#unsympathetic janus…? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lio-the-chaotic-nonbeanie-weenie · 9 months ago

Text

Not Even Death Will Do Us Part

Summary: Thomas explores an old, abandoned house and finds that he isn't alone.

Pairings: BROTHERLY CREATIVITWINS

WARNINGS: IMPLIED DEATH, MENTIONS OF DEATH, FIRE, REMUS BEING REMUS, GHOSTS, UNSYMPATHETIC JANUS

(A/N: Found this buried in my ao3 and I've decided to post it here too since apparently, I never did. Also, fun fact: this fic was inspired by my obsession with Ghost Whisperer and ghost stories in general.)

Taglist: @enigmasalad @part-time-zombie @oatmeal-stans-the-trash-rat

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Why did I agree to this?”

Thomas sighs as he walks down the dark streets in the dead of the night. It’s cold and eerie and silent as he makes his way through an abandoned neighborhood. Rows and rows of old, dilapidated houses surround him. Dead trees dot their old, faded yards that are covered in dead leaves and junk. The wind whispers, making Thomas shiver and wrap his arms around himself. He didn’t plan to come here at first but his friend, Joan, told him that there was a haunted neighborhood that they had explored and wanted Thomas to see. Thomas, bored as hell and wanting to see something new, decided to go.

But now he’s starting to regret it a little. It’s cold and scary and he swears he thought he heard something from one of the houses. Yet, he walks on. He passes a house with boarded up windows and no door. Sooty footprints lead up the pathway and into the house. Yellow gloves dangle on a dead bush by the door along with a bowler hat and a black cape. Thomas shudders and walks on, swearing that he heard a soft hiss and faintly smelled some gasoline.

He passes the next house and spots a clothesline in the backyard. It has a navy polo and tie with red stains, a bright but dirty blue polo, a torn cat hoodie, and a purple and black patched hoodie with tears in it. Two pairs of shattered glasses sit on the doorstep. The house had shattered windows stained with...well, Thomas couldn’t tell if it was blood or dirt. It was just a dark smudge. He walks on and passes an open, tipped over garbage can. In it was a knife, an empty and shattered jam jar, and a shredded copy of a Sherlock Holmes story.

“This neighborhood is...something.” Thomas mutters, tearing his gaze away from the trash can.

He walks on and passes a few abandoned houses and stops again in front of another interesting house. Stuffed toys litter the front yard and none of them are intact. They’re all dirty, torn, with their stuffing ripped out and all over the place. Thomas gazes around and he sees another trash can tipped over. This one had many empty coffee cups, shattered sunglasses, a notepad with smudged notes, a broken pen, and many crumpled balls of paper. When he looks up, he notices a garden filled with dead flowers. A clothesline sits in the middle of it. The clothesline holds a faded and torn black leather jacket, a stained pink tie, and a beige cardigan with red stains. Thomas goes to walk on but pauses when he hears cartoony music softly playing from inside the house. Something about leaves and a vine. It sounded sad and mournful. Thomas listens for a moment before walking on, humming the song under his breath. He doesn’t know what a little soldier boy has to do with leaves and a vine but he still liked it.

Thomas continues to walk down the empty streets until he reaches the end of the neighborhood where a deserted cul de sac is. The houses here were much bigger and grander. Amongst the small group of houses is a grand, Victorian mansion that catches Thomas’ attention.

“What’s this doing in a cul de sac?” he mutters, looking up at the mansion.

The mansion is tall and it almost looks more like a castle with its two tower-like sections. Thomas walks up to it and there’s a faint scent of gasoline here too. He looks around and spots two empty jerry cans on the front lawn by some trash cans. They’ve rusted and are covered in soot. Thomas swallows nervously, walking even closer to the house that seems loom over the rest of the houses. The dead grass crunches under his shoes as he heads up the pathway. He then pauses when he steps on something hard. He looks down and finds a rusted golden locket, picking it up.

The locket is dirty and its clasp is gone. A green cursive ‘R’ is engraved on the front. When he opens it, Thomas finds a picture of a woman on one side and a boy on the other side. They were both smiling in the photo. Thomas assumes the people in the locket lived in this house. He pockets it and walks up to the door, looking up at the mansion once more. It was just so dark and eerie looking.

Joan had told him that it mysteriously caught fire years ago. They also said that there are rumors that the surrounding neighbors thought they saw someone leave on the night of the fire but it was too dark to tell. All they saw were a flash of yellow glows. Thomas wonders if those gloves were the same gloves that he saw earlier as he walks up the stairs to the front door. He swallows once more and pushes the door open, the sound of it creaking echoing inside the house.

“Creepy…” Thomas shudders.

He pulls out a flashlight and continues inside, finding himself walking through what used to be a foyer with rose-patterned wallpaper and a dusty wooden floor. A coat rack stands by the door and the clothes there were nearly burnt. Thomas could only make out a white coat with rusted gold buttons. Looking around, he then learns there used to be plants in here as he finds some empty plant pots with ash and soot in them. As he walks over to look at one of the pots-

SLAM!

The door that Thomas had come through had shut itself, startling him. Thomas’ heart pounds and he looks around for a moment. But there was no one else with him. He walks on, heading towards the living area ahead. As he walks under the threshold, he pauses again and looks down. There was a thick line of salt. Odd. Weren’t these only in tv shows with monster hunters and supernatural like?

Thomas feels anxious now as he walks into the living area. There’s a big white couch ruined from the fire and torn in place, its cushion springs poking out of the fabric. Wooden planks litter the place and a shattered glass chandelier sits amongst them on the floor, its fake little diamonds scattered everywhere. On the walls are pictures of the same woman and boy from the locket. Alongside those are more pictures of the boy, standing with another boy that is almost identical to him. There are other pictures but most of them were burnt to the point that most of the faces were unrecognizable.

Then, as Thomas turns away from the photos, he feels the air grow cold around him. He looks around nervously as the floorboards nearby creak and groan. His flashlight starts to flicker. The wind blows cool air once more and stirs some dust and ash around.

Then,

“A stranger...You’re a stranger...in our home…”

Thomas freezes, eyes darting around the room. There was no way he heard that voice just now...was there? Maybe he’s just hearing things?

“Not safe...not safe...Have to protect him…Get out!”

Thomas jumps at the sudden growl and the even colder burst of wind around him. The chandelier’s remaining diamonds tinkle with it and a nearby table slides towards Thomas, just barely missing him as it bumps into a wall.

“Please...don’t ruin our home…Please…”

“Why would I do that? Who am I even talking to?” Thomas calls out in reply.

The cool air came rushing by again and Thomas’ flashlight flickered once more. The flashlight flickered off for a few moments then on again. The table by the wall had moved back to where it was. A picture frame that had been on the wall was now at Thomas’ feet. Thomas picks it up and looks at it. It’s a picture of that boy again with his wide smile.

“So...you’re the boy in this picture?” Thomas replies, part of him now realizing that he might be talking to some dead kid.

“Yes...What about you, stranger? What are you doing here? Are you going to burn our house down too?”

Thomas shakes his head.

“No, I just came here to explore. A friend told me to check this place out. I can leave if I’m disturbing the place.” he answers.

“Oh...You can stay I guess...Just please promise you won’t destroy our house...It’s the last thing that’s keeping us safe.”

“Us? Is there someone else?”

“Yes!...Well...I don’t know...Maybe? I can’t tell...I hear him but I can’t find him or see him…”

“Him? Him, who?”

“My brother...I miss him...I want to find him but something is keeping me here in the living room...I can’t get upstairs and...I’d rather not...go into the basement...I never liked it there…”

“Oh, I see...well, since you’re here...wherever you are, do you want to tell me your name?”

It’s silent for a moment as Thomas returns the photo to the table.

“ ...My name is Remus…Princeton. ”

Thomas startles and turns around to see a boy that looked about 17 years old, standing in front of him. The boy, Remus, was wearing a black prince costume with a green sash. The costume was torn and bloodied and so was the sash. Cuts and bruises littered the boy’s pale skin. His hair was a mess and he had a few bruise marks on his face.

“You’re a…” Thomas breathes out.

“A ghost...I know...It’s a... long story...I’ll tell you later. What’s your name, stranger?” Remus replies.

“Thomas.”

“Thomas. Well...nice to meet you, Thomas.”

Thomas watches as the boy circles him for a moment, his red eyes looking back up at him. He looked so real and touchable that you couldn’t mistake him for a ghost. Thomas had thought that ghosts were transparent like the ones on tv.

“Likewise, I guess. Mind if I have a look around?” he asks. “I’ll try not to touch anything. Maybe I can help you find your brother?”

Remus lit up in surprise.

“Really?! You’d help me?!”

Thomas nods, feeling bad for the ghost. Something he never thought he’d be able to experience outside of the media he’s seen.

“Of course. It sucks that you’re all alone here.” he says honestly.

“How do I know you’re not trying to destroy it or keep me away from my brother?”

“I literally only have my phone, my wallet, and a flashlight. I don’t think I can destroy much with them. Plus, I’m pretty sure I’d need a whole contract to take this place down, even then I wouldn’t want to do that. I kinda like this house.”

“...Okay, I believe you...I’m sorry if I’m a bit...protective. Other people that have come by here have tried to destroy it. I had to get rid of them…”

Thomas raises an eyebrow and begins moving towards a door nearby.

“Get rid of them?” he says.

Remus nods, grinning almost too widely.

“Yep! They’re now fertilizer in Mama’s rose garden! Oh...they were so much fun to crush and cut into pieces...They were like fruit!” he giggles.

Thomas cringes and opens the door.

“I did not need to know that. Thanks.”

“You’re welcome!”

Thomas rolls his eyes with a small smile and walks in. Remus follows behind and he looks around. There’s a sad look in his eyes.

“The study...Roman and I had so much fun here… We’d be here for hours and hours even when it was already late at night. We’d share stories and we’d write plays. We’d make things for each other. I miss that so much…I miss him…”

“I’m guessing Roman is your brother?” Thomas says, looking through some books.

Most of the books were destroyed in the fire but some remained intact. Others were damaged here and there.

“Yeah. After...everything that happened...I woke up in the living room and I was alone. I couldn’t find him so I tried to look for him but I couldn’t get upstairs without getting this burning feeling inside. I tried the kitchen but I couldn’t get in there either. I could go in a few closets, the main bathroom, the laundry room, Mama’s garden, and the basement but I couldn’t go up. Roman had been with me when everything fell apart...He was the last thing I saw before everything went dark. ” Remus sighs.

“That’s horrible. But don’t worry, we’ll find him soon. I think I figured out what’s keeping you down here. There was a line of salt at the front door. Maybe there’s some by the kitchen and at the bottom of the stairs.” Thomas replies.

“Maybe...Can you get rid of it?”

“Yeah, if I can find a broom to sweep it away.”

Thomas then continues to look through the books, finding a few familiar titles. There were old mother goose tales and stories of dragons. There were Grimm Brothers’ fairy tale books and dark stories about witches. There were books of poetry and nursery rhymes. Thomas feels a little nostalgia when he sees the mother goose tales. Then his fingers found a leather bound book that seemed mostly intact. A layer of dust and ash covered the book and the corners were a little burnt but other than that, it was pretty much salvageable. Thomas looks at it curiously and pulls it out, sneezing softly as he brushes the dust away.

“Ooh! Roman and I loved this book! ‘The Story Of The King’ is our favorite. The king is this powerful ruler who had powerful magic that would let him create anything or do anything! So he used it to keep his people safe and to defend them from the dragon witch!” Remus says excitedly.

“Huh. Never heard of that story before but it sounds nice.” Thomas replies, opening the book.

The first page is the title in faded gold letters. At the bottom of the page are the names of the brothers written in messy writing. Thomas hums and flips through the book, admiring its pretty pictures. When he reaches the middle, he finds a few old polaroid photos. The first one was a picture of the twins on their 10th birthday. The next picture of the twins posing at the beach. Some of their friends were in the background.

Another photo shows the twins now standing outside of their house, wearing tuxedos and smiling for the camera. This photo was labeled ‘prom night’. Thomas also notices that another boy was standing with them. The boy’s face was scribbled out but he could see a familiar bowler hat and...yellow gloves.

Remus frowns at that photo and sighs, hugging himself. It’s been years since he’s seen...him. He doesn’t like thinking about him or even saying his name. There were too many bad memories.

“I never should have trusted him.” Remus murmurs quietly.

“Why? What happened?” Thomas asks, looking at the photo.

“He’s a snake. A lying, fucking snake.”

The air grows colder and Thomas shivers. He looks closer at the photo and notices that the twins were wearing matching lockets. He tilts his head and looks at it closer, taking out the locket that he found earlier. It was the locket that Remus was wearing in the photo.

“Hey, my locket! Roman and I made these for each other on our 15th birthday. Where did you find it?” Remus asks when he notices the locket, peering at it.

“I found it on the pathway to the front door. Do you want it back?” Thomas replies.

“Yeah! Mama made us graves in the local cemetery just outside of the neighborhood. You can leave it there later. If you find Roman’s, take it to the grave too.”

Thomas nods with a small smile, pocketing the locket again. He then puts the photos and the book away. He walks around the study some more before leaving the room, Remus following behind him. Looking around, Thomas notices an open door nearby. He opens it and finds that it’s some kind of a closet. He looks inside and finds the broom he needs. Closing the closet, he takes the broom with him.

“Where are we going with that?” Remus asks.

“You said you couldn’t get into the kitchen, right? Maybe if I get rid of the salt, you could go in there and see if Roman’s there.” Thomas answers.

“Oh, right! Maybe there’s a dead body in there!”

“I hope not…”

Remus only giggles as Thomas walks on to the kitchen. Thomas gets to work, sweeping the salt line away while Remus stands back and watches curiously. When that’s done, Thomas sets the broom aside and walks in. Remus cautiously steps forward, sighing in relief when he doesn’t feel the burning sensation anymore. With that, he follows Thomas into the kitchen.

When they walk into the kitchen, Remus isn’t surprised at the mess he sees. A vase of dead roses sit on them, some of them just wilted stems. Shattered plates litter the floor along with some knives. Torn curtains flutter in the window where the rays of the evening moon filter through onto dusty, cracked tiles.

“Oh.” Remus sighs, looking around. “I think it was better when I couldn’t go in here.”

“Did something happen to you here?” Thomas asks, looking at the plates.

“A lot of things did. A lot of things with that fucking snake.”

“Ah. Whoever this snake is, you must really hate him. Or he must really hate you.”

Remus huffs, kicking some plate shards aside.

“Of course, I fucking hate him. He ruined everything and hurt me and my brother.” he sighs.

“Ouch.”

“Yeah”

Thomas says nothing more and continues looking around the kitchen. There isn’t anything else more but rotten food, a planter with dead flowers in the windowsill that is now filled with ash, and overturned chairs around the table.

“So, do you think Roman’s here?” Thomas asks a moment later.

Remus shakes his head and sighs.

“No, I can’t feel anything here. He’d be here by now if he heard us.” he says and leaves the kitchen.

Thomas sighs and follows after Remus. He finds him by the stairs, trying to go up only to hiss in pain and back away. Frowning, Thomas goes over to him with the broom.

“Here.” he says and sweeps the salt away into a nearby trash can in the hall.

With the salt line gone, Remus dashes upstairs and Thomas follows with the broom. The upstairs mostly seemed intact and barely burnt. Pictures hang on the walls and some are of the twins and their woman. Some pictures show other faces and a few pictures have a certain face scratched out. Thomas doesn’t question it, already guessing who it is and why it’s scratched. Thomas continues to look at the photo when-

“Welcome to wonderland…we’ve got it all…”

“Remus? Was that you?” Thomas asks.

Remus shakes his head, listening as well.

“Potions and pastries that make you grow tall…”

Remus lights up when he realizes who the voice belongs to.

“Forests and cottages…castles and cards that can talk… ”

“Roman! I hear him! He’s much louder now! He’s in our bedroom!”

Remus runs over to the door and stops when he sees another line of salt with a footprint in it. It’s odd, he thinks, as every person who had visited the home before has never made it upstairs before Remus either scared them away or killed them. He decides not to question it and backs away. Thomas then comes over and sweeps the salt away, disposing it to the side. He then opens the door to the twins’ room. Remus rushes past him and Thomas shivers. It was much colder here.

The twins room had two beds, black and red and both messy. A shattered picture frame lays on the floor by the black bed. Across the room is a white vanity with a shattered mirror. The contents on the vanity seemed to have been violently shoved aside as they now laid on the floor. A locket sits amongst them and Thomas picks it up. It’s identical to the other one he had except for the ‘R’ on this one being red instead. He pockets it and looks around for any signs of Roman.

“RoRo? Are you there?” Remus calls, looking around.

A breeze blows by and the large windows by the vanity swing open.

“How do I know it’s you and not that awful snake?” comes a soft voice.

“What do you mean? Why would I be that snake?” Remus replies, stepping towards the doors.

“Because you’re here to trap me again. You want to keep me away from my brother…”

“But I am your brother. I’m right here.”

It’s silent for a moment then the window blows again and the curtains flutter. Thomas shivers as the cool breeze brushes by. He looked back to the window and there stood another boy.

“Roman! ”

Roman looked almost like Remus save for the red eyes. Remus had green eyes. Roman was also wearing a prince costume but it was white and red and covered in soot. His fists were burnt and bruised. His skin was tan and dirty. Then his eyes widened as he saw Remus.

The two run towards each other and soon fall into a hug on the floor, laughing as tears of joy roll down their cheeks. Thomas only watches fondly and suddenly this house wasn’t as scary as it used to be.

“I thought you left me, Remus.” Roman says after a moment of hugging.

Remus shakes his head.

“I would never leave you, Roro. You’re my big brother and I love you.” he says, smiling up at him.

“Gross, when did you get sappy?”

“Is it illegal to miss my dramatic, gay brother?”

“You’re gay too, dumbass.”

The two brothers share a soft chuckle then Remus sighs.

“Roman, you were right. About Janus. I never should have trusted him.” he says, looking at his hands. “We lost everything because of me.”

“Oh, Remus, no. You are not at fault. You were young and you didn’t. That snake tricked all of us, even when he held his right hand in truth. He was the one who lied to us. He was the one who set our home on fire. He was the one who separated us. He was the one who trapped us here.” Roman says, wiping some dirt away from Remus’ cheeks.

“But that fight we had that night…”

“Was entirely my fault, Re. I shouldn’t have said those things. I shouldn’t have believed Janus. You might be weird and messy but you’re still my baby brother. Nothing, not even death, can come between us.”

“Promise?”

“I promise.”

The two brothers share another hug before Roman notices Thomas standing there. He pulls back, looking over to him.

“So, I see you made a friend and didn’t murder him for once.” the older Princeton says, smiling.

Remus nods happily.

“This is Thomas! He helped me find you. He’ll take our lockets to our graves.” he explains.

“Uh...hi?” Thomas says with an awkward wave.

“Hello, I’m Roman. I guess Remus told you that already. Thank you for helping him find me. For helping us come back to each other. You’ve probably heard the story by now but our home caught on fire on the night before our 18th birthday. We had been arguing because I got angry about Remus inviting Janus. ” Roman explains.

Remus sighs.

“We were going to have a costume party the next day and were trying on our costumes before that happened. Then we fought and I watched Roman walk away to his room. I stayed in the living room and fell asleep there. Later that night, I woke up to the smell of smoke. I opened my eyes and there was smoke everywhere. I looked up and Roman was coming down the stairs and running to me. I heard a scream, and everything went black.” he continues.

“I saw my own brother die that night. The chandelier fell on him and before I could try and rescue him, he was dead. Then the smoke filled my lungs and things went black for me too. When I woke up, I found myself upstairs in the hallway. And I was all alone. I knew it was Janus. I saw his eyes through the smoke. Bright yellow and cold. I knew what had happened. Janus set our home on fire and watched us die.”

“He never liked Roman and no matter how hard I tried, he wouldn’t get along with him. I felt so conflicted. I used to love him then. But when I saw him that night and what he’d done to us, that love was gone.”

“And I thought I was never going to see my brother again. I thought I had heard his voice one day, but it was an illusion. A trick to trap me in my own room.”

“But you’re not trapped anymore, Roman. You’re free. We’re free. We’ll never see that snake again.”

Roman nods, holding his brother’s hand. He looks up to see a bright light filling the room and he smiles, feeling relief after all these years. Thomas, oddly enough, sees it too.

“I guess that means it’s time for you to go. I’m glad to help you get back together again. I hope you both rest peacefully now.” he replies, looking towards the light.

The twins nod, turning to the light.

“I guess it’s time. We can finally be with Mama.” Roman smiles.

“Mama…she died after us. I heard she couldn't take the heartbreak.” Remus breathes, chuckling softly. “She’s probably still pissed about the house.”

“True, but I’m sure she’ll be happy to see us anyways."

The two step towards the light but Roman pauses.

“Hey, Thomas. Can you do me a favor? Can you take care of this house? It’s all we have left, and I don’t want to lose it. You can stay here if you’d like, even redecorate it but please don’t let it be destroyed.” he pleads.

Well, that was new. Thomas hadn’t planned to own a house that someone died in or once used to be haunted. Then again, he couldn’t say no after hearing the story of the twins. They really did love this home and it was beautiful. So, Thomas smiles and nods.

“I’ll keep the house safe. I promise.”

Roman smiles at that.

“Thank you. Come on, Remus. Let’s go see Mama.”

“Goodbye, Thomas. Thanks for everything.”

Thomas smiles and watches as the twins walk into the light, vanishing away. The light then follows and it’s dark in the room again. But now, it wasn’t as cold as it used to be. With a small smile and a warm feeling in his chest, Thomas leaves the bedroom and heads downstairs. It’s late and he’s feeling exhausted. He goes home and dreams of two princes, ruling a beautiful kingdom and keeping their people safe.

Then...the next morning…

Thomas visits the neighborhood’s cemetery, leaving two lockets behind on a pair of tombstones.

In Loving Memory of The Princeton Twins

#sanders sides #sanders sides fic #ts fanfiction #roman sanders #roman sanders angst #remus sanders #remus sanders angst #c!thomas sanders #tw death #tw mentions of death #janus sanders #u!janus #tw unsympathetic janus #tw ghosts #tw fire #sanders sides ghost au #creativitwins #BROTHERLY CREATIVITWINS

20 notes · View notes

yourchemicallyimbalancedromance · 1 year ago

Text

Comfort At It’s Finest

Prompt: Virgil has a special blanket that sits carefully folded in the closet and only comes out after really bad days, when he needs it the most. It’s the blanket for huddling up and hiding under the bed, it’s the blanket for taking an almost-involuntary nap after the third panic attack of the day, it’s the blanket for pretending the world is less than sixty-four cubic feet in its entirety and has borders of fabric. It’s the blanket for retreating from a dumpster fire to cry himself to sleep.

It’s a blanket he got from Thomas, before he was accepted.

(Credit to @sleepyvirgilprompts for this idea which you can find here<3)

Ship: none? Unless you count this as platonic Thomxiety but I’m not sure, I don’t really see it that way.

CW/TW: panic attacks, swearing, unsympathetic Roman, unsympathetic Janus, sympathetic Logan.

Summary: Virgil locks himself in his room after the sides start fighting again, something about how almost all of them were holding Thomas back? He didn’t know, he didn’t care, he just wanted to feel okay again.

(Halloween has brought up some…odd and negative feelings, to put it lightly, so this is my way of dealing with that<3)

———————————————————————

Virgil couldn’t take it anymore; The shouting, the insults. He slumped against his door and covered his ears, breathing as if he had just run a marathon, trying desperately to remember the breathing techniques Logan had taught him. What was it? In for four out for…five? Fuck. He couldn’t remember, nothing he was thinking made sense, nothing in general, made sense. Everything was so loud and he couldn’t stop trembling no matter how hard he tried. He held his legs down with his palms and they seemed to stop shaking until he let go, all the built up energy making his attack worse than before. It was no use.

This was the third time they’d fought this week.

It was Thursday.

His hands didn’t muffle all the sound, however; he heard every single thing the others were saying in the commons; it was as if a megaphone had been held up to his door.

“well maybe if you weren’t such an asshole I would have t-“ Roman was cut off by..Janus?

“I’m the asshole?! I’m not the one who’s so deeply insecure that they have to project their shit onto others” he screamed.

The house fell deadly silent apart from Virgil’s heavy breathing. He could hear his heart in his ears. He wanted to go home, he was home, but this didn’t feel like what you would call a home.

“Fuck you, Janus. There’s a reason Thomas didn’t accept you for years.” Roman finally said, from the sound of it, through gritted teeth.

He heard someone stomp a few feet near his room, open a door, and slam it. Virgil froze, the sudden noise sending shock waves through his body.

he wanted everything to stop; the loudness, the insults, the fights, the slamming of doors, the stomping, the yelling, the anxiety, he wanted to be held and told he was safe, he wanted to go home, he wanted-

His tearful eyes drifted over to his closet to see a weighted blanket neatly folded and shoved into the back where no one but him could find it.

His blanket.

He pushed himself up off of the ground, a hand against the wall so he wouldn’t fall due to tremors in his legs. He reached up and grabbed it, letting it fall onto him, nearly causing him to fall to the floor.

The blanket was soft; light, but heavy enough to weigh on you a little. It was checkered black and white with little ghosts on every other patch. He eased up just the smallest bit at the sight of it. Thomas had given him this after the ‘My NEGATIVE Thinking’ video.

He quickly fell on to his bed, holding the blanket to his chest. it smelled of cinnamon and honey. Virgil had forgotten how in the worst of moments, if he pulled out his blanket, it would immediately default to any scent of his choice; subconsciously, he had chosen cinnamon. It reminded him of better times, happier times. How he and Patton had baked cinnamon rolls a few months after he was accepted, the smell of sugary sweetness wafting through the air.

The slight hint of honey reminded him of his first panic attack in front of the light sides, how he had curled into himself on the couch, silent tears escaping his eyes, face hot and red, unable to breathe, to speak, to move. Logan had helped him through it.

“Breathe in for four seconds,” he had said, inhaling, crouched down in front of him. “Hold it for seven seconds” he paused and waited for Virgil to follow his lead, and once he did he continued, “out for eight seconds.” He exhaled.

Virgil was so embarrassed that Logan had seen him like that that he proceeded to apologize profusely. “God, that was— I’m so, so sorry, I don’t know what that was, well I do, I think? It’s never been that bad I just—“

“That was what is known as a severe panic attack, Virgil. I take it you’ve never had one to that extent before?” His eyes were kind, caring, behind his glasses.

Virgil just shook his head, he didn’t know what to say, he felt that if he tried to talk the only words he would be able to say would be “I’m sorry” over and over again.

“I see. Say, do you like honey? Maybe lemon?” He had asked

Virgil nodded, and before he could stop him, Logan had begun making Honey and Lemon tea. Something about how “it’s very calming and quite good as well” he had said.

Virgil hadn’t noticed his eyes drift closed but he didn’t feel the need to force them back open. The sharpness of the house felt dimmer, quieter; as if they were sizzling into a low hum, something waiting to pounce again. He was too fatigued to worry about it, even though something in his gut told him to stay alert, something was bound to happen again, he didn’t listen, just readjusted positions under the warmth of the blanket.

He needed to say thank you to Thomas later.

#sanders sides #thomas sanders #ts virgil #virgil sanders #logan sanders #ts logan #roman sanders #ts roman #ts janus #janus sanders #unsympathetic Janus #unsympathetic Roman #slight thomxiety?#idk lol I don’t really consider it that but eh #slight angst #slight fluff as well?#not extremely proud of this one but proud nonetheless #I totally didn’t write this while laying under my weighted blanket /sarc /j

51 notes · View notes