#wade answers����️

[mossycakes]

i think the absolute funniest part of The Honda Odyssey Scene is they stayed in the car the entire time when they really didnt need to. they both got thrown out of the car MULTIPLE TIMES and yet they always went back in?????

[kendyroy]

they should release the scene where wade undresses logan

please let’s have a full discussion on this…

where do you all think wade ripped off those clothes to get to logan’s jammies? where’d he get the gloves? does logan remember any of this? how many layers was logan wearing?

[eupheme]

Your best friend Wade who always jokingly flirts with you the way he flirts with everyone - and you hate it because you have a real genuine crush on him and the flirting doesn’t mean anything… does it? It has to take a mutual friend to be like “oh my god he’s in love with you and doesn’t know how to tell you, so that’s why he’s always joking about boners” (please and thank u ilu 😌)

omg avo this kicked my ass, the amount of pining for Wade as he (jokingly, you think) flirts with you would be off the charts 🥲💖 I wrote a little drabble with how that might go, I love you and your ideas - thanks so much for sending this to me!!!

— cause every time we touch (i get this feeling)

best friend!wade wilson x mutant!reader

<1k | flirting, dirty jokes, heaps of pining

Blow job. Leg Spreader. Slippery Nipple. Liquid Viagra. Sex on the Pool Table. Pink Silk Panties.

Each time Wade comes into Sister Margaret’s - which is four or five times a week - he asks for dirtier and more obscure drinks.

"Wishful thinking", he tells you, each time.

Even with the roll of your eyes, you have to admit that it keeps you on your toes. That you look forward to seeing your best friend so often - tamping down the jolt in your belly, night after night.

Reminding yourself that yes, he got you this job, but he's not here to see you.

That this always was his spot.

It had been an easy sell. Used to working overnight shifts - security, back then. After the disaster with Weasel, they had been desperate for a replacement. Wade had come to you immediately, dropping to his knees as you opened the door.

Winning you over with a "you could literally get paid to hang out with me. How is this not a win-win-win? How is this not your dream job?"

And here, you didn't have to hide what or who you were. Reading feelings and intent were a bonus, when a handshake could tell you everything you needed to know. Their feelings spilled as easily as they were written, when you were negotiating contracts.

It also helped in-house. A human lie detector. Able to break up fights, settle arguments. A party trick, when things got slow. The regulars trying to get things past you - tales based in truth spun tall, seeing when you'd catch them.

Wade never plays, but you think that's because you know him so well.

And what seems like a sell, quickly evolves into more. Warping, as days pass. Spending more time with a crush sounds tempting, on paper.

The reality is something else.

Yes, there is a seat saved for him at the bar. Literally saved - his name scrawled across the vinyl, and you still haven't been able to scrub it out. Stopping by at all hours to chit chat.

Teasing you - how he's "so glad he doesn't have to stalk you at your old job anymore". An over-the-top sigh about being relieved that you're safe now - in your new job, surrounded by mercs.

Begging for the best job. Puppy-dog eyes. Fake coupons for favors that would make a sinner blush. Crossing his heart that you could have anything, and he means anything you wanted, if he could only get "that thing involving the murder clowns".

It's enough to make you hope.

Later, at home - in the early hours as you're pulled under. Replaying his comments. The filthy jokes and the shameless flirting - wondering if that's all they were.

Wondering if he'd be waiting for you tomorrow, perched on his stool.

But there's the downfall.

You see him - but you also see him with everyone else.

The charming smiles. Head thrown back in a laugh as he works the room. A friend to all, and as you watch him - perched on the knee of a goddess of mercenary as he yaps away, you can't help the swift current of jealousy.

Of foolishness.

It's enough that you're almost regretting agreeing.

Your mood is sullen, as you wipe down glasses. Trying to ignore the ache when you see him flirt. That realization that the something special you thought he had with you, might just be a part of his personality.

And when Dopinder shuffles from the back with more ice for the chiller behind the bar, it only takes one look at you before he's sighing.

"Not again. Please, I am begging you. I cannot take more of your yearning.”

Your lips quirk. Hadn't realized you'd become that obvious. He'd become your go-to, in the long hours you spend together behind the bar. Pinkie-promising not to say a word - but you always thought you'd had a decent handle on your expressions.

"We don't have to talk about it." Your hands raise, placating, "Just let me yearn in peace. I'll get over it."

"You know that almost half of what DP makes a month is funneled back in here, right?" He gives you a long look, "Before you, I saw him once a week. I had to beg him to come get his paycheck."

Doubt still lingers.

"Doesn't mean anything," You shrug - eyes dropping, as you help him restock.

"You do not think Mr. Pool worships the ground you walk on?"

The intensity of his question has you side-eying him, "I mean... I don't think he sees me that way. He acts the same with me as he does with everyone."

“Sure.” He huffs, leaning against the bartop, just as Wade plunks down in the seat in front of you.

“God, I haven’t been over here in like-,” Wade checks a fake watch, “Fifteen minutes? Feels like longer. Felt like a fucking hour.”

Pivoting back and forth on the stool as he adds, “Is it possible for people to get separation anxiety? Or is that just dogs? Is this how Dogpool feels when I’m gone?”

You just manage to catch the last bit, as Dopinder slips away.

“Exactly the same.”

Tonight, Wade is the first person that sits down in front of you for the game.

A frown, as you peel off your gloves - your barrier, to the outside world.

His own already bare - sliding back-and-forth over his suit-clad thighs. You'd mistake it for nerves, if you weren't so sure Wade had never been nervous in his life.

"What's your story, Wilson?" You ask, "Hope you brought something good."

"Oh, it's a whopper. A real fucking doozy. Apparently, you're not gonna believe it. " His laugh is a little too loud, and your eyes narrow, "But let's give it a whirl, okay?"

There's a flicker, behind the bar. A sideways look towards the bar, where Dopinder's hands cover his face. You don't need to touch him to read the guilt written across his features - the way he almost flinches, under your glare.

You're going to fucking kill him.

The sound of your name brings you back.

“Ready to play?”

Wade's hands rest face-up on the table - an offering. For once in his life he almost looks serious, and it’s enough to bring you back.

A breath - before you align your own. Letting them drop down, skin mapping against skin for the first time.

It floods through you.

The lick of heat that almost feels like a caress. A deep yearn that causes your own heart to twinge, layering with the feeling of need. Desire. Want.

It's familiar. It mirrors something deep inside, something that’s become as much a part of you as flesh and bone.

Oh.

A laugh slips from you, breaking the beat of silence. Relief tinged with disbelief - your smile stretching wide.

“Yeah?” You breathe, softening.

“Yeah.” He laughs, “Thought I was being obvious. But you are pound-cake dense, apparently.”

Hands flipping over, to entwine between yours. Letting that feeling inside him linger, settling warm and comforting over your bare skin.

“But I like that about you.” Another huff of a laugh, “Like all of you, really. Always have.”

It makes your heart ache. In a way that finally feels full, feels right - instead of the near-agony you’ve been bearing for weeks.

Only you could be such an idiot.

thanks for reading! 💖

[mischievous-thunder]

Kitty just wants his milk

[brainrotcharacters]

wacky behavior from Logan who did uppies with Wade in the Void as he's asking where the hell were they without knowing if Wade could survive a direct stab first

[novakiart]

it's not exactly your prompt but that's only because wade & peter start hooking up Long before spider-man and deadpool do

🕷️ written by me & nevi

[niyana-the-ambiguous-mobian]

Enjoy this mini compilation of Maddie trying not to lose her mind in The Knuckles show for about 3 minutes.

[spyderschaos]

Seriously, who leaves a chicken leg in the freezer after taking one bite out of it 😓

[humuhgod]

wade: snork mimimimi

logan: :)

[gossippool]

i love how no one knows how old wade is and how the writers don't seem to know or care either. like look at his cake. he's 1

[palamadeez]

[drac0line1nn1t]

*Wade staring at himself in the mirror*

Wade: I'm so pretty.. *obviously doesn't believe it and is trying to convince himself*

*Wade frowns and reaches for his mask*

*Logan walks up behind him and gently grabs the arm reaching for his mask and Wade jumps around three feet in the air*

Wade: Marvel jesus peanut warn a gu-

*Logan reaches around his head with his other hand and puts his hand over Wade's mouth*

*Logan leans his head on Wade's shoulder looking in the mirror too*

Logan: *smiles* You're so pretty, bub.

[eupheme]

Lazy morning bj with Wade x Reader x Logan drabble request?

ooooh yes, thank you so much anon! I’ve loved thinking about this!! 💖

logan howlett x f!reader x wade wilson

550 words | soft morning, double oral sex & swallowing

You always liked the way it felt when both sets of their eyes were on you.

The heavy weight of it. Reverent, in the way it drags across your skin. Something reserved only for you.

It’s early - limbs still sleepy from a late night together. The sun just starting to streak in, golden where it stretches across the bed.

A careful shift, as you settle against spread thighs - straddling where they press together. Fingers already curled into the sheets, and you’ve only just begun.

Letting spit pool on your tongue. Letting it drip down onto Logan’s cock. Your hand wrapping into a fist, as your lips close around Wade’s. The sounds they make layer together - hissed groans and soft gasps.

Taking him deep, as you’ve learned to. The tight swallow of your throat, before you lift - letting your tongue sweep across velvet-soft skin.

Switching, a moment later. A slow back-and-forth, the bob of your head in tandem with the grip of your fist. Skin left spit-slick, as chests heave - breath growing short.

If you could fit them both in your mouth at the same time, you would. Content to let Wade run his, the rasp of his early-morning voice combined with the low sighs pulled from Logan.

How their hips start to tilt towards each other, leaving you less space to have to move. Fingers reaching to cup your head, angle your face.

The murmuring becomes more insistent. A low “feels so fucking good, goddamn HYLA GST Swarovski Edition got nothing on you, baby” - that ends on a choked moan.

Silencing the Mouth with the sweet suck of your own. His fingers twining with yours as your eyes flick up to watch.

Looking for the sharp pull of his brow. The bunching of his muscles in his belly, strung tight until he snaps with a loud moan.

Your victory floods your tongue.

Logan finishes after. Edging himself with a spit-slick fist. Brow furrowed as he watches you swallow - your tongue peeking out after, a little wink sent their way.

A rough sound when you move, nuzzling against his hip. The pace of his hand stuttering, when your tongue drags across his sack.

Coming against your lips with a groan, the second they close around him.

Won’t admit that he likes the anticipation. How messy you are, when he’s spilling second in your pussy, wet and tight and warm.

Knowing that you’ll taste like both of them, when he kisses you.

Warmth pools low in your belly, at the sounds he makes. The soft moan only the two of you get to hear. Drawn out and almost desperate, as he drives himself just a little deeper into your mouth.

Chasing the warmth, as you suck. The salt that seeps across your tongue - swallowing again. Fingers still wrapped around his base - holding his cock steady, as your tongue laps at the slit.

Getting every drop.

You like taking care of your boys.

It’s only fair, after all, with how thoroughly they ruined you the night between. That subtle twinge still lingering between slick thighs.

The way they soften now - boneless. Heaving chests and leaden limbs as you grin, pleased.

It’s only a brief reprieve, this snapshot in time. Because if you know one thing for sure…

It’s that your morning is only just beginning.

thanks so much for sending this in!! 💖

[logictoinsanity]

for the record the correct answer is they switch all the time but Logan bottoms more

[crimsonbubble]

Just hear me out. Deadpool has guns and he definitely knows how to use them in bed and I'm not talking about just holding it to your head iykwim

cw. nsfw, gn!reader, gun play, vague fear kink (?), thigh riding *not proofread, just pure horny

[you made me remember that one video I saw on twitter a while ago 😭😭]

MINORS DNI!!

no bc this isn't the first time I thought of this scenario-

to keep it short and sweet; he'd fuck you with his gun

the mf wouldn't even tell you if it was loaded or not (they never are), he thrives with how much you trust him

and loves to point out how much you're loving it which only makes your hole clench tighter around the barrel of the gun

"you're liking this a little too much, don'tcha think?" just to push the barrel in further and burn the image of you writhing against your bed in his mind

but he's also enjoying this, very much

it's evident in the way he grinds his hips into your thigh

[novakiart]

you guys the problem is he won't let HIMSELF rest