#very real possibility of seeing my ex while out n about if it happens n she wanted to be petty n i thought itd be funny but the plan is just
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lilacxquartz · 2 months ago
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under his authority;
officer kenjaku x f!reader
plot: finally ridding yourself of your problematic ex, he comes back in the worst possible form — themes: yandere kenjaku, (eventually) willing reader, stalking, dubcon, manipulation, he/him pronouns for kenjaku, mundane au — w.c: 3.5k — a/n: considered making this a shorter one shot, but an idea wouldn’t leave my head — warnings: extremely dubious consent, but reader is willing by the end — masterlist • ao3
Every night before you headed off to sleep, you would take the extra effort to barricade yourself in your apartment, with all sorts of intricate preparations in place… just to keep him away. You’d lock the windows, put up a bar against the front door, tuck a chair underneath the door handle of your bedroom, and sleep with a knife within reach—just in case.
Deep down, however, you knew that it was all pointless in the long run. You could never truly get rid of him, not even if you traveled to the very ends of the earth (or left it entirely). Your ex was simply not the type to let go and even though nothing had yet happened in your year alone without him, you knew that from the moment that you’d let your guard down, that he’d strike.
See, you knew him perfectly well and the sly way that he approached every little intricacy in life. He dated you for a couple of years, bending and twisting your life into all sorts of directions like a puppet on a string, swaying and meddling with the cross, having you thinking that you were the one in the wrong the entire time when it was his manipulation having you feel that way all along.
At some point, you woke up to it all however, and simply just left—choosing to start somewhere else entirely, ready to put up a fight if need be—but to your surprise, he never followed you. This is why perhaps you knew that you were in more danger than you could comprehend because if you knew one thing about him, it was that he had a penchant for holding onto grudges (and never letting anything, or anyone, go).
Such a suspicion was sorely implied however, when out from the corner of your eye on every other occasion, you would spot a glimpse of him. For a while, you thought that they had finally gotten to you; that they had driven you to complete and utter insanity, if you must have been seeing them in places that didn’t make sense. You sought help for that one however you could; through countless reports made through a system that didn’t take you seriously for whatever reason and then, later, through the means of therapy, which did help for a while. Just as you thought that he was out of your life, however, he started showing up again and in full force, too.
Your reports, just like before, meant nothing at all. All of those reports of stalking and someone lingering around your home, of your windows being scratched on and at your doors rattling during the odd hours of the night, only to be dismissed with the ask of ‘have they hurt you yet?’ or the claim that the evidence was still inefficient, so please only make such a report again if you have something to prove.
Such a ridiculous system, but that’s why you went to such great lengths to take things into your own hands. You had no choice, so what else were you otherwise supposed to do?
You were certain that all of those strange happenings were him, after all.
You weren’t going crazy.
It wasn’t like moving on was helping, anyway. His presence was constant and overwhelming, following you around like your own shadow. You were perhaps being driven crazy indeed, but it wasn’t your own doing as everyone else had otherwise claimed. You knew that deep down, these weren’t desperate illusions cast from a worn-down mind, but rather that they were strikingly real and he was surely toying with you, unable to let you go after a hasty, unspoken breakup, hell-bent on punishing you for daring to have a spine.
And just like every other time, everything was all locked up and ready to go; you were as safe as you could get. You did your usual clean sweep of everything and found nothing that could hint at danger, and yet, just as you had settled into bed… you heard something from the inside.
Tearing upright from your bed, you grabbed your phone in a hurry, dialing the police and urging that this time, this wasn’t a drill, that there was someone actively in your home so to please, please, send someone over and just because the claim was so desperate and dire, they did indeed send someone, reassuring you that it would be soon and to please, stop fretting so much. Such a soothing gesture threw you off guard a little, the pattern of the sentence piquing your interest as something once familiar, but your sleepy mind didn’t make the full connection just yet.
You opened up the door as soon as they knocked too, not thinking all that hard about just how on earth they knew which door in the block called for such a thing to begin with. You were exhausted, after all, worn down from a full year of constantly doubting your own mind, of course, your judgment was hazy. All it took was a bit of correctly applied confidence and a smooth, reassuring voice to render you compliant, to slip downstairs along with them under the claim that you would be going to the station to take a statement before you realised the chilling truth that slipped right past your nose.
That voice.
Those mannerisms.
It was him—you were with him.
You tugged at the car door, desperate to suddenly break free and yet he had you securely confined right in the back of his vehicle, driving you off into some unknown location without a single second to spare.
“You… how did you—” you spat out, your voice faltering in disbelief.
“You know, you should really practice better judgment when you’re tired, hm?” He spoke, his voice sickeningly condescending yet calm and sweet. “And now you’re in trouble. Oh dear.”
In protesting refusal, you kicked at the seat with your heel in an attempt to get them to slow the vehicle at least and plot your escape and yet, he seemed to handle such violent complaint with calculated ease, as if knowing your attempts were futile, as if knowing that he had already won.
“Let me go, you asshole,” you spat, continuing to knock on the seat.
Yet, they continued to remain infuriatingly composed, adjusting the mirror in the dark, allowing you to catch a glimpse of their coal-black eyes in the passing streetlights that phased through the road. He clicked his tongue in amusement before swerving the car off to an emptier road, forcing your body to hurl to the side in a grounding warning. “Careful,” he said, his voice laced with a cold threat, “you’re in no position to make such demands, now are you?” he asked, the reminder of your compromised circumstances hanging in the air. “Believe it or not, my role is genuine in this exchange and I could approve a warrant for your arrest if you’re not careful, so you would be wise to calm down and listen to me. How does that sound?”
“Arrest?” you scoffed. “For what?”
“Well, it could be anything, really,” he mused, calmly driving once more, “but let’s try those narcotics that I planted in your home—quite bad ones too, they would get you into a whole wealth of trouble—especially given those paranoid reports you’ve been making. Am I really that bad that you consider me a daily nuisance? I haven’t done anything that wrong, surely.”
You blinked. “You have been stalking me.”
However, all that he could do was huff out a humourless laugh as he composed a response, “Interesting claims, but I think you’ll find that I have evidence of me being busy at work for the good remainder of the year, but…” he paused, considering a pint, “how sweet of you to think of me so often. Have I been on your mind that often? Maybe you’re seeing things you want to see.”
“I wouldn’t want to see you at any time at all, you damned stalker—” you repeated, only for him to interrupt you.
“—stalker?” he asked in a completely deadpan tone, though there was a thin jab of mockery laced within it. He parked the vehicle off to the side of a lesser traveled road where the lights couldn’t quite reach before sitting with you in a stagnant silence for a while. When he finally broke the quiet, he spoke up again in a hushed tone, as if careful to not be heard (even though it was just the two of you in the car), “your claims aren’t entirely baseless, I have been… keeping tabs, but I have been careful,” he admitted, “I have been eliminating all traces of evidence from the moment that anything surfaced, ridding myself of anything compromising. You can try and rattle me out to the authorities if you wish, I won’t stop you, but you won’t get very far.”
“Was the break-up that significant that you can’t leave me alone?” you redirected.
Another silence brewed between the two of you, but then he quickly composed himself. “How silly of you to make such outrageous claims as if we were an item to begin with, but, I suppose that you could say that our time together was significant enough for me to be… conflicted about our parting, for a lack of better words.”
“That’s a long and pointless answer to mean ‘yes’, but alright, you do you, Kenjaku,” you mumbled, crossing your arms as you sank back into the seat.
“And what would admitting such a thing do?” he asked, drumming his fingers along the hard leather of the wheel. “We were together for a moment and just as things were getting interesting, you walked out on me,” he added, not quite losing his track of words but still pausing for a moment to school their demeanour back into something better controlled. “...Let’s say that we did leave on a bad note, surely you can understand my confusion and… interest in picking up where things had left off?”
“I understand the need for wanting answers,” you admitted, “but it doesn’t justify stalking, surely.”
“It justifies my need for closure,” Kenjaku corrected, “and now that I have you back in my hands, I think you’re overdue for some long-awaited discipline, don’t you think? Luckily for you, I’m surprisingly fair with how I deliver it, so I won’t hurt you, but I do have something in mind for the way you humiliated me.”
“Humiliated?” you scoffed yet again, although given his lack of immediate reply, you had an uneasy wave of dread pass you by with the hanging implication of what was yet to come. Something felt off, but they weren’t being clear with their delivery.
Before you knew it, he suddenly got out of the car and slammed the door shut, leaving you alone in the back of the police car for a beat, and then, without warning, tore open the back door, yanking you right outside. You landed on your bottom initially, but then he leaned you forward, pressing your chest against the dirt and cuffing your wrists right behind your back.
Pulling you up after, he slammed you into his car, caging you in with his looming overhead frame, making you feel suddenly quite small and trapped. He leaned in with his breath hot against your neck, allowing his pressing arousal to push into the small of your back while holding you in place.
“Humiliation is a two-way street, you know,” he whispered as he pulled down your jeans to your knees with your underwear following suit, “and I don’t think I can forgive such abandonment, at least not so soon.”
You remained frozen in place, realising exactly what he was planning to do, letting him talk as words refused to leave your own lips, “I always did like the lack of fight you put up during our time together,” he purred, “I bet it’s because you secretly like submitting to me like this, huh?”
His words were intentionally full of spite and mockery, but you were still confused and barely recovered from the extreme relationship they had you trapped in prior; it was an overwhelming time that left you with a piled-up emotional burden and nothing else beyond that point… but their touch admittedly, always succeeded in making you feel good in a way that nothing else or nobody else could compare. So skilled was the feel of his fingers over your skin—the only time he would ever listen to you.
“And what happened to your snark?” Kenjaku hummed, unzipping his slacks, dropping the pair to gather at his thighs, “I thought you had a lot to say just now? Did that all disappear too? Do you want me to make you feel good again? I bet none of those late-night hookups you’ve been having have been satisfying you the same way I ever could.”
It was humiliating alright, he knew exactly what you wanted and how you wanted. You loved it when he bit at your neck and when he pulled your hair just enough to make you feel good, but without long-lasting pain. You loved the way his hands would smack and smooth over your tender skin, bruising galaxies from his feverish touch. How his teeth would graze along the sensitive spots, making your life feel like putty in his hands; so malleable and yet so rigid, and yet, you knew fully well that he was bad for you.
He didn’t give you much time beyond that point to seek out confirmation, readily lining up the tip of their hardened cock to press into your soaked entrance, finding it almost peculiar at just how desperately soaked you already seemed to be. With a gentle push inside, he buried his shaft within your slick walls, easing into you slowly, taking his good, sweet time to get used to the feel of you again. Almost achingly slow, he pushed himself into your hilt and then back out, feeling almost insultingly delicate.
Kenjaku’s lips then lined up with your neck, peppering lazy kisses against your throat, but not surrendering to the heat of the moment like you almost desperately, guiltily craved. Such burning need that was evidenced by the full year of not being able to let you go and yet, now that he had you—he held himself off.
Albeit involuntarily, you drawled off a low whirring whine, arching your back into his form, letting him deepen his shaft into your core, yet never once accelerating as you hoped. Kenjaku remained infuriatingly composed and controlled, never once losing his cool, gently rolling his hips out and then back in, letting the need build up in you, yet never satisfying it.
“Such a needy thing,” he murmured, “what’s the magic word?”
“P-pl—” you were about to say, stopping yourself right as you were about to give in.
Kenjaku sucked at his teeth. “We’ll get there. You could never make me soft.”
He continued to roll his hips back and forth against you, nice and slow, pressing your body straight up against the cold, uncomfortably hard surface of the car with his uniform uncomfortably digging into your back. The coarse material roughly chafed through the thin fabric of the top you wore, rubbing painfully against you as all the wrong sensations were tackled instead.
It was painful, almost, and yet you felt your composure letting slip earlier than you would have liked, wanting nothing more than to give into the moment and for once, forget about him and what he put you through prior and just… feel good.
“P-please,” you gasped and then bit your lips, curling them into your mouth to stifle the remainder of the confession—humiliating, indeed.
He stilled for a second and you swore that you could feel his eyes bore into you with an almost feral resolve. For a while, he didn’t say a single thing and then, without warning, you cried out a choked-out whimper without registering exactly what had happened.
Suddenly, a deep, searing pain flooded your senses, making your eyes well with tears and spill in a matter of seconds. The realisation hit just a moment later, recognising the sensation as pain as he thrust repeatedly into your teased cunt at full force; his cock hitting right where it hurt and then without stopping, doing it again and again. Your reactions were poorly timed as you moaned out of sync with his feverish movements, pistoning himself into you with the driving force of someone crazed with reckless abandon. With such sawing aggression that emphasised just how needy he truly was, no matter the claims that otherwise left his lips, pinning the blame on you.
His hands then snaked around your chest but didn’t settle, reaching to wrap around your neck instead. His palms squeezed against your sensitive skin, choking out whatever pretty little noises you had left behind.
Your body recoiled slightly in pained protest as he continued to impale you; his hot breath rolling steamy pants of air that prickled against your clammy skin, pushing you closer towards the edge. His breathing became sloppier too, as he fucked himself as rough as he could into your sopping heat, quite literally spearing his length into you, until he couldn’t anymore. With one stuttering, rough, and final thrust, he melted into you entirely, crashing his body against yours as he filled you up with his own pent-up need. For a moment after, his hips gently bucked, albeit seemingly involuntarily as he sought to ride out the aftermath of his near-violent orgasm, only parting when he could quickly recompose himself and regain control over both of the situation—as well as you.
And after a while of such recovery—after helping you find your balance and dress you back up with almost attentive care—a darker thought slipped into his mind. Helping you sit back inside of the car, into the front this time, he let you quietly recover as he drove off somewhere else this time. Not to your home, nor to his, but… somewhere else entirely, because, if he was being real about you, he already knew that you wouldn’t give up on trying to get him into trouble—wouldn’t you? You silly thing. Oh no, he had to do something about that, and luckily for you, he had no such intention to kill you off, because you were the only thing in his life that he wanted to keep around for good and he had a good idea that you wanted this too, even if you were being so stubborn lately.
“Wait,” you piped up at long last, “where are we going?”
Kenjaku snorted out a half-laugh, finding your late realisation to be amusing before clearing his throat and answering you, “I’m not letting you go this time, so we’re taking a little detour—I’m going to keep you holed up with me forever,” he revealed, “maybe in chains at first as I figure out something more… permanent, but it’s all for a good cause, you know?”
You huffed, only to be interrupted, “A good cau—”
“—yes,” he replied in a matter-of-fact tone, “a good cause. I want to keep you forever, but I can’t have you running off on me. At least not again.”
You found yourself reacting in a way that surprised you, trying to sink into the seat again and kicking at whatever you could, but not as a means of escape, but rather out of frustration at your own mind. You could only respond in an uncertain murmur, still exhausted from the rough encounter, “You’re impossible, just… let me go,” you requested instead, although not sounding convincing to either him or yourself, knowing that it would probably be easier to just surrender instead.
“Oh you”, he endearingly cooed, smoothing his hand over your thigh, “I can’t do that. Not to you. But just know this, if you try to run away from me again, I’ll figure something out, maybe plant something compromising on you,” he replied, pausing for a moment to plot something out on the spot, “maybe have you arrested and locked up, because that way I can be sure to keep you in one place forever.”
You tilted your head off to the side, catching a glimpse of his thinly concealed mania burning in the depths of his eyes. “You wouldn’t go through that much, would you? You’re not that insane…”
Kenjaku however just shrugged, finding the calm conversation to be amusing, knowing that by even humouring him to this extent, you had already given up. “Just keep it in mind, will you? If it ever did come down to that, then guess who’s going to be the one to get you out to begin with?”
He let the implication hang in the air for a moment longer, before pushing you back further into the seat and finally letting go. “Anyway, rest up, will you? You have a lot of apologising left to do when we’re there and I fully accept you to be awake and alert for everything I have in store for you.”
You gulped, but you did as you were told, finally broken down enough to listen to him at long, long last.
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yanderederee · 7 months ago
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For the yandere mbti could you write for
Tr: Baji
Wind breaker: Togame Jo
Please (*'∀'*)
This is my first time writing for Togame, so I really hope I did him justice here!!♡
small reminder that these are yandere headcanons, so if characters seems ooc, that is why! pls be kind..!
yandere mbti event page : here!
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Baji Keisuke - RAHL
- Reverent:Aware:Honest:Lenient
Baji Keisuke might be a cruel motherfucker who has no qualms in being abrasive— but he will Never, EVER, be that way towards his darling.
Baji is extremely gentle and thoughtful of his darling always. It’s less of a reverent or worshipping type of love, as it’s more of a suffocating and careful love.
No one is trustworthy enough to be by your side. No one will take care of you or look out for you the same way he will.
Baji is and always will be your protector and shield against anything that would cause you mental or physical harm.
While it would make everything a lot easier if you would just love him back, Baji isn’t the type to delude himself into falsifying anything about you. He wants to real and true you. Even if the real you doesn’t love him, he is willing to accept that, because despite that, he truly does love you. And nothing will change that.
Baji’s aware that his actions can be suffocating or over the top, but does not give a single fuck, if it’s for your sake.
Loving Baji and accepting him for his brashness is definitely favorable, however. The further you grow from him, the more blood will be shed. The closer you are, the easier it becomes to protect you in less violent ways.
When it comes down to manipulation, Baji’s…. Okay, hear me out.
Canon Baji was able to very masterfully manipulate all of Toman into believing he was a deserter who betrayed them all. So canonically, Baji has the skills to manipulate people effectively.
However, I don’t think Baji likes actively lying to his darling. He’s not the type to think “no matter what, I need them to love me.”
So to me, I feel like Baji is more Honest about his actions. He will sugar coat it, so you don’t become weary of him, but he doesn’t like lying to you. Ex; “hah? What about your childhood friend? Yeah, I had a talk w’th ‘im… I might’a thrown a punch or two… so what, he started it. Tch… whatever, don’t worry about that loser anymore.”
It’s not like your feelings aren’t important to him though ! If he really thinks being too honest about his actions will permanently push you away or actively hate him, and he can help it, he will manipulate the truth for your benefit.
The last trait can be argued back and forth. I originally had him as a strict yandere, but the rules Baji has are less for you to follow, and more for everyone else.
I see Baji as a lenient Yandere who prioritizes your happiness and safety, instead of making you HIS possession.
Baji likes giving you freedom, because again, he wants to love you for who you are, not who he makes you be. So rather than limiting your ability to do things, he limits the possibly of bad things ever happening to you.
Still, Baji is very intense and if he thinks enough is enough, there’s no refuting it. At the end of the day, he is still the one with all the power over you.
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Togame Jo - RAML
- Reverent:Aware:Manipulative:Leanient
Togame has a tendency to idolize the ones he falls in love with. He is willing to sacrifice important parts of himself in order to make his darling happy.
He becomes so reverent in worshipping his darling, so much so that it becomes a widely known fact. There’s no one in town who breaths that doesn’t know of your relationship… even if you aren’t actually in a relationship.
He just loves you so much! Even if you aren’t interested (how?), Togame remains protective. “It ain’t gatta be true hun, no one’s gonna mess with ya now, n’ that’s what matters.”
Togame isn’t the type to fall into delusions. He might act delusional as a manipulative farce, but is generally aware that his love for you is obsessive and over the top. That’s fine.
He doesn’t expect you to love him back, but ultimately, that IS his end goal. Togame wants you to fall in love with him. To need him, and rely on him— of your own free will, not because he makes himself believe you do.
Of course, there’s no harm in bending the truth a little to achieve this, he thinks. Togame is very skilled in manipulating you. He lies constantly. Whispering in your ear make up lies your friends tell about you to everyone else, turning you against everyone until he is your only ally.
Always happy to play the role of the good guy in your eyes, swooping in to save you from a ring of bad guys (that he may have threatened into going to talk to you). Is ecstatic when you ask him to walk you home after being stalked for the last few nights (you still can’t tell it’s actually just him, purposely making you feel unsafe whenever he isn’t around for this very reason).
Togame considers keeping you on a tight leash. Having you all to himself, cooing in your ear daily about how complacent you’ve become to his love… but he imagines you becoming a shell of yourself, without any freedom.
As pleasurable of a thought keeping you locked up is to him, he can’t fathom losing you. He might have your body, but if he were to ever lose your love, voice, or smile, he would go insane.
Again, Togame would go insane without you. No matter how little of you he can have, he will always have something to crave, as long as you are you. Even if he must hurt people or himself in the process, he will worship you and happily take any scrap of attention you give him.
Togame is lenient with you for your sake, so don’t go messing that up by breaking his heart and trying to date other people…
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pumpkinstrawbrew · 1 year ago
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🆃🅷🅴 🆆🅸⨢.🅲🅷🅸🅽🅶 🅷△🆄🆁.
>>> the grim adventures of jon n' jack. feat batman n' spiderman. <<<
...
it was only a matter of time, before i would have made another crossover with those two. i can't deny, that they are very 1:1 for me, when it comes to comics supervillains. so why not to mix one awesome n' beloved thing with another? esp since funny enough, they do have quite a few similar plot-points. well, the halloween themed costume aside. i mean it goes as far as jack once having the bat-themed boyfriend pal, which reminds me of someone else, i know.
anyho'...
i've tried to make my notes more or less readable here, but they still might be a bit scattered. i attempted to keep them as short as possible, but i just cannot talk 'small'.
1. the first art is low-key based on underdeveloped AU, that i have about the early comic scarecrow n' modern jack meeting n' hitting it off serial killiar style. considering, that both of them possess killing methods, which have a noticable tradmark to it, i imagine that they will leave one hell of a mess behind, while traveling across the country. in that timeline, batman is dead. n' jack's shitty foster dad was killed off earlier on. neither of them knows what to do with themselves, since the people who they had *twisted* emotional conection with are gone. without any direction, they meet in the middle, n' decide that they can as well team-up n' try to make being a villain fun again. jon might experiment on their victims *or torture them if its his ex bullies* n' then give them to jack, who would scoop their brains out and put candle inside their skull. n' uh yeah, he literally did it in the comic. i was honestly surpised that marvel come up with smth that creepy. it really sounds more alined with dc, if anything. but either way, here they are. two *grieving* psychos going downtown. they will make one another so much worse, i imagine. n' they will totally kill that npc dude btw.
2. dark magic n' the drip. or jon n' jack at their corniest. like, jonathan looks like he watched too much the nightmare before christmas n' jack dress up like count dracula for no reason. it's so random-ish n' cheesy. but with this being said, i love both of those designs, n' think, that they really suit the vibe of comic issues in which they were featured. jack always came off as a he-witch to me, but it was nice to see it being played on in a different way. n' then, crane really rocks his own outfit as well. i totally need to draw him in it more often, haha. they dress up for a halloween party for real this time. n' well, i added batman n' spiderman into the mix here, bc i kinda wish that they got to fight / interact with those versions of jon n' jack. it would have been fun for a few reasons. also this can be technically counted as shipping art, but can be viewed as your typical gloating bad guy n' helpless hero thing too. n' to clear any possible questions, i only create stuff with adult peter parker. like cartoon era/late early comics, 20 smth one. i love my spiderman being of age, where he can legally mingle with his villains, not be detained at school lol.
3. the classic four from the timeline, when the comic plots were a bit more ligthearted. aka during the times, when the deadly mercenary n' crazy scientist were robbing banks, instead of harming *torturing* people. i love dark stuff, but there is charm to how 'simple' the scarecrow's and jack's goals once were. n' i love how the scarecrow used to do the lil, dorky dances. it really suits him. n' since at least 2 or maybe, most of jack o' lanterns are southernish in their roots like jon, i had an idea of them having a country dance *in the middle of graveyard* kinda just makes sense to me, haha. batman and spiderman merely happen to find them like that. n' well, it's kinda awkward. esp bc they technically don't do anything bad. i also imagine spiderman being like 'oh, so you have one of those too'. which is mostly a ref to how both the scarecrow n' jack were called 'the reject from land of oz' by other characters. they can rejoice here.
4. the develish & undead duo!! my friend once told me to try n' watch older superhero cartoons, and at first i was like 'welp, they prob be hella boring'. but then i caved in, n' watched a couple of superfriends episodes. as result, i fell in love with their scarecrow's desingh! it was unexpected tbh. usually, i prefer jon's older, classic scarecrow look. so no straw hair, less features exposed, just a hat n' a sack on his head, but their version of him actually did it for me. i find their crane both creepy n' cute. n' i also read on wiki, that he might be undead. so that bit interested me as well. non-human jonathan crane, what a concept! him returning from the grave just to be a menace to batman. n' to accompany him, there is an undead jack o' lantern from the ghost rider comic. his corpse literally got possessed by satan. anyways, both of them raised army of zombies. both of them undead n' prob won't ever get out of their spooky suits, since i don't think that they can. n' funny enough, jack's hometown was called sleepy hollows, if i remember correctly. so they can haunt people there, make it into a truly cursed land.
5. the last one was kinda spontaneous on my part. the other day, i was looking at what kind of action figures the scarecrow n' jack have. saw one, where jon was looking kinda strange, all black n' yellow. which is how i find out that he *apparently* got yellow lantern powers in newer comics, even if it was like for 10 seconds or smth. i didn't read the issue itself, but i found the idea kinda fun, n' his design was decent enough for me to get interested n' wonder what i can do with it. then, a bit later, i saw that jack had a venom-funko figure. i don't think, that he was ever canonically venomized in any of the actual comic issues, but once again, the mere idea of it happening was enough for me to consider doing smth with it. i mean, a venom-like tongue, but its made out of fire? dang. that's kinda cool. so yeah. the yellow lantern scarecrow n' symbiote jack o' lantern being the double trouble. if they weren't enough of a mean goblin-man before, now they surely will be.
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sushigirlali · 1 year ago
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Bad Idea Right? - Part II (Reylo Fanfic)
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Part I | Part II | Part III (Complete!)
Summary: Rey Niima realizes she may not be over Ben Solo when Hux’s social media posts show her ex-boyfriend may be moving on at Poe’s Halloween party. Donning a matching costume purchased before their breakup, Rey decides to stop running and confront him. Horny Halloween hijinks ensue!
Pairings: Rey/Ben, Rose/Hux, Finn/Poe
Continuity: Modern AU
A/N: Happy Halloween, rats!! May I present Part II of my holiday-themed fic, or as I like to call it: Rey, please get it together, babe, you’ve giving Ben whiplash 😵‍
Master list –> AO3 | ff.net | Tumblr
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Bad Idea Right? - Part II
By: sushigirlali
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Boston, MA
Friday, October 31
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Now I'm gettin' in the car, wreckin' all my plans
I know I should stop-, but I can't
And I told my friends I was asleep
But I never said where or in whose sheets
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A week passed and Ben didn’t text again. She would say he ghosted her, but that wouldn’t be fair. Expecting him to put himself out there again given how badly she’d bungled their chance of reconciliation was ridiculous. She had enough self-awareness to admit it to herself at least. 
So, in an effort to give him some peace, she had decided not to go to Poe and Finn’s Halloween party that night. Although she had broken up with Ben, they still had numerous mutual friends in common and she didn’t want to make the event awkward for him. 
Another mark against her going was that none of their friends actually knew why they had broken up as far as she was aware. She tried to make it seem amicable anytime the topic came up, but she could tell Finn and Rose both low key blamed Ben. It wasn’t fair, but she was too ashamed to give the real reason. 
They all knew about her upbringing in foster care, some of the trials and tribulations she went through, but none of them had lived it. And while her motives behind rejecting Ben’s proposal made sense to her, or they had at the time anyway, she didn’t expect her moderately well adjusted friends to understand.
For his part, according to Rose, Ben’s response when asked about their split was always, “Whatever Rey says happened is what happened.” He was too gracious by far and she didn’t deserve it. Or him. Which was why…
Rey started as her phone dinged loudly. Lowering the volume, she looked at the screen and saw that Hux, Rose’s boyfriend and Ben’s best frenemy, had posted something new on Instagram. Curious, she couldn’t remember the last time the stoic redhead had posted anything, Rey opened the notification.
“What the fuck!” She held the phone away from her like it had bit her. But quickly after, unable to help herself, she pressed on the photo and zoomed in and out on every possible angle. Whitehot anger blazed through her at the sight of Bazine, dressed like Jessica Rabbit, sitting on Ben’s lap, her arm around his shoulders while they laughed about something she couldn’t decipher.
The freeze frame was captioned, “Eddie and Jessica, who knew 👀,” and it made her want to throw things.
“So, he thinks he’s over me, huh?” Rey raged, nearly tripping over a new pile of unwashed clothes on the way to her closet. “He’s wearing our couples costume and he thinks he’s over me? We’ll just see about that!”
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And I pull up to your place, on the second floor
And you're standin', smiling at the door
And I'm sure I've seen much hotter men
But I really can't remember when
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Rey adjusted her very short green cheerleader skirt, checking that her ass was covered before stepping through Finn’s front door. He didn’t know she was coming, nobody did, and she supposed she should have let her friends know in case some major drama was about to start, but she wanted the element of surprise. She needed to catch Ben off guard to get a real reaction out of him; he was too good at schooling his features otherwise. 
Gingerly twisting the handle, she was relieved when it opened without her needing to call someone to let her in. Pushing the door halfway, a wave of loud club music and strobe lights assaulted her senses.
There was a mass of people moving to the music in the living room, the green velvet couch Finn was obsessed with pushed against the wall to allow for a makeshift dance floor. Cupping her hands over her ears, she slowly walked inside, squinting at the faces before her. 
When she didn’t see Ben, and no one paid her any mind, she moved past the study on her right and into the open concept kitchen. Through the glass doors that led to the patio, Rey could see several of her close friends gathered around a game of cornhole.
Rose and Hux were dressed as western Barbie and Ken (how Rose got her snobby boyfriend to wear such a fun outfit was beyond Rey), Finn and Poe were Spider-Men Miles Morales and Miguel O'Hara, Jannah was Starfire, and Kaydel was wearing a giant, inflatable t-rex costume.
Rolling her eyes as her colorfully dressed friends drunkenly missed shot after shot, Rey backtracked to the hallway between the kitchen and study that led to the back bedrooms. What if Ben was back there with Bazine? Were they already fucking? The thought hadn’t crossed her mind until now, but it sickened her.
In all fairness, it shouldn’t. She was the one who ended things. It wasn’t his fault if he’d found someone else. But after what she and Ben had done on the phone last week? Yeah, no, she was…
“Ben.” Suddenly spotting a talk, dark shadow near the end of the hall, Rey released a breath she wasn’t aware she was holding.
He wasn’t in a dimly lit bedroom with another woman, he was alone in the hallway leading to the guest bath, leaning against the wall with a dejected look on his face. Had Bazine rejected him? Was he thinking about her? She had to know.
Pacing down the hallway, she wrapped her hand around one thick bicep. “Ben, we need to–” 
“Bazine, I said no. I’m not–Rey?” He looked shocked to see her, but not unhappily so.
“Come with me,” she said over the music. 
He didn’t resist when she tugged him into the nearby bathroom and locked the door. She turned on the overhead light and got a better look at him. He was wearing the Stranger Things costume they had picked out together, and he looked damn good in it. The patched vest, tight jeans, and long, wavy wig made him look like a rock god.
She had intended to immediately launch into an interrogation all the way here, but now that she was alone with him again for the first time in months, all she could think about was the other night. His direction, his selflessness, his filthy words…
Without another thought, she dropped to her knees in front of him.
“Rey!” Still shocked. Good.
Looking up at him from under her lashes, she reached for his black belt. He didn’t stop her when she undid it, or when she unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, but he did stay her hand when she reached into the slit of his checkered boxers. 
“What is this?” he asked seriously, holding her fingers still when she tried to wiggle them against his hard flesh.
“I would think that’s fairly obvious.”
“Fine, then why?” he pressed. 
“Because I want to,” she said simply.
“Rey.”
“Because Hux posted a pic of you with Bazine and it made me jealous, okay?”
He shook his head as if to make sense of her. “Rey, you made it pretty clear last week that you–fuck!”
His hands went into her hair as she leaned forward to press her lips against the bulge in his shorts. “I want to suck your cock,” she said impatiently. “Are you going to let me?”
Ben cupped her cheeks, staring into her eyes, looking for something. Whatever he found there seemed to satisfy him, thankfully. “Okay.”
Smirking at her victory, she grabbed the waistband of his boxers and peeled them down over his hips, bearing his heavy sex to her eager eyes. “Yummy.” He staggered a little as she circled him with her hands, testing his hardness. “You’re bigger than I remember, heavier,” she said absently.
“Maybe because I haven't…”
He didn’t finish the sentence, but she knew what he meant. “Neither have I.”
His expression turned tender, but she wasn’t here for that. She was here to wreck him. Stroking the base of his penis in tight concentric circles, she sucked his fat head into her mouth.
“Fucking hell, Rey!” he yelped, supporting the back of her head with his massive hands. “Baby, you really don’t have to–ahhh!”
She loved hearing him groan because of her, so she sucked harder and tongued his tip like a lollipop. His thickness was a little uncomfortable after not being with him for so long, but she just relaxed her jaw as much as possible and kept going.
“I’m not going to last–it’s been 69 days,” he gasped, trying to pull back. “Rey, please, I’m going to come.” He actually sounded kind of embarrassed by how turned on he was, poor boy. “Rey!”
She giggled around his length and wiggled her eyebrows. “69 days, huh?” 
He seemed to realize what she was so amused about and choked out a laugh too. Then he was swearing and straining against her again, trying to limit his response to a few quick, shallow thrusts. But she was having none of that. She wanted him out of control.
“Baby, please slow down. I’m going to make a mess all over your pretty costume,” he groaned. “You look so hot, I don’t think I can—uh!”
She smiled at his courtesy, but continued to ignore his pleas, focusing on the motion of her hands, the push and pull of her lips, determined to drive him wild. But it didn’t take much more stimulation before his fingers tightened almost painfully in her hair and his whole body shook as he came in her mouth.
Then she barely had time to swallow before he was hauling her to her feet with his hands under her armpits, lifting her onto the counter, and forcing her thighs wide around his hips. Brown eyes so dark they were almost black, he stared at her lips for the briefest of moments before kissing the life out of her.
Their bodies surged together, their hands and tongues everywhere. It was like the first time, it was like coming home. It was…
“Oh!” Rey moaned as Ben’s cock pressed into her wet slit. If she could only get him to move slightly to the left… His lips suddenly lifted and this time she moaned in disappointment. 
Dodging her attempts to bring his face back down to hers, Ben pulled up her skirt. “What–oh, fuck.”
“Yes,” she agreed. “Your place?”
“What?”
“Do you have any condoms on you?”
“No, I–Rey, you’re not wearing underwear.” His tone suggested his brain had disconnected from the rest of his body.
“Right. So, your place?” she said again.
He lifted his eyes in wonder, or maybe it was shellshock, but he nodded.
——————
My brain goes, "Ah"
Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)
Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)
——————
Rey held his hand all the way to his black mustang and allowed him to open the door and buckle her in. It was like before, they way he took care of her. Smiling stupidly, feeling loopy and weirdly calm, the insistent buzz of her cell interrupted her train of happy thoughts.
Rose: Rey, what the heck? Did I just see you leave with your ex?.
Rey: Maybe
Rose: I thought you weren’t coming to the party?
Rey: Check your boyfriend’s insta
Ben looked sideways at her furious texting. “Everything okay?”
“Fine,” she said blithely. She didn’t care what anyone thought about her relationship–situationship?–with Ben. Not even her best friend.
Rose: I’m going to kill him. He did that on purpose!
Rey: Just realizing that lol
Rose: Look, he’s your ex but he’s also my friend and I know it’s none of my business, but do you think this is a good idea?
Rey: Yes, I know that he's my ex, but can't two people reconnect?
Rose: Are you together again then?
Rey: I only see him as a friend
“The biggest lie I ever said.”
Rose: Rey
Rey: What?
She could practically hear Rose’s annoyed sigh through the screen.
Rose: Can we at least meet for brunch tomorrow and discuss? 
Rey: Sure. Frenchie’s?
Rose: See you there at 11am
Rose: MAKE GOOD CHOICES
She turned back to Ben, amused that his tall form somehow fit into the too small muscle car. It was miraculous, really. He always took up so much space, always weighed her down in bed… “Mmm.” She especially liked it when his big body was on top of hers in bed. “Make good choices?” Rey reached over the middle console to lay her hand on his muscular thigh. “No, I don’t think I will.”
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Should probably not
I should probably, probably not
I should probably, probably not
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They stumbled into his brownstone fifteen minutes later, but Ben’s sense of urgency was seriously lacking as far as Rey was concerned; she pouted while he made her stay still long enough to lock the door and re-engage the security system. Struggling against the strong arm wrapped around her waist, she tried to turn and kiss his face.
“Still such a greedy little thing, huh?” he said fondly, deftly securing the door before ducking to haul her up over his shoulder.
“Ben!” she gasped, loving his display of strength. And the hand that creeped up her thigh and under her skirt. “That’s the spirit,” she simpered, hanging over his body like a limp scarf.
“Happy now?” he chuckled, kneading her ass.
Rey didn’t know how to answer that, so she stuck her hands into his back pockets instead. 
“Rey!” Ben danced on the spot like she’d jammed him with a hot poker. 
Releasing a peel of laughter, she squeezed his butt cheeks through his jeans. “Have you been working out more, Solo? I don’t remember these buns of steel!”
“Yeah,” he said a little sadly, “I’ve had a lot of time on my hands lately.”
“Well, it’s really paid off,” she replied lightly.
“Thanks.” He cleared his throat. “Are you, um, hungry?”
“Just for your dick,” she said boldly, wanting to sail straight past any awkwardness. “Take me to bed.”
“Fuck, Rey, you’re killing me here,” he complained, but he started moving toward his bedroom all the same.
The trip upstairs was quick and she was happy to see that his bedroom looked the same as it had two months ago when he flipped a lamp on. He even kept the numerous photos of them together, the heavy, expensive looking frames scattered across several surfaces. Clearly, he was about as over her as she was of him.
They really should talk before getting down to business, even if Rey’s natural instinct was to avoid all possibility of rejection. It was clear there was still something between them, that she hadn’t completely ruined everything. But before she could summon the courage to say anything, Ben was flipping her onto the bed and hauling her close to the edge. 
Shrugging off her crossbody purse, which only housed her phone, her keys, a slim wallet, and red lipstick, Rey hurriedly tossed it aside. The only distraction she needed tonight was Ben Solo.
Responding to her eagerness, Ben’s hands cupped the underside of her knees, stretching and bending her legs backward like the photo she had gotten off to a week ago. “Ben,” she whispered unsteadily, the position blatantly exposing her core to his needy gaze.
He looked down at her, sprawled in her green and yellow cheerleader uniform and blonde wig, already flushed and dripping. “I don’t think I can be gentle, the first time.”
“The first time?” She licked her lips. “Okay.”
“Can I fuck you in your costume?”
“Please,” she said enthusiastically, reaching for him.
But Ben captured her wrists and placed them above her head on the coverlet. “No, don’t move. I want to taste you first.”
Rey shook her head, so slick from anticipation that she was already primed to go. “I don’t need–”
“I do.” His eyes were saying incredible things, bright and imploring, wanting, loving…
Rey relaxed on the bed, clasping her fingers together where they still rested above her head. “You can do whatever you want to me, Ben.” 
She saw the exact millisecond he snapped, the switch in his brain flipping from considerate lover to voracious demon, and it was exhilarating. 
Prying her legs further apart to accommodate the width of his shoulders, Ben kneeled on the floor, pulled her close, and jammed his tongue so far inside her that stars burst behind her eyes. This was what she had been missing, what her stubbornness had denied her for weeks and weeks. The instant connection, the burning desire, the overwhelming pleasure only Ben Solo could rend from her body. 
Why had she broken up with him again? With someone who loved her to distraction? Someone who took care of her every need and allowed her to reciprocate without measure? 
Surely she wasn’t stupid enough to lose the man she loved because of a few silly hang-ups. They could work through them, maybe have a nice, long engagement to get her used to the idea. They didn't have to get married tomorrow, just the promise of commitment was enough. Somehow it all seemed so clear now when it had been murky before. 
“Ben, Ben, Ben,” she chanted as he switched angles, distracting her from serious thought.
He growled in response, nipping gently at her clitoris in time with the languid stokes of his tongue. She tried to grind her pussy into his intimate kiss, but he wouldn’t be rushed. Gripping her thighs tighter, he forced her lower body to remain still, single-minded in his pursuit of pleasure. Nobody ate pussy like Ben Solo.
“Ben! Yes! Right there!” 
He zeroed in on the spot that had her screaming, stirring her bundle of nerves until tears were streaming down her cheeks from pleasure so intense it boarded on pain. And then she was coming, gushing fluid into his waiting mouth, straining and whimpering while he held her captive.
What felt like an eternity later, she felt him shifting her body on the bed, tilting her pelvis upward to take him. “Ben?” she whispered, utterly boneless, ready and willing for anything.
“I need to be inside you. Right now.” His face was fierce, and the rocker costume he was still mostly wearing only increased her desire. 
She’d always wanted to roleplay in bed with him but had been too shy to suggest it. But now, with his pants pulled down just enough to free his pulsating need, Rey knew he would be willing to try anything she wanted. 
“I need you inside me,” she echoed, reaching for him again.
He went into her arms willingly this time, planting a knee on the bed for leverage before sinking into her warmth in one smooth motion. They both groaned as he penetrated her, the feeling of completeness bringing more tears to Rey’s eyes.
“Sweetheart,” he murmured, sipping the salty stains off her cheeks, “what’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong,” she sniffed. “Everything is incredibly right.”
Ben rewarded her words by kissing her upturned mouth in long, drugging pulls, sucking on her tongue until she was moaning harshly again. “I love the way you sound when I make love to you.” 
“Ben,” she sighed, wrapping her legs around his waist, wanting to trap him inside her body forever.
His mouth trailed down her cheek to her neck before meeting the edge of her shirt. Huffing at the barricade, he pushed the cheer top and her favorite lacy bralette up to her chin to gain access to her breasts. Ben dipped to capture a stiff nipple and her back arched of its own accord, pushing her small breast halfway into his mouth and choking him a little. 
“Bad girl,” he admonished, lightly biting her tip in playful retaliation, but she found the pressure to be oddly arousing.
“Ben! Oh–I really like that! Bite me again!” He laughed, delighted by her enthusiasm, and did as she asked. “Ah! That feels so good! Ben!”
He went to work on her then, biting and sucking at every piece of flesh he could get his lips on, tunneling his thick cock into her over and over again, reaching for an explosive completion that they could only achieve together. 
“Fuck,” he said, still pumping hard. “Rey, I forgot to put on a condom. I’m sorry, let me–”
“No! Don’t you dare!” She locked her ankles together to prevent him from pulling out.
His pace faltered, but when she squeezed her internal muscles hard around him, Ben’s hips snapped back into rapid action. “Ah! God, Rey! Are–are you sure, baby? I want to protect you.”
“I haven’t been with anyone else and neither have you!” she gasped, so close to coming again she could taste it. “I’m still on the pill, I never stopped taking it in case…” Ben did stop then and the sudden lack of friction was unbearable. “Ben, please!”
“In case what?” He held her down when she tried to lift her hips. “Tell me.”
“In case you called!” she shouted. “In case you still wanted me after–after what I did.”
He was quiet for a moment before picking up the pace again, pistoning his hips like he wanted to brand her. “Okay, but now I’m definitely going to make a mess all over your pretty costume.”
True to his word, Ben exploded inside her a minute later as she clenched hard around him, his release dripping all over her pleated skirt where it was crushed beneath her hips. As he collapsed on top of her, she made a cursory effort to say something romantic, to tease him about his desire for her, but the mind-blowing orgasm she’d just experienced left her mentally and physically depleted. 
Instead, she simply cuddled his dark head to her breast and murmured a weak, “Happy Halloween!” as his heavy body pressed hers into the mattress.
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Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, it's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight, fuck it, it's fine
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A/N: I had a great time deciding what to make all the characters be for Halloween. I love dressing up for conventions all year, so cosplay is never far from my thoughts 💃 Check back tomorrow for Part III!
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Halloween costume reference:
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asfdhgsdkjhgb · 3 years ago
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my friend bleached and dyed my hair bright elmo-lookin red, we all walked to and hung out at a gas station at 2am, watched local 58 and the film theory on it, and i may have only gotten an hour and a half of sleep max but i slept curled up in someones arms so i think its safe to say that i am the main character
#or at least my school friends group are the main characters#just me rambling again#frogs down bad#i only just got the chance to get on tumblr but i had a super fun sleepover n will be rambling about lots in these tags#yknow how ive mastered the art of the delayed gay panic? well i am experiencing it currently :D#asdfhagskdfjahgsf i also just had a great time n love my friends#we did a lot of talking and it was all just very good they are very good people to just talk with and not get tired of#one thing thats gay panic-y thats sticking in my brain is friend i like said straight out that im very similar to his boyfriend?#apparently to the point where hes apparently almost called me his bfs name on accident n im just like. m. what do i do with this info#ooof n another gay panic thing requires a bit of bg info but basically my neighborhood has a lil event thats later in the year that#im hoping to bring my school friends to if it happens this year and me n one of my neighbor friends were talking recently abt the#very real possibility of seeing my ex while out n about if it happens n she wanted to be petty n i thought itd be funny but the plan is just#if i see my ex gf whoever im with will just like grab my hand or something or act all coupley to be petty about it right? make her mad#n i brought up this plan to my school friends bc like i said i wanna bring them if it happens this year and the friend i like just#is like oh DUDE id be so extra with that id like put the arm around the waist while walking ect and at one point he said#hed pin me to a wall and if any friends are reading this feel free to bully me about it but it did take a lot to suppress that gay panic#and like i get that a lot of this sounds like ''well frog my dude that is just blatant flirting wtf'' and id like for you to note that#my school friend group is one of those groups where we kinda just flirt with each other for fun so im telling myself it doesnt mean much lol#but still i just...... mm. gay gay homosexual gay.#n also all of us are very touch starved n gay so we're always hugging n leaning on each other and its just kind of our thing#but the feeling of when we were winding down n he was laying down n i was sitting n he just loops his arms around me n we just#like... layed there n cuddled for a solid few minutes while our other friend was just kinda just sitting n doing her own thing lol#n i just- aaaaa it was so comforting and nice and just felt right being pressed against someone n safe in someones arms#and then for actual sleeping instead of like having all of us in separate areas we all just put some blankets on the floor n cuddled#so like the post says i just fell asleep in his arms n it was so cozy#god this whole post is just me being a disaster huh#i just- hm#god the whole night was just so fun though. i can already tell this is one of those memories im gonna be living in for a while#mmm i also just remembered when he layed his head in my lap n i played with his hair too :pensive-cowboy:#mm and also how i stole one of his shirts and wore it like half the night
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thesafecafe · 2 years ago
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You’ll Always Be Mine, Baby
Request: here
CW: Stalking, possessive behavior, lies, manipulation, invasion of privacy, alcohol, toxic ex-boyfriend Jungwoo, slight yandere themes, obsessive & possessive themes, black fem reader, she/her pronouns, 18+, minors dni, enjoy,
Disclaimer: I do not condone any of this behavior in real life, nor do I think any of the members of NCT would act this way in real life. It is a fictional depiction for entertainment purposes and should not be taken as a guide to the idol’s personality or actions in real life. If anyone in your life is acting like this towards you or someone you know, please contact the proper authorities as soon as possible. Stay safe!!
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Jungwoo was always good at acting. It was a special talent of his, and he was so good at it, that he was in several of his university’s productions. You’d been studying in Korea for a while now, and double majored in theatre and film production. You received a recommendation from your counselor to take an acting class as an elective, and you happened to take the last spot in the same class as Jungwoo. In a course that only took twenty five students per semester, you’d gotten very lucky. It was only natural for you to be a source of interest for inquiring minds, namely Jungwoo. He’d met you during the third week of class, although you already knew who he was. You wound up being paired with him for a class project, and your relationship blossomed from there.
Jungwoo was amazing. He got to know you during the semester, and would show you around the campus. He was curious about you, and often asked questions about your life in the country you came from before. He found you to be the most interesting person he’d encountered in a long time. He felt at ease with you, and fell for you quickly. He felt relaxed in your presence; he didn’t have to act with you. It helped that you were so sweet, and it didn’t take long for you two to start dating. Everyone knew you two were close, so it came as no surprise when people found out that you were dating.
At first, it was a happy, healthy relationship. Your boyfriend was very caring loving, and attentive, always by your side. But, as your relationship progressed to new levels, you found yourself becoming insecure about something: your age. Granted, while you were only two years apart, sometimes you could feel the age gap around some of his younger friends. You’d also been in college a bit longer than he had, and for some reason, it just bothered you. It may seem like a small issue, or silly to some, but it gnawed at you frequently, especially hanging out around his friends. 
They were really nice, welcoming you into their circle with ease. They were usually polite to you, but some often made jokes about your age gap, which at first you nor Jungwoo would bat an eye at. But slowly, as your age insecurities started to grow, the jokes seemed more and more like an attack. The final straw though, was seeing your boyfriend chat with a waitress around his age, both doing some new hand gesture that had gotten popular recently. You didn't have time to keep up with the trends, which made you feel left out, and even further separated from your man. Too far into your feelings, and fed up with feeling ostracized, you did the one thing Jungwoo never saw coming: you broke up with him. You explained to him how you felt, and that your relationship should take a break, until he “had more experience with people his age.” 
“Y/N, that’s unfair! I’ve had more than one girlfriend my age, and I’m sure the only one I want to be with is you. You’re not even that much older than me, be serious!” Jungwoo ran his hands through his hair, frustrated. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. It wasn’t playing out how he thought it would. He found your reasoning completely stupid. Were you going to let some silly insecurity throw away what you both had? “Jungwoo please, I’m serious! Just, let’s take a break for a while. Okay?” Before he could respond, you were already walking out the door, right out of his life. Jungwoo screamed, punching the wall in anger. How could you let anything, or anyone, come between you? After he’d gotten comfortable with you? He bared his heart and soul to you!  He loved you! You were his everything. You were perfect for him, his perfect little angel. You’d only dated for a year, but Jungwoo was ready to spend the rest of his life with you. You couldn’t leave him that easily. And you wouldn’t either.
For the next few weeks, you couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that you were being watched. Every time you left your apartment, you felt like someone was trying to see into the innermost parts of your being. At first you thought you were being paranoid, until you noticed something. You were seeing a lot more of your ex than usual. You’d see him in more of your classes, when you only had two together. You’d see him in the cafeteria, the corner store by your apartment, etc. What made it worse though, was the staring. He never made it a secret that he was staring you down, watching you like a hawk. Had his gaze always been so intense? And how did he always seem to know where you were? You couldn’t just blame it on coincidence, when he looked at you like you were the last meal in the world. 
You wanted to confront him, and ask what was his issue, but you couldn’t really do that with Jungwoo’s reputation on campus. Not only was he the star actor in theatre productions, but he was well known around campus for being a huge sweetheart. He was charming, polite, and respectful, and people thought he was harmless. Who would suspect, or worse, accuse everyone’s favorite golden boy of stalking his ex-girlfriend? You knew this, and so did Jungwoo. You couldn’t shake him, for weeks. A trip out meant you’d see him, and you couldn’t just not leave your apartment if you wanted to pass your classes. You thought the situation was hopeless... until you found the camera.
You still slept with the same teddy bear that Jungwoo had won for you at the fair. You squeezed the bear’s head to your chest, cuddling it until your fingers grazed a particularly hard lump. You sat up, turning on your lamp to get a better look at it. It seemed as if the bear had been cut open and poorly sewn back together in the back, not easily noticeable on the medium sized bear. Grabbing scissors from your drawer, you make quick work of the poorly sewn patchwork. Digging your fingers past the stuffing, you quickly find out exactly how your ex has been able to figure out where you’ve been. A small camera blinks red light at you, and you sit there, horrified for a moment, before anger takes you over.
“How fucking dare he?!” You were beyond pissed, immediately grabbing your phone. You messaged him, telling him to meet you the next day at the café that you both frequented. You turned off the camera, not knowing that Jungwoo was panicking on the other side. He’d been watching the whole thing on his end, and not knowing what you were planning was driving him up a wall. He doesn’t know what to do when he arrives  to the café first, fidgeting with his hands. He was nervous. You arrived shortly after him, your stony expression enough to send Jungwoo towards the edge of a panic attack. But Jungwoo has always been good at acting. He schools his face into a neutral expression, as he invites you to sit down. 
“I got your text, you said it was urgent. Is something wrong Y/n?” You scoffed, cutting right to the chase. “I know about the camera Jungwoo. In the stuffed bear, seriously?” Before he could say anything, you reached in your purse, setting the evidence before him. “Look Y/N, I can explain, alright?” Jungwoo paused waiting to see if you’d interrupt him, but you just raised your eyebrows, a cue for him to continue. “Okay, it was right before we broke up. One of my friends had installed a camera in his girlfriend’s apartment, because some thieves broke in. You remember Hae-rin?” You blinked at him, unmoved. “What does that situation have to do with this one? You installed a camera without telling me, you’ve been stalking me-”
Jungwoo shushed you, looking around the establishment. “Will you stop saying that? I didn’t stalk you! I’ve been looking out for you! There’ been a series of break ins around here for months, especially in your neighborhood, and I wanted to tell you after I did it, but we broke up!” Jungwoo frowned at you, hid voice having dropped down to a an aggressive whisper. “I did it to protect you, and I’m not stalking you! You still share your location with my phone, so I just wanted to make sure you were alright. We used to go everywhere together, so it wasn’t that different.” You looked at him in shock. You forgot that your phone was linked to his, and you felt half bad for accusing him, but there was still no good excuse to follow you around like a creep. “Look, I appreciate you wanting to look out for me, but I can’t ignore the fact that you following me around is creepy.”
Jungwoo ran a hand through his hair, nodding. “I understand Y/N, and I’m truly sorry about freaking you out, and being kind of creepy these past few weeks, it was a total invasion of privacy. I know you said we were on a break, but I’ll understand if you don’t wanna get back together after this. I truly am sorry Y/N.” Jungwoo apologized, never once breaking eye contact with you. You could sense that his words were genuine, and you sighed, hating that he could make you cave so quickly. “Look Jungwoo, I think I’ll need some more time, in light of recent events. But, I won’t say I’m totally against getting back together? But I need space, seriously Jungwoo, you have to stop following me, okay?” 
Jungwoo nodded, trying to hide his excitement So you till loved him after all. “I promise Y/N. I’ll stay out of your hair, pinky swear!” He held out his pinky, and you laughed at his accidental, yet adorable rhyming. You paid for your drinks, and said your goodbyes. As you left the café, you turned, waving to Jungwoo. He waved back, until you were almost out of sight, before turning to his phone. “Ahh, Y/N. Such a forgetful little thing.” He smiled as your location popped up, not far from him. He’d have to be more careful from now on. He had to make sure you believed him, that his promises were true, otherwise you’d slip right through his fingers. And Jungwoo couldn’t have that. No one else could have you. You’d always be his. Forever. And you believed him for now, which was enough for him. He’d always been a good actor.
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absolutewhore101 · 3 years ago
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The Produce Aisle
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Pairing: Ashton Irwin x GN!Reader
Summary: When you see your ex in a grocery store...
Warnings: friends to lovers, fluff <3
Word Count: 795
Minors DNI (no smut, just not comfortable with you interacting)!!
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“Hey Ash!”
“Hi!” He responded, just as enthusiastically. “What’s up?”
“I have to go grocery shopping later and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me? It shouldn’t take super long but I haven't seen you in a while. Plus it’s always more fun when you come with me.” You giggled.
He laughed, “I’d love to. I’ll pick you up and we can take my car, just shoot me a text when you’re ready?”
“Yeah, that sounds good. Thank you.” You told him, hanging up the phone.
You grinned to yourself, thinking about how nice it was going to be to see him again. You were lost in your own little world when you looked to your left and saw your cat sitting on the table, glaring at you. 
“What? I’ll tell him eventually.” You shrugged, going upstairs to get dressed.
About 20 minutes later, Ashton was knocking on your door, and you were tackling him in a hug.
“Hi!” You squealed into his shoulder as you held onto each other. 
He chuckled, “Hi, sweets. You ready?”
“You know it.”
The drive to the grocery store was fairly quick, the two of you catching up on the weeks you hadn’t seen each other. 
“And then we started working on this new song, and it sounds so good already, I’m excited for everyone to hear it.” He told you. 
“That’s great, Ash. I’m sure it’ll be great.” You smiled at him. 
You turned away, looking out your window and trying to hide the blush that was slowly climbing up your neck. 
Why did he have to smile like that? Couldn’t he tell what it was doing to you?
He looked back at the road, fighting the urge to reach over and grab your hand.
Just tell them how you feel! Better yet, man up and just grab their hand, that would be good enough.
Walking into the grocery store, you made a beeline for the fruit section. Ash followed quickly behind you, apologizing to any people you bumped into. 
When you got to where you wanted, you and Ash stopped, looking at the selection of the fruit. He grabbed a bag, silently holding it out for you as you began to pick up various fruits. You were trying to figure out what to do with them, when you turned and saw Ashton holding up the bag. 
You gave him a sheepish smile as you dropped them into the bag, turning back around. 
Cute, Ashton thought. 
Idiot, you thought. 
The two of you wandered around the rest of the produce section, pointing out different fruits and vegetables, talking about cooking dinner together sometime this week.
Ashton was focused on the smoothie selection when you turned around debating where to go next, spotting the man you’d hoped you’d never see again.
No. No no no no no. What was he doing here?! Oh, god, he’s looking this way! Think. Do something, Y/N! Quick!
You turned around, looked directly into Ashton’s eyes, and felt very bad about what you were about to do.
“Please forgive me for what I’m about to do.”
He didn’t have time to comprehend your words before you were grabbing a hold of his collar, yanking him down to your height, and slamming your lips against his. 
It was truly a miracle that he didn’t drop the bag, and that his heart didn’t stop.
Is this actually happening? For real? He thought to himself. 
His arms wrapped around your waist the best that they could, letting out a small groan as you gripped onto his shoulders, one hand moving to tangle into his hair. 
The kiss only lasted for about 30 seconds before you pulled away, looking at each other. The blush on either of your cheeks rivaled the tomatoes behind you. 
Your mouth opened and closed as you tried to think about what you could possibly say to explain what just happened, but instead chose to just turn around and walk away. 
You didn’t get more than a step away before Ashton grabbed a hold of your wrist, spinning you body back into his, and gently placing his lips on your again.
You let out a sigh at the change in pace, appreciating this kiss a whole lot more than the last one.
After a few seconds he pulled back, resting his forehead against yours as you both laughed, still fighting to catch your breaths. 
“I wanted to do that first,” he said, “and not in a grocery store.”
You shyly grinned up at him, “Well, it wasn’t entirely thought out. But I’m glad I did it.”
“I am too.”
“Well,” you said as you opened the door, finding your cat sitting on your couch, “I told him! Well, actually…”
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Tell me your thoughts! Thank you for reading :)
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writtendaydreamm · 3 years ago
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One Rule
Daniel had one rule he followed on race weekends. No sex.
Warnings: 18+, NSFW, smut
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It was a Grand Prix weekend and the first one y/n’s been able to attend all season. While Daniel was excited to have his girlfriend cheering him on during qualifying today, he wasn’t too thrilled about what a tease she’s been as of late. She was proving to be quite the distraction. Not exactly what he needed leading up to a big race.
It was a bit out of character for y/n. She normally tried to be as unassuming as possible during race weekends. The last thing she wanted was to jeopardize Daniel’s focus or performance. She mostly stayed out of sight and out of mind allowing him to get into the right headspace. She understood being a driver’s girlfriend required sacrifice. Fortunately for her, Daniel never asked for much. He really only had one rule during race weekends. No sex.
Now, if you know Daniel, you know he’s not really a follow-the-rules type of guy. He was more of a rule-breaker if anything. So for him to even have a no-sex rule at all, meant it was something he took seriously.
This all started very early on in his career after a horrible performance during a race he happened to have sex prior to. Needless to say, that race was one of the worst he’s ever had. Whether that incident was a fluke or if the sex really did affect his performance, only God knows. Either way, since then Daniel made it a rule to never have sex before driving. Whether that be for free practice, qualifying, or the actual race.
In accordance with his no-sex rule, the couple kept it PG these past few days sharing nothing more than some chaste kisses. It was driving Y/n up the wall. This rule never really bothered her before. But it had been so long since she and Daniel got to spend any real time together. It’s probably been around a month since they last saw each other in person. Every part of her missed him. His presence. His touch.
If she weren’t so desperate for him, she’d be impressed by his willpower. If the roles were reversed she would’ve given in by now. Y/n was not making it easy for him at all. Teasing him every chance she got. But to no avail. Dan still hasn’t budged
Y/n was just about ready to accept defeat until last night when Daniel’s resolve started to show signs of wavering. In a last-ditch effort to try and turn Daniel on enough so he’d finally fuck her, y/n wore nothing more one of than his t-shirts to bed. She was hoping for the best, but not expecting much. Daniel was already settled under the covers, headphones on, and ready for bed by the time she got there. But around a few minutes after she joined him, he got up to take a shower. Odd, since he had already taken one just before bed. Then after hearing a faint but familiar grunt coming form the bathroom, it clicked. He was taking a cold shower to get rid of his boner.
So when Y/n got dressed this morning, she didn’t choose the skimpy summer outfit she was wearing by chance. It was a calculated decision. One that would hopefully break whatever was left of Daniel’s resolve so he’ll finally toss that no-sex rule out the window.
When y/n asked him to tie her top from behind, Daniel nearly lost it right then. All he wanted to do was pepper kisses all along her neck and shoulder. How he wished he could just turn her around and pepper kisses along her breasts that were supported by nothing more than this flimsy top. But remembering his rule, he took a deep breath and pushed those thoughts aside.
Today was qualifying and Daniel was determined to earn a starting position within the top 5. He needed to be laser-focused on driving his race car at its limit today. Getting everything he can out of it. He had half a mind to lock y/n up in his car for the rest of the day the way she was acting right now. She was being a total tease the entire drive from their hotel to the circuit. Doing all the things she knew would turn him on. Like playing with his curls. Lightly massaging that spot on the nape of his neck. Running her hands over his thighs. Hiking her already short skirt up even higher.
Daniel knew exactly what she was doing. It’s not like she was being shy or discreet at all. And as much as he wanted to give her what she wanted, to rip the delicate fabric off her and take her in the back seat of his McLaren right then and there, he couldn’t shake the thought of his no-sex rule from his mind.
Swallowing hard, Daniel used every last bit of his self-control to resist her. He was so tense, his grip on the steering wheel had turned his knuckles white. Relief washed over him seeing the circuit was only a few minutes away now. He wasn’t sure how long his will would’ve lasted.
When Daniel finally parked the car, there was no denying the very visible tent that had formed in his jeans.
“Y/n,” Daniel groaned irritatedly. There were going to be cameras everywhere. There was no way he could walk out of his car like this.
She quickly feigned innocence. “What?”
He pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration. “You know what. I can’t go out on the paddock like this right now.”
“Well all you have to do is let me help you take care of that then,” y/n pouted.
“Y/n, c’mon now. You know we can’t,” Daniel reminded her. His voice lacked any actual conviction though. “I just need a second to relax.”
Daniel closed his eyes, started to take deep breaths. In and out. In and out. It seemed to work as the tightness in his jeans started to let up.
That feeling didn’t last long though as y/n used this moment to feel him up through his jeans. Daniel’s eyes shot open as he inhaled sharply at the feeling. His hand gripped her wrist tightly but made no effort to remove her hand.
Y/n’s pussy throbbed at the feeling of how hard Daniel was for her and at how miserably he was failing to contain himself.
“The last time I fucked a girlfriend before a race I had the worst race of my life y/n,” Daniel warned her weakly.
“Well obviously, your ex wasn’t a good enough fuck,” y/n countered, her hand squeezing him through his jeans just a little. “If you won’t fuck me then at let me at least suck you off baby. How about that?”
Daniel couldn’t think straight. His mind wanted one thing, and his dick wanted something else. Her suggestion seemed like a good idea. It would be like a loophole. It wasn’t technically the same kind of sex that his rule referred to. A blowjob should be fine, right?
He took a glance around the parking lot to make sure no one was there. His McLaren was tinted pretty dark, but not dark enough to conceal them completely. A little part of him hoped someone would be outside so he had a reason to resist her. But a much larger part of him was incredibly eager to feel y/n’s lips around him.
“Fuck it,” Daniel grunted under his breath, throwing caution to the wind. He released his tight grip on her wrist and instantly took her lips in his for a hungry kiss.
Y/n smiled against his lips as she started palming him through his jeans. She pulled away, shifting in her seat to better face him. Her hands eagerly began undoing his belt and jeans.
Once she got them undone and Dan helped her pull them down mid-thigh, his dick sprang up. Wasting no time, y/n began pumping him with her hands.
Dan threw his head back in pleasure. He ran a hand through her hair, fingers lightly raking her scalp. As good as this felt right now, he knew how much better her lips would feel around him. His hand on her head began pushing her face towards his dick.
Y/n scoffed at his impatience but she figured she’d teased the poor guy long enough. Rather than fighting his hand, she allowed him to guide her head closer and closer to his dick. When she got close enough, y/n dribbled a little spit onto it.
“Fucking hell, y/n,” Daniel moaned. He may have controlled his urges for her all weekend, but it wasn’t easy. He was ready to let go and reach m the release she was about to bring him to.
When y/n finally wrapped her lips around him, he bit his lip hard to hold in another moan daring to slip out. She focused on his tip, swirling her tongue around it. Her hands pumping the rest of his dick her lips had yet to run across.
When she felt satisfied with the attention had given the tip of his dick, she released him from her mouth with a pop. The cool air from the AC still running was a stark contrast to her warm, wet mouth.
Her tongue licked a stripe from the very base of his dick, up to the tip before taking him in her mouth again. She did this a couple more times before finally sinking her mouth down on as much of his dick as she could handle. He gathered her hair into a makeshift ponytail so as to keep it out of her way and to give him a better view.
Daniel could no longer hold in his moans when he felt her start hollowing out her cheeks adding extra suction as she bobbed her head.
“It feels so fucking good, baby.”
Y/n began moving her head up and down faster at the praise.
“Yeah baby, just like that. Just like that,” Daniel instructed her, his voice hoarse and husky. Both hands were now on her head helping to guide her up and down at the exact pace he needed. He was getting close.
Y/n took her mouth off him, needing some air. Daniel let out a low groan as he saw what a wreck she looked like. Her eyes were tearing, lipstick smudged, saliva all around her mouth. What a fucking sight. With his hand still on the back of her head, he brought her face to his for a wet, sloppy kiss. Y/n kept pumping his dick with her hand as their tongues battled for dominance.
Daniel pulled away first, missing the feeling of her lips on his dick. Y/n went right back to sucking on him bringing him closer to his peak.
With both hands holding her head steady, he started moving his hips up into her mouth. Daniel couldn’t control himself anymore. It started off slow and steady. But quickly, it grew rough and fast. Y/n gagged a few times as he hit the back of her throat. Her hands were on his thighs bracing herself as he chased his orgasm.
“I’m close y/n, I’m so close,” Daniel groaned.
His hips were unrelenting as he fucked her face. The rhythm he had going turned erratic. After a couple of firm thrusts, he reached his orgasm coming in her mouth. A satisfied moan left his lips as his hands let go of her head. Y/n tried to swallow as much of his load as she could before bobbing her head up and down his dick a few more times for good measure.
“That felt so fucking good y/n,” Daniel said still trying to catch his breath. He stroked her hair lovingly, trying to tame the mess he created.
Y/n just pecked him on the lips before plopping back into the passenger's seat. After fixing themselves up, the couple walked hand in hand towards the paddock. They shared one last kiss before Daniel went off to prepare and suit up for qualifying.
Out there on the track, he was surprisingly the most relaxed he’s been in a long time. He was in tune with his car and making better decisions on the fly. His lap times decreasing with every lap he finished. At the end of the last round of qualifying, Daniel managed to secure the third starting position for tomorrow. The best starting position he’s had with McLaren so far.
Maybe that no-sex rule was doing more harm than good.
When he entered his McLaren motorhome he was immediately greeted with a big hug from Y/n. “You did so amazing out there Danny.”
“Reckon it had a little something to do with that mouth of yours aye,” Daniel said cheekily, running his hand along her back.
Y/n slapped his chest playfully. “Well, I mean at least now you know that stupid rule of yours was just bull shit.”
“Nah I’m not so sure,” Daniel started, before shooting her a wink. “I think we need to test it out again tomorrow before my race. See how well I perform then.”
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chocominnie · 4 years ago
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One Last Time 01  —  Pjm. (M)
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⇢ pairing: Jimin X Reader
⇢ Genre: Idol!Jimin, Exbf!Jimin, model!reader, sad au, fluff, tons of smut, angst
⇢ Synopsis: Your idol ex boyfriend Jimin cheated on you. You two have been broken up for a while now and the media has been keeping track of you and him. You’re trying to get over him, but the things that happen inbetween makes you re-think the entire breakup, and so does Jimin…
⇢ Song : xxxxx
⇢ Word Count : 4.3k
⇢ Warnings: dominant jimin, makeout sessions, this is honestly a sad angsty au, cheating, pregnancy, unprotected and protected sex, a bunch of sex, no really a LOT of sexual themes too, I know I’m forgetting some but sorry in advance!
⇢ Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken
⇢ Authors note: This is my mini series for the summer! Get your tissues, things to take your anger out on, and sit back and watch the drama unfold. Shall we begin?
The winter’s coldness is hardly enough for you to bear. Even though it’s just the beginning, Seoul is known to just go from season to season without a fucking warning. Not only that, but the first snowfall is going to come soon. The weatherman has been talking about it non-stop for the past few days. It’s going to be a brutal one he says but he says that every year so why believe?
Turning off your alarm, you take a few minutes to collect yourself and stretch. Barely any sleep once again but that’s an everyday thing now.. without Jimin. It’s been some rough months not having his body wrapped snugly onto yours. These days you long for his touch, but completely dread at the same time for very good reasons.
Your kitten greets you with small licks on your thigh in which in return you pet her head softly with a smile.
‘‘ At least I still have you babygirl. You keep me company. “ You coo softly while grabbing your phone off the charger. Texts from your best-friend just spamming you with love and apparently she’s coming over. Great. That’s normal.  But one text catches your eye. Jeon Jungkook.
You furrow your eyebrows as your finger slides to open it after typing in your password. In relief, he’s just checking up on you as always. Rolling your eyes, you muster enough strength to actually pull yourself out of bed. The cold tiles hit your feet like icicles. You jump from from foot to foot cursing yourself for not turning on the floor heaters as you walk out the room. Clara, your kitten, follows you out purring nonchalantly with a few meows here and there.
‘’ Alright Clara I hear you. Im getting your food now.’’ You chuckle, grabbing her food from the bottom kitchen cabinet right under the sink and pour her half a cup of cat food and a whole bowl of water.
After snacking on your morning granola bar you prepare yourself for your morning routine. Shower, brush teeth, skin care, get dressed, clean. Your phone dings once more just before stripping yourself of your clothes. You don’t bother to look it’s probably just a social media notification.
Drying your hair with a towel as you get out the steaming hot shower, you head straight for the mirror. Dark circles remain under your eyes from months of barely any sleep. You sigh, and gently rub under them. Jimin is the cause of this. Why would he do this to you. Surely enough he would not like to see you like this at all. The worriedness he would have over you is huge. But he has moved on and you just have to accept it no matter how in-love you still are with him.
As you clean up around the living room, another ding from your phone occurs. A groan escapes your lips as you place the pillows back as they should be. In hopes of it just being your manager giving you some good news, you let out a sigh and plop yourself down on the grey suede couch. Three new messages. Jeon Jungkook, who has text you twice, and Ryan your bestfriend. 
‘‘ Damn it Ryan why must you consistently text me twenty four sev- “
“ Beause I need to know if you’re okay.”
You jump and drop your phone onto the hardwood floor from the voice that comes from around you.
“ Holy fucking shit you scared me! “  You whine, turning around to face your best-friend. She smiles and holds out her arms for a hug. You roll your eyes and open yours waiting for her embrace.
“ Oh i’ve missed you so so so so so so so-”
“ You just seen me yesterday..” Your voice sarcastic and bland as you let go of her. You sit on the couch first followed by Ryan sitting right next to you.
She looks good today, the navy blue coat she has on suits her very well. Although, you cannot figure out why she decided to wear leggings today. It’s going to rain a bit later but you disregard that seeing as though she’s the fashion deisgner and not you.
You. The model and seemingly ex girlfriend of one of the biggest solo idol in the world right now. Thats what they call you in the news, headlines in magazines, and real life as if you don’t have a real name and just was his acessory. Your modeling career had taken off way before dating him. The world, or Seoul to say the most, didn’t acklowledge you to that point yet. 
“ Okay but still. You know we should be roomates. It’ll be easier for me to watch over you. “
Your head turns towards her quickly shaking no, “ I don’t need to be looked over im 20 years old.”
Silence takes place for the next few seconds. You know what she’s going to say next but pray she doesn’t. Those words will just make you even more upset. It’s already enough you have that constant reminder in your head. 
You watch her fiddle with the rings on her index and pinky fingers. “ But you know… you haven’t been the same since you and Jimi-”
“ Don’t fucking say it. I don’t want to hear it.”
She sighs harshly and stands up, “ Im just worried about you Yn”
“ Don’t be. Im fine. “ That lie escaped your tongue way too easily. 
Truthfully you haven’t and won’t be fine. Everyday there is something new about that girl and Jimin on twitter. Gossip pages, twitter fanpages, and online entertainment pages just always talking about them. They did this, they did that today. Oh we caught them going to this and that restaurant. That used to be you and him.. but now everyone has forgotten about you and focused on them.
Ever since you’ve told reporters and paparazzi repeatedly that you will not be holding or going to any interview they just stopped. A few calls here and there to your manager about scheduling one but she knew you didn’t want to do them so every request is denied. Although its been a year and some change, they still seem to want your side and your opinion to weigh in on. I guess that’s what happens when you date an Idol.
“ The door.. Y/N the door somebody is at the door.” Ryan says, tapping you over and over. You shake your head interrupting your thoughts for the time being. A few more knocks come through.
Finally up onto your feet you harshly walk to the door with each step making noise. It’s to early in the morning for someone to actually be knocking at the door right now. Whoever it is better be dropping off some sort of package, or they’ll surely get a piece of your mind.
Your frail hands grab onto the doorknob and swing it open. Your eyes almost pop through your sockets. How? How did he know you were here? You certainly did not tell him your knew address.
There he stands, his tall frame looking down on you. Lips formed into a tiny pout along with his eyebrows scrunched slightly. His brown eyes forming an ungodly stare into yours with his specs on.
“ Yn! Do you know how worried I was about you? Why did you not answer my messa-”
“Jungkook how do you know where I live?” You pace your hands on your hips, raising an eyebrow at him. To your knowledge, you never gave Jungkook your new apartment address.
Jungkook swallows slowly and puts on his best innocent face on. Oh please like that would work in this moment right now. The only person who has this address is Ryan because she’s the one who helped you move. Even if you had the choice of not giving it out to Ryan you would of but you couldn’t do that to her. She would of been so upset.
Ryan’s voice blares in the background full of excitement. Here we fucking go. “Jungkook! Come in Come in.”
“ Ryan says I could come in.” He says quickly, brushing past you and removing his shoes.
You heavily sigh and slam the door shut. What is this a family reunion? On your way back to the couch you notice them laughing and giggling like two five year old children. They don’t even notice you when you sit right across from them.
You study their expressions. Their chemistry is something so strong. The way their eyes light up when they meet, the way that Jungkook smiles and scrunches his nose more often when she’s around. You miss that. You miss doing that.
“ So are you both coming along this afternoon?”
Your attention focuses back on them. Of course you weren’t paying attention once again.
Your eyes slowly meet with theirs, “ Huh? Where are we going?”
“ Kookie finally bought a house! He wants us to come tonight for chicken and beer. You’re coming right?”
A sharp pain goes through your heart. If the both you you guys go then theirs a possibility that Jimin was invited too. After all, that is his brother. If Jimin comes then he’s most likely going to bring Isabel. A recipe for disaster. Your poor heart, that most likely could not bare the sight of them infront of you, would shatter into a million pieces.
Jungkook’s expression is ready to burst into happiness or to turn into a pout awaiting for your answer. If you let him down he’ll surely be mad at you. But putting yourself before him this time would be the right thing to do right?
“ Listen Jungkook I.. don’t think I can go.” You start off, playing with your hair with your head down.
“ I’ll space you two apart.”
Your face automatically lifts itself up in shock. Somehow, that little confirmation of Jimin being there, gave you some hope. Hope for what though?
 “ Wha-what do you mean?”
Jungkook sighs heavily with his hand going up to his brown hair running it through lightly. “ I’ll make sure you two are distanced apart. You don’t want to come because of Jimin but I’ll make sure I’ll invite more people to keep you company and away from him. Okay?”
“ Please Yn. I’ll be there too.” Ryan begs, laying her head on Jungkook’s shoulder. Jungkook smiles a little, caressing her cheek with his other hand upon waiting your response.
Weird. When did they get so close?
The first thing you want to say is that you really could not go. But they already know the excuse now. You might as well just give in.
‘‘ Fine. What time tonight? “
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Skincare and makeup products are scattered everywhere on your vanity. You needed the perfect look for tonight that says ‘Yes im doing fine without you’, but in reality you’re doing worse. This is the night where you’ll actually see him. Damn it’s been a while.
After you apply your highlight you step back and take a look at yourself. Not bad at all. You smile to yourself and start cleaning up the mess of products you had  distributed across the vanity. A new text appears on you phone as soon as you gather everything up and put it back in it’s place. Grabbing your phone, it’s Ryan giving you the address to Jungkook’s new house.
You sigh and mentally prepare yourself, ‘‘ Okay Yn. You can do this. It’s just one night of conversing among people. Who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone new.”
Before heading out you grab your coat and scarf. Clara follows you all the way to the door letting out her little meows once again. You bend down to pet her head lightly with a smile. “ Clara im coming back. I’ve put food in your bowl babygirl.”
She purrs under your touch then walks away to settle herself in her bed. You take one last final look at your decent sized apartment before heading out.
The subway ride was agonizing pain for you due to it being 30 minutes long. Well, at-least you can ride the subway now. Your mind wouldn’t even of thought of that when you were with him. Everybody would have noticed you and bombard you with questions.
The outskirts of Seoul is peaceful and quite. Not many people live over here. Mostly famous actors and idols. The taxi takes a few minutes to get to the fairly clean subway station. Once you’re inside you take a good look at the driver who seems to be eyeing you in suspicion. You pull out your phone and read the words to the address exactly to him. The taxi man pulls of into the empty streets of god knows where.
All it took was a ten minute ride and then you’re there. The taxi man pulls up to a security guard booth. Just beyond the gates is more street but  by squinting your eyes you can make out just a few newly built houses.
‘‘ Who are you here to see?” The taxi driver says.
“ Jeon Jungkook.?
The driver talks to the man for a few seconds before you see the security guard pick up a phone and start dialing. The security is extremely uptight, thats good. After a few moments of speaking the security guard finally opens the gates to be let through.
As you pull up to the house you’re automatically mesmerized on how big and beautiful it is. There’s fresh bushes and some white roses growing in the front of it complementing the white modern style home. The roundabout is full of luxurious cars, in which might be all the other guests.
‘‘ 10 dollars’‘ He says. You give him the ten, thank him, and grab your purse, closing the door behind you.
Your eyes meet face to face with the expensive house. Behind you is the tire wheels backing up and running off back down the roundabout. The time on your watch reads 8:15. Only fifteen minutes late, not bad right?
With each step you take fear quivers inside of you. What if he opens the door? What if that girl opens it instead? The wind blows harsh-fully hitting your cheeks making them turn slightly colored. You raise a small, shaky fist to knock on the door. Your blood turning cold, and face turning pale already. Your anxiety already taking its place inside of your body.
The door swings open revealing Ryan smiling from ear to ear. She pulls you inside without even a greeting. You kick your shoes off in a hurry as she pulls you more and more inside. Scanning the area around you, its a nice huge place. First the both of you pass the entrance, then the chef sized kitchen, which then leads you to the spacious living room where everybody seems to be sitting.
All eyes are on you now with some familiar faces and some not. They smile and greet you one by one and you slightly bow your head with a fake smile.
‘‘ Ah Yn, nice to see you again huh.’‘ Hoseok, the smiley one says, getting up from his seat to greet you once more.
‘‘ Nice to see you to Hoseok. Is Chae-Yeon here? I’ve baked the cookies she likes.’’  You say, holding up the big tuba-wear of freshly baked cookies. Nobody can resist those.
‘‘ No she had to work sadly, but I will enjoy them for her.’‘ He chuckles, bringing the tuba-wear out of your dainty, cold hands.
A very familiar voice booms from behind you causing you to turn around. “ Yn! You actually did come!’’ Jungkook, the owner of the voice exclaims. He wipes his hands with a napkin just before pulling you into a hug.You pat his back just before letting go.
Ryan smiles and shakes her head, “ I told you she would come.’’
Only one hour and 30 minutes into the festivities and half of the people here are drunk or nearly there. You on the other hand do not drink at all. Staying sober throughout this whole party is a must. Who knows what would happen if you start drinking and saying things.Ryan seems to be doing good with Jungkook who’s laying on the floor laughing and cracking jokes with her head laying on his stomach giggling along with him. The others have casually invited themselves into the guest game-room to play some pool.
You just sit there on the couch, munching on a cookie and smiling and laughing here and there at one of Seokjin and Jungkook’s back-to-back jokes that seem to never leave the air.
Only for a knock on the door to interrupt  their flow of jokes.
‘‘ I got it I got it.” Seokjin stammers, placing a beer bottle down and stumbling towards the door. You freeze, face turning pale once more. It’s them. It could be them. Your teeth find their way to your lips and you begin to chew on it excessively.
Ryan notices it and automatically gets up from Jungkook, ‘‘ Come Yn, lets go see if the game of pool is interesting.’‘
You nod your head slightly as you get up from the couch. What are you worrying for? You look extravagant tonight. No need to worry yourself.
Just before taking your first few steps you stop, that voice. That oh so familiar voice begins to inch closer and closer. The famous laugh that he always tries to stifle by putting his hand over his mouth, that you’ve always thought was so fucking cute, fills the air.
You don’t know what got over you, but you sit back down dragging Ryan down with you. “ Yn? What are you doing I thought you wanted to avoid him.’’
‘’ No it’s okay. Im going to be fine.’‘ You say, awaiting upon his arrival into the room.
The footsteps are haunting you with each step they take.
one..two..three..four..five..si-
‘‘ Everyone, Isabel and Jimin are here.’‘ Seokjin stammers, smiling wide clearly drunk from all the beer consumed.
Your eyes go directly towards his. The pit of your stomach flutters with nervousness as you hold the long stare with him. His facial expression shocked but not showing it at all. His partner, who’s arm is linked with his, smiles brightly at everyone bowing her head slightly to them including you.
‘‘ Sorry we are late. Jimin didn’t want to come out of his home studio but I’ve made him come along with me.’‘ Her voice gentle and soft.
‘‘ Yn I forgot let me show you my new painting i have received.” Jungkook says quickly, trying to escape you from the awkwardness.You can bare it though its not as bad as you thought.
‘‘ Maybe later Kookie. I’m going to grab some juice.”  You say, getting up from your spot. You brush past Jimin lightly with Ryan tailing along with you.
The spacious kitchen was perfect for you to escape for just a moment. Silence is golden. Ryan sighs, pouring you and her a glass of juice. Nothing is to be said yet. But you know she really wants to have her input.
Raising the glass to your lips, you take a sip letting the tanginess run across your tongue and down your throat. ‘’ Say it Ryan.’’
She puts her cup down and looks at you with your eyebrows furrowed, ‘’ You aren’t fine. Please just avoid them for the night.’’
You knew it was coming but you have to face the fact that they area couple anyways so why avoid it? Maybe your mind will finally accept it to see it in person.
‘‘ I have to face it one way or another so why not now?’‘
She shakes her head in disapproval, finishing the rest of her juice. “ No you don’t. You’re making yourself suffer and I don’t like it.’’
‘‘ Yn.. did you make these cookies?’‘ A voice says behind you. Ryan’s eyes go wide and then looks at you signaling for you to not turn around. But you do it anyways.
Isabel. How dare she call you by a pet name? You don’t even know her like that and she’s doing this. Anger wants to get the best of you but you remain humble and calm.
‘‘ Yes. Is there a problem though? Are they not good?’‘ You say, putting on your best innocent act.
She smiles as she moves a piece of hair of her perfectly framed face, ‘’ No they are great! I was wondering if i can have the recipe.. for Jimin’s purpose of course.’’
You breathe through your nostrils with your eyes closed. She knows what she’s doing. She likes seeing you suffer huh? ‘’ You can follow any recipe online. I just add almond extract and substitute white sugar for brown.’’
Ryan shakes her head slightly while sticking her cup into the sink. ‘’ I’m going to be back I have to use the restroom.’’
Once she leaves Isabel’s smile drops.’’ Almond? Im- Im allergic!” She says, semi yelling at you. You’re shocked more or so at the sudden outburst that you can’t speak. You had zero knowledge of her being allergic, it’s an accident for sure.
 “You did this on purpose!’’ She says, tears filling her eyes as she goes into a coughing fit.
Shit. You didn’t know if anyone was allergic to nuts here but you had put it in anyways because that was the secret ingredient
‘’ I- I didn’t know im sorry is there anything I can do?’’ You say, guilt taking over you while you rush to her side patting her back. 
‘‘ Get off of me! You did this on purpose! You never liked me anyways. Jimin! Jimin!‘ She scream’s, coughing and wheezing making her face red.
Multiple footsteps rush into the kitchen. You don’t know what to do at this point so you just back away and let whoever take over. All the commotion going on and yelling is starting to give you a slight headache. All of the boys surround her, bombarding with questions and asking each other what to do. 
‘‘ What’s all the yelling about? What happened! “ Jungkook exclaims rushing towards her hunched over body.
‘‘ What’s going on? “ That voice that haunts you everynight finally comes inside the kitchen. When he see’s Isabel he automatically rushes towards her side. It pains you to see him rush to another woman’s body. But that figure is no longer yours so he has every right to do that.
‘‘ She-She put almond in the cookies on purpose! She’s trying to–to-’‘ She manages to wheeze out before another coughing fit.
Jimin’s eyes meet yours full of rage but then taken over by concern. He knows your hurt. Still hurt from the past and from this very situation now. You don’t manage to keep eye contact, so the floor is your eyes’ bestfriend right now.
‘‘ Yn. is this true? Why would you do that?”  He says, eyes never leaving yours and voice soft.
You shake your head quickly, “ I didn’t know she was allergic. I always put almond extract an-’’
“ You knew better than to put any type or form of nut in a dish when bringing it to ones house. You never know if someone has an allergy to it.’‘ Jungkook scolds you, eyes furrowed in shame.
‘‘ Don’t blame her. She didn’t fucking know.” Ryan’s voice enters the room in madness. She comes to your side with her arms crossed. Your own personal savior. Without her, you’d still be feeling guilty and taking the blame.
‘‘ Besides, you knew better than to invite him if you knew he was going to bring the girl he cheated on her with.. right?’‘ She says, cocking her head to the side as her attitude takes over.
The room is silent again. Good girl Ryan. 
Isabel lifts her head in disbelief along with Jimin. “ Listen that’s beside the point. Just don’t do it again.” Jimin says, focusing his attention back on Isabel. He reaches into her purse to grab her Epi-pen.
His scolding is enough to send your eyes into tears. You shouldn’t of agreed to come. This is a disaster. You take the tuba-wear of cookies from the counter on your way out of the kitchen and dispose of them. Your vision is blurry and you don’t know where your going but you just need some air. You make lefts and rights down long and short hallways till you reach a room that has a balcony.
You slip on who-ever’s house slippers and open the sliding door revealing the winter’s cold harsh air. You lean on the railing and close your eyes breathe in and out heavily.
Wiping the tears away, You open our eyes and look straight ahead. The whole city is lit up such a beautiful view for a sad moment. The sad moment is cut short by the sliding door opening and closing. You don’t bother to turn around it’s probably just Ryan checking on you again. When are people going to stop doing that?
“ Yn.”
Thats the last voice you wanted to hear.
‘‘ Are you happy? Happy for scolding me infront of everybody.”  You sniffle, wiping away your leaking nose.
You hear some rustling before something is placed on your shoulders. You look down at the material and shrug it off of you.
‘‘ Give it to your girlfriend.”
‘‘ I can’t let you be cold. Put it back on.’‘ He sighs, picking it back up and coming closer to you. You both stand side by side. Jimin puts his jacket around you once more and before you could re-do your action just before, he speaks.
‘‘ Shrug it off again and I’ll scold you. Do you understand?’‘ He says firmly.
You don’t bother to speak. Silence is golden.
‘‘ Listen.. i know you still aren’t over the fact that we are through but-”
‘‘ Shut up. I don’t want to hear it. Please go tend to your dying girlfriend.’‘ You say, sarcastically.
He huffs, “ She’s resting right now. She wouldn’t have to be if you wouldn’t of put-’’
You turn towards him slowly and meet his eyes daring for him to finish the rest of his sentence. ‘’ Don’t you fucking dare Park Jimin.’’
‘‘ Honorifics.’‘ He says, slightly looking down at you due to the height difference.
‘‘ You’re right Jimin-ssi.’‘
Jimin’s expression is taken a-back. You knew that one honorific word would hurt him.
‘‘ If we are done speaking I will take my leave now.” You say, eyes never leaving his as you take off his jacket and toss it to him, leaving him outside in the cold
This night was one of your worst mistakes. You thought you could handle it, but couldn’t. So maybe Ryan and Jungkook were right. Maybe you can’t handle it at all..
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maseshine · 3 years ago
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𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: mason fakes a relationship with his "enemy" to make his ex jealous, but ends up realizing he has feelings for you.
𝐭𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐜𝐬: fake relationship, enemies for lovers, vacation trip
𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: swearing, alcohol consumption, party
𝐚/𝐧: i'm open to requests! i write using a dash and my first language is not English!
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𝗳𝗮𝗸𝗲, part¹ || mason mount
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You looked at Mason with your most incredulous expression on your face. You certainly understood the wrong words, it was not possible that they were right and true.  
━  How much alcohol did you drink tonight, Mount? This is certainly affecting the little intelligence you possess. ━ His words were joking, making a grimace appear on the player’s face.  
━  I’m completely sober, Y/N. And there’s nothing wrong with my intelligence, not everyone needs to attend an exclusive university to be smart! ━  The pin in your university didn’t go unnoticed by Mason’s voice.  
━  Some of us are not just a pretty face and a nice little body, I can’t help it if I was born with all this and with a lot of intelligence. Blame my parents, Mount. ━ He spoke as he passed by and walked towards his kitchen.  
Mason followed his body with his eyes, but quickly shook his head and walked behind you to continue the conversation you were having, entering the kitchen his attention was drawn to his figure sitting in the cool and eating candy on the spoon.  
━  You eat very sweet, knew. It will still hurt your health in the future. ━ You rolled your eyes at Mason’s words, that bullshit.  
━  Minus Mount. You’re just an athlete, not my nutritionist. And eating candy at the moment is what makes me not jump on you for your own stupid idea.  
━  Come on, you’re just being a bitch about it, it’s not stupid if even our friends already believe it! ━ You put an offended look on your face when you heard the word bitch, even if it was true.  
━  I always wondered if our friends had any real problems, so it just confirms everything. How is it possible for them to believe that you and I are hiding from them? We can’t stand each other, let alone that skinny girls aren’t my type. ━ A wicked smile adorned her chocolate-stained lips. 
━  Hey! ━ He shouted, outraged. ━ I have a lean but muscular build. I’m not skinny, Y/N. Kai is thinner than me, and we don’t see you calling him skinny.  
━  I like him, not you! The difference starts right there! But seriously. Your idea won’t work, Mason. We’ll never really be able to pretend that we’re attracted to each other and that we like each other. It just won’t happen.  
━  All of our friends keep saying that we scream repressed sexual tension. So, it sure won’t be hard to fool them all! Not to mention that Daphne was always jealous of you while we were dating. ━ Mason told you.  
Which wasn’t a lie, during the seven months you spent with your ex-girlfriend he had a lot of questions about whom you really meant to him, in her mind the two of you already had something, and it still affected them, you were often the reason Mason and Daphne had fights, even though you had no idea about it.  
━  And why the hell would she be jealous of me? I never did anything to make her feel like this. ━ You asked confused.  
━  You never heard it from me, but Daphne was always a little insecure and in her head you are very beautiful and desirable, many times that we went out without you boys talked about how you were missed and how beautiful you would be if you were gone, she always clung to it a lot, you were also always close to everyone, and she saw how boys weren’t like that with her, so she really was very jealous of you.  
You just looked at Mason without knowing what to say, it never crossed your mind that Daphne felt that way about you. Mason’s ex-girlfriend was simply gorgeous, she was the first girl different from the girl pattern that Mason dated, you never got close to her, and now that you knew the reason it just shocked you.  
Of course, you were aware that you were beautiful, hearing compliments about your appearance was normal enough for you, but it never occurred to you that it might affect other girls. Especially someone like Daphne, who could have anyone she wanted. It was really a surprise.  
━  Wow, I really didn’t expect it. She’s just gorgeous! Not to mention that nothing would ever happen between us. ━ You talked.  
━  I know. But apparently that’s not how your head works, so I never really understood it, it seemed like the only person she was jealous of was you, not fans or other women, it was always you were quoting when we were fighting. ━ Mason explained as he leaned against the arch of the entrance to the kitchen.  
━  But back to your idea. Why do you want to fake a relationship with me to make your ex jealous? Didn’t she cheat on you? ━ He asked, his attention turned to picking that licked to clean the chocolate.  
━  Yes. You always make a point of reminding me of that! You know we’re going to Saint-Tropez on holiday, Lauren met with Daphne at the mall, and she invited herself to go along, her and the guy she cheated with. ━ You held back the laughter by observing the desperation in Mason’s eyes, having already understood why she wanted to fake a relationship.  
━  So in your brilliant mind, the best thing to do is fake date a girl you can’t even stand and fight all the time. I really don’t see anything going wrong. ━ Your words came out loaded with irony. ━ Why don’t you call one of your dates, Mount? One of them would be very happy to be your girlfriend.  
━  Nah, that would just fuel a relationship I don’t want to feed, which wouldn’t happen to you! I know we fight a lot, but if we try, I know we can spend a few days pretending to like each other. It’s not going to be that hard, look at me. ━ He spoke with open arms. ━ I am wonderful.  
A slight laugh escaped his lips by Mason’s nonsense. Self-esteem was something left over for the Blues' number 19. Which sometimes made him have a little higher ego. Even if he could have.  
━  You just forgot something. ━  You said, jumping off the counter and walking towards the fridge and then straight to the sink.  
━  What? ━ Mason asked.  
━  I’m not going with you guys to the trip. I’m on holiday from college, but I need to get some work done, not to mention that I have some photo shoots and some fall exactly the week you travel.  
━  No. What’s Y/N. You girls spent months talking about this group trip, and now you’re telling me you’re not going? ━ Mason seemed really exasperated. ━ You can take his books and study for a few hours. On the photos, try to do before the trip.  
━  That’s not how it works, Mount. Even if I manage to change, I’ll still have to pay a small fine for the change. ━ You explained.  
━  I pay, no problem. Just send me the amount I pay!  
You looked at Mason surprised, you didn’t really believe he was that desperate to make your ex jealous. Okay, that the price of the fine wouldn’t even tickle his stuffed bank account, but you didn’t expect to see him so willing that you could help him.  
━  You honestly want to make this stupid idea work, don’t you? ━ A sigh came out of your lips, Mason wouldn’t give up, I don’t know how to drive you crazy with the way.  
━  I don’t want to play the role of the betrayed ex who hasn’t yet moved on! I have pride and need to preserve what’s left of him. Will you help? ━ The fake pout he was making you look away from him, you didn’t have to find him cute.  
━  All right. But, let’s work on some rules, I don’t want your hands running through my body, or you're thinking you can do whatever you think is right. It doesn’t work like that. ━ His serious physiognomy left no time for jokes. 
━  I wouldn’t dream of it.  
The smile on Mason’s face only made it clear to you that he had even more plans in his perverse mind. Whatever it was you were getting into.
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alreadyblondenow · 4 years ago
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Each other’s replacements
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▸ Na Jaemin x female!reader ▸ Inspired by the anime Scum’s Wish ▸ High school au, SMUUUUT, fluff and angst
Summary: Two broken hearts met unexpectedly and agreed to use each other so you can both move on from your exes. Your hearts belong to each other already, you’re just waiting for love to take place and make everything right. But will you both still choose each other in the future? Word count: 6,988k
Warnings: Using each other to forget your exes, ex Lee Jeno, kind of fuck buddies but no? Fingering, mentions of fingering, handjob, blowjob, and watching each other masturbate, mentions of taking nude photos after sex, Jaemin taking a picture of your naked body after sex (with consent ofc), uproctected sex, mentions of rough sex, making out, swearing, mentions of breakup, actual breakup
A/N: I hope you enjoy this Jaemin fic. I tried writing it as realistic as possible because I think Scum’s Wish is a very mature and realistic anime, I mean shit like that happens in real life. And I think Mugi is so fucking handsome. The ending of the series sux btw HAHAA bc I wanted them to end up together so heres my version of it. 
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It all happened so fast but the heartbreak stayed and the process of healing is very slow.
Three months have passed already when your ex-boyfriend Jeno broke up with you on a nice afternoon after school. The reason? Well, let’s just say he fell out of love. And that’s what made it worst because you remember that all you ever did was love him and please him.
Every day, you go to school, attend class, study hard but you always looked so gloomy. And whenever Jeno cross paths with you in the hallways, he knew he hurt you badly and that you’re not your normal self anymore. The cheerful and excited girl he fell in love with was gone and it’s all because of him. He can only wish that someone will bring you back and make you happy again.
“I’ll help you with that,” a cold manly voice interrupted you and your thoughts while you were having a hard time throwing the trash. He’s not part of your class, he’s one of Jeno’s classmates but you two were never introduced to each other.
You watch him throw the heavy trash for you and hoping that he will hand the bin afterward but he didn’t. “Lead the way, it’s dirty I’ll hold it for you” he insists, so you do as you’re told, showed him the way so you can finish this day as soon as possible.
Jaemin knew everything. It’s a small school and students usually gossip too much whenever a couple breaks up, especially after being together for so long. He knew who broke your heart, he also knew that you used to smile and be cheerful all the time because he has seen you in places and he knew you're capable of automatically lighting up the place whenever you’re around. But now… all he can see is a broken-hearted girl.
“Here,” you hand him a tissue and your hand sanitizer as a thank you for not letting your hands get dirty. He accepted it and gave you a small smile, obviously, he’s not shy and he was looking directly at you while his hands move. To be honest, you have no reason to be shy with each other, and honestly, you just don’t care anymore you just want to end this day. But Jaemin being the bold man that he is, bravely loosen up the ribbon of your school uniform and undid a few buttons from your school blouse. It was a common thing for students to do that after school as a sign that they're ready to head home and end their day. Jeno used to do it for you, and you didn’t expect Jaemin would do it. Despite the fact that you only met properly today.
You don’t know what happened but your heart was racing the moment he’s done adjust it and you just stare at his crooked tie and figured you may as well loosen it up for him too and return the favor. A bold move that Jaemin did not expect from a girl because he’s used to being with girls who become shy and all flustered after he makes a move.
But you, you’re different.
And that’s when Jaemin realized that you are a perfect match for him.
Word is Na Jaemin is pretty popular with girls. Besides Lee Jeno your ex, Na Jaemin is the second most handsome guy in school. Not only that he’s handsome, but you also know that he is passionate when it comes to photography, he’s naturally smart, not that nice, quiet but cocky, cold but can give anyone the right amount of attention if he wants to. But in your case, you have his full attention.
That afternoon, for the first time in three months, you did not go home alone, someone walked with you and watched you go inside your house.
The same cold but needed interaction with Jaemin happened over and over again until people started to gossip and think that you’re together. But it was nothing like that and you stopped caring about rumors a long time ago. Jaemin is nothing like Jeno, but he’s a gentleman, he’s straightforward but most of the time quiet. And most of the time you share silence not stories and you both love it that way.
You were different people but before you knew it, you were spending more time with each other.
On Valentine's day, you don’t know what came to his mind and brought you a bouquet of roses and gave it to you secretly. You were genuinely happy of course, but you just couldn’t smile that big and show him more. Seeing him from afar with a dozen roses and a smirk, with his black sling bag he uses for school that makes him so attractive… is enough to call your Valentine's day a memorable day.
“You’re special too,” he said and hands you the bouquet. “Ready to go home? Sorry I couldn’t help you with trash today, I picked these up right after school and rushed back-“
“Thank you” you cut him off with a friendly kiss on the cheek that made him blush and shy for the first time.
With a bouquet of roses on your left arm and the trash bin on your right hand, you came back to your classroom to get your stuff and put the bin back. You cleaned your hands and admire the roses as the afternoon sunlight hits them perfectly and finally come out again to meet Jaemin. Only to find him eavesdropping on the classroom near yours.
“What-“
“Shh” he cut you off with a ‘shh’ gesture and made you look at the half-closed door and made you listen to their conversation as well.
Jeno I like you too.
Were words that immediately ruined your day that Jaemin perfected. But this is not about you. Because when you turned your back and looked at the man beside you, you saw yourself. The pain that you’ve been feeling for months now, you saw it in Jaemin’s eyes too. Now you understand that you’re just two broken people who are still in pain. And you have no idea that he has been hurting too.
Of course, seeing Jeno with another girl hurt you badly, but seeing Jaemin get teary-eyed bothered you more. So you reached for his hand and whispered, ‘it’s okay’ even though it’s not, and walked away silently with him to continue your day together.
“Do you think they’re just doing this because people are gossiping about us?” you asked while you watch him stare at his coffee blankly. You’ve never seen him like this even though he’s always quiet and cold.
“N-no. I know my ex, uhm… she wouldn’t use anyone. Is Jeno-“
“No. I know him too. And I know that he’s happy when he found out about us,”
“So it’s true then. Their feelings for each other” he said and went back to staring at his coffee blankly.
You pursed your lips and let out a deep sigh. Allowing yourself to be hurt again by hearing the truth that you have been completely replaced in Jeno’s heart. There was silence. Then you decided to admire the flowers that Jaemin gave to you and feel the soft petals on your fingertips. This day could have been a turning page for the both of you, but now you’re both very sure that you’re not yet ready to open your hearts for somebody else.
“Red roses mean love and romance,” you said as you continue to admire the roses that he gave which made him smile a little. “Do you like me?” and just like that, you gave him the question that you’ve been meaning to ask for the past few months.
“I do” he answered without hesitating, which gave you a shock actually. “Do you?” he returned the question.
“I don’t,” you said the truth because you can’t repay him with lies. No. You can’t do that to Jaemin, “but you’ve become special to me. And I don’t want to lose you too,” Honestly you thought being honest to him will make him feel even more horrible but it didn’t. In fact, it brought the unique handsome smile you love seeing on his face.  
“Though, it’s not right that we are using each other to forget our exes-“ you added but he cut you off immediately.
“But I need you, and honestly I’ve been very happy these past few weeks because of you” he confessed. And you wish that you could tell him the same thing but you can’t because it’s still Jeno. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m not begging you to stay. You’re an adult and I have nothing against your decisions. But I really hope we could go back to normal and be closer now that we know what each other really feels. I will date you properly when the right time comes… Just not now that we're both still confused and not sure”  
Everything did not make sense of course, and the right thing to do is refuse. But the past few weeks were actually good. Not great but still Jaemin was a huge change. So you nod your head and agreed that you should continue what you’re doing but promised each other that if either one of you feels pressured already, then you should stop.
As you continue seeing Jaemin and trying to move on from Jeno, you became comfortable with each other as days go by to the point that neither one of you cares if someone mentions that you look great together even though your relationship is not true.
It was a never-ending try to give each other the chance and love that you deserve. But at the same time, it was a never-ending process of healing from your exes, a never-ending heartbreak whenever you two hear something good about their relationship. And to be honest you’re both happy that you’re not facing this heartbreak alone.
You’re thankful for each other because you have each other’s backs. But in a different way.
Jaemin is thankful for you because he can hold your hand, hug you tightly from behind then whisper sweet words, and kiss your neck, whenever he wants to, and whenever he misses skinship with his ex.
You on the other hand, is thankful too because he does these various things to you and you can just close your eyes and he lets you imagine that he’s Jeno. Like now. You were just cuddling and watching the rain from his window when suddenly his hand roamed under your skirt while he was listening to you talk, and his cold fingers played on the hem of your panties. Teasing your pussy and moving his fingers up and down your wet cover slit.
“How does Jeno touch you? Is gentle? Rough?” He asks in the sexiest tone he ever used and started kissing your neck. You had a hard time answering his question because of what he’s doing, but your mind lurks on the memories you had with Jeno in his room.
You remember how Jeno fingered you in his bed, how two fingers always feel good and that’s how you like it, you remember that while his fingers are deep inside you, he is busy kissing your body. Planting soft kisses on your chest and on your boobs, kissing your nipples and making them sensitive and he puts them in his mouth and sucks it good until it's both swollen.
This is the first time Jaemin had touched you down there. And you swear, you don’t want him to stop and you just want to remove your panties and spread your legs for him.
“Jaem-“ you moaned out an airy tone. Calling his name with your eyes closed and parted lips. Feeling his fingers go up and down your wet slit still.
“Do you mean Jeno?” Jaemin asks. But truth be told he doesn’t mind you moaning his name instead on your first time going too far. And finally, he removed your panties and made you spread your legs for him which you gladly did. Putting two fingers slowly while he’s watching you make the sexiest faces that just simply makes him hard.
Jaemin never rushed, he took his sweet time with your body. Pushing you on the edge over and over again but you don’t know why you haven’t cum yet. His tongue and fingers together were somewhat calming and just made you breathe in and out deeply, which is relaxing while you spread your legs even more.
And when you finally came, it was a nice warm feeling all over your body. Like you just got out of the shower, wet and relaxed. Though you feel so tired, weak and sleepy... Jeno was never like this but your imagination was a big help that you moaned Jeno’s name a couple of times and that made Jaemin felt so accomplished.
“How about you? Don’t you want to cum?” you asked Jaemin while you watch him help you wear your panties again, kissing your thighs after.
“Maybe later,” he said, not admitting that he came earlier too, ruining his boxers briefs.
That day you did more than touching each other’s private parts but actually giving each other oral sex for the first time. His sheets were so ruined because he came so hard when you gave him a blowjob, a handjob and when he jerked himself in front of you while he watches you finger yourself. In return, he made you cum more than three times using his fingers and tongue. And you came home with a weak body and weak legs that you flopped straight in your bed and slept with a smile.
But there are times that it’s just the two of you. Just Jaemin and Y/n, no exes involved. Where you can be free being yourselves whenever you’re alone together. Like him snapping pictures of you out of nowhere while you’re busy kissing him, or whenever you just finished having sex and you’re both too lazy to get dressed again and he will suddenly capture amazing photos of you while you’re still naked in his bed, wearing nothing but the smile he gave you because of the sex.
“Hmm. Jaemin, these are beautiful. Can I have this one? I love seeing your works, it’s like I’m seeing myself through your eyes”
Little did you know that that simple compliment from you made him blush hard and his heart jump. It’s not every day he gets to be himself, but lately, he has been feeling so inspired with his craft and he had a good guess it’s because of you.
“You can keep this too, it’s one of my favorites,” he said and handed you a picture of you kissing him while he smiles so big and so handsome with both of your eyes closed. It’s a perfect moment, a moment that Jaemin captured in the middle of him being so happy that you’re showering him with kisses.
Jaemin is sweet and quiet as usual and he showers you with love and affection every day in his own way. He’s not the normal guy who will praise you and tell you that you’re beautiful, he will just simply look at you like you’re his favorite person in the world. Which you are now. He doesn’t talk too much because one, that’s his personality already and two, he simply loves listening to you even though you don’t talk too much yourself.
He is the complete opposite of Jeno, and that’s why he became special to you.
“Yesterday, me and my mom were at the mall and I saw them. Just from afar and they were about to enter the movies and… you know, seeing them together hurt” he says while kicking stones on your way to your house.
You can only imagine the pain he felt when he saw them spending time together, and now it’s your time to get hurt because Jeno used to bring you to the movies. Then it gave you an idea.
“Do you want to go to the movies tomorrow? My treat,” you said. Nervous and shy you slowly met eyes and stopped walking when you finally arrived in front of your house.
“Did you just realized that I haven’t taken you out on a date? Because I feel bad, I just realized it now” he rambles.
“No no,” you chuckled, “I simply wanted to go to the movies with you. So tomorrow?” you were slowly walking away from him with a small smile on your face. If Jaemin was being honest, he wanted to be with you just a little bit longer. But parting will make your meeting even sweeter the next day.
On the next day, you remember clearly that you said ‘my treat’ yesterday. But the whole day that you’re together he never let you pay for anything, not even a bottle of water. You feel at ease even though it’s your first date and it’s your first time seeing each other in casual clothes and not in your uniforms, or wearing nothing at all. He looked handsome in his get up, he knows how to dress and he sure does look like the warm person you know.
“Do you like anything else?” he whispered beside you while you two wait for the movie to start and watch people enter.
“No I’m just a little chilly. But I’m fine, keep your jacket,” you stopped him before he removes his jacket, you know he will. So instead of lending you his jacket, he kept you close and wrapped an arm around you.
“This is nice, right?” he whispered back and rested his head on yours.
During the movie, Jaemin did not try any funny business. Though you were waiting for it and of course you will give him your consent. If this was Jeno, by this time you’re whimpering and cumming on his fingers by now. But you’re with Jaemin right now, and Jaemin did nothing but hold your hand, keep you close and keep you warm. And the thing that he did that made your heart race the most, was when he tightens his embrace when the couple kissed in the movie, exchanged ‘i love yous’ and he pulled you closer to him. “We’ll get there,” he whispered, “Just remember that I’m the one here and not Jeno” and you nod because you agree to him.  
Not long after your first date, you and Jaemin shared a kiss under a lamppost just before you enter your house. It was not your first kiss of course. But it was the first time that you two felt that there we're no lust involved. It was a genuine kiss. A kiss that told you ‘I’m glad you chose to stay in this stupid relationship we have’ not to mention his soft lips were addicting and he was gentle the whole time. He wasn’t rushing you, he wasn’t hungry for you. But you can feel his long to finally move on and give his love wholly to you.
“Is it okay if I kiss you like that every day from now on?” he asked softly, forehead to forehead and just enjoying the cold breeze of the evening and the quietness of the street.
It’s Jaemin, not Jeno. You remind yourself over and over again.
“Yes” you nod and wrapped your arms around his neck, “Kiss me again” you requested. And so Jaemin did, even deeper but this time he took your breath away during the kiss.
The moment you closed the door and Jaemin watched you go inside your house safely, you burst into tears because you can’t help but see Jeno in your head and imagine that it’s Jeno kissing you not Jaemin. Even though it felt nothing like Jeno’s kisses, even though you smell Jaemin’s unique cologne, still it’s Jeno whom you see in your head and it’s Jeno whom you really wanted to kiss.
Days passed by and you try a little harder to show him affection, you try a little harder to be with Jaemin and not think about your ex, you try saying Jaemin’s name more often. Calling him with a smile, surprising him with back hugs, smiling with him more. Honestly, you just want to help yourself with forgetting Jeno completely because it’s exhausting already.
Today is the school’s fair and you’ve been with your friends the whole day laughing and discussing boys over snacks, sex and other stuff. And while you and your friends have been participating in a lot of games today, Jaemin can’t stop taking pictures of you from afar and watch your pretty smile. The smile he’s been seeing a lot lately and he hopes that it’s because of him.
‘Hey beautiful, I like your smile’
You received a text from him, you look around where he is and you found him behind you. Smiling so handsomely with his camera slung on his shoulder. Your friends teased you and Jaemin for being all flirty with your glances, you have never been shy around him but now there are butterflies in your stomach. Jaemin then shamelessly showed your friends how he treats you nicely, he can’t kiss you inside the school grounds so he winked at you instead and smiled.
It definitely made everyone around you jealous. Especially when Jaemin started taking your pictures, something no one was ever seen Jaemin do.
At the end of the day, you and Jaemin walk hand in hand and went to his house to cuddle and flirt more in his bed. Hands intertwined, legs tangled, bodies closer and just listening to each other talk about the most random things.
That’s right, you and Jaemin now talk. No more comfortable silence, no more quiet walks, you’ve come so far to reach this level of comfort. And when you’re both comfortable in each other’s arms like this, you both never shut up about the things you want to share with each other. Like the comfortable silence was gone with your awkward and shy phase too.
You asked him how he used to love his ex and he never shuts up about it, and it is as if he was describing how he’s treating you but when it comes to you everything was better. Like how he used to not care about Valentines for his ex but for you he went to different kinds of flower shop just so he can find the best quality of red roses. He used to hate walking with his ex because it’s making him sweat like crazy, but when it comes to you, seeing and watching you go inside your home safely was satisfying.
“Jaemin what are we? Are we friends with benefits now? Or just friends?” you dropped the question out of nowhere while you two lie in your bed, and you play with his long and perfect eyelashes.
“Hmm. No, fuck buddies avoid feelings while we... well, we try to develop our feelings. Let’s say we're two waiting hearts, were not yet in love with each other but… we belong to each other already. How’s that sound?”
“Waiting hearts. Hmm. I like it. Did you made that up?” you giggle and ran your fingertips on his very soft lips, which made him catch your hand and kiss it before he opens his beautiful eyes again.
“Yeah” he says, “But everything I said was true. Moving on is a bitch and I just can’t wait to love you right,”
And those words were just right. Perfect actually, that it made you kiss him sweetly and sincerely. And with your lips and the way you kiss, Jaemin felt that you made a promise to him. Like you’re not going to make him wait for nothing. And because of that he deepens the kiss and went on top of you, placing his body in between your legs, kissing your body nonstop and whispering sweet things to you.
“When we're finally and officially together, I won’t hurt you as Jeno did,” and you believe him because even though that you’re a wreck now, Jaemin stayed and put up with you.
He suddenly stopped kissing you, letting you breathe and bask at this moment, then he swallowed the lump in his throat and told you the truth. “I’m finally getting there…by the way, I mean, all I think about is us-you,” he was talking about his progress of moving on. “You don’t have to be pressured or anything at this point just, focus on yourself. Okay?” he said and kissed you again.
As your days with Jaemin continues, you don’t see Jeno anymore whenever you’re with Jaemin. No more imagining, it’s just you, the moment, and Jaemin. Though you’re not sure if you’ve already moved on this time or you’re just too overwhelmed because of Jaemin. Still, you know to yourself that you’re getting there and Jaemin is the reason why you’re even more closer to peace now. But you haven’t told him yet because you’re not ready. For you, you know that he will not leave and so it’s okay to take your time.
It started when you realized everything that he has done for you and the things that he’s ready to do for you. Loving again, or being given the opportunity to love someone again so deep is something so special and exciting especially when the man who holds your heart and the one waiting for you right now is Jaemin. The life you’re taking before Jaemin was like a black tunnel that you’ve been walking around in circles for some time now. And you sure as hell don’t want to take that path again.  
And just thinking about experiencing the things that Jaemin has to offer, you can only do that if you give up on Jeno. So with great effort, you slowly focus your mind only on Jaemin and replace every bit of Jeno in your life with Jaemin, and from now on you make sure that you have something in return for him.
“Jaemin-“ you moan his name. Something so new and so satisfying for Jaemin to hear it's his name you moan now, not Jeno’s.
“You know, you make me shy whenever you say my name” he catches his breath and came closer to you to plant kisses on your back and knead your boobs from behind, nipples hard and swollen because you’ve been in bed with him for almost two hours now. “What do you need?” he asks while making you feel good with his lips and hands.
“Maybe slow down? I’m not going anywhere,” you hear him giggle from behind because of your request, slapping your but playfully and squeezing it good. Then suddenly, out of nowhere he rolled his hips, and let out a sexy grunt. “Fuck Jaemin, I wasn’t ready-“ you croak and landed on the mattress, face first as you grip the sheets and take Jaemin’s cock followed by a wave of hard and fast thrusts.
He kept a firm grip on your waist as he gives you hard thrusts and he kept you down on the mattress, a hand on your waist and a hand on your nape. It kept your movements minimal that’s why you can’t do anything now that you’re on the edge and he’s torturing you using his dick. But the best part of Jaemin fucking you from behind is the way he fucks you rough... so rough sometimes that you get red marks after a good round. This only happens whenever he catches his breath, but sometimes his thrusts become slow and deeper and honestly you feel like he’s rearranging your insides. And of course you love it whenever he’s just so fast and the sound of skin slapping surrounds his room and the impact of his thrust just drags you on the mattress, almost at the edge of the bed and he would have to drag your body towards him and fuck you faster and harder.
But this time, your pussy is so sensitive and your body is giving up and shivering already that you try and push him away, moan his name for mercy, grip his sheets while you arch your back so beautifully to ease your sensitivity.
“You said you’re not going anywhere? Why are you running away from me? Huh?” it was a sexy tone and his thrusts started to go slow but deeper than before and he had spread your legs again from behind. His arm is around your neck and ends at your shoulder, bodies closer than ever as he puts his whole weight on you and you feel his hard rock abs hits your back. Then he started thrusting hard again but now you can’t move your body because he got you locked in his arms, and instead of gripping the sheets, you now grip Jaemin’s arm and hands as you don’t have a choice but to accept his hard thrust.
Thrust after thrust, you breathe heavily and let out groans and call out his name. Until your body can’t take it anymore and you’re shaking uncontrollably and you did everything you can to push him away and try curling yourself into a ball but Jaemin was quick to flip you on your back and reach in for a deep kiss.
Kissing you while you cum and enjoy your orgasm. Feeling his tongue swirl around your as your body shakes and his hands caress your thighs so you could calm down and melt on his kiss.
After you cum, you and Jaemin did not stop kissing. He stayed above you, in between your legs and proceed to make out. Slowly and passionately, hands roaming to appreciate each other’s body, hands together and your lips locks and you look at each other with deep admiration.
“I want to date for real now. I’m so afraid to lose you Y/n,” he said directly into your eyes and rested his forehead on yours. “I promise I can do more for you, just be mine completely” he reached for your hands and kissed your knuckles.
Finally, you thought. And to be honest you have so much to say but none came out from your mouth. You looked at his tired sex face, his hair is all over his face, sweaty and his lips are swollen because of your intense kisses. And because your heart is full of happiness right now, you just nod so fast and cup his face and attacked him with kisses.
A love for love.
The first few days with Jaemin were beautiful. You both have your hearts full of love admiration towards one another and you shower each other with love every day without having second thoughts. You have never been loved like this and you didn’t know that you can love someone as deeply.
In just a few days, lust and love were perfectly balanced in your relationship. Now that you’re officially together, you and Jaemin would rather talk non-stop while holding hands, laugh and laugh until you’re both in tears, rather than have sex and exhaust each other out. But of course, now that you’re together, you can finally have the right to stay the night at their house, meet his family, have quiet sex at night where Jaemin’s lips are on your lips, catching every sound and moan you make so his parents won’t suspect.
“I love you,” you said and kissed him before you close your eyes and drift away. In return, he tightens his embrace and kissed you one too many times.
“I love you too,”
Now that you and Jaemin are official, he wanted to do everything again with you. Meaning, he wanted to give you flowers again as your boyfriend this time and not just as someone who’s waiting for you. He wanted to take you out on a proper date as your boyfriend, on your favorite fast food and spend all night long being happy with you.
SUNDAY
At first, you didn’t want to agree with his plan because him giving you all his love every day was enough. But he insists, and that’s why you’re waiting for your handsome boyfriend at your favorite fast food with a glass of water in front of you. He’s 30 minutes late already and you wonder why.
“I’ll get the red ones please, my girlfriend loved those last Valentine's day,” Jaemin’s smile was so big as he watches the florist wrap the red roses he got for you. He’s late because he went to the same shop where he bought you the flowers that you loved last Valentine's day.
And just as Jaemin walks out of the flower shop with a bouquet of red roses in his arm and a smile on his face, he thought about how this night will definitely be a great night for the two of you. And most importantly, no exes to ruin your first date as a couple.
While you were waiting for Jaemin inside, you didn’t know that he’s outside with a dozen roses in his arm and just smiling because he is now looking at the girl whom he loves the most.
Then suddenly, his phone rang and accepted an unexpected phone call. The voice of the girl on the other line was familiar. Very familiar. And his fist balled up immediately when he heard her crying through the phone. Turns out, he still can’t say no to the girl he used to love so much and his excitement on seeing you was immediately replaced with anger.
“Who made you cry? Where are you?” Jaemin asked sternly to his ex.
“He left me Jaems- I’m sorry I don’t know who else to call, I’m at home can you please go here? I really need someone right now, I’ll lose my mind,”
And just like that, he chose his ex over you. He told himself, he will be quick and still meet you afterward. But you waited for an hour… until closing time. Leaving tons and tons of messages to Jaemin but he didn’t return any of them. Maybe something important came up? A family matter? You tried and tried to forgive him even though you’re pissed that he didn’t show up. You even reminded yourself that you didn’t want this date in the first place so why be upset? So it’s okay.  
When you’re finally near your house after a very disappointing date that could have been a beautiful one for you and Jaemin, a very familiar figure was waiting for you outside your house.
One glance at that perfect face, small crescent eyes, and beautiful smile, gave your mind an instant flashback. The guy who loved you first way before Jaemin came into your life, the man who loved you in your highs and lowest moment, the man you’ve been waiting to come back…. is finally back.
“How are you?” he started.
“Better. Jeno, what are you doing here?” you asked, straight to the point.
“I just came by to see you. I’m the one who ruined us but I still miss you from time to time you know? And now I know why,”
“And that is?”
“Regrets. Now that I’m single again, for sure my regrets will even weigh more,” he let out a heavy sigh and looked at his shoes before he gave you a question. A question that he already knows the answer. “If I ask you to come back, will you accept it?” he didn’t look you in the eye. He just stared at the sky and waited for your answer.
“No,” you said honestly and without regrets. “I waited for you to come back long enough. And I worked so hard to be healed again,”
“Then I should’ve asked you earlier then. I should’ve left her earlier,”
What he said sounded wrong for you. Because you know if he did those earlier you will end up hurting Jaemin instead. At least now, it’s clear like the sky above that you no longer love Jeno.
The night ended with a friendly hug. It’s the only comfort you can offer to him because you respect your boyfriend. And you well know that staying longer with Jeno tonight can spark your first fight with Jaemin.
But as you lie in your bed and think about everything that happened tonight, your mind takes you to unwanted scenarios where Jaemin chose to comfort his ex rather than meeting up with you. It’s not right to doubt Jaemin, so you close your eyes and looked forward to the next day.
And just as you thought, you’re going to wake up with a bunch of missed calls or texts from Jaemin, you have none. So there is something wrong.
Jaemin on the other hand is staring at a white ceiling and thinking about the things that he can’t take back right now. It’s too early for regrets but he doesn’t have a choice but to rethink his wrong decisions, over and over again. Starting when he answered the phone call from the naked girl beside him right now. The wrong decisions he made last night was the epitome of the phrase, ‘one thing led to another’
He answered the call and stood you up.
He went to his ex’s house.
He returned the kiss.
He agreed to fuck.
It was all his choice. Wrong choices that made him lose and lost you way before your relationship could have bloomed beautifully. And he can’t take that back because he can't show his face to you anymore for the sexual activity that happened last night between him and his ex, somehow brought them back together.
SUNDAY
It all happened so fast but the heartbreak stayed and the process of healing is very slow.
Seven days have passed already when Jaemin stood you up on a date to choose his ex over you. The reason? Well, you don’t know because you and Jaemin did not talk it out… the breakup sort of happened automatically when you saw him and his now girlfriend again, holding hands while entering the school grounds on a cold Monday morning. And that’s what made it worst because you remember that all you ever did was love him and be better to make way for the love you thought you both want.
Every day, you go to school, attend class, study hard but you always looked so gloomy. Again. And whenever Jaemin crosses paths with you in the hallways, he knew he hurt you badly and that he broke every promise he told you. He can only wish that he could turn back time and choose to not answer that fucking call.
Just like that, you’re back in that black tunnel and you didn’t expect that Jaemin will be the reason why you’re back on this dark path again. And this time, the heartbreak was ten times even worst than what you felt during your breakup with Jeno.  
A few more weeks after the breakup, you started being alone with yourself again and try to give your heart a break from all the drama.
But one fateful afternoon, when everyone had gone home already and you’re on trash duty again, as usual, Jaemin finally decided to swallow his pride and say the apology you deserve.
“I’m sorry, Y/n,” Jaemin said out of nowhere. He was looking straight into your eyes when he said it, and you can see that he’s sincere through his eyes.
“I hope you’re happy” and that's all you can say and try to walk away.
“I’m not- do you still love me?”
It was a question that broke both of your hearts because you both know that even though love is involved, it’s still not enough to keep you together.
But still, you answered him with all honesty. “Yes” short and simple.
“Then let's be together-“ he proposed with hopeful eyes.
“And what? Cheat?” you ask sternly, he nodded. “One of the reasons why I liked you back then is because you’re not complicated. You’re a simple ‘yes’ and ‘no’, but now you’re the one who complicates things. I’m sorry. It’s a no,” and that is an answer Jaemin did not expect from you because he thought you loved him that much that you’re still going to accept him. But maybe, the pain that he’s feeling right now, is the same pain that you felt when he chose his ex over you that night.
As days, months, and seasons change but of course the heartbreak never left, you focus more on being with yourself until finally you survived this school year and today is your last day in school. But before everything ended, a lot has happened before it finally ended, like Jeno suddenly transferring schools, Jaemin is single again, and you were awarded for ranking #3 out of hundreds of other students studying their asses off.
That same afternoon, while you’re fixing your stuff and ready yourself to go home under the pouring rain, Jaemin found you alone in your classroom again. And it felt like you’re meeting again for the first time. You don’t know why you accepted his help, you don’t know why you let him walk you home under his small umbrella that made you walk closely together.
He was quiet. You were quiet. But it was not the comfortable silence you used to have, it was very awkward. But you both endured it because if you’re both going to be honest with your feelings, you both wanted this.
“Are we going to do this again?” you ask before you enter your house.  
“Yes. The right way,”
And you know you both found your way back to each other because it’s the right thing to do.
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xoxo-teddybear · 4 years ago
Text
Goodbyes- Bakugou Katsuki
Bakugou x f!reader (ft. Katsumi, yours and Katsuki’s daughter )
Warnings: Angst, Cursing, Bad Father-Daughter relationship, slight SLIGHT SLIGHT (like 0.00000000000001%) fluff, intense kiss cuz Katsuki’s a SLUT
Summary: Years have passed and even so, Bakugou never gave up on you. You or Katsumi. You were both his family. His girls. He needed the both of you. And he will do everything in his power to bring you both back to him, but his now 16 year old daughter doesn’t plan on making it easy for him.
BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST
Pt.1 Pt.2
11 years have passed since you left Katsuki that day. That horrid day. After leaving the house of hell, you went to Mina’s place to see your daughter. You saw her, happy, with her uncles and aunt. Her world was about to change and so you had to give her every ounce of happiness she could possibly get. You decided it would be best for both of you to stay in the welcoming home a little longer.
While continuing Katsumi’s play date, Mina had suggested you and Katsumi stay with her and Kirishima, but you declined. You knew it would be too easy for Katsuki to find you both and you knew he wouldn’t stop trying if he knew you were both at such easy access. And so, after hours and hours of Katsumi having the time of her life, it was time to bring her to her new home. For the time being at least.
After you left the happy couple’s house, you and Katsumi stayed in a hotel for the time being. It was a very nice place. Plenty of other kids for Katsumi to get along with, luxury rooms, and a pool! You both had stayed there for about a month until you found a gorgeous little house where you and Katsumi could call home. Not only was it spacious, luxurious, and all around amazing, if was far, far away from the previous home your shared with your soon-to-be ex husband.
You both had finally moved in, but that was the least of your problems. Like you told Katsuki, you allowed him to be a part of your daughter’s life. You allowed him to take care of her for 2 weeks, and then it was your turn. 2 weeks would pass and it would be his turn once again. You never allowed Katsuki to know where you both where. You kept your information very hidden and made sure your young daughter wasn’t capable of telling her father the new address whenever she was in his custody. You also never allowed Katsuki to pick Katsumi up. You always dropped her off, but never in a vehicle of your own. Can’t risk having him look up and track down your license plate. And if you couldn’t drop her off, you’d have Kirishima or Mina do it.
As time went on Katsumi continued to ask what was going on. Why was her life suddenly so different? She had asked Katsuki before, but he always told her it was a conversation she should have with her mom. When she asked you, you just smiled at her and told her “Things are changing right now, so it’ll just be me and you for a bit. But a Mommy-Daughter play date sounds fun doesn’t it? And it’ll last for a long time~” you said, hinting at what could possibly be the end of Katsumi and Katsuki’s relationship.
Thankfully, Katsumi liked the sound of that. Even though she was a daddy’s girl, she loved her mommy just as much! Of course her head would constantly be filled with thoughts of Katsuki but what can you do? You can’t bring her back to the cheater. Not permanently at least. You just...can’t.
Katsumi wasn’t the only one who was constantly thinking about family. Katsuki also had his face in every screen, every device, every piece of paper that might be able to help him find you. After you left him, he fell into a deep depression. He lost his two girls and it drove him mad. Even though he got to see Katsumi every 2 weeks, he knew that soon, she’d be old enough to be allowed to know what had happened. He was constantly on the lookout for you and where you could possibly be staying and with his friends refusing to help him, he concluded that for this job, he was on his own. He didn’t care. He had to find you again. He was going to bring his family back together.
A few years had passed. 6 to be exact. Katsumi was now 11 and she had questions. Why does life have to be like this? How long will the family be separated? Will we ever be together again? Due to all the confusion, Katsumi began to lash out constantly. It was like she was a mini version of her father. She needed answers. She needed to be led out of the dark. She needed to know. And it was time you told her. And boy, did you tell her something.
“Katsumi...your father left..because of me. I’m sorry. I was a horrible wife..and he just couldn’t take it anymore. It was understandable as to why he left..so..don’t be mad at him. Okay?” Y/N told her daughter.
Yup. You lied to her. You lied to your Katsumi but you had your reasons. A girl should think well of her father. Especially when that girl considered her father to be her best friend. So no, you didn’t tell Katsumi that the real reason you were separated was because her father cheated on you. You just couldn’t. Not when you knew Katsuki held the most important relationship in his daughter’s heart.
The relationship between a father and daughter is something irreplaceable. Something special. You couldn’t ruin it for her. So you were okay with her being mad at you, for her blaming you. As long as she was satisfied with her father-daughter “relationship,” that was good enough for you.
However, even though you put the blame on yourself, it didn’t stop Katsumi from being mad at her father too. He should’ve stayed. He should’ve tried to work things out. You both were her parents! You couldn’t even at least try to stay together for the sake of her? After finding out the “truth,” Katsumi did indeed grow resentment towards her dad. You were right in the end, and she no longer wanted to see him. That was fine with you. She could hate him, but as long as she didn’t know he was truly a scum, then that was settling as well.
Anger and fury resided in Katsumi. It bubbled up inside her and for the first 3 years in her teenage life, she was a child straight out of hell. Constantly in trouble, constantly taking out her anger on the world. You couldn’t blame her though, it was Katsuki’s fault she was like this. And you soon realized it was your fault since you lied to her too. Even so, you still didn’t tell her the truth. You opted to allowing Katsumi to express herself but with you and you only.
Katsumi was a good child at heart, but she was just lost in the dark. So when her mother allowed her to take her anger out on her, Katsumi did NOT lay a fist on her mother. Instead, she broke down. She broke down hard. Like she’s been broken all along.
“Was I not a good enough reason for him to stay?!” She sobbed out in anger as tears flowed down her face. You held your daughter as she cried and tore down all her walls she spent years building up. “I understand if your relationship was tough..but I hoped that maybe he would’ve came back to try for me at least. How could he just run away?! I just want my parents together. I just want to be considered! I’m not like other kids! I don’t have a family!!”
“I’m sorry, Katsumi.” You would whisper into her hair as she balled her eyes out. You didn’t expect your rebellious and strong child to be so..torn. You knew she was broken and you tried to help however you could but you never expected a meltdown. You were glad it happened though. After that day, followed a few more breakdowns. It was like Katsumi was opening the gates to allow everything to be bare just for her mother to see.
Her mother. Someone she now fully and completely trusts. Someone she loves. She allowed her mother to see all her cracks and damaged pieces. And thank god she did because now your mother-daughter relationship was better than ever. Katsumi replaced the thoughts of her father with happy memories of you. Instead of her father, her mother became her keeper, her guardian, her protector, her hero.
You smile as you look back on the journey you and your daughter traveled on. A happy family of 3, to a sad and confused duo, to a timid and raging two, to finally a content and happy mother and daughter. It’s been one hell of a ride for you, but if it meant reaching Katsumi’s happiness, then you’d happily do it all again.
“G’morning mom!” Katsumi happily said as she walked into the kitchen.
“There’s the beautiful birthday girl!” You happily said as you turned to your 16 year old daughter. Katsumi was no longer harmful towards others. Your once brutal and ruthless bully of a daughter became a sweet, sassy, and fun teenage girl. She was happy now. The sadness and anger finally left...at least, that’s what you thought. And that’s what she thought too. But the inner Katsumi was still in shambles...just..nobody knew that. Not even herself.
Katsumi was quick to jump onto you and give you a hug. She loved you. You became her best friend, her rock. Her protector and hero. It was always you two against the world and Katsumi wouldn’t have it any other way. “Not to be ‘self absorbed’ or anything, but are we doing anything special today?”
“Welll~ I know we haven’t seen them in a few months but I pulled some strings and so! Uncle Kiri, Uncle Denki, Uncle Sero, and of course Auntie Mina will be coming over to celebrate your 16th birthday!” You said with enthusiasm. You watched as your daughter’s jaw drop in happiness as tears of joy began to fill her eyes.
“Seriously?!” She asked with excitement and watched as you nodded your head. She jumped onto you once more and squeezed you tight. “Mom, that’s amazing! Thank you!”
You smiled as your daughter beamed with happiness. It’s been awhile since the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou) came to see Katsumi. Everytime they left their homes, Bakugou grew suspicious and assumed they were seeing Katsumi (and you of course), and even though he was right, he couldn’t know that. So to keep your location hidden from Katsuki, they had to stop seeing you and Katsumi for some time. After a few months, they decided it was perfect for them to pop up again on her 16th birthday, a very special time in a young girl’s life.
“Anything for you Sweetie! C’mon, I made your birthday breakfast and then we can get ready for the day. They’ll be here very soon!” You said to your daughter. She nodded and you both took your seats at the island, enjoying the delicious meal.
Growing up, Katsumi did indeed have friends, but they were more like school friends. She only talked to them in an educational environment but outside of school, her best friend was her mother. She was all she needed. Her friends were her aunt and uncles and that’s why she was more than happy to spend her 16th birthday with just them.
Katsuki looked at the date. His heart stung in pain as he stared down at the calendar.
“Katsumi’s birthday.....happy birthday Baby Bear.” He said in a broken voice. The same broken voice he had that day you left him. The same broken voice he’s had ever since you left him.
It’s been 11 years since you left. It’s been 5 since Katsumi decided she no longer wanted anything to do with him. Katsuki felt like he lost everything and in a way, he did. Even so, he kept the house the same in hopes that one day you’d return.
Over a decade has passed and Katsuki still holds hope that maybe..maybe if he prays long and hard enough..if he remains hopeful..his world will go back to normal.
Katsuki was so lost in thought that he didn’t even realize his own friends were possibly going to visit you and Katsumi. It wasn’t until he heard his phone ding and looked to see a notification from Denki to the Bakusquad group chat. Denki must’ve realized he texted the wrong chat room because he never sent another text. Coming to that conclusion, Bakugou assumed something was going on and so he got ready to make a quick trip to his best friend’s house to get in the know. This was a stretch considering they never told him anything about you, which he’ll agree is deserved, but regardless he won’t stop trying.
He got ready and once he was done he was right out the door. As he pulled up to the house he noticed not only Kirishima and Mina, he saw Sero and Kaminari. Something was definitely up. He pulled over to the side and just watched. He saw the 4 friends talking and laughing and finally, he saw the gifts. That’s what gave it away. He watched as the friends packed gifts into their cars and once he saw Kirishima bring a cake, that was all the confirmation Katsuki needed. They were going to see you. They knew where you were.
Katsuki stayed hidden as he followed his friends on the road. He stayed a few cars behind and took on a slow pace. Thankfully, they never noticed him. As the ash blonde drove he couldn’t help but feel a little stinging in his chest and butterflies in his belly. He was so excited to see you..see his daughter..his family.
The drive felt like forever and it probably was. Katsuki looked at his location on the map and it was then that he really saw how far you had moved. It hurt his heart realizing how much you really didn’t want to see him but the fact that he was going to reunite with you soon was overcoming any negative thoughts or feelings. Eventually, his friends ahead of him had arrived and of course, Katsuki followed. The blonde parked a little ways off from the house and waited. He figured that seeing him would cause some shock throughout the home. Katsuki didn’t expect you or Katsumi to be happy to see him but he didn’t care. He’s willing to go through whatever to bring you both back. So, instead of going in right away, he allowed you and Katsumi to enjoy yourselves for some time before he went in and crashed the place.
“Happy birthday to you~”
“Blow out the candles, sweetie!” You said while holding the cake. Katsumi smiled, took a tiny breath, and took out the small flames. You all clapped for the now 16 year old girl and you placed the cake down. Playful banter and happy talks were discussed all around as you began to cut the cake and pass around slices.
“I can’t believe our little Katsumi’s all grown up!” Kaminari sobbed into Sero’s shoulder. The slender man made a face of disgust as slobber got all over him and pushed the electric blonde off.
“We’re so happy we got to see you today, kid.” Sero said to the smiling little lady.
“I’m really glad I got to see you guys too! You really made this birthday something special. I love you guys! Especially you, Mom. Thanks for everything.” Katsumi said as she walked to you and wrapped her arms around you.
“I’d give the whole world for you Katsumi. As long as you’re happy, I’m happy. Your smile s’all I’ll need.” You said while rubbing soft circles onto her back. You released the hug as chatter grew again.
On the outside, Bakugou was pressed with his back against the door. He was lucky it was pretty late, so no one would take notice of the pro hero snooping on some “random” house. As Bakugou listened in on the party inside, he teared up at the sound of the singing. What you all didn’t know was that on the other side of the door, Bakugou was also singing and wishing his daughter a happy birthday. Although it was Katsumi’s day, Bakugou took her wish, and begged for his family back.
He stayed outside the door for awhile but the sound of his name made his ears perk. “So..how are things with Bakugou?”
You rolled your eyes at Mina’s question. “C’mon. Seriously? Like I’d know.” You laughed a little.
“Y/N, I’m being serious. Katsumi’s 16 now. She hasn’t seen Bakugou in 5 years. Don’t you think it’s a little tough on both of them?” Your pink friend asked. You soften your eyes a bit as you looked towards your hands
“....Of course I do, Mina. Katsumi has always been a daddy’s girl.” You said while looking towards your daughter, who was laughing with her uncles. “She loves him...and so do I. But it was her choice to not see him. ....She thinks I don’t know it, but I’m well aware of just how bad Katsuki’s absence is hurting her. She puts up a strong facade, but I’m her mother and I can see through it. She misses him but she’s too hurt by what happened.”
“But still, what about Bakugou? I know what he did was horrible-“
“Extremely.”
“Right. But he’s still my friend. He tells us everything. He’s so broken by what happened and I’m not saying you should forgive him but if Katsumi misses her dad as much as Bakugou misses the both of you, maybe she should consider seeing him again.” Mina mentioned. You couldn’t believe yourself but you honestly began to consider it.
Back with Katsuki, his eyes widened a bit. A small smiled grew on his face and tiny tears of joy filled his eyes. He made a reminder to thank Mina for her recommendation for you. If you agreed to it, he might get his Baby Bear back. ..He might get you back too. However, a sudden voice made his hopes shaky.
“No, she shouldn’t.”
You and Mina both looked behind you to see your daughter standing there. You both held shocked expressions as you watched her.
“..Katsumi..you don’t ever think of seeing him again?” You asked as her expression grew a mix of hurt and anger.
“No! Not after what he did to you! What he did to us.” She said. You kicked yourself as you and Mina were reminded of the lie you told your daughter. He did hurt the two of you...just not in the way that she thinks. “If he was lucky, and his reasons were good enough, then maybe, maybe I’d forgive him. And maybe I’d go back to seeing him. But he’s gone and he’s not coming back.”
On the other side of the door, Katsuki grew hurt by the memories of what he did. After hearing his daughter’s words, he had enough and finally worked up the courage to knock on the door.
“-he’s not coming back.”
*knock* *knock* *knock*
The 3 of you looked to the door and were shocked at the new guest. Nobody else was scheduled to come. Who could it be? You watched as Kirishima went to open it and took notice of his surprised face. He said a few quiet words, nodded, and then took a few steps away from the door. He looked towards you and your daughter and you felt the whole world stop as you all looked to the man in front of you who had just stepped in.
“....Hey.”
“.....Katsuki.” You said with small tears in your eyes. You looked towards your daughter to see a sad and hurt expression on her face as her jaw slightly dropped.
“...Dad.”
“So.....you’re back.” You said with a broken and bittersweet voice as you stepped to him. You crossed your arms as a way to hold yourself in comfort and to put on a strong front in front of Katsuki. Only problem was, he was the man you loved and who loved you. You’ve been together since you both were babies. He knows how you truly feel.
Bakugou chuckled a bit as he put his hands in his pockets and stepped towards you. “Thank you, Y/N.”
“For what?” You quickly and sternly asked.
“For keeping my secret. You think my dumbass friends wouldn’t tell me what you did?” He began before he was interrupted.
“Hey! At least these dumbasses know it ain’t cool to crash a party!” The electric dunce said as he took another bite of cake.
“Denki!” The rest of the Bakusquad (minus Bakugou) shouted. Bakugou shook his head with a small laugh before continuing.
“Thank you for protecting Katsumi from me. You never once sold me out.” He explained with sad eyes and a hurt smiled. You used your arms to console yourself as you rubbed your sides for warmth. A warmth that only Katsuki could ever help you feel.
“Yeah well...a girl should think well of her father.” You said as you stepped to the side and you both turned to face Katsumi. She held her hands together by the fingers before dropping them and walking to her dad.
“Hi Katsumi.” Katsuki said with a loving, cracked voice. You all watched as Katsumi took small breath before speaking.
“...W-Why are you here? And what do you mean Mom never sold you out? What are you guys talking about?” She asked with her teary eyes.
“..I can answer all of those questions if you talk to me. In private, I’d prefer.” Bakugou said. Katsumi shook her head no before taking a few steps back.
“I don’t want to go anywhere with you.” She said.
“Katsumi,” the said girl looked to her mother who called for her. “You should talk to him.”
“What?” The Bakusquad said.
“What?” Katsumi said.
“What?” Bakugou said.
“There’s some things that you need to know.” You turned to Bakugou as you said this part. “Some things that only you can tell her. That you should tell her. .....You both can talk on the patio.”
“Mom, I don’t want to-“
“I’m not asking, Katsumi. I’m telling you. Go talk to your father. There’s something that you should know.” You sternly said to your daughter. She only stared at you for a minute before looking towards Bakugou and walking to the patio. Bakugou looked towards you and saw you nod your head for approval to follow her. Before he left he pulled you in for a hug. As much as you wanted to hate it, you couldn’t. His scent engulfed you and his warmth finally reached you after so many years. You missed him and your mind and body were quick to give in. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he held onto you by your waist. He embraced all of you and melted into your soft touch that he so dearly missed.
“Thank you, Y/N......I love you.” He whispered into your neck only for you to hear. You nodded, but he knew you still felt the same way when you squeezed him tighter. He smiled at that, and you both finally released each other before he walked to his daughter who was waiting outside.
He opened the back door to find his daughter waiting at the outdoor table. He took a seat across from her and just smiled. She’s really here. In front of him. He finally got to see not only the love of his life but his precious little girl as well.
“...It’s so good to see you, Baby Bear....you’ve grown so much.” He softly said to her. She looked up with sad, angry eyes as she glared at him.
“....Why are you here, dad?” She said in a hurt tone. Bakugou held a shaky smile as she said that word. Dad. Granted, it was no longer daddy but it was something. He loved it either way. He needed to hear it.
“A lot of reasons. To wish my daughter a happy 16th...to apologize..and explain..to see my daughter..my family-“
“We’re not your family. You left us. You don’t leave family.” Katsumi sternly interrupted.
“Right...‘I left you guys.’ ......Baby Bear-“
“Don’t call me that.”
Ouch. That hurt Katsuki’s heart. Broke it even more than it already was. “...There’s something I have to tell you. Something your mother didn’t. Something she lied to you about..to protect me.”
“What the hell are you talking about? Mom is perfect! And amazing! She would never lie to anyone especially me!” Katsumi pointed out as she raised her voice at her father.
“She really is perfect and amazing...and I was dumb enough to lose her. Katsumi...I know your mom told you that I left you both..but in reality...She..left me.” Bakugou said. It felt like lead fell onto his body as he watched his daughter fall into confusion.
“N-No...no you’re lying!” Katsumi said as she stood up and slammed her hands on the table. Katsuki didn’t flinch as he expected this reaction. “She wouldn’t! She wouldn’t tear apart our family..she..she wouldn’t do that...to..to me.” She said as her voice progressively got softer with each word. “Quit lying and just admit that you left us! That you put me and Mom through hell!” Her voice rose once more. “Was I not enough for you to stay?! What did I do that was wrong?! I thought we were the perfect family! I thought...we were happy. Was I not a good enough reason to stay? You couldn’t even try for me? For your daughter? You didn’t even take my feelings into consideration when you left. You didn’t even think about me, Dad.”
Bakugou couldn’t believe it. Your lie was supposed to protect Katsumi, but instead it installed all these insecurities she now has. His friends had told him Katsumi was finally happy..but he guessed she hid all her thoughts..just like he would. She really was his daughter. “Katsumi...it wasn’t like that.”
“You’re lying!!!” Katsumi screamed to herself as tear drops began to fall.
“Katsumi! It’s been 11 years since your mother left me and 5 since I got to see you!” He said with a hurt voice. “Do you honestly think I would wait this long, spend years to find your new home, and come all the way out here just to lie to you?” He watched as his daughter’s face fell as she realized he wasn’t lying. He watched as her faith in her mother deteriorated. He couldn’t let that happen. “Don’t be mad at her though. Be mad at me. She had every reason to leave.”
“..What did you do?” She asked unbothered. She doesn’t care about anything anymore. She doesn’t think she could get any more hurt. Her best friend and mother lied to her about something so crucial. What could possibly make it worse? Katsuki felt his heart beat all around his body. He grew nervous and his palms grew sweatier than usual.
“...I-..Katsumi..*sigh* ...I’m so sorry, Baby Bear.” He slightly sobbed. Katsumi now grew interested. She couldn’t remember much but from what she could, she doesn’t think she ever saw her father cry. Even in the worst situations, he never broke. He always put up a strong front for the world. For her.
“Dad?...” she asked as she sat up in her chair.
“....Katsumi...your mom left me..because I cheated on her.”
There it was. The truth was finally revealed to Katsumi. Plain and simple. Her E/C eyes popped as angry tears filled them. Hurt. Betrayal. Fury. All those emotions she abandoned years ago all came rushing back through her. She began to shake as her breath grew heavy. Bakugou apologized over and over with his head down. Katsumi felt her palms grow hot as they began to spark. Out of anger, she screamed and hit her father with an explosion. The same explosions she got from him.
She watched as her father flew back a few feet and cringed in slight pain. Her blast wasn’t intended to hurt him completely but was more meant to keep him at a distance. She watched as Bakugou got up from the floor and faced her again. Her tears fell heavy as a shadow casted over her eyes. Screw the distance. She ran to him and began punching his chest with everything she had. Thanks to his training, and Katsumi’s distraught state, Katsuki felt little to no pain. He could only look down in heart break as he watched his daughter become a mess due to his actions.
“H-How could you?!” She said as she continued to hit him. “How could you do that to us?! TO MOM! TO ME!” She said and finally looked to her father, showing him her tears, cherry red rose, and puffy eyes. “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU PUT US THROUGH?! Do you have any idea what kind of hell Mom went through?! Mom doesn’t know it but I saw her face! I saw the tear streaks in the mornings, her red, swollen eyes! I saw her sadness behind her happy cover! And not to mention what I did to her! My family broke and I became a little terror. I caused Mom hell. ALL BECAUSE OF YOU, DAD! YOU WANNA KNOW WHAT I WENT THROUGH?! I had to leave my home! I had to move away from my friends! My family! I HAD TO LOSE MY FAMILY! I HAD TO LOSE YOU!!”
Inside the house, the group of friends could hear everything. All the yelling, the shouting. The anger and pain. Y/N had rivers flowing down her face as she covered her sobs with her hand. Her friends settled around her and comforted her through this horrible time. Outside, Bakugou’s face went into a slight shock at his daughter’s last sentence. “W-What?”
“I had to lose you, Dad! You think I don’t remember? You were my best friend. My idol and hero. To me, it never got better than you. ...But you did this? You betrayed Mom. You betrayed me. I love you, Dad, I still do...but I guess you never loved me or Mom.” Katsumi said as she looked down again.
“Katsumi that’s not true. I love both of you with my entire being-“
“So then why’d you do it?” His daughter asked with her voice, laced with pain.
“I was drunk and made a stupid mistake. It’s a day I completely regret because it was the day I tore apart my family and lost everything.” Bakugou said.
“Tch, you didn’t lose anything at all! You still have the house, the money, the fame, the fans. You’re still a pro, you still have everything!” Katsumi shouted.
“I don’t have you or your mother.” Silence grew at the beginning of his confession. “Like I said, you both are my entire being. Yes, I love my job and I’m grateful for everything I’ve earned and accomplished but I’d give it all up in a heartbeat if it meant I’d get to bring you and your mother back home to me. I don’t care about anything else other than the two of you. You haven’t seen me in the past 5 years and in the last 11 years when you did see me when you came over, you never saw my broken side. You never saw how distraught I was. You never saw the hell I went through because I don’t have the two of you, at home, with me.”
Bakugou stepped to his daughter and wrapped his arms around her to hold her. She allowed him to do so and began to silently cry in his chest. She refused to hold him back as her head was still in a cloud of confusion. Does she forgive him? Go back to seeing him? Try to bring her family back together? What to do, what to do.
“I’m sorry for everything I put you through Katsumi. Both you and your mother. I ruined our family and it’s something I’ve regretted for over a decade. But I won’t let you both go. I will do everything in my power to bring our family back together so we can be happy again. And I’m starting here, by telling you the truth.” Bakugou explained. Silence grew once more and Katsumi had finally made her decision.
“Well I suggest you stop trying..’cuz you’re never bringing us back.” Katsumi said as she pushed her father off of her and narrowed her eyes at him. Bakugou stared at his daughter with wide eyes.
“What?” He asked with an exasperated voice.
“You committed the ultimate betrayal. You broke Mom’s heart, betrayed me and her, and broke this family apart. You ruined us. We’ve finally picked ourselves back up and I don’t think we should let the guy who wrecked our world come back into it. ...I’m glad you came and told me the truth..thank you for that..hope you get home safe.” Bakugou was hurt but he understood where she was coming from. He watched as his daughter began to walk away but he wanted to keep her around as long as he could. He knew this probably would be the last time he would get to see her for awhile.
“I’m sorry!” He said with a sob. He watched Katsumi flinch to his sudden booming voice and turn to him. Bakugou looked at his daughter with teary eyes. “You..you turned out great. You’re the best daughter I could ever ask for. Your Mother did a great job at raising you...I just wish I could say the same.”
As Katsumi took in his words, she could feel a heavy weight fly off of her chest. “.....Woah.”
“What?” Bakugou asked.
“...F-For so long, I’ve been mad at the world. For a period of time, I was mad at mom. But for the past 11 years, I always thought I wasn’t good enough. I thought I was a problem..and I was so broken and mad,” Katsumi looked up to her father with tears at the ends of her eyes and a tiny smile. “I-...I’m not mad anymore...thanks to you.”
Katsumi ran back to her dad and wrapped her arms around him. Bakugou was shocked but felt the tears build up again. He wrapped his arms around her and held his daughter tight for as long as she would allow. Time passed and it was clear the both of them were trying to hold onto this father-daughter moment for as long as they could, but Katsumi knew it was time to let go. Before releasing her hold on her father, she allowed herself to say her farewells.
“Goodbye Daddy....I love you.” Was all she said before pulling away from her dad and walking back into the house. Bakugou watched her go and dropped his head as he allowed himself to cry in peace.
When Katsumi entered the house, she was quick to break down again and sob. She ran to her mother who immediately wrapped her arms around her sad daughter. They both held onto each other as Katsumi said her apologies.
“I’m so sorry Mom! There was a time where I blamed you and none of this was your fault. I’m so sorry!” She sobbed and you pulled her back so you could face her.
“It’s okay, Katsumi, it’s okay,” you whispered. “Don’t apologize for anything. None of this was your fault, okay?” Katsumi only nodded as you pulled her in for another hug. The Bakusquad offered to take her back up to her room so she could settle down and you nodded as you allowed your daughter to head to the comfort of her room. The Bakusquad went to help her cheer up and they of course brought the comedic genius, Kaminari, with them.
“Nothing brings more joy in sad times than a goofy uncle!” Kaminari said as the 4 of them walked up the stairs.
“I could name so many more things, Denki. Trust me.” Mina said as she walked along side him. You chuckled at their conversation as they walked up the stairs but soon, your attention was directed to the opening back door. Katsuki walked in with a sad expression but gave a happy glance once he saw you. He walked towards you and you gave him a sad smile.
“So...I guess now she knows.” You said to break the silence.
“Um...yeah..she knows.” Bakugou said as he looked towards the ground. “......Y/N..I’m so sorry,” he said looking back at you. “If I could go back in time and stop myself I would. Because then I would still have my family. My daughter....you. I’d still have you and Katsumi and we’d still be in the same house with another kid a few years younger than Katsumi and then maybe we’d have another on accident because everyone knows I can’t keep my hands to myself when it comes to you,” he joked sadly. You laughed at his fantasy and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t have similar thoughts.
“Yeah..just...maybe if things were different.” You said with your sad smile. Bakugou slowly went in to grab your hand and you allowed him as he moved in closer to you.
“I’m sorry, Teddy Bear-“
“Stop saying ‘sorry’ Katsuki,” you said as you threw your head back with your small smile still plastered on. You faced him again before speaking. “I know you’re sorry. But..there’s nothing that’s gonna change with it. Maybe it’s time for you to move on. Time for both of us to move on.”
Bakugou shook his head at the idea. “No. I know myself. I know I’ll never be able to let you both go. I’ll never be able to move on, even if I wanted to. But I am able to respect your wishes. If Katsumi doesn’t want to see me anymore....then I’ll give her what she wants.”
“I’m sorry, Katsuki.” You said in regards to your daughter.
“S’not your fault Teddy Bear. It’s mine, obviously. Just what happens when you’re an idiot.” He said, degrading himself. You giggled at his comment and went in to wrap your arms around his neck.
“Yeah..but you’re always gonna be my idiot.” You said into his neck. Bakugou held you tight and took in your intoxicating scent. He took the time to memorize the warmth you had, the way you smelt, the way you felt. How amazing it was to hold you in his arms. He drilled it all into his mind so he would never forget.
“I’m glad. ....I love you Y/N.” He said into your soft hair.
“......I love you too Katsuki.” You replied back with all the love you could give. You both pulled away to face each other but felt something immediately draw you back in. You pressed against each other closer than before as your lips slowly came in contact.
This was something Bakugou also drilled in. The way you tasted. Your sweet strawberry lips were something he would never forget. Something he could never resist. The kiss slowly grew more passionate and intense as Bakugou bit down on your bottom lip, releasing a very quiet moan from you. Quickly, he slipped his tongue in and you allowed it as you succumbed to him. The kiss was strong and Bakugou began to push you against a wall but when his hands traveled to the hill of your ass, gave it a squeeze, and you released another moan, you decided it was enough.
You pushed on Bakugou’s chest and kept him back a bit. He looked down at you in confusion but when he saw your small smile and little head shake he understood. He smiled down at you with sad eyes as he nodded. His hands returned to your waist and pulled you in for a final hug that you happily returned. He pulled away but not before giving you a sweet peck on your forehead. He finally stepped away from you and walked to the door. You followed him as you escorted him to the exit and with his hand on the knob, he opened it as he looked at you with the same sad smile that mirrored your own.
“Bye Y/N.” He said on the other side of the entrance.
“Bye Katsuki.” You said with your hand on the door. While he pulled on the knob, you lightly shut the door.
You both placed your backs on your own sides of the door and released a breath you both didn’t know you were holding. A heavy feeling finally hopped off your chests as you both looked up. You both knew that you weren’t letting each other go. That’d be impossible and you knew it. It was more of you both accepting the new reality. You loved each other, wholeheartedly and entirely, but this would have to be the end of your story together.
You’re not letting go...this is just goodbye.
845 notes · View notes
queenshelby · 3 years ago
Text
My Friend’s Father (Part Six)
Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader
Warning: Age Gap, Mild Sexual References
Words: 1,937
Notes:
I have decided to make this into a series.
Alright, no judgment. This was a dream of mine and I felt like I had to write it down. Everyone in this Fic is over the age of 18 and this Fic is in no way based on Cillian’s real family life. It’s pure filth.
 *************************
The Afternoon Before (Cillian’s POV)
Before the opening, Denise had the opportunity to show both of her parents the art which she had created.
Neither of them had seen the photographs before and were rather excited to see what all the fuss was about.
‘Alight, alright…here they are’ Denise said with excitement and, whilst her mother smiled and told her how beautiful they were, Cillian gulped harshly in surprise.
‘Dad, do you not like them?’ Denise asked as he stood there, chin dropped and speechless.
‘They are amazing’ he confirmed although he wished that he had some warning beforehand when it came to the content of the pictures.
Cillian wasn’t sure whether he should look at the pictures in detail or whether he should try and look away. Seeing you like this was difficult and his manhood soon began to stir as his eyes gazed over your perfectly shaped breasts and your messy hair.
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The Opening Night
You stood in front of the large mirror in your bedroom at your parent’s house just outside Galway and tried hard to clip your hair up which had always been a struggle.
Somehow, you managed and the tucked-up hair allowed you to show off your exposed shoulders and back.
The black dress you had chosen for the gallery opening was made out of stretchy fabric. It was simple but yet elegant and left the entirety of your back exposed while a rim of fabric ran across your neck.
You were lucky that your breasts were small as there was no way you could wear a bra with your dress and you certainly didn’t need to.
The dress was flattering around your hips and finished just below your knees.
‘You look nice’ Connor said as he picked you up from your house and, fortunately for you, your father wasn’t home in order to make a scene about your revealing outfit. Your parents were strictly catholic and wouldn’t have approved, nor did they approve of Connor who, in their opinion, was way too old for you.
‘I look nice, do I?’ you chuckled, having hoped for him to choose a different word perhaps, such as ‘beautiful’ or ‘stunning’.
‘Yes, very nice…let’s go, huh?’ he then said and you nodded, following him to the car.
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The drive to the gallery took only 15 minutes and, after Connor had handed his car keys to the valet, you walked inside the building where, almost immediately, you spotted Denise and both of her parents.
‘Oh wow, you look amazing’ you said to Denise before giving her a big hug. As usual, her clothes were colourful and unique.
‘So do you in your sexy black dress…Connor, isn’t she stunning?’ Denise winked, before saying hello to him also.
‘Yeah, she looks nice’ Connor then said, causing Cillian, who was standing behind Connor, to cock an eyebrow. You noticed him looking at you with burning eyes, clearly having noticed the fact that you weren’t wearing a bra.
‘Hey Y/N’ he then said, before giving you a friendly hug as well before you greeted Denise’s mother the same way.
Breathing in Cillian’s scent took your breath away and you immediately forgot about Connor by your side until Denise took it upon herself to introduce Cillian and her mother to Connor as well.
Just as you got talking, the others arrived and it was Amalie who stole the show, wearing the shortest dress she could have possibly found.
You couldn’t help but notice that Connor was staring at her and it was obvious to you that he would have liked it if you wore something more revealing like her.
‘Can’t walk in heels Y/N?’ Amalie then asked sarcastically and you shook your head, wearing nice but flat sandals with your dress.
‘I never saw the point of high heels. They are rather impractical, don’t you think?’ you asked, but Amalie ignored your question and immediately began to hit on Cillian instead which was rather amusing to watch.
***
After the initial chat, you allowed Denise and her parents to talk to some of the other artists and guests and disappeared into the crowd with Connor, trying to hunt down the photographs Denise had taken and which you had not yet seen.
‘You didn’t tell me you knew Cillian Murphy’ Connor said somewhat surprised and you told him that he was just Denise’s father so you didn’t think to mention it. Of course, you would never have wanted Connor to know that you had, in fact, slept with Cillian.
‘Whoah…and you also didn’t tell me that you look like this beneath all your clothes’ Connor then said all of a sudden, interrupting you mid-sentence, as he glanced over to where the photographs of you were displayed.
‘Well, if you had bothered to take off my clothes first before we had sex then you would have known’ you winked as you grabbed one of the glasses of champaign from the bar.
‘We were short of time but, perhaps, I can make it up to you tonight’ Connor then winked and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes, thinking back at this one night a week or so go which was the first and last time you had sex.
‘Apparently you were short for time, yes’ you said teasingly, reminding him that, after ten minutes of missionary, he realised that the football was on and left you high and dry and certainly dissatisfied.
‘Tonight, you can show me what’s under this dress and I will worship this body of yours’ Connor said and his comment made you chuckle.
‘We will see’ you smirked and, just as you did, Cillian walked past the two of you and smiled.
You hoped that he didn’t hear any of this but, then again, if he did, you hoped that it made him at least a little bit jealous.
‘So, what do you think?’ you then suddenly heard Denise ask from behind and, because you were so busy starring at her father, you didn’t realise that she was there.
‘These pictures are amazing Denise’ you said as you were extremely happy with the result.
‘That’s what dad said too actually’ she then said, causing you to blush.
***
As the evening went by and Connor had one glass of wine after another and making several inappropriate and rather controlling remarks, you knew it was time to leave but, Denise didn’t want you to go just yet and, in the end, you told Connor to take a taxi home and that you would see him in the morning.
Luckily for you, he agreed and you were beyond embarrassed by his behaviour as he was trying to dictate what you could do and what you couldn’t as the night went on.
‘He is…uhm…interesting Y/N’ Denise’s mother then said before continuing on and asking you whether you don’t think that he’s a bit too old for you.
‘Oh, I see, you spoke to my parents’ you chuckled as you watched Cillian sip on his glass of wine while cocking an eyebrow.
‘I am just saying, I can see their concerns’ she went on to say, causing Denise to roll her eyes and it was at this point when Cillian interrupted his ex-wife.
‘That’s enough. I think she’s old enough to make her own decisions’ Cillian said and it wasn’t until, some point later when you followed Cillian down one of the hallways to get your coats from the cloak that you had some privacy and Cillian voiced his concerns.
***
‘Be careful alright’ he said after he told you that he was concerned that Connor acted in a controlling way and that he didn’t like the way he was speaking to you.
‘This is not how I meant it Y/N. I am just trying to look out for you’ he said and you couldn’t help but laugh, which is when he pulled you around the corner of the hallway, worried about someone listening to your conversation.
‘Listen, I don’t need you to tell m what to do. I am not your child’ you huffed out somewhat irritated by his comments and you weren’t sure whether it was his concerns that bothered you or the fact that he never contacted you again.
‘Look out for me? That’s funny. It really is’ you chuckled before asking him why he had never contacted you after your visit to Dublin.
‘Why would I have contacted you? I made it pretty clear that, what happened between us, was a mistake. It can’t happen again’ Cillian huffed out and, just as he did, you shook your head in disbelieve.
‘Alright, that’s fine…but stay out of my private life then, please. I don’t need this kind of lecture about who I should be with and who I shouldn’t be with from you’ you said angrily.
‘Common Y/N, you can’t tell me that you actually have feelings for a guy like this. You are more sensible than that’ Cillian said with frustration.
‘I think neither of us have been acting sensibly lately Cillian, wouldn’t you agree?’ you asked, raising your eyebrows.
‘That’s not the same Y/N. Like you said, it was just sex between us. But with him, it’s more than that isn’t it? You are dating him, are you not?’ Cillian then asked sternly.
‘Oh my god, are you jealous?’ you asked angrily.
‘I am not fucking jealous. Why would I be jealous?’ Cillian then asked annoyed.
‘How the fuck do I know. I don’t know how the hell your brain works. After all, you made the same mistake twice. Once, I can understand, but twice?’ you asked with fury.
‘And so did you’ Cillian blurted out.
‘Uhm, yeah, but I didn’t say it was a mistake, you did. For me, it wasn’t’ you huffed out.
‘Fuck, this isn’t going anywhere, is it?’ Cillian then conceded angrily and you shook your head.
‘No, it’s not, just leave me alone, okay?’ you then huffed out angrily and, just as you did, you could feel Cillian’s hands on your hips and your back pressed against the wall behind you near the stairway.
There was an awkward silence between you as you stared into each other’s eyes and, just after Cillian looked over to both sides to ensure that you were alone, he pressed his lips onto yours firmly.
You parted your lips slightly, allowing his tongue to invade your mouth as you gave into this kiss. Your hands were soon tangled in the top of his hair while his hands were caressing your face.
But then, all of a sudden, you pulled away and shook your head.
‘No…no I am not letting you do this again’ you huffed out before walking off.
Whilst you wanted him badly, you didn’t want him to walk away from you again, saying it was a mistake.
   Tag List:
@lilymurphy03@deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall@elenavampire21 @hanster1998@mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-your-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang@0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney@missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15  @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r  @tellingyouastory  @captivatedbycillianmurphy​  @namelesslosers​  @littlewhiterose​  @ttzamara​  @ttzamara @cilleveryone  ​
@peaky-cillian​
@severewobblerlightdragon​  @ysmmsy​  
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goldilockswrites · 3 years ago
Text
Hello, friends!
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♪ I AM AXE.
It’s very nice to meet you and I am happy to see you here. :) On this blog you’ll find posts about my current obsessions, fanfiction and of course, occasional rants. I promise, I only eat people on Fridays, so don’t hesitate texting me. (Unless it’s Friday of course, because then...) For anyone interested, I can speak English and Bulgarian, as well as Turkish (I’m not all that fluent there though). Currently learning German, French and Latin.  Absolutely obsessed with art and literature (especially the Modernism period). My free time is divided between programming and workouts. I love sunflowers, conversations about the weather, colours and sunrises. (Yes, I am in fact the main character in every romantic book out there. Or if you are reading horror the one that gets murdered... Or is secretly the murderer.) 
(Also let’s thank @geocitiesdig​ for our beloved kitten)
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♪ REQUESTS!
Requests are now OPEN!   My ask box is open for any questions or ideas you might have. :)
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♪ RULES!
Well, these are pretty basic, but:
Absolutely NO hate towards anyone will be tolerated on here. You can keep your negativity inside. (No, I am not sensitive to negative comments, I just don’t want the mood of all the amazing people who check out my account to be ruined by assholes :) All my responses to hate are in the #anons are trying to feed my degradation kink tag so mute that if you don’t want to see them.)
NONE of my works are to be translated, re-posted elsewhere or used, without asking for my permission first. (Of course, even in the case of receiving said permission, credit is necessary. No, I am not trying to be an asshole, I just value my time and effort.)
That’s all. I think. 
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♪ MASTERLIST
All the NSFW/smut content is marked with a *. If you notice, I’ve missed said marking somewhere please notify me.  Also pay attention to the TW at the begging of every fanfic, for any possible triggers of yours. 
Add yourself to my taglist here.
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Love, Y/N! - Damiano David 
Summary: Y/N and Damiano’s relationship began with a note, scribbled on a lilac piece of paper, left in the boy’s locker, signed with a “Love, Mia”. After a while the singer figures out that Mia is one of his closest friends, but will her feelings end up being  reciprocated?
Tell Me Everything - Damiano David 
Summary: Will Y/N let the stars take full control of her life or will she let go?
Happy Birthday - Damiano David
Summary: Just some morning fluff with Damiano, that’s all.
After You Leave - Damiano David
Summary: A story about an illicit affair and a crazy chase.
Heartbreak Boulevard - Damiano David (the completed series)
Heartbreak Boulevard: Immortal Whispers - Damiano David (part 2 of “Heartbreak Boulevard”)
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Canyon Moon - Victoria De Angelis  
Summary: Victoria and the reader have history together, when all of a sudden an unexpected encounter makes their lives clash together. What happens? Do they end up together or do they decide to just keep the beautiful memories?
Ghosts - Victoria De Angelis 
Summary: Victoria meets a girl, but is she real?
The Lady of Shalott - Victoria De Angelis 
Summary: A fluffy park date between Victoria and her artist girlfriend.
Friday Never Happened - Victoria De Angelis 
Summary: A store clerk's life is crazy enough, but how much more wild can it possibly get?
Idyllia - Victoria De Angelis
Summary: Y/N looks for inspiration and that took her on a crazy roller coaster between different countries and many careers. Will she find her muse?  
Happy Birthday! - Victoria De Angelis
Summary: Y/N surprises her girlfriend for her birthday.
Thorns - Victoria De Angelis
Summary: Victoria meets her ex-girlfriend (Ava). The unplanned “date” upsets her and she decides to drink and smoke to cope. When she wakes up in the morning her best friend Y/N (who she also happens to have a crush on) is there to try and reason with her.
Nightmare - Victoria De Angelis
Summary: When Y/N has a terrifying nightmare and wakes up screaming, Victoria is there to comfort her.
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Unspoken - Thomas Raggi*
Summary: The reader and Thomas have been best friends for a while. Recently they’ve started catching feelings for each other, but will they be brave enough to face reality and admit their fancy?
The Bloody Chapel - Thomas Raggi 
Summary: When Y/N is asked to be featured in a music video for a popular rock band, she doesn't think she will find love. Yet she finds herself getting close with the guitarist of the group and soon enough she is completely in love with him.
CARPE VINUM - Thomas Raggi*
Summary: Two music students share a room together, but what happens when it’s discovered that one of them has a scandalous career, way outside of music?
A Jar Of Stars - Thomas Raggi  
Summary: Thomas comforts his girlfriend after her eating disorder gets out of hand once again.
Mr. Coffee Man - Thomas Raggi 
Summary:  Y/N is a complicated story of her own, that Thomas is desperately trying to understand. What will happen when the second he gets a hold of her gentle heart he breaks it?
A Hero’s Last Days - Thomas Raggi
Summary: The story of a set-up marriage and the sound of waves.
Happy Birthday - Thomas Raggi
Summary: Just some morning fluff with Thommy, that’s all.
CHARTREUSE MISERY - Thomas Raggi 
Summary: Thomas confesses his love.
Let's just cuddle? - Thomas Raggi
Summary: Thomas and his girlfriend go back to her apartment after a concert. Thommy is being a cute, tired lil bean and Y/N is taking care of him.
The Part Of Me I’ll Always Need - Thomas Raggi
Summary: Y/N’s boyfriend decides to surprise her, by bringing his bandmates to her hometown. The girl suggests they take a walk through the forest and have a picnic. As it turns out after a good hour of wandering it seems they can’t find the spot. Just as they begin doubting Y/N’s knowledge of the trees surrounding here house they find out she’s been planning a surprise all along.
First Choice - Thomas Raggi
Summary: On a day in which Y/N is feeling hurt and upset, Thomas is there to help her through it all and soothe her.
Underneath the singing moon - Thomas Raggi Series Masterlist
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Charm bracelets, memories from Cannes and sketches - Ethan Torchio 
Summary: The reader has taken a stroll around the streets of London looking for a book, she’s wanted for a quite a while. However when she wanders into one particular antique store, she finds a lot more than just a tome of risqué poetry.
Pumpkin - Ethan Torchio
Summary: When Y/N decides to make pasta she doesn’t expect for it to end the way it does.
The myth of sunrises and sunsets - Ethan Torchio 
Summary: Ethan and Y/N are half-Gods, that were once in love with each other. But will destiny allow them to be together?
Pathetic - Ethan Torchio 
Summary: Ethan spots the reader flirting with someone else and reminds her who she belongs to.
Soulmates - Ethan Torchio
Summary: Alexandra has an event to celebrate publishing her novel. There she meets someone, she never expected to meet.
Tea - Ethan Torchio (the completed series)
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Chill - Maneskin*
Summary:  Artist Y/N and writer Ethan have a relationship consisting of occasional fucking, with a slight twist - they are both vampires. So what happens when Y/N finds her "friend" in the middle of a murder he was hired to commit and when all three of his blood-drinking roommates pile into the apartment.
Happy Valentine’s Day! - Maneskin
Summary: V-day blurbs with the Maneskin members!
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Happy Birthday - Harry Styles
Summary: Just some morning fluff with Harry, that’s all.
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Thunderstorm - Eddie Munson
Summary: When reader has troubles going to bed, because of her fear of thunderstorms, Eddie swoops right in and saves the day... Well, the night.
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Also here is my playlist, filled with all the songs I relax and write to. <3
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vinnieswife · 4 years ago
Note
Hey could you please do a Vinnie imagine where y/n is was in a toxic relationships before vinnie so she has trust issues. They get into a fight and she ends up crying and vinnie reassures her that he would never do anything to hurt her.
Trust issues
Vinnie Hacker x reader
Angst, fluff at the end Vinnie being a cute baby
Words:
Warnings: mentions of toxic relationships
Your past relationships had gone well, everything was happy, healthy relationships as everyone would see, but, in your last relationship, everything was different, when you saw it you thought it was a somewhat strange but normal behavior, but from the outside everything looked Extreme and disconcerting, when both of you went out you had to always be by his side, you had to give him the passwords of all your social networks and you could not publish things without his permission, he reviewed all your conversations with any man, whether friend or family member.
Every time you were going out, you had to send your location in real time and send photos of you and your friends, you thought that he only cared about you, until one day he cheated on you, and how he had led you to believe that without him you were not nothing you fell into his horrible arms again.
So you kept forgiving him over and over and over again until you got tired and finished with him, based on screams, tears and a thousand notices from your friends, you got it, you managed to end the relationship.
After all this you took a break from relationships and men in general, until Kouvr introduced you to Vinnie, you both met at one of the parties at the Hype House, you started talking realizing the amount of things that you had in common, you both exchanged numbers and started talking day and night, making long video calls whenever there was time, meeting at the skate park or just watching movies in his room, when suddenly Vinnie confessed his feelings for you, which you corresponded (who didn't? really)
You both started dating 3/4 months ago, with which you made it public, to your surprise people were already shipping you and they accepted you quickly.
Vinnie had taught you everything that a healthy relationship entailed, and he was surprised when you wanted to give him the passwords of your social networks, refusing to accept them assuring you that it was completely fine since you should have privacy
I also taught you that you shouldn't tell him where you were all the time, or ask if you could post x random photos or videos. "Sweetheart you don't need to ask me that things, you control that, it's your decision not mine"
I assure you a thousand and one times that any item of clothing would fit you perfectly, and that you should not ask her permission to go out with your friends, “why do you ask me that? Im not your father, you can hang out with your friends everytime you want love ”or to meet friends since he had full confidence in you. Everything was fine, and it made you feel safe with yourself, reminding you every day how Precious you were, how much he loves you, leaving soft kisses anywhere on your body whenever he has the opportunity, taking an interest in your tastes, hugging you when you are afraid , teaching you everything your ex deprived you of, making it an everyday act.
One afternoon Vinnie went to a party at his old house, the Sway gaming, everything was fine with that, you decided to stay home since you didn't feel like going to a party surrounded by people you don't know or just don't You wanted to get out of the comfort of your bed.
"See you later, I'll text you as soon as I get there, okay?" "Mhm" Vinnie placed a kiss on your forehead stroking your cheek in the process. "I love you" "I love you more" he replied making your heart jump with joy, finally being able to feel that happiness in you.
15 minutes later your phone buzz, you caught it by flipping it over, seeing Vinnie's message on the wallpaper.
"I'm here, I'll see you in 2 hours, I love you <3"
To which you replied with a "okay, see you later, I love you <3"
You lay back on the bed, refocusing your attention on the series you were watching, some time later you fell asleep for the tranquility and comfort, you woke up with a call from Maddy, you and she had become very good friends since Jordan and Vinnie were like brothers.
~ on the call ~
"Hey Y/n"
"Hey Maddy! Is everything okay?" You Asked
"Have you not seen it yet?" She asked
"What? See what Maddy? "
"Just enter the TikTok room"
"Give me a minute"
~ End of call ~
You quickly opened your Instagram, typing the TikTok room user in the search engine, in which you saw a photo of Faith (no hate on her, just her name) being so-so close to Vinnie, too close, he was talking to Jordan while that Faith was clinging to his arm, you trusted Vinnie, of course, why wouldn't he do something like that to you, right? All your insecurities began to surface, and if just going to the party was an excuse? just to fool you? No, impossible, Vinnie wouldn't do that.
You waited for two more hours, eating your head, turning it over and over to try to make sense of it, you started to pen- Knock knock on the door.
You went down quickly and opened the door to find a smiling Vinnie.
"Hello beautiful" he leaned down to kiss you, but you moved away causing him to kiss your cheek.
"Y/n, is everything okay?"
"I don't know, ask Faith"
"What are you talking about?" He asked in clear confusion and with a frown.
You took your mobile from your pocket showing him the TikTok room publication with a description of:
#Vinniehacker with his new girlfriend? What happened to Y/n, have they broken up? Or maybe Vinnie is cheating on her?
He looked at the photo in amazement.
"Y/n is not what it seems, I promise you, it is not so bad"
"As it is not so much apart, Vinnie I am your girlfriend and I would never think of approaching one of your friends like that, besides Faith? Seriously? Of all the girls at the party, did you have to get close to Faith? The girl who hates me and who humiliates me every time she can or comments horrible things in my videos? That Faith? "
"Y/n, she is just a friend, nothing will ever happen between her and me, why you don't understand it?”
“Be-because I am afraid that you will do the same as him" you said with a shaking voice, tears running down your cheeks, and little sobs escaping from your mouth "I am afraid that you will use me, that you make me believe that you love me and then make me damage, that's what scares me "
Vinnie quickly hugged you, pressing you against his chest, one of his hands traveled down to your lower back, pressing you,even more, if it’s possible, while the other hand went up to the back of your head stroking your hair, giving you gentle caresses.
"Hey, hey look at me." He took her chin in one hand, forcing you to look at him.
“Y/n, I want you to know that never. Can you hear me? I would never do something like that to you, you are literally the best thing that has ever happened to me,being with you is like living a little adventure every day, because you are the first person I want to see when I wake up and the last person I will see when I go to sleep, Y/n you make me feel like no one has ever done before, you make me feel good, and I want to do the same for you, yes, that guy filled you with insecurities and you know what? That I will not stop until I eliminate each and every one of them, because I love you Y/n, I love you with everything I have” With each new phrase that came out of his mouth, more tears fell down your cheeks, but these were of happiness and not of sadness and fear. You had finally found someone who loved you in the same way that you loved him and that is happiness.
Then he leaned down and kiss you properly, his tongue dancing with yours in a passionate lovely kiss,one of his hands cupping your cheek and the other one on your waist,your hands traveled to the back of his neck,pulling him closer to you.
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AAAAHHHH I hope you like it like that 🥰
I also want to notify that my orders are open, in case someone wants any special one💕
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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years ago
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TO LOVE AND BE LOVED - Part Four (Harry Styles)
a/n: happy TLABL day!! can’t believe we are already on part 4! im not sure if part 5 will be the last part, im still very much writing the rest so we’ll see! thank you so much for all the love you’ve been showing the series, i love reading your reactions! feedback is very much appreciated this time as well!
pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader
warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce
word count: 11k
SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist
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You wake up feeling like you’ve been hit by a truck or at least consumed a whole bottle of tequila. Your head is pounding and it’s probably with all the crying and stress, so you are quick to take some pills to ease the pain. Sitting on the edge of your bed you stare ahead of you blankly, trying to gain power to start the day.
Though today is Sunday, so you are not working, you’re still worried to face Harry after whatever it was that happened last night. What were you thinking, kissing your boss out of the blue? And what was he thinking kissing you for the second time? It kind of feels like a dream, but you know it really did happen.
You try to stay in your room as long as possible, avoiding to face Harry, but soon enough you can’t postpone it any longer, because you are starving. Peeking out of your room you hear voices coming from downstairs and as you reach the stairs you recognize not just Harry’s and Izzy’s voice, but Niall’s as well.
Arriving downstairs you see Niall and Izzy sitting on the stools at the kitchen island while Harry is cleaning the dishes after their breakfast probably. He is wearing a pair of light-washed jeans and a black hoodie, the sleeves bunched around his elbows. He looks so casual and yet just looking at him makes your heart skip a beat. You are in some big trouble.
Niall spots you first and he perks up waving in your way happily.
“Good morning, Y/N!” he beams, his accent sounds so comforting in such a stressful moment, for some reason.
“Hi, good morning,” you breathe out. Harry turns around, his eyes fall on you and a shiver runs down your spine. He just looked at you and you already want to run away and hide in your room a little longer.
“Morning,” he greets you with a nod before turning back to the sink to finish the dishes.
“Daddy and Uncle Niall are taking me to the park! We are picking Yara up too!” Izzy shares the news with you excitedly.
“Oh, that sounds great!” you smile at her, giving her cheek a gentle pinch before moving to the fridge.
“Do you want to come?” she invites you and your eyes immediately flicker over to Harry who looks at you the exact same time, making your stomach drop right away.
“Um, I have some work to do, maybe some other time,” you smile at Izzy, grabbing yourself a yoghurt and a banana before shutting the fridge closed.
“So how was yesterday?” Niall asks and you freeze. Does he know what happened? Did Harry tell him about last night?
Niall sees your frightened look to which he shoots you a confused one.
“The wedding, Harry told me earlier you had a wedding yesterday.”
“Oh, it went… fine,” you nod shortly, peeking at Harry who is now staring down at his feet awkwardly. This was starting to get painfully ridiculous, the two of you dancing around each other, pretending like you weren’t down each other’s throats just a few hours prior.
“Alright, let’s leave, we need to pick Yara up in twenty,” Harry claps his hands. Izzy jumps off the stool and takes Niall’s hand as they all head out of the house. “We’ll probably have lunch somewhere and then go grocery shopping, so we’ll be away for a while,” he informs you without looking your way before leaving without even waiting for any reaction from you.
Yeah, this was straight up the most awkward conversation you’ve had in a long time.
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“Here, Izzy. Play some games on my phone!” Niall passes his phone to her with a sweet smile, but Harry smacks his bicep.
“What are you doing? She has enough screen time already!”
“Yeah, but I needed her to be busy so I can ask you what the fuck was that in the house.”
Harry curls his lips into his mouth, his eyes glued to the road ahead of him as he tries to come up with a good answer, but he knows he could never fool his best friend.
“Don’t stop, even if she is busy with the phone,” Harry scolds him, glancing at Izzy through the mirror, but she doesn’t seem to be listening to them. Niall rolls his eyes, but lets his words uncommented. “Besides, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” “Oh, you exactly know it. You and Y/N were like scared little bunnies around each other. She looked like she was about to faint any moment when you looked at her.”
“Maybe she was just tired,” he shrugs, but Niall laughs at his weak attempt to fool him.
“Now tell me the real reason, I know something happened.”
Harry chews on his bottom lip, debating whether he should come clean or not, but he knows Niall won’t leave him until he finally tells him so he is not left with many choices.
“We kissed.”
“What?!” Niall snaps, a little louder than Harry expected, his voice makes him flinch. “Sorry, that was a little too dramatic, but what the fuck? Why were you keeping this from me?!”
“Because I knew this is how you’d react,” Harry mumbles under his breath. “And… I don’t think it will ever happen again.”
“What do you mean?”
“The whole thing was a mess,” Harry sighs. “She came home late, pretty upset because she met with her ex at the wedding.”
“The one that cheated on her?”
“Mhm. The dude was an asshole and… she was crying in the kitchen when I came down. We sat on the couch, talked, I tried to calm her down and all that and then… she kissed me.”
“Wait, she kissed you? Wow, she’s got balls!” Niall laughs.
“Yeah, but it was, like, really short and she pulled back, shocked at herself for doing it. I think it was just all the emotions that got her a little confused. But then she tried to apologize and… and I kissed her.”
“What?! Oh my God!” Niall’s mind is blown and he doesn’t even tries to hide his excitement hearing the news about last night. “Was there tongue?”
“Jesus, Niall!” Harry scowls. “I’m not sharing the details with you.”
“Okay, but was it like a solid, short kiss or you guys went right at it?”
Harry doesn’t answer, but it tells enough about the situation and Niall can’t help but whistle as he claps his hands.
“Stop acting like a horny teenager, Niall,” Harry growls rolling his eyes at his friend.
“So you guys snogged, what’s the matter with that?”
“It got awkward. We just pulled back and I think we both were pretty shocked about it and… she just stood up and said that she is going to bed. End of story. And then you were there in the morning, so… yeah.”
“Tell me why the hell we are heading to a playdate then when you should be talking to her?” Niall asks, arching an eyebrow at Harry.
“There’s not much to talk about. It just happened in the heat of the moment, that’s all,” Harry shrugs, but deep down he knows it’s a blatant lie. At least on his side.
Unlike you, who fell asleep right away, Harry spent about an hour lying in his bed wide awake, not able to think about anything else but your lips on his. He replayed the whole thing in his head about a million times, he was starting to feel ashamed of it, but he just couldn’t stop.
Your abrupt leaving left him puzzled and he thought long and hard about why you felt the need to run away. The only thing that made sense to him is that you regretted it the moment it happened, that it really did just happen in the heat of the moment so Harry thought it’s best to act like it didn’t even happen.
“Please don’t be an ass and just… talk to her. We both know we can never know for sure what a woman thinks about. You can’t just assume and think that your assumption is one hundred percent right.”
“I find it funny that you’re such an expert in this stuff, but you haven’t had a stable relationship since like, we finished college,” Harry scoffs as he takes the corner and starts driving down the street to Yara’s moms’ house.
“Me not having a relationship doesn’t mean that I’m not good at them. It’s a choice,” Niall smirks.
“Yeah, whatever.”
“But back to the topic, you wanted to kiss her, right?”
“I mean, yeah? It kinda threw me off as well, but it was… nice.”
“Please don’t refer to a kiss as nice again,” Niall gags, but Harry just chuckles at him. “A kiss is hot, passionate, pant tighteni—“
“Okay, that’s enough!” Harry cuts him, earning a cackle from him.
“Just talk to her, don’t be a pussy.”
“I really do need better friends,” Harry mumbles under his breath as he pulls up to the driveway.
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You really didn’t feel like staying home alone in that big ass house so you invited yourself over for an early dinner to your mom’s. You haven’t been over since the little fiasco with Trevor so you thought it might be a good idea to spend some time with them. Trevor said they’ve been trying to keep the fighting down to the minimum and not let it turn into a screaming match, so your speech worked after all.
It’s past three o’clock when you leave, no sign of Harry or Izzy and you feel like they won’t be back for a while either, so you lock everything up and head out.
You have a genuinely good time. It’s obvious that your mom feels guilty about her past behavior and is trying to lure you into forgiving her, though you already did that. But you’re happy your little speech worked. At least Trevor can have his peace now.
After dinner your mom disappears in her room and then returns with a nicely wrapped box and you sigh, rolling your eyes.
“Mom, I told you I don’t need gifts.” You give her a look. Your birthday is coming up next week, but you were never the kind to celebrate. You never felt comfortable with all the attention and fuss birthdays come with, so you’ve always liked to keep it down. These past years you didn’t even ask for anything, though your parents never listened and this year doesn’t seem like an exception either.
“Oh hush. You can’t expect me not to celebrate my baby!” she shakes her head, sitting back to the dining table. “And besides, I didn’t pay a dollar for it,” she then adds and now you’re curious what she got you.
Removing the lid of the box you peek inside and your lips immediately part as you see the stack of polaroids inside.
“I know how much you like old photos and when we sold Grandma’s house back in August, I found these in my old room. I got a polaroid camera for graduation, just in time to take tons of pictures of you,” she explains with a soft chuckle as you start going through the pictures from when you were born and the next few years. Whenever you are done looking at a photo you hand it to Trevor so he can take a look at them too.
“Are you sure you don’t want to keep these, mom?” you ask glancing up at her over the stack.
“I took out a few for myself,” she admits with a sneaky smile. “You can have the rest, I know how much you love these stuff.”
“Thank you, mom,” you smile at her, hugging her from the side, feeling touched by this gift.
It’s nearing eight when you arrive back home, the lights are still up and if you had to guess you’d say that Harry is trying to tire Izzy out enough to put to bed, as usual. Walking in, your guess is proven right, the TV is on in the living room while Harry is sitting on the couch, Izzy all over him in her pink pajamas, playing around with his hair like she always does.
“Hi Y/N!” she calls out happily when she spots you.
“Hi Sunshine, did you have a good time today?” you ask with a soft smile.
“I did! And guess what!”
“What?”
“Yara invited me over for a sleepover!” she beams, clearly ecstatic about the invitation.
“That’s amazing!”
“What’s that?” she curiously asks pointing at the gift box in your hands. Harry turns to see you, his eyes falling on the box as well.
“Oh, it’s a gift I got from my mom,” you explain, stepping closer.
“Is it your birthday?” she questions, knitting her eyebrows together.
“No, not yet. But it will be next week,” you admit with a soft chuckle.
“Really? Are you having a birthday party?” she gasps, getting way too excited already. Harry eyes you without a word, holding Izzy by her hips so she is not losing her balance standing on the cushion of the couch.
“I’m not, sorry. I don’t like having birthday parties,” you pout at her apologetically.
“Oh, okay. Can I see what you got from your mom?”
“Izzy, don’t be nosy,” Harry warns her, but you just smile at the curious girl.
“Sure,” you nod, joining them on the couch. You sit on the opposite end than where Harry is, Izzy in the middle as she watches the box in awe. You set it down to the cushion and take the lid off, revealing the stack of photos.
“What are these?”
“They are called polaroids. They are old pictures, taken with a special camera that kind of prints the picture out right away,” you explain to her as she takes the first photo from the top, a picture of your mom holding you as a newborn. She was so young, practically a child herself, yet her pride was undeniable, it shone all over her face.  You spot Harry looking at the picture as well over Izzy’s shoulder, still keeping his silence.
“Who are these people?”
“That’s my mom and that’s me as a baby. And… this is my dad,” you hold up another photo that features your dad.
“They really were young when they had you,” Harry speaks up for the first time, surprised by the photos.
“Yeah, they were.”
“What are you going to do with them?” Izzy questions, dropping the photo back into the box as she leans back to lie on Harry’s chest.
“Not sure yet. I might make an album from them,” you shrug. “I really like polaroids, I love that they are one of a kind.”
Izzy nods, though you’re not sure she understood what you meant by that. Fidgeting with her fingers she pushes down a yawn and Harry takes that as a good sign.
“Alright, time for bed, Love. Say good night to Y/N.” He picks her up as he stands from the couch. Izzy waves at you smiling with tired eyes.
“Night-night, Y/N,” she singsongs as Harry carries her towards the stairs.
Putting the pictures back into the box you head into your bedroom too, feeling like the time when you and Harry talk about what happened yesterday will never come. It’s pretty clear that he doesn’t want to acknowledge it, so you’ll just let it slip. It happened just in the heat of the moment, didn’t mean a thing, you better forget about it.
After a speedy shower you are getting ready to just go to bed, read some and have a relaxing evening, something you didn’t have the luck to have the day before. But right as you’re about to make yourself comfortable in bed, there’s a knock on your door.
“Hey,” you breathe out as you open it and find Harry standing in the hallway.
“I hope you weren’t sleeping already.”
“No. Come on in,” you invite him inside and he walks in. As he awkwardly stops in the middle of the room you realize he hasn’t even been in here since you’ve moved in. He takes a look around, examining what you’ve done with the room and you feel thankful you decided to put your laundry away just yesterday, so no dirty underwear is littering the floor anywhere.
“How can I help you?” you ask with a soft smile.
“I, erm… I just wanted to clear some things,” he starts, clearly feeling nervous about the conversation and that makes the two of you for sure. Nodding you let him know that you’re waiting for him to carry on. “What happened yesterday…” he starts and your breath gets caught in your throat. “You were very emotional, a lot happened and it was a very confusing moment probably for the both of us. I really like working with you, I’m very happy with the way you’ve been taking care of Izzy and I would hate to ruin it with anything.”
You can feel your stomach dropping even though you were bracing yourself for this version of the situation. It was very likely that Harry would want to keep things professional, like before, but it still makes you feel like shit.
“I’m sorry for stepping over some boundaries, but I really hope that… we can put it behind us and that we can move on.”
He is using his business tone. It’s the same tone he used with Sarah and his assistants and now he is using it to talk about the kiss that happened between the two of you.
“Sure,” you answer quietly nodding. “Moving on sounds… great,” you nod, forcing a smile to your face, but it couldn’t be more fake.
Harry nods as he runs his tongue over his lips, looking around a little awkwardly now that it’s been discussed.
“Alright, then… good night, Y/N,” he nods in your way before heading towards the door.
“Good night, Harry,” you mumble after him as he walks out and closes the door behind him.
As soon as you are on your own, you let out a shaky breath, falling to your bed, lips trembling as you try to even make out what you’re feeling. Because part of you is glad he didn’t make a fuss about it and you didn’t lose your job, that’s great news. But another part, which is vehemently bigger than the first one is upset and sad and… disappointed?
You were hoping it meant something for him, you wanted him to want it, to feel the same craving for you as you feel towards him, because you haven’t really stopped thinking about what his lips felt like against yours, what it was like when his fingers dug into your thigh, how it sent a shiver down your spine when his tongue met yours.
But this conversation just made it awfully clear that he wants nothing to do with you. And it hurts probably more than it should.
 Harry doesn’t get too far from your door when he feels the all too familiar pain in his chest he has been forced to live with these past over three years. It’s like something is gripping his heart and lungs in his chest so tight, even breathing is a hard task.
Rushing into his bedroom he closes the door behind him and slides down to the floor as the tears flood from his eyes. The past twenty-four hours have been rough on him, the guilt has been growing immensely since he let himself slip and give in for his desires and eventually kiss you.
It’s not that he didn’t want it. Because he’d be lying if he said it meant nothing to him and that he hasn’t been craving it these past weeks.
But his guilt, this evil little voice in the back of his head wouldn’t let him enjoy it even the slightest.
How dare you kiss another woman after your wife? Are you insane? You don’t deserve to feel this way with anyone else. Not when you were the reason your wife ended up dead!
Heartbreaking sobs escape from his chest as he pushes himself up from the floor and heads into the bathroom. He strips out of his clothes leaving them all in a pile on the marble tiled floor before he steps into the shower and lets the hot water pour down on him, almost burning his skin, but he doesn’t change the temperature, as if he was trying to punish himself. His salty tears mix with the water as he stands still, chest heaving as his vivid memories from that night come crashing down on him all at once.
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“Are you giving me the silent treatment now? Really?” Harry sighed at his wife when she failed to answer his question about the whereabouts of his sweatpants. Maggie sat on the bed with the recent maternity book she’d been reading these past days, not even paying her husband a look at his question.
“Mags, for fuck’s sake, I’m not in the mood to play this game right now,” Harry sighed in defeat. Maggie looked up at him, closed the book slowly and put it aside to the bedside table.
“So the question of expanding our family is just a game to you?” she asked calmly, but her anger and disappointment in her husband was soaking through her tone.
“You know that’s not what I’m talking about.”
“No, you are not talking about anything, because you refuse to have a fucking conversation with me!” she retorted, letting all her bottled up anger out that’d been boiling inside her.
“I already told you that I can’t think about having another baby right now. Izzy is only six, I’m in the middle of a huge project, I don’t have the capacity to think about having another baby, Maggie. I thought I made it clear, why are you still onto me then?”
“Because it’s not something we can put aside for too long! I don’t want to have another baby when I’m in my mid-thirties, but if we go with your plan, we won’t even have another one!” Maggie jumped to her feet, pacing the floor back and forth next to their bed as Harry stood with his hands on his hips, getting irritated that they were fighting over the same thing again.
“I never said we can’t have another baby, but why can’t we wait a little? When Izzy is older and more independent? Do you have any idea how hard it is to take care of a baby and a toddler? It’s a fucking nightmare!” Harry growled rolling his eyes.
“So our family is just a pain in the ass for you?” Maggie questioned, folding her arms on her chest and she was really getting on Harry’s nerves, twisting his words completely.
“That’s not what I said!” he snapped. “All I’m asking for is you to be a little patient and give me some time!”
“I don’t have time, Harry! I want it as soon as possible!”
“Why are you so fucking difficult?” Harry groaned, running his hands through his hair. “Why can’t you wait just… one year at least? Is that too much to ask?”
“And is it too much to ask to focus on your family? We are supposed to come first!” she turned it back around and Harry was not having the dirty games she was playing, putting all the blame on him when she could have been a little more understanding as well. He was feeling like his opinion was put aside and didn’t matter at all.
“You do come first, you don’t have the right to question that.” Harry pointed at Maggie, his blood practically boiling at this point.
“Then why do I feel like work is always more important to you?”
“What are you talking about? You know I’m home as much as I can, but we still need the fucking money, Maggie! Or how do you plan on paying the bills of this fucking mansion?!”
“I don’t need a mansion! I just need my family and that’s all!” she argued, but Harry rolled his eyes at her.
“Well you seem to enjoy this mansion a lot when you sit by the pool and watch movies in the fucking movie theater in your own home!” he snapped back feistily. “Stop acting like I don’t do shit for our family when I work my ass off to provide the best possible life. And all I’m asking for in return is some fucking time before we bring another baby into the picture!”
“You are so fucking unbelievable,” Maggie shook her head as she marched past him, walking away from the fight that just grinded his gears even more.
Just as Harry was about to go after her, he heard the faint crying through the baby monitor. Groaning he headed into Izzy’s room and as he took her out of her crib, he heard the front door open and shut.
“Aw, baby, I’m sorry, did we wake you up?” he cooed, hugging the crying little girl to his chest who clung onto him immediately. Even at such a young age, Izzy was already a daddy’s little girl.
Soon her cries died down to just little hiccups as Harry soothed her, patting her bum and back gently as he moved around the room. Holding Izzy in one arm he grabbed his phone with his free hand and typed a message to his wife.
Harry: Where did you go?!
Maggie: I’m going over to my sister’s. Don’t wait up, might get home late.
Harry couldn’t help but roll his eyes. She called him out for running away from the conversation, but when they were finally talking about it she just decided to disappear when it didn’t head in the direction she wanted, seeking comfort at her sister, as always.
He managed to lull Izzy back to sleep, putting her back to her crib before going back to the bedroom. As time passed by and he calmed down more and more he wished Maggie was home so they could talk about it without jumping at each other’s throat. There had to be a compromising way to solve the situation that would be fine for the both of them.
Harry: Please come home and let’s talk about it.
Maggie: So you can bite my head off again?!
Harry: Mags, please. You have to understand my point of view too!
Maggie: I understand it, but I don’t agree with it. And you don’t seem to understand mine��
Harry: I do, but there are more things to consider. Please come home, I don’t want to have this conversation over the phone!
Maggie: Okay, I’m heading home now.
Harry put his phone down to the nightstand with a long sigh, already tired from everything that happened that day and he knew this conversation would be a hard one too, but they needed to be on the same page when it came to their family.
It was late getting late and Harry grew a little more restless with each passing moment. Paisley, Maggie’s sister lived about thirty minutes away from them and it’d been forty minutes since she sent her last text. At first he figured she maybe stayed and talked for a little longer with Paisley, or stopped for some fast food which he knew she liked so much whenever she was upset, but when an entire hour passed by he was getting worried.
He kept sending her texts that didn’t even get delivered and when he tried to call it went straight to her voicemail. Harry was losing his shit so he decided to call Paisley to see if she knew anything about her.
“She hasn’t arrived home yet?” she asked, clearly surprised.
“No, and she is not answering my calls and texts. When did she leave from yours?”
“A long time ago. Almost right away when you texted her to go home.”
“Fuck,” Harry breathed out, anxiously pacing the floor as he held the phone to his ear. “Okay, can you please call your parents in case she went there for whatever reason? I’ll try her friends.”
“Yeah, sure. Let me know if you got a hold of her,” Paisley told him before they ended the call.
Harry was scrolling through his contacts, trying to decide who Maggie would go to first in this situation and just as he was about to call the first person, his phone started ringing with an unknown number.
“Hello?” he answered the call unsurely, his heart beating fast in his chest as he stood in the middle of the room.
“Mr. Harry Styles?” a male voice asked on the other end.
“Yes, it’s me. Who am I speaking to?”
“I’m Officer Field speaking. You were listed as the emergency contact for your wife, Margaret Linn Styles.”
Blood rushed out of Harry’s face faster than he could even process what was happening. He stood completely frozen, his hands were getting clammy as he started sweating as if he just ran the marathon.
“What happened?” he asked weakly, barely even finding his own voice.
“Mr. Styles, I have bad news…”
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Harry makes his way down to the entertainment room, walking like a zombie, only thinking about the bottle of vodka that sits in the minibar down there. Following his skin burning shower he tried to go to bed, but his head was starting to spin from everything that’s been swirling in his mind and he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop it if he didn’t numb himself somehow. Unfortunately, his only way of doing it has been drinking, nothing seemed to help him the way alcohol did and though he knew he should never solve any of his problems with drinking, he still couldn’t help himself sometimes. When the pain was growing immensely, taking over his whole body, he chose the easiest way to get rid of the guilt or at least stop himself from… feeling.
Grabbing the bottle from the mini fridge he snatches himself a glass as well, not drinking straight from the bottle at least, and plopping himself down to the couch he pours a generous glass, drinking it without any chaser.
He winces as the alcohol burns down his throat, but at least it’s a different kind of pain, that takes the focus away from the one he is feeling in his chest.
One glass chases the other and since he is not particularly used to the heavy drinking, he is more like the ‘let’s nurse this pint for an hour’ type of guy, the raw vodka kicks in pretty quickly.
 But he is not the only one who can’t fall asleep tonight.
You tried everything in your power to end your misery and finally fall asleep, but your mind and body was plotting against you and made you toss and turn until you couldn’t take it any longer. Making a good cup of tea seemed like a good idea, so you headed down the kitchen.
As you round the corner after the stairs and you’re about to walk into the kitchen, you notice how the lights are on down in the entertainment room. You stop in your tracks and try to think back if anyone was there before you went upstairs, but you don’t think it was the case.
You figure since there are only two adults living in the house, it must be Harry down there and right now, facing him doesn’t sound like a good idea, so you decide to leave him be, but that’s when you hear the voice of some kind of glass breaking, followed by a heavy accented cursing and it changes your mind right away.
“Harry?” you softly call out as you walk down the stairs, not sure what to expect down there. He is crouching down, his back in your direction as he is trying to get the pieces of the broken glass up from the floor, but he is too disoriented to succeed in the task and it’s obvious that an injury is deemed to happen sooner or later.
“Harry, you’re gonna cut yourself!” you warn him, and walking over to him you pull him up from his squatting position and when he looks at you is when you realize that he is drunk out of his mind.
“Y/N, oh shit, did I—Did I wake you up?” he slurs, knitting his eyebrows together as he tries to focus his vision on you.
“You didn’t, but let me just—Why don’t you sit down for a moment while I clean this up, huh?” you suggest, pulling him towards the couch, making him sit. He falls to the cushion like dead weight, letting out a tired sigh while you rush to get a broom and a dustpan to get rid of the broken glass on the floor as fast as possible before someone cuts themselves.
“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” he breathes out closing his eyes.
“It’s okay. I’ll just clean it up quickly,” you assure him, getting down to business.
“Not about the g-glass. Well, about that as well…”
“Then why are you sorry?” you ask, as you sweep the shards onto the dustpan and throw them into the closest trashcan.
“About being… a pain in the ass,” he hiccups.
“You are not a pain in the ass,” you chuckle softly as you sit beside him.
“I am. I fucked things up,” he nods with a painful expression all over his handsome face.
“What do you mean?” You know you shouldn’t make him talk in this state, but you can’t help your curiosity. It seems like drunkenness makes his tongue run wild and you are desperate for the tiniest crumble of information about what’s going on in his head.
“I just… I kissed you,” he breathes out, his eyes popping open, but he is staring at the ceiling, not you.
“And?” you ask, trying to act cool, though your pulse is rapidly increasing.
“And I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Oh.” You lick your lips and try not to show how much that hurt. But even drunk, Harry notices the disappointment in your tone. His glassy eyes snap over to you and his face falls right away.
“That’s not how I mean it!” he gasps, reaching for your hand and you’re surprised by the sudden physical touch, but it feels kind of nice, so you let him hold your hand between his arm palms. “It’s not like I didn’t enjoy it, because fucking hell, it was amazing!” he bluntly tells you and you can already feel the heat crawling up your neck.
“Really?”
“Yes!”
“Then why did you tell me all of that in my room just earlier now?”
Harry pulls his hands back and moves his arms across his face, covering his eyes as he slides down the couch, his legs spreading out in front of him. He lets out a shaky whimper and seeing him like this worries you a lot. Harry is always in control, he has never let him fall apart like this before.
“Because… I don’t deserve to feel this way,” he confesses, confusing you even more. What is he talking about?
“Why wouldn’t you?”
He shakes his head under his arms, biting into his bottom lip as he inhales deeply, like he is trying to keep something inside, something you shouldn’t know about, but now you are desperate to find it out.
“I’m a fucking mess,” he breathes out, letting his arms fall to his sides, but he keeps his eyes closed, shutting you out in a way. “I don’t deserve to have these feelings,” he repeats again and it appears he is more likely talking to himself, rather than to you.
“Harry, what are you talking about?”
“I can’t tell you. I can’t tell you, because if I did, you’d never be able to look at me again.”
Now he is crying. Tears are rolling down his cheeks and his lips are trembling and you’ve never seen him in such a vulnerable state and quite frankly, it scares you. You knew him to be a strong and stable man, but now he resembles a frightened little boy, so lost in this big world.
“I’m pretty sure it’s not that bad, Harry.”
“It is,” he winces, as if it’s causing him physical pain to even talk about it.
“Harry…” You breathe out and moving closer you place a hand on his knee, giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze. He turns to face you, his eyes all watered and glistening, he looks so heartbroken, it almost pains you as well.
“Promise me you won’t see me as a monster,” he whispers.
“I-I promise,” you nod, already bearing yourself for the worst, judging from the look on his face.
Taking a deep breath he looks around, as if he is making sure no one else is listening. Then his eyes fall down to his hands in his lap, he fidgets with his fingers, his tongue running along his pink lips before he takes a deep breath and speaks up again.
“Maggie’s death… It was all my fault. I fucking… killed my own wife.”
His voice dies down at the end of the sentence, staring into the void, completely zoned out as you sit beside him, shocked at his words. This was not exactly what you were expecting him to say. Harry starts sobbing again, the hot tears running down his cheeks as he starts crying and panic sets in you. He is so out of his own world, you have no idea what’s happening to him. Rushing over to the mini fridge, you grab a water for him, thinking it might help him at least after all the alcohol he has consumed.
“Here, drink some water,” you softly tell him, taking the cap off as you hand him the bottle. He takes it with a shaky hand and raising it to his trembling lips he takes a few small sips. “Harry, what do you mean it was your fault?” you ask, knowing well you probably shouldn’t push it, but you can’t just ignore what he said.
“Exactly what I said,” he sobs shaking his head vigorously. “It was all my fault, I was a fucking coward and that’s why she died! I could have stopped her! I should have gone after her!”
He is not answering you, not entirely. He is speaking thoughts that have been planted in his head a long time ago and they seem to be on repeat whenever he is feeling down. As much as you want to get more details out of him, he needs to rest, especially because he is working in the morning.
“Come on, let’s get you to bed, H,” you tell him as you stand up and reach out for him to help him to his unsteady feet. It turns out to be a little harder than you expected, but you manage to get him up from his sitting position, and throwing one of his arms over your shoulders you start to walk him up towards his bedroom.
“You fucking hate me now, don’t you?” he slurs, his other hand reaching out towards the wall to steady himself a little more.
“I don’t hate you, Harry.”
“But you think I’m a monster, right?”
“I’m not sure I know enough to think anything about you. This is a conversation we should have when you’re sober,” you suggest and he huffs.
“M’sorry for getting drunk in the middle of the night.”
“It’s alright. But I think you’ll have a mean headache in the morning,” you tease him as you finally reach the upstairs and head down the hallway towards his room.
“You’re a fucking angel, Y/N. You know that?” He just keeps talking and talking and you find it funny how different he is from his reserved and quiet self in this state.
“Am I?”
“Yeah. You are. You are so good to my daughter and to me as well… I really don’t get why your fucker ex cheated on you,” he huffs and you can’t help the smile that tugs on your lips. “What was his name? Kyle?”
“Keith,” you correct him.
“That fucker, Keith!” he spats making you laugh as you push his bedroom’s door open and walk him inside finally. “I bet he had a small dick.”
“Why does that matter,” you chuckle, making him sit on the edge of the bed.
“Because guys with small dicks are always out of touch with themselves. They think they are just better than everyone for some reason.”
“Do you have any scientific research to prove that?” you tease him as you push him down, tugging him under the covers, like a little kid.
“No, I just… know shit,” he sighs, his eyes falling closed the moment his head rests on the pillow.
“Alright. You can tell me more about what else you know when you’re sober. Now get some sleep, because you have work in the morning.”
You make sure he lies on his side as he hums his response. Reaching down you brush his messy curls out of his forehead as he breathes out harshly through his nose, probably about to fall asleep any moment.
Tapping on the screen of his phone on the nightstand you make sure that he has set up his alarm and you see the little alarm clock icon at the top bar so you are just about to walk out when you turn back around.
Seeing how he pushed so many things down inside of him, you’re not convinced he’ll be willing to give you the answers you are looking for. You’re afraid he might talk himself out and give you some kind of bullshit answer, so reaching for his phone you sneakily take his thumb and open the device, all whilst he doesn’t even move an inch.
Scrolling through his contacts you find Niall’s number and send it over to yourself before deleting the message so you leave no trail behind. You set the phone back to his nightstand and head out finally, going to bed as well, right after sending Niall a quick message.
Y/N: Hi! It’s Y/N, I got your number from Harry’s phone. Can you come by sometime tomorrow? I need to talk to you about something.
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When you come down in the morning it’s pretty obvious that even though Harry had his alarm on, he snoozed one too many times and now he is in a rush, trying to get everything done and leave on time.
“Good morning,” you greet him and Izzy upon walking into the kitchen. Harry’s head snaps up from the half-made breakfast in front of him and judging by his expression, he more or less remembers what happened last night. “Rough morning?” you ask teasing him to ease the tension.
“Uh, yeah. Woke up a little late,” he nods, finishing up Izzy’s sandwich just the way she likes, without the crust on before handing it over to her. Izzy grabs the plate and marches over to the dining table, quietly munching on her food while Harry quickly tries to make himself a coffee, but he is a hot mess, still in his night clothes when he is supposed to leave in about ten minutes.
“I’ll make you the coffee, go and get changed,” you offer, taking over the machine.
“Oh, thank you,” he nods and for a change, he doesn’t try to argue with you, he just disappears upstairs.
You make his coffee just as he likes and leave it on the counter for him before joining Izzy at the table with your own breakfast. She is babbling about how excited she is for her piano lesson today, because she’s been practicing a lot lately. When Harry appears again he is dressed for work, but still looks a little disoriented.
“Hey,” you softly say as you join him in the kitchen.
“Hey, thank you for the coffee,” he nods, moving around the kitchen.
“No problem. How are you feeling?” you ask, hoping you’re not crossing any boundaries. Harry opens his mouth to answer, but then closes, probably not sure how much he should share, though he didn’t have too much problem with that last night.
“I’m… A little hangover, but I’m… fine,” he nods shortly. “Y/N, about last night, I—“
“We can talk about it later, okay? Don’t stress about it.” You give him a reassuring smile and you can tell he is sort of relieved he doesn’t have to have this conversation right in this moment.
“Thank you.”
“No worries. And I’ll clean up in the kitchen, don’t be late,” you smile at him warmly. You can tell he wants to protest, but he also knows he is running late so he doesn’t have much choice.
“Thank you, I’ll… see you later.”
Storming over to Izzy he presses a kiss to her forehead before grabbing all his stuff and leaving.
Niall texts you back not long after breakfast that he is free to drop by when Izzy is having her piano lesson. You carry on with the morning as usual, trying your best not to dwell on everything that happened last night.
Just as Rosaline and Izzy get settled for the lesson you hear a car pulling up outside and a few moments later the doorbell rings through the house.
“Let’s get one thing straight, is it a booty call?” Niall questions right away as you let him inside.
“It’s good to see you again,” you chuckle, shaking your head at him.
“So no sex is gonna be involved?” he smirks and you know he is just teasing you.
“No, sorry to disappoint.”
“Oh, you can never disappoint me, darling,” he winks at you before walking into the kitchen to serve himself a drink. “So why did you need to see me so desperately?”
“Well, I know I shouldn’t be discussing this with you first, but I feel like I need to know some basic information that Harry might not give me so I thought you could help me out.” Niall nods as he pours himself some soda and joins you at the kitchen island, sitting on the stool next to you. “I uhh—I need to ask how much Harry shared with you about… about me—and, um what—“
“Save the stuttering, I know you two kissed,” Niall cuts you off and you breathe out in relief that you don’t have to be the one breaking him the news.
“Oh, okay,” you nod with an awkward smile. “Yeah, so that happened. And last night he and I had this conversation how we should just keep our relationship professional and all that. We both went our own way but then later I found Harry down in the entertainment room, drunk and basically having a meltdown of some sort.”
“How drunk was he?” Niall asks, knitting his eyebrows together.
“Pretty drunk. He broke a glass and he was… crying and talking about a lot of stuff.” Niall takes your words in as he inhales deeply, just nodding for you to continue. “He started telling me how sorry he was for fucking things up and he was a mess, like a huge fucking mess. Then he told me about how he shouldn’t be feeling the way he does, because he doesn’t deserve it…”
“Jesus…” Niall shakes his head, probably already knowing where this is heading.
“And then he told me that his wife’s death was his fault. That was… pretty intense.”
“I can imagine.”
“I know I have to talk to him about it, but I’m really afraid he might shake it off, but it seems like he is having some serious issues and I wouldn’t want things to get out of hands. That’s why I thought I would talk to you, maybe you know what to do or how to approach him with such a sensitive subject.”
“Yeah, I get it. It’s nice of you for being so considerate,” Niall nods, scratching his chin. “Alright, I’ll tell you what I know, but please also let him tell you if he decides to share it with you.” You nod and turn all your attention to him. “I didn’t find this out until about two months after Maggie’s death, but apparently, the night she died they had a fight. Maggie had been nagging Harry to have another baby, but he wanted to wait a little longer, until Izzy is older so they don’t have two babies at the same time. Harry said they had another big fight about it, said some pretty nasty things to each other before Maggie just stormed out to go over to her sister’s. She made it there, but… never made it back home.”
A shiver runs down your spine at the thought of how devastating it must have been, losing your partner after an intense fight without ever making up.
“Understandably, Harry completely lost his shit. For weeks he was barely functioning and we all knew he was grieving, but we didn’t know that he was blaming himself for what happened. When he wasn’t getting any better we somehow convinced him to go to therapy which luckily helped him immensely, but he stopped going a while ago. I thought he got things straight in his head about this whole Maggie situation, but I guess he is still hung up on that.”
“What about the drinking, did that happen a lot?”
“Not that I know of. I mean, yeah, he got wasted quite a few times, but only at the beginning. I don’t think you should be afraid that he might turn into an alcoholic. I think he is just really struggling right now because of the conflict he is having because of you.”
“Because of me?”
“Yeah, he is clearly very confused about his feelings for you and he has convinced himself he shouldn’t feel this way towards anyone ever, but then you came,” he chuckles softly giving you a knowing look.
“Niall, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do,” you breathe out, worry and fear slowly taking over your judgment.
“First and foremost just… be patient with him, okay? This is genuinely the first time he has taken an interest in anyone since Maggie and I think he has already taken some big steps, which is a good sign. Try to talk to him and be open, but don’t push him. I know it can be really annoying when he keeps things, but let him tell you everything at his own pace.”
You nod, understanding the importance of not rushing Harry into anything. Just because you want to get over the awkwardness of the current situation, you can’t push him over his own boundaries.
“Okay, I’ll try to do that,” you nod taking a deep breath. “Thank you, Niall.”
“Oh, and don’t let him give you the ‘you work for me, we shouldn’t be doing this’ bullshit alright? He’ll try to make it out to be some kind of business, but it’s not. He needs to get himself out there and I genuinely think you’re the right person to help him with that.”
His words touch you and you’re not even sure how to react. Niall is clearly someone who stands close to Harry and if he thinks that you and him should give it a try, that must mean something. You can only hope that Harry will come around and think the same at one point.
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Izzy gets a little fussy by the end of the day and it takes a lot of persuading to get her to bed in the evening. Harry arrived back home on his usual time and because it’s been such a hot day outside, he took her out to the pool. The problem with that is that Izzy never wants to get out of the water, so when Harry said it’s time for dinner she threw a bit of a tantrum as Harry brought her inside and her mood didn’t get any better later either.
You spent most of your night in the living room just watching TV and working on your laptop, updating your schedule for the upcoming weeks and doing some editing. Harry stays upstairs with Izzy for a long time when her bedtime comes and you figure she is still a little moody, but then you eventually hear his footsteps approaching. Harry pads his way into the living room and joins you on the couch. When you glance over at him you know he is trying to find a way to start the conversation you both know you need to have, so you put your laptop aside and turn your attention towards him.
“Y/N, I’m really sorry about last night. I’m honestly so terribly ashamed you had to… see me like that,” he starts, clearly nervous to bring it all up.
“It’s fine, happens to everyone,” you assure him and it’s the genuine truth.
“It’s not a regular occurrence, really. I usually know my limits and try to stay within them. I’m really sorry for making you uncomfortable.”
“Harry, don’t worry about it,” you tell him again with a warm smile. “We can get past it. I think what we really should talk about is… what you said. Do you remember what we talked about?” you carefully ask.
“I do…” he nods, awkward diverting his eyes away from you. “I’m sorry I told you all that in that state, I didn’t… I didn’t mean to just pour it all on you so suddenly.”
“It’s alright.” “No, it’s not,” he protests shaking his head. “I dropped a bomb on you because I couldn’t deal with my own problems the right way, and it’s not okay. So please, just… accept my apology.”
“Okay, I accept it,” you nod.
“And about the whole thing with… What I told you about Maggie…”
“Just know that you don’t have to talk about it now if you don’t want to. I’m happy to listen whenever you are ready to, but I’m not trying to push you.”
“I know and thank you for that, but I feel like… I owe you an explanation,” he admits and you nod, happy that he is willing to talk instead of closing himself off entirely. “The day Maggie died, we got into this huge fight and she ran off to her sister. It was… a whole mess, we both said things we clearly didn’t mean and I texted her, tried to get her to come home so we could talk things out. That’s when… she was on her way home when it happened and… I still feel like it was my fault.” His voice dies down at the end, just like it did last night when he was talking about her. It clearly left a deep scar on him that’s still not entirely healed and you can’t blame him.
“Everyone keeps telling me that it wasn’t, that it was just all one big coincidence, but all I can think about is that she would still be here if we didn’t get into the fight and I didn’t piss her off so much she felt the need to leave.”
“There was no way for you to see what would happen, Harry. It’s not like you did it on purpose, you had no power over the drunk driver or where Maggie chose to drive home. It really was a coincidence.”
“I know, I mean… I understand, but somehow, my mind keeps telling me that it was my fault.”
“Have you thought about… getting professional help?” you ask, trying to be polite and cautious on the topic.
“Actually, I just called my therapist today to see if… she can fit me in for some sessions,” he admits and you’re surprised at how great he is dealing with the matter. “I feel like I might need some guidance again, before things get out of my hands.”
“That’s great! It really is good to go a bit ahead of problems.”
“Yeah. About us…” he exhales nervously, his eyes meeting yours and you can tell this is the part that’s got him the most anxious. You take this as your queue to take over the conversation.
“Harry, I’m going to be honest with you,” you start and he nods, chewing on his bottom lip. “I… I have feelings for you. You haven’t been the only one making realizations,” you add with a soft chuckle, that brings a smile to his lips as well. “I know that the situation is not quite ideal, but it’s not impossible. But I just want you to be honest with me, do you have feelings for me?”
The conflict is clearer than daylight in his eyes as he is trying to figure out what to say and you really hope he isn’t gonna try to mask his feelings.
“I do,” he then admits and it’s like a giant rock has been lifted off your chest and shoulders. “It’s just… I’m not sure how to deal with it.”
“That’s alright,” you tell him. “Let’s just… take it slow. We’re not in a rush, we obviously have a lot to figure out and that’s completely fine. The pace is completely up to you, I know that you need to get a lot of things straight in your head and I can wait, okay? I’m not going anywhere, I really like where we are now and… I just hope that we can move this forward whenever you feel comfortable with it.”
Harry stares back at you for a moment like you’re some alien creature. Like what you just said wasn’t normal or even human and that’s quite heartbreaking, because somewhere along the way he managed to convince himself that he is not worthy of the most basic decency.
“I-I can’t ask you to wait around while I figure my shit out, that’s not—“
“You’re not asking me, Harry,” you smile at him softly. “This is my decision.”
His eyes are shifting between yours and he is most likely looking for any sign of doubt or qualm, but there’s none, you genuinely meant everything you said.
“So, where does this leave us?” he then asks and you shrug your shoulders.
“Everything goes on like it used to and… whenever you are ready to take a step, just… let me know.”
You can tell he is filled with questions, but he just nods with a weak smile and leaves it at that. This will be a bumpy ride, but at least you are more or less on the same page now.
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You haven’t been a big fan of birthday celebrations. You just never understood the big fuss about it, throwing a party for surviving another year? Seems a little weird. This is why you never treated this day any different.
The morning starts off as usual, only that you wake up to a few texts from friends and family, wishing you a happy birthday. Your mom has sent you a whole damn paragraph about how you made her life complete and it wouldn’t be the same without you in it. She does that every time, gets a little too sentimental about it, but you guess it’s because it reminds her of getting old herself as well, which is a sensitive topic in her book these days.
It’s a Sunday, so a day off for you. Coming downstairs you find Izzy and Harry sitting at the dining table, already having their breakfast as usual, but when she sees you, she jumps in her seat in excitement.
“Good morning, Y/N!” she beams with a wide smile, buzzing more than she usually does.
“Morning, Sunshine. Slept well?” you ask as you pour yourself some cereal and join them at the table. Izzy nods and then peeks at her father as if she is trying to hide something with him from you.
“Daddy, can we do it now?” she asks in a whisper, but it’s not quiet enough for you to not hear it.
Your eyes lock with Harry’s over the table and the butterflies in your stomach start dancing around right away when you see the tiny smirk tugging on his lips.
It’s been almost an entire week since your conversation with him and things finally seem to get in place for now. Harry had his first session with his therapist on Wednesday and though you can tell he is still trying to find his own boundaries, he doesn’t worry as much about the situation as he probably did before. He isn’t walking on eggshells around you, unsure how to act. More or less it’s the same as it was before the kiss, but there are tiny little things that still make it different. Stolen glances, lingering touches and sweet smiles are making your days more colorful now and it’s gotten you all giddy and… happy.
“What are you two plotting, huh?” you ask, pointing at them with your spoon before digging into the cereal. Izzy glances at Harry one last time and when he nods shortly, she turns to you and throws her arms in the air.
“Happy birthday, Y/N!” she cheers as Harry reaches over to the chair next to him and pulls up a box from under the table, handing it over to Izzy so she could give it to you. “This is for you!”
“You shouldn’t have gotten me anything!” you gasp, truly surprised by the gift. You were not expecting it at all.
“It’s not a birthday without gifts!” she giggles excitedly as she hands the box over. You push your cereal bowl to the side and set the gift to the table in front of you. “Open it!” she urges you, her little hands curled into fists as she watches your every move, as if it was her who just got a present.
Your eyes meet Harry’s green ones over the table once more and he is watching you with a small smile, probably enjoying that he could surprise you.
You pull on the bow on the top and then carefully take the wrapping paper off until the box is revealed underneath and you gas as soon as you realize what this is.
“Oh my God!” you breathe out in disbelief as you take a better look at the gift. Harry didn’t just get you something, he actually listened to what you were saying and remembered that you’re a big fan of oldschool cameras and you have a special love for polaroids. And now, in front of you in the box is your very own polaroid camera, something you’ve been really wanting to buy for yourself for a long time, but you just never got around to actually do it.
“Do you like it? Daddy said you’d really like it!” Izzy asks with big eyes, watching your reaction.
“Oh, I love it!” you breathe out, feeling all mushy and melted from the gesture. Izzy climbs over to your lap, hugging your neck. You wrap your arms around her in a bone crushing hug and you’re so thankful for having them both in your life.
Izzy sits on your lap as you get the camera out of the box and figure out how to work it. She then hops off your lap and poses for the first ever picture taken with your new favorite camera.
“But it’s blank!” she furrows her eyebrows when the photo comes out.
“Because you have to wait for it to develop. It’ll show up in a few minutes,” you smile, setting the photo down on the table.
Izzy sits in her seat, excitedly waiting for the photo to develop and in the meanwhile you join Harry in the kitchen where he is washing the dishes. He spots you and turns the tap off, turning to face you as he dries his hands off.
“You shouldn’t have gotten me anything,” you tell him softly, but really feel touched by the gesture.
“No, but I wanted to. Do you really like it?”
“I love it!” you chuckle in disbelief. How could he think you wouldn’t like it?!
You move forward, aiming for a hug out of instinct but then stop yourself, not wanting to cross any boundaries, but Harry notices the motion and for your surprise, he wraps you in a warm hug on his own. You melt against his hard chest, your nose buried into his shoulder as your arms circle around his waist.
When you lean back, you both keep your arms around each other, eyes meeting and you realize just how close you are to each other. Without even knowing, your gaze flickers down to his lips and you’re dying to kiss him, to feel them again, but you don’t move, wanting to keep your word about letting him set the pace.
But what you didn’t expect is Harry leaning down and capturing your lips in a sweet, innocent kiss. It’s so different from the last time, that was a hot mess, but this one… this is light as a feather but still makes your stomach somersault as you taste his lips, cupping his face in your hands.
“Daddy! I’m thirsty!” Izzy calls out from outside and it kind of ends the moment. Harry pulls back and when you look at him you see that his eyes are still closed. They flutter open a moment later, finding your gaze and you look for any kind of regret or fear in them, but they are nothing but shiny.
“Just a moment, baby!” he answers her, a small smile tugging on his lips as he leans down and pecks the corner of your mouth again before his hands fall from your waist. “Happy birthday, Y/N,” he breathes out before grabbing a bottled water and heading back to Izzy.
You bring your fingertips to your tingling lips as you take a moment to really process what just happened and you can’t push down the smile that spreads across your face. Harry finally took the first step and now you can’t wait to see what’s coming next.
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