#unpunched

[poetry-protest-pornography]

Looks like it's time for a meeting of the Evil Bastards Club.

I can't wait for Nail to punch them.

[louisironson]

absolutely beautiful song that i love but the thing is i did learn it from travis mcelroy

[welcomehomeincorrectquotes]

During a DND session:

DM!Sally: *narrating* You find an unpunched ticket from the Witchlight Carnival"...

Barnaby: *excited gasp*

DM!Sally: You see the signature of a woman named "Isolde"...

Barnaby: Let me see that ticket! Oh, and rather than being signed by Mr Witch or Mr Light is just tells us that this is an OLD TICKET.

Howdy: What? Gimme that!

Barnaby: Well, it's an OLD ticket. It's expired.

Howdy: Where are you seeing that it's old?

Barnaby: Right there! Where the signature is!

Frank: I think what he's saying is that he can deduce that it's old because of the signature that is on it.

Barnaby: Yeah, see? It says IS OLD.

*beat*

Howdy: *wheezes before collapsing from laughter*

Frank: There it is. Took him a moment, but he got it.

Wally: I don't get it.

[imagionationstation]

OKAY— so like, we had scenarios of which the B-Team were raised by the Shredder, but what if it was the A-Team??

Shredder telling both Leonardo and Raphael (who now goes by Takeō and Akihitō respectively) lies about their younger littermates (Donatello and Michelangelo, whom he named as Junkō and Kōta)— telling them that their younger siblings have been ruthlessly killed by Hamato Yoshi, who had deemed them as an abomination.

In fact, Shredder wasn't even aware of the existence of the younger two; at least, not until both Takeō and Akihitō brought it up a few months after they were officially able to carry out missions and daily patrol. However, he couldn't deny that it's truly a blessing— there's a chance that they might know of Hamato Yoshi's location, and even then, Shredder can expand his army of powerful mutants.

Donatello and Michelangelo, on the other hand, aren't so thrilled about having to 2v2 their older brothers at just about everytime. There's also that the two have the tendency to play dirty. Stalking their friends and whatnot, it's driving them up the wall.

I don't know if Karai should be with the Shredder, because her rivalry with the A-Team over the younger onces is delicious.

What do you think?

I love this. No, no, wait, see my vision, look-

Takeō and Akihitō are everything that Shredder needs them to be. They took up training from the moment that their little legs could walk and they excelled past anything that he’d ever seen before, and one of Shredder’s greatest fighters happens to be blind, mind you, so he knows what greatness looks like.

He knows it has to relate to the fact that they’re mutants, but he couldn’t care less. With one student who bears a determination to please and the other with the violent fury to be molded like his own, they’re better than an entire legion of Foot soldiers. Takeō makes sure every command is followed and Akihitō leaves no enemy unpunched- what could be better?

They’re perfect. No, they’re better than perfect. They’re a miracle.

One that he never hesitates to take advantage of. If Yoshi had done one thing right in his lifetime, it was leading him to them.

And then- AND THEN-

Enter Mikey and Donnie.

The universe throws out two turtles with on obvious ignorance of surface life and an instinct to defend those that dwell on it. Leo and Raph’s world is thrown out of whack the first time that they spot them- considering Mikey is a younger-shaped replica of them with freckles. They keep an curious eye on them from a distance, but uncertain what to make of them, don’t interact.

They inquire about it to their father and (considering Saki likely stole them from Yoshi) he fabricates a story that horrifies them. They already know about Yoshi and how he killed Karai’s mother- but he tore apart their family too?

Afterward, it takes about five seconds to connect the dots on who these mutant turtles are. They go out to track down and reconnect with their brothers. *insert canon plot stuff*

When Donnie and Mikey try to save a kidnapped April, they fail pretty badly. The Saki brothers step in, stop the Kraang from taking the girl before Donnie and Mikey’s brains get blown out, but don’t really do much about them taking the dad. They don’t really care about the humans. They’re far more interested in prodding the turtles.

And, after taking April to her aunt’s, prodding absolutely happens from both sides.

The childish giddy air of the Junkō and Kōta upon finding their siblings obviously cements them as the younger siblings in the Saki brother’s minds. They don’t doubt for a moment that they are who they say they are because Splinter told them that they had two missing brothers as little kids.

Mind made up, Leo insists that they come home. Mikey insists that they have a home and Donnie admits they shouldn’t really wander off with strangers. They both vocalize that their rat dad needs to meet them first since he’s the one who lost them and he’s misses them and they don’t have to abandon their dad or anything, they just really want them to meet Splinter! (The Foot symbols on their gear mean nothing to the Hamatos and the name Splinter means nothing to the Sakis. Oopsy.)

And so they wait around for Mikey and Donnie to collect Splinter and then Splinter comes across his sons and Leo and Raph are tolerant until he introduces himself as Hamato Yoshi and then it all clicks that the man who Shredder thought killed their brothers and he had stolen them away instead and he’s the reason that they haven’t see them for fifteen years-

They don’t even give Yoshi time to explain before they’re attempting to eliminate the threat. Donnie and Mikey are insanely confused until one of the brothers lets it slip that their dad is Saki and- oh wait are they evil?!- so now there’s fighting, attempted forced reasoning and kidnapping of little brothers, but the Hamatos manage to get away.

So now Leo and Raph’s are simply DISTRAUGHT because the madman had stolen and brainwashed their little brothers so how were supposed to focus on anything else when they’re out there but actively on the wrong side of this war??

It trashes their game and suddenly his miracle team is no longer a shinning example of perfection. Once again, Yoshi has ruined something great and, instead of seething, Saki gets creative.

He fakes an understanding with what his sons are going through and expresses a wish that he knew where Yoshi was so that he could put an end to the threat. If only, they could find the lair where he was keeping their brothers prisoner, maybe then they rid the world of the rat and bring them home. Once they’re free from Yoshi’s dark influence, they could all be one happy family.

And Leo, like the helpful little leader he is, realizes that they could find the lair. Him and Raph could totally find a way to convince the brothers to take them home, or even find a way to get in without their knowledge. They were ninjas, masters of deception and lies. They could do it, Master, if only he would give them a chance?

So he does because an end to Yoshi and two new powerful warriors is more than he could hope for. Exactly what he deserves.

And the rest of the series is just Raph and Leo doing everything in their power to inch their way into their brother’s trust. They stalk them in a desperate itch to make sure they’re okay, which leads to them intercepting and assisting on a bunch of Kraang mission.

They run into each other when Donnie and Mikey try to stop the Foot from being evil, and Leo and Raph are more concerned with making sure nothing happens to their brothers that the Hamato brothers end up completing their mission more often than not.

Leo and Raph are still dedicated to the Foot but their priorities are skewed every time their brother come into play. Nine times out of ten, baby brothers take first priority. And Saki lets these mishaps happen because his sons are insistent upon gaining the Hamatos trust.

It doesn’t take Donnie and Mikey long to realize what Leo and Raph are doing, protecting-them wise. They don’t quite understand it, but they assume that even though they have been misguided and brainwashed by Shredder, they still are good people deep down. It’s incredibly annoying that they are always in the way and can’t seem to realize how what they’re doing is obviously evil, though.

Like plotting younger siblings do, they adapt to use the brother’s new apparent weakness against them, putting themselves in situations where the Saki brothers have no choice but to interviene- even if that means slicing their own bots or preventing their own missions from succeeding. And the best part is that the Saki brothers have no idea that they’re being played- they really just believe that their baby brothers are kinda bad at their jobs.

Which really doesn’t help with the whole PROTECT alarms constantly ringing in their brains.

As for Karai, I think she would still be with the Foot, but instead of a doting older sister, there would be jealousy vibes. She’d been overshadowed her entire life by these ‘perfect’ brothers and she jumps at the opportunity to impress her father when they start slipping. She could even play an antagonist role- actively trying to dissuade her father’s approval of Leo&Raph’s activities in order to get a better standing. She doesn’t want them murdered at the stake or anything, simply taken out of the favoritism role so that his actual human daughter (or so she thinks) can have a scrap of his attention.

I WAS GOING TO STOP HERE BUT YOU HAVE ME THINKING ABOUT PLOT AND SUCH NOW-

Like, Donnie would now be the eldest with the responsibilities of genius and leader, which means that he probably feels like his baby brother’s one line of defense against an entire universe. Splinter didn’t train his boys for war- but Saki did. Imagine the pressure on his shoulders to keep his family safe while actively on deadly missions with brothers who could turn on them at any second, stuck under the weight of wanting to get April reunited with her missing family.

Leo’s side of the spectrum is spent worrying that two of his brothers are under the abusive care of their kidnapper. He desperately hones the “but I can totally bring them to our side and make them see things our way!” attitude that he has for Karai during the canon series. He does everything in his power to keep the blame from falling on them when missions go wrong, fabricating stories for their father, like he’s always done to keep Raph out of trouble. He doesn’t care for the Hamato’s missions, but he cares greatly for their safety, so he makes sure they tag along at every opportunity, whether they are wanted or not. Stalking is never out of the question, even if it doesn’t take long for the Hamatos to adapt to their presence.

I CAN’T SHUT UP ABOUT THIS SUDDENLY:

So there’s this song “Our Word” from 36 questions that absolutely has the vibes from this au that has taken root in my brain and when I think of Leo being a sneaky little guy and keeping Raph out of trouble- IT FITS. Well, these specific verses anyway:

When I was a little [boy] Like really little, like eight or so I was playing in my father's study A place in the house I wasn't supposed to go

My father fancied himself a sailor His study was filled with nautical decor He kept a boat in a bottle on the top of a shelf And it shattered on the ground when I slammed the door

I told my [brother] everything I told [him] I was so, so sorry [He] told me, "Don't cry, When he comes home tonight We can make everything okay This is all we have to say"

"We don't remember a boat in a bottle It must've fallen off its shelf alone We know you loved it, we're so sad it's broken But neither one of us was even home"

And it's our word Yes, our word Against his

HOLY MOTHER OF MUTATIONS I AM DEVOURING THIS AU AND NOW I HAVE RETURNED WITH CONCEPT:

“You shouldn’t be out alone.”

Donnie lands as irritation crawls up his spine and becomes fuzzy little ambers in his brain. He has a few irrational thoughts, such as giving the nuisance a taste of throwing stars, but they’re dismissed as he pretends to check his t-phone. He can sense one entity behind him, but his partner doesn’t seem to be hovering nearby.

He turns, t-phone at his side, the cheese phone on speed-dial. He doubts the Foot ninja wants to kill him, but if this is another kidnapping attempt…

Well. Better safe than sorry.

“Apperently, I’m not. Need something?”

“You almost got caught tonight.” Takeō cocks his head, face passive. “You shouldn’t be breaking into military junkyards. There have to be safer options. There’s a place in Chinatown. Less guns.”

“Well, as soon as civilians throw out this kind of equipment,” Donnie pats the bag on his hip. “I’ll consider it.”

He frowns. “You’re taking risks.”

“Weren’t your men trying to slit my throat last week?”

“That was not my doing.”

“Oh, sure, Shredder doesn’t want to lure Splinter out of hiding and you would never kidnap me or Mikey, right?”

“I didn’t know about Bradford’s scheme until it was to late.” Takeō scans his face and Donnie denies the sincerity any thought. “You have to believe us- why else would we help you escape?”

“To earn our trust? For future blackmail? As some part of some evil Foot plot to hurt Sensei?” Donnie sneers. “I don’t care what your excuse is when you made my brother bleed.”

“I told Bradford to back off, but I can only do so much.” The tone is defensive, but his frown softens guiltily. “I can’t stop the bots from doing their programing. Maybe if my clan did not see you as a threat- if you would rethink your position-”

His grip tightens over the t-phone. “This is not a conversation that I am entertaining. Goodbye, Takeō.”

“Wait-”

He does not.

And then Takeō is across the rooftop and roughly taking hold of his arm before he can take more than two steps. The t-phone clatters, adrenaline surging as he stops dead in his tracks. His attention shoots from the weapon on the warrior’s hip and then to the blue gaze that is drilling holes into his skull.

He swallows, proud that his voice doesn’t shake. “Let go.”

Takeō tightens his hold. He steps forward, their gazes locked, face unreadable. Donnie thinks it might be an intimation tactic, but he’s not scared, per say. His gut squirms in discomfort and he feels weirdly small despite being inches taller. He expects a low warning, or some kind of dark threat to cut the air between them.

Instead, he gets a soft promise laced so heavily in passion that it might as well have been shouted across the rooftops.

“I would never hurt my brothers.”

Donnie is silent for several seconds.

“You’re hurting me right now.”

Takeō tears his hand away as though he just found out that Donnie was radioactive. Donnie rubs the area, mostly for show, in the hopes of dissuading him from trying that again.

“…I-I meant…” Donnie looks up. No hesitation crosses his face, but his words come with uncertainty. “Not like that. Never like that.”

Donnie humphs.

“Is- Is Kōta-”

“Mikey.”

Takeō stares and Donnie glares back.

The warrior relents. “How is he?”

“It was a flesh wound.” Donnie picks up the t-phone, unsure why he’s telling him anything. “He’s already back to being a hassle.”

A beat of quiet. “I suppose that means we’ll be reunited soon.”

“To kick your shells in? Yeah. Probably.” Donnie puts away his device, looking somewhere over Takeō’s shoulder to the bulky shadow who has been inching closer through the extent of their conversation.

“You know, family means more to me than biology. Shocking to hear from a scientist, I know.” He pauses for effect, considering. “A family with differences is still a family. You might be serious about this whole hurting thing when it comes to Mikey and me…” He narrows his eyes and trains the hostility on the piercing gaze. “But if I find out that you even thought about touching my father again, you can forget any chance of brotherhood. I might seem like a weak joke to you, but I promise that I can make your life a living hell.”

Donnie stares him down, grip tight over the strap of the bag filled with weaponry that he’ll use to make Metalhead truly surface worthy so nothing can harm Mikey again, and dares Takeō to challenge him.

“There’s no stronger warrior than one whose greatest virtue is their loyalty.” Takeō decides simply. “And there is nothing more that I’d expect from a brother.”

Donnie is pretty sure that’s a compliment. He’s not sure what that he to do with backing off his father, but he accepts it.

He releases the bag. “Glad we understand each other.”

He turns his back to the ninja, looking over his shoulder. “And don’t have Akihitō follow me home.”

Takeō stiffens, eyes widening. He smirks. “See you later, bro.”

With a burst of speed, he takes off.

To their credit, they don’t follow.

Donnie knows better to assume that this’ll be the last time he has eyes on his shell. But, for the first time, he thinks he won’t mind.

[captainuranium543]

sorry i've reblogged a ton of your stuff it's just too goddamn funny not to

what's one thing you think should happen before FT HYQ ends? (don't say Nalu becoming canon)

I do not mind reblog away I like it when people like what I say and say something in return it's like "omg we are sooo correct"

Also I firmly believe erza is dying HEAR ME OUT. They all get one wish right? If someone dies they can come back via wish. Red flag 1.

Erza hasn't had a lot of development throughout the manga mostly she's just been there to punch people and be really fucking funny, however she has had one moment in particular where jellal made her promise to come back safe. Red flag 2.

Erza is the only character who didn't say what she would have wished for besides natsu in the beginning and tbh the only thing I can see her wishing for is for simon to be alive again which can't happen because mashima already said he wasnt coming back. Red flag 3.

Finally erza's whole relationship with death is very strongly tied to jellal and natsu, natsu was the one to teach her to live for your friends instead of dying for them and she in turn convinced jellal to live and redeem his guilt rather than dying for nothing. Natsu is another character who hasn't gotten a lot of development so having erza die AFTER SHE EXPLICITLY PROMISED HIM SHE WOULDENT DO THIS AGAIN. would be gutwrenching. Jellal on the other hand has gotten much more development in 100 year then ever before and erza dying would be the gutpunch and gut unpunch(when she comes back cuz she's def not dead forever) that he needs to finally A) join fairy tail and B) make jerza cannon if you wanna be optimistic.

Oh and obviously aquarius is coming back I don't think mashima is ending 100yr without Lucy getting her key fixed

Sorry for eranting but I think about it a lot

[notapervertjustabugbear]

Hi Torbek buddy!!! What prize were you hoping to get from the witchlight carnival? I got some unpunched slots on my ticket left!!

... Torbek wants the toy spider...

[thewanderinginn]

Goblin Days (Pt.1) — The Wedding

One of the benefits of being short was the Unpunchability Principle. It was one of Rags’ theories on the world: tall people felt a bit bad about hitting you. This applied even if you were at war; enemies tended to seek out the big and imposing types first. If they did go for you, it was because they thought you were small and, therefore, weak.

The entire world was heightist. Just like it was also rightist and, possibly, racist. People tended to favor right-handed things and liked tall and attractive people. This generally worked as a rule of thumb across species, though Rags would own that she had no insight into Selphids and a few other races.

All this to say that the Unpunchability Principle had worked well in Rags’ relatively short life. Until it didn’t. Read More...

[raineandsky]

#18

Considering the agency sold the heroes to the public as the protectors of the people, they sure are violent.

Most of the run ins the villain has had with heroes recently have all ended with him having to escape the moment he gets opportunity. He’s had to nurse bruises and scrapes and cuts and deep wounds and near broken bones on multiple occasions by now. They never used to be this bad – they’d just incapacitate their opponents enough to arrest them, but a policy must have changed somewhere. Now they beat villains into the ground as hard as they can and they don’t even stop there.

He’s the definition of can run can’t hide – he narrowly evades death time and time again, and yet his reputation has made him a person of interest. He’s long since left the business of villainy, simply minding his business and going about his day when heroes try to start fights with him. He’s basically gone into hiding because of it, and on the days he’s forced outside he tries to keep his wits about him for any lurking do-gooders. He’s well out of touch with his pride and competence that came with being a criminal – and being good at it.

Instead of the smug expectancy that used to come with happening across a hero in the streets, all he feels is dread as the hero stalks down the road towards him. “Out a little late, [Villain]?” she greets coolly. The villain backs away slightly, and she grins at his response. “Oh, we’re not scared already, are we? I haven’t even done anything yet.”

“I– I’m not scared,” he defends, and he cringes at the obvious stutter in his voice. “I’m trying to eat my dinner tonight without my jaw hurting, is all.”

His attempt at a show of confidence is falling flatter by the second, and the hero is clearly revelling in his fear. “Oh, don’t worry.” She leers dangerously closer, and the villain takes another subconscious step away from her. “The food in jail is just slop. No need to chew anything that could hurt your precious jaw.”

“I’m not going to jail. I’ll be eating solid food at home with my unpunched jaw that doesn’t hurt.”

“This is a lot of warming up, isn’t it? Why don’t we skip the small talk and get to the dancing, hm?” The hero asks, her fist already balling as she continues approaching. He’s trying to think of a way out, but the best way out is past her, down the narrow alleyway. Maybe he could turn down this street, but it’s a deadend. It just delays the inevitable.

The hero takes a shorter step forward to lean into her swing. The villain barely manages to duck out of the way, feeling the air whizz by him as her fist passes by a hair's breadth. He goes to return the gesture but he doesn’t get the chance. The hero’s other fist punches into his gut, and he doubles over with the explosion of pain the contact brings. Here it is, he thinks distantly. The beginnings of another narrow escape and another agonising evening recovering.

The villain only gets to get back upright when her fist returns to connect with his face, sending him tumbling to the side and onto the floor. The world is spinning, his daze fixed blurrily onto the red splatters on the pavement in front of him. Is that his?

There’s a hand on his shoulder. He turns to throw it off but the hero is already on him, shoving him onto his back and pinning him to the ground below. The gravel is digging into his back, the stickiness of his own blood on his face making his head swim. It takes a moment to realise the warm feeling on his neck are her hands.

Fuck, she’s faster than the other heroes. It’s been less than a minute and he’s already at this point. He always found in the past that there wasn’t much escaping once it got here, and with the ferocity of the heroes recently he doesn’t stand a chance–

“Please…” The word tumbles out of his mouth before he can stop it, no more than a hoarse whisper. He makes a vain attempt to push her off of him. “Please, I don’t want to die.”

The hero snorts, the sound grating in the haze of his own pain. “You wish I’d kill you. There’s no getting away from me tonight.”

His struggling only gets more frantic at the nonchalance of her voice. She hasn’t struck yet; why not? What is she gearing up to do? She says something smoothly but he doesn’t hear her – can’t hear her – over his own shallow breathing and the scraping of his boots against the pavement. He has to get out, right now. She’s going to kill him. He can’t die. Not yet.

“Easy, cowboy.” The hero’s voice finally breaks through the distressed fog of his mind. His neck is cold where her hands have released him, and she’s kneeling next to him instead of over him, her hands gripping his shoulders worriedly. He wastes no time scrambling away from her as soon as he gets his wits about him.

“I’m– I’m not like that anymore,” the villain blurts. “Please, please, please, don’t kill me.”

She gets to her feet, a frown creasing the features of her face, and she closes the space he just opened between them without a thought. He tries to clamber to escape her advance, but his back connects with the wall behind him and within a second her body is boxing him in, crouching entirely too much into his space.

The villain can feel the warm tears streaking his face, but he doesn’t care enough to stop them. “Please–” It’s all he seems to be able to say right now. “– I didn’t do anything. I just– I’m not– I don’t want to die.”

“I can tell.” The hero scrutinises him, but not cruelly. Her gaze is soft, concern lining her expression. “What’s going on, hm? What’s got you so scared of me? I know I’m a hero but I’m not the scariest guy out there.”

“You– you’re not going to kill me?” The question asks itself before he can stop it, and her eyebrows raise disbelievingly.

“Am I… meant to?” she asks confusedly, and she blanches when the villain’s eyes widen in predetermined terror. “But I won’t! I’m… I’m not going to kill you. Just tell me what’s going on.”

“Everyone’s been trying to kill me.” He brings a hand to wipe at his nose, staring in grief at the red streak that it leaves on his skin. “Something– something’s changed. No one’s aiming to just arrest us anymore. We’re all on– I don’t know, a hit list or something.”

The hero hums. “I know the agency’s been coming down on you guys harder recently. I’m kind of old school though, so I’ve stuck to my ways. Other people seem to have taken the new orders more to the extreme.” She pulls a tissue out from her pocket, tipping his head back to start wiping some of the blood off his face. He flinches at the contact, but she just tightens her grip on him to keep him steady. “I assume you’ve met some of them.”

“Yeah…” is all he can be bothered to say, and the two of them fall into a not quite tense silence. The hero carries on gently cleaning what she can of the blood, and the villain sits with obvious nervous rigidness as she works.

“Some of the heroes are poor excuses of morality. I think they just wanted an excuse to go around punching people,” she says lightly once she’s finished, scrunching the now crimson tissue into a ball. “If you come across them and they give you a hard time, you just let me know, okay?”

“How do you expect me to–” The villain is cut off as she presses a piece of paper into his hand.

“Just call,” is all she says. She turns to disappear back down the street without another word, leaving him sitting there – miraculously alive and relatively unharmed. She even tried to help.

He unfolds the paper, careful not to stain it red, letting his eyes trace over the numbers inside. He’s lived his life in fear of the heroes, of what their agency lets them get away with. But he has a protector from the inside now. Maybe at some point he’ll be able to go outside without always looking over his shoulder.

[the-a-j-universe]

I genuinely think that the fucking swing gets more screentime than Ino or Tenten. Especially if you include filler. And also, I think Kishi is good at writing female characters, but only when he forgets that they are girls. Seriously Sakura was amazing in the time between the start of pt2 and when she saw Sauske again. And then well... she saw Sasuke.

Yes thank you. Like, the swing is iconic. I see it and I feel, like, a thousand things at once, but it's not a character. He makes all of these characters so memorable so quickly, at least in most cases, and then he doesn't do anything with a third of them 90% of the time, and that third is suspiciously usually each team's token girl. Ino is interesting on her own, but her inner dialogue, out of combat, is about boys or rivalries over boys, and she's the one on her team that knows medical jutsu, just like Sakura. And Hinata, when she's not pining or being the literal best, is just Neji light, for when the Byakugan needs to be in this scene, but it can't be attached to anybody who's more than just kinda strong.

But then, until they see Sasuke again, Sakura is legit the viewpoint character, and she's wonderful the entire time, arguably more interesting than Naruto for a large chunk.

And then she just recedes into the background again as soon as Sasuke pops up unless something needs punched or unpunched, or someone needs to pine for Sasuke in a way that Karin or Naruto can't. It's exactly like you said: if the narrative is actively reminding him "hey, that's right, this person is girl" then they all just kinda devolve into the same loose pile of, like, six or seven tropes.

Even Hinata's pining for Naruto is just Sakura's pining for Sasuke, except that Naruto and Hinata is actually a good pairing. And Hinata actually has a reason for liking Naruto.

At the very least, even at his worst, I feel like he does have a reasonable grasp of his characters' voices, so they still feel like themselves, even when they aren't doing anything, but it is still so frustrating seeing Sakura going from the woman who convinced an old bigot to believe in peaceful cooperation, who ran at the four-tailed nine tails cloak Naruto and begged him to let her be the one to save Sasuke so he wouldn't have to keep hurting himself, back to the lovestruck schoolgirl standing in the background. Especially when well-written Sakura is a contender for best character in the entire series.

And it doesn't help that I just find Sasuke to be extremely boring. Just so dull. I don't get what the girls see in him, and I don't get why Naruto even likes him so much, beyond just being staunchly against giving up on people. The most interesting thing he ever did was realize his mistakes so hard that, by Boruto, he's content to just do whatever his people need until it kills him.

[princess-rising-chaos]

This post sucks.

Like, what are you expecting them to do? Unpunch you? Make their child miraculously not have behavioural problems? Obviously you'd want them to apologise, but It's not a screenshot of the entire e-mail so as far as we know maybe they did.

Whether they did or didn't though, all this post does is make fun of them for trying out ways to correct the behaviour. They are clearly communicating what they are doing as well as their suspected cause of the problem. They are clearly putting effort into fixing this, and they are rewarded by being made fun of on twitter and now tumblr too.

And part of the mockery is because the proposed solution sounds silly. What a great joke! Next we'll make fun of those college kids for wanting safe spaces or emotional support animals. Isn't it a funny old world where everyone is so sensitive? fuck off.

Kids are complicated, unpredictable, and volatile. It sucks that this happened, and all apologies should have been made and any requested compensation provided, but posting it on twitter to make fun of them is a shit move. The guy deserves to be fired for it, just like every other professional who tries to roast the people they should be helping for internet clout.

[badragonplays]

DragonFinds has a new boxset today. I got a copy of the DND3e miniatures starter box. it's missing the adventure book but most of the punchouts are still unpunched and everything else is accounted for.

[autistic-crypt1d]

Season 5 SGA live blogging:

S1, S2, S3, S4

Big ass cliffhanger, Teyla is still being held captive by Michael and the team is racing against the clock to find her before she gives birth only to have a damn building fall on them!

Updates:

- Ronon calling Sheppard buddy 😭

- good lord that was a long ass zoom out

- Ronon and Teyla love eachother so much dude

- "you don't have to do everything yourself" facts Ronon, facts

- awww Rodneyyyyy

- Ronon carrying Teyla and her baby is just so AHHHHH

- HOW DARE YOU REPLACE SAM

- OH NO, THE SEED

- I don't remember how Keller got infected in the first place, during the rescue op for Sheppard, Ronon, Rodney, and Lorne?

- Carson!!

- ahhhhh yeah it was that planet

- I missed Teyla so muchhhh

- poor Sheppard y'all

- it always gets me watching Ronon pace around aggressively when something is hurting people that he can't fight. You can literally see him wanting to punch whatever it is no matter what it is or the fact that it is unpunchable

- of course Rodney stays with Sheppard ♡

- also, does this mean that all wraith hive ships are people??

- love how Woolsey is immediately and very rudely awakened to the reason why "going by the book" on Atlantis does not work

- shouldn't the stuff be attacking Sheppard now that he's cured?

- well, now it is

- did the vine stab Sheppard or just break a rib or something?

- Broken Ties, if this is the episode I think it is I'm about to be very sad

- I love seeing Ronon and Teyla together so much

- Ronon's jacket is so cool

- wait no I think the episode I'm thinking of is one of the last 2

- for all of his faults, I really so love how understanding Woolsey is when it comes to Teyla and her baby

- oof ok I remember what this episode is now and while it isn't the one that I thought it was, I will still be very sad

- Tyre you're a back stabbing little shit and I hate you

- DAMN IT TYRE

- Woolsey really does become quite sweet in SGA

- Rononnnnn AHHHHHHH

- of course Sheppard is the person Rodney goes to when he gets stuck

- Lorne!!!

- Ronon's voice on the verge of tears, BRO

- Kanaan, supportive husband of the year

- WOOLSEY WITH THE BABY PFFFT

- Tyre gets points for helping them get Ronon back but I still hate him for everything else

- let's go Rononnnnn

- Ronon truly looks very coo coo bananas here

- god the acting is so good

- Rodney talking to Ronon while he's unconscious recovering 😭

- Ronon holding the sword after Sheppard gave it to him, AHHHHHH

- ah crap, The Daedalus Variations, this is one of the few episodes that I immediately know by title

- I always wanna yell "DON'T GET ON THAT SHIP!!!"

- The duplicate bodies, AHHHHH

- is Ronon wearing a cardigan? It's fantastic regardless

- I love Rodney's little rectangle backpack so much

- the alternate reality drive is reminding me of the spore drive from Star Trek: Discovery, I still need to finish that

- ok it's not a cardigan but the cut is very similar and I dig it

- Ronon is so good at talking Teyla through stuff

- this other alien race intrigues me so much

- how tf did that dart just zoop through the shield??

-poor Sheppard being the only one who actually knows how to operate the ship in any significant way, Teyla knows a bit but that's it

- Ronon really has a 6th sense y'all

- good lord it takes a lot to down those aliens!

- I wish we got to see more of them so badly. Maybe if we'd gotten another season?

- ahhhh Ronon and Sheppard are the most badass duo ever istg

- poor Ronon y'all, he is not prepared for operating this shit

- since when does Atlantis have F-302s? I mean I know this is an alternate reality but like, you'd assume they'd be jumpers

- alternate reality Atlantis came in clutch tho

- not Sheppard basically flirting with himself XD

- Sheppard and his ds, I love it

- the way Rodney absolutely adores Torren even though he's simatioualy terrified of him is so cute

- I wish we got to see more of the alien fauna so badddd

- Ghost in the Machine, oh boy

- Atlantis going dark is always so freaky and cool

- AHHHHH the Elizabeth episodes always hurt so bad y'all

- I really don't understand why replicators want to ascend so bad, they can live forever, why not just go explore the galaxy now? Why do they need to do it as energy?

- I hate that Elizabeth has this arc

- YOU TELL EM WOOLSEY

- ouch ouch ouch

- The Shrine, ouch ouch ouch

- y'all this episode breaks my heart

- Rodney calling for John, OUCH

- AHHH you can see the organism in the water!!!!

- I know the water would've come through too, but couldn't they have just gotten back into the water and they open the shield just long enough for them to swim through???

- Rononnnnnn, he's so caring and sweet and AHHHH

- the whole thing with Jennifer hurts, Rodney tells her he loves her and she has to watch him fade away

- I don't really understand why the jumpers can't be cloaked while going through the gate, the only reason I can think of is that they made it up to make it difficult

- y'all Rodney coming to John on the verge of tears, desperately coming to him for comfort breaks my heart

- GIVING HIM HIS JACKET

- "you're stuck with me Rodney" HELP

- Sheppard loves that arrogant, whiney man so much

- "I keep seeing a face, everytime I close my eyes. I think it's my mother" BRO

- Keller has come such a long way, I mean she went from a flailing mess on the Bola Kai episode to proposing brain surgery in a damp cave to remove an alien parasite

- Whispers is so cool, it freaks me the hell out, but still cool af. Everytime I see the intro though I think of the SG-1 episode where they can't sleep or they die

- also, love seeing Carson again

- Porter and Mehra irritate me so much though. When characters are supposed to be tough but are either written badly, acted badly, or both, it's just so bad. Same thing with characters that are supposed to be hot, like, yuck.

- pfffft, Sheppard and Carson bonding over being in stasis pods

- I really like Vega though, and Teldy is cool

- I also desperately hate the weird thing between Porter and Carson, like, it makes me WILDLY uncomfortable

- god damn that was a clean ass transition

- VEGA DIES???? BRO

- Mirellus I swear to god

- THE CRAWLING ON THE WALL, HELL NO

- these things are so scary y'all, I love it

- honestly Mirellus, you deserved that. Not only did you release these things but you started screaming about them, like, wtf

- he really could've just grabbed the rope to bring up the bucket instead of using the crank, then used it to lower it the rest of the way

- poor Carson, his first mission back and he gets this

- see Mehra is great when she's being a bit goofy, but the whole dead pan serious tough as nails thing is so bad. I've never once enjoyed a character like that unless they had something else going on. Like, Teal'c and Ronon have personalities on top of that. I just think she was written badly honestly.

- The Queen, oh boy this episode is wild

- I truly do not understand the whole surgery thing. What exactly are they doing to her and how tf is it not permanent or leaving any lasting effects???

- Ronon's little smile at saying they were getting their asses kicked is so cute

- at least they finally got a new actor to play the Primary wraith queen

- ahhhh Ronon loves her so muchhhh

- oooo and new actors to play the wraith dudes too! Let's goooooo

- nice work Teyla, god damn

- Todd, buddy, you're really pushing it rn

- it will never stop being hilarious that Ronon has to get stunned like 8 times to go down

- Teyla is the tiniest wraith I've ever seen and it's so funny

- Tracker, very exciting, I kinda love this eoisode

- Sheppard is so totally jealous about Rodney and Keller

- AH I hate the awkward tension between the 3 sooooo much

- Rodney, Ronon, please be normal for like t seconds please

- the thing I hate about this episode is that they suddenly bring back the thing between Ronon and Keller. They don't mention it for a long ass time and their interactions don't hint to it whatsoever and now all the sudden he's into her again

- also the fact that it's so obvious Ronon loves Teyla so the whole Keller thing is just super weird

- it's weird they don't have a life signs detector with them, or maybe Keller has it

- Ronon and Rodney are both like obsessed with Sheppard (for different reasons), but it's hilarious that when they're without Sheppard, they're just a mess of a duo. Like they cannot agree on anything, they're constantly bickering, it's a mess

- idk about y'all, but I ship Keller with Kyrik more than anyone else

- GET HIS ASS KELLER

- Kyrik is awesome man, I'm really sad we never see him again

- ahhh I hate the awkward love triangle shitttt

- DANIEL!!! First Contact is one of my favorite episodes, I'm so excitedddd

- Daniel and Rodney are so funny together, I love it

- pfffft, Rodney telling him to push against the wall as hard as he could XD

- good lord that attempted speech interaction was awkward as hell

- poor Woolsey XD

- god damn the hyperspace window opening over the water is SO COOL

- I may not like these Asgaurd but they are so damn cool, the way they just completely ignore every effort Atlantis tries to stop them is wild. Shield? Ignored, floors between them and their goal? Going through them. Gun fire? Shields.

- THEY'RE SO BADASS

- the way that the 3rd just no hesitation sacrifices itself so the other 2 can get away with the guys and the device???

- poor Sheppard man, he's been in charge for only like a couple hours and they've been invaded and 2 of their people are taken

- god those two are so sassy I love it

- AHHHH Sheppard and Rodney thinking the same thing is so gay I love it

- the self destruct feature so that no one can find out what they really are??? AHHHH

- y'all, the existential crisis Todd has thinking about who the wraith would be without the war is devastatinggggg

- pfffft Daniel and his immediate urge to talk it out with his kidnappers

- those knockout sticks Todd has are so cool wtf

- the power spike, AHHHH CHILLS

- Sheppard staying with Radek no matter what, he's such a good leader y'all

- the explosion FX is not great lol

- oh shit I forgot this was a 2 parter

- I recognize the travers lady from somewhere

- omfg Rodney stepping between Daniel and the gun, BRO

- oh right she was on One Tree Hill!!

- yeah idk how anyone could ship Ronon and Keller in my opinion, they clash so badly personally wise

- good lord that engineering room gives me and Zelenka anxiety

- PFFFT THE SASSY HEAD BOB RONON GIVES WHEN HE SAYS NO

- THE ASGARD REVEAL

- I can't help but wonder if the war would've ended differently if instead of hiding, the Asgard had helped the Ancients

- man Daniel is really getting tossed around today

- ahhhh I missed Daniel's silly little mannerisms so much

- Keller with a P-90 is dope af, way to go doc

- I'm like 90% sure those "empty suits" had people in them cuz I could kinda see them swaying a bit and I think that's hilarious

- Daniel looks cool af in that suit

- pffft Daniel's little shrug

- Daniel please stop standing right by the damn antenna you're giving me anxiety

- LET'S GO SHEPPARD AND TRAVELER'S

- Daniel you really cannot die again

- "wanna unzip me?" "I'll look for a can opener" PFFFFT

- Ronon may be very emotionally intelligent when it comes to other people's feelings, but when it comes to his own, NOPE

- of course Rodney and Daniel are immediately sassy with eachother now that they're not about to die

- Rodney, please

- Outsiders is such an infuriating episode y'all, the way the villagers turn against these innocent people is just so AHHH

- Jervis I hate you so much, please shut up

- Jervis you are actually like, the worst

- the fact that he thinks that there is even a chance the wraith will keep their word and not destroy their village anyway means he is a damn fool

- Safaris you are also the worst and a fool and I hate you too

- Todd is literally the only wraith we've seen to my knowledge that's actually ever kept his word but even then he steals shit or throws wrenches in the plan every single time

- ok Rodney left out the time they did in fact escape from one of those cells but Ronon had like 80 knives on him that allowed that to happen sooooo

- wraith facial hair is so scrungly looking

- LET'S GO CARSON

- dude has become such a badass since he came back to life

- "you're gonna have to hold them off" "am I now?" PFFFT

- PFFFFT Carson and Rodney shoved into the dart is hilarious

- oh damn

- way to go Rodneyyyyy

- awww, Carson realizing Rodney misses him and taking a break for him 😭

- Inquisition, I have no recollection of this episode so far

- oh wait, oh yeah no I remember this

- honestly the counsel isn't entirely wrong, but they've been trying their best to fix their mistake and they're the best hope this galaxy has of defeating the wraith

- plus the fact that they woke them up early led to the infighting which gave them the advantage to defeat them

- why're they showing clips of the wraith that was converted long after Michael with the consent of the queen instead of Michael's transformation when that's what they were talking about?

- y'all they are fully tripping if they think the Genii's nuclear plan was going to defeat the wraith, there are far too many for them to have succeeded with a plan like that. Working with Atlantis there could've been a really helpful alliance but instead they decided to betray them again and again

- Atlantis has been making a lot of unilateral decisions yes, but like they said, they're the only ones out there fighting them. The ancients failed and there was no one left with the tech or numbers to stand up to them until the expedition showed up

- a lot of their plans have made things worse in some ways, but that's what happens when you're taking action, you can't be sure how things will turn out most of the time but you have to do something

- SG-1 got shit for this too about how they went about fighting the Goa'uld, but again, they were trying. Granted so were the Tok'ra, but they were also letting people die, leaving worlds enslaved, and had completely written off the Jaffa

- not to mention the fact that they've been expending countless resources giving aid to every society in need they come across, most of the time with zero in return

- these people revere the ancients as gods even though they were quite literally the cause of the wraith and replicators existing and abandoned the pegasus galaxy when they realized they couldn't atop the wraith, but now they put the expedition on trial for accidentally stumbling across what they left??? It's not their fault that the ancients left a damn minefield of awful shit across the whole damn galaxy

- I just noticed that Ronon had to physically drag Sheppard away when Elizabeth was sacrificing themselves

- I know that these people are upset but if they didn't wake them and they had those 50 years to prepare, the lives would've been lost anyway, different lives but lives nonetheless. At least with Atlantis here they have the chance to win and save future generations from this ever happening again

- Woolsey you sly dog

- LET'S GO WOOLSEYYYY

- Pfffft wtf was that swivel John XD

- The Prodigal, oh shit here we go

- see, Rodney and Sheppard are literally always spending time together

- I feel for Rodney with the stairs y'all, they are my sworn enemy

- Teyla is so pretty

- god damn it Michael

- damn that door lowering shot was pretty sick gotta say

- Lorne!!!

- Michael's obsession with Teyla is horrifying, he truly does not understand why she won't just go with him

- LET'S GO BANKS

- we don't get a lot of Chuck and Banks but I ADORE THEM, especially her

- YOU GET THEIR ASSES RONON

- Ronon may have technically lost that fight but he gave Teyla the opportunity to run and that's a win in this situation, especially given the fact that that buys them all time

- god I love Sheppard and Rodney during these situations "what do you need? 15 minutes?" And Rodney just rolls his eyes and does it

- Teyla is so resourceful and smart, she can't fight because she's holding a baby but you bet your ass she can kick that mf down the stairs

- the jumpers chairs look so comfy, I want one

- MICHAEL YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH, TEYLA IS A WONDERFUL MOTHER

- YOU STEP AWAY FROM RONON RIGHT NOW

- yessss let's go Radek!!!

- ooooo the fight scene is coming!!!!

- it's soooo over for you Michael

- Sheppard what did I say about hanging off of towers

- MY GOD THIS SCENE IS SO COOL

- YES TEYLA BEAT HIS ASS

- you tried to hurt her baby, you were never getting out of here alive

- god Teyla is so cool help

- Ronon's mission report is so cute

- Remnants, poor Sheppard man, I'm stressed and it's been 2 seconds, I just knw what's about to happen to this man

- also, Rodney's immediate flustered reaction as to why Sheppard would volunteer to spend a night away from Atlantis (him) is so gay I love it

- y'all watching this episode knowing what's actually going on from the start is wild, especially from Sheppard's pov. Bro really just could not help torturing himself

- poor Chuck

- also, have the uniform colors changed a bit? Chuck's looks like a weird dark green and Rodney's is a different blue than I remember. I feel like this must have happened when they changed the uniform style but idk why I'm just noticing.

- are Amelia and Chuck both military???

- ugh, Brain Storm. Malcolm is the worst.

- I hate that they did Bill Nye so dirtyyyy

- the fact that Keller doesn't trust Rodney's instincts that this is a horrible idea is WILD

- "you're smarter than me" "I know" DAMN RIGHT RODNEY

- PFFFFT the Bill Nye slap

- LET'S GO RODNEY

- "I love you. Have for some time now." CALLBACK LET'S GOOOO

- Infection, see now this is the episode I though Spoils of War was initially. This episode is so freaky I love it

- I originally was remembering it as being caused by the Hoffan virus but it's Keller's treatment, I remember now

- the wall melting, SO COOL

- THE MASKLESS WRAITH WARRIORS

- I still ship Rodney and Sheppard, but I will still admit that Rodney and Keller are sweet

- my god the wraith eating people is just such a new horrific thing

- SO FREAKY AHHH

- the massive crater in the ship is so cool

- THE SHIP BEING INFECTED, AHHH SO COOL!!!

- I love wraith shit so much, it's so unique and so cool and freaky

- "we're too late, the pods are opened" AHHHH

- oh my god I love this scene, the hive tearing in half, Rodney freaking out, they're going down y'all!!!

- "impact in 15 seconds" "not if I can help it" AHHHHH

- THE SHIP ENTERING THE ATMOSPHERE, THE TENSION!!!!

- the cgi of the shop landing in the water is rough af but still

- Identity, ah hell I hate this episode

- poor Radek, he was just trying to help

- Vegas is such a weird episode

- Vegas feels like such a random place for them to be, the wraith being there I can understand, but why are John and Keller?

- man I remember watching this episode for the firs time so vividly

- the scene where the wraith is disguising himself is so cool, but also like totally confirmation that wraith would be emo, punk, or goth if they were on earth lmao

- a wraith playing poker will never not be funny

- and the damn finger conversation

- god this chase is so cool, taking the gunfire like it was nothing, leaping down the stairs, thr wall vault, and god damn that no hesitation leap off the roof only to stand back up after slamming into the pavement, AHHHHHH

- SHEPPARD'S FACE

- there is not a single reality where this mf doesn't get dragged into this shit somehow is there

- Rodney!!!!

- alternate reality Todddddd

- I guess Keller was there cuz the government sent her and she was brought back from Atlantis too? Idk

- I'm sorry but an emo wraith wielding dual machine guns is so cool

- rip John

- wait stop this is sad I hate it, his face when he lies down just broke my heart

- ENEMY AT THE GATE, LET'S GOOOOO

- I'm so excited, I may hate that the show ends like this, but my god are these episodes so cool

- I'm honestly shocked the finale isn't a 2 parter

- pfffft Todd in a Deadalus jump suit is so silly, they unfashioned him

- LET'S GO DAEDALUS

- Sam!!!!

- Atlantis is leaving the Pegasus Galaxy y'all!!!

- Davis!! Loved that guy in SG-1

- ah hell the converstaion between Woolsey, Teyla, and Ronon makes me tear up

- one would think they would've adapted some of the shield technology they've come across and used it to defend where the chair was being held in case of something like this. I get they can't protect the whole planet with it but they could at least cover that

- rip chair and area 51

- Sheppard's on yet another suicide mission

- oh shit this is the episode with Ronon that makes me cry

- RONON 😭

- Teyla and Rodney's yells for him break my heart y'all

- I love you random ass wraith for saving Ronon ♡♡♡

- Lorne supporting Ronon, ahhhhhh

- ATLANTIS LET'S GOOOOOO

- KICK THAT HIVES ASS CARSON!!!

- "it's Atlantis, they're engaging the hive!" CHILLS

- AHHHHH

- y'all I'm tearing up this is so cool

- "This is my home" AHHHH

- Ronon is so awkward when he thinks someone is cute I love it

- if it has to be someone other than Teyla, I'm glad it's Banks

- I'm gonna cry, I love this show so much 😭

I hope you enjoyed reading these live blogs, it made me really happy to do it 💛

[andwaitforthespark]

Wake Me Up Sirius is hands down the most punchable Sirius.

idk seems unpunchable to me

[dreamybasil]

unpunches you

yippeh

[undeserved-halo]

Okay freakblr has been taking up so much of my brain space I basically infodumped all the rp blog lore and the inside jokes onto my girl bestie and he sympathizes with you and says you deserve justice for all the bullying i gave you and that socks with tights are valid.

I punched him for that last one

unpunch him right now also yes justice for me

[lizardsfromspace]

...so I may have just totally punched Houdini, 'cause he thought he could like, escape from gettin' punched, and it turns out magic isn't capable of unpunching yourself, but like, Magic Spoon is capable of helping you have fun with breakfast every

Wait...where am I...? I don't have my Magic Spoon...I just hear howlin' wind without my Rayconns...everything's so dark...I've been raided...my god...I'm famous and I'm in the darkness...those bastards...they raided a shadow legend...