#uh. should i tag this as jewish

[thetisming]

are these too specific

[applebees4prez]

excited to watch hsmtmts but also. SO DONE with the love triangles and from the one clip i’ve watched i already know we’re getting another one

[is-the-fire-real]

When I was last on tumblr, it was ten years ago and one of the biggest faux pas you could commit was incorrect tagging.

It was Literally Colonialism to use a tag that was For Certain Oppressed Groups. The actually-autistic tag was created because allistics "took over" the autism tag, and this/other tags became heavily policed by users to make sure they remained a "safe space".

I remember seeing countless posts about how autistics would never be safe if we didn't have a bubble to protect us from interacting with allistics. The same went for tags about transliness and queerness. The going approach used militarized and hyperbolic language to characterize and other folks who weren't in the community: autistics (the group I had the most direct experience with) were attacked by allistic invaders who violated and conquered autistic tagging systems.

The "Literally Colonialism" isn't a joke. I saw plenty of suggestions that to even use a tag which was perceived as being "not yours" was colonization of ideas and thoughts. To be allistic, have an opinion on autism, and tag it as "autism" was held up as being exactly the same as the behavior of empires and nation-states.

Obviously, I don't entirely agree, and don't think this particular hyperbolization is helpful for advocacy or for dialogue. But I do find it interesting how, in the decade since I was last here, it seems to (mostly) still be true that you should only use certain tags if you have a particular identity...

... unless you're not Jewish, in which case feel free to use any and all Judaism-related tags and break the system's meager functionality for Jewish people.

As someone who is using Tumblr to connect to online Judaism, it's daunting to see how many posts under "judaism" are by non-Jews screeching about Israel. Seeing non-Jews openly talk about they tag their posts with gore, rape denial, Holocaust denial, October 7 denial, and other deliberately-triggering material with Jewish-themed tags specifically to make Jewish users of Tumblr feel unsafe. Reading them telling each other about how this is advocacy, this will absolutely win the war for Gazans, and how anybody who blocks them (in order to make sure the tags can actually work as intended) is a genocidal coward. Using that self-same militaristic language to describe their activities, only instead of criticizing, they're bragging.

It's, uh, kind of fucked up.

Imagine going to the actually-autistic tag and finding nothing but a wall of allistics claiming that they've victoriously conquered the tag from those inhuman monsters pretending to have problems when other Real People are the ones who are suffering. I think we would all intuitively understand that this would be Wrong. Even if there was some supposed outward justification for being mad at certain autistics, we would understand that holding all autistics everywhere responsible for it is wrong. That breaking a community's ability to talk to each other is wrong. That trying to trigger people and then telling them to commit suicide is wrong.

And we'd also understand, or come to, that the very action of going "This community I'm not part of doesn't deserve to have this tag, I'mma take it back, or at least ruin it so no one else can have it" is an expression of privilege. It is wrong, and it is immature, and it is cowardice.

These smug, self-involved, active attempts at causing harm make no sense at all if seen as advocacy; they help no one, advance no cause, stop no Zionists (whatever that means) from expressing themselves online.

They only make sense when seen as Jew-hate.

[veryace-ficrecs]

Young Justice Fic Recs

This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)

Big girls don't cry by siren_of_the_ocean - Rated G

For Bart Allen, it's a random weekday in the middle of a random year. For Tim Drake, it's the day after his birthday and his whole world had just fallen apart.

Rest and Relaxation Post-Mission by Cherry_Sofa_729 - Rated T

After a mission that leaves everyone in safe condition but exhausted, all of Young Justice decides a little R & R is in order. Granted, when you’re young, together without any supervision, all dating each other, and a bunch of superheroes, a chill night in looks a little different

Dick needs to learn to stop listening when young justice starts talking by allmywritings - Rated T

Dick wished he could stop overhearing the things Young Justice said. At this point, he’d make a deal with the gods. Or://Dick keeps hearing the absolutely wild things that come out of Young Justice's mouths and then has to carry on with his day like there's nothing wrong.

Running in Place by d3ssie_r0se - Rated T

"Tim. How're his vitals?" She forced a calm into her voice. Like her, Tim was almost certainly itching to be out there looking as well. Still, it's not like either of them stood a chance. Cassie maybe, if he wasn't trying. Tim? At the end of the day, Tim was human. "Heartrate and BP through the roof. I can't tell if he's running low blood glucose yet. Both flashes have done this for days without crashing but... It was rough after." Cassie fought to keep her breathing steady. It was awful feeling helpless like this. Conner threw his bottle of water to the ground, "Okay. I'll give it another go." Then he was gone. Again. Cassie glanced to Tim. His usually cool blue eyes were betraying signs of stress as he clicked through various tabs on his laptop. They couldn't activate anything global without alerting the league and putting Bart in danger. Not to mention further stressing him out. -- most speedsters run off their problems when things get to much. where it gets dangerous is when they don't (or can't) stop.

Uh, Who?! by FloatingNebulas - Rated T

Everyone knows the four remaining members of Young Justice: Tim Drake, Bart Allen, Cassandra Sandsmark, and Kon-El. Everyone also knows that the four of them used to be part of a team named Young Justice in their early days, before joining the Teen Titans. However, very few people know what happened on that team. Very few people also know about the missing members of the team. Young Justice was not just those four. Young Justice was populated almost entirely by unknown names in case files and half-forgotten syllables. Or, five times someone learned about the forgotten members of Young Justice and had no idea who they were, and one time they met them.

it’s all fun and games ‘til Santa checks the naughty list by suzukiblu - Rated T

“Because we said we were gonna do it together, Bart,” Cassie says. “Which requires us all being here and contributing. Together. Tim is not here yet, therefore we are not all here and contributing, therefore we are going to wait.” “Tim is an atheist!” Bart says. “A Jewish atheist!” “Christmas decorations don’t, like, stop working if you don’t believe in them, man,” Kon says, then raises an eyebrow at him. “And aren’t you an atheist?” “That’s between me and the Speed Force,” Bart says, making a face at him. “But Tim is. And Cassie knows gods and doesn’t even pray to them, and you just keep anthropomorphizing your broken cloning tube!” “Poor ol’ Nanny McTubers, may she rest in peace,” Kon says wistfully, laying a hand over his heart before shrugging casually. “Or pieces.”

"Don't mess with my friends" by siren_of_the_ocean - Rated T

A phone call can bring many things. Good news, bad news, joy and terror. This particular phone call never should have happened. “Tim. Greta’s missing”

Those still here by Lilac_Demetrius - Rated T

After a week in space, Tim and his team return to earth only to find out that 5 years have passed since they left, and everyone thinks they're dead.

Bat in a Flash by siren_of_the_ocean - Rated T

When Tim is struck by lightning, his whole world changes. Everything moves just slightly slower now. Not because they are slow but because he is fast. Now he has to adapt and live, but with the help of Young Justice and the Flash team, he might actually make it through.

The Case of the Missing Kryptonite by Mouse_in_this_house - Rated G

The Kryptonite ring in the Batcave has gone missing. When such a dangerous weapon is in the wind, the Bats have to collaborate to track it down. Meanwhile, the former Young Justice team obliviously enjoys their piercing party.

Streamer by Day, Vigilante by Night by jupiterliketheplanet - Rated G

Ok, maybe Tim has a problem with working too much. But seriously Dinah, a hobby? or; Four friends accidentally get internet famous in an attempt to get Dinah off their back about having fun outside of work.

Tim Collects Last Names Like Infinity Stones by zetarogue - Rated G

“If we got married, you’d be Tim Allen.” Tim didn’t look up from his computer as he spoke. “Bold of you to assume I wouldn’t just add another hyphen.”

Put a ring on it by Miss_Choco_chips - Rated T

"You’re gonna freak out so badly over this when you actually wake up", she informed Tim’s fluffy hair. Said vigilante only released a cute little snore, face buried on her lap, legs thrown over Kon’s, one hand that had fallen from the couch resting on Bart’s head where he sat on the floor in front of them. "Well, they were going to find out one way or another. And this was probably among the best scenarios." "How? This was probably out of Tim’s ‘worst case’ nightmare list." "I was there and saw their faces. I didn’t even know Batman could express any emotion other than ‘cold’ and ‘overflowing with rage’. That image will bring me joy in future distressing times, I’m sure. My patronus memory, if you will."

[fromgoy2joy]

(Setting the scene- a group of Jewish kids are going across the city on public transport to get milkshakes after dinner at a rabbi’s house)

“Are you sure you have directions, Hao?” I ask through chattered teeth because as long as my shabbos skirt is, it’s not enough to protect me from the surprise cold of March.

“He’s never sure.” Josh snorts, folding his arms tight against each other to look cool. He then yelps, when Hao nearly slaps his arm off its joint.

“Uh huh, uh huh,” Hao nods, fiddling with the transportation app after asserting dominance in the previous moment. “We either switch stops three times or we stay on the one train. The difference is four minutes.”

“Okay never mind,” I quickly interrupt. “I don’t trust you. Let’s just stick on the one train.”

Avigal and I share a look as Josh and Hao argue over the best way as to get to the random podunk place they swear up and down they’d been to years ago. The arrival time flashes up on the glitching screen- it’s due.

“Well it’s going to be here in a minute,” Avigal interrupts the boys, reaching for her public transport card. “We should get on the platform-“

“Wait, wait, wait,” Hao holds up his hands. “We’re forgetting something.” He gestures around us. “Let’s not get hatecrimed tonight, y’all? Come on, i’m expecting some communal effort.”

Simultaneously, we all zip up our jackets all the way to our chins, obscuring our Magen Davids, Chai pendants, hostage awareness dog tags- and in Josh’s case- all three. He grumbles when we tease him he’s an ADL case on legs.

And then we hear the train coming down the tracks, and start sprinting off up the stairs, into the rest of our holy day.

[pyr0x10n]

vaquero kyle 😍 (the reader forced him to dress like that, bro was not having it)

The main 4 are at a qunice (do wtv you want with this bit)

After awhile reader gets horny and stupid and takes Kyle to the bathroom to do 'stuff' :3

bc he looks SOSO good in his outfit

I have a really bad thing for shit like this idk why

Nah because he’s be so done when you ask him to dress like that 💀

————

Mi Vaquero<3

————

Genre: Fluff + Smut

Synopsis: Vaquero Kyle‼️‼️ y horny reader obvi 😝

Kyle Broflovski x f!reader

————

“I cant believe i actually did this..” Kyle sighed, frustrated. “It’s fun! And plus, you get to see part of my culture!” You laughed. “Why did they have to tag along, AND WHY IS KENNY IN A DRESS!?” He pointed at Kenny, who was checking himself out in a dress. “ “Él solo es parte de las damas!” “Huh?” “Nothing.” You smiled innocently. “Damn I look hot.” Kenny grinned.

“Anyways, who’s this quinceañera for anyways?” Kyle asked, as the cumbia started playing. “Oh, just my cousin.” You said, looking for your phone in your purse.

“Oh, okay. Well, what’s going to happen?” Kyle asked. “You’ll see, just, follow my lead. The boys can find their way around.” You giggled, and Kyle started to get a little nervous.

“What if I ruin it all!? What if I accidentally spill something? What if I ruin the- I don’t know!” He was starting to panic, and you brought your lips to his. “You’ll be fine, hun. I promise.” You smiled at him.

“BUT IM JEWISH-!” “KYLE JUST TRUST ME.” “HOW!???” “JUST THIS ONCE BABY!?” “Fine.” “Yay.” “….” “…”

“Prima!” You heard a voice yell. “Ah, there’s the girl.” You smiled at the girl who was now fifteen. Kyle just watched behind as you two talked about things.

“Oh, my mom’s calling me.” She said, and then waved, walking away.

“That’s your cousin?” Kyle asked. “Yep, the one and only.” You sighed.

“Well, c’mon, we gotta go out! The boys already went out, so we should too!” You said and grabbed Kyle’s hand, running out of the dressing room and out into the area.

“Oh shit- (Y/n) calm down!!” He said, slightly panicked. “Shh, c’mon, dance with me, vaquero!” You said, now having both of his hands in yours. He was now calming down, as you two danced to the cumbia romántica.

(Murder me, but I have no idea what else to write, sooo…)

You guys have been here for only a few hours,

Yet you were so unbelievably horny.

Just because of Kyle rocking that outfit. He had you blushing without even knowing.

“Hey Kyle..” you mumbled, tugging on his belt.

“Hm? Yeah, baby? What’s up?”

“Can you bring me to the room really quick.. it’s really hot..” you asked.

“Uh, sure?” He knew what was going on, he’s just teasing.

You grabbed his hand and let him to the gust bedroom, when the door closed, he locked it and you immediately laid your head on his chest, sighing.

“Kyle I need you..”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm..”

Kyle laughed at your neediness, as you started taking his belt off. He pulled you into a kiss, and you felt yourself getting wetter and more pathetic by the second.

You need him.

You pulled away and took his pants down, slowly due to the lightheaded feeling you had. He connected his lips to your neck, kissing the exposed area. You lowly moaned but he covered your mouth.

“You don’t want your family hearing your sounds, right angel?” He asked as you got on top of him and shook your head. “No..” “then shut your pretty mouth, would you baby?” He commanded, and you nodded. You just needed him in you.

You put your panties to the side and aligned yourself with him, and slowly brought yourself down to his dick. He pulled you in a kiss to muffle out your moans.

It took some time, but you finally got used to his size and started riding him.

Man we’re you in for a looooong ride ;)

————

Necesito ayuda 😨

[olderthannetfic]

Goyim goysplaining shit to me is why I don't write Jewish characters anymore. "Well actually that name is this AGAB so the character isn't NB they're *insert AGAB here*" "well actually according to Google you shouldn't have used the word candle you should have said this" "well actually goy is a slur and it's not bad of commenters to use 'Hebrews' to refer to all Jewish people even though I *will* get mad if you call Catholics 'Latins' in response" "well actually it's a kippah not a yarmulke you can't use the word yarmulke it's a kippah" "well actually Jewish people are white so why is this Beta Israeli character not white Jewish = white" "uh excuse me but your Jewish characters didn't exchange Hebrew names that's really unrealistic" "uh excuse me why is your character breaking kosher to stay alive? everything I see on TV says Jews would rather die than break kosher and live - no I don't know or care that pikuach nefesh is a thing I just wanted to correct you on the proper way to write a Jewish character" etc. Whether it's goyim commenting on Undertale fanfics to say all Jewish people would be Red souls (because we don't have individual souls, personalities and colors like the non-Jewish characters, that'd be silly) because we survived the Holocaust or goyim saying Jewish Bruce Wayne makes sense because Jews have all the money, or being confused on how you can headcanon anyone as Jewish who isn't white because Jewish people are white (which is a surprise to my Iranian Jewish self but go off I guess) there is always someone there to tell you that you're not human like other people. These people would never go "oh Latinos all have Red souls and the same personality, definitely" or "Muslim Bruce Wayne makes sense, those people all have oil money" but they'll say antisemitic shit right to your face and then have the gall to be annoyed when you don't like it.

This is why I pulled all my fic without leaving copies up for archives. "B-but I love your fic it's the only multichaptered one for this rarepair!" Well you didn't respect me enough not to say Jews have all the money, so fuck you. "Nooo I loved that fic it had such a good magic system!" Yeah well I didn't love being told my "race" shares a single personality type/soul color so tough shit.

And then afterwards of course they write "Jewish Batfam" fic where there's 1 line in the entire thing where one character mentions Hanukkah once and they pat themselves on the back for being such good, diverse, inclusive writers. They're so woke and accepting and galaxy brained, devoid of prejudice, aren't you going to pat them on the back for clogging up Jewish related tags with fic where skipping one line could erase all presence of Judaism from it? No? Well then why don't you go write your own fic then?!

It's a rhetorical question, but here's the non-rhetorical answer: I don't go write my own fic because I'm tired of having to hear Jewish people talked about the way y'all talk about Tolkien's elves or Undertale's monsters and having to advocate for the idea of treating Jewish people like people is exhausting work.

Literally the only fandom I've ever been in that didn't go "oh well that's just fandom! if you don't like it don't write fics lol" was Star Trek. And even then, you venture outside of AO3 at your own risk.

--

[bluejaysandblackbats]

A Yellow Ribbon

Fandom: DC Comics, Young Justice, Flashfam, Superfam

Summary: Conner's been best friends with Bart ever since they met at the carnival when they were children. The problem is that Bart can't remember meeting Conner that night. But Thad does...

Chapters: 9/?

Characters: Clark Kent, Conner Kent, Lois Lane, Bart Allen, Thaddeus Thawne, Don Allen, Meloni Allen, Jonathan "Pa" Kent, Martha Kent, Max Crandall

Relationships: KonBart, KonThad, Clois, MelonixDon, Ma/Pa Kent

Additional Tags: No Powers AU, Mistaken Identity, Possibly Unrequited Love, Unrequited Crush, Twins, Lies, Stolen Moments, Unconventional Love Triangles, Misunderstandings, Childhood Friends, Complicated Relationships, Family Dynamics, Family Bonding, Best Friends, Secret Crush, Autistic Bart Allen, Autistic Thad Thawne, Thaddeus Thawne Gets a Hug, Conner Kent-centric, Bisexual Conner Kent, Conner Kent Needs a Hug, Third Person POV, Hurt Clark Kent, Boys in Love, Friendship/Love, Farm/Ranch AU, Farmboy Conner Kent, Grandparents and Grandchildren, Unconventional Families, Unconventional Relationship, Romance, Light Angst, Strangers to Lovers, Cyrano, Jewish Superfam

Chapter Nine: Return of Cowboy Conner

The arrival at the Kent farm meant goodbye for Lois and Clark. They took him to the front door with heavy hearts, and Lois took Conner’s hand. “Thank you for giving us a chance,” Lois whispered.

“Wait, Mommy… You aren’t gonna stay a little while?” Conner asked. Clark and Lois went wide-eyed. “Mommy… Daddy, can you stay another day?”

“Of course, Conner. Um—. I’m going to talk to Ma and Pa,” Clark whispered before kissing his son’s forehead. “Ma! Pa!” Clark ran inside with a childlike excitement Conner hadn’t ever seen before. He giggled.

“Mommy, do you think it’d be okay for me to see Banna?” Conner asked.

“Oh, Conner. Before you see Banna, come in and have a slice of pie. Pa and I want to tell you something,” Ma replied from the other room. Lois and Conner entered the house and joined Ma and Clark in the kitchen.

Conner hugged Ma and frowned. “Is something wrong with Banna?” Conner whimpered.

“Nope. Banna’s going to be a mommy. Today, actually. That’s where Pa is right now. He’s with the vet. Banna went into labor thirty minutes ago,” Ma replied.

Conner ran off toward the barn, and Lois moved to stop him, only for Clark to shake his head. “Let him go. He should be there,” Clark smiled.

Conner sprinted across the field to the barn and took his place by Pa’s side. “Hey there, Kiddo. Clark didn’t sit in on his first calf birthin’ until he was twelve. Are you sure you want to be here?” Pa asked.

“Uh-huh,” Conner replied. Pa smiled.

“Can you go out and fetch more warm water in the pail? It’ll help Doc Paula out,” Pa requested.

Conner nodded, taking the bucket toward the house. “Ma! Ma!” Conner shouted. Ma took the pail from Conner and filled it with warm water. “Is the water warm?”

“It sure is, Conner. Hey, I made you, Doc Hale, and Pa some lunch. Can you carry it with the pail? Or do you need some help?” Ma asked. Conner grabbed the pail, weighing it as he considered her question.

“I hafta carry it with both hands,” Conner whispered, “I can come back after I get the bucket to Pa and Doc Paula.”

“No, uh—. I’ll come with you. I’ll carry the bucket, so you can carry lunch to Pa,” Clark volunteered, “I won’t go in with you, though.”

Conner squinted at Clark. “Are you scared?” Conner asked. Clark nodded.

“Calving makes me a bit squeamish,” Clark replied. Conner nodded as Clark took the pail and handed Conner the picnic basket. “Pa seem calm?”

“Mhm. Is it gonna take long?” Conner asked.

“If everything goes well, it should be four hours or less,” Clark replied, “You gonna be okay?”

“Mhm. As long as Banna’s okay,” Conner replied, “Are you mad that I don’t want to go to school in Metropolis anymore?”

“No. I understand. Conner, did you like anything about Metropolis?” Clark questioned. Conner smiled up at Clark, completely unafraid of Clark for the first time.

“You and Mommy… And I liked going to the synagogue with you. And the mole trains,” Conner answered. Clark took Conner’s free hand and chuckled.

“The subway was fun,” Clark whispered as if he were speaking to himself and not Conner. “We’re going to visit all the time. Way more than we did before. Okay?”

“Promise?” Conner asked.

They stopped at the barn, and Clark swallowed hard. “I promise. It won’t be like before. We can video chat every single day after school,” Clark offered. Conner nodded and embraced Clark.

“Gonna hold you to that, Daddy,” Conner grinned as he took the basket to Pa and returned to Clark to retrieve the bucket.

*

Pa woke Conner toward the end of Banna’s labor. “Hey, Kiddo. Wake up, I think it’s time,” Pa whispered. Conner looked up, watching as the doctor pulled the calf from Banna.

“Wanna cut the navel cord, Conner?” Doc Paula asked.

Conner nodded, and Doc Paula told him to wash his hands. She gave him the scissors and guided his hand. “Is it gonna hurt them?” Conner asked.

“It’s a normal part of calving,” Doc Paula replied, “Okay… Cut here, sweetheart.”

Conner obeyed and rejoined Pa. “I did it,” Conner whispered. Pa caught a picture with his camera, proudly smiling at his grandson’s accomplishment.

“You’ll hafta name her,” Pa replied. Conner’s jaw dropped. “Yeah, go on. You earned it.”

“Toffee,” Conner replied.

“That was quick. Toffee it is,” Pa chuckled, “Good job, Conner. Hey, Kiddo? How was Metropolis? Did you like city livin’?”

“Thanks, Pa… Everyone lives so close to each other in Metropolis, and the buildings are so tall. We lived on the seventh floor. Everybody looks small from the seventh floor. Then, my friend lived next door, but he was sick and couldn’t come over to play… Then—. Pa, why are some kids born sick? Daddy says it’s science, but why can’t we fix science?” Conner replied.

“Scientists can only do so much. We’re still figuring out how all of this works. Humans are smart, but nature is so complex, Kiddo. The world is full of things we don’t understand. Why is the sky blue? Why do people hate each other sometimes? Why do we cry sometimes? There’s so much we don’t understand,” Pa explained.

“I wish we understood how to make people feel better,” Conner replied. Pa nodded.

“I know, Conner. Let’s wash up. It’s almost dinnertime—.”

“Can I stay with Banna and Toffee?” Conner interrupted. Pa nodded.

“I’ll have Clark and Lois bring your supper,” Pa whispered, “And hey… I’m glad you’re home. I was short a cowboy this year.”

Pa placed his hat on Conner’s head and left him with the vet and the cows. Clark paced outside the house with his arms crossed and his hands tucked awkwardly in his armpits. “Pa! How’d—?”

“Everything went fine. Conner cut the cord for the doctor, but now he wants to sit with Banna and Toffee for a while. You should check on him, though. He looks like he’s carrying a lot,” Pa replied. Clark frowned and nodded. “How sick is that friend of his?”

“The medication messes with his memory. He’s forgetting names and faces… He couldn’t remember Conner’s name off the top of his head most of the time. Then, he sleeps most of the day until their playdate,” Clark answered, “But the big issue is his immunity problems. That’s why he doesn’t go out.”

“Do you think—? Do you know if Conner would be up for a party? We invited some of his friends to welcome him back next weekend. A few kids from the temple, a couple more kids from his school, and a few of the neighboring farmers’ kids,” Pa whispered. Clark smiled.

“He’ll love that,” Clark replied, “Hey, Pa? I think I need—. We might stick around for a while.”

Pa messed up Clark’s hair. “He’s especially hard to let go of. Isn’t he?” Pa chuckled. Clark nodded and laughed.

[gaykarstaagforever]

This is a list of scripted ABC shows from the last season. I haven't heard of most of them because I'm not 63 so I'm going to guess what they are about from the titles and then check and see how right I was. Or if my idea is better.

1. The Conners was that reboot / sequel of Roseanne. But then Roseanne was insane and racist in real life so they kicked her off of it. I assume it was retooled to now be about the family becoming private eyes and traveling from town to town in a gadget-loaded super RV, solving mysteries.

You should all note before I go on that most of what I know about network television comes from the 70s and 80s. Back when it was also cheap and lame, but at least fun.

2. Abbott Elementary. Probably just Community / The Office, but in an elementary school filled with a diverse cast of quirky characters who only seem to date each-other. I bet they do a lot of jokes about helicopter parents and people getting offended by seemingly innocuous things. There is probably a sassy brown person whose culture is played for light-hearted comic relief.

3. Station 19. Firefighter show, where all the firefighters look like soap opera actors. Most of the show is people having arguments and making out, then like 3 times a season stunt people in face-hiding fire gear fight a big fire inspired by some thing that happened in the news around the time they were filming the show. I bet the tag line is "And you thought the hottest action would be the fires!" Occasionally old actors from 80s movies will cameo as someone's parents. I am falling asleep just typing about it.

4. Grey's Anatomy. Oh my god. In real life these people would have retired from being bad doctors by now. Or be in jail.

5. The Rookie. I looked this one up due to the last post. Nathan Fillion plays a 50 year old rookie LAPD officer. Because they wanted to do a cop show with him but he's too old for that, without the premise. He probably has to learn about diversity and drugs or something. No one ever gets shot and they don't show LAPD white supremacist cop-gangs doing dog fights or anything. Wasted potential.

6. The Goldbergs. I've heard of this. It was some writer's Everybody Hates Chris about his 80s secular Jewish family. Obnoxious old people watched it to be reminded about how they just don't make good rock music like that anymore, man, because they are too old and lazy to go find new music they might like via streaming platforms. It has been cancelled. Good, if only to spare me that recurring conversation with people I don't like.

7. Home Economics. A rich white homemaker lady gets divorced and has to get a job as a home ec teacher at a public junior high to make ends meet? And she slowly learns to laugh and love again, while also coming to realize that poorer people are good for more than just mowing your lawn. There are hijinks about her wearing $600 shoes that get covered in cake batter. She has to rent part of her house out to an Indian immigrant family. Starring Delta Burke from 1995.

8. The Good Doctor. Ha ha ha. That show about an autistic doctor, except Hollywood doesn't know what autism actually is so he's just a deranged lunatic who gets away with shitty behavior because he's good at hearts.

But not in the fun, House MD, way.

9. The Rookie: Feds. This got cancelled so that means it was bad, even by low network TV cop show standards. I don't even know how to do that. Uh...some 50 year old TV actress I probably wouldn't recognize quits being a crime professor to become an FBI agent, after her son FBI agent goes missing under mysterious circumstances? And it ended in a cliffhanger when she got attacked by a polar bear in the middle of the jungle.

10. Not Dead Yet. My Name is Earl, but if Earl was a nice zombie. He has a best friend guardian angel played by Jaleel White.

...This actually just sounds like Highway to Heaven, if Michael Landon had been a zombie. And instead of brains he eats Jell-O, and he can take his limbs off and send them into air ducts and up drain pipes to help people, like trained rats.

...I'd watch a couple episodes of that, I guess.

11. Will Trent. Oh give me a break.

Okay. There is guy named Will Trent, who is on the run from the...CIA, because he was with them but then someone framed him for killing the Speaker of the House with a poisoned lapel pin. He now travels from town to town, helping average people and their sexy sisters out of jams, while also trying to figure out who framed him and what their master plan is, to clear his name.

The last season ended with it looking like the real villain is the First Lady, who belongs to some ill-defined anti-America cult.

It's probably based on a book series from the early 2000s that only the loudest uncles read.

12. Big Sky. Some cowboy thing, probably. Where all the cowboys are hunky stoic white men who are millionaire ranch owners. But you are still supposed to sympathize with all their "we gotta keep a-hold of this land at any cost" violent toxic male shit, because you are a postmenopausal my mother and want to have sex with these men.

It's one of those shows that just "accidentally" has zero POC cast members, who aren't one-shot drug-runners or coyotes or thugs hired by rival ranch owners.

One-shot because that is how all of their characters are killed.

It probably got cancelled when some writer got smart and tried to do a thinly-veiled anti-Trump allegory and all the Evangelicals turned on it. Tucker Carlson probably got mad about it for 3 minutes, before he interviewed some Russian politician about how the Ukrainians hate Jesus.

13. The Company You Keep. Black women try starting and running a bakery. It quickly devolved into a romantic melodrama. Black audiences never cared and white audiences wanted more sexy rich cowboys.

I don't know. It's ABC. Every seasonal lineup has at least a couple token shows starring POCs that get immediately cancelled after one season, because they aren't serious attempts at anything outside of the politics and so never connect with an audience.

Also all of them are still written by white men, so what chance could any of them have, really?

14. Alaska Daily. Northern Exposure, but the protagonist edits a news blog when not busy solving quirky small-town mysteries. The Janitor from Scrubs might be in it.

...Well. WAS in it.

This Twin Peaks thing is hard to pull off in a compelling way unless you are willing to go kookoo-bananas with it.

15. A Million Little Things. This one "ended," which means the cast wanted too much money after so many seasons, so "the producers had always planned from the beginning to wrap things up after 5 seasons."

It was probably one of those shows that just follows a "typical American family," which happens to have soap opera problems every week based on things the writers heard CNN say people in the Midwest are mad enough over to vote for Trump again.

It probably had a regular cast of like 16 people, and was on the giant TV in the showroom of every US car dealership at least once. Until someone changed it to that show which is just Kitchen Nightmares, but Gordon Ramsey has been replaced by a balding round man who lacks his charm and good heart and is just an asshole to struggling restaurateurs.

You know the one.

Or, at least, your parents do.

Update: The Conclusion

[randomnameless]

I've been meaning to ask this for a while but tbh I was hoping it'd stop before it became a regular thing, but that didn't happen... so anyway, I'll just cut to the chase, why do you keep calling the nabateans lizard people? This just feels wildly inappropriate tbh, to give a *fictional* group a label that carries such heavily antisemetic qualities. You are full on calling a group of shapeshifting dragons, one of which is head of a continental institution of power, and who hide their ability to shapeshift, an antisemetic label, and you are missing how this is actually worse. It has been exactly 0 weeks since I've seen people calling the nabateans 'lizard people' and then turning around saying they're jewish coded, and then calling people who don't like rhea antisemetic. Bc theyre 'lizard people' and therefore 'jewish'. This is literally so fucking offensive. Can you please at least come up with a different thing to call them? Bc this shit is just blasted in the main tags literally every single day and tbf it's extremely draining to see people constantly throwing that term around like it's nothing

I was debating whether I should reply to this given how I received a similar ask a little over a month ago from a notorious troll, but for the 1% of chance that this ask isn't another troll, and because I feel like it's important to put words on things, I'll give a complete answer -

under the cut, because it's long!

First of all, unless I missed a post after checking on the archive, I do not think I ever used the words "lizard people", except when it is to talk about the varying degrees of "weird" and "yikes" some takes in the fandom smell like.

If I did, however, I apologise, it was obviously not meant to make an antisemitic statement or whatever it is you think it was, as you might now I am not an english native speaker, so some idioms or association of words don't immediately lit a red light, I made some blunders some time ago and immediately corrected it when someone pointed it out (like, the word "bamboula" refers to an african dance, but the second you say "bamboula" in France you're immediately suspected of being racist, because it was used as a common slur in the 1910s and is still used in some, uh, far right conventions, I guess). If you have a post in mind, then feel free to share, and I'll edit it accordingly!

The tag I use for general Nabatean content is "lizard family time?".

Now, as you can guess after, I supposed, reading this blog and especially, content tagged with this, well, tag, I use it to tag cute/warm/random/fluffy artwork, headcanons, shitposts and whatnot. As the name suggest, I use it to tag content I like about Nabateans acting like a family.

As for, I supposed, the "lizard" mention that might make people confused, Nabateans are a race of fictional people in a fictional game who can turn in giant beasts, all beasts we have seen so far have reptile-like qualities or are, generally speaking, from the reptile family (a dragon, a turtle, and a... bird/griffin thing). Now, calling them "reptilians" felt a bit too close to a slur, but there were harmless jokes around about Rhea, because of her draconic form, having cold blood thus liking to sit on warm rocks, and I found it cute, thus I adopted the "lizard fam" denomination, and ended up with the "lizard family time?" tag.

Short story, long story : this tag is obvioulsy not meant to convey anti-semitic theories and thoughts about real people in real life, but to tag content about a fantasy race of shapeshifters who sometimes shift in giant reptiles who act as a familial cell.

Which brings me to my second point -

(and one I already developed a bit in the previous post)

Fire Emblem is a series who always had fantasy "humans" interact with another fantasy race of people being able to turn in other creatures, mostly dragons.

Fire Emblem Fodlan's take on those creatures is :

People who were genocided,

People racially profiled by their enemies who had a hand in said genocide,

People who hide those traits,

People who are religious,

People who are depicted by someone as ruling over the world in secret,

People who are depicted by the same someone as "hoarding money" and deceiving everyone,

People whose blood, according to the same someone's rhetoric, corrupts humanity and is the reason why the World sucks,

People who are constantly othered by their enemies, who cannot see them as being able to live with them, nor having "human feelings" because of their race,

+

The someone mentionned above comes from a country that names its people with names and surnames (and evern particles!) kind of similar to a real world country.

I do not think the developers of this game wanted to make a "Godwin Points : the Game" version of Fire Emblem, but there are a lot of clues someone who knows even very little of the recent World's History might catch and compare to, well, some events that happened.

As such, I do not think me calling Nabateans "lizard family" is an antisemitic label or calling them "lizards" is the only reason why, to some people, Nabateans are "jewish coded", to borrow your own words. I just made a bullet list of other "reasons" who might lead some people to believe this.

Anyways, I always advocate against insulting people or giving them labels based on their opinions about a bunch of pixels from a fantasy universe, so you can dislike Nabateans and not be called anti-semitic, just like you can not vote for a female character in a harmless poll and not be called a misogynist, just like you can like a bisexual character and not be called a homophobe, etc, etc.

Racism, homophobia, sexism, ableism, antisemitism... are real-life legal concepts and notions that exist and encompass real situations, with real people, and real consequences.

Suggesting I might be anti-semitic because I quote Zephia call the Divine Dragon Alear a "lizard" is ridiculous, when we all know, even you, who sent this ask, what anti-semitism is and what it entails in real life for real people who are subjected to it.

Using real life notions and legal concepts to defend a bunch of pixels is puerile and ultimately says more about the one who is using those notions, thinking they can be easily distorted and used to talk about fantasy characters from a video game made by devs who forgot to hire a continuity guy, than whatever point he wanted to make.

As such, I do not think calling fantasy men and women who can transform in dragons/turtles/griffins-bird things "lizards" is offensive, but bringing up real-life discriminations and situations people are experiencing as we speak, to win an internet argument over fictional characters, is, imho, offensive.

If you do not agree, then you are free to block this blog and the contents I post (curate your Tumblr experience, the block button is here for that!), you can even report it to whoever is in charge of moderating this platform ; I do not think I breached any ToS and if I did, I would much prefer the Tumblr staff to tell me how and why, than someone who sends a message via anon asks who is, from what I can deduce from your ask, annoyed at seeing opinions - as smelly as they can be - about a video game.

[juniperkinglet]

so @cozy-fish-crow tagged me in this here tag game, ty milo!! i'm leaving this as an open tag for anyone who wants to do it cuz i'm super curious to see everyone's answers!

🫀 Currently reading: too many books lmao. the main ones are:

Lost Souls by Poppy Z. Brite (queer vampire horror. emotionally very hard to read! but i love it so far)

Black Unicorn by Tanith Lee (whimsical high fantasy, cute and fun and makes me laugh)

Hunger Pangs by Joy Demorra (supernatural polyam romance! i'm not much of a romance reader, but it's so well written and i adore the characters deeply)

Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik (slavic jewish dark fantasy!! everything i've ever wanted in jewish characters and female characters. i'm in love.)

🫀 Favorite color: jewel tones, specifically blue & purple. also maroon.

🫀 Last audio file I listened to: Not In Love by Crystal Castles ft. Robert Smith <3 a classic

🫀 Last movie I watched: Crimson Peak! it was my second viewing. not exactly as suspenseful as my first time, before i knew all the twists, but still just as good!

🫀 Sweet, spicy, or savoury: huuuuge sweet tooth

🫀 Currently working on: a few original works, namely two short stories that i may try to get published! also writing two novels, and plotting/worldbuilding three others.

fic-wise, i've picked my kevin sickfic oneshot back up and should get that posted next week :) i've also done a rough outline of a ravens!neil/kevin/riko oneshot that i'm excited about :} and uh, last night i wrote *checks notes* 1,349 words just,, brainstorming a seth/kevin longfic on a whim. just... thinkin about it. maybe

if you think this sounds like too many projects at once then you're absolutely right lmao, but also this is the only way i can stay consistently writing!! if i try to stick to only one thing at a time, i get bored or writers blocked easily and just stop writing for long stretches. gotta stay in the habit by following the whims of hyperfixation!

[adrisventari]

pin pin pin

hi hello, I am adris. I have a tumblr bc cringe is dead, this is where the fixations go.

I refuse to have a sideblog, all the shit happens here, as organized as I can make it.

a few fun facts

queer, they/she, demisexual

22

jewish american, white af, 🍉

assholes get blocked, I don't have time for u sweaty

hobbyist writer/illustrator, professional atelier/stitcher/designer/costumer

also professional yapper, questionable formatter, and lurker

welcome to the scream zone, tag guide below

~tag guide~

misc

#tunes (related to music)

#writing (related to writing)

#art (related to art)

#chatty (random life things and responses)

#points (related to causes/movements/information I care about, you should look at it)

#giggledick (it made me laugh)

#mwah mwah (I kiss it)

#the library (books n literature n all that jazz)

#the atelier (costumes/fashion)

#the wings (theatre)

#inked (tattoo and piercing stuff)

major characters

#ariaami veilkeeper [aria-me] (charr, mesmer, the commander, aurene's champion, wayfinder, disaster)

#enansi [anan-see] (sylvari, engineer, black market participant, pathetic little man, covered in blood and slutty, beloved brother to Yen)

#adalasa elise [ada-lass-uh] (human, elementalist, former pact lieutenant, elonian ambassador, super graphic ultra modern girl)

#jodnil stormbringer [jode-neil] (norn, ranger/revenant, former pact lieutenant, aurene's first champion, comfy cozy gay creature dad)

#gehix [gee-hix] (asura, guardian, former pact lieutenant, medic, dad, insufferable caretaker friend, will not be billed for therapy)

#validine [val-ih-dine] (sylvari, thief, former pact lieutenant, almost mordrem, died??? 1328, mistwalker, fractal dweller)

#yenevyn [yen-eh-vyn] (sylvari, warrior, the first soundless, jack of many trades, beloved sister to Enansi)

#emyij [em-yih-j] (asura, necromancer, former Whispers Inquest plant, blind, maginamics expert)

#kyrie [ky-ree] (original DnD character, TAV, half-elf kinda sorta if you squint, druid, bookish, the least socially acclimated girlie you ever did see)

#icarion [i-carian] (the dark urge, that's a species, monk, just the worst, edgy mf)

[queermarzipan]

[Image ID:

The first image is a screenshot of a quote tweet. It responds to a tweet reading "Why is this generation so comfortable disrespecting God? Aren't you scared ???". The response reads, "So you agree? Christianity is reinforced through fear instead of faith?" and is accompanied by with the meme screencap of Regina George leaning over the table with a predatory smile.

The second image is a screenshot of tumblr tags. They read:

#i was raised catholic but am not anymore #and when i asked one if my baptist friends in college why i should fear god #she told me that it was how you love #and she didnt see anytging wring with that #she said you fear your parents right? #andime my parents arent perfect and weve had our share of issues but ive never feared them #and she thought I WAS the crazy one for thinking that i shouldnt be afraid of the entity that supposedly created us #so many christians especially the very right wing ones tie fear with love #thats why you see them in unhappy and unbalanced marriages too #because the woman has toove the man but love here is synonymous with fear #cause to them the man is higher up than the woman #so when you take that away as with lil nas x did in his new mv #they dont know what to do and cant keep you in line because those tactics no longer work #you realize that love is NOT fear and lil nas x took his power back and made love to be joyous and sexy #i had a thought process but im running out of time before work so please excuse my rambling

/End ID]

@evilkitten3 i NEED to preserve your tags:

#i'm jewish and was raised in a secular household and didn't have much religious thoughts at all until adulthood #but like. my belief is this: if there is a g-d - no clue if there is; probably we aren't supposed to know - i don't need to fear them #how g-d loves me is up to g-d. but i don't believe that love is something i should be afraid of or try to control #any deity existing on the scale typically presented in monotheistic religions would realistically be borderline incomprehensible to humans #little kids can barely understand how five minutes isn't a long time to adults. how am i meant to understand eternity? #there's no way to find out anything for sure until you die and there's no guarantee you'll find out anything even after that #so i don't think it's important to try and please g-d or even to try and understand what g-d is and what that means #i think what really matters is doing what you believe is right and making the most out of the time you're given #anyway my point is that i've never understood when xtians say they fear the deity they worship #why? why do you need to be afraid of him? if you believe he loves you why do you also believe it when people say he wants to hurt you? #why would you WANT to believe that?

sooo uh. yeah this is extremely. this is very real. i still sing at my local church bc it's a good time even though i lost my faith and. the phrase "fear the lord" comes up in the more traditional hymns a LOT. and it's always a positive. it is literally a synonym for "love" or "know" or "embrace".

i remember being taken aback as a young catholic and asking my mom what word was SUPPOSED to be there bc they clearly made a mistake (bc why would you fear the lord?? if the lord is good??) and the response was half "oh fear meant something different back then" and half "being afraid of him is natural when you believe in him because he is so powerful".

like. i grimaced all the way through that psalm. i still sing it sometimes. but yea the conflation of fear and love in christianity is VERY real and VERY present and literally baked into the scripture. i Do Not understand it

Christians hate when a gay man goes “fuck it, I’ll gladly go to Hell if you want me to so bad” because it takes the edge away from their tools of fear. If they can’t scare you with threats of eternal damnation then one of their main weapons is taken away.

[trauma-express]

Why does this song make me think of pre Book 3 Grace and Simon dsfgsfgfsgd

[p-taryn-dactyl]

Kate Bishop x Reader! Maximoff. Reader was an experiment with Wanda and Pietro and she has the power to manipulate elements, but reader didn't escape with them when the Avengers attack a Hydra base they discover you're alive.

a/n: hi! I’m sorry this is so late but i tried my best! Thanks for the request! warning(s): hydra; timeline issues; i don’t really know how good i can write the maximoff siblings so I apologize if anyone is ooc; use of google translate, scandalous i know word count: 1.3k tag list: @coolbeans32 pairing(s): Kate bishop x fem!Maximoff!reader; wanda x sister!reader; pietro x sister!reader (even though he’s, uh, ded) ( A/N: just so everyone knows i write, or at least do my best, to represent Wanda and Pietro as Romani Jewish as that is their ethnicity in the comics, so for this prompt, I’m sorry, but i made it to where Y/N was taken by hydra bc of her power, still keeping the discovery of her being alive though. Idk how it works with age of ultron but in this AU Wanda and Pietro never joined hydra. I’m sorry if this is disappointing to anyone but this is important to me.)

Coming Home

Nothing made sense anymore. Not after the long nights spent in a cage, only ever leaving so the scientists could run tests. You didn’t know how long it had been. Day, months, years, you had no clue. Time faded into irrelevance with each passing second.

You sat in the corner of your cell, your hand pressed flat against the metal floor, willing it to bend. As per usual, you were expecting nothing to happen. But today, the walls shook. You shot upward, standing on your feet in an instant. After a few seconds, you realized you weren't the cause of the shaking. Someone was attacking the base.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

With every blast of power she sent at the walls, Wanda couldn't shake the feeling gripping at her gut. Like something was going to happen, something important. She landed on the ground, her mind searching out, reaching for someone she knew couldn't possibly be there. The sound of repulsor blasts startled her out of concentration.

"Hey Red you good?" Tony asked, stepping over the fallen Hydra agent he had blasted. Wanda nodded, not convincingly.

"There's a heat signature a few halls down. I sent the small hawk to go check it out but, I thought you should know."

Wanda scrunched her eyebrows, confused. Without elaboration, Tony flew off into the air to fight the war drones that were causing havoc on the other side of the base. Wanda shook her head at Iron Man’s antics but made her way to the location Tony had pinged her a second after he left. 

—————————————————————————————————

Your prison walls were crumbling as you punched at the force field keeping you caged in. The down side of your powers. You screamed in frustration and fear as other tremor went through the hall, threatening the foundations. Taking a step back, you ran your fingers through your tangled hair, tears forming in your eyes. But before they could fall, a voice spoke out.

“Hey, do you need help? Wait, that was dumb, sorry, lemme just-”

You turned towards the voice, where a girl about your age stood, a purple archers suit standing out against the grey walls of your prison. She cocked an arrow and fear shot through your spine. Was she about to shoot you? Is this how you die? The archer must’ve seen the conflict in your eyes because she was quick to explain.

“Oh no, no, no! Um, this arrow has a negative electric charge which should cancel out the positive charges running through the field.”

She continued after you stared at her, confused.

“It’s going to take the field down. I’m here to help!” She straightened her back at the last part, attempting to make herself look heroic. She took a step forward, into a stream of light, and you could properly see her. Your eyes widened when you saw the concentration on her face, your heart skipping a beat. Internally, you scolded yourself.

Y/N, you will not develop a crush on the first girl you see!

After the archer shot her arrow, eliminating your containment, she did a little victory dance and you found the warning you gave yourself fading away.

Hesitantly, you stepped out of your cell, taking a deep breath once you felt the call of the earth and the wind. Her arrow must’ve knocked out the power dampeners around your cell. She held out a hand.

“I’m Kate Bishop,” she smiled at you and you felt warmth gather on your cheeks. You took a step forward but stumbled over debris, causing her to catch you.

“Y/N,” you said, stuttering out your name, “Y/N Maximoff.”

Kate’s eyebrows rose in recognition, a blush on her cheeks as well. A few moments passed, silence stretching between you. After the base shook again, Kate snapped out of it, wrapping an arm around your waist, pulling you closer to her. Now you were very flustered.

You watched as she shot an arrow above you, into a hole in the ceiling.

“The exits on this floor caved in, this is the only way out.” With that, you felt yourself lifting in the air. Yelping, you wrapped your arms around Kates neck, the young archers eyes widening as a blush erupted on her cheeks.

Once you were on the next level, you realized how close you were to Kate, giggling awkwardly as you scooted away from her. You were about to thank the archer when a voice spoke out.

“Y/N?” The voice was shaky with fear but you would recognize it anywhere. Spinning around, you were met with the sight of your sister, hovering, her dark brown hair forming a halo around her. You felt her magic feel around your mind, not intrusive, but checking to see if this wasn’t a trick. With a cry, she lowered to the ground and ran to you, wrapping her arms around you. You returned the hug, tears streaming down your face.

“oh moja sestro,” Wanda cried over and over, leaning back to look at you. Her eyes hardened once she saw your state, bruises covering your body.

“I’m going to kill them.” She growled out, not noticing Kate awkwardly standing behind you, taking great interest in the floor. You shook your head, something dark forming in your mind.

“Don’t take that honor from me.”

Wanda chuckled a bit before hesitantly letting you go, noticing Kate.

Kate waved before heading off to where the rest of the team was. Wanda raised an eyebrow before turning towards you, her eyes widening playfully when she saw you watching Kate leave, a blush staining your cheeks. She bumped your shoulder with hers, making you glare at her.

“ućuti.” You mumbled, walking away as Wanda laughed.

Once you were outside the base, you saw Kate and the Avengers all lined up, waiting for you. Wanda walked out behind you.

“Well then, let’s send these fascists to hell.” Tony Stark said, raising his arm, where a missile would fly out to destroy the place you were imprisoned in for years. While you were still getting over the fact the Iron Man was talking to you and the fact you were standing with the Avengers, you processed what he said.

“Wait!” You called out, making the genius pause, opening his faceplate.

“Do you not want me to? ‘Cause I won’t. Your sister scares me.” He muttered the last part, making you laugh a little. You shook your head.

“I didn’t say that.”

Captain America sent you a confused look, practically scratching his head.

You faced the base, closing your eyes in concentration. With a roar, the earth below you came alive, turning rocks into mud with the amount of force you were sending out. In a matter of seconds, the base was completely destroyed. You sent a gust of wind to keep the dust and debris from getting in your eyes. Finally, you called on water from the ground to rise. Soon, where the Hydra base once stood, was a glistening clear lake, it’s water reflecting the sun peacefully.

“Okay, that was both terrifying and awesome at the same time. I’mma make you a suit.” Tony seemed to talk to himself before speaking to the group.

“Alright, back to the ship.”

As you walked with the group, Kate totally subtle, migrated over to you.

“So…elemental control huh?”

You laughed at her awkwardness, playfully bumping her shoulder. You nodded.

“So…archery huh?”

Kate laughed at your response, brushing hair behind her ear. You both talked and laughed on the way back to the jet, your mutual crushes growing.

Wanda trailed behind you, along with Natasha. The two shared a look before smiling.

She was worried about you, of course she was, you were captured, probably tortured for years, but looking at the scene in front of her, watching you and Kate flirt, she knew you would be okay.

a/n: thank you for reading! I’m sorry if this is a let down but i am up to a second part of this if anyone is interested!! (I probably will write one bc i want to dive into the sisterly dynamic between Wanda and Y/N and the romantic relationship between Y/N and Kate) have a great day/night!!

[bookishofalder]

Pretty Girl - Blurb 3

Summary: In which Flip takes care of Pretty Girl during her period.

Warnings: Fluff, just tooth rotting fluff. WC-1,318

A/N: I do know that Flip is Jewish, but I really do not know enough about Hanukkah and in the movie he says he doesn’t practice, so I just mention that he didn’t really ‘celebrate Christmas’ growing up, for the readers to interpret their own way! :)  

Exhaustion coursed through every inch of Flip’s body, making his movements slow and heavy after his long day. As he parked in (Y/N)’s driveway, he felt immensely grateful that the snow had not continued falling that afternoon; he just didn’t have it in him to shovel her driveway. An overwhelming sense of happiness overrode his tired thoughts when he stepped through the front door, the familiar scent of her home mixed with dinner greeting him warmly.

It was Christmas time, and (Y/N) had gone all out in the last few weeks with her decorating, her home filled with tasteful garlands, colourful lights, and cute decorations of Santa Clause and snowmen. She had the fire going tonight, and Flip made a mental note to chop more wood the next morning-Christmas eve. It was their first Christmas together, and Flip had packed to stay over the week, not intending on going home until the holidays ended. Every minute he wasn’t working, he was going to spend here with his girl.

Aside from a dinner scheduled with (Y/N)‘s sister and her husband on Christmas Day, there were no other big plans for the holidays. Flip would call his family Christmas morning, and he intended on bringing (Y/N) out to visit them all in a few weeks when he could take some vacation.

He usually volunteered to work extra shifts during the holidays so that detectives with young families could spend the holidays at home. He’d already committed to this before he and (Y/N) had begun dating weeks before, but she had been supportive of him keeping the shifts. They had plenty of time to spend together, and with Flip staying the week at her place, it made it all the easier. Flip felt this was promising to be one of the best Christmas’s he’d ever had, not that he and his family had really celebrated growing up.  

After removing his extra layers, Flip sauntered into the kitchen, his tired eyes searching for the one person who could cheer him up. And there she was, her back to Flip as she washes her hands at the sink, dinner set on the table. It smelled delicious, and he instantly felt his heart swell-how lucky he felt at that moment. “Pretty girl,” He murmured, and she spun around, surprised, before launching herself into Flip’s arms. He scooped her up, chuckling warmly at the way she always greeted him like they hadn’t seen one another in weeks.

“Flip!” She giggled, peppering his face with kisses, her arms around his neck. Flip used his nose to encourage her lips to his and immediately deepened the kiss, licking into her hot mouth the moment her lips parted for him. With a moan of appreciation, he slowly set her down on the ground, breaking apart after a while. Both red-faced and slightly out of breath, they grinned at one another.

Lovesick idiots, he thought happily.

“Missed you, darling.” He said, tucking her hair behind her ears before glancing to the table, his stomach grumbling at the sight of dinner laid out.

“Missed you too, detective. Let’s tuck in.” (Y/N) replied, motioning toward the table with a smile. They discussed their minimal plans for the next couple of days that Flip had off. (Y/N) had the week off, as did most of the office workers during this time of year. Only a few detectives and officers remained working, in a rotation of double shifts. Which was why Flip was so damn tired tonight and happy to have a relaxing couple of days off with her.

Sensing his exhaustion, (Y/N) began to clear the table, despite it usually being his preferred task when she cooked. He was going to let it slide, grateful for a few minutes to sip his beer and digest a bit before taking a bath, but it was then that he noticed that she seemed a little off. As she moved around the kitchen, Flip could see she was ever so slightly hunched, bending at the middle. It was harder to tell, as she was wearing baggy sweatpants and one of Flip’s sweaters, which dwarfed her entirely. But as he watched her out of the corner of his eye, he saw her wince several times, her face contorted with discomfort.

“Uh, darling, are you alright?”

Her eyes snapped to meet his curious gaze, “Oh! Yes,” She waved him off casually, “Just fine.”

He didn’t believe her in the slightest, but he did not remark, instead, he asked, “Did you want to join me in the bath?” With a suggestive wiggle of his brows. Though she giggled, she shook her head, her expression almost guilty as she answered.

“I already had a shower, just before you got in,” She moved slowly across the kitchen, leaning almost awkwardly against the counter, “I think I’ll just head to bed, read a bit.”

Flip stared at her for a minute, taking in her uncomfortable posture, the flush in her cheeks. He frowned, entirely at a loss. “What’s going on?” Finished his beer, he set it on the table and got to his feet. He approached (Y/N), standing in front of her and placing his hands on the counter, on either side of her small frame.

(Y/N) sighed, “Nothing, just feeling off.” She really was the worst liar, Flip almost wanted to laugh. But he was too concerned at the moment.

He placed one hand on her forehead, which felt normal. “You’re not sick...” He trailed the hand down her face, brushing gently across her jaw. (Y/N) Shook her head, her eyes casting about the kitchen.

As he watched her, he realized she looked embarrassed.

With a mumble, (Y/N) stared at Flip’s chest as she spoke in a rush, “Just, cramps. Sorry, I know men don’t like to hear about-“

“Going to stop you right there, pretty girl.” Flip interjected, bringing both hands to cup her face gently, understanding easing his concern. “There is absolutely no reason why you should be embarrassed about that, nor any reason why I wouldn’t want you to tell me.” He leaned in and gave her a chaste peck, then surprised her when he bent and picked her up, bridal style.

“Flip!” She giggled in delight, “What are you doing?”

He moved down the hall to her bedroom, grinning. “My girl needs me to take care of her, so that’s what I’m going to do.” He replied, placing her on the bed carefully before shucking the covers back and settling them around her. With a small pout, she made to get back up, but Flip pushed her back down before climbing over top of her, caging her body in.

Still laughing, (Y/N) reached up and gripped his shoulders, “And what does that involve, detective?”

Flip dropped his head and pressed his lips to hers, capturing her in a passionate kiss, one hand propping him up and the other stroking along her jaw before settling into her hair. “Well, firstly,” He began after pulling away, his face hovering above hers, “I’m going to run to Al’s and grab you some chocolate. Then I’m going to give you a massage, and keep you warm all night-how does that all sound?” His voice was soft, and he dropped his head every so often to ply her with more gentle kisses.

“Sounds kind of perfect, actually.” (Y/N)’s eyes were wide and glistening, a mixture of emotions crossing her face. Flip grinned, then gave her one last kiss before standing, happy to see her smiling up at him.

“I’ll always take care of you, pretty girl.” Flip stroked her hair back affectionately as he stood next to the bed, and the dazzling grin she gave him then was all the reward he needed. With a final farewell, he hurried out to pick up supplies, excited to return and show her just how much he loved her, his former exhaustion long forgotten.

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