#unless you wanna be rude or mean and then you can just fuck off

[astrow1zar6]

Astro Observations~ 48

Venus square Pluto men tend to have a really weird relationship with women. Can have a big love-hate relationship when it comes to women. I’ve seen these men treat their guy friends with more respect than their partners

Leo sun x Pisces sun mix in friendship is so underrated. They really match eachothers creativity & can inspire eachother a lot art wise

Jupiter in the 1st house makes someone very jolly naturally. Even if they are in a bad mood it rarely shows. Can also make someone pretty tall in a lot of cases (not all)

Cap risings can have very visible bones. Could’ve been told by others to “eat a sandwich “

You can feel more likely to create art or sing when the moon transit is in Pisces (even if you’re not the type to want to do that stuff on the regular).

Venus in the 8th house natives are very into hookup culture. Gets into a lot of unconventional relationships. Not really the types that wanna be “wifed up” I’ve noticed. They just here for a good time fr.

Pisces sun Aries moons are great manifestors (especially with an earth rising to stabilize the energy) with a cap rising for example I can imagine these people to be unstoppable when they have a goal.

Mars in Taurus’s usually prefer slower sex to fast sex. (Unless it’s in the 8th house) they are super sensual and want to enjoy every pleasure to the max. Going too fast can piss them off/leave them unsatisfied.

Venus in 2nd house synastry can have very long make out sessions together. Even if you aren’t comfortable with kissing this aspect will make you want to kiss them for HOURS.

Saturn in the 8th house people on the other hand kinda lack sensuality a lot of the time. They can skip foreplay and go straight to the act. Very “cold” sexual experiences.

Juno in the 1st house people are the best people to marry. Can attract some pretty selfish partners tho unfortunately:(

When a Gemini Venus has a crush on someone it’s like painfully obvious. Everyone usually already knows.

Jupiter in the 8th gives big 🍆 energy

Uranus in the 5th house are rarely ever fully single. The types to go on a lot of dates or dates someone outta nowhere or unexpectedly

Saturn in the 5th house have a natural awkwardness around their crushes

Venus in Libras pull game is so strong, they have so many admirers & ppl who have crushes on them

Having a Venus in retrograde in a detriment sign (Aries/scorpio) can make you come off as really rude to others or super vain

I also notice if not severely afflicted Venus in retrograde natives actually have a higher chance of marrying their soulmates than direct Venus natives

Taurus moons either have very a sloppy basic asf sense of fashion or its super chic & creative as hell no in between.

Lilith dominant women are usually treated like shit by other women a lot. Men can see them as someone they just wanna hook up with. It’s actually really sad what these people go thru.

Most fucked up friendship award goes to Pluto in the 11th house folks. Friends could’ve been really jealous of you or your relationship with other friends. Ur friends could also lack extreme boundaries with you and almost act more like a toxic partner. Friends get super obsessed & possessive of you!

Sun in the 9th house people have a gift usually for learning new languages. Could be the types to speak multiple languages.

Pisces mars can be super lazy. Could be the types to ask you to grab the the remote when it’s right next to them

Jupiter in the 4th house prevents you from being homeless. Regardless of your income you always tend to find a really spacious cute home.

People with a 10th house stellium are more likely to “fall in love” with their career. They are also really love $$.

Sun in the (1st, 5th & 11th) house people usually thrive in big social settings.

Sun in the 2nd house could be the breadwinners of the family. Could’ve been the first to break a poverty generational curse. Usually seen as the ones who “made it out the hood” iyk what I mean.

Venus in 2nd house natives face cards are LETHAL

[hannibals-favourite-meal]

Hi 👋🏻 Lou!! Congratulations 🎊🎉 on 6k!!

So how about Arranged Marriage w/ Simon?

Again congrats to 6k 🙃💛🦡

.⋆｡Give 'Em Hell｡⋆.

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x plus size reader

Your parents think you need to get married and settle down, so they called in a favour. A big military man of a husband might do you some good just not in the way they think

Warnings: arranged marriage, sort of sugar baby/daddy relationship, misogynist parents, future revenge, mention of hook-ups WC: 986

6k Follower Celebration Bingo

Library- @hannibals-favourite-meal-library

You often wondered about the true scope of your family’s stupidity. Sure, there were moments in your childhood where you had the vivid thought that no one could be as ignorant and blatantly idiotic as your parents were but somehow, they had absolutely hit rock bottom of moronic decisions.

“What the fuck do you mean I’m getting married?” Your mother gasped.

“Watch your tone young lady, that is no way to speak to your parents.” She scolded as your father’s expression hardened. There was no question that your parents were ‘traditional’ believing that women were less than their male counterparts in every way but while they had constantly lectured you on those beliefs, they hadn’t gone so far as to inflict them upon you, until now at least. They even helped you and encouraged you through college!

“You’ve been running wild long enough, it’s time for you to do your duty,” you fought the urge to roll your eyes, “We’ve let you chase your silly little dreams but you’re getting older and your clock is ticking.” Your father clicked his tongue and reached for the tumbler of expensive bourbon on the table beside his recliner.

“We’ve picked out a good man!” Your mother chirped from her place on the expensive love seat next to your father, “He’s highly decorated in the military, he can give you a good life.”

“I don’t give a shit about that! I’m not marrying anybody! Period!” You snarled. Anger curled in your gut, turning your tone sour.

Your father’s glass slammed down onto the wood, making your mother flinch. “You will marry him or I will make your life a living hell. I make one call and no one will want to hire you, not even as a fucking garbage collector. You know the connections I have. Suck it up and be a responsible adult for once.” 

——————

“I don’t want a husband.” The man across from you made a sound that you thought might have been a laugh. Simon, as you had learned from your parents, was a Lieutenant in a special ops task force. Never married, no family to speak of and copious amounts of money, your mother had gleefully added as she literally dragged you into the official-looking building where you would be meeting your future spouse.

He was by all means, an intimidating man. Almost 6 and a half feet tall and wearing a stupid balaclava with a skull on it, he looked more fitting being in a slasher movie than in a conference room negotiating marriage stipulations. His bulky, tattooed arms were crossed over his chest, somehow making him seem even bigger to you, as he leaned back in his chair.

“I don’t want a wife.” Your eyebrows furrowed at that. 

“Then why are you here?” 

His massive shoulders rolled back as his head tilted, cracking his neck. “Same as you— orders.” You hummed under your breath and forced your gaze away from his tanned arms and up to his eyes. He was obviously a quiet man but in no way did that intimidate you. He seemed more pissed off at your father who had so rudely guided (shoved) you into the room than he did at you.

You cleared your throat. “I won’t fuck you.” This time, his laugh was more discernible. His broad chest rumbled with the sound.

“‘M not expecting you to, not unless you beg,” you made a face at him but Simon continued, “I get deployed most of the time, I’d just like someone to take care of the house and spend my money.”

“So I would be your sugar baby.” He shrugged.

“If that’s what ya wanna call it. Do what cha want, I don’t care. We just need to show up to official events together.” 

You planted your elbows on the table between you and stared into his brown eyes. Simon didn’t waver. “So you wouldn’t have an issue with me getting a job?”

“None.” He answered quickly.

“Going back to school?”

“I’d happily pay for it.” You raised an eyebrow before a devious smirk crossed your lips.

“Get a lover?” His eyes blazed while he mirrored your position, the swivel chair beneath him groaning with his mass as he leaned forwards, planting his massive palms onto the table.

“I’d like to see you try.” Against your will, heat raced through your body, setting your nerves alight with the thrum of arousal.  Simon’s mask shifted and you imagined that he was smirking at you. 

You tamped down the feeling of wetness between your soft thighs, forcing yourself to remember exactly why you were in this situation in the first place. “You’re a lot different than I was expecting.”

He huffed. “So are you. Thought I was getting stuck with some bratty trust fund baby who’s never even set foot in a thrift store.”

“I thought you were gonna be a crusty old man who wanted me to put out so he could feel better about his broken dick and receding hairline.” Silence settled between you before suddenly, you both broke into peels of laughter, an oppressive weight suddenly lifted from the room. 

You were relieved; Simon seemed at least like a decent human being if nothing else and it appeared that you could continue living your life, although without the occasional hook up here and there. But considering how handsome you presumed your almost husband to be, maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing.

“I guess we both got lucky didn’t we?” You wiped the tears from your eyes.

“Or just benefitting from the sheer incompetence of the people that thought this was a good idea.” You rolled your eyes at him.

“So, should we do this then?” You asked. Simon rose from his seat and offered you his hand, which you didn’t hesitate to take. As he pulled you to your feet, he uttered:

“Let’s give ‘em hell.”

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[zzbubblegumbitchzz]

Can we have more casual dominance with Quinn? 👉👈

oh my god absolutely, so i feel like this is a discussion real early in the relationship tbh and you bring it up first. i started to ramble

kinda just the “need some extra motivation.” something that can have multiple meanings if you really wanted to dig into it. all for Quinn to respond happily, “that’s easy, baby. i don’t mind doing that at all.” and later that night, you made a daily check list with him. brush your teeth, take your vitamins, eat 3 meals, etc. all those everyday things your brain had a hard time reminding you to do.

Quinn falls into the roll with ease, there’s no hesitation from him. it’s encouraging him that he’s doing this right, especially when he starts to notice you looking to him for more than before.

he hates punishing you, he refuses to really do it. unless it’s absolutely necessary. he knows you’re his good girl, he really does. just sometimes you need a little reminder. he doesn’t mind being stern, forcing you to look at him when he tells you to quit the shit. those reminders usually do the trick too, when they don’t? he’s getting you to talk first. he’s not gonna take you over his knee if there’s an underlying issue. you’re allowed to feel your emotions and if those make you feel angry he’s gonna listen while you talk. but if there’s no underlying problem, he’s still so soft. he’s so sweet, “i know you’ve missed me, i missed you too, but that doesn’t mean you get to be rude. you know better than that. want you on your stomach, gonna get 5 okay? wanna hear you count em for me.”

he loves that you trust him enough to let him answer for you too. like if you’re out with his teammates and the waiter looks to you, you immediately look at Quinn. “she’ll have a shirley temple and pretzels to start, thank you.” and you have heart eyes at him and if he wasn’t forced to be here the whole time he’d take you home and show you how much he loves you.

his friends kinda pick on him at first, think it’s funny how much you depend on Quinn. he kind of explains, Petey understands most he’s seen the day to day with you two and it’s nothing that off. just trust and love. which Petey says too, and Quinn’s like “see? just trust and love.”

i like to think if you’re at the lake house with him, and he has an early morning training he leaves your vitamins, coffee and breakfast in Jacks hands. “i have it all out for her, just remind her to take these and eat. she’ll see you drinking coffee and just grab some but she won’t remember the other things. thank you Jack.” as he’s walking out the door.

he always texts if he leaves before you wake up too. always wants you to know why and where he is and when he’ll be home. he expects the same from you too.

he guides you in public too. hand on the back of your neck, just a soft hold. letting you know he’s here. he fucks hard with you holding his fingers vs his whole hand tbh. makes you look so small to him, and he loves that. his perfect girl.

[xfgpng]

𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐟𝐞 -

— : [ nsfw ] yakuza boss toji, arranged marriage, unprotected sex, loss of virginity, pet names, fluff (he’s very ooc with reader, sue me) + breeding kink and mentions of pregnancy

— : wc : 1.9k

when you were first introduced to the zenin clan, you were shy. your father and the head of the zenin family were close, the alliance going as far back to the early 1920’s.

you didn’t ask any questions and like the good and dutiful daughter you were, accepted from the age of 16 that you would be married into their family. you didn’t have any complaints, your parents and older brothers and sisters were always good to you and you felt honoured that your father had chosen you and not one of your sisters.

now, at 23, you were to be married to one of the sons who would rightfully take over the family business as soon as his grandfather passed on.

toji zenin

just looking at him made you squirm. he was big and intimidating and his smile made you feel like he was in on a joke that you didn’t get. still, he was beyond handsome so you had no complaints.

he was always soft with you, different from how aggressive you’ve seen him be to just about anyone else.

“come sit with me baby” he chuckles, watching you leaning awkwardly against the door to his private home office.

“are you busy?” you ask, walking around the large desk to stand next to his chair.

“never too busy for my wife” he smirks, pulling you to sit on his lap. he kisses your temple and then your cheek as he wraps his arm around you.

you can tell that he is actually busy. he has his laptop open and there are stacks of money packed in neat piles on the floor next to his desk.

“couldn’t sleep?” he asks, rubbing your arms softly. it wasn’t necessarily cold in his office but it was cold in the house and the big bed felt empty without your husband.

“not without you” you admit and he laughs. it’s not to mock you, he never makes you feel stupid for your feelings despite everyone telling you how mean and rude he was. you didn’t care, he treated you just fine.

“i’m sorry sweetheart” he sighs, “i’m almost done here”

“toji…” you say, trailing off. you’ve been thinking about this for a month now and you weren’t sure if he was just being nice or if he was just keeping you around to save face.

“what is it?” he asks, turning his laptop off to give you his full attention. he did feel bad for not sleeping with you but he was a busy man and he was still a newlywed. he wasn’t sure how to handle these things all at once.

“i just… do you not want me?” you ask, frowning slightly. you don’t mean to sound so desperate but you were married after all and he hadn’t even…

“what, where is this coming from?” he asks and he seems confused. he turns you in his lap so he can see your face. you really were so cute when you looked so shy.

“you haven’t tried to touch me” you pout, “i know you’re far more experienced than i am but i thought you’d —”

“y/n” he cuts you off, cupping your face gently, “i’ve wanted to fuck you since we were teens”

“hey!”

he laughs, kissing you. you really were the sweetest thing.

“i know you’re a virgin, i would never want to force you into anything unless you’re ready” he says, “and besides”

you look into his eyes and he’s smirking again.

“i’m big, i don’t wanna hurt you” he’s so smug and you’d slap him if you weren’t interested in finding out just how big.

you squirm in his lap, moving your hips against him and he grabs your waist.

“watch it” he narrows his eyes, “i’ll take that as an invitation”

“take me to bed toji-san” you flatter your pretty lashes at him and his jaw clenches. he really couldn’t give a fuck about finishing any work tonight.

“mark your words baby” he warns, scooping you up and heading towards your bedroom.

you kiss his neck, sucking marks into it. you weren’t always like this but you’ve seen the way people look at him and even though he was all yours, you had no problem reminding them that toji was a married man. he was off the market. he was yours.

he grins, titling his head to the side to give you more access and you moan, biting down. he grunts, slapping your ass before laying you down gently on your expensive silk sheets.

“i didn’t know my wife was so slutty” he scoffs, pulling his sweater off in one swift motion. the way he looks standing over you, big and bulky has you squeezing your thighs together.

he licks his lips, pulling your legs apart and leaning down to kiss the inside of your thighs.

“let me get you nice and ready for me yeah?” he bites your thigh in retaliation from your own marking and you gasp, legs falling open wider.

your pretty silk panties are damp and he looks up at you with a smirk.

“that excited for me already baby?” he teases, just to see you try to cover your pretty face with your pillow.

he kisses the inside of your thighs, watching as goosebumps arise. you were so sensitive and he liked that a lot about you. he reaches up to pull your panties down, groaning at the sight of your pretty pussy glistening with your arousal.

you knew you were pretty, you’ve never doubted that but the way he looks at you, makes you feel so beautiful. you think your parents made the right choice when it came to toji.

he kisses your clit, earning a soft whimper from you. flattening his tongue against your pussy, he licks a long stripe from your slit to your clit, wrapping his lips around your sensitive bud as he slips a wet finger into your tight pussy.

his thick finger feels different from your own but it’s still so good, so much better than you even imagined and you find yourself moaning louder for him, grinding your pussy against his face.

he grins, adding another finger before scissoring you open. it hurts just a little but you don’t want him to stop, the pain doing nothing to stop the tingling sensation you’re feeling all over your body.

“feels good baby?” he asks, licking his lips as he watches you fall apart beneath him. it’s so sexy, the way you squeeze and pinch your nipples.

you look so disheveled and fucked out and it’s all for him. he feels his cock throb and twitch knowing he will be the only person to ever see you like this.

“i’m ready for you” you whine, “please, i want it”

he’s too weak to deny you anything and it should scare him but he can’t help the chuckle that leaves his mouth. a sweet thing like you had him wrapped around your finger and you probably didn’t even know that yet.

he strokes his cock a little, watching your eyes widen when you see just how big he is. you’ve never had sex before but you weren’t exactly innocent. you’ve seen porn and his dick was a lot bigger than the ones you used to see on your screen.

it has you unconsciously closing your legs.

“don’t hide from me sweetheart” he grins, “it’s all yours you know?”

he’s teasing you but he wasn’t wrong. all of toji belonged to you in the same way you were his.

he’s careful when he rubs his thick and veiny cock through your folds. you’re so wet and it helps ease the tension he felt. he would never hurt you unless you asked him to. he would do whatever you wanted.

“ready?” he asks, rubbing soothing circles into your hips as he leans down to kiss you softly.

“yeah” you gasp, “want you”

you’ve wanted him since you learned what it was like to please yourself. a silly teenager who didn’t know the first thing about sex aside from what you were taught.

he takes his time, pressing into you. the stretch shocks you and it’s almost enough to distract you from the pain but it does hurt. when his tip pops through, you cry out, eyes squeezing shut.

he kisses you gently, whispering praises as he slowly bottoms out. his eyes widen when he looks down and sees the blood. he’s about to pull out when you wrap around legs around him.

he can see you crying but you’re also smiling. he knows it must feel uncomfortable for you but he mirrors your sweet smile.

“you’re so big” you moan, moving your hips on your own and he bites the inside of his mouth. you’re so wet and tight and your velvety walls welcome him home like he belongs.

“don’t” he groans, “please baby, i need a moment”

he slides out slowly, watching your face for any discomfort. he knows how big he is, he’s always taken pride in his body and he can’t help but feel smug about your moans and whines.

he moans, thrusting back into you. he knew it would feel good but this is nothing like he could ever imagine. he doesn’t want to think about the women he’s been with before you.

he was arrogant when he was younger, refusing to get married to you or waiting. he feels like a piece of shit whenever he thinks about you and how loyal you’ve been, despite his reluctance in the beginning.

“more” you beg, gripping his bicep with the hand that wasn’t gripping the sheets below you. your nails make crescent moons in his skin and he knows it’ll leave marks. he hopes it bleeds too, he wants to feel you all over.

he picks up his pace, enjoying the way your moans get louder, the sound of skin slapping against skin is loud and he wonders if everyone in the house can hear you. he hopes so. you sounded so pretty, he would never get enough of you.

“i love you” he gasps, leaning down to kiss you. he feels you smile against his lips before you wrap your arms around his neck.

he slows down and he almost regrets it. he’s so close to busting his load when he hears you whine and then, “put a baby in me” you say, “fuck me full of your cum toji-san”

he bites your shoulder. he really needs to calm the fuck down. everything is so overwhelming and you’re just so perfect it makes him nervous.

he would be lying if he said he hasn’t thought about it. he’s fucked his fist to the idea of breeding you, stuffing your pussy with his cum until it leaks out but he wouldn’t stop, he’d keep going until you passed out.

“y/n” he warns, feeling your clench around him. you were playing a dangerous game and you clearly knew that. perhaps you did know the power you had over him.

“i want your cum” you plead, kissing his jaw and then his cheek, whispering right into his ear, “i wanna feel you for days, please”

he’ll make you regret messing with him like this.

“safe word” he whispers and he’s not sure why he’s even surprised when you don’t look confused or surprised. you smile so sweetly and oh so innocently up at him when you say,

“sōko”

[icarusredwings]

Thinking about Logan and wade being an angel and a demon except theyre whole purpose is to guide Kurt through his life. The thing is though, Kurt dosn't know that Logan is his gaurdian angel. And wade keeps trying to convince kurt to fuck him, While simotainously being in a bad cop good cop partnership with Logan.

Kurt: *staring with sparkly eyes*

Wade, on Kurts shoulder, smirking: Ooooh~ hes cute~ dontcha think?

Kurt: *swallows and crosses his heart*

Wade: ohhh come onnn whats a bit of fantasizing, huh? Besides. Look at those arms. That neck. God you just wanna kiss it dontcha? And those hands-fuck those hands. I bet they'd feel real good wrapped around your-

Logan: Hello father wager.

Kurt: I-IM NOT THINKING IMPURE THOUGHTS

Logan:... okkkaay... are you feeling alright father?

Wade, giggling: You should ask him to call you daddy~

Kurt: NO!- i-i mean... yes. Thank you.

Later, Logan coming into his room sighing heavily, pulling his tie off and undoes his shirt, his wings popping out all majestic and gorgeous: You know... youre starting to be a real pain in my ass...

Wade, flickering his tail, all sprawled out in his bed, naked and giggly: I thought angels weren't allowed to curse?

Logan then sighs, physically takes off his halo (thats a collar/dog tags in this form) and hangs it in the wall, coming to the bed to grab his chin: This aint heaven, now is it darlin?

Wade, giving him the ultimate love eyes as his tail curls into a heart: Bout as close as i'll ever get~

Logan "Gods good little soilder who thinks about giving up heaven to be with wade" Howlett

Wade "Forgive me daddy for I have sucked that soikder dry so many times that I fear his cum might be making me wanna go to heaven." Wilson

Wade: Wait wait wait. Heh- You died HOW?

Logan, red faced and grumbling: ....I drowned...

Wade: HA! What? You grow up in the 1800s? Little victorian boy dont know how to swim?

Logan:.... yes..

Wade: O h... my bad.

Logan: *crosses his arms* So how did you die?

Wade: Railed- By a bus.

Logan: pft-

Wade: Hey hey! Wait! Drowning is so much funnier then getting hit by a bus!

Logan: Was it a playboy bus or somethin?

Wade: ......*tail flickers angerly, pouting*

Logan: Oh my god! No way!

Wade, flustard: H-how does an angel know about playboy anyway!?

Logan: Wait.. so... why do you... n-Not to be rude or anything but-

Wade: .... I didnt die from being hit... I burnt to death.. and then it exploded..

Logan: damn... wait... so how did you become...

Wade: ...*tail hugging himself, insecure*... They categorized me with the bunny girls... said I was gonna spend the rest of eternity begging for it just so I can survive...

Logan: oh....but thats not right? You were just minding your buisness. It's not your fault the driver was distracted.

Wade: *shrugs* ... That's hell for you, honey... they don't exactly give a shit..

Kinda hard to get people to sleep with you so he can not starve to death when people aren't as kind as Logan. (They think he's ugly)

That's how their "deal" starts. Logan lets him get just enough to survive but theres just something different about him that makes him want to stay on this mission, but he cant stay on this mission unless hes telling his higher ups hes "facing a demon" Or evil in general.

So its a win win really. Except Wade thinks Logan wants to stay on earth cause hes in love with kurt, not him.

Logan does love kurt but he cant sleep with him. It would immediately terminate his mission.

As for why Logan just dosnt tell wade he's in love with him, Succubus dont exactly... er... settle down. Esspecially not for angels.

Sure, Logan "feeds him" once a week and is a great energy source, but eventually Wade will surely get bored of him, right? That's what he thinks.

Logan died young. Tried to save a kid from drowning. Failed, obviously.

He was honorably discharged from earth as wade calls it.

Newly enlisted young, maybe barley 23. Being dead ages you though. From how many previous missions he's had, this is certianly his longest. He's highly praised by his bosses.

Wade? No boss. Just tryna have fun and survive.

Now, why would sexy silly funny and smart wade stick around with a man like that? At least, that's what Logan thinks.

That's the difference. Logan HAS to tell his bosses about Wade. How this "devious, devilish fiend" keeps trying to sway his target.

But Wade is just estatic to find someone to finally WANT to look in his eyes and keep the lights ON in bed.

The thing is though, If he tells kurt about wade itll immediately ruin the mission because kurt will assume logan has been lying and try to banish him but itll only get rid of wade, not logan. So unfortunately this is a very much so

"I think Logan only has sex with me to get rid of his frustrations about not being able to sleep with Kurt but you know what? No ones ever kissed me like that or called me beautiful before so i'll deal with it"

And

"AAAAAUUUGGHHH I HATE having to hide wade from people it feels so WRONG and whats wrong with me!? Hes a demon! Angels cant love demons thats like heaven 101!! Jesus- Oop sorry.. sorry. I didnt mean too- nevermind. I just.. Im so torn.. I love them both but I cant love them properly.. Im not allowed to fulfill kurt's desires and I cant ask wade to do it because Ill immediately be fired an-and theyll assign a different angel who WILL kill wade and he'll die and- AAAAAHHHH FUCK!!"

Wade, watching Logan get dressed: You think he'd share?

Logan: Huh?

Wade: Kurt. Once you and him are- yaknow. Hanky pankying around.. you think he'd share?

Logan: Wh-What!? I-im an angel! I dont 'hanky panky' my targets.

Wade, laying on his stomach, kicking his feet in logans bed: Ooh I see. You wanna keep me to yourself, huh? How naughty~

Logan: *coughs to death from embaressment* 💀

Dont get this wrong though, Wade does like Kurt too, and wants him to be happy. He wants kurt to let go and sleep with Logan. While Heaven sees his goals as making a top priest sin, Wade just wants to pull him away from purity culture and wants Logan to be happy too, with the both of them.

"Do you think we're together in every universe?"

"...were not even togethed in this one."

[joonberriess]

𓆩♡𓆪 “you don’t have to admit you wanna play, just let me rock you till the break of day,” – jock!jk

·˚ ༘ 💌 TAGS — simping at its finest, blowjobs, cum-swallowing, degradation, dumbification, jk is mean but also a praise fanatic, oc is a cute puppy who eats it all up, objectification(?) pretty sure bc jk just has unholy thoughts about oc, oc is THEE it girl, dirty talking, messy lil make-outs, thank you kiss on the tip LOL, PET NAME GALORE, oc is a nice lil bimbo everyone loves ❤️ even jk’s friends luv her

Jungkook listened to whatever the hell Jennie was explaining to him, in truth he stopped paying attention like five minutes ago. He sat there like a fried vegetable just zoning out and nodding mindlessly whenever Jennie looked at him and asked if he agreed etc. He didn’t want to be rude to Jennie but any more of this and he’d go insane he fears.

“So for the powerpoint I was thinking we should..” Jennie’s voice slowly fades out as the sound of the front door opening catches Jungkook’s eye/attention. Holy shit he doesn’t believe what he’s witnessing. He doesn’t realize he’s staring hardcore at Jennie’s poor unsuspecting roommate.

He instantly recognizes you as the girl he sees his team/friends go crazy over. You were quite the talk of the campus—cute, slutty, bimbo-like, these were some of the most common things said. If Jungkook had to admit, you were pretty cute and he’s only ever really seen you casually here and there. He finds himself licking his lips slowly and sitting up while clearing his throat.

“Hi Jennie, hi Jennie’s friend.” You sweetly say while waving at Jungkook politely. He gets an eyeful of tits and soft tummy as you pass by.

You’re wearing this soft pink tracksuit and white baby tee crop top which hugs your pretty little tits just nicely. Don’t even get him started about your backside which is enough in itself to bring a tear to his eye. Jungkook doesn’t realize he’s overdoing it with his staring until Jennie clears her throat pretty loudly.

“Ahem.” She glares at him, “As I was saying,” she shoves her laptop in Jungkook’s face.

He doesn’t see more of you because you end up heading down the hall to your room after saying “bye-bye” to both him and Jennie. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” He grunts in annoyance.

“Not my roommate Jeon, you can go about fucking anything that fucking walks and has a hole between their legs but you leave y/n out of your lechery. Got it?” She hisses, “I can see the gears working in that stupid head of yours, so I’m warning you. Now help me with this powerpoint asshole, I’m not doing all the work.”

Jungkook internally groans—overprotective roommate, greaaat.

Whole time he works on the project his mind is filled with obscene thoughts and nasty little daydreams he comes up with just thinking about you. Jungkook’s had his fair share of hook-ups but none have ever truly made him go this crazy before. He’s fucking FIENDING for it, would be on his damn knees begging for you to crush his head with your soft thighs if he could.

Too bad Jennie said you were off-limits though. Unless..

Much to Jungkook’s dismay he doesn’t see you for the remainder of the time he’s there. He does see you more often around campus though, whether it’s you hopping out of your very pink car or you running about all over campus with a pink drink in your hands. He can’t get enough of you, and it’s fucking obvious to his friends who make fun of him for it.

“y/n, Kook? Really?” Yugyeom snorts, “Only in your fucking dreams will you ever hit that, your little guy down there probably wouldn’t even know what to do with all that ass.” Laughter all around them erupts as Yugyeom smugly smirks, happy with himself.

Jungkook rolls his eyes, “You’re so fucking stupid,” more laughing, “honestly, if anyone has more chances it’s me, you’re all either losers AND she’s never bat an eye at you. I don’t see any action from any of you either, all talk and shit.” He mutters while taking a drag from the blunt they were all passing around.

“Not true! y/n is a nice girl Jungkook.” Jimin snorts, “Watch,” he turns around and looks over the area for you, “hey y/n!” He yells while waving his arms. They all wait patiently for your reaction, low and behold you just end up proving Jimin correct.

You look confused at first until you smile brightly, “Hi,” you wave back while walking over, “what are you guys up to?” You tilt your head, lips pursed in a adorable little pout.

“Smoking.” Yugyeom replies curtly, “Want some?” He holds the blunt out to you.

Jungkook doesn’t know why but that shit irks the fuck out of him, he shoots his friend a glare and fans the smoke out of your direction before it can hit you. You smell like chai mixed with pumpkin, and he definitely does NOT want to ruin your pretty smell.

“No thank you,” you politely reply and then turn to look at Jimin again, “ ‘m a little sad though, because this morning I tried to make waffles but I didn’t know you had to actually pull the lever down and I didn’t get to eat my waffles.” You sigh wistfully, “See?” You hold out the raw and cold waffles wrapped up in a napkin, “And I don’t like it,” you shake your head, “you’re my friend right Jiminie? Can you buy me some waffles from the cafe pretty please?” You whine.

Jimin turns a little red at the nickname and nods, “Here,” he holds out a couple of bills, more than enough.

The other guys scramble for their wallets, “I’m your friend too right y/n?” They say while holding out their own money to you. Jungkook just stands there slack-jawed, he has never seen his own friends this fucking down-bad before. Oh, but they wanted to laugh at him for simping after you? Funny how the tables have turned.

“Reallyyyy?” You breathily giggle while accepting the money, “Thank you!” You kiss Jimin on the cheek before skipping away with literally breakfast, lunch, and dinner money.

“But I’M the fuckin’ simp? Yeah, totally.” Jungkook scoffs while shaking his head.

Jungkook starts making up an excuse to talk to you from then on. He doesn’t have to do much because you do all the talking for him, he just stands there listening to you ramble on and on about something he doesn’t recall asking. He thinks it’s cute when you stop mid-sentence and say in utter confusion, “What was I talking about again?”

If he could, he’d sit there and just listen to you talk all day. He’s surprised how much he likes your ditziness and dumb little brain fart moments, he finds that he doesn’t mind it so much. Like now, he was sitting there propped up against his car in the parking lot listening to you rant about astrology, time-loops, and anime..?

“Yeah?” Jungkook occasionally says while he watches you passionately explain to him what a fucking shinigami was.

“Think about it—politics and death notebooks, they go hand in hand for disaster and doom.” You softly say, completely side-tracking from the original topic, “I wish I had a shinigami though,” you pout while tapping your finger against your chin, “I think Ryuk is pretty cool. Have you seen the anime?”

Jungkook hums, “No, heard of it but haven’t seen it. So like, shinigami’s come with a death note or what?” He asks, ready for another little rant of yours (he doesn’t mind though). His eyes fall down to your pretty camisole you wore today. You were wearing these cute tight jeans that hung low on your hips, he loved the little pink bows you attached to the belt loops.

“Mm-hm,” you nod, “oh! I gotta go before I forget, all my undies shrunk in the dryer and now they’re pretty tight ‘n they fit a little smaller so now I have to buy some more.” You pout, “Bye Jungkookie,” you throw one arm around his neck as you side-hug him, standing on your tippy toes to reach his height as you press a kiss to his cheek, “bye-bye!” You wave and run off.

“Bye..” Jungkook whispers in awe, he smells a hint of your perfume on his shirt and he vows then and there he isn’t going to wash this shirt anytime soon.

The next time that Jungkook sees you it’s when he’s leaving your shared apartment after another project session. He sees you bent over while poking and trying to pull at the gas tank lid, which is obviously sealed shut. He whistles under his breath and walks over, eyes dropping down to your perky ass which is covered in these pretty little shorts which hug both cheeks nice and tight.

“What you doing down there, hm?” Jungkook leans against the car with his arms folded over his chest and an amused smile on his face, “Having fun?”

“Jungkook, hi,” you greet softly while standing up straight, “I was just trying to get this stupid thingy open because Jennie is letting me borrow her car cause mine is in the shop getting the windows tinted,” you pout, “but I don’t know how to open this stupid thing, and I wanna fill her car with gas as a thank you for letting me borrow it. Help meeeee,” you whine tugging at his arm.

“C’mere,” he loosely wraps an arm around your waist and guides you to sit in the driver's seat, “you see this baby?” He squats down so he’s eye-level with you, his free hand rests over your soft thighs while he points with his other, “You just pull this, and wa-la, the gas tank lid pops right open.” He chuckles and squeezes your thigh.

Your eyes brighten, “Reallyyy? How cool, thank you.” You happily throw your arms around his neck and hug him tightly, “no wonder that stupid thing wasn’t opening.” You giggle.

Jungkook takes a deep whiff of your soft coconut smell, he closes his eyes and sighs in pure bliss. This was the dream dammit, he never wanted to leave this spot EVER. “It was no problem really.” He mumbles more to himself while he stares at your pretty tits.

Fuck the friend code (if you can even call Jennie’s threat that), friend code didn’t have a pair of child-bearing hips and a ass shaped like a fucking peach like you did. Who was Jennie to keep all of you to herself so selfishly?

“Jungkook,” you softly say, “ ‘m gonna give you a thank you kiss.”

Jungkook laughs in amusement over how proud of yourself you look right now, he finds himself shaking his head and speaking in a lower pitched tone, “Yeah, where? Right here?” He turns his face to stick his cheek out.

A tiny little giggle escapes your lips as you nod at him, “Mm-hmm, right there.” You lean upwards to kiss his cheek gently, emitting a soft smacking noise as you happily smooch him. “There.” You say more to yourself.

Jungkook’s eyes drop down to your jiggly boobs which are pretty much in his face at this point. Your camisole somehow dips lower as your tits sit perfectly pushed together to accentuate their size. He tells himself not to but his dick seems to say otherwise as it stirs up in the confinements of his boxers. He already knows he’s about to be sporting a hard-on by the end of this interaction so he gives in.

“Want another kiss..” He mumbles while licking his lips, “But not on my cheek..got somethin’ else you can kiss.”

Your eyes follow his line of sight and you come across the very prominent bulge sitting behind his sweats. Your cheeks feel hot from embarrassment as the familiar throbbing sensation forms between your legs. Jungkook sees this when you suddenly begin rubbing your soft thighs together while staring back at him through half-lidded eyes.

“Whaddya say baby,” he lazily grins, “can I get that kiss?”

You stare back at him with those sweet puppy eyes of yours and nod eagerly.

.

Lips smacking against lips and quiet little moans/noises fill the otherwise dimly lit car (God bless his Mercedes for the interior lighting). You were tucked away on his lap in the backseat of the car, windows foggy and all as your hand slipped from the glass. Jungkook could die a happy man right now with the way he had a handful of ass sitting in the palms of his hands. He gave your soft cheeks appreciative squeezes as he kneaded the flesh roughly—greedily.

His own lips were a bit swollen from the hot make-out session but he didn’t mind, you were one hell of a kisser. One thing he didn’t see coming was how much of a little sex fiend you were, he swears he can’t keep up with how needy and slutty you are. He almost finds it cute how you pout and beg for him to let you have it while simultaneously humping him and refusing to let him part from the kiss.

Jungkook raised his hand and brought it down hard on your ass cheek, relishing in the resounding slap noise and how it recoiled/bounced in place. A slutty little moan escapes your lips as you pull back and pant softly against his lips, “Take ‘em off,” you slur softly, “hate these stupid shorts, gettin’ in my way.” You mumble with a tiny pout.

“Gonna let me see what’s underneath baby?” He looks up through his hooded eyes, grinning when he sees you eagerly nodding back at him, “Yeah? Go on then, slide ‘em off baby, show me what you got on.” He smacks your ass and gropes it harshly, only letting go when you whine at him while unbuttoning your shorts.

He swears under his breath as soon as the button pops open and you slip the zipper down. The hem of your undies comes into view, he sees a tiny bow sitting at the top so innocently and he can’t help but wonder what the rest of your panties are like.. Jungkook reclines back on the seat and parts his legs to make room for you.

You manage to slip your shorts down your thighs slowly with your hips swaying from side to side. Jungkook lets out an audible groan when he sees the cheeky undergarment that was hiding underneath. “Well don’t you look pretty,” he comments while running his hand over your ass, “bet you look prettier under.” He mumbles while licking his lips.

“But what about your kiss?” You pout.

Jungkook smacks your ass wickedly, “Don’t give me that fuckin’ pout. Didn’t know you were that eager to suck my cock, ‘s all you’re good for isn’t it baby? Just a dumb little thing who needs her mouth filled huh?” He grins when he hears you moan, “You gonna be a good little cock sleeve for me?”

“The best,” you happily slur, “ ‘m gonna swallow every last drop, promise.”

He finds it endearing when you hold your pinky out to him, and not wanting to be mean he hooks his pinky with yours, “Good girl.” He brings you in for a gentle little smooch, “Gonna ruin that pretty face of yours baby,” he whispers in-between kisses, “get on your knees for me.”

Jungkook finds that he likes how submissive and responsive you are to him, makes it a hundred times sexier in his opinion. You sink to your knees in front of him without missing a beat, you have your hands set over his knees as you sit there waiting with puppy eyes. “Go ahead baby, ‘s all yours.” He chuckles.

You eagerly paw at his sweats and with his help pull them down alongside his boxers until his fat cock is springing out and slapping against his lower abdomen. Your mouth waters when your eyes land on his perfectly sculpted cock, now you wanna feel it inside of you more than ever. His cock lays against his stomach, flush at the tip with prominent veins on the underside of his shaft.

“ ‘s mine…?” You whisper breathily while pursing yours lips, “ ‘s so pretty..” You’re talking more to yourself as you grab ahold of his throbbing cock and bring the mushroomy tip to your lips. Your tongue pokes out as you swirl it over the head, moaning softly at the tangy taste.

Jungkook bites down on his lip as he watches with hooded eyes, he can’t believe his wet dreams are coming true. Did he save an entire country in his past life? Made sense with how lucky he was right now. He brings his tattooed hand over the back of your head as he simply rests it there, letting you explore his dick like if it was a lollipop or some shit.

Your lips wrap around the head as you make these sloppy little sucking noises. Trickles of saliva begin to trickle down his cock, you use it as lube to stroke his girthy shaft—twisting and turning your hand around it while you noisily swallow around the tip. Jungkook’s lips part with breathy sighs escaping him, he relaxes into the seat and leans his head back with his eyes slipped shut.

You’re working wonders on his cock right now with the way you’re slowly taking more and more of him into your mouth. “Like that,” he whispers more to himself as he moans out again when you dip your tongue into the sensitive slit of his tip. Your strokes become slower but much more intense with the pressure you start applying. It’s getting a lot harder now to control himself from bucking his hips or something.

“Shit, don’t tease me baby,” he groans, “been thinking about your pretty little lips wrapped around my cock for weeks now. Knew you’d look pretty with a mouth full of cock.” Jungkook opens his eyes again to admire the view. “Open up for me baby,” he reaches down to thumb at your lower lip, “there you go—like that.” He grins.

He feeds you more of his cock watching as you eagerly take more and more until the tip hits the back of your throat. It sends you into a small gagging fit but the vibrations and pressure of your throat closing around him definitely sends zaps of hot pleasure down in his groin and lower belly. “Shit.” He groans loudly.

You whine around his cock and pull away to catch your breath, his cock slips from your mouth with a string of saliva connecting your lips to his cock. Jungkook hisses quietly under his breath and reaches down to stroke his slicked up cock, “Messy little thing you are.”

“Off, off, ‘s my turn.” You huff cutely before swallowing his cock in one go now that you’re a bit more prepared.

It takes Jungkook by surprise as he groans loudly and throws his head back. You begin working wonders with that sinful tongue of yours, pairing it with some mean ass sucks. He lets his hand slip from the back of your head to the nape of your neck, just holding you there as he lets you do your thing. You begin bobbing your head slowly while noisily swallowing around his cock.

“Fucking hell y/n,” he whispers slack-jawed, you’re a damn menace. How the hell is he supposed to last? “You just needed something to fill that needy hole of yours didn’t you?” He pants softly, “Knew the moment I saw you that you were made for my cock baby. If only you could see yourself now.” He licks his lips and gives your neck a small gentle squeeze between his fingers.

You slurp up all the slick you leave behind on his cock, your hand sits at the base just idly gripping him while your mouth does all the work. You pull all the way up until the tip sits in your mouth before you swoop back down to take all of him in. He repeatedly hits the back of your throat but you do a much better job at controlling your gag reflex this time around. Your sloppy pace definitely has Jungkook moaning and grunting under his breath.

“Gonna cum,” he sighs, “keep going—like that.” He whispers as a full body shudder falls over him.

You eagerly pull off his cock and begin stroking him at a frantic pace. You watch with glee as his cock begins to throb in your hold, but you don’t let it deter you one bit. You’re eager to see him cum, you want it all in your mouth. “Like this?” You say this while squeezing around the tip and flicking your thumb over it.

Jungkook gasps softly, “Fuck..!” He hisses.

You smile deviously and bring the tip over your lips, “Or like this?” You whisper, blowing softly over his sensitive head before you take him back into your mouth.

Jungkook lets out a mantra of “fucks” and “yes’s” as he reaches down to grip his cock, his hand covers your own as he begins moving your hand up and down on his cock. You suckle at the head and watch as he comes undone. “Oh fuckkk..” He whispers as his cock throbs, cum shooting down your throat as you swallow around him greedily.

He slumps in the seat and pants quietly while watching you clean his dick with your sinful little tongue. He doesn’t think he’s ever cum that hard in his entire life before. He saw the pearly white gates of heaven just now.. “A-Ah shit, no more baby, ‘s sensitive.” He chuckles breathily when you try to suck on his (slowly softening) cock.

You pull back with a cheerful smile on your face, the corner of your mouth has drool and a bit of cum but you don’t seem to mind, “ ‘s so pretty.” You coo like his dick is the most amazing thing ever, he watches you lean over to press a tiny little kiss to the sensitive head.

Are you even real??

“C’mere,” he pats his lap, “I saw the way you were humping your own hand like a bitch in heat the entire time you had my cock in your mouth.” He says as he hauls you up, “You also deserve a nice little thank you, don’t you baby?” He grins while stroking his hands over your soft cheeks.

You nod eagerly, “Mm-hm,” you wrap your arms around his neck and tug him closer, “do you wanna come upstairs after this? I wanna introduce you to my bunny Luna! Oh, and we can watch some anime together because I think it’s lame you haven’t seen Sailor Moon OR Death Note.” You huff in disbelief.

Little did Jungkook know that by saying yes to all that he’d end up staying for wayyyyy longer than he initially planned. You becoming (a important) part of his life was a bonus. <3

TAGLIST: @fragmentof-indifference @jungkooksseuphoria @kooliv @angelarin @jjeonjjk7 @lilliankoo @pb-n-juju @ellesalazar @saweetspoiled @laylasbunbunny @prettyprincejk @cherrysainttt @hyunjinswifeee @joongraduatewithonor @hellbornsworld @leire-mia @m1sss1mp @lissful @winkii @lifeless-firefly @exactlygreatcoffee @taestoess @ayalies @floweryjeons @softtcurse @lilspinachwrld @tearyjjeon @littleobsessedkitty @lovelovelovebts @angeljmnie @rerefundslocals @bangtans-mama @thvhoe @maddkitt @tvse @ohjeon @teteswtnr @jkslovey12 @kelsyx33 @milfpo1ice @sluttydidi @ztyur @beomgyuult @shescharlie @sweet-sourhotcoco @lalita-7 @hazzzelsdimension @p34rluv @kook-net @bonita0-0 @vmapy @dahliadaenerys @gukiebaby @babycandy111

[anasanthology]

Always Close Your Tabs.

WARNINGS: NSFW 18+ MDNI (I don’t care who reads just if your account age is set to under 18 don’t interact please), step-cest, pseudo-incest, stepbrother/stepsister pairing, degradation kink, light face slapping, very light praise kink, Dom/Sub, lowkey Hard Dom!Leon Kennedy, face fucking, oral (m receiving), mean Leon (I feel he’s a little ooc), like one mention of breeding kink, we got a little sweet aftercare at the end, not as tame as other stuff I’ve written, fem-specific gendered terms. Not proofread.

Notes: FIRST LEON FIC I’M POSTING 😚 actually feeling kinda good about this one! I felt like finishing this and posting it today so here so go!!! I hope you like it ☺️ as always, likes and—especially—comments are very VERY much appreciated 😌 if you have any tags you think I should add just tell me cause I’m not sure if I missed any 🧐 ANYWAYS, enjoy, lovelies 💕

4.5k words | Leon Kennedy x AFAB!Reader

The couch was irritating you, you were hyper aware of it, the texture, the firmness, everything about it. It didn’t matter where you sat though, everywhere was irritating. Everything was irritating. Your parents were out of town on some dumb anniversary. No. Your parent and her husband. Leaving you home alone with your stepbrother.

 Leon. 

He was annoying. He was rude, crass, and bitchy. When your mom had told you she was seeing a guy you were happy for her, until she told you that he had a son a few months older than you. Other kids was the one dealbreaker for you, but your mom loved this man so much and you didn’t exactly have much time left to live with her. You could deal with it. So you met Leon, he didn’t talk the entire dinner but to introduce himself and then order something. This was 8 months ago.

Now you live with him.

You were sure that there were worse people to live with, like… Bundy or Dahmer maybe. He always had those loudmouth friends of his over. Chris, who would spend the whole time yelling at the tv and Luis, who would just flirt with you the whole time. The worst of it was that they would only hang out in the living room so you were always confined to your room till they left. That was unless you wanted to hear, ‘ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! THAT DIDN’T EVEN TOUCH ME,’ and, ‘Hola, señorita, ¿Qué pasa? You look gorgeous,’ which… you didn’t wanna hear that. Not to even mention how insufferable he was when they weren’t around. Which was the situation now. Sitting on the couch next to you was Leon Kennedy, staring up at the tv watching Desperate Housewives. He had this constant resting dick face that never seemed to go away, and along with that he also seemed to be followed by resting dick air everywhere he went. Especially now that his dad took away his phone and other electronics before your guys’ parents left for their trip. Because apparently that man cared jack shit for your sanity. Now, Leon was irritated. He was insufferable when he was irritated. It just radiated off of him and you were a porous permeable surface. You guys sat like that until…

“Can I use your laptop?”

“What?” You turned to him, his words bringing you out of your thoughts.

“Can I use your laptop?” He repeated himself.

“Uh… sure, I guess?” Shrugging you got off the couch before stopping in your tracks and pointing at him, “but I get to use your car!” Your eyes widen with excitement and you point at him.

“No, no way. You are not driving my car. Not gonna happen.” He huffed in amusement and shook his head.

“And why not?” Your hands went to your hips and you made a face.

“Because,” he mocks your tone, “you’ll crash it.”

“Says you! Leon, you are like the king of bad driving. You hit a tree last month! A tree! They don’t even move and they’ve been there for like years!” Your hands were flying everywhere at this point. You had your license, but since Leon was a little older and got his a little before you he got a car. And since he got a car—and only Jeff Bezos could comfortably pay for his car insurance—you didn’t get one, you had to share with your mom and stepdad. But since they were halfway across the country, you were stuck here.

“It was in my blind spot!”

“What about that mailbox last week? Or Ms. Anderson’s side mirror? Everything can’t be in your blind spot, Leon. That’s what windows are for.” you close your eyes and sigh, “you know what, I don’t care. Bottom line is, if you don’t let me drive your car, no laptop.” You knew you were reaching, but you didn’t care. It’s not like you lost anything if he said no. It wasn’t fair he got the car anyways, your mom promised you a year ago on your birthday that when you got your license she’d take you to a used car dealership and you could pick one. But apparently ‘situations change’ and ‘things don’t always go as planned’, so you were left having to explain to your friends that it actually wasn’t gonna happen. Leon could practically burn holes through your face with the way he was looking at you, honestly that’s probably what he was thinking about. He sighs and closes his eyes.

“Fine.” He opens his eyes and gives you just about the brattiest look imaginable. You just smile and giggle. Your eyes widened in surprise. You were not expecting him to actually say yes.

“Okay!” You practically sprint upstairs to your room, grabbing your laptop off the bed. You make your way back downstairs and bring it to him. “Here ya go!”

“Thanks.” He takes it with a scowl and gets up.

“Whaddya need it for anyways?”

“Because I wanna watch stuff.” He responds flatly.

“What kinds of stuff?” ‘Porn?’ Was your first thought, but you opted not to verbalize that. 

“Stuff you can’t watch on the tv?”

“Yes.”

“Why not?” You blinked at him.

“Because you’re watching the tv in here, dingus.” He didn’t look guilty. You know, like you would if you were gonna use your stepsister’s laptop to watch porn off of. He just looks annoyed. “Can I go watch some shit now or you gonna keep interrogating me, detective?”

“Jeez, moody. Sure, go.” You shoo him and turn back to the tv as you sit on the couch. He walks away to his room and you lay back covering your face with your arm. It felt like a weight had been lifted, the tension gone immediately. Part of you wanted to say it was just because he made the air so thick with irritation he could suffocate a room, but you knew that wasn’t completely true…

Leon was hot, like crazy hot.

It was frustrating being around that all day and night. Eating dinner across from an actual model… not easy. It was especially not easy when that model was a sarcastic asshole, and it was especially especially not easy when you kinda liked it. Yes every comment pissed you off, made you want to scream sometimes, punch a hole in the wall. but it also had you wondering… ‘would he… I mean in bed did he…’ god you hoped so. ‘Ew, no you didn’t.’ It was dumb—and entirely inappropriate—but that’s all you could think about when he was around. At some point all the irritation and hatred you had for him just living here, turned into… something you shouldn’t think about.

But who cares.

You didn’t have time to think about that. You had much more pressing matters to attend to, like… desperate housewives. You sit up and lay your body on top of your legs like you were folding yourself in half. You looked up at the screen and flipped onto your back kicking your legs over the back of the couch. It was like you just couldn’t get comfortable no matter what. 

“Mmmmmuuhhhhhh.” Sighing you sat back up like normal, pulling the blanket off the back of the couch and onto your tired form. And then it hit you.

The computer.

‘Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.’ Standing up abruptly you started making your way to Leon’s room, practically running up the stairs.

You were tired last night. Really, really tired.

So maybe, just maybe, you forgot to close out of a tab last night. Or maybe a couple. Besides it is your computer, why do you need to close out of anything? You don’t, or at least you don’t when your step brother isn’t using your computer.

“Leon, I need my computer.” You knocked at his door and turned the knob quickly. Locked, of fucking course. “Leon?” Bouncing around a little on the balls of your feet, impatiently you step back from the door and shake the tension out of your hands. ‘Maybe he didn’t see it. Maybe he… didn’t even get on the computer yet. “Leon, I don’t… I don’t need your car. It’s fine, I asked Claire and she said she’d drive me this week.” His door opens like that’s exactly what he was waiting to hear.

“Okay, fine. Take it.” He steps away from the door and you walk inside, looking back at him you take extra attention to his expression. He definitely knows. You just turn back unable to think about that for too much longer, your face burning with heat as you pick up your laptop off of his bed. You feel a pair of hands snake around your waist and you tense up. “But first, I have to know why my slutty little sister thought it was a good idea to give me her laptop with porn open.” It was like your brain took a screenshot. ‘Did he just…’

“I don’t… Leon, I’m sorry. I didn’t-I forgot.”

“Oh you’re such a liar.” You could hear the smirk in his voice. “No, I think you did it on purpose. You’re such a smart girl, I don’t believe you could be so stupid.” Your breath got heavier at his accusation.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? I fell asleep ‘nd forgot it was on there.” He didn’t respond but his hands started running up and down your sides. “Leon, stop teasing me.” Your voice came out just a whiny whisper, sounding a lot more needy rather than urgent like you meant it.

“You know, I wouldn’t have guessed you’d be into that sort of stuff. Always get so nervous when Luis flirts with you, always get so flustered when people touch each other in a movie.” He was ignoring your request completely. “But it makes sense now, you get all shy cause you like it.” Your eyes widen and you squirm in his arms, not exactly trying to get away. Not really trying to get away at all actually. “Wonder how many times I’ve been sitting with you on the couch while your cunt gets all wet. So shameless, darling.” Your body is frozen in embarrassment, it’s kinda hot. ‘God. Don’t think like that Jesus.’

“No, never,” Liar. “Leon, I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“Yet you aren’t trying to stop me, are you?” His voice is so completely self assured and cocky. Asshole. It made you so wet. You aren’t trying to stop him. You don’t want him to stop, even though you should. He pulls his hands back a little for you, so that if you want to get out you can. Without as much internal protest as you’d hoped, you stay completely still. “See, I was right. You are just a little slut who wants to get touched by her stepbrother.” You visibly cringe at that but feel slick spill into your panties at his words.

“Stop.”

“Stop what?” His hands go back around you, pulling you close to him. You could feel the outline of his hardened cock against you.

“Stop… being weird.” You shifted around in his arms.

“How am I being weird?” He snickered.

“Because you’re… stop saying it like that?” Your face was burning at this point. He was pushing up against you, pressing your hips against the edge of his bed.

“Saying it like what? Isn’t that exactly what’s going on? A dumb whore getting wet for her brother?”

“Leon.” His hand dipped down the front of your pants, running his finger down your clothed slit.

“Oh but why? It feels like you like it when I talk to you like that. I mean… given the videos you were watching, I bet you like it.” You pushed up against him. You just want him closer, it doesn’t matter if it’s wrong. He knew what he was doing, making you feel small, degrading you. “You do like it, fuck.” He started grinding himself against your back. You did like it, you wanted him to keep going, keep making you feel small.

“No it… Leon, it’s weird.”

“I know it is, but you like it. You like how depraved it makes you feel. You can’t deny it, I quite literally have seen the stuff you watch to get off.” He was laughing a little, it only amplified how hot and humiliating this was. “Can’t say I haven’t thought about it. Everytime you’d roll your eyes when I’d tease you all I could think about was taking it further, pinning you against the counter or the couch and just telling you anything I could think of.”

“Thought you said you didn’t think I’d be into this?”

“You can be into anything I want you to in my fantasies.” His other hand snakes up to start running his thumb up and down the column of your throat. This really should not have such an effect on you, but it does. Your eyes flutter and you let out a soft needy breath as you lay your head back against him. “Oh you like that? You like that I just imagine you in any position I want?” You nod your head reluctantly. Your lips open and close but no sound comes out. He’s barely even touched you but it feels like your tongue is twisted up in your mouth. You can feel your resolve just slipping away the more he speaks to you, the more he touches you.

“Leon, this is… this is so wrong…” your voice comes out so quiet you aren’t sure he could hear you. Or maybe it’s just because the blood pounding in your ears is so loud that you can barely hear yourself.

“But you like that don’t you? Yeah, I know you do.” His finger travels further up to slide across your bottom lip. Involuntarily—you tell yourself—your lips part slightly. He just laughs softly behind you, the smirk that was undoubtedly plastered on his face was audible. “Does this slutty girl want something in her mouth? There you go…” he slides his finger past your lips and onto your tongue. His thumb starts pushing slow thrusts against your tongue. Your hands go to hold onto his forearm feebly, not trying to move or stop him but just needing something to hold onto. “Yeah? You like it when I finger your pretty little mouth?” You just whine and start sucking around his thumb. “Fuck, bet you’d do so good on my cock.” You turned around to face him.

It was stupid, and you don’t know why you did it… yes you do, liar.

“What?” He grinned down at you. Now being able to see your lips around his thumb he couldn’t get enough of it. You knew you were turned on but holy shit you weren’t expecting him to look like… that. His mouth was slightly parted and his eyes were lidded. A light blush dusts his cheeks. God he looked good. You imagined you probably looked something similar, probably worse. “I asked you a question.” He pulls his thumb from your mouth and slides it down your chin and across your neck. ‘Oh, right.’

“I um… can I?” You swallowed heavily, barely able to focus on your words with his fingers rubbing at your soft skin.

“‘Can you’ what?” He just laughs, he can tell you’re struggling. Your face heats up with embarrassment realizing just how fuck-drunk you already are. And then he just gets the cockiest look on his face. “Oh, you wanna suck my cock? That what this is?” You just nod weakly, you couldn’t deny it if you tried. “Hmm? I can’t hear you, what do you want?”

“I wanna…” you swallow thickly, “I wanna suck your cock, please.” You chewed on the inside of your lip and just looked at him. He felt like he could just about cum from how needy your voice sounded when you said ‘please’.

“Fuck,” his hand slide up your neck and went to the back of your head. “I know you do. Now get on your knees.” His hand tangled in your hair right up against your scalp and he tightened his grip a little, pulling your head back ever so slightly in the process. The way he was talking to you, how he was treating you, all like you were just some object for his pleasure… fuck, it made you wet. If this situation could possibly get any worse from you guys just doing anything at all in the first place, getting turned on from your stepbrother degrading and objectifying you would definitely make it worse. You moaned softly when he pulled your hair as you started to kneel down in front of him slowly, struggling to resist the urge of responding ‘yes, sir.’ When your knees were on the ground and you finally stopped shifting around to get as comfortable as possible you finally realized the position you were in.

You were on your knees in front of your stepbrother about to suck him off…

But at this point, all thought or consideration of morality and shame had long been lost on you. Instead the lewdness of the situation only fueled the fire and part of you was just getting off on how wrong this was. You felt filthy and all it did was make you want to continue. ‘Shit, what the hell is wrong with me?’, would be what you’d typically be thinking. And you were, just less in a self-deprecating way and more in a self-humiliation way. You bite your lip at the site in front of you, Leon’s clothed hard cock in his gray sweatpants. He had noticed how fixated you were and tilted his head at you with a smirk. 

“You want it?” You just stared up at him and moved your hands up to his thighs as you slid them up. “I asked you a question, answer me.” He pulled your hair a little harder this time and you moaned a little louder.

“Yes, wan’ it, Leon, please.” You were completely breathless. It had felt like your mind had turned to mush. You hadn’t even registered his question as a question when he asked, you just wanted to touch him.

“Yeah, I know.” He pushed your head forward till your cheek was pressed up against his cock. “Pretty little cockwhore just wants me inside her.” Your breath quickened when he started grinding up against your face. “Or she just wants to feel me however I please.” His voice was teasing now and he just ground down against you harder.

“However you please, just… Leon, need you.” You barely even sounded like yourself anymore. Normal you would have just pushed him away in the beginning as you made your second-hand embarrassment apparent. Normal you would have known that that was one of the easiest ways to mess with someone and would have totally used it. But here you were instead, a strong-willed smart girl who never pulled any punches now on her knees getting debased completely and absolutely loving it.

“Mmm, you’ll let me use you however I want? What if this is how I wanna do it? What if I just wanna take my cock out and rub it against your face till I cum all over you?” Even in this state you knew he was trying to trap you. He wanted to get you to disagree so he could hear you begging for whatever you really wanted. But you wouldn’t disagree, cause you don’t.

“Even then, just anything you want.” He grinned at your reply. He was tempted, he really was, but after wanting you for so long he wasn’t gonna waste this chance just to prove a point. ‘Next time.’ He pulls your head back just a little so he can see your face. Your lips are slightly parted and you just stare up at him with a grazed over expression.

“Take it out.” He says firmly and raises his eyebrows. You look down at his crotch and bring your hands up to take his dick out of his pants. You feel a sudden sting on your cheek as he slaps you across the face. “No, look at me.” He grabs your jaw and tilts your face up towards his. You make eye contact with him as you start undoing the string on his sweatpants. Part of you wants to look away just so that he’ll slap you again but you don’t. You start pulling his sweatpants and underwear down till his cock swings free. Your eyes dart down to his dick and are only able to just barely register what you’re seeing before he slaps you again just a little harder. “Did you not hear what I said to you? Look. At. Me.” You moan softly and shake your head.

“I heard you, ‘m sorry I was just curious.” You sound a little like you’re about to cry but you’re far from sad about all this.

“You’re curious?” He mocks your voice and pouts his lip before scoffing and leaning down ever so slightly. His thumb caressing your neck. “Don’t worry, once I fuck this little throat you’ll have every answer you could possibly ask for.” You shudder a little before just nodding your head and opening your mouth. You loll your tongue out and he grins. “Yeah, stay like that.” He slaps his heavy tip on your tongue and you can taste the bitterness of his pre-cum. “Open wider.” You obey him and open your mouth further. He leans forward and spits in your mouth. Your eyes flutter and you press your thighs together, which doesn’t go unnoticed. “You like that?” He laughs and rubs one of his fingers over your tongue. “You like it when I spit in your mouth? Fucking disgusting.” He grips his cock and guides it onto your tongue before pushing into your mouth. He groans and holds your head back against the side of his bed before he starts thrusting into your mouth. “Mmm, fuck. Such a good girl with a slutty little mouth. What would your friends say if they knew you’re getting face fucked by your stepbrother, and loving it so much you’re practically dripping onto the floor? What would your mom say?” You really didn’t wanna think about his second question.

“Mmm.” You just hum around his cock in response and he smirked. It’s not like you could actually respond. You kept your eyes on him, loving the way his jaw tightened when he hit the back of your throat. Or the way the muscles in his arms would twitch and flex under his tight shirt. He was right, you did love this and you could feel the discomfort of your sticky panties between your thighs, damp and uncomfortable. His hand went to the top of your head to grip your hair between his fingers and he started pushing in faster.

“Mmh, oh fuck… love sucking on your big brothers cock, yeah? Such a fucking cockwhore it doesn’t matter who it’s from.” He was thrusting at a fervent pace and it was evident he was just chasing his own high. Using your mouth as his personal fleshlight to fuck and fill. It was hot being treated like this, especially by Leon. He tightened his hold on your hair and pushed in a little too far which made you choke. It made slick pour into the gusset of your panties. Fuck, he was right. You’re a total slut. Your hands went up to hold onto his thighs for support as your eyes closed. Spit drooled down your chin and onto your chest, tears poured down your cheeks which Leon took pleasure in wiping away. “Maybe next time you’ll let me fuck that pretty pussy. Bet she’s just crying for me, you are.” ‘Next time?’ The thought made your skin burn with arousal. “Think you’re gonna let me fill up all your holes. Fuck. Yeah, I wanna see that. My obedient little stepsister leaking cum onto my bed, absolutely spent. Such a fucking whore you’d probably ask me to do it again. Fuck your little pussy till it’s sloppy and bred.” 

He wasn’t even looking at you. His head tilted back and his hips stuttered. You could tell he was getting close.

“I’m gonna cum down this slutty throat and you’re gonna swallow it all and thank me.” His face and neck were a little red and he had this sheen of sweat that the light from his lamp bounced off of. He looked like some kind of angel and if he wasn’t aggressively fucking your face you might’ve actually believed he was. “Fuck, oh take it.” He moaned and pushed his cock to the back of your throat. You could feel his hot cum paint stripes into your mouth. He rutted his tip right against the back of your throat while he moaned and mumbled. “Good girl, good girl. Take it, baby.” He pulled back out of your mouth and looked down at you while he stroked himself a few times to make sure he was done. A little bit of cum spilled from his tip and onto your thigh. You could finally swallow now that he was out of your mouth and god it felt good. You opened your mouth to show him that you really did it.

“Thank you.” You smiled up at him softly and he shuddered at your words. He looked away from you and cursed as his face got red. He was just talking earlier; he didn't think you’d actually do it.

“Quit it, you’re gonna make me hard again.” He seemed a little embarrassed. He moved your hair out of your face and went to the bathroom across the hall. You heard water running for a bit and then he came back and kneeled in front of you. He silently used a warm rag to wipe away the dried tears from your face and the little bit of cum that spilled onto your chin. “There you go.” 

“Thank you.” He wiped away the bit that was on your thigh and you guys just stared at each other for a second. It wasn’t really awkward but more like each of you had something to say that you just wouldn’t. 

He leaned forward and kissed you. It was soft and sweet and you had plenty of room to move away if you didn’t want it. There was such a contrast from what you were doing now and what you had been doing, hell, how he was acting with you now and how he had always acted with you; it felt like it was short circuiting your brain, but in a good way. He pulled back and set the rag on his bedside table before picking you up and setting you on his bed. He crawled in next to you and put his arms around you. It felt a little weird but in a nice comforting way. It was something you really needed. You almost forgot that you had been sucking him off—if you could even call it that—like two minutes ago. You really weren’t tired but you laid there with him for who knows how long. 

Maybe you really didn’t hate having a stepbrother.

[rafesweetie]

track iv. THE MAN! (feat. ceo!rafe cameron and indepedent!reader)

“i’m so sick of them coming at me again, ‘cause if i was a man, then i’d be the man”

your boss was simply insufferable. rude, strict, slimy, arrogant, and worst of all? handsome. and you had absolutely no issue telling him that — the bad things, anyway. every time he’d offer help for such a simple task, you’d push him away with a glare or a ‘get out of here, mr. cameron!’ thinking he was simply being condescending. but my god, he thought your attitude was hot.

the day he asked you if you needed help cleaning your coffee mug was when you snapped. you’d already had an awful day, and you couldn’t take him and his demeaning behaviour anymore.

“mr. cameron, it’s a fucking mug! do you think i’m that stupid just because i’m a woman? is that it? i wear skirts to work so i can’t wash my own mug!? you’re a condesending asshole!”

he takes a breath as to not yell back. “woah, hey, hey. uh, i’m gonna need to see you in my office. ten minutes, give you time to fuckin’ chill out. is it that time of the month?”

you go to lose it at him and he cuts you off. “don’t say any more shit unless you wanna lose everything, hm?”

ten minutes later, you hesitantly enter his office, admittedly a bit nervous. “mr. cameron, i just wanna say—“

“no, no. too late now for an apology.”

“but i’m really sorry—“

“show me that.”

you furrow your eyebrows. “what do you mean? how?”

he stands up and grabs your shoulders gently, then his hands slide down your arms and to your wrists. you blink, confused and having your boundaries violated.

“uh— so you don’t get me fuckin fired, let me ask you something, a little formality,” he starts. “do you consent?”

“to what?”

“not an answer. do you consent?”

having a strange burst of butterflies in your stomach, you know what’s coming. “mhm,”

“yeah, that’s what i thought,” a ghost of a smirk as he smiles and guides you by your wrists to the wall. with no hesitation, his hand is going under your skirt. “mhm. fuckin’ soaked, makes sense,”

“you’re so arrogant, it’s insufferable.”

“i’m just stating a fact baby,”

“don’t call me that, m’not your ‘baby’,”

he breaths out a laugh. “yeah, whatever you say. starting to think you’re more arrogant than me,”

“not arrogant, just don’t like you,”

“tell that to this pussy,” he cups it and you squeak, suddenly feeling extremely powerless against your man child of a boss.

“don’t wanna do this like this,” you say fastly, stopping it. “lemme— lemme do it,” he stops, hands in the air in mock surrender, taking a step back.

he certainly isn’t expecting you to drop to your knees in front of him. in his mind, a blowjob is a surrender, letting him take control. you fiddle with his fly. he goes to help and you paw him off. “don’t need help for something so fucking simple, get your slimy hands away,”

you undo it and waste no time taking his dick out of his pants. you hate the way your mouth waters. “oh.” you try to keep your composure. “thought it would be small. you give that energy,”

“gee, thanks,” he huffs. “c’mon, get going.”

“ask nicer,”

“jesus,” he sighs. “i’ll pay you extra to get going, huh? that nice enough?”

“you’re gross. talking about a ‘please.’”

he scoffs. “no fuckin’ way, you kidding me? not begging to get off, i’m not a woma—“ he cuts himself off.

all you do is harshly pinch his tip with your long acrylics, making him gasp in pain, before standing up, scoffing. “good one, really funny. sure your friends will get a kick out of it,” you dust yourself off. “you’re disgusting,”

as you walk away, you can hear him silently begging for you to come back and suck him off.

for once, you feel like the man.

[nameless-jamie]

Moan

Masterlist

Jamie Tartt x fem! PA reader

TW: cursing, suggestive scenes

Jamie Tartt was a pain in Y/N’s ass on a good day. On a bad day, though—like today for example, when he was injured and milking it for all it was worth—he was insufferable.

Y/N stood in his living room, arms crossed, watching as he sprawled out on his couch like a prince in exile, his left ankle propped up on a pile of pillows. His shorts had ridden up slightly, exposing more of his ridiculously toned thigh than necessary, and he was holding the remote like it physically pained him to lift it.

“You could be in the club’s physio room,” she pointed out. “With actual professionals taking care of you.”

Jamie let out a dramatic sigh, rubbing his hand over his face like the mere suggestion exhausted him. “Yeah, but they’re all proper strict and boring. And I don’t like the way they make me do all the exercises in order. I like a bit of flexibility, yeah?”

“What you like is getting me to babysit you.”

His lips curled into a slow, smug grin. “What can I say? You’re my favorite assistant.”

She scoffed. “Idiot, I'm your only assistant.”

“Exactly. That means your job is lookin’ after me.” He reached for the remote again and made a show of wincing. “Ow. That hurt, that.”

“Oh, piss off.”

“No, really. It’s bad, Y/N. So bad.” He pressed his hand to his chest. “I could waste away here, just wither from neglect. You wouldn’t want that on your conscience, would ya?”

“Jamie, you’re not dying. You twisted your ankle.”

“You say that, but it feels serious. Could be career-ending.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake.”

It wasn’t like she had much of a choice in the matter. Ever since Jamie had gone down clutching his ankle in the last match, he had been insistent that she was the only one he could trust to take care of him. Something about her “already knowing his dramatic tendencies” and being “good at keeping him in check.” Which, fine, was technically true, but she was his personal assistant, not his nurse. Although he fucking offered to by her a sexy nurse uniform...

Yet, here she was, spending her evening in his ridiculously big house, watching as he exaggerated his injury like a spoiled child.

“Did you take the painkillers?” she asked, crossing the room to grab the ice pack off the coffee table.

Jamie pouted at her. Actually pouted. “Nah. Didn’t wanna take ‘em without food.”

She let out a long-suffering sigh. “Right. Because you can’t possibly hobble to the kitchen and grab something.”

He grinned. “Now you’re gettin’ it.”

An hour later, after making sure he ate something.

"Protein bars do not count, Jamie."

"That's basically food, love"

She sat cross-legged on the floor beside the couch, replacing his ice pack, while he flicked through Netflix options.

“You’re meant to be resting, not watching telly,” she scolded.

“This is resting.”

“Resting doesn’t require constant entertainment.”

Jamie let out a low chuckle. “Dunno, love. I think I’d get real bored just sittin’ here in silence. Unless you were gonna read to me or some shit. Like in them period dramas Keeley likes.”

She scoffed. “Not happening.”

“Tragic.” He sighed.

5 minutes later the TV was off. But Jamie kept playing with his phone, scrolling aimlessly. “Reckon I should make a dramatic post about my injury?”

“Reckon you should shut up and rest.”

“Oi,” he said, flicking his gaze down to her. “Bit rude.”

“Bit accurate.”

His lips twitched. “Y’know, I think I deserve a little somethin’ for bein’ such a good patient.”

“You are not a good patient.”

“Yeah, I am. I’ve barely complained.”

She raised an eyebrow.

“…Out loud,” he added with a grin. “Anyway, I’m thinkin’ you could help me with my physio. Since I trust you more than them club people.”

She narrowed her eyes. “I feel like you just want an excuse to get a massage out of this.”

His grin turned positively wicked. “You offerin’?”

She groaned. “You’re so annoying.”

“And yet you’re still here, so—”

She grabbed the massage oil from the table with a sigh. “Fine. But if you make one inappropriate comment, I’m leaving you to suffer.”

Jamie held up his hands in mock surrender. “I’d never.”

She should have said no. She should have.

But he looked so pleased with himself, and some masochistic part of her wanted to wipe that smug look off his face. Maybe she could pinch his calves...

It started off fine. Innocent, even. She sat at the edge of the couch, her hands carefully pressing into the muscles of his calf, kneading out the tension from his injury. His ankle was still a little swollen, so she was gentle, working her thumbs into the muscle just above the injury, watching his face for any sign of discomfort. Jamie had his head tilted back, eyes closed, lips parted slightly.

Jamie, for once, was silent. Maybe he was asleep?

The room had gone quiet except for the occasional sound of the TV playing some random Netflix series in the background. If she hadn’t known Jamie so well, she might have thought he was actually in pain instead of reveling in the attention.

She was so focused on working out the tension that she didn’t realize she had shifted closer, one knee now resting on the couch between his legs.

Then—

He suddenly made a sound.

A very specific sound.

A low, deep, utterly sinful moan.

Y/N’s hands froze.

Jamie’s eyes snapped open a second later.

They stared at each other.

“…Did you just—”

“No.”

“Yes, you did.”

Jamie’s face turned red, and for once, for once, he looked genuinely flustered. “It weren’t— I didn’t mean to—”

“Oh my god.” Y/N snatched her hands away like he was on fire, scrambling backward, away from his lap.

“Oi, calm down—” Jamie groaned. This time out of embarrassment, rubbing a hand over his face. “Can you not make a big deal outta this?”

She gaped at him, then let out a slow, wicked smile. “Oh, Jamie.” She shook her head. “I absolutely can...not.”

“Y/N—”

“Jamie Tartt,” she announced, standing up dramatically, “moaning from a massage. A massage by ME!”

“Shut up.”

“Moaning like I—”

“I swear to god, Y/N, if you say it—”

“Like I was giving you something else entirely. Oh, I bet you would LOVE THAT!”

Jamie let out a strangled noise. “Fuckin’ hell, Y/N.”

She grinned. “Oh, I love this for sure.”

“I don’t.”

“I know. That's like the whole point.” She grabbed her coat, still laughing. “I’m never letting you live this down. You can do the rest of your physio yourself. Or do whatever to yourself, I don't care.”

“But—” He let his head drop back against the cushions with a groan. “Fuckin' hate you.”

“No, you don’t, in fact I think you fuckin' love meee.”

He cracked one eye open, watching as she pulled on her jacket, still smiling like she’d just won the lottery. His mouth twitched.

“Yeah,” he shouted after her. “I really fuckin’ do.”

And she definitely had to bite her lip to stop herself from smiling at that.

"Idiot!"

[harrywavycurly]

Sarah!! I’m just imagining one night reader and Eddie’s pillow talk after a long day with Dorothy or even when she was pregnant and I know reader sneaks in wanting cheese fries into the conversation 😂 I love them!!💕💕

Hiii babes!! I love this because you know their pillow talk is just so random especially when she was pregnant😂 so I hope you enjoy these little glimpses into what their late night convos are like!💖

-find all things It Was Just One Night here

“Jesus Christ why are your feet so fucking cold?” “I was too sleepy to put socks on…stop moving Eddie how am I supposed to shove them between yours if you keep wiggling away from me?” “That’s the point you can’t…just let me go get you some socks so we can both get comfortable.” “I’m perfectly content…” “yeah well it feels like I have actual ice cubes on my feet so I’m gonna-” “You’re ruining this moment you asshole just lay down and let me cuddle you.” “But…but your feet…are so fucking cold baby.” “Just lay down and you’ll forget all about my feet in a few minutes.” “How will I forget?…oh is this like…your way of saying we can do sexy stuff that’ll distract me from your glacier feet?” “Yeah…go get me some socks.”

“Did I tell you what Steve told me today when he came to drop off some snacks for me at work?” “Snacks? Baby I packed you a whole fucking lunch.” “So?…what’s lunch have to do with snacks? Oh hand me my chapstick please.” “Here…I guess…snacks and lunch don’t really have anything in common minus being food…but no what did Steve tell you?” “He said he has a date!” “He’s Steve…he always has a date.” “Don’t be an asshole Eddie he’s really excited about this one…wants me to meet her this weekend.” “He wants you to meet her?…Why?” “What do you mean why?” “Is he trying to scare her off?” “Edward James Munson what the fuck is wrong with you?” “Ouch you’re so violent before bed…I’m just saying We all remember what happened with the last girl he brought over…” “She tried to take a bite of my Mac and cheese…I was like eight months pregnant you can’t just try to take my food without me screaming or crying…” “yeah well you ended up doing both…” “I’m his bestfriend Eddie he just wants to get my opinion on her that’s all…” “and probably show off his uncle skills with Dotty…he knows girls melt at the sight of a man holding a baby.” “That’s true…you look dreamy holding Dotty.” “Do I really?” “Yes but do go getting all cocky about it…”

“Is that my shirt?” “No it’s mine.” “Baby…did you go into my dresser and steal another one of my shirts?” “No…I went into the closet and stole one of your shirts…they are perfect for sleeping and you sleep half naked so figured it’s fine.” “Yeah yeah it’s fine…can you uh..is it okay if we cuddle a little before bed? I’ve had a long day.” “We cuddle every night before bed…” “i mean uhm..like can..I uh-” “you wanna be the little spoon don’t you?” “Yes.” “Fine but only if you put your hair up so it’s not all in my face…you know I hate when it gets in my mouth.” “Of course…I love you.” “I love you too now come to momma…tell me all about your day.” “You know how I feel about you calling yourself momma in the bedroom.” “Oh right forgot no momma for me but daddy for you is allowed…that’s so rude.” “Don’t start with the daddy thing unless you’re in the mood to fool around….” “Did you use a new body wash? You smell like…lavender?” “I accidentally used the bed time baby wash we use for Dotty…I thought it was one of your fancy ones…” “it smells nice…god you’re so warm it’s like you’re my own space heater.” “Yeah we need to get your levels checked because it’s like frosty the fucking snowman is spooning me right now.” “At least I didn’t forget my socks this time.” “Thank god for that…”

“When did you know you were in love with me?” “What?” “When did you realize you were in love with me? I mean it took you months to even ask me on a date so I’m just curious.” “Oh uh well…I kinda knew the moment I saw you shove a whole chicken nugget into your mouth and wash it down with a milkshake after we bought Dotty’s crib….I just looked at you and thought…yeah…that’s her…she’s the one.” “What the fuck Eddie that was like a whole month before my baby shower.” “Yeah…I know…but I didn’t wanna freak you out so I figured a date first would be smart.” “For me it was when you came to pick me up from lovers lake at like three in the morning because my car wouldn’t start…that’s when I kinda started seeing you as someone I could actually enjoy being around.” “That’s the first time I stayed the night with you.” “I know…I just enjoyed you being around and when I woke up and you were still there it just…meant a lot to me.” “I’ll always be here…I’m not going anywhere.” “I know…” “I love you…I’d marry you if you’d stop telling me no.” “I love you too…I know you would…but I’m never gonna say yes…sorry.” “It’s fine baby…I’m never gonna stop asking….ya know just incase you change your mind.”

[akuvrus]

[12:31 pm] ☆ choi beomgyu x reader.

— synopsis. when beomgyu tries to cook for [name], but he ends up burning the water and almost burning his house as everything starts to go downhill from there.

ʬʬ﹕genre .. crack crack crack + fluff ; no angst!! disclaimers! : beomgyu not being able to cook nor bake in this ff, him accidentally burning his house, possibly cussing; poor beomgyu he just wanted to cook 4 [name] but ends up getting banned from the kitchen until he actually learns how 2 cook...

beomgyu stared at the pot of boiling water in front of him. he decided he was going to cook today for him and [name], hopefully without failing this time. he had his phone in his hand, watching on youtube while constantly glancing back at the pot, waiting for it to start boiling bubbles before he opened the pack of ramen.

however, he disliked how slowly the water was boiling, so he decided to set the stove all the way up to max heat, before he had placed a glass cover over the pot. almost immediately, the heat was fogging up the glass cover, making it unable for him to see if the water was boiled enough before dropping the ramen inside.

whatever though, he thought. it wasn’t going to be a big deal, he'll still know when it's ready enough, right? he shrugged it off, leaning onto the counter, before he accidentally fell asleep, with the stove set all the way up max heat. now, anyone with normal common sense would never do that, right? but apparently, not for beomgyu.

half an hour later, his fire detectors had gone off, waking him up from his slumber.

the first thing he had woken up to, the moment his eyes opened was the stove. the pot of water was on fire. how was that possible?? can it even be possible? he didn’t know. “shit.” he immediately cursed, before he quickly leaned off the counter and dialed the first person he could think of. which was you, instead of the police and fire department.

he quickly typed in your number, before hitting the call button. for a few seconds, the phone rang and you eventually picked up. “hello?” your voice rang from the other side. “umm, beomgyu.. why is your fire detector going off in the background..?”

“i burnt the water.” he confessed. there was a moment of silence before you spoke up. “what? beomgyu, how the fuck do you burn the water..” your voice rang back in mild confusion. “um,” he paused. “i don’t even know, it just caught on fire, and—”

an explosion sound had interrupted him, “beomgyu—” he cut you off, nervously glancing back on his now set on fire stove. “umm, shit. now my whole stove is on fire.” he nervously muttered, glancing back to the phone in his hand. “[name]... what do i do..”

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN ’’WHAT DO I DO’’ YOU OBVIOUSLY CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT??”

“but i don’t wanna hang up..” he sulked, visibly pouting even though you couldn’t see it. “what if it gets worse right after i hang up?”

“then die.” your sudden comment takes him back. “[name]!! that’s so mean of you!”

“beomgyu, literally shut up and get out of the house unless you have the balls to hang up and deal with it yourself.” he nervously gulped, glancing back at the enlarging fire in front of him, slowly growing larger each second.

“okay.. maybe you’re right and i should get out...” he slowly started to side-walk out of his own kitchen, making his way slowly out of his house, watching the smoke starting to cover up inside his house.

the next second, you had hung up on him. “rude..”

｡ ｡ ｡

by the time you had hung up on beomgyu and called the fire department to his address, you were huffing and puffing. you were almost there, and you could see the large amount of smoke that was coming out of his house’s windows. good thing he at least opened a few windows?

you sped up your pace, running faster towards to beomgyu’s house. luckily, before you had ended the emergency call, a firetruck was luckily nearby and had arrived in time to his address. now you were wondering how this all even started; and you were going to find beomgyu for the answers.

you quickly spotted his figure sitting by a fire truck, wrapped around in a warm blanket, watching his house currently on fire. seeing beomgyu, you slowly made your way to the wolfcut haired male, sitting beside him.

“i messed up big time.” he sighed, tilting his head down once he spotted you next to his sitting figure. “uh-huh, yeah, you did. what did you even do?” you ask.

he nervously fiddled with his fingers, slowly confessing. “i tried to make ramen for us, but i fell asleep with the stove on and the water ended up starting a fire..”

“what.” you were BEYOND flabbergasted?? words couldn’t even explain either. “you fell asleep with the stove on, and was able to somehow BURN the water.” you deadpanned at him with furrowed brows.

“yahh, i’m sorry i can’t cook!” he admitted, sighing deeply. you were not going to let that slide.

“you’re banned from any type of cooking, baking and the kitchen for safety measures.”

“yes ma’am...” he obeyed with a pouty expression on his face. you sighed at his expression, “..okay, i guess it was cute of you to try despite your horrific cooking skills.” he was then instantly smiling again at the compliment he had received.

©akuvrus | don’t repost.

[starscelly]

asking about your experience of games in the northeast! best worst most mid pls! or your favorite bits of each? whatever you want to talk about ✨🙏✨

ahhh thank you for this (totally unprompted by me) question!! ill do like a ranking so if people want um. hot takes or whatever they can just read that but ill do like a breakdown below a cut! the only arena i've not attended a game in thats in the northeast is ppg in pittsburgh. and capital one arena if you count dc!

also clarification as much as i'd like to be unbiased ummm.. unforch not gonna happen. i tried to an Extent but. anyways

Boston*

Philly

Buffalo**

New Jersey**

NYC

Long Island* * - been to multiple games here ** - separated for ranking sake but more or less equal!

OKAY... so like multiple factors to consider for my opinion... i tried not to include the stars performance specifically and if i considered The Game(s) it was more based on how entertaining the home team was or how the crowd was reacting? not on how the stars played. AND ALSO... every worker at every arena was VERY nice and accommodating and thus have had 0 impact on individual arena rankings. ill just do an arena by arena breakdown!

ALSO quick warmups wrap up at the end where i talk abt each teams policy and how much it did or did not piss me off LOLL

BOSTON - i saw the stars there last season and this season (and i also saw their winter classic game but that was in fenway so. i feel it doesnt count lol)! this one gets a big big boost from me just from being. very accessible to me personally. like ive never had to drive there so thats like +10000 because the train is sooo easy. i love u mbta.

BUT i will also say. boston fans get rep for being mean or rude or assholes or Whatever u wanna say but ive never had issue, ive had good silly banter and chats with the oldest of boston men (probs helped by me being from the area but regardless), have gotten on the train in my away team jerseys with no issue, etc.

the crowd just has great energy!!! new england loves their sports yes whatever but everyone was In It from the lower bowl to the deepest of the 300s! i saw a game where the bruins won after 5000 rounds of shootout and a game that the stars won Firmly and never did the energy from the home crowd feel Awful (yes theres people leaving early in big losses but thats like. different i feel like). like people were reacting chatting shouting etc the whole time! i love boston idk. also u get a free poster i think at every game?? at least i have! which is cool!

PHILLY - i will preface with obviously the good vibes are fresh but like. wells fargo is really fucking cool!!!! i liked walking around (even tho i did not get to do as much as i wanted before the game . on account of. i was almost late) there seemed like a lot of shit to do and a lot of cool eatery etc etc. their board is Strange shaped... concave... but she grew on me and i think i like it! and the seats are all rlly nice

also the crowd definitely did not necessarily have like um. the most positive of Vibes. Considering... but they were lively! there was chants there was yelling there was cheering and jeering etc etc. it was fun!! it felt like a hockey game! (it will be clear why i keep mentioning this later)

and as far as transport. traffic was a nightmare mostly bc of it being a big city during rush hour. BUT parking was suuuuper easy! and pretty cheap! i believe i paid abt $20? and u just self parked wherever in that area. (i think unless u had fancy reserved parking but um. i didnt find that worth it. but obvs i didnt do that so i guess who am i). it was a really easy in and out tbh. overall i had a ton of fun with the only Bumps being my own errors from confusion lol!

BUFFALO - buffalo and jersey had very different things that got them to roughly the same ranking. one of the biggest ups for buffalo from me. if we're being so honest. is that parking was SUPER cheap!!! not kidding!!!! it was really easy and really cheap lololol

i dont think there was anything Exceptional abt buffalo (other than the game score. obviously). i will say. and i could be misremembering! but i think they were missing something Vital from the main big board and i wanna say it was the time? like they only had that on the sides. which was strange. but also hearing they may have a new jumbotron so liiike. maybe my opinion there doesnt matter. but overall it was fun! the crowd was like pretty normal. pretty standard hockey crowd energy! but the seats were fine and the price was really good for where i sat!

NEW JERSEY - again, nothing really separating this from buffalo! i will say the arena as a whole is a little nicer maybe. i didnt park at the arena so idk abt pricing there but the garage i parked at maybe a 5 min walk away was well priced!

its a little pricey Overall (at least now bc their team is doing well lol) but i was able to snag good seats ! nothing special but they had a lot of leg room etc. good hockey energy in the arena i'd say, clear enthusiasm and Vibes. dudes behind us were annoying and did not know puck but i wont hold this against all fans

NYC - now.... i know this will be controversial.... but im glad i went once! and now i will probably Never return to msg. i apologize for any msg lovers bc this unforch will be quite a bit of complaining... sorry. TO PREFACE WITH POSITIVITY... the arena design is really nice! like the lights are cool and the little videos are rlly sick and fun etc! but um.

first of all the entering to the seats is ANNOYING. its 50000 escalators up and im unsure Why even... thats not even talking abt the pain to get in. you have to scan your tickets on a turnstile thing as opposed to like a human scanning your ticket and it actually in fact makes the process LONGER and also is way more inaccessible imo bc the turnstiles arent Wide dude.

for reference i was up in the 200s when i normally try to snag lower bowl when possible. so this COULD just be a universal issue im not familiar with but. along with the no leg room there werent any? cup holders??? which is Annoying on its own but EXTRA annoying when you're at a sports game so they have to take the bottle caps off of things so youre stuck??? holding your water (or other bev)??? on account of the lack of cupholder or leg room???

also the arena was DEAD. i understand the rags aren't doing hot this season but ive also visited other teams that werent doing good and at the very least they booed! the only time anyone made Noise was to cheer for THEIR goal. there was none of that crowd wide gasping or groaning or clapping for a save. it was BIZARRE and im wondering how much of it was because the lower bowl was Dudes in Suits or Dude in Suit Adjacent aka the bourgeoisie... BUT I DIGRESS

i will say to compliment sandwich it. its SUPER helpful that its right next to penn station and really great they allow large bag sizes to come in. i loved being able to bring in my tote and not worry abt it. overall the experience was too mid-bad for me to consider spending all that money again

LONG ISLAND - this one is sooo much based off the way their team and fans are so. sorry. i will say the arena is REALLY nice and tickets themselves dont cost a ton! its a beautiful place with really nice and classic hockey fans and energy yk.

now. i dont think i need to elaborate that the isles are not The Most Fun team to watch... i can only take so many 1-1 to ot games you know... they just arent the most exciting rn! but i try not to let that effect Too much!

now my two BIGGEST issues are that parking is WAYYY too expensive. like way too much. i even tried waiting closer to the event to get a cheap resale and that was still more than i paid anywhere else....... it was absurd i fear

but truly. and this does not reflect on fans on hockeyblr of course. but the fans are just RUDE. like i dont know why, ive gone to a stars win and a stars loss and no matter what theyre just bitchy to us???? shouting rude shit right behind us, making weird faces at us sitting next to them, not making Normal Sports Game Convo if you try to initiate, honked at us in the garage, kept saying we had the ugliest jerseys in the league??? like not fun lighthearted sports jeering! just nasty stuff!! i dont know why!!!!!!!!! i met one (1) nice drunk woman who thought they were playing the sharks and that is the only positive experience ive had!

i went to the isles for my first ever stars game and then last year as well and im spoilers not going this year... i just cant do it there anymore lol. during the game the general vibe is fine! but i cant with all the rest of the shit its just kinda not fun

WARMUPS RUNDOWN FOR THOSE WHO CARE - boston, philly, buffalo, and new jersey get their flowers for having Normal warm up policy (you can get there whenever and stand wherever). the isles are really stupid where you can only stand in one (maybe two?) sections for warmups so it gets SUPER backed up around there. rags have a similar policy but its Worse, Actually because the section they make you stand in DOESNT GO DOWN TO THE GLASS?????? HALF OF THE SECTIONS DONT GO DOWN TO THE GLASS????? strange!!! really strange.

OVERALL.... id happily return to boston, philly, nj, and buffalo if given the chance, dont think id go back down to the new york named teams unless it was for a very specific stars (ha) aligned reason.

I HOPE THAT WAS FUN AND INSIGHTFUL TO READ... I HAD A LOT OF THOUGHTS LOL

[rulerzreachf4n7]

Fight me all you want but huntlow/lumity antis are the weakest links in the toh community,

HEAR ME OUT...

...unless you don't have ears idk block the haters

SKIP IF YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED IN SHIPS WARS IT'S HONESTLY EMBARRASSING I HAVE TO SAY THIS!!

All this slander is coming from the goldric/huntmira/lunter/guster/amiter shippers, yes that's a mouthful, and yes I'll be blocking you if you're a toxic shipper, if your not, good! except if you ship amiter, fuck off you lesbianphobic bitch, anyways back to my rant, also sorry if this comes out as insensitive, rude, or if I sound over dramatic I just really hate these types of people

If I had a dime for every toxic shipper I've encountered since I first came into the toh community...BITCH ID BE RICH CAUSE SOME OF Y'ALL ARE WILD ASF 😭🙏, this is based off of a rant I got below this post so yeah credits to anon it was very helpful pookie

Y'all toxic ass shippers will go FUCKING PARAGRAPH LENGTHS TO DEFEND YOUR SHITTY SHIPS, and this is targated twords lunter and goldric, again, if you're not toxic this ain't for you I don't mean to offend anyone, cause tell me why there is this account on Pinterest, I ain't afraid to say their name it's something like TheGoldenCoven, or some shit like that, BROS A LUNTER FAN ACCOUNT 💀, and a toxic one too, dw I got some proof

How the fuck do you normalize the TWO MAIN COUPLE OF A SERIES??? Hunter was never intentioned to date Luz and vice versa, this is a perfect example of toxic a lunter shipper, and not only are they toxic they're...LESBIANPHOBIC!! I know it was probably from 2021 and they've moved on buuuut they did post amiter art, and they're not even a nice person although having in their bio "I'm nice you if you're nice to me" or some bullshit idk

As for toxic goldric shipper accounts I haven't seen any Pinterest or Tumblr accounts so that's good! But majority of the shippers are the most insufferable human beings on earth, their only excuse for shipping them is "they want a mlm couple and they're the same age" noting against wanting a mlm couple it'd be super nice...buy may I remind you this is post early season two...HUNTERS NAME WASN'T EVEN CONFIRMED YET 😭🙏, And let alone having only two or three minutes of screen time makes the ship have an even worse reputation, and the shippers are just bitchy and biphobic, always complaining that Hunter should be canonically gay instead of literally anything else so he can be shipped with only Edric, and I know huntmira shippers exist but I've actually never had an interaction with one, hopefully they aren't too bad

Y'all will come out withe the stupidest excuses not to ship huntlow/lumity, also sorry I got off track 😭😭, for lumity, don't know how it exists, but it's either "it's abusive" or "it's toxic" brother ew 💀, name one way Luz or Amity have hurt each other and DO NOT say it's by how Luz always makes stuff mess even though it's literally apart of her personality or by how she didn't wanna tell her about the portal door in S2 or how she accidentally helped Philip/Belos, I'll wait 😊, and I see the point of how Amity's personality downgraded to only being Luz's gf but she still did have her family problems but I guess they just didn't wanna make it an episode, I mean we got Clouds on the horizon that counts ig?

And for huntlow I keep hearing the same shit "I-Its a crack ship, I-Its forced, t-they have no chemistry 🥺🥺🥺" yeah I can see your toxic ass shipping a 12 and 16 year old together don't think you're slick bitch, and just because huntlow was rushed doesn't mean it's necessarily bad, you don't know if Dana had intentions on it but because of the cancellation it was forced to be rush, and I'm sorry to y'all hearing the shortened s3 excuse but it's true since there's literally no other explanation, also don't come into the comments saying "B-But you don't know that!!🥺🥺" it's just speculation my brother in Christ 😭🙏, merely a theory put together with brain cells which almost everyone in this community doesn't have, another weird double standard is how everyone ships gustholomule and veesha even though there's very little evidence it'll be canon was supposed to be canon but since it's a more noticeable and popular ship no one bats an eye for some reasons even though huntlow is too a popular ship, but these are the more bigger ones so I'll more obscure like cameda or aladarius which where probably never meant to happen and totally fandom operated

Anyways that's all, I'll block haters/toxic shippers in the comments so don't think you'll get a reaction outta me with some half baked and barely thought through argument you found in a Reddit post

[thelunarbar]

How romantic sex on a school bus. Well ig just making out but my point still stands. And Ik it’s a dream but she’s all like ooh ok and I’m just like girl no. Make him take you to a bed at least. 

I love watching the way stiles opinion of Derek changes over time esp given that Derek doesn’t make a great first impression(not that stiles really did either but Derek’s was worse)

“Ate it?”

“Raw?”

“No you stopped to bake in a little werewolf oven.”

Scott’s hair is sooooooooo bad 😭

Also forgot how much I hate this teacher(biology or math maybe? Idk) he’s annoying

This may very well be the only time stiles tells Scott not to cancel a date. 

Danny deserves more love 

Lydia’s thing of acting dumb is really annoying like if he doesn’t want you unless you’re stupid you’re better off without him girl

Stiles reaction to Scott asking Allison about their hanging out with Jackson and Lydia

Jackson is such an asshole but Ik I end up liking him more later on

Of all things to lie about; your bowling skills???

Gotta love stiles needing to know if he’s attractive to gay guys(the answer is yes. Just ask Derek 😜)

Ngl I’ve never been sure how I feel abt deaton bc he’s like kinda helpful sometimes but also super weird more often than not

I fucking adore Melissa McCall 

Dude I tried for literal months(tho without rewatching bc I didn’t wanna do that at the time) to figure out where the pic of Derek standing behind broken glass came from and it’s from ep three when the police officer and then Scott show up the hale house 

I feel like rains too much for this show being set in California 

Derek is so nonchalant about Scott’s freak out I love it

“Why is this starting to feel like you’re Batman and I’m Robin? I don’t wanna be Robin all the time.”

“Nobody’s Batman and Robin any of the time.”

“Not even some of the time?” I love this lil convo and esp this last line bc stiles sounds so sad abt it 

Seriously why is the lighting so damn dark all the time even when I have the brightness on my screen turned all the way up and to my recollection it only gets worse

Scott and his fucking one track mind 

Yikes Allison’s closet is so bad all like boho chic and sequiny

Again a parent walking in without knocking 

I mean at least he acknowledged he forgot to knock but like teenage girl who could’ve been like changing or smth jeez

Love that he’s clearly getting ready to go out and they decide to sneak out before he leaves 

Man I wanna go bowling I haven’t bowled in so long (related even if it doesn’t seem like it, Jackson Lydia Allison and Scott go bowling)

Jackson’s laugh is so obviously fake and it’s so obnoxious 🤮

I can appreciate that being werewolf didn’t make him good at everything(just most things) 

I love love love Derek’s car 

Why does Chris argent wash Derek’s windshield for him??? Oh yes very intimidating good job Chris 

I can’t wait for argent to grow a beard he looks so much better with it 

Breaking the window on Derek’s car was so unnecessary and rude 

Ofc now Scott is great at bowling 

Lydia using Scott to make Jackson jealous is so annoying 

Ah innuendo 

“How do you cheat at bowling?”

“I don’t know, but you did.” But for real Jackson how does someone cheat at bowling 

And Derek’s being a creep again cmon man no wonder people don’t like you when this is the impression you always give 

Call a code? You have to specify which one Melissa. I’m not even a nurse and I know that 

Yay another cringey make out scene 

“Do either of you even play baseball?”

I love that they’re both super honest and just say no when she asks if they care there’s a police enforced curfew

Scott’s angry voice is not great 

Derek’s echoy voice thing wtf is that?

Love that Scott’s first thought is to try to get Derek arrested, again, for smth he didn’t do 

Ooh jump the whole staircase he’s so cool guys you don’t even know 

Ooh he’s losing the jacket things are getting serious 

The noise while he shifted was gross and not necessary 

Also I’m pretty sure they change his shifted makeup look later on bc he doesn’t look how I remember 

Love the choice of Destroya by MCR for this totally pointless fight between Scott and Derek tho 

I mean I say fight but it’s more like Derek beating the snot out of Scott 

and now we have the rational conversation after punching each other 

Oh now you give him answers after you beat the crap out of him

How come we never really discuss the fact that Scott is part of Peter’s pack? At least until he becomes an alpha himself

[jensensfanfic]

FROZEN MEALS

pairing: justin foley x gn!reader

a/n: another from my old wattpad account. this went from being just a 100 words on there... to this. also, warnings are under the cut

warnings: established relationship, use of "babe/baby", food mentions, mouldy food, justin not taking care of himself, mentions of seth + parental neglect, season 1 justin, it's maybe implied that the reader has more money than justin- but i wouldn't say rich/wealthy (not sure- you decide)

—☆—

Justin unlocks his front door and holds it open to let you in ahead of him. The simple, sweet gesture has you smiling, until you quickly remember where you are and who lives here. "Uh, is Seth around today, because I don't wanna be here if—?"

"I know." He shakes his head. "We're good. He been gone a few days, probably won't be back for a while."

"Alright."

"Come on, sit down."

Justin gestures to the tattered, old couch. You put your bag down next to the seat, then sink down into it. Justin kicks the door closed behind him, then opens the freezer and mumbles about how hungry he his. He rummages around for a while, then holds up a box and shakes it.

"This'll do. Hey, there's two of them if you want one."

You turn to read the box he's holding. 'Ready To Eat Roast Dinner.'

"Um, no, thank you. Not hungry."

"Suit yourself." Justin replies, and then you hear him poking holes, rather too harshly, into the plastic film covering his dinner.

He quite literally throws the container into the microwave, taps a few buttons and then grabs a stool while he waits for a beep.

However, like most things in Justin's mom's house, sadly, the microwave is broken. Instead of making that tell-tale beeping sound, it just doesn't stop. It keeps cooking, and after what feels like too long, you have to remind Justin to check his food, before it burns.

"S'okay, looks fine. Thanks for reminding me, though. That thing's a piece of shit."

Justin drops into the space next to you, placing his dinner on the table and digging in. You try not to grimace at the meal he seems to be enjoying, but the smell of it makes your face scrunch, as you cover your mouth with your hand.

"Justin, what is that?"

"Beef... I think." He shrugs. "Who the fuck cares? I'm starving."

"It just... doesn't smell right."

"What d'you mean?" Justin frowns, taking another bite.

"Well, it smells... bad. Like, out of date bad." You stand up and head to the kitchen counter. "Did you check the expiration date?"

"It's fine." Justin repeats.

You glance over the box, flipping it around to find the date, and grimacing when you do. "Justin, this is almost 5 months past!"

Justin looks over at you and just shrugs again. Then he shovels another bite into his mouth, which causes a bubble of anger to rise within you.

"Babe! Stop eating!" You go back to the couch, grab Justin's fork out of his hand and push the meal away. "You can't eat that!"

With a mouth still full, he yells. "I'm fucking hungry! I don't care."

He tries to reach for his food, so you pick it up and throw it into the trash before he can eat anymore.

"What the fuck?" He throws himself against the back of the couch dramatically. "That was fucking rude."

"No. It wasn't. You can eat that mouldy, rotten crap, Justin. You'll get sick." You join him once more, sitting down close enough to him that your legs are pressed together. "Baby, I don't want you to get sick."

"Ugh!" He shakes his head, annoyed, but when he looks at you again, his eyes are soft. "I'm sorry for yelling. I'm just hungry, and there's nothing else to eat."

"Nothing? At all?"

"Believe it or not... Seth's number one priority isn't feeding the dumbass kid he got stuck with after meeting my mom." Justin's eyes are sad, though his voice sounds like how he talks when he's telling a joke. "He rarely fills the fridge, unless it's with booze."

You blink rapidly, fighting off your emotions as you heart shatters. Clearing your throat, you pick up your bag and stand up, offering Justin your hand. He grabs it and you pull him up. "Well, fine then, let's go."

"Where exactly?"

"I'm gonna get us some takeout..." You open front door, throwing a look at the dirty, torn up couch. "...and then we'll eat at my place."

Justin's hand slips from yours, making you pause halfway out of the house. "Wait. Just— fuck sake!"

"What? What's wrong?"

"You already bought me a new backpack... a fucking winter jacket, even my school books. Just– you can't keep, like, buying me things."

"Why can't I?"

"Because! I– we're– it's– I don't know! It's just... it makes me feel like I owe you, all the time. And I have nothing to give you."

Dropping your bag to the floor, you reach for Justin's face, hold it, and force him to look at you. "Justin... baby, I love you, okay? And that means I love taking care of you, and taking care of you is making sure you have everything you need and deserve. 'Cos you do deserve it... even the very basic things that your mom and Seth don't buy for you. Like school books, and clothes... and food that doesn't smell like crap."

"Okay?" You shake his head a little. "And one day when we're older and both successful, you'll owe me back then. For now, though, being with you is enough in return."

Justin's mouth moves just barely, opening and closing as he tries to find what to say.

You know that he's never been the best at accepting help. He's never been one to ask for it either, and he definitely doesn't know how to react when you, or any of your friends tell him he's worth being cared for.

After a few moments, Justin replies with a simple, yet raw and heartfelt – judging by the raspy tone of his voice –, "Love you, too."

You peck his lips and smile. Then, you slide one of your hands up to his forehead.

"What're you doing?"

"Checking for if you feel hot. Do you? You ate quite a few bites of that crap."

Justin shakes his head. "I feel okay."

"Alright. Just tell me if you get a stomach ache or anything, 'kay?"

You take his hand, swing your bag over your shoulder, and then lead him out of the house. "So... pizza?"

"Ooh, yes." Justin grins, and you're more than delighted to see him happy once more. "I absolutely could go for pizza."

Taglist: @mockerycrow @wqxianwriting

13 REASONS WHY MASTERLIST

[for-ships-that-never-sail]

Okay Y'ALL I saw Episode 5 today and these are the thoughts I jotted down while watching it (PART 1 OF 2)

Please don’t read below the cut if you are avoiding spoilers until you get to watch it yourself 

And FYI some of these may not have any context, but I guess it won’t matter cause you’ll have context in 7ish hours anyway (also sorry about how long all my thoughts and feelings are lol)

We’ve all seen the first 4 mins so that’s that - nothing extra special to add there other than that Colin’s soft voice for Pen feels like it makes my heart grow bigger every time I see it

Um what the absolute fuck was that opening title??? Have they deviated and changed that this much before?? Have I never noticed other than with the very small changes they do with adding the correct Bridgerton’s name etc?

Anthony wanting to do that one Monica scream is adorbs

LOLLLLL I love you sweet Greggy

LMAO Cressida with them BARBS

Awh Cressida I do feel for you my girl

OMFGGGGG Colin’s chat with the boys??? THIS IS MUSIC TO MY EARS!!!! SOMEONE STAB ME IN THE HEART AAAAH

And Anthony with that quick wisdom? Is it rude of me to not really have expected it from him even though I know this kind of good sense is in him? I do love you Ant! Sorry that I still think of you as SLOW to good sense because of last season lol

Also that cute and private GOSSIPY moment? LOVEEE

OH PORTIA FOR FUCKS SAKEEEEE WITH “THOSE EXACT WORDS” why are you stressing her out but also why are you STRESSING ME OUT?

BAHAHAHAHAHHSSHHAHAHASHA THAT IMMEDIATE 360 please stopppppp I have whiplash - this show has never presented something I personally see as a legitimate concern (from the character's perspective) and then proceed to resolve that issue soooo fucking fast, like that took two seconds PLEASE I’m dying, I can’t believe I thought I’d be stressed about that comment for a considerable amount of the episode? and then BAM 😂 Excellent job Colin!

For the love of god no one wants to chaperone them???? They’re just gonna go???? No one is gonna stop them? Like is she the John Cena of the Bridgerton universe?? Everyone is just like, oh look, Colin walking down the street speaking to himself, oh look he’s in a carriage, also just speaking to himself - like H'WHAT?

Having that said, yes of course get her alone and fuck her by all means if that’s what you wanna do, don’t let my hang ups about propriety and the rules of the ton stop you my boy

Omg pen my baby was so moved 🥹 She somehow hadn’t processed that whole thing even during the carriage ride? Because unless they teleported, she was just like reeling in silence until this point, just like, looking for the words???

Oh my god OH MY GOD OH MY GOD there you go Portia my mans was as clear as he could be about the exact words both indirectly and directly thank you very much

Omg STAHPPPP I can’t Col you should totally write her love letters saying this type of stuff every day - it’s what she deserves 🥹

Omg they’re so cute???!!!

Consent king!! This is so INTIMATE and CUTE!!! 🥹

Have I never seen tits bigger than like a 32B on Netflix before? Cute lil perky tits never really get registered as out there nudity I guess? Like I knowwww we saw tits the last two seasons, and I guess at the brothels this season too, which I nearly forgot, but like even 0.6 seconds of Pens tits rn feels like I’m on HBO and not Netflix? LOLLL

NO ONE HAS EVER REMOVED A BELT BETTER THAN LUKE NEWTON HAS

FUCK he’s so hot??? I’m probably equally attracted to both actors irl tbh but in the showverse Pen is just my girly and Colin was just my sweet boi too right up until he started undressing rn? Now pen is still my girly but Colin can fucking get ittttt LOLLL

Also we’ve seen him undressed before??? I don’t know what’s going on but he did the 0.0003 second belt thing and I audibly gasped and my brain suddenly went blank and now I’m just drooling over Colin and how hot he is fml

Luke Newton should probably just go around taking his shirts and belts off all the time tbh

Just in real life, stay undressing king, you’re such a treat 😍

Awh he’s got the cutest lil butt, but like…. I can’t look? I’m feeling an odd amount of… second hand embarrassment about his butt? I don’t know if that makes any sense but somehow it feels wrong to be looking at your butt Colin I’m sorry this is just like Pen’s property now you know? I shouldn’t seeeee this lol

Kinda wish they edited out that tiny bit where he moved the sheet? I assume that was for the sake of the actors/show because they can’t actually be like fully naked out here, but that tiny bit could’ve been easily edited a different way - only because I don’t want it to register like he’s covering her up? He’s not, he 100% would NEVER, but like logistically I get it, just wish the editor saw it the way I see it and took that bit out

oop JUMP SCARE Lmfaooooo my mans thought it would end before it even began 😂😂😂

Awh he’s so sweet with her - Touch me anywhere? Please they are really taking on such great parts from the books

Though on a side note I wish that this mirror idea was broken into 2 parts too? like part 1 he just says the lines from the books about wanting to grab her tits and fuck in front of a mirror but they don’t because he wants that gentle missionary first time, and then part 2 after the LW drama he actually passionately fucks her in front of the mirror, horizontally sure, but like from behind while facing the mirror? That's such an easy way to cover her up too - one arm coming from under her, wrapped around her bust to cover her there, and other arm coming over her and snaking down her belly so we know there is finger action but Nic would still be tastefully covered - this allows them to just stare at each other through the mirror the entire time which could have been sooooo hot? And I wouldn't have to suspend disbelief when it comes to her tits not touching any part of him through this whole thing lol - It’s aight though, this is what AO3 is for and I’m by no means disappointed with anything that’s happening rn

Still, circling back, is it like an actor/show rule to just show tits and not do anything else with them? Because I knowwww Colin isn’t gonna just fuck her without sucking on them titties that whole entire time, like please BE REAL for just ONE second, cause there’s absolutely nooooo way his hands and mouth wouldn’t be directly on those tits - but yeah, if it’s an actor/show thing to not do it because it might be too porny/uncomfy, I get it - I’m just looking for that realism because come onnnn there’s literally NO WAY his mouth wouldn’t be all over that LOL

Like even with their vertically challenging situation, I know my mans would fold his neck his back his spine his evvvverryyything to get his face on her tits LOLLLL

Also, sir? Everyone enjoyed your fingers but when are you going to eat my girl out? Please she deserves to see God???!!!!!

Never underestimate the power of grabbing your own dick to get it in either, it's just so fucking hot and I don’t make these rules

I personally think the carriage scene was A LOTTT spicier than this though

Sorry guys, don’t be upset or anything - I just think THAT was PASSION and THIS is LOVE

Slow and settled love - best friend love - honestly it’s how I see couples being intimate once their honeymoon phase is long over - just like, chit chatting while gentle fucking - super comfortable with each other and just not awkward at all - contently smiling and giggling afterwards, like that was all just totally normal everyday behaviour between them

It’s like they’re having a casual bestie moment, just the same as walking around in a market or gossiping in a ballroom

When you really think on it though, it’s so cool that a first time can be this way because you’ve just been best friends your whole life

Anyway, no furniture break I’m afraid