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kira-akira · 9 months ago

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What I Want You To Know About Long COVID

Well lads, I've been suffering from Long COVID for over a year now. My life is at a complete standstill. I'm 25 years old and I'm too sick to go back to school, I can't work, I had to move back in with my parents and I'm still stuck here.

Here are just a few things I wish people knew about Long COVID, including things I didn't know myself until I got it.

COVID destroys your immune system. Yes, even if you don't have Long COVID. Are you getting sick more often now? When you get sick, does it last longer? There are many studies showing that COVID causes t cell depletion, even in mild COVID cases! T cells are how your body remembers how to fight off infections you've had before so losing those cells? Bad news.

Your initial infection can be mild and you can still get Long COVID. Right from Yale Medicine, "Most people with Long COVID had mild acute COVID." (This is also a good link for a basic Long COVID overview).

There can be a gap of time between when you "get better" from the initial COVID infection to the onset of Long COVID symptoms. Some people get sick with an initial COVID infection and never get better. Some get better and then weeks or months later start developing Long COVID symptoms. Long COVID symptoms can even fluctuate over time, can go away for months and then suddenly come back.

So many people have Long COVID and don't realize it. Do you feel more tired lately but no matter how much you sleep, nothing helps? Is it harder to concentrate at work or school? Can you just not think like you used to? You could have Long COVID and not even know it. Even mild post-COVID symptoms are still Long COVID.

COVID can do anything to your body. Long COVID has over 200 recognized symptoms and can affect basically any part or system of your body. There is no one mechanism or cause of Long COVID which unfortunately also means there's no one cure either.

The effects of COVID are cumulative. Each COVID reinfection increases your chances of developing Long COVID. COVID is also affecting your body in other ways, yes, even if you're otherwise young and healthy! "Repeat COVID-19 infections increase risk of organ failure, death".

Once you have Long COVID, repeat COVID infections will make your symptoms worse. "80% [of Long COVID patients] saw their symptoms worsen [from reinfection]. In 60% of people who were in recovery or remission from Long COVID, reinfection caused a recurrence of Long COVID."

There is a lot more I want to say about Long COVID but I want to keep this post at least somewhat manageable to read. Like how when COVID is contracted during pregnancy, those COVID-exposed fetuses have a 6.3-fold increased risk of motor developmental delays, or that another study found 50% of babies exposed to COVID in utero had developmental delays.

You need to keep caring about COVID, for others around you and also for yourself even if you're "healthy". Everyone is at risk. And don't forget 40-60% of COVID infections are asymptomatic, which is why masking even if you feel fine is crucial. The only way right now to not get Long COVID is to not get COVID in the first place. It's not too late, if you've stopped masking it's never too late to start again! I know it's easy to get distracted by things in your life that seem more real than the possibility of getting sick some time in the future, and the peer pressure to not mask can be intense. But it only feels less real or less important until your entire life is having Long COVID. Trust me.

I know this is a complicated issue, many people can't afford to stay home when sick even if they want to because of their jobs, there are disgusting policies trying to ban wearing masks, but please if you can. Keep masking. Masking works, masking saves lives.

This post got a bit longer than I wanted so below the cut is a non-exhaustive list of my Long COVID symptoms and some of my experiences as one of the "healthy young people" who got "unlucky". cw brief mention of suicidal ideation.

Welcome to the Thunderdome that is my body with Long COVID. Keep in mind these are just my experiences and symptoms, Long COVID can cause any range of symptoms at varying severities.

Dysautonomia: Exercise intolerance, Post-Exertional Malaise (PEM), fatigue, and heat intolerance. What do those things mean? Here's some specific examples. Absolutely terrible circulation I am so cold all the time but also, if I get a little too warm I will pass out. Eating hot food makes my heart rate spike, I sweat, my body feels heavy. Blood pooling and pins and needles in my feet when I walk. Don't even think about exercising past walking, it's impossible. I used to work out an hour a day 4 times a week and now walking up one flight of stairs makes my heart pound and I can't breathe. Can't take even just warm showers anymore or I will pass out. Heat rashes from being in the sun for 10 minutes.

Digestive issues: Honestly too many to name but: constant bloating, extreme nausea, constipation, slow motility, lack of appetite, just so much cramping and pain. I lost 18 pounds from Long COVID, as someone who was already considered underweight their entire life, and almost had to get a shunt put into my chest to deliver nutrients because I was nearly completely unable to eat. For the first 6 months of Long COVID, if I could manage 600 calories a day, that was a good day.

Histamine intolerance: Oh boy. My worst symptoms, I don't even know where to start with it. If you know Mast Cell Activation Syndrome (MCAS) it's very similar. I can only eat 19 foods. If i eat a single bite of something not on that list, it's 48 hours of absolute hell. Coughing, migraines, itchy eyes, such extreme nausea I cannot even describe it, panic/feeling of doom, racing heart rate, derealization, rash, uncontrollable muscle tremors. I only learned about histamine intolerance 5 months into having Long COVID so before that, I was experiencing these symptoms nearly every single day. Terrifying isn't even a strong enough word to describe how it felt to experience all this and have no idea what it was, how to stop it, or if it would ever stop. Really dark times.

Neurological issues: More of that derealization. Inability to concentrate. Anxiety. OCD-like symptoms such as thoughts getting "stuck" in my head, repeating 24/7 completely unable to stop them, genuinely felt like my brain had cracked open and I had lost my mind. Constant dizziness like I'm on a boat.

Sleep issues: I sleep like garbage. I have insomnia, I wake up dozens of times every night and every single time I sleep I have intensely vivid dreams. I can't sleep longer than 7 hours total no matter how exhausted I am. It is exhausting. I'm exhausted, I'm so so tired.

And finally. Just. Really intense suicidal ideation. My body, my health, my entire life has been stolen from me because someone else decided my life was worth less to them than wearing a mask or staying home if they feel sick. Before I got Long COVID, I was preparing to go to South Korea to teach English, then on to a PhD in neurolinguistics, I was supposed to meet my long distance partner and had already booked plane tickets when I got sick. All of that has been destroyed.

Most of us with Long COVID are stuck in a cycle of being extremely sick, then if you're lucky you'll slowly get better over months, just to get reinfected and go right back where you started or worse. Honestly, I'm not scared of dying from COVID. I'm scared of living for a long time, suffering from Long COVID the entire time. This isn't living.

I don't know how to end this now. I'm still fighting, I'm trying experimental treatments, I'm not giving up yet. I hope everyone reading this stays healthy and well.

#long covid #covid 19 #covid isn't over #pandemic

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pellucid-constellations · 11 months ago

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Of Oblivious Minds (2)

Pairing: Azriel x Reader

Summary: You're positive Azriel is in love with Elain. It seems so obvious. But Cassian is laughing at you and suddenly nothing makes quite so much sense anymore.

Word count: 3k

Warnings: Angst!! More pining and yearning

a/n: Here is part two! I love writing this little series :) There will definitely be more! let me know what you think ♡♡

Part 1, Part 3

Sometimes you hated being a scholar.

There were plenty of upsides to having such a cushy job, especially when your employer was the high lord himself. You got paid generously, got free access to the best libraries, and never had to pay rent. Millions of fae would kill to have your position.

But as Cassian punched you in the ribs—for the third time—you found yourself questioning your role within the night court’s inner circle.

“Okay,” you breathed out, hunching over with a hand cradling your side. “Okay, please, Cass. Can we take a break?”

Unfortunately, Cassian didn’t appreciate quitters. So, your feet were abruptly swept from under you and your back made contact with the floor. With a soft oof, the wind was knocked from your lungs.

“C’mon, y/n, you’re better than that. I know you are.”

You responded with a wheeze, blinking into the pale sun.

This morning had been rough.

You’d been having some trouble sleeping, but that wasn’t necessarily unusual. Being alive for so long meant you had seen quite a few things, so nightmares came and went with the tide. You were going through a rough patch with them at the moment, and the lack of sleep was starting to catch up with you.

“You planning on laying there for the rest of the day?” Cassian asked, his large silhouette coming to block the light.

You squinted up at him. “Maybe.”

“Yeah, not happening.”

You fought back a whine as the Illyrian pulled you up by your shoulders and steadied you. He nodded, giving you a moment to ready yourself back into position, and then bent his knees. Gods, you were going to be so sore later.

It didn’t take long for you to end up on the floor again, this time on your stomach. Your chin cracked against the padded ring, your teeth snapping together at the impact. The sound made your brain vibrate as you rolled onto your side and held your temple.

Cassian crouched down to the floor beside you and you could make out his worried brow amidst the shakiness of your vision.

“What’s going on with you?” He brought his hand up to brush against your already bruising jaw. “We’ve been working on that move for weeks. You had it a few days ago.”

You breathed through your nose and tried not to groan at the ache rolling through your body. “I think I’m just tired. I haven’t been sleeping very well.”

At that, Cassian plopped down to a seat, keeping a hand at your elbow as you brought your own body up to mirror his.

“You want to talk about it?” he questioned.

“There isn’t much to say. I can’t remember them this time. It’s kind of strange—usually I remember them too much and that’s what makes it worse.”

Cassian hummed in contemplation. He was always the one you went to the morning after a sleepless night. Cassian would listen as you talked through your nightmares, and you would do the same for him. He was a logical pillar in your life.

But it was always Azriel you went to in the midst of them. You never talked about what you saw and he never asked. But it was always Azriel in the middle of the night. His shadows were a comfort in the pitch black and he was always quick to wrap his wings around you when it became too hard to breathe.

You hadn’t gone to him these last few times.

The fact that you couldn’t remember your dreams was an unfortunate factor. Because if you knew what was causing you to wake up in a cold sweat every night, at least then you could talk about it. Or take a moment to rationalize.

There was no rationalizing when the only thing you had to go off of was fear and hurt.

“What does Azriel think?” Cassian asked after a small lapse in silence.

“What do you mean?”

“Well, when you go to his room at night. What does he have to say about you not remembering?”

You scoffed. And then scoffed again. “What? I don’t know what you’re talking about, I barely do that.”

Cassian stared at you with a blank expression. “So we’re still doing that then. Got it.” He heaved himself up from the ground and then yanked you up alongside him.

“Still doing what?” you asked, trailing behind him as he reached for his canteen. He didn’t answer you, favoring the long gulps of water he was taking. You waited for him to finish and then asked again. He chose to unwrap his knuckles instead. “Cassian.”

The man sighed. “Nothing, y/n. It’s just… It wasn’t a secret that you would go to his room after you had a rough night. Why do you think I never dragged you out here those mornings?” You cringed at his words. He shook his head. “There’s nothing wrong with that. Why do you hide it?”

You didn’t have a good reason—well, you didn’t used to. You’d always sneak out of his room after the sun rose and never bring it up again. And there was never a solid explanation for why you evaded the topic. You knew Azriel would never hold it against you and you weren’t embarrassed for others to know that you sought out comfort in a friend. It just seemed like something you should keep to yourself.

Now, though—now there was a good reason to wipe your actions from memory. To pretend they never happened and to never repeat them.

“Cassian, Elain is my friend. Even if I did that in the past—in a friendly way—it would be wrong now.”

A muscle in Cassian’s jaw twitched. “Right. Have you ever actually talked to Elain about her feelings?”

“I don’t need to.” You reached down for your own water, ignoring the twinge in your side and the pulsing in your head. “She never stops talking about him. And they’re always together. I wouldn’t be surprised if they were already seeing each other.”

“Who’s seeing each other?”

The cool tone of Azriel’s voice washed over you and you whipped around to find him standing at the foot of the training ring, blades in hand.

A nervous laugh fell from your lips and you fought the urge to slap your hand over your mouth. “Um, no one, just some friends I know.”

“Who?” he asked again.

“Oh, you don’t know them. Old friends.”

The Shadowsinger raised a brow, sending Cassian a fleeting look. “I thought I knew all of your friends.”

“You don’t. I know way more people than you. Even though you're older than me. Not by that much, though. Have you talked to Elain lately?” Words were spewing from your mouth in the worst combinations. You were never nervous around Azriel. What in the cauldron was wrong with you?

Azriel’s raised brow turned into a furrowed one and he blinked, assessing your face with a scrutinizing gaze. “Do you have a concussion?” He turned the Cassian, expression going from confused to provoked. “Did you give her a concussion?”

“Honestly, maybe.”

“I don’t have a concussion,” you rushed out, cutting off Cassian’s admission. “I was just leaving though. I’m tired. You guys can fight each other.”

There was so much sudden pent-up energy inside of you that you had no intention of sleeping, but just seeing Azriel made you feel like you were intruding on something. Which was absurd. Azriel was your friend and had been your friend for centuries. Just because he loved Elain didn’t mean you had to avoid him.

But this energy had to come from somewhere, and that somewhere was telling you to avoid him like the Illyrian flu.

Making a break for it, you freed yourself from the training ring and attempted to skate past Azriel with a quick side smile, but he apparently had other plans. He caught your wrist as you walked past, glancing up at a “preoccupied” Cassian before turning to you with his wing out, giving the illusion of a private conversation.

“You’re not sleeping well?” he asked, voice low.

You warped your smile into one that met both sides of your mouth. “I’m okay.”

Shadows crept over his shoulders and along his ears. His expression shifted and pinched and then returned neutral. “You know you can come to me if you need it.”

“I’m okay, Az. Really.”

“Would you tell me if you weren’t?”

Maybe before.

“I’m a paper pusher, Az. I’m not out in the throes of battle,” you jested, scrunching your nose as you smiled up at him. “Nothing is that serious for me.”

A lie. Something was that serious—serious enough to keep you up at night for the past week—but you couldn’t figure out what it was.

“That is not what I asked,” he countered, sliding his hand up from your wrist to turn your chin. “You need to ice your jaw. Cassian shouldn’t be so rough with you.”

“I’m okay,” you said again, words a pathetic repetition because your heart was beating so fast now and you needed to leave. Something was pulling at your chest and you needed to leave.

“As you’ve said,” Azriel muttered, his fingers brushing down along the column of your throat. When his eyes flickered up and met your own, something inside of you lost its alignment.

You looked away before the feeling could return. Everything righted itself. You took a wobbly step back.

“Have a good training session.”

You turned on your heel and stalked away, feeling equal parts the betrayer and the betrayed.

“You mean that girl off-continent? The one from a century ago?”

Cassian hummed. “Yeah, her. What I wouldn’t give for a visit from her.”

“You’re a pig,” Mor replied, a scoff sharp on her lips.

“She didn’t think so.”

You were eavesdropping. You didn’t like to, but somehow, in the time you’d spent in the inner circle, you’d picked up the habit. Oops.

Technically, you weren’t really eavesdropping. You had been in the room first. It wasn’t your fault Cassian and Mor decided to speak very loudly with only a few shelves separating you. If they wanted privacy they should have checked the area.

“Is it that hard for you to get laid? You have to search off-continent?”

Cassian’s responding laugh was almost defensive. “I’m sure you’d love to know about my sex life.”

“I really wouldn’t, actually. You brought it up.” Mor paused. You heard her shift on the lounge chair. “I am, however, interested in Azriel’s.”

“Aren’t we all,” Cassian droned. “Pretty obvious that he doesn't have one at the moment. Hasn’t had one in a while.”

You felt your neck jolt at the reveal of that information. Azriel always kept his partners discrete, but you’d always known he’d had them. Many of them. You had no idea who they were or where he met them, but you would hear the girls occasionally... smell their perfume on a few rare nights.

“You think? This whole time?” Mor asked, curiosity raising her voice an octave.

“Mor, I think the sight of other females makes him want to vomit.”

The book in your lap was all but obsolete.

“Don’t be so dramatic.”

Cassian tsked. “I’m not. He’s told me.”

“I suppose that’s what having a mate does to a person.”

Your fingers became abnormally cold, the center of your chest caving slightly.

Azriel had a mate? No, he would have told you.

He would have told you.

Mor’s sweet voice slammed against your ears, harsh despite its nature. “Do you think he’ll tell her soon?”

Cassian’s reply had you standing on shaking knees. “Hope so. He’s so in love with her it's suffocating. You should see when—”

You were out of the room in a wisp, sliding out the small back door. The book you’d been reading was still clutched in your frozen grip and you held it against your chest as breathing became impossible. With a hand pressed to the wall and your head hung low, you sucked in air, greedy for some type of reprieve.

You were happy for him. You were so, so happy for him.

Right?

The book fell from your grip, clattering to the floor. The pages collapsed in on themselves as it fell face down, and you listened to the paper crumple as your throat closed. Both hands now pressed to the cold wall. Why were you freezing?

This made sense. It made sense.

Of course Azriel had a mate and of course it was… Elain?

No, it couldn’t be Elain. Elain was Lucien’s mate.

Now you were confused as well as consumed. Your body was left aching from training and your mind was in a frenzy and you couldn’t even understand why you were reacting the way you were.

It was completely plausible that Azriel had a mate and didn’t tell anyone about it. He was a private male who kept his lovers to himself, so of course he would keep his mate to himself as well. But he did tell someone about it. He told Cassian. And Mor knew.

Your fingernails dug into stone.

Azriel didn’t love you.

The thought came on so suddenly that you almost looked over your shoulder. It was as if the words had been whispered in your ear by some cruel, vicious wind.

You had never cared if Azriel loved you before, because you knew that he did love you. Like a sister. You were Azriel’s family and he was yours.

But as the thought of Azriel having a mate invaded your mind once more, your shaky legs propelled you forward, running from the creased book and the hallway that contained all of the worst things.

You ran until you couldn't, until your toes hit the edge of the balcony on the far side of the house and the cool air of winter hit your cheeks. You had been so cold inside, but somehow the breeze felt even colder across your skin.

“Y/n?”

You gasped, whipping around and gripping the railing as it pressed into your spine. You couldn’t formulate words as Azriel stood before you. His hands raised up to his waist, reaching for you as he took in the way your chest heaved.

“What’s happened? What’s wrong?” he rushed.

You only shook your head, squeezing your eyes shut. Embarrassment and confusion and a twisted sort of fear coursed through you. You couldn't look at him, afraid you would somehow see the bond connected to his chest—somehow notice things about him you hadn’t before. Maybe another shade of hazel in his eyes or a softness to his lips that you had never looked for.

As you considered it now, it was obvious that you’d never let yourself look.

Azriel was never supposed to be yours.

“Talk to me, angel.” Azriel’s sweet whisper brushed against your skin. He was so close to you. You could feel him, but you refused to look.

To see how everything had changed.

“Let me fix it.”

You heard the rush of wind from his wings as he expanded them outwards, followed closely behind by the whirling of his shadows, and it all clicked then.

The images came quickly, dissipating just as fast. But they did their job, sending heavy, hot tears past the tight scrunch of your eyelids.

Azriel with Elain. Azriel with Mor. Azriel with random, faceless women.

Him, in every iteration, with everyone that wasn’t you.

That’s what had kept you up—the dreams plaguing your every resting moment. And you realized then that nothing had really changed at all. That you’d been in love with Azriel for longer than you’d been in love with anything.

Your jaw trembled, your body rejecting the anguish that swept through you. Wind softly flowed from the west, swaying your skirts with a gentleness that made your breath shudder. That kind of gentleness was impossible. The world felt so cruel.

“Y/n, tell me what happened. Should I get someone else?” Azriel pleaded. “Should I get Rhys?”

Rhys could knock you out, and that would surely be a relief. You felt paralyzed by this overwhelming array of devastation. But Rhys would also have access to your thoughts.

You shook your head. “No,” you said, but the word was lost in the wind. Azriel seemed to hear it anyway. “No, I want—I need to—go to sleep.”

“You need to go to sleep?” He touched you now, something he seemed to have been avoiding. His hands came to rest behind your neck, thumbs at your jaw, and you pried your eyes open at the contact. You’d never seen the shadowsinger look so ruined, his hair askew, his eyes wild and panicked. “That doesn’t make any sense.”

His expression was beseeching you for something you couldn’t give him. You hiccuped your next words out.

“I’m—’m tired.”

You wished you’d stayed oblivious. That you had never become privy to the depth of your feelings.

This pain was immeasurable.

#azriel x reader #azriel acotar #azriel x you #azriel shadowsinger #acotar fanfiction #azriel #azriel angst #azriel fanfic

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beenbaanbuun · 15 days ago

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guard dog w/ jeong yunho

pt2

you live in a shitty apartment in a shitty neighbourhood surrounded by shitty neighbours who seem to make it their life’s work to make your life a living hell

the guy that lives across from you is an aspiring dj, emphasis on aspiring

unfortunately with him working the late shift at his supermarket job, it means he likes to practice late into the night

after the first 5 noice complaints, you just gave up trying to get a decent night sleep; part of you thinks he carried on just as one giant ‘fuck you’

the family that live upstairs aren’t great either

the son—timmy? tommy? who cares—thinks it’s fun to sit on the stairs with his buddies and smoke anything they can get their hands on

your air freshener is the only thing keeping you from losing your mind at them! well, that and the fact that quite frankly him and his friends terrify you

they watch you carefully as you make your way down the stairs, pushing through their congregation with a tight lipped, overly polite smile on your face

usually they don’t say a word, giving you little more acknowledgment than a hum as you thank them for barely making enough room for you to push through them

they make you nervous, you can’t deny that, and half of you thinks that’s the whole point

it’s like it’s some sort of strange power play to keep you from complaining to his parents, or worse, the landlord

not exactly a threat, but not not one

maybe it’s those nerves that made you open up to your friend one day

you’d met up with him at a local cafe, offering to pay for his coffee if he gave you half of the sandwich he’d brought with him

“they just spook me a little, y’know?” you mumble as a few crumbs topple over your bottom lip and onto your chin, “it’s a group of 10 over-grown teenage boys; it��s fucking intimidating!”

mingi just nods along, a small frown on his face as he listens to you complain about your living conditions for what seems like the millionth time

he gets it; moving is expensive, especially in the city, and you need to stay relatively close to where you work since you don’t have a car

it doesn’t mean he has to like it, though

“what about a guar—”

“a guard dog?” you cut him off, “mingi, we’ve had this conversation so many times before!”

it’s the truth; it seems like every single time you see him he brings up the same suggestion; scary dog privileges can get you very far in life according to you friend

“too mentally ill to look after another life, sure,” he reiterates the same point you make every single time, “but what about a hybrid?”

again, it feels like you’re in a constant loop of deja vu, destined to relive this conversation over and over again until you can finally afford to move out of that shit hole

“i can’t aff—”

“—afford a hybrid, yeah i know,” you roll your eyes as he finishes your sentence; jesus, he’s annoying, “but what if i told you i knew a guy?”

it sounds suspicious, but you won’t lie and say you’re not a little curious

perhaps you’re just a little too nosy to not lean in a little closer with a brow cocked a question of ‘who?’ primed on your tongue

“can’t say,” is all mingi says, “he doesn’t like people poking around in his business.”

he says it so nonchalantly as if he’s not your best friend who’s just announced that he knows someone who is almost definitely into some dodgy shit

you’d be a bad friend if you didn’t ask at least a few questions, but before you can even open your mouth, mingi beats you to it

“£200 will get you a hybrid though,” you almost choke on the sandwich at the price; this is some seriously dodgy guy if he’s selling hybrids for that little, “£300 if you start laying down preferences.”

“mingi,” you begin, about to beg him to get out of whatever business he’s getting himself involved in

“i’m assuming it’s a no?” he raises an eyebrow; you don’t even have to nod for him to understand your answer

he concedes, throwing his hands up in surrender like he always does whenever you have this conversation

still, the smirk on his face as the conversation moves onto something else doesn’t fill you with the upmost confidence

a week passes by rather quickly; you work, you come home, you go about your evenings as normal, you sleep

nothing seems any different, and why would it? nothing about your life ever really changes without some sort of built up or expectation

and then your doorbell rings

you assume it’s just your neighbour again, around at yours to ask you some sort of stupid question that could easy be solved using a single braincell and google

you trudge to the door with a sour look on your face and a bitterness already growing on your tongue, just to swing it open to see… not your neighbour

not anyone you recognise for that matter

your gaze travels up from the chest you stand eye-to-eye with, traipsing lazily over the defined muscles on his neck before reaching his face

a jaw set in stone, two steely brown eyes and a pair of jet black dog ears are what immediately catch your attention

that and the fact that he’s very handsome; so much so that it takes everything in you not to stare at him with your mouth wide open

“are you going to let me in?” he says as if the hybrid’s arrival at your door was at all expected by you

“who are you?” is the only response you can

“your guard dog,” he replies, and just like that everything clicks into place

mingi, that bastard

“but i didn’t pay for a guard dog,” you argue, hoping that it’ll be enough to make him go back to whatever creep it is that mingi has gotten involved with

“well, someone did.”

he looks bored as he uses a hand to push you aside and steps past you into your tiny apartment, as if this is just another day for him

maybe it is; you don’t know much about hybrids, but you’ve heard enough stories to know just how many of them go through life without a permanent home

they’re tossed from pillar to post as if they’re not conscious beings with minds and lives of their own

it’s sad, the fact that they can be so easily tossed aside by so many people

it’s even sadder to find yourself relating to that feeling

you shut the door, twisting the lock with a finality that you’re not sure you understand

“what’s your name?” you ask as you turn to face him

“yunho,” he sighs

it’s a pretty name, you think to yourself

one that you wouldn’t mind saying over and over again for the… foreseeable future…

seriously, fuck song mingi

“well i’m—”

“i know your name, puppy,” your mouth snaps shut at the authority that laces itself into his words, “it’s all i’ve heard for the past few days.”

you zip your mouth shut, something in your brain warning you not to speak out of turn

something in your brain seems to forget that this is your own home; surely you can speak whenever you want to

“i wasn’t sure what to expect, but you seem to fit the bill,” dark pupils land on your body, dancing up and down your form before finally meeting your eyes, “a pretty thing like you in a town like this? i’m shocked you’re still in one piece.”

“how dare you, i—”

“where am i sleeping?” he cuts you off like your complaints are little more than the stubborn words of a child

it irritates you to no end, and yet you can’t find the words to fight back

there’s just something in his eyes that has you convinced that maybe you’re not the one in charge here

“the couch,” you point to the ratty leather thing, feeling a slight twinge of guilt that it’s the only thing you have to offer

he takes a glance at at for just a second or two before shaking his head

“no,” he replies, “you have a double bed, right?”

“a double—” your eyes go wide, “you’re not sleeping in my bed!”

“yes, i am,” he insists, condescending and annoying. you hate him already, “because i’m certainly not sleeping on that thing, puppy.”

it doesn’t go unnoticed that he’s yet to use your name, instead sticking to that godforsaken nickname

if you thought it would make a difference, you might say something about it, but the stubborn arsehole has already shown enough of himself to make you understand that it would do very little

“the floor is available,” you spit, venemously

“and yet it tempts me even less than the sofa,” he smiles sarcastically and it boils your blood, “you’re just gonna have to get used to sharing.”

he takes a few paces forward until you’re having to crane your neck to look him in the eyes

you can practically feel his breath dancing across your cheeks as he lets out a low chuckle, a darkness washing over his face as he studies you

“you’re gonna have to get used to a lot of things now that i’m here,” warmth spreads across your cheek as his palm moves to cup it, “but that’s okay puppy, i can be patient while you learn.”

#ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez oneshot #ateez scenarios #ateez fic #yunho x reader #yandere ateez #yandere yunho

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nereidprinc3ss · 7 months ago

Text

andromeda | (dybmn? bonus)

a bonus vignette from spencer's POV. we find out how he really feels about reader. takes place the day before the argument at the bar.

note: this is not part six! takes place between parts four and five.

series masterlist

18+ warnings/tags: fem!reader, semi-graphic descriptions of sexual fantasies, some angst, you're not actually present, mention of alcohol, very vague discussions of murdery stuff bc he's supposed to be working, sassy spencer makes an appearance a/n: for all my angels who said they wanted a snippet of spencer's POV! i'm sorry if i'm overdoing it with this story or clogging the spencer tags, i'm just having a lot of fun! i hope you enjoy or that this may be clears some things up for you, pls lmk your thoughts:) ily!!!

Spencer is incessantly drumming the particle board table underneath his fingers.

The polymer veneer is one of his least favorite textures—he hates the grain of it and if he were to accidentally scratch the table with his nails he knows it would make the hair on the back of his neck stand up.

But of all the things he’s worried about, that ranks very low on the list.

He’s got a lot of mental tabs open all the time—and the tabs, he can deal with. It’s when he starts trying to operate with multiple windows that he begins to struggle. His brain, while it is a very fine tuned sort of computer, only has one monitor. Unfortunately, no human (except for the ones who’ve had their brain hemispheres surgically split) is immune to the inevitable pitfalls of multitasking. By dividing his mental energy between you and his job, he’s really fucking up his job. But he also thinks he really fucked up with you on that phone call the other night and for being as logical as he is he can’t seem to make that feel unimportant—even though he’s disgusted with himself for it because there are literally people dying.

Someone knocks on the open conference room door—he looks up, skimming his lips over his fist.

“What’s up?” he says too quickly upon seeing Emily’s mildly concerned face peering in on him.

Her mouth bridges into a sort of nonchalant frown and her brows kick up.

“Just… checking in. Haven’t heard from you all morning.”

“Yeah, the, uh—the geo-profile. I’m still… I’m still working it out.”

It’s not like he’s ever been phenomenal with his syntax in a social sense, but Spencer is certainly aware he’s doing even worse than usual right now.

“Okay. Uh… is there anything in particular stumping you, or…?”

“Nope. Just not enough information. But I’m—I’m going to keep trying.”

“Alright. Got your phone handy?”

It’s an odd question—of course he has his phone handy. He’s been doing this job longer than Emily has. How else would he communicate with the rest of the team? He bristles.

“Yeah. Why wouldn’t I?”

Emily shakes her head. She’s always been particularly good at reading his moods.

“You’re not under attack, Reid. I was just asking.”

Just as he’s about to say, why would you assume I’m not prepared for my job, he manages to swerve away and stifle the words with his fist. Instead he looks back down at his copy of the map and nods. In reality, he truly isn’t prepared for his job today. The reason he has his phone so close, fully charged and at top volume is because he’s worried he’ll miss a call from you.

Emily says something else, and he hums in response, and then she’s gone.

He shouldn’t be reading into your reticence this much. It’s not like you just sit by the phone all day, eagerly awaiting a call or text from him (like he does you). You have a life. You’re busy. And even if you are intentionally dodging his texts, he can’t entirely fault you for it. Spencer knows he’s clingy. He knows he’s overbearing. It’s part of why he panicked the other night and told you the whole humiliating story about Elle. Because he can’t ever just be cool and he felt the need to explain himself.

But the problem was, and is, that he doesn’t know how much longer he can go without saying those three words that fucked him over all those years ago.

So he’d danced around them. Applied them to someone else to try and avoid outright professing his all-consuming love for you over the phone. However you feel, Spencer has to assume he feels more. Spencer always has to assume he feels more because he usually does and it’s gotten him into trouble before. And now he’s pretty sure he was exactly right, as often is the case, because you didn’t tell him he was mistaken and you’d clammed up and you haven’t talked to him since and he’s not supposed to be reading into it this much.

Three victims killed and dumped within a 6 mile radius of the first victim plus one victim killed and dumped 23.8 miles away. That doesn’t make any fucking sense. Fuck this guy.

Spencer decides the problem is that he needs more caffeine.

Or possibly, if he were a different kind of man—copious amounts of alcohol.

So he stows his phone in a pocket and asks the first person he sees where the coffee machine is.

“Looks like you found it earlier,” the woman says, glancing pointedly down at his mostly empty mug. A playful smirk tugs at pinkish-brownish lips. She’s pretty, he realizes distantly. But he registers it the same way he’d take note of the model of a car, or the species of a bird, or the kind of shoes someone is wearing. It doesn’t actually interest him. It’s just part of processing his environment. “I can show you to it?”

He doesn’t have the heart or energy to explain that someone else brought him his cup earlier and he’s not flirting with her.

“If you could just point me in the right direction…?”

She laughs, short and dry, before she’s pointing down a hall.

“Kitchenette down there and to the left.”

“Thanks,” he mutters, already walking away without sparing her a second glance.

She’s the kind of woman he would have paid a lot more attention to before you came along. Not that he’d ever sleep with someone on the job (not since he was 25, anyway), but if he’d met her under any other circumstances he probably would have cared more about the way her pupils dilated and her eyes had widened slightly and she’d adjusted her posture and all the other small things people do when they’re attracted to someone else. 30 year old Spencer might have slept with her. 27 year old Spencer definitely would have slept with her. Current Spencer obsessively pines for a woman who is already his girlfriend and whom he has yet to sleep with at all far too much to think about other women like that.

But god, does he think about you like that.

His feet carry him down the dim, carpeted hallway but really it took barely a nudge and he’s thinking about you like that. At work. As he’s pouring himself coffee.

Spencer is confident in the fact that if anyone were to look at him right now, they’d never guess he’s running clips of you in his mind like a dirty supercut. Because he’s just pouring coffee. That’s one good thing about having all those tabs open all the time. He can toggle between them quickly. He has enough going on in the background that people look at him and all they can tell is that he’s thinking hard about lots of things. Some of them just happen to be the way you look when you’re naked on his bed, skin shining and glazed eyes sleepy, parted lips higher in color than usual and catching your breath. Some of them happen to be your hair brushing his stomach before he gathers it back for you. Some of them happen to be the way your thighs feel on either side of his face, or how you stretch around his fingers, or how you might feel when you stretch around his—

He hisses as hot coffee overflows from the mug and burns his hand.

Maybe he’s not as calm and collected as he thought.

But on top of all the other things he’s dealing with, having been so close to actually sleeping with you the other night is really fucking with his head. Even if he tells himself he wouldn't have done it, he knows himself better than that. He's too familiar with the effect you have on his judgement.

“Found it okay?”

Spencer looks down, surprised to see the woman from earlier sitting at her desk and watching him as he quickly passes by on his way back to the conference room. Her legs are crossed. She’s wearing a pencil skirt and a flouncy sort of blouse which seems impractical for working in an FBI field office. Maybe she notices his eye catching on her figure and misguidedly swivels her chair to give him a better look. But all he’s noticing is that it doesn’t look like yours. Now he’s picturing the curve of your hip dripping in silk after that first night at Rossi’s. How your waist and your stomach feel when he slides his hands over you. This woman—she might as well not even be here for all he’s actually seeing her.

“Yeah. Thanks again.”

Then he’s gone. Very briefly he acknowledges that he should feel sorry for so obviously brushing her off, but he doesn’t care even close to enough. He sets the coffee down on the table and rounds to the board where one of several maps is taped. On autopilot he draws lines between dump sites because one of the background tabs had deduced, while he was busy watching you like porn, that the distance between dump sites form the beginnings of the constellation Orion with some mathematical precision that’s too exacting to be coincidental. Orion’s Belt plus the most recent victim. Betelgeuse.

There are ten formally named stars that make up Orion. He marks all of them, but circles the transposed coordinates of Bellatrix, Saiph, Rigel and Meissa as the next most likely dump sites. Most probably it will be Orion’s head. They’re all in wooded areas. He calls Garcia. Garcia will call Emily, wherever she is. If the unsub sticks to pattern, which they always do, they have until midnight. It’s trite, really. Predictable, like people always are. Far too quickly he drinks half the cup of scalding coffee and retraces his steps through the office to find the bathroom.

It’s empty. The fluorescent lights hum. Spencer washes his hands with cold water and presses still wet fingers to his eyes. You’re waiting for him behind the black of his lids.

At first you would whine, and he would kiss you and you’d moan into his mouth and say his name when he opened you up as far as you would go. The air would be thick and warm with sex and vanilla perfume. Afterwards he’d take care of you and buy new sheets for his bed in your favorite color even if they didn’t match the walls and there would be nothing you’d want for that he couldn’t give to you ever again.

But.

That’s all contingent.

No matter how often he fantasizes about it, no matter in how much detail, and regardless of how often those details change wildly, one thing always stays the same.

The shape of your lips, swollen from kissing, bending around five or six vowels and only two consonants (it seems odd that there are only two consonants in I love you), sometimes before you start, sometimes in the middle or right at the peak—but always there, always moving in slow motion—and always silent.

In real life, they’d be aloud. It’s why his fantasies aren’t good enough. It’s why he can’t stop fantasizing about it. That’s the only part that really matters to him. The rest varies.

Not because having sex with you doesn’t matter—it matters so much he almost shatters his molars whenever he starts picturing it around other people. But because Spencer can’t have sex with you until you love him.

And he worries that you can’t love him until you have sex with him.

The last time he thought that about a person, it didn’t turn out well.

Maybe there is some magic number. Some amount of times you need to have sex with someone before they’ll love you back.

If there is, he knows for a fact it’s more than 32.

And he also knows, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that he cannot have loveless sex with you thirty three times while he waits to find out.

Not again.

But he's going to hold out as long as he possibly can until you say it because he so badly wants you to love him back. He'll let the weight of every ignored text, every reminder that you don't feel that way about him, hang from his shoulders until he collapses. And then he'll probably try to get back up.

Recycled paper towels scratch against his skin. He dries his face and hands and throws them crumpled into the trash can.

Outside the restroom, he pulls out his phone. For safety reasons and paranoia disguised as professionalism, you’re not his lock screen. It’s a photo of the Andromeda Galaxy. Whatever distance lies between you and Spencer, it could always be greater. No matter where you are in the world, you will always be the same 2.537 million light years away from Andromeda that he is.

It makes Orion feel much closer. You, too.

He sends you a text—the third message in a row.

The distance between blue bubbles feels like light years.

I’ll be home tomorrow. I miss you.

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fic #spencer reid x fem!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x self insert #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid angst #dr spencer reid #criminal minds #criminal minds fic #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds imagine

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mrsparrasblog · 7 months ago

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You're losing me pt.1 POLY 141 x F, Reader

TW: cheating, hurt no comfort, heavy angst, dubious consent, there will be a happy end in the last part dont worry

pt.2

The most important thing about a POLY relationship was trust, and you knew you could trust them with all your heart. Kyle was so devoted to you that the mere thought of sleeping with another woman made him sick to his stomach. John was so full of loyalty towards you that he would never do anything to destroy your trust. Simon would rather kill himself than hurt you, the man who didn’t even dare to sleep with you for the first three months, afraid of hurting you should cheat on you? Never. And Johnny, oh your Johnny, was the sweetest of all of them. He took you on all these dates, introduced you to his family, and not a day went by without a compliment, nor a return from deployment without a bouquet of your favorite flowers.

So why do you still feel jealous sometimes? John reassured you over and over again that it was normal for you to feel jealous. He reassured you that nothing was happening while they were on deployment; they had each other for the fun stuff but definitely no other females; that spot was reserved for you, and only you.

Still, when you saw the new medic, you were so close to puking your guts out. She was beautiful, so stunningly beautiful and cool. A field medic is more in understanding with their branch than you with your job as a teacher. "Don’t need a medic, love," Simon reassured you once again, "we love that you're soft and not so rugged of war." Kyle immediately asked if he should stop talking with her outside of missions, and there you had your safety and reassurance.

Two months you spent without them; their last tour took a bit longer than expected. When John surprisingly texted you yesterday that they were back, you couldn’t contain your happiness. Unfortunately, you didn’t have time yesterday evening since you worked late, but you were eager to surprise them today on base, even though they thought you were only coming Wednesday. But hey, they’d be happy about the surprise. So you baked their favorite goods, put yourself in a cute outfit, and went on base.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Johnny woke up with the worst headache of his life. He didn’t even remember drinking that much, only a few pints. Normally, he was more resistant. He felt a warm body around him and hair all over his face. He didn’t remember bringing you home yesterday, but yesterday was very blurry for him anyway. But he couldn’t complain; he missed you so much. When he nuzzled inside your neck, he smelled a different perfume than usual. It didn’t smell that great, but that's not something he’d say to you. Maybe he’d buy you a bottle of your favorite perfume as a present. The hair felt slightly different too, and your figure, did you change really so much in two months? When he opened his eyes and saw her, he couldn’t believe this. This must have been a dream, a bad dream. He looked down and noticed her lack of clothes under the blanket. "Fuck," he cursed out as he jumped out of bed, waking up the medic.

"What’s wrong, Johnny?"

"Don’t call me that; only she and SI can."

"You didn’t complain yesterday when I moaned it," the medic said with a teasing smile, grinning like a kid on Christmas.

"Don’t tell me we…" he pleaded.

"Of course, we did, Sweetheart."

Fuck, fuck, fuck, he screwed up. How could he do this? Where were the others? Why didn’t they stop him? How would they react? God, they'd kill me. No, she won’t. She will look at me with this disappointing glance.

As if the situation wasn’t worse enough, the guys walked in, looking at her standing completely naked. Kyle turned immediately around, but John looked knowing exactly like Ghost.

"You have 5 seconds to explain yourself, Soap," John grunted out, his hoarse voice sounding even deeper than usual.

"Oh, Johnny and I just had a bit of fun, Cap. Don’t worry; we can still go if you want to," she smiled brightly, her hand running over Price's clothed abs.

He pushed her away. "The only thing you're going to do is shower and leave."

She didn’t move. "It’s an order, not a suggestion, soldier," so she went to the shower, leaving the four men alone.

Kyle was on his way outside. "Where are you going, Sergeant?" Ghost asked.

"Telling my girlfriend that that bastard cheated on her. You don’t deserve her, not even a bit."

"Your girlfriend?"

"You won’t tell her a thing."

"You don’t get to decide that, Ghost," Kyle almost spat out.

"Ah, really, didn’t remember a thing."

Kyle went to him, grabbed him, and pushed him into a wall. "You fucking idiot, you ruined everything just because you couldn’t control your fucking cock."

"Stop."

"Aren’t you happy about it, Garrick? Now you have her alone like you always wanted?" Ghost asked, challenging the man who hurt his Johnny. He thought there must be a logical explanation for this; Johnny loved you; he wouldn’t do that.

"I said, fucking stop," John screamed at everyone.

You heard a lot of screams around the base. When you finally went to the room of Johnny and Kyle, you saw everyone there around, fighting. "So that’s what you do when I'm away to keep you in check," you hummed, chuckling a bit.

They looked at you in horror. Instead of the usual running towards you from Kyle, the picking you up from John, or the thousand kisses from Johnny, they just stood there in shock.

"Everything alright, boys?" you asked, letting the cupcakes rest on the table you baked for them.

"Love, look—" Kyle started but got stopped by Simon.

And from that moment, it went downhill. You noticed a flashy pink bra, definitely not your size, so far from your size that you were confused. "Whose is this?" you picked it up, and no words came out of them.

"No…" you already thought about the worst, but you wanted to give them a chance. Maybe it was a damn coincidence, Johnny's sister visiting or anything like that. The doubt went away in a second when she walked out of the bathroom, completely naked. "Oh, you're still together."

"Who of you?" you begged that they didn’t say all.

"I was. I'm so sorry," John said, his face looked apologetic, while the others looked surprised at their captain.

"It’s over," you muttered, trying not to cry to save you at least a bit of dignity. You were so stupid to trust them like that.

"Love, no, please," Kyle begged while Johnny and John were just silent.

"With all of us?" Ghost asked, wounded.

"You all knew it, and no one told me that John slept with that slag."

"EY!"

"Shut up," Ghost barked at the medic.

"I swear to you, I wanted to tell you," Kyle pleaded.

"Well, you didn’t, did you?"

"No, love, wait."

"It’s over," you asked out of the door, shutting them down from following you. "Let me the fuck alone."

"Let her go," John said to his men and they listened.

Back in the comfort of your own home, you allowed yourself to cry, holding your dog Winston till you felt in an unpeaceful slumber.

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chufflepop · 4 months ago

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The winners garden

This was inspired by my emerald rogue run (the old one), with my pidgeot whom I have named Victory after the run ended (or caught a pidgey in the safari and pretended it was her)

This'll be long because it affected me that much. I didn't expect to win this run- I thought I was a goner after Wallace. I swear this run felt like a movie sequence because my god it felt so climactic (to me)

Victory was a random pidgey I caught at before the first or second gym, and I was originally going to trade her off but I just felt like I lacked flying types. Eventually, I thought she was actually a really valuable member and kept her in. It also helped alot that the pidgeotite appeared the next time I got into the battle stop store, so it felt right keeping her around-

My team had a latios, thunderus, sylveon (who died but I managed to get him back because of the random lab encounter, thank god it was just a species curse), serperior, dracovish and mega pidgeot. Pidgeot with hurricane spam is so good I kept her around even more

It was a really solid team until I accidentally stumbled into a trainer battle while getting an item, and due to an unlucky crit, my latios goes down

At this point, I got mad because "AH, MY BEST TEAM MEMBER". He had a choice specs on and his job was to spam, but unfortunately, his psychic didn't kill the mega kanghaskan we encountered. It was unfortunate, I didn't level up because I thought I could avoid the trainer, but oh well

Caught a random alolan ninetales that did good aurora veil blizzard (after buying an ability patch) and I thought she'd be fine and for awhile, it was

Until I reached the champion. Wallace killed 3 of my team members, down went my serperior, my newly caught alolan ninetales, and my dracovish. And there was also an unskippable trainer when I moved on to the next route which killed my sylveon, leaving me with only my thunderus and my dear pidgeot

Remember the species clause I said earlier? That thing screwed me over when it only had 3 available pokemon (and worse, it was a water route so the surf point also had staryu, maybe I was just impatient and maybe another mon is in the surf point idk). I caught a starmie, a toxapex and a jellicent in that route. With the species clause active, I was handicapped to fight the REAL champion. I only had 5 pokemon instead of 6

The last poke stop. The trader was there, so I took a gamble with him and traded my starmie. And what came out of it felt right- It was a victini. At this point, I was giggling to myself like "I might win" because of victinis dex entry and such, about how it being with you is basically a guaranteed victory.

After I prepared my team to the best that I could and with some small confidence growing, I pressed on.

At this point, I only remember the pidgeot battle so I'm just trying to remember here and I'm probably wrong in some details

Red was the final champion and my victini took the lead. Victini died first, he was scarfed and spammed bolt strike until he MISSED. But it was still good enough, it was now a fair 4v4. Jellicent didn't have much, but he had will o wisp, which helped alot. He wasn't trained as well as the others so he was frailer than he was supposed to be, but he weakened one pokemon enough for thunderbolt range and died. 3v4 now

Thunderus tbolt, he goes down. Thunderus had a z crystal and it one shotted I forgot who immediately after.

It's now a 2v2

Terrakion. Easy enough for toxapex to take down (and spam recover)

2v1

Final pokemon was a giratina. Shadow force. Didnt want to switch out because tox was in good health and I wanted to knock off, but it critted and tox was lower than anticipated. Knock off did alright damage and I was sure it was a clear 2 hit ko if pidgeot lived. One outrage and tox was down

1v1.

My pidgeot, the pidgeot who's been with me since the start, the pidegot that I was going to trade away, the pidgeot that I doubted. From a little helpless pidgey to now facing Satan head on

She megas and hits her first hurricane but it doesn't kill and an outrage hits her and SHE BARELY LIVED. SHE WAS CLINGING FOR HER LIFE. AND THERE I KNEW, I KNEW I WON. ONE LAST HURRICANE AND DOWN GOES GIRATINA, AND MY SOLE SURVIVOR WON ME EVERYTHING!

IT FELT SO PERFECT. THE SPECIES CLAUSE, THE VICTINI, THE TOXAPEX, THE STRESS I BUILT, THE IMPORTANT POKEMON DYING JUST BEFORE RED, THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP TAKING DOWN POKEMON SATAN, IT DIDN'T LOOK LIKE MUCH VISUALLY AND SOME PEOPLE WOULD PROBABLY THINK IT'S CHILDISH, BUT I IMAGINED MY PIDGEOT ABSOLUTELY LOOKING COOL AND GOING HAM ON THAT FINAL BATTLE. THE FINAL BATTLE WAS COOL IN MY HEAD OKAY

After we won, I caught a female pidgey on the safari zone and named her Victory. It's the same pidgeot now pidgey that in my heart. And that's literally why I made this drawing. And also I significantly love pidgeot more now. I would also make an essay about my thought process when making this, but I think this tumblr blog is long enough (it was so corny ngl). Too bad I can’t bring her over but the newer game is fun too

I'm sorry this was long guys, I enjoyed talking about this way too much ahshsh

#artists on tumblr #digital art #digital fanart #art #pokemon #fanart #pidgeot #victini

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justporo · 11 months ago

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Astarion sees you're almost falling asleep and will drag you to bed now!

I would need this on like a daily basis. And I guess so do many of you - so let the vampire drag you to bed and GO! GET! SOME! SLEEP!

It was so late it could have been called early. Outside you could already hear the birds chirping, cheerfully greeting a new day. Which meant that it was more than high time to crawl into bed. And doubly so because you lived with a vampire who fared even worse with sunlight than you.

But you were still crouched over your desk and the papers there.

Your eyes were tired. You barely saw what you were working on anymore. And you knew you could get this done when you were fully rested and it would only take a matter of minutes. But you were so desperate to finish this.

Unfortunately, you had a tendency to be very determined (someone else usually called it stubborn but you always pretended you had gone deaf all of a sudden when that happened). But this tendency had brought you this far and probably saved your life more than once. And you wouldn't be bested by this piece of work!

But your head was slowly falling, your eyelids growing as heavy as lead.

And you only jumped back up when you heard that certain someone enter the room, being purposefully noisy to make you aware of it. You were grateful for that because if the vampire had snuck up on you, like he was fully capable of, it might have not ended well with you being this exhausted.

“Slacking off on the job, are we?” you heard his familiar teasing voice as he came closer. You felt his presence as he leaned on the table around you - basically caging you with his arms, sleeves rolled up to his elbows as usual. His lips were awfully close to your ear and the hairs on your neck stood on end as you didn't dare rip your eyes from your work.

“Don't you think this can wait, love?” he whispered now directly into your ear causing a hot and cold shiver to run down your spine.

But with this he had pushed the wrong button. Almost involuntarily you felt one of your eyebrows rise up and your lips forming a pout: “No, Astarion, I don't think it can wait.”

You turned your head around to face him and saw him smirk, making you even more annoyed at him. He leaned in closer, causing his chest to brush against your head now, his hands moved to cover yours.

“Do you really think a stack of papers can't wait more than your caring lover craving your calming touch?” he murmured with a pout that mirrored yours while his deft fingers freed your writing quill out of your angrily clenching fingers. You couldn't resist him long. His hands were used to open up more difficult things than your desperate grip on your writing utensils. Also his absolutely instrumentalized big red eyes he looked at you with were absolutely working their usual enchanting magic on you.

Not enough though for you to not make a snide remark about what was happening.

“Well, for starters the stack of papers doesn't talk back.”

“You think I'm funny, my love.”

“It also isn't as full of itself.”

A mockingly offended gasp while Astarion’s hands moved the papers out of your reach.

“My heart, you hurt me.”

“Ah see, it also doesn't guilt trip me.”

The vampire's hands wandered up over your arms to your shoulders. “I can't do right by you tonight, can I?”

“You could just let me keep working on my thing.”

A dramatic sigh and Astarion let his head fall forward and onto your shoulder. Then he let go of you and took a step back.

“Do you really want to keep working, dear?” he sounded sincere now and you suddenly felt true guilt as you looked at him. He stood there, arms crossed over his chest, eyes still awfully wide and shining.

But the urge to not keep business unfinished still had you in its claws.

After a few heartbeats you opened your lips to answer, but-

“Too bad, you're coming with me now, my love.” Astarion exclaimed and with rogue quickness grabbed your chair by the armrests to drag it away from the desk and turn it around to him. “You need your beauty sleep, I can't be seen walking around with a walking corpse!”

You squealed when you felt your body get yanked around so quickly while your tired brain was almost incapable of catching up. Thus you were almost confused when you had ended up on Astarion’s shoulder a moment later.

There was no energy left in your body to resist this infuriating man any longer so you just played the part of dead weight draped over his shoulder - since he had already coined you as such - and couldn't stop yourself from giggling.

“See, darling, I told you: you think I’m funny.”

“It's just sleep deprivation talking.”

“Ah, so you agree with that too.”

You resisted to answer him with something he would only twist around again to fit his agenda. Instead you just slapped his butt you had quite the delectable view of at the moment.

Astarion hissed and just slapped your behind in return. You only giggled more.

“I should have left you at your godsdamned desk, let you fall asleep right there to drool on the papers,” he murmured under his breath and ended it with something about how ungrateful you were while he threw open the bedroom door; your favourite drama queen.

Then he made quick work to get you off his shoulders with an exaggerated groan which you were sure wasn't fully acted.

As soon as your body hit your soft bed the last of your energy decided to evaporate into the aether. You were almost falling over if not for the vampire's quick reflexes catching your wrists.

With quick fingers and more snarky remarks you had no power to reply to anymore he undressed you to your underwear.

And with more overly dramatic groaning and a roll of his eyes since you provided absolutely no help did he turn you to lay down. He carefully placed your head on the pillows which you thanked him for with a dreamy sigh. Your eyes closed on your own. The blanket was thrown over you and more rustling told you that Astarion was quickly undressing as well.

When the mattress shifted under the vampire's weight as he got into bed next to you you barely even noticed it anymore.

With final efforts Astarion dragged you onto his chest. Your arms slung around him and your legs tangled with his automatically - you had done so hundreds if not thousands of times already.

“All this work just to get you where you belong,” Astarion whispered to you and clicked his tongue disapprovingly as he began rubbing lazy circles on your back. You only hummed contentedly as you felt your body relax fully into him and his touch.

Your last half-coherent thought as you drifted off to sleep was that, indeed, you had to agree with him on this one: you were right where you were supposed to be.

Taglist: @spacebarbarianweird @sunfire-ancunin @tragedybunny @dependsonthedream @tallymonster @magazzne @micropoe10 @aoirohi @my-bunny-prince @lumienyx @fayeriess @darlingxdragon @hereliesblackdragon @ayselluna @ajokeformur-ray @i-cant-get-into-my-other-account @rikuyrk06

#astarion #baldur's gate 3 #astarion ancunin #fanfiction #astarion x tav #bg3 spoilers #baldur's gate iii #baldurs gate #astarion x mc #astarion x oc #astarion x you #astarion x reader #bg3

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slytherinshua · 8 months ago

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YOUR WOUNDS WRAPPED WITH MY LOVE

genre. fluff. tiny bit of angst. mafia au. warnings. descriptions of a stab wound. blood. knives and guns. some profanity. kissing. they kinda argue but very mildly. i researched a little on how to treat wounds but pls don't expect it to be too accurate 😭. pairing. fiancé!jeno x reader. wc. 1.5k. request. no. a/n. so ever since the concept trailers this jeno has been the only thing on my mind I swear 😔 and nursing trope is one of my fav tropes ever so I joined the two together and was very delulu 👍

read part 2 here !

“Again?” You asked, less than happy at the sight of the tall man who stood against the doorframe, one hand clutching his side painfully. Lee Jeno always disappeared without warning on another mission only to return, usually injured, for you to patch him up. You had urged him to hire an actual medic for the job, but he refused, saying he didn’t trust anyone but you to get that close to him. That was a few years back when the occasions for it were still rare. You were alarmed at how often he seemed to be going out, and returning with increasingly worse injuries.

Your knowledge and skill with patching up wounds— dagger wounds, bruises and scrapes from physical altercations, hell, even gunshot wounds— was a lot better than years ago. You were confident in your ability to get your fiancé back to health, but you weren’t pleased with how often you had to. No matter how much you pleaded with him to let his body rest, he would more often than not, be out again just hours after you had tended to his bleeding body.

“I’m sorry.” He grumbled out. You would have been shocked by how hoarse his voice had become if this was the first time, but you were all too used to it. Your heart still clenched painfully seeing him in that state.

He could barely walk, blood dripping a little from where his hand pressed tightly to his left side, his face scrunched in pain as laboured irregular breaths left his mouth.

“Come here. Sit down. Tell me what happened.” You said quietly, already having gotten out the box of medical supplies. You were ready with the bottle of saline already, but it wasn’t anywhere near the top of Jeno’s worries. From the tone of your voice, he could tell you were mad at him. Or maybe it was mostly disappointment? A touch of worry, perhaps.

He made his way towards you, carefully limping towards the bed until he could gently lower himself onto it with his weight supported by the bedframe. He sat still as you gently took off his shirt, eyes assessing the dark red spot that stained the side of his stomach and up his ribcage. You glanced up to his face, and he met your eyes for half a second with a slow breath out.

“Knife. It’s not that deep, I stopped their hand before they could push it in very far.” He whispered, and then shut his eyes tightly when you dabbed a little at the wound with a soft wet cloth soaked in saline.

“Are you staying for long?” You asked, guarding your heart for what his answer would be. You loved Jeno— you loved him more than anything, and you tried to be as selfless as you could regarding him and his job. You never put up a fuss about having to patch him up, and you only ever gently tried to persuade him to be more careful. But it was hard, really hard. You couldn’t help but be hopeful that he might be able to stay for a bit longer with you. You hated how you only seemed to be seeing him to treat his wounds for the past month.

But it only reminded you of how he was by far the most selfless person you knew.

Countless threats had always been looking for Jeno’s weakness. And you happened to be the most vital one. You were unspeakably precious to him, and unfortunately, his rivals knew that. Of course, he did everything he could to protect you. You trusted him with your life. There was no one else who you would ever trust as much as him. And he had never lost your trust. You had never even had a scratch delivered to you. But the tradeoff of the protection that Jeno made sure you had was his own life being put at risk almost every day.

Every cut, stab, or bruise that littered his fair skin were marks of how determined he was to keep you safe. The least you could do was treat his body in return with your gentle hands, wiping away the blood, wrapping the wounds carefully, and stitching them up when needed.

Jeno answered your question with only a silent nod yes. Although relief filled your body that he wouldn’t be out again immediately, you still focused on the more important task at hand. You could enjoy his company once he wasn’t bleeding.

“Are they still after you?” You rummaged around in the box for the antibiotic ointment, dabbing a bit on your finger before leaning closer to apply it. “This’ll sting.” You muttered as a warning before dabbing the wound as carefully as you could. Jeno tensed up, his fingers bunching up the sheet of the bed as he did his best to stay still.

“Talk to me. It’ll help distract you.” You told him, pausing your application of the antibiotics to rest a hand on his shoulder, providing a small bit of comfort.

“They’re… They’re after you, not me. You know that.” He whispered out as you continued to treat the wound. “They can’t take me by themselves— they’d be fucking stupid to try. I made sure that they won’t bother us for at least a month. I’ll have to talk to Renjun and Donghyuck about our next course of action.” You hummed in understanding, grabbing the roll of gauze next.

“You need to rest your body, Jeno.” You said quietly. You could tell he was about to protest, so you interrupted quickly, “Doctor’s orders. Don’t pull anymore dumb shit.”

“It’s not dumb shit. It’s to protect you.” He argued back, clenching his jaw.

You sighed, starting to wrap the white cloth around his waist, “I know. But you said yourself that you have a month. At least for a week of that month, you need to rest and recover.”

Your fiancé seemed unsettled at the thought of a whole week of rest; a week of letting his guard down. It was almost unheard of for him. He knew from experience that as soon as he let himself relax, something unexpected would happen. But maybe you were right. Maybe a week of rest is what he needed.

You secured the wrap tightly, and mumbled out how you were all done. Jeno just stared at you while you cleaned up, soaking up the face he hadn’t gotten a chance to study for the past month. He felt incredibly guilty for how often he had been gone, and even more so for how often he had let you see him like this. He knew you hated it, but you never complained. He didn’t deserve you.

“I love you.” He spoke suddenly, interrupting the cold silence of the room. You shut the metal drawer slowly, back still turned to him as you let a small smile grow on your face. You hadn’t heard those words from him in a while. You turned back to sit down next to him again, your eyes staring into his.

“Won’t you say it back?” He whispered, reaching for your hand; your left hand, the one that adorned that diamond ring he had given you months prior. You let him pull you closer as his right hand enclosed over your left. His fingers felt a bit rough, but they were warm and comfortable. With his left hand on the back of your neck, he gently guided you forward until his lips closed over yours.

You could just barely taste the metallicness of blood from the slight cut to his bottom lip. But you didn’t focus on it, too absorbed in the gentleness of his kiss and how perfectly his lips felt against yours even after years had passed. He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours, his eyes still closed as he caught his breath.

You pecked his lips again, “I love you too. Always.”

He visibly relaxed at your words and dropped his head to your shoulder. You sighed, threading your fingers through the hair at the bottom of his neck, holding him closely. He shuddered quietly, and you frowned.

“Cold?” Your hand ran up and down his back slowly, feeling goosebumps rise from the chill. You traced one of the many scars that marked him, stopping at the dip of his scapula and muscle. You reached behind your back, feeling around along the mattress for a blanket. You caught hold of it and gently draped it around Jeno.

You smiled fondly at the way he nestled his head a little closer to the crook of your neck. From his breath, you figured he was already almost asleep. You didn’t want to disturb his sleep, but you knew the position would quickly get uncomfortable, so you shifted his head down to your chest and laid back until you hit the mattress. He didn’t protest at all, but shifted into a comfortable spot in his half-asleep state. With his head on your chest, his arm around your waist, and his legs tangled with yours, you found the new position to be much more promising for getting good sleep.

You pressed a kiss to his forehead and made sure the blanket covered his body before you closed your eyes as well.

↳ nct dream taglist: @kangtaehyunzzz,, @eternalgyu,,

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fashion-runways · 1 month ago

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hiii new pinned post again because the last one was outdated, there are links to the previous ones in that one as well. unfortunately there are no real updates re: my dad's wrongful imprisonment. at this point, they might be waiting until the statutes of limitations happen and it's over, i don't know. he has a therapist who's kind of expensive but we have to pay for and he has to go weekly because of all the trauma he has left from being in jail and from losing his job/not being able to find a new one because of this. his health got worse in there, too, so there are a lot of different doctors he has to go to, medications, etc. he's doing better every day, though, but that takes a lot of money of course.

i used to have a redbubble account that helped me get afloat alongside this blog, but it got suspended without notice and never got reinstated no matter how many things i've tried, so... that's another source of income that we lost. i used to make around 30/40 dollars a month there, now i make like 1/2 dollars on teepublic monthly, that's a huge difference. argentina's economy was always bad but it has been an absolute disaster since the current president got elected. prices rise literally on a weekly basis for everything from basic groceries to public transportation, power, water, phone bills, etc. my laptop's keyboard broke at some point and i almost had to buy a new one with money i literally didn't have, just going into negative numbers, but i managed to find a guy who replaced it for as cheap as he could. it was still expensive, but it was better than having to buy a new laptop entirely. would love to get a stable job, but that's always been impossible in this country, even more so lately. for updates on argentina in english, this person on twitter makes very good informative threads if you're interested.

on top of that my dog passed from cancer a few weeks ago, that was really expensive for us too, meds and appointments and special foods and everything that we could do to keep her happy until it was her time to go, and she was. i also started therapy around the time she was diagnosed (thank god) but my therapist had to rise her rates because of the economy mess i already mentioned, so... yeah. everything is exhausting and everything is expensive, and this is literally my only source of income. it's also the thing that i love doing the most and the thing that keeps me sane in all of this mess, so hey, never leaving. in fact, if anything ever happens to this website, you can always find me under fashion_runways on twitter or probably anywhere else. some of you guys mentioned not seeing my posts lately too, so if you can/want to, you can turn notifications on!

anyway yeah, all that to say i love this blog, i love fashion, and i love showing you guys new cool things and giving you guys ideas for art, or writing, or your own style, or just interesting stuff to look at. so if you can donate any money, that would help me more than you think. even a single dollar can change what i can do with my day sometimes, i swear. as usual, my kofi link: https://ko-fi.com/fashionrunways and my teepublic link: https://www.teepublic.com/user/dinah-lance. thanks for being around and sharing and reblogging my posts, thanks for asking questions about fashion, and of course thanks for helping to the ones who can, and thanks to the ones who can't too, i know how that feels like, don't worry about it. i love you 💖

#text posts #pinned post

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jinkiezzsstuff · 9 months ago

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Wing Grooming

lucifer x gn reader

warnings: i’ve written before but i don’t do it often so be aware, written on mobile, no mention of skin colour/bodytype/gender/hair type, no use of Y/N, slightly sexual but no real smut, cursing.

i love lucifer and i love the wings shtick <3 also i’ve worked with birds so im applying my knowledge of them here teehee

lemme know whatcha think this is only the second time homegirls written an xreader. also writing on tumblr sucks it deleted my shii so many times and i had to keep rewriting paragraphs

𝔓𝔞𝔯𝔱 𝔗𝔴𝔬 :)

—

Lucifer anxiously paced around his room in the hotel, unable to relax due to his wings, they were itchy. Normally he used various different objects to break the casting of new feathers, and remove those pesty pin feathers. He’s been so busy at the hotel recently, he completely neglected his feathers causing some unfortunate issues with his malt. After all he didn’t have only two he had a whole six, and it wasn’t easy to take care of all at once. In all honesty, Lucifer would rather cut them off before asking for assistance with preening them. Tossing his hat to the side his wings popped out unwillingly loose feathers flying around him. Curling the first set in front of him, he picked through to find the cause of the itch and discomfort. Chills ran up his back as his fingers gently searched through, they were sensitive from lack of care not to mention preening never failed to give him goose bumps. A knock sounded from his door making him jump, his wings puffing out around him. “Uh, ah, one moment.” He shouted in a sing songy voice, jumping to his feet from where he sat he hurried over eager to get back to preening.

Swining the door open you stood on the other side smiling with papers in your grasp. Keeping his wings hidden slightly behind him and the door he greeted you with a charming smile. "Hi luce, Charlie said these belonged to you something to do with the different rings?" Quirking your head to the side you observed the king with curiosity. He was visibly uncomfortable, fidgeting and shifting from side to side. "Are you alright?" He blew air out in a pft sound at you and stood a little straighter. "Just a little feather issues, you know how it can be..." Lucifer trailed looking off to the side trying hard to ignore the stinging itch that shot through one wing.

“Oh can I help in any way, if that’s not strange?” You ask innocently but Lucifer’s mind went immediately to the gutter with the thought of you tracing your hands down his back and his combing through feathers, it made him shiver with delight. Although his blush was evident and his demeanour dropped to a slightly more shy one, you remained waiting patiently for his answer. “It’s- uh, normally, i don’t let anybody touch them. Um, but you can! Of course..” He trailed switching between stretching himself up with confidence and shrinking down again with doubt, regardless of his apprehension he still stood aside opening the door wider for you to enter. “It’s just the preening process is all. Difficult to reach.” Lucifer muttered as you welcome yourself into his room. With a bright smile you reassured him that you would do as he asked and you’d rather help than have him be stuck with that icky discomfort.

Setting the paperwork down on a table, Lucifer closed the door and lingered next to a bench sofa whistling as his wings flapped him at random behind him. Turning to him he looked a little shy still not fully meeting your gaze. Unsure of what exactly to do but you gave him an assuring smile. “I don’t have to do this, I can get Charlie to?”

Lucifer laughed quickly shaking his head. “Ha ha, no that would make things worse actually, you’re much preferred! Just y’know it’s a lot to work on.” Plopping down on the bench he outstretched his wings behind him on full display for you, his heart pounding against his ribs. You felt a zap of emotion shoot through you at the admission that you were wanted by him for this job.

It wasn't a secret Charlie's dad woo'd you the moment he waltzed in the door, but your loyalty was with Charlie and you didn't want to disrespect her by eye fucking her divorced father while he's here to help. Although Charlie seemed pretty enthralled that her father was making an effort to spend time with her friends, even elbowing you and whispering that he seemed to particularly enjoy conversation with you.

After that it was harder to ignore the way you felt for the King, Charlie would constantly drop not so subtle hints that her dad took a liking to you and that caused your mind to wander and fantasize. From there on you got more confidence putting yourself in situations to catch him alone in conversation or help him with different tasks he had to complete. Beginning your work on his wings, you hummed quietly to yourself easily spotting several pin feathers coming in that needed to have the keratin shell taken off. Carefully you split the feathers away and massaged off the shells one by one listening to Lucifers pleasant hms, groans and sighs. He visibly slumped, and his body rested just barely against your thigh as you worked on the very top wing. “These look pretty cluttered hun, have you been struggling to care for them?” You didn’t even notice the pet name slip as you called everyone off handed pet names, but Lucifer did notice and it brought him a warmth he hadn’t felt in a very long time. Sweetly talking to him about his wings without judgement, combing them comfortingly, humming like an angel just to him. It felt as good as when his ex wife was still around caring for his wings. It’d been so long since someone was by his side caring for him like this.

Lucifer never responded properly to your question about upkeep only humming in a trance like state as you worked your way through the top set of wings "You're so good at this, sheesh, I wish you'd do this all the time." You blushed faltering slightly which Lucifer panicked about, tensing and opening his eyes. "Of course i'm only spit balling, heh, it's just so relaxing like a sauna!" Shaking your head you moved down to the last set of feathers not missing the way he shuddered with your touch. "It's alright i don't mind that you say that. It feels nice actually, to help you." Lucifer didn't say anything feeling suddenly heated as ever as if hell wasn't hot enough. The feathers closest to his hips were unsurprisingly the most sensitive and the touches although innocent felt suggestive to him. The King felt dirty for feeling a euphoric sense of pleasure ripple through his bodv and straight to his junk while you unknowly worked through his feathers. “You okay? Did I hurt you?" You asked noticing his breath picking up and his body stiffening. Lucifer grinned and turned to look at you you meeting his gaze and seeing just how dazed he truly was. "I'm just... well,"

It was like his throat closed as he looked back at you crouched down to get at the last row of feathers that were draped along the floor. The king swallowed snapping his head forward again. “Ahem, I’m sensitive, good, sensitive.” He had hoped you understood his insinuations. Which you had. Breathing in deeply you flattened your hand out spreading your fingers and combing through the feathers more methodically from the base of his wings and outward. That cause him to jump up standing straight, you followed in persuit, panicking that you crossed a big line. His wings twitched but he stayed staring forward rigid, you quickly walked around the bench calling to him softly. “Lucifer i am so sorry if i crossed the line, that, that was unacceptable i’m so sorry.” To which Lucifer spun to you, face red, grabbing your shoulders he smiled a somewhat embarrassed smile. “No no, that was completely fine, i just,” Lucifer pulled away tucking his hands away from you, again which was kind of upset you.

“I think if we continue that, type of grooming, I won’t be able to control myself.” Although still shy about his admission his eyes were half lidded and his smile sly. You felt fire explode in your stomach all innocence out the window as your mind settled on one thought. You were gonna bang your friends divorced dad.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer morningstar #lucifer magne #lucifer x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #hazbin hotel imagine #lucifer magne x reader #lucifer hazbin hotel

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itsjustrosee · 5 months ago

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NIGHTMARES Stiles Stilinski x Fem!reader

Context: Readers dad is best friends with Beacon Hills sheriff, aka, Stiles's dad, so when he needs to leave home for a work trip, he leaves reader to stay at Stiles's house. Enemies to lovers kinda, Stiles comforts reader after she gets a nightmare

Warnings: none, fluff, and like the tiniest bit of cursing

Wordcount: 1.7k

Your eyes fluttered open as you sat up quickly in your bed, a sharp gasp escaping your mouth as you did so. Your body felt hot and damp, sweat sticking your shirt to your back as you took several deep breaths in an attempt to slow your quickened heart rate.

Your hands trembled as one shot up to your temple, the other clenching the collar of your baggy shirt so tightly your knuckles turned white.

You squeezed your eyes shut for a moment as you let out a long and shaky exhale. Slowly, your grip on your shirt loosened as your mind began to rationalize with you. It was just another nightmare.

And clearly, a bad one at that, judging by your puffy lips and the tears that stained your cheeks.

Once you pushed back all of your covers, you moved your pillow and sat against the headboard of your bed. You brought your knees up to your chest and placed your head in your hands as you tried to calm yourself down.

Your nightmares had been getting worse and worse as of late, and regardless of them having become an almost nightly occurrence for you, they never got any easier to deal with.

You'd been getting nightmares ever since you were little and regardless of how many doctors your dad had taken you to, none have been able to find a cure for your issue.

Due to your condition, your dad made sure that he was always home at night to comfort you whenever you woke up crying. Sure it was a promise he'd made to you when you were just a kid, but he'd always followed through on it. That is, until recently.

Your dad was out of town on a business trip for his new job. Though he tried his best to decline the offer because it meant leaving you home alone for a few nights, you reassured him you would be fine. But of course, that didn't exactly convince him enough.

That's why he insisted on having you stay at his best friend's house while he was away, just in case you needed anything.

Unfortunately, staying with his best friend meant staying with his son, who was none other than Stiles Stilinski.

For some reason, neither you nor Stiles ever got along. You don't know why things ended up that way, but they just did. You didn't like Stiles, he didn't like you. End of story.

Eventually, after sulking over your current situation, you lifted your head up to look at the guest room you had been staying in, the room was lit only barely by the moonlight that shined in through the window.

You began to rub your eyes as you sat up at the edge of your bed. There was no point now in trying to go back to sleep, you never could, right after waking up from a nightmare that is.

Slowly, you got up from the bed, placing both of your feet on the ice-cold floor, the temperature sending a shiver down your spine as you began walking out of your room and down the hallway.

Gradually, you made your way down the stairs and into the kitchen, grabbing a glass from the cupboard, bringing it to the sink, and filling it up with water. You brought the cup to your lips and took one long sip before placing it down on the counter.

But before you could even finish swallowing the liquid, a sudden noise behind you almost made you choke.

"Can't sleep?" A raspy voice from behind you asks, the noise making the hair on the back of your neck stand up straight.

Your body immediately tenses as you spin around, only for you to see Stiles standing a couple feet away from you in the kitchen. Your body relaxes as you see him and you let out a deep exhale.

"Relax princess," He says with a tired chuckle as walks towards you. "It's just me."

"Stiles you just scared the shit out of me," You reply with a huff as you study his features. He looked exhausted, you could tell by the way dark purple bags hung under his eyes. "What are you doing here?" You ask, your voice much softer than it was moments before after seeing his slightly disheveled state.

"I thought I heard crying coming from your room, and then I heard you walk downstairs. Just wanted to make sure you were okay," He says, his tone genuine and etched with concern that sounded all too foreign to you.

"Oh," You say, slightly dumbfounded by his words, and confused as to why he'd even care enough to bring it up to you, let alone check up on you about it. "I'm sorry that I woke you up," You say slowly as you look down, not knowing what else to say or do.

"No, it's fine. I was already awake," He says with a sigh. "I haven't really been able to fall asleep tonight anyways," He continues reassuringly, his reply definitely explaining the reason for his appearance.

You feel a pang of sympathy course through your body as you tilt your head to look up at him, watching him rub his eyes. You'd never seen him like this, so tired and out of it to the point where it hurt you to see him in such a state.

"So why are you down here?" He asks, his words snapping you back into reality, your eyes meeting his once more.

"I can never really fall back asleep after I get nightmares, so I thought I might just come down here for a bit and grab some water," You explain as you turn around to face the counter, your back now facing him.

You never really enjoyed discussing your nightmares with anyone, the same way no one likes talking about a breakup right after it happens. It just feels like reopening a wound you're so desperately trying to heal.

Suddenly, you feel his arms snake around your waist from behind as he pulls your back closer to his chest. "I'm sorry to hear about your nightmares," He explains, his voice low and husky yet surprisingly comforting as he leans his head down to your ear.

"It's-" You start but a gasp escapes your mouth, cutting you off as you feel his cold hands go under your shirt and wrap around your stomach. "It's okay. I'm used to it by now," You explain, your voice much quieter than it was a moment prior.

He lets out a small hum in reply before burying his head into the crook of your neck. "You're so warm," He mumbles into your skin, sounding as if he's a second away from falling asleep on you.

Another shiver shoots its way up your spine as you feel goosebumps all along your arms. Thoughts raced through your head as he continued to hold onto you.

You so desperately wanted to pull away from him because you knew that you should, that was what you were supposed to do. You were supposed to hate him. Yet you just couldn't seem to find the strength to do so. You wanted to hate it but you couldn't because you loved it. You loved being held by him, having him close, it was the best form of comfort you'd ever received from anyone.

You couldn't help but lean into his touch despite how cold he was. You felt his breathing slow against your neck and you could tell by the way his grip slowly grew less firm that he was beginning to fall asleep.

"Stiles," You murmur quietly, finally pulling yourself out of the trance his touch had sent you into. "You need to go to sleep. You sound exhausted," You say softly as you turn to face him again, his arms now wrapped around your lower back.

"No, no I'm fine," He mutters, though his body betrays him as he lets out a yawn.

"No, you're not," You say as you place your hand on his shoulder and bring your other hand to cup his cheek. "Just let me take you to bed, okay? You need sleep."

Stiles lets out a sigh as you feel him melt into your touch. "Fine," He grumbles reluctantly.

You smile at him softly, lightly tracing your thumb over his cheek before Stiles unwraps his arms from you and steps back, allowing you to push your back off the counter.

You take his hand in yours, your fingers intertwining with his as you lead him out of the kitchen and up the stairs, eventually making your way to his bedroom. You can't help but notice the numerous papers and books scattered across his room, making only parts of his floor visible.

Avoiding all the clutter that stands in your way, you carefully make your way to his bed. You pull the covers away and as you do so, Stiles climbs into bed.

After tucking him back in, you take a seat on the edge of his bed, both of your legs hanging off the side as you turn your head to look at him.

"Do you need anything before I leave?"

Lazily, Stiles turns his head to look at you. "You," He mumbles out slowly, placing his arm on your forearm. "Can- can you stay with me?" He asks quietly as he looks up at you with eyes that make your heart melt.

Slightly shocked by his offer yet slightly compelled to say yes because of how tired you've grown yourself, you nod your head.

Slowly, you get into bed next to him and get yourself under the covers, your back facing Stiles. Before you can even turn onto your back or roll to your side, he wraps his arms around your waist for the second time tonight.

He holds you close enough to him so that your back is flush against his chest and so that his head is resting on the crook of your neck.

Before tonight, he'd never held onto you like this before, but something about his touch seemed so familiar, so normal. It didn't feel odd to have him wrap his arms around you, to bury his head into your neck, or to let him hold you as he fell asleep. It felt good, more than good actually. It felt right.

Eventually, your eyelids grew heavy and your body began to relax against his. As his breathing slows, yours does as well, and soon enough, you find yourself falling into a blissful night's sleep, one without nightmares.

alright guys i actually did it! i uploaded! can yall believe it bc I cant 😭

I have been procrastinating and been in such a slump in literally everything. Like I haven't even been able to pick up my book and its been making me so mad. But I'm so happy that I finished this, even though it isn't the best thing ever, I'm relatively proud of it and I hope you guys like it!!

#teen wolf #teen wolf stiles #teenwolf #teen wolf fanfiction #teen wolf imagine #stiles stilinski #teen wolf stiles stilinski #stiles stilinski fanfiction #stiles x reader #stiles stilinski imagine #teen wolf x reader #x reader #teen wolf fanfic #stiles stilinski x reader

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luvyeni · 6 months ago

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THE DEMON IN THE KITCHEN • PARK SUNGHOON

pairing ‎⸝⸝⸝ demon!sunghoon wc. 5.2k+

𓄷 warnings... smut mdni. mentions of murder. sunghoon actually hates you. attempted murder ( twice ). reader likes some weird stuff. sexual tension. oral ( m. receiving ). rough sex. degradation.

nia's notes: this is probably a lot darker than the jake one , im sorry, but I hope you still enjoy 🖤 jay is next !!!

jake | lucifer masterlist | jay

having taken you away , I became a terrible monster, destroy and trample all …

with the burning fire of lucifer’s anger , swallow it up …

It had been about a month since you've found out about Jake; and the other demons who you haven't met that lived in your grandparents' old house — they hadn't introduced themselves yet ; so you and Jake spent your days alone in the house , never really leaving.

You mother had also came and visited to check on the house, see what you had gotten done; and if the house needed any renovations— unfortunately; your new friend had to stay away that week, which he dramatically claimed was the worse week in 50 years.

Besides watching TV shows and forcing Jake to take up baking; you two also had a lot of sex— like a lot there was not a time jake and you weren't on each other; his hips constantly rutting against yours while watching tv; his hands in your pants , giving you orgasm after orgasm before you went to sleep. Jake never slept though; he didn't need it, instead he watched over you while you sleep. At first yes you thought it was a bit creepy; but eventually you grew to like it; and soon you couldn't sleep unless he was right next to you, holding your hand.

You liked spending time with Jake; but you couldn't help but ask questions about the others; jake— who at first was jealous that you would literally ask about them when he's right there , put his pride to the side; you weren't only his— told you everything he could about his brothers ; telling you that he believed it will different and they'll all come out when they're ready. “be patient.” he would always said. “things will be different soon.”

“have you tried to eat?” you asked during one of your baking sessions. “of course , but, I don't need to eat, why would I? besides your grandmother was a terrible cook.” His face scrunched up in disgust. “I don't need to eat the brownies , but I believe you when you say they are good.” You frowned; which made him feel bad. “Fine, I'll eat one.” You smiled , cutting him a piece of freshly cooked brownie. “take a bite.”

You watched as he bit down on the brownie; his eyes lit up, moaning at the chocolate gooey treat. “it's so good.” he said. “We did a good job.” You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “we? the only thing you did was crack the eggs.” he shrugged. “That's something.” He said , your lips were in a thin line. “You got egg shells in the batter three times.”

“When you leave at night.” You said , laying in bed after a tense session. “where do you go?” this question had always loomed over your head. “there's a lot you don't know about this house; a lot that all of the owners don't know.” He said, “like what.” You sat up. “this house has many secret tunnels , the first owner who built this house was a bit of a maze lover , so he built a bunch of tunnels under ground.” He said. “And some of them have rooms?” you asked. “more like and entire underground house.” He said.

“How do i access it?” He sat up , holding your hand. “Do not go searching for it.” He said. “Why not?” You said. “Because the first owner wasn't just obbsesed with the labyrinth, but he was also a bit of a nutjob.” He said. “He also built secret tunnels that would lead to no where , but would trap you inside and you can't get out— ones so the ground could easily become unstable and you could get hurt.” He said. “Promise me you won't go looking, promise me.” you saw the concern look on his face , deciding not to stress him further. “Fine I won't go looking for the passage ways.” He looked into your eyes. “What can you tell if I'm lying or not?” He nodded. “Well smartass we can in fact tell when you're lying , that's how I know you're telling the truth.” he kissed your pouty lips. “It's best you don't go around getting hurt , if you die we can all feel it.”

Jake left after making sure you were in a deep sleep; locking up the house, something you always forgot to do , so he took it into his own hands to do so— turning the lights off , making his way through the tunnels back to where he'd wait until morning when he knew you were about to get up and start his day with you again.

you sat up in your bed , looking around the dark room. “Jake?” You rubbed your eyes , a blurry figure appearing in front of you. “Jake?” You squinted, “is that you?” He nodded , holding his hand out. “Come with me.” You held your hand out , getting out of bed , where he waited. He took a hold of your hands. “Follow me.”

“Where are you taking me?” You asked. “You wanted to see where we stayed right?” He asked. “Well I'm taking you.” You were confused. “You told me it was dangerous.” He looked back at you. “alone? yes, but you're with me me, would I ever put you in a dangerous love?” He wouldn't , you knew that he wouldn't. “No” he smiled. “Then keep walking.”

And that's what you did, following him down to the base of the house , where he guided you to a wall , pushing on the wall. “just go right through there.” He went first holding your hand , guiding you through the tunnels, lit with torches. “Just a little further love.”

You finally made it to the door , he pointed. “There.” He said. “open the door love.” You were about to reach for the door; turning back to him. “Go ahead.” As you reached for the door , you heard a yell— no a call of your name, it was jake; but how could that be if he was right there with you , and his mouth wasn't moving; in fact he was smiling. “Guess he's right on time.” The boy in front of you said. “what?” His mouth went flat. “Maybe next time.” He said. “Wake up.”

Your eyes suddenly shot open, it felt like all the air came rushing back to your lungs. “y/n!” His arms were wrapped around you. “huh?” Your head felt dizzy. “I told you to never come looking for these tunnels.” He held your shoulders , shaking you. “you promised you wouldn't come looking for these tunnels and you were sleepwalking.” He seemed so scared, you tried to explain but he wasn't having it. “Let's get you back to your room.” He said.

“You don't understand, you almost opened one that could've killed you.” He said , you sat on your bed. “But you're the one that guided me there , you told me you were gonna show me.” You said , he shook his head. “No I didn't , why would i guide you to one that was gonna kill you?” He said, he had a point. “But he looked just like you.”

“He did?” He asked. “Yeah , just like you.” He thought about it for just a split second , his eyes filling with rage. “What's wrong?” You reached for his hand , but he shot up to the floor. “I have to go.” He said. “Where?” You asked. “Jake where are you— just go back to sleep, I'll see you in the morning.” Was all he said , before leaving out— like hell you were going to sleep.

meanwhile Jake was on a mission; to find him, pushing the door open. “Sunghoon!” He shouted. “Where the fuck are you.” He was livid, walking throughout the house to find him. “sunghoon!”

“What?” The boy emerged from his own room. “what the hell is your problem?” Jake shoved the boy. “You could've kill her.” He bellowed , sunghoon nodded; the shrug barely phasing him. “you're right I could've but I didn't , did I?” He tilted his head to the side. “shes safe no? you got to her in time.” Jake couldn't believe his brother would be this heartless ; he wasn't always like this. “if you don't like her then leave her alone.” Jake said. “be like jay then , don't bother her.” He said.

“No.” he folded his arms, waking towards the boy. “I want her to take the necklace off , I want her to break the bond.” He said. “Leave this place , leave us alone.” He said, “I don't want to deal with her family anymore.” Jake knew he had his reasons; but this didn't mean he could do this to you. “she's not like her , I promise.” but sunghoon wasn't listening , already checked out. “maybe if you just got— i don't care, just cause your pussy whipped doesn't mean anything to me.” He said. “she's as good as dead in my eyes.”

You actually don't see Jake the next morning; which doesn't worry you at first; until he doesn't show up in the afternoon either— he told you he'd be back , and then the way he left abruptly. “Jake?” You called out , but got no answer. you got up , you couldn't wait for him today ; you needed to go into town.

“Hey it's you again.” You smiled seeing kai; the cute cashier standing at the register. “was starting to think you left.” He said , packing all your things up. “no , just don't really get out much.” He nodded. “understandable , driving into town all the time could be a handful.” He said. “Your grandmother never came into town , actually i haven't seen your cousins in a while.”

Cousin? you didn't have a cousin , you're mother didn't have any siblings. “Oh you're talking about jake.” Knowing what you knew about your grandmother she probably did use them as her slaves. “long black hair, kinda like a golden retriever?” He laughed , sitting your last bag in the cart. “Golden retriever?” He said. “No , absolutely not, his hair was short and black.” he could sense your confusion. “sunghoon I think his name was.” — sunghoon? jake said he didn't leave the house. “oh sunghoon , yeah.” you chuckled. “he went home to his family” he nodded. “figured.” he said. “he didn't talk much , and when he did, it was cold and sorta murderous.”

he walked you to your car; helping you put your groceries in the trunk. “thank you so much kai.” He nodded , smiling. “No problem.” He awkwardly shifted on the balls of his feet. “Is there something else?” You questioned. “Would you like the to get a drink sometime?” He said. “With you?” you asked. “Y-yeah , it's fine if you're busy though.” He stuttered. “No I'm not busy any time soon.” you said he smiled. “how about saturday?” you nodded. “sure.”

you bring all the bags inside. “Jake!” You shouted , closing the door. “Jake where are you?” You walked around looking for him. “I went to the grocery store.” You looked into the different rooms. “Jake?” nowhere , it was like he vanished, you walked into your room , the door to your closet open, making you smile. “Jake?” you open the door; empty — except it wasn't fully empty, there was a door. “huh?”

you moved the shoes , pushing the door; it opened. “Is this how he was leaving?” you asked yourself , shaking your head. “I'm gonna kill him again , if I find him.” you looked down the tunnel , another opening; wide open and you could see inside , a room. “seems safe.” You walked down the dimly lit tunnel , stopping once you reached the door. You pushed it open , walking it. “Jake?”

it was a room, a red and black room; the bed right in the mirror , it was almost a mirror to yours; Jake had nice taste— it was actually better than yours. “That's because it's not jake's room.” you heard an almost familiar, but unfamiliar voice. “and that's not how he enters your room.” He said , you were almost scared to turn around , you could feel the room become colder. “you're sunghoon.”

you turned around, and there he was, just like kai described— expect scarier cause he was right in front of you. “you kept calling for him and calling for him, it was annoying me.” he said. “I can hear you.” The door slammed behind you making you jump forward. “Your voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard.” he stepped closer to you. “i hate constantly hearing it in my head.” you stepped back. “then dont listen to it, I'm looking for Jake.” you turned to open the door; only for him to slam it again. “you think its that fucking easy?” He scoffed. “You are just as dumb as I thought you were.”

he didn't even know you, so why was he insulting you? “it was you.” You said. “You're the one who made me sleep walk— the one who tried to kill me.” he scoffed. “Trust me if I was trying to kill you, you'd be dead already.” He said. “sending me into a fucking tunnel to have my head caved in by rocks didn't seem like you were trying to be welcoming”

“Oh you have a mouth on you.” he said smiling. “Gonna make killing you so much better.” He said. “st-stay.” He interrupted “stay away? or what? you gonna call jakey?” he mockingly said. “I want you to take the necklace off,” he said. “Leave this house, hide it somewhere your parents won't find it.” he said. “If your mother doesn't find it , I won't have to slave for your disgusting family anymore, and when they die we'll get a new bond.” He said, “or I can kill you.” you can feel his breathing on your neck. “Jake can't stop me.” he whispered in your ear. “I can hear your heart racing.”

your breath hitched, he smirked. “Is the thought of me killing you turning you on,” he said. “are you really that sick of a person , not only do you fuck demons , you fuck demons who want to kill you as well. “ you felt his hand coming up to your back , pushing down on it. “st-st” you stuttered. “I bet if I fucked you right now you'd take it.” he growled. “Let little jakey walk in on me making you take my cock.” you gasp , his hands coming up to your hair yanking it back. “or I snap your neck now.”

he let you go; pulling the door open. “now get the fuck out; and think about what I said.” he said; you took off back down the tunnel entering back through the closet, slamming the hidden door closed , standing in your closet , trying to catch your breath— he said alot of stuff; what the fuck were you supposed to think about. “yn?” you heard jake's voice outside your door. “jake?” you pushed open the closet door. “where the hell have you been? I've called you 50 times.”

“I gave you a break, you seemed pretty scared,” he said. “Why are you coming out of the closet?” he asked, he saw the look in your eyes. “you found the passageway into sunghoons room?” you nodded. “and he was in there.” you nodded again. “I'm so sorry yn.” he stood up, hugging you. “I don't know why he's like that now , he actually wasn't that bad.” feeling your heartbeat. “What did he say?”

“N-nothing.” You said. “You're shaking like a leaf and your heartbeat is going a mile a minute, he must've said something.” you didn't know what to tell him , so you only told him what you thought he wanted to hear. “He said he'd kill me.”

telling him everything except the “moment” you both shared. “that's it?” He said. “that's all he told you?” you nodded. “Y-yeah.” you said, he sighed. “Why does he hate my family so much?” you asked, he rubbed his face with his hands. “your grandmother really fucked with him; sunghoon was always a little fucked in the head , but she made did something he swore to never do again , and he couldn't stop her , so before she made him do it again—” he stopped , continuing on again. “What did he do?” you asked. “he stopped her.” that's all he said , before stopping. “He killed her.”

That's all jake would tell you that day; and the next few days it was like that— you trying to force it out him and him telling you no; and you tried everything, even withholding sex; which never lasted long because jake was persuasive little shit.

Eventually you gave up; until he came to you again— you knew it was a dream again; but he wasn't trying to trick you this time; it wasn't him trying to disguise himself as Jake, it was actually him. “So you chose to die?” He asked , you couldn't move your legs, you could only sit up. “All you had to do was take the necklace off,” he said. “is it because of jake isn't it?” you felt his finger on your ankle. “would you miss fucking little jakey?” he mocked you again.

“Are you getting turned on again?” his finger dragging up your thigh. “you didn't tell him earlier, why didn't he want him to find out you got wet from me threatening you earlier?” he made his way to your thigh, squeezing hard, you whimpered, his face was angry. “you keep asking questions.” he dug his fingers into your thigh. “you want to know why?” he said. “Why I killed her?” you couldn't move anyway so it was an obvious rhetorical question. “because she was a murderer,” he spat. “and I hate those the most.”

What was he talking about? you wanted to say something, but you couldn't; you wanted to ask him, but you couldn't open your mouth. “stop asking questions about me.” he finally let your leg go. “Next time I snap your fucking neck.” and just like that he was gone— you shot up feeling your legs , looked down at them; no bruises, breathless you looked around your room; everything was normal. except the fucking adrenaline wouldn't stop running through your veins, and the obvious ache in between your legs.

when you finally came to, you were livid; he had no right to be upset with you; you didn't murder anybody, so why was he so upset with you? why'd he want to kill you so badly? and who the hell did she kill; that really wasn't on the top of your list now, finding the murderous man. “sunghoon!”

your voice was booming throughout the house. “I know you're listening, you're all always fucking listening.” you yanked at your hair frustrated. “so fucking answer me , sunghoon!” you felt like you were going crazy , screaming into the air like a lunatic. “what?” you turned around, and there he was. “I told you to le—” before he could finish , all you saw was red , before raising your hand , slapping the demon across the face. “What the fuck?”

“how fucking dare you?” you hissed. “whatever my grandmother did to you doesn't have shit to do with me , so don't you ever interfere with my dreams again.” you said. “and I'm not taking the necklace off , your little scare tactic doesn't scare me anymore.” he scoffed. “scare tactic?” He said. “That's what you think it is?” you could almost feel the heat bouncing off his body. “I said next time I will snap your neck.” before you could get a word out , your words were cut short; his hand wrapping around your neck. “I meant it.”

you could see his eyes flash red; he finally was gonna kill you. “I told you to take off the necklace and leave,” he said. “you should've listened.” He heard your heartbeat going faster, he wanted to do it, end it before he could start— but he couldn't.” He let you go , you gasped falling to the floor. “Stay away from me, stop calling out my name,” he said. “He's here.” before you could say something he was gone and Jake was here , ready to console you.

“you almost killed her!” Jake wanted to snap the boy's neck; that wouldn't help he was already dead. “but he didn't.” sunghoon sat on the bed. “and why didn't you sunghoon?” he sighed. “because she's innocent.” he said. “and?” he looked at Jake. “I'm not a killer , I don't kill innocent people.”

You rub the sleep from your eyes; sitting up, rubbing your sore neck. “you're gonna be fine.” a voice made you look up. “su-sunghoon.” you stuttered. “I'm not gonna hurt you calm down.” he said. “You tried to choke me.” You said. “yeah well now that you're not a murderer i have no reason to.” He said. “That's not how you apologize.” you said. “because it wasn't an apology.” you both stared into each other's eyes, before he coughed. “go to bed.” you tried to say something, but before you could blink— he was gone. “what?” then you realized, it wasn't a dream— he was really in your room.

you don't see him again— and soon saturday rolls around; and your date with kai. “you really don't have to go.” Jake followed you around the house as you got ready. “Well I already agreed , so yes I do.” you said. “why'd you agree in the first place?” you turned to him. “Because he's the first human I've come across since I came up here.” he pouted. “I can come with you.” you stood with your hand on your hips. “its supposed to be a date.” you said. “why would I bring you on a date?" he frowned, "why would you go on a date?" you pinched his cheek. “I'll only be gone for a few hours.”

you met kai at the bar; he was waiting at a table for your arrival. “kai!” you waved. “hey.” he stood up, hugging you. “you made it.” he let you go. “Of course I did.” you followed suit. “order anything you want , it's on me tonight.” He said. “You don't have to.” he shook his head. “Think of it as a very late welcome gift.”

“you're really pretty, you know that?” the red faced boy said. “I wanted to say that ever since I saw you first.” he was drunk , slurring his words. “but I was nervous.” he pouted, it was cute; it reminded you of jake. “but I was so happy when you said yes to going out with me,” he said. “I'm glad,” you said , and you genuinely were, but your mind was elsewhere; it was on sunghoon. why was he on your mind? he tried to kill you, you tried to shake it away.

“Are you okay?” he asked , both of you walking out. “yeah, are you okay?” you laughed , watching him stumble. “Will you be able to drive?” he shook his head. “I live down the road with my brothers, I'm fine, are you okay to drive?” you only had one drink , knowing you had to drive. “Yeah I'm fine,” he nodded. “Can I see you again?” your mind kept shifting , from him to jake— to sunghoon. “We'll see.”

you drove back to the house , pulling into the driveway. “Jake?” you call out , not getting an answer; but a noise , from the kitchen. “Jake?” there was the sound of glass shattering. “Jake , I told you to turn the light on , you've broken three of the mugs.” you threw your bag down , walking into the kitchen. “Jake get out of the ki—.” you froze in your spot. It wasn't Jake standing over the shards of glass; it was sunghoon. “I broke it , cleaned it.” he said. “wh-why are you here?” you asked. “Because you've been calling out for me for an hour , it started to get annoying.” He said. “I thought I said don't call out for me.”

“I didn't— you have been, you've been thinking about me, I heard it , felt it.” he said. “It's annoying.” you frowned. “Well you try being choked and then finding out you can't escape the thing trying to kill you, and then the thing trying to kill you is standing over a broken mug telling you to clean it.” you said. “That's annoying as well.” his face is stoic , but so is yours; staring at each other , both of you filling up with anger again. “I don't like you.”

you scoffed. “feeling is mutual.” he stepped closer , you stepped back. “i-im not scared of you.” He smirked. “I can hear your heartbeat dummy.” he said. “It's late out , why are you coming in late?” He had the nerve to ask you questions. “what's it matter to you?” he shrugged. “you smell like alcohol.” He scrunched his nose up in disgust. “you were out drinking? was it with a guy , little jakey won't like that.” it was your turn to scoff. “jakey or you?”

“What you do isn't my concern,” he said. “says the one standing in my kitchen , asking where I've been , seems like you like to make anything I do your concern.” you said, he stepped closer. “because I have no choice.” He said , standing over you now. “All because of that stupid necklace , as long as you're wearing it, I can hear what you're doing, see you.” he stopped. “feel what you're feeling.” your breath hitched as you felt his hand go up to your hair. “It's killing me.” you felt a tug on it, you whimpered. “i can't fucking escape you.”

he couldn't stop himself; his lips attaching to your neck with quickness, pushing you against the kitchen counter. “su-sunghoon.” he yanked on your head back. “don't speak.” He continued to attack your neck. “don't fucking speak.”

his hand gripped your waist; it most likely was gonna leave a bruise, but you didn't care. after leaving your neck covered in bruises, he pulled away. “On your knees.” he pushed you down. “gotta shut you up.” he groaned , unzipping his pants, pulling his underwear down just a bit to free his cock from its confinements , slapping against his abdomen. “open.”

you don't know why you were doing this; he tried to kill you; you should be scared of him— but that all seemed to not matter as he pushed his cock into yours mouth. “fuck.” he groaned, his cock hitting the back of your throat. “suck it , suck my fucking dick.” he growled. “wanna fuck your face.”

tears streaming down your face; drooling as he abused your throat. “so fucking messy -fuck- i can hear all the dirty thoughts on your little head.” he cursed. “so dirty, letting someone who hurt you fuck your tiny little throat.” he moaned, your thighs tightening together. “you're horny I can feel it.” he said. “need someone fu-fuck you.” he held your hair once more , pulling you off his cock. “not yet.” he pulled you off him, stroking his hard on. “gonna make you want it.” he said. “fuck you.” you spat; your mind was everywhere, you pissed at him— more importantly, you were horny. “still running that mouth.” he cursed, stroking faster. “see how fucking stupid you look -fuck- trying to be pissed at me , covered in my cum.” he growled. “fuck I'm cumming.” you felt his cum hitting your cheeks , tapping your lips. “So messy.”

You woke up the next morning; everything running through your head , you groaned. “yeah it happened.” Jake said. “I wish I could make it disappear from my mind.” you looked at the boy. “You two are sexually bonded to each other in a weird way,” he said. “like super weird , you hate each other so much , but you also want to fuck each other.” You stared at him. “i'm not jealous, I know our bond is stronger.” you rolled your eyes. “hey I'm not the one who fucked the demon who tried to kill me.” he shrugged. “I hate you.”

He was back two days later; you were sitting on your bed , when he pushed open your closet door. “Did I say you can use that, did I?” you said. “Yeah well I did.” he said, sitting down on the bed. “you were thinking about me again.” you stared at him. “Who did my grandmother make you kill?” His face dropped. “I’m not talking to anyone about that , especially you.” he said. “Why?” he said. “cause it was my grandmother.”

“You want to know? really?” he said , you nodded, “I do.” “It was your grandfather,” his voice was laced with bitterness. “she made me kill your grandfather.” you furrowed your eyebrows. “No you're lying, grandfather died of a heart attack.” you said. “Did he? or was it because I crushed his heart?” you gulped, he was looking you dead in the eyes. “why?” you asked. “She was tired of him , just wanted him gone , and she couldn't do it,” He said. “no , why did you kill him?” you said. “my told me he was the kindest man she'd ever known.”

“He was,” he said. “I couldn't do anything about it.” you scoffed. “So you just had to kill him?” he huffed. “You wouldn't understand,” he said. “Yeah I do, you're a murderer.” you could see his eyes turn red. “I'm not a murderer.” you curled back against the headboard. “I was a slave to her , to that fucking necklace— to who ever owns it.” He said. “That's my punishment.”

“punishment?” you questioned, “what kind of stupid punishment is that?” he closed his eyes , before continuing on. “As punishment for killing innocent people , I became a slave,” he said. “They killed her , she did nothing wrong and they killed her.” His fit was tightly closed. “who?” you asked. “Her name was mina.” he said. “she was my first love, it was supposed to be a robbery, we both were supposed to be out, but she didn't feel like it , so she stayed.”

“So you sold your soul like Jake?” you asked. “But he isn't a slave?” he scoffed. “If you think watching the love of your life die for the past 100 years is considered good , then you're just as crazy as I thought.” He said. “I didn't sell my soul , I died and went to hell.” he said. “After they killed her , I went crazy; I wanted revenge.” he said. “So I found them , all of them— and I killed them,” he said. “But you said they were trying to rob you, so they were not innocent.”

“they weren't, but there was this rage inside , I killed everyone in that house that night; including myself,” he said. “when I got to hell , he forced me to live through killing 2 innocent people and myself and over.” he said. “until I was begging on my knees for him to stop.” he said. “I told him I'd do anything.” and he turned me into a demon, and sent me here, forced to live out eternity as a slave for the people to whoever found that necklace, in the house I killed those people in.”

“So you killed her?” you asked. “When I'm told to do something, it's like I can't control my body— she forced me to kill an innocent person,” he said. “I was punished that night, he said if I ever killed any innocent person again I would be punished,” he said. “how were you punished?” “That's not important.” He said. “After that I thought she'd stop , then I started hearing her thoughts about killing her caregiver. Her caregiver had a child , 2 daughters and no husband, and she wanted me to kill her, for no reason. I couldn't wait until she told me and I couldn't stop , so I had to do it.” he said , staring off into space. “I had to kill her , so no one else got hurt,” he said, before staring at you. “You look like her when she was younger, I guess I really just hated her that bad.” you didn't say anything, just sat there in silence.

“don't look at me like that,” he said. “with pity, I don't want your pity.” He stood up. “I only told you so you'd stop asking jake.” He said. “I don't need your sympathy.” You sat up fully. “I wasn't going give you any.” You said. “You still tried to kill me.” You said. “and how do i know you aren't lying , demons don't really have a good track record of being truthful.” he grew frustrated, lifting his shirt up. “because this is what happened when I killed your grandfather.” Three long scratches on his chest. “This is what happens when I kill an innocent person.”

“yo-you can't heal them?” he huffed. “don't you think I would if I could?” he scoffed. “What the hell am I doing here? explaining myself to you.” he went to walk away. “no.” you said. “sit down.” He looked at you with anger on his face. “I said sit down.” he moved to the bed, sitting down. “I don't want to be here with you.” He said. “Too bad, because I'm not letting you leave , and I'm keeping the necklace on.” before you could say anything else, he was yanking your legs down , pinning them to the bed. “Fine then I'll do what I came here to do in the first place, the real reason you keep thinking about me.” he climbed on top of you. “to fuck you.”

he pulled down your sleep shorts , leaving you in your underwear. “open your fucking legs.” he growled , pulling your underwear down. “so fucking wet , do you get off on the fact that I don't like you?” you smirked. “wipe that smirk off your face before I shove my dick back down your throat.” his eyes were red , but filled with lust; not anger. “Please , you enjoy that more than I did, I remember you moaning and groaning too well.” He gripped your cheeks. “slut.”

Slapping the inside of your thighs, holding them open. “God you're dripping, you want me to fuck you that bad?” He pulled his cock from his pants. “just hurry up and fuck me.” he roughly shoved himself inside you, both of you moaning out. “shit!” he moaned, moving his hips , holding down your waist , keeping you still as he abused your cunt. “tight fucking cunt , sucking in my cock like a slut.” his hand coming up to your neck. “fu-fuck , please faster.” You moaned , his hips speeding up.

you were so close to cumming, you could feel it— then you felt him slip out of you. “Kee— I know what you're doing, trying to get your way.” he said. “I will gag you to keep that mouth shut if I have to.” he flipped you over; your ass up in the air, pushing your head in the pillow. “stop trying to tell me what to do.” he slammed back into you , you tell as he slapped your ass. “Just shut up and take my cock.”

his movements were lethal; his hip snapping against your ass , watching it bounce back. “fuck sunghoon.” You screamed. “Please let me cum.” he moaned. “fuck, fuck go ahead cum.” he squeezed your ass. “cum all over my cock.” your legs shook as you came , eyes rolling to the back of your head as he fucked you through your orgasm. “shit I'm gonna cum , I'm gonna cum inside.” He groaned , “take my fucking cum.” you felt his cum filling you up , his hips twitching as he came. “sh-shit.” he pulled out of you.

“I'm not gonna make you murder anyone.” You said. “I don't think I ever wanted anyone dead.” he looked at you. “Well there was talia in second grade who took my pink crayon.” You thought about it further. “and a few of my ex's , but I wouldn't act on it or force someone else to do it.” you said. “and how do I know that?” He said. “you have to trust me, just how I have to trust that you won't snap and kill me.” You said. “you’re safe for now,” he said. “I can live with that.” you said. “but the next time you ever try to tell me what to do when im fucking you, I will gag you.” you rolled your eyes. “whatever.”

“I'm leaving,” he said. “Jake should be here soon , and I don't want to see him right after this , he'll be sulky for days.” you smiled. “he's cute isn't he?.” he scrunched his nose in disgust. “no, no he is not.” you pouted , then spoke up. “was it you?” you asked. “what are you talking about?” he said. “The one in the mirror on my first with the necklace?” he laughed. “the last thing that day wasn't fucking you or seeing you naked.” he said. “It was murdering you.”

“asshole.” you said, he smirked. “it was jay.” He said. “jay, jake told me he hasn't shown himself for the past 200 years.” he shrugged.

“i guess you're special , congratulations.”

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