#vile series

[itscontinental]

VILE: WET again, appologies, no scannner, no more. A clear transcription of text can be found at the bottom, beneath the the paragraph of exhausting excuse and exposition below; If it is not apparent already: we are quite embarrassed with all the VILE. This is the only piece of the VILE series that was ever subject to change. As progenitor to the series, our rule of ceaseless movement was merely applied on a whim to the first iteration of "WET" and we did not follow it with intentional adherence. So the two subsequent versions pictured here are technically the first official additions to the "VILE" series as they were the first to be produced without a moments pause whatsoever. This being said, these were only an exercise at the time, we did not know that we would experience a continuous compulsion to pump these pieces of shit out one after another. We still find it funny to reference them as a series considering they are some of the worst things we have ever written, but there are so many, and in sharing them with you, we are forced to read them ourselves for once and thus access all the introspective bullshit that people claim can be gleaned within strict, unwavering, stream-of-consciousness writing. As we were getting wet, getting violent and vile, the "series" was yet to exist we don't like its existence. It just is as we are just yours Even our most vile parts especially the VILE:

For visual clarity, we will transcribe the text below. We will fill in gaps of missing letters and correct some spelling errors severe enough to make a word unclear. other than this, no edits will be made.

VILE: WET (Small/duplication) everything about this city is wet, the arid summer made up in sweat; it is deafening:dumb I cannot hear over the water fountains and sweat and the ponds that they made there full of viscous liquid making me sick making me violent and vile. and when i dream i am hanged and exsanguinated (THIRD) and being left and turning and being salting and turning to jerky and as i awake i am wet, releasing wet into wet and bathing in all that wet lest the wet become putrid, walking in my soggy shoes and glistening in oil-- polished as a doorknob: Confessions of a Shoe-in; I am so fucking wet. VILE: WET (extension)

remaining there you there with him in his robes sink into the eb and flow of the sink and this city is soaked everything in the city wet, the arid summer made up in sweat; it is deafening--dumb: i cannot hear over the water fountains and the fountains making mechanincal and the ponds they installed there full of viscous liquid making sick making me violent and vile and when i sleep i dream of insanguination, being hanged and insanguinated, being left and turning, salted and turning to jerky and i awake and am sweating through the bedsheets and it stings and i hope its sweat because it stings and itches and expires sooner so sooner than jerky would by many although i do not know if it spoils when the meat is wet, my meat is wet in the middle and the out place, perspiring from the outplace and the outside where the wet falls and reminds you that the clouds are mist and that you cannot grasp or walk on or touch or grasp like lumps of of cotton but rather would soak you and will and does upon my forehead from out and out and inside burning wet and boiling like the sacrament like i once beleived in jesus christ and ive been soaking and sick and baptised and so sick, sad i think maybe but soaking all the time since he told me we no longer have anything in common but i can keep the water the sacrament whatever id like, my share, and it is wet and i am wet releasing wet into the steam heat of this vast and vile machine and bathing in all the piping and wet lest the sweat become rancid, putrid in the city wet and walking in my soggy shoes and glistening in oil, polished as a doorknob: confessions of a shoe-in showing signs and everyone cold and soaking and and cold and mostly showing regret shewn portraits damaged in the moisture of my storage in the attic where it rises and settled to douse my portrait and anoint it anointed forever in the eyes you no longer have anything to talk about nor in common save the rain, the sun&sweat and see you and see you and coughing black that only may be blood and beginning to forget. Other "VILE" pages linked below: IN LOVE

DRY

DARK

BRIGHT There are more many more somewhere in THE STACK we will post them as they present themselves although, they are not entirely In tact

[larrylimericks]

12Jun24

A soul made of plastic and hollowed, In missed exploitation, Si wallowed: If he owned 1D’s name He’d cash in on their fame ... It’s a no from our Lou, who unfollowed.

[tealin]

@afterthegreatunknown, it's your lucky day ...

[ven10]

Something about the Baudelaires+the tragedies they face being associated with fire (the fire that destroyed their home, the fire at the Caligari Carnival, the fire at the hotel Denouement…) vs the Quagmires+their tragedies being associated with water (Duncan+Isadora being kidnapped+stashed inside a statue of a fish then later inside of a fountain, the Baudelaires finding Quigley in the Hinterlands surrounded by ice, Quigley+Violet having a key moment on a frozen waterfall, Quigley+the Baudelaires escaping via said waterfall, Quigley being seperated from the Baudelaires by the Stricken Stream, Quigley sending a telegram to Violet whilst she is in a submarine fully submerged in water, the Baudelaires almost reuniting with Quigley after travelling in the depths of the sea in ‘The Grim Grotto’, in ‘The Penultimate Peril’ when it’s revealed that Duncan+Isadora are in danger of drowning as eagles attack their self-sustaining hot air mobile home which is flying over the sea and,of course, all three Quagmire triplets becoming lost (in the sea) to the great unknown.

This is especially evident in ‘The Vile Village’ when the Baudelaires have just rescued the Quagmires who at that point were “two dripping figures” bc of the “rushing water” of the fountain they were trapped in which is then contrasted, merely one paragraph later, by the man who causes the majority of the Baudelaires troubles brandishing fire, “Detective Dupin, holding a torch and heading straight toward the Baudelaire orphans.” [evidence taken from pages 210+211 of ‘The Vile Village’.]

This could represent a number of things:

1: The Quagmires trying to help the Baudelaires like how water extinguishes fire.

2: The cold way in which Olaf uses the Quagmires solely for their fortune and his own sadistic purpose as opposed to his hunting down of the Baudelaires being fuelled by burning revenge.

It’s also interesting how Duncan+Isadora are associated with water whereas Quigley is initially associated with ice in TSS until he+the Baudelaires begin to rely on each other and then he is associated with water (the ice of the stricken stream cracking and Quigley being carried away with it). Due to this, there is solid reasoning to view water in asoue as a metaphor for friendship (at least in the case of the Quagmires).

[yourfavaschips]

have you done arthur morgan

Arthur Morgan from Red Dead Redemption 2 would be Lay's Wavy Hickory BBQ Potato Chips!

[magicaldreamfox1]

MAKING MY OLD GIFSET IDEAS — 8/25

vegas + giving pete what he needs

[trash-gremlin]

could you imagine how good spirit animals would be if it wasn't written as a children's series

[professorllayton]

trc really is a cycle bc once u read it once u never stop rereading it

[sage-nebula]

Thinking about how they decided to bring back the whole "one Gerudo male born every 100 years to be king" bit in TotK for whatever godforsaken reason, thereby creating the question of: why have there been no kings since this Ganondorf?

The flashbacks with Ganondorf took place well over 10,000 years ago, considering the first recorded Calamity took place 10,000 years before BotW. Fast forward 9,900 years ago, and we have the plot important Calamity that leads to BotW. Fast forward 100 more years, and we have Link waking up in the Shrine of Resurrection.

And yet . . . there is not a single Gerudo voe.

The magic law governing the sex of Gerudo babies doesn't specify that the previous king has to have fully died before a new one can be born. We can assume that's usually the case given Gerudo aren't known to live past 100 without magical intervention, but that's not part of it as far as we know. So even though Zombiedorf's crusty ass was hibernating underground, there should have been, what, at least 100 kings after him? There at least should have been one EITHER during the first Calamity, or born around the time Link woke up in the Shrine of Resurrection (with "around the time" including a time frame like a couple decades or so).

But there isn't one, and Gerudo Town is instead led by a chief. And further, men are (usually) not allowed inside.

Which makes me think that, after Ganondorf decides to go full Demon King . . . maybe the Gerudo said, "we're sick of this shit, no kings ever again." In other words, when a boy is born to a Gerudo mother, he is NOT sent back to Gerudo Town when he's old enough to talk, but is instead raised as a Hylian.

If we consider Sonia and Rauru's Hyrule to be Hyrule 3.0 (which it kind of has to be), this is not the first time a Gerudo King has made life worse for his people. In OoT, the Gerudo were regarded as thieves because of IRL racism / colorism lbr and Ganondorf actively made things worse for them by trying to take over Hyrule, having Koume and Kotake brainwash Gerudo who didn't fall in line, etc. In one branch of the timeline, this led to the Gerudo being left to drown in the Great Flood. In another branch (the one that leads to Twilight Princess) we don't see them at all, suggesting that they were perhaps driven from Hyrule's borders after Ganondorf's bs was brought to light and he was put on trial. And then we have the timeline merge and this Ganondorf, who again took them to war and transformed himself into a demon king and just overall fucked over his people. When you consider all of that, along with the fact that we don't have a single good Gerudo King in recorded history . . . it's not too much of a stretch, I think, for the Gerudo women to say "no kings ever again, no men allowed in Gerudo Town aside from Princess Zelda's twink."

And thus, the 100+ sons that would have come after Ganondorf . . . were raised as Hylians.

(Of course, if one of these AMAB Gerudo-raised-as-a-Hylian later realized she was a transgirl, she would be welcome in Gerudo Town. But she wouldn't be there to take the throne. She's just there to be with her sisters. Transvai are vai and welcome in Gerudo Town. Just no voe, except Princess Zelda's twink.)

So if we consider this a possibility, then it could be that there is actually a Gerudo voe—who wouldn't acknowledge himself as Gerudo since he was raised Hylian—in present day Hyrule. Someone with dark skin, tall, with a muscular build, accustomed to warm climates . . .

Someone like Tauro.

[nevermindigotthis]

Back on the bullshit!!! Yeah, sorry, four images of canon Skulduggery Pleasant stuff was too much, now I‘m back fangirling over the Dead Men Walking AU by @purplejabberwock. I‘m currently rereading book 6 and I‘m celebrating with this drawing of Solomon Wreath, who is covered in sigils because he contains Lord Vile‘s Armor (it‘s a long, but very awesome story). Go check out this amazing AU! I won‘t rest until all of the SP fandom has read it!

[garfrigerator]

the only good change in the netflix series is in when the baudelaires use a battering ram in the vile village instead of a loaf of bread and water to errode the wall. i get mad everytime i read it in no way should that work

[just-ghaleon]

how about the vile tribe sisters? all 3 or whoever you like most

Have Xenobia and Royce testing Phacia's patience! ("Draw the Squad" pose by @croxovergoddess )

It's not easy being the middle sister.

[pastelhooman]

Just my (2) most precious plants

[emmettverhoogen]

thinking.

canonically, esmé never killed (or lemony who never investigated enough to let it implied in the texts) anyone with her own hands in the same way as olaf who has his fingerprints all over wherever he touches. but lemony insists she is as dangerous and wicked as count olaf.

there’s the quagmire fire mystery (or coincidence), but I don’t think esmé killed them to get the sapphires because she was basically in the same position mr. poe was with the baudelaire fortune after their parents died. I like the thought and theory though

there’s olivia, who died primarily because of esmé’s disinterest to see olaf sharing attention with somebody else, but there’s nothing other than the word of the carnival freaks that (legally, I guess, I don’t know, that’s a shower thought) links esmé to olivia’s death because esmé didn’t actually push her into the pit with her own hands.

there’s the baudelaire fire, but again, I don’t think she set that fire, and I’ll write a fic about it later, and as far as I remember lemony never let it be understood that he suspected esmé’s involvement in this fire.

so… what exactly did esmé do or is capable of doing to be considered as cruel as olaf?

I like the thought of her with her own gloved hands killing jacques in the vile village, although the biggest rival and the one who took the blame to the grave was olaf.

if jerome survived the hotel fire along with esmé, did she kill him soon after just to burn files that could compromise her in the future? did she seduce, buy, and kill more inconvenient people in the past?

that’s something I’d like to know in a new lemony book. just a mention of the crimes of esmé ??? to give me an idea of how a threat she is without olaf and the orphans in the way

or perhaps I’ll have to keep working on my own headcanons

[volleypearlfan]

there's a right-wing knockoff of Bluey called Chip Chilla. nothing is sacred in this world. Conservatives always complain about cartoons "not being for kids" (read: having LGBTQ+ representation), but Chip Chilla isn't for kids either - it's only for pearl-clutching moral guardians who want to feel good about the shows their children watch.

It's like how that doll line, Lammily, wasn't actually targeted towards kids or doll collectors -- it was only for parents and Buzzfeed bloggers who wanted a "wholesome" alternative to Barbie. Lammily faded into obscurity while Barbie is still going strong, so I don't think we have to worry about Chip Chilla replacing Bluey. Also, Rob Schneider is in it...gross

[sylvies-kablooie]

i hope we are better people now than in 2021

not to revive dead discourse but i just want to put it out there that they way the internet treated sophia dimartino during s1 of loki was cruel and if i see any of that going on again this time around i will block no questions asked. you are not "cool" for posting horrific harassment to the people behind a show you didn't like.