#unemployment sucks so bad right now ;;;;;

[eleanorose123]

See now I'm at a weird point in life where it's like- should I just make a YGO side account for Instagram even if I don’t use Instagram much at all lol

[alittlebitofloveliness]

Stevie Fic

This is a Stevie first meeting fic based on this amazing art and concept by @your-unfriendlyghost Like most of my stuff its not betaed. Enjoy!

*************

Evie really fucking wants to hit something.

It’s probably a bad idea considering hitting something-  well, someone-  is what got her here in the first place, but right now it feels like her options are fight or cry and she really doesn’t want to cry. 

The bench in the holding cell is cold under her bare legs, her skirt not long enough to properly cover them, but she can’t bring herself to care in the slightest, despite the fact she’s sharing the holding cell with two guys, one a drunk sleeping off a hangover in the corner, the other a tough looking greaser she vaguely recognizes from school, who’s flicking a lighter idly, clearly bored out of his mind. Her right hand is aching something awful, knuckles all split and bloody, but she clenches her fist tighter, letting the skin pull back, watches the small cuts reopen and the blood well up, filling the tiny cracks in the surrounding skin. It smarts something awful, but it’s kind of mesmerizing all the same. 

She focuses on the sharp sting, pretending the tears pricking her eyes are because of that instead of the fact that mom’s here talking to the police sergeant but she’s still never been further away. 

How did this even happen? A year ago her mother was her favourite person in the whole world. It was the two of them against the world, always had been, ever since dad died back when she was six. Mom never used to have a problem with how she dressed or did her hair, never used to care if she made lewd jokes or chewed with her mouth open because mom’s own manners were even worse and she liked them that way. A year ago if any man mom was seeing raised a hand to her mom would’ve punched him herself, fuck the consequences or the injuries, because she wasn’t ever gonna let a man know she was afraid of him, even if she was. A year ago if Evie had swung at someone for a good reason mom would’ve bailed her out and took her out for ice cream, smiled her crooked smile and told her she was right proud of her and her fighting spirit, made her promise to keep it close to her heart.

Now? Mom’s so different she might as well be a different person, and if this is the thanks Evie’s going to get for defending her, well, she can fucking fend for herself. If mom wants to simper and smile and bend over backwards for a man who treats her like dirt and Evie even worse she can fucking do it. If she wants to take his side and fuss over his broken nose while Evie’s stuck in this fucking cell then good riddance. But Evie’s never gonna throw a punch to defend her again, not ever. Hell, she might not even stick around the house. If mom’s gonna choose a man she met three months ago over the daughter she’s raised for the past sixteen years, why bother? Home hardly feels like home anymore anyway, what with Dean’s clothes in dad’s old dresser, and his presence sucking the air out of every room. Mom’s art supplies have been shoved into the closet to make room for Dean’s unemployment papers, and last week Evie got home from school to find he’d thrown out all her model airplanes. She’d sobbed- she’d been collecting them since she was six, and building the green one was the last thing she did with dad before he passed- but mom just told her to stop acting like such a child because they ‘were only toys anyway’ and went right back to cooking Dean dinner. As if she didn’t know those planes meant absolutely everything to her. As if she hadn’t scraped and saved to buy her one for her birthday every single year without fail. Like she didn’t even care.

A fresh wave of anger rushes through her at the memory, and the next thing Evie knows she’s on her feet, her fist connecting with the concrete wall. She feels more than she hears something in her hand crack, and the fresh wave of agony is definitely similar to when she broke her arm back in kindergarten, but she doesn’t even care. It feels good. She wants to hit something. She wants to hurt. She wants to throw punches the way her mother taught her in the hopes they will somehow help her forget said mother’s betrayal.

“Hey!” A cop with cropped brown hair raps on the cell door with his baton so hard the bars rattle, “knock it off!”

She glares at him for a second but drops back onto the bench. She tells herself it’s because she really does want to get out of here, preferably today, but deep down she knows it’s because the man’s cold eyes and the way he swings the baton make it clear he’d be all too happy to use it on her. 

“Crazy bitch,” she hears him mutter as he walks off,and she stiffens, suddenly wishing she’d spit on him while she had the chance. 

“What’d you expect?” A different voice answers, “These greasy chics are all the same. Wild as rabid dogs.”

A snicker. “And they dress just as poorly. My Adeline ever stepped outta the house wearing something like that she’d never be allowed back in.”

Their voices fade, getting reabsorbed into the racket of the precinct, but there words have already sunk into her skin, leaving cuts under her surface, making a home in the piece of her thats hates herself. She shivers a bit, hugging her jacket tighter around herself, and glowers at the linoleum floor, pointedly ignoring the prickling uncomfortable feeling of being watched. Between her outburst and the cop’s shouting it’s little wonder half the precinct is staring, but she refuses to give them the satisfaction of meeting any of their gazes. Besides, it’s not like she isn’t already used to being looked at like she’s a freak.

“--I mean?” Evie recognizes Dean’s voice easily, even over the din of the rest of the station, conspicuous due to its deep cadence and domineering tone, “that’s not normal behaviour, nice girls don’t do that. I really think I oughta press charges.”

Her head snaps up and she glares at him, snarling, despite the fact he’s pretending to ignore her. Even if he doesn’t see it, mom will, will know that Evie is nothing short of genuine in her hatred, that she regrets nothing. 

Besides, she knows the threat is an empty one anyway. Dean talks a good game but he knows better than to actually press charges for something like this. The cops hadn’t dragged Evieout for her side of the story yet and they’d been all too happy to put her in handcuffs- Dean’s ruined shirt and self righteous anger when he stormed in here had seen to that- but when she does get a chance to speak she’ll be all too happy to explain why she punched him in the first place, and that probably won’t go over too well with a judge.

Of course, mom could always lie for him, rendering her whole defense useless. But Evie’s trying not to think about that. Surely mom still loves her somewhere. Surely she won’t let her own daughter go to the cooler for a half baked crime even if she doesn’t. 

Right?

“It’s those friends of hers,” mom defends, letting out a trilling, fake laugh, smiling as placatingly as possible at Dean and the cop they’re sitting across from. Her eyes dart towards Evie's and away so fast she’s half convinced she imagined it, “they’re such terrible influences. She didn’t mean it.”

“She broke my nose.”

And I'd do it again, asshole, Evie thinks. Her hand is killing her, but if it wasn’t she’d have clenched her fist at the mere thought. That was the one upside of this whole situation: she’d finally been able to do what she’d been wanting to do for months. She’ll be dreaming of the satisfying crunch Dean’s nose had made when she deviated his septum for weeks. 

“She’s your daughter,” Dean continues, “Don’t you think she ought to be punished?”

“Of course I do,” mom simpers, cosying into Dean’s side, gazing up at him with such a sickeningly sweet look Evie wants to vomit,  “But don’t you think pressing charges is a little harsh? I mean, she’s never done anything like this before.”

“Well you have to do something, Caroline, she’s out of control. Talking back, giving me attitude, not listening to you either-”

He keeps going but Evie tunes him out, done listening to his bitching, God knows she already hears enough of it at home. She hates that he’s here, that he lives with them, that he’s ruined every good thing in her life. She hates the way mom looks at him. 

Most of all she hates that she only swung at him once. 

The guy across from her with the lighter is still flicking it rhythmically, the clicking sound oddly sharp, distinguishable even over the overlapping conversations in the precinct itself, but its owner doesn’t seem so bored anymore. In fact, he keeps glancing over at her and then quickly looking away every time their eyes meet. She has half a mind to tell him he’s gonna waste all the gas in his lighter if he keeps it up, or maybe offer him a cigarette in exchange for a light, but she figures the boys in blue might decide to take some issue with that and she isn’t about to get a full pack of marlboros confiscated when she only just bought them.

“Fine!” Dean is suddenly looking right at her, voice rising above the precinct for real this time, “I won’t press charges this time, but I’m sure as hell not paying her bail. She can rot here as far as I’m concerned.”

The rage is a tidal wave bursting through a dam, all consuming and back full force before she can even blink

“Like you could pay it anyway, asshole!” Her unbroken hand is slamming into the bars and he should be grateful for it because it’s the only standing between him and Evie wringing his thick neck, “Last I checked you were a broke, unemployed loser spending my mom’s hard earned money because youre too much much of a fuck up to have a single cent to your own name!”

He sneers, cruelly, but doesn’t rise to the bait. She’ll catch it for sure next time she’s in the house, and he’ll probably find something of hers to break in the meantime, but for the moment he manages to hold himself together.

“Enjoy the holding cell Evelyn.”

“Seriously?” She turns to mom, half desperate, half pleading, knowing it won’t make a difference and hoping foolishly, childishly, that it will anyway, “You’re just going to let him leave me here?”

“Evie-”

“You’re my mom.” Her voice breaks.

Mom flinches, but she hides it well. Evie notices, because she knows her tells, knows the slight trick of her left eye is her way of hiding heartbreak, just like she knows mom never really got over losing dad as much as she always tried to convince herself she did, knows Dean saw the loneliness that festered in mom’s heart and twisted it to his advantage. She knows that mom is strong in some ways but not all of them and that a part of her has given up. She just hadn’t realized until now that the part of her that gave up had given up on Evie.

“I did it for you,” her voice is shaking, and Dean could be screaming and the precinct could be burning around them and it wouldn’t matter because all she can see right now is her mother’s apologetic brown eyes and the fact that she has let her down for the last time, “for you. Not for me. And this is the thanks I get?”

“I’m sorry,” mom whispers, shame twisting her features, “but- but you did a bad thing Evie, and-and we don’t really have the money for bail right now anyway. They’ll only hold you for a day or two anyway and then you can come home and we’ll figure this out, the three of us.”

“Come home?” She can’t help the scoff that forces its way out of her throat, “You think you can leave me here, after everything, and I’ll just come home like nothing happened?”

“You don’t mean that.”

“Try me.”

“Dean’s right,” mom shakes herself and the glimpse of her true self is gone, replaced by the shell of a woman filled with Dean’s slimy thoughts, “you need a few days to cool down. You’re impossible to talk to right now.”

“Imagine how much more impossible to talk to I’ll be when I'm gone and your sack of human shit boyfriend won’t even let you try to find me!” Evie yells at her retreating back, “Huh? Huh, you fucking bitch! Fuck. You.” She punctuates the last two words with a weak rap against the bars, but as suddenly as her anger overtook her it has drained away, leaving nothing but misery in its wake.

The brown haired cop doesn’t have to rap on the bars this time to make her behave. She slinks back to the bench, a woman defeated. 

She doesn’t cry, but it’s a near thing. In fact, she still might. It’s taking a lot of harsh blinking and biting the inside of her cheek to keep the tears from falling, but she refuses to crumple here, to be weak in front of a room full of men who have already seen her humiliated and powerless, men who have actively participated in making her that way. They will not get the victory of seeing her cry too. They won’t. 

“Here,” suddenly the boy with the lighter is next to her, holding out a stained, but soft looking rag. She must have stared at him a beat too long because he clears his throat awkwardly, cheeks reddening ever so slightly, “for your hand.”

“Oh,” she’d all but forgot about her split knuckles and probably broken ring finger, but when she looks down she can see that it’s started to swell something awful, which has in turn increased how much she’s bleeding, “thanks.”

She struggles to wrap the rag clumsily around her knuckles. Without meaning to she makes the mistake of accidentally twitching her broken finger and drops the rag with a hiss, instinctively cradling her hand closer to her chest.

“Here, let me- I mean- I can wrap your hand for you? If you want?” Lighter guy offers. He’s endearingly awkward, and, Evie has to admit, kind of cute, with his thick dark hair and glowing bronze skin. He looks about as rough as most guys from their side of town, intimidating with his leather jacket and seemingly instinctual scowl, but he doesn’t seem scary. Not really. Not when he’s this kind.

Wordlessly she holds out her hand and he takes her wrist with a gentleness that’s unprecedented from such large callused hands, clearly used to hard work, as he carefully threads the cloth over and around her knuckles, covering most of the cuts without tying anything too tightly.

She’s almost disappointed when he pulls away.

“You’re real good at that.”

“Yeah well,” he grins, suddenly roguish and Evie can see how he could be mean if he wanted to, “it’s not exactly my first time bandaging bruised knuckles. Might be my first time bandaging them on a girl though.”

“Oh yeah?” Despite her misery she can feel a smile tugging at the corner of her own lips.

He nods. “You oughta join a rumble sometime, looks like that right hook of yours does some real damage.”

“He deserved it!” Evie snaps. 

“Looked like it,” The boy agrees, holding up his hands in surrender. He’s quiet for a minute, then adds, “Sounded like it too.”

Something about the way he says it makes her pause.

“He was gonna hit my mom,” she admits, shivering at the memory of Dean’s rage and the way mom had tensed, hands flying up to shield her face. She’d said after, when Dean was still screaming and everything had gone to shit that he’d never done it before, but her reaction had told Evie otherwise. “He was standin’ over her and I could see him pulling back and in that moment it felt like my options were hit or be hit. So I punched him.”

“Tuff.”

Evie blinks. “Ya think?”

“Yeah,” he nods, “I really do.”

Something in her chest relaxes at that, at not only his non judgemental assessment of her actions but his clear approval of them. She hadn’t realized how much she needed someone on her side until now.

She looks at him, really looks at him. Aside from his thick hair and smooth skin, he’s got slightly crooked teeth and a strong nose. His eyes are angry, but righteously so, not cruelly so, and there is kindness hidden in the curve of his cheek and the calluses of his hands.

“You’re Steve, right? I’ve seen you around school before with that friend of yours. The blond one.”

“Sodapop, yeah,” He gives her an odd look, slightly pleased but clearly taken aback, “I gotta be honest, I’m not used to people knowing my name and not his.”

“Oh,” It’s her turn to blush, “well, I-I guess he never really made much of an impression on me.”

“Well since you seem to know my name, does that mean I made an impression on you?” 

“No,” her cheeks are burning and she doesn’t sound convincing, even to herself, but if she’d seen Steve Randle doing pull ups when she walked past the boys gym class once and made a point of learning his name, that’s no one's business but her own. It didn’t have to mean anything. It didn’t mean anything before now. “Shut up.”

He laughs, and she should probably be annoyed because he’s definitely teasing her but it’s such a nice sound, carefree and inherently defiant, that it’s hard to do anything but enjoy it.

“Someone call for a jailbreak?” 

Before Steve can properly answer they’re interrupted.

Speak of the devil, Evie thinks, silently cursing Sodapop as he grins through the bars at Steve, flanked by an older boy wearing ascuffed letterman jacket and the brown haired cop from earlier. He couldn’t have waited to get here just a few minutes longer?

“Took you long enough,” Steve rises fluidly to his feet as the cop unlocks the cell, and nods at the other boy, “Hey superman. What’re you doin’ here?”

“Gotta be over 18 to bail someone out Steve-o,” Sodapop singsongs, before the older boy can get a word in, “an’ I figured you wouldn’t want me gettin’ mom or dad involved unless I had to.”

“Thanks man,” Steve pulls them each into one of those odd half hugs boys do, clapping the big one called Superman on the shoulder as he pulls away, “speaking of, any chance you’d be willing to sign for one more person? I’ll pay the bail, I just need your signature.”

He looks over his shoulder expectantly and Evie realizes with a start that he means bail for her.

“What? No! Steve you guys can’t- I don’t got the scratch to pay you back-”

“Well I ain’t about to leave you here by your lonesome all night, and it don’t seem like your mom’s fixing to come back anytime soon. Darry here won’t mind signin’ the papers since I’m vouchin’ for you.”

‘’Course not.” The older boy agrees.

Evie bites her lip, considering. She really, really doesn’t want to stay here, especially without Steve for company, but she also doesn’t have the funds to pay him back.

“I really can’t pay you back-”

“Listen, if you really wanna pay me back you could agree to go out on a date with me?“

“O-oh,” she smiles down at her feet, “I- yeah, I’d love to.”

“Really?”

He really shouldn’t sound so shocked. She’d basically been the one to admit to liking him, after all.

“Yeah. Really really.”

“I’m Evie by the way,” she tells him as she and Steve walk side by side out of the precinct, realizing she has yet to introduce herself, despite how long they’ve been talking.

“Oh,” Steve's grin is playful, “I know. I make a point of learning the names of pretty girls.”

“I guess I must’ve made an impression on you too, huh?”

He gently takes her non broken hand in his, twining their fingers together.

‘Yeah,” he agrees, “I guess so.”

[dicksmasher]

Now that Marc Rubio has confirmed they don't plan on any type of ceasefire in Gaza (big fucking suprise) where are all of the tumblr leftists who felt like voting for Trump or against Harris would somehow save Gaza? Like, are you stupid?

Both options fuck Gaza because this country is in Israel's pocket, it fucking sucks but its the reality. The problem is, only one of those options was going to end up destroying our home turf as well, piece by piece. You think Roe V Wade being overturned was bad? What about when the department of Education gets dismantled and kids stop going to school everywhere. Or when water and food and safety regulations are defanged further and people start getting poisoned by their food and the water becomes unsafe to drink in more and more areas?

Or when workers rights get pulled back and before you know it you can lose your job if you aren't working 70 hour weeks, you don't get paid extra for overtime, your job no longer legally has to let you eat or rest. You're no longer protected from discrimination, and there are no fallbacks like unemployment or food stamps when you do get fired. And then when you work like this and your body breaks down, you can't even get decent care at the hospital anymore because you either can't afford it or the the hospital near you shut down, or both.

They'll be coming for gay marriage and interracial marriage and women's rights. If you were born AFAB they will fight to remove your right to vote and will fight to have your born gender reassigned to you if you tried to legally change it (goes for AMAB folks as well).

You think people will riot and keep these changes from happening? Don't worry, Trump already said he'd use military force to shut that down. And in case you're too young/uneducated/live under a rock to know this, it would not be the first time our government killed its own citizens to shut down legitimate protests, so don't lie to yourself and think it's not something that would not absolutely happen, probably worse than it's ever happened. Trump is not physically capable of caring about anything other than himself.

The angry 20 somethings that voted on vibes alone (or didnt vote at all) have no idea what they're in for and only their ignorance to blame. They wanted a perfect candidate that would magically fix everything for them but what they didn't realize is that has not been an option for a while, if ever. Every election, you have to choose the best option available to climb out of the hole and not dig it deeper. It takes time. Now the hole will be dug so deep we may not, as a country, ever get out.

[orpheuslament]

Are queer people not entitled to employment where you live? I majored in history which is also considered useless so I went to grad school for library and information science. I’m just curious because yeah I look like a transitioning gay boy at my library and nobody gives a shit because my coworkers all socialists and hardcore lesbians. I don’t know what the situation is like over there or if unemployment is really bad right now but its hard to hear that your looks would some how preclude you from getting a job. That really sucks.

its just harder to get a job anywhere when you dont look like a typical cishet person unless you get lucky & find some place where theyre actually looking for that. i thought this was universal lmao

[klapollo]

do you think there is any chance your landlord would let you break the lease if you express your concerns? I've been in some shit basement suites and I really feel for you :(

two issues w this

a) i'm month to month so i could pretty easily but i don't WANT to. i genuinely really loved living here until he came. i spent four months loooooving this apartment. i would literally be so excited to come home because for the first time, my home was my happy place. it was always incredibly quiet and peaceful. it has all my utilities + furniture + central air and heat with my own bedroom, kitchen and living area for a very reasonable price for nyc. my landlord is very nice and helpful as far as landlords go and is very easy to live with when it's just her. this guy started living here inexplicably about a month and a half ago (i suspect he's just gotten out ol some kind of trouble, is detoxing from some substance issue or is otherwise deposed bc he never leaves + the erratic behavior + he was never here more than VERY occasional visits until recently)

b) i have nowhere else to go right now. i have no job, so i can't apartment hunt because i have no income beyond unemployment and then no pay stubs to show which would further hamper my search and make me difficult to lease to. this sucks but at least the days are usually more good than bad -- my parents' home is unbearable. i don't really have anyone i can stay with irl either, even for just occasional overnight visits. i have people i can call in an emergency if i'm in serious danger but that's about it and i can't go anywhere for anything less than "i'm pretty sure he's going to kill me."

i'm really just hoping this is temporary and he goes back to wherever he was living before he came here soon.

[newsom]

Maybe a weird question but how do you support a partner who has been unemployed for a long while? My partner has been looking for a job since getting laid off last december and has had a terrible time even getting callbacks so I know this must be weighing on their self-confidence but i'm not sure how i can help.

not a weird question, lots of love to you both! it sucks so bad for everyone involved, but one of the best things my gf did for me during my unemployed convalescence was to remind me of all the ways we were actually fine. i mean i don't know your exact situation but in general it'll probably be true that

being unemployed is one of the most common things ever, your partner is not and has never been alone in this, especially now when the job market is ass across the board

your partner has you, and is presumably on unemployment benefits, and even though it does feel awful, neither of you are in dire straits

it's one of the most beautiful times of the year, in the northern hemisphere anyway, and the world is spinning and both of you are a part of it. it's really easy to get solipsistic in these situations and one of the most helpful things you can do is actively push back on that.

some other concrete things my gf would do for me when i was tipping over the edge of despair:

make me stand up from my desk and shake it out - literally set a timer for 1-2 and just shake all of your limbs until you're short of breath. it REALLY helps relieve overall body tension!

hype me up - this depends on your partner's willingness/ability to be cheered up by this sort of thing i guess, but i'm a preener so it always helped a little just to be reminded of my wins, no matter how small. your partner has been offered a job before, and they will be offered a job again! they are capable and competent and good at what they do. did they send out an application today? they're literally doing exactly what they need to be doing. they're not making any mistakes here. they are just doing what they can in a day to get a little closer to a better tomorrow and that's all anyone can possibly expect of them.

also, if it's at all possible they shouldn't work on job applications after 5pm or on the weekends! it is just another day job right now, and they don't need to do anything extra or give themselves a hard time. job hunting sucks really badly, but it's also just another thing people do during the day, and personally it always really helped to be reminded of that. best of luck to both of you <333

[peachesnabsinthe]

Almost Two Weeks of Unemployment

** Tw/cw: This post contains discussions on chronic physical and mental illness. Things that may be discussed include personal medical diagnoses, treatment, and disability. Please be mindful before reading!**

So it has been almost 2 weeks of unemployment for me. It's been so difficult. I didn't think that I would take it so rough.

I did have my doctors appointment on Monday, and I was diagnosed with hEDS and POTS ( I have a whole list of other diagnoses as well, being disabled is SO FUN hahaHagfljsdga). It has been a very, very LONG and tedious process and I'm beyond exhausted. I've honestly been struggling with pretty severe suicidal ideation as well (don't worry, I'm fine, and any fellow folks struggling with this as well, I see you, and I feel you, and you're gonna be fine too believe it or not). I had been afraid of losing my job and my life drastically changing due to my physical health for many years, and now that it's happening, I've been struggling with such overwhelming grief.

However, I KNOW that this is the best decision I made, BECAUSE of the lifestyle changes that I'm going to have to make in order to get back to living more comfortably (and of course to just function in a more healthy/sustainable way). I already have an XRAY appointment set up to look at my neck/shoulder, hips, and hands. I am also going to start the Dallas-Levine Exercise Protocol soon, though I really need to do some research on whether or not I even have access to a Physical Therapist or someone/something to assist me (I'm honestly nervous to do it on my own, I sometimes injure myself just doing basic, low-impact 10 minute yoga videos).

I'm also incredibly lucky and incredibly grateful that my partner, friends and family have been so supportive and kind about everything going on. The majority of them don't know how to handle this, which is understandable because it's a lot and I don't know how to handle it either! I don't need anyone to give me tips or any advice, just them listening and holding space for me is so helpful. I am able to stop working and have the ability and privilege now to JUST focus on my health, and not many people get to do this. My new health insurance situation appears to be good, and I have a new PCP that actually gives a shit about me. And in this godforsaken country and state (howdy Okies), that's a damn good thing! Don't EVEN get me started on a healthcare discussion, I'm apparently not supposed to get too agitated or else my POTS flares up lmfaaaoo so I won't go there.

But yea. It's been rough. This week so far has been pretty intense. It's so hard trying to deprogram myself. All my life I have been told that I'm too sensitive, I'm a baby, you're just weak, it's not that bad, people have it worse than you, etc. and FUCK. ALL. THAT. NONSENSE. Zoë was a sick child, and is still a sick adult, and that's fine! Now I get to do what I need to do to heal myself, and it fucking sucks and seems miserable right now, but I'm alive and I have to keep going. Because there's still things to experience, even if I have to experience them in a way that is different from everyone else. My body and brain will never be like other people's, and that's okay! I get to deprogram and learn how to live my life in a way that will be best for me.

All that to say, if you are also struggling with mental and/or physical illness, you're not alone. and I see you.

[disco-cola]

dudes i need to rant cause yall know this is my online diary so i honestly feel so lost my life has no direction and hasnt had any for the past years and the years just seem to fly by in the blink of an eye and with every year i get more anxious about my birthday and getting older and my lack of achievements well at least if you define achievements by university degrees and work experience which is sadly still the standard instilled in this society and if you struggle with anxiety and or depression and cant function you are worth less (or even worthless) and you constantly need to justify and excuse yourself and the future seems so dull not only bc of my era-struggling™ but because i literally have such a hard time with the vicious cycle of getting a job and being sucked even more into this exploitative capitalistic system (idk what its like where you live but where i live rents have risen beyond any realistic affordability, grocery prices too but work wages and unemployment "benefits" from the state have not and even people working full time living with a partner who is also working full time are struggling to pay their rent and pay for groceries and electricity and make ends meet and for what you would have to work even more than forty hours a week to be able to afford a decent lifestyle as of right now but people are already working and worrying themselves sick to not fall down behind into poverty and get a pension plan which again is the vicious cycle im talking about retirement age will probably get even higher but how are you supposed to even work until at least 67 years old when you already destroy your body and soul decades before that? people are burned out several decades before that and still so many old folks now have worked so hard all their lives to only get such little pension they still need to work despite being sick, or go collect bottles (in countries where you get a few cents for returning plastic bottles at least) or even beg. honestly its sick this cant be the essence of life. it keeps me up at night. i dont wanna do this. i dont want life to be like this. i used to wanna go into the music business so bad when i was like 18 and be a manager or in a band but ever since my era-struggle™ despite the fact i dont like whats mainstream today but i also dont think i could last a day in the fast pace of todays business with social media and cancel culture. i just couldnt. i barely can now from my current position and deleting all social media and getting a nokia or motorola flip phone like i had as a child or a landline phone seems more and more appealing. my old friends are moving into the big city and we are drifting apart. they work so much they dont have time. but i also realize that i am starting to exclude and seclude myself and dont crave much human contact anymore. it honestly drains me. even grocery shopping or walking my dog during daytime drains me at this point. i dont wanna move and live in a big city anymore like other people my age. my suburb is too much for me already. i have fantasies of escaping from here daily. i literally just wanna go move to a small beach or mountain village and open a dog daycare. this is literally the only thing i can see myself doing in the future that does not give me anxiety and makes me wanna run into oncoming traffic.

[lucybianchi]

really having one of those days where I really miss working as a video/film editor...

It's what I went to school for and it's what I'm passionate about I had a decent freelance gig for over a year and it was really nice It wasn't editing the type of content I wanted, but it was still doing what I loved and I miss that so much I had to leave because when the SAG strikes happened it halted all the work and so I got nothing and very quickly became the type of freelance editor that was just unemployed The company that had been consistently giving me work essentially ghosted me once the strikes finished and I think they used the strikes to drop bunch of editors and hire new ones for cheaper I made it very clear that I was available for editing jobs and reached out several times (I also always got back positive feedback on my edits), but I was just given the "We'll reach out when we have work!" and then never heard back from them again And this isn't the first job that's done this to me or to other editors I've worked with It sucks... And trying to find a new job is next to impossible Every job doesn't want to pay or wants a catch all "videographer, graphic designer, animator, and editor" but only wants to pay the minimum (the minimum not being a liable wage and well below 40k a year) I had to get a different job so I could pay my fucking bills after loosing work and it took me 6 months to get hired because the job market is so fucking bad right now And it's not a job that's related to my career it's really just a paycheck, and barely that It's not a terrible job, but I can feel it slowly crushing my soul I want to go back to creative work, but I can't find any jobs and because I had to make up for (and still am) 6 months of unemployment, I've now been out of the industry for over a year, so there's a lovely gap in my reel Thinking about how badly I want to go back to editing makes me want to cry and the stupidly low pay I have right now at my current job doesn't help I want to start looking again, but I don't even know where to start and I'm so discouraged by the mass amount of shit paying, scam looking jobs I do see I want to be able to be creative again I want to work on things that I and others are passionate about I'd love to get to edit indie films again or maybe get a chance to work in documentary (I did it a few times and loved it!), and lately I've been thinking about trailer editing but idk how to start and how to make up for the gap in my reel I'm a quick learner and I love what I do I take pride in my work I just need a chance to actually do it I've thought maybe I could just work on my own projects, but I'm a writer and and editor I'm not a producer or a director or a cinematographer (I have videography and photography experience but that's not the same) I prefer to be a part of a whole that makes up other people's works I love the collaboration of it all I want to be a part of the writing of a story that takes place in the edit I want to be a part of a team that helps someone's dream to be realized Gods I miss it so much~ And I know that rambling on isn't going to get me work, but I'm just feeling so restless lately And I don't know how to get back to what I love I just know I want it so bad my soul wants it

[flutenby]

I saw a post that basically mocked people saying it's easier to organise under dems than republicans, because people don't organise under dems.

Now I don't live in the USA, but I will note my observations of organising while going from a conservative government to the more left-wing major party here

You're right that it's harder to get people to organise and take action. There are many people that will absolutely take action, donate, etc, under a conservative government, but then under a more progressive government go "well the more progressive people are in, so all the problems are fixed yay!" when there are absolutely still cooked things happening. This is a pretty known phenomenon, and yeah it sucks

However, in terms of getting good things to happen, or stop the government doing shitty things? Way way way easier under the more progressive government. Yes our action groups are smaller, we have less money, and rallies get lower turnout. But the actual policies are less bad, and sometimes even good. Because you can get in contact with the more progressive government. As much as the liberal party doesn't like us, they do things that are much closer to what we want than the conservative party. And hey, sometimes they initially say no fuck you then adopt that exact policy 3 years later

This is to say - you may find it harder to organise under dems because your community is less motivated, but it is much easier to get the actual outcomes you want. No it's not going to be exactly what you want, and ok many fronts they'll still be cooked. But every fraction better you can get is worth it.

Every person that's allowed in on higher refugee caps, every person who gets higher unemployment benefits, every percentage of a degree saved by fossil fuel projects that are rejected. Even within these policies, yes the more progressive party is still not doing enough. But are you really willing to sacrifice more lives for it?

Always keep pushing left. But the mood of the country is in many ways dictated by who is in power. And when right-wing bigots are in power, you have to fight so much harder to get basically nothing. Don't ignore the people who are on the line between living and dying under conservative and more progressive governments. And don't forget that despite how hard it is to fight now, it's so much harder to win under conservative governments

[jhtechgeek2011]

Better and worse right now

I am back and things are both better and worse right now. I have found some things that help, like accommodations at school and tutoring, breaking things down, rewarding myself for what I complete, and a really solid planner/schedule/journaling system that works pretty well for me. I have been getting a lot of work done around the house lately and I finally finished English Comp 1. I passed but just barely.

Work is not going at all well yet. I am still getting 3 days a week and not being able to really use my accommodations at work like I should be able to. It just gets worse and worse for me at my job and I feel like it's killing me in pieces. I end up in so much pain by the 3rd of my work days that I can hardly walk and am completely drained. The pain lingers around in various stages of severity until I have to go back and do it again. I can't stand the place and don't want to return but I have no options. I am getting my unemployment and I wouldn't even be able to make ends meet if I didn't.

I wish I could just get the help I need not to work myself into the ground all the time. I really wish I could just get a job where I don't have to stand up where it's actually just a seated job and works with my skills and limitations rather than working against my limitations and not utilizing all of my skills. It shouldn't have to be this doggone hard just to live, It truly shouldn't. I would get SSI I am eligible but I worry that I will just get a no because my income and unemployment combined are too much. It really sucks that they look at that before they look at your medical issues. I just wish I could stop working and still have money to live on, that's all I want. Winning the lottery would be SO great, but those odds are so bad I don't even want to go there.

The car wash guys are still being their usual obnoxious selves but it got hot enough for my AC unit to go in the window so I can drown them out much better now with my fan and AC on. They still get right under my apartment window and smoke though which is annoying when I do open my window because it's cooler out and I don't necessarily need AC to have to smell their weed on my nice breeze. I am so tired of these guys that's one of the many reasons my boyfriend and I are saving up to move out as much as we can each paycheck because we GOTTA be out of here before we need heat again. The heat here is ridiculous and we don't want to spend another winter dealing with it.

Another thing frustrating for me right now is I can't afford my new glasses and I can't see very well at all right now. My prescription changed a LONG time ago, and my year between annual eye exams and insurance-covered glasses passed in February. My insurance doesn't cover my vision needs well at all. My glasses are STILL over $400 even with the insurance because they only cover 30% and my eye exam was basically $200. The contact lens eye exam isn't even covered so I couldn't even get an updated contact prescription to do that instead. They also cost an arm and a leg but are less than my ridiculous ass glasses. This is ridiculous, it shouldn't be this hard to get the very thing I need to be able to actually see.

Finally, I just want to say that life shouldn't have to be this hard, and stupid, toxic, fake people shouldn't make it worse. People just want to take everything they can and give nothing in return. So many people only call when they want something. Other than that you don't even hear from them and especially when you need something they're nowhere to be found. A lot of people are only your friend for what they can get out of it, and it sucks. All the fake, toxic, stupid, hating people need to get a life, and stay out of mine, seriously. Until next time, when you see what's going on next with Just Jen.

[messedupfan]

A CHAPTER DEDICATED TO ME??!?!?! I LIVEEEEEEE OMG I LOVE IT THANK YOU 😭😭😭😭😭😭🤩🤩🤩🤩 but my birthday was fun and not fun (I still had to work that day, admittedly i let it happen but i didn't think it would suck that bad 😵‍💫) but after that I went out with my sisters and got my gifts so a pretty nice way to end my day! And don't feel bad about missing my bday, after all I didn't tell you 😅 and as for the other questions I'm doing great, I've recently started a movie novelization collection! mostly for golden age hollywood movies cause they're my latest obsession lol and my job....😃 the only good thing I can say is im getting paid. Congrats to your new job tho!! 🥳🥳🥳 I hope you've been liking it so far and I'm happy to hear you're doing well!! the world needs some good news right now thank you 🤣🤣 oh I can't forget about the podcast!! It must be fun to do one of those omg, did you have favorites that inspired you to make yours? Ooh whose your dream guest? sorry I'm just nosy 🤣

Hey orange anon!

Of course!

Glad to hear that your birthday was fun despite the bad work day!

That's cool! How many of those have you gone through?

Glad that you're doing great!! Settling into work and the new place well?

Getting paid is definitely helpful! Hopefully things get better at that job or that you're able to find something with better pay and that you're more passionate about!

Thank you, thank you! It's been a long road of unemployment but I'm glad that it's finally nearing its end. My coworkers seem great so far.

The world is desperate for some good news right now 😭

I'm doing a lot of free self promo because I can't afford to pay for it yet so no, we cannot forget about the podcast! Haha I have been trying to put together a podcast since I was in high school. What has motivated me and inspired me to give it a go this time around is Two Hot Takes. LOVE that podcast! (I will say, some of those reddit stories are influencing Wonderstruck haha)

As for dream guest, I don't currently have one. But JoJo Siwa has made that question traumatic hahaha

No need to be sorry, it's a great question! Unfortunately, I don't have much of an answer 🙃

[antvnger]

Scott I’m about to get laid off and I’m really sad and really scared, any possible advice that could help?

Oh! Oh dude, that sucks so bad. I’m so sorry. Are you the same Anon who just *shakes head* never mind.

Okay, so… I’m going to give some practical advice and some advice for your mental health, okay?

Practical first:

I would do some digging on severance pay and benefits. Last I remember, the most common formula was based off your salary and how long you’ve been with your employer. That varies, obviously, but I would look into getting severance pay and benefits from the company. You are owed that.

If you have sick/personal/vacation time built up, you have to be paid for that as compensation. Make sure you get paid for that time too.

Also since you’re getting laid off, you’re entitled to collect unemployment insurance benefits from the government. File for it. It won’t last a really long time, but it may give you peace of mind in the in-between-jobs time.

Are you in good standing with your boss? Ask for a letter of recommendation. A good letter of recommendation can go a long way when finding a new job.

Update your health insurance

Lastly, update your resume. You never know when opportunities start knocking so have that resume and letter of recommendation ready.

Okay, now for the mental health advice:

If you’re being laid off and not fired, then listen good, Anon: it is not your fault. It’s not! Tell yourself that. Repeat it every time you feel your self-esteem take a dive. You are a good person and a good worker. This loss is not on you.

Take some time to process the whole thing. Getting laid off can be difficult and maybe even a little traumatic. You need time to let yourself process what’s going on, and it’s okay to do that. You need to do that. Anyone who tells you to suck it up and just get back on the horse needs to (respectfully) shut up.

With that being said, DO NOT make any big decisions in the days right after getting laid off. You’re not in the right mindset for those kinds of decisions, so table them for later. You might regret the decisions you make when you’re not in the right headspace.

I literally just finished answering an ask on how to start helping yourself feel better after a really horrible day, and I definitely suggest looking at those.

Work through your emotions before diving into a job search. You don’t want your negative emotions to affect you while you’re looking for a new job, especially in an interview or preparing for an interview, so work through it all first. Talk it out with a trusted person or write it out, but you gotta work that stuff out of your system. Feel it and let it go. Don’t let it become a crutch and don’t let it hold you back either.

I hope this all helps, Anon. Good luck in the days to come. It won’t always be this bad. Breathe. I know you’re scared, but you’re gonna be okay. I believe in you.

If you need anything else, you know where to find me.

[thatstormygeek]

Read an article a couple days ago that was talking about how we are not sharing a reality with the right. It opens with a description of Trump's New Hampshire speech, then moves into its argument with a paragraph describing our reality that includes a bunch of positive things that have happened under Biden.

The author crows about new jobs and low unemployment and, oddly, that the national homicide rate went down 13%. Maybe the last bit struck me because 2023 was an especially deadly year in my hometown, nearly doubling the previous year's number of homicides. But it seems a strangely specific statistic, tho. Like, if you're arguing that violent crime has gone down overall, okay...but the national murder rate seems a weird way to do that.

The unemployment/job growth part was my real sticking point, though. I seem to remember some chatter about how unemployment numbers were artificially low because they only count those actively looking for work and, thanks to covid, many people just...weren't? But I guess that's not a concern now that covid is "over," right?

Touting the number of jobs added is a qualified positive when you don't mention what kind of jobs these are. When a company eliminates one decent position and then lists three super shitty positions that never get filled, is that creating jobs? Do they account for that kind of thing in the numbers? I doubt it, but I honestly don't know.

And then there's this

I don't know - this doesn't feel like a sign of a healthy economy to me. But I'm sure reading that Biden's economy has low unemployment is comforting for these folks. And all the journalists who have lost their jobs over the last few weeks.

Yes, Dems need to promote their accomplishments, and yes, it's important to use language that people are familiar with, but it's also important to understand your audience. The traditional markers of our economy's health have been bullshit for a long time. Over the last few years, it's become increasingly apparent just how disconnected these are from most people's lives. Dems aren't going to beat the GOP on the economy using the same language they've always done.

Republicans don't believe anything that comes from a Democrat. Stop messaging to them. Y'all need to find a way to look at the economy that reflects a 21st century understanding and y'all need to do it yesterday.

But I'm not going to hold my breath. Instead they'll keep reassuring all of us that it's actually good:

Sorry you lost your job, but really unemployment is low, so vote for us.

Sorry you have to work three jobs and your landlord keeps raising your rent, but it's a good thing we keep adding new jobs, right! #VBNMW

Sorry all of your groceries have doubled in price, but our data shows inflation isn't that bad, so vote blue!

I don't have the answers. Then again, coming up with ways for Dems to suck less isn't my job. Pretty sure they pay people for that. Then again, those folks are employed and make decent money, so this all likely seems perfectly fine to them. Hopefully it continues to be that way on November 6th. For all our sakes.

[the-firebird69]

TSA director arrested by US Customs and Border Protection (msn.com)

and a real relative an they care for him. and it is real. and the reative said no no way you wont charge them is ignored. and wont say it no does to the media.and it is to reduce power of the minortiy morlock and other minoritie it began about two weeks ago adnd both morlock macs do it. and we see them getting more and more angry. and will come to ahead shortly

Thor Freya

and what head is this

mike tew

you dont knonw too bad none we use the inflamatory language on you lol to piss you off

Thor Freya

ok ok i t is out and they pout it there and will try stuff. and moreso the big one there and all his and others and we see. it starts so what they hit us.

mike t

and ok you louse they will stream in later this blows

mac daddy

you side with them

mike t

i supppose childish comes to mind i know mac daddyannd he is implicit inexplaining it and to you and ohters to avoid confusinand haveing to repeat it. and you ahve details why and thien this your on theri side and such what gives here is this really maury povitch

Zues Hera

we say it it is said here we are childish. and we see why he says why. points it out we dont listn nd disagree. so you will not post

mike t

ahahaah lol ok loser you shrink well join john r in your disdain of all others as you did anyways when i was young your a burnt out ahole anwyas. drunk and loser. and it shows. and yeh your childish and an idiot. a real one. mentally ill. and retarded. slow. and you are gong to be h it due ot it and as achild you dont stand much of achance

Zues Hera

and he s drunk and stupid. loses and drinks. and thinks it will work out i will fix it and no they wont listen. tear us to ribbons. as thy reuing tons of alliacnes iw roked on this blows for real.im out they say and say it all day long regardless and yeh are mean children. f them.

mac daddy

you fuck off mike t as i told you too or your dead. and we have your knife ok fucker. you were threatning me and said it was due to bs. and that means bullsht. and look up a llist o f morlock anacronysms and abreviations study ok moron. you started this too with your own your headcheese crap. dont get it and saw it daily the macs are trmendous. and f u shithead by the way i sue you for the business you stole from my dad. and now too we file it

Zues Hera

and we do that and many more and the rolls royce compnay he has shares and fifty percent we whaleon him and pull it out of his hands and he stopped productin is a shitty asshole now. mean loser. and llost tons of bases this go around. we file the lawsuit shortly and you ahd mail but ok. we do this. it is important to him. and douglas hated him for it let him in he is alone. a nd not mean. hates macs. and no. wont. you niether wrote him out. on the spot. and after you helped. and we sue for abuse at oconnor. ten big ones. under paid. by a lot and 100k th going raate holding his 401k and refused to let him have it and said he was mentally ill on the phone our son said you cant say that. no. and not deemed by court and have no body executing it is illegal. they said your fired then and he says i left already you try it the ypursue you. no it is mine. and laura said it and she is gone no is ellie yes. and a bitch loser. we press chrges too these people suck all around. now occonnor said to and he said thisgues you have no choice she said right. hung up. and told occonnor he said it was illegal. and then out then and fired her. and our son said charges willb e brought and a real live lawsuit not my clan dope and ncie hair shit. and he got mad and tired for the unemployment and uh uh ahhh and wasck...and wak. and sad it traitor and wack fo that. and tons hate you fag. we took tons of money due to it and told hm how much for a few dollrs. hated the fact you had him pay the hotel used him too they hated him ini the car. did not pay wouldnt and out then. and regrated it no held it on our son. laughed when ti left and he said yeh ok puke your an ass. let others grow who use you for food i laugh at yo have a plan you dont. he left angry said it today the fr aid it and why..him thats why. and they said it you fn blow drunk shit. and hit him and now his hate him yup. tons do it. and justin he was worseno helped a bit said he is a fag asshole. he says ken and justin we take over budget and he says no and will. and we do it no the boys wont. a nd so we shall. and it is budget renta and stoage. we use it too they dont do fulls ervice and uhaul does. we stop the taover and use it totake uhaul now too. and we sue to do it now too

Bitol and Goddess Wife

Olympus

[irisseireth]

I feel like I just left a toxic relationship