#vows the nth installment

[i-did-not-mean-to]

Vows - Addendum - Part I

Dear @eunoia4mind, I have written this one specific scene, but I've left this one rather open...

Please, if anyone reads this, reblog and tell me what you think reader should do!

Vows : Part I ¦ Part 2 ¦ Part 3

Words: 850

Warnings: Sadness

As beautiful as the words exchanged in a moment of relief and unspoken emotion had been, reality turned out to be much harder than you had expected.

Every time your husband left your chambers to deal with the things that were – undeniably and inevitably – part of his duties as the king’s son, you couldn’t help your heart from sinking into your toes.

Moreover, you couldn’t prevent the helpless, unvoluntary surge of distrust and resentment within your heart; he had sworn that he cared for you, but you could barely notice any real difference other than the frequent smiles he gave you now.

Maybe, your relationship had not been as bad as you had originally thought it to be as there was so little change in your husband’s behaviour; he still did all the things he had done for you before, only now, he did them with a smile.

He would sit with you, walk beside you, listen to you speak about the people you’d met and the actions you had taken during your days; he would smile when hearing you talk with impatience and fondness of his father and his antics, and he would breathe coy kisses into your hair as soon as you fell silent again.

Also, he had started to share the accounts of his days in the sun with you, eager to describe the colour of the leaves and the smell of the earth; you loved truly loved listening to him, but it still felt like looking through a window upon a life in which you had no place.

Most nights, he even came to your shared rooms, but you knew that he barely slept in the confined, foreign space; it was a show of his good faith and honest effort, so why did it make you so sad?

“My love,” Legolas called you back to the earthly realm when you stared out of the window during dinner instead of replying to his well-meant questions about nothing in particular.

This was not working, you thought desperately while a wave of numbing panic paralysed your limbs; you had sworn so many things and yet, you still felt like Legolas and you were but puppets thrown about on strings that were invisible to you.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, forcing yourself to meet his soft gaze.

“You seem distracted,” he whispered – sadness weaving like a silver thread through the fine silken tapestry of his voice – and you felt awful for making him feel as neglected and unloved as you once had.

“I love you!”

The words were so simple, so pure, so naked sitting on the white tablecloth like birds having fallen out of their nest; there were waves of emotions making his eyes ripple like the surface of a lake after one had dropped a stone into it, and you were fascinated by the myriad colours that shimmered in his gaze.

And yet, you could not answer him; all the words you had buried within yourself for long years had fossilised into a hard lump that weighed heavily on your heart without ever shifting.

“Do you hear me?” Legolas asked, “I love you. Why don’t you answer me?”

Your lips parted but the toneless sigh of grief unspoken sounded nothing like actual words and it held the fragrance of the dust that had settled on your soul.

“Speak to me,” Legolas begged, discarding his napkin, and coming around the table to take your hands into his, “tell me what I can do to make this right. Is it too late? Are you teaching me – oh love of loves – what time means?”

All his life – an endless desert of starlight and sunbeams – he had naïvely believed that time was a ghost that only ever haunted other races; to feel it running through his fingers now was akin to trying to find a single drop of water in an ocean or a specific leaf in a forest.

If only he had known what he stood to lose when he walked – careless and confident – in the shadows of the trees and along the endless sea; if he had been aware then, he might have caught and treasured this one moment when he had lost your respect, your confidence, and your heart.

Had he trampled your love underfoot and now it would never blossom again?

“I…” you started, but words would still not come to you.

Silently, you got up and stared at the stars in the sky that were so much like your husband – beautiful and unreachable – and your heart grew heavy with a sorrow as old as time.

“I love you,” he repeated, desperately, violently, tempestuously now and still, you couldn’t bear to face him.

“I do!” His hand – warm and solid – came to rest upon your shoulder, the tension in his fingers conveying all the want he could not wrap into words and the silence singing of domains and dreams forever lost.

Not enough, you thought with a hint of bitterness that poisoned the well of your affection, and much too late.

So, if you think that reader should leave and give up, let me know :D

And if you think that they should try to make it work with their husband, just drop a few hearts 💕

@eunoia4mind I hope you liked this and I did your vision justice :)