#ultramoorines

[moulong]

How I describe Ventris to other people:

and Ventris actually looks like:

[moociaoafterdark]

Cow!Cato... Being milked by a chatty Milkmaid Serf..............

[wolf-tail]

The Lord Primarch welcomes Captain Cato Sicarius back into the Ultramarines after his time lost in the Warp

*Points to Roboute* Cow

*Points to Ultramarines* His calves

[cognitivemania]

I think @wolf-tail said something about ultramoorines having salt likers. Then I recalled that cows can eat sugar (sugarcanes, not the ones we buy).

Also, does the bull of ultramar have any sort of gene flaw identical to the space wolves? Do they grow horns? Get a new pair of ears? (or get their current ones turned into cattle ones?) do they grow a tail? Can they ahem...lactate? Can guiliman be capable of that?

Anywho back to what I was rambling about— Sugar cubes the size of astertes jawbreakers that they can swallow whole and savour it until it disintegrates. If feel like Cato would replace the sugar with salt but that's just me.

Humans have upper teeth, cows do not, that's gotta lead to a bunch of missing teeth, unless they eat a sugarcane like how you normally should instead of eating the whole thing.

But then again they're astartes.

[angronsjewelbeetle]

What a good ultramoorine :3

[wolf-tail]

It's nice to know that my random goofy shitpost about ultramarines being cows has had such a monumentous fandom ripple effect

The ultraMOOrines! This chart is based on @moociaoafterdark ‘s blog🐄

[grimdark-raccoon]

The Bull of Ultramar

Here's the cleaned up version.

Thanks to @cosmic-cryptid-from-beyond for this excellent idea. The ultramoorines symbol will forever look like bull horns from now on.

[moociaoafterdark]

Oh, no, don't worry! They're not with Chaos! They're just UltraMOOrines! Moo! 🐮🐮🐮

[wolf-tail]

WE GOT A CONTAINMENT BREACH

I REPEAT

THE WALL HAS BEEN BREACHED

NOW IS THE TIME, BOVINEPOST ON REDDIT

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

A blood Goose angel and an Ultramoorine

[moociaoafterdark]

Leandros recently have been found with kid you say? Who's the daddy 👀

(TW: OOC Marneus Calgar, Crack Ship)

(Based on the ultramoorines AU, therefore had to use Severus)

[moociaoafterdark]

(WIP) The ultrabovine husbands in their war gear. Very very WIP, as A LOT of details and equipment (like Tigi's staff) will be added later down the line, but for now.... ye Based on this post

[moociaoafterdark]

Out-of-context thing that I think you guys need to know: Cato is a cow. Not literally... Well, not really. It's hard to explain

Came up with the AU where the Ultramarines have a genetic flaw, but currently ovulating, so, of course, this genetic flaw is something extremely horny and eyebrow raising. I'm not telling that shit, I'll wait until my ovulation passes and I can think straight again.

[moociaoafterdark]

Ultramarine Gene Flaw AU: Farm edition.

You thirsty bastards look what you did. You read the tittle. You heard of UltraMOOrines before. You know what you're about to read. The genetic flaw of the Ultramarines is that they're essentially cattle. Not just "GW's cash cows" kind of cattle. Not just "Throw enough Ultramarines at the problem and hope that will solve it" kind of cattle. They have cow/bull like features. It is mostly tied to their behavior. In this AU, they're much more likely to act out and be aggressive (something that may or may not be canon?? idk, I know Robu's geneseed is one of the purest ones). However, they're also way more protective of each other, as well as being more likely to be friendly with humans (unless they piss the Ultramoorines off). They do have other changes, though. The Ultramarines are split into two types: bulls and cows. Bulls usually stand out because of their increased height (being taller than their battle brothers), as well as being more aggressive, something that they learn how to temper. Some also may grow tiny numbs on their head, that if left untreated may turn into horns. This is often mistaken as a sign of corruption, but in reality, those horns are completely harmless and don't indicate anything. A bull Ultramarine may choose to surgically remove them, or, he may choose to keep them to use in combat. In those cases, they are equipped with specialized helmets, that allow for full head protection and coverage, but leave the horns poking out. Bulls are also noted to be the only Astartes capable of reproduction, albeit with their fellow battle brothers, cows in particular. Cows usually look no different from other Astartes, though they also can grow out horns, just like bulls, but this is a much rarer occurrence. In case a cow chooses to keep the horns, he also will be provided with a modified helmet. Cow Ultramarines are capable of lactation and the milk, as well as its consumption, has become an important part of the Chapter's culture. Sampling milk from one's battle brother is a very delicate and intimate process. Usually, though, it is gathered by the serfs and, in more notable cases, Apothecary, and is redistributed to the rest of the Chapter. Considering that the large quantity of milk in his chest makes the Ultramarine uncomfortable and feel heavy, he is more than happy to share milk. The milk of a cow Ultramarine is extremely nutritious and was proved to increase Astartes' healing capabilities. This is why cows, despite what one may think, are really valued as battle brothers. The cows are also still seen as Space Marines, therefore they are expected to and are sent to engage in combat. Cows are also capable of pregnancy, though they only can get impregnated by the bulls. The newborns are usually born as extremely promising, physically strong and in great health, meaning the Ultramarines and their Chapters are never in shortage of new possible recruits. Boys that were born from cow Ultramarines are also notably more likely to survive the grueling process of being converted into an Astartes. It is after birth that a cow's aggression levels rise significantly, which can only be explained by a supposed "maternal instinct" built into their genome. *ehem* So, which one of the Ultraboys is who? (the ones I can name from the top of my head)

Marneus Calgar - bull, of course. Did not remove his horns. Agemman Severus - bull. Removes his horns. Varro Tigurius - cow, of course. Also did not remove his horns. Has given birth to at least a couple of kids by now. guess who the father is Cato Sicarius - cow, much to everyone's surprise. Doesn't remove his horns in order to pretend to be bull. Haven't given birth to a kid... yet. Uriel Ventris - cow. Removes his horns regularly. Unknown if he has any children. Demetrian Titus - bull. Used to keep his horns, but after his time in the Deathwatch, got a habit to regularly remove them instead. Leandros - cow. Removes his horns. Was recently found to be with a child. Gadriel - cow. Doesn't remove his horns. Chairon - bull. Doesn't remove his horns. (honorable mention) Malum Caedo - bull. Removes his horns, surprisingly. Maybe he really likes his bird aesthetic? What of Ultrapeepaw himself, Roboute Guilliman? He got the best (and worst) of both worlds ~

@twerk4macragge @robot-roadtrip-rants THERE, YOU HAPPY NOW?

[angronsjewelbeetle]

Idea: Ultramarines wearing cowbells, Roboute too.

Agreed and accepted.

Idea: Ultramoorines and eartags.

[wolf-tail]

*Points to Roboute* Cow

*Points to Ultramarines* His calves