with saliva, “nice and easy…” 

And then you feel the head of his cock pressed against your entrance and realize he is not going to stretch you out first even with that monster. On a long exhale, you force your body to relax but still you squeal a little as you feel him begin to fill your channel. For all his perverse snarling and coldness, he does exhibit some level of mercy as he doesn’t make you take too much all at once. It’s still a bit of a painful stretch but he moves slowly right up until he bottoms out inside you and growls loudly. 

“Goddamn!” You feel him grind against your hips and the cock ring vibe bumps your clit adding pleasure over the slight pain. “Haven’t fucked a pussy this tight since the Penris Bank robbery.” 

He starts moving in you, but your mind is somewhere else. Penris Bank has only ever been successfully robbed once in thirty years. You did that– I mean, you and your crew did that. Walked away with 20 mil each. Okay, your crew robbed the bank while you got your back blown out in the executive office bathroom suite. Hold the fucking phone– 

“Oh my god, you’re not a fucking cop!” In the blink of an eye, you realize how blind you’ve been. How could you forget that dick? Just because it was cosplaying as a police officer? So stupid. “Fucking asshole!” 

You try to struggle out of his grasp, but Janitor Keys adjusts his grip on your hips and lifts you up until your legs are kicking uselessly and he’s spear heading his cock into your g-spot. And as angry as you are, you can’t resist the coiling fire in your gut turning your arms to jelly or punching some high pitched moans out of you. 

“That’s it, kitten, purr!” Keys laughs and fucks you faster. “You missed this dick, huh baby?” 

You grumble and he smacks your ass so hard it stings. “I can’t hear you, bitch, did you miss this dick?!” 

“Yes,” you cry and drop your chin to your chest and throw your head back when he starts furiously circling your clit. “Yes, fuck! No one fucks me like you do–” 

“Fucking A’ right, baby…” 

Your feet find purchase on the car floor allowing you to brace against the heavy assault and push back, taking him even deeper. If a car packed full of people wolf whistling and shouting obscenities drove by, you hardly noticed, except for Keys' prideful wave as they disappeared. 

"Fuck, fuck," your stomach tightened painfully and tears gathered on your lashes. The bumping of the cock ring vibe slapping against your clit does you in and you collapse, gushing all over your partner's cock and soaking his pants. 

You feel lightheaded as you are gently laid out in the backseat of the faux cop car on your stomach with Keys cock still deep inside you. It only takes him three or four thrusts before he stills with a grunt and pumps you full of his cum. One of his hands rubs your back just like he had done when he finished on your stomach at the bank. 

Damn, you really had missed him. 

Catching your breath, you lift your head and turn a bit, then smack him across his face. Keys looks at you wide eyed, sunglasses gone and fake mustache peeling off his upper lip. 

"Ow…" He swallows and ducks his head to mumble, "okay, I guess I deserved that. Sorry."

You lay your head on your arms, feeling exhaustion wash over you as the role play ends. 

"...you know if you want, you can come over to my place and uh," Keys voice drifts off as he traces shapes on the soft skin between your shoulder blades. "I've got this huge bathtub in my penthouse thanks to the cut you gave me. We can, I dunno, throw some rose petals everywhere and drink champagne since it's Valentine's day." 

You lift your head again and give him a puzzled look. "Why would you do that?" 

Keys is a great actor because the way he blushes now is so sincere that you almost forget he was manhandling you not five minutes ago. 

"Because I like you, and you deserve it…?" 

Well, if your shit boyfriend wasn't going to spend Valentine's day with you… "fuck it, sure. But you need to clean this up and tell me what the fuck you are doing in a cop uniform!" 

Keys finally pulls his overstimulated cock out, leaving you empty and leaking but he massages your sore flesh to ease the slight pain. "Happy to tell you everything! We've got all night, if you want." 

And he leans over you one more time to plant a kiss on your temple before climbing back to eat his cum out of you. 

It looks like you are in for a great Valentine's day!

More Valentines! | Main Masterlist

So I was deadass going to scrap this entire fic several times, but I feel like I managed to work around the whole "fucking a cop" aspect. Drop a like if you liked this and leave a comment or anon ask if you wanna let me know what you liked about it!