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reticent-writer · 10 months ago

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heyyy PLEASE I NEEDD Vox x teen! Reader. Where she’s like the Vee’s assistant, or Vox’s assistant or something like that and she sees Vox as a father figure? Tyy

I like this alot

✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･**･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　

the most chaotic job in all of hell, like there is never a peaceful moment in the Vees tower. Someone is always yelling, something is always being broken, and you are in the middle of it. The peacemaker.

Your soul belongs to Vox but you assist all of the Vees. Your like 17/18. You were a hacker before you died, you hacked into the governments software and was killed for it.

You did the same thing to Vox but he didn't get mad instead he offered a secure home/job for your soul. (Seeing that everyone is dead that sounds silly but you shook his hand anyway)

If Vox isn't around to calm down Val and Velvette you're the next best thing. Valentino can talk your ears off as much as he wants and Velvette can use you as a model

In hell you can travel through electronics like Vox

Most of your time is spent with Velvette and Vox, mainly Vox. Vox has you do a lot of work that he trusts no one else with like going to the overlord meetings when no one else wants to

You are genuinely nice, like the other overlords wonder why you're working with the Vees

Your room doesn't have a door, so to get to your room you have to go through electronics to a backroom type of place. It's still in the Vees tower but no one but you or Vox and get to it.

Vox made it like this so if you wanted to be unbothered no one could even knock on your door.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚-Vox-˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

"Y/n are you awake."

You heard Vox from inside your room. You zapped you phone knowing that Vox you feel it. Basically saying you were getting up.

It took you 15 minutes to get ready before you teleported to the monitor room to find Vox watching random sinners on his big screen.

"I'm up, sir."

He dramatically spun his chair to face you.

"I hope it's been a hellish morning so far, what's on today's schedule."

You pulled out your phone and started to read off it, "the day doesn't start until 1 which is when the early talk show starts ot lasts until 3, at 5-7 is a game show, Velvette s show starts at 7, Valentino's live streaming a BDSM thing at 8, late night talk show at 10."

You looked at the time it was 8 am.

"Well since I'm free why don't we work on your mega computer." He offered. He likes how your face lit up and without wasting a second you dragged him to one of the quietest rooms in the building. In it was a desktop with a few wires connected to it.

Your mega computer was a project you started after you sold your soul. You hope it can connect to heaven one day and who is Vox to stop you.

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚-Velvette-˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

You were in Fox's monitor room untangling cords.

"Y/N COME HERE." Velvette yelled at you through her phone.

You sighed as you stopped what you were doing and turn went through one of the many TVs.

"Yes, Vel." You smiled, clearly Vox was rubbing off on you.

"Something is missing with this outfit, tell me what it is." She pointed you in the direction of a mannequin with a outfit in your preferred style.

"(￣ヘ￣）ᵁᴹᴹ a (whatever you want)."

She hummed and with a snap of her fingers it appeared.

"Better right?"

"Yes."

"Good it's yours, take it" she snapped again and the outfit was in your hands, "no go put it on, I wanna see it."

"Thank you."

"Don't thank me, put it on."

-It looked amazing-

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚-Valentino-˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

"Vox said your not aloud in the studio so the least your could do is read the script." He said as he handed you a think packed.

"Jailbird gets hard time" you read loud in disgust, "do you really think I should be reading this?"

He scoffed, "oh please it's not like I can't see your browser history. A03, wattpad, Quotev, fanfiction.net the list goes on."

You stared at him in disbelief.

"What... Aww is someone embarrassed." He squished your cheeks. Your face was beat red.

"Aw, Chiquita, I don't judge. You should see the more kinky scrips."

"Oh no thanks. I think I hear Vox calling me. Bye." You reached his pocket for his phone and with a poor you were gone.

After that you made it so no one could see any of your activity.

✿✼:*ﾟ:.｡..｡.:*･ﾟﾟ･**･ﾟﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　　

A/n: I don't like Valentino. I love his voice tho

#hazbin x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin fluff #hazbin hotel fluff #female reader #teen reader #the vees x reader #platonic #reticent writes #reticent writer

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simplydannie · 8 months ago

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Inspired by and written for @gabykatttt

Velvet and Veneer are finally released from prison.

Unfortunately, Rageous is done with them. The twins are banished leaving them to the outside world for the first time in their life.

But the anger in Velvet causes a rift, leaving the twins to separate from each other… for the first time in their life.

For their crimes in Mount Rageous, they served their time in the upper city, under their rules and regulations. The under city didn’t want them. After what they did, nearly exposing the black market that drove the income for the under city, no, Under Rageous would have nothing to do with them. They were doing them favor…. People in the under city would definitely kill them.

They were 17 when they went in. Now they were 20. Could they have served more time? Yes, but why waste the resources? Rageous decided to banish them instead. They were left at the gates of Mount Rageous, near the highway that lead out into the rest of the world. There they stood, nothing but the clothes on their backs and duffle bag in hand.

The glitz and glamour gone, faded away, Velvet and Veneer stood there as they were…their true selves. Velvet in her black skin tight mini dress, combat boots, and red hoodie. Veneer wore a similar attire, except for black skinny jeans and his signature purple beanie… a long with a smile on his face. Velvet stared at the bright lights of Mount Rageous shining through the clouds, she peeked over the highway glancing out the dark, gloom below, artificial light barely shining through: Under Rageous. She balled her fists, spitting at the city below, then threw a finger to the clouds in front of her.

“Screw you Rageous!” She screamed into the air. “I don’t need you!” Grabbing her duffle bag she marched off farther along the highway. Veneer took a moment. He stared back out Rageous…it was the only home he’d had, he’d known. But no, that wasn’t true…. His home would be wherever Velvet was, that’s all that mattered. Grabbing his duffle bag, he ran after his sister.

“Vels! Wait up!” He called out after her.

Velvet heard his annoying voice. She ignored him and kept walking. For the years they were sentenced in the Mount Rageous Detention Center, she avoided him, ignored him. He tried to reach out to her, but she refused any antic. Her legs kept moving her down the highway on the clouds, the quietness and peace of everything just allowed her thoughts to multiply.

“Vels! Why do you walk so fast-whoa!” Veneer glanced up. The further they got away from Rageous, the clearer the sky became. Veneer saw what the actual sky looked like for the first time… it wasn’t dull, but rather a beautiful dark blue. Why was it sparkly? Were those diamonds? No, he read about them before… they were called stars. As far as Veneer knew, they were the first Rageouns to set foot outside in a long time. When he came back to his senses he saw Velvet drifted farther and farther. Picking up his pace, he ran after his sister.

Velvet neared the end of the highway, the smells of the outside world were hitting her. She continued to walk with no sense of direction as she hugged herself. Velvet could hear footsteps approaching from behind.

“Vels… can you….just…. Slow down…. For a bit….” Veneer caught his breath. She rolled her eyes. Glancing back, Rageous was not just a speck…had they really walked that far. Velvet turned to face the direction ahead of her…. It separated into two roads.

“Whoa.” Veneer stated as he waked up to the tree that was at the center. It big and beautiful, leaves stemming out from the branches. It was alive, unlike the dead woods in Under Rageous. “Velvet! Look! Leaves! And…” He touched them. “They’re real! Not like the fake crap back in Rageous.”

Velvet furrowed her brow. He was to happy for his own good, and this frustrated her. How could he be so happy? They had everything, and now they have nothing. What the hell was wrong with him? He touched the giant roots stemming out of the ground, acting like it was a big joke.

“Are you kidding me right now?” She finally broke her silence after all these years. Finally, she dare speak a word to him. “Are you freaking kidding me right now?”

“What?” He gaped at her clueless. Did she not see that they were actually surrounding by living trees? That the sky was in fact out there. What was her deal?

“We’re banished from Rageous Veneer! Doesn’t that bother you one bit?” She tossed her duffle bag to the ground out of anger.

“Honestly… no not really.” He shrugged.

“Oh my gosh! And you act as of nothing still! Don’t you remember what happened those years ago! At the Rage Dome? Or are you like seriously pretending nothing ever did happen!?”

“Seriously Vels? I remember what happened clearly. I remember us nearly killing Floyd just because we wanted to be famous.” He aired quoted.

“We were famous Ven!” She screamed, her voice echoing through the wide empty world.

“Were we really?” Veneer couldn’t believe it…all these years, his sister still thought about the fame… she still longed for it. “Velvet, it was all a lie. None of it was really real because we weren’t really real. I’ll admit, it felt good for a little while…but we were living a lie. I’m happier now Vels.”

“AARRGGG!” She through her hands up in the air in frustration. “You’re such an idiot Veneer! The only reason you ever made it this far was because of me! ME! Maybe I should’ve taken that gig up on my own and left YOU to rot in Under Rageous. I still would’ve been up on top, not out here in this godforsaken place stuck with the worst, most idiotic person ever! Not to mention ungrateful. Everything I did for you Veneer! And you throw that under the bus for some stupid Troll. I wish you were never born, I wish that stupid sickness would’ve just you; save me the trouble! I HATE YOU VENEER!”

Veneer silently held back tears as her words stung his heart. “…You don’t mean that..” He said almost silently.

“I mean EVERY. SINGLE. WORD!” There was a glint of discuss and hatred in her eyes that her brother had never seen, expecially towards him. “You know what I should’ve done.” She walked straight up to him. Out of fear he backed away, stumbing and falling on top of a root of the tree that stuck out….Her shadow casing over him….

“I should’ve taken that solo gig. That’s right, they offered me a solo career. They saw potential in me. They saw how I had everyone eating out of my hands. But you know what I said…She shoved him, causing him to fall off the root and onto the ground. “I said no! I said no because of you! You stupid, stupid, idiot! I said no because I was thinking of you! And this is how you repay me!”

Veneer clenched his hands into fist as he stood up to face her…She was still taller than him…and she always would be.

“I was thinking of you to Velvet! You were going crazy! You didn’t see what I saw that day at the Rage Dome! It’s like I wasn’t even looking at my sister! I was staring at some evil, greedy monster. A shell of what you were! You were going crazy, something about that Trolls essence was making you loose your mind Vels! I couldn’t risk it. I was afraid of loosing you!” he finally confessed. All these years…he shouldve told her why he did what he did. Yes, it was because of nearly killing Floyd, but it was also the fact that he saw a madness in Velvet that day, a madness that truly put fear in his heart. But judging by the look she was giving him…she didn’t believe him, she didn’t believe him, or she didn’t care.

“Didn’t want to loose me huh?” She walked back and picked up her duffle bag. “You did the moment you opened your stupid big mouth.” She began walking down the left road. Veneer quickly went over to pick up his bag and began to follow her. Velvet turned around and violently pushed him to the ground again. “DONT YOU DARE FOLLOW ME! WE’RE DONE VENEER! GROW UP AND GET OUT OF MY SIGHT! I NEVER. EVER. EVER. EVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN!” She screamed, her breathing heavy out of anger.

“Vels…You…You don’t mean that…”He said softly again, tears coming to his eyes.

“GO AWAY! GET OUT OF HERE BEFORE I SERIOUSLY HURT YOU! JUST LIKE YOU’VE HURT ME! YOU’RE DEAD TO ME VENEER!” She kicked dirt in his face before walking away from him.

“Vels.” He called out as he still sat on the ground. “VELS!” He screamed. He scrambled to his feet trying to pick up his bag. Veneer was distraught, hurt, lost, he stubbled step after step, continueing to fall down to the ground, tears stining his eyes. “VELS!” Her figure grow smaller and smaller the farther she walked, the farther she got away from him. His vision blurred as tears began running down his eyes.

His heart began racing as the loneliness set in….his anixety taking control of his body as his breathing heavied and his heart pace quickened. He scrambled back near the roots of the tree and hugged his knees. If he got up now, he could still catch up to her… he could still fix…but he felt that no matter what, Velvet was done with him, seriously done. Three years ago at the Rage Dome, he didn’t want to loose….but he did, he lost her…she hated him.

Burying his face into his knees he began to cry; they echoed into the cold night. Slowly he began to accept that he was truly alone now, that Velvet was done with him. Where could he go? He was banished from Rageous, Velvet would continue to turn him away or abadon him somewhere worse…Perhaps he should continue walking until…

“Oh!” He lifted his tear stricken face away from his knees. He grabbed his duffle bag and began digging around for them….the letters he would write to Floyd. Veneer had placed them into a box he made while at the Detention Center. They were denied visitors, but the little Troll continued to write to Veneer in those three years of isolation…Velvet would never respond to her letters. He shuffled and went through every single one, until he came upon the letter he was looking for:

Veneer,

So glad to hear you guys will be getting out soon! Since you’re free now, how about a visit to Pop Troll Village? Poppy and the rest agreed that a visit would be okay, even healing for all of us. Write to me as soon as you guys plan to head over so we can have things prepared! Don’t know where to go? Don’t worry, I attached a map I made during my travels. I really hope to see you guys again one day. I wonder how much you’ve matured, it’s been what, three years?

Hope to hear from you soon buddy,

Floyd.

Veneer turned over the letter to find the map that connected Ragous to the location of Pop Troll Village. He swallowed the lump in his throat. He didn’t know what to expect out there. This world was completely new to him. Unlike that “nature” in Rageous, it was alive. Perhaps though, unlinet the Rageous Woods, it wasn’t as dangerous? He only hoped, and there was only one way for him to find out. Veneer stood up, swung his duffle bag over his shoulder, and began walking oppostite from the road Velvet walked down. He was half way down when he suddenly stopped. Veneer turned to the direction his sister walked off too, tears slwoly coming back.

“Good-bye, Vels….Good luck….Love you sis.” He murmured wiping his tears away….He made his treck towards Pop Troll Village.

…to be continued (?)

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elegantshapeshifter · 3 months ago

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Steven Dillon's conversion to Christianity: what does it mean to Hellenism and Pagan Community?

Steven Dillon, the author of "The Case for Polytheism" and "Pagan Portals - Polytheism: A Platonic Approach", recently returned to Christianity.

This event made me think a lot. I think this event can teach us that the more you are concerned with "the One" and you think it can respond, the more likely you will go towards monotheism.

The point is that "the One" is us, and is "a thing", not "somebody".

The One is not a person. This is the reason why we worship the Gods, they are persons.

The One, the All, is so big that the idea that it can listen is nonsense.

Monotheism emerges when you think the entire universe can listen to you. Polytheism is the humbleness to understand that only certain parts of the Universe can listen to you.

And when you think you are talking to the One you are always actually talking to a part of it.

This is the reason why Christ, Yahweh, Allah, etc. are parts of the One and not the One.

Even attempts to interact with the entirety of the One are just interactions with parts of the One, ie one of the many Gods.

This is confirmed by Aleister Crowley's experience, we can read from the Liber Astarte Vel Berylli that he considered Allah, Christ and Yahweh as Parts or Aspects of the One, exactly as other Polytheistic Deities, and not as the All/the One in its entirety:

"Let the devotee consider well that […] Christ and Osiris be one […]".

"As for Deities with whose nature no Image is compatible, let them be worshipped in an empty shrine. Such are Brahma, and Allah. Also some postcaptivity conceptions of Jehovah".

"[…] the particular Deity be himself savage and relentless; as Jehovah or Kali."

Moreover, Dillon was (is?) Platonic, and the problem is even worse, because sadly the reaction to the problem of evil is very similar between Platonism and Christianity.

However, the Stoic (and maybe the Hindu and Buddhist) worldview completely destroys the problem of evil, because if the Divine is good and we simply don't perceive the goodness and that is what evil is, ie ignorance or misperception, then the problem of evil is solved.

If we, instead, perceive the evil as something real and the Gods as totally good not evil, the problem of evil remains.

Finally, a Pagan that comes back to Christianity usually doesn't know history very well, and is unaware of Natib Qadish, ie Modern Canaanite Religion or Neopaganism.

If you listen to Natib Qadish (ie Canaanite and Israelite Polytheistic Neopaganism) and Wathanism (Arabian pre-Islamic Polytheistic Neopaganism) practitioners' voices, you cannot come back to Christianity.

In fact, Christianity doesn't make any sense: Yahweh is a Storm God that comes from Edom to Israel through the Kenites or Shasu, which were nomads. His name meant "to blow", and so he was a variation of Baal Hadad.

In the origin, El was the father of Baal/Yahweh, and his sister was Anat and his mother Asherah. Later, El ie the Sky God and Yahweh ie the Storm God, merged and so Yahweh was seen as the husband of the Goddess Asherah.

In fact in Kuntillet Arjud it's possible to see blessings by "Yahweh and his Asherah". Moreover, even the Bible (read The Book of Judges) witness that people worshipped Asherah/Astarte and Baal together with YHWH.

In Elephantine in Egypt there was a Jewish temple for Yahu-Anat, ie both Anat and YHWH.

So how can Jesus be the son of the only God Yahweh if Yahweh was never a monotheistic God before the Josiah's reform that made Judaism monotheistic?

If Judaism is originally polytheistic then Christianity makes no sense.

By reading the "Cycle of Baal" we'll discover the origin of the Biblical Deity (or Deities?).

youtube

I end my dissertation with some interesting quotes from the Bible:

Jeremiah 7:

"17 Do you not see what they are doing in the towns of Judah and in the streets of Jerusalem? 18 The children gather wood, the fathers light the fire, and the women knead the dough and make cakes to offer to the Queen of Heaven."

Jeremiah 44:

"17 We will certainly do everything we said we would: We will burn incense to the Queen of Heaven and will pour out drink offerings to her just as we and our ancestors, our kings and our officials did in the towns of Judah and in the streets of Jerusalem. At that time we had plenty of food and were well off and suffered no harm. 18 But ever since we stopped burning incense to the Queen of Heaven and pouring out drink offerings to her, we have had nothing and have been perishing by sword and famine.”

"19 The women added, “When we burned incense to the Queen of Heaven and poured out drink offerings to her, did not our husbands know that we were making cakes impressed with her image and pouring out drink offerings to her?”"

"25 This is what the Lord Almighty, the God of Israel, says: You and your wives have done what you said you would do when you promised, ‘We will certainly carry out the vows we made to burn incense and pour out drink offerings to the Queen of Heaven.’"

#Hellenism #Paganism #Polytheism #devotional polytheism #Christianity #Canaanite #Platonism #Neoplatonism #Natib Qadish #Youtube

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diogenesz2020portugal · 8 months ago

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Szia! Ne haragudj, h ismeretlenül zaklatlak, de hétfőn Lisszabonba megyek a családommal, és szeretnélek megkérdezni, szted mi az amit feltétlen látni kell/ki kell próbálni/meg kell kóstolni stb. Lesz velem egy 7 éves, szóval ezt is figyelembe véve 😀 Nagyon köszönöm!

Olá @vedernagyur!

Én azt szoktam mondani, hogy Lisszabonban eltévedni a legjobb. Alfama bája felejthetetlen, számomra roppant kedves kis utcákkal rendelkezik. A Bairro Alto ugyanez, nappal teljesen más, mint éjszaka. Napközben szinte kihaltak az utcák, este viszont megtelik élettel (bár egy új szabályozás szerint este 11 után nem lehet az utcán inni). Ahol mi szeretünk enni, az a túlparton van, Casilhas-ban, ahová komppal lehet átmenni. Mindjárt a casilhasi kompállomás mellett jobbra van egy olyan étterem, amit jobbára helyiek látogatnak. Ennek megfelelően elég szakadtnak néz ki, de az ételek - ha szeretitek a tengeri herkentyűket - nagyon finomak. Én soha nem hagyom ki a hallevest, ami szerintem utolérhetetlen. Az adagok bőségesek. A halleves sajnos nem. Az étterem neve Restaurante de Farol (https://www.restaurantefarol.com/) Cascais-ba HÉV-vel lehet kimenni (a Cais do Sodré-ról indul) a végállomáson kell leszállni. A két kicsi strandja nagyon cuki (az egyik az állomás közelében található, a másikhoz, ahol egy óriáskerék is van, kicsit sétálni kell. Onnan érdemes kicsit tovább is menni, Van egy kedves kis öböl egy világítótoronnyal, remek fotótéma. Még messzebb a part mentén telálható a Boca do Inferno (a Pokol Szája), ahol nagy hullámok esetén szintén szép képeket lehet készíteni. Cascais-ból autóbusszal lehet továbbmenni Cabo da Roca-hoz (a kontinens legnyugatibb pontjához), ahol a nagy semmit lehet megtekinteni, de én imádom. Kb. fél órás buszút, a baloldalon érdemes ülni, gyönyörű onnan az óceán. Alfama-t is érdemes megnézni, itt két szép kilátó is van egymás mellett: a Miradouro de Portas do Sol és a Miradouro da Santa Luzia. Pompás kilátás nyílik a folyóra. A Cais do Sodré-n található a Time Out (az egyik fele piac, a másik sok kis étterem egy nagy közös evőhellyel. Itt kapható a város egyik legjobb fagyija is. Én a bazsalikomosat szeretem a legjobban. Híres hely még Belém, ahol a Torre de Belém, a Padrão dos Descobrimentos (Felfedezők emlékműve), a Mosteiro dos Jerónimos található, az utóbbitól nincs messze a Pastéis de Belém cukrászda, ahol az ikonikus süteményt lehet megkóstolni. Sintra is kihagyhatatlan az útikönyvek szerint, sok park és palota van ott. Az én kedvencem a lenti, 1000 éves alapokon álló régi királyi palota (Palácio Nacional de Sintra). Ha strandolni van kedvetek, megtehetitek Cascaisban, ahol védett öböl van, alig hullámzik az óceán. Ha nagy hullámokat szeretnétek, akkor Costa da Caparica lehet a célpont. Igaz, ilyenkor a víz még hideg, most 17 fokos.

Még 2 fontos dolog:

1. Mindenképpen érdemes kényelmes cipőben jönni.

2. A repülőtéren, ha lementek a metróba, odalent lehet "jegyet" váltani. Itt elektronikus jegyek vannak, értelemszerű lesz, hogy hol kell érvényesíteni. A metróból kijönni a jegy használatával lehet (ilyenkor természetesen nem von le pénzt). Nektek a Zapping-ot ajánlanám, azzal nem kell figyelnetek, hol ér véget az ún. belváros, és kb. 50 km-es körben bárhova jó. Annyival töltitek fel, amennyivel akarjátok. Egy út kicsit több, mint 1,60 euró. A metróról-metróra való átszállásnál nem kell külön érvényesíteni, nagyjából egy órás utazásra érvényes. Van ugyan Lisboa Card is, de az 24 órára 27 euróba kerül, igaz, pár múzeumba ingyenes belépést biztosít, de gőzöm sincs melyikbe lehet bemenni vele. 72 órára 54 euró.

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sonic-fankid-showdown · 5 months ago

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Poll 5, Round 2.

About Wraith: (by @sonic-polis) Wraith is a 17 year old theater kid who has probably quoted Hamlet to his confused dads multiple times. He's especially close with Shadow, and he helps him with the cat shelter that Shadow runs in the AU he comes from. Despite being the kid of the Ultimate Lifeform and one of the strongest people on the planet, he's not very powerful, but that's okay with him. The bracelets on his wrists are not limiters, just normal bracelets. He always has something in his mouth, usually a blue raspberry lollipop. His favorite things are Shakespeare, cats, costume/set design, deep fried twinkies and his best friends, River and Comet.

About Vel: (by @sonicnewschannel) Vel is a professional Extreme Gear Racer! She loved the feeling of wind in her hair as a kid whenever her dad (Sonic) would run around with her, but she wasn't born with super speed, so instead she turned to Extreme Gear. Now, she's a professional, and a staple in the community! Her papa (Antoine) gets concerned easily about her, but he knows she can take care of herself. She doesn't handle surprises well, and likes to plan for any situation she can think of!

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brabblesblog · 1 year ago

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Ch 17: Whom have I in heaven but thee?

Astarion has ascended, and she has stayed with him. Life in the Crimson Palace isn’t as idyllic as it seems. Is there a chance for their relationship to go back to how it was? Or is it too late for the Ascendant and his consort?

This series is about Ban, my Tav, and the Vampire Ascendant. Will be angst and smut, with sprinkles of fluff.

This fic is a softer take on Ascendant!Astarion and of the changes he undergoes after the rite. Can Ban handle the change, and if a chance came, would she choose to run? And can the Ascendant win her back in time? Inspired by the concept of vampire wives and that IGN interview with Larian that discussed the ascension.

Professionally edited by @editing-by-night

Astarion and Ban are presented with an opportunity whilst visiting the former Shadow-Cursed lands.

Read on AO3.

Masterlist.

Moonrise Towers.

Still empty but less dour, the old crumbling walls looked less threatening and more desolate than anything else. Seeing the sun shine on the facade felt wrong-

A nudge, and Ban shook off the thought.

“Are you alright, love?” Her husband stood beside her, wearing one of his older shirts - one from before. Astarion had packed clothes he’d worn during their adventure, shirts and trousers that had not seen the light of day in months before this.

“I’m not risking any of my actual clothes, Ban.” Astarion stuffed the old clothing into his pack haphazardly.

She tried not to laugh as he made an attempt to close the now-bulging pack and failed.

“You do know you needn’t bring so many shirts, right? It’s just Reithwin and the surrounding area.”

He stared at the pack, frowning. Living in the Crimson Palace meant an abundant if not limitless amount of clothes; he’d become accustomed to changing on a whim. Conceding the point, he dumped the contents of the bag out, picking through the small mountain of clothing that spilled out.

“I suppose so,” he grumbled, “I’ll just have to subsist on a meager variety of shirts then. Pity.”

Pulling her mind out of her reverie, Ban shrugged. Was she alright?

So many memories they’d created here, good and bad alike. Sometimes it was still hard to reconcile the fact that she shared those memories with the man next to her, not with some nebulous phantom of him.

Astarion marked the silence; he saw her turn away, expression closing off.

“Ban.” His voice was tense, but not excessively so. He took her hand, threading his fingers through hers. “Let’s just head inside, love.”

He led her through, eyes scanning ahead to avoid any potentially dangerous spots. He’d done this back in the early days too, scouting ahead for traps and ambushes. Ban wasn’t the most observant sort; he’d found out early on that she needed protecting.

Funny, that. He had thought he was using her for protection, but had quickly found himself wanting to shield her from danger in return. His eyes had always sought her out in battle, shooting at anything that dared approach; just as she’d cut down anything that had tried to get to him.

Initially, it had been to ensure she wouldn’t fall to a stray arrow or an errant sword. It wouldn’t have done to have their leader die, leaving no one by his side when Cazador inevitably came for him, would it? As the days had passed, however, he’d begun to have to repeat this fact to himself, reminding his heart that petty affection - even love, gods forbid - wasn’t the reason, here. Obviously, that plan had failed miserably.

Pushing Ban away that day in Vel’s mansion had been instinctive, a reflex that hadn’t warranted a second thought.

“Ban-” He pointed, but it was a little late. Her boot snagged on a piece of broken stone; she toppled forward and Astarion braced, catching her effortlessly.

“You seriously have to pay closer attention,” he chided, but there was no anger there; just amusement and a little nostalgia. He held her close, allowing himself to revel in her presence.

“Sorry,” Ban said automatically. She let him wrap his arms around her, head pressed against his shoulder as her mind drifted back.

"You- ... you're incredible. You deserve something real. I want us to be something real."

Memories. They shouldn’t be painful, and yet they stung. She turned her face to hide from the world, from him; unwilling to admit that she was still mourning, grieving a life that never came to pass.

Astarion felt her tense, muscles shifting as though preparing for a fight. He sighed, part of him wishing to confront her. The larger part decided to wait for a better moment.

He pulled away, pretending to miss her tears. He kissed her forehead.

“No need to apologize, darling,” he murmured, “Just missed a rock. Which - well, you do do that a little too often for my liking, but -”

She smacked him, melancholy forgotten for the moment. With a satisfied smirk, Astarion continued leading her through the ruin.

They arrived at the table where Araj had set up shop. Astarion ran his fingers across the wood. He could smell it even now, the drow’s blood - rank and vile and alien. Ban had shown him he was more than just a thing to be used then, that his choices mattered. He had never forgotten.

“That was interesting, the drow,” he mused. “A pity she’s dead, or I would’ve had her brought to the palace and killed her myself.”

“Astarion,” Ban said, a little leery of the tone his voice had taken.

He paused, hand stilling against the wooden grain of the table, meeting her eyes. “Oh, not literally. Can’t I say something in jest, Ban? I didn’t kill her when we saw her at her shop, did I? In fact, I like to think I was positively polite.”

A small smile broke across Ban’s features. It was difficult at times, figuring out what was a joke with him and what was not. She knew that in some ways, it wasn’t even he who changed, but rather her perception of him; something she’d been working on, but she admittedly still had a ways to go.

Astarion exhaled. He took a step towards her, hands held out. He was still worried, fearing the day she’d shy away from his touch yet again. But she let him take her hands, and just like every time she did, he felt a wave of relief.

Bracing himself, he met her gaze.

“Can we talk, Ban? Tonight,” he murmured, swallowing down the urge to avoid it altogether. After that confrontation the first day they’d arrived at Halsin’s community, Astarion had felt a lot more willing to be open around his wife. He could sense Ban trying to do the same, though her doubts still seemed to linger; he had resolved to fix that.

“I… of course,” she said, worry crossing her expression.

He squeezed her hands. “It’s nothing big, nothing that will change things,” he reassured her. And at least on his end, he was resolved that it would hold true.

Ban stared at him for a moment. In these ruins and in those clothes, Astarion looked exactly like he had back then, down to the soft expression on his face and the slight, uncertain curl of his lips. The sight was comforting, and she nodded.

“Tonight, then.”

With that said, Astarion led her further into the ruins of Moonrise Towers.

Having played with the children after dinner, Ban headed back to their little hut. She opened the door to find Astarion on the bed, shirtless; his hands were behind his head, and he was staring out the window.

“Do you ever think of choosing him?” he asked, not meeting her gaze.

“Choosing-” She frowned, then realized what he meant. “Halsin. Choosing Halsin.” She gestured at the hut they were staying in. A calm, quiet existence; days spent playing with the children and nights wrapped up in Halsin’s warm embrace. She could not say she hadn't thought of it.

Astarion’s eyes slid back to Ban. He watched her, a hand moving down to tap his knee absently. Waiting.

“Perhaps,” Ban finally said, “It would have been a peaceful life.”

“Happier,” Astarion corrected, still staring at her intently, eyes tense. His lean body lounged on the bed in a well-practiced position that suggested nothing but nonchalance.

“Okay. Happier.” She crossed her arms. “What of it? Is this… is this what you wanted to talk about?”

There was a small twist in the calm of his features; he forced himself to ease off. “It’s one of several, but yes,” he returned to the topic at hand, “If you want. Should you want - still want that.”

Say it.

He drew a deep breath. The hand tapping his knee stilled, the manufactured pose disappearing under rapidly tensing limbs; he readjusted, sitting up.

“If you still want Halsin-“

His voice cracked, the depth of his emotion proving too much. Hurt, a little anger. Fear.

His eyes tried to convey what he could not say; his mind reached for hers, and she allowed him in.

Thoughts. Images. Ban dancing with the children, riding on Halsin’s broad back. Smiling. Doing chores. Running in the woods. Carefree; happy.

Astarion quirked an eyebrow at her, and let his emotions suffuse the images.

The first thing Ban felt was a wave of jealousy - he wanted Ban to save those smiles for him, and him alone. This wave, however, was miniscule compared to the weight of his envy; Astarion was sickened to imagine her with Halsin, but he also wished to be the one running in the woods with her, making love on the forest floor - to be the one she lived such a simple, carefree life with.

Ban was ready to snap, to ask him what the point of this exercise was when the color of his emotions changed. There was more, more to him that he wished for her to discover.

See me, he thought, opening his heart, pouring it out before her waiting gaze.

Joy, at seeing her happiness. Contentment, knowing that she finally had what he so longed to give her. And the deepest one of all - resignation, knowing it wasn’t him who’d been able to give it to her. Not soon enough.

“Do you understand?” he asked. He couldn’t bring himself to say it, but he could at least show her.

“You’re saying you’ll let me go.” Ban was disbelieving.

Astarion barely believed it himself. But he’d seen her with Halsin, seen how easily she laughed in his presence; how she effortlessly allowed him into her space.

Astarion thought he and Ban were getting there, but a part of him wondered if it wasn’t just better to save her the trouble. He looked away. In his breast, his heart raged in a blind panic.

Take that back, you fucking idiot! You’re throwing everything away!

He felt her hand on his shoulder and looked up, surprised.

“I want to be with you,” she said.

“What? Why?” Familiar words; he found himself wistful at the memory. “I’m hard work, Ban. You know that.”

He took the hand on his shoulder and brought it to his lips.

“It is.” She tried to meet his gaze, but he kept his eyes firmly on her hand.

“It sure is worth it, though,” Ban added, “I still choose you.”

Astarion merely nodded, for once speechless; he tugged at her hand, drawing her to the bed alongside him.

“Thank you,” he said quietly, “I needed to hear that.”

She nuzzled into the crook of his neck, and he braced himself for the next thing he was about to say.

“Ban. I want to know… what’s on your mind. What’s been on your mind for a while now.”

“Nothing? We’ve been happy, no?” she immediately deflected, but Astarion shook his head.

“Better than before, certainly. Happy? I wouldn’t use that word. Not on your end, at least.” His eyes stared forward, boring holes into the wall of the hut. “If you seemed happy, Ban, I wouldn’t have asked you about Halsin. I would-”

His jaw worked, tightening. “I wouldn’t be so worried.”

She could feel his chest rise and fall faster, fear breaking through the facade he was trying so hard to maintain.

“I didn’t want to hurt you. Scare you,” Ban ventured cautiously. But she now recognized that in doing so, in shielding him from the truth, she had inadvertently caused the very thing she’d been trying to avoid.

Astarion laughed, a short and pained bark of noise. “You think I don’t see how you look at me? Most of the time you don’t anymore, thank the gods, but sometimes, Ban - you look at me the way you used to. After.”

After the ascension. When he had begun to lose her, bit by painful bit.

“I don’t mean to,” she said. She drew away from him, just enough to see the hard lines of his face and the way his eyes refused to look anywhere but the wall. “Astarion, please. Look at me.”

Astarion acquiesced after a moment of hesitation; their gazes met. For a heartbeat his eyes were glassy and distant, but then they shifted, becoming wide and round. The uncertainty was plain to see; he no longer made any effort to hide it when it was just the two of them.

As vulnerable as it made him, he knew it was necessary. If she couldn’t do it, he would have to, no matter how much he loathed it. For her. For them.

“I still mourn what our life could’ve been if you didn’t ascend,” she admitted, “Brief flashes of memory, small flickers of pain here and there. A lot less often now, but still there at times.”

“Do you still see two different people?” A question he hadn’t dared ask since the night she’d decided to move back in.

“No,” she said with certainty, “I merely still grieve what we could have been - a different future, not a different person.”

He absorbed her words, understood them. A moment passed while he gathered his resolve.

“I know we said it would take time,” he finally said, “And I am… willing to wait. But can I ask for one thing?”

She frowned, biting her lip - unsure. He saw it, and a wave of hurt washed over him.

“See.” Astarion pointed out, smiling sadly. “That’s exactly what I mean, Ban. You’re doing it right now.”

“Doing what?” Her tone was a little too harsh, and she winced. “Just tell me. Don’t hint at it and expect me to know.”

“You don’t tell me how you really feel. You close yourself off, like you did after the rite. You just disappear, and your face goes blank. Empty. I-” He shook his head. “I’m terrified of it, Ban.”

She considered his words, painfully aware that he’d hit the nail on the head. In moments when she felt wary of him she hid away, an almost involuntary response drilled into her during those months between the rite and her flight. Perhaps even before Astarion came into my life, Ban mused, but didn’t allow herself to dwell on those… thoughts.

“You’re not wrong.” Ban weighed her words. “It’s… almost just instinct, Astarion. I get nervous when I can’t read you, and it makes me want to run and hide.”

Astarion breathed out heavily, eyes falling shut. “Can you do this for me, then? One thing. When it happens… tell me. Ask me what I’m feeling. What I’m thinking. If I can’t tell you, I’ll show you.”

He took her hand, relieved when she let him without question or resistance. He placed it gently over his heart.

“I know I haven’t been kind, especially those six months. But if we are to fix this - us,” he added, trying to blink away the moisture gathering in his eyes. “I need you to at least try to talk to me, that’s all. If you’re frightened of me, then that’s alright. If you want time to yourself, then so be it. I would just prefer to know your thoughts, and wish to have mine be heard in return.”

His eyes opened again; they were a little bright and wet, and he fixed her with yet another smile. He aimed for hopeful; it came out tremulous. “It’s the least you can do to help your husband out, don’t you think, darling?”

A small attempt at lightening the situation, but one they needed at present.

“Of course,” she nodded. “I think I can at least do that.”

His face brightened. “That’s all I ask.”

Astarion’s hand cupped her cheek, and he leaned in to press his lips against hers. It was a gentle, unhurried meeting of mouths; he let her in, allowing her to taste him.

“Ban. While you were with those damnable children,” he murmured, laughing a little as he pulled away from the kiss, the tips of his ears flushing pink before he proceeded. “Halsin gave me a, ah… a present.”

“You?” she laughed, incredulous.

“Well, for us. He apologized for what happened - and yes, it was an actual apology this time, mind you.” He looked smug, and although Ban doubted the veracity of his claim, she didn’t contest it.

Astarion slipped a hand under the pillow at his back, pulling out a small package.

“I don’t know if you’ll like it, and I don’t presume to know what exactly you and Halsin did when you were together, but-”

He unwrapped the package, revealing a whittled cock.

Ban stared.

She stared for such a long time that Astarion began to worry.

“We don’t- look.” He began to wrap it back up, but Ban grasped his wrist to stop him.

“I could do it,” she offered, “But I don’t have any experience in that location, and I’d rather have it be you if it’s in-”

He couldn’t help the laugh that burst out of him; he quickly grabbed her for a kiss, affection overwhelming him.

“Ban,” he said slowly, each word dripping from his lips, “If I wanted to fuck you in the ass, I’d do it with my cock.”

She shivered at his words; Astarion smirked, smugly pleased.

“This isn’t for you, darling.”

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vel17 · 4 months ago

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#vel 17

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sapphicstarwars · 1 year ago

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Sapphic Star Wars is hosting a ship tournament to highlight sapphic rarepairs, and we would like to hear from YOU! Let us know if there are any rarepairs we have missed that you would like to see included (current list under the cut)!

Our rarepair list was sourced from our ever growing collection of all sapphic sw ships found here, then narrowed down to everything that has between 1-50 fics on AO3 (by the wonderful @livelaughleia).

To add a ship, comment it on this post or send us an ask! This interest check will close in one week (December 20) and the tournament will begin in February! @swfandomevents

All characters are implied to be of age during their relationship. This list is meant to be comprehensive and not pass moral judgment.

Ahsoka Tano / Steela Gerrera (26)

Ahsoka Tano / The Armorer (21)

Ahsoka Tano / Morgan Elsbeth (4)

Ahsoka Tano / Trace Martez (41)

Ahsoka Tano / Shin Hati (15)

Ahsoka Tano / Reva Sevander (0)

Bazine Netal / Phasma (14)

Bix Caleen / Cinta Kaz (1)

Bo-Katan Kryze / Breha Organa (0)

Bo-Katan Kryze / Fennec Shand (12)

Bo-Katan Kryze / Koska Reeves (29)

Bo-Katan Kryze / Padmé Amidala (1)

Bo-Katan Kryze / Sabine Wren (1)

Bo-Katan Kryze / Ursa Wren (37)

Chelli Lona Aphra / Hera Syndulla (1)

Chelli Lona Aphra / Magna Tolvan (26)

Chelli Lona Aphra / Sana Starros (16)

Depa Billaba / Adi Gallia (4)

Depa Billaba / Shaak Ti (3)

Elia Kane / Dedra Meero (2)

Elia Kane / Koska Reeves (3)

Elia Kane / Karyn Faro (1)

Enfys Nest / Ahsoka Tano (4)

Enfys Nest / Fennec Shand (1)

Enfys Nest / Leia Organa (6)

Fennec Shand / The Armorer (6)

Fennec Shand / Drash (5)

Fennec Shand / Leia Organa (13)

Fennec Shand / Garsa Fwip (12)

Fennec Shand / Koska Reeves (5)

Jordanna Sparkburn / Sylvestri Yarrow (5)

Juhani / Bastila Shan (5)

Juhani / Belaya (19)

Juhani / F!Revan (20)

Jyn Erso / Ahsoka Tano (3)

Jyn Erso / Mon Mothma (15)

Jyn Erso / Sabine Wren (5)

Karé Kun / Jessika Pava (20)

Kaydel Ko Connix / Jessika Pava (23)

Kaydel Ko Connix / Paige Tico (17)

Kleya Marki / Cinta Kaz (2)

Kleya Marki / Mon Mothma (4)

Kleya Marki / Vel Sartha (2)

Lana Beniko / Jaesa Willsaam (1)

Latts Razzi / Asajj Ventress (5)

Leia Organa / Evaan Verlaine (47)

Leia Organa / Hera Syndulla (3)

Leia Organa / Sabine Wren (28)

Leia Organa / Sana Starros (2)

Luminara Unduli / Asajj Ventress (3)

Mara Jade / Leia Organa (29)

Matthea Cathley / Oliviah Zeveron (3)

Merrin / Mosey Cimarron (8)

Merrin / Trilla Suduri (22)

Mon Mothma / Breha Organa (8)

Mon Mothma / Hera Syndulla (1)

Mon Mothma / Tynnra Pamlo (2)

Oola / Leia Organa (15)

Padmé Amidala / Aayla Secura (26)

Padmé Amidala / Beru Whitesun (7)

Padmé Amidala / Breha Organa (13)

Padmé Amidala / Dormé (14)

Padmé Amidala / Mon Mothma (9)

Padmé Amidala / Satine Kryze (46)

Peet Deretalia / Jessika Pava (2)

Phasma / Nastia Unamo (28)

Qi'ra / Ahsoka Tano (12)

Qi'ra / Amilyn Holdo (4)

Qi'ra / Enfys Nest (22)

Qi'ra / Jyn Erso (11)

Qi'ra / Leia Organa (11)

Qi'ra / Rey (5)

Qi'ra / Sana Starros (1)

Rae Sloane / Adea Rite (4)

Rae Sloane / Chelli Lona Aphra (1)

Rae Sloane / Elia Kane (1)

Rae Sloane / Hera Syndulla (1)

Rae Sloane / Karyn Faro (2)

Rae Sloane / Phasma (1)

Reva Sevander / Trilla Suduri (4)

Reva Sevander / Tala Durith (1)

F!Revan / Meetra Surik (8)

Rook Kast / Barriss Offee (1)

Rook Kast / Bo-Katan Kryze (3)

Saché / Yané (15)

Shaak Ti / Luminara Unduli (14)

Shara Bey / Evaan Verlaine (2)

Shara Bey / Jyn Erso (3)

Shara Bey / Leia Organa (11)

Trilla Suduri / Merrin (24)

Vette / Jaesa Willsaam (29)

Visas Marr / The Jedi Exile (17)

Visas Marr / Brianna (4)

Visas Marr / Mira (6)

Yana Ro / Kor Plouth (6)

Yana Ro / Shea Ganandra (1)

Zeen Mrala / Lula Talisola (17)

Zorii Bliss / Bazine Netal (1)

Zorii Bliss / Jannah (6)

Zorii Bliss / Rey (23)

#sapphic star wars #star wars wlw #fandom polls #poll tournament #star wars events #the mandalorian #swr #the clone wars #ahsoka #the book of boba fett #the high republic #knights of the old republic #star wars legends #rebels #star wars femslash #expanded universe #admin post #bo katan kryze

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