#wait what's the ship name for nanny/brother francis?

[ineffable-rohese]

Gah this is so cute!!!

I’ve read the cutest fic ever by @toedenandbackagain and decided to draw a comic based on it! Please, read it:  https://archiveofourown.org/works/19840567

[warlockcrowleyfell]

Warlock didn't believe in Santa Claus or The Easter Bunny or The Tooth Fairy growing up. He didn't get the chance to believe. His gifts were always the latest and best, but never what he wrote in a list. Neither of his parents liked rabbits in the first place, nor celebrated Easter outside of allowing Warlock sweets and appearing in the public. When Warlock proudly presented his first lost tooth to his mother, she had been in a rather heated phone call with his father. Over Warlock's cheers of losing the tooth and yelling from her husband on the phone, Harriet Dowling had hurriedly urged Warlock off with the promise of putting a dollar under his pillow. She did not realize her words until after hanging up and having a stiff drink. The damage was done. She found Warlock in tears with his nanny and his tooth tossed in the trash. A time she regrets more than anything else in her life.

 No, Warlock didn’t believe in Santa or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy growing up. However, he did believe in other things. Stranger things. 

 He believed the old clock kept in one of the many halls of the estate was in fact a door. He didn’t say where the door went, but would announce when he would go in or come out.

 He believed there were no monsters in the closet or under the bed. No, everyone knew it was the in-between where they hid. Just like fairies and goblins. They could get you in door ways and window sills. 

 He believed the cook was from another planet. Not one nearby, but one to far to be discovered yet. He had come in on a space ship shaped like a snow globe, but had accidentally been left behind. So he’d taken a job and was waiting until his people came back for him.

 He believed his Nanny was in fact a demon with yellow eyes. Not an evil one. Rather, a demon who did not think of herself as nice. Even though she was.

 He believed Brother Francis was an angel. An angel who was bad at being an angel no less. Possibly because he actually liked the demon who was a nanny. Not that he’d admit that.

 His mother would tell him he was silly. Cook would laugh but praise his intuitiveness, playing it off as a joke. Brother Francis would choke on air and try to brush it off. Nanny would stare, dumbfounded, and her words wouldn’t work or come out right for a bit.

 Warlock got older. To the age other kids were beginning to not believe in Santa Claus or Easter Bunny or Tooth Fairy. But his funny ideas never stopped. He stopped completely believing them but would still think of the what ifs. 

 Years later, after an almost Armageddon that other people never new happened, a not-evil demon and a bad-at-being-one angel would be sitting in a bookshop. The demon, in fact named Crowley, would mention Warlock and how he was in fact not the Antichrist. So why then had Warlock known so many things he shouldn’t have?

[thegirlmadeofhoney]

The Girl Made of Honey

“I remembered that the real world was wide, and that a varied field of hopes and fears, of sensations and excitements, awaited those who had the courage to go forth into it’s expanse, to seek real knowledge of life amidst it’s perils.” chapter 10 Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte

        Chapter 1  The seaside years 

TW:  Mention of childbirth and Illness 

My early years were full of warmth, days in the flower garden with Mum, and my older brother Francis. The townsfolk would say the three of us were inseparable, as we would go just about everywhere with her. I was born on a rainy June day, the twenty-eighth to be exact in the late 19th century. My home was a decent-sized seaport town called Southampton, located on England’s south coast.

My mum came from Porto, Portugal, she lived there up until her fifteenth birthday, that's when her Papai sent her to a boarding school. A place called  Miss Tulloch’s an all-girls boarding school in Bushey, Hertfordshire for ages three through eighteen. She spent the next three years of her life learning to speak English and Greek, sewing, history, and how to sing. When she graduated she stayed three more years as a teacher for the younger girls. During a school trip to London, she met my father, at the time he was still an apprentice for his family's shipping industry.

 I think that's why our childhood seemed so bright in the beginning, they wanted us to see the world in a different shade. We learned how to tend to plants in the gardens, go for walks down to the boating docks to watch the waves ripple and backwash, Francis could sit there for hours sketching the view. When we weren’t doing that we played marbles with children on our lane or listened to Mum tell us stories about her home country while she baked sweets in the kitchen.

 Around the time when I was seven our father hired a Scottish lady to be our nanny, I always found her accent quite hard to understand compared to Mum’s comforting one. Now that I look back, that's when something started to slowly change in our household, maybe I was too young to comprehend. We started to see Father less around the house, we were told by the maids he was at work. I was confused, we lived close to his office and I was used to him doing his work in the study. Father would let me sit on his lap while he worked at the mahogany desk, teaching me how to do the finances. Truth be told they were just simple problems but I loved helping. Francis, on the other hand, didn’t seem hurt by this news but he was always good at hiding his true feelings, back then I thought it was a secret ability.

At the same time, our mum started to seem sick, of course, no one in the house wanted to admit it. The reason my brother and I found out was that we would wait at her bedroom door and listen

in when the doctor would come to visit her. Eventually, we were caught by one of the maids leaving and given a strict talk about minding our own business. 

It was a nice spring day when we learned the truth about Mum's illness. It was about noon when we came inside from playing marbles with the neighbours in our garden. Their nanny Maria called them inside for lunch, and we decided to grab a bite too. Upon entering the kitchen we saw the cooks making chilled cucumber soup and one of the younger maids rushing in looking all giddy while whispering something to the Chef de Cuisine. One of the cooks handed us sandwiches wrapped in cloth and set us out into the hallways. 

When we left the kitchen a knocking noise could be heard coming from the front door, my brother was the one to answer it. My father and the local doctor stepped into the house with a brief greeting that was cut off by a scream that echoed down the stairs from the second floor. Without a second thought the two men quickly head upstairs, Francis mutters something and we follow after them. Upstairs we find most of the maids huddled near our Parent's room whispering, the ones near the doorway move aside so the doctor and our father can go in. I give my brother a confused look, unsure of what is happening. Soon my thought was answered we were told mum was going into labour, but all I can remember is the screaming and the crying. By the time the twins were born the light coming in from the windows was almost gone and only a few maids were still mingling near the doorway.

 When we were allowed into the room Mum was fast asleep, her face still damp from crying. Two maids were holding the babies, our father had already left the room so the doctor was the one to tell us their names, Conan and Colin O'Connor.  

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank Tomie and Viv for giving me writing advice.

To all the individuals who read my early draft of this story.

I would also like to thank all the lovelies who roleplayed with my character Blanca O’Connor.

[the-cheesemonger13]

Good Omens as random crap my friends have said in no particular order:

Brian: I dang u to heck!

•••

(Everyone watching the last episode of Avatar the Last Airbender)

Adam (softly with a smile): Zutara.

The Them (shouts back in unison): Zutara!

•••

Adam to Newt: Would you like to join the coolio club?

Newt: I don’t need to join, I’ve got a girlfriend so i’m already cool

•••

The Dowlings handing Warlock to Crowley and Aziraphale: children are good for the soul, specifically my soul when i can hand them off to their uncles.

•••

Tracy, singing: Buttocks roasting on an open fire!

•••

((i don’t even ship them but this just fits 😂))

Uriel: (sigh) Gabe off fraternizing with Beez again.

(pulling out her phone): Well... you know what they say? Snitches get stitches but older sisters...

Michael, glancing at Ligur: Get Misters!!!

Uriel: ...no

•••

(at a live nativity around Christmas time)

Crowley: oh they got a smoke machine!

Aziraphale: NO! ThAtS Angelic Fog!

•••

Crowley points at Wensleydale: phone

Crowley points at Pepper: phone

Crowley points at Adam: laptop

Crowley points at Brian: phone

Crowley points at Dog: pistachio... good job

•••

Aziraphale: You’ve never been bowling! Bowling is a GENTLEMAN’S SPORT!!! It’s more a gentleman’s sport than (scoff) GOLF!

•••

Aziraphale: This is a really fancy dinner.

Crowley, literally unhinging his jaw to shovel green beans into his mouth: mmh hmm!

•••

Anathema: If you kill me, you’ll get caught because you’re not a perfect crimist.

Shadwell: Are you prepared to meet Jesus?

Anathema: Are YOU prepared to meet Satan!?

•••

Crowley : I’LL CUT YOUR ARMS OFF IF YOU CUT THE ARMS OFF OF MY PLANT!!!

*Warlock laughs like it’s a joke and goes back to his pizza*

Crowley: I’m still staring at you to tell you how serious I am

•••

Anathema: You know what! Just call me like...Bimbo or something.

Crowley: I’m absolutely changing your name on all your legal documents to Bimbo now.

•••

Tracy: Wait is that a pentagram on my wallet?

Shadwell: (almost spits his tea across the table)

Tracy: Oh never mind it’s just blood.

Shadwell: That’s Not Better!!!

•••

Warlock, under Brother Francis’ influence: You need to treat your stuffed animal like a real person.

Warlock, also under Nanny’s influence: (Immediately punches the plushie in the face)

•••

Crowley sleep talking at 1 am: “incoherent giggling and mumbling” “more mumbling and giggles” “something something... looks like Hastur!” “more deranged giggling” “Oink.”

•••

Aziraphale: The DiSrEsPeCt! in my BoOkShOp!!

•••

(Anathema cutting fresh loaf of bread)

Adam: (points to a crumb) I wish for a crispiness of the crust!

Newt: I give you a crispiness of the crust!

•••

(Hastur is wearing wool socks with flip flops)

Crowley: What on earth are you wearing!

Hastur: You’re wearing socks with crocs?

Crowley: Yeah but that’s actually fashionable now! What you’re wearing is an abomination in the eyes of God!

Hastur: So?

•••

Gabriel: Wait Aziraphale did you just say you like a demon!

Aziraphale: No no. i said demons look good in tight shirts... but in a very thirsty way...

[sueboohscorner]

#Reign - S4, Ep 15 - "Blood in the Water" Recap

#Reigniacs, it's almost over.  This wonderful story of Mary, Queen of Scots, Catherine de Medici and Queen Elizabeth comes to an end on Friday, June 16th. So many questions. Will Bash return? Will Mary die? WILL FRANCIS RETURN SOMEHOW?  

But we still have "Blood in the Water" to recap and so we begin in Scotland and the birth of an heir. Determined to the bloodshed at her hands, Mary is trying to find common ground with her husband.  She walks into Darnley's chambers and sees that he is visibly ill.  Mary notices a rash on his back and realizes that her husband has syphilis! This would explain his hallucinations and bizarre behavior. Mary is genuinely concerned and convinces her husband to go to hospital for treatment.  

Lord Bothwell is not happy that Mary is still giving Darnley a chance. Mary tells Bothwell that she values him as her trusted protector, that is all there will ever be between them. Darnley's mother, Lady Lennox, isn't happy about Mary sending her son away either.  Mary tries to reassure her mother-in-law that she only wants what's best for Darnley. He is sick and needed help. Instead, it's Mary who needs help. She goes into labor!  Mary cries out and Lady Lennox rushes to get help!  

Mary's labor is not going well.  Greer is by her side. The doctor is worried because the baby is not coming. Mary is losing too much blood and he fears for the life of Mary and the baby. When it looks like Mary is not going to survive, Lady Lennox slinks out of the room. Mary send for Bothwell. She tells the doctor that if it is a choice between she and her baby, save the baby! Mary says her goodbyes to Greer and Bothwell and slips into unconsciousness.  Bothwell and Greer try desperately to wake Mary and just when it looks like she is gone, Mary wakes!  She rallies and gives birth to a healthy baby boy!  A son and heir!  

Where did Lady Lennox go?  Not sure whether Mary will live or die, Lady Lennox sees this as the perfect opportunity to get Darnley back into power. She finds him in the hospital being treated for syphilis. When Darnley tells his mother that he's ill and seeing Kiera, she tells him its okay if it makes him happy. She convinces him to go back to the castle. Because Mary's fate is unknown, Lennox wants Darnley to staff the privy council with men of his own choosing. If Mary dies, he'll have no power. If they are going to do this, it has to be now! 

It seems that there is no maternity leave for a queen when Greer tells Mary that Darnley has returned to court.  She and Greer make their way to see what's up and they find Darnley along with his mother and the new privy council seated at the table.  Darnley informs Mary that he has asked the privy council to name is as steward of their child. When Mary threatens to tell everyone that her husband has syphilis, he says that he'll just say he got it from her!  Is there anything Mary can do to stop him?  

Mary, still weak from giving birth, makes a bold decision. She writes a heartfelt letter to her cousin, Elizabeth. In it she explains her situation in Scotland and asks that if anything happen to her she would take care of her son. That's not all...if Elizabeth never has children of her own, Mary asks her to raise her son as an heir to both England and Scotland. In return, Mary promises to end the rivalry between them and leave England alone. 

Unfortunately, while Mary is in her chambers, Darnley enters the nursery and convinces the nanny to leave the room so he can be alone with his son.  When Mary returns to the nursery with Greer, she finds the crib empty!  What has Darnley done with their son? 

In England, Elizabeth has not yet received Mary's letter but the English queen has troubles of her own. Still grieving the loss of Gideon, she is determined to find his killer.  She confides in her servant, Jane, that she believes it is her fiance, the Archduke, though she has no proof. Jane worries that Elizabeth suspects her but Liz reassures Jane that she knows the girl would never do anything to endanger the life of her family by turning on her queen.  As for the Archduke, Elizabeth will get revenge another way. There is a Portuguese ship full of gold heading to Austria. Elizabeth hires Sir Francis Drake to pillage the ship and bring the gold to her. But England's participation in this mission must be secret and Sir Drake says its no problem. He's an experienced pillager!  

It seems though, that Jane is not as loyal to Elizabeth as she would have her believe. Even when Jane is gifting her family with treasures from France.  We know that Narcisse is the one one who murdered Gideon but it turns out Jane is helping him!  I am ashamed to say that I didn't see that coming!  Poor Elizabeth...it seems that Gideon was the only person that was 100% on her side.  Narcisse is not done with Jane just yet. He wants Jane to convince Elizabeth that the Archduke must be killed to avenge Gideon.  When Jane refuses, Narcisse threatens her family.  

Sir Francis Drake returns to court with news about the Portuguese ship. He has completed the mission but there's been a bit of a mishap. On their return to England they happened upon a Spanish Armada.  Drake raises the English flag thinking that the Spanish will let them pass in peace. The plan fails and he fired upon and took down two of the Spanish ships. Elizabeth is furious!  King Philip of Spain has been looking for reason to attack England and because of what Drake has done, England has now provoked the most powerful army in Europe! 

Jane returns to court with Narcisse's orders and suggests that Elizabeth kill the Archduke. But what Jane doesn't know is that Sir Francis Drake reminded Liz that because she is queen, everyone will always want something from her and anyone who says otherwise is a lying. When Jane suggests murder out of loyalty to her queen, Elizabeth no longer trusts her motives. She's figured out that Jane was involved in Gideon's death but not that Narcisse was responsible (at least not yet). Jane is terrified when she opens the door to find her guards waiting to take Jane to the Tower.  

In France, evil Queen Leesa is back and is once again stirring up trouble for the Valois. She has arrived unannounced and with a wagon full of French heretics, including a witch. This time though Leesa tries to convince her mother that Spain is no longer going to fight Charles and Nicole's marriage. Catherine is suspicious, with good reason. Henri is confused by the change of plans but Leesa tells him privately to head to the Spanish warship that's been loitering since Henri's return to France. The entire Spanish Armada (yes THAT Spanish Armada) will follow and together they will force Charles to abdicate. 

But Henri has his own plan. He and Nicole meet and he tells her of Leesa's plan. Since he will soon be king instead of Charles, he convinces her to run away to the ship with him. They love each other. When Henri promises that Charles will not be hurt, she agrees. Henri tells her to bring his favorite corset. 

It doesn't take Charles long to notice that discover Nicole is gone and that Henri and Leesa have been conspiring against him.  Charles orders Leesa to be imprisoned next to the heretics and the witch. Leesa is dragged kicking and screaming to the dungeon. Catherine is loving this! She visits her daughter in the slammer and Leesa is as indignant as ever. That is, until Catherine tells her that the Spanish Armada isn't coming (they're busy with England).  Leesa begs her mother for help and Catherine agrees.  She will help Leesa in return for a laundry list of favors to France from the King and Queen of Spain.  I think we've seen the last of Queen Leesa! 

The Leesa problem may be solved but that still leaves Catherine with the matter of Nicole and her two sons. Charles believes that Henri has kidnapped his fiance and Nicole is being held against her will. Catherine knows that Henri and Nicole are lovers but does not tell Charles. Charles wants to attack Henri but Catherine fears the civil war that will break out over two brothers in love with the same girl.  Catherine's problem-solving skills are epic and this time it's no different.  She simply heads to the witch in the dungeon and hands her the book of dark magic. She asks the witch to take care of Nicole. 

Then there's Claude and Luc. I feel like this could have been a nice little love story if there had been more time. 

When Luc first approached Charles about an annulment for he and Claude, the King agreed. But now that he is going to marry a Protestant, Charles doesn't want to provoke the Vatican by asking for an annulment.  Luc won't be responsible for Claude's unhappiness and sends her to Leith.  Later, a tearful Claude tells Catherine that she went to Leith but that Leith is getting married!  Catherine tells Claude if Leith has moved on, she should too. Give Luc a chance, Claude! 

So this is it. All that's left is the series finale "All it Cost Her."  I wish we had one more season so that there was no rush to complete any of these story lines.  I started to cry when they showed the preview.  I am going to be devastated when the final credits roll.  

Stay tuned next weekend when I recap the final Reign episode.  It's been a pleasure!