#vetinari x downey

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 44/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Downey POV, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December, typical sex acts you'd expect in this sort of thing:, Anal, Fingering, Blow Jobs, etc. - Freeform, some slurs show up in a sibling fight, there's potential dub-con - depending on where one's personal line is drawn Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

It is early days of this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp(?) between Downey and Vetinari--all very new, Vetinari would like to note that emotions are a bug and not feature. Downey is here to smoke a lot of cigarettes and be dramatic about things. However, the untimely murder of Downey's brother-in-law puts a bit of a wrench in things, made worse by the announcement that his (estranged) father may or may not be dying soon. All deeply inconvenient for everyone involved. There are parallels of past and present because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life.

--- 

When Downey enters the soft, dark space of Vetinari’s bedroom the Patrician of Ankh-Morpork looks at him and then stops being the Patrician. Downey watches him stop being Patrician. For this moment of time, at least. It is like watching a man disrobe. There is this strange, ephemeral, fleeting vulnerability and Downey wonders what must his own face be like to prompt such a response from a man as glacial as Vetinari.

Downey says, ‘I don’t do that.’

‘What is it that you don’t do?’

‘I’m alright.’ Downey stands, still, in the doorway of the secret passage he enters through because they cannot be obvious about anything. They’ll never be able to be obvious about anything. Even in death they’ll keep their secrets, this thing between them being a large one. Amos will be buried in the family plot and when Annette dies, she will be buried next to him. Downey will be buried at the Assassins’ Guild. Vetinari will be buried somewhere. Downey doesn’t know what arrangements he has made.

‘Drink?’ Vetinari asks.

‘Please.’

‘What is it that you don’t do?’

‘Whatever you were preparing for,’ Downey accepts the whiskey. ‘Don’t worry, I won’t weep on you. I won’t sully the sheets or anything.’

Vetinari’s mouth thins but he says nothing on that, only motions to the edge of the bed for Downey to sit on since there is only one chair in the room and it is the desk chair, currently occupied by a stack of books. Vetinari had been reading in a dressing gown, sitting atop of the sheets on account of the heat.

‘Well,’ Downey sighs, sinking against a bedpost. ‘He’s dead.’

Well - it is done. Thus, Always (2.0) is completed. 

Thank you all so much for coming on this incredibly long, sometimes slow, ride! It means a lot and I hope everyone had fun along the way. Everything after this are epilogues and appendixes! Including a letter from Joss telling us who was in that file Downey filched for him.

(gotta say, big shout-out to ahufflepuffhobbit who listened to me talk about Jocelyn and Downey non-stop for like ten months straight.)

(also big shout-out to dellevigne who kindly lets me go !!!!!!!!! about Downey at them from time to time.)

(also also big shout-out to squadron-of-damned who is why I restarted Thus Always in the first place.)

thank you all! <3 <3 <3

[zakalwe-the-ninth]

Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Relationships: Havelock Vetinari/Samuel Vimes, Sybil Ramkin/Samuel Vimes Characters: Havelock Vetinari, Samuel Vimes, Sybil Ramkin, Angua von Uberwald, Carrot Ironfoundersson, Lord Downey (Discworld), Original Male Character(s)

Additional Tags: vetvimes, Established Relationship, Secret Relationship, Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Emotions everywhere, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Break Up, Blood and Violence, Oral Sex, Hand Jobs, Some Attempts at Plot, Please Disregard the Holes, Narrativium at Work, Sybil is...less fine with this than she thought., Polyamory Done Wrong, Can Open, Worms Everywhere Series: Part 3 of Balancing Act Series

Summary:

Vimes scowled. Vetinari noticed and continued, mildly, “I would remind you, Vimes, that we have agreed it is best that this remains a clandestine affair, given the situation.”

“I know.”

“A fact that does make blackmail a possibility.”

“I know.”

“And yet, Commander, you are still attempting to disrobe me in a public area.”

“Attempting being the operative word there, sir. Could you give me a hand, do you think? This button's stuck.”

Vimes and Vetinari have been attempting to balance their secret relationship with the running of the city. But now it seems their secret is out, and as the people they care for are threatened, painful choices are needed.

Sequel to Balancing Act and Leverage, although can be read straight after Balancing Act if you want and will still make sense.

M rating is for smut in Chapter 1.

[asongaboutpirates]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Havelock Vetinari/Samuel Vimes Characters: Samuel Vimes, Havelock Vetinari, Lord Downey (Discworld), Mustrum Ridcully, The Bursar (Discworld) Additional Tags: Established Relationship, Banter, Past Abuse, Vulnerability Summary:

Vimes has always been a man of direct action, and living among the nobs hasn’t changed that.

[squadron-of-damned]

Inktober, day 7 - Exhausted

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Downlock! That’s generally the tag that’s been used for it in my experience

Also yessss more the merrier in Vetinari/Downey delight 🖤🖤🖤

The Vetinari Hogswatch shipping forecast day 2- Lord Downey / Lord Vetinari

Enemies to lovers but add in a load of childhood rivalry and teenage hormones into the mix, then leave to marinate for 30 years of civil service and professional rivalry. Stir and serve hot, but do be careful to run it past a food-taster first.

[elsinore-and-inverness]

peggio del capo precedente - snapcase era - vetinari & downey & ludo - playlist 

Voilà le Soir Qui Tombe -  Les Misérables Original French Concept Album // Restless Year - Ezra Furman // The Prayer of François Villon (Molitva) - Regina Spektor // Blue Prelude - Nina Simone // Cutting Stone - The Decemberists // Other Side - SZA, Justin Timberlake // Bad Year - The Spook School // bury a friend - Billie Eilish // For All We Know - Nina Simone // Severed - The Decemberists // Body Was Made - Ezra Furman // Empty Chairs At Empty Tables - Les Misérables // You Don’t Have To Be A Scientist To Do Experiments On Your Own Heart - Jeffrey Lewis // Master of Art - Laura Stevenson // Butterfly - Kehlani // All The Rowboats - Regina Spektor // Tutti i miei sbagli - Subsonica  // Very Good Bad Thing - Mother Mother // No Children - The Mountain Goats // Body of Years - Mother Mother // Incantevole - Subsonica

Photo: Ware Collection of Blaschka Glass Models of Plants, 2008

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 38/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Characters: Lord Downey (Discworld), Havelock Vetinari, Samuel Vimes, Johan "Ludo" Ludorum, there is a whole cast of characters, Willis Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Downey POV, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December, typical sex acts you'd expect in this sort of thing:, Anal, Fingering, Blow Jobs, etc. - Freeform, some slurs show up in a sibling fight, there's potential dub-con - depending on where one's personal line is drawn Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

---

Obligatory excerpt: 

‘I have something for you,’ Vetinari says before Downey can pass him. Vetinari blinks at him for a moment before explaining, ‘I finished that book you were interested in. I think you’ll like it.’

Downey chews on the thought of what Vetinari could be on about. Comes to no clear conclusion so must ask: ‘Which book?’

‘The uh…you know it, Downey. The um…the mushroom one. Enabling Entanglements.’

‘Oh…right.’

Vetinari stops at his own door. He wobbles for a moment, Downey grabbing his shoulder saying, ‘steady on. Go lie down or go back to vomiting. Standing isn’t working for you.’  

‘No,’ Vetinari shakes his head then seems to regret it. ‘I wanted to ask—do you want it? Now, I mean. I can get it.’  

Downey stares at Vetinari whose nose is too large, whose hair is nothing remarkable, whose skin is cadaverously pale, whose mouth doesn’t quite fit with the remainder of his face, whose ears are a little large—everything being slightly off—but whose eyes are nice, though. That mountain-lake at dawn blue.

‘Sure,’ Downey replies, ‘why not. I’ll take it now. When’s it due back at the library?’

‘It’s not. I bought a copy. You can have it. It’s your birthday, right?’ Vetinari steps inside his room, leaving the door ajar so Downey can also step inside should he wish. Downey determines it enough of an invitation so invites himself in.

The room is unlived-in levels of neat—to the point Downey feels his existence may be ruining the space for he is sweaty and dishevelled and stinking of fags and booze. By the window, though, is a snake-fern. Not unlike Downey’s one. He thinks there’s something in that. Something, something, something—he’s not being terribly bright at the moment.

Downey at one-and-twenty is not much brighter than Downey at twenty. Also Vetinari tanked off Quirmian (French) 75s is never not funny 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

‘Scag,’ Downey snarls. 

‘Downey,’ Vetinari greets before backing off. ‘I wasn’t sure if you were one of the Patrician’s thugs.’ 

‘I am clearly not a thug.’ 

‘You weren’t dressed in your blacks.’ 

Downey takes in the formless, dark greyish thing Vetinari is wearing with a lifted eyebrow. At least he looks good and not like a blob. 

William A. Downey, focusing on the important things in life: looking cool and not like a formless blob. 

Vetinari refrains from pointing out that the important thing in life is staying alive. Downey would say he knows this, but he’s so handsome no one would dare ruin his face. Vetinari would reply: life doesn’t work like that, you do know that right? 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Consider Downey eventually getting his doctorate, Vetinari has the city so everything stopped being so much on fire for five minutes, he has some money, he could go on his own field trip - not the Grand Sneer, mind you, just to, you know, explore, see different cultures, collect exotic rare poisonous plants, see what delightful alcohol is made over there.

Of course, when he comes back, nobody believes that he made it to the Counterweight continent, that's bullshit, it's walled-off (yeah, but assassins don't see walls as obstacles), and sure he's made friends, but why don't they never write? (Maybe because communication to and from is very limited? Downey offers, but yes, it'd be nice to exchange letters here and there.)

But after the Silver Horde gets the hold of Agatean Empire and letters and later clacks become regular, Downey gets in touch with all those people he's made friends with and who were honestly pretty thrilled about that one time he got painted as a tiger (because tigers are awesome!).

And it's all fine and dandy until one of the friends sends Downey a copy of a book he's working on, and Downey who can speak Agatean but not read (because the pictograms are even worse with way more wiggly lines) takes it to Vetinari, because Vetinari can read agatean (gods know why he learned), and Vetinari has a Very Difficult Time to keep his face neutral because he's just gotten into his hands the Discworld Art of War and Downey had apparently seen its author more hungover than sober most of the time.

I love that today is the day for "what if" asks with my peak favourite characters. This delights me to no end.

Downey would take himself on the most decadent, obscenely lush Tour that ever happened. He'd show Vetinari the itinerary and Vetinari is like 'I feel that at some point this is going to kill you, however you are so incredibly pleased with yourself about the entire situation I shan't infringe.'

yeah, but assassins don't see walls as obstacles

Especially not Downey. Who sees anything that involves Rule Breaking as a Fun Challenge. Something to pass the time. He likes puzzles - not the wordy kind Vetinari is so keen on - but the practical physical kind.

Downey is the sort of person to be faced with the riddle "there's a fork in the road and two angels guard the paths forward. One path will lead to death, the other to life. One angel always tells the truth, the other one lies. They know which they are. They know where the two paths go. You may ask one yes or no question. What do you ask to determine which path leads to freedom?" with like "well, I poison both and then send people I don't like down each path and take the option that didn't result in the horrific death of one of the participants."

Vetinari: that's not the solution, Downey.

Downey: it's A solution.

Vetinari: you're supposed to ask a question.

Downey: I ask them: would you like some tea?

Vetinari:

Vetinari: I hate that you followed the rule that it's a yes/no question.

Downey: if they say no, I just stab them.

--

Tigers *are* awesome!

(Vetinari: I am aware of this)

--

I love the idea that Downey speaks Agatean but can't read it and Vetinari can read it but can't speak it. I love that between them, they one whole person who is fluent. It's so very them and I think it beautiful.

Downey is like, 'wow this takes my dyslexia to whole new levels' and his friend Discworld!Sun Tzu is like, 'you know, it's fine. I'll just read everything to you.'

(Vetinari learned Agatean because he was bored one summer and that's just the sort of man he is.)

Vetinari gets really into the Art of War mostly because it's things like: The supreme art of war is to subdue the enemy without fighting. And Let your plans be dark and impenetrable as night, and when you move, fall like a thunderbolt.

--

I love this entire thing as a premise and have accepted it into my head as canon.

In other news, you should maaaaaybe write?? it??

<3 <3 <3

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 18/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Downey POV, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December, typical sex acts you'd expect in this sort of thing:, Anal, Fingering, Blow Jobs, etc. - Freeform, some slurs show up in a sibling fight, there's potential dub-con - depending on where one's personal line is drawn, it's in chapter 16 for those who want to know Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

---

Obligatory Excerpt: 

‘You,’ Vimes finally manages to get out. ‘You broke into my Watch House.’

‘Absolutely not.’

‘You broke into my Watch House and tampered with my evidence.’

‘I would never.’

Vimes continues to prowl. His colleague shifts her gaze from the Commander to Downey back to the Commander. Vimes meets her eye prompting a silent exchange. Her head tilts a fraction to the side.

‘I’m going to have to bring you in,’ Vimes says.

‘On what charges?’

‘Breaking and entering into the Watch House.’

[...]

‘Still,’ Slant touches his hat, ‘I would like to know such things in the future. Good-day, your lordship. I will see you anon for council. Oh, before I forget, I was bidden to tell you that his lordship the Patrician would like a word at your earliest convenience.’ Slant gives Downey a significant look which Downey finds offensive. ‘I shan’t speculate what it is he wishes to address with you, but if it doesn’t have to do with this recent drama I would be deeply surprised. And, in my long tenure at this firm, I have very, rarely been deeply surprised.’

Downey decides that his earliest convenience will be in half an hour. Time enough to buy an espresso, a pack of rolling papers, and stand for some time gossiping with Tess who owns his favourite tobacco shop.

-

‘We are overdue for a conversation,’ Vetinari states without preamble.

Things get intense and Downey and Vetinari have a wee quarrel 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 27/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Downey POV, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December, typical sex acts you'd expect in this sort of thing:, Anal, Fingering, Blow Jobs, etc. - Freeform, some slurs show up in a sibling fight, there's potential dub-con - depending on where one's personal line is drawn Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

----

Obligatory Excerpt: 

‘I am attempting to make sure this,’ Vetinari makes a hand gesture to indicate them, ‘works. You’re being absurdly difficult about it, and I don’t understand why.’

‘I’m not being difficult, I’m having opinions and telling you what I think without the niceties of public office making it so I say things like: I do wish we could determine an appropriate approach to the situation to ensure that it works in such a manner as to benefit both of us, your lordship, however in doing so may I endeavour to make a few small suggestions—of course, your lordship need not take them on board, but I would appreciate if they were at the very least taken under advisement. Rather than: I want this to work, too, and I’ve got standards the same as you do for these things and if you get to list yours then I damn well get to list mine.’ A sharp intake of breath. Downey rubs fingers over his eyes. ‘I’m tired, I’m not at my most eloquent.’

Vetinari’s mouth folds down into a slight frown, it’s a bit of a puckered fish expression. Downey isn’t certain how to reroute the conversation onto something else since if they keep hammering away at this point they’re at risk of breaking, nail, wood, and hammers. The puckered fish expression then changes into slight appraisal. Downey waits for Vetinari’s assessment of the situation. He presumes there will be some quasi-scathing rebuttal then the matter will be put to rest for the time being. He hopes Vetinari is true to his word about separation of spheres of life because if the Guild is hit with a sudden audit request in three months, Downey is going to be deeply annoyed.

Because he is damn serious when he says there’ll be no games when it comes to them. Political games are fine, it comes with the territory. Downey is too old and too tired for personal games.

If they were twenty or five-and-twenty, he might find it more appealing. There was something about sleeping with someone vicious and it made you vicious and then you clawed each other’s skin off and set fire to the mattress. There was also a lot of vodka and fags and never enough sleep. A messy few years, there. And, barring one or two people (it’s a small list, and one was post-first-love rebound), it was filled with mind games and nonsense and, frankly, absolute shite—needless to say Downey’s well pleased to have gotten it out of his system and is willing to leave it in the past and never revisit it.

One inkling of Vetinari going the route of one or two of Downey’s past mistakes and Downey will pole vault himself out the window.

The hypothetical metaphorical window.

Vetinari you’re supposed to comfort your maniac of a boyfriend, not argue with him. 

To be fair, they do shag in this chapter and they manage to move on past this stupid argument.

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 14/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December, typical sex acts you'd expect in this sort of thing:, Anal, Fingering, Blow Jobs, etc. - Freeform Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

 ----- 

Hurrah! AO3 has returned unto us. 

Obligatory excerpt: 

‘So,’ Downey sets the coffee aside, ‘what, exactly, do you want me to do? I can’t give you an alibi, the Commander’s already taken my statement and going back on it will only throw more fuel on the fire.’  

‘I want you to look into it. Don’t make that face, Will, it’s ugly. Whatever happened to your eye isn’t helping, either. We’re a handsome family, let’s keep it that way. I want you to look into it because I don’t trust anyone else—’

‘Beg pardon, Sicily, but you trust me?’

‘No. But you’re my brother, at the end of the day, and you have jurisdiction.’

Downey smiles over his coffee, he knows it a mean and sneering look. ‘This is strictly the purview of the Watch. Unfortunately.’

‘I thought…’ she eats a biscuit. Dusts fingers off on a small napkin, the starched cotton sitting neatly on her knee. ‘I thought, if it was a botched assassination, or one of your lot gone rogue, you were allowed to deal with it?’

‘Sure, but that isn’t the case.’

‘I thought,’ she repeats with great emphasis. ‘That if it was a botched assassination, or one of your lot gone rogue, you were allowed to deal with it.’

Downey is about to say he heard her the first time when the meaning clicks into place.

Gods bless Downey and his occasional slow uptake on a situation. 

Downey has some truly great Peak Himbo(tm) moments in his life. 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

‘My father’ll not die, you know,’ Downey declares. ‘His standards are too high. The afterlife won’t suit him. Which is rather annoying, now that I think on it. So much spite in a single person and because of it we’re all left waiting for him to cark it—’ 

‘Cark it?’ 

‘A phrase I have adopted from my sixth form as I find it delightful. I’ve taken to sprinkling it into my day-to-day speech. Anyway, we’ll be salted, stringy bits of meat left out for winter preservation by the time he finally goes.’ 

Vetinari’s eyes widen a fraction, he tilts his head back to look at the ceiling. Downey drinks his coffee, victorious. 

As afterthought Downey adds, ‘He’ll leave a not inconsiderable amount of scar tissue, I suspect. It’ll be like ripping an arrow out backwards. One of those nasty ones with the notched heads that make it impossible for the wound to heal right.’  

Another moment of reflection from Vetinari. Downey wonders if perhaps he should stop speaking because whenever he goes on, in the hopes of sparking a response, Vetinari just gets more and more…something. His face is neutral while, at the same time, doing gymnastics. Downey marvels at him. 

‘How are the plants?’ Vetinari asks after a not inconsiderable pause. 

Vetinari and Downey having a completely normal one.

Downey would like everyone to know, especially the Patrician, that he completely fine about everything happening in his life right now and is, in fact, being very normal about it. 

Dear readers, he lies. 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 11/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Downey POV, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

-- 

Obligatory Excerpt: 

As a young man he [Downey] had been a half-decent musician, provided he was putting in the effort. One or two tutors had suggested he do something with it, career wise, but it never interested him beyond a pleasant manner in which to pass time. There had been a brief stint, when he was learning the guitarra, wherein he discovered Vetinari’s distaste for all things musical which resulted in Downey’s most prolific period of song-creation. All of them mocking. All of them deeply annoying. All of them titled something along the lines of: Dog-botherer has a stupid face.

(Gods, he was a menace. It’s a marvel Vetinari has let by-gones be by-gones.)

A past mistake, distant past, was a painter—Alexander Rossi—who was taken with the cello and informed Downey that he was his muse and insisted Downey play as he painted. Which flattered Downey for a time until he became tired of being projected on and reinterpreted for the sake of Art. Things between them ended savagely. To say the least.

His Sleeping With Artists Phase was one of the messier cluster of years in his life. But what is the mid-twenties for but being a bit of a disaster? That said, not all were bad. Lorenza Montes, flautist and pianist, was an overall pleasant time. Harriet Price, poet, could have been worse. Charles—well, if he hadn’t been such a hypochondriac…anyway.

Diverging thoughts. He’s waiting for Vetinari. He’s attempting a new piece. He’s not thinking about familial nonsense. He’s wondering if Charles is still alive after pretending to die for six months in order to end things between them. Downey had pointed out, several times, that he is a doctor by training, alongside an Assassin, therefore well acquainted with death and dying and he can, in no uncertain terms, assure Charles that he is distinctly not dying.

I’m sure some of you will be pleased to know that this is the first chapter to earn us that explicit rating. 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 12/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Significant Age Difference, between downey and one of his past Decisions, like. Significant., it's very very May-December, typical sex acts you'd expect in this sort of thing:, Anal, Fingering, Blow Jobs, etc. Series: Part 3 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

-- 

Obligatory Excerpt: 

William focuses on his cards. His father’s gaze burrowing into his skull, he wants to protest this assessment. He isn’t selfish! Indeed, he is well equipped to handle things when they don’t go to his liking. He does it – did it – all the time at the Guild.

Exhibit A: Vetinari, that scag, was made his lab partner in applied poisons for three years in a row. William informed Dr Tindel that this was a deplorable state of affairs but his favoured professor remained uninterested in altering the seating arrangement.

Once it became clear no cajoling would work to budge the Dog-botherer on and get someone decent in as a lab-partner William gave up and likes to think he accepted the situation with grace. He can bear ignominy nobly.

Can you, Downey? Can you bear ignominy nobly? I have some reservations on this front. 

[thiswaycomessomethingwicked]

Chapters: 5/44 Fandom: Discworld - Terry Pratchett Rating: Explicit Relationships: Lord Downey/Havelock Vetinari, Downey/Others Additional Tags: let your dad die energy drink is a direct inspiration for my restarting this story, everything is a poison, it's the dose that matters, Family Issues, Period-Typical Homophobia, Classism, AM is an early modern city, and so the values/social norms reflect that, Not Beta Read, We Die Like Men, Downey POV Series: Part 4 of coveting desperate things Summary:

After No More a Desolate Thing Downey and Vetinari are muddling through this thing called a ReLaTiOnShIp. Unfortunate segues into the past which runs parallel to the present occur namely because families are a sticky business, always, and things that happened thirty years ago have a strange ability to cycle back through your life. Oh, and there's been a death.

[I have rewritten Thus, Always because I wanted to finish the story but had left it too long to pick it back up and start where I left off, so I just redid the whole thing. There are differences between the OG Thus, Always and this one. This one still works within the broader AU timeline of Murder Flat stories etc.]

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Obligatory Excerpt: 

‘And how are you?’ Downey asks, turning towards his niece. ‘Still reading Mrs. Longford, I see. I heard this one is quite gruesome.’

Rebecca slowly smiles, ‘I read the first half last night, straight through, my hair standing on end the entire time.’

‘Excellent. Have you tried any by Ms. Hewitt?’

‘Will,’ Magda sighs, ‘we’ve discussed this. She doesn’t need encouragement. This is hardly appropriate reading material for a young lady.’

‘All the girls at school are reading it,’ Rebecca protests. ‘And they read Ms. Hewitt, too. Not to mention Mr. Miller and A.S. Vandemeer. There’s nothing so bad in it that they shouldn’t be read, I think. It’s a morality tale—’

‘A morality tale,’ Magda laughs. ‘I should hardly think so. Will—tell her.’

Downey balances tea on his knee to tilt his hand this-way, that-way. ‘First, I’m not sure I’m the one to speak on morality, in a broad sense. Assassin and all. But, I can see Rebecca’s argument. Take stock of what Count Hergen, or whoever the relevant titular character is, gets up to and reverse your thinking. You don’t want to behave like him. He was damnably witty though. I’m looking forward to the next instalment of his adventures.’

Magda’s eyes widen a fraction, pure exasperation. Rebecca smiles, prim, proper, and victorious.

Downey is the chaotic, queer Wine & Gin Uncle that we all deserve in our lives