#under a cut because spoiler lena dies

[riveracheron]

eh. might as well post this now. a few of these are wish fulfillment rather than actual theorizing but explanations under the cut

i have an alchemy hyperfixation and all the alchemy stuff in tmagp makes me very excited so a lot of my theories are related to that

spoilers for the pilot btw

main character gets an eye injury - the image will not leave my head. in the magnus institute ruins statement there was this whole thing about redcanary having some kind of encounter with or experience with eye trauma and that feels like something thats just. gonna come up again

another mechanisms va - self explanatory, we need to complete the set. would love to hear kofi or rachel.

gwen has trauma related to something that happened with elias - this is going on the theory that she’s not elias’ counterpart, but a relative of some kind. something spooky happens to him and that pushes gwen to research the paranormal.

character referencing nicholas flamel - all the main characters have names that reference alchemists, and nicholas flamel is probably the most famous alchemist of all time. i doubt he’ll be given the smirke treatment because that kinda already happened with the transphobic wizard books, but someone could be sharing his name.

mag 114 statement is relevant - thats the. hill top road statement that deals with other realities, and anya (the statement giver) could be from the protocol verse. we could totally hear about the aftermath of her departure

alice/sam/gwen = three primes - the three main alchemical symbols on the OIAR crest, and a good sort of symbolic trio sorter. the three peimes are salt, sulphur and mercury, and are the basis for alchemy. the down to earth, reliable salt, the firey, unpredictable sulfur, and the adaptable, easygoing mercury. i think these could apply i just want to have it called out in universe

lena is a good person - i don’t think they’d pull the evil boss thing twice. i just think lena’s weird mannerisms are from her autistic swag

celia is related to or is agnes - (related to as in. her story involves agnes, not that shes like. a sister.) this comes from a theory by @/pinklotjeart, i think. basically: through the way her death was described (spark returned to the lightless flame) and some timeline discrepancies and general avatarness making it weird, agnes might not be Dead dead. and celia’s counterpart, lynne - well, she saw a fire ghost. also, both her and agnes are the only non one-off characters who have shakespeare names afaik. agnes MONTAGUE, celia from as you like it…

annabelle cane is related somehow - self explanatory, she was at hilltop road when everything went down. might have been pulled in.

a famous alchemist is robert smirke’d - self explaining, give me more canon historical figures jonny

another kitty cat - i want more kitty in podcast is that a crime

augustus is not jonah - we hear jonah’s voice as ben meredith in 193, so im skeptical that tim fearon’s character is jonah for that reason.

oiar group has a messy moment that devolves into actual physical violence - mmm angst i think they deserve to smack eachother around a bit

bonzo cult - yeah.

oiar found family - we got the group of coworkers that hate each other angst last time gimme the “hurting one to get to the others” and self sacrifice angst this time

colin dies early - mmmm i cant say much about this bc its based on one throwaway line at the MCM panel where jonny doesn’t mention colin in the main character group. so . death flags.

oiar is containing the entities scp style - this was a super early theory of mine, either this or theyre using them for power or energy in some way. even more heavy handed capitalism metaphors yay

someone gets ushanka’d - its computer horror: the podcast. that’s all

cookbook statement - a few clues in the ARG had to do with cookbooks, and alex and jonny have already said they’re getting weird with the statement formats (they mentioned an insurance report!) so. cookbook doesn’t seem too far-fetched

tiktoker/influencer character - archives was 2010s and they had a podcaster and youtuber, which were like. the big things. whats the hip trend now??? instagram and tiktok baybee

protocol editors va a small role a la mag 100 or the wtgfs cult - those characters were voiced by other rq team members (ie helen as laverne and martyn as robin) and the team has since expanded!! some editors dis stuff for cry havoc, so im guessing nico, annie, april and others will get a small role!

a villain’s goal is creating the philosopher’s stone or other alchemical thing - tmagp is heavily inspired by alchemy, and the philosopher’s stone was the main goal of alchemy!! it would grant you eternal knowledge snd the ability to turn lead into gold- which seems like a good. evil dude’s ambition

the desolation gets more focus - the institute burned down, the oiar crest has a lot of sulfur symbols (the fire element), alchemy as a whole having to do with fire, celia and her connection- it paints a very. lightless flame picture

trip to germany - a lot of the arg was set in and around berlin, and there was that exchange between sam and colin about german in the pilot! i could see a germany trip happening in the same way jon took a trip to china and america.

[bonzos-number-1-fan]

TMAGP 13 Thoughts: Phone Bug

A big episodes for small reasons. Not much world-shaking happened but just enough was said about just the right things. A lot to get into in this one around the incident. We're starting to have the curtain pulled back. Just a crack right now, but that's just more reason to be cracked.

Spoilers for episode 13, and all of TMA, below the cut.

Not a huge amount to touch on in the date portion of the episode other than a couple of sentences. Yeah, Sam is a gifted burn out that's sad about not getting experimented on. Same old same old. But Celia has a baby. Jack being Celia's kid I wasn't expecting mostly because of how that figures into her timeline. She's very heavily implied to be TMA's Celia but based on what she said if she is then she's been in TMP's universe for at least 4 years. A "couple of wild years" and Jack's "just over a year old". Plus 9 months and it's a lot longer than it might've appeared. None of that stuff tripped Freddy's possible lie detector either that I heard.

If you work under the assumption that the voices are who most people think, and they started roughly when they arrived, then that's a fairly major time discrepancy. The voices are about a year old but Celia has been around for 4.

However, it doesn't strictly rule that out either. Firstly, we know that moving between universes isn't actually one-to-one time-wise. Anya Villette went backwards 2 weeks when she crossed over. So them arriving at different times could support the idea that she's TMA's Celia further. Her general explanation of events could also be explained by this too. If she's not there willingly, or is there willingly but it didn't quite go to plan, a couple of wild years while you get your footing in a world you don't belong to isn't far fetched. If she was there looking for the voices then her showing up so relatively late could be explained by her baby too. So it's certainly not a dead and buried theory yet.

While Jack isn't Jack Barnabas he and the voices are about the same age. If people want to go rabid over that.

Gwen and Lena's little chat has a similar amount to really dig into. It's nice to see Gwen dealing with it all, and it's annoying we still don't know who died, but Lena does have a lot to say in a few words.

The world is full of opposing forces, some benevolent, most not. In order for the wheels to keep on turning, all these forces need to be monitored and balanced. That is where we come in.

This probably the most information we've had on the OIAR to this point from the show itself. I think most of this was safely assumed before this point. They've been doing a lot of monitoring, categorisation, and the only responses we have seen have been tamping major spikes down. A world of opposing forces is also a given. We are being led to believe that these are analogous to the 14+1 but there being benevolent ones if that's true is a big mix up. If you take the above timeline idea a step further and say the 14+1 arrived much earlier (or it doesn't matter because of how they're temporally weird) the benevolent ones could be native to TMP. They could be all TMP had.

Her assertion that the OIAR is a balance on these forces is interesting. Beyond the obvious stuff it also leans into an idea I've been throwing about regarding Starkwall. In the perception of Starwall might not really be the whole picture. The San Pedro Square massacre could've been an easy scapegoat to pin on them for the OIAR to split with them. A split caused by a disagreement in ethics. Starkwall thus far hasn't been shown to have an incredible disregard for human life based on Ep 7. The OIAR definitely has been. It could just be a PR move because the massacre was too big to contain but that feels like the least interesting way to handle this. A faction that's all in on monster hit men splitting with a faction who is against it has more room for interesting drama and worldbuilding IMO.

Balance was also a very large aspect of TMA in the end. The OIAR working towards that balance isn't as noble a goal as it might sound. Or it at least has the potential to be an incredibly misguided goal.

Okay, with all that mostly out of the way onto the incident itself. I enjoy this one a fair bit. Very different to what's come before it but with another recurring theme. We're starting to see a couple of patterns emerge now although it's too early to start naming things. I don't think there is a lot to really get into but this one was written by Alex, had a new VA, and was a recurring idea. Which does all point to this being quite important as these things go. All the episodes will likely tie up quite nicely in the end but this one seems quite relevant currently. In any case this was a fun one and I'm kinda curious how some of the elements within it will tie together. Mainly the gambling and insects.

Also, super weird they went with Zorrotrade for this. Because that's a real thing. Or was a real thing? It might be dead now, but still.

Post-incident chat has nothing I really want to comment on. More Alice and Sam is always good, even if Alice is trying really hard to not seem very upset.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Incident/CAT#R#DPHW Master Sheet

DPHW Theory: 4622 doesn't seem particularly noteworthy. It's interesting from a thematic angle how this differs from Rolling With It. Both obviously very linked to gambling but this one lacks the compulsion elements. Which is a good indicator that H is linked to that sort of thing. Not that I need to convince myself of that further.

CAT# Theory: 3. Insert screams et cetera, et cetera. More seriously there still isn't a convincing pattern to this. Although I might be swinging back to my original tria prima and/or triple deity interpretation.

R# Theory: B is where I was thinking it'd end up while listening. So that's nice. Not much to add to this. Much like with DPHW the more information that lines up with the theory the less there is to talk about it because I've already done the hard bit.

Header talk: Gambling (Application) -/- Murder. Other than Application being a pretty weird Subsection I'm not sure there is much to dig into here. Although it does likely confirm he's dead. Which does make it a little strange that his statement wasn't read by one of the Freddy lot.

[miqolena]

My first-final thoughts on Dawntrail

My opinions and spoilers for the entirety of 7.0 under the cut.

Overall I enjoyed this expansion immensely. There was no point at which I thought to myself, "I can't wait for this part to be over," or "This is really dull," or "I want to move on to the next thing right now." There was no character I did not enjoy and feel at least something small for. Characters I kind of didn't like initially (Bakool Ja Ja mostly) ended up being some of the characters that I loved most. Wuk Lamat was a joy in her development. I wasn't annoyed by her initial faults and I liked that she retained some of them even at the end, after she had grown so immensely. Zoraal Ja's dimensions were revealed a little late into the game, but I had already sort of gotten a notion of them by the time that happened, so I didn't mind, and I find the idea of struggling with the legacy someone leaves you with the best of intentions to be really compelling. I adored Gulool Ja Ja to pieces. And Wuk Eva. And literally everyone else. I'm serious, there's no one I didn't like.

The area that affected me most was Living Memory, and if that was like kicking me in the shin, then Heritage Found was the winding back of the leg. I have dealt with my own losses in life and the whole thing with reusing souls and resurrecting people and preserving them based on their memories was grotesque to me. My loved ones are gone, and we had wonderful relationships and I loved them dearly, but I would never want to speak to them again. Because they are dead and should stay that way. But the scene with Wuk Lamat speaking her last words to Namikka was terribly upsetting because I couldn't help imagining the things I would say to my loved ones if I could see them again. It struck home with painful precision and there were tears.

The themes of love, legacy, war, redemption, death, and loss were poignant to me, and I think they were handled really well.

As for the encounter design, the dungeons were fairly difficult but I never died in a Trust run, so they must not have been too hard. Same with the trials. I can see myself doing these things over and over again without getting too tired of it for the next two or so years. The single player duties were great except for the one QTE in the duel with Gulool Ja Ja, which stressed my hands to the point of forcing me to take a break for a few hours.

For gathering, I appreciate the new action Revisit that the game added to the two gatherers, it's always exciting when it procs. Fisher seems to be sitting pretty too. I haven't done all of them yet but so far the Wachumeqimeqi quests have been great, and I haven't done any of the role quests yet, so no opinions there. For crafting, I haven't really delved into the potential of the new actions, but I know they're probably going to shake up the game a little.

Music was spot on as usual. The game's graphical update has done wonders for the visuals as well. I'm lucky in that I'm completely enamored with Lena's updated appearance; a lot of people aren't so happy. I hope that their concerns can be addressed over time.

This might be new expansion smell filling my head, but I think Dawntrail might be my favorite. I can't wait to see where they're going with this, the aftermath to the threads they made in the MSQ. I want more of these characters and places and I know I'm going to get it, and that's the most comforting feeling.

As for fic, though… I think it's going to be hard to put Gaius in there with Lena. The entire first half the WoL is providing a role of mentorship for Wuk Lamat and I'm going to have to think really hard about how I write the MSQ so that Gaius is there and not just nodding his head and going 🧍‍♂️. There are a few moments when I was playing where I thought to myself "Gaius could respond to this with something relevant to his character," like for example when Zoraal Ja remarks that the Empire was full of idiots, but those were just a few moments. It'll be hard to fit him in with the rest of it and depict the MSQ in a way that's both not boring/retreading what viewers have already seen to much while still getting the information of the plot AND my changes across. We'll see how it goes. I'm not super hankering to start, so we'll see when I get to that.

That's all. See you ingame!

[karalovesallthegirls]

“I believe in this city,” she begins just as the world explodes.

The force of it throws her forward and through her podium. Everything is burning, she might be burning, although she can’t think much beyond the smoke around her and ringing in her ears. Her face is pressed down into muck and from her position she can just make out the flaming remains of the stage, the L Corp logo melting down its slabs. 

She blinks repeatedly, trying to clear the dust from her watering eyes, tries to wipe it away with hands that won’t seem to listen. Nothing hurts, not yet at least, but she can’t make herself move. Then the world is spinning and she’s greeted with the most welcome sight: Kara, crouching over her, dirty but alive. “I’m so glad you're okay,” she wants to say, tries to say, but she’s barely getting air into her lungs as is and her body doesn’t want her using any of it elsewhere. Kara is saying words she cannot hear above the ringing and she keeps looking at Lena’s chest in horror. Lena tries to lean forward a bit to see what she’s so worried about, but Kara pushes her back down. The ringing really is quite loud; Lena would much rather listen to the panicked sounds of Kara’s voice than the continual hum of what is likely some level of hearing loss. Kara presses her hand to Lena’s chest though she can’t feel it, and when she pulls her hand back Lena can see it’s covered in blood. Ah. That explains the panic. Another explosion hits, and Kara falls forward and over Lena protectively. A deep stinging sensation has begun to creep into the buzzing silence. Her eyes roll a bit, uncooperative, and that is when she catches sight of the heavily armed man skulking their way.

Lena feels, appropriately enough, all the blood drain from her face at once, and she tries in vain to push Kara away, to scream, to make any sort of sound or movement aside from a frantic glance back and forth. Somehow, Kara understands to look, and her entire body seems to tighten up at the sight. Instead of running like Lena so dearly wanted her to do, the foolish girl stands as if to shield Lena from her assassin.

Lena is fading so fast - she can feel it every small wheeze that hits her lungs - and oh god, she can’t watch Kara die. Kara dying in front of her would be the ultimate hell. Maybe she’s already dead, maybe this is her afterlife where she will spend eternity reliving this nightmare. Her fingertips are numb.

Lena can see the man lifting the rifle and she can feel the animalistic scream that tears from her throat. She sees her dear Kara blocking her with her own body like she’s not already dead, like she’s worth sacrificing it all for, and Lena thinks she may still be screaming when the shooter fires his rapid burst but she knows she’s silent when Kara is still there unmoved, unfazed.

Maybe this really is her death dream, because Kara is still very much alive as she stalks over to him. Flings him away like he’s weightless, twists his gun into a bow. She turns back to look at Lena, and it becomes abundantly clear that the shooter did hit her - with many rounds, in fact, as her shirt hangs in tattered shreds and the floor sits littered with crumbled bullets. And there clear as day where blood should be there is blue, the red on her chest only from that iconic symbol.

Lena closes her eyes and laughs a blood-thick laugh, coughs, barely feels the tears that drip down into the mud she is dying in.

Kara Danvers is Supergirl.

thank god thank god thank god

Lena can die now. It hits her all at once, this acceptance. There is this moment of realization when you’re at the end of what the most important thing is, and Lena knows now that that which matters most will be safe. Even at the hardest moments, it’ll make it through. It’s bulletproof.

Someone is touching her, she realizes, though the touch feels miles away. Kara is there, beautiful Kara, and she’s crying and her tears are dropping on to Lena’s face and Lena wants to tell her it’s okay, everything is okay now because Kara is Supergirl.

She’s a superhero.

Kara is yelling, pleading, pawing at the body that’s no longer hers. The dark is engulfing her now, and it’s warm and quiet and she’s so, so happy. What a balm it is to know that her love will be safe without her. How lucky is she to love a thing death cannot touch.

[breitzbachbea]

How about you…talk about the thematic cannibalism 👀👀👀

Okay this is technically bigass huge spoilers but idc bc a the pace I am writing, anyone who read this might as well will have forgotten it by now. I'll just elaborate on the tags of this post under the cut, basically:

(TW Child abuse and domestic abuse, better safe than sorry)

And by elaborate I mean ramble. Buckle up.

The overarching arc of LFLS is Michele and his relationship with his father Salvatore. There is also more than enough songs about Michele being haunted and hounded by his trauma and his subsequent fall from grace on my playlist for him. (AND the playlist is called "A Sheep In Wolf's Clothing" - By donning the predator's skin, he is still devoured by the predator, he thinks he escapes the wolf by eating other sheep, but he is inside of the wolf's skin because he is in his stomach 👁👁)

Salvatore terrorized the European underground without remorse. He was ABSOLUTELY infamous with the parent generation and the infamity lives on. Michele is constantly being reminded of his father, is treated with wariness and hostility because of what his father did. He is compared to his father. Dionysus of Palermo, The Scourge of Europe, Caesar, most places where Michele goes, his father will already have been there to greet him. (Note: Oh, it'll be great in the rewrite because Aaron O'Connell kept out of most the going ons on the continent; Paddy never met Salvatore nor really knows what he did. Harry and Charlie have zero idea about him, so Paddy is a bit wary about Michele from the start but not wary enough to pass it on to Harry and Charlie. Does not help with Paddy then continueing to be wary because Michele is wary of him, because he inherently distrusts father figures --)

Because Michele has 18 years of fucking baggage!!! I like to say he lived with his own murderer under one roof for 18 years!!! Wouldn't still be alive if his mother wouldn't have loved him that much!!! Salvatore terrorized Europe and he terrorized his own son. He quickly grew jealous of his own child, since Maria (his wife, Michele's Mamma), loved him so much. Her own family had thrown her out after finding out who she was dating, Salvatore's parents were cold people (Michele's grandmother Lena barely spoke any Sicilian as she was from Crete and had to give up her career as a musician by marrying his grandfather Giovanni), so she only felt loved by Salvatore. Who made sure he'd be the only one for her by gaslighting her and reminding her that she has no one else to go to. He loves her. No one else does.

So suddenly he has to share the love with another person and he can't stand it. Beats Michele for any pretense he can find. When Maria yells at him to stop and puts her foot down ... he doesn't do it around her anymore, but by no means does he stop. Tells Michele if he tells his mother, he'll get another beating for it. So Michele lies to her and lies to everyone else. Everyone else he can lie to. (I think Herakles is the only other person who Knows, due to these two only meeting when their fathers did).

So Salvatore dies and Michele wants to forget it all. It's over, he is gone and no one can ever know it happened. if no one knows, it didn't happen. He locks up his father's old office and never opens it again. (That locked door in Irish Problems that the twins are so desperately curious about? Yeah). He never tells Marco and Lorenzo, who he raises, about it.

But how can he run if the whole goddamn world reminds him of his father? Compares him to him? How can he ever erase Salvatore from his life when for other people, they're one and the same? (Salvatore - The Salvator, an ephithet for Jesus; Michele - The archangel whose name means "Who is like God?" [BTW none of this was intentional, I am just finding accidental metaphors in my own text because I am the giant rat who makes all the rules and GODDAMN am I fucking genius])

So he tries to accumulate power. He wants to replace Salvatore's name with his own. No one will talk about Salvatore Vento anymore when Michele Vento is so much more present in everyone's minds. He's just gotta eclipse his father, he just gotta establish connections, he just gotta shut people up and then his mind will shut up too and he'll be at peace and if Salvatore is gone he will no longer be broken.

And because he has repressed everything about his father so deeply, he does not recognize that he becomes him. (Remember Febe Masi, the older Italian subordinate? Michele looks exactly like his father, except for his eyes. Those golden eyes are the ones of his mother Maria ... but in the shadows, they are deer brown. Like Salvatore's. That one was actually on purpose but of course it was on purpose, you probably noticed how often it was referenced). He is so fixated on his goal, that everything will be great and perfect for him and his family, that he hurts his family on the way there. Megalomania consumes him and he is ready to sacrifice a good now, to hurt Marco, Lorenzo, Harry, Soph, Charlie, Paddy, to strip them of their autonomy for a better future. An unattainable one. Of course it comes crashing down.

So much for the basis. Ingredients are here, let's serve you some human stew.

Michele loves to cook. His kitchen is his safe haven, because it was his mother's realm. Maria loves Michele more than herself and Michele loves his mother more than himself. She taught him how to cook and she turned part of the Garden into a veggie and fruit patch. (Michele's greatgrandfather Luigi built the mansion he lives in and not being a good Sicilian at all, had a garden that was just there to look pretty. Salvatore doesn't give a shit about his ancestors or pretense, so if his beloved Maria wants a Veggie Patch. Sure). After Salvatore dies, he realizes one day that NO ONE is stopping him from turning the whole garden into a growing patch and orchard. So he does just that. So Michele harvests and cooks. He prepares food to eat. He's the one in control. He's the knife. He's the devourer. He is so afraid of being devoured, he rather devours others before they can eat him. He has been cannibalized and thusly HE cannibalizes others!!! He's so chewed up he can only imitate what he has been through!!! His teeth only know how to gnaw, his lips not how to kiss!!!

And. For the Ancient Greek Myth Parallels. I am pretty sure that Kronos ate his children because it was prophesized that his own son would kill him and take his place. But he doesn't eat Zeus bc his mother Rhea does a switcharoo and Zeus does end up killing him and taking his place. (Or doesn't kill him, Kronos = Saturn. I love Roman Syncretism, bc the jarring differences are the fun in syncretism!!! I don't want to hear any buhu the romans copied the greeks jokes they're unfunny. get in the syncretism and what it tells us about the cultures, their values and their intercultural exchanges with each other car). Zeus receives a similiar prophecy that a son by Metis would kill him - So he ABSORBS her while pregnant and that is how we end up getting Athene being birthed from his skull. Zeus defeats and punishes his father for cannibalizing his siblings ... and THEN CANNIBALIZES HIS LOVER BECAUSE HE HEARD OF A PROPHECY ONE OF HIS CHILDREN WOULD KILL HIM. THE (NEARLY) DEVOURED HAS BECOME THE DEVOURER!!!

Salvatore is Kronos who cannibalized his own son and completely engulfed him ... and the son tries to avoid the same fate as his father ... he is NOT his father ... but to avoid the same fate, he cannibalizes his loved ones ... He is SO scared that he becomes the cannibal, he is so OBSESSED with the cannibal because of the trauma he inflicted of him that THIS is what turns him into a cannibal!!! He's so afraid that he'll have to eat human flesh that he never turns the light on and oops, at night all cats are grey and pork tastes like man anyways!!!

Anyways. LFLS is about Cannibalism now. I am the giant rat who makes all the rules. (Give me a good night's sleep/Someone buy me this book by Georges Bataille and I will tell you why Sadık and Herakles should eat each other). I do have a Ko-Fi under the same name (Breitzbachbea) so if anyone wanna paypal a hoe 10 dollars so I can buy this---

[sleepykittypaws]

Celebrate the Olympic Spirit

Sure, the Olympics aren’t a holiday, per se, but the every-four-year, or two if you count both Summer and Winter editions separately, massive international sporting events sure seems like a reason to celebrate, especially given their recent, unprecedented delay. And what better way to get into the Games mood, than by watching a sports movie?

Here are my favorite motivating, inspirational, and aspirational tales of athletic derring do…

Favorite Sports Movies

The Cutting Edge (1992) - This figure skating romance was released around the 1992 Olympics, and actually name-checks that year's winter host city, Albertville, more than once.  It's not good in the traditional sense of great storytelling or athletic veracity, but I loved it so very much I saw it three times in the theater as a teen. Watching it at some point during every Winter Games is a tradition for me so, yeah, I can’t help it, I love this silly sports movie/romance, which also features a bit of holiday feels.

Wimbledon (2004) - It's a rom-com. It's a sports movie. It's a rom-com sports movie that really should be better known. Notting Hill but set at tennis' best-known event. Paul Bettany and Kristen Dunst have surprisingly great chemistry, and there's more sports-related tension than you'd think.

Friday Night Lights (2004) - A football movie for people who don't really like football. a.k.a. 🙋‍♀️. The TV series it spawned is also brilliant (”Clear Eyes, Full Hearts,” indeed), and well worth a watch, but the original movie, starring Billy Bob Thornton, is, honestly, a masterpiece. Definitely Peter Berg's best work and the original book, written by Berg's cousin, Buzz Bissinger, is a great read.

Muriel's Wedding (1994) - You mean you forgot this Australian export, which made Toni Collette a star, was a sports movie? Yep, one of my all-time favorite movies, of any genre, this absolutely brilliant, ABBA-soaked comedy is not only a girls-night go-to, but also a stealth Olympic sport classic.

Remember the Titans (2000) - OK, football isn't in the Olympics, but it sure does make for a good sports movie setting. Even if this early 1970s-set story is most definitely Disney-fied, Denzel Washington, Will Patton, Ryan Gosling and a baby Hayden Panettiere really sell this sort-of true story.

Invictus (2009)-Rugby isn't an Olympic sport, or even one most Americans know much about, but this Matt Damon-led, Clint Eastwood-directed, based-on-a-true-story tale made me care about a sport I'd only tangentially knew even existed before watching.

Hoosiers (1986)-I grew up in Indiana so, by law, I have to include this basketball classic on any "best of" sports movie lists. Also, it actually is really very good.

Rudy (1993)-Ditto the above. But, again, it's hard not to root for Sean Astin (and Jon Favreau!) in this love letter to the Fighting Irish. Plus, there’s no better scavenger hunt task or TikTok challenge than going into a bar and convincing a patron to allow you to put them on your shoulders and march around chanting, 'Rudy, Rudy, Rudy.' 

Miracle (2004) - Given how much more popular the Summer Olympics are, it's weird that the Winter Games seem to get all the good movies made about them, but this Kurt Russell-led true tale is another Disney sports movie classic.

McFarland, USA (2015) - Disney, and Kevin Costner, just really know how to make a sports movie, damn it! This movie made me care about cross country for which it, too, could have carried the title Miracle.

A League of Their Own (1992)-The best baseball movie ever. Yeah, I said what I said. Tom Hanks, Geena Davis, Lori Petty—even Madonna and Rosie O'Donnell are making it work. 1992 was a weirdly great year for sports movies.

Moneyball (2011) - A movie about baseball, and math, and yet it's also great, I swear. In addition to all of the above, it's also a stealth Christmas movie and maybe Chris Pratt's best non-Marvel, movie role.

Creed (2015) - This surprisingly effective Rocky reboot starring Michael B Jordan as Apollo Creed's illegitimate son has spawned its own movie series which, in many ways, exceeds the original Rocky franchise.

Rocky Balboa (2006) - Maybe it's because I was a toddler when the original Rocky came out, so only saw the ever-worse sequels as a kid, but this mid-aughts return to the character for Sylvester Stallone, as both writer and actor, is a triumph.

Eddie the Eagle (2016) - That Hugh Jackman features in as many movies (spoiler alert) on this list as Kevin Costner surprised me, too. This story of the English ski jumper who became infamous for being, well, less than golden, is one of those non-Olympic triumph stories that really works. If you're going to watch one underdog-at-the-Games movie, I definitely prefer this this to the more ubiquitous Cool Runnings.

Love & Basketball (2000) - Only because I'm an anglophile is this great, chemistry-filled Sanaa Lathan and Omar Epps college basketball romance not my favorite sports-movie-meets-rom-com.

I, Tonya (2017) - Margot Robbie and a nearly unrecognizable Sebastian Stan are perfectly cast in this sarcastic, highly stylized look at the Tonya Harding scandal.

Pride (2007) - Apparently I like this swimming movie, which I think almost no one saw, better than critics, but I found this 1970s-set, Terrence Howard-Bernie Mac-starring story of inner city kids excelling in the pool emotional and entertaining.

Field of Dreams (1989) - This Kevin Costner magical realism baseball classic is often goofy and imminently tease-worthy and yet…It also works. Maybe it's no surprise that someone who loves cheesy Christmas movies as much as I do would have a soft spot for Field of Dreams.

42 (2013) - Chadwick Boseman is absolutely fantastic as legend Jackie Robinson. One of those movies that's ostensibly about baseball, but is really about so much more, except not in a pretentious way.

Race (2016) - Before Jason Sudeikis was Ted Lasso, he was famed track coach Larry Synder in this Jesse Owens biopic that is far from perfect, but still important. Plus, I honestly don't think Stephan James got enough credit for his relatively nuanced portrayal of Owens.

Goon (2011) - This overlooked gem starring Sean William Scott as a semi-pro hockey player whose main skill is his ability to take, and dole out, a beating, is surprisingly great.

Real Steel (2011) - This is a robot-boxing movie starring Hugh Jackman that is basically Rocky meets Over the Top—and yet it's actually really good. Yeah, I was surprised, too.

Forget Paris (1995) - OK, so maybe Billy Crystal playing an NBA referee doesn't really make this a sports movie, but it does begin and end (spoiler alert) at real NBA games, and I will die on the hill that this rom-com co-starring Debra Winger is wildly under-rated.

Bend it like Beckham (2002) - This girl-power sports movie has some highly questionable romantic dynamics (the coach is their love interest???) but this Parminder Nagra-Keira Knightley movie is also a heckuva sports movie and an inspiring immigrant story.

Bonus Pick: The Apple TV+ series Ted Lasso is one of the best things I watched in 2020, and I'm sure of that, because I watched it twice since, just to be sure. Jason Sudekis is absolutely perfect as an American college football coach taking over a UK Premier League team. This sweet show with a heart of gold is smart, funny, and absolutely impossible not to love—even for a cynic such as myself.

More Sports Movies Worth Watching

For someone not very into sports, I am, apparently, into watching movies about sports, so while not a comprehensive listing of the entire, vast genre, here are a few more suggestions I personally think are worth watching.

The Miracle Season (2018) - This movie about high school volleyball champs whose star player dies suddenly stars Helen Hunt and is a lot better than you'd think based on its tiny budget and, honestly, fairly small story. Just missed making my Top 25.

The Way Back (2020) - This Ben Affleck as a drunken high school basketball coach movie is a lot better than expected. Released just as the pandemic kicked into high gear, it was overlooked last year, but worth seeking out.

Fighting with My Family (2019) - Does it count if it's a show, not a sport? Either way (but that's why this isn't in my Top 25), this stealth Christmas movie/love letter to the WWE is a lot better than it ever needed to be thanks to some really great performances from Florence Pugh, Lena Headey and directer Stephen Merchant. Even The Rock reins it in.

Warrior (2011) - You couldn't pay me to watch an actual UFC bout, but this Tom Hardy story of (literally) battling brothers is incredibly compelling and well done.

Win Win (2011) - This movie isn't really enough about wrestling, even though its ostensibly centered around the sport, to make it into my Top 25, but it's still really good, and Amy Ryan gives an outstanding performance.

Fever Pitch (2005) - Drew Barrymore and Jimmy Fallon star in this remake of a UK film whose ending they had to shift when the Red Sox unexpectedly won the World Series.

Fever Pitch (1997) - This Colin Firth-starring, Arsenal-centered original is much smaller, more realistic and arguably better than the big budget Barrymore-Fallon redux.

We are Marshall (2006) - A real-life sports tragedy made into a sports-movie tearjerker starring Matthew McConaughy. And my tears were very much jerked by the end.

Coach Carter (2005) - Samuel L Jackson plays real-life basketball coach Ken Carter and, because it's a Disney movie, doesn't use the F-word even once. Now that's a feat worthy of its own sports movie.

Invincible (2006) - Yes, it's Mark Wahlberg, and another based-on-a-true-story, Disney sports movie that hits all the cliches, but dang it, that works on me. It just does.

Glory Road (2006) - If you're sensing a theme with me and Disney sports movies…Well, you're not wrong. This look at the first all-Black starting lineup at the 1966 NCAA Final Four does, unfortunately, center white coach Don Haskins, played by Josh Lucas (though I always mis-remember it as Josh Charles), making the important story it tells less than what it should be, but it still mostly works.

Million Dollar Arm (2014) - Admittedly one of the lesser Disney sports movie entries, and another that centers a white guy in a film mostly about people of color (not a great look), this Jon Hamm movie about a scout seeking an Indian cricket star who can make it in the Major Leagues still mostly worked for me.

The Mighty Ducks (1992) - One of the few movies on this list aimed directly at kids, this beloved peewee hockey saga actually is cute, and mostly does hold up.

Cool Runnings (1993) - Kind of shocked this movie that is part White Savior-movie and part-wacky kids movie essentially making fun of a real group of athletes of color came out in 1993 and not 1973, but the earnest charm of John Candy and a general Disney gloss keep this from being totally unwatchable and mostly just mildly, rather than extremely, offensive. Not really recommending, but feels like it belongs on an Olympic movie list.

Nadia (1984) - This made-for-TV, mostly true biopic, starring Talia Balsam as Nadia Comaneci, was a Disney Channel staple in that network’s early days. 

Munich (2005) - It's a movie with the Olympics very much at its heart—namely the 1972 Israeli athlete hostage tragedy—that isn't really about the Olympics at all, but this Steven Spielberg-directed movie about national revenge is compelling, if problematic if you think about it for too long.

American Anthem (1986) - Is this Mitch Gaylord-Mrs. Wayne Gretzky (a.k.a Janet Jones) starring movie good, realistic and/or well-written? No, no and none of the above. But did I still watch it 8,000 times as a kid on HBO? Yes. Yes, I did.

Men with Brooms (2002) - Once, on a business trip to Canada, my husband was stuck in a hotel that only got three channels, and one of them always seemed to be showing curling, which actually got him weirdly into this obscure sport. This movie wasn't quite as fun as I hoped, but it's still a mostly charming, if slight, Canadian classic.

Unbroken (2014) - The harrowing and incredible real-life story of Louis Zamperini deserved better than this Angelina Jolie-directed movie delivered, but it's still a serviceable version of a worthy tale.

Chariots of Fire (1981) - I remember being bored out of my mind by this movie trying to watch this movie on cable as a kid, but no denying that, if nothing else, the score is iconic and indelibly linked to sports-movie magic.

Without Limits (1998) - Jared Leto’s Prefontaine beat this one to the theaters, but this Billy Crudup-starring film is the better of the two movies about the life of running pioneer Steve Prefontaine. There’s also a 1995 documentary, Fire on the Track: The Steve Prefontaine Story.

Personal Best (1982) - Mariel Hemingway’s story of ambition at odds with love, is a sports and LGTBQ+ classic. 

Olympic Dreams (2019) - The story of how this small, meandering movie was made during the 2018 Winter Games is, unfortunately, more interesting than the movie itself, but there is some charm in watching Nick Kroll as an Olympic dentist making his way through the real Village, while interacting with real athletes.

Foxcatcher (2015) - This excellently-acted story is more true crime than sports inspiration, but if you're seeking a look at the dark side of the Games—and don’t want to turn on a doc like Athlete A—this is very dark tale indeed.

Seabiscuit (2003) - Every great athlete deserves to have their story told.

Any Given Sunday (1999) - Oliver Stone and Al Pacino take on pro Football. 'Nuff said.

The Replacements (2000) - I mean, the movie isn't amazing, but Keanu Reeves is super charming and Gene Hackman is always worth a watch.

The Program (1993) - Another bit of a dark-side-of-football take, worth it if only for the fantastic cast: James Caan, Halle Berry, Omar Eps, Joey Lauren Adams.

Everbody’s All-American (1988) - Not a movie I particularly love, but this Dennis Quaid-Jessica Lange football story that spans decades has always stuck in my memory.

Bull Durham (1988) - Just let Kevin Costner play actual baseball already.

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Reviews: Let’s Get Dangerous!

The Duck Knight Strikes Again as our Darkwing Double Feature concludes! Scrooge, the Kids and Launchpad visit the fair city of St. Canard. While Huey tries to work out how the seemingly world changing project Scrooge is financing for researcher Taurus Bulba .. um.. works, Launchpad and Dewey visit Drake, whose struggling to find any crime to actually fight, but soon finds himself tangled up in the case of a plucky young orphan, her missing grandfather and Bulba’s dark secrets and soon Darkwing and his new family find themselves the only three people standing between the world and it’s untimely end. Let’s Get Dangerous with a full review with recap and spoilers under the cut.

It’s time! I’ve been obviously, being a fan of both darkwing duck, if only finally watching it in full now, and superhero stories in general, and this show having told some REALLY good ones over the past 3 seasons including darkwing’s previous episode “The Duck Knight Returns!”, which I sadly didn’t get to in time before this episode. But this is a worthly replacement to conclude our double feature so it all works out. But yeah a big one hour special that changes the course of the season, brings Goslyn in, and brings in Darkwing’s old rogue’s gallery? Sign me up. And it’s also VERY clear that Disney has plans for a revivial/spinoff for darkwing. Besides this episode setting it up and Frank being very clear he has plenty of ideas for this big duckverse as a whole and is a massive fan of the series, there’s the fact Disney conspciously posted a trailer, 4 preview cilps (Though to their credit none really give the game away entirely and all but one take place in the first act, and the one that didn’t is so they could show off Stephanie Beatriz as Goslyn, which is fair enough). And if that werent’ enough, the killing stroke is that the episode is FREE TO WATCH on Disney Now, and likely on Youtube sometime soon given they usually do that when the make an episode readily avaliable as done with most series premires and, for some weird reason, the season 3 premire of big hero six. But wheras that’s probably just to drum up hype for an aging-ish series, this feels like a delberate move to drum up hype for the episode among both fans of the ducktales reboot and the old darkwing fanbase. The only way they could’ve been more transparent is if they put a giant sign at the end of the episode that says SPINOFF COMING SOON.. MAYBE.. DID YOU LIKE THIS? TWITTER US IF YOU LIKE THIS.. THAT’S THE RIGHT TERM RIGHT?. 

That being said I can’t blame them as Darkwing’s a beloved property, superheros are big right now thanks in large part to disney themselves with the MCU, and the fandom reactied with overwhelming praise to “The Duck Knight Returns!”, which is one of season 2′s best episodes even if the cliam that scrooge never went to the movies nor saw one on cable after 1938 is implausable at best and really dumb and I hate it at worst. I mean I get he wouldn’t love rising prises, but I seriously doubt Della wouldn’t have dragged him to one at some point or that someone wouldn’t of tried to get him to invest in theirs long before boorswan. It just dosen’t fit the character and it was dumb.. it’s also unrelated to this episode but I had pent up rage from preparing to review that episode and I might as well get it out of the way now. Point is this episode has a lot riding on it and had all the hype. So did it live up to it? Let’s take a look. 

We open in St. Canard, former wretched hive of scum and villiany and soon to be home to the second John Oliver Memorial Sewage Plant. Launchpad’s narrating and nearly getting everyone killed in a car accident as Scrooge argues with Bradford over the project Scrooge is on his way to see.. with the boys in two naturally. And since eveyrone else is missing and I had fun with it last time i’m assuming Webby is with Violet helping Lena with her burdgoening superhero career and trying to ask her out,  Beakly is tending to the house ,  Della and Penny are working out and trying not to admit there’s clear sexual tension and Donald is once again in the Pantry because he never learns. HE NEVER LEARNS. 

Anyways we learn their going to visit Tarus Bulba, in this continuity a famous and well loved scientist who I’m sure defintely won’t turn out to still be evil... yeshewillletsmoveon. Huey and Louie are excited about it because of Huey’s well established love of science and Louie smelling the money in a big inavation with Scrooge likely smelling both. As for Launchpad and Dewey their going to check in on Drake, whose living here now: Launchpad because he’s his best budy and possibly future boyfriend and Dewey because he needs more hits for his channel as he’s finally taken Dewey Dew Night to the masses. Bout time. Now he just needs a streaming deal. Make it happen Disney, D+ needs some animated series of it’s own. They also do a naturally terrible job of keeping the fact h’es a superhero a secret. We also breifly see drake doing a superhero dive before also comically tripping up and getting injured off screen. Cue.. Darkwing Colored ducktales logo as we don’t have time for the theme this week! And given this episode is an hour long that’s saying something.  Anyways Scrooge and the boys sans dewey head to meet Bulba whose a charming, gregarious man who quickly hugs the boys, puts them on his shoulders and snaps a selfie with the group. And he’s also familiar with the boys: Huey for wining the junior woodchuck science award and Louie for Louie Inc which ended before it’s time.. on public record. He’s a fan of both. And even given later reveals this seems genuine which I did not expect it to end up being anything resembling that. But we’ll get more into Bulba’s character when the time is right for now he shows off his invention: The Ramrod! While it shares the same name as Doctor Waddlemeyer’s device from the original, and as we’ll soon learn he made this one too, instead of a gravity device it instead can make ANYTHING you ask for, with Taruus wisely using Haggis to demonstrate. Huey however can’t help but wonder how it does what it does as surely what it makes has to come from somewhere though Louie tries to shut him up as he dosen’t want him to look a gifthorse in the mouth. I mean Horace gets self concious about it.  Meanwhile Launchpad and Dewey meet up with Drake at the reboot version of Darkwing Tower, where he’s set up nicely: Multiple costumes, gadgets, including arrows with his face on them, and the ratcatcher in all it’s glory. Seriously I do love motorcycles even if I’m terrified of riding one. It’s part of why yugioh 5d’s holds a special place in my heart despite card games on motorcylces being patently nuts.. but it’s in the best way possible. As for how Drake got this sweet setup turns out  Launchpad introduced him to Fenton who designed all his gadgets and presumibly his HQ as well as his snarky crime detecting and st.canard monitoring computer, W.A.N.D.A. Naturally he also is unaware he’s gizmoduck and freely shit talks gizmoduck again, though apparently Fenton does too. Granted Fenton could just be doing it to awkardly agree but it’s just as likely fenton uses it as an excuse to vent about his superhero alter ego, as we’ve seen that while Fenton loves being Gizmoduck he also resents it at time for keepiing him from doing science and getting glory just for punching people. But I love this dynamic, as Fenton’s just too nice for the old “they both hate each other and want the glory” dynamic to work, so Fenton untetionally pissing DW off as Gizmo but secretly supporting him as Darkwing is great and I can’t wait to see where this goes.  Before we get back to the main plot, and there is a LOT of it to get to, I just wanted to point out that Dewey seems an awful lot like drake.. i’m not saying he’s the boys father and Della simply didn’t knoow who it was mama mia style nor did she, in her more selfish form of 11 years ago want to know.. but that’s exactly what i’m saying. THanks to whoever sent me that theory, it got more fire this week.  Back on the actual plot turns out Darkwing dosen’t really have any foes to fight as while St. Canard has a reputation as a crime hole, Zan Owlson has taken over as mayor and cleaned it up. I assume in part because Glomgold seems to have no idea where she went and thus hasn’t done some elaborate scheme to show how much better off he is/kill scrooge mcduck. I mean let’s face it it always involves killing scrooge mcduck. His charitable contributions involve killing scrooge mcduck, his team ups with scrooge involve killing scrooge mcduck, his breakfast cereal came with a free knife and a map to scrooge’s house. Though I do defintely want to see Darkwing vs glomgold. I mean he’s not DW”s normal type of supervillian but still, tell me you wouldn’t see that.. and if your serious there’s the door. 

Anyways despite having no crime to fight and trying to bluff past it despite WANDA trying her best not to help his case, DW goes out on patrol with his boys anyway.. and procedes to just pose for several hours before trying to stop what turns out to be two guys moving furniture and being force to admit he’s not in a great place. He just wanted to fight crime and inspire people the same way Jim inspiried him.. before he you know went insane, tried to murder Drake and everyone on a film set then seemingly died but is now presumibly still in duckberg’s sewers.. or just as likely hiding in glomgold’s house hider in the house style.

And yes that’s a real movie in which a real gary busey lives in the walls of someone’s house. And funner fact it’s on amazon prime and I was unaware of this or I would’ve watched it sooner and will be as soon as this reivew’s finished. Possibly while this review is going on I dunno. Point is your lives are richer and we might have another possible spinoff/gay love story for Disney. Just saying Disney. 

Point is Drake is breaking down, but thankfully he landed in the right alleway as a small figure is breaking into the mcduck industirie’s st.canard branch, i.e. where Bulba is. Also I gotta admit while McDuck industries having a branch in St. Canard wasn’t a huge stretch, it was set up all the way in the pilot meaning Frank had the backdoor to set up an episode here since day one, along with every other major location really. Nicely done. 

Darkwing follows her and confronts her, stopping the seeming intruder from stealing the key to the ramrod device and finding out she’s a.. little girl? It’s goslyn everybody!

.... I .. why was this under clap. I mean it’s a very good message with a very nice garfiled head but i jus... what. 

Okay that’s better. Thank you Genie and thank you ghost of robin williams.. I miss you man. She escapes, though sans key and security storms in, with Drake looking guilty. After some banter with Scrooge who fails to recognize him which would be funny if it wasn’t utterly nonsencial. And utterly nonseical can be funny it just comes off less as “haha scrooge still dosen’t remeber him” and more “Wait you seriously don’t remember the guy who was crucial to one of your plans during the moonvasion and who got beat up on your behalf.. I expect better from you. “ Scrooge just dosen’t seem like the type to forget someone helping him in such a big way. He can be stubborn, stingy and selfish, but he’s not that forgetful. 

However Bulba enters, says he knows exactly who he is.. and we cut to a press confrence where Bulba is lauding him for stopping a dangerous intruder. Presumibly he vouched for Darkwing since he knew about Goslyn and it was an easy way to cover up her involvment and it’s probably not the first time she’s tried this. He’s awarded the key to the city by Mayor Owlson who, while not wanting more costumed vigilatnes, is happy to reward someone doing the right thing. And I .. love this. I was worried she’d be your standard I don’t like superheroes type mayor, the kind gotham keeps getting with predectable results despite you know, the bat family being vital for gotham not becoming more of a hellscape. Instead Mayor Owlson is grateful, respectful and only reasonably dosent want St Canard overun with heroes it dosen’t need.. yet. She may want to use the proper channels but she’s not going to try and run someone out of town or grumble out of them for trying to help her city. She gets it.  Meanwhile Huey’s hat explodes with with notes and what not, to Louie’s annoyance, though my boy’s excuse is utterly hilarious “It’s dewey’s hat”... boy still cannot lie. Louie is of course annoyed at him wanting to know how it works and possibly runining his dreams, but Huey is rightly concerned that he has no idea just how the Ramrod works or what powers it or what prinicpals it runs on. And it makes sense: Besides Huey always wanting to know how things work being his deal at this late point in the series there have been quite a few times, both involving huey and not involving him where something seeming to be too good to be true in fact was and had some dark secret behind it. Counting them off:

The House of the Lucky Gander: A seemingly swanky casino with the best water show ever turned out to be mostly an illusion created by a luck vampire. 

The Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks: Beloved tech icon Mark turned out to be the con artist we all know and love as well as the jackass we also know and tolerate. 

Beware the BUDDY System: Beaks new driving robot turned out to be stolen bulb tech that Beaks hadn’t bothered to fix properly. I know Huey wasn’t there for that one but still. 

Day of the Only Child: Again Huey wasn’t involved but probably heard about it later but since Louie WAS, he should know better. Louie befriends rich kid Doofus Drake only to end up nearly kidnapped because he’s creepy as shit. 

Who Is Gizmoduck?!: While Huey wasn’t the target here, he and Fenton are close friends at this point and he was direclty involved. Beaks trying to sponsor Fenton turned out to be a scheme to steal the Gizmoduck Armor. 

The Town Where Everyone Was Nice: A seemingly central american town having a friendly festival turns out to be a carnverous plant monster that wanted to eat them. 

The Dangerous Chemistry of Gandra Dee!: Fenton’s seemingly nice date turned out to be an industrial spy for .. Mark Beaks. Seriously he seems to love this type of scheme. Mark Beaks alone is reason for Huey not to take Bulba at face value. 

A Night On Kilmotor Hill: The kids being able to go into their dreams ends in Magica stalking and nearly taking back Lena. 

Quack Pack: A wacky sitcom wish nearly gets everyone eaten by horrifying versions of humans. 

The Lost Harp of Mrivana: While the Mirmaids werne’t responsible for the dark secret this time, their society was built on the philosphy of a man who turns into a giant sea monster and nearly lead them all to the same fate. 

The Trickining: A lost horde of candy ends up being a trap by a bunch of monsters to steal candy that nearly got them all eaten and hurt Huey’s feelings. 

The Forbidden Fountain of the Foreverglades: A two-fer as the resort their at steals youtha nd the fountain of youth they went to find turns out to need to drain it from someone first. 

And Louie was present for 9 of these! And the only one around for one of them! That’s what makes this frustrating: Huey and Dewey have grown, but Louie instead of learning from his mistakes, blindly trusts something too good to be true despite the fact he has a running tally of when that’s happened!  I get he’s lazy and dosen’t want this to turn out to be too good to betrue, but he’s too smart for him not to see the red flags or see that Huey’s not “ruining this for them” but has been through this enough, mostly with mark beaks or people around him, to see a pattern. It’s frustrating when Louie was given a whole season arc, and didn’t seem to have any of it stick despite you know nearly murdering his family and nearly getting murdered by a zombie. The show is better than that and knows it’s better than that and it’s one of the weaker points of the episode. 

Back to the stronger stuff though, it’s time for the moment you’ve been waiting for IT’S DEWEY DEW-NITE WITH DARKWING DUCK! I figured after the preview clips this was the one Frank had been hinting at all season and it’s finally here! Dewey, now fully on team darkwing, interviews the terror that flaps in the night.. and has a picture of him just coming out of the shower for some reason.. okay are Launchpad and Drake already together and no one told us? Whatever the case, Darkwing’s first big interview is interupted by Gosalyn. As for how she found them, she followed a combination of the resedue from his smoke bombs and Dewey’s livestream that’s been going on this whole time. As his attempts to hide Drake’s identnity and really this entire show up to this point has shown subtley is not Dewey’s strong suit. 

Gos, after snooping around a bit and even letting out a “Keen Gear!” for old time’s sake, and finding Drake’s lunch box and first darkness poster, reveals she came for help since she figures DW owes her one for last night.. or earlier tonight. The timescale in this special is really hard to figure out and only gets worse.  Gosalyn fills in her side of the story and why she broke into two places in the span of 24 hours. Turns out the Ramrod was in part created by Gosalyn’s grandpa, who was working under Bulba on the project. But one day Dr. Waddlemeyer found out the Ramrod was critically unstable and went to warn Bulba.. and never came back. Gosalyn wants to find him, and wants to DW to punch Bulba into telling her where he is. DW.. naturally does not and raises valid concerns: He’s an upstanding citzen whose offered his full support, has done nothing wrong in the public eye, and is nothing but nice to everyone and Gosalyn.. is a kid whose clearly in mourning, broke into two places, and has no evidence to back her up. He wants to help but he simply can’t and Gosalyn prepares to storm off herself.  However in a VERY nice moment, Dewey goes to her and offers to help, as obviously missing parents are a big button for him and he appricated the fact he had someone when he needed to look into his own missing parent and wants to be Gosalyn’s webby.. his exact touching words. It’s a nice call back that really ties Dewey into this story well: He has a solid motive besides crimefighting stuff to help here. Granted Gosalyn’s confused as she hasn’t met webby, yet, and Dewey’s puns don’t help, but as Dewey explains his Dewey puns to her and his name, Launchpad talks to Drake and encourages him to help her. Drake is in fact reluctant like Gosalyn thought for his image but also because as mentioned Bulba seems to belive in him And that’s. understandable. Since starting out, he’s had no crime to fight, no villians to vanquish and only one person acknowledge his work and existance and that person is standing right there. Bulba is the first person besides Launchpad to not only enourage his Darkwing Duties, but to honor that and got him cleared of possible tresspassing charges, a key to the city and an interview on the hottest show on the internet. This risks all of it. But Launchpad makes a good point.. that he needs to help those who can’t help themselves and while he dosen’t have to fight bulba, he can at least look into him. A look at his dented lunchbox reminds Drake that his best friend/future husband is right, and that he became darkwing to protect people like he used to be.. to help the helpless.. and Gosalyn is helpless right now.. plenty capable, but someone who clearly can’t do this alone. So the four take off in the ratcatcher.

The four sneak into Bulba’s office and root around, but end up having to hide when Taurus comes in, with DW hiding in his massive filing cabinet that resembles Darkwing’s own from the original series, that was retired since by now computers have made that kind of thing obsolete. Still it’s a nice nod. Turns out Huey is confronting Bulba as he genuinely dosen’t know how it works and Bulba is annoyed at all his questions. Really Terry there’s an easy way to fix that. 

But instead Scrooge comes in and while Terry TRIES to use him to brush off Huey.. Scrooge dosen’t bite and has learned to take Huey’s inquires seriously. And it’s something I didn’t notice about the series but love dearly now i’ve realized it with this bit: The Adults almost always take the kids concerns into considration and when they are brushed off it’s more due to personal issues, like scrooge’s pride, than because their kids. And given just how many hundred series have had the adults just brush off the kids issues like nothing, it’s REALLY refreshing that even reckless adults like Launchpad usually listen and that the kids competence isn’t entirely ignored just because of age. 

Bulba brushes them off by giving them the map to the ramrod.. speficially extensive notes on it that they have to carry out as a team. He then adresses Darkwing as he somehow knew he was there but again, is more than happy to help him with any investigation.. and it just so happens evidence Gosalyn was at least telling the truth on some level flies out of Bulba’s files as it shows a picture of him happily playing with Gosalyn and Dr. Waddlemeyer. 

Darkwing asks if he knows them and surprisingly Bulba is completely upfront about it or at least his version of events: Waddlemeyer was his best friend his close partner until one night he ran in raving about a problem with the ramrod and in trying to fix it, it backfired and then he was gone. Gos takes this well.. and tackles Bulba while calling him a liar and pockets the key toossing it to dewey as the two soon run from a pissed off Bulba. While Launchpad tackles Bulba away from the kids, Gosalyn TRIES to trigger the ramrod only for Darkwing to stop her. “I’m Sorry Kid but this isn’t going to bring your grandfather back” it’s then the entire episode is turned on it’s head. While, unfortunatley, the trailer gave away other dimensions would be involved, it didn’t however set this up “He’s not dead, he’s in another dimension!”

Yeah while it makes perfect sense in hindsight I dind’t see him being ALIVE ever being a thing, so well played frank.  Back with the rest of the family, Huey, Louie and Scrooge are diving around a stack of papers and Louie is sitll being a little shit, and not in the fun way in the “well not everything’s a missing mystery blah blah blah”... when you .. you learned tolerance for your brother two episodes ago. Thankfully this ends here..mostly because Huey ends up being right as Louie mentioning the misssing mysterys gives Huey his eurkea moment. Turns out the Ramrod uses one of them, Solego’s Circuit. Solego, based on the chaos god from the disney afternoon crossover something I missed on first watch, was in this universe a mad thinker who belived in the old theory that fiction is just a mirror to another universe and everything is real and found a way to open portals to other worlds. Problem was his methods were unstable, and could destroy the world, and likely the universe, if used repeadtly. Wuh-Oh

Back at the Ramrod, Bulba has launchpad on him, while Darkwing aand Gosalyn discuss things and come to the obvious conclusion: If Dr. Waddlemeyer was caught in a ramrod explosion then he’s likely out there somewhere and Darkwing clearly wants to help. Bulba TRIES playing diplomat again and mentoning that even if he’s out there the trillions of dimensions out in the multiverse mean he may be nigh impossible to find.. and the ramrod’s too unstable for that. This however finally backfires on him as Bulba had previously said it was perfectly stable, and has now fully confirmed gosalyn’s side of the story.. and since it is stable, if he’s not lying that is, then that means they can find Dr. Waddlemeyer and get the full truth.  Naturally at this point Bulba finally stops playing nice and knocks both over and triggers the ramrod which is now very clearly unstable from use and prepares to throw both into another dimension, also confirming that what happened to her grandfather was no accident. Thankfully Dewey arrives in the nick of time with a well place smokebomb and bulba gets hit with lightning from the machine giving him a scar and cleaving one of his horns. While Gos is able to escape thanks to launchpad it dosen’t last long and Bulba confronts her.. but soon makes the classic mistake of saying no one can save you now.  Cue Darkwing with the classic terror that flaps in the night speech. And unlike the original darkwing’s fights with Bulba, this fight is entirely in darkwing’s favor, as in a thrilling fight Darkwing beats the crap out of them then escapes Bulba’s fist , the only blow the man gets in this time. While Bulba still is a legit threat, he can’t match Drake’s speed or misdirection skills. However when trying to get the key, which Bulba grabbed earlier in the scene, Goslayn falls and Darkwing goes to save her. And while our heroes celebrate for a second with launchpad joining them.. Bulba has escaped AND still has the ramrod key. Uh-Oh

Bulba is of course activating the ramrod with SCrooge and the boys telling him to stop.. it’s too dangerous... but Bulba decides to get dangerous and pissed at darkwing, unleahses the fearsome four! Cue act break. We’ll be right back. Let’s have an intermission shall we. 

Okay break’s over. St. Canard isn’t doing great as the fearsome four have locked down the city, with Gizmoduck barely holding his own against bushroot and unable to get past, and thus meaning implicitly no one else from duckberg can either and with scrooge and the boys missing, Mayor Owlson calls on darkwing to save them, again giving her more points in my book as she rightly figures the guy dressed up as the hero from the tv show and playing him for reasl is the best person to face four villians from a 90′s tv show suddenly out and about and holding her city hostage. 

But Drake is spiraling a bit as these are super villians with super powers. This dosen’t quite work for me as A) He’s a super fan and thus should know their weaknesses and B) What.. what did he expect. Even the vast majority of Batman’s Rogues Gallery is super powered. But it’s a quick speed bump, understandable as Drake probably didn’t grasp the very real reality of fighting super crime. We also get to see all 4 classic DW Badguys int heir glory, and beating up bonkers, who apparently exists in this universe which is more suprising than it should be. HOwever Darkwing, ends up accidently coming up with a plan: capture one of them, get them to let them into bulba’s heavily foretfied lab turned lair, and use the ramrod to send them home and find dr. waddlemeyer. Easy. Well okay not so much as the two argue over Gosalyn coming along but Launchpad’s experince has taught him kids are the best adventuerers at all and they just need to be an adventure family. Gosalyn’s dewey, Darkwing’s launchpad and Launchpad’s the uncle.. not quite the right congifuration but his heart’s in the right place.. even if Gos refuses a family since she still has one.. even if you know she can always add the two of them in. Eh semantics point is WANDA found Quackerjack and Goslyn rightly points out they can handle just one villian. So they head out. Also during the scene Fenton tried to contact them but Darkwing semeingly brushed him off.. we’ll get to that later. As the camera closes in on Scrooge and the boys being seen as missing we find the boys at least as Bulba throws them in jail. Scrooge is still missing, though we’ll find out where he is soon enough. Bulba returns to his office to find Bradford. Unsuprisingly finding the circuit wasn’t an accident and Bulba was working out the circuit for F.O.W.L. this whole time. However Bradford also isn’t remotley happy about how big and bombastic things are getting. After all his modeus operandi is stealthy and quite not you know hyjacking an entire city with an unstable super science device and 4 villians from an old cartoon show. Bulba points out hey he wanted the world, this is the way to do it and when Bradford continues to push back against him Bulba rants: he’s just like scrooge or the waddlemeyers or darkwing no vision. Bradford may not see fowl as supervillians, which no dude you are just because you don’t operate in the open dosen’t make you not supervillians. one of you wears a hood for fucks sake. Supervillians don’t have to wear costumes just ask the kingpin.. or his lookalike bulba who has his newfound minons take out bradford and throws him in with the kids. Yeah maybe.. don’t downtalk the well intentioned madman. This is why you haven’t taken the world yet. But with both his bosses gone Bulba feels they need a big splash and takes Liquidator’s suggestion of killing darkwing duck, and sends everyone’s faviorite dog shaped liquid pitchman to bring him to Bulba. Side note I watched a few episodes to see if the series gets darkwing’s villians  down.. what changed. and .. yeah it ended up being irrlevant as while the four do get to show their stuff and liquidator, my faviorite so far and sadly the most underused, relaly gets time to shine, they aren’t really that diffrent. Except for bushroot who weirdly only uses godzilla noises now. Thanks I hate it. Otherwise though it’s pretty accurate to the series and hopefully wtih a reboot we’ll get full on reboot versions of all four. 

Meanwhile Team Darkwing stakes out quackerjack, with Darkwing still unsure of what to do, and Launchpad having brought snacks like a good uncle. Yeah while he did immitate scrooge for a second it’s clear he’s taking after donald. Awwwwwww. The two then procede to think over one of quackerjacks episodes and while gos goes to find him, they sing the theme song. Great. They do end up finding him.. and as in the episode it’s inside a giant mech.. that probably wasn’t cgi in the show.. or maybe it was but god it’d be awesomely horendous.. somebody make that. They narrowly escape him.. but run into liquidator instead. Wuh-Oh.  Meanwhile, literally as these bits are intercut but it was just easier to do it this way, Bradford is thrown in his cell and the kids are curious why he’s here, with Huey assuming he’s getting money and the kids breaking out with Bradford forced to follow, though caling Heron for an evac. Dewey actually has a plan: Since he knows Darkwing an Gosalyn won’t stop till they get to the ramrod, they simply need to find the ramrod and wait for them to show up and offer a way out, though Bushroot bars the way. Thankfully Dewey knows who he is as Launchpad naturally made him watch a LOT of darkwing duck but hey it came in handy and gives him something to bond with his birth dad over so that’s a bonus. 

The three make their way through, with Dewey singing the darkwing theme song.. and naturally being the one to trip the vines. our heroes make it out alive but bradford  is pisseeeeedddddddddd. And in his rage accidently says maybe a bit too much after dewey incorrectly assumes he’s never felt this alive in years. 

“I’ve never been closer to death thanks to your foolhardy adventuring! If you didn’t meddle with forces you didn’t understand Magica De Spell wouldn’t have broken the bin, the moon never would’ve invaded earth and all of reality wouldn’t be in jeopardy! SOMEONE HAS TO PUT AN END TO THIS!” Yeah this speech .. is damn good hence me quoting it in full and Mark Evan Jackson really sells it. While granted we knew this was what started FOWL trying to elimiate the ducks, that’s how we found out FOWL existed still after all at the end of last season, here it becomes clear that despite Bradford saying it’s just buisness and seemingly being business minded.. this is PERSONAL. He genuinely seems to hate the ducks and their adventuers and the damage they cause and seems to blame them and soley them for everything that goes wrong.

And I was going to say “Well he’s not entirley wrong” as their adventures have had consequences.. but as I looked through the episodes.. I realized I was wrong. Out of 60 episodes so far, the ducks actions have only threanted duckberg or Scrooge’s buisness a handful and most of those are Louie. They are :

Louie misusing little bulb in the great dime chase wrecking parts of the bin

The beanstalk incident from Jaw$, which Scrooge was called out on in the public. 

Gizmoducks messy bank robbery prevention in who is gizmoduck, easily outweighed by everything since. 

Destroying an underwater research station in the depths of cousin fethry which was in part due to natural wildlife. 

Scrooge’s flu and stubborness tanking stocks in “The 87 cent solution” not to mention destroying property. While yes Scrooge was being played by glomgold his own stubborness and the kids refusal to call beakly lead to it playing out longer than it should have. 

Ruined an expensive movie production (Which is partly Jim’s fault, but scrooge still didn’t get intolved at any point or have anyone more experinced oversee boreswan or even ever contact jim about a cameo. )

Louie nearly destroying time itself in timephoon.

Della giving the moonlanders the blueprints for the spear

And as you can tell almost all of them aside from louie’s two incdients involve some form of extenuating circumstances. While Chaos has insued it’s never been intentional and always been cleaned up. Even the invasion, as close a call as that was, was solved BY the family and their allies.. and glomgold, but hey sometimes you need an x factor.  Most of the duck’s actions have only backfired on themselves of people nowhere near duckberg or scrooge’s intrests and most villians gunning for them would regardless if scrooge was active or not: Glomgold hates scrooge for entirely personal reasons, Magica was locked up for good reason and while she got out due to the family’s rift, she would’ve done what she did with the bin regardless, the beagles just want their land back even if Scrooge rightfully owns it, Beaks maniuplated fenton to get the armor and now goes after him out of jealousy, and Lunaris was already going after earth Della just sped it up and did so in good faith entirely unaware he was a invader. These nuts would be gunning for scrooge anyway, and while some of it’s due to his life as an adventuerer, said life was started before Bradford was born. Scrooge isn’t responsible for guys coming after him any more than batman, or spide-rman. Sure a hero being around gives them reason to keep trying but it also means there’s someone to STOP them.  And more importantly, as I always intended to prove, their adventures have done more good than harm: Beisdes the obvious mending and extending of their family, with Donald and Scrooge patching things up and Beakly, Launchpad and especially webby being warmly welcomed in and Della finally finding a way home, not to mention their various allies, over the last 60 episodes our heroes have, and yes another list and a long one so buckle up. In chrnological order:

Brought clean, limitless water to duckberg, if through scrooge’s water company. 

Defeated a luck vampire that was kidnapping innocent people (Okay Gladstone’s probably mildly incident but even he didn’t deserve that) and likely left him unable to continue his scheme. 

Freed a lost and enslaved Egyptian civlization from a tyrant and brought them quite literally into light.. and gave them burritos. 

Defeated Zeus.. not really a huge change for humanity but given what a dick he is I’m counting it. 

Through Gyro’s invetion of the gizmotech armor and Fenton’s use of it, gave duckberg a superhero whose since cleaned up crime, keeps the city safe while scrooge isn’t around and is beloved by the city. 

Stopped a known super spy.. who works for Bradford but still. 

Defeated Magica, saved the entire city, and depowered her all in one day and all together.

Found an entirely new and giant species of plankton and gave their cousin a purpose

Destroyed an evil plant monster that had likely eaten dozens before that. 

Helped a man find his family’s treasured lamp

Opened a museum wing to share Scrooge’s various treasures with the world. 

Hundreds of years ago stopped a robber baron from bleeding a town dry. 

Donald selflessly possibly sacrificing himself in a dangerous rocket to try and get home to warn earth and his family of the coming invasion. 

Taught Lena how to love herself, got her to turn against magica, and then with Violet’s help Webby helped her return to life, and find a home where she’s actually loved and wanted and finally happy and free. 

Stopped beaks rampage.. granted it was with stolen gizmotech, but he still stole it int he first place. 

Gave the Drakes an adopted son who genuinely loves them and sucessfuly gave them finacial freedom from their cruel, sociopathic biological son. 

Stopped an army of scrooge’s greatest foes from stealing his company. 

Formed a resistance against the moonlander invasion, stopping it eventually with glomgold and the cousins help. 

After that stopping Lunaris backup plan to destroy the earth itself along with his own people. 

As a result of all of this, despite the invasion, introducing a new population of happy, repentant for their invasion of the world aliens into duckberg who have been loyal and hardworking. 

If unknowingly stopping Fowl’s own agent from killing everyone in duckberg. 

Saving a lost society of mermaids and helping them start over

Sucessfully saving a charity gala from hyjackers. 

Helping Daisy start the career she wants. 

Saving BOYD from being hyjacked by dr akita

Saving all of Tokyok from Akita’s plans for boyd.

Finally letting BOYD be his own boy and break free from his past. 

Defeating team Ragnarok and saving the earth from the end of days. 

Defeating the phantom blot while unlocking Lena’s powers, both saving an innocent child from death and giving duckberg protection from Magica once and for all. 

Helping penny adjust to earth giving Duckberg another defender besides Gizmoduck and the clan mcduck. 

Stopping ponce de leon from draining the youth from anyone else and restoring all his victims. 

So yeah five times the number of bad things they’ve done or money they’ve lost. For all the chaos it causes the ducks have changed so many lives and not just their own for the better. And I think that’s the problem: Bradford only sees thing in the terms of possesion in money, and helping people gets him NONE of that. To him all of this is just more risks to the world and his control of it. To him Scrooge has near complete control of duckberg, thousands of buisnesses, the potetial to grip the world.. and he uses it to seemingly endanger it and better lives instead of his own. I mean he has enriched his own but still. Bradford simply CAN’T see past himself or his own saftey and greed to see any benifit for anyone else. ONly himself and with scrooge gone the world is his, the world is safe, and the world is better. In other words.. he’s who scrooge ALMOST became, minus the effort to get things himself. A bitter old man who cares only about himself and his possesions and wants nothing else. We’ve seen it here and we’ve seen it in the life and times: Without his family scrooge grows cold and alone.. and without anyone to really care about Bradford is what he’d become.  He’sd also forced to eat his transmitter after blaming his outburst on his lack of medication. Wah Wah. 

Back at Darkwing Tower, after what feels like 80 years, our heroes squabble a bit as Gosalyn wants to run off after another villian to get to her grandpa while Darkwing wants them to get some rest while he takes care of some buisness> Gosalyn balks at this, all but shouts YOUR NOT MY REAL DAD! and then runs off to the overlook of hte tower. While Darkwing takes a call with Fenton at long last, Launchpad goes to comfort the girl. She admits straight up she was a bit hard on the guy she’s just desperate to find him. And it turns out darkwing as over hte last.. few nights? Wait....

I’m genuinely confused as the time skip at the end of act one indicated a day at most yet i’ts apparently been several and drake’s been loosing sleep over it? And even WITH the lockdown the rest of the duck family hasn’t barged in? I mean yes the four are keeping the gates shut but even with fenton trying, I highly doubt della has the patience to wait while her kids and baiscally dad are in serious danger, and they still have the cloudslayer/sunchaser and while yes bushroots pplans could stretch up it’s as simple as della flying up and then landing somewhere. I don’t think mayor owlson would complain TOO much about property damage and while scrooge would grumble he’d pay for it. Point is the timescale here is confusingingly worded. At most i’d say a day has passed and darkwing hasn’t slept since last night, as that makes more sense than “Whelp I guess our famiy’s been missing for days nothing weird about that. As I said the timescale for this episode is really weird and one of it’s few problems, the other being, now we’ve met them might as well get out of the way, how throwaway darkwing’s foes feel. They all, minus mega volt, get a moment to shine but they all feel like interchangable goons. Like any of them could’ve done any of their scens just swap out the gimmick. I do get this episode has a LOTTTTTT going on at once, so I get any character bits with them probably got shoved out and odds are we’ll get “real world” throughly updated versions next time, it just feels weird to make such a big deal and bring the fearsome foursome in and not either give them a bigger roll or have them stick around for the future, though as I said frank will probably remake them from the ground up for the reboot with new origins and what not, and some might intentional take after them like drake did with tv darkwing, so fair enough, just felt it was a bit of a waste but I understand it given the sheer amount of stuff to fit into a 45 minute special. 

Back on the actual plot though Darkwing’s been up all night conversing with Fenton trying to find dr. waddlemeyer. And Fenton sadly has no good news: Not only does the Ramrod have only one shot left in it before it breaks reality, but even if that gives them one shot to find Dr. Waddlemeyer.. there are trilions of universes out there. The odds of finding it before reality goes bye bye are slim to none. But Darkwing refuses to give up as he refuses to let Gosalyn down. It shows that despite his earlier fear.. Drake is a damn good person and wants to make up for not beliving in gosalyn, to help her anyway he can no matter what it takes. Gosalyn realizes she’s been kind of a dick and helps darkwing and herself get some sleep, and in a reversal of the scene from Darkly Dawns the duck, hums little girl blue to him. Awwww.. my heart.. it’s too full!. 

Back at the tower, the boys and bradford find the ramrod and bradford grumbles as he finds where scrooge is: trapped in the ORIGINAL ducktales reality, though using the remastered proportions and blue eyes. It’s a good gag especially since Bulba specifically trapped him in this scene. 

Beautiful. Bradford wonders how the hell he’s going to cover this up.. and Huey overhears him, having already been suspcious because while good at running a massive shadowy conspiracy, he didn’t you know, tell heron to keep it down on the transponder as the boys were around and her continuned interputions and his outburst earlier made Huey suspcious. Before Bradford can cover he starts coughing (With Dewey’s pricless injection of “Oh no we killed him!”) and coughs up the transmitter.. with Heron inconvently pointing out he’s fowl high command. He’s the bad guy.. from the kids point of view at least. But Bradford just chucks them into the 87 dimension where they stare blankly at scroog’es rampage. So now it’s all down to team darkwing.  Speaking of which their all asleep but Wanda wakes darkwing up and in another ddtd parallel, he leaves to take care of this himself, if without Gosalyn waking up this time. His reason is simple though: The ramrod has fired up and this is their only shot at getting her grandpa back. So Darkwing strolls in.. and once Bulba and the fearsome four marvel at his directness, Bulba sends them to knock his brains out and drag him in. Thankfully Gosalyn and Launchpad wakeup and while Gosalyn is mad for a second, she sees him getting drug in and finally realizes just charging in isn’t going to do it. .and since Launchpad knows DW like the back of his hand, he gets them in by dressing them up as Jumbalya Jake and the Bugmaster. I’ve heard of both though why the hell Frank chose Jumbalya jake over .. ANYONE else, is beyond me. Bugmaster is fairly popular, Jumbalya Jake.. is basically a less intresting fuzzy lumpkins. Regradsleess it works and our heroes make their way inside. 

Bulba is preparing to his big hyjack the airways villian speech, contacting the leaders of the world.. and killing darkwing, whose none to happy about it to show their serious with an ultimatium: either let him use the ramrod to change the world for hte better or else. And this seems a good as time as any to talk about Bulba.. whose utterly EXCELLENT in the reboot. And I loved the original but instead of just being a super comptietn villian bulba is instead a well meaning one. While he embraces the supervillian lifestyle and flunkies and flamboyance, he’s also just trying to remake the world, to make it BETTER than it was beofre, to end hunger, no traffic acidents. It dosen’t make him a good person, much like magneto or disney’s own toffee, the ends do not jusify the means and he’s likely going to destroy reality in the process, and it’s clear his own arrogance is at much at play as his desire to do goo dand anyone with valid concerns is just a doubting asshole. He’s a compelling villian and James Monroe englehart REALLY fucking brings it, creating a villian with style, a mission and competence galor. He’s really damn good and easily tops the original which is not easy at all, but props to frank for doing it. 

But before he can get started, Gosalyn throws the smoke bombs down all around and does Darkwing’s terror that flaps in the night bit for him, and the distractoin allows DW to escape and kick bulba in the face. A HELL of a fight insues. That’s one of the best things this series does is fight corpegraphy as while battles aren’t in EVERY episode, whent hey do happen their spectacular as Darkwing and Launchpad take on the fearsome four in one hell of a beautiful sequence. Darkwing and Launchpad plan to take the four on while Gosalyn gets to the ramrod. Gosalyn understandably questions how an actor and a launchpad are going to take on four villians with the two piping in that bushroot really isn’t na villian which .. I mean he KINDA is but the symapthetic kind that would probably give it up eventually but fair enough. I still like that nod even if this version is less adorakable traumatized plant and more...

Still Goslyn realises their power! THeir nerds! And with the power of fanboyness, and taking a few hits and refrencing the just us justice ducks episode I haven’t seen yet, their triumphant. Singed but triumphant. 

Meanwhile Gos continues to try and find her grampapapapapapapappapappaaaaaaaa while Bulba engages Darkwing and Launchpad. Jokes on him their already engaged to each other! She fails to find him but does find the ducks, who wonder what quackaroonie means and why their heads were round.

As the Ramrod rips a massive hole in time and space that threatens to suck everyone in. While Dewey encourages Gosalyn to keep going Huey tells her to stop... which.. Huey you lost your parent too, end of the world or not you can phrase it better. Otherwise top notch youv’e been the best this episode. And in one of the best scnees of the episode Gosalyn realizes what she has to do and despite Bulba tempting her with another relality she ddosen’t even consider it.. she shoots the ramrod with her crosbow, destroying it, with the final portal taking the fearsome four .. somewhere. I dunno? Cleavland..antis? I’m sure their fine. Bulba is knocked out though, and Gosalyn slowly weeps while her new dad consoles her. It’s a touching scene.

Thattt’s soon interupted with one last bit of unfished buisness as Huey suddenly realizes OH CRAP BRADFORD”S MISSING. They find him heading off in a marked FOWL helicopter, which Bradford points out the stupidity of but with Scrooge now having concrete visual evidence his head investor is running one of the oldest and deadliest spy agencies in the world, and their gunning for him decides to give a big of a gloat and tells Scrooge his adventure fantasy is ending while Scrooge remarks their world got a lot more dangerous. And yeah.. while I doubt Bradford will still brook over the top villiany, he now no longer has to hide his agents from scrooge or dance his operation around him and likely has enough embezlled funds to keep fowl going long enough to take out scrooge.  And yeah before we get to the end, thank god as while I love this review it’s been one of the longest writing experiments of my life., let’s talk about the FOWL overarching Plot and the interlocked missing mysteries subplot. The progress up till now has.. not really been great. Understandable but wheras season 2 had way too much plot this season took until thsi episode for the plot to really kick in. It’s been aggrivating and both fowl agents after you only crash twice .. really had nothing to do with them in their missions, with both only really using their resources. However.. as slow as it’s been, I will give credit in two places: 1, htis was likely done to get plots out of the way that were lighter and less tied into things, with only two exceptions in the next 6 episodes judging from the just released synposis for novemeber. And 2) the fowl episodes that WERE there set things up brillinatly. You Only Crash Twice set up heron’s lack of stealth and overt villianly, so her calling bradford a ton and bringing a marked helicopter did’t come out of nowhere, while last week’s episode hinted at the fact that FOWL somehow has acess to their own copy of finch’s diary or an equivleant. While we don’t know all the details. This episode also got the plot into overdrive by fleshing out bradford anymore, adding into his lack of liiking cartoon supervilliany by giving him a well and true hatred for scroooge and co. It’s not just the risk, he truly hates their lifestyle and LOATHES all of them and wants them gone.. and now he’s getting his chance. Overall it hasn’t been a bad plot and I get why it’s mostly in the back, but it still could’ve used some build up. But they worked well with what they had. I will also say the focus on Huey is ramping up with the last batch of episodes, so this really has turned out to be his season afterall. Good.  So we wrap our story back at Darkwing Tower as Gosalyn bemoans the fact her grandpa is gone. But Drake, for the first time this episode in his civies, softly encourages her to, much like him at her age, get back up again. She got blown up, buffeted around and lost a lot. but they WILL find him. Afterall Drake has a scientest friend who knwos another scientest, and until then.. she can be his crime fighting partner/implicit daughter. So Gosalyn, after so much rejection of it finally accepts her new family while Launchpad runs in to join them with dewey’s blessing. He’s not leaving the show ind, he’s just going to spend days in duckberg, nights in saint canard and sleep on the drive over, to Drake’s pitch perfect “What the actual shit bud” face. Gosalyn is happy, ,and Wanda has a crime for them to chase and our hapy family , back after way too long, heads off into the night to get dangerous. Wheew. 

Final Thoughts: God damn this was a long one. I mean it was an hour long but god damn I had a lot to say. But it was a good one. Minor flaws aside, a second watch showed off the pacing, great jokes, amazing emotoinal core, perfomances and plot progression. Unlike the Duck Knight returns the episode wisely ballances darkwing with the boys and scrooge, and interweaves them beautiful as well as finding a credible way for them to find out about FOWL. The game has changed.  I also saved the best for last as Stephanie Beatriz was fucking amazing as Gosalyn. While i’ve always loved her, she’s nice, bi and utterly fantastic on brooklyn nine nine why wouldn’t I?, and was excited I was both suprised by how diffrnet her gos voice is from her regular one, though shouldn’t have been as her rosa voice is also vastly diffrent.. seriously stephanie do more voice work your great at it, and Gos was rebooted well, sanding a bit of her hellion streak off while still feeling like the character and instead of just ignoring her grandpa’s death after one episode, making it inot a major part of her character arc here and likely in the future. It’s damn good stuff. The special really overall gets the spirit fo darkwing while making something, new , fresh and bold out of it and easily holds it’s own among the other specials. Nothing much else to say that hasn’t been said, this special was utterly amazing, go watch it. 

Now with that done if you like my weekly ducktales reviews, you can follow me for more, comment to tell me how i’m doing and i’m proud to announce.. follow me on my brand spanking new patreon! 2 dollar patrons get a poll once I have enough to do one of those, a discord once I get any, and 10 dollar backers get to pick a review for me a month! If you have the dough, please check it out and if not tha’ts okay. Until next time get dangerous but in the safest way possible, don’t forget to vote trump out and happy halloween! Play us out  Jeff Pescetto!

[thelowlysatsuma]

Ramble in whatever form you choose. I won’t be able to be active all the time so if you want to be able to do it whenever you want I’d say text posts but I’ll also try to occasionally ask you about them so there’s some variety

!!! okay! well i think i’ll choose a couple from the list that i haven’t made many posts about before (aka no ts or go) and ramble on here!

oof under the cut bc idk how long this will get

steven universe

oh hon don’t even get me STARTED on su like that shit? that shit is so good? okay first of all i love the cast so much? gosh they’re just all so sweet and cool and sometimes they collab w/ thomas sanders and i love rebecca sugar and im gonna cry they’re so sweet im so soft

okay SECONDLY the show itself oof

okay okay im just? god im so soft?? like the music is so good, i can (and do) watch it w/ my parents, GOD do i wanna cosplay pearl’s new outfit (and rainbow 2.0, if i can pull it off), im in love with the concept and all the fusions and the story and the worldbuilding and god, this made me realize my utter love and adoration of COLOURS like they’re so PRETTY im in LOVE oh my gOD and just

god it has such a good message and such a good plot and such good characters i wanna be steven’s friend i wanna be all of their friends oh man i just can’t wait until my baby cousins are old enough for me to show this to them because i’m going to enjoy that experience so much

ducktales

oh jfc where the fuck do i even start with ducktales okay david tennant as scrooge mcduck makes my fucking life literally he’sthe best goddamn charaacter in the show – well, best besides the triplets (my BOYS), webby (!!! my KID), f e n t o n (god i love that nerd), mark beaks (what an asshole), mrs beakley (i wanna be her when i grow up), launchpad (!!! he!!), and so many others??? this is like serious every character in the show erasure but hot damn duck tales says gay rights and it does so in style (oh yeah also i love lena della donald oh webby’s new friend whose name i forget uhhh herules oh the inventor guy fenton’s boss that dipshit love him uhhh gandra dee who’s voiced by jameela jamil if im not mistaken??????) and yeah it’s a hilarious show but it’s also just a really good one for me to watch whenever i start to like. feel empty inside?? but then like i’ll put on ducktales and i’ll feel better

gravity falls

this show. this show RUINED ME. i started watching it like four years late (aka last year lmao) but GOD, im so in love with it. def another one i wanna show my cousins.

like?? just??? the ciphers and mysteries appeal so much to me and my love of mystery and crime novels, the characters are all amazing, alex hirsch himself is just such a g?? and like. it’s so good. it hurts me so much but then it’s all okay in the end and it’s just. it’s so good.

yeah i sobbed my eyes out when i watched that series finale.

camp camp, which somehow i forgot on my other list

god, is this show hilarious. like, fuck is it funny. it’s so good. it’s so fucking good. i was a little shocked when i saw the first episode but i’m so into it now, and i’m so attatched to all the characters bc they’re just dumbasses trying their best (or worst, in a few cases) and i love them for it. that’s peak fool energy right there and it speaks to me

orphan black

okay okay okay veering now into a much darker type of television, orphan black is??? phenominal???

okay so my best friend @fuck-me-gently-with-a-slurpee got me into it when i was like 14 or 15 i think and i honestly cannot thank her enough because this show is incredible. the plot’s super engaging, i literally cannot say anything about it without giving away spoilers, and the main character has quite possibly the best actor i’ve ever seen playing her

like. you think thomas sanders is good? he ain’t got SHIT on tatianna maslany

mythbusters

you guys. you guys. mythbusters was my childhood. like seriously, i watched that show religiously.

it’s what first got me into science, and it’s what kept me interested in explosions. it’s light and funny and ridiculous and scientifically accurate in the dumbest ways possible. i swear to god the main cast nearly dies once an episode

these guys are my idols. like, i seriously cannot overstate how much i love the mythbusters. adam and jamie, tori, kari, and grant.

when i was a kid, i wanted to be a mythbuster when i grew up, and god damnit, i still do. they mean that much to me

bill nye

fun fact! i actually had no fuckin clue who bill nye was until seventh grade, when i had to watch an episode of his show for homework because i missed a day of class. it was the episode on static electricity, and i remember sitting at my dining room table in the dim winter afternoon light, squinting at my computer, and thinking “what the FUCK am i WATCHING?”

needless to say, i’ve seen more since then, but that initial what the fuckery is still present and i love it.

not only is bill nye the science guy a flippin fantstic show, but bill nye himself? the coolest guy alive. god, i love him. what a g.

various comedians including but not limited to john mulaney,john oliver, and hasan minhaj

okay, as a gay, i am legally required to love john mulaney, but seriously that guy is so. fuckin. funny that i can’t help myself. his timing is priceless, the way he moves onstage is hysterical, just. god i love his stuff.

literally his comedic timing and style is half the reason people find me funny. i just phrase my sentences the way he would because, you know, i’m good at stealing things, and people laugh, and i go “hey. that actually worked”. and then i keep doing it

next, john oliver. okay, so while i don’t watch his show religiously, i do watch it when my parents do every now and again, and fuck is his stuff funny. like. just. shit.

finally, hasan minhaj’s patriot act is just. one of my favourite current events comedy shows out there. it’s in a similar vein to john oliver’s stuff, just more international, and shit, is he good at what he does. i lvoe it.

hoodwinked the movie (i am dead serious)

okay, while i haven’t seen it in over four years, this is still my favourite movie of all time. it also has one of my favourite villain songs of all times, and some of the best character exchanges just. ever. especially with wolf and twitchy

...god, i love twitchy. also the goat. i’m probably gonna be the goat when i grow up, let’s be honest

one day at a time

i just.

there’s so much to say about odaat. like. it’s so funny. it makes me nearly cry every episode (and makes my mother actually cry every episode). the characters, god, the characters

like. alex is such a cute dumb kid (who’s smarter than he looks), penelope is so salty constantly and i love her but she’s genuinely so cool and such a good mom and i cry??? elena is so amazing like god she’s such a fuckin nerd but she’s also so salty (takes after her mom) and is literally the best????

and then there’s abuelita, whom i adore. like, god, rita moreno is SO cool and SUCH a great actress and has SUCH an amazing sense of comedic timing and GOD, i LOVE HER

can’t forget about syd and doc berkowitz, which like. okay first off the good doc. just. god i love the doc. he’s so sweet and such a genuinely good dude and he’s a bit of a coward at heart but that’s okay because he genuinely cares and does his best and god he’s just such an amazing character im !!!!! and then syd is such a dork and i love them and elena and god, it made me so happy to see not only an actual enby character on a big sitcom, but also just?? like??? it’s not forced but it’s still there??? like there’s one episode where one of the plots is just syd and elena trying to figure out what elena should call them, since neither of them are comfy using “girlfriend” for syd since they’re not a girl, and they finally agree on “significant other” and schneider imMEDIATELY says “dont you mean, SYDnificant other?” and then they use that for the REST OF THE SHOW IT”S SO CUTE OKAY

and finally, schneider. he might be my favourite character in the entire show (which is a damn hard list to pick from!!!), but he’s just. he’s so sweet, he and penelope have one of the absolute best male/female friendships i’ve ever seen (which! never! turns! romantic! ever!!!), he’s actually got surprising depths but he’s also like such a nice goofball that when they get revealed, it hurts, and he’s just this canadian dumbass (heyyyyy repreSENT) with the worst goddamn canadian accent sometimes and he’s a hipster and The Dumb Friend and the weird uncle all rolled into one and GOD, i love him so much

the good place and brooklyn 99

okay, i love these two both so, so much, but i’m lumping them together because a) they’re both mike schur shows with a similar sense of humour, that say gay rights, and with characters who’d definitely love each other if they met and b) my hand is getting tired from all this typing but i still have so much  love to go around!!!!

okay so so SO! they’re both so good. they’re so fucking funny and amazing and i was immediately hooked on both of their pilots. their characters are all so genuine and flawed and fucking hysterical to watch, and the ships and friendships are all so amazing and pure and good and soft and they have their problems and they WORK THEM OUT HEALTHILY AND IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY OKAY!!!

god, i literally cannot overstate how much i adore these two shows. mike schur, you’re a wonderful, wonderful dude. thank you so much

many musicals (top faves include BOM, hamilton, legally blonde, chicago, matilda, and more!)

i’m putting the musicals together because while i do adore each and every one of them individually, i also just have great big deep-seated love of the art of musical theatre itself in general, ya feel?

like, as someone who’s been both performing and viewing them from a very young age, the sheer sense of utter joy they bring is almost unparalleled

not to be That Bitch who quotes musicals, but “and that hop in our hearts as the overture starts lets us know how lucky we are” might be the closest i’ve ever gotten to finding words to fit the feeling when the lights go down and the show begins. it’s simply phenomenal

the others series by anne bishop

okay, OKAY, if you haven’t read this series (first book called written in red – they have terrible titles but god, they’re worth it), then what are you doing with your life? like, not only is there the perfect logicality au to them (just sayin’), but god, it’s such an incredible series

the worldbbuilding is so cool and the characters are all great and god the ships are the damn hill i die on it’s got literally such a good “sort of enemies mostly just dislike each other to reluctant acquaintances to friends to lovers” ship and it deals with some serious issues rlly well and it’s got baby puppies!!!

like, they’re wolf puppies, but still, they are b a b e y

and finally (for now, at least), the mysterious benedict society, by trenton lee stewart

this book series was my childhood. i mean, there are so many other books i could be talking about right now that i utterly adore (the artemis fowl series springs to mind), but gosh, MBS just brings me such absolute joy to read that i just had to have it on here.

i’m not thinking straight at this point in the evening, but i just wanna say that i will never, not ever forget about reynie. about kate. about sticky. about constance. about rhonda and number two and milligan and miss perumal and my absolute son sq pedalian and, of course, i will never, never forget about mr benedict

it’s bright, and it’s bittersweet, and it’s beautiful.

and it’s good. simply, utterly, wonderfully good.

thank you for the ask, anon.

thank you.

[pass-the-bechdel]

Supergirl season three full review

How many episodes pass the Bechdel test?

100% (twenty-three of twenty-three).

What is the average percentage per episode of female characters with names and lines?

57.23%

How many episodes have a cast that is at least 40% female?

All but one (it was that crappy crossover episode). All but four have casts over 50%.

How many episodes have a cast that is less than 20% female?

Zero.

How many female characters (with names and lines) are there?

Forty-four. Twenty who appeared in more than one episode, five who appeared in at least half the episodes, and two who appeared in every episode.

How many male characters (with names and lines) are there?

Thirty-four. Ten who appeared in more than one episode, four who appeared in at least half the episodes, and one who appeared in every episode.

Positive Content Status:

Not bad; a handful of episodes included some sincere effort to make quality statements about social issues, but they were pretty clunky about it and not always successful; certainly never impressive enough to increase the content rating (average rating of 3).

General Season Quality:

Middling. It was full of useless plot threads and wasted time, and much of the content had no real function; consequently, the central story arc lacked stakes, emotional resonance, and heart. That said, most of the episodes are basically solid viewing, and there was infinitely less rage-inducing content than there was in season two. That’s a weak win, but still a win.

MORE INFO (and potential spoilers) under the cut:

Hey, remember Morgan Edge? He was in four episodes at the beginning of the season, served no real narrative function despite his prominent treatment within those recurrences, and then Lena had him arrested using the most obviously-coerced confession in history? Sure, he was guilty, but he confessed under duress while being actively threatened with death by drone, the evidence of both the tape itself and of the testimony of the many eyewitnesses to the attack would have had him bouncing out of jail like that. The ridiculousness of that plot ‘resolution’ was even worse than the meaninglessness of Edge’s character in the first place. Remember when, briefly, they pretended that Morgan Edge was important?

Edge is a prime example of the fatal flaw in this entire season: pointless plot threads that went nowhere, meant nothing, furthered no characterisation for regular characters, and had no impact on the central arc of the season. Story-wise, the season lurched all over the place, and while it wasn’t without its good elements, ultimately it achieved very little. Sure, the season ended with a number of apparent changes for most of the major characters’ lives (though, conspicuously, not Kara’s) - Alex is now head of the DEO, J’onn is doing...something else, hopefully not something that removes him from the show, Winn has apparently gone to the future, traded out for our new friend ‘Brainy’ (a change I will be happy for if it sticks), and James has publicly revealed himself as Guardian - but the thing is, these changes are mostly last-minute, not things that the season was building toward all along. These changes are mostly not the result of character arcs, they’re just things that are happening now as set-up for next season. This season itself? Not much happened.

We wasted quite a lot of time with Mon-El, AGAIN, which is especially disappointing because it’s the largest time-and-attention-suck of the season, and it is completely irrelevant to everything; at least when we were wasting time with Mon-El last season, it was because he was the centrepiece of the (awful) plot. This time around, he’s just there to draaagg out the fallout from his departure, so that instead of getting over the relationship within the six months between the end of last season and the beginning of this one, Kara can continue to pine ridiculously and then get caught up in ~complicated feelings~ when Mon-El reappears, back from the future and bringing his new wife with him. That’s the closest thing Kara gets to a personal arc this season, actually; having ~complicated feelings~ about Mon-El. So, her story isn’t really about herself, it’s about whatever Mon-El is doing (again!), and then after wasting the entire season on that sorry excuse for a story, they amicably split in the end and he goes back to the future and that’s...it? I sincerely hope that’s it, and that he won’t be appearing again as a regular on the show, but it’s also a super disappointing waste of time. They didn’t have to bring Mon-El back at all, not for some drawn-out version of ‘closure’ for Kara, and not for any of the other nothing that his presence achieved in the meantime. Honestly, having characters show up FROM THE FUTURE and then not doing anything useful or important with it is so weird. We coulda dropped Brainy here and sent Winn away in a short-arc subplot, it’d have been neater and less time consuming, and we wouldn’t have troubled with all the Mon-El and Imra crap. As much as Mon-El kept carrying on about how he would never disrespect Imra, the story itself disrespects her by giving her no other meaningful narrative function than to be a barrier between Mon-El and Kara (which, as the story plays out...didn’t matter anyway). The whole thing amounts to a lot of bluster with no real impact; we end the season with Mon-El gone and Kara having to move on, and that’s EXACTLY HOW WE ENDED LAST TIME.

Meanwhile, back at the actual central arc for the season, shit was still whack, y’all. I wondered what they were gonna do with it after they went and had Reign show up so early in the piece (I thought maybe they were gonna build over the course of the season with Samantha progressively losing more control, but, that woulda required narrative pacing and story building to be in play, and the creators weren’t into that kind of crap this season), and what they went for was a completely pointless side-distraction with two other, lesser world-killers, who appeared out of nowhere, fooled around for a few episodes, and then died, ne’er to trouble the story again. Reign absorbing their powers didn’t have any effect (particularly egregious since the Legion was so worried about Pestilence, only to declare their work done once she was gone because apparently, Reign wasn’t gonna go around using that particular world-killer power anyway, because...reasons), they might as well have never included other world-killers at all, the only reason they were there was so that the plot could tread water for a while after revealing its Big Gun at mid-season and having nowhere left to go. Selena and her fellow witches, likewise, proved utterly pointless, just another distraction that wound up easily dispatched, and meanwhile Reign was killed/separated from Samantha only to return again and then be pretty easily defeated anyway with a combination of shoddy time travel and the last-minute addition of a convenient...magic fountain. Yeah. Even the oft-repeated notion they hammered about saving Samantha by recalling her to herself, using her connection with Ruby, etc, turned out to be a total smokescreen - Samantha and Ruby both proved to be total plot devices rather than characters in their own right, foisted on the pre-existing characters to generate artificial emotional stakes with a friendship that burst forth fully-formed in the space of two episodes, and giving Alex a child to focus her maternal instincts on for a while. Presumably, we’ll now never see them again. 

Oh, and did I mention that Kara finds out that her mother and a whole chunk of Krypton actually survived, but they totally underplay it and she has essentially no emotional reaction to this development at all? Since this seemingly life-altering revelation also has no impact on character or story, they might as well not have bothered, I mean, Kara is more hung up on losing her asshole boyfriend from last season than she is on discovering that a whole piece of her world (friends/family included) is actually still around, so. Who needs logical characterisation, anyway? For all that Kara complains about feeling out of balance living two lives, she also spends almost no time living as Kara Danvers instead of Supergirl in this season (especially the second half); remember when her job as a reporter used to matter to character or story, like, at all? Remember when actually being seen to balance things was a source of narrative conflict and development? Now, if she had discovered that surviving part of Krypton near the BEGINNING of the season instead of in the fourth-last episode, maybe she could have spent the season having, I dunno, a sort of character arc about dealing with it? Selena and the relevant mythology on the world-killers and the ways to kill them/make them/whatever could have all been introduced in earlier parts of the season so that they could BUILD THE FUCKING NARRATIVE instead of just throwing in convenient new plot devices and information at the last second? Maybe the whole story could have been improved by making it actually about the character the series is named after, and analysing her still-developing relationship with her identity and its duality? It’s such a fucking obvious character arc I want to punch something. How, HOW was this not what the whole season was about? How did we end up futzing around with Mon-El and pointless future-visitors and extra antagonists who didn’t matter to the season or its characters at all?

If you forgot that they also had some time-wasting with some fanatical cult crap on Earth that mostly just served to provide Kara with yet another character to drop explainers about things instead of having her learn stuff in some kind of plot-related fashion, I could understand; it was pretty forgettable. Alex and Maggie broke up, which was rather sudden and wasteful, really, but at least it was tied to Alex’s realisation that she wants to have children and that constituted one of the only solid character threads of this messy, wishy-washy season (though it also often kept Alex distracted in other parts of the story and not having those all-important sisterly interactions with Kara which formed the backbone of the show in the first season, so, boo for that). J’onn had his dad around for a while, and that was legitimately pretty good stuff (y’all know I’m weak for Martians), though I really hope it has some strong narrative fallout in season four because otherwise it seems like a plot designed to torture J’onn emotionally, as if his story isn’t already tragic enough. They also wasted James less this season? Unfortunately, they wasted Lena more, and I’m especially suspicious of the way they not only strangled the amount of story she spent with Kara as a friend, they also threw in this awkwardly-executed situation with Lena actively disliking Supergirl and turning Kara’s secret into something which jeopardises their future relationship. Their interactions last season were so strong, and the effort to put space between them in this season feels overt (giving Lena a romance with James and a new/old best friend in Samantha contributes to this); I can’t help but wonder if the Powers That Be were upset that they’d accidentally made a female relationship with more chemistry than the canon-lesbian couple (and at the same time as they were badly failing at giving Kara a believable hetero love interest, no less) and decided that breaking up one of their best character partnerships was preferable to anyone reading the hero of the story as anything other than straight. They’ve made so many hugely questionable decisions about Kara’s personal life at this point, no BTS fuckery would surprise me. Remember season one, when the plot had a shape and the characters generally did things for understandable reasons? Those were the days. We’re closer to getting back to them now than we were after the disaster that was last season, but I’m still not banking on the show ever regaining the focused quality which made the first season work so well. To do that, they have to start telling stories about Kara again, at minimum. That would be a start.

[ohthewhomanity]

An immediate emotional response to “The Last Crash of the Sunchaser”

Let me start this by saying that I know these aren’t exactly equivalent experiences, but it’s my personal emotional entry point to the stuff we learned in this episode, so that’s what you’re getting here.

DuckTales spoilers and more than you probably ever wanted to know about my personal life, especially when it comes to the idea of losing one’s mother, under the cut.

When I was nine, my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer. And we just a couple months ago celebrated her reaching thirteen years in remission. We had a bat mitzvah, more family was there together than we’ve had in a very long time, and I cried more that weekend than I can ever remember crying in my life.

Which is significant because during that year of chemo I can’t remember crying all that much. I must have at some point, I suppose, but no sadness or fear really sticks out in my memory, and I wasn’t that young, so it doesn’t really make sense that I would have forgotten.

My parents didn’t hide it from my siblings and me. We were all three still kids, and they told us she was sick, and we knew she was in the hospital quite a bit. When she started losing her hair, we all took a turn helping Dad to shave her head. She never wore a wig. She told me she was going to have surgery that would get rid of her breasts, and apparently my response was, “It’s okay if you lose your soft parts, because I can still put my head on your belly.”

It’s only since I graduated high school - maybe because Mom started talking more frankly about it with me, or maybe I finally had the emotional awareness in hindsight - only in these last five years that how big and hard it must have all been has hit me. At the time, somehow, my parents took what could justifiably have been seen as the end of the world (my mother is so much of my world) and kept it all seeming as mundane as possible.

As Mom nearly died, life went on. My parents are teachers and we live in the U.S., I know we didn’t have a ton of money to dump on healthcare. But (to use Scrooge’s phrase), they spared no expense. External family must have chipped in. We still went to summer camp that year. Thanks to Dad, we still had familiar home-cooked food and clean laundry and were walked to the bus stop every day.

I read articles online sometimes about people angsting over the decision to get rid of your breasts when you have cancer, but for my mom it was never a choice. None of that was a choice. She was going to be there for us as we grew up, we were going to have a normal life, that was the most important thing.

So to be honest I’m pretty darn angry with Della Duck. I keep typing and retyping the next sentence and it isn’t coming out quite right. What I’m trying to say is that it bothers me, but it bothers me in a way that I know is very real because real people do do this, that this mother would put anything over being there for her children.

I mean, we know that Della on some level knew that she was doing something wrong (the note said “I’m sorry,” after all, not “thanks for the spaceship” or “this is gonna be awesome” or anything like that, and I hope we get to learn more about her thought process at the time). But she still did it. She chose some potential for incredible over preserving the mundane reality. When, like theopalauthority says in their great post, the kids didn’t need stars, they needed their mom.

And I know, I really do know, that these aren’t the same things, but I keep coming back to how my mother has scars on her chest. She didn’t make any vain efforts to keep her body or her life the way it was before. She chose to put herself through what she has since described to me as a living hell in order to make sure that I would be able to put my head on her belly for years to come.

And the worst nightmare I’ve had in my adult life is the one in which the cancer came back and my mom chose differently.

(I told her about this nightmare when I had it. I’m okay, she’s okay, we had a good conversation about it. I hadn’t really thought about it in a while until watching DuckTales this morning. And people wonder why I think stories have so much power. :P)

I think the boys are going to have to put some blame for the scenario on Della, which is really hard to do on your dead mom, especially when the dude who fricking made the spaceship is standing right there being a grumpy old ass choosing to hurt you instead of let anyone see that he feels guilt and grief. Because for a lot of people it’s easier to retreat into familiar pain than to let in a new good thing. That’s another very real thing that this show depicts very well: Scrooge thinks being alone and letting the world see him as awful is easier than facing grief together as a family.

It’s really easy to be angry back at someone who shows you anger. Hence everyone putting their blame on Scrooge. There will be redemption in mutual vulnerability, in everyone recognizing the one cheesy thing this show is built on and will never say in so many words, that family is the greatest adventure.

And now I guess we just... wait a week until we find out if Lena’s okay? I mean I know there’s a lot to worry about in the week to come but we haven’t seen her in a really long time and I have my priorities darn it

[athenagrantnash]

Hi! I was wondering if you could explain what you mean about Eddie being misogynistic? I just started watching (like. Season One. Chimney just got speared through the head this is WILD) and I know he’s coming but if he sucks real bad I don’t want to get too attached to either him or the show, yknow? Thanks!

Okay so I do want to preface this by saying like... I have no intention of controlling who or what you do or do not like.

If you like eddie I might personally judge your opinions because they are so radically different from my own, but I strongly believe that as long as you are not hurting people, bullying people, or being a terrible person over your like/dislike of a character that that like/dislike should be respected.

I went over some of the basics here, but basically every single time eddie has any sort of relationship with a woman he treats her like shit.

Spoilers ahead (since you're only on season 1) under the cut.

Before I go on, yes I know that he has "relationships" with [insert random female character here]. He has interacted with May and Linda at dispatch and he has female family members that he is not a complete pig towards. However, that doesn't change the fact that several of the women who he interacts with in, particularly every single character he has a romantic connection to, he treats like garbage.

Also? You don't have to be awful to every single woman that you associate with to be a misogynist.

So in season 2 we are introduced to eddie's wife Shannon. The relationship was EXTREMELY unhealthy, but a lot of what made it unhealthy was eddie's fault. He wasn't honest with her, he used her, he accused her of trying to buy back their son when she thought they were working on reconciling with each other, among other things.

Also (and I don't remember if we find out these details in s2 or s3?) but eddie re-joined the army SPECIFICALLY because he could not handle his son's disability. So during the time in her life when she needed him most, he left her. He left her to take care of their son on her own, which was especially difficult because of his disability and because of how much she blamed herself for it. And he left her for FIVE YEARS to finish his tour, when he could have been there with her during that entire time.

At the end of that when he finally comes home, she asks him to come with her while she goes to take care of her dying mother. He refuses, SPECIFICALLY because he does not want to spend X many hours in the car with his disabled son. So she leaves to take care of her mom by herself. And she leaves their son with him because... the point is that she's going to take care of her dying mother. Which means that is what needs her full attention, which means that even if her son did not have a disability she would not have taken him with her. And then because of all the shit eddie put her through, she couldn't bring herself to come back. (side note: the fandom's vilification of her for this is equally disgusting).

And the cherry on top of all of this, is that eddie gives her shit for it. Sure, he'll defend her to his parents at her goddamn funeral, but the way he treated her for it was foul to say the least.

His actions towards Shannon were disgusting, and if this was the only incident I could chalk it up to the relationship being extremely unhealthy and him making bad choices.

But oh no.

It doesn't stop there.

Enter Lena.

Lena joins the 118 briefly in season 3 and she becomes friends with eddie. He's a bit of a mess because Shannon has just died, but once again he displays the exact same actions towards Lena that he did towards Shannon. He confided in her about his issues, used her to get what he wanted, and didn't even consider trying to learn anything about her. (tbh I hated this plot and didn't like Lena that much and I LOVED Shannon so I don't remember all exactly that he did, but long story short he took and took and took from her, he used her, and he wouldn't give anything back.)

Relationships with women, to eddie, are a one way street. It's all about what she can do for him, and the second he is expected to give anything back he removes that woman from his life.

And finally, enter Ana.

Ignoring all the obvious retconing that went on with that dynamic, eddie: 1) had panic attacks over a woman/over the idea that he would have to give back to her as much as she is giving to him if the relationship gets any more serious 2) explicitly said that he wants to avoid breaking up with her because she's been so helpful in being a free babysitter for his kid.

Once again, he takes and takes and takes but the second he is confronted with the idea of having to put effort into giving to the relationship, he removes the woman from his life.

[gyroshrike]

“I trusted you. You said I could trust you. Why would you choose to save me when you could have saved everyone else?”

Huge spoilers for Dying Light under the cut. I highly recommend not reading if you haven’t played.

(There’s also fanfiction down there.)

Because I live an an au where Rahim doesn’t die.

Here, Crane ends up ditching the explosives in order to take Rahim back to the Tower. He’s infected now, but at least he’s alive. Cue the guilt. Omar died following Rahim’s plan. The explosives were wasted. The nest still stands. And now Rahim is one of the many taking from their already dangerously low Antizin reserve. And he has nothing to show for it.

Rahim was sitting out on the roof again. He was looking at the nest. Again.

“Rahim.” Kyle saw Rahim quickly run a sleeve over his eyes at the sound of his name. Just like last time. It gave Kyle an uneasy feeling in his stomach. This scene felt too familiar. Before, it had been the precursor to a bad decision, the loss of a runner, and almost Rahim’s life.

Rahim turned, sloppy grin plastered on his face, beer lazily in his hand.

“Craaaaaane,” he drawled, sounding too much like a college boy greeting a frat brother.

Kyle allowed himself to get distracted for a moment, “Didn't we learn that beer and the roof don't go together?” He teased as he approached, crossing his arms and looking pointedly at Rahim. The memory of a drunken Rahim stepping too far backward and almost plunging off of the roof flashed across Kyle’s mind.

With a mouth open, ready to retort, Rahim made a show of peeking over the lip of the roof, but the resulting wobble interrupted anything he was going to say.

That same wobble sent Kyle’s stomach into his throat and he had half way closed the gap between them when Rahim recovered, laughing nervously. He caught sight of Kyle poised to grab him and gave a heartier laugh.

“See? Look at you. You would have caught me,” Rahim said, but rolled back from the ledge all the same, losing sloshes of his beer out of his can as he went. He stayed like that, laying in the dust of the rooftop, trying to balance the can on his goggles while staring up at the sky.

With his heart still thundering in his chest, Kyle took a slow, calming - albeit exasperated - breath. Back to business.

“I heard you had a seizure today.” Rahim didn't respond, but grew very still and stopped fiddling with his can. Kyle knew Rahim heard him. “And you didn't take any Antizin.”

“You don't know that,” Rahim stubbornly mumbled.

Kyle didn't catch it. “What?”

Rahim picked his head up, letting the empty can fall and tumble away, “You don't know that!” He projected from his spot on the floor.

“Dr. Lena told me she hasn't given out any doses today.”

“Dr. Zere has some too, you know,” Rahim shot back after letting his head fall back to the ground.

“Rahim,” Kyle stressed in that bewildered way that tacked on an unspoken ‘Come on, why are you acting this way?’ at the end of it. Rahim still didn't look at him, pointedly turning his head away.

“It was a short one. I'm fine.”

“Wha-” Kyle stuttered, “Rahim, what if you turn?” he asked, confusion at Rahim’s casual tone evident in his voice.

“It takes more than one little seizure before you turn. I'll be fine,” Rahim assured again, “We have that raid tomorrow. I'll take some after.” Rahim pushed himself up, elbows resting on his now crossed legs. Either something on the opposite side of the tower deeply interested him or he was pointly avoiding looking in Kyle's direction.

The raid Rahim was referring to was a small storage house found to be guarded by Rais’ men. Scouts reported their presence repeatedly over the course of multiple days, so whatever was in there, was staying there. The suspicion was that it was a backup cache of provisions and with any luck, Antizin as well.

“Fine,” Kyle relented after an irritated sigh through his nose. So, Rahim wanted to be difficult? Fine. “What if you have another seizure on the mission?” Kyle could push right back. “You could jeopardize the whole thing. Rahim, you know how much we need that Antizin-”

“Then why didn't you just let me die?” Rahim snarled, rounding suddenly. “Why not just let me turn?” As if a whirlwind swept him from the ground, Rahim stood and closed in on Kyle.

Taken aback, Kyle choked on any potential response. Rahim didn't wait for him to recover.

“Then I wouldn't be here on this fucking rooftop, needing Antizin, Antizin we don't have and that nest…” Rahim's voice broke right as he jabbed a hand in the direction of a very much intact building, a building they very much knew was infested with volatiles, “That nest,” he tried to say again, but it came out even more strangled than before. He took breath and the tremble left his voice. “Crane, I trusted you. You said I could trust you.”

“To what? Let you die?” Kyle couldn't help interrupting in disbelief.

“To know what your priorities are!” Rahim jerked the same arm in the general direction of the volatile nest again as he spoke, face contorting in anguish before then gesturing to himself, “To not chose me!”

Chest heaving, Rahim became very interested in the scenery again, looking around as if he suddenly didn’t know what to do with himself.

Kyle’s heart clenched painfully. To see Rahim standing before him suffering so much... He closed the already short gap between them, prepared to act, but what was he even going to do? What was he going to say? Rahim just looked up at him with glassy eyes.

A moment passed, two. Slowly, Rahim lowered his head to rest on Kyle’s shoulder. A fist raised at Rahim’s side, but whatever fire was driving him before had burned out. When he brought the fist down there was no force behind it and it hit Kyle’s chest with a soft tap.

Surprised at the sudden contact, Kyle took a step back.

“Why?” Rahim almost whispered, “Why would you choose to save me? When you could have saved everyone else?”

[nebulawriter]

Annhilation

This is as close to a Changeling: The Lost movie as we’re ever going to get, isn’t is?

Overview: Smart movie, I probably want to watch it exactly once more to try and figure out some details, but it’s definitely more of a think-y movie than a sit-down-and-enjoy-stuff movie. But it IS imaginitive, visually stunning, thematically cohesive, and...a little horrifying. Like. More horrifying than I am traditionally comfortable with. 

Note: this review turned more film analysis-ish than even I intended, so I apologize to those on mobile.

Like, as much of a sci-fi nerd as I am, sci fi horror stuff is almost always too much for me. I just can’t handle the gore and jump scares. Because of this, I don’t have INCREDIBLE experience with this kinda genre stuff, so I don’t have a good measuring stick to judge this as well. 

In fact, I MIGHT have not seen this one all together if it weren’t for a) the all-lady cast, b) Tessa Thompson c) the weird shiny fantasy look to everything and d) I have moviepass now and it doesn’t cost me any extra to go to it. 

I think I should do brief summary in case you’re reading this without seeing it for some reason, but uh, SPOILERS. Lena is a former soldier turned biology professor whose husband stayed in the military and went MIA (arguably KIA) about a year ago. And she’s not over it. Then, *GASP* he comes home, but he’s super out of it and sick, and he and she are both immediately captured by weird agents. There, a psychologist named Ventress shows her the Shimmer, a place off the coast that’s changing weird stuff, and no matter what they send in, nothing comes out. Except Lena’s husband Kane. She meets a team of cool lady scientists who are going in, and signs up, hoping to find a cure for her husband. They go in, there’s weird mind-fuckery, there is constant debate over if this is really happening or if they’re going insane, Lena finds clues left by her husband, 2 people get eaten by a bear, one person....turns into a tree I think? And finally they reach the lighthouse, the center of the incidents. Dr, Ventress explodes?ish? and then theres a LOOOOOT of mindfuckery, and I think I get like....60% of it? but, in the end, the lighthouse gets burned down and the shimmering stops. Kinda. 

So! Annhilation. I’m going to go broad and whittle down for the review, going from themes into characters and plot. Annhilation is about one particular concept really that, like all good sci-fi, is over-exaggerated into the fantastical. Today’s concept is Self-Destruction. Specifically this gets focused onto cancer and suicide, and both of these themes are sot of....mutated together, not unlike the creatures in this film. I know it wasn’t but I really hope the shark-crocodile was in the pitch for this movie, like “It’s a think piece movie with a mutant shark crocodile. Money please.”

See, there’s a weird thing about Self-destruction, mirrored in this film, of, is it outside forces, or was it internal, something inside you? And that is the question this movie continues to pose, is the cause internal, or external? 

Now lets look at the characters. The team, minus Lena, was chosen because they all had issues in their lives, and so were not going to be too terrible to lose in the likely event they died going into the shimmer, just like all the previous teams were chosen (this is important)

We’ll go in death-order, starting with Cass, and....kinda Anya. Cass clearly lost a daughter to Leukimia. There’s a story in here that I don’t know if I just caught onto subtext, or missed the reveal, but I’m 70% sure her partner at the time was in fact Anya, (Anya’s canonically wlw, Cass mocks her for hitting on Lena, maybe a bit too passive aggressively, Anya was most distressed by Cass’s death) Now, Anya’s problem was drinking and drugs, likely taken up after their daughter’s death. Through that, Cass left her, and now they’re on this mission together, and likely going to die. So there we have, self destruction before now. Their daughter’s death: External, outside of their control. Anya’s drinking, though, is her choice, how she chose to handle it: Internal. Cass leaving Anya, leaving them both completely alone: Internal. Kind of. 

Cass’s fear she talked about with Lena, getting her to choose to come out first when Lena and Ventress sense trouble. Internal, her choice, almost, but a reasonable one. The bear eating her, obviously External. 

Then, Anya becomes a villain of the piece, blaming Lena for Cass’s death. Internal choice, she suspects Lena, going through her things. External, she finds out Lena HAS been lying about her connection to the soldier Kane, and could very well have gone insane and been the one to kill Cass. Internal choice: She ties up her teammates, trying to determine if they’re crazy, but now we have an interesting pickle, don’t we. Are they crazy, or is SHE crazy for tying them up. 

In my opinion, neither, while they’re all under enormous amounts of stress, and their bodies are LITERALLY changing, it doesn’t seem to be having a direct influence on their sanity. there is logic in Anya’s actions, and Lena’s and everyone’s. but it just...clashes in traumatic ways. 

Finally, Anya hears Cass’ voice. External. She goes to chase it. Internal. It’s actually a horrifying bear monster that eats her. External. 

Moving onto Josie. In a team full of scientists, she’s the nerd, which is sweet, but she’s also overly shy and doesn’t much speak up. Cass informs Lena, and us, that she has self-harm scars on her arms. This is pretty clear-cut (pun not intended I swear) self-destruction. But Cass also states, she wasn’t trying to kill herself. She was trying to live. 

We’re never given a reason for Josie’s self-harm, but...and here’s where it gets a bit personal....as someone who’s struggled with self-harm in the cutting sense, I get it. It’s not about wanting to die. It’s trying to find something to live for. 

Josie throughout the film doesn’t feel like she has that, which is why she’s chosen for the assignment. 

Her fate is the....least clear, though its heavily implied she turns into one of the plant people, a statue. In this sense, she gets to live. She chooses this fate, in some ways, choosing to become part of the shimmering world rather than die in it like Cass and Anya. I think. There’s also her decision to save Lena by killing the weird demon bear, an internal choice, which I’m guessing plays into that, but. thats a bit more detailed for me. 

Now, Dr. Ventress. Ventress is the psychologist who’s been sending people into the shimmer, choosing people who fit the profile of nothing to lose, choosing them, and sending each and every one of them to die. Internal choice, causing extreme guilt. Then, she gets cancer. Sort of an external force. Kinda. Cancer is a weird disease, really. It’s not something attacking you, going in, ripping out your guts and destroying you. No, it’s...it’s you. Its your body, just....making more of itself, doing it’s job to keep you living, but it works overtime, taking over the REST of your body, until it destroys itself. Its a scary condition Hollywood LOVES to use, because it is TERRIFYING and REAL to the general public. Almost everyone knows someone whose had some type of cancer. For me, my mother had Thyroid cancer, and to this day, I am at risk of that from having genes with her, not to mention having ovarian cysts that could turn into cancer if I don’t monitor it and control it. You wanna know how they confirm and monitor your ovarian cysts? Its Not. Pleasant. Everyone has seen the way Cancer destroys lives, and if I were to put money on it, I’d guess one or multiple of the creators of this movie has seen it too. 

Anyway, VENTRESS. She’s going to die no matter what, so she decides to lead this exposition and find the cause of all this craziness thats been killing the people she chooses. Internal choice. She pushes onward, no matter the deaths of her comrades until she reaches the lighthouse.

And then. Weird. Fucking. Shit. Happens. She...finds the source of all this...ish. An alien comet. Kind of. And she says it’s....inside her...the annhilation. AND THEN SHE FUCKING EXPLODES. AND IMPLODES. Sort of both? A light comes out of her and she like...is made into this fiery ball of changing cells and. I don’t. What the fuck. 

*ahem* whatever the fuck that was, I think a combination of implosion and explosion kinda ties back to internal vs external cause pretty decently. 

Now, Kane and Lena. At the beginning, we’re shown that they had a wonderful marriage, full of smiles and happiness. But....later through flashbacks we’re shown...not necessarily so great. Kane is gone a lot on assignment. This leads Lena to having an affair. Kane finds out and gets assigned to the shimmer assignment. So is it Lena’s fault Kane went? Kane’s fault for Lena’s affair? In the end, neither of them, of course, are fully capable of the other’s actions, but, there’s a contributing factor. Internal choices combined with External forces. 

We only see clips of Kane’s mission, film he left behind. In the first film, what I think happens because I couldn’t watch all of it, was him cutting open one of his teammates, right in the stomach. Once it’s open, we see....something....moving inside the man. Anya’s convinced it’s a trick of the light, and that Kane went insane. While it’s true that he never explains himself, like I said, beyond stress we don’t see much indication that these people are “crazy” or hallucinating or anything. The man being cut doesn’t scream, he knows what’s going to happen. Kane and the other living soldier are Concerned. More likely, they were getting footage of what was moving in him as data, data that later teams could hopefully find. 

Now as for what the thing WAS??? I’m not sure. Partially because I was COVERING MY EYES CAUSE A GUY WAS BEING CUT OPEN but partially because I think it could be one of 2 things: 1, a snake that had got inside him (external) or 2, his LITERAL ORGANS coming to life (internal)

Lena makes similar observations. She samples her own blood, seeing that it’s being mutated. She convinces Anya and Josie to keep pushing ahead, both for logical reasons, and somewhat tricking them, because she still hasn’t found what she wants: answers about what happened to her husband. And oh she gets them. Back to the trippy finale. 

See, she finds a tape of Kane blowing himself up. On this tape he shows far more signs of mental instability, but that makes sense as its then shown that the man behind the camera? Also Kane. A duplicate of him, specifically. The duplicate’s existence seems to cause Kane’s distress, causing him to doubt himself. External force. But he blows up the grenade. Internal choice. Here we come to the suicide aspect. Was it really too much to handle? He professed his love to Lena in the end, so did her affair influence his choice? It certainly caused the duplicate to come to her. 

Finally, Lena gets a duplicate made of herself, after Ventress explode/implodes. It mimics her...imperfectly. She attacks it, it attacks her. Not to mention she passes out several times in the fight, so we, the audience, lose track of her. whenever it 

And in the CLEAREST METAPHOR FOR SELF DESTRUCTION I’ve ever seen Lena (?) EXPLODES HER DUPLICATE. Like???? do I need to explain that one???

Okay now onto the murky ending. Kane is suddenly better! but he says...he doesn’t think he’s Kane, preeetty much confirming he’s the alien created duplicate. And Lena....Lena doesn’t say if she’s the duplicate or the real one. I don’t think she knows. And while the change in her eyes would indicate, no, she’s the duplicate....I’m less sure. Is she Lena, affected and changed by the alien? Or the alien, affected and changed by Lena? Does it matter?

Oh but we’re not done yet. Now, for the last character, who I’m dubbing “Annhilation.” It’s the alien, the cause, the sci-fi part of this film. The alien is....cancer, on the land, almost directly. The comet hits the lighthouse. External force. But....

As “Lena” Says at the end, it....it doesn’t destroy, not really. It changes. It changes what was already there. It mimics, imperfectly. The WORLD is self-destructing itself, the comet is just....the catylyst. like Cancer. It’s your own cells that are actually being destructive.

In the end, Loxam smiles after Lena finishes telling her story. “So, it was aliens.” as if that answers everything. 

And...yes? but it wasn’t....trying to kill. It...started something in the world and killed itself. “What did it want” Loxam asked. Self-Destruction is not that simple. Like, it changed things but...all the destruction, REAL destruction, was either self-inflicted (Kane) or inflicted from the beasts in the world (the bear and crocodile)

Self harm....in any of it’s forms.....is strange. It goes against out biological functions, but....it also goes with them. It doesn’t make logical sense, it never has. But there’s only one way to get through it, if at all possible. It’s how Kane, fake or not, got back. And How Lena got back. 

The others, all of them, had nothing to live for. They were WILLING to be possibly killed on this mission, thats why they were chosen. Lena, though, Lena had a goal. She wanted to get out, She wanted to save her husband. She had something to live for.

I do have a negative thing about this showing of self harm, or....i don’t know, maybe a thing I’m not clear on. All throughout, destruction is...made beautiful. sorta. Bodies are arranged in patterns, plants grow out the sides of crumbled buildings and...i don’t know....how I feel about that.....I just. I don’t know. 

ANYWAY in conclusion, very well done movie, if a bit confusing at times, Glad one of the poc didn’t die first, though was sad the lesbians also died. though. They kinda all died. so. at least we got the representation at all? 

So yeah. Sorry for the book report, but I hope it was mildly entertaining?

[intrepidmare]

My observations watching… 3x1 Edition — Supergirl, The Flash, Legends of Tomorrow

I’m a little late with these, but here it is anyway. I need start saying that these shows are coming strong this season! So far, I’m really liking what they’re doing with each. I know it’s early and things can go to hell anytime between now and May, but if this keep up, then my faith and trust in the writers will be fully restored. 

Let’s get to the good stuff (spoilers after the cut)

SUPERGIRL 3x02 “Triggers”

Wow! I simply loved this episode! Kudos to the writers because they kept the path of Kara still dealing with her grieve, and didn’t magically made her feel better and well-adjusted in only a week. I think they’re doing brilliantly Kara going from to be closed to her feelings completely, to her acknowledging and dealing with them slowly. I’m loving that even if it’s putting us through 10 kinds of pain. 

They ripped my heart out and stumped on it when Kara found the book under her bed with Mon-El’s annotations. Damn! That was cruel! But not as awful as when Kara got the panic attacks, reliving her departure from Krypton, being enclosed in the pod. I should be horrified that Kara was blaming herself for Mon-El’s “death”, but I already knew that, like I said in last week’s review. So no big surprise there. 

The scenes with Alex were amazing!! Really touching. Well, the scenes between them are always good, but this week, they exceeded the norm.

What I didn’t expect was the tension between Lena and James, but I kinda liked it. Definitely, it’s gonna be interesting how that plays out in the coming episodes. 

I can’t stop liking and getting emotionally attached to Sam so when she turns into Reign will hit me harder, right? Because that’s happening. Not that much with the daughter tho. ‘Cause honestly, the stunt she did of putting herself in danger so her mom could rescue her was awful. If she had died, it’d have exclusively Ruby’s fault, no one else’s.

And unfortunately, the kids talk is the beginning of the end for Sanvers. It’s not we’re not forewarned of their end, but it’s sad anyway.

The Flash 4x02 “Mixed Signals”

I’m shocked to say this, but it was really good. I’m still wary of getting my hopes up with this show, but I think they might have a real shot to win me back. Time will tell.

But they have to explain me something. Could it be there a replica of the building where Felicity lives in Central City? Because that was the loft. Filming it from a new angle doesn’t make it new or different, you know And Barry’s hyper-happy mood is a little weird to me. I got the feeling that there’s something there, something that they’re not telling us. 

This episode has extra points because of the easter egg of Oliver’s outing as Green Arrow, and thank you so much Iris for including Snart’s death in the meaningful losses you’ve suffered. Very appreciated.

3x02 “Freakshow”

Awesome episode too! Billy Zane as P.T. Barnum was great. Loved the Titanic  joke, which was not only for Victor Garber, but for Billy Zane too, who was also in the movie. I laughed so hard even when I had already heard the joke in the promo. 

The fight with Sara and Sharpe was so great. Well-choreographed and fun to watch.

My only complaint is to Amaya. Seriously, girl?! I mean I totally get why she went back to 1942 and I respect that she’s trying to protect Mari and all. Even I can go even with not telling Nate, but doing it on his birthday? That’s just a jackass move. You just don’t break people’s hearts on important days. Period. Or you shouldn’t.

Now I wonder if this good episodes streak will continue tonight with Arrow. I hope so.

@almondblossomme // @arrowolicity88 // @athena3291998 // @bitchwhwifi // @blackleather77 // @broken-canary // @coal000 // @emarasmoak // @hope-for-olicity // @jaspertown // @jeymien // @juliakaze // @laurabelle2930 // @ms-jane-darcy // @taurusclh // @wherethereissmoak // @lovelycssefan // @vaelisamaza​ //

[paladinquen]

Reactions to the GoT Season 7 finale

Under a cut for spoilers (if you’re on mobile and want to avoid spoilers, just ignore this post).

1. AEGON???????!! THEY WENT THERE! I know this is because there’s no Aegon in the show, so Jon doesn’t have a half-brother named Aegon but...it throws up some questions for me in terms of F-Aegon? 

2. Why the fuck is Viserion like...30x faster as a dead dragon than he was when he was alive? Everyone else that died and got brought back (with the exception of Benjen) are slow as molasses. 

3. They really had to do the Targaryen reveal right on top of the boat-sex scene didn’t they? FFS guys, why can’t Jon just be allowed to be happy? “I’m finally in love again! What do you mean she’s my Aunt?” I wonder how Dany will feel about not having the right after all and since she didn’t grow up with Targ incest how in line with that she is. (Omg Tormund being like ‘the Queen who fucks her brother?’ well Tor, your buddy has a similar descriptor now).

4. Tyrion - I guess he did love her. It would have been hilarious if Jorah was also in the back there like ‘dude, I know’

5. I wonder what Pod and Bronn spoke about at the pub?

6. Jaime finally leaving Cersei - fighting side-by-side with Brienne! Meeting Tormund. I’m so there for that. I also expect he will die (Jaime).

7. Theon - I admit that my dislike of Theon is so high that none of the Ramsay torture ever turned my heart soft for him (I just wanted Theon to die because any scene with him was a waste, also torture porn is so unnecessary). But man...I shed a tear when he spoke to Jon and fought the dude for Yara. I still don’t like him, but fucking hell, 7 seasons was a long time to wait for any kind of redemption.

8. It’s easier for Jon to forgive Theon for murdering Bran and Rickon now that he knows it didn’t happen. Doesn’t end the sacking of Winterfell and betraying of Robb.

9. Oh thank goodness the Sansa v Arya mess was them messing with Littlefinger. They learned after that dumb Bravos Arya got stabbed thing.

10. Jon does cause an issue by bending the knee though. Not just in terms of losing the truce (that Cersei was never going to keep) but also the North? Sansa’s anger was justified.

11. I couldn’t really see Rhaegar? His hair was all over the place hahaha. I guess the point was for him to resemble Viserys.

12. Back to Jaime - that last scene where his expression was basically ‘you’ve well and truly lost your mind...you have honestly lost your mind’ but still trying to reason with her. Damn he really does love her.

13. Sandor looks absolutely unsurprised that his brother is a zombie.

14. That smile Varys has when Cersei ‘agrees’ to the truce the first time is kind of amusing.

15. I guess Sam didn’t react to ‘Prince Raggar’ because at that point he didn’t realize that Rhaegar is Jon’s father.

16. I wanna see that Arya and Gendry reunion.

17. Theon may be slightly redeemed but I honestly hope this story doesn’t end with Yara dying and him being the Lord of the Iron Islands. He doesn’t deserve *that* much redemption and the men who followed Yara and Euron (most follow Euron) wouldn’t follow him anyway. I can see him serving on Yara’s council or whatnot but that’s it.

18. I thoroughly disagree with the line ‘it’s all about cocks in the end’ fuck that. This episode kind of agreed and disagreed with itself on that for a time (Theon wins his fight because he has no cock, we know that Greyworm and Missandei have their ‘family’, Jaime’s cock got him the most twisted family ever). 

19. The brilliant acting between Lena Headey and Peter Dinklage. One of the things I miss the most from earlier seasons is these two interacting. The hatred, the undeniable aspect of family. How much do you want to bet Tyrion already loves the unborn niece/nephew (is there a gender-neutral term for this yet)? 

20. Wait...Tyrion and Sansa reunion coming next season! 

21. Sam still doesn’t know about his dad and brother.

22. Littlefinger - I’m glad this plot finally played out but I wish there was a letter or something that served as physical proof, not just Bran being like ‘yeah you betrayed our Dad’. Like yes we know Bran can see things but the Vale? etc? I dunno. 

23. Does this mean Littlefinger hired the catspaw?

24. Thank goodness this was a better episode than the last! Man that would have been hard but I’m not putting anything past them and their indifference now.

25. And now a more than year-long wait for the last 6 episodes. Let’s see

[tinnefoil]

I have no opinion on the fandom kerfuffle aspect of it. Again, don’t complain about antis having no life and then actually seek out what they are saying. Don’t be like them. Block/Report/Disable/Expose if they are seeking you out. 

Having said that: 

Some thoughts about the current spoilers going around. This time actually under the cut because obvious reasons. 

1.) Somebody really needs to tell Ken that it’s not a heroic sacrifice if it’s about saving your own hide ;) I kid, I kid, don’t contact Ken, he was just speculating off what he saw and apparently he didn’t catch that Mon-El was injured. 

2.) IF it’s true that Rhea dies then that “happy end” person has some really, really, really weird ideas about what constitutes a happy end for a character. BTW, if Rhea dies from the poison, that’s pretty damn dark. I wonder if the whole silly arranged marriage plot was also a way to ensure that Lena knew there are nice Daxamites too/to make it clear that Lena knows that Mon-El has relevance to her friend Kara. So it’s not a situation of “she didn’t know”. 

3.) What I really want to know is whether Mon-El finds out in this episode that his mother killed his father. I also will feel very cheated that we don’t get to see anything along the lines of Mon-El cradling his dead mother’s body. 

4.) I’d love for there to be an epic Kara/Cat comfort scene. Yes I know Alex is first choice, but Kara and Cat having been talking a lot about these events and I could picture Kara not wanting to ruin Alex’s happiness. 

5.) I reserve bitching about comic book logic plotholes (again like: does Winn know lead is not healthy for humans either? how does the phantom zone work again? Why isn’t it sufficient to just put Mon-El into a quarantine room with an airfilter?) till after the episode has aired. 

6.) Somebody (Kreisberg?) said we would get glimpses of next season’s big bad in the finale. What’s up with that? 

(btw, if Mon-El doesn’t find out about Lar Gand in this episode, that would be an interesting built in drama, like maybe when he is freed, he is pretty pissed and vengeful at first, before Kara tells him about his father)