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smacmcdnld · 1 year ago

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every tmbg album in a nutshell

idc if i skipped albums it's my post my choice

THE PINK ALBUM 1: paranoia??????? 2: puppet heads 3: writer's block 4: i hate my life 5: oh no home invasion 6: why did my gf leave me :( 7: i'm a dad 8: kids with rabies are weird 9: the beatles suck ass ngl 10: FGEBUHIWJOKPOFJEH(W*)POKD 11: aNgeLS aRe rEaL 12: MY DOG FUCKING DIED 13: okay what the fuck 14: schizophrenia 15: disfigurement is cool 16: i don't wanna fucking die 17: stereotyping is real guys 18: huh 19: idk what this song is about but it's silly

LINCOLN 1: long distance relationship 2: MOOFBEHUJWIRU#*u9IKM 3: don't do drugs 4: male pattern baldness 5: parodies are fun 6: childhood nightmares amiright? 7: is this a metaphor for being a piece of shit 8: don't be sad bro 9: goddamn i sure love war 10: HAHA PUNS 11: abusive relationships frfr 12: fuck santa claus 13: fuck the haters 14: DIVORCE :D 15: whaaaaaat theeeeee fuuuuck 16: handstands are cool ig 17: i am going to kms 18: manipulating people to get what you want is awesome

FLOOD 1: self-advertising 2: nightlights are epic 3: COWBOY DIVORCE 4: history is cool 5: reincarnation 6: DON'T BE RACIST I AM A BUILDING 7: this can be a metaphor for anything 8: it's not the 1960's dude 9: cool rocks 10: stop moving chairs KYLE it's not cool 11: old people 12: this one's for all those lower-class workers 13: birds are so epic 14: more like taking a shit in the park 15: who the fuck is this guy 16: cave people 17: abusive relationships AGAIN 18: self-advertising AGAIN 19: the goddamn berlin wall

APOLLO 18 1: death lol 2: palindromes are so epic 3: enlarged to show texture 4: doppelgangers bro :( 5: biology class 6: is this about drugs 7: everyone skips this song 8: guitars are epic 9: pavlov's dog 10: why do they love singing about hateful relationships 11: why is this intro so fucking long 12: is this about jesus 13: wooooaaaaahh space 14: don't be shy bro 15: DEATH!!!!! 16: magicians 17: my adhd brain 18: oh finally an instrumental

JOHN HENRY 1: dreaming about death XD LOL 2: snails are amazing 3: getting stoned is cool 4: COWBOY DIVORCE AGAIN?? 5: LEAN 6: this song was made for neurodivergents (in a good way) 7: french is cool 8: alice cooper is so fucking cool 9: does anyone even like this song 10: why does this song even exist bro 11: jail and greek philosophers 12: religious cults 13: this is apollo 18 all over again 14: it's giving tomorrow never knows by the beatles 15: SPOILER ALERT: james ensor 16: "it's too hot" "it's too cold" OH MY GOD AN EXPLOSION 17: stalker 😒 18: roblox jailbreak 19: what 20: woah this is darker than i thought it would be

FACTORY SHOWROOM 1: whore slut bitch cunt 🥰🥰🥰 2: drugs? AGAIN???? 3: transgender 4: i see dead people 5: song of the summer 6: the original song was better 7: dysfunctional family 8: new wave battle 9: hypnotist of ladies's evil cousin 10: presidents are cool 11: ya like jazz 😏 12: I HEAR YOU 13: this is like take me to church by hozier but cooler

LONG TALL WEEKEND 1: oh my god we get another instrumental 2: mink car foreshadowing 3: lesley gore is an icon 4: rats are awesome 5: oh no we lost our token 6: mink car foreshadowing again 7: women are epic 8: this is such a vibe 9: evil 10: violence and killing and murder and crimes :3 11: nuh uh 12: oh shit we got lost oh fuck 13: shhhh don't cry 14: backwards shit 15: thomas edison is a bitch

MINK CAR 1: i love your hair 2: i don't need haters 3: overstimulation 4: goofy ahh 5: this is so corny-2000's-boy-band-love-song-core 6: i am a vampire be afraid 7: aw man you're just a sombrero 8: groovy 9: i am miserable 10: alcoholism 11: it's like that one meme 12: lmao you're so fucking old (psst you're gonna die soon) 13: omg i got run over by a fucking bedazzled car 14: evil skrunkly 15: stop fucking lying 16: who even- 17: james bond inspector gadget idk

THE SPINE 1: homestar runner 2: why is kermit here 3: working in an office is cool 4: holy shit this is so good 5: tomfoolery 6: beach boys reference 7: i hate bastards 8: later on.... 9: abusive relationships back at it again 10: caffeine got me like 11: CUNTY 12: french AGAIN?? 13: HOORAY 14: broke in two like a glowstick 15: writer's block makes a comeback 16: sobbing rn

THE ELSE 1: sarcasm at it's finest 2: YOU DON'T NEED THAT BASTARD IN YOUR LIFE GIRL 3: turn that frown upside down 4: someone call an exorcist 5: coraline moment 6: AHOY THERE MATEYS 7: bruh it's so dark. i guess i'm WITH THE DARK HAHAHA 8: omg clone high reference?? 9: woah that's fucked up 10: damn it my hope just withered 11: bro i need my dictionary 12: amnesia moment 13: it is not the late fourth millennium BC

JOIN US 1: fuck everyone and everything 2: hey girl are you a girl because you look like a girl 3: you're crazy😂😂😂 4: cryptids are epic 5: shut the fuck up you bitch 6: rapunzel 7: woohoo 8: i am a gifted burnout kid 9: can you die rn lmao 10: okay so what 11: ily judy 12: in my hopeless romantic era 13: this is such a vibe 14: don't text and drive 15: dogs 16: what year is it 17: what 18: "i don't like this song" AND IT DOESN'T LIKE YOU EITHER

NANOBOTS 1: go to the fucking hospital 2: what the fuck does this even mean 3: huh 4: this is so fire 5: scooby-doo ahh song 6: my mom died 7: fuck elon musk 8: i must eep 9: FIRE SONG ABOUT REBELLION 10: i am going to go cry 11: fuck the past this is the present 12: shhh these are 9 secret steps 13: bees love your mind 14: hmmmmm 15: nouns are epic 16: ROBIN GOLDWASSER 17: insects and hospitals 18: predicament 19: ooh funky 20: weirdcore bitches be like 21: WHO'S DAVE 22: tiktok alt kids be like 23: and why he eepy 24: such a vibe 25: you can't kill me haha

GLEAN 1: a beautiful mix of death and love 2: i love being alive dude 3: new superhero idea MARVEL GET ON IT 4: this is goofy ahh 5: bro i'm just tryna get you to like me 6: wow what an amazing connection to the real world 7: fight me 8: it's giving musical 9: boyfriends suck 10: incoherent 11: i'm sorry women 12: stop being a pussy 13: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 14: TRES BON 15: MORE INSTRUMENTALS???

PHONE POWER 1: you're crazy bro 2: ily but not like that 3: kidnappings are fire 4: imagination! 5: stop being mean to detroit 6: goofy ahh 7: bloody noses bro 8: i thought this was gonna be like that matt & kim song 9: 4th of july 🦅🇺🇲 10: cryptids again 11: dial-a-song song 12: shut up bitch imma haunt you 13: what this title makes no sense 14: i'm sorry woman 15: woah shapeshifting 16: better than the original frfr on god no cap big facts 17: okay... 18: self-advertisement

I LIKE FUN 1: is this gonna be over bro 2: astral projection 3: AAAA AAAAAA 4: back in my day 5: salty ass bitch 6: this slaps so hard 7: I LIKE FUN BRO 8: banger 9: microphone 10: take a walk on the sunny side 11: turn on the lights 12: aaa nessie 13: what 14: nick offerman 15: WE DIE ALONE WE DIE AFRAID WE LIVE IN TERROR WE'RE NAKED AND ALONE AND THE GRAVE IS THE LONELIEST PLACE

BOOK 1: just to refresh your memory (our last album was from 2018) 2: aaaah di ahh di ah di ah di yay 3: everyone hates me bro 4: CAN'T CUT IT AS AN ARTIST 5: snow 6: it's not just for winnipeg 7: aw man what happened to my dream 8: stupid clown 9: poison is epic 10: where the fuck is thursday 11: you wanna believe me but you can't 12: i'm super cool 13: hmmm 14: i ain't a clown 15: 0 is less than 1

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justnerdthings · 3 years ago

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I feel like Johnny would jam to Bruno Mars' 24K Magic.

Tonight I just want to take you higher Throw your hands up in the sky Let's set this party off right

Players, put yo' pinky rings up to the moon Girls, what y'all trying to do? Twenty four karat magic in the air Head to toe so player Look out uh

Pop pop, it's show time (show time) Show time (show time) Guess who's back again? Oh they don't know? (Go on tell 'em) Oh they don't know? (Go on tell 'em) I bet they know soon as we walk in (showin' up) Wearing Cuban links (ya) Designer minks (ya) Inglewood's finest shoes (whoop, whoop) Don't look too hard might hurt ya'self Known to give the color red the blues

Oh shit, I'm a dangerous man with some money in my pocket (keep up) So many pretty girls around me and they waking up the rocket (keep up) Why you mad, fix ya face, ain't my fault y'all be jocking (keep up)

Players only, come on Put your pinky rings up to the moon Girls, what y'all trying to do? Twenty four karat magic in the air Head to toe so player Uh, look out!

Second verse for the hustlas (hustlas) gangstas (gangstas) Bad bitches and ya ugly ass friends (haha) Can I preach? (uh oh) can I preach? (uh oh) I gotta show 'em how a pimp get it in First, take your sip (sip), do your dip (dip) Spend your money like money ain't shit (whoop, whoop) We too fresh Got to blame in on Jesus Hashtag blessed, they ain't ready for me

I'm a dangerous man with some money in my pocket (keep up) So many pretty girls around me and they waking up the rocket (keep up) Why you mad, fix ya face, ain't my fault y'all be jocking (keep up)

Players only, come on Put your pinky rings up to the moon Hey girls What y'all trying to do? (What y'all trying to do?) Twenty four karat magic in the air Head to toe so player Uh, look out!

everywhere I go they be like Ooh, so player Everywhere I go they be like (ooh, so player ooh) Oh everywhere I go they be like (ooh, so player ooh)

Now, now, now watch me break it down like (uh) Twenty four karat, twenty four karat magic What's that sound (twenty four karat, twenty four karat magic) Come on now Twenty four karat, twenty four karat magic Don't fight the feeling, invite the feeling

Just put your pinky rings up to the moon Girls, what y'all trying to do? (Tell me what y'all trying to do) Twenty four karat magic in the air Head to toe so player (hands up!) Put your pinky rings up to the moon Girls, what y'all trying to do? (Do) Twenty four karat magic in the air Head to toe so player (twenty four karat) uh, look out

#johnny cage #mortal kombat #mortal kombat 11

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expectingtofly · 4 years ago

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SPN Stay At Home Challenge

Week 9: Undercover

After mysteriously returning from Purgatory, Castiel decides to take a break from being an angel and become a hunter. Dean is less excited about the idea, especially since he doesn't quite know where he and Castiel stand in their relationship. But he and Castiel take a case and shenanigans ensue, including, but not limited to...vampires, snakes, dramatic widows, and��Castiel wearing Dean's clothes.

(taking place sometime around 8x7/8x8 if Castiel had tried out the hunter thing for longer)

Words: ~5k

also posted on ao3

When Angels Wear Flannel

“I can’t believe you fell into that gross swamp,” Dean said, opening the door to their motel room. “Way to go, making us look professional.”

“It was a river and it was slippery,” Castiel said, walking inside in squeaking shoes. His clothes were drenched in mud, leaves, and maybe even blood.

Dean took a step back to avoid getting any of the crap on himself. “You almost fell on the body.”

“I was trying to see the bite marks on his arm!” Castiel peeled off his trench coat and brown water dripped onto the floor.

Dean grimaced. “First step to being a hunter, don’t mess up the crime scene. And take that off in the bathroom, you’re getting gross river water everywhere.” Castiel held his trench coat to his chest to stop it from dripping and went inside the bathroom. “Hurry up because we need to go talk to the wife of that dead river guy.”

“I don’t have any clean clothes,” Castiel’s voice came from the bathroom.

Dean looked through the police report he had gotten from one of the officers at the river. “Do your angel power clothes cleaning thing.”

He could almost hear Castiel’s eye roll. “I told you, Dean, I’m trying to not use my powers. I’m a hunter now.”

Dean rolled his own eyes. “You should’ve thought of that before you fell in the river.” He heard Castiel huff. Dean had gone along with Castiel’s plan to become a hunter because he thought it wouldn’t last a day. It’d been a week now and Castiel was still asking to come on cases. Dean had to admit, though, he didn’t mind too much. Sure, Castiel wasn’t much help, but Dean just liked having him close. After Purgatory, he was scared to ever let Castiel out of his sight again.

“Fine,” Dean said. “Just borrow my clothes. I didn’t bring an extra suit, though, so we’re going to have to go casual.” He rummaged through his duffel bag and pulled out an extra pair of jeans. His fingers hovered over his shirts and he settled on a milky blue flannel, pretending it was the first one he saw, not the one that best matched Castiel’s eyes. Going to the bathroom, he found Castiel washing dirt off his arms in the sink.

“Vampire, right?” Castiel asked. “Because of the blood loss?”

“Right.” He handed Castiel his clothes and Castiel wrinkled his nose. “What’s that face for? These are fine.”

“It’s just…” Castiel held up the flannel shirt.

“You’ll look like a lumberjack, I know. Get dressed.”

***

They drove to the neighborhood of the wife whose husband had been found in a river this morning, half-submerged in mud. He’d been declared missing a week ago and had only been found now, nearly drained of blood with two small puncture marks on his wrist. The police didn’t know what to think, which usually meant a supernatural-related death, so Dean and Castiel had taken the case.

“Alright, we’re reporters, writing a story about the death of this woman’s husband.” Dean parked in front of the widow’s house—or better, mansion. He looked up at the large, three story pristine white house and its wrap-around porch and manicured lawns.

Castiel held open the police report on his lap and fiddled with the sleeve of his—Dean’s—shirt. “Helen Roylott. 42 years old. Herpetologist.”

“She studies herpes?”

“Reptiles.” Castiel buttoned and unbuttoned the cuff of the sleeve.

“Roll the sleeves up.” Castiel started to and Dean leaned over. “Like this.” He took Castiel’s arm and rolled up the sleeves for him.

“This is a very comfortable shirt,” Castiel said.

“Yeah, well, don’t get too comfy. I’m going to need it back.”

Castiel looked at himself in the rearview mirror and smiled. “Maybe I should wear clothes like this more often.”

“Uh, no. We’re not going to wear matching clothes.”

“But it makes me look more like a hunter. I could pass as a Winchester now.”

“You’re forgetting that you still look dorky.”

Castiel narrowed his eyes and Dean finished rolling up his sleeves. He sat back. “Okay, be polite, act sad, try not to trip over your own two feet.”

He didn’t bother looking at Castiel, knowing the bitch-face he’d see. He got out of the car and started towards the house, checking to make sure the business card he’d grabbed was the correct one. Castiel did look strange wearing Dean’s objectively normal clothes, though in an adorable sort of way, Dean had to admit. Adorable? Gross, Dean thought, shaking his head.

He rang the doorbell and in a few seconds a woman in a long, silky black robe opened the door. She looked at them over a lacy black handkerchief which she held to her teary eyes. “I suppose you’ve heard the news,” she said without introduction. She leaned on the doorframe and slumped her shoulders. “It’s simply tragic.”

“Umm, yes,” Dean started. The woman, who he was assuming was Helen, dabbed an eye and looked over Dean’s shoulder at Castiel. “We’re from the Gazette,” Dean said. “We wanted to ask a few questions about your husband’s death.”

“Ah, the greedy press,” Helen said with a sigh. “Oh well, you must do your job.” She stepped back, motioning for them to come in.

“Nice bathrobe,” Dean commented as he walked past her.

She brightened. “Oh thank you. It’s real mink fur.” Dean tried to keep the smile on his face.

They stood in a wide foyer with a curved, marble staircase. Helen shut the door behind Castiel and touched his arm. “And what’s your name, darling?” she asked, her voice echoing in the wide space.

“Um,” Castiel looked at Dean for help. “I’m Arthur, this is Conan.” Dean sighed.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Helen pointed to a room off the foyer. “You two have a seat in here. I’ll tell my maid to bring some tea.”

Dean and Castiel obediently went into the sitting room off the foyer. A purple sofa lined one wall and faced two matching purple armchairs. Hearing Helen’s footsteps fade, Dean turned on Castiel. “Arthur? Conan? What the hell?”

Castiel sat on the sofa. “I was improvising. I think I did quite well.”

Dean shook his head. “We need to work on your aliases.” Walking up to the fireplace, he looked at a large painting hanging over the mantle. It was a portrait of, he assumed, a younger Helen. She wore a looping ring on her finger which, he realized as he peered closer, was a silver snake. “Creepy,” he muttered.

He heard Helen tapping back—she must be wearing high heels under her robe, he realized—and sat next to Castiel.

Helen came into the room still dabbing her eyes. She settled herself onto one of the armchairs and sighed. “I’m so sorry you never met my late husband George. He was such a kind soul.” She gestured to her portrait over the fireplace. “He commissioned this for me, such a dear.”

“Yes, very nice,” Dean said. “So, Mrs. Roylott—”

“Call me Widow Roylott,” she said. “I’m afraid that’s what I am now.”

“Alright,” Dean said, shooting Castiel a you-see-this-crazy-bullshit-too-right? look. “Your husband went missing May 12th, correct?”

“Oh, let me see. Yes, it was the night of May 12th. We retired to bed and when I woke up that morning, he was gone. I assumed he was at work. It was only that night when he did not return that I began to panic.”

“Is there anywhere he might have gone after work?”

“I don’t know. Perhaps he went to the golf club with his friends, though no one ever mentioned anything to me. Thank you dear.” A maid had walked into the room and set a tray with tea cups and small pastries onto the table in between the seating.

Widow Roylott took the tea cup the maid poured for her. “You two are the first reporters to show up here,” she said. “I was expecting more pesky intrusions, though, I must say, I wouldn’t mind if all reporters were so handsome.” She peered over her tea cup at Castiel and winked.

“Thank you,” Castiel said. He glanced at Dean. “I wouldn’t mind my job so much if all the widows were so beautiful.”

What the fuck? Dean mouthed at him and Castiel frowned. Flirting? Dean thought. The Cas he knew would’ve frozen up at a compliment, or taken it too literally and made everything even more awkward.

“Oh, you’re too sweet.” Widow Roylott leaned forward and touched Castiel’s arm. Dean rolled his eyes and grabbed one of the small cookies on the tray. “Such a nice jacket,” she said. “Where did you get it?”

Having had enough of this bullshit, Dean spoke up, “He’s taken.” It wasn’t true, but hopefully it would shut this absurd widow up. Then again, maybe he was the absurd one for getting jealous.

Castiel looked confused. “Um, right,” he said. “I have a boyfriend. His name is Dean.” Dean nearly choked on the cookie he was eating.

“Oh, the good ones are always taken,” Widow Roylott sighed. “Well, give me a call if Dean ever dies of mysterious circumstances.” She leaned forward to grab a cookie off the tray and glanced up at them. “I’m only joking!” She laughed.

Dean cleared his throat and stood, “Can I use your restroom?” He’d be damned before he drank out of a teacup and this conversation made death by vampire look merciful.

Widow Roylott waved her hand. “Yes, Charlotte, please show him the way.” Dean followed the maid, Charlotte, and looked back at Castiel. Ask questions, he mouthed.

As he left the room, he heard Castiel ask Widow Roylott, “So you study reptiles?” Dean rolled his eyes. About the case, idiot.

“Second door on the left,” Charlotte said, pointing down a long hallway.

“Thanks.” He headed in that direction and waited until Charlotte had disappeared around the corner, then backtracked and went up to the second floor where he started trying different doors, trying to find the master bedroom,

He wasn’t going to lie, hearing Castiel say he had a boyfriend named Dean gave him a small satisfaction. Only problem: he and Castiel weren’t dating. Yes, Castiel was back from Purgatory, yes, they were on a case together, and, yes, Dean was damn glad to have him back, but, at the same time, he and Castiel were most definitely not together. Did Castiel think they were? He sure didn’t act like it. This was the first time since Purgatory that he and Dean were together alone for an extended period of time, and they’d fallen right back into the easy, teasing, ignore-any-feelings relationship they’d had before.

And, yes, Dean supposed he hadn’t done much to change that, but Castiel was...different. Everything was different now and he didn’t know where they stood. Not to mention, he was still trying to wrap his mind around Purgatory, where Dean had actually thought that, for once, he and Castiel were on the same page about their feelings for each other. But then Castiel had chosen literal monster hell over returning with Dean—and if that didn’t say something about Castiel’s feelings, what did?

Dean shook his head and tried two tall french doors. They opened to reveal a large room with a wide poster bed. The closets and dresser drawers were open, revealing their contents. It seemed Widow Roylott was in the middle of packing. But what was strangest of all was a large, empty glass tank in the corner of the room. Dean walked up to it and peered inside. It smelled like disinfecting solution.

He poked around in some of the drawers. All women’s clothes. Then he noticed several cardboard boxes stacked in one of the closets—there were three closets in total. He opened a box and found men’s clothing. So Widow Roylott moved on quickly.

As he crouched down to look in another box, something under the bed caught his eye. Reaching under the bed, his fingers touched something dry which nearly crumbled at his touch. Delicately, he pulled it out, then yanked his hand away and stared down at what he’d found. A long snake skin.

“Well, look at the time,” Dean said, walking into the sitting room. “Looks like we better get going, right Cas—Arthur?”

Castiel and Widow Roylott looked up at him. He was momentarily surprised to see Castiel in his own clothes, forgetting for a moment that Castiel wouldn’t be wearing his trench coat. He and Widow Roylott were bent over a box of what, Dean couldn’t tell, resting on the glass table between them.

“Oh, umm, yes.” Castiel stood. “Nice to meet you, Helen.”

So they’re on first name basis now, Dean thought. He put his hand on Castiel’s back and half-pushed him out of the room. “We can come back another time to complete our interview,” Dean said to Widow Roylott. “Or maybe just send an email, talk on the phone.”

“An email will have to do,” she said as she followed them into the foyer. “I’m moving this weekend. I’m afraid this house holds too many memories.” She produced her handkerchief to again dab at her eyes.

“Are you bringing any snakes with you?” Dean asked. “I’m assuming you have some, being a…” he forgot the word and improvised, “Reptilian.”

“Herpetologist,’” Castiel said quickly.

Widow Roylott’s eye twitched. “Oh, no, I don’t keep snakes here. I like to keep my work and home life separate.” She opened the door and put on what seemed to be a forced smile. “Well, adieu, my darlings. And thank you for your visit and sympathies.” She patted Castiel on the shoulder and shut the door behind them.

“Creepy, creepy, creepy,” Dean said, shuddering as they walked down the pathway back to the Impala.

“She had an impressive collection of rattlesnake rattlers,” Castiel said.

“That’s what you were looking at? Gross. Ew.” Dean pulled out his keys and unlocked the car. He’d told himself he wasn’t going to mention it, but he couldn’t help say, “Looks like you two got along well together.”

Castiel frowned. “I was only trying to work the case. Isn’t that what you do? Flirt with the women to earn their trust?”

“What? No! It sounds so creepy when you say it like that.”

Castiel shrugged. “Did you find anything in her house?”

“Yeah, a snake skin.” Dean got in the car. “Under her bed. It was massive. And a big tank. I don’t care what she says, she’s keeping a snake there. Or multiple.” He shuddered again.

“Why would she lie about that?” Castiel asked, shutting his door.

“Because having a big snake tank in your bedroom is freaking weird. Did you learn anything from her?”

“I learned the latin names for different kinds of rattlesnakes.”

“Very helpful,” Dean muttered. He glanced at Castiel, wondering what the whole “boyfriend named Dean thing” was about. He cleared his throat. “You know, Cas, that we’re not dating, right?” Castiel looked at him and Dean hastened to say, “I mean, I know you’re back now and we’re going on cases together, but—”

“I know, Dean. I was only lying when I said I had a boyfriend.”

“Named Dean.”

“It was the first name that came to my head.” He looked at Dean. “That is the number one skill of being a hunter, right? Lying? I think I’m becoming a very good hunter.”

Dean shook his head and turned the key in the ignition. Not the answer he was expecting, though a much easier one to deal with. “Alright, to that golf club Helen mentioned, I guess. Maybe our vampire is a golfer. Long as he doesn’t collect snakes.”

***

“Well that was a bust.” Dean took a drink from his beer. No one at the golf club had seen Mr. Roylott on May 12th or since. Dean had even asked the owner of the bar in which he and Castiel now sat, but he had never seen Mr. Roylott, which wasn’t a surprise. Dean couldn’t see mink bathrobe Helen coming to a dive bar.

“Maybe the vampire was only passing through when he killed Mr. Roylott,” Castiel suggested.

“Sam did say there haven’t been any signs of a vamp nest around here.” Dean shrugged. “I don’t know, man, I don’t know where to go next from here.”

Castiel ran his finger down the condensation on the neck of his beer bottle. “Does this happen often? That you and Sam can’t solve cases?”

“Not often. But, yeah, sure. Sometimes you just have to call it quits.”

Castiel wiped his hands on his—Dean’s—jeans. “Why did you buy these clothes?” The way he changed subjects so quickly gave Dean whiplash. It was like his mind ran a million miles an hour and Dean had to run to keep up.

“I don’t know. I liked the color of the shirt, I guess. Jeans were on sale.”

Castiel nodded thoughtfully. “I wear the trench coat and suit because they were the last thing Jimmy Novak ever put on.”

“We can go shopping for clothes for you, if you want,” Dean said.

“I don’t know.” Castiel looked down at Dean’s shirt. “Maybe I should get new clothes.”

“I like the trench coat.” Castiel looked up at him and Dean tried to amend, “I mean, it’s kinda your look, right?”

“I think I need to try something different.” Castiel stared at his still full beer bottle.

“Alright, what’s with this whole hunter thing?” Dean asked.

“Being an angel...” Castiel seemed to search for words. “It’s overrated. Besides, I’ve been an angel for millenia. I want to try something new.”

“Hmm.” Guess he had a point. Finishing his own beer, Dean grabbed Castiel’s and Castiel stood up from his chair.

“Teach me how to play darts. That is something hunters do, right?”

“Well, this one does, at least.” Dean stood and grabbed the darts from the dartboard on the wall. He handed them to Castiel. “You go first. You get three tries at a time. Try to hit a section with the highest number, or the bullseye for the most points.”

Castiel squinted at the board, and Dean thought that if he scanned the room quickly, he might not even recognize Castiel in this outfit. He didn’t understand why Castiel felt the need to change his identity. Did this have something to do with him? Was this the angel equivalent of getting a new haircut after a breakup?

Castiel threw the dart at the board and it landed in the bullseye. “This isn’t very fun,” Castiel remarked.

“You’re too good at it,” Dean said. “Try not using your angel voodoo.”

“I wasn’t! I can't help it."

It wasn’t so much the clothes that was bothering Dean about Castiel. It was that Dean had felt the closest he’d ever felt to Castiel in Purgatory. Now he didn’t know what was going on between them. The frustration of not knowing who Castiel was or what he wanted was only exacerbated when Castiel wasn’t even dressing like himself and was trying to act like someone new.

Castiel threw another dart and it landed right next to his first. “Son of a bitch!”

Dean had been in the process of grabbing his beer bottle; at Castiel's exclamation, he nearly dropped it, splashing beer onto his hand, and swore. Castiel turned to look at him, smiling.

“What the fuck was that?” Dean asked.

Castiel tried to look innocent. “What?”

“You don’t say that, I say that. Pick your own catchphrase.”

“Fine.” Castiel turned back to the dartboard. Dean shook his head. He needed his angel back, now.

***

“Sam said he’ll be here tomorrow,” Dean said, looking down at his phone as he sat down on the motel bed. “Maybe he’ll be able to help with this case.”

“Okay.” Castiel sat down at a small table in the corner of the room.

Dean set his phone down and ran a hand over his face. “Well, I’m going to sleep.” Castiel nodded. “You gonna sit there all night?”

Castiel shrugged. Dean pulled back the covers on the bed and lay down. He started to turn off the light, then glanced at Castiel. The angel was staring down at his hands, or maybe at Dean’s clothes which he was still wearing. “You can lie down here, if you want,” Dean said. Castiel looked up at him. “It’s got to be more comfortable than that chair.”

Castiel studied him, then nodded and came over. Dean slid over and Castiel untied his—Dean’s—boots and set them down on the ground. He laid down under the covers, still in Dean’s jacket and clothes.

Dean turned off the light and they lay there in the dark. It was more comforting lying next to Castiel than Dean wanted to admit. In Purgatory they’d slept close for safety—so they said, though he and Castiel might have abused the excuse. Benny mercifully turned a blind eye to the fact that Dean and Castiel were practically sleeping in each others’ arms.

He could feel his own jacket against his arm and Castiel shifted, pressing his arm closer against Dean’s. Dean took it back; lying here next to Castiel wasn’t so much a comfort as it was torture. He’d been itching for a chance to take Castiel into his arms ever since Castiel returned. But he hadn’t when Castiel first appeared—bloody, dirty, tired, but alive —and he worried he’d lost his chance. Maybe Castiel had taken his stunned, stilted response as proof that whatever they’d had in Purgatory was over.

Because they had had something. Dean might have put on a brave face in Purgatory, might have continually promised Benny and Castiel that they would get out, that they would live, but deep down he’d been the most terrified he’d ever been. So terrified, he said things he’d never said before to Castiel because he feared, more than dying itself, dying without ever saying them.

“Listen, Cas,” Dean said, staring up at the ceiling. His words were loud in the stillness of the room. “I said some things in Purgatory.”

“You want to take them back.”

It hurt to know that’s what Castiel immediately assumed. Dean remembered a moment in Purgatory when several Leviathan attacked, nearly overpowering him, Castiel, and Benny. He remembered how Castiel grabbed his hand to pull him to his feet after they’d killed the last Leviathan. How, still shaking from their near deaths, Dean clutched Castiel’s hand, said, “I don’t want to ever lose you, I love you.” How he pulled Castiel into an embrace and felt a rush of relief as Castiel wrapped his arms around him, held him close.

“No,” Dean said.

A click, then the hum of the air conditioning. Dean turned his head to look at Castiel. Castiel didn’t meet his eyes. “I’m sorry, Dean, but I don’t think it’s wise. Us, together. Right now. Not with everything I’ve done.”

“Cas, I don’t care about that shit. Yeah, you messed up, but so have I, a thousand times. If anyone should be using that excuse, it should be me.”

Castiel shook his head. He started to speak, and then he was gone.

Damn angel, Dean thought. Castiel had said he wasn’t going to use his wings.

Rolling over, he stared at the neon red numbers on the alarm clock until they wavered in his vision when he looked elsewhere. So everything they’d gone through in Purgatory meant absolutely nothing. But he knew that already, didn’t he? Castiel had stayed behind. Castiel wasn’t fueled by the same consuming need to be together, always, which had urged Dean through Purgatory, had kept him searching, praying, hoping.

A memory rose. Stopping for the night in their search for the portal and sitting next to Castiel, exhausted. Leaning against Castiel’s shoulder and shutting his eyes for a moment, too afraid to put down his guard for any longer.

“I wish it didn’t have to be this way,” Castiel had said quietly, and Dean had thought he known what he meant.

***

Dean woke to his phone ringing. Half-sitting up, he groped for his phone on the nightstand, found it, and answered it. “Hello?”

“Agent Russell?” the voice said. “Police commissioner Anderson here. You should come down to Mrs. Roylott’s house. You’re going to want to see this.”

As if this case couldn’t get any weirder. Dean hung up and looked around the room. Castiel was still gone. Worried, he checked his phone to see if Castiel had texted him, but of course he hadn’t.

Dean thought briefly of praying to him, telling him to come back, but decided against it. Praying to Castiel had become a habit in Purgatory, one he wasn’t eager to pick back up again. Those prayers had been fueled by desperation, were probably what Castiel was referring to when he gave Dean a chance to take his words back. I love you, I need you, I can’t go on, come back, please.

Dean swung his legs off the bed and heard the motel room door open. He looked over his shoulder to see Castiel walk inside and turned away before the relief he felt showed on his face.

“Good morning,” Castiel said, shutting the door. He held up a brown bag. “I brought you breakfast.” He was still wearing Dean’s clothes, albeit without the boots. He seemed oblivious to that fact, as well as unconcerned that he had disappeared last night without warning.

Dean stood. “We need to go. Something happened at that widow’s house.”

“Oh.” Castiel set the paper bag on the table. Dean opened his duffle bag and pulled out something to wear. “My clothes are still dirty.”

“Then keep wearing mine.”

Castiel came over and grabbed one of Dean’s shirts out of his bag, a dark green flannel. “Can I wear this one?”

“What’s wrong with the one you have on?”

“I like this color more.”

I’ve created a monster, Dean thought. He’d be lucky if Castiel didn’t steal every piece of clothing he owned.

He headed to the bathroom to change and thought of asking where Castiel had been all night. Instead, he said, “I want that shirt back.” What he really meant, he supposed, was I want the old Cas back. The one who’d held him in Purgatory, the one who always came when he called. The one who—Dean knew—despite the fights and betrayals, despite never saying the words aloud, loved him too.

***

Police cars and an ambulance crowded the street outside of Mrs. Roylott’s house. Dean and Castiel got out of the Impala and flashed their badges at the police officers trying to keep curious bystanders at bay.

The police commissioner turned to look at them as they walked over. “Well, agents,” she said, “looks like your work here is done.”

“Why? What happened?” Dean noticed the large tank he’d seen in Mrs. Roylott’s bedroom now standing on the lawn.

“Mrs. Roylott is dead. Snake bite. Same thing that killed her husband.”

“Snake?” Dean asked.

“Last night, the coroner found traces of venom in Mr. Roylott’s body. We’ve arrested the maid for being an accomplice in the murder. Says Mrs. Roylott released the snake while Mr. Roylott was sleeping, then drained his body to get rid of the venom. The maid dumped his body in the river.”

Dean blinked. “Wow.”

“If the snake hadn’t gotten loose from the basement last night and killed Mrs. Roylott, she’d be halfway to Costa Rica right now banking on a life insurance check. Excuse me, will you?” The police commissioner turned to talk to another police officer and Dean looked at Castiel.

“Guess we should’ve seen that coming.”

“No vampires?” Castiel asked.

“Nope. Just a deranged lady.” He spotted people coming out the house transporting a large snake. Its tongue flicked the air and Dean shuddered. Everything about this case was wrong. Castiel was trying to act like a hunter in Dean’s clothes, the monster of the week turned out to be a creepy snake lady, and Dean, for once, wanted to be with Castiel, had even said as much, but Castiel had said no.

Dean turned from looking at the snake. “Alright, time to go.”

As they walked back to the Impala, Castiel complained, “When am I going to get to solve a case?”

“That’s your takeaway from this?” Dean asked. “That lady sicced her pet snake on her husband.”

“I should’ve been able to tell there was something off with her. I’m an angel, Dean. I should be good at hunting.” He opened the door to the passenger side of the Impala and sat inside.

Dean got in the Impala and pulled his door shut. “Give it a few years, you’ll learn.”

Castiel sighed. “Maybe I am a better angel than hunter.”

Dean didn’t respond to what seemed an obvious fact and Castiel huffed. He pulled off Dean’s jacket and threw it onto the back seat.

“You don’t want to be a hunter anyway,” Dean said. “It’s a shitty life.” He started the Impala and glanced at Castiel staring moodily out the windshield. “So...you gonna quit, go back to Heaven?” Castiel shrugged. “Sam and I don’t mind having you around.” Please don’t leave.

“I’m sure the angels don’t want me,” Castiel said. “So I suppose I’ll stay with you and Sam.”

Good to know; Dean was Castiel’s last choice. Relieved all the same, he smiled at Castiel. “We like angel you just fine anyway,” he said.

Back in their room, Dean packed up their things as Castiel threw his dirty clothes in the wash. Dean met him in the motel’s laundry room and found Castiel pulling his trench coat out of the dryer. He shook his head as Castiel pulled it to his face, smiling.

“Ah, nice and warm,” Castiel said. He pulled his trench coat on over Dean’s clothes, which created an odd-mismatched look. Still, it was better than nothing; Castiel looked marginally more like himself. Dean found himself hoping that he and Castiel could start over. Forget all the years of tiptoeing around their desire for each other, forget the tortured, confessional year in Purgatory. Maybe Castiel would come around. Dean had, hadn’t he?

“You are planning on returning my clothes, right?” Dean asked.

“Mmhmm,” Castiel agreed noncommittally, smoothing his sleeves. “Maybe instead of coming on cases, I can man the phones for you and Sam.”

“Right, you can be our secretary,” Dean said and Castiel nodded eagerly, not catching the sarcasm.

Dean rolled his eyes and shoved the rest of Castiel’s clean clothes into his duffel bag. “Come on, let’s get going.” As Castiel walked past him, he had the urge to pull Castiel close and feel the familiar texture of the trench coat, the warmth of Castiel’s body against his. He settled for putting his hand on Castiel’s shoulder.

“Can I drive?” Castiel asked, looking up at him.

“Not a chance.” Maybe he hadn’t ever said enough, even in Purgatory. He knew there was plenty he wanted to say now, wanted to do, wanted to prove. “But if you really like the shirt, you can keep it.” It still wasn’t enough, but he’d find a way. He wasn’t going to lose Castiel again.

Thanks to @helianthus21 @bend-me-shape-me @pray4jensen for this challenge!! These have been such good prompts and I’m writing more than I have in ages so thanks for the inspo :)

Tagging: @spnwaywardone @good-things-do-happen-dean @becky-srs

Let me know if you’d like to be tagged in my destiel fics!

#spnstayathome #destiel fic #hunter castiel #castiel wears dean's clothes #spn fic #expectingtofly writes #this started out as just a silly fic #and then it became angsty #whoops #inspired by the adventure of the speckled band by sir arthur conan doyle #touch starved dean #purgaytory #idk why the widow is so extra #she just is #expectingtoflywrites

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anubislover · 5 years ago

Text

Not So Easily Replaced

(Ikkaku is pissed at how idiotic her crew has been while on Amazon Lily, so she does what she's always done - vents about it to Law to let off some steam. Unfortunately, when an argument breaks out between them, she's left to wonder if she's really appreciated by her nakama)

“Ugh!” Ikkaku growled, stomping into Law’s office with his second afternoon coffee and a selection of onigiri on a tray. Normally lunch delivery wasn’t her job, but since all the men had been “too busy” fawning over the women of Amazon Lily outside, the menial task had fallen to her; otherwise their workaholic captain wouldn’t eat. “I swear, Boss, if we don’t set sail soon, I’m going to strangle every guy on board!”

“Hmmm,” Law grunted absently as he poured over his notes. Ikkaku didn’t hold his monosyllabic response against him—he’d spent the past few days fixing up that Straw Hat kid and the Fishman. On top of that, the extensive treatments had basically depleted their medical supplies, Straw Hat’s freak-out upon waking up had wrecked more than half the operatory, and the Kuja had been pretty stingy with letting them replenish their food and water from the island, so she was sure he had plenty on his mind. The dark bags under his eyes attested to that.

That didn’t mean she wasn’t going to vent, though. Honestly, if she didn’t, she’d probably snap and end up going on a killing spree or something. Only Bepo and Law would be spared; the Mink had no interest in human women and thus hadn’t been an obnoxious Neanderthal, and Law had been too focused on keeping his patients and crew alive to drool over Boa Hancock.

Hell, when her captain was like this, Ikkaku could literally say anything and he wouldn’t even register it. It took a lot to snap Law out of his thoughts, and he’d never really seemed to mind when she ranted at him to let off steam. Mainly because once she was done, she was usually calm enough to take care of the situation herself, leaving Law in peace and with a non-murdered crew. A happy engineer made for a happy submarine, after all.

Setting the coffee and onigiri down onto the desk, Ikkaku continued, “They act like they’ve never seen a hot chick in their lives. I mean, what am I, chopped liver? They should be thanking the gods that they get to look at my gorgeous face every damn day!” The statement was accompanied by a dramatic toss of her curly hair. When Ikkaku felt strongly about something, she tended to gesticulate a lot, and this was no exception.

“Uh huh.”

She leaned against the edge of Law’s desk, hands waving about as she ranted. “Not that I want them to start lusting after me, but it hurts a girl’s pride, ya know? They could at least acknowledge what a hot piece of ass I am instead of acting like I’m some ugly hag.” She clenched her fist as she recalled how, just that morning, Shachi and Clione had basically given a lecture to the whole crew over breakfast about the superior physique the Kuja displayed compared to the average woman. There had been charts and everything, and to her dismay the silhouette for the “average” woman looked suspiciously like her.

“And that’s not the end of it!” she rambled on, smacking her hand against the desk for emphasis. “When I’m not ignored or insulted, they try to convince me to go out into the jungle to talk to the Kuja for them! I mean, I’m probably the one least likely to be killed outright, but it’s not guaranteed! They might fill me with arrows just for being affiliated with men! Are they really willing to risk my life like that?”

Her question didn’t get an answer—not because Law wasn’t paying attention, but because at that moment, her emotive gesticulating accidentally smacked her wrist into his coffee mug, knocking it over.

“Mother fucker!” Law shouted, scalding coffee spilling all over his crotch and papers.

“Oh my god, Law, I’m so sorry—”

“Will you shut up?!” he snapped, grabbing his nearby lab coat to frantically soak up the scalding coffee that had spilled across his crotch. “Don’t just stand there—get some towels!”

Nodding mutely, she ran to the en-suite bathroom and snatched up every towel she could find in the cupboard. “Here,” she said, trying to hand them to him so he could clean himself up.

“My desk, damn it! Save my notes!”

Immediately she swept the pile furthest from the spill to the floor and began patting down the desk, but she knew it was already too late; the coffee had completely soaked through several of the papers that had been strewn across the stainless steel surface.

“Law, really, I’m so sorry!” she apologized hoarsely, flinching as he turned the full force of his sleep-deprived glare upon her.

“Maybe if you’d fucking been watching what you were doing instead of ranting on and on, none of this would have happened!” he shouted, well and truly pissed. Not that she blamed him—a week’s worth of important medical and inventory notes was now a brown, sopping mess. On top of that, first-degree crotch burns would sour anyone’s mood, especially when they were only running on an average of three hours of sleep.

“It’ll be ok,” she assured, assessing the damage. To an average person, the mess was a disaster, but while the charts and notes that had been in the immediate spill zone were soaked through and ruined, many of the others could be salvaged thanks to Law’s powers. “Just Room the coffee out of the papers—”

“Do you have any idea how much time and effort you just flushed down the toilet?” he snapped, even as the familiar blue bubble filled the office. Drops of coffee were pulled from the sheets of paper like magic, but to Ikkaku’s dismay, much of the ink left behind was still smudged beyond recognition. “You’re lucky that wasn’t Mugiwara-ya’s medical file you just destroyed!”

“Law, really, I’m sorry,” she said, trying to calm him down. Her usually chill captain was far more volatile when stressed and sleep-deprived. “It was a stupid accident on my part. I’ll help you rewrite all of this.”

“Hell no,” he growled, gold eyes narrowing furiously, the tendons in his thin neck tightening as he ground his teeth together. “The last thing I need is you going on another stupid rant and ruining my notes again. Get the fuck out—I’ve got more important things to do than listen to you bitch and moan about how the guys aren’t paying attention to you.”

“Tha—that’s not what I’m angry about at all!” she snapped.

“Then what is your fucking problem?!”

“My problem is that the guys were being jackasses and I’m not appreciated around here!”

“Well if you don’t like it, leave!”

Ikkaku’s back stiffened, each syllable cutting into her heart like Law’s sharpest scalpel. Those words…it was the exact same thing her old boss would say whenever she complained about her asshole coworkers’ creepy leers or “accidental” groping. The greasy old mechanic was a sexist pig, but still the only one in that shit port that had been willing to take her on as an apprentice. It had always been an unspoken threat—if she left, no one else would hire her, so she could kiss her dreams of becoming a world-class engineer good-bye.

Trafalgar Law had changed that with his offer to join the Heart Pirates.

And now he was telling her to leave, too. To give up her dream, her nakama, and her home because she wasn’t willing to put up with a little sexism.

As if he could replace her in a heartbeat.

The thought hurt more than expected. She’d worked her ass off aboard the Polar Tang. For five years she’d toiled in the heart of the engine room, maintaining every little piece. She kept the gears turning, the motors humming, and the propellers running. Just from sound and the slightest vibrations through the ship, she knew exactly what was wrong with the engine at any given time.

Ikkaku had never asked for praise or recognition for her hard work—it was just her job. But she was as knowledgeable about the mechanisms of the submarine as Law was of the human body. She had always assumed he’d quietly acknowledged this fact and respected her for it.

Clearly, she’d been wrong.

She nearly screamed all this at him, but before she could open her mouth, the blue light of Law’s Room encased her, and in a blink, she was out in the hall, the cabin door slamming shut in her face.

Knowing better than to try and force her way back into his quarters, Ikkaku instead stormed down the steel hallway, fists clenched and muttering furiously to herself. Maybe she would leave. March right up to Boa Hancock and ask to join the Kuja. That would show them! She didn’t need Law, or the Tang, or men at all! She’d get along just fine without those jerks! Sure, Amazon Lily didn’t have any of the high-tech machinery she was used to, and working for a shichibukai wasn’t exactly something she was thrilled about, but at least they’d appreciate her, right? She had other skills—she was a hell of a tattoo artist, and was a damn fine shot, and could kickbox, and…

Her pace slowed as her heart forced her brain to accept the truth—she didn’t want to leave. She’d go crazy without machines and engines to work on. And sure, she was no slouch in a fight, but the Kuja were warrior women trained from birth. Ikkaku would look like a total weakling next to them.

And no matter how much the crew pissed her off, she wouldn’t trade her nakama for anything. Sure, they could be thoughtless jerks sometimes, but they could also be really sweet. Bepo may not have been much for girl talk, but he was always willing to lend an ear if she needed companionship. Her fellow engineers, Malamute and Skua, were dependable and shared her love of machines. Shachi was always down to help her pull a prank, and when he wasn’t drooling over the Kuja, Penguin could be counted on to talk her through her problems.

As for Law…by this point, he was more like her big brother than her actual brothers had been. They shared a similar devious sense of humor, was discreet about any feminine issues she might have that, as the ship’s doctor, he was forced to deal with, and he’d even played wingman for her a few times at the taverns they’d stopped in.

Had she just ruined all of that? Was Law just angry, or had this been coming for a long time? Law had threatened to fire her plenty of times in the past, usually in response to her back sassing him, but he’d never been serious about it. This time had been different—he’d been legitimately pissed at her. Maybe those teasing threats hadn’t been jokes, but subtle warnings, and her ruining all those papers had simply been the straw to break the camel’s back?

Ikkaku was deep in thought, mentally going over every encounter she’d had with Law with a fine-toothed comb, searching for any clue whether he seriously thought she should leave, when she quite literally bumped into Bepo.

The Mink took in her flushed, angry expression and asked, “Are you ok, Ikkaku?”

Oddly enough, it was that simple, gentle question that shattered her composure like a bullet through a bone, and without even thinking she buried her face in his soft fur and just broke down crying. “He told me to leave, Bepo,” she sobbed, scared and hurt and frustrated. For all the grief her crewmates had given her and all the dangerous positions being a pirate had put her in, Ikkaku loved being a Heart. Where would she go? She’d never find another ship like the Polar Tang. Another crew like the Heart Pirates. Another captain like Trafalgar Law.

Bepo, though shocked that the normally fiery and confident engineer was using his fur as a tissue, didn’t say anything—he just carefully rubbed her back and hoped that letting her treat him like a massive teddy bear would calm her down enough to explain what had happened.

XXX

“Ok, real talk—has anyone noticed anything…different about Ikkaku lately?” Penguin asked as he sat down to lunch.

“You’d have to actually see her to notice something,” Shachi replied, brow furrowing. He glanced over at Uni, raising an eyebrow behind his sunglasses. “You been giving her stealth lessons or something?”

Uni frowned behind his bandana. “No, but she’s definitely avoiding us. It’s been a week since we left Amazon Lily, and I can count the number of times I’ve seen her on one hand.”

“Same,” Ermine said as they finished molding Law’s onigiri into the perfect triangles the captain liked. “I actually thought we left her behind for a minute—nearly asked Jean Bart to turn the ship around to get her.”

Malamute rubbed his chin, mouth twisting in concern. “Nah, she’s here, but she’s mad at us about something—barely leaves the engine room most days, and she basically refuses to talk to me and Skua.”

His fellow engineer nodded. “We thought it might just be her time of the month, but that ended over a week ago according to the calendar.”

“You guys keep track of her menstrual cycles?” Clione asked, weirded out. The rest of the crew wore similar expressions of disbelief and disapproval.

“Out of self-preservation!” Skua shouted defensively. “We’re in a hot, confined space where she has easy access to heavy tools—of course we wanna know when we should have emergency placating chocolate on-hand!”

“We tried the chocolate anyway, though,” Malamute added. “She just…waved it away and kept working.”

The cook’s frown deepened at that bit of information. “Ikkaku never turns down chocolate,” Ermine said, “and she hasn’t shown up to lunch, dinner, or breakfast all week.”

“She’s been eating, though, right?” Penguin asked, concerned. He didn’t care how mad she was; it was no excuse to skip out on meals. It was bad enough Law was an insomniac that got most of his nutrients through coffee and onigiri. It would be a cold day in hell before he would stand for an anorexic engineer.

A large, white paw shyly raised in the air as Bepo interjected, “I’ve been bringing her meals so she doesn’t have to come by the galley. She’s…wanted some time to herself.” He dropped his head gloomily. “Sorry.”

“But she’s talked to you?”

“Ummm, a little bit,” he muttered, twiddling his claws. After she’d stopped crying, Ikkaku had spilled her guts about everything—her issues with the crew, her argument with Law, and why his words had affected her so badly. Though sympathetic, Bepo was certain Law hadn’t meant his thoughtless words—underneath his casual persona, he cared deeply about his crew and would never let any of them go for such a silly reason.

At first, Bepo’d tried to get her to go back and talk to the captain, but she’d shot that down quickly—with the mood Law had been in, it would do nothing but start another argument. The Mink had hoped that, now that they were sailing away from Amazon Lily and Law wouldn’t have to worry about Straw Hat’s injuries anymore, they’d both cool down and the whole thing would blow over.

Unfortunately, the past week had proven otherwise. Ikkaku had taken to hiding deep in the bowels of the ship, and Law had been so focused on redoing all those notes and charts that he hadn’t left his quarters in days. Bepo wasn’t a Mink who liked confrontation, and he certainly didn’t want to choose sides between his oldest friend and his favorite engineer, so he’d relegated himself to supplying food to both parties, hoping one of them would finally get tired of the oppressive silence and breach the topic.

As the crew frantically gathered around him, hoping to finally have an answer to the Mystery of the Missing Engineer, Bepo began to wonder if he should have just locked both humans in an empty room and made them talk it out.

Not that such a plan would have been very effective with Law’s powers, but it was better than nothing.

“Talk, Bepo,” Shachi growled, pulling a flashlight out of his pocket and shining it directly into the bear’s black eyes like he was in an interrogation room. “What’s up with Ikkaku?”

“Why’s she hiding from us?” Clione interjected.

“Why are you the only one she’s talking to?” added Jude.

“Is she pregnant and going through weird mood swings or something?” Skua asked loudly.

Bepo blanched at that last one. “No, she…she’s just kind of upset about…how you all acted on Amazon Lily.”

Exasperated, Ermine rolled their eyes. “What, was she jealous about all the attention we gave Hancock’s crew?”

“No, but…you guys were really insensitive. Like, that presentation—”

“It was a joke!” Shachi defended, though a guilty blush rose to his cheeks.

“And asking her to venture into the jungle to talk to the women for you—”

“Hey, she was the only one who they wouldn’t kill on-sight!” Jude sulked.

“And then she had to bring Law his lunch because you were all too busy staring at the Kuja.”

“Wow. Having to do that one menial task must have been such an inconvenience,” Malamute scoffed.

At the back of the grumbling crowd, Jean Bart awkwardly rubbed the back of his head. He hadn’t been on the crew long, so he didn’t really think it was his place to get involved, but he had the feeling Ikkaku had taken whatever had been said and done a little more personally than they thought. “Look, regardless of how we feel, we should all apologize to her. I mean, I don’t know her great, but does she usually give the silent treatment for this long?”

“Well, no,” Clione stated, looking a bit nervous. “Typically, she yells at us and smacks us around a bit, or maybe pulls some embarrassing prank, but she’s never quiet.”

“So, what’s this mean?”

“It means this is serious.” Penguin frowned at Bepo, who was looking around anxiously as if hoping to escape. “Ok, spill. You’re the only one she’s talked to, and you clearly have a better idea of what’s going on than we do. What’s Ikkaku really upset about?”

The Mink hung his head sorrowfully. “Sorry.”

“Damn it, don’t apologize! Just tell us!”

“It’s just…”

“Are you guys bullying Bepo again?” came a voice from the doorway. The crew turned to find Law strolling into the galley, looking thinner and more exhausted than usual, but he was at least out of his room and among the living.

Still shining his flashlight in Bepo’s face, Shachi yelled, “Captain! You gotta help us—Ikkaku’s basically been AWOL all week and won’t talk to anyone, and Bepo won’t tell us why!”

Law plopped into his chair and grabbed an onigiri, scoffing as he took a large bite. “She bitched at me for a while about how you all were being sexist pigs. Figured she would have gotten over it by now.”

“She complained to you about it?” Jean Bart asked, tilting his head.

“Yeah, and then she managed to spill hot coffee on my crotch and ruin the inventory list for the infirmary that I’d spent hours compiling.”

The crew unanimously gave a sympathy wince.

Taking another large bite of his lunch, Law continued, “We’ll be making port in a few days—she’ll come to her senses once she’s spent some time off the ship.”

“You…you want her to leave the ship?” Bepo asked, voice raising an octave in disbelief.

“Time apart will do us some good,” he replied with a shrug, activating his Room for a moment to remove the flashlight from Shachi’s hand.

“How…how much time?”

“Well, we’re not making port any longer than necessary. If she hasn’t gotten her shit together by then, that’s her problem.”

Bepo’s heart dropped into his stomach. What did Law mean “get her shit together”? Was he talking about packing her things? Was he really kicking her out over a silly argument over spilled coffee and ruined paperwork?

“Law!” the Mink shouted, jerking to his feet so quickly his knees knocked the table. “Please reconsider!”

Dark blue eyebrows rose at the normally soft-spoken navigator’s outburst. “There’s nothing to reconsider. Ikkaku’s a big girl—I agree that the sexism she faced was unacceptable, but she’s never had a problem handling that kind of shit herself.” His face twisted into a scowl. “And considering how I only just finished redoing all the work she destroyed, my tolerance for temper tantrums is at an all-time low.”

“She offered to help you rewrite it!” Bepo argued, slapping his paws down on the table. “Is some soggy paperwork worth losing your best engineer over?” Pausing, he glanced at Malamute and Skua. “Uh, no offense. Sorry.”

“None taken,” the duo said in unison, though their jaws dropped a second later as they registered the Mink’s words. “Wait, what?!”

“What do you mean ‘losing’ Ikkaku?” Penguin snapped, grabbing him by the orange collar of his boiler suit.

Shachi grabbed the flashlight again and climbed onto the table to shine it into Bepo’s face. “Talk, bear! Is Ikkaku quitting or something?”

“Because we won’t let her!” several of the crew shouted.

“Everybody calm down!” Law snapped, his deep voice silencing the rambunctious crew. “You all acted like idiots around the Kuja—I don’t blame her for being annoyed at you. But if your petty acts of sexism could drive her off that easily, she wouldn’t have lasted ten minutes at her old job. You’re blowing everything out of proportion.”

“You’re the one who told her to leave over a spilled cup of coffee!” Bepo angrily stated, only to immediately shrink back when he realized just who he’d yelled at. “Sorry.”

“Whoa, wait, Law, did you fire her?” Penguin asked, genuinely horrified as he numbly released Bepo’s collar. Of all the things that could have been bothering Ikkaku, that hadn’t even made his list. Sure, she could be tempestuous, but that had never bothered Law before—on the contrary, Penguin had always assumed his old friend liked trading snarky barbs with.

“I didn’t—why would I—I was just pissed because she spilled hot coffee all over crotch!” Law defended, even as he inwardly cringed at the way his entire crew had turned to glare at him judgmentally. Shachi had even turned the flashlight’s intense beam on him.

“But was that worth actually firing her over?”

“I didn’t fire her! Yeah, we argued, but I never said she was fired. At most, I told her to get the fuck out of my office.”

“That’s not all you said,” Bepo mumbled, crossing his arms stubbornly.

Flinty gold eyes narrowed at the sulking Mink. It was extremely out of character for Bepo to snap at or sass anyone—least of all Law. His brow furrowed as he thought back to his fight with Ikkaku—the memory was a bit hazy due to the lack of sleep he’d gotten. “Then what exactly did I say to her? What could have possibly been so bad that it could make her think I’m firing her?”

“You said…she told me…” Bepo took a deep breath. He hated scolding his captain, but he hated the idea of Ikkaku leaving even more, especially if this really was just a big misunderstanding. “You said to her ‘if you don’t like it, leave’.”

A sour taste worse than umeboshi filled his mouth as Law realized the full implications of what he’d said and done. He clearly remembered her old boss, a scowling, greasy man who’d shouted at her when she’d argued that she deserved to be respected as the talented engineer she was and not just seen as eye-candy.

If you don’t like it, leave, he’d sneered through crooked teeth as the other mechanics sniggered. Good luck finding anyone else willing to hire an inexperienced chick, though. Law could distinctly remember the hot surge of outrage he’d felt on the woman’s behalf; in less than ten minutes, she’d managed to identify what was wrong with the Tang’s engine and exactly how to fix it. Yet because she was the sole female in the shop—because she was a little bit different—she was overlooked and scorned, with her boss refusing to check for himself.

It had reminded Law a little too much of how quickly he’d been rejected from every hospital Cora-san had taken him to, the so-called “expert” doctors refusing to believe that Amber Lead was not contagious, or even examine the white patches across his skin.

And maybe—just maybe—the way her curly hair fanned out around her shoulders and down her back reminded him just a tiny bit of a certain black, feathered jacket.

Law hadn’t even bothered to consider whether or not the woman might want to become a pirate before he’d activated his Room and cut her boss to pieces. He’d then turned to Ikkaku, whose dark eyes had been wide with shock but not fear, and told her that if she could fix his engine as easily as she claimed, she was welcome to join his crew.

Now he stood to lose her due to his own sleep-deprived stupidity.

“…fuck.”

XXX

Down in the engine room, Ikkaku lay on her back underneath the ship’s engine, tightening the bolts that secured the freshly-cleaned cooling pipes. Since her argument with Law she’d basically spent every waking hour disassembling, repairing, and reassembling every piece she could. She trusted Skua and Malamute to take good care of the sub after she was gone, but the Polar Tang deserved nothing less than a thorough inspection and tune-up as thanks for carrying her so far.

She’d give the crew their own goodbye once they reached port. She hoped they were still too blinded by the hearts in their eyes to notice she’d been avoiding them. It wasn’t out of anger anymore; instead, she was scared she’d start blubbering. Admitting that Law had decided to toss her out on her ass was humiliating and heartbreaking, and she honestly wasn’t sure how the others would react. They could just as easily stage a mutiny as shrug it off as her overreacting.

Perhaps she was freaking out over nothing—Law hadn’t even left his room since their fight. Surely if he really wanted her gone, he could have marooned her back on Amazon Lily. Then again, he was a sadistic bastard; luring her into a false sense of security, then dumping her and her belongings onto the next port they landed on wouldn’t be entirely out of character. Or maybe her years of service had earned her enough mercy that he was willing to wait until they were at an island where Ikkaku could potentially find work instead of stranding her in the Calm Belt.

Whatever it was, she had every intention of confronting him about it after dinner. If this was all just a big misunderstanding, she planned to give him a good smack upside the head. If she was really fired, she wanted at least enough time to pack her things and say her proper goodbyes.

Until then, all she could do was stay busy to pass the time and hope that the knot of anxiety that twisted in her stomach would loosen up by the time she talked to him.

She didn’t want to leave, but if Law decided she was really that expendable, there wasn’t much she could do but try to hold onto at least a shred of dignity.

Reaching over to her tool kit, Ikkaku fished out her screwdriver, silently lamenting over the sad state of her tools. She’d planned on picking up some new ones back on Sabaody, but with all the chaos that had taken place, she’d missed her chance, and she wasn’t sure she could justify the cost now that her job was in jeopardy.

The sharp click clack of heeled boots against the metal floor startled her out of her thoughts. Glancing towards the sound, she immediately knew from the spotted jeans that filled her vision that, for better or for worse, the mystery of her termination was about to be solved.

She watched as Law turned around, and she knew from the barely-audible creek of the pipes that he had chosen to lean against them. Ikkaku had yelled at him for doing that more than a few times in the past, but this time she kept her mouth shut. Most likely he’d done it to provoke such a reaction out of her, but why? To break the viscous tension that filled the room by establishing a sense of normalcy, or so he’d have another cause to fire her?

Whatever his reason, Ikkaku refused to be the first to speak. Whether he wanted to kick her out or extend the olive branch, he’d have to make the first move.

After a few minutes of silence where Law merely stood there and Ikkaku continued to tighten the bolts, he finally sighed. “Penguin tells me that you haven’t been eating dinner with the crew,” Law’s low, nonchalant voice rumbled through the pipes.

If Penguin had to tell you, that says that you haven’t been eating with them, either, she thought sourly, though opted to stay quiet. She didn’t want to turn this into an argument if he intended to apologize. And if he planned to fire her…well, she wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of riling her up.

Noting her unusual silence, he continued, “I understand their behavior has been…upsetting as of late. They were acting like idiots, but that’s no reason to isolate yourself.”

“Haven’t been isolating myself,” she lied, fiddling with a bolt she’d tightened ten minutes ago. “I’ve just had work to do. The Tang needed some maintenance, so I thought I’d get it done now that we weren’t being chased by Marines.”

“Sure. And the fact that Bepo’s been bringing you your meals this past week?”

“Going to the galley would have wasted time. Eating in here was more efficient, and Bepo offered.”

“Why didn’t you ask Skua and Malamute to help?”

“You doubtin’ my abilities as an engineer, Trafalgar?” she asked in a clipped tone, growing sick of tiptoeing around the point. “Whether you like it or not, I know how this ship works better than anyone. If you don’t trust me, tell them to get their asses in here and do it instead!”

There was a deep sigh from above her, and Ikkaku could easily picture the wrinkle between his eyebrows that formed when he was tired and frustrated. “Bepo told me you’re thinking of leaving.”

Ah. The moment of truth. Heart in her throat, she forced her herself to take a deep breath, ready for whatever judgement he saw fit to pass. “You’re the one who said I should if I didn’t like how I was being treated.”

“Are you?”

“Leaving or enjoying how I’m treated?”

“Leaving.”

“…I don’t want to.”

“Good.” It was subtle, but there was an unspoken “I wouldn’t have let you if you’d tried” in his tone. There was another long moment of silence before he continued, “Engineers as skilled as you are hard to come by—finding a replacement would have been a bitch. Plus, the crew would have been upset; they were practically interrogating poor Bepo about why you were avoiding them.”

“And of course you stepped in and played hero, rescuing the helpless Mink from an angry mob?” she snipped, tightening another screw. It didn’t sound like she was getting fired, so it was a little easier to let her natural sass creep back into her voice.

Law let out a faint tch above her. “I wouldn’t say ‘helpless’ considering how he then yelled at me about allegedly firing you. After that, the mob was on his side.”

A proud grin curled the corner of Ikkaku’s mouth. Who would have thought that Bepo would yell at his best friend for little old her? She’d have to come up with a nice thank you gift for her favorite shipmate. With luck, Law might actually apologize for his behavior if even Bepo was calling him out.

Of course, that might take a while, so it was best to keep busy. Reaching out her hand, Ikkaku felt around blindly for her socket wrench. She jerked slightly in surprise when she felt long fingers wrap around her hand before the tool in question was placed firmly in her palm. She pulled her arm back, only to stare wordlessly at the brand-new wrench that practically gleamed in the light.

Clumsily she slid out from under the pipes, jaw dropping as she found Law crouching beside a new, expensive, top-of-the-line tool kit. “I was saving this for your birthday but given the chance that you wouldn’t be around to receive it…” he trailed off, adjusting his hat so the brim cast a shadow over his face.

The corners of her eyes crinkled as she smiled, immediately recognizing the gift for the chrome apology that it was. Plus, it was hard to stay mad at Law when he was like this—honestly, it was so dang cute how awkward he was when forced to display actual human emotions like caring and guilt. “You bribing me to stay, Boss?”

“If that’s what it takes.”

She laughed, grabbing him by the shoulder and pulling him in for a hug. “Then I accept, along with a twenty-percent bonus on my next paycheck.”

He grumbled slightly but didn’t refuse, nor did he pull away from her embrace, even if he stubbornly refused to return it. It didn’t matter that he hadn’t technically said “sorry”. Actions spoke a hell of a lot louder than words with him, anyway, and Law was practically groveling for her to stay.

When she finally let him go, Law stood up and cleared his throat before nonchalantly strolling towards the door. “Well then, since you’re not leaving, unless the engine room is actively on fire and no one but you can put it out, you’re eating with the crew tonight. They’ll formally apologize for their behavior, and they’re all going out of their way to show you how much you’re appreciated. Ermine’s preparing your favorite meal. Clione and Shachi have put together a presentation detailing exactly how stupid they’ve been while Penguin has one extolling your virtues. Malamute and Skua have volunteered to take on your cleaning duties for the next two weeks.”

“What are you going to do?” Ikkaku teased, though he could have said “nothing” and she’d be fine—she knew he’d never make the mistake of discarding her again.

Law stopped at the door and threw his trademark cocky smirk over his shoulder. “Isn’t it obvious? I’ll be standing by your side all night to make sure you can’t run off when you realize just how obnoxiously sentimental those idiots can be.”

Ikkaku’s grin fell a bit as she realized he was right—the Hearts were an infamous band of pirates led by a fiendishly dangerous captain, but when it came to their nakama, they could get downright sappy in extreme circumstances. Jude was probably preparing some hippy-dippy song. Cousteau would inevitably name some weird sea creature after her. Seiuchi would probably find a way to scatter confetti all over the galley and she’d be picking it out of her hair for days…

Getting up, she chased after her devious captain. “I don’t suppose there’s still time for me to quit and join the Kuja, is there?”

Gold eyes glinted sadistically at her as Law replied, “Nope. Welcome to Appreciation Hell. Population: you. Don’t try to run, either—I’ll Shambles your ass into the galley if I have to.”

Ikkaku punched his arm in retaliation, though she was careful not to hit him too hard—if she annoyed him too much, he’d go out of his way to rile the guys up even more. God, he’d probably propose they all get tattoos of her face or something just to make her suffer.

“You’re an absolute bastard,” she said, affection creeping into her voice despite her best efforts.

“Yes, but a bastard that appreciates his engineer,” Law replied, and out of the corner of her eye, Ikkaku could have sworn she saw the barest hint of a genuine smile flicker across his face.

Despite the knowledge that she’d be stuck with a crew of idiots and a captain who had the emotional range of a teaspoon and a truly frightening sense of humor, Ikkaku felt happier than she had in weeks as she playfully knocked her shoulder into his. “I guess that’s not so bad, then.”

The End

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amorisabelle · 5 years ago

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Friend or Foe

INVOLVED: Levi Morgan, Melaine Ashton, Isabelle Marshall, Alexander Marshall, Calvin King, Naomi King, Victoria Perry, and Dominic Perry TIME FRAME: Saturday, December 21, 2019 LOCATION: Elk Trail Lodge; Denver, Colorado SUMMARY: When Levi arrives with Melaine, and not his wife, Maya, everyone is highly pressed and confused.

As the cab rolled up to the cabin, Levi looked around with a smirk on his face. “Oh, this is going to be great,” he told Melaine before he opened the door as the vehicle rolled to a stop. He stepped out of the cab and turned, offering his hand to Melaine to help her out.

Melaine looked to Levi, a tinge of guilt on her conscious as she nodded her head at him. Grabbing his hand, she moved out of the cab and slid her purse in the crook of her arm, her long limbs shifting as she peered at all the snow around her through her sunglasses.

Dominic picked up another piece of wood and he looked to his friend as he exited the cab with a woman that looked nothing like Maya. “Is that Levi?” he said looking to them oddly.

Alexander held an arm full of chopped wood and he responded. “Yea, but that isn’t Maya,” he said matter-of-factly.

Levi got his bags from the cabbie, pulling a hundred from his pocket and giving it to the man before the cabbie handed Melaine her bag. He looked to Melaine before he turned with his bag and began to walk towards the cabin and his friends. “Whoo!” he said loudly as he drug the large bag along. “Fellas!” he said as he spotted his boys, lifting his bag with ease now as he went into a light jog towards his friends.

As Levi came walking up Dominic began to meet him halfway, his other friends tagging along. “Brother,” he repeated back him, confusion lingering in his voice now.

Alexander tossed his arm full of wood back down on the ground before he moved over with the other guys, meeting Levi and this random mystery woman.

Meeting with his friends near the door, Levi sat his bag down. “I see y’all getting the place ready for me. Hmm?” he said only half joking with his narcissistic tendencies.

Melaine looked to the men as they all approached taking each one in, noting the one in the middle was kind of cute. Tall dark and handsome, her type. She looked to Levi at his words and smirked.

“It’s always about you, uh,” Alexander said pausing. “Levi,” he released as he looked on confused.

Calvin looked between his friend and the mystery woman standing beside him and said, “uh, hey Levi… what’s up?” his eyebrows knitting together as his eyes continued to jot between Levi and this woman.

Levi looked at his friends with a smile breaking out on his face. “I’m good!” he said joyfully.

Naomi bundled up in her floor-length mink coat and she looked to their husbands before she spotted some random woman standing next to Levi.

Stepping outside with her friends, Isabelle was excited to greet Maya, it had been quite a while since she had last seen her friend. So, when she hit the patio to see Levi standing there with another woman her face frowned up.

Victoria moved out the door with her friends, her smile quickly turning into an expression of shock as she looked over the other woman, her mouth hanging slightly.

Levi looked over with a bright smile. “Ladies!” he said as a greeting before he went on. “Hey, Isabelle. Hey, Victoria,” he paused his entire tone changing now as he said, “Naomi…” looking over to Melaine for a moment.

“Who is this?” Victoria asked, her face contorting slightly.

“I’m Melaine,” Melaine said as she spoke up for herself. “I am a friend of Levi and Maya’s,” she said as she bumped Levi slightly with her elbow.

“My fault, my fault,” Levi began. “Maya invited Melaine when she found out there was an extra bedroom,” he explained. “Y’all cool with that?”

Isabelle looked over at her husband for a moment before she looked at Levi. “Uh, yeah…” she trailed off very unsure of the entire situation. “You know, any friend of Maya’s is a friend of ours…” she said before she looked over at Victoria, “... right?” her face still flushed with confusion and disbelief.

“Uh ... Yeah…. Sure…” Victoria said still staring at Levi, her jaw still lax with shock.

“Hell no,” Naomi said looking to Levi and then his so-called friend. “She’s going to have to come with something on this trip,” she said with an attitude.

Melaine looked to Naomi and said, “of course,” with a raised brow pulling her sunglasses off her face to looked them into their eyes.

“Mhm,” Naomi said as she looked the woman up and done, taking in her golden sun-kissed skin and her hazel eyes. “She’s pretty,” she commented to her friends quietly, “and single,”

“Yeah,” Isabelle said folding her arms over her chest, co-signing her friend. “Yeah, looks that way…” she said looking to her husband once more before down at Naomi on the step in front of her.

“Yeah, get her little ass out of here,” Naomi said to the two women near her.

Looking off into the distance, Victoria tried to make it make sense. “Y’all, where is Maya?”

Looking over at Victoria, Isabelle cocked her neck to the side asking. “Levi… where is Maya?”

Levi looked up at Isabelle expectantly before he said, “Oh! I made her drive. We flew,” he said gesturing between himself and Melaine.

“You did what?” Victoria said shocked.

“Look, I wasn’t paying for another seat for her fat ass. Flight was booked up anyway,” Levi said shrugging. “Y'all know she fat as hell. Been telling her to lose weight for months…”

Alexander looked to his friend at his commented and he covered his face with his gloved hand for a moment before he slapped his forehead, shaking his head at his friend, what an ass.

“Levi are you hearing what you’re saying right now?” Victoria asked as her eyebrows knitted together and her head shook with shock and confusion. Had he lost his mind?

Isabelle dropped her head into her hand briefly. “I can’t believe…” she trailed off just shocked. She was at a loss. “Did he just say she was driving?”

“I am still on the fat as hell part,” Naomi said neck jerked as she looked to Levi with rage behind her eyes. “Have you looked at your-fucking-self lately?” she asked him, “you and your fucked-up tape up? Fake ass Gerald Levert,” she snapped looking him and the woman up and down.

Levi gave Naomi a stank eye, “you’re one to talk with your hairline pushed behind your ears. Those hair products real good, huh?” he asked her before he looked to Melaine. “Beware. Naomi, also known as the bitter one…”

Naomi smirked nodding her head, “also known as the beat-a-bitch ass one, too,” she corrected him with a knowing look sliding her hands in her pockets.

“Naomi,” Victoria said placing a hand on her friend’s shoulder before she turned her eyes to Levi once more. “Levi, are you serious? You let Maya drive up here alone?”

Cutting in, Isabelle said, “do you have any idea how long that drive is?”

Alexander decided to step in and say his peace. “Levi, come on,” he said sighing. “The weather is supposed to be bad tonight. Maybe you should call her and tell her to get a flight tomorrow,” he said reasonably.

“Look, she is fine!” Levi said starting to get slightly agitated. “Okay, now drop it.”

Isabelle immediately turned on her heels and began to walk into the cabin. “Okay, I’m going to call her. This is ridiculous.” She glanced back at Victoria as she woman walked into the cabin behind her and she muttered to her about the situation as they left.

Levi turned to Isabelle as she began to walk away and threw his hands up. “Maya is a big girl… literally,” he said before chuckling at himself. He leaned down slightly to pick up his bag and said to the guys. “She’s fine, okay?” He held his bag in his hand and turned to Melaine. “C’mon,” he said his freehand brushing across her lower back as he nodded towards the cabin and he moved to pass Naomi. “What smells good, girl? You cooking?” he asked as he moved into the cabin.

Melaine looked to Levi and didn’t say a word, staying silent before she moved to walk into the cabin with him. She grabbed her bag only for another gentlemen, Mr. tall, dark, and handsome, to grab it for her.

Naomi looked Levi up and down, he had her so sick, she thought to herself as she looked to her husband. Eyeing him wildly she shoved the girls bag out of his hand and let it fall to the ground before she said, “she can carry her own shit,” to him bitterly, turning with her husband to walk inside.

Alexander looked between Naomi and Calvin with large eyes before he picked the bag up politely. He looked to the woman to walk in front of him as they all entered the house together.

Standing at the breakfast bar, Victoria left a message on Maya’s phone. “Maya, give us a call when you get this message. We just want to know that you’re okay,” she said before pulling the phone away from her ear and hanging up. “Straight to voicemail,” she said to Naomi and Isabelle.

“A friend of hers?” Naomi said looking to the woman from afar. “How come we are just meeting her?” she asked her friends.

“Right,” Isabelle said agreeing with Naomi as she stared off into the other room as this Melaine interacted with the men.

“And if she’s such a good friend, why is she here with Levi and why didn’t she drive up here with Maya?” Victoria questioned, neck rolling slightly with an attitude. The more she thought about it the more irritated she became.

Isabelle sighed and said, “good point. That’s what we would have done…”

Victoria stared off at the woman as she flirted with their husbands and she said, “well, before we get too crazy with this, let’s find out what’s going on and make sure we don’t pass too much judgement on her,” she said rolling her neck to the side slightly. “Agreed?” she asked, still staring at the woman.

Isabelle’s face scrunched and her eyes rolled as she watched the woman giggle and kiki but yet and still she said, “agreed…” and shrugged slightly.

“No,” Naomi said shaking her head slowly, eyeing the flirtatious woman before them. She could smell a whore a mile away.

“No?” Isabelle said looking over at Naomi.

“I don’t like that trick,” Naomi said to her friends, a scowl surfacing on her face. “Good thing I’m not afraid to whoop a tricks ass,” she under her breath.

#thread #thread: friend or foe #thread with: alexander luke #thread with: victoria annalise #thread with: dominic jamal #thread with: calvin isaiah #thread with: naomi savannah #thread with: levi andre #thread with: melaine rose

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bolbianddolanhouse · 5 years ago

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BNHA self insert AU

Nani the heck is this? Read here!

Chapter 15: I’m Just Tryna Have a Good Time

Its Tuesday, T-minus 5 days until the dance and I have made up my mind on my pressing issue. Dress is 90% ready and I was feeling all my stresses leave my body.

-Stats and Strats with Jin-

“Hey, whatcha get on the quiz?” Jin asked me quietly “I didn’t do so hot.”

“I got a 90%, its passing” I responded back “and you?”

“I got an 86, thats my lowest test score in this class!” Jin harshly said “I’m losing it!”

“No you’re not” I comforted him as I took his test to compare “look here! Your responses on the short answer weren’t extensive enough and...you got one multiple choice wrong.”

“Did you get that one wrong too?” Jin took a peek at the two tests “I’ll be honest I didn’t understand that one, like what the hell is the percentage of successful cases in the country? We didn’t go over that!”

“Yeah I got it wrong too, I thought I was trippin because I swear I saw that number in a different class” I reflected back “I aint too worried about it tho.”

“You really are maxin’ and chillaxin’ huh?” Jin sighed as he took back his quiz “I’ll go talk to sensei about it then.”

Class ended a bit early and I had no after school duties, so I had extra down time to get my dress finished and fill out my internship paperwork. I teleport to the dorms and see the boys practicing their slow dancing in the commons room.

“Um am I interrupting something?” I tried to suppress my laughter “what am I looking at here?”

“AH! Palma-san!” yelped Kirishima “we were just practicing our slow dancing, since we all have dates.”

“well...everyone but Koda, Iida and Mineta” Ojiro sliding in with the facts “but Koda isn’t going, Mineta is gross and Iida is having trouble asking a certain someone.”

“Oof I heard about his trouble asking” I bluntly stated “I heard they’re hard to get a hold of but they seem to be close from the way he speaks about them, hope they meet soon.”

The boys looked at each other and exchanged looks of confusion. “So like, who do you wish would ask you to the dance?” asked Sato.

“I don’t really care, maybe somebody I know? I don’t have eyes for anybody” I thought out loud as I took off my shoes “I just want to look and feel pretty while having fun! Having a date is optional in my agenda.”

I walk to my room and the boys murmur when I closed my door. I didn’t leave my room until everyone was in their rooms so I could have a quiet dinner. My dinner in the dark was disrupted by Iida turning on the lights, thinking I was the food thief that’s been eating other’s lunches and leftovers for the past 3 months.

“Oh its you!” Iida said relieved “I know you aren’t the food thief.”

“hahaha nah, I’m just having my dinner” I giggled “time flies when you’re putting finishing touches on your dress.”

“It’s near completion? That’s great to hear!” he congratulated me “how’s your offer choosing going?”

“I decided to go with Best Jeanist”

“WOW! with the number 4 hero!” He exclaimed as he pulled me in for a hug “I’m so proud of you for getting such an offer! He’s an amazing person, Bakugo interned under him and turned out better than ever!”

I was taken by surprise with the hug, he was squeezing me but not like he used to. It was much more gentle and I wasn’t lifted up, face smashed against his chest. I took in his scent and it was pleasant and not too strong, I put my arms around him forgetting that I was in the kitchen. If I didn’t snap out of my little daze, I honest to God would’ve kissed him and ruin everything.

“Thank you Tenya” I said breaking off the hug “glad that you’re happy with my choice.”

“Why?”

“It’s just that my classmates were giving me flack on turning down alot of agencies that they wanted to get offers from” I said turning back to my plate of food “but all I said to them was ‘get gud’ because it’s MY choice and I know what the heck is up.”

“That is true” he said yawning “well I’m going to bed, good night Ita”

“Good night!” I say with a forkful of sliced beets. I thought to myself as he walked away wow what is wrong with me? Thats the 3rd time I’ve been tempted to kiss him but I know better! He’s just being nice and its just my stupid feelings getting twisted when I get any sort of attention from boys.

-Next day, leaving the nurses office-

“Oof that exam took longer than I thought Muffin 2.0″

“Yes! it took up all of class time and 5 minutes of lunch”

“Wow really?!” I exclaimed as I turned the corner to head to the intel wing “so much for catching the last half of hero class.”

I walk down the hallway where classroom 1-A is and see Iida walk out.

“Oh hi Tenya!”

Iida looks up to see me and the robo-dog.

“Ita! You’re ok!” He said running toward me.

“Yea hehe, I was due for my well-being check up and it took up all of class time.”

“Oh I see...did everything go well?”

“Yes, I am in better shape than 2 months ago thats for-” I started then got disrupted by my phone, it was a text from Mimi.

[WE HAVE A SITUATION IN THE SITUATION ROOM! CODE GREEN!]

My face turns pale and I didn’t hear what Iida was saying.

“...so if you’re already going, it would be my-”

“hmm? Oh sorry to cut you short but I’m needed at the situation room” I said as I started running down the hall and turned back to follow up “um if you aren’t busy later we can finish up!” Before Iida could say anything I bolt out of sight with the robo-dog. I get to the situation room (its just our commons room where we cook and eat) and see a bunch of students freaking out over the rice cooker that was on fire! I didn’t know what to do and I spotted Mimi and Jin screaming at Diya sensei in the corner, huddled and rocking himself.

“I have contacted All Might!” screamed Hansai “HELP IS ON THE WAY! I REPEAT, HELP IS ON THE WAY!”

“What the hell is All Might going to do?!” I yelled at Hansai “flex out the fire?! fuckin DETROIT SMASH our rice cooker and call it justice?!”

“You know what, I didn’t think that call all the way through” Hansai reflected on his choices “oh boy, press F for our soon to be deceased rice cooker.”

Our door bust open with All Might crashing in “do not worry agents! I AM HERE!”

We all point and scream at the rice cooker and All Might looked like he was questioning his life choice on becoming a teacher as he stared at the comically unfortunate fire. He takes his hand and just smothers out the fire, we just explode with how anti-climatic it was to have the number 1 hero to just lightly pat the fire out.

“Thank you All Might, and your yaoi hands!” spoke up Jin.

“Jin you can’t just say that to a hero!” I said face palming at that comment.

All Might looks at his hands, realizes Jin is right and just walks out without saying anything.

“SEE! Now he’s insecure!” scolded Yuka “how the hell do you just make the number one hero insecure?!”

We never let Jin live that down. Our day went about normally and I went to the dorms to see if I could finish that conversation with Iida. He was busy and I felt sort of bad that I just brushed him off like that. I really wanted to know what he wanted to tell me. It bothered me into the next day, and the day after that, and the day after that. Its day of the dance now and I was going to have fun! Ain’t nothing going to ruin this for me! I made the last stitch on my dress 2 hours before I was supposed to get ready and she was perfect! I get started on my hair and makeup when I get knocks on my door, what now?

“Who is it?”

“its the girls! we have an emergency!”

“Oh no! come in!”

The girls burst in and Mina melted part of her bottom hem, Uraraka went too heavy handed on the eyeliner and Asui’s curls didn’t come out right. With some teamwork and cooperation from Momo, I got some matching trim to sew on the hem to hide the blunder. I had Uraraka wipe off her makeup while I brushed out Asui’s hair to redo the curls. I redid the makeup while the hot curlers were working on Asui. When everything got fixed and they went on there way back to their rooms, I saw that I had less than an hour to get ready! I really pushed my luck to finish but I was still the last one to get ready. All my panic left my head when I put on my faux mink coat, I took one good look in the mirror, I felt so pretty and looked gorgeous. I spritz on some perfume and grabbed my clutch to feel my fantasy before walking out.

“Ah! sorry I took so long!” I said briskly walking to the commons room to meet the girls “had to perfect my makeup and lost track of time.”

“PALMA-SAN YOU LOOK LIKE A PRINCESS!” squealed the girls over my final look. “The bouffant updo really makes for the princess look!” admired Momo.

I blush and we took our photo and some selfies before heading out.

“Ok we should go now! We had our dates wait long enough downstairs” said Uraraka walking to the stairs “Are you coming with us Palma-san?”

“Oh uh I was just going to teleport there” I played it cool like I wasn’t a little envious that I was going dateless “see yall on the dance floor!” They leave and I see them walk arm in arm with their dates. I text Mimi and Jin that I am making my way over soon, as I’m typing all that out, I hear someone from the boys side close their room and walk to the commons room. In walks Iida, wearing a dark grey suit with a lavender colored dress shirt and gold bowtie, he had a small white box in his hands. I looked at him and stopped typing, he looked so handsome and a bitch might get wild and hold his hand. He stared back at me as he couldn’t believe his eyes either.

“Wow Ita” he broke the silence and walked toward me “you look so stunning!” He got my hands in his “I can’t believe you made this dress yourself! The result was well worth the effort, so beautiful.”

I turn red “you don’t look bad yourself!” I look at the box he set on the table “is that for your date OH that reminds me! Who is your date anyways?”

Iida looks at the box then at me with embarrassment “Yes and um, you see, well...” He let go of my hands to pick up the box “I’m not good at these things but um I was trying to ask you to be my date to the dance. And I had so many opportunities that we were alone together for me to ask but...the words couldn’t come out and I got nervous every time.”

“Oh Tenya” I said now realizing that I was the elusive certain someone “how could I not put 2 and 2 together that you were trying to ask me! Sorry I’m such a mess!”

“No no no! I was being a coward!” he shifted blame on himself “so... if it’s not too late, Itati, will you be my date to the dance?” he said as he put his hand out to me, shaking.

I giggle and put my hand in his “I’d love to go with you Tenya.” He looked at me surprised that I said yes at all. He smiled and kissed my hand. I open my purse to reveal a boutonniere I made with a fresh white rose, baby’s breath and white sage with a gold ribbon. “I made this in case I got asked last minute at the dance, but since you asked me here, this is yours.” He leaned in for me to pin it on his coat pocket.

“I got your flowers too” he said as I lifted my arm eagerly to get the corsage “hmm? why are you- oooooh, it goes on your arm” he said like he fucked something up.

“Whats in the box then?” I asked suspiciously, now that I looked at the box, it was more like a cake box than a corsage box.

“Ok so funny thing... I was under the impression that the flowers you give to your date is supposed to go on your neck or something and-”

“So what is in the box Tenya?”

“It’s flowers, but” he said as he opened the box to reveal a half circle of white roses with violets and sprigs of lavender with a gold ribbon on the ends “it looks like this! hehehe please don’t get mad.”

“I love it! it’s like a flower crown!” I cried out as I stuck my head out for him to put it on my head. He carefully puts it on my head and I get giddy “how do I look?”

“Like a princess, shall we get going, your majesty?” he said breathlessly as he stuck out his arm to me.

“Yes lets but lets teleport there!” I said as I sent the text I meant to text earlier to Mimi and Jin “um it gets a bit, awkward so um close your eyes!”

“Oh ok” he complied “so now what-” I stopped his sentence as I got his arm to shove into my cleavage, as it gets tricky to teleport things when I wear certain bras that hide my sternum. When he opened his eyes, I had already teleported us to the place but he also caught glimpse of where his hand was before I dropped his hand.

“Oh look we’re here! hehe HEY ITS MY FRIENDS! See you inside!” I tried to play it cool as I T-posed to Mimi and Jin.

“Ita! you look like Princess Diana!” fawned Mimi.

“And you two look like 90′s prom king and queen yourselves!” I complimented back.

We walk in and see that it wasn’t poppin yet, Jin and I took care of that as we dished out some hot dance moves as Mimi gassed us up. Everyone else joined in soon after they saw Jin praising the Lord, thats when I dipped out to find Iida. I saw All Might, Aizawa in his sleeping bag, Nezu, Vlad and Midnight chaperoning the dance. Midnight saw me and called me over with Iida

“Aww look at you two! Let me take your picture” she said as she took out her phone to take the picture. We pose ourselves facing inwards with his arms on my shoulders and mine on his waist. She takes a few pictures and sends them to me. As I was about to get some water from the refreshment table, Midnight came up to me and whispered in my ear “do you need condoms? I got some if you’re not heading back to your dorm right away.”

I gasp “what- no! I’m not- not with him!”

Midnight opens her purse and put 3 in my hand “Here, just in case. Have fun! Be safe” she said as she winked and walked away.

I ran to my purse to put them away before anybody saw me. I danced to more songs and saw that Iida was just sitting at a table by himself, not really having fun. They announced the slow dance and I teleported over to Iida.

“Hey, shall I take this dance?” I asked with my hand out

He laughed a bit “Aren’t I supposed to ask you that?” as he put his hand in mine.

“Who cares!” I cried out as I lead him to the dance floor “We’re just trying to have fun!”

The slow dance was to Love on the Brain by Rihanna, I put my hand on his shoulder and the other holding his hand. We start moving but clumsily, I noticed that his other hand was pointed outward like he didn’t know where to put it on my body and was too afraid to guess.

“Oh Tenya hehehe your other hand goes on my waist.”

“Right! ok” he complied and got in the groove of my movement. We were locking eyes at some point, I think damn am I really gonna go for it and ruin our friendship? Boy is giving me those love me tender eyes. Meanwhile, Iida was thinking Okay Tenya, you’re in position to kiss her DONT MESS IT UP DONT MESS IT UP! Oh god she’s giving me those concerned eyes, I’m losing her attention! My gaze shifted to Kirishima and Bakugo, kissing on the dance floor.

“Look! I knew they had a thing going on.” I whispered to Iida to look where I was looking.

He looked and cleared his throat “urm um, should- should we be doing that too?” he asked nervously with sweat beading up on his forehead.

“I mean if you want to” I said calmly “I won’t force you to do it.”

“Ok then, here I go” he whispered as he brought me closer. My mind went crazy holy shit he’s really out here, giving into peer pressure...why is he shaking? oh jeez thats alot of sweat, dude chill! I was about 2 inches away from his sweaty face when I heard the 1st word of Crank Dat by Soulja Boy.

“OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS SONG!” I yelled as I broke away from Iida, realizing I kinda fucked up I turned back and said “uh rain check on that kiss?”

Iida sighed in relief “Yeah! um you go ahead and dance and I’ll just go...over there.” He briskly ran into the bathroom and wiped down his face and hands that were damp with nervous sweat. He looked at himself in the mirror “What a mess of a man I am! I couldn’t even kiss her with consent! Maybe she doesn’t like me back and I’m just wasting my time because I’m not cool enough to be a love interest.” He washed his hands and shot himself down with all the reasons Ita doesn’t see him as a love interest before leaving the bathroom. Tokoyami steps out of his stall, then followed Kirishima and Bakugo out of the big stall, and lastly Tetsutsu in the stall far from the others.

“Wow that was so sad” said Tetsutsu “who was he talking about?”

“Our classmate Palma-san, the agent” responded Tokoyami “he’s been trying to confess to her for months and he barely asked her to the dance literally 10 mins before the dance.”

“Oh the girl with curly hair and speaks spanish?” Tetsutsu realized “he’s not the only one, my buddy Shinso and classmate Monoma have a thing for her too. Don’t blame them! She’s talented and can kick anybody’s ass.”

“Are you serious?! Two more people are after her heart?” Kirishima perked up “Iida-kun needs to seriously seal the deal with her. They’re meant for each other~”

The other boys look at Kirishima like he’s delusional. Back at the dance, there’s a full blown whipping circle of 20 people. The dance ends like 20 mins before curfew and I wasn’t ready for anything to end yet.

“That was fun but this after party is gonna pop!” I holler with Mimi and Jin as Iida walked beside me.

“What’s an after party?” curiously asked Iida.

“Its someplace people go after an event just to hang out or party some more until the sun rises.” I explained “all the cool kids are going to the Intel 3rd years’ after party in their dorm! Super exclusive, invite only thing that we and a plus one got invited to.”

“Well, I’m a plus one” slyly said Iida “Can I go?”

“Can you handle being awake for that long?” I asked concerned “I wouldn’t want to ruin your regime.”

“HA! I can handle it! I can be cool” he said flexing his arms “the night is still young isn’t it?!”

Jin looks at his watch “Its like 8pm, the after party starts at 10pm, so yes the night is very young.”

“Well what are we waiting for sukas!” Mimi said striking a pose “portal us to the nearest convenience store baby boy!”

Jin summons a portal and drag Iida into it and we walk into said store and bought a variety of snacks and juice. We walk out and spot Mirio and his friends

“Oh jeez its them!” I said trying to lower my voice “Jin summon portal before naked man spots me!”

“aw fuck ok!” Jin said rushing a portal “this portal may or may not lead us 4 feet above the living room.”

We run in and pile on the intel 1-A living room. We laugh it off and Iida witnessed us pre-gaming on half a bottle of white wine while preparing the snacks we were going to give.

“I didn’t know you were a drinker Ita” observed Iida “I could understand your friends being drinkers but not you.”

“There’s alot of things you don’t know about me Tenya” I said before downing my last glup of wine in my red cup “I’ve been drinking for a while but mostly just at these parties with the right kind of company.”

“Would you like a sip of wine?” Jin offered Iida “there’s enough for another quarter cup if you’re game.”

“No thank you” Iida declined politely “I won’t touch the stuff until I’m of legal drinking age.”

“Oh man good on you!” I said feeling the wine take its affect “I couldn’t wait that long so when my crush offered me some sour vodka during band camp, suddenly BOOM I became a one of the cool kids.”

I told one of my band camp stories to bide the time before heading to the after party. We take the elevator to their floor and we enter when things were getting interesting. It was basically a dorm themed club with live DJ set, bar and lounge areas. I get a drink and chat with some of the upperclassmen that took the practice test with us while Mimi was tryin to get lucky. I spot Iida looking around and feeling a bit out of place, I walk over to him

“Hey, you feeling ok?”

“Yea its just that I don’t really know these people aside from you.”

“Well, I guess then I should stick by you” I said with all the liquid courage running through my body “but first, I gotta get another drink.”

“Please allow me!” he said taking my cup “you just save me a seat over here and I’ll refill your cup.”

“Whatever you say Tenya” I said throwing myself on the lounge chair to save his seat.

He walks up to the bar “Um hi, I’d like to refill whatever the girl in the flower crown was drinking.”

“Sure thing dude” said the 3rd year as he mixed up the drink and served it with super speed “also would you give her this, and tell her to call me sometime” as he slid a champagne glass of a sparkly pink drink with a number written on a sticky note.

Iida takes the two drinks “thank you, I’ll let her know” knowing damn well that he’s not going to because she’s his date, not this 3rd year. He walks over to her and gives her the champagne glass, sans sticky note.

“Whats this?”

“They were out of something so I said to give me a drink that a pretty lady like yourself would drink and they gave me this.”

I was too tipsy to pick up on the smooth talking “Oh si? Spot on hehehe”

“Yea and I got an alcohol too, just trying new things tonight.”

“Cheers! I’ll drink to that” I said clinking my drink to his “to new things!”

He takes a sip and almost spits it back into the cup. It was sour and strong with a weird texture. He looks into the cup and sees its this pink drink with gummy worms in it, turns out its 2 parts sour apple vodka, 1 part watermelon juice, splash of Bacardi and sour gummy worms to taste. Iida was about to get his shit rocked as he downed the drink to look cool and proceeded to dance like never before on the dance floor. Ita joined him on the floor just to make him feel more comfortable. Every time a boy got a bit too close to her, Iida swatted them away with his chops to let them know she was off limits.

“Wow Tenya! Nice moves!” I gas him up “Now you’re having fun!”

A bit later, when I was drinking some water to cool down and sober up for more drinking, Iida gets sloppy on me.

“Hey! Pretty lady...you’re pretty”

“Oh man Tenya, drink some water”

“nah nah! I’m good! I just wanna...uhh tell you somethin”

“Oh si? Like what?”

“Like, hehehehe you make my brain go stupid and I wanna kiss you”

“You’re drunk, thats just the liquor talking!”

“No...I mean it, I want to kiss you. I’m gonna kiss you right now!” he said as he leaned in, over puckering his lips. Before he could, I saw him gag a little and I knew that he was going to throw up.

“No kissing! You need to go to the bathroom!”

“I don’t need to go potty! I’m a big boy!” he mumbled as I drag him to the bathroom so he can puke. Lucky for us, the bathroom I chose was empty. I unbutton and loosen his bowtie “You wanna see my muscles?”

“No, I want you to throw up before you embarrass yourself.”

He looks at the toilet and gags again until he gave in and threw up. I rubbed his back and told him it was alright to let it all out. After 5 mins of on and off vomiting, he stood up and started crying.

“You hate me! don’t you?! I ruined your night!”

“No you didn’t! I had a great night.”

“Not that!” he said in between sobs “what kind of man doesn’t kiss their date? I’ve been wanting to kiss you and give you what you want, I know you like kissing and dancing, so whats wrong with me!”

“There’s nothing wrong with you Tenya! I just think I’m just not the best 1st choice” I explained myself half tipsy still, wiping the vomit off his face with a wet paper towel “I drink, lie, fight dirty, swear like a man and kiss strangers...not exactly first choice or worth the trouble for somebody worth more.”

“S-s-shut up Ita! You’re like, the most amazing girl in my eyes, I want you to be my love! I love you!” he said slumping himself onto me “there, I said it! Don’t be mad.”

I sigh tiredly as I know it’s just the booze talking and I shouldn’t take his word seriously “Come on big guy, lets get you to bed.”

“Will you sing me a lullaby?”

“If you behave”

“And tuck me in”

“Of course!”

“And tell me goodnight?”

“Yes Tenya”

I take him back to the party to give him water and some chips and orange slices to eat to mask the taste of vomit when he wakes up in the morning. I say my goodbyes and I teleport him to his room. I stumble a bit, as I am still a bit drunk and helping a drunk to bed. I take off his shoes, coat, bowtie and glasses so he can lay comfortably in bed. He lays down and almost instantly falls asleep, I tuck him in and I get sleepy just looking at him. I check the time, its 2am, gently kissed him on the forehead and decide to lay down next to him. Because I know these beds can hold 2 people. I take off my shoes, coat, flower crown and bra to lay down next to him. As I drifted to sleep, I secretly wished that he said all those nice things about me when he’s sober. And that he’d kissed me as he held me close. My eyelids felt heavy and I closed my eyes on one of the amazing nights of my life.

“Goodnight Tenya” I whispered “don’t freak out in the morning.”

-End Chapter 15-

#bnha #mha #not canon #self insert au #chapter 15 #will update regularly #ask me anything #i wish i could draw the dance scene #can you tell Iida is my fave lmao

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alvertesongdiary · 6 years ago

Video

youtube

Lil Uzi Vert - New Patek

Hmm New Patek on my wrist, white diamonds them shits hit pink Ight I'm ready

New Patek on my wrist (gang) White diamonds them shits hit pink (gang, gang) Got cold, had to go get a mink (gang) New finger ring sit like a sink (gang, gang) You a bad bitch, then we can link (what?) Hit the shower, you might stink (gang, gang) Bitches bad, yeah, they on my grape (uh) And she said "Lil Uzi so great" (uh, uh) How you deal with all that hate? (uh-uh) Shut up, bitch, don't give me migraine New Patek on my wrist White diamonds them shits hit pink Got cold, had to go get a mink New finger ring sit like a sink You a bad bitch, then we can link Hit the shower, you might stink Bitches bad, yeah, they on my grape (uh-uh) And she said "Lil Uzi so great"

Ok, your girlfriend like my drip (drip, uh) Happy birthday to that bitch (bitch) Yeah, the one that suck my dick (dick, uh) Triple S got that extra grip (grip) So you know I cannot slip That jeweler made part of my wrist (wrist) Franck Muller made part of my wrist (wrist) Franck Muller made part of my wrist (wrist) My shooters gon' shoot, can't miss My shooter got 30 on his hip Yeah I need my fix Was that a pair of boots from Rick? Had to tell that lil girl don't trip Cool blood, but my money crip Got clap on lights no flick Can't take no pic, no flick (no cap) Fuck that bitch in my new whip (skrr) Her ass so fat can't fit Her ass so fat it's amazing (amazing) Her ass so fat it's a miracle (miracle) Her last man money hysterical She from the six one nine, Rey Mysterio I'm the same nigga bustin' their stereo Yeah, My boys on the block selling O's, no cheerios I don't wake up in the morning for cereal Flip the brick make the whole shit do a aerial Bang the shit out and make the hoes sing Ariel Silencers so they really can not hear me though Killing these beats Lil Uzi a serial Clean up the body prepare for the burial Burberry pants I got Burberry tennis shoes I got the swag probably, I'ma finish you I am a octopus I cannot breath without water So I put diamonds on my tentacles How is you stoppin' us, they is not toppin' us You know I had to cop that shit just by the twos Blood in my chakra, I will not pop at ya Put money on my head just for your album bruh Tell me lil boy if it's beef I get to choppin' shit up like it's prime and treat you like you Optimus My chain white gold your shit look like copper bruh MCM yeah that shit made of ostrich bruh But I don't wear that, give that to my hoes Yeah I swear that lil nigga my clone I had to do this shit all on my own Yeah, slime shit lil baby, put diamonds in my nose

And your girlfriend like my drip (drip, uh) Happy birthday to that bitch (bitch) Yeah, the one that suck my dick (dick, uh) Triple S got that extra grip (grip) So you know I cannot slip

Franck Muller made part of my wrist Franck Muller made part of my wrist New Rollie made a part of my wrist AP made part of my wrist New Richard on my wrist Got a millie down sellin' my bank

Throw up gang signs, Naruto Put metal in my nose like Pain Man, I never saw this bitch before How the fuck she know my name She said "Lil Uzi, Hello" I looked at her, "Oh, hey" (Hello?) You ain't never seen pastry dough, well lil bitch I got cake Gettin' money, I'm the man Gettin' money had to count the advance Saint Laurent all on my shoes they not Vans Need a fan, in case a nigga get hot Remember she ain't want me back, I was popped On the block back before I had locks Red dot for a chicken eat pop MC told the bitch give me cop Motorcycle days, bitch young jock That's what I call her, she all on my top Rapstar or do he sell rock? He got files so he beatin' the trial Couple racks let them niggas run wild Super filthy man they livin' so foul I got some real niggas that is locked up Tryna shade the bar just for the foul All my bitches want me to take a foul Live off verbs, and I live off of nouns He get money, then I had to say how? New rug, and it's made of wolf New rabbit yeah I use as a towel Lil bitch, yeah I run through the city Different spots in it just like a cow Yeah, I'm talkin' 'bout a mansion, no house Yeah, my closet yeah that shit got a house Four years, I ain't even see a mouse Please stop talking bitch put dick in your mouth We get money, what the fuck is a drought Makin' rain 'cause I'm up in the clouds Had to tell that lil bitch get from around 'Cause that little bitch be fuckin' with clowns

Let's go, let's go, had to tell that lil bitch, yeah let's go Yeah, that lil nigga stole my swag, and he's tryna steal my flow I had to switch it up one time just like I switch my phone I could try one more time, I can give this shit one more go I put hundreds in my safe (ayy) I throw twenties in her face I put the M in a J (ayy) I got a bae in the bay (ayy) I fucked on that nigga little bitch that's the reason he tryna' say that I'm gay (ayy) Way more coochie the kid slay (ayy) I sell a mil in a day (ayy) All of my bitches they grade A I do not get it in Canada, but when I'm in Toronto they treat me like Drake This a light jet, this a flight day Had that lil bitch that's on Myspace I can feel this shit in my veins Look at my neck thats an ice tray Come on tell me, what you sayin' (what you sayin', what you sayin', what you sayin')

And your girlfriend like my drip (drip, uh) Happy birthday to that bitch (bitch) Yeah, the one that suck my dick (dick, uh) Triple S got that extra grip (grip) (Oh yeah)

Franck Muller made part of my wrist Franck Muller made part of my wrist New Rollie made part of my wrist AP made a part of my wrist New Richard on my wrist Got a millie down sellin' my bank

New Patek on my wrist White diamonds them shits hit pink Got cold, had to go get a mink New finger ring sit like a sink You a bad bitch, then we can link (what?) Hit the shower, you might stink Bitches bad, yeah, they on my grape (uh) And she said "Lil Uzi so great" (uh, uh) How you deal with all that hate? (uh-uh) Shut up, bitch, don't give me migraine

Throw up gang signs, Naruto Put metal in my nose like Pain Man, I never saw this bitch before How the fuck she know my name She said "Lil Uzi, Hello" I looked at her, "Oh, hey" You ain't never seen pastry dough, well lil bitch I got cake (ayy) Gettin' money, I'm the man Gettin' money had to count the advance Saint Laurent all on my shoes they not Vans Need a fan, in case a nigga get hot Remember she ain't want me back, I was popped On the block back before I had locks Red dot for a chicken eat pop MC told the bitch

Yeah, that's it

28/09/2018

#lil uzi vert #new patek #music #trap #musica #cancion del dia #song of the day #youtube #diario #diary

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mink-shit-shrine · 1 year ago

Text

#dmmd #dmmd memes #dramatical murder #mink shit shrine #dmmd mink #mink #nitro chiral #sandy weeds #visual novel #uh oh bitch you just got minked #school days #anime #anime manga #anime memes

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philocalygray · 7 years ago

Text

Lyric Challenge!!:)

Rules: Write the first ten songs that come up on shuffle (no skipping) and quote your favourite lyrics from them.

I was tagged by: @mintdolans @effervescentethan @dolanoodle @hexagonalspud & @lanadeldolans love you babess♥♥

****THE SEPARATION OF LYRICS MEANS THEY ARE DIFFERENT SECTIONS IN THE SONGS, NOT ALL IN ONE GO****

1. “Like I Do” - David Guetta, Martin Garrix, Brooks

Baby, I think of you When I'm all alone and it's half past two Bet you think about it too Ain't nobody love you like I do (like I do) Baby, I think of you When I'm all alone and it's half past two Bet you think about it too Ain't nobody love you like I do Like I do

2. “Gyalchester” - Drake (EXPLICIT)

Hermès link, ice-blue mink Tat on my ribs like I do not know what permanent is They want me gone, wait for the kicker Bury me now and I only get bigger That's word to my n*gga

Me and my broski are twins, but we don't look alike I don't take naps What's that? Facts?

3. “Bartier Cardi” - Cardi B, ft. 21 Savage (EXPLICIT)

Your b*tch wanna party with Cardi Cartier Bardi in a 'Rari (21) Diamonds all over my body (Cardi) Shinin' all over my body (my body) Cardi got your b*tch on molly Bitch, you ain't gang, you lame Bentley truck lane to lane, blow out the brain (21) I go insane, insane I drop a check on the chain, f*ck up a check in the Flame Cardi took your man, you upset, uh Cardi got rich, they upset, yeah (from what?) Cardi put the p*ssy on Offset (say what?) Cartier, Cardi B brain on Offset (21)

Them diamonds gon' hit like a b*tch on a b*tchy ass b*tch B*tch, you a wannabe Cardi Red bottom MJ, moonwalk on a b*tch Moonwalkin' through your clique I'm moonwalkin' in the 6 Sticky with the kick, moonrocks in this b*tch I'm from the motherf*ckin' Bronx (Bronx)

4. “Tidal Wave” - Sub Focus, Alpines

You can't just give it away Like it means nothing Love isn't this game where You win something I'm tired of being on the outside I wanna know what it's like I'm tired of seeing all the sights I wanna feel us collide Your love washes over like a tidal wave I feel the impact as we collide Your love washes over like a tidal wave I feel the impact as we collide

5. “No Tears Left To Cry” - Ariana Grande

Right now, I'm in a state of mind I wanna be in, like, all the time Ain't got no tears left to cry So I'm pickin' it up, pickin' it up I'm lovin', I'm livin', I'm pickin' it up

Ain't got no tears in my body I ran out, but boy, I like it, I like it, I like it Don't matter how, what, when, who tries it We're out here vibin', we vibin', we vibin'

And if you don't know then now you know it, babe Know it, babe, yeah

Oh, I just want you to come with me We on another mentality

6. “Thinking About It (Let It Go) - KVR Remix” - Nathan Goshen, KVR

What did you do this for? Settle down for a little bit You look like any other fool i know Why would you say it like that? Don't you know dreams really come true When you give away your heart like that? So in the meantime I'm thinking about it Let it go, let it go It will all fix itself I'm thinking about it

There's a really good thing right in front of my eyes Right in front of my eyes

7. “Let Em’ Know” - Bryson Tiller (EXPLICIT)

Right now You are now tuned in Pen Griffey I'm still going in “Who is he?” Mothaf*cka’ I’m him (Yeah, let’s get it) I'm comin' back for good So let them n*ggas know it's mine “I already got someone” is what you tell 'em every time That sh*t ain't up for grabs Where you at on the map? I come to where you at F*ck around and end up your last I won't hold back, yeah I won't hold back, this time I won't hold back, I won't hold back

Him bein' Tiller, he a solid young n*gga He been real ever since I know you been tense I know we ain't had a conversation in a minute

8. “Hard 2 Face Reality” - Poo Bear, Justin Bieber, Jay Electronica

Sometimes it's hard to face reality, oh, oh Even though you might get mad at me, oh, oh

Should've been adjusted to my life Had the opportunity to stay away for the last time Now you're standin' right in front of me It hurts me to know that I lied Tryna protect your feelings You read in between the lines

Don't be afraid to stand alone Don't be afraid to stand outside your comfort zone I know it's hard away from home And it ain't easy all alone Relationships over the phone Talkin' to your significant other all night long

Love and death are quite similar How they come and go like cat burglars Reality is kinda hard to face

One day, you could be the king of pop And the next one just be "Wacko" Michael

Know it hurts to see the truth in your face Circumstances bring you down to your knees Go on and cry an ocean, but don't drown in it Enough to put your heart at ease Oh, don't lose your self-esteem I apologize, for being a man It's way harder than what it seems

9. “It’s Lit” - KYLE, ft. Iamsu! (EXPLICIT)

Well it's pretty much illuminated Ain't it, you n*ggas hate it Why you tryna act like you don't f*ck with King Wavy Why you tryna act like you don't think that I'm amazing Super Duper Kyle but I never do the saving Curly haired girls go ahead go crazy Had AP English so the flow is never basic Every time you see my face, just know you n*ggas have to face it (That sucks) Please tell your girlfriends and cameras to back up I make hits to back to back to back up Super Duper Kyle is really good rapper Shoot like the n*gga name Kyle on the Raptors Rappers worst nightmare ever since Napster You ain't really gonna hit it if you gotta ask em' That's why I don't need to ask em' Cuz I already know the answer It's lit, It's lit It's it's it's lit It's lit, It's lit Iiiiit's Lit!

Linked up with Kyle, it's lit just like Bic Watch how this game get flipped like sidekicks

10. “R.I.C.O.” - Meek Mill, ft. Drake (EXPLICIT)

To the people that think that I owe you sh*t Payback's a b*tch and you know that sh*t Y'all n*ggas gettin' too old for this

We might just get hit with the R.I.C.O Everyone home for the summer, so let's not do nothing illegal

Madonna’s a ting I know and I’m the king of pop I’m building Never-Never Land How he hate me when I never met the man Woo! We might just get hit with the R.I.C.O

It's the Chasers, what you thought?

I'm back on that hood sh*t, yeah that wish you would sh*t I'm talking that cross you that fade you fourth quarter Like Jordan, we back on that bullsh*t We came up from nothing We started on list's most wanted but now it's the Forbes list Shhh, listen, you hear that?

I tag: @spiffydolan @tidsoptlmist @jollydolans @dimply-dolan @obsidiandolans @heartfullofgrethan @latinodolan @dolandreaminn @succulentpancakes @thefancave @grethanss & anyone who wants to do it:)

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hari-writes · 7 years ago

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Little Louis Dupain-Cheng - Chapter 7

Fandom: Miraculous Ladybug Pairings: Adrien/Marinette Summary: In the seven years since Hawk Moth’s defeat, much has changed. Adrien Agreste PhD returns to Paris and is reunited with his friends. Marinette has a degree in Fashion Design, a thriving boutique and a son, six-year-old Louis. Louis is like his mother in many ways, except for green eyes and a familiar smile… Will Adrien do the maths?

Read on A03 ★★★ Buy me a coffee?

Mon coeur aime Adrien

Adrien was just getting his head around the fact that Alya had been a miraculous holder when he arrived at her and Nino’s place, only to find Chloe waiting at the door. At least that explained why she knew about his and Marinette’s identities.

“Trixx.” A glass was held aloft.

“Pollen.” Another joined it.

“Wayzz.” A third glass.

“Tikki.” Marinette added hers.

“Erm, uh, Plagg?” Adrien added, lifting his glass to the others.

Alya, Chloe, Nino, Marinette and Adrien clinked their glasses together and drank deeply.

Marinette had arrived last. She was reading Louis a bedtime story before she left her house and, apparently, he’d chosen a particularly long one. Adrien chuckled at that, he used to do the same thing with his mother. She was perched on the arm of the sofa next to him and, now, she squeezed his hand. Her look was pure concern.

“Is this ok?” She asked.

“I guess so?” He replied. “To be honest, there’s so much to take in that I’m not sure how I feel yet. “

“You know we always included Plagg in our toasts? Even when you weren’t here.” Marinette said.

“She’s not kidding, dude. We had to have a plate with some Camembert on it at the table every time we met. It stunk the place out, but Mari claims it was a perfect tribute.” Nino shook his head.

Adrien grinned at the memory. “He would have loved it.”

In the weeks following Hawk Moth’s defeat, Marinette had noticed her friends showing signs of stress. The same sort of stress she was feeling. She recognised her emotional turmoil reflected in Alya, Nino and Chloe. She already knew who wore the fox miraculous, and now that she knew Chat Noir’s identity, it wasn’t difficult to figure out who he’d trust enough to wear the turtle bracelet. A visit to Master Fu revealed Queen Bee.

Marinette asked Fu if it was safe for her to know the citizens behind the superheroes. She explained that she strongly suspected that her friends were suffering from the same post-traumatic stress that she was and wanted to support them through it. She started the OT5 (-1) gatherings as a form of talking therapy.

“It worked,” Chloe admitted. “Knowing we weren’t alone through it all.”

“And it gave us an outlet. We could shout and cry, or bitch and laugh and it was okay. It brought us through the hardest times.” Alya explained.

“And now?” Adrien asked.

“Mostly, we toast our kwamis, then eat Alya’s world-famous Jambalaya while watching reruns of Le Bachelor,” Nino admitted.

“Hey, don’t judge us!” Marinette laughed, seeing Adrien’s amused expression. “It’s still a sort of therapy.”

»»★««

“Thank you.” Adrien squeezed Marinette’s hand as they left Nino and Alya’s apartment building.

“What for?” Marinette looked at him, her blue eyes searching his face.

“For keeping everyone together when it all ended, for arranging group therapy sessions for the others.” He said, waving his hand in the general direction of the apartment. “You kept on being Ladybug, even after you gave your miraculous back.”

She smiled sadly. He knew the aching gap in his life left when he said goodbye to Plagg and knew the feeling of constantly missing his kwami. He had weekly visits to an expensive psychiatrist to help him deal with the loss. Now, he wanted to take away the grief she felt, help her the way she helped the others.

“The nightmares are back?” He asked, already knowing the answer. “Louis told me.”

Marinette snorted through her nose, “What else did he tell you?”

“Don’t be upset with him, he was only interested in the man whose name you shout in your sleep.” He said.

Marinette’ head dropped, “Oh, God. Can I die now, please?” She groaned.

He laughed and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “No, My Lady! Don’t do that, I’ve just got you back in my life.”

“The nightmares started back after I saw you at your welcome home party,” Marinette said from behind her hands. “I don’t know why, but I’m reliving the fight again. The fear comes back to me and you… your reaction when we took the butterfly miraculous from Hawk Moth. I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to hear this.” She shook her head.

“I spent four years in therapy to get over that moment and many others. I can talk about it.” Adrien reassured her, “I’m worried that you spent the past seven years making sure everyone else was coping and nobody was looking after you.”

“I’m okay, Adrien, I promise.” Marinette rested her head against him. “Thank you for caring, though.”

They walked on in silence, unasked questions swirling around Adrien’s head. He wanted to help her, but she was so used to looking after that others that he wasn’t sure she could ever accept his assistance. He saw it all too often as Chat Noir; Ladybug had the weight of Paris on her shoulders. She felt personally responsible for every last citizen and cared deeply about each of them.

“This is me.” They had reached the hotel. “Are you sure I can’t see you home?”

“Ever the gentleman,” She giggled, “Honestly, I’m fine, it’s not far.”

He didn’t want her to go, was already missing her touch even though she was less than a metre from him.

“Why don’t you come up to my room and have a drink with me, then I’ll call a taxi for you. Deal?” He tried to be casual, grateful that Chloe had somewhere else to be after they left Nino and Alya’s.

“That’s fair.” She smiled, “Lead the way, kitty.”

»»★««

Once they reached his room, a knock at the door distracted Adrien so Marinette took in her surroundings.

Chloe had done a great job on the rooms, she thought. The furnishings were luxurious without being ostentatious (she talked Chloe out of garish gold and black Brocade curtains and convinced her that a mocha Damask would match the mink satin wallpaper far better). The room came with an espresso machine, phone speaker dock, bureau and two plush tub chairs and a low coffee table. It was cosy and she could see how Adrien was able to live here long term.

“Monsieur, Miss Chloe instructed me to bring this to you,” A male voice spoke, but Marinette couldn’t see who it belonged to.

“Oh, wow. Tell Chloe, thank you.” Adrien sounded pleased.

“And, ahem, Miss Chloe also said if you ever brought the dark-haired girl to your room, to give you this.” The other voice sounded uncomfortable.

“I… Tell Chloe, I hate her,” Adrien said seriously.

“I apologise, monsieur, I am just doing what I’m told.” The door closed.

Adrien returned, cheeks pink, carrying a tray containing a bottle of whisky and two crystal glasses. Marinette raised a quizzical eyebrow.

“A gift from Chloe.” He explained.

He set the tray on the coffee table before palming something small into the drawer of his bedside table. Marinette didn’t ask.

“I got into whisky while I was in Cambridge. One of the guys in my halls of residence, his father owned a distillery and he educated us on it. This,” He gestured to the bottle on the table, “Is Chloe’s way of showing off. It’s a fifteen-year-old Islay single malt that must cost at least €150.”

“She’s incredibly generous, isn’t she? Has she always been that way?” She asked, wondering if Chloe’s generosity was a newfound trait.

“She’s always bought gifts, but it used to be more proprietorial, I guess. It was like she was marking her territory if she gave you a present, telling you that you belonged to her. So, I don’t know, I suppose the selfless gift-giving is a new thing.” Adrien said.

He poured two generous measures of whisky into the glasses and added a splash of bottled water into each. He passed one to Marinette and put his nose in his, inhaling deeply. She did the same, unsure what she was smelling for. Adrien looked at her expectantly so she closed her eyes, blocking out one sense to focus on another.

“It smells like a bonfire on the beach.” She said.

He smiled in encouragement. “You have a good nose.”

He took a sip so she followed. She winced at how strong it was and the way it burned her throat when she swallowed. It wasn’t unpleasant, though, so she took another drink.

“It’s smooth,” She noted, “Sweet, a little spicy and… woody?”

He clinked his glass against hers, eyes twinkling. “You’re practically a connoisseur already.”

She liked it when he was animated like this. Since his return from Milan, she noticed that he was more restrained than usual. Never aloof, but he was definitely more guarded. Talking about whisky, in this moment, she saw a twinkle in his eye that she recognised from all the times she saw it behind a black mask. This was his freedom, pursuing simple pleasures, finding joy in the little things.

Her phone trilled and she flexed her fingers in response.

“Do you need to check that?” He asked.

“Sorry, I texted maman to let her know I’d be later than I thought. Do you mind?” She reached for her mobile.

He settled on his bed, curling his legs under him. Marinette checked her messages.

Maman: Of course, dear. Louis is fast asleep and your papa and I are off to bed too. Stay out as late as you like, just don’t be too noisy when you come home! Have fun x

She grinned and switched her phone to silent, slipping it into her bag. She perched on the bed, next to Adrien. He might not be a model any more, but he retained the effortlessly perfect posture from those days. There was a cat-like grace about him that was relaxed and accessible. These days, he was the perfect mixture of Adrien and Chat Noir; charismatic and flirtatious, but thoughtful, reserved. His fun side showed when he was with friends and it made his face glow. If possible, she loved him more now than she did in her teens.

His hair was lighter now, with flecks of grey just beginning to show and the cool tones in his hair made his eyes seem even more piercing than before. His green eyes searched her face and she felt him look into her soul. It was disconcerting.

“They’re not all nightmares.” She heard herself say. Where did that come from?!

“They’re not?” Adrien looked surprised at this outburst of honesty.

“No,” She cringed internally, why was she telling him this? His eyes were acting like truth serum on her as the effects of the alcohol hit and she couldn’t help herself. “I have… other… dreams that feature you.”

“Other… dreams?” His jaw dropped a little at this.

She chewed her bottom lip nervously, then swallowed more whisky for courage. She looked straight into his eyes.

“Other memories. More… pleasurable memories. Some… fantasies.” She prompted him.

“That leave you shouting my name? ...Oh!” He got it. He took a large gulp of whisky, too, and Marinette figured he was buying time to consider his response.

Wordlessly, he took her glass from her and set both on the dressing table. He sat closer to her now and cupped her cheek in his hand, stroking her face with his thumb. His gaze had become so intense, Marinette was worried she might melt into a puddle under it. Like the sun, it wasn’t wise to look directly at it.

“I have those dreams, too.” He was close enough that his breath warmed her face, it smelled sweet and smoky, like the whisky. “And… fantasies... about you.”

“You do?” She whispered.

Marinette tilted her face towards his, lips slightly parted as she felt him draw closer. Their mouths met hungrily and her eyes closed, once more blocking out one sense to focus on another. Their tongues clashed insistently. His hands raked through her hair, tugging slightly, pulling her into him. Urgency grew within her and she climbed into his lap, trailing kisses along his jaw until she reached his ear. She nibbled his earlobe and heard him sigh breathily.

“Wait,” He put his hands on her shoulders and pulled back.

“What’s wrong?” She bit her lip, worried that she had done something to upset him. Had she gone too far?

“Nothing,” He moved his hands to her face, “I want this. It’s just that, I need you to know how I feel. I still love you Marinette. This isn’t a fling. I want to have a relationship with you, if you’ll have me.”

“I love you too, Adrien,” She smiled at his earnest expression, “I want you in my life.”

Adrien grinned at that, his face looked younger and brighter when he did and she felt another swell of affection for him.

“Marinette Dupain-Cheng, would you like to be my girlfriend?” He asked, cheeks flushing a little as he did. It was adorable.

“More than you know, yes.” She couldn’t stop a happy giggle from slipping out.

He leaned back on to his elbows and she followed, resuming their kiss. It was less urgent than before and, somehow, more intense. In saying the things they’d been wanting to since Adrien returned to Paris, they were able to relax and enjoy each other.

One of his hands moved to her waist and the other cradled the back of her head. His kisses paused for just a beat as he flipped her so she was laying on the bed and he was on top of her. His tongue traced her collarbone, hands unfastened the buttons of her blouse, hips ground into her. She sighed and the sound came out as a moan. She pulled his shirt from his waistband and pushed her hands underneath, running her nails down his back.

They broke apart momentarily to remove their shirts and Adrien unclasped her bra, slipping it reverently from her arms.

“Adrien, wait. I don’t have any protection.” She said, putting her hand on his chest. The realisation arrived with a healthy dose of disappointment. Adrien, however, looked sheepish.

He reached over to the drawer of his bedside cabinet and yanked it open. A small blue square box sat in the otherwise empty drawer, the words ‘Extra-Safe’ emblazoned in bold. Condoms.

“Another gift from Chloe.” He grimaced.

#ml fic #ml fanfic #ml fiction #ml fluff #Fluff and angst #adrienette #marinette x adrien #alya x nino #alya cesaire #nino lahiffe #chloe bourgeois #Marinette Dupain-Cheng #adrien agreste #ao3fic #my fiction #my writing #Little Louis Dupain-Cheng

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multifandomhoodies · 5 years ago

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in the two minutes my brain was working i made this meme because i think it’s funny and while no one has told me to stop talking abt work i feel like this is lowkey accurate.

this will probably be super annoying and basically a ramble but hey ! I dont care. rondo alla turca just came on and that’s incredibly accurate of my mind rn just that super fast part. anyways. im so sorry.

hit that read more for the entire 2000+ word dissertation i wrote about work today.

so today was wild because fourth of july babey uh it didn’t start getting different until like,,,, 8 ish? mostly till then it was just regulars who are always in the park. i forgot my earmuffs so i couldn’t backpack blow when i wanted :c. nothing weird was in the bathrooms today! there was a lemonheads box in the women’s, but like,, that’s not very weird. i had several guests tell me that i was gonna have a rough day tomorrow w/ clean up and im like lol yeah Except i dont work tomorrow sorry tue-sat crew. love you. except fuck u danager. i had to get the cans along the beach and the guy that usually runs the beach comber wasn’t there so a different guy from the other park was doing it and he doesn’t run the beach comber v often and you could Tell. also this dude barely said anything to anyone except the one dude and honestly powermove. also he has Very long dreads. also this lady ? was laying like two feet away from where i had to backpack blow and she had the audacity to like, look at me? sorry lady its 8am the sun isnt even out stop sunbathing. anyways. i had to water the flowers i planted yesterday and after that it was breaktime (gang GANG) breaktime is like,, three hours after we start work but cleaning the bathrooms and backpack blowing and getting cans took forEVER. break was funny because it was just three of us in the breakroom and we were talking about the new manager who is. just a fucking asshole. he can choke. bitch. anyways. even tony doesnt like him and tony’s like so nice. i made a joke b4 we rolled out that liam could help me clean our part of the park and danager was like hey he can do that if you want to mulch and I thought it was mulching with HIm and I was like oh nO you thought hunty! i had to deal with your stupid ass yesterday! turns out it was just liam and tony and like honestly i would have done that that would have been super fun. and liam told me that he’d told tony about what happened yesterday with mulching. danager really called liam and i off of weedeating to mulch. at like, 1:30. we go on break at 2. he didnt care and was like oh you guys can just stay after and we’re like?? no?? unless we’re getting paid overtime and you dont have the power to make us do that? and liam today was like yeah if he does that shit again im leaving and tony and i agreed. im like ill walk home man. im leaving. tony said that even steve was getting pissed at him yesterday and steve’s a really chill dude. so collectively everyone’s like FUCk danager. and he came in from outside too and was like aight guys this is what we’re doing. hannah you should be able to weedwhip farther out away from your body. you hold the weedwhip too close and if you dont do that you can get a farther range. i kid you not the four of us that werent danager just started laughing. weedeaters (or weedw(h)ackers, or as ONLY danager says, weedwhips) arent very heavy. however. they do get heavy after a while, and they shake sometimes. a lot of times. We don’t get new equipment so it shakes. I’m hardly weak, but I’m also not strong enough to hold the weedeater like he said. so as soon as he said that i should be doing that everyone laughed. like i did too im like man you’re tripping. anyways. he left again, and so did two of the other guys again so it was just tony liam and i. kenny came back in and the three of us had been talking and when kenny opeend the door we all shifted so we could see who walked in, hoping it wasnt danager. kenny bust out laughing. “yall shoulda see your faces.” tony does a dramatic renactment of us all leaning forward to see who it is. oh it was great. tony liam and i were like in hysterics abt something (i think it was something rude abt danager i cant remember now). then we all headed out to do our danager assigned tasks. I went back to weedeating this one area. reminder that it IS the fourth of july, it’s like 9:30am and im weedeating this one part of the park. priorities? what are those. anyways so i do that. I see liam and tony leave to keep mulching. i keep weedeating. I did that and backpack blew the debris and then went over to the other part of the park to check cans. i checked cans again, had a super awkward situation with like 15 people near this sign. i tried to park my cart to check hte cans and EVERYONE STARED AT ME. like i know im wearing clothes specifcally chosen to be visible to cars and the public but the fuck you gotta stare at me for! anyways i got the cart and got the fuck outta there quick. I drove around more, some guy stopped me and said he thought there should be more speed limit signs. you’re right sir. drivers will see them and not care. i was checking trash in the one part of the park and i see tony and liam driving so i wave. by now it;s almost our lunch, its like 11:15. im going to check some cans that you like actually have to walk to, but i see tony driving towards me so i wait. they pull up, ask for the time. tony suggests we take a brisk walk to check the cans. we take a walk, but it’s not very fast. it’s very slow. we stopped to talk about dumb shit. liam’s apparently found a mink? on the pier? im so jealous? anyways yeah we wasted fifteen minutes looking at cans. we turn around and Danager’s walking towards us. tony grabs some trash off the ground immediately. danager doesnt even question it. he just tells us he wants someone to weedwhip or mow this one area, or at least be aware of it. tony and liam leave with dan, i head back to the shop. i hosed out the back of my cart cuz i got something FOUL in it. it may have been human poop. not sure. it was at least poop. lunch was more joking about danager. then danager came in and they started talking about muscle cramps. tony asked regular dan if he got cramps ever. dan shook his head. we dont think dan’s human. doesnt eat. doesnt SIT. only takes breaks because he’s legally required. jury is out. danager fucks off again. liam ate some of the ice cream. we chill until danager comes back in. then we leave. danager really told us to keep our weedwhips with us (also everytime liam or i say weedwhip mockingly we whip so i mean. yeah) and if we saw anything that needed weedeated to do it. ITS THE FOURTH OF JULY. THERE ARE SO MANY PEOPLE IN THE PARK. tony apparently reached for his weedeater and some lady started cussing him out. something about how there’s people around and whatever (all true) and he’s like yeah sorry i was told to but yaknow what I just wont! because it’s a holiday no one wants to weedeat. so danager told us to go clean up driftwood from the beach and tony’s like oh some of it may be big yaknow ill go with you guys. completely an excuse not to do work. it was fine. we went down to the beach. got all ten pieces of wood that were there. and we did not take them back to the shop to be dealt with. no. we may or may not have taken the trashcan full of wood to the treeline and yeeted the driftwood into the treeline/woods. then we walked back up to our carts. and didnt get in them. the three of us stood around the carts for like twenty minutes just talking instead of working. who cares honestly. i dont. as long as it’s not a habit,,, we cool. somehow we started talking abt pot and liam’s like Oh yeah i’m pretty sure everyone here gets FUCKED up on that. and tony (who’s been here for a summer) was like. oh yeah for SURE. he’s like yaknow weed’s okay. not that interesting ppl overhype it. liams like yea never done it been overed it never done it and im like never been offered, never done it. a ranger rolled by and tony’s like yo what if the ranger rolled his window down and just a cloud of pot smoke rolled out and his eyes were just red. what would we do. and we all just like essentially shrug emojid and kept talking. tony came up with the great idea to move out of the full sun into some shade. we sat in the carts in the shade and talked more abt dumb shit. we decide to eventually move and check some other areas for trash. just to look busy and also get out of an area that had a lot of people and access for a cart. so we went over to another section of the park and got trash. I had two bags, and Tony’s just like yeah as long as they see trashbags in your cart no one’s gonna care what you’re doing. We went over near that part’s bathrooms and dan and even dan was like,,, i see yall are fuckin off and i dont hate that. we actually talked with dan for a bit too. then we walked over to this area where ppl throw beercans and ““““checked”““ for trash there. skipped rocks. made stupid comments about shit. we were over there for like twenty minutes. aaaaaaaaand Danager shows up. he tells tony to go water some plants in the front. it’s 1:30 at this point, tony’s gotta go load the water, haul it out to the front, water. liam and i followed him back to the carts. he got in his cart, looked around to make sure dan was gone and did the finger gun to head thing and drove off. liam and i immediately were like okay we gotta figure something out we’re staying the fuck out of danager’s way. so we go to another pier and start walking it, looking for trash. we did actually pick up trash. there was a lot. after like fifteen minutes we headed back to the shop to take our break at 2 and danager’s on his way out and he’s like oh! hey you guys can weedwhip around the building! or clean up around the dumpsters. do something. “No use standing around for twenty minutes”. okaaaaaaaaaaaaay man. so liam and i are like oh yeah of course we’ll find something to do. FUCK I JUST REALIZED I FORGOT TO BLOW THE GRASS IN THE DRIVEWAY FUCK FUCKIJ’DJ’FKJALKJFLAKJF goddamnit. deadass sorry for abrupt switch but im sitting in my house at 10:25pm realizing i didnt get the grass in the driveway. ugh whatever. ending my regrets and back to earlier. so as soon as danager drives his way and we get far enough away both of us are like YO FUCK THAT and im immediately like.

i get as far as saying the first I from this and liam and I say the rest in unison. we share a braincell, i think. good job us. we’re both OVER IT. we throw our trashbags in the dumpster and grab pickers. we’re not sweating it but we grab some trash. i feel bad for tony cuz he’s out watering when it’s breaktime. liam says he probably wont be back till 2:25 when we have to clock out by 2:30. he wound up being right. a lot of shaking heads and muttering inbetween the four seasonals (minus dan) as soon as he was back. i clocked out and i told tony that he probably wont survive tomorrow with danager and that it was nice knowing him. tomorrow two of the techs will be back because they had today off. but it’s gonna be tony, the two techs, and danager. and possibly someone from the other park. not sure tho. like the BIGGEST oof because it’s gonna be a full day of trash cleanup and they’ve got danager there. and danager works the same shift as tony so anyday tony’s in, so it danager. the sat-thur crew got lucky. he told liam and i that on saturdays, the techs are out b/c weekends. it was just tony and someone from the other park and they’d. get the trash. trashbags and ground trash. and then fuck off in the breakroom. you can’t weedeat or cut on weekends. there’s not much to do if there’s not trash. they deadass would nap. and now they’re SCREWED because danager’s there. i’m so sad the one guy from the other park wasn’t there today. I can not WAIT to find out what he thinks of danager. fascinating. i almost worked tomorrow too, of my own request because I missed so much. but im sO Glad i didnt i do not want to spend anytime around danager that i dont have to. he fucking sucks. anyways. working my first ever fourth of july was,,, eventful. it mostly consisted of trying to avoid danager and kicking it with liam and tony. and that’s stellar. I really like both of them. i love my fucking coworkers. except danager. fuck you. also! no one offered us food :( apparently there is usually good food ppl offer to you and :( :( i didnt get food. oh today at work was wild. im so sorry for this post. it’s a hefty one. is this the longest post i’ve ever made on tumblr? yes. if you made it this far good job. I saw two REALly great dogs. the one looked like a bear. the other was a gsd. good job. god i love this job.

#work #long post #personal

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