#ut is a bit ugly here but we love him anyways

[sp00ky9]

More doodles I forgot to post… my bad yall

[tony-is-my-daddy]

Dream a little dream of me pt2

The weather was bad, it was getting a bit cold at the middle of October now, but Peter and his little students were outside on the playground. He was pushing one of the youngest little boys in the swing who couldn't do it by himself yet, while watching over the rest of the children around him so no one would get hurt. Of course, you wouldn't think a class of fifteen kids was a lot to look after, but honestly, even looking after one was a challenge for some people.

It was nice, though, the kids were slowly starting to go home with their parents, even the little boy who he was swinging, and after a while, it was just him and Morgan. It was strange, Morgan was usually one of the first kids to be taken home.

"Hey princess. Who's coming for you today," he asked as he sat down next to the little girl who sat on a bench, swinging her legs that couldn't reach the ground.

"Eric..."

Peter frowned. "Who's Eric?"

"My new dad. I don't wike him too much."

Oh. "Your mommy has a new boyfriend?"

"Yes he's gunna be my new dad."

"Well, when did you meet him?"

"Last week..."

"That's a very little tiny short time," Peter said, his thumb and index finger almost touching as he showed how small he meant to the girl. "Why don't you wait until you get to know him better? Maybe you will like him."

"But I wanted you to be my new dad..."

His heart skipped a beat at that. "Now now, Morgan, daddy told you not to talk about this, right?"

"Right... sorry."

"It's okay, bub. Just be nice to Eric, okay? You can't be sure what he's like if you don't know him yet."

"Otay."

Just then, someone walked through the gate, a tall, broad man with black hair and brown eyes. He smiled when he spotted Morgan on the bench.

"Hi Morgan! I'm so sorry for being late, it won't happen again, I promise," he said as he walked over to her and Peter. "Hi um I'm sorry, this won't be a regular occasion, traffic was just a nightmare," he explained to Peter this time. "Eric."

"Peter. It's okay, I gladly spend my whole day with this little angel, ain't that right, Morgan?" The little girl giggled as Peter pinched her cheek. "Alright, now go home with Eric, bub."

"Goodbye, Mr. Parker," she said as she jumped off the bench.

"Bye bye Morgan!"

Morgan and Eric walked out and got in a car, leaving Peter alone on the school grounds. He sighed as he looked around, the playground that was a few minutes ago full of screaming children now so lifeless. It was scary and he didn't like being there without the kids, so he went back to his classroom where he collected all of his belongings. He checked his phone before leaving and saw a message from Tony.

Tony: Ready for tonight?

Peter: Not yet, just got out of work

Tony: You're still beautiful

Peter: Don't make me blush

Tony: ;)

It was Friday again, almost a week after their first date, and now they were going on a second. Peter was so excited about having their second date now, since he very much enjoyed their first one. It all still seemed so surreal, him dating Tony Stark, texting him every single day and seeing him occasionally when he came to get Morgan. He loved it, of course, but he wouldn't be surprised if this all were just some kind of fever dream or a bad joke. Though be prayed for it not to be.

When he got home, he laid down for a while, opening up his chat with Tony again as he put something on for background noise on the TV.

Peter: What should I wear?

Tony: ?

Peter: This is a fancy place

Tony: Not that fancy

Peter: Fancier than what a kindergarten teacher is used to

Peter: So what should I wear?

Tony: I'll be wearing a suit and tie, if that helps

Peter: Then we should match

Tony: You're adorable

Peter: I know :)

Tony: Literally everything you wear will look amazing on you because EVERYTHING LOOKS FUCKING AMAZING WHEN YOU WEAR IT

Peter: You say that because you haven't seen me in my lazy sunday attire yet XD

Tony: What does that look like?

Peter: A shirt that's 3 sizes big on me and sweatpants

Peter: And ugly glasses

Tony: I wear ugly glasses too

Tony: But that's even worse since I wear them because I'm old as fuck

Peter: You're only 10 years older than me

Tony: I'd like to point out that you have daddy issues but then that would seem like I'm not glad that you do so I'll just keep quiet

Peter: Shut up and get dressed XD

Tony: Alright, see you in a bit ;)

God, he loved their banter.

During the past week, they really spoke every single day, for the first two days Tony texted him first, and then Peter got brave enough to text first as well. They got to know each other more, they told each other about their traumas and families - Peter about that one aunt that he still had and loved, and Tony about his dad and mom, then his closest friends who he counted as family. Peter now also knew that Tony loved old school rock, cheeseburgers and liked to work on old cars in his free time, that he went to MIT and graduated early with perfect grades. Tony knew about how much Peter loved to cook and that he loved pets, especially cats, and he was really into the 50's and 60's songs, that he was a nerd back in school and he was part of the decathlon team.

So basically, now they knew a shit ton of things about each other, even just after a week. It was crazy, they wouldn't stop talking to each other, it was like they were fifteen years old in love again.

As Peter's mind was wandering back to Tony and to how amazing of a person he was, he slowly began to get ready for their date. He chose one of his two suits (wow, what a great job) and a baby blue tie that looked good with the light grey. He got dressed, gelled his hair back, and he was ready to go. Thankfully, not long after that Tony texted, saying he's just leaving his place. Peter waited until the doorbell rung again and this time, he let Tony in. There was nothing wrong in letting the man look around, right?

"Hey Tones," Peter greeted when he opened his door for the man. "Come on in, I just have to put on my jacket and my shoes and we can go."

Tony walked in and looked around the small kitchen and dining space. He peeked through the archway to the living room as well, then hummed. "Living cozy up here, I see."

"Very," Peter chuckled. "That's what the landlord said when I was looking around the place as well, I assume because the best was to describe a small ass apartment is ‘cozy’." Tony laughed at that.

"Well it might be small but it's very homey. I like it a lot." The older man leaned over to look at the succulents that stood in a perfect line on his windowsill. "I like the plants."

"Oh there's a lot of them in here, most of them I keep in the living room. Wanna check them out?"

"Yeah sure-" he looked at his watch, "oh wow, maybe not now. We're gonna be late for our reservation."

"Oh sorry, yes, let's go," he said as he pulled up the zipper on his jacket.

They went to a modern place which looked super expensive, but Tony assured him that ut wasn't actually. They sat down at a nice little table for two, a romantic candle lit between the two of them at the center of it. Everything looked so nice and Peter was so excited. They ordered their dinner and began eating as soon as the waiter brought it to them. They were both very hungry already.

"How do you like it," Tony asked.

"Oh it's absolutely amazing. How's yours?"

"Good. I think my mamma made it better, though."

Peter's eyes widened. "Your... mamma?"

"Yeah, my mother used to cook a lot of italian dishes that she learned from my grandmother. She always said that italian food was the best kind of food in the world."

"Wow, I didn't know that."

Tony smirked. "You also didn't know I was half italian."

"No way!"

"Yep."

When they got back from the date to Peter's place, it was already quite late, yet it seemed too early to let the man leave just yet. Peter desperately looked around his house to find something, anything, that could make the older man want to stay for a bit more.

"Hey, I have some leftover wine. It's not Chardonnay or anything like that, but... if you wanna stay for a while and drink some then I think... I wouldn't be very opposed to that."

Tony smirked. "Well how can I say no when you're asking so nicely?"

They took of their jackets, shoes and blazers and Peter grabbed two glasses and the bottle on their way to the living room. They sat down on the couch and started drinking. Tony was looking around the place, the stairs behind Peter's desk catching his eyes and he finally looked up to see a loft bedroom.

"You actually sleep up there?"

Peter laughed. "Yeah, I do."

"There's no walls, aren't you scared of falling off?"

"There's fencing up there, Tones. See, all around the flooring."

"And where's your bed?"

"Oh I don't have a bed. I have a mattress on the floor."

"What the fuck?!"

"Yeah, I mean, it didn't seem like a good idea to have that old hardwood flooring hold up not just my weight but also a bed's weight. So I thought a mattress would be enough. It's actually quite nice up there, I have lots of plants."

"Yeah, and if you come home drunk you might break a leg on your way to your... mattress."

"That's why I mever drink until I get drunk."

They discussed Peter's living situations for some time, and when they finally stopped talking for a minute or two, Tony looked at his watch.

"It's late, isn's it," Peter asked.

"Almost midnight."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to keep you here for so long."

"No, it's fine. I didn't really... wanna leave anyway."

Peter smiled, looking away from the older man's eyes shyly. "You know, if it's already so late... and you had a lot of wine now, maybe... it wouldn't be a great idea to drive home."

"Peter Parker, are you asking me to sleep over?"

He glanced up at the older man through his thick lashes. "Would that be okay?"

Tony put the glass half full of wine down on the coffe table and leaned in to capture Peter's lips in a soft kiss. "It would be more than okay," he breathed when they pulled away. Peter grinned from ear to ear and he pulled Tony back in for another kiss by his tie, this one deeper, more passionate than the one before. They ended up making out for about ten minutes on the couch, Peter's arms around Tony's neck and his legs in Tony's lap, the man's arms wrapped around his body and hands stroking his back. It was perfect. Sexy. Until Peter forgot that he still had a glass of wine in his hand and spilled it all over the back of Tony's shirt.

Tony, of course, forgave him, but it definitely killed the vibes. Tony's dress shirt ended up soaking in the sink while the two of them fell asleep, cuddling on Peter's mattress.

After that great second date, Peter invited Tony over on Tuesday the next week to bake a pumpkin pie together. Yes, it was a lame idea for a third date but it was his turn to finally ask Tony out, and he didn't really want to go anywhere, he just wanted to stay in his apartment, bake a pie and maybe cuddle with Tony under a blanket afterwards. Let a man dream!

Tony didn't seem to have any problems with the idea and on Tuesday, after both of their shift was over, he went over to Peter's.

"Hey! So great to see you again," Peter greeted him with a kiss.

"You saw me yesterday night when we FaceTimed," Tony said.

"Yeah, but that was on FaceTime, it's not the same. Come on, get undressed and we can get to it. I hope you're ready for cutting it open because I can't do that."

"Are you serious," Tony chuckled.

"Don't laugh at me! Just help."

No, Peter was obviously not serious. Cutting a pumpkin open was difficult, but he could've done it if he wanted to. But then he wouldn't have seen Tony roll up his sleeves and his biceps flex as he cut the pumpkin open, which would've been a shame. God, the man was so damn hot...

They cut the pumpkin and cooked it for a while for the filling while they made the pie crust together. It was such a great thing to do together, Peter enjoyed it, to be honest, more than he enjoyed their other dates. He loved cooking and spending time with Tony, mixing the two together only made things that much better.

"It says lightly floured hands, Tony," Peter yelled. "You don't have to take a handful of flour!"

"Oh I know what the recipe says, this isn't for the dough. I just thought maybe I could return that you ruined my favorite shirt last weekend." He wiggled his eyebrows while not taking his eyes off Peter.

"Nooo, no no no no, I said I was sorry!" But it was too late. His date threw the handful of flour at him, covering his shirt (he wasn't wearing an apron because he only had one and gave it to Tony, God damn it!) and even a little bit of his neck and chin.

"Yeah, that's what you get," Tony laughed wholeheartedly, his entire body shaking with his genuine laughter. It was adorable, honestly, and if Peter wasn't covered in flour, he would've smiled at how sweet Tony's laughter was.

"You're a meanie! That wine thing was an accident but this wasn't," he said like he meant it, but honestly, he was enjoying it a bit as well.

"Oh, I'm sorry my dear." The older man cupped his face with his floury hands and kissed him. Peter completely forgot about what happened for a minute, but then Tony's hand slipped into his hair, ruffling it so that the flour got everywhere.

They pulled away from the kiss, Tony grinning widely while Peter tried to mask his own smile and look angry. "White looks so good on you, baby."

"Oh yeah? Let's see it on you!" Peter reached into the flour bowl as well and the next thing Tony saw was him blowing the little white particles at him, he had just

enough time to close his eyes before they hit his face. "Aww, so amazing," the younger man laughed, rubbing the flour into his date's beard.

"You're so immature."

"You started this!"

While they fought over who was more childish, constantly throwing more and more flour at each other until there was barely any more left, they almost overcooked the pumpkin and they made no progress with the crust. Tony also told Peter that he was a terrible cook, which started out another playfight between them until they were wrestling on the dirty kitchen tiles, laughing and screaming as they fought for dominance. The older man ended up on top of Peter, straddling his hips while holding one of his wrists in each hand to stop him from fighting. Their laughter soon died off and Tony leaned down to kiss Peter, the kiss tasted like flour, but it didn't matter.

"I forget why I came here now," Tony joked.

"I wanted to bake a nice pie with my boyfriend, but nooo, you just had to ruin it," Peter said, laughing through the sentence and he wouldn't have noticed what he said if it wasn't for the smile on Tony's face changing into pure shock. "Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I- that was so wrong, I know we've only had two dates so far and we never even talked about where this whole thing was going. I'm sorry for being so forward, I wasn't thinking."

"You really think about me like that?" Tony's head tilted to the side slightly, like an adorable curious puppy's. And Peter would've commented on that if it wasn't for how nervous he felt at that moment. He swallowed thickly, his mouth suddenly very dry.

"Well..."

"Because, you know, I've never... felt this way with anyone before." Tony finally let go of his wrists and scooted off his hips to sit on the tile, now Peter sitting up as well to face him.

"Me neither..."

"It's so weird, I mean, we really haven't spent much time together but this whole thing feels so... natural."

"It does, doesn't it?" He felt so relieved. He wasn't the only one feeling that way! "I mean, talking to you is just so easy and I really like it. You make me happy."

"You make me feel like I'm twenty-something again," Tony joked and Peter smiled slightly, pushing at the man's shoulder. "No, seriously now, you make me feel young, happy, whole. I have never ever felt that before with anyone, and you... like, this is literally our third date and look at us!"

Peter laughed out loud now. "Where are we going with all this, Tones?"

"I think... I think it's a bold move, but how about we just become official?"

"You mean like actual boyfriends?"

"Yeah! I mean, what could go wrong? We both want this and we seem to perfectly match!"

"It's kinda early though, aren't you scared?"

"Hella fucking scared. It's like bungee jumping off a cliff. But everyone who's been bungee jumping and didn't die say it was an amazing experience."

"And what if we die?"

"Then... we'll know not to bungee jump again."

Peter chuckled. "So... boyfriends?"

"Boyfriends." He crawled into Tony's lap and kissed him again, this time it lasted longer. Their first kiss as an actual couple, and it happened nowhere else, but on Peter's dirty kitchen tiles while they were both covered in flour and who knows what else. And the pie was long forgotten.

Tony invited Peter over to his house as well. He said he'd seen Peter's multiple times while Peter had never seen his. So Tony drove him over to the Stark Tower and they went all the way up to the penthouse at the top of the huge building. On their way, they ran into Pepper as well, who greeted Peter with a big smile and told him that Tony had said a lot about him already. Peter was happy and Tony was blushing, but no one saw that (Peter did see it).

When they got up to the penthouse, Peter's jaw dropped to the floor. The living room itself was bigger than Peter's whole apartment and probably just the furniture costed more than his rent.

"Wow, this place was probably a chick magnet," he noted as he walked through the living room.

"It was but it doesn't work anymore. Now I just use it to amaze beautiful doe-eyed teachers with it."

"Well, it fucking works. This place looks great, Tony!"

"I'm glad you like it." His boyfriend stepped up behind him, wrapping his arms around his middle. "You know, it's definitely bigger than your... cozy apartment. And it has a bed. A king sized one, actually, that can fit the two of us perfectly."

"What are you saying, babe?"

The older man started peppering kisses on Peter's shoulder and up his neck, making him shiver. "Well, you could spend some more time here, you know. It has a nice working area, a big kitchen where you can cook whatever you want, and I have Netfix, Hulu and Disney+. It's a real dream, you know."

"Tony, babe, this is very nice of you but what if Morgan will get confused? I mean, she already wants me to be her dad-"

The kisses stopped. "She does?"

Peter mentally smacked his own head. "Uh... she might've been saying things to me about that ever since you first asked me out."

"Wow. She never told me about that. I mean, she asked about how you were when I told her I met you again, but nothing about... that."

Peter turned around in Tony's arm to face the slightly taller man. "On the first day Eric came to pick her up, she was all gloomy because she said she wanted me to be her new dad. And she once gave me a drawing where he drew Pepper, herself and you and me."

"Well, maybe that's a sign then?"

He frowned. "What kind of sign would that be?"

"If Morgan likes you then we really were meant to be. If everything's going so smoothly then maybe the universe is trying to tell us that we belong together."

Peter smiled, leaning his head against Tony's chest. "I want this all, Tony. I really do. But I'm so scared something will go wrong," he whispered.

Tony pushed his chin up with his fingers to make Peter look into his beautiful dark brown eyes. "Let's not worry about the future just yet. Let yourself fall, baby, I'm here to catch you, okay?" Peter nodded, and Tony pulled him into a sweet, loving kiss.

The kiss turned into making out, and then soon enough, hands were roaming bodies and their kisses grew more and more hungry. Tony pulled Peter upstairs into the master bedroom where they settled on the king sized bed, clothes flying off and touches becoming bolder, until they were completely naked.

And they made love. It was amazing, better than any sex they've had before, it was sweet, sensual, passionate, loving, and their bodies fit together so perfectly. After reaching their climax together, they laid in each other's embrace for a while, breathing heavy as they recovered from such an amazing orgasm. And those three little words were so close to slipping from Peter's mouth, but he wasn't gonna say it. Not just yet. But someday.

Someday...

[creative-poptart]

Hello! This is my first time sending a request and I’m hoping that I made it in on time! I was wondering if I could request some headcanons of UT, UF, US, and HT Sans with a Crush that loves to draw them! They mostly do it without the boys’ knowledge, but that’s usually because they want to capture genuine emotions from them, not posed. Thank you for any consideration! Happy writings! (Also, if you could confirm that you got this in anyway, I’d love that, even if I didn’t make it on time)

No worries, Anon, you made it in on time! I’ve been taking quite a break, but I’m going to try and get some asks answered!

UT Sans/Vanilla: Bold of you to assume that he doesn’t already know that you’re up to something when you tote your sketchbook around all the time. In all honesty, Vanilla doesn’t really care too much about what you want to do with your spare time, but it is a genuine surprise when you show him that you’ve been sketching him the whole time. He doesn’t really see himself as model material, so when you show him the sketches and doodles, he’s genuinely taken aback. That’s not to say that he hates it, he just doesn’t think that he’s worthy of being your muse for any length of time. That being said, part of this goof wants to make sure that you have something nice to look at, so once he’s aware, he’ll try to give you funny poses. If you want him to stop, just tell Vanilla, and he will.

“all that we know is that this old bag of bones is somehow a muse for you. that’s one small thing we didn’t know for a long time.” 

UF Sans/Red: Whereas Vanilla might be more aware of what’s going on, Red doesn’t pay too much attention to what you’re up to. Sure, he knows that you’re doodling something on that sketchpad of yours, but he has no idea what is ending up on that paper. Luckily enough for you, though, he ends up sitting still for hours on end, which makes your sketching process a lot more streamlined. He won’t mind that you want to have something to draw if you do end up showing him your works. However, it definitely flusters the absolute heck out of him so that he’s blushing like mad, but he won’t really complain. Red’s touched that you chose him twice: once when you said yes to him when he asked if you would date him, and when you chose him as your muse. 

“you really wanna try ‘n’ draw my ugly mug all over ya pretty notepad? there ain’t nothin’ stoppin’ ya, sweetheart, but don’ expect me t’ know why ya doin’ it.”

US Sans/Blue: The other skeletons on this list are far more self-conscious about their appearances, Red with his scars and Vanilla with his general low self-esteem. This is most certainly not the case with Blue, since he prides himself on being immaculately dressed and cleaned. Sure, he’s got a lot of issues with how others feel about him being more childish, but so long as you don’t make him look like one, he’s ecstatic. He will want to pose for everything that you want to draw, so finding a way to catch him off guard is going to be tricky. Your best bet is to be a fast artist because otherwise, you won’t be able to finish it without him moving out of the way. Blue’s best poses are going to actually be when he’s asleep, and he won’t be moving nearly as much.

“I TRULY AM HONORED THAT YOU WANT TO DRAW ME!! IS IT SO BAD THAT I WOULD LIKE A HEROIC POSE FOR YOUR AMAZING ARTWORK?”

HT Sans/Axe: For the most part, Axe hates being seen and absolutely abhors how he looks because of his skull. Your art is going to fly under the radar since he really won’t be able to stop you too much or remember what it is you’re drawing. The whole time you’re drawing, he’s more than happy to stay by your side and snooze, or just cuddle up to you while you’re working. When you show him what you’ve been working on, he’ll definitely be taken aback that you want to have him on your sketches. You’re going to have to be very gentle in telling him what you plan on doing with said drawing. Axe doesn’t want to have too many pictures of himself, since he doesn’t like how he looks, but your art is something this boy loves seeing, so he’ll probably keep it for a bit. 

“there’s really no reason to keep this here, so... you can keep it, but can we get it a frame or something where it won’t be seen too much?”

Thanks for the ask, Anon!

[vanityloves]

anyways im gonna listen to/read the fuckin...rise of the ogre shit bc ive been putting it off 🪓🥴 im gonna put stuff under the cut bc im gonna be TALKING n dont wanna make a new post everytime

piss

ok he performed for 2 pounds 50. which is basically $3 today i- well it was absolutely a power play on his father behalf that also had the promise of money so.

also lol he said Rejection fueled my ambitions which, yknow,, i already knew but it still hurts and i will continue to talk ab it xoxo

AH HELP. "...if ebay had been invented at the time he would've sold me online there and then,"

"man hands on misery to man, yknow"

THEN PROCEEDS TO CONNECT IT TO MUSIC/HIS CAREER. this man said :) the one thing i truly have a passion for. the one thing i fucking like.

oh yeah. bullied by students AND teachers.

oh god hes 42ish during this interview? ok.

the fuckin school bully saying he wouldve acted differently if he knew what hed become

getting called "faceache", then proceeds to call 2d that. jfc he really does just repeat what everyone says. really "treating others how i was treated/how they treat me"

maybe thats why? hes kinder to fans? bc :] you support me and like me so, ok ill return that energy

MURDOC GETTING HIS ASS BEAT N PARADING HOME LIKE WELL I WON BC 'I PISSED YOU OFF' SJDJD

a real rowdy boy. absolute nasty boy. fraud and arson... shooting ppls windows with his air pistols

black sabbath being a huge inspiration? fucking absolutely.

became a satanist n shit at age 16? "it fitted me like a glove" "heavy metal and devil worshipping became my favorite past times" ajsj funny that ppl in trying times often seek religion or following of some sort

heavy metal being his favorite, n loving the clash, while hannibals was more punk based

hannibal breaking murdocs nose for the 2nd and 3rd time for playing his music on hannibals turntable

he doesnt sound that bitter? ab hannibal? he doesnt sound incredibly fond but he talks ab how he got him into a lot of music. so, i imagine they we're a bit closer than i thought?

international baccalaureate in antisocial? anthropology?

MURDOC IS ACTUALLY SMART HE WAS JUST. NOT INTERESTED IN THE SUBJECTS? I GUESS? (also,,, he literally Built cyborg noodle and i think he had a PhD too lol. but its always nice to hear hes actually...yknow, interested or good at other things)

alright but murdoc having a fascination w/ other cultures - or at least some interests, that lead him to actually study the damn subject and "pass with flying colors"

'fuck college though. im gonna be a rockstar'

he sold his soul at 18ish? whenever the fuck he got kicked out but college was mentioned so my brain goes to 18ish idk

he lived with his father still and paid rent via low paying jobs one including 'part time dressing as santa'

help he was ab to take a Personal Job for quick cash and uhh well, "still made me call him sir though" he really said 20 dollars is 20 dollars, huh "that story was totally true"

alright, 1997,,,

2d stuff

loves zombie stuff? thats really cute, and is freaked out by the way they move. god he rambles

both he and murdoc are horses in the chinese zodiac

[[jfc ok if the official shit compares them a lot i understand why ppl ship them but Dont. its a narrative foil and that doesnt always mean Romance jfc.]]

SUMTHINK.

truly... a lil stinker. super cute bouncing baby and a "bit thick" which is stull so endearing to me. hes just a happy man!

excitable 10 year old and would dance around his room

jfc the fact he has normal/caring parents. i kinda forget how opposite hes supposed to be from murdoc but i think thats another thing jsjsysg (murdoc said why isnt my tragic story making me famous why does he get to be the Star. no wonder he acts like a loon)

i still dont get how gettin bonked by a tree branch made him go bald and also turn his hair blue

big tiddy nurse mommy,,,

went to the same school as The Cure and got decent grades despite hittin the noggin quite hard. WANTED TO BE A STORM CHASER... OMG??

oh thats really cute, hed bond with his dad by building keyboards toegther 🥺💕

messed around with paints and graffiti? artistic king

MURDOC AGAIN: QHDJ 'VILLANOUS' GANG HELP

oh yeah d day...new instruments, new band, new singer - and 'had to be the best or no dice' and absolutely CONFIDENT that his songs were bangers ajsjd

but on that same note, had absolute faith (or desperate) in 2d which i love

ransacked the fucking music shop jdjdj and 2d said he was Just Standing There behind the counter the whole shift hdhdh

"thats when your eye came out, yeah" "yeah!-" HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND SO HAPPY AB IT ?? yes he said ut hurt but he sounds...ok

jfc murdoc ragdolling this poor mf around. dunking him and slapping him around. actually? so incredibly terrible and abusive and i hate him for that 🔫 im sorry 2d stans. we dont condone that behavior here ong.

how and why the FUCK did 2d's parents allow that fucker near their child after that i??? help. wtf. his moms a nurse why didnt she just have murdoc sit in plain view of other people. god damn.

2d flying out the window n hitting the curb "whoops"

"just two black holes...[ah] it looked great...a blue hair, blacked eyed GOD- the girls would go wild-" "pretty boy looks" ???? HELP. HE DOESNT GO LIGHT ON THE COMPLIMENTS, HUH

RUSS TIME

oh yeah, he straight up kiddnapped this man help. idk how he managed that, russ is a Big Man??

AND MURDOCS MUSIC WAS SO FUCKING SEXY GOOD that russel said hm alright ill stay, :] out ifbhis owm free will im screaming.

"oh this is one of them febreeze commercials" "uh . yeah sure. *murdoc turning on his Sick Tunes*" but that either means? it was just his guitar playing the convinced russ? unless he and 2d recorded sumn?

"2d was the looks, murdoc the brains, then russel truly was the heart"

'while 2d and murdoc liked music, this man was a MUSICIAN' god fucking bless this book holy shit ny man russ getting some respect. he said back hurts from carrying this band.

murdoc basically heard this guy had big trauma that gave him So Many Skills n said "thats what i want" ok idk thats actually really? inch rest ting to me. seems that murdocs fine handing out compliments but i guess that where his charisma really helps out yeah?

"he was going to be in my band whether he liked it or not" ...murdoc-

HELP. 2D IS LIKE BRO GO ON IM LISTENING 🥺 despite hearing the story 50-60 times and murdoc said fuck off you lil shit.

ok irrelevant but i love his voice! its super comforting n nice to listen to 🥺

HELP MURDOCS SO BITTER. "NOTHING THAT HAPPENS TO US IS NORMAL" WELL YEAH. THIS IS TRAUMA CENTRAL.

idk how/why he sucked up all his friends souls though ... how are they all possessing the same person. they said "its my turn on The Russ"

DELL IS HIS ACTUAL, LITERAL SOULMATE...KING...😭

went to a private school,,, and was already possessed? and the thing where he gets bigger and smaller is a reoccurring thing?

was in a coma for 4 years?

hiphop machine...time and history...the ultimate set i guess.

his knowledge was infinite and hes a "Renaissance man" hes so fucking smart our king. jack of all trades but a master of drums. he said i know im good and what of it

PAULA.

HELP. HE RMBRS THE STALL: CUBICAL NUMBER 3 🥴 IF I DO RECALL 🤤

yes russel our king. fuck up his nose 5 more times. probably stunted his growth too. he shrunk after russ gave him a wallop im sure

why dies paula sound like tracer overwatch

also only dated 2d for 2 months before joining the band?

HELP SHE REALLY WAS THE FIRST MURDOC FUCKER: "but when i saw murdoc with his thick greasy hair, green teeth and yellow skin i thought 'oh this is the ine for me!'" "OH HES SUCH A DANDY-" HELP ME IM HQJDHD

sick in the head...like i want to hurt people help girl. shes fucking Crazy. but she rly said damn i didnt hear back from him again 😭 and my purse is gone JSHHD

MURDOC: SHE WAS DEPRESSINGLY UGLY *still fucked her*

NOODLE TIME

"small japanese person!"

2d: we werent gorillaz until noodle arrived!

im dying the reason he chose gorillaz. 'swinging through the jungle baring my ass'

noodle really said "im just happy to be here" and she balanced everyone out 😭 "she gave off pure love and the fact that she could laugh at murdoc REALLY helped too" RUSS... IS BABY

JFC MURDOCS SO FUCKING CONFIDENT IN THIS BAND IM LIVING FOR THAT. HE SAID YOU WANT US SO BAD IT MAKES YOU LOOK STUPID. THE CHARISMA

2d rambling ab some girl he met and "ssSs" "whats the s stand for hawhaw" "i dont know!".

THE RECORD LABEL GUY.

one song is all it took i ❤ good for them

just murdoc talking ab the party that they threw for thier deal and saying "you dont know how much of a dick i felt like [when carrying one of those huge checks]" like oh thats whatll make you a dick? alright.

A FOOD FIGHT THAT WENT SO HARD THAT IT KNOCKED 2DS TONSILS OUT? WHAT THE FUCK

ahshdj damon and murdoc not getting along bc of Rival Band One Uppery + damon calling murdocs cuban heels crap since ge wore steel ones with gold spurs.

MURDOC FEELIN EMBARRASSED BC HES 'QUITE PROUD OF HIS SHOES'

but the band and damon getting over music and their ambitions and became a "paternal figure"

HELP MURDOC SAID AWIOGA @ RACHEL WHICH MADE HER THROW HER DRINK IN HIS FACE AND SPLIT FROM 2D. kinda sad actually, she said i still like 2d but murdoc kinda ruined it by trying to get it in with me, it put a strain in our relationship :/ oh god murdocs That Dude

nov 31 1998: started recording :]

40 tracks that got cut down to 15 holy shit

KONG STUDIOS 🤲

hooking up cameras in every room ejdjsu

webby artist of the year in 2006? holy shit

noodle learning ab kong studios omfg

JFC. YES I KNEW KONG WAS BUILT ON/IN A CEMETERY BUT I DIDNT KNOW PPL FOR THE FUCKING PLAGUE WHERE THROWN THERE HDJD

built in 1739?

the ghost of the first owners ghost still roams around in the kitchen in the early hours and moans 'aaa glass of water'

theres some rotting bullshit near the studios and in the summer its fucking TERRIBLE

the former owners were a biker gang, and they all died in a fire

murdoc said this place has bad vibes. i want it.

grim weather

the building feels impossible to escape from huHgg

[theliberaltony]

via Politics – FiveThirtyEight

Welcome to FiveThirtyEight’s weekly politics chat. The transcript below has been lightly edited.

sarahf (Sarah Frostenson, politics editor): Last Thursday in an interview with The New York Times, Republican Rep. Steve King of Iowa said, “White nationalist, white supremacist, Western civilization — how did that language become offensive? Why did I sit in classes teaching me about the merits of our history and our civilization?”

The uproar over King’s comments came swiftly, and there have even been calls for his resignation. On Monday, King was booted by GOP leadership from his House committee assignments, and on Tuesday, the House overwhelmingly passed a resolution condemning white nationalism and white supremacy (even though it didn’t rebuke him specifically.)

All of this raises a question (two questions, actually):

King has a long of history of making racist comments and aligning himself with white supremacist causes, so why are congressional Republicans taking action only now?

And are Republicans opening themselves up to criticism for not similarly condemning President Trump’s racist comments?

julia_azari (Julia Azari, political science professor at Marquette University and FiveThirtyEight contributor): My answer to No. 1 is that typically this kind of action (stripping committee assignments) is related to some kind of scandal (money laundering, sexual harassment) and not just offensive views.

More generally, American politics has not really figured out what we do with racism. (My residence on understatement island is becoming more permanent.)

sarahf: So the fact that King lost his committee tenure because his views were offensive is pretty unusual?

julia_azari: Yes. I don’t have an exhaustive list, but, I mean, Jesse Helms was in Congress less than 20 years ago, and he was known for “racially charged” comments and ran one of the most notorious race-based ads of all time — but I don’t think he faced any formal consequences.

nrakich (Nathaniel Rakich, elections analyst): I’m a bit baffled by the timing. There are a few different theories floating around — like King being electorally weaker now than he’s ever been (he even got a primary challenger), or Republicans being in the minority for the first time in a while — but I’m not totally convinced of any of them.

Probably the most convincing point I’ve seen came from Jane Coaston at Vox, who pointed out that King used to be seen as a kingmaker in Iowa politics (especially in presidential primaries) and a way for other Republicans to validate themselves as tough on immigration.

But that may not true anymore. There’s (probably) not going to be a competitive GOP presidential primary in 2020, and Trump has now arguably become the GOP kingmaker on immigration.

perry (Perry Bacon Jr., senior writer): The actual words King used, “white nationalist, “white supremacist” were unusually politically problematic. Trump avoids that kind of language, even as he implies all of the same things. Also, the media started pressing Republicans on this, and that put them in a tough spot.

nrakich: Perry, King made a just-as-bad comment (in my view, anyway) in 2013, when he said that undocumented immigrants who came to the U.S. as children have “got calves the size of cantaloupes because they’re hauling 75 pounds of marijuana across the desert.” But nobody did anything then.

Although it does seem that King was getting himself into hot water more frequently in the 2018 election cycle. And Republicans probably thought doing anything about it before the election was not politically palatable.

julia_azari: There’s a needle being threaded here: People (thinking VERY broadly about the electorate) don’t like overt racism and ugliness, but they also don’t respond well to serious challenges to the racial status quo.

sarahf: So do we think this continues to spiral and that GOP leaders in Congress ask King to resign?

A number of Republicans have begun to call for his resignation, including Sen. Mitt Romney and Rep. Chris Stewart of Utah and Rep. Liz Cheney of Wyoming.

nrakich: King’s local newspaper also called on him to resign.

julia_azari: They endorsed his opponent, though.

perry: Elected Republicans can call for him to resign all they want, but unless people and entities like Fox News, Ann Coulter, Rush Limbaugh and Trump turn on King, then I don’t think this dynamic changes.

The next step here is for King to really lean hard into the idea that he is being prosecuted by the “political correctness” police, the media and the progressive left — playing the victim card against the forces of multiculturalism is powerful on the right. I would argue that it helped get Trump elected. I’m not sure King is done, unless he resigns.

sarahf: I have to say I’m a little surprised that “political correctness” hasn’t become a big part of the national conversation yet.

nrakich: Perry, last week, I was also skeptical that King’s political career was in any danger. But now that he’s been stripped of his assignment on the Agriculture Committee, which is a big deal in his district, don’t you think that makes it a lot more likely that his primary opponent (state Sen. Randy Feenstra) could actually win?

perry: I don’t know much about his primary opponent, but in general, I would not want to run as a Republican candidate aligned with the people trying to take down King for being too willing to defend “Western civilization.”

nrakich: That’s very much not the tack Feenstra is taking. He’s a hardcore conservative himself, but he argues King’s controversies have made him ineffective. In an impressive bit of needle-threading, Feenstra says people should vote for him because he’s the one who will advance Trump’s agenda most effectively.

julia_azari: One question, which I don’t know how to answer, is whether some critical number of voters who don’t like political correctness also don’t like white supremacy (lots of people hold conflicting views). It may be that the last couple of years — Charlottesville in 2017, Pittsburgh in October 2018 — have tipped the balance of them toward thinking that the latter (white supremacism) is more dangerous than the former (political correctness).

Given King’s 2018 performance — he won re-election by only a few percentage points — it wouldn’t necessarily have to be a lot of people in his district to make a difference.

perry: Like if King paints his GOP primary opponent as a pawn of the media or elites trying to take him down, that would be smart politics.

One obvious shift: Before the 2018 election, the GOP had to worry about every seat. There was a chance Republicans would wind up with a one-seat majority or even a five-seat majority. If that were the case, I don’t think they would be attacking King in this way.

nrakich: Yeah, good point.

perry: Now that they are in the minority, it’s easier to purge the most controversial members.

sarahf: So you really think some of the timing of this is related to the fact that the comments were made after the election?

perry: Totally.

Nothing to lose now — they might have needed King’s seat before. Now, I think he is likely to lose in the general election in 2020. So Republicans have some incentive to dump him and try to field a better candidate for the general.

julia_azari: Yes, I agree with this assessment.

nrakich: See, I think that reasoning is flawed.

The 2018 midterm election was a historically great year for Democrats … and King still won by 3 points. King probably isn’t in electoral danger in 2020 unless it’s at least as good of a year for Democrats.

That said, I think congressional Republicans might agree with your assessment and that’s why they’re nudging him out.

julia_azari: So did King run ahead or behind people in comparable districts?

I’m guessing behind.

nrakich: Yes, Julia, you’re right. Last month, I did an analysis of 2018’s strongest and weakest incumbents, comparing how each incumbent “should” have performed based on their district’s partisan lean, elasticity and the national popular vote vs. how they actually performed.

King was one of the weaker incumbents; he did 10 points worse than we would have predicted.

Steve King was a weak incumbent

The 10 Senate and House incumbents who underperformed by the most in the 2018 elections*

Incumbent Party State or District Expected Margin† Actual Margin Net Incumbency Advantage Elizabeth Warren D MA D+39 D+24 -15 Chris Collins R NY-27 R+13 R+0 -13 Sheldon Whitehouse D RI D+36 D+23 -12 Mia Love R UT-4 R+12 D+0 -12 David Cicilline D RI-1 D+45 D+34 -11 Bob Menendez D NJ D+22 D+11 -11 Jim Costa D CA-16 D+25 D+15 -10 Duncan Hunter R CA-50 R+14 R+3 -10 Steve King R IA-4 R+13 R+3 -10 Rob Woodall R GA-7 R+10 R+0 -10

*Excluding open-seat elections, elections that did not feature both a Republican and Democratic candidate, jungle primaries, elections with multiple incumbents and elections where the incumbent was an independent.

†Based on the state or district’s partisan lean, its elasticity and the national popular vote.

Source: ABC News

So I suppose you could argue that these recent comments could make him an even worse incumbent, and that would cause him to lose the next time out.

But again … you’d have to assume another D+9 (or similar) national environment in 2020.

And if that happens, Republicans are getting wiped out anyway; King’s seat won’t matter.

sarahf: But is what’s happening with King a blip, as he’s consistently been one of the party’s more controversial members? Or is this more of a watershed moment where the GOP says, “we’re not willing to tolerate views of white supremacism in the party”?

julia_azari: It could be an early watershed moment, Sarah.

perry: I don’t think this is a watershed moment. But Republicans have now created a baseline: We will purge you if you openly say that you support white nationalism and white supremacy.

But it’s unlikely that Trump would ever cross that exact line. He and ex-senior White House adviser Steve Bannon have always said they are for nationalism, not white nationalism. Arguably, actions that align with a white nationalist agenda aren’t as problematic, at least politically, as words in support of white nationalism.

Most people who are wary of America getting less white and less Christian can figure out how to not declare their intentions so openly. For example,saying Mexico is sending rapists to the U.S. is pretty racist, but it’s still different than saying, “I support white supremacy” or “I don’t see a problem with white supremacy.”

sarahf: But I do wonder if the litmus test for what is and isn’t an acceptable comment will change?

julia_azari: These things are very slow to change, and one of the things that I think is challenging for Republicans today vs. Democrats 60 years ago or whatever is that racism has taken on more subtle forms in the current era — predatory lending, problems with the criminal justice system — that are much less obviously egregious than lynching and de jure segregation. (Even though the contemporary issues are very serious, and I’d point out that Democrats also contributed to these problems in past decades; no one gets a pass on this stuff).

perry: So I don’t think the GOP’s litmus tests can change much right now because Trump has been racist in many ways. He hasn’t used the N-word or explicitly identified as a white supremacist, but any broader definition of racist behavior will include Trump.

To put this another way: The gap between Trump and King is fairly narrow.

julia_azari: I sort of disagree with Perry about the possibility for this being a moment, though, as I said, I think it will be slow. Here’s David Broder writing about Jesse Helms’s retirement in 2001.

He makes a point that Helms had every right as an elected senator to hold and fight for his views, before condemning those views and arguing against “sanitizing” Helms’ legacy. For elected Republicans to actually draw a boundary around a set of views is very unusual in the American context. Not only was racism the norm, but we have tended to see legitimacy in the process of being elected, not in the substance of the views.

nrakich: Yeah, I think it’s really splitting hairs to argue that there’s a meaningful difference between Trump’s (and other Republicans‘) thinly veiled racism and King’s more explicit racism. And King’s crossing of some invisible line is clearly not the real reason the GOP has condemned him. The real reason is that King is one of 435 and Trump is president.

If that rumored tape of Trump saying the N-word comes out, are Mitt Romney and Liz Cheney going to call on him to resign?

I doubt it.

perry: I think Romney would call for Trump to resign if he was on tape calling a black person the N-word.

Liz Cheney, no.

I think Nathaniel is basically right: Trump is being excused because he is president.

But my sense is that a lot of Americans think racist means only using the N-word or something very, very explicit, and Trump hasn’t crossed that line yet.

julia_azari: Which is sort of related to what I was saying before: We don’t really have a political tradition of holding people accountable for substance as long as they hold power through a legitimate procedure.

sarahf: What I find so interesting in the backlash against King is that he didn’t make a racially explicit comment that targeted one group of people. Instead, he signaled that he thought an inherent racist ideology was OK, and that was enough to spark outrage.

perry: So there is a new book coming out by Duke professor Ashley Jardina called “White Identity Politics.”

She argues that we tend to think of white identity politics as being largely prejudices against groups like blacks and Latinos. What Trump has tapped into, she argues, is not only that racial resentment but also a kind of pro-white-people politics.

So it’s not totally about being against minorities; it’s also a kind of white pride.

I think King hints at these ideas at times.

When he defends “Western civilization,” I think people are hearing that he might think ideas from Africa or Asia are bad. And, sure, a lot of what King has said seems to look down upon people who are not white. But part of what he is saying is that “white people are good and have great ideas.”

julia_azari: Combined with this idea is the belief among white people that they face racial discrimination (it has become a somewhat widespread view). This seems like a key element of the white identity appeal, that there’s an element of grievance, in addition to a pride in one’s identity or background or whatever.

perry: So I do wonder if people talking about racial issues are at times talking past one another. King is saying that he is pro-white, but that is interpreted as being 100 percent about being anti-black or anti-Latino.

So if conservatives aren’t allowed to say that “Western” or “white” culture is good and that Mexican immigrants and Muslims diminish that culture, that would affect more Republicans than just King. You can hear these kinds of views on Fox News, from Trump and from other influential conservatives. If Republicans start purging those views, the impact will go beyond King.

julia_azari: Making coded racial appeals has been a successful strategy for Republicans and, at times, some Democrats (Democrats have moved left on racial issues, even in the last decade). But maybe we’re getting to the point where it won’t be.

perry: I agree with what Julia said, but I also thought it was true in 2002. Trent Lott resigned under pressure from his Republican leadership post in the Senate over something way, way less controversial than many things Trump has said. (Lott praised Strom Thurmond’s 1948 presidential campaign, which was centered on pro-segregation views.)

julia_azari: Yeah, I think these things move really slow.

perry: We may not see a steady decline in the acceptance of racist behavior, but something more complicated, with racist comments being more tolerated at some times than others.

nrakich: I think about that Trent Lott controversy all the time!!

If anything, we’ve moved into a place where coded racial appeals are more socially acceptable, not less — at least in the medium term (i.e., since 2002), not the long term (since 1960) or short term (since 2016).

But I do think that openness is causing us to grapple with coded racism as a society. It’s the latest battle in the culture war.

And the liberal side may very well win in the end. But it took emboldened people on the far right to spark the fight in the first place.

julia_azari: If it is a politically costly move for Republicans to cut King loose, then maybe we are seeing actual change. If not, maybe we are seeing the Lott thing all over again. That was pretty cheap as far as political costs go.

perry: I assume this kind of question is always context-dependent. It is easier to replace a congressional leader or a rank-and-file member of Congress than the president. For instance, it’s easier for Democrats to say in 2018 that Bill Clinton should have resigned for inappropriate behavior with an intern than it would have been to say that in 1998, when Clinton was still in office.

sarahf: So maybe we don’t see pressure on Republicans to speak out against Trump until much later.

julia_azari: But maybe it opens space for a 2020 primary challenger?

nrakich: There are also confounding factors, like Trump’s problems in other areas — i.e., the Russia investigation. If special counsel Robert Mueller’s report implicates him in collusion or obstruction of justice and ends up destroying his legacy, it will be easier for future historians and laypeople alike to pile on him for the other stuff.

I would be curious to see how the legacy of a highly effective, scandal-free racist president would go.

Maybe something like Woodrow Wilson‘s, eh, Julia?

julia_azari: He remains a hero in some liberal circles.

I wrote a piece about a year ago about presidential legacy and one of the things I am most sure about is that the mainstream legacy writers — who historically have been mostly white — are very forgiving of racism.

The line most-often employed is something like, “That’s just what people thought at the time.”

Is it easy for me to imagine people saying that about Americans in 2016 or whatever? No. But that’s probably more about my limited imagination than anything else.

[austinpanda]

Dad Letter 091320

13 September, 2020

Dear Dad--

I saw an article in the Washington Post about how the football season kind of “snuck up on us,” that it’s arrived, but no one was spending every moment anticipating it, like normal, because we all have so much other shit to worry about right now. (Weird thing to write a whole article about, but I guess it’s more about seasonal milestones and how they’re importance lessens in times of crisis...I guess.) Anyway, I’ve found that whenever there’s a football game on, no matter college or professional, no matter what network is showing the game, if I look around long enough, I can find a live video stream of the game, and watch it. It’s tricky and a bit perilous, but it works. So I tuned into last night’s UT game briefly!

I thought the game started at 8:00 Texas time, which is 9:00 Bangor time, but it actually started an hour earlier, so by the time I tuned in, there were about 10 minutes left in the second quarter, and UT was up 35 to 0. I don’t remember who the other team was because I’d never heard of them. [I have consulted the internet, the opponents were the UTEP Miners, whoever the fuck that is, and the final score was 59 to 3, in favor of UT.] That was not exactly a nail-biter, was it?

We continue to experience a good deal of nothing much here in Old Town, Maine, and we love it! We arrived here on September 29 of last year, so we’re coming up on one year here in Maine. And fall is definitely setting in--more trees are turning, and more morning temps in the 30s. I believe the hummingbirds have stopped showing up, so I’ll clean the feeders and store them away soon for next spring. I love, love, love having actual seasons! It’s like living in a Charlie Brown cartoon. I’m still adjusting to living in a place where it’s not uncomfortable to just sit outside, even at the height of summer. It makes me feel more comfortable in my skin.

That gave me an idea a while back, something I’d like to try. We have something of a “yard” here at the trailer. Really it’s just the space next to our trailer that serves as our driveway, and the back third of it is grass. This is where we have our bird feeders, and birdbath. This is where we throw the raw peanuts for the squirrels and bluejays and chipmunks. It’s a pretty little rectangle of grass, even with the kerosene tank nearby. And there’s an electrical outlet on that side of the trailer. And the trailer is white, because everything in this damn state is white. What if I got one of those digital projectors, and we sat in camp chairs or patio chairs, or just a blanket on the grass, and I showed movies on the side of the trailer? There are no fire ants here. We could watch movies under the stars. I even have that popcorn machine that I got before the end times began; I can make movie theater popcorn. I could turn our yard into a mini drive-in theater.

Couple of things interfere with this plan in the short term. First, it won’t be long before it’s prohibitively cold outside, although folks here can be pretty hardy. (Or is it hearty? I looked it up; they both seem to work.) We can try to be hardy/hearty. I’d purchase or build a little fire pit, if we weren’t right next to the kerosene tank, and if it weren��t prohibited by our lease. We can work around that. Another problem is that digital projectors can be affordable and crappy, or they can be many hundreds of dollars, and maybe you’ll get something that will last, and produce a bright, crisp, image. So this part might have to wait until either I’m working again, or another federal stimulus occurs, or I get run over by a Lexus. But I like the idea. I love the idea of projecting Star Wars, or Apocalypse Now, or Close Encounters on the side of the trailer, and watching it with friends. Doesn’t that sound like a hoot?

Apropos of nothing, we have an ugly blue jay that shows up here every few days! (And he just showed up, which is why I’m thinking about it.) Normally, blue jays are beautiful, and this one has the typical blue and black & white body, but its head looks like it got stuck in the garbage disposal. All its head feathers are permanently fucked up, so instead of having a nice pointy majestic crest, like blue jays and cardinals always do, this one has a stubbly little bald head, like a furry black tootsie pop. He’s so distinctive, and coming by with such regularity that I’m going to have to get a picture of him, and we’re going to have to give him a name.

I’m watching Hamilton again, and I do hope you can get a chance to watch it some day. It’s the American Revolution set to really catchy music; I think you’d appreciate all the historical humor. One of my favorite things about it is King George III. He comes out a few times over the course of the story to provide comic relief. When the rebellion begins, he sings a song about the Americans called “You’ll Be Back,” and says:

And when push comes to shove

I will send a fully armed battalion to remind you of my love

Later, when George Washington steps down to relinquish power to John Adams, King George III comes back and sings a song called, “I Know Him,” where he says:

They say

George Washington’s yielding his power and stepping away

Is that true?

I wasn’t aware that was something a person could do

I’ve always found that last line hilarious, coming from King George III, who went crazy, but couldn’t just quit being king, because that’s not something a king could do.

I just realized the little church down the street has begun its online service! It seems to be a United Methodist Church (Do we like them…?) and the preacher is (gasp) a woman! I’m not listening right now because they’re singing a hymn, and even though the lyrics are being displayed on a TV behind her, I’d prefer to make up my own, and that would just be hilarious and disrespectful, so I’ve got the volume on low. I’ll tune back in when she starts talking again. Welcome to church in 2020, right?

I’ll have more fascinating news next week! We’re getting to the scene where Col. Laurens and Major General Charles Lee duel. All my love to you both!

[hirakdesherrani]

Double standards re: Annika and Gauri

Now this is not a bashing post, (or even if it is who cares, its my blog and I can write whatever I want) or yet another comparison post. I love both of these characters, despite the shitty and mostly inconsistent writing (especially in case of Gauri). Maybe I love Gauri a bit more, but that’s mainly ‘cos Shrenu is a superior performer. 

This is just to let out a year of frustration at the writers and the petty fandom BS when it comes to these two, so that I don’t carry this venom with me into the next year. 

My grudge is more againt the fandom than the writers because the writers did give a chance to Gauri to shine in some places, but again the petty fandom BS. At least the Shivika fandom is not divided into Shivaay v/s Annika; unfortunately for Gauri, its the Omkara fandom which bashes her the most because they just can’t accept that Om is not perfect, and undeserving of anyone, let alone Gauri. 

Anyways, so launching into it straightaway, lets start with the writers. The writers have in a major way been much more meherbaan on Annika than Gauri. Annika was explored for almost 140 episodes before Shivaay forcibly married her. What about Gauri? She was married off to Omkara in the 11th episode, and more or less her story starts from there. In fact, to be very honest the audience got to see only two episodes of Gauri’s life before Kali Thakur wreaks her life. The audience never got to see Gauri’s life at all. The only things audience got to know about Gauri is that she is adopted, she loves her mother and she is a devotee of Shankarji. And these three things Gauri shares with probably 80 million people in India. What makes up her character and who she is was not explored at all. Its like Gauri’s story started when she married Omkara. And she was immediately judged as a doormat and regressive and other assorted nonsense (which I will deal with later in the post). 

On the other hand, Annika’s independence was thrust in our faces for almost 150 episodes. The multitude of qualities which make Annika amazing were explored over a period of 5 months. Gauri was never afforded that opportunity in the first place. Annika is ‘khuddar’ and made her way in life without the advantage of naam, khoon and khaandaan. This was the main draw and USP of Annika’s character. Well, Gauri ne kaunsa naam, khoon, khaandaan ka advantage uthaaya hai?!? She is equally self-made and independent in life. But the writers did not spend more than two episodes exploring this. 

Another thing which writers highlighted over and over, was how Annika took care of Sahil and dueled with her nasty Buaaji on a daily basis. Episodes on episodes have been used on highlighting that how despite being an orphan, Annika took the responsibility of a young  Sahil. On the other hand, Gauri has been passed off as someone with a happy childhood. Yeah I imagine her childhood would have been very happy, with her chaacha and chaachi plotting on how much money they could earn when they sold her off. And if someone argues that Gauri had the presence of at least an adoptive mother, toh please, its more likely that Gauri brought her mother up than her mother raising her. Maaaa is probably the most annoying character in DBO’s universe, and let me just say that Sahil is probably one of the most sensible and perceptive character in IBverse, and Annika was lucky to have his support, unlike Gauri who was crippled by the existence of Maaaa and who filled Gauri’s head with nonsense about marriage and duties of wife. 

And now my greatest grudge against writers. Annika is the favorite of several people because she solves all her problems on her own. We have seen a gradual development of Annika’s character, where writers have spend time exploring why Annika is cynical about God, and why she always blames her ‘2Rs kismat’ for her troubles. Well, news flash, Gauri also defeats all evil on her own, and her life has been hella more scary than Annika’s. Gauri has been criticized strongly for her belief in god. Not just by IF/Twitter fandom (who are usually pathetic and crazy) but also by Tumblr fandom. Tumblr biggies initially dismissed Gauri for her ‘holier-than-though’ attitude, and parroting dialogues on faith and belief. 

But here I beg to differ. Gauri’s relationship with her Shankarji is perhaps the purest bond in the whole of IB/DBO universe. Gauri does not pray to Shakarji because its a social obligation or habit bred into her. Shankarji is like Gauri’s godfather. Since, Maaaa was mostly a useless creature, its to Shankarji that Gauri turns to in times of distress, and Shankarji looks after her. Shankarji has always protected her. If Gauri believes in Shankarji, then Shankarji has also responded in kind and looked after her. Yes, Shankarji messed up majorly when he chose Omkara for her, but khair, even God is not above making mistakes. Shankarji could have chosen someone wayyyy better for his chiraiyaa, but maybe Gauri made some Draupadi-esque blunder in her previous life (I hope you guys know the story, if not ask in comments, and I’ll reply), so she got stuck with Omkara. I’ll forever hate the writers for not exploring the Gauri’s dynamics and backstory with Shankarji. In my headcanon, some major incident must have happened when Gauri was young, and Gauri must have prayed to God and Shankarji must have got her out of trouble. Since then Gauri and Shankarji formed an unbreakable bond, which is why Gauri has this unshakeable faith in Shankarji. The writers never explored the reason behind Gauri’s faith and positivity and optimism, allowing the audience and fandoms to be hoodwinked into believing that Gauri was the typical Tulsi-Parvati type of character. I think I’ll be sour about this fact even after the show ends.

Coming to the next fact which annoys me. Now here I can’t blame the writers really. Its the fandom and their elitist notions that irk me. Annika is widely loved for her dictionary and mannerisms. In fact, to be honest michmichi has become part of my dictionary as well. But why is Gauri judged for the way she talks? Just because Annika is from Bombay/Mumbai so she is cool, whereas Gauri hailing from the North Indian belt (UP) is a victim of regionalist bias. Forget the trashy Twitter/IF fandom or the so-called ‘Om Deewaanis’ who suffer from a Pinky complex and believe that Gauri is not good enough for their trash son, but even sensible Tumblr blogs initially bashed Gauri for her linguistic traits. I mean, if you are a South Indian who does not understand half the words Gauri speaks, then is that the character’s fault or your own judgy ass for stereotyping her? (just an instance I came across). The funny thing is that now the same Tumblr blogs have come around to liking Gauri, and now blame others for being classist and elitist. The U-turns on opinions I’ve seen in this show, honestly.

Connecting to my old point about Gauri’s equation with Shankarji, is this other issue where both the writers and the fandom are at fault. The writers couldn’t spend more than two episodes on giving Gauri a proper backstory, but they spent over two months on her Pati parmeshvar nonsense. There were so many other facets to her character which could and should have been highlighted properly: her positivity, her optimism, humor, courage, quick wit, sharp brains. Yes, the writers did highlight those, but with a daily dose of PP jaap which ensured that audience would overlook her better qualities. And jo kasar writers ne chhod di thi, woh fandom ne puri kar di. It literally took an episode for the fandom to typecast her as a doormat. Gauri wan’t devoted to Omkara because he “married” her. Duh uh. Gauri saw Shankarji as her godfather, and in her mind Shankarji sent Omkara to save her. The fact that Omkara shares his name with Shankarji confirmed her belief further. In Gauri’s eyes, Omkara is her guardian angel. So, she easily put him on a pedestal. The fact is that Gauri is devoted to him not because he is her husband, she is devoted to him because she believes that it is her fate, if her God chose Omkara for her, then who is she to deny his choice, and the duties, the ‘patnidharm’ that comes along with it. I believe that if Gauri had married any other guy, under ordinary circumstances then the PP jaap would not be there because she would not have seen him as her savior. 

Another reason why the PP jaap was at its height during the Chulbul phase was because up until then Gauri just saw his good side. In her mind, Omkara was a good guy who valued his servants also, he was humble, down-to-earth, sorta socialist person, who loved his mother, but just suffered from some anger management issues. The fact that Omkara befriended a servant confirmed her belief that Omkara is some modern day socialist hero. But post-the Chulbul reveal in Bareilly where Om left Gauri to die, thats when she came to face the ugly truth of Omkara being a one-eyed, judgmental, hypocritical asshole. In my opinion, thats the reason why Gauri’s PP jaap toned down when she returned to Oberoi mansion. She still kept him on a pedestal but now it was more of an obligation than her own wish. Which is why she kept questioning his hypocrisy whenever given the chance, and pointing out his bullshit mental issues. This is also the reason why she did not waste a moment in leaving the mansion, once she guaranteed that Om is safe (in the DBO finale scene).

But did the fandom understand all this? Nope. For them Gauri was the regressive doormat, while Annika was the progressive modern bahu. Well, didn’t Annika stick to Shivaay after the forced marriage? Yes, she was emotionally abused into it by Dadi, but the fans were so willing to forgive Annika for staying with Shivaay, toh phir Gauri ne kya dosh kiya hai? Annika literally forgives Shivaay the next day for the Daksh misunderstanding where she could have almost died thanks to Shivaay’s judgmental ass. But Gauri is a greater villain for forgiving Omkara for leaving her to die in Bareilly track 2? Kyun bhai?? 

Also, lets not forget that Annika had made it a business to save Shivaay from Tia’s scam even before she got married to him. Like girl, do you go to the Oberoi mansion to do your job or spy on Tia? And for whom? The guy who called you road trash, threw you out of his house multiple times, put you in prison, and made abusive physical contact many times before? But the fandom forgets all this or calls it Annika’s generosity. But Gauri is bashed for her divinely ordained obsession with Omkara. 

If Gauri were really the doormat then she would have tried to impose herself on Omkara, but she never did. If Gauri were really the regressive doormat then she would not have confronted and questioned Omkara multiple times for asking what is her place in his life and what is her right to stay in the Oberoi house.  I won’t say that Annika didn’t question Shivaay, she did, but she never demanded answers. In fact, I was under the impression that Annika would leave after Tia exposure but she made no move to do that. Unlike Gauri who once the job was done, kept on questioning Omkara, until she gave up on him completely and just waited for Shivika to get married so that she could leave the house. How are the two characters so widely different that Annika is progressive while Gauri is regressive in the eyes of the fandom?

That the writers never gave the same opportunity to Gauri’s character to be explored is something I’ve already mentioned. But the writers didn’t stop at that. The multiple personality transplants they have given to Gauri and flipped her character on the tava for the plot’s convenience are a greater sin. The chief example of this is the bullshit English track which was just introduced for the sake of showing what an amazing brother Shivaay is and how amazing Annika is that she did not change herself for Shivaay. I mean Shivika are amazing, but is it necessary to butcher Gauri’s character for that? Gauri, who has been proudly proclaiming that she is paachvi paas, who almost picked up a fight with Omkara because she thought he was about to comment on her dressing style and ask her to change it, and who most importantly said that love is like Meera, where one should not impose oneself on another; would learn English all of a sudden because she wants to be ‘laayak’ for Om?? Like really?? This is such a major character blooper, only introduced to make Shivika look like the goals couple. Matlab what should I say about Shivika then, who need every other character in the IBverse to sing their praises to prove how ‘takkar’ ki their jodi is. LOL I’ll rather prefer Rikara over them then, at least they don’t need Dadi to remind the audience everyday that Shivika are true ishqbaaz. 

Of course, the petty fandom exploited this writing blooper to the fullest to say how Annika is self-confident while Gauri is an insecure mess. Well didn’t Annika lie and sacrifice her relationship with Shivaay because of Pinky’s dhamki? She didn’t have 1% confidence in their relationship to tell the truth of Pinky’ threats. Wasn’t Annika too defeated by her insecurity about naam, khoon, khaandaan that to protect Shivaay’s fake pride she sacrificed her love? Because she felt that Shivaay needs his naam,khoon, khaandaan more than her, despite the whole journey they had made as a couple over an year. Gauri, by those standards did not know Omkara that well, and neither were they in love at the point, for her to not be affected by her insecurities. But Gauri’s insecurities make her a doormat while Annika’s insecurities make her a self-sacrificing devi? Theek hai ji!

Several people get irritated that why is Rikara fandom so upset with Gauri shipping Shivika or playing matchmaker for them or part of the Obahus, etc. Well, they don’t get it. The DBO fandom has seen Gauri as the centre of everything, where she has ruled in her story. To see Gauri play second fiddle to Anika or Shivika is what irks us. We are not mad that Gauri is seen shipping Shivika; we are mad because thats all she’s been reduced to. When the Rikara fandom says that it wants badass Gauri, we don’t mean we want her to be stabbing villains or crushing cars. We want her to have her own story and be at the centre of her story. The break up scene is I think the most badass scene of Gauri, because she fully annihilates Omkara’s skewed perception of truth and walks out of their one-sided equation. 

Finally the only instance where writers have favored Gauri over Annika (till now). Unlike Annika, Gauri has always been able to keep the physical and romantic aspect of her relationship separate. The only consideration for Gauri in a physical equation is consent. Gauri never steps back from participating in consensual physical contact. Woh hamaari phooti kismat that Omkara is forever either drugged or faking it or the latent passive-aggressive nature of their relationship, which has effectively ensured that Rikara fandom never gets to enjoy a tharki scene. 

But what were the writers thinking when they showed a 27-year old, grownass woman, brought up in Mumbai, who btw watched B-grade movies with her brother, LITERALLY running away from the man she loves on the thought of consummation? Like what were they smoking? I get it that they want to show shyness on part of the heroine, but to actually make her run away like that? The whole scene where Annika wears the silly night dress on top of her kurta and escapes from the room is in the list of the top five cringey scenes I’ve seen on Ishqbaaz. What fandom thought as funny and comic and cute, I found that unbelievable and moreover, why do writers write such sequences which make their heroes looks like desperate horny men? 

Annika fleeing her room is funny, but Gauri being lost for a moment in that horrendous jal jal ke dhuyaan sequence makes her desperate? The kind of comments I read on IF that time were unbelievable. Since when did feeling desire make one a desperate, clingy woman? FYI Gauri did push Om away because he was not in his senses. The most ridiculous reaction has to be of certain ‘Om deewaanis’ (I’m sorry I just can’t stop myself from LOLing at this group), who wrote that Omkara is so attractive that Gauri just couldn’t resist him, like themselves. Somebody knock some sense into these teenage girls that Kunal and Omkara are two different creatures. The number of facepalm moments I had reading their comments that day! Thank God! the writers toned down that aspect of Annika, because “yeh aap kya kar rahe hai Shivaay” was getting on my nerves. 

While Annika got so much appreciation for finally being bold, let me just say that my girl Gauri already did it. I hated the inspiration scene, but I have to praise Gauri for unbelievable confidence she has in herself to follow Bade Bhaiyaa’s suggestion, and use her beauty as the one thing that can help remove Omkara’s artist block. Gauri is confidence goals. The fact that Gauri is in touch with her sensual side is perhaps the greatest reason why I prefer Gauri over Annika. 

To me, both my girls are amazing, and deserve much better the Obros. They also deserve much better than the writers shitty, inconsistent tracks and pathetic fandom bullshit. 

Honestly, for me the best possible conclusion of IB would be AniRiVya leaving the Oberois after giving them a piece of their mind about the maltreatment they suffered at their hands (Soumya, smart girl, pehli hi Australia chali gayi). Oh and Svetlana burning down the whole mansion with the Oberois in it. Maybe in distant future Svetty and Gauri can hook up, ‘cos honestly I’ve been on the SvetRi ship even before I thought of giving Rikara a chance (Om is just too stupid for Gauri). 

P.S. I mentioned above that Shrenu is a superior performer. I have two reasons for this. IB was my first Surbhi C. show while DBO was my first Shrenu show. Why I praise Shrenu more is because Gauri is a difficult character to play. While Surbhi has a lot in common with Annika’s bindaas attitude, Shrenu has nothing in common with Gauri. Gauri and Shrenu are too totally different personas, therefore, in my opinion Shrenu has to put in greater effort to play Gauri than Surbhi has to put in playing Annika. Secondly, Surbhi got a whole lot more material and 50 times greater screenspace to prove her mettle as compared to Shrenu, and yet Shrenu managed to impress me in the second episode itself while it took almost a month for me to warm up to Surbhi’s acting skills.