#wait this aint tiktok

[whatcruelworldisthis]

rating how scared of things i am:

IM SO FUCKING SCARED OF THE DARK-

elevator: 2/10

cemetery: 1/10

snake: 3/10

clown: 3/10

spider: 2/10

darkness: 9/10

heights: 4/10

horror film: 2/10

bottom of the sea: 2/10

hospital: 3/10

insects: 4/10

toad: 0/10

needle: 2/10

plane: 2/10

blood: 0/10

cockroach: 3/10

[landfilloftrash]

someone. on tiktok. is making a youtube presentation. about how the original resident evil 4 merchant is obsessed with leon and im going. to eat a dresser. i need that on my desk by yesterday

[lennon666]

It’s so annoying when people on tiktok keep insisting that Hey Jude is for jules lol

[xxplastic-cubexx]

just saw a tiktok (probably it's not true tho) of someone saying that they didn't understood why the x-men stood with charles after knowing about erik, because, what charles, someone who never suffered or sacrificed anything, has to offer while erik went through a difficult life and has way more "package" to share in terms of survival

it's been two minutes and i'm 👁️👁️ at my phone-

rule number one we do not go on reddit for opinions rule number two we do not go on tiktok for opinions

[melsimps]

[Despite being flirted with separately, by three different people, at different times, the Moon Knight System gave the same responses:]

Flirter: so, just out of curiousity... what is your type?

Marc, arms folded: my wife.

Flirter: Yeah, I got that. What was your type before you got married?

Jake, scoffing: my girlfriend.

Flirter: Oh my god... that mask must be cooking your brain cells...

Flirter: Okay. Before your wife - and your girlfriend - what was your type? What was attractive to you?

Steven, smiling lovingly: my crush...

Marc: ...who then became my girlfriend...

Jake: ...who then became my wife.

[jrueships]

that's right babygirl. never upset daddy.

[oars]

rich people are fr so out of touch goddd like it would be fascinating if it werent so frustrating

[fics-lovebot]

enhypen fic recs

main masterlist

· · ♡ · · tysm to the amazing creative minds of the writers for giving me sevaral moments of joy reading your creations

i´ll be constantly updating this list so make sure to check it out often for new recs

pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️

divider creds: @kyejiz

LAST UPDATED: 19/11/2024

poly / ot7

their s/o falls asleep waiting for them - ( @heeliopheelia ) fluffFFYY

you take your engagement ring off during an argument - ( @heeliopheelia ) angst, love it

come back to me..please - ( @thinemoonshine ) text, angst, they want you back after they messed up but you´re over it. I read this when i want a lil angsty angst bc there´s a lot of begging and shi

leche of the sirens - ( @thinemoonshine ) dark romance, mature themes, revharem, obssesive and possesive behaviour, corrupt nobles!enha, siren!reader. GRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (insert that one pic of a werewolf ripping his shirt) THIS IS THE BEST THING I´VE READ IN A HOT MINUTEEEEEE!!!!! omg I literally DEVOURED this

you´re short - ( @nikrangdan ) fluff, crack, love itttttt

when you block them from your spam acc - ( @heeslomll ) text, fluff, crack, THIS IS SO FUCKFIJR FUNNY LMAO

"i wanna break up" prank hyung ver , maknes ver- ( @luvrseung ) text, crack, JAY IS MY KIND OF MANNNN, and riki LMAOOOO why is he like that.

makeup voiceovers - ( @kairoot ) fluff, crack, this is so creative omg, I love itttttttt

possessive - ( @kairoot ) text, fluff, crack, DKJSADKJHKASD so fun to read

dear husband - ( @atrirose ) fluff, you doing that one tiktoktrend where you call them husband outta nowhere, so cuteee

pretty boy - ( @atrirose ) fluff, tiktok trend where you call them "pretty boy"

exe.enhaboy_stopped_working.exe - ( @star-sim ) fluff, making them flustered. the Jay and Ni-ki ones are my favsss

is your girlfriend single? maknea line, hyung line - ( @star-sim ) fluff, crack, youtuber! non-idol bf! enhypen. when your youtuber bf finally shows you for the first time to his audience and the chat starts simping. PLSSSSSSSSSSSS READ IT, ITS SO GOOODDDD

"i want to break up" prank - ( @enha-stars ) text, crack. "wanna hear it in spanish? NOH" LDSJHFSJFDH WHY WOULD HE-

"we´d make a cute couple" - ( @sainns ) text, fluff, crack. NOT jay asking at what time u had a thought last night so he can be prepared lmao

“If you were walking past a strawberry field and you were very hungry, would you eat a strawberry?” - ( @luvrseung ) text, fluff, crack, heesung aint even know wtf he did lmao

hands - ( @cypherchii ) text, crack, enha legal line. "aint nobody looking at that", the sunghoon one .... no bc author is so real for that

another man paying for your nails - ( @joysbaereal ) text, fluff, crack, JAYYYYYY once again being the standard

a little less scandalous - ( @bywons ) fluff, suggestive, bad boy!enha

"i miss being single" prank hyung line - ( @joysbaereal ) text, fluff, very suggestive, sunghoon needs to chill out LMAO.

for their doll - ( @dioll ) fluff, enha hyung line. items the´d have in their car just for you, soooo cuteeeeee :(((((

i´ll be your bf - ( @chaconnenha ) fluff, angst, jealousy & possessiveness, minor suggestive, "you're not his girlfriend, and he's not your boyfriend, but.." I LIKE THIS

the other man?? - ( @thinemoonshine ) text, jealousy, crack, they are NOT about to let their girlfriend be in the same vicinity or presence of another man—especially, not one-on-one.

brought the heat back - ( @neos127 ) toxic!enha, highschool au, the sunghoon one was sexy ngl LFJSDFKJSH

sending them dirty texts while being surrounded by family - ( @heejake-hoon ) hyung line, VVERY suggestive. SDLFKJLDKJFH STOPPP I HAD TO PUT MY PHONE ASIDE WITH THE JAY AND SUNGHOON ONES,,"Be careful what you wish for, baby girl… you know damn well this dick doesn’t play fair." HAD ME TEARING UPPP

charmed by her - ( @xoamiiren ) noona!reader, younger bf!enha, BC WHY DID HEESUGN AND JAY HAD ME GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET

give you the world (when you pout) - ( @okwonyo ) fluff, e.r NAURRR, NOT JAY CALLING HER "MY HEART" i lit threw my phone across my room, and sunghoon omg :(((( so fluffy

experienced vs inexperienced - ( @p4ranormaluv ) "which enha member wants someone inexperienced and which want someone experienced?" i 100% agree with this take and gawddd i have a thing for swtich!jake

blinded by your lethal face card - ( @blairbliss ) fluff, KSHKDFJHSKH stoooop this had me blushing n shii

heesung

ex-bf! heesung texts - ( @fakeuwus ) crack, fluff, he´s SIMPIIINNGG

down bad - ( @boyfhee ) texts, crack, loser!hee, ITS SO FUNNY BC HE´S WEIRF AF UNPROVOKED SDFJS

hopeless - ( @star-sim ) FLUFF, emo!heesung, horrendously down bad! heeseung, cute sweet!reader. absolutely no one would have expected the dark, brooding, and rough heeseung lee to be hopelessly head over heels in love with the sweet, oblivious you. AAAAA THIS IS SO CUTEEEEEE

who r u? - ( @jlheon ) fluff, you and heesung are in situationship but none of the members knew your knew, so they make up all these plans to lowkey figure it out. this was soooo entertaining lmao, i loved it

jay

random texts with bf!jay - ( @enha-stars )

too sweet - ( @star-sim ) fluff, suggestive, badboy!jake, nerdy!reader, downbad!jake. Jay is scared he will hurt you in the future so he tries to break things off but at the end of the day he´s whipped LMAOOO, I LOVE ITTTTTT

say it back! - ( @star-sim ) FLUFF, non-idol! bf! jay, clingy cute!reader, whipped!jake, like fr, UGHHHHHHHH SO CUTE AND DOMESTIC

pics i posted on my ig story for my crush to see - ( @lattegyu ) ig stories, fluff, crack, smau, non idol!jay

pictures of bf!jay enha send you - ( @ddksoo ) text, fluff

justice and mercy - ( @thoughtsofmetaphor ) god!jay park x virgin!reader, NAHHHH the potential rev harem this had is insaneee, i love it

please be real - (@ja3yun ) ex!jay x fem!reader, OMG???? THIS IS THE BEST FUCKING ANGST I´VE READ IN A MINUTEEEEE, bREAK UP ANGST????? SING ME TF IN, plsssssss i was bAWLING my eyes out at 5AM!!

eat the rich - ( @enhypencores )chaebol!jay x fem!reader, wheeeewww, i love this sfdlsdjfljkshd he´s so manly and possessive

jake

fuck buddy jake - ( @heeseungsbm ) smut, lowkey fluff bc he´s got a fat crush

texts with ex-bf!jake - ( @bywons ) fluff, CRACK, he´s down bad fr

pictures of bf!jake enha send you - ( @ddksoo ) text, fluff

pics i posted on my ig story for my crush to see - ( @lattegyu ) ig stories, fluff, crack, smau, non idol!jake

brought the heat back - ( @jayniks ) smut, idol!jake, giving him a bj while he´s on weverse live sdlkjlsd WHEWW

hello kitty meets batman - ( @star-sim ) fluff, angst, lowkey smut, dark horror creator youtuber!jake, downbad!jake, beauty vlogger youtuber!reader. fans had no idea their fav youtubers were in a long-term secret relationship. THIS IS SO GOOOOOODDDDDDDD plsss, i wish i could read it again for the first time

things we never said - ( @hoonigiris ) very angsty. it’s heeseung’s wedding, jake’s had too much to drink, and really, he just misses you. perhaps what happens after are the things he should never say. This is realllyy well written, i loved it

clingy bf jake - ( @onyourmarkks ) PLSSS i want him so bad :((((((( he´s so bf

taste of heaven - ( @moonstruck-muses ) vamp au, smut, fluff, angst, vamp!jake, human!reader. he´s keeping his true nature a secret. THIS HAS IT ALLLLL and the smut is so gewd too, pls i would love the see another part of this

grwm to break up with my bf prank - ( @jaeyunwon ) fluff, LSDJFLSKJ JAKE WAS HEATED, so cute

sunghoon

texting bf!sunghoon - ( @heeslomll ) text, fluff, crack, HE´S SO UNHINGED LMAO

texting bf!sunghoon - ( @heeslomll )text, THEY ARE HORNY AFFFFFF

texts with ex-bf!sunghoon - ( @saursoob ) text, crack

sunghoon as your downbad bf - ( @jaeyunwrld ) text, crack, fluff

random ass texts - ( ( @saursoob ) fluff, crack, downbad!hoon

freaky bf!hoon texts - fluff, crack, very suggestive, downbad!hoon, mentions of pee kink,,,IKYFL

pictures of bf!sunghoon enha sends you - ( @enha-stars ) text, fluff

emergency contact - ( @hoonatic ) ANGSTYYYYYYYYY, fluff, exes to lovers. weeks after your breakup, sunghoon finds out that he’s still your emergency contact. i love it SO fucking MUCH plssss

the pussy eating competition - ( @karinasbaby ) smut, HELLO???? THIS WHOLE CONCEPT IS CRAAZZZYYYYYYYYY, bc WDYM there´s a competition of how many times a guy can make a girl squirt under 5 minutes??????? IM- it´s good yall

crush - ( @star-sim ) fluff, crack, non-idol! bf! sunghoon, sleepy!hoon, dumb!hoon. AAAAAAAAA i love it :( so domestic and fun and cute and :((((((

without words - ( @slytherinshua ) fluff, PLEASEE I NEED HIMMMMMMM :(((((((((( they´re so in love

sunoo

espresso - ( @star-sim ) dark academia au, downbad!sunoo, loser!sunoo nerd!sunoo, popular!reader, lots of sexual frustration. I LOVE ITTTTTTTTTT SMMM

please come back - ( @alvojake ) angst, fem!reader, car accident, death themes, this is perfect for one of those days you want to feel pAIN

jungwon

july jewels and music notes - ( @atrirose ) text, fluff, crack simp!jungwon. LOVE THIS, it makes me cackle

too much, baby? - ( @onlygarden ) smut, dom!jungwon, noona!reader, lowkey size kink, dacryphilia, overstimulation. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA WHAT IS THISSSSFHDFHSKDJ

xo (only if you say yes ) - ( @rinanextdoor ) fluff, popular!jungwoon, secret admirer!reader, PLSSSS i need to read the next parts, it´s so good. I can only IMAGINE to fluff

act a fool - ( @thoughtsofmetaphor ) street racer!won x member's little sister!reader. nahhhh this needs a whole kdrama, reader is so cool

not for sale - ( @thoughtsofmetaphor ) droid!yang jungwon, parts shop owner!reader, THIS IS CRAZZZZYYYYYYY, the way he switched up one reader after she was done fixing him i-

ni-ki

disclaimer: he may be 18+ but I don´t feel comfortable reading any smut about him, so there won´t be any listed in here

sweater - ( @star-sim )fluff, angst, hurt-comfort, non idol bf!riki, happy ending, he gets insecure bc he doesnt recgonaize the sweater you´re wearing,

boys night - ( @star-sim )fluff, crack, non idol!riki, where his six friends tries to help him text his school crush. I LOVE THISSS, such a fun read

random texts with bf!riki - ( @sainns ) fluff, CRACK, "if u were my ex i wouldnt get over u, i would start tweaking like austin mcbroom" LMAOOOO he´s so real for tar

pics i posted on my ig story for my crush to see - ( @lattegyu ) ig stories, fluff, crack, smau, non idol!riki

gamer!bf riki - ( @alvojake ) FLUFF, IM GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET RN SDKFSLHSJDFH this was so CUTE

necklace - ( @rikiislvr ) fluff, idol!riki, i WISH this would happen to me but i´m too broke to be frequenting the same stores as him alsjfha, need a part two asap plss

[captainreecejames]

The "You Can Call Her Phone" Series (Lewis Version)

inspired by the tiktok edit by britcedez, "you can call her phone but she aint gon answer... you can call her phone and I'll probably answer." this is the first of the series featuring different drivers.

warnings: man who can't take a hint, maybe a little bit of possessiveness

pairing: lewis hamilton x fem!reader

wc: 477

You're in the bathroom doing some skincare routine when your cell starts ringing. "Babe, can you answer that?"

Lewis grabs your phone from the charger, seeing the name Paul on the screen with a green puke-face emoji. He smirks as he answers it. 

"Hi Paul," he answers loudly, waiting for you to make a face from the bathroom. You stick your head around the door, eyes wide in what Lewis decides is a mix of disgust and bewilderment. It's 9:30 at night on a Tuesday, there is no reason he should be calling you. 

"Oh, Lewis." Paul is surprised on the other end, clearly not thinking that you'd be with your boyfriend right now. "Didn't think you'd be with our YN tonight?"

Holding back a scoff, Lewis decides that he wants to have a little fun. "Our?" He clarifies, raising an eyebrow at you. You shrug, moving back in front of the mirror. “Last time I checked she was my girlfriend.” There’s a pause on the other end and Lewis is a little surprised Paul hasn’t put up more of a fight.

“Well um… Can I talk to Y/N?” Paul is trying to sound assertive, but through the phone it comes across as whiny.

“She’s busy right now, can I give her a message?” Lord knows he wouldn’t actually relay any message the guy wanted to give you, but that wasn’t so important right now. 

“I was just concerned about how she was doing, so no need really.”

“Concerned about her well being? Are you trying to be her boyfriend?” Lewis’s voice is teasing, but it’s enough for Paul to know that he can’t play any games.

“I’m like her work boyfriend,” Paul answers and that just makes you wince.

“Oh, I don’t know about that. To be her work boyfriend she’d have to actually want to talk to you.”

At that you gasp, hoping that Paul can’t hear you from the other line. “Lewis,” you scold in a whisper, but he’s just smirking over at you.

“Well,” Paul huffs, which just makes Lewis’ smirk grow wider. “Then I guess I’ll leave you to it.”

“Thanks for trying to check in mate,” Lewis gets in before Paul can hang up, laughing loudly as the screen turns black.

“I can’t believe you said that,” you tell him when he joins you in the bathroom.

“You told me to answer your phone.” He wraps his arms around your waist from behind, putting his head on your shoulder.

“Yeah, but I didn’t think that you’d say that to Paul. It was so mean!” The smile on your face tells him that you don’t mean it. Paul was quite annoying and couldn’t seem to take a hint, hopefully talking to Lewis got it through his thick skull that you really didn’t want to spend anymore time with him.

[diorsluv]

feather , part 22

“ with you out my life ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by lhughes_06, _quinnhughes, edwards.73, and 81,177 others

yourusername she’s officially a single pringle nowww ‼️ if u see me on tinder no u dont 🫢🫢

view all comments

jackhughes i love pringles

→ yourusername pringles don’t love you back

→ trevorzegras jack’s been a single pringle longer than you have yourusername

→ lhughes_06 oh 😒

luca.fantilli is that why you popped up when i searched up the girl of my dreams

→ yourusername good thing it’s called a dream for a reason 🥰

→ luca.fantilli i knew i shouldn’t have turned to tiktok for pickup lines

→ lhughes_06 oh 🫤

username20 why is luca flirting with mini drizzy this aint right

mackie.samo swipe right when you see me

→ yourusername why are you all doing this

→ rutgermcgroarty not if she sees me first

→ adamfantilli jokes on you she swiped right on me already

→ lhughes_06 oh 😓

trevorzegras not for long 😘😘

→ yourusername get the hell away from me i’m barely legal

→ trevorzegras you are not “barely legal” 🙄 AND ALSO stop making me look like the bad guy

→ yourusername you are the bad guy

→ trevorzegras i’m fighting the urge to strangle you

→ yourusername i don’t my brother would really appreciate you saying that 😒

→ lhughes_06 oh 🤬

edwards.73 your hands look pretty

→ yourusername hand kink????

→ edwards.73 WAIT NO FUCK

→ markestapa eddy this is not what we discussed

→ luca.fantilli bro you did it wrong

→ edwards.73 i’m sorry 😕

→ lhughes_06 oh 😨

username12 why the hell does luke keep going “oh”

→ username3 and why the hell is everyone tryna make a move on my girl 😟😟

colecaufield my friend’s younger brother was asking about you

→ yourusername jokes on you i know you don’t have any friends

→ jackhughes is this about who i think it’s about

→ colecaufield no one of our friends’ brothers actually asked me about her.. jackhughes

→ lhughes_06 oh 😞

markestapa damn how’d you manage to crop me out of that first pic

→ mackie.samo the implications are wild

→ dylanduke25 wow u were in her bed 😱

→ yourusername yes dylan he was in my bed WAITING FOR ME TO PAINT HIS NAILS

→ markestapa HELL NO i was just watching you do yours 🙄🙄

→ lhughes_06 oh 😧

username99 luke keeps oh-ing i’m slightly scared for him!

username45 SHE’S FINALLY FREE

→ username24 escaped booking.com’s basement

→ username27 BOOKING.COM???? 😭😭😭

username71 are they all commenting this shit on purpose lmfaoooo

username36 if their goal is to make luke mad i’m sure they’re succeeding

→ username2 fr i can hear him sobbing from here

jamie.drysdale

liked by _alexturcotte, mackie.samo, rutgermcgroarty, and 64,312 others

jamie.drysdale reminder to never break up with someone over text

tagged: yourusername

view all comments

_quinnhughes she’s gonna kill you LMAO

→ jamie.drysdale oh please she can’t even push me

→ trevorzegras jamie last time she quite literally almost knocked your head on the corner of the counter

yourusername first of all JAMIE I CANT BELIEVE YOU

yourusername THIS IS SO FUCKING FOUL

yourusername LIKE THATS AN OUTDATED PIC YOU CAN’T USE IT

yourusername I’M NEVER FUCKING VISITING YOU AGAIN

yourusername and it wasn’t text it was warzone because he blocked me on everything else 🙄

→ jamie.drysdale one, that’s embarrassing, and two, STOP SPAMMING MY COMMENTS

→ yourusername ok mr proper grammar

→ jamie.drysdale your so annoying

→ yourusername okay i take it back your grammar is ass

adamfantilli aw was she crying

→ jamie.drysdale yeah we got a noise complaint from our neighbors

→ yourusername i can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic or not 😕😕

→ adamfantilli aw were u crying ☹️😔😖😣😩😪

→ yourusername aw did i accidentally block you ☹️😔😖😣😩😪

colecaufield don’t tell me she was actually crying over blaker

→ jamie.drysdale she was!

→ yourusername she was not!

username27 first pic is me knowing dryshughes is never gonna happen

→ username89 IT WILL HAPPEN

→ username37 DONT PUSH UR NEGATIVE THOUGHTS ONTO US

→ username14 ur praying for our downfall arent u

username54 honestly tho she’s a mood

username28 i cant believe jamie actually posted this

jackhughes i just realized you have her saved as “fucking menace 🥰”

→ jamie.drysdale i hate her

→ yourusername don’t u think that’s a little mean jimmy johns????

→ jamie.drysdale god here you go AGAIN with the nicknames 🙄

→ yourusername YOU LAUGHED AT MY NICKNAME FOR JACK WTF DO U MEAN

→ jackhughes HUH WHAT NICKNAME????

→ yourusername don’t worry about it jacky boy

edwards.73 i could’ve sworn i heard a witch screeching but ig it was her crying

→ mackie.samo it’s okay man we all heard it

→ jamie.drysdale can confirm that’s what it sounded like

→ yourusername can confirm i’m being harassed by my friends and brother

→ dylanduke25 we were never your friends yourusername

→ yourusername oh 😥

yourusername i forgot to say i’m not heartbroken

yourusername so STOP MAKING ME LOOK LIKE I’M SAD

→ jamie.drysdale i thought i told you to stop spamming my comments

→ yourusername i’m not even spamming ur such a baby 😒

→ jamie.drysdale RESPECT ME IM OLDER

→ yourusername whatever

next chapter notes ) like i said in my other post i’ve been so tied up in school it’s been hard to get these chapters out WITH GOOD QUALITY nonetheless i hope it was still enjoyable albeit late 😭 also i forgot to mention but u mightve noticed the song lyric at the beginning of the chapter is NOT in order (yes it annoys me) but i didnt wanna repeat lyrics so that’s just how i’m gonna put them in for the rest of the song: if the lyric has been repeated then i’ll skip it til i get to the next new one 🙏🙏

tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes @v1olentdelights @dancerbailey3 @random-human02 @ho3forfakeguys

[betterthanburrow]

Quarterback’s Secret Girlfriend - Instagram AU

(Bengals Quarterback! Joe Burrow x Secret Girlfriend! OC)

liked by yourbrother and 50 more users

yourinstagram: it’s truly a hot girl summer.

view all 13 comments

joeyb_9: are those my sunglasses?

↳ yourinstagram: umm… no

↳ joeyb_9: i think those are my sunglasses… i had been looking for them all day.

↳ yourinstagram: i’m your girlfriend… so what’s yours is mine and you can’t argue with that.

↳ joeyb_9: i didn’t agree to those rules.

↳ yourinstagram: yes you did sign up for those rules when you asked me to be your girlfriend!

liked by yourinstagram and 69,513 more users

Bengals_Updates: Media Day Preview (IG STORY)

view all 5,009 comments

username1: THATS MY QUARTERBACK!

username2: oh lord… he’s so fine 🤤🫨

username3: the headband look is a dangerous look to our society

username4: i don’t know how i’ll act when the media say photos are posted… i might change as a person

username5: i’m not gay, but if i was… i would get on my knees for him.

username6: maybe the girls on tiktok are right… Joe Burrow is a fine white man!

username7: BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

username8: god, the men you have put on this earth to work are writing horny comments about Joe Burrow.

liked by yourinstagram and 580,300 more users

Bengals: If the internet breaks, this is why.

view all 30,420 comments

username1: my girlfriend is on instagram… delete this!

username2: MVP SEASON INCOMING 🔥

username3: hard to look at ❌ hard while looking at ✅

username4: 😍😍😍

username5: i swear i’m straight… i swear.

username6: the way that everyone dick rides Joe Burrow is crazy 😵‍💫

yourinstagram story updates

viewed by joeyb_9 and 69 more users

liked by 90,513 users

NFL_Gossip: this tweet is going viral on twitter 😂

view all 15,009 comments

username1: i just know she’s fighting for her life every time the Bengals sm admins posts about Joe.

↳ username2: i just pray that she doesn’t have tiktok…

username3: honestly like… look at the horny comments on the Bengals’ posts about Joe 🫠

yourbrother: lol @.yourinstagram

↳ yourinstagram: 😵‍💫💀

liked by 20,513 users

BurrowBengals: i got a notification that Joe Burrow posted on his instagram story but when i clicked on the notification, this screen appeared… did anyone see what Joe had posted on his story and then deleted?!

view all 15,001 comments

NFL_Gossip: CHECK OUT OUR INSTAGRAM PAGE! WE WILL BE POSTING THE DELETED INSTAGRAM STORY IN FIVE MINUTES ‼️

liked by 169,013 users

NFL_Gossip: We know that the Cincinnati Bengals Quarterback is very private about his life outside of football… So it’s no surprise that he very quickly deleted an instagram story that involved his rumored girlfriend (@.yourinstagram)

view all 55,420 comments

username1: JOE BURROW HAS A GIRLFRIEND… THIS IS THE WORSE DAY OF MY LIFE 😫💔

username2: wait… she’s so pretty, she’s so lucky!

username3: i thought Joe was a cat person?

username4: just went to check out her account but her account is private 🫠 i can’t imagine how many follow requests that she has gotten in the past few hours 😵‍💫

username5: i don’t care about Joe having a girlfriend… i do care about how i’m not on his close friends list 🤬

yourinstagram story updates

viewed by joeyb_9 and 99 more users

liked by yourinstagram and 375,850 more users

joeyb_9: Dark Knight

view all 20,390 comments

lahjay10_: (TOP 2) DAM SURE AINT 2! 🐐

username1: a hot photo of you won’t make us forget that IG story that you accidentally posted 🤥

username2: THATS MY QB!

bengals.central: the Dark Knight of Cincinnati 🫡

username3: i’ve never wanted to be a football so bad!

username4: your girlfriend is a lucky woman…

yourinstagram: i don’t think i could write any more clever comment than all of the horny comments…

Author’s Note:

if you have a Instagram AU request, please send the IG AU request to my Inbox and i’ll try to get the requested Instagram AU published as fast as i can!

thank you all for the love and support! 🤍

[divinelolita]

GOOD MORNINGGGG(istg if you dont reply to those tiktoks imma-)

ANYWAY i woke up and had an idea for u cuz im so smart and imma give it to you

so lemme get theeee mcflurry and a big mac(full band headcannons) with a bf who just be maddddd clingy and they love it like all the time but thing is if someone does it a lot then they bound to need space and they thought if they told reader to stop he finna be sad

BUT sooner or mf they yell(not yell yell) for reader to stop for just a god damn minute and readers just like "ok🤷🏾" AND WALKS AWAY AND DOESNT HUG OR KISS THEM FOR THE REST OF THE WEEK(hell even two)💀💀💀💀like they will sit next to bro and he doesn't even lean on them😭🤚🏾

like he aint mad or nothin he just took it really literally😭

add anything you want like duhhh

BAND X CLINGY READER

teehee hii😈 you send me like 10 tiktoks in under a minute bro

BILL:

・He genuinely does love when your clingy

・Bro is clingy asf himself oml-

・Yet everybody needs alone time to themselves, and eventually he would just feel the need to be alone

・He really didn't want to hurt your feelings, he knew this was your way of showing your love, but he would eventually get overwhelmed.

・At first he'd try giving you small hints, like when he would say he wanted to go out for a walk. Yet everytime you wanted to come along and he didn't have the willpower to ask to go alone.

・He puts up with it for a little longer before he reaches a breaking point.

"M/N! Please just leave me alone for a second holy fuck-"

"Oh, okay."

・He'd feel relieved you weren't mad at him

・Yet after a day- hell maybe even a few hours- he's craving that touch again.

・Like sitting next to you on the couch just waiting for you to hold his hand or cuddle him VKYXWUHWVEE

・You took u alot of his time so now that you didn't hang out with him as much he felt surprisingly lonley.

TOM:

・Less patient than Bill.

・Babe he loves your touch, kissing you and holding you and snuggling you and-

・He won't admit it but he's actually quite clingy too.

・He really loves his alone time though, especially if its spent playing his guitar. He just likes to be alone to relax his mind

・Gives you a few subtle warnings, telling you he "has to clear his mind" and "needs to relax"

・Yet you would still cling to his shoulders like a koala. He loved you soso much and didn't want to hurt your feelings but he felt almost suffocated.

・Telling you he's going somewhere only for you to say "Ah, where are you going? Can I come too?"

"Can I go anywhere without you following me?!"

・lol ok

・You shrugged and walked away from him, he wanted to tell out your name and call you back but he also wanted time to himself

・Feels anxious when you don't hug or kiss him like you used to, he's afraid you'll break up with him or something.

GEORG:

・He'd get overwhemles pretty quickly

・No no, don't get him wrong, he absolutely loves hugging you. But sometimes he would rather hangout and talk instead of snuggling for hours.

・So if you ask to go out with him somewhere he doesn't care at all at first, actually encouraging you to come along with him.

・But, like Tom, he loves to be alone.

・It's just comforting for him to be in a quiet area with nobody else.

・Bro gives no warnings, just flat out says "Can you not touch me right now..?"

"My bad."

・He's happy you understand him and don't just yell at him. He's happy you respect his boundaries

・He finds himself missing your touch, how you would kiss him all over his cheeks and lips or how you would play with his hair when yo would cuddle.

・HE THINKS YOUR MAD AT HIMMMMMMMM

・He's kinda scared to ask you to start giving him attention again

・You seem fine so...shouldnt he feel fine too?

(he doesn't)

GUSTAV:

・KJHBECJJLEFCBLUIEHRCLKUWEBDCLJHWEDCMKWEDCBMJDCMJWEDBM

・He absolutely loves your affection, doesn't care if he's doing something he will stop and hold you if that's what you want.

・He just feels so safe and happy in your armssss

・Sometimes he just needs a little break, like maybe a few hours or a day to himself.

・He always feels bad about this though, he loves you more than anything and doesn't wanna push you away.

・He'd give so many hints because he doesn't wanna hurt your feelings omfg

・Eventually just tells you flat out, even though his heart is pounding.

"I just need to be alone, M/N!" "That's fine."

・He doesn't know whether to be confused or relieved, he's a mix of both.

・He misses your affection so bad wtf...

・Just wants to pick you up and cuddle while watching a movie, but he's waiting for you to make a move but you want to respect him and-

・its very confusing.

[blvckentropy]

WARNING LONG RANT!

Okay so I've been sitting on Drake so called "diss track" and I still declare it as the biggest CONTRADICTING ASS track ever. Like I get die hard Drake fans gone be like he won regardless but he hasn't because he made several deep holes in his argument. Granted you probably don't give a damn and that's fine. Overall, neither do I but some of you got so blinded and hyped by his one-liners and his flow that you ain't peep what he really said did you? Ngl, had me sitting here like a was crazy for a minute. Now correct me if I'm wrong cause I also had to fact check myself, but these are the lines that got me like now wait wait....

You said, "The ones that you're gettin' your stories from, they all clowns" just to say "We plotted for a week and then we fed you the information".... which one is it? Are you calling yourself a clown or the ppl you sent the info. to? I'm perplexed.

"What about the bones we dug up in that excavation? And why isn't Whitney denyin' all of the allegations? Why is she following Dave Free and not Mr. Morale? You haven't seen the kids in six months, the distance is wild Dave leaving heart emojis underneath pics of the child"

First and for most, what is your obsession with this woman? Also are we in high school? Why we worried about someone follow count and/or who following who? She a grown ass woman like she can't have male friends. Plus, if irl she with Kendrick every day, why does she need to? And if Kendrick aint worried about, why are you? You caught up in finding out if that's her real bd but where are your evidence? If Kendrick has to, you do too. Childish.

BUT THIS IS WHERE IT GOT DISRESPECTFUL!

"This Epstein angle was the shit I expected TikTok videos you collected and dissected Instead of being on some diss-direct shit You rather fucking grab your pen and misdirect shit My mom came over today and I was like, "Mother, I—, mother, I—, mother—" Ah, wait a second, that's that one record where you say you got molested"

"This about to get so depressin' This is trauma from your own confessions This when your father leave you home alone with no protection, so neglected That's why these pedophile raps and shit you so obsessed with, it's so excessive"

"Touch My Body" by Mariah Carey play, you probably start reflectin"

This whole verse was a misinterpretation of Kendrick's song "Mother I Sober" which I had to educate myself with. Long story short, the song is about his mom SA and how she thought he was by his cousin even when he told her "no" and it forms a bigger picture to his overall family trauma as a whole and so on. So not only did you Mr. " You gotta learn to fact check things and be less impatient" if that ain't the biggest pot calling the kettle black idk what is. You got it wrong (Kendrick pretty much explained it) then double down on borderline prob over the line atp disrespecting his mother and all and every victim of SA? We victim shaming now?

I never been with no one underage, but now I understand why this the angle that you really mess with Just for clarity, I feel disgusted, I'm too respected If I was fucking young girls, I promise I'd have been arrested I'm way too famous for this shit you just suggested

*Slow claps* Congratulations you played yourself. What in the fuckery? CURRENTLY....DIDDY DOODLE BOB HAS ALLEGATIONS RIGHT NOW AND HE'S MORE FAMOUS THAN U. And don't get me started on the list....umm...you literally just named one (If you still bumping R. Kelly, you could thank the Savior)

"Only fuckin' with Whitneys, not Millie Bobby Browns, I'd never look twice at no teenager" but you'll look once? Also, someone que up the video with him on stage w/ a 17-year-old. He and I quote "Why you look like that?" "You thick. look at all this" Then kiss her all over her face🤔 Sir a kiss on the cheek or forehead would suffice but I digress.

And correct me if I'm wrong, I believe the only reason Kendrick hasn't even the touch the "beating allegations" is because he covers all that in both Mr. Morale and Mother I sober? If I'm correct, then you basically didn't tell us nothing that hasn't been said on him. Plus you also not fact checking. Where's of your proof? I would think someone with the upper hand would have laid down evidence that you mastermind...oh wait...was Kendrick right along? Now you look like the goofy on defense. Like do Kendrick even have to say anything?

Bruh, but the funniest part on it all. You acting like YOU DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS. YOU DROP A DISS first wanting him to response and now you trying to make it seem like you didn't? My guy, if your actions alone here isn't a manipulation master class. Chileeeeee

[lizaluvsthis]

so how we feeling about that new smg4 short?

AINT NO WAY... NO FKING WAY MY GUY-

HE WAS WAVING- THE FACT THEY COULD JUST PUT OTHER CHARACTERS BUT INSTEAD THEY CHOSE THREE- THIS IS GETTING BETTER OMG...

Like dude- YOU'RE LITERALLY STARING AT THE TWO PEOPLE WHO'VE BEEN RIVALS AND WELL- FRIENDS. C O U G H

WHOEVER SAID IN TIKTOK THAT THE THEORY ABOUT SMG34 IS GONNA BECOME POSSIBLY CANON- YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT. HOLYSH-

LIKE I SAID GUYS THEY'RE GAY. VERY. VERY. HOMO.

-

Four is the one whos waving at three WHO caught mario's attention thinking four was waving at him. BIUT INSTEAD. HE WAS WAVING AT THREE. OUR MAN. OUR "USED-TO-BE-ENEMY" BUT WHAT I SAW???? Three didnt even shook off or ignored for INFACT HE DOES THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE THAT HE'D DO.

He. Three. AS IN OUR GUY THREE. WAVES BACK AT HIM SMILING. EURGHAVDHWBF (I'm very ill)

LIKE EVEN AFTER THAT- Three waits for four before HE could even walk with him. (What a gentleman three I'm just- WOW-)

These gays are pretty excited. (Too excited-) to see each other.

(LUKE ISTG-)

[damiianismwayne]

jason: welcome to mcdonalds what may i get for you

tim: YURRRRRRR

jason: oh my gosh...

jason: 12.78

tim: wait what happened.

jason: 12.78

tim: i aint even order yet big bro

jason: TWELVE SEVENTY EIGHT. PULL TO THE WINDOW

tim: wha uh- well le- let me get a- a double western bacon chee-

jason: YES YES YES THE DOUBLE WESTERN BACON CHEESE BURGER WITH EXTRA BARBECUE SAUCE WITH 3 TENDERS 2 RANCH 2 BARBECUE SAUCES WHY IS YOU PLAYING TIMOTHY WAYNE DRAKE

tim: well damn why baba how u know its me ??

jason: YOU THE ONLY PERSON COMIN' IN MY DRIVE THRU SAYING YURRRRRR AT TWO FIFTY FIVE PM AND I CAN SMELL THAT CHEAP ASS ROSS COLOGNE

tim: ey ey u good baba u need a raise but yeah lemme get that uhhhh

tim:

tim: and a chocolate shake

tim: yeah lemme get a chocolate shake

tim: u know what a chocolate shake is since u know everythin' ?

tim: yeah let me-

jason: TIMOTHY IF YOU DONT BRING YOUR MF ASS TO THE WINDOW AND STOP PLAYING WITH ME I JUST CLOCKED IN AND YOU LACTOSE INTOLERANT YOU DONT DRINK NO MILK

stephanie: whats your secret talent?

damian: i can build a 600 piece lego set in under 3 minutes

dick: i can kick myself in the forehead

tim: this is the coolest sh*t ever i guarantee not a lot of yall can do this i can eat an apple in 3 bites like swear to god yall give me an apple right now ill devour it in 3 bites

[from the other side fanfic]

damian: thats yo man?!

jonathan:

al ghul: thats my mans!

damian: should i exit rn?

al ghul: wait but why u gotta exit-? why cant u make this like a 3 way thing?

damian: WOOOOOOOOW I DO NOT PARTAKE IN SUCH ACTIVITES AT ALL

jason as robin: haha I CAN FINALLY LEAVE!! HEAVEN IM COMING TO SEE YOU

jason:

jason as red hood: IM BACK IN THE FUCKING GOTHAM CITY AGAIN??? OH. MY. GOD.

tim: british people be like-

jason: its chewsday innit?

tim: british ppl seeing spiderman be like-

jason: peetah pahkah???

tim: british people be like-

jason: can i get a baao o wa her?

tim: british people get mad and be like-

jason: ARE YOU FAHKING SCHREWPID

tim: british people getting stabbed be like-

jason: hey there mate. bit rude to put that knife in me chest innit

dick: bombastic blank criminal offensive blank

duke: OH NO DICK DID YOU GET A TIKTOK SAYING ?!!!

duke: ANSWER IT CAREFULLY CUZ IF U DONT...U DIE

dick: bombastic uhhhhhh

duke: DICK LOOK IM GIVIN U A HINT

dick:

dick: OHHHHH

dick: bombastic eyebrow ! criminal offensive eyebrow!

duke: DICK NOOOOOO

[fapper]

full story of what happened in office hours 2 days ago and how i accidentally rizzed up the TA who is also my crush

*note: FAAM stands for "fine ass asian man" who is like, an acquaintance of mine idk

okay mind you this happened only 2 days ago bruh. okay buckle up cuz i cant stop thinking abt it 😭 so me and FAAM went to this review session for our midterm that was wednessday (i got a 75% btw) anddd i only went bc my crush who is also the TA was going to be teaching. soooo i came into the room and mans was sitting in the front so he didnt notice me, but later on he got to the blackboard and started yk teaching shit, and i made sure i was consistently looking at him to see if he'll look at me anddd i think he did like 3 times. not that many tbh anyways after review session we had office hours in a differrent room, so me and FAAM immediately head to office hours, and they have this annoying queueing system and there were A LOTTT of ppl in offce hrs that night, the room was full and there were only 4 TA's, and i only had my eyes on one guy HAHAHA ok so i mind u office hrs was from 6 - 8pm. i couldnt get help from him and i was waiting and waiting and waiting and me and FAAM kept talking abt him while he was in the room omfg 😭 FAAM was like 'wait so its him?' and he proceeded to point to the wrong TA and i was like, bruh FUCK no ITS NOT HIM DUMBASS like i think our behavior was hella obvious in hindsight bc we were literally talking abt him in front of himmmm bro 😭 FAAM was like 'you should go talk to him' BRO STFU YOU KNOW IM NOT! and i was likeeee 'what do u think of 'eagle' for my nickname for him?' (cuz he had a really big hairdo and it reminded me of wings ok) and FAAM was laughing and we were just kikiing like 2 old bithces bruh.

okay so it was 7:50pm. and at this point i was waiting for my turn to get help so i was literally on TIKTOK bored as shittt 😭. and i feel my crush stand up from his seat and slowly walk to stand behind me... and i was thinking 'aint no way' and then he says 'y/n?' (OKAY FIRST OF ALL HOW DO U REMEMBER MY NAME) and i was surprised at first so i jumped a little and he said 'sorry! 😭' and FAAM immediately says 'do you need a seat?' to the TA cuz we were sitting together and the TA goes 'noo its fine hahaha' but i told FAAM to be a wingman so he was insisting on it and so FAAM moves to the next chair and my crush sits next to me to help me. ight so boom

so immediately i start asking him questions and he was explaining hit to me and i couldnt focus fr. FAAM and i kept making glances at each other and every time we looked at each other we smiled real hard meanwhile the TA probably noticed all that shit HELPPPP I JUST KNOW MY CRUSH NOTICED ALL THE EXCHANGED SMILES ME AND FAAM HAD LIKE U COULD JUST TELL WHAT WAS GOING ON OKKKK!!! at one point when FAAM and i made eye contact and smiled i literally stoppped typing whatever he said and lost my train of thought bc i was trying not to laugh sooo hard bruh. meanwhile the TA is witnessing all this shit happen in front of him rn bruh (the TA was sittin between us 😭) so i notice my crush was starting to struggle in answering the question/ explaining shit so he started looking into the distance to think, and every time he got quiet i would look at his face and just look at him reallll good lmfaoooo omfg i kept looking back at his face while sitting next to him bruh. and one time when i looked at him, he smiled and closed his eyes and looked down like DAMN ARE YOU FR HAVING THIS REACTION TO ME LOOKING AT U RN? OMGGG so immediately i was like. ight he wants me. andddd lo and behold. my crush gives up and puts his laptop on our table and says "okay so im just gonna show you the solution dont tell anyone haha" *nervous laugh* meanwhile everyone in the class heard him and they look at our direction 😭 so me and FAAM laugh at this and when i looked back at the TA his face was literally PINK broooo.... im not fucking kidding he was blushign or something. and so as i was taking a pic i jokingly said "bro is about to get fired" and he was like no its fine and laughed it off. also hes just generally a nice guy like i had CHATGPT open in one tab and i said 'ohhh sorry not me having chatgpt open rn' and i closed the tab and the TA noticed and laughed and i said 'women in stem' and he laughed and said 'no yeah exactly' (i made the same joke the last time in office hours with him, he said 'i believe you' when i hinted that the hw answer i had was NOT INDEED MINE LOL) so i guess u could say i have that joker rizz the way he supports me and laughs at my jokes bruh. anyways after that i was like. 'thank you! *makes thumbs up gesture with both my hands* and he stands up and says something bla bla and i say thank you again and he makes the same thumbs up gesture with both his hands and turns around to help the next person.

bruh moment

do yall think he wants me? it was definitely not his normal or usual behavior, *this is random but his voice is so nice* and i feel like i made it really obvious that i liked him by joking with FAAM.