#unless I lie about what I am I guess

[theminecraftbee]

task: answer the following question. do you believe in curses? respond as completely with relevant information as possible.

Grian: Well, that's a lie. This isn't a task. I know it's not a task, I set the things up! Not sure why we're getting a question as pointless as this one, but sure, mysterious scroll, I'll answer. There's no such thing as curses, unless you're Timmy, in which case it's funny, yeah? Besides, I didn't actually kill Etho. Even if that did count, self-fulfilling prophecies aren't the same thing as curses, and I know which one I fall under.

Joel: Do I believe in bloody curses what kind of question is that? Do I really get hearts just for answering this? This feels like a prank or something... well, whatever. There are no such thing as curses, except the Boogeyman curse, which I sort of had today, but it wasn't actually the same at all. A lot of the bloodlust, sure, but a lot more... Etho had to be the one to do it, huh? And it's not the same. Not comforting. That's a stupid thing to say actually. Take it out of wherever you're putting this. Cut it out of the recording. Comforting. Please. As if it were ever... Yeah, I'm done actually. Don't have a good answer. Go away.

Scott: What, other than Jimmy? Bless that man, he may not have died first, but he sure tried his best. Sure, I'll believe Jimmy is cursed. I mean, mostly he's just kind of stupid. Lovingly so. I mean, despite him being stupid, I put up with him, right? That seems like a complete answer to this question. Jimmy's an omen but we put up with him anyway. That's all.

Mumbo: NO RESPONSE GIVEN.

Pearl: Oh, I mean, I'm probably cursed. That's what everyone liked to say at one point. I think... I mean, I think this time I have good friends, which is nice. They don't think I'm cursed. And it's not like I--I mean, it's surprisingly fun, acting cursed! And I am just acting. Acting scary, blowing up dance floors, all of that. And I don't really have to this time, so... Maybe I'm not cursed? And since it's acting, it's not real? This is a weird question.

Etho: Oh, man, that's a question. Um, do I have to answer? Because I feel like if I say no, that's really just asking for it, but if I say yes, I have to explain myself. Uh, I think I'm abstaining, unless the zombie thing from earlier counts. That was scary and I hated it. Curses are scary and I hate them in general, but apparently I'm good at them, if you ask everyone else. Um, it's not the only thing I find scary that apparently I'm good at.

Scar: Why, of course I believe in curses! Look at poor, poor... Timbert? Timmy? Jim? Gosh, sorry, I'm very tired right now. That's more proof of curses, by the way! That I'm tired. I've been tired straight since the desert, let me tell you what. And that, my friends, is a curse like no other. What a terrible beast, loneliness is. Wish me luck breaking it, because it's not happening this season!

Cleo: Oh, you mean the thing people like to blame instead of their own actions? Nah. My soulbond was kind of a curse, I guess, but even that's at least half just... bad people. Bad relationships. Good ones, too. We're all just doing what you can, you know? No script, no curses, no characters, just... Oh, I hope everything turns out tomorrow. Sorry, that's unrelated. It's just nicer to hope than to preemptively blame things on curses that don't exist.

Impulse: Well, I mean, I didn't until you just asked me that, but now I feel like I should. Wouldn't that be nice? Being cursed instead of just sort of unlovable? Sorry, no, that's mean to Gem. I shouldn't say that about Gem, she's been good this season. Super, super cursed, mind you, in the like, game mechanic sense? But she's been good, no backstabbing or inability to get love involved. Um, and I guess that's not fair to Bdubs, kind of, except it also totally is and I haven't forgiven him. So I guess if they ask I said I believed in curses, and that's why my life keeps circling clocks? Don't put any of that other stuff down, I'm trying to work on that.

Lizzie: NO RESPONSE GIVEN.

Gem: I was just cursed for a task, but that probably isn't what you're asking about, right? I'm new, so I don't know! A task is a concrete thing to believe in, like bloodshed or victory or fun and games. You don't have to believe in those to know they're real, either! They just are, whether you like it or not. I understand that much!

Tango: Gah, don't talk to me about... Deep breaths. Look, I don't care if it's a curse, or if it's just me being really bad, or what, I'm not going out pointlessly this time. Jimmy managed not to die first, I can manage to not go out to a stray arrow or my own bomb or a misstep this time, right? Is that so much to ask?

Skizz: Huh? Curses? I mean, I don't think so, and to be totally honest I think it's kind of mean the way people sometimes rag on people about them. Everyone's got so many good things about them! Why do people like to focus on the unfortunate luck, huh?

Bdubs: Hah! Curses! Let me tell you about curses. When I see curses, I eat them for breakfast. I don't got curses, I've got better things to do! I've got my buddies with the Mounders, and I've got-well, I'd say keeping Etho safe, but he's being weird at me again this season. Not that it matters. It never matters. Etho and I, we're... The point is, that doesn't matter anyway, because I have the Mounders, and they're the ones who matter here. And because I'm a strong, independent Bdubs, who doesn't need anyone but my bow and my perfect, flawless fighting prowess! Sorry, what was the question? I've been thinking so much lately that it's just sort of made everything else pop out of my head, so it's hard to keep track. I'm sure I answered it flawlessly, though.

Martyn: Of course there are curses. That's half the fun for you lot, isn't it? Putting your little curses on us and watching us rail against them. Bet you think it's real cute to ask us what we think of the things, too. "Oh, what do you think of curses," like we have any control over them. Please. If I had any control over curses, Jimmy--or, well, no, I guess that one was technically broken, wasn't it? Sure doesn't feel like it. Point is, curses are bad, and they're definitely real, and I hate you for them, got it?

BigB: Look, man, if you're trying to get me to write my character out for you, just say so! I won't tell anyone. We can come up with a hole thing about holes and red tasks and the Backrooms together! It'll be fun! After all, you probably don't know what kind of curse to say I have, right? Haha, just kidding. I have no idea what I'm talking about. Luckily, neither does anyone else, so I think that evens out between the lot of us.

Jimmy: NO RESPONSE GIVEN.

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM SHREK 2 *  assorted dialogue from the 2004 film, adjust as necessary

quick! tell a lie!

i can't believe you're just gonna walk away from the best thing that ever happened to you.

say something crazy, like "i'm wearing ladies underwear!"

i most certainly am not!

it's a thong!

i don't feel any different. do i look any different?

you still look like an ass to me.

nobody said i have the right to remain silent!

you have the right to remain silent. what you lack is the capacity.

stop. i have misjudged you.

join the club. we got jackets.

look, she's not seeing any clients today.

we're from the union.

we represent the workers in all magical industries, both evil and benign.

are you feeling at all degraded or oppressed?

okay, we're going to have a look around.

think of the saddest thing that's ever happened to you.

oh man. where do i begin?

they all got drunk and started hitting me with sticks, yelling "piñata! piñata!"

i need you to cry!

all i got in my room was shampoo.

i hate mondays.

who on earth are they?

that's not little. that's a really big problem.

we came, we saw them, now let's go before they light the torches.

they're my parents!

good! now's our chance! let's go back inside and pretend we're not home.

quick, while they're not looking, we can make a run for it.

you can do this.

i don't want to die!

oh sweet sister mother of mercy! i'm melting! i'm melting!

i'm sorry, the position of annoying talking animal has already been taken.

oh look! a little cat!

look out! he's got a piece!

are we there yet?

oh god help me! please!

tell the truth. will i ever be able to play the violin again?

i drank the potion and well, now... i'm sexy.

oh pick me! i'll be your true love!

someday i will repay you, unless of course i can't find you, or if i forget.

fear me, if you dare.

i had hoped you would never see me like this.

i'm sorry to both of you.

i just wish i could be the man that you deserve.

go! your lady needs you!

today, i repay my debt.

who dares enter my room?

i hope i'm not interrupting anything.

you are told correct, but for this i charge a great deal of money.

for five minutes, could you not be yourself?

it wasn't my fault! he didn't get there in time!

are you kidding? he's gorgeous! his face looks like it was carved by angels?

i see london! i see france!

why don't we drop in for a spell?

oh mexican food! my favorite!

you have forced me to do something i really don't want to do.

my diet is ruined! i hope you're happy.

they just want to give us their blessing.

who said i want to be part of this family?

look out! here comes the new me!

first things first. we need to get you out of those clothes.

did i miss?

pardon me. would you mind letting me go?

quit messing around!

almost everybody who meets you wants to kill you.

whatever happens... i must not cry.

can i help you, your majesty?

tell us about where you live.

i guess that will be a fine place to raise the children.

oh, stop being such a drama king.

i don't care whose fault this was, just get this place cleaned up.

i'm not going.

he's completely lost his mind!

we can't be lost.

i wasn't the one who refused to stop for directions.

you're so tense.

do you think you could get up there?

i've made changes for you. think about that.

i guess i gave her the wrong tea.

sorry. i thought that question was directed at me.

uh... FYI. not my fault.

we just need to work out something smarter, that's all.

i need to have someone "taken care of."

[smooth-perceval]

“Stop acting like the grinch.”

Max Verstappen x Fem!Reader

Summary: Max pushes reader away, but reader is too stubborn to leave him alone- and soon find outs the truth.

Warning: swearing, max being a bit of a dick, forgiven very easy, reader being stubborn, fluff, angst?

Key: Y/N (Your name) Y/L/N (your last name)

Word count: 715

A/N: this is short and rushed please don’t hate me! It’s busy season and I forgot how busy I get at Christmas!!

Me and max hadn’t spoken in a few weeks or so- something about needing space over the holidays to focus on training…

Every year without fail for the past 4 years we spent Christmas together, it was our sworn vow in our friendship- Christmas never gets missed. Maybe except this year… Well unless he tells me to leave him alone then I’ll have to just walk away- right?

“Max! I know you said you need space… but I got all my decorations!” Kicking the door with my foot, I juggled the boxes in my arms.

“Max? You in- I should’ve texted before coming over I’m sorry.”

Nudging the door once again, I then sighed dropping the boxes to the floor hearing what sounds like a possible few broken ornaments.

“Max?” Hands on my hips I stared at the door. “Such an idiot Y/N… he’s out.” Mumbling unholy words to myself I prepared myself to carry the boxes back down to the car.

“Y/N?” With squinting eyes, messy hair and slightly red face- peering through the slightly opened door was Max.

“Max?” Mouth slacked I stared at him like a deer in headlights.

“Hi-” it felt lovely to see him again… I missed him deeply.

“Hey… what are you doing here?” Furrowing his eyebrows- he opened the door a little more.

“To decorate?… like last year- and the year before…”

“Y/N- I said I am focusing on other shit…”

“But max- we do this every year.”

“Not this year… you need to go.”

“Max-”

“Don’t Max me. Just go…”

Deflated, my shoulders slumped. I thought it’ll be easy to just turn and go- but truthfully I wasn’t giving up the fight that easy.

“Stop acting like the grinch.”

A little smile crept on his face before he quickly wiped it away.

“You’re still here.”

“No shit Sherlock. Let me in.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Yes.”

“No.”

“Fine. I’ll wait out here… decorate your front door or something…”

“Fine.”

“Fine.”

Silence… he didn’t shut the door we just stared at each other.

“And if this is the most I’ll see of you- then merry Christmas and happy new year.” With my hand now against his forehead I pushed it back slamming the door shut on my own face. And true to my word, I started decorating his front door- making do with what I had, a little tinsel around the door- a doormat In front.

I went to tie some balbals around the handle- when the door sprung open again.

“Y/N.”

Leaning forward I wrapped the balbals around before rummaging through the bag again.

“Y/N.”

“What Max.”

“I’m sorry…”

“I know.”

“I just-”

“You just?”

“I’m not busy- I lied.”

“You lied?… why did you lie?” A little insulted I took a step away from him- like he twisted a knife in my heart. “I realised I am in love with you- and that has scared the shit of me.”

“You’re in love with me…?” And the knife was untwisted, heart was kissed better and floating back in his arms.

“So much it hurts.”

“Max…” shushing me he looked up pulling the tinsel down from the door

“So if you’ll have me- I’d like to celebrate this Christmas a little differently from the last.”

“How so?” With a sly smile on his face, he threw the tinsel around me pulling me in. “I’ll show you-”

And there it was the first time ever in 4 years- we kissed. And it was magical. I couldn’t describe the kiss just- I knew I wanted this forever. The tinsel around my waist, max grip on the tinsel wrapping it around his hands the closer he pulls me in.

“Max-” mumbling I pulled away- his eyes still closed as he pulled back slightly humming as a response. “Can we watch the grinch?”

“Seriously…”

“You was a dick.”

“Because I love you!”

“And now you’ll watch the grinch while we decorate!”

“I guess I will.” Rolling his eyes he grabbed the bag of decor, as I picked up the rest.

“Oh and max-” turning around he looked down slightly at me.

“Merry Christmas.” Whispering to him- I leaned up kissing his lips delicately- leaving him with a cute smile on his face.

“And a happy new year.” He whispered back returning the kiss.

[persephone-is-here-omg]

Being Venezuelan on social media is a frustrating experience, to describe it one way.

A lot of espaces in social media are meant for English speakers, which means you have to speak English to interact with others. That's fine, I am of the believe knowing more than one language is good for you. Unless you're Venezuelan, talking about Venezuela... In that case you're a CIA plant or can only be White & Rich™️.

As a Venezuelan on the internet you're supposed to care about every single problem in the world, and you have to post about, and then you have to prove that you care, and you have to be gracious and meet people in the middle to help them understand our situation even if they are condescending and, really, have no interest listening from venezuelans in Venezuela or out.

Y'all will play the label Olympics, but when it comes to Venezuela y'all won't care about the most important label to talk about it being Venezuelan. Y'all willfully and unironically will believe the wakiest shit about this country, like that time you made it your mission to spread the lie that LGBTQ venezuelans have ALL THE RIGHTS when venezuelans in Venezuela have been telling you for years that is not true.

Venezuelans on social media have to prove to you that we deserve basic shit, like running water, electricity, and the freedom to criticize the government. And then when venezuelans do not take kindly to being talked down to and accused of not knowing what is happening in their own country, or what they're living... Y'all want to play victim. As if you haven't been treating the lives and experiences of Venezuelans as a way to prove how much of a leftie you are and how "anti-imperialist" you are. As if Russia, China and Iran aren't interfering in Venezuela. But I guess that's fine, 'cause as I was told by someone on this very site... Is okay as long as it isn't the USA.

[imagines--galore]

||A Nonverbal Confession||

Summary: Your boyfriend assumes you are fast asleep as he slides into bed next to you. He ends up confessing what he thinks is a secret. Little does he know, you’re awake, and more then aware of what he just said. Or didn’t say.

Pairing: TASM! Peter Parker x Reader

Rating || Genres || Warnings: K+ Romance. None I guess.

A/N: Well you guys voted and this is what I wrote! Hope you enjoy it!

You had promised to wait up for him. It was something you always did before he went out on patrol. It was more for your peace of mind. You honestly couldn’t sleep unless you knew he was back, sleeping beside you, safe and sound. That night though, he had run a little late, and you had greeted him bleary eyed and a sleepy smile on your lips. Peter had told you to go to sleep on numerous occasions, to which you had refused.

You knew of his identity as Spiderman before you had started to date. It was a complete accident. You had been preparing to go to sleep in the apartment right next to Peter’s when he had accidentally stumbled into your place and yanked his mask off. And since he was a little banged up from a recent run-in with law-breakers, you had decided to help him as much as you could to clean up. And even helped him get clothes from his apartment so he wouldn’t have to wander the halls in his ripped up spider-suit.

That was a long time ago, and you were now living with him. The ritual of your staying awake till he came back started very early on, and you had carried it into your dating life as well.

“Running a little late there Parker, I was starting to get worried.” You stated with a huge yawn, slowly walking past him. As you went, you reached up to playfully pet his cheek. Peter gave you a pout, having been hoping for a kiss. “Well keeping New York safe is never an easy job.” He stated, following after you, dropping the mask, which he had removed as soon as he stepped into the apartment. “I suppose so.” You mused, dropping onto your shared bed and snuggling into the softness of the mattress and many many pillows you kept on your side. Peter made to lie down next to you, but you held him back by holding out your leg and playfully pressing your foot against his stomach.

“No way am I letting you get into this bed with the entire city on you Spider-boy.” You stated firmly. “I changed the sheets yesterday.” Peter grumbled under his breath, playfully grabbing your ankle and giving it a tug. You shrieked as you nearly slipped from the bed, throwing your boyfriend a glare as he quickly disappeared into the adjoining bathroom. He only just managed to close the door to avoid getting a magazine thrown in his face by his sleep-deprived girlfriend.

“Bully!” He heard you through the door. Chuckling softly to himself, Peter quickly stepped out of his suit and into the shower. He made quick work of washing himself, wanting to get into bed. It hadn’t been a tough patrol, but he was tired, and he had to get to work in the morning. But mostly, he wanted to catch a few snuggles with you before you fell asleep. And once you were asleep, even the devil couldn’t wake you. Well he could, but he would wish he hadn’t. You were very particular when it came to your beauty sleep.

Pulling on a pair of pajama bottoms, after quickly drying his body, Peter stepped out of the bathroom. Only to freeze at the threshold because of the sight that greeted him.

You were asleep, that much was clear to see from the steady rise and fall of your chest. What he hadn’t expected was for you to be snuggled against his pillow, nose almost buried in the fabric. As if you had fallen asleep while.....a sweet blush stole across his cheeks. Well he shouldn’t complain. He was always burying his nose in your neck and inhaling your scent. What was to stop you from doing the same.

Despite his protest of you always staying awake when he went on patrol, Peter couldn’t help but adore you for it. It just warmed his heart, to know that you cared about him so much, that you worried about him and his safety. Sighing to himself, Peter climbed into bed just behind you. It wasn’t his normal sleeping place, but once the scent of your shampoo slowly registered in his mind, he wasn’t about to complain.

Your shirt, or rather his shirt, had ridden up while you had been adjusting to find a comfortable position. His warm gaze drifted from the back of your head to the exposed skin. Slowly, he reached out, splaying his hand across the soft skin of your back. His hand was warm, so you barely even felt anything as you continued to slumber. First his fingers began to stroke along your skin, but when you gave a little shiver and seemed to curl into yourself, he opted to trace non-nonsensical patterns against your skin.

Slowly the patterns began to take shape in the form of words. He traced your name, over and over, before moving to tracing whatever pet-name he had called you since you had begun dating. Since you remained asleep, and he ran out of nicknames, he started to spell words he associated with you. Any positive adjective that rose within his mind, he traced every single one.

And once he finally ran out of those, and his brain began to drift off into slumber-land, Peter Parker poured his very heart and soul into tracing those three words into your skin, hoping those words would be somehow branded into your heart and mind. That you would know just how much he adored you.

What he didn’t know, was that you had only dozed off, and when you felt his hand against your back, you had stilled, wanting to see what he would do. It had taken a little while, but you had managed to comprehend what he was tracing against your skin. A sleepy smile pulled at your lips as he continued his little game, your heart swelling with more and more adoration for your boyfriend. It was when he traced those three words into your skin that your eyes snapped open and you went completely still. He didn’t notice, having pulled back to get to sleep himself. But you wouldn’t let him sleep without saying what you knew he deserved to hear. 

Seemingly satisfied, Peter gave a small sigh, reluctantly pulling his hand away from your skin, and pulling the blankets up to cover you. He shifted into a more comfortable position, but his movements seemed to have stirred you awake. You shifted, slowly turning over. Despite your eyes being closed, your body seemed to gravitate towards him. Peter gladly helped you adjust against his chest, wrapping an arm around your middle as you finally settled against him.

“I love you too, Peter.”

He had been about to fall asleep, his eyes had closed almost completely when he felt you speak those words to him, your breath warm against his bare chest. Peter made a move as if he were about to speak, but a quick press of warm lips against his skin had him stilling. “Go to sleep Spider-boy, we’ll talk in the morning.” If it were possible, you snuggled deeper against him, slowly drifting back asleep.

Peter gave a soft laugh, his lips dropping a sweet kiss to the top of your head before his eyes closed, and he fell asleep as well.

[andy-wm]

What we know now, after they have started MS

This is a short post, because life is a lot right now and i have very little emotional energy. But this felt important, so here I am.

Tonight I revisited an older post and realised I'd never completed the thought process i began there...

When Jimin released his solo album, FACE, I wrote this analysis post.

Part of that analysis talked about my impression of JK's backing vocals on Letter.

We had seen Jimin's Production Diary, and based on the clip of JK in the recording studio I thought he didn't know he would be asked to sing backing vocals.

Here's a screen grab of that post:

After watching the docuseries, BTS Monuments: Beyond The Star, we know that was correct...

It was a surprise to him when Jimin asked him.

In fact both aspects of that prediction were right, he didn't know about the song at all.

I have two questions:

Why would Jimin have kept the song a secret from JK?

And

Why wouldn't Jimin himself ask Jungkook to sing it? Why get PDogg to ask him? Jimin was RIGHT THERE.

Actually, make that three questions.

Why did Jimin scurry away as soon as JK asked to listen to the song?

Jimin earnestly said, "I made a fan song", while holding Jungkook's face in his hands.

That's such an intimate gesture, by the way. If my Best Friend held my face that way while they told me they'd done something, I'd take it to mean that the something was significant for/about me.

Jungkook asked to listen to the song, and Jimin... vanished. He retreated to the sofa to sit out of Jungkook's line of sight.

He's suddenly shy? Shy of Jungkook's reaction?? Wierd, but ok...

Unless the song is REALLY significant to JK....

In short, yes, it is REALLY significant. We already kinda guessed that right? But now, in light of their situation, it's more significant...

So, Jungkook recorded his part of the song.

Lets think about the lyrics...

Bear in mind this was written and recorded long before they had confirmation that their application for companion enlistment was successful...

These lyrics are even more significant in that context.

Plus

This is the part of the song that's in banmal. The switch from polite to familiar signals a change in the relationship, (I wrote about that in a previous post) and since Jimin always talks to ARMY politely, we can asume this part of the the song (at least) is directed at... someone else 👀

"We dont know what the future holds, don't worry I'll stay by your side."

Now consider that Jimin has written these words for not only himself to sing. He's asking Jungkook to sing them with him.

He's asking Jungkook to sing this love song with him.

With no hesitation, Jungkook says yes. He does the recording there and then.

And when JK is finished recording...

He tells Jimin that the song is really nice. Immediately, Jimin is a limpet. He's all over Junkgook like he's made of Velcro. A stark contrast to his earier behaviour when his vulnerability made him scurry away.

Jimin jokes that Junkgook should record a message for ARMY and Pdogg calls him out on that lie. Of course JK refuses. "It's your song." he tells Jimin.

Jimin is pushing his luck here, first asking JK to record a message, and then asking him to claim ownership (or share responsibility) for the song.

Jk has no trouble saying no to that.

It seems like more than a meaningless joke to me. One of those suggestions alone might be, but both? It left me wondering if Jimin suddenly felt scared that he was revealing too much with the song?

I'm kinda impressed that JK, for all his love and support, wasn't prepared to rescue Jimin from his choices. He simply, but gently, said no. It tells me a lot about their relationship.

It also tells me a lot about both JK's honestly and his belief in Jimin.

eta, I was tired and once my thought bubble popped i just hit 'post' and fell asleep. But it's exactly a year since Jimin released FACE and i think it's a pretty cool coincidence that i came back to this randomly on this day.

Happy FACE day, ARMYs. 💛💜

[dr-spectre]

Ranting about Salmon Run...

As someone who loves this mode and thinks it's the best multiplayer mode in Splatoon 3. The scale system in it is dogshit and needs to change in the next game. It's genuinely awful and terrible game design in my opinion.

In order to get scales you must encounter a King Salmonid, the amount of scales you get is determined by your current rank and if you win or lose. Now to even get to a King Salmonid, you must do several matches to increase the chance of encountering one. Guess how long each Salmon Run match is... 300 seconds/5 minutes. Actually it's a little bit longer than that because you have to take into account queuing times, the wait time at the start of the match and the 10 seconds you get to prepare in each round.

Let's say you need to do 5 matches to even encounter the King Salmonid, you have to go through a little over 25 to 30 MINUTES to get a CHANCE to fight the king. AND GUESS WHAT! EVEN IF THE ICON IS FULL! THERE'S STILL A CHANCE YOU WON'T EVEN GET TO FIGHT A KING!!! WHY!??!? WHY IS IT LIKE THAT!??! I WENT THROUGH 5 MATCHES WHEN THE BAR WAS FULL AND YET I DIDN'T ENCOUNTER A KING AT ALL!!!! IT WAS A GIANT WASTE OF TIME!!!!!! (aside from ability chunks i guess) I GOT OTHER GAMES TO PLAY!!!!!

This icon is a fucking lie, a god damn lie i tell you! Even if it's full, your other teammates have to have theirs full as well apparently. So.. YAY! AWESOME! ughhhh........

Now let's talk about when you actually get the scales, there's a very high chance you will get barely any scales because you lost and you're in a low rank, OR, you won't get a single gold scale for several Xtrawaves. Meaning you have to go through the process of building up the meter again and again AND AGAIN to get a chance to get a single fucking gold scale. Do you see the issue here? The insanely long grind? It's fucking horrible.

Oh yeah and by the way, the chance of you getting a gold scale gets higher when you're in a higher rank, however this becomes an issue when you realise that the higher ranks are REALLY REALLY hard and it's near impossible to make it to the Xtrawave unless you have an amazing team. So yeah, good luck trying to maintain a high rank and actually beat the King Salmonid to get a chance of getting a gold scale!!!!!!!

Man... This is giving me a god damn headache.

Now, let's talk about the rewards you get. I'm gonna come right out and say it, you are never EVER getting any of these rewards.

Unless you actually hack the game or you abandon every aspect of your life just to get a bunch of fucking pngs for your splashtag, you will never EVER EVER EVER GET THEM! They are flat out impossible and if you see someone have any of these, they are a hacker and need to get reported.

And the gear that people actually want, well... LOOK AT THIS!

WHY ARE THERE SO MANY 800 BRONZE SCALE ITEMS!??! WHY?!?!?! WHYYYY?!!?!? Sometimes in Xtrawaves you may not even get 10 OF THESE! SO WHY MAKE IT TO WHERE MOST OF THE GEAR PEOPLE ACTUALLY WANT 800 GOD DAMN SCALES??!? If you got like 30 or 50 each time then maybe it would make sense, BUT NO! IT'S LIKE 5 TO 12!! WHYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have been playing this game since launch and i only have the Octoleet Armor. THAT IS IT! There is a difference between rewarding the player and just doing monotonous grinding.

I am glad that Splatoon doesn't do what other games do nowadays and just has microtransactions to skip through grinding and pay an insane fee for currency. But like... Overwatch 2 is less grindy than this, you can comfortably get skins in that game for characters you like just by doing challenges and playing a bit of the game every day, and that game has SKINS THAT COST 58 BUCKS AUD!

That's all i wanted to say, I'm getting a headache just typing this because my god man, this is just awful game design and a poor way of rewarding the player and keeping retention time. Truly awful.

[princessmaybank]

New Message

Pairings: JJ x fem!bestfriend!xreader

Warnings: MDNI, unsolicited dick pic, sexting, mention of masterbation, making out, etc.

Summary: JJ woke Y/N up at early hours of the morning because he needed her help.

Authors Note: Enjoy! Let me know if I should write a part 2!

I woke up to the sound of my phone going off. I looked at the clock that sat next to my bed. It read 1:36am.

*1 New Message from Jayj <3*

JJ: Hey are you awake?

I groaned. What could my best friend possibly need at this time? Was he in trouble? Was he hurt? I had no idea.

Y/N: I am now. What's up are you okay??

I wasn't expecting an immediate response but that's what I got.

JJ: No I need your help

Y/N: What's wrong?? Do I need to come get you?

JJ: No but if you came over I wouldn't mind 😉

That is not the kind of response that you use when your friend thinks you are dying, well unless you are JJ Maybank.

Y/N: Okay then what do you need?? Why did you wake me up???

JJ: I'm hornyyyyy

A sudden redness shot to my cheeks. JJ definitely play flirted with his friends, including me but this takes the cake. Yes he was hot, yes I had a little crush on him, no I did not expect this.

Y/N: Uhm- why are you telling me this JJ?

JJ: Bc you're my best friend, and I've noticed the way you've been looking at me. You undress me with your eyes every time you see me

Somehow I was blushing even harder than before. How did he know? Before I could respond I heard my phone ding again.

JJ: I know you wanna see what I'm packing, you're at least a lil curious.

(Authors Note: MDNI!!! This is a RANDOM dick pic I found online. Please proceed at your own risk.)

I gasped. I wasn't entirely ready to see that, but I'm not gonna lie I did like it.

Y/N: JJ. You're my best friend, and don't you have a line of girls ready for you at all times?

JJ: I mean I guess, but none of them are you.

JJ WANTED ME?!?! OF ALL PEOPLE, MY BEST FRIEND WHO I HAVE HAD A CRUSH ON FOR A YEAR, WANTS ME?!?!

Y/N: What do you need from me JJ?

JJ: I need you to talk dirty to me please. I'll do anything.

I gave in so quickly. This could be the one chance I have with him.

Y/N: Are you touching yourself baby?

This was my first time talking like this so I had no idea what I was doing.

JJ: Just for you princess.

The thought of JJ touching himself to me and calling me princess got me extremely excited.

I couldn't stop my hand from creeping into my pants as I texted JJ back with my non-dominant hand.

Y/N: Mmm Jayj I can't stop thinking about your huge cock.

JJ: Oh fuck, please tell me you are touching yourself too.

I wasn't sure if I should lie or not.

Y/N: Of course I am after seeing you.

JJ: Good girl.

Fuck. Me. That is so hot, especially coming from him of all people.

Y/N: JJ I need you. I can't just do this by myself. I'm no good at dirty talk.

JJ: *Read 2:04 AM*

Oh no. He hates me now. He knew I wasn't experienced but he was always nice about that. This will be awkward to bring up at a later time.

About 10 minutes went by and I heard a *tink* on my window. I look over and see JJ sitting on my roof waving back at me. I eagerly opened my window and welcomed him in. Before I could get any words to leave my mouth his hands found my hips and his lips had found mine. He walked me backwards until my legs hit the edge of my bed. He laid me down and continued our deep kiss.

"Fuck you're so hot." He whispered in my ear after sucking on my soft spot. There would definitely be a mark on my neck for a little while. I blushed when I heard him call me that. No one has ever called me that. Then I started to get self conscious. "JJ...before we continue I want to know your intentions." "Y/N. I have been in love with you since the day we met. I was waiting for you for years. I realized you probably would never want me, so I started acting like a slut. But my intentions are to please you tonight and hopefully every night for the rest of our lives. Ya know if you let me ask you out." I couldn't stop the redness forming in my cheeks. I tried to put up a wall of confidence really fast. "Is that your way of asking Maybank? Or just what you say to all of your random hookups?" My eyebrow lifted as I stared into his gorgeous blue eyes. "Maybe it is, and I've never said that to anyone else, I cross my heart and hope to die." His eyes never left mine as he made the hand motions to go with his phrase. I trusted him. I trusted this man with my whole heart. I didn't say anything, I just attached my lips to his once again. This was going to be a long night and a good life.

(Authors Note: Let me know if you'd like a part two! I was going to write a whole sex scene but I thought this was already long enough.)

[the--rebel--fae]

May i have a platonic one shot between alastor x mother!reader? BUT MAKE IT ANGST

Like dude goes with vaggie and charlie to heaven sees his mom and shes horrified

Or it can be fluff if you want shes like overjoyed and moved to tears about seeing her baby boy again 😭 i apologize if this is weird i just need more of this man and his mom

A/n Hello my dear! No, it's not a weird request at all! I think it was actually quite sweet! Now, I hope you don't mind I did a mix of the two so hurt/comfort. Annnd Alastor might be a little ooc here, but I mean c'mon, he's seeing his mama for the first time in centuries. That'd make anyone soft. Anyhoot! On to the story!

Pairing: (Platonic) Alastor x Mom! reader

TW: None! Unless you count Hurt/comfort as a warning

Word Count: 802

Forever and Always

When Alastor asked to come with her and Vaggie to the meeting in heaven, to say she was uncertain was the understatement of the year. Hell, Vaggie was deadset against it. But Alastor was insistent. But it wasn’t his usual “Simply for entertainment!” excuse. He had this look on his face that was very un-Alastor-like. It was almost thoughtful to the point of seeming…hopeful or wistful. 

But as she and Vaggie looked at the scene before them, both with surprised looks on their faces, it made sense. It even made Charlie believe that Alastor wasn't as cruel as he tried to put on.

“Al? I-is that really you, my boy?” You said as you slowly stepped forward. You just barely came out of Heaven’s grocery store when you saw a group of people being led by Sera and Emily. One you recognized as Lucifer’s daughter–the resemblance was uncanny. And another must be her partner, with how she looks at Lucifer’s daughter. But the third person is what caused your heart to skip a beat. Could it really be? After all a mother never forgets her children.

For once Alastor dropped his usual uncanny smile that everyone was used to for a much softer one. Even the usual radio static was nowhere to be found in his voice. “Hello, mother.” He said softly.

“Mother?!” Everyone in the group exclaimed. 

“Now it makes sense why he wanted to come up with us Vaggie! Aww.” Charlie said.

Vaggie nodded but the stunned look never left her features. “Yea, I guess so.”

Sera cleared her throat. “Ehem, we’ll take our leave for now, but when you're done, just head straight to the building up ahead and the angel at the front desk will send for us. Come along, Emily.” She said as she gently pushed the now happily squealing seraphin forward.

You gave a nod of acknowledgment to Sera before coming to a stop in front of your son. You looked him over and felt tears prick in your eyes. “Oh Alastor, sweetie. You–you went to hell, didn’t you? And don’t you lie to me boy, I can see it plain as day with those clothes of yours.”

Alastor let out a sigh. He was looking forward to seeing his mother again, but this part? Not so much. “Not a thing could pass you, could it ma? Yes, I did indeed go to hell, but I can tell you I am thriving, why my radio broadcast is a complete hit down there!”

You let out a sigh of your own. You never would have thought that your precious boy would have ended up down there. You had a feeling in your gut that that might have been the case as the years went by and you didn’t see hide or hair of him up in heaven. “What could have you possibly done to end up in a place like that Alastor? I know I raised you better.”

Charlie and Vaggie both cringed at those words, he was definitely getting the old-fashioned parental scolding. But what they saw next, both Charlie and Vaggie wouldn’t have believed it if they didn’t see it for themselves. 

Alastor was frowning. 

Alastor looked down at the ground but then up at his mother’s face. He had to tell her. Maybe not all of it, but at least what started it all. Besides, who really wants to tell their beloved mother they became a serial killer? Not him. “I killed him, mother. I killed Father so he couldn’t hurt anyone ever again.” He met his mother's eyes practically begging her to understand. “I won’t apologize for it, he deserved it. For what he did to you, to us and he would have done it to multiple people that disgraceful–”

Before Alastor could finish his rant though he was cut off by the warmth of his mother's arms wrapped around him. His eyes widened in surprise. She was hugging him?

“I understand honey. Now I don’t approve of what you did and it saddens me you ended up down there, but no matter what I am your mother and I will always love you. Forever and always.”

Alastor felt his breath catch in his throat at his mother’s words. Forever and Always. That’s what they used to always say to each other back when he was alive. I will love you forever and always. He had to take a deep breath and shove any and all of his emotions back down to where they came from. He was still the Radio Demon for crying out loud! He had an image to keep. 

But he did hug his mother back. Because in this moment he wasn’t the Radio Demon. He was just his mother’s son. “Thank you, Mother. I love you forever and always.”

Hope you enjoyed the story! I'm usually not the best at angst, but I feel like I did pretty well on this one! Plus it's always fun making a not-so-soft character actually have a heart hehe.

And if you guys want even more stories--like maybe your own personalized several-page long one-shots or even a multi-chap fic take a look at my Etsy Shop! I do commissions! I even have listings for Hazbin Hotel!

[awkward-tension-art]

bad batch x artist (painter) reader?

I am SICK and have been traveling so please excuse any typos

Hunter

He’s gonna think your so talented, whether you paint land scapes, abstract, flowers, people etc

And he’s absolutely going to fuel your painting

Whenever the batch are on a planet with a market, he’s gonna try and find new paints for you

Even some brushes too!

I Hc that as a cadet, Hunter would doodle in his free time, so he might get back into it whenever you paint

So, some times, whenever your painting, he’ll sit nearby and start to doodle. Just the two of you in comfortable silence as you each do your own thing

Echo

Like Hunter, he’s going to also look for paints and stuff to gift you whenever the batch are on a friendly planet

He’s gonna go for the truly expensive, nice stuff. I’m talking stuff made from diamonds or shells or something

I can see Echo sitting next to you as you paint. There’s something so relaxing about the movements the brush makes on a canvas

Keeps whatever you paint. Unless you want to sell it, in which case, he’s gonna help you do that. Make sure you aren’t underselling your work

“Echo, we need the credits” “not at that price. You worked on this for several rotations. It’s worth at least double.”

Wrecker

Fascinated by everything you paint and how you paint it.

He is amazed by every work of art, no matter the style or subject matter

Gonna ask you to paint him. If you do he’s keeping it forever. For years. It’ll be hung up on the Marauder.

He’ll also brag about you and your talent a lot.

“My Cyare? Most talented artist. You want to see their work? Of course I’ll show you!”

He might accidentally break a few of your paint brushes. They’re fragile to him and sometimes he forgets his own strength.

But don’t worry! He’ll find you nicer, stronger ones to use!

Tech

Working on stuff together? Working on stuff together.

He will want to work on his own projects while you paint. You guys just spend relaxed, quiet time together as you do your own things.

He honestly loves the sounds of you painting. The brush on canvas. Mixing paints. All of that.

He might try his hand at painting if you teach him. He knows he’ll never be as talented as you, but he’s a quick learner

Painting isn’t something he’ll particularly stick to though. He prefers his own projects, but he really enjoyed learning from you.

Crosshair

Not going to lie, he’s actually kind of interested in painting when he sees you paint for the first time.

He has the eye for detail, and the patience for it as well.

So, after a while of being together, he’ll sheepishly ask if he can paint with you too. Just to try it, of course!

Turns out you might have found him a new hobby he enjoys

Like his brothers, if he sees some quality paints or brushes, he’ll get them to gift them to you.

Sometimes he likes to play a little game and at the beginning of a new painting, he’s gonna try and guess what it is

He gets it right a lot of time, to be honest. Like I said, he has the eye for detail.

Bonus:

Omega (platonic obv)

Gonna want to paint

She wants to learn! And ends up really enjoying it!

I mean, her brothers s/o is a talented artist! She wants to do what you do!

And she loves it. Is super proud of her first painting. Your the first person she shows <3

[sidsinning]

the movie aint better ya goofs (don't read if you don't wanna hear my slander lol,,,)

"Movie!Gabriel is better than show!Gabriel because he actually cares for his son and gets redeemed"

istg this fandom's obsession with redemption needs to END

Morally better character ≠ better writing

Can I just get a piece of media that tells kids "hey, ur abusive parent was an asshole, and even if they had humanity you do not need to reconcile and forgive them in the end" bc I feel like that's what show!Gabriel leans towards which is great

Gabriel barely talks to Adrien in the movie and suddenly when he sees him under CN's mask his entire reign of terror, his determination to see his dead wife again ends in a tearful hug lmao come on now

("but the ending where Adrien suddenly loves his dad again???"- Astruc has been pretty blunt on Twitter that this perfect society you see in S5's ending is built off of a lie, so Adrien is def not gonna just keep that view)

"Adrien actually stands up to his dad in the movie!"

Movie!Adrien is legit a normal human boy, not a sentimonster who is literally physically incapable of fighting back against whoever has his amok

He DOES fight back (even in S1 as CN!), but people like to remember the show only up to S3. Guess what, he learns to fight back and stand up for himself through his growing bonds and relationships with those around him through character development ✨✨✨

Also, he is an abused kid??? In the show?? How can you knock him down a peg for not fighting back,,, 😭 Adrien's lesson isn't that he needs to learn how to fight back, it's that Nathalie shoulda called cps sooner!!! In the movie they are much more of an estranged father-son pair than anything abusive. So obviously the back talk is much easier too. Movie!Adrien gets to go out alone and with friends unless his dad has specifically planted an enemy where he is. Show!Adrien has been beaten, mind controlled, forced to hurt Marinette, isolated and locked up, etc.- he has been TERRIFIED of his dad multiple times.

"Marinette isn't an obsessive stalker in this!"

SIGH.

Man I am so sick of this complaint- the show has never rewarded Marinette for her obsessive behavior. BC IT IS A CHARACTER FLAW. One they use for cringe comedic purposes, but a flaw nonetheless. Every time she has done anything that hurts others in pursuit of Adrien she is punished by the writers. And bc the show has an episodic monster-of-the-week format, this plot is recycled a lot (which is its own complaint). And guess what? SHE STOPS BEING OBSESSIVE. YEAH. SHE STOPS DOING THAT SHIT- so what do you want now??? She grew out of it after it costs her the miraculous so why tf are yalls still hurling this at her like its a L,,,,

This Marinette is just a watered down boring version of show!Marinette. She's just a girl who gets insecure at times but grows confident bc she's Ladybug. Ok. So is our Marinette but MORE. Our Marinette is super smart, creative, resourceful, an overthinker, extremely kind and selfless to others, gets jealous and reckless when her emotions get the better of her, etc. She is fully formed even after watching just 3 episodes of S1.

Like the fact that they didn't even bother to include the oh so important hook of the show- her lucky charm power- shows they didn't care about doing this story justice- its so transparently lazy writing 💀 (miraculous of creation where??? CN gets cataclysm for destruction but what is movie!LB bringing to the yin yang table,,,)

Legitimately all the comparisons I'm hearing from people saying the movie is better are from those who just aren't caught up with the show where Marinette is no longer toxically obsessive with Adrien, where the plot/lore is insane but 10000000x better and more creative than what the movie gave us, the love square was much better developed EVEN FROM JUST THE ORIGINS EPISODES, etc. Istg these people stopped at S3 where the show was at its worst (if I were to pinpoint it)

Everything is so watered down or changed for the worse

Adrienette bonding was 1 conversation and 2 seconds about his mom in a voiceless montage. Marinette didn't fall for him bc of his kindness after a misunderstanding, it was bc he looked handsome in the library's light lol. He called her weird and didn't think twice about putting on his earphones to listen to more alpha podcasts. You really do wonder why she likes this dude over her partner CN bc they have no connection at all.

Movie!Adrien was an asshole don't you dare do show!Adrien dirty by comparing him to this ellen degeneres alien lookin mf

When movie!Adrien is crying after Mari reveals herself as LB, unlike the show, here you're like "yeah no you only like her now bc she's LB lol"

Anyways feel free to enjoy what you enjoy but uuuuuhhhh this movie getting a 3/10 for me would not rewatch

Oh wait the good things

-Visuals

-Some Ladynoir scenes were cute, like them playfully fighting with the accidental wall pin

-I liked Ladybug moving away from CN's kiss- nice hint of angst

-Chloe's coffee stain scene

-Luka cameos were cute

songs were bad or mid

ya das it

I guess feel free to talk to me in my inbox about your own thoughts if you wish (respectfully plz)

[vulpisnocturna]

There was only one bed - Horny Akatsuki Edition

request by @takhidk 🤍

SOFT NSFW



Deidara:

-is completely speechless when he finds out there is only one bed at the inn during your mission together

-acts cocky though, telling you not to make a move on him

-he’s the first one to make a move, saying the bed is too small (he is literally 5’5” lmao) as he scoots closer to you

-you tease him about it and he tells you to shut up, his cheeks red

-he’s never had sex before but what he lacks in experience he makes up for with his enthusiasm

-you have to tell him that his hands are a gift, and how to use them, but he’s very happy to comply

-‘wouldn’t it be better to make the bed explode when I make you cum, hm?’ he asks, and you look at him, eyes wide

-‘no, Deidara. Unless you want this to never happen again’

-‘fine’

Obito:

-can’t believe himself. He hasn’t slept in the same bed with anyone ever

-decides to play dumb with his Tobi persona, hugging you like a pillow

-in reality, bro is dying to have you close to him

-after a while, though, he gets quite worked up, and decides he’ll have his fun with you. He can tell you want him by the way you casually move your ass against him, as if he couldn’t notice

-he blindfolds you and takes off his mask, starting to kiss your neck, letting his voice drop to his normal tone

-‘you know what happens to little things like you who poke the rattlesnake, right?’

Hidan:

-As soon as he sees there’s only one bed, he’s all for it

-‘I bet you asked for one bed, huh? Guess I’m just irresistible’ he grins cockily

-‘Yeah, right’ you say, rolling your eyes, though you have to admit he is hot.

-‘Let’s fuck’ he says, as forward as always. You stare at him, swallowing painfully

-When you hesitate, Hidan practically throws you on the bed, ripping the cloak off of you and licking your exposed chest

-‘Come on, sweetheart. Let’s have some fun, you and I’ he says, pulling your shirt up and starting to suck on your nipples, a bit too rough, but the pain soon mixes with the pleasure

Itachi:

-blinks and stands in the doorway, looking at the double bed. ‘There must have been a misunderstanding. I will solve it, don’t worry’ he says, disappearing towards the reception. You kind of hope they won’t have any other rooms, although the idea of sleeping with Itachi is both hot and terrifying

-when he comes back, he does not look too happy

-‘I am deeply sorry about this. They do not have any other rooms. I will sleep on the chair’ he says, removing his cloak as he goes in. You do the same, and you don’t fail to catch his eyes on you for a split second. As you get into bed, you stare at him, sucking in your lips

-‘Sleep on the bed, Itachi’ you say after a while. He looks at you, his throat bobbing before he slowly gets up and crawls under the blanket, staring at you. He wants to touch you, but it would be inappropriate. He can’t get himself to move. And yet, when you move closer to him and push your ass against him, he can’t contain himself and wraps a hand around your waist, pulling you closer

-‘Don’t think I don’t see what you’re doing. Let me indulge you, then’ he says, his hand slipping under your shorts as he starts to kiss your neck languidly

Pain:

-Is quite pissed off that he was not given two rooms, but when he looks at you, he can’t help but think this must have been fate

-and after all, he hasn’t had that chance in so long

-he saw the way you looked at him, with a blush on your cheeks and suggestive eyes

-‘lie down’ he says, tone authoritative, ‘and take off your clothes’

-you can’t believe your ears. Though when Pain gives you a meaningful look, you quickly do as he says, though you’re blushing and trembling with anticipation

-‘let’s make the most of this unfortunate situation, shall we?’ he says, running his hands on your thighs, splaying them open for him and staring at you with those hypnotic eyes

Kakuzu:

-is fuming at first. No one can mock him like this

-after that, though, he’s quite pleased with himself

-‘Less money to pay like this. We will do this from now on’

-‘Uhm… Kakuzu? Where are you going to sleep?’

-‘On the bed. I am going to get my money’s worth, brat’ he says, removing his headband and mask. You look at him, suddenly hyperaware. He’s… good-looking. For a 90-year old guy, he’s handsome

-when you shift slightly to find a comfortable position on the mattress, black tendrils catch your wrists and you find yourself tied up

-‘You’re a handful. Do not move’ he says, hovering above you. You think he’s going to knock you out cold, but instead, he positions himself between your legs

-‘I don’t want to hear a sound. Or else’

Kisame:

-laughs it off when you’re embarrassed that there’s only one bed

-‘I suppose there’s nothing to be done. Might as well get comfortable’ he says, taking off his cloak and his shirt. You stare at him, your lips parting at the muscles on his body

-‘It’s not a shop window. You can look and touch, if you want’ he says with a sharp grin

-You blush, nevertheless getting closer to him, until your hand is resting on his chest

-His large hands easily lift you up from your waist as he holds you against him until you have to wrap your legs around his hips

-‘I didn’t even need the bed, but since we’re here…’ he says, lowering you on the mattress and grinning as he unfastens your cloak

Sasori:

-‘I don’t need to sleep anyway’ he says, sitting at the desk and turning the lamp on as he starts tinkering with one of his puppets

-You frown, lying down on the bed. The noise of screwdrivers and nails clattering on the desk is pissing you off, and you decide to see if he really is a puppet who doesn’t feel anything at all

-you move your hand between your legs, underneath your underwear

-‘what are you doing?’ he asks, voice smooth, but he doesn’t turn around

-‘nothing’ you say, smirking slightly and gasping softly as you start to touch yourself on the bed.

-‘rude’ he says, and when you try to move, your hands are frozen. When you look at him, there are chakra strings connecting his hands to yours

-‘I suppose I can play with you instead of my puppets tonight’

Konan:

-Blushes when she sees that there’s only one bed and asks you if you want her to look for a different inn

-you tentatively tell her it’s okay

-when you two get into bed, you keep glancing at each other, and you keep looking at that piercing underneath her lip, wondering what it would be like to kiss her and feel it against your lips

-when she moves, you’re frozen in place

-her lips are soft and you do feel the coldness of the metal on your bottom lip, but it’s quite a nice feeling

-Konan gets on top of you, continuing to make out with you, neither of you saying anything as you start to undress each other

-literally the most normal experience you’re gonna get in the Akatsuki, and she’s stunning too! Go you

Zetsu:

-watches you sleep like a creep

-sorry, I got nothing on this “guy”

[harrystylesfan2686]

Pieces Part 5

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Summary: Az finally gets his chance but not without warnings.

A/N: first of, I wanna say thank you to everyone who supported when things went down with that anon. I love you all so much and I'm so happy you guys are with me. I admit I was a 🤏tad demotivated to write this part but when I reread all your comments and reminded myself how much you guys love this story, I put on my thinking hat and got to work again. I hope you guys like this part!! And plzzzz don't put hate comments on someone's account, for you it just takes like a minute to type and send but for that person it will be stuck on their mind for a long time.

Pieces Masterlist

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

Standing in front of your mate's room should be happy and exciting, not anxious and scary.

I finally built up enough courage to come to River House and meet Azriel. See how he's doing and figure out if he deserves another chance. When I told my friends about this, they told me I should do this only if I feel ready to do so, not because I'm felling sympathetic over Azriel.

They're right. And I'm doing this because I'm ready.

I remind myself that when I raise my hand and knock on the door. Cassian told me which room he was staying in, he didn't need to though, I could guess which room it was judging from the fact that it's in the end of the hallway and is covered in darkness when it's still day outside.

Maybe I should've given him a warning before coming and burging in so suddenly... Oh well.

I knock again when the door doesn't open and wait for another five minutes. I frown and step closer to that door. "Azriel? It's me." I hesitantly speak and go to knock again but the door abrutly opens and I flinch back.

There he stands.

The most beautiful male I've ever seen. With bright hazel and wide wings on his back. He's shirtless, standing just in his pants.

Breathing heavy he takes me in, observing me just as I do him. I see exactly what Mor was talking about. His face looks sucked in and body more lean, covered in shadows just as I thought.

But he's still the most amazing male I've ever seen.

I smile softly. "May I come in?"

His eyes widen as though he doesn't believe what I'm saying. I don't too.

I chuckle. "I just wish to talk."

"I-uh. Yes. Of course." He clears his throat and opens the door wider for me come in. He hurriedly tries to fix the room a little, picking up cloths or dishes that were on the floor and quicky takes out a shirt to wear it while I close the door behind us. I stand in the middle of the room and he comes in front of me when he deems himself more presentable.

The room seems a little brighter. He clears his throat again while we stand in front of each other. The awkwardness is clear to the both of us as we wait for the other to speak. He decides to go first.

"You look beautiful." He speaks softly and my heart instanty melts. I mumble a small thanks and stand a little straighter, ready to say what I came here to say. I look into his eyes with a firm expression.

"I've been thinking. This month has been, well, different to say the least. It's taught me that if I have to, I can perfectly live happily with myself. I don't need you to go on with my life." His face falls but he nods. "But I want you." His eyes snap to mine.

"I won't lie. I love you, Azriel. But I will not take you back unless you make it up to me. You broke my heart. You broke my trust. And now, as foolish as I am," I shake my head."I'm giving you another chance. One Last Chance. If you mess up again, that will be it. I will leave and I will never come back. Doesn't matter how much our hearts and sauls ach. Understand?" He nods.

"Words, Azriel."

"Yes! Yes. Of course. I promise you I will never do anything like this again." He looks at me with hopeful eyes.

"Alright. Now rules, first you don't get me back. You have to win me back. Court me, properly. And I will think about it evertime you do something meaningful." He spills out an of course.

"Second, no talking to Elain. I mean, you can talk but you have to make time for me too." I frown.

"You don't have to worry about that. I've already pushed Elain out of my life. The second I came here and she asked of me, I firmly told her that I will never speak to her again. She cried but I don't care. I kicked her out of this room and slamed the door at her face. You're more important." He breaths.

"Third, final rule, this is not a one week thing Azriel. You have to understand that you will have to make up for a long time. I had suffered for an entire year, you have a year to make up to."

"I promise you, my love. I will make up to you. I will win your back. And this time, I won't let you go."

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●

Tag list: @cleverzonkwombatsludge @going-through-shit @wallacewillow0773638 @kalulakunundrum @cat-or-kitten @pricklepearbloom @bxm-1012 @peachcontour-blog @fxckmiup @ohthemisssery @crazylokonugget @anuttellaa

[delirious-donna]

Sweet As A Grape [Part Three]

story summary: Levi isn’t hungry, or so that’s what he claims. A vampire must drink to survive, and his sire refuses to let the man give up without trying every trick up his sleeve. When a new ‘donor’ appears, one who is different from all the rest, will Levi be able to keep resisting?

pairing: Levi Ackerman (vampire) x female reader (human)

warnings: we're starting to cook with a little gas in this chapter, it stays mostly SFW with heavy NSFW implied, reader ends the chapter up close and very personal with Mr Ackerman, mentions of suicide (vampire), a very brief allusion to the argument regarding a person's right to choose to die (the two prev tags are heavy but these are not discussed in depth at this point in the story - this is a future heads up), mention of parental loss, lots of chat regarding blood drinking and the methods used, teasing of fear play, vampire lore

Part Two | Masterlist | Part Four

Levi appeared more composed than the last time you saw him.

His dark hair was slicked back, and he clasped his hands behind his back whilst staring out the window displaying the majesty of the sprawling gardens below. For a moment, you admired his posture; spine straight and proud, chest slightly forward and his feet spread in what reminded you of a very militaristic stance.

He really was a handsome man, even when a scowl wrinkled his features and hardened those mesmerising grey eyes. A stiff white dress shirt was tucked into neat black trousers. With the top two buttons undone and no tie in sight, the outfit gave him the appearance of a businessman who had not long clocked off for the day.

It made you wonder what it might be like to have known him in a more traditional sense. Perhaps having met him in a bar frequented by office workers and finding the nerve to strike up a conversation after many weeks of admiring him from a safe distance. You gave a small shake of your head at how absurd the idea was. For how little you knew of Levi, socialising in loud overpopulated bars did not seem something he would have ever enjoyed.

“Something wrong?” Levi asked, tilting his head towards where you stood by the door. He gave you a look that made you feel like he already knew what you were thinking, and it only further cemented how right your train of thought was.

With a flush rushing across your cheeks, you moved further inside and glanced around. “No, of course not. What makes you say that?”

“Your heart rate spiked.”

“Oh… well, it’s hard to argue with a human lie detector,” you quipped back.

“Am I?”

You frowned in puzzlement. “Are you what?”

Levi finally turned fully to face you, his eyes followed your every step and focused on how your fingertips trailed the soft leather of the oxblood couch. “Am I human?”

“… I suppose the answer is both yes and no,” you mused, biting your lip at the weighty question. An ethical tête-à-tête was not what you had assumed would be on the agenda for this evening, but Levi had surprised you at every turn up ‘til now that to expect the unsuspected was becoming the norm.

“Unless I have my facts entirely wrong, all vampires were human once so I would still believe you to be human to a certain degree. Although I know it would be pretty dumb of me to think of you as only that. The world has been led to believe that being turned doesn’t change a person’s inherent personality, but I guess that could be lies told to soothe the nerves of us, mere humans.”

His lips twitched, a smile almost rising before he schooled his features back to neutrality. You still took it as a small victory.

“Interesting,” he replied mildly. His hand stretched out, perfectly pale with raised blue veins leading to knuckles that appeared rougher than you anticipated. It gave the allusion of someone who had used his fists a lot in his life, and again, you wondered about this man and who he really was. “Shall we sit?”

Erwin had insisted that the arranged date—although Levi was not keen on the term—would take place under his roof, another fact that grated at Levi’s nerves. The reasoning was sound given what had happened in the brief time you had spent with the man so far, and whilst he had wished to refuse the circumstances foisted on him, it made more sense for this to be a concession he conceded to.

The billiards room had become more of a gentleman’s clubroom over the last several decades, far more accustomed to informal meetings and underhanded deals than simple games of snooker. A plush leather couch centred the room with two matching armchairs positioned at either end. The actual billiards table was more towards the far away side of the room, handily near the well-stocked liquor cabinet and expensive cigar humidor, the latter leaving the remnants of tobacco lingering in the air and soaked into the walls.

If he concentrated long enough, Levi could perfectly recall moments spent in here with Erwin and Miche, sometimes Nile and Hange too. Better times… he thought, or at least times when no one was at each other’s throats, not like now.

Seated in the middle of the oxblood couch, you crossed one ankle over the other and waited to see where Levi would choose to sit. There was ample space on either side of you, which is why you had chosen the middle. You didn’t want to trap yourself in a corner so to speak, but in the end, it didn’t matter.

Levi sat in the armchair to your right. His thighs spread wide, and he smoothed a hand down the leg of his trousers as if there were some imaginary wrinkles in what you assumed to be expensive fabric. “Would you like a drink?”

You glanced at the crystal decanter set out on the table in front of you, ironically or not, it seemed three-quarters full of red wine and you couldn’t help but wonder if this was Erwin’s idea of humour.

As if sensing the direction of your thoughts, Levi gave a throaty chuckle that made you think of a standoffish feline finally coming close enough to rub against your leg. “I can assure you it is wine. Feeding blood to a human wouldn’t be wise, especially when everyone seems keen for you to be a match for me.”

“Right. It wouldn’t be much fun if I was to ruin this beautiful carpet by being sick. I’ll stick with the water, keep a clear head and all that.”

Levi inclined his head and stood to pour you a tall glass of iced water. He placed it on a coaster, and you chewed your lip, deciding if you would ask or not. The question weighed heavily on your shoulders, his comment only increasing the worry that was bearing down hard. There seemed to be this almost palpable air of desperation for this union to work… union felt like the wrong word but every time you considered it only transactional also felt wrong—even more so.

“Why is everyone so keen, and by everyone, I mean Mr Smith? He’s quite the character… I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone like him.”

“You’re aware that I haven’t been drinking. There are a lot of reasons for that, and I wouldn’t want to bore you with the details,” he supplied after more than a second or two of silence. He had zero desire to lay out nearly half a century’s worth of infighting that led him to his current decision and even less desire to discuss his sire. There were other things he wasn’t going to tell you, but those memories remained locked away in the recesses of his mind—dark and full of cobweb-covered skeletons.

“I guess, in a nutshell, I’ve decided I don’t want to continue my existence. I’ve spent long enough wandering this earth and it’s time that I become a part of the soil instead.”

You blinked.

You blinked again.

Surely, you hadn’t heard him right. How could this man who appeared so alive despite his status as undead suddenly be snuffed out of existence? A lump lodged fast in your throat as past discussions and memories started to rush out faster than you could shut them down. This was effectively vampire suicide, and the old arguments about a person’s right to die resurfaced, the scars on your soul not yet healed.

“Hm. I didn’t take you for the selfish type,” you remarked, forcing your hand not to shake as you reached out for your glass of water. The icy liquid slid awkwardly down your throat, barely touching the burning itch.

“The… excuse me?”

“You heard me perfectly, isn’t that one of the traits that vampires boast about? I heard you could hear a pin drop in the next city if you tried.”

Levi visibly bristled. “Oh ho, and that’s all we are to you I suppose. A handful of parlour tricks in human form. Would you like to see me turn into a bat or walk on the ceiling next?”

“Selfish and touchy, noted,” you added, crossing and recrossing your legs whilst irritation prickled at your spine. It was stupid to let this colour your opinion of him, but knowing what you did, it was hard to set aside your experiences and more so your prejudices.

“Why is my decision regarding my existence selfish? In fact, forget it.” Levi threw his back into the armchair, seething at your childish reaction and not realising the irony of his own behaviour. “Even in terms of my mortal years, I’m older than you are. You’re young, you’re naïve, you’re—”

“Furious that I’m sitting here being insulted,” you interrupted with a derisive huff. “Why did you even ask to see me again when you so obviously aren’t interested in my blood or any blood for that matter?”

The song that had risen in volume and pitch from the moment he sensed you descending from the guest quarters upstairs was now a deafening war cry that spoke of retribution. The most beautiful, frenzied bloodbath of fury and might. He didn’t have to love you, nor did he have to like you, but he could not deny his attraction to the life force that flowed hot and fast through your veins. He was interested alright, very interested.

Long hours of the previous night had been spent pouring over textbooks in search of answers and all he had found was vampiric fairytales at best. The myth of a vampire meeting his blood singer and finding comfort from them in a way that was impossible from any other living or immortal creature. There was no mystical bond to speak of, no binding vow of love or even compassion. For some reason that had brought relief to Levi, although when he scratched the surface, he knew it was his inherent dislike of having events dictated to him at the root.

Fate was for the weak and Levi had never been weak.

“Do you have any idea how difficult it is to be starving whilst a five-course meal sits so close?” He asked slowly, calmly, although he felt far from it. “My insides are burning with the desire to pull you from that fucking couch and drape you over my lap whilst I feast from your neck… shit… maybe your breasts.”

He watched intently whilst you wriggled in your seat, shuffling surreptitiously to the side away from him like that would help in the slightest. The heat that radiated from your skin intensified, blood just below the surface and its sweet citrusy scent mingled with something heavier… oh.

Levi smiled, careful to show the sharp points of his canines which had not fully dropped from his gums but were still capable of inflicting enormous damage. You were aroused. There was a fire in you, and he liked that. He could kick himself for that very fact, but here he was, taking you in leisurely just to see you squirm.

“I-I don’t understand you,” you admitted, despising how breathy and subservient you sounded.

At every turn, he had snarled and lashed out like a cornered predator. He was an enigma, and this was not the job you thought it would be, had hoped it would be. You didn’t know your next move—whether you should cut your losses now and tap out for good or if there was even a chance at salvaging whatever kind of relationship this was becoming.

“No one does,” he said with a sad smile, “not even I do at times.”

“Is this how it normally goes or am I fucking this up?”

Levi ran a hand through his hair and sat forward, his elbows braced on his knees and his fingers steepled. “So, I was right when I said you were a vir—new to this.”

You nodded, cautious given how his smile had turned brighter.

“No. This is not how any kind of vampire – donor exchange usually goes. There are several options and it’s down to the participants, but I doubt many butt heads like we seem to. Do you want me to explain further? I would have thought this was something you knew coming into this gig.”

“I know that there are those that prefer to keep it purely transactional… they open your vein and drink until you ask them to stop, or they feel your heart slow. Some like to know their donor personally; likes, dislikes, career aspirations, taste in food, music etc.”

Levi listened whilst you spoke like you were running a seminar for new donors. He wouldn’t be surprised to learn you had memorised a recruitment pamphlet. His gaze wandered leisurely from your face down to the modest dress you had chosen to wear. The hem reached below your knee, very conservative, but he knew if you were to straddle his waist as he imagined, it would be forced to ride up and expose your thighs.

His tongue wet his lips and he wondered how long it had been since he had last spent time between someone’s thighs, whether it be to drink blood or the nectar of arousal… too long. He could compel you, but he didn’t want to. It was prohibited for any vampire to use mind tricks; most humans weren’t aware it was even possible, though the media and fiction speculated it was and the ones pulling the strings from the top wanted to keep it as purely speculation.

Levi knew that Erwin wouldn’t care, the means to an end rarely mattered and when that end would be to see Levi return to his side, it was even more reason to look the other way. Your mind was strong, of that he was certain, and there was likely no chance of invading through your mental defences without your suspicions rising.

However, above all else he wanted you to choose.

“Blah blah blah. Yes yes. And some like to enact their primal desires and have their little human donor run for their life through the woods,” Levi interjected with a cunning smile.

The colour drained from your face. You had heard of that, though it was supposed to be extremely rare and one of the most highly paid positions given the dangerous nature.

“Is that…?”

“No,” he answered, guessing your question. “Whilst the thrill of the hunt can be exhilarating, fear alters the taste and I prefer my blood on the sweet side.”

Thoughts of dashing through a thickly wooded forest in a white gauzy gown whilst Levi chased you down like a starved beast tumbled through your head. The fear he spoke of melted into something else, confusing and forbidden, but not unpleasant. You took a long gulp of the water, throat working fast but you reached the bottom of the glass all too quickly.

Levi canted his head. “I could… make an exception.” Two fingers rubbed across the width of his lips, thinking.

His body was reacting to the implications swirling in his mind and yours, not that he was reading your thoughts. Not that he needed to when they were so obviously written across your face and expressed in your not-so-subtle body language. Your hips swivelled in his direction, and your breathing became laboured which in turn forced your breasts to heave upward against the hold of your dress’s sweetheart neckline.

You were temptation wrapped in velvet. Temptation wrapped in velvet and only inches away.

He desperately needed to change the subject and regain the control that was slipping with every second that passed where you weren’t sitting on his lap as he wanted. His fingertips tightened into the leather of the armchair, the buttery soft material groaning from the exertion.

“Why did you choose to pursue this line of work? It’s not for the fainthearted,” he asked slowly, carefully choosing his words and tone to at least give the impression of calm control.

The unpredictable nature of this conversation was throwing you for a loop. You straightened, trying to compose yourself and articulate an answer that was honest but did not give away more than you intended. You had your reasons, and there were many, but some were more personal than others.

“Financial stability. I want to provide a retirement that my dad deserves and give me the breathing space to pursue dreams that might not be lucrative but will make me happy. Plus, I’ve always wondered what it might be like… y’know, to be bitten. I’ve heard it only hurts if the vampire wants it to hurt.”

You were holding back, but he could understand that. He wasn’t telling you everything so why should you?

“Retirement fund for just your father? What about your mother?”

A familiar stab of pain assaulted your heart, your smile faltering. “She died. Six years ago. It’s just me and Dad now, and I want him to give up his work so he can see out the rest of his years in peace after everything he went through.”

“My condolences,” Levi offered, inclining his head and choosing to move away from the subject. “We can prevent it from hurting—the bite, I mean. There are different ways to achieve the same effect, and like the act itself, we have our preferred methods.”

“And yours would be?” Sweat coated your palms despite the ambient temperature. Finally, you were getting somewhere.

“How about I demonstrate? Not that I am going to bite you right now, to be clear,” he quickly elaborated when your heart rate nearly shot through the roof.

Levi stretched out a hand, waiting to see if you would place yours within it. The decision only took half a second of thought. Your curiosity far outweighed the possible repercussions. One minute you were sat apart and the next you were blinking into eyes of swirling mercurial grey.

His hand anchored at your hip, fingertips squeezing with a firmness that told of his desire to keep you right there. Your dress was forced upward to accommodate the width of his posture, for a slighter-built man he had a way of imposing his presence regardless of actual size. Tentatively, your fingers brushed his shoulder and he glanced at your arm before meeting your eyes once more.

You had expected him to feel cool to the touch, but the truth couldn’t be further from that. Heat invaded your face at the proximity, a shyness brought your eyes down into a flutter of lashes and shallow breaths.

“Tell me to stop and I will,” Levi murmured.

Why you believed him unconditionally wasn’t apparent, but your slow nod came anyway as you gave in to your instincts. Exploratory fingertips traced across the now exposed skin of your thigh. You could feel the rough whorls of his prints in each sweep, callouses scratching pleasantly against the smoothness of your skin. A fire kindled low in your belly, a desire to fuel it further by leaning in and learning the subtle undertones of the cologne or soap he preferred barely held at bay.

“Can I… touch you too?”

 “You already are. I would have stopped you if I wasn’t okay with it,” he assured.

“Mhm, okay.”

The words were more for your own reassurance than his. Without further thought, you brought your other hand to his hair and ran your fingers through the slicked-back length. Levi let his head fall back at the action, eyes falling low-lidded and his hips shifting beneath you. The blunt edges of your nails caught against his scalp as you worked them through and brought the front strands forward to frame his forehead.

“Better,” you mused quietly with a smile. “I like your hair loose.”

“That so? I’ll remember that.” Levi fought the urge to purr at the affection he had gone so long without. Your touch was cautious but attentive, it made him thicken behind his trousers until the bite of the restricting fabric was near unbearable.

He was barely resisting from burying his nose into the crook of your neck, already he could see the glisten of sweat decorate your décolleté and images of chasing a droplet with his tongue consumed his thoughts. The melody of your blood was different now that you were closer, more intimate. It weaved a song of desire around Levi and tightened the threads already surrounding his heart. This was meant to be a demonstration of how to make the experience of giving blood pleasurable, but somehow the reason you were sat here became obscured behind a yearning so intense it twisted his gut into knots.

“Is it always this intimate?” You asked and the question broke the spell enough that he could blink through the fog that had descended.

Levi shook his head and then thought better of it. “It can be. Not always. I prefer my partner to be aroused enough that they aren’t thinking about what I’m taking. Instead, they focus on what I’m giving them.”

“Giving…? Oh. T-That’s interesting. Uhm—do you have sex with your partners?”

“It has happened on occasion. Most of the time I feed them enough of the feelings associated with sexual pleasure that the physical act isn’t needed, nor do I usually want to take it that far. I could have demonstrated all of this without you leaving your seat,” he admitted without knowing why.

That made you pause. If he had the power to do that then why bother? Why have you this close and why let you touch him freely in return? Your brow furrowed only to be smoothed by his thumb stroking the crease between your eyes.

“I was curious if this intensity would continue or if the spell you’ve managed to weave would break if I could just get my hands on you,” he supplied without question.

You swallowed thickly, stubbornly ignoring the throbbing pulse between your legs. “And has it?”

His hand slid along your jaw and rounded to the back of your neck. The grip forced your mouth into an oval of surprise, damn near panting until he shook his head and pulled you in.

The moment his lips met yours, your world shifted on its axis and became engulfed in blue fire. It felt both right and wrong to step across this line so easily, so carelessly. You marvelled at how soft his kiss was, tentative and inquisitive all at once as he led you deeper down the rabbit hole.

Your hips dropped you closer to his pelvis, his hand tangled in your hair, one exploring your waist and the curve that led to the swell of your breasts. His touch set every inch of you alight, and you dared to push your tongue inside his mouth when he exhaled a sigh. You explored his teeth' sharp length, knowing that one false move would see your blood spill freely onto his awaiting tongue.

That was what broke him.

Levi grasped at your arms and tore his mouth from yours with a guttural gasp. His chest heaved from the fight that raged within. His gums tingled as his canines extended in preparation for a meal, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He wanted to. Every fibre of his being screamed for him to draw your neck taut and let his bite push you over the edge of euphoria. He knew that you would sound so fucking sweet, the sounds you elicited were already playing on repeat in his head and they would only be all the sweeter if he could get you naked beneath him.

“Not like this… it’s not fair.”

“Levi—if it helps, I want this.”

He shook his head with a bark of laughter. You didn’t know what you were saying, anyone would think the same but then again, he wasn’t using any compulsion over you. He hadn’t even tried to pierce the veil of your mind, so, maybe you did want this?

“You are going to be the death of me,” Levi admitted, letting his forehead rest against yours.

Swallowing his pride, he couldn’t let you leave without knowing you wouldn’t look for someone else within Erwin’s syndicate to offer your companionship to. He listened to the siren call a few seconds longer before leaning back and taking your chin between his fingers.

“Will you be mine?”

[rius-cave]

awww man :(

I was watching a Q n A with Vivzie and she kinda confirmed Adam won’t be coming back - she didn’t say it *exactly* but she kinda implied it

maybe she’s just trying not to spoil it or smth or am I just being desperate idk…

Literally tweeted about this 2 days ago sdkfjsdk

I've been saying this to people but I think it's worth giving my opinion on it.

Some people think she's lying, and I don't blame them, but the way the interview was held and the way she was answering don't make sense to say that she's lying. The question wasn't even about Adam, or about characters that are dead for real, it's like it was just a tangent thought that she was reminded of when she thought of dead characters. If she was trying to hide that Adam is coming back, she just wouldn't mention him to begin with unless the interviewer asked her directly, otherwise why even mention it at all if you want to keep it a secret? Also, to my knowledge, Vivzie isn't one to just outright lie about plot details, unless I'm really missing something. What I've seen is that she just says "I can't answer that" or "I guess you'll have to wait and see!" and the like.

I was pretty skeptical of his return to begin with, so while I am disappointed, I always knew Adam was much more of a plot device for Vivzie than an actual character to be explored and dissected. Which is fine, characters serve different purposes, not every character can have a 3 season arc. I know it's frustrating to us because we fell in love with him, but I also would like to remind people of something.

Adam is just a fictional character. Yes, it's disappointing, yes you can be mad, but at the end of the day Hazbin is just a show and Adam is just a bunch of pixels. So what if he's dead frfr in canon?? If you find joy in his character, you can keep doing so! Since when do we let canon stop us from enjoying things?? He got like a whopping 15 minutes of screen time and him not coming back is what blows it for you?? He is literally not real, he can keep living in our imagination, in our art and our fics, and he can keep having whatever value you want to give him because, again, he's not real.

I, PERSONALLY, was bummed for a bit, and then decided that it doesn't change much for me. I will still keep watching Hazbin cause well, there are other things I enjoy about the show besides Adam, and most of what I enjoy about his character isn't even canon anyway lol

So yeah, if Vivzie is killing him off for real, I'm gonna take full custody of him. Sorry Viv, he's my character now, bye.

[yazthebookish]

House of Flame and Shadow

Prologue and Chapter 1 reading updates

(Warning: spoilers below!!)

Prologue (Lidia's POV)

Morven and Einar are pieces of shit.

I guess Cormac is gone for good 💔

At least we got some descriptions of how some of the other Asteri look like. It still bothers me Rigelus chose the form of a 17-year-old boy. Ugh what a creep.

"Quinlan and Athalar are mates. She will return to this world because of that bond. And when she does, she will go straight to him."

THEY 👏🏼 ARE 👏🏼 MATES 👏🏼

"Athalar and Baxian dangled unconscious from the ceiling, their torsos patchworks of scars and burns. And their backs..."

The Asteri better start counting their fucking days.

"Lidia couldn't look at the third figure hanging between them. Couldn't get a breath down near him."

UGH!!!!

"Baxian still hung unconscious. Pollux had beaten him into a bloody pulp last night after severing his and Athalar's wings with a blunt-toothed saw. The Helhound didn't so much as stir."

Pollux I hope you'll burn in the deepest pit of Hell and get to have the worst death in the history of SJM character deaths.

"They'd never spoken mind-to-mind outside of their dreaming, but she'd been trying since he'd arrived here. Again and again, she'd cast her mind toward his. Only silence answered."

This sounds a whole lot like a Daemati. Like I'm still not sure if she is but it seems like it.

---

Chapter 1 (Bryce's POV)

"The darkness seemed inherent to the three people standing across from her: a petite female in gray silk, and two winged males clad in black scalelike armor, one of them-the beautiful, powerful male in the center of the trio— literally rippling with shadows and stars. Rhysand, he'd called himself. The one who looked so much like Ruhn."

Let's fucking gooooo!!

"You said your name is Bryce Quinlan. That you come from another world —Midgard." Rhysand murmured to the winged male beside him. Translating, perhaps.

Yes Rhys show us how useful your Duolingo lessons were.

Rhys seems to be agitated about her.

Master of spinning bullshit, indeed. "So maybe I'm here for that. Maybe the sword sensed that dagger and ... brought me to it." Silence. Then the silent, hazel-eyed warrior laughed quietly. How had he understood without Rhysand translating? Unless he could simply read her body language, her tone, her scent—The warrior spoke with a low voice that skittered down her spine. Rhysand glanced at him with raised brows, then translated for Bryce with equal menace, "You're lying."

Bryce, honey, that's the Spymaster of the Night Court.

"I just watched my mate and my brother get captured by a group of intergalactic parasites," she snarled. "I have no interest in doing anything except finding a way to help them." Rhysand looked to the warrior, who nodded, not taking his gaze off Bryce for so much as a blink. "Well," Rhysand said to Bryce, crossing his muscled arms. "That's true, at least."

Not Azriel functioning as Rhysand's personal lie detector. Impressive though.

" I do not pry where I am not willingly invited." Bryce lurched back in the chair, nearly knocking it over at the smooth male voice in her mind. Rhysand's voice. But she answered, thanking Luna for keeping her own voice cool and collected, "Code of mind-speaking ethics?"

LOLOLOLOLOL 🤣🤣🤣🤣

"So this is it, then. This is where we-the Midgard Fae— originated. My ancestors left this world and went to Midgard. .. and we forgot where we came from."

The theory I had since before even HOSAB came out is finally confirmed. I mean it was semi-confirmed in HOSAB but some readers still debated it.

The corner of Rhysand's mouth curled upward. "We will not torture it from you, nor will I pry it from your mind. If you choose not to talk, it is indeed your choice. Precisely as it will be my choice to keep you down here until you decide otherwise."

Bryce couldn't stop herself from coolly surveying the room, her attention lingering on the grate and the hissing that drifted up from it. "'ll be sure to recommend it to my friends as a vacation spot."

Of course Rhys has to pull the "choice" speech whenever he can 🤣 also, BRYCE LOL!!!

"You haven't seen it in fifteen thousand years, or spoken this language in nearly as long-which lines up pertectly with the timeline of the Starborn Fae arriving in Midgard."

So they exist in the same timeline then but Midgard happens to be more advanced.

"It is in our history, Rhysand," Amren said gravely. "But the Asteri were not known by that name. Here, they were called the Daglan."

Asteri are the Daglan, we guessed as much in HOSAB but that's another theory confirmed now!

"Azriel, without Rhysand to translate, watched in silence. Bryce could have sworn shadows wreathed him, like Ruhn's, yet... wilder. The way Cormac's had been."

Ruhn's darkness seemed more similar to Rhys, but Cormac was close to what we know of Shadowsingers. But if Shadows are an Avallen Fae's gifts then how is Azriel one? We're told Shadowsingers are not specific to any courts but there are no Shadowsinger Fae in Midgard than Avallen Fae. But Azriel has a unique way with his shadows (given that magic is more powerful in Prythian.

"The Veritas orb?" Amren said, and Azriel lifted an eyebrow.

Oh damn.

Rhysand mastered himself, a cool mask sliding into place. "You live in such a world." It wasn't entirely a question. But Bryce nodded. "Yes." "And they want to bring all of that ... here." "Yes." Rhysand stared ahead. Thinking it through. Azriel just kept his eyes on the space where the orb had displayed the utter destruction of her world. Dreading-and yet calculating. She'd seen that look before on Hunt's face. A warrior's mind at work.

She showed them the destruction and all the weapons the Asteri have. She even showed them Rigelus. Rhys, Azriel, and even Amren seem at a loss for words.

Bryce examined the silver bean that lay smooth and gleaming in her hand. Amren said without looking at her, "You swallow it, and it will translate our mother tongue for you. Allow you to speak it, too." "Fancy," Bryce murmured.

Of course they have a pill for translating any language and here we've been pondering about how they would communicate.

Amen turned to Rhysand and said in that new, strange language -their language: "The glowing letters inked on her back... they're the same as those in the Book of Breathings."

Oooooh Leshon Hakodesh 👀

Then Azriel said in a soft, lethal voice, "Explain or you die."

Holy hell that's hot—I mean—Azriel that's not a way to treat a woman chill the fuck out.

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And we got to the end. This is what SJM only had available on her website. 4 more days until I get the full book and continue then 🤩!!

Also, Azriel's shadows seem to be around and thriving after all 😌 I recall being told they're gone for good based on HOSAB's ending, not that I took it seriously Lol.